Evening star., 1952-03-30
Problems
Todoy
Woman Places
Too Much Stress
On HouseWork
By Muriel Nissen
III MISS NISSEN,


worry Is my daughter. She is
married to a wonderful husband.
who works hard and is q good pro-
wider. They have one child, ayear
old. My daughter, however, is so
obsessed with keeping her house
in immaculate order that she is in
q constant state Of irritation from
overwork. Her husband owns a
store. and hasn't much time to be
home; when he is with her, she is
continually complaining about the
amount Of work she has, vet she
won't let up the least bit. I'm
afraid that her nagging. coming ct
him when he, too. is tired from q
hard days work. win result in
trouble between them.
I live alone In my own house.
and am perfectly content. ] visit
my daughter frequently. and would
like to help, but no one does work
to please her. My SON -iIl-law would
like me to live with them, but ]
prefer not to.
It seems to me. since she makes
such q project out of keeping a
house, that she'd be better OF in
an apartment.
MRS. M. N. T.
ANSWER: You very accurately
foresee the danger ahead If your
daughter continues to put house.
work before the welfare of her
family. Many women have the
same compulsion to maintain an
apple-pie home at the expense Of
family relationships, and seldom
do they change. OF course. a
smaller house, or an apartment.
entails less work and would give
a housekeeper more time for rest
and relaxation.
When a husband returns home
from a hard days work the thing
he would most like to find is q
quiet, peaceful home. Women. by
this time. are pretty well educated
to the fact that Daddy should not
be met at the door with a tale Of
Juniors latest delinquencies. They
have not been so quick, however.
in realizing that housework should
be over-or at least put aside-in
order to give the breadwinner a
peaceful evening. There is abso-
lutely no virtue in woman work.
ing herself to death just for the
pleasure of basking in the lime
light of martyrdom. She neither
deserves nor should, receive SYM
pathy. Furthermore, in spite Of
her own beliefs. she is not a good
housekeeper-and much less is she
a homemaker.
A good, really efficient house.
keeper keeps her home in good
order. clean, tidy, without fanfare
or exhaustion. The frantic scrub
bing to which neurotic women are
addicted simply indicates fanat-
ical obseSSion with one phase OF
housekeeping. while all the others
are neglected. Maintaining sue
cessful home, as have said many.
many times before. calls up every
resource the modern woman has
at hand. A successful housewife
combines the best characteristics
Of cook. seamstress, decorator
nurse, secretary, treasurer. diplo-
mat and civic worker. ,Allotting to
each job it's own percentage Of ef-
fort instead of spending all ones
energy on a scrub brush is what
makes a well-adjusted, balanced
woman of the house-a wife and
mother who is really doing a good
job.
You are right to keep your own
home. and to turn down the kind
invitation to share your daughters
polished premises. You would
never be at ease in the house. and
would yourself become an object
Of daughters irritation. Continue
your visits and lend a hand wher-
ever possible: more than that I'm
afraid you cannot do.
DEAR MURIEL NISSEN: Re
Gently I've been going with a boy
I like very much. My parents also
like him. The trouble is. he says
I'm always talking with my friends
but when I'm with him I have
nothing to say. Personally, I think
a boy prefers girl who doesn't
talk lot. JEAN.
ANSWER: The amount of talk
ing a girl does on a date depends
ON her escorts conversational
ability. If he doesn't talk much,
she must fill in the gaps. II he's
a good talker. it's up to her to be
a good listener. In your case the
for keeping up a
depends on you.
Don't shirk it. Before a date, read
up on whatever sports your boy
friend likes, learn some jokes or
anecdotes, listen to a few radio
,,roeyroyy,c With fhic m q tot.io1 y,1tlSt