The people's voice. [volume] (Helena, Mont.) 1939-1969, 1952-03-14
My "Two-Bit's Worth"
By LEVERNE HAMILTON,
Thompson Falls
THE INVESTIGATOR GETS
INVESTIGATE

Nv
Reports coming out of Washington
now indicate that Newbold Morris, the
Republican who was appointed by
President Harry to Investigate the De-
| partment of Justice and clean house
generally for the Democratic admins
tration, is having difficulties. Not nee
| essarily with the Department, it is re-
! ported that he found that himself, the
very first day, but from reports he is
having considerable difficulty finding
the JUSTICE. Well, he seems to have
task on his hands Quite number of
ordinary citizens have been puzzled for
Iseveral years as to what had become of
the justice and the general opinion
seems to be that it will require a siz-
able corps of assistants, with quanti-
ties of high powered microscopes to
locate even a small portion of that
commodity in the department.
Along with this report comes the in
formation that hundreds of govern
ment officials in several departments
are resigning on account of failing
health. Sad, isn't it? Seems as though
this public demand for a general house
cleaning has ruined more robust con-
situations than any plague or epidem-
ic that ever struck this land of the
free-enterprise.
It's really a complicated situation
No sooner does Harry appoint a good
and clean out Democratic crookedness
than some COMPOUNDED information
leaks out that the investigator and
cleanup man has been involved, or
some of his business associates have
been involved in some questionable
transactions of similar nature This
COMPOUNDED Joe Casey comes up with
the information that the high-speed
deal in which he and two friends made
$3.50, 900 on a 100000 investment" was
no tCha cd he lou Dffs ii
Morris partner. Dern it. 1t just seems
like rugged individualist can't have
any privacy any more. Why in heck
can't these COMPOUNDED taxpayers re-
alize that little thing like making
dinky profit of 45O% off of the pur-
chase of few government ships is just
part of our American way of life"
Seems like people are "gettin' too dern
persnickety lately" They never raised
any such sqwack a few years ago
about the sale of the steel plant at
Provo, Utah.
Yes, Harry appoints Morris to in
vestigate and that Immediately starts |
an investigation of Norris and his part |
ner along with former representative |
Joe Casey Admiral "Bull' Halsey, Ed |
ward Stettinius, and their partners |
it's case of the investigator investi- |
gated. And now I suppose if Harry, or |
some one else starts to investigate Nor |
rIs We'll have to get another investi- |
gator to investigate that investigator |
It's gettin' to be a regular merry-go-
CHANGING through a copy of News
week for April g., 1851 1 find this item:
1T is not generally known that it |
was the now investigation minded con-
gress in the first place which priced the
war surplus vessels so low that form
er Rep. Joseph Casey, Admiral Halsey.
md hot
were able to net $2,S0O,OOO profit on
a 100000 investment"
Well now that's really more like it.
Imagine a good old free enterpriser"
contenting himself with a dinky 450%
when he could make a real profit of
g. S00%. That's more in accord with our
American way of life. We don't do
land of the free-enterprise.
But now there it is again. Congress
set the price. Now doggone it 1 sup
pose we've got to get another set of
to investigate Congress.
Boy. Page Diogenes. If this keeps up
we won't have anybody left to investi-
gate the Investigators.
I was thinking of making sug-
gestion of my own about these investi-
cations. [ was thinking that possibly
we should have an investigation of
Fort Knox, Kentucky to see if there
was any of that supply of gold left
that Uncle Sam had stored down there
in that hole in the ground, but nope,
won't mention it. can see that we're
going to be short of investigators any
how and from the way things have
been going recently an investigation of
that nature wouldn't be able to find
anything but a hole in the ground
anyhow so it's best not to mention it.
Yessir, we're in kinda ticklish sit
1ation Harry recommended that Morris
be given authority to grant immunity
from prosecution to witnesses who
testified about corruption and their
part in it and I'm not sure but what
1t was a pertinent suggestion. If con-
gress had acted on it the politicians, in
Guiding congressman a n d senators
could have come in and testified, got
their immunity bath and been released
to go back to the job of getting rid of
the public funds as rapidly as possible
That would have put the grand climax
on all these Investigations saved us
he necessity of starting lot more in
employing a lot more in
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