The Hardin tribune-herald. [volume] (Hardin, Mont.) 1925-1973, 1951-06-14
THE NEW MEAT RULES

THE NEW MEAT RULES
THE latest OPS beef ceilings
! should be i~nterlocked with Ma
tional Laugh Week, Toothless Tues
day and All-American Confusion
Month. Under the DiSalle-Johnston
regulations tender cuts 60 up and
the ones so tough they fight back
when cornered 60 down a little.
Or vice versa. Even the butchers
are confused. And the shoppers are
too groggy to talk automatically. ALI
anybody can be sure Of is that the
v~egetarians are the only Americans
getting a break.
The butcher now asks, do you
want this meat for eating or for
wrestling?" If the housewife an
swers correctly she wins five sets
of OPS directives and has a chance
to go for the big jackpot question:
Should Mother Hubbard now sue
the dog to recover possession of the
bone?"
There is something new on the
American dinner table: The
Mike Disable Platter or Rip
and Tear Blue Plate Special.
Cry one and be convinced that
the rum0rs of a rubber short
age are false.) Washington pre-
pares and issues the new meat
rules, but refuses to commit It.
self on what the public should
use for knives and whether each
one should have a double handle
so two people can work on the
same cut at once.
The OPS has labored and brought
forth a tougher hamburger. In fact
there is a new hamburger on the
market. Instead of putting a thin
hamburger between two pieces of
toast they now acknowledge the linn
itations of the American jawbone
and put one slice of toast between
the two thin slices of hamburger.
This gives the aspect of a treasure
hunt to the routine act of appeasing
hunger. Meat is so high, since Mike
Disable and Eric Johnston began
protecting the public, that there
should be time payments and a
trade-in allowance on a used chuck
roast. Before the OPS started con-
trolling meat prices 1t took luck to
acquire a tenderloin steak. Now it
takes violence.
Porterhouse and sirloin are up
IL to IS cents a pound, aviordu-
pois, ad valorem and catch-as.
catch-can. II you want chuck, rump.
or worse you save a few cents. But
this is offset by the fact no ceiling
prices have been put on the larger
size hatchets and hammers. Or are
we still balled up?- Markets are
nov required to exhibit the cuts
In trays with ceiling prices attached
or nearly so. The effect Of this Is to
brighten the housewife sooner than
usual and steel her against future
rulings. The butcher-market song
Of the hour is when You Come To
The End Of a Perfect Tray and the
Prices Begin To Lower"
The more we look into the
matter the more we r salts
fled that the OPA gave us the
cold cut, the OPS gives us the
deep freeze. But maybe nobody
should kick. The ceilings help
the war effort. If you can bite
into any meat you get for less
than a dollar a pound you auto
matically b C o m e physically
eligible for the draft, regard
Z VI age VI ucpcIlucntSs
The meat men, insisting that it Is
impossible to carve up a steer to
comply with the OPS rules, offer
to bring a carcass to Washington
and let a butcher try to carve it
under DiSalle's directions. Mr.. Di-
Sale is not keen for the test. He
says he knows nothing about carv-
ing. Strictly a fork and fountain
pen man, we take it. (What are we
having for dinner? Stew. With the
fat cut off the meat but not off the
bureaucrats.)
- 49, =