Laurel outlook., 1950-10-11

Is d COInplCtc idloihNatOhs @N~
spider was the one who was
sitting on the tuffet. He was
minding his own business in &C
cordance with the devotion to
peace for which spiders are
noted all over the free world.
Miss Muffet swooped In with
out warning and drove him
away. 1t was a deliberate cross
ing of a frontier" said Papa
Malik, flatly.
"Give us old Mother Hubbard, "
pleaded the kids.
'This whole incident boils down,
as is we'll known, to the simple ques-
ton of responsibility for the dogs
starvation" he replied. "Why was
the cupboard bare? 1t was Old
Mother Hubbard's cupboard. She
must bear complete responsibility
for the fact there was not even
bone in it. There is evidence that
Old Father Hubbard is concealing
important facts in this case. At any
rate it is useless to discuss the cpl
sode until we hear from the dog,
which was clearly a victim OF
premeditated aggression"
One of the children recited:
''Little Boy Blne, come bloV yonr
born,
The sheep are in The meadoV, The
cows are in The corn"
"That is a gross Justification, as
is we'll known" put in Papa Malik.
"There were no sheep in the
meadow. 1t is true there was a cow
in the corn, but it was on training
mission. The attempt to call upon
Little Boy Blue is typical move by
despicable gauleiters to confuse the
picture"
"Who killed Cock Robin? :.
Tell us about that" said lit
tie boy.
my government is aware of the
fraud that has been perpetrated
upon all peace-loving children by
this one," said Papa Malik. "The
confession introduced as coming
from the sparrow is a shameless
example of the things to which the
dirty capitalistic warmongers will
resort. AS is we'll known, the spar
row was on a training flight and
did not come within miles of Cock
Robin. Furthermore, the sparrow
had no bow and arrow and was
completely unarmed."
"What about the fish that caught
the blood and the beetle that made
Cock Robins shroud?" piped
voice.
Fish! Beetles!" scoffed Papa
Malik. "They are vassals, tools,
bootlickers and exploiters."
Here the children chorused:
"Tbere aOas a fat man of Bombay
Wbo Was smoking one sansbiny
day.
When a bird called snips
Flew array Witb bis pipe,
Which pexed tbs fat man OF
Bombay"
'T desire to be heard on that"
said Papa Malik. 1.-THE snipe re-
spects the rights of others to smoke
as they wish without regard for the
American imperialists. The facts
show that in this case, No. 4637-A,
the snipe was smoking the pipe.
1t was set upon from behind. Prep
aration for the attack is established
by a newspaper photo of Foster
Dulles which proves conclusively
that he was the fat man. Bombay
had better keep out of this"
''Can we hear Hickory, Dickory
Dock, the mouse ran up the clock?"
asked the kiddies.
"You are mistaken. The CLOCK |
RAN UP THE MOUSE" snapped
Papa Malik.
But you didn't say as is well
KNOWN" gaSped all the kiddies,
presently frozen by a devastating
look.
lima Dodo went into a book
store yesterday and asked for
copy of Ernest Hemingway's
new book "Across the River
and Into the Three Martins"
Europe chose Miss Europe for
1850 the other day. Somehow this
makes US feel little calmer about
the situation over there, with or
without the Marshall plan.
In our Miss America contest, Miss
Irene O'Connor of South Dakota was
the runner up to Yolande Betbeze
and we can't help wondering if she
was shouldered out of it. Anyhow,
Miss O'Connor, remember the old
slogan of beauty contests "If at
first you don't succeed, thigh,
thigh again!"
Gypsy Rose Lee denies she is,
or ever has been, Connie and
offers, of course, to bare ALL The
story probably originated from peo-
pie who heard constant cries Of
''Takemoff" and assumed some
Russian was being paged.