Ottawa County news. (Port Clinton, Ohio) 1931-1956, 1950-11-24
OVER THE
BACK FENCE
By MARGUERITE FINEFRoCK
Calendar of Events

DN
Calendar of Events
Nov. 23-Thanksgiving.
Feb. 10, 1951-Music Mothers
Carnival.
Hiya Neighbor-During the past
month we have received, via the
u. S. mail, carload (well maybe
not quite that much) of advertIs-
ing folders urging us to hurry,
hurry, hurry and take advantage
of this and that limited offer be-
fore it's too late. Looking over
these folders en- masse, in all their
printed glory, we've concluded
that had we snapped up every
magazine offer and every book
club invitation that has come our
way we'd have to build on an addi-
tional room to house them and
then go into seclusion to get them
read. And yet, they all sound so
attractive that we feel as if we're
cheating ourself out of a good deal
when, with a sigh of regret, we
reluctantly confine them to File 13
knowing that ere long they'll be
enroute to the furnace.
Political campaign literature is
now a thing of the past but in its
heyday we received our share of
that, too. After reading the first
batch we knew that the country
would go to the dogs if we didn't
vote straight Republican ticket
and likewise the state of the union
would be in danger if we didn't
vote a straight Democratic ticket.
Letters from individual candidates
both Republican and Democrat,
extolled their own qualifications
and put the downbeat on their op-
ponents. So weighing the pros
and cons, we quietly dropped these
missives into File 13, also, and
when we went to the polls let our
conscience be our guide.
But the prize winner of all this
incidental literature is the letter,
fairly dripping with heartbreak
which we received from mail
order house wanting to know why,
oh why, hadn't we ordered any
thing from their catalog. To date
we had received their big Fall and
Winter catalogue plus several
smaller sales catalogues and still
we hadn't so much as ordered a
Upper or pair of blush-to-men-
tionS. Why? Months and months
had been spent in planning that
catalog to make it attractive and
give it sales appeal and yet we
hadn't even inkled an order de-
spite the thousands of wonderful
things it has to offer. So wouldn't
we please drop a card to the head
man of the catalog department and
tell him wherein they'd failed.
Well sir, l don't suppose it ever
occurred to the head man that
there wasn't anything we needed
or wanted from his catalog or, for
that matter, that little thing like
the lack of money might stand in
our way if we did. Nope, that
would be a much too proSaic an
excuse. We still think we ought to
write him though and give some
explanation in case the poor man
is chewing his nails to the bone
or losing sleep becouse we haven't
appreciated his efforts. If we do,
the letter will read something
like this, Dear sir: Your recent
letter has touched me deeply and
therefor l feel that l should ex-
plain my negligence in not order
ing from your catalog. You see,
it's this way pages 1913 and 1879
in your catalog are upside down
and while there are times when !
do get beside myself | never get
upside down and therefor | don't
know what's on those two pages.
At present | am practicing head
stands and when l have mastered
the art I'll be able to read those
upside down pages and then I'll