Evening star., 1949-12-11
Dorothy
Dix
Mothers Actions
Indicate What
Douqhter Will Be

A young man who is about to be
married asks me if I will give
him a few tips about how to make
his marriage a success.
This is well. 1t is a helpful sign
to find out that a man expects
to go fifty-fifty with his wife or
making a happy home and keep
ing her glad that she married
him, instead of wondering why
she did it. i
Now my first piece of advice to
any bridegroom is to pick out his
mother -in-law first. Don't look at
the girl. Look at her mother. and
listen to her mother talk, and OBJ
serve how mother treats her hus-
band. because ninety-nine times
out Of a hundred that will give you
q closeup Of what her daughter
Is going to be at As and how she
will treat you if you marry her
Next, make an intensive study
of the bundle of Inherited traits
and habits and contradictions and
nerves and temper that you are
tying up with. Most men never /
really get acquainted with their
wives. A husband can live with
his wife for 40 years without ever
discovering why she does certain
things and reacts in a certain way
to certain other things.
Furthermore, in your investiga-
ton in feminine psychology
would urge you to pay attention
to these three peculiarities of the |
sex:
First. That women never shed |
their sweet tooth, no matter how |
old they get. At 80 they still crave
to be fed on love talk and to be
treated as if they were brides.
Hence, if you want to keep your
wife happy. never cease courting
her.
Second. Never forget that wom-
en- put more stress on words than
on deeds. A man may work him
self to death to lap his wife in
luxury, but she will doubt his love
and consider herself a poor, abused
creature If he never mentions the
state of his affections to her.
Third. Remember that women
put an inordinate- value on little
things. You may beat a woman.
You may starve her. You NAV
neglect her. And she will still be
happy If you will only take her
out on an occasional party and
remember anniversaries and send
her now and then a bunch of
flowers.
Use diplomacy in handling your
wife. If you want her to be eco
nomical, don't knock her extrava-
gance. Praise her thrift. If you
want her to be a good housekeeper,
don't criticize her bad cooking.
Laud her pies and she will break
her neck to come up to your good
opinion of her.
Don't get married under the
hallucination that two can live as
cheaply as one. to say nothing of
q possible three or four or flve or
six. Don't expect your wife to be
. miracle-worker and run house
on air. Realize that matrimony is
an expensive luxury and the up
keep Of baby costs as much as to
Ply, on automobile n
Finally, keep on selling yourself
to your wife. Just remember that
getting married is the biggest
business deal you will ever 60 into,
and put as much intelligence and
energy and patience into making
. go Of it as you would in any
enterprise out of which you ex-
pected to make q million.
And. If you do. you will make
success Of it.
DEAR MISS DIX: After a man
marries, which should come first.
the wife or the mother? MARY.
Answer-The love a man feels
for his mother and that which he
feels for his wife are so entirely
different that they do not come in
conflict, if either the mother or
the wife will look at it in a sensi-
bic way. AS to his duty to his wife
or mother. that depends on differ
ent circumstances. If the mother
Is old and sick and the wife Is
young and strong, it would be his
duty to support his mother rather
than his wife. because one could
work and the other one could not.
But. generally speaking. a man
has a greater obligation to his wife
than he has to his mother because
her happiness Is a responsibility |
he assumed, and because the well
fare of his children depend upon
q - 4 n u u