Roanoke Rapids daily herald., 1948-11-18
HOME
Children
Need Their
Own Room
By GARRY CLEVELAND MYERS, Ph.D.

by GANNI SLEtELAND MIEho, rn.D.
THERE are still few slum areas
where several members of a family
must sleep in one bed. But if a rec
ord were made covering a big city,
, Of the number of children under five
or six who sleep with one or both
parents, more of such cases would
be found, no doubt, in spacious
; homes than in flats of a few small
rooms. This practice in comfortable
homes arises not out of necessity
but from bad management of the
child.
Of course, during the war many
young mothers whose husbands
were in the armed forces may have
been crowded in with relatives.
Sometimes lack of space caused the
mother to sleep with the young
child. Sometimes she slept with the
child in order to keep him from cry
ing and. disturbing the relatives
with whom she lived. More often
she slept with the child to satisfy
her starving emotional needs. After
the father returned and the family
had their own home, there was the
problem of training this child to
sleep alone. Some of these same chill
dren are still sleeping with one or
both parents.
Other Cases
But there are thousands Of other
cases in which the child's sleeping
with one or both parents for part
or all. the night did not begin be-
cause Of any of the foregoing fac
tors. Some of these mothers in
volved have lived in comfortable
homes since the child was born.
Some are college graduates, leaders
in clubs, churches, PTA's.
Not few of these mothers let
the nuisance develop because they
have been hipped with the silly doc
trine widely propagandized by cer-
tain "experts," that child must
not be left "to cry it out" in his bed |
alone, lest he might feel he is not |
loved and wanted. Of course, if he
is allowed to cry it out he certainly
is not wanted in bed with either or
both parents. But how silly to argue
that if child doesn't have his way |
in all matters he will suppose he is
not loved. Think of the thousands
of other ways this child can be as
sured he is loved and wanted.~In-
deed, the youngster who learns
early that he can't have and do cer-
tain things not good for him has
the very best training for making
it possible for the parents to give
him abundant and abiding affection.
In Own Bed
II your child two, three or five
demands that he sleep with you or
both of you parents all through the
night, or for the rest of the night in
case he should awaken, do this: Put
him in his own bed. You might have
his. bed at first in a room with an
older child or even in your room.
Later, his bed might be removed to
hisaown room. Well if he can feel
Alo64 OOlll llCal So1llC OldCl pei
SO he, can hear or be heard. You
might sleave his door ajar, with
dim light on outside it. After he
goes tosbed alone, or in case he
wakens insthe night, for him to hear
q familiar voice or reinsurance
might help.tBut under no conditions
should you let him come into your
bed. In case he "cries it out" it will
be well to besin easy hearing dis
tance, for safety. (My bulletin,
"Sleep Problems: Their Prevention
and Correction" may be had in a
stamped envelope.)
On the first night he may cry for
several hours, and for several
nights, but he willsgive up eventu-
ally. Don't attack this problem till
you are ready to see it through.
Just go on sleeping with the child
until then.