Evening star., 1948-04-20
Readers Clearing House
COMMENT.


iron, Mrs. M. A. A., Takon1d Park J
Just as I was feeling compelled to
write in to give the other side Of
the punishment problem, Mrs. K. w.
G. did an excellent job OF 1t. I
would like to add the following to
her fine observations:
The modern school Of thought
does not throw out the window
either punishment or discipline. It
merely frowns upon corporal pun
ishment, and punishment too strict
for the child's age or otherwise un-
suitable. Corporal punishment is
considered an admission Of defeat.
The quickest and easiest way out.
It was with some trepidatjon, Ill
admit, that I started out on this
modern" way. But I'm getting
confidence as I see the results, and
will most surely use 1t on my little
girl also.
Most important, 1t seems to me,
Is to hold back on the mo. Nos"
when ut all possible (and you'll be
surprised at how few mo, nos" are
actually necessary until you try it,.
Result: mo, No" means some
thing Is obeyed. Brac-a-brsc and
such are kept out Of reach. I pro-
vide plenty Of acceptable things for
play and experimentation, including
bottle tops, paper, boxes Of all sizes
and shapes, and the like. The rule
is praise and providing satisfaction
for good behavior, and . minimum
of attention and no satisfaction for
unacceptable behavior. Even mildly
severe scolding doesn't seem to be
necessary very often II my patience
holds out. My only slappings have
been, I'm ashamed TO say. when very
irritated, and haven't been repeated
because the hurt afterward In my
sensitive little boys eyes taught me
better control.
Every day I'm reaping my reward,
but it's not the one of having q
perfectly trained child. My reward
is to see my little boy obeying and
cooperating because he wants to,
and because 1t brings him the most
satisfaction, not because Of fear OF
punishment. I think that Is the
kind of self controlled and disci-
plined citizens We need more Of In
the world today, not the kind that
obey the law only when there Is a
cop on the corner.
I'd like to add an answer to the
lady who described complicated
method Of teaching a very young
child not to touch things without
permission. have achieved the
same results.
MY little boy usually looks at me
for permission before playing with
anything new either at home or
when visiting. He almost never dis
obeys mo, no." or repeats the Of
fense. OF course, he's not an angel.
Many times my patience Is sorely
tried, and sometimes I lose 1t alto
gether. But I can honestly say the
system does work, although 1t re-
quires hard work. My motto as I go
along Is to avoid slaps and spanks
for as long as I possibly can, and
what a thrill 1t is to get the desired
results without them!
Id like to ask those who reap the
Of untouched bric-a-brsc and
a fearful child, which Is most i'm
portant. the bric-a-brac and their
pride in their training, or the child's
best interest? Because If he's nor
NAL, the Illustration of too much re-
striction is bound to mount and it's
got to come out somehow. Maybe
it will be in nervousness or lack OF
self confidence. Maybe in the de-
velopment Of more serious problems,
or perhaps, later, even In delin-
auency or nervous breakdown. Even
then some parents won't agree, in
spite OF the psychologists findings
that the wrong kind of punishment
might have been to blame.
X 4 4
FORMULA STAINS.