Detroit evening times., 1946-01-25
Mary
IHaworth
DEAR MARY HAWORTH:

months and in that time j have
become very unhappy. My wife.
who Is a country girl, does not
Ny 10 save money, nor does she
hink of bank account except
as a place 20 get money when
.she wants some useless article
that strikes her fancy.
IL / ask her TO get something
for me when she is out, or do
some small service. such as
mending socks. she tells me she
forgot. Only last week END she
forgot half of our Sunday din
ner when marketing. She re-
lmembered at midnight Satur-
day night.
When l come IN from work,
either the bed isn't made or the
covers are just pulled up and
Strengthened. She never takes
the bed apart, SO 10 speak, TO
air the sheets and tuck them in
smoothly. She seems not 10 do
anything at all. We live in a
one-room apartment and il is
always untidy. When I get
after her, she starts washing
clothes late in the evening and
wants me TO help her, 1 work
eight hours a day and don't
care TO do the family wash at
night.
Then She Weeps
When l am home she wants
love-making all the time. II /
settle down with a good book
she interrupts, and il | continue
TO read she will start 10 cry
and say I am angry with her
She cries very easily As i am
still in the army and my pay is
small, we are going 10 have a
hard time meeting expenses,
much less saving money.
l have just learned these
faults Of hers since we got mar
ried. And my problem is, should
/ give up and get out. az
rather feel inclined 10 do in the
circumstances. or should / let
things slide and hope for the
4 best? I await your advice.
w. Il.
- The Riot Act
DEAR w. B.:
II would be futile 10 let
things slide and hope for the
best. On the other hand. 10
give up and walk out after six
months marriage would be TO
play gutter, conceding de-
feat without struggle. About
your wife's behavior it is dis
graceful. But my advice Is 10
give her the benefit Of a logical
attack on her shortcomings and
a full years grace, beginning
now, in which TO redeem or
hang herself, as she chooses.
Instead Of letting your dis
satisfaction leak out in bursts
Of irritation you car no longer
contain, go into huddle with
yourself and compile a penciled
list Of your major grievances.
For example, on grievances
(all OF which point 10 her fun
damental fault II selfishness)
you might jot down: Care
less spending. IS lovenly
housekeeping. lazy "forgetful-
ness" 3-Cry-baby 3 demand for
regard she alienateS. And so on.
Then. opposite Point l, these
notations: Salary as versus es-
Sential expenses utilities,
food. approximate need for
clothes. etc. - 10 indicate the
possible margin OF savings in
year. Here outline her disturb
Ing extravsgances 10 date your
reasons for thinking tn Q m
treacherous 10 your Joint wei
fare in the circumstances and
concluding recommendation for
vance consultation before
buying any nonessenuals.
Refotm-or Else
Against Point 2, I strongly
urge you 10 firmly demands
a must for decent living. mu-
tual self respect and survival OF
vlove-a we'll kept house. nun on
schedule by her advance plan
ming and diligeht labors.
Laundering, marketing and
the preparation Of satisfying
meals should not intrude upon
your attention, ever, in this
minimum family of two. Since
YOU work eight hours a day
your personal shopping is her
duty.
With this 1-2-3 list in hand,
sit down with your wife for a
thorough stock-taking. and II
she starts 10 blubber before
you're we'll under way, ask her
dryly 10 cut il out Tell her
this is a serious matter, that II
may mean the making. or the
end. of your marriage-that's
for her 10 decide. Let her know
YOU are in deadly earnest about
the alternatives: Reform - or
else.
M. II.
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