The Wilmington morning star., 1946-10-13
Broadway
Rv WALTER WINCHELL
E DREAM

SWEET DREAMS
When e'er at night l cannot sleep,
7 don't resort to counting sheep;
But tightly close my eyes, and then,
Conjure you in my arms again.
Thus fall adreaming in my bed.
Counting your kisses, dear, instead.
Ben Rood
When Admiral Halsey was here ne con-
vulsed listeners with his pet story IN when
he stars. 1t was a stormy, wartime, middle
of-the-nisht on the Pacific. Halsey and his
Flag officer (ex-Gov. Harold Stassen were
on deck, staring out into the ebony space.
Above them were two sailors, one OF whom
audibly nluttered: do you think the Old So
andso knows where-the-hc he is"
II dunno said the other, 'but the old b
has been all over the seven seas, SO l amt
worryin'."
stassen was hoping Halsey hadn't heard
when The Old Soandso %quipped: Harold
why do they always call me OLD?"
Joe e. Lewis, the Copa star, tried to send
this wire: Dear Senator TAFT: Why don'tchu
60 down to the O.P.A. and let them drop
a ceiling OIL your"
Taft isn't running for President, He's goose
stepping.
Some OF us were Cabling about the gravity
of the peace situation and one of the group
asked: whatever became of the Roosevelt
haters?"
They're now Roosevelt : mourners," sar-
casm'd Youknowho!
Barry Gray, whose all-night elegy makes
MANY of his targets see red (and others
green), was panning colyumists again.
my two favorite columnists," said the
highly opinionated newcomer, "can be identi-
fled by the initials of this station: W.O.R.-
Wilson Or Runyon. But I liked Wilson better
when ne was President"
Eugene Tillinger relays the one about the
two Russian soldiers in a small Partisan
bistro. One of them, in disgust, said to the
Frenchman at the next table: Look at that
poor waiter. He is unable to take care of
the business all alone. Poor fellow, how he
must rush back and forth. Not a single
moment tc catch his breath. Here you see
how working people are being exploited in
capitalist countries!"
II am sorry said the Frenchman, 'he is
not an exploited waiter. He is the owner
Headline: 'Goering Not Sleeping Well"
He will soon. The report adds: "Goering
weeps for first time"
Now amt that a shame, Name? Mebbe
Mr.. Taft should 60 over and hold Fatzo'S
paw for the next Few nights.
From a newspaper report by novelist Gene
Fowler, who used t.b. a neWspaperman him.
self. "Skolsky and Winchell were vacationing
in Miami when an assassin shot at Roosevelt
and killed Mayor Cermak. The two news
hawks are good pals. Winchell got to the Jail
first (and solo) to interview Zangara, the
prisoner.
Inside the barred and locked elevator Cat
the jaiD was poor little Skolsky trapped with
other scribes, all of whom were screaming
at W. W.
" Hey, Winchell!' yelled Skolsky. Get us
in there. Tell them you know mel"
THE jaile1 asked: Know him.
" Never saw him in ny life!" w. W.
poker-faced and then phoned the big scoop to
the N. Y. Mirror"
A delegate at the Paris Peace Fable asked
about a new fountain pen that writes under
water.
What you need said a reporter, lis one
that writes under tears
Edward Heller's contrib: A we'll
lntentloned, but poor, chap wished to erect a
stone to his recently departed wife's memory.
~ was a LAG A0u 'l1ld lC Idu W count |
the pennies to have an inscription placed there
on. So ne told the ''chiseler,' who graved out
grave-stones, to place on his wite's memorial
Lord, she was thine"
The man could not find space, so he simply
Lord, she was thin"
TRUMAN, TRUMAN, I've ben thinkin'
What a great world this would be,
If the boys could get together
On our foreign policy.
Frances E. Kaye 2
What we need is a emancipation Procla-
nation.
Dear Walter passionately writes Tom
Weather]y, 1--WE just found out what happened
to our girl friend, Maybelle, the sweetheart of
sigma Phi, who rolled her stockings below her
knees. Kissed with her eyes shut, and through
Rex Beach was a Summer resort.
"She married a guy named Joe, and has
a daughter, called Evaly1e, who coombs her
hair at restaurant tables, has a vocabulary
consisting of mink drink, stink sand says
we shouldn't fool around with that atomic
bomb because it's dynamite"
During ar outbreak e street and studio
violence IN the current Hollywood film strike.
Jackie Elinson reports that some pickets were
congesting the pedestrian traffic when a famed
and conceited movie star arrived in his limou-
sine. Seeing the mob holding picket singns, he