Evening star., 1946-05-16

of my shortcomings that I felt I
would not be entirely welcome as
a passenger on any of these means
Of Transportation.
To begin with, every passenger
pictured riding in plane. train Or
bus was strikingly handsome. All
the men could get Hollywood jobs
in a second and the women could
go right to work for John Powers.
1 would be an eyesore among such
people. I wouldn't have the nerve
to go barging in among them with
my ironing board profile, underslung
cheekbones and protruding fore
head. I feel positive that if start
ed to sit down by one of them it
would start a game of musical
chairs, with the handsome men and
lovely ladies moving about to avoid
me.
Sartorial SI!endOr.
My clothes wouldn't fit in with
the plane, train and bus set, either.
One of the first things I learned
as a child was to wear my oldest
clothes when travelling so that l
would have something nice and fresh
to put on when I arrived at my des-
tination. But even if I did put on
my Sunday suit or my ice cream
pants and blue serge coat, I still
wouldn't have chance sartorially
with today's travellers, because I am
a squirmer and a f1dgeter when I
travel and my clothes invariably
get wrinkled.
But not the men and women who
travel today. After hours, even
days, of cruising the heavens OIL
speeding across the earth, their
suits and dresses are as free
from wrinkles as blackboard
And what expensive clothes they
all wear! There isn't seer
sucker wearer among the men, and
the cheapest fur I discovered be-
ing worn by a woman was nape of
neck of chinchilla. One look at
my outfit and the chances are the
passengers would mistake me for an
old-time butcher and ask what !
had to SELL
Another reason why wouldn't fit
in with the people the advertise
ments would have us believe are
doing all the travelling is that dur
ing my 80 years on earth I have
somehow managed to accumulate a
few cares, worries and response
bilities. Today's travellers obviously
have no cares, worries or response
bilities.
No Sign of a FrOwn.
One look at the expression on
their faces furnishes proof of that
There isn't SO much as froWn in
a bus, plane or trainload Of them.
They're laughing, joking. They just
can't keep their teeth to them
selves Take even that handsome
only gentleman who is asleep in a
Pullman berth; he is snickering
with glee in his sleep. Even those
confounded cats are beaming.
Most of the time am pretty hap
py myself. but every once in while
I get to thinking about my respon-
sibilities and have to furrow my
brow slightly. don't believe I could
grin all the way to California, no
matter how fast the plane flew. or
how swiftly the new all-stainless
atomic plastic trains swept around
the curves. No, If 7 took q trip
my fellow passengers would call me
spoiled sport, as sure as fate.
I'd make slip and tell one of
them worry of mine, such as how
I am ever to pay the $3.50, 900 which
I pledged as freshman to my uni
versity. The university is still writ
ing me about that, though it is still
to get the first dollar toward the
chapel I had every intention OF
building when I was 10 years old.
No, it's the fireside for me until
some ugly, worried, shabbily dressed
people start getting about.
distributed by McNaught Syndicate, Inc }