The Waterbury Democrat., 1946-01-10

DEAR MARY HAwoRTH: Twelve years ago on a trip to Bermuda I met a young man from this vicinity. We did not return on the same boat but he came to call the night after his return. He has been coming ever since. Very rarely does he make c real date. He just drops in, aS 1t were, and if I am not home his stay is brief.
 This pest summer in particular he has spent much time at my house. There were times when he called every night in the week. We never went to a show, but frequent ly took 6 drive and often his father and mine would go along. My father is deaf and not much of a talker, but he loves to go driving. His fath- CT likes to n1onopolize the converse ton: and as nobody else got much chance to speak, there were times when wanted to scream.
 However, my friend is very fond of his dad and I was careful not to hurt his feelings. Since his moth. CT died 10 years ago, they live alone. I have been in their home dozens of times, although never for a meal. One evening recently, when was there, his father-apparently think ing we were getting too thick-de- fiantly told me that wasn't Marks only grill When he would have time to see another girl I can't imagine. But I must confess was shocked speeches..
 Mark is a man of few words and while he said nothing his face went scarlet. During these l2 years there were intervals when he didn't call, but for the last two years he has been more regular. Since that eve ming, however, he hasn't been around for three weeks, so imagine his father has let his unruly temper get the best of him, and the son doesn't want to make 6 fuss. There are two other sons, both married, and the father doesn't like either daughter-in-law.
 am deeply devoted to Mark and enjoy his company. I know the feel ing is mutual. And know his father is doing his utmost to break the friendship. In the circumstances, what should I do? Should try to forget Mark-knowing T. couldn't7 Or give him a, piece of my mind when he does come back? Or just carry on and ignore this sideline disturbance?
 J. c.
 Time To Give
 Man The Gate
 DEAR J. O.: Since Mark has coyl- stunned l2 years of your youth with his persistent informal calling, with never a hint of serious intentions while your average chances of ma- trimony are dwindling away; and since he flushes with guilt at his fathers hostile announcement that he has other girls, too, I think in your own interest 1t is time you gave thought to washing your hands of him.
 But you just couldn't forget him, you say. That's nonsense, of course. You can't if you think you can't. Yet you can If your heart Is set on mar riage. and he won't askl The sure cure for disappointment in love is 6 new heart interest. And Mark has become important to you primarily because he has been your lone beau since you met, gather. Still an- other value of a new heart interest would be this: It would provoke Mark. if anything can. into overdue marriage plans.
 About the time his father lalnch- ed his thunderbolt, it seems Mark was becoming, unconsclously. coEr flrmed in the habit of turning to you increasingly for soothing asso. ciatlon with one tried and true that he doesn't find at home any more. He was finding your restfully wsit- ing attitude a quito endeaglng trait. no doubt. Indeed. daresas he hes been drawn to you for years not