The Waterbury Democrat., 1946-05-15

SAy oAoSP WI AtI
 After one Broadway opening a famed producer hastened around to the critics bench to try and wangle an idea of how they liked it.. He pumped Percy Hammond, who kept poker face until the producer sneezed.
 God bless you" stooge said.
 You mean" said Hammond, God help youl''
 Dear Walter: In your roundup on literary pickpockets, you over looked the Mencken hoax that was taken seriously. Back in 1919 or 1920, to spool reformers, he wrote a fictitious history of the bathtub, claiming that when it was first introduced in the 184Os, by a Cincinnatian, laws were passed against it in Boston and other cities, and that the President who in- stalled one at the White House was defeated in the next election be- cause of it. The story was theft ed by several who took it as gos- pei truth, and eventually turned up as fact in an encyclopedia. It has cropped up periodically, though Mencken long since exposed it and the cribbers.-Clark Kinnaird."
 The other night at the Stork a world famous ham actor tainted, and his companion tried to re- vive him by skipping his face.
 Never slap a ham on the face" advised Billingsley, slap him on the back!"
 Earth is a strange planet in-
 deed
 tNo place to be born a guy on),
 One half its people stand in line
 for bread,
 One half stand in line for
 Nylon.
 -NATACHA BROOKS.
 A group Of Dublin's more digni- fled reporters called on play wright Sean O'Casey at his resi- dence. After Q polite reception at the door, the scribes were ush- cred into the library prepared for a formal interview. They seated themselves, looked around and then the lifted pinky "atmo- sphere melted.
 Draped across O'Casey's fire place was this sign: Get On With the Bloody Play!
 John Barrymore was arrested for speeding in 8 hick town. At the courthouse he rushed to the phone.
 We're only allowing you one call" said the judge, "so you bet ter phone your lawyer"
 Lawyer. hell," snapped John. I'm phoning my press agent"
 Have you heard about the spon- sor who dropped a certain MT. & Mrs. radio program out Vest but is still keeping the wife?
 Jest after the last election FDR had an appointment with visit ing Gov. But due to a meeting on war matters. he was detained.
 MT. PreNdent," his secretary said, T guess you know you have kept the Governor of Massa- chusetts waiting four minutes
 That's not so bad" winked Roosevelt. T intend to keep the Governor of New York waiting four years"
 E happened in the Senate gall lery when Bilbo started his short lived filibuster Spectators were apathetically listening to the so- and-so, when one of them leaned over to whisper to 8 companion. "Ssh," shishd the other, don't you know there's BORE on?"
 Inquiring phOtogger Sam Mellor stopped a group of ex-GIs to ask what they thought of the way Con- greSs is treating returning service men.
 Do you think" asked the news man, that Congress kept its prom ise and received the vets with open armS?" ..
 That's the trouble niftied an ex-GI (bandleader Herbie Fields), Congress welcomed us with open armS-ir1Stead of open minds"
 A group of reporters were dis cussing the fate of Goering.
 T guess they'll convict him." said one.
 I'm not 30 Sure," said a colum- mist. T hear the State Dept wants him as Ambassador to Spain"
 The Italian Government has bar