Evening star., 1945-12-16


ticipation by President Truman.
Edward J. Flynn, New York Demo-
cratic misunderstanding himself as
"a Southern Democrat from "the
Bronx, Moscow County, Mo."-sang
in a heavy Dixie accent:
I'm just wild about Harry-But
Is Harry wild about me?"
Hannegan explained: You have
asked a question that only one man
can answer. We address it directly
to the President of the United
States"
Spotlight on President.
The spotlight swung to the Presi-
dents table and Mr.. Truman replied
to the effect that he, too, was wild.
A suggestion of Republican sus-
picion that National Chairman
Brownell is trying to capture the
presidential nomination again for
Gov. Dewey was presented in a car
nlval sideShow Brownell was the
barker and offered an assortment of
freaks and specimens, folks: freaks
and specimens. Assembled from all
parts of the United States at great
expense-great expense to the tax
payers"
Brownell presented Fire Eating
Asbestos John Bricker, who eats
any fire the Democrats have
ever built - eats words, too" For
sword swallower Browneu
brougt out Artful Arthur Vanden-
berg. Got his reputation at San
Francisco" Brownell explained,
where he swallowed not one sword,
not two swords, not three swords,
but the whole next war" AS his
triple-threat man Brownell offered
Harold Stassen, the Three Man
one-half politician, one-half sailor
and one-half Republican"
Demand for Dancers.
To satisfy the demand for dancers
Brownell trotted out Joe Martin and
Wallace White. He described Mar
tin as the only hoofer in the world
who can put both feet in his mouth
at the same time"
For his singing attraction Brown
ell produced Bobby One Note
Taft" When he ordered Taft to
sing, Taft could do nothing more
than an off-key monotone: mo, no,
no, no, no, no.
All during the sideshow per-
formance a small boy had been an
noying Brownell, who told him to
go home and shave" Finally, the
boy identified himself as Tommy
Dewey and declared he wanted to
be the giant in the Republican
show-"I'm the smallest giant in
the world"
Brownell. embarrassed at not hav-
ing recognized Dewey, told him:
When these other characters
aren't looking, I'll sneak you under
the tent. And maybe If the donkey
doesn't throw you next year, you can
ride the elephant again"
Success Story Skit.
The success story of some men
formerly prominent in the Roose-
welt administration was set forth in
a skit entitled 1T Pays to Be a
Liberal" 1t recounted the surpris-
ing rise In the salaries of Harry
Hopkins, now employed by the In
ternatlonal Ladies' Garment Work
ers' Union; former Senator A. B.
Chandler Of Kentucky, now car of
baseball, and Thomas G. (Tommy
the Cork Corcoran, who is making
big fees as a Washington LAWYER
The scene was cocktail lounge.
The final skit, dealing with for
elgn policy, jibed American, British
and Russian leaders for their inept-
ness in handling serious questions
but also implored them to act to-
gether to save the world from de-
in the atomic age.
The scene was aboard the show
boat Of American Foreign Policy
manned by Skipper James F. Byrnes
and new crew. Byrnes turned the
wheel in all directions at once and
shouted: Full speed ahead! Full
speed astern! Full speed amidships!
We're off"
Where are We going this time?"
a sailor asked with resignation.
What do you mean, where are we
going?" deckhand countered.
Where have We been?"
The showboat slammed into Rus
(See GRIDIRON. Page A-5)