The Wilmington morning star., 1945-09-02
These Burea US

While the office girl was still alerting us
to the fact that Mr.. Homer Dewsnap was
outside, in walked Mr.. Dewsnap, beaming, to
park his hat, his umbrella, his armful of the
days papers and his stout self and to draw
from his pocket a clipping, which read:
'The Federal Government is swollen now
to 1141 bureaus employing nearly 5000 900
persons"
figures? No. he said, but he wished to ex-
press resentment at the tone of the sentence
Swollen" as used, seemed to him an un-
pleasant word. Like the word "sprawing" so
popular lately with politician CRITICS of the
Government vast accumulation of bureaus
and agencies, it was Intentionally opprobrious
"The impression is created" our caller
went on, that mobs of hungry bureaucrats
have muscled in upon Washington and are
now debating to the American people in
much the same way that racketeers used to
dictate to their victims in the business COM
munity in the gangster-ridden Nineteen Tween
ties.
According to that view of it, any lame
duck politician any college professor or other
impractical visionary anybody at all who
has never had to meet payroll can take
refuge in the national capital, set up a bu-
reau and proceed at his own sweet will to
4CcO az u1C puD11C IlOuSu dIlQ RUE Tile long
suffering people who pay the bills.
''For the purpose of the Governments loyal
opposition, that is the correct view, no mat
ter which of our famously economical major
parties happens to be in power. If the Re-
publicans are in, it is proper for the Demo-
Gratis to cry Bureaucracy till they grow so
hoarse they have to cancel their radio en-
gagemenst And vice versa. On paper, both
parties are committed to stripping the Gov
eminent down to the bare running gear con-
templated by the Founding Fathers. Never
theless, the bureaus increase, and their per-
sonnet rivals the sands of Jones Beach for
multitude.'
But another view of the matter, Mr.. Dew
snap thought, might be taken. This other view
would consider the inveterate habit Ameri-
cans have of demanding services from their
Government.
I'VE are" said he, "a demanding people.
We want the Government to perform mil
lion tasks for us, from inspecting the meat
we eat and the steamboats, we ride in, 10
eliminating pellagra, holding down freight
rates, carrying our parcels, building our
dams, forecasting the weather, telling us the
true time, prescribing for our elm trees that
shed their leaves in July, and advising us
about the state of the market for folding beds
in Baluchistan.
1--WE ask it to look after our forests OUT
soil, our Indians, our savings, our lighthouses
our battlefields, our hot springs, san dunes
and natural bridges and the grander of our
canyons We expect it to conserve our pc
troleum, reclaim our waste lands, sell our
surplus commodities, safeguard our miners,
rescue our disaster victims and fight our Jap
anese beetles. And that's only the beginning
of the jobs, labors, projects, operations, COM
missions and chores we wish upon our Gov
eminent, the servant of us ALL
Drawing long breath, Mr.. Dewsnap
enumerated other activities which Uncle Sam,
man of all work, undertakes for his masters
the citizens.
"Then, too" said Mr. D., there is his
huge task of keeping us all encouraged These
times very discouraged It's dull week
when some DESTROYS group of can't think
OF an excuse for rushing to Washington and
pressuring our Congressman into asking Uncle
Sam to encourage us.
Time wa S." Mr.. DeWsnap continued,
when the old boy seemed flinthearted to
such appeals, but that time has passed And
since he must have large bureaus and agen-
cies to deliver these large quantities of en-
couragement the wonder is not that there are
so many bureau workers but that mere
corporal's guard of 3,O0O,OOO of them can pos
slbly handle the encoura cement business
alone, over and above the oldfashioned rou-
tine services Government renders as mat
ter of course
Our caller reached for his hat, his UNI
brella and his bundle of papers and depart
ed, putting his head in at the door again to
add:
Suppose our swollen Government should
decide at this late day, to reform. Suppose
it should cut out even one of the countless
services on its program-services the people
have demanded and Congress has authorized.
Think of the howl that would rise! You could
hear it clear to the moon New York Times.