davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Bradley beam., 1945-09-01

One of the outstanding members of the armed services Che has a medal from Hitler to prove it) is T/ Saduyell J. McSackus, Charac- ter First Class. As goldbrick-at- large functioning at his listening post behind the Mess Hall garbage rack there is no better man than TT McSackus. 7 TIT McSackus, known as Sad Sack to his friends, was born-un- fortunately. Exactly where, has been long and burning question but the rumor circulating among members of the Explorers Club has it that he "issued" from a vol canic island off Gowanus Canal, long since sunk beneath the waters. At the tender age of six, Sad Sack received employment as an accoun- tant with "Frisky-Joe,' Inc, a famed bookie, and under such able tutoring soon forged ahead in his own right-until the FBI caught up with his forging. We almost forgot to mention his education. Aside from graduating Gum Laude" from South South Western Reform, it was negligible.
 T/7 McSackus, the "elusive" as he was known to his draft board, entered the military service, with prodding, on 1 April, 1914. He inn mediately made a hit with the Ar my. Everybody hit him and the dogs bith him. He was very happy, dogs bit him. He made an ACCT score of-1OO. A record, in reverse. After three days of long, intensive basic training at Camp Dilpew, Skunk Hollow, Conn.,, he received his T/7 rating and was given an MOS of 900, or GAL. Gold brick-at-Large). Proud of his fami-
Bradley beam., 1945-09-01
The Case of the Missing Beagle
(From the July P 1914 Issae)

It was dark and stormy night, we'll, actually it was about 1000 on a bright sunny morning-but who ever heard of mystery at that hour? Joe Seaha, popular proprie- tor of Joe's, Eats for the Elite, Ladies Invited, was busy burning a hamburger. Outside the building slightly adjacent to the Main Gate, his faithful hound "D-Day," four months-old beagle, was busy yap- ping away at the occasional G. Is who passed. Then, suddenly, the yapping ceased; but Joe, deafened temporarily by the sizzle of roast ing weiner, didn't notice the hush. At approximately 1912 he left his stand behind the counter to pay a visit to his favorite pup. Alas and alack, "D-Day" was gone. All that remained was an empty, forlorn- looking leash and puppy footprints in the sand, mute testimony of the hound that had been.
 Joe was aghast! His best friend
Bradley beam., 1945-09-01

was gone. No longer would the sound of "D-Day's" whimpering Hull him to sleep in the wee hours of the morning. No longer would the sound of pattering paws greet him as he awakened. No longer would "D-Day's" melancholy eyes stare into his, begging for a stray bit of beef or a confding pat upon the brow.
 We'll, that's the story, dear read CTS. All this took place few days ago but as yet "D-Day" has failed to return and Joe admits with tear in his voice that "He hasn't even written" Joe still hopes that love will triumph over all, that "D-Day" will return to the happy comfort of his masters lap, but he figures "D-Day" may need help. If you can help "D-Day" return to his masters arms, please do. Joe has promised reward. Meanwhile, we of Bradley say: Buck up Joe. It's always darkest before the dawn isn't it ?"
Bradley beam., 1945-09-01

Dear boys, with Easter just a short dash around the corner (but be careful not to slip on the ice) all of us are simply too excited looking forward to the coming 1914 Spring styles. As Style Editor, we have just received an exclusive re- lease from 0 M. designer, Mile. Distractmore Drippleat on what we may expect in G. I. fashions for "A. Such verve and dash, such chic, you'll be thrilled to death, as I.
 According to Mile. Drippleat, Q. M. modistes have really "stolen" their Spring ideas straight from the style center of the world = Windsor Locks, Connecticut. G. Is this year will be wearing a simply ducky chapeau given the vivacious name, La Service Cappe Ameri- cana. It is a daring creation, perch ed over the wearer's right eye (two finger depths, as when somebody says: "say when'). The hat, a gay olive drab, is trimmed in striking shades of blue-gold braid piping, lending a sparkle that can't help but please the most exacting G. I.
 Trousers this year will drape from the hips, with pleats and cuffs absolutely taboo for the duration and six months. Although design CTS planned for a plaid season it was eventually decided that olive drab would be more fattering to the average member of the armed services. Forty-four shirt styles are, without question, terrific. Col ored to match your Spring ensem- ble, they are cut along the lines set by the famous French fashion crea- tor, Ignorant Chirtailovitz. They offer a neutral collar tab and deep russet buttons. You'll just adore them.
 In a definite tailored look"
Bradley beam., 1945-09-01

ly's Army tradition (his great great-grandfather was said to be the original runner at the Battle of Bull Run but was, unfortunate ly, shot for running in the wrong direction) Sad Sack expected to go on to great things. He did. K. P.
 Outstanding in Sad Sacks mili- tary career have been the three honors bestowed upon him by the powers that be. He appears weekly in TANK. 2-His name has become synonymous with every thing worse" in a c. I. 31He was recently awarded Band Con- duct Ribbon. A black ribbon with six devil horns and a poison ivy cluster. By way of relaxation Sad Sack prefers sports (the type who ask him if he'll have wee one on the house) and tends toward things literary, At present he is writing his life story for the TRUE RE- PULSIVE STORIES magazine. Following his discharge from the Army (this is contemplated as a strategic move to fool the Japs), he hopes to return to his old posi- tion as a money-changer in dough factory. When asked by the BEAM interviewer as to what he accounted his great success, the Sack replied, "Nullum magnum in genium sine mixtura dementiae,"* "* which we think hit the nail right on it's proverbial head.
 *There was never a great genius
 without a mixture of madness.
 Seneca-De Tranquillitate Ami
 mi, XVII, 10. (Ed Note: For
 other afflicted persons. We do
 know our stuff.)
Bradley beam., 1945-09-01
THE SEVEN WONDERS OF BRADLEY
(From the April 29, 1914 Issae)

Its close proximity to Brooklyn.
 Bradley garden located that delight region hour find of comfort make pilgrimage the City of 2-YOur fhOice of seasOns
 Bradley Field choice You have the whichever like best de- pending whether ostrich This is indeed wonder 3-The statues of Bradley. goldbickne The legend has it that they alive but Army 333333 30 February 1899 froze them their positions this, indeed, a wonder, too? 4-The passes at Bradley.
 don't make who glasses little which when shown to the proper authority, and oicin Hartford Wonder what! 5-A date at Bradley
 goes with girl Bradley is ikened merely surrounded By soft flesh. Haven't wondered about that? 6-The Bradley BEAM
 of of all and slightly buffalo Wonder Der 6, ndeedi
 Bradley being wonderous wheels overlong of daschun OOpanger trailer jobs life tired "pekes For crush rush. the der of the bus wi never
Bradley beam., 1945-09-01
/? Have You Had Furlough Lately
 IF NOT ADDRESS FURLOUGH PROCUREMENT COMPANY, Inc.

Route #5 Goldbrick Haven, Conn
 had trouble getting uoughs? Does First Ser days of? Are tired and need of home cooking and relaxation? GET furlough obtainers fix you up
 very easy. Simply line the above address serial number and the date All of fuough printed heavy bond suitable for framing and three coors red white and blue Signatures of Officers Sly vanian script while the printing old english Frnkyian
 Remember soldier, need fuough Every c. l. needs of think three won't do We in position help be fifteen days off, Date of last uroueh thing either. WE connections Whats gesture good will the part of famous All need do send the crumbs from five FRANKENSTEIN PRETZELS.. that's all A FURLOUGH A DAY KEEPS K P. AWAY-WRITE NOW FOR FREE BOOKLET SHOWING ACTUAL PICTURES OF G. Is ENJOYING ONE OF OUR BURROUGHS INTEREST ING. EXCITING.
Bradley beam., 1945-09-01

A soldier travelling through Mi agara Falls en route to new as signment got into a conversation with an old settler and his son at the railroad station. "It looks as if the sun might come out" remarked the soldier.
 "I hope so," replied the native. Mot so much for myself as for the boy here. I've seen the sun."
Bradley beam., 1945-09-01
Tid>Bits From Past Issues of the BEAM .
Non-Entity of the Week
NWith Apologies to all Pfcs.)

ike BEAM carried weeky aterDiews entitled Oficer Week' a~d "NonCo of ike Week. Ike foHowi~s satire features appeared 1924 o te BEAMs April supplement. The Sad Sack Cocker SbdI belonging Perman formerly this Basel
Bradley beam., 1945-09-01

"Why do they always make us undress when we go on sick call ?''
 Beats me-" said a naked by stander, "I just came in to check the fire extinguisher."
 There's many an elderly man with young looking figure, but we wouldn't want his wife to see him with it.
Evening star., 1945-06-05

Of Soviet Socialist Republics and the
United Kingdom, and the provisional
government of the French Republic
the four Allied governments will
take such steps, including the COM
plete disarmament and demilitariza-
ton of Germany, as they deem
requisite for future peace and
security.
b. The Allied representatives will
impose on Germany additional po-
litical, administrative, economic,
financial, military and other re-
quirements arising from the COM
plete defeat of Germany. The Allied
representatives, or persons or agen-
cies duly designated to act on their
authority, will issue proclamations,
orders, ordinances and instructions
for the purpose of laying down such
additional requirements, and of
giving effect to the other provisions
Of this declaration. All German au-
thorities and the German people
shall carry out Internationally the
requirements of the Allied repre-
sentatives, and shall fully comply
with all such proclamations, orders,
ordinances and instructions.
ARTICLE ID.
This declaration enters into force
and effect at the date and hour set
forth below. In the event of failure
on the part of the German authori-
ties or people promptly and COM
pletely to fulfil their obligations
hereby or hereafter imposed, the
Allied representatives will take
whatever action may be deemed by
them to be appropriate under the
circumstances.
ARTICLE Is.
This declara tion is drawn up in
Evening star., 1945-06-05
DECLARATION.

Regarding the defeat of Germany
and the assumption of supreme
authority with respect to Germany
by the governments of the United
States of America, the Union of
Soviet Socialist Republics and the
United Kingdom and the provisional
government of the French Republic
The German armed forces on land
at sea and in the air have been
completely defeated and have sur
rendered Internationally and Ger
many, which bears responsibility for
the war, is no longer capable of re-
SiSting the will of the victorious
powers. The unconditional sur
render of Germany has thereby been
effected, and Germany has become
subject to such requirements as may
now or hereafter be imposed upon
her.
There is no central government or
authority in Germany capable Of
accepting responsibility for the main
tenance of order, the administration
of the country and compliance with
the requirements of the victorious
powers.
1t is in these circumstances neces-
sary, without prejudice to any sub
sequent decisions that may be taken
respecting Germany, to make pro-
vision for the cessation of any
further hostilities on the part of
the German armed forces, for the
maintenance of order in Germany
and for the administration of the
country, and to announce the i'm
mediate requirements with which
Germany must comply.
Make Joint Declaration.
The representatives of the supreme
commands of the United States of
America, the Union of Soviet Social
lst Republics, the United Kingdom
and the French Republic, hereinafter
call the ALLIED representatives, 4"
acting by authority of their respec-
tive governments and in the in
terests of the United Nations, ac-
cordingly make the following decla-
ration:
The governments of the United
States of America, the Union of
Soviet Socialist Republics and the
United Kingdom, and the provisional
government of the French Republic,
hereby assume supreme authority
with respect to Germany, including
all the powers possessed by the Ger
man government, the high command
and any state, municipal or local
government authority. The assump-
ton, for the purposes stated above,
Of the said authority and powers
does not effect the annexation of
Germany.
The governments of the United
States of America, the Union of
Soviet Socialist Republics and the
United Kingdom, and the provi-
sional government of the French
Republic will hereafter determine
the boundaries of Germany or any
part thereof and the status of Ger
many or of any area at present be-
ing part of German territory.
In virtue of the supreme author
ity and powers thus assumed by the
four governments, the Allied repre-
ntatives announce the following
requirements arising from the COM
plete defeat and unconditional sur
render of Germany with which Ger
many must comply:
ARTICLE l.
Germany and all German mill
tary, naval and air authorities and
Evening star., 1945-06-05
Wotchmon's S 5-Story Fall
To Death Held Accident

Percival Thomas Lewis, 70, OF 134s
Irving street NV, a night watch
man in the Transportation Build
ing, who was killed Sunday night
when he fell five stories down
stairwell while at work, met death
accidentally, according to a certifi-
cate issued today by Coroner A. Ma!
gruder Macdonald.
Mrs. Lewis body was found on
the second floor by another en-
ploye, police said.
Evening star., 1945-06-05
Sports Program
For Local Fans
TODAY.

TODAY.
Baseball.
New York at Washington 90
ttwilight-night), $50.
Coolidge at Eastern Gnterhigh
championship game), 4.
TOMORROW.
Baseball.
New York at Washington
might, $50.
Wrestling.
Weekly wrestling program,
Turner's Arena, $50.
FRIDAY.
Baseball.
Washington at Philadelphia
might.
SATURDAY.
Baseball.
Washington at Philadelphia.
Maryland at Virginia.
Evening star., 1945-06-05

of the United Nations who are con-
fined, interned or otherwise under
restraint, and all other persons who
may be confined, interned or other
wise under restraint for political
reasons or as result Of any Nazi
action, law or regulation which dis
eliminates on the ground of race.
color, creed or political belief.
c. The German authorities will, at
the demand Of the Allied represent
atives, hand over control of places
of detention to such officers as may
be designated for the purpose by the
Allied representatives.
ARTICLE 7.
The German authorities concerned
will furnish to the Allied represent
atives:
A. Full information regarding the
forces referred to in Article IA,
and, in particular, will furnish forth
with all information which the AL
lied representatives may require
concerning the numbers, locations
and dispositions of such forces,
whether located inside or outside
Germany;
B. Complete and detailed infor-
nation concerning mines, minefields
and other obstacles to movement by
land, sea or air, and the safety
lanes in connection Herewith. AL
such safety lanes will be kept open
and clearly marked: all mines,
minef1elds and other dangerous OBJ
stacles will as far as possible be
rendered safe, and all aids to navi-
cation will be reinstated. Unarmed
German military and civilian per-
sonnel with the necessary equip
ment will be made available and
utilized for the above purposes and
for the removal of mines, mine
fields and other obstacles as direct
ed by the Allied representatives.
ARTICLE 8.
There shall be no destruction, re-
moval, concealment. transfer or
scuttling of, or damage to, any mill
tary, naval, air, shipping. port, in
dustrial and other like property and
facilities and all records and ar
chives, wherever they may be stu
ated, except as may be directed by
the Allied representatives.
ARTICLE ..
Pending the institution of control
by the Allied representatives over
all means of communication, all
radio and accommodation in
stallations and other forms of wire
or wireless communications, whether
ashore or afloat, under German con-
troll. will cease transmission except
Evening star., 1945-06-05

munications facilities and equip
ment, by land, water or air;
v. All military installations and
establishments, including airfields,
seaplane bases, ports and naval
bases, storage depots, permanent
and temporary land and coast forti-
f1cationS, fortresses and other forti-
fed areas, together with plans and
drawings of all such Notifications,
installations and establishments;
vi. All factories, plants, shops, re-
search institutions, laboratories,
testing stations, technical data, pat
ents, plans, drawings and inven-
tions, designed or intended to pro-
duce or to facilitate the production
or use of the articles, materials and
facilities referred to in subpara-
graphs I, II, III, Nv and v above or
otherwise to further the conduct of
war.
b. At the demand of the Allied
representatives the following will
be furnished:
I. The labor, services and plant
required for the maintenance or
operation of any of the six cate
gories mentioned in paragraph (a)
above; and
II. Any information or records
that may be required by the Allied
representatives in connection with
the same.
c. At the demand of the Allied
representatives all facilities win be
provided for the movement OF Allied
troops and agencies, their equipment
and supplies, on the railways, roads
and other land communications OF
by sea, river or air. All means Of
transportation will be maintained in
good order and repair, and the labor
services and plant necessary there
for will be furnished.
ARTICLE s.
A. The German authorities will
release to the Allied representatives
in accordance with the procedure to
be laid down by them, all prisoners
of war at present in their power, be-
longing to the forces of the United
Nations. and will furnish full lists OF
these persons, indicating the places
OF their detention In Germany OF
territory occupied by Germany
Pending the release of such prison.
ers Of war, the German authorities
and people will protect them in their
persons and property and provide
them with adequate food, clothing
shelter, medical attention and
money in accordance with their rank
or official position.
B. The German authorities and
people will in like manner provide
for and release all other nationals
Evening star., 1945-06-05

This declaration is drawn up in
Evening star., 1945-06-05
Kuvukos' Friedman HurIs
Softly League No-Hitter

Tonight's doubleheader in the
Northeast Night Softball League
pits Kavakos Grill against Mount
Rainier and Arlington Asphalt
against Naval Medical Research in
the opener at 7:45.
Last night Jack Friedman hung
up a no-hitter for Kavakos as the
latter defeated Royal Restaurant
20, and the Merrick Girls edged
Garvins Grill, 5-4.
Evening star., 1945-06-05
S directed by the Allied representa-

as directed by the Allied representa-.
tives.
ARTICLE 10.
The forces, nationals, ships, air.
craft, military equipment, and other
property in Germany or in German
control or service or at German dis
posal, of any other country at wal
with any Of the Allies, will be SUBJ
ject to the provisions of this dec
laration and Of any proclamations
orders, ordinances or instructions
issued hereunder.
ARTICLE
a. The principal Nah leaders as
specified by the Allied representa-
tiveS, and all persons from time tc
time named or designated by rank
ofice or employment by the Allied
representatives as being suspected o1
having committed, ordered or abet-
ted war crimes or analogous offenses
will be apprehended and surrendered
to the Allied representatives.
(b) The same will apply in the
case Of any national of any of the
United Nations who is alleged to
have committed any offense against
his national law, and who may at
any time be named or designated by
rank, office or employment by the
Allied representatives.
(c) The German authorities and
people will comply with any instruc-
tions given by the Allied represent
atives for the apprehension and
surrender of such persons.
ARTICLE IL.
The Allied representatives will
station forces and civil agencies in
any or all parts Of Germany as they
may determine.
ARTICLE 13.
(a) In the exercise of the supreme
authority with respect to Germany
assumed by the Government of the
United States of America, the Union
Evening star., 1945-06-05

in their respective zones of occupa-
ton and will reach agreed decisions
on the chief questions affecting
Germany as whole.
Plan Co-ordinating Committee.
3. Under the Control Council,
there will be permanent co-ordi-
mating committee composed Of one
representative of each of the four
commanders in chief and a control
staff organized in the following divi-
sions (Which are subject To adjust
ment in the light of experience
Military, naval air, transport, po-
litical, economic, finance, repara-
ton, deliveries and restitution, IN
ternal affairs and communications
legal, prisoners of war and displaced
persons, manpower
There will be four heads Of each
division, one designated by each
power. The staffs of the divisions
may include civilian as we'll as mill
tary personnel, and may also, in
special cases, include nationals of
other United Nations appointed in
a personal capacity.
4. The functions of the Co.
ordinating Committee and of the
control staff will be to advise the
Control Council to carry out the
councils decisions and to transmit
them to appropriate German organs
and to supervise and control the
day-to-day activities of the latter.
5. Liaison with the other United
Nations governments chiefly inter-
ested will be established through
the appointment by such govern
ments of military missions (Which
may include civilian members) to
the Control Council. These mis-
sions will have access through the
appropriate channels to the organs
of control.
6. United Nations organizations
will, if admitted by the Control
Council to operate in Germany, be
subordinate to the Allied control
machinery and answerable to it.
T. The administration of the
Greater Berlin" area will be di-
rected by an inter-Allied governing
authority, which will operate under
the general direction of the Control
Council and will consist of four
commandants, each of whom will
serve in rotation as chief COM
mandant. They will be assisted by
a technical staff which will super
wise and control the activities of
the local German organs.
8. The arrangements outlined
above will operate during the period
of occupation following German
surrender, when Germany is carry
ing out the basic requirements of
surrender. Arrange
ments for the subsequent period will
be the subject of separate agree
ment.
Evening star., 1945-06-05
ADVERTISEMENT.
Does YOUR Dog
''SCRATCH?"
If He Does, He Is in TORMENT

happy when he must continually scratch
dig. rub and bite himself. seeking relief
from an intense itching irritation that has
He is in frenzied torment-cant help him
SELF, But you may. Try giving him, as
Powders. once each week. Note the euiet
difference. Learn why 4 glad purchas sci
wrote: Il surely was pleased, as the 25t
package helped my dog Immediately. H.
has practically quit scratching, has more
pep and his hair is glossy again" Rea
Hunters Dos Powders cost only 25c q,
Schmid's Pet Shop, 712 Twelfth St. NV.
and leading dealers everywhere. (Econ.
on1y size box for 81 90 only)
Evening star., 1945-06-05
NATC Nine Whips NRL

National Airport Transport Com
mand was slow starting but got its
attack functioning in time to blast
out 10 hits and 81 win over Naval
Research Laboratory in a District
Recreation League game. A four
run rally in the sixth climaxed the
victors' uphill fight.
Evening star., 1945-06-05
Three Lead in Victory

Pitchers Frank Darcy and Bue
Dobbert and slugger Ed McFay wer,
taking the bows today for Marine
Third Guards 6-1 victory over Ma.
val Communications Annex Thun.
derbolts yesterday. The hurlers al.
lowed only one hit each, while Nc.
Fay cracked out double and two
singles.
Evening star., 1945-06-05
THE EVENING STAR, Washington D. c. W. A-13


the English, Russian, French and
German languages. The English,
Russian and French are the only
authentic texts.
Berlin.
| 5th June. 1915.