Bradley beam., 1945-06-02
{ " [ ADVENTURES WITH A JUNIOR
 G MAN
Abstractedly Speaking


 have a devil of a time finding the line where they originally signed out. The secret, of course, is to remember the number of the page on which you put your John Hancock" All pages are lettered with red pencil-can't be missed. Since the cold sober boys had such a time we were really set for an amusing few hours when one lad rolled in slightly the worse for carousing. Imagine our surprise when he walked up to the pass book, Tipped over few pages and signed in just like that. We even checked to see whether he signed in under his own name, not be- 1ieving our eyes, and by-gad he did. Pass me the Scotch, Jason, Pm about to sign in from pass.
 World Shaking Items
 George Wolf, pride and joy of the Legal Office, has announced his intention to retire from active service. Lou Yusi of the guards, likewise. We wish them both luck but pity the civilians with G1 lawyer and GI policemen due to join their ranks. Won't be safe these days for a po'old civvy even to jay-walk. Melvin Green, PEG, back at Bradley after a year out West. Is now singing that popu- lar song: "There's Been Some Changes Made" Vern Nienow's bundle from heaven arrived during the week. (See Diaper Digest else where in this issue for pertinent facts.) .. Only five boys from G attended that Dance at the Bond in Hartford last Friday pm. but they sure were glad they went. Even yours truly managed to dig the af- fair, accompanied by Ed Kelley who left his drawing board long enough to ogle evening gowns.
 If you'll forgive us for harping on a too popular theme, we'd like to offer the following entitled
 He Didn't Die From Heat
 Pfc. Frankehobber (NM) Quag- gennkrackur, whom we'll call Quag for short, was very proud of his mental powers. Of course, he rated only 46 in his ACCT score but then he was handicapped by being ignorant. Which is a contradiction, but as writer we have no scruples. Quag decided one day that it was time he took a shower what with even his best friends avoiding him. Hot water was called for-so, be- ing as we say genius Cor did we say), he placed great deal of kindling on the hot water furnace at approximately 2330 (fguring no one wanted water after that hour) and retired, making a mental note to awaken at 0500 and bathe before the mob. At 0500, promptly, he awoke and grabbing towel and soap crept through the slumbering barracks to the washroom. He smiled with satisfaction. The room was empty. He was alone, at last, to tend to his bathing. Quickly he slipped out of his nighties (blue with cerese overtones in crepe de chene and eyelet lace in violet) and stepped into the shower room. He reached out and turned on the hot water. It was cold at first as might be expected, then slowly it warmed until hot, clean fluid splashed from it in cheerful torrents. However, Quag never got to bathe in that hot water for as he stood there, the liquid dripping from his out stretched testing hand, he went mad. Mad, stark raving mad! At O6OO he was discovered, by those who arose with the sun, lying on the washroom floor screaming and squirming and water flowed (now cold) from the hot water faucets throughout the room, almost float ing his prostrate body. In this con- dition he was found and after ex- animation by the proper authori- ties he was given a Section VIII