davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1945-01-19
One Word Led to Another
BY Linda and
Jerry Walter
BY Arthur Bugs" Baer

The draft boards getting little tougher
perfect who get spots before their eyes when
they throw box-cars.
They have lacked the age of the bottomless quota up
couple of chronological notches They putting the
triple check lads who think the essential job the
next one
That occupational draft preferment is getting bit
frngy on the edges was scout flank Conga line
until my draft board classified tilt detective for PIN
ball machines
UP until now have been as innocent as thumb
print a babys milk bottle. But my draft board is
looking at askance I'm experienced boon-doggler
from the good old days when they called spade spade
and reached for a niblck.
have brother-in-law who is smelt fisherman.
No matter what he catches it smets Well the draft
board of Local 1885, Southern Nova Scotia sent for him
and told him he had to work fight get married and
do both.
Well, he is the only in this country who
clean bird cage without frightening the canary.
They said he would discover thing they would defer
him is years hand running Here is what they wanted
to know, why is there always better crust the
library paste than there is on the apple pe?"
The next door is expert who taps on car
wheels. He says if you didn't know how to fit square
peg in round hole you would win game of
crbbage The draft board he must find essential
job but they don't specify essential to what So he
dunks balls for retired colonies with the Iceland stare
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1945-01-19
BY Damon
Runyon

skill and a stern puncher and in
my opinion he would have been
the equal of Joe Louis in a
contest when they were both
amateurs.
TT WAS Bill Mcclellan, come
Il TO think of il. who used TO
like. to get Eddie Eagan in a
back room of well snowed-in
little tavern at Lake Placid
after the rigors Of competition
of the day, seat Edward in a
chair and say:
"Now Eddie, you are coming
out of White Face. Bob"
And Eddie would bob with
great vigor as his imaginary
sled would round the wholly
fanciful dangerous turn far up
the mountain slope. and at the
conclusion of his journey he and
Mcclellan would have another
jorum of cider.
But all that is a long time
ago and perhaps I should not
bring up such incidents in the
life and works of one who now
has reached the lofty eminence
of boxing commissioner.
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1945-01-19
Z. ". DURLTNG

cialIy after the great epic Of
Arnheim."
QUERIES from clients:
VI New York isn't what II
used TO be, is it,
A-No, sir. hardly anything
remains the same except the
Brooklyn Bridge and the price
Of a ride on the subway. When
there's skating In the park they
don't even put the red ball up on
the streetcarS. Beer IL Is cents
a glass. There are no cOlOrfuI
press agents like Harry Reichen-
bach. No picturesque boxers
such as Battling Sikh, the singu-
lar Sengalese who strOlled down
Broadway wearing AN opera
cloak and n high hat and leading
n leopard on leash. Most shows
that are hits now would have
been errors In the yesteryear.
Reporters live in the suburbs
and raise chickens or grow
dahlias. The bartenders put
grease on their hair and strive
90 be heart-throbs for the lady
patrons. City editors are writ
ing books. All the models are
married. The public used to
bawl the mayor out, but now it's
vice versa.
A MAN apprehended buying
"A goods he knows has been
stolen is tossed into the jug.
But when a man is caught buy
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1945-01-19
Mary HAWORTH'S MAIL

DEAR L. B.:
VOUR attachment TO this
i friend is morbidly excessive;
and calculated by it's unwhole-
some nature TO disturb and Of
fend the sensibilities OF the girl
and her husband.
II appears you have been
making something Of a pest OF
yourself in continuing, rather
frantically, 10 bid with almost
loverlike srdor for center
front position in her thoughts
and personal affairs.
Doubtless you have meant
well enough. But the truth II
that In a foolish, forlorn, in
sistent sort Of way you have
been behaving almost as a rival
10 her husband-if we may
Judge by the fondlY proprietary
way in which you pushed your
self TO the fore during her III
ness and by your gift OF a
beautiful watch on her birthday.
The gift, by the way, vas
rather too expensive and too
intimate in character, according
10 tradition, 10 be in good taste
or readily acceptable, when
thrust on married woman by
a worshipful girl friend.
Thus. one can understand why
her husband wouldn't care for
you or your peculiar muscling-in.
And now that she is turning
q Very cold shoulder IN you. one
can imagine that he is AZ last
completely fed up. and has in
dignsntly ordered her 10 put
stop 10 your bothersome pur-
suit Of her. AS for what 10 do.
flake the hint and stop modest
ing her with unwanted atten-
tons. NJ. II.
EDITORS NOTE=Mry Ha-
north eounssL through her cole
unn; not BY mail or psrsensi
interview. Write her IN care Of
The Detroit Times.
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1945-01-19

1-Since there are 10 women's
magazines and magazines APP
pealing primarily TO women,
quite a proportion of which deal
in sensationalism, compared to
one magazine for men, which
are just a bit risque or made
of mostly Of comedy and satire.
/ think a census would surely
show that more women than
men read sensational literature.
The love story and confession
magazines are read chiefly by
women, particularly the stories
of a glamorouS, sensational
type.
2-One large research has
shown that two-thirds OF the
high school Freshmen ex-
anlined believed In ouija boards;
Sc per cent believed mothers
could birthmark their children
by fright. or make them must
cal by playing and singing be-
fore their birth; 20 per cent
believed in taking spring
tonics" 10 thin the blood ,
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1945-01-19

fight II. II was their attitude,
more than anything else. which
irritated the powers that be.
THE Woolworth Donahues' re-
Il cent dates have the Mayfair
set with their eyebrows UP TO
here. They are devoted pals
and date often TO stifle the so-
called friends who gossip about
million-dollar settlement rumors.
They want intimates 10 know
they have no intention Of di-
vorcing-merely separated
Merely?
Some N. Y. night spot con-
cessionaires have hired press
agents to keep stories out OF the
gazettes.
The nude girl in one OF Dizzy
Dali's paintings was posed by
Pamela Drake. who doesn't
look like il, at all.
Hildegarde's radio rating Conly
IS weeks on the air) is a shock
TO her belittlers. Plenty high.
I'm Columbia's Thousand and
One Nights. reports Evelyn
Reyes exploiter. "she will ride
an elephant instead OF a white
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1945-01-19
BETTER HEALTH
BY DR.. Logan Clendening-

watch the embryo grow cell by
cell. the heart appears as a PIN
point of alternate white and
red-and a lovely sight II is too
until, finally, a Uniformed chick
covered with down and legs and
everything emerges.
ONE OF the vivid passages OF
" DR.. Corners book is his de-
scription OF the placenta and the
interchange of chemical and nu-
tritional elements betwee
mother and developing child.
The placenta is part of the child
attached TO the mothers uterus
into which il sends little fingers
called will consisting OF an fngo-
ing and outgoing blood vessel.
Dr.. Corner illustrates the
properties OF these Will by taxi
ing A sausage casing and filling
il with some indelible ink and
then hanging il in a beaker Of
water. None OF the ink ever
left the sausage casing. but IL
he added salt solution, il imne-
dIately got out into the sur
rounding water. The will are
Selective IN what they let pass
in the same way.
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1945-01-19
WASHINGTON Scene
By George Dixon

IN a couple Of days, we will be-
4 inauguraung a president and
vice president Of the United
States. II will be quite a cere-
mony and, If you are in the
neighborhood, don't hesitate 10
drop in
There will be no trick 10 gain
ing admission. A few simple
qualifications Will suffice
The easiest way TO crash. 81
course, IS 10 be either the PreSi-
dent or the vice president OF the
United States, although / would
not entirely vouch for the latter.
But II you are neither-whlch
seems likely-there are other
ways.
You can be a New Deal con-
gresham. Or member OF the
cabinet. Or a top-ranking am
baSsador. Or Felix Frankfurter.
Or you can be Jimmy ByTnes.
On second thought. maybe
you'd better not be Jimmy
Byrnes because hear he and
the President are not speaking
and you wouldn't want 10 60
busting in on a fellow you
weren't speaking to, would you?
II you are none OF these
things, not even a Frankfurter.
don't feel mustered out mote:
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1945-01-19

gag) there IS still one more
chance You can be q member
OF the $1,000 club.
The club is made UP of loyal
d en- ocrats who contributed
$1,000 10 the ROOSEVELT Truman
campaign This well-invested
grand entities you 10 a ducat.
NOW, before you go belly
~ aching that II is hardly
worth $1,000 just 10 see the
President and vice president
get slapped over the prov with
a champagne bottle. let me tell
you there are literally thou
sands OF suckers-I mean sup
plicants-who would pay double,
if not triple.
In fact, / read in one Of the
local society columns there
hasn't been such an orgy of
wire-pulling for invitations since
the garden party Of Britain's
king and queen back in June
1899.
This was a festival given by
Sir Ronald and Lady Lindsay,
the latter Of whom was sus-
pected of being the British am
bassador. The way our best
people fought and truckled Just
10 wear their joints out curtsy-
ing before the royal visitors
was a scandal.
l was present myself-but
only because l won my invita-
ton in a rsffle.
I WAS congratulating myself
Il on winning one of the tickets
when the shock came. was in
formed we would have to wear
cutaway coats and striped
pants
l wired my office which sent
a fellow out TO buy same. from
guess measurements. The stuff
was waiting when we hit Wash
ington. In addition 10 the silk
hat, coats, pants, etc. there were
two waiStcoats-a gray one for
garden parties and a black one
for Tammany funerals.
Well, / struggled into this
mess, which fitted here and
there, and set out for the brawl
II was a blistering June day and
! didn't feel any better when q
group Of raffle-losing colleagues
accosted me outside the EN-
bassy and howled.
"Remember-at midnight you
must unmask"
You've never witnessed a mob
scene like that party. The big
gest and best known in our land
pushed, showed. and scrambled
to get peek at Britannia's
rulers like kids fighting to feed
peanuts to the elephant.
Now we're going to have an
other stampede, but F. d. r.
and Truman say they won't
wear striped pants, and that we
of the press don't have 10 either.
I am very glad. My outfit smells
horrid from moth balls.
Distributed BY Kint Features synd Inc.
Reproduction In vhois 81 h part
strictly prohfnatsA
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1945-01-19
w ~ ruzu, VXIuNYCuuuzu On
w AZ II GAe W AANOAAAIA-A~ Broadway

steed. because she is allergic TO
horses" Some of us, as the
gag went, are allergic to ma
larky.
THOSE Of us who gather news
Il often have 10 wait long
time 10 see some OF 1t con-
firmed.
About year ago we an
nounced that unless more nurses
volunteered there might be q
draft OF nurses.
Some legislators and others
screamed back denials. Moth
ing TO IT," they told newspapers.
which echoed IL.
Mail came in punches from
irate listeners who demanded TO
know why such "unfounded and
baseless" reports were made
which frightened people need
lessly.
All we tried 10 do was report
the news in advance.
II took almost year TO see
il confirmed.
Mai. Gen. Kirk did so on
Jan. s. and the President con-
firmed US both on Jan. 9Th.
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1945-01-19
On the
Side

ing black market goods only
the seller is punished. That is
not justice. Furthermore, IL
certainly is not the way 10
eliminate the black market.
what IL o. dogie ?" asks a
San Antonio subsc Der. He
must be a Johnny-Come-L Lately
In Texas.
According 10 the accepted
western definition: "A dogie Is a
little calf that has lost It's ma
and pa"
HTNHE reason 20 many girls
Il prefer middle-aged men as
escorts IL not, as often claimed,
due to the man shortage" writes
young woman of Chicago.
"Middle-aged escorts were on
the preferred list before the
war. The reason Is that men I'm
their fortles are moro consider
ate, courteous and appreciative
than young men. The young
fellows act ~ IL they are doing
the girl a favor by taking her
out. ("
(Note-Keep that in mind,
young fellow. Be appreciative.
incidentally, many young fell
lows say the reason some girls
prefer middle-aged escorts is
because that type of man gen.
orally has more money 10 spend
than young man,
Distributed by King Features synd.. Inc.
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1945-01-19

DR. GEORGE w. CORNER is
~ one OF the est-diStin--
fished of American anatomists.
ytrictly speaking, he Is ar en-
bryologist. which cans he
studies the anatomy Of animals
as they unfold before they are
born. In a recent book. Our
selves .Unborn" yale University
Press, he presents in a series
of lectures for laymen some OF
the problems of his science.
I don't know why such work
was never done before. When |
think OF the I housan $ OF
women now sitting IN rocking
chairs wondering what under
the shining stars IL going on in
side them and all they get IS 10
pe foid not 10 worry. TO hem
stitch 200 diapers, drink plenty
OF milk and think beautiful
thoughts, ! cannot see why some
enterprising author did not long
ago think of such a presentation
rs DR.. Corners.
ZACH OF US begins as single
II cell which weighs about fif-
teen ten-millionths Of a gram.
A. birth. II we are seven-pound
babies. we weigh $3.50 gram.
But what set Of multiplied
tons and windings and turnings
occur before that blessed event!
On the whole II turns out sur
prisingly. not 10 say aStonlSh-
incly we'll. Considering every
thing that could 60 wrong, the
number Of nishapS is in the
very low decimal figures. And
certainly DR.. Corner would
agree that taking thought does
not influence the event, and
knowledge a b out il does not
make a great deal Of difference
in the outcome. But neither
does knowledge hurt. This book
should be Of immense interest
both TO the expectant mother.
and let US include that neglected
nd shadowy figure, the expec-
INT father.
Most of what we know on the
subject has been learned from
the study Of the lower animals.
but such information as we have
received from time 10 time
about man indicates that there
Is no real difference in the fun
damental processes.
The youngest human embryo
ever studied was obtained by
Boston surgeon. DR.. John Rock.
In 1912. II was believed 10 be
about IN days old The difficult
ties in the way of getting such
early ones are obvious. The
hen is the embryologists real
pal. He can get an egg from
under her before she has
emitted her first a k-le and
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1945-01-19
WARRANT OFFICER e. J.

WARRANT OFFICER E. ].
w KAHN JR. formerly on
The New Yorker) weds WAC
1t Virginia Rice shortly. She
will remain in the army.
Add rackets; Phones in Flor
ida are bringing as high as $500
Nch from people who lost theirs
a the armed forces a year ago.
The mobs are set TO run the
bookmaking in Mexico and Ha-
Vana.
They had been figuring on the
tracks suffering disaster for
more than a year.
Sidney Kingsley dashed off a
five-page scenario in 80 min
utes, for which Zanuck paid him
$50, 900. More than 1000 smack
ers per minute.
Though war plant absentee
ism was a contributing factor,
the Washington grapevine is
saying that the main reason for
closing the tracks was this:
Congress was preparing to stick
a 10 per cent tax on the mu-
fuels, and the track owners tin
stead of cooperating gladly in
view OF the fortunes they've
garnered lately) made ready TO
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1945-01-19
IvT..u, XX1Auu N w RCxuCxxy By Maj Gen. David
HE w ORLD ~ k0ES IL w Prescott Barrews

a co-ordinated movement upon
the Confederacy.
Grant did this, not by issuing
general orders, but by what are
called "directives."
Thereby he originated tech
nique of supreme command that
shortly after was adopted by
Won Moltke in the war between
Prussia and Austria.
GRANT and Sherman were
VI natives of the same state,
Ohio.
They we're educated in the
same military academy; had
served in the same army; had
both retired into civilian life.
an experience which may have
heightened their value.
Both were products of the
American west.
Their understanding of one
was complete.
Friendship between Eisen-
hover and Montgomery is even
more remarkable.
Eisenhower is a typical west
ern American, born in northern
Texas.
Montgomery is a Scot, with
all the martial quality of his
race.
Coming from widely sepa-
rated fields of duty, they first
met on the barren sands and
amid the palm-planted Gases Of
North Africa.
Thus their trust Of one an
other is even more remarkable
than that of Grant and Sher-
man. 81
Both are fated to be heroes
of their nations.
They deserve more than this
the joint admiration of the
two great nations which have
combined TO produce them.
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1945-01-19
Brain Game Answers

Lots wife.
2-Old peach baskets.
3-Michelangelo.
%False. 1t means that they
turn or grow in the direction
of the sun.
5-Lauren Bacall.
6-Western.
TT Dream of jeanne" Foster;
la Paloma," Yradier; Song
of India" Rimsky-Korsakov
Prelude in c Sharp Minor"
Rachmaninoff.
S-Eugene Field.
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1945-01-19

took care OF her aged mother
the entire time.
Later. gave her beautiful
watch for her birthday.
know her husband doesn't
like me any too well, but ! have
always been nice TO him.
l love her as If she were my
own sister, and II breaks my
heart 10 have her treat me with
indifference. Please advise me
what 10 do. l.. Ii.
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1945-01-19

I'm FARLEY told the story at
y my table in the kitchen of
Moore's restaurant the other
night.
(By the way. Jim consumed
two orders of corned beef and
cabbage like breaking sticks
while sitting there. Is this sabo-
tage?)
When he was chairman Of the
New York State Athletic Com
mission, the governing body of
the art of mussing mugs, ne was
standing in the lobby of Madison
Square Garden one fight night
with his fellow member OF the
commission, the redoubtable
William Muldoon.
Along came William O. Nc
Geehan, then writing Of the box
ing commissioners in his column
in the Herald Tribune as The
Three Dumb Duke" with a
humor that had the whole town
laughing at them.
Farley. as smoo h against
newspaper assault as sc a !
against water, was very friendly
with Mcclellan who stopped at
the sight of Jim and shook
hands.
GCOMM oNER Null
~ doom, have you ever met
Bill McGeehsn:" Farley asked,
turning to the old Spartan. a
man of lordly demeanor, humor-
less and grim. McGeehan's title,
"the Iron Duke" fitted him well.
What Mcclellan" demanded
Muldoon, glaring at Bill. "Are
YOU THE McGeehan?"
my name Is Mcclellan" said
Bill quietly,
Then Mcclellan you are
" roared Muldoon, the
language something rare for him.
Mcclellan bowed slightly from
his waist TO the old gentleman
and with a smile that Farley
still recalls as family ironic,
walked away leaving the Iron
Duke" red-faced with embar-
rassment over his momentary
loss of dignity.
After Farley went on TO be-
come president-maker and
Muldoon passed away, came
John J. Phelan, incredibly
enough manufacturer of bras
sieres. TO the boxing commission
and of the nice old general and
his business and his mala-
propisms, big Dan Parker.
sports writer quite in MCGEE
hans class as humorist, made
merriment.
DARKER'S public got many a
Il chuckle out of his chronicles
Of the sayings and doings of
Gen. Phelan though I noticed
that in the last few years of
the generals IL on the commits
sion, Dan dealt with him in
kindly mood. He indicated
great respect for the generals
honesty even in his bumblingest
moments.
Now the general has departed
through the exigencies of poll
tics and new type has come
10 the boxing commission in the
person Of Eddie Eagan. an old
friend Of mine from my old
home state of Colorado. ! think
Eddie was the greatest anna
teur boxer l ever saw. He was
q light heavyweight, Of superior
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1945-01-19
Detroit Times Rationing Timetable
GASOLINE

a Cospcr 49, gallons. valid throuIh
March 81,
rs and &C Coupens-s fsllons each.
B-a and &C Ceupons-s gallons each.
Law requires state name and license
nurnber b written On every coupon
when received
full OIL
Periods 4, and s-vslio throuEh sept
so
sHOTs
Airplsns STAMPS q. ana t-valid
indefnitely.
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1945-01-19

LIQUOR
We. tr-vtlid hrourh Jan. 81,
YROCrssED FOODS
Blue Ks throaEh G-1-vand indeh-
nitely.
MATS, CHIEsE FATS
he'd o-a throssb x-a-Valid lndehnitsly.
one To SALVAGE fat rood for 4 cents
ard tvo meat ration pointt.
SUGAR
atamp n, neak A-Valh inoehnitsly.
A nev stamp valid Teb. for nouths
probably.
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1945-01-19
DEAR MARY HAWORTH:

T HAVE a girl friend, now
married, whom I had always
considered my very best friend.
But In the past month, she has
been acting very distant toward
me.
In September she had a very
serious operation. and while she
was in the hospital I sent her
flowers, visited her often, and
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1945-01-19
Connolly Answers

Answers: 1--(c), 2-(c), s.
(b). 4-(a), 5-(b). 6-(a)
Bluebells, (b) Thistles. (c)
Rose, I'D Sage, (e) Rose.
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1945-01-19

This may not represent all high
school freshmen, but since these
children were reared in a very
cultivated community, il is GER
tainly a discouraging sample.
3-No. Without habits we
would be like an engine with
out a governor or flywheel. No
one could live with US. because
even we ourselves could not
predict what we would do next.
William James said. nothing is
more annoying than the person
who has no fixed habits.
Personaiity-the priceless gift
Because OF the great interest
readers have indicated in this
subject. there is now available
a supply OF the famous book
let. How 10 Deve lop Your
Personality by Saddle Myers
Shellow, Pm. u. Send 10 cents
and stampe self-sddressed
envelope. Address Or. Wiggarn,
care this newspaper.
THE DETROIT TIMES els
l0Ir
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1945-01-19

TTIE tie between Eisenhower
L and Montgomery is the
most valuable factor TO the
success Of our armies and the
whole Allied cooperation.
Such trust and friendship be-
tween two great soldiers is as
rare as il is moving.
The relationship between
these American and British
commanders is like that of
Grant and Sherman in our own
Civil War.
When, late in 1868. President
Lincoln appointed Grant TO the
supreme command of all Union
armies. there were a half dozen
fronts and as many separate
armies and commanders, whose
efforts Grant had TO unite for
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1945-01-19

cred himself Of what he had in
his mind.
His first outbreak was per-
haps the most important.
1t was a scathing rebuke TO
those Allied correspondents and
newspapers which have endeav-
ored to undermine Eisenhower's
reputation and authority: try
ing. as Montgomery phrased it,
ito get the captain of our team,
Gen. Ike" Il am devoted to
him; we are great friends" he
said.
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1945-01-19

ITO THE London, Eng. Daily
l. Mirror a fighting man has
written AS follows:
AS a private In the para
troops, I get two shillings a day
jumping pay out of which l am
required by law to pay IL pence
income tax. Surely parachute
pay should be tax free, espe-