The midland journal., 1945-10-05

THE NE MAkANG CAkSS AGAAN!
(''Firss New Model Car Rolls OF Pro-
duction ine."-Headline.)
Hail, Queen
Debutante Of the Det0urs,
Emblem Of the future,
Omen Of traffic jams to come,
Reminder Of happier days,
First new model since '42l
-
Sister you look swell!
They've changed your shape again.
No lady could stand that operation
So often and stand 1t as you do.
You look better from the front. ;.
And the rear view amt any worse.
Them auto engineers
Understand beauty treatments. =.
You're burned purity!
Yowsir! Gl0bal War Cert
Was superdO0per.
She did more than was hoped for.
She amazed the engineers,
Stunned the owners
And flabbergasted the service sta
ShVhos
She even outdid the advertising
writer's!
She helped win a war,
She was in there punchin' always,
And there's many fight in the old
gal yet.
Lissen, Babe Of 1945-46. -.
If you can hold a candle to Cert
You'll do!
THE BASEBALL FANS TO A
LOSING CLUB
lin the japanese manner
To the Club Owners, Managers,
Pitchers and All.
Gents:
Being as how our club has turned
out to be one of the worst clubs in
history, taking last place at the start
of the season and holding it nobly
to the finish, we, the fans, now pros
trate ourselves before you in deep
humility and boundless sorrow
-
The pitching was sandlot stuff, the
fielding would not stand up in the
One-Eye League, the longest hit of
the year was two Dagger on open
ing day and the management should
of stood in bed. All of which hurts
us deeply on account Of we fully un-
derstand that we alone were respon-
sible. We had nothing to say about
the batteries, the schedule, the
strategy or the coaching. All we did
was to pay In and show we could
take it. This was a rare privilege
and we are to blame for every
thing.
In this hour Of disappointment and
chagrin we apologize, especially to
his August Presence, Tim Maloney,
the manager, to their Imperial
Majesties Cunnihan & Jones, club
owners, to pitchers CAM, Snaffu and
Crummie for the lousy season and
for the fact the club wound up In
last place. 1t tears our hearts out
when we think of what they must
be suffering.
With bowed heads and with tears
streaming from our eyes we accept
full responsibility for every lost
game, wild throw, error and strike
out, trusting that the club owners,
manager and players will be noble
spirited enough to forgive us.
We know that the star pitcher
"Lefty" Bizzle, every time he was
picked and sent In to pitch against
anybody, proclaimed himself as a
man of peace, and opposed going
through with the game at all. Never
at any time in the season did he
really want to pitch. In the high
nobility of his patchless spirit
and love for the team and the fans
he always cried, "Include me out Of
this" Losing every fight by scores
of from 18 to 80 to he was ever
an exponent Of brotherly love.
The club owners, the managers
and the coaches also showed In
their matchIess benevolence they
were for harmony and understand
ing. And so 1t Is with deep sincerity
that we apologize for having ever
caused them to think seriously Of .
winning baseball team. In the dust
on our knees we express our pro-
found sorrow for all the worries we
have caused them.
In ALI Humility,
The Cash Customers.
P.S.-We also think the outfit,
especially that bum who struck out
with the bases full, should now con-