The Wyandotte news-herald. (Wyandotte, Mich.) 1943-1963, 1944-10-30
by
strauss
gantz
Guest Columnisf
Mrs. G..

I don't know why I let myself get
talked into these things -. For
one thing I'm not a writer
and for another I can't type. But
already I've caught on. Half the
battle is pushing the key that makes
the
Whsn the guy you're married 70
comes down with beaut OF cold
and insists it's the least you
can do after he's supported
YOU for ten years and one day.
you're stuck. There's nothing
in our marriage contract that says
must do this but he gives me
a dirty look and retires to bed.
All me, ten years! Hoover prom
ised a chicken in every pot, but
Strauss did him one better. He
promised to keep me in riches. My
hands have been scrubbing with
Gold Dust ever since. We met in the
East on Long Island ia
nous for ducks Note to Chamber
of Commerce: Also for "clucks."
But being married to a newspa-
perman has its bright side. Free
passes to the theatre and lots
of newspapers around the house to
line the garbage can. And never q
drffi rnrrsrs, They vs)-e vnu M IN
the middle of the night to tell
you that Joe Doakes just beat up
his wife but he's sorry for 1t
and please leave it out of the
paper. They call you from The Tap
Room and Schroeder's to tell
YOU who to promote for Mayor and
Council. They tell you where the
fires are as If he could put
them out. They tell you your hus-
bands wonderful and they
also tell you he's louise.
Years Of watching Strauss write a
column has convinced me that the
limo that separates sanity from in
sanity Is very thin. used to think
writer's had to go into Information
so they could concentrate. Not
50 with him. He's at his best when
Bob Hope Is on the radio when
our Indian Is hammering nails &.
and he doesn't really get going until
he has o sandwich in one hand {.
and another one coming up. I've
often wondered if he adds those
sandwiches to his expense account.
He likes to write his column in
the kitchen near the refrig-
orator. On days there is nothing to
eat in the house the column
reads worse than usual. His pub
fishers would be money ahead if they
hired o cook to tag after him.
There should be some news in this
column for change. Rum
maging through his notes I see
where Idaho is now famous for two
things potatoes and a
Marriage Club located in the
town Of Juliaetta. Just my luck. Ten
years too late!
He's got an item about Charlie
swaby going to the football game
and returning to find his
home ransacked. Something about
lots Of War Bonds stolen and
a piggy bank with $25. In our house
the piggy bank Is ransacked regu-
larly the nights he plays poker.
He was also going to name the
assailant who gave severe beating
to one Lucien Charette. I've never
yet figured out just how his grape
vine works.
Here's O note about a woman on
Ford avenue who had her home
ransacked over the weekend. Police
want TO question her daughter, Lii
who doesn't live there any
more.
Claude Fitzgerald should fit in
this column somehow. Seems he
showed up In court during the
Holton case. Judge Decker has given
Mr.. Fitzgerald the job of finding a
home for the Holtons and
their three children In the mean
time they were put on six months
probation for contributing to the
delinquency of their. kiddies.
And here are tumble of notes
about the John Gygecocyk case
Something about the whole thing
being muffed. Seems the man is
charged with four counts of arson
). and at the time of the fire nc
one bothered to call the State Fire
MaT1l,a1 which Is the usual
procedure when arson is suspected
He has something written down
about the Fire Chief and the Assist
(COntinued on page o.