The midland journal. (Rising Sun, Md.) 1885-1947, 1944-02-25
Possible File by Mr.. Jones.

official report.
Possible File by Mr.. Jones.
1854 "a. Hitler) All inquiries
and observations regarding this par
ty indicate he is through as big
time competitor. He doesn't even
talk a good game today. Now
changes his stance frequently, wig
giles the club too much, yells con-
stantly for quiet when addressing
the ball and hits from outside in.
Recently used a putter to get ball
out of a mudhole, on 'hunch." Lost
II holes in an 18-hole match the
other day and called it successful
disengagement according to plan.
Should not be taken seriously in
class competition. ....
-
3582-B (Goering) Now takes out
five or six clubs before deciding
which one to use. Has shifted from
wood to irons ON driving tees in the
argument that he would rather keep
straight than get distance. Keeps
talking about a super club he used
to have. Has shortened backswing
SO much it resembles preparation for
a six-foot putt. Very irritable on
the greens. Some idea Of his state Of
mind can be obtained from the fact
he recently tried wearing medals on
his golf pants to see il they gave
him more confidence that way. No
luck.
1920 (Goebbels). - Now puts
with a clipper, approaches with a
driver and tries a spoon in traps.
Constantly complains there is some
thing wrong with the ball. Took nine
puts on a green the other day and
delivered long harangue claiming
that in spirit and morale he was
stronger than ever.
Is trying to drive with the left
hand but that's no good either.
-
3330-H (Himmler) Still thinks he
can win by hanging his competitors,
shooting the caddies and burning
the scorecards. Is so nervous now
that he won't even come to the first
tee without his personal firing squad.
THOUGHTS ON A JET PLANE
The jet plane intrigues us. 1t is
q cross between an airplane, a sky
rocket and comet, with an instru-
ment board. It is quantity produc-
ton meteor.
Science and engineering are NOV
ing too fast. BY the time a pilot
gets any new plane back from
test fight it's old-fashioned. It had
become obsolete in midair.
-
This Jet plane strikes us as some
thing born Of nightmare, the thrill
er-diller funnies and the radio hair
raisers. 1t is a hot fame with pas
senger accommodations.
-
Man is ceasing to be man and
is becoming Roman candle,
piece of fireworks, a skyrocket with
a hat and coat.
A speed of 500 or 800 miles an
hour is promised by jet planes.
That's travelling, as the seagun
chirped as he went through the wind
shield of a runaway bus going in
the opposite direction.
-
You can't visualize such speed
unless you have seen a man chase
his hat through q wind-tunnel on
roller skates.
It's faster than sound. A pilot
gets to his destination before he
hears his orders and gets back be-
fore the echo has been verified.
-
It has no propellers. They would
only get in the wayl
"It's all done by gas" explained
Elmer Twitchell, the well-known avi-
ator engineer, pinochle shark and
stamp collector, today. eyes, sir,
all done by gas and air pressures,
with black magic, and live sparks
thrown in"
'T have just made fight in one,"
said Elmer, who looked pretty
scared. "At least, that's what the
doctors told me it was"
-
81 just stepped in" he exclaimed.
''the skipper touched button and
presto-I was going so fast that ra-
dio messages had to move to the
right to let faster moving vehicles
pass"
"Just what's to be gained?" We
asked. 'sThe other fellow Is bound
to get O-mile-an-hour plane. too"