Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1944-08-01
FAIR
ENOUGH
BY Westbrook
Peeler

NEW YORK. Aug. IL have
A' just come away from the
Mirror and what do you know?
The Republicans nominated the
wrong man in Chicago.
Height six feet something.
weight 4sa, eiean-shanenre except
on week-ends, with a distin-
guished touch of gray at the
temples, gay. witty, popular,
lovable and just the right age,
so next month. if not any too
bright.
So they had to pick a little
guy with an eyebrow mustache
with not a gray hair in his head
and serious preoccupation
with the problems of national
government who doesn't try TO
WOW them with gags at his
press conference and won't be
43 until after election.
These deficiencies are being
exploited rather Importantly
against Mr.. Dewey who doubt
less will be called Tom Thumb
before long if he hasn't been So
called already and some OF the
objections from the direction
OF Sidney Hillman's Commu-
mist Front are enough 10 make
a person check back to make
sure whether our fellow is
candidate for the presidency or
the police department.
THEY are particular about
such things in the cops.
Their minimum height would
disqualify Mr.. ID. and l doubt
that he could bring himself up
10 weight though he got awash
with water and bananas. a
sly resort of border-line aspi-
rants just before reporting for
their physical examinations.
Mr.. Roosevelt, by contrast, is
a big, limousine job. above six
feet even now. and back in the
early twenties when he ran for
vice president there were fight
managers in town who would
have been glad to take him
over. knock five years off his
age and throw him in there for
a shot at the heavyweight title.
4 MOTHER one who outscores
"A Mr.. d. in height, stance and
looks is poor old Paul MCNutt,
who has found himself behind
the eight ball ever since Mr..
Big got elected in 1882
There is nice guy who. by
force of circumstances. was
compelled 10 waste his own
chances serving the career OF
the very man who blocked his
own ambition.
Mr.. McNutt Is picture poll
tician and one OF his old man
ayers admitted back around Sc
that he was practically all looks
but was figuring 10 do lot
with him just the same.
I DON'T want 10 be dirty 10
L the Communists. but If IL
comes TO "a matter of height
and the way a candidate land
SsepeS his lip in this campaign.
/ wonder how they figure on
Squaring themselves with their
boss. Because Little Joe isn't
any taller standing up than
Roosevelt is sitting down,
He put on long pants for the
first time when he went 10
Teheran and before that he AL
ways wore stoveplpe boots
which. as any military styhst
will tell you. are used more 10
create an illusion of height than
TO ward off rattlers.
Ihey certainty must he affec-
tation or vanity in a man with a
desk job such as Joe's because
they are hard 10 get on and off
and they murder your feet.
SO, If Dewey had 10 sit on a
dictionary 70 see over that big
desk in Albany. Stain could
keep house in a drawer OF the
same desk and LaGuardia
couldn't get into the chair with
out a ladder.
This is a hell OF big desk.
built just for show. SulLer was
the last governor to use IT,.
Anyway. the commies should
be the last TO rib Mr.. d. about
his size. That Hillman, him
self. is no Camera and moreover
they are always hollering up
their great love for the little
people of the u. S. A. This
sounds as though they are
against little guys.
Copyright, 1915 by United FEATURE, HVnd