The Michigan chronicle. [volume] (Detroit, Mich.) 1936-current, 1944-05-06
THE FACTS
~ OUR NEWS

IhE ADOLESCENI AND HIS
PARENTS At first blush. such
title for Q weekly newspaper
columnist may seem strange to the
casual reader. AS We go q little
bit further into our subject, II can
be easily seen that young people
and their parents are news.
Spring Is upon rs with all Of Its
exhiliratins power and creative In
fluences. Spring and summer are
the gift of God to parents and
their children. This magnificent
gift has in Il the possibilities Of
destruction and the possibilities Of
creatveness. IL Is difficult TO ap-
preciate the possibilities for crea-
tiveness without marking out clear
ly the possibilities Of destruction.
The forces for giving life and mean
ing to either creativeness or de-
struction are within the parent and
the child.
Adolescent young people always
bob between two poles of feeling
in their effort 10 grow up and to
take responsibility for their actions
This idea needs repeating in an
other way. Young people expert
ence the most overwhelming desire
to be free from the authority OF
their parents at one time, and re-
gress or 60 back to an almost sick
ening degree Of wanting to be
looked after. cared for and babied
by that same parent. In planning
with young people, these two ideas
are the central things to be kept
In mind. II q parent Is immature,
threatened and guilty about his re-
lati0nship to his children, he can
not understand q child who seeks
to be independent Of him. Such
parent will interpret this effort on
the part of the adolescent or grow
ing child as child's lack Of ap-
probation and respect for the par
ents position. Nothing Of the kind
Is true In the majority of cases.
1t is part OF the growing up pro-
cess to seek freedom from parental
authority. When a child fails to
seek this freedom and to exercise
what freedom he does have, the |
child is not developing normally |
and -then-the- parent~has- cause for
fear and concern. This does not |
mean, however. that the parent |
should 20 along making less effec- I
tive his authority. nor does 1t mean
that q parent seeks to impose more
authority on an adoIescent because
he Is trying to get away from par
entail authority. In other words,
the parents responsibility for ex-
ercising authority Is just rs man.
datory In his Relationship with his
child when the child seeks TO get
away from him as when the child
looks for the authority Of the parent
and asks for II. Even though an
adoleScent seeks 10 free himself
rom parental authority as he seeks
o stay out late. go TO any party
discrimination and select
his friends without using much
discretion. the adolescent or grow
ng child is lost and left dangling
n mid-air when parents withdraw
heir authority and their RESPONSE
,ility because youngsters are seek
ng freedom from parental authori-
y. An adolescent must feel, even
n his struggle to get away from
authority, the emotional
irmness underneath him that can
,nly be given by parents who really
what Is happening in
, child who Is trying to get away
rom parental authority. 1t is
nothing less than cruelty to the
,hild when a parent out Of his
and his desire to be
worshipped at every step OF the
way by the child recedes from
MS child because that child mani
tests a desire to be free from par
entail authority.
Young people commit all sorts |
of delinquencies and nonsensical |
acts in their effort to grow up I'M
less they are guided and sustained
by parents who are aware OF what |
is happening. Spring offers great
err opportunity for young people
to exercise this effort to break
away from parental authority.
Therefore, parents must be sure
that they do not recede or go away
from their children as they sense
this strong desire on the part OF
their children to be free OF their
authority.
The adolescent makes this great
thrust forward away from authori-
ty, and in the same afternoon or
same week this same youngster re-
coils, seeking . protective parental
arm. He doesn't want to be free;
he does not want to make his de-
cisions and be responsible for the
results. He seeks to have mother
and father take the responsibility.
He wants them to be his protectors.
II mother and father fail at this
point because they have been hurt
by the former attitude of the childs
to get away from their authority,
they thrust the child away from
them into the world with no pro-
lection. The child then may find
himself stealing. acting rowdy, be-
coming enmeshed in premature
sex activity and drinking. in order
to receive attention, 10 feel wanted
and a part of something. In other
words, parents can Illustrate a child
IL they do mott know and how TO
handle a child's desire to break
away from authority. and his de-
sire TO be babied and protected at
tho same time. Our children too
often are the victims of delinquent
acts because they have to seek in
undesirable places what they want
from US, and we do not give be-
cause we have not taken the time
to learn how.
Use ham or bacon rind water for
Cabbage Soup stock. Cook n pound of