davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1944-08-24
By Damon
Runyon

GLIDING their wives-or are
wives people?
Curiously enough, the men
who had done the most for peo-
pie in this world were not dis
posed to association with people
IN the maSS-QH- the contrary,
they gave people the old wisk-
broom treatment.
IT is my opinion that the
L American who did more for
people than any other man in
the past so years was John d.
Rockefeller, and he bothered
not at all with people. He
avoided them. ! would be in
clined TO doubt that he loved
them. l see no reason why he
should. Yet he was one OF the
all-time great benefactors of
people. And now l suppose you
are waiting for me 10 round up
that third guy Of the trio
mention above
Well. as l afterwards learned,
this guy was arrested once for
smuggling A neighbor who COM
planned about his dog. Toots.
barking all night. The neighbor
could not sleep. Then my man
was arrested on three different
occasions for kicking people on
the Shins in box office and ra-
tion board lines, two Of his VIC
Tins being women and the third
a blind man.
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1944-08-24

or with the info / suggest above
as proof of its authenticity.
Let me tell you something. I
have never considered il a boost
TO have il said of one that he
loves people" Many, many,
many, many many people are
mean and dirty and all around
orney and 10 have il said of you
that you love them would indi-
cate that you are weak-minded.
or, If you personally prompted
the report. an internal liar.
am willing 10 let it be said
OF you without challenge, or you
may say IL yourself, that you
love some people.
THE statement about which I
am making all this squawk
often appears in obituary
notices, used in the past tense,
OF course. II is with blush Of
shame that | confess that /
have used II no less than three
times that l remember in the
past couple of years-"he loved
people"
IT is one OF those things you
drop in without thinking when
you are trying 10 say something
nice about one who has de-
parted this vale of tears, as
we say. He loved people,
said of each of these fellows, but
! have since learned that two of
then actually hated people. in
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1944-08-24

EDITORS NOTE-Pvt. Pick.
erins. former Times eolumnist.
is an infantrymon at Fl. Me-
Cleiian, Ala. These writings are
excerpts from his letters TO
friends at the office.
Just some odd notes about
things;
WHAT would the soldiers Of
W the last war say about it
now they've got WACs working
as MP's, posted at the gates.
They're not bad al the job,
either.
And the other evening there
was a rather pretty girl al a
party that was held for our
company's first sergeant who is
about TO retire after 30 years in
the army. The sergeant told me
that she was-and you surely
wouldn't have believed il 10
look at her. because she was so
dainty-working as a mechanic
IN the motor pool. She was one
of three who made the grade
out Of a large class. That's one
thing that the girls aren't very
good at doing
One of the noncoms stuck his
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1944-08-24
WASHINGTON Scene
BY George Dixon

I WAS squatting in my office
L today looking like a bilious
yogi when friend poked ms
head in.
What's that silly expression
you WEAR" he asked.
I'm looking shamefaced," I
replied Il have just gummed
things up TO a farc-you-weii.'
There il nothing unique
about that" retorted my friend.
what did you garble this
time:
II didn't garbIe IL. I am the
victim Of inefficient help. I'm
getting more than my share"
"THiT'S sad" said my friend
What did these ficnds
in human form do To you9
We'll they reported that the
Republican national committee
IL about TO appoint a new pub
lefty director. Then they said
the new director would be a
man named Bill Wight, an as
sociate Of man named God
FREY Hammond.
This last was all backward.
The new director will be God
frey Hammond who has been
associated with Bill Wight"
Are YOU sure you didn't ball
II up. yourself:9"
Positive" l said. 81 have IL
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1944-08-24
One Word Led To Another
By Patterson
Inc Detroit Time.
By Arthur Bugs" Baer-

A national that has a presidential campaign its
1914 hands is buster than keyhole coumnis in door
factory.
That's out present fermenting condition right now
and it's mans job with suffrage. I'm not saying
the ladies make an election any worse.
Now I've known some great gals in my newspaper
and and We're governors.
In fact got in quite long distance jam with Pa and
Ma Ferguson of Texas When Ma took Pas place in
the gubernatoria wckiup wrote In the old days of
Texas when men we're men-and so were the governors
Since then have been quite meticulous about what
write concerning the shrller in politics It looks
like they're here to stay. Some day even figure the
president Of the United States will lpsck for the
Great Seal
While the Declaration of Indignation doesn't say
word about being free and equal I'm sure there
Will soon be amendment the marginal notes that will
add the legislative vitamns
Featu Syndia Inc.
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1944-08-24

the ends of the fractured bones
are in position or not: the only
purpose of the splint is to re-
duce pain and shock.
For poisonings don't try 10
remember the exact antidote.
General measures are Of more
Importance - empty the stom-
ach by vomiting, the bowels by
enema, get the patient 20 bed
and sweating The universal
antidote that can probably be
found in any household is tine
ture Of iodine added 10 boiled
starch Or egg white and baking
soda.
Natural disease that produces
emergencies in adults mani
tests itself in the great ma
jority Of cases by pain tappen-
dicitlS, gallstones. heart pa.nl
or shortncSs Of breath For any
Of them. rest. hot water bags.
and paregoric viii do best until
the doctor comes.
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1944-08-24

THERE are two schools Of
thought on the future Of
this country and one Of them is
getting all the publicity. That
school believes that Congress
should sew up by legislation all
the proposals for the postwar
America now before the AnWr-
lean people change their minds.
The other school says that
there is no advantage in this
ruSh-order business because if
Americans change their minds.
they have means not only 10
force Congress but even the
President TO obey their will
One OF the master ideas that
is rushing like a geyser these
days IS one year compulsory
military service. The idea is
that boys at Is are TO be taken
out of school and are 10 be
drilled in the art Of soldering.
then they are to so back TO
school.
The point about doing il now
Is that this country is in a war
atmosphere; exactly that has
happened 10 millions Of our boys
and therefore why not TO other
millions of forthcoming gener-
ations?
WHOSE who favor the project
fear That when the war is
over this country might get
pcdce-rinded, might even say.
To he'll with war. and might
therefore oppose any such bill.
The clear fact in this war is
that most of the countries
which employed the device of
compulsory military service are
being defeated. The exception
10 that is Soviet Russia which
Is victorious as a result of
British fortitude after Dun
kerque and the productivity of
American industry plus Rus
sian strength.
From a military standpoint.
the experience of the United
States and Great Britain is
probably short of the best SCI
entfc attitude: yet. from a
political and social standpoint.
those countries have avoided
the worst evils Of a huge mill
tary establishment in peace
time, and the employment of
the armed forces for political
purposes through the machina-
tons Of a permanent military
caste.
IT Is beneficial 10 the United
Il States that in time Of peace,
our admiralS and generals de-
vote themselves TO paper-work
and tea parties.
In spite of a quarter Of
century of such activities. Mac
Arthur, Bradley and Patton are
showing the Germans, Italians
and Japanese exactly what
citizens quickly modified army
can do-and Montgomery has
been showing that 10 the best
the Germans could produce
throughout this war.
Lots of l1S-year-olds will be
drafted before this war is finally
ended and there seems TO be no
need for any rush-order deci-
sIons as 10 the future.
But what has me puzzled
most Is that on the one hand
the politicians want 10 estab-
lSh compulsory military train
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1944-08-24
h. ". DURLHNG

81. Louis. She made her FIRST
New York appearance. As
chorus girl in Shuttle Along
the best all Negro show Of all
tIme,
CONCENTRATE on the music
" and tai little while
dancing. a better dance results.
That's my opinion. But perhaps
/ am wrong. My distinguished
colleague, DR.. Albert Edward
Wiggam, discussing this matter.
says. Forget the music: talk
Ia your partner about the
weather or love or some other
trivial subject"
We viii pass by the good doc
tors classification of love as "a
trivial subject. Maybe ne is
kidding, We will grant some
remarks on love are all right
during a dance provided they
are brief Such as VINO do you
love. baby?" or "Cuddle up a
little closer, sweetie pie" Or
something like that.
.Rgt-w strongly advise etH
male clients not 10 start talking
about the weather in the middle
OF a rhumba, Samba or conga.
QUERIES from clients: q
" How can you call Terrible
Terry McGovern a Brooklynlte
when he was born in Johns
town, Pa
A-That's the first time !
have heard Terry was born in
Jof1stown. All I know j. he
lived In South Brooklyn from
childhood. But take Jim JEFF
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1944-08-24
On the
Side

fries. He II considered CALI
fornian. yet was born In Ohio.
$50 you claim YOU know
somebody in every town in the
country Who do you know in
Santa Maria, Cal?
Al didn't say every town
but NEARLY every town" As
for Santa Maria, I will name
that brilliant raconteur and
bOniface. Frank Mccoy.
Q-Were your parents college
graduates?
Any mo er graduated
from Hunter College, Manhat-
tan, when IL was known as Nor
NAL College. My father left
SrhnOt when II years Of age, but
spent a long period In self
education.
IT Is remarkable how far some
L men will go when they be-
come particularly interested in
something For example. take
Prof. Alexander Ivanovlch Pet
runkevich of Yale. He wrote 33
books about spiders.
One of the greatest Paris
dress designers of all time was
Worth. Yet he was an English
man. He couldn't speak word
Of French.
In England the film Gas
light" starring Charles Boyer
and Ingrid Bergman, is called
The Murder in Thornton
Square. -
They had 10 change the name
because there is a successful
British film called Fanny by
Gaslight." G
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1944-08-24

YESTERDAY our article was
i about the common medical
emergencies of infancy and
childhood.
Today we will consider the
medical emergencies which may
occur 20 adults.
A possible fracture should al
ways be suspected in a collision
accident-being knocked down
by an automobile. etc.-or a
fall, and falls are very common
household accidents in the late
summer and early fall. what
with getting up on rickety lad
ders for house cleaning or GO
Ang down dark cellar stairs 10
TART the furnace, etc.
you are in the presence Of a
person who has suffered
such an accident, and there is
no doctor or anybody else
around what are YOU 70 do?
Well, tho first piece Of advice
] feel like giving is that OF
famous old Dublin practitioner
who was outlining his final
Testament If wisdom in the art
OK treatment 10 a favorite as
sistant who was leaving HIM 70
IN out 70 A Wilderness Of pa
tents Of his own The young
man had-rtrparted and closed
the door when the old doctor
ran after him and said. And.
oh, Charlle-one other thing
don't do too much"
The tendency when a person
has been knocked down or fallen
off something and is lying
dazed IN a heap IS 10 display
great activity when as a mat
ter Of wisdem masterful mac
ttvity is called for. Do not try
10 move them about too much.
or lift the head. or arrange the
clothes The injured person is
bound 10 be in more ore less
shock and such movements only
aid 10 the shock.
The more severe the injury
the less the patient should be
handled.
ESPECIALLY don't trv 70
- move tho limbs 10 see if
there Is a di>location or a frac-
ture. After The shock is over
and the victim has come out
OF his daze, and he has 10 be
transported 10 a doctor. if YOU
even suspect a fracture. put on
a simple spiIut with a piece
az board or a pillow or a sling
II doeSn make any difference
1r immediate purposes whether
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1944-08-24
Brain Game Answers

1-Nice admiral
2-Somcthtng old and something
borrowed.
3-llartlord. Conn. Olympia.
Wash; Baton Rouge. La;
Columbia s l. -pes -Melnes,
IA.
Ia Southampton; CO. The
Half Moon.
5-ta) False They were known
as Devil Dogs" The Ladies
From Hell were members Of
the Black Watch, a famous
Scottish regiment who fought
in kits; (b) True.
Sec IS correct.
Pierre LEnfant.
8-William Powell and Myrna
10y.
Copyright 1914, by King Features
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1944-08-24
FROCf~NID TOOnS

PROCESNID FOODS
Rlue As through F-s-Vaid lndeN.
nIfFtF
Blue G-S through Is Valid Sept. 1
Indefinitely
MEATS. CHEESE. FATS
Red A-S through D-S-Na.d insefi-
rtflY
one ih. salvage fat. good Tor Z cents
and two meat ration points.
SUGAR
Stamps 80. 81 aud 50. Book a.
N4ad iadednitelF
stamp 80, No. I Book-Vslid Sept. 1,
stamp 90. NJ. Book ms for
81 canning Through FEB Is 1915
spare stamp 81. No. 4 Book Valid
f1r maximum q ~ JOS. for can-
mig Apply local board
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1944-08-24
Detroit Times Rationing Timetable
GASOLINE

GASOLINE
A Coupon rs gals Valid through
Sept u.
RS and C-S Coupons gals each.
Bt and ca CoupOns gals each.
claw requires state name and license
number be written on every coupon
when received
FUEL OF
Period 4 and Period 5--Nslid through
Sept 80
Period l-vsNd through Sept. 20,
ig45.
LIQtOR
No. i2--Valid thSogeh Aug 81.
SHOES
Alrplsne stamps I and f-vali In
definitely.
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1944-08-24
By DR.. Logan
Clendening

neuritis, when, properly. it
should be called neuralgia. Neu-
ritis is an inflammation or de-
q generation Of nerve and usu-
ally leads not only 10 pain but
also 10 paralysis. Many are the
causes Of neuritiS-infection. de-
generation by lead. and other
poiSons. nutritional disturbances
such as diabetes and vitamin
B deficiency (beri-beril. Only
in the last class is diet effective.
j G. SIS stilbesterol used
as treatment for Frohhck's
syndrome?
Answer Best treatment is by
thyroid eXuactA15 grains daily
and Antuitrin-S hypodermically.
G F. c: Is there any remedy
for recurrent canker sores in
the mouth?
A.: DR.. James Grace Of Ann
Arbor Mich. made the discov-
cry seYeIal-Aaars- aRe-tkat
dicalclum-phoSpha1e and puri-
fed bone phosphate in equal
parts relieved canker sores. The
Cpjohn Drug Co. put up these
lozenges in l5-graln sizes. The
dose Is four lOzengeS a day foI
adults, two for children.
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1944-08-24

3-There Is no evidence that
women think longer or more
profoundly on moral problems
than do men. The evidence
runs the other way. All the
greatest moral leaders from the
Bible writers 10 Confucius,
Plato and John Dewey have
been men, not women.
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1944-08-24
YOUR
SUCCESS IN MARRIAGE

Are you good risk a. marriage
partner
Can you be happy with the partner
Of your choice
What are the signs that fofe'eA the
success " any marriage
Two % Americas outstanding
slcio,ogists spent several years
searching out this vNai information
and now Or Wggam has secured u
for YOU WIN ~ you can score
yourself and your paNrer on The i'm
portrait factors 20 marriage success.
THIS booker Will BE sent a. cost.
i0c and stamped f3cJ belf-ac-
dressed envelope. Address Dr. Wig
gam, LET : EXPLORE YOUR
. MIND e . this newspaper.
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1944-08-24
Connolly Answers

l-(cl. 2-tb). 3 Cb). 4
ca. 5-ta). 6-la) Venice:
CO. Paris; tcl Florida; Cd
Athens; tel Spain
coDyrght 1874. by King Feature.
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1944-08-24

GONE Of the cadremen here
y are quick thinkers. Sgt.
Dawes, a Kentucky lad over in
B Company, was in the pit from
which traineeS were throwing
live hand grenades. There were
two traineeS, and one of them
got panicky and dropped his
grenade after he had pulled the
safety pin.
The trainees started 70 climb
out Of the pit 10. get away. In
virtually one movement Sgt.
Dawes bumped the recruits,
knocking them down, and then
threw the grenade out before
it exploded, harmlessly.
If he hadn't knocked them
down they'd have been wounded
for sure and perhaps somebody
would have been killed, because
there wasn't time 10 climb out.
You have less than five seconds
between pulling the pin and the
explosion of the grenade, so
you can see what a close call,
and what fast thinking, that
was.
One Of the recruits tried TO
kidnap the chaplain's cat the
other day for a pet, so one Of
the officers, 1t. Frederick L.
Hunter, got a puppy from the
post vet so the boy would have
a pet. Officially the pup is the
company mascot. with his own
CT dogtags on his collar. His
name Is G.. I. Joe.
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1944-08-24

4 NJ NOT going 10 tell YOU how
"A long ago II was that | at
tended public school No. ? in the
beautiful Bay Ridge section Of
the charming city of Brooklyn
But il wasn't yesterday. Any
way, my sister, a sentimental
sort of a person, writes she has
Just been on another trip 10 the
'old neighborhood." She says
public school No. 2 is still housed
in the same building as when
we were kids. And II was an
old building then For a place
claiming 10 be the richest city.
in the world" New York City
certainly has a lot OF antique
school buildings.
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1944-08-24
THE BRIGHTER SIDE

A MONG those l have checked
= and okayed for the purge is
the fellow of whom IL is said,
He loves people," l think we
have gone along with him as
far as we should.
have never been able TO get
a bill of particulars from this
fellow or his admirers. / mean
detailed information for the
basis of the statement, HE
koves people" ~
| have not been able to obtain
from or any one connected with
HIM an explanation for the sig
niicance of the propaganda,
He loves people" That is TO
say, what of il?
l have asked what people
does he love ?
How many?
Their names and addresses,
please?
All right, then, two or
three?
/ have asked why does he
love them?
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1944-08-24
Letters From
A Soldier

here, il doesn't solve the prob
lem. Anyway, they both Like
JEANNE best.
HERE'S a stock question to
IL find out whether a soldier
knows his weapons properly.
Ask him how the hammer
operates on a machine gun. II
he tells you-he's taking. Be-
cause there isn't any hammer
on a machine gun. The firing
pin is operated by a strong
spring. We caught couple of
traineeS on that one tonight,
just checking up TO see whether
they-were on the ball.
Back when the column was
running | wrote a piece about
the 3S-year-old grandfather
married at 49, who stood next
20 me in my platoon. l just got
a letter from him. He's in
France already.
Charlie Gehringer's cousin Is
a tralnee here al Fort McClel-
Ian.
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1944-08-24
QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS

S l.: What causes the Stom-
ach 10 rumble between break
fast and lunch lunch and din
ner, every day? l don't even
feel hungry.
Answer. II dOesn [ mean any
thing Sometimes II gets to be-
a bad habit The stomach picks
up bad habits as well as the
rest Of US
A G. What is the cause Of
neuriuS and what IS neurItiSo
What kind Of diet Viii cure ~?
A.: The term neuritis is used
very indiscrIminatoly by both
doctors and laymen. Any PAIN
along a nerve path is called
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1944-08-24

CONTEMPORARY says: The
~ best gangster play Of all
was Broadway" / don't think
so. / believe The Racket" was
the best.
ut Is the female mosquito
that does the singing" states
a-man Of science. THE male
mesquite II friendly little fei-
low and never bites anybody"
CNote-Rudyard Kipling after
reading a scientific article
about bears in which the writer
said the female OF the species
is more deadly than the male
was inspired TO write his i'm
mortal poem containing that
llnel.
Josephine Baker, noted Negro
entertainer. now in Cairo, is "A
captain in the Women's aux
iliary Of the French Air Force.
Josephine was originally from
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1944-08-24

NO ANSWER. Not a peep.
~ Well, | never trusted this
mugg much anyway. because If
he was Square John and did
not inspire the statement "He
loves people" he would have
come out with a fat denial the
minute II was first said of him,
The CIO news. (Cumberland, Md.) 1942-????, 1944-04-10
Soys War
Brings Australia.
SfofeS Closer

Washington, Apr. 8 - Fraternal
greetings from Australian union
wives to their auxiliary sisters In
the United States were received
this week by the CLIO Congress of
Women's Auxiliaries.
1--WE are looking forward to ex-
changing correspondence and con-
TACT" Mrs. Pearl Hickey of Sidney.
Australia, Secretary of the Aus
tralian Railways Union Women's
Auxiliary, wrote in answer to greet
ings sent by the CLIO auxiliaries.
1--WE feel that the war will bring
the people of American and Aus
tralia In closer contact and SYM
pathy," Mrs. Hickey wrote. your
servicemen's uniforms are a famili-
ar sight on our buses, trains, trans
and ferries. Let US all hope that
in the future this bond will be
strengthened for the purpose of
building a better world"
The CIO news. (Cumberland, Md.) 1942-????, 1944-04-10

of our tomorrows hang In the bal
ance. We can have full employment
or unemployment.
ALTERNATIVES
I'VE can have an end Of war
based on international collaboration
or we can sow the seeds Of new war
by returning to the anarchy OF
isolation. We can have a govern
ment based on enlightened and pro-
gressive domestic policies or we
can have a reactionary govern
ment which will grind labor
beneath Its heel.
(Which Of these alternatives be-
comes a reality depends on what
we In the CLIO do In political &C.
ton. Political action must be the
life and breath Of the CLIO until
election day"
Al . first and continuing Job,
Murray and Hillman stressed the
need 30 get every possible voter
registered in time TO vote In
November. "You must push reg
istration to the very limit because
without votes we are helpless.
Remember that . light vote II
always n reactionary VOTE" they
warned.
The CIO news. (Cumberland, Md.) 1942-????, 1944-04-10

bargaining contracts, your educa-
ton and recreation program all
largely depend on your political
program" they said.
This is true because much of
the success of all your union pro-
grams depends on the success OF
united CLIO political action and the
election of a liberal, progressive
government in the U. S. It's as
simple as that"
Warning that the job b far
from easy, Murray and Hillman
reminded their readers that we
would have 10 overcome out
NODDED attitudes about political
action within the labor movement
itself. We are going 10 have to
develop new, politically conscious
attitudes among the leadership
and the rank and file Of labor.
"And this must be accomplished
In the short time between now
and November I. It Is going to
take all Of US, using every blt
Of time and energy possible, TO
do the job"
Asking them to get q feeling o.
urgency about political action, the
two leaders said: 1.-THE prospect:
The CIO news. (Cumberland, Md.) 1942-????, 1944-04-10
Asks Aircraft
Commission

Washington, Apr. Q - The Inn
mediate establishment Of an air
craft commission which would have
nationwide jurisdiction over all
wage problems In the airframe. air
craft engine and airplane parts In
dustries was urged this week by
Richard T. Frankensteen, Sice-Pres-
ident and national director Of the
Aircraft Division. Cx0 Omitted Auto
Workers Union.
In q letter to Chairman William
Davis. Of the Natl. War Labor
Board, Frankensteen said that the
need for equitable sterilization Of
aircraft wages throughout the ma
tion on an equal pay for equal
work" basis requires the establish
ment Of such a commission.