The Waterbury Democrat., 1943-03-04
Walter Wincheu
 10 Nezo York
nE PaIyA1E M ~ RArERs or 4

TIE PRIVATE PAPERS OF A
 CUB REPORTER
 RAusing to inspect the photos of Alfred LInt and Lynn Fontanne in hont of the Martin Beck, theater, where they are starring in ~The Pirate" . hit the reporter is rc. minded of the delightful story con- corning their first venture in Holly wood .. During the film os '@The uuardsTnan" Miss Fontanne saw the first weeks '.rushes" or takes" and rushed home to her husband .. T was horriblel" Lynn shrieked wildly. Terrible, unbelievable, aw- full I tell you can't go on with Gtl"
 How was IS" inquired the in- different Lunt.
 Darling" said his wife, "you were charming as you always are. You may have to do a little something about-yoyr makeup, because at cer- tain times you look as though you didn't have any lips. But, Alfred, what am to do?' My voice sounds impossible, and I haven't any eyes, and my face is expressionlesS and 1t looks as though don't know what e0 do with my handsl"
 There was a long pause "Al. tred," continued Lynn, T tell you I can't go on. Can't we get e re- lease2 wen use our savings to- pay them for their trouble. Oh, my darling, what will do?"
 1.,. lips, eh?"
 It happened during the recent FBI raid on Tough Touhy and Basil Banghart in Chicago John Ed. gar Hoover, leading the raid in the pitch black night, gun in hand, ac- cidentally stepped on e sleeping cat ... The G-Man's surprise-you can well inagine-was as startling as the pussy'sl
 But what we started out to re- port was a comment of Banghart, who said: "Mr. Hoover, please send me to Alcatraz. I hate where I wasl" MT. Hoover asked: whats wrong with 1t? It has nice, big, stone wall, to keep out the riff-raff!" To which Bang hart whined: T don't like 1t there. Too many thieves. They are the worst card.cheats of all!"
 You've probably read 1t before. TthaCs how we got 1t. B ut 1t be. longs here, we think. It's too good for the opposition, anyhow.
 It's the one about the cook on a destroyer, who was sooooo seasick. The Captain on the bridge, was cold and hungry. He sent 6 It. below to bring back 8 couple of harn.and. egg sandwiches .. The officer found the cook prostrate across table "A couple of hanl-and- egg sandwiches for the Captain, he parked.
 "Ohhhhh''! groaned the agonized cook. I'm soooo sick. I just couldn't look ct food. Please go awaaaaaay!"
 Do you know what will happen If y0U don't?" Sked the It.
 what can happen-what can happen?" groaned the cook.
 "The Captain will come down here and shoot you!"
 "Ohhhhh," was the retort, T WISH HE WOULD"
 Tho chap who cooked up the slogan "rhS best tunes of all move to Car- negie tIall," probly still has red face, The whole business, of courOe, was calculated to work up interest in 6 radio program which would offer the greatest popular music ever composed So the premiere broadcast was recently aired from Carnegie Hall, which for fifty years presented artists such as Toscanini, Paderewski, HeifetZ, Rachmaninoff and music by Bee. thovon, Brahms, Bach and Mozart And what was the opening numher2
 "Boo Hoo" by Carmen Lomhardol What you apparently missed" writes J. K. of Washington, when you radio'd the twenty Republicans (who got up ready to denounce Re. publican Lambertson for saying FDR brought his sons back to safe. ty) was that Rep. Glare Luces maiden speech In the House almost wasn't about globaloney. She was among the 20 Repubs who jumped up. Her maiden speech nearly pc. came Q defense of the RooSevelts!'
 This story, they relate, hes made the Foxhole Network when Gen. Eisenhower was Q high school football squad captain, someone told him the school had cancelled game because the rival team had Q Negro in It's lineup The story is supposed to have depressed Eisenhower, who was found weep ing near the lockers He pro. tested the sort of discrimination that had sent his parents to Amer. lea from Germany ... The result of his indignation was that the game was played as scheduled.
 That Negro is now Captain Nor" man Johnson, one of the officers serving in North Africa under Gen. eral Eisenhower.
 
 Free Speech Dept: Gerald L. K. Smith formed a branch of his new America First Party in Pittsburgh recently, where he spoke. He asked all those wanting him to return for nxak1aaVs V,aaakiSaep tA raise their OaWS