The Waterbury Democrat., 1943-02-19

NOTES OF A NEW YORKER
In Congress the other day a
newly-elected Democrat from Ar
kansaw delivered his maiden speech
which was slap back at the House
Of Representatives. prettiest menu
Der, Rep. Glare Luce Of Conn.
The gentleman from Arkansaw
didn't Like the lady from Connec-
ticuts "globalony' phrase 1T
lis q Winchellisnn," he shouted:
aBroadwayese hardly belongs In so
distinguished a place as Congress,
ETC." The gentleman from Ar
kansaw apparently Is a syndicate
reader and confuses the colyum's
.hullabalony" and "Eer Goebbolony'
with Rep. Luce's word What
might alnuse the chic Congressman
likin from Connecticut more is the
crack about her One Of her
dissenters argues that she oughta
be sent to the war zones with
other lend-Luce,"
A newspaper pal left word for a
colleague to phone him at the Ma
tional Press Club -. The phone
operator apparently was busy i.
The Press Club didn't answer +.
-FCan you imagine that" he
groaned, "the most famous Press
Club in the worlds doesn't answer"
"It's a place for newspaper
men," barked the city editor, ITO
which they can escape at least once
o highland not have to answer
phones"
One Of The latest Dorothy Parker
isrns concerns the enormous dark
blue hat which she has been hiding
under for the last few years. It Is
an immense sized thing Once
1t had a shape and stood away out
to here and was right pert, but now
IL Just droops and droops i.
Tennyrate, the other night some
bods; tipped the brim Of the mel
a11choly chapeau, and said: "Thass
q nice III hat you have there, Dotty"
:. I. "Oh," replied Miss p, slap
ping the air with limp wrist, you
mean this one? THIS Is the one
that now can vote"
Two years ago a Broadway press
agent office handled a newcomer
from Mexico, who had talent. He
was working at a cabaret and often
said: If you ever fix 1t for me to
60 to Hollywood, will never forget
you" They were so impressed
with his capabilities, they arranged
for movie scouts to look at his act
and they "went for him." just like
that, /. He was signed at eight
times his Broadway wages He
needed extra coin, however, to go
to the Coast in style He put
"the bite" on the two press agents
for 5000 :. II send back the money
right away" he promised, because
never forget you" He has APP
peared in several films, but never a
word from him No dough, no
1lothir' So what happens? SO
what happens Two years later
he sent letter The exploiters
ripped 1t open feverishly (times be-
ing what they are for Broadway
press agents. and they almost
Swooned at his gall =. He en-
closed papers for them to fill IN
so he could get credit from a lead
ing West Coast department store.
Read this and thank us for the
warning. It's q new howl for the
practical jokers i. They come up
to you and say: 'E1ave you seen
the new test the phychiatrists are
givingp" "Nh-nh," you nh-nh.
"WhassatP" j.. WELL" you are in
structed, "make q fist and hold 1t
so the knuckles are vertical -. I.
After you've done that, lighted
matches are inserted between the
clenchsd fingers and the jerk Chats
youO Is told to blow them out :.
Whereupon all the clowns start
singing: Happy Birthday to Yoooo.'
A Hollywood producer In town a
week weeks ago visited one Of Broad.
ways most distinguished playwrights
and offered him a lavish sum to
prepare film script for "Dante's
Inferno" F1attered, the play
wright said: IT'D really love to do
it, but I'm pretty busy and it's a
big Job. Tell you the truth" he
said, "Ive never read the book"
. . . "You don't have to read It,"
said the West Coast genius. I'll
show you the old silent version"
4
He's one Of the nations outstand-
ing industrial engineers - very IN
yolved with war production IN half a
dozen plants In the New York area.
He finds 1t necessary to dash from
factory to factory in his chauffeur
driven car -. Pleading the need
for relaxation, he has persuaded the
aides who accompany him to join
in "a marathon gin-rummy game,
played on q folding shelf in, the
back Of the car His youthful
assistants can't beat him, and to
date the "boss" Is ahead hundreds
Once In a while, one Of the
boys has run Of luck. but 1t never
lasts long If they see TINS
they'll saVvy :. Whenever our
Hero Is dealt a poor ''mltt ne
coughs twice, a cue for the chauf-
feur to take corner sharply. The
cards spill onto the floor-the boss"
says: "Oops, sorry" and they deal
O new hand. @%
she's a Hollywood starlet whose
option wasn't picked up by the stu
Cio. and she figured on getting Q
fresh start via role in a Broad
way play :. Desperate when none
turned up, she donned the last OF
her smart clothes and went to a
81 EASE DON'T Il