Evening star., 1943-03-09
Be Wary Of
POssessiye
Family
By Dor0fhr Dix

Dear Miss Dix: Here Is anothe,
problem caused by the war mar
riages to which I wish to call the
ettentlon Of all Young girls. as it i,
danger that they could not pos
siblv suspect themselves. And it
happened to me-, and It can happen
70 them.
During the last war I was 18 and
fell in love with a Young lad Of 81
Puppy love. Of course. He enlisted
but after he left, his family gathered
me to their bOsomS because I was
engaged TO him and was his pros
0cctive bride. 7 was invited 10 dim
ner weekly. When he came home
on fUrlOugh, We spent our time to-
gether. mostly with his close family
and their friends At Christmas
! was remembered With gifts by his
parents.
When in the due course Of events
my interest began to flag, as did the
boys, his mother frantically tele-
phoned and pleaded with me to
write him She kept telling me how
much her son adored me. or course
I was fattered, and little did I
suspect then that I was being used
to keep their darling from getting
too serious with other girls away
from home, and also to boost up
his morale a little.
But when he came home safe and
! was no longer needed as a pro-
lection, I was dropped with a dull
cold thud. I am not whining. ]
am married now and very happy
But my daughter of 18 is being
wOCed as I was by the boys par
cnts for the identical same reason
Their aggressive and posSessive at
titudc is keeping her from enjoying
her teens as she should be. and
when she reaches her 20s and the
boy comes back she will be out of
the race. in all probability losing
out to some younger and more at
traCtiVe girl.
There are many such cases, but
what can mothers do? Young girls
are gullible and I don't think many
l8-yearolders can resist the fat
terry Of boys family paying them
50 much attention. 7 don't like tC
think that there will be girls who
will have the all-gone and hurt
feeling that these girls will get when
the boy comes back home and the
girls are let down with a thud that
gives them a wound that they never
quite get over.
Won't you please speak a word
so these girls can at least have
been warned by one who has beer
there? A MOTHER
AnSWer-Though one spoke with
the voice Of men and of angels. nc
l6-year-old girl. suffering from her
first attack Of puppy love and be-
unused with the romance of being
engaged to soldier who is about
TO start on the great adventure. and
practically hypnotized by the fiat
terry Of being received as a member
Of her Sweetheart's family, would
listen to you.
You speak to deaf ears that not
only cannot hear you. but that do
not want to hear you. For it is only
at that age that we never question
love, either our own or another's s.
or suspicion motives. or doubt that
all Of our dreams will come true.
But I do think YOU have spoken
word in season in warning these
little engages not TO take it too
seriously, and to think it is for keeps
when their prospective in-laWS begin
claSping them to their hearts. For.
9 times out Of 10, it is a purely
protein gesture and not intended to
last beyond the duration.
And it is intended as protective
screen for Johnny, rather than in
spired by any thought Of the girls
we'll being. Johnny is at the age
when he has TO love somebody. and
it had better be a nice girl, whose
people they know, than some cutie
he would pick up at camp. Or
some stranger he might marry after
a two days' acquaintance. So they
welcome Mamie or Sadie and try to
keep her satisfied by their atten-
tions and to keep johnny perpetu-
ally isolated from other females by
stressing his engagement to the
home girl.