davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Detroit evening times., 1943-01-08
by Damon RunyOn

HOLLYWOOD scented censor
IL ship in this notion, and
there was quite an uproar over
the matter. but 1 just sat back
quietly and had the reason for
the suggestion pretty we'll ana
lyzed even before Mr.. Lowell
Mellett. head of the division, and
a nice quiet, genteel chap and a
fine newspaperman, denied the
censorship implication.
l had it figured out that ii
gets a little lonesome at times
in the motion picture division of
the Owl. especially in the Hol-
lywood office thereof, and that
the boys got to thinking that a
bit Of reading matter and some
pictures would serve TO tighten
the tedium of their lives and one
of them thought up the idea of
calling for those treatments and
trough cuts"
1t struck me that the request
was a compliment TO the motion
picture industry rather than an
ominous note. as it indicated
that the literary taste of the fell
lows of the MPD of the Owl is
in accord with that of Holly
wood. After all, if they were not
pro-pictures they could have sent
around to the public library and
called for much more enlighten-
ing literature than mere treat
ments, treatment being a sort
of roundup of a yarn that is
later TO be extended into n
shooting script for the cameras.
Detroit evening times., 1943-01-08
Better Health
BY DIR. Logan CIendening

LIVE, breathe and have my
being in Kansas City, Mo.
and recently an administration
bureau selected three families in
Kansas City and tried out on
them a weeks recipes which in
cluded meat rationing and were
supposed 10 be an economical
and well-balanced diet.
The reactions Of the house.
wives in my native town. after
having tried the diet, were as
follows:
"They made no allowances
for leftOvers."
1T il too expensive
There was 80 much meat that
never want to see meat again"
IT SOUNDS 10 me little as
Il though the nutritionists in
Washington had been facing A
typewriter instead Of a kitchen
stove
Perhaps what the nutritionists
in Washington need is a course
IN Mr. Sq1eers school at Dothe-
BOYS Hall.
This was in Nicholas Nick
leby,' if you remember. and Mr..
SqueerS' method Of teaching
was: after a boy spelled botany.
"b-o-t-t-i-n-g," he was told 10
go out and weed the garden.
This gave him a first-hand
acquaintance with the actualities
of life.
Before the rest of the United
States follows the typewriter
nutritionistS, I advise them 10
buy The Pocket Cook Book
which Will cost 25 cents.
Chapter ! of this volume is
Cookery Terms and Defini-
tlonS.
After reading II you under
stand what II is 10 marinate,
10 parboil. 10 braise, 10 score,
10 truss and TO unmold.
CHAPTER 2 is a Table Of
" Standard NJ o urements:
chapter 4 is Safe Stubstitu-
tons" chapter 7 is Good Nu-
triton Simplified." which in
cludes a vitamin primer. a
mineral primer, a handy calorie
chart and two pages on how 10
save vitamins and minerals.
Chapter 8 is on leftovers and
what 10 do with them; chapter
9 is called Penny Stretchers:"
chapter 10 is Sugar Sparing
Detroit evening times., 1943-01-08

have taken the Japs to the Solo,
mons and the AleutianS.
Or, as DR.. Lin Yutang ex-
plains the paradox, we sold the
Japs the Ninth Avenue Elevated
so they could make bullets.
Now we have torn down the
Second Avenue Elevated 10 make
bullets 10 fire back at the Ninth
Avenue train.
HOUSE foreign affairs COM
- mittee should include be-
sides Glare Boothe Luce, a IA
nous medical missionary from
China, DR.. Walter III. Judd,
elected from Minneapolis.
He was one of many warning
us years ahead of Japan's method
of attacks.
Possibly the Luce-Judd com
bination might shake some Of
the mentally Stagnatcd members
OF the state department.
GRANDFATHER of the present
" emperor of Japan, had y
concubines who gave him il
girls and one boy.
The boy became the present
emperor's father, but went daffy
a few years before ne died.
Papa of the present Hirohito
made one Of his last appearances
when, at a graduation ceremony
IN an imperial school, he took a
diploma, looked through il in
telescope fashion and shouted 10
the student.
"Oh. l know who you are"
DAY KINNEY, the coast to
IL coast Hawaiian bandman
who recently played 10 a S22,-
900 house IN Chicago. knows
Hawaiian legislative work.
He worked as a page boy in
the Territorial halls
His brother is an outstanding
authority on Japs IN Hawaii and
published a book % years ago
which was suppressed because IT
revealed Jap plots and intrigue
in illegal immigration work.
MEMO TO w. W.-How about
wi another piece. on your Ie-
turn, on Americans We Can Do
Without, 10 include those new
operating in this country who
would like 10 treat the Japs
nice?
We need a good healthy ex-
pose of pacifist individuals who
think We mustn't treat the Japs
rough.
MY MOTTO-Dcep At the
heart Of Tokio-long may she
blaze
Copyrgh, BY Dsry Mirror. Inc.
Detroit evening times., 1943-01-08
the Side

The UidcSt land
Doom takes TO part us, ieGtes
thy heart IN mine,
With pulses that beat double.
What I do
And what ! dream include thee,
as the tOine
Must taste Of ITS oCn grapes.
Elizabeth Barrett Browning.
(The above is an excerpt from
"SonnetS From the Portuguese,
the greatest poem ever written
in praise of a husband.
ct is interesting 10 consider
that so great poem was in
spired by married love.
(This seems 10 confirm the
contention of many that the real
love story begins at the altar
EVDD
MIR. AND MRS. GEORGE NJ.
WI COHEN of Panora, Ia,
were married for 80 years.
This must be the United States
record.
Jane c. Humphrey OF Los An
geles has been the secretary Of
lawyer Isadore Dockweiler for
46 years.
And il that isn't a record for
continuous employment Of sec
retary and stenographer l Will
be very much surprised.
A San Franciscan says that
during 1912 he bet 81 on every
horse with a name beginning
with Valdina. He claims he
made lot of money by sticking
TO this quaint system.
A New Jersey dog expert
claims that horse meat is the
favorite meat of all dogs.
After that, says he, the dogs
like rabbit meat best.
When fed to dogs the expert
adds both horse meat and rabbit
meat should be cooked.
The dogs don't like it raw.
A UNITED STATES Army
n corporal tells me there is
night spot in Fayetteville,
n. C., which is placarded For
Officers Only"
Asks the corporal with much
justice:
"Is this sample of the
democracy the men In the
armed forces are fighting for ?'
One out of every 10 employ
able persons in the United
States is on a public pay roll.
At this writing 5,285,600 per-
sons are on public pay rolls.
That is they have a fede1 al,
state, county or city govern
ment Job.
Group of Pittsburgh young
Detroit evening times., 1943-01-08
The Brighter Side

TTIE new fashion of viewing
Il with distruSt all acts of gov
ernment agencies, or bureaus, is
growing 10 such an extent that
many persons see sinister mo-
tives in the most innocent little
things.
I am happy TO say I am not
of a suspicious nature and when
o I h ers are hollering murder
about some gesture from one of
those agencies and are filled with
the darkest forebodingS, L just
keep cool, calm and collected
and seek the brighter side of
the situation.
l always feel that things cam
not possibly be as bad as peo-
pie make out. l say TO myself:
"Runyon, there Is probably
reason for this maneuver that
is wholly harmless. Restrain
yourself from joining in the
whooping until you consider all
phases of the matter"
This attitude has prevented
me from bawling out many an
official and many an action of a
governmental bureau that has
aroused more premature persons
TO a frenzy of apprehension. as
for instance the suggestion from
the moving picture division of
the Owl that it be shown story
treatments and rough cuts" or
practically completed pictures.
that il may decide whether or
not the pictures are inimical 10
the war effort.
Detroit evening times., 1943-01-08

SOONG FOUNDA-
Nl TION, honoring the First
Lady of China, established by
her many friends in this coun-
try. has been given further
impetus by Wellesley College
alumnae on her arrival here 25
years after her graduation.
TWO Japs, former students in
l. the United States, are re-
ported handling the 12,000-man
Jap invasion army units in
Northern Japan.
These men would specialize in
follow up, after combat
troops, in communicating radio
stations, telephone switchboards,
gasoline stations, highways, rail-
ways, bus lines and power
houses.
One is 1t. Henry Shimanouchi,
a former San Francisco resident,
and as of Dec. Z, 1941, in charge
of Japan's so-called cultural So
ciety in Rockefeller Center.
The other, Capt Frank Mat
sumoto, was athletic director OF
Waseda University in Toxic.
who entertained visiting Ameri-
can college and professional ath-
leuc teams.
4 BICYCLE. the chief means
"a of transportation in Shang-
hal, now costs $4,000 in
Chinese currency.
The Japs, pre-Pearl Harbor,
were the worlds largest bike
manufacturers, making them
from processed American scrap
at So apiece and selling them
on n one-year instalment plan
10 the natives OF Indo-China.
Siam and Malaga.
Toxic has an estimated q
200, 900 bicycles.
Few have coaster brakes,
which are the costliest part.
J The ingenious Jap manufac-
turers decided To leave off the
expensive part-if you want 10
stop, fall off.
CIR GEORGE SAMSON. one
~ Of the few British officials
really familiar with Japan, has
been appointed economic expert
on Far Eastern affairs TO the
British Embassy in Washington.
His counterpart in the Ameri-
can embassy in Toxic was Frank
Starr Williams.
Both Sir George and Frank
Williams were outstanding su-
thoritieS on Japan's plans for
war-but few wanted TO listen
TO them. especially the cotton
people who were selling the JapS
on credit and wanted Williams
10 help collect their bills,
CHFAP politicians in Kings
" County Seattle, WASH,
Detroit evening times., 1943-01-08
First Lady
Film Censor

4 TREATMENT is not one OF
n the six patches of reading
matter 1 would take with me
into exile on desert island, and
the preference of the lads of the
MPD of the OWL for this truck
would show that they are true
movie fans, even without their
expressed desire to view rough
cuts" which are pictures not yet
trimmed and polished for the
public.
/ suppose the boys are so avid
for film fare that they just can
not wait for the completed re-
suit.
So you see the whole thing
was a tempest in a teapot.
though l am glad that it gave
the MPD of the owl the OPP
portunity of denying any thought
of censorship. because the only
person who should be permitted
to censor the movies is Mrs.
Roosevelt.
She would probably be highly
acceptable in that role to the
picture makers, as they might
then be able TO get in their, pic
lures some of the strong words
that our own movie cenSors re-
Gently eliminated from an Eng
liSh picture. but which Mrs. r.
thought were all right as they
lay.
Copyright. 1919. BY King Features
Distributed by International News Service
Detroit evening times., 1943-01-08
Married Love
Inspired Poem

the Talking Dog, appeared at
Hammerstein's Victoria IN New
York years ago.
didn't see this act but have
been told that this pup had a
vocabulary Of about nine words
which could be plainly UNDER
stood.
THE Japs dedicate each year
L to one ef the - signs -nIthe=
Zodiac. Nineteen forty-two was
the year of the horse. Nineteen
forty-three is the year OF the
goat. But what is most inter-
eSting TO me is that l91l, when
the Japs attacked Pearl Harbor.
was the year of the snake.
World War I cost the United
States a total Of $4,000 600, 900.
Now the United States IS
spending $10o,000,000000 a year
on war.
Germany is spending about
$4,000, 100000 annually and
Britain $20,000,000, 600 in the
same period.
The JapS are spending about
S5,00O,000,000 a year for war.
Now / have a reader whose
name is Memory.
/ also have readers named
Faith, Hope and Charity.
The city of Los Angeles once
had three adjoining streets
named Faith, Hope and Charity.
Only Hope street remains.
The people who lived on
Charity street couldn't stand be-
ing ribbed about the name and
demanded a change.
/ don't know why they
changed the name of Faith
street.
A M ASKED what I think Of
"A Robert Louis Stevensons
statement:
"If they only married when
they fell In love most people
would die unWed.
1 believe Mr.. Stevenson vas
wrong in saying that the ma
jority of married people were
not in love when they married.
It is my understanding that
about AZ per cent of women who
marry are not what you might
call madly in love with their
husbands.
This is probably due to the
fact that all women want TO be
married and if they can't marry
the man they love they will
marry a man they like rather
than become an old maid.
On the other hand about SO
per cent of men are really in
love when they marry.
Copyright, 1s43, by King Features
Detroit evening times., 1943-01-08
WAR. not necessity, Is the
W mother OF invention.

MAR not necessity, Is the
W mother OF invention.
Civilization slips back when
the shooting starts, but Science
has a field day. While they are
working ON projects which Will
kill. the little men in the white
coats and goatees always STUN
hle across things which make
living softer between wars.
They peck in Bunsen burner
here. They try new plastic
there, and before you know IL
Whey come up with something
that adds 10 the sum OF human
comfort.
It's working out that way
now. Already the advertise
ments are limiting at the marvel
Gus things-to-be when this war
is over. The advertisements ex-
plain that they can't be ex-
plotted now. because Of the war
effort, but that just as soon as
peace comes we Will be able 10
look around buildings, NOW the
lawn by pulling switch, and
take fleas off the dog by remote
control
Detroit evening times., 1943-01-08
Calling All
Inventors

WHILE you're about II, YOU
w can heat the floor TOO. That
IS one part Of a house that
should be heated. From Cam
on down, men have plopped out
OF bed and had their toes curl
up like anChovleS on touching
a cold floor.
And what about the business
men who call YOU by telephone
when you're busy (well as busy
as they are. anyhow and have
a secretary say:
MIR. So-and-so? Just n min
ute, please. Mr.. This-and-that
would like 10 talk To YOU"
Then Mr.. This-and-that takes
ID minutes 10 get 10 the phone.
There must be some sort of
plastic hammer that can fall
from the ceiling and strike both
secretary and business man
back of the mastoids and stun
them permanently.
It's good thing YOU can't
shoot people over the telephone,
else ! would have more notChes
on my gun than Billy the Kid.
A ND. what about these in
"A ventions:
Something that will enable
YOU 10 put on wet bathing suit
without getting those all-over
chills with galloping gooSeflesh.
No matter how warm the day.
a wet bathing suit has temper
ature Of 10 below.
Toast that won't burn.
a bowtie that Will tie, and I
don't mean those ready-tied
things that make YOU look like
as If you had just jumped out
of a gift box, or were ready 10
start a long, cross country bus
ride.
A radio personality who talks
over the air as ne does at home.
There is no rule against talking
naturally, but no one does il.
kaltenborn clips and sighS.
David Ross sounds like an cx-
pectant heifer. Swing is so nat
ural he isn't. Elmer Davis is
the same.
Lowell Thomas gives the i'm
preston that he is broadcasting
from the back of Lawrence of
Arabia. which would be all right
If his listeners didn't know that
he wasn't doing anything of the
sort.
EVEN President Roosevelt
- isn't natural. | have never
talked to the PreSident-as n
matter Of fact l have never
talked TO any President-but
Mr.. Roosevelt never would have
been elected had he talked in
conversation as he does over the
air.
If he had given those ward,
county and state leaders. that
beautiful cross between Groton
and Albany. he would still be
the assistant secretary of the
navy.
At tomorrow's matinee We
will have "Charleys Aunt"
Dstnbutsd BY heNsught Syndicate, Inc
Detroit evening times., 1943-01-08

women informs me they have
started a Donate Your Sus-
penders" drive.
Seems girls must have gar
ters, but the material 10 make
them Is scarce.
The ladies say they can make
effective garters from sus-
penders and that men don't
really need the braces as they
can wear belts.
So, sir, if you wear sus-
penders why not turn them over
TO your wife, sweetheart or
secretary?
QUERIES from clients:
0 Q-So it's hard TO win a
cigar from you is it? Well, you
claim to be a Dodger fan, so
I'll bet you a cigar you can't
tell me in what years Tim Jor-
dan and Phil Lewis played for
the Dodgers; in what positions
and where they came from.
Aim Jordan played first
base. Phil Lewis was a shcrt-
stop.
Don't know where Jordan
came from. Lewis was a Cor
nell graduate.
/ don't remember what years
they played.
guess you have won half a
cigar from me.
Q-Was there ever a talking
dog in vaudeville?
Did he really talk or just
seem to be talking?
A canine billed as Dan,
Detroit evening times., 1943-01-08
Learn
To Cook

Suggestions" chapter II is
Helps for Reducers."
The rest of the book. consist
ing of 459 pages, is filled with
recipes. beginning with appetiz-
ers, passing on TO beverages,
breads. canning, picking. meats,
vegetables, desserts. fish, etc.
LOR instance, do you know the
L real way TO make meringue
crown?
This is It: 3 egg whites. s
tablespoons sugar, few grains
salt.
Beat egg whites stiff, but not
dry.
Gradually add sugar and salt,
beating constantly.
Pile m eringue in ring on
creased 9-inch pie plate.
Place in shallow pan OF warm
water.
Bake in moderate oven 1925
degrees F. 20 minutes. Cool.
p. S.-Don't write and ask me
where you can get a Pocket
Cook Book: you can get the
pocket books at any drug store,
railway station. newsstand. book
store Of dry goods store in the
United States.
Detroit evening times., 1943-01-08
QUESTIONS. ANSWERS

ct B.-I have been having
headaches for some time that
start at the top of the head
and go down the back to the
neck.
/ thought II might be caused
by my high blood pressure.
Is there anything l can do?
Answer-High blood pressure
frequently produces a headache
of this character.
would treat il with ordinary
headache remedies and follow
a diet low in nitrogen sub
stances. such as meat, eggs,
milk, etc.
A. c., Detroit, Mich.-Is II
possible 10 cure a heart mur-
mur? What relation does a
heart murmur have TO high
blood pressure?
Answer-Many heart murmurs
which occur during anemia or
after a debilitating illness dis
appear.
There is no necessary relation
Of heart murmur 10 high blood
pressure.
Detroit evening times., 1943-01-08

1t. Com. Walter Winchell
is temporarily on duty out
OF the country, Meanwhile,
"On Broadway" is being
written by guest oolumnists.
Today's guest is James r.
Young. reporter who was l3
years in Toxic for J. N. S.
Detroit evening times., 1943-01-08

have been smiling. bowling and
handshaking for japanese votes.
Seattle is the center Of Amer
leans who are pro-Japanese, in
cluding some well-known bank
ers and missionary folk.
Some one in Seattle is holding
out on Jap convictionS-so far
no satisfactory convictions
whereas federal prepared cases
in other cities. with similar evi-
dence, have been successful.
CHILEANS are being told by
~ the Jap ambassador down
there that if their country breaks
with the Axis. Japan will bomb
the long shore line.
Japan for years was one Of
Chile's great nitrate buyers.
In return the Chileans OBJ
tanned Jap cotton piece goods.
pottery, rayon, uniforms and
military equipment
Boatloads Of Chilean nitrate.
sold by a British controlled com
pany. went 10 Japan in return
for munitions and agriculture.
Now We must use nitrate on
the JapS in the Pacific.
Just as our oil and gasoline
Detroit evening times., 1943-01-08
-WincheIling for WaIte

Trade Mark Registered. Copyright isas
Detroit evening times., 1943-01-08
Ry T.. v. DurIing

Dis,rIbuted by King Features synd.. Inc.
Evening star., 1943-02-07

n lll ~ = = |I|i & 81 " Z u ,
:ss1l ~
4 s!s1 ]! I
4 ~ = / y Is
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Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1943-12-17
GIRL MAKES 6-7-IO

HERE AND THERE Flora
Ryan made the 6-7-i0 as Sophie
outlay shot DPS and $40 and two
new records in the ST Dominic's.
, Joe Rybcrg fired 203-227-236
for 666 in the Chene- Trombly 500
William Rybarz speared 253
in the Van Dyke House John
Skladzicn'S Gal and julius IA
minski'S 236 stood out in the
Metro Catholic.
Clarence Myers. 1S-year-old
Central High student. produced
the first 600 and Hopp Five the
first 900 in CaSS SchlaffS Bows
League Myers tipped 232-217-
l73 for go Ethel Heenan' S
223, Marcella Wander Velde'S 2l1,
Pearl Allies 203-2ll and Lillian
Provencals POS featured in the
Rainbow Ladies Major.
For the largest organization
affiliated with the Womcns IN
ternational Bowling Congress De
troit is making a sorry showing
in the Wings Of Mercy campaign.
All sanctioned leagues are
supposed 10 donate John
Pavals 229 and Leo Nadeaus 610
shared honorS as Press hit 1926
for a new mark in the Motors
Metal
Az CroftS and Don" Wcir's
244s topped the Twentieth Cen
fury House o.. Frank Huber
rolled 242 in the Beacon House.
Ray Evans 23S in the Macomb
All-Star Dick Picton $50 i'm
the Cadillac UAW-C1O Herb
Matthews 233 in the Centennial
House Al Mikonczyk 613 in
the Ternstedt Aircraft and
Walter Smith %! in the West
Side American Legion.
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1943-12-17
Prep Grinders
Receive Honors

Appropriate finishing touches TO
the successful seasons of the
FordSon and ST Anthony High
football teams were made al ban
quets honoring the squads last
night,
A gathering Of $50 persons paid
tribute TO Fordson'S unbeaten and
united squad, featured by numer-
Gus presentations. Each member
of the Tractor squad was given
gold football by the board of edu-
cation.
In turn, the FordSon squad pre-
scented each Of coaching staff.
Head Coach Mike Savage. Russ
Californian, Ray Parker and Bill
Webber. with a plaque The play
CTS also gave Savage, a former
FordSon gridder himself, with a
trophy Fritz Crisler. l.. of NJ
coach, was the principal speaker
81, Anthony paid tribute 10 it's
first division champions Of the
Catholic League and Brother
Henry koSalko, who took over the
coaching duties last fall. Eight
cen members Of the squad are
seniors Joe Deinhart. Purdue
line coach, was the guest speaker.
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1943-12-17
Death Takes
Billy Hayes

BLOOMINGTON, Ind, Dec. II
GNS)-Friends of f. c. Billy
Hayes, one of the coungy's great
track coaches, mourned his death
today.
Hayes, who brought track cham
pionships and athletic glory to
two schools, Indiana University
and Mississippi State College died
in Bloomington Hospital after a
short illness of pneumonia follow
ing an attack of influenza.
Members of the Indiana foot
ball team were ready TO give their
blood for a TRANSMISSION. but Hayes
died before one could be given.
He was 80 at his death.
He came 70 Indiana after acting
as coach AT Mississippi State from
1912 10 1924 At the two schools
he developed nine men who made
the Olympic teams and he him.
self was coach of the 1896 squad.
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1943-12-17
Bob Tales
La0ois May
Decide Against
Clauses
By BOB MURPHY
SPORTS EDITOR

The stationery used ny Judge
Lands IN h.s official capacity
as commissioner Of our national
pasume, bears Tho simple bet
VASTLY significant legend :;
Baseball
Today ift rs perhaps FiaNaf he
fore ir his regime Of almost a
dusrfer of a century that
letterhesd means exactly what
II saws The Judge is Mr. Base
ball nothing less
Re receives q salary OF
So 600 per year 10 safeguard
the best interests of the game.
He IS the sole Judge Of what
constitutes tho best interests
a. the game" His power Is
complete, tyrannical and un-
challenged
Hc IS untouched by any in
nuencc or pressure He is the
final court Of appeal for the
most obscure player or the
wealthieSt maEnate. He treats
EN- all alike
The last few weeks have seen
? striking demonstration Of his
power. He ouStcd Bill Cox,
owner Of the Phillies. for bet
ting on ball games. He effee-
lively throttled an incipient
instruction Of the high minors
against his rule.