Evening star., 1943-09-18

ful-lookins men In the United States
today. Regardless Of age, these
gentlemen have firm jaws. clear
eyes, perfectly nodded features.
They are always rusgedly masculine.
but at the same time there is 4
kindliness that emanates from every
one Of them.
I have never met any of these
men personally, but would certain
ly like to. would like them to drop
by of an evening, drape themselves
gracefully against the mantlepiece,
and, with their unmistakable charm
tell me Of their experiences in high
finance and international politics.
Why one Of the major political
parties has never drafted these men
for high ONCE is . mystery to me.
With their poise, culture, and level
headedness they couldn't miss doing
fine job for their country.
Shortcut to Success.
The obvious conclusion to draw
from these ads Is that q sure short
cut to success Is to imbibe freely Of
any Of these brands that these men
recommend. Before you know it,
you'd be living in q lovely home,
with beautiful paintings on the wall
and running around with perfectly
delightful set of people who dress
beautifully and want for nothing.
The ads also indicate that drink
ing the proper hooch will settle the
servant problem in any home. These
men are always being waited on by
faithful retainers, whose happy
countenances show that they love
their masters and their mistresses
and wouldn't be lured away by q
defense job even II offered $40 an
hour and the right to strike three
days week with time-and-a-haK
pay while on strike.
Far be 1t from me to intimate
that the whisky companies are try
Ing to give = false impression Of
what their products viii do for
people. but know q lot Of people
who drink the various brands and
who haven't sky-rocketed to mad
success. Many Of them live in
rather humble hcmes. have no SER
wants. and, in some instances, and
this is hard to believe, are down.
right homely.
AS matter Of fact, I know one
man who drinks all the advertised
brands and anything else he can
get his hands on, and If you think
he Is handsome. and poised, and
genial, and well dressed, you just
ought to see him. He Is one of the
homeliest, orneriest cusses you ever
laid eyes on. And as for being a
perfect host, which these gentlemen
in the ads always are-well, firemen
draw straws to see who has to 70
In his house to answer an alarm.
at Sho' Can"
This Is being written on a train
and, to change the subject COM
pletely, let me tell you something
l just saw and heard in the waiting
room OF the Atlanta terminal sta
ton. I was sitting on those hard
pewlike benches that railroads al
ways provide for the comfort OF
their passengers, and next to me
was tough old sergeant whose hash
stripes told OF the many bitches he
had served. He was half asleep be-
hind two-day growth OF beard and
apparently paying no attention to
the ranting Of pure cracker across
the aisle. The cracker WAS hopping
mad. He was hopping at something
the draft board had done to him. It
seemed he had been called down
twice from his cabin in the hills
and twice sent back without any
action.
They can't do that to me-" he
told all within = block. Nav sir.
they can't do that to me. I'm telling
you the Army can't make me do
nothing"
At that last remark the sergeant
opened an eye. fixed 1t on the
cracker and drawled:
You're right. brother. You're
right. The Army can't make you do
nothing. But. hot almighty man, 1t
sho' can make you sorry you
didn't"
Quiet came to the terminal sta.
tion and the sergeant went back to
sleep.
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Nn}ad Pn{,n;.l Nj.