Evening star., 1943-04-01
INSTALLMENT TX.

The sergeant yelled out the win
dow at me, so I dropped my broom
in the battery street and went up
stairs. He was sitting on the foot
locker, thoughtfully rubbing his chin
with the handle of his mess-kit
knife
Ralph oxford got called up to the
battery commanders Office this
morning" he said, land do you know
what the old man gave him?"
I've got pretty good idea,"
said. IF he gave him what he gave
me when I got called up, it has four
letters. starts with an h and ends
with an l."
The sergeant closed his eyes and
slowly shook his head. oxford isn't
a sore thumb to the platoon like you
are" he groaned oxford got a
bright red stripe to wear around his
sleeve"
"Oxford's no fireman." told him
you're dern' right he amt" said
the sergeant. Starting with today.
Oxford and Zuber and Rolf and
Maciejewski and Pappas and
Mihalakakos are acting corporals"
knew there must be moral to
all this, so waited for him to go on.
Nov, why couldn't you have been
one Of those six boys?" he asked.
"Me?" The idea had never oc-
Cured to me. I'm just not the
executive type. I suppose Back at
the News the boss told me that if l
stayed there go years I'd never get
promoted. I'm just not the type
that gets promoted"
Lets look at the record" said the
sergeant. He pulled his little black
notebook from his pocket.
48 Out of so.
ION the drill field Saturday morn
ing you pulled 48 boners out of so
marching commands. Everything
you did was backward.
Friday morning you fell out for
reveille without your leggins. Sat-
urday you had your leggins, but no
f1eld hat. Monday morning neither
OF your shoes was tied and none of
your shirt buttons were buttoned.
Tuesday morning it was without
leggins again."
I'm never really awake" I pro-
tested, until 10 o'clock"
you amt awake then" he scoffed,
Every Monday morning without fail
! have to wake you up at least a
dozen times. I have to look behind
all the posts around here to see
which one you're sleeping against.
You snore and disturb your classes,
tool"
He was eXaggerating there, 1 told
him, I don't snore. And I'm sleepy
only on Monday morning. The rest
OF the time I'm alert and energetic,
You're too energetic sometimes!"
he roared. Just this morning, when
the lieutenant was coaching the
platoon in rifle sighting and you
were on fatigue duty as usual! That
was pretty one! You ran up and
down the battery street % times in
80 minutes and you saluted the lieu
tenant every time you passed him!
Do you think he amt got a thing
to do but return your salutes all
morning."
Rhetorical Question.
This was evidently a rhetorical
question, so didn't answer it.
You don't salute an officer every
time you see him when you're right
there at his side practically all day.
You salute him the first time YOU
see him and the last time you're
going to see him.
And then when the lieutenant
tn 1o
then what do you do: The next
time you see him, you salute him
again and then ask him was you
supposed to salute him that time!"
He put his head in his hands and
drummed sadly on the toe of his
foot locker. He raised his head after
time and looked into the notebook
again.
/ knew what was coming next and
I edged toward the door.
And then you low-rated the mess
sergeants recipe for creamed beef
on toast and told him his chow was
the worst in the Army. And you
said you was going to start eating
in the next battery. That hurt his
feelings so bad that he burned the
potatoes for the next three meals!"
l promised to apologize to the
mess sergeant. The sergeant read
out OF his notebook for or 6 min
utes more, enumerating the things
! had consistently done wrong.
Nov, do you know" he asked
vearily, why you don't get the red
stripes when they give them out?"
L suppose I'm just not the execu-
tive type" I told him.
Definition of Mess Sergeant.
A mess sergeant, according to
military legend, is cook whose
brains have been baked out. This
does not apply to the mess sergeant
IN our battery, whose feelings are
easily hurt by cruel remarks and
who weeps tears into the mashed
potatoes when he's picked on This
Is simply the old Army definition of
a mess sergeant.
All of us rising student cooks are
eligible to become mess sergeants,
Staff Sergt. Adams told us in our
first cooking class yesterday morn
ing. Then we can sit out in the
cool dining rooms and yell back
orders for the cooks to yell at the
student cooks to yell at the kaypees
This is not the beautiful gold
bricking life that it seems. though
The mess sergeant has to make
requisitions and keep records on all
the rations, he has to make out
the menus, see that the food is pre-
pared properly and supervise the
work of the cooks, the student cooks
and the kaypees. Besides this, he
must listen to all the gripes about
his food and to the threadbare