Evening star., 1943-05-23

MHILuTy HuteT OJ
that they have this real life musical
comedy to laugh at-for out of a popula-
tion OF 100000 nearly half million are
in forced labor in Germany and at least
100000 are, as they say, under water
that is, ION the run"
Despite the dire situation they have
kept up semblance of good humor and
their spirits rise and fall with rumors of
a second front. A barometer of their
feelings is the crop of funny stories
brought by refugees from across the
North Sea. After last spring these fell
to low ebb. The Dutch thought they
had been abandoned when no second
front developed, and in the face of the
Dieppe fiasco. Now everybody in
Notwithstanding Gen. Christianson-
thinks a second front is inevitable this
year and the crop has fourished again.
Dutch Humor Returns.
Here are the latest ones brought to
England. They are, of course, Dutch
humor and may not appear SO excru-
ciatingly funny turned into English,
where some of the puns cannot be re-
produced, as in the native tongue.
The Germans lately have fattened out
considerable areas of The Hague to give
clearance for their eastward pointed
guns, but they have shipped the bricks,
furniture and plumbing appliances of
the wrecked buildings to Rotterdam for
transshipment to Germany. Among the
streets demolished is the well known
Tulip Wege," or Tulip street.
Can you direct me to Tulip street."
one asks Hague policeman.
Certainly. Go direct to Lakhavn
dock in Rotterdam, and it will be the
third freighter on the left"
Another of the latest stories is that
the Germans have won the war and that
Roosevelt Churchill and Queen Will
helmina have been hailed before Hitler
for judgment. He sentences Roosevelt to
be beheaded ard Churchill to be hanged,
but to the Queen he gives the Nazi salute
and says, Hell, Wilhelminia.'
Madame" he continues, Il have the
utmost respect for you, when I think
how you have managed these of
Dutchmen for 40 years and the trouble I
have had doing it for three"
Some of the Dutch humor is little
too subtle for the German military. They
used to have parades in which the
marching soldiers sang, "Wir fahren
gegen Engelond'-we are sailing against
England.
Small boys, appropriately prompted,
used to run beside them yelling splash,
splash, splash" to indicate their prob
able fate when they set sail.
1t was so annoying that orders were
issued against singing the song.
More of the new crop Of stories gath
cred here:
"A man wanted to commit suicide.
He took pills, but these were substitutes
and failed to act. He then took a rope
to hang himself, but the rope broke be-
cause it was made of substitute ma
terial. He jumped into the water but
his cellulose suit kept him afloat. At his
wits end he went to live on his rations.
He was dead in a month"
Interpret Initials.
w. H., w. L. and w. M. are the official
markings of Army and Navy cars used
by the Germans in Holland. The Dutch
say they mean "Wij halen, VIII liegen,
VIII moorden"-"We haul, we lie, we mur-
der!"
Holland has been liberated and the
towns of Rotterdam, The Hague and
Amsterdam We'd with each other who
would look after the execution of Mus
sert," just another story "They came
to an agreement that all the three towns
would take part in it. A fuse was laid
from Rotterdam over The Hague to Am
sterdam, to the Amsterdam stadium,
where Mussert had been put on heap
of dynamite. Rotterdam was to fire the
fuse, The Hague provided it and Amster-
dam was to prepare the heap of dyna-
mite. On the appointed day the fuse
was fired tremendously in Rotterdam
and the spark slowly crept along and
travelled past The Hague to Amsterdam
In the stadium of Amsterdam there were
many more people than there had been
ever before for football match, to see
the end of Mussert. Suddenly the spark
entered the stadium and slowly travelled
to the heap of dynamite. Everybody was
looking intently. Everybody enjoyed the
desperate state Mussert was in. Sud-
denly, when the spark was 3 or yards
from the heap of dynamite an Amster-
dam urchin rushed from the rank of
spectators and at the very last moment
put his foot down and extinguished the
spark and said: We'll have that all over
again."
"A Dutch boy coming home with q
poor school report and with particularly
bad marks for German was told by his
father: Never mind my boy. Within a
year German will be dead language.
anyway"
A Na1 hawking the Nazi daily people
and Country" on bridge in the Dutch
town Of Gronlngen was thrown into the
canal and when he cried out for help