The Apache sentinel., 1943-12-17

has been (and is being) lavished on
the postwar period by thought-lav-
ishers, but few problems have re-
ceived as much attention as the one
of how the world is going to spend
the day to which most of us are
looking forward-the Day The War
Ends, the Day of Surrender:
Irwin Shaw in "Stars and Stripes"
lavishes bit of thought on that
great day a-coming :. Says Shaw
tits going to start slowly. At first
the men are going to climb out of
the foX-holes, brushing the mud off
a little and just looking around,
ready to duck back fast, in case it's
all a gag. Then it's going to sink
in suddenly and the Army'll start
for Paris, London and MinSk, for
Tripoli and Berlin, for Kansas City
and Calcutta, for Yokohama and
Seattle, for Archangel, Belfast, Co.
logne, Peking and Brooklyn.
The beer will run out in the first
hour and a half and there will be
frantic calls to Milwaukee and
Munich, but the watts there will have
been emptied in 20 minutes by the
nearest armored divisions. . Ev-
cry woman on all the seven CONT
nents between the ages of 10 and
80, not under an armed guard, will
be kissed by an American before
sunset. BY pm. there will be
no more whiskey and the Army will
go seriously into its wine period BY
$50 the first argument about who
won the war will have begun and
$500 Americans, Chinese, British,
Australians, uSSianS, French,
Greeks, Czechoslovaks, and Cubans
will be under treatment for shock
and contusionS. The MP's will
have mysteriously disappeared from
the streets and will be discovered
three days later huddling in air raid
shelters.
Fifteen Americans led by a T/5I
will drive up to Berchtesgaden in
an amphibious jeep, ropes in their
hands, only to find that 100000
Germans had assembled there in
an orderly manner and cut A. Hit
Ter into 100000 equal parts.
AAAA VAAOSLcQ11Q L 90 Will
solemnly swear at pm. never to
travel again by anything more rap
id than the Erie Railroad and never
to go up more than three stories in
any building. At dusk party
of soldiers will be seen off the coast
of Africa on a raft made of oil bar
rels, sailing strongly toward Ho-
bOken. .. Eleven hundred and fif-
teen soldiers on the verge of mar
riage to native girls, will decide they
can hold out for another couple of
months, and will say, Lets not do
anything rash" in French, Arabic,
Chinese and Hindustani. -, Sec
ond lieutenants will suddenly be-
come very polite toward privates
from their home towns whose faith
erS own good businesses there. !
An unspecified number of top SER
geantS will tear off their stripes SO
that they can join in the singing at
the bars without fear of death. -.
AT the Signal Corps OCS att
Monmouth, NJ, the class that was
to have been graduated the follow
ing Thursday will be confined to the
barracks for having cheered once
in manner not befitting Officers
and gentlemen, when they heard
the news that the war was over :.
Three Arabs will wash in celebra-
ton and their wives will not recog-
nize them and one of them will be
bitten by his own dog.
"In the park in Munich, young
lance corporal who was thought to
be crazy by his mates will get up on
a soap box and declare that the
German Army was never really
beaten, it was betrayed from behind
by a large number of Eskimos who
had insidiously wormed their way
into key positions in the German
government. The listeners will ap-
plaud wildly.
by IL am. next day all the as
pirin will be gone"
-. But whatIl that matter, if the
worlds biggest headache-the war
is also gone?
Thinking out loud: The way the
Sentinels went week before last was
simply nobody's business--but the
WACs! They enjoyed their issue
and needed no coaXing to SEND
THE SENTINEL HOME" The
infanticipating in the households of
Lit. Col l. C. Myers and Capt. Paul
A, Larnoure is over; and it's