Evening star., 1943-02-03

the finest work Id the world.
don't want to play second fiddle to
. Job. I don't want my wife's en-
ployer to be the most important
man In her life. I want to be the
one on whom she lavishes her
blandishments and whom she Is
always On her tiptoes trying to
please.
Ever since I left home, when
was . lid, TO seek my fortune /
have been knocking around In
boarding houses, hotels and clubs,
and know Ill about hall bedrooms
and parlor suites and cafeterias
and hot-dog stands and. beaneries,
Is well Is swanky restaurants where
1t costs IS just to. look ct the head
waiter. And I know just how lone
some It Is TO 50 home ct night TO
dark room where there Is not even
= cat to rub against you and purr
. welcome. ! know, when you are
too tired to be hungry, how you
can read q menu from top to bot
tom and over again without finding
: single thing on 1t that doesn't
sicken you to even think about
eating.
ALSO I know that there Il Just
one worse thing than the alleged
gay life Of the bachelor and that is
to be married before you can afford
the price. and have the mortgage
on the vine-wreathed cottage always
about to become due and . wife
who has lost her good looks and her
Vayety through overwork and anxi-
ETY. and who has gotten shabby and
peevish and fretful, and two or three
messy kids underfoot, howl.ng and
screeching, whose noses always need
to be wiped and whom nobody has
had the heart, or the time, or the
strength to train.
THAT kind Of married life isn't
my dish. When marry I don't
want to sell any poor, trusting girl
down the river to q lifetime Of
slavery to pots and pans and peram-
bulators. I want to make things
easy for her. I want to be able to
give her good times and pretty
clothes and for her to be able to
keep herself dolled up and easy to
look at. And when I come home
at night I want the house to be gay
with lights and q fresh, rested wife
to meet me with a glad, sweet smile.
I don't want one who is so worn
out with doing q hard days wash
Ing that her nerves are 50 on edge
that she is ready to snap my head
on II I say 1t is q pleasant day.
Neither do want to find house
that is as dark as a dungeon, with
not even q. smell Of cooking coming
from the kitchen and with a note
from Friend Wife propped against
the library table saying that they
are taking stock at the store and
she won't be home before midnight
or that she has had to 60 to Osh-
kosh with the boss to see about q
new contract. So that is why I have
never married. I am waiting until I
can afford the price of a wedding
ring"
Well" I reminded him, "you
know the durability of a wedding
ring doesn't depend on the size of
the diamond. I have seen some 10
carat ones that got lost or mislaid
almost before the honeymoon ended,
and I have known others where the
stones were mere pinpoints they
were SO small but still were gleam-
Ing brightly after so years Of hard
usage.
1T IS q queer thing" went on,
that a mans idea Of being good
to woman and making her happy
Is to keep her in idleness. Millions
Of devoted husbands work them
selves to death so their wives won't
have anything to do but to kill
time, yet they have only to look
about them to see that they could
wish no greater curse upon the wom-
en- they love.
"The only contented women are
those who are doing some useful,
constructive work. The wife OF any
successful man will tell you that
the happiest time of her life is not
when she has nothing to do but be
bored trying to amuse herself but
when she was toiling. day and night,
at her husbands side helping him
to get q start. 1t is the wives who
have nothing to do but vivisect their
| emotions who 1ind that their hus-
| A IN