Evening star., 1943-01-23
McLemore-
Loses Himself
In Revolving Door
By HENRY McLEMORE.

There is as nasty a little con-
troversy as you ever saw in your
life going on IN New York City.
Friends are lined up against friends,
brothers against brothers, and sweet
hearts against beaus.
The cause OF the controversy is
the revolving door Yes, the plain.
old-fashioned revolving door. which,
up until now has had to depend on
the old gag Il met my girl in re-
volving door and have been going
round with her ever since" for its
publicity.
The anti-revolving doorers say it
is an out-moded engineering device
that constitutes menace to public
safety, particularly in times of fire,
and that to have one in building
is no less dangerous than engaging
the services of DR.. Crippen as a
family physician.
The pro-revolving doorers (all OF
whom have written letters to the
editors) insist that the revolving
door Is essential to the welfare and
happiness of the American people.
and that to tamper with it would be
just the same as copy-reading Lin
coins Gettysburg address, or allow
ing beer advertisement to be
printed on Plymouth Rock, or hiring
a Davey Bell surgeon to put sutures
in the crack of the Liberty Bell
I don't like to enter this con-
troversy. but I am going to for the
sake of national unity. In times
like these. the United States can
not afford to have any discordant
factions. We must all pull together.
even the anti-revolving doorers and
the pro-revolving doorers. "a,
Calls for Technique.
! My belief is that the fault lies
not with revolving doors, but with
the people who use them. There
never has been any Standardization
of revolving door technique. Every
man has his own way of approach
ing revolving door, going through
it, and getting out of it. The same
is true of women and children.
This makes for confusion of the
utter sort.
There is the man who goes
through revolving door as if he
were shot out of a cannon. He
approaches the door on a dead run.
filings himself into the device, drives
with all his power against the panel
in front of him. Those in front of
him are propelled onto the side
walk as If some giant, unseen
bouncer had grabbed them by the
necks and given them the oil toss.
Those behind him have no alterna-
tive. They must either accelerate
their pace to wild run or get
smacked from behind by the swirl
ing door.
A revolving door calls for team
work-the sort of teamwork that
makes for a winning crew or foot
ball team. 1t is no place for in
dlviduality. Let one person in the
door assert his personality and the
revolving door becomes a sort of
dry-land ST. Lawrence whirlpool,
capable of near destruction.
Just as much of a menace as the
mile-a minute revolving door user
Is the snail type Those of the
snail type enter the door as if they
were heavily laden burros nego-
tiating an exceptionally difficult bit
OF mountain terrain. 1 have even
seen them come to full stop while
half way through the door and gaze
around as if admiring the scenery.
and heaven knows there are no
sights OF grandeur to be seen. or
historical points to be visited, inside
revolving door.
Shutting Drones.
Then there is the revolving door
drone, who refuses to do his share
IN swinging the panels around. He
neither pushes nor shoves, but just
shuff1es along, depending on those
In front and behind him to do the
manual labor. Occasionally three
or four drones will get in the same
door, and 1t comes to a halt.
Another revolving door menace Is
the man or woman lin fact. it's
usually a woman) who tries to
squeeze through an opening that is
too small, You know, the little
space that is left just before one
of the panels reaches the fixed part
Of the door. This type is as bother
some as the timid creature who
won't get in the door untfl he has
made reservations for space Just as
he would on Pullman, or thoss
jolly, laughing dopes who think it
Is great fun to snuggle close to one
another and go through two or
three at a time.
NO, there's nothing wrong with
the revolving door, any more than
there is anything wrong with the
world. They're both all right. It's
the people, the likes of you and me,
that get revolving doors and the
world into bad repute. If we'd only
straighten up, the world would
straighten up, too
Nice little sermon. what?
| distributed by McNaught Syndicate, Inc.)