The Wilmington morning star., 1943-10-08
By WEsTBROOK PEGLER


dened with worry these days, it might interest
you to know that same can be attended to
promptly and neatly by professional of long
experience, meaning me. l have been in this
business for about 10 years and my many
contented clients have sent me very compli-
mentary testimonials, which may be seen by
appointment. No worry is too insignificant
for my attention nor large enough to daunt
me, and my range of topics has included the
future of the Tunney-Muldoon trophy symbolic
of the heavyweight championship of the world,
the fairest gem in fistianas bauble, as the
late Leo P. Flynn used to call it. and the Sc
curity Of Singapore. The last time / saw the
gem in the bauble, it had been showed back
in corner under the stairs in Madison Square
Garden and l needn't tell you what happened
to Singapore I think I should explain that
I do not guarantee favorable results. I just
worry and the results just happen independ-
emily.
At the present moment I have many Or
ders on hand from clients desiring me to
worry over the impending coal shortage for
them and l may say that as is my custom
in servicing multiple orders, I put them in
hamper and do them in a batch. 1t is a
system not unlike that of a little boy of my
acquaintance who prays specifically and by
name for his parents and other members of
the family, but blankets the rest of his fell
lowmen in a general petition. l believe the
coal shortage is going to be very severe and
l am really going to town on this issue, and
it seems shame that, with the case in the
hands of an expert, others should waste their
energies on it. They might just m s S it
around
I have found in my long experience that it
is possible to worry very fast and in the
course of very few minutes when I am hav-
ing a real good day, can polish off our future
relations with Russia, the menace of COM
munism in Canada, the new income tax pro-
posals of Mr.. Morgenthau, the indecency of
the Wagner act and the postwar world.
l started with little bits of worries, such as
flunking long division, and whether my old
man would be canned in the annual pre-
Christmas massacre when he was a reporter
in Chicago l funked the long division sew
eral times and do such problems nowadays
strictly with matchsticks, but my dad never
was canned you see, while some worry
is justified, much of it is sheer waste. I guess
it is something like farming. You can't tell
what the crop is going to be but you have
to keep on trying.
Because I am an entrepreneur, as they
used to call the proprietor of peanut stand
or lunch wagon back in the days OF the NRA,
am able to worry long hours without inter-
ference from any government department. On
40-hour week, I would soon be swamped
with business and a very helpful service to
the public would be badly obstructed My
system is to start worrying as soon as wake
up, usually about some carry-over problems
from the day before, either personal or public.
l next take look at the papers and pretty
soon the mail arrives, hundred or more
letters in batch, and l then spit on my
hands and really get going. My clients lately
have sent me many orders for worry on the
subject of manpower shortage at time
when the union racketeers are oVermannlng
many jobs, and wasting men, mostly dunn
mics to be sure, on mock work; and let me
say that my performance on this one has
been uncommohly fast, thorough and polished
but there have been so many repeat orders
that have had to attend to them IN several
huge patches.
A friend of mine, an amateur, tells me
that he sets aside one hour every evening
for worry but. while he is very earnest, he
is after all an amateur and something of a
plodder at that and have known him to put
in a whole weeks worrying time on nothing
but the soundness of his insurance policy.
Such individual worry is very Wasteful, as
you can see. when 1 am at your service to
worry about the whole great problem of in
surance in connection with Initiation and es-
tate taxes. 1 worry standing up, sitting down
or walking and while do not ike to boast,
I may say that bar no topic. just phone,
write or wire and state your worry.
-V
Victory is ahead. Lut it is the considered
judgment of our military leaders that we still
have a long hard fight.-Undersecretary of
War Robert P. Patterson
The U. S. troops) all wanted to know
whether they would have jobs. Ihey took a
tremendous interest in the kind of world we
are going to have after the peace. - Mrs.