Evening star., 1943-04-12
INSTALLMENT 20.

many bull sessions, too many hours
spent at the Service Club and too
much time spent flirting with that
cute little waitress at the delicates-
sen in Fayetteville. Tonight, Pvt.
Hargrove, you will take this inter-
esting and improving book, read 1t
until lights out and 60 to bed
promptly at o'clock"
There was a little back talk, a
little argument, a little entreaty.
However, the forces of truth and
progress prevailed. Immediately
after supper adjourned to the
squadroom. arranged myself COM
fortably on my bunk and dug into
the interesting book. Peace and
quiet held sway about me.
AS luck would have it, this same
sudden decision toward a quiet eye
ming at home struck several fellow
members of the squadroom at the
same time. Six or seven nearby
hunks sported occupants who usual
~ disdained the comforts of home
until at least 9 o'clock Books were
brought out from the foot lockers,
pens and papers made their appear
ance, and one ambitious and ener-
getic flower of the Nation even got
out his shoe polish and went to
work.
PVT. Wesley Sager, late of Am
sterdam, N. Y, grew weary of the
quiet. Yawning widely, he rolled
over In bed and with sudden swoop
yanked the pillow from beneath the
head of Pvt. Melvin Hart. "Yip-
pee" screamed Pvt. Sager, tossing
the pillow across the squadroom
to willing accomplice. "Yippee, :"
screamed the willing accomplice,
tossing the pillow back to Pvt. Sager.
Pvt. Hart rose and retrieved his
pillow with dignity and formality.
He placed it on his bunk, smoothed
It and laid his head upon it. Three
privates sighed in resignation. The
hcorrigibles were at it again.
5 Pvt. Sager lay quiet for a while.
Then he broke into loud, regular,
but unconvincing snore. The three
signing privates did not return to
their occupations, but lay in philo-
sophie expectation. Once the boys
N that corner got started, nothing
but physical exhaustion could stop
them.
Relaxed Vigilance.
Pvt. Sager turned as if tossing in
his sleep. Pvt. Hart noted the move
and held his book ready to strike
II a hand came toward his pillow.
Pvt. Sager turned again, facing
away from Pvt. Hart, and Pvt. Hart
relaxed his vigil. When he did, the
hand shot out once more and the
pillow sailed across the room and
into waiting arms.
Again Pvt. Hart retrieved the pill
low and again he lay down. Why"
he asked, must you behave like a
2-year-old infant? Can't YOU act
like normal adult?"
Sure I can" Pvt. Sager replied.
KINDLY step outside with me and
put up your fists"
Pvt. Hart gave vent to a quiet
and gentlemanly oath. Please do
me the honor to shut your mouth"
he requests: II should like to read
without the clamor Of your big yap
roaring in my ears"
This is but the opening gun. Al
most daily it marks the beginning
OF a half-hour session of busters,
threats extravagantly insulting re-
marks. and repeated invitations
from each side for the other to step
outside and settle it. Nothing ever
comes of it and soon the contending
parties tire of the play.
Silence reigns again, but it's throne
Is shaky Pvt. Hart tires of his book
and turns to Pvt. Sager Were
you at the dance last night when
the redhead got started telling what
she thought of Jim Carney's dane
ing?"
Pvt. Carney picks up the bait.
Anything Hart says about me or
about what anybody else says about
me is entirely fictitious, and any re-
semblance to persons living or dead
Is coincidental and not intended"
Pvt. Sager sits up suddenly in bed.
Don't talk like that about Hart"
he says in quiet, serious and
menacing voice. Anything you say
about Hart is personal insult to
me. If you're inclined to insult me,
kindly take off your stripe and step
outside with me-"
Don't you go talking like that
10 the ranking first-class private of
this section" rasps Pvt. Hart. "I
don't like your manner at all. Kind
y step outside with me while I beat
your brains out
II you want peace and quiet on
these ay-at-home nights, the best
solution is to go to the second bar
racks down the line. There's no
body down there except SO members
OF the band, who are ALWAYS re-
hearsing at this time of night.
Army's Exclusive Language.
Slang runs wild in the Army. It's
Ike disease or the liquor habit.
Among the boys who sit around on
the back steps after lights out and
bat the breeze far into the night
no simple and understandable Eng
hsh word is used where a weird and
outlandish concoction can be substi-
tuted.
Water is CT lemonade. Salt is
sand or Lots wife; pepper is specks;
sugar is sweetening compound. Milk
Is cat beer; butter, dogfat. Ketchup
is blood. In the untiring imagina-
ton of the soldier, green peas be-
come China berries: hominy grits
are glamorized into Georgia ice
cream; rice is swamp seed. Pota-
toes become Irish grapes; prunes
change to Strawberries; hot cakes
become blankets. Bread is punk
and creamed beef on toast is punk
and salve. Meat loaf and hash are
kennel rations.
1t is strictly against the code of
the Army to say a complimentary
word about the food or the cook
no matter how good the food is or
how hard the cook labors to make
1t so. Oscar of the Waldorf, in the
Army. would still be either a slum-
burner or a belly-robber.
Back at the News, the bows in
the composing room and the mailing
Ia AA