Evening star., 1942-06-08

told how Mussolhi, with the years
and the Germans creeping up on
him, had been forced to resort
TO cheating at games to main
tain his reputation for prowess at
sports. The report told how II
Duce would sneak away to a tennis
court few minutes before the spec
tators arrived, then they would hear
he had been playing for an hour or
more. 1t told how he chose his OPP
ponents from among the "yes-men"
athletes, who would purposely miss
his sissy service, his pit-pat lobs, his
oh gracious returns in general,
and who would always see to it that
he got nice, easy ball to hit.
AS hard as my heart is toward II
Duce. this pathetic effort to make a
decent showing at tennis, long after
the spring has gone from his
muscles, touched me. Touched me.
I suppose, because some of the
bounce has gone from my knees,
too and have tasted of the horrors
Of being exposed to youth on a ten
mis- court.
Film Will Prove II.
No more frightening cry to man
who has passed the 35-year old mark
can be raised than one Of Come on.
nt' Yol9y- Of
Tennis, am convinced, was de-
vised solely for the purpose of max
ing the near-middle-aged and mid
dle-aged appear in ridiculous light.
An elephant trying TO fly, a fish try
ing 10 walk, is no more awkward
than a man whose youth went out
with the Stutz Bearcat. numbering
toward the sidelines in an effort TO
fail at a tennis ball.
Men and women of 35 and up
wards, who play tennis. are certain
to take exception to this descrip-
ton. In their minds eye they pic
tlue themselves just as graceful, Just
as quick on their feet and just as
lean and 1.-the as they were when
Harding was President. But let
them have some one take pictures
of them in action on the tennis
courts and they will be convinced.
Every bulge and sag will show as
they charge" out OF breath and
putting, to the net TO make dazzling
return of the wood of their recquets.
sportsman" Mussolini.
Yes. but what about King Gustav
of Sweden, your middle-aged racquet
wielder is certain TO ask when told
that he is too old to play the game
decently? Wasn't he still playing
on his 18th or 10th birthday? Sure
he was. but even the best re-touch-
ing job couldn't keep him from
looking like skelton from medical
school out for bit Of exercise. And,
I have talked to enough Of the ten
mis- players, who have taken the
Old Boy on for a set, to know that
he had to be fed" shots that
bounced just the right height lest
he crack a royal knee or twist
an imperial joint.
Mussolini's cheating at tennis
shows that he still has control of
his faculties II not his country.
After all, Mussolini has nothing TO
lose by cheating at game. He isn't
generally recognized as a first-clasS
sportsman. After his attack on
Ethiopia and his stab in the back
of France, every one knows him to
be the type of sportsman who
wouldn't shoot a sitting bird II there
were any chance Of its lying down
and going to sleep and as one who
would enjoy fox hunting in tele-
phone booth.
His cheating at tennis also offers
proof unfortunately that he isn't
quite ready to crack up. You can't
completely discount a man who still
has enough sense to realize that no
people, not even Italian Fascists.
could respect a leader who was al
ways falling on his face chasing
backhand shot. or who was con-
tinually halting play to tuck in a
shirt that wouldn't stay put over a
bay window.
Distributed by McNauEht Syndicate, Incl