Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1942-12-08

10 1lOON1k1lk ltS
c1tisens. The
Senator has
expressed the
Henry MeLsasss belief that the
amount Of paper work the American
businessman has to do rs . deadly
menace to national morale and .
serious threat to the war effort"
Mind you, that from . Senator
who undoubtedly has q lot Of help.
ers to assist him in filling out the
snowstorm Of blanks and generally
do the dirty work. Imagine his
indignation If he were Just one Of
US common folk and had to do al
the work himself.
The chances are that Senator
Vandenberg didn't have to measure
personally every room In his house
for the fuel oil rationing question.
naire. And that, sistern and breth-
ern, is the orneriest task the Gov.
eminent has given US 70 far.
I have Just finished measuring
my little nest and only an expert
eye could tell whether I was not.
sam or jetsam or both. I haw
been on my hands and knees 50
long I am developing q bark ana
can come pretty close to under.
standing the language Of my pup,
who followed me about the house tn
what I am sure was q sympathetic
effort to teach me the proper uss
Of the front and back paws. 40
++as n
All had to measure with was
1-foot ruler Of the type that school
children carry strapped to theU
books. My house isn't a big one,
but 1t is quite 4 bit bigger than .
1-foot ruler. Before I had labor.
ously measured its rooms and halls
I wished more than once that ]
had gone straight from the church
with my bride and set up house.
keeping In q phone booth, or an
empty barrel, or q bungalow bird.
nest of the type that wrens are -
happy In. .1
I started measuring in the LIVING
room. Everything was fine at first,
like little boy playing train with
his blocks. I took of from q wall
and headed across the room. Then
I ran head on into the sofa.
My first thought was to work
around the sofa, but honesty made
me admit to myself that such q
procedure would increase the d.
mansions Of the room. Too, there
was the fear that Mr.. Ickes, on
seeing the dimensions Of my living
room, would question them, and
come down and measure them and
prove me 4 fraud.
So I decided to 60 under the sofa.
I am not . man who Is built to 20
under sofas, with or without 4
dog biting at his ankles, but I
tried it. 1t didn't work. So I
moved the sofa. Ditto the living
room table. Ditto the living room
end table. Ditto another sofa. I
was in the hauling and moving
business before I got across that
room. Then, when I started across
the other way, everything was COM
pletely In the way again. D.
%+4A
But this wasn't the worst part
Of the living room dimensions. It
was not until I had finished that
discovered that my companion
IN life, who was supposed to be
taking down the measurements a.
called them to her, had been
talking on the phone for IS minutes
and hadn't written down 4 blessed
thing. Doctors give her an even
chance for recovery.
But the living room. tough as IL
was. was a cinch to the closets. I
don't know how you treat tho
closets in your home, but ours are
put to full use. Things that should
have been thrown away as long ago
as 1900 are packed In ours.
I am quite sure that If any one
ever really explored some Of tho
closets in our home they would find,
among other things: Cd Walter
Camps first All-America football
team. CD . thimble belonging to
Betsy Ross, CD one Of Hannibars
elephants. % enough table leaves
to build = new boardwalk at At.
lantic City, and also 90 odds and
ends Of every description, ranging
from lamps made from conch shells
to . full set Of the incorporated
Bobsey Twin books.
To measure the closets I had "a
plunge fearlessly into this collection
Of closetanis. It Is Q wonder that
I got out alive.
Then, when all the measurement
were taken, came the multiplying to
get the number Of square feet bust.
ness. This was real nasty for ma,
being - was one Of those mathe.
monstrosities who never
could add : and 2 and even had Ia
have . tutor on Roman numerals
II really doesn't matter vhethe,
! get any fuel oil or not. rot %
hot measuring my house that sprtns
VIII have arrived before thor.
oughly cool Oh.
eDasssioutsd b. NeNsusht SYNDICATE. hal