Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1942-12-22

hrh1y 4asAeinoto' hiOIls qu1tc nap
PLY until your autographed book
let arrived. Soldiers, Sailors, Ma
rines. WAVES, wAACS and sPARs
nodded to me in a very friendly
manner. I haven't realized how I
had been laundering around In my
Citations with members Of the armed
forces until my large violet eyes fell
on your latest effort to keep us all
ladies and gentlemen.
Now. much to my horror, know
that the smiles the armed forces
gave me were patronizing ones-ones
that understandingly recognized the
fact that a dolt is dolt, and that
to make silk purse Of sows ear
is child's play as compared to max
ing a proper wartime host out Of
a McLemore.
Take your paragraph on how to
invite strange soldiers to your home.
Until I read it, Miss Emily, I al
ways just bumped into a soldier on
the street and said, Hey, what
about coming home with me and
having drink and bite to eat?"
veddy, veddy Gaucho.
Now know how gaucf1o I was.
I wonder why some soldier didn't
pop me in the eye and say, Listen,
Buddy. don't you know no better
than to extend an invitation In such
manner? I wouldn't think Of eat
ing your food, or sitting around the
house with you and your wife II
you don't have any better manners
than you have shown"
You make it so clear. There must
be peasant blood in my family or
would have thought about the ap-
proach you suggest myself. May
I quote you? If you haven't the
say-so, let Funk & Wagnalls sue
me. Here's what you say about
asking strange soldiers into the
home:
"If you don't know any soldiers
personally, the proper procedure is
to go see the director of USO or the
morale officer Of the camp and tell
him what you have In mind. II
might be helpful to leave writ
ten memorandum such as this: Mr..
and Mrs John Brown, "A Town road,
dinner for four soldiers every Thurs
day evening. Mr.. Brown, associate
editor of News This shows
that he would be interesting to men
who like to talk or listen.
"or, If you and your husband have
a good collection Of records-sym-
phonic or operate or swing-or il
you play or sing parts In a quartet,
say 50. In other words, tell them
whatever your special interests or
hobbies are. You might also make
note Of your Southern or New Eng
land or any other special style of
cooking"
Now, Miss Emily, you can see my
plight. If / leave my name as Mr..
and Mrs. John Brown, even q rang
er. with all his studies In rnap-read-
ing, won't be able to find my home.
I've used lot of names in my life,
but John Brown isn't one of them.
Pseudo Gothic Cooking.
Too, I've never been editor Of the
x-News. Not that wouldn't like
to be. I'd like to be editor OF any,
thing so ! could do the editing and
I could do the writing. Also, If
tell a soldier that my wife and
are half Of good quartet, I'll be
lying. We both sing in monotone
and don't know anything newer
than Drifting Along ON Moonlight
Bay" II Had Dream, Dear" Let
the Rest of the World Go By Til
We Meet Again." I've Been Work
ing on the Railroad" How DRY
I Am" and Melancholy Baby"
As for the cooking in our home.
we are one of the few families that
takes pot-luck three times a day.
and on the following day have the
leftovers from the pot-luck. To saw
our cooking is Southern is to libel
the Confederacy, and to call 1t New
England style is to make a Cabot
whirl and spin in his grave. Our
cooking comes pretty close to being
pseudo Gothic.
Now Miss Emily, how many SOL
diers would I get to come to nv
house If followed your advice and
left note like this with the Usop
Mr.. and Mrs. Henry McLemore.
two flights up in a garage apart
n1ent, dinner for four soldiers every
Thursday If they can eat it. Mr..
McLen1ore, no editor Of nothing.
VIII talk most of the evening. No
monograph. No radio. And, bows.
we can't sing.
'Dlstriouted by McNauxht Syndicate. rneN