davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1942-10-21
Trade Mark Registered. Copyright. is.l

A PATRIOTIC and popular
"a Dutch comedian joined Miss
Vincent in concentration camp
because of pulling this gag:
He'd walk out on the stage
carrying two huge Licensees OF
Hitler and Goering. and say:
~ don't know what TO do with
these. Put them against a wall
or hang them"
DOLAND has a new religious
i holiday of mourning 1t Ia
called Black Christmas"
It started Christmas Eve of
1870.
1t will never be forgotten by
those still living in Warsaw and
LODI.
That was the memorable night
when houses without coal, wood
or oil all had active chimneys
pouring out endless streams Of
black, sinking smoke.
That was the night the Poles
made Goebbels look sillier.
Weeks earlier he had an
nounced that German soldiers
would make house-to-house
canvass TO get woolens and
clothing for the German army.
The Poles took their woolens
of their backs and fed them 10
their furnaces.
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1942-10-21
Man I'm Uniform
Rates the Best

permitted, and I fear this situ-
alton has developed some cyni-
cism among the civilians.
But it must be remembered
that these characters are
greatly in the minority. and I
think the time is not far distant
when they will be shaken out OF
their security because this is one
war that cannot play any favor
ties.
And I hope 1t will be one war
from which the men who serve
their country will be remem-
bered more than a few days
after peace is declared. In fact.
I believe il will, because there
will be between 100000 and
10000, 900 men of voting age to
keep reminding the nation of
what they did.
1t will not be like other wars
when, after the soldiers returned
to the paths Of peace. they were
promptly forgotten because
there were not enough of them
to raise more than a compare
lively small voice mid the bab-
BILE of the civilian population.
This time there will be more
OF them Of vocal power than
the civilians, and If they or
ganize properly they will be a
hefty reminder for many years
TO come to the nation generally
and to politicians who may
seek TO deprive them of recog-
milton and reward for the
greatest service that men can
give their homeland. ----
Copyright. 1912. by King Features
Distributed by International News Service
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1942-10-21
International
Front

WAR correspondents, who re-
w lated all of these TO the
colyum recently, claim they
heard this in London recently:
Hitler allegedly hauled Goeb-
bells over the Goals for Topping
on the job of discrediting Presi-
dent Roosevelt.
81 did what you told me TO
do" whined Goebbels.
az accused him OF Dictator
ship. 1 blamed him for drag
cling his nation into war, and I
charged him with plotting 10 do
away with electionsw
"Dumkopfw barked Hitler.
"Get busy! Call him some
names-foul, terrible, insulting,
horrible namesw
Look" said Coebbels. "he's
been through three presidential
campaigns. They've called him
everything already"
THIS one is vouched for by a
Il high official of the Pan
American lines:
When the Germans took over
Holland, they seized the Dutch
captain of a seagoing tugboat
and commandeered his craft.
His task. they informed him.
would be to tow st ing of
barges. loaded with German sol
diers, out int the turbulent
channel each day SO they could
get used 10 seasickness, come
the invasion of England.
Day after day the little cap
tain cheerfully scorted his
unhappy cargo to the most vio-
lent parts of the channel, got
them good and i'll and brought
them back.
Finally, the captain ap-
preached the commanding off,
GERS with q suggestion.
Why not have the soldiers get
used TO actual invasion con-
ditions?
Why not take them out at
night. in<tead of day!
The officers agreed it was a
good idea.
Next night the captain took
out his string OF six barges. car
ried them near enough to the
British coast 10 insure their
drifting 10 capture and then cut
them loose.
Then he Lii out for the open
sea and kept going until he
landed in BerTnuda-where the
one-man Dutch naval offensive
is quietly plying his little tug
boat trade in Bermuda waters.
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1942-10-21
BY Henry NIcLemOre

another that was tucked in the
luggage compartment.
No, sir. He had 10 contend
first with a jack that was as
spindly ss a stalk OF celery. j,
Sometimes II took upwards OF
an hour 10 get this jack under
the axle and another hour 10
crank IL UP.
Then, hike as not, IL sagged
under the weight OF the ma
chine and slid ingloriously TO
one side, leaving the repairer
just where he started.
But even when the car was
securely hoisted into the air on
one side, the trouble had just
begun.
There was the tiros hugging
the rim like bear cub does It's
mother. and with its affection
ate embrace cemented by rust
and long months Of proximity.
The tire had 10 be removed,
and that was task calling for
the full play of all the muscles
in the body, the cunning Of a
trapper and the patience of a
Madison Square Garden full Of
Jobs.
A Ii sorts OF tools ill-fitted for
"A the task of removing a tire
came along with a car in those
days.
Great slabs OF steel with
beveled edges.
Ice-tong sort of hooks with
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1942-10-21
the Side

I seek for, one as fair and gay
But find none 10 remind me
How blest the hours passed dway
With the girl / left behind me.
Anon.
(Above song was popular with
soldiers for more than $50 years.
Soldiers don't sing IL any more.
Still. if a soldier included the
above lines in a letter To the
girl he left behind him she might
find them reassuring.-EVD).
MRS. THEODORE DE LONG
Nl BULL OF Detroit. She is
the former Anastasia Riley, one
of the most beautiful of all
glorified girls Of Mr.. Ziegfeld's
"Follies."
Those who love cats can find
a sy1npathizer in Mrs. Bull. She
has IL cats.
Anna Lee Of the cinema. In
London. Miss Lee was once de-
clared dead during an operation
when her heart stopped beating
for two and a half minutes.
But she opened her eyes much
to the establishment Of those
present and is now on the way
TO be one Of Hollywood's most
successful actresses.
Miss Lee should have a talk
with Ralph Neves, the jockey.
Ralph. after being in spill
at the Bay Meadows track in
California was declared dead.
But after this declaration he
also astonished the bystanders
by suddenly rising UP and say
ing:
1--WE got 70 get out of this
place. I've got . mount In the
eighth race"
KNOW what q Dutch Air
IN Millionaire" isf
II is a Dutch commercial air
pilot who has flown over a mil
lion miles.
Many OF these Dutch Air
Millionaires" are now engaged
in ferrying planes to the battle
areas for the United Nations.
The first Canadian woman
soldier 10 arrive in Britain was
a cute. little trick type.
She is Major Alice Sorby Of
Winnipeg, Can.
Her height is 5 feet n inches.
Would seem Major Sorby is
the logical candidate for the
president of the Canadian Little,
But. Oh My! Club.
Writes a Californian:
81 will send you n stogie II
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1942-10-21

I1AN6 di"oys oiiN NOitAhA
i ously felt sorry for Adde'S
cents.
The middle aged may moon
about the glorious carefree Pc
riod of youth, but a good deal OF
the time il is far from that.
1t is often a dreadful period OF
self-consciousness, Illustration
and adjustments that are diff
cult. sometimes impossible.
Only lately the medical pro-
fessien has focused its attention
on the adolescent and tried to
solve his problems.
~ / am interested in some re-
ports from Asheville, n. c., by
two psychiatrists who think the
general practitioner can and
should be the one to handle
these difficulties.
Most adolescents are able in
the course of time TO make their
own adjustments and when they
eventually arrive at the age of,
let us say, 20. they have found
themselves.
But there remains large
numoer who make bad adjust
ments.
THEY seldom turn into out and
u out psychiatric cases, but
they are on the borderline and
are likely to take one Of three
behavior paths: the paranoid
who believes others pick on him,
resents correction and is always
dissatisfied; the shy, seclusive
person who retires into day
dreaming and fantasy forma-
ton: and the defiant, anti-social,
offensive youth, the leader of re-
bellious groups.
All of these moods occur
mildly in all adolescents and do
little harm, but occasionally
they become fixed and are more
or less serious.
The causes. aside from the in
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1942-10-21
BY Damon RunyOn

hungry while soldiers eat, be-
cause compared with them he is
unimportant.
Let him remember only that
though he may deem his own
task of value to the war effort,
he performs 1t at home and in
safety while these soldiers are
going to far places, perhaps to
die. Let him regard them as
kings and their drab uniforms as
royal robes of faith and hope to
their country.
The civilian attitude in many
places toward the soldiers in the
early stages of our armed prepa-
ration was despicSble, the peo-
pie of some cities near which the
camps were placed openly re-
senting the boys though they
were glad to take the money
they brought in.
think this attitude has COM
pletely changed, though 1 still
see automobiles tipping past SOL
diers going the same direction
and trying to thumb short lifts
"a small thing, you may say,
but rejecting a certain lack of
feeling for the soldiers. s-,,
And / still sense a certain con.
descension in the manner of
some civilians toward the men
in uniform.
I AM aware that there are
Il characters In the service who
have eased their way, by polit-
ical pull and otherwise into seft
berths and who would fight the
war from their coy corners If
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1942-10-21
The Brighter Side

T'HE most important man in
- the United States today Is
the man in the uniform of his
country.
Let this be clearly understood
by all the people. The man in
the uniform is the big man.
nothing is too good for him.
The fat of the land must be
his.
That is why civilians must
and will be denied entirely some
of their former Injuries, while
all others will be apportioned TO
them sparingly under the ration
ing system. This is as il should
be in these times. The fighting
men must get the best Of every
thing we have.
Coffee, tobacco, sugar, meats
and hundreds of o Their things
that civilians have had as mat
ter of course. and in plenty,
must go TO the soldiers in far
greater ratio than they can be
allotted TO those not in the
service.
These things, and the finest,
the soldiers must have though il
eventually reduces the civilians
TO a mere smell of their erst-
while enjoyments.
I EFT no man not in uniform
~ complain of any curtailment
of pleasures or privileges these
days. Let him not complain that
-he-has to walk while soldiers
ride, or stand while soldiers sit,
if til a t should happen, or go
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1942-10-21
The On|ooker

DRICE Chief Leon Henderson
L missed a great chance 10
improve the nations health. as
we'll as TO get extra rubber for
war needs. when he failed 10
limit 10 four the number OF
tires 10 be allowed each car in
the country.
He made a mistake in allow
ing US 10 keep that fifth, or
spare. tire.
Forgetting for a moment what
a mountainous pile of rubber
the spares would make. let US
consider what race Of Lionel
Strongforts we would become
IL. after November %. we did
not have any spares TO fall back
on when we had puncture.,
Demountable rims and de-
mountable wheels have not been
with us so long that millions of
Americans can't re m @ m b @ r
with an ache in their backs,
p) the era when changing q
means just that--changing
lire.
IN those days. when man
L had a puncture. he stepped
out OF the car, now sagging
perilously 10 one side. and faced
an enemy worthy Of his steel.
He couldn't just jack up the
car on a ball-bearing jack. twist
a few bolts and screws. lift off
the wheel and replace il with
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1942-10-21
Youthful
Guided

herent cause OF being an Adde'S
cent. are the over-solicitous
mother who prevents the child
from growing up and hence
makes him unable to hold his
own in competition; the stern
father who sets standards too
high for the child to reach;
physical defects, magnified by
over-zealous parents and others,
which are really trivial "a COM
mon one is acne or pimples);
and relative mental dizziness in
a child who is made TO compete
with children OF higher intelli-
gence.
NOV many of these basically
involve medical problems
and it is an interesting sugges-
ton that these young people
should be encouraged to consult
a family doctor or general prac-
titioner.
Plainly, the parents are the
worst people to guide the adol-
eScent; they have often made
him what he Is.
The method the doctor uses is
explanation, reinsurance and de-
sensitization.
The adolescent must be per-
mitted 10 unburden himself COM
pletely, encouraged by tactful
questioning, and in the absence
of any disciplinary or condem-
natory atmosphere.
THE doctor is in a special po-
l. sition to rectify or explain
the minor. embarrassing physi-
cal disabilities that may be ha-
raising the patient and is in a
much better position than the
parents TO explain and discuss
the sex problems and questions
that particularly beset this pc.
riod Of life.
He may have TO try TO alter
the family situation, 10 change
certain phases of the curriculum
in school, to direct athletic ac-
tivities.
Hopeful IL is that the family
doctor who is doctor of the
mind as well as the body should
be called in.
1t is great advance over the
treatment these youngsters
have been getting in the past.
QUESTIONS, ANSWERS
Student-Does st. Vitus dance
have any effect on the memory?
If so, does ii have this effect
after the patient has recovered?
AnSwer-St. Vitus dance
leaves no permanent trace of
any Of the higher mental func-
tions.
Like all infectious diseases,
mental processes may be OBJ
funded during the acute period.
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1942-10-21

you have another reader with
with the same name as mine
which In Way"
It's no stogie for me. lady. I
have Kay, May Fay and Gay
but no Way.
A S TO a man who met a girl
"A for the fist time and mar
ried her the same day we have
a very distinguished example.
It is Edwin c. Hill, the news
commentator.
The meeting and marriage
was a long time ago, but Mr..
and Mrs. Hill are still happily
married.
Writes a Madison, Wis, client.
ITO call natives OF Wisconsin
either Wisconsinians or Wiscon-
sites Ii ridiculous.
They should be called Badg-
ers."
"And natives of Massachusetts
should be called Bay Staters."
OUR pup has never been one to
" warm up quickly to strang-
ers. but now every time he sees
a soldier he walks up to him and
wags his tail.
don't want to credit the dog
with too much intelligence, so I
have figured out that as the
bellboys in the hotel we are at
have made SO much fuss over
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1942-10-21
On Broadway

RECENTLY Mr.. Stain OF
~ Moscow gave Banquet for
members of the Red Army Gen.
saral Staff and Communist Party
)aders.
- When Stain arrived after a
little delay. he took his seat on
the dais and. raising a glass of
vodka. said:
Comrades, i now give
toast. i give a toast to the
tho great Stain To the
wonderful Stain To Stain,
the leader of Russia's warriors
and I sincerely hope and trust
that Is the last will hear about
him at this affair.""
THE failure of the Nazis to in
L wade England in 1910 in
spired several quips about them.
One German woman was
brought into court, charged with
listening TO British broadcasts.
She alibied:
az had been told that the
fuehrer would talk from London
In October, and / didn't want to
miss that!''
In Amsterdam, about that
time. Nazi officer got on a
bus.
The conductor remarked sar-
castically:
What. Back no SOON"
MANY thousands Of German
Vl would-be commandos were
believed TO have drowned in that
abortive attempt.
So the Dutch spread the fable
about the baby shark that asked
its mama:
"What are we having for din
ner tonight"
Mama said:
Germans"
Baby groaned:
again
JOHANNA MARIA VINCENT,
the beloved Dutch thrush,
3 about TO begin concert in
amsterdam. when in walked
Seyss-Inquart. the Hitler-chosen
comnissar.
The spectators remained ST.
lent.
Some one on the platform
urged Miss Vincent 10 acknowl-
edge the Nazi puppets arrival
by saying:
"Your government IL here,
madam"
my government" she shouted.
els In London.
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1942-10-21

him he goes for any man he sees
in a uniform.
But then maybe he really
knows they are soldiers.
Anyway, IL makes great hit
with the soldiers because IL just
seems as if the pup is walking
up 10 them and saying:
"Hl, soldier! How are you
dom. Keep elm Hyin'."
Or something like that.
QUERIES from clients.
VI OH bet your mother was
a wonderful cook.
Any mother was a wonder
full woman and a good cook. But
she didn't like to cook and said
all that made ii bearable was
that she was doing it for love.
Q-Who was Athene?
Al haven't my encyclopedia
with me but I'll guess she was
the goddess who aided warriors.
THE Nazis are said to be very
l. proud of their espionage sys-
TEN which they consider the
worlds best.
However, IL is doubtful they
have spy who equals the
French spy in World War / who
went through the war as Gen.
eral Hindenburgs chauffeur.
So a popular-priced auto speed
regulator is to reach the market
soon.
Fine. I am going to get one
and fix II right at 35 miles an
hour.
It is good to know you are
keeping within the limit and IL Is
also good to have some way TO
prove II to q traffic officer who
might make a mistake.
A SKED what kind of food he
"A liked to eat most Jacques
lie Borgne, famous Manhattan
CneI, Sdlu.
"a ham sandwich"
A man after my own heart.
I am assuming, however, that
Monsieur lie Borgne meant a
plain ham sandwich with no
lettuce, no French dressing or
pickles and potato chips on the
side.
At the time the Nazis blitzed
London the only service which
carried on at the height of said
blitz was the taxicab service.
What I never have been able
to understand Is why Will Rog-
ers and o. o. Mcintyre never
won a Pulitzer prize. Maybe
they were too good-natured.
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1942-10-21
Henderson
Slips Up

which to grab a loosened por-
ton Of the tire.
Mighty hammers, and a va
rious assortment OF ODDS and
ends which. when spread out
alongside the road, always man
aged to creep into the grass and
get lost.
An established technique was
10 be followed in getting of a
tire. 1t was as set as how TO
swing a golf club or how 10 ride
a horse
The changer sat near the bot
tom or fiat part. Then he
grasped the upper part Of the
tire and started tugging.
1t was magnificent exercise.
better than all the patented
rowing devices. stretching ma
chimes, horizontal bars and the
like.
An hour was usually required
10 remove the tire. This was
just Step 2 in fixing a puncture,
with many steps 10 follow.
THE tube had 10 be repaired.
Il Equipment for this bit of
magic also came along with the
car and consisted of a miniature
coconut crater. some funny
smelling sticky stuff and a half
dozen or so little patches.
Long days of travelling to-
gether had made all these items
suspicious Of one another and
unwilling TO cooperate.
The little crater wouldn't
smooth the tube, the sticky stuff
wouldn't maintain its sickness
for more than a quarter of a
second.
Once the tube had been
grated. the sticky stuff applied
and the patch pasted over the
puncture, a period Of waiting
ensued.
No two motorists ever agreed
on how long it was necessary
for the patch to take"
Some said five minutes. but
extremists insisted on grasping
the patch firmly between their
hands and holding IL in the sun
for as long as an hour
II was amateur. and ineffi-
Gent, vulcanizing.
WITH the tube repaired, all
w that was left 10 do was 10
get the tire back on the rim and
pump IL up.
II getting the tire off was dew
.ilish, getting il back on was
HI with all the trimmings.
Either the rim was too big for
the tire or the tire too small for
the rim.
One or the other had to be
hammered into subsection.
The pumping process-with a
wheezy little pump that was
built for nothing more difficult
than initiating toy balloons
completed the exercise.
Speaking of pumping up tires
you know, the pictures of Mr..
Henderson indicate that his
chassis could stand a little OF
that sort OF work.
It's getting tough 10 tell
where Mr.. HenderSon's cigar
leaves of and Mr.. Henderson
begins.
Listen who's talking
Distributed BY heNaught Syndicate. Inc.
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1942-10-21
Wax4a~4 AxWM
WAR STAMPS
r r.

American Sailors and Coast
Guardsmen must face any kind Of
weather without ninching. In the
heaviest Of storms and the widest
Of gales they must carry on with
their appointed tasks. They've got
TO be tough and able TO take II but
their job Is made easier for them
by the sturdy Navy raincoats they
wear. Only $500 in War Savings
Stamps will equip a man Of the sea
with a raincoat to help him weather
any storm.
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1942-10-21

The school children Of the nation
have joined In the war on the Axis
through the Schools At War Pro-
gram. They are helping 10 sell War
Bonds and Stamps. salvage scrap,
aid Civilian Defense and other war
activities. Their contributions will
be recorded in school serapbooks
and exhibited throughout the eoun-
try. Every school participating in
the program will receive a GER
tiheste of service from the Treas
ury Department.
Y. S. T,sassyJ Dsbs,t-ssi
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1942-10-21
BY Il. v. Durling

Distributed by KING Features syud.. Inc,
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1942-10-21
Better Health
BY DIR. Logan CIendening-

7 HAVE always and continu-
i ously felt sorry for Adde'S
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1942-10-21

I seek for, one as fair and gay
But find none 10 remind me
How blest the hours passed oway
With the girl / left behind me.
Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1942-10-21
DEfR66 FINES

Published every Week Day Evening ard
sunday Morning by The Times Publishing
Company at i22b Times Square. Detroit,
Michigan.
The Nome nugget., 1942-03-06
Invaders Virtually Overrun Island

UNDATED, March (AP) - Java appeared doom- ed to conquest of Japans invasion hordes captured at least six key towns and medatey threatened both the old capital of Batavia and the Allied headquarters at Bandoeng They bombed the last possible harbor from which United Nations endorsements might debark.
 Starkly summarizing the crisis bulletin from the Dutch headquarters acknowledged that the enemy is advancing continually" and fierce battles are now raging all over the island The conmunique said that Rising Sun bombers are also attempting to knock out the port of Tlaap the Java south coast to prevent fighter reinforcement the escape of the islands de- lenders.
 Against grim backdrop of tragedy with Java an apparent sequel to Hongkong, Maaya, and Singapore, MacArthurs headquarters in the Philippines reported a heavy blow to JapanS armies of conquest MacAr- thur said thousand Jap troops believed drowned in the surprise raid earlier this week by his little air force, Subc Bay the north Bataan Peninsula fighting front where big troop laden transports bombed and sent to the bottom It is the first time that MacArthur has reported that American planes have met aerial opposition.
 A bulletin from the NET headquarters indicated that the Jap invaders are virtually over-running the 622- mile long island of Java, advancing in many sectors despite the heroic courageous resistance of Ameri can British Australian and Dutch soldiers.
The Nome nugget., 1942-03-06
Three Bombs
 Dropped On Honolulu

HONOLULU, Mar. 1 (AP) - The Army announced more than 12 hours later that the three explosions which aroused residents at Z am, Honolulu time, were from three medium sized bombs dropped by presumably an enemy air plane flying at a great height, launched possibly from a cruiser or carrier. There were no casualties and the only damage was broken windows, as the bombs landed in the out skirts of the city. This was the first air raid on Hawaii since December 7th.