Jackson advocate. [volume] (Jackson, Miss.) 1939-current, 1942-05-16
NATIVE !: son
By RICHARD WRIGHT

through the furnace mOaneO ana
the fire was white-h0t; there was
enough coal to last until he came
back.
He went to Forty-seventh Street
and stood on the corner TO wait for
car. Yes, Bessie was the one he
wanted to see now. Funny, he had
not thought. Of her much during
the last day and night. Too many
exciting things had been happen
ing. He had had no need to think
of her. But now he had to forget
and relax and he wanted to see
her. She was always home on SUM-
day afternoons. He wanted to see
her very badly; he felt that he
would be stronger to go through
tomorrow if he saw her.
The street car came and he got
on, thinking of how things had
gone that day. No. he did not
think they would suspect him of
anything. He was black. Again he
felt the roll of crisp bills in his
pocket: if things went wrong he
could always run away. He Won
dered how much money was in the
roll; ne had not even counted 1t.
He would see when he got to Bes-
sizes: No; he need not be afraid,
He felt the gun nesting close to
his skin. That gun could always
make folks stand away and think
twice before bothering him.
But of the whole business there
was one angle that bothered him;
he should have gotten more mon
ey out of it; he should have plann-
ed it. He had acted too hastily
and accidentally. Next time things
would be much different; he would
plan and arrange so that he would
have money enough to keep him a
long time. He looked out of the
car window and then round at the
white faces near him. He wanted
suddenly to stand up and shout,
telling them that he had killed a
rich white girl, a girl whose FAM
lily was known to all of them.
Yes, if he did that a look OF
startled horror would come over
their faces. But, no. He would not
do that, even though the satisfac-
| ton would be keen. He was SO
| greatly outnumbered that he would
be arrested, tried and executed. He
wanted the keen thrill of starting
them, but felt that the cost was
too great. He wished that he had
the power to say what he had done
without fear of being arrested; he
wished that he could be an idea
in their minds; that his black face
and the image of his Smotherine
Mary and cutting off her head ano
burning her could hover before
their eyes as terrible picture oil
reality which they could see anC
feel and yet not destroy.
| He was not satisfied with the
way things stood now; he was {
man who had come in sight of 6
goal then had won it, and in win.
ming 1t had seen just within hi
grasp another goal, higher, great
er. He had learned to shout anC
had shouted and no ear had heart
MIN; he had learned to walk an,
was walking but could not see thu
ground beneath his feet; he hat
long been yearning for weapons t,
hold in his hands and suddenl,
found that his hands held weapon
that were invisible.
The car stopped a block from
Bessie's home and he got off. Whel
he reached the building, in which
she lived, he looked up to the sec
ond floor and saw a light burnin,
in her window The street lamp
came on suddenly, lighting up tn
snoW-covered sidewalks with a vel
low sheen. 1t had gotten darl
early. The lamps were round haz
balls of light frozen into motion
lessnesS, anchored in space AM
kept from blowing away in the icv
wind by black steel posts. He wen
IN and rang the bell and, in an
sWer to a buzzer, mounted tn
stairs and found Bessie smiling a
him in her door.
Hello, strangerl"
Hi, Bessie"
He stood face to face with hel
then reached for her hands. Sh
SHE'D away.
What's the matter?"
l. lyon know what's tho 11oottaz. -