Evening star., 1942-07-06

This is the first age in which the
child has ever been considered a
problem. If it was healthy and
strong and we'll formed and we'll
favored and had a normal mind. the
parents congratulated themselves on
their good fortune. But If the child
was sickly and died, or If 1t was a
moron, the parents simply passed
the buck to Providence and Won
dered why they had been so mys-
teriously afflicted. They never as
sumed any blame for themselves or
felt that there was anything they
could do about it.
But this Is not the way with mod
ern parents. They feel that they
must move Heaven and earth to give
their children fair break in life,
and they make any sacrifice to do
so. All of us know poor fathers and
mothers who are working their
fingers to the bone and skimping on
food and going shabby in order to
have Tommy's adenoids out, or JIM
my's bowlegs corrected, or Mary's
teeth Strengthened, or little Jennie
sent to some school where experts
will fan the feeble flame of her in
tellect into light that will enable
her to stumble through life.
OF course, you may say that the
parents of the past could not have
done these things for their children
because it is only modern science
and surgery that have enabled us to
outwit nature and correct her mis-
takes, but our grandparents wouldn't
have wasted any money in any case
on merely beautifying their children.
They considered that looks were un-
important, and they ignored the i'm
portance of the effect that a pleas
ing appearance has on ones success
in life.
Those of us who are middle-aged
can bear testimony to our parents
casual attitude toward us. We were
looked upon as merely little animals
to be fed and kept clean and kissed
when we were good and spanked
when we were bad. Nobody made
any effort to understand us or to
find out If we had any especial apti-
tude or talent that should be de-
veloped. But now baby is psyche
analyzed from the time he is born,
and his parents study themselves
blue in the face trying to interpret
his howls and decide whether they
are a call for refreshments or have
some occult significance.
When a boy arrived at the time
when he had to choose his life work,
the old-fashioned parents could give
him no suggestions about what he
should do, because they were not
well enough acquainted with him to
know what he really wanted to do.
But the modern father and mother,
who have been pals with him and
played with him and encouraged
him to develop his individuality in
stead of trying to force theirs upon
him, are right there with the plan.
And it Is only to the parents who
have made friends with their chill
dren that the youngsters can go for
help and advice In times of trouble.
It is true there are few parents
now who enforce obedience on their
children in the old heavy parent
style. do as I say or I will turn
YOU out-of doors" But, after all, is
slavish obedience such virtue? Its
effect on the weak -willed is to kill
every particle of initiative in them
and to foredoom them to failure in
life when they haven't mother and
father to tell them. And even on
the strong -willed 1t could only be
enforced as long as the child was
physically afraid of its parents.
After that they had no hold upon
him.
So I think that the modern par
ents are an improvement upon the
old because it is only they who are
big enough and broad enough to
grant their children the right OF
self determination.