The Waterbury Democrat., 1942-04-14
Walter lNlncheII.
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 i, hear 60 little of John Nance Garner you'd think he was stlll vice presldentl
 Ouchl At LaCongA chlorine was chatting about . debs new wrap which was havina its pre- Fniere that night.
 I've seen that fllr-piece some place before," said the chorus gal n suppose lt was in front of some saucer Of milk" In Case You Didn't Know Being in the public eye Is like being Q clnder In it. so you must expect to be treated like one.
 Tee.Hee: Elsa Maxwell, the incest blilnp In town, approached @ Rain bow Room table group. Maestro Leo Reisman greeted her with: 'Where have you been all these weeksa"
 Helping the Govt design some new tanks" explained Elsa.
 "Really2" Hneowd Q deb. TT didn't know you'd taken up modelling"
 0f All Things! Louis Ni1er, the lawyer, gets hysterical every time he think of this sill y. A worm was crawling along Inlnding his own business when he encountered Q worm staIiding Up. The crawl- ing one got closer and started get- ting gay.
 "Hello. honey" said the worm to the one standing up, I'm nuts for you - whaddaya say about us gettin' married, huhP"
 "Oh," said the other, "dont be 0 dope, I'm your rear endl" Xn Fewer Words: Observed near tho Lido Beach Club: Drive Slowly. You May Be Tired of Life. But What About the Life of Your TiresP"
 Forecast for I9A2: From Jay Franklins colyum in Richmond, Va: walter Wincheu will cease to write about Cafe Society be- cause 1t won't exist. Walter Lippmann will write the best columns of his life and nobody will read them. Mark Sullivan will be drafted into Government service to help administer the nationwide food-stamp plan. Dor othy Thompson will fight 1t out with Clare Boothe Luce for the role of Julia Ward Howe or Florence Night ingale. David Lawrence will con- tinue to do his stuff so long as he can find paper to print 1t, after which he will join the USO and work in Q canteen. Raymond Clap- per will gain in courage and, break ing with Roy Howard, will emerge as c real columnist. Westbrook Pegler will join the Army"
 But don't bet on 1t.
 Morning Mall: Dear Walter: So chorus girls never become famous just notorious, eh? The Winchell you sayl Howx about Ruby Keeler, Barbara Stanwyck, Virginia Bruce, Gladys Glad, Ina Claire and Joan Crawford? Go stand in Q corner, but don't get me wrong. I'm Q for- mer HellEapoppin' chlorine, and I have good reason to be nuts about W. W.--Margie Young, Banjo Eyes" ]"
 Could Be! Larry Kent, the Beachcomber clown, was asked ::
 "Nh-nh," nh-nd-d Kent, "some- body once sat on my hat" 
 Broadway Story: Her name is Miriam LaVelle, 6 dancer. Been try ing to crash The Big Apple for years. Appeared in musicals des- tined for New York, but they with. cred en route. Last month Miriam joined frv Caesars show, My Dear Children" Out-of-town critics liked her lots. An opening was set for B'way. But the show collapsed in Philly.
 Last week Miriam finally hit Broadway and the Big Burg-as a figure in lights on the wilson ani- mated electricksi But wait for the punch linel .. Booking agents enjoyed her silhouette so much they looked her up and booked Miriam for the Strand, where she opened April 10th.
 Jimmy Walker @yB: "The Free dom of the Press Is too often con- fused with the freedom of the pub- lisher."
 There arc many examples of clever headline-writing. We think this is one of the best: When John MaSefield arrived here from Eng. land where he was poet laureate, he refused to grant newspapermen an interview So one evening paper ran this streamer: Kings Canary Refuses to Chirp" which made a better story than the interview could have been.
 Add B'way Dictionary: Show Off: Fellow seen out with his wife Out-of- of-towners: Those who pay to see a Broadway play ard like it .. Frame.up: When the truth leaks out Cheap Skate: Guy who thinks he's entitled to get back any dough he loaned a friend {, Success: When you can wipe your feet on the guy who helped you stand on them.
 From the editorial page of the N. Y. Post: eff Adolph Hitler captured Our Town, which are the first ten New Workers he would hang? Certain names will spriJg to your mind at once. Dorothy Thompson? Walter Winchell?"
 Ladies first, of course.