The Waterbury Democrat., 1942-02-03

!
Edison almost any cock
tail party such raucus diatripe a.
Who's a parasite, you parasite" o
Smile, buddy, when you call m
parasite"
Today you can actually feel PEG
pie all over Washington preparing
their own private lists of Parasite
Who Should Leave Town TIL
trouble is that if all these nominal
ing lists we're placed end to ent
they would make up the city direc
tory or the District of Columbi;
census of 1912.
This naming Public Parasite Mum
Der One-and on up as high as vol
care to counts not game tina
must be played in Washington
alone. Other sections of the coun.
try have their ideas on who are thu
real parasites of Washington. Tint
season for such hunting now hay.
ing been declared open, you, too, car
join in the fun. Tally-ho and theme
song for this sport is that torch bal.
lad of a few seasons back, Get Ou
of Town"
The President himself, in starting
this little birthday party pastime
dropped the handkerchief behind
only two classes Of people-a. Those
who live in 20-room houses on Mass.
achusettS Avenue. b. Those who
just as in the last war, have come
to Washington simply to have q
good time.
The Mass. Ave. address is OF
course a generic term. 1t could Just
as well apply to Connecticut avenue
or any OF the sWanky northwest adj
dresses, including 1903 r street
where on the night Of the Presi-
dents birthday, Washington's high
priestess of society, Mrs. Evalyr
Walsh Hope Diamond) Mclean
was holding hov sewarming in hel
new place which even the uppitiest
of Washington's society columnists
has dubbed " a kind of Union Sta
ton" Forty carpenters and inter-
ior decorators had worked on the
place for week getting it ready
The upper crust OF Washington s
diplomatic, official and parasite So
ciety was there. Would the President
have put the finger on this merry
din, where the guests had met and
the feast was set to celebrate his
own birthday?
tn President ducked when he was
questioned about whether the re-
lief people CT the District would
have to go with the parasites. He
changed the subject and called at
tention to the fact that there was
actually a shortage of blind people
in Washington. This came as quite a
shock to his listeners until it was
made clear that the President meant
the blind people who can't see, and
who are employed in running the
refreshment stands in many govern
ment office buildings.
The President was, however, lead
ing with his chin and on his birth
day, too. For his list OF parasites
still leaves unclassified a large num-
Der OF specimens, politically and en-
tomologically speaking.
For instance: All those congress
men who voted just recently in ia
vor of granting themselves a gov
eminent pension.
All the congreSsmen's relatives
and patronage leeches who have
been fastened and fattened on the
public payroll.
The vast assortment of red tape
specialists who clutter up most of the
old line government agencies and
are useful chiefly in referring call
ers and communications to some
other department.
The successors to the gold brick
officers who in the last war wore
spurs to keep their feet from slip
ping off their desks. Stacks and
pink pants" that don't match the
officers tunics being the style in
this war, there aren't so many spurs.
But the number OF men with uncer-
tain status and duties cluttering up
the War and Navy Departments and
all their annexes and temporary
buildings is really disgrace to the
trops of the line( sea and air COM
mandS.
The 4O0-its probably thousand
now, but anyWay-all the assorted
lobbyists, fixers, lawyers, ex-con-
gressmen, ex-NeW Dealers, ex-ad-
and assorted stuffed
shirts who are trying to use their
past Or mag. nary influence with the
government in pleading for special
privilege. All of them should 60 out
on the first fiat car.
Labor politicians, dollar a-year
men who put self-interest and corp
grafton above country, scions OF
wealth in cash jobs to dodge the
draft, debutantes, press agents, job
hunters, publicity seekers. glad
handlers, hotel managers who charge
so cents for a bowl of soup, IS cents
for a piece of pie and two bits for
a cup of coffee. night spot maestros
who put on a 50 cover charge and
expect a S. tip, gouging landlords
who Dust an old tenant to get more
rent from a newcomer, shrew land
ladies who park government stenog-
raphers four to a bedroom and six
teen to a bath, price lacking keep
ers of shoppes, profiteering cliff
dwellers,' the people live in WASH
ington and snake their livings at the
expense of the government workers,
the PARASITES on the DarasiteS-run