Worcester Democrat and the ledger-enterprise. (Pocomoke City, Md.) 1921-1953, 1942-08-07
"Chirps'' ~
from the
Democrats Pen
from the


fact often gets me into trouble. l
have to do a tall piece of lying occa-
sionally to get from under.
Now. this story about these two
snakes-you may have heard that one
about a single snake, reported to have
brought death and destruction upon
the race of mankind; but this is about
two snakes, and the man who told 1t,
Gained for himself the title of cham
pion liar.
One of these snakes was, evidently
on short food rations, and seemed TO
he possessed of cannibaistic propen-
sites. 1t gave chase to the second
REPTILE. caught up with it, grabbed Its
tail and began a swallowing act.
This seemed to give the intended
victim new idea. He decided to
show his enemy he liked snake meat
too. He suddenly made leap IN the
air, formed a hoop out of himself
bent back. and caught his attacker by
the tail, and began, also, the swallow
ing act. And, blest if, in short time,
both snakes didn't disappear.
Now, l don't vouch for the truth OF
this. l mention it only because / came
very near to disappearing entirely last
week, not down somebody's gullet;
but. if the hot weather had gotten
much hotter, l would simply have
turned into a grease spot, and disap-
reared off the face of the earth.
1 think 1 can appreciate that joke,
with which the dignified and stately
Baltimore Sun" graced its columns,
not long ago. 1t told of a good cltl-
zen who died and, against his better
Judgment, he was quartered in an
abode of the dead commonly known
as hell.
He hadn't been there very long be-
fore, so the story gies, he wrote home
for his overcoat, telling his folks 1t
was so much colder there than he had
experienced in the upper regions of
this good old earth, he felt the change
so keenly he decided he might take
pneumonia or something by reason of
the different temperature.
1t was not further related as to
whether the garment was forwarded
or not; nor whether, by reason OF
these troublous times, it reach its
destination. 1t did not state as to
whether transportation by navigation
across the StyX was endangered by
submarines or mines. 1t is to be
hoped the poor man was not left to
suffer. and also that since that time,
the temperature of his external abode
has not changed to such degree as
TO make his home life, to say the
least, uncomfortably warm.
1t is said that when tourists 10
Florida strike cold, wet, dismal, sea
sons, the native sons are fond of tell
ing that such are entirely abnormal;
it had been years since climatic con-
ditions were so conducive to discom-
fort. So, imagine, His Satanic Ma
jesty apologized for the air-condition-
ed rooms in his subterranean boarding
house. By this time, natural fires
may have brought about normal heat,
and the poor man may be writing
home for Stacks or shorts, or, it may
be emulating the costumes of early
Eden. There's no tellin'.
You know, speaking of not remem-
bering every letter, syllable, word, or
paragraph that make their appear
ance in this column, want it distinct
" understood that have very high
regard for the truth, and what l say
in this column can be entirely relied
representatives.
Now, l had very estimable lady
to ask me last week if l were really
stopped by road cop on recent trip
down in "Old Virginny." I'd like to
know what put it in my head if 1
wasn't. l really forget, just for the
moment, what was the cops name,
and / forget just the spot | was at
when the siren screamed; and l for
get just what was the verbatim con-
versation between US. But, if you
don't think l was stopped, you take
your Rolls Royce down on those nice
Blame roads and, for the sake of the
exhilaration, go ahead and see just
how many MPH she is capable of
swinging, and see if my story wasn't
all right,
How-Some-ever, l will "feSS up" to
few embellishments, once in a
while, Real facts are not always
available, so l substitute something
'iust as good" as the merchant will
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