Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1942-06-05
California
Weather
Is PuzzIer
Florida Man Sheds His
Second Sweater
BY DAMON RUNYON

Al 6OS <hi6NAtS 81 W "htat
a Dade County, Fla, fellow
could 60 around the town with
only one sweater on under his
smock and you should have heard
the plants of the natives. They
said ii was hot. The thermom-
eter was up to only about 80,
and they said IL was hot!
The gentlemen natives res
moved their coats and lossened
their Wristbands. The beautiful
lady natives appeared in the
sheerest of garments. The native
dogs painted furiously, though
Satin, the cagy Dade County
cocker spaniel, still stuck along
side the radiator unwilling to
take a chance.
You would have thought from
the comments of the natives
that a spell of tropical climate
was afoot. which brings me 10
curious phase of Southern
California nature. They are
quick 10 claim il is hot. but they
will never admit that il Is cold,
an idiosyncrasy that had me de-
ceived for some time. IL had me
thinking my blood was thinning
out to a dangerous degree.
On days this spring when the
sun would be shining, the flowers
blooming and the little brides
singing in the trees, I would
seem to feel a certain sharpness
in the ozone that called for
heavy overcoat. but on disclosing
myself to the natives thus
caparisoned. I would be greeted
with oerisive remarks. When
said IL was cold. they said / was
daffy. They said it was just
balmy.
WHILE / generally found cor
w roboration of my sensibil-
tiles in the thermometer, the
weight of public opinion was so
heavily against me that / finally
had to doubt the accuracy of the
mercury. especially when I OBJ
served the light array in which
Sid Grammar. a chronic native,
went about.
Mr.. Grammar weighs no more
than 102 pounds with a knack-
wurSt in either hand and by
the looks of him has about as
much vitality as a little white
butterfly. Yet in weather that
had me shivering and shaking
under a thick flogger. Mr.. Grau-
man would be bouncing blithely
along the streets of Los Angeles
in only a lightweight suit, sans
weskit.
l noticed that he had a habit
OF hugging buildings as he
Travelled and / thought, trium-
phantly, that this was some con-
cesSion to the chill, until /
learned that in his youth lady
dropped a flower pot on Mr..
Grammar from window In San
Francisco and that he has since
tried TO avoid such hazards.
I HAVE heard another theory
Il clusion that If a person as
frail as Mr.. Grammar did not
feel any GOODNESS. 1 must be
wrong in ever thinking il cool
out here. Then one night Mr..
Grammar fell in a faint as
result of being blitzed three
times hand-running in a gin
rummy game. and in assisting
in his resuscitation / discovered
what seems TO have been COM
mon knowledge in Los Angeles,
that under his. outer shirt he
wore seven wooden undershirts.
He peeled just like an arti-
choke. Later. he admitted 10
me, somewhat shamefacedly.
that he was prompted to this
fraud partly by his innate loyalty
to Southern California weather
and partly because Of a deal with
the Chamber of Commerce that
has him pointed out to strangers,
who may be thinking the weather
cold, as a living refutation OF
the idea.
7 HAVE heard another theory
Il that 1 hesitate mentioning.
have heard that Mr.. Grammar
used to have a pal who would
bet suckers that Mr.. G.. was
wearing seven wooden under
shirts, a proposition seemingly
so preposterous as to invite
heavy speculation among the
unsuspecting.
understand there was
bust-up when Mr.. Grammar
absent-mindedly left off one UNI
dershirt one night and cost the
partnership its bank roll. his
pal claiming he was tossed.
MeSsrs. Walter Winchell. AL
Jolson and Prof. Ben Bernie,
also of Dade County, Fla.
thought they were back home
the day of the slight rising Of
the temperature and hurled
themselves into a swimming pool
in Beverly Hills.
Before they could come up
from the initial dive. the surface
of the water was slightly con-
gealed. The weather is subject
to quick change here, even If it
never gets cold.
Copyright. ist2. by King Features