Evening star., 1942-11-17
Every One Longs
For Some Bit
OF Privacy
That Is the Reason
Prying Mothers
Make Mistake
By Dorothy Dis

By Dorothy Dis
Dear Miss Dix: I am Is years old
and have been keeping . diary.
About 4 month ago my mother went
into my bedroom, broke the lock and
read it. I was very upset about it,
although there was nothing in it
that I would be ashamed for any
body to see, but I just couldn't be-
lieve my mother would do such .
thing.
Ihave stopped keeping q diary, al
though I enjoyed doing 1t very much,
because I know it would never be
mine personally. I have been re-
ceiving mail-nothing in the letters
important-but I treasured them.
Yesterday I found out that my
mother had gone through all my let
ters and read them, for she has been
questioning me about every little
silly thing In them, snd I am red
eyed crying over it, because I know
now that the only way can keep
my personal things safe Is to hide
them.
II my mother would ask me, I
would show her my letters after I
have read them, but I want the
pleasure of opening them first. But
what burns me up is for her to
sneak behind my back and spy on
me. What can do about 1t?
DAUGHTER.
Answer-Nothing, am afraid, be-
cause mothers have curious con-
ceit that makes them always think
that mother knows best and that she
has a right to pry into every corner
of her children's minds and hearts,
as well as their bureau drawers.
It is terrible mistake that q
mother makes when she does this,
because it forever shuts her out
from the child's confidence. It turns
mother from a best friend into a
snooper, and it raises a barrier be-
tween mother and child that she can
never break down. And so I should
advise this mother, before it is too
late, to apologize to her little daugh-
ter and tell her that she didn't
realize what she was doing when she
searched her belongings, and that
she will never do it again.
One of the things that we are all
too prone to forget is that the fun
damental longing of every human
soul is for some degree Of privacy.
We want one secret chamber into
which no one ever enters unless we
ourselves open the door and invite
them in. We never forgive those
who do not respect this, but who
crash our locks and force themselves
upon our innermost thoughts and
desires, and so despoil our holy of
holies.
And children, no less than grown
ups, have this same longing for pri-
vacy. 1t is something instructive, as
you may see if you will watch even
a group of tiny tots whispering to-
gether over some secret, though it
may be nothing more than that they
are going to have gingerbread for
supper.
There is something that ministers
to our dignity, that recognizes our
right as an individual, in having our
letters given to us with their seals
intact. Not one of us but who re-
sents having our mail opened and
read and come to us second -hand.
We may be perfectly willing to read
it aloud from the housetops after
we have read it ourselves, but we de-
mand that little gesture of inde-
pendence, we crave that little thrill
of expectancy that we lose if an
other hand has opened the envelope,
If other eyes have read its contents
before we get it. And dull, indeed,
must be the parents who do not
realize that half the pleasure their
children get in receiving letter is
in opening it.
And how can any mother ever