Evening star., 1942-07-11


erly seated in their various legis-
lative chairs, the citizens will get
more action than five-legged
squirrel on a treadmill.
"War or no war" ne maintained
today at his listening post near
Keep Off the Grass" sign. close to
the Capitol, "the boys aren't step
ping on any more toes than they
have to until the votes are in.
Once the ballots are counted, they'll
start swinging with their Sunday
punches and not mind whom they
hit"
This surprised me. I had always
liked to picture Washington as
just one great big, happy family.
with Republicans feeling perfectly
free to borrow piped waistcoats and
campaign pledges from Democrats
and vice versa, and a place where
lobbyists. labor leaders, dollar-a-
year men. political bosses and all
others worked together In sweet
harmony for the public good.
Speaking out OF the corner OF
his mouth tnecessitated by his
always having at least one ear to
the ground) my informant said that
the town was filled with blocs OF
all sorts, and that many of the blocs
seemed to care more about what
happens to them than what hap
pens to Hitler.
The chicken bloc, representing
the Rhode Island, Buff Orpington
and Dominecker interests, wants
higher price for the feathers used
in stufing army pillows, and is will
ing to fight to the last rooster for 1t.
The cat-belling bloc admits that
metal is needed for munitions. but
demands that some Of the scrap be
diverted into making bells for cats
says our bird life is threatened.
The vest bloc Is boiling because
two-piece suits are compulsory: the
Swiss cheese bloc wants more
holes; the egg bloc wants the right
to use cross-eyed Gamblers; and this
bloc and that bloc want something
else
All OF these blocs control votes,
my man says, and before elections
have to be handled with the care of
poison Ivy bouquets and right now
they are being handled so tenderly
that the war effort Is suffering.
"A lot Of them will get it in the
neck after November, though he
says.
Without posing as an authority
on politics, it seems to me that the
thing to do is to advance the cleo
tions--move them up to the last
week in July or the first week in
August. Get them out of the way
so the country can get down to
brass tacks (copyright) in winning
the war.
The voters are undoubtedly ready
to vote right now. Nothing vital
Is to be accomplished by waiting
until November. Any legislator
worth his franking privilege, any
candidate worthy of a babys kiss,
must have assembled his pledges by
now, must have hammered his plat
form together, and marshaled his
excuses. Also, he must have already
practiced his speaking gestures until
they are letter perfect. and worked
on his tone and diction until he
has down pat that old phonus-
belonus below that is part and par
eel Of the campaign orator.
So what's the use OF waiting?
Turn the boys loose now. Look at
the oratory that would be saved.
1t has been said by more than one
knowing man that one fault of our
Government is that the successful
candidates go into Office so worn
out from talking that they are USE
less until they have had three or
four months of rest and have been
put on diet of throat lozenges.
Too, a sweet, short, quick campaign
would save an endless amount Of
gasoline. rubber and rail and air
transportation.
distributed by McNausht synicate, Incl