Detroit evening times. (Detroit, Mich) 1921-1958, 1942-07-19
Brighter Side
By Damon RunyOn
MIR. Joe Turp Writes from
BROOKLYN

DEAR SIR last night my wife Ethel ses joe
7 want TO tell you something before you near IL
from somebody else Old MsSus Pope ses she is
going to have me arrested and put In JAIL one
ses tried TO murder her husband.
SES well Honey Bunny did youP Ether ses
don,t ioke about 1t Joe because its very serious.
she is telling everybody in the neighborhood that
am fuse a criminal. I seS has she gone crazy
ali OF a sudden or whatP
ETHEL SEES no I don't think she mas gone
crazy but she is terribly mad at me and oio
Mister Pope is fit TO be tied. He Is In peo anu
nv pop ses he hears he lays there and uses tne
most awful language all day long and Is very un-
complimentary to me whenever he mentions my
name and that he mentions it quite often 700.
II was all over the rubber collection Joe
I SEES no now am commencing to smell
something ses baby please don't tell me you
have got yourself in more trouble ABOUT tnat
rubber business after all the grief had squaring
Brannigans beef when you clipped him Tor MS
garden hose? Ethel ses Joe told you all along
not IN nav any attention to Bill Brannigan be-
cause that old hose was full OF holes
SEES maybe it was sweets but you had no
right to take 1t without asking Brannlgan. Etnel
ses he wasn't home at the time Joe and when
somebody is collecting rubber Tor the government
they can't wait around all day to ask somebody
for little piece OF old garden nose iul OF NOES
Besides Branngan never used that hose for any
thing except TO squirt water on his dog in hot
weather. He hasn't had blade OF grass In that
teeny little yard OF his in years
I SEES we'll II cost me two bucks and plenty
OF argument Just the same and now suppose
something else Of the kind is coming up with the
Popes l ses did you take something made Of
rubber from them TOO without askingP Ethel
SEES no asked ] asked Missus Pope for anything
OF rubber she might have around the house and
she ses she didn't have anything but was in
her bathroom Joe and there was one OF those
rubber mats there that people put in their bath
tubs when they are taking bath to keep them
selves from slipping and sliding
so I asked Missus Pope for her rubber mat
and she seS she couldn't spare il because her hus-
band liked It and YOU know that was most I'M
patriotic attitude joe So the next day when
saw her down town l went 10 her house and told
Maggie the girl that works for the Popes that
Missus Pope ses she Wa 10 give me the rubber
mat and Maggie did and sent II TO the govern
ment.
SES well you shouldn't have done that Ethel.
ses you let your enthusiasm get the best of you
but guess l can square the Popes with the price
Of the mat and Ethel says don't think so Joe
You see the next morning when he got out Of
bed old mister Pope hoped into the bath tub
and his feet flew out from under him because
the mat was not there and he came down hard
and sprained his back. That is why Missus Pope
claims tried 70 murder him. But Of course that's
foolish Joe. I ses OF course II IS baby and don't
you worry any more because old Joe will get you
Strengthened out somehow.
sES speaking Of sprained backs that re-
minds me that have got a crick In my own from
lifting a weight today and think I'll lie down
awhile with the hot water bag under me and
Ethel ses you can't do that Joe I sent the hot
water bag to the government too.
Yours truly, JOE TURP.
copyrrht 1912, EinE Features s,ndi.s's Iue.
Distribuied b. international NsNs Service