Evening star., 1941-08-14

new ways to tax us. Frankly. the
strain is telling on them Faced
with the task of getting the last
possible nickel out Of us in taxes.
they have just about exhausted
their ideas
I don't mean to alarm you but II
we don't volunteer to help them
we run the risk Of winding up the
year with some money that we can
call our own. And this would be
a slap In the face to the men we
have chosen to run the Ship Of
State. They have set their hearts
on getting it all through taxation,
and it would be pretty small of us
to sit idly by and let them fail.
~ ~
Up until the last few days they
have done a mighty fine job. They
have remembered TO tax even such
things as prizehghter ear protectors,
vaulting poles, curling stones, and
microscope lenses. 1t seems now,
though, as if they were slowing up
a bit. They admit they are few
billion dollars short of their goal
and give strong indication Of need
ing help if they are to get that last
dime from you and me.
So let's all put our shoulders to
Morgenthau's wheel and see to it
that we don't have to take second
place in taxation to any country in
the world.
Haven't we always had the tallest
buildings, the prettiest women, the
biggest cities, the biggest resources,
and the biggest everything else? Are
we now going to fall down? Do
you mean to tell me that we aren't
now going to get together and see
to it that we have the biggest taxa
ton in the world?
Let's show the other countries
that where their taxation ends,
ours just begins.
Think of the things that haven't
been taxed in this countryI Why
it's a shame.
Just sitting here at the type
writer I can list you dozen taxable
items that will be of help to the
tired. harassed legislators.
Take the bells that people put
| around cats necks to warn birds.
There isn't penny of revenue COM
ing from those bells. l looked 1t
up and cat bells nave been over
looked completely. suggest
straight-away 81 bell. Right there
you'll raise another 81 l,000,000 to give
away to Russia.
Table manners are another thing
that has been ignored as a taxable
item. AS long as people insist on
having table manners, make them
pay for it. Spooning your soup the
approved way is symbol Of
gracious living, and who has any
right to get by with gracious living
for nothing in this day and time?
Think of all the potted geranium
plants in this country that have
never been taxed. Is there any
reason why man who likes flow
ers shouldn't have to pay dearly
for this curious streak in his make
up? What is a country coming to
when it allows flower lovers to 90
around tax free?
What about a tax on fun? The
legislators can't miss scoring with
tax on this. Unfortunately.
Americans are fun-loving people,
who will smile and laugh and sing
even when faced by an emergency
so grave that silk stockings. white
wall tires, and aluminium cocktail
shakers are taken from them. If we
insist on having a good time when
our nelghbors just an ltty-bitty way
across the ocean are in trouble,
make us pay for it. Tax us 81 an
hour for fairly good time, 81 an
hour for really good time, and SO
an hour for one of those evenings
that is so much fun that we forget
all about taxation.
There is only one danger in all
of us citizens coming to the help Of
the boys who need new ideas for
taxes. With our suggestions added
to theirs We might very well get the
taxes up to a clean 100 per cent.
And I wouldn't like to see the look
on their faces when they realized
that, even though they had every
bit of the money, 1t still wasn't
enough.
Happy March Is, pals.
Distributed bS McNausht syndicats. Incl