Evening star., 1941-12-24
Woman
Never
Host
Term Only Correct
When Using Plural
Form for Couple
Br Emily Post

Dear Mrs. Post: Will you please
give us your opinion Of calling a
hostess q host? For example,
Mrs. John Blank was host TO her
bridge club" and so forth. What
do you think Of junior as a sufflx
for a daughter whose name Is the
same as her mothers?
Answer-A man and his wife may
be spoken OF together as hosts"
but to say Mrs. John Blank was host
at the bridge club" is impossible.
Mary Smith, jr, is just about as
improper as Mary Smith, esquire.
However the laws are not much con-
cerned with names. In many if not
in all States I am told one can call
oneself anything one pleases so long
as it is not done with intent to de-
fraud. For all I know a girl may
have a visiting card engraved Miss
Mary Smith. jr. Miss Mary Smith
the younger is lexicographically
correct. I think Mary Smith I'd is
perhaps the best whenever this is
made necessry by the fact that both
are painters or actresses, and the
difference is not made plain by The
Suffix Miss or Mrs. In non-profes-
sional cases the mother is Mrs.
John, not Miss Mary.
Dear Mrs. Post: Would 1t be per-
missible to have girl ushers at
wedding? Why must ushers always
be men? Wouldn't there be a good
reason for having girls when the
bridegroom is coming from a great
distance and knows no men here?
He can't ask his best friends to 60
to the expense of travelling so far,
and he can't afford to invite them
all as his guests!
Answer-It is always proper
and not at all unusual-when the
bridegroom own home is at a great
/ distance that the men in the bridal
party be chosen from among the
friends and relatives of the bride
1t is strict rule of good taste that
men and not girls, shall be ushers
at weddings. At theatrical per-
formances, or wherever audiences
are perfunctorily shown to theil
places, girls are not unsuitable
But at a wedding. remember, the
etiquette for the ushers is definitely
prescribed Each behaves as though
he were a host: each offers hi;
right arm to every woman guest he
escorts. and also makes, a polite
amount of conversation as they
walk up the isle. When he has
shown her to her pew. he takes
leave with a slight bow. The ushers
at a wedding do not trot on ahead
holding flashlights, and programs
as In theater.
Dear Mrs. Post: I've seen a young
man constantly, but for only about
four months. Until lately I had
never met his parents nor any OF
his relatives because the former
were always away and the latter
do not live in town. This young
mans grandfather-his mothers
father-passed away lately, here
and during the last days of his
illness many relatives came to town
and I met most of them. I also
saw his parents several times dur
ing those days. Then the grand
father died
I didn't know what to do at the
time about sending flowers either
to the funeral or to my friends
mother (the grandmother is dead
and not having time to write you
and get an answer, just let it go
Was I terribly wrong I'm not send
ing flowers at such time?
Answer-Ordinarily I should say
not knowing the grandfather al
all and having only just met hi,
mother, that sending flowers tt
the funeral was not at all neces-
sary. I don't mean by this to sug.
gest that it would not have beer
proper to send flowers nor thai
his family would not have appre'
ciated them. But I think that i
would be very nice to send a few
flowers to his mother herself, now