The Ely miner. [volume] (Ely, Minn.) 1895-1986, 1941-02-06

is to David and not to you. It is
Punch'S immortal advice to the
young man about to marry.
Don't" You are going into this
partnership determined to destroy
David's bigness and confidence and
originality by long process of flea
bites; you care already for the opin-
ion and judgment of your friends
more than you care for him. Your
attitude is not loyal, protective, con-
ident; you are not looking beyond
these school-teaching days in a
small town to the days when he,
with all his crudeness and frankness
and tactlessness will be moved on to
better position. No, you've deter
mined to make polished courtier
out Of him, husband who does
everything Maude wants him to do,
lackey dancing about with chairs
and opening car doors and never
forgetting to remove his hat.
It's unfortunate that David didn't
have mother during his small boy
hood, to train him In gentler man.
ners. The example of a wife may
indeed change him miraculously
but only if that wife makes him feel
that he is the one object of her
solicitude In the matter. Not to i'm
press her friends, not to save her
embarrassment" not to spare her
old-maidy nerves, but because she
loves him, because she is close to
him In everything, and she likes to
receive from him the little atten-
tons that all women prize.
To take the attitude of a teacher,
to guide, will destroy her marriage
sooner or later, for David is obvi-
ously the bigger-natured person of
the two, and to have swarm of
gnats, in the shape of gentle re-
proaches, sweet reminders, sensitive
tears and hurt suggestions buzzing
around his head from morning until
night will speedily disillusion him.
True Spirit of Wifehood.
In one of Dickens stories there is
an incident of a country farmer and
his lass, who come to the bureau
for a wedding license. The man
cannot write and so makes his
mark; the girl makes her own mark
beside his. Later some friend re-
proaches her, reminding her that she
was well educated and can of course
sign her name. Eyes, know" says
the wife-to-be, shut the dear good
fellow hasn't had any schooling-Pm
to help him get started, and didn't
want to shame him!"
That is the spirit of wifehood.
Wifehood has to be oneness or it
isn't anything at all. To be watch
ing a man nervously, exchanging
disturbed smiles with your friends,
trying to shush off your husbands
references to the fact that Mama
is in money difficulties or that frank
furters occasionally disagree with
certain stomachs may satisfy your
little inch-wide sense of propriety,
but it isn't marriage, and the woman
who feels that it is viii be much hap
pier unwed.
Ninety-Seven Per Cent All Right.
II you go into it at all go into it
confidently and gloriously, willing to
put UP with 8 per cent of imperfec-
tons for the sake of that 81 per cent
of solid hneness and character and
achievement.
Some years ago a bride that I
knew asked four old friends in for
tea. They didn't know her husband
very WELL they were surprised to
find that "tea" was actually tea
and not cocktails and that he didn't
smoke, didn't like many of the things
they liked, and had distinctly Swed-
ish accent.
When he left the group they be-
gan with laughing comment upon
him; comment that rapidly degen-
Grated into mockery, and finally was
open imitation and more or less
overt pity for Anna. She listened
quietly to their prattle.
When they left, Anna said that
she would go with them to the door.
'tAnd I don't want any one OF you, !"
she said quietly In farewell, lever
to enter it again." The shocked and
surprised guests could not find a
word to say, and as matter OF fact
when the door closed, it was closed
to them forever.