Evening star., 1941-03-09
For judith, there seemed noahing ahead except
dsspsi1, bui n W. strange things may happen
~ xesIie CcsJlon Baxn.xd

often and how they must manage somehow to
see each other again.
He had picked some flowers for her and
fastened them on her dress and then it
just happened.
For a moment - oh, really, when you
looked back, such a very brief moment -
they were in each others arms.
Then they sat solemnly gazing into each
others eyes, incredulous of such happiness,
and she had seen in his eyes reverence and
a tenderness she had never once seen in
Rates - something young and innocent and
lovely as the day itself.
That was when Rates voice had broken in,
bruising their ecstacy as his heel bruised the
moss on which they sat, shattering their
happiness by saying, in cold, awful voice,
things y things that weren't true at all.
limiting at things hidden, shameful.
Il guess you'd better CO. Rafe said, and
Jerry had tried to read her face - scarlet
with shame for Rafe and what he was saying
- and had gone away leaving her alone with
Rafe.
"IIl take you home" Rale said. and
walked beside her, making her feel guilty,
until they reached the house and she ran
sobbing in to her mother, protest breaking
in an agony from her. Il hate Rafe," she
cried. Il hate him! He made me feel as if |
was - was Ziah Merrimole.
Don't mention that woman's name here,
said her mother.
AND Rafe. coming in, added his word: mo,
| won't have it!'' as if already he owned her
body and soul and had right to order her
conduct Going to the stove to get warm
water to battle her eyes, she was grateful to
her mother. Don't be hard on her. Rafe.
She's very young and she's not had expert
ence of life much" Then Rafe came over and
took her arm, but she pulled away angrily
and the pot spilled. She hadn't meant to
scald him, and she ran to get olive oil which
once had been used on her for a burn, but
her mother said, Better leave it to me, I'll
tend him. What you'd better do now is
go get the mail for him. It's close on time
to CO."
She saw then - with a sudden terrible
clarity - how it would be with the three of
them: her mother the peacemaker, while
she lived, and herself growing older and re-
signed like some married people did, taking
things as they came. and only, maybe, on
some day bright with summer when the moss
was green on the bank and the trees whispered
above the place she would remember
She welcomed the fog now. because it felt
cool on her face, and because it shut out
everything but alternate moments of ecstacy,
when swift bright wings of memory sustained
her and she could pray for a miracle to inter
vene, and moments of despair when all the
moist earth wept at her young grief.
Get along there, Blackie, she urged,
for the horse had slowed and showed signs
of stopping. She f1icked the reins. Letting
them drop again, her hand touched something
- forgotten, withered flowers that Jerry had
pinned on her dress. Dropping - as if Rates
words had blasted them too. The two faces
rose before her: Jerry laughing, looking in her
eyes the way he had; and Rafe, whose look
and words had stained even her memory of
him, who had put laundering fingers on the
loveliest thing she had ever known. 1t was
unendurable.
"Blackie!" she cried Come up there,
Blackie!'
With a squeak of leather Blackie's head