Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1941-06-13

and adopt the old japanese means
of transportation.
1t isn't at all clear to me why we
are faced with a gasoline shortage
while the Japanese can go on honk-
ing and footing all over Toxic on
American anti-knock and high test.
Why should we be deprived of Sum-
day picnics while Japanese families
load up the old bus with japanese,
of all things, and bang off to Full
yama for the day?
Maybe there is some deep Stats
Department strategy behind the
shipping of precious fuel to an Axis
partner. Can it be that the Japs
are such bad drivers that to turn
them loose with plenty OF gas on
that little island will result in their
committing a sort Of highway hari-
kari?
If the rickshaw. or, more properly,
the jinrikisha, comes to this country,
every man will have 10 serve as his
own motor at first. Not realizing
that it was so much more difficult to
| transport oil across this country
than it is to get it to Japan. we have
neglected the development Of expert
enced rickshaw pullers.
Washington should be a fine
sight of a Sunday afternoon!
Down Pennsylvania avenue, be-
tween the shafts of trim rickshaw,
will come Harold Ickes, pulling Mrs.
Ickes to the White House for a call.
"Giddyap!" Mrs. Ickes will call
as Hugo Black brushes by. pulling
one Of the lightweight New Deal
boys.
There will be hurrahing and bet
ting among the young bloods as
Harry Hopkins. Summer Wells and
Senator George race around the
Capitol, taking a group Of South
American diplomats on q sight
seeing tour.
Occasionally there will be a cry of
dismay when some American states
man is run over by Japanese En-
bassy official, tooling around in his
automobile.
Later, as Japan gets more used to
automobiles and we grow more sc-
customed to rickshaws, professional
pullers will come into use in this
Country. Athletes will turn natural
ly to the new business, just as they
now turn to pro football. baseball.
tennis, golf, and tndorsing anything
that isn't positively harmful.
x**
Everything will go all right for a
while, and then the c. I. o. will
move in and organize the rickshaw
pullers. Then, before you know 1t,
they'll be striking for lighter rick
shaws, lighter passengers, felt-lned
shafts, the right to tell the passenger
where he wants to go, two and a
half times overtime for trips exceed
ing one block, and fiat feet pensions.
Finally, a national sitdown strike
of rickshaw pullers will occur.
1t will paralyze the Nation.
Just when the situation appears
completely hopeless statesman. a
man of the hour, will arise with a
solution.
In an address to Congress, which
will live through the ages as a
masterpiece of clear thinking, he
will save his country by pointing
out the one thing left to do.
Buy back from Japan all the gaso-
line and oil we need TO get our en-.
gines running again.
He will point out that Japan, due
to its proximity to the great oil wells
in Texas. California and Pennsyl-
vania, naturally can outstrip us in
the storing of OIL And that no
matter what the price, we must buy
great quantities of fuel from this
nation which has so much Of 1t.
"You cannot ignore the impor-
lance of trading with a nation that
is so beautifully blessed with no ma
tural resources" the statesman will
use for clincher.
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