Browning chief. [volume] (Browning, Mont.) 1941-1953, 1941-10-03
Problems
With the Children
Issued b. IL NatSsaal KlnA1Var-
ten A0octAt3oa. 3 West toeA d,
New Yssk C11y
Do You AntagOnize
Your Children
BY EMMA GARY WALLACE

Parents sometimes are distressed to
discover that there seems to be a
natural antagonism between one or the
other Of them and one OF their chill
dren. We are so accustomed to the
acceptance of the idea that children
should always be subservient to their
parents-obedient and docile-that it
is sure to give the older members OF
the family a jolt when they find that
quite the opposite condition exists. In
order to avoid such an unpleasant sit
uation. it will be wise to find out what
usually causes such antagonists.
Whenever this condition has developed,
unless We locate the root Of the mat
ter. We shall not be able to apply the
right remedy.
First of all, parents themselves need
TO live together tremendously This
requires that they be considerable in
their association and in their treat
ment OF each other. If differences are
allowed to become irritating, and there
is pickering. fault-finding and criti-
ciSm, the child will naturally take the
part of one or the other. or else de-
yelop a prejudice or antasonism to-
ward both. It cannot be otherwise.
Donald loves his mother. When he
sees his daddy do something or hears
him say something which causes
mother to be annoyed and perhaps
awakens a quick retort from her, or
brings the tears to her eyes, Donald
will be sure to feel antagonistic toward
his father.
In the same way, Mary's mother may
be obviously careless Of the comfort
and likes and dislikes of Mary's faith
er. In this case, the daughter is more
than likely to develop an antagonism
toward her mother.
Second. many parents awaken an
tagonism by over-much nagging and
fault-finding. Inevitably some Of this
nagging is unfair and does more harm
than it can possibly do good. Both
parents should avoid mistakes of this
kind They are difficult to correct
Third. SelfishneSS and lack of un-
Outstanding on the part of some par
ents causes antagonists. Albert has
girls as well as boys among his friends
now, as it is natural that he should
at his age. But his mother always
finds a great deal Of fault with every
one of these girls, instead Of accepting
such casual young friendships as of
no great importance. To appear to
take them too seriously Is apt to an
tagonize a boy, and the mother who
does this will very likely find herself
shut out from the inner circle Of her
sons life.
This lack OF sympathetic considera-
ton should be guarded against, just as
much. when the child Is daughter
It is selfish for parents to make
too heavy demand upon the time and
companionship of either a son or
daughter and to feel that such sacri-
flee is their due.
Fourth, parents antagonize their
children when they are reluctant to
give credit for ingenuity or native re-
sourcefulness or initiative on the part
of son or daughter There is no need
to make children vain or egotistical
by too much praise, but at least the
parents should be ready to say, That's
an excellent idea! Try it," or. You
worked that out very well indeed
Irene!" Give credit where credit is
due.
Make an effort frequently to get
your children's viewpoints, SO that you
may see yourself as they must see you
Remember they are alert and keen
of mind