davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1941-11-18
Coast Issue
Settled Soon
Grudge Bottles on
Nov. IS Are Answer

SAN FRANCISCO - orsro
STATE and Stanford led the Pa
eifie Coast conference football
scramble today. eut ther- wss -
clear fsvorits 70 am N, iati
round-and-round robin for the
western Rose bowl bid.
Washington State college.
.eourre 81 howl-mlnded teams.
did ~ again SATURDAY In
dumping Stanford. 1918. n
aas the fourth time this year
the Cougars have knocked
off top-rsnking team. vet
the ruined their own season
with three early losses.
Oregon State took a routine so
vin from California to gain q
slight edge in the Rose bowl pic
ture. since the Beavers have
beaten both Stanford and Wash
ington. the other main contenders.
The Issue will be AZ stake Nov 20
In two traditional grudre bat
ties: stanford-cslifornia and Ore
Eon stste-oreTon.
IDAHO LOSES
Montana spanked Idaho. $50.
in the annual game between the
conference poor relations" to de-
eide the cellar. u. c. L. A. beat
the Camp HAN soldiers 200.
and u. 8. c. were Idle
and Oregon rested from its Armis-
tice day win over Santa Clara.
Santa Clara won Its annual
grudge game with ST. Mary's.
ISIS, Portland university up
set Gonzaga, $40. and Loyoia
heat Creighton, ST.. In sun
day Kames.
Washington and Oregon. both
struggling TO stay in the confer
enee top bracket. meet in this
weeks feature game. Oregon State
will breathe" against Montana.
L. c. L. A. meets Santa Clara and
w 4. c. plays Gonzafs. stan
ford and California rest for their
big game" 81. Mays gose east
TO play Fordham and u. 3. C.
journeys to South Bend for Notre
Dame.
Other Saturday scores included:
Cal. Aggies IL. Nevsds IL ftiel. |
rs. Pomona Ii. Fort
Ord 81. Cal Rsmblers O: Puget |
Sound 6. College of Idaho o; East
,rn Oregon Fl, Whitman o: East
prn Washington o. st. Martins o |
ltie): Redlands 0. Whittier o
ttie): Western Washington 10.
Washington I; WSc Frosh
8, Washington Frosh o.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1941-11-18
Broncs Beat
Gaels, IS TO Is

san FRAScIsCo-Tht Santa
Car. university football team dls-
played q superior running attack
and too much oxfsF ard
thumpeo ST. Mays college IS 10
Il before 10000 persons IN their
annual little hig game here yes
terdsy.
The passing II ken csssnsks
and Ward Helser II the Broncos
wss matched BY that II Presto
rodssto ~ Modesto. TIRE star Gatl
sophomore. but the ssnfs clsrsns
turned on the steam in ths second
period and we're never headed.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1941-11-18
Lewis Soldier
Elevens Good
Travellers Duzzle
Seottle Grid Fons

The Arkansas Travellers. lths
2osth Anti-Aircrsft regiment,
romped through the Fort Casey
eleven BY s. 10 0 score yes
t.rdsy AZ Seattle Civic field.
Tne Travellers are mostly former
students Of Arkansas Tech Who
joined the army in = group.
The Travellers displayed rszzle-
dazzle offensive with Aubrey
Bob Fowler the big star.
The i46th Field Artillery
defeated Fort Lawton 10 in
the other half Of a double
header in the Puget Sound
Army Football league.
In another Sunday game. the
West Seattle Athletic club. un-
defeated leader of the Northwest
Independent league. defeated The
1o5rd Anti-Tsnk regiment. $40.
sesfH A. A FORT lA>Ei
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1941-11-18
Northwest Conference Title
Will Be Decided Turkey Day
Willamette and Whitman, Both Without
Defect. to Settle the le4l Argument

Willamette- Whitman gam. Thurs
day. st Martins at Pacific the
same day. Portland at Pacific
Lutheran Friday night. and Col
lege Of Idaho against jefferson
Barracks in ST. Louis. Mo, Friday.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1941-11-18

Gonzaga High
Catholic KINGS

sPOEs>y-GonzaEa high school
defeated OsDes q Seattle is-T yes
t.rdzy to win the states mythical
Catholic high school football cham
pionship. Both teams scored n the
first period and Gonzsgs tailed
again IN the fourth.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1941-11-18

The Northwest conference foot
ball championship vill be decided
Thanksgiving day in game be-
tween Willamette and Whitman.
and the past week-end's events
established Willamette as a solid
favorite.
Both teams are undefeated in
conference play.
With me Washington Inter
collegiate conference title al
ready slowed away for the
third consecutive year nv the
Pacific Lutheran college. the
Nines season ended with an
snfi-ciiman In the mud ut
Cheney Saturday night ~hsa
Eastern Washington College
of Education and st. Martins
played tn n seoreless tie.
A few hours earlier. Western
Washington defeatsd Central
Washington H. in q homecoming
game at Bellingham. The victory
elinched third place for the Wild
cats. behind the Lutes and Eastern
Washington.
Pacific Lutheran scored its 18th
straight win Friday night, defeat
ing Linfield 1916 al Tacoma IN q
non-conference game
LoGGERs WIN
In the Northwest conference,
College of Puget Sound beat Col
legs Of Idaho go al Tacoma Sat
urdsy. with Ralph Lundevall re-
covering a fumhled lateral behind
the Idaho goal line in the first
period.
Portland university smeared
GonzAgs university SO In the
Norfh~est's bsr game yester-
day In Portland. Scoring In
every period and gaining an
overwhelming advantage in
statistics. Portland avenged q
string of losses that started
with the first Portland Con
zaEa game eight years ago.
wash inEton and Washington
State freshmen furnished Seattles
gridiron fare Saturday. with the
Cougar kittens winning SO
Games this week include the
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1941-11-18
City Basket
Play Toniqht

The second bracket Of games on
tho City Basketball lesru. sched-
uls will be played tonight at Ln-
coin courts.
Starting ., o'clock with Gas
mens nndefsstsd high scorers
meet the Aslented Shipvsrd club.
Tire . o'clock title " between
Chairmen and Lakewood, With
the former club also undefeated.
The 0 o'caock ssghtcap 10 BE-
tween +lst Division An-Stars and
the Autos. both indicated.
Almost every member Of the
Gasmen lineup scored at least
five points last Thursday night in
swapping Lakewood. They estsb-
lished themselves as one Of the
teams TO beat in the race.
ship,ards has n potent seer-
ing attack that could ~
Troublesome. They must win
the game TO get hack into the
title race.
chairmen s1ould experience no
difficulty in getting past Lake.
wood. They have height and ex-
perience.
This will be the start for the
tist Division. They have a good
club that could upset the Autos.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1941-11-18
Cards-Texas
Hit on Chin
Bowl Bound Hopes
Now Only Memory

>FM YORK - That unauthor-
lied Rose bowl bid stanford :
Indians extended II Texas two
weeks ago was Just an emharrass-
ing memory for both parties today
with only five unbesten teams
surviving a generally formful foot
ball weekend which all but settled
five conference championships.
While Texas A. 4 NJ. Min
nesota and Missouri assured
themselves of not less than
ties In the southwest, Big 10
and Big Six races and Duke
and Oregon State closed In for
the kill in the Southern and
Pacific conferences. all the
Indians and Texas could show
were the reverse ends of up
sets and very red faces.
Stanford bowed 10 Washington
State. 1918. dropped into a triple
tie in its league snd-unless Ore
gon defeats Oregon State Nov. %
lost all chance for the sectional
crown and Pasadena invitation.
Texas blew its bowl opportunities
and the Southwest crown by los
ing to Texas Christian. 14-7.
The Longhorns. now defeated
and tied. no longer can salvage
the Southwest title because Texas
A. & NJ. all but wrapped 1t up
with 1875 conquest of rice which
kept the Aggies in the thinning
ranks of the unbeaten along with
Minnesota. Duke. Notre Dame and
Duquesne.
GOPHERS ROLL ON
Minnesota rolled towards its
second perfect record season and
Big 10 crown by crushing Iowa.
The Golden Gophers need only get
past Wisconsin now to make their
triumph official At present, both
Michigan and Ohio State-which
meet next week-hold a chance
for tie should Wisconsin defeat
Minnesota.
The picture il the same in
the Big Six where Missouri
hlsnked Oklahoma, $50. and
has only weak Kansas ahead.
This rsce. however, 10 all but
over because Missouri can
only be lied by the sooners,
whom the IiEers have de-
feated.
In the Southern conference
Duke thumped North Carolina,
200, and has only North Caro-
lima ahead although the Blue
Devils are nominally tied in the
league race with William & Mary
whom they don't meet this sea-
son.
The two unbsaten independents
kept pace with the leaders. Notre
Dame. headed for its first unde-
feated season since 1880. filed a
bid for the mythical national
championship by defeating North
western, rs, but will not consider
q howl nd. A team that will. Du.
ouesns. finished 4 perfect season
by toi.inr previously unbee ten
Mississippi State. $50.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1941-11-18
Sports Parade
y, HARRY FERGUSON

TX Stf1-tioffss
Player Of the Neek-specisl
Delivery Jones. Pittsburghs
great back. who. In two games,
has hlossomed into q distinct
sIl-Amerlesn possibility.
A week ago he helped
about the upset OF Fordhsm.
On Saturday NJ broke the hearts
II the Sehrask, rooters AZ Lin-
coin. With only As seconds left
and the score tied At ~. the
Nehrasksns Eel. sure they had
q tie.
Suddenly Jon.s intercepted =
pass and ran IS yards for the
winning touchdown. The miracle
Of ~ h that he almost did IL
again In the dying seconds Of
the game.
He intercepted another Ne
brasks pass. ian through 10
players and finally was halted
by the 18th man. three yards
short of a touchdown. In short.
the postmsn almost rang twice
In IS seconds.
Upset Of the Week - Texas
Christians Il 10 Z victory over
Texas. II WAS the same old
story. set to familiar music.
Texas. looking ahead tn a tough
game with Texas A. A NJ. let
the TCU boys slip UP on them.
There wasn't any fiuke about
IL. either. TCU Won both the
game and the statistics. Com
parative figures: First downs
TCU I, Tesa. 5: yards gained
rushing-TCU it7. Texas 1le:
yards gained passing-TCU 50.
Texas -.
The moral TO the story of
Washington ststes surprising
IA to Is victory over Stanford
is that you can't win unless you
have the ball reason q
amount of time. II also seems
To BE- about the only snswer 10
teams that are adept In the T
formation. Washington State
won because II kept Stanford
on the defensive.
The same thing happened IN
the Chicago Bears. another T
formation team. when they took
. sheilscking from the Green
Ray packers. Once you let the
Bears or Stanford have the ball
they viii roll and roll.
You've got 70 get the jump
on those babies and keep the
pressure on EN- for so full min
utes. incidentally. II now looks
like that one-point loss is going
to be the margin that keeps
Stanford out Of the Rose Bowl
OREGON State has the inside
track.
After what harpened last
year. Cornell wasn't taking any
chances on "a jrday. You will
recall that c.s-nell beat Dart
mouth on Saturday last season
and then lost 10 them on . week
dav when the officials got
around to checking up.
Seems Cornell had heen given
. NTH down on one series ef
plays and had scored the win
ming touchdown. making the
score ! to &
Later. Referee Red Friesell
confessed he hsc made mis-
take and Dartmouth was award
ed the victory. ) 10 0. At Ithaca.
y. Y. on Saturday. Cornell took
out some insurance by running
up 80 points While Dartmouth
Was collecting 10
It's about time people quit
treating that Duquesne team as
. step-child. Year after year the
boys out in Pittsburgh come up
with a good club thar doesn't
get its share Of publicity and
glory.
This week the Dukes rot
around 20 convincing the eonn-
try thai they really had class
when they sslloped. n tough
Mississippi State team. Is to o.
II WAS Duquesne's eighth
straight victory and closed out
the season. 80 the Dukes ARE .
sure bet for = Bowl bid.
Recommended for saturday
Vanderbilt vs. Alabama AZ Nash
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1941-11-18
On We lam
VIA llllorY MErcAu

Football 10 slowly but surely making s 1871 va. the
And right behind it broad grin and great height
basketball which has written Of the amazing
chapters in al sports history.
Fifty yean Old basketball today 10 witnessed BY more
And more individuals play il than any other sport
Tour cd nslshbor gam.
among the dsy would bring
s'.r. insulting I'm or bias. q ga s'.v.s s o,v
Dss 70. ssar As.r toaa,
ass shoulder baseball boring hockey football
.s~tss sshsr major ,psrs Yen want 70 nssa'''a
indeed national ps'tins big shot in the r'es.on. And
An q I'M. from beginning ago
49, Massachusetts,
Al game played found personal
recreation.
Gradually popularity advanced the INCA playing major role
Today LOO colleges make saskssssn major sport
ns' ss.e ash .fssss .s s preparatory '''''' '''
rnss are sswn ssana professional
moon. for .xamp whscky bask.,sa today
that larger halls
Iocomo's Greotssf Year
And this expect TO see the greatest year
nat wouN have been true even the defense program
and military establishments ousrs had not become
Our thr,, etv hish schools Lincoln
staged shs the last few years have made
ceuss. Of Puget their
hands a sending interest upward
Commercaal circuit
Ii, playground Department done likewise
d hsvs the districts all directions
twenty-five Years Ago..
Go hack q years ago In Tacoma. You Of that
en- who sees ahead You picture what basketball will Be
quarter AZ q century hence.
You saw 70 within Is
hssksban than other Ameri
sport
That IL win arouse recognized
IN many abis critics national sport
That stand Its among the major sports Of the
-,aa ;. only pay lie way. sss VIII become
healsAy prsft-n akse for colleges anL"
money scbbled turn Your lis
cdds And you would havs won
fortuna
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1941-11-18

=. II AWaNI-uIWNss FONlCT :.
Buck 2. FTtsr ?. Keeton Pack. trv-
ior-points. Turner 2 Fowler 2 Keetpn.
Substitutes 2o6th-Sheffleld joan
son. Williamson. Ressly. Dsnrseh-r-e
Mckinney. Jet. Logan. Frier. nact.
speck. Crawford. Tirdai Fort Casev
-Liestrom. Busch Shell. ruAda.
Edes. Fletcher.
Officials Referee. Len Jo.nson.
umpire Joe Pasiia. head ilnesman.
Max Stzrcevich
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1941-11-18
Adams Star Of
Trap Shooters

Capt. Martin Adams starred in
the ie-yard event At the Tacoma
Gun club shoot Sunday with Is
out Of so. George Snyder knocked
off 81 To take second place. Earl
Colson was third. IS.
Or. 8. L. Blair won the skeet
with So out of so. c. Z. johnson
was second with IS and DR.. @. Z.
Griffith next with rs.
Eighteen turkeys had their
heads on the block.
The next shoot is November 30.
"A IG-Aard Tarrels
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1941-11-18
GRID RESULTS

By United Pre~a
santa Clara IS, st. Msry's Is.
Loyola 81. Creighton !.
Niagara !. Scranton :.
Providence 20. Lakalle !.
st. Vincent IL. st. Bonayenture I
ST. Norbert Is. Loras 3.
Portland 81. GonIaga o.
siilanoya !. Detroit 6.
Aavier !. Wiley 6.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1941-11-18
1461H ALSO WINS

Ross Warnock. former Yakima
Valley all-star high school back.
guided 146th Field Artillery to
10 victory over Fort Lawton n
the opening game of the double
header at Seattle Civic field.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1941-11-18

TILE CREEK - Rodney
Rudolph Battle Greek high school
tackle. tips the scales at go
pounds. HIS IS years old.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1941-11-18

Your postmaster can tel voa
how to invest IN L. S. Defense
Bonds
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1941-11-18

TINY Thorrhi read the flash from Pale Alto Saturday
evening heard the aerial squawkers tell the story
Ana then Tiny, once the hero Of stanford when he
coached winning and Rose Bowl teams. evidently said to
Tastsn Clark. shaushn.ssy don't
anybody else you DO you're dead goose
Ana rAornhm would be saying mou.hiui indeed
csass s ana Ras Bowl bds bids
u vAn d aarA days came y coaches
sahea IL eAsppns mock HIS hsad pced ssupes
Taskssi.s haircut Colby Gesssr u.asanA H.
shaughneay learned to suffer
suffered He has learned 10 take the worst
TOUCHES. jobs the nation He
dssruned ALL They knew his Chicago
Nd a .u .s .sss a.na, u @
made the 1910 football world He made
wny h. put polish Model and mad.
~ world admire Il He became stanford dd
nataoa Adopted the Model II became
Es 1910 machine . darling No foo'ns about that
Critics Mode II Tough.
His Is4 naehine mighty fine club. Make no homes
Anyway critics up and down the Coast the
looked the 1s4e before began and the teto
sh:ss.ss.y Said he soadns miss -, ,.. .,, .a,,
spark model They said They hcossd
So whas- Wen off
it, fcued and its tires rather Debated Rather
ssxy field Oregon State played under identical
caarr. p,cs-s up
.
II Attch-
shaushnessy said:
goTy those Cougars have been rolling
Stanford
. great probably rolling the
today
II Cougars Beuf Agqies. What? -.
where Oregon State given the inside track for the
1912 Rec Bowl game
yes lock at the standings. that might be al right.
Oregon State did dump Stanford
But look At the records you VIII SO where washington
only Oregon State which beat STAN
defeated Stanford.
going figure the Rose Bowl
puzzle this Year,
that's BY Cougar, the Giant Killers and
rolling club this writing But the Con
knock off Texas Min Tacoma stadium Dec what then
brother. Puhlic opinion would take hand
And Bsbe Hoilnghery their fine coach
largely That city players
capahae something
- su1sst u IT, w lost to fa inferior use and UC
Au-Ameraca Billy seveu
Herb Godfrey Londoe Gene Rod
ohke Bill Boyle They a gave
uDunsd brilliant
And Babe and get Of kids We
hays good looking Kids coming up
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1941-11-18
DEVILS BARGAIN

40 gaugt-
@.--Turkey winners.
.
A DEVILS BARGAIN
A bargain with the devil and
how a great salesman tires TO
change its outcome. makes the
basis Of RkO Radios unique
screen offering. "Ail That Money
Can Buy" Edward Arnold. Walter
Huston. James Craig and Anne
Shirley head the featured cast.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1941-11-18
TIGERS RETAIN NUCLEUS
DnT I-NgnYA NJ A. F....x

than Is Of the IS victorious
Missouri Tigers Of this season are
in line 70 Dc hack next year.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1941-11-18

Your postmaster can tell you
hou 10 invest IN L. q. Defense
Bonds
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1941-11-18
Coast Leaders
sIAABLE START

I'd - IolcndoN1i "a - Fed sea-.
after touchdown.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1941-11-18

Scoring: l4sth
Touchdown Ross
point, sieffermar
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1941-11-18
SU N R Use

tuesday. Nov. Is . -
The Ely miner. [volume] (Ely, Minn.) 1895-1986, 1941-08-28
BATTLE OF WORDS
(Ben syndicate-wNU service.)

Var flames rage in many
European countries and their
heat cause emotional blood
pressures of Americans and
others, to rise Uhen they try to
discuss fault, effect and so on.
Miss Norris cautions iUomen in
particular, to talk less and lis
ten more. To remember that no
amount Of argument can change
the others UietU, no more than
their ot1n. She ,Uarns that d.
Uided opinions bet,oeen families
and friends, tUlten expressed too
often and iUith too much certain
ty causes trouble that could cas-
lily be avoided ,Uith little re-
straint, to the great benefit of all.
Var touches all homes and all
peoples, and she advises prayer
and tUork as the antidote ,Uith a
great measure of silence, ,Uhen a
discussion grO,Us too toarm. She
unites all the peoples of the
World under a common banner
t0hen she ,orites, AL tUant peace
and security, security from hun
ger, enforced idLeness, social in
justices and security from sUar,
that is peace.
The Ely miner. [volume] (Ely, Minn.) 1895-1986, 1941-08-28

pie, want only these two good things.
Peace and security. Security from
hunger, enforced idleness, social in
justice, and the security from war
that is peace.
Work Instead of Talk.
There is great hope, there is a
glimpse of Gods eventual triumph
in the fact that we are all genuinely
and fundamentally in harmony on
these points. And since that is so,
will you not join that small but in
creasing group of women who
DON'T TALK?
They work. They help with food
and clothes and knitting and money.
And they pray, which is the realest
help of all. But they've stopped
talking. They've lifted themselves
into zone of higher vision, trying to
see the world of tomorrow, and find
ing it a better world. A world in
which, whoever wins-and no nation
ever really wins war!-there will
be fairer life for everyone; un-
employment done away with for
ever, slums cleaned and changed,
and the earth and the air and the
seas dedicated only to the services
of peace.
We will live to see that world.
Dictators dead; nations gradually
regaining their old boundaries and
their old entities; and victors and
victims alike awakened to realize
that no good ever came of wars,
that there are fair and honest ways
of settling international differences
without war.
Wisdom in Being Silent.
We can actually hurry that day by
Withdrawing from violent and ex-
cited speech now. And as any talk
of public affairs is apt to grow vio-
lent and excited, the real wisdom
lies in retreating into a dignifed,
friendly silence. Listening, nodding
perhaps, permitting oneself a some
what dubious expression perhaps,
but not entering into the word bat
ties which are only an echo of the
real battles overseas.
Try this plan anyway. Be the girl
in the office, or the woman at the
club meeting, who listens. Even if
you know all the answers, refrain
from giving them. While you are
listening, lift your heart to God. If
you can't think of any longer pray
er, repeat in your soul the words of
the one prayer given us by the
Prince of Peace himself. "Thy king
dom come, Thy will be DONE" For
peacemakers are called the children
of God.
The Ely miner. [volume] (Ely, Minn.) 1895-1986, 1941-08-28
, ASK Me -
!, ANOTHER I
A General Quiz
The Questions
A General Quiz

l. In navy slang, what is known
as an lash cam?
2. Which of the following is not
both in Europe and Asia-Russia,
Turkey and Iran?
8. Which, Plato, Aristotle or
Socrates first expounded his
philosophy?
4. Where is the original Bridge
of Signs?
5. The projectile called shrap-
mel is named after a general who
served in what country's army?
6. What are Kiushiu, Shikoku
and Riukiu?
z. What is Polaris?
8. Who was secretary of state
in George Washington's first cab
met?
9. How much of Greenland S
total area (736, 518 square miles)
is ice-free land?
10. Where is the worlds largest
organ?
The Ely miner. [volume] (Ely, Minn.) 1895-1986, 1941-08-28
Prolific Insects

Every season the white ant or
termite proudly produces a million
baby termites to swell the world S
ant population. Toads and frogs
both have large families, the for
mer in the neighborhood of 5000
at time, and the latter half that
number.
Snakes are three to four times
as prolific as rabbits, for whereas
the latter rarely produce more
than dozen baby rabbits at a
birth, snake often produces 40.
The king of the jungle, Lord
Lion, is usually the proud father
of quads, and his hereditary
enemy, the tiger, can boast of the
same number.
The Ely miner. [volume] (Ely, Minn.) 1895-1986, 1941-08-28
Wasn't Asking for Trouble
That Early in the Morning

Two travellers had just met.
One was doing most of the talking.
eyes" he said, ST arrived home
one morning after midnight and,
as I opened the door, I saw a
stranger kissing my wife. I
closed the door softly and hur-
ried downstairs. At l a. m.
came back. 1 opened the door
softly-and there was the strang-
er, still kissing my wife. So I
went downstairs again. At 1:15-"
"Just minute interrupted the
other man. ''Why did you keep
galloping downstairs? Why didn' t
you walk right into the room?"
"What?" cried the laxative
man. "And have my wife catch
me coming home at that hour?"