Evening star., 1941-10-01
Obese Child
Finds Self
Amusing
Often Laughed at
By the Friends
Who Love Him
By Emily Post

BY Emily Post
Perhaps it is my own magma
ton, but having noted many times
the extraordinary popularity of the
occasional fat child, I have been
wondering lately whether the pop
ularity of such a child is not a
special reward for a special course
of discipline, by means of which he
has learned to take every hurtful
thing that happens to him as
funny!
When thin child falls down and
cries because he is hurt, his play
mates give him sympathy. But
when Fatty" falls down and bumps
his head. the other children scream
with laughter. Fatty" therefore,
learns in time to seem funny to
himself and soon acquires a stoical
philosophy that enables him to join
good-temperedly in laughter-even
at himself. Perhaps he appreciates
at least he seems to-that no
friend-making asset is greater than
the ability to see the funny side of
his own miSadventures!
This is a deeply sincere answer
to a mother who criticiZes the bad
manners of her neighbor's children
for laughing at her little boy be-
cause he is fat. I'd like to under
score one line in her letter-"And
yet they seem to love him dearly"
That's just it! And to hold their
love for him it is very necessary
to avoid letting him think that you
could ever believe other children
are Intentionally cruel or even rude!
Encourage his own belief that
laughter is fun and that he is right
to laugh with them!
Dear Mrs. Post: My two sons
one II and the other just 7-have
been visiting their father for the
last two weeks. When they get
home shall I have them write
thank-you notes to their fathers
wife? Also, 1 would appreciate
having you tell me what they should
say in the event that you think
they ought to write such notes.
Answer-Certainly they should
write thank-you notes. The same
sort of notes they would write to
an aunt or any other relation with
whom they have been staying. After
all, their stepmother is very near
relation. They should write and
thank her for a good time she gave
them and whatever is pleasant that
they can say. I hope you won't mind
my adding that under all such cir
cumstances it is most important to
avoid having the children made
conscious of any strain that can be
avoided. BY this mean that both
parents should make an effort to
take the situation as naturally as
possible and show neither disap-
proval nor curiosity.
Dear Mrs. Post: Please tell me
If it is correct to tell our new maid
to use the back door? She came to
the front door to see me when en-
gagged her, and something tells me
she expects to continue to use the
front door. I think this entrance
should be reserved for the family
and their friends. II I am right,
will you please tell me how to tell
her this without hurting her feel
ings. I don't mean to do that, only
I think both of us should have GER
tain privileges.
Answer: No one who is in domes-
tic employ excepting a child's nurse,
and only then when accompanying
the child, uses the front door. This
Is a definite rule of propriety and
every well-trained and properly
minded employe is expected to un-
derstand this. Because she came in
the front door to be interviewed by
you, does not mean she expects to
continue to come in the front door
when she is able to let herself in
with her own latch key for the back
door. As a matter of fact, opening
her own door with her own key will
be the only way she will be able
to enter the house, unless you live
in neighborly country town, where
both doors remain unlocked always.
So many requests have been
made for copies of my article on
details concerned with training
camps behavior of visitors and
presents for the mem, that have
had it printed as a leaflet and will
be very glad to send 1t to any one
who sends me a self addressed,
Scent stamped envelope in care
of this paper. Leaflets cannot be
mailed unless self address en-
velope bears correct amount Of
postage.