Worcester Democrat and the ledger-enterprise. (Pocomoke City, Md.) 1921-1953, 1941-05-02
"Chirps'' @
from the
Democrats Pen

Well, Sir, you people have heard
about the guy who decided he had
"kivvered" too much territory. Find
ing himself in a room crowded with
men whom he was not as we'll ac-
uuainted with as he thought he was;
also, being popped up with some ar
tificial courage, he could not resist the
temptation to send out this challenge:
81 can lick anybody in this room!"
No one felt displeased to argue the
question with him, so this hesitancy
on their part gave him additional gall.
He shouted out:
81 can lick anybody in this town."
Still he found no takers, and after
this he was full of swagger. But he
didn't notice that, before he issued
his third def, the audience had been
augmented by q gentleman from Tex
rs. And when our hero bawled out
his third roar:
81 can lick anybody in this STATED"
this same Texan edged closer and,
with well-judged distance and disre-
garding all standard rules of pugi-
ism, led with his right and landed
square on the button. When the guy
woke up two days later, he blinked
and stammered:
%Blest if I didn't 'kivver' too much
territory"
Now, maybe some of you remem-
Der told in this column, week or
so ago, about man who was desir-
GUS of subscribing for the best paper
in the county. After mature delib-
Grafton, he came in and laid his
money on the cashiers desk in the
Worcester Democrat" office, told us
what he had been thinking and what
he had decided to do.
You know how I told you I almost
fell over with the odor of that floral
bouquet; and, for while, I wonder
ed whether / heard him Alright, and
had to. pinch myself to see if / were
awake or dreaming. Not that we
are unaware of the truth of what he
said, but because the poor old editor
more frequently gets himself sock
in the jaw rather than pat on the
back. If he should happen to spell
one word wrong, no one sees the hun
dreds he's spelled right. If he gets
heading misplaced, that's the only
heading seen. If he happens to call
him jim when his name is Sam, why
Sam is ready to fight. And so it
goes. Then when a man comes in,
subscribes to your paper, and says
it's the best in the county, why you
just can't help but feel the millennium
of journalism has arrived-for you at
least.
Now, then; here comes another
man into the office, latter part of
last week. He asks to look at copy
of the Democrat. He is handed
one, he seats himself, and begins to
look upon that sheet. After consum-
ing enough time to know what it con-
tanned and then some, he said:
+ "I am from the Western Shore of
Maryland. have travelled the
length and breadth of the Eastern
Shore and I suppose I have now reach
ed the jumping-off place. / want to
subscribe to an Eastern Shore paper,
and, naturally, want to subscribe to
the one think is the best. That's
why I am taking careful view of
this one."
He continued his examination for
q while longer, asked to retain the
copy, picked up his hat, and walked
out. He had not gone for enough
to leave the pavement leading to our
office, when he returned and said:
cts no use looking any further.
"The Democrat" is the best looking
paper I've seen on the Shore, and I've
seen more than one. Here's one dol
lar and half, and my address is
we'll, it's on the Western Shore, os
that's all that's necessary"
Well, Sir, first the county; then the
Shore That's certainly "kivvering"
some territory. If had chill the
first time, I was thrown into a fever
by the second. Pm now waiting for
some body to come in representing
the State, and I'll be knocked clean
out of time and memory, and ready
for the hospital. But, between you
and me, Pm looking for him right
soon.