Detroit evening times., 1941-11-21
.HideCanape.
Social Sport
Of Bounders
Hors d'oeuvres Poor Kin
Often Thrift Move
BY DAMON RUNYON

w congregation today on the
subject of the canape. We un-
derstand the word is pronounced
"can-ah-pay," though personally
we have not taken any chances
with it since the night we men,
toned it as "kuh-noppy," thus
winning great social disfavor.
" The canape takes various
forms. Sometimes 1t is a sad
sardine on a bit of unhappy
toast. Again it is gloomy olive
stuffed with some substance
which is calculated to perplex
the consumer and cause him to
wonder if he did the right thing
by his stomach in ingesting the
article.
Often weary. anchovy ap-
pears in the guise of a canape
and occasionally a chicken liver
a trifle tagged out from being
bsent from the chicken too
long.
Then we have the sorrowful
little sausage. usually skeWered
without mercy on a toothpick.
Though we must say we con-
slider this the best of all the
canapes. The toethpiek comes
in handy in dislodging from the
molars the remnants OF the
other canapes, or may, slightly
blunted, serve as an instrument
for a little surreptitious ear
cleaning. We cannot dismiss the
canape that provides toothpick
as wholly without merit.
THE purpose OF the canape
l. has long been debated. 1t is
usually passed around in some
of the forms we have described
in advance of a dinner. That
the canape is sometimes ac-
tally eaten by guests there can
be no doubt. this act usually
being committed when the host
ess has the guest under sharp
observation. but statistics COM
piled by interrogating buffers
and house maids indicate that
the consumption is less than
of per cent Of the output.
The buffers and house maids
report that they usually find
most of the canapes that have
been prepared for the festive
occasion at which they are
served. behind radiators, and
chair and sofa cushions. in ash
trays, flower pots and ming toy
jars and on window ledges.
We were once suddenly
caught by a sneeze and in yank-
ing a handkerchief from our
pocket, revealed to the stern
gaze of an uncompromising
hostess, no less than 10 canapes
mostly of something with cheese
which we had palmed during
the evening We think this Incl
dent is what gave rise TO the
subsequent somewhat general
report that socially we are a
bounder and a cad, and COM
pletely impossible.
A friend of ours used 10 make
a practice of slipping the can
apes urged upon him to the
household dog and one evening
he was detected by his hostess
feeding morose shrimp 10 her
peke and she made quite
scene about the matter.
She wanted to know II he
was trying to poison her peke
and our friend said oh, il you
figure that junk may poison
your peke. what will il do to
me? Then he took his hat and
left. We have always felt he
was in the wrong in taking
advantage Of an innocent peke.
WE HAVE heard 1t charged
w that the canape is really
designed as a cover to a bad
dinner. 1t usually Is served with
cocktails and the theory is that
if you can get four or five cock
tails into a guest and then load
in plenty of canapes in advance
of the dinner hour. he or she,
as the case may be. will be un-
able to detect any mouldiness
in the cuisine.
On the other hand, we have
also heard it said that the
canape is an economic maneuver.
the idea being that a well
canaped guest cannot eat as
much as one who comes in with
out warming up on them. The
canape is probably a poor rela-
tion of the hors d'oeuvres, but
must not be confused with the
latter.
The hors d'oeuvres an OBJ
ject of great dignity and ster-
ling worth. Where the canape
may seem to be suffering from
a slight case of anemia. the
hors d'oeuvres is nearly always
full-blooded and strong. The hors
d'oeuvres has personality and
zest. We speak as big hors
d'ouvre man.
Give us a loaf of bread and
a table load of hors d'oeuvres
and you can forget us for the
rest of the session. The fact that
the hors d'oeuvres may some
times be the very same thing as
the canape means nothing, ex-
cept that the former is gen.