Evening star., 1941-11-21

am !, so where can We go for
little winter vacation without look
ing like something not so choosev
cat dragged in? AS far as one can
Judge from the winter resort htera-
ture now flooding the mails, all re-
sorts are peopled solely by men
and women who need only 10 step
inside a frame to be hung in art
museums
Just to look around at the people
you meet on the street YOU wouldn't
think there were enough superb
specimens to decorate all the re-
sorts, but there must be because the
playground brochures feature them
by the thousands.
Every one that plays in California
tto look at the advertisements has
torso like that of a god or goddess,
and the same goes for Hawaii,
Florida, South America. Arizona and
Sun Valley. You can study the en-
tire output of publicity men With
out finding a knocked knee, bav
window, receding chin, thinning
pate or set Of bowed legs.
l am on the mailing list CT sew
eral resorts. and the pTOprletors
might Just as well know their s'-
vertising frightens. rather than
lures me Like 50 many ether mn
whose freshman cap and pledge pin
went TO their final rest in the attic
trunk years ago I'm not the type
that can feel entirely comfortable
in surroundings where ! am the
only eyesore.
What would ike Cand there must
be thousands who share my feeline)
is little winter resort that caters
to those who have few moth holes
in their bathing suits, hold their
noses when they dive into a pool
or through wave. and have 70 hold
their breath and pull in their
stomachs 10 even family resemble
an athlete.
( Without knowing anything about
advertising. 7 S,iu say there is a
p, place III Advertisements for Just
;. plain NJ. Johu Jore5. his wife
Beulah. and their children. one OF
whom wears braces for irregular
teeth.
Wouldn't a picture of John Jones,
having a whale of a time dipping
his spindly Tbdt average7 shanks M
the waves have as much pull" as
one, say. of Victor Matureish gent
riding an aquaplane on one leg and
holding aloft dream girl? There
are lot more spindly shanked John
Joneses than there are beautifully
| built daredevils.
Wouldn't more women be tempted
to try skiing if the resort literature
showed Beaulah Jones upside down
in the snow instead Of Carmen
Miranda, wearing s25oo worth of
ski clothes. swooping along pre-
cipitous trail that mountain goat
wouldn't dare without a guide?
In case you are curious for the
answer 1t is no and no in capital
letters.
No less a person that Steve Han
nagan Is my authority Mr.. Han
/ nagan is one of the countrvs dis
tinguished publicists and * nou
Turing customers to Miami Beach,
Sun Valley and Puerto Rico among
other places There is no question:
ing Mr.. Hannagans opinion. In
establishing himself as the No. /
publicity man in the country he has
| proved that, given enough pictures
of gorgeous gals doing nothing while
wearing almost the same. YOU car
come close to popularizing ANYTHING
from beriberi to a year in Jail.
Mr.. flanagan said my idea OF
/ publicity was strictly no good and
/ TO prove it would lure me to Miami
/ Beach this winter by his latest
! brochure which features pictures OF
an untold number Of potential Miss
Americas dancing before backdrop
graciously provided by the Atlantic
/ Ocean
! The more I look at the picture
/ the less I care whether Mrs. Beulah
Jones goes South this winter or not.
Guess you're right, Steve.
! Distributed by McNsuEht Syndicate frcp