Evening star., 1941-09-15

- - has caplnet
MeLsasrs. oficer been so
dangerously far out on a limb as
Ickes Is today. He is 2 feet far
ther out than the average pcssum
can get, even when treed by three
hounds and q farmer with a shot
gun.
Ickes started getting out on the
limb a few months ago when he de-
cided there was a tremendous short
age of gasoline in the East. No one
knows exactly what made him d.
eide this but the most plausible
explanation is that his best suit
came back from the cleaners with
out the smell of gasoline on 1t, and
he proceeded to sound the alarm.
Having made up his mind that
there was petroleum shortage,
Ickes went to work with A venge-
ance to make every one else believe
it. He issued statements on the
hour, every hour; he put q curfew
on filling stations: he rationed the
stuff and he urged the construction
Of q pipe line that would wind, boa
constructor like, from Texas to
Times Square.
Now. the Senate Oil Investigating
Committee has unanimously re-
ported that there Is no shortage Of
gasoline on the Eastern seaboard.
You can see where that leaves
Ickes. The first impulse Of those
Of US who have been caught on
highways at night with no gasoline
because Of the curfew, and who
Uttered our windshields with Ickes
"I save gas" stickers to such an ex-
tent that we had to drive with our
heads out Of the windows TO see
where we were going, Is to saw on
the limb he's on and let him fall
with one of his own "jackrabbit
starts"
But on sober reflection that isn't
the thing to do. We must all come
to his help. And the best way for
US to help him is to do our very
best to create q gasoline shortage,
thereby saving Ickes' face.
National unity Is what we need
in this country right now. We must
present q solid front to the world,
even II that front be Ickes' stuffed
shirt front.
We cannot afford at this time TO
lose any prestige in the eyes OF the
other nations OF the world, and We
certainly will If We don't help Ickes
out Of the tough spot he "a In.
As An American I don't want 10
admit to the world that one Of our
highest cabinet ofiicers Is the sort
Of statesman who can't tell the diff
erence between lots Of gasoline and
no gasoline, or who doesn't know
$4,000 empty tank cars from no
tank cars. That's . lot Of tank cars,
brother, for . man to overlook.
You might excuse fellow for not
seeing 21,ooo tank cars, but $4,000
tank cars-well. that's something
else again.
30, let's get together and create
. shortage that Ickes, from his
vantage point on the Limb. can
point to with pride. This won't be
easy. but here are = few helpful
hints on how to waste gasoline.
Don't walk q step. Even II you
are only going across the street
TO buy . paper, drive around the
block In your car TO get to the
newsstand.
Always leave your motor running
when you park.
Drive In a series Of "jack-rabbit"
starts.
Adjust your own carburetor 70
that even with lots of ooasting down
hill you can't possibly get more
than miles a gallon out of your
car.
Drive with your tires as nearly
nat Is possible. This creates . drag
that just eats up gasoline.
Use only high test gasoline In re-
moving those save gas" stickers
that Ickes has US. plaster all over
our cars.
If all Of us will cooperate and
observe these gasoline wasting
measures, there Is no reason why
BY this time next year this country
can't have . gasoline shortage sec
ond to none. and thus make 1t
unnecessary for the President 10
appoint . co-ordinator whose job it
would be TO coordinate Mr.. Ickes,
the petroleum co-ordinator.
Come on down, Mr.. Ickes, all Is
forgiven.
distributed By McNausht Syndicate, Ine)