The Waterbury Democrat., 1940-04-08

poStmarked 3 p. m. ana made the delivery here at 4:30 p. m. on the same day. Jim Farley should forge 8 new medal for the gen. tleman who whisks the mail bags between old Southbury and up- and-coming South Britain.
 We knew that somebody would eventually discover Yankees. The latest convert to our theory that Yankees are not obsolete, extinct, or plain defunct, is somebody named Walter Winchell. MT. Win chell makes one very grave error, however. He writes of natives of New York as Yankees. (That time the keyhole got twisted.)
 One of Nate Beardsley's bull calves got into fight and twisted a horn. Nate applied the proper remedy, took the scrapper out of the corral with the cattle that excited the calf, and thinks he now has 8 good chance for recovery.
 The birds are back! Probably no small town in the U. S. A. has more birds to the cubic foot of atmosphere than South Brit ain. We've got long birds and SBnovk h3~de. oI,,,v,Lu hSrJe 0~.Y thin birds; whistling birds and growing hens. If Eddie Box could have heard our birds on a morn ing when the worms are fat and plentiful, he would have wasted no money on towers in Florida. South Britain birds are the nOis- jest things next to 8 flock of re- tired school marms on 8 party line.
 Every owner of 8 small boy is workin,; overtime these days to think up ways to keep the kid away from the river until the wa ter warns up. The kids are lying on their dummies beside the best pools, gazing down into the depths, and planning dire things for the speckled trout that are, after all, matched SO that small boys can catch them.
 Sap is running better than during any spring in years. Over near the White Oak Graveyard, almost every maple tree has been tapped and the backyard of our leading maple syrup producer is wreathed in thin clouds of fra grant steam and the pungent OdOr of wOOdsmOke.
 It's funny, but nobody ever seems to have figured out a reason for inspecting the maple syrup folks who operate in the natural way. We've seen sap buckets, and drunk from them, containing everything from drowned chip hunks to twelve legged snap bugs, but we've never seen maple syrup inspector. There's something people have overlooked. A bacteria in a milk pail has to don protec- tive coloring to escape detection but a blacksnake could raise a family in the sap bucket with never college man snooping into the sweet liquid to investigate.
 Probably that's because SO few people know much about maple syrup. It's the common things that are regulated most drasticalIy. Take cOrnstalks: a man just cannot get anywhere with corn stalks any more. The city folks are familiar with cOrnstalkS. Corn stalks are common things; they're conspicuous. Nowadays everybody has visit iron, the cOrnstalk i'm spectOr whether he raises corn or just dahliaS.
 The fame of our Constable Mike Klesitz spreads far. Just the other day, @ New Haven man wanted to know who "that sawed-of cop" in Southbury was. We said he probably meant Constable KleSitz, and he said maybe that was the party. It seems that this gentle man from the seat of culture" to the south was once halted for doing eighty around curves. Mike gave him 8 gentle hint not to operate so fast. He made a friend. Law enforcement is that way |. 1t can be done without acting the louse. Maybe we could start a constabulary school here to train cops from the surrounding vil- lages. It's worth a thought.
 The bus boys who park at the new bridge while their passengers arc at work on the new training school have taken up horse shoe pitching. Too bad that Tip Hall isn't here to make better horse shoes for them,