Glacier County chief., 1940-06-21
By KATHLEEN NORRIS


the first important step
L that a girl takes as an in
Fvidual, Independent person.
Before that everything has been
bore or less discussed by the
emily, and advice and influence
fave been used literally by
fncles, aunts, mother, father,
Teryone. Even Anna, waiting
b the family table, has had her
Ford to say.
Don't you 60 off east to COL
kge, Miss Jane. You stay here
Fhere your friends are," says
lima. Mother needs you, lovey,"
fsys Grandma. "I'd just as soon
b little easy on the financial end"
,Snts Dad. ''Now, whether you 60
+ stay home, let me talk to you
bout your Clothes" says Aunt Mar
laret, who works in a frock shop.
Jane goes to college. Immediate
y the agonizing question of a So
'urity arises, and all the girls tell
lane such contradictory things that
BE frequently goes into hysteria be-
pre- deciding between the merits of
Kappa and Theta.
When she buys clothes her chum
foes along. When she gets an in
'atation Mother suggests a yes or a
70. The books she reads, the hats
'he wears, the dances and night
PUBS she frequents are all a mat
Ter of mass selection; Jane only
,isks to be allowed to do what the
'ther girls do.
Then comes the awful moment
|Ehen she has to make up her mind
|Fhether she wants to marry Dick or
:oesn't. Nobody can help her here.
Mother says she likes Dick, but then
|!he likes lots of other boys, too. Dad
PODS his head thoughtfully while
|nurmuring: mice young man. Very
good head" But that's as far as he
|vill go. The girls chorus to Jane
That they think Dick is divine, and
imong themselves say quite differ
mt things, and Jane knows that
hey do.
Loyalty First Problem.
In selecting Dick she learns, with
I little first premonition of the grav-
ny, the pain of wifehood, that she
has to be loyal to him. She can't
criticize him any more, or laugh at
him. She can't let anyone else criti-
cze him or laugh at him. One of
he bewildering features of an en-
gagement is this first obligation of
loyalty.
Often the effect of this on the en-
gagged girl is to make her feel lone
y. She wants everyone to approve
Of her choice, indeed to envy her.
And if Dick fails her in any way it
IS much more natural for her to turn
back to the old group, and see him
as they do, rather than sticking to
her own secret conviction that he
ean't do anything wrong. No saying
vas ever truer than that misery
wants company; sometimes one
sees engaged girls or young wives
acting very skittishly, saying things
hey don't mean at all, and all the
lime cycling Mama and the girls to
Zee how they feel about Dicks alb
'urdities, trying to convince them
hat she, the bride, thinks him rath-
n ridiculous, too.
And yet all the while she wants
linn to be, 100 per cent loyal to her;
I breaks her heart, it crushes her,
I he shames her or laughs at her
n the presence Of his old friends or
lis family.
Where Trouble Turks.
Old friends and family! II is in
hese quarters that SO much Of the
rouble arises, and there is need
4 loyalty. Sometimes a bride rath-
r likes her husbands brothers and
men friends, they are 20 admiring
md 20 much funi But there never
re- . husband yet who really liked
o have his wife's married sister,
~ aunt Matte. her high school