Worcester Democrat and the ledger-enterprise. (Pocomoke City, Md.) 1921-1953, 1940-04-05
~
from the
Democrats Pen

Well, Sir, real nice young MISS
came into our house one day last
week, tickled to death to show the
Missus piece of needlekork she (the
young Miss) was wearing in the form
of a well-fitting and good looking
dress, which she had made all by
her lonesome.
The Missus was sincerely surprised
and poured forth some well-deserved
and sincere compliments. That dress
was credit to the best artists in that
line. The missus asked:
did you make that all by your
self?"
eyes, Man,"
I was reading at that time, but
when I heard that answer, I sort OF
pricked up my ears, and listened to
hear it repeated. The necessity not
arising, thought I would make an
experiment on my own account. Sc
ventured to take part in the CONVEX
sation with a question:
didn't somebody give you a teen
sy-weensy bit of help on that gar
ment?"
"No, Sir!"
There it was again: eyes, Mann
to the Missus; "No, Sir!" to me
There was no mistaking about it.
thought it was time to say something
SO I let out with
"Look here, young lady, don't yor
know you are way behind the times
saying eyes, Mani" and "No, Sir!'
to your elders? Isn't your education
being neglected in the way of youth.
full pertness and smartness? With
whom have you been associating to
pick up such obsolete, old fashioned
polite answers like that? Really, you
should be looked after"
"Why, I thought that was all
right" she said.
"You did? That shows you need
some drilling in the way of converse
tional niceties. Now when the Mis-
sus asked you if you made that dress
all by yourself, instead of saying
Yes, Mani you know how yor
should have replied?"
"Ah, hah!" I explained.
"And when I asked you if yor
didn't get a little bit of help, yor
should have answered.:
"Na-ah!"
"And if I had asked you if yor
learned at school how to do that sort
of work, you should have grunted:'
"Uh, huh!"
"And if I had asked you if Miss
Mary Ann Smith was your Domestic
Science teacher, you should have
vouchsafed that information thusly:'
"Um-hump!"
"And if had asked you if you were
going to graduate this year, you
should have exultantly come back
with"
"Aw haw!"
"And if 1 had inquired if you ex
pected to go off to college some
where after finishing here, you should
never had replied mo, Sir!, yor
should have come out with something
like"
"Ye-ah!" quilting out a cigarette)
"And if I had been brave enough
to ask you one more question, if yor
had decided where you were going
you should have said:"
mix, the old man (meaning Dad
has got to find out first just how
much it's going to dig into his pile
But I told him I'd gotta go, and he'd
better think quick or I'd do it fol-
him.
Well, Sir, that young lady looked
at me as if she was seeing me for
the first time. She just didn't know
whether I was kiddin' or in terrible
earnest. She wantd to smile bras she
saw no encouragement on my IA
So, finally, she said:
Gall right, Sir, if that's the
I'll try to learn it." ]
eff you do" came back, III Sell
your father and mother to lock you
in a clothes closet for eleven days
feed you on stale bread and cheese
and not allow you to have another
pretty dress for three years. I'll tel
all the boys to forget you're alive
when the Junior Prom comes off, ane
never, to let you know when there's
a party. No, Sir, you go on in thai
sweet, old fashioned way, and I'll bel
you'll wear diamonds some of these
days."
Now, I don't know whether thai
young Miss took it all in or not; but
whether she did or not, she showed