The Waterbury Democrat. [volume] (Waterbury, Conn.) 1917-1946, 1940-02-12
BILL GARRIGUs


often wished he had been killed in
the wilderness and his body con-
sumed by the turkey buzzards.
You see, Jimmy Adams had two
failings, he believed that every
body was honest and he wanted to
get rich quick. What veteran
ever wanted wealth for is a mys-
terry, but Jimmy wanted it, and he
backed his desire with hard cash.
No sooner would Mr.. Adams cash a
pension check than some kindly
neighbor would remind him about
the extra big dividends paid by
Nancy Gold Mine. The Deacon
would talk about an so yield, the
stock salesman would give Jimmy
a cigar, and before long they had
him hooked. Jimmy Adams was
one of the very last men in this
valley to admit publicly that he
had been rocked and, even then,
he often said he enjoyed thinking
about what he might have done
with his earnings if Nancy Gold
Mine had been as good as it was
represented to be.
In addition to being a staunch
patriot and supporter of stock
pedlars, Jimmy Adams was sim
cere Methodist and, there are but
few folks on earth more Substan-
tial than Methodists, except Cath
olics, Baptists, CongregatiOnalists,
and other members of various
churches. Jimmy took his church.
going seriously, just like he took
soldering and investing. When he
had it, Mr.. Adams never failed to
contribute freely to every en-
deavor sponsored by the Methodist
church. He gave to the foreign
missions, to the poor fund, and
everything. It's too bad that when
it came time to give 1t to Jimmy,
they gave him both barrels. That's
the way. Sometimes it pays to be
honest and sometimes it's best to
be careful. John LudOrf has always
been honest and careful. Years
ago, John fiddled at every kitchen
dance on the Purchase and he
ne yer failed to deliver just a little
more music than folks paid for, If
they paid. Ludorf's violin was in
demand everywhere. Then John
got to thinking about tractor
farming and neglected his music.
One day, a neighbOrhO0d farmer
held an auction, and John came
down off the hill and bid in a
tractor. 1t worked, too. Well,
Johns tractor was a pretty good
investment, until the assessors
hi ard about it and then the
darned thing became a liability.
That tractor tax just about wOr-
ried John to death. 1t meant the
difference between profit and loss,
in a poor year. So Mr.. Lud0rf
started an investigation and made
the discovery that the former
owner of the tractor had never
paid a tax on the machine. Re-
search developed the fact that
many other local farmers, in good
standing and regular church gOers,
also had tractors that they forgot
to list. John Ludort dropped
word where it would do the most
good and continued the march.
According to the reports, he I'M
earthed more than forty more
tractors here that had never been
taxed. Thereafter, tractors either
had to be hidden under a haystack
by day and worked at night, or
they had to be listed legally. After
the dust settled on the tractor in
vestigations, Mr.. LudOrf took down
his fiddle and scraped out melody
of amazing beauty but the neigh
bOrs were so exhausted from hid
ing their tractors that they sell
dom held any kitchen dances.
Cobwebs gathered on the old dance
floors and the kids gave up square
dancing and took on swing.
When there's phenagling abroad,
John Ludorf's motto is DON'T
HIBERNATE! INVESTI-
GATE!"
Smokey Jensen has water
bucket turned upside down on top
of his chimney to catch creosote
from the smoke. Trimmed with
kerosene, this CONCEALED SCOT
makes an excellent tobacco-juice-
brown shingle stain that, when APP
piled to newly shingled roof,
makes it look old. Old roofs make
for lower assessments and easier
taxes.