Evening star., 1940-05-16
Etiquette at
Party
Street Clothes Are
Correct If Not on
Way to a Dinner
BY EMILY POST,

With Sucn q very snort space IN
which to answer q readers ques-
ton, I can't help feeling short Of
breath when handed q letter like
this one: please describe the whole
general procedure of what to ex-
pect at a cocktail party. How long
are we supposed to stay; what do
We wear: am I supposed to an
swer the invitation, which Is written
on the hosts Mr.. and Mrs. visiting
card? These people are almost
strangers to us, but they are very
hospitable and my husband thinks
we should accept. I have never been
to cocktail party before and don't
especially look forward to this
one"
Beginning. then, with answering
the invitation. If r. s. v. D. or
please reply" is written on it you
may telephone your answer to one
whom you know very slightly as
well as to an intimate friend.
But If you write an answer to the
stranger you should write on note
paper in the third person. Invita-
tions from intimate friends may be
answered on your ordinary visiting
card: with pleasure January g."
The inside Of a double card is not a
correct substitute for note paper,
nor is its length necessary for
three or four word message. II
there Is no request for q reply it is
not considered necessary to answer
since you are going. It would, how
ever, be courteous to send regrets
II you were not going.
You wear q street dress and a
hat, and your husband an ordinary
sack suit. He will probably 60 to
the party direct from his Office.
Even If he goes home to change,
ordinary business clothes are proper.
But II he is a formal type of per-
son, he may prefer starched shirt,
black sack coat and striped trousers,
which would also be correct in q for
NAL community. At a house where
people are known to stay overlong
you may perhaps stop in on your way
to dinner. In this case you would,
OF course, wear evening clothes.
II the invitation reads $3.50 to z"
you go at whatever time you choose
between these hours and stay for
as long, or as short, a time as you
like. If you are asked at a definite
hour-at 6, let us say-you 20
promptly at that hour or not much
later than q quarter-past.
Since a cocktail party is always
informal the roof Of your host
serves as an introduction, and you
talk with any one you find yourself
next to. The only particular rules
OF etiquette at cocktail party are
two. First, you need not take any
strong cocktails unless you choose to.
There should be an alternate choice
Of tea or plain fruit Juice or other
non-alcoholic beverage, and II there
Isn't, lack Of consideration is that of
the hostess for not providing any
thing for you, not yours for having
to say, mo, thank you." Second,
you must, however, say mo, thank
you" graciously and not with any
evidence Of criticism. You help
yourself to whichever appetizers
you like.
II you don't like these either, then
have q good time talkingl II you
have to leave very soon, you 60 to
your hostess and say. "I'm 80 sorry
We have to 60. Thank you for d
lovely time" (n this last u not
true, then say, Thank you for
thinking Of me-" or II hope to SEE
you soon" or whatever Is polite and
trueD
+ 4 + +
Dear Mrs. Post: Whom does Z
woman living alone seat at the op-
posite end Of the table when she
has people in to dinner7
Answer-n q member Of her fam
lily Is present, he is seated opposite
her. Otherwise, she chooses the
man whom she knows best. II she
knows no one better than the others,
then It doesn't matter which man
happens 70 b giyea this placa.