Smyrna times., 1940-11-14
The What-Not
Shelf

We would have enjoyed the SEN
ior Supper much more if it hadn't
been for one Ellery Ward Why he
had to be seated at the one avail
able table can be attributed only to
the miSchievouS hand of Fate.
Everything would have been calm
and serene had we not worn that
new hat. Wardie took one look
and howledl Our pretty new hat
with the bird on it, Then, to add
insult to injury, Wardie used all
the witty quips in his vocabulary
to express his opinion of women's
hats, ours in particular. Risking
nervous indigestion, we finished our
meal in haste and departed.
We anticipated such when we
bought the thing! Wearing the
hat from the store, we sheepishly
glanced first in one direction, then
in the other, then slinked down the
street as close to the buildings as
we could squeeze. We felt as
though the people on the street
were pointing and jeering and
prodding one another in the ribs.
We felt as guilty as though we had
just blackjacked three small chill
dren and stuck toothpicks in a
puppy's eyes.
Maybe women's hats are the
cause of all the hysteria in the
world today. Way down deep, they
are uncertain and jittery about the
appearance of their hats-so the
crazier the hats, the bigger the jit-
ters. What with the stovepipes,
fiyswatters, knitting needles, ice
cream cones, wimples, snoods, birds
and gardens the girls are wearing
nowadays, it is remarkable more of
us aren't in padded cells.
Oh welli We bought the
thing, 50 come hayday or holiday,
we shall wear it. However, for
warned is forarmed, and this is the
hunting season. So if anyone
should see, on a very windy day, a
prodigious critter with big red
wings Tapping over the town
Don't Shoot Or, Shoot if you
must our feathers red, but spare
our winter coat, she said"
We have heard of people being
absent-minded, but we think Cupie
Edmondson takes the cake. At the
end of last week, Papa Edmond
son received a letter from the
Women's College, U. of D. dignitar-
les, saying his daughter Estelle
had been deprived Of her class-cut-
ting privileges for the rest of the
semester, for the objectionable sin
of cutting a class after a holiday.
Papa wrote back to Cupie an
aren't you ashamed don't let
it-happen-again letter, with threats
of a reformatory where she would
have to wear uniforms and give all
her clothes to Gertie. Cupie wrote
back that it was all a mistake.
Election day Tuesday being a holi-
day, she got confused, thinking it
was Sunday and therefore Wednes-
day was Monday. Having no chem
istry on Mondays, Cupie sat in her
room. That, she said, was what
burned her up. She might have
been out having a grand time
1t seems that Mr.. and Mrs. Glenn
Sherman King, not wishing to
bother with dinner on election day,
to Hartly, where they
were told suppers were being serv-
ed by the church ladies. Arriving
at the church, they descended into
the basement, only to find no
tables set up, but many people sit
ing about. The people eyed them
with suspicion and surprise until
someone called out, Name,
please ?" The Kings were at the
polling place! Not wishing to vote
twice, they departed with frey
faces to find the supper being serv-
ed in the school house.
LITTLE THEATRE NEWS
The one-acter that the S. L. t. is
presenting for the Century Club at