Evening star., 1940-01-21
President Attends
Alfalfa Club Dinner,
Takes Part in 5kit.
Four New Members
inflicted; Song ond Story
Rule at Bouquet
(Guest list on page A-15.)

As the first President of the
United States who ever attended an
Alfalfa Club dinner, Franklin D.
Roosevelt last night dropped In on
the 9th annual banquet Of this
celebrated organization.
The President not only attended,
as guest of honor, but he entered
into one of the club S skits-a burles-
que initiation of four new members,
Speaker Of the House Bankhead,
Commissioner Melvin G. Hazen,
James E. Parker, local business
man, and j. Russell Young, White
House correspondent of The Star.
The President arrived at the BAN
quet hall of the Willard Hotel SO
quietly, surrounded by Secret Serv-
ice men, that hardly any one knew
he was present. The banquet got
away to rousing start by the en-
trance of a company of trained
Marine sergeants, all trained singers,
who were followed by fife and
drum corps. At the presentation of
the colors, they sang the old Marine
hymn Halls of Montezuma," fol-
lowed by George H. OConnor's S sing
ing of a patriotic song MY Own
United States"
From then on the banquet was
given over to song and story.
Dictatorship Set Up.
For the first time In its q years
of agricultural activity, the Alfalfa
Club failed to hear a formal address
by its president, who usually also has
the honor of being nominated for
the presidency of the United States
or the Alfalfa ticket.
This year, the newly elected presi-
dent, Joseph Hendrix Hines, set up
dictatorship-and dispensed with
the inaugural ceremonies.
With high silk hat atop his head
and raging cigar in his mouth,
Mr.. Hines entered the banquet hall
on a motorcycle with police escort,
to the popping of the exhaust and
the firing of revolvers. 1t sounded
like a South American revolution.
Because the newly elected presi-
dent was late for what were designed
as inaugural rites, the secretary of
the club, Charles Porterf1eld Light,
had taken the presidential seat
earlier:
Since our duly elected president
does not see flt to take part in these
ceremonies" said Secretary Light,
Il hereby promote Senator James
Francis Byrnes of South Carolina
from the second vice presidency to
the first and Senator Tom Connally
OF Texas from first vice president
to the presidency"
MIR. Hines Appears, However.
With that, Senator Connally took
the seat reserved for the president.
At that moment Mr.. Hines entered.
I heard about this conspiracy"
he said. ION the way here from
Prospect Hall, my home in the
Maryland Free State. So took the
oath of Office in the presidential
room at Union Station. - And
came here with the Gestapo!"
Sixteen of the biggest policemen
on the metropolitan force flanked
the self-appointed dictator as a
bodyguard.
"Now, boys, let's get going" said
his excellency.
Senator Connally, for the sake of
peace and the preservation of heads,
abdicated. A committee of three
Admiral Harold Stark, chief of
naval operations: Gene Tunney,
former heavyweight champion, and
Police Supt. Ernest w. Brown es-
corted Mr.. Hines around the hall
In triumphal procession.
up with Joe Hines and down
with Tom Connally," the police
escort shouted.
Immediately all hands rushed to
join the bandwagon. The Marine
Corps marched in, played and sang