The Waterbury Democrat., 1940-04-05
SOUTH BRITAIN BRIEFS
BY BILL GARRIGUS

BY BILL GARRIGUS
 Constable Mike Klesitz has 8 hen-haWk for sale. The hawk kill ed an old hen at the Klesitz farm. Klesitz, ST., shot and Mike got the thing mounted in Bridgeport. The wing spread is only slightly less than that of a Fokker bomber. Mike is selling because he needs the room.
 Michael Haselsteiner and Fred Kelly have started painting. Their firSt job was at Lake ZOar but they have other prospects. Michael sold out on the Purchase and started gas station on the Ox- ford road. MT. Kelly is also we'll known hereabOuts. Both men are of mature years and will exercise good judgment in their new enter prise.
 Strange tales continue to pour in about the clever ways in which local politicians attempt to secure votes. The latest come from the Purchaser. According to our in- forlnant, a lowlander once made 8 house-to-house canvass of the hilltop and left pound of coffee at every house. First, people thought he was selling coffee but it later developed that he was try ing to buy votes. Sanity goes out the window when a man has pol1- tical aspirations.
 Smoky JensOn wants to start a newspaper. He claims that we need lively weekly here and he thinks he has what it takes to set folks on their ear and start them reading the advertisements. Smoky wants to call the new sheet either "The Paradise Owl" or "The South Britain Wasp" Either title would be appropriate because Smoky has 8 sort of intellectual integrity all his own. We asked Smoky how he would handle cir culation and he had a first rate answer. He said that he would have a boy at every milk block on the day of issue, that he would make delivery to the menfOlks only. Smoky once lived on a party line and he firmly believes that the milk block is the best place to put out a paper.
 We've scooped Smoky on one of his features. He planned 10 use the story of the shoe pedlar in an early issue, but it appears unlikely he will need it when he finally secures the necessary backing. It seems that this shoe pedlar fooled his Model T up over the ledges into the Squaw Rock Country and called on a lady fair. The lady suggested that it was a nice day for ride so they started out for Danbury together. Over near Sandy Hook, the pedlar lost con- trol of the car and it struck an- other vehicle. Arrests were made and our local fixers had to hustle around to keep the local girl from going to jail, or from getting too much publicity.
 After the dust settled and the pedlar and his companion were safely back on this side of the county line, the gentleman who helped them out demanded an ex- planatiOn. "How did it happen. he asked. The pedlar blushed, cOughed, and fell silent. The lady came to his rescue. "'Twas like this," she said. "I was riding in back because there's so many gos- sips in town. When we started up the glen in Sandy Hook, Fred turned around to kiss me and a box of Numer 12s fell off the top rack and almost fractured his skull. He lost control and the car skidded."
 That's the way with South Brit ain Womenfolks. They stand by their men regardless. Their ioyal- ty in defeat is as firm as during victory. The only thing that wor- ried that shoe pedlar was, his de- fender and companion married a farmer. Perhaps the idea of shoe boxes filled with Number 12s was just too much for her. Anyway, she turned down an association with a commercial traveller to wash milk pails, slop the pigs, and collect eggs.
 Speaking of pigs, Ted Leibrecht of Bucks Hill, advertises in the Newtown Bee that his spring crop of pOrkers is about due for harvest, Ted came through town in 1885. delivering pigs and sell- ing ripe, red raspberries. Since then he makes our folks come to him. 1t pays to advertise If you've got good pigs.