The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1939-12-25

rstanding with her mother-in-
siderate of his wishes. for he Is
20 very considerable of mine-but.
Miss Grey. I dread spending a few
days with his misunderstanding and
belligerent mother. I know that IL
we get together for "jolly" little
family reunion II win end in the
same way those reunions always
do. My mother-in-law viii have
the doubtful pleasure of having her
flowed ones" under her roof, but
her ''un-loved in-laws" viii not
appreciate that shelter.
feel that we all have a right to
be happy at Christmas and don't
think that a selfish old woman
should ruin everyone else's time
with her sharp tongue and jealous
nature.
I do not see why I should cele-
brate the holiday by having to
watch everything do and apollo
gize for many harmless things I
say. I don't want to be made to
feel that I am a total loss so far
as getting dinner Is concerned.
In fact. I don't want to spend my
holiday by having to be on the
defensive" all Of the time I am
around an alertly disagreeable old
woman whose selfish love for her
family exceeds her tolerance and
spirit Of kindness toward others.
My husband thinks that should
ignore her constant sarcasm and
harping comments I don't think
] can.
He contends that II I love him,
I win put up with her actions. ]
contend that II he loves me he
win see TO 1t that our holidays are
kept for our own satisfaction--not
sacrificed for the pleasure Of a
woman who has lived her married
life to her own satisfaction and
now proceeds to interfere with her
sons.
/ don't want TO be mean and
unfair, Miss Grey. but I do want
this to be a MERRY CHRISTMAS.
How can 1t be when such a prob
lem presents itself?
YOUNG WIFE.
I know II sounds bromide to say
Forget 1t and be generous.
Naturally. you want to be happy
at Christmas and 1t also stands to
reason that II your mother-in-law
Is the type you picture her to be,
you win not have much fun il she
goes out of her way to make you
uncomfortable and you allow her
to upset you.
Well. it's Christmas time and ]
can assure you / have neither the
right nor the inclination to be
''preachy," but I do think this las
long as you have asked for my opin-
ion), that you should have a great
deal Of consideration for your hus-
bands feelings II he has always
been considerate OF yours.
II you have trouble with his
mother you can rest assured you
win not be hurting her half as
much as you viii him.
Men are the persons who suffer
most when two antagonistic fe-
males enter the field Of battle.
A smart young woman never
plays into the hands Of bellig-
erent older one. She Is generous
enough TO realize that the older
woman cannot really hurt her If
she (the younger person. remains
controlled and calm. Her stock
win 20 up in the eyes of the man
she wants TO please. for he win
appreciate her tact and diplomacy.
Further. II she is a thoughtful
person. she will take the older wo-
mans side OF the question into
consideration. A young woman
can afford to stand aside at times
because she has happy years before
her. while the older one knows
only too well that the joyousness
Of youth is lost to her forever.
Older women may be trying a
times Gas all human beings can be-
but let us at least give them credit
for having more common sense IN
many ways than carousing youth
and age-oid Romeos.
AS say. you asked for my ad.
vice. 50 here it 1t. Go to your hus.
bands home for the holidays. Be-
q good fellow" In his eyes ane
have your MERRY CHRISTMAS
In the knowledge that you havs
made him happy. / am sure h,
would do the same for you.
/