The Key West citizen. [volume] (Key West, Fla.) 1879-current, 1939-08-08

| West would end.
He could foresee exactly what
was going to happen. On the NOR
row he and Luella would proceed
to a certain drugstore and there,
on the scales, would end his rose
ate dreams of a wife and fireSide.
Luella, he knew, was a girl of
character. She had set him a task
and he had failed. That settled it.
Luella would never condone fall
ure. Already he could hear her
saying: "I'm sorry, Cutler. But
you miss by five pounds. It's no
part of my plan to journey through
life with something that looks like
a grampus out of condition. It's all
over. Cutler. We're washed up"
Yes, washed up. And all because,
doomed to embonpoint by some
heathenish deity, he carried the
curse of flesh. So he would 60 on,
he supposed, miserably, wretched-
ly, growing ever broader and more
bloated. And gradually he would
become pathetic, tragic figure or,
mayhap, an object of deriSion, al
luded to by all as the man who
couldn't make the weight.
While reviewing his doom, Jum-
DO became conscious of a delecta-
bic aroma. He glanced up and
perceived that he was passing a
one-arm joint from whose interior
this enchanting odor issued. He
bounded forward. This must not
be. This was temptation of ter
rible kind. But the bound did little
good. He was walking in a perfect
maze of eating houses. The next
thing he knew he stood face to face
with gentleman who was Tipping
pancakes in a restaurant window.
This time Jumbo's courage failed
him. He could not resist having a
look at the pancakes. He edged
close to the window and eyed them
as the ravening pike eyes the min
now. A slightly insane expression
came to rest upon his face. He
pressed his nose against the glass
and suffered. Within, the pancake
ripper, conscious of an audience,
performed miracles of jugglery
with pancakes.
Sick at heart, Jumbo turned
away. Was any woman worth such
agony? ASsuredly to be mad with
hunger was hideous enough with
out having the entire city of New
York ganging him with food. And
the end was not yet. There seemed
no limit to it. He had not pro-
ceeded twenty feet before he came
upon cat who was concerned
with fish head in the gutter.
Fishy
COMING to a dead stop Jumbo
~ stared at the animal, speech
less. This was the final irony. When
it transpired that the beasts of the
gutter might dine regally on fish
heads while the scion of one of
New York's better families went
about with an empty stomach,
things had got to a pretty pass.
Jumbo bestowed such a glare of
mingled envy and disapproval
upon the cat that the feline
snatched up the fish head hastily
and departed.
Jumbo breathed easier. He was
glad that fish head had gone. The
fish head had tormented and mad
dened him. But, with terrible clar-
ity, he recognized that he was not
out of the woods yet. He had dis
persed the fish head magniicently,
but he was anatomiSt enough to
realize that he could not dispense
his own stomach. And if something
were not introduced to that Stom-
ach in short order, he would 90
stark staring mad. Thinking care
fully, Jumbo made up his mind.
Food, of course, was out Of the
question. But he remembered that
Luella West, in her diScourSes on
dietetics, had ascribed certain sus-
tanning properties to alcohol. Very
well. He would test this theory.
A combination bar and lunch.
room doomed in the offing. Jumbo's
eyes dilated. And then he acted.
Emitting a woofing sound he
charged the door. The door gave.
The place was deserted save for
lugubriouS individual with de-
pressed muStache who stood be-
hind the bar polishing glasses.
"Scotchl" said Jumbo peremp-
torily, marching up to the bar.
Soda
The bartender looked at him
with sad, watery eyes. At the same
moment Jumbo noted a bowl Of
cheese popcorn which reclined on
the bar. He SHE'D as mustang
SHES at sight of the prairie rattler.
Whats the matter?" inquired
the bartender. starting. He was .
sensitive soul, given to nerves.
"N-nothing," said Jumbo. aHur.
~ up with that drink"
The bartender set the drink be.
fore him. Jumbo Quaffed il at &
gulp. Then, made affable by the
burning sensation in his throat, he
took cognizance Of the bartender
in social way.
Nice day." he said CONVERSE
uOnalIy.
The bartender looked as if he
were about to burst into tears.
'Oh, don't know he intoned
monotonously. at may rain"
Jumbo surprised his left hand in
the act Of sliding toward the cheese
popcorn. He withdrew it hastily.
sNonsense," he said to the bar
tender. why. there isn't q cloud
in the sky"
The bartender smiled superb
orly.
Don't let that fool you" he said,
in measured accents. Things hap
pen when you least expect them
Yes?" said Jumbo, in the tone
of one who would hear more.
Like last winter" the bartend-
er said, my sister Minnie goes out
in the morning. Fine, clear day, il
was. Almost like spring. Well
he paused and stared hard at