Evening star., 1939-05-16
Laying Blame
On Others a
Bad Habit
A Weak Will Often
Traced to Weak
Constitution
BY ANGELO PATRI,

If there is one childish habit that
annoys parents and teachers more
than another it must be the one
that is expressed in, "He made me
do It," Knowing that we have been
unable to make" him do the ordi-
nary routine duties at times, even
struggling hard with him to &C
complish the simplest of them, his
calm and decided statement, He
made me-" is almost too much for
the most patient.
How could he make you If you
didn't want to?"
Il couldn't help it. He made
me do it."
That's as far as you're going to
get in that argument so you may
as we'll drop it before you lose your
patience completely. Drop it and
begin asking yourself why this child
is SO easily influenced to do the un-
desirable things and neglect the de-
sirable ones.
1t is idle to question this child
about it. Study him for the answer.
1t lies in his hidden self and it's
basis may be some physical weak
ness that is durable. Weak will is
often traceable to weak constitu-
ton. The difficulty may be a lack
of nutrition, lack of some essential
secretion, lack of nervous force. The
lack may be such that a competent
children's specialist can remedy, and
1t is worth the trial.
Punishment rarely helps the sit
uatlon. The child fully believes that
he was pushed into this trouble and
that he is not to blame. You can
use many words to prove to him
That he is all wrong about it, but
his mind is not receptive to any such
idea. 1t Is safely intrenched behind
the defense, HE made me do it,"
Better save your energy and devote
IT to building up the health, direct
ing the education and the associa-
tions Of this child.
This does not mean that he is to
be saved from the consequences of
his mistakes. When his teacher
keeps him after school give him no
comfort. When she gives him a low
rating let him understand that he
earned 1t. When he suffers the in
dignation of those he offends let him
take it. But keep up his cure. En-
list the help of the child specialist.
the teacher and his older brothers
and sisters if there are any.
We had one of these unhappy
children in the school and he not
only did what mischievous school,
mates told him to do, but, enriched
by experience, he struck out on his
own. Then we knew that he had
reached the stage where he could
be reached. His own will and pur-
pose. by some means, had been
awakened and sent into action.
Caught in some mischief he had
originated he had to own that he,
and he alone, was to be blamed
for the offense, but habit was strong
~~~~>~ AN os%ANs, oaU WOulOll VI OOllS
1t If Michael hadn't shown me how
one time"
One must be on guard with such
children lest the habit continue
when the cause of the original diff
Guilty has been removed or its phase
is ended. 1t is easy enough, once a
child's will is engaged, to direct him
and correct him. All the teacher
had to say to set this one right was,
You must enjoy being a stooge for
Michael. Rather dumb of you to
put yourself in bad just to please
him. It must make Michael feel
big to boss you about so you make
a monkey of yourself before the
whole school. Why don't you take
your place and stand on your own
feet?"
But first, one must find and re-
move the cause Of the weakness.