The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1939-01-05
THE MISSISSIPPI in
MODERN DRESS
BY NINA WILCOX PUTNAM


! NOMEBODY down in Washington
seems to have got hold of the
~ idea that one of the things ev-
erybody is entitled to. the same
as air and water and that much adver-
tised place in the sun, Is electric light.
It's no secret that the government,
having practically nothing else to at
tend to, has decided to build a few
electric light plants, harness up a
flock Of rivers, including, some say, the
mississippi, and so generally attempt to
make the sun feel cheap and dated.
Quite an Illuminating Thought.
AS far as city lighting goes. must
say l don't give much Of darn to
whom l don't pay my electric light
bills. When have the dough and the
collector catches me, pay last months
bill. It's over two years since | paid
the current bill for the current, if you
absorb my meaning. So far the pri-
vately owned company has done Moth
ing about shutting off anything except
my apologies. And SO, aside from a
mild impersonal curiosity about what
will be done for the stockholders Of
the old outfit, I'm not taking sides, one
way or another
All | wonder about this public"
tina! haD ownership of my electric
curling iron, is what the government
will do if the day comes when L can't
ovan nav 1oct months biII9 WIFI tbou
actually cut off the juice, or will they
appropriate enough public funds to take
care of such unpaid bills? Dunt esk.
Manana pOr la manana, as the Spanish
say; meaning ish kabibble. In other
words, who am |, to ask what appro-
priations are appropriate and which
are not? I'll start criticizing along
that line as soon as can set my mind
off of earning enough money again to
take care of tomorrOw'S hamburger.
Along in 1912 maybe.
Meanwhile, let the government worry.
Don't worry, they will!
But, being public spirited SO long
as no campaign contributions are de-
manded of me, l take an interest in
these things even if | have no capital.
Public affairs are about the only thing
you can draw interest on free. Some
times you draw more than interest you
draw a fight. But before you strike,
remember l am a woman and l am
not your wife's mother.
But to get back to the other Bright
electric project we were talking about,
/ mean Harvesting the Mississippi or
whatever they intend doing to cleo
trify the Miss-oh heck, you finish
spelling it, I'm all worn outl But you
know what mean, it's the electrifying
of the valley it runs through. If they
are really going to harness those rush
ing waters, we'll all | can say Is, boy
that's one mule of river to harness.
They've been trying to do 1t by sand
bagging for a number of years, with
out result. No matter how loud you
yelled whoa at her, she jest naturally
wouldn't behave or stand still. And
if the government is now really going
to Moses that ornery body of water,
part her with q rod and make her go
to work-in other words, il the Mis-
sissippi intends Musculing In on Mus
Gle Shoals, all l can say is, Murray,
huhuroo, and hurrah, whichever is the
correct spelling.
The first benefit will be the abolition
of song-writers who have been telling
that river to roll along for quite long
enough l don't suppose we can ex-
pect any such good luck as Ending that
the government will discover a way
of forcing those yeggs to go down to
some CCC camp and get their feet
wet in Mississippi waters SOS they'll
catch cold and die. But perhaps when
modern engineering has taken some Of
the backwoods romance out of the val
ley, the song writers will give another
river a Publicity Break and we will be
turning the radio off because 1t is
playing my Collar, the Colorado, and
You for the sixth milllonth time. NOT
that we really give Boulder Dam.