Evening star., 1939-07-28
Mistake
That Parents
Often Make
Giving Privileges
To Child That
Ruin His Life
BY ANGELO PATRI.


Children are born imitators sc
1t Is easily seen how the young
ones breaking into their teens, ano
with all the feelings of importance
their new growth gives them, want
TO be grown-up in every possible
way. They want to dress as their
elders do and they want the same
social experiences their elders en-
JOY. Unfortunately to want is tc
have very often these days and the
result is some sadly spoiled, dis
illusioned children.
A 13-year-old girl is not ready
for entrance into society in the
commonly accepted meaning of the
term. Girls of that age are not
ready for late parties, for sophisti-
Gated plays and movies, for the
present-day dances with their ac-
companying excitements, nor for
the attentions of fedgling youths
This needs no argument. The situ-
ation Is plain. And yet we see
these unfortunate children apine
their elders in these ways and los
ing the precious years of their grow
ing time.
Any organism forced into growth
is spoiled. 1t never has quite the
beauty, the power, the health of the
one that grows in its natural
rhythm. Girls and the boys as well
who are allowed this forced growth
pay the penalty in ragged nerves
half-baked impressions, mistaken
opinions and wrong ideas. They
think that success in life depends
upon popularity, their word for ev-
erything that brings them into the
forefront Of the noise and excite
ment Of the superficial life they
enjoy. They think that love is ex-
pressed In petting, that a good time
is OF first importance in life. and
that frantic running hither and
thither, a blather of telephone calls
and a racing of motors gets them
somewhere other than out. Be-
fore long they are worn out, dis
interested and a problem for their
teachers and parents.
The whole business is so unneces-
sary, and futile, and cruel that its
existence seems incredible until one
comes face to face with it. 1t is
worst IN our upper middle class
families, the most intelligent fam
lilies in the land. Just why, save
that parents are kind and indulgent
and unknoWing, it would be hard
to say.
1t seems to me that children
ought to understand that they are
children, with certain rights and
privileges, and that grown people
are adult and have their own rights
and privileges. A child of 13 should
be dressed suitably, in simple pref
ty clothes, with none of the acces-
sorry touches allowed her mother or
older sister. She should be on a
chlld's schedule of hours, with plen-
ty of play in the open air, and an
early bedtime. Her health and her
mental development as well, depend
largely upon her healthy growth
during these next few years. She
should, if necessary, be protected
against herself. And that goes for
the boy, too, although he is usually
bit behind his sister in asking for
social recognition.
This matter is in the hands OF
the parents, the mothers first. These
13-year-olds are still children ano
they still look to their mothers fol-
leadership and understanding. II
is difficult when other children are
allowed the prerogatives of their eld-
ers but right is right and it is GER
tainly right to preserve a child's
childhood for him when he is un-
able to do so for himself. Moth
ing can make it up once it has been
lost. And it is so easy to protect
at the beginning.