Evening star., 1939-08-10
Patience Best
In Teaching
The Child
Very Unnecessary
To Correct Him
Immediately
BY ANGELO PATRI.

Parents often get into the way Of
living too close to their children,
seeing everything they do, hearing
every syllable they utter, interpret
ing all Of it on the basis of their
own feelings. This gives them un-
necessary suffering and puts pres
sure on the child that is likely to
be unhealthy.
The worst Of this situation, and 1t
has many bad points, is the idea
that something must be done, at
once, about any and every express
sion the child makes. If he is rude
and noisy, if he is destructive, if
he interrupts a conversation OF his
elders, If he spoils his clothes, some
thing must be done Immediately to
teach him better.
Following this line of duty will
keep any parent and child in hot
water from years beginning to years S
end. There is no end to it, and
not much reason, either. Many of
the annoying things children do are
expressions OF passing phase of
growth and can we'll be passed by
with an uplifted eyebrow, or silence
and forgetfulness
All little children are destructive,
all Of them spoil their clothes, all
OF them interrupt. When they make
mistake redirect their attention
by giving them something interest
ing to do and they will get over the
habit of destructiveness. Let them
have play clothes and ignore what
happens to them and they will soon
get over that difficulty. When they
interrupt, wait in silence for them
to finish what they are saying and
then direct them to some pleasant
occupation rather than shout them
down. A few well-directed lessons
like this will lay the foundation for
better manners. But it is entirely
unnecessary, and highly wasteful of
human energy, to try to keep up
with every movement a child makes
and fit punishment to 1t.
Punishment should be directed to-
ward education. 1t should help a
child see a better way more clearly
Used that way it is needed rarely
because redirection takes its place
The best punishments are those
that take the form of logical con-
sequences of the child's behavior.
If he raises his toy automobile
above his head and smashes it on
the pavement, don't dry his tears
with promises of another one Just
say, 1T is too bad you broke 1t
Now you have none to play with
And let him feel the inconvenience
his action has brought upon him.
1t is not possible to do this as
often as we would like, but 1t car
be done sometimes and we ought tc
take advantage of those times fol-
education. The most effective edu.
cation a child can have is the ex.
periences his own behavior bring:
to him. If we can direct those expe.
riences wisely we do well.
In the meantime, rest little. Yol
are not alone in the rearing OF thl!
child. There are within him force.
that work toward his better growth
and they work on your side, en-.
couraged by your wise attitudes. AL
children tend toward goodness, to-
ward normal, healthy development
Given halfway decent training they
come through IN good shape.
Next time you feel obliged to dt
something about something thu
child has done, wait a while, thlnl
it over Maybe time will take thu
load off your back and do the worl
much better.
Mr.. Patri has prepared a leaflet
entitled "Convalescent Children"
| in which he felIS m RENTS hov IN