Evening star., 1939-10-05
Raising Child
Not Called
Slavery
Real Gratitude to
Parents Always
Is Voluntary
BY ANGELO PATRI.

whats the good OF having chill
dren, shaving for them all your life.
only to have them go away as~soon
as they are able, and forget all about
you?"
Maybe the answer to that ques-
ton lies in the use of the words
good and Shaving" Most parents
have children because they wish to
have them for their own pleasure.
OF course, the children had nothing
to say about it. Once the children
arrive they are quite at the disposal
of their parents, who can treat them
so as to attach them with everlast-
ing affection or drive them away to
live their lives apart. I think it is
all In the attitude the parents take
toward the children.
This question begins with What
is the good The parent ex-
pected to be repaid in some way by
the children. Perhaps it was the
love of the children that was ex-
pected. The fact that 1t was ex-
pected indicates that it was de-
manded, for such expectation is al
ways made known to the children
Did you ever hear of love that was
born, that fiourished and grew
strong, at demand? Nobody has
ever yet seen nor felt that love.
And that other word, shaved" :"
stands for trouble in any home
where 1t is breathed. When a par
ent brings child into the world
she must expect to take care of him
for many years, for a child is help
less beyond all other creatures of
this earth. 1t takes years of hard
work, years of anxiety and patience,
and even suffering and sacrifice, to
rear a child. But his presence in
the home was ordained by his par
ents. It is scarcely fair then to
speak of the care given the child as
slavery"
Nobody can hope to keep his feel
ings secret from his family and
friends. What one thinks speaks as
clearly as what one says. If par.
ent feels his service to his child Is
slavery, and If he is expecting a
return good" for his service, the
child knows 1t and, being q human
child, resents it. Resentment, grudg-
ing and selflshness never creates
love. Nor do they inspire gratitude.
Maybe a story a friend OF mine
told me will explain what I am try
ing to say. met him Unexpectedly,
III a part of town out of his usual
way. He hailed me, and together
we rode toward home in his car.
We've just moved mother into a
more comfortable apartment. She
needed more sunshine and quiet
than she had downtown, so Matt
took this place. Mothers close to 90
now, and brisk as bee. Not many
left of the old kind like her.
She brought us up, II of us, on
the strength of her back, her arms
in the Washtub. Father died, and
there she was with the lot of us. She
brought us all through-God bless
her-and it's our turn now to show
her we were worth it. And when
you have II sons and daughters, all
fighting to do something more for
you, it's something. There's nothing
like having to pull together to make
you stick together. We're hoping
she lives a hundred years. They
wouldn't be long enough for us to
tell her what's in our hearts to say"
Do you think that Mother Gal
lagher ever talked about what good
the children ever would do her? Or
about how she shaved for them?
They were her life and her JOY, her
husband and her religion, her ALL
And they knew 1t. Now they are
eager to have her know that they
knew it.