The Key West citizen. [volume] (Key West, Fla.) 1879-current, 1939-07-20
FOUR BLIND DATES

By EDWIN Rutt

Nov. now said Tacks sooth-
ingly, "don't get excited. Just take
it like q man and We'll be around
shortly"
He replaced the receiver, re-
joined Van and Jumbo.
who was that?" Van demanded
sharply.
BILL" said Tacks. still grinning.
well. what did, he want?"
He wants us" said Tacks, ito
come around to the Forty Sixth
Street Police Station and bail him
out. ] don't know the details, but
the charge is assault and battery.
| It appears that William has poked
some guy called Diffenderfer in the
jaw"
Fruitless Fencing
a Pc" said Miss Dorothy South,
"A IF you had one more brain
than you've already got. you'd still
have just one"
Mr.. Ape Coletti gazed at the lady
who held such a trifiing opinion
of his mental qualifications. Mr..
Coletti had q blue, granite-slab
jaw; close-cropped head; the neck
of rhinoceros; and ears which
could have been sold for tent flaps.
No thing Of beauty and Joy for
ever, Mr.. Coletti. He looked In fact
like something which arrives in
| the wee sna' hours after bout
with lobster a la Newburg and
pistachio ice-creann. But If not
exactly handsome, Mr.. Coletti gave
an impression Of extreme capable
ity. He was short and squat, with
t0o-long arms and powerful shoul-
ders, built generally along the
same lines as barge designed for
Eheavy work around the back
streets Of Venice. He possessed q
pair of small beady eyes, light
blue in color, in which ieapt not
the light of human intelligence.
These eyes now wandered over the
1.-THE figure of Miss Dorothy South
as he rummaged what he was
pleased to call his mind for some
suitable rejoinde1 to her terse
statement regarding the contents
of his Uranium. He succeeded final
ly in bringing forth nifty,
Yeah?N he said.
"Yeah, confirmed Miss South.
Imagine you having the crust to
bawl me out-MEl Why, you big
babooa. but for me you'd have
been overlooking the Golden Gate
from a third-story window in
Alcatraz long ago"
Ape Coletti cast about him,
found a convenient { able and
pounded it with hairy fist.
'Iissen," he said, "dat amt got
muffin to do wild it. Wot I'm tellin'
you Is dis: Dey amt no dame can
give me de rum aroun'.n
well. darling" said Miss South,
in dulcet tones, who's giving you
the run-around?"
Mr.. Coletti arose and pointed a
short accusing finger at Miss South.
So might Napoleon have comport-
ed himself when he got the goods
on the Empress Josephine. So
might great Caesar have charged
Cleopatra with being a two-timer.
But IL these ladies Quailed before
that awful digit, they were not Of
| the same caliber as Miss South.
Miss South merely snioothed her
platinum hair with slim left hand
and laughed in Mr.. Coletti's face.
Ape. she said, "many's the
dumb-bell that's come hot off the
lower East Side. But you win the
buck-toothed shaving-brush."
IS dat a wisecrack?" inquired
Mr.. Coletti, with scorn.
Miss South ignored this.
Listen Ape, she said, do you
know who that guy is?"
It don't make no never mind"
Mr.. Coletti said. Mex time catch
him parkin' aroun' dis Joint, I'm
gonna kiss him so hard wild a pair
Of brass knucks dat he'll come to
all covered with daisy roots"
Is that SOL" said Miss South.
II says dat's so. .
Miss South appeared to consider
it time to drop this fruitless fenc-
ing
9Sit down, Ape" she said. To
begin with, the gentleman that's
got you all hot and bothered IS
none other than Mr.. Van Ripper
/ Hardness.
Mr.. coletti looked as If ie would
like to spit. :
Van Rypperl" he exclaimed
disgustedly "Wot a sissy rnoni-
Ekerls
Us It" Miss Snnth inquired
sweetly, amy worse than Hafold?s
Mr.. Coletti WINGED. Among the
other millstoneS which had been
hung around his rhino neck at
birth was the wholly unsuitable
name OF Harold. Under Harold
the Pride of the Colettis had been
forced to chafe until, having won
his spurs in gangland, the more
| picturesque and acceptable cogno-
men of Ape" had been bestowed
upon him. But though the horror
i OF Harold was fast becoming a van
ishing memory, memory still car
.ried its sting.
! Nobody" the Ape stated now,
"can call me Harold an get away
| wild it.
| Miss South waved hand.
sim not interested in your fool
iSh NAME" she said. I'm asking
you il you know who Van Ripper
Hardness is?''
Il eAns I'm tellin you, replied the
| Ape. dat ! amt never hold Of
i him.
j (which shows : said Miss South
| promptly, shat II you'd did q little
] more reading Of the Social Regis
ter and 4 little less Of Daily Racing
i Form, you'd know Van Ripper
/ Hardness comes from one Of the
oldest and richest families IN New
York"