Evening star., 1939-02-14
Not
by
Discipline
Parents Guidance
Prepares Child
For Future
like a bOuter pigeon.
By ANGELO PATRI.

Children love their parents, their
mothers in particular, in spite of the
trials and tribulations they may en-
dure together. The togetherness is
what is important. and it has to be
spiritual as well as physical. Mere
housing is not true togetherness.
There must be something more, the
inner relationship that exists nat
urally between the mother and the
children. Where this exists it holds
against all strains and stresses of
daily living.
Some mothers are afraid to deal
wisely with their children because
they are afraid the children will not
love them if they cross them in any
way. Even when they know that the
children are getting into lax ways,
or habits that will in time handicap
them, they hold back, letting "he
wants to" decide the matter.
This Is not only grave mistake
of judgment, it is a sin against
childhood. Children must depend
upon the wisdom and good sense of
their parents. They are not born
with the knowledge and the under
standing Of life that enables people
to live comfortably and successfully
in society. That knowledge has to
be gained by long years of service
to a standard of behavior and
through the experiences that such
service gives them. In their early
years they do not know enough to
feed themselves, take care of their
health, or use their opportunities
for learning. All this must be di-
rected by the mothers and fathers.
Children are bundle of wants.
Their wanting is what drives them
to learning. If their wants are Sc
lected wisely the learning is valu-
able. If it is undirected and willful
it Is wasteful and injurious. Take
the list of wants 3-year-old child
expresses in a day. He wants or he
doesn't want all experiences that
touch him.
He wants to pet strange dog.
He wants a handful of lollypops.
He wants the cats tail, the grocery
Boys cart, the policeman's hat, a
drink of milk, a pail and shovel, a
ride in the car, mother to play with
him, granny's specs. He does not
want his hands washed for lunch.
He does not want his egg. He wants
to eat with his fingers. He wants to
share granny's coffee. He wants to
get up and run about the house
and come back to the table for oc-
casional mouthfuls. He wants a
nap. He does not want to go to
bed for it. Mother must hold him.
He wants to see who rang the bell.
He wants to know what is In the
bundle and wants to open 1t all by
himself, although it is the family
wash.
This goes on through his waking
hours. Somebody must say no or
yes and direct him so that the ex-
periences he has and the knowledge
he gets from them tend to keep
him growing in intelligent ways of
cooperation with people.
Every now and then q child will
put up fight for what he wants.
If what he wants is good for him,
or even is harmless without any
value, he should have 1t. One says
yes as often as possible. But If his
wants are not good, he is not to
have them regardless of the wear
and tear of battle on the family
nerves. Mother must hold out.
Perhaps it will help to know that
children are grateful in the end
for the 1irmness that steadied their
waywardness, that they love those
who stood between them and their
mistakes. I have heard children
say with great pride and affection
MY mother-my father-would
never let me do such q thing"