The Waterbury Democrat., 1939-07-19
Walter WillcIieu
 Or Br0ad7gay trrad. Mark Registered, Copyright 1888. Daily Mirror Inc

taunts and garbage at him. To the complete consternation of the young ruffians, our hero showed an agility surprising for his years and set them to route with a handy display of the manly art. Faith" laughed honest old Brigid, the apple-woman of Trinity, as she saw the gamins take to their heels, tits the mur- therin' boyo viz are, ye shpalpeen, wurra wurra and alanna."
 Unbeknownst to me (for the read CTS must already have discovered the boys identity a portly gentle man of late middle age, whose grave mien and substantial bearing marked him as the proprietor of a large mercantile establishment, had been watching the encounter ap- provingly. He was about to felici- tate me on my plucky stand when 8 shrill scream rang out. A run away horse, hitched to a carriage containing a frightened girl, was careening madly down the street. The fair occupant of the vehicle, distraught with terror, was vainly attempting to regain the. reins but without success. Judge the mer- chants perturbation when he dis cerned the lineaments of the young lady as those of his only daugh- ter. But before he could give vent to his anxiety, I had thrown my self at the horses head, dragging the foaming steed to his feet, un- hitched him from the carriage, re- vived the half-fainting heiress, pre- sented my card to MT. Pascudnik, and asked for her hand in marriage Needless to say, my bravery and business acumen had not failed to create deep impression. and by nightfall I found myself both son. in-law to the pepper tycoon and 8 junior partner in the firm.
 To bore you with the deatils of the next few years would only bore you. Suffice to say that my as- tuteness, tact, and social charm plus discreet use of arsenate of lead, won me advancement over the other junior partners. Promo ton followed promotion, and since 1t did not occur to anybody to or der an autopsy, the day came wher Pascudnik meant Perelman and vice versa. Tn time I wearied o1 the pickering and cares of business and retiring just ahead of a sud- den audit, employed the next few years in travel and study. My first love, dynamite, again absorbed me and I spent many profitable hours working out formulae and testing new compounds. You may recal such trifling exploits as the Black Tom explosion, the recent outrage'
 in England Commonly credited tt the Irish Republicans), and SC forth. These were purely experi. mental on my part and 'unimport' ant save for the data they sup piled my notebook.
 The future? am afraid that must leave that in the hands ol younger more adventurous men For myself, I am content to live quietly on my Bucks Country farm immersed in qualitative analysiI and chiggers. Occasionally blov up a troublesome stump or a neigh bor's dam just to keep my hand in but truth to tell, mass violence in terests me less and less. Of al evening you will find me on m. porch smoking fragrant mixtur of cheap tobacco and smokeless pow der, and staring out at the dark ening hills. Some day.. in mor ambitious moment. I may even min them and blow up few trouble some neighbors, but taking on thing with another, prefer to le life pass me by. For an old com rade like myself, Walter. there wil be a cooling draught of nitrogly cerin at hand should you stop b. of a hot midsummer afternoon. Jus ask anybody in Tinicum Township for Your friend as aIWayS,
 g. J. FIREMAN: