The Waterbury Democrat., 1939-04-06

kOvAVt 44VA6AAbNAe UAAS 4eSOAAASS AAJ ing the hammer and sickle, was tied up at the Jersey City docks with cargo for the Soviet pavilion at the Worlds Fair he was ex- pected to fume and berate.
 He didn't at all. It was no news to Mayor Hague that red Russia's vessels tie in at the Jersey City piers. He doesn't discourage them. Instead, he sends a corps of muri- cipal guards around to keep an eye on the USSR's property and possible trouble-makers. And he doesn't mind if they have 8 glimpse of the husky lady sail- ors who help to man Soviet boats.
 But it is a diverting paradox to approach Jersey City, Hague's castle, from the harbor with the hammer and sickle flying over 1t. Nearsighted, Maybe
 Out on Long Island, a school has been hampered in it's ac- ademic pursuits by the constant drone of airplanes over head. The schoolhouse is near 8 couple of private airports.
 So, to preserve order and get on with the curriculum, a huge sign was painted on the roof of the schoolhouse: SCHOOL QUIET PLEASE!
 It is much worse now, for the pilots are making steep descents, the better to read the sign. Towel of Babel
 I never knew how many dialect experts there were in Manhattan until I glimpsed the National Register the other day-the Reg ister which lists all the dialectic- ians available for the ether waves.
 Skipping the British, Scotch, Irish, Russian, German, Greek, Norwegian, Chinese and so on what impressed me was that there are quite a number of folk in New York who can be called upon to chant in authentic Hindustanti or Polynesian whenever there's a need. And the Register also can provide you with a Malayan ac- cent-if you should ever nneed one.
 Shoo! Horse
 The saddest fellow in the gall lery of greeters is the doorman at the Diamond Horseshoe, which harks back to New York's Gay sos. He is appropriately clad in crimson livery trimmed with 8 spacious fur collar.
 Now he wouldn't mind this ele- gant get-up, were it not for the mounted policemen's horses. These four-footed minions of the law like to loiter around him.
 They find his fur collar den- cious, as palatable as a lump of dampened sugar. And they have been nibbling at him now for an entire month.
 He is thinking of begging the proprietor to change the police horses died to chinchilla or sil- yer fox. But the proprietor does not belong to the horsey set and doesn't care. So the cops mounts will have to content themselves with muSkrat.
 Standee
 AS the Worlds Fair hears it's opening, impresario Billy Rose is being besieged by platoons of workers of wacky wonders. One weird mystic, allegedly from the drama-shops of Bombay, has been haunting Rose for a fortnight now, with plaintive plea that he be permitted to repeat his India habit of standing in one spot for the entire duration of the Fair.
 Other vertiginous pilgrims have included a soft-spoken young lady with trained ocelot, a pioneer with an observation balloon which he wishes to park directly over Times Square-the balloon being outfitted with a radio studio, loud- speaker, etc., and troupes of mid- gets and goliaths by the dozen. Unclothed Coterie
 As for young ladies wishing to remove their raiment publicly, in return for a weekly stipend and a few pictures in the rotogravure sections, these wenches have con- cocted more ways of impeding than Sally Rand ever conjured in her widest flights of fancy. Topmost among them is a young -mid-western Venus who has act- ually trained a fleet of white doves to flutter skywards with her lingerie in their beaks.
 And plans have been made by two exhibitors of freakery to take over large emporia on Broad- way for the display of half-boys- half-lobsters, bearded females, nine-legged calves, fire-eaters and every other known fraud in the amusement ken.
 The moonstruck era is upon the town.