The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1938-04-08
Abrams KdYoes Bdttling
Reporter in One Round
Realistic Touch Is
Too Much for
Our Expert
By BOB ADDIE


So you want to be a fighter,
huh? Prop up those pillows,
nurse, and bring some more of
that liniInent. My muscles are on
a sit-down strike. My left side is
glowing like a movie sunset. MY
breath is coming out only under
protest. My nose is so flat it
smells everything I hear and my
right ear is blooming like a cherry
blossom-even despite the cold
weather.
Have I been a wreck? Well, not
exactly. My boss had the cute
idea to inject a little realism
(Which is a dangerous thing) into
my daily rounds. I, of all people,
was picked to spar couple of
rounds with George Abrams, a
professional boX-fighter who op-
poses Jimmy Jones at the Arena
next Monday night. AS say, 1
was picked, and the only time I've
ever had gloves on was to keep my
hands warm.
ChOWD NOES MILD
went to the Huron gym, over
on Eleventh Street, for the noble
experiment, and the minute I
stepped into the joint I knew I
had made a mistake. I breezed
a cherry hello, but I went over
with hush. I began to wonder
a little bit. After all, a reporter
who covers an execution doesn't
sit in the electric chair to describe
the reactions of the victim.
Goldie Ahearn looked particu-
larly happy, the lug.
Now" he said, rubbing his
hands just as he does when the
Arena is a sellout, we're gonna
get even for all them nasty
cracks you print in your paper"
Look, George" I said to
Abrams. didn't I always say
nice things about you? Take it
easy, but make it look good"
II don't know" Abrams said
doubtfully. "You got to go in
the water if you want to learn
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Harry Raskin and Gabe Menen-
dez, two Of our prominent fight
managers, dressed me for action.
Cowboy Howard Scott, who acted
as my second, loaned me his
trunks. The Cowboy has fought
Lou Ambers, lightweight cham
p1on, three times and has never
hit the dust.
NO SYMPATHY
I'm sort of superstitious
about those trunks" Scott said,
$50 don't go falling down."
AS I went into the ring, felt
like one of those guys who demon.
strate hair tonic in department
store window. If Goldie was Choir
Ting with glee before, he was
positively hilarious now. noticed
spy, Dick OBrien, of the Wash.
ington Herald, in the crowd. Dick
greeted me affectionately.
Hello, Boob" he said. I
guess he doesn't know how to
pronounce Bob.
Harry and Gabe warned me to
keep my left hand high. Sid
FiShel, Georges manager, stuck
piece of cotton in my mouth.
Just in case" The bell rang and
the next thing I knew was in a
SnoWstorm, only a lot Of leather
was coming down instead of
flakes.
I heard somebody yell to throw
that right" I threw it. I almost
knocked Raskin's false teeth out.
QUITE A DIFFERENCE
Scott was yelling something
about dancing around" but
never could do the shag. It's funny
when you're in there yourself. It's
easy to holler from a ringside to
throw a left hook to the body"
or shoot that straight right" but
it's q little different when you try
it. Maybe I should have given
Abrams a blueprint of my plans.
Every time started to throw a
right hand, he jabbed me out Of
| DC4UCA 4A4Ss
I remember trying to look very
tough, then somebody pulled the
floor out from under me. don't
know where he got it, or how he
had time to get it, but George hit
me with a baseball bat-right on
the chin-then he hit me in the
stomach with a brick. They tell
me I looked awfully silly going
down and that was laughing.
Yeah, some joke!
When I woke up, Goldie was
moaning about wishing he could
have a knockout like that on his
card. Raskin was rubbing my ears
and Gabe brought me back from
Dream Street by sticking a bottle
of ammonia under my Tapping
nose.
Didn't I tell you to keep that
left hand up?" Harry demanded.
81 had it up," I mumbled,
"but Abrams must been driving
against the lights"
I'm glad my boss hasn't got me
covering dog shows. Imagine me
barking with this sore throat I
have. How about the next dance,
nurse?
Clipper Smith to