Evening star., 1938-07-08
Mothers Job
.OfHandling
Relatives
Bringing Up Baby
Is Responsibility
OF Parent Only.
BY ANGELO PATRI.

WHEN the new baby arrives. mother
has done a double job. She has
to bring up the baby and the grown
members of the family at the same
time. Often it is easier to get along
with the baby than it is with the
others. Grandparents want to help,
and they are very sure that they know
more about the job than mother does.
Fond aunts and uncles are eager
to lend a hand. They are anxious to
see the child growing perfectly, and,
like the rest of US, they are inclined
to think that perfect growth would be
something in their own likeness. So
mother has to be diplomat, a parent
and stern guardian at the same time.
1t is during infancy that mother
has the best chance to establish her
place as the one in supreme authority.
She is the one to lay down the law.
In the early months a baby sleeps
most of the time. He is not to be
disturbed. Strangers are not to be
allowed in his room. Close members
of the family must stay at q distance.
They may look, but not touch. The
baby is not to be kissed. He Is not
to be tossed up on Uncle Dams shoul-
der. He Is not to be tickled by his
brother. his sisters or his aunts. He is
not to be rocked by anybody. and that
includes grandma. He is never to be
shaken or scolded or frightened. Any
one who is annoyed by the actions of
the baby must keep out of the way.
Sometimes among the relatives is
one who insists upon taking the place
Of the mother. Usually it is an elderly
relative who longs to bring up this
child in the right way, her way. When
this happens. there is only one thing
for mother to do, and this Is to say
politely, sweetly, firmly: Il am the
baby's mother. The responsibility is
mine. In the long run I must manage
with him alone as best I can. No,
I cannot let any one take my place."
Say something like this and mean it,
and that will end the interference.
Some of the friends and relatives
will want to give you advice about the
child's food. Tell them you do not
need their advice. You are following
the doctors orders about the child's
diet strictly and you don't want to
spoil his work and waste time and
money.
Some will offer gifts to the baby,
and mother must decide what is to
be done about that. Talk things over
with these friends who mean so well.
Let mother show them that the gifts
had better take the form of some last
ing benefit. such as an insurance for
the education of the child. Don't
shower money or useless gifts upon
children. They need very little. Just
food. clothes and toys-all of the SIM
plest kind. Enough is enough.
Grown-ups should never tease q
child. They should not order him
about. He is to look to one person
for direction, his mother. Later father
comes into the picture, but nobody else
is to say . word. Too many words
bring confusion and cause rebellion.
Protect the child from grown-ups,
who mean well, but do not UNDER
stand the situation. The child is the
mothers responsibility, and mother is
the first authority.
Mr.. Patri has prepared q leafiet
entitled, "Self-Measuring Chart"
which teaches q child how to ex-
anime himself and check up on ,,
his behavior. Send for it, address,
ing your request to Mr.. Angelo
Patri, Child Psychology Depart
ment Of this paper Inclose q self
addressed, stamped (3-cent) en-
velope.
Copyright. 1881
A Fruit Sauce.