Imperial Valley press., 1938-03-20

E&& &SS2SSs&Ss& W. &SMM eraS are all Sucll
c. b. DRISCOLL impossible things
from a realistic point Of view, adds
to the mood of relaxation. There's
nothing to figure out or match up.
You check your reason with your
hat
I like opera in company of some
one who knows more about it than
| do. but isn't a real, learned eX-
pert. Jake Omansky. DR.. Arthur
Malakoff. Barney Ruder, Arthur
Rudd, Dr. M. Jagendorf, and Nc
Nitt are ideal for me. because they
don't 'high-hat me about my lack
of musical knowledge.
l can't enter the time-Stained
Met without recalling my first night
there | was fresh from the grass.
I had bought myself one ticket.
As | entered. it was taken from me
by a man in tails and plug hat.
Now. the only men in our town who
diked themselves out that way were
Doctor Foriyce our family physi-
clan, and Doctor Schultz, who adj
Vertised in the papers that he could
renew youth with an alfalfa elixir.
But here the help dressed up for
Il funeral to go to work!
My seat-check in hand, l pro-
ceede1 to wander. afraid to ask
anybody where to go or what to
do Standing morosely III red
carpeted lobby was d medium sized
man with a moustache and silk hat.
Aha, another obliging employe! !
Usher, no doubt.
I handed him my check stub. He
glanced up, startled, gave me a cold
stare. showed the stub back into my
fist. Turned on his heel and fled.
l saw him open a door into a box,
duck in, and slam the door angrily.
On the door of the box was his
name. j. Pierpont Morgan. / inter
viewed him for United Press later,
and he was cold, hostile. I Won
dered whether he recognized me
as the country lad who had thought
him an usher.
The Fifth Avenue Association
doesn't permit window displays With
moving objects, demonstrators, live
animals. or mechanical gadgets that
run. The feeling is that such eX-
hibitS are somehow common, or
binary. or vulgar. Avenue merchants
want to keep their street from
going Coney Island, as Broadway
has gone. But the ban against Jig
lag exhibits will be lifted during
the Worlds Fair. The theory is
that visitors from Out There are
likely to be attracted wherever the
moving window displays are, and
Fifth avenue isn't going to pass up
this chance to get its share of the
business.
About o. o. M: Just once / ask
ed Odd for an autographed photo
graph for a good friend of mine in
California. He refused, apologeti-
cally. Il never give that to any
body who asks for it, he explained,
and never to a stranger. l think
an autographed photograph ought
to mean something very personal. y
I saw his point. Next day l receiv-
ed fine print of a sketch of Odd
by James Montgomery Flagg. In
the red ink handwriting: ITO Charlie
DriSccll, with the affectionate re
CARDS of his friend, o. o. Mcintyre.
have no sympathy with people
who belittle schoolteachers. Where
would America be without the self
less, hard working, intelligent WON
en- who teach our children? / would
still be making a bad job Of ploWing
corn if it were not for Miss Edith
Smith, who goaded and cajoled me
into taking a certain county eX-
animation.
Alexander Woollcott takes brandy
with his black coffee at nine am.
in pajamas . Variety is as much
an essential to actors as ice to polar
bears. If an actor is on relief, he
should be allowed what extra money
it takes to buy the journal that
makes life interesting for him g..
Today Ursula Parrott offered tC
give me a baby chow, TO prove that
elbows are not as bad as l have
painted them. What shall l do?
My daughter Pat says, please take
it." Captain Kidd looks worried.