Twin-City herald., 1938-10-01

Peliente, Texas, Buzzards and vul-
lures met here in an international con-
vocation to make more direct ex-
preston of interest in events that
hover over Europe today.
Receiving word Wednesday to the
effect that there was some possibility
of peace, the convention Immediately
went on record as decrying the effort,
and drew up resolutions to forward
Adolph Hitler. Embodied in the reso-
luton was statement to the effect
that inasmuch as America had settled
her economic problems peacefully
that because of the various relief acts,
horses and cattle are not dying with
sufficient frequency, and that Americas
peaceful influence was felt throughout
the world generally, they, themselves
had been thrown into the worst depres-
sion seen in one hundred and fifty
years.
One very old buzzard croaked the
fact that he had lived during the pros
porous period of the civil war, and had
also waxed prosperous during the yell
low fever plague in New Orleans and
Charleston, S. C., and conditions to-
day only served to make the memory
of those days vivid. A number of
trench rats who had come from Europe
to attend the convention as observers
gave an interesting afternoon to dis
cussions of experiences from 1914 to
1918.
One grey whiskered and grizzeled
member of the foreign delegation gave
discourse on his adventures after the
battles of the Somme, another boasted
he had operated both at Vimy Ridge
and Lys.
The Chairman was forced to settle
two arguments during the informal dis
cussions as to which of the continents
produced men with the best flavor.
One carried an insignia of the high
est order in trench rat circles and
boasted he had gained honor by lead
ing march near Verdun, in which
they crossed the faces of sleeping
troops with minimum of casualties.
To break the possible monotony of
the discourse, buzzard delegate who
had seen service during the dispute in
Gran Chaco told of the newer de- |
partures in preventing the beak from
coming in contact with buttons and
other metals while feasting.
A lengthy letter expressing highest
anticipation was read from the amalga-
mated order or seam workers, stating
that the constant war carried on by
science and other agencies of cleanli-
ness had made the life of the ordinary
louise miserable as well as deficient.
AS the letter reading was finished, |
one rat arose and presented credentials !
as special messenger to the conven-
ton from his own organization, and |
urged cooperation in a movement to
prevent troops carrying matches. He
claimed that during his sojurn at Sois-
sons soldier set a rat on fire, that
had disturbed his rest, and the odor~of
burnt rat fur made existence so un-
endurable that they were forced to
leave the trench. He added mourn
fully that they had been forced to leave
a spot that contained eating for days
and days.
Munitions makers and stock market
gamblers sent fluctuations to the con-
vention, and urged forceful action to
help bring better times to their various
kindred guilds who admit they can no
longer survive without further mis-
fortunes to humanity.
Word was also expected from dicta- ;
tors, group of shyster world polite I
ians, and others disgruntled with the
peaceful processes of democratic evolu-
ton, stating that they would lend their
assistance to give aid to the aims of
the brotherhood of buzzards. S