davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Imperial Valley press., 1938-03-16
THE POT CALLS
THE KETTLE BLACK
Minneapolis Tribuncl

Particularly active among satirical critics Of
Americas "journaleSe" language are the primly
proper BritiSherS. Not only is the contention
advanced that Americans misuse English in
daily speech. but particular pleasure is derived
from ridiculing familiar American usages, such
as those made common in the nations news
paper headlines.
On one of his recent visits to America the
English writer, H. G. Wells, took particular de-
light in holding up to Scorn the headlines he
saw before him in the nations metropolitan
press. He picked up New York newspaper at
the time, pointed to a heading and examined it
word by word: oyster Bars Jam Probe" All
the EngliShman found in the isolated sentence
was mixed reference to a molluSk. a CONNECTION
and a surgical instrument 1t developed. when he
sought explanation, that traffic official named
Oyster had prevented investigation of a motor
vehicle tie-up the city's streets.
1t must have been a retaliatory American
newspaper writer who brought back this gem,
copied verbatim from the sign which appears
over a wash basin in the British museum at Lon
don: "Stoppages having been caused in the
drainage through the pipes having been used in
order to dispose of miscellaneous objects it is
notified that the provision for public accommoda-
ton must be dependent on only proper use being
made of it."
Why all that ponderous yerbitage Johnny
Bull when all you mean is Don't clog the snk?"
Imperial Valley press., 1938-03-16
AT LEAST THE
VERDICT is AVOlDABLE

Another fatal automobile accident i'm
Imperial county has become a closed
incident with verdict by a coroner's
jury that it was an unavoidable acci-
dent"
Not an accident caused by defective
brakes, bad tires. weak steering mechan-
ism or careless driving-just an una
voidable accident"
The California Safety Council. if it
never did another thing. would complete
ly Justify its existence if it took those
two words-unavoidable accident = out
of the vocabulary of coroner's juries.
There is no such thing as an unavoid-
able accident, unless it is an act of God
and an act of God, TO the pious, cannot
be called an accident. There never was
an automobile accident that was not
avoidable. There never was any other
sort of an accident that was not avoid
able.
If two automobiles were travelling in
opposite directions between 20-foot high
concrete walls on highway II feet wide
at a speed of rs miles an hour and a
fatal accident occurred that accident
could be called unavoidable-but only.
if you took into consideration only the
last 800 yards of their progress towards
one another. Even such an accident
would be avoidabe if the drivers braked
their cars to stop before they reached
the danger point.
All of our So-called unavoidable acci-
dents are due to careless driving, faulty
mechanism, bad eyesight, weak tires,
dim or binding lights, or some other
preventable cause. So they are not un-
avoidable The thing which causes them
could be avoided.
Let's not hear any more about una
voidable accidents
Imperial Valley press., 1938-03-16
Other Editors Say
christian Science Monitor)

Not only Wall Street but the United States
in general is startled to read that the New York
Stock Exchange has preferred charges against
the firm of Richard Whitney and Company.
For Mr.. Whitney was the last president of the
New York Exchange under the old dispensation
prior to Federal regulation. He tried to resist
the popular clamor for regulatory act. When his
fight collapsed, new guard" in New York put
in the present president, Mr.. Charles R. Gay,
and Mr.. Whitney went back to his bond business.
Nobody outside the inner circle of the Ex-
change and the SEC knows the nature of the
charges preferred against Mr. Whitney. What
has been announced is merely the generazed
statement of the committee on business conduct
and the statement by which Mr.. Whitney has
taken sole responsibility for his firms difficulties
The committee says that on March l it discovered
evidence OF conduct apparently contrary to just
and equitable principles of trade" ie., stock
exchange business. A formal hearing is set for
March II, and then comment will be in order
The case, however, will strengthen the hands
of stock exchange reformers. For many months
past the SEC has insisted that the New York
institution should be reorganized in a manner
more befitting its public character. In the Whit
ney days it was more like a private club. And
though under the Gay administration many
changes have been made, they have not been
enough, nor has the tempo been fast enough
to please either the SEC or the general public
The Whitney failure comes in the nature of
seal upon what some Wall Streeters no doubt
call the good old days
Imperial Valley press., 1938-03-16
WHY NOT TAKE
ALL THE EVIDENCE?

1t was disappointing to the average
Imperial Valley resident when Examiner
V. p. Lucas of the National Labor Rela-
tions Board refused to call for physical
evidence of labor union meeting in Ell
Centre at which, according to union
executives, rank and file members voted
a strike on the Lewis Chambers Con-
struction company job The refusal
leaves open a very pertinent question:
did members of the union actually parti-
cipate in strike vote or was the strike
called by union organizers without
knowledge or permission of members?
1t seems to US that the NLRB cannot
hope to determine the true status of Lew
is-Chambers WOrkmen unless it does eX-
aine such evidence.
The labor relations board, We believe,
would be an agency of immeasurable
benefit if it would, in truth, investigate
and determine the actual facts of labor
disputes brought before it. Regardless
of whether the decision harmed the en-
ployer or the labOrer. No such decision
can be made, however, unless the board
is able to determine how many laborers
are represented by the disputing fac
ton, and whether the laborers themselves
raised the disputed point
As a result Of the examiners ruling
in the hearing here, no one but labor
union officials is ever apt to know wheth-
er the Lewis-Chambers strike was actu-
ally called by the union members them
selves, or by organizers attempting to
force further organization on that parti-
cular job.
No fair decision is ever based on owl
,dence which includes only one side of
the argument, or fails TO reveal even that
side completely.
Imperial Valley press., 1938-03-16
Bruce Carton Says
- Aue Means Insecurity for Office Workers

middle-aged is the tacb
that medical science has aooed
many years to the expectancy of
life. In 1850, persons between the
ages of 40 and GA made up ii per
cent of the population of the Unit
ed States, today they constitute
around 25 per cent. Estimates set
80 per cent for 1870. Thus while
melical advancement has brought
added years, the fact remains that
the longer life span also adds to
the problem of unemployment
among the middle-aged.
No one seems to have any real
solution. The remedy, when 1t
comes, will probably be the result
of many years trial and error. But
such revelations as these disclosed
by the New York survey are i'm
mensely important in bringing
home the full realization that the
problem of unemployment after 40
does not concern industrial work
ers alone. 1t concerns everybody.
And the sooner everybody becomes
aware of that fact, the sooner there
will be an answer to the problem.
Imperial Valley press., 1938-03-16
Well II
Tell You.
says
Bob Burns

dent think people are pruues
Jest because they like to have their
kinnSlks show up good. | know l
can't help bein' proud when some
Cf my kinfolks do or say things that
reflect credit on our family.
| have enc cousin that l always
thought would be born poet IL
the instinct could ever be brought
out in him. Not long ago, l drove
him down to a cliff Overlookin' the
ocean and sunset. l says It's al
ways beautiful like that this time
of day" says Don't it fill you
with sentimental thoughts about the
folks back homc?'
NV cousin says eyes, about this
time of day, Nav is out swillin' the
DigS"
Imperial Valley press., 1938-03-16
(Hayerhill, Mass, Gazette)

Among the conspicuous aspirants for the DEM
ocratic nomination to the Presidency in 1910 is
Paul V. McNutt former governor of Indiana
and high commissioner of the Philippines.
His boom is the noisiest and most colorfu
in the land today, despite his insistence that
he is not a candidate for any office and that
his chief interest is American-Philippine rela-
tions. His Indiana machine is working vigor-
ously and loudly for him and his pose of disin-
terest fools no one That machine does not
operate except under his direction.
So, no matter what he says he is a potential
candidate for the presidency
When we ponder on this fact we think of
the high and mighty McNutt who made an issue
for precedent when he went to the Philippines
by insisting that he be ranked ahead OF the
president Of the insular commonwealth and We
think of his efficient political machine in In
diana that is financed by collecting two per
cent of the pay of each employe of the state
And we shiVer bit at the thought of this
self-appointed big shot practising political pro-
fesSion all over the land.
Imperial Valley press., 1938-03-16
DALE
CARNEGIE
Author of How TO Win
Friends and Influence
People

Here's an idea for you, if you
ever hit a town, broke, and need
money in hurry.
One day in 1920. a young man
twenty years old arrived in San
Antonio. Texas, with less than a
dollar in his pocket. Yet in two
days he earned honestly, and thru
his own skill, almost a thousand
dollars Doesn't seem possible, does
it? This young man was named
Billy Rose. Here is how he did it:
The Republican party of Texas
was holding a state convention IN
San Antonio. 1t blew up in grand
scrap. which was followed by a
red-hot open air convention of the
Negroes Billy Rose. who was the
shorthand champion of the world,
got out his notebook, took down
the speeches of the Wild-cyed color
ed orators, typed them and sold
copies to the orators themselves
and to their friends. He found
when he reached his hotel that
night. that he had more than
eight hundred dollars.
Lucky, wasn't he? But was it
wholly luck?
Billy Rose was equipped for that
occasion with an extraordinary ac-
complishment that he had acquir-
ed by determination. driving force,
and long and arduous training, He
could record accurately the words
OF the fastest speakers, using both
hands at once. How did he ac-
quire this ability that enabled him
to earn this large sum so quickly?
He says he did it, to a large eX-
tent. in his spare time"
This experience gave Billy Rose
confidence. Since then he has been
successful as a song writer, night
club proprietor, and a Snowman on
a colossal scale. He is sometimes
called the successor to Barnum.
Watch those idle hours of yours
Rightly filled, they may put you
into a Rolls Royce
My first job after leaving col
lege was travelling for Armour and
Company out in South Dakota
Since I travelled over the same
territory week after week, I became
quite friendly with the train con-
ductors. In my luggage case l car
ried only the articles that I felt
were absolutely necessary. One day
one of the conductors jokingly put
a rock into my suit case; and
carried it around for weeks before
I discovered it. That taught me q
lesson I realized then that | was
carrying around with me a lot oil
things that I never used. That is
bad enough when it comes to lug
gage. but a lot of us are carrying
around in our minds and hearts
old hates and regrets and memo
rieS of failures. It's a good plan
to empty your travelling bag occa-
sionally and clean out all useless
trumpery; and its a good plan tC
do the same thing with your mind
DR.. John Harvey Kellogg. thf
founder of the famous Battle
Greek Sanitarium, never had any
children of his own. but he reared
fOrty-tWo orphan children. He tolc
me that was one of the most gra.
tifying memories of his life.
Think of it! Actually promoting
the welfare and happiness o
forty-tWo persons.
Imperial Valley press., 1938-03-16
Photographs

Minerals produced from Alaskan
mines in 1897 had an estimated
value Of S27,440000. This brings
the total mineral production from
Alaska since 1880 10 $750,OOO 900
The United States purchased the
I, rrilory from Russia IN 1867 for
81. 200 900.
Imperial Valley press., 1938-03-16
Barbs ..-

Austrian politics may be in
dizzy whirl, but hardly as the re-
suit if the Waltzes for which Wen
ma famous.
The latest Tales of the Vienna
Woods come from Nazi composers
who think they have Austria up
tree.
Coach favors only one handed
basketball shots. Graud for me
game. or grandstand for the
players2
Imperial Valley press., 1938-03-16

put to bed I used
to 60 there with
Harold Calendar,
telegraph editor.
We'd talk about
tew York and
London till the
first m orn i n G
trolley car ratified
up to take us
home. Harold is
London man for
the New York
Times now. An
derSon S e rv e d
Imperial Valley press., 1938-03-16
Famous Sayings

There have been many evidences
within the past few years that
America gradually is arriving at
full realization of the problems
which the age of machines Gre
ateS for the industrial worker past
the age of 40. Now comes news of
a survey conducted by the New
York State League of Economics
showing a marked trend toward the
employment Of younger men and
women for the white collar jobs
as well as for skilled and unSkilled
labor.
The fact that the survey set the
maximum age for hiring of white
collar workers at 35 years-the
same at the average for all in
duStries and businesses convassed
would indicate further that the Of
flee workers must wake up to the
obvious fact that employers want
younger men.
Office workers must realize just
where they stand in the matter of
hiring and firing, that they arc not
a group apart, privileged to job Sc
curity because they work in a nice
clean office with their brains and
not in a greasy shop with their
hands. The objections that employ
crs list against the hiring of Ia
borers of advanced years-poor
physical risk, decreased productive
ty, slowing up and inability to meet
change-alSo hold for clerks, book
keepers and even men of profess
Sional ranking.
Assuming that an employer has
no prejudice against hiring men
past 40 that he believes an alert
middle-aged man may be more
capable and more productive than
a more active man 20 years his ju-
nior. there remain several outside
factors working against the older
men. For example, most private
pension systems penalize their en-
ployment. Such pensions can be
justified only after man has
worked 25 to 80 years Thus man
hired at the age of 45 and retired
a IS will have contributed less to
the cost of maintaining his pension
than will a man hired at 25 and
penSioned at 65.
Group insurance presents a SIM
liar difficulty. Premium rates go
up rapidly as the age of the en-
ploye increases. Here again it is
more costly for the employer to
hire older men, other considera-
tions being equal.
Aggravating the problem if the
Imperial Valley press., 1938-03-16
New York
Day by Day
BY Charles B. Drisc0ll

NEW YORK. Mar. l6.-Walt An
derSon ran a chilli and hamburger
stand. as big as your handkerchief,
i'm orr town. After the paper was
Imperial Valley press., 1938-03-16
News Behind
the News
The Liberty League
But Not Forgotten
Rv RODNEY BUTCHER

WASHINGTON. - Despite pro-
fessed assurance of the navy ad-
mirals and their dear friend Presi-
dent Roosevelt as to the superiority
of battleships over airplanes as a
defense weapon, naval officers know
perfectly we'll that it will take a
real war to decide the argument.
Both the navy and the army have
secret reports and surveys from
which anyone privy to them could
prove practically anything. The
army thinks the battleship is more
vulnerable to aerial attack than the
navy does, but even the navy men
are forced to admit privately that
no one can tell how successfully
modern bombing planes can operate
against modern battleships until
they are set against each other in
the next war"
Anti-aircraft guns of ships can
hit a plane now almost as easily
as a gunner in a plane can hit a
ship Confidential reports in the
Navy Department venture the guess
that in any major aerial engage
ment in which both battleShlpS ana
planes figured, about two-thirds of
the flyers on both sides would be
killed.
The army thinks a battleship or
other object should be bombed
from a plane flying horizontally
and has developed bombs which
function that way. It's the safest
method. But the navy sticks to
the old theory of diving its planes
at a .battleship. The increasing
thunder Of a diving plane loaded
with bombs is likely to unnerve
anti-aircraft gunners, even though
a closer target is offered them.
Battleships make tough targets
because their decks are so heavily
armored, whereas cruisers are easy
prey for aerial bombs. Conclusion
from bombs dropped alongside a
battleship, it's agreed, is much
greater hazard than the likely effect
of a direct hit.
Imperial Valley press., 1938-03-16
Thoughts for the Day

Therefore I say unto you What things soever yc
desire when We pray. believe that yc receive them
and ye shall have thcm-Mark ll:24
Imperial Valley press., 1938-03-16

Dale Carnegie or Charles B. Driscoll? This
newspaper can keep only one of these columns
Our readers will determine which it is to be. Cast
your vote clip this ballot and mail or bring it to
the Post-Press office.
like best:
Dale Carnegie u
Charles B. Driscoll ,,.--,-.--.-...-...-.--.
Name & Address (Optiona) ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS.
Imperial Valley press., 1938-03-16
One Minute Test Answers

l. DR.. II. H. Kung.
:; Approximately onethird. or
less.
3. Rights of the owner Of land
containing water or bordering ON q
water course.
Imperial Valley press., 1938-03-16

Nearly half the relief cases Of an lii
nois town receive aid through fraud. So
that's how the other half lives?
New York congressman wants to raise
$7,000,000 by taxing radio. He's convinc-
ed there's something in the air.
Imperial Valley press., 1938-03-16

Soviet scientists have invented a
parachute which opens automat
ically as soon as the Wearer leaps
from an airplanc.
Imperial Valley press., 1938-03-16

Smoking in subway stations in
creases. 1t is as dangerous as target
practice in a dynamite factory.
Sorry, Mr.. Mayor; afraid well have
to have real cops in the subWays.
Imperial Valley press., 1938-03-16

U. s. wild life scientists report
that summer hand feeding Of park
deer often results in their loss Of
the ability to find forage during
winter months
Imperial Valley press., 1938-03-16

March, 1888, brings the tenth,
anniversary of Boston-NeW York
passenger flying service.
Imperial Valley press., 1938-03-16
Hints on Etiquette

The woman who is staying alone
at hotel should entertain visitors
in the hotel drawing rooms.
Imperial Valley press., 1938-03-16
The Grab Bag
One MinmIe Ted

l. Who is premier of China?
2. What proportion Of the in
habitapts Of CzechoslOvakia arc
Germans?
3. What are riparian rights?
Imperial Valley press., 1938-03-16
Words of Wisdom

Conversation enriches the under
standing, but solitude is the school
CT genius.
Imperial Valley press., 1938-03-16

Today's Horoscope
Good business sense is possessed
by many persons whose birthday
occurs today. They sometimes
make unusually wise investments.
The Washington times., 1938-03-21
TEN-P|N CHAMPS
DEFEND TITLES

CHICAGO, March 81 G.N.sO.
American bowling champions sell
dom repeat but Make Stein, Belle
vile, ILL.,, and Nelson Burton, Dal-
las, Texas, two 1927 title holders,
will attempt it today.
Stein totaled 619 with the
Mystery Men, st. Louis, last
night as they were taking first
place with 3,035 on games of 234,
1877, 1873. His mystery team clicked
with games of 1,042, 1855 and
937. Stein won the all-events last
year with a 2,070 score.
Burton won the doubles title
last year, with Virgil Gibbs, Kan
sas City, in a rollicking 1859 blast,
and will double with st. Louis
Ray Newton in the twin event late
in the day.
When the Mystery Men opened
with games of 1,042 and 1,056,
they needed a count of 1,102 to
better the 3,199 all-time high,
scored by the Milwaukee Tea
Shops at Peoria in 1927. But they
felt the pressure and looked like
one of the booster squads in the
final frames. Splits and errors
cost them at least 100 pins in the
last frames.
The Washington times., 1938-03-21
ST.JOHN'S five
TOURNEY BOUND

st. Johns Prep School departed
this morning for Pittsburgh, the
first lap of the journey which will
take the Washington scholastic
basketball champions to Chicago,
where Wednesday it will compete
in the National Catholic Scholas,
tic Basketball Tournament under
the sponsorship Of Loyola Uni.
versity.
Accompanying the Cadet quin.
tet on the trip westward is Cal
vert Hall of Baltimore, which will
scrimmage the Johnnies in Pitts.
burgh late today. Following a
layover in Smoketown tonight,
both teams will leave for Chicago
early tomorrow morning and ar
rive in the Windy city tomorrow
evening.
The Washington times., 1938-03-21
Eastern Matmen
Peril MONOPOLY

STATE COLLEGE, Pa, March
21.-Eastern college wrestlers, who
have bowed to rugged sons of the
West for many years, will strive to
break the western monopoly here
this week in the eleventh annual
National Collegiate tournament.
At least, the eastern grapplers
have never before entered the N.
C. A. A. tourney in such numbers.
Among the early entries were six
of the eight champions of the East
ern intercollegiate tournament.
The two missing title holders are
expected to file late applications.
The Washington times., 1938-03-21
New Punch Will Beat
Louis, Says Thomas

CHICAGO, March 21.-Harry
Thomas believes that following
his fight with Joe Louis, heavy
weight champion of the world
here Friday night. he will be
the new titlehloder, because of
the new punch he has de,
veloped. :.
Thomas showing in recent
workouts has captured the fancy
of his manager, Nate Lewis, who.
has predicted that the slugging
blonde-haired engineer has de-
veloped this new punch that is
filled with dynamite.
Thomas always could hit, and
he is hitting even better today.
Anyone is dangerous when he
has a hard punch" said Lewis.
Thomas is scheduled to work
out at Trafton gym today, while
Champion Joe Louis rests. The
two fighters alternate in using
the gym.
The Washington times., 1938-03-21
Royal Mail Favored
In Grand Nutiondl

LONDON, March 21.-Royal
Mail, winner Of the Grand Ma
tional Steeplechase last year, is
selected to duplicate his feat Fri
day when the 101st running of
the event is staged at Aintree on
the outskirts of Liverpool.
Royal Mail is a 100-to-7 shot,
and heavy favorite to capture
the race over a field of 80
thoroughbredS.
Forty final acceptances were
received at the last call this
week and one of these has since
dropped out because of an in
jured foreleg. He is Santa Luz,
an outsider.
Five American.owned horses
are set for the barrier for the
The Washington times., 1938-03-21
Ranger Star Ends
11-Year Career

DETROIT, March 81 Q.N.s0.
Larry Aurie, Red Wing star for II
years, today hung up his hockey
togs for good after aiding his team.
mates score 4-3 win last night
over the New York Rangers IN q
National League hockey contest.
He did not have any scores or
assists to his credit but he drew
the crowd to its feet with his bril-.
liant checking.
The game was speeded up with
the innovation of the rule that the
puck carrier Is at no time off side.