Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1938-11-26
From the
PRESS Box
SoIons at Service Tilt
Find Cadets Still Tall
BY JOHN LARDNER,

PHILADELPHIA, Nov. 26.-The
United States Congress looked for
ward to today's ArmyNavy game
with no little bitterness, because,
what with Republican gains in both
Houses last Election Day and log
rolling, fllibustering, and red tape,
the boys in the West Point Cadet
Corps are just as tall as ever.
The best Democratic minds in
Congress have been agitating for
shorter soldiers since last year,
when the Cadets kept standing up
In front of the Congressman ana
blocking their view of the ball field.
One legislator suggested that the
boys stay home during the Navy
game and give the peoples choice a
fair chance to see what the quarter
back was up to. You cannot Sec
ond-guess a quarterback unless you
can see him, and, for all they knew
in Washington, the Army and Navy
Quarterbacks were kicking on second
down, passing in their own territory,
and getting away with murder gen.
orally.
Scouts for the Dies Committee
strongly suspected that Fascism was
rampant out there between the 40
yard lines, but they had no way of
telling until the Cadets sat down,
which the Cadets never did. Rumor
had it that matters were just as bad
on the Navy side of the field.
Shorter Soldiers or Teller
Congressman Is Question
When West Point declined to
keep her future generals at home
this year, Congress was forced TO
consider legislation. There were two
possibilities:
(a) Shorter soldiers.
90 Taller congressman.
A straw vote showed that both
Houses were opposed relentleshly to
changing the size and content OF
their own members, which left them
with nothing to do but pass a law
reducing the overall specifications
of the young fellows at West Point
The Compact Cannon Fodder Bill,
calling for vest-pocket Cadets, was
nearly on the point of passage, as
I understand it, when this months
elections swept a handful of hag-
Cling Republicans into Office. Nat
urally, the Republicans are just as
anxious to see the ball game as the
Democrats, and if they had thought
of it first, they undoubtedly would
be bowling up and down the Capt.
tol corridors for smaller and snugger
soldiers, but circumstances COM
PEELED them to vote the bill down.
Thus, the Democrats are left alone
with their plea for infinitesimal in
fantry. They have thought of sew
eral ways of achieving the goal, the
most practical of which is to change
the West Point requirements. No
candidate measuring more than S
feet would be admitted to Army
under the new program. Smoking,
which is said to stunt the growth,
would be encouraged. In fact, there
Is an ugly report in circulation that
certain + congressman have been
bombarding the cadet corps with
cheap cigars, calculated to give the
servants of the people better look
at the football game.
Middies Dumb, but Powerful
Enough to Win, Says Critic
congressman, with first choice Of
tickets. get them on the 50-yard
line, and, by a f1endish coincidence,
that also is where the cadets sit
Last year, according to angry COM
plants in Washington, whenever the
action on the field became warm the
future generals rose as one future
general and cut the congressman
behind them clearly out of the play.
Several statesmen left the joint in
4 huff along about the end of the
third period. Others cussed warmly
and resolved to vote against in
creased armament. It seemed to
them there were too many troops in
the country already, all of them Z
feet high.
That is the way matters stand
today and, unless the legislators
bring periscopes along with their
hip TASKS or sit behind the goal
posts like lowly ticket buyers, this
years game will be as invisible as
last years.
Invisible or not, I have a gently
stirring bunch that the underdog
will win. The underdog is Navy,
with team constructed along famil-
lar Navy lines-strong but dumb.
Watching Emmett Wood, a really
fine running back, charge behind
the tough and vigorous Navy line,
you would be surprised to hear that
this team finds scoring difficult and
that it has won only one major
game.
That's what the record says. But
there is one thing which can ami
mate and mobilize even heavy
headed football club, and that is
the drive and inspiration which the
Army game brings out in Navy.
Army Is smoother and smarter.
Navy is stronger and more durable.
Keep your eyes peeled for an upset,
unless you are Congressman, in
which case you will not see it even
when it happens.