Askov American. [volume] (Askov, Pine County, Minn.) 1914-current, 1938-10-27
l Would Say
BY A. w. CONAWAY

has been going in the wrong direc-
ton ever since Columbus attempted
to sail east by sailing west. He
caused Queen Isabella of Spain to
pawn her jewels to stake him on the
trip and women, ever since, have
been pawning jewels to stake wrong
way trips of their husbands.
Everything, however, went along
smoothly after Columbus landed here
until King George III Sounds funny
that King George should be in on
Queen Isabella'S investment, but
some one else always gets the bene-
fit of our labors, it seems-the good
old American way) began handling
the colonists wrongly and our an
cestors resorted to the wrong way
to settle disputes and won our indie
pendence that was for the time
being, of course, until the Repub-
licans got into power.
Then we went along serenely until
in 1917 our soldiers were headed
the wrong way and landed in France.
Instead of staying here where Column
bus put us, some became homesick
for the old country and went over
there to fight Now, during the past
20 years time has healed some of the
wounds in human beings and things
gradually had reverted to normal
until Douglas Corrigan attempted to
fly home to California after a short
sojourn in New York and instead
landed in Ireland.
By golly, though, that wrong way
of doing things has its good points
first of all Columbus went against
popular opinion, attempted to sail
east by sailing west and wound up
by discovering America; then later
we grabbed our guns which was the
wrong way of settling our contro-
VERSES, and won our independence
from England Now, by gum, Cor
rigan flies over to Ireland when he
meant to 60 to California and comes
home to honor and riches where he
can tell us what cigarettes to smoke
and which face powder is the best.
The roadside Identification project,
which Pine county'S federated clubs
are sponsoring, is a worthy under
taking and worth the support of all
beauty lovers. Pictures and photos
are in their place in living rooms
and parlors of the happy American
home, but out of their element along
the highways where the motorists
want to see the countryside. Then
too, public sentiment is getting against
them and those who would benefit by
them may find themselves paying the
bill without any appreciable results.
Did you ever stand outside circus
ballyhooer's tent and attempt to see
the interesting performance taking
place on the platform, while at the
same time several women wearing
sailor hats and tall men with broad
shoulders were getting look at it
in front of you? Well, anyway, that's
how disgusting road signs and bill
boards are becoming. People who
drive the highways of our state
wish to see all they can of the seem
cry and we want them to see it, too.
We have a two-faced countryside
let's take down the bill boards
and let the tourists see the other one.
Furthermore, natural formations OF
stones along the highway is no place
for political advertisements. Why
shucks, that way of campaigning does
not get nearly as much audience as
does calling up a friend on a party
telephone line.
A news item tells us that "Fog
Blacks Out London" and it enlarges
upon the situation to the extent of
telling that it caused darkness so thick
that dogs lost their way; train left
its brakeman who did not see it slide
away in the murkiness; and fog flares
were lighthouses for coughing Lon
doners who rubbed singing eyes as
chimneys by the millions poured a
barrage of smoke and SCOT into the
city's twisted streets.
That condition is bad but I Won
der what the Londoners think of our
foggy situation here whenever cam
paign time nears; when dogs stay in
hiding under door steps; trains slide
away into blackness of despair
without passengers; and when the
radio is lighthouse for gullible and
cropping voters.
You know, l heard three fellows
reputedly learned ones-argue over
the air waves the other night as to
their varied versions for solving the
nations problems. They had the
same effect on me that one old darky's