Worcester Democrat and the ledger-enterprise., 1938-12-02
''Chirps" ~
from the
Democrats Pen

vi, Il
our steamed contemporary, 1.-THE
Marylander-Herald" of Princess Anne
this city being located in Somerset
County, Maryland, that a man was
once elected to office in said county
by a majority of 200, more or less.
and that he never knew he was elect
cd, and, therefore, was deprived of the
pleasure and emoluments of holding
down the job.
To say the least, that sounds lit
tie "quair', don't it? But the paper
referred to says if you will send
stamped and self-addressed envelope,
Il will produce the proof thereof, so
that every doubling Thomas shall be-
Heve, even to the uttermost.
I amt doubtin' anything when it
comes to the manipulation of ballots
and ballot-boxes. There's lot of
sleight-of- hand performance connected
with them, where the hand is slicker
than the eye. And I'm right here to
say that if the "M and H" had re-
counted story which told of candi-
dates being defeated by 200 votes,
more or less; that this candidate didn't
know anything about that, and had
slipped unconsciously into all the
rights, privileges, and prerogatives
Of said office, I would sooner have
lent it credence. Wouldn't you? But,
after all, it's pretty hard to cover up
200 votes either way. still it might be
done. Magic's a great thing.
once read story, or saw it in a
comic strip, maybe Orphan Annie,
where a street magician thought he
would mystify pedestrian by pulling
q rabbit out of his vest pocket. But
he woke up the wrong passenger. The
intended victim took off the magi- |
clans hat and extracted therefrom, a
baby elephant. The would-be magician
fell dead. So if baby elephant could
be concealed up a mans sleeve, 200
votes is child's play.
So, Brother Byrd, think it's up to
you to "splanify" yourself, pro bono
publico; so that, more care should be
taken in future balloting. Of course
the man of your story might have
dropped dead before he received his
commission. If that be the case, you
should have said so right off the bat,
and prevented all this hard feeling.
Every man who ever ran for office
In Somerset, will believe he was the
man cheated out of his political de-
serts, and the schism in Somerset will
be wider and deeper than ever. Bet
ter turn on the light, Brother.
And speaking of elections, 10 Ser
N, in his "Low Down from Hickory
Grove" gives his impressions as to
che result of the election on November
9Th. He seems to find encouragement
In the signs of the times, and attrib-
Utes these to the way things went this
Fall. He says:
Since November eighth, business
she has seemed to be taking just
little more interest in life, and
the family, which has been hover
ing at the bedside, it has a min
ute's time now to run out for
sandwich.
Business, it is like a person,
whole lot. You go and pick up
the smallpox or something, and
your temperature which is o. X.
at SO, scoots up to 102, and you
are flat on your back. And it
does not seem like A degrees is
much, but boy, it sure removes
your appetite for ham and eggs
or corn cakes, etc. And with bust
ness, it is not an iota different
1t can be sick too.
You take a blacksmith and let
him mess around with your liver
or appendix, and he is not going
to do you much good. And the
boys who have been humping and
saving around on business, they
have put business in bed, too.
But these fiX-everything fellows,
they were whitfield down quite a
speck, on November Sth; and bust
ness, it has quite n bit more
sparkle in its eye already. No
vember Sth, it was quite n dav.
How-som-ever, in these days when
all your 1888 grocery and other mer-
chandise bills hav'n't much more time
in which to be settled; when taxes,
insurance come due; and light and
water bills have to be deprived of all
arrearages; when the coal bin in your
cellar looks like caved-in quarry
and expenses seem to delight in jump
lowdown or not. Still, I don't know
know whether my old "Chump" Joe
Sierra has the up-and-coming on the
lowdown or not. till, I don't know
that it does any good to be pessimis-
tic; better take the world as we find
Il, and let the worst of it go by.
But, I believe, if Brother Byrd will