Evening star., 1937-08-28

w iiilil tiidI lilt uOOI ildU no auJO-
matte catch, needed to be locked with
a key just like the doors inside the
house. 1t also struck him that fol
IA years he had been sticking a key
in the keyhole, turning the knob ano
letting himself into a house tina,
wasn't locked in the first place.
Thinking back over the possibilities
Of lnnumerable robberies that might
have been facilitated by that door, the
Baumeisters recalled that only once
in the IA years had their house beer
molested. That was by burglar who
must have spent at least half an hour
jimmying a locked window.
\ X X
ALIBI.
When employees of the Depart-
r1ent OF the Interior are late to
1oork. they are required to submit
directly to Secretary Ickes ,prit-
ten statement OF the reason for
said tardiness. A young man uho
1Dds ,Doetully late one morning re-
Gently set about this duty OF er-
planation NTH Uhat Ue regard as
a certain fair. He gaze as his
eTcuse:
'Misappr as to- time"
X
SORCERY.
ONE of our friends at the Depart
ment of Justice who likes to poke
around among dusty legal tones re-
Gently came across this old English
statute, which We offer without COM
ment, being afraid to say a thing. The
law was passed by Parliament in 100
and says:
That all women of whatever age,
rank, profession or degree, that shall
from and after such act impose upon,
seduce and betray into matrimony any
of His Majesty's subjects by means
Of scent, paints, cosmetic washes, arti-
fetal teeth, false hair, Spanish wool,
iron stays, hoops. high-heeled shoes or
bolstered hips, shall incur the penalty
Of law now in force against witch
craft and like misdemeanors, and that
the marriage upon such conviction
shall stand null and void
FARM.
A LITTLE tea room just opposite
the Federal Housing Administra-
ton and hard by the National Labor
Relations Board Offices has a pocket
size front lawn. A customer going in
for lunch the other day noticed some
vines growing in this two-by-four gar
den and, being something of farmer
cite herself, stopped to examine them.
They were cantaloupe vines.
BIG BUSINESS.
A SIDE to the Securities Exchange
Commission: Was it by your or
der, or did the gentlemen think it up
themselves? We mean that law now
reported to- be in effect on the New
York Stock Exchange, making it a
$50 fine to fill members pocket with
water. J.
Understand the statute was passed
to stop the more playful citizens from
going about shooting water pistols into
one another's pockets during dull trad
ing hours.
MISSING.
Standing at Ninth street and
Washington dripe the other dav
Uas q perplered tellow who was
almost wringtno his hands as he
matched Dreckers at work on one
OF the old Temporary" Gopern-
nent buildings.
Euery time some one passed bv
he'd ask in pleading tones, please,
can you tell me vhat they've done
ptth the Bureau OF Animal Hus-
bandry7 Here came down to see
it about some business, and find
man inside NTH steam shouel!r'
fSorry. We don't knoW ourselves,
but it's probably around town
sonaeUhere.)
X
SILENCER.
FOR this We'll probably be accused
Of trying to sell something, but
the story involves tip given us by
a grandmother, and we never pass up
tips from Observation-Disclosures on
horse races, fights, weather, books
or remedies for the megrims.
The tip should be joyfully received
Y .::ss< :: <HHo0M