Evening star., 1937-11-24

TN NO other place in the world Is
there such a great and crying need
for diplomacy as in the home,
4 and nowhere else Is so little Of 1t
used. We handle strangers and casual
acquaintance with gloves. We rub
the fur Of those with whom we have
business contacts the righ way, but
we waste no finesse in dealing with
the members of our own households.
We 20 at them with bare knuckles,
though why we should be more careful
of the feelings Of people we care
nothing about than we are of those
we love must forever remain one Of the
insoluble secrets of the human heart.
It is just one Of those things. We
disdain to use any tact in dealing with
our families, yet there is not one OF
us who does not know that the use of
even a modicum of diplomacy would
prevent 9 divorces out of 10 and
make the unmanageable children
over whom We agonize eat out of our
hands. All that is needed to make
the domestic machinery run smoothly
Is to keep it fabricated with plenty of
soft soap.
Consider for moment the difference
between marriage that is bit of
paradise and one that is a hell on
earth. 1t isn't matter of money,
social position, good looks, brilliance
or>even the kind of man and woman
the husband and wife are. 1t depends
entirely on how they treat each other
and whether they make a home that
is a place of peace and rest or one
that is scene of perpetual strife and
quarreling. A successful marriage Is
| invariably the result Of husband and
wife using diplomacy in dealing with
each other.
| THERE never was family spat that
couldn't have been stopped by the
| soft answer that turneth away wrath,
| or that couldn't have been prevented
| in the first place by little tact in
| keeping the topics that always precipl-
tate a row off of the carpet.
But instead Of doing this, the great
| majority of married people go out OF
| their way to start acrimonious argu-
| ments or drag into the conversation
| by the hair of the head each other S
| families or religion or politics that
| they know are the fighting word to
the other. Then they wonder why
| they are always sore at each other and
fail to get the happiness and COM
panionship they expected out of
marriage.
Why We feel that it is not incumbent
upon us to show the same considera-
ton for the vanity and susceptibility
of our families that we show to out
siders, no one knows. We would not
dream of insulting strangers by telling
them to their faces just what we
thought of their taste and judgment
and conversational abilities We
would not tell Mrs Jones that she was
getting fat and that she should not
be such a heavy eater. Nor would we
tell Mrs. Smith that her new hat was
10 years too young for her and make
her look like figure of fun MOI
when Mr.. Brown started on his pc
story. would We remind him that W,
had heard it hundred times before
But We show no such tact in deal.
ing with our own. Husbands dc
not hesitate to remind their wives
that they are getting old and losing
their looks. Wives cape in the midst
Of their husbands best jokes and mur.
mur, "Oh, stop" BY the time sister
has run the gamut of family inspec.
ton and heard its comments on hel
new gown, she is ready to throw it il
the ash barrel. Not without reason dt
We call the most merciless critics tt