Evening star., 1937-04-16

|
that might bite her mother. eve are
the first to admit that there was some
muddy thinking evident throughout
this incident.)
She put the oysters in sack, went
out in front of the house, and leaning
forlornly against a tree, began &C
costing passersby with the pitiful
plant wouldn't you like to take a
dozen oysters home with you, please?"
The citizens who came along either
regarded her with the nervous en-
barrassment Of persons being stopped
by an unwelcome peddler, or else just
plain ran away. certain that she was
trying to give them a bomb or some
thing.
After noting no signs Of luck for q
long time, the girl hit upon an idea,
stopped taxi and when the driver
opened the door, said, How would
you like a dozen oysters?"
Little girl, who sent you out to sell
those things at this hour Of the night?"
said the taxi driver grufiy. 60
home" He drove away.
She tried yet another cab. This
time the driver just looked at her like
panicky rabbit, shot the car in gear
and roared away, almost upsetting our
heroine.
Seeing that reason would do no
good in this crisis, she changed her
tactics with the next hacker. When he
opened the door, she quickly threw the
oyster sack into the back end OF the
car. screamed "Oysters!l Eat 'em!!'
and fed into the night.
|
THRIFT.
All societies, clubs and oroanizd-
tions for the prevention OF waste
please note the example set by the
officers OF No. precinct, this city.
They use confscated numbers"
pads for telephone memoranda.
MIFTED.
DROLETARIANS should appreciate
this little essay, maybe, because
it involves a Virginia gentleman who
owns two limousines. A few days ago,
after imbibing to the extent Virginia
gentleman shouldn't, he risked break
ing thumb or something by attempt
ing to affix the new license plates on
his fleet.
1t so happened that one set of tags
had the final figures 98, the other 99
Armed with a screwdriver, the pluto
crat went to the garage, unwrapped
the tags and probably shuff1ed them q
couple of times before going to work
Next scene is after dark. The fellow
is out driving, and without lights on
his car. An officer stops him. Busi-
ness of reading the registration card
This card doesn't belong with this
car" says the policeman, standing with
one foot on the rear bumper.
The Virginian, wandering around to
the front to look his machine in the
eye, takes the card, compares the tag
numbers thereon with the tag before
him.
Does too" says he. Much argu-
ment. Final discovery that both are
right. Except that the law won, Of
course. The fellow was arrested for
driving without lights.
| X X X
SHIFT.
LONE Of the most impressive turn
abouts in history has been achieved
by the catalogues of those Middle
western mail order houses. In the
last few years they have shifted from
the status Of crude joke material to
an almost social dignity. The Satur-
day Review Of Literature, for example
in a recent issue ran a page and one
half review Of the latest volume put
out by Chicago house, and we hea,
rumors that the Library of Congress
Is seeking a complete file OF the vol
umes.
| x X X
SHRIFT.
Boy and girl were strolling
along fashionable residential
street, sap several lin1ousines stop
ping in front OF a handsome house.
"Oh, n.y." said the girl Disttully,
somebody hauing louely party
and De're not inpited"
Il ,0onldn't like to 90 to a party
Dhere they haze that kind of
foDers,". said the boy. "And be-
sides, Dhat ,pould you pear,
shroud?"
The girl looked at her companion
as it she expected to fnd him sud-
denly den,ented, then tolloUed his
gaze to the door.
There she sdD a funeral ,uredth,
tied NTH creme