The Washington times., 1937-11-19

- UCCh Cn4uh1hS ONSA IAO ON
opinion is a tragedy.
I think it is a tragedy when your
roommate from college, one Of the
decentest fellows you've ever
known, decides to marry your sis
. ter who has red hair and nasty
temper. And the worst Of it is
you've brought it all about your
, self.
It began when wrote Martha
the following letter:
Dear Sis:
This is to let you know I'm
bringing friend, one Hank Rawl'
ings, down the weekend of your
dance. You will probably fall for
him, practically every girl does
but let me warn you, it won't do
you one bit of good. He doesn't
think much of women, particularly
debs.
Hes somehow got the idea that
you're about 10 years old, probably
because I sometimes repeat some
remark you've made. I haven't
put him wise because if he knew
there was going to be dance, etc.,
he probably wouldn't come -"
I expected Martha to be an
noyed, which is why I wrote it,
but it apparently drove her into
such a frenzy that she cried aloud
for Hanks and my blood. Martha
is rather young to have such
thirst for revenge, only 10, and
very tiny.
st have on my buerau a snap
shot of her in tennis shorts with
her hair in the female equivalent
to a crew cut, in which she looks
about 10. That's probably where
Hank got his impression Of her
age, and the fact that I've spoken
of her as my little sister.
A couple of days after I wrote
/. this letter, Hank came into our
room with a fair-sized box.
whats that?" said hopefully,
thinking it might be liquor.
Hank opened the box without a
word and took out, of all things, a
doll. "It says Mama" he said
proudly, making it say so.
"You goon!" I said, whats the
Idea?"
BUYS PRESENT
"It's a present for your sister,"
he said, think she'll like it?"
Hank is a huge owl, about six
four and in proportion, so the
sight of him with Mama doll
on his knee was pretty funny. I
should have explained to him then
and there that Martha was nine
cen and a woman of the world
Z eSides, but something held me
Jack. Therein lay my mistake.
instead I wrote to Martha about
!, and played right into her
lands.
We drove up to the house along
bout cocktail time and were in
/ brmed by Torr, the Swedish fam
/ iH retainer, that Miss Martha was
] N the terrace.
We went out and found several
people slipping drinks. One, a
gorgeous blonde I've known since
childhood, got up and kissed me
on the cheek.
Hello, Billie deah," this in a
hoarse draw acquired since child
hood, 1--WE heard you were coming
home, so we whipped over to say
ne1lo."
I introduced Hank, who caused
the usual furry, and was just pour
ing us out highballs when heard
my name called in childish accents
from the lawn. Not having any
youthful friends or relatives, I
turned around in surprise and rec
ognized Martha.
] say recognized" because I
was so startled. It might have
been Shirley Temple standing
there. She had on one Of those
short ruffly dresses that show
every bit of leg there is to show,
little short socks, and blue hair
ribbon.
The final touch was a Raggedy
Amy or whatever they're called
clasped in her arms. Before I
had a chance to recover, she
landed on me with a lot Of "Oh,
Bee'ils" while she hissed. Don't
YOU dare give me away" in my
ear.
If I did, I knew she'd never for
Fve me. I thought it would be
interesting to see how much Hank
would swallow. So I merely said:
Hank. this is the kid sister
you've heard me talk about" at
which Martha gazed up at him
ihv,y and said How do"
Well. to my surprise, Hank
box It all in. He said Hello.
hat are you doing with that old
5ll?"
Martha Rugged the thing all
he tighter and said. Don't you
/ mlt nv Raggedy Anne. won't
have IT,"
Hank said, "oh you won't,
E9n't you'll All right then. I
wort give you the great big
beautiful Mama doll I brought. 81
81 GUILTY FEELING
couldn't stand any more of
th,. and still preserve the lining
ot my stomach, so I ducked into
the house where I could laugh.
Then I went up to my room
ana took a shower to get rid of
eehe of the feeling of guilt.