The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1937-06-07
NOW
Amusing Tale
And Nice One
ON TOURISTS
BY HELEN EssARY


A crop of anecdotes begins TO-
days stint.
A friend was down town shop
ping Saturday when q strange
woman rushed UP to her and be
gan talking. Seeing no recognition
in my friends face, the woman
said:
weren't you Caroline Wood
before your marriage?"
mo, I wasn't"
The strange woman stared In
bewilderment and asked fiercely:
care you sure?" ..
The next tale is about Mr.. Frank
r. Jelleff. When Mr.. Jelleff
learned that very dear old lady,
born in house on the site Of his
F Street store, was i'll in q George
town home on her birthday, he
promptly sent her a huge box OF
gifts.
Labeled the packages to 'The
Stores First Citizen" and tucked
in q personal note with the cheer
full offerings.
Robert v. Fleming, president OF
the Riggs Bank, who always looks
like he hasn't care in the world,
also has stepped into the depart
ment store business.
He's helping run q large shop
whose only. manager recently died
and left his affairs to be guided
by Mr.. Fleming's bank.
Representative Charles W.
Toby, Of New Hampshire. has a
story about mice and fruit trees
that he hopes will break the
Handicapped heart of Congress
before the next adjournment.
The past winter in New Eng
land, Lawmaker Toby says, was
what orehardistS call an open
winter. Mice, which always have
. taste for fruit trees, didn't
have to cope with the snow in
their burrowing towards the tree
roots. The result has been that
the roots Of many fine fruit
tree have been chewed almost
to the trunk. Mr.. Toby wants
Congress to do something about it..
About this time Of the year
we craven Americans begin apollo
giving for the American tourist.
= We say when, I go abroad I
ana always so embarrassed by
American tourists. They behave
so strangely. Where do they
come from, anyhow? They are
never anybody you know"
where do they come fromp
They come from the sort Of
places lofty travellers like you
and come from. From the sort
of places English, French and
German tourists would come
from If they had the imagina-
ton and the energy and the
freedom and cash to come to
America.
One Of our unhappy objections
to DUR own breed abroad Is their
attempt to speak foreign
languages. We say, isn't it too
terrible" when an American tries
to speak a European tongue.
my dear, their accentS!"
But when q foreigner from any
port comes to this country and
tries to talk to us, We say:
"Isn't he too fascinating!
Don't you just adore to listen
to him."
" And when an Englishr1an
speaks any sort Of English we
fall intoNa rapturous faint about
his beautiful voice. Cockney or
Oxford---it's the same to US. -. -.
Another OF our apologies for
the American tourist IS our hui.
initiation over the way he spends
money. We protest:
"ActualIy the fOreig ers
themselves are embarrassed for
u.s."
Embarrassed! Embar r SSe d!
Did YOU say. When was any mer-
chant Of theater or cafe owner,
foreign or native born, em'bar-
raised by money freely spent over
his counter? :
"And the tipping" we sigh.
cts too bad the way the
American tourist Overtips. Even
the pOrters despise Us for our
extravaganza" -
I ask you, has the contempt
ever been so great that the tip
was handed back? ....
In our national humility we re-
gret that the American tourist is
so noisy.
But when foreigners laugh and
shout at each other in their ma
tive environment, we exclaim:
'What gaiety these people
have. Aren't they picturesque?
What a glorious joy in life!"
I think It's time Americans got
I'D from their knees and realized
that they are the equal If not the
superior Of most Europeans.
We might begin our emancipa-
tion from humility by not worry
ing about the American tourist.
Certainly we are tourists, all Of
lis. Some of us are only a little
distance from the covered wagon