The Ely miner. [volume] (Ely, Minn.) 1895-1986, 1937-07-08
Start Early, Girls,
to Find Real Mate,
Expert Admonishes
Widen Circle of Friends,
Improve Your Personality

New YOrk.-GO out OF your
way to make friends, improve
your personality, get out of a
rut, and give real time and
thought to finding a husband.
These admonitions were given
along with much other practi-
cal advice on how to win a
mate, directed particularly to
college girls and other intelli-
gent women by DR.. Paul Pope
noe, general director of the In
stitute of Family Relations,
Los Angeles, Calf.
Two difficulties hamper the girl
who would like to marry, but can
not find suitable partner, DR.. Pop
enoe says. The first has to do with
her marriageability; the second
with lack of opportunities for meet
ing eligible young men.
Here are the elements that 60
to make up marriageability, as out
lined by DR.. Popenoe from h S
broad experience in the study of
married couples at the Institute of
Family Relations:
/. The girl must be sexually nor
NAL. If she is mannish or engrossed
with persons of her own sex, she
may be cured provided this is a
psychological condition. The hap
piest marriages are between wom-
anly women and manly men.
Mustn't Be Suspicious.
2. She must be emotionally grown
up. The infantile girl is likely to
have a fear of sex that, uncon-
sciously perhaps, prevents her from
desiring or attaining happy mar
riage.
3. She must not be suspicious or
stand-offish by disposition.
4. She must not make the mis-
take of relying on her diploma to
charm desirable potential husbands.
When $50 happy, educated married
couples were asked what they found
most admirable in their respective
mates, most of the women stressed
intellectual companionability. B u t
the husbands were pleased with
something quite different-it was the
wife's ability to do her job and be
equal to the responsibilities of mar
riage.
A girl to be attractive as a wife
must appeal to the mans emotion,
she must be able to enhance his
ego, and she must have domestic
competence. If she lacks these as
sets, she can not offset the deicien-
cy by putting forward quality that
he does not particularly want-ca-
pacity to satisfy him Intellectually.
Be Seductive, AIluring.
For the woman who possesses
these points of marriageability, the
Importance of the correct technique
for winning mate was stressed
by DR.. Popenoe who has many prac-
teal hints to offer in this connection.
Don't be misled by thinking that
you must take the initiative in
courtship or proposal, he warns ed
ucated women. The role of the fe-
male as seductive and alluring rath-
er than aggressive goes back in evo-
luton not only far beyond the hui
man, but far beyond the man.
malian stage; it is unlikely that it
can be disregarded now, he warns.
'The woman who is not clever
enough to maneuver a man into a
position where he will propose, is
probably not clever enough to hold
man after she gets one," he said.
Age tells heavily against the col
lege girl. She probably does not
graduate until she is twenty-five.
At that age half the women of the
United States are already married.
Men usually marry younger women;
at twenty-five, a man will marry
girl of twenty-five, but at thirty
five he will marry one not of thirty
two but of twenty-eight. If the col
lege girl takes a job for a few
years after she graduates, her sta
tistical chances of marriage will
vanish, DR.. Popenoe points out.