The Washington times., 1937-05-13

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BY Louis SObOI-
Diary Of a CoIyumist's
Pup!
Tuesday-Chronic Coma is read,
ing the Pulitzer Prize awards and
mumbling to himself, and the
Queen says: II wonder if they'll
ever give a prize to a Broadway
columnist" {. For what?" bellows
he, and she says: For the out
standing gag or the outstanding
news beat" and he says: Column
lists don't need Pulitzer prizes. -.
st guess you're right" murmurs
the Queen. Every day one or the
other Of you hands out awards for
Scoops-to yourselves"
The Queen is in a soft mood
reading about the Duke of Wind
sOr and some lady named Wally.
ct is more wonderful than fic-
ton any one could write" she
purrs. "a man without hesita-
ton giving up an empire just to
marry the woman of his choice.
1t is too wonderful. If a man
did that for me 1 would devote
the rest of my life making him
happy"
ooh, lay off that sentimental
drivel," grOwlS Pushface. I'm
few years from new she'll prob
ably be throwing up to him that
she married him even though he
was out Of q job at the time"
Wednesday-They were to a
favorite place of theirs called the
Frolics last night where they go
for laffs that some funny fellows
named Joe Lewis and OshinS and
Lessy hand out but the Queen was
more impressed with a dance team,
Dorothy Fox and Charles AmeS.
"They are perfect" she gusheS.
"I'n bet they'll be on top some
day." and the Growler Kisses:
Maybe" She says: "Of course
they will. Did you see how they
look at each other with such love
in their eyes all the time they're
dancing" He says: IF it'll inter
est your sentimental heart, at the
end of their engagement, they're
breaking up. They don't even talk
to each other now"
They're discussing how Jere-
miah Mahoney has endowed three
parks for kids, but doesn't want
any publicity on it. That's sweet
of him, isn't it," says the Queen.
IF I ever have money of my own
that's exactly what I would do"
Thursday-A big airship which
looks like a large silver cigar
floats by today and we all look
at it from the terrace. isn't it
wonderful" says the Queen. TIC
think that only few hours ago,
so to speak, it was over Germany
and here it is in New York. Some
day I'd like to make a trip in a
big balloon like that"
Not me-" says Drizzle-pan. 81
don't ever want to go higher up
than where I can get down to
land quick by elevator. You take
the flying thrills. I'm satisfied
with trains and boats"
He has a date to take Junior
Laemmle to the races at Jamaica
tomorrow and the Queen says
she wants him to bet ST on the
nose of some horse he's sure will
win. Suppose he loses?" asks
Befuddled. What happens?" {.
"Oh," she gushes, II don't want
you to bet unless you're sure it'll
win. I'm going to bet IS Satur-
day on Sir Damion and then buy
Q new dress"
I'm not guaranteeing Sir
Damion will Win," he says, and
the Queen says, confidently: "Oh,
he can't lose. He has a winning
name"
Friday-The big balloon had a
terrible accident right after we
saw it yesterday and lots of peo-
pie were killed. tits too horri-
ble," says the Queen. Il won't
be able to sleep all night just
thinking of it." SourpusS admits
it's an awful catastrophe and
says that more than ever now
he's convinced that he'll never
fly.
Saturday Well, udd'nhead
has a pretty good day of it at the
races and he hands the Queen S.
which he says he has won for
her. He says he will put all his
winnings on Sir Damion on the
nose and win enough money to
maybe pay for the trip he's prom
iSed her.
He ran into Edward G. Robin.
son Of the movies. who told him
that he has a frog named kid
Gallahad," which he is shipping
by plane to Angels Camp in Cal
ifornia to enter the International
Jumping Frog Jubilee next Satur-
day.
Seems like a silly idea for
grown men," says the Queen,