Evening star., 1937-09-02

For Dining
In Public
Don't Leave the Party
to Chat With Friends
at Other Tables.
BY EMILY POST.

DEAR MRS. POST: If one enters a
restaurant with q group of friends
and sees . good friend unknown to
the others sitting with her family
across the dining room, Is one sup
posed to leave the group to 20 over
and say something to her? I merely
smiled and nodded the other day when
this situation occurred and my friend
thinks that I was publicly rude to her.
Answer: On the contrary, you did
exactly what you ought to do. To
nave done what your friend expected
would have been just the sort of
thing not TO do in public. In other
words, to have left a group OF people
with whom you had been seated and
making your hostess wait to give
her order for you while you went to
talk to people at another table would
have been excusable only il there was
an urgent reason why you had to
give message to your other friend
at once. Even in this case it would
have been better to send a note by
= waiter. If your friend still thinks
you were wrong, you might ask her to
try to imagine what a restaurant
would be like If all the people at
all the tables kept running from
friend to friend at other tables and
how pleasant it would be for hostess
II all her guests kept jumping up and
dashing of one by one to say hello
to every one they might happen to
know!
YEAR MRS. POST: The other day
l went to restaurant with
friend and passed the table Of other
friends with whom I stopped for
minute to exchange greetings. The
man with whom 1 was lunching thinks
that l should have introduced him
and imagine he feels that l didn't
want the other people to meet him.
There was no such reason; l merely
thought 1t awkward with so many
people overhearing the names.
Answer: First OF all you should
never stand at . table for any length
OF time. You should have said no
more than q word or two in passing.
On the other hand, If some one kept
you 4 minute because of something
important to say to you, your COM
panion would have had to be very
lacking in worldly experience to feel
self conscious. To have introduced
him all around Q table would have
been conspicuous and stupid-unless
for an especial reason. At a small
Summer resort where he and your
other friends would be likely to meet
again and be glad to know each
other, that would be a good reason.
But usually introducing a stranger to
strangers under such circumstances
has no point.
+ X
NEAR MRS. POST: I have never
been in New York and would like
to 60 there for 4 week this month.
Being q perfect stranger. know
nothing about the city. which is why
. young man I know here has sug-
gested that he go too and stay at
another hotel and we could have 4
lot Of fun together sight seeing and
going to theaters. He knows New
York and would be an excellent guide.
But mother says, What about Mrs.
Grundy?"
AnsWer-Seriously. I think it would
be very foolish thing to do. In the
first place, New York is much too big
to testify that you and he stayed in
separate hotels, and in the second. to
have TO explain to your neighbors that
you did not stay in the same hotel
gives the same Mrs. Grundy just the
scandal out of what you alone know
to have been actually proper behavior
nEAR MRS. POST: have been
seeing . good deal of 4 young
man, and II We have to take
our vacations apart We would rather
stay at home. Young married
friends Of ours have offered to help
us out by going with US to some re-
sort for . week or two. Mother
treats the idea coolly and warns us
that Mrs Grundy would not approve
and that people will talk, but she sug-
gested writing to you.
Answer-N you are chaperoned by
friends who are married, nothing
could be more proper.