The midland journal. (Rising Sun, Md.) 1885-1947, 1937-02-12

wondering why this
or that government 49,
chooses for an en-
blem some noble irwin >. CODD
creature when the
turkey buzzard or the grave-rob-
bling hyena would be so appropri-
ate.
Fierce winters and devastating
floods may be curing us here on
this side of the water, but at least
we have been spared the affliction
of having for our next-door neigh
bors certain nations.
Kidnapers' RansOms.
IT'S all well enough to pass an
= act making payment of ransom
to kidnaper a criminal offense-
as though heartbroken parents would
hesitate to pay ransoms to get
their babies back, no matter what
the penalty for so doing might be!
And can you see any American jury
convicting those parents? The au-
thor of the law is no doubt well-in-
tentioned but there is another law,
called the law of human nature,
which most surely would defeat his
purposes.
By the way, person who should
know what he's talking about, tells
me that three out of every four
known kidnapers during recent
years have been ex-convicts with
records as repeated offenders.
So, instead of trying to penalize
agonized parents for obeying a ma
tural instinct, how about a snappy
little law to curb certain parole
boards which seem to delight in
turning 'em out as fast as the courts
can clap 'em in?
Optimism De Luxe.
LIKE the spirit of a gentleman
in New York who started dredg-
ing operations in East river. He
set out to dig up a minimum of $4,-
100000 in gold and silver from the
ooze, and to date has salvaged 90
cents, two rusty frying pans and a
penknife-and is still probing.
For gorgeous optimism I can
think of but one case to match this.
I was on the French Riviera one
summer. They'd been shifting the
railroad tracks along the Grand
Corniche. This left a disused tun-
mel. So, week after week, a beard
ed gentleman sat at one mouth of
the empty bore with sign over his
head reading: "This property for
SALE" When I left he was still
there, waiting for somebody who
was in the market for a second
hand tunnel.
South American Explorers.
OF RECENT years, those hardy
~ adventures who set forth to
invade the last great unexplored
area, interior South America, seem
to follow a regular routine, to wit,
as follows:
First-They start off.
Second-They get lost.
Third-They are rescued.
But wouldn't it save wear and
tear and nervous strain if the rescue
expedition went on ahead so it could
get settled down in camp all nice
and comfortable and be waiting for
the explorers when they staggered
in, exhausted from toting all those
tons of material for future lee
ture tours? The modern discover
er is gallant, but apparently has
no more sense of direction than an
egg-beater and seemingly could get
lost on top of a marble-top table.
Or possibly the tropic sun has an
adding effect on the human brain.
Anyhow, since nearly always he
is in an intact state when res
cued, this would seem to indicate
that the head-hunters of the Anna
zonian jungles are now getting
fussy about the types of heads they
collect.
The Charms of Music.
A CCORDING to a medical pro-
"A lessor in Pennsylvania, sam
pies of whisky, when subjected to
a musical sound treatment for sew
en- hours, produce a liquor which
equals one that has been aged in
wood for at least four years. But
why get excited about this? I've
known certain brands of classical
music which, in one evening, have
aged a grown man to a point where
he figures the present Christian era
must be about over.
Only a few weeks ago, being soft
ened by the spirit of the approach
ing holidays, suffered myself to be
lured to a Chopin recital and got
TANNED in and couldn't escape
and finally staggered forth into the
night feeling that Methuselah had
little if anything on me.