Evening star., 1937-08-05

- o.-4ne gentlemen VINO man
age Joe Louis, heavyweight
4 champion Of the world, justly
are proud of the fortifications they
have thrown up around the new ice
box in Joe's training camp.
They call the larder Gibraltar, and
well they may. 1t is impregnable by
land and sea. There still Is the dan
ger of an air attack, but the defenders
feel that by the time Louis can muster
up an air fleet and storm the pork
| chops from above, they will have per-
| fected their defense against this mod
ern type OF warfare.
They have cunning hand to deal
with, to be sure. Joe is the Jimmy
Valentine of the ice box-cracking
| racket. He has a sure ear for the
click Of the tumblers and a sensitive
set OF Understandings fingers, they
are known professionally.
Held Early Advantage.
tn THE early stages Of the skirmish
between Joe and the custodians Of
the commiSsary-Mike Jacobs, Julian
Black, John Roxborough and Jack
Blackburn-the fighting was pretty
much hit or miss, with the advantage
all on Louis side. The defense tried
a Yale lock, and found the chicken
missing in the morning. Then they
tried the Yale line. with Larry Kelley
playing right end This was no good.
Joe went of tackle for five chops and
q slab Of apple pie.
Il read back through the history Of
siege warfare" says the scholarly Mr.
Roxborough, "in order to find a de-
fense for every attacking maneuver
but overlooked the siege OF Troy. I,
seems that certain Greek veteran
! named Skenopolos, who saw action
at Troy, had tipped Joe of to the
wooden horse maneuver. We didn't
think there was any harm in letting
wooden horse into the ice box espe-
cially a wooden horse with a kind
face, but the next day the melon was
gone, as we'll as quart of ice cream
In mixed flavors."
Joe Wins With Pontoons.
Moscow fell next. followed by
Mafeking. The defense worked
| for several weeks on a new system of
bridge, but Joe gained the citadel by
means of pontoons and carried of
drumstick and the ke- to the fortress.
The garrison then threw up a model
| of the Bastille, and sure enough, on
July IA, it fell, with heavy losses in
the pate de foie gras department.
why don't we build a haha," sug-
| gested Mr.. Roxborough, "or counter
scarp?"
What in hell is haha?" demanded
Mr.. Jacobs. You build one and I
will sign the check
But the boys we're unable to find the
| materials for even q mediums sized
/ haha. Finally, in desperation, they
consulted the experts at West Point
and evolved the present system which
is known affectionately around the
| camp as Gibraltar, or Old Glib. am
sworn to secrecy concerning the details
of the new fortification. but think I
am betraying no trust when I say
that it involves bartizan. Martello
| tower, = merton, casemate, a barra-
coon, one portcullis in fair condition
and as tidy a fauSsebraye as ever you
saw.
So Far, So Good.
IT TP TO date" reports Mr.. Roxbor-
ough, the keeper of the postern
gate, I'VE have not missed so much as
a French olive. Our only weakness is
from the air, and nay only fear is that
Joe will retaliate with falconry, which
consists OF employing q trained bird
to spear the stun from above for 10
per cent Of the total take. That's his
only chance. We will have our anti
aircraft defenses perfected before he
can learn to fly plane"
If said that Joe is happy under
present conditions, would be palter-
ing with the facts, toying with the
truth and smashing the Ten Com
mandments. He is vexed. No trench
erman OF even fair talent and capacity
likes to have his midnight snacks
shot from under him, and Joe is a
1
praised by such qualified critics As
Escoffier, De Bells, Liagro (the Portu-
guese master) and DR.. Harry George,
champion lamb chop eater of the
Middle Atlantic States.
Tends to Be Spherical.
! RUT his managers and stockholders
are determined to keep the Bomb
er honed down to fighting weight.
He meets Tommy Farr on the 26th
OF this month in defense Of the title.
1t shouldn't be hard fight for JOS
eph. He has been fighting steadily,
and his flanks are reasonably trim
for Joe. The danger lies not SO much
in this next bout as In the campaigns
of 1898 and 1899.
If Joe were allowed to do so, he
would eat himself spherical In two
months. His shape has tendency
toward the spheroid already. particu-
larly in the neighborhood Of the
jowls. What would happen II he
ever turned himself loose to Craze in
thicket of corn on the cob, with the
butter ready to hand? That's a
thought which makes Mr.. Jacobs,
Mr.. Roxborough and Mr.. Black shud-
der in close harmony, but at the
same time it's a vision that occupies
fully 10 per cent Of Joe's sleeping
hours
He also dreams three hours of
steak, three Of chicken. three Of :ce
cream and one Of Detroit winning the
pennant. That IS the regular week
day schedule, subject to change with
out notice.
Just now he Is splintering his spear
ON the walls Of Gibraltar, the newly
fortified ice box-but I would advise
Mr.. Roxborough to add three fresh
sentries to the pay roll and strengthen
the sconce and the buttress. The siege
has only begun.
(copyright, 1887, BY the North American
Newspaper Alliance, Inc)