The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1937-07-08
Listen, World!

by ELSLG NOOuLSOH
rs your home free-forall2
Is anyone welcome to share your family circle, borrow
your best socks and small change guest room your
long distance phone and your beer SUPPLY -
Or do you believe in "ruaOng the hne as Grandpa did
admitting to your home only those 1ho meet your per-
sondL standards?
OIdfashioned questions? Maybe. But they become
plenty pertnent-as the Etons have discovered.
The Eltons are grand couple good looking, lively,
generous in their early thrtes with swell little place.
Just short out of town. Not much moneybut Heens
wizard at managing and Dams marvellous host
At first when they moved the city, things had seemed
bit slow. They'd counted lot on that Back home
the old folks had been pretty fusy Grandpa and Gramma
didn't hod with young folks gaddng around-draggng
perfect strangers the home Vstngreasoned Gramma
cost money took lot of time and trouble. Most folks
weren't worth it. Besides, you oughta be choosey about
those you invite into your own home
Naturally this seemed dreary philosophy to friendly
young Dan and Helen Just wait until they married.
they'd show 'em
And "show 'em" they speedily did Dan started with
couple of fellows from the office They in turn had wives
sisters pals. In time at ALL the Eons were the center of
Grand Crowd Visits longer occasional
dropped in nightly Weekends became regular
jamborees. They surely were having One Swell Time:
Of course had its drawbacks Now and then they'd real
ze that they hadn't read decent book in months hadn't
had quiet evening together for And certainly
surprising how the bills mounted-groceres cigarettes gn
all that extra laundry!
CAV shucks-theyre good gang and worth it" grnned
Dan-decng he could make the old overcoat do another
Helen Loyalty agreedeven while ruefuly cycling
the cigarette burns her best nen the rings on the incest
tables.
So went With each party the crowd seemed larger
there strange faces. Andyou couldn't deny it
of these New Eggs certainly tough babies Helen
squirmed bawdy stories Dan wrhed under vouptuous
embraces from unnroduced brunees Centerve
like this
Then the inevitable happened A party broke up in
drunken brawmen breaking chairs-grs screechng with
hystera-someone pulling gun. neghbor phoned. The
door opened to an inqurng cop.
After they'd all left Helen and Dan sat down-checked
up And found? Their home wreck. Their budget was
months red Their personal habits and standards were
smashed to smithereens They'd been spending time money
energy and affection mob of rowdeshaf Of whom they
didn't know-a of whom treated their home simply as con-
venient hang-out and regarded them as SUCKERSl
Not very fatterng conclusion But it's safe bet that
nine out of ten Good Fellows would reach the conclu
sion if they dared face their amusement list
Today Dan and Helen have quidated 80 cent of The
Crowd They are longer popular To the contrary their
erstwhile friends" frankly dub them 'tghtwads or
"screwy."
But the Etons don't mind They have salvaged themselves
and their sefrespect They longer running road
house-THEY HAVE HOME. AND BEFORE YOU CAN
ENTER THAT HOME YOU HAVE TO RATE.
So-maybe Grandpa and Gramma weren't such old fossils
after all!
This column 1Uecomes and requests comments. Letters
presenting personal problems also be SENT AH tettes
will be hQmdIed contdentidly and answered promptly
slammed addressed envelopes are Gnctuded.)
Features Syndicate IncO