The Washington times., 1937-01-01
NOW
I'VE Hereby
ResOLUe'
STUDYING APES
By HELEN EssARY


A State Department gentleman,
who knows more than he tells, says
that if there had been no neutral
ity law of any sort, this Govern
ment could have legally refused
Mr.. Cuse the license to ship air
planes to Spain.
A fresh New Year tuned in on
Eternity few hours ago. I hereby
suggest a few assorted resolutions
for any good woman who hopes to
keep the young 1887 unblotted:
Do not say, II suppose war is
inevitable, human nature being
what it is"
Have one or two convictions that
can't be altered by a dinner invita-
ton or a glass of champagne.
If you feel superior to those
present try not to let your loftiness
be known.
Don't be more polite to the rich
and powerful than the poor and
struggling.
Don't limit your truth speaking
to the days you got up on the
wrong side of the bed.
Flatter, flatter where you may,
but hate yourself for doing it.
Always believe that the most
attractive woman at the party
has a beautiful nature.
Never think that the most in
teresting man in the room is
misunderstood by his clod Of a
wife.
Buy no puppies. No canaries.
No kittens. And no guppleS.
Get new electric bulbs for the
guest room.
Stay at no party later than II
o'clock.
Straighten desk drawers.
Do something about the old
papers in the sitting room closet.
- Sew IA loose buttons and snaps
where they belong.
Let no telephone conversation
last more than three minutes.
Do not freshen up the face in
public.
Speak sweetly Of the absent.
Never make an engagement
without consulting Father. And
when he says, "I've been out
enough this week." reply, Just as
you wish, darling"
Pay up charge accounts and
charge no more.
Answer all invitations the morn
ing they are received. Walk
somewhere, sometime.
Always correct the children in
q cool, soft voice.
Find out what your servants
think of you. Then see how you
feel.
Return borrowed books, calls,
! cups of sugar and sticks of butter.
BE happy, but not too happy,
ct breakfast.
Remember names AND faces.
Keep all engagements on the
minute.
Listen in rapt fascination while
other people talk about Them
selves.
Take five minutes out of every
day and really think. Or try to
think.
Andrew Wylie, who left Tuesday
for Borneo, Java and Sumatra
with a scientific expedition, is fac
ing a New Year in which he will
need resolution, courage and a
hearty sense of humor. Fresh
news of the trip of which Mr..
Wylie is part, financed incident
ally by the Carnegie Institute, the
Columbia University Council for
Research in the Social Sciences,
and the Milton Fund of Harvard,
indicates that it's real purpose is
to catch a glimpse Of man in the
making.
By nine months of living in
jungles with anthropoid apes
these American scientists hope TO
learn about the missing links be.
tween monkeys and men. Mans
slow evolution from ape to man
ape, to ape-man and finally man.
will, the scientists think, be re
vealed by watching the gibbons.
These animals resemble man in
appearance. They are Sociable
and have family and group life
not unlike mans except that they
are less frequently given tc
divorce.
DR.. C. r. Carpenter, the pSy
chologist member of the party
will spend four happy months ir
Siam studying the gibbons. Other
members of the party, meanwhile
will make geological collections o1
mammals and birds with Specia
attention to monkeys.
The orang-utan, another charm
ing ape species, will be the par
ticular companion of the scientist
in Sumatra. 1t is thought that as
soon as the gibbons and orang
utans become accustomed to the
presence of the scientific gentle
men, making camp in their midst
they will lose their Shyness. Their
the party will settle down to note
taking and careful investigation
rrtoa FiY3din5S of this evNaditior