Evening star., 1937-12-28
Your
Neighbors
We Are All Alike
In Our Concern
For Children.
BY ANGELO PATRI.


PUBL1C opinion can be a great moral
force. It can also be q bogey.
Many a conscientious mother is driv-
en- to nervous collapse, not by the
naughtiness of the children but by
the thought of what the neighbors
are going to say now.
Neighbors will talk. We are all
neighbors, so We know how it IS. But
what Of it? Children are born of
human parents and are consequently
very human and altogether imper-
feet. They are noisy. destructive, ILL
hammered in social relations. AS they
grow to the age of indiscretion they
do many things that send shivers of
apprehension down their mothers
spines and set the neighbors talking.
There's nothing to be done about it,
and doubt that any of us would
do anything if we could, because
there is no definite value in public
opinion where childrens behavior is
concerned. The only thing any moth
er or father can do Is never mind it."
It will be some one else's turn tomor-
row.
The important thing about it is not
to allow the fear of what the neigh
bors say to cramp parental style.
Accept the fact that the neighbors
are going to say something, one to
the other, and hope for the best mean
while going straight through with
whatever duty is imposed upon one
by a child's behavior.
A little child sometimes decides
that he doesn't want to go into the
house at the close of his day. He
does not answer his call. When moth
er or some one else goes afG.r him ne
makes q scene, and mother is con-
scious Of eyes behind the window
screens. Never mind them. Take
hold Of young son; keep your temper:
don't add the weight of the neighbor's
opinion to your feeling that this child
needs discipline. Keep your eye on
the child, never mind the rest The
neighbor really does not care one way
or the other and will heartily sustain
you should you need assistance.
The older children sometimes en-
barrass their parents by unusual be-
havior. One of them takes 3 drink
he never had before and learns some-
thing. Perhaps it Is the way of q
maid with lad that sets the pot
a-boiling. Maybe a promising young
ster is sent home from school with a
message from the dean. Any and all
of these are likely to happen in the
most carefully reared family. The
thing to do is so take time out to
consider what is to be done for the
good of the child without regard to
what the neighbors are thinking or
saying. Stick to the needs of the
child, attend to them and let the
tongues wag as they will.
The strange thing about it all IS
that the neighbors are really kindly.
They know in their hearts that it
will be their turn soon and they
await the day with bated breath. They
denounce the sinner, maybe; but that
Is because they are afraid that their
own will take the same road some
day and they want to serve warning
on him, and all others likely to be
numbered with him in Sin" They
are as much afraid Of . child's going
wrong as the next one, for we are
all alike in our concern for children.
Just accept the neighbors and their
opinions. Rarely, very rarely, will
they be unjust, unsympathetic and
hard. They understand. Go ahead
and deal as best you can with the
youngsters. BY and by they grow
up to be Just like the neighbors,
strange as it sounds. .
Copyright. 1879 =.