Evening star., 1937-04-11

oah. A strange court, indeed, that tn,
guests saw: Pharaoh sitting on q soar
box before packing box for a desk
smoothing out the crushed stub of 6
half-burned cigarette and fitting il
into long holder. A slave, answer.
ing to the name Of Mac announced
that it was IL o'clock-almost tim,
Tor Pharaohs 1890 press conference
and it developed that the entire cour,
was hungry, and needed a busines.
man.
That's me, little Joseph in person.
exclaimed a self-satisfied figure wht
enters bearing book and a farm
program!
Are you a business man?" asked
Pharaoh.
Joseph admitted he was.
So Pharaoh confessed: IT had q
dream last night. There were seven
nice, fat budgets, all printed in black
ink"
I'm black ink-that was a dream y
said Mac.
And along came seven scrawny
budgets, all printed in red ink. and
they ate up the black budgets, getting
redder all the time" continued Pha.
raoh.
The meaning of the dream was elu-
cldated in a book, not Gone With
the Wind" but the Book of Genesis
Therein Joseph found an agricultural
program:
For seven years I go around buy
ing up cheap all the stuff that the
farmers can't use. Then along comes
your famine and you sell it back to
them. It's all right there in the
book"
Pharaoh: "You mean the farmers
pay money to the government. How
quaint"
Joseph: "Sure. Why, after a cou-
pie of years they don't have a dime
left"
Pharaoh: But what do we do
then? Put 'em back on relief?"
Joseph: Boss, would that be busi-
ness"
Pharaoh finally agreed. Swell!
The crisis-quiet as it was-is over.
Mac, call in the newspaper boys. III
tell them about the special message
I'm sending to Congress next week on
the ever-normal granary."
United States Senators, Inc.
Turning from the executive side Of
the Government, the club explored
United States Senators, Inc" meet
ing in the Office of Senator Royal S.
Copeland.
Senator's Reynolds, Nye Herring,
Bridges, Burke and Holt appeared to
offer their testimonials. Senator Her
ring kept repeating, like a Greek
chorus: How much do we get?"
Senator Reynolds wore whiskers, seek
ing to elude the North Carolina cigar
cite people following his Endorsement
of Virginia cigarettes; Senator Holt
agrees to indorse anything, even his
West Virginia colleague, Senator
Nicely; Senator Burke has an offer
from President Roosevelt to buy back
the Endorsement given the Nebraskan
in 1884, Senator Nye had an offer
from the Associated Battleship Build
ers of the World, and said:
why, this is an insult-that is, I
think it is. How much do they offer?"
Two bartenders, Farley and Ickes,
offered brief diversion at bar where
nothing but Government rum from
the Virgin Islands was sold A GUS
toner pronounced the verdict on Vir-
gin Island rum: Its made accord
ing to the old Federal recipe. If it
had been any better, the Govern
ment couldn't have made it, and if
1t had been any worse, couldn't
have drunk it."
But Bartender Ickes said: "That's
the trouble with some Of you people.
You never appreciate what the Gov
ernment does for you - Come the
revolution, he'll drink Government
rum and like it,"
Beside glowing fireplace, a group
Of neighboring economic royalists
gathered, in another skit, to hear a
fireside chat by President Roosevelt.
Great was their surprise when they
learned what was in store for them.
One said: How quantity delight
ful-just like going Summing"
Another said: "I heard him once.
Then my doctor put me on - diet"
And the hostess anxiously queries:
do you think We ought to let the
servants listen? They say he stirs
up the most awful ideas among the
lower classes"
The company sang Of their delight
in other radio programs, but:
What else can we do?
There's nothing on the air tonight
But flreside chat and you'll"
Then they are told what to ex-
pect:
"We hear a voice which softly rings,
The voice on the radio.
It promises so many things
The voice on the radio.
In dreams we drift through a twi-
light haze,
Under the spell Of magic phrase
And visions fair of happy days
The voice on the radio"
But when the broadcast came, 1t
was meaningless hub-bub of quacks
and squeaks and MARBLES.
Surely that's not i'm, sir?" pro-
tested butler.
Sounds just like him to me-" re-
piled the host.
One impressionable lady cried that:
Il am converted. I'm going to dis
charge two of my maids and send
their wages to Mr.. Farley. From now
on I am a New Dealer"
On being told that "You couldn't
understand a word he said" the lady
replied: "Of course not But what
difference does it make. Oh, that
lovely, lovely voice!''
Then, in the well-known air from
Samson and Delilah," the club sang:
My heart at thy sweet voice
Makes of me New Dealer,
For Utopia I am burning.
And when, in lullaby,
Thy voice sings in the ether,
For its echoes am yearning.