Evening star., 1937-09-17
Be Casual
In Dealing
With Youth
rs m art w ays" Are
Only Natural and
Not Terrifying.
BY ANGELO PATRI.

By ANGELO PATR1.
MUCH Of what is old is new and
exciting to youth. Age has to
remember that youth has just discov-
cred the thrill that daring and defy
ing age gives them. To them f1outing
tradition, breaking conventions, talk
ing smartly to the elders, is tremen-
dously exciting Love is new and
startling and mysterious and delight
ful. Drinking In the roadside inns;
dancing to the wailing Of the or
eheetra: speeding along perfect roads
IN starlight or moonlight, are all new
and delightful to youth. They are an
old story to age because age has tried
them all. That is the great difference
between the elders and youth.
Experience, having tried the whole
scheme through at one time or an
other, knows the price that has to
be paid for some of them, and, having
suffered themselves, long to save those
they love from the same anguish. 1t
S little enough of that sort of saving
any one can do. 1t is the right, the
instinct of youth to experiment.
Danger is no check, rather an incen-
tive. Talking, in the voice of au-
thority, is worse than useless. Yet
something must be done to mark the
thin ice.
Teaching that stimulates behavior
into fine character must be done in
the earlier years so that a child
arrives at adolescence with set of
experiences, set of inhibitions and
standards that are fairly certain to
carry him through this experimental
stage safely. If the teaching has been
left to this time it is not going to be
effective. Then only personal and
costly experience is going to teach the
youth.
One attitude would recommend.
When it comes to the smart ways of
youth, be casual. Don't lose your
head and Shrek because a young per-
son tries an experiment with life. 1t
may be dangerous experiment, but
your fear, your wild-eyed, clutching
fear, in the face of his newly dis
covered knowledge of the world, is
not going to check him. 1t is going
to influence him quite the other wav.
for he knows that you have eyperi-
mented just as he is doing now. He
knows that men and women have
been doing all the things he longs to
do since time began. What he does
not know is the effect the experiences
have had upon the men and women
q the race. And you cannot teach
him that. Life does that teaching.
But you can be honest and casual
about the whole matter. You can
smile with the coolness OF experience
and say, Smoking? Anybody can
smoke. What Of 1t? Drinking? All
ever got out OF it was a headache
and the knowledge had wasted time
and money. Love? Older than the
Oldest. Fine If It's taken right. but
. terrible mess If you happen to make
. mistake"
You can be friendly and candid.
You can talk things over in neigh
borly, friendly fashion with your
own children, not in a fear-stricken,
clutching, laundering parent style,
but AZ one human being to another.
- one, who knows the road, might
talk to the pilgrim about to begin it,
Life taken as q whole is good. So
are the people who live 1t. Don't get
too close to either of them in your
attempt to help the children get used
to the time-worn truths that are to
them vivid discoveries. Just be nat
ural-that is, casual.
Mr.. Patri has prepared leafiet
entitled, Spelling" in which he tells
parents how TO successfully help chill
dren with their spelling lessons. Send
for It. addressing your request to Mr..
Angelo Patri, Child Psychology De-
psrtment Of this paper, and enclose a
seh-addressed, stamped (3-cent) en-
velope.