Evening star., 1936-08-07
Invitations
Are Always
Answered
Only Exceptions Are
Those for Formal
Teas.
BY EMILY POST,

DEAR MRS. POST: Please, will you
49, settle an argument about when
to answer invitations? There are
quite few teas given in this city,
informal ones to which the invitations
are written on visiting cards. Are
these to be answered? And what
about the invitation written in the
third person requesting my company
at dance from 8 until l O'Clock,
which does not mention r. S. v. P.
or any of its English equivalents? l
did not answer the latter invitation,
but would, of course, had ] found i.
impossible to go.
AnSwer-InvitationS on visitin"
cards as we'll as those formally writ
ten are all supposed to be formal.
answered in third person. The onI
type of invitation requiring no ansWc
is a formal afternoon tea. When a
invitation is written on the visitir'
card of some one you know very we.
you can quite properly answer with
visiting card on which you writ
Accept with pleasure for July 1G
Nothing is ruder than neglecting
answer invitations.
x r
Dear Mrs. Post: If an invitation f
bridge or other party is receive
which is filled in on card printc
for that purpose, in what form i
one expected to answer?
AnsWer-In the third person form
or on your visiting card. (See answe.
aboVe)
Dear Mrs. Post: Through business
my husband knows two lawyers and
their wives very well. I know both
men and one wife slightly. We live
on the outskirts of town in a lovely
old house. which my husband is very
proud Of He would like to invite
both lawyers and their wives to dinner
on some Sunday during this month.
Frankly, I have no heSitancy in in
viting the couple I know, but I do
hesitate to ask the wife who is a
stranger. Would such an invitation
be very irregular and how would 60
about it?
Answer-1n the present day no one
is apt to take amiSs any gesture of
friendly hospitality. Write note of
invitation to both wives and write
to the one you don't know and ex-
plain to her that as your husbands
are friends, you hope that she and
her husband will dine on such and
such an evening. If they accept your
invitation, you are then free to ask
them again and as often as you
choose. Should one of them decline
your invitation. and give you no evi-
dence of friendliness whatsoever. you
would naturally not ask her again.
Dear Mrs. Post: We are having a
very simple wedding and would like
to limit the number of attendants TO
two. My fance'S best friend is mar
ried, as is my own best friend, but
unfortunately for US, not to each
other. Shall We explain to each that
if it were not for this fact, We would
certainly ask them, and then choose
our next best friends, who are single?
Answer: The fact that they are mar
IlcU-dIlU IlOI W SdCIl OIIlCI-IIdS dU-
solutely nothing to do with it. There
is not the slightest impropriety in
having the man who is married fOr
the best man and having matron Of
honor instead of maid. Nor is j,
necessary, nor even usual, that thc
husband of one and the wife of the
other be included in the bridal party
But they must, of course, be invited to
the marriage ceremony land to th0
rehearsal, too) and to the reception. CT
course. But it is not necessary thai
they be given places at the bridal table
unless there is only one table at which
X 4 X
Dear Mrs. Post: I am to be married
early this month at a large outdoor
wedding. The minister has a beau
tiful voice, and would love to ask
him to sing, since we are great personal
friends. But will it be proper foI
him to sing and then oficiate?
Answer: don't see how this coul6
seem suitable. but I think probablv
the clergyman knows better than dc