davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Kennewick courier-reporter. [volume] (Kennewick, Wash.) 1914-1938, 1936-07-16

= For vegetables of many kinds =
= and melons with the thinnest .
= rinds; for bread and but 2
= ter, sweets and meat =
= trade with John is sure a &
= treat. .
. . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Nothing dries quicker than
the tears Of . hypocrite.
- = =
And this is the time of year when
a young man can't decide whether
to get married or buy a new car.
= = =
Yes, son is getting on. Two years
ago he was wearing dads old suits;
now dad is wearing his.
= = =
A man may be as old as he feels.
says Dad Gummit, but usually not
as important.
- - =
Definition
STATESMAN-One who doesn't
care what nation he offends as long
as you and I do the fighting.
= - =
Judge Winkenwerder (about to
pronounce sentence): This robbery
was contaminated in a skillful and
adroit manner"
"Come, come now, Your Honor"
said the prisoner, blushing. mo
flattery, please"
= = =
Many q gal, Dad Gummit has
noted, Is still bottle fed, even
after she Is grown.
= = =
Definitions
WISE WIFE One who never
quarrels with her husband until af-
ter payday.
= = =
Doctsr@'T'm afraid there no hope,
MrR. Brown:
Her Husband where Do
you get that stuff? ] amt gonna
de"
Mrs.. Brown-'Teave Il 20 the doc.
tor, dear; he knows best"
= = =
POAGE
How doth the gentle lsandress
Search ont the weakest points,
And ever scrape the buttons off
At most strategic points?
= = =
Unless the people work, no theory
Of government win, In the opinion
Of Dad Gummit.
- - -
Did yoa ever note that most
Of the high-powered political
arguments are carried On BY
ginks who never vote, Or even
register.
= - =
The Kennewick courier-reporter. [volume] (Kennewick, Wash.) 1914-1938, 1936-07-16

Percy Whiffletree always gives up
his sest I'm the street car to . Wo-
man. Since childhood he always
had respect for woman with .
strap I'm her hand.
The Kennewick courier-reporter. [volume] (Kennewick, Wash.) 1914-1938, 1936-07-16

"How to Cook Parsnips" Is the
title Of the latest bulletin Of the
Department Of Agriculture. It tells
how, but not why.
The Kennewick courier-reporter. [volume] (Kennewick, Wash.) 1914-1938, 1936-07-16

CRnlNAL-A guy who II no
different from the rest Of Us, but
Who hrealEs different laws.
The Kennewick courier-reporter. [volume] (Kennewick, Wash.) 1914-1938, 1936-07-16

And It was no wonder the hostess
said take your pick" Is she passed
the BISCUITS. They were as hard as
rock.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1936-10-12
BLAMES MOTHER IN LAW

PITTSBURGH, Oct. IL G.N.SJ
"When the mother.in-law moves
in-is the devil a woman"
Not many Sundays ago the Rev.
William r. Pankey, pastor of the
Union Baptist Church Of Christ,
of Carrick, included that subject
in a series of sermons on Mar
riage and the Home"
Recently in divorce court, he
testified that he knew whereof he
spoke, for, in asking for a divorce
he blamed his mother-in- law for
upsetting his ship Of marital har.
mony.
In his original petition, Rev,
Pankey asked for a divorce on
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1936-10-12

grounds of desertion. Today he
told the court:
my wife said she would not
come back as long as her mother
lived. She said that If her
mother was satisfied she would
come back with her. Her mother
refused to consider the matter.
"She took a dislike to church
work and influenced my wife
against me-"
VOTE AMERICAN
YugosIaV Plums Popular
That the taste of Yugoslavia's
plums, even when dried, suits the
palates of her Central EUROPEAN
neighbors seems proved by the fact
that she already has exported
10000 of her surplus $4,000 metric
tons of that fruit.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1936-10-12
Church Celebrates
120th Anniversary

Celebration of the 120th ami
versary of Mt. Zion M. E. Church,
Twenty.ninth and Dumbarton
Ave-, the oldest colored religious
institution in the city, began
yesterday. The Rev. George E.
Curry is pastor.
Wednesday night will be Bap-
fist night and the Rev. E. C.
Smith, pastor of Metropolitan
Baptist Church, will speak. Thurs
day night the Rev. j. w. Mccoy,
pastor of Metropolitan Wesley
A. M. E. Zion Church, Ill!
preach. Friday night Bishop Ed
win H. Hughes, resident prelate
Of the M. E. Church, will speak.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1936-10-12
Cuban Mahogany

A charming Early American
Group with Chippendale influ
ence. An open stock group from
which you may pick just the pieces
you need for your room. There
are other pieces not illustrated.
See this lovely group at Mayer
& Co.
The Nome daily nugget., 1936-12-30
Grave Digger Says Job Depressing
 At Times
(Bv The Associated PreSs)

(Bv The Associated Press)
 KENYON, Ohio, Dec. 28-Eddie Mullins,who digs graves in Grove cemetery, admits his jobs a bit depressing but it would be worse if it weren't for Jersey and Ma ble-his pet cows.
 Eddie, who loves animals and would like to have farm of his own, walked into the dry brown pasture to the east of the ceme- tery. He had just finished plant ing some evergreens and had a few minutes to spend with his friends.
 Both trotted toward him, each apparently to be first to receive a pat on the head. Jersey won the trot.
 Jersey Cow Prays
 Don't you think it would be a good time to pray for rain so the grass will be green again?" said Mullins to Jersey. :. Jersey looked at him for mo- ment and then sank to her front knees, her head almost to the ground, but she still had her eyes focused on him.
 :. Look at yOu," reprOved Eddie. you'll never get rain by praying that way" Jersey then bowed her head until her chin touched the ground.
 Mable Shows Her Love
 "That's better" said Mullins.
 (Continued on Page Four)
The Nome daily nugget., 1936-12-30
A Standstill In Strike Negotiations
Gold Experts
 Say New High
(Bv The Associated Press ]

tBv The Associated Press,
 WASHINGTON, D. C., Dec. 30, Experts in the U. s. Treasury have calculated that the worlds 1886 crop of gold will reach a new peak, and are pondering its possible effect on international money markets.
 The production estimated for the world including Russia, was given a suggested total output of gold this year of about forty mil Lion ounces as compared to the previous peak of thirty million ounces in 1885.
 The tight gr.p governments now have on their currency struc lures, makes it difficult to pre- dict how the outpouring will be reflected in the money markets, it was explained.
 The experts said it was their opinions that the effect would be cushioned in the United States by the Treasury's recently an- nounced decision to "sterilize" newly acquired gold and prevent it's use in credit imitation.
The Nome daily nugget., 1936-12-30
Liars Club Has Real Queen Of
 The Tall Tales
(Bv The Associated Press)


 CHICAGO, Dec. 30, - The worlds organized liars hailed Queen Mrs. Gale Farmhouse, of Flowerville, Michigan. as the winner last night, at the annual meeting of the Burlington, Wis cons.n Liars Club, and present ed her with a medal for her story.
 "The Story"
 "Mosquitos were so bad they used to eat up our baby chicks. Then they started tossing down grown ducks, then turkeys.
 When they were full grown, they ate three of our calves and then two of our milk cows. On ly one of those mosquitoes con- tinued to poster us. Yes sir she was a mean one, but she's dead now.
 "She finally decided to tackle old Maudie. That's our mule. I'll be gol darned, when that mos- quito got Maude about half eat en, and about half way down, Maude let loose with both of her hind legs and broke the mosquito's back. Now she's dead
The Nome daily nugget., 1936-12-30
NEGOTIATIONS END STRIKE
 VIRTUALLY AT A STANDSTILL
 TODAY AND COMPASS ENDED
(By The Assoclated Press)

D
 SAN FRANCISCO, Dec. 30, - Negotiations toward ending the sixty-two day maritime strike were virtually at standstill to- day.
 Some sources are expressing the belief that congressional ac- ton will be necessary to settle the dispute.
 The future of conferences be- tween shipowners and all but one of seven striking unions re- mained unsettled. Assistant Sec retary McGrady announced to- day that he plans on returning to Washington, D. c.
 Offshore shipowners tentative ly agreed to confer today with representatives of the radio tel egraphists, after negotiations with two other unions-licensed personnel of officers and engin- eers-had broken down.
 Unions announced the forma- ton of flaw and legislation committee" composed of one re- presentative from each union.
 It was declared by leaders that members of this committee may go" to Washington for the opening of congress.
 H. P. Melinow, adviser to the unions, said he was informed that twelve bills, dealing with the dispute, and related difficult ties, have been prepared for in- troduction in congress.
The Nome daily nugget., 1936-12-30
NO NEWS CONTACT
 KDNAPER MATTSON
 BOY TWELVE HOURS
Twelve Hour Period in Which to Contact Kidnaper Ends With No Apparent Life Interest At
 Mattson Home This Morning
(By The Associated Press) . TACOMA, Dec. 30, The Mat

TACOMA, Dec. 30, The Mat tson home lay dark and silent at 2 am. this morning, at the end of the twelve hour period during which the family friend had indicated the twenty-eight thousand dollar ransom demand was to be paid.
 The friends, who declined that his name be used, said that at seven pm. last night negotia- tions "were definitely under way.
 No cars entered or left the driveway from 10:45 pm. last night until this morning.
 During the night the only signs of life in the home were the two men who spent the en- tire night sitting in a dark room near the front door. They petray ed their presence occasionally by parting the curtains. They were believed to be G-Men.
 An advertisement was inserted in the Seattle Times yesterday Mabel, please give us your ad- dress, Ann". Reliable sources said it was published in an at tempt to establish contact with the kidnaper.
The Nome daily nugget., 1936-12-30
TREATIES ENDED AT
 END YEAR
MAY BEGIN BUILDING
(By The Associated PresS) WASHINGTON, D. C., Dec. 3

" "nollIANo o4N, O. S., DCC' oO, -Momentous decisions of naval construction, and far eastern policy lie ahead of the United States following the termination at midnight tomorrow of the Washington-London Naval Limit ation Treaties.
 Coincident with the lapse in restrictions of size of the worlds fighting fleets for the first time in Is years. these problems be- come uppermost--firSt whether two new battleships are to be added to the American Navy and second what the United Stat es intends to do about fort!fica- tion of her territories in the Pac- fife area.
 The navy's objective is to pre- pare Combat flotilla to full all lotted strength by l942.
 Authoritative sources predict ed that President Roosevelt would lose no time in ordering the construction of two, new, fifty million dollar battleships.
The Nome daily nugget., 1936-12-30

You can save $2.00 by paying for your subscrip- ton for six months in ad- vance for the Nome Daily Nugget. Do it now !
The Nome daily nugget., 1936-12-30
Parade Will be COIOrful

Are you taking advantage of six months paid in ad- vance subscription ?
The Nome daily nugget., 1936-12-30
Inauguration Is To Be Simple
 But Colorful
fBy The Associated Press) WASHINGTON. D. C., Dec. 29

WASHINGTON. D. C., Dec. 29 Plans for "a simple though colorful inauguration" January 20th were approved recently at the White House by President Roosevelt and Vice President John N. Garner.
 Rear Admiral Carey T. Gray son, United States Navy, retired, is chairman of the committee on arrangements for the inaugura- ton. He declared that after the President takes the oath of office at the Capitol plaza, there will be parade on Pennsylvania Ave nue.
 Parade Will be ColOrful
 In the parade will be units of the army, navy, marine corps, West Point cadets, Annapolis mid shipmen and governors of var ious states.
 There will be no inaugural ball because of the Presidential Birth day dances that will be held on January 31.
The Nome daily nugget., 1936-12-30

George karamatic (above), 1e0- pound fuIiback Of Gonzaga, has won
 acclaim as one of the Far Vests best backs in the 1s3S season. He's SO good that Gonzaga fans have dubbed him Automatic" Kara matic. Associated Press PhotcN
The Nome daily nugget., 1936-12-30

Begin the New Year Right Subscribe for The Nugget.
The Washington times., 1936-05-23
Times Dali y Pattern
PATTERN 2644

Let Anne Adams send you
straight through the summer, tri-
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most flattering of all-day frocks.
You'll find feminine appeal in the
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time-saving detail in the unusual
cut of novel yoke and sleeve cut
in one. And here is skirt that
is really kind to your hips! The
slenderizing center panel termi"
mates in two wide pleats. Handy
patch pockets are both useful and
ornamental. Easy for beginners
to make, it takes but little time
and minimum cost to add this
perky model to your summer
wardrobe. You'll want several in
the bright, new prints.
Send FIFTEEN CENTS (15c)
in coins or stamps (coins pre-
ferreO for this Anne Adams pat
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and style number.
BE SURE TO STATE SIZE.
Order your copy of our ANNE
ADAMS SUMMER PATTERN
BOOK TODAY! Learn how to
make cool, smart clothes and
plenty of them-for home wear,
vacations, parties, play in the
sun. See the special designs for
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BOOK FIFTEEN CENTS. PAT
TERN FIFTEEN CENTS.
TWENTY-FIVE CENTS FOR
BOTH, WHEN ORDERED To-
GETHER.
Address orders to The Wash
1ngton Times, Pattern Depart
ment, 243 w. 18th ST., New York,
N. Y.
The Washington times., 1936-05-23
j., Church Announcements
D. +. MINISTERS
WILL CONFER
ON MONDAY

The May meeting of the Wash
ington Ministerial Union will be
held at the New York Avenue Pres.
byterian Church Monday, at II
a. m.
The program will deal with THE
National Preaching Mission" Five
minute addresses will be given by
DR.. Raphael H. Miller, on "The
Purpose of the Mission; DR.. Carl
c. Rasmussen, on THE Meetings
Of the Mission; DR.. w. Angie
Smith on THE Local Organiza.
tion," and DR.. w. L. Darby on
THE Eight-Day Local Preaching
Mission"
Four-day preaching missions will
be held in Is different cities from
September to December. The
Preaching Mission will be held in
Washington November % to Is.
The new officers of the MiniSte'
rial Union are: Rev. Charles En-
ders, president; Rev. Oscar Black,
welder, vice president; Rev
Thomas G. Betschler, secretary;
Rev. walter Wolf, treasurer, and
Rev. c. E. Hawthorne, Rev. Vernon
N. Ridgley and Rev. w. L. Darby,
members Of the executive commit
tee
The Washington times., 1936-05-23
TEXAS PASTOR
PREACHESHERE
TOMORROW

DR.. George P. Horst, minister
of the First Presbyterian Church
Of Wichita Falls, Texas, will be
guest speaker at the New York
Avenue Presbyterian Church to-
morrow. At the morning service,
DR.. Horst will have as his subject
Honey in the Rock" and at the
evening service he will speak on
How Firm a Foundation" DR..
Horst is a member of the general
council of the Presbyterian Church
in the U. S. A. and he was for some
time secretary Of the board Of
national missions in the depart
ment of mems work.
The young people of the church
will meet for tea at o'clock in
the parish hall when the inter-
mediate Christian Endeavor will
be the hosts. Following the tea,
Miss Elsie Spencer will lead the
discussion Of How to Conquer Our
Fears"
DR.. Albert Evans, minister in
charge, will speak on Thursday
evening at 8 o'clock on the subject
Lest We Forget" This will be a
Memorial Day message.
The Washington times., 1936-05-23
Mdssing Of Co|ors
To Be Celebrated

Services at the Washington Ca
thedral will start tomorrow morn
ing with holy communion at 1870
a. m. Rev. Howard C. Robbins, of
New York city, will be guest
speaker at the IL o'clock service.
In the afternoon open air services
will be held in the Cathedral am
phitheater, at which time the
ninth annual service Of the Mass
ing OF the Colors will be held under
the auspices Of the District Of Co.
lumbia Chapter of the Military
Order of the World War. The
Bishop Of Washington will preach
the sermon and a short address
will be made by Rear Admiral H.
G. Hamlet, commandment of the
Coast Guard. The Marine Band
will play from $3.50 to 4:30.
The Washington times., 1936-05-23

You think such a thing is not
possible? It's like this: Each day
you eat a little more food than
you burn up in activity. This ex'
cess may be slight, say only 100
calorieS, such as you would get
in an extra pat Of butter, a tea
spoon of marmalade, or one roll.
It takes only a minute calorie
surplus to change the trend Of
the weight scales. If, through
your food habits, you take 100
calorieS daily in excess Of your
energy needs, you will store three
sixteenths of a pound a week.
This gain is so infinitesimal 1t
seems scarcely worth noticing. But
ounces add up to pounds! At this
slow rate, you will gain three
fourths Of a pound a month-nine
pounds a year-with dangerous
curves ahead. Unless you check
your Galleries, you can easily be
40 pounds above normal weight
by the time you reach 49,. and
that's no exaggeration!
Keeping your weight at normal
does not compel you to diet, but
it does mean that you must mod
crate your eating habits. It is
neither necessary to starve nor
possible to gorge. Develop calorie
Judgment to change your food
habits and balance the calories
against your activity.
Food habits make your figure
what it is, so get accustomed 70
eating three satisfying meals a
day without the fattening trim.
mings. Find the number Of cal.
cries you need for normal weight.
Count calories carefully for q
few weeks, and you will learn to
select by instinct the foods within
your caloric limits. This does not
mean that you must diet to avoid
a weight gain. It is merely an
easy and practical application Of
scientific knowledge.
! In other words, incorporate slim
The Washington times., 1936-05-23

should be devoted to one power.
full overload who occupied q
palatial suite in a local hotel
where he assembled some Of the
worlds finest and rarest first
editions and costly paintings.
Here, every so often there was =
huddle of the minor mob chief
tains. The Big Chiefs apart
ment was 30 stories above the
ground. Swift elevators stop
ped at the floor. But the in
StructiOns to his henchmen al
ways were to get off at the goth
floOr-and walk up 10 flights
.. That kept them humble!
If the "Follies" reopenS-and
press releases hint that will be in
three or four weeks-it won't be
in the Winter Garden I hear, for
no later than yesterday final
plans were completed, converting
the historic house into a theater
cabaret like the French Casino
y. "A word or two about the most
atmospheric night spot in town
the Gay NinetieS. Here the old
timers who were once headllners
have their innings+this is the
place that marked the return OF
the Cherry Sisters to Manhattan
Here John Steel was given his
chance to climb back q. E. Now,
nightly, the chief feature Of en-
tertainment is a ziegfeld caval'
cade in which the entire cast
Joe Howard, Edith Gilbert, the
four boys of the quartet men
toned earlier this week, the two
ministries, Billy Lorraine and Ed
Furman-and others, participate
All the song hits Of past Z1eg'
field hits are sung with one or
Others of the small cast imper'
sonating a star of the past -.
Billy Lorraine as Fannie Brice is
something no one should miss.
S. Jay Kaufman, once the
towns leading Broadway col
umnist, is back from Europe ..
For the first time since the
Hitler regime, he revisited Ber-
lin, invading some of the ia
nous restaurants which in other
years he helped to pOpulariZe in
his columns here There was
no warmth in the welcome this
time. He waited full Is min
utes before a captain finally led
him to a table far in the rear of
the huge room Of one famous
restaurant He waited another
Is minutes before . waiter
would approach him Half an
hour later came bowl of thin
soup with a few crusts of bread
floating on the top By this
time, Kaufman decided he
wasn't wanted in the place
He paid his check and as he
was about to take his departure
remarked to the headwaiter:
"The service is not very good"
.. "The service" said the head
waiter, stiffly, "iSs very gute-tO
people we want here. Perhaps
you understand" s. Jay Kauf-
man recalled then that con-
ditionS in Germany had changed
as records certain people.
The Washington times., 1936-05-23
Soul and Body Topic
In Science Churches

"Soul and Body" is the subject
Of the leSson-sermon in all the
Churches of Christ, Scientist, to.
morrow. The text is from I Peter
all: Dearly beloved, beseech
you as strangers and pilgrims, alb
stain from fleshly lusts, which war
against the SOUL" Among the cita.
tons which comprise the lesson.
sermon is the following from the
Bible: And ye are complete in
Him, which is the head of all prin'
cipality and power" (Colossians
2:10. The lesson-sermon also in.
cludes a passage from the Chris,
tan Science textbook, Science
and Health with Key to the Scrip,
lures" by Mary Baker Eddy.
The Washington times., 1936-05-23
THE WASHINGTON TIMES, SATURDAY, MAY 49, 1886

BY MILTON A. BOSLEY, d. v. M.
If dogs had the authority to pre-
vent 1t, the Fourth Of July blow
outs and backfireS would be abol-
iShed, because of the firing Of fire
crackers or other sounds which
prove terrifying to them.
This natural fright should be
distinguished clearly from true
shyness and cowardice. Most dogs
are frightened by sudden, unknown
sounds Just as is the case with
you and me. 1t is not only a
canine instinct, but may be aSSo-
ciated with humans just as well.
AS a matter of fact, this is true
with all manner Of animal life;
birds, for instance, will hurry to
fly upon hearing the sound Of a
distant shotgun or even q thunder
storm.
Noisy Dog Is Nuisance
The noisy dog, however, may
prove to be a nuisance not only
by law but because he is a con-
slant annoyance to the neighbor-
hood in which you live. Also, it
may be stated, he reveals lack OF
training on the part Of his owner
and is a discredit to his so-called
master. This Is not difficult to
explain-he simply has failed to
learn obedience.
A dog should bark, for it Is the
only means of expressing himself
and stating to you dangers on the
front porch or "just around the
corner" It may, Of course, be
true that there will be one barker
in an entire litter which will start
the whole chorus singing. This
canine CaruSo or Jenny Lind
should be removed and special
attention given it.
"Debarking operations" usually
consist in teaching the owner, anc
not the dog. When a dog in 6
kennel banks at unusual hours
during the night or day, a sudden
unusual noise against the walls
of his habitat will ordinarily stor
his barking.
If this remedy does not prove
to be a practical cure, chronic
offenders should be muzZlec
tightly enough so that they can
not bark. Experience has taught
me that most animals will connect
this unpleasant muzzling with the
barking and will therefore diScon
tinue the howls which will make
your neighbors want to call bott
you and the police.
The Washington times., 1936-05-23
BLACKWELDER
T0END SERIES

Tomorrow morning at the
Lutheran Church Of the Reforma-
ton, DR.. Oscar F. Blackwelder,
pastor, will speak on 1.-THE Ascen-
sion of Christ" At the 8 o'clock
service, DR.. Blackwelder will con-
clude his series Of Where Cross
the Crowded Ways of Life" using
for his theme Jesus and Modern
Youth" A musical prelude opens
at 7:45 o'clock with w. Fred
Pfeiffer, violiniSt. T he senior and
intermediate Luther Leagues will
join the leagues in the District
of Columbia in an annual devo-
tional service at S p. m. at st.
Johns Lutheran Church, East
Riverdale, Md, at which Rev.
George Grewenow of Faith
Lutheran Church, Va, will speak.