Evening star., 1936-04-21
INSTALLMENT XIV.

rosary ratified as she made a quick
movement of her thin. fine hands.
"Deliver us from evil.'" she quoted,
half to herself. That's what being
told to avoid the occasions of evil
means. Tam. That's where the trouble
always begins"
But. Mother-I know how bad it
was" Tam faltered eagerly. as the
serious eyes were lifted to hers
thoughtfully for a moment. But other
women-women l know-get away with
It! Some of them seem to be able to
do anything they like, and nobody
cares!"
How do you mean get away with
it'?' asked the nun.
well, they do"
There is no such thing as getting
away with what is wrong" Mother
Laurence said dispassionately. Your
feelings are your judge, Tamara. BY
getting away with it do you mean re-
ducing yourself to the state when you
neither know right from wrong nor
care what you do?"
why should one thing be right and
another wrong, If it hurts no one but
yourself?" Tam demanded. trying to
remember some of the arguments the
group at Persis' table had sometimes
used so easily. arguments not making
acts right or wrong so much as deny
ing the existence of either right or
wrong entirely.
IT don't know" said Mother Lau-
of
one or two or three apparently harm
less acts bring us a harvest of bitter
regret and shame. then it seems to
me only common sense to decide that
there is something unwise in those
acts"
Yes, but why should there be?"
Tam persisted miserably. The nun
looked at her thoughtfully.
Perhaps because we have some
tribunal within ourselves" she said.
Even quite small children know
when they have done something
against the law; even animals do
sometimes. You left me a happy,
brilliant, good child, Tamara, two
years ago. What have you done to
yourself. il there is no wrong in it?
Why are you so unhappy"
Because life is so unfair to wom-
en-" Tam said somberly. Because
for something you did without think
ing-without meaning any harm
you-you find yourself-miserable-
She began to cry again as she
spoke; the soaked handkerchief was
wholly inadequate now her finger
tips we're wet and tears fell on her
blouse.
Il am so sorry. Tamara." Mother
Laurence said. 1T has been shock
a severe shock to me. Your mother
no, she would not be able to help us
now. And your sister-your brother
you wrote me that hey are not the
sort that It is all too bad. Ia
mara, if had not happened to meet
you today, would you have come to
see me?"
Il don't think so," Tamara said
ITO whom would you have gomez"
"I don't know"
I'VE must think this out" said the
nun, pondering.
II don't know why you should
bother about it, Mother" Tamara
presently said sullenly, with a forlorn
attempt to recover something of her
pride. Il feel like a terrible baby.
coming to you. It'll work out-some-
thing will turn up-Ill-I'll do some
thing"
How old are you?" Mother Lau-
renee asked with glance.
"Twenty-one, nearly"
'Twenty-one!"
Il meant" Tamara faltered, her
lips trembling again-"I meant my
life to be so different? I tried; l
did try. I worked at home and I
gave them all my money: I went
e. rywhere to see II I could get
part! Nobody-nobody helped me.
It's all my fault, I know that! But
If I'd had home-some place to
bring the men I liked. friends-fam-
lily friends and some one-some one
TO talk to-"
She was still. After moment she
added in steadier voice:
But I kneW-all girls know It's
never because of-of not knowing"
Il think I have an idea" Mother
Laurence said in the pause. She
sighed and raised her reflective look
to Tamara's face. She saw the girls
thinness and pallor, her already alter
ing figure, the shabbiness of her dress,
the white young face marked with
tears. Il think I know what we can
do she added "Tamara, when all
ic nj
will you promise me to come and see
me every few weeks?"
How can it ever be over?" the girl
demanded duly. "One can't 90 back
OF this kind of thing"
I'VE never know. We can always
be sorry and start again." the older
woman said simply.
"Oh, sorry!" the girl said. And she
slipped to her knees and buried her
wet face and tumbled hair against
the nuns knee. Mother Laurence
laid thin, gentle hand upon her
head
The Hutton place was more than
q mile from Belmont station: Tam
walked 1t. She carried the smaller
suitcase; the heavy one she had left
at the checking counter: after all, she
knew nothing of her destination; it
might be as well not to burn her
bridges behind her.
The Summer afternoon was very
lovely and very still. The road led
west toward the hills-an old dirt
road under shaggy eucalyptus trees.
whose sickles carpeted the ground. and
whose aromatic breath stole through
the warm sweetness of the afternoon
like balm.
gate marked Oak Dell" hung
struggling in a long line of picket
fencing. The pickets were old and
had not been whitewashed for years.
Their dirty gray well matched the gen.
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