davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1936-01-22
The Greatest Show On Earth
By John Snure, T.

} country on which the American
flag flies every day in the year.
According to Capitol Architect
David A. Lynn, the practice
started in the days of the World
War and has continued ever since.
In addition, there are nights
when the flag is allowed to remain
aloft.
When the Senate or House are
recessed and not in adjournment,
then the flag remains at the
masthead.
That was the explanation by
Lynn as to why the flags we're al,
lowed to remain flying at night
in a recent blizzard and were
torn by the high winds.
IN DEMAND
There is said to be a mystery
at the Capitol concerning the dis
appearance of House and Senate
calendars.
Reports are that the calendars
for 1886 which are now being
mailed to constituents of mem
bers of Congress are disappearing
between the Capitol and their des-
tinations.
One person who mailed 10 of
the calendars contends only two
reached the persons to whom they
were mailed.
Apofhar 1arco,, yoooilad mo nf
the calendars to himself to test
the report the documents were
disappearing.
He didn't get it.
An investigation by Postmaster
General James A. Farley is sug'
geSted.
IN OTHER WORDS
Senator Mathew M. Nicely CD
of West Virginia has a new way OF
expressing himself on the evils OF
increasing interest on borrowed
monies.
Speaking on the bonus and
methods of payment, Senator
Nicely declared:
Every day and every night,
every hour and every minute,
every second and every heart
beat, through winters storm and
summers calm, the merciIeSS
monster of interest is gnawing
at the vitals of every man and
woman and child in this re-
public"
He had started the speech with
the quotation:
eff it were done, when its done,
then twere we'll
eff it were done quickly"
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1936-01-22
EXPLAINED

The Capitol of the United
States is the only building in this
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1936-01-22

Of few men can it be said truly, as it may be
King George that there is not blot upon his nj
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1936-01-22

He knew that the real and only rulers of England
are the PEOPLE OF ENGLAND, that the Kings task
is to execute their will which is the absolute ruling
power throughout the empire.
The Coolidge examiner., 1936-01-17

3-Most of them had been states
men.
4-They sent him to the best
schools and then to a university
where he would get the democratic
touch.
5-They never ceased emphasizing
that in the United States every boy
had chance to become President,
and they liked to impress upon
him that his chances were better
than average.
6-Their idea was that he should
get a broad education and then en-
ter the Law. Most Presidents came
from the Law, they said.
He inherited certain states
manlike instincts and the ability
to mix we'll on necessary occasions.
S-After graduation he went into
politics and his folks saw that he
had the right sponsors.
9-He was soon looked upon as
a rising young man in the affairs of
the state and won state senator
ship in no time.
10-Everybody liked Oscar. He
had a way with him.
11-After few years he be-
came governor and served with dis
tinction and the attendant pub
licity.
12-Then they began to talk of
him as a favOrite son.
13-He looked like a cinch for
the White House.
14-Then came the 1929 collapse
and chaos. Oscar observed the trou-
bles of President with a consider
able cooling of his ambitions.
15-But the party went on boom
ing him until there seemed no way
out.
16-Oscar fooled them, however.
17-He suddenly quit the state
and became a professional tester
of experimental parachutes over the
Grand Canyon.
Isle left note saying that
he figured it was less strain and
worry.
MORAL-NOw and then you find
a man who can sidetrack an ambi-
tion.
The Coolidge examiner., 1936-01-17
Skeletons in Armor Suits
Are Found on Battle Site

Skeletons fully arrayed in medieval
armor have been found in excava-
tlons in the vicinity of Venice, all in
perfect state of preservation. Work
ers engaged on excavations for the
new great canal which is under con-
struction in the picturesque district
surrounding Stra, came across what
undoubtedly must have been the
scene of a great battle in the days
of the ancient Venetian republic.
One of the many skeletons in ar
NOR was found to have a sword still
between the ribs. Presumably the
man fell in battle and has lain undis-
turbed all these centuries. Quanti-
ties of ancient weapons and armor
also were found, together with beau
tifully modelled vases which, when
the centuries old dirt had been
washed away, were found to be paint
ed by hand with designs and figures,
the colors being perfectly preserved.
The Coolidge examiner., 1936-01-17
{ Edited BY H. I. PHILLIPS@

What have we here?
We have an automobile.
How big is the automobile?
1t is a four-passenger automobile.
How many people are in the au-
tomObile?
Eight people and dog.
How can eight people and a dog
get into four-paSSenger autOmo-
bile?
We've often wondered about that,
too.
Are the people comfortable?
Certainly not. Even the dog is
suffering.
Where are they going?
They are going to the country or
shore on the regular Sunday mo-
Tor trip.
How long will it take them?
They will be all day getting there
and all night getting back.
Why?
On account Of traffic congestion.
viii they enjoy the outing?
No, in fact they will be pretty
miserable every moment, and about
midday the suffering will have be-
come pronounced.
Then why do they take this trip
every Sunday?
It's an American custom.
The Coolidge examiner., 1936-01-17

THIS is a mystic prediction. The
L. magician writes something on
slip of paper which he seals in an
envelope. A person is asked to
write a number of three tigures-all
figures different. For instance, 1913.
The magician does not see the
number. He merely tells the person
to reverse it and subtract the small
er from the larger. Example: 1913,
reversed. is 391. The subtraction
leaves 1913.
That, too, is kept from the wizard.
He says to reverse the result and
add. And 1913, reversed, is S91. The
two, added, produce 1889. The en-
velope is opened. On the paper is
the number 1889.
Whatever the original number
used, the final total viii be 1889.
That is the secret of the trick. One
point: always mention that a zero
must be placed in front if the SUBJ
traction brings a two-fgure number.
Thus, 90 (Which sometimes arrives)
is treated as 099. Reversed, it is
900.
The Coolidge examiner., 1936-01-17
FRUIT SOUPS

COCKTAILS are more popular as
~ a fruit beginner for the dinner
than soups, though in Europe the
soups are enjoyed by prince and
peasant, summer or winter; chilled
with shaved ice they make a most
nourishing dish. With fruit soups
the nourishment depends upon the
ingredients used, as with other
soups. Prunes, raiSins, figs, ba-
nanas, persimmons and pawpaws
have more food value in themselves,
though lacking in other things.
With the addition of stock, milk and
egg, the food value is increased.
Dried or canned fruits are used as
we'll as the fresh fruits.
The Coolidge examiner., 1936-01-17
OUR FEATHERED FRIENDS
The Robin

The robin is harbinger OF
spring, but you can get influenza
through trusting it too implicitly.
1t comes north in early April
and people who have been sitting
around in heavy underwear waiting
for it promptly get into lighter
weight apparel and begin rakinG
the lawn, planting flower seeds and
developing a cold in the head.
No bird has been responsible for
more pneumonia.
The female robin has a duller
coat than the male, which has a
very red breast, or maybe it is vice
versa.
Anyhow, most of the poetry is
written about the one with the
red breast.
The robin stays north all sum-
mer and makes life miserable for
worms.
1t goes south in time to escape
the first biting blasts of winter.
All things considered, it leads 3
swell life.
The Coolidge examiner., 1936-01-17
WHAT'S WRONG WITH
THESE SENTENCES?

THE gas company made a mis-
take and read the meter so that the
customer benefited.
2-The middle-aged lady passen-
ger on the ocean voyage did not
make fuss about the location of
her steamer chair or ask which side
of the boat was the sunny side.
3-"We can't use a skit like
that" said the musical show pro
ducer. "It is too suggestive"
1.-The newspaper editor refused
to print another picture of Al
CapOne, saying, I'VE have used him
enough"
5-"You're right" said the base
The Coolidge examiner., 1936-01-17
Apple and Rice Soup.

Core and slice thin eight unpeeled
apples. Cook them with one-half
cupful of rice until both are soft,
using two quarts of boiling water.
Put through sieve, add spices
and one-half cupful of orange juice
or grapefruit marmalade. Serve hot.
A very appetiZing salad may be
made by stuffing well pumped and
stewed prunes with cream cheese
and finely minced celery. Serve on
lettuce with spoonful of french
dressing, or any other kind preferred.
The Coolidge examiner., 1936-01-17
Beware Coughs
from common colds
That Hang On

No matter how many medicines
YOU have tried for your cough, chest
cold or bronchial irritation, you can
get relief now with CreomulSion.
Serious trouble may be brewing and
YOU cannot afford to take chance
with anything less than Creomul-
sion. which goes right to the seat
of the trouble to aid nature to
Soothe and heal the infamed mem
branes as the germ-laden phlegm
is loosened and expelled.
Even if other remedies have
failed, don't be discouraged, your
druggist is authorized to guarantee
Creomulsion and to refund your
money if you are not satisfied with
results from the very first bottle.
Get Creomulsion right now. (Adv.)
The Coolidge examiner., 1936-01-17
MONDAY MORNING
BY DOUGLAS MALLOCH
MONDAY morning back to school,

MONDAY morning back to school
A'A When a Sundays over.
Though I'd rather, as a rule,
Stay and play with Rover.
But we need it when we're men
CHATS my mothers warning),
SO it's back to school again
Ev'ry Monday morning.
Monday morning 1 must go
Back to school to study,
But l hardly mind it. though
SO do Bill and Buddy.
There's a great big yard to run,
Where you play and shout it;
School is quite a lot of fun,
When you think about it.
Monday, once upon a time,
was kept from going.
Well, you think a things a crime
Without ever knowing
How you'll miss it, as a rule,
Taken without warning,
How you'll miss it-even school
On a Monday morning.
g Douglas Malloch.-WNU Service.
The Coolidge examiner., 1936-01-17
THE HUNTER is
DISAPPOINTED

HOW he knew he was safe,
IA LightfOot the Deer couldn't
have told you. He just knew it,
that was all. He couldn't under
stand a word said by the man in
whose yard he found himself when
he climbed the bank after his long
swim across the Big River. But
he didn't have to understand words
TO know that he had found a
friend. SO he allowed the man to
gently drive him over to an open
shed where there was a pile of soft
The Coolidge examiner., 1936-01-17
s ,Sz@B BEDT!ME sT0RY y, &,
&ENOBy THORNTON w. BURGESSSzAS

luck at ALL" said Lightfoots friend
"You see, | don't allow any hunt
ing on my land"
The hunter looked surprised, and
then his surprise gave way to an
ger You mean," said he, that you
intend to get that deer yourself"
LightfoOt's friend shook his head
NO" said he, Il don't mean any
thing of the kind. / mean that that
deer is not to be killed if 1 can pre-
vent it, and while he is on my land,
I think I can. The best thing for
you to do, my friend, is to get into
your boat and row back where you
came from. Are those your hounds
barking over there?"
NO." replied the hunter prompt
ly. Il know the law just as we'll as
you do, and it is against the law to
hunt deer with dogs. l don't even
know who owns those two hounds
over there"
THAT may be true" replied Light
foot's friend. 81 don't doubt it is
true. But you are willing to take
advantage of the fact that some one
else's dogs have broken the law.
You knew that those dogs had driv-
en- that deer into the Big River, and
you promptly took advantage of the
fact to try to reach that deer before
he could get across. You are not
hunting for the pleasure of hunting
but just to kill. You don't know
the meaning of justice or fairness.
Now get off my land! Get back into
your boat and off my land as quick
The Coolidge examiner., 1936-01-17
Prune and Peach Soup.

Take one-third of a pound Of
dried prunes and twO-thirds Of a
pound of dried peaches, soak over
night. In the morning add a pint
of cold water and cook to the boil
ing point, then add two tablespoon
fuls of sago; cook until the sago is
clear. Add cupful of cherry, cram
berry or other tart juice and serve
either hot or cold.
G Western Newspaper Union.
The Coolidge examiner., 1936-01-17

u ne 7unter Looked surprised and
Then His Surprise Gave Way to
Anger.
hay, and there he lay down, so tired
that it seemed to him he couldn't
move another step.
1t was only few minutes later
that the hunter who had followed
LightfoOt across the river reached
the bank and scrambled out of the
boat. Lightfoot's friend was wait
ing just at the top of the bank.
OF course the hunter saw him at
once.
Hello, friend - cried the hunter.
'Did you see a deer pass this way
a few minutes ago? He swan
across the river, and if I know any
thing about it he's too tired to
travel far now. I've been hunting
that fellow several days, and if /
have any luck at all l ought to get
him this time"
I'm afraid you won't have any
The Coolidge examiner., 1936-01-17
Strawberry and Orange Soup.

Sprinkle a pint of strawberries
with sugar and let stand on ice
for one hour. Make a sirup of one
and one-half quarts Of water and
a pound of sugar, cook for ten min
utes, add a quart of fresh berries
with the juice of one lemon. Mash
and strain, adding a cupful of or
ange juice with the berries, which
have been iced. Serve cold.
The Coolidge examiner., 1936-01-17
1t altUays vorks

Just do what hospitals do, and the
doctors insist on. Use a good liquid
laxative, and aid Nature to restore
clocklike regularity without strain or
Ill effect.
A liquid can always be taken in
gradually reduced doses. Reduced
dosage is the real secret Of relief from
constipation.
Ask doctor about this. Ask your
druggist how very popular DR.. Cald-
wells Syrup Pepsin has become. 1t
gives the right kind of help, and right
amount of help. Taking a little less
each time, gives the bowels chance
to act of their own accord, until they
are moving regularly and thoroughly
without any help at all.
DR.. Caldwell's Syrup Pepsin con-
tains senna and cascara-both natural
laxatives that form no habit. The ac-
ton is gentle, but sure. 1t will relieve
any sluggishness or bilious condition
due to constipation without upset.
The Coolidge examiner., 1936-01-17
Is Billions Is Economic
Value of Thomas Edison

The economic value of Thomas Edi-
son, or the value of the equipment
and devices which have been made
from his patents, is estimated at $15,-
OOO0O0,000.
This means that from the time of
his first patent in 1864 up to the pres
ent he has been responsible for the
production of nearly 100000 worth
OF property every "A hours.-Collier's
The Coolidge examiner., 1936-01-17
Fancy CarameIs.

Put two cupfuls of sugar, one
cupful of brown sugar, one cup
full of corn sirup, one cupful Of
cream, two cupfuls of milk, one-half
cupful of butter in a saucepan and
cook and stir until the candy forms
a soft ball when tested in cold wa
ter-246 degrees f. Add one pack
age of dates sliced, and two tea
spoonfuls of vanilla and turn at
once into lightly creased pans.
When cold remove from the pans
and cut into squares with a hot
The Coolidge examiner., 1936-01-17

ly as you can! That deer is not
very far from here and so tired that
he cannot move. Just as long as he
will stay here, he will be safe, and
I hope he will stay until this miser-
able hunting season is ended. Now
gor"
Muttering angrily, the hunter got
back into his boat and pushed off.
But he didn't row back across the
Big River.
OF. w. Burgess.-WNU Service.
The Coolidge examiner., 1936-01-17

ball umpire when the pitcher dis
puted him.
6-The man who had planted his
8 lawn with grass seed had no trOu-
bic at all keeping the neighbOrs'
dogs, chickens and children off.
Z The speakeasy proprietor
showed great alarm when told that
police were in the neighborhOod.
The Coolidge examiner., 1936-01-17
HEALTH RHYMES

Masticate each mOuthful well,
Never Overeat;
Always wear your rubbers in
Snow or rain or sleet!
Brush your teeth quite carefully,
Don't neglect your sleep;
And in anything you do
Look before you leap!
Watch your calOrieS and don't
Strain or hurt your eyes;
Bear in mind that you must have
Abundant exercise!
Guard your health from morn t.
night
Ger your diet fuss;
And you'll probably expire
Underneath a bus,
The Coolidge examiner., 1936-01-17
THE STORY OF OSCAR

Oscars par
ents had great
ambitions for the
boy.
2-W h en- he
was a little fel-
low they used
to take hi m
a r o u n d t he
house and point
out the oil paint
ings of his an
ceStOrS.
The Coolidge examiner., 1936-01-17
BEFORE baby COMES
Elimination Of Body Waste
Is Doubly lmporfcnt

In the crucial months before baby arrives
it is vitality important that the body be rid
of waste matter. four intestines must func-
tion-regularly, completely without gripping.
The Coolidge examiner., 1936-01-17
Why Physicians Recommend
MiInesiu Wufers

These mint-havored, candy-like waters are
pure milk of magnesia in solid form
much pleasanter to take than liquid. Each
wafer is approximately equal to full adult
dose ofliquid milk of magnesia. Chewed
thoroughly, then swallowed, they correct
acidity in the mouth and throughout the
digestive system, and insure regular, COM
plete elimination without pain or effort.
Milnesia Waters come in bottles of20 and
48, at 35c and 60c respectively, and in
convenient tins for your handbag contain
ing II at Zoe. Each wafer is approximately
one adult dose of milk of magnesia. All
good drug stores sell andrecommend them.
Start using these delicious, effective
anti-acid, gently laxative waters today
Professional samples sent free to registered
physicians or dentists if request is made
on professional letterhead. Select Products.
Inc, 44o2 23rd ST., Long Island City, N. Y.
The Coolidge examiner., 1936-01-17
CURIOUS FACTS FOR
CURIOUS PEOPLE

The happiest people in the world
are members of a tribe in the in
terror of Africa. They have never
heard of contract bridge.
Ninety-seven per cent of all au-
tomObile owners never talk about
testing the air in the spare tire I'M
til they have a blowout nine miles
from nowhere.
The average life of a sponge
diver is 35,67S1a dives.
Statisticians have figured that
less than u of l per cent of all
men who go founder fishing do so
because they like it. They merely
find it good way to get away from
their wives.
George D. Phillersby, of Gadget-
vile, Mont, has fountain pen
which has never failed him.
The ancient Greeks did not know
what strawberry shortcake was.
which may account for their phySi-
cal fitness.
A straw hat blown off in a wind
will roll under a truck in seven out
of ten cases.
Watch fObs are gradually disap-
pearing from American life. This
is also true of buggy whips.
The idea of making a cruller with
a hole in the center was thought
up by a man named POoksey.
The Coolidge examiner., 1936-01-17

Thought Is Father
If a man thinks he is catching cold
in a draught, he will.
The Coolidge examiner., 1936-01-17
SCRAMBLED LETTERS TEST

The names of what leaders in
American politics are spelled If
the following letters are correctly
The Coolidge examiner., 1936-01-17
Nj OF HERS +:
BOOK

knife. Wrap each in waxed pa.
per. This recipe will make two
and one-half pounds.
The Coolidge examiner., 1936-01-17

ted. Note.-Any normal person
should be able to figure these out
in approximately four days, with
favorable windS.)
The Coolidge examiner., 1936-01-17

The average life of a sponge
diver is 35,67S15 dives.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1936-01-31

CHICAGO, Jan. 81 Q.N.s).-Hogs-
Receipts, 1000; market 1880 higher:
holdovers, 5000. Top. &1O.15; bulk,
$9.9O@1O2O; mediums, $1O@1O.25; lights
$1O@1O.25; light lights, 1915 @1O.1O;
packing sows SsQs.5O; pigs, $S.5O@s.75.
Cattle-Receipts, $500; market steady.
Calves 500; market steady. Beef steers:
Good and choice. &12@145O; common
and medium, &7@12; yearings, $500
10. Butcher cattle: Heifers $591O.5o;
cows, $5@7.5O; bulls, sos; calves, $50
12; feeder steers sos; stocker cows
and heifers, $4Q7.25.
Sheep-Reoeipts, 5000; market steady.
Medium and choice lambs. 500 1913;
culls and common, $5@9.50; yearlngs,
/S76975; common and choice ewes, $3.50
95; feeder lambs. Ss@10.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1936-01-31
AYTXT Gov. Landon Says that the
- "A ~ n Greatest Reform We Could
NAA "A ' - - Have Is Business Recovery
BY LEWIS HANEY

Professor of Economics New York University
Governor Landons speech deserves careful attention. not
ny because he being considered presidential candidate
lu because of what he To BEGIN with he strikes well
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1936-01-31
Washington Stocks

SALES
Anacostia and Potomac R. r.
IS, $1,0O0@82A.
Mergenthaler Linotype, 1O@47,
10@47.
AFTER CALL
Riggs Banks COM, 2@340.
Capital Transit Company, 81
@13.
American Security and Trust,
1928.
Capital Traction SIS, $5O0@91A.
Potomac Electric SO pfd, 10
@111h.
Capital Transit Company, 100
1874, 10@13A.
Public Utility Bonds Bid Asked
Amer Tel & Tel 4As....,.. I1O7h 900.
Am Tel & Tel col tr 5s...... 10S 1870.
Anacostia & Pot IS ....... 50 IS
Ana & Pot Guar 5s.......... los ....
C & P Tel Of Va IS .....l105 .....
Cap Traction r 5s....... 81 92h
City & Suburban 5s.......... So 80
Georgetown Gas list IS. .....113 l.....
Pot Elec Pow Cons 6s -. l101 500.
Potomac Flee se... ......I1O5 u .....
Wash Gas 5s 195s...........1 los .....
Washington Gas IS 1860. ... 1I6A .....
Wash Gas SIS series B....... 1O1% .....
Wash Rwy & Elec 4s...... l106 Y .....
Miscellaneous Bonds
fBarbsr & ROSS Inc 6As III 20 -.
Chevy Chase Club 5hs -. 1854 .....
Col Country Club 5s....... 100 800.
W NJ Cold Storage 5s.. SO -.
Public Utility stocks
Amer Tel & Tel (9)r.......I16oNI.::..
bcapitaI Transit Co 81 e. - IL
Pot Elec Pow IS pfd o.. III -.
Pot FL Pwr 5hs pr (5.50).... 11Sh 116
wash Gas 1t Co (3.60) E. 10 .....
Wash Ry Ell Co G2) $50 $50.
Wash Ry & Ell pfd lilo H..
National Bank Stocks
Capital a. ,..............i11 5 80.
Liberty az ................ 90
Lincoln (6.25) ............ 1875 25S
Riggs ..:;............. 233 $50
"Rigg& ptd co. loS l..i,
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1936-01-31
Chicago Livestock

"Ex Dividend $50 Cents Extra.
(fFlat.) books closed.
Evening star., 1936-02-10

Now it can be told that the Federal
Government did not permit J. p. Nor
gan and his associates to be lonesome
during their vacation on the Senate
inquisitorial rack. Wherever they
went, while they were under Senate
subpoena. they were accompanied by
United States secret service men.
Two were ace bodyguards, who for
merly protected the President.
This was not only irregular, but
technically illegal. The United States
secret service Is empowered only to
guard the President and his family.
Never before were they assigned to
guard O private citizen.
The secret service will probably deny
it, but the explanation Is that the
Government had reason to believe a
physical attack might be made on
Morgan and his associates. Certain
overweight people are supposed to
have written crank letters. The Gov
ernment could not afford to let any
thing happen to Morgan while he was
in its custody.
An increase in crank mail has been
noted lately by several offlcials, prob.
ably rs result Of expanding political
tension.
tcopyrisht, Ie36)