The Kennewick courier-reporter. [volume] (Kennewick, Wash.) 1914-1938, 1936-08-06
WHO'S WHO?

f.
= Who likes TO camp In mor.
tains high, and is the place -.
clothes TO buy? Whose stora
+ modern as can be-moSt s,,s
+ ish buds you ever seep whs
wife sells the ladies wear ans
+ pretty costumes come frns
+ therep For shoes and soy
coats and suits, you should flrs,
see this man Glenn Utz
+
<+*+++++$$s..s
Definition
OPT1MIST-The voter who A.
mands Coolidge economy Hoover ~
ficiency and Roosevelt relief - w.
~ ~ ~
One thing about this b,,,
ness of spending ourselves on,
of the depression-it win nro'
vide a neyer-ending TOMB AZ
conversation as we sic ON Inc
poOrhouse porch.
~ - 80
But then, even a tombstone ,,p
say something good about a fellow %S
when he's down.
~ ~ ~
Dad Gummit saws he won
just one argument with his
wife. That was 20 wears ago
when she was laying Garnet ana
had her mouth full of tacks
" ~ ~
Dad says the after-dinner nan
is his fayorite hour of the dav.
His wife is the one who takes Inc
nap.
~ ~ y
Mandy: "Ah wants fob to 500
Doctah Hassenpfeffer.n
Office Girl: ''I'm sorry, the doc.
tor is engaged"
Mandy: GO long, honey. All
doesn't want to marry him. Tel
him his wash lady wants huh
money"
~ ~
For insomnia, take glass
of wine at regular intervals"
the doctor told his patient III
won't make you sleep, but ZEN
make you satisfied to stay
awake"
- ~ -
Bert Plowman got such q reputa.
ton for stretching the truth IN re-
gard to his fish, that he bought a
pair Of scales and insisted on weigh
ing every fish he caught, In The
presence OF a witness. One day On.
Spaulding borrowed the scales 10
weigh a newborn baby. The baby
weighed ~ pounds.
~ ~ ~
The Fisherman
Who's the stranger, mother dear?
Look, he knows us, amt he quecri
Hush, my child, don't talk 80 wild;
He's your father, dearest child.
He's my father? No such thinsl
Father died away last spring.
Father didn't die, you dub,
Father Joined the fishing club.
But now the seasons closed, 20 he
Has no place TO 60, you see;
No place left for him TO roam;
That's why Daddy's coming home
kiss him-he won't bite you child
All those fishing guys look via
- - -
Percy Whiffletree says his sons
average income is between ESQ ano
- - y
Definition
CLASSICS-Books. Also per-
fectly safe place to hide something
you don't want the family to read.
- - y
"Are you a college man?"
"No, q horse stepped on my hat
- - -
There Is not enough nour-
ishment In a frankfurter fE
two people, says the economist
The frankfurter is q one-msn
dog.
- - y
Definition
OLD TIMER-One who can ~
member away back when Pre1
dent Roosevelt criticized Hoover iu
governmental extravaganza.
- - y
MANY a woman,s idea Of ECONOMY
says Dad Gummit-is to oeclu
that her husband doesn't neeo wy
new clothes.
- - -
THE ENGLIsHMAN went ben
and spent a fortune on hair res.o arS
THE SCOTCEMAN went Daio wv
sold his brush and comb.
- - y
III the shoe fits, just put
on hubby's charge account
- - -
do I bore YOU" asked the nv
squito politely, as he sank y WV
shaft into the mans leg. In
"Not at ALI" replied the H. ~,
smashing the mosquito gentiy I'm ~,
the head with a book. "Ano py '"
way, how do strike your
- - y
This Often Works 49,,
Wife: "Mrs. Jones has sn
new hat" Al.
Hubby: "WeIl, IL she were ne
tractive as you are, my &C. ,,ueh
wouldn't have 10 depend 80
upon the milliner.'
x,yxrr M