Evening star., 1936-06-17
the Occidental Vegetable Kingdom Has New Jack of All Trades
AdOleScent
Needs Right
Handling
And Tactful Guid-
ance During First
Teen-Age Years.
BY ANGELO PATRI.

O4 <A4N0GA%S = 1A 4sAs
"A DOLESCENT boys and girls are
very sensitive about the things
that concern them closely. Their
personalities are very new and con-
sequently easily bruised. A too direct
word will make them finch and go
to cover When you feel that there
Is something that needs saying, try
to say 1t as indirectly, as imperson-
ally as possible. If you say it with
blunt directness, you will drive the
child into himself and frighten him
so that he will avoid you In the
future. That is why many adolescent
children keep secrets that might better
be told.
The first gestures toward the op-
posite sex are not always admirable,
but be careful. Never speak directly
and bluntly about the apparent in
terest in a particular boy or girl.
Take it as you might the weather,
as it comes. Know that the chances
are strongly in favor of this interest
passing and another coming in its
stead.
Bring in other boys and girls, in
eluding the one Of strongest appeal
at the time. There are more ways Of
killing cat than by choking him with
butter, but that is one very good way.
At this time give the boy or girl
some interesting books dealing with
their special problems-"Alice Adams"
Seventeen" THE Right Thing" But
supply no maps with them and refrain
from any other form Of accent. Be
casual, be calm.
Never ridicule an adolescent child
because he tried to do something
and did not succeed. If he tries to
dance and bruises his own ankles, gets
in everybody's way, it is all right with
you. If he says anything you can
tell him that everybody has to learn
to think with his feet, because up to
the time he begins to dance he has
used mainly his head and hands
for that purpose. Take his vagaries
good-humoredly, as far as you can,
and, above all, don't tell him what
you think too often. He will change
by tomorrow and you will have to
change your mind. Save the energy.
When you have to blush for some
childish indiscretion or other. re-
frain from expressing your shame and
Indignation directly, and upon the
heels Of the offense. Wait a little. Go
gently. If the child is intelligent and
has been subjected to the usual forces
of good breeding he very likely knows
that he made mistake, and is suf-
fering secretly because he made it.
So don't say, In tones of evaporation,
why did you sit down in Mrs. Old
mans chair and leave her standing in
the middle Of the floor like that?
Haven't you any sense at alp" Like
wise, don't say, "If you couldn't tell
story without balling it up and stam-
mering and suffering over it, would
keep still. I thought I should die
while you were trying to get out that
story about the Scotchman and the
smoke. And Mrs. MacTavish is
Scotch, If that has escaped your OBJ
servation."
The only effect that sort of treat
ment has is to increase the adoles-
cents fear Of his ability to manage
himself in the presence Of others.
He must have time and plenty of
encouragement in order to be at home
among strangers. He must have ex-
perience in order to know true values.
He must have understanding help to
get over his difficulties. That help
is best given tactfully, indirectly, and
impersonally.
Copyright. 193o)