The Waterbury Democrat., 1936-05-26

the l030 -37 |" ""'E"''cH budget to Q client. The client thereupon proceeded to insure himself against the increase with the result that there ensued Q terrific to-do in London and MT. Thomas was permitted to resign" There was no proof that the CO., lonial secretary had been guilty of
 anything worse than taking in , the intimacy of the family circle about something which tradition insists must remain @ perfectly kept secret until 1t is made pubs lie. property. But there were ate tendant implications which made MT. Thomas resignation imper- atlve. J. H. liked to put down Q bet now and then on the horses but in British eyes that does not constitute an offense against the Defense of the Realm Act. better known during the Great War aS DORA. What really greased the stairs for MT. Thomas slide into the obscurity of private life was his acceptance of 8 magnificent mansion in payment for his auto- biography, any word of which he had neglected to write. Tn view of the flood of boresome and boring autobiographies now on the mar ket 1t seems to me that Mir. Thorn. as instead of being punished for bis oversight should have been ele- Nated to the peerage for not writs ing his life story even though pay. mentNfor 1t had been received in advance. The scandal which the ex-colonial secretary created was due not SO much to his indiscre- ton in loosing Q cabinet secret as to his violation of the established English custom of writing ones autobiography three months after ones death. MT. Thomas doubt- less regrets, now 1t is too late, that he did not contract for Q ghost writer to do the job. If he had adopted that fine invention of contemporary American journal ism and modern Republican liter- Ature, I doubt if 1t would have saved him. His compatriots would never have seen the joke.
 Platform
 Republican state groups are be- ginning to tell the Cleveland con- vention of the party what blanks should 60 Into tho presidential platform. The young g.op. car- penterS of New York and New England have already picked out the lumber they insist must be used. I do not know who made the choice but cursory inspection of them makes me think that W. F. Riker, of Holy City, California, had something to do in the prein- ises. Tn case you are so benighted that you do not know who Mir. w. E. Riker is let mo tell you he is the W. E. Riker who declares that for twelve years he has demonstrated in Holy City, California, e new and perfect plan to save the coun- try. MT. Riker is a Klansman who in an absent.minded moment bestowed upon himself the title of Father" and in another absent- minded moment begged the rec cipients of his plan not to "allow the Demon of Prejudice to dee ceive" them. Like the volunteer Republican platform suggestors Father" ISiker has the solution of all our troubles, social, industrial, political, financial, and imaginary but unlike them he Is no piker. He not only has devised cure for the nations ills but announces that he stands ready to pay 92b,0O0 Reward If Anyone Can Find Q Flaw in This New system or Prove It will Not Work"
 Get in Line!
 There are twenty-three guaran- tees in the Riker Perfect Form of Government" and 1t is irnpossi- ble to print them all. I pick out only those which rank in quality with the demands of New York and New Englands Young Re- publican groups:--
 5. "I guarantee, through my
 social system, to make Kings and Queens out of ell White
 people of sane mind."
 !. q guarantee in time to
 come tho White people will not
 have to do any dispIeasing Ia-
 borlous work"
 90. 'T guarantee after under