The Washington times., 1936-07-10

with handle while ne measured
your neck for the one-two with
his sword.
There is, though, some curious
psychological aura to an august
beard. Just try to imagine a
smooth-shaven Neptune or Jove!
With all the ms and outs Of
boards. somehow they have been
an oriflamme of fortune-poSsibly
on the psychological basis of the
suggestion of power in reserve. No
body knows just what may Turk
behind that majestic front.
There's Congressman Tinkham
of Boston. a Republican who keeps
on going to Congress steadily from
district which is heavily Demo
cratic. His once lush beard, thin.
ming now, is, 1 believe, the only
one in the House. It never has
been suggested that his whiskers
are strategic or grown for artifice
or guile. Mr.. Tinkham is ia
nous hunter who hunts tigers and
lions all over the world.
Mr.. Kingston might conclude
that he had found in the beard
a psychological advantage in these
encounters. Republicans may
work it, but as to Democrats they
have won only with beardleSs
Presidents.
Insofar as Unconditional research
has lit up the beard issue, the con-
clusion is that modern knowledge
of sanitation has baniShed whi:-
kers, and that they probably never
will come back on any large scale.
But even here there is no final
agreement. Miss Amy Elizabeth
Blagg. teacher of zoology at Grin
nell College, Iowa, has done lot
Of work on boards.
PROFESSORS DIFFER
She says they are useful and i'm.
portant appendages; that they are
a perfect air-conditioning plant for
the face, and that they have ther-
NAL and ventilating qualities which
vastly outweigh any considerations
of appearance or conveniece. Rus
STA, just now, is discouraging
them. Her scientists find them I'm.
sanitary.
Heavy theses have been written
by bearded and beardleSs profes-
Sors to prove that boards are the
measure and reflex of racial viril-
ity. They note that a wave Of
WhiSkerS follows each disastrous
war, with Nature reaSserting
stamina and masculinity.
Other professors dispute them,
and any person figuring OH grow
ing beard may safely write his
own ticket. He can find plenty of
authority for or against. One
might conclude happily that here
is one area of forestation in which
governments have not intruded-
but not so! Just recently in Ru-
mania they passed a state edict
against boards, imposing fines for
wearing them.
Many years ago knew hand
some citizen, professional man,
who wore a rather full Van Dyke
beard. I never liked him. He had
an oracular way of speaking and
there seemed to be something syn
thetic about him. After Is years of
presumably happy married life, he
went home with his beard shaved
off. His wife didn't know him.
When he was identified, she al
most SWooned.
"Is that what I married." she
mOaned.
One couldn't blame her. Six
months later they were divorced.
Curiously, his character, as later
revealed, lived down to the un-
pleasant presentment of his de-
nuded features. He was that kind
of man, but his beard had hidden
it from the world.
This writer is neutral about
boards, more interested in the
goings-on on the inside than the
outside of the human skull. But
modern life sweeps away many re-
serves and concealments. Perhaps
it is just as we'll that whiskers
should go along with the rest. In
the close huddle of today, open
faces and open covenants may
| both he desirable