The Washington times., 1936-02-25
Now
The heBishOpTeUS
A Fish Story!
DANCERS JOB
BY HELEN ESSARY
Small Notes on Big People:

TIE occasional home OF Vice
President and Mrs. Jack Garner
at Uvalde, Tex, is next door to the
residence occupied by successive
presiding elders of the Southern
Methodist Church.
Vice President Garner so I un-
derstand, becomes the bosom
friend of each new presiding elder.
Not that Cactus Jack" is a church
man in the literal sense Of the
word. He isn't. And nobody ever
thinks he will be. But he just
naturally likes wise, cheerful,
neighborly presiding elders.
The Bishop of Omaha, Right
Reverend James j. Ryan, has been
in washington for few days,
seeing his old friends and church
associates.
Down in Palm Beach, from which
he Just escaped, the Bishop caught,
80 he told me, while an honest
religious light shone in his eyes,
13 Sailfish!
Mr.. Ferdinand Veverka, Amer
ican Minister from Czechoslovakia,
who has been in Prague several
months, is on his way to the United
States and Cuba.
A new treaty with Cuba is under
Czecho hoSlovakian consideration. The
budget balancer in Prague has
discovered that it is lots cheaper
and far more efficient and agree
able to send a minister across the
ocean than it is to pay cable bills
for Subatlantic treaty parleying.
The House is going to ;nveSti-
gate DR.. Townsend, whose aIniable
intention it is to give 5000 a month
to all needy persons over so.
Suppose they did get the
money? How would they spend 1t?
How much high blood pressure
would the spending cause?
For instance. how many pipes
could Grandpa SIN O ke? What
amount of liver remedy could he
drink? How many sticks out in the
sticks could he whittle? Are there
any lodges Of which he is not a
member now?
And Grandma, the poor darling.
suddenly called upon at go to go
on a spending spree for the rest
Of her life. Would she go in for
higher cosmetics and an occa-
sional gigolo? Would she take to
cigarettes and cocktails and after.
moons at the races?
And, if she did, wouldn't this
mark the extinction of species
the old-fashioned Grandma and
Grandpa?
\ pessimiSt met at a cocktail
party while grieving over this sign
Of the times, suggested that we
shoot and stuff a pair of them for
the Smithsonian, so that future
generations may see how the old
folks, old style, actually looked be-
fore DIR. Townsend brought them
to an end.
Gordon Selfridge. son Of the
Selfridge who invaded England
with an American department
store, is in New York now. He is
coming to Washington to fly down
Suoth for a look at the iva at
work. Perhaps he will go back to
London and persuade the elder
Selfridge to dam up the roaring
Thames. Why, don't know.
One of the most interesting and
ivA VIIn C1NiTN rfONN
Is Madame Rajamaitri, wife of
the Minister of Siam. Exquisitely
and darkly lovely, she seems
drawn with the beautiful precis-
ion and economy Of line and soft
grace that is characteristic Of q
fine Chinese painting.
But Madame Rajamaitri is far
more than merely decorative. She
has q well-informed mind and an
excellent grasp of English which
enables her to discuss with uni
lingual Americans a wide variety
of subjects wisely, humorously and
with the sympathetic understand
ing of a generous spirit.
Attention President Roosevelt!
I suggest, Mr.. President, that
you send a few good tangodancing
statesmen to the proposed con-
ference in Buenos Aires. When
the orchestra plays La Gumpar-
sta" at tea-time in the Jockey
Club, it's not protocols on the
mind that will count, but light
ness in the feet. If we are going
to be represented there at all, let's
be represented right.
Select your delegates, Mr.. Presi-
dent, from among these: Sumner
Welles, William Gibbs McAdoo,
Arthur Capper, Mrs. Benton Nc
MILAN (she has a soft-speaking
voice, too), Colonel Harry Cootes,
Millard Tydings, Rush Holt (for
youth and beauty and George
Simmons.
And now something truly
serious.
J. Edgar Hoover, hero of the
Department of Justice, has just
issued a Uniform Crime Report
for the United States and its pos
sessions. The report says that
burglaries and auto thefts account
for 38.6 per cent Of the total
crimes. There has been a down