Evening star., 1936-09-10
EAR MISS DIX-I am mar
ried to the best man in the
world and we have been as


world and we have been as
- happy together as two peo-
pie could be. But now I am con-
fronted with o problem that threat
ems to wreck all Of our contentment.
It Is this: His people want us to
break up our home and 60 and live
with them because his mother is sick
most of the time. My in-laws are
fine. love them very much and
they are fond of me, but I have a
hunch that If we went to live to-
gether we would fall out. OF course,
I'll 60 If I have to, but don't think
1t Is the right thing to do. And what
I suggest doing Is for my husband
and his sister to hire a woman to 60
and stay with the old people and
do the work. Don't you think that
fair enough? My husband doesn't
make big money. MRS. c. E. D.
Answer: Your plan Is the sensible
one, and 1t will save all Of you a lot
OF misery If you put 1t through 1t
will save you so much grief that I
urge you to deny yourself almost any,
thing in order to hire a woman to
stay with your mother-in-law rather
than to go yourself.
1t sounds cynical to say that in
families distance makes the heart
grow fonder and that generally we
love our relatives. and especially our
in -lQWS in y,rororfia, 70 tba oy,o,,,+
OF space there is between us. We en-
Joy and are fond of those whom we
see only occasionally when We have
our best company manners on and
Wnen our interests do not conflict.
But those whom we live with, day in
and day out, whose whims and
peculiarities rub us raw, and whose
little aggravating ways We have to
stand are more than flesh and blood
can bear. And the results are quar-
rels and bitterness and strife that
wreck the happiness of SO many
people.
zee If you can't make your husband
grasp this one simple fact: That
when he asks you to 20 into his
mothers house and take charge of
It ana nurse her, he Is asking two
women to make supreme sacrifices.
He Is asking his mother to step down
on OF the throne she has occupied
ever since her husband brought her
nome as bride. He is asking her to
give up all authority In matters over
which she has ruled for 80 years; to
keep her fingers out of the pies that
she has always made according to
her own little recipe, which is as in
flexible as the law of the Medes and
the Persians.
He Is asking you to make yourself
. slave in another woman's house: to
do her bidding, be subject to her
orders; to have no freedom to even
change the arrangement of a room.
and for all your toll and sacrifices to
have no reward but criticism and COM
plants.
IT your husband thinks that this
adjustment of two women can be made
happily and harmoniously, he knows
mighty little of the feminine temper
ament. 1t simply can't be done. No
oaughter-in-law can come in and oust
her mother-in-law out of her own
house without friction, for no daugh-
ter-in-law is enough of rubber stamp
to be willing to meekly do her mother
in-law's bidding In house In which
she Is doing all Of the work. They are
bound to differ on a thousand little
points.
know Of one family quarrel whose
rancor has survived for more than 20
years in which the mother -in-law and
daughter-in-law fell out over the way
to wash q pitcher.
So my earnest advice to you is to
pay servant to go and take care of
your mother-in-law and stay in your
own home. 1t will save the happiness
of all concerned.
r X
DEAR MISS DIX: At the career
conference for women recently
held in Philadelphia, Miss Marie Do
remus. the personnel director of the
Philadelphia Gas Works, gave the fol-
lowing advice to job-seeking girls. She
said: Don't wear fuzzy-wuzzy hair
bobs, sleeveless dresses, lipstick, too
much rouge or red-painted finger
nails" can add that In the large
corporation with which am associ-
ated no girl who had any Of these
habits would be considered as an ap-
plicant for job, no matter what her
qualifications or recommendations
Perhaps 1t will help some other girl
to land job to pass this tip along.
SOCRATES.
Answer-No doubt it will, for in
trying to make themselves attractive
many girls achieve the exactly oppo-
site results and by their overuse Of