Evening star., 1936-11-05
y Interesting Pie Filings Should Be New and "Derent
Dorothy Dix Says
'How Much Housework Is Half?" Is
Difficult Problem to Solve.

~ EAR MISS DIX-we have
been married three months.
Both myself and my hus-
band work. However, my
position Is not q confining one and
1t is no trouble for me to cook and
keep our apartment In order. We
decided to divide the housework and
each do half, but as things now
stand am doing about nine -tenths
Of the work. This makes me very
unhappy. as 7 think my husband is
not giving me a fair deal. When I
say anything about it. he becomes
very angry, as he really believes that
he Is doing half Of the work. He
makes such a colossal job out Of every
small task that it takes him four
times too long to do it. and he thinks
he Is doing more work than he actu-
ally Is doing. He Is faithful and
steady; gives me his pay-check each
week; never leaves me alone; goes
where I say end when I say, and is
really trying to be a COED husband.
What shall do? Shall I insist upon
dividing the work exactly in half,
or shall do the work cheerfully
and be thankful ior all his good
qualities? am in such q state of
mind over 1t that I am cross and
unkind to my husband because I
have this terrible feeling that he is
not doing his share. ESTELLE.
Answer-I do not think that YOU
have much love for your husband if
you count the cost Of everything you
do for him and If you watch, like
task-mistress, to zee that he gives
you a like amount Of service. In
love 1t Is more blessed to give than
to receive. A woman who really
loves man finds her greatest hap
piness in ninisterins to him and
making him comfortable, in doing
little things for him. She does, not
begrudge every lick Of work she does
Tor him. 1t is ner free-will Offering
on the altar Of her devotion.
Whether her husband does as much
for her as she does for him does not
enter into her calculations at all.
The old ideal of marriage was that
the man supported the house and the
wife turned it into a home by her
labor. He brought home the bacon
and she fried it. It was assumed that
this was fair adjustment of labor in
the matrimonial partnership and that
the man should no more be expected
to help the wife with the housework
than she should be expected to help
him with his job.
or COURSE, when the husband and
wife both work outside Of the
home this arrangement goes blooey,
and 1t is nothing more than fair that
when the wife lends hand at earning
the money to support the home, the
husband should take his turn in the
kitchen. But, even so, I do not see
how it would ever be possible to estab-
lish to a mathematical nicely just
exactly what proportion Of the work
each should do.
If you are going to put it on a cold,
hard, business basis, you will have to
take into account how much money
each brings in, and whether the
amount Of work each is to do Is in a
direct ratio to his or her pay envelope
II, for example, the husband earned
$40 q week and the wife $40, would
she have to peel twice As many pota-
toes as he did2 II wife's hours
were shorter than husbands and she
worked less hard abroad, would not
husband have Q right to expect her
to work harder In the home? And 90
on and so forth.
My advice to you is to quit trying to
bargain with your husband about the
housework and trying to see that you
don't get cheated. You've got to meet
marriage in a broader and more gen.
erous spirit than that. You can't
collect your pound Of flesh next the
heart without stopping it beating for
you. Try to make your husband
nappy. Try to make him feel that
you do things for him because you love
to do them for him, and you will find
lar more prout In IL than In trying
to make him do, lick for lick, as much
Of the housework as you do.
4 \ X 4
DEAR DOROTHY DIX-A young
man recently married a girl who
believed that the wife should be the
banker. Two months before the we'd
ding he began turning his weekly
check over to her and she put it in
the bank with her own check. The
husband Is not waster nor q spender,
and is not only able to earn, but also
to handle the money he makes. To
the minds Of this young man and this
young woman the question: What
else has the husband that is as i'm
portant to him as his household and
a., is s,v,a h1a