Milford chronicle., 1936-07-03

ukU
Mr.. b ears t was Irwin s. Cobb
moving heaven and
earth and Jack Garner to nominate
+. d. Roosevelt. In whom he reposed
everlasting faith. And the Repub-
Hean Old Guard was explaining that
when its candidate had promised
two cars in every garage he didn't
ngure that for either car there'd
be deputy sheriff with a writ.
All of which proves our anointed
leaders are not only courageous but
consistent. Well, let's see what the
boys will promise US this year in
those actiOnal Whimsicalities called
platforms.
WTE'YE been skirting the sun
W baked domains of one .sizabIe
group Of early American families
who don't care who's been nominat-
ed at Cleveland or who'll be nom
mated at Philadelphia. No matter
which side wins, these folks still
will furnish the raw material upon
which blithe amateurs OF the Indian
bureau work weird experiments In
the name Of civilization.
Nothing worse can happen 70
them than already has been wrought
BY well-meaning meddlers and earn
est muddlers under this administra.
tion or that. For instance. trying
TO make farmers out Of Apaches. a
task akin to training Gagged hen.
hawks to initiate cuckoo clocks.
OF course. should their reservas
lions BY some miracle prove produce
tive. the white sman will crowd
tseP over iPtO a rem0ter thirst
blasted area, where a hUrned toad
would have to go on relief or else
starve to death.
The vanishing American can't
complain that we've ever failed to
expedite his vanishing act for him.
Beating the WeIIin.
THE poor old welkin certainly
4 took an awful beating at Cleve-
land, didn't It? And Just about the
time the new skin forms. they'll rip
Il all over again at Philadelphia.
Language is to a national cohven-
tion what yelping is to a coon dog
trailing. It's a fine personal adver-
tisement for the dog and doesn't
mean anything either way to the
coon.
The old superstition that the Re
publieans always pick their eandi-
date at 2 a. N. "ln a smoke-filled
room" didn't come true. You'd think
the bosses would emerge from the
session looking like so many hick-
ory-eured hams when you hear peo-
pie tell Of the old times. I'll bet
the 9. o. P. boys kept a window
open to clear the air. II might also
have come in handy for chucking
Senator Borah out Of.
But when the credentials commit
tee sat to hear the contesting dele
cations from the deep, dark South
that's when you'd see what prop
erly might be called a smoke-illed
room.
Defying the Congress.
THREE years ago Bishop Can
4 non, the famous Virginia smooth
bore, Invited a senatorial investiga-
ion committee to go jump or the
monument. Perhaps
hey didn't jump of the monument,
which caused regret to some, but Il
vas the best offer they had all
season.
This year Doctor Townsend, who
lasn't lost a cent by being the head
4 the Townsend plan, tells an In
committee Of the house
o kiss his foot.
They never punished the bishop
or contempt although they sput-
cred Ike a bunch OF damn fire.
rackers. Here's laying a little eight
Dive they'll never punish the Doe.
ither He'll 60 merrily on with the
ver-popular idea that, II there isn't
pot Of gold at the foot Of the rain
ow, the government should supplv
lme without any more Of this shiI-
l-shallying.
Next to the League Of Nations.
othing seems to make SO much
oise and accomplish so little asa
ahed congress-unless It Is some
How playing a slide trombone lnlo
& empty barrel.
IRWIN s. coBs.
e-WNU Service.