The Waterbury Democrat., 1936-08-18
Today,S Sports
 Parade
By HENRY McIRNORE JnltAd Press Stan COrFeenOndenll

By HENRY Mcb.EMORE
 Limited Press Stan C0rFespOndent)
 Berlin, Aug. I9,--tUp)--I do not have R mouataeha and there isn't c mosquito in Germany this season.
 unimportant faeM2 To you, may bo, but not to mo, for they have plagued me ever since my arrival In this country.
 Tho two faets--no mouStache and no moBquitos- entered my lifo when I bought ono Of those handy little phrase books which are r rcd t0 be invaluable tn asking y way about . strange land. Unfortunate. ly, tho ono 1 purchased in a little book stall just oR p0tsdamer PlatY was very old. It must have eomo or the presseA in the days when Fred- erlck was creating ell over tho place.
 ! sAt down right away with my little treasure, intending to memor. iSe It from cover t0 cover. But ] never got beyond tho opening two phrases, of which the first was "kruaeln bio bite meinen Echnurr- bart ein wenig" or "Pleaso but the irons on my m0usta0he". Number 2-and I spare you the German for it.-wAS T would greatly appreciate q moaqulto curtain"
 I immediately saw the lmpFacLio. ability of these two expressions but also realized tho danger Of skipping them. Well, to make a long story short, by the time had those two babies under control the olympic games had started and l had no time to pursue language, Az . re- suit 1, q stranger in . strange land, have been forced to make my way about with those two expressions.--. put the irons on my Tioustache and would greatly appreciate . mos- quito curtain.
 You'd he surprised to know how many citizens consider mo as crazy as c loon. I know that q certain walter in Hahel's restaurant does, For it was to him, when ! wanted my check, that I smiled agFeeably and said:
 "KTauAelin sic bitte melnen schnurTbArt ein Wenlg."
 And I'm equally sure there isn't . bollhop or elevator man in the KalAeFhof hotel who doean't feel tho same way. And I don't blame them. It must be something of q shock Co ask c man what floor he wants and have him ABk you for mosqult0 net. That happened a dozen times day for weeks.
 And there are tho hundreds of assorted citizens whom l greeted with one or the other of my two phrases when I wanted direction, matches, or the time of day.
 But heading the list of Berllnera who rate me as completely whacky is the barber who, when l sat down in his chair for Q haircut, was told to put the irons to my mouatachea. shall never forget the look in his eyes when he took a good look at my face and didn't see . whitaker. First 1t was bewilderment, then it was amaEement and then--aa he brushed his hand across my upper lip as if to verify his own eye- sight--suspicion, touched with fear,
 With such 6 limited knowledge of German it was necessary for mo to occasionally fall back on my Eng lish. And handled English just as does every other American when attempting to make his language understood by e foreigner. That ia, yelled the words at the top of my voice and mispronounced them as much as possible. I wonder why Americans do that Even another American couldn't understand Eng fish words if they were yelled at him and mispr0nOuneed as atr0ci- 0usly as we all hand the mout to foreigners. For some reason all Americans believe aii foreigners are deaf.
 And get mad at anyone who doesn't speak English. Even 6 boot black is not beyond ln ywrAth when no falls to answer in perfect Eng fish. Of course. such anger doeHnt make sense, any more than tt would for a German vlelting New York to punch . soda fountain boy in the nose for not being able to describe the contents of banana apiie in fIawless German.
 Come Co think about it, ! believe German Is about the only language capable Of taking earo of e banana apIsts ingredients. But I would like to have one right nov.
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