Carolina watchman. [volume] (Salisbury, N.C.) 1871-1937, 1936-05-08
G60sE
WOMAN
1 REX EACH

temperament, too. l lived every
role 1 played: l put vitality and
fire into them. When l was on the
stage they used to say I was a flam-
ing genius. Flaming!"
], Mrs. Holmes tramped about the
$ room as she talked; beneath hel
: fleet the bare floor boards creak-
ed.
'I've told you how my big sue
cess came abroad. You know all
that and how l was anticipating
the day when l could come home
and achieve my supreme triumph,
here in America. How l met your
father-in Paris. 1t wasn't his first
affair, nor mine, but it was the
first time I had ever been genuine
ly, madly in love. I didn't know
l had it in me. / was a perfect fool.
Most women are, by the way, at
one time or another. HI hadn't a
thing-money, I mean-so l gave
him what l had earned and what
had been given to mt. l show
cred him with gifts, spoiled him,
turned his head. He took it all
and we lived wildly, extravagant-
ly, drunk with each others love.
That temperament again!
Il suppose it had begun to pail
on him even before we learned that
you were coming, but he didn't
! show it. When we discovered
that l wa going to have a baby
l supposed we talked about mar
riage-people usually do. Prob
ably that helped to spoil things.
Perfect love, perfect romance, was
one thing; marriage, squalling chill
dren, milk bottles, dirty dishes
that was another. He was an artist.
You came between us even before
you were born.
"He couldn't bear to see the
change in me. My appearance got
more and more on his nerves. He
quit finally-went away. That
was a terrible shock to me; it was
enough to kill most of the affection
I might have felt for you. Oh,
I know it sounds unnatural, in
credible! That's because you can't
understand how some people are
constituted. You're full of story
book sentiment; this was real life.
Neither of us was domestic. You
won't understand, either, when
I tell you that his desertion
wouldn't have left any ser
ious results on me; they said
as a matter Of fact, that it
would make me even a great artist
having suffered. But at least you
can understand how it turned me
back to my work with a more pas
sionate devotion than ever since
it was all I had left, all that was real
and substantial and satisfying. My
voice had never been so splendid
as it was during that period. My
friends told me that a miracle had
occurred and that I possessed the
most beautiful voice in the world.
They worshiped it. They, and l.,
blessed you as the cause of it.
"Then you were born -. Again
Mrs. Holmes turned her eyes upon
her son, and now they were bril-
liant, feverish; her face was work
ing. "You know what happened!
For a while, the doctor encouraged
me to believe hat my voice would
come back. That was to keep me
from killing myself. But it didn't
come back. 1t was gone, lost to the
world! There were artists in the
company who would have strang led
you, gladly, and hung for it, if it
would have brought back Mary
Holiness voice. That's how much
they thought of it. That's what
a truly great voice means.
"You wonder why I've never
been a real mother to you. God!
you've been a living reproach to
;. me; every day of your life you have
:. tortured me, stuck knives in me
:, AS if that weren't enough, you've
grown into the very image OF your
, aather-you're like him, inside
: and out. I suppose this girl feels
:, towards you the way I felt towards
, him-so far as she's capable. But
I'll bet she won't marry you. Not
now she won't" For a second time
the speaker giggled,
Gerald Ainched at the sound, but
> he did not raise his head. ut
oao,,e +o oiva VOL, an unholv salts