The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1936-07-30

children along. You can get along fine
without a woman in the home-or at
least that is what two or three Of my
friends have told me recently. I'm
not committing myself just yet, al
though 1 did a little observing last
winter.
But they say a man can manage
easily if he keeps a few things in
mind. For instance:
Wearing two pairs of socks may
hide the holes in both.
Cardboards removed from shirts
may be placed around the top of
wastebaskets so as to make them hold
more. Ditto for the garbage pail, only
the idea isn't so good during the hot
weather.
An alarm clock beneath the bed
will wake you when you bump your
head attempting to find it.
A corner near the bathroom makes
an excellent soiled-clothes hamper an
mex.
If button is off a shirt, a small
piece of adhesive tape on the under
side will do the trick. Those with
hairy chests, however, should be sure
that the adhesive part is next to the
shirt.
A heavy towel around leaky bath
room faucet at nights makes the drip
noiseless.
Dust on the floor and furniture will
not be noticed if the blinds are kept
drawn.
A few suggestions wherein caution
is necessary:
Dirt swept under rug over toe
long a period of time makes it lumpy
around the edges.
Read labels on all cans and don't
open tomato soup for pork and beans
You might as we'll start out to
scramble the eggs in the first place
Burned toast can be made edible by
scraping with knife, if you find the
knife.
Burned meat can be fixed by apply
ing Unguentine right away. At least
that will prevent it from blistering
Remain quiet after taking head.
ache tablets; relax and think how
happy you will be when your wife re-
appears.
Iodine blisters Immediately if g
bandage is applied; after using iodine
fan gently with a magazine and looE
where you are going the next time, you
big pot.
On the day you expect her to ap.
pear, real considerate man will &c
through the house and rumple things
just to give his wife the impression
he is helpless male and is unable tt
get along by himself.
~ww
They Never Leave You Alone
Have you big fly in your home
If not, it's most unusual, but you
can inquire at the red brick mansion
We sell them by the dozen and a
reasonable prices, too.
The long and severe winter mus
have had its effect on the small flies
as they seemed to be scarce until the
recent rains, but the big buzzin' kline
just keep rolling along. They have en-
dured throughout the summer, eacl
one seeming to profit by the mistake:
of the ones going before.
They plan to make their appearance
just after you are comfortably seated
either at the dinner table or under the
reading lamp. The first two or three
were unsuspecting of the dangers Of
coming in contact with those terrible
tempered human beings.
They had no idea that anybody
would swing on them with theil
new magazine or today's paper, much
less The Republican. They would buzz
around briefly and then settle dow
to rub their heads with their from
feet, and relax.
They were easily fiattened out will
your hand or a fly swatter, if you're
more particular. But they soon caught
on. They now do their buzzing contin
ually up near the ceiling, eleven fee
away. and it seems like their generator
never goes out of whack. Occasionally
one of the baby's blocks is we'll aimee
and one more fly bites the dust, but
this practice is not recommended as il
puts red marks on the ceiling wher
successful and puts dents in the plas
ter regardless.
First, we tried keeping them out Of
the house by fixing all the screens
But what good are screens when the
children get in the middle of a door
way and stand there undecided fo1
ages?
Thus the conclusion was reached
| Ah14 d. l.