Evening star., 1935-07-28

As it is, your friends are no more likely to be
bored than you would have been.
My advice is to write at once to those whom
you like most. Write warm enthusiastic
letter such as: ''Mollie dear, are you and Tom
never coming out to see us = and Our farm1
Really we are not far away, and we both
long to see you. Won't you and Tom come
out for the day this Sunday3
1--WE have dinner at half past twelve and
supper at six 1--WE are farmers, you know or if
not this Sunday will you come next? Or would
you rather come on Saturday? We will like
this just as much, unless you'll mind having
us 60 on with few eek-day chores - that
is the only reason Sunday is better. But
whatever day it is, do say when - and make
it soon. Afectionately, Jane
When they come, be glad to see them and
give them as much of your undivided atten-
tion as you can. When you have household
things to do - do them as matter of course
and take the fact of your having to do them
casually.
I'd like to feel sure that the attribute of
casualness will be understood because it is the
very essence of worldly ease and grace. To be
able to take all situations or circumstances
with casual ease does not mean being flippant
or rude or careless or heartless. But it does
mean taking things naturally and easily, and
as they come, and with an instructive sense of
values.
The outstanding fault of those who have no
gift for the admirable phases of casualness is
hot thox ,,.I ox,I
to underscore the trifling incidents in life,
much as those who having small appreciation
of word values underscore the most trivial
passages in their letters.
But to return to the question of how much
pleasure your friends from the city will find
at the farm: The golden rule that advises the
hostess to put herself in her guest place is not
always helpful, because individual tastes and
temperaments can differ widely. Nevertheless
it seems to me that the ordinary measures of
common sense, plus reasonably alert observa-
ton, ought to make you aware of things that
would be pleasant or unpleasant to every one
whom you knew at all well.
Certainly it is safe to suppose that anyone
who is fond of you and of your husband would
be overjoyed to spend an afternoon or evening
just sitting around and enjoying long
friendly talk. A stranger would not - unless
what you have to say is of unusual interest to
that particular person, or unless he himself is
one who loving to lecture, asks nothing better
than an attentive audience.
Therefore, in urging you to invite your
friends Anne and Dick. Mollie and Tom, and
all the others, to come and spend an hour, or
an afternoon, or whole day at the farm, am
not suggesting that you formally invite people
whom you scarcely know, and with whom you
have nothing in common, to sit for hours on
the porch and look at the sky. the trees and
the cows.
One actual advantage that those of mod
crate means necessarily hold over those whose
purses are seemingly unlimited, is that there
is no question but that the former are liked
only for themselves, whereas it is almost i'm
possible to determine to just what degree
material advantages have counted in the
popularity of the latter.
If you, for instance, had lived in town in
great house, if you had given endless parties
of the most lavish sort, if the people who
thronged your drawing rooms or your ball
room or your terrace were barest acquaint-
ances whom you knew better by name than
by sight, then your fear that they would be
bored should they be asked to sit and look
at the cows would be more than well founded.