Evening star., 1935-05-02

the woman wrote you about
- being lonely and forlon,
because ner husband has
outgrown Ter. My case was similar
to hers. I had no education. I dis
liked to read, and had a bad inferior
ity complex. When I realized the
situation between my husband and
myself, I lamented and resorted to
tears, but that gained me nothing.
Then I resolved to do my best to
bring myself as near as possible to
my husbands standards. I bought
dictionary and studied it. I COM
PEELED myself to read. I forced myself
to mix with people took dancing
lessons. I learned how the principal
outdoor games were played. re-
gained my looks by physical exercise
and diet. It was hard work and 1t
took 10 years before I really gained
recognition, but today I can meet my
husbands friends with ease. We can
discuss subjects of interest to both.
We are companions. But I'm still
struggling on, trying to keep UP with
him.
OF course, a man likes his wife to
be a good cook and housekeeper, but
that is not enough. She must be
pal, comrade, and a good sport.
WIFE WHO WON.
A NSWER-There would not be SO
4 many women in Reno nor so many
lacrymoSe, neglected wives, if more
of them had the intelligence and de-
termination of this woman. She saw
that her marriage was going on the
rocks, but instead of beating on her
breast and lamenting the perf1dy Of
husbands, as most wives do under
similar circumstances, she got busy
and saved 1t. And that is what the
great majority Of other wives could
do when they see the same danger
ahead of them, If they were only will
ing to take the trouble and make the
sacrifices to do 1t.
But they are not. They would
rather lose husband than make the
effort to hold him. They will let
their houses come tumbling down
around their ears. rather than put
their shoulders under them and hold
them up by sheer strength and deter
mination. It is so much easier to
pass the buck and lay all the blame
on a husband than it is to correct
the faults in themselves that have
driven him to some other woman. 1t
is so much more agreeable to pose as
q martyr than it is to reform yourself.
IT Is the stranger that women show
L so little effort to make their mar
riages a success, when not only their
love lives but their physical well-being
depends on it. For marriage Is a
woman's business. her means of max
ing living. 1t Is her job, and If she
loses that, she Is as out of luck as
any other woman who finds pink
slip in her pay envelope on Saturday
night. A little grudgingly given ali
mony does not compensate for the
comfortable living that the woman
has If she Is wife in good standing
| with her husband.
Most wives who lose their husbands
affections. as the phrase goes. contend
that it was a bolt from the blue, like
| being struck down by lightning, some
| thing for which they were in no way
responsible and could not have been
prevented. They are sure their hus-
bands didn't quit kissing them be-
cause they were no longer kissable,
| or that their husbands didn't come
home to dinner because there was
| nothing fit to eat at home, or that
their husbands hunted up other wom-
en- for companions because they never
talked about anything except the chill
dren and the high price of food.
IT TAKES more character than the
average woman possesses to do as
this correspondent did and recognize
that, II she Is losing her husband, it
is because she no longer meets all
of his requirements in a wife, and
she must go deliberately to work to
make herself over to his taste.
But she did it and she won out,
and any wife who will follow her
example can attain the same results
nine times out of ten. For the wife
always has the advantage over any
other woman, that she was her hus-
bands first love, that he is bound to
her by a thousand ties of association
and habit and duty, that the hands
of little children hold them together
and all the powers of convention and
society fight on her side. Many q
wife who sees the love light going out
on the domestic altar could fan ii
into flame again, if only she had the
energy to do it. DOROTHY DIX.
| x
DEAR MISS DIx-I am girl OF
- II. How can tell absolutely
and without fail when have fallen
in love and when boy Is in love
with me? I don't want to make any
mistake. I want to be sure of love
| when ! find it. NORMA.