The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1935-06-05

TRENDS or ours
but we moved from their neighbour
hood and dropped them because
I was so jealous.
Now they have moved in our
neighborhod again and I'm afraid
it will start all over again. We quar-
relied about it recently. He tells me
that when he does ride her home
he won't mention it to me: so there
I am. That made me terribly angry.
What should I do? Be friends with
these people and invite them over?
Or would this only make him want
to do things to hurt me. Perhaps l
am the one to blame for being so
jealous. What is wrong with me?
UNHAPPY.
AnsWer-For one thing I i'm
agine you secretly like this woman
very much yourself and can not
imagine your husband as immune
from her charms. You are trying
to dominate him by masculine
means instead of beguiling him
with feminine wiles. Remember,
if any woman takes your husband
away, she will do it by initiating
his ego, not by debating it, as you
want to do.
1t has been said with consider
able truth that jealousy is not so
much sign Of love as the desire
to dominate. If you will check up
on yourself you can see that this
is largely true of you. When your
husband refuses to tell you when
he gives a neighbor a lift your
jealousy is aroused to white heat.
What does this mean Merely that
you can not stand for him to act
independently of you.
There is hope for you because
you know you are often obliged
to invent reasons for your jeal-
ousy and you know you like to
hurt your husband. If you were
lying to yourself the problem
would be harder. Can't you find
something to manage besides
your husband? Oftentimes a good
Job will use up a woman's agrees
sion during business hours leav-
ing her content to play a more
passive role with her husband. If
you can't find a paying job, how
about joining a Woman's club
where you do your bit of man
aging ard supervising?
1t is a great mistake to prove
your strength by trying to control
your husband. You only rob him
of his masculinity and cause him
to oppose YOU in defense of his
pride. Please your husband but
don't usurp his place as head of
the house.
Dear Jane JOrdan-I am 80 years
old and enjoy going out and having
the companionship of friends. 1 be-
long to a card club, all women,
which meets every two weeks. I
belong to a church and missionary
society which meets once a month.
60 to my mothers about once
every two or three months. My hus-
band thinks 1 run around an awful
lot. Do you? He works fro.n 7:.30
a. m. to 4 p. m. and then comes
home and works in the yard and
garden. He reads the newspaper I'M
til about 10 p. m. and never knows
that I am here. He is a good worker
but he is the hardest man on earth
to please. He would rather die than
try to please me or say anything
good about me.
1 am a good cook and house
keeper and hard worker but there
is always something wrong with the
things do. He would never go any
place if I didn't ask him once in
while. don't ask him very often
because I know he would rather
stay home. I think We are too young
to sit at home all the time, night
after night. just looking at the
paper. am at the end Of the rope.
B. C.
Answer-If your husband only
knew it your outside activities are
the only thing that makes it pos
sible for you to stand such dull
existence. But Of course he doesn't
know it and it won't do any good
for you to tell him so. If you are
smart you can get your house
work done and still have time 10
enjoy a few friends before 4 in
the afternoon. Why say anything
about it?
You give up too easily in coax
ing yolIr husband 10 go out in the
evening. When you ask him don't
let him think he is going TO please
you. Sell him on the idea that he
IS going to have a good time.
You work so hard all day you
need a little relaxation" Give
deity applied flattery chance to
work for you.