Worcester Democrat and the ledger-enterprise. (Pocomoke City, Md.) 1921-1953, 1935-10-04
~
from the
Democrats Pen

Did any of you people read tnat
little story in one of the Virginia pap
ers about a man who advertised Tor
a wife, and got an answer seventy
five years afterwards? At least, an
answer to the letter was found after
that time had elapsed. He was twen-
tv-fiye wears old when he advertised
for a helpmate, and it is likely he had
been gathered to his fathers when the
answer turned up.
But what world Of speculation
that little story brings up to the minds
eve! What vast field for the range
of the imagination. Suppose the an
swer had been duly received and the
two had decided to go hand in hand
down the avenues of time. Just how
much of happiness or misery would
the union have resulted in; whether
fate stepped in to prevent a mismat-
ing of lives; or whether a tragedy
was averted when the joining OF hands
of two souls with but a single thought,
two hearts that beat as one went
astray.
You know, this marriage business
isn't always what it's cracked up TO
be. Now, I'm speaking confidentally
to you people, because I'm no single
man myself, and haven't been one for
some years. So what say might be
counted against me, you see. But not
all marriages are made in heaven;
some of 'em would lead us to believe
there was a manufacturing of twin
lives in another place I could mention.
Just about as many are made there as
Reno puts into the melting pot.
Now, as to the man who advertised,
one might start thinking about wheth-
er the woman who was willing would
have pulled his hair, his pocket-book,
and his leg; or would she have smooth
ed his locks, helped him fill his purse,
and rubbed his "jints" when rheuma-
tiz set in. Would she have nagged
him or known when to talk and when
to keep mum? Would she have want
ed to know where he was at, when he
went home at various hours of the
eventide? or would she have met him
at the door with a kiss? Would she
have scratched his eyes out-almost-
or would she have told him what a
beautiful color they were? Oh!
there's volumes that could be written
as to what might have happened If
those two rivers of life had flowed
into single stream.
A good deal has been written about
this question of marriage. Some OF
it seems to convey the idea that men
and women-or some of thenl-are an
gels, when they agree to shook up"
For instance, wonder if you agree
with Addison who said, 1.-TWO persons
who have chosen each other out OF all
the species, with the desire to be each
others comfort and entertainment
have in that action, bound themselves
to be goodhumored, affable, discreet,
forgiving, patient, and joyful, with re-
spect to each others frailities and per-
fections, to the end of their lives?"
Kind reader, how close do you come
to measuring up to that standard ?
Are you and your better half all them
things? Or, do you evince in your
associations just little bit of old Faith
er Adam, and also are a type Of the
lower angels? Now, another writer
who sported the name "Bovee," puts
it on the man like this: "The love OF
some men for their wives is like that
of Alfieri for his horse: MY attach
ment for him. said he, went so fat
as to destroy my peace every time that
he had the least ailment; but my love
for him did not prevent me from fret
ting and chatting him whenever he die
not wish to go my way,
All I can say about that is, that
some women own horses, too, and
know how to drive 'em, make no mis-.
take about that. I am very much Of
the opinion of the lady who wrote
Gin the opinion of the world, marriage
ends all, as it does in comedy; the
truth is precisely the reverse-it be-
gins all"