davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Evening star., 1935-07-29

My o small part Of what we
call Greater London Is known
as "the city" In q curiosity
cartoon, we might find this
Evening star., 1935-07-29

- EDDY FOX Is smart. Ask any
y Of the little people Of the
Green Meadows and the
Y Green Forest and they'll tell
Evening star., 1935-07-29

tcopyrisht 1887
The Washington times., 1935-04-03
Greatest Show On Earth
By John Snure, T.

In his appeal Mr.. Fish says:
1--WE are a united nation with
2 common interest in the des-
tiny of our republic, no mat
ter what section Of the cOun-
try we come from. -" All
sections of the country must
present a solid and united
front in defense Of the ideals
and principles Of government
wtich they cherish and uphold
them against our enemies from
within who seek to tear down
ana destroy our free institutions
and republican form Of gov
ernment!"
Mr.. Fish must be taking Seri-
ously the proposal by Represen-
tative Harold L. KnutSon, Re
publican, of Minnesota, that
Fish be the next Republican
candidate for the presidency.
Representative John S. Nc
Groarty, the Democratic poet
laureate of California, has been
Worried for some WeetS.
His worry originated because
Representative John j. Boy
The Washington times., 1935-04-03
Still in the Dark

Manifold difficulties confront the receivers of closed banks
in Washington Their task requires patience tact and long
hours Of labor In the MAN, they have done commendab
job.
But Washington closed banks still holding approximately
$2000000 Of depostors money There is still much work to
be done.
Meanwhile the depostors in closed local banks receiving
intelligent analyses of the condition of the institutions where
they placed their savings? THEY ARE NOT.
The secrecy that hrouded the initial efforts Of this
Administration depotors from the ruin that followed
in wholesale wreckage of local financial institutions continues
to veil every of the Treasury Department in cleaning
the debacle
The Treasury Department has yet to explain to Washington
deposors what being done about the Commercial National
Bank.
This institution it charged in this newspaper year ago.
Illegally paid funds Government agencies with accounts
there.
Do the thousands of dpoors in this bank have any nkng
what action any, the Treasury Department is taking to
rectify this situation? THEY DO NOT.
Washington depositors have right to know these things
THE MONEY IN CLOSED BANKS DOES NOT BELONG TO
THE TREASURY DEPARTMENT OR THEIR AGENTS, THE
RECEIVERS
Depostors have right to know what action is being taken
30 protect their interests
Receivers should bear this fact in mind They are employed
by the Treasury Department. but they also watchdog for
The depositors
The Washington times., 1935-04-03
Cheap Foreign Propaganda

In dealing with foreign nations Government is tradi
honay gble but even our guble Government less easily
hoodwinked than some of eminent citizens.
We refer those citizens who accept foreign hono titles
or decorations the belief that these marks Of favor
recognition of their abilities achievements.
Such attentions brbes-bribes that cost the
bribers little nothing
And in return for these brides the Americans whom they
are conferred lifelong po and propaandists for
the donating nation.
This state of affairs disgusts plain Americans.
To remedy it, plain American in Congress- Representative
Knutson Minnesota has introduced bill making it unlaw-
full for any American citizen to accept from king prince
foreign governments for military service rendered. any
present emolument office title of any kind whatever
This bill might 60 further 1t might well prohibit the &C.
ceptance Of ANY DECORATION from any foreign power.
fiveanden-cen medal yard of red ribbon can turn
too many socaed citizens into soulful rooters for anything
across the Atlantic and equally soulful booers Of anything at
home.
But with or without this addition the Knutson measure is
sound in principle and should be passed.
It will remind section of people that their duty to
the country first and not to be bartered away for
some tin-horn title or rubbishy rosette.
The Washington times., 1935-04-03

The account from Cambridge
says: THE intelligence, or so
phistication, of the audience
seems to affect the value of a
joke" Well, that's a start, any
way. The only thing left is to
find out POSSIBLY by an indi-
vidual polD just what kind Of
joke that particular audience
will laugh at, and then to make
them laugh at it.
There are one or two ques'
lions. which some veteran come
dams would like to ask the doc
tors to look into, while they are
at it:
Why does one audience laugh
at a joke on Wednesday night
and another audience, of exactly
the same type, refuse to laugh
at it on Thursday?
Why does a so-called "SOphis-
ticated" joke sometimes get a
laugh out of an "unsophisti-
Gated" audience and flop before
an audience of smart" folk?
There are one or two ques-
tions which even veteran come
dams would like to ask the doc
tors about while they've got
their instruments out:
Why does a gag have them
Gin the aisles" on Tuesday
night and lie right in the foot
lights on Wednesday, the two
audiences being supposedly Of
the same class Of patrons?
Why does a joke seem funny
to the comedian himself when
people laugh and unfunny to
him when they don't? It's the
same joke.
Why do so-called "Smart gags"
sometimes flop before a smart
audience, and throw yOkelS into
Mysteries?
How can you tell anything?
Take one point which the pSy.
biologists have made, supposed
ly based on the brain-power Of
an audience. They say that a
group Of low-grade intelligences
laugh at punS, whereas the
more highely trained minds re-
ject this common form Of
humor.
This doubtless explains why
punning has been the delight
of most sophisticated" joke
sters, from the first Oliver Wen.
dell Holmes down through the
modern craze among literary
minded wags for using puns in
sentences. OF course, a lot
would depend on the quality
of the puns used experimentally
in the Harvard laboratory. I
have a feeling that they weren't
so hot.
I once had occasion to look
over some Of the material used
in this very series Of tests, and,
if I personally had been under
examination, they wouldn't have
got a giggle out Of me, even II
I had a detector fastened to my
wrist and a man standing be-
side me with a pencil and pa
per. And yet I am not consid-
cred q tough audience.
Perhaps what they need up
at Harvard are some new gags.
AS who doeSn't9
Copyright, 1885, by King Features
Syndicate In0.p
The Washington times., 1935-04-03

Elsie Robinson raves u OuG
Emma and envies her. Says
how wonderful it must be to
be such a pal to your children.
Growing up with your chill
dren-? Yes, I suppose it's
the thing to do" she brooded.
And yet
BEING A PAL
my parents were so strict I
could never get really near
them. had a lonely child
hood. like most of us did, in
our generation. I know now
that they felt they had to be
that way-didn't dare act like
human beings before their chill
dren But, of course, I didn't
understand that then. And
vowed that if ever I had chill
dren I'd be different.
IT made up my mind I
wouldn't have any barriers be-
tween myself and my young
sters. wouldn't expect respect
just because I was a parent
or gratitude for doing what was
my plain duty by them. I
wouldn't pretend to know every
thing, either. I was going to be
one of them
"DOYOU THINK WE HAVE
DONE A FAVOR TO EITHER
OUR CHILDREN OR OUR
SELVES BY STEPPING DOWN
TO THEIR LEVEL?
BUT, HONESTLY, I OFTEN
WO1@DER IF THEY WOULDN'T
BE BETTER PREPARED FOR
LIFE-WOULDN'T BE BET
TER CITIZENS SOME DAY
IF I HAD KEPT A LITTLE
DISTANCE B ETW ZEN US,
HAD REMAINED A MOTHER
INSTEAD OF "A PAL!
Il suppose youth is always
intolerant. I know was. But
my parents forced me to realize
the value of a dollar, and to
respect the struggles and sac
rifices that were required to
earn it. And you're supposed
to be an 'old-fashioned nag if
you even mention such things
to children today.
"You and I know that there
are three feelings every decent
person should have GRAFT
TUDE, RESPECT and PITY.
BUT HOW MANY MODERN
PARENTS TEACH THEIR
CHILDREN RESPECT, GRAFT
The Washington times., 1935-04-03

cover every part of a lunar day.
One strip moved three miles
toward the north, combining
with another strip. Another
moved two miles in a north
westerly direction in less than
two days, indicating an aver
age movement of three and
one-half feet per minute. The
daily advance in different di-
rections eliminates the posi-
bility of their being shadows.
Professor Pickering will not
venture an explanation Of this
appearance of motion. The
Moon has no atmosphere that
we can observe. It has no
water, and, unimpeded by at
mosphere, the Sun blazeS down
upon it raising the tempera-
ture nearly to that of boiling
water, holding it there for two
weeks. During the next two
weeks the temperature goes
down to a more intense cold
than we know on Earth. IN
der these conditions, what can
it be that appears to move?
SOME EXPLANATIONS
Swarms of some sort of hardy
insect could give the effect
which Prof. Pickering describes.
Here on earth we have sWarms
Of locusts so miles long by 10
miles wide which discolor the
surface to an extent that would
be visible from the Moon. How
ever, though the process Of eVo-
luton might develop a living
organism that could exist with.
out an atmosphere, we have no
experience with any such form
Of life, and cannot accept this
insect explanation.
Another explanation offered
is that Prof. Pickering has
been watching a low form Of
The Washington times., 1935-04-03
Laugh, Doctor, Laugh!
By Nelson Harding
BIZ Robert BenchLey

They're at 1t again in the
Harvard Psychological Labora-
tory-dissecting jokes to de-
termine what makes people
laugh. Just as soon as they get
it settled, they can close up the
laboratory and clean up in the
entertainment racket. There's
big money in that secret. boys!
Will Rogers, w. c. Fields,
Eddie Cantor and a lot of other
oldtimers have been working on
it in a more or less haphazard
fashion for years, yet I'll bet
they're hanging breathless on
the decision from the Harvard
laboratory. There isn't anyone
so big that he couldn't use an
absolutely sure-fire gag now and
then.
The Washington times., 1935-04-03
i. S. Needs Such Men
BIZ James T. Williams, Jr.

napoliS the law authorized a
maximum of five appointees as
midShipmen in the United
States Naval Academy for each
member of Congress. Under this
authorization the actual num-
Der of such appointeeS recently
has been increased from three
to four. The House Committee
on Appropriations has heartily
Endorsed the appeal of the Presi.
dent for the forgotten youth
who yearns for the opportunity
to serve the colors that an ap-
pointment to West Point would
give.
In its report on the Army ap-
preparation bill this year the
committee said it would have
provided for the additional ap-
pointmentS to West Point which
the President is asking had the
rules of the House permitted.
There must be, however, under
the rules, an authorization by
the House before the small
amount required can be appro-
priated.
When the Sheppard authori-
Zation bill passes the Senate it
will then be up to the House to
say whether West Point shall be
permitted to train the addi-
tional few hundreds for whom
accommodations now exist or
whether pork barrel politics
shall bar these young men at a
time when thousands of Amer
leans have been compelled to
leave school or college due to
the self denialS compelled by
the depression.
OPEN TIE DOORS
Two days before his death
in 1899, writing to Alexander
Hamilton, George Washington
said:
"The establishment Of . mill
tary academy upon a respect
able and extensive basis has
ever been considered by me an
object of primary Importance
to the country and while
was in the chair Of Govern.
ment omitted no proper Op-
pOrtunity of recommending it
to the attention Of the legis-
lature."
In urging the Congress to
open the doors of West Point
to the forgotten youth whom
the depression is cheating out
of a higher education, Pres
ident Roosevelt is following
where the Father Of his Coun-
try led the way.
Never did the times more de-
mand than now the kind of
men who incarnate the spirit
of West Point throughout their
earthly pilgrimage.
Men 1Dhom the lust OF Of
flee cannot kill, men lOhom
the SpoilS of office cannot buy,
men 1Oho possess opinions and
a will, men 1Uho haze honor,
men Who tDiH not lie, men 1Dho
can stand before a demGgogue,
and Scorn his tredcherous Dir
tues Without blinking, tall men
Sun-croWned, Who liUe Gbove
the fog in public duty and in
priUdte thinking.
copyright, 1895, The Washington Times)
The Washington times., 1935-04-03
Not a ''Tin Hat Town

Fortunately the beauty of the Federal Triangle Pre
dent Roosevelt vetoed the idea of Tin hat for the
Archives Building.
Credit due the Fine Arts Commission for its dapproval
of Treasury Departments proposal the nearly COM
pleted Archives Building with cheap roof The Treasury
Department proposed the tin roof utility measure, to
provide space papers, but the Commission OBJ
eced the ground that would spoil the beauty Of the
building
be any n hats Pennsylvania Avenue at least in the
triangle group.
The Washington times., 1935-04-03

God giUe US men. Times like
these demand strong minds,
great hearts, true faith, and
steady hands.
President Roosevelt has ad-
dressed to the Congress an
appeal that will quicken the
hearts and raise the hopes of
every father and mother in the
country with a son whom they
would be proud to see trained
in that school Of character
whose motto is DUTY, Honour,
Country"
The President has asked the
Congress to provide for an
additional number of cadets at
the United States Military
Academy at West Point. In
the Senate a quick response
to this request has been made.
The bill introduced by Senator
Sheppard of Texas, chairman
of the Senate Committee on
Military Affairs, has been unan-
imouSly reported to the Senate
with a recommendation that it
pass.
OPPORTUNITY
The purpose of this bill is
to increase the number Of
cadets at the Military Academy
by allowing each Senator and
Representative and Delegate
in Congress three instead of
only two appointments, five
instead of four from the Dis
trict of Columbia and an in
crease of 10 from the United
States at large. In its report
the Senate committee, of which
the senior Senator from Texas
is the able and patriotic chair.
man, says:
can increase in the number
Of cadets at the Military AGA
DENY has been frequently rec
commended. The Academy has
never even Appropriated the
development it should have. 1t
has approximately 1000 cadets.
There are now comparable in
StitutionS of learning which
have 10000 all-time Students
'"The Military Academy and
the Naval Academy are the apo
theosiS of our public school sys-
tenn. If that system, on which we
pride ourselves so much, means
anything, then, as our popuIa-
ton and its demand for educa-
ton increases, so should these
two great democratic institu-
tionS of learning. The commit
tee believes it a mistake to not
fully utilize the possibilities of
West Point to the great benefit
of the nation.
"Under existing law the num-
Der of appointees as members of
the corps of cadets at the United
States Military Academy au.
thoriZed for each member of
Congress is now limited to two.
This number, together with
Presidential appointments, per-
mitS an average Of only $50
graduates each year, which is
not only insufficient for the
Army, but fails to take advan.
tage of the possibilities of the
Military Academy"
In the case Of the United
States Naval Academy at An
The Washington times., 1935-04-03
An American Heroine

Seventyx Americans ten of them have been named
as eligible for election to Americas Hall of Fame
One of the has the strange name sacawea She was
Indian who guided the explorers Lewis and Clark on
their wandering through the Western wilderness in pioneer
days.
If the strange to you it will be worth your while
find all about this truly American heroine And about
every one of the 75 other famous Americans.
Every and child in this country should IN these
times Of international strengthen true Americanism by
learning about the persons who helped create this country
The Washington times., 1935-04-03

JUDE OR PITY? ana now
many modern children have
those qualities?
GOOD PARENT?
mine haven't-I'm ashamed
to admit. They're charming,
friendly, not any more selfish
than other youngsters. But
they haven't a serious idea in
their heads. Sometimes I
have a horrible idea that
they're simply delightful little
savages.
Have II wonder-been a
good parent? Or are parents
like me the worst thing that
could happen to a youngster?"
I pass. YOU answer her.
Copyright 1885. by King Features
Syndicate, Incl
The Washington times., 1935-04-03

1GAdS IOA4Su P'
his customary cigar in the corner
of his mouth and inquired Of
colleague:
"What are we considering?"
The answer was:
81 don't know"
Said Dies:
"Well, they should throw it
all in the river!"
One Huey P. Long. "King-
fish" of Louisiana, Sands Point
socialite and Senate satellite,
has written another book.
The edition is not ready for
sale as yet, however.
Huey is undetermined what
title should be used.
He first selected the title:
"My First Year in the White
House."
Now he is considering calling
it:
my Revolution"
Representative Hamilton Fish,
IT,, of NeD York, is making an
appeal for erection of an equeS-
trinn statue of Gen. Robert E.
Lee at Arlington. Va.
Coming from Fish, this seems
rather strange in view Of the
fact that the New Yorker, one
of the most ardent Republicans,
introduces a resolution asking
for a statue Of the leader Of
the Confederate Army.
The Washington times., 1935-04-03

Ian, De m o.
crat, of New
York, told the
poet that at
the first OPP
portunity he
was going to
ask the House
for unanimous
on S e n t to
have NEGRO
arty reel t e
some of his
poetry.
Nc Groarty
said he didn't
W ant to do
The Washington times., 1935-04-03
In the World of Science
BIZ Hiram Perez Maxim

vegetation develop. We have
reason to believe that Moon
once had both atmosphere and
water, but, owing to its small
mass, and correspondingly low
gravitational pull, could not
hold it's atmosphere, and it
diffused away into outer space.
The surface is literally pep
pered with craterS. If they are
of volcanic origin, some Of them
very possibly are still discharg'
ing water vapor and carbon
dioxide gas. This moisture and
gas conceivably might have
kept alive a low order of vege-
tation and it may be the spread
ing of this which gives the ap-
parent movement Pickering re-
ports.
The great speed of the spread
ing, while not likely on Earth,
could be possible on Moon
where the days are two weeks
long and the temperature very
high.
Were this a vegetable type of
life, the two weeks Of cold
might freeze the moisture and
end the growing season, causing
the vegetation to dry up and
fade in color. Then, the two
weeks of hot daylight came
again, the ice would thaw, the
moisture resume discharging,
and the growing start again.
The stars would occur at the
fissure discharging this mois-
ture, progressing outward,
changing color as it's life re-
turned. This would give exactly
the effect of a dark strip ad-
vancing.
ON THE THRESHOLD
Prof. Pickering reports that
in the EratoStheneS crater the
changes in color are absolutely
regular, and he is able to pre-
dict what is going to appear as
each lunar season approaches.
He no doubt knows more about
the landscape of the moon than
any living man, having special
lied on it for 80 years at Harv-
ard observatorieS in Cambridge
and Arequipa, Peru, and his
private observatory on the
island Of Jamaica.
He believes we are on the
threshold of many astonishing
lunar discoveries, and looks for
ward to the completion Of the
great 200-inch telescope through
which the visual distance will be
cut in half. With this tele-
scope we shall see the moon as
it would look at a distance Of
only 1850 miles.
Copyright 1885. by King Features
Syndicate, Inc.)
Articles by Mr.. Maxim ap-
pear each Monday, Wednesday
and Friday. The subject Of the
next will be Sunlight Exerts
Enormous preSSure.'1
The Washington times., 1935-04-03

E m m a. s
one Of those
y o ung, mod
ern mothers.
H a d h er
babies young,
and now, at
80, looks like
the Low re ly,
liv ely, older
sister Of her
16 a n d 49,
y e a r-old
Y o ungSters,
r o S e a n d
Bert,
Ev ry one
roUnc q o11t
The Washington times., 1935-04-03

Congress is
awe-inspiring.
Not so long
ago members
in their Of
ficeS W e r e
summoned to
the floor by
bells signal
ing a record
vote.
Coming up
on an ele-
vator young
r e p reSenta-
tive Martin
Dies CD of
Tnxos rolled
The Washington times., 1935-04-03

that. "Onn D. "0
He broke into poetry the other
day, however, with the lines:
$50 many minds, 50 many
creedS,
So many ways that wind and
wind,
When all the help this sad
world needs
Is just the art Of being kind"
Copyright 1885. The Washington
Times
The Washington times., 1935-04-03

move a meas
ura BILE dis
lance e a C h
night. One
of tn e S e
S t rips, h e
says, must be
en- mil e S
long by five
hundred feet
wide. For sew
eral years he
h q S m a d e
drawings of
what he has
S e e n, a n d
these draw
~ &C ~ w
The Washington times., 1935-04-03
Listen, World
Blu Elsie Robinson

Do Modern Parents ''DO
Right By" Their Children?
I've been thinking all day
about something Emma White
said last night.
The Washington times., 1935-04-03
Something MOvin
Moon

There is something moving
on the Moon, according to the
American astronomer, Prof. w.
H. Pickering. Across the floor
of the crater Eratosthenes, he
reports, dark colored strips
The Washington times., 1935-04-03

The reverence which some :
of our national legislators have
for legislation pending in
The Washington times., 1935-04-03
OLD FAVORITES
BY James Jeffrey Roche

# BY James Jeffrey Roche
Oh, if the world were mine, Love,
I'd give the world for thee!
Alas! there is sign, Love,
Of that contingency.
Were a king-whch isn't
To be considered now
dadem had glistened
Upon that lovely brow.
Had fame with laurels crowned me
She hasn't, up to date
Nor time change had found me
To love and thee Migrate
If Death threw down his gage, Love-
Though life is dear to me,
I'd die, cen of old age Love,
To win smile from thee.
But being poor, part dear,
And love- sweet love, must die;
Thou wilt not break thy heart, dear,
No more I think, shall II
Re1ders are nVted to send to the editor their sugges-
tios of old fGvortes among the poems for repriting in
this sp0ce)
The Washington times., 1935-04-03

Articles by Mr.. Maxim ap-
pear each Monday, Wednesday
and Friday. The subject Of the
next will be Sunlight Exerts
Enormous Pressure
Askov American. [volume] (Askov, Pine County, Minn.) 1914-current, 1935-10-17
FROM EXCHANGES
Editorial Comment From Other News
papers. Which May or Nay Not
Conform with the Opinions
of the AskOv Ameriran.)
PROSPERITY IN SWEDEN
AND WHYe
minnesota Leader)

Sweden is today the most prosper
Gus country in Europe and with the
highest standard of living. The other
Scandinavian countries are not far be-
hind. With the rest of Europe, large
ly, war-frenzied under dictators and
despots. Sweden goes serenely on its
way. years and years ahead, econom-
ically and socially, of the rest of the
world: the dear old U. S. A. included.
This situation did not just happen.
There is cause and reason for it all.
In Sweden for years the government
ownership of public utilities and cleo
trio power has been a reality, not just
a dream. Government there has also
taken over control of the sale of to-
bacco and liquor. and much of the
great forest and mineral resources of
Sweden are government-control
The country teens with both producer
and consumer cooperatives; and to be
sure that the benefits of their labor
their culture and their civilization
will not be fleeced from its people by
the Shylocks of money, the govern
ment of Sweden controls its own
money.