Evening star., 1935-03-12
The Halfway Mark
Examination
The Sun Dial

DR.. Roosevelt .- Well. you've
been under treatment two years
now, Sam.
Sam-Yes. and It doesn't seem
day less.
DR.. Roosevelt-How's your ap-
petite?
Sam-It's good. but I'm afraid
to open my mouth TO eat.
DR.. Roosevelt-Why?
Sam-Every time I do II the
nurses throw in some more pills.
DR.. Roosevelt-You're not as
sick as you were when I took
over your case. my boy.
sam-Maybe I'm Just getting
used to it.
DR.. ROOSEVELT think your
Improvement is very real. For
'one thing. you have pep and are
more interested in what's going
on around you:
Sam-With so much going on
around me. how could I help be-
ing interested Say. are you
satisfied with my progress?
DR.. Roosevelt-Well, to tell the
truth. I had expected you would
be up by this time
Sam-Every time I start to get
up the internes rush in and be-
gin working on me again.
DR.. Roasevelt-They're trying
to make a new man of you. Sam.
Sam-The newer they make
me the older feel. Why don't
you give me few old-fashioned
remedies and leave me alone?
DR.. Roosevelt don't believe
in old-fashioned remedies.
Sam-They always worked in
the past.
DR.. Roosevelt-The cure was
only temporary.
Sam-I always felt better than
do under this hunt for a per-
manent cure, Doc.
DR.. Roosevelt-What we are
trying to do Is TO get at the root
of things.
Sam-Now I understand why
the staff is working on me with
everything from spade to a
hydraulic drill!
DR.. Roosevelt-It isn't fair to
criticize me when am doing all
! can.
Sam-You mean we'll. doctor:
but you are covering too much
territory in treating one case.
Would you like to have me ex-
plain?
DR.. Roosevelt-By all means.
Sam-well. it's like this: have
sudden collapse and have to
take to my bed. If you were
satisfied to get me on my feet
it would be fine. but you call in
a flock of young internes and
start trying to make me immune
from everything from falling
hair and astigmatism to hook
worm and yellow fever 1t is as
if had a bad attack of in
fluenza and the entire hospital
staff concentrated on giving me
serums to cure snakebite, hay
fever and gallstones.
DR.. Roosevelt-Yes, but
Sam-Don't interrupt! The
way I feel about 1t is that I've
had a bad attack Of gout COM
plicated by jitters as result Of
high living. and that the doctors
have decided to amputate both
legs and remove all my teeth so
/ won't get around and eat so
much rich food.
Dr. Roosevelt-You're exag-
gerating.
Sam-In my condition it's i'm
possible to exaggerate. If you'll
ease up on the treatments you'll
find I'll be my old self in no
time.
DR.. Roosevelt-But If ease
up. think Of all the patent medi-
cine men and wild-eyed herb
doctors who are waiting for a
chance to rush in and take over
your case.
Sam-Once I began to feel
healthy I'd slam the door in
their faces. It's the fact I'm a
little weak that gives those birds
encouragement
DR.. Roosevelt-Maybe there Is
something in what you say. Sam.
May tell you something con-
fidentially?
Sam-Sure.
DR.. Roosevelt-1'm beginning
to think you're right. I'm think
ing seriously of trusting your
recovery more to nature and less
to new medicines.
Sam-That's fine. Say, Doc.
do you think I'll be out Of bed
in another two years?
Dr.. Roosevelt-I dunno, but IL
you're not I'll have to get In
With you!
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