Voice of action. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1933-1936, 1935-01-04

PERSONALLY, L haven't mucn SYM
patty with them. ] don't see why
they can't realize this Is the land
of opportunity and go about
their business instead of always
bowling they're hungry
Fourth Brain Truster: 1T
seems to me / can remember a
year or two ago they were howl
ing for a slx-hour day"
First Brain Truster: mo, that
was their mistake. That wasn't
the convictions of the whole fiji
teen million OF them. They were
egged ON then by few subvers-
i've Communists who were trying
to destroy the country. We gave
them to understand that all
good Americans either work eight
hours day or starye. These I'M
employed are selfish beasts any
way. All they think of is their
stomachs."
Third Brain Truster climbing
up a step higher than his two
colleagues, he strikes an heroic
pose and makes wide gesture
toward the point from where the
rumble issuesl: Gentlemen, L
present you with our last great
American surplus. We've cut
down the number OF hogs, the
number of loaves of bread, the
number of everything, but the
unemployed surplus remains
with us. If we could just get rid
of that surplus the country would
be back at normal again, and
prosperity would be just around
the corner.
First Brain Truster: We've
only got to get rid of that surplus
OF unemployed. Then the country
won't have very much of anything
left"
Fourth Brain Truster: Maybe
If we hadn't of destroyed the sur
plus hogs, beef, wheat and so on
there would be enough to feed
them"
Third Brain Truster (indig-
nantlyl: And indeed, if there
was still surplus of food stuffs
left like it was before we started
in, how do you think unemploy-
ed men are going to get the
money to buy these things?"
oecUnu brain Truster tan unis
while he has been fiddling around
with his alphabet blocks, arrang-
ing combination after combina-
tion of letters, until suddenly a
wild glad look appears on his
face and he jumps to his feet
crying Justify: UCLA, UCLA,
UCLA, UCLA!"
Other Brain Trusters: What
are you talking about? Sounds
like the college you taught home
economics at before you got a
job planning national economy"
Second Brain Truster: 'UCLA
will bring back prosperity. I've
hit it! Our last great surplus
will be taken care of"
First Brain Truster: "How are
you goin' to work it?"
Second Brain Truster: by u.s.
ing the same principle we used
when we reduced the cotton,
wheat, oats, timothy, barley,
pork, and other SURPRISES. Plow
the surplus under. That's what
UCLA stands for"
Brain Trusters in chorus:
"What?"
Second Brain Truster: Don't
you see? UCLA stands for Un-
employed Citizens Liquidation
Administration. Like the Agri-
cultural Adjustment Administra-
tion, well put the surplus unem-
ployed under the ground
There is vast profound pause
while the Brain Trusters regard
each other with an understand
ing Light
Fourth Brain Truster: What a
plan! What a planl What a plan!
And it will give the army the
practice it's been yelling for"
Third Brain Truster: And Du-
Points will be tickled to death!"
First Brain Truster: "And Ii
quidated unemployed won't feel
hungry any more either. Every
1body will be bettered."
Fourth Brain Truster: "Condi-
ions will be fundamentally sound
again"
Third Brain Truster: 1--WE have
arrived at the root of all evil"
Second Brain Truster: Our
national economy will be balanc-
ed again."
First Brain Truster: Prospect
ty is just around the corner"
Fourth Brain Truster: This
plan is a stroke of geniusl"
THE Brain Trusters place
hands on each others shoulders
and start marching up the street
toward the War Department
Building in a lock-step.J
Chorus Of Brain Trusters: Now
well go get the armyl"
Curtain-Curtain- For Pete's
sake, let's have the curtainD