The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1935-07-01
Of Course They Wouldn't Knou

THE Mayor of Stamford Alfred N phiIIins &c a
l. member of the old grass roots milk of magnesia
family and the leading citizens include a number
OF grass roots manufacturers of locks, brass ware
CLOCKS and small arms. These small arms it should
De stated are manufactured strictly for the protec-
ZION OF the American home against burglars ANY
tme a weapon is discovered in the possession of a
lawless character that is unavoidable error, due
10 the increasing diSrespect for authority and bad
nome influences and much deplored by the manu-
tacturerS. Can an honest manufacturer help it il
oehlzenS OF the underworld tell deliberate false
hoods, pretending that they want weapons to defend
their homes when it is their secret purpose to go out
and stick up gas stations and banks?
1t is Senator Longs plan to send a mechanical
oahd-Wagon on ahead to play patriotic selections
on monograph equipped with a loud speaker in
Guiding his own national anthem, Whats Yours is
Nine After tour of the neighborhood including
the estates around Greenwich, OK Ridge and New
canaan and the yacht clubs country clubs and hunt
clubs the band wagon will lead the procession back
TO the scene OF the oration wherever that NAV be-
The Senator will then appear amid cheers led bv
Huey P Long, in person. with gathering of yachts
men utter1ng their native cry of DELAY" and the
golfers, IN their quaint costumes bowling their
mournful cry of fore" The huntSmens call is
yolcks Yoicks practically extinct in the region
but they still dress up in their scarlet Jackets and
holler "yoicks, yoicks,' when there are no yoicks
HHeys Been There Before
MOT all the residents of the countryside are
aroused the same way the proposed ap-
peaIance Oh the Senator. Many of the brokers pro-
meters, manufacturers and retired grass roots cap
ltallsts are now in favor of any project which
promises to divide little wealth with them They
would all like it much better, however if he would
come to them with proposal to divide the taxes
instead Of the wealth because the majority of this
class in Senator Longs first New England stand
have no function in the civic life of the community
but to pay taxes using Stamford and vicinity strictly
a bedroom
Hundreds of them spend their days in New York,
toiing for money with which to support the govern
ment and the increasing horde of deserving DEM
ocrats. New York taxes them for the privilege Of
earning their money there and Connecticut taxes
them for the privilege of spending it in Connecticut
If Senator Long is aiming at the distribution of their
wealth he will find that New York and Connecticut
have beaten him to it by several years.
By a strange circumstance one of the public
parks in which Senator Longs local manager wished
to hold the meeting of July Is lies slaunchwise
across Long Island Sound but in plain view on
clear day, of Sands Point the scene the historic
battle of the gents This was tactless blum
der on the part of the Senator's manager and it
may have been a genuine kindness of Mayor Phillips
of the grass roots patent medicine family to shunt
him away from a possible reminder of that unhappy
incident.
1t would be much pleasanter in Muddy Greek
full of old rubber tires, baby carriages and wash
boards park.
Copyright 1895. by United Feature Syndicate. Incl