The Waterbury Democrat., 1934-03-30

There are several things to keep in mind concerning the growing boy or girl. The masculine is used most frequently in these arr ticles for reasons of convenience but with some small differences "she" conforms largely to the same pattern.
 We must not forget first of all that there is Q "pull' in the child Natural instinct is in constant bat tie with the social. After all so- cial standards arer those set by man and not by nature.
 He has certain instinctive judgment of right and wrong, but 1t has not even 0 speaking ac- quaintance for awhile with the let us call them-artificial tenets of organized society. its favorito morals, manners and prejudices. The Mal-Adjustcd Child There is in every child this un- conscious conflict between the two, but in some children 1t is more apparent. The completely mal-adjusted child is one of the greatest clinic problems today. 1t means that he cannot accept his particular environment and shows it in unusual behavior.
 Another thing that older people forget, if they have ever thought bout 1t at all, is that childhood is the time without perfect wal ues". There is little tolerance, for i instance. Tolerance comes with years of practice. Therefore pa tience, the child of tolerance, will not be one of his strong points. Reason and judgment do not blossom overnight, either. We go to our graves with this very thing still wanting perfection in us. Too many things interfere. Our emo- tions are the enemies of reason. Number three is this: The child must "fced" his impulses. They are stronger now than will-power. His mind is tyrant of sort and insists on a thousand experiences. His developing self-prohibitions will usually tone down his more venturesomc impulses, but not al- ways. He is too likely to act first and think later.
 Fourthly. every child senses some injustice in both home and school jurisdiction, often Justified, sometimes not, but we are speak ing of motives behind conduct. As a matter of fact, behavior and con- but for general purposes they are used interchangeahly.
 The Anger Habit
 Fifthly, certain emotions in the childhood stage are rather stark and raw. Anger flares quickly, often over very little, and chooses ways to liberate itself that antag- onize others instantly. The anger habit grows. This in itself is a problem. It should slow down rather than increase if conditions are right, but it is fathered by deeplying causes, and sometimes they are difficult to fathom.
 Curiosity consumes him too. All manner of what we call bad con- duct must be laid to it's door.
 One could go on almost indefi- nitely. The motives behind be- havior are not only interesting but important. If a mother might realize that her strenuous boy cam not be weighed in standard scales and judged impartially, it would be better. But it is highly desir- able for fathers to think about, too, because fathers so often jump to conclusions.
 Fear of punishment may curb the child's too liberal expression of self" and discipline must play it's part. But fear is like a grub at the root of plant. It stops growth and kills the good with the bad. A good healthy fear com bined with respect of the law is not destructive, but some fear IS worse than anger in its destruc- ton of mental and physical tissue. An understanding parent will not attempt to substitute poison for antidOte,