The Washington times., 1934-12-03

my 1884 All-America football
selections have never seen play.
II I had, some of them probably
wouldn't be there. 1t would be
Just my luck to have to watch
them have the worst day of their
careers. Last season I put two
Pacific coast players I had never
seen on my first all-team. One
Of them was from Stanford, the
other from U. S. C.
It happened that I later
had a chance to see them play.
Or rather, that I covered games.
in which they were on the play.
In field. Both looked like
couple of outsiders who had just
been loaned by the coach to
round out the eleven.
My All-America choice from
Stanford spent most of so min
utes sitting down with a dazed
look on his hanSome pan. But
I assure him, and you, that he
wasn't any more dazed than I
was up there in the press box
peering at him through an excel
lent pair of field glasses.
Better on Bench
But my all-America choice
from U. S. c. was even worse
when it became my fortune to
see him in action. Indeed, he
would have been far more help
to his team if he also had spent
the so minutes of the games
sitting down-on the bench.
am pointing out the futility
Of all all-America selections.
They are nice gestures to the
kids who have gone through a
tough grind of training and on
the average of eight hard
games.
Naturally, I have the Gus
tomary number of letters, tele.
grams and personal tips about
such and such from so and so,
who just can't be kept off any
''honest" all-America team. And
why on earth would anybody
want to pick a dishonest all
America?
OF late the boosters have got
80 they don't wait to write any
more. They rush to the nearest
telegraph office right after the
game and wire you all about
Hoosis' spectacular performance
against Old SiWaSh.
Like Fight Managers
It's like the fight managers
of another era, when the first
guy to the wire got the decision
in the next town, even though
0t the same moment he was
sending the telegram, tender
hands were assembling his
fighter, piece by piece, and try
ing to fit him together again
like jigsaw puzzle.
Also like the press box an
nouncer of those colleges that
have an All-America candidate.
"SmOOchums is now carrying
the ball." he will below in your
ear through his dandy little
megaphone. "Smoochums gains
20 yards through tackle"
Whereupon you look at the
number of the guy carrying the
ball, consult your official pro-
gram, and discover that in
reality the fellow who made the
run wasn't considered impor.
tant enough to list. And, fur
ther, that the moment
Smoochums is limping out Of
the park on his way home to
warm supper.
So I say. pay no attention to
this all-America. It is as good
as yours, and as good as the
next fellows, and there are a
hundred thousand other like it.
Put all these nice healthy young
men together on the same team
and they might spell alphabet
soup.
Picked Garbisch
At least twice I remember sit
ting in press boxes watching a
fellow named Adam Walsh. of
Notre Dame, making a chap
named Ed GarbiSch, of Army,
look like Adams own little Eva.
But was Adam the first man on
that seasons All-Americas? No,
you guessed it Mr.. Shean, the
first man was Ed Garbisch.
You will find the giant Reyn-
oldS, of Stanford, and the giant
Stee, of Syracuse, on most star
teams this fall. But against
Columbia in the Rose Bown and
at Bakerfield, this year, the diff
ficulty was not in finding the
young men in Blue and White
who were playing opposite the
MeSsrS. Reynolds and Steen,
respectfully. The difficulty was
in finding the Messrs. Reynolds
and Steen. The difference being
~RY~RY~ RRY ~