The Waterbury Democrat., 1934-10-06
In New York
By PAUL HARRISON

New 4Ork.--SOmS or tuS uVISl
 men, who seem to have recovered
 their sense of humor at the con-
 clusion of a fairly prosperous sum-
 mer tourist season, have been tell.
 ing me few stories.
 One concerns the two daughters
 of fine old southern family who
 came to New York, wide-eyed and pnaccompanied. to buy . supply
 of fall clothes. They chose rather
 iavishly, however, and on the last day of their intended stay found they had no money for their hotel
 bill. This Frightened them because they knew their father would
 storm about their extravaganza if
 they wired him for money. So
 they wired their mother. and sat down to wait. Nothing happened that day or the next. On the third day they wired again. and the hotel began to wonder whether 1t had a couple of adventuresses on
 its hands.
 On the fourth day special de- livery letter arrived from the dear old lady, who knew nothing of
 money matters or their urgency. Enclosed was a generous check which the girls triumphantly pre-
 sented at the desk. The cashier looked at them strangely and pushed it back. The check was signed simply Mother" {:
 KEY TO MIxUP
 Then there's the tale of the visit | ing manufacturer from Indiana. Cameto town on a business trips and went to . theater in the eve. ing. Strolled back toward his hotel, asked for the key to room 1212- an easily remembered numbef-- and went up to retire. When he switched on the light he was start. led to find the room strewn with garments definitely feminine. And I of his own luggage there wasn't g trace.
 He went down to the room clerk brandishing his key and sputtering threats. It was several minutes before they got him straightened out. Seems he was registered in room 1212, all right but in another hotel . couple of blocks down the street.
 
 O1E E1OmAOx
 During the dinner dancing at an uppity Madison avenue hostelry. guests began to look askance at a prominent and rather portly New Yorker who was waltzing around with his vest tinbuttoned. Doubt l less he was unaware of it, but 1t was very untidy, and something had to be done. They'd have to be diplomatic. though, for this guest was as well-known for his tasty temper as for his wealth. While the
 head waiter and his captains were discussing the delicate situation they saw the waiter assigned to the l guests table say something to the big man, and then they saw the latter buttoning his vest. That was very well handled" said the head waiter to his under. ling waiter. "what did you say to the gentleman?"
 "Nothin' to it," boasted the
 serving man. "I just walks up and says, Better button that vest, buddy. Where do you think you are-on Tenth avenue?"
 THE UNwELcoME GUEST  Because it 90 aptly fits in here (and because l heard 1t before the New Yorker magazine printed it)s I've got to tell how the manage ment of another hotel rid its cock. tail room of q tipsy woman. She
 not only was pretty but pretty well
 into her cups, and was flirting with all the males in the place. She re- fused to accept the yelled suggcs. tions of the head. waiter: just sat there and downed one Martini after another, meanwhile demor- alizing the establishments gentility of tone.
 There was q whispered confer. ence of officials. They called over a handsome young waiter, who listened attentively. nodded ana vanished. Ten minutes later. dressed in street clothes, he walked in the front door and was shown to a table near that of the unde- sirable patron. She ogied. and he ogled right back. Then he went over and suggested they so to an. other bar he knew of. She rose without a protest. At the curb ne handed her into a cab. slammed | the door, gave the driver a dollar and barked an address. A few minutes afterward in walters clothes, he was back at his serv- tnO +A