Evening star., 1934-04-15


JAMES L. WRIGHT.
-Harris-Ewing Photo
to run the Republican team on Dem
ocratic errors.
Snell-Will Herbert be with us?
Hastings-We've asked waivers on
him and he's going into the Coast
League.
Snell-There's Charley Curtis; how
about him?
Nye-Charley horse! Haven't we
any hitters left since you fellows lost
us Kid Norris and his gang?
Snell-You mean since you fellows
sent George Moses and Jim Watson
to the bushes.
Political Janus"
Senator Vandenberg. Michigan, en-
tered. He had on uniform divided,
half Republican, half Democrat.
Seeing this, the Democrats left the
sheltering palms and, together with
the Republicans, grouped around Van
denberg.
What in the world is this?" asked
Hasting, pointing at the uniform.
What do you think you're playing
in. circus?" queried Farley.
NO" replied Vandenberg, "just
politics. You got to play with both
sides out in my State this year"
That's true in every State" in
terjected Tydings, while the crowd
yelled yes, yes" .....-'.
Where do you get uniforms like
that?" asked McKellar.
AT the White House." retorted
Vandenberg, as they all ran out
shouting I'm gonna get one"
"Quoth the Pirate"
The scene shifted quickly From
balmy Florida, the audience became
sea-minded as pirate took the center
of the stage preliminary to the in
PRODUCTION, as speaker, of Senator
Reed. who laments the passing of
the Constitution under the new deal
Quoth the pirate in villanous tones
Aye, tear her tattered ensign down,
Long it has been the law;
And Hoover, Coolidge, Harding, Taft,
No better ever saw.
Aye. pile her with amendments high
And shove her from the shore
The admiralty says she's unsafe
BY vote of five to fourl
Her deck, once piled with Tory spoils
And Democratic slaves,
When pirates of the G. o. P.
Were rulers of the waves,
No more shall feel the victor's heel
Or ever be the same
AS when the Wall Street pilots steered
And plundered in her name.
Farewell, farewell, o shattered hulk
And battered stern and prov
In youth you well protected us,
We'll sing your requiem now.
Look! Faltering there her threadbare
Against the horizon shrunk;
She founders in the new deal galeI
The Constitution's-sunk!"
With demoniacal laughter, he de-
parted.
A Storm Approaches.
Thunder, lightning, wind, a food
The land is being engulfed in new
theories, new practices, new statutes
Terror is abroad and the Marine
Band storms. A background of an
historic episode. modernized, Noah's
Ark. Noah is Everett Sanders, Re-
publican National Committee chair
man. He entered with Ogden Mills,
former Secretary of the Treasury
who in all the gloomy outlook finds
a cheering word
Perhaps" he told Sanders, ION
this stout craft we'll be able to keep
afloat until this socialistic flood
subsidies
Came aboard two by two the pas
sengers, carefully selected from among
those who represent sound, conserva-
tive principles. They included Will
liam Randolph Hearst and Mabel
Walker Wnlebrandt, Claudius Huston
and Gen. Dawes, Ham Fish and
Emma Goldman, Albert H. Wiggin
and Clara Bow, AL Capone and DR..
Nicholas Miraculous" Butler, Jimmie
Walker and Mrs. Margaret Sanger,
George w. Wickersham and Bishop
Cannon, Mark Sullivan and Aimee
Semple Mcpherson, Edward Everett
Gam and Queen Marie of Rumania
and j. Pierpont Morgan and Little
Friend, a midget. A soloist and the
chorus sang about the little midget
who played the market, but cautioned
him to be wise and stay home.
Mr.. Mills recalled with panied ex-
preston that he remembered when
it was a source of public mirth fol
the President to establish a new com.
mission. He regretted the Republicans
had made the mistake of not CAPT.
talizlng the alphabet But a songstel
with more philosophical view and
looking ahead 100 years, sang:
Don't save your dollars, Just pas.
them around.
You'll find the reason is logical,
sound,
Who's going to know where theil
cash will be found
A hundred years from today"
AS the storm clouds cleared. the
ark's occupants prepared to land on
Mount Ararat with Chairman San
ders convinced that Franklin "ain't
going to reign no more"
DIR. Writ Next.
DR.. William A. Writ of Gary, Ind.
and his charges against the brain
trust that they were planning to
revolutionize America were not over
looked. !.
While one member of the clut
called up distinguished guests, another
replied for the guests when they were
asked what they had told DR.. Writ
about the red revolution.
The Ambassador of the Union OF
Soviet Socialist Republics was called
and the inquiry made to him what
he had said to DR.. Writ. A club
member replied:
1.-The Soviet Ambassador said tc
DR.. Writ. Isn't it great to be home
againl'"
The pathetic plight of American
diplomats abroad, owing to the .de-