davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The times-news. [volume] (Hendersonville, N.C.) 1927-current, 1934-04-14
| THOUGHTS OF
A FISHERMAN
BY
Ike Walton, Redivivus

Brother Franklin and l have
tecn fishing (and l have been
digging too) for the last couple
OF weeks and left congress and
Brother Fain and Bro. Wambolt
and the other columniators to
save the country.
| wish Franklin had come along
with me and sat on my sycamore
Jog instead of gyratlng round
with Vincent Aston in British
waters. He'd have had some good
advice between bites-and caught
more fish too, according to re-
ports.
What would l have advised
him?
/. Don't let jim Farley jump
too quick.
2. Put the Brain Trusters to
planting Eaters.
3. Tell John Bankhead to put
! in bill to send all the colored
renters to Congo - then they
won't raise too much cotton.
4. Consolidate these scattered
government agencies into one
central. office in each county,
with the local banks sharing in
the business.
). Prohibit private European
loans in this country as well as
public. until they pay up.
6. Put excess labor to produc-
/ ing imperishable goods and store
them-such as crushed rock,
sand, limestone, all sorts of ores,
nitratea. phosphates, etc.
7. Make pilgrimage to
Monticello and read what Thorn
as jefferson said about bossing
everything from Washington.
8. Quit taxing North Carolina
three hundred million dollars a
wear and giving us back less than
fifteen million.
9. Give young iobless and land
less honeymooners 10 acres and
freedom and 20 years to pay for
it.
10. See that school-teachers
oct at least as much pay as coal
miners.
H.. Hang the LAWYERS and pol
iticians who are aiding and abat-
tine the gangsters and racketeers.
II. Pay denositors in closed
hanks and get the money from
those who got it.
Is. Make the U. s. army an
agency for suppressing crime.
II. Divorce liquor from profit,
and prohibit export of arms and
munitions to war-makers.
Chats as many as Woodrow's,
and enough, | guess.
The times-news. [volume] (Hendersonville, N.C.) 1927-current, 1934-04-14
THAT PRACTICAL OLD BOOK
BY WICKES WAMBOLDT

his heart is filled with divine love
and because his mind is under
divine guidance? Not so that
YOU could notice it.
The only reason a man is will
fully hateful to another is that
he is in the grip of some evil
force. If he were governed by
benign spirit, he would not
ristreat anybody.
Before We go any further with
this idea, we should remember
that men themselves are not evi.
but that when they do evil, it is
because they are under some
kind of evil influence. If you
can separate a man who is doing
evil from the influence that is
causing him to do evil. he will
immediately cease his evil con-
duct. The difference between a
good man and a bad man, is that
one is a vehicle for good and the
other is a vehicle for bad.
If man himself were bad, it
would be impossible to do any
thing for him. He could never
be reeeneratcd. You can never
make rotten apple sound. But
there are any number Of cases Of
men who were dcpravcd and be-
came worthy.
So when you pray for those
that despitcfully use you and
nersecutc you, what do YOU do?
You use the power of your
thought and personality to bring
the forces of good into their
lives. IF Won can accomplish
that you Immediately separate
them from evil, and they cease
to do evil-to you and to every
body else.
Thus you not only help them
to be free from unholy contacts
and to becorl1 wholesome, but
you help Yourself. You cause
Yourself to change your own at
titude toward such persons. You
drive the rancOr out Of your own
The times-news. [volume] (Hendersonville, N.C.) 1927-current, 1934-04-14
BY HUDNEY BUTCHER
NEA Service Staff Correspondent

WASHINGTON. - Don't never
" touch porcupine unless you
expect to get some feathers in
you'll"
That homely warning from Huey
Long to his fellow senators reeks
With as much truth as Senator Pat
Harrison's assurance that Huey is
he least respected man in the
Senate.
Detested as he is, Huey has
Iuills. From that angle, respect
for him is mounting. You can pour
Walls of scorn on him, but it's a
bad bargain if you get your skin
iull of thorns in return.
The least you can expect is that
Huey will get the galleries laugh
ing at you, whether or not his
oarbs make sense.
Senators in states contiguous
to Louisiana worry lest Huey
enter their territory and cam
paign against their reelection.
Many of their constituents are
the type of folks who elect
Hucy.
He invaded Arkansas to put over
Mrs. Hattie Caraway against the
wishes of Majority Leader Joe Rob-
inson, the other Arkansas senator.
Connally OF Texas has had night.
mares and .Huey is expected to be
in Mississippi this year campaign.
ing for a friend who seeks the Sat
of Senator Stephens.
But here's what happens in the
Senate when You touch 'the Dor,
cupine":
When Ham Lewis of Illinois 70.
Gently assailed him, Long switched
the topic to an unpaid substitution
TO his weekly paper and an unpaid
dlnner check so quickly that Ham
round himself demanding that the
chortliag galleries be quieted or
cleared. Nothing hurts Ham more
than gallery laughter at his !ey.
pense.
When Pat Harrison defend.
The times-news. [volume] (Hendersonville, N.C.) 1927-current, 1934-04-14
BEHIND THE SCENES IN
W/ASE|Il0T TON

ca Robinson against Longs ar.
tacks the other day he found
himself forced to explain a
$4,000 note bearing his name
which Long said was part OF
the bankrupt assets of closed
banks in Mississippi"
Cheap stuff, perhaps II but a,
amazing performance. Unpleasan
things happen to Huey, too. Bw
his hide is so tough that = ccult
be used for armor plate.
SPECTACLES Of the week: Con
~ gresham George Holden Tink
ham, lion-hunter and one of two
Republicans who upheld Roosa
velt's veto, standing in the Airing
ton hotel doorway dressed in DARK
cap, dark coat and vest with inches
of pink shirt showing above the
belt, khaki breeChes, leather put
tees and black shoes. Apparently
waiting for a horse or something
Senator "Cott on Ed Smith
sprawled in the Hamilton's lobby
handkerchief around his neck, fan
ming with a couple Of South Caro-
lima farmers. Big, specialized
cowboy-hatted John Jones, brother
and personal business agent OF
RIGS Jesse, fresh from Texas in
the Mayfower's lobby and letting
people know just who he was.
GROWERS of coins drop from
~ windows of government office
buildings when the hurdy-gurdy
man comes around. Completed
statistics on the White House
Easter egg-rolling show: Attend
ance, $4,000, largest ever: children
lost and returned, 81; children IL
from overeating, 25.
The new Russian embassy has
seven kitchens and kitchenettes
respectively, for big dinners, Am
bassador and Mrs. Troyanovsky
Counsellor and Mrs. Skvirsky, the
staff, the chancery, the SERVANTS
and general fourth floor utility.
Downright. 1884. NEA Service, Inc,
The times-news. [volume] (Hendersonville, N.C.) 1927-current, 1934-04-14
ACCLAIM SOVIET'S
ATRMEN, SAVING 1O7

MOSCOW, April 14.-UPI.-
The last six men of the Chelius-
kin, sunken Soviet Arctic expedi-
ton ice breaker, stranded on the
ice for So days, have been res
cued by airplane, it was an
nounced officially today.
The daring aviators who evacu-
ated all of the LOT men, women
and children have been nationally
acclaimed.
The times-news. [volume] (Hendersonville, N.C.) 1927-current, 1934-04-14
TALMAnCr IA =

ATT ANITA, Ga, i An nag ;V
Gov. Eugene Taln .'G,, j.
formally entered the r,, !t
electIon-without his S "
Of the action. N'1
His entrance foo of %.
paid to Miss Eleanor On 20 i.
nan, secretary Of The &c. s.. /.
ocratic executive com ,s..
two close personal fri ;,',',.
governor. They were ? " p
nord, city attorney q ", "
Earl Butler. solicitor n 70 !.
con city court.
The times-news. [volume] (Hendersonville, N.C.) 1927-current, 1934-04-14
WILL. HEAR BETTERS

RALEIGH, April 14.-(UP).
Paul Y. Betters, executive direc-
tor of the American Municipal
association, and president of the
United States conference of may
ors, will address representatives
of North Carolina cities at the
annual convention of the state
!nunicipal association here on
April 10 and 20.
heart, which not only relieves
you of a most uncomfortable
sensation, but which has the
spiritual and psychological effect
of softening and changing the
attitude toward you of those
enemies for whom YOU prav. ~.
There!is plenty Of sound prac-
.tical sense in that old. Book. 1t
is worthy of more study than it
gets. t.#... s.li 90 .'.'."!9 ".
The times-news. [volume] (Hendersonville, N.C.) 1927-current, 1934-04-14

Waking early
and being rest
less, l arose, got
into my bath
robe and slip
pers, and walked
thru the house
to a glass that
faced the east,
b e g. in n i n g to
redden in the
glow Of the ris-
ing sun. AS |
stood there, my
thoughts turned
The times-news. [volume] (Hendersonville, N.C.) 1927-current, 1934-04-14

l had an interesting experience
the other morning and 1 pass it
on to you for what it may be
worth.
The times-news. [volume] (Hendersonville, N.C.) 1927-current, 1934-04-14

Out of rs men and women drivers tested for
licenses in Salt Lake City, 10 failed and all were
men. Bachelors, probably, who hadn't been coached
from the back seat
The times-news. [volume] (Hendersonville, N.C.) 1927-current, 1934-04-14

Russians must be little smarter than other
people. Little kids of five and six can speak the
language.
The times-news. [volume] (Hendersonville, N.C.) 1927-current, 1934-04-14

Libertarian One who is Mortified by any injus
tice to the weak in some region far away.
The times-news. [volume] (Hendersonville, N.C.) 1927-current, 1934-04-14

A bigger and better cucumber has been devel-
oped for picking purposes. That's new dill I'M
der the New Deal
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1934-10-06

of Joint Secretary M0rSenthau
resolution passed by Congress in
June, which required submission
of information pertaining to the
disposition of substances used
in the manufacture of distilled
spirits.
The substances included such
materials as corn, cane and beet
sugar, blackstrap molasses,
yeast, and oak chips.
Thus far the regulations have
been exceptionally effective,
and Secretary Henry I. Nor
genthau, jr., and Internal Reve-
nue. Commissioner Guy T. Hell
vering make no secret of their
glee at it's satisfactory result.
One of the recent stills seized,
a plant of 1,500-gallon capacity,
had been using cane sugar. In
view of the fact that the cane
sugar is more expensive and less
satisfactory in making spirits,
the Treasury was convinced that
the illicit manufacturer had
been forced to use the sugar be-
cause of inability to secure the
cheaper grades.
Information secured By the
Bureau of Internal ReUenue re-
gdrding disposition of substances
used in 1Dhisky manufacture has
been the tip-oU to several illicit
stills, officials sag.
They expect the new law to
be one Of the most effective
weapons and admit that it will
probably be more successful
than any bottle regulations that
might be promulgated.
Henry Holt, the Grand Forks
IN. d. former printers devil"
who is opposing Republican
Senator Lynn j. Frazier in ap-
preaching election, is perplexed.
Born in Illinois in 1897, he
was taken to Norway when q
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1934-10-06

don't know what to bank on.
Martha and I have always
managed to see the sunny side
of things-even when we were
up against it worst. But this
general notwithstanding
attitude is sure getting us down.
So she suggested to me to write
to you and ask you how you feel
about things"
I feel sunk, plenty of the
time, Sid and Martha. I get
to wondering, just as you do,
what it's all about and if it's
all worth while. I'm even tempt
ed to begin Ordering about
The Good Old Days-though,
having lived through them, I
know darned we'll they weren't
within a million miles of being
as good" as the ancients would
have you believe. And these
moods became so pesty that I
finally decided to do something
about them.
I thought of all knew about
America, from history and from
81 years of watching her do her
stuff. I thought of the frontier
America where I was born, and
what that frontier had cost in
faith and sacrifice and red-hot
courage. I thought of this mod
ern America, which seems so
senseless, so heartless-and Of
the endless evidence which
comes to me, proving that it's
neither.
Last of all, thought about
myself and America. What had
America done for me? What
did America mean to me? How
did I really feel about America?
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1934-10-06
LISTEN, WORLD
By Elsie Robinson

That, I realized, was the most
important question of all. Once
it didn't matter much how one
felt about America-we could
take her for granted, as one
takes the solid earth for grant
ed. But now Americas going
through heavy weather. How.
she come out? And what will
happen to us If she doesn't?
So for hours I thought, Sid
and some of the things
thought weren't so hot! But
didn't duck them. I honestly
tried to see the whole picture.
And after I'd seen it as well as
I could, I sat down and wrote
what I'm about to give you.
It's a Confession of Faith
something to hold to when my
bewildered brain and aching
heart fail me. And since I've
made it part of my working
creed, I feel better about things.
I get just as mad, just as wor.
ried and wrung, but these words
steady me-help me march on.
And so I'm passing them
along
I BELIEVE IN AMERICA!
believe in that hope upon
which she was founded.
I believe that it was the finest
vision of government and broth
erly relation which men have
ever conceived.
And I believe that that vision
was an inevitable thing-that
it had to come in the course Of
human evolution-that it was
part of Gods plan as we'll as
mans plan.
I realize that we've bungled
that plan. I realize that the
men who have kept her going
weren't perfect. I admit that
much in American history was
weak, ill-advised and often
downright shameful:
YET BELIEVE IN AMER
1CA.
I believe that there's some
thing essentially sound and
right in the American plan am
the American spirit.
I believe that "someth,
will survive, through dark
and struggle. sickness and
spair, provided we back it
our faith, our pride and a
ton. Our wisdom may
faulty, our acts foolish
brutal-yet if in our hearts
believe in America and DE-
America, America will surviN
SO I BELIEVE IN AMERIC.
AND, GOD HELPING NE,
SHALL HOLD FAST TO THAI
FAITH THROUGH EVERY
DISCOURAGEMENT OR DIS
ASTER.
Copyright, 1884, by King Features
Syndicate, Inc.)
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1934-10-06
MARRY Go Round
BY Helen Rowland

I know a number of wives
who would be lots better, for
an occasional husbandly spank
ing. And a number of patient,
long,suffering husbands VIII o
would be better loved and more
respected if they had the cour-
age to spank their spoiled,
over-indulged wives. american
husbands are altogether too
meekO
A sock in the eye is different.
That's not treating a woman
like a baby-it's treating her
like an equal. And most modern
young women would be likely to
come back with an undercut
Cor is it uppercut?) which
would spoil the whole party.
Petruchio, the wife-tamer, is as
much out of the picture today
as Romeo the rhapsodical lover.
Neither has much chance with
a husky, intelligent golf-playing
gal.
It is true that down some
where at the bottom of every
natural-minded woman's heart
there is a longing to be con"
quered and tanned by a great,
big, strong he-man. But this
longing is only theoretical
and if a man is going in for
wife-taming, he had better do
it like a gentleman or he may
soon find himself paying ali
mony.
Still, if I were a man and
married to that sort" of Wom-
an, I think I'd spank my wife,
every now and then, just to
prove to her that I loved her,
and that I was Boss. I'd give
her a few ''love-taps' just to
drive the argument home.
I'd spank her every time she
made me look foolish by ogling
another man. Every time she
served me a cold delicatessen
dinner when I come home tired
and hungry from the office.
And every time she used the
house-money to pay for beauty
treatments and new hats.
Copyright 1884. by King Features
Syndicate. 1nc.)
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1934-10-06
T human Side of the News - By Edwin G. + I'LL

and Means Committee, and as
such had his finger in many a
tariff pie. Tariffs and the coun-
try's finances and sticking pins
in Uncle Andy Mellon have been
Carriers specialties. He can
even make figures interesting
for, unlike Republican David
Reed of the Senate, Garner can
get all hot and excited about
figures, and has a way of dram
atizing them and making them
march. Reed is about as excita-
BILE as the index of the Encyclo-
pedia Britannica, but Garner
grows perfectly passionate over
a flock of statistics.
The warm friendship that eX-
listed between Longworth, the
aristocrat, and Jack Garner, the
man of the soil, the plain Jack
sonian Democrat, was one of the
marvels and admirations of the
House and of all Washington.
No two men were more out
wardly unlike. Garner, born of
the common people, is rough
and ready. Longworth, born
with a silver spoon in his
mouth, was suave and polished.
While Nick Longworth was or"
namenting Harvard, Jack Gar
ner was punching longhorn
steers in Texas.
Longworth rarely entered a
debate. Garner explodes like a
cannon cracker and booms like
a bass drum. Longworth never
permitted himself to become ex-
cited or to raise his voice above
the cultured level. Longworth
was fond of society. Garner
hates social life and rarely &C.
cepts an invitation.
Year after year his Texas
constituents kept him there.
Congress after Congress, clear
back to Theodore Roosevelt's
early days in the Presidency,
through Roosevelt's, Taft's,
Wilson's, Harding's, Coolidge's
and Hoover'S, and now another
Roosevelt'S administrations.
Garner has a fine farm near
his town of Uvalde. Years ago
he used to raise goats, Angoras,
for their fine wool. When they
were making up tariff bills in
the House and the fight came
up over the tariff on wool,
they used to say there were
only three million Angora goats
in the United States and that
Jack Garner owned 10000
of them. He doesn't own any
now. Farming, cattle, banking
and shrewd business sense have
made him a rich man, though
he lives very simply.
Down through the Rio Grande
they call him Ito Juan-Uncle
John. The title fits him pretty
well. He's a kindly man,
though apt to be brusque and
quick tempered; a loyal man,
though given to wrathy out
breaks in which words are not
always carefully chosen.
Copyright. 1884. by King Features
Syndicate. 1nc.)
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1934-10-06

Washington as a member of the
Fifty-eighth Congress. He was
only 80 then, and a good deal
closer 20 Jim Wells description.
than he is now. Only the
other day the Speaker turned
his sixty-fifth birthday and had
to be reminded of it by the
general manager of the Garner
family, Mrs. Elite Garner, his
wife, who has been his secretary
throughout his career in Con-
gress. She's a story in herself,
that woman.
For many years he was a
member of the important Ways
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1934-10-06

for the legislature by Jim
Wells, the political boss of the
Brownsville county up the lovely
Rio Grande valley. Wells had
never seen the young fellow I'M
til one day he went up to Austin
and somebody introduced Jack
Garner.
"You the young fellow we
nominated a while back?" asked
Jim Wells. Jack Garner
reckoned it was so. "Dogged if
you amt a hard looker!" said
Wells, shaking his head and
passing on. He has been Jack
Garner ever since he came to
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1934-10-06
Care to Die?
Here's Your Chance

I1eTe s TOUR Cnance
Before 1884 has ended about $4,000 persons will have
been killed in the United States in automobile accidents
as compared with $1,000 in 1888
The increase the National Safety Council believes re-
suits from:
Relaxed law enforcement.
Use of old vehicles unsafe by wear or neglect.
Greater speed of new cars.
Increased use of liquor by motorists
Every automobile driver should keep these four facts
in mind if he cares to live.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1934-10-06

Revenue to
examine the
b o o k S of
m a n ufactur-
ers of ma
terials used
i'm liquor pro-
ductiOn.
On Septem-
b err IA t h e
Treasury De-
partment an
nounced that
the Commits
Sioner of In
ternal Reve-
nue. had pre-.
scribed er.
t a in regula'
tions to carry
out provisions
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1934-10-06

They have a way Of calling
Vice Presidents of the United
States forgotten men," and
making wisecracks about their
general uselessness. You can
get a bet any day that not
one person in so can recite, off"
hand, a consecutive list Of Vice
Presidents who have held office
in the past five presidential
administrations.
course, there is some truth
in all the testing, though it's
the fault of the Constitution,
or of political conventions,
rather than the individuals who
are tagged to play second fid'
die in the big chorus. But now
and again an unusual person
atty does arise, one who gains
in stature and the public re.
spect as he continues in Of
flee, as Tom Marshall, of In
diana did, for example.
And another such a one is
Jack Garner, of Texas. Dig
nifty, good sense, an avoidance
Of the limelight and strict at
tention to business have marked
his conduct since he took Of"
flee a year and eight months
ago. Always interesting, Mr..
Garner, of the Lone Star State.
He is short and stocky. COM
fortably plump, yet not soft.
His sufficient hair is gone all
silver in the last few years,
but has not brought me shadow
of advancing age to 2 face as
roseate as the setting of the
sun over the Rio Grande.
Within that rosy countenance
twinkle and CLEAN a pair Of eyes
as blue and keen as you will
come across in many a. days
travel; as keen as needle points
and as blue as the sky over the
Lone Star State. Those blue
eyes can glow with fun or freeze
in cold fury. They can twinkle
with glee or stab with savage
wrath. They are, perhaps, the
most notable feature in the
Texans entire physiognomy.
The nose is long, well-shaped
and set above a firm, rather
tight mouth, whose lips droop
slightly at the corners.
You see a gentleman who
makes no pretentions to being
a dandy, but who has learned
through the years (and partly
through close companionship
with the departed Nick Long.
worth, the best-dressed man in
the House, in his day. to like
well-cut clothes, clothes that
bear the mark Of a master
tailor.
Gray is his color, harmonic.
ing with eyes, hair and the
whole cast of him. And with
gray suits he likes four-in-hand
neckties that make no bones of
being loud and lively. Almost
any color in ties suits Jack Gar.
ner, so long as it's red.
Forty years or so ago Garner
"a very young and rustic Gar
ner in those dayS-was put up
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1934-10-06

t h ir W a y
t h r o u g h a
score or more
o f p r e S 8
a G e n t S to
h e ar what
A G riculturist
Wallace has
to say.
For months
Wallace con.
ferences we're
crowded. Re-
porters, how
ever, were in
t he b a c k =
ground.
Front seats
were taken by
p u b | lei t Y
a G e n is of
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1934-10-06
The Greatest Shoe
On Earth
By John Snure, Jr.

boy and there became skilled
in the sports of the land Of
the fiords.
When he returned to the
United States, in 1906, he made
his home in the Middle West
and in the winters continued his
athletic activities learned in
Norway when he could find time
to slip away from the printing
presses where he was employed.
He has neUer forgotten those
first days in Norway.
Particularly fond of all sports,
he is especially enthusiastic over
skiing.
So, it may be that Wash
ingtOn will observe sOlOn
skiing over the Capitol grounds
and down Pennsylvania Avenue
next January.
Gen. Hugh S. Johnson has re.
tired as administrator of the
MIRA.
But his good work fingers on.
The NRA has released a very
important document having to
do with a major industry and
signed by Johnson.
It was one of his last official
acts.
The imposing document is en-.
titled:
Amendment to Code of Fair
Competition for the Powder
Puff Industry"
Things are improving at the
press conferences of Secretary
of Agriculture Henry A. Wallace.
Newspaper men are finally
finding it possible to thread