Evening star., 1934-07-15

and how she tied knot in tom cats tail b
stop my nosebleed.
We'll this feller wrote up everything I told
him and called it superstition. Said wasn't
nothn' but old witch doctor. Superstitioni"
Granpappy Jitters thumped his stick on the
hearth indignantly. why. my boy willie-the
one that amt feeble -minded-he went TO the
city to sing over the raddio with the Presto
Depilatory Hill Billies and he says the people
there is jest superstitious mountain
folks.
"Accordin' to Willie, these city smart alecks
believe that workin' every day from to S is
a sure way o. preventin' starvation. They put
up red and green lights on pole at the cross
roads. thinkin' it will keep em from gettin'
their necks broke. They hgger it's bad luck TO
cross a street katty-corner or leave an autymo-
beel standin' alongside fire hydrant They
believe that a sprig of parsley makes a tough
steak tender, and slice of lemon makes stale
fish fresh. Why dag-gone it!-some of em even
think they can bring back prosperity by putin
up a picture of a bird in the winder. And they
call us superstitious! Heh-heh!'
Granpappy Jitters was the first authentic
hermit / had ever seen. AS I went farther
into the mountains, however, I encountered
many more. There were, among others Uncle
Ash Puckerheld of Trailing Gallus, old man
Wildership of Malariaville and zachariah Rim
ple who lived near Upsadaisy, Tenn. The woods
were full of them. Some of them, according
to local legend, had been disappointed in love,
some had succumbed to various forms of tn
growing religion and some were merely dyspep-
tic. But all of them we're aged, bearded and
taciturn-just what hermitS should be.
THAT, however, was last year. Things are
different now When went through whifae-
fra Tenn 7 fnaInd Azn
Puckerfield old man wldership and Zachariah
Rimple walking up and down in front of Gran
pappy Jitters cabin They carried large plac-
ards reading "Amalgamated Recluses' Local No.
l." "Jitters Is Unfair" 1--WE Want Longer
Whiskers and Shorter Hours"
Don't go in thar, stranger!" warned old man
Widership. Were a-picketin' the place"
Whats the trouble?" asked.
"Strike," explained zachariah Rimple
"The Summer resort folks wasn't giVin' us
square deal so We walked out on 'em Gram
pappy, bein in favor of the open hut. wouldn't
jine up. But reckon he CANT hold out much
longer. He's gettin powerful lonesome in thar,
all by hissef."
Il hear tell they're importin' strikebreakers
from Memphis" old widership piped up.
Department store Sanity Clauses with false
whiskers. But that won't get 'em nowhere"
At that moment Granpappy Jitters hobbled
out of his cabin, waving a once white handker-
chief on the end of his walking-stick ~In
jine up, boys he quavered. Il just gotta have
somebody to talk to!"
"Hooray!" shouted the pickets, hourishing
their placards. "Comrade Jitters, welcome TO
the ranks of Amalgamated Recluses. Down
with capitalism and crepe whiskers!''
And the last saw of the four old men they
were marching up the mountain trail singing
the "International-to the tune of Frankie
and Johnnie" Thus class-consciousness has
penetrated to the very heart of America. The
hermits are presenting a united front in the
oackWoods Perhaps DR.. Writ was right
after all