Smyrna times., 1933-04-12
ABOUT TOWN
Jay Dee

"a lot of US thought that now the
/ iig-saw craze was over and we
could at least talk to our girl
friends again without being told to
look for somebody's pasteboard leg.
Trifing conversation wasn't well
come. Neither were such trif1ing
trifies as affectionate endeavors. 1t
was tough. Puzzles are past and
instead of blue skies we have storm
clouds in the form of knitting. AS
we reflect upon the past we can
see where the former evil had the
7 advantage over the latter because
we could at least catch up on our
sleep, if necessary. Now with the
advent of clashing needles we eth
er have to count three hundred and
fifty stitches one by one, or drape
idiotic punches of wool over lamp
shades and wind them up. They
call them skeins. You knoW-the
old skein game. If a man has any
vanity, his yarn-bustin' girl friends
will knock it out of him by making
him assume a hands-up attitude
and then coyly drap a bunch of
wool over them and start winding
Makes you feel terribly silly. Then
we invariably get burned at least
once trying to find a dropped
stitch. All of this may sound pret-
ty rough, but when they begin to
take the knitting seriously you
might as well decide to go into
Information for six weeks. 1t is as
bad as that, and worse. They get
that determined look which makes
every sensible male realize any in
reference would be plain and
fancy suicide. They won't talk,
can't smoke, and refuse to give
even the slightest Indication that
your presence is appreciated. It's
a heck of life. Knit one, purl
two -Phooey! We're all getting
to be knit-wits.
Which reminds -Rube's back
in town. That boy gets the tough
est breaks Of anyone know. He
told me he had been in town two
days and hadn't been able to scare
up anything better than a coke.
He even looked pale. Whoever ac-
cused Rube of having dry humor
is all wet The humor is o. k, but
it drips. How about a stein of
rich, golden lager, keed? Boy
oboyl
Glen and Bunny went fishing on
Sunday with all intentions of MAX
ing it a fatal day for all unwary
denizens Of the deep. They fished
all day, and at night decided that
all the fish were out Of town. They
couldn't even buy one to bring
home. The day wasn't entirely
lost, however, because Bunny al
most caught little turtle. Pos
, sibly this proves that turtles are
not as smart as they might be. Or
that fish are smarter than they are
!, supposed to be.
| One young man about town felt
; very, very foolish the other even
, ing. It seems that in a moment of
! light-hearted folly he dated some
/; buxom lassie for a fiivver ride. He
7 left word that if his regular inquir-
: ed his whereabouts he was in New
: York. That town takes an awful
: lot of blame for lot of things as
: It is; he could have made that Will
: mington. Ennyhoo, he parked on
! that road in back of the pond and
, proceeded to admire the moon and
: other objects of interest, if any
From all accounts things looked
I, pretty good. His faithful girl
: friend, bemoaning the fact that he
was out of town, accepted an invi-
tation by Bill and OTIS to take a
ride to pass the time Fate step
e ped in and led the trio to the same
!, road where her erring laddie was
plling up more errors. AS they
] rode by the parked car the girl
e thought that the car looked
= strangely familiar. Just to con-
: vince herself that there was no foul
1 labor at intersections she told the
e boys to ride by again. BY this
I time the parking pasher shifted a
! rodent also. Boys and girls, wher
I ne saw that his sweetie recognized
7 his profile he roared that puddle
: jumper over the ruts in a manner
that would put old Barney Oldfielc
to shame. He hit the main stem
in less time than it takes to type it
$ No use, she caught him red handed
and red faced. Poor lad has led 9
d dogs life ever since Moral: A
bird in the hand gathers no moss
j. Maunk.s~ IL l.