Montgomery County sentinel. [volume] (Rockville, Md.) 1855-1974, 1933-08-03
FABLE OF THE
FOUR MERGE
NARY MINXES
g
By GEORGE ABE
Q. bell syndlcate,-wNU Service.

~ NEE In the dim Days, gone
beyond Recall, when Parents
~ were not compelled to take out
Licenses, there lived in an e.
Fiat Town on the o. and A. H. q
Quartette of Nectarines who had their
PICK Of all the Valentines between
Padgett's Siding and Sumac Ridge.
TO look at the old Photographs of
them, one might suspect that they
were related to Sis Hopkins, but it
must be remembered that In the dead
ly Nineties, when every Dorothy was
banged across the Brow and had a
New England Boiled Dinner sewed on
to her wide Hat, the most ravishing
Specimen of the only attractive Sex
looked as If she had been dipped in
something and then dried in the Sun.
Now these fair vestals were Named
Lib and Min and Stel and Jess, and
1t Is of Interest to note that away
back. nearly 35 Years ago, before the
World had been reformed into it's pres
ent deplorable Fix, these Maidens
slept with one Eye open, kept Tab on
the Opposite Gender and, in a General
Way, looked out for Number one and
the Blue Ticket.
A good many Weepers will tell you
that previous to 1910, when a Nice
Girl was supposed to Faint If anyone
saw her Ankles, every Marriage had
a Background Of True Love and every
Deb went looking for Nobility of
Character instead of an AAl Rating
at the Commercial Agency. If the
Truth must come out, full many a
cold Calculation was made beneath a
Poke Bonnet.
Weren't Too Ambitious.
Cleopatra knew how to put Crimp
in a Check Book. When Solomon be-
gan giving Presents to the Queen of
Sheba she never begged him to stop
because she was afraid he could not
afford it. Going a little further back,
the fuzzy Gentleman who wore Loop
ard Skin bias, and naught else, always
had the Inside Track if his Cave was
stocked with fresh Pterodactyl Meat.
And, checking up on those Relatives,
can we not be certain that the gimpy
and enterprlsing Ape who climbed the
highest Palms and brought down the
milkiest Nuts was the White-Haired
Papa Of the Jungle?
When the four Dulcineas out at
Musselwhite began to look around for
Feathers that could be used in a Nest,
they were simply running true to form.
OF course it was a zap Era and q
Dollar would go a long Distance.
whereas now it seems muscle-bound.
The Village Belle who was getting
ready to take Buggy Ride could
hardly sleep Wink the Night before
and at a Musical Offering the Folks
In the Back Rows would stand up to
get a Peek at the new Triumph of
Mans Ingenuity called the Saxophone.
The four conniving Cuties were not
looking for Millionaires. IT. was no
use trying to creep up on Something
that wasn't there. Each of them
merely wanted a Home with a Front
Yard to it and a Hired Girl and the
kind Of buds that would go with q
Silk Parasol.
They were real Chums and used to
visit One Another and lie awake far
into the Night discussing their foxy
Plans for landing and stringing some
Live Ones.
It will ever be Question in picking
out the Envelope supposed to contain
the Pay Check, whether it is wiser to
spread the Bait for John who already
has Currency in the Nit or troll for
hard Worker who owns a set Of
Tools.
Lib was the first to take the High
Jump. After burning up many ton
of Anthracite Coal to keep the Front
Room warm through the Long Winter
Evenings, and holding Hands until her
Fingers were Blue, she finally picked
out a large slow-moving Pachydehm-
with the very attractive Name Of
Yves. She pinned the Ribbon on him
because he had just come into 100
acres of good Land. Other Improve
ments on the Same included House
with Scroll-Work around the Eaves
and $500 worth Of Lightning Rods on
the Barn.
Ike No Piker.
Anyone who expects to live on the
Income from a Quarter Section should
be ready for a Diet Of Rainwater and
Crackers. The net on that much
Land, after paying Taxes and max
ing improvements and Repairs. would
not keep the average Family In Blu
ing. Furthermore, any time Congress
gets too busy trying to do something
for the Farmer by mere use Of the
Vocal Cords, any good Fertile Tract
10 apt to be Liability instead Of an
Asset.
Yves thought he was rich but he
was sitting on the Front Stoop Of The
Poor House. One cannot obtain ac-
tual Money from a Farm except by
plastering q Mortgage. and any Gen
tleman who lives in Town and wears
q White Shirt with a Granite Button
and devotes the lifelong day to Check
ers and Criticism Of the Government.
=