The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1933-12-12

49, 6 veil as those who are
~ sick.
g we're in need of a surgica.
g. n you wouldn't be irked by
- suggestion that you consult g
Sl~gcCn, nor would you insist thai
y0u knew more about your insides
ch2a he did.
PERSONS who are maladjustec
emOtionally are just as much in the
dark about their trouble as persons
who are in physical pain. Since the
unconscious portion Of the mind ex-
oeedS the conscious, the psychologist
like the surgeon, is handicapped
by the necessity of doing his work
in an unseen laboratory. Long
training supplemented by experience
make him more able to spot the
trouble and deal with it successfully
than the helpless patient.
can not quarrel with your idea
that sexual incompatibility causes
a large percentage of the divorces.
I agree that the causes for such in
compatibility are extremely varied
and that there is no royal road out.
The authority who attempts to
force his own solution" on an I'M
prepared mind is bungler. Knowl-
edge divorced from the art of i'm
parting it is capable of as much
harm as good.
No expert ever gives direct advice.
His part is to add to the evidence
at the patients disposal. If during
the treatment, the individual 1x-
perienceS a change in standards
and outlook which makes it possible
for him to solve his problem in a
manner previously impossible to
him, it hardly can-.be said that the
solution was thrust on him. It is as
if he had had certain psychic
binders removed.
1t is possible that persons who
give advice for a living are attempt
ing to SOcialize a messianic COM
pick The 'fixit'' urge is capable of
great mischief when the f1xer wants
everything run according to his
personal idicsyncracies. The value
Of advice is dependent upon the
clarity Of the advisors insight and
his ability to free his opinions from
his own unreSolved conflicts. In
every case the questioner should be
left to make his own decision.
Dear Jane Jordan - am a
young man 26 with an outlandish
desire to get married to some nice
girl who would appreciate
home-loving boy. The girl 1 have
in mind is everything a fellow
could expect except for the fact
that she has an incurable desire
to dance, and dancing to her
means bottle of spirits. On three
occasions she has imbibed too
freely and made rather a bad i'm
preston on my friends. Do you
believe that if she cared for me
that she would give up the drink
ing part of her nature? 1 wouldn't
want her to take a pledge because
the first Spat we'd have she prob
ably would get picked. I rather
she would quit for her own coed,
of her own free will, than to sign
all the pledges in the world.
j. K.
Answer-It seems to me that you
two would be starting out with the
very situation which breaks up SO
many marriages later on. I would
not advise any man to marry a girl
whom he wishes to change. 1t ar
CUES that he has not adjusted to
the girl as she is, but as he hopes
she will become. When the success
Of marriage depends on a perso-
nality change on the part of one OF
the partners, it adds one more haz-
ard to an already difficult task.
I haven't the slightest idea
whether or not the young lady will
find a substitute in marriage for
the drinking side of her nature. "
1t would be more surprising if she
changed than if she did not.