The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1933-09-07

here is one that shows what The Re-
publican can do:
Thursday 1 lost a gold watch 1
valued highly. l Immediately adver-
tised in your lost and found column.
Yesterday l went home and found the
watch. in the pocket of another suit.
1t certainly pays to advertise"
Count me in on the list of rattle
brains. l went on a picnic Tuesday
evening and forgot the bread for
the sandwiches.
/ wouldn't want to accuse anybody
Intentionally, but it's my opinion that
the ballot on repeating the 18th
amendment was made indefinite to the
mass of people for purpose.
When you vote the beer ballot, you
vote either for or against beer, and
if you vote against beer, it means
against.
But take the repeal ballot. If you
vote for the ratification of the amend
ment, which repeats the eighteenth
amendment, you are voting to bring
back liquor. If you vote against rat
ifcation, you are voting for continu-
ing prohibition.
Just be on the safe side, vote the
middle list of names, and you vote to
keep prohibition in force.
4 4
States Attorney Dawson and Con-
stable Shartzer had a little upset on
Tuesday night near Sines. 1t seems
the Ford car couldn't negotiate the
steep hill. Constable Shartzer, being
used to wrecks, took the matter light
". But Attorney Dawson, being a
new experience with him, was just a
bit excited for a short time. The car
was not damaged.
*
In another column in a West Vir-
ginia paper among things the writer
doesn't like is the fellow who comes
along and asks: GLOW are the whiskey
and women in this town."
Kindly kick him one in the pants
for me, too. If there's anything that
gripes-
There are ALWAYS two sides to every
question. So also are there two
chances for everything and every
body. Even in worry, there are two
chances. Either you worry or yor
don't.
So this week, you have just two
chances. Either you like this col
umn or you do not. If you do, al
right. If you don't, you have just two
chances. Either quit reading it o.
write one yourself. If you quit read
ing it, your worries are over; If vol
write one yourself you still have two
chances. You'll either get run out Of
town or you won't. If you don't, it.:
all right. If you get run out you still
have two chances. You can eithe
stay in the county or leave it. If vol
leave the county, all right; if yol
don't you still have two chances. You
either join the NRA or you don't. l:
you do your worries are just begin
ming. If you don't your worries arr
doubled, but you still have twC
chances.
You either get boycotted or yol
don't. If you don't your worries arr
over. If you do, you still have TIVE
chances. You either beg or you don't
if you beg, your worries are over. 1
you don't you still have two chances
Either the relief feeds you or tn
government pays you for not raising
anything, and you still have tw
chances.
It's like the two Negroes who wer
discussing whether or not they woul'
have to go to war.
Don't worry" one of them sug
gested. Gust two things can happen
You is either drafted or you ain
drafted. If you amt you can forge
it; if you is then you've got tw
chances. You may be sent to Franc
or you may be kept at home. If yo1
stays here you don't have to worry
if you is sent to France then you'v
got two chances. They may send yoI
to the front or keep you in Paris.
you stay in Paris, your troubles ar
over; if you go to the front then yo1
have two chances: you may be sho
and you may not be. If you're not
then you don't need to worry; if yo
are shot you've got two chances. Yo
may die and you may get well. If yor
get we'll you don't need to WORM
and if you die-well, you've still go
two chances"
But to get back to this column
You either like it or you don't. l
you do, you can continue next weel