Evening star., 1933-02-20
INSTALLMENT xxxv.

- would understand my not 60
ing honc?" Carroll ques-
i toned. She mopped her eyes
then with an unlaundered
handkerchief to add, My handker-
chiefs new and terribly stiff"
And Michael producing big, soft
one, said, Here, darlingl" Then he
obviously forgot that which she had
asked him and she had to remind him
of it.
"I spoke about my not going home,
Mike, and mothers understanding.
Her tears and her clinging so tightly
to his hand had made him forget her
need and the fact shamed him.
"Oh. yes" he said, I'm sorry, dear:
Carroll. did she ever fail to understand
YOU, even here, where we all see true
shapes so mistily and barge around in
the dark and bang our shins and knock
pieces from our hearts?"
mo" Carroll whispered; she sobbed
"No, she-she always did understand"
But you see-it was Sundays and Sun
days-I didn't go home and she want
ed nd-and-Theresa said so!'
Her voice rose dangerously at the end
and she was crying hard.
"Oh, Godi" thought Michael, which
God, because kind, understood. Then
michael slipped an arm around her
a
Jwith her always, don't you know that?
sIf you really love person that persons
always with you-why Carroll, when
&you-I mean, dear-she had you close
Railways because-she loved you. Do you
know what I mean?"
She caught her breath and nodded.
At moments, she had felt that her
Imother and Theresa were closer to her
tthan ever they'd been while alive. And
because, having lost them she knew
how she loved them.
Tiff she understood. and-under-
stands" she whispered brokenly.
Look here" said Michael almost
Violently, sswhat. would heaven be worth
If it didnk take you to something better
than va have here? Heaven, or what
lever yon want to call it. would be worth
fiust nothing and life would be a vile
land ghastly little jest We've got to
Ego on to do lot of understanding that
will make us do all the forgiving we
fdidn't do while we were clumplng
saround here. And your mother forgave
fyou any sins here; you ADMIT she
always understood"
Yes! Oh, Mike, you always help
,trle so and you always have" she whis-
spered, raising wet eyes to his. He drew
,away; he had to. Carroll, too, drew
!away, stiffened, cold, and with much OF
even that greatly needed comfort gone.
She made laggard way UP the stairs
Very shortly after that. She was tired,
she found
Miss CasSandra's door was open, and
because Carroll didn't want to see Miss
Cassandra or any one, she tried to tiptoe
past. but Miss Cassandra called her
with, Carroll, dear child, I want little
word with you, please" And, of course,
she had to go in
"Sit down by my bed. please" Miss
Cassandra ordered, and Carroll settled
to hear the little word that was to
change her entire life and to give her
full life.
Dear" said Miss Cassandra, "do you
love Michael? And I don't quite mer0
as a dear friend, nor as a gentleman
guardian after long years Of self
assumed guardianship. / mean-bHt It
Is difficult, I find, for me to explain,
but perhaps, child, you know what
mean?"
Carroll had lost all color; now it came
back with interest, and she spoke the
truth because she. had never lied when
1t really mattered.
II do love him." she said, voice
trlle brittle from hurt, land so much
that could never explain how much
the chance But Miss Cassandra he
doesn't feel that way, know, because,
you see"
NO" said Miss Cassendra severely,
ST do not see; in fact, my dear child,
I know that his devotion to you is
entire"
Then she looked at Carroll and away.
CAROLS eyes seemed to belong to
soul who has known long arctic night,
and who, at last, sees the almost for
gotten sun, to blink at it, to doubt it,
but to hope.
Miss CasSandra went on, an extra in
fusion of crispness in always crisply
delivered words. "a lady. Wister, did
not show feeling) What I wished to
say" she began once again, sis that all
gentlemen need help from ladies when
it comes to this delicate point. They
falter badly, poor dears, and they need,
the most glib of them, l fancy, little
prompting. And Michael has never
been given to asserting his own needs"
I'D love to help him in that way
said Carroll, "or," she added quickly,
but with less enthusiasm, lin any way.
Miss CaSsandra; but a good many
women help men in that way when they
really don't want to be helped; and
don't want to be in that position, and
III can't believe-that you're right, be-
cause, YOU see-juSt this evening"
For the first time since nursery years.
Miss Cassandra interrupted.
do you think would mislead you?"
she questioned, a little coldly.
"Oh, mol" Carroll answered fervently.