Evening star., 1933-08-06

yacht clubs were not entirely inconsistent I
joined the yacht club at the solicitation OF
several members who assured me that while
owning a yacht was not an absolute bar to
membership more chubby spirit could be
shown by not owning one, as to accord with
the yachtless condition of practica..y 100 per
cent of the clubs membership. This particu-
lar yacht club known as the Cercle Nau-
tique de Cannes, and ask any Frenchman II
cercle nautique doesn't mean yacht club? just
to prove 1t, members even wore yachting caps
with the emblem of the club stitched onto the
front of the cap, above the peak, but the only
time they were really at sea was after three
brandy cocktails made by Claude the Barman.
Now that prohibition is SO nearly at an end,
I might hint that the ingredients OF brandy
cocktail at this yacht club were brandy, shaved
ice and a cocktail mixer. Shake well and pour
via a cocktail glass into yacht club member
and, with the third cocktail, anybody could
see that as far as the weaker-headed members
we're concerned, ''the ship had sailed" MEM
ber could also get thoroughly tanned that way,
beginning first with the liver, and at times,
too, some members could acquire rolling gait,
but I maintain that all these evidences OF
yachting are not incompatible with golfing as
played in Cannes. As for athletics. I call upon
Buck Warshawsky, former lightweight cham
pion of the Latin Quarter, to witness that in
Paris man who rides bicycle and gets run
down by q taxicab is referred to by the papers
as prominent athlete.
This brings me to the reason why resigned
from q large athletic club-the reason why
resigned from the yacht club being purely q
personal one and concerning only myself and
my wife, who was getting laryngitis from talk
ing about the other members as well as about
me- The athletic club, however, was an
American institution and possessed all the fea-
lures Of any really grade-A athletic club. in
cluding an entrance fee of $3.50 and annual
does of over s100. After joining this club and
being a member for almost a year found
that had never visited the club except once,
when I bought an imported perfecto, and by
a casual experiment in cost bookkeeping,
estimated that the cigar stood me In $35035.
I beat out the second annual dues, by one week.
with as politely worded letter Of resignation
as was possible in the circumstances.
The two golf clubs lost me as the result
of two widely different golf club characteristics
One of the clubs had a steward who formerly
ran a large restaurant in New York, to which
he had come from an excellent restaurant in
Paris and because Of the knife and fork exer-
else that I took I gained Is pounds in about
Is days My game suffered also, and there
fore resigned from that golf club and Joined
the other golf club whose members seemed to
be in the pink Of condition. They were appar-
emily trained down to this pink Of condition
by exercise but several Of the members con-
fded to me that worrying over the cost Of
membership, including couple Of assessments,
had caused them to lose weight and as I
never viewed my golf seriously anyway, de-
cided to take turkish baths instead Of assess
ments.
You have no doubt heard Of the man who
went downtown to business so late and left
for home so early that he passed himself en-
route. Well, two years ago last Spring was
elected to membership in an honest-to-gracious
French club at O'Clock one evening and re-
signed my membership at O'Clock the next
morning. This cluk, which we will call the