The Washington times., 1933-04-03
3

- TO geC I n e
sOmerviile operator.
Finally. a very tired voice
answered the phone:
Are you calling?" the
operator asked.
mo" the guest said, gasp
ing, I'm tolling. thought
you were dead"
n n r
Senator McAdOO, leaving the
White House, got in one OF
those 2O-cent taxis for a trip to
his home at the Shoreham.
Poetic fancy moving him, or
perhaps just an urge to see the
scenery, he ordered the driver
to 60 through Rock Creek Park
instead of out on Connecticut
Avenue. At the end OF the
journey, the Senator offered
the regular 20-cent fare, but
the driver-insistent upon his
rights-demanded, and got.
40 cents for the extra mile
age, though he had not been
out of the first zone. HIS
explanation was:
"The longest way round is
the most expensive way home"
y y Y
President ROOSevelt'S favor
tie song is Home on the
Range" a cowboy ballad that
Bascomb TimmonS remembers
when he was a cowboy down
on the quarter Circle T ranch,
in Texas.
Strange part about it all Is
that this is the song the cow
boys FUSED to sing: when they
wanted to Groom the cattle to
sleep. In other words, a cradle
song for cattle.
Fasteners, of course, never
heard of such a thing as sing
ing the cattle to sleep-but it's
old stuff to the cowboys. Re
calling this, and the scarcity
of good singing cowboys, Dave
Guion, who popularized the
song, told of an occasion when
the cattle were suffering from
insomnia. They hadn't slept
for a week. A telegram was
sent to John Charles Thomas
asking him to sing "Home on
the Range" over the radio. He
did, it was broadcast to the
cattle-and they ali went to
-leep.
The sequel to, this is: The
cattle slept so, soundly they
had to be awakened next
morning by bugle-s, broadcast
ing from Fort Sam Houston.
MH W
Labor leaders almost a hun.
dred strong-ahd all of the he
man type-cluttered up the cor
ridors of the. Department Of
Labor Building, each asking as
he arrived, breathlessly, Where
is Madame Secretary" To one
man, an attendant replied:
''Madame's secretary? Shes
up in 'Madame's rooms"
Madame Secretary. of course,
IS no other than Secretary of
Labor Frances Perkins, the first
of her sex to hold the office.
y y y
Out in Chevy Chase a family
who thinks the world and all
of an old colored retainer had
fixed for her an apartment
atop the house. The other day
the Lady of the oHouse went
on an inspection tour and
apologized for not having pur-
chased a new mattress for the
aged darky. The mistress said:
"Why didn't you let me know,
Janey, that your mattress was
so Old-and all full Of knots.
I'll order a new one today"
'T don't mind them knots"
"YOu dOn't?"
"NO ma'am. Them's my saw
ings. Money"
y y y
Women accompanying their
husbands to one of the numer-
Gus conventions in Washington
were invited to the White House
for tea. One of the men hap
pened to be an autograph
hunter. He pleaded with a lady
friend to bring back the sigma
ture of Mrs. Roosevelt. To
\ make sure of getting the sig
nature he loaned a fountain
pen. When the girl friend had
gone to all the trouble of cor
nering Mrs. Roosevelt, and ask
Ing for the signature, it was
Found that the pen was dry. So
one of the attendants was dis
patched to fill the pen, and Mrs.
Roosevelt obliged with a sig
nature. In her glee, the sigma
ture hunter shouted on the steps
outside the Executive Mansion:
GIVE not only got her sigma
ture, but I've got a fountain pen
filled with White House ink"
n Hooray!
y y
AN IMAGE
The Capitol is the head,