The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1933-04-03

! nome IN Jne evening ne usually is
tired and just sits around
A married woman rides home
from work with him every evening.
They work at the same place and
she lives across the street from
us. have a jealous nature and l
don't like this.
We've quarreled often about it,
and my husband gets terribly
angry. Am I too selfish or jeal-
Gus? I want to be happy. Please
tell me what to do?
LONELY LUE.
Answer-Happiness most often is
found in the glow which follows
successful striving You haven't
had any successes to enjoy recently
On the contrary, you feel that you
are slipping.
The care of your child has con-
fined you too closely to the house
and interfered with the little social
successes which help to keep the av-
erage woman happy.
Your husband takes you for
granted and has discontinued the
endearments which previously made
you feel that you were a pleasure
to him. Consequently, you have
lost the sense of your own value
That is why you're unhappy.
Now let us see what to do about
it. You feel inferior to your hus-
band because he has a better educa-
ton than you have. That is easily
remedied. If your intellectual Gu
rioSity is great enough, you can edu-
cate yourself and have lot of fun
in the process.
The public library is free. The
worlds knowledge is available
While you're tied at home with
your child you can read. When
the new term begins you can take
some courses at the Indiana uni
versity extension division. You've
fallen behind intellectually, but you
can catch up in no time if you make
the effort.
Your second trouble is that your
husband doesn't make love to you
any more. This behavior is quite
common among husbands. After
they have become accustomed to
physical familiarity with woman,
then do not feel the same enthusi-
asm that they felt while she still
was more or less of a mystery.
Love is not the Self-SuStaining
emotion that women suppose it to
be. It will not keep going on its
own momentum, but must be re-
created from day to day. This can
be achieved by fresh experiences
shared by the partners, by new
ideas which stimulate the interest,
and by occasional vacations which
cause the lovers to feel the pinch of
loneliness.
Love easily breaks down under
strains which it never was meant to
bear. Perhaps the greatest of these
strains is monotony. When followed
too closely, the Domestic routine is
narrow to women. The man who
comes home to exactly the same
woman every night seeks elsewhere
for excitement to replace the safety
Of home.
The wise wife does not remain the
same 365 days in the year. One
night she may be all aglow about a
book she has read. or a concert she
has heard. Another, she may be
enthusiastic about some small do
nestle detail, like changing the cur
I aims.
4 Still another, she may be wholly
physical, warm, loving and provoca-
/ i've. The point is she does not re-
main static. but bubbles and boils
with new interests and enthusiasts.
Sometimes I suspect the success
/ full wife of leaving one corner Of her
husbands heart just a little bit
/ hungry. Far be ii from her to Starve
him. Her nature is too generous for
/ that
But on occasion she can retire
within her own individuality to a
place where he can not follow. She
does not smother him with love, but
is capable of Withholding some in
tangible portion of herself, for
which he perpetually thirsts.
=
1t would be wiser for you to ig-
more your husbands interest in this
other woman. 1t may be figment
of your imagination. fear born OF
your feeling of inferiority.
Let your husband see all the
other women he wishes, but see to
it that they suffer when he COM
pares them with you. This can
not be achieved by casting dispar-
agement upon them, but by becom-
ing more interesting and inviting
yourself.