Evening star., 1933-12-10

sneezed and finally founced out of the bar
room, still sneezing
As the doors of the Silver Dollar Buffet
closed behind her. Mr.. McGuelph let him
self 60. His pent-up mirth exploded in q
below of laughter that shook the chandelier
With each Homeric ho-ho, his rudy cheeks
grew ruddier; their pink deepened to magenta
and their magenta to purple. And then quite
suddenly Mr.. Guelph stopped laughing and
pitched forward across the bar never to rise
again.
The coroner called it apoplexy. But to the
ladies of the East Teabone Temperance Society
1T was convincing demonstration of divine
vengeance, and from that time on they fought
with renewed vigor, secure In The knowledge
that providence was on their side
THERE vas great rejoicing in 1920 when
their long battle was won. They settled back
to rest on their morals, relinquishing Dode
Slatterbury and their own responsibilities to
the strong arm of the law Aunt Eulalie took
up in quick succession Coue.sm, nah jongg.
hooked rugs. contract bridge, the philosophy of
Able Dimnet and jlg-saw puzzles But her
heart wasn't in them
Early this year, however az sentiment
against prohibition rose to formidable pro-
portions, Aunt Eulalie began to perk up bit
Speaking as veteran campaigner who knows
her terrain, she conceded New York to the
vets. it was so exposed to the pernicious IN
huence of Europe that it couldn't be coa-
Sldered a part of the United States ANYHOW
She conceded all the Eastern States for the
same reason; they were exposed to the per-
nicious influence of New York. After ALL"
she reminded her fellow workers ccusolingly,
ftln WIRE 1alox =,
sents the real America. These farmers will
never desert our standard
But all signs fail in a dry year. to say
nothing OF dry decade. One b. one the
faithful climbed off the water-wagon Now
Aunt Eulalie finds herself the leader of for
1orn minority; she has the glamour of one VINO
has battled valiantly for a lost cause and she
can share the losers laurels with Gen Gus
ter. Sir Thomas Upton, William Jennings Bry-
an. Eugene Debs, Jack Dempsey, Alfonso XIII,
the Boston Red Sox and people Who try to stop
busses at the wrong places. And best Of all,
now that drinking is purely a personal problem
she and the girls can start working on Dode
Slatterbury again.
As for Dode, no one welcomes repeal more
joyfully than he He has missed the f1uttering
attentions of the temperance workers. for the
enforcement officers were so preoccupied with
local politics that they practically igncred him
There was little or no incentive to climb. In
fact, the last time saw Dode climbing to the
top OF lamp post he informed me that he
was cold sober
II clumb up here so I won't get bumped"
he explained. when these young folks tank
up on bathtub gin an then run their ottymo-
beels hell-belt through Main stree: an old man
amt safe in the gutter. Unfair competition,
] calls it,"
OF course, since the new dealers have under
taken to regulate this competition, Dode may
again climb for the sheer love OF climbing,
just as he did before prohibition. Aunt Eulalie
and the East Teabone Temperance Society ex-
pect great things of him; they have their pledge
cards all ready.
But doubt whether Dode Slatterbury will
ever regain his old-time prestige as the village
drunkard He has suffered the fate of all
latter-day hedonists. His profession has been
ruined by amateurs