davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington times., 1933-04-22

who's so ritZy he won't even
talk to himself without being
announced.
A report from San Francisco
says that One-Eyed Connolly
was almost drowned the other
day trying to crash the Golden
Gate.
A successful linguiSt is a man
who can wire home for money
in any language.
There's the son Of a we'll
known screen star who's so far
back in school that his father
had to buy him a pair Of field
glasses so that he can see the
teacher.
A new archery range has just
opened on Vine Street and
Groucho Marx says it makes a
dandy practice place for old
fashioned women who/Want to
shoot their husbands with a bow
and arrow.
(Copyright. 1898, King Features
Syndicate Ine.)
The Washington times., 1933-04-22

A new restaurant opened in
the Times Square district last
week and the proprietor is Moth
ing short of a genius. He gets
the Salvation Army to play in
front of his cafe every evening
so that he can advertise an Or
cheStra.
The Washington times., 1933-04-22

A~4 va
Out of such
depths as !
have n ev r
k n o W n be-
fore. For life
was easy. I
was you n g
a n d strong.
I W ork e d,
S u &C e e d ed.
l a u G h ed at
b S t a cles-
and boasted
I was mas
ter Of my
fate"
B u t no W
Tim NOR hn.
The Washington times., 1933-04-22

Several authors have gone
into a new kind of literary
work. They're supplying women
with pasts so that they can
write for the confession maya
aZines.
The Washington times., 1933-04-22
Among the IlIiterati

A college boy committed sui
eide last month because he
failed in literature. He couldn't
think of any wisecracks for his
Slicker.
The Washington times., 1933-04-22
AutOSuggeStiOn

Every married man should
have two cars: one for pleas
ure and one to take his wife
out in.
The Washington times., 1933-04-22
No Dictator Yet
There isn't any dictator here, yet, or any
But We Get Things Done

There isn't any dictator here, yet, or any,
body specifically authorized say Laws that do not like
hereby abolish but make changes conservave where we
think necessary.
For instance the antquated antitrust law which has done as
much as anything else to interfere with effective business
ganzation thrown overheard that stands the way
OF the farm BILL The Senate specifically agrees that far
the farm bill goes, that antitrust law is dead
The Senate votes one hundred million
dollars to help the Agricultural Department in its prce
ing program for farmers used to be said that you cannot
lift yourself by your bootstraps perhaps you can
somebody gives you $1000000 900 to help
Fitzpatrick, able eartoonist Of the St. Louis
PosDpatch what coming and Monday last above
the title The Uneasy Gods showed idol labelled God
Standard looking crosseyed and worried another labelled
"The Constitution, also worried.
The gold standard idol has fallen but in spite Mr. Ber
nard shaws advice to get rid Of Constitution Americans
will probably hang on to the other one.
France by the expected to abandon the gold standard
with England and America off of it, and there ought to be
interesting complications in the worlds various currencies
The curious part it is the fact that and the United
states have gold than England and all countries
together That makes you wonder whether gold really
powerful as it was supposed to be-
The latest Hitler order re-orsanzes COM
petely all Of Germany's lodges of Free Masonry Free
Masonry according to Hitler must be cty national and
Christian Jews may not join the lodges will be expelled
tOna Christian Order Frederick Great Queer person
Mr. Hitler with many things to learn unpleasant
The British fear that it will not be SO easy
to persuade that really don't need money lent
now that we have abandoned gold officially England gave
up the gold standard against her WILL after desperate efforts
to retain it. This country dved into the nogOld waters
gaiy small boy jumping into pond in the spring freely
Of its accord And will be able say to the coun
tries Of Europe: YOu see off the gold basis So
please pay.
For long time England and Russia will be
suspicious scornful Of each other.
The English these times do not relish giving up Russian
trade, but "facesaving" may compel it.
Russian authorities make plain that they don't what
England anybody else does and not afraid of ANY
BODY That usual in times of revolutionary excitement
The French from Mirabeau Mara deed the world and
did successfully And then the Italian CorsCan Bonapate
The Washington times., 1933-04-22
MAYBE I'M WRONG!
By John P. Medbury

was arrested the other day for
using oleomargarine in his
sandwiches,
The Washington times., 1933-04-22
The One Hundred and
Thirtieth Psalm

"OUT OF THE DEPTHS
HAVE I CRIED UNTO THEE,
The Washington times., 1933-04-22

There's a swelled-headed ex-
ecutive over on Fifth Avenue
The Washington times., 1933-04-22
Take It Or Leave It

Smart wives are no longer
shooting their husbands. It's
hard to get alimony out of a
corpse.
The Washington times., 1933-04-22

American Tragedies
The owner Of a drug store on
Broadway, who has been selling
whisky and gin for six years,
The Washington times., 1933-04-22
Efficiency Experts

GAAACACuCy GAPOAG 70
Edward G. Robinson never
complained about the way the
laundry returns his collars. He
paints them black and sells
them for hackSaWS.
The Washington times., 1933-04-22

And he must navigate the raft
With vigorous and skillful hand,
And there are breakers to be passed
Before he can regain the land.
The Washington times., 1933-04-22

and it won't be long now until
most Of the penitentiaries will
have overStuffed electric chairs.
The Washington times., 1933-04-22
Social Accomplishments

Our jails nowadays are going
in for more modern comforts
The Washington times., 1933-04-22
The latest Hitler order re-orsanizes con

pletey all Of Germany's lodges of Free Masonry Ere
Masonry according to Hitler must be rctly national
Christian. Jews may not join the lodges will be expee
from them and Free Masonry will be made part of the
Mr. Hitler with many things to learn, unpleasant
The times-news. [volume] (Hendersonville, N.C.) 1927-current, 1933-01-20
RURAL MAIL DELIVERY is IN DANGER

Great anxiety is felt by thousands of rural peo-
pie living on routes where mail is delivered daily,
because of the announced policy from Washington
favorable to cutting down rural mail delivery in
the interest of economy.
Already it is made plain that the Washington
plan is to consolidate thousands of routes elimi-
nate some altogether and cut daily delivery to three
times a week. What this means to rural people
who have been getting their mail at their own door
or near it every week day of the year is widely
sensed and strong protest is being made against
the eurtailment plan
What is needed in Washington is reduction in
the operating expenses of the government, and
not so much effort to increase the cost of postage
and reduction in the facilities for furnishing the
people of the country with their mail and papers
which are a part of the educational development
of the nation.
Daily newspapers are finding it most difficult in
the delivery of their mails, on account of the dis
continuance of trains, and the failure of the gov
eminent to supply transportation to take thei,
places. The government should make an arrange
ment with the buses to handle mails to points not
reached by adequate train schedules
The Times hopes when the Democrats take
charge of the government in Washington. they vii
reduce expenses to the point where they can serve
the people with adequate mail facilities.-Times
New Bern.
The times-news. [volume] (Hendersonville, N.C.) 1927-current, 1933-01-20

TIND Freely took the trap in
band and said, II think I
understand the way to open up this
thing. I've seen such traps before.
'I must be careful as can be. The
spring is very strong, you see. 1
also must be careful with the
beast. It's paw is sore"
AS Windy watched, he said, ITS
true that it is very nice of you to
be kind to that animal, but are
you safe from harm?
ct wonder, when the beast is free,
If twill get wild as wild as. can be.
Supposin' it should jump at you?
That fills me with alarm"
THEN Quincy added, "Windy's
l. right! You may be in an awful
plight, Why, I have heard that
every fox is tricky. Please watch
out!
when once the trap is open
wide, we all should race away and
hide. If anyone is caught twill be
the end of him, no doubt"
This made old Freely laugh
aloud. Said he. "My what a funny
The times-news. [volume] (Hendersonville, N.C.) 1927-current, 1933-01-20
SENATE STIFFNESS

When states send representatives and senators
to Washington they expect these men to so equip
themselves as to be credit to both the state and
the nation. These men not sent to the national
capital with the idea that each shall be dictator
and have his own way about federal legislation.
Such program would embroil the nation in end
less controversy and friction.
We have such situation at present because one
egotistical senator from Louisiana has usurped I'M
to himself the power of senate control by use o.
the flibuster and this man Long states that he
will continue to filibuster until he has his own
way.
Long cannot be criticized alone for his action.
1t is the United States senate body itself that is
to blame for rules that will permit such an action.
Cloture should be invoked. When any senator be-
comes i'll with Uranium expansion he should have
rest and quiet prescribed for him by his associates.
1t was never the intention of our forefathers
that should dictate to the senate and to
the nation as "Hooey" Long has done. Long was
bad enough as governor of Louisiana. He has not
improved since going to Washington.-Rock Hill
Is. c. Herald.
The times-news. [volume] (Hendersonville, N.C.) 1927-current, 1933-01-20
CADET HILL TAKING
SURVEYING COURSE

Cadet J. 0. Hill, son Of w. Fl.
Hill of 4l6 Second avenue east,
who is q member of the sopho-
more class of The Citadel, is at
present taking the new surveying
elective course offered to the
second year men. His professors
report that he is making a very
satisfactory record.
The engineering course at The
Citadel has been greatly strength
ened this year by allowing these
sophomores who are maJoring IN
engineering to take surveying in
addition to mechanical drawing.
This will allow the juniors to
take an extra subject which was
being taught in the senior year
and permit the seniors either to
take an extra course or expand
one OF their present courses so
that they will have wider and
more thorough knowledge of en-
cheering when they graduate
from The Citadel.
Cadet Hill holds the grade Of
corporal in the R. o. 7. c. regi-
ment Of the Military college Of
South Carolina.
The times-news. [volume] (Hendersonville, N.C.) 1927-current, 1933-01-20
CUSSED, NOT CREDITED

The usual Chamber of Commerce is likely to be
cussed locally for its many failures rather than
credited with the occasional successes which come
only because there have been so many tries
The average cusser-of course this does not ap-
ply to you, dear reader-is one who does not do
any work to help the Chamber of Commerce make
higher batting average of successes.
SO far as the Goldsboro organization goes we'll
admit that we of this newspaper organization have
cussed many time and sometimes with degree
Of feeling near to ferocity. We are glad to say.
however, that we have managed to keep any such
personal reactions out of print and that our print
ed words have almost always save for occasional
gentle kidding, attempted to forward the aspira-
tons and the efforts of the Chamber of Commerce
This week offers every cusser of the Chambe7,
of Commerce in Goldsboro his chance. The Cham
Der is run by those of its membership who care -
be active
| Cusser, join em.
| Get active.
Make the organization what you have been saw
ing 1t ought to be. That is your chance to help
your own success and individual interests through
helping in development of the town.-Goldsboro
News Argus.
The times-news. [volume] (Hendersonville, N.C.) 1927-current, 1933-01-20
Absentee Ballot s;:.
Law Drive Begun
Two Local Bills Already
Introduced on Issue
The Times-News Burenu
Sir Walter Hotel

RALEIGH, Jan. 20.-The oppo-
sition to the states absentee bal
lot law, long a sore spot in state
politics, came to bat introduced
two statewide bills and one local
bill to repeal the law in the gen.
eral asemsbly here Wednesday.
Senator George Mcneil Of Fay
etteville, introduced the senate
bill to repeal the absentee ballot
law. while Representative r. +.
Beasley of Monroe, Union county,
introduced the house bill. Repre-
sentative Charles Hutchins of
Yancey county also introduced a
bill to repeal the absentee ballot
law as it applies to Yancey coun-
ty. The bills were referred to the
committees on elections.
Every session of the general as
sembly sees a number of bills in
troduced to abolish the absentee
ballot, but none of these have
ever been enacted so far, not be-
cause this ballot is regarded as
Just and ESSENTIAL, but because
most of the local political leaders
want it retained and are afraid
to give it up. In counties that are
preponderantly Democratic or Re-
publican, there is not much inter
est in the Law and most of these
would be willing to have it repeal
ed. But in counties where the
two major parties are evenly di-
vided and where difference Of a
The times-news. [volume] (Hendersonville, N.C.) 1927-current, 1933-01-20

Charles S. Whitman in New York City. He was a
Young man of unusual qualities. He graduated
from Williams at the head of his class in 1905. He
had been with DR.. Wilfred T. Grenfell in Labrador
and Dr. Grenfell was his best man at the wedding
He studied law at Harvard Law School and entered
Mr.. Whitman's office. He became assistant to
President Garfield at Williams where he remained
several years and since then has followed various
activities At the present time he is professor of
law at Harvard College.
Mrs Sayre was born at Gainesville, Ga, when
her father was an obscure college professor. He
was teaching at Bryn Mawr, Pa. at the time. He
was 81 years of age and Mrs. Wilson was 26. Mrs.
Wilson had gone South to be with friends in her
old home when her second child was born. Jessie
Wilson was educated under German governess,
attended schools in Princeton, went to Goucher Col
lege in Baltimore, and undertook settlement work
in Philadelphia. During the period Immediately
preceding her marriage she had been engaged in
work with the national board of the Young Wom-
ems Christian Association.
Mr. and Mrs Sayre had a brilliant White House
wedding an afternoon in the Indian summer of
1913. The ceremony took place in the historic
East room of the White House. Miss Eleanor Ran
dolph Wilson, later Mrs. William Gibbs McAdoo,
was her bridesmaid and the guests included the
distinguished men of the day in Washington and
the country at large.
She passes away after brief illness and leaves
three children, Francis Bowles, Eleanor Arson and
Woodrow Wilson. She and her husband lived a
particularly interesting life They had both passed
through hard experiences in actual contact with
the world before they were married. Both were Of
humanitarian and philanthropic nature. They
have spent their married life in the atmosphere Of
New England. The Times laments that this talent
ed woman passes cat a time when she was doing
so much in service for her community and the
world."-Charlotte Observer.
The times-news. [volume] (Hendersonville, N.C.) 1927-current, 1933-01-20
Fletcher to See
Minstrel Show

FLETCHER, Jan. 20. - The
Dandy Dozen Minstrels, a musi-
cal show produced by persons
connected with the Henderson
County Fair association, will APP,
pear at the Fletcher high school
on Saturday evening, Jan. p, at
1880 o'clock.
The minstrel cast is made up
of II persons, including j. ".
Cowell who in 1927 and 1928
played with Clarke Gable in
Rain" and Wade King, Francis
Simmons, Buddy Britt and Hamp-
ton johnson all of Henderson
vile. Specialties will include
songs by the East Hendersonville
quartet and J. C. Coston. 1t will
be presented as a benefit for
athletics in the Fletcher school
and for the fair association
The times-news. [volume] (Hendersonville, N.C.) 1927-current, 1933-01-20
NEWSPAPERS OPINIONS
JESSIE Will SON SAYRE

Incidental in the news of the past few days, and
incidental, only, so far Southern papers are
concerned, to the self-reproach of The Observer,
was Information of the death of Mrs. Jessie Will
son Sayre, second daughter of the late President
Woodreys Wilson, at the age of 40 years. The first
and sonly editorial tribute We have seen to Mrs
Sayre comes from The Watertown Times, pr per
published in upper New York, by an editor who
keeps close tab on southern history and who is
given to intelligent discussion of southern person.
aities and events. The Times recalls that this
ond daughter White House bride of 1918.
Her father had been president about six months
when she married Francis B. Sayre. He was az
that time in the law office of District ATTORNEY
The times-news. [volume] (Hendersonville, N.C.) 1927-current, 1933-01-20
READ THE STORY. THEN COLOR THE PICTURE

crowd! You Tinymites imagi,
things that never will come true
"Who said this was a fox, z
son? Why, it's a tame dog, fuIa
fun. I'm positive. VIXEN it is hs
twill want to play with YOU"
ssTHEN free it! Free it," CT
l. cried. "I'll gladly star!ltt
by it's side end pat it, 50 will
know that we are friendly ltf
boys"
Just then the trap sprun! open
wide. "Well, there's your neE
friend" Freely cried. The dog BE-
gan to bark and, my, it made ID
of noise.
Wee Copy did as he had said ,
would. He grabbed the big Dog
head and said, Hello there, pa.
Now everything will be all right
The ether TIMES laughed in 81
because it was a sight TO see u
TIMES little rabbit friends all U!
ing to hide from sight.
(Copyright, 1888. NEA Service i'S
(The TIMES meet the owner
the dog. in tho next storyj
The times-news. [volume] (Hendersonville, N.C.) 1927-current, 1933-01-20
BEHIND THE SCENES IN
WAS HLlGION
with RODNEY DUICHEly

lend three X. f. G. billions TO
farmers who could wangle a so per
cent reduction in their mortgage in.
debtedness, Hull offers this, meas
ure, which he explains IS follows:
Everybody is now trying to
achieve a temporary or permanent
relief for the farmer. But condi.
lions are so badly dislocated and
price levels are so low that the
present is not an apt time for the
application Of any scheme for per.
manent relief.
I.THIS bill of mine segregates
two years as a period during
which agriculture may be at ease.
The psychology Of the plan should
help restore confidence and lead to
a gradual readjustment Of prices
and values. At The end Of that Pc
riod, I think, the farmers should
be several billion dollars bitter off.
at would lower the interest level
on all farm mortgages for at least
two years and perhaps lower it per.
manently, for the +. F. c. would
lend at per cent to carry whatever
existing obligations might be neces.
sary. II would contact and lend
so as to secure for two years such
farmers as might be up against
mortgages but who were unable to
pay interest despite use Of ordi.
nary diligence. And by advances tc
taxpayers who arc temporarily de
linquent we can reopen schools now
,, closed because counties AID com
munities are unable to support
them.
"This method of emergency re
lief is direct, simple and practical
It is infinitely more reasonable
than the r. f. G.. loans to rail
roads ard banks because it involve!
so, 100000 people who are the bed
rock of our entire business cond'
ton"
The times-news. [volume] (Hendersonville, N.C.) 1927-current, 1933-01-20


fey. votes. may, turn an d.
either way, the local Lead IeSt;
the law retained. 1t is aos u,
agreed that many local 1 aIasiia
have been won by the ir, Tf,:o
use of absentee ballots 'N ny
never publicly admitted. N'0a
The use Of absentee ball.. ,
usually been limited 70 W." w.
elections rather than in nro; SeNe
But the scandal in SURF a.
in connection with the ;II,, .Cu'
of absentee ballots in tho 81 u.
cratic primary of last ,Iln Dse
served to focus attention nr' 'tS
phase of the question and i'm "
up still more opposition ~. ~
the entire absentee ballot vs. "-'J
a result, it is agreed tI,,'
chances for its repeal seem /, .
than ever before. But ~ wy
timers still seriously doub, =,
of these bills will ever noi r,.
the committees OF ever l.,
acted.
The times-news. [volume] (Hendersonville, N.C.) 1927-current, 1933-01-20
BY RODNEY BUTCHER
Me- Service IYrifcr

WASHINGTON. - Various forms
" Of 1nfGtion-or '.rehation"--
arc being proposed by those who
want to relieve the. farmer of his
burden of debt.
Imitation would be a form of
emergency relief-rclief for the
farmer whose taxes and mortgage
charges threaten to deprive him of
his farm home. The most popular
proposal for permanent relief is
the voluntary domestic allotment
plan, which is likely to be passed
by this Congress or the next in an
attempt to subsidize the farmer
onto a price level which will give
him some pretense of economic
equality with the rest of the pop
ulation.
But the form of emergency re-
lief which the farmer is most like
ly to receive from Congress is
something akin tc the propose. Of
Senator Cordeli Hull of Tennessee,
who would use the Reconstruction
Finance Corporation to save the
farme: from mortgage sales and
foreclosure sales.
Hull would have the R. F. G. Gd-
vance stricken farmers sufficient
funds to protect them from mort
gage sales and tax sales.
HULL has introduced a bill
IL which would lend up to ST.,
000,0OO,0Oo To- hard.pressed farm
ers. The bill proposes to lend money
at 8 per cent to farcoers who need
that money to pay mortgage inter
est and taxes.
II is a conservative measure. in
trcduced by . conservative states
man. Hull is the father Of the in
come tax and is the foremost
authority in Congress on tariffs.
And so, while Senator George OF
\ s0rgia offers hill which would
The times-news. [volume] (Hendersonville, N.C.) 1927-current, 1933-01-20
Yerv Rare Marsupial

The curator of the mammals sec
ton of the Adelaide Museum has
discovered in Central Australia one
Of the rarest marsupialS, Caloprym.
nus Campestris Ga rat kangaroO) Of
which no living specimen has been
seen for hundreds Of years. The
only three specimens known are in
the British museum.
The times-news. [volume] (Hendersonville, N.C.) 1927-current, 1933-01-20
Fish's Defense

The glObefish, or sea hedgehog,
has the faculty of initiating its stom-
ach with air or water. The body is
covered with tough skin, without
scales, but provided with spines'
When the stomach is inflated the
fish assumes a globular form and
the spines protrude, forming n de-
Tense arrnOr. A fish thus blown out
turns over and floats belly upward
driving before the winds and waves.
The times-news. [volume] (Hendersonville, N.C.) 1927-current, 1933-01-20
"Head's Right Grants"

In early days every immigrant
who came to this country and paid
his own way was in many Of the
states given 80 acres Of land for his
own use and 20 acres more for every
other person imported by him,
These were called heads right
grants. These allotmentS of land
were assignable, and this was a
common method of acquiring large
estates.
The times-news. [volume] (Hendersonville, N.C.) 1927-current, 1933-01-20
MARRIAGE LAW CHANGES AS
PASSED BY HOUSE WOULD END
MARRIAGES IN BORDER STATES

Mecklenburg couples go to South
Carolina to marry" He said the
present law was "entirely mop
'erative" and that the very per-
sons against whom the law is
directed are the ones who go
across the state line to the mar
riage mills of South Carolina
and Virginia"
The times-news. [volume] (Hendersonville, N.C.) 1927-current, 1933-01-20
"Northers"

Gales of north wind, are n.
as "northers." In Southern 9,
they blow across Texas 10 tho q
following the passage OF a low
or cyclone. The contrast in
perature is generally very m,,
as the preceding winds are r.,
moist, southerly.
The times-news. [volume] (Hendersonville, N.C.) 1927-current, 1933-01-20
Evolution Theory

EvolutiOn's strongest supporters,
men like Huxley, Hooker and Lyell,
had to admit that, while the general
principle seemed unaSSaiIable, there
were very many confusing problems
awaiting solution.