davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington times., 1933-01-03
SNAPPY V1SE-CRACKS

In the dark street the reveller
approached a policeman.
"Offisher," he said, falter-
ingly, I'm lookin' for a park
ing place"
The policeman looked hard
at him.
But you've no car, sir" he
said.
"Oh, yes, I have!" said the
reveller. ITS in the parking
place I'm looking for"
-Tit-BitS
A young man from the Amazon,
Put nighties of his Gramazon,
The reasons that, he was too
fat,
To get his own Pajamazon.
-Bucknell Belle Hop
The Washington times., 1933-01-03

4AN "AAAe
II don't expect he knows he
is the wealthiest dog in the
world and that his steaks and
dog biscuits are paid for out Of
his own pocket"
my Christmas gift to the
club is two new members. They
are Thomas Fortune and Ruby
Cash, the latter a sister of
Frank Cash, already a member
Of the club.
81 wrote to Jimmie Stadtler
THANKSGIVING and I wrote his
sister Louise this morning. It
il too bad she is in q sani-
tarium isn't it? / hope she
gets well soon and can come
home.
''PIease excuse me for writing
twice asking to be enrolled as
a member. The very day I
mailed my second letter the
first one appeared in the col
umn. OF course I could not
stop it then because / can't
rum fast enugh to catch a mail
train"
Two old members of our
club are Dallas and Charlotte
The Washington times., 1933-01-03

The first--Of-the-week Adven-
ture Club Hour over VOL is
scheduled for 4 o'clock this
afternoon.
Start the New Year by listen
ing for the latest news of your
club.
The story of Red" fam
Gus Chicago dog millionaire,
brought forth a long letter
from our Waynesboro, Va,
member Junior" Crowder.
Junior" writes:
RICH DOG
Gas Red is a dog he doesn't
know he has all that money,
but If he did I expect he would
be very happy, / know would.
The Washington times., 1933-01-03

The staff doctor Of an elec-
trio. company has discovered
that one Of the employees has
two hearts, which makes up
for some Of the heartless en-
ployers. Punch.
The dancer took his partner
down to supper, and objected
to the manner in which the
waiter looked at her.
"See here, my man." he said,
what do you mean by staring
so rudely at this lady?"
The waiter looked surprised
and answered: ''It isn't rude
ness, sir. its admiration. This
is the fifth time she has been
down to supper tonight"
-EVerybody's.
The Washington times., 1933-01-03

like this! I got tired Of it after
q while and so T left him."
She started out Of the room.
you'll get tired Of it, too" She
threw the words over her shoul-
der as she went.
Kim slept until II o'clock the
next morning, although Mary
Faith went into his room three
The Washington times., 1933-01-03

times and did her best to wake
him up. When he finally did
get up he showed no i'll effects
Of the night before. His eyes
were clear and his skin was
fresh and ruddy.
He sang 1--WE Been Working
on the Railroad" as he took his
shower, and he ate his usual
The Washington times., 1933-01-03

/ have o cat
Tab w h o
K n o VS. i'll
tr e q t m e mt
fr m good
and / know
t h q t Red
must miss his
mistress. I ex-
pect he is
p o n d e ng
over whether
or not he'll
get another
So -~AI
But I don't
expect that
hA zw,SVR
The times-news. [volume] (Hendersonville, N.C.) 1927-current, 1933-05-25
NEWSPAPERS OPINIONS
RECALLING OLD LESSONS

Instead of learning a lot from the experiences
of the past few years, business has recalled loS
of things it used to know and had forgotten dur
ing boom times
That's the way Samuel NJ Vauclain, head of tn"
Baldwin Locomotive Works, puts it, and this Is d
happy, truthful way Of presenting the philosophy
of the mistakes which have been made and the
sane corrections that are now taking place.
Business lost it's head during the orgy OF spend
ing along with individuals who were supposed to
be far less stupid In fact, there is a sense III
which the whole mass-action of the American PEG
pie during the heydey of their prosperity was un'
der the domination of that keen, influential and
dominant leadership of men sitting in high places
and whose voices carry far and effectively.
Back in those times the outstanding business or
financial leader who stuck to the same old con-
servatisms of preceding years or who dared lift
his voice in protest against the way people were
helm. swept off their feet was harangued as out
of-date and unconscious of the new principles OF
business and the modern plan Of Weath-gettihg
which had come into being.
Mr.. Vauclain is trying in his utterance merely
to make the point that it is not so much new
courses of action which are needed, fresh prlnci'
pies upon which to proceed, as it is an obedient
attitude toward age-old laws Of business and life
forgotten in the Authorizations of the decade end
ing in 1929.
And one wonders if when the depression IS
finally conquered and the American people eaten
up again prosperous stride, they will have proh''
ed from the grmness and tragicness OF their pres
ent experiences or whether they will again, for
getfu of proven virtues and demonstrated ver'
ties fly of into wild orgy of spending and debt
amassing.
1t is none toe soon to be thinking in that dl
rection. Lessons are easy to forget, especially
such lessons as human nature likes to let slide
stern truths that are always less preferable 10
easy. honeyed fction.-Charlotte Observer
The times-news. [volume] (Hendersonville, N.C.) 1927-current, 1933-05-25
ADMINISTRATION ...
WILL SOON BEGIN
REPEAL CAMPAIGN

WASHINGTON, May %. (UP).
The Widespread and powerful
Democratic party machinery soon
will be thrown into the admins
tratiOn's effort to effect repeal
of the 18th amendment, Post
master General Farley announced
last night.
Farley, chairman Of the Demo
cratic national committee, said he
soon would instruct the organiza-
ton responsible for electlng
President Roosevelt, to get out
and work to repeal the dry law.
The postmaster general said
the move had the entire support
Of the president.
That the administration would
act soon to infuse new life into
the repeal movements was exclu-
sively forecast few days ago by
the United Press.
Shortly thereafter, President
Roosevelt in a message to con-
gress emphasized that new taxes
be imposed for financing the ad-
ministration's new public works
program, should be removed
when repeal Of prohibition or
business improvement brought
added revenues to the treasury.
The times-news. [volume] (Hendersonville, N.C.) 1927-current, 1933-05-25
BEER ADVERTISING

We are reminded by Norman Rose, advertising
manager of Christian Science Monitor, that some
newspapers a"d weekly publications IN England do
not carry beer advertisements as matter OF prin-
cipie. For instance, the world-famous humorous
journal Punch does not accept that class OF Dusl-
ness 1t has not sold space for the advertisement
of alcohol since 1928.
When the Volstead Act was written liquor ad-
vertisements had been banned from large num-
Der of weekly newspapers and considerable
number of daiies in the United States. Owing TO
the mild content of alcohol in the beer now legal
lied most newspapers are accepting the business,
though their proprietors are dry advocates. With
a return of hard liquor, however, some of these
newspapers we are told will rule out the adver-
tisements as they did years ago, and for1the same
reasons-Editor and Publisher. 80 ..''
The times-news. [volume] (Hendersonville, N.C.) 1927-current, 1933-05-25
BEEN DEALERS SELL STRONG
.' LIQUORS

Before Congress annulled the Constltu-
ton by passing the beer law, the predic'
ton was freely made that if the. manutac'
ture and sale of beer was legalized the
beer business would be used as blind Tor
the illegal traffic in strong liquors.
That is exactly what is happening IN
the big cities of the country, the wet
strongholds of the nation. In many OF the
legalized beer places in those cities all
kinds of intoxicants are sold. The sale OF
strong liquors is, of course, in violation OF
federal law and the" Constitution of the
United States.
There we find the beer dealers, licensed
under federal, State and municipal acts to
sell beer, engaged in selling strong liquors
in violation of the laws of the United
States. The beer dealers thereby show
their respect for law and their determine
ton to obey the law and to aid the highly
moral "wets" of the country in their TEN
perance" campaign.
Another interesting development in the
beer business is in Detroit, where the or
ganized gangs are Selling the business and
refusing to pay either federal or State
taxes. Many more very interesting devel-
opments are certain to come to pass as
these berry days go by. ......
The times-news. [volume] (Hendersonville, N.C.) 1927-current, 1933-05-25
GREAD THE STORY, THEN COLOR THE PICTURED

THE ladder that the TIMES
l. made, against the monstrous
tree was laid. The big wood
pecker eyed it, but kept pecking
At the tree.
Said Dotty, "E3y, that bird is
smart. His pccking IS a work OF
art. III bet he knows he's making
fine little home for me-"
me, too" cried GOldy. Don't
forget, that when the tree house
IS all set, we two are going TO
share it. 1t will be our home,
sweet home.
Now, if wild wind comes
along, twill be all right. Tie
house is strong. Well never find
a safer one, no matter where we
roam"
THEN Scouty shouted, Look!
L It's done! The bird has had a
lot of fun. l wish that he would
come down here and let us pet
his head"
The bird, however, flew away.
The bunch then heard wee Copy
say, Its getting dark. think
It's time for me to go to bed"
THAT suits me fine" said
Colby. Gee, here's where l climb
The times-news. [volume] (Hendersonville, N.C.) 1927-current, 1933-05-25

lie sleeping.
In short. they solicit you to
share her many wonderful secrets
which to the world, she says, are
unknown. Not only Key West but
all of Florida have learned the
gift of hospitality to tourists. Our
HoTGersonville might do well to
extend her energy along this line.
This Key West is not a large
city, yet it is one Of the Oldest
towns in the south. One writer
has said that if the elements could
speak they would relate many
startling tales concerning this sea-
region. This reminds us, too, that
if our glorious Land Of the Sky
could talk in common language
the world would cry out in aston
'ishment at such revelations OF
grandeur.
One would hardly desire to leave
the Land Of the Sky in order to
live in this beautiful town in the
sea, but it is surely a delightful
place to visit-and, Oh! the thrills
of the going and coming! 1t has
outside connections over its wa
tiers with the world from north,
south, east and west. and handles
more exports than any other port
in the state; it has more tropical
foliage than any other American
city; it has daily newspaper, The
Citizen. Going or coming, you
have the pleasure Of sea voyage,
in daytime, for over hundred
miles, without any annoyance of
sea sickness. .....
Coming to the mainland of
Florida, our trip took us through
the heart Of the Everglades where
miles and miles of sugar cane
fields, coming on for use at all
seasons, with extensive factories
for crushing and manufacturing
into sugar. on till the billy part
of the country is reached, in the
orange groves about Orlando, ks
simmee and to Lake Wales, where
lis located the unique and queer
Box Tower with its more than q
hundred bells set to music. 1t is
an uncommon place to visit. On
the evening Of our visit one scrup-
ulous old lady was heard to re-
mark, "They say Mr.. Box came to
this country from Ireland when
he was seven years old and got
The times-news. [volume] (Hendersonville, N.C.) 1927-current, 1933-05-25
THE LAWS DELAYS

President Thos a. Mellow of the State Bar AS
ISOLATION takes the courts of this state to task for
delays in melting out justice to offenders against
society," .'
He speaks wisely. Certainly it is not to the
credit of this nation that criminals and lesser evils
of society find it more easy to escape punishment
than most any other place on the globe. .
And as Mr.. Mellow states, the part played by
courts and juries and lawyers in allowing techni-
ealites and undue influences to thwart true justice
is nothing to their credit.
I 1t is not direct charge of dishonest practices
that the bar president had in mind but rather the
methods and practices of an unreasonable nature
involving subtle influences and technicalties that
brought forth criticism at the state convention this
week-Roek Hill Is. CO. Herald
The times-news. [volume] (Hendersonville, N.C.) 1927-current, 1933-05-25

his money from women Tor PRINT
ling a magazine, The Ladies Home
Journal, and with the money CIV
en- him by the men and women OF
this country built this wonderful
Itower POT feet high. but he was
mistaken if he thought this was
the first tower ever built IN TINS
world. for long ago the smart
folks over in Babylon thought
they would build one reaching all
the way to heaven, but the Lord
took it down, and if you believe
the Bible as | do, He will take
this one down and He will do it
during these days of trouble"
Such was the notion Of
the primitive old lady, but
the tower is built Of the very
best steel, and, unless a major cy-
clone happens to strike it, seems
pretty sure to Guido wind and
weather for long time after the
|! old lady herself passes. Her
thought was that human vanity
rather than the blessing OF man
kind was the chief inspiration Of
the tower builder.
We returned from our eXcur-
sion by way Of Daytona Beach in
time to witness the automobile
trace of the Englishman, Mr..
Campbell, who regards his exhi-
billions at DaytOna as being a sue
cess.
| Well. after all is said and done,
most Of us are. or seem TO be, I'M
pressed with the idea that we are
lin the common life-race to keep
up. in some way, with the world.
Otherwise we will be pretty sure
TO come out in the tail-end Of the
race.
Very sincerely.
THOS. J. HICKMAN.
The times-news. [volume] (Hendersonville, N.C.) 1927-current, 1933-05-25
BY RODNEY BUTCHER
NISt S.r,.fn. Nk'rg,.r

WASHINGTON. A re-delinitior
w of war" was one of the strong
est detectives in President Roose
yelts mind as he sent his historic
peace message to the nations OF
the world.
The world renowned war" as
national policy when it signed
the kellogg pact. But international
law recognizes state of war only
when q nation makes a formal
declaration of 1t.
And nations have been able to
wage what amounted TO war at
will, using twOdOllar words and
five-dollar phrases to describe
what they were up to under a
prettier name. Punitive expedi,
tons" protection of life and
property" maintenance of sacred
treaty rights" "self.defense opera.
tions"-those have been some OF
the expressions employed.
The climax of these absurditieS
came when Japan marched into
China in "self.defense" and kept on
going. The Japanese were quick to
compare their operations with past
interventions OF ours in Latin
America.
Now Roosevelt demands that all
nations individually agree that
they will send no armed force of
whatsoever nature across their
frontiers" If he has his way there
will be an end Of those mdeclared
wars and he is. even willing to ad-
nit that his proposed treaty would
bar this country from landing
marines in any small Latin-Ameri-
can republic.
TOR years there has been much
earnest, solemn talk about the
effectiveness of world opinion" in
deterring aggressive nations. Late
The times-news. [volume] (Hendersonville, N.C.) 1927-current, 1933-05-25
IFLIHTpS I"
GEORGE SCAR@.

up in the tree" Tho TIMES held
the ladder, so the two girli
wouldn't fall.
"Oh. what a fine place." lotty
cried. IT'S reilly nice and warn
inside" Good night" said
Scouty. Get up in the morning.
when We call"
F7HE balance Of the TIMES went
l. right over to their little tent,
1t wasn't long until they all were
sleeping very sound.
The long night drifted into day,
and then the lads heard Windy
say, Get up. have some bad
news. I've been out to look
around.
THE girls are missing from
their house. / sneaked up, quiet
as a mouse, but they were gone.
It's something that ! cannot I'M
derStand."
All of the TIMES rushed outside
and, very shortly, Scouty cried,
Hey, somebody has been here.
There are footprints on the sand"
Copyright, 1893, NEA Service, lnep
(Thc TIMES start out to find
GOldy and Dotty in the next
StoTy.)
The times-news. [volume] (Hendersonville, N.C.) 1927-current, 1933-05-25
TWO ARE BOUND TO
RECORDERS COURT

Walter Watzl and Oscar High
tower were bound to the county
recorders court Wednesday by
Mayor A. V. Edwards on charges
of having home brew and liquor
for the purpose Of sale and OPP
Grating disorderly house. High
tower was charged with aiding
and abetting in the case.
Bond for WatZl was set at ST..
coo and for Hightower at $500.
The two men were arrested on
Monday night by Officers CIar-
ence Edney. Castor Freeman and
Seth Edmundson a the Watzl
home on White street.
The times-news. [volume] (Hendersonville, N.C.) 1927-current, 1933-05-25
HAS 6o-DAY REPRIEVE

HAMMOND, La, May 25. (UP)
Commissioner of Finance Will
comb, recently sentenced to Jail
by Judge Nat Tiger for contempt
of court on charges growing out
of a slot machine trial, sprang a
surprise on policemen who went
to his home TO arrest him We'd
nesday by displaying a 60-day re-
prieve signed by Governor O. K.
Allen. The governor and Judge
Tiger are political enemies.
The times-news. [volume] (Hendersonville, N.C.) 1927-current, 1933-05-25
THE NEW SCHOOL SYSTEM

The new State School Commission has
been organized and is already busy with
plans for running the States eight-months
schools. One of the best things The Times
News has learned about the Commission IS
that O. j. Holler of Rutherford county is
the member for this district. This news
paper is not informed as to Mr.. Holler's
views about education and the public
school system, but takes it for granted
that he will render faithful service and
prove himself a friend of the schools. Mr..
Holler is one of the best and most useful
citizens in this section of the State. g.
The new school system is being roundly
condemned by thousands of citizens; and
it is certain that some provisions OF the
new law are going to be extremely I'M
popular; but now that the law has been
enacted and the schools must operate I'M
der its provisions, the best course for the
people to take is to make the best OF 1t.
All friends of public education in North
Carolina should maintain their interest III
the schools and endeavOr in every possible
way to encourage school officials anu
teachers in their efforts to preserve for the
people some of the results attained by the
States educational progress of the past
two or three decades.
Undoubtedly, the common school sys-
tenn of the State will be set back many
years by the adoption of the new law and
regulations; but, after the school system
has hit the bottom of the toboggan in the
next few years, it may have the emporium
ity to came back. In fact, it is practically
certain that a majority of the people Of
North Carolina, having seen something OF
real educational progress, will not be sat
isfed to stand by while everything that
has been gained is lost and the public
school system is utterly wrecked.
The State-suppOrted eight-months school
system is not the worst feature Of the new
law. The destruction of special districts is
one of the worst features. With this and
other provisions of the law goes about the
last vestige of local self government that
was left to the people of North Carolina.
Poorly paid teachers and inadequate pro-
vision for school expenses complete dis
NAL picture for friends of public educa-
ton to look upon.
An eight-months State-supported school
system, with sufficient money to meet nee
essary expenses and with teachers paid
reasonable salaries for their service; with
special districts left intact and some re-
sp0nsibility for the support and operation
of schools placed upon the patrons and
people directly interested in each COM
munity, might have been considered as in
line with educational progress in the State,
but the Legislature did not know where
to find the money to pay for school devel-
opment and educational progress, Sc we
have what we have.
The times-news. [volume] (Hendersonville, N.C.) 1927-current, 1933-05-25
ROOSEVELT GIVES VIEW
WAC TITNTCTON M,,OS TTD

w HSIllNN O-N, Nay ~. ~ J.
Emergency taxes will be elimi-
rated if the 18th amendment is
repealed, President Roosevelt said
today.
This means, he explained. au-
tomato adjustment Of those
lcvies now in effect and contem-
plated such as the proposed
$220,000,000 program for financ-
ing the huge public works pro-
The times-news. [volume] (Hendersonville, N.C.) 1927-current, 1933-05-25
BAYONETS HALT RIOT
OF AUSTRIAN NAILS

ELTWEG, Syria, Austria, May
%. - (UP). A riot of 1000
Nazis was suppressed last night by
boyonet charge by Gendar-
merle.
The Nazis were protesting the
police on a showing Of a film
about Chancellor Adolf Hitler Of
Germany.
Military aid was rushed Cor
the Gendarmerie, and the sol
diers occupied public buildings
and the Main streets.
The times-news. [volume] (Hendersonville, N.C.) 1927-current, 1933-05-25
W{,X|zz>;S::;jH:=INGTON
Will RODNEYQQ

lily such talk has commonly been
greeted by horse-laughs.
Behind RooSevelt's international
program is a determination to
organize that world opinion" and
make it function - partly by put.
ting on the spot any nation which
commits the clear-cut offense Of
stepping across a frontier with a
gun, partly by elimination of often
sive ornaments and partly by con.
sultative and other agreements.
Although the president has been
considering the issuance of some
such clarion call since last Janu.
airy, he saved it, trumpeted it at
vital moment and took magniti-
cent chance on turning a threaten.
ing situation into a constructive
victory. Germany was giving
Europe a dangerous case OF filters
and the cause of world cooperation
and reconstruction was badly jeop.
ardized by the increasing likeli'
hood that the World Economic Con-
ference would fail.
Win or lose, Roosevelt was In
position to re-eStablish a commando
ing moral leadership for this coun'
try at time when no other states.
man of the world had a chance OF
putting it over.
THE dispatch to "a foreign ma
u tons started over the cables at
5 o'clock in the morning. White
House correspondents were called
from their beds, told to come and
get their copies so that they might
prepare their files for early fore
noon release.
This careful timing was do
signed to catch the afternoon news
papers of Europe-some "A houn
ahead of the time they would be
filled with Chancellor Adolf Hit
ler's speech TO the Reichstag, which
many feared might explode q
bombshell on the contineat.
The times-news. [volume] (Hendersonville, N.C.) 1927-current, 1933-05-25

Beer twenty-five cents bottle. Milk five to
seven and half cents quart. What it takes to
pay fer a small bottle of beer wal buy three to
FIVE quarts of good sweet milk. Beer may have
calores a-plenty in it, but wonder if there aren't
many more calories in a quarters worth of milk
than in a quarters worth of beer.-The Marshvlle
Home. D.
The times-news. [volume] (Hendersonville, N.C.) 1927-current, 1933-05-25

At this season of the year, an optimist
is a man who believes his garden will pro-
duee vegetables as big as those pictured
in the seed catalogs.
The times-news. [volume] (Hendersonville, N.C.) 1927-current, 1933-05-25

gram.
The president believes that suf-
ficicnt revenues will acrue as a
result of the repeal to enable the
government to accomplish this
reduction in tax schedule.
The times-news. [volume] (Hendersonville, N.C.) 1927-current, 1933-05-25

Most people see nothing wrong with
dictators, provided they dictate to some
body else.
The times-news. [volume] (Hendersonville, N.C.) 1927-current, 1933-05-25

Perhaps the reason so many ex-bathing
beauties become star actresses in the
talkies is because they know their lines.
The times-news. [volume] (Hendersonville, N.C.) 1927-current, 1933-05-25
BIBLE THOUGHT
GODS WORD IN THE INAUGURATION

GODS WORD IN The INAUGURATION
TO- May the Lord grant that the administration
of President Franklin D. Roosevelt, so auspieiOusiy
begun in the atmosphere of the Holy Scriptures,
may be led and enlightened by the eternal truth
and righteousness which shines forth from the
pages of the Word of God!-(Condensed from
editorial in the Sunday School Times)
-Righteousness exalteth nation" (Ps. 1889.
"All Scripture is given by inspiration of God and
is profitable for instruction In righteousnesn.
q Tim. 3:f6). +7