The Waterbury Democrat., 1932-02-04
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Iy, "that lots of the sorts are bet ter, surer-happier, anyway. than the love between men and women. Take our love, Cissy, for each other and for Mary-Frances. We've al- ways had 1t, so we don't always appreciate 1t. But, honey, stop and think if you can what it amounts to. It is certain. 1t Is safe. Noth- ing can change 1t or hurt it, and 1t will last forever. Before I'd hurt you--as you've hurt now-Pd-Td take myself to pieces and cook me. l wouldn't want to live if I'd hurt you, Clssy. And you wouldn't hurt me, as I'm hurt now, not even to have Barry again. But these men, these mean men hurt us, and break our hearts, and go away and stay away and let us be hurt and suf- fer. Why should we accuse life of hurting us when it is only men. mean men who hurt us? And why should we value that love, mems love-old hateful, hurting, selfish love-so highly?''
 'I don't know. just want Barry. want to love him-whether he loves me or not. l want to see him hear his voice. 1 cant live, can't breathe without him. 1 can't, and 1 don't want to, and 1 won't try"
 You think that way now, but you'll find out later that you can. Someway you you get used to it. thought that way too, last month. That Sunday, Cisy-truly l was out of my mind, almost. I had a strange obsession that 1 was dead like the stories one reads, you know-and didn't know that I was dead, and was just walking around watching myself. But that passes off. Truly it does, hone. Truly it does. See how much betetr I am now? And it has only been a month ago to-day"
 Ann. don't want to be hateful But Barry and I were-are-I will say are. I will say Barry and I arc -are-are--"
 "Yes, darling. Of course. What are you?"
 We are different from you and Phil. In every way. Do you think, for instance that I'll ever look al another man? Do you think that could do as you've done? I don't blame you, but 1 mean I couldn't. I couldn't start right out to play with another man as you've started to play with that funny Kenneth thing. I couldn't. l wouldn't"
 That's just like saying, Cissy, honey, that if you were in one of those tropical places, being de- voured by mosquitoes and bugs and things, you'd sit down and let them 1ftyn J,,pt and wouldn't use a shoddy, inferior grade of netting to keep them off"
 Cecily cried a little more and said, No, Ann - you don't un- derstand. You don't understand"
 "I try to, dear. Dear, 1 do try to. I wish you had come with US thisafternoon, as 1 begged you to-, instead of staying in this stuffy old house. The river was lovely and we sWam-"
 Listen, Ann. The more I think of 1t. the more Pm sure that we didn't really quarrel. Will you listen while l tell you about it again, and see If it seems like q quarrel to you? 1 mean--if it doesn't seem to you that, after Bar rvs had time to think 1t over, he'll decide that 1t wasn't actually what he'd call a quarrel. told you. you know, that he said raised voices, and squawking sarcasms and things like that. I'm sure l didn't raise my voice. l never do .scream-do l, Ann? Truly, do I?'
 Honey, honey. of course not"
 Tt began about the party. Or did tell you about that?"
 Not all about it," lied poor Ann.
 '"I didn't say word. you know I didn't, when he went to Gretchen's s party in April, though he knew I hadn't been invited. He'd promised to go before--well, before we'd found each other. I didn't let him know l cared bit--was plcasa mt and nice about it as I could be. And he said he didn't have q good time at all, and was bored to death, and kept hopin gthat he could get away early enough to see me later But when the picnic came up in May I didn't say much either. said a little; and he explained that the crowd had been nice to him ever since he'd come back to Port land. and all guess I told you about how he was going to put q girl something like Gretchen in his next book---a self-made sophisti- cate he called her-and, well, didn't fuss even about the picnic. But when this third affair came up it simply got to be too much of a good thing. couldn't understand why he wished to go places, con- stantly, without me. 1 wouldn't have gone near any place where he hadn't been invited. l didn't say that he should not go. l just tried to find out, if possible, why he cared to go. And he said What did l say he said. exactly, Ann?"
 That he didn't care to go. But that the Steigerwalds had been very good to him. and that he'd rather sacrifice an evening than lie to them. And he reminded you that you'd rather get in early than lie to Grand and Rosalie in the morning. Wasn't that it? And that if you'd allow him to say that you and he were engaged, he'd be glad to say that he couldn't go. and why"
 "All that stuff! Conventional absurd. It wasn't Barry. Barry never takes the conventional atti- ture about anything. I can't under stand 1t. And I can't understand how we could have-well. even dis agreed about so trivial a thing as Gretch Steigerwald's darned old party. Ann, we couldn't have quar- reled over thing like Cretch Steigerwald's party!'