The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1932-02-22
LIGHTS kxv w1511:
Of NEW YORK

1uere W88 NEW LUX U6CuSIOE
who was smarter than most Of US.
He bought stocks low and sold
many Of them before the crash. Yet,
he was one Of the men deeply con-
cerned about present. conditions.
He had something to lose, and he
did not intend to lose it. Some OF
his money went into government
securities, some went into savings
banks: considerable sum he
turned into gold and put in safety
deposit boxes. He did not stint
himself on what he considered
necessities. but he was careful not
to indulge in luxuries. He said it
was no time to throw money
around. He died the other day.
They haven't been able to find a
will. The relatives certainly are
having a swell fight over his estate.
For some reason this makes me
think of a story friend told me
about an uncle of his. It seems
that this uncle spent his money In
a manner viewed with alarm by
members Of his family. They used
to demonstrate with him: speak
somberly Of a rainy evening; urge
economies; deplore the willful
waste which makes woeful want.
To their best intended warnings,
delivered only for his good. the
uncle would reply:
II may 60 to the poorhouse once.
You 60 there every day. I like my
way best"
The most expensive restaurants
and the cheapest restaurants are
the ones that are getting along best
in New York these days. The places
in between these two classes are
having a tough time. Even the boot
leggers are feeling what is known as
the depression. Customers who
used to buy several cases at a time.
now purchase their liquids by the
bottle.
There Is now 4 contrivance on the
market which, fastened to the win
dow, silences all the noises Of the
town while still permitting and
even encouraging air to enter. vii.
lard Fairchild says that this is vel!
enough, but that what really is
needed is a contrivance for win
dows in the country which will
soothe the visiting Manhattanite to
slumber by reproducing all the Diff
ferent sounds he Is accustomed.
Mr.. Fairchild thinks that perhaps
It might have to have some sort of
taxi horns, the rumble of the ele-
waited, and the fiat wheels on sur
face lines. A good inventor might
go even further. He could arrange
perhaps to sound the special note,
the voice Of the city from which the
visitor came.
-
A city fellow. who visited a small
village last summer, thought It
would be romantic to take a young
lady for an old-fashioned buggy
ride. The only horse available be-
longed to the local grocer and gen.
eral merchant. This led to compli.
cations. The man from the metrop-
oils couldn't steer a horse very well.
and the animal insisted upon turn
ing smartly into the yard Of any
good customer and stopping at the
back door. It was the delivery
wagon horse and It knew It's stuff.
It was a most conservative news
paper and the most conservative
person on 1t was the gentleman Of
the old school who ran the clipping
bureau, or "morgue." It was on
this old-timer's day off that the chief
editorial writer wished to make
some reference to the bomb outrage
in Wall Street. In order to be ex-
act, he sent for the clippings on that
subject. It was reported that no
clippings could be found. The ed
itor was annoyed; said they must
be there; asked under what head.
ings a search had been made. He
was, told there was nothing under
bomb" reds" explosions" 'out-
RACES" anarchists" ''cataclysms.'
"catastrophies." or any other head
which seemed to bear on the mat
ter. They finally got in touch with
the gentleman Of the old school.
Certainly it is there!" he exclaimed
Indignantly. "You will find all clip
pings concerning 1t filed under
.mishaps.'
Most Of the former New York
play boys are now pillow boys. Their
foreheads are furrowed and their
spirits are narrowed. From flying
high, they have come back to earth
with disconcerting force.