The midland journal. (Rising Sun, Md.) 1885-1947, 1932-03-18


Bony. II supposed you got drunk
thinkin' o. Cy Doolittle an the
scenery"
"Well, it's all over, an just as soon
tell you boys suthin' If you'll keep 1t a
secret. It's very private"
The boys indicated their respect for
his confidence with unusual emphasis.
Bumpy winked and sat down and
pulled up his right trousers leg to the
knee, exposing most Of his wooden
member. On one side was a little
shelf with hole in it and cork in
the hole.
I'VE see, all I had to do was buy a
bottle O. whisky an fill up my leg with
1t. That OIL leg holds enough to see
snakes with. when I wanted drink
I'd lift my pants leg an stick straw
In the hole an shift part O. the load
a little higher up. call it my happy
New Year leg"
The boys laughed.
"Yes, sir, my OF leg an me is goin'.
to behave"
He took down a fiddle hanging on
the wall and said: Here's the main
shaft o. the fun works"
He tuned it's strings and played
"Money Musk and "The Sailors
Hornpipe." The bird sang joyously
and Bony danced jig as Bumpy
played. He hung up the fiddle and
said to Bony:
''If you'll run down an bring up
that turkey an the butter, I'll start
the doin's."
The boy ran and fetched them.
The bird INDUCED in weird chortle.
Bumpy smiled and said:
swell. Dick, you've never learnt
how to make a fool o. yerself as
have. I've got a maggot in my BRAIN"
Dick whistled a bar of the old bugle
call for assembly.
Bumpy picked up broom, Shout
dered it and marched briskly across
the room as if obeying the call. Re
turning to his task he said:
"We have great times-that bird
an me. We visit together an he
sings purity. When go a-tinkerin' 1
take him with me, carry him on stick
behind me, fastened to my pack. He
amuses the family while work.
Everybody loves him."
Bumpy had a jolly way of bullying
the boys.
go an wash yer hands an comb
yer hair" he said. by Jeedix! Any
body would think that you was settin'
down with common folks to plain
dinner. If any o. my rich friends
should come want We to look right"
Bony had a nervous habit Of wink
ing and wrinkling his brow when
amused. 1851
"Stop screwin' up yer face that
way" Bunny would command, lord
Seems SO the devil had stepped on yer
big toe. 1t makes We look like Mrs.
Smelts." BY.
"Who is Mrs. Smelts?' Bony asked.
"Well, sir, reckon she's the humli-
est woman in the world. Lives in
Pitcairn. She'd wilt We down. Smells
is dead. He must "a died lookin' at
her."
So the time. went until the turkey,
well Drowned, and baked potatoes and
fried fish were on the table all smOk-
ing hot. Then Bumpy brought to the
banquet a pot of delicious coffee and
a Jug of cider with little edge on
it." The feast began.
Bumpy kept the boys laughing with
an account of the singular adventures
of Dick and himself on the road. In
telling these stories he was wont to
use the first person plural. Even
when speaking of his own thoughts
he said 1--WE" as If out of respect for
his comrade. 1t was different when
he told of Pickett's charge at Gettys-
burg and of crawling into clump of
bushes with a bullet in his breast at
Cold Harbor. There was generally
a note of vanity in his stories. Some
of them gave the impression that he
was a man of amazing courage and
fortitude. Then the scarsi
By and by Bony had his turn. He
knew all the droll sayings and mis-
deeds of Amity Dam. While Bumpy
was filling his pipe he turned to Shad
Morryson and said: "Boy, you amt
5 done a thing but laugh an listen.
Slip yer belt on the pulley an keep
the works a-goin'."
It was then that Shad's remarkable
gift for imitation was discovered. He
told a number of the stories Of Phide
Scott, reproducing the droll dialect SO
faithfully that his friends roared with
laughter. They sat talking the hours
away until the sun was low. Sudden
ly Bumpy arose and began to pick up
the dishes, saying: "And there lay
round upon the ground great heaps
of sogers."
Bumpy used this rhymed picture as
a kind of tailpiece to every situation.
There was touch of satirical humor
in it. Doubtless at the lodge and at
other places where old soldiers were
wont to gather he had been fed up
with bloody tales of the great conflict.
tTo BE CoNTINUED.)
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