White Bluffs spokesman. [volume] (White Bluffs, Wash.) 1907-1938, 1932-06-09
he'd disguised that fear as /. superior

wanted to come to him. When 1t
didn't come, he'd get more dignified
and superior than ever.
1t was great to be able to see into
yourself like this!
How about Julia? Was she afraid
of something too? And was she
masking that fear as virtue? She'd
come close to admitting it today. IT
wanted to show I was some good"
she'd said. She'd been doing that for
years.
But his mind ran back beyond the
beginning of it. She'd been q jolly,
fun-loving girl. She was still that
way with the children, with their
friends. 1t had reference to him,
somehow, that misgiving that forced
her into poses Of nobility. Toward
him this attitude had been consistent.
No, not quite! There was one bet
she had overlooked. Why hadn't she
forgiven him, last fall, for the Ingra-
ham affair? Why had she moved him
into the spare room? There had been
chance for the finest sacrifice Of all.
Unless it hadn't been sacrifice. IN
less she'd really wanted him! Was
that it? Was that what she had been
feeling guilty about, all along?
That was wild question; perfectly
academic, anyhow. This was no way
to prepare for the scene he had ahead
Of him.
But he'd like to get it over tonight
if he could. He was feeling good to-
night, clear-headed, confident. To-
morrow morning he might not be quite
so-convincing.
She hadn't gone to bed The lights
were on in the sitting room, and the
click of his latchkey brought her into
the hall Immediately.
"Ned!" she cried with a gasp of re-
lief at sight of him. "Are you all
right?"
EYES," he told her pleasantly. "I'm
all right"
She was gazing at him earnestly
and in an incredulous sort Of way, as
though she found his manner unnat-
ural, suspected it Of concealing some
thing.
Il know you haven't been at the
office. I telephoned there-kept tele-
phoning. 1 wanted to call up Bert
Willard, but I didn't"
'No, haven't been near the Office"
he said, land Bert wouldn't have
known anything about me. I've been
to Jake Germans wedding"
"Why didn't you call me up! Send
word somehow" The fierce intensity
of her manner, rather than the ques-
ton itself, bewildered him.
Il don't know" he said. ct
couldn't say what l wanted to over
the telephone, so I thought I'd wait
until we could talk"
ut didn't occur to you that I'd be-
terrified about you after the way you'd
gone out of the house this noon."
mo-" he said doubtfully.
He knew she was waiting for him
to amplify this denial, but his mind
was simply off the rails. He wanted
to start his real explanation, not waste
time talking about where he'd dined or
why he hadn't telephoned. He saw
now how he ought to have answered
when she asked him where he'd been.
He could have said, "I've been down
the road to Damascus. have seen a
great light" Then, perhaps, she'd have
listened to him.
"you corld have telephoned, couldn't
your she cried. did you think
about me at all?"
He considered the question. "No,"
he told her truthfully, II don't believe
I did. Not till when I got into the
train, things began to get clear. I've
been thinking about you all the time
since then-about both Of us, I mean.
I think I can-well, explain things
now. What's been the matter between
us-all along, more or less"
81 won't listen!" she cried furiously.
II heard enough of your explanations
at lunch. I don't want any more
suppose you think they were all true.
Well, l don't care whether they were
or not. You won't be troubled with
any more Of nay sacrifices. 1 don't
care what you do. You can go away
and stay, if you like. Go and live
with Ruth Ingraham or one Of Jake
Germans chorus girls. oh, stop look
ing at me like that Let me alone!
What are you trying to do?"
He couldn't have named the feeling
that set him in motion toward her
it might have been anger, the sudden
response to challenge. But by the
time he'd come close enough to get
hold of her and pull her up in his
arms, it was pure exultation.
She struggled in good earnest for
minute. but he only held her the
tighter Then, suddenly, she went
limp. She was breathing jerkily in
deep, voiceless sobs.
Heavens" he cried, what a pair
of idiots we've been! Not just for
months For years"
"Have you been an idiot, too?" she