The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1932-12-01


by all. Especially by Archibaldson
for the simple reason that Scoop and
Company got moved out to the Her.
mitage, mansion, Castle by the State
Road, or what have you, where fires
are smoke, hot water is cold, and the
bathtub is too small to sit in. But it's
home, and what's more, it's honey.
And the endurance race is over.
Each workman, with one exception, it
seemed, tried to see how long it would
take to do the work. They all held
out until cold weather and there is
now tie for first place honors.
Because this will be a lesson to
future couples and because it might
awaken some memories in the old
married folks, l will narrate a few
details incident to moving.
1t all started very peaceably on
Wednesday morning of last week.
Lets spend Thanksgiving in our
new home," quoth she, rather suddenly
and with longing in her eyes.
30. k.," quoth he, me or l, just as
enthusiastically, regardless of the Wis
ion of vanishing turkey drumstick
and a photo of the oven of our minia-
ture range.
And so, after hasty grab for food
and clothes Wednesday evening, the
family arrives at said mansion, the
living room of which is papered on
three sides, fireplace in accustomed
position, but minus the mantle.
Water, which had been running for
several days, failed to run. Thoughts
of frozen pipe and decision to get
all water necessary from bottom of
water tank. Carry water for bath,
even if it isn't Saturday night. At
tempt to sit in bathtub and stretch
legs is complete failure, let alone re-
Ginning. Another real pleasure shot.
Next morning water still off. In
vestigation as to cause. Spy exposed
| pipe pOlCLI. bOIlOW ollONCl 1lOIIl
kindly neighbor, with usual promise to
return it in exact position from which
taken, and begin digging. Wife acct
dentally kicks gas pipe in kitchen and
exposed pipe rattles. According to
Sherlock Holmes book on "How to
Become Detective" this meant that
the exposed pipe was the gas line and
not the water line at all. Operations
| suspended.
With Thanksgiving dinner to be
served and no water available, bright
idea suddenly pops into upper story.
Maybe the town turned the water off.
/ The town did. James Compton ar
rives. Inspects water meter and tank.
Meter is hooked up backward which is
entirely satisfactory to me as town
| will owe me at the end of the quar-
| ter. Further inspection reveals that
hot water spiggots are cold and cold
water spiggots are hot. The only
thing left was to hook the gas meter
| to the water and have hot or cold
water right in our own stove, at no
extra cost. RUDE Goldberg, with his
| famous inventions of Lucifer G. Butts
would get several new ideas from the
plumbing out there.
But Thanksgiving is Thanksgiving,
and we were thankful we had water.
Then the window shades had to go up
because it would not be right and
proper to parade in the front bedroom
with lights on, and so near the State
road, too. All were put up twice.
How was l to know that they turned
under instead of over? 1 was blind
to the fact.
The best of everything, though, is
that we like it. If you don't believe
it, come out and see for yourself. And
don't judge the book by its cover.
All my worries now are Bens. At
O.4o d. Ill. IL is LltCle Dell. Az elSnI
o'clock, when l arrive at the office,
it is Big Ben, and Big Ben from then
on until 500 o'clock or far on into the
night.
Two tales going around town ought
to be investigated. One is that per-
son in the Hutton community who has
as much of the do-re-mi as anybody
else in this section is getting his share
of Red Cross flour when it is distrib-
uted to the needy.
Another is that an Oakland man
got some flour to distribute to the
needy in the Sang Run community
and then when it was delivered it was
sold to some farmers thereabouts.
It's that kind of humanity that goes
anoipct Tho orroip