The Waterbury Democrat. [volume] (Waterbury, Conn.) 1917-1946, 1932-02-23
Good evening.
o-O-O
A BIT OF FUN
"a SMILES THE THING.

A BIT OF FUN
If YOU are in the mood to smils
Along LIES mundane way,
Just glimpse the chatter down
below,
Our effort for today,
For even in the thick of war,
You'll find a thing in style,
And now you've guessed the
simple facts,
It's just a grand old smile
o-O-o
The Chinese may be putting
up u stout resistance against
Japan, but the Japs are win
ming the pictorial battle.
They're ahead now by 1,619
pictures and seven movies.
o-O--o
Both armies took a day off
to-day. SO neither had d
Chinaman's chance to do very
much.
o-O-o
Russia Is mobilizing her
100000 standing army. SO If
Russia starts the tive-year
plan against Japans Chinese
plan we're going to have a
cross word puzzle TO worry
about.
The laps burned the Chin
csc railroad station. | sup
pose they got sore because
they couldn't read the time
table.
Either that or a Jap soldier
put cent in one of those
gum slot machines in the sta
ton and nothing came out.
O-O-o
But it's been great war.
They fight three times week
with special matinee on Sat-
urday.
O-O-o
Some great stories are COM
ing from the war zone but they
can't touch the Chinese pig
tails.
The Japs thought they'd just
walk through China. But now
the Chinks appear to be TAX
ing them for a ride.
O-O-O
When the Chinese first start
ed to fight they carried UNI
brellas. But so many were
shot away that the war depart
ment ordered them abandoned
to save overhead expense.
o-O-o
There's no more unemploy-
ment in China. Before the
war the Chinks were fighting
to get job. Now they've
been given jobs fighting.
o-O-o
The Japanese should have
realized they'd be collared once
they went into the land of the
laundries. :.
The Chinks in New Haven
are so excited that they've de-
cided not to play the Japanese
wheels at Savin Rock next
summer.
Japan says she's only started
and eventually will bring
China to her Chi-knees.
o-O-o
To this the Chinese answer,
"Well bring the enemy to his
Japan-knees."
Not to mention chop suey.
O-O-O
The first car struck by a
japanese shell was a Ford.
Firing on women, eh, hit
Lizzie.
The second car hit was
trolley. Well. that's better.
O--O--o
The Japanese tanks are said
to be doing good work, which
will be cheering news to the
vets.
600
They claim boycott started
the fight. You'll generally find
boy or girl responsible for
almost everything.
O-O-O
The Japs have ordered 3d.
900 more men into the fray.
More hcathens for the mission
aries in China to christianiZe.
o-O-o
The japanese soldier gets
five cents day for. fighting. If
he doesn't fight he doesn't
even get that.
All the Chinese get is a bowl
of rice. We Americans, in
stead of fighting for a bowl'of
rice, fight against 1t.
o-O-o
The Chinese girls are be-
coming nurses to care for the
wounded. And perhaps some
of the wounded will learn to
care for them.
o-O-o
There Is no fighting at night,
except a few shells now and
then. The soldiers belong to
the union and fight only eight
hours. After that they want
time and a half with Saturday
afternoons off.
600
The japanese shells are fall
ing on the bamboo houses of
the Chinese but don't make
light of 1t, please.
o--O--O
The names of the Chinese
generals are big enough to be
used as Notifications.
o-O-o
Japan of course denies she
is the aggressor. But the
Chinese don't know what the
word means.
600
The war is being fought on
the level. There's not a hill
around Shanghai.
o-O--o
The Chinese are using plas-
ter Paris gods to protect them
but the Japs are bound to plas-
ter them sooner or later.
o-O--o
The Jap soldiers are shorter
than the Chinese but they'll
probably fight longer.
O-O-O
Radio announcers are ex-