The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1931-11-20
WAN NERS
%MORALS
RN0ANE JORDAN

RRING your emotional problems
~ to Jane Jordan, who viii help
you to find a solution. Address your
letters to The Times and they will
be answered in this column as soon
as possible. If you want a personal
answer, send stamps.
Dear Jane Jordan-WiI YOU please
write something about how to avoid family
uuarrelsP I think my husband is very I'M
reasonable with our two daughters, though
one Of them nearly always can get around
him some way or other. I am sick of try
ing to keep peace in the family. Can you
tell me how to do it?
PEACEMAKER
Dear Peacemaker-The most diff
cult art in the world is the art of
living together. Group life without
conflicts is impossible, but a
thorough knowledge of human ma
ture helps to reduce the number of
conflicts, and assists in their solu-
ton.
If you wish to control behavior of
your family, go about getting this
result in an intelligent, scientific
manner. Remember that you never
can get what you want by antago-
nizing people, or by engaging in a
free-for-all family quarrel.
Nearly every family has its pet,
from whom the rest of the family
profitably could take lessons. Have
xfnt 114O
wrap her father around her finger,
no matter what his reputation for
unreasonableness with the rest of
the family? "She knows how to
work him." you say Well, why don't
you watch how she does it?
Unconsciously or not, she uses
sound psychology in her methods.
Father, dearest, you are so per-
fectly wonderful to me. You always
have given me everything I want.
Please may have six girls to lunch
con at the club?"
Analyze the effect of her state
ment on father. First, she has made
him feel superior. She contraSted
her frail femininity with his strong
masculinity. She emphasized her
dependence on him. She appealed
to his protective sense, which is one
of the strongest factors in the
masculine makeup. She inflated his
ego, and made him feel a sense of
power.
All this she accomplished with one
swift, sure stroke and while he was
enjoying the glow of this pleasant
mood, she cleverly tucked in her re-
quest, The result is that father is
far more helpless in her hands than
if she had hit him on the head with
a bludgeon.
So you have a little psychologist
in your family? 1t will pay the
rest of the family to understudy her.
Dear Jane Jordan-We are three young
high school girls, who want to hear what
you have to say about necking We find
we are not popular with the boys unless
We do a certain amount OF it. Our par
ents think necking is terrible.
BIG THREE.
Dear Girls-Shall I let him kiss
me? This is a question which puz-
zles dozens of young girls who, while
they have no desire to indulge in
promiscuous petting, still do not
wish to make themselves unpopular
by a too rigid standard of conduct.
Few people in this modern day
believe that a girl is abandoned just
because she has been kissed few
times. A kiss may mean everything
or nothing, according to the variety.
There is the flavorlesS peck of
duty exchanged between husbands
and wives. Then there is the kiss
of friendship, which, however, I'M
sanitary it may be. certainly is
harmless from a moral point of
view.
The lovers kiss is the one under
consideration, and for very good
reasons it does not belong to the
adolescent period of life. At this
age the young are mentally imma-
ture and unprepared to cope with
mature emotions. It is better. then,
to avoid that which tends to Stimu-
late such emotions.
Every period in life has its pleas
ures. It is a grave mistake for
youth to hasten into situations
which require the adult viewpoint
for intelligent handling.
In mathematics we do not try to
learn the back part of the arithme-
tic first, but solve each problem ac-
cording to its place in the book.
Life is much easier to live if we
learn the simple lessons first, and
do not attempt to solve its more
complicated propositions before we
have been prepared for them by
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