The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1931-12-10

EZA~Z--------
NTRITE your emotional prob
w lens to Jane Jordan who will
answer your letters in this column.
Write fully and freely, just as if
you were talking to friend. If you
have any secrets to tell they will
be kept in strictest confidence.
"XZOUNGEST DAUGHTER" who
4 has written me twice, is
brave little soul who lives with al
cantankerous father whom she sup
ports Five sisters married the first
men who asked them to escape from
their father, and none of them are
happy. Her father mas had one
stroke and lives in fear Of another.
At first her father expected her
to go to bed every night at 8 o'clock,
and threw tantrums when she dis
obeyed, even threatening to strike
her. Through careful management
he now doesn't say so much if
she goes out some over the week.
end, but if she takes an evening
during the weel he gets mad and
stays mad for sew
eral days The 11,1
daughter has " ~" ~
boy friend who " O ~ e
doesn't UNDER D
stand why he ~ q" Is
cont conoe on
Tuesday night, too and fears she
is saving that night for some other
boy
This case brings up the question
of how much children owe their
parents. Not so much as parents
owe their children. in my opinion
The burden of duty flows from the
{ parents to the child for the parents
are responsible for the child's pres
ence in struggling universe.
Few of us have found existence
a priceless boon for which we owe
undying gratitude tC the persons
who bestowed it upon us. On the
contrary, We have come to wonder
what it is all about and to ponder
the meaning OF OH. presence in a
world which seems bent upon max
ing US suffer.
However, when parents have felt
their obligations keenly and sacri-
/ feed The best years of their lives
for their children; when they have
been kind, generous. and unselfish,
only the worst sort of an migrate
would refuse that comfort which the
old age of the parents undoubtedly
merits.
Often the preparation of the child
for life takes what the parent other
wise would have laid aside for his
own support. The right kind of
parents burn with ar undying zeal
TO equip the child for life better
than they themselves were equipped.
When old age descends, those par
ents should be cherished by the
child whom they labored so hard to
launch.
Once upon time We were taught
1t was our duty to love our parents
merely because they gave us life.
Now we realize
Do,,,+ V;o1J that parents are
~" L 'o'1 people and not
Too Much gods; that We love
D,4,, them becaus e
= " y they are lovable
and if they are
not we react against them ex-
actly as if there was no blood tie.
In the case of a father as IN
pleasant as yours is, I would not
feel my duty too keenly. I would
expect my married sisters to
help me by taking him into their
homes for occasional visits. there
by giving me a rest from his con-
tinual surveillance and bosSing.
l would be kind to him, but firm
If you want me to stay here and
earn your living, 1 must have my
evenings in which to do as I please. y
If you are calm, but determined
what can he do but concede your
point
You have all the winning cards in
your hands. if you only knew it
because he is dependent on you
for survival. He is a bully, and all
DULLES are towards at heart. He is
old and sick and will not risk liv-
ing alone without your aid.
No one ever filings tantrum alone
! As soon as the audience is removed
the tantrum stops. Never watch
him in a temper, but leave the house
for a few hours. Refuse to live
where you are not we'll treated YOU
don't realize that losing his temper
is probably the only pleasure that
the old man has.
l think you should take the boy
friend into your confidence. If you
got your way about dates for the
weekend you can have Tuesday
too, if only you can overcome your
habit of fear toward your father.
How would it be to have the boy
friend call on Tuesday and pay nc
attention to your fathers tantrums;
If he gets violent, walk out on him
Please write me again whenever
you feel like it, as you are one o.
the girls am most interested in.