Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1931-05-07
THIS AND THAT
BY CHARLES Z. TRAcEWELL.

Many are truth-tellers, but few
| truth-takerS.
We had rather be let down easily
than told the truth, II bitter, In all its
bitterness.
The lucky man is he who has the
born ability to tell others what they do
| not want to hear In such q fashion
that neither offense nor danger is
caused.
The best way for the average person
to achieve this highly desirable effect
is to refrain from too complete expla-
nations, Every word you say gives the
other q chance for difference OF opin-
ion, and every difference gives loop
hole for anger.
And anger, once it is aroused, jusu-
fes the man Of his works.
The better way Is to say mo-" II no
it must be, and to smile blandly, as II
there were no question in the world
but that the question were settled now
and forever.
The danger point Is exactly here.
II he seems to be willing to accept the
verdict, you will likely begin to feel
sorry for him, and, II you do, you Will
think some details Of explanation due
him.
The details are exactly what he
wishes, and once you give them to him
he will, in all likelihood, especially II
he possesses the legal mind, which de-
lights in logical twistings and winnings.
proceed either to become suspicious or
angry.
wisdom justifes herself Of her chill
dren, 1t Is said. SO does anger, and
there is no telling, once ire Is aroused,
how much Justification 1t will demand,
all Of 1t unfairly.
y
Perhaps the best method is that prac-
ticed by q truly clever gentleman VINO
possesses both tact and brains. They
do not necessarily 60 together, but
sometimes they do.
This man has q suaWty In public
relations which is at once the Joy and
envy Of all who are privileged TO watch
him in action.
Surely he practices deceit, to some
extent, but 1t Is never malicious and Is
utilized solely to save the user from the
effects of anger and the other from
himself.
This astute handler Of human beings
Is able to take a very angry man, upon
entry. and transform him within few
minutes into a calm individual. who
ends by apologizing for his anger and
goes out apologizing for himself.
Now this ability is gift, but It can
DC lcdInGo, W SOhIlC CAbGib nv AOooOs
Perhaps most Of US know the essen
tialS already.
In human relations most men are
unable to carry their intentions into
effect. In refusing another something
which he asks, their very desire to be
fair often leads to their undoing. Let
them smile. maybe they say, II will
give this every consideration and let you
know later" This line of conduct
sends the other away smiling, too.
He is pleased because he is not told
too much. But IL you sit Town with
him, brother to brother, and try to
tell him why you reject the thing, and
how 1t could be improved, and how you
feel sure he can do better, he begins
to wonder II you know your business,
after all.
He is partly right. II you knew your
business best for yourself, you would
never for an instant give him any
material for doubt. Hence the justi-
fication for much Of the hocus- pocus
Of business ofices, with the never
ending refrain, Mr.. Jones is in con-
ference" Mr.. Jones Is q wise baby who
has learned just 3 little about handling
men,