The Daily Alaska empire., 1931-08-08
Porch Climbers.

1881 by Lawrence H. Conrad Professor in the State
 Teachers College at Montclair, New Jersey)
 During the present century America has reversed it's attitude toward the front door For fathers
 and mothers a knock ring welcome
 sound to be answered with alacrity, with courtesy
 with that famous thing called hospitality. With us
 the door is answered suspiciously, and only after pause during which we harden hearts and sum- mon all natere cunning When fathers an swered the door they found guests we find, in more instances than not merely another porch-climber. i Whether it is a young man working his way through college or old man sending his daughter to finishing school just ordinary sort of man bringing you the compliments of brush or Lni- ment company you may be that his appearance at your door is no casual occurrence Your visitor has studied your habits: he has rehearsed his speech; he has practiced hard and long at meeting all your objections. Smart men behind him. supplying him with arguments, with openings, with advantages you He stands there smiling, but he is doing cold -blooded thing.
 You supposed to be glad to see the porch climber on your premises He is apparently all courtesy. Here I am" he says, with incaluable brass back again to serve you further. Now this time want you to buy such and so' The has come down long street, stopping at every house He is still alive. You do not want to be than your neighbors You do not want to make scene So, though you thoroughly exasperated, you treat him fairly you would treat any guest Well, he has counted upon this. He has esti- mated the strength of your courtesy He has cal cuated your devotion to your home, your fear of your neighbors, your natural desire to be just and kind And he plays his whole game just inside your boundaries. He has ten times the hold upon you that you possibly have upon him. Standing out side he be utterly nsncere down to the soles of his shoes Standing your own threshold, with your home behind you you can never be- and well he knows it.
 Porch climbers prey primarily upon women. In most instances they ignore the of the house, aDnOintment wife. The wife, presumably, is less adept at turn ing down opportunities" When she comes to the door, they hail her by name Her response is inn rmediately courtesy and hospitality. Having greeted her visitor with the assumption that he is her hus- bands cousin she cannot moment later, change her voice and call him viper. And so if he needs to, he proceed to be Though her baby may be in the bath; though her cake may be burning though her whole household may be at that moment in crisis she must stand and hear this story to the end. Far from caring about her affairs, the salesman is quick to detect her concern and to place his proposition in such light that she had best buy and get it over
 Both husbands and wives have studied ways of meeting this daily annoyance You could refuse tol answer the bell But it might be messenger with a telegram. You could go to the door jerk it open and cry out that you do not want anything. But it might be Uncle Ben running in for chat You could put up a sign farmers post their premises against hunters. But you would never do that No; you will continue to answer the bell. And each time you do, you will find the whole duel of wits to be gone through again, with the man outside steadily winning And at each ring of the bell you will shudder, sigh and drag yourself to the door If the ring comes from legitimate guest you will be immediately chagrined at the suspicion you showed in opening to him.
 The thing basicaly wrong with the whole porch elimng racket is that it makes place of business out of the American home. Thus it assaults the home it's weakest side For by every rule by
 
 it stands the home strives to be what place of business it not. The home is almost exactly the op- posite of business office
 Our company" the young on the porch says proudly "does not sell through the stores and does not have store anywhere So he proposes to make a store of your threshold. He gives you choice of business hours, choice of goods to be handled in this store; and he calls only when you are away at your own business office for which you pay handsome rental. Yet one company boasts millions of doorsteps that it does not rent store. And householder to my knowledge has had the discourtesy to make the obvious retort
 The second assumption upon which the racket proceeds is that will be deliberately impolite upon his own threshold.
 man of my acquaintance kept a tin egg beater just inside his door When an agent came this friend stopped him in the middle of his first breath flashed the egg beater, and started his own selling spiel. Just moment" he would say, T have very fine article here that l want you to buy It is of the most ingenious contraptions that civilized has devised. You just turn this crank. D The agent always insulted as the assumption that he could possibly use an egg bsater and furious at having his valuable time wasted such trivial matter. Yet my friend had more than a hundred times as much right to sell goods at that spot did the stranger who climbed his porch. If the American home is to be made into a place of business, the householder should be able to say what kind of business, and should be able to derive the profit After alL he owns the property
 Some of us slam the door these commercial visitors But that is hard to do And no stranger has any right to make take violent attitude toward our front door The front door must reflect the home within. If we lose courtesy and hospital ity we may as well take to the woods again. Yet if pracice courtesy in the face of this invasion the invading force will use every vile and every