Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1931-11-01

ago Pat Hurley, Secretary of
war in these Peace times in Mr.. Hoovers Cab
met well Pat had been away over in the
Philippines. Rumors had reached the Presi-
dent that the Little Brown Brothers" was just
about ready to leave our Bed and Board and
take up citizenship elsewhere. They had heard
of the advantages of Independence, but evil
IDENTIFY very little of its drawbacks. So. Mr..
Hoover looked over his eight or nine hired men
in the Cabinet and he choose Pat. He knew
that Pat was q man that no matter what argue
ment the little Brunette Brothers" put up why
Pat would have an answer to EN-. So he says
20 Pat:
pat along with s76 other difficulties I am
having, why the Philippines are perspiring to
Independence. viii you go over there and see
II its Bolshevih propaganda, or just Demo-
cratic influence. You know its hard to tell
nowadays which causes me the most devilment,
the Russians or the Democrats. Now, 60 on
over there. You got nothing to do. We
haven't got q war booked at this time. don't
know whats the matter with Simpson, he Is
backward but got him working on this jap
China thing, and If everything turns out all
right why we ought to have a real job for
Secretary of war before long. But you haven't
much on your mind. Your Oil is such q good
price, and Oklahoma under Bill Murray is sail
ing along fine, so you haven't got q thing to
worry about.
Now listen here is some instructions. If
they really want their Independence, why
EN- would be to give it to en-. But don't do it
too quick. for that would make EN- think maby
we dident want EN-, and they are very sensi-
tive people You know every people you deal
with are always sensitive, so you musept hurt
their feelings. In Diplomacy. the way they
work 1t they always are careful to not hurt
anybodyS feelings but their own people, but
you go over there and kinder nose around, and
see whats eating our InSular Possession.
Bring me back a report, for one more report
added 70 the 623 that arrive back to me daily
from my Commissions, wont be much more,
but you can give me yours verbally. Don't come
dragging in here with it like WickerSham, in a
Truck. like you, Pat. and you are kinder my
Head Man. so II ~ cant give EN- their free
dom, why at least refuse in such way that YOU
arrive back here with the report. Kinder look
China and Japan over while you are there, and
see II you can find out who's batting that trap
every morning.
zone of our Senators from Missouri has been
In the Philippines this Summer and set EN-
free, so you 60 explain to EN- just what
Senator Is and get EN- all laughing again. Elk
plain to EN- that when Senator sets you free,
that its kind Of q Near Beer Freedom, and
they don't want to expect too much results
from it, Explain that We have 80 Of these that
30 out every Summer, freeing somebody, and
We have yet to find one of their cures that was
permanent. Now don't stop in Utah on your
way out and let Reed Smoot get ahold OF you.
You must remember that Utah raises sugar
beetS, and the Philippines raises sugar cane,
and both Of EN- make sugar. Wen you just
wave Philippine sugar cane at Smoot and you
got what might be known in the classics IS
hostile Senator On your hands Hen trade