Brownsville herald. [volume] (Brownsville, Tex.) 1910-current, 1931-06-07
The Once Over
THE AMERICAN MAYOR ABROAD
BY ii. /. PHILLIPS

Nancy.-A great sensation was caused In official
circles here today. Civic officers are stunned. You
could knock the populace over with a feather. The
delegation Of visiting American mayors passed through
without insulting anybody.
Dijon-A way to avoid an embarrassing scene AZ
the municipal banquet to American mayors was
iouno here today. What TO do with Mayor John G.
Porter Of Los Angeles and wife. who have walked out
on dinners at which wine was served. had been a
problem 1t was solved by putting Mayor Porter in a
Theoretically sealed room with twenty American flags.
SIX monographs playing. I'm A Yankee Doodle DAN
dy." and q punchbowl filled with crackers and milk
On account Of the dim lights the mayor did not dis
cover there were no reporters present until too late
to do anything about 1t.
Amiens-To save his feelings, Mayor John G.. Por-
ter was blindfolded while the delegation OF Ameri-
can mayors passed a wine vineyard today. "Im a one
hundred per cent. American and as such I am not
supposed to know there are such things as grapes"
said a statement issued by the mayor later. Three
cheers for the Red, White and Bluel I come from
the land OF the free and the home OF the brave. Wine
is a serpent. The stars and tripes foreverl Make mine
VANILLA"
Orleans--The official dinner rendered the mayors
from the United States was not exactly a success here
tonight. When a toast was proposed to Joan OF Arc,
the California executives refused to participate un-
less one was first drank to Mrs. Aimee Semple Mac
Pherson and her mother.
Paris-At a banquet given to the American mayors
here Yesterday the mayor Of an eastern city, who re-
fused to give his name until he found out where he
was, leaped to his feet and made a rousng II some-
what incoherent speech in which he said civilization
was saved In the late war by the American people.
France v-as too late getting into the struggle 70
help much, he declared. For a long time We thought
she would never join usl' He then slipped slowly
under the table with a bottle IN each hand.
Two mayors OF western cities fell out OF a box
at the Folies Bergere tonight. They refused to 20
back until they had received Official verification Of
the fact they had fallen out. This may take several
days.
versaires-An American mayor. who gave a fictiti-
tious name. was caught carving his initials with n
jackknife in the BODY Of Na-oleon's coach during the
visit to a museum here. Just as this unpleasant IN
cident had been ironed out the police were called 70
drag from the Versailles pool four American mayors
who had walked directly into II. thinking II was
Just an optical Illusion.
The longer the American mayors remain here the
more the French people think that mavhe Mayor
Porter Of Los Angeles is rrht about prohibition.
MUssoLINI DIARY
Monday: Toscanini
Put in Jail, ! hope.
Tuesday: Felt quite meany-
Had a row with Pope:
Wednesday: Shot a foeman;
Thursday: Jailed a red"
Friday: Hit Church Roman);
Saturday: To bed.
Ina Dodo has always been under the impression
the Grlf pefininr rornarv was some sort az finish
ing school.
Texas Guinan and her "gang.' barred from Lon
don. will not be allowed to visit Paris. Give this little
girl a foot!
William c"Red'O Fill has shot the Niagara Falls
rapids in a barrel. The old boy Is evidently out for
permanent immersion.
By being dismissed from the Rumanian court
Queen Helen loses her low auto number, we suppose
Copyright. 1881, by The Associated Newspapers