The Northwest enterprise. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1931-1952, 1931-03-12
"The Fall OF a
Fair Confederate
lContinned from Pace IL

was to make some queenly gesture
of disapproval, but | recalled the
street car incident and how | had
survived that and hesitated, secretly
fearing | should be making a spec
tacle of myself. Moreover, was ex-
tremely curious as to what the young
man would do and how he would re-
cite. | soon found that he did quite
well and recited brilliantly. | was
greatly astonished and a little re-
lieved, too. for | had thought that it
was going to be very painful watch
ing a poor primitive mind struggle
with Shapespeare and Goeth. But
it seemed no strain upon the Young
man at all, which, of course. did not
fit IN with my traditional beliefs. and
another layer of prejudice began to
crumble. | never met the young man,
but the mischief was done.
Finds Negroes Not Mental Interiors
Negroes We're no longer the men,
tai interiors of whites. However,
this did not necessarily mean that
| now thought them my equals. but
simply that some Negroes were as in
telligent as some whites. OF course
that did not include myself. had
a very exalted opinion of my superb
GRITTY, and my interiors consisted of
practically the whole human race,
white, black, brown. red and yellow.
An idea bred by the social position
| had occupied in the Cotton and
Cattle Belt, where there is little or
no middle Class, socially speaking,
n1,kr i
class poor white everyone but Il
handful at the top) is almost as low
ly as Negro.
Becomes n Red
So | had much to learn. This was
1920 wnen California was flaming
with Red activities. Restless,
morbid and curious like most Of my
generations went to look on at the
Reds and soon, |, too, caught fire
| became enthusiastic about equality
in ali forms. | conceived the notion
and it may be true, that my dissat-
isfaction with life, and that of all
wealthy people | knew, was due to
our economic system which put a
premium on profit and justified any
thing that was successful and de-
SPiSSu VI Nonutllntu dfYbHlHB llldl
was not. decided that if this sys-
TEN did not make even the success
full happy it must be pretty bad and
in need of renovation. began to
lose my feeling of exalted aloofness
and to think of myself as just an
other human being caught in the
tolls of a system that destroyed rich
and poor alike.
Seeks to Make Redress
But since had seemingly profited
in many ways by oppression Il was
not undernourished or overworked,
though probably was overnourished
and underworked). it was up to me
to make redress. marched in Red
parades, sang the "Internationale.
gave away my allowance to de
Tense" funds and. of course, read
the Liberator. And in the Liber-
ator one month saw the Crisis adj
vertised. I had not known before
that there was a Negro Press.) Full
of curisoity about the magazine. |
subscribed for it. was agreeably
surprised to note that it was in good
English. This was at the height of
the postwar lynching epidemic, and
these gruesome activities were all
duly and realistically recounted in
the Crisis. Many of them occurred
in my home state, in communities
which | knew well. and my reaction
upon reading about them was one of
shame and guilt. The worst that the
Crisis could say about Southern
mobs | knew from personal expert
b. l. 4 A. 4
when | had sympathized with this
savage sport of "nigger hunting"
Remorse Affects Her Dreams
This barbarism was no new thing
sprung from war hysteria. and my
race and my clan had for three cen
turtles been engaged in expressing
and scourging the darker folk. This
thought so disturbed me that almost
every night for months had a night
mare about it. These took the form
of symbolism-white chickens peck
ing black ones to death; large dogs
devouring small ones; buffaloes torn
and stamped by cattle, and in each
case I felt all of the horror and
dread of the victim. | suppose this
was some kind of inner chastise-
ment.
Has a Pleasant Dream Experience
Then, one night, | had very diff
ferent sort of dream. In this ore
Linky introduced me to a strange
Negro youth and we began to dance
together. | felt an ndescribabe
happiness and something seemed to
say to me that now that we we're
dancing together there would be no
more suffering and msunderstand-
ing in the world. The dream must
have been a form of psychical eli
max, for thereafter | had no more
nightmares. As | kept a dairy, it
was easy for me to perceive the
course my dreams had taken How
ever, | continued to dream about the