davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Waterbury Democrat., 1931-04-01
Uncle Rays
 Corner
TWO "ApRIL FooE' STORIES

TWO "APRIL FOOE' STORIES
 A story is told about an April Fools day, long ago in France. The Duke of Lorraine. 'tis said, was held prisoner in the walled city of Nantes. His wife was also a prisoner.
 Early in the morning, the duke and the duchess disguised them- selves and started toward the city gates. The duke carried brick1ay- er's bod, and his wife carried a bas- ket of rubbish. Thinking they were poor folk, the gate-keeper let them pass. A woman who knew the duke passed them on the road, and ran to tell the gate-keeper, but he laughed and said: This is April Fools Day" The prisoners made good their escape.
The Waterbury Democrat., 1931-04-01

still are--any number of radio fig ures who interpret the news of the day or use their newspaper and magazine experiences as a back ground for current events.
 There is, at the moment, consid- erable headscratchings in Q dozen different offices es various confer ences try to decide just how far 1t will be possible to go in the drama tization of real events. talkie houses and listen in over the radio. watching for famous voice that lends itself to parody and cari- cature.
 GILBERT SWAN
The Waterbury Democrat., 1931-04-01

Spring Fred Chase is back from his trip the Bill Harris has been looking old friends Washington D. Jess Kelsey answering phone calls again after trip where the begins Bill Manning health hunting Knoxville, Dick Fisher looking into the city charter racket behalf local Kiwanns Clarence Can brilliant sports scrivene the this week The Hearst Weekly purng Londos wrestling match shows Cass the box hard by the ring Ant that sumpin Chef Frank Naka break derby for the Easter parade Nope it's brown
 Mir and Mrs Ids Anderson bathing sung in Florida
The Waterbury Democrat., 1931-04-01

Here and there Paroman Tim Hurley. Sergeant Fla hy and Lieutenant Mulvl duty the county building yesterday curious running amuek Hurley outside the building Fahy front door and Mu vile the second landing Mrs Johnny Moore taking residence in Chicago where husband Watervs prize boy listed with the Cubs Seen the fight in New Haven: Shakey ORouke George Reyes Mickey Dance Chick Lawson Jack Frene Chick Kelly Charley Popik Mert Connor Jackie Savers Orv Lawlor. Senator Joe Lawlor George Mulgan Ed Cuy Atty Ralph Coppeto Phil coppeto and Danny Della Bella.
The Waterbury Democrat., 1931-04-01

New York.--The voices of kings, statesmen and other dignitaries, sent out over the air circuits recently by Times newsree1 broadcast, are those of half dozen actors who spend many hours weekly trying to achieve an authentic duplication of the original.
 In several instances the similar tiles have had the uncanny life-like
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1931-10-03

with the tying runs and, after williams
had struck out, to make Connie Mack
send Jim Moore to bat in place of
Earnshaw.
Two out and two on bases And then
Hallahan rose to the occasion by strik-
ing out Moore. and every one. including
the Cardinal players. rushed of the
field thinking the game was over. Moore
started walking to the dugout, but
Coach Eddie Collins screamed for him
to run to first base. Wilson, the Car
dinals catcher, threw the ball to third
to head off Foxx going into that bag
instead of throwing to FIRST. Amid wild
confusion it developed that Wilson had
giving Moore the right to FIRST base if
he could get there ahead Of the throw.
Thus the situation was suddenly
changed-three Athletics on bases and
Two out. Haliahan, however, cooi as q
cucumber. was not to be cheated OF his
victory by such a mishap, and the next
batter. Bishop, popped a foul near first
base which Jim Bottomley shared In a
spectacular catch leaning over a field
box
Anything might have followed wilson's
stupid play. and he would have been
sad player indeed II his error had cost
his team a hard-won victory. Flowers,
the third baseman, thinking that the
game was won, might easily have tossed
the ball as q souvenir into the st. Louis
dugcut, thus allowing three Philadelphia
runs to score and putting them one up
for the contest. Bishop, given a chance
for fame, might have hit enc on the
nose, a home run, triple or double.
scoring four runs in the first case and
three in the other two. Hallahan might
have become so upset by the trend OF
events as to lose control altogether,
passing Bishop. forcing in one run and
giving the hea?y hitting Haas, cochrane
and Simmons a chance to break up the
game.
Anything might have happened, but
what did happen was TO the great credit
of the Cardinal pitcher. He came
through under the most distressing cir
cumstances with colors flying, and prob
ably he kept Jim wilson's name from
the tablets of "boners" in history with
Merkle, Zimmerman and others whose
freakish misplays will never be forgotten
as long as mans memory runs.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1931-10-03
Another Cleanup" for Chicago

Chicago is going to have world
fair" in 1888. 1t wants to entertain
great crowds of people. Realizing that
the city has suffered seriously in re-
pute of late because of the prevalence
of crime there, its civic leaders are
anxious lest people may hesitate about
visiting such a danger spot. SO they
are moving to clean house and give
the town a Better name before the
country. Mayor Anton Cermak, who was
elected mayor last Spring over big
Bill Thompson, has been endeavoring to
set matters in order, and now, to carry
on further, he has named a new police
chief, charged with the duty of max
ing Chicago, if not lily white, at least
as pure in reputation for law and or
der as the average American center
He styles the new head of the force
of guardians his world fair police
commissioner" The new leader Of the
force is Capt. James P. Altman, who
has won the name of Iron man" of
the Police Department.
Quite recently there has been q re-
vtval Of bombing and other forms Of
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1931-10-03

racketeering activity in Chicago, and
civic organizations have demanded a
suppression OF this terrorism. Commits
sioner Altman, taking his newly desig-
mated post, said frankly: II am rot
tickled to death with this job" But
he added that he was ready to go after
the violators OF the law to the best of
his ability. He said nothing of the
courts of the city. Yet he knows that
heretofore the most sincere efforts of
the police to suppress vice and crime
have been rendered fruitless by the fail
ure Of the judges to cooperate.
Whether a better condition prevails in
the higher up ranges Of the law en-
forcement organization remains to be
seen. Best wishes are to be extended
to the new police commissioner, and
hearty sympathy goes to him also for
facing hard task.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1931-10-03

Fine moonlight nights recently made
the study Of shadows peculiarly inter-
esting.
Why should one study shadows?
Because shadows are manifestations
Of light, and light is the all-in-all of
human life
Whether one considers light in a
physical or mental way. with or with
out benefit Of clergy, he gets back at
last to the words in the beginning, Let
there be light"
And without shadows it would be
difficult, sometimes, to tell whether
there was any light.
Shadows may be said to be reflections
OF light, too.
1t is so in the moral sense
Maybe sin is essential to show
righteousness in all its warmth and
beauty.
Shadows of the ordinary kind may
be divided into two groups, the outdoor
and the indoor.
There are six main classes Of outdoor
shadows. as compared with four OF the
indoor sorts.
In the main. outdoor shadows are
caused by the sun. moon, street lights
automobiles. floodlights and fires.
Those indoors are made by sun, moon
lights and flreplaces.
Trees are the casters Of the most in
teresting outdoor shadows, chiefly owing
to their quality of movement under
pressure by the wind. 1.
Sunlit shadows are inclined. in gen.
eral, to be a bit harsh, perhaps too
sharply DEFINED, as patterns are cast
Vet thew are cool and conofortahle-
looking, especially on q hot Summer
day.
1t remains for a moonlight night.
however, to furnish the world with its
prime, A No. / shadows.
y + =
When the moon Is high in the sky,
| and clouds are nowhere TO be seen,
then come the shadows which intrigue
the mind OF man.
Let it be admitted at once that you
have to have the type OF mind which is
one has, but 1t is much more common
than some are inclined to think.
There is a class of human beings, the
members Of which become so much
| wrapped up in themselves as human
beings and in their strictly human
affairs that they never find time for a
consideration Of the things Of Nature.
OuCn InlnBS as WulQ ana 1rOSC ana
sun and moon and rain they regard as
| strictly non-human, and therefore not
| so interesting as complexities of thought
| and conduct created by the interplay
OF human forces.
As human beings, these people
| shortly work up o superiority complex,
and choose to regard persons of another
| type Of mind as rather simple in char
acter. These latter are all those who
| profess to find in natural things
seasons, sun, moon, frost, rain, etc-a
great deal OF interesting phenomena
for human beings to watch
To them a sunset is often as inter-
| esting as the latest move in politics.
The grand strategy of nations some
times looks cheap to them, in COMPARE
son with the fall of Autumn leaves.
Recent intense moonlight filtered
| through locust and oak trees, throwing
| alternate patches of light and shadow
! on the ground.
Grass. always interesting, In its
changes from week to week. and even
day to day. took or under 5the moon
light a mellow perfection which left
no suggestion of bare spots, or places
where ants had turned up red clay, to
show through the green blades in the
| daytime.
| Here, under the alchemy of moon
shine, was lawn perfection at last
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1931-10-03
A Necessary Investigation.

The rcumStanceS attending the
forced resignation of DR.. Ray M. Hall,
an economist of the Bureau of Finance
and Investment of the Department Of
Commerce, attracted wide attention and
considerable comment at the time be-
cause they seemed to involve an i'm
portant element Of public policy. There
was a dispute between DR.. Hall and his
superior as to the inclusion Of certain
figures and comment in q report, DR..
Hall taking the view that a change in
his report was suppression" to hide
vital, If unpleasant. truths, and the
Department Of Commerce officialS con-
tending, generally, that the figures and
the statements were either erroneous or
| inappropriate.
DR.. Halls contentious. If true, become
grave indictment Of the Department
of Commerce and of the Governments
statistical services and it is important
| that every effort be made to discover
what lies at the bottom Of the row.
After some delay, explained by the diff
fculty Of finding suitable men willing
to undertake the inquiry, Secretary Of
Commerce Lamont has announced the
personnel Of a committee of five promi-
nent economists who will investigate the
charges and counter charges and, 1t is
| to be presumed, make public its flnd-
ings.
AS everybody knows there are two
sorts OF bias that may creep into gov
ernmental reports and that must be
rigidly excluded at all costs. One comes
| from the editorial expression OF per-
sonal opinion which. no matter how sin
cerely and honestly it may have been
made, has no place in statement sup
posed to deal with unvarnished facts
! The other comes from desire to reflect
optimism that will bring credit to the
administration. 1t is important that
both types of meddling be excluded from
official statements of fact. And it is
not difficult to understand how an at
tempt to exclude one type of bias may
be construed as an attempt to include
the other.
AS long as DR.. Halls charges remained
unanswered by an unprejudiced exam
nation of their merit there would have
remained a suspicion regarding the value
of governmental statistics in portraying
the uncolored facts. 1t is not the first
time that such charges have been made.
And it is not the first time that a gov
ernmental official has lost his job and
blamed distortion of his reports as the
result.
The investigation should be far-reach-
ing and thorough.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1931-10-03
A Great Sportsman.

Nowhere in the whole English speak
ing world will there be more genuine
regret over the passing of Sir Thomas
Upton than in the United States, which
he claimed as a second home. The
American people knew him for the gall
liant sportsman that he was even better
than his fellow Britons, for Sir Thomas
long series of attempts to rescue the
Americas Cup from Yankee grasp had
as the scene of their futility the waters
that lap our own shores. The Atlantic
seaboard of this country saw half a
of the Royal Ulster Yacht Club, during
the course of the past twenty-five years.
None Of "Lipton's boats" was ever able
to subdue the American defender, but
no single one of them, either, ever
dipped its colors except in honor and
glorious defeat after contest Clearly
and skillfully sailed.
The Irish baronet was that noblest
of humans cheerful loser Disap-
pointment would overspread his rudy
features when defeat logged his foot
steps, as 1t so regularly and mercileSsly
did. But it never became discourage
ment. He insisted on coming back for
more-for victory, if obtainable, but for
fresh punishment, if that was to be his
lot. Just before his recent fatal illness
Sir Thomas was about to challenge once
more for the "old mug" he coveted
throughout three decades, after having
suffered another rebuff in 1890.
The recurring Anglo American yacht
races were more than international
aquatic events They were real cement
ers of good feeling between the two
branches Of the people who share in
common the language Of Milton and
Longfellow. Sir Thomas Upton be-
came an invaluable builder of English
speaking omradeship-an ambassador
Of good will comparable to the smiling
effectiveness of the Prince Of Wales
Whenever the sporting history of our
times is written an honorable niche will
be that occupied by Upton and his long
association with the races for the
Americas Cup. He was a man, take
him for all In ALL shall not look upon
his like again" might well be the cpl
taph Of the genial. gracious gentleman
now gathered to his fathers after life
Of eminence in world commerce and in
the annals OF Great Britain, Ireland and
the United States.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1931-10-03
Reed Wants Support
OF Missouri Democrats

From the Oklahoma City Times.
st. Louis dispatches reveal that for
mer Senator James A. Reed still nurses
presidential aspirations A capable poll
tician, he doubtless realizes he hasn't a
Chinaman's chance of getting the nom
nation, but he wants the support of the
Missouri delegation, and Missouri DEM
ocratS are fond of Jim Reed. The war
has been over long enough to keep Jim
Reeds senatorial record at that time
from being much Of handicap, but he
has had later quarrelS with the majority
leaders Of his party that still rankle.
His Missouri popularity is not dupli-
Gated in many other States. He is too
much lone lion of politics, as Senator
Borah is among the Republicans. to be
popular with the political leaders who
nominate Presidents.
1t is a notable fact. however. that the
Reed gesture has been instrumental In
curbing the boom for Franklin %.
Roosevelt in st. Louis. t is more likely
that Reed would swing III, strength to
Roosevelt than to Newton D. Baker, but
his action reduces. to the extent of the
Missouri delegation, the likelihood that
Gov. Roosevelt can 60 into the conven.
ton WIN the needed two-thiSdS ma.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1931-10-03
The Uncertainties of Base Ball.

The uncertainties of base ball were
never better demonstrated than in yes
terdsy's thriller between the Philadel-
phia Athletics and st. Louis Cardinals.
The game goes into the records as a
brilliant pitching triumph for diminu-
tive Bill Hsllahan of the Cardinals by
score Of 20, but, due to "boner"
by Catcher Jim Wilson, Hallahan's fine
effort might we'll have gone for naught.
1t was in the ninth inning. The st.
Louis pitcher, inclined to wildness all
afternoon, had only to dispose of his
opponents in that half Of the inning
and the game was over. But at this
crucial moment he could not get the
ball over the plate, walking both Fox
and Dykes with one put-out interven-
Ing TO put two Athletics ca the bases
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1931-10-03
Butler Stirs Controversy
When He Criticizes Leaders

brow democracy, with its many benef-
cent advantages, for high-broW dicta-
torSh1p with its autocratic methods
We doubt If DR.. Butler would advise
that"
Observing a demand for intellectual
and moral power and courage" the
Charlotte Observer voices the thought
That system OF social organization anc
control and that system of education is
failure which cannot discover excel
fence, give opportunity to excellence
and exalt excellence. This Is possible
IN letters. In the fine arts, in science
and in many Of the applications OF
knowledge to the practical problems OF
life. And the troublesome question re-
mains, Why should it remain so very
very difficult In the realm of politics
and government"
The soundness Of his statement Il
obvious to all who have given any
thought to the performances Of National
and State officials" thinks the Man.
chester Union. and the Newark Evening
News offers the explanation: We seem
TO have lost the ability to find leaders
set them up and follow them. Perhaps
we have lost Our own certainty OF
purpose"
FROM monroe 10 Harding, inclusive,
asks the New York Sun, with satirical
reference to the guessing game
oftered, ARE there half O dozen great
Presidents to be found? One mar. might
name Jackson, Lincoln, Cleveland
Roosevelt and Wilson and find no sixth
worthy OF inclusion; another might
insist on John Quincy Adams or Grant
or Monroe. The indenniteness Of the
standards Of greatness and the ineN-
table shadingS in mans judgment OF
man lend infinite zest to this new game
OF guessing the great Presidents. Those
not alert enough or too fatigued for
this game need only wait until the new
biographers have finished with the
presidents; then a completely revised
set OF opinions and judgments will be
available. Bryce did not think II
mattered particularly whether midget
or mighty sat in the Presidents chair
nrmness, common sense and honesty
ne held to be essential in a President
but not brilliance of intellect. This die
tum will not be allowed to interfere
With the pastjme OF compiling q list OF
the six great Presidents since Madison. u
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1931-10-03
SHOOTING STARS.
gY PHILANpER JOHNSON.

AutumnaI Custom.
The melancholy days are here
OF which the poet sings.
The prophet, as he does each year,
His sad prediction brings.
The Winter long will have no thaws
To melt the ice and snow.
am convinced of this because
A squirrel told me so.
And, while the skies grow gray and
chill.
I may as well suggest
That we prepare for every i'll
That binders human rest"
This melancholy Autumn song
Is warbled every year.
The custom has become so strong
That it must persevere.
For years we've managed to survive.
And play LIES merry game.
This year, no doubt, we will contrive
Somehow to do the same.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1931-10-03
Higghligghts OH the Wide World
Excerpts From Newspapers of Other Lands

tenn will be iraugurated, which should
correct and balance all the deficiencies
Of the present courses and give the
children a knowledge Immediately avail
able and useful for their various en-
pigments.
Chinese Steward Lives Up
To Best Traditions Of Service.
Sunday Referee, London,-Names Of
many aliens figure on the books Of his
majestys ships Of war.
Many people, reading with pride and
satisfaction the glowing tribute paid by
the first lord of the admiralty to the
gallantry of the men involved in the
disaster of the submarine PoSeidon,
were surprised to find q reference to
Offers Steward All Hal"
On the China station many ORR
entails are employed in this way. They
make excellent personal servants and
walters and they settle down happily
enough in their floating steel homes.
When occasion arises they can, as the
report reveals, live up to the highest
traditions OF the great service with
which they are associated.
Chinese are particularly useful IN
the flotilla of shallow-draft gunboats
which We maintain on the Yangtze.
Indians are employed in a similar
manner on the East Indies station, but
they. Of course. are British subjects.
The Royal Indian Marine is largely
dependent upon aliens for its stokehole
compliments. For this mysterious rea-
son, certain of the wild Pathan tribes
men from over the frontier take to the
dreadful heat of a ships boiler room in
the tropics like fish to water.
Before the war many Maltese found
employment as bandsmen and as stew
ards in ships of the Mediterranean feet,
but they, again, were British subjects,
though not Of British race.
Sydney Police
Observe Strict Silence.
The Bulletin, Sydney.-Melbourne DO
lice are interpreting the new orders
about not giving information to report
erS as intelligently as they did the
contrary regulations, which they appsr-
emily regarded as permitting them to
take the public into their confidence
about anything and everything via the
daily press. Recently a small motor
launch broke down and carried its three
occupants out into the immensely of
Port Phillip Bay. Late that night rela-
tives informed the police, but, true to
instructions, the force kept its mouth
firmly shut. The public did not know
the men were missing till two DAYS
later, when they were spotted by the
crew Of a Canadian steamer after being
so hours adrift.