Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1931-02-15
1.-THE Great Caviar Menace

What does this mean? How comes this sud
den and amazing increase in Russian caviar?
Are we caviar hungry by nature crafty
Russian propagandists steathlly working TO
make us caviar minded?
The slightest thought on the part of the true
patriot will convince him land her, too, If you
insist on bringing sex into it, that here is red
Russian propaganda in its deadliest form. With
caviar. Russia Is seeking 70 undermine our
republican institutions Already hundreds of
thousands of citizens saying This
caviar is good!" and it will be but step TO
have them saying Three cheers for RUSSIA"
and singing the International Already dis
suised agents, With their whiskers cut off ct
the roots. are whispering "CommuniStic Russia
produces this caviar; hoist the red flag over the
Capitol!"
Elphinus T. Clutz written TO me as presi-
dent of the Anti-Caviar 1907 America League.
Mr.. Clutz was sent to Russia to end II pos
sibIe the caviar propaganda, and he is doing
a noble work there.
1T was to study the nefarious caviar propa-
ganda he writes that I was sent to Russia rs
special agent of the Anti-CaVar 1907 America
League. Immediately upon my appointment
disguised myself a Russian, putting q full
beard in which was a small wren's nest con-
tanning six cunning little eggs and the mother
bird and proceeded to Moscow. without much
trouble found reasonably comfortable quarters
in a steam-heated moujik at 4 Penntsa Kola
Prospekt, with pleasant outlook on the Troika,
or Executionings Platz
1T will be remembered that the downfall Of
the Kerensky government occurred on August
S. 1915, or May 49, 1916, some other date.
For convenience have added these two dates
together and divided by two. This gives us
April IA, 1851 This according to the Old
Russian calendar. was something else, but
seems to have nothing to do with caviar, and
we might as well forget 1t carry 1t
the books until the last of the fiscal year.
when 1t would have to be charged to profit and
loss anyway. Please send me some money.
The result of the above events is what might
have been expected. Trotzky was at Vese-
ghonitZka. Lenin at Peremylshitzka.
Kalenin at Voroshlovitzka, and Kerensky
was at Dnneritzka. The third army, leaving
its trunk with the landlord crossed the Upper
Vodka and by forced marches reached Itzkav-
itzka. Kerensky, seeing all was lost put on his
overshoes and fed to Vitzkaitzka. The i'm
pOrtance of this will be if I refer to 1t
again. which Is not likely. Please send me
some cash.
The Red Revolution was thus a fact and
Immediately the ninth corps of secret agents
were disguised as balalaika players and SNUG
gled into the United States instructed TO say II
you will serve caviar snacks we will not sing the
Voga Boat Song Thousands of Americans
who did not want to hear the 'Volga Boat
Song began serving caviar Snacks with cock
tails 1t is to end this propaganda that am
here. Please send $500 by cable; / need
the money.
" AM sorry to say that have not been
able to do much toward ending the caviar
production here yet. This is due TO mis-
take of your typst. who wrote in my instrue-
tons Caviar is the leg Of surgeon You
ought to have better stenographers. for how
was to know the words should be Caviar is
the egg d the sturgeon? ] sanDot blame the