Brownsville herald. [volume] (Brownsville, Tex.) 1910-current, 1931-07-13
The Once Over


cNove companies plan salary cuts."-news item)
1t.
Girl Movie Star-Heard what?
Movie Magnate.-Weve got to reduce.
Star.-Tve already lost % pounds but you could
certainly stand a diet.
Magnate.-Tm talking about salaries. not weight.
How much are you getting now7
Star very bored) II don't know. They just drive up
in trucks and dump 1t In the conservatory in nice big
piles.
Magnate.-The books have YOU down for 100000
a year, loose and in packages. That's a lot Of money.
and the directors have met and voted 20 siash-T
think that's the word-salaries all along the line. We're
going to cut yours down by two $500 packages a
week.
Star thinking seriously How much Is twice $500.
Magnate.I dunno, but Ill have my secretary-hes
a college man-look It ND and tell you
Star counting on her fingers) 1t would be more
than $500 a week. That means I would only get some
thing like $4,000 a year. You can't cut my pay like
that II you do III quit.
Magnate Cdrearily-If you don't ven all quit.
Star Cquite agitated) II won't stand II. tell you'll
I'm a start I'm famousl I've had offers from every
where.
Magnate-Lissen. everybody's taking a cut. All T get
Is SS50O00 a year and I'm personally looping Sill a
week off my own salary.
Star Chysterically).-If you want to cut expenses
why don't you pay some OF those o~verpriced directors
less money?
Magnate.-I have cut directors salaries. Take Lubi-
cowz-he gets $4,000 a day. rain or shine. and only
this morning I sent him a letter notifying him that
beginning next week We would dock him 81 a week
Here's the letter right here on my desk now.
Star.-How Is the letter on your desk II you sent
1t to him7
Magnate tbitterlyl.-He sent II back
s
star.-well. I'm notifying you once and for all
that I'll take no salary reduction. A girl must live.
you know.
Magnate-There are times when can't see why.
Lissen. the situation Is serious. We're passing through
an economic depression
Star-A what2
acknowledgements depression. You know what
Star-Let's not talk about our operations.
MaRnate fpretty discouraged .=Lissen. baby. you've
heard rumors amt you. that there's a world trade
crisis. that there's been 4 big drop IN commodities
YOU know what commodities are. doncher7
star-You mean Mack sennett Commodities?
Magnate desperately)-Loo See II you can't
grab the idea III a general way Everything's
rotten Inventories are low. security levels are at
l4f LOWEST III YEARS iIt - ~ " I'LL - AONn
to 80 per cent Of production car loadings have tax
en- another drop and ! suppose you've heard about
Professor Irving Fishers index and analysis.
Starr didn't even know he was sick.
Magnate with a low gurgle) Quick, the adrenal-
inel
AND STILL LOOKING
The truth about that nIrht OF 500 airpianes over
the country is out at last. they're trying to locate an
optimist.
Secretary OF the Navy Adams has abolished The holv-
stone IN cleaning decks. The secretary saws u wears
out the decks This viii be news TO ANYBODY who has
observed the light touch OF the modern sailor.
If We were Toscanini we would PLAY the Fascist
HYMN III order to get out or the country. But then
We would halt. just across the border. summon the
orchestra and play yes. We Have No Bananas"
alternating n with the Phooey Song from "Salami"
Thomas Edison took the wrong bottle BY mistake
the other day. Further evidence that our best minds
these DAYS are highly falhble.
Newfoundland Is reported in financial trouble. Co
ing 70 the dogs. obviously.
Already there Is talk Of naming a town after Gatty
Gettysburg. presumably.