davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington times., 1931-03-23

One of the greatest and, in a
sense, ironic contrasts is af-
forded by the genius and the
disposition of Alfred Bernhard
Nobel, the great inventor. The
man was frail in body and SEN
sitive in temperament to an ex-
treme degree. He was constant
ly working with nitroglycer-
inc: yet if it touched his skin
he was violently affected by its
influence, having to lie down
to recover from its effects.
Although himself fragile and
delicate, he dealt with the
most powerfully destructive
materials known to man. He
was the inventor Of dynamite
and various other forms Of
high explosives, and accumu-
lated a great fortune through
their invention and manufac-
ture. =
Another great contrast is
found in the career Of this ex-
traordinary man. The greater
part of his life was devoted to
the creation of implements Of
war. Untold damage Of the
most horrible and devastating
character could be, and has
been, wrought by the high ex-
plosives which he invented.
Advocate of Peace
And yet, after he had accumu-
lated a fortune Of nearly ten
million dollars, he devoted a
great part of it to the cause OF
promoting and furthering world
peace, and bringing about fra
ternity and goodwill among all
the nations of the earth: II
would seem as if, in his will, he
had sought to undo what ne
had devoted his entire lie 10
accomplish.
The will Of Alfred Nobel is
one of the historic documents
of modern times. Under its
terms a number Of prizes, some
$37,5OO each and sometimes
more, are annually awarded to
those people, men or womena IT.
respective of nationality, who
during the 12-month have made
the most important discoveries
in physics, chemistry or physl-
ology, or have written the best
literature "of an idealistlc ten,
dency," or have contributed
most to the cause of interna-
tional brotherhood, in the sup
preston or reduction of stand
ing armies, or in the establish
ment or furtherance Of peace.
No other bequest in modern
The Washington times., 1931-03-23
Listen, World!
BY Elsie Robinson

1SUUIAlSUIl--
Well, things couldn't be any
worse-that was sure. The eX-
pertinent was worth trying. E.
IN SUDDEN EXASPERATION
I STOOD UP, FACED THE
WHOLE SHOW AND SAID
'I DON'T KNOW"
And u d d e My, amazingly,
everything changed!
At those magic words all the
tight explanations and Stingy
solutions which I had tied on
people and things dropped
away. dropped away like dingy
SheathS. and Life emerged in
it's vast unreasonable beauty, in
it's infinite variety and mystery.
And I saw that you couldn't
refine or explain Life-that
Life went on and on, beyond
all Interruptions and confuslons
and mistakes.
And I saw that you couldn't
define or explain Man-that he;
too, went on and on, beyond
the feeble and furious things
of his body, beyond the foolish
miShaps of experience. .on and
on, into unexpected beauty and
bravery
One Never Knows
Even the dullest Life, even
the weakest Man, went on like
that. You never could tell
No, you never could tell
about God or Life or Man or
Yourself. But it didn't matter.
Everything went right along
even if you couldn't explain 1t.
You went right along, too
seeing visions you couldn't un-
derstand, bearing harveSts you
couldn't analyze. And Life was
much more loveable, and God
somehow, nearer, if you didn't
try to know it all. You even
got on better with Yourself.
Why do I say-"I don't
know?" That's why. Because
I have discovered that no one
can know. BUT THE SMART
ONES WATCH AND WONDER.
copyright, 1881, King Features
syndicate Inc.)
The Washington times., 1931-03-23

Someone writes: "Why do
you so often say, I don't
know?' You're supposed to
know. If you don't, your boss
had better hire someone who
does"
Maybe so, stranger. And if
my boss starts looking, he'll
doubtless find many who feel
better equipped to write this
column than I . for People
Who Know Everything are the
commonest thing there is in any
market. And yet-there are
certain large advantages in not
knowing and being willing to
admit it
Not that I was always this
way. Like most youngsters, I
started with the idea that I had
the Inside Dope on all creation.
Were you puzzled by God. be
wildered by Life. Confused
about your neighbor. .uncer-
tain about yourself? Ask me!
I had an answer for everything!
"Anything But"
From which you might think
that I was sitting pretty and
having a grand time. AS a mat
ter Of fact, was anything but!
For the more I knew, or
thought I knew. the more mis-
erable I @Selt. Instead Of widen
ing life into an alluring adven-
ture, my knowledge" made it
seem q biological blunder. In
stead of glorifying and illumi-
mating man, my reasoning made
a bum of him.
All of which was very dis
cou. aging? What was the use
of taking a chance with life
when it was such a fizzle, or
with l.lar when he was such a
flop? So I reasoned. And the
more I reasoned, the sicker I
got. Until gradually it began
to dawn on me that knowledge
wasn't such a treat, after all.
THAT I NIGHT EVEN
HAVE MORE FUN IF I DIDN'T
KNOW so MUCHl
The Washington times., 1931-03-23
The Marry-GO-ROund
BY Helen Rowland.

That the reason the shops are
selling more stuff this srring
is not because Of the Buy
now!" campaign, but because
the styles are more tempting.
A woman doesn't buy clothes
because she needs them, but
because she can't RESIST them.
Shopping is not a duty, it is a
joyous jag!
That a psychologist will tell
you that gentlemen prefer
blondes" because, when they
were little boys, all the angels
on the Christmas cards and all
the princesses in the fairy-taleS
had long, golden hair, while
all the witches and wicked
sisters" had raven locks. It's
"fixation" or something.
That, when a woman'E hair
turns red overnight. it is from
worry. Worry for fear she'll get
gray.
That those new vatican hats
are going to be the cause of
many sudden and unexpected
engagements this spring. It's
hard to resist a girl who's wear
ing one of them.
That love, like roSe-fever and
spring colds, is very contagious
at this time of the year. A man
who wants to hang onto his
single blessedneSs had better
cross his fingers, shut his eyes,
and keep his heart hermeti-
cally sealed.
That you can never Judge a
mans courage by his attitude
toward his wife. She may be
the only thing in the wide,
wide world that he is afraid of.
Copyright. 1891, King Features
Syndicate, Inc.)
The Washington times., 1931-03-23
Youths in Hold-Up Crimes

There is something of import for Washington police
and cmnoogists think the fact that many
hodups this city recently have been by youths News
ports from elsewhere also indicate startling crime increases
the part of boys and young
TO large extent also the youthful criminals do ap
pear be regulars gangsers Their methods frequently
indicate that they noces in dangerous law violations
In this city there not the environment and atmosphere
that produces many criminals The be found in
other directions disrepect of law prvaton due to
unemployment to extravagant ways of living Whatever
official analysis would be helpful in probable crime
prevention.
Eradication possible of the of crime among young
men is fully important as law enforcement
The Washington times., 1931-03-23
Responsibility For
Growth of Crime
Editor, Times:

EGICOf, ItnGeS:
We all know that crime is one
of the ever-increasing problems
which this country has to face.
Economic depresSions tend to in
crease crime greatly. Crime is,
however, older than economic
depreSsions. Undesirable en-
vironment is the outgrowth of
existing social and economic
conditions. The feeble-minded
are the most susceptible to evil
associates and sensational re-
ports about criminals. Any
form of notoriety appeals to the
abnormal nature of the crimi-
nal. Bigger and better prisons
will not cure crime. Education
and hope should be used early
in life.
Punishment should be used
only as a last resort. Protection
and prevention are true safe
guards. Society must protect it.
self by caring for the "nitwit"
and "feeble-minded" in super.
vised institutions. Reformation
The Washington times., 1931-03-23

State in the past six months.
Who are they? Not long ago
some of them were in good cir
cumstances. One was a doctor
of philosophy, listed in who's
Who" One had entertained two
Presidents in his home. An
other dealt in ostrich feathers.
He lost his fortune when ostrich
feathers went out of fashion.
Fashion is cruel, relentless; it
makes and breaks.
Poverty is not always due to
shiftlessness. No man is re-
sponsible for all the circum-
stances that confront him But
man, if he is thoughtful, intelli-
gent, living an orderly life, can
prepare for the future. If you
have even a small income and
do not save a little, you will
probably not save when, if ever,
The Washington times., 1931-03-23
TIMES TEST

Do you know:
l. Who is the American Am
bassador to Italy?
2. Who is the first white
man to cross the unknown
southern desert Of Arabia?
3. What world-famous Aus
tralian soprano died re-
Gently?
4. In what war was William
RosencranS a commander?
5. What famous boat was
called Clermont?
Fill each blank:
6. The party elected
John Adams President.
Z. Roxanne is the heroine
8. The villain Of Uncle
Toms Cabin" is
8. The greatest of Peace
Congresses assembled in
the year
10. Daniel Webster was called
the defender Of
Match correctly:
IL. Tyre detected
IL. glutton a Stringed
13. eminent instrument
IA. fit suitable
Is. creStfallen gormandizer
distinguished
ANSWERS ON MaKazine Page)
The Washington times., 1931-03-23
Our National Anthem

through the persistence of Maryands two Senators
that Congress passed the brief law declaring
Banner" to be the National Anthem.
There be widespread popular approval of this act
which will certainly add to the patriotic enthusiasm next year.
the 2O0th anniversary of the birth of Washington.
When Francis Scott Key this anthem with the British
burning Washington this nation not the powerful one it
is but the influence of the starspanged Banner on
national patriotism has been immense Now that is the
official anthem its influence will be still greater
The Washington times., 1931-03-23
As You Suspected

As You Suspected
Here are some things that
you may have suspected
That those stunning silver
blondes. so popular with artists,
are handmade and not born
that way. White henna is the
secret.
That the average woman's
popularity with men is about
is or 20 years shorter than it
was in the good old days, B. F.
(before feminism) And this in
spite of the fact that she keeps
her youthful looks Is or 20
years longer. But the days.
when a widow of flair, fat and
forty" was regarded as a
charmer, are gone, forever.
Cause: The sophiStic ated
flapper.
That classic noses are becom-
ing more popular than the
p1AudA1tS OP-U4AUCA FoAAC -NNO
they'll never be as tempting ito
kiss under"
That the only diet a woman
can feed a man, which will
agree with him, is a steady diet
of appleSauce.
That the reason the older
women cling to bobbed hair is
because they recall with groans
and shudders, those terrible
Sunday mornings, when they
got vertigo hanging their heads
out Of the window to dry, after
q back-breaking shampoo.
That it was once the fad
for men to have the barker
cut, dimples in their cheeks
(wouldn't that jar youO by
nipping out a piece 0f flesh
from the inside.
The Washington times., 1931-03-23

is the ideal course with the ur-
hardened criminal. Formation
of upright character and good
habits will make reformation
unnecessary. Mental and moral
habits that affect the entire life
of men and women are formed
during early years of childhood.
The responsibility, in my opjn-
ion, for laying the foundations
of fine manhood and woman
hood rests on the home, parents,
church and school.
JOHN G. KRANING
Prepare Now For
Future Setbacks
Editor, Times:
We read that more than
$1,000 persons have applied for
old-age pensions in New York
The Washington times., 1931-03-23
no YOU KNOW THAT

There are $4,000 Russians and
$1,000 Poles living in London
England.
Forty per cent Of the effect
tives of the French Foreign LIE
gion are from Germany.
BY a publication Of wood
cellulose, it is now possible to
produce commercially. a series
of wood products distinctly diff.
ferent from ordinary wood
pulps.
The Washington times., 1931-03-23
Hearst Papers Advocate

Honest friendship NTH entGHoItn0 alliances
NTH none"-jeorDe Washington.
Proportional representation United States Senate
State haze than Senator's Legislation to enforce
prompt constitutional reapporttonment In the House OF
Representatives.
Separate departments Of Army the NGuy and OF the
Air Forces all united under Secretary OF National Detese
Federal action to the limit of Federal poDers abolish
Literdcy under Secretary of Education
the President the first OF January foLo
ing the November election
immigration admit only those suited for Anert
citizenship and Ana~tcGn needs.
Deportation OF undesirable aliens and extension OF citizen
ship period to 10 years.
Complete publicity for to prevent big tGr
dodgers from escaping TAXATION
Modification the VolSteGd act to permit light Utnes and
beers under Federal regulation.
The Washington times., 1931-03-23

you have a large income. Most
men over IS are wholly or
partly dependent on others for
their support. The time to pre-
pare is when you are young and
strong, when the going is good.
PHIL uOSOPHER
The Washington times., 1931-03-23
WISE MEN

There's a place and means
for every man alive.
Shakespeare.
The widest colts make the
best horses. -Plutarch.
The tests of the rich are ever
successful. Goldsmith.
The Washington times., 1931-03-23
Persia has only IS doctors.

Persia has only Is doctors.
The newest machine guns fire
from 600 to 800 rounds per min
ute.
Forty messages can now be
sent over one wire by a new
telegraphic system developed in
England.
Scientists in France claim to
have found a serum which is an
absolute preventive Of measles.
The Washington times., 1931-05-09

up for you at Bruges, could
easily date back to at least
1900"
by Jove! So it could! 1t
also proves that they faceted
their stones back in those days,
too, now doesn't it. That's a
mighty interesting point. That's
what I mean. Jennifer, by the
historical value of inanimate
things"
1t was Rarick's way of at
tempting to justify to his daugh-
ter the telling of the risque
story. Even at his worst, the
talk of Gerkes mattered, which
was more than he could say
of the endless sluiceS of it
that roared through the Rarick
functions" was what he was
desperately and in his clumsy,
antagonizing way, trying to con-
Vey to Jennifer.
And strangely enough, Jen-
nifer'S reaction to one whom
she might just as readily have
regarded as vile old bore, was
as rare to herself as it was to
Rarick.
After coffee, when the can
dies softened down closer to
their reflection in the long fine
pool of table, and Jenny man
euvering to eXtricate her daugh-
ter from the wise of a dull eve
ming, suggested that she accom-
pany her to the last act, of
Louise" for which a pair of
tickets were going begging, there
was hesitation from Jennifer.
A Concession Is Made
She knew that after the
opera they were sure to join up
with the ChadWickS and the
Edgertons for dancing at Flor
entine's. Except for the Seduc-
tive fact that Berry Rhodes
might also be in the party, and
Berry could tango like the
Argentine Republic, Jennifer
for the moment wanted to re-
main around the pool of quiet
talk and quiet candlelight and
the slow, Syrupy flow of
liquors and the intellectual lus-
ter of this dim old fogy, Gerkes.
Except there was that seduc-
tive possibility that Berry might
drop in at Florentine's.
I'm glad you're going to
stick around" she told Gerkes,
when she gave him her hand
in goodnight.
'Dr. GerkeS has promised to
The Washington times., 1931-05-09
The Marry-GO-ROund
BY Helen Rowland.

Beloved For, I am DYING to
go!
But the wise wife layeth out
her husbands evening clothes
and ordereth the taxicab. Yea,
she purchaseth the tickets and
ordereth the table at the res
taurant.
And behold, it is settled.
There is no argument-and no
escape!
The foolish wife beggeth her
husband to help her find the
new apartment, and Seeketh his
judgment upon the wall paper.
But the wise wife conSulteth her
own wisdom; and when moving
day arriveth, she leadeth him to
his abode. And, 10, he is de-
delighted.
The foolish wife donneth her
new hat in doubt, lest it may
not meet the approval of her
lord. Yea, she taketh him
shopping with her and seeketh
his approval and commenda-
ton, upon all her garments.
But the wise wife locketh her
hat within the closet and
leaveth it there, until the mil
liner hath long since been paid
and the bill forgotten. And
when she springeth it upon her
husband, he knoweth not
whether it is last years vint-
age or this years extravaganza.
And his remonstrance is broken
against him.
The foolish wife conSulteth
her husband in all her ways,
her goings and her comings,
her clubs and her pastimes.
But the wise wife koeth
WhereSoeVer she listeth-and
telleth him about it, AFTER
WARD.
The foolish wife courteth ad-
vice and criticism and approval.
She asketh for a ruling" and
getteth it. But the wise wife
maketh her own decisionS-and
aSketh her Beloved'S OPINION
only when the thing hath been
accomplished.
For she knoweth in her heart
that that which is open to argu-
ment will be greeted with argu-
ment, and that that which is
submitted for criticism will al
ways receive criticism. For, how
else can a man display his good
judgment?"
But that which is already &C
compliShed is a FACT. And a
man accepteth facts" without
question. SELAH.
Copyright, 1891, King Features
Syndicate Inc.)
The Washington times., 1931-05-09
By Fannie Hurst
DIET AND HEALTH
BY DR.. Logan Clendening

The dream Of growing young
again or Of remaining forever
young has always obseSSed man.
kind and womankind. FXpedi-
tions no longer go in search Of
the fountain of youth, b'lt the
world looks hopefully and wist-
fully to medical science to dis
cover the exquisite elixir. DR..
Tobey says that the fountain OF
youth is filled with pure, clean
milk, and points to the long
lived herdsmen Of dairy coun-
tries to prove it. But just now
the hopes Of the world seem
more centered on the ductleSS
glands, with this object, than
elsewhere.
Ductless Glands Hold Hope
Many familiar physiological
facts point to the reasonable
ness of this hope. The whole
system Of ductlesS glands comes
to maturity with the full bios
soming of bodily vigor at the
period Of adolescence. And the
period of involution in middle
age, marked especially by the
decline of the vigor of the sex
ual life, is also the period OF
atrophy and lessened activity OF
all the ductleSs glands.
The influence Of the glands
on sexual activity is one Of the
four cardinal functions the Sys-
tenn has, the other three being
their influence on general nu-
triton, growth and the smooth
muscle balance of the body.
But to the successful restora-
ton of the sex glands to full
activity there are at least two
stumbling blocks. One is that
we have no accurate knowledge
of the nature of the internal
secretions of the sex glands
themselves. For the female,
indeed, an active preparation
has been discovered, but the
difficulties of it's administra-
ton are very great. 1t is ex-
creted by the body so rapidly
after its introduction that it
does not remain in the body
long enough to do any good. 1t
is probable that nature provides
another secretion to fix it in the
body, under normal conditions
of bodily activity, and what
that other secretion is we do
not know.
No Cure For Old Age
For the male there is no Sc
cretion of any kind that has
been isolated. In spite of the
gaudy promises Of Voronoff
and others, who claimed to be
able to turn old men into boys
again, the old men continue to
get older.
Another difficulty is that We
The Washington times., 1931-05-09

himself tomorrow evening, if
you will join U.S."
Have a footStool ready for
me every evening, DR.. Gerkes.
I'm going to try a new way OF
showing myself a good time. My
present is a flop. Until tomor-
row. ."
Only a Promise
Poor Jennifer. She meant it.
But, as matter of fact, she
saw him exactly two subsequent
times, that high-exciting and
excited winter of her 23rd year.
Once when muffled from her
knees to the tip Of her nose
in an ermine-and sable wrap,
she had rushed downstairs be-
tween two young men who were
making noises with their teeth
like ukuleleS, just in time to
nod to Gerkes as he came out
of her fathers library with a
stack Of books in his hand.
The second time, she had
seen him quite crazily, through
The Washington times., 1931-05-09

make this his home indefi-
nitely."
Let me come up, will you,
and get on to some books to
read and some things to think
about"
Come up and I'll show you
a manuscript of the ninth cen
tury, which I am tranSlating
for a library in Cologne. 1t
will make the hottest SeXnoVel
in your library look like iuVe-
nile book"
II think you're immense. You
keep your feet nice and pedi-
cured, because I am going to
sit at them. Do you think you
can convert a sow's ear into a
silk purse?"
Il might find I have a silk
purse to start with, and what
if I should unwittingly reduce
, it to a sow's ear?"
Father, where did you find
HIM"
DIR. Gerkes will tell you for
The Washington times., 1931-05-09

a keyhole. She was never to
be quite clear about that, how
ever. It was 6 o'clock in the
morning and she had been ION
a party" with Berry Rhodes.
The door before which she had
crouched had lurched about so;
and so had the figure of DR..
Gerkes, seen crafty through
the keyhole.
Jenny, standing before a full
length, three-Sided mirror, did
an uncharacteristic thing. She
removed from the front of her
peignoir of coffee-colored lace,
a small cascade of ruffles,
which left her chest bare,
daubed powder on to the v,
and then stood off to survey.
Her bathroom, an enormous
one guiltless of tile, cleverly dis
guised in rugs, taffetas,
Sunken bathtub with growing
plants on its coping, and porce-
lain water-birds on little stands
against a background of glazed
Chinese wallpaper, reflected
her figure over and over
again. Now, standing before the
mirror, holding the cascade of
coffee-colored lace alternately
against her chest and then re-
moving it, she finally decided
to leave it off, feeling strangely
not herself as she did so.
AS matter of fact, she was
not herself. So strangely not
herself that once she crossed
her arms over her flat chest
and Rugged her shoulders in an
exultant little fashion.
Just a GigOlO
The no-longer-to-be-evaded
truth of it was that Jenny,
whose impeccable wifehood, ex-
tending over a period of %
years, had been an easy virtue,
was excited away and beyond
her usual and curiously vola-
tile air of composure, by the
fact that a young Argentine,
named Ramona Lopez, was
coming in for a five o'clock
cocktail with her in the con-
servatory.
It had been arranged in the
hurried breaking up of a party
at the Ambassador the pre-
vious afternoon. Abbey Chad
wick had asked twenty to tea
and dancing, including young
Lopez, who was said to be a
paid dancer, at Florentine's, a
gigolo of exalted type who
mingled socially by virtue Of
his connections, but who, never
theless was paid by the man.
agement.
He had sat next to Jennifer
at the Ambassador and had
coaxed her to attempt a tango
which she had never before
ventured on a public floor.
The son Of a partially defunct
coffee king. whose fortune had
been spent in defending his
daughter, Blanca, from the
charge Of having shot and in
stantly killed her young roue of
a millionaire husband as he was
leaving his racing stable. Ra-
mond's anomalous position kept
him lowering precariously be-
tween two worlds.
At Ramond's lispings, some
thing starved in Jenny had
lifted its deSolate head. Except
ing for the months Of court
ship, when an eager, rather
timidly idealistic young clerk
had wooed the Intelligent look
ing Jenny Avery on the "chig-
ger" infested banks Of the
Meramac., there had been prec-
ious few words. except in plati-
tude. addressed warmly and
closely into Jenny'S eyes.
docs Jenny allow herself to
be drawn into an intrigue by
Ramona? Read Mondays alb
sOrbing inStalmsnt).
Copyright 1899 nv fannie HURST
Distributed by King Features Syndi
cate, Inc.)