The Washington times., 1931-08-26
True to Type
COWARDLY CRITIC
TAKES A RAP AT
BOXING
Rv GILBERT SELDES-

professional sport writers have had their say about
prize fight; it is inglorious and unmanly but it keeps
from making fool of myself, from saying that the
prelimnarieS better show than the main bout,
that Mike the Mauler has more class than Slugger
Sam. am not always exactly wrong; my instincts
are good But am ignorant and just likely as not
to call round inning. And am such thorough
bred fight fan wo fights in three years. that never
hear the bell Sometimes forget to look at the ring
Wanted A Good Fight
The who know inform that the fight last
week between Jimmy McLarnin and Billy Petrole was
something short of masterpiece not quite classic not
a memorable occasion in the glorious history of the
ring. I'm glad to hear it, confirmation OF my own
opinion At uncertain intervals shall continue to
to fights until l which the experts declare
perfect Then shall either discard my theory that
prize fighting is the most oVerrated sport in the world
crawl all fours to the desks of Messrs. Corum
Igoe and Farnsworth and ask to be forgiven my sins
and washed clean of my hereSy At present tsel that
good wouldn't be any good at ALL
Once in my youth I took boxing lessons, from
pug. He had protruding stomach and was dandy
dancer his feet He would say to me, Nov, hit
in the face" If obeyed orders, he would block
me- if the temptation of his paunch too enormous
and would lunge at it, he would slap me down hard
and tap me the chin by way of teaching my
place. l recognized his science and his skill.
Where's the Science?
Yet when see two men in the ring who are sup
posed to be more less equal in weight experience,
and address, they both look like ham actors to me.
They at each other without any perceptbe effect
they fall into cnches and have to be separated which
to to first base with his bat and bring down
the baseman's head Either they do not know the
rules or the rules absurd.
Occasionally they blind opponent, fling him
against the ropes, render him almost unconscious with
bows-and then they stand off and admire their work.
although the point of the contest if any, is to knock
him out. They get man out of position and are so
far out of position themselves that they cannot take
advantage Of it; they deliver mighty punches which
celebrated rights and efts to vulnerable spos there is
energy behind them.
Not Hot News
have yet to see fighter with any style CTm told
they EXIST. McLarnin credited with class, pre-
sumaby because the smaller Petrolle bobbed and
jumped and ran about good deal, and McLarnin
you can learn from the ring is the unexciting
that it takes lot to knock man down and that
when he down. he is not necessarlyout. I've heard
all that before but is pleasing to see man knocked
down twice in the second round, stagger about until
the bell rings, and then come back and fight like
demon for a draw. (Ths would be preliminary
People who talk about science probably we'll in
formed but hardly believe that out of
hundred spectators cares a. hang for it. The moment
the fighters stop maung another the spectators
grow nasty They begin the rather terrifying rhythmical
clapping which signifies the bird At the prospect of
Knockout, when sugger is slammng the other all
the ring the onookers rse with ascending of
peasure but if the knockout doesn't they SUBJ
side, disappointed; whereas if they cared hoot in
hell for the skill the stamina and courage
which the fight is supposed to exhibit they should be
enchanted at the escape Of the man who is being
beaten. Even the bufght fans of Spain applaud the
fighter when he escapes the bull.
The Vocal Wits
Several generations ago FAM annoyed at the tactics
of two BOXERS yelled request for the next Dance
some such witticiSm 1t wen received, and since
then thousands of people feel to be bright
and loud at the expense of the fighters They in
frequently funny. If they drunk and mix the
names of the fighters Qke radio announcers trying
very hard to make match exciting) you may get
amusement out of it, Nine times out of ten they
stick monotonously to one theme-they offer machine
guns baseball bats. Their technical commentary is
no better They always wanting Jimmy to stick
out that left or Billy to make him miss. They have
read something in the papers, gather and are willing
to make their knowledge public -
The only bloodthirsty spectator encountered the
other night boy of about fourteen, far too we'll
dressed far too fat and far too vocal His guardian
l presume, because any father would be too embar-
rassed to have stood the chatter-took him away still
muttering, after the main bout The of the men
and women not hankering for actual blood all
they wanted was a lot of punches and knockout
They never got them. ~
A Pretty Sight
This sort of thing hear, has been going ON for gen.
erations But the ballyhoo is recent invention. Some
of the great fights of the past historic ones took place