The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1931-06-18
Grou,ing With
Your Child
AFFECTION

Your Child
AFFECTION
The Institute of Child Welfare of
the University Of Minnesota.
That simple, pleasurable emotion
which is later to develop into love
or affection, is stimulated at first
by stroking or caressing the baby's
body. Certain parts Of the skin sur
face are particularly sensitive to
stimulation by touch. These sensi-
tive zones, as they are called, in
clude more especially those parts
of the body where the outer skin
surface and the delicate inner
mucuos membranes come together,
such as the skin about the mouth.
In these small beginnings the
pleasurable experiences of the child
have their source. The patting,
cuddling and caressing of the baby
which is the adults way of seeking
a pleasurable emotion for himself
in his contacts with the child-by
degrees come to have a meaning to
the child. The pleasant sensations
come to be connected with certain
individuals, and the child soon
smiles on the mother or nurse
whose gentle touch has aroused
feeling in which lie the rudiments
of the individuals affection.
4Is l.
develops mentally. He does not, or
should not, long remain at the
stage where sucking his thumb af-
fords him delight.
If he has companions, a doll or a
dog on which to expend his grow
ing affectionate impulse, he will be
less likely to have recourse to
habits, of babyhood to bring him
satisfaction. Any temperance of
babyish habits, such as thumb
sucking or bed-wetting in a child
who has been completely trained.
calls for inquiry into his emotional
life, which is likely to show some
lack.
The wise parent will try to de-
velop his children's affection along
normal lines that will bring the
most contentment to him and not
be a source of unhappiness in
others.
The mother naturally becomes
the first object of the child's affec-
ton, as it is her care that sur
rounds him and makes possible
any feelings of pleasure. She must
use care not to exert too powerful
an influence over the growth Of his
affections. Being constantly with a
child, sleeping with it, protecting it
from every bump or fall, is not
kindness, though it is hard for the
mother, whose love for and DEEPEN
dence on the baby is increasing at
rapid rate, to realize that such
constant anxious care is not always
to the child's future interest.
Ignorance of and indifference to-
ward the child's need of love is
just as disastrous, but is less in
sidious from trouble than the over
dependence brought about as the
result of too great a display of af-
lection.
Parents are sometimes panied
and reproachful when their child
rem fail to exhibit kind and gener-
Gus behavior toward other child
rem. To the child of two, who is
just realizing himself as an indi-
vidual, his possessions anything he
can lay hands on to grasp, WELD,
push or throw-are peculiarly a
part of him. Yet people often ask a
child of from eighteen months to
five years, to share his belongings,
and do SO without any previous ex-
PLANTATION or training.
AS soon as children are old
enough to run about, they must be
taught to play together, to share
their playthings, and to respect the
rights of others. It is unreasonable
to expect a child who has always
played alone, suddenly to hand
over, with good grace, when a
small visitor comes, the toys which
have been his exclusive property.
One mother always took great
pains to prepare her child for the
coming of guest, talking over
which toys the guest would parti-
cularly enjoy. The child entered in
to the play and took great delight
in sharing toys which he might
have clutched selfishly had he not
been given the opportunity to CO.
operate.
When children in family have
trouble over toys, it is important
not to risk an unfair decision.
When it is necessary for you to
interfere, it is safer to deprive
both children of the toy, or of the
privilege of playing together, be-
cause of the almost unavoidable,
unconscious inclination of the
mother to discriminate in favor of
one child. AS general rule, inter-
ference of the parents in children's
difficulties means antagonism
built up somewhere. 1t is as bad
for a younger child to be favored
continually as it is for an older one
to store up jealous feelings for the
younger.