Brownsville herald. [volume] (Brownsville, Tex.) 1910-current, 1931-08-31
The
Once Oer
BY Il. 7 PHILLIPS
THE PRIVACY OF CALVIN
COOLIDGE

COOLIDGE
8 a. m.-The ex-PreSident Is
awakened by the footing OF summer
tourists getting an early start home
after an overnight stop at Ply
mouth.
6:30-He hears a strange noise
downstairs, and, investigating, finds
several strangers chopping chips out
Of the porch for souvenirs.
z a. m.-He opens front door TO
let out the chow and is startled by
cries OF Hold It'll" BY an army Of
amateur photographers who have
been hiding in the front yard for
just such a snapshot.
7:l5-Mrs. Coolidge at breakfast
remarks: 1T looks like a nice day.
Calvin answers: "Where?"
8 a. m.-The ex-President takes
a walk around the yard and cause
an immediate traffic tie-up as
scores Of tourists jam on the brakes
and exclaim: There he is. Emmal"
Yep. that's him. He sure Is a plain
Joker. Amt he. Willard?" II think
he's put on a little weight since he
turned newspaper man" Wouldn't
YOU think he'd cut out those high
collars in Augusta" &c, sc.
9 a. m.-The letter carrier deliv-
ers q couple OF postcards. and. as
Mr.. Coolidge takes them. three
groups Of school teachers. four
platoons OF visiting Rotarians and
a various assortment of dusty
strangers swing into action again
with their cameras. In the con-
fusion an Elk from Sioux City
socks a retired pothook manufac-
turer OF Bangor, Maine. in the eve
for stepping in front Of the Presi-
der just as he snapped the shut
ter.
$3.50 a. m.-The main street Of
Plymouth now begins 10 iell up
with new arrivals from all points.
TIL procession is slowed up cOnsid-
erably by a fake declaration BY a
Cape Cod tourist IN a linen suit
that he has Just seen the ex-PreSi-
dent enter 4 barber shop. Before
10 Is established that the barber
shop patron is a buggy striper named
Ed Hofacker traffic has been az a
Standstill for a half hour. Traffic
is moved again through a report
that Calvin Coolidge has Just en-
tered the general store and Is buy
ing a pound OF butter.
10 a. MIR. Coolidge would like
10 walk yer 70 the center or the
village, but can't get across the
street, due 10 the rush Of tourists
driving to the cheese factory. They
really don't want any cheese, but
think that because of its adiacency
10 the Coolidge home they may get
a better view Of Mr.. and Mrs.
Coolidge.
1890 a. m. Calvin decides 70 make
a break for the general store.
Noon.-He reached the store
pretty worn and spent as a result
OF a struggle with autograph hunt
ers, bugs KhO insist they were
original Coolidge men. women who
chirp Three cheers for the next
PRESIDENT and a couple OF fellows
who want 10 sell him a bird. dog.
/ p. m-The general store reports
the biggest tourist trade Of the week
and expresses regret that Calvin
doesn't stay longer TO hold the
, customers. Mr.. Coolidge has a rather
tough time leaving at that. and has
to delay his return a half hour ~
order to pose sitting on the store
steps for the r~otOgravure sections
OF 300 Sunday newspapers.
2 p. m-Calvin decided 10 take a
nap. Just as he settles down a head
protrudes from under the sofa and
the fellow -~nnounces that as the
representative Of three news svndi-
Gates he has been hiding there
twelve hours in order TO reach him
for an exclusive interview on wheth-
or he would accept another term III
the White House or PREFERS HIS
PRESENT PRIVACY?
Irvo reports the case or a speak
easy proprietor SO thoughtful that
he runs a place across the street
from a park 50 the customers can
all 90 TO bed on the grass con-
veniently.
WANTED - Building speciality
man. one who has an expensive
following with architects and build
ers. r. 53i."-New York Times.
You know the kind.
WON OVER
/ once had a hatred Of makeup