Plentywood herald. [volume] (Plentywood, Mont.) 1908-current, 1931-12-31
By | N LARDNER

To the Editor:
This is Just a few items OF Informal
tlon about a ball player that maybe
you have never heard Of him so l
will tell you his name In the hrst
paragraph and his name Is George
Ruth, but they call him Babe on acct
of him bein. over 9 IT. tall and pretty
near as wide and he IS a great left
hand pitcher that don't pitch.
Well, / day In May i had seen
a whole lot Of sporting events that
bores you to death and the WHITE
Sox from old Chi was playing In New
York City so l thought | needed d lit
tie more boreing. so l went to the
Yankees Stadium and went down to
the bench and Mgr. Schalk was set
ting there and he says hello to me
but | Just made a face at him, but
he asked me to Set down a minute
and q boy named Thomas was going
to pitch and he was out there warm
Ing up and finely he got warmed and
came into the bench and Mgr. Schalk
said:
"Come here and sit down a minute,
Tommy, as | want to talk to YOU"
So Tommy. set down and Mgr.
Schalk said to him:
..Say, listen Tommy. They's a man
on this New York club named Ruth
and he isn't Cobb and he isn't Speak
err or Slsler or Jackson. He Is a bird
that II you ever throw a ball where
he can reach 1t that ball won't be
available for tomorrow's game and
baseballs cost as much money as
other commodities now days, so II
you don't mind, why when this guy
comes up there don't pitch him any
thing that he can lay his bat against
1t, but roll the ball up there on the
ground and I'll take the cOnse-
quences." SO Tommy said: Eyes,
SIR"
Well, they started this game In
the first inning and the White Sox
didn't do nothing, and 1t come the
New York's turn to get their Innings
and there was l out and KOenlg got
on 1st base and along came Ruth.
The next thing l seen of that 2 dol
lar ball was when it was floating
over the right field bleachers. SO
when Tommy cam into the bench
Mgr. Schalk says what did tell you
and Tommy says | didn't mean to
pitch 1t where 1t went.
SO the next time Babe come up all
he got was a 8 base hit because
they were pitching more carefully to
him. Well, after a vile 1t become
necessary 10 put In a pinch hitter
for Tommy and Red Faber was sent
in to finish the game. Mgr. Schalk
didn't tell Red where TO pitch to
Babe because Reds what you might
call an old timer, so Red pitched one
at this birds Adams apple and he
hit 1t into the right field stands for
another homer, as | have nlcknamed
them.
Now this isn't no reflection on
neither OF these pitchers witch | hope
Is both friends Of mine, but II | was
managing a ball club In the American
league, / would tell them how to
pitch to this bird. | would stand on
the mound and throw the first ball to
first base and the seco. d ball to Sec
ond base and the third ball to third
! base and then ! would heave the
fourth one out In the right field.
because he couldn't be In all those
places ut once and furthermore,
they's a rule that makes a batter
stand In the batter's box and II a
person pitches In that direction with
this guy up why all you can say
about them Is that they are a sucker.
For inst. the last time the White
S0x was here a certain prominent
Chicago baseball writer was setting
next to Col. Rupert that owns the
Yanks, and this Geo. Ruth comes up
and the brewery king says to him.
how much will you bet that he don't
crack one out of the park on this
!! occasion. So the baseball writer says
what's the proper odds7 SO Jake
says. we'll l don't want to cheat you
and I'll bet a pit to a at. that ne
murders one. SO the sucker took 1t
and the first ball was a foul that
went into Mr.. McCurdy's IT,, and the
; next was a ball and then the old boy
took one right over the middle for
another strike and the next one
hasn't yet been located, but when
last seen It was sorelng owe a Gig
arctic sign In right center.
Another way to make him stop hit
ting home run of Of you is to refuse
+; to pitch when It's his turn.
/ The most useless thing in the world
when this guys up there to bat is
the opposelng catcher, because If you
can throw a ball past Mr.. Ruth why
It don't make no difference II it's
catched or not, where as II you try
and throw n over the plate 1t won't
never get as far as the catcher.
Once q guy came here with the
st. Louis Browns and struck the
Babe out three times In one after
noon, and II he Is smart he will let