Brownsville herald. [volume] (Brownsville, Tex.) 1910-current, 1930-05-02
The Once Over
sUBBTNG FOR MR. FLOYD GIBBONS

Copyright. 1880. by The Associated Newspapers

Copyright, 1890, by The Associated Newspapers)
Gas 1t seemed to the author, who recently pinched
hit on the Literary Digest radio program)
McGregor "a radio corporation guard or some
thing: We'll, how do you feel?
Substitute: I feel limp all over. I've got a cold
Ills this the room? How are your What time
Is it?
McGregor: Cheer UP. There's nothing to worry
about. No, they're using the studio now. It's down
the hall. I'm well. It's $50.
Substitutes: What do I do? Am I supposed TO
talk loud or fast or slow or what7
McGregor: Just talk as II you were In q room chat
ting with three or four friends.
Substitute (forlornly): After the broadcast I won't
have three or four friends. P~hew-w-w. Are you hot?
McGregor: No. 7 thought it was cool in here.
Substitutes: I'm burning up. .Ldssen-Give me
some directions SO 1 won't flop. How close do I get
to the mixer. DO I stand or sit DOWN.. :. Where
did you say the room WASP. ~. How do you pronounce
Buenos Aires?
McGregor: Just be natural. Think that you're
talking over the telephone. You can sit down If you
want. The room is down the hall. Just say South
America.
Substitutes: How much time have I got now?....
How do We know when TO go?
McG.egor: They'll come and get you in about ten
minutes now.
Substitute: A regular escort, I suppose. One on
each side and one in front and behind me. Gotta
match?
McGregor: Yes.
Substitute: Never mind ~ don't smoke. TIA.
just as II I was talking to a group OF friends. Ell?
McGregor: Yes. Your natural voice. You know
what your natural voice is. don't you?
Substitute: I did until this thing came up.
McGregor: If you could get a little chuckle into
it. it would be nice, you know.
Substitute lin real alarm: A chuckle?
McGregor: Yeh. A chuckle is always good. Let's
hear you chuckle.
The substitute tries to chuckle)
McGregoe: Not like that. That's a cackle. They'd
think you had laid an egg. Better not try it.
Mccregor tas two mysterious figures enter: About
two minutes now. You'd better get ready.
Substitute: Any word from the governor?
McGregor: What governor?
Substitute: Any governor. Have the boys got all
that stuff about eating a hearty meal Of roast beef,
mashed potatoes, green peas and four coups OF cof-
fee?
McGregor: Come on. It's time to 90 now.
Substitute very pale but trying to seem game
Natural voice no need to shout try to chuckle
... imagine I'm talking 70 three or four friends.
CThe door is thrown open. Mr.. McGregor leads the
way. Two other radio men fall in behind. There IS
a tramp-tramp-tram Of feet down a narrow corri-
dor 70 a door which opens into the broadcasting room.
It is a small, bare. gloomy room. The substitute looks
about nervously)
Substitute: NcGregor!
McCregor: No. What?
Substitute: Shouldn't my head be shaved2
McGregor: Now brace UP. You look scared stiff.
Snap into II when you see the light flash. Natural
voice. A little expression
Substitute Gin a far away inexpressibly sad voice.:
Where's the accent in Boise, CoL?....How do you
pronounce ChiIlicothe? 80. Where am I?
Voice Of Announcer Preaching substitute vaguely:
Ladies and gentlemen, you are about to listen to that
merry fellow, that Jolly newspaperman. that gay
splrited light hearted devil-may-care writer whose
articles bring smiles to millions OF people, &c, &c.