New Britain herald., 1930-08-02

corn on the other side, shoot 1t over with Big Bertha. or use one of Dr. Goddard's rockets
 If confronted with the course of lectures yoI propose, on Manchurian cooking, I would think hastily back to the last dish of chop suey l had in a Chinese restaurant, recall the stories of birds nest soup and other Chinese delicacies, and rule against it."
 And then, concerning the ques- tions that follow, the Observer would answer them in order
 The questions:
 If you owned the following items, set down the approximate price in dollars and cents for which you would sell them, and the sort of pur- chaser you would select:
 a)-Ford coupe which has run 5000 miles.
 (b)-Basic patent which will re- duce the cost of manufacturing shoes 20 cents a pair.
 (c)-Secret process of manufac- turing a drug which will definitely cure cancer.
 (d)-Ten acres of land in a good farming section of Iowa.
 (e)-Trade information which will enable one competitive firm to take s1,0o0,0O0 worth of net profits away from another.
 f)-The secret of a new poison gas which will make any nation su- preme in war.
 (g)-Definite proof that the dis honesty of any employe is costing a n.ulti-millionaire s200,000 a year.
 Answers:
 (a)-I would set the speedome eter back to 500 miles, with the aid of the motor of an electric drill. even as it is done in New Britain garages, take the Ford out, and sell it for $500 or as near that sum as I could get.
 (b)-I would sell the basic patent that reduces the cost of making shoes to the highest bidder, take the money and give it to Yale university, | " HIGH SO SdulN IlttuS LII tIltl tll- dowments. Then, after accepting my doctor of philosophy degree (honor- ary) at the next commencement, l would retire to my hunting lodge in the Adirondacks in search of fur ther secrets.
 (c)-Secret processes for making drugs that will cure cancer sound rather quackish. Tom. I would sus- pect that you were kidding me If I didn't know that you are really in earnest about this thing. All I can say is that if I had such a drug would not expect the American l Medical society to accept it as genu- inc and would be little surprised l to be branded q fakir.
 (d)-If the 10 acres of land in Iowa are near a small town l would not sell the property at all. but would put up a filling station on one section, a practice golf range on an- l other, and raise gophers (not golf | ers) on the rest.
 (e)-With trade information that would enable one firm to gyp anoth- CT out of s1.000,o0O in net profits within a year in my possession, l would become a captain. or at least d first mate, of big business and get myself elected to a few director | ships.
 | f-The secret of a new poison gas that would make any nation su- | preme in time of war I would get | rid of as quickly as possible, by l the fire route, fully expecting that a masked man would jump from the l shadows to grab it if 1 didn't My reason for doing this is that I have read too many lurid detective stories l recently. and know from them that would never get to Washington with | the formula
 1 (g)-Deinite proof that an en- | ploye is getting away with S200, 900 year from millionaire would prompt me to immediately in | form him of that fact. l would ex- | peCt to get a very courteous letter 1 of thanks, a box of two-for- fifteen cigars, and a job as clerk in the millionaire's factory, At the end of 50 years service with him I presume l would be presented a beautiful | rolled gold pin, indicating that I | belonged to the Half Century Loyal Workers club"
 Last, but not least. if view of the fact that the examination got under way half an hour late, the Observ- CT would remind Mir. Edison. in a note at the bottom of the examina- tion paper, that punctuality is very essential in the struggling young business man and scientist.
 Here's An Endurance
 Contest With Merit
 These endurance contests are now all the rage and have temporarily taken the place of playing Tom Thumb golf and watching steam shovels as occupations of those otherwise idle. Tree sitting, kite flying. bicycle-riding, and who knows all else all have their devotees as American youth seeks some way of passing the summer months. If they had been kept after school for 5 minutes these tree sitters would have complained loudly about the severity of their teacher, but they are willing to confine themselves to a tree limb and call it great sport. You can't beat human nature.
 Just why this tree sitting. any, way? Evolution is now admitted to be true, and experimental proof of