Brownsville herald. [volume] (Brownsville, Tex.) 1910-current, 1930-04-24
The Once Over
WAR UNDER THE NAVAL HOLIDAY TREATY
TME-ABOUT 1886.

NOTE FROM A TO POWER B
This is to notify you that we consider a state Of
war exists between US. We have given your Ambas-
sador his papers
POWER B II POWER A.
Declaration or war received and placed on file.
When do you propose to fight itP
w A TO b.
Prefer to begin Immediately.
w B TO POWER A.
Impossible to begin immediately, as YOU very Wen
know. VIII require six years.
POWER A TO POWER B.
Six years seems quite a long time to wait for a war
upon which We have set our hearts. Why do you
ask it?
POWER B TO PowER A.
Under London Naval Holiday agreement, have let
navy to to dogs for last six years. VIII consequently
need six years to build navy for adequate struggle.
POWER A TO POwER B.
Do you seriously mean that you observed the Naval
Holiday to the letter?
POWER b TO POWER A.
Absolutely. Are we wrong In assuming you did the
same?
POWER A TO POWER B.
This is a war. not an Edison QUESTIONABLE. What
ships viii you need six years to build, if we are not
too inquisitive?
POWER B TO POWER A.
-Four battleships, ten light cruisers, fourteen de-
%stroyers. And don't blame us for keeping you wait
ing. III IL naont peen Tor your old naval holiday pact
we would have had everything ready.
POWER A TO 3.
Really can't wait six years for our war. Cabinet
wants to be considerable as possible, but feels six years
delay excessive. Last time we postponed a war that
long we forgot all about it. Public never forgave US.
Are you receptive TO a proposition?
POWER 3 TO POWER a.
Shoot US the proposition.
POWER A TO POWER B.
III Won viii consent IN war IN three vears instead ~
six we will loan you enough ships to establish fighting
parity.
POWER B TO POWER A.
Split the difference. Make II four years and we
will try our best to get into condition to fight you.
POWER A TO POWER Z.
-Four years then. We want nothing to happen In
this war that would embarrass London conference.
POWER B TO OWE A.
One more detail. IN our belief world peace would
never be disturbed again, we strapped all our adj
mirals.
POWER A TO POWER B.
That's all right. Wen let you have some Of our
admirals.
AND WHY NOT?
+. p. A. wants to know II under the merger Floyd
Gibbons will be merged with Graham McNamee and
Amos and Andy. Probably. the new combine to op-
crate as the Gibamos a. McAndy Fresh Air Taxi
Company.
And some Of the radio programs will, Of course, be
split four or five for one.
After a man has appeared before a Senate COM
mittee he can certainly say he has been insulted by
experts.
Add SMILES: AS helpless as a Literary Digest ed
itor who never was very quick at figures.
The Naval disarmament delegates are packing UP
to return to the United States, but they have been
away so long that they may be detained at Ellis Is
land as immigrants.
The next step Is 10 submit the limitations treaty
to the Senate where IL will be scrambled, reshuffled,
made more battling than ever and then blamed on
the League for the Repeal Of Prohibition by Mr.. Cara
way.
A scientist now advances tho theory that time flows
two ways, and that tomorrow may be day before yes
terday or vice versa. Most of us have days when We
feel that way.
Time, according 10 this man. flows I'm a manner OF
s~peaking) both east and west. Probably the reason
life seems so uneventful Just now Is that the east and
west time has stopped on signal to let the north and
| south traffic pass.
co RI Abor,