The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1930-03-25
Hee-Haz0
1t Was Mules First, Then
the Men, According
to A. E. F. Rules.
A T sea It's wom1e1 and chill

and then the men. That's the
amusing angle brought ont IN
the first of the doughbuy
yarns spun in todGy's World
aOGr story contest being con-
Quoted By The Times.
First prize for the best story
printed during the week is $40 and
second Is IS. Get your yarn in now,
making il short. The Times IS
printing all these stories for which
space can be found
Prize winners for last week will be
announced in Wednesdays Times.
Ernest II. Shields, r. r. 6,
Bloomington, Ind, HeddqUdr-
ters Company, Twentieth
Field artillery, tells the first
one:
CTRICT orders we're always to put
~ gas masks on the animals before
donning our own. Shortly after one
offensive started. one weary mule
skinner. having reached his desti-
nation near the front, tried to get
some sleep. He couldn't return, any
way. for traffic was yet in a jam
Gas alarms sounded throughout
the night, but little gas ever reached
the w. NJ. S. and. tired of so many
false alarms, he at last fell asleep.
The supply officer came along
about the time another gas alarm
sounded. and knowing the mule
skinner was some place near, called
out, Brown, have you got masks
on those animals?"
No answer. Again, and louder,
Brown, have you got masks on
those animalS?"
The answer we heard was long
drawn and full of disgust. Gas
masks. h! I haint even got my
boots on yet"
Fl. L. Harper. 116 North
Senate GUenue, private Thir-
fu-sinth engineers, enjoyed
this one on the "LOoie":
ATONE Of the misery outside and
~ at the life saving station both
cred those in the Office Of Company
G. Thity-Sixth engineers. Lieuten-
ant McCotter, company commander,
was reading some reports on his
desk. A buck private farther back
in the building was making a brave
effort to play Home Sweet Home
on a fiddle that had two strings
missing.
Sergeant SchaeFer, company clerk
and office mansr YES sitting close
TO a stove in IT,, flee reading the
latest issue of the Stars and Stripes
"a. E. F. newspaper and trying to
smoke a f1reproof cigar. He stopped
reading and said: Lieutenant, here
Is some news. The head cook at this
camp has been awarded the D. S.
G. for feeding the American soldiers
that have passed through Brest
What do you say about that?"
We'll, WE'LL" remarked the lieu
tenant. ITO think was at West
Point four years and I am a soldier
without D. S. c. TO show my
friends end neighbors when I get
back home. I wish had learned to
cook"
The bnponet almost got
him, but Henry Friedman,
8S7 North Sherman driUe,
came through unscathed to re-
late his experience:
a FTER two weeks at Camp Up
N Won, New York, set sail for
France, only to land at Liverpool,
where the troops were marched to
Camp Knotty Ash, some two miles
out Of town.
This camp was incloSed by high
fences and well sentried, with strict
orders that no thoroughgoing
troops be given leave of camp, to
prevent losing Stragglers before
reaching France. But strict con-
fnement to ship and camp were I'M
nerving, and I, for one, was resolved
to see Liverpool before leaving for
France.
One day, after getting the lay of
the land, I discovered the sergeant
of the guard on duty happened to
belong to- my fraternity. so We
worked out scheme At dusk, be-
tween to s, my buddy and
would scale the fence at post No. 6,
which sentry was fixed. Our return
was to be at the same post between
u and p. m 1 was to whistle
thrice as a notice TO our sentry that
IL was us returning. He was TO
whistle back acknowledgment.
At the fixed hour We scaled the
fence Our getaway was perfect.
Well. Tubby and I unanswered
about town and met up with two
Scotch chorines in a music hall. We
ate and Tubby suggested going
places. The two chorines assented
and asked us to wait while they
cleaned up bit at their hotel.
Tubby and I were good walters,
but our time being limited We final
" gave them up. and after few
drinks We went back 10 camp.
I whistled thrice, then again and
again. but no response. Then Tubby
and I decided our sentry had taken
a nap. We scaled the wall. No
sooner had We landed than a sentry,
with drawn hayonet, sprang up in
front of us, shouting. Halt Who's
there?"
"Sh-sh-it's us" advancing a