Evening star., 1930-12-14
ELECTION PAROD|ED-
BY GRIDIRON CLUB
FeSS Pictured as Napoleon,
AStride Steed, VoIStead,
in Skit at Dinner.
Continued From First Page.l


Elections over; now we should not
hate: =
In love instead we should cooperate
We Democrats are always so romantic
30 full of high ideals and applesauce.
And 1, as Romeo Robinson, lead the way
TO love the G. o. p, though Glass in
ststs
For victory we shan't apologies.
BY patty ties he still would have US
bound:
He jests ct scars that never felt a
But why should we see darkly through
a Glass?"
Another spotlight disclosed Juliet
son:
"Oh, Joe, this is so sudden.
Cooperation is the very thing.
know my Uncle Herbert loves the
word,
And Robinson's perfect Romeo.
o Romeo, Romeo, wherefore art thou
Democrat?
Deny thy party and refuse thy name,
And will, too, for I'll Cooperate.
If thouTl no longer be a Democrat,
Then I'll no longer be G. o. P.
To think that Democrats will follow me,
When men Of my own party never
would"
Hamlet B0rah Enters.
But Hamlet Borah entered to spoil
the billing and cooing of these lovers.
Romeo Robinson chided Hamlet Borah
Tor being "in the wrong act" and Ham
let BoTah answered
"I hate both your parties, I suspect
You both. A plague o. both your houses.
hate everybody
will not let you two cooperate.
I'll end this foolish talk Of love. Now
listen
which one Of you expects to organize
The new Senator Just answer tllatl
Heb, heh, hehl"
immediately there was strife between
Romeo Robinson and Juliet Watson,
both claiming they would organize the
next Senate. And Hamlet declared:
There goes your co-operationI
There 60 your Romeo and Julietl
How silly to expect they'd love each
Who wants peace, anyway? Not I, for
one.
Let us have war, say I.
Insurgents thrive upon It, and it helps
To keep ones name in the headlines
Lay on, Jim! Lay on, Joel Make it
rough,
And damn,d Be J he y that nrst cries,
A benefit performance was given for
the relief Of the unemployed lame
ducks" Of Congress. young lady
named Miss Prosperity, but clad In rags,
with q sweet soprano voice, came for
ward and offered 10 sing for the benefit,
but her services were rejected after It
was discovered that she had developed
. most annoying lisp which caused her
70 pronounce her name Myth Pros
peF1ty." Walter Newton Of the White
House secretar1at decided that the only
way 70 provide Jobs for the lame ducks
would Be to throw out the army Of
paEiots who gave up stupendods
earve the country Ia the early DAYS of
TIE Hoover administration.
The venerable cclored tonsorial artist
the Senate barber shop, with Sen
eece SLnoot in the chair getting O shave.
Amentea the passing Of wlaisWers from
public lie but cheered up when he
learned that J. Ham Lewis was coming
In Q brilliant corunataon sxtraya-
gAnzA Charles Mohaelson, publicity di-
rector Of the Democratic National Com
n1ittee, was crowned king Bunko, the
Bambardier Of BlAh, Originator and
Grand DeviSor Of the Synthetic Inter.
view. and the Maharajah Of Mfnneo-
graph"
Revolt Trend Pictured.
A Spectacis Of vivid oolorine Ana
t1neftl music depicted the revoiutaon-
ery trend throughout the world. Revo-
utlonists from Latin America, Ger
many, Russia, China and the United
States assembled. When Representative
Hamilton Fish, chairman Of the Con.
greSsional Committee Investigating
Radical Activities, arrived the chief
- ~ -T..Aa- -
thanked him for his services in behalf
Of their cause.
Just as the guests took their seats A
terrific crash Of falling dishes and
glassware echoed through the banquet
hall. AS the startled guests looked
about for the cause a member rushed
Forward and President Charles G.
Groves Of the Boston Globe demanded:
What Is all that noise aboutp"
"Oh, that Is only the American voter
vember 4"
A bugle called, darkness fell upon the
banquet hall, colored lights flooded the
soage and out through the din and
smoke Of battle galloped Marshals Nsv
Nay Moses and Grouchy wood on their
Wooden horses. Both were equipped
with binoculars.
Here we are on the field of Water
100. said Marshal Wood
Yes. Marshal Wood" replied Mar
Snai Moses. history will remember the
patele OF waterloo, November 4, 1890"
Napoleon Fess astride his sailant
charger, Volstead, rode upon the field.
Whoa, Volsteadi Whoa, Volsteadl I"
he exclaimed as the steed plunged and
rSered at the noise Of the battle
6tnl riding the same old horse"
commented Marshal Moses,
How goes the battle, my gallant
Gr1FHT91 yfHnTmgb SVGt,t-~A
Reports Made to Napoleon.
II hate to tell you. Napoleon" replied
Marshal Moses. You may have come
nom yellow Springs, but you're going
The two marshaIs focused their
binoculars and began reporting to Ma
poaeon the progress Of the conflict.
Sour maiesty'S troops are falling
back In Massachusetts, said Marshal
Moses Heavens. they are following
tlae wrong ,coolidgel"
Eoh Calvin! Calvin!" moaned Ma
pqleon. What profiteth it to have faith
u .a .MaaSsacnusetts and get two Demo-
marshal Wood scanned the horizon in
-'Ah. my native Ohio" inquired ress
e4gerly, How are its rocks and riils5"
Iheyve gone for rock and rye," an
nkunced Marshal Wood.
rs the battle raging In Indiana3"
asked Fess.
looking through his binoculars. Mar
kAal Moses replied:
f'Oh, the moons behind cloud along
Tue wabash, for the Democrsts ars
making all the hay, in the sycafnores
t9e @. o. P. Is hiding. on the banks of
the Wabash hells to pay
Marshal Moses reported that in New
YORK the enemy outnumbers us TOO.