New Britain herald., 1930-02-15
If You've Ever Had Cold lou'il Find Your Type Here


 We thought that in past winters we had been the victim of a large number of colds, but now we find . that we were almost free from these attlictiOns, for never can we rcmcm- hcr having been go constantly II the clutches Of the ChlIs anl Snoczes as this season. If hy any chance we did have many in tine past We are confident that this Wiu- fer We have set new worlds reg ord, and we are considering writ ing to the American Medical As5n. to have the new mark rccognz1i ] d. official,
 The doctors may know q lot about colds from observation, study auI experimentation, but We know four times as much from actual cXpcri- cncc. We nave had so many colds 1 at we have even been able to separate them into classes and here are at least majority of the | varieties:
 First there Is the snifflcs This is l very minor Hs colds go but ncvor- i theloss is diseomfortng and cm- ] Earrassing.
 Next. though really an aG@rava- tion Of the first class, is the real i cold in the nose. This sends you into fits of sneezing at just the wrong moments, and your nose grows 1"t and your eyes Watery until NoU look like the latest drunk" picked off the curb by the night patrol.
 Proceeding downward, We conc to the throat cold, This produces il tickling, irritating sensation in the gUltct and makes you turn your tongue inside out trying to scratch it, but you never succeed and the failure causes fits of high pitched, hacking hiccOughs which may maj. Q your. cnVious friends think you have just had q "shOt' of something. The effect on the voice is also very dis concerning. unless you happen to be a yodclcr.
 Going still lower we find the chest cold. Ths again is distingulsh- cd by coughing, but here it is of a booming, sepulchral type WhiCH drives your friends 10 seek GOV, r and, after they have safely hdd Fl under tables and behind desks, to make remarks about seeking War.n- c" climCs (but not in the next NOrld) as il means of WHrding of TT. R." Which Is very comforting
 Another localized brand is that which causes neuralgia or ncurIti, iu the face. As this article is intend cd 10 be at least slightly humorous We will pass over this type, as nc humorst m the world could cyG' sec anything funny in ncuritis Summing up all these is the grU cold. with @Il its attendant chjlls fever, aching backs and heads, ho water bottles, AoHtrlms and doctors
 eve were going to add "prE;crip. tions' but feel we had better with
 hold any references to Hlcoholi' beverages for fear they will undul, influence the committee hearings ', now being held in Washington : T here is one good feature of thi
 sort of cold, anyway. for when Nor
 are in the grip of the grippe yO' can safely lie abed, forget the work
 aday woes of the world, and try t'
 catch up on the sleep you los = while laboring overtime or maxim, :, Whoopce.
 , But worst of all is the obnoNiou . kind of cold which, like the gripr
 cold. settles all over you but dou
 not hold with enough effect 10 ron
 der you horS de combat. Again VOL , head aches, your joints Crcak. you Il back feels broken, and you are al t t,rnatClN sweating and ShivCrint '' but the symptoms are not upparC l - and nobody will believe Nou if No r. tell them how i'll you feel, No H drag Iour feet slowly about NoH y place Of cmploymcnl, unable |
 move rapidly, think CapaDly, or |"
 anything satisfactorily, and all th v while you know that the boss, |c, | ing only these effects and uothlu ,f else, merely thinks you are begin = ulng to "slip' and that it is tine e he hired a live young man 10 fl iJ your place.