The Washington times., 1930-09-25
for
LODeLOrn
Youth
BY Beatrice Fairfax
An Authority on Problems Of
Love and Marriage

AAVNC sNAA~N
Is true love a thing Of tenn
pests and whirlwinds, only?
Is romance always born "at
first sight" and is ii hours SUI.
ficient time for Jack and jill
to meet, love, become convinced
that they were made for each
other and swear eternal faith
fulneSS?
There have always been love
stories Of this sort and there
always will be. Love at first
sight is a reality. But 1t isn't
the only reality. There are
other kinds of love.
Rosebud M, is a 20-year-old
friend of mine, is eager to
know the truth about this very
matter.
Il will not marry without
love-" she declares-and ap-
plaud her for it.
"A man six years older than
I, has taken me about for six
months or so. He is very much
in love with me and has pro-
posed m arriag repeatedly.
When I say I do not love him,
he asks me to wait six months
or a year, before I make my
final decision. His idea is that
when we know each other pet
ter I may come to love him.
"1t is true that I admire him
and am even fond of him. But
If / go a week without seeing
him, it doesn't matter to me.
Where is all the heavenly eX-
citement that love brings and
that friendship doesn't? And
isn't it foolish to suppose that
I should feel different in six
months? I simply do not love
him, nice as he is. Shouldn't
that end it?"
My feeling is that Rosebud
Is too positive. Young people
nowadays don't like to wait or
delay-even for love. They
like sudden love, speedy ro-
nance. They have a horror of
what seems indecision. It
seems sentimental to them to
dawdle about, as they put it,
for month or a year. wait
ing for romance to come into
being. You love a person or
you don't, they say. Your love
affair is ION" or it is off" A
satisfactory love-Story must be
intense, but, from their point
of view, it must also be snappy.
I want, however, to put in
word for the young man whom
Rosebud Is too eager to reject.
/ agree with him that love can
happen in more ways than one.
And I should say it was more
than possible that if this inn
patient girl can persuade ner-
self to wait six months more,
she may find that something
very wonderful has happened.
Sometimes friendship is the
cool, sweet flower, and love the
precious golden fruit that must
AdNC b1AI1C VI 1IPCIl.
Or, sometimes, after months
or even years of association,
love flames into being without
an instant's warning.
The. man whom you have
merely liked, performs some act
OF tenderness or unSelfiShneSS
that shows what he really is.
For the first time, you under
stand him. Your obstinate cold
ness is melted in a flash. Love
rushes into your unresisting
heart and overflows it
Can this be the same man
who, week ago, was a friend
only? Now he is your universe.
And your life has become a par
adiSe.
And this is a state of things
SO desirable that you will admit
It's worth waiting for.
Give love chance, is the
advice I have for girls like
Rosebud, who have formed the
habit of being in a breathless
hurry about everything
about love.
1t may be thrilling to fall in
love with a perfect stranger,
but it's also rash.
Understand each other first,
and love afterward.
Thereu be a good chance,
In that case that love willO last.
And that marriage, based on it
will be the real success that all
marriages ought to be.