Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1930-02-11

, to be SO terribly well bred. Yet I'M
mercifully we give ourselves away
We sneeze right out.
y X X
The man or woman who sneezed
upon another, and especially upon a
stranger, is boor of the worst sort.
The family Sneeze is something else
again. One knows the sort of oral NV
giene the sneeSer INDUCES in, one knows
the brand of tooth paste he uses and
the food he eats.
Such sneeze, while nothing to brag
about, is little personal matter Just
between enc and one. 1t may be for
given.
The strange sneeze, however, is an
atrocious thing. He who gets sneezed
upon cannot help specializing immedi-
ately upon all the diseases in the med
ical books.
Out of the corner of an eve the
sneezer is inspected. Yes, the fellow
lookS-well, it is to be hoped he doesn't.
or hasn't, as the case may be.
One sees the millions of cold germs
spreading out in concentric circles, in
creasing rapidly as they go, multiplying
with compound interest at every ilimp.
The particles of air are fairly clopgecl
with germs, which fight one another
furtously in order to get to that most
desired OF placeS-one's own mouth and
nose passages.
No doubt they are circling around,
trying to find the right place. All. they
have keen noses, those rascally little
germs! Here come a billion or two,
madly wing with one another to be first
in the best old nose in the world.
y 4 X 4
No sooner has this grand alarm been
quieted, by the deft combination of an
elevated handkerchief and the most OBJ
timistic hopes, than the assault begins
from the right.
The old gentleman who looks at all
the ladies' as they come down the aisle
is beginning TO turn his head again. He
is looking maliciouSly at that handker-
chief held nose-high.
He resepts that handkerchief. What
right has any one to protect himself
against the i'll breeding of others in
public places? 1t is their right to do
as they please, in this best of all pos
sible worlds; If they please to sneeze
on you, you must submit without the
batting OF an eye-or the elevation of
a handkerchief.
You know that he is waiting for you
TO take the protection down, in order
that he may slip in twenty billion
BU peloIS you can get 1t back up
again. You know this, and vet YOU
wilt. He seems so terribly insulted-
mayhap he will not Sneeze, after all,
II you lower the screen for a time.
Ker-chew!
With cries of joy the germs fly 3
feet with the speed of light. The
hastily averted head, the updrawn
handkerchief, block approximately
5,000,000,000 OF them, but full 10000
100000 get through.
They say that one cannot possibly
count that many of anything in ten
lifetimeS, but unhappily one does not
have to count them. They arrive in
masses, and the psychology of the
crowd is queer, strange, outrageous.
Germs cling lovingly TO germs, as they
pour in great streams adown your warm
eSophagus.
Between the girls who giggle at the
wrong time and the SneezerS who are
at 1t from time to time, perfectly
good play and an otherwise delightful
evening is in process of being spoiled.
Yes, we agree with our correspondent
that something ought to be done about
1t, but until some courageous manager
arises to eject all patrons who sneeze,
we do not know what can be done. 1t
is relief, however, to write what one
thinks about such unthinking people,
and we hope that fellow sufferers get
some pleasure In reading about them.