The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1930-01-23
Where, Why, and How?

Where, Why, and How?
Just how, when, where and why !
write this stuff has been asked so
many times that 1 am going to break
down and answer it, not that it mat
tiers particularly, but because I hav-
emit anything else to write about.
To begin with, the boss editor or
ders this stuff for Monday because it
is a slow day, usually very little news.
and he wants to keep the linotype go
ing. So 1 start thinking, if that is
possible, but over the weekend a lot
of papers and magazines come into
the Office and 1 must look them over
By Tuesday morning the boss is pref
ty sore so 1 face the Underwood.
After two hours I jump up for a
visit to Col. Bell to see if he has any
ideas. He pulls a couple of old gags
and several chestnuts, and between
the two of US we decide that some
thin ought to be done to create stir
My next trip is to Harned's drug
store, but the Amalgamated Society
for the Prevention of Work is always
in session and after listening a few
minutes to quaint sayings of Amos
and Andy the boss usually appears
and orders me up to the office. In
stead l head for Gonder's confection-
cry where Harry Stemple usually has
an idea (I'm not saying what kindly
After a rather fruitless search re-
turn to the office.
It is now Tuesday afternoon so
gaze out the front window, and you'd
never dream of all the things that GO
on on Oakland's main street. The
hourly exclamation, "Hey, where's
some copy?" brings me to my senses
but it is now quitting time. So when
Wednesday morning comes around
have to really get down to work
There't that contest about the bath
tub that I got started the other week
and have to end it some way and
name a winner.
Turk Shartzer said I entered him
in the contest just so he would get
started in using bathtubs, but he said
it was too late, he never would get
used to it.
Once in awhile somebody runs into
the office with a good idea; just as
often somebody else runs in with a
bad one; they think Scoop is the gar
bage wagon of the newspaper copy
and want him to write on anything
and everything.
h About the time I get my mind made
up to write on one subject, something
comes along to bother me. So when
Wednesday morning comes and am
still tearing around looking for ideas
it is no wonder that the contents OF
Scoop are what they are.
H**
Another subscriber complimented
me today by telling me he enjoyed
last weeks column so much. But (oh
yes 1 forgot) he ruined it by telling
me he had been sick in bed all
week and it was all he had to read
I've read catalogs under like circum-
stances and enjoyed it.
I said "another subscriber" because
Il have had a great number say they
enjoy Scoop. don't see how they
could, myself, but that's not my look
out. Maybe this column is the cause
of the continued and steady increase
in the subscription list of The Re-
publican. 1t now has the largest cir
culation in Garrett county.
Charges of driving a sled without q
license, passing beneath red light
and maybe overlooking, were almost
preferred by Officer B. B. against
three young women, Mog-Mart-
and-Ed, on Tuesday night when Their
coasting activities came to a climax
at the corner of Second and Liberty
streets, just beneath red traffic light
, and the watchful eye of the town
police force.
"Move on; you're all old enough tc
know BETTER" the, officer ordered. And
three surprised and shocked damsels
faded out of the picture.
Gee, I've written almost enough fol
this week, and still the bathtub con-
test hasn't been disposed of. Let's
hold it off a week longer and see il
The Republican readers will not send
in solution to the problem. Who is
to win? Who is the best bathtuh
warbler of Oakland?
Address all answers to Inspector
James Kerins, bathtub contest. Oak
land, and see the results next week
in Scoops column.
Oh yes, before stop, must cor
rect the error that Miss Jane Harvey
married Mrs. Humbertson, as stated
last week on page 1. That extra So
on Mr.. slipped in somehow. She's
married all right, but to MR.. Arthur