Brownsville herald. [volume] (Brownsville, Tex.) 1910-current, 1929-09-03
The Once Over

By Il. Z. PHILLIPS

Labor Day, 5 .. m-Loading Of t1ivver preparatory
to take-off for home Is now under way. Proceedings
complicated by problem OF how to get six people. o
dog, four s~uitcases. an cupboard motor. q ranoe, three
golf bags, a photograph, two boxes OF dishes and sev-
eral baskets containing cooking utensils. electric Tat
irons, etc, ETC.. into a car designed for four people
and an overnight bag. A delay seems probable.
~5:30-violent verbal storm raging over question
whether It is better to put mother. children and dog
into car first and stow luggage around them or put
luggage In first and stow mother. children and dog
around them. All hope OF a hop-off by 6 p. m. now
abandoned.
5:45-Prcblem solved by decision to throw passen-
gers and baggage into car simultaneously.
5:55-Mutiny aboard. Mother fatty refuses to
make entire trip holding Juniors cupboard motor IN
her lap.
s. r. ms. o. 6. Hop-off now seems likely any
moment.
6:ls-Flight delayed due to Juniors difficulty
tying canoe to top OF car wit hold rlothesline. Junior
proposes tying mother and the baby on top Of rar md
slowing canoe inside where IL win be rafe.
e:2o-Hop-off now being attempted
6:25-Hop-off held up. Mother suddenly an
nounces she forgot to pack fathers blue business sun.
6:3o-Blue suit. vacuum-cleaner and box-lunch
now aboard okay. Everything ready. We have taken
off for home at last.
e:45-Homeward flight of the vacation flivver
northumberland" interrupted. Father recalls he
left his keys on cottage table. Return necessary.
7:l5-Fiight under way again with everybody very
Sour. Looks like a rough trip.
7:3o-Disaster now threatening ship. Sudden shift
OF cargo buries back-seat passengers. Mother. two
girls and dog caught under fishing-box. Suitcases,
monograph. loose kitchen equipment and golf bags
Baby's eve cut. Much hysteria. Doubt 81 we can con-
tinue.
8 .. m-Cargo righted. Passengers nearly righted.
Proceeding under half speed in very heavy traffic.
Father Is feeling the rtrain.
s:so-Flight halted BY complete traffic tie-up as
far as eye can see. Making about so yards per hour
through heavy gas clouds. Driver behind insists upon
keeping thumb on musical horn. Father wants to
know which bag his revolver Is In. Trouble s feared.
s:45-Have gained a block and q hall. Juniors
canoe slides of top Of car and drops across radiator
Or limousine behind. Great excitement. Owner rf
limousine wants Junior to pay for paint scraped of
auto. Junior wants man to pay for paint scraped of
canoe. Father takes hand in argument. Man calls
father a bum. Father calls man a sathead. Junior
In lifting canoe back onto roof OF flivver, loses control
and Il slides off and through windows Of y right
reeinc bus. knocking an ear off riddle-aged lady
asleep in her seat. The situation is alarming
o. m.-Junior yanks canoe out OF bus and tears
Off the lady's other car. Driver OF car behind TIN
blowing musical horn. Traffic tie-up now 100 per
cent perfect. BUS driver QEEhiEtluS 1a1AACA . .iaAhC TAA
address. Father too far gone TO recall either. BUS
driver shakes fist at father. Dog bites bus driver.
s:l5-Motorcycle cop comes alongside md orders
father to pull over to side Of road. Father discovers
he IS out Of gs and can't pail over.
s:20-Motorcycle cop arrests father for ignoring a
police order.
9:2l-Father bites policeman.
s:2o-Trip temporarily abandoned.
GOING UP
I'm ordering blocmers give your bust mesaure-
ments. Our bloomer sizes are based on bust measure
order house catalogue.
MY goodness, are they wearing EN- that high this
year?
Ina Dodo. back from two months nc q RUNNER
boarding house. Is refusing any really tender food
during September. IT couldn't stand an abrupt
change from the tough cuts" she explains.