davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The midland journal. (Rising Sun, Md.) 1885-1947, 1929-07-05
Where They Lacked

Mencken-Well, what did the ed
itor say of your last contribution Of
free verse?
Blencken-He was very encourage
ing. He said that my poems were
equal to Poe's except for the absence
of any rime, rythm or meaning.
The midland journal. (Rising Sun, Md.) 1885-1947, 1929-07-05
Practicinr Up

"Why do you keep riding up and
down on the elevator, MADAME"
D "My son insists that I must fly with
him, and am trying to get used to
the high attitudes"
The midland journal. (Rising Sun, Md.) 1885-1947, 1929-07-05
Notb;ng Left for the Court

Judge-Have you anything to offer
the court before sentence is passed
upon you?
Prisoner-No, yer Eonor; me lawyer
took me last dollar.
The midland journal. (Rising Sun, Md.) 1885-1947, 1929-07-05
Eama and Photosraphx

The Joy of passing Fame Is done,
For the elusive present.
Photographers man will shun
When ne cannot Look Pleasant"
The midland journal. (Rising Sun, Md.) 1885-1947, 1929-07-05
Scholarship

Are your young folks fond of
school?"
"Yes," answered Mr.. Meekton,
notwithstanding school.
ton Star.
The midland journal. (Rising Sun, Md.) 1885-1947, 1929-07-05
One NAV Well Ask

Briggs see people are living a
great deal longer than they used to.
Griggs-Well, what else is there to
do?
The midland journal. (Rising Sun, Md.) 1885-1947, 1929-07-05

Miss Dull-Don't you think Mr..
Sapp's eyes show the kind of mind
he has?
Miss Sharpe-No; Mr.. Sapp's eyes
are quite bright.
The midland journal. (Rising Sun, Md.) 1885-1947, 1929-07-05
Easy

Easy
Hawker-Buy a paper barometer,
madam, only penny each.
Lady (after buying one)-HOw
does it work?
Hawker-Just put ii on the window
sill, and when it's wet you'll know its
raining.
The midland journal. (Rising Sun, Md.) 1885-1947, 1929-07-05
T)FIIL,LIPS
= Milk
of Ma nesia

"a Little Cocky"-v
Xavier Drummer, of Niedergergheim,
Alsace, eighty-two, was a first SER
geant when Marshal Foch was re-
cruit. "He was cocky little devil"
says the sergeant. $Gf~G
The midland journal. (Rising Sun, Md.) 1885-1947, 1929-07-05
MARY Had a Little Car

Mary had a little car
TO take her eggs to market,
But she had to leave 1t ten blocks out
To find a place to park It.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1929-07-17


iS s1a'A and ''"' to take upon themselves the responsibilities
Certainly contrary
mracuosy escaped me that marriage
n eth sa tsm
plenty upon
ar. p.ny q mem vs vi DC
veins s' s In their lives does any siren ever warm
THEY bund of nature and when they
hpe Of mss%en the terms Of bills somebody
"oaa IL lace ts :ss s saa @ @ a
woman because no man is harder to
h ae ns p aBs .gna s.:
analysis dmnr wSS W TOO hot on oo
e fhe "e there usn accidental b S who never marie. bs,. he
men who really Cherish mot omam ny ppsefy % snd
girls that fill eyes
% @ hs paso a HsH D SS
by the marrying f age ne S Knows
s @ ou and ss sSs ns
his
AH0
the selfish bachelor
spend Of his money himself and to his liberty No
Himself '0 " " Gu" anu nc never really ever loves any human 0ems Out
the guest
monopoiz society away
oURSr resi- s never o0e and
bachelors
% s he nse them ST their @ die sa they
fetching n hotTater Bottles instead es5shng
o ~ ~ - N
m Most Mos b Du o Of all the who like who
had
tH
what they would like to
figure contempt Just often
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1929-07-17

|. and other things which incline to make
spots? Much of the virtue Of Summer
finery is in the fresh-looking quality
but the temptation to cucumber ones
self no more than necessary with extra
garments Is strong.
It is amazing how much protection
can be afforded by even the thinnest Of
aprons. Material SO sheer that 1t would
suggest transparency may be SUFFICIENT
to prevent damage to the gown beneath
in the ordinary course Of kitchen duty.
A very pretty apron, becoming to the
wearer, Is made of figured lawn, piped
in some bright color which occurs in
the pattern. or in gray or neutral tone.
Aprons in modernistic Mood are made
of plain, thin goods with striking COL
ored pockets appliqued. More extreme
)nes have abstract geometric motifs upon
them in contrasting shades. An excel
lent way to use up various pieces of
cotton cloth, none of them in itself
large enough for an entire apron, Is to
combine them into a square. Of which
each section is a different shade.
This should be large enough so that
when 1t is suspended by one corner,
from a position little above the waist
line of the wearer, the opposite corner
will reach to the bottom of the skirt.
Streamers from each side secure 1t
when tied In back, and the checker
board effect is very pleasing If the col
orS are well combined. This apron Is
really nothing more than large patch
work square, turned diagonally and tied.
Copyright, 1920
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1929-07-17
Good Citizens.

Good citizens we claim to be, from
vicious habits we are free, We never
are in jail, and we'd be shocked If some
one said the town will profit when
we're dead and sleeping in the vale.
We pay our taxes right on time, each
week we give the church a dime, we
walk in proper ways; our well known
sex We would adorn, we hate all crime
and look with scorn on all unrighteouS
jays. Yet Johnson keeps savage
hound that chases citizens around,
apologies he makes, but laughs until
his larynx aches, at their indignant
spiels. Jim Bingham keeps thousand
fowls and all day long he hears the
howls of men whose hearts are sore;
the hens scratch up their costly beans
and damage all the luscious greens, and
make themselves a bore. Jim Cling
ham thinks 1t quite q jest, and he
would surely be distrest If you should
intimate that he's no credit to the town,
but just a needless. thoughtless clown,
a mental featherweight. BY day Joe
Wax is mild and meek; he gives three
parties every week, and they last all
night long; his guests stand up on
chairs and yell and jar the welkin
wildly we'll with laughter and with song
And weary folk who'd like to sleep must
lie awake and cusS and weep until
their nerves are raw; and when arrives
the break of day they shake their fists
at Joe and say there ought to be
law. Thus countless people give offense
$ho think their conduct Is immense,
who'd view you with surprise if you
should say the town will be better
place in which to dree. when they have
reached the skies. WALT MASON.
1ooO(
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1929-07-17
PERSONAL HEALTH SERVICE
BY WILLIAM BRADY, M. d.

the body or in keeping comfortable in
excessive hot or humid weather Is the
evaporation Of water from the surface,
and this Is dependent not only on the
temperature and humidity Of the at
moSphere but also on the temperature
of the layer Of air surrounding and in
contact with the body. Even the Eskimo
in his furs practically lives In a tropical
climate, and every one who wears
clothes has his own private climate
next to his skin, no matter where he
lives. Under certain conditions of high
temperature and still air thin clothing
may keep one more comfortable than
nakedneSS can, by favoring evaporation
Of moisture.
Clothing in contact with the skin
should be Of absorbent material, for
comfort in extremely hot weather.
Probably the ideal material Is loose
meshed wooden for Summer underwear.
This may seem strange but it Is so.
Is the most uncomfortable material for
clothing in very hot weather.
Dark colors or black absorb more of
the heat rays of sunlight than light
colors or white, and hence white or
light colored clothing Is more comfort
able in the Summer. White reflects
much of the heat away from the body.
For cooling purposes one layer Of
heavier material Is preferable to two
layers Of the lighteSt possible material,
because q second layer of anything adds
more insulation and interferes with the
dissipation Of the body heat.
Excepting the question Of protection
against sunburn, as a general rule the
less clothing and one wears at any time
the more comfortable he will be in
extreme Summer humidity and the
healthier he will be at any time Of the
year.
Tight clothing Is necessarily hotter
than loose clothing simply because it
retains the layer of insulating air
around the skin. If the clothing Is
loose at every point Of contact ventila-
ton will contribute toward more efiici-
ent cooling. Dog day clothes should be
as soft and pliable as possible, for hard
or stiff garments tend to preserve the
insulating tropical climate around the
skin.
Gentlemen should check their waist
coats and ladies their stays II they wish
to weather the torrid spell with pleas
ant mien. I have always suspected the
reason so many people run arnuck in
the Philippines Is they insist on wear
ing cholera belts out there. Here at
home we content ourselves with corsets
or vests and just 60 around with a
crouch over the insuferable weather.
(Copyright, 1929
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1929-07-17
Everyday Psychology
BIZ DIR. JESSE W. sPRowLs.

Only the man who has actually lived
through and thought great deal about
the periods Of life as he lived them, is
really qualified to say what periodicity
means.
We all live our lives from day to day,
conscious that upon rising We are the
same individuals who only few hours
before retired to sleep! Take a little
larger unit say year at clip, and the
memory continuum may be broken into
Just noticeable sections. Take five years
at clip, and vast differences are recog-
nized. At As they are painfully felt.
Many a man at IS would give his en-
years to 30, while some men at so would
mortgage the next decade for the privi-
lege Of going back to As. The sense Of
passing time is never so acute as 1t Is
between As and so.
This consciousness Of the passing Of
time accounts for q good many attach
ments and indulgences which young
er man cannot understand. The 45-to-
50-year-old man keeps thinking that
"Vfe is too short" Consequently he
will overlook faults and shortcomings In
youth, sometimes to the actual disad-
vantage of youth. It's the beginning
of an age of humanitarianism. ones
deeper nature says: Now that the in
dividual has begun to go, what can I
do for the racer"
Somehow, every human virtue has its
vice. The man between As and so often
becomes greedy and selfish. Living as
he does under the self-engendered no
ton that the world has after all not
been quite fair to him, he may and
often does refuse to younger men the
recognition they deserve. At the same
time he will proffer unsought advice
whenever opportunity presents itself.
Perhaps the most significant char
acteristic of the mental life of the As
to-50-year-old man is his tendency to
take on so many maturities in so brief
O span Of years. It Is possible still to
teach him; he is still plastic enough
to learn. But the big thing is the sue
cessive PHILOSOPHERS that he spins. The
truly great seekers after and founders
of first principles have been men be-
tween As and so.
Copyright, 1927
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1929-07-17
Everyday Law Cases
Is RetGkino by Force Money
Lost at Gambling Robbery?
BY THE COJNSEIIOR.
BIZ THE COUNSELLOR.

Charles Smith played q game of cards
with group of acquaintance and lost
the sum of $45. In need of money,
Smith demanded that the winner re-
pay his loss. When the latter refused,
Smith grabbed him and took the money
out of his pocket. Later Smith was
arrested and was charged with robbery
for the offense.
At his trial, Smith defended himself
on the ground that as a loser in a
gambling transaction he had the right
under the law to recover his losses.
Accordingly, he commended, while he
could be charged with assault he could
not be charged with robbery as he
had merely retaken his own money.
Notwithstanding his defense, Smith
was found guilty and sentenced to five
years in the penitentiary. He then en-
tered an appeal to the higher court.
The appellate court reversed the de-
cision and dismissed Smith, stating:
by the weight of authority it is not
robbery for one who has lost money In
gambling to compel by force or threats
the return Of the money lost. In view
of statutes which give to the loser the
right to recover his losses, the retaking
thereof by force is deemed to be with
out felonious intent. A contrary rule
prevails in Texas.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1929-07-17
BRAIN TESTS

This is a test Of possibilities and
impossibilities. After reading each one
mark 1t either possible or impossible.
Allow half a minute for each.
I. A double track railroad runs from
"A to B. The tracks are side by side all
the way, yet one track is longer than
the other.
Possible }. Impossible }.
2. A man left his house and Travelled
around the world in an easterly direc-
ton. He finally arrived back at his
house.
Possible }. Impossible }.
3. A man left his house and travelled
around the world, always going to the
north. He finally reached his starting
point.
Possible { }. Impossible }.
4. An automobile has a maximum
speed of so miles an hour. It went from
New York to Philadelphia 600 miles,
over the Lincoln highway in an hour
and a half.
Possible }. Impossible { }.
5. A man left Chicago at noon and
arrived in New York at noon The next
day, making the trip In 25 hours.
Possible }. Impossible { }.
Answers to above tests:
/. Possible (the tracks could curve).
2. Possible. 8. Impossible; he would
have to travel south also. 4. Impossible:
grades and road traffic would prevent
it. s. Possible; New York time Is one
hour earlier than Chicago time.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1929-07-17
MOVIES AND MOVIE PEOPLE
BY MOLLIE MERRICK.

HOLLYWOOD. Calf, July 17-Now
comes Max Ree's horrible prediction
that brilliant colors'-purples, GRIM
sons, bright blues-will feature the
wardrobe of the well dressed man
of 1884.
Truth to tell, I've been watching the
bright colorS on Hollywood's pretty boys
for so long now that my one hope is
they'll be of On some other tootle come
1884.
Producers who live in Spanish homes
with multi-colored tile fountains, tie
pictures by Sanchez in the garden walls.
blue or violet or green or orchid tile
bathrooms, and "moderne" interiors
where citron and silver and magenta do
their work when nerves are a bit junpy,
carry on the good cause by INDUCING in
rose pink linen with the imported wool
ems that are part Of the picture.
Village ladies have gone in for color
so strenuously that no variant of the
solar spectrum has been left out of
their scheme. Their tinted heads are
waterwaved and their orange and rasp-
berry and jade green ties have blossom
ed on black, blue. red, yellow, green and
lilac shirts.
Soda fountain clerks wear apple green
SHOCKS ana QaSn up Qrlnk III sou
green glassware, while they slip pale
green paper napkin alongside.
My green grocer has taken to green
smocks with bright candy-pink collars
and cuffs. Oil station attendants are
in color schemes. So are automobiles
laundries. The "ye little olde shoppe"
movement hit this village so thoroughly
that original souls building homes here
go in for ivory in big and deliberate
way.
White bathrooms are sponsored by the
knowing, despite fascinatinglywo
booklets describing the advance in &C.
ramic art for household use. And crys-
tai glassware, ivory linens and simple
white Wedgewood china are having a
heyday with those perspicacious ones
who know when they've had enough.
Dagmar Godowsky has made a hit
In Paris with her scarlet fingernails. If
she manages to get them any redder in
the French capital than the cinema
ladies achieve, it's an accomplishment.
What's more, some Of the girls go in
for highly enameled toenails now that
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1929-07-17

Malibu and Santa Monica are in full
swing and beach sirens are the chic.
Dagmar probably learned to enamel
here.
When John Mccormack makes his
first venture into sound films he will
have an Italian. Frank Borsage, for
director. Charles Wakefield Cadman
father of American-Indian music, will
be the composer of two original songs
for the Irish tenor, and will arrange the
music for the finished work.
A test Of Mccormack, shown to a few
critics and writers of the colony re-
Gently, didn't send them out shouting.
Had they been attending music recitals
instead of movies all these years they
wouldn't have been looking so hard at
waistlineS. My training in concert halls
has taught me to listen-not look.
The recording was not up to McCor-
mack's output for talking machine use.
but the method is different and will
require little time. The tenor seemed
he has not been guilty Of in the glo-
rious past.
OF course. the curved cupids-bow lips
and beaded eyelashes donated by the
studio makeup man made Mccormack
resemble q cross between Mary Pick
ford and Davy Lee. But with the re.
cording going smoothly and the artist
in the vein there's no reason the world
shouldn't hear the great Irishman for
IS cents instead Of $3.50.
And among us movies:
Matt Moore: Love is only tnnis term
to me.
(Copyright 1929 by the North American
Newspaper Alliance
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1929-07-17

ritation from the wearing of a sanitar
pad. 1t cannot irritate.
Its dbsorbency is 10 times greater tho,
any other pad yet discovered. And tina
means it can be worn hours longer, il
safety and peace-of-mind, than an,
other pad. Consider what this means
It is, of course, as easily disposable q
tissue. 1t has 1879 greater power O
deodorization than any other pad.
It is called VEIDowN and in the frs
Observation-Disclosures ver10, 00t
women day discarded harsher, les
efficient ways and adopted it.
Protected by world wide patents it i
utterly different from any other PAL
now known or ever known to women
New design, new materials wholly
new creation in whose laboratories tn,
rayon industry was Graded. Expert,
say it will virtually revolutionize tn.
hygienic habits OF women theworldover
Due to manufacturing economies, il
sells for never more than the common.
sense price of Acc. And thus makes con
tinuing with old ways folly. Get 1t al
any store in ready wrapped package
vELDowN COMPANY. INC.
One ofthe Divisions ofths
International Paper e Po,esr Co.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1929-07-17
DIET AND HEALTH
BY LULU HUNT PETERS, M. d.

enough), I didn't notice It's unsatis-
factory effect. When I take coffee with
a muffin or anything unsweetened,
like it as sweet as two level teaspoon
fuls Of sugar $50 c. will make it. While
reducing, the one muffin I had for
breakfast gave me enough frankly car
bohydratc foods for the day, so really
didn't need this so c of sugar. By
using the saccharin, cut out 40 c,
which could apply to goodly portion
of the needed vegetables. I found that
tea sweetened with saccharin and 10 c
of sugar, and the juice of one-half
lemon (about 10 c. makes a very sat-
isfactory drink, also zone or two grains
a day is permisSible)
Still another thing did was to make
each Friday a low caloried day, not
over 900 c, as 1 count my weight from
Saturday to Saturday.
Well, it's of! I don't think I per-
sonally need to know anything more
about reducing. I have resolved that
hereafter when my scales register three
pounds more than normal, me for a
very low calorie day Immediately.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1929-07-17
Doctor Keeps Resolution.

Some time ago told you about my
swearing off on candy and nuts fer
two and one-half months, until my
birthday. Well, 1 kept my resolution
After lunch on the natal day, bought
a quarter of a pound of the candy
like best Zone full of nuts), ate half of
st, was completely satisfied, and not
having any one around to give the rest
10, threw it away.
1t seems a waste to throw away god
food doesn't It? But it is a waste plus
damage, if you eat food when you don't
heed it, so don't ever hesitate to throw!
Well, I've lost the seven pounds I
1ained during my Winter vacation.
ltPlus the seven more I had in excess
before I startedD Every time I have
70 go through reducing period, I
learn a little something more about the
subject. I got several lessons from
This session. One was that could get
along without candy and nuts, abso-
Iutely. (By the way, / must state that
after my one indulgence in cancy, I've
aworn off again for another two Months:
that is unless I take them as a dessert
and count them as part of my meal. /
realize that they will be taboo for me
for the rest of my life, and ! might
hs we'll get over my desire for them.
Another thing I learned Is this: 1t
takes five days of fasting to overcome
one day of feasting! When I say fast
Ing, 1 mean comparative fasting. One
Saturday stepped out, and instead OF
my usual 1900, had 1900, and part
Of them as supper after an evening
barty. My weight the following morn
ing was four and one-half pounds more
than it had been the previous morning!
CThis, of course, was mostly water re-
tention) Well, it took me Just five days,
on an average of 900 calorieS a day
(Which is quite low for me), to lose
that four and one half!
Many of those who feel that there
must be something the matter with
them because their dieting doesn't seem
to give results, undoubtedly undo in
one or two days of the week all the re-
ducing that has been done the bal
ance of the week. You see, it makes
the average number of calories for the
week maintenance, or even gaining
number.
1 have a friend who has to watch her
weight, and after day of overeating,
she takes a cathartic. But! The fol-
lowing day she goes up two pounds or
so and then she won't lose anything
further for three or four days. The
tissues having been depleted of their
needed water, hold on to it more than
usual after the depletion. This shows
that the loss due to cathartic is not
all a true loss. It is certainly not wise
to take cathartics habitually. as it ulti-
mately will inflame the intestinal tract
and do other damage.
Another thing learned: never have
cared for saccharin. To me it is a
peculiarly unsatisfactory sweetness.
But found that if used little less
than one-half level teaSpoonful of
sugar (Which would be only 10 c. with
the saccharin (one-quarter grain is
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1929-07-17
LITTLE BENNY
BY LEE PAPE.

After suppir ma was looking at the
entertainments In the paper, saying to
pop, My goodness Willyum, Hookbinders
are avvertizlng imported linen sheets at
practically nuthing.
Why don't they throw them away and
be done with 1t? pop sed. We've got
too many sheets now. Every time
look in q closit for towels cant find
anything but sheets. Why think Of
buying sheets when we awt 10 be SELL
ing them? he sed.
But my lands Willyum these sheets
are imported from Checkoslovackia,
Well If they're not good enough for
them why should we bother with
them? pop sed, and ma sed, Don't be
rediculiSs Willyum, CheckoSlovackia Is
famous for their sheets.
So will we be If the true Jacks ever
leek out. pop sed. We must have
enough to start q small hospittle, he
sed, and ma sed, Now Willyum do you
realize I'm tawking about real linen
sheets at dollars, the price OF cotton
ones.
A woman who has too many sheets
alreddy shouldn't even be intristed in
real silk sheets at IS cents. the price
of paper ones, pop sed. We're loaded
down with sheets, we're swamped with
them, the house is top heavy with them,
your a confirmed incurabie sheet hoard
er. he said, and ma sed, fSut did tell
you. Willyurn, these sheets are 80 inches
wide?
No, and don't care to know. pop
sed. No matter how wide they are,
they're not going to shrink with me be-
tween them, and I'm going to put an
advertisement in the paper tomorrow
offering to exchange so sheets for so
ash reseevers, he sed. A house without
sufficient ash reseevers is verse than
house with too many sheets, he sed
and ma sed, o. all rite, my goodness
wasent RELY seriously considering buy
ing any.
Then whats all the shooting for, zee
gods, pop sed.
And he got behind the sporting page
and ma started to look at the jokes
with a serious expression.