Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1929-12-15

whistle. The halls over"
Grundy college Song"
The quarterback on the Grundy Col
lege team burst into rhyme about Coach
Grundy:
odd Joe Grundyi
Lobbied on Monday.
Subpoenaed on Tuesday,
Sworn on Wednesday,
Questioned on Thursday,
Threatened on Friday,
WEIGHED on Saturday,
Featured on Sunday
And that's just the beginning of Old
Joe Grundy.
Let's give him a song!"
After running the team through its
signals, Coach Grundy told the players
he had player on the Lobbyist Col
lege team who could show them how
to handle ball"-"William B. Shearer,
American, patriot, propaganda, press
agent"
Shearer. impersonated by a club men,
Der, sang to the tune of The Mer-
maid" the following:
Twas Friday morning when I set sail
And was not far from the land.
When l saw Charlie SchWab a-stand-
ing on the deck
With a certified check in his hand.
oh, the submarines may roll.
And the five-f1ve-three may blow.
While Schwab and Bardo go skipping
to the tops
And the lobbyists lie down below.
Then Schwab took the check and put
1t in my hand,
For q generous man was he
And say: Mister Schwab, for
twenty-five grand,
Will keep your ships On the sea-"
Then off to Geneva I set sail,
Where I handed out my bunk,
And l sent the results to Mister
Schwab by mail
Not a single ship was sunk
Grundy Gives Senate List.
Coach Grumpy was asked what had
become of the list Of common and
preferred Senators" he had. promised
to give the Senate lobby committee.
ON reflection" said Grundy, 81 de-
cided that one George Moses in the
Republican party was enough. How
ever, I have in my pocket a list and I
will give it to you now"
Grundy sang to the tune of IT Have
a Little List:
LAS some day it may happen that q
victim must be found.
I've got little list; I've got a little
list
OF the Caraways and Heflins who
might we'll be underground
And who never would be missed, who
never would be missed
There's the pestilential Harrison, who
argues on the air,
And Borah with his waving hands and
irritating hair,
And Howell who is up on dates and
floors you with EN- fiat.
And Cutting, who on shaking hands,
shakes hands with you like that,
And Blease and Black and Bratton,
who on quorum calls insist,
They'd none of EN- be missed; they'd
none of 'em be missed.
He's got EN- on the list, he's got EN- on
the list,
And they'll none of 'em be missed,
they'll none of 'em be missed
There's the sage of South Dakota of
the well known Swedish race,
I've got him on the list, I've got him
on the list.
And there's King who eats statistics
and who puffs them in your face,
He never would be missed, he never
would be missed.
There is La Toilette, who praises with
enthusiastic tone,
All governments but this and every
party but his own;
There's Copeland with his bag of pills
and dose of saSsafras,
And Swanson of Virginia, who thinks
he's Carter Glass,
And Pine of Oklahoma has no reason
to exist,
none of em be missed"
1.-THE Gridiron Theater Guild" pre-
sented its own version of Eugene
O'Neill's famous play Marco Millions.
The scene was the court of the Great
Bull Con of Cathay. The drama I'M
folded the adventures of fol members
of the Millions family on their way
to the London Naval Conference.
Bull Con entered to the flourish OF
Oriental music. He was clad as a
Chinese emperor, and his court, in East
ern garb, accompanied him. His greet
ing by the court was:
Hail Bull Con, great Bull Con,
All the statesmen heed YOU
Hail, Bull Con, great Bull Con,
Politicians need you.
We know you are the one
They depend upon
So
Let them run, have their fun
Rule forever, Bull Conf"
Bull Con called for his grand Vi
Zier." who turned out to be Bishop
Cannon.
"Ah, my good Bishop Cannon, my
| faithful grand viZier what would BulI
Con do without you?" said Bull Con.
And what" replied the grand Vi
zier would / do without Bull COM"
Have YOU any good tips on the mar
ket?" Bull Con asked.
II still have faith in Methodist pre-
ferred, and Baptist common is not q
bad buy. Both have great future II
the right hands"
Arms Delegates Attend.
Four American delegates, en- route te
London, entered. They were "Marcc
Millions Stimson, Grand Vizier of the
United States; Col. David Million!
Reed, the Army's naval expert; "Jo'
Millions Robinson, the Senate's coali
tons naval expert" and Charles Fran
els Millions Adams, Minister OF tn
Navy" , :.
the rear?" demanded Bull Con.
They were found to be American
admirals going to the London confer
auon ,,,,roiy {yn an advisory canarity