Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1929-01-27

I should have done. hadn't any ticket.
hadn't paid my hotel bill. i hadn't
my baggage. If I'd had time, might
have telephoned Montrose, long dis
lance. What good would that have
done, though? Whom Gould / have
telephoned? The boys hadn't planned
to come home till late tonight Who
would have known where they were?
And where we're they? The tears
streaming down my face. read, over
and over, the paper had chung to. At
first, / tried desperately to think that
it might be some other three campers.
Lake Winreposocket is a huge lake:
there must have been lots of other
campers. But three young men! And
Stony Pointl Will had said they would
camp on Stony Point A Masonic en-
blem on one coat. Wills lodge pin.
1t must have been his old gray coat
There would be his pipe in the pocket.
and the two buttons off. 1 must sew
on those buttons. He'd kidded me about
them, and it had got TO be joke, so I
hadn't done it. / must sew them on.
They were in the little box on our bu-
reau. / must sew them on. kept
thinking about those buttons-I had TO
keep thinking about them. If hadn't
would have had to think of never
sewing a button on coat for Will
again. ! must sew-and suddenly,
couldn't think of this any longer.
/ shrank back and put my hands
over my eyes Trying to shut out the
thought Life without Will
Despair isn't always black. as they
say. 1t isn't any color. II isn't any
thing Just emptiness.
Would 1 go on doing things in that
emptiness? Putting the babies to bed?
When they had finished their supper
they always ran over to the window In
their sleeping suits. and 1 would sit
we would watch out the windows. down
Water street. for daddy TO come home
What would I do now? How could l
put them to bed now? How could l
tell them daddy wasn't ever coming
any more?
How could anything go on. If Will
never came home again? Could I go
on. setting the table Tor a Summer
breakfast on the porch. and not put
any chair there for Will? When my
wcrk was over what would I do. what
would I wait for if was never to hear
his whistle again? Our big chair in
! front of the fireplace. with the little
clock ticking in the stiffness of Win
ter evening. the little clock that Will
and 1 had wound and set to ticking to-
gsther on our first night in our own
home :. and Will not there -.
never again -.
I PRESSED my hands tighter over my
eyes. but couldn't shut it out.
That awful emptiness of despair. The
conductor called ''Montrose" had to
take my hands away, and in the sudden
blinking light felt my way down the
train steps.
There on the platform stood Will!
I can't remember what he did or
said. 1t was long time before real
lied that he was clinging to me in the
same frightened. unbelieving way that
1 was clinging to him.
Il was just petrified," he was saying.
The dearness of a familiar voice when
you had thought you might never hear
it again!
Just called you up. long distance,
when heard of the accident at Stony
Point! Thought you might hear Of 1t
and think it was us and be frightened.
And you weren't there! They were
terribly worried-theyd called the hotel
and you weren't there-girls have just
disappeared like that in big cities. and
never been found"
But how did you know that I was
| coming on this train?" I asked, be-
wildered.
Il didn't" Wills face was still a
little grayish around the mouth. Il
never thought of such thing. / was
waiting to catch the five-three. To
hunt for you"
The sun shone bright and warm
over us, the very planks on the station
platform floor seemed different from
any planks I had ever seen. Glorious,
happy planks!
I called the Janssens. long distance,
first. of course" Will was going on.
Il thought you'd be there at the party"
THE party!" exclaimed bewildered
And suddenly 1t dawned on me. The
bridge party the Janssens had been
giving for me!
had the briefest moment of feeling
guilty-it was too bad not to have
let the Janssens know. But only the
briefest moment. Standing there In
the sunshine with Wills arms around
Inc, suddenly saw, for a moment lust
how little things like bridge parties or
camping trips count. A blister on my
heel. Wills hating tearooms. taking our
vacation together or separately could
have laughed at the idea of having
given moments concern to things
like that. Only when tried to laugh
began to cry again.
Our vacation. stumbling around in
dark room, forgetting where every
thing that counted was. And then.
like a revealing flash of lightning. that
moment when I saw Will standing on
the station platform. A bright, quick
Hash OF lightning that lit UP every
shadowy corner
You couldn't live all the time in such
dazzling light. of course. I suppose
well be like all married people. trip
ping up now and then over some silly
trifie. But it will be long time before
Ill forget the lay of the room again!
I'll be able just to close my ewes
and see that dazzling flash. And know
where all the big, important things are
standing.
(Copyright, iQ2o.l