The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1929-03-21
ChiIdrgnATg
Made Weary
by Nagging
BY. MARTHA LEE

Women's problems multiply be-
tween the ages of IS and IS, if they
are married and have no children.
If they have children, they multiply,
too.
In the first case, it usually is be-
cause they suddenly find themselves
on the ragged edge of middle age
without an outlet for their mental
energy. excepting themselves, their
husbands and the servant problem.
In the second case it is because the
children are reaching ages when
they are becoming what is common
" known as cautions"
tt is much more normal TO De
worrying about someone else, now
ever, than it is to pass all the wax
ing moments trying to get PACK !oSt
youth. which is, unfortunately what
most childless wives do when they
see youth waving hasty tareWeH.
Women who have children, Tor
the most part, seem to grow old
more gracefully than the wives VINO
have only themselves to think ABOUT.
accidentally, too, they seem to stay
younger, more in touch WIN .tne
times, more interested IN hunanlVy'
Worry Over Children
But once in while you find a
mother growing wrinkled and gray
headed through worry over her
children. And usually it is because
She does not understand them.
And the reason she does not uIl-
derstand them is because she Will
NOT admit they are growing up, that
thew are reaching the age when they
want to think for themselves, Wnen
thew no longer require constant
watching and caring Tor.
Children resent being treated ike
infants after they reach the age
when. they are capable OF doing
things for themselves, mentally, just
as they resent being carried around
after they have learned to walk, OF
being held down when they have
learned to move their arms ana
legs.
mother who wants her chlldren
to be perpetual babies writes:
Dear Miss Lee: What is the world COM
ing to? I have three children. baby
IN a. son is. and daughter ID. 1t USED
to be that they could do nothing WITHOUT
asking mother If it were all right. NO"
even the youngest resents my telllhg het
what is what, according to my way OIL
thinking.
In recent years have noticed breach
widening between my Oldest child ana
myself. She has gotten independent be-
vond nv understanding. She does not
ask me if she may have dates. When
tell her to come in by certain hour. she
may and she may not.
when demand an explanation. she
simply says that the others were not READY
to come. and she could not leave until
thew did. When I ask her II 1t is more
important to do what pleases them OF
me she saws I am unreasonable. She is
a good girl, 1 know. but I am worried
about her disregard for my wishes
If she is reading a book and l tell ner
T do not want her to finish it, she asks
the reason, and argues with me aoout
IT as though 1 do not know what am
talking about.
NV son is the same. He resents the
interest I take in his whereabouts MS
school chums, his little affairs. can
not understand it at all. They love me.
7 am sure. but treat me as indnerenty
az if I were an aunt who was caring LOT
them.
o1p-FAsHIoNED MOTHER.
You are too interested IN them.
Your worries are unfounded and the
breach between them and you IS
widening of your own making. Your
daughter does not ask you the why
about things to make you angry.
She asks you SO that she may
weigh your reasons against her own. I
She wants to know your viewpoint
on things. She is old enough TO
want to exercise her own mind on
problems that directly concern her.
Looks Like Curiosity
Don't YOU understand that your
avid interest in the least little thing
they do or say, read or think, must
seem like plain curiosity to them?
AS though every little thing they did
had to be weighed and measured
and finally passed on? They want
to think things out for themselves.
If you think they are wrong, II you
feel they have arrived at a false
conclusion, they want to know the
workings of your mind, responsible
for the attitude on the subject you
have. That is not being disrespect-
full nor dishonoring you as mother.
Your children's confidence Will
come without your seeking it, II you
do seek it, at times when it is I'M
necessary and trivial, some time
when it would be a great help, they
will think of your questions on some
very trivial subject, and reject you
as their conf1dante.
1t is better to get in step with the
times. however distasteful they may
be to you than to lose out complete
Iy with those you love most.
Washing Pets
1ry1 49,, wash UHIIT nets