New Britain herald., 1929-03-07
|ANDY'S VIEWS ON
 NEW AUTO MODELS
He Observes Spring Designs and
 Makes Sage Remarks
(Contributed)

NCVita ApAANO/
 Dear Mary Ann.
 From the way you asked me why don't I loosen up long enough to stop being a tightwad l gathers you are peeyed because I didn't take you 10 the auto show last Saturday to once-over the gas wagons, I'd have taken you if I wasn't too much of gentleman 10 have you pay your way as all I had was 5 gallons in the flivver tank and half dollar with no companions in my pocket. I'll tell you about the late models ] enjoyed seeing even though you wasn't with me.
 On most models much attention was given to polished nickel work. with little silver thrown in for good measure. Soon instead of driv- ing your bus into auto laundry for plating factory or the jewellers, not to mention having the gear teeth fixed at the dentists. Some had col- ors to match your old gents necktie if he owned one and so beautifully finished that scratching it would be a bigger breach of road etiquette than gyping the fella outa the right of-way. On leaning over gazing at the inside of a buggy my coat but tons didn't do the paint job any good and a salesman tells me about it. Excuse me for living" l couldn't help grinning, and for not having my buttons upholstered"
 Some buggies featured the finger tip control" which controls at the finger tips, great help to drivers used to having both hands full and then some in keeping the bus from crowdng the ditch"s. So many gad- gets attached that you'd hafta be q plumber or at least helper 10 un- dcrstand 'cm. All that was lacking was a sound proof box to park the engine knocks and an automatic steering apparatus for Romeos W hO the wheel. especially when d jane is with them Some busscs were of tho chummy type. with room to hold the driver. his license. if any. and the other lads girl friend.
 Other chnmmier types had the r,ar-scat drivers delight. or the 'muttcr, humble and erumbl"' seats. One bus was built so low fl seems even a ,DaGhShund couldn't crawl under it without complaining ,f I, ,tr I., tly., h Then again was the iimousines so big they could easily be mistaken for the long lost brother of iitney bus and all you need 10 park them in was an airplane hangar or part Of the Grand Canyon. They Were room- fer than your iron, porch with the distance from the rear seat 10 the front so great that you'd hafta take long steps to whisper something in the chauffeur's ear.
 You'd get about 8 or miles per gallon and on long run would , probably hafta carry a filling station along Smooth riding with the only jar being on the pockotbook. 4 fel la could retire on what it'd cost to call one of these freight cars his own. as they were equipped with everything but q telephone booth and a shelf to check your derby. Several expensive long whcel-base buggies were Of the open or look who's riding in it. type. One feature for the folks located back in center field was a cover or table or some thing on hinges which could be pulled down in front sos you would n't fall out even when going over the curb after a pedestrian or around corners
 This table or cover sorta remind- cd me of kiddie's high chair eN- ceptins there wasn't any oatmeal dish on it. An upright windshield was attached which l didn't care for because if the chariot should ab- sentmindedly attempt 10 chase a squirrel up tree it'd only mean an- other one to go crashing through. But maybe this feature will be a great boon 10 messengers who like to have something to lean their el- bows on when viewing the scenery and billboards. Also 10 those on pie nics too lazy 10 get ont on the rum ningboard when eating lunch.
 Andy Drle.