The Washington times., 1929-03-11
MINI IEH0KUS,
|. SHE DRINK
FIRE WATER
BY DOROTHY HERzOG
CCspyright. 1870. Prsmisr Syndicate,
Ime.)

Ine.)
HOLLYWOOD, Calf. March II.
The following eplstle is explanas
tory--or am wrong again?
eli:
"Your Monday squawk--not q
Vitaphoner--is tooken with the flu.
1 mean Minniehokus. She don't
want no one to know she's under
q Doctors care, AZ 1t might inter.
fere with her talky racketeering.
But she is. Min got hold of some
Eighteenth Amendment stuff and
1t didn't agree with her Injun con.
stltution. SO she give me the
1inRIe.berry and come over to
spill chatter and cheer her up by.
explaining how the other half
lives.
Min was upset, II being Mon.
day and her disabled to write your
colem. Min says you're 80 lazy
she wonders why you don't starVe
to death. SO to stop her temper
attlre from burning up the ther-
mOmeter / said I'd set awhile and
pinch hit for her. You know me.
I'm FlossIe Murphy, the frail what
retires before midnight and can't
get q movie contract.
HOtsy WOpsy
II was tellin Minniehokus about
q guy who took his heavy sweetie
for q ride without her KNOWN.
The dame was married to q funny
guy but she's got air now. Then
she met UP with this pain In the
ankle what's also in pictures. He
took a fancy to her alimony and
gave her the cupid rush. Finally
he popped the 'will-you' and she
uh-huhed. So he hader pinch
her finger with a glitterer. He
worked real cute and my girl
friend says the dame paid some
of her hard.earned alimOny for
the ring.
Which amt the half of it.
After she found the sparkler
what appealed to her pupils, her
Iollipopper took the jeweler aside
and explained the girl friend had
gone to two other places, where
she found rings she liked just as
we'll. Now IL the jeweler would
give him 4 commission on the
ring Ned grab it. So the jeweler
said sure, and gave him Is per
cent. So after the frail paid for
her own engagement ring the big
bum grabbed off is per cent and
kept his mouth ciamped.
"BeIieve me, baby, / do my
papa shopping on the free-lance
market where air is free and only
the neighbors savVy.
Oh. For Riches
81 was tellin' Minniehokus about
a boy friend of mine who used
to John Gilbert with Clara Bow.
He says one thing he likes about
that dame is she don't mistake
every man for a walking dele
gate for Tiffany. And she als1't
always throwing q party and
ma king guests come bareback and
tuxedoed. She's natural, like when
the dice cog.sA seven or eleven on
the first roll. I'd like it real
smart if Clara went in for the
hitch act il only TO get an earfui
of Hollywood wrapping asbestos
around asterisks and broadcasting
in the parlor.
that she visited with Clara one
afternoon. Guess where she keeps
her dressing table? In the bath.
Yeah. Min says her house is
sorter small and Clara believes
in takin' advantage OF convenient
corners. II ! ever get discovered
/ figure to do likewise even
though folks mayn't understand.
They have fun not understanding
out here.
Ends and Odds
Il seen q guy at the Brown
Derby the other night who was
introduced as Arthur Caesar. He
come out to write for Fox fillums
but he's on the loose now. He
cracked out with: 1T couldn't
happen in any business but the
movies-~from Poland to polo in
two generations" Which made
me answer: And from polo to
turkey in a third"
II seen Charlie Chaplin pull
funny one without intenshun.
Charlie was eatin' his supper in
a restaurant and every time he
filled his fork with food and
raised it he shifted 1t before
eatin' it. / only mention this a.
Minniehokus says you'd like to
know how the other half eat.
Wait a minute. She wants to
add a word"
How. Catchum bad cold. Hit
the springs. Run temperature.
Plenty exercise. Bime by get up.
Come next week. 'Slong."
well, / don't know what else
to say but sign off with regards
from-FLOSSIE MURPHY"