The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1929-03-02
Expert Solves
Problems of
BetrOthed
BY Beatrice Fairfax
An Authority on Problems OF Love
and Marriage.

token is solitaire diamond on
the third finger of her left hand.
Or she may choose to wear a sap
phire or other favorite stone.
Even the absence of a ring does
not mean that Miss 1929 is not
engaged. She may support the
feminist theory that a ring Is a
symbol of serEitude, or. far more
likely, for economic reasons, may
forego the enga cement ring. But
ring or no ring, the girl is SUI
premely happy. who knows, as
the earth awakes to blossoming
beauty, that she is engaged to
the right man.
Betrothal is, or should be, the
happiest period of girlhood. But
1t also brings problems. And on
the solution of these may depend
future joy or misery.
1t happens occasionally that a
girl il not certain whether she Is
engaged or, merely has an under
standing. But there is no such
thing as being sort of engaged
or mot exactly engaged" Either
girl is or is not engaged And
II she is wise she prevents heart
breaks by refusing to count her
self engaged until a clear-cut pro-
posal and her cIear.cut acceptance
remove all roo i for doubt.
Modern Romeos do not always
propose i'm set terms. But when
they are in love and eager 70 Wed
thew make their meaning clear.
Ted didn't ask me to marry
him. confided one engaged girl
'He just told me I was gong 10.
marry him. I believed him"
The purpose of an engagement
of marriage is to enaLle glrl
and young man to understand
each other well and so avoid the
danger of marrying unless they
are suited to each other. 1t may
be well to ask yourself:
Gam / engaged to the rlgnt
man? Is my engagement wise!
While an engagement should
not he broken lightly, it is far
better to shatter the romance
before than after marriage. 1t
too often happens that an engage
rnent builds illusions, which pre-
vent both parties from under
standing each other. TO avoid
this mistake, try to he honest.
DO not pretend TO be what you
are not even to please the Dear
est Man.
Anne and Jim meet, let us say.
They are attracted. Anne longs
to be Jim's ideal. so she assures
him she adores children and
would be ideally happy in a white
cottage with green blinds, cooking
coy home dinners.
,Jin1's one unehanging passion
ig music. But Anne is not musical,
so he does not mention this. They
are married.
Anne is bored 10 death in the
country. She hates housekeeping.
She cooks abominable meals for
Jim, stacks the dishes. She is
crazy to get her old job back, for
she Is a born business woman.
Meantime, Jim meets a girl who
plays the piano superbly to ac-
company his violin. His one idea
is to spend his evening with
her.
We are what we are in our
tastes. likes and dislikes. We
cannot change ourselves or others
before or after marriage. So
state your terms honestly; fear
1essly, in fairness to your sweet
heart and yourself. Honesty should
lead to congenial union.
/ am thinking of couple who
were attracted to each other and
soon learned that they had the
same overwhelming ambition: To
travel. Their assets in case they
married would be willingness to
work hard and save, and small
apartment house, to which Joe
) fell heir.
Two years of frugal living after
marriage, then they look their
accumulated rents and savings,
and leaving Hates mother in
charge Of the apartment house,
departed for India and the Orient,
to stay as long as their money
held out.
Returning happy and thrilled,
the two began working and saw
i ing for a second tour. They are
now writing book about their
latest year of travel. An uncon-
ventional marriage this, Of two
born royers! But ii Is successful.
because it is built on honesty and
suitability as well as love.
Many girl in g marrying
mood has taken a gambling
chance on success in marriage
only to repent at leasure.
"He Is twenty-five years older
than ! am" complained one wife,
recently regarding her mate. Liv-
ing with him is like living with a
mummy. There Is no companion
ship. He left my last weekly al
lowance with note saying,
Wives are gold .diggers.
Strange that this couple did no.
forsee the inevitable outcome of
such a marriage while they were
engaged.
Let us suppose that there has
been frankness and honesty be-
tween you and your fianee and
that you are truly in luNe, happy
as dovesl There are ever 80 many
ways of keeping love and interest
fresh.
is your fiance tired at the end Of
q hard day? Give him a quiet in
stead of hectic evening. Don't ex-
pect him to dance every night or
tempt him to spend more than he
should. A neighborhood movie with
him can be as good fun as the lat
est revue. Or sit at home for a
change and chat connpanionably
If he wants to go home at ten
and catch up on sleep so he will be
fresh for work, don't retoFt pet.
tishly. "Oh. / see! You think more
Of your old office than you do Of
me-
Put yourself in his place. Try
20 understand. The girl who uR-
derstands and sympathizes, holds
her mans love.