davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1929-02-01
WHY WE LAUGH

Men and women laugh because they amused. This,
at least has been the universal theory: but London
psychologist comes forward with the se-contradictory
theory that the really happy laughs and that
the unhappy man cannot laugh. According to this
authority, the laugh is hidcous grace the smile alone
being beautiful and permissible.
1t all depends who does the laughing whether it is
beautiful or comparable to the snar of the hyena
haps it is because used to laughter thanks
be unto Infinite Wisdom that these dcta will strike most
of the twadde Of seeker for notoriety true
that there are all sorts OF laughter unpeas-
ant and aroused by of the ludcros but in
its welcome the betokens harmless mer-
riment and reflection Of the charm and beauty Of
living.
A few more generations and the children won't know
what the old folks talking about they quote some-
thing about leading horse to water.
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1929-02-01
YOUR
CHILDREN
~ Muc R6e,zs Ba,zts7

Il told you not to do that, you bad
boy. Come right here this minute.
Now you're all dirty"
II couldn't help it, honest / couldn't.
Nom. Rex's chain was twisted and
he"
shut up. Don't answer me back.
I know what happened"
Late again! Didn't I tell you to
be home every day at four o'clock
sharp? Now just for that you can do
without your allowance"
But. Mother. 1t wasn't my fault.
Just as was leaving school man.
mo impertinence now. When will
you learn not to talk back. A rules q
rule. No allowance to a boy who
can't keep his word"
"Dorothy-Ma johnson! Tn simp-
ly amazed that you'd tell a lie. HRS.
Heath was here and explained all
about 1t. never thought daughter
Of mine would tell lie about such a
little thing as a pair of skates"
But I didn't, Mother, really. At
least I didn't know it was lie. !
thought"
Nov just be quiet. young lady,
none of your back talk. I'm telling
you; you're not telling me-"
And Dorothy Mays mother went
on and on about the terrible lie that
Dorothy May hadn't told at all. but
got the blame for, owing to compli-
Gated situation and something she
could not help.
When will some parents learn that
an explanation is not impertinence
and that it is due all children? Always
give child time to explain and weigh
well his explanation.
Often when the case is blacklist
against him, he can show you that he
was justified in his actions.
At any rate give him q hearing.
There is no BLACK is black and white
is white" Even the veriest criminal
is entitled to hearing
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1929-02-01
Editorial Comment
MORE TEARS OVER OUR MATERIAL. CIV
ILIZATION
minneapolis Tribune)

minneapolis
Rebecca West. after her latest tour of the limited
States is back in England where she is shedding tears
over the sad. sad plight of American civilization
The United States she informs her pres,nahlv u;de
eyed and appalled, English listeners is place where
everybody lives in skyscrapers where they cannot
keep dogs much less families"
We need particular attention to this observation
which for accuracy might be compared to some Aeri-
can observation that all the English live in trees Miss
West OF course using hyperboe and seeking convey
the impression that Americas mechanical civilization i'm
plies cultural serity and spiritual DEATH That is the
familiar patitude Of the intellectual
AS to how sound this patitude is it might be we'll to
quote Hu-Shih Of China. Hu-Shih is the product of
oriental civilization which is certainly nonmechanical
ana commonly termed spiritual He knows eastern and
western civilization equally we'll Writing in whittier
Hu-Shih says:
What spirituality is there in civilization (the east
ern) which tolerates such terrible form OF human sav
the rcksha cooe? Do we seriously believe there
can be any spiritual life left in those poor human beasts
OF burden who run and toll and under that peculiar
bondage of slavery which knows neither the minimum
wage nor any limit of working hours? Do we really be-
eve the lie OF ricksha cooe is spiritual more
moral than that OF the American workman who rides to
and from his work in his motor car who takes his
whole family outing and picnicking Sundays in dis
tant parks and woods who listens to the best music of the
land on the radio almost at COST and whose children
are educated In schools equipped with the most modern
library and laboratory facilities?
Where has to sweat blood in order to earn the
lowest KIND OF livelihood there is little life left letting
alone civilization civilization worthy OF the name
must be built the foundation of material progress
The term, material civilization which has 90
OFTEN been applied to stgmatze the modern civilization
OF the west seems to me to be appropriate word
Tor the Of the backward civilizations OF
the east That civilization which makes the fullest
possible use of human ingenuity and intelligence In
search OF truth in order to control nature and transform
matter for the service Of mankind to nberae the human
spirit from ignorance superstition and slavery to the
forces Of nature and to reform social and political
situations for the benefit Of the greatest number-suc
c1vl!izatlon IS highly idealistic and spiritual"
These are burning words spoken not by an American
Babbitt but by the greatest Chinese thinker Of the day
Shih, because of his dual oriental and occidental
BACKGROUND has perspective upon contemporary cvz-
alton which very few people We suggest Miss
West that she read HuShh reflect upon his words
then decide whether American civilization really In
plight TO justify the tears which she coousy sheds
whenever she thinks about it.
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1929-02-01
DETROITs ACCIDENT CAMPAIGN

The way in which traffic fatalities can be materially
cut down police and court authorities really put their
minds to 1t IS evidenced by what has been done in
troit
At the beginning of 1928 Detroit launched intensive
to reduce accidents put extra police had
motorcycle officers patrol all streets regularly did away
with light sentences in the courts and with the backing
o9 the newspapers tried to educate driver and pedestrian
TO the Importance Of what being tried.
The result? Deroits traffic deaths in 1928 were 20
per cent under the total in 1927 Yet in the nation as
whole the total ives two cent higher than in the
ceding year
It takes effort and costs money OF course But our
raffic casualty list is shame. and any remedy that
produces results is good Other cities might do we'll
10 copy Detroit.
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1929-02-01
IN NEW YORK

New York, Feb. THOSE obscure
Hungarians have pounded out their
native tunes upon the cymbalom in
East Side cafes, have suddenly been
captured by the uptowners. HALF q
dozen Of the wiser. II less esthetic
youngsters, have become the vogue
among the night providers, who ever
search for transient novelty.
Down In Second avenue, where
Houston street forms q 1T" or up in
the Nineties, where the gypsy bands
cast romantic spells, the cymbalom
has long been the favorite Of instru-
ments among the dark-eyed, ebon-
haired sons and daughters OF Hun
gary who seek to recapture frag-
mentS Of home atmosphere.
The food IS native. the music Is
native and the wine, II not native.
seems to pass when shot with settler.
For the most part, the patrons are
native. Now and then . gypsy cafe
comes along to lure away the play
boys and playgirls Of the Broadway
belt-but they have never been cap
tured by the novelty seekers in the
sense that the Russian cafes have.
Within two brief years the largest
OF the "balalaika" resorts Of Second
avenue have Ill but passed from tile
hands Of Russians into the posses
sion Of the Summers. The walls nov,
carry typical American advertise
nients Of the photograph records
made BY the .bal4laika players, while
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1929-02-01

them only to be reminded Of them.
Thus, way out in Harlem-way out
where the 125th street ushers in the
BLACK belt" came upon Evelyn
Nesbit the other night-again an en-
tertainer In q cabaret.
Then just night or two ago. at
one of the snapper night clubs. where
high collars and formal attire" are
demanded, who should be out sing
ing. dancing and gagging but Fatty
Arbuckle. He, too, has started up the
ladder dozen times since the tragic
afternoon in San Francisco when Vir-
ginia Rape died mysteriously in his
hotel room. He has been a vaude-
vile headliner, movie director and
a club owner In fact he has been
everything except what he should
have been-which Is q funny, fat
comic Of the films. Today, grown
many years older, one wonders If he
would still be q good cinema slap
sttcker. In his day. he always seemed
to me one of the best.
GILBERT SWAN.
Copyright, 1929, NEA Service, Incl
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1929-02-01

including the rich. proclaims them
above minute considerations for the
last word which animates the lives Of
lesser mortals. A Vander-Astor for
instance is always much more plainly
dressed than Gladys, the shop girl,
just as Thomas Edison will wear his
"reefer" when a floor walker would
be caught dead first.
COLLEGE GIRL MATTRESSES
Chicago has a restaurant in which
every employee. from bread slicer to
cashier. is college girl. The pro-
prietor says that "pleasantness" is
the cardinal demand of every employee
and that, without that, even sheep
skin cum laude can't save her from
being fired.
SHOULD THEY?
As member Of this vast public I
have no desire to minimize the i'm
portance Of "pleasantness." Still, after
listening In on some sessions which
mattresses and other employees have
with the most despicable members Of
the human species. I wonder II this
the public is always right" slogan
can In justice be demanded OF them.
Moreover. wonder II It's good for che
public to be aided and allotted in
discourtesy and utter lack Of self
control because the waitress or usher
is forbidden to talk back" Pleasant
ness Is very well, but there are times
when meekncsS ceases to be q virtue.
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1929-02-01
A LONG TINE LEARNING

Modern civilization Is cooperation. That is good
thing to remember when reading the pessmstic state
ments In lot Of reading matter that is being tossed
about
Wherever exists beautiful building big factory
fine. smooth road there is evidence that lot of
men who could save money and lot Of men who could
think and plan and lot OF who could work. all
have been helping each other. Such structures and
achievements cooperation Of the highest and finest
type.
The ideal Of good business that every shall
the help In the way he best The inventor
d useful but Of the best inventors have been
poor They could not make the things they dreamed
Of until other men came to their aid. But the who
had money could not bring out the inventors idea with
out the aid Of the who willing to do ordinary
days work. All three would be at standStil unless
they were willing to help each other
Some figures issued recently about three the
largest in the United States. Together they
had 100000 stockholders That meant that all those
people had put in their savings to do business together
and had contributed almost $4,000,O0OO0O which was
called the total capital The businesses employment
to almost 100000 workers Probably than
workers thus supported and the wages that they
drew amounted to almost $750.0oo,o00 year.
Those are the figures concerning the people immedi-
ately = these big business erests But be.
cause CT t. ,'''ons of othr people also had
Jobs and earned money And by what they were able
achieve. millions millions Of persons. not only in
this country but all the world able to make
Z living and enjoy comforts and luxuries.
The world long time learning the way to play
the game. but the great mass of humanity had little
property little leisure and hardly liberty until the
method Of cooperation was adopted There is much in
and wrong left in the world but that exists merely
the ideals of the system have not been observed
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1929-02-01
GRADE CROSSINGS

The fghtful accident at Bellevue. o. where 10 people
killed when electric interurhen car crashed into
loaded bus, forces to consider the per-
t1exing grad. crossing problem.
According to stories ct eyewtnesses the of the
bus used at lecSt fs- szaocs,t Of caution He stopped
mis- go: out walked to the crossing and looked each
nay to see thct the clear before he went
nead snowssorn was In progress at that time how
vef. and he failed to see the approaching nterurban
The motcrmnn Of the interurban saw the bus but it
standing c and he assumed that was waiting for
him to So he did not sacken speed until was too
lAte
18th drivers attending duty The accident ap-
ently simply Of those things that inevitably
happen occasionally at unprotected grade crossing
ey emphasize the fact that later no matter
how much It costs, shall have to embark on program
~ the elimination Of al grade crossings In this day Of
hsayy traffic they are too great . menace
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1929-02-01

The Bidding: South bids one spade
West bids two hearts. North bids two
spades and all pass.
Deciding the Play: West leads
King Of hearts and Declarer takes
with Ace Of hearts. Declarer then
plays Ace or spades and opponents
follow suit. Declarer follows with
King Of spades and West does not
follow. How should Declarer continue
to play to insure game?
The Error: Declarer continues g
exhaust t.rs.:==..
The Correct Method: Although
Declarer can exhaust East Of III o.
his trnmps. he should only draw
trumps three times ana then play
clubs until Ace Of clubs y forced.
When Declarer obtains tho lead. the
commanding trump = played and =
= result Cpponents make only one
heart trick, one diamond and one
club. r the lat trump had been
drawn too soon, oppouonts would have
run thar hearts and prevented game.
The RFincjp1e: 10 MT 10y IT.
commanding trump Il 20 haye -
established suit,
Copyright, 1929, Ready Reference
Publishing Coz
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1929-02-01

DR.. Mccoy will gladly answer
personal questions on health and
diet, addressed to him. care of the
Tribune.
Enclose Z stamped addressed
envelope for reply.
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1929-02-01
THE THIN RANKS

veterans Of the Civil War rapidly diminishing in
nberA In very few years there will not be left one
nan who actually remember the incidents OF that
e6lhe struggle
1e Department Of the Interior has revealed that the
im roll Of Civil War veterans has sl,runk to 6s7ss-
1oo lower than it six months ago. thus indicating
& the veterans are dying ct the rate Of more than
49, month.
M tst RITE II six years the last OF the veterans viii
II oone Much q the same rate Of mortality probably
liee 70 the Confederate veterans OF course. there
~ lew exceptions tough hardy msn Of unusual
~. who Vim uuser o. for years after their COM
1D hays eana.
- ~ ranlu ~ thinning fast 4 = tragedy The
ont - dGhteF4 nogth and south. served veil and
- eeunfv VIM + much poorer when none Of
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1929-02-01

especially good over salad Of water
cress and lettuce. the piquancy Of the
water cress seeming to blend well
with the cheese flavor.
QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS
Mental Poisoning
Question: w. L. J. asks: rs there
such q thing as mental poisoning?'
Doubtless you have heard the old say
ing that Worry will kill Will you
explain the process from the brain to
the nervous system?"
Answer: There is no doubt that
destructive emotions, such as worry.
anger, fear and anxiety will produce
poisonous substances within the blood.
I have written numerous articles
dealing with the value Of a mental
calmness for maintaining health. It
Is believed that the ductless glands
are active in the formation OF some
Of these toxic substances. There Is
yet room for much scientific investi-
CATION about mental poisons."
Dried Lima Beans
Question: H. j. writes: Having
but little means. I would like to use
the dried kidney beans or the limas.
Will you kindly instruct me IS to
which Of the two is best. and II about
an hours slow boiling would be about
right, and If little soda would make
them less gassy9"
Answer: Dried limaS are a little
less gas forming than the other
beans and are much more alkaline
forming. They should be very well
cooked If they are to be digestible.
Beans always have a tendency to pro-
ducing flatulencc. I do not advise
the use Of soda In beans.
Lump and Cancer
Question: Mrs. H. w. writes: Il
have a small lump in my breast =
been there thirteen years. It has not
altered in size during that time. DO
you advise it being removed or do
you think there Is danger of cancer?
7 dread an operation. but cancer still
more"
Answer: Operations for Jumps In
the breast are entirely successful II
the lump has not become cancerous.
so you need not fear such an opera
ton. and In fact, 1t may allay your
fears of your trouble II you have the
lump removed surgically.
Copyright. 1929. BY TIE Bell Syndi-
cate, Incl
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1929-02-01
|iAnAN[5
1sGR 4: !:,-
ALLENE SUMNER

Strong men of the University Of
Oklahoma have risen up to give CO.
eds little light on that old question
of whether man loses respect for Z
girl who permits him to kiss her. The
answer seems to boil down to whether
OSCILLATION Is highlight Of the first
time they have dated together, or q
bit later, at least the second or third.
The undergrads don't seem to recog-
nize any argument at all as to
whether she should or should not be
kissed eventually.
WHO WANTS 1T?
The lads seem agreed, In general,
that il the gent had respect for the
lady to start with, the kiss made no
difference, but that II he hadn't he'd
never have any after that. Most Of
them seemed to wonder, too. just
what respect" was, and why any
girl particularly wanted 1t.
That seems the real answer. Yes
terday's girl was brought up on the
theory that she couldn't live without
this male respect" Today's girl
doesn't stop to wonder whether she
has it or hasn't.
CASTING IN
Lita Grey Chaplin is travelling
around on q vaudeville circuit all be-
cause the Chaplin part of her name
is printed In twice as big type as
the first. And here's Marie Rasputin,
daughter of the famous Monk, acting
in play based on her fathers life.
IT'S more usual to hear Of wife
cashing in on her fathers fame in
this manner than to hear of daugh-
ter doing 1t. But why blame either?
Husbands and sons have been known
to do the same. Count Salm, by the
way. husband OF Millicent Rogers,
announces that he Is to write q new
story of his marriage to the heiress.
CLOTHES OF THE FAMED
The most recent picture Of Mr.. and
Mrs. Thomas A. Edison show the great
inventor with an old.fashioned
'recfer" about his neck, outflung to
the wintTy gales, while Mrs. Edison
wears an anklc-length skirt and q
hat that seems to proclaim hat pins
and . knob Of hair underneath.
It Is almost automatic that any
picture Of the famous people of earth.
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1929-02-01

Miss Florence Mcdonald won the
gold watch given to the most popular
young lady at the fair.
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1929-02-01

TWENTY-FIVE YEARS AGO
Those who will attend the launch
ing Of the steamship Dakota at New
London, Conn. are COL C. B. Little,
Joseph Hare, r. ]. Turner, and M. H.
Jewell.
Drs. N. o. Ramstad and F. r.
Smyth went to Dickinson to attend
q meeting of the district medical
association. DR.. Ramstad will be one
of the speakers
General E. A. Williams had tele-
graphic invitation from J. J. Hill last
night. urging him to attend the
launching of the S. S. Dakota. Gen.
eral Williams left for the east today.
Word received from George j.
Douglas states that he is now in
Ashville. N. c.. and that he has COM
pletely recovered his health.
TEN YEARS AGO
Mrs. Elizabeth Geicrmann left for
Colorado Springs where she will spend
the remainder Of the winter.
Mayor A. w. Lucas and daughter,
Miss Helen left last right for q
several weeks trip to Washington, D.
c.. New York. Chicago. and the Twin
Cities.
Thomas Kelley, Wascka, Mimi, is
the guest OF his niece Mrs. e. A.
Kaiser.
Lieut.. and Mrs. Monte McConkey
and Lieut.. and Mrs. J. A. McConkey
are guests at the home of their par
ents, MIR. and Mrs. James McConkey.
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1929-02-01

cucumber may also be added. Add
q little more cream II the mixtures
seems too heavy. This dressing Il
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1929-02-01
dent, and w. A. Dillon as cashier.

Senator Fletcher was the winner OF
the gold headed cane awarded to the
handSomest man at the Catholic
ladies fair.
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1929-02-01

Thomas Kelley. Wascka, Mimi, is
the guest OF his niece Mrs. E. A.
Kaiser.
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1929-02-01
Our Yesterdays

FORTY YEARS AGO
The old Merchants Bank has been
reopened with Asa Fisher as prcsi-
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1929-02-01

rr. C. j. Alloway arrived yesterday
from Grand Forks.
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1929-02-01

Lieut.. and Mrs. Monte McConkey
and Lieut.. and Mrs. J. A. McConkey
are guests at the home of their par
ents, MIR. and Mrs. James McConkey.
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1929-02-01
TEN YEARS AGO

TIAN EAN0 AVHO
Mrs. Elizabeth Geicrmann left for
Colorado Springs where she will spend
the remainder of the winter.
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1929-02-01

Word received from George j.
Douglas states that he is now in
Ashville. N. c.. and that he has COM
pletely recovered his health.
The Daily Alaska empire., 1929-01-26

.a 7. Cinnabar can, easily be scratched by a knife, but jasper cannot. IL Is a very heavy mineral since it weighs eight times it's volume of water and three times it's volume of granite. Many valuable min erals are heavy, so always keep your eyes open for heavy minerals. From some cinnabar pure mercury globules can be knocked out upon the palm of the hand. Its hard ness, color, streak and it's weight easily make it recognizable"
 eCinnabar," continued Larry, is found in veins, disseminated, or in irregular masses in sedimentary rocks, quartzites, porphyries, and even in serpentines. A great deal of the time it occurs in sandstones and shales. With it are assoeiat- ed pure mercury, stibnite, pyrite, realgar (which looks like cianabar but it not nearly so heavy), and quartz. Some more minerals that I forget-knew them when I took the Short Course at the School of Mines" k
 9All this sounds good, but it must take large company to sue cessfully put across the workings of a mercury proposition. Returns are good especially if fellow like you or me could do all of the work and reap all of the profits
 Poor Mans Proposition
 Larry was up on his mercury too well for Jack. "cinnabar is a poor mans proposition. It does not take a rich company to make a mercury mine pay. Right at this moment there is oiie-man mine and plant in operation near Tono- pah, Nevada. The owner and operator not only performs the actual mining operations alone, but runs successful reduction retort at the same time: being thereby permitted to make a product di- recfly salable to the consumer or consumers agent. Obtaining mer- cury from cinnabar is very easy process. This mans property is producing about five flasks per month. Not Bad. is it? There are no difficult transportation problems confronting the producer of mercury" r
 Tn normal times between 80 and 10 per cent of the domestic produc' ton of mercury is used in the manufacture of mercury 'fsilminate for explosive caps. one flask of 7f rounds making -1ee-2o0 pounds c'