Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1929-06-03
MONEY FOR NOTHING
By P. G. Wodehouse
AEsEIsn MTyHsper Alliance and METROPOLITAN

! dear old thing. it's revolutionary. It
marks an epoch. Do you know what
| / think has happened? You remem-
| Der that dynamite explosion in the park,
when Uncle Lester nearly got done IN!
IT don't have much chance to Tor
get It," ,,
well. what I believe has happened
is that the shock he got that day
has completely changed his nature. It's
cases all the time. Ronnie Fish was
| telling me about one only yesterday.
! There was man he knew in London, a
money-lender, fellow who had a glass
eye, and the only thing that enabled
| any one to tell which of his eyes was
which was that the glass one had
rather a more human expression than
the other. That's the sort of chap ne
was. Well. one day he was nearly
konked in a railway accident, and he
came out of the hospital different
man. Slapped people on the back,
patted children on the head, tore up
!. o. us and talked about its being
everybody's duty to make the world
a better place. Take it from me, young
Pat, Uncle Testers whole nature has
undergone some sort of rummy change
like that. That swallows nest bust
ness must have been preliminary
symptom. Ronnie tells me that this
money-lender with the glass eye :"
Pat was not interested III glass-eyed
| money-lenders.
What were you saying about John?"
I'll tell you what I'm goiEg to do
I'm going home quick, so as tJ be among
those present when he starts scattering
the stuff. It's quite on the cards that
may scoop that 500 yet Once a tight
wad starts seeing the light =
You were saying something about
john" said Pat, falling into step with
him as he moved off. His babble irked
her. making her wish that she could
put the clock back a few years. Age,
they say, has its coln3ensations, but
one of the drawbacks of becoming
grown-up and Sedate is that you have
to abandon the childish practice of
dumping your friends on the side of
the head when they wander from the
point. However, she was not too old
to pinch her companions arm.
OUCH" said Hugo, coming out of
his trance.
What about John?"
Hugo massaged his arm tenderly
The look of greyhound pursuing an
electric hare died out of his eyes.
"Of course, yes. John. Glad you
reminded me. Have you seen John
lately?"
mo. I'm not allowed TO go TO the
hall and he seems too busy to come and
see me-"
1T isn't so much being busy. Don't
| forget there's a war on. No doubt he's
afraid of humping into the parent"
IF Johnnie's scared of father ."
There's no need to speak in that
contemptuous tone. I am, and there
are few more intrepid men alive than
Hugo Carmody. The old colonel, be-
| lieve me, is tough baby. If ever see
him I shall run like a rabbit and my
biographers may make of it what they
will. You, being his daughter and hav-
| ing got accustomed to his ways, prob
ably look on him as something quite
ordinary and harmless, but even you
will admit that he's got eyebrows that
must be seen to be believed
ooh, never mind fathers eyebrows.
Go on about Johnnie"
Right no. Well, then, look here,
young Pat" said Hugo. earnestly. "in
| the interests of the aforesaid John ]
want to ask you favor. I understand
he proposed to you that night at the
Mustard Spoon"
"Well?"
And you slipped him the mitten.'
"oh, don't think I'm blaming you,"
Hugo assured her IF you don't want
Nm, you don't. Nothing could be
fairer than that. But what I'm asking
you to do now is to keep clear Of the
poor chap. If you happen to run into
him, that can't be helped, but be a
sport and do your best to avoid him.
Don't unsettle him. If you come buzz