Brownsville herald. [volume] (Brownsville, Tex.) 1910-current, 1929-09-17
The Once Over
THE CIRCUS U
BY II. Z PHILLIPS

John Ringing. the big elephant and behemoth
man, has bought and taken over all the other biz
circuses in the United States. This gives him 4 mo-
nopoly OF all the three-syllable adjectives and double
oarreled 5uperlatives In the land.
The big attraction on the circus lat next reason, nav
be Mr.. Ringing himself in flesh-colored tights and
with q curly wig, billed as positively the one and
only genuine wild and fsrocious circus-swallower n
captivity, ladies and gunnulmenl He cats EN- alive
folks. bites their heads off and eats EN- nHvel"
Ihis Is the era OF big business. even in the menaR-
erie. the Slde-show and the big top" Though az II
may be on romance a trust" now controls the tinselled
bareback riders, the cavorting clowns. the prancins
steeds. the aerial acrobats and the wild animals Of
the land.
The fat ladies" are under one MANAGEMENT. The
sword-swanowers are eating under one boss. The
living skeletons are starving comparatively for a COM
mon cause. There is hardly an elephant in the coun-
Try that isn't working for Ringing. Every tigers howl
Is positively a Ringing operated howl.
Time was when several independent circuses came
to town each season and the owner of each, a colorful
old fellow with an enormous mustache. rode ahead
Of the big parade In his gold and silver chariot drawn
by four white horses. There was intense rivalry. Each
circus owner fought the other for the title of -the
greatest show on earth" If one show announced It
had two blood-sweating emo the next one de-
clared It had four. If one circus advertised a herd Of
20 pachyderms. the next one advertised 40. II was
great bunk and the people liked t.
Now the merger craze has caught The rircus neo-
pie. The circus trust has arrived. and howl Instead
Of colorful talk of "man-eating terrors Of the African
~jungles." 1.-THE worlds greatest herd Of full grown and
monster pachyderms." "Bosco the Bushman" and the
freaks of all nations" We may hear drab chatter
about operating efficiency. lowered production rosts.
maximum results and Fross receipts.
More and more efficiency is to be expected. The
lions will roar on signal only. the Bengal tigers will
snerl in strict accordance with a schedule. the RE
p~hant-washing will be done by electricity and the big
nea-hunt in the monkey case will be run on a system
Possible signs On circus exhibits:
AFRICAN
Bought at beginning Of fiscal year for $2.56T98.
Now earning 20 per cent on the investment.
LAUGHING ayENA
Cost .Sl225
Present value ................. So.575
Profit to show
H-IPPoPoTAMUs
Bought at close of last quarter for $1,000. Estimated
value at end OF third quarter, s7500l67. Financial
statement on request
SERIES
Commuter: One whose dying lawn
Is on his mind from dawn 20 lawn:
Who sprays It. then departs FOR town
And then speeds back to wet t down.
"
What's become OF the old-fashioned man who ased
to think an automobile didn't really get broken N
properly before he had owned 1t three reasons?
sss
NOW FOR THE ~ROLL-LEsS ROLL
The skinless frankfurter has been invented by z.
G. Freund. This probably will be accepted by the
masses as the outstanding scientific accomplishment
IF The rear.
"A death-dealing toxin is predicted IN the rext war.
A spoonful will be sufficient 10 kill a million. Well.
the thing for a soldier to do is to refuse anything he
rant eat with his knife.