Seward daily gateway., 1929-05-10
BUREAUCRATIC LITANY

AND it came to pass that there dwelt in the Land of Matanuska of the tribe which is called Knk. And he gat him wife, albeit many papooses which keepeth him the jump gathering food of which they did eat. Of there plenty, albeit sheep and goats likewise beaver Of these he did kill and eat, spar ing the females and the young that they might multiply the land And they waxeth happy and the papooses little dummies stuck out, there talow for the hair and bones for the dogs and skins for rament. And b. the great Manitou looked on and called it good Even so did he
 And it came to pass that the Sourdoughs, the tur- buen tribes of the land which is set to the east fleeing from plus fours and acetrmmed stepins sewar gas asphalt and matrimony Even feest they from this Came they them And they looked upon the land and called good And there for a Of their store gave the Kntes and of their squaws and of their dogs aye of the bsreaked dogs Even gveth them of these as given to Jacob.
 Verify saveth the Sourdoughs we will live in peace and harmony together, digging in the streams for gold eating of the same meat albeit sapjacks Voted not they that the land had been esped from afar by the Beaureauites, which is that mercenary tribe that dwell eth in the shadow of the great temple which eth be- side the Potomac which is river filled with slippery eels and catfish and which temple is called the Captol
 And it to pass that they sendeth the Kings messengers to spy out the trails and lalrs wherein dwelth the Knites and Sourdoughites Even did they them this And they set watch over the happy tribes Reareth them up in fashions and styles albeit the Charleston which they keth not for their rheumatism Even did they them this.
 And it came to pass that many were the rules and regulations imposed Like the children of Israel slaved by the Egyptians they lifted up their voice say ing: Set ye free; thy laws like not neither like we them, for To- they oppresseth much.
 But the kink hardened his heart, saying: I'll teach these turbulent tribes to plus fours and play golf if it takes all summer.
 Whereupon he who wandereth in the wilderness is made to geteth job; albeit the Knikits. He seteth them tamp ties, when b. cometh the boss and ooketh not with favor upon the ob He blasphemmeth much and cheweth much his plug. He canneth the Knikte.
 And it to pass that famine threatened the papooses and the mate of the Kniite. He taketh his gun like unto his forefathers He wandereth afar thru swamps green fields and beside still waters He kieth of the and of the beaver And his children seeth him from afar he staggers beneath his load of meat and rejoceth much For b. again would their dummies stick out; they would feast upon the neat the dogs would fight shnbones albeit eat of the marrow within
 Then colneth the keeper of the kings animals He looketh He frowneth Sayest he Knowest thou shalt not kill of the lordly when the grass is green? king thou hast much offended
 Whereupon he haleth them before the kings judges who looketh the Knikte and sayeth: We like him not verify he is abomnation in the land and reareth in pride which is not meat for his soul Slam him into the whosegough taketh of his chattes and talents of three hundred If he payeth not tack another three months unto him.
 The must be protected even though the native and his papooses aye unto the fourth generation I f writ