Brownsville herald. [volume] (Brownsville, Tex.) 1910-current, 1929-07-18
The Once Over
NEWS FROM AMERICA FOR THE BYRD
EXPEDITION
By q. Z. PHILLIPS

EXPEDITION
U. S. A-Monday: Well, we have now definitely
entered the period Of the long summer sunshine, and
for seven more weeks we shall be forced to sleep with
out sheets, listen to people describe their summer
homes and endure persons who read heat-wave stories
aloud.
Today it was 80 in the shade and Jensen was sent
out in search Of shade. He had not returned at din
ner time and it is believed he found it. We are in
great discomfort during the days, and the nights are
no bargain either, what with the people who play
radios with the windows open. We need supplies
such as lemonade, rickies, ice cream cones, electric
fans, fly-swe tiers and citronella. Spelvin, good old
Spelvin, is in a delirium from the peculiar malady
known as the "beer yearning," poor fellow. His cries
for lager are most pitful.
Peterson shot a ford this morning. This is the
season when the fords overrun the country in great
herds. We have to fight hard, I tell you, to keep them
off our camp.
U. S. A.-Tuesday: We are still in a very bad way
from the heat, which shows no signs Of letting up.
We try to forget it, but the newspapers remind lis of
it with big front page stories and lists of heat vic
tins. Hourly temperatures are displayed, too. 1t Is
all most depressing.
We have to go about in our flimsiest garments now.
Larsen has abandoned his underwear and we all sit
about nights with our shoes off. We are suffering
from a severe ice shortage. The iceman hasn't ap-
peared in 48 hours, and we fear he may have met
with a mishap. Spelvin has gone out in search of
him. Good old Spelvin! He's the boy to send out in
search of an iceman.
Our food problem is serious. We have nothing
but steaks, chops, veal potpies and great stores Of
corned beef which cannot safely be consumed in such
temperatures. Greeves, Larsen and Woffett left on
a salad hunt last night. We have plenty of lettuce
leaves and tunafish, but no sliced eggs. Greeves is
confident of bagging an ample supply Of sliced eggs.
U. S. A-Wednesday: jenkins says we may get a
shower today. We have now abandoned pajamas and
are sleeping a little more comfortably. We do little
now but sit about and read the weather forecasts.
Larsen slew a pair Of forecasters today. They both
deserved it. This is bully sport. What a splendid
fellow old Larsen is! Always doing good like that!
Woffett shot a cantaloupe dealer a few minutes
ago. Our cantaloupes have had no flavor whatever
and something had to be done about it.
U. S. A-Thursday: There is much sickness in
camp now due to eating soft-shell crab sandwiches
at the beaches. Several Of our men are laid up with
chowder poisoning, too. Spelvin, wonderful Spelvin,
slew a Giant Pest this evening. The fellow came
weekend automobile trip. Dear old thoughtful Spell
vini
n PRINCE IS A GOOD WATCHDOG
The great use Of aluminium will come in airplane
construction. If you have any aluminium deposits,
hold them."-Arthur Brisbane.
We're keeping ours under the pillow, Arthur.
Elmer Twitchell says he is not going to get any of
that new paper money. He's going to have his roll of
old bills overhauled and frightened up.
o KNOW TYPE
w type Is he?
A-Well, he's the sort Of man who'd slap you on
the back, knowing you had just come back from a
bathing beach.
He: Going down to the bathing beach?
She: No, I bruise too easily.