Brownsville herald. [volume] (Brownsville, Tex.) 1910-current, 1929-09-13
The Once Over
MR. HOOVER GETS A LITTLE NOISE

NH. HOOVER GETS "A LITTLE NOISE
("President Hoover refused to allow carpenters re-
modelling the executive offices to be stopped during
his office hours. He stated that he LIKED INDUS
TRY ABOUT HIM.--Newsi tem).
Scene: The presidents office.
President: ! just can't seem to get going. What
do you suppose Is the trouble?
Secretary: I don't know, sir. Maybe you're not IN
the mood for work.
President: I'm always in the mood for work. Ask
anybody.
Secretary: Possibly you're a little tired.
President (quite suddenly: I have It'll / know
what it isl
Secretary: What Is lt7
President: Those carpenters.
Secretary: What about them. sir?
President Cdisappointedly): They're not hammer
Ing.
Secretary: OF course. not. sir. / had them cease
hanmering.
President Indignantly: You had the carpenters
cease hammering2 You deliberately stopped them on
q day like this when I've more matters to attend to
than I've had in a month?
Secretary (apologetically) I thought it would an
noy you and
President: Hammering annoy Herbert Hoover? !
love it. I have to have 1t. I have never made an i'm
portant decision in my life without plenty OF ham
mering- The more hammering the better.
Secretary tpressing a button): They'll resume
hammering the minute they hear this buzzer. There
they goI
President Gas the carpenters begin pounding away
IN a terrific DIM: That's not half enough noise. 1t
may do while I study the latest tariff proposals, the
war debts settlement and the Arab outrages. but ]
will have to have much heavier hammering when !
take up the naval pact problems.
president Hoover sits at his desk in some relief
and goes over the problems of the day. but it is OBJ
vious that he Is not getting anywhere).
President wheeling about sharply: / simply ant
concentrat e. Ill have TO have much more pounding.
The carpenters must be using very small hammers.
Secretary: Ill 60 see at once.
President Ito himself in the secretary's ABSENCE (:
I'm very much disappointed in that secretary. If he
had any sense he would buy a hammer and do a little
pounding himself.
Secretary returning): I told the foreman that the
president Of the United States was very much disap-
pointed with their hammreing and wanted it louder
and funnier.
President listening as the carpenters give more
volume): That's more like IT,. But I don't hear any
saws. Isn't anybody saving?
Secretary: Not that I know Of. sir.
President: Well, then. you'll have to do it. Get n
very dry knotty board and a saw and saw through It
against the grain while I study the reports from the
Anglo-American naval reductions negotiations at Ge-
neva. And. mind you. no greasing Of the saw nowl
CThe secretary does as he is ordered and saws very
violently on a chair beside the PRESIDENT.
President latter a few moments): Nc. that won't
do. You may 60. Tell them to send me that other
secretary.
Secretary: Which one. sir?
President: The one that can play the snare drum.
initiate a buzz-saw going through a pine knot. and
bark like a dog.
Hoover has been president six months and there
Is this to be said Of him: He hasn't been photographed
even once In Indian headgear.
Add SMILES: So old -fashioned he never neglects his
business for golf.