The producers news. [volume] (Plentywood, Mont.) 1918-1937, 1929-12-27
On The Lam

4 III @ 49, "
Seen, heard and imagined: DIR.
York standing at the corner of the
Merchants and Farmers State
Bank with a pail of hot water In
one hand, talking to a young lazy,
while the thermometer was regis
tering twenty below the doc
tor and the lady looked like ITO in
the shade Fifteen persons sit
ting in the City Cafe twiddling
their thumbs q. mattresses gaz-
ing idly in the mirror. Harry
Koike looking sad suddenly
the door opens and a man walks
in :. everybody begins to look at
the menu John McElroy gets
hold of knife and fork and shouts
there's a live one" Things
are bad but Great Scottl Re
minded me of a forenoon in
speakeasy Martin Olsen de-
claring that the last friend he had
in town is no good thinks Lou
is Moe is a good barber but should
mind his own business A Gus
toms officer diving up the alley by
the Producers News office like
beagle after a piece of liver 1t
is reported that certain customs
officer is really a prohibitionist at
heart Believe it or not we
don't. Slogan for Plentywood. Get
them out of the alleys before next
Christmas Shadows of Henry
Ford's stop-the-war mission.
"a
Andrew Hansen, the miller, la
bored nightly trying to sell ton
of something or other to Art Wan
kel, the farmer. Art put on all his
sales resistance and you could see
the sparks fly from Andy's fire
glance harmlessly off Arts ar
NOR. Clever fellow Andrew Han
sen. Laughed his head off, or al
most, when he heard the sad story
about the loss of Harry Hilyard's
hogs. 1t appears that Andy keeps
his hogs clean shaved in summer
time and has them trained TO grow
fur in winter. Il have studied evo-
luton" is Andy's explanation Of
his success in raising swine, "and
believe that pigs, like jack rabbits.
can be taught to adapt themselves
to the changing climate. Note how
rabbits turn white in winter to
give them the benefit of low visi-
bility." A Darwinian student makes
good in a little city.
So -
P. D. Howell, the type-slinger
tells The Mysterious Scribe that he
is reading a mighty interesting
book. Says his whole outlook on
life has been changed by it. Got
so interested in reading the same
that he did not have time to shave
for a week. Looked something like
a member of the House of David
baseball team. Ask P. d. about it.
There is considerable curiosity a.
round Main Street over the identi-
ty of the Taxpayer who loves fair
play"-the fellow who called at
tention to nepotism in the court
house. BY the way, those who do
not twig the meaning of that terri
ble-sounding word, had better take
a trip to the library dictionary. A
lot of groundless suspicion will be
averted. The words all right.
a
Cecil Marsh, general factotum in
The Producers News office will be
a fireman some day. On press
night last week a blaze could be
seen rising into the sky in the Vi
cinity of the Bladder" printing
shop. 1t was feared that L. S. OF
sons typewriter had burst into
flames. For a moment it looked
like Ash MOor's house was on fire
but as soon as Ash learned that
his family was safe he went back
to his limo. Marsh, on the other
hand. dashed out like a fire horse
and fancy his embarrassment when
he discovered that it was only a
rubbish heap ablaze.
$3.50
It's going to be a hard Christ
mas for Tom and Jerry if the hon
est prohibitionist that Ted Winters
brought here as a Yuletide gift
continues to frisk passersby fer
liquor. Hundreds of eggs are wait !
ing for the beaten that would nor
mally amalgamate them into the
succulent beverage known to scott |
laws, of pre-VolStead DAYS. But
considering the ease with which a
little runt of a customs officer
went through Ed. Estes, citizens
OF less weight and standing are
likely to be cautious. A question
for lawyers: Has a prohibition Of
fieer a legal right to search a
mans person on the public high
way without warrant?
Jack Dwyer is receiving MANY
compliments these days for his
successful marathon a few weeks
ago. Jack does not look as husky
as Ed but he sure can run. He that
looks and runs away will live TO
run another day. Jack has gone
THE MYSTERIOUS SCRIBE.
Electrical Apnarat1,s IIsa-s