The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1929-03-18
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BY MARTHA LEE

How many times q WeIl-lnten-
toned mother dooms her child to
life Of misery and unhappiness
never will be known. There is no
way to take statistics on subjects
like that. But just the same, the
sum and total would be staggering,
I'll wager.
When I said "welI-intentioned,"
meant just that, too. When women
reach that age when their children
are about to marry, they have be-
come a bit cynical about romance,
spelled with capital R. Life has
for the most part, buffeted them
about enough to have knocked most
of loves young dreams galley-west.
They have suffered through years
of deprivation and hardships, real
or imagined, until they can see
nothing in the world more desirable
than comfortable security. And be-
cause they do love their sons and
daughters so much, they take it
upon themselves to see that nothing
like that ever comes TO them.
That's Just Rot
That isn't love, however. It's rot.
There are things so much more i'm
portant than being able to have a
new car every spring and a. trip
every summer to relieve the monot-
ony of marriage. After all, the
whole proposition would be more
monotonous than 365 days Of win
ter if there were nothing more to
the marriage than new car and a
trip once in a while.
Parents can stif1e the desire for
romance in their children, but I'M
fortunately they can not kill it, and
it often comes bounding back in the
most unexpected ways. Parents,
read this letter and profit by it:
Dear Miss Lee: am rs years old and
have been married for three years. All
in all, as I now realize. my troubles are
my own fault. I did not have the cour-
age to do what 7 wanted.
When was 81, was in love with a
very charming boy My parents liked
this boy, until I showed very evidently
that liked him better than another man,
some years older than I, who was paying
me marked attention.
When my mother and father were mar
ried, they were quite poor, and I know
that my mother was deprived of many
pleasures and a few necessities, because
they did not have the money to afford
them. After I was grown, they were in
moderate circumstances. and quite able
to do about what they pleased But the
memory of the lean years stayed with
my mother. She often had told me never
to marry poor man.
This boy loved was just out of school.
His profession was one that takes years
to build. He was poor, but had excel
lent prospects. The other man, the one
I eventually married, already was estab-
nshed. But did not love him. My mother
finally talked me into giving up the
younger boy and marrying the older one.
She told me I would learn to love him
after I was married.
And now three years have gone by and
do not love him any more than did
the day we we're married. I still love
the other boy. 1t is preying on my mind
to offer, without even returning the love
that husband deserves from his wife.
Do you think I should leave him? I have
no children.
DEsPoNDENT.
No, I do not think you should
leave him. You should have made
your mother realize the necessity
of your marrying the other boy,
rather than allowing her to make
you realize the expediency of mar
rying the man you have. After all,
it was a scheme on your mothers
part against this man who is your
husband. And you entered into it.
He's Out of Your Life
The other boy is out of your life
definitely. Undoubtedly you are also
out of his. do not imagine he
would be much f1attered at being
taken back after being turned down
because he was not able to give you
the things you and your mother
thought you deserved.
Because, you see; even though it
was your mother who haG things
figured out for you, it must look
pretty much to him like you thought
the same way.
You would better settle down and
make it a point to make your hus-
band happy. After all, you do owe
him at least gratitude, since you and
your mother both fooled him so
completely.