Brownsville herald. [volume] (Brownsville, Tex.) 1910-current, 1929-03-15
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QI lk4A New York I.R1N

NEW YORK, March 16.-In one
of the so-called gay places the
other sun-up a f~ree-for-all was
started after a stew flirted with
'the other feller's girl" Fists, bot
ties, glasses, ash trays, chairs and
small tables were hurled in all di-
rections, some Of them laying a
number Of whoopee-makers low.
Ten minutes later the hostess came
out of q safe nook and revived con-
fidence in the few survivors by YELL
ing: 1.-The fights over, folks! Won't
you all kindly go over and claim
your bodies?"
INCIDENTALLY
Speaking Of the local sin-dens,
we asked the owner of one Of them
how much the quart bottle of White
Rock cost him. "'They stand me
about % cents a BOTTLE" he re-
piled. land I get SO apiece for them
from the chumps."
You mean to say" we gasped,
that you ask three bucks for %
cent stuff"
"Why not?" was the indignant re-
tort, its pre-war!'
THE BROAD" WAY
She sneers who used to gayly smile,
She lies who once made truth
her say.
She jeers at what she thought
worth While
A not too distant day ...
And cynicism seem to be
The tomb Of her sincerity.
Carroll Carroll.
NIFTY
BY way of Fannie Brice and the
N. Y. press comes the fable Of the
two Irishman, two Scotchmen and
two Britons who we're stranded on
a desert island. At the end of six
months the rescuers discovered
that the Irishmen were at n end
of the island fighting, the Scots
had opened a bank in the middle,
while the Englishmen were glover
ing at each other at the other end
because they had not been prop
erly introduced.
GREAT SCOTT
w. w. Scott, who is responsible
for many Of the flip cracks in the
various humor mags, particularly
Life, forwards these:
Zero in the amusement value
a slow-motion talkie -. Waste of
time-a ventriloouist broadcasting
... Simile-Fell flat as a wisecrack
over the telephone -. And an opti-
mist is a Scotchman'S wife who
bought a dress on approval.
ADD B'WAY MELODIES
About five years ago they did a
sister act, aspiring for big time
recognition. After the usual strug-
gle in the smallies, they landed with
a revue named Keep Kool," and
were a hit. Offers poured in from
Ziegfeld and other leading pro-
ducers, but n of the gels fell
madly in love with a dance direc-
tor, who didn't have to persuade
her and her partner to head his
big time vaudeville act. Two months
later their romance went phffft!
but she remained with his act,
which toured the west.
You are forgotten quickly on
Broadway, you know, when you
have been absent from it for a
spell, and because one of the team
of very able dancers fell for that
great big thing some people call
love, golden opportunities were
snubbed.
They landed with an ordinary
show which stranded. They flop
ped in a cafe or two, and last night
we learned that one Of them now
is in the chorus Of a showt tina
| just drew sour notices in Philadel-
phia, and the one who loved and
lost will call at a second rate night
club this evening-to give an audi
ton!
THE CRACK DANDY
The vogue in Hollywood every
week end is to hire a plane and
fly to Aqua Caliente, a Wide-open
village in Mexico, where men are
wuff and women are vicious. The
little town is certainly w1or open,
with gambling and liquor being the
choice diversions.
One day last October, when
Texas Guinan was in Hollywood. a
Frenchman who was paying his ini-