davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-02-15
youths Companion.
Mixed

From head to heel she was ex-
uuisitely modern, and the shopwalkes
to whom this fair young thing had
beckoned felt his heart beat alk thi
faster at the honor done him.
She asked him where she could get
"pencils for the eyebrows"
The shopwalker was inclined 10
deafness, and he misunderstood her.
'0The stationery section is upstairs
madam" he began.
s'But 1 want them for eyebrows,
interrupted the slim young woman
somewhat puzzled.
"Oh, highbrow stuff! Better ASK
them at the book counter" w
London Answers.
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-02-15
More Truth Than Poetry
BY JAMES J. MONTAGUE
DISAPPOINTMENT

have harbored the hope that at
sixty
I'd become so deficient in zest,
would weakly recoil from all man
ner OF toll
And give myself over to rest.
At sixty, always imagined
Old fellows might take blissful maps
Upon old easy chairs, while their
lusty young heirs
Poured Iuxuries into their laps.
For years have keenly looked for
ward
To the time when my task should
be done
And I'd gladly retire to the side of
my fire
Or, in summer, a place in the sun.
Or to bask by the brim OF some
brooklet
At turn where the trout love to
lurk
And the soft summer breeze played a
tune on the trees
Forgetting the dreadful word work
Alas for my dreams of the future!l
These bothersome scientists say
That at sixty, man should be lead
ing the van
OF the worlds greatest workers to-
day.
The drag OF the years has no power
His muscles or brains to destroy
At the age of three score he can do q
lot more
Than he could as husky young
boy!
No longer I look toward the future
AS time of delightful release
While, whenever please, I can loll
at my ease
And my wearisome labors shall
cease.
If toll to the end of existence
Shall continue its nerve-racking
hold
On my sinews and mind, while slave
at the grind
I'm afraid I don't want to grow
old!
EASY
The trouble maker never has to
learn his trade.
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-02-15
From the Bargain Viewpoint

Judge: Well, John, I can give you
this divorce, but it will cost you So.
John: Three dollars, boss?
Judge: That's the fee.
John: Well, boss, 1 jes' tell va. l
don't believe 1 wants no divorce.
There amt So differences tween dem
two winonen. Exchange.
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-02-15

Auntie: Wont you have another
piece OF cake, Willie?"
mo, thank you"
"Are you suffering with your stom-
ach?"
mo, auntie, I'm suffering from po-
liteness'
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-02-15
ABE MARTIN

'WelI, that's nObuddy's business
as long as he don't send out in
vitatiOns," said Tell Binkley, when
he heard o. tn Connecticut felier
thafd married 16 different women.
Colonel Lindbergh has got 1t all
over other celebrities. He kin ex-
cuse himself T. work on his engine.
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-02-15
A case for a SpeciaIist

'srhe boy of mine is at home this
wear for the first time since he went
away to college and he's worrying us
to death. He gets up every morning
at s o'clock, goes out to the foundry
and works there all day. He says he's
learning the business. 1 can't get him
tc see q doctor.
'He hasn't gone to dance this
year. And what do you think we
found him doing yesterday? Putting
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-02-15
Foolish Question

A negro cook in one OF our southern
states answered the telephone one
morning, and cheerful voice in
o11ired. ''What number is this?"
The cook was in no mood 1of
trifIing questions, and said, with some
asperity, "Ycu-all ought to know. YOU
done called it."
YOUTHS Companion.
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-02-15
Anu Change Better

Specialist: 1 assure you, madame,
my course will make an entirely diff
ferent woman out OF you.
Clients Husband: That settles it.
Take it, Margaret-never mind the
cost. Pathfinder.
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-02-15

"They say she has decided to marry
a struggling young author"
"Well, If she has decided, he may
as well stop struggling"
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-02-15

Kitty was too small to play soldier
with the other children, but she want
ed to and set up an awful yell.
Willie: Aw, let her play; she cal1
be the widows and orphans.
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-02-15

Speaking of former employee whc
is now rival and competitor: Blake
is sharper, a thief and liar, and
/ taught him all he knows.
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-02-15
A "Genteel" Phrase

A Bowling Green personal item
mentions a former Elizabethtown lady
as having her mother as her "house
guest" UP here we never take 'em to
the barn.
-Elizabethtown (Ky) News.
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-02-15
PZucked From the Plains

up the top Of his automobile. 1t had
been down for three years and the
parts were SC rusty it took him three
hours.
I'm paying him just whas we pay
any of the hands out at the foundry
and he never asks me for any money
He's in bed every night at 1890 and
spends a lot of his time reading. /
wouldn't be scared myself, but his
mother told me she thought he'd be,
gun to wear garters again. So it
really looks serious"
BaffIed Ambition
Janet: 1 went to the doctor again
today and he said they wouldn't have
to operate after all.
jeanette: What a pity, my dear,
I'm so sorry.
Came Envy
I greatly dislike the picture folk
They seem so superciliously arrogant
or is it arrogantly supercilious?
Well, anyhow, they are.
Achieving stardom on the tilt of q
nose, the cast Of an eye or the turn
of an ankle.
And wearing fur coats and royal
iiadems; living in gorgeous palaces
for which the public pays and drink
ing lavishly Of beverages that should
be no nearer to us than Mexico or
Canada.
Forever having themselves photo
graphed for the rotogravure sections
and paying large sums to smart young
~, 70 o1a ohOIIf flan1
Making personal appearances" al
theatres in bid for greater popu-
lar1ty and brazenly assuring their
audiences they are always glad to re.
ceive letters-then hiring secretaries
to answer them and autograph pic
lures.
Yes; greatly dislike the picture
folk.
And I would give my right arm to
be one OF them.
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-02-15
MARCHING MUSIC

MARCHING MUSIC
What the newest democratic presi-
dental boom needs most is a concert
OF Reed organs.
Copyright, 1928, Bell Syndicate, Inc)
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-02-15
WALTON for Dad

Her Father: Do you think you can
support my daughter in the way she
has been brought up?
Her Suitor: All except her smoking
and gambling at bridge and she's
promised to stop both.
-Capper's Weekly.
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-02-15

Mother: I told you never to kiss
a man unless you were engaged.
Helen: Well, I'm engaged tc Bob
so I guess it's all right to kiss Jack.
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-02-15

DR.. A. R. Hickman, former chief
of the local staff Of the Copper
Queen company, is in the city
from his home in Los Angeles.
DR.. Hickman has become bene-
dict since leaving Douglas and was
receiving congratulations OF friends
yesterday.
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-02-15

Mr.. and Mrs. H. H. B. Colley
arrived home yesterday from New
London, Conn.,, where they have
been visiting for six weeks.
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-02-15

mo more Texas climate for me
in the winter time when I can
enjoy the balmy climate of Doug
las" said Mrs. M D.. Teachout
Yesterday on her return from Cor
pus Christi.
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-02-15

ANOTHER RAID ON THE
BANKROLL
Now the children expect father to
go out and do his part in the great
motor war.
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-02-15

Probably the first couple to be
married in the new state were
united yesterday by Judge Rice
lust as the whistles announced the
fact OF statehood. The couple were
Miss Myrtle Walker and Frank
Cramer, residents of Cottonwood
canyon.
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-02-15
SIXTEEN YEARS AGO

When the flash came YESTERDAY
morning that President Taft had
signed the statehood proclamation
admitting Arizona to the union
whistles were blown and the bells
rung in this city. Save for that
demonstration there was little ex-
citement.
Evening star., 1928-05-03
UNITED STATES
in WORLD WAR
Ten Years Ago To-day.

War Department plans contemplate
having 10000 officers and 2,l6S,000
men in the field and in camps by July
and approximately another million to
be placed in the field before July !,
1919. All Army camps and cam
tonments will be enlarged and II trans
portation facilities continue to improve
as they have in recent months the
United States will have close TO l,50O,-
600 men in France by the end OF the
year. Five American airplanes
engage in spectacular battle with five
German planes over the American
sector this morning with even honors.
After one American plane was shot
down in flames and one German plane
fell the rest of the enemy retired within
their own lines. Gigantic opera
tions are going on back of the American
lines. Three hundred and fifty thou
sand tons of materials were handled
by the transportation department in
April Huge storage facilities almost
completed and big docks and railroads
are nearly finished. Eighty
eight casualties in today'S list.
French and British push forward in
the Amiens sector. Gen. Petain wins
south of the Avre and occupies Hill 80,
near Castel. and the wood along the
river. Heavy artillery combatS went on
last night and continue today IN region
between Hangard and Villers-Breton-
neux, in some of which the French have
the advantage.
Evening star., 1928-05-03
A Contrast in Aviation.

While Washington was entertaining
the Two German flyers and their Irish
companion IN celebration III their feat
in crossing the Atlantic from east 10
west and while the greatest flyer Of
them ali, Col Charles A. Llndbergh.
who biazed the way across The ocean.
was assisting in the ceremonies sig
nitieant event wak taking place at Kitty
Hawk. ~ C., on wiDd-swept beach
There yesterday a modest monument
Nas unveiled, and on II Is inscribed
On this spot September i7th, 1900
Wilbur Wright began the assembly Of
the Wright Brothers first experimental
glider ~hich led 10 mans conquest of
the air. Erected by citizens Of Eitty
Hawk. North Carolina, 1928"
a greater contrast IN aviation eele-
bfstion could hardly he imagined lhsn
j tfs welcome ~ the overseas flyers and
tie erection III a monument 20 the Two
brothers who fifkt mastered the laws
~ the sir A. relating 10 man-made
| planes Three years after that day
when Wilbur snd oryilie Wright sci
Hp their tent 10 begin work on their
/ new tangled c0nlfiyanee Ofgille made
/ ihe first successful night IN q power,
driven plane. Out of breath from run.
! ming and from excitement, life guard
buTsl into t9s village on December ~
Evening star., 1928-05-03

1908, and screamed at the top Of his
voice, They've done 1t! DANCED If they
amt fiew!"
This first airplane was wobbly af-
fair, 1t was propelled by q four-cyl-
inder motor and the pilot was supported
mainly by small seat on network
of wires. Its greatest flight covered a
distance OF eight hundred and fifty-two
feet. Little did the crazy" brothers
realize what aviation was to become to
the world They could have no con-
ception of the forces that they set into
motion. In 1908 veering, erratiC
fight of little more than eight hum
dred feet! In 1927 fight from New
York to Germany, straight rs die for
more than thirty-nine hundred miles!
In 1903 an altitude of perhaps a hun
drcd feet! In 1927 man scared into
the heavens 10 ceiling of thirty-eight
thousand feet! And in 1908 a speed
of possibly fifty miles an hour! In
Italy last year an Italian ace flew for
one lap at three hundred and fifty
miles all hour.
It is a striking contrast, and the
world, which in the enthusiasm for
newer sensations is inclined to forget
should consider we'll the beginning of
it all. Wilbur Wright has passed on to
a oreater reward OrViile Wright is
still living and it must be wonderful
satisfaction to him to observe a deyel-
opment OF the contraption that was
born at Kitty Hawk. The erection OF
the monument there is singularly ap-
propriate, and coming at a time when
new deeds in the air are being ac-
claimed, should serve to remind us all
that at that spot the idea became an
actuality which made these deeds pos
Sible.
Evening star., 1928-05-03
Steam-H Heated Roads.

With all States realizing the neces-
sity of keeping the roads open. Winter
and Summer for the vital tranSporta-
ton needs Of the Nation. 1t is interest
ing to note that Nevada is to expert
ment with steam-heated Winter high
ways. A sixteen-mile stretch of road in
that State, near Reno. is almost perpet-
ually blocked during severe weather. A
county commissioner, evidently for
ward looking man. has determined that
snow shall no longer hamper this trans
portation artery. and a San Francisco
heating engineer has been engaged to
consider ways and means of installing
pipes along the road to melt the white
flakes as soon as they fall.
While the scheme may not prove fea-
sible, it should at least serve as an OBJ
ject lesson to certain localities which
have not yet come to the realization
that modern business demands year
round passable roads Before the days
of truck and passenger car transporta-
tlon in connection with the business ac-
tivities of the Nation. little was thought
about snow removal. When Winter
came the roads were blocked. and that
was all there was to it. Now. however,
the city or State which does not
promptly clear its highways is derelict
in its duty. and consequently Nevadas
eypari-,ept y,ext Winter will he watched
with interest.
Evening star., 1928-05-03

at which former Mayor Hylan Is ex-
pected TO declarcN his independent can
iidacy for the mayoralty as champion
OF the five-cent rate.
The intervention of the Federal Court
was brought about through denial by
the state rapid transit commission of
the cempany's application for higher
fare The company. claiming that the
rate of fare was eonfiscatory, sought and
obtained access to the United States
Court on the ground Of a denial of
constitutional rights. The case now
having entered the Federal jurisdiction.
the way is open to appeal TO the highest
court Should that court sustain the
decision Of the special court which has
lust ruled. the day Of the flve-cent fare
rate in the United states may be re-
garded as closed Other cities than
New York are. therefore, interested III
this contention.
Evening star., 1928-05-03
The Appropriations Chairmanship.

With the death of Representative
Martin 3. Madden, which occurred
with shocking suddenress last week
the chairmanship of the House COM
mittee on appropriations, a position OF
great Importance. passes by virtue OF
seniority and merit to Representative
Daniel r Anthony. Jr" OF kansas
Formal action to that effect will short
" be taken by the House committee on
committees and the chairmanship VIII
be- vested in Mr.. Anthony, who how
ever. has been for some time IN poor
health and unable to attend the scs-
sions Of the House. 1t is not expected
that Mr.. Anthony will be present IN
WASHINGTON during the remainder OF
the current session. Should he recover
from his illness he will at the next seS-
sion take the chair IN .he appropria-
lions committee, with whicn he has
been associated for several Congresses.
and on which he has rendered valuable
service. Meanwhile the actual duties
Of this Office will be discharged by Rep
resentative William r. Wood of Indiana
next in seniority, and. by virtue OF long
service on the appropriations commit
tee. fully competent to carry Oh the
late Mr.. Madden's work in directing the
activities of the committee.
Mr.. Wood. who in the event Of the in
ability Of Mr. Anthony 10 return TO
active congressional service. VIII un-
doubtedly be continued as chairman at
the next session. has been in Congress
now for thirteen years and during most
of that time has been assigned to ap-
preparation committee duty. He is per-
fectlv familiar with the budgetary WORK
of Congress and through his various
subcommittee assignments has become
acquainted in detail with all the bills
His parliamentary equipment is excep-
tional. and under his manaeenent, II
it should continue. the expeditions ana
effective enactment Of these essential
measures is assured. For the present
session the greater part of the work
has been accomplished, there remaining
only the deficiency bill to be laid before
the House. all others having been
passed by that body, five having become
laws.
The District of Columbia is grstifed
that the craftsmanship Of the appropri-
ations committee, whether retained oy
Mr.. Anthony, for whose recovery ana
return it prays, or by Mr., Wood in sue
cession, will be held by one who Is an
advocate of justice to the Capital COM
munitv in the matter of the fiscal re-
lations between it and the United
States
Evening star., 1928-05-03
THIS AND THAT
BY CHARLES E. TRACEWELL.

The other fellow is always wrong.
Strangely enough, he usually Is! This
is the queer part of it.
X X =
It is probably good thing that for
every remark that reaches the ears OF
an offender 10 do not, but remain en-
tirely inside the car.
All the other fellow gets in most in
stances is a glare, a facial distortion
expressive of extreme disapproval.
Mrs. j. Henry Gearshift, charming
lady. who drives a small car of popu-
lar make smiles at all the traffic cops
and glares at all the motorists.
Her glare. by the way. is a rather
peculiar thing half way between smile
and a frown. if you know what We mean.
1t is much better to be frowned at by
Mrs. Gearshift than not to be noticed
at all. most acquaintance think.
When she gets behind the wheel she
is on her way. Her opinions of other
drivers are not complimentary, II one
may judge from what she says about
them
And she says a plentyi
Get out of the way!" she yells in her
dulcet soprano, which sounds like a
brook trying to initiate a saXophone. or
like canary bird trying to emulate
the strains of violin.
Her voice is the sort that carries, yet
does it Sweetly. Some voices are like
that.
The motoriSt does not have all the
fun by himself, however.
The pedestrian has something to say,
too
Since all men are walkers at times
and upon occasion. there is q peculiar
appeal in the remarks hurled at passed
automobiles.
We say passed" because that is the
case. In 80 cases out of 100, by the
time the indignant pedestrian has
hurled forth his sentiments the offender
is half way down the block.
To be nearly cut down forever by
some careless motorist who really
doesn't care would be the crowning in
suit
And the only way to avoid such a
fate, as every one knows, is to be always
on guard. One steps off curb only
to have his trouser leg famed by a car
making a right-hand turn at 80 miles
an hour.
You -" roars the startled pedes-
trian.
Inc TeaueT mere Is elllltleu 10 iii Out
the blank according to his own senti-
ments In the matter If you are one of
these motorists who believe that the
motorist is always right, just leave it
blank. Likewise. If you are pedestrian
who thinks that the motorist is always
wrong.
~
Only once did we ever fail to express
-. g. .{x.sgN
of an offending motorist.
We had passed out between cars
parked on the north side of PennSyl-
vania avenue on our way 10 the car
platform.
AS We got behind car something
caught our eye. We won't say what 1t
was. but will say that it was not the
Post Office Department Building.
While we were taking what is known
in the vernacular as "a good look" the
man started to back his car out.
He did 1t very gently, thank Heaven!
And we didn't have the heart to say
thing.
Evening star., 1928-05-03

"Where in the world are you going
with that beautiful big carp" yelled the
taxicab driver as he slid his vehicle
to a violent stop. :
It is needless to say that his words
were not exactly as quoted above. For
world" the aStute reader Will subStl-
tute another and hotter place; for the
adiectives he will make the necessary
notifications. :,
If experience enables him to do all
this successfully, he will see that what
the taxi driver roared at the man in
the small green car was almost poetical.
This is the astounding thing about
the remarks that automobilistS hurl at
each other. Whether heard or not
heard-and the relation is about to
l0-most of the remarks are picturesque.
Evidently one of the joys of driving
an automobile Is this free expression
of opinion concerning the character and
driving ability of other motorists.
Other cars, too. must stand a great
deal of raging No matter how fine
bus the other fellow is operating, 1t be-
comes q can" or a wreck or some
similar misfit when it appears in the
denunciations hurled by one driver at
another.
We recall the case of two men whose
cars almost met head-on at Fourteenth
and K streets This is bad corner,
anyway. in traffic parlance, The merits
of the case are forgotten; what we re-
member is the remark of the taxi
driver.
He leaned out the side of his car
and angrily confronted the driver OF
one of the finest automobiles IN wash
ington. It was n beautiful car, as
shiny as the ones you see sitting proudly
in the show windows.
Get that wreck out of my way!"
chorused the taXicab driver In sublime
indifference to the reputation and price
of the other car. He knew about the
price and the reputation, but in the ex-
pressive manner Of all automobile
"bawlers out" Intentionally phrased his
language in reverse.
Does the power of the engine trans
nit itself to the men at the wheel?
Does he feel that an ordinary recogni-
ton of facts is incompatible with so
horsepower?
This running down" Of the other
fellows car is the ordinary procedure
with hundreds of motorists, most of
whom by no means would stand on their
two feet and similarly traduce the car
owners themselves.
Some motorists keep up running
fire of chatter against all their brother
and siSter-motoriSts.
It is delightful TO listen to one of
them go on.
They ought to take that fellows
permit away from him" exclaims our
hero as he is forced to veer his car as
much as a quarter OF an inch.
Look at that boob drive! Why, he
couldn't drive threshing machine!
They ought to stop giving permits to
such fellows.
Watch him take that curVe-the
hog He thinks he owns the whole
road. There are too many like him In
this city.
Say, you fathead, where you going?
Did you see that? That bozo would
take the right of way away from his
grandmother. The next time see him
I'm gonna bump him good"
So 1t goes.
Evening star., 1928-05-03
The Fiye-Cent Fare Decision.

After q long flgit. the marlborough
Rapid Transit Co Of New York has won
1 judicial decision against the contin-
bance Of the flye-cent rate of fare. A
lpeclally constituted Federal Court has
kgled IN favor Of the company's appli-
patton 10 charge q seyen-cent rate on
b. subway and elevated lines, this deci-
tlon being subject 10 review Dy the
United States Supreme Court. II Is
pertain that an appeal viii be taken
knd that the whole question viii be re-
TERED " the highest court. This Sqii
Involve a complicated situation. II the
patutofy court. which ruled yesterday
tgrs ar order putting the seyen-eeD.
tare INTO effect st onoe. subject 10 the
higher court . ruling. the company mhS'
klve tYo-cent rebate slips With every
token xficn II Rlls fedeemsbIe by ue
passenger In case the flye-cent rate h.
restored On ti1e other hand, the
statutory court DEGREES that the five-
teft fafe shall remain pending feFiFw
he city must give bond for reimburse-
eaent " he company IN case the ult'-
nate decision is favorable 10 the latter
h. tlae former case the passengers Will
receives refund, sn6 In the latter case
be eity treasurer VIII psy the differ
tncf n has been figured that the
addition of two cents " the fare rate
tfll eoet the passengers approximately
k4o 0g0 600 year Should the city b.
k,ndea fn the event that the f1Ye~ceni
kre remains pending appeal snd the sp'
eesl results IN q decision faVorabls n,
BE- company. 3 heavy burden @iil b.
Dlaced upon the municipality unless the
lg1eal Is unusually expedited A. truce
hoveser may be arranged 10 avoid tIi'
Contingency
Immediately upon tie rendering d
b. decision yesterday. Mayor Walker
tAo haA stouuy resisted aii moves fo
b. increase la fares. announced that ~
eoJlo stand for reelection on I'VE
tenf fare platform Int il inieFfklipi
b. conjunction with reports That Ielsn
Ave been mace for 3 dinner neat Esek