New Britain herald., 1928-10-20
MARY ANN GETS
 JOB AS 4 MAID
Her Duty Being to Tikt Cirt
 of the Youngsters
(Contributed)

You probably wonders where I'm working now that lost my job as telephone operator on account of giving . customer wrong num- bers in succession as he was trying to get a call to let the hrs dept. know his garage was on fre. How was I to know it was my bo1s's garage that was on hre? If I'd known it was him I would of been more careful and probably have got the correct number after the 3rd or 9th attempt. Anyways I'm now working as . maid to the Berries on No Gas Ave. They calls me the second maid on account of being the End they've had this month. The other one eloped with tho chauffeur and an expensive vic- trola.
 Part of my job is to take care e1 the kiddies and I'll tell the comiAl world they're the berries. Every day is circus day for the kids and they keep me busier than an artist sketching . flying plane. After grabbing little Oswald by the legz and pulling the rest of him from under the kitchen stove, where he was hitting the pipes with . ham, mer and making an awful racket playing plumber. I rushes into the parlor and finds young Oscar squeezed behind the piano in . suc- cessful attempt to hide from Lena, who is perched on the top of 1t with legs hanging down. trying to do a solo.
 Little Johnny was playing lins- man and had climbed to the top of the hatrack. and while straddling it loses his balance and both topple over in time to block traffic for Jerry. who had slid down the ban. mister from upstairs. I untagies the little dears and peace once more reigns, only to be broken by Oscar, the year old hopeful, who is yell ing Justify because the cat which he was holding by . corner leg scratched him. The kiddies then begin playing soldiers (the Berries alone almost forming one squad) and invites the youngsters next door to join their company.
 Jerry. the eldest. elected himself captain and led his army, all outa step. from one room to tho other. As the army passes through . door way. little Oscar. who had been . straggler throughout the march. takes . shortcut and finds himself leading. The captain orders him to the rear and when he stubbcrnly refuses to obey orders is court mar tialed and put in the guardhouse. . clothes closet. After almost kicking the panels outa the door he is re- leased and sprawls out in . heap, with the Mrs.'s best silk dress wrap ped around him. T1me h called while squad is detailed to untansle his feet from the dress sleeves. The dress looked like what was left of . torn college pennant and when the Mrs.'s sees 1t what she'll throw won't be compliments.
 Not finding army life exciting enough the company disbands, only to form . tribe of indians. One of the neighbor's kids hurried home and returns with . package of her big sisters rouge and soon all tho warriors faces are smeared with war-paint, not to mention the wall paper and furniture. A biz pow wow is held on tle library floor. fol- lowed by . war dance and | whoop- ing of shrill voices that would of woke any watchman. The young braves and squaws then rush out into the yard and surround Bowser. tho pedisreed pup. Bowser who has always been welcomed by the kiddies. fails to recognize them and putting his tail between his legs, gives . yelp of terror and gallops outa the yard and down the street.
 The tired but happy tribe returns without . captive and makes . raid on the cookie jar. Every kid for himself and may the last one take the smallest. We'll. Andy. I'll close now by saying it's . great life if you don't weaken.
 MARY ANN.