The monitor., 1928-02-10

mere are great many uIFOTceS III
this country and back of every di-
vorce there must of necessity be end
less heartaches and much wreckage.
Wedding days that were looked for
ward to as the beginning of bliss now
become days of bitter memories, and
joy seems to have fled from life.
Causes Back of Divorce
Now there are certain definite
causes which lead up to most of these
divorces and young men and women
should have presented to them the
things which may be at the root Of
the trouble, so that, if possible, they
will not fall blindly into the same
costly errors which make wreck Of
life and destroy happiness. | am in
terested in your happiness and there
fore | am calling these things to your
attention. You may agree or not,
but at least | want you to think over
these things very carefully They rep
resent certain conclusions | have
come to after nearly 25 years of nly
priesthood, during which time | have
been appealed to in innumerable
cases of marital disaster.
Character Is Basic
There is trite old saying that
the battle of Waterloo was won on
the playing fields of Eton. In the
same sense, marriages succeed or fail
in great measure according to the
characters we have built up in our
boyhood and girlhood days, for it is
that character that we offer at the
altar to our chosen partner. That is
our chief gift at the solemn time.
Among the many things which go to
affect our character, think that
most men are agreed that our re-
lationship to God has deeper effect
than anything else, if we will let it..
Life is not an easy game; it is very
difficult and God never intended US
to play it alone. Our prayers and our
sacraments bring God into our lives
and give us an incalculable power for
overcoming and mastering our selfish
animal natures.
Man, living alone without God, is
instinctively selfish, and selfishness
is a reef more dangerous to marriage
than Norman's woe. When God be-
comes our partner, little by little self
is overcome and we develop a char
acter which has regard for the other
fellow. We learn to consider his
wishes, we learn to give and take, we
learn to assume our proper place in
society.
Study Family
Study carefully the family of the
one you think of marrying. You are
not just marrying an individual. You
are, and you cannot avoid it, marry
ing into a family, and while one in
dividual in family may differ from
the rest in many ways, basically all
members of family are of one blood
and their general traits are a good
deal alike. The family habits will
most likely creep out in the individ-
ual who has been brought up in that
atmosphere. Family training will
very largely persist in each member
of family who has lived long time
at home.
In. all that / am saying, there are,
of course, exceptions, but exceptions
merely prove the rule. Note the ply
sical characteristics of the family. 1t
is their blood in part that will enter
into the life of your children. 1t
would be the greatest folly for two
people to marry if on both sides there
was similar physical weakness.
Children might inherit the double
weakness of both parents. Many
states now go into this matter and re,
quire physical health certificate be-
fore granting a marriage license, all
for the purpose of guaranteeing, so
far as is possible, strong bodies to the
coming genration.
Don't Marry to Reform Partner
Don't marry to reform or help re-
form your partner. 1t sounds very
noble and heroic but the chances are
80 to one against success. When two
people are approaching or think they