The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1928-06-14
KEEPING UP
With
THE NE WIS
81 LUDWELL DENNY

BY LUDWELL DENNY
u ANSAS CITY, June 14.-This
IN is a convention Of myths. The
rumors don't tell, The issues are
camouflaScd.
Myth: That it was going to be
a good show.
Fact: 1t flattened out early. So
far there is little color, little eX-
element, little tenseness.
Myth: That Senator-elect Ware,
notorious Philadelphia boss, caused
the stampede for Hoover, becoming
thus the "President-maker."
Fact; Calvin Coolidge started the
band wagon when he knocked down
the fake draft-Coolidge barrier All
the red-faced Ware did was to an
nounce, a few hours before Multi
millionaire Mellon was ready, that
Pennsylvania seventy-nine dele
gates, bereft of Coolidge, had no
place else to go except to Hoover.
Uncle Andy was just as ready as
Ware to get on the winning side, but
he wanted to hold the spotlight as
the strong silent man a few hours
longer. So while he Rugged his
fame, the upstart boss outsmarted
him. The result doubtless is i'm
portant in terms of Pennsylvania
State politics, but it didn't make
Hoover.
MYTH: That Kansas City is a
1VA hot hole in June,
Fact: You need a top coat at
night and sleep under blankets. The
air is invigorating, the skies blue,
the far hills clear and good % look
upon.
Myth: That Dawes is a farm
leader.
Fact: Banker Dawes didn't get a
hand when hundreds of delegates
and citizens of this center of the
farm belt watched Charlie with his
upside down pipe flicker on the
movie screen.
While his managers talk and
trade with other politicians for their
dark horse candidate, who wants the
presidency or vice presidency or
what have you, the farm delegates
are Indifferent to him.
Myth: That Kansas City is dry.
Fact: CAS- reported by authorita-
tive sources other than this writer).
Bootleggers are plentiful but don't
crowd you off the main street as in
certain Eastern cities. Also the
reliable" liquor merchants are
snobs, insisting on your family pedi-
gree, state of servitude and moral
character before trusting you.
Once a member Of the invisible
band of elect, you are given a check
"a brass check. 1t is numbered.
You telephone your order, Identify
ing yourself as number whatever
you are. In a few minutes you are
called for veriflcation of your order
and number. The bourbon is good,
the Scotch not so good, and the rye
makes you wake up on New Years
day with Billy Sunday resolutions
and oaths.
Myth: That Charlie Curtis is
IVA a clever politician.
Fact: The rcsh political writer's,
technically known as trained
seals" and the only newspaper men
allowed to call themselves Journal
lists and wear canes and spats, took
a chance on Curtis thirty years OF
unerring astuteness.
But Charles foot slipped or his
mustache got in his eyes Monday
morning when he swung OUT Of the
Union Station-which, by the way,
is "the largest and finest in the
world" like every ether American
terminal built in the last decade
or so.
Anyway, here was Charles on the
station platform, ready to enter the
Promised Land Ex-jockey, hum
dred per cent American by the
blood of his great-great grand
father Kaw. Senator Chief Sem
ate floor leader He was ready to
cash in on his long party service
and fence straddling. He had
worked himself into a strategic po-
sition as a compromise candidate,
or as Hoover's running mate, by
voting for the McNary- Haugen
farm relief bill and then turning
around and voting to uphold The
Coolidge veto.
Then the political moonshine
went to the soberest head in the
business. He announced that what
ever the party did it could not
nominate a man for whom it would
have to apologize-meaning Hoo
yer. And that is the end of Char
lie Unless, of course. Herbert re-
members his Quaker upbringing
and turns the other cheek, permit
ting Charlie to ride in second place,
NEYTH: That silver dollars have
lVl gone out of circulation.
Fact. You have to re-enforce
your trouser pockets to carry the
cart wheels that every Parisian-
bloused cashier rolls back at you
in change.
Myth: That 100000 irate farmers
were Fording it to Kansas City 10
force a NIcNary- Haugen farm relief
plank into the platform and pre-
vent Hoover's nomination.
Fact: Only 500 arrived-most in
Bucks or better. They are net