Evening star., 1928-04-04
THIS AND THAT
BY CHARLES E. TRACEWELL.

canny the way these pests managed to
seat themselves directly in front OF him,
or by his side, so that when they
sneezed openly. without recourse to
handkerchief, the germ-laden spray in
variably showered him.
Once Gearshift caught himself wish
ing that he had never heard of the
germ theory He had good imagina-
tion and 1t took no particular effort on
his part to see millions Of StalWart
young germs impelling themselves down
his bronchial tubes, kicking themselves
along with their little legs and arms.
Our hero had undergone pneumonia
three times, the last time combination
of the influenza, bronchial pneumonia
and pleurisy. 1t had been the only such
case In the city. the doctor told him.
Gearshift had been doubtful of the
honor at the time but, when he got up
at last ne managed to take considerable
pride in his threefold ailment. THE
! only case In the District like 1t" he said
1t was scarcely to be wondered at.
then, that he gazed with suspicion on
those who sneezed their way downtown
or applauded at theaters and concerts
with whoopings in their various stages.
On his way downtown Gearshift had
a choice of four seats He looked his
prospective busmateS over with a care
full, trained eye. All looked healthy, but
one more SO than the others. Beside
him he sat.
Ker-cheWr' went the man, exactly
one minute after GearShift sat down
Our careful hero stopped breathing at
once. as was his custom, and immedi-
ately transferred himself to the back of
the bus, beside the second healthiest-
looking individual.
1t was minutes and 80 seconds later
that the seatmate began to fish in his
overcoat pocket for handkerchief. but
he could not find 1t in time. They never
do (Private remark of j. Henry Gear
shift)
'ker-Chewi" went the second healthi-
est fellow, all over Gearshift. This time
our hero left the vehicle altogether and
walked the remainder of the way to
work.
Gearshift particularly hated to be
sneeZed on at luncheon, but had long
ago discovered that restaurant was
one of the favorite SneeZing grounds of
the Great SneeZers.
This time, however, J. Henry Gear
shift felt he was safe There were only
few men in the place, when he en-
tered, so scattered around, in the usual
futile effort of mankind to secure
privacy in public. that he was a good
10 feet or more from every other eater.
He selected a table near a large fell
low who appeared to be in the tan OF
health. tWhy should health always be
'pink?") He put his mug down on
the porcelain with the utmost trust and
confidence in humanity.
"Ker- -chew!" went the big fellow.
'Ker-chew!"
Ten feet. thought Gearshift, Is not so
much when 1t comes to one of these
tanned fellows from the great open
spaces. So he grabbed his mug and re-
treated to another table, not far from
man whom he knew by sight. who
had never been known to Sneeze.
Gearshift drank his coffee in peace
He had a satisfied sense of being out
side the zone of hurtful influence. Here,
at least was freedom from cold germs
Yonder human being was never known
"Ker-chew!" beloved the man, turn
ing his face directly in Gearshifts way
''Ker-chew! Ker-chew!"
When J. Henry got home that eve
ming his wife asked: Well. what did
YOU do today?"
Il have been playing the old woman
OF Tennessee" he grinned.