davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
New Britain herald., 1928-05-03
THU NE.t>ESr OI IT RNS

Driving an automobile along a city boulevard Is one thlng trying 10 get upon the boulel ard from 3 side street is quite another.
 Making a turn from q side street onto the boulevard crowded with fast moving chariots subtracts consider a ble JOY out of driving. Those who have tried 10 squeeze into West Main street from any of the side streets west of the park while travel is at it's height can youch for the fact that there is great deal in life that is easier and much more satisfactory.
 Sooner or later some way must be found to solve this difficulty, Drivers from side streets know they have some rights, but when traffic is heavy along the main stem they have difficulty in finding their rights. They arc forced to gamble with chance and court accident, and the longest way-patiently waiting for an opening to be the only safe way of gaining their ends.
 The difficulty would solve itself to a certain extent f the drivers spinning along the boulevard would show a tendency to give the others a chance occasionally; but that rare- ly happens, as everybody on the boulevard seems automatically to be in a terrible hurry.
New Britain herald., 1928-05-03
Observations On Te Weather

Washington, May 3.--Forecast for Southern New Eneland: Fair to- night and Friday. Little change in temperature. Gentle north and mort heast winds, shifting to south- cast and south.
 Forecast for Eastern New York: Partly cloudy tonight and Friday Probably showers in extreme north portion. Warmer tonight
 Conditions: The long trough or low rressilr" in the western and central districts is moving slowly eastward. Its northern center IS over Lake Superior. HonEbton, Mich ca.7o inches. The southern center is over the Texas Pan-IIandle, Amsr- were reported from portions of the plains states. the northern Missis- sippi valley, upper lake region and northern New England. The area of high pressure east of the Mis- sissippi river centers over inc -Ap- palachian highlands There has been a general increase in pressure ir all portions of the country dur ing the past 12 hours except over the upper lake region. Tcmpera- lures remain moderate in the central and eastern districts but are lower over the Rocky Mountains and western plains states.
 Conditions favor pr this vicinity fair weather and not much change in temperature.
 L
New Britain herald., 1928-05-03

ters not how strait the gate, How charged with punishment the scroll. I am the master of my fate. I am the captain of my soul"
 Q. Is there verse in the Bible that reads: Woe unto you law yers"?
 A. Yes. Luke 11:46 and 5o.
 c. Who invented the electric chair?
 A. It was not really an invention. It was known that electric current would kill and experiments in kill ing various animals by this means were made under the supervision of George E. Fell of Buffalo. N. Y. A New York commission. consisting of Elbridge Gerry. A. P. Southwick and Matthew Hale was appointed to in- vestigate humane ways of inflictng the death penalty. They reported in 1888 and suggested the construc- tion of chair in which the criminal could be placed for electrocution Such a chair was devised by F. F. Davis. state electrician. New York in either 1888 or 1882.
 Q. What is the meaning of the name Bernardette?
 A. It means little Bernard". Bernard is from the Teutonic and means bold as a bear.
 Q. When did Dempsey fight Carpenter?
 A. Saturday afternoon. July 2. 1921.
 Q. Was President Lincoln the first head of a nation to set slaves free?
 A. Denmark. by royal order. pro- hibited the slave trade after 1892 in her possessions. France, follow ing the doctrine of her Revolution. abolished her colonial slavery and slave trade in 1793. In England an Act of March 25. 1907 provided for total abolition of slavery.
 c. How far west did the Prince of Wales go on his visit to the United States?
 A. No farther than Washington, D. C.
New Britain herald., 1928-05-03
MISS JuNKERs HoNORs DEAD

Until the picture arrived at the Herald ofice of Miss Herta Junkers, daughter of the designer of the Bremen, Tn the act of decorating the grave of Lieut.. S. H. Wooster. U. S N., in Arlington cemetery. this honoring of the memory of tho New Britain born aviator had gone un- noticed. The act apparently was an unostentatious follow-up of the similar act done by the Bremen fly CTS. It was especially pleasing to Eddy Glover post of the American Legion because the entire idea Of having the Germans and Irish decorate this grave originated in this city.
 To the alcrtness Of Eddy Glover post and the splendid cooperation of Congressman Tenn and the Ger man embassy in Washington has been due this kind remembrance Of the New Britain aviator. All are en- titled to hearty congratulation and commendation. The alaCrity with which the foreign airmen and Miss Junkers laid wreaths upon the graves in Arlington has left 8 deep and gratifying impression.
New Britain herald., 1928-05-03
INTO OUR WASTEBAsKET

Clarence G. Willard, secretary of the Connecticut Committee on Public Service Information. told the Feder- al Trade Commission at Washington that his committee had succeeded in having newspapers in the state pub fish an average of 1S9 column inches of Information sent out by hts office last year.
 None of this news" or "informa- ton" was accepted by the New Brit ain Herald. When it was received + was read with amusement for It's affectation of naivete-and tossed into the wastebasket.
 Tho Herald could not bring itself to think that . group of smart bus iness men would publish regularly bulletin of information" in spirit of philanthropy. There was too much Rorabackism between the lines.
 MT. Willard is secretary of the Republican State Central committee of which Mir. Roraback is dictator. MT. Roraback is deeply interested in the welfare of privately owned cleo tric light and power companies, as we'll as other public utilities. MT. Roraback is MT. Willard's Masters Voice" and if MT. Willard is interest ed in bringing information concern- ing public utilities before the public that pays the bills it is because Mr. Roraback wants him to.
 The Herald hopes that Mir. Willard will not cut 1t off his mailing list. These bulletins which come from his pen help to lift the burden of the day, like Life Judge" and other joke books.
New Britain herald., 1928-05-03

pedltlously, with perhaps little eX- perlmenting at first to determine the most practical kind.
 There are several other bad tri- angle corners in the city, however, which need attention. The junction ot streets in front of the south Con- grcgational church is one of these: IL frequently happens that both pedestrians and autoists arc en- tirely at sea at this point. Another bad place IS Main and Elm streets, where special policeman ire ausntly IS necessary to operate the lights lndependentl from those elsewhere. East Main and Elm streets. and East Main street and Hartford avenue likewise are corners where pedestrians are forced to watch their steps to an unreascns hle extent. Perhaps the police, with 3
 little additional study Of the sltua- ton, could improve all cf these places to the benefit of both pedes- trians and autoists. One of the worst places, from the standpoint oi pe destrians, IS the entrance to Wal nut Hill park, along West Main street, where walkers arc forced 10 traverse the highway for an unusual ly long stretch in order merely 10 cross the entrance to the park, and only the fact that a minority of drivers use the park drive eases the unpleasant experience. Those who do. however. usually bowl up or down the hill at a lively speed. Slow down signs along this drive might be one way to solve the difficulty, especially as during certain portions of the day many children cross this triangular highway.
 The public will be biased to note that the new police commissioners are showing evidence of trying to solve some of the difficulties of loco motion throughout the city. Pedes- trians have an inherent right to cross streets with reasonable safety, and courts of the state have repeatedly held that their rights are paramount. It is the duty Of every city to uphold these rights without transgressing on the reasonable rights of drivers.
New Britain herald., 1928-05-03
THE WAITRESS AT HOME (Observed by Beatrice Stcin)

Her Husband: 'Is dinner ycady, Ilon?"
 Waitress: 'Courscit's 'srcady. Don't be s'fresh! Whatcha gonna havc?"
 Her Husband: Well. let's sec now, I--'
 Waitress: "1lurryup n'giveycror- der. I ain't got all day. Eoastbect astporkfriedlveran onions! Ham, burgerbecfsteahandfried chicken Noodle beefhashandstew."
 Her Husband: Well. Bessie, dear-"
 Waitress: "Whatcha tryin'todo? :? Eidme? Huh? Seehere, bigboy, give yerorder orthere'llbe trouble, sec? observation-disclosures shoes string potatoes! Tcacoffeeormilk? ?'
 Her Husband: What did you say?"
 Waitress: "Tcacoffceormilk, va dumbcll."
 Her Husband: Bessie. dear, why can't we sit down together and have dinner like other people? Don't he so hard with me! l love you, I real iy do. Can't you bc agrccable?"
 Waitress: "Tcehec! You seem 10 be nice fclla-teehee. Really mean that about you know-lovin' me? Huh? Techce! Cross your heart? lotsa fellas tell me that. but you seem to be such nice fclla! How about takin' mo to th'movics after I get off work, huh? Oh,no. dcaric, you mustn't try to hold by hand-not yet. I wouldn't mind hav- in you for a steady fella. Now will you have coffee, ,swectie? or, Tea, honey? Or milk. boyfricnd?'
New Britain herald., 1928-05-03
PLAINVILLE AND ITS WATER

Acquisition of the water supply system being the aim Of a movement which has gotten under way in Plainyille, it perhaps is worth ones effort to take view of the possibili- ties.
 It is apparent that an increase in the water rates caused the move ment to germinate. The water con- pany purchases a supply from the New Britain municipal plant. The price charged by New Britain is said 10 be higher than some of the large users in New Britain pay, al- though the plainvillc price is on the same level as that charged to Maple Hill. Tine surrounding towns may criticize this price arrangement somewhat, but after all, the water board in New Britain thinks that tho local water system primarily is for the advantage Of Now Britain.
 IL is possible for PlainNille to buy out it's water company and at the same time it might be able to re- duce its water rates. That, at least, would work out In theory. There would be no salaries 10 pay for di- rectors or officials. and 3 civic board would manage the water works for glory. There would be no interest upon investment. as is the custom in municipal ownership, and the public would get the water al cost.
 Az against that thcre would be tho uor. sy,ty of issuing bonds fo pay for the plaut, and these would have to he paid off. and until all were paid interest would have 10 be met Pay ments and interest, however, would come out Of the general tax rate, and not necessarily the water rates. After tho bonds have been paid off the town would own it's water plant, and there would be no more interest to nay
 The outlook therefore is not one that need worry rlainyile. The only point that need cause discussion Is inc issuance of Inc bonds. Most towns don't like to issue bonds, but with such issuance goes ownership of the water plant. and in from 15 10 20 years, depending upon the life of the bonds. th" town Wf'' have something to show for the financing.
New Britain herald., 1928-05-03
CHILDREN AND PLANES

What fires the ina ginati ton is well illustrated in the toys that children play with They like trains, automo- piles, trucks, the myriads Of other mechanical toys-and toy airplanes.
 They play with the planes by mak- ing them soar about the room while
 holding them aloft wit h tiny hand:
 they manufacture rough carica,ures of planes out of pieces of wood; they draw them with pencil on paper. If anything. the kid. nowadays are air minded,
 How man, hundreds, if moi thou- sands, of them in New Britain every evening take pleasure in watching for the mail plane passing over the
 city. the hum of it's motors is T
 lullaby just before going 10 bed,
 The rising generation accepts life
 as it happens 10 he when they arrive
 in our midst and grow up in the en- >ironment. They are taking arplanos as 8 matter of course. All but the
 very smallest know what LinJy
 stands tor.
 Their dads and niamas. hailing from q time when such things were unknown. may be slower in accept ing tho vast changes that have come about during their lfctimcs: but the little ones ar" not thus handicapped.
 Airplanes 10 them have always exist cd throughout life. They were never astonished at thc realization that man could fly like the birds: to them they always have been able to do so. To them zoominC through the . air is no more remarkable than any of the Of her things that mon do and 10 most oe the tots running a puffing steam locomotive still seems the most wonderful of accomplishment
New Britain herald., 1928-05-03
Terrible Eczema
 Goes Quickly
Strong, Powerful Yet Safe. Surgeons Prescription Called M0one's Emerald Oil Has
 Astonished Physicians

Here is a surgeon s wonderful pres scription now dispensed by pharma- cisls at trifling cost, that will do more towards helping you get rid of unslghtly spots and skin diseases than anything you're ever used.
 In skin diseases it's action is little less than magical. The itching Of eczema is instantly stopped: the cruptions dry up and scale oft in q very few days. The same is true of harbcrs' itch, salt rheum and other irritating and unsightly skin trou- blts.
 You can obtain Moone's Emerald Oil in the original bottle at any mod ern drug store. It is safe 10 use, and failure in any of the ailments noted above is next to impossible. The Fair Drug Dept. can supply you at any time.
New Britain herald., 1928-05-03
COLLECTING PERSONAL TAXES

Collecting personal, or poll, taxes is a hard and mean job in number less cities because of their extreme unpopularity. In Hartford word went out the other day that more than S. eco persons had failed to pay their personal taxes, and in Bristol the officials started a campaign against dclinqucnts, resulting in court costs and probably much indignation.
 The average individual thinks the personal taxes are too high, especial ly as in almost all cases the head Of the family pays his wifc's tax The tax per couple, therefore, is S4 and the legal assumption that the tax is only sc is a theory in such in- stances
 All citizens pay taxes, regardless of whether they own property. When they don't they pay indirectly, through their rent; just as they pay for the use Of city water, although the bill goes to the landlord.
 Poll taxes originated in the as- sumption that only property owners paid taxes. and if the others were not taxed in some way they would not be contributing to the tax fund. Since that time this economic ab- surdity has been thoroughly eXplod- cd. Poll taxes remain simply because they are simply one moro way to get the money.
 If a politician wants to attain popularity and votes in the shortest possible time let him advocate the discontinuance Of poll taxes. We arc surprised that, in this age when poli- ticians arc supposed to have plumb cd every method of political prefer ment, that this hasn't been done long ago.
New Britain herald., 1928-05-03

You can get an answer to any question of fact or information by writing 10 the Question Editor. New Britain Herald. Washington Bureau. 1922 New York avenue. Washington. D. C.. enclosing two cents in stamps for reply. Medical. legal and marital advice cannot be given, nor can ex. tended research be undertaken. All other questions will receive . per. sonal reply. Unsigned requests can- not be answered. All letters are con- ddential.-Editor.
 Q. What is the world speed record for d motorcycle?
 A. Johnny Seymour on an In- dian motorcycle at Daytona Beach. Florida, January 12, 1926, made a record of 132 miles per hour.
 Q. Who IS the chairman of the Ways and Means Committee of the House of Representatives?
 A. Rep. Willis C. Hawley of Oregon.
 c. Where can one address Dr. Frank Mccoy
 A, 527 West 7th street. Los Angeles, Calf.
 Q. How much did it cost to film The King of Kings?
 A. The King of Kings was filmed by Cecil B. De Mile, at a cost of e2,300,o00. It was filmed in % reels but only II of them were used.
 Q. How many buildings devoted to public schools are there in the |. S."
 A. o5S.s5o.
 c. In what direction do ships passing through the Panama Canal from the Atlantic to the Pacific go?
 A. Southeast.
 .. Why is it impossible to at- tain a perfect vacuum
 A. Because gas expands jndef1- nitcly and fills space in any reccp- tacle and no pump has been devised that will exhaust the last particle of II. AS fast as gas is removed. the remaining particles expand and fill the entire space. Finally a point is reached where a pump of the highest efficiency is unable to re- move the last particles.
 Q. Did the Spanish fleet st the Battle of Santiago have heavy casualties?
 a. Admiral CeVera and about 1,5oo of his men were taken prison- CTS by the Americans. All his ships were either destroyed, ran aground or surrendered. The Americans lost hardly a man.
 Q. Where and when was Buffalo Bill born" Where is he buriedo
 A. He was born on Scott Farm near the town of LeClair. Iowa, February o6. 1S4e. His remains were buried on Lookout Mountain. Denver. Colo.
 Q. What is the meaning Of the word "sniggcr"?
 A. It is the same as snicker and means 10 laugh in a suppressed manner; half suppressed or smothered laugh.
 Q. Can a man who wears spec taclcs join the Army, Navy or Marine Corps"
 A. Not if he has to wear them at the time he is examined for en- listmcnt.
 Q. Who wrote the lines: T am the master Of my fate, am the captain Of my soup?
 A. They are from "1nvcctus' by Henley. The verse reads: Tt mat
New Britain herald., 1928-05-03
WALES CONSIDERING A
 TRIP TO EAST AFRICA
Prince Understood to Re Contcm- plating Long Journey to Hunt
 for Big Game.

London, May , (CP)-The Prince of Wales is considering a trip to East Africa it was officially an- nounced today.
 It was assumed a primary object of the trip would be big game hunt ing.
 The time of Wales departure, it was said, depended on the weather, as African roads frequently were im- passable.
 The announcement partially con- firmed Johannesburg dispatch to the Daily Mail, which said the Prince would tour Egypt. East Afri- ca and northern Rhodesia.
 Wales, the dispatch said. would he accompanied by his brother, ulc Duke of Glouccster-Princc Henry and would arrive at Livingstone, northern Rhodesia. at the end of his tour, in November. He would return to England in January, 1t was added.
New Britain herald., 1928-05-03
ISLES OF SAFETY

The best isle of safety in New Britain is Central park. If the green were not there, and in it's place noth ing but smooth pavement, what a death trap 1t would be for pedes- trians. In such case, Of course, there would have been an artificial Isle Of safety arranged there long ago.
 The proposal 10 provide an isle of safety at Main and East Main street, originating in the new polICe commissioners. needs the stlmula- ton Of commendation II is good Idea and should be put through e4-
New Britain herald., 1928-05-03
THE FLY IN THE OINTMENT!

Whitson: Why is Collins so glum today? He ought to feel happy. ] heard he won the prize at the dance last night for the funniest-lookins costumc.'
 Cheney: He did. but his wife won a prize, too.' Whtson: He shouldn't begrudge her one"
 Cheney: "No, but she won the prize for having the funnicst-look- ing husband."
 Jose Juan Battle Copyright. 1928. Reproduction
 E'orbidden)
New Britain herald., 1928-05-03
INVESTIGATING WATERI.URY

An investigation Of finances is threatened in Waterbury. A mass meeting Of indignant citizens is promised. The auditors report and the controllers financial report for last year has not yet been made public. although State Tax Commis- sloner Elodgott has CODY. tThe tax commissioner says the 1927 re-
New Britain herald., 1928-05-03
THE OLD KITCHEN


 By Bobby H. Giles I miss the dear old kitchen Where mother use to bake Her bread and pies. and shoo the flies
 That hovered OCT the cake. And Oh, l miss the odors Of steamins broths and hrews, The pungent rceks of Spring time locks.
 The breath of Irish stevs. We've now a modern kitchen, Too odorless, I'll say. And we've a cook who will not brook
 A small boy in her way. But sometimes Pa does cooking And l can venture in; It isn't food, but it smells good ... When Pa is making gin.
New Britain herald., 1928-05-03

1885, to ''help young soldiers who had become addicted to the drink- ing habit" the organ of the Union points out in its issue just out. Edward T. Buckingham. chairman of the Democratic state convention is a descendant of the governor.
New Britain herald., 1928-05-03
FOR THE WORKING GIRL

The newspapers are filled with little suggestions for increasing the happiness and efficiency of homes. Why doesn't someone write a few office helps" for girls instead of home helps?"
 Just by way of getting the idea across here are a few office helps which might help:
 A pound on your typewriter is worth two on your frame.
 Laugh at the old mans jokes or the laugh will be on you.
 It's the office boy who steals the stamps out of your desk.
 Hide your engagement ring until The day before you marry
 Powder your nose but keep if out of his private affairs.
 John Loyejoy
New Britain herald., 1928-05-03
COMMUNICATED
MIR. MERIAN'S RESIDENCE

Newly Appointed City Engineer Lives in Wallingford. Editor New Britain Herald: An argument having arisen, l would be obliged to you if you would settle it. Does the Mir. Merriam engineer live in New Britain?
 Thank you.
 DISPUTANT Engineer Philip A. Mcrian is a resident Of Walling
New Britain herald., 1928-05-03

Why isn't sign painting sport: It's work done by professionals, and people like to watch it as they do baseball.
New Britain herald., 1928-05-03

Al has one consolation. Most Of those who think the Democratic party would cut its throat by nom mating him arc Republicans.
New Britain herald., 1928-05-03
According to HOyle!

First Diner: That waitress is ccr- tainly queen" Second Diner: Think so7" First Diner: T know so I just saw her take the tray."
 Ralph Brennan
New Britain herald., 1928-05-03

Amcricanism: X constant struggle to attain the degree of perfection demanded by Heaven and the maga- zine ads.
New Britain herald., 1928-05-03

Government is like digestion. When you are least aware of it, it is functioning most efficiently.
New Britain herald., 1928-05-03

It's easy to get along without re- ligion. The hard part Is to find something else 10 keep mankind de- cent.
New Britain herald., 1928-05-03

Companionate marriage: Legal ized immortality; making dishonor honorable by giving it nice name.
New Britain herald., 1928-05-03

1sahos Audit BuIeaa of Circulation The A 3. C s . national organization vAteh furnishes nswspapers and adver- tlsoro with . strictly honest analysis o' circulation Our circulation statistics are hAsod upop this audit. This insures pro- teetieu against freud in newspaper de tribution Agurss to both national and tecaj edvertisera
New Britain herald., 1928-05-03

June is almost here. Tho jewellers window displays an unusual assort- ment of gravy ladies.
New Britain herald., 1928-05-03

Blue bird house: A quaint little box covered with bark and filled with English sparrows.
New Britain herald., 1928-05-03

There's no way to be nonchalant on your first plane ride. You can't walk down the aisle for q drink of ice water.
New Britain herald., 1928-05-03

Correct this sentence: "1f I men, ton an ache" said he, my wife be- gins to describe hers, but l never feel offendcd.'
 Copyright. 1928, Publishers
 Syndicate
New Britain herald., 1928-05-03
TEMPERANCE SOCIETY

Rockville. May 3 R-The Con- necticut Temperance Union was founded by Governor William A. Buckingham, Civil war governor, in
New Britain herald., 1928-05-03

If you hate your nciGhhor be- cause his chickens scratch in your garden. you should understand the Balkans.
New Britain herald., 1928-05-03

If man should bite a dog, that would he news" said Dana. But there were no hot dogs in his time.
New Britain herald., 1928-05-03

Artificial bait is efficient. It's the only kind that will land fish through a plate glass window.