Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1928-07-23
THIS AND THAT
BY CHARLES E. TRACEWELL.

Our friend Doodenfiocker (who IL
burdened with our own front name. to-
| w.t. Charley has a terrible time pleas
| ing his friends with his hats.
One might think offhand thai
Charlie Doodenflocker's hats were
strictly his own business, but 1t does
not seem So
Charlie told us about It the other
day, and we feel sorry for him. He
belongs to the galaxy of personages
who cannot wear anything to suit
their friends.
If they put on tweed suit. some one
| is sure to pop up with, "Oh, you
shouldn't wear tweeds. They make
you look too fat"
If Doodenflocker by chance gets into
| come out with, Say, Charlie, fol
heavens sake, where did you get that
suit?"
The innocent bystander might think
him an infant in arms, seeing the
! manifest and terrible interest taken In
his clothing by others.
1t has always been that way, he told
us.
When he first put on long pants mot
trouSerS) his family could not agree
on them at all. Those we're the days
Of the extreme peg top" trousers
which gave the masculine frame some
thing of the appearance of carrot on
parade
With an eye to the mode, young
Charlie Doodenfiocker. as he was then,
expressed wish for ultra peg-tops. His
father would by no means hear of 1t.
His sister urged them, his older brother
opposed them.
Aunts and uncles joined in the fray.
The first long pants that Charlie wore
came near causing family ruption,
until one day young Doodenflocker set
tied the matter by coming out in a
compromise.
Since Charlie Doodenflocker's first
trousers suited no one but Charlie
Doodenfiocker himself every one else
was happy In quarreling at him, and
thus he told us, it has ever been since.
Charlie never seemed to be able to
get his hair right to please others. Be-
tween his clothes and his hair Charlie
has had hell of time of it, he said.
(This language is strictly his own; we
disclaim such language
If Charlie let his hair grow long, he
was asked If he was trying to look like
a foot ball player (such athletes wore
long hair in those days, as we suppose
every one knows. but some one may
find 1t news.
If he had it cropped close, kind
friends suggested that he looked like a
convict or something. Charlie just
couldn't please them. Other acquaint-
ances of absolutely scoundrelish appear
ance got by with never criticism, but
Charlie Doodenfiocker drew it all.
Once he went off to Atlantic City
all by himself and during the whole two
weeks he was there not a soul seemed
to notice his jaunty round white hat OF
duck.
Before he started on that journey his
family had assured him that he would
be run off the boardwalk" When
they saw him coming in that hat, he
had been told, they would call out the
fire engines.
Doodenfiocker could see nothing
wrong with the hat, so he wore 1t any
way and found the throngs of Atlantic
City strangely Of his own opinion. No
one said. "Whoopee, look what's here!
or asked him where he got it. Getting
bolder. as the days went by, he wore
it everywhere, on the Steel Pier, the
beach, boardwalk, In the auction rooms
and at the inlet. He even walked by a
cage of monkeys with impunity.
He had forgotten about his hat when
he got back home. but the first thing
he heard when he opened the door was
a well intentioned voice informing, Well,
I see you still have that hat" Eyes.
replied Charlie Doodenfiocker. they
liked that hat down at Atlantic City"
But this is Washington" retorted the
voice, crushingly.