The Washington times., 1928-04-02
BUNS COMP LAIN
. D. C. P|CK|NGS
ARE POOR
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fContinued from First PageJ
live In swell hotels, and he thought
Howe would help along two such
distinguished gentlemen of the road
as he and Big Nose.
Coming north they ran into
Cantain Stcrno and Captain Sterno,
Ara. who were also headed for what
thew. too, believed were the Elysian
fields. The two Sternos, according
to Big Nose. spent the dimes they
bumrned on the way on canned heat
to drink. Red and Big Nose don't
drink, so they spent their nickles
and dimes on food and flops.
Don't Tie Up With Danes
But the imaginations Of this
quartet were due for q fall Not
even the petite little Sylvia Diner.
the hoboette from New York, damped
the outcries Of Red today. OF course
real he-hobos and buns don't 80 in
for chic little girls Of the road, Red
explained, but he did give your
correspondent his ideas on Washing
ton, and even the prospect Of march
ing with James Eads Howe to pay
4 little duty ana social call on Presi-
dent Coolidge this afternoon, hasn't
changed his opinion Of our fair
capital city.
Said New York Red:
'sYeIl! This Is some convention.
Why look at me clothes. Look at
this. here now. sweater. And look
&c us buns last night. Why. we
didn't have no PLACE to flop and II
was raining.
aOh. sure, We could have been
mission ettffs' and gone up to the
Gospel Mission, and got saved. Then
they would have Topped Us. But
only buzzards do that.
BIames Dry Law
'.All toe local buns are cashinE.
In on this here, now. convention.
why its hell to try and make flop
money here. Prohibition has ruined
the cumming business. When you
hit q guy for flop money he thinks
you are drinking. All de local bunts
is drunks. They spoil the racket
here"
The Big Nose Kid. who had been
standing alongside whistling, Tale
luiah I'm q Bum" injected himself
into the interview with his partner
At this point. Said Big Nose, "Yeh,
Reds right. Look at Captain Sterno
in there. And here comes Captain
Sterno. 3rd. There's two drunken
buns for you.
Captain sterno, Ord, is the worst
bum / ever did see. Why he hits q
guy up on the street and he sees
another passing. What does that
big bum do, ask yuh? Why he
wells, 'Hy, mister, want to see
you q minute and after he gets
done with the foist' guy he hits up
the second for dough. And them
guys don't eat, less its mission
handouts. They spend their touches
on canned heat. 7 can't even stand
the smell of it,
TO Hit For New York
Red continued his interview.
These knights Of the Rods, are far
frokl being shy with the press.
"a lot of huns has beat 1t already
after giving this layout the up and
down." said he. "S0on as j get
SOME ElOIHCS HI OAA 80 1NOW AOAA
That's me home. I'm not on the
bum there, but / only pass through,
though. But we buns get q de-
cent break there. But got to
ret me some clothes here, and ]
won't get meseIf saved In no Cos.
rel mission TO do that" he added as
an after thought.
Howe arrived at this point. There
were about 20 hobos, self confessed,
out OF the 80 accredited delegates.
The millionaire bum looked almost
as bad az the worst dressed dele
gates to his convention. His shirt
appeared to be the result Of a 10
months lockout of the laundries,
and the coat and pants were not so
good either. A close observer
could, undoubtedly, have told one
what the millionaire has been eat
ing for the past several months.
His glasses had been nended with
a toothpick and some thread. But
clothes. some wise person once re-
marked, never did make the man.
Miss Diner Lends Class
The arrival of little Miss Diner,
of Local $50 of the Buns Brother
hood Of New York, lent the class
to the proceedings. She comes
here to urge old age pensions and
the dole system for the unemployed
She also wants the buns ccnven-
ton to pass resolutions along to
Congress for a dole for all those
over~40. who can't get work.