Evening star., 1928-10-21
Capital Sidelights

xu Tie interests Oh HepuDl1Can party
success in the coming election, HouSs.
Leader TilSon, In charge of the Hoover
speakers bureau in the East, has found
it advantageous to correct one of Amer
ica's greatest philosophers
Mark Twain. According to Mr. Tilson's
version, Mark Twain, in "A Connecticut
Yankee at King Arthur's Court" hu-
morously discussed the tariff from the
-protectionist standpoint, but never
theless with logic and sound argument.
II the hypothesis upon which he based
the logic had been equally correct. The
transmitted Connecticut Yankee, who
had become "the boss" at King Arthur's
court. is represented as discussing pro-
lection with peasant of a neighboring
protectionist country:
why, look here, Brother Dowley.
don't you see? Your wages are merely
higher than ours in name, not in fact"
says the Yankee, speaking, of course
of the wages in King Arthur's realm
and those in the peasants own country
Hear him! They are the double-ye
have confessed 1t yourself"
Eyes. yes, / don't deny that at all"
says the Yankee. But that's got moth
ing to do with it, the amount of the
wages in mere coins, with meaningless
names attached to them to know them
by, has got nothing to do with it. The
thing is, how much can you buy with
your wages? That's the idea. =
What I say Is this: With us half a
dollar buys more than a dollar buys
with you-and therefore it stands to
reason and the commonest kind of COM
mon sense that our wages are higher
than yours"
Here is sound argument against
protection" says Mr.. Tilson, "if the
facts were correctly stated, but the great
humorist unfortunately made up his
facts to fit his argument instead of
changing his theory to fit the facts
Mark Twain wrote this in the eighties
and undoubtedly was aiming at the
tariff controversy then raging in the
United States. There are no figures
showing the relative buying power of
wages in this country and abroad at
that time, and as there was then no
League of Nations, Labor Office or Bu-
reau of Labor Statistics to gather such
data it must be presumed that the
humorist had none at his command.
Consequently he based his logic on an
entirely false premiSe-that protection,
In this country at least, had raised liv-
ing costs more than it had raised
wages, while the facts are that wages
have increased under protection much
faster than the cost of living"
X
One of the most brilliant minds in
the present Congress is Representative
Finis j. Garrett of Tennessee, who will
be missing from the Seventy-first Con-
gress because he was an unsuccessful
aspirant for the Senate. However, he
has left behind him several gems of
oratory that will be quoted in school
text books for many years to come.
Here is sample, from one of his
speeches on Our Government:
II do not wish to think of the re-
public as a painting upon canvas, the
color of which will fade in the sunlight
or the fiber of which will rot in the
rain. 1 wish rather to think of it as
a great mosaic composed of and 40
imperishable gems, each lustrous with
its own local beauty and color, so &C.
mented together with love and law and
human reason as to be itself indestruct-
ible, however violently human passions
may beat against it."
In response to a request there is
here printed Gen. Pershings tribute to
the Army mule:
You can pack him. drive him, or ride
him; you can starve him, beat him, and
neglect him-you can do all sorts of
things to him that you cannot do to an
automobile, and he will be there just as
long as he has four legs to walk on.
1T was a pitful sight during the wal
to see horses and mules, splendid and
faithful to the last, drop by the road
side, exhausted from lack OF food or
shot to pieces by artillery"