Plentywood herald. [volume] (Plentywood, Mont.) 1908-current, 1928-02-17

THIS a. m, I arose
AT my radio telepathic psychological in
Urinary
SUFFERING keenly from after effects OF
q hard
KNoB-TURNING night. I had been to
a radio party.
THERE ought to be a law passed for the
suppression of radio activities.
CONSERVATIONISTS can tell you that
there is as much effort wasted in try
ing to make the radio work, as would
PAY the national debt, free Ireland, paei-
fy Nicaragua. suppress Senator Blan-
ton and enforce prohibition.
SO far this year I have wasted s2s6.S4
worth of time. acquired profanity, lost
my angelic disposition and several OF
my friends over radio.
/ BELONG to the "Squeal" club, the
Anti-static association, the Board OF
Interference Control and the Antenna
Extension society.
BUT it don't get me anywhere.
L WANT everything 1 can't get and get
everything l don't want.
I PROPOSE to de-bunk The radio myth.
The radio will have to go out and get
a reputation before it can meet me
again after last night.
IF a fellow wants to kid himself, let him
AXE up spiritualism and max a good
job Of it. With a good four bit me-
dunn
I'VE talked to julius Caesar. Lucretia
Borgia. Thomas Francis Meagher and
the Car Of Russia with lots less
trouble than
GETTING BLA of Calgary to let me in
on a Masonic banquet speech.
DIR. Thorkelson and Judge Billie Carroll
of Butte may be getting wonderful
results" but all l think is that their
imagination is improving.
NE and Radio Roscoe are not IN speak
ing terms. Radio wins the Pulitzer
prize for the worlds best fiction OF
1927.
I WILL trade my radio set. sight I'M
SEEM Tor a good second hand set OF
false teeth, an old mode Ford, a high
wheel bicycle, or q key-winding watch
TO the first conner. Those things may
be Anticipated but they worked.
LAST nights radio party over Jimmy
LASTS 81 900 radio set al out like
the memory Of the last tooth / had
pulled or the time l came out Of an
anesthetic.
MAYBE I will have to join the Wonder
full Results club" which meets every
day after the night before
AND lies about the wonderful results it
obtained.
THIS is a faith cure club. Members get
SO they believe themselves. In radio
circles there is no such word as fail.
IF television works as we'll as radio, I
predict that under its magnetic trans
mission Russell Strain of Great Falls
will look like Marshal Field of Chicago.
LAST night we were served with must
cal melange and oratorical chop-suey.
+ HOPE that fellow who whistled for his
dog every two minutes has ~laryngitis
today.
JIMMIE turned the knobs like a cracks
man trying to get into a safe. Alias
Jimmie Valentine. however, usually got
something.
Il GET wonderful results" said one skep-
tic. II put my set on the open win
dow sill last night and l got Chill"
THE first number is always q Jews-harp
solo. This is the only chance a Jew
ever gets to play a harp.
THAT'S pretty" said a lady guest.
PRETTY rotten" said the town crouch,
who wasn't raised right.
81 wasn't getting anything" said Jim,
Il was just tuning in"
SOUNDS better when you don't get any,
thing" said another. Radio fans are
never polite.
MEANWHILE Jim switched over to an
other station.
SOMEONE In Oklahoma started to whis-
tie for his dog and the dog wouldn't
come.
THAT'S static" said Jim. isn't it
lovely" said an agreeable old lady.
BUT 1t developed into a siren and we