davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Brownsville herald. [volume] (Brownsville, Tex.) 1910-current, 1928-12-22
A BIT OF SENATORIAL HUMoR
sumont E%nterprise),

Senator Bruce of Maryland, a wet democrat whose
amendment to the tressury-postofficee supply bill in
creasing the prohibition enforcement appropriation
from Sls,5OOOOO to S27O.6e7,8S4 was passed by the SEN
ate, has qualified as one Of the senatc's foremost hu-
morists.
Considering the sort Or humor that usually charac-
terizes seenate debate, and the kind Of joke Senator
Bruce perpstrated. the distinction he has gained is
hardly worth having. Senatorial dignity, or what is
supposed to be senatorial dignity, sank to a low cbb
when Senator Bruce's amendment was admitted and
adopted.
Senator Bruce. the dispatches tell US, "lsughed
aloud when his amendment was DECLARED to be sp.
proved and the bill passed. Chairman Warren OF the
ssnatee appropriations committee, after reading over
the Bruce amendment. also laughed. The presiding o.
ficsE who hastily declared the smendment adopted was
that srrh Jester, Senator Moses Of New Hampshire.
member Of the celebrated Smelling committee which
visited the White House to learn if Woodrow Wilson
were still IN complete possession Of his mental facul-
ties when that stricken leader lay on his bed partially
paralyzed. The witticisms Of Senator Moses did much
to enliven the Hoover presidential campaign, which was
at times quite dull and eolorless.
Eminent members Of the senate 'augked over the
Bruce amendment because they considered it a smart
trick. They knew that an appropriation of more than
q quarter q a billion dollars for prohibition enforce
msnt in one year would never become . law. but an
amendment proposing such an appropriation might en-
bsrrsss the Prohibitionists Of the country and emphs-
size what tho vets assert 70 be the impossibility OF
enforcing prohibition.
The vets reason that by making the cost Of prohibit
bitten enforcement prohlbitive snd by setting up vex-
atious and complicated enforcement machinery with
prohibition that repeal OF modification Of the eigh-
teenth amendment will be easy. Senator Bruce. BY his
rreposterous amendment, merely indicated what he
would like 10 do-not, by any means, what he expects
to do. But lie got q laugh out OF Il, and 50 did other
members Of the senate whose sense Of humor is attunsd
to his own.
The Bruce amendment will be thrown out, of course,
by %eonferees Of the senate and house, but it may be al
ways considered by Senator Bruce rs one Of the high
lights Of . none too distinguished career in the senate.
Brownsville herald. [volume] (Brownsville, Tex.) 1910-current, 1928-12-22
Benefits Of Organization

QssFer Rio Grande Valley last week had q fair
n what effective organization can accomplish
Ing and protecting Valley interests.
x1plder canyon dam bill was before the ssn-
aensts COMMITTEES had stricken from the bill
Paat proposed by the Lower Rio Grsnds VAL
rs and incorporated in the bill by the lower
10 part Of the United States other than the
snde country was directly interested in that
Faent and consequently the senate gave little or
to the fact that the amendment had been elm
by tie committee.
Robertson, secretary Of the associated irri-
districts of Cameron aud Hidalgo county, re.
copy Of the senate measure and noted that the
Rtndment was not included. That amendment
1s cesssry to the protection Of Valley irrigation
rfcts in connection with any treaty that may be
siated with Mexico. The legal committee Of tbs
rsy districts was called together, the situation out
and . few hours later every irrigation district ia
Valley. the commissioners courts and scores Of in
tted property owners were wiring to Washington
bg the Texas senator's and congressman to ms st
IA inclusion Of the Valley amendment.
kTflsgrams were received within As hours from SEN
4eppard announcing the Valley amendment had
t4 WEl1deu IN the senate MEASURE. Inc aCtl-l OF Ihr
)xAz senators upon receipt Of the kilograms I ; m the
tlley was prompt. They Knew that the associa 4 dis
represented the sentiment Of all irrig ION in
rests in the Lower Rio Grande Valley; thai the Val.
u wanted the amendment included. and that the dis
we're speaking for every resident Of the Valley.
The association Of irrigation districts is merely q
ose organization in which practically all irrigation
tcrests participate. All matters affecting the irriga-
on Interests Of the Valley are discussed and 4 united
Of action adopted. As a result of this united
fort the organization has proved Of incalculable value
1t only in protecting the irrigation interests upon
'omcting improvements, reducing operation costs and
herwise directly henefittiHg the water users. The
includes men who have made a life study
the valiey's irrigation problems; who are intimately
sguainted with every physical phase and factor re-
ting to Valley orrigation; and cooperating with them
e several leading attorneys who are equally familiar
III the legal phases. The organization has a definite
,orrarn--to protect and improve Valley irrigation
stems-and this is its sole objective.
The success which has attended the efforts Of this
ganization is q criterion Of what could be accom-
ished in other lines If the varied interests u the
alley were organized, each to c~o-operats with others IN
definite program for Valley progress. What the
anagers and attorneys Of the irrigation districts have
hievsd is a sample Of what shippers, grovtrs, de-
lopers and others could accomplish for the Valley as
whole if they were organized and in position to pre-
mt a united front in protecting their own a. well rs
. Valleys interests.
Brownsville herald. [volume] (Brownsville, Tex.) 1910-current, 1928-12-22
The Motor Vehicle License

Contending that the people q Texas ere demanding
q reduction in automobils license fees, Representative
Ray Holder OF Lancaster, asserts he will introduce .
bill which will cut the present fee in two.
So far as can be sseertained there is no widespread
demand for reduction Of auto license fees. 1t is true
thega has been some controversy relative 20 distrihu'
item Of funds from that source, and many motor We
hicle owners are Of the opinion that . larger part Of
the Zee should be devoted TO highway construction ~
maintenance, but the Texas license fee compares very
f~avorshly with that collected in ether ststss'
It IL appsrsat that funds for highway construction
and maintenance must come from some toures, lhs
proposal to issue ss5O,ooo,ooo state bonds to finsnes
the state highway program indicates that practically
all the gasoline tax will be used to retire the bonds
Texas meteor vehicle owners are interested In feeder
roads rs well as state highways. The major part OF
county bond issues are now being expended on fssder
road construction. A division Of motor license fees
which would provide the counties additional funds VITA
rhj<h to finance feeder read programs wonld Fsnevs
ssrh skie<tIon - nay exi1t - the rressnt licsnse fee
kwnz.r CONSTRUCTION should bs
Brownsville herald. [volume] (Brownsville, Tex.) 1910-current, 1928-12-22
A WORD ABOUT THE FLU.
document Enterprisel.

Nbeaumont EnterptlSef.
The federal health service declines 20 show official
alarm, but II is not denied that "flu' is causing much
sickness ir the United States. The number Of reported
cases does not By any means include all the flu eases.
Probably Ehere are four times rs many cases A. are
reported.
The disease is not virulent, but this is no reason
why people should expose themselves to it unnecessar-
lily or neglect TO take treatment when it is contracted.
4 bad cold" may quickly lead TO pneumonia. and prsu-
monis, as everyone knows, is a deadly disease. Once =
person falls a victim to pneumonia, his recovery de-
ponds largely on his own powers Of resistance, his gen.
eral physical condition.
Influenza, however. yields readily to treatment and
in its present form it need not cause serious compiled.
tions, but one should be careful. Go to bed at once
and send for a DOCTOR" is the advice usually given to
"flu" victims. II is good advice. Persons who act
upon IL will soon recover. Those whn don't may die
not Of FLU" but Of pneumonia.
We are told BY the health experts TO avoid crowds.
overheated rooms and bad air; TO ct as much fresh air
as possible, sleep eight or nine hours every night, and
eat sensibly, take some physical exercise every day,
avoid etremes of heat and cold, and keep our bodies, es-
pecislly our feet, dry in wet weather. Persons in good
physical condition are less likely to contract influenza.
II they should fall sick they will make a quick re-.
covery.
Brownsville herald. [volume] (Brownsville, Tex.) 1910-current, 1928-12-22
@ 1928 CENTRAL PRESS ASSN nc

two tablespoons Of water. II saves
three whites
The best cooks are the most eco
nomical,' Byrd said in Mandy's ear,
n she carried their plates ~ the kit
chen.
Mrs. Hamilton and Mandy canned
and preserved and picked in the
mornings. and in the afternoons, she
plunked poor Mandy out on the back
steps TO sew rags for rugs. Mrs.
Hamilton had thought TO bring a lot
ot wcrr-out ginghams with her for
this purpose.
They're wonderful for the bare
spots Mrs. Hamilton yaid. force
fully, 10 Mandy, like a sergeant di-
recting a raw recruit.
~Yas'm," replied Mandy. hambly.
One day Byrd and Mrs. Hamilton
vent into town for lunch, and while
Mrs. Hamilton shopred. Byrd stop
ned IN 10 see Progress Folk.
she wanted his advice.
She told him about Larry's buying
the Hilllndale and Sunset Point
stocks. and her own futile efforts To
make Jack take them back.
Every morning wake up with
the feeling that before the end Of
the day they may not be worth the
paper they're written on said Byrd.
with lines OF worry etched deeply
into her fine, white forehead.
Progress was worried, too.
There are certsiHly ugly reports
att over town about H." he ccrrnh0r-
ated her worst fears. my opinion in
that Jack Duncan's liable 10 arrest
any moment"
"What can We do about it," asked
Byrd. ~distractedly.
"Ill threaten him a LITTLE and sec
4 ] can get him 10 take them back
ssid Progress.
ooh, I'll be SO grateful" said BYRD,
with a little catch in her Voice.
Byrd was debating whether she
dared 70 express her fears regarding
he Builders Supply stock. but she
decided IL was not loyal 10 20 abuot
discussing ones husbands integrity.
Mr.. Polk knows Us too we'll not
70 warn me IL Lsrry's doing some
thing urethical,' thought Byrd. II
know it's all right. Chef bought
some.
When Pat came Down To dinner
hat night. she was dressed 10 70 out.
| How in the world can you study
hard all day and rallivant around all
nirht?" Mrs. Hamilton demanded.
MONS, you always forget that you
used to tsar around when you were
a GIRL" chaffed Pat. "Now fess ny
didn't your"
"Neveri7 Mrs. Hsmiltrn's rhoie
manner denied the sinister charge OF
~irivolity. when I vss n girl"
You were dead from the neck Up,
Brownsville herald. [volume] (Brownsville, Tex.) 1910-current, 1928-12-22

and probably from the" began Pat,
with . touch Of venom
"Pat!" reprimanded Byrd, sharply.
@Let her gol" said Mrs. Hamilton
10 Byrd. "Scme day I'll probably DO
saying, II told you SOL 10 the young
LADY," and Mrs. Hsmilton's eyes shot
sparks st her youngest daughter.
"A half hour later after Pat had
driven away with Eddie In his brand
new "%hurry-up wagon" as Pat called
his shining new Ford. Chef arrived.
Pat gone out with that awful
Eddie ?" he exclaimed. in surprise.
why. the little baggage had q date
with me-"
"What she sces in that Eddie 7
don't know" said Byrd, rs Chef pre-
pared TO spend the evening with her.
-but she and India have heen having
a death struggle v G him. and now
that he belongs TO Pat again. they're
once more on speaking terms"
tive got to discipline that kid"
said Chef, ~gravely.
II wish you'd try IT, Byrd laughed.
Then her face sobered. "Chet, I
never could understand how you hap
pened 20 buy Builders Supply stock
when you disapproved or IL 50 thor
oughiy."
Chef looked embarrassed and gave
a funny, weak laugh.
well, IL you'll forgive my caadcr.
Byrd he began. Il fell for Larry's
stock like a good many other suckers
are falling for II. You know he is
a darn clever salesman, and I got
roped i'm. that's all"
I'D never dream that stai1 bank
ers would fall for stocks that their
intelligence warned them against
said Byrd. slyly.
II haven't been a banker very long
Maybe that's Why" grinned Chef.
Here ne mother" Byrd lower
ed her voice. "She thinks you'd
make an ideal son-in-law. She says
your sober. industrious and solid.'
Chef let out a whoop at this, but
stiflcd 1t AS Mrs. Hamilton came into
Brownsville herald. [volume] (Brownsville, Tex.) 1910-current, 1928-12-22

house and got your moneys worth"
she continued.
She walked about the yard IN her
hat ar last years vintagc-to be
kind 10 the hatl-a high-turretcd
affair that gave her an emhattled
look, like n tall warrior leading
against the eremy.
When they were sitting in the liv-
Ing rooni. her mother began TO
question Byrd about Pat.
Byrd had reluctantly a-rc-a with
Pat TO let her moth \ believe that
she wss going 10 bushes. college.
You got TO stick NJ thc story yUl
told dad insisted Pat. -Nou know
whatll happen to re III mons knows
I'm working in a dtpur siunt store
she'll ysnk me home 40 fast
won't know what's happening ia me-
I'm certainly glad that that crazy
Patricia has settled down q some
thing serious for once in har iitc.
her mother was saying, rrimiy.
Mrs. Hamilton TgEardCd laHdg
with hostile eyes.
She had come %purroselr tu teach
Byrd how to cool and manage D
house, and she hadn't Nanted any
interference.
But Msndy's ancestors hadn ,
played up 10 the white race during
years of slavery fer nothing.
In twenty-four hours. Mandy had
Mrs. Hamilton wrapped GROUND her
little black finger.
MANDY pretends ~ n~rcs witt
her" Byrd riggled ~ Pat, "atd IL
completely lost in aMazed admira,
ton owe everything She tells her
All day long, Mrs. Hamilton e.
infinite INSTRUCTION. on kitchen tech.
nique and economy Intended fog
Byrd's ears as well as NenSv's.
II always use half butter snd hell
lard when I'm bakiHE cakes" sh4
said 70 Mandy. They're really rich.
err
"Yas'ri,' agreed Eanf "fhatf
les what ! always does. too.
"Oh. what q whale TIM oHs was''
whispered Pat 70 Byrd, o. they wer-
eating their breakfast. M.g Hem.
ilton had had hers N siv o~'clocl.
~ you pour off the coffee th7ts
left over. YOU can rs Il with the
next batch"
Now amt that an ideal Mlndy
"Put all the left-ove- pieces o. soAp
into a jar and IL makes good sham
ZOO. or IL its yelloF soap. for The
kitchen-it's extravagRnt to use white
for dishwashing-kesa it for scrub
| bling rugs"
Handy would regard her with won-
der.
slwsys put : ritt& piece of veal
N my chicken salad md no one :
the wiser"
! When you make a. aIrgsl food, add
Brownsville herald. [volume] (Brownsville, Tex.) 1910-current, 1928-12-22
XIII

Byrd and her mother were driv-
ing 10 the house from the station.
ooh, MONS" said Byrd, eagerly
snd-snd Mandy"
who il Mandy ?" asked her moth
er. in an ominouS tone.
Byrd steeled herself against the
criticism she knew was about 70 de-
scend upon her head. She and her
father had never been able TO please
her mother. while tho helter-skelter
Pat and the drab Becky, her older
sister, who made no effort NJ all 70
do all the things that their mother
demanded az them, were able 20
la her better.
Byrd told her.
Lands sakes,' Mrs. Hamilton
cried. what in creations name do
you need hired help for2 AREN'T
you strong enough 10 keep house for
two peopls7'
Her thin lips clicked hut with =
decision already Termed behind
them, 10 strsighten out this extrava-
CANT daughter.
II can't understand you flibbsEty-
gibbet girls Of today. All you think
Of Ia spending money. You never
think OF helping your husband Get
somewhere, but drive him like q
slave until he drops in his tracks
or you get into the divorce courts
Byrd brushed her ] I'd over her
mouth 10 conceal the smile that mo-
mentsrily tvinkled IN the corners OF
her mouth.
Her mother had nagged her father
all her life. He had never objected
TO anything she did. he urged her
to travel and buy clothes and things
for the house. All he wanted was
10 be left alone. II was because he
was the kindest man in the world
with n backbone as hard and
straight as m oak. that she hadn't
broken him.
As Byrd took her mother through
tho house. she commented acidly on
the foolishness OF sun psrlors and
breakfast s~lcoveE and the ridiculous
sire Of closets that were built into
the new houses The only things
abe really liked about the house
were the two lovely old Gins, one
in the front yard and the other In
the back.
"The fool builder probably cut
down half u 1cEer more she said,
E~rudgingly. 1T doesn't look TO me
as il this house is going to last
your life time
She was examining the eour5a-
ticn with dissrprovel n her eye.
IF you'd cut down on the lux
uries, maids and washing machines
aud All your other c~ontraptions. you
might have put more money into thu
Brownsville herald. [volume] (Brownsville, Tex.) 1910-current, 1928-12-22

the living room. Chef
chair for her.
Chef visited with MRS.
all evening. Byrd listeneI
casionally yawned, but C|
on. He looked at her "
with "a Wy side-long gIand
That's IN very Eersil
man. said Mrs. Hamilton
had left. "And 7 cant sef
sees In that other youne|
TO BIZ C0NT1NUI
Brownsville herald. [volume] (Brownsville, Tex.) 1910-current, 1928-12-22
SHIPPING FISH BY AIRPLANE
dallas ~Times.Heraldl.

Cooks in coast cities have long held a decided sd
vantage over those in inland cities in providing sea
food for diners. transportation facilities have been
too slow for ~sdequste distribution Of fresh salt water
products,
The advent Of the ~sirplane is removing this sdvan.
tsgs. An article published in the New York Times the
other day showed that planes are being used from Alas
ks 10 the southern coast OF the United States In the
transportation Of oysters, crabs, Holsters, elGns AMI
ish Of all kinds.
Refrigeration has been Of vast assistance to ses
food shippers but the ~swiftness Of the Girpiane is OBJ
viously desirable. The planes are said to be proving OF
particular advantage in transporting the products from
the coast 10 shipping points. In Alasks they are "a
placing the slow dog teams. With this improved
transportation other days than FridsT mar become tirh
days.
Brownsville herald. [volume] (Brownsville, Tex.) 1910-current, 1928-12-22

this applies to feeder roads as well . trunk highways.
1t 10 true that real estate receives direct benefits in
the way Of enhanced valuation. but it is already carry
ing all the burden that should be placed upon IL with
out the addition Of financing paved roads.
New Britain herald., 1928-06-12

Prosecuting Attorney Joseph G. Woods has been selected by the com mlttee in charge of the ElkS Fla g Day exercises Thursday night to re- cite the history Of the flag. Prose cutor Woods is 9 past exalted ruler of New Britain lodge and has ire quently appeared as q speaker at lodge affairs, His ability as an ora tor has won his renoWn throughout the state. The history of the flag IS one of the important items on the Elks Flag Day program which is held on June II wherever an Elhs lodge exists.
 Philip Troup of New Haven. con- sldered one of Connectlcuts leading orators, will be the principal speak CT at the event A special musical program has been arranged by Or ganist William H. Bishop,
 Members of patriotic and ex-serv- icemen's organizations have been in- Nited to attend. Exalted Ruler $. c. Casale will open the exercises.
New Britain herald., 1928-06-12
Eczema of
 the Scalp
With a Tendency to Scaliness
 and Dandruff
Results in z Days

This wonderful surgeons prescription. now known all over America as Moone's Emerald oil, Is efficient in the treat ment Of skin diseases that the itching of eczema often stops with one appi- cation.
 A few applications and the most per sistent eases of Eczema often are healed never to return
 Moones Emerald Ol is safe and pleas ant to use and it is so powerfully anti septic and deodorant that even odors arising from ulcers. gangleno and can are instantly killed,
 Moone's Emerald Oil in the original bottle is dispensed by pharmacists. The Fair Drug Dept. always has Moonc' $ Emerald oil on hand.
New Britain herald., 1928-06-12
FLASHES OF LIFE: AL SMITH INSTAILS
 NEW RADIO SET TO HEAR CONVENTION

1y the Associated Press.
 Albany. N. Y,-The states most prominent radio fan has installed a new set /, in order to be sure of catching everything picked up by mtkes Tt Kansas City and Houston. His name is Smith.
 Superior, Visit would be easy for Mir. Coolirge to address the dele gates assembled at Kansas City from alongside the Brule river or the Potomac. Telephone lines and stations in broadcasting chains could be arranged quickly.
 New York-Millie Gade Corson and Ethelda Bleibtrey have been pinched for swimming. They got themselves arrested on purpose in order to test an ordinance which forbids swimming in city parks. They took a plunge in disused reservoir in Central park which sundry folks wish turned into a swimming pool.
 Amsterdam-Chan for a few wisecracks aA to Great Britain's like hhood of winning the Olympic games. A feature Of the British ex- hibit at an exposition Of Olympic art is a painting of the Prince Of Wales on horseback.
 New York-Morris Frank, o0- year-old student of Wander Uni versity. is back from Switzerland with specially trained "eyes' guar anteed to last eight or nine years. The "eyes" are a German Shepherd dog that leads his master around. Frank feels as though a new decla- ration of independence has been signed for him.
 Waynesburg, Pa,--Call anytime day or night and Hat married for nothing. George L. Zimmerman, vitation. His fee will be returned as q wedding present.
 New York-A theater under con struction will be known the Ethel Barrymore.
 London-The first woman honor ed by Oxford with the degree of Doctor of Literature Is Miss Eleanor Lodge. historian, teacher and sister of Sir Oliver Lodge, she is 50 years old.
 New York-Miss Barbara Hatch. society girl, is to help MT. Ziegfeld giorify She has signed a contract tn appear in the chorus. Her bronze hair is unbobbed. She does not drink or smoke.
 Buffalo. N. Y.-Americans are drinking more-milk. Consumption has increased 23.6 per cen, in six years. the national dairy counsel has been informed.
 New York--The Rev. Thomas H Whelpley is a Presbyterian minister by day and a taxi driver by night His purpose Is to learn more about New Workers the better to attend to their spiritual needs. He has found that sometimes the biggest tip comes from a chorus girl and sometimea a banker with q Park avenue resi- dence gives d nickel