davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-01-31
WASHINGTON -Posto 0 ffices

WASHINGTON - P is ffices for
sale?
If there were any such, one might
suppose that the postoffice depart
ment would be advertising them
But there was nothing in the annual
report of the postmaster general to
indicate that any were for sale or
that any postmaster jobs had been
sold during the year. Probably the
omission was correct one, because
the proceeds from sale of postmaster
ships go into the pockets Oh politicians
instead of into the DEPARTMENT.
receipts.
1t remained for the civil service
commission, a non-partisan govern
ment establishment. to assert in its
annual report that "in certain states
appointment to local positions, such
as postmasters, have been made by
virtual purchase of the office through
the guise of political contributions. .
The commission points out that there
is a fine and imprisonment penalty
for such offenSeS.
Certain members of the republican
national committee in the south, some
of them negroes, have been accused
of participating in the traffic in
postmasterships.
Then the commission goes on to
talk about women government work.
ers, as follows:
"Women in the government services
are increasing both in numbers and
the importance of their duties. Their
advance is especially noticeable in
the biological, economic and physical
science branches, and in law.
"There are nearly 10000 women
employees in the executive civil service.
Women probably fill more than half
the positions for which men and
women are equally suitable. Positions
of letter carrier, railway postal clerk
and mechanic are illustrations
of positions not suitable to women"
Since 1883 the commission has dis
claimed any discrimination against
women.
AS if foreseeing the furore that
would follow when prohibition officials
learned that most of their agents
had flunked the written mental
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-01-31

examination, the commission pre-
sented a full explanation of the test
by l., j. O'Rourke its director of
personnel research, in which it APP
pears that experienced agents were
actually given credit in ratings over
those applicants who hadn't served
in the prohibition service.
GAIL the material used in the
written examination was closely re-
lated to prohibition work." says
ORourke "The commission prepared
a special examination in which the
subject matter dealt entirely with
prohibition work and this test was
used in preference to the tests of
general adaptability already in use
in other examinations BY trial tests,
it was also proved that this test
actually did measure. general adap-
liability.
"Case items were designed to test
the extent of the applicants iudg-
ment in solving problems such as
arise in prohibition work. The prac-
Gicability of test which measures
reasoning ability is apparent when
it is realized that prohibition
O11ICGr III tIlG leu HlttSC O1lCAl ACly
upon his own judgment in handling
important situations.
"Items designed to measure the
applicants ability to interpret orders
on rulings were included, because
the prohibition officer must base his
action on his Interpretation of orders
and rulings issued by headquarters.
Vocabulary items were included To
test knowledge of the meaning OF
the words used in rules and regula-,
tions. Obviously, rules and regulations
can not be correctly interpreted
without knowledge Of the meaning
of the words in the regulations.
Previous studies, moreover, have in
dicated that vocabulary items have
also high value in selecting individ-
.uals of superior general intelligence"
Pains were taken to make the
examination such "as to make it
evident that any person who fails
to make a passing score does not
possess the qualifications that would
justify his being assigned to position
in the prohibition service"
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-01-31
Guard Priceless Heritage

Jon
the first
government to liberty.
wildly pictured it glory
Peans Carthage wealth;
large Of that for which they striving they fell because they
called attention while United States
founded body aved the OF strange land
Babylon better than wealth than
Carthage;
power either Germany.
O
prosperity but that when of the Gods of the ancens permitted
encroac liberty then will the danger point be reached the history
this government.
liberty human chemical in government that
ingredients above mentioned
effai
the Declaration
principles
There is as much danger in government having deuon OF grandeur
afflicted with
destruction
the constitution of the United States the rights of the
1hent
well
that rights surrendered
possible that apply
which they have been deprived by the intelligent of the ballot but the
emphasized
privilege anything
liberty
equal
portrayed by
Volet failure
much
There opportunity
nothing
standing the United
exploit pauperize
ballot is the buark the founders Of this
republic time stand against exploitation of
the government by selfish interests
in guarding their heritage males
will sppant liberty by license and install wealth
America
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-01-31
More Truth Than Poetry
By JAMES ]. MONTAGUE
If 1T WASN'T FOR FOOD

When I noticed one day that took
little zest
In the various tasks I essayed,
Looking forward all week to Sabbath
Day rest
In some sylvan and bloom sprinkled
shade
When the dreams of fortune I'd
harbored so long
Seemed to slip like wrath from
my clutch,
Mr.. Doctor informed me: ''Your system
is wrong
I'm convinced you are eating too
much"
So I cut out my luncheon and stuck
80 my pen
While my desk mates went out for
their chow,
And at once, though I noticed that
now and again
My stomach kicked up. quite row.
My interest in work grew little more
keen
My industry chirked quite bit,
And I felt more content with my lot,
ana serene
When at five, or five thirty I quit.
But still seemed to lack the old pep
I had once,
I found was just g. bit slow
I was somewhat appalled, with the
thought of the stunts
That I did twenty-five years ago.
My doctor, whose help applied for
again
Observed with pitying smile:
"It would benefit all of you over
worked men
If you cut out your breakfasts a
while"
So now I'm omitting my coffee and
toast
And find II my work the same joy
And eager desire to achieve things
almost
AS did when a lusty young boy.
My muscles are hard, my digestion is
fine
Though I'm getting little bit
thinner,
And I'm firmly convinced that that
fortune is mine
If I also can do without dinner
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-01-31
MASTER FARMERS" DO MAKE MONEY
Omaha Bee-NeWs)

The convention
the 1927 C. j. Caasen chair
publicity committee subjects the
to critic scrutiny.
a. began At
standing
But
than
i be
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-01-31
THE ENDURANCE FLIGHT
(NeW York World)

flights over oceans would 90
ponder Chmben and Roger @ Williams
aplane Although these are two OF the %
their plane thought had been
perfect mechanical shas Whch cou
hardly took Off The metal casing OF Ve
pas OF Che
developed eak ana as q
before they had done what Cn set
this plane been trying to get somewhere
kinds OF weather that are newt
mshap might forced down much sooner
had of water without single ship IN
then The snockgy long hSC O
missing the only TOO plainly one
thing is clear apane like other piece OF
remarkable things expected
of it, The time will be the aviator VINO plays
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-01-31
SIXTEEN YEARS AGO

t. B. Grace and family arrived
in Douglas yesterday from Ell Paso
and will make their home here.
Grace is representative OF the
James A. Dick company
Sarkis Jose Dominguez, merchant
of Naco and Cananea, was a bus1-
ness visitor in Douglas yesterday
Deputy Sheriff A. w. Howe was
in the city yesterday on official
business.
Mrs. w. S. Dixon will entertain
today at her home on Tenth
street for the benefit Of st. Cecilia
Guild.
Mrs. L. E. King, wife of the
pumpman at the city water works,
was injured yesterday while driv-
ing into town when she was
thrown from her automobile in a
collision with another car.
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-01-31
Home Brew Recent

Chase wild bullfrogs three miles
and gather up the hops TO them
add ten gallons of tan bark, one half
pint good shellac, and one bar of
home made soap. Boil So hours
then strain through 1. w. w. sock
to keep it from working. add one
grasshopper to each pint to give it
kick. Pour little in the kitchen
sink; if it takes the enamel off, it
is ready for bottling This receipt
is guaranteed to be legal.-Ex.
Cop to sweet young thing he has
just caught speeding: I'll have to
pinch you, Miss.
S. Y. T.: Gracious, now awful
well, if you must. officer, please
pinch where it won't show.
Not Satisfied
An old darky was sent to the
hospital and one of the nurses put
thermometer in his mouth to take
his temperature. Presently, when the
doctor made his rounds, he said:
"Well, Nose, have you had any
nourishment?"
l "A 4dOy OOA4O SA1A111lC d J1CCC Vi
glass to suck, boss, but rs still
powerful hungry"
"Have you some of that gasoline
that stops knocking?"
dyes"
"Then give my wife glass"
COnsiderate
"Are you going to give your daugh-
ter away at her wedding, Henry?"
asked Abe Nudge.
"Not by jugful!" snorted Henry
Hinkledam, the proud parent "If
she's smart enough to make that
young feller believe she's q years
old and never had another beau
I'm not going to disillusion the darn
fool!"
We always have wondered who
the fellow was that makes the paper
panties that go On lamb cnops.
Salesman (after trying to sell
tractor for two hours: You see
it's easy to handle, and the price is
very low. Now, I'll throw in the
clutch.
Farmer: BY golly, that's all I've
been waiting for, I knowed I'd get
something extra if I'd hold out
awhile.
''What was the name of the hotel
you stopped at in Denver, dear?"
"Oh, I can't remember lie name
just a second and I'll look through
my towels"
Tourist in western town: suppose
men still die around here with theil
boots on?
Sheriff: Yep. But 'taint from six
shooters now as much as from six
cylinders
John husband Ito friend wife)
There's limit to all things. ]
don't mind washing dishes. don't
mind feeding the cat. I don't mind
mending my own clothes. But I'll
be burned if I'll wear pink ribbons
on my nightshirts to fool the baby
Needed Practice
Lord Babbington was instructing the
new colored servant in his duties
adding: "Now, Zeke, when / ring
for you, you must answer me by
saying, My Lord, what will you
have?'"
A few hours afterwards, having
/ S-.o..----~-~oo->~o@~>
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-01-31
PZucked From the Plains

occasion to summon the servant, his
lordship was astonished with the
following:
my. Gawd, what does you want
now?"
The usual flapper from boarding
school had just returned home, and
the father remarked: MY dear, I
think you are thinner"
U. F. F. B. S.: Oh, no. daddy,
weigh about the same stripped for
gym
Father: And who in the he'll is
Jim?
TOnsilitic
George: Comm to nah pahty
Sam? We gonna have whole gallon
O. corn.
Sam: 'Nupp, can't do it, George
We'se got case O. tonsilitis over
to my house.
George: A whole case? Say, Sam,
can't we have that pahty to yo'
house?
Prof to student; What did Horatius
do at the bridge?
Stude Probably trumped his part
ners ace, the darned fool
Old lady Gas car gives jolt):
Was that a serious accident, con-
ductor?
Conductor: Not to us, madam, the
car just ran over dog.
O. L.: Was it on the track?
c.: No, we chased him up an
alley.
Hunting a Nut
Attendant: There's man outside
who wants to know if any OF the
patients have escaped lately.
Director of the asylum: Why does
he ask?
Attendant: He says some one has
run away with his wife.
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-01-31
ABE MARTIN

One would think we belonged T.
tn league o. nations from tn way
''Our boys" are bein' moved down
in Nicaraugy. "Oh, it wuz so
blamed cold Sunday we jest stayed
t. home an played cards t. see
who'd git tn divorce" said Mrs.
EN- MOOtS' niece t'day.
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-01-31

President Ccsgrave called Chicago
an unbelievable city," and here, all
the time, we had thought it was
only the mayor who was spoofing us
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-01-31
FIRST AID

Teaching Annapolis cadets golf will
at least help them accumulate the
kind of vocabularies they'll need if
they ever go into action.
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-01-31

During the World war veterinarians
found a way to make mules quit
braying. Would it be too much to
ask one of the political parties TO
nominate some veterinarian for vice
president?
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-01-31
FIFTY-FIFTY

1t is said that the slot machines are
keeping pennies in circulation. The
converse is also true
Copyright, 1928, Bell Syndicate, Inc.)
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-01-31
REASON ENOUGH

Music is now played to college STU
dents before they take exams prob
ably to soothe the savage tests.
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-01-31

An animal that was half skunk
and half cat was exhibited at
cat show in Boston the other day.
We always have been grea; admirers
of the skunk's facial contour.
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-01-31

Perhaps one of the, reasons the
Anti-Saloon league doesn't run 81
couple of dry newspapers is the
congressional record.
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-01-31
BARBS

Clothes are destroying morality in
the South Sea islands, says British
official. At any rate, America is
getting more righteous every DAY.
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-01-31

Geraldine Farrar says youth is
largely in the mind. We've noticed
that, too.
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-01-31

Needed Practice
Lord Babbington was instructing the
new colored servant in his duties,
adding: "Now Zeke, when ring
for you, you must answer me by
saying, My Lord, what will you
have?'"
A few hours afterwards, having
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-01-31

Cop to sweet young thing he has
just caught speeding: I'll have to
pinch you, Miss
S. Y. T.: Gracious, now awful
well, if you must, officer, please
pinch where it won't show
New Britain herald., 1928-04-30

Board of Missions will be held at the windsor avenue church in Hartford, tomorrow. May l. The regular meeting of the local society will be cancelled in order that members may attend the gathering in Hartford.
 Next Sunday morning the regular Communion service will be held and a special reception for new mcm- bers.
 Accident on Swamp Road
 car driven by Attorney F. F McDonoush of New Britain and an auto operated by William IIolley of "9l Albany avenue. Hartford, colid- cd yesterday on the Beech Swamp road. damaging the McDonough car. Inc accident occurred as Hollcv turned off the road 10 enter q gar age. Constable Frank Brown is in- Nestigating the accident.
 East Berlin Items
 on Wednesday afternoon at Con- munlty hall the Lefano club will hold q public whist to which all in- terested are invited to attend. The proceeds from the whist will be turned over to the library for the purchase of books and equipment, The committee in charge of the event have insofar as possible issued personal invitations. but any who has not received one is cordially invited by the committee 10 attend.
 This evening the ladies of Sacred Heart church will hold their regular weekly whist in the church social rooms at o'clock.
 Charles Fiske. |. s. N., has re- turned to his ship at Boston after a 15-day furlough spent here with his parents. Mir. and Mrs. Charles Fiske.
 Ernest Bourgeois. U. s. N., will ar rive here Saturday for 8 furlough to be spent with his parents, MT. and Mrs. Amos Bourgeois. He has just returned from a three months south- ern cruise. most of the time being spent in Cuban waters.
 Mir. and Mrs, Henry Mildrum of Bridgeport spent the weekend here as the guests of Mir. and Mrs. l.. w. Mildrum.
 The Community club program for Wednesday evening will consist of an old fashioned dance with prompt ing done by Harold Gates, who is known throughout Connecticut for his calling off," The committee for
New Britain herald., 1928-04-30

To sell or rent--Two new homes, modern improvements. Inquire l.. x, Lama, Langdon Ct. kensington.
New Britain herald., 1928-04-30
WATER PURCHASE | COMMITTEE NAMED
Will Investigate Feasibility Of
 Municipal Water Plant
TO INSTITUTE NEW LODGE
Organizer of Shepherds of Bctllle- hem Here Thursday-Mr. Wyck- oN's Resignation Aspptel-Clean- up Starts Tomorrow,

The personnel of the committee of visibility of having the town pur- chase the Flainvillc Water Co. and conduct a municlpaily owned water plant was announced today by the selectmen. In accordance with the motion made by Frank J. O'Brien at the recent town meeting, four mem bers Of this committee were ap- pointed by stanley $. Gwillin,, who was chairman Of the meeting. and the other three by tho board of sc- lectmcn.
 MT. Gwilim named Frank ]. oBrlen, Harry 0. Rex, Edward r. Srastow, and Burton II. Phelps. The selections of the selectmen were Henry $. Washburn. William Cooke, and Attorney Cornelius Prior. First Selectman James Simpson is also a member eN officio.
 Mir. O'Ercn is a. member of the school committee and it was he who moved that the water company pur- chase committee be appointed. Mir. fleN LOOK a prominent part in the dlscusslon over the increase in water rentals at the recent meeting and mas been active in all town meetings and affairs in late months. Mir. frastoW is another school commit tee'han' while Mir. Phelps is a former president of the Chamber of Com merce and both have long been prominent in town affairs. Henry x. Washburn, third member Of the school committee. was recently elect cd Nlcc-prcsident Of the Chamber or Commerce and has been on num- erous important committees during recent months. Mir. Cooke, a real tor, was member Of the revalua- tion committee. Attorney Prior also helped in that work and served on the committee which investigated the water rates.
 A meeting of the new committee Will be called at an early date, when organization will be made and this highly important matter begun.
 To Institute New Lodge
 4 new lodge of the Order of shep- herds Of Bethlehem of North Amer lea. will be instituted here on Thurs day evening in Legion hall. The
New Britain herald., 1928-04-30
MEMORIAL PLANS
 ARE FORMULATED Exercises Will Be Held May
 30 at g a. M.
 WILL BE IN KENSlNGl0N Berlin Grange to Conduct Ncigl,bor's Night Tomorrow E,cning-Boy and Girl Scouts Meetings-Praycr Mectings-Interesting Items.
WILL BE IN KENSINGTON

About 16 were present at the an nual meeting of the general Me morial day committee held yesterday afternoon in the Peck Memorial li- brary, kensington. The meeting was called by Robert 0. Clark. After the reading Of the minutes Of the last meeting, officers were elected for 1928.
 It was voted to hold the exercises on Wednesday morning. May 80. in hensington at 9 o'clock daylight sav- ing time. Following the parade eX- ercises will be held at the monument and Congregational church.
 The officers and committees se- Iected are as follows: General chair man. Dr. Matthew II. Griswold; secretary. Arthur II. Bushnell and treasurer, William w. Pagan; ceme- tery committee. Berlin district. Henry A. Austin. Howard Bunce and Edgar M. Pickett: East Berlin dis trict, Arthur Benson. Henry A. Bar tram and Walter Payne; Bridge and Bcckley districts. Arthur H. Bush nell, Paul c. Strange. and Orvillc Ncntres; Kensington district, William Ritchie, Thomas Pagan. Paul C. Baker and Joseph Wilson; finance committee. Claude w. Stevens: music committee. Paul G. Strange; committee to secure spea kcrs, Rev Vernon L.. Phillips; program com mittee, Mrs. Sidney NJ. Cowlcs, chair an. M. II. Griswold. Rev. Vernon l.. Phillips. Paul c. Strange, Miss Mary GrisNold, Mrs. George F. Green and Harry Mckeon: marshal of parade, George F. Green.
 Berlin Grange Meeting
 The Berlin Grange will hold it's regular meeting Tuesday evening at 7;3o o'clock daylight saving time. Neighbors' Night will be observed with the following outside Oranges: New Britain. West Hartford. New inston and Avon. Each visiting Grange will furnish two numbers on inc program. All members are asked to be present as important business will be brought up. The meeting will start promptly at 7.so o'clock. so as to have the business part over in time to give outside Oranges q chance 10 put on their programs. A social time and danc- ing will follow. Refreshments will be served after the meeting. The chairman of the refreshment com mittee is Mrs. William Whitman.
 May Day Party
 Plans for the May Day party are practically completed and the affair promises 10 be very popular. It is being sponsored by the Kensington League of Women Voters and will be held in the new storehouse of the Berlin Auto Sales Company on Pennington avenue. The company has denoted the use of the store house for the affair The proceeds of the affair will be given to the Visiting nurse. the party being hold in connection with the National Health Day" observance. It seems fitting that Berlin should have some health day observance and the con- nlttee in charge has been husily working out the details and nothing short of bad weather should prevent the party from being great success. -..--
New Britain herald., 1928-04-30
VETERINARIANS TO MEET

The spring meeting Of the Con necticut Veterinarian Medical Asso- ciation will be held in this city on Wednesday. May ?. when an all day clinic will be held The sessions will be held at the hospital of Dr. R, D. Radcliffe on Franklin square. with a luncheon at the Burritt ho are expected 10 attend
New Britain herald., 1928-04-30

the evening have arranged a naddi- 'lohal program of entertainment. Refreshments will be served during the evening. Arrangements are being made 10 accommodate 15o.
 Miss Doris Phudhon is seriously i'll at her home with diphtheria.
 NIT. and Mrs. R. R. Stevenson and family motored 10 New Haven Sun- day. where they visited relatives.
 The illustrated lecture on Italy which was to have been held at the Methodist church last evening was postponed until next Sunday evening. the slides not arriving on schedule. The program will be completed at that time.
 Miss Carolyn Read is spending a few days in West Cromwell as the guest Of he, grandmother.
 The Mattebesset river sas come LID 10 flood stage and is but few feet from the floor of the bridge near the Westfield depot. It is not expected, however, that the water will come much higher. The meadows around the lower part Of West Cromwell and East Berlin are completely flooded, the heavy rain of the past several days being largely respon- sible for this condition.
 One train has been taken of the, Berlin branch in conjunction with the daylight saving schedule. The train leaving Berlin at 3 a. m. has been discontinued so that at present there is no train from Berlin be- tween 1855 a. m. and II a. m. The train leaving Berlin at 2:03 D. m. was also taken off under the new schedule, but it was announced this morning that this train had been re- stored to the schedule. it being the train on which the school children were accustomed 10 ride.
 This week meeting Of the Social Five will be held at the home Of Mrs, Edward kahms on Cottage street.
 The Pythian Sisters will meet this evening at s o'clock in their rooms at Community hall.
 The Modern Woodmeu will meet this evening at s o'clock at Athletic hall
 To sell or rent-Two new homes, modern improvements. Inquire l.. N Lama JanedOn Ct kensjnrton
New Britain herald., 1928-04-30
Services to Be Held
 Tomorrow for Spencer

Hartford. April 30 OUP) P)-Funeral services for Ira. II. Spencer. pioneer in the invention and development of turbine engines. will be held at Trinity church here tomorrow
 Spencer died Saturday night in his 55tll year after d short illness.
 He was president Of the Spencer Turbine Company. the Spencer Fur hine Cleaner Company and tho Spencer Organ Company. He was reported to have held more than 100 patents on mechanical devices con- nected with the turbine motor.