The Washington times., 1928-09-12
1t Rarely Does,
Miss Fairfax
Declares
BY Beatrice Fairfax
An Authority ON Problems Of
Love and Marriage

CTS it possible to love more than
y once?"
That is the question Anxious
asked me the other day in q
letter printed in this column
And anxious girls have been ask
ing the question these many
years.
Anxious IL Is. She lie desper-
Ately in love. Her parents OBJ
tected to her engagement be-
cause they said she was TOO
young. So the young man she
loved went away, ana now
Anxious feels that she can never,
never love anyone else.
Here is a reply to your letter.
dear Anxious, from another reader
of this column, who signs her.
self Almost Twenty"
''Dear Miss Fairfax:
THE letter of Anxious, who Is
sixteen and thinks she is in love
with a young man or twenty
prompts me to write Of my own
experience. hope very much
she will read this letter and Will
be able to profit from it., or at
least will think-and think sert-
Ously-before attempting mar
riage.
At fifteen / fell in love with
q young man Of nineteen. It was
Just plain crazy about him. !
worshipped him as q Greek idol.
He was very handsome and .
wonderful dancer. He belonged
to my church but was not an &C.
tive member, and he was q heavy
drinker and gambler. My parents
forbade me to see him.
He pledged sincere love, ana
IN return received all my I'M
spoiled, fresh kisses. What q
fool l was. But / could not see
1t that way. I kept on seeing
him, although my parents scolded.
Finally had sense enough 10
quit going with him. Oh, but it
was hard! ] cried and cried most
OF the time for him. But my
weeping was not in vain, as !
learned q great lesson.
AT IL I was going about with
another young man who had the
same first name as my former
sweetheart. You can imagine the
memories that name brought back.
Sometimes / could not restrain
myself from wishing he was the
other Jim.
"At present am going with
still another young man. He also
IL named Jim. Ard feel he il
really the one man. have told
him everything about the other
two.
IT don't even give the first
one a thought any more. ] real
ize Just how foolish I was. ana
19 now--nearly 20--While my
friend is 22. He IL a good, strong
church member, il handsome and
IN all-round jolly friend. We are
going to wait two years before
we marry 80 can finish my
music.
Dear Anxious, you may be
Rure, positively sure, that your
parents are right in deciding you
are too young to become engaged.
l know this letter is long, but 1
felt / had TO tell Anxious about
love.
ALMOST TWENTY"
Thank you for your letter.
Almost Twenty. ] Sm sure Anxi-
Gus will be cornforred, for you
write with the conviction born of
experience.
IT Is quite true We love more
than once. By that ] mean that
we may fancy ourselves in love
MANY times before real love, the
deep devotion and affection that
satisfies heart ana mind, comes
10 us.
Almost Twenty was true to her
Is years when she fell in love
at that age with a wonderful
dancer"
DO not trust too much yoIIr
own love at Is. Test IT, by the
sure tests OF time and absence.
Absence is q far wiser lest Of love
than any companionate union
could be. IT may be that after
four yesrs OF absence and change
you and he may still care for
each other; such things have hap
pened. If you DO, you viii know
that You are the exception prov
ing the rule that fret Iowa is not
lasting love or wise love on which
To base marriage.
You may love many timee. Some
cynical folk claim a. man can love
as many women Is there are
women in the world. But the fact
remains that most Of these 80.
called loves are only tnfatuations
or faDciea or piatonic affection.
They may seem beautiful while
they last. And If we let them
they may teach us lessons in
sympathy end wisdom and under
atanding. however hopeless and
unhappy they may seem at The
time.
But after eli there Is only one
great, all-absorbing love in a life.
time. TT comes usually when we
have grown UP mentally and spir-
JtuaIly as well as physically.
Happy Is the man or woman who
has found this tender, unselfiSh
affection, this love of a lifetime
and is fine enough TO cultivate
and hold 1T fast through years OF
happy marriage.