davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-03-02
WHO? WHY, HOOVER
(Buffalo Evening News

blind the flashes which lighting the
that the presidential in
reached the proportions Of great popular
the recognize the kind
they want
of the United
enthusiastic asking Hoover
they confidence know Hoover
mean to
President
Coohdges judgment No
information needed to reveal that Mr.
popular sentiment for Hoover OF
he anything
the themselves choosing his
his closest friends
be eated?
that representative
This recognition of the popular demand
dparagmen
presidential
that the party filled Only
whose first
public
That
people already
that
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-03-02
BARBS

Van Campen Heilner doesn't be-
lieve certain. sharks will bite men
SO he has gone to the Bahamas
to test his theory. If he comes
back we hope he investigates fur
ther in the loan offices.
Cheer up! we know radio
soprano who has tonsilitis and
won't be able to sing for couple
of weeks.
A tooth. millions of years old,
found in Nebraska, has been iden-
titled as pigs. The hunt for oil
is age-old.
We refuse to believe that a toad
placed in a cornerstone in Texas,
lived there 81 years, until we hear
there were some tourists initials
on it.
Herbert Hoover says an angler
should be allowed to catch so fish
a year. He's hoping for a good
many more than that in Kansas
City in June.
Scientists say that sound travels
about 1000 feet per second, but
they probably have never been
around a bunch of democrats whis-
pering at convention.
Congress- is planning to give
Colonel Lindbergh medal. We
just knew some congressman would
pick up a newspaper some day and
read something besides his own
interview
(Copyrignt, 1923, NEA Service, Inc.)
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-03-02
FeIicitous Occasion

TODAY SHOULD MARK history
Aqua Piea Topete
Sonora meet at the international
The
national airport at this point
made already wkn
abandoned in view OF
the general custom that dcatory
a IS
The time dedicate equipped
atmosphere
preferably
suggested
heretofore.
nng ami
between Topee as the
official representatives their respective states
benefit OF
friendship is in that officially
Furthermore
better
disposition
Governor Tope, who Chapuep
Festivities will
governors on the border
Tope
the attention port
ambitious air lines the capital
Governor disposition to assist Douglas
IN securing station
IN the months
for this port
chamber of men of Douglas
meeting the
the machinery the
publications of border rules
certain that the
boosters
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-03-02
With Other Editors
A HOBBLE FOR THE HECKLER
REFORMED
(New York Herald Tribune)

difficulty preserving
the of audience at political
hecke to hearts
badnage unchecked
supposed
official
been evidence o organized
elements sections OF the
meetings
it provided that in future chief
OF all recognized political parties station
the with certain jealous satisfaction
suggestion
Now however that
hot air. but heckhng
hot air. One at
to something to be said for
whatever the purport OF
S possible to get up and leave
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-03-02

Taxes on personal property and real
estate paid in 1927 are deductible and
so are state income tax payments. so
are customs duties. Admission taxes,
too, but the government insists that
you must have kept an account of
them all year long, which is generally
too much bother
Losses are deductible when incurred
in transaction entered into for protit
or in case of fire, storm, Shipwreck.
flood, frost, other casualty or theft,
whether connected with business or
not, insofar as they are not covered
by insurance. Loss on house or
automobile purchased for other than
business use, for instance, may not be
deducted Jewelry stolen may be count
ed in, but jewelry merely lost may not.
Bad debts, if incurred on money
loaned with expectation of repayment,
may be deducted. The bureau of in.
ternal revenue asks for an eXplana-
ton of these with the return Con-
tributions to charitable, religious, SCI
entific, literary, educational or HUI
name organizations may be deducted
up to Is per cent of the net income
exclusive of them, but anyone who
deducts Is per cent for contributions
had better be prepared to prove them.
1t is necessary to list such contribu-
tionS on the return. of course, and
gifts to individuals don't count.
World war bonuses, pensions and
allowances are generally non-taxable.
Strike benefit payments aren't. The
value of goods or board and lodging
received in payment for services is
taxable TRAVELLING expenses when on
business are deductible, except for
commuters, but full statements of
these should be attached to the re-
turn Depreciation may be claimed on
business property for exhaustion, wear
and tear and obSoleScence.
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-03-02

WASHINGTON.-T of us who
managed to make out our own in
come tax returns last year ought to
be able to do it again
The rules remain the same.
In fact, one of the very best tips
for taxpayer is the suggestion that
he retain a duplicate of his return
for reference next year. The figures
will be larger, it is to be hoped, but
any forgotten kinks of procedure will
be there to refresh ones memory.
First, get your return blank Incl
dentally, you will find plenty of valu-
able information attached to the re-
turn.
If you're a single man earning less
than $500 net income you're fortu-
nate for two reasons. The second one
is that you needn't file any return.
Married persons of less than $500 net
income are we'll off in the same re-
spect, but anybody whose gross in
come is more than $4,000 must fill the
blank.
The tiny 1040A blanks are for net
incomes not above $4,000 when derived
chiefly from salaries and wages. The
lO40 blanks are for all other individ-
ual taxpayers Net income is gross
income minus deductions for such
matters as business expenses, losses,
interest paid, bad debts, depreciation
of business property and taxes other
than federal income tax.
Probably most of us are especially
interested in the deductions we can
take off to lower our taxable or net
income. No one should have trouble
entering his items of gross income.
Interest which has been paid or
accrued On Indebtedness comes first.
The only exception is when one pays
interest on another'S debt.
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-03-02
FASTENED OWN DOWNFALL
(Tucson Starr


reveals that
Intoxicating
ihon
the
the treasury department
one per alcohol
and
effect is rather humorous that
he brewers themselves
long
downfall
than all together
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-03-02
There Was the evidence

A woman was talking with a friend
about the athletic achievements OF
the latter'S son,
''Your boy must be an exceptionally
fast runner. 1 see this morning S
paper states that he fairly burned
up the track under his record
breaking speed 1 suppose you saw
him do it?"
mo, / didn't see him do it," re-
piled the boys mother, but 1 saw
the track this morning and there was
nothing but cinders there"
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-03-02
More Truth Than Poetry
By JAMES J. MONTAGUE
CRUEL TO BE KIND

New York policemen have been
instructed to be courteous.
I never am pleased when two listed
AS my way in my car I pursue
Past sign which says boldly and
blatantly STOP"
Calls out to me rudely "Hi your
writhe at the words. that he shouts
in my ear
My sensitive feelings to rack,
And it's only because I am frozen
with fear
That I don't try to answer him
back
When a blue coated man with a
badge or star
Instead OF observing "Tut Tutw
AS he catches me furtively parking
my car '"n
Cries: "Hey, move along there, you
multi"
The pride OF a citizen throbs in my
veins
am hurt to my innermost soul,
But my instinct of thoughtful dis
cretion remains
And sling to the old self control
I know that policemen are human,
like me
I know that they have no real
right,
When Slight violations CT law they
may see,
To be SO gol darned impoIite
I can never get used to the things
that they say
To the folk of the street and the
mart
And when their remarks are directed
my way,
Each word leaves a scar on my
heart.
And yet if cop, when I ran past
a sign lt
Or parked by the sidewalk toe long
Should murmur, Perhaps it's no
business OF mine
But according to law, you are
wrong"
I should make him repeat such a
statement by rote
To be perfectly sure what he'd
said.
And then with my hands clutch
ing hard at my throat
I should struggle for breath and
drop dead
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-03-02
ABE MARTIN

"a fairly good lOOkin', designin'
woman hos got any man beat
mile when it comes t. hypnotic power
an cruel cunnin', an tnat's w1y
we never see any male snake charm
ers," declared Ludlow MapeS fday.
photographs cabIed from London look
like they. must have lots O. cczemy
over there.
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-03-02
Something Else!

Miss Ethel is long time coming
down." said the youth to the servant,
after waiting for some time for the
young lady's appearance. Perhaps, ="
he added, with a laugh, perhaps she
is making up her mind whether to
see me or rot"
mo-" said the servant, ut isn't her
mind she is making up"
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-03-02
Considerate Sor1l

He was working on high building.
when he fell In falling, he man
aged to grasp telegraph wire.
Hold on!" yelled his mates, and
ran for a mattress. But he let 60
On his recovery he was asked why
he didn't hold on.
"Well," he said, II was afraid the
wire would break"
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-03-02
PZucked From the Plains
An Advantage Of MonOgamy

An Advantage OIL MOnOgamy
"I'm glad 1 have only one vile
to learn to drive car" groaned
Smith.
Finding it expensive, eh?" laughed
Jones.
Expensive doesn't half tell it,"
replied Smith, sc far I've paid for
replacing one fireplug six telephone
poles, three fences and Is ruined
tenders on other peoples cars"
"Bobbing parties" at which girl
guests trim one another's hair arc
becoming so popular in England that
they are affecting the barDer busi-
ness.
my wife is very thrifty She made
me tie out OF her old dress"
"And my wife made herself dress
out OF one OF my ties"
Banker (telephoning): Mr.. Cohen,
do you know your account is over
drawn $17?"
Mr.. Cohen Say Mr.. Banker, look
up a month ago. How did stand
then? I'll hold the phone.
Banker returning to the phone)
You had a balance of s4O0.
Mr.. Cohen: Veil, did call you up?
"Lcndcn is the foggiest place In
the world"
"Oh, no, it's not, I've been in
place foggier than London
where was that?"
"I don't know where il was, it
was so foggy."
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-03-02
NO TROUBLE

NO TROUBLE
The delegates and visitors will all
be able to get into the kansas City
convention hall. The town is used
to packing houses.
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-03-02
~-------~---
SIXTEEN YEARS AGO

Arthur Houle left last evening
for New York. where he will be
for several weeks on business.
Mrs. j. j. Glenn left Yesterday
for the ranch i'll the Chiricahuas,
where she is having a residence
erected.
r. f. Kchler. a mining machin-
cry salesman, passed through the
city yesterday en- route tc Ell
PaSo.
Two bridges were burned YES
terday on the Nacozari by bandits,
and it was reported that 200 men
were on the way to occupy Aqua
Prieta. Mexican officials we're
busy all day bringing to this side
Of the line all their books and
official records for safety in case
OF trouble.
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-03-02
Too Proud To Bet

Senator Borah, discussing an un-
satisfactory answer that had been
made to a charge o. corruption,
smiled and said:
"It reminds me OF the English but.
Ter. His employer said to him:
Houston, bet you've been at my
Scotch
"'HeXcuse me, sair, sai6 Houston
in MS naughty way. 'HexcuGe me,
but I don't bet.'
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-03-02
A Clear Verdict

The following was the verdict by a
jury in suit against railroad
company:
eff the train had run as it should
have run; if the bell had rung as it
should have rung; if the whistle had
blowed as it should have blew, both
of which it did neither-the COW
would not have been injured when
she was killed"
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-03-02
Ask Noah, He Knows

ASK NUdHI Tie hIIUWS
A mule driver was trying to drive
his mule through a gate. The stub
born animal would do anything ex-
cept go through that gate.
"Want any help, chunl?" asked a
passerby.
mo-" replied the driver, "out I'd
like to, know how Noah goo two OF
these blighterS into the Ark!"
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-03-02
Involuntary Heroism

! Georgia (returning home Soaked) ::
Don't be angry, mother, because I've
/ just saved three men and two women
from drowning.
Mother: Good gracious! How?
Georgia: Why, they were just going
on the ice when I fell through.
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-03-02

Doctor" gasped a patient rushing
into the medicos office, what dc
you recommend for snake blte?"
"FIave you been bitten by snake?'
asked the physician.
"You answer my question first"
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-03-02

HIGH EFFICIENCY
One thing the undergraduate never
fails to learn in college is the prices
of coon skin coats.
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-03-02
A Modern Antique


Dealer in antiques: Yes, this cake
basket belonged to Queen Elizabeth.
Customer: But it's labeled "Birm-
ingham!"
Dealer: It was presented to her h.
, the city.
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-03-02
Fair Logic

He: Seems to me women would
rather have beauty than brains.
She: OF course. Most men are
stupid, but few are blind.
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-03-02
LITTLE CHANCE

LITTLE CHANGE
The next great war will be with
insects. And Instructions to keep
your powder dry will be needful as
it is now.
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-03-02

Cheer up! We know radio
soprano who has tonsilitis and
won't be able to sing for couple
of weeks
Douglas daily dispatch., 1928-03-02

A tooth. millions of years old,
found in Nebraska. has been iden-
titled as a pigs. The hunt for oil
is age-old
New Britain herald. [microfilm reel] (New Britain, Conn.) 1890-1976, 1928-08-18
PLENTY OF BASEBALL FOR
FANS HERE OVER WEEK END
Fa'cons Clashing With Taftville Club at t. Mary's
1" s,u 1omorrc" hens'neton to Nee Windsor
no txs IN % Aensneton Ioday-Burritts Scheduled
Battle With Holyoke Champs at Washirrton IA.
mond - Sokols Seeking Revenge Agains Collins.
vile Crew.

Baseball fans in this city will have
plenty OF baseball enjoyment owe,
the weekend. Three local teams are
slated to stage home games while
kensington will be in Bristol battling
the Endees there at Muzzy Field
Falcons-Taft,ille
The Falcon baseball team will,
meet the Taftville aggregation in
what should be the banner attraction
OF the season at st. Mary's Field.
The game will start at o'clock and
1t Is being regarded as test for
both as to their right 10 claim the
semi-pro title of the state.
In addition to the game, an added
feature Is being scheduled in the
plans of the Falcon club official to
honor Johnny klatka. klatka Is the
Oldest veteran on the team In point
OF service and the day has been
after him.
kenstngton at Home
kensington is meeting the Wind
sor Locks team at the Percival ave.
nue. grounds In kensington TODAY.
The game IL one that was originally
slated to take place In Torrington
out a revision Of the playing sched-
lle brings the latest entry into the
Connecticut State league to kensing-
ION The game will start promptly
New Britain herald. [microfilm reel] (New Britain, Conn.) 1890-1976, 1928-08-18

at 3 o'clock.
Tomorrow the Kensinaon tear
VIII battle the Bristol hdees ~
Muzzy Field In Bristol. Thu alan {.
contest In the Connectict state
league.
Burfftts- Holyoke
Fiaying their second game d the
ne" Washington diamond. the M,r.
r'''s are scheduled to meet toxh
aggregation in the Holyoke Pokh
Ah-stars. This visiting team hs
copped the championship OF Il
Paper City for two consecutive So.
seasons and they are out to add tn,
burrltts TO their list of victims,
SokOls-Cullins, lille
At Willow Brook park on Diamond
NO. l. the Sokol baseball team will
meet Collfnsville in a return game.
Collinsvllle defeated the locals last
sunday in Collinsville. According to
reports brought home by the local
contingent of players and fans, the
umplres were not efficient and
through their work the sokols we're
denied several chances of winning.
Paul will arbitrate the game to-
morrow and the sokols confidently
expect to walk away with a decisive
The contest will start at Z
o'clock.
New Britain herald. [microfilm reel] (New Britain, Conn.) 1890-1976, 1928-08-18

.S'S; Lindgren, Rangers. .375; Lutv.
Burritts. .355; Carlson. Pirates, $50:
Weir, Pirates .34s: Sheehan, West
Ends. .$4s: Hayes. Rangers, ,3sa:
Htnchey, Tabs, 1888: Kane. Tabs
1913; Smithwick. West Ends, .3sa:
Elton, Rangers, .S13; Charlov.
Pirates sos: Basil. West Ends, .:0s:
+. Rose, Burritts, 1904.
Charley kredar not only broke hi.
600 average but got two hit. and
jumped to Jos. This leaves last place
10 be fought out between Grace of
tne Tabs and Partyka of the Bur-
rl'ts' who have made no hits in ten
ana nine tries, respectively. An.
otiler worthy rival is Nenberx of the
Rangers with his .0s3 average.
The Burritts replaced the pirates
NJ the top OF the INST In team batting.
moving up to Ell while their rival,
,all off to .271. The West Ends are
n1tlng for .25S, the Rangers for
.eo' the Cardinals for .2o6, and the
abs for .l7S. The Burritts increased
eelr team fielding lead and have an
aerage Of 1856, followed by the
Isngers with .9l6, Pirates with $40.
Ias with 1856, and West Ends and
Cdd1nals with 1854 each.
New Britain herald. [microfilm reel] (New Britain, Conn.) 1890-1976, 1928-08-18
GAME IN DARKNESS
WON BY ST. MATS
South Church Goes Down In
Post.Sunset Encounter


The South Congregational church
pennant hopes dashed themselves
out against the st. Matthews Ger.
man Lutherans last night In an In.
ter-Church league baseball game
which was not over and won until
long after night had settled upon
Willow Brook park. The game was
weird affair all the way. culminat-
ing in two furious rallies in the
darkness which gave the st. Mats
Is victory. The losers outhit the
st. Mats and had the bases seeth-
ing In almost every inning. but they
were outsmarted at every turn by
team which sprang trick after trick
and took advantage Of numerous
brain lapses of its opponents. Slow
outfielding cost the South Church
the game, about half Of the winners
eight hits being easy flies which
should have been caught.
An error and Parker's hit put the
South church ahead in the first in
ming but. though they filled bases
with none out the losers could not
score further. suess getting the next
three batters with ease. The st.
Mats tied the score in the second.
but the losers sent Rockwell around
with another run in the third. In
their half the winners counted three
times after two men were out, a
punky fly which fell safe in left CEN
ter doing most of the damage.
In the fifth and sixth innings
darkness crept over the held. but the
st. Mats held their advantage by
trapping runners on the bases ana
spelling threats. The seventh. how
ever was something else again.
Mcrey opened with a single and
Donald Hattings. who had twice fall
I'd in the pinches before, finally
came through with 4 long home run
to left field, tying the score. Two
more hits were followed by Stelma's
double. which put the South church
ahead. but r. HattinEs was out at
the plate, and the rally was checked !
right afterward.
In the second half. with two OF. |
and the count three and two, Eddie
Preisser lifted short hy to center
which scored r. Fink from second
Billy Preisser followed with a pop
back Of second which barely eluded
Rockwells grasp and the game was
over.
The line-ups and score by innings: /
South Congregational: Rockwell,
2b: Parker Id: Barta. IS: Morey. p;
Df Hattings, 3b; Potts. If: Spring,
CT: r. Hattinss, CT. RI: stelma, c; A.
Iewett, rf.. II.
st. Matthews German Lutheran:
F.. Preisser. ID: W. Preisser. 3d.. r:
l.. Neumann. IS: W. Fink. c; o.
steegc. II; Q. suess, ?, sb: shubert.
2b; r. Fisk, CT; Haliks, ri.
South Cong. '. l0l 600 as Is I
st. Mats. go. 013 060 2-6 S
limpires-Paul and H. Rittner.
The Swedish Bethany Everyman's
Bible class game was called of be-
cause neither team had more than
two men present.
Games Next Week
On Monday night the Stanley
Memorial team will play the First /
'aptists and the Trinity Methodists |
will meet the supreme test in fac
ing the st. Mats. The Bible class
also plans to play Oft its game with
he Swedish Bethany team that :
hight The South church will meet !
he First Lutherans on Friday eve
ling. when the Swedish Bethany {
proposes the First Daptists
New Britain herald. [microfilm reel] (New Britain, Conn.) 1890-1976, 1928-08-18
DUSTY LEAGUE
BALL INTERESTING
Stanley Workers Lead Strong
Aggregation This Year

interest in Industrial league base
ball reached its highest peak this
year and record crowds gathered ut
the scene Of action at Walnut Hill
park weekly to see the factory az
eregations In action. In spite of the
tact that the players We're forced to
put in hard days work UP until
within an hour before the game. the
fans have been treated to good
baseball. Some OF the best games
played in this city have taken place
IN the Industrial league pnd the
rams have shown their appreciation
BY Hooking to the park in hun
drcds every week
The fight of the Stanley Works
team for the championship OF the
league accounted for the great inter-
est in the league race. For years
J the Workers have come within
srasplng point of the title but
missed by narrow margins. The
team finished up In second place re-
peatedly. always finding first place
so near but yet so far. Last season
the Lake street crew battled
throughout the season on even terms
with the Corbin team and ended IN
IN tie for first place.
The Corbin team came through Ia
win the playoff game and ended the
workers chance to win their first
championship. During the past
BASKETBALL season the Stanley Works
aggregation. after bad start. be-
came the sensation of the league Int
Ialtered near the end and had to be
content with sitting back and watch
ing another championship fade from
its grasp
Kept Going
however the Workers we're not
discouraged and started the present
baseball season in earnest and with
''re III their eyes. The team was
composed OF veteran battery in
scott and Schroeder but, for the
most part, the rest OF the team was
green and inexperienced. Heart.
ened by the wonderful tWirlinp ~
=. iiiii'dlES pldylnR SenS1.
uonat oail throughout the season
ana gave the pitcher great support
mat was little short of big league
playing. In the beginning Of the
season the fans were wont ia AK
press the thought that the Workers
were playing over their heads but
as the season wore on and the tea m
continued its mad dash for the PEN
nant the fans began to sit up and
axe notrce. The first game between
tne workers and Corbins, last years
champions. drew a wonderful crowd |
'nis game was a real test for the |
workers and. Corbins. like MANY
other teams fell before the on
slaught Of the Workers bats. The
Lake street aggregation won ten
straight games before the American
Paper Goods nine finally checking
the winning streak. .
The second game. with Corbins
proved easy for the future cham
plons and last Tuesday the Stanley
works team at last reached the goal
for which it had worked for many
years that Of winning = champion