davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1928-05-26
COULD THESE BE OUR RELATIVES HARDLY.

HIs shows you gorilla family captured in Africa BY the
great hunter Carl 3 Akeley stuffed and mounted,
natural life Chicagos Field Museum Of Natural History
Reproduced by permission from tomorrows Washington
Sunday Herald this photograph gives all food for
thought what may think about Darwin and the
so-caled monkey theory
Father Gorilla powerful twolegged animal on earth
peaceful you don't attack him. he will let alone That
more than you say for Of his alleged descendants
with bigger brains and smaller mouths
Also this big gorilla is FAITHFUL husband. Once
mated he interests himself in female gorilla except his
OWN.
That also is more than you say for other two
legged creatures
The learned editor of the Sunday Herald speaks Of this
family Of gorillas as nearest animal relative YCu
will read about that in The Washington Herald tomorrow but
it is all matter Of opinion.
scientific theory that three of the biggest most
intelligent monkeys the ancestors Of three great divisions
Of the human
You ought to read about that in little book called The
Mongol In Our Midst by r. G. Crookshank published by
E. r Dutton and Company.
According to that book well supported by scientific facts
the gorilla is the ancestor the AFRICAN race the orang
outang is the ancestor the MoNGoLIAN including
Chinese the chmpanzee is the ancestor Of WHITE
race.
Incidentally that might explain cOmpanOnate marriage
ideas The chmpanzee said to be the least moral least
well behaved Of all the higher races of monkeys
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1928-05-26
By Elsie Robinson

with common pleasures.
1t will sometimes make you
ridiculous-people will say you're
queer. 1t will always make you
restless and lonely and a little
miserable. But it will be worth
it!
NO MATTER WHAT IT
COSTS, II IS A GREAT THING
TO HAVE A BRAIN.
And sometimes. when you're
weary of thinking. and discour'
aged because thinking doesn't get
YOU anywhere-rememb this,
AL. You are really not alone, al
you may seem to be. You are
part of a great company who
have suffered and sought as you
are doing, and you are carrying
on their work.
They are the ones who have
led humanity down out of trees
and caves and up out of holes.
They did the thinking for the
litter, and they had hard time
doing it. They did not know
happiness, either, but they knew
pride. And even when they were
roasting at stakes or dying on
crosses, as they often did, am
sure they were willing to pay
the price for the power to think.
So 60 on thinking, son. Don t
let them laugh or scare you out
of it. And don't finch from pay
ing the price. Good things come
high.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1928-05-26
Hide Your Savings in q Local
Bank and Profit Thereby

GAIN We have Of aged man hiding his lifetime
savings around his home to find that robbers have
taken III
hardly possible that men women sensible enough
20 accumulate savings for old ages necessities would IN these
modern days. resort to this practice Of hiding money q
valuables ii or around their homes
Persons guilty Of this foOlshness invite both robbery and
murder and deprvng themselves Of the income which
TIE money would bring invested deposited ii bank
There might be in places remote from banks
especially boarding small before going to banks
but in city like Washington where the banks are safe
and easily reached, there are no excuses
The safest place to hide money Is in bank, where
viii draw interest and yield profits Washington banking
institutions are under control Of the Comptroller Of the Cur
rency, and sound.
Even more profitable than interest deposits invest
ent in substantial securities Listen not to the fellow who
win sell you stock other security that promises Tor
tune but consult the officer Of any well known
Washington bank investment house and he will advise you
TO purchasing bonds stocks that safe United
states bonds Invest these and put them in safe deposit
yaut secure from thieves, Then having nothing to
worry about
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1928-05-26
Senate Should Remain On
Job Until It Passes Boulder
Dam Bill

HE House has pass resolution Of adjourn
ment It has transacted the nation legislative business
II orderly and efficient II has done the job It was
sent to Washington TO do
The Senate has SO home until it likewise mas
finished its work still has to act upon half dozen
measures Of national importance which have already passed
The House. including the naval construction Dill ana Inc
Boulder Dam bill 80.
The naval construction bill opposed By the rapid paCss
who think stop spending money Tor national DEFENSE
IT win aid their pursuit world peace schemes The Secretary
State fortunately denies the charge that ne y n sympathy
with the plot to sink the navy bill
Boulder Dam fought by such conglomeraon Of goody
coode Int hv the most powerful richest and besOTganzed
lobby that Congress has ever It's $4,000 super
Josiah Newcomb sits in the Senate gallery waiting W
send The triumphant telegram to his electcpower clients:
sssenate adjourned today: vote on Boulder Dam
Every Senator who votes for adjournment before the
countrYg business done voting the lobby wants
him to vote If the Senate stays il will break the Boulder
session without the aid Of an adjournment date the
Senate breaks the fbuster and to vote on Boulder
Dam, The bill will pass.
Il the Senate 50 Coward subserven to the demands Of
this sinister lobby that daes not stay IA session ana vote
mon legislation of national Importance simply because that
legislation includes bill the power trust spending $4OOpOo
s members 81 the United States Senate when they do
leave Washington going back home What would
they offer for neang from the work set before tns
We think the Senate IS patriotic enough and independent
enough and enough to avoid inviting upon itself the
cOr and contempt Of honest We think the power lobby
VIII be disappointed. We think the Senate will stay here and
finish the job
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1928-05-26

writes AL. "It sure gets my
goat when l think about it. They
tell me this ought to be the
happiest time of my life, but I
don't see it. Do you suppose
there are really any happy peo-
pie in the world?"
Yes, AL, there are. But you'll
never be one of them.
IF YOU'RE SMART ENOUGH
YOU'LL NEVER BE ABLE TO
ENJOY 1T 100 PER CENT.
That's the price We pay for in.
telligeuce..
There are people who do enjoy
life. It's mysteries never worry
them--its cruelty never angers
them. They never think about
such things. They just think
about themselves. What they will
eat and what they will wear,
where they. will live, who they
will love and what make of car
they want.
If people like that have money
enough to buy what they want,
they are perfectly happy. They
are healthy animals, and if they
had to pass an intelligence test.
they'd probably have nothing
whatever on guinea pigs.
If happiness like that would
suit you, AL, you could find it.
But happiness like that will never
suit you, for you're not just a
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1928-05-26
MEDIT
OF "A WIFE
BY Helen Rowland

Mans Dangerous Moment
II ILITH was Adams first wife
and he appears to have been
perfectly content with her, until.
he discovered that she had no
SOUL
This is what 20 many men dis
cover, along about 40 or rs, when
they have made their fortunes, are
able to afford two automobiles, and
are not yet ready to take up golf
as a life work.
Usually, the discovery that
wife has mo soul" comes about
the time that her ankles are be-
ginning 10 get little thick. and
she develops the first worry
wrinkles around the eyes.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1928-05-26
SECRETS OF
HEALTH
by DE-. @. a. =. Reed-

UTHILE on recent trip around
wv the world I confirmed by
personal inquiry what ! had prev
iously known by hearsay, that the
hotter the country the hotter the
food. BY this ! mean that in
all hot countries the people
native to those countries eat hot
food made hotter by condiments.
There is q sound physiological
reason, a reason in natural law,
for this phenomenon. 1t is simply
one of natures means Of adjust
ment to environment.
Condiments, consisting of varl.
Gus spices and aromatics. are
used all over the world. This
fact stands out as a protest
against that particular form Of
fadism that decries the use of all
condiments. If these taste-giving
preparations were the injurious
things they are sometimes de-
picted to be, it could be said with
accuracy that the entire human
race is engaged in a serious effort
at suicide.
Taken by and large, It may be
said that usage, however empiri-
cal, will he found to have scien-
tific Justification when reduced to
the last analysis. 1t follows, there
fore that use, but not abuse, may
be taken as a reasonably safe cri-
terion for daily experience. This
is especially true of condiments.
Our most common condiInent
is salt. Ordinary table salt con-
sists of two elements, chlorine and
sodium, both of which are essen
tial constituents of the human
body. 1t is all nonsense. there
fore, to say that one may not
eat salt, the common experience
of mankind crying out to the con-
trary. This, however. is no IL
cense for the abuse of salt which,
like practically every other food
element, may become damaging
through excess.
Pepper is probably the next
most widely used condiment in
temperate countries. BY this l
mean the ordinary black pepper.
1t is also used in the tropical
countries where, however, the
hotter peppers, represented by
cayenne and tabasco, are in more
general demand.
Some of these hotter peppers
enter into the composition of the
various curries of which, how
ever, ginger is the leading con-
stituent. | had always thought
that curry was a certain definite
product. When visited India,
however, I found that curry
varied with the cities, even with
the hotels, where stopped.
was told in explanation, that each
locality had a particular pride in
it's special formula for curry. In
some the stuff was so hot as to
burn ones mouth and throat. In
others it was simply a very pleas.
ant gingery and peppery flavor
for otherwise tasteless rice or I'M
duly high.flavored mutton.
Now the physiological meaning
of all this is that, in hot climates
and in our own heat Of summer,
the appetite tends to diminish.
We are prone then to feel but
little hunger. 1t is then that
these condiments. together with
various savory herbs - such as
parsley, chives, garlic, onions,
capers and bay-leaves--are neces'
sary as indictments to keep our
nutrition up to par.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1928-05-26
ONCE-OVERS
Stop. Patting Yourself On The Back

Stop. Patting Yourself On The Back
faults others, magnyng
show yourself far own faults
areco concerned.
Do you think you have faults than other people?
things about others that don't like and you
criticize freely particularly in family.
the members family do retaate it not an
nothing of which to complain
children dare criticize husband wife
refrain referring faults because they know there
would be a
But likely have annoying those of which
complain.
usually who have the to say
drogae about others the most dsageeabs traits
themselves.
You not exception the general rule.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1928-05-26
''Swatting" the President Who
Didn't Choose" to Run
T9REsmENT COOLIDGE didn't "choose" to run again,

T0RESlDENT COOLIDGE didn't choose 10 run again. ana
50 Congress passes four five bills his vetoes
How many of these bills if any would have been passed
over his if he had decided to be candidate for Pres
dent again7
vayg amused at Congress asserting its independence OF
the White House time the occupant about to 60 out
and be succeeded by someone else.
Somebody should compile history Of bills passed over
redsntiai yeoes and will show that this has happened
seldom when President in the prime OF power in the
White House. backed by Congress Of his own faith and
rain to be his parys leader in presidential election
n is the old human story Of running over the man who
is getting down and out Wolves follow the same
practices. ~
This Congress isn't exactly hostile to President Coolidge
members do not overflow with love for him. They do
him and his abilities, does the whole country 30
: ut of office he is Congress "swats him few
49, go Is demonstrate its Independence"
~ gCooldge may hold grudges, but he has long
eno9y and isn't wholly out Of the political game by any
means.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1928-05-26
A CHINESE WOMAN FIGHTER

CHINAS civil enlisting to fight as well as
~
This lady belonging to the Kuominang party trained by
Russians believe in Boshevsm belongs Russia female
ntelgentsia She has fountain pen in her upper left
hand pocket will notice And she is putting
matte pistol holster she has lust finished
shooting somebody has been examining the weapon
known.
In any case hard working American would prefer lady
with powder puff to this lady with the puff of powder.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1928-05-26

There appears to be no way of
''hog-tying" a husband. Putting
him on leash, labelling him
sold" or making him wear a
wedding ring would only make
him more tempting, like the do
not handle" sign on the things
in the shops.
Homemade biscuits and hot
dumplings used to be guarantee
of any husbands devotion. But
flour.and.water paste no longer
appears to stand chance against
lip rouge and applesauce, after a
mans soul" begins working.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1928-05-26
LISTEN, WORLD!

healthy animal
-y o u n e a.
healthy animal
PLUS a brain.
and you must
pay a heavy
price for that
brain.
All your life
it will be a rest
less spirit. twist
ing back and
forth 81 d g
your skull. 1t
will help you
to see more
b e a ty than
sluggish m e n
can ever see,
but 1t will also
make you see
more ugliness.
1t will satisfy
you with great
rewards-but it
will also make
un,1 di1ca ffGfi06
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1928-05-26

al LIS one OF
II those gawky,
quiet youngsters
OF 10 who sit
around trying
to figure things
out. You don't
hear much OF
such youngsters,
with all this
huIlabaloo about
Flaming Youth.
but the woods
are full ofthenn.
w ordering what
It's all about.
Why things are
such a mess
why peopl q
can't get to-.
& g t h er and
st raig hit en-
things OUT
Life is sure
a funny thing,
isn't it. Miss
r nh N p
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1928-05-26

EVERY library should try to be
complete on something IL it were
only the history of pinheads.--
Holmes.
An idea, like q ghost accord
ing to the common notion Of
shost). must be spoken 70 . little
before ii will explain itself.
Dickens.
& II the true spark Of religious
and civil liberty be kindled, 1t
The world has not yet learned
che riches Of frugality. Cicero.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1928-05-26
WORDS FROM LIPS OF WISE MEN

Learn from the birds what food
the thicket yields;
Learn from the beasts the physic
of the field;
The arts of building from the
bee receive;
Learn of the mole to plough. the
worm to weave.-Pope.
Words are but holy as the
deeds they cover Shelley.
He conquers twice who con.
quers himself in victory.-Eyrus.
History IL the complement Of
poetry. stephens.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1928-05-26

1unlEing the old wife for some
thing new and flashy with all the
modern improvements, is getting
to be almost popular custom in
these days of painless divorce,
youth culture and sentimental rest
lessness.
In nine cases out Of 10, the soul
mate turns out to be far longer on
dimples, knees, silk hosiery and
lipstick than or SOUL. But 1t
doesn't take much to convince p
man who is bored with domesticity
and tired of coffee kisses. that you
and he are mated In the luminous
void"
When wife after 10 or 20
years of walking the baby, getting
the children off to school and put.
ting mustard plasters on her hus"
band) begins to get just a little
harder on the eyes. she Is apt to
: be a little harder on the nerves,
too. And almost any fresh, virile,
young thing who knows how to
GO alphabetically into a mans
ear can make him believe that he is
misunderstood" and that there Is
something lacking" in his life.
Once upon a time, A married
man was considered his wife
sacred property. But. now, the
world seems to be full of love-
poachers and sentimental high
waywomen, who have no regard
for any woman's property rights.
The Washington times., 1928-05-23
WIFE No. | WINS
DIVORCE SUIT

Mrs. Grace RI Keleher Of the
1900 block Quincy ST, who sued
her husband. John Robert Keleher
for an absolute divorce after he
married Detroit woman, was
awarded an interlocutory decree
~ Justice Hitz In equity court
yesterday.
Through Attorneys Raymond Neus
decker and William G. Ashford, the
wife declared that she married the
defendant on October %. 1921. and
that he later deserted her. Later,
she declared. her husband told hes
that he had obtained q divorce, and
married Grace M McPheter IN
Detroit, February 12. 1927. When
she found that he had never Oh.
tanned i divorce from her Mrs.
KeIeher began her own action.
Keleler made no defense TO the
charges. and deposition offered
IN evidence showed that he had
lived with wife number two IN Will
lard Ohio. for several months fol-
lowing the alleged bigamous mar
riage in Detroit.
Although she was abandoned with
her fiye-year-0Id son, Mrs. Keleher
made no claim for alimony al
loWance.
The Washington times., 1928-05-23
Shoe Kings Daughter
To Be Welded in Paris

PARIS. May 20. Miss Muriel
Bliss, daughter Of Elmer Bliss. head
OF the Regal Shoe Company, and
Lieutenant Glasgow will be married
by civil ceremony tomorrow morn
ing at 10 O'Clock at the city hall of
the sixteenth reimbursement. The
brides father will BIZ her official
witness. American Consul George
orr will be the bridegroom's Of
fetal witness.
It Is understood the religious
ceremony will be held on Saturday
at the Chu-ch of Saint Pierre Chail-
I lot. Lieutenant Glasgow and his
bride are expected to reside in Los
Angeles.
The Washington times., 1928-05-23
Estheris
In Town!
ADVERTISEMENT

The women of this town who
crave a charming complexion are
greatly excited over the magic Lady
Esther Four-Purpose Face Cream on
sale at ell good drug stores and
toilet counters.
In less than three minutes. Lady
Esther cleanses and nourishes the
sl1in--it tightens f1abbiness and
makes an excellent base for your
powder and rouge. In one operation
1t does the work Of four individual
creams.
Moreover, it makes you ravish-
ingly beautiful, and your skin is as
smooth as velvet.
You want proof Here It il, Buy
4 SOC jar Of Lady Esther Four
Purpose Face Cream. Even after
the first application you'n notice
the wonderful Improvement In your
complexion. Soc 75c jars. Economy
size, s1.25.
The Washington times., 1928-05-23
Music Seen as Asset
To Religious Meetings

Music and other devotional helps
should attractiyely surround wor-
shin. the semi-annual meeting q
the washington Association OF Com
gregational churches agreed yes
terday. The value of prayer and Of
other outward signs in the develop.
nent OF q truly religious afmos-
pEere was stressed by several
speakers.
Delegates to the convention.
which was held in the First Con.
gregatfonai Church were enter
tanned at dinner in the church din
ing room by ladies of the church.
Arthur Deerin Call. secretary of the
American Peace Society, and Nor
decai W. johnson, president Of
Howard University, addressed the
diners.
The Washington times., 1928-05-23
Bandits Crack Jokes
As They Relieve
Man Of Cash

PHILADELPHIA. May 2s.-
Three bandits ioked while they
held up Roy Van Buren,, s.. in
lunch wagon and escaped with
s24 and a watch.
Come on now. fork over your
dough, or wen fill you fuller Of
holes than a pretzeI, said the
bandit leader as he stepped into
the lunch wagon and pointed a
gun at the face of Van Buren,,
who Is night manager.
While the leader covered Van
Buren, with his gun the other men
rifled the cash register and
searched the victims pockets. The
bandits. an said to have been
Well-dressed. escaped in an auto.
mobile.
The Washington times., 1928-05-23
GERMANY 8 Gas
DEATHS SHAKE
NATION
4 international New. Service

BERLIN, May 2s ALI GERMANY
has been shaken by the comment
following the poison gas explosion
III Hamburg which killed Il persons
outright and put go others IN the
hospital. Many Of the asphixiated
victims are in such serious condi-
ton that it is believed they cannot
recover.
Pacific Socialist and democratic
papers are painting lurid pictures
81 the horrors of the next war
when fleets Of airpianes drop poison
gas bombs upon unsuspecting cities.
The Berliner Achfuhr Abendblatt
called ii a general rehearsal Tor
aero-chemical warfare Of the ~.
ture. The newspaper added:
ssThe terrible lesson the German
people will realize from this Is what
4 horrible fate awaits civilians when
the terrors OF future gas warfare
break upon them unexpectedly.
The Washington times., 1928-05-23

Hy HIS is our party 8. come and enjC
yourself at the great modern dayligl
Everything FREE. All you can drink Sol
venirs. Music. A good time for everybod
Tell your friends bring the family and don
forget the date and time
Special Notice to Beverage Dealers
EXTRA-FTday, May IS, from 10 A M. to
10 r. Nj, a special reception for dealers only.
Luncheon. Refreshments, and Music. All dealers
invite and assured of good time.
The Washington times., 1928-05-23
Coolidge Delays Action
On McNary-H augen Bill

President Coolidge has not yet
taken any action on the McNary.
Hangen farm relief bill, which has
been on his desk since last week.
but he again intimated to callers
Yesterday that he will veto It.
Concerning reports that he might
veto it with an admonition to
Congress that he would sign 1t with
the equalization fee eliminated
brought only the response YESTERDAY
that the President would be willing
n sign any bill not out Of line
with his previous recommendations
10 Congress.
The Washington times., 1928-05-23
Want Bridge Named
For COIored Leader

A resolution to name the proposed
bridge across Rock Greek at "A
Street after the late Col. Charles
Young. negro West Pointer, who
served with the principal negro
troops Of the Regular Army. anil
who organized and developed native
conssabulary forces in Haiti and
Liberia. was introduced at a meet
ing of the Georgetown Civic Asso.
citation, In the Phillips School Build
ing. last night.
After 4 short business meeting,
members were treated to an enter
tainment program.
Evening star., 1928-09-09

GENTLEMANS HOME.
Nearby Md-Large seven-room pebble
dash house: bath, electricity, city water; one
acre ground; near concrete road and bus
line s35 month. Owner, Franklin BIAS or
Hyatts. 1045-W.
Evening star., 1928-09-09

8 ACRES. WITH 9-ROoM HOUSE. CLOSE
20 Baltimore Pike aMd nd r; l. eXten1sion XXI 1sa sa
Mas. J. A. DORSEY. "a Banner ST., HyattS-
vile MD Tel Nv 526-J.
Evening star., 1928-09-09

bUNGALows FOR RENT OR sALE-Lo77 O.
Defense Highway: rooms and bath, elec,
tricity. furnace; lsrse Eardens; near sen91l nq1
and church; small rent. Owner, RlGtrLI
al
Evening star., 1928-09-09
HOMES OF REAL VALUE.

S725O-2- Foot Front Brick Home,
NORTHWEST-VERY EASY TERMS.
arranSe NTH sIy
$685. Comparatively New Brick House
NEAR 4th AND SPRING ROAD
A attact or
is n Convenient arranged
ST 50O-A Charming Home on Large Lot
IN BEAUTIFUL BATTERY PARK
corner
and tie
h hOqssty mst mGasrn 5 h 9een sp sf sd ana
ou a any
S1275O-An attractive Detached Home
IN CHEVY CHASE, MD
bath a popular section oi
side eo n ef ce
S163O0-~ New Detached Brick Home
WELL LOCATED IN CHEVY CHASE.
A IN high-ass homes IN
c. o
front no ssep lee b ESSn fs vs @
FOR FURTHER EVENING
SHANNON & LUCHS INC,
Realtors.
t425K St NV Main 2345