davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Hyder weekly herald., 1928-05-12

A resident of Dawson re- gently bought a house in that city for $100 and had his in- vestment paid within $1.9O a few hours after moving in, when he found $98.1O under meath the old carpets. In relay in g a strip of linoleum he found that he could not make it lie flat. Reaching under the linoleum to remove the ob- stacle, he pulled forth four $20 bills, one $1O bill and a 10 cent coin, all wrapped together. Further inspection of other corners of the building result ed in the disclosure of a $5 bill and three $1 bills.
Hyder weekly herald., 1928-05-12

He had just been appointed judge, and it was his first day on the bench. His first case was bootlegger. A little uncertain as to what penalty to inflict, he excused himself a minute, went outside, and called an old judge aside.
 o, judge he said. "I've got bootlegger out there and don't know what to give him. ''
 The old man replied-Don't give him over $4. I never do."- Alaska Legionaire.
Hyder weekly herald., 1928-05-12
Just for Fun

Silence isn't golden, it is plat mum.
 Your ship can't come in un- less you ship goes out.
 Too much money is bad for you--if someone else has it.
 A quack gets your money and ducks.
 Mary had a little dress,
 A dainty bit and airy; It didn't show the dirt a bit, But gosh, how it showed Mary! Save The Surface-Save All
 Is it true that statistics prove women live longer than men?
 We'll, you know paint is a great preservative.
 Americanism: Trying to get rich enough to afford an open fireplace like the poorest cab ins have.
 Pleasant thoughts and a cold refuse to dwell together in the same head.
 Most wives, to whom their husbands seem only half a man might find some young flap
Hyder weekly herald., 1928-05-12
NOTICE TO ADVERTISERS
EXPLODING A MYTH.

The so-called summer slump" is the hallucination of an un- businesslike mind. Experience has shown that "there ain't no sich animal" except in imagi- nation. The only slump in busi- ness, if such there be, is the natural slump when business allows it's summer advertising to slump.
 As a mater in fact, there are abundant businesses that ef- feet their greatest volume of sales during the warm months i; and there are no business in creases that are not reflected in increases for other business.
 The myth of the summer slump dates back to those dark ages when business was hit Or-miss proposition. Silly super stitions and foolish fears so held it in leash that progress was slow and difficult. One of the superstitions which none dared smash was the belief that business was permanently alienated from hot weather and nothing could reconcile them. Finally some daring pio- neer broke the evil spell by in- creasing his advertising and all but few reactionaries have been enjoying summer pros perity ever since. It was one of the earliest miracles of adver- Using.
 No longer does progressive, wide-awake business curtail it's advertising with the arrival of the first hot spell. Instead, it stocks up with summer goods and gives them an equa, chance with fall, winter and spring stocks by advertising them as heavily.
 Even the coal dealer has prov. ed the summer slump a base. less legend. He advertises ? price concession for summer coal orders and keeps hi; trucks busy filling coal bin. cellars f or the distant winter If the coal man can keep busy in hot weather, there is no ex cuse for other business te spend the summer dustine boxes, swatting flies and fig
Hyder weekly herald., 1928-05-12
THINGS THAT
 CANT BE DONE" ,"


 The world has always been n need of men to do the things that could not be done. The leed is more pressing today han ever.
 When Columbus started out Q sail around the globe men aughed at him and told him it 'ould not be done. Columbus lid not succeed in the attempt, t is true, but he proved that he thing could be done.
 When Samuel Morse started 0 transmit messages between
Hyder weekly herald., 1928-05-12

Great men all say they got their source of inspiration at mothers knee. We'll, the mod ern generation certainly ought to get an eye full, for the source of that inspiration is certainly much more visible now than ever before.
Hyder weekly herald., 1928-05-12

A recent example of tact by the Concordia, Kansas Blade Empire is worth passing on for the aid and comfort of the journalistic fraternity at large. In apologizing for mentioning the age of a bride as 39 instead of 29, the Blade says the trans gression might just as easily have been the other way as the bride looked nineteen.
Hyder weekly herald., 1928-05-12

The bashful young man was taking a young girl to supper. While seated cozily at the table on the porch of the country inn, she said: "Oh Harold, did you hear the chimney swallow?"
 "That wasn't the chimney" 5aid Harold, blushing, "that was me-"
Hyder weekly herald., 1928-05-12

The modern girl may have more pep and vivacity, as claimed, but no one has been able to figure out a way to har- ness any of it to a cook stove or wash tub.
Hyder weekly herald., 1928-05-12

A Yale player was teaching some cowboys how to play football. He explained the rules and ended as follows: Remember, fellows, if you can't kick the ball, kick a man on the other side. Now let's get busy. Where's the ball?"
 One of the cowboys shouted : Never mind the ball! Let's start the game. ."-Ex.
Hyder weekly herald., 1928-05-12

Principal: "Son, what does this 60 on your report card mean?"
 Son: 'I don't know, man, maybe it's the temperature of the room."
Hyder weekly herald., 1928-05-12

"Haycraft was almost drown ed last night"
 "No, how come?"
 "The pillow slipped, the bed spread and he fell in the spring"
Hyder weekly herald., 1928-05-12

We wonder if the middle-aged women feel any younger after their hair has been bobbed, say, a couple of years.
Hyder weekly herald., 1928-05-12

If the modern miss would lose one hand of strip poker she would look like a true daugh- ter of Eve.
Hyder weekly herald., 1928-05-12

Teacher was giving a lesson on bird lore to Mollie. "There are many kinds of birds, spar rows, robins, swallows, black birds, crows, etc."
 Dad says you are like a crow, miss," interrupted Molly importantly.
 "A crow, I don't think so, Mollie," was the indignant re- ply.
 Please teacher, father didn't say a common crow" answer ed Mollie eager to vindicate her father. Dad said you were a scarecrow, miss"
Hyder weekly herald., 1928-05-12

Bad luck is usually cussed for bad luck, while good luck is usually taken for granted.
Hyder weekly herald., 1928-05-12

Another place the eternal tri- angle is present is in an orches- tra.
Hyder weekly herald., 1928-05-12

per in possession of the other half.
Hyder weekly herald., 1928-05-12

Its a frank age: Open cove nants, open plumbing, short skirts, courtship without turn ing the lights down.
New Britain herald., 1928-09-07
EGG BARRAGE IS
signal TO STOP
And-Smih Speakers Get Rough
Reception in Alabama

Fort Payne, Ala. Sept. 7.-A-
The second North Alabama anti
Smith meeting within three days to
be thus interrupted. adjourned last
night in confusion amid barrage of
eggs.
An addition Of oranges to the sup
ply of eggs and q fist fight served to
enliven the proceedings.
-Four deputy sheriffs managed to
restore order at the meeting after
escorting Henry Price, candidate for
alderman. to his home. Price is said
to have struck Raleigh Monroe. son
of q prominent merchant, when
Monroe cheered for Smith. Monroe.
with an injured eye. was the only
reported casualty.
r. H. Pegues, of Jackson county
was speaking at the time the first
egg was thrown. 1t struck the wall
over his shoulder and Pegues retired
Immediately.
DR.. John r. Turner. presiding eld-
err of the Albertyille district Metho-
dist Episcopal church, the next
speaker. brought forth the main at
tack by Smith supporters when he
asserted that ''prohibitionists should
vote for Hoover" Cheers for Smith
drowned his voice and he was pre-
vented from completing his address
by a shower Of eggs and oranges.
On Tuesday night Rev. George w.
Wilburn, of Little Rock, Ark, was
the target for egg tossers when he
delivered an anti-Smith speech at 4
meeting in Florence. The Rev. Mr..
Wilburn was able to finish his ad-
| dress, however.
New Britain herald., 1928-09-07
ware TO REMAIN
AS Penn. LEADER
Optimistic Reports Received Re.
6arding His Health

Philadelphia, Sept. Pl-Optimis-
tic reports concerning the condition
of Senator Elect William S. Ware, i'll
at his Atlantic City home. welc
made last night by James NJ.
Hazlett, recorder OF deeds and
chairman of the republican city
committee, on his return here after
a brief visit to the stricken leader.
Mr.. Hazlett, one of the most IN
innate friends of the senator-elect,
was permitted by DR.. Elwood r..
Kirby, physician in charge, to pay a
five minute visit to MIR. Ware today.
The city chairman said he had, not
talked politics with Ware but de-
clared that Mr.. Ware was not con-
sidering relinquishing the Philadcl-
phia leadership and that neither
Mayor Mackey nor any other person
was contemplating taking his place.
Il was surprised by the improved
condition in which found the
senator" said Mr.. Hazlett. HE
New Britain herald., 1928-09-07
life SAVING SHOW
AT !. v. {. A. POOL


Monday. September 10. ct 1880 p.
m. the 7. W. G. 4. swimming peol
will reopen for the winter with .
Red Cross life saving exhibition for
the public The pool was closed dur
ing August for complete renovation
and . new coat Of paint. New Brit
ain can now boast of one of the best
Y. W. G. A. pools in the country.
Tho participants in the swimming
exhibition are all New Britain girls
who. have learned life saving in the
Y. W. G. A. pool and have passed
the Red Cross life saving examina-
tons making them registered life
savers who are capable Of giving as
sistance in any drowning emergency
case. These girls know the water and
are AZ much at home under the wa
ter a. on the surface. This winter
the Life Saving club will continue its
activities by a monthly meeting in
which they will keep in practice to
be ready for summer accidents II
necessary.
The Red Cross exhibition on Mon
day night will consist of Red Cross.
breaks carries, strangle holds, div
Ing, stunts and games.
Members Of the Life Saving club
are as follows: Esther Beckwith.
Alice Beh. Sophie Ginsberg. Mary
Hart, Olive Keller, Myrtle Keller.
Mildred Hooper. Bella Levitt. Eliza
beth Macintosh. Irene McNulty.
Isabelle McNulty, Gertrude Middle
ton Katherine Molchan. Emma Os-
perg, Julia Pilkonis. Agnes Stnskle'
Dorothy Thompson, Gertrure Fieber'
Katharyn Tormay. Ruth Wacker'
Olive Walsh. Virginia Warner. Es-
Their Westman. Irene Winger. Anna
Narkevch, Emily Cieszynski. katn-
crime McGrath. Frieda Glaeser.
Mildred Keimowitz. Helen smed-
berg, Jeanenne seman. Catherine
yolx. Mary volz, Anna Marley. Ruth
Reynolds Ethel Barrett. Edith ticn-
nan, Marguerite Hubert Evelyn
Keller. Gladys Leavitt Barbara
smith, Harriet sprague. Betty Wei
ant, Winifred Fodt, Gladys Manson
mildred Manson Lassie Urban.
Miss Gertrude Fossett Is physica'
director.
New Britain herald., 1928-09-07
) M1ERSECTlONAL GAMES

O0Gx0W &A44D3ssssSSS esssss~ A'~~s " -
FAN 70 the Yankee stadiua In
Football This Fall
New York. Sept. I (UP)-Five
intersectional intercollegiate football
games are to be played 1T the Yam
kee stadium this season. according
to announcement by Ed Barrow.
business manager and secretary Of
the New York Yankees.
The Army eleven will appear
twice at the stadium. New York
university will play six games and
Fordham two. This u the fourth
season that Knute Rockne's fight
ing Irish eleven will oppose the
Army team at the stadium.
The complete schedule A. ar
ranged by Football Director Ray
Mccarthy follows:
October IL. Fordham We. New
York university.
October 20. Rutgers W. New York
university.
October 81, Colgate We. New York
university.
November ). New York univer-
sity VI. Georgetown.
November 6. (election day. West
Virginia W. Fordham.
November 10. Notre Dame VS.
Army.
November II, Missouri Va. New
York university.
November 20. Thanksgiving day.
Oregon Aggies VS.. New York univer-
sity. y
December I. Leland Stanford vs.
Army.
New Britain herald., 1928-09-07
Less Than 10000
Enroll in Philadelphia

Philadelphia. Sept. I R1Less
than 100000 persons enrolled In
Philadelphia yesterday for the No
vember election. George ]. Brennan.
chairman OF the registration COM
mission estimated last night after
the closing of the books at II p. m.
Rain was responsible for the small
turnout. This was the first OF three
registration days.
On the first registration day last
year when there was a mayoralty
fight in progress 1S4,S54 persons en-
New Britain herald., 1928-09-07
MAPLE HILL NEWS

Miss Jean Monier. daughter OF Mr.
ana Mrs. Theodore Monier OF ROD
bins avenue, has returned nolie
after spending the summer WITH
relatives in the Adirondacks.
Mr.. and Mrs. D. X. Perry and
children of Golf street are on mo-
tor trip to Binghamton and Niagara
Fails, N. 7.
Mias Constance Grant Of Coli
street was 4 guest Of Miss Dorothy
Comstock Of somers last weekend
Mrs, J, r. Hart and family OF
Thompson street have returned from
Madison whore they spent the sum-
msr.
Mr.. and Mrs. N. B. Hurd Of Golf
stteet spent last weekend In Shell
burne Falls, Mass. visiting their son.
Harry Hurd.
Mrs. W. J. Sorrow and family OF
Seuuin street returned Monday from
their cottage at Canoe Harbor. East
River.
Miss Gertrude Fieber Of Frederick
street returned Monday after spend
int the weekend in Philadelphia.
Mics Elsie Fieber who has been
visiting relatives there all summer
returned with her sister.
Mrs. william Middlemas and fam.
New Britain herald., 1928-09-07

talked lucidiy and clearly. and APP
peared to be cheerful.
II cannot. of course. tell how
long it will take for Mr. Ware to
recover his health, but my OBJ
servation encourages ME to believe
that he will ultimately be cured.
Recovery in cases Of that kind is
slow, but ! am sure he will recover.
New Britain herald., 1928-09-07
Men Crash; Arrested
For Stealing the Plane

New York. Sept. R-Two men
who were injured yesterday when
their airplane crashed in landing at
Miller field, Staten Island, were ar
rested last night In the hospital
where they are recovering, charged
with stealing the plane.
They are Anatol Renner, of New
York. the pilot, and Louis Mattold.
of Lakehurst, N. j., his passenger.
The complaint was made by George
w. Wilson. owner OF the plane. who
said he had discharged Renner as
his pilot yesterday.
New Britain herald., 1928-09-07
HORSES BURNED

London, Sept. Z R-Princess May
Rotay mourned the death OF six
valuable race horses, burned to
death at Goldsborough Hall, the
Yorkshire home of the Princess and
Viscount Lascelles.
The flames. which broke out last
night, were prevented from spread
ing to the royal residence from the
stables. The princess was in the
residence at the ii. e.
New Britain herald., 1928-09-07

rolled and on the first day In 1924.
with a presidential campaign. the
total was 130,9S5.
Mr.. Brennan said there was a
larger percentage of women regis
tered yesterday than usual. No fraud
was reported to the registration
commission and there was no dis
order in any Of the 1900 divisions.
New Britain herald., 1928-09-07
All Chicago Pupils Get
Chance to Study Music

Chicago. Sept. R-Music VIII
take a front seat in Chicago school
rooms this fall, nudging arithmetic
out of part of the bench.
Every pupils in the public schools
will be given an opportunity to learn
to play the piano. announces supt,
William J. Began.
Il feel that it is more important
10 child to learn something Of mu-
sic than it is to learn arithmetic"
Mr.. Began says.
New Britain herald., 1928-09-07

$4,000 persons restslsss6 = III cry
wards. It was Ls'isvs1, ~. ths&
unfavorabie weather ksDe mAEy ~.
sons from the bsoshs. .tcp>sts fsesa
several western Pennsylran:s cosA-
ties also Indicated that registration
had been heavy.
New Britain herald., 1928-09-07

hams Vegetable Compound and about
the same in tablet form. This is one
medicine Z woman should have in
the house all the time. l am improv-
ing every day and I sure am able to
eat. I am willing to answer any let
ters asking about the Vegetable COM
pound. "-MRs. ELLA RICHARDS, 81
Chautauqua st., N. S. Pittsburgh, Pa.
New Britain herald., 1928-09-07

Sick or otherwise, Mr.. Ware u the
leader of the republican party and
will remain So"
New Britain herald., 1928-09-07
RECORDS FALL

Pittsburgh. Scrt. W-All pre-
vious first day election registration
! records were said to lave been
broken here yesterday when almost
New Britain herald., 1928-09-07

sluggish feelings
and I could not
eat. l was losing
in weight. / read
so much about
Lydia E. Pink
hams Vegetable
Compound and
what . good med
icine 1t is, that I
started taking it.
/ have taken
eight bottles of
Lydia E. Pink
New Britain herald., 1928-09-07

lily OF Colt street have returned
from Brighton Beach. Black Hall
where they spent the summer.
Mrs. II. Nordstrom, Albert Morris
and Clarence Nordstrom Of Robbins
avenue have returned from Black
Hall, Mantle.
New Britain herald., 1928-09-07
READ HERALD CLASSIFIED ADS
ALWAYS KEEPS
It on HAND
Lydia E. lnkhazn's Vegetable
COMPOUND HELPS Her So Mach

Pittsburgh, PAT was just com
pletely rundown. had tired, heavy,
New Britain herald., 1928-09-07

READ HERALD CLASSIFIED ans
New Britain herald., 1928-09-07

Grants prepared paint gives
a lustrous lasting surface
and covers extremely well,
proving its superior quality.
Because it is made for ~
in enormous quantities We
can sell it at this low price.
Put up in all colors. for m
side or outside work.
New Britain herald., 1928-09-07

Mrs. william Middlemas and fam.
New Britain herald., 1928-09-07
Collars

Sturdy, compact wise,
with h eavy, perfectly
aligned jaws and strong
grip. Exceptional value
1t = dollar.
Evening star., 1928-04-03

$40 pm.-Dance program by the
Georgetown Collegiates.
0:1O pm.-"What the Scientist Finds
In a Glass of Milk" by Herbert e. Nor
gan of the Civil Service Commission.
9:25 p.n.--Prof. Eugene s. Costa,
mandolinist
9:40 p.m.-Carl Caul, baritone.
9;55 p.m.-*Facts and Follies OF the
Theater," by Colby Hartman.
1915 p.m.-News flashes.
1880 to 1880 p.m.-Radio Movie
Club, featuring musical revue, Hey,
Hey!"
Evening star., 1928-04-03
MAGNATE is MUSICIAN.
German Industriaiist Wields Baton
Over Big Orchestra.

Correspondence Of tie Associated Press.
BERLIS.-It is not every day that q
big lndustrasliSt yfelcG the baton over q
symphony orchestra
Werner Won Clemens, one Of the chief
stockholders IN the gigantic Clemens a.
Ealske works. manufacturers OF electri-
ca goods and machinery. gave a concert
sf his home al which he conducted the
philharmonic orchestra Of nearly 100
pieces through classical program such
as ordinarily only Furtwaeneler or
Bruno Walter will touch.
Some 400 guests were present at the
concert, which was given In the capa-
ciols Eienaens Ehsteau IAnkwftz, near
Berlin. The audience included many Of
the diplomats accredited 10 the Wilhelm
strasse, leading induEtrialists and bank
ers, and men ano women prominent In
Berlin society
Evening star., 1928-04-03

WMAL--Washington Radio Forum
Gals Meters-1,24O Kilocycles).
6:55 p.m.-Thirty Club meeting, with
news flashes.
7:15 pm.-Dance program by The
Novelties.
7:45 p.m.-"Growing Vegetables to
Meet q Growing Demand" by F. w.
Geise of the University Of Maryland.
8pm.-Ambrose Durkin. baritone.
$40 pm.-Laure Beauregard Dia-
mond, contralto.
Evening star., 1928-04-03
WAR STOCKS STILL SOLD.
American Army Goods Left in
France Remain on Sale.

Correspondence OF the Associated Press.
PARIS.-"Stocks Americans" every
thing from shirts to shovels, left here
by the American Army, are still on sale,
nearly ten years after the war.
For years there were hundreds Of
stores in France where thousands OF
different Amercina Army articles we're
sold and there are many places in Paris
and provincial cities where they can
still be bought.
France paid 100000 900 for the
Army supplies. but for many reasons
she got back only about half the money
stores.
Evening star., 1928-04-03
Convict Base Ball
Team Barred From
Philippine League

By Radio 10 The star and CHICAGO Dali,
News. Copyright. 1928.
MANILA, April 3.--Gov. Gen.
Henry l.. Stimson struck queer
blow at amateur sports yesterday In
denying Bilibid prisoners the privi-
lege of entering a team In the anna
teur base ball league. or playing base
ball outside of the prison grounds,
saying they haven't entered prison
to play base ball or other games"
The Philippines have an advanced
prison system and the prisoners en-
Joy many privileges. but league base
ball would have been an innovation.
Evening star., 1928-04-03
WRC--Radio Corporation Of America
(468.5 MeterS-64O KilOcYclesl.

WRC--Radio Corporation Of America
(468.5 Meters--640 Kilocycles).
$3.50 pm.--Concert by the United
States Navy Band Orchestra.
4:30 pm.--The Tea Timers.
p.m.-Savoy-P Plaza tea music.
$50 p.m.-The Marionettes.
6 p.m.-Waldorf-A Astoria Orchestra.
$50 p.m.--Motion picture guide
6;35 pm.-Waldorf-A Astoria Orches-
ira.
pm.-Voters' service-"What Con-
gress Is Doing" by Charles G. Ross;
Democracy at Work" by J. Fred Es-
sary, president of the National Press
Club and correspondent Of the Balti-
more Sun.
7:30 pm.-Lotus Orchestra.
8pm.-W. B. & A. Entertainers.
$3.50 p.m.-Seiberling Singers.
9 pm.-Correct time.
9 p,m.-Eveready hour.
10 p.m.-Clicquot Eskimos.
1890 pm.-Weather forecast.
1890 to IL p.m.--Madrillon and
Spanish Village Orchestra.
Evening star., 1928-04-03
Plane Stops City's Phones.

Crashing into telephone pole while
landing their plane. students OF the
Auxiliary Air Force at Leuchars, Scot
land. training field. stopped telephone
service between Dundee and St. An
drews for an entire day recently. The
plane then turned around and crashed
into air force headquarters, causing a
wall OF the building to cave In. Flight
Lieuts. Money and Bromley were buried
underneath the wall and rendered un-
conscious. Flight Lieut.. Wimble. who
was plotting the machine was seriously
injured.
Evening star., 1928-04-03

TUESDAY. APRIL 3, 1928.
Programs prepared Scheduled
standard Meters hs call letters. hocyc right
Evening star., 1928-04-03
Men Beat Woman Inventors.

Men OF Great Britain are taking
greater interest in inventions white
women's activity in that direction Is
diminishing, according to the recent
government report. More than $4,000
applications for patents, trade marks or
designs were filed in the past year, an
increase OF II per cent over the pre-
ceding IL months. In spite Of the great
Total increase. there were TIT fewer ap-
pncations from woman inventors.
Evening star., 1928-04-03
Early Program Tomorrow.

GAS a.m.-Tower health exercises.
8 a.m.-Federation morning devo-
tions.
8'l5 a.m.-ParnaSsUs Trio.
$50 to $50 am.-Cheerio.
10 am.-Dr. Royal s. Copeland hour.
ii a.m-Studio program.
1l:l5 a.m.-Radio Household Insti-
tute.
1870 a.m.-Studio program.
IL noon-Noonday Lenten services.
! pm-Mayflower Orchestra.
p.m.-"Current Events" by A. D.
Rees.
2:l5 p.rn.-Parnassus Trio.
Evening star., 1928-04-03
Local Radio E Entertainment
Tuesday, April 8, 1928.
NAA--Vashington Navy Yard (434.5
Meters--60O KilOcycies).

NAA--Washington Navy Yard (434.5
Meters-690 Kilocycies).
3:45 pm.-Weather Bureau reports.
9:55 p.m.-Arlington time signals.
1905 p.m.--Weather Bureau reports.
WRHF--American Broadcasting Co.
1924 Meters--93O Kilocycles).
5:45 p.m.-The Town Crier.
6 to z p.m.-Dance program by
George SHADING and his Congress
sionalS.
Early Program Tomorrow.
Young.
1915 a.m.-Current history by Clara
McCuown.
10:30 a.m.--Mlsical program.
IL am.-Advertisers period.
1880 am. to IL noon-Learys half
hour of music.
Evening star., 1928-04-03

A radio receiver which Is tuned auto
matically by switches or buttons has
been designed by H. v. Marvin. wealthy
inventor OF Rye, N. Y, and early asso-
ciate Of Thomas A. Edison. BY merely
pressing lever or pulling down switch
a desired station Is brought In.