Evening star., 1928-09-14

Samuel Lover, 1797-is6s, was an Irish
the allesory entitled The White Trout.')
Pat could tell a tall tale when prop
erly urged and persuaded. A favorite
among those who knew him and liked
to listen to him was that about the
gridiron. which. Pat said. also Illustrated
the great stupidity of the French people.
1t ali began when Pat went on an
ocean voyage, and the ship foundered
and went down, and Pat was with the
Captain in an open boat, and their
provisions we're eXhausted-except for
pork-when. they fortunately sighted
land through the Captains bring en-
near" or spyglass. The land proved to
be France.
Il wish we had a gridiron." said Pat
then. and tells the rest of the story in
his own inimitable manner. as follows:
Why, them says the Captain,
thunder and turf, what puts gridiron
into your head?"
,, "Bekase BEL: I'm starvin' with the
And sure. bad luck to you" says he,
"you couldn't eat a gridiron."
"Ate a .gridiron," says 1. "Och, in
throth, I'm not such common as that,
anyhow. But sure. if we had gridiron,
we could dress a beefstake." says l.
"Arrah! but where's the beefstake?"
says he.
"Sure, couldn't we cut a slice off the
pork?" says /.
BE gor, I never thought o. that"
says the Captain. You're clever
fellow, Paddy" says he, laughin
We'll. then." says I, "if you put me
ashore there beyant, and sure I can AK
them for to lind me the loan of a
s'e' "sure' f''t I told ID you before that's
France" says he, land sure they are all
furriners there" says the Captain.
Well" says I, land how do you know
but I'm as good furriner myself as
any O. thin? Party VOC frongsay."
says !.
"Oh, your humble servant" says he;
why. by gor, you're scholar. Paddy,
says the Captain. and. pull away. boys,
and put Paddy ashore. and maybe We
won't get good bellyful before long"
So, with that, it was no sooner said
nor done-they pulled and got close
into shore In less than no time, and
run the boat up in little creek, and
contrived to scramble on, one way or
tother, towards little bit iv wood
that was close to the shore. and the
smoke curlin' out iv 1t, quite timptin'
like. There was a house there, and a
parcel of men. women and child-her,
ating their dinner round a table, quite
convanient.
And so wint up to the door. and
thought I'd be very civil to them, as
heerd the Frerich was always mighty
p'lite intirely-and thought I'd show
them knew what good manners was
SO took off my hat. and, making low
bow. says I. God save all here" says I.
Well. to be sure, they all stapt ating
at wanst. and began to stare at me,
and faith they almost looked me out
of countenance-and thought to my
self, it was not good manners at all,
more betoken from furriners which they
call so mighty plite: but never mind
ed that. in regard o. wantin' the grid
iron; and so. says I, II beg your par
don for the liberty take. but it's only
bein' in disthress in regard of ating
II you could lind me the loan of a
gridiron." says I, "I'd be entirely
obleeged to ye."
BY gor, they all stared at me twice
worse nor beforehand wild that, says 1
(knowing what was in their minds
Indeed, it's thrue for you I'm tathered
to pieces, and God knows I look quare
enough-but it's by raison of the
Storm" says I, (which dhruv us ashore
here below, and we're all starvin'."
So then they began to look at each
other again: and myself, seeing at once
dirty thoughts was in their heads, and
that they TUX me for poor beggar
coming to crave charity-with that,
says I. 20. not at all. by no names
we have plenty of mate ourselves there
t.~lA
be plased to lind us, the loan of grid
iron." says I. maxim low bow.
Well, with that. throth. they stared
at me twice worse nor ever. and faith
began to think that maybe the Captain
was wrong. and that 1t was not France
at all, at all; and so. says /, II beg
pardon, maybe I'm under mistake,
but I thought was in France. sir.
Aren't you furriners? Party VOC frong-
say"
I'VE, munseer," says he.
"Then would you lind me the loan
Of a gridiron." says I, ''if you plase?"
They stared at me as If had seven
heads. and. faith, myself began to
feel flushed like and onaisy, and So,
says I, maxim bow and scrape again.
IT know it's a liberty take, sir. but
it's only in regard Of bein' cast away
and If you phase, sir. party VOC frong-
say"
I'VE, munseer." says he, mighty
sharp.
Then would you lind me the loan OF
a gridiron?" says I, land obleege me-"
well, that ould chap with head of
hair as white as silver began to num-
seer me: but the devil bit of grid
iron he'd gi' me; and so I began to
think they wor all negyars, for all their
fine manners; and throth, my blood
began to rise. and says I. by my sowl,
If it was you was in distriss." says I,
land If 1t was to ould Ireland you
KEN, it's not only the gridiron they'd
give you. If you axed 1t. but something
to put an 1t, too, and the drop o.
dhrink into the bargain" Then. think
ing I'd give him another offer, and
make him understand at last. say
wanst more, quite slow, that he might
get 1t. "Parly-voo-frongsa munscer."
I'VE. munseer," says he.
Then lind me the loan of grid
iron." says I. land bad scram to you"
III = .~,s.- a. 4 4. - IA n. -