New Britain herald. [microfilm reel] (New Britain, Conn.) 1890-1976, 1928-07-07

NOAH RUNS into
TROUBLE With CAR
Roadside Mechanics Overhaul
His FliYYer-and Permanently
(Contributed)
Dear Andy:
No doubt you and the two dizzy
blends which We dated for a show
and a feed thrown In was disap-
pointed the other night when l fails
to show up but after l explains
about the hard luck ] had with my
flivver maybe you'll realize ] wasn't
to blame. 1t seems that hard luck
and ME chums together like col
lar and tie. It's almost midnight on
a country road as I'm returning from
an outa town errand when the en-
gine coughs itself into commissions
on account Of the gas tank going
dryer than a desert traveller with
out warning.
A nearby farmhouse, with garage
attached, looks like a place where
/ can get help. / enters the yard
and losses some gravel against an
upstairs window to attract atten-
ton. A sleepIy looking guy in pa
jamas pokes his bean out (also
something that may have been q
table leg but looked like double
barreled shotgun to mel and de-
mands, what do yuh WANT" !
explains, Il got a flivver outside
and" What do yuh want me to
do, buy it," he asks, sarcastic. !
tells him all want is to buy cou-
pie of quarts of gas SOS ! can get
home and don't mean by pushing
the flivver.
"A party of picnickers stopped
here this morning and took every
thing but the poison ivy" he re-
lates for my benefit. I'm telling him
I'm no picnicker and his poison ivy
is safe from me. when he inter
rupts, And they'd have taken that
too, If their arms wasn't already
full of roses and rhubarb plants"
To be sociable l asks why don't he
keep good watch dog. Il did own
a bloodhound" he answers, but he
bit city slicker and died" Seeing
no help was coming my way l beats
it. muttering, mice sociable guy
but not really blaming him on ac-
count of knowing what he has to
put up with. tourists and such.
Anyways / makes the mistake of
leaving the flivyer by the roadside
and hoofs the miles to home. The
following morning I returns to the
scene of my troubles, and finds
them doubled. My poor Lizzie had
undergone a complete overhauling.
with none of the parts put back.
1t had once been a touring car but
was now a stripped-down roadster
and looked like something the kids
dragged about the streets on Halo
ween. II had heard about the
handy roadside mechanics" that
had more nerve than an aching
tooth and took everything that
wasn't nailed down, but this was
the first time I've ever seen the re-
suits OF their labors).
All of tho pylinjaru u-aS p,icci,,o
and permanently. Every tire in
GLIDING the spare that cost me $4.9S
at a bargain sale, was gone. Also
the starter, magnetic, tenders, hood,
not to mention the coils. battery.
timer carburator ETC.. and the tools
under the seat. Even the piece of
suspenders that was doing duty in
place Of the fan belt was gone. 1t
seems like everything was removed
but the rattles and body squeaks.
If the motor was running they'd
probably have taken the engine ex-
haust). The body was still left on
the chassis SO l guess it must of
been too heavy to carry away.
The steering wheel was also left
but maybe they overlooked it or
else didn't have a drivers license
and was afraid to take chance on
the highway. A sense of humor
must OF belonged to the roadside
mechanics because note was
dangling from the windshield,
which read Thanks for the spare
parts. Will be back for the horn
later" As I'm gazing sadly at Liz
zie garage repair car stops be-
side, the driver once-overs what
I'm looking at, and states, I'll put
that gas wagon in running condi-
ton for 60 berries" yeah" an.
swers. turning my pockets inside
out and picking up the lone dollar
as it hit the ground, IF ] had 50
more we'd talk business. Anyways
the only way you'd get her to move
faster than IL miles per hour would
be. to put charge OF nervous dy-
Mantle under her."
80 that's how come, Andy, 1 failed
to show up and my Lizzie that was
once able to gallop about like an
athletic mule got towed to an auto
cemetery" where I'm hoping they'll
put her on top of the heap and let
her rest in pieces. Noah Count