The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1928-11-05
Play Time
Danger" in
Middle Age
BY MARTHA LEE

! SOm6UlmeS, when uldIl SpSuUS
his entire youth working and slav-
ing to get ahead financially in this
world, by the time he is forty or
so and he has money ahead,
good business and not many wor-
ries, he suddenly discovers for the
first time in his life he can't play!
All the time other boys were
having good time, learning to
play, finding out what to do in
their spare time, enjoying the free
dom and the responsibility that
youth makes permissible, this boy
was working-long hours-with no
time for anything but sleep after
work.
And now the time has come
when he dare relax, dareS take time
out to play a little. And he doesn't
know how! His friends are all, by
this time well acquainted with golf
and horseback riding, and when a
man is forty he feels very silly ap-
pearing amateurish with a golf
stick. He is more self-conScious
about his lack Of ability st sports
than he would have been fifteen
years before.
But there is the time to be dis
posed with. And along with the
fact that he can not play because
he dcEs not know how, is his fall
ure of having learned how to enjoy
himself with books, music, any of
the finer arts. All he knows how
to do is work strenuously.
So in his play hours he looks
for his play with persons who are
inferior to him, so that he may
retain the self-respect his business
acumen has given him. He can't
have any fun with those who make
him uncomfortable with their cul-
ture, their ability to do the things
he would like SO much to be able
to do. If the man is married, it is
twice as difficult. Because as a
general rule his wife and children
are the ones who suffer. I have
letter from a woman who has
husband, steady and reliable until
he was around forty, who has be-
come a play boy.
Dear Miss Lee: Ny husband Is forty
three and a seIf-made man. He is very
brilliant and has an excellent position. We
have thee children. Up until about a
half year ago. he was steady and reliable
and wonderful to US. And then something
happened. He was able to relax after
years Of hard work and for some reason
has taken to running around as his form
of recreation.
1t has made me very Jealous and as a
result we quarreled constantly. 1t finally
got to the point where we could not talk
to each other without finally getting
around to the that point. Girls we're
calling up the house for him. often when
he was not there. A couple of times when
they asked for him when he was out
told them he was not there. but that
was his wife and could do anything for
them. The answer has been could you
tell me where I can reach him?' Miss
Lee. this has been Just too much. espe-
cially when he came home and was furi-
Gus about what I had said.
Now he has left. He very seldom sleeps
home and never eats here. He said II
would let him alone until he got through
playing around he would be glad to come
home. He provides for us as usual and
comes home every two days to see how
we are getting along. It is not that I am
considering packing up and leaving. only
what is there for me to do to help the
situation? have friends in and try to
arrange a good time. but that does not
seem to be what he wants. He shuns
all our old friends and even his relatives.
He says he wants TO be free TO come
and go as he pleases. I will admit did
great deal of quarreling with him at
first. but he certainly provoked quarreling
with the way he was acting. The point
| Is. TO matter II I did have reason To
quarrel with him. It has done no good
/ I have led a very sad and lonely life
these months. He says I am dumb and
unintersting. I guess I am too old-fash-
Toned. But I love him dearly Just the
same. Could you tell me what to do2
My dear, just what you are doing
is about all there is to do. Just
sit tight and don't rock the boat
1t is horrible that you should have
to go through with this, but quar-
reling with him has done abso-
lutely no good, nor reasoning
either, take from your letter. You
have the three children. Interest
yourself in them. And improve
yourself during the time you are
alone. Learn just what clothes
will look best on you. Develop STYLE
and taste. Read and improve youi
mind. He is probably youth.
struck" Some men get that way
around the age of forty. The thing
to do is point out to him your owl
good qualities, your beauty of soul
how much lovelier an old love car
be than a new one. Buck up, ny
dearr and by all means just stay