New Britain herald., 1928-03-10
NOAH COUNT LOSES
 HIS GIRL. ..AND HOW
Poor Magnesia Has a Job
 Anyhow
tContributed) Dear Andy Dale:


 I was still keeping steady or un- steady company with the girl friend I'd met last week. No, l don't any more. l finally gave her up when she told me not to call on her again as she wouldn't have anything more 10 do with me. But she missed me tshe threw a fat-iron at me but Oh, Boy. she missed me.) l guess love is like that, One day a fella is parked on the top of a friendly world and the next thing he knows he's on q toboggan slide and doing a Steve Brodie outa the love nest and then nature don't seem so grand. II "'i happened the night I proposed to her.
 tu tell you about it sos you'll un- derstand why I was given the gate with its well oiled hinges and told to kindly omit the slamming and not bother to send postal cards as passed through and outa her life. Putting on an extra pair of socks sos l wouldn't get cold feet, I calls on this jane who is dream in any body's language. We parks ourselves in the parlor near the radio and hears the Happiness Boys from WEAF sing that popular song en- titled What a Lovin' Papa Gets From Lovn' Mamma on Pay Day" l guess the song made me kinda sentimental because I says, Mag nesia, some time when you happen to think of it and aint got nothing else to do, will you marry me- 1 Marry you," she eXclaims. "why, you ain't even got a job" No" l answers. but you have" For mn- ute (and q minute only) she was speeches.. Then she snapped outa her daze and hands me q "bawling out that mentioned all would be Eomeos in general. and me in par tiCular. Coming to the last words in her vocabulary she says, "If you think my job is gonna keep you in the garden of ease you're making a bigger miscue than the dumb bimbo who looked into the muzZle and pull ed the trigger of one of those didn't know it was loaded" guns. You cer- tainly got q nerve.'
 "Heh," l admits. looking sheepish like a goat that's been caught in the act of making q meal outa the 'drygoods on the clothes line, "I got so much nerve that l even had q dentist kill some of il in an aching tooth" l continues. Being outa a job is nothing 10 get peeved about. even the Prince of Wales ain't got one, unless you calls falling off a galloping sparkplug and picking yourself ollta the mud work "The Prince of Wales" she answers, lis a sorta walking delegate, that visits different nations and helps to keep 'em on speaking terms" Sorta like our Iindy," l agrees, ''only it would be suicide for him to ride a plane
 One word followed another and soon the course of true love was hit ting on less cylinders than 1t takes 10 move a Whcolbarrow across the street. She asks why didn't I keep my clerlling job in the shoe store. I tells her l was always getting in Dutch. II seems that when some iapper Fannie with big hoofs came ln for a pair of new kicks and wanted cm three sizes too small for her. I'd suggest she buy brogans or romcthng as they'd be more com tor,able and not choke her n-steps. Another time l tells the store deiec- tive to keep an eye on the well dress cd ginlt that was loaiing around since tarly morning and giving everything the onco-ovcr The detective hands mt the merry raspberries as he men tlonS the well dressed gink is the noorWalker.
 ''Anyways.' ] says, "I got fired on account of thinking of you" She demands hotlv. How comc?' explains, "I was thinking of you and didn't notice the manager was watching me as l absentmindedlt wrapped up q five cent purchase in Il ten dollar bill and sent the GUS toner home in taxi l guess she n2ured | vas kidding her along and she calls her old man. l got pceFed and vas gonna tell her what, l thought of her only In too much Of .4 gentleman to toll q jane what ] thinks of her in front of q lnonlber Of the family especially when ne IS bigger than mo. So that's how come, Andy, ] don't keep steady or un- steady company with my girl friend Nagncsla.
 A ever.
 NOAH COUNT.