Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1928-09-02

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fairs, he used to carry a
banner in the Labos day
parade
ParadeS we're paradeS in those days,
they covered the entire length of Main
street, with brass band at each end
It often took them half an hour to pass
given point: you could drop out almost
anywhere along the line of march, re-
fresh Yourself with seidel OF beer ana
return la find the procession Just about
where YOU left il, True, If you dropped
cut too often YOU might get stepped on
by a horse but that was all in the game.
Young MIR Gully always felt Ike a
crusader for glorious cause rs he
marched down the Belgian-bloCk pave
ment. with gift cigar between his
teeth and a lettercd gonfalon flying
above his head while fat policemen in
helmets ana bartenders' mustaches held
back the crowds to let him pass. They
were an indispensable feature of the
Labor day festivities. these policemen.
AS time went on, the Labor day pa
radc grew more attenuated The path
which the officers Of the law made in
the crowded street was narrower, and
the attitude of the crowd itself was less
aWe-stricken and deferential In 1906
the parade was almost completely de-
moyali2ed by a runaway horse which had
taken fright at new and noisy vehicle
known as the gasoline buggy. And in
1908 one of these buggieS actually APP
pc3red in the rocesSion~-chugglng
coughing and splitting blue smoke. The
gaping spectators cheered and shouted
encouragement to the driver.
This was the beginning of the end of
marching as means of self-expreSsion.
The following year more automobiles
Joined the Labor day parade. and the
clYbs were lined with cars. MIR. Guffy,
with his brave little banner. was lost in
n maze Of mudguar6s and machinery,
Twice he was rudely bumped by tenders,
and at almost every street intersection
he had to wait until break in the traf-
fic permitted him to continue his un-
triumphal progress.
To Mr.. Guffy, hardened marcher
though he was. the experience was de-
pressing. According to all the laws Of
custom and precedent, spectators should
stand still while the parade goes by.
But instead, the parade stood still while
the spectators went by. This was rest
full for the marchers perhaps, but 1t de-
prived them of the exhilarating sense
that they were going somewhere and
accomplishing something. AS sta
tiOnary background for croSs-tOWn
traffic they felt relatively unimportant.
Finally Mr. Guffy gave up the strIg-
gle and bought a car himself 1t was
a Zodiac Four, class of H. with a ton
ueau modelled after the Colosseum at
Rome--but not long after. 1t wore IFS
crank on the side. like phonograph,
and the back seat was elevated so that
its occupants got q bird's-eye view OF
the road ahead The horn was little
brass trumpet attached TO a massive
rubber bulb resembling a punching bag
Whenever Mr.. Guffy wished to warn
pedestrian that he was coming It was
necessary for him to take both hands
of the wheel and squeeze the bulb
frantically. II the Swedish exercises
were vigorous enough. the horn would
emit feeble squawk like the mating
cali of love-sick cassowary--and the
pedestrian. duly warned. would amble
over and help Mr.. Gufy back his car
off the curb.
With the Zodiac Four. MFR Gudy was
able to take an active part in the new
Labor day parades--the professions Of
automobiles which crawled out Of the
city In unbroken double lines on the
first Monday of September clamoring
hoarsely at every halt. scraping Tenders,
jumping bumpers, while their drivers
breathed the heady fumes of carbon
nonoxide and unchanged bits Of spar
king profanity. It was as II every ono
belonged to one big family--the Jukes
family.
Though Mr. Guffy no longer marched.
he still carried banners The back OF
his car was decked with remnants, and
his windshield was so covered with
gumned labels that he had to peer
around 1t in order to see the road.
whenever Mr. Guffy motored through
a town he picked up a souvenir Of some
sort, even If it were only a tack in his
tire
Last Labor day MIR Guffy loaded his
family into the Zodiac and set out for
an all-day motor trip The problem Of
where 10 go had been solved the day
before when Mrs Guffy clipped road
map from the automobile section Of the
Sunday paper This map showed the
route OF the newly-opened dust-to-dust
highway which ran through Cantilever
Springs, the Carlsbad Of America
Mr. Gudy drove and Mrs Guffy pre-