davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
New Britain herald., 1927-03-05
SNAP.

BY Minnie Z. Hitler
4 woman accompanied by her
husband. who was carrying a small
package. entered the fur coat sec
ton OF the department store.
"A fur coat?' smiled the sales
man. How high would you wish to
go? We have them from $50 up
The customer shifted.
Il wish to see the most expensive
coat in the store she said sweetly.
THE most expensive coat in the
store Madam" explained the SAILS
man, his eyebrows going up q
tM1e, costs 100000
THAT makes no difference 10
me-" the woman snapped. Bring
il out want to try it on
The coat, a gorgeous thing look
ing even more expensive than tbs
price tag, was brought out ard
tried on.
"Rieht over here is mirror
Madam" invited the clerk. BE
fore buying, perhaps you'd better
"Who said anything about buying
The cOlt?' the customer demanded
She nodded to her husband, who un,
tied the package and took out {
kodak. III stand over by the win
iow, John. where the light is bet
ter Take a good picture, ana ri
send it to Lulu Jones. If she think!
she can get ahead of mo she's sadl,
mietakon"
New Britain herald., 1927-03-05
!MINI 81. OF MAILS

The large number Of New Britain
residents VINO are being bothered
Hith unordercd merchandise sent TO
them through the mails are victims
Of a system which the post office
department should do all in its pow
or to discourage.
The practice Of sending goods to
persons who have not ordered any
thing depends for its success upon
psychology. i probably is hoped by
the firms which misuse the mails
in this fashion that people viii con-
clude. once they have the goods in
the house, that they might as well
pay for them. That the firms have
misjudged the psychology, however
is Indicated by the fact that three
quarters Of the people thus pestered
return the goods A minimum &C.
capt and do pay for them, and can
not he made TO pay, according tc
the postmaster. Others, good naturec
about 1t. send the money,
There was a time in the his'or,
Of tho post office when certain un
crupulous magazine publisher
I ..t.f.,,.If,. cont ,Lair r,E.traticns :,
New Britain herald., 1927-03-05
posi- OFFICE IMPROVEMENTS

As was suggested in these columns
some time ago, proposing pos, o.
:jca Improvements and getting them
are TWO diffaren: things. The 10,
result Of the congressional fiIlbus-
ter in Congress as concerned locally
is that all hopes Tor an carly con
summation OF the plan 10 expand
the New Britain post office went
gHmmering with failure 10 pass The
public buildings bin in the Sanats.
The Ola Guard Was so busy fill
clustering that such an important
matter as providing the post Office
department. with adequate facilities
was not considered worth while,
Nov Britain will wait The firs.
five years Of waiting viii he The
hardest. Meanwhile post office con-
ges'tou VIII sic at,a traffic cor@as-
lion.
New Britain herald., 1927-03-05

local election is embodied IN the
plan to reduce the number Of by
elections. on the score they can be
te,i q. the same time % the more
important elections. These more
important elections, OF course, are
The national and congressional
electlons-pariicularly the former.
In New York state, for instance,
the Republicans have a spleHdiilF
arrarg j plan to have the govern
orship elections every four years
held at the same time as the ma
uorM presidential elections,
The idea, of course, is that the
Republican state and local candi-
dates thus will be able to fly Oh the
tail Of the presidential kite, Il is
recalled that the only time Gov
arnor Smith was defeated WAS once
when ne was running for governor
at the same time the voters were
selecting a president. That time he
was defeated by Miller.
The reason given for four-yoar
eoyernorship term and elections at
the same time the president is
elected is that It would mean more
economy. Il costs Just as much to
hold a hy-election as a regular"
election, the political strategists tel
the public; hence why not save
some money and practice economy?
Il would also be playing deep
sort os politics, but this isn't men
toned.
The same thory Is being put for
ward In Connecticut. We are told
that the special town and city cleo
/ lions for local officers are a waste
Of money; that only a third o, the
/ people participate in the voting;
that the local elections may as well
be held at the same time the
larger and more important cleo
pioneering is under way. Il would
save the towns and cities money, is
tho claim.
The deep politics lurking behind
the movement, however, is not well
advertised, The grand old party
gentlemen who favor such economy
hesitate to state that what they
dislike more than the expense and
the failure Of many people 70 take
advantage OF their voting privileges
is the fact that the by-elcctions are
decided without national and state
issues cluttering up the public
mind. with the result that the pcsky
Independents. insurgents, Demo-
Gratis and such gentry usually have
a much easier time 10 get elected
than would he the case if the ma
tional or state issues were being de-
ciIcd at the same time.
The politicians know that a con
gressional election between the
presidential elections always re
suits in a larger proportion Of in
dependents and Democrats attain.
ing Office; that town or citl
election held at the same time tina
state officials are before the people
for election always results in 81
advantage TO the party whose STATE
officials gain the victory. The les
ser political lights in the towns car
always rely upon floating into Of
flee hanging 10 the larger kite.
The truth is that on such occa
sions the small fry do not need t.
seek office on their own merits bu
can got there on somebody else
merits. That's the system the CRANE
J old party would ike to make gen
New Britain herald., 1927-03-05
A PEPPE.RN SESSION
COMES TO ITS END

Filibustering having been one OF
the main occupations Of the Senate
az it neared the closing hours, the
usual result was achieved: Some
important legislation failed Of pas
sage. Yet it is q mistake to think
few bills were churned into law;
perhaps some OF the bills were Of an
insignificant nature and possessing
little interest to the public at large.
But their total was nearly 700; at
least. this is the total OF public bills
and Joint resolutions signed by the
President The fact is the legislative
output has exceeded that Of any
previous Congress, with the cXcep-
ton Of the 59th, which enacted 775
pubic measures.
The second session Of the Gath
Congress - the one which has just
terminatcd-res in the fol-
lowing outstanding achievements
| Passage of the Pepper McFa iden
banking act, including extension Of
/ federal reserve charters. Radio reg
/ ulatlon act. The rivers and harbors
act totalling $7l.S7o.o0o, including
/ the purchase Of the Cape cod canal.
I Naval appropriation bill which in
! cludes three cruisers and dirigihl"S
! Ghis opposed by the President and
/ there are hints that a delay amount
ing TO notification Of the act is in
prospect.) The McNary-
! farm relief bill, vetoed by he Prrsi-
| dent. The resolutions of moment in
| Guided one approving Of the use OF
the treasury surplus for debt retire
mcnt; arbitration Of disputes with
! Mexico-both resolutions originating
in the Senate. And a House rosolu-
ton favoring independent American
treaty action in China. Failure OF
the deficiency bill, however, makes
some Of these achievements inoper.
ativc.
The most important event OF Tho
second session, of course, was tn
Presidents veto OF the farm relic
bill, which is likely to be one O
the prime issues in the coming cam
paign. The motion to pass the bill
over the veto failed, but its support
ers have given notice that the four
year struggle TO enact the McN9ry
Haugen measure will be renewed il
the 10th Congress. which will b.
composed of more anti-adminjstra
ton and independent congrossmci
than the Goth Congress.
One Of the interesting develop
, ments has been tho use Of clotur
in preventing unlimited debate j.
the Senate. Cloturc specifies tn
limitation of debate. and requires
, two-thirds majority Of the Senate t
invoke. Where the ma iority is lack
ing. a filibustcr resGfs--Whlch cX
plains the presence Of the fijibustcr
! the past few days. In spite Of hc'
, senators like 10 enjoy unlimited d.
, bate upon legislation, especially thu
which they wish 10 smother undo
a ceaseless broadcast Of talk. Gle
, turo was invoked twice during I'll
@ Ggth Congress. once in each session
, It's adoption led TO action on II
World Court protocol in the fin
session and on the popper-Mcl'a'
den banking bin in tho second. O
o other bills it WAS rejected in bot
5 sessions. From this it can b" i
= ferrel that cloturc Is Il fine thin
u when It Is permitted to operate
y but whore the senators have II
privilege Of rejecting It if only
= shade more than onc-third Of II
I members are opposed 10 it, the r
q form docs not mean so very muc
9 The total OF fairly imrortal
New Britain herald., 1927-03-05
Al God's CbiI|um Got Wings.

\ group Of youngsters between
the ages of four and six We're hear
ing the story Of Daniel in the lions
den for the first time.
The Sunday School teacher, to
better explain the lesson, was show
ing thom Il picture which portrayed
Daniel in the den of lions, kneeling
in the attitude Of prayer.
She then asked the class what
they thought Daniel was doing
thinking they would answer Pray
ing" but no one answered.
Finally she said, well, what
would you do, if you We're Daniel?'
IA rum" chirped one bright lit
tic fellow.
Catherine Dick
New Britain herald., 1927-03-05

tNOTE: Shakespeare was known
as the Bard OF Avon. It Is stated
that he was thus nicknamed be-
cause he always hung around an
English Inn and invariably stood be
fore the bar shouting Avon ano-
thcr. "-Editor.)
Quiz No. !.
! How far is New York from
Madrid, Spain, as the crow flies?
Why does a chicken cross the
street?
3 Where is the greatest amount
Of quartz found"
Why will people almost choke
with laughter at the contents OF the
forthcoming Fun SHOP BOOK?
Answers:
Whose crow.
TO show the traffic cop he1
knees.
. Quarts of what?
4 Because it's full Of gags.
Copyright, 1927, Reproduction
Forbidden)
New Britain herald., 1927-03-05

time ago fire was discovered in an
unused shanty in the Ear OF his
yard and the fire department Sas
notified. While awaiting the arrival
of the apparatus, the goldman
stood in his office. Presently the
telephone bell rang and a mans
voice inquired rs there fire down
at your coal-yard?"
Yes" answered the merchant,
IAN Old unused shanty is burning"
"Oh, ! see" came the voice from
the other end, Il thought it must be
something like that. because l knew
your coal wouldn't burn
Parents troubled with the problem
of what to name their male Off
spring may turn to the common
council roster for great variety of
Christian names from which TO
make a selection. The council is
composed Of 81 members including
the mayor. Councilmen Gibney.
/ Warner, Greene and Boyle and AL
derman Judd share the name Will
liam; Councilmen Mack. Buckley
and Larson and Alderman Naerz
have John for their first name:
Councilmen Caldwell, Goddard and
Zapatka sign Frank; but no two
of the remaining 10 members have
the same Christian name. Included
are; Gardner, Thure, Clarence, AL
| len. Frederick, Alexander, Donald.
Albert, Adrian, Harry, Joseph.
James. Lucien, Samuel, Thomas,
David, Walter, Gustav and Bolc-
/ slaus.
This is tickle weather for auto
mobiles. 1t causes much attention
| to be directed TO the radiator. With
| the shifting temperature you are
| either frozen or boiling over You
cant make the mercury go down
when there is alcohol in the car or
UP when you use plain water: it
simply will not fall In with your ac-
| tons. The result is an almost con-
tinual jet of steam shooting ont Of
your radiator cap and making your
car look like an Old wood burning
! locomotive. The process is some
thing like this:
In preparation for a cold spell
you pour in several quarts of alco-
hoi anu az" NE 10 'iiVl 'dies "ai 4
y, (. itoou S'i-' i' a., ,o.ei ~,
Man Zero to freeze up your machine.
But the weather fools you in spite
of everything and takes a turn for
.'e di'il,'. NJ I'ool' C"'g' anu
,i'e s'tCosloi ~ .up il,,'' /. Gnu ~,
w" ',, l1o"s, '''''.''ts' ~" III,
nc '''''.,.oi "i'-l W, 80, e,lp
I1l''o,o 'i,I g. !'''' MS ~ W..
i''0t NJ
a 'i'9 ~ VI M ''1,' il!o','.'l.' '''lI
~ 1i'>' l''o, ms ~ NJ - 80
- o1e-l "p anu ''0'i LIS VII S'''''''
o'io7 i''o4e
You put the cover PACK on. run
the engine ana gradually hreaA
away the ice. AZ last the thlng Is
successfully tha"ed. ana again you
STOCK up WIN aico.oi' on ih"he
snort drive 10 work Win 'he cover
on and the nap 9at'ohea' IN order
10 generate an lAe neat posslol9 LOT
'he long speil OF S'ahdihs III 'ho
cold street 10" come ouL VI tI'o
oI'ce uliu START o'l 'o'is5e' '"e'
hI4SSlui!y Forgetting 'h"t 20" nav
not let the Zap down no ar at aii
reaches 'He iiH'"'oi' "hu S''i'e ~
windshield.
ipu MAN q - -N+i ''''A = '''N 4'o'4i7
New Britain herald., 1927-03-05

lney serve. AS tllS IOpuldtlOll Oh
their territories increases. their IA
cilities must be increased. Greater
patronage requires more buses. Fa-
cilities have not kept in step with
the growth in population. This can
easily be determined during rush
hours when overcrowded buses
leave their terminals. frequently
forcing other would-be riders to
wait on the curb for the next bus.
The situation cannot be tolerated
much longer. Operators should
realize that they must grow with
their districts.
With the approach Of Spring. we
are arranging a series OF outdoor
sports for the tired business man
who doesn't care for golf ana looks
very queer in plus As. We amend
that last phrase to say the games
are for those tired business men
who know they look queer in .lus
As. There's a difference in the two
sentences which will be noticed by
turning this paper until four faces
and a little dog are clearly seen,
There are some prizes offered but
we know you'd rather go into this
for the fun OF the thing rather than
for an material reward.
First let US consider the possibili-
| ties in bicycle riding. Bicycles or
pixies as the slang phrase goes
| provide an excellent avenue OF eX-
| crCise for the man under "a Whose
J legs are still good. Why not make
| I'D a club ont Of your ncighbors
| and call yourselves, say, THE Mer-
| ~ Bikers" or The WEIGH Street
! Eicyclc Outing Association" We
| prefer the latter name. 1t is so dig
| uificd. The wives of the members
could pack dainty luncheons anc
with a Jolly Changing OF bicycle bells
| the cayalcadc would wheel merrllJ
over the hills to some distant point
say Jerome street. The idea has
! possibilities, especially to the mar
! who already owns a pair OF bicycle
clips to keep his trousers tucked II
neatly at the ankles. Those who dc
not possess such clips are advised
/ to ride in bathing suits.
Another suggestion which nigh
| appeal to those whose legs won
reach the pedals of the bikes il
that of Saturday afternoon fro&
| hunts, popular now in some section:
of Assyria and Utah. Just oodle'
of fun exists for the man who cast
aside the business worries Of tn
week to sally forth on a Saturda,
afternoon in quest Of the cluslV'
yellow stomach frog. These can b.
fairly easily lured by calling III tn
manner OF a mating frog, wheel
| can be accomplished with an or
binary storage battery or an OIL
telephone directory. After the cal
has been answered by a frog, tn
hunter should hastily construct
blind on the side of the pool, am
being careful 10 remain up-WiE'
from the approaching frog, shout
wait until he gets the chance for
clean shot behind the left shoulder
We are reminded of a hunter VIII
mixed UP shoulders and placed
$3.50 soft nosed bullet behind III
RIGHT shoulder Of a charging Gin
namon bear. We had many a heart
chuckle over the incident and tn
amateur "nimrod' would prohabl
have laughed himself had the Il
ragged beast left enough to laug
With. One thing more, don't h
fooled by practical iokers VINO div
in the pool and answer your Turin
New Britain herald., 1927-03-05

Ny wife's mother I have leased
Until she should be sore,
Instead Of that she seems quite
pleased
And comes right back for more:
But here's one point I'd have you
note
To show for all I did
Although l never got her goat,
B'gosh | got her KID
c. NJ. Sloane
New Britain herald., 1927-03-05

measures which 20 hot rearh q final
vote on account Of tha l'ibusteriag
indicates a weakness Of the present
parliamentary systau-mHeh talk,
.r-s.-ut and minimum of b.si-
ur.a-l.aa .C,iDu.
New Britain herald., 1927-03-05
Our FaNoritc Spring Tonic

Our Fayoritc Spring Tonic
In the days OF red flannel and buck
wheats, It's true
They used TO drink bonese. when
March winds We're due.
But Folks, were for fun-set, that
tonic Of mirth
Browoj from good humor, blest
herb OF this Garth.
New Britain herald., 1927-03-05

Member Audit Bureau Of Circulation.
TIE A. B. c /. national oieauzatof
which furnishes newspapers snH AaNs'
.iser, with s.rctiy noneT Analysis OF
circulation Our circulation -thtlellts
s-s bagea upon ,his audl. THIS 'usnfes
protection again: fraud IN newspaper
distribution fg1 {. to both rational and
local advertisers
New Britain herald., 1927-03-05

The A.eOciatei Pfes- IL eIC .u1iNey tn
ti,Ied to the use foi re-puhl alton q
al ,s~, crea',ra to II o. cot uthefvse
credited IN ,hl. paper and also local
new, published therein
New Britain herald., 1927-03-05
THE OBSER YER
Makes Random Observations
On the City and Its People

Former Chairman John +. X,
keevers Of the fire board cannot
well ignore the virtual challenge Is
sued at a meeting of the ordinance
committee Thursday night by Cor
poration Counsel John H. kirkham
over the question whether Mr.. kirk-
ham gave Mr.. keevers an opinion
regarding the age limit at which
men may be appointed to the per
nanent fire department.
A few weeks ago Mr.. kirkham
ruled that a man who has not reach
Cd his 36th birthday is still 50
years old BY this ruling two cam
didates for the fire department who
had passed their 35th birthdays
were appointed. 1t was then alleged
that Mr.. hirkham, TWO years ago,
expressed an opposite opinion, stat
ing that no candidate who had pass
ed his 18th birthday could be ap-
pointed to the regular fire fighting
force. MIR. kirkham says he does
not recall giving this opinion. Mr..
keevers is said to have made the
| statement that such an opinion
was rendered while he was chair
man OF the fire commission.
In the interests of all concerned
it is proper that all doubt be clear
Cd up. The opinion which Mr..
| Kirkham is said to have given Mr..
, keevers was of a verbal nature and
no record of l. exists. But this is
not sufficient. Mr.. keevers, by de-
scribing the circumstances OF his
meeting with Mr.. Kirkham. may be
able to refresh Mr.. Kirkham's mind
| on the subject. Then again, Mr.
/ Kirkham may be able to convince
/ Mr.. keevers that he was in error
| or that he misunderstood what was
said. 1t is possible tina. either ma,
| be wrong and the best method o!
| settling the argument IS to have the
! disputants come face TO face anc
! explain the merits Of their respec'
! tive contentious. Mr.. kirkham is q
cautious, conservative lawyer OF
wide experience and should kno"
what he is talking about. On the
! other hand Mr.. keevers was chair
man OF the tire commission and, as
such would pay great attention tc
opinions from the corporation coun'
sci.
/ Patrons OF jitney bus lines have
( asked the Observer to call attention
/ to overcrowding at certain hours OF
the day when traffic is heavy. The
hours referred TO are early in the
. morning when factory workers ars
on their way to their places o. EN-
ploymcnt, the noon hour and tbs
evening period when they are re-
turning to their homes. Conditions
during the rush, are not conducive
to safety or comfort.
The operation of jitney buses
opened I'D new residential areas
which probably would not have beer
developed if the trolley care was de
pended on. The cost Of construct
ing tracks and operating trolley'
was said by the Connecticut com
pany 10 be prohibitive. At thi'
point the jitney bus entered tn
field, serving districts which wer'
without transportation facilities. 70
this the public should be grateful t.
promoters OF the lines.
There is. however, an obligation
toward the public which the opera
tors cannot very well avoid recog
MIXING. This is to keep step viii
he areas Wnlcl
New Britain herald., 1927-03-05
New Britain Herald
HERALD PUBLISHING coHpAS1

Issued Daily teunda, Excepted
Al Herald Bldg. 81 Church street
New Britain herald., 1927-03-05

TIE HeralA I. on sale daily in Ne"
y1rk a, Ho.aHngs Newsstand, Times
square, schultz's Nensstands. Entrance
Grand Central. f2nc Street
New Britain herald., 1927-03-05
or VI AR ELECTIONS
SHOT Id MAIN

ono Of the neat little efforts he
ing made by The grand Old party
TO get better grip upon stats and
New Britain herald., 1927-03-05

The only profitable advertising med nm
D., the Cf,y Circulation books and prxss
room always open to acfertlsert
New Britain herald., 1927-03-05

Entered At the Poet once a. New britain
~ second Clam Nal Matter.
New Britain herald., 1927-03-05

a free country is one in which
the group that knows what l. wants
usually gets il.
New Britain herald., 1927-03-05
SUBSCRIPTION RATES

tlee Year.
1900 Three Month";
tie. Month.
New Britain herald., 1927-03-05

Our theory Is that the Germans
learned patience watching dachs-
huads 60 by.
New Britain herald., 1927-03-05
TUGITIVEs FROM JUSTICE

Misplaced World
7 know the world IS very big
And l am rather small;
I Just can't understand. sometimes.
What mother means at all
New Britain herald., 1927-03-05

I always thought that I was in
The world, how can it be
Tint mother smiles and SAYS she has
Tua whole wide world in me?
Maxine Chapman
New Britain herald., 1927-03-05

Alas. Farm relief doesn't relieve
the necessity Of Swing the mules
breakfast by lantern light.
New Britain herald., 1927-03-05

80 1a1 +
JuH
M4xsON E0KAu Lnnl

! send all communications to Fun
| shop Editor, care OF the New
Britain Herald, and your letter
will be forwarded to New York.
New Britain herald., 1927-03-05

There are 902 letters in the Tartar
alphabet.
New Britain herald., 1927-03-05
TELEPHONE CALLS

Business oc'ee go, b-s
editorial Room. 49,. sis
New Britain herald., 1927-03-05
ASK US ANOTHER!

In the following test William
Shakespeare got dlf'.
New Britain herald., 1927-03-05

In this day OF record holders, It
seems odd that nobody has claimed
the distinction Of talking longest.
New Britain herald., 1927-03-05

Very few Of the big Jobs are hold
hv men who sit and hork and houli
in traffic Jam.
Brownsville herald. [volume] (Brownsville, Tex.) 1910-current, 1927-12-01
PERSONALS

j. X. Hipp. father Of A. C. Hipp,
who has been visiting in Corpus
Christi the past six weeks has re-
turned to his home.
Miss Helen Bettin will leave
Thursday evening TO visit for some
time with her sister, Mrs. Sam Il.
Viskin, in Houston.
Mr.. end Mrs. X. III. Rhamey OF
Kansas City, NO, are visiting In the
city.
Mr.. and Mrs. J.. p. Dunn % Rus
sell. Kans., are the guests OF their
80 nand dauEhter-in-law, Mr.. and
Mrs. Dewey Dunn, Of Corpus Christi
on a tour Of the Valley. They are
spending a few days in Brownsville
Tom Ransom Of Dallas is on a
business trip IN Brownsville.
Marcus s. Daley and Harry H.
Daley, both of Houston, arrived in
the city Wednesday for . short busi-
mess trip.
G. j. Alsworth and Dan Pue of
Laredo are Brownsville business Wis
itors Thursday.
j. s. Smith, ". b. Gardner, ID.
Murphy, ]. Desmberg and II. Scharff.
all Of Mexia, Tex, are stopping IN
Brownsville planning a hunting par
~. They are spending Thursday at
Point Isabel.
r.. S. Schott or NacoEdoches will
be in the city a few days on BUSH
ness.
John Sadler OF Hebronville arrived
Wednesday on business.
Mrs ]. J. Comett and Mrs. v.
England are visiting here from san
Antonio.
Brownsville herald. [volume] (Brownsville, Tex.) 1910-current, 1927-12-01
6 6 6

I'm q Prescription for
Colds, Grippe, Flu. Dengue,
Bilious Fever and Malaria.
II kills the germs