The broad ax. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1895-19??, 1927-04-23
Wooing the Rain
Clouds
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By AID scHUsTER

ID INEAPPLE PERKINS and a man
called Lobster sat In q shed near
the railroad yards. Rain fell on the
roof, found its way through cracks
and drlpped on their hats. Pineapple
and Lobster stared gIoomlly out on n
world Of puddles and mud.
This MEANS" said the former, I'VE
are going TO have hard time Of 1t,
considering the condition of the roads
and our footwear. How is a man,
whose occupation Is walking from
place TO place. going to keep up to
schedule when 1t rains like this?"
Rich" said Lobster, very rich
You're rich one. you are"
"And yet Pineapple continued. II
have seen the time when would give
all l owned for a rain like this one,
when it would have made me wealthy
beyond the dreams of Old Man Ava
rice"
"Rich." murmured his companion,
very rich. and suppose you had a
nice crop of plum buildings or some
thing all whiting in the sun for want
Of drop Of moisture? Or mebbe you
were dying Of thirst in the desert OF
SALARY. That's good, very good: rich.
I calls It."
IF you would shove that board up
little 1t will keep the rain from
falling on my head" and Pineapple
closed his eyes.
"If you were not the LATEST man In
the world you would move your head"
Lobster replied. but he moved the
board. "Now. go on. tell me about
the time you were willing to give away
so much IL II would only rain.
There was one time when &C
quired horse and buggy. At the same
time, and you may not believe II, I had
q good suit Of clothes and a high hat.
Well. I was driving along a country
road figuring on what would be when
I landed In the next town. The hat
suggested that sell medicine but that
takes hotties and corks and the chance
to visit pump after dark. I was cog
itating. as you might say II you knew
enough. when / entered the town. The
time had come. ms the bullrush said.
to think OF many things but they
wouldn't let me. Somebody spIed me
from the curb and yelled out: Hello.
Doc and Doc 7 was.
"Of course. shook hands all around
and acted agreeable without knowing
whether 7 was a toeth. horse or hu-
man dan nua Raflnrw mrahhnA - -
the arm and hustled me up the street.
"'In our hour Of need he says. we
cannot AFFORD to lose any time He
steered me to a chamber Of commerce
building where In less than no time
the whole hoard Of directors appeared.
guns on the table.
The president played with his pis-
tol while he explained they-had kid
mapped me and that It was up to me
to make good and all the time I didn't
know what was TO do. Then he let
II ont
You have been going about collect
Ing money for making It rain. and you
are on your way over to Tibbettsville
right now to collect more. Well, we
need rain worse than any Of them Tib-
bettsvllle fellows. We are the dryest
of the original drys. and It is up to
YOU
"'Oh' says I, nodding my head an
IL understood, and how quick must
act. and just how much rain would
you like?'
"He looks at me kinda funny. We're
pinched for time so you gotta work
fast. Have rain here In one week
or : and he taps his pistol. I
grInned as If rain-making was my IA
vorite job and asks careless-like what
there was in it for me when the show
ers were delivered.
Five thousand dollars" said the
man, and swallowed hard.
"After that l retired to the hotel
where had everything could order.
I found a can of washing powder,
which same put In a bottle. and told
the committee was ready. They gave
me plenty Of opportunity to move
around but always some one was on
my trail in an automobile. / could
not have escaped had wished to. So
7 dropped my washing powder here
and there. set ont cans, and acted real
businesslike. But not a cloud showed
up for encouragement and the time
for the rain or the shooting drew
near.
On the night my limit was up I
could see by the expressions of the
toynspeople I was not exactly popu-
lar
"'Just wait ] sings out, tonight II
will rain pitchforks. It takes time to
WOO the elements and you did not give
me any too much So locked myself
in my room. and after dark, slid down
a rainpipe and made tracks for the
open spaces where men can be men
and not rain-makers figured had
lost just FIVE thousand dollars.
well. they all took after me. !
could hear their autos footing along
the road, see their lanterns swinging
in the trees and knew that the shoot
Ing would start as soon as they spied
me. I ran through brush and briars
left parts Of my clothing on barb wire,
and finally escaped. 1t was dark when
threw myself on the ground and. ex.
hausted. went to sleep.
"And It was early morning when
was awakened by the rain patterina