davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Evening star., 1927-04-17
Books and Movies on Shipboard

some people / want you to meet. /
think they're up forward now"
He slapped me cheerily on the leg
and went off down the deck. noticed
that Pennpacker's hand was twitch-
ing slightly. but as Arnold did not
return / went back to my tragedy
and was soon again fast asleep.
When I awoke Mr.. Arnold was once
more in front of me. He was quite
| excited
Come on. boys" he cried. "The
| Berengaria's passing us on the other
| side-come on. Drop those books"
He reached over. took Pennypacker' s
volume from his hand, closed it, and
/ smiled.
It's about two miles away" he
said,
'Ive got to wait for Mrs. Stewart, "
/ lied.
We'll, bring her when she comes. "
| he said. Come on, old sport"
Pennypacker hesitated a moment
and then got up. Arnold led the way
| and he followed.
THE Berengaria's on the other
side" shouted Arnold as he passed a
| group of people on the rail. Then
he and Pennypacker disappeared
/ around the turn IN LtlG uSck.
Pennypacker came back few
minutes later.
lit was the Celtic" he said, and
| slid back into the chair.
| why did you go?" / asked
! Pennypacker looked at me, sorrow
! fully.
1--WE tried arguing" he said.
| ] nodded. understandingly.
| "And besides" went on the young
man. "it's only four days more"
! We went back to our books. And
! in 10 minutes Mr.. Arnold hove in
| view.
"An out, you lubbers," he called.
We're going to take some moving
/ pictures"
He took a camera out from under
| his arm and showed it to me.
Look pretty, boys" he said, and
began walking around in front OF US.
! This isn't any good" he announced.
1--WE ought to have some action.
Neither Pennypacker nor l offered
any suggestion.
II tell you what" he said. Here
a great idea. You two boys go in the
| smoking room and come out OF the
door as though you were drunk-you
know-with your hats on the back OF
your heads-it will be scream.
I looked at Pennypacker. tie got
up, hopelessly, and / followed.
| "Wait in the smoking room" com
Evening star., 1927-04-17
THAT GAY YOUNG SET ==zzzzzzzzzzzz=zzs =zzzzzz=zs

the line and choose for himself the
one who seems to him the fairestn'
1t was silly old stuff, but it worked
The orchestra threw itself joyously
into the game, the whistle blew, Phi
lander's gallant recruits from the
yacht club set the pace. Within half
an. hour, the great drawing rooms
were ringing with merriment. When
the first lull in the music let the
thirsty dancers gather around the
punch-bowl, an excited little hostess
flung both arms around Philander's
neck and stood on tiptoe to whisper:
'Phflly! You're geniusr'
Young Mrs. Harry Herndon, fuzzy
from her eighth permanent wave, and
wearing pink frills, fiuttered up to
say
"Babs! You're a public benefactor!
haven't had such a thrill in 'leyen
years! This man I'm dancing with is
just scream
The scream" who was none other
than Herbert, looked so appealingly
at Babs that she took pity on him
and rescued him from the exuberant
young matron. Again music, again
Philander's whistle, but Babs and
Herbert ignored 1t and floated about
in languorous waltz, until Babs
NHISpSTSus
stop by that door. It's the pan
try, and I've million things to tell
the hired hands about supper. There's
perfectly darling girl over there
who's hardly danced at all and"
Herbert was about to protest when
his eyes met those of the darling
girl.
She was a darling! She looked like
somebody who'd stepped out from a
valentine. Other heads might be
closely cropped, but hers had soft
brown hair parted demurely in the
middle, with alluring little curls that
were held in loose knot at the nape
of an adorably white neck. Other
girls might wear gaudy Charleston
frocks. but she wore a green dress
that fiared widely and almost reached
her dainty ankles. Her cheeks were
flushed and her eyes were bright, but
with chagrin instead of joy, for, in
spite of Philander's loudest com.
mands, she'd been dancing very little.
So shy and sweet was she that she
was lost in this gay riot.
Herbert Warrington bowed low be-
fore her, and, second later, they
were whirling away. Babs completely
forgot them in the multiplicity of
duties that awaited her. Serving sup
per to so large throng with her in
adequate facilities wouldn't have been
possible, If she hadn't cleverly lodged
Evening star., 1927-04-17

don't have to room with him. ari
with that he ordered his fourth lacN
tail.
"And I'm so darned obliging. ho
complained. II can't do anything
with these forcefui guys"
The cocktail arrived and ne drank
it. And shortly after that ! began TO
notice a change. His eye took on
queer, hard CLINT and his mouth
fixed sort OF a smile. And suddenly
he laughed.
You know what In going to do
he said. I'm going to knock the hell
out of that guy"
Hey. look" I warned. Not now
At that moment Mir. Arnold popped
his head into the door.
Come on out, boys he called.
sort of slow
Pennypacker stood up, and In doing
so Knocked off two cocktail glasses.
I'm sorry" no saiu, '-yut YOU see
I've just got to knock the he'll oot o.
that guy" and with that he made a
rush.
/ caught him at me door and "e
burst out together.
mot too fast" coached Mi. A"noi".
standing against the rail and com
pletely engaged in bending ever the
finder OF his clicking camera.
please cried Pennypacler, strus-
Cling to get free Of my arm. Just
let me Soc; him once.
That's great" encouraged MT
Arnold. Now push your hats back
over your eyes and say 'Hic.
Pennypacker twisted free and /
dived for his knees. We went down
together on to the deck. Nsr. Arnold
followed every mcve with the camera.
That's great, boys he repeated,
but little to the left"
Don't do 1t now" ] cried in PENN
packers ear. Watt
please" he urged.
No" | insisted.
"Au right" he said, 'T'l wait"
We got up slowly and brushed o.
our knees. Mr.. Arnold was winding
up his camera.
I'D like II get some close-ups of
that" he said. efficiently. suppose
you could run through it again.?
/ shook my head.
mo" said Not any more today
Another time?" he urged.
/ looked at PennypaclteI. who was
searching blindly around the deck for
/ his steA-rimmed glasses
Yes" I replied, probably another
tCopyriaht. 1927
Evening star., 1927-04-17
Mystery Of a Person in Pink

catch in town, quite the best.lookinE
beau in the community.
When the guests for the second
subscription dance began to arrive on
Saturday evening Babs Bliss retired
to the pantry and had Mysteries.
For three out of every four women,
young, middle-aged, or old, wore pink
Coyly they sauntered in. and hag-
gard-eyed young man watched them
from the alcove and moaned:
mo, no! She hasn't Gomez
At 10 o'clock. Nina Herndon ar
rived with a sullen young person.
MY husbands cousin from the
country" whispered "Nlnny' to Rabs
And such little crouch she has
been all this week! We couldn't get
a smile out OF her, not even about
young Warrington's person in pink
Babs eyed the Crouch" compass
sionately. She felt somehow sorry
an old-fashioned green gown.
"If she'd only smile, she'd be
sweet" thought Babs.
And just that second the girl did
smile: A beatific. radiant, bride-like
smile. For across the ballroom dash
ed young Herbert Warrington, OBJ
livious of everybody save that one
girl!
''You darling" he cried softly. 'G
thought I'd lost you forever. Oh. mi.
gosh, Babs"' he chanted joyfuIly over
her shoulder, we've found her. The
minute / saw this pink dress
Safe in his arms, the girl in the
green dress smiled at Babs as they
drifted away to the tune OF the dear
old "Blue Danube"
But her dress isn't pink Babs
stormed. IT'S the greenest thing
ever saw, and it's the same dress she
wore last week and
Philander stood beside her chuc-
king.
MY mistake!" he acknowledged
Perfectly stupid of me not to have
remembered that young Herby is
color-blind-used to be the joke OF the
communiay few years back. when
we all played mah-jong. He's always
making such blunders-always mis-
taking green for pink, and so on. But.
oh, Babs, look around Almost every.
body but you and that girl is wearing
pink"
Pink with laughter Babs smiled
back at him. His eyes were shining
stars OF happiness.
isn't it heavenly to see folks so IN
love! Could anybody help loving that
darling girl?"
Philander thought Of Mrs. Warning.
ton.
Lets dance he evaded.
Evening star., 1927-04-17

Are your he asks, with brutal
indifference. II didn't notice. Hers
was a. lovely sort of pink" His
voice grew lyric as his words grew
more and more idiotic. And her eyes
-well-T-she-
Babs stopped smiling. Her hand
crept into his.
You dear lamb she promised him.
"Don't look so worried I'll find her
for YOU. I'm the best little sleuth in
Westchester. Wen take a complete
census of everybody here tonight VINO
wore pink, and Wen keep going TIL
we find her.
She honestly tried her best. Con-
sidering that she had sick husband,
two lively babies, a sulky cook, and a
new tearoom on her hands, she was
more than generous in her efforts.
Young Warrington tagged at her
heels, morning, noon and nignt'
while she telephoned everybody she
could think of and tactfully tried 10
get some trace of a girl in pink. And
when she had a clue. away she and
young Warrington would tear in MS
roadster, and every time they'd come
back, with Herbert looking gloomier
and sadder.
The lady of his dreams seemed to
have vanished as completely as Gin.
derella at midnight.
The Struthers girl, furious at this
neglect, left for home. His mother,
a stately lady, watched him with hor-
ror. For never a word did he vouch-
safe to her about his love for q
mysterious charmer in pink, but she
knew that he was all day long at the
heels of the disturbing yqoung matron
who ran the tearoom. Once, when
she made a slightly disparaging re-
mark about young Mrs. Bliss. her son,
who hitherto had been chivalry itself
to her. coolly remarked:
Never say a word about that dear
womani In her lies my only hopep
And he didn't come home for lunch
con and he didn't come home for dim
ner, and his mother wept out her
heart to her friend. Mrs. Philander
Munro Findley.
/ knew Mrs. Bliss was a danger
Gus woman the moment I saw herr
Mrs. Philander was small comfort
Your son is not the only one who
seems positively hypnotized!'
The dreary, funny week dragged
on. BY Saturday night, everybody in
Clairmont's gay young set knew what
Herbert's mother did not know-that
her highly eligible son was in love
with fair unknown who had worn
pink the perYious Saturday night.
He was the biggest matrimonial
Evening star., 1927-04-17
Gross Exaggerations In the Dumb Waiter:
1t Rites Paul Revere on a Huss Hussback
BY MILT GROSS.

~ EEVE leesten mine cheeldren
you'll gonna hear
i Wot pt,,.nly i rilly heppened to Paul
On de haiteent from Hapril
in savanty-fife--
] tink wot de huss is still alife
tOccurding mine race-treck retoins lest
Year,.
x * X x
He sad to his frand, "Dere's no
goot bold
Entitled His Mejesty Judge de Told;
Sotch hideas he gats--wot dey must
be de Quinn's.
But he thinks dees is China and he's
de Marinzz
A welcome Wen geeve heem wots
feet for a keeng.
Far be it from me / should gatting
sorrkestic,
Bot to YAotcha in de Heaster Parate
vat dees Spreeng.
He'll nidd foist a hexpoit from
soigery plestic.
X y *
SO climb by de choich in de belfry-
notch
Sleep me de high-sign so soon wot
dey notch
" c&bAhS II OE II Oisl uE IEENEE aCi uSS
in a seeting position on top of from
a. huss
Snurrting witt prencing mine hubble
bist
From witamines fool like a cake from
yist
De fittings will sprad it should stott
opp de fighting
TO itch fommer brafe we'll distreebute
titing
1Icct like a harrow wen fly from a
bow
Arozzing de countrysite-noo hus, is
nor?
x X X
Steel was de ceety-aslipp was de
pipple
Agog from excitement is Paul witt
de stidd
"Bot Hock.m wot dees?? Boins
iemp in de stipple."
lie exclaims to de huss, Forward
notch. Procedd"'
.
a hopto-date hequine witt avery i'm.
nroofment
A msembleness haglle, plasure TO
Weetness
j. p~ecture 10 itch individual mofe.
Evening star., 1927-04-17
ENTERED SINCSNC, 1905 VARIOUS STATE INSTITUTIONS,
l89S.98; LIFE APPOINTMENT, 1909.

1864; attached very mucL) to moon
shine department of quartermaster's
staff: mentioned In this connection
very warmly in dispatches of
General Lee: mustered out, away out,
of both armies; lost from sight, 1866
1895: placed on pension list with rank
of general. 1885,. has stayed on, 1885,
1927: Obtained I'm 9th Avenue) war
medals and Service clasps. Publica.
tions: Ny Campaigns under Grant:
Battles I HAve Saved; Feeding an
Arn1yh Stuffsng the Public; etc. etc.
Recreations. telling war stories. Fa-
Evening star., 1927-04-17
There Are Some Very Important People
Who Are Left Out of the Books of Fame

| life appointment, 1908; general favor
| ite. musical, has never killed anybody.
GLOOMIE, Dreary O'Leary. Scotch
dialect comedian and humorist; well
known in Scotland; has standing offer
from Duke of Sutherland to put foot
on estate.
MUCK, o. Absolute. novelist: OF
low German extraction; b.. Rotterdam.
Educ, Muckendorf. Escaped 10 Amer
lea; long unrecognized: leaped into
prominence by writing The Social Gas
Pipe. a powerful indictment of modern
society. written in revenge for not
being invited to dinner. Other works:
The Sewerage of the Sea Side. an ar
raignment of Summer society, reflect
ing on some Of his best friends: Vice
and Super-Vice, a telling denunciation
of the New York police. written after
they had arrested him: White Ravens,
an indictment Of the clergy: Black
Crooks. an indictment of the publish
ers, etc, etc. Has arraignei and in
dicted nearly everybody.
WHYNER, Egbert Ethelwind, poet.
at age of Is wrote a quatrain, The
Banquet of NebuchadnezZar. and at
once left school; followed it up in less
than two years by a poem in six lines
America; rested year and than pro.
uuCSu bdIylOUs ~ NlSlOH VI 1INlllBdllOIl,
three lines; has written also Herod
a Tragedy, four lines: Revolt of wo-
man, two lines; and The Day OF
Judgment. one line. Recreation: writ
ing poetry.
ADULT, Hon. Underdone. Ad.
dress: The Shrubbery, Hopton-
Hyde, Rotterdam near Pottersby,
Potts, Hants, Hops, England. Organ.
izer of the Boys League OF Path.
finders: Chief Commissioner OF the In
fant Crusaders; Grand Master OF the
Young Morons; Major General of the
Girl Rangers; Chief of STAFF of the.
Matron Mountain Climbers. etc.
ZEWINSKI, X. T., Polish pianist:
plays all night. Address: 4570 west
457 street. Westside, Chicago West.
tCopyright 1877
Evening star., 1927-04-17

her lack Of dishes by putting the food
into picnic boxes that We're to be
auctioned off by Philander. After the
auction, the fun waxed fast and fu.
rious. All too quickly the orchestra
was playing Good Night, Ladies'"
BY way of thanking Philander for
his kindness to her, Babs was dancing
the last dance with him when they
were interrupted by a distrait young
man.
1--WE lost her, I've looked every.
where for her.
"Whom?'
THAT lovely girl l was dancing
with just before supper! It's your
fault, SIR He whirled wildly upon
Philander. Every time I'd find her
that darned whistle of yours would
blow. and some other chap would
grab her! And we had so much to
talk about that I forgot to ask her
name. After supper she just vanish
Evening star., 1927-04-17
THE OTHER DAY

| you have never been TO Elgin-or
don't play marbles"
My wife regarded me with calm dig
| nifty:
There are more important things
| in life" she said, than knowing
about the Elgin marbles
| well. then, here's an easy one" l
| replied. What is the width OF mar
row garSs railway track?'"
I looked up fronI the book as the
door slammed.
Wait" I called. heres one I'm
sure you know" but she did not
return. I looked through a few more
of the questions, ard then decided to
go up on deck.
did not find my wife in our chairs
But / did find Pennypacker.
Hope you don't mind" he said
apologetically and somewhat shyly.
I'm trying to hide from Arnold"
"Goodi" / agreed.
He's getting up some kind Of a trip
through the ship or something.
mot for me- said, and sat down.
Pennypacker was reading a French
book he had got in the ships library,
and | opened a volume of the tragedy
Unfortunately. it was the second vol
ume, but it didn't seem to make much
difference, and l read quite a bit with
out seeming to get sleepy. / was
awakened, however. by well known
voice.
'Well. we'll, WELL" it said. How $
the newly wed this fine morning"
I opened nay eyes and picked the
book up off the floor.
IAN right. replied. How are
you, Mr.. Arnold?"
20. H." he said. And how's my
young roommate?"
Pennypacker looked up from his
book.
I'm all right" he said quietly.
"Reading?" asked Mr.. Arnold, pick
ing up my book and glancing at the
cover. "How is it? Good?"
Great" / replied.
I'll have to read it" he said.
ANY time" I offered.
Pennypacker had returned to his
book. Mr.. Arnold leaned over and
took it out OF his hands.
Say. boy" he remarked, Whats
this? French? Hot dog" And with
that he looked at me and winked.
Pennypacker said nothing. Arnold
leafed through the book, looking for
pictures, and then returned it to its
owner.
well, boys" he said, "how about
little trip through the ship?"
"When?" / asked.
Right now" he replied. 1--WE got
Evening star., 1927-04-17

vorite amusement, showing war
medals.
COOK, w. Underhand, b., dash;
parents, double dash. educ. Technical
School On graduation turned his
attention TO the problem Of mechan.
icai timelocks and patent safes; On
tered Sing Sing, 1890: resident thsre.
1S90-1S93; Auburn. 1894: threa months:
various state institutions. 1Ss5-1S9S;
worked at profession. 1SsS-18s9; Sing.
Sing. 1900: professional work, 1901;
Sing-Sing. 1902: profession. 1903, Sing-
Sing: profession, Stng-Sing. etc, etc.;
Evening star., 1927-04-17

No--no--I sad Breetish-I deedn't sad
slleetishp'
X y X x -
Bee" like by Benzins.
'Harr" like in Regs
"Hi' for insurance und
"ree" for Tenksgeeving
Hi" for Investigate
Hess like in Sneg and
"Hache" like in Hivves-wot mine
huss here is hivving!
Togadder you'll put dem it spells
Holy Muzzes!
Dey told me dees job was a golden
from ruzzes!.
\ sE y y
Prompt in de monnink arrifed a con-
signment
His Mejesty's suldiers extrimmingly
pompous
A model was itch from a Cockney
refinement
Until it COMMANDED witt de Yenkizz
de rompos
y
Dey shuidered de broomsteecks. binn-
shooters dey ludded
You tutt was a jukk on de Tea our
Emboggo??''
1t few rocks witt stons und tomatiss
Oxpludded.
Evening star., 1927-04-17
BY DONAID OGDEN sTEwART.

~ y. ABOUT the fourth day be-
tween New York and Paris
one is apt to become a little
NJ fed up with the Atlantic
Ocean.
.'Nell, why don't you read book?'
suggested my wife.
II don't feel like reading | replied.
Shs finished rush'ng her suitcase
under the bed on which I was lyins
and. Strengthened up.
tThat's got nothing to do with 1t,
she argued. We were given those
hooks 10 read on the boat and we
aught TO read them"
All Of them / asked.
Certainly" she replied.
I got up slowly and walked over to
the shelf on which the books were
piled
They're mostly novels" | reported,
q little gloomily.
Long novelist" she asked.
] nodded
For instance said, and held out
two volumes about a tragedy.
From Aunt Julia" l explained.
"She must have thought we were
going over in a sailboat," remarked
my wife. What's Textbook likeY
Well / replied, glancing through
the IFSt TWO pages, IL SSelilS " NC
sort of a tragedy"
oh said my wife.
l picked up another.
"A Guide Book to Paris, | read.
That's probably sort of a guide
book" said my wife.
"Yes." l agreed.
There were several more.
This one" announced, is called
Questions
rs it long?" she asked
/ examined the inside of the book.
Its fun Of questions" / replied.
"For example, Who was the Swedish
Nightingale?
"A bird book snorted my wife.
what a funny thing to give US on
our honeymoon
DO you mean to say" / rebuked,
that you don't know who the Swedish
Nightingale was2"
What are some of the other books?"
couutered my wife.
'Then you don't know who the
Swedish Nightingale was?" | insisted.
My wife looked out Of the portfolio.
I've never been to Sweden" she
said, defensiyely.
/ laughed loudly,
"All right" / continued, here's an
other--'What are the Elgin marbles?'
And don't tell me-" ] went on, that
Evening star., 1927-04-17

mahded Mr.. Arnold. I'm going down
and get new reel Of lilnl."
In the ssn oking room Pennypacker
and / sat down and waited.
"Shall we have a drink?" I asked.
Sure" he replied. Anything"
l ordered a double Martini for both
of us. We sat there, more or less in
silence. Pennypacker was always
little shy, and l wasn't surprised that
he didn't seem to want to talk. But
/ was surprised when he ordered mis-
second double Martini, and then his
third.
Not for me-" begged.
Gee, that fellow gets my goat" he
said
II know l agreed, sympatheticaily.
NO, you don't" he said You
Evening star., 1927-04-17

PEECKLES?"-
WITT PFEF'S SHAFTNG GRIM
YOU COULD SHAFE IN A
MEENIT"--
IN BONCE| |EM.OPP'S FLEEVERS
YOU'LL MAYER OPSAT''-
'THOO LOTS FROM CHOONGOM"
-"USE FLIZZEM FOR FLIZZ'-
'JAKES STORE is A WONDER-A
COCK EYED ONE YAT"--
"UND TRY GOGGOLOOL FOR A
CUFF WIT A SNIZZE''--
SLOW DON DE SPEED TO A MA
TURE FROM KENTERING,
LAXINGTON WEELAGE NOW YOU
ARE HENTERING!"'
X x X X
Knock! knock!! by de durrs--it's de
bell hout from horder--
Cat opp everybody inclooting de
boarder.!
Wot suit from beezness I come here
rigodding?
You'll find hout tomorrow whan stotts
de bombodding!.
To seez meelion Radcoats who'll come
wit weesit
You'll yum like q dope dere und esk
dem .WHOOEEZIT??
De Henglish!! De Radcoats!. De Breet-
isha De Breetish!l
Evening star., 1927-04-17

Scra ggly orchard, and listened to a
corking little jazz orchestra. A hun
dred or more guests, none Of whom
knew one another very well, had been
standing about in groups. while few
intimidated souls danced sedately with
intrepid wives, or with women their
wives had picked out for them.
Philander shuddered as he looked
upon this travesty Of joy. He prom.
ised his hostess valiantly:
"Er-wait a few minutes Babs,
and III mix 'eln up for your
All the way back from the Yacht
Club he explained the tense situation
to the young recruits Herbert had
collected.
''She's the best little sport 1 ever
knew. this young Mrs. Bliss. They
haven't a penny in the world, and
young Bliss is still so wobbly from
pneumonia that this afternoon they
he was running temperature again.
Which left her without any er--mas-
ter of ceremonies. until / came along.
She opened this tea-room and started
this series of Saturday night sub.
scription dances, and she's got fair
sized crowd that wants to play and
doesn't know how. If they don't have
some fun this week. they will walk
out on her next time. But it's not
for nothing that was a cotillen lead
er when I was your age. and If you'll
help me"
All of which sounded so philan-
thropic that they would have fed. if
at that opportune moment they had
not caught their first glimpse of Babs
Bliss. She looked so appealingly
pretty in a pink chiffon frock, left
over from a luxurious trousseau, that
each and every one Of them positively
dashed toward her
Philander, grinning broadly, intro
duced them all and then showed them
aside before he entered the ballroom
Easy, my lads" he warned. IT'S
l who viii lead off with this little
lady. and you, the younger and
stronger. who win steer the older and
heavier craftr He paused just long
enough for hasty consultation with
the orchestra leader and then, with
Babs, arm stiIl tucked under his, he
blew a whistle gaily.
Ladies and gentlemen" he called,
Il have the honor of requesting the
members of the fairer sex to station
themselves along the left wall, whilst
you, gentles, take the other side The
young ladies will shut their eyes. the
music will begin, and when the whis.
tie blows, each gallant shall charge