New Britain herald., 1927-05-06
HUMOR FINDS WAY
 ACCOMPANIMENT
Office Holders and Enthusiasts Sometimes Unconsciously Funny


 The strain of governmental duty is often relieved by humorous in- cidents which abound in almost every branch but seldom come to general public attention, yet those who have close application to pub lie life very often have broad stores of anecdotes which are most enter taning.
 Some time ago, in mayoral cam- paign one of the candidates opened with & series of accusations involv- ing alleged practices of his oppo- nents. Prompt denial of the charges came from the opposite camp and on tho following night the candi- date again arose and before large audience repeated his declarations. To emphasize his point and to in- crease interest in the campaign, he shouted: T have the evidence in hlack and white to back up my charges!" He then reached into his coat pocket and drew forth a sheaf of papers which he waved aloft. The audience cheered as it grasped the significance of his action since 1t was an apparent willingness to prove a monetary interest by out side influences desiring control of New Britain's municipal govern ment. As he was about to return the paper to his pocket one flutter- ed to the ground and curious by- stander picked 1t up. It was a bill of lading made out to the speaker for a shipment of goods awaiting him at the freight depot.
 Frank Admission
 A political partisan was drawn into a discussion of two candidates for office in the presence of group of curbstone politicians one night not very long ago. As the man warmed up to his subject he rap idly gained in enthusiasm and lost in diction. Finally he reached the climax and to drive home his ar- gument that his selection was the more jealous of the two toward his public duty, he declared in loud tones: I tell you. gentlemen. my candidate Is after the office for all he can get out of it!'
 A strong Paonessa booster in the last election was conducting an impromptu political rally in a Main street store few days before cleo ton and was using as one of his arguments in behalf of the demo- cratic candidate the fact that his efforts had counted in the elimina- tion of the grade railroad crossing at Clayton. Fearful lest his auditors might not fully grasp the import ance of this project, he launched into detailed story of the crossing, saying:
 "You remember how, for years and years that crossing stood there as a constant danger. Every now and then we read of people being killed outright or maimed. It brought suffering and great losses as long as it existed. l remember very distinctly one case in parttcu- lar: A poor couple accepted an 1nvl- tation to go for an automobile ride with . more fortunate friend. They went and as they were crossing those tracks a train came along and they were killed outright. They were tenants of mine and. do you know, it was three months before I got that tenement rented again. Gentlemen, Clayton crossing was . very bad thing"
 Carrying Two Spare Cylinders
 There Is one story of the early days of motorized city equipment hat has been told and re-told, but rarely fails to bring a laugh, par ticularly in these days of more gen. aral information of automobiles. Under discussion was a plan to pur- chase a piece of apparatus and the bone of contention was whether 8 ur-cylinder car or six-cylinder machine should be had. One mem- her had been listening attentively for several minutes without taking a part in the discussion. but finally he arose and was recognized by the chair. His contribution to the fund of knowledge on the respective merits of four and six-cylinder cars was:
 "Gentlemen, Of course it's all right to have four-cylinder car when YOU can be sure of travel on straight highways. but its mighty handy when you're having a tough pull on a hill to be in a position to throw in those two extra cylin- lers that come with six-cylinder car." In the heat of common council argument members sometimes go a bit astray in their grammar. One member who had leading part in council deliberations was angered somewhat by the insistence of that it's practices were correct in spite of his expressed ob- jections. When the boards repre- sentatives had answered claims made by the councilman. he arose and addressed the chair to make Ihe most unintelligible rejoinder: T don't still change my views now" When he resumed his seat the .ouncil seemed about evenly divid- sd on whether he had agreed or disagreed with the board.
 Pity to Wake Him
 Several years ago the common had under advisement the aising of funds by which to replace m old frame building at the town arm by one that would assure the inmates of fireproof l building in which they might spend he autumn years of their lives. Several financing policies were un- Ter discussion as was also the main 1 question of whether or not the building was an absolute necessity tt that time. One member was at peace with the world safely in the r,,. ~ NYnrphoue fnr greater