Evening star., 1927-08-28
Traffic Officers Duties Hard
So Is the Life of a Driver

iron. Yes, next time-tomorrow after.
noon, in fact--an iron will be tried. So
that's that.
OF a sudden such thoughts are di.
verted into other channels. There is
a tiny noise in the engine. Or is it a
noise? 1t may be just imagination.
which often sounds like. noise.
Leaning over the steering wheel. the
better to investigate, his thoughts are
snatched from under the hood with
sickening suddenness and dumped
down on the curbstone. The citizen
finds himself looking into the scowl-
ing countenance Of a traffic officer.
"Wadja mean by runnin' past them
traffic lights?"
"I-er-I, that is. I was listening to
my engine, officer"
"Listenin' to yer engine? Wadja
suppose them lights was put up there
for--to let yer listen to yer engine?"
mo, sir. The fact of the matter IL.
officer. my attention was distracted
for a moment. l ran past the lights.
l wasn't looking carefully. I'm sorry.
There wasn't any excuse. really. / am
ordinarily a very careful driver"
Careful? Huh! You look careful,
all right. Careful is as careful does.
Lemme see your permit
At this point the heart always has a
tendency to crowd the tonsils. Was
the thing at home? Was it in that
other suit that went to the presser
this morning? Ah, here it is!
~
The officer takes the card and sub
jects it to a close scrutiny, now hold
ing it close to his eyes, now at arms
length. One expects him to smell it,
perhaps taste it. and maybe hold 1t
to his ear. in the hope that it will
tick. The examination is lengthy.
This permits no good.'
why isn't it? l bought it two
months ago. 1 thought they would
| last that long"
You amt countersigned it."
oh, l beg your pardon, Have you
got pencil? I'll sign it right here"
ut says here it amt no good unless
it's countersigned. You think the
po-ieece force is to carry pencils
around with them so you guys can
sign your permits? That's the trouble
with you guys-you never read moth.
ing. You don't read the signs; you
don't read directions; you don't read
the lights; you don't read nothing"
I'm sorry. I'll sign it as soon as
get home"
Eyes, and you'd better! What's the
color of your hair?"
why. guess it's sort of a brown"
Brown? Your hair amt brown.
Your hairs gray-gray and thin. This
permit says brown. but your hair
amt brown. Is this here your own
permit"
Yes. sir"
Nov. look at my hair. My hairs
brown taking off his cap and running
his fingers through IT.. Yes, my
hairs brown"
II don't call your hair brown.
call it red
You what?"
eyes, 1t is sort of brown-reddish
brown, that is. Very fine hair"
'Listenin' to yer engine, was yer?''
"Yes."
well, next time you come down
this street listenin' to yer engine I'm
gonna run We in. see? You'd ought to
be run in now. How many times you
been arrested for violating the traffic
regulations? You're supposed to use
your eyes on this street, not your ears.
Amt color blind, are yer? What's
the color OF that light there now?"
Green"
And green means go. Beat itm
And that, it is here maintained, is
neither according to the police man.
ual, it is not conducive to respect for
law and order, nor is it the attitude
to be taken by a public official toward
meek citizen. The Police Depart-
ment might do we'll to adopt a stereo-
typed lexicon for its routine dealing
with the citizenry. something on the
order of the telephone operators.
In the present case the depart.
ment's reply to this criticism could
only be "Excusit, please"