Douglas daily dispatch., 1927-06-10
PIucked From the Plains

PIucked From the Plains
Mixed His Cues
Bob jerks upon his wedding day
| Was a most excited creature
He handed his bride the marriage fee
And tried to kiss the preacher.
Boston Transcript
Angry Father: Young lady explain
! yourself. Where have YOU been all
night?
| Flappcr Daughter Sitting up daddy
with the sick son 2t the sick man
I you are always telling mother you
sat up wlrh.
First Man: Is your wife economi-
cal?
Second Man: Well, she is wearing
less hair and fewer clothes, but
can't see as my expenses are any
less.
A man is j creature who will spot
a sEapely ankle three blocks away
while driving an automobile in a
crowded city street, but who will fail
TO notice in open country a loconno-.
I tive as big as house accompanied
by g lock OF 1orty box cars
Irate Parent My boy, 1 hear you
have been most recalcitrant.
| Boy: Pull yourself together, dad
You've been at those cross word puz-
zles again.
/ Host ito small boy): What part OF
the turkey do you prefer Bobby?
Bobby (passing his plate tinidiy>:
like the meat.
Deadly Decoration
Radiator caps should be more
artistic. The caps prominent fea-
! ture"
"Yes, it's about the first thing that
strikes you. u.'-American Boy.
He: We're coming to a tunnel, are
you afraid?
She: Not if you take that cigar our
Of your mouth.
Marie: I hear you got mad at Jack
on Decoration Day; wnat did he do?
Ruth: Nothing, that's what made
Ine mad.
Polite Youth: You acted awfully
well.
She: The audience didn't applaud
a bit when 7 went off the stage
Polite Youth; Oh but I'm sure
they were awfully pleased.
Billy: My family is bettern yours,
we had forefathers, we did.
Bobby: Silucks, that's nothing! MY
aul1t's had four husbands
Poor Scenario
! "NIy objection to real life" says
the heroine OF a Scotch novel, is
that it isna true to the moving pic,
tme. Boston Transcript.
| Sweet Harmony
| Loving models are used by mem
bers of the o. A. e. Art club ut their
Tuesday night meetings. Oregon
Agricultural College Daily Barometer.
| CCACS HIS UN IOuT HTATEOT
Marriage is that part Of a g1rI's life
that comes between the lipstick ana
the broornstick.-Alva (Okla.) Daily
Review Courier
| Aerial LaundresS
| A small fire on Friday at 423 East
Gordon street was caused by sparks
from the chimney, occasioned by a
colored woman Who was ironing
clothes, falling on the roof.--Georgia
! paper
What O'Clock, Please
| Engineers surveying for a railroad
in northern Turkestan have uncov-
cred the skeleton Of a massive saur-
ian that must have passed; away 3,-
100000 years ago last FHiday.-Los
Angeles Times
Office Etiquette
You were speaking much too long
on the phone just now Miss Ponson-
by"
But it was business call. Mr..
Jones'"
We'll, please don't address any of
our clients as 'sweetiKins' in future!v
london Opinion.
New Brand
Two hundred dollars and costs and
three months in county jail was the
sentence handed Monroe - by
Judge Edward l. Gleszer in the nlunl-
cipal court here today on a charge
Ct operating an automobile while unz
der the influence OF liquor-Portland
>Me.) paper.
Plays No FavOriteS
Denominational cooperation as
eXelnplified in Excelsior Springs is
lelated thus in The Standard:
Glen w. Reed, Excelsior Springs
foremost lyric tenor will sing in the
mass at the Catholic church Sunday
morning, in the Methodist church in