The daily worker. [volume] (Chicago, Ill.) 1924-1958, 1927-03-19
THE LAST MAN.
An Epic of the Advertising Age.

An Epic of the Advertising Age.
Jones a sensible man. maybe touched by sophis-
tcation. He looked down upon the rabbe He despised
their ways and their tastes. He sneered at their
creduty. And he had good enough reason for his SUI
peror attitude for he advertisements for living
Naturally he considered himself immune to their influ
ence.
One morning over his breakfast it occurred to him
just that four out of every five have pyorrhea
silly thought and there reason why he should
think 1T. Then he laughed Laughed out loud though
he actor stage He recalled that it not
thought at a-merey the echo of of those silly
advertisements So he turned to his newspaper relieved
But almost the first that struck him. in large bold
type, that four out of five have pyorrhea! This
time ne only smiled The thing was distinctly annoying
Later he stepped to the street great sign rushed
tomeet him. For moment he was dazed, it came upon
him so suddenly 1t seemed to shout at him, and the
words it shouted Four out of every five etc. BY
this time quite angry Jones rushed into subway kiosk
and soon he was damned into He could turn
neither to right to left He could not so much as
his head. And facing him in this Imprisonment
was car sign which told him that four out of five, etc.
After luncheon that day Jones went to the cracked
mirror over the washbasn in his office He went with
sense of guilt. Making that looking he
opened his mouth wide and studied his teeth shudder
passed through him. Could it be? He unable to
work that afternoon, to eat his dinner, to sleep
wink. And next morning he went to dentist
He issued forth more calm. He not of the four
He the lucky fifth. Strange is it not Jones re-
Elected, that on four to chance he should win!
Had the tale remained at that point we should have
nothing more than happy ending But luckily for
literary principles that far from the end. 1t
indeed only the beginning Shortly after this episode
Jones learned that nine out of every ten have rachoma
He received the with a sinking feeling. At first
he tried to laugh off, but gradually got the better
of him. Since it could do harm to consult optcan
he decided to do So
This time he really astonished He was the tenth
man! Nine must suffer in order that he Jones' might
be well. 1t seemed almost miraculous The more he
thought of it the stranger appeared He was even
little frightened Why had fate singled him out for such
attention? Why should he of all men be the fifth in
five and the tenth every ten? He began to wish
that might be otherwise, that he might be more nor
NAL, closer to the run of his feow-men.
Subsequently realizing that ninetynne out of every
hundred suffer with form of anema he felt reas
sured At last he would find point of contact with the
rest of mankind There only one chance in hun
the physicians though he coaxed and pleaded would not
dred that he might not But his unspeakable sorrow
confess to the least faint of anemia in his system!
1t at that point that the gruesome truth came to
him. He understood now that he not like Others
could never be like others He doomed for ever and
to be the Last Man In every group every class he
was the exception Scared out of his wits poor Jones
Dega1pto test this truth. And it always worked What
nine SO 500 of his fellows did or suffered il
his fate to be the 10th or Tooth or 1OO0h who did
otherwise and suffered not at ALL
Such isolation intoerable. The sense of being
the chosen of the gods-of being in some wav resnon
sibe for the ills of otherswas too heavy burden for
tmid and modest man. And wherever he looked were
the advertisements to remind him of his cruel lot His
days became long drawn anguish
Finally he could stand it no longer He decided To
end it ALL That he knew would prove easy Had he not
heard that 80 out Of every 100 suicides do not succeed
Did he not know it as fact that out of 10 revovers
miss fire? For being the last man was useful to
Jones' He felt that he would be the Tooth whose suicide
did succeed and the 10th whose revolver did work.
And he was. The ease with which it took place was
the final proof of his tragic fate