davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Evening star., 1927-04-17

w YHEN young Herbert War
n 1 rington came home from
Nv his senior year at college
for the Easter holidays, he
did so most reluctantly.
For he was aware that his fond mama
and his doting papa expected him TO
become engaged TO the girl OF their
choice, young person named Mabel
Struthers, who seemed to him about
as exciting as a last years necktie.
She was not hard to look at and she
was rather easy. to talk to, and she
did very nicely all of the things that
the girls in his set were supposed to
do. Herby didn't have thing against
her. and yet-well, as he stood in the
coat room during the Yacht Club
dance pulling at his beautiful new
mustache, he felt like a man con-
demned to life Imprisonment. He posi-
lively glared at a genial old soul who
hustled in crying:
'"Pon my soul, Herby! You're ex-
actly the lad I'm looking for! That
fs--if-er--if--you came stag"
Ordinarily Herbert thought the
genial old soul bally old bore, but
tonight he welcomed any distraction.
stag" he murmured. for the
Struthers girl was his mothers house
guest and he had walked hither.
rather than Chamber into the family
limousine with her.
"Can you find half-dozen more
chaps who didn't bring gals?''
Herbert considered the stodgy stu.
pidity of the usual Easter dance at
the Yacht Club, and said cautiously.
IF it's for something good
The genial soul, to whom the local
paper always referred as the Honor.
able Philander Munro FindIey, chuck
led:
"Herby, go get your bonnet and
your shawl and your pals, for I am
about to lead you to something better
than good
Philander was rather a traitor to
his own old, exclusive set tonight
But there were reasons. About half
an hour before, he had felt soft lit.
tie hand on his sleeve and heard a
piteous voice murmur:
''Oh, Philly. it's not going to go.
And worked so hard. They just
won't mix. and there are seven women
too many.'
Philander could see all the visible
nlakings Of a party, when he stood
in the doorway OF the beautiful old
Bliss mansion and looked upon two
beautiful drawing rooms banked with
apple blossoms pillaged from the
Evening star., 1927-04-17

ed--you know the one" He turned
to Babs. Il was dancing with you
Just before / found her and
Babs was all sympathy. but her
lips We're twitching with smiles. Con-
sidering that she had had SO many
things to worry about that night, it
wasn't queer that she didn't have a
very clear idea about the girl.
In fact, everything about the eve
ming except that 1t had been a sue.
cess, seemed hazy to her.
Cant you tell me what she looked
like?"
"She is perfectly beautiful" young
Warrington began solemnly.
Philander had the bad taste to
laugh.
'She is.'' Herbert glared at him and
turned toward sympathy.
about your height"
This time it was Babs who laughed.
IT do wish / knew why it is,' she
Evening star., 1927-04-17

murmured plaintively, that every
man always tells every woman that
the other woman he is talking about
is just about her height"
Herbert was plain mad now.
This is important, I must know
right away! For she told me she was
only visiting in Clairmont for a short
timer
But there We're at least II visitors
here tonight" Babs gasped. Every
body has visitors during the Easter
holidays"
Her hair is just little curly and
she had the sweetest way of looking
up at you and she's absolutely diff
ferent from the rest"
What did she wear?" Babs began
a practical QUESTIONABLE.
Pink" he said reverently.
''Lawsy me!" Babs informed him.
Almost half the womeH here were
wearing pink! I'm wearing pink my.
self!''
Evening star., 1927-04-17

Sotch furr-foot examples from pheez.
ical feetness!
Wot it hooted de howl in be brenches
OoHoo!!
Could diss be a huss or kengaroo??
X X =
Fife thousand fit abuff level from
wodder
Acruss from kenyon a tight rope rey
streddle
Kidding copy from "Hesk Me An
nodder"
1t stends yat Revere on his head
IN de seddle.
X x X
Sd Paul to de Huss, 'You enjoying
de sinnery?
Geeve a leesten I got hidea opp
mine slivve
Watch goot de signs we should pess-
ing a binneryr
eating hongry," sad Dobbin. "I
gotcha Stivve!''
* = y
1t stands dere q sign-"MOIPHYS s
HUNDERWEAR TEECKLES''-
USE GOOFUS SNEPPERS IN.
STAT you SHOULD PEEN
TAKE HERE FREE HAIR
"HEV YOU AVER TRITE
Evening star., 1927-04-17


year--the torrid period of the
Il middle.Summer when all the
Who's Who's and the Personal
Guide Books are put together. Why
this is, I do not know. Perhaps il is
easier to tell the truth about people
when they are out of town or off to
Europe.
At any rate, the opportunity is ripe
for offering to the editors of these
books a few suggestions in regard to
some of the very important, or at any
rate the typical, people of our day
whom they consistently leave out. /
would like, therefore. to offer for in
sertion in the new editions the follow.
ing supplement of names:
SMITH, John-Born. Smithvihe
Q680); educated, the school, Smith.
vile, and afterward at the smith
vile Academy. Smithville: entered
business on Smith Street in Smith
Vile $1,000: failed 1e02); started again
Q903), failed again Q904); moved to
North Smithville (suburb) in 1906;
failed, 1908; retired, 1909: lived on his
mother, 1909--1927.
X * X
HAYMOW William-~American agri.
and horti-culturist: born on an Indiana
homestead Q865); lived on the~home-
stead, 1SB5-1927; still on the home.
stead, 1927; recreation. being on the
homestead; club, the homestead.
FLINTLOCk, J. Percussion, aged
81; war veteran and pensioner; b.,
blank. Educ. blank. At outbreak OF
civil War sprang to arms; both sides:
sprang Union first: entered beef con.
tract department OF army OF u. S.;
fought at Chicago, Omaha, and lead
ing tbee0 centers of operation during
the thickest OF the beef conflict: was
under Hancock, Burnside, Meade, and
Grant; fought with all Of them.
mentioned very strongly by all of
them: entered Confederate Service,
Evening star., 1927-04-17

'''Yi, vi yir' sad de Brettish. "Dees
must be Chicoggo!."
It naver befurr used a harmy sotch
tectis
Dey trite on dem hall tings-axcapt
chiroprectis
How 1t deed ii de Yenkizz rimmains
yat a messtery--
I Bot 1t stends irregodd1ess de fects
in de Heestoryl
tCopyright. 1871
Evening star., 1927-04-17

"Well' said Mr.. Arnold, II can call
it off until this afternoon. But be
sure and do it. And. oh, say, there's
Evening star., 1927-04-17

4 wireless equipment, which Co.
cludes earphones e each patients
bed and loud speakers In al star
rooms, has been installed at viotorl9
Infrmary. glasgow,
Evening star., 1927-04-17

There's Truth in That.
Scientists say mosquitoes weep. Is
1t true?"
Probably: have sean moth boil
Evening star., 1927-04-17
BY STEPHEN LEACOCK.

~ EOPLE in the book trade know
that it will soon be the time of |
year---the torrid period of the |
middle.Summer when all the |
Evening star., 1927-04-17

. \. ABOUT the fourth day be-
tween New York and Paris
one is apt to become little
\ = fed up with the Atlantic
Evening star., 1927-04-17
By LUCILLE VAN sLYkE.

w YHEN young Herbert War
n rington came home from
NN his senior year at college
for the Easter holidays, he
did 60 innnsf rallIcfantl
The Butler County press. [volume] (Hamilton, Ohio) 1900-1946, 1927-09-02
FOXY COMMUNISTS
Find Easy Sailing in Trick.
ing Emotional Folk

Communists who direct that move
ment find green pasture among per-
sons who are swayed by emotion
rather than by reason.
This element considers the "reds''
merely advanced thinkers" like them
selves, but who, because of their en-
thusiasm, are inclined to be destruc-
tive, rather than constructive.
The communists despise this ignor-
ance and desnise these liberals. "Sen-
timentalists," the "reds" secretly
sneer between themselves, while open
ly applauding an oozy, wishy-washy
intellectualism that is moved by catch
phrases.
The communists frankly favor de-
structive philosophy, but their tactics
vary according to the group they deal
with. Their changed attitude in the
trade unions-unless they believe
themselves strong enough to show
their teeth--illustrates this point.
The simon-pure communist - not
the band-wagon kind--stand for the
destruction of the present order-its
industrial and political systems, its
morals and its ethics. Everything now
considered sacred between man and
man is "bourgeoise morality" No
rule OF combat must stand in the way
of revolution that will place the fu-
ture society in the hands Of self
imposed few.
Communists who work behind the
scenes are skilled psychologists-the
know how crowds can be moved. This
knowledge of mass psychology is
their stock in trade to secure dona-
tions for the few who will order the
revolution.
Then the cry "All power to the
workers" will be raised, as in Russia.
The Butler County press. [volume] (Hamilton, Ohio) 1900-1946, 1927-09-02

This war whoop is considered too
sacred for ordinary propaganda. 1t
must not be used by soap-boxers dur
ing the agitation period. When the
workers are regimented and disciplined
to the point where they obey COM
mands, and economic and political
conditions warrant, the order will be
given.
While communists hate organized
labor, which is expressed through at
tacks on union officials, they have a
contempt for the so-called liberal, who
does not understand the communists
purposes and tactics. The trade
union official does. The liberal wants
the "reds" to be constructive. He does
not know that this is the last thing
the "reds" favor.
The communist stands for revolu-
ton. Not political change-a revolu-
ton in every sense of the word
economics, politics, morality, ethics,
systems, methods, principles and
deep-fxed dogmas.
These, together with the trade
unions, are "adjuncts of the exploiting
class" and must be uprooted and
overthrown, saith the communists in
their inner circles.
Publicly they assume condescend-
ing pose before the milk-and- d-water
intellectual, who can be used to Gre
ate favorable public opinion and con-
tribute literally whenever the "reds"
run afoul of the law.
If these liberals understood COM
munism they would be terrified.
They would not attempt to change
leopard's spots by pleading that
the "reds" be less destructive.
The Butler County press. [volume] (Hamilton, Ohio) 1900-1946, 1927-09-02
INJUNCTION
Only Applies to Labor
Other Citizens Always
Immune

| Organized labor seeks no immun-
ity from the law, but insists that that
which is lawful when done by other
persons shall not be regarded as un-
lawful when done by wage earners,
either as individuals or in association
We demand that the common law
practice shall apply to wage earners
as well as to all others; that is, that
no injunction shall be issued wherever
there is another remedy provided by
| law.
Our fellow workers or our move
ment are not law breakers; but if any
one be guilty of a crime, the law pro-
vides for his apprehension, trial and
punishment.
There never yet has been issued an
injunction prohibiting crime. The
injunction in a labor dispute is de-
vised to accomplish that for which
there is no law, to prevent the doing
of that which is no crime It's pur-
pose is to interfere with wage earners
exercising legal and moral rights.
/ The writ of injunction was intended
for the protection of property rights
only.
He who would seek its aid must
come into court with clean hands.
There must be no other adequate
remedy at law.
1t must never be used to curtail
personal rights.
1t must not be used in an effort to
punish crime.
1t must not be used as means to
set aside trial by jury.
lnjunctions against workers are
never issued against any other citizen.
1t is an attempt to deprive citizens,
when these citizens are wage work
ers, of the right of trial by jury.
We protest against discrimination
against wage workers which deprives
them of their constitutional guarantee
of equality before the lava. F. of
l.. convention declaration.
The Butler County press. [volume] (Hamilton, Ohio) 1900-1946, 1927-09-02
STRANGER.

Tell me what you eat and | will
tell you what you are" sings out the
philosopher. Does he mean by this
that if woman eats eggs she is an
old hen, that if she eats prunes she
is peach, that if man eats fish he
is sucker, that if he eats sausage
ne must be gay dog, or that if he
eats lobster he is one? No, no.
Call girl chick and she smiles;
call woman hen and she howls.
Call young woman witch and she
is pleased; call an old woman witch
and she is indignant Call a girl a
kitten and she rather likes it; call a
woman cat and she hates you. Wom-
en- are queer
If you call a man a gay dog it will
The Butler County press. [volume] (Hamilton, Ohio) 1900-1946, 1927-09-02

When the "open shoppers" lay
siege to shop or craft their plan of
campaign is to reduce the members
thereof to starvation and later en-
slave them. The only permanent line
of supply for the besieged is UNION
LABEL protection.
The Butler County press. [volume] (Hamilton, Ohio) 1900-1946, 1927-09-02

being called bull or bear, yet he
will object to being mentioned as a
calf or cub. Men are queer, too.
The Butler County press. [volume] (Hamilton, Ohio) 1900-1946, 1927-09-02

iatter him; call him a pup, a hound
or cur and he will try to alter the
map of your face. He doesn't mind
The Butler County press. [volume] (Hamilton, Ohio) 1900-1946, 1927-09-02

Wife (tearfully)-Golf! It's moth
ing but golf with you! Pm going
straight home to mother!
Evening star., 1927-04-03
TILDEN AND ALFONSO
TO VISIT TOMORROW

DR.. l.. w. Glazebrook, once a star
racket wielder Of the District and now
a member of the executive board Of
the National Lawn Tennis Associa-
ton, will referee the Tilden-Alonzo
tennis matches at the Arcadia tomor-
row night.
DR.. GlaZebFook. who has refereed
most of the important matches here,
claims the distinction of laying out the
first tennis court in the Old Dominion,
while attending the University of Nir-
ginia, in 1883. He and several other
students built the court after their
interest was aroused by IAN English
man. The rackets used then were
almost triangular in shape, he re-
calls.
The local physician-tennis enthusi-
ast--says the greatest tennis he has
ever seen displayed was presented by
Mclaughlin, when he defeated Brooks
and Wilding, Australian stars, on
succeeding days, some years ago. Til
den and Alonzo are both beautiful
players DR.. Glazebrook says.
Big Bill and Alonzo will furnish the
feature number of the tennis pro-
gram in singles match There will
be a doubles clash.
Evening star., 1927-04-03
PAIR OF DIXIE TRACK
RECORDS ARE BROKEN

CHAPEL HILL. N. C., April 2 (H1.-
Two southern Conference and one
state record were broken here today,
when North Carolina defeated the
track team Of Virginia Polytechnic
institute, 50 To 81
Pritchett of Carolina turned in the
outstanding feat of the day, when he
led a fast field home in the twomife
race In minutes and so seconds,
breaking the Southern Conference
record by more than seconds. At
the finish he was more than 200 yards
ahead of the second man
The discus was hurled 14i feetsl0M
inches BY Lund of Y. F.. L., which
bettered his own conference record by
nearly 6 feet.
Elliott Of Carolina broke the State
record two-tenths of a second by.
traversing the half-mile In minutes
fiat.
Sandlin of Carolina was high scorer
with II points garnered by taking first
place in the broad jump and jayelin
throw and third place in low hurdles.
Capt. Dan Montague Of v. r. !. was
second. winning both dashes.
Evening star., 1927-04-03
CARAVAN CLUBMEN
TO HONOR JOHNSON


Walter Johnson, famous veteran
pitcher of the Nationals, wilt be tend
cred testimonial luncheon by the
Caravan Club of Almas Temple, local
Shrine. at the Raleigh, Friday at 12:30
O'Clock, it was announced last night.
A committee of the club which is
arranging the luncheon yesterday
visited the Smoke Ball King" at his
home at Alta Vista. Md, to which he
was invalided couple of weeks ago
from Tampa. Fla, the Nationals
training base, to permit the healing
of small bone in his ankle, which
was broken during practice. DIR.
Edward Larkin. the local clubs ply
sician. gave johnson permission to
attend the luncheon. 1t will be his
first public appearance since his ar
rival here from Tampa.
The luncheon committee includes
Maj. Gen. Amos a. Fries. potentate
OF Alnnas Temple; Henry C. Stein.
president of the Caravan Club; Rufus
Pearson, Mai. Howard Kutler Past
Potentate Charles Shaekleford and
Oscar A. G. Oehmler.
Evening star., 1927-04-03
OPENING HLJRLERS PICKED
BY BIG LEAGUE MANAGERS

to earn his money and the former
Yankee is in asreceptive mood TO 10.
the first pitching of the year for Dan
Howley. Earl Whitehill, southpaw.
has an edge in Detroit calculations
for the day,
John J. McGraw has made no an.
nouncement. but Burleigh Grimes Is
being prepared for some game and il
may be the first. 1t would not be sur.
prising to see Grover Cleveland Alex
ander start the season for the Careii
mails. He is equal to it after his
busiest Spring in years,
All the Brooklyn pitchers are in
shape and Wilbert Robinson can draw
name out of a hat if he chooses.
with DaZzy Vance a likely selection.
The same situation applies TO the Cin-
cinnati Reds. with Pete Donahue the
probable choice.
The Philadelphia Nationals will he
represented by Carlson. their ace, and
the Chicago Cubs may choose be-
tween Guy Bush and Charlie Root,
The Pirates may warm up both Ray
Kremer and Lee Meadows. but Bos-
tons choice is. likely to I've Elmer
Hearn. ready now.
Evening star., 1927-04-03
PILOTS THIS YEAR DECLINE
TO BECOME ENTHUSIASTIC
Even Connie Mack Will Only Admit Il Think We
Have Pitching''-''We Have the Goods Says
Griff, ''But Who Mailed Me That Black Hand.''

yoGr kiddin me- he replied Stuffy
MeInnis was asked what he thought
Of the Phillies this year. I'm Young
and shy" was the reply. Give me
time to get aCclimated"
Take Washington. Clark Griffith
thought he had a fair team in 1926.
wen make a come back" no said
after Washington had been licked in
the 1925 world series. But the come.
back back-fred. This year he was
sure that he was in the thick of the
custard pie two weeks ago. and since
then the jinx has swept down and
hunged up almost all of his players,
including Walter Johnson.
The goods are there" Griffith saws,
but who mailed me that black hand .
Davy Bancroft hoped for good for
tune for the Boston Braves I'm 1926.
and Davy is patient this year and
still is hoping for good fortune
Uncle Wilbert Robinson thought he
had a working team in 1926. This
Spring the Brooklyn pilot fatty an
nounced to the wide world that he
has rotten team as team. There
are spots in It that are covered with
jelly and others where acid has eaten
through
The leader of the St Louis Browns
in 1926 was George Sisler. He almost
btdSiiCl WtEu any one dShcu NM
about his team. This year Dan How
ley is the prophet. Says Dan. If /
get a good team out of the Browns
in three years | shall have done some
thing. But, maybe fate will help me
a little this year
Iris Speaker did not pin his faith to-
a pennant i'm the Spring of 1926. he
cause he did not know what his play
efs might bring forth, He did pin n
lot TO the pitchers, and they carse
through for him. Jack McCallister,
who runs things now for Cleveland,
has all the anxiety of a manager who
is in for the first time.
Seeks FOur-Leaf Glover.
II spend all my spare time looking
for four-leaf clover" said Jack
That's all / have to say about a pen
nant."
Il have been a member of a pen
nant team and would be glad TO re-
join the lodge said Ray Schalk of the
Chicago Americans. Darn it, if so
much hadn't happened"
II used to ack other managers
what they thought of their pennant
chances" said George Moriarty Of De.
troit. Gee, I know now how it pulled
their teeth. I've got good ball club
just the same"
Il said that we had little hone when
| started with the Cubs in 1926. and
since then I've been picking hope out
of every bush / could find. and I've
got a lot of it for 1921" Joe McCar-r
thy. a rank progressive, voiced that
for the Chicago Cubs.
Pennant?" said Donnie Bush. the
Pittsburgh pilot Il am so much in
admiration of my team of ball players
that | can't find room in my mouth
9th 1es & Il
nant in my first year in the National
League, I'd go home and hang my
parlor with horeshoes in gilt frames.
tCopyright. 1927
Evening star., 1927-04-03
FINAL GAME TODAY
IN SOCCER LEAGUE

So far as the Washington Soccer
League is concerned activities for the
season close this afternoon when Amer
lean and Scotch teams, picked from
the circuits personnel, clash at Rose
dale playground in a match for the
circuits international title: Play
starts at $50 o'clock.
However. q few exhibition games
will be played by teams of the league
before they hang up their togs until
next September.
Concord Club travels to Baltimore
today to engage Wingfoot hooters. the
champion W'alford eleven will face
picked team here next Sunday, and
on April II German-American players
viii entertain here two teams from
Germania Club of New York. f4sf
American kickers won their way 10
to0ay's final in the interna tional title
series by defeating Germany's stand
ard bearers and the Scotch elSickefS
brushed aside the British twelves
Lineup of the American team viii
be picked from G., Buck, Ningate,
Fey. Suit, Nichols. NJ. F.,and @.
Wyvill. Wilson, O'Connor. Irvingsg Nc
1ntyre, Parker and Tomagni sr
The Scotch will take the field with
this combination; announces Manager
John Macbeth; NJ. Grieve, W. .Grav-
ford. H. Wilisie. T. Blanch, G. and r.
Faulds, J. Malloch, d. Hodge, d, Mac
Lean II. Dryden and e. Bruce.
During the Summer the Washing
ton and District Soccer Association,
the newly formed body, which con
trols the sport here and in Nirgillia.
under supervision of the United States
Foot Ball Association, will prepare .
conduct next Fall three leagues in adj
dition to the Washington Soccer
League. The sport also will he Iwo-
NOTED in Virginia by the local. asso-
citation. which meets Wednesday In
the District Building.
Evening star., 1927-04-03
PINEHURST GOLFERS
BEAT FLORIDA TEAM
BY the Associated Press.

BY inc Associated Press.
P1NEHURST. N. c., April 2.-Pine.
hurst golfers won the sixth annual
team match against Florida for the
sixth consecutive time here this after.
noon by a score of IA to Z. Among
the victorious pairs was Parker w
Whittemore of Boston and Richard A.
Jones of New York, former junior
metropolitan champion. who defeated
John Dawson and Ira Couch, who
played from Belleaire, Fla, 2 up
Whittemore's score was 20, with 13
one-putt greens.
Gardiner White, former amateur
champion of the metropolitan district,
and William c. F'ownes, jr., Pitts
burgh, former national champion and
now United States Golf Association
president, won 2 points for Pine
ran, Palm Beach and Fred knight,
Belleaire. former North and South
champion, ] mp.
Ben Stevenson. Miami. and Robert
Harlow, Pasadena. won from r. L.
Scofield, New York. and Donald Par.
son, Pinehurst, | up, while George
Voigt. Palm Beach, and Robert
Stranahan, Belleaire scored points
for Florida against Eugene Homans,
Englewood. y. j., and George Dunlap,
New York
Other results were.
Richard Tufts. Finehurst. and Phil.
lips F'inlay. New York 2l2 points for
Pinehurst against Dwight Meigs
Augusta. and ID. n. Tallman, Belle.
aire, who made Il point; Austin H..
Sands. New York, and Robert Morri-
son. Pittsburgh. made points for
Pinehurst against A. g. jerks and r.
J. Francisco, Belleaire. who made no
points.
j. D. Chapman, Greenwich. Conn,
and Halbert J. Blue. Aberdeen, N. c.,
scored 3 points for Pinehurst against
A. +. Ranney and Erie Thompson,
Augusta. who made no points.
Evening star., 1927-04-03
MACkS DEFEAT PILLS
BY RALLY IN EIGHTH

PHILADELPHIA, April CP).--
Branon. new first baseman, supplied
the punch that gave the Philadelphia
Athletics victory today in the first
game Of the city series with the Phila-
delphia Nationals. to /.
The Phillies scored run in the
first inning on Baldwin's double,
Gray's wild pitch and Williams sin.
gle, and held the American Leaguers
scoreless until the eighth inning,
when the Athletics made all their runs
With two out. Eddie Collins singled.
Baldwin booted Ty Cobb's grounder.
and Simmons walked. filing the bases
French singled scoring Collins with
the tying run, and then Cobb and Sim
mons scored on Branons single to
center.
Cobb got one hit out of four
times up.
Rain fell throughout the game.