The daily worker. [volume] (Chicago, Ill.) 1924-1958, 1927-11-11
Red Rays

| MIX. Haley Fiske, president of the
AVA Metropolitan Life Insurance Com
| pany, may consider the advisability
of establishing scientific Institutes of
dentistry to take care of his policy
holders teeth, at reasonable profit,
says Arthur Brisbane. Thus Fiske
would kill two birds with one stone.
! The company would make a profit on
the business of keeping teeth in order
and would also contribute to the
longevity of those whose teeth were
fixed, thus insuring more premiums
for the Metropolitan. Whenever a
capitalist essays philanthropic
move it is reasonable to assume that
there is nickel under the heel.
HERE is another typical Brisbane
AZ ism: 1.-TWO aviators in the Ameri-
can marine service were murdered in
Nicaragua when their machine made
a forced landing-killed by a crowd of
twenty to one, after desperate fight
ing. This is the sort of things that
starts wars. The killing of one man,
the Austrian heir apparent, was the
spark that started the big war. No
war will start this time, because
Nicaragua is too small. An elephant
can't fight chipmunk. And besides
the government of Nicaragua had
nothing to do with it." What a faker
this man Brisbane is? Everybody
knows that this elephant" of ours
has been fighting the Nicaraguan
chlpmunk for months and is at war
with Nicaragua as surely as Germany
was at war with Belgium from 1914
to 1917.
ERE is pastor after my own
heart. Even tho he may not save
many souls from the devil, he is all
most sure to have good time at his
business. He is the Rev. j. B. Ennis.
pastor of the Gainesville Methodist
Congregation of Perry, N. Y. The
Rev Ennis noticed that many of his
followers had left the fold, so he put
the following advertisement in the
local newspapers; "Lost Strayed Or
Stolen-A large flock of the Metho-
dist sheep. They have been gone for
some time. When last seen thew were
browsing along the Road of Indiffer-
ence. Anybody finding these sheep
please bring them home, if possible
and you will receive ample reward.
II they refuse to come home drive
them into the nearest fold and lock
the door and report to the under
signed. Rev. J. B. Ennis. Plenty of
fodder will be provided Sunday"
AUGUST HECKSCHER, the noted
- philanthropist, has agreed to pay
Frieda Hempel, the operate soprano,
S25O,000, following suit by the said
Frleda for breach of contract against
Heckscher, who had contracted to paw
the diva $4,000 year for the rest
OF her life provided she did not do
any more "divaing" for cash. 1t an
pears that the millionaire came to his
senses some time after he made the
promise, but the diva was always
there. Why should she strain her ton
sils bowling at an audience when a
big ticker and tape man was willing
to keep her in chow, for little soft
grooming to order?
SENATOR JAMES A. REED of Mis-
souri, wants to have the govern
ment returned to the people. The
senator is of the opinion that there
are too many crooks in high places
today. We agree with the senator
but with the reservation that there
are no more crooks in government
today than there were one hundred
years ago. comparatively. After
reading of the exploits of Boss Tweed
of Tammany Hall, we are decidedly
of the opinion that our modern poll
ticians are no worse than their po-
litical forebears. They all graft,
some legitimately others illegitimate-
ly. But their populations come out Of
the sweat and blood of the workers.
That is the important consideratiea
for US.
MOT only has William Hale Thomp-
~ son of Chicago made name for
himself as chief bull-baiter to his ma
jesty, the king of the Anglo-Saxons,
| but he has blossomed out as a first
class prophet. "Bill' is fine fellow
as politicians go. He is democratic
and his big, spacious hands can slaS
shoulder at one hundred yards. A
man like Thompson is bound to GO
far in city like Chicago.
1T is as prophet that Mr.. Tfomp-
son shines brightest. Years age
during the reign of Theodore Roose-
welt, a fellow by the name of Lorime1
got in bad, because he plundered q
big bank in the Windy City. Robbing
banks was not then as popular a sport
as it is today, so Teddy being man
of the people refused to dine with
| I ,OTinoor This oo,tcad Tbor,psoo L..