davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Douglas daily dispatch., 1927-12-14
With Other Editors
AN INVITING WARMING
(Tucson Citizen)

guilty to violating the prohibition law
aggravated by the fact that he had set an
might disturb
tons consisted which would have been discharged by the
operation dsery nteope might have been
enforcement OFFICER AS a
matter officers entered by the
the device was located
nasnuch as at
heart he boegger He intended the death
of any srepiousy he knew there was a
char officer.
But the judge- judge cofned him the price OF Is
quarts of rot-gu him!
inclined TO THINK
small; practically invite them to go ahead
Douglas daily dispatch., 1927-12-14
BA|||iRBI8

Armies in northern China now are
introducing poison gas in their war
fare. 1t has taken China long time
to become civilized, but they're finally
getting around to it.
Big Bill Thompson has named as
health commissioner a physician who
''made a new face" for the mayor
after he was hurt in an explosion.
Maybe Mr.. Thompson figured that
was the kind of health expert Chi
cago needed.
A Missouri woman, seeking q di-
vorce, described her husband as ca
precious, whimsical, moody, cautious,
mordacious, turbul ent, bellicose,
genial, kind, amorous, garrulous and
fluent. The only thing she forgot to
add, it seems, was "and howl"
An experiment in which carrier
pigeons were fed wine was made re-
Gently and the pigeons have failed tc
return. Wine makes even a pigeon
hate to go home.
The Polish have been patroling the
Lithuanian border. But then, you
know, the Poles hate to go home.
A Missouri farmer has cat that
cloves to listen to the radio" His
girl friends voice?
Many an efficient man has become
ka h
Copyright, 1927, NEA Service, Inc)
Douglas daily dispatch., 1927-12-14
Plucked From the Plains
A Modern DecalOgue

Thou shalt have but one God; It's a
sin to have two.
(But to have none at all? Oh, WE'LL
that's up to YOU'D.
Make thee no craven in6ge for meek
alteration.
(Well, we don't make the coins-that
is done by the nation).
Do not swear. It is wrong to be fun
ing and fussing.
$50 live that your neighbor, must do
all the cussing)
Keep the Sabbath for rest all cares
that are irking.
(For you can't make mach money
when Iobody's working).
Honor Father and Mother. (For honor
is due,
Don't you think that they reared such
wonder as you?)
No weapon to slay any man shalt thou
draw;
This is written. (Of course, there's an
"unWritten laW'O.
Thou shalt not take the wife of thy
neighbor away.
Remember, divorce laws are easy to-
cay.
DO not steal. ct is foolish, in any
event,
Profiteering will net much higher
per cent?.
Thou shalt bear no false witness (Keep
still, when they quiz,
And The other mans crime will look
worse than it isl,
Thou shalt not covet riches that others
produce.
make them yours, if you can; if you
can't, what's the useD
Ted Robinson.
Douglas daily dispatch., 1927-12-14


important points n
aviation
the months
millions aipaneS fading
different financial interests invest millions
off when the not fly
will be
considered fit subject
people owned automobiles Now people
fairly good In 20 years IS
little private
slogan is GET AIR MINDED
Douglas daily dispatch., 1927-12-14
More Truth Than Poetry
BY JAMES J. MONTAGUE
WHAT'S TIE USE?
By JAM

WHAT'S TIE USE?
When Mr.. Volstead's will prevailed
While prohibitionists grew thicker,
And was told that I'd be- jailed
For drinking alcoholic liquor
I never took another tot
From stein or jug or flask or flagor
But went forthwith upon the wat
Er wagon.
I mourned indeed my nightly nip,
My stomach fell to misbehaving,
I thought of ale with moistening lip
OF sherry with Jan inward craving.
I dropped my Sunday whisky sling
And 'golly! how I used to miss, it;
And never tasted anything
Illicit.
But though all liquor I avoid
AS Sternly hidden by the nation,
I find my vitals are employed
In alcoholic distillation.
Each day a quite illegal ooze
From sundry places in me issues,
And joins my bloodstream to suffuse
My tissues.
So since my uncontrolled inside,
Complying to the will of nature.
For seven years has now defied
The nations sovereign legislature;
Since anyway can't keep dry,
Or help these secret violations
I'm thinking of resuning my
PotationS!
Douglas daily dispatch., 1927-12-14
Writ Like the Dickens

An Oriental paper, having an Eng
lish section, printed the following
notice:
"The< news Of English we tell the
latest. Writ in perfectly style and
most earliest. Do murder commit,
we hear of it and tell it. Do a
mighty chief die, we publish it and
in border somber. Staff has each
been colleged and write like the
Kipling and the Dickens We circle
every town and extortionate not for
advertisements"
Douglas daily dispatch., 1927-12-14

pie is not all it should be. think
must have left something out.
Husband with a grimace, after
sampling it): There's nothing you
could leave out that would make it
taste like that. 1t must be something,
you put, in. Boston Transcript.
Douglas daily dispatch., 1927-12-14
Rebind the Rars

Former Prohibition Chief Andrews
used to tell good story anent the
fate of bootleggers. This one did
business in a Vermont town where
his horse and buggy were as we'll
known as the country doctors.
One day, while delivering some
goods, they encountered a zebra that
had escaped from circus. The
bootlegger stared for moment at
the black and white stripes and
then shouted at dobbin:
"Git up, you lazy cuss! That's how
you'll look if you're ever caughtp
Douglas daily dispatch., 1927-12-14
ABE MARTIN

With all his wealth an inventive
genius an worldwide reputation, 1
notice that Henry Ford still uses
printers ink. I've often wondered how
a feller with single track mind side
steps new idea when he feels it
bearin' down on him.
Douglas daily dispatch., 1927-12-14
A Good Guess

Bible Glass Teacher: Now, which of
you children can tell me who it was
tlj2t fed 5000 people on seven loaves of
bread and
Tommy shouting from the rear of
the room): I bet it was the feller
that makes the sandwiches down at
the drug store. Life.
Douglas daily dispatch., 1927-12-14
Objection Removed

John, today I bought that lovely
bureau I've been wanting so long, $40
down.
"Why, I thought you were averse to
buying on installments?"
"I am. I hate the very sound of
the word, but this is different; they
gil the plan spaced payments
Douglas daily dispatch., 1927-12-14
Mutual

"I'd hate to live in town like this"
$50 would L. mister"
"Oh then, you're not a native?"
''Not SOS you can notice it. live
two miles west of here!"
Douglas daily dispatch., 1927-12-14
LOOK OUT FOR THEM

Germs put in a test tube 26 years
ago were found alive and husky when
they were released recently. And what
an appetite they must have!
Douglas daily dispatch., 1927-12-14
Sixteen Years Ago

park pavilion December 80. Har-
vey johnson, j. A. Mcclure and
John Patton are the committee.
D. L. Perry left yesterday for
Los Angeles where he will transact
business.
Douglas daily dispatch., 1927-12-14
True Love

Moneyed Magnate (to hard-up
suitor): Young man, d'you know how
I made my money?
Bright Young Man: Yes, but ! can't
permit that to stand in the way of
Muriels happiness.
Weekly Scotsman.
Douglas daily dispatch., 1927-12-14
Automatic Smoker

A machine that can smoke three
dozen pipes at once now saves the
smoker the distasteful job of breaking
in" new briar or meerschaum.
Equipped with mechanical m o ut h
and lungs, it "ages" pipe in a way
that would ordinarily require weeks of
steady use.
Douglas daily dispatch., 1927-12-14
HARD TO EXPLAIN

It is singular that Paul Poiret should
find thai American girls knees are
not beautiful. They certainly were
never ugly by scrubbing the kitchen
floor.
Douglas daily dispatch., 1927-12-14
THE F1RST I.ESsON

Children learn to fib when they dis
cover it is policy to pretend that they
believe in Santa Claus.
Copyright, 1927, Bell Syndicate, Inc)
Douglas daily dispatch., 1927-12-14
Too Efficient

Black: Did you hear that the fire
brigade sacked their efficiency expert?
Brown Why?
"He ordered unbreakable glass for
all the firm alarms"
London Answers,
Douglas daily dispatch., 1927-12-14
She Made Her Own

"Now, do tell me all the scandal
that's happened while I've been away"
''There hasn't been any, dear, while
you've been away" Exchange.
Douglas daily dispatch., 1927-12-14
Quick Thinker

PolicenI3n: Did you get his license?
Injured Pedestrian: Yes, here it is.
I yanked it off as he rolled over me,
Brooklyn Eagle.
Douglas daily dispatch., 1927-12-14
His Handicap

O'Qassidy (to foreman: I'm tired
of carryin' the hod want to push
barrer, like Flynn does
Foreman: You push barrer? Phwat
the dickens d'you know about machin-
cry? London Answers.
Douglas daily dispatch., 1927-12-14
Try It ON the Child

All you men who want to go to the
naval academy have a good chance if
you can figure out the answer to this
little problem: If it takes a wood
pecker with rubber bill a month and
half to bore hole through a cypress
log big enough to make lit shingles at
$1.5O a thousand, how long will it take
cross-eyed grasshopper with cork
leg to kick the seeds out of dill
pickle? Pennsylvania keystone.
Douglas daily dispatch., 1927-12-14

The firemen are making arrange
ments for the first annual dance
which will be given nt the ball
Douglas daily dispatch., 1927-12-14
Not Overlooked

English go globe trotting to see
the world and Americans do it to
cover the distance" said Wilbur
Russell recently. mot long ago
met a friend who had just come
back from across the pond and who
Dragged that he had done Paris in
two days.
"EIow in the world did you do
that?" I asked him.
9" Oh, it was easy said my
friend My daughter visited the
monuments and the museums, my
wife the stores, and did the music
halls and cafes
Douglas daily dispatch., 1927-12-14

Roberto v. Pesqueira left yes
terday for the Cuchuta ranch to
make arrangements for the ship
ment of 5000 hdad of cattle to
Texas. Hg
The fourth annual institute of
the. Sulphur Springs valley farm
ers under the auspices of the Uni
versity of Arizona will open today
in the Y NJ c.. A. building. Meet
ings will also be held at McNeal,
Whitewater, Light, Servoss, Wilcox
and Cochise.
Douglas daily dispatch., 1927-12-14

"How did her doll save your dolls
life?"
"By consenting to a TRANSMISSION OF
sawdust."
Douglas daily dispatch., 1927-12-14

Nothing Omitted Certainly
Young Wife: I'm afraid, dear, my
The Ely miner., 1927-08-26
Naturally

Dog Barber beginning work on the
household pet)-And how will you
have him clipped, ladyl
"With boyish bob, Of course"
The Ely miner., 1927-08-26

the report and financial statement
he accepted and filed and that
those in charge of the exhibit be
given vote of thanks for their
splendid work in connection with
this show. The motion carried.
The presidents report to the di-
rectors of the Minnesota Arrowhead
association for the years the secre-
tary's and chairman of the advertis-
ing committee statements for the
year were presented, and ordered
filed.
The matter of the Community
Fair and the exhibit at the State
Fair was discussed. 1t was moved
and supported that the Community
Fair be given an amount not to
exceed $250.00 and that the State
Fair exhibit be allowed an amount
not to exceed $4,000. The motion
carried.
1t was moved and supported that
$500 be allowed for the purchas-
ing and planting of more wild rice
seed for the lakes and marshes in
Lnls vicinity. The motion carried.
1t was moved and supported that
the secretary communicate with the
Chambers of Commerce in Hibbing,
Virgi>;a and Eveleth relative to a
Good Will tour to Fort William and
Port Arthur, Canada, for sometime
during the next month. The motion
carried.
1t was moved and supported that
the meeting adjourn. The motion
carried.
RAY HOEFLER, Secretary.
The Ely miner., 1927-08-26
ORDER FOR HEARING ON PETI-
TION FOR ADMINISTRATION.

State of Minnesota, County of ST.
Louis, SIS.
IN PROBATE COURT
In the Matter of the Estate of LEO
KUZMA, Decedent.
The Petition of Frances Kuzma
having been filed in this Court, rep
resenting, among other things, that
Leo Kuzma, then being a resident
of the County of st. Louis, State OF
Minnesota, died intestate; in the
County of st. Louis, State of Min.
nesota, on the 3rd day of June
1927; leaving estate in the County
Of st. Louis, State of Minnesota
and that said petitioner is the sur.
viving spouse of said decedent anc
praying that letters of administra
tion of the estate of said decedent
bic granted to the said Frances
Kuzma,
1t Is Orderd, that said petition bt
heard before this Court, at the Pro
bate Court Rooms in the Court
House in Duluth, in said County, OF
Monday, the 10th day of Septem
ber, 1927, at nine o'clock A. M.
and all persons interested in sale
hearing and in said matter are
hereby cited and required at saic
time and place to show cause, i
any there be, why said petition
should not be granted.
Ordered Further, That this Or
der be served by publication in Th'
Ely Miner according to law, ant
that copy of this order be servet
on the County Treasurer of st
Louis County not less than ten day
prior to said day of hearing.
Dated at Duluth, Mimi, Angus
23rd, 1927.
By the Court,
Attest: S. w. GILPIN,
Sheldon Watts, Judge of
Clerk of Probate. Probate
Seal of the Probate Court, Count,
of st. Louis, Minnesota.
A. j. Thomas, Atty. for Petitioner
1926 g.!
The Ely miner., 1927-08-26
OFFICIAL PROCEEDINGS
OF THE
|ELY COMMERCIAL CLUB, ]
33ttt3t333tt3ttt33t333t&tt3tttsts

Ely. Minnesota, August %, 1927.
The meeting was called to order
at S:15 D. m. by Vice President
Henning Olson.
The minutes of the regular meet
ing of June 2Sth were approved as
read.
Communication from the Mime
sofa Arrowhead association relative
to annual dues in the amount OF
$1,000 due for 1926 was read. 1t
was moved and supported that dues
in the amount of $1,000 for 1926
be allowed and paid. The motion
carried.
Communication from E. l.. Trask
relative to Wax Paper making out
fit was read and ordered filed.
Communication from Mr.. Peter
Schaefer of the Ely Miner express
| ing his appreciation to the commit
tee in charge of the reception for
the Editorial associations annual
outing for the reception rendered
them, was read, accepted and or
dered filed.
Communication from Mr.. G. X.
Duncan, chairman of the Goodwill
tour of the Fort William visitors,
expressing his appreciation and that
of the party for the splendid time
shown them while in Ely, was read,
accepted and ordered filed.
| Communication from the Mime
| sofa Came and Fish department
relative to their monthly publica-
| ton FINS, FEATHERS AND FUR,
was read and referred to the ad-
vertising committee.
The following bills, which had
been OK'd by the finance commit
tee and paid, were read:
D. & I. R. Ry. Co., Tel. and
| Telegraph, ------------S 4.9o
Ray Hoefler, stamps, cards
and steno., ------------ lo.OO
o. T. Friedsburg, dinner and
| music, ---------------- loo.oo
Northwoods Pub. Co., adver-
tising. $500
The Herald Co., advertising 1850
1t was moved and supported that
the ;ction of the finance committee
in IKing and paying the above
bills be approved. The motion car
ried.
The following bills were read:
The Chocolate Shop, cigars-$ 900
D. & I. R. Ry. Co., Tel. and
Telegraph, -------------- 6.89
Ray Hoefler, stamps, cards
] and steno., ------------ 11.68
The Hotel Ely, dinner so
plates, Fort William, ---- 5000
The Herald Co., ADVERTISING 1928
American Legionnaire, adj
vertising, -------------- %
J. A. Rothman, auto hire and
tire repair, ------------- 5.85
1t was moved and supported that
the bills as read be allowed and or
ders drawn in payment of same.
The motion carried.
The treasurer's report for the
period commencing June 28th and
ending August 23rd, was read, ac-
cepted and ordered filed.
The report and financial state
ment of the exhibit at the 9Th Ma
tional Outdoor Life Exposition was
read.
1t was moved and supported that
The Ely miner., 1927-08-26
OF Course

"Then what did Rip Van winkle do.
William?'
"Picked up his tools an went back
to work"
The Ely miner., 1927-08-26
ORDER TO EXAMINE FINAL AC-
COUNT.

State of Minnesota, County of st.
Louis, IS.
IN PROBATE COURT
In the Matter of the Estate of LENA
SERAPHINE, Decedent.
The Petition of Joseph P. Seraphine
as representative of the above named
decedent, together with his final ac-
count of the administration of said
estate, having been duly filed in this
Court, representing, among other
things, that he has fully administered
said estate, and praying that said
final account of said administration
be examined, adjusted and allowed
by the Court, and that the Court
make and enter its final decree OF
distribution of the residue of the es-
tate of said decedent to the persons
entitled thereto, and for the dis
charge of the said representative
and the sureties on his bond.
1t Is Ordered, That said petition
be heard, and said final account ex-
amined, adjusted, and if correct, al
lowed by the Court, at the Probate
Court Rooms in the Court House, in
the City of Duluth in said County,
on Monday, the 18th day of Septem-
Der, 1927, at ten o'clock A. M, and
all persons interested in said hear
ing and in said matter are hereby
cited Ind required at said time and
place to show cause, if any there be,
why said petition should not be
granted.
Ordered Further, That this Order
be served by publication in The Ely
Miner according to law.
Dated at Duluth, Minnesota, Au-
gust 18th, 1927.
By the Court,
Attest: S. w. GILPIN,
Sheldon Watts, Judge of
Clerk of Probate. Probate.
Seal of the Probate Court, County
of St. Louis, Minnesota.
H. ]. Merdink, Atty. 8-19 9-2
The Ely miner., 1927-08-26
ORDER TO EXAMINE FINAL AC-
COUNT.

State of Minnesota, County of st.
Louis, IS.
IN PROBATE COURT
In the Matter of the Estate of EMIL
WITRI, Decedent.
The Petition of John E. Johnson
as representative of the above
named decedent, together with his
final account of the administration
of said estate, having been duly
filed in this Court, representing,
among other things, that he has
fully administered said estate, and
praying that said final account of
said administration be examined,
adjusted and allowed by the Court,
and that the Court make and enter
it's final decree of distribution of
the residue of the estate of said
decedent to the persons entitled
thereto, and for the discharge of
the said representative and the
sureties on his bond.
1t Is Ordered, That said petit
tion be heard, and said final ac-
SOullt NC S@AduililCO, doJuoIcu, duu IL
correct, allowed by the Court, at
the Probate Court Rooms in the
Court House, in the City of Duluth,
in said County, on Monday, the 10Th
day of September, 1927, at ten
o'clock A. M, and all persons in
terested in said hearing and in said
matter are hereby cited and re-
quired at said time and place to
show cause, if any there be, why
said petition should not be granted.
Ordered Further, That this Or
der be served by publication in The
Ely Miner according to law.
Dated at Duluth Mimi, August
18th, 1927.
By the Court,
Attest: S. w. GILPIN,
Sheldon Watts, Judge of
Clerk of Probate. Probate.
Seal of Probate Court, County of
st. Louis, Minnesota.
H. ]. Merdink, Atty. 8-26 90
The Ely miner., 1927-08-26
|ORDER FOR HEARING ON PETI.
TION FOR ADMINISTRATION.
State Of Minnesota, County Of st.
Tn,,ic &C
IN PROBATE COURT

AouAo, oos
IN PROBATE COURT
In the Matter of the Estate Of
CHARLES NAPPA, Sr., Decedent.
The Petition of Katherine Larson
having been filed in this Court, re ,
resenting, among other things, that
Charles Nappa, Sr., then being a
resident of the County of st. Louis,
State of Minnesota, died intestate !;
in the County of st. Louis, State of
Minnesota, on the goth day of July.
1927, leaving estate in the County
of st. Louis, State Of Minnesota.
and that said petitioner is a daugh'
ter and one of the 'next-of-kin of
said decedent and praying that let
ters of administration of the estate
of said decedent be granted to the
said Katherine Larson,
1t Is Ordered, that said petition
be heard before this court, at the
Probate Court Rooms in the Court
House in Duluth, in said County, on
Monday, the 18th day of September,
|1927, at nine o'clock A. M, and all
persons interested in said hearing
and in said matter are hereby cited
and required at said time and place
to show cause, if any there be, why
said petition should not be granted
Ordered Further, That this order
be served by publication in The
Ely Miner according to law, and that
copy of this order be served on
the County Treasurer of st. Louis
County not less than ten days prior
to said day of hearing.
Dated at Duluth, Minn., August
18th, 1927.
By the Court,
Attest: S. w. GILPIN,
Sheldon Watts, Judge of
Clerk of Probate. Probate.
Seal of the Probate Court, County
of St. Louis, Minnesota.
A. j. Thomas, Attorney for Peti-
| TONER. 8-19 90
The Ely miner., 1927-08-26
Efficiency

"You see that man with the high
forehead and the sunked eyesT
"Yes. What is he?"
"He's an efficiency expert, he told
me-"
"What on earth's thatf"
"The sort of man who doesn't en-
Joy a sea voyage because all the salt
is going to waste
The Ely miner., 1927-08-26
Talented

First Artist painted lump OF
pig iron once to look like cork, and
when / threw 1t into the water 1t
floated.
Second Artist-That's nothing. /
painted lump of pig iron to look
like roast of beef and my dog ate
three-quarters of 1t before he dis
covered his mistake.
The Ely miner., 1927-08-26
Was Proof to Him

Young Willie Jenks thought he,
Was pretty Katherine's suitor.
But when she married Free
He learned he did not suffer.
The Ely miner., 1927-08-26
Reasonable

Reasonable
Fl don't believe in a woman's going
to restaurant by herself"
Because of conventionf'
mo. Because she has to pay her
check"
The Ely miner., 1927-08-26
HANDICAPPED

Asylum Director-I know the very
man we want for our new superintend-
ent.
Doctor-What's his name?
Asylum Director-It happens to De
George Washerson.
Doctor-Nothing doingl Sounds
too much like George Washington
the visitors will be taking him for
one Of the inmates.
The Ely miner., 1927-08-26
English as 1t Is Spoken

In the grade school little girl was
working a problem on the blackboard
A sidelong glance showed the teacher
that she was placing the figures In
column form. He asked: Doris, are
you subtracting or multiplying
"Neither one. sir, am 'plusing.' was
the reply.
The Ely miner., 1927-08-26
Easy

"And do you ever lose yourself In
your work.
"Yes."
what is your work."
"Exploring Central Africa"
The Ely miner., 1927-08-26
Fair Warning

Boatman-You better look out when
we get past the buoy, missus, I'm go
ing to luff.
The Lady-You try any Of them
games on me, young man, and you'll
get one over the 'ead with this um-
brella.
The Ely miner., 1927-08-26
Bricks Nou Made of Fiber

Bricks made from the fibers of pal
metto, sea grass and similar material
have been recently put on sale for
construction work, and are said to
give much satisfaction. They are
considerably larger than ordinary
brick.
Evening star., 1927-04-16
DIARY OF A
NEW FATHER
by ROBERT e. DICKSON.

Friday night.
Well, this is swell world all right
when your wife gets mad at you one
night and the next day you find her
out riding with another man, and she
| had the nerve to get out of his car
right in front of the apartment, too.
and If / had not seen it / would not
believe it.
was coming home from work and
I had just turned the corner when
this car stopped and Joan got out, and
she stood there talking and just. as
I came up to them the guy in the car
said, 'I'il be around next Tuesday,
then" and away he went, and / was
30 surprised I forgot to look at his
number even.
Well. Joan turned around and saw
me, and she said, "Hello," and I said,
''Oh, certainly--hello," and We went
on in, and she did not gay q word all
the way upstairs. The janitor' s
daughter was staying with the baby,
and she left and Joan started talking
to Junior, and hung uTs my coat and
hat, and i said, Perhaps you would
| not mind giving me an explanation.
Joan said, Explanation of what?''
and / said, AN explanation Of why |
find you riding with another man,
and she looked surprised. and she
said, after the way you treated the
baby last night, / don't even care to
speak to you," and l said, Because
accidentally bumped his head, you
think you can get away with murder
right in front of my eyes, do you?"
and she did not say a word. and she
ivent out to the kitchen and began
getting dinner.
Well. / did not feel like PLAYING with
the baby, and / sat down and lit a