Douglas daily dispatch., 1926-06-29
Plucked From the Plains
StGMed

SteNved
! Jo: tWas / stewed last night?
"FWas you? Say when 1 saw you
last night you were a-straddle a rail
fence, yelling: Buck, you leather-eyed
bronx, buck!"
A BustIing Burg
Visitor: Il should think by the look
of things that nothing ever happens
here"
| Native: "Oh, it be q pretty lively tn
place for it's size-why, it's not two W
weeks since we had an eclipse of the
moon. The Passing Show Nondon). 80
Specialists so
Does your man work, Mrs. Waggs?" it,
'Oh, yes; he peddles balloons when M
ever there's rodeo in town. What be
does your husband do?" pc
He sells smoked glasses during
eclipses of the sun."-Life. ce
m
: Negro Caller at Hospital: Il came di
to how nah fren' Joe Brown was r,
betting along" co
Nurse: why, he's getting along M
fine; he's convalescing now" of
Negro: well, I'll just sit down and bu
wait till he's through" = Brockton tr
Call. to
Black: ''Nigguh, how much you git ra
tim for workin' here.?"
Tan: Ten dollars per-"
Black: What? Ten dollars per day?" in
Tan: "Naw-perhaps" ou
ad
Boss: You sure slipped a lot of 81
bum jokes into this last ISSUE" ze
Editor: "Oh, don't know. I put
bunch of them in the fire this morn IN
ing and the stove just roared." so
More Profit ne
Noah Cooper head of the Sabbath ~
crusade committee that has risen in
the south, was talking in New York Ii,
about books. ~
"These licentious modern writer's mi
are all mercenary," he said. "They to
write only for money. A woman said lo
to typical modern writer at an aft
ernoon tea: w.
81 liked your last book so much III
that I read it six times fir
'Humph! I'd rather, he sneered NJ.
you'd bought six copies" az,
Encouraging
Hoot Gibson was kidding one of the -
girls on the set. iii bet you've got 70
a lot Of sweethearts' hes aid, by way ~ ~
of starting some fun. ~
Yes, / have" admitted the girl with 49,
her best Hollywood blus, 'but the
man marry must be nero" 49,
"Nonsepse!" retorted Hoot you're In
not as bad looking as that!" nN
Fifty-fifty
A country friend visited a Pasadena
millionaire and was very much inter-
ested in the elecrc appliances such as Ia, Ia
waffle irons and percolators to tn. o. p-
kene delight of his wealthy host. FL
nally, however, Silas said with a twin
kle in his eye: po'
eo,,,s aa+i-. ~. ~ mans Lun ol Sla
see where eating in the kitchen is any .ll, 49,
worse than cooking J in the dining slr
room" faa a - On sh
Most Important an
Mrs. Harold Lloyd's baby was the Wo
sensation of the neighborhood and ali
the children for blocks around came to OF
view it. Among them was little Philip, IAN
whose interest +o ta11 +-a +ru+1 oo, The
tered NOT so nucb in the hobv &c - tina
the multitude of pine rings and lock- tlo
cts with which it was surrounded In
Philip examined al these gifts care oc'
fully, and finally, turning to the fam :
GUS comedian, asked: Did all these .,
'oiio WIN ~ dit
Cover;nr Tin eel
Prompted by curiosity, farmer haG sr'
grown crop of flax and had a table an
cloth made of linen. Some time later gu
he remarlxed to a visitor ~ a;xe, Th
II grew this table cloth myself" chs
did you really?' she exclaimed spe
How did you manage it?" CIV
1t was obvious that the guest had M
idea of how tablecloths camein to be- Isl
ing,- so the farmer lowered his voice ira
and in whisper replied: asi
IF you promise not to give the Sc eel
cret away, I'll tell you-I planted res
table napkinn' ers
Wasting Time
The small boy spied the steeplejack on
hig in air, working on a church spire, III
and stood in the street gazing up at Pr Pr
him in rapt attention. One by one, Us
others joined the lad until quite 'he
crowd had collected. eAl
Finally, after Is minutes of rapt
attention, the small boy turned to the pa
crowd and exclaimed in disgust: II u -
guess there amt no use waiting. he
amt going to fall ~
FLORIDA REAL ESTATE out
MAN HELD FOR MTTRDFLR pre-