davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1926-06-12

qMe.TWNS

The Twins stood on the corner in
Shut-Eye Town for quite while,
watching all the queer people 20
silently by.
! "No wonder the Fairy Queen said
that 1nco probably came here" said
Nick to Nancy. "An elephan: with
pink roses all over him isn't half as
queer as eggs that bend, and daisies
in silk hats, and gentlemen that turn
into Holsters and snap their fingers
at YOU"
II should say not" said Nancy. 81
wonder where the Forty Winks
WENT"
That reminded Nick of the pink
tickets. WED better be using thes :"
he remarked. "They won't be any
i good tomorrow"
| With that he reached into his
pocket for his ticket. But behold, no
matter how much Of it he pulled out,
always some stayed in. 1t was like
taking hold Of the end of a spool Of
thread.
He kept pulling and pulling and
pulling until he had quite ten yards
and half of pink ticket in his
hands, with dear knows how much
more to come.
Nancy reached into her pocket for
her ticket, too, but Nick stopped her.
"You'd better not" he said. II don't
know what to do with all have now.
1t must be made Of Grade A Number
One rubber like the streets"
| SILLY! OF course I'm not" said a
voice suddenly, and to the Twins
amazement the ticket grew head
that curled itself around and looked
at them with great pink eyes. "If
you would just read what it says on
me you could see that ! am merely
doing my duty. Look at the sixth
line below the dashes!"
| The printing on the ticket seemed
| to grow big all at once like printing
on page when you hold magnify
ing glass over it. The sixth line said,
"This ticket will take the owner to
any place in Drowsy Land"
well, what Of it," said Nick.
What has that got to do with you
stretching out so long T. can't hold
you in my two hands,"
Lots" said the ticket. LET me
60, and then see what happens. /
cant take you any place, can /, if
you're going to hold onto me so
tight? Where should you like to 20 2"
Just any place ut ALL" said Nick
thoughtlessly, never dreaming what
his words meant.
| That's three stations off," said the
pink ticket. LAY me down on the
ground and see what happens.r
So Nick let 60 the ticket, and in
stantly it spread itself along the,
ground in o stright line and turned
into q railroad track. And Nancy
and Nick found themselves in q neat
little car, rolling smoothly along on
two long black lines that had turned
into tracks.
II see now why they say that tick
cts take YOU places" said Nancy.
isn't this fine!"
Soon Shut Eye Town was far be-
hind with all its queer; people. And
the Twins forgot to wonder about the
foolish things they had seen. They
kept looking to the right and left this
way and that for some sign Of Inco
and Flops. They passed an orchard
-whsss dreams were growing and
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1926-06-12
SANDY ::: :


him. He saw that she couldn't keen
her hands from shaking.
some money!"
"Mow much do you want, little
IAN you can spare. know you've
not got much"
;. "No-but can hook my overcoat.
II necessary" He out his hsnds
over hers. He said warmly: "What's
the matter, kid 2"
SANDY pressed her hands AGAINST
ner Ups. They were so ashen. "Oh.
nothing. want to get away. I've
got to get away"
"Where?"
Anywhere! won't STAY another
night with him--l can'ti TIM iosine
already"
(Cohtinued.)
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1926-06-12
(Ohicial City, State and County Newspaper)
Why Pick on a Dead Cow?

u
For IS years Mrs. OLeary's famous has beer
the most celebrated bovine in this countrys history
Mrs. O'Lcarys COW. you will recall, was credited
with having started the great Chicago fire in 1871
by the simple expedent of kicking over her mis-
tress' coal-oil lamp.
But recently there have been attacks on the au-
hentcity ,of the story implications that it is just
another myth, a pleasant sounding fancy, an old
wives tale
Writes one to say that Mrs. O'Leary's COW
started fire Saturday night, which put
Out the great fire starting late Sunday night in a
section far removed from bossys she'd Writes an
other say that the whole yarn is constructed from
applesau3.
Luckily Mrs. O'Icarys notorious animal is dead for
surelyf she alive she would be unable to with
stand these attacks her integrity. One can pic.
ture the look of mild reproach in her soft brown
eyes as demon literalist approaches with docu-
mentary evidence and, with accusing finger pointed
at her, declares, 'You are fraud"
Under the circumstances, you would hardly ex-
pect thegentle creature to produce any milk at ALL
She would pine and anguish beneath all this doubt.
ing scorn and die of self pity.
For IS years Mrs. OLeary's Jersey, or Holstein-
perhaps she Guernsey-occupied her own
little NICHE in the history of great middle west.
Why not leave her there in peace? AS far as W.
know. she a pretty fair cow and surely unde-
serving of all these assaults on her good name.
We are growing too literal minded; the founda-
ton shakes beneath the story Of the cherry and
George Washington's Ratchet, and they do say that
Paul Revere was mmortalized by poem rather
than deed. Why bother to disprove them? It
costs nothing to entertain an illusion two and
few of us will thank the fact-oving historians who
seek to explode them.
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1926-06-12
SHAfER ATTACKS S0RLIE'S STATEMENTS
CONCERNING INDEPENDENTS PLATFORM

Casselton, N. D.. June 12-[R-
Statements attributed to Governor
Sorlie in which the executive is
quoted As saying that the platform
adopted by the Independents at Devils
Lake "unequivocally calls for the
junking of the North Dakota State
industries, including the state mill
and elevator, the Bank of North Da-
kota, the state hail insurance depart
ment, TIE state fire and tornado in
surance department and the state
bonding department" were attacked
by Attorney General George Shafer
In an address here last night.
1.-THE people Of the state are en-
titled to have the Independent plat
form constructed by the candidates
running upon that platform" said
Shsfer In branding the governors
statement as untrue and miscon-
structioT of our platforms declara-
tions or those subjects"
q what 1t Does Do
What the Independent platform
does pf1dRe it's candidates to do.
Hhafer 1aid, Is to place future opera
4fon Of 3he state mill under "other
MANAGES ent" thus converting il into
= pgjva(( instead Of state-operated
~ lpdepen1ent platform pledges
~ ean( dates to continue the farm
Ian Ae6ertment Of the Bank Of North
D6kota hut 70 eliminate its deposit
~ and commercial banking features
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1926-06-12
What Nexfg

Roger Williams, it has just been disclosed not
only the founder Of Rhode Island hut one Of the
states first licensed liquor dealers as well.
reference in an old volume Of colonial records
says, 1T is granted unto Mr. Roger Williams to have
leave to sell little wine, strong water to some
natives in their sickness"
Not so long ago, Rupert Hughes kicked up fuss
by making public beer recipe Of George Washing
tons. And now this scandal about Roger Williams.
What next?
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1926-06-12
BARBS

M, BY Tom Stms
-, Inings are looking up q bit in
washington. The senate has au.
tnoried GA new airplanes.
!'erhaps the Prince Of Wales ha.
gut smoking. Anyway, he says he
Summer has It's advantages. The
rao'o doesn't work so we'll.
In New York man who va. II.
on the head with hammer lost his
voice. Singers beware.
Isn't it strange how .x!J gi2I l,iasn IN
less sense than we have seem. n 81 :,
along much better? 's
Tokyo's fish market covers 480. O0o
square feet. and they sell lots Of
American tourists.
Dollar matchmaker Is mot;,.
dollar fountain pens now. = w %ias'SSe e
would start an auto factory.
In Chicago girl got $4,000 for
her broken heart. And q man can't
even get decent drink for his.
You don't see any Of the Younger
generation wearing wells. They are
TOO dangerous after q few drinks of
bad BOOZE
II we want the marriage laws
changed, let's let four marry instead
OF two-so they can play bridge.
We always have summer Just as
soon as the weather is warm enough.
reopie Just can't understand why
people just can't understand.
Copyright, 1926, NEA Service. Incl
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1926-06-12

Of Tinker to Evers to Chance Echoes of Barry to
Collins to McInnis, of Peck to Harris to Judge!
Baseball is the American game but numbered
among the star performers Of history are Germans,
Swedes. Frenchmen, Poles, Cubans, Irshmen Ital-
ians and what not And now
Cohen to Kelly! Abe's Irish Rose Hooray!
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1926-06-12

snore factory, and yawning cave.
And they alison passed sandy hill
markedJ Private! Keep off! Sand
man,
II suppose" said Nancy, that is
sleepy sand"
1T is" said the ticket "But here
we are. This is your station. 1t is
called Any Place At All! Hop Quit"
With that it curled itself up and
jumped into Nick's pocket.
Ito BE COntinued)
Copyright, 1926, NEA Service. Inc. \
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1926-06-12
THE STORY 30 FAR

poverished family into q loveless
marriage with Ben Murillo. . rich
italian, sacrifices her love for Jimmy.
q childhood sweetheart. Murillo's
tyranny and insolence cause her to
write to Judith Moore, . San Fgancico
cousin. for help in escaping her
ma ritul bondage, but Judith is absent
on long vacation. A son is born,
dying almost Immediately.
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1926-06-12
Cohen TO Kelly

New York Giant fans waited for it long time,
but finally it happened Andy Cohen, substitute in
fielder was sent in to pinch hit for frankie Ersch.
He singled Then he took his place at second base,
and few minutes later he threw out runner at
first base and down into the records the play
Cohen to Kelly
Cohen to Kelly! Shades of dads day, when base
ball echoed with the famous double play combination
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1926-06-12

has had in conducting INDUSTRIAL en-
terprises.'
| Called Side Issues
Characterizing these as "side is
Sues Shafer denied that the hail
insurance department. bonding fund
and fire and tornado funds are is
sues in this campaign. Had there
been any intention by the Independ.
ents to attack these enterprises their
platform would have said so in spe-
cific language, Shafer declared.
Certain language used in our plat
form such as that declaring that we
should take the state out of business
and the state should not be in bust
ness it should never have gone into
business but did so to the extent of
millions Of dollars and the taxpayers
are now footing the BILL etc. refer
only to instances of the state operat-
ing private business at the expense
of the taxpayers or upon the capital
or credit of the state, like the state
mill, Bank Of North Dakota, Home
Building association and like enter.
prises."
The state Irvine plant, Shafer said
has been running for Is years and
is operated primarily to furnish oc.
equations for the. men in the peni.
Tertiary. There are no other Irvine
plants in the state. It has no com
petition and no private industries are
impaired by it. The labor cost is
small and enables it to make Irvine
at low cost and still pay operating
expenses.
Statement Challenged
Challenging Sorlie's statement that
the plant has made 9oOO. 900. ShafeI
asked Why 4 was neceSsary for thu
legislature to appropriate $685.. OO(
for the maintensnce Of the peni.
Tertiary during the last bisnnium, Il
such were the, case. "The Irvine
plant proves nothing in support Of
thes industfial program except tbs
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1926-06-12
FORGET r.

y cant remember the words of
that new song"
THAT makes it easier. Now all
you've got to do to make home happy
is to forget the tune"
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1926-06-12
AS USUAL

What. another row with your
wife! What's the trouble this time Z"
The same old think-she's right
and ! don't agree wfS6 hsS.r-Liis.
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1926-06-12

Mrs. Mary Hammered. IS, mother
of Arthur Hammered Of Mandan, died
Yesterday at st. Mary's hospital in
Minneapolis. of heart disease. Mr..
and Mrs. Arthur Hammered Of Man
dan and Peter Hammered of Mime
apolis were with her at the time of
death.
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1926-06-12
NEWS BRIEFS

Papal Legate and five other car
dinals arrived in New York for Chi
cago Eucharistic congress.
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1926-06-12

House breaks all speed records by
approving 10, bills.
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1926-06-12
MANDAN NEWS

The Presbyterian, Episcopal and
Methodist churches of Mandan will
join in conducting a daily vacation
Bible school for children under high
school age. The school will open
Monday and will continue two weeks.
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1926-06-12

Captain wilkins and members of
Detroit Arctic expedition debark from
Fairbanks, Alaska, after unsuccessfnl
attempts to find land near pole.
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1926-06-12
A COMPLIMENT

A COMPLIMENT
He: You look very beautiful to.
She: Flatterer!
He: Really! ! had to look twice be-
fore / recognized you.-London Tit.
Bits.
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1926-06-12

Senate passes 1856 .0O0, 900 federal
aid road bill. approved by house.
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1926-06-12

/ Jess Sweetser. winner OF British
amateur golf title, lands in New York
III. and physicians say he is out Of
championship play for the rest Of
| the year.
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1926-06-12
PEACE.TIME ARMY

| Sergeant: So you want to enlist
For how long? '''
! Recruit: Duration.
I Sergeant: But there's no war
Recruit: know. mean dmrat;o,
| Of peace-Lond0n Tit-Bits
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1926-06-12
A THOUGHT

But the meek shall inherit the
earth, and shall delight themselves
in the abundance of peace.-Ps.
37:l1.
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1926-06-12

Be very sure that no man will
learn anything at all unless he learn
at first humility.-Owen Meredith.
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1926-06-12

NO WONDER
I'm going to give you this violin. !"
AN out-and-out gift?''
-. absolutely. No strings to it!"-
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1926-06-12

Senate passes ,$l65, 00o. 900 federal
AID road BILL approved by house.
House breaks all speed records by,
approving ITO, bills.
Captain Wilkins and members. of
Detroit Arctic expedition debark from
Fairbanks, Alaska, after unsuccessful
attempts to find land near pole.
Jess Sweetser. winner OF British
amateur golf title, lands in New YORK
III, and physicians say he is out Of
Championship play for the rest Of
the year.
. Special term Of court will be held
ct Williston starting June la Mt
which 4. w. Frazier, former clerk
OF district court Of Divide county.
North Dakota. will be tried on en-.
bezzlement charges.
Three youths were indicted on
charges of first degree manslauehter
at st. Paul in connection with the
death Of Ashley Robinson, hiRh school
senior, who died after being At
tucked Dy r0W0leS.
Indeterminate sentence Of FL years
in state penitentiary was imposed
on =. E. Engberg, former treasurer
OF Divide county, North Dakota. who
pleaded guilty at Crosby to EN-
bezzlements Of $4,000.
Harry Robert Keller, charged with
robbing postoffice at Pineree. N. D..
was arrested at Leavenworth peni.
Tertiary after he had completed term
for another offense.
Minneapolis Wooden Mills Of Min.
neapo!is was ordered by federal trade
commission at Washington to eliniin-
t sla rem e. xsrs trade .o nam: ard
which would indicate that IL own.
ed and operated mil1a
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1926-06-12

summer has its advantages. The
radio doesn't work so we'll.
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1926-06-12

In New York a man who was hit
on the head with q hammer lost his
voice. Singers beware.
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1926-06-12

Dollar matchmaker is making
dollar fountain pens now. wish he
would start an auto factory. -
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1926-06-12

You don't see any Of the Younger
generation wearing wells. They are
TOO dangerous after q few drinks Of
bad booze. "' ~
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1926-06-12

In Chicago girl got $4,000 for
ner broken heart. And man CANT
even get decent drink for hH
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1926-06-12

Tokyo's fish market covers 100000
square feet. and they sell lots Of
American tourists. -
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1926-06-12

II we want the marriage laws
changed, let's let four marry instead
OF two-so they can play bridge.
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1926-06-12

Isn't it strange how peopIe with y
! Tess sense than we have seem % GET :
along much better?
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1926-06-12

!erhaps the Prince Of Wales ha.
gut S smoking. Anyway, he says he
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1926-08-15

TO the seating. or rather, lying down.
canacity OF the trains; say forty or
hftv individuals who expected TO De
na,.ticularly busy at their office on
Monday received subway cards Tor
that day: forty or nifty others, whose
busy day was Tuesday. were invited
10 ride that day, and so on through
the week. -
Each car was equipped with half a
dozen four poster beds. half dozen
win beds. three or four easy chairs
and a chaise lounge. Later the twin
beds were taken out of the equip
nent because SO few twins seemed 10
ha in business in New York more
correctly. many sets of twins We're
in business. but not in the same line
and not particularly busy on the same
dav For example, the Kitchell twins,
Howell and GroWell, they both hao
otsces downtown. hut Howell was "A
1shmoncer with an exclusive Friday
.rada While Growell sold weltS ana
nv tacit agreement. out-oi-tu"n wet
hI,vers visited New York Mondays
oriv And il was the same with other
sets of twins.
Editor's note: These facts are
wrought out in other autobioSraphles
u the early pinslssl
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1926-08-15

all in all, and etc, she was dressed
in a way far more suitable to me, but
naturally l didn't say nothing at the
time. / merely welcomed her In a
kindly, plying sort of a way, Won
dering how was | ever conner lead
her into looking and acting like a
nice, sweet young lady should, land
also how / was conner find out how
nice, sweet young ladies look and act.
I really wasn't aware Of having seen
any in quite some time.
OF course 7 could remember how
1 had looked and acted when nice
sweet young lady my own personal
self I had long hair and cotton
stockings and the only paint I ever
used was white enamel, and that
went into the furniture in my bed
room, in which I took my rest and
also a sweet. girlish interest. But
that memory wasn't conner do me
any good where Pet was concerned,
on account 1 couldn't put her hair
back on, and the only pair of cotton
stockings left in the world was in
the museum under a glass case. So
l decided, well, time will do the
trick, the wholesome influence / am
conner surround her with will make
her hair grow or stand on end. or
something, and we will see a great
change Someplace.
So after Pet had been around the
house a few days 1 commenced to
be conscious that our bright, CHEEKY,
but quiet home life wasn't enough
for a young thing like her. and so
1 says to her, now, dear, l says, l
am conner give a party for you and
ask all the nice boys and girls in
town, sos you will know our young
folks. l personally myself do not
know them, but 1 know some of
their families and will ask them all
and some of the most select mothers
as chaperones.
And Pet says do they make good
chaperones? And I says Of course.
And Pet says what do they make
the chaperones with, do they use
orange juice? And l says my land,
what do you think a chaperone is?
And she says why l never heard of
one before. but / suppose it is some
kind of fancy drink. Which shows
what l was up against, and how bad
that poor dear child needed reform
ing.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1926-08-15

q little house In the country. 1t is a
new house, but it is terribly damp.
due, I guess, to poor construction.
What 1 want to know is: How can I
keep water from running into my
house?
Yours truly, 1. o. n. MYHOWS.
Answer-Dont pay your water bill.
Dear Mr.. Wynn: Last night l had
an argument with my brother about
different kinds of weather. My brother
said that cold" travels faster than
heat" while 1 insisted that heat"
travels the fastest. Who is right?
Truly yours, 1. SICKLE.
Answer-You are right. Heat"
travels the fastest because you can't
catch it, while it is very easy to
catch cold"
Dear Mr. Wynn: For years / have
wondered about the "three-ball' signs
in front of pawnbrokers' shops. Every
pawnshop has the same kind of a
sign. Is there any particular mean
ing to the three balls?
Sincerely, I. G.. EVERYTHING.
Answer-Three balls in front Of a
pawnshop mean that it's to 1 that
the things people pawn will never be
redeemed.
Dear Mr., Wynn: 1 am the presi-
dent of the Offenon Railroad and need
some of your advice. The board of
directors have had several meetings
but cannot come to a decision. Our
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1926-08-15

trouble is simply this: In the past
year one Of our trains has been in FL
wrecks; the peculiar part of the whole
thing is that only the last car OF the
train gets damaged. and the rest or
the train comes through all right.
What can we do to prevent the last
car from getting smashed?
Truly yours, n. JINSMOKE.
Answer-The next time that par
ticular train starts out for trip just
leave the last car off the train.
Dear Mr.. Wynn: l have an uncle
who is a farmer. In talking about his
farm he said he though of all his cat
tie that pigs were the most wonderful
animals in all the world. l did not
want to appear ignorant. SO did not
question him. Can you tell me why
he said pigs were the most wonderful
animals in the wOrld?'
Yours truly, HAYS Fed.
Answer-He is right, because pigs
are the only animals that are killed
before they are cured.
Dear Mr.. Wynn: saw A man drop
a nickel in a letter box and then
say, Conductor, leave me off at 14th
street" Don't you think he was
drunk?
Sincerely yours. G. l. GIGGLED.
Answer next week
THE PERFECT FOOL.
Copyright. 1921
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1926-08-15
WatercreSs as Food.
CTO Re Continued.J

Has the common watercress some
real value as food and a rnedi.
cine? Evidently the answer is yes,
to judge from Investigations made re-
Gently by DIR. S. Monckton Crompton
Of London. He has experimental with
both animals and humans.
The ages of the human subjects
varied widely; in ali cases they gained
IN weight, improved in appetite. their
skins became much more healthful,
and constipation, If ii existed, was en-
tirely removed DR.. Monckton also
studied the cress itself TO discover the
chemical basis for it's dietary virtues,
and found that the residue from the
extracted juices q: the plant gave
marked reactions with all the test so
buttons for alkaloids. A glucose pres
ent in the form of potassium salt was
first isolated. Re found also that
watercress contains the three Vita
mines A, b and &, together with
Pits Of potash and iron. in addition
u considerable quantity Of iodine,