davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1926-03-30
M 4 n Y Shit TED
IN RESERVES

Local reserve headquarters yes
terday announced the following
changes:
Major Roland L.. Gaugler, U.S.A.,
assistant executive officer at head.
quarters, is, in addition to his other
duties, detailed as executive officer
of the 362d. 503d, 512th, 6O2d, and
612th ordnance companies.
Lieut.. Col. Robert w. Brace, medi.
cal reserve, having moved 10. the
Fourth corps area, is relieved as
commanding officer of the 99th sta
ton hospital
Majors Herbert Simmons. relieved
of assignment to the S77th service
battalion; Charles E. Pollard, at
tached to the S0th division; Freder-
lex "A. Livingstone, assigned to
the Goth division; Thaddeus 5. Troy,
assigned to the 364th medical regt.
ment. fourth army; Augustus Z
Gray, assigned to hospital battalion
Headquarters, 364th medical regi-
ment; Howard s. Kane, assigned 20
ambulance battalion headquarters:
364th medical regiment; Kari
Schaffle, assigned to the SSth gen:
eral hospital, assistant to CHIEF OF
medical service.
Captains Joseph ". McNary. a.
signed to 243rd engineers; Walter A.
Gawler, assigned to S51st graves
registration unit; Baldwin W..
Foote, assigned to the 5O3rd imam
try battalion; Frank s. Checker, as
signed to the 427th service bat
talon. colored.
First Lieuts. William r. Lucas,
to active duty at Fort Eutis, Va,
for Is days, effective April =; Ma
poleon III. stanton, assigned to the
42Sth infantry. colored; Harry y.
Vanstrum, relieved of assignment
to the 75Sth salvage company
Second Lieuts. John J. Murphy.
relieved of attachment to the 3rd
coast artillery district; Harold w.
Retter, relieved Of attachment to
the Bird coast artillery district; Will
liam ]. Turner, jr., attached 20 the
Send cavalry division; Martin A.
Ryan, attached to- 3rd coast artil-
lery district.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1926-03-30

,"Foiled"' cried Washington 5000
bootleggers as they read the news
from the Treasury.
From the office of Brig. Gen.
Lincoln c. Andrews, assistant Sec
rotary OF the Treasury and high
commissioner of Volsteadry, there
issued notes Of happy, carefree
laughter For General Andrews had
at last knocked bootleggerdom for
row of nonrefillable bottles.
In one fell sWoop Of the Andrews
pen an order was signed permitting
the Anheuser-Busch Company of ST.
Louis and the Pabst Company of
Milwaukee TO manufacture and dis.
tribute malt liquor containing 375
per cent alcohol to be offered for
sale as a tonic.
Washington drug stores will have
the tonic for sale in a few days,
and one doesn't need a prescrip-
ton to buy it. And remember-it
Is to be used for medicinal pur-
poses only.
The tonic--Or If you want to call
1t beer. go ahead-contains rs per
cent of malt solids, which are al
legged to make the liquor unfit for
beverage purposes. But who wants
a tonic for beverage purposes
General?
Wholesalers will be permitted to
sell the tonic in five-case lots
weekly to small druggists, and in
lots OF 20 cases to the larger firms,
Ana don't forget-n0 prescription
Is required
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1926-03-30
KILL WILD BOAR
IN BLUE RIDGE

BLUEMoNT, Va. March 3d.
Wild boar hunting in the Blue
Ridge mountains, so miles from
Washington, Is not an usual sport.
But yesterday company Of hunt
ers composed OF w. w. Carroll, J..
T.. Carroll, J. s. Sickle, Thomas
Poston. Thomas Mccarthy, and r..
Il. Carroll, after several hours OF
chase, ran down q boar that
weighted 400 pounds.
Six years ago the hog left the
farm OF its owner, w. w. Carroll,
and escaped into the mountains
about three miles from Mt Wealth
er. the abandoned Government
weather station. The animal was
sighted on several. occasions, but
only recently were there indications
Of Just where he made his home.
The hunters were accompanied by
two dogs. one a large hound OF
Walker strain, the other valuable
Airedale. During the capture the
board killed the Airedale.
It took "a shots from a Marlin,
a .3S Colt and from three shot guns
to dispatch the huge animal
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1926-03-30
HARVARD GRADS
DYING OUT

CAMBRIDGE, Mass, March 90
The old-time custom OF Harvard
graduates to hurry and enroll their
baby boys in the proper freshmen
classes at Harvard, viii soon pass
into history for the simple reason
there win be no boy children, ac-
cording to the prediction OF John
C. Phillips, Harvard graduate and
1tatistician.
And there viii not be any girl
children to enroll at Radcliffe, either.
sThe most disquieting feature OF
the investigation of Harvard grad
uates,'' says Phillips in the Har-
ward Graduates Magazine, lis the
rapidly increasing proportion Of
childless marriages from about Is
per cent in the decade 1S51-1S60. to
% per cent in the decade 1S91-19oO,
and the rise is still progressing.
The expert blames actual mat.
ing sterility,'' the constitutional
inferiority of the race as a whole, .
and the frequency OF divorce and
separation by married couples.
Each family" he concludes,
would have to produce 1852 chill
drer in order to keep the Harvard
stock stationary instead Of the
2.33 children produced by Harvard
Graduates today
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1926-03-30
FINDING Things

I've been wanting bicycle trip
for a long, long time, your honor,
and when the defendant offered
to sell me an almost brand new
one, with a bell and lamp, and
everything on il, FOR q dollar, !
took the money I'd just been paid
for my paper route, and bought
IT.
Didn't you get suspicious at
his selling it $50 cheap
Not at first / didn't--all I
thought Of was, WIS going to.
have real bicycle at last. /
didn't have room to think of any
thing else. was just in a hurry
TO get on the bicycle and ride.
Then one Of the boys said: Geel
You're a simp! That wheel is
worth $3O--he wouldn't sell 1t that
cheap II it belonged TO him. Bet
he stole 1t. So then went back
and tried to find the boy, but
he'd gone. Then I found whore
he lived, and / rode over there.
1t was quite q long way, and !
was glad Of 1t. because It gave.
me q chance to ride the wheel q
little, anyway. They said he
wasn't there, but he'd be In about
5 O'Clock. went back there at
S, and then / went again at q.
and he wasn't in. So then ]
rode over to No. police station
and left the wheel there. The boy
1t belonged to came around and
claimed it.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1926-03-30
GUARD GUNNERS
PLAN DANCE

The 26Oth coast artillery, local
national guard, is planning a dance
at, their armory, Water and o
Streets, Southwest the night OF
April s. The committee is Ser
geants Thomas NY Lynch. Cecil w.
Burden, Justin A, Shook, Edward
Reinmuth and Corporal Leonard
Cooper, with Corporal d. J. Nc
Carthy. chairman.
Several changes in the dates for
summer encampments OF the local
guard have been approved. The
260th coast artillery will train at
Fort Monroe, Va, August 8 TO ~;
the 18th military police company
will train at Virginia Beach. Va.
yAugust 16 to 20; the engineer reg1-
ment will be at Fort Humphreys,
Va. from August Is to 20.
The next assembly of the 18th
division staff, national guard of
the District, Maryland and Vir-
ginia. will be held in Washington.
on June 5. The staff viii work
out a war-game problem being pre-
pared by Major Louis C. Brinton'
u. s. A. instructor.
The headquarters detachment,
special troops, expects to be mus
tered into Federal service tonight.
Lieut.. Daniel 3. Lloyd will COM
mand with the following men al
ready enrolled: K. J. Bushman,
Howard M. Johnson. Edward L.
Hunter. III. G. Lynch and z. J.
Mccarthy. Eight men are allowed
the unit
Lieut.. Raymond NJ. Peak, 29th
military police has been commits
stoned captain in the local guard.
The unit is planning an entertain
ment and supper following their
drill Thursday night as a farewell
testimonial to Lieut.. Daniel b.
Lloyd.
Having qualified by competitive
examination for promotion oy
commission In the coast artillery,
Sergeants E. s. Thompson, OF Bat
terry B, and ]. W. Crockett, or
Battery A. have been placed on the
eligible list
The following men OF Company
G have been ordered honorably dis
charged: Privates John F. Bur-
leigh. Willis A. Finch, John ].
Kelleher, walter A. Metz. Charles
A. Nell and Paul C. DeVault. Men
OF other units have been ordered
honorabIy discharged are: Prfvates
Arden H. Schweinfert, headQuart-
ers and service. company; Eldon L.
Mosling, Ira F.. Mcmillan and
Frederick p. Hurley. of Company
d; Edwin A. Burgess and Raymond
L. Hays OF headquarters and serv-
Ice company.
william G. ROBBERY has been pro-
NOTED TO private first-class with
the 29th military police company.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1926-03-30

realizes that never viii ne &c
Big Collar and Shirt Man. Saddest
OF all, unless the coming years. are
more successful than present ones
have proved, the ashes OF at least
one Chinese viii not be exported to
his beloved native land for final
repose amid ancestors, temples, joss
and rice offerings.
For months All Fun has attended
the Washington Chinese public
school and tried his best to conquer
that mysterious English language
with its equally mysterious letter
writing characters. His formal
notice of bankruptcy reads as IL
little learning had made him mad.
But his heart and ideas are all
right could he but express himself.
It is not hard to translate what
he has heavily on his mind. Per-
ilaps 1t means: Everyone take
notice! I, All Fun Loon, am forced
into bankruptcy. / win be succeed
ed by a well-known Chinese laundry
man. bespeak your patronage Tor
this new linen masseur. The new
management has not yet arrived.
We can't say how sorry we are not
to be able to longer serve you. /
will be here each evening at z
o'clock to cash in your laundry
slips. We thank you for your
former patronage"
Simple and pathetic, isn't It? And,
alas, All Foon, following the ex.
ample of his American friends, has
been looking upon the near-rice
wine when it was speediest. Last
night his puzzled head was down
on the counter beside the notice of
his failure. Asked what his name
was he sleepily replied:
go Bust" The name Of his sue
cessor he declared. also, was
go Bust"
All Fun Loon may have busted in
the laundry business and been shy
on English, and backward generally,
but he's a whale Of a success on
American slang as she is spoke.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1926-03-30
Dry Agents Who Drink
evidence" Called
Immoral

HAMMOND, Ind, March 80.
Direct charges of immortality
were fired at prohibition en-
forcement by attorneys for Ar
thur Schupp and Forrest Smith,
charged with violation of the
law, in Federal court here today.
The charges were based on the
buying and drinking of liquor
by prohibition agents just to
obtain a conviction.
"That practice is immoral.
Why should a prohibition agent
be permitted to buy liquor and
drink it and tell about it in
open court with immunity when
nobody else can buy it and
drink it without running a
chance of going to jail"
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1926-03-30
Idiot Child Is Cured
By Gland Grated
From Slayer

LILLE, France, March 30.-A
Thyroid glad taken from MUIR
derer who died by the guillo-
tine was grated into the body
of an IDIOT girl one year ago,
has has caused the child to be-
come absolutely normal, accord
ing to doctors LeFort and
Piquet.
The report of the doctors was
made today when they examined
the girl on the anniversary of
the operation.
The child was given up by
physicians who pronounced her
q congenital idiot. She is now
three and half years old, and
walks, talks and plays normal
ly.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1926-03-30
A Fashion Hint

81 was in a kind OF hurry
the other morning to get down
town and open my haberdashery
shop. There was policeman
standing by the door and he said,
Someone's opened 1t already,
only they opened it from the
back. There wasn't anything
taken but a dozen neckties."
Defendant: 81 was invited to a
party, your honor, and the only
-necktie ] had was one ] got for
Christmas"
The cop (mumbling): Poor
devil"
The court: But why did you
take so many?"
well, / didn't have time to look
at 'em very carefully, and
wanted to be sure I'd have one
to suit me-"
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1926-03-30
WALES IS RECOVERING
FROM EAR OPERATION

LONDON, March 30.-The Prince
Of Wales is making progress and is
no longer in pain, his physicians
stated today. No further bulletins
are considered necessary. The light
operation for an abscess in his left
ear will not impair the princes
hearing.
The prince is remaining at York
House. and it is probable that for
several days he will be kept in doors
TO avoid the possibility of catching
cold in the wound
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1926-03-30
GROCER PAYS $25 FINE
FOR DIRT IN HIS STORE

On charges OF maintaining an
insanitary grocery store at 14O1
Sixth st. N. W.. Harry Goodman,
was fined SIS by Judge George H
Macdonald in Police Court today.
The defendants only plea was
that ne was too busy to keep his
store clean. According to evidence
the floors, walls, sink, Ice box.
soda fountain and chicken coop
were dirty.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1926-03-30

The notice Of failure in It's en-
tirety is as follows:
Everybody looking here. am
TO bust. The must go out. We are
have some is Importance new sinese.
We are the wait for me. / hope
you come back again. Speak me
please. But the manage is not home.
We are Of the excuse but not tell.
1t understands everything. / am TO
be here at o'clock. Here are my
compliments to we"
All Fun Loon is done for. He
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1926-03-30
I Wanted to Get One That Suited

ANY one so particular about
haberdashery should keep out Of
stores at midnight. You're likely
to find yourself wearing a kind
of haberdashery that will suit you
even less than the Christmas tie.
It's a kind of zebra effect, and
you'll wear the same style for
good many years without any va,
ration. But I'll try you out with
a years probation first"
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1926-03-30
60 NS0DAT Ed
CHANCE OPENS

ny International NEWS DekyAcS
NEW YORK, March 3O.-Tradlng
was resumed on the Consolidated
Exchange Of New York today, fol
lowing the dismissal Of the injunc-
ton proceedings brought under the
anti-stock-fraud act and the consent
OF $50 members to abide BY the re-
organization plan Of the Exchange.
The plan Of reorganization, which
was drawn up by influential meme
bers Of the Consolidated, I'm CONSUL
tation with the State Attorney
Generals office, contain number
90 regulations designed to prevent
objectionable practices held TO be
In violation OF the Martin act,
Under the reorganization the
members guarantee to provide
actual delivery Of stock within "a
hours after d trade; brokers win
keep in their possession money or
securities equal to the aggregate Of
their customers commitments; pur-
ctases will be be made In TIE open
market and regulated by competi-,
tive bidding and there shall be no
wash sales" put through by Gross
entries" In books where neither
money nor securities change hands.
- 80. - - -
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1926-03-30
SOVIET BANS DISPLAY
OF ACTRESS FLESH

LENINGRAD. March 30,-No
bare flesh above the knees and
none below the col1arbone may be
shown by actresses in Soviet NOV.
ing pictures, according to a decree
issued by the Central Bureau of
the moving picture section.
An exception Is allowed "only in
those cases where It is justified
by artistic necessity"
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1926-03-30
Chin csc Laundryn1an
Admits He Is Broke

AVA Fun Loon gone bankruptcy most polite,
honest Chinese fashion broke and wants everybody
Therefore, of his NICE clean laundry
ct Fourteenth ST. N W., he has posted little slgn
in his very best pdgn English to the effect that
81 am to bust very words patiently scrawled
IN his handwriting
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1926-03-30
POET DsAlvNGJIlzI0 GAINS
mi BATTLE WITH ri lJ''

ROME. March 80 Gabriel a An.
nunzio. Italian novelist. poet ana
war hero. who ii suffering from
influenza, was much improved 70.
day.
Physicians stated that the poet
had passed comfortable night and
taken nouribhnent this morning
His condition Is not now serious.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1926-03-30
Iowa Circle Meeting

The Iowa Circle Citizens Associa.
ton will meet at o'clock tonight
In the lecture room of the North
minister Church, Eleventh and
Rhode Island Avenue Northwest.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1926-03-30

With a. production Of 100000
tons OF coal and Ignite last year
France established a new high
record.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1926-03-30
JOT NlGS FROM
ALEXANDRIA

ALEXANDRIA, Va, March so.
Three northhound Florida tourists
were badly Injured this morning
when a small sedan driven by Ken
meth D. Marks, 1888 Druid Park
Drive, Baltimore, slidded off the
Richmond Washington Highway
near Accotink, hit pole and turned
turtle. Louis Nahas. North Bur-
gundy, NJ. j., and =. j. Walsh,
Boston. who were in the automo-
bile, were badly cut on the face
and head. Marks was also badly
cut.
They said that they left st.
Petersburg. Fla, Saturday night,
and had taken turns driving the car
while two slept. It is believed that
Marks was mapping when the car
left the road. They were brought
to Alexandria by a passing motorist.
Justice A. b. NicoI presided in
police court this. morning in the
absence OF Judge Snow. Sophie
Caprolletti, a6, was found guilty Of
shopIifting and fined $25 and costs.
Thomas Dawson, charged with as
saulting his wife, was given 80
days and sentence suspended. James
Meeks, charged with violating the
dry ordinance, was fined $90.5O.
The spring tourist season opened
here yesterday when more than
z, 900 Ohio school children visited
the Masonic Temple and Christ
Church, on their way to Mount
Vernon. 1t Is expected that nearly
SO. 900 sightseers win visit the city
during the next three weeks.
The United Charities Board win
close its offices in the city hall
April l.
Mayor w. A. Smoot has sent q
communication to Commissioners
fleming thanking him for the as.
sistance rendered by the fireboat
and engine companies Nos is and
IL at the feed mill fire Sunday
morning. Police are investigating
the cause Of the fire, incendiarism
being suspected.
Robert s.. Barrett, prominent local
financter has returned from the
Orient. He left shortly after Christ
mas to visit Japan.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1926-03-30
MALT TONIC
BACK AGAIN

Beer. beer, beautiful beer
Filling the hearts of the millions
with cheerI
Though It's ironic, return as a tonic
Or any old monicker. just so you're
herei
From complete works Of A. J.
Volstead.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1926-03-30

In converting b piece OF steel
into needle Il passes through 20
processes In the hands Of 10 per.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1926-03-30
A Chance . Ride De WheeI

Defendant: II found the bicycle.
your honor
A COnffning Disease
That's what you're charged
with. Finding things Is a bad
habit to get into. Tt grows on you.
First you stumble over things
unexpectedly, next you begin
going out OF your way to find
them, and then you acquire such
a craving to find things that
YOU end up with blowing open a
safe to find something really
worth while. And then the sher-
lie finds you. Where was this
bicycle when you found tin
somebody's cellar?
Nom. / found It in q vacant
lot. There were three other boys
with me. They said thay bet
the wheel was bandoned. Il IT
was 'bandoned and found It.
then of course, it belonged to
me-"
And supposing it wasn't ahan-
doned?"
ssThen I made a mistake in
carrying it off.
Don't make any more mis-
takes like that II you want to
live at home with your father
and mother the next few years:
Come in a week from today ana
I'll tell you what the investiga-
ting officer reports about you.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1926-03-30

The United Charities Board win
close its offices in the city hall
April 1.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1926-03-30

WITH THE
ALBI ARTISTS, R.
Being a Few Excerpts
From the Daily Routine
of Juvenile Court in the
District of Columbia,
Presided Over BY
Judge Kathryn Sellers
The Boy Of Today Is the
Nation Of Tomorrow
By Donald Med Ougal
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1926-03-30
Paper Profits

every day for a week, your
honor, we brought that newspa-
per rack in, and all the papers
were gone, but there wasn't any
pennies in the money box. They
sent me down there to watch, and
Yesterday the defendant took all
the papers out Of the rack and
went down to the corner half
a block away. and started sell
ing them. He'd sold three when
I arrested him."
Defendant: THAT wasn't no
place for a newspaper rack. They
never sold more than a dozen
papers a month there. 1t should
a been half a block further down,
where people passed going to the
lunch room.
IT saw a lot of people stop
and look around before they went
in for their breakfast, so one
morning ] took all the papers
out of the rack and carried them
down to the corner. sold them
ALI in half an hour. Those papers
weren't any good the way they
had EN-"
They weren't any good to the
owner the way you had EN-. This
Is your first offense, and I'm go
ing to let you down easy, but If
you come up again, I'll send you
down. Probation for one year,
Mr.. Clerk"
New Britain herald., 1926-01-30
HERALD CAMERA-MEN TELL THEIR STORY

NHNAIAHaBlMINNHMUn MUnHnHM
New Britain herald., 1926-01-30

An illness disclosed the secret which Dr. M. Y, Mayfeld (aboyel of Nena, Ark, had successful! guarded for twenty-five years. It was discovered shc was not { man, as she had posed, but |; normal woman. She is 7t.
The Washington times., 1926-02-08
MAY BAR KIN OF.
CLEMENCEAU

Deportation proceedings instituted
against Georges Ferdinand Louis
...ndre Gatineau. said to be a grand
son of former Premier Georgs3;
Clemenceau. of France, probably VII.
re re iewed by the board of re-
&iew II the DEPARTMENT of Labor.
officials said today.
Papers in the case have not yet
reached Washington.
Gatineau is under arrest in Seattle
and is being held for deportation
10 France on the ground that he
IS in this country uniawfully.
The record shows Gatineau en-
tered this country at New Orleans
on Nav g. 1924. for two weeks
stay. A warrant for 'his arrest was
issued at the request of w. w. Tut
tie. immigration commissioner at
New. Orleans. who learned Gatineau
had taken up permanent residence
IN Seattle.
His claim that he had applied for
his first papers as an American
citizen would not bar his deporta-
lion. officials said.
The Washington times., 1926-02-08
VETS To CHANGE:
INSURANCE

The privilege Of renewing Govern
ment Ward Risk Insurance expires
July 2. A carefully prepared plan
of converting this wartime insur-
ance into one of Theses six old-line
understandings life, 20-payment
life, S0tpayinent life. 20-year en-
dowment. 30-year endowment and
endowment at the age of 62-has
been worked out by the Veterans
Bureau.
Veterans who make application
for this conversion or renewal must
be In good health at the time the
application is made. Should the
veteran be suffering from any dis
ease or disability, occurring since
the lapse in his wartime insurance
that reduces his instability. he
will not be granted the new insur-
ance, with but one exception: If
the disease or disability is the re-
suit of the World War, and lapse
has not exceeded two years, the
veteran viii be allowed to renew his
policy if he pays the entire
premium covering the period of
lapse. together with per cent in.
terest compounded on the premium.
IA specimen table @of monthly
rates per $1,000 follows.
The Washington times., 1926-02-08

SAM HERMAN
who can get real music out of
the xylOphOne. He's coming to
the Auditorium, matinee and
evening, February ID, with the
Eight Popular Victor Artists"
who, incidentally, are never heard
over the radio.