davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington times., 1926-04-27
$l,OOO,OOO Lost in D. c. in
Fake Stocks i'm 1925

The Better Business Of Washington estimates that
900 from District people during the
ended April l. 1895 through unsound investments
Women Government employees said to be the largest
losers from fake schemes which they have invested
What we should have blue sky law that will prevent
fake stock financial manpuators generally doing
business unless they wish to to the pententar for
Congress has long had this matter before it, but always
fds some for passing the right sort Of legislation
Washington is an good field for fakirs who find it
difficult safely do business in many other cities There
are large workers in the Government de-
partnents and who willing to take chances
They few dollars they spare and there is always
before them the recollection that fortunes have been made from
small beginnings and small investments They without
advisers listen the smooth tongues Of shrewd statesmen
"easy mark investors in these wildcat concerns that
steal everything they get their hands will any
bank or investment house in Washington before putting
money in oil and other schemes they will get sound advice
that will prevent their losing their money
Many of those lose through these adventures de-
poors in local banks The officials of those banks al
ways accessible them Many Of the banks Of Washington
have officials whose is give advice sound in
yestments officials must keep free from connections
with corporations that would improperly influence them in
offering advice
The banking investment houses Of Washington know
the evils Of wildcat financing They solid institutions,
people invested that would bring good returns and
that the money would remain here instead Of being dpated
by crooks.
ed in the right direction and give honest advice that
win lead to profitable investment
Be careful of anybody trying to sell you getrichquck
stocks you've got money to throw away and do
what happens it, then waste your time these slick fell
lows who fill you with glowing promises Of fortunes to be
made out Of nothing you haven't money to throw away
and you safely invest what you've got go any
banking institution Washington and ask to the official
enntabe investment hon.e With sr,anant Sfcas IN ush
ngton, or to the Better Business Bureau.
The Washington times., 1926-04-27

the street so that all the neigh
bors knew that Company was
Coming.
You kids were taken in hand.
too. You were basted and scrub
bed and shined along with the
roast, the, floor and the silver.
You were instructed in ali the
81 points of Company Manners.
Company Manners-What weird
and wonderful rites they were.
How unnaturally, hideously good
and polite the whole family was
when Company Came. No grab
bling or sassing or smacking OF
ears-you never left the fish bait
i'm the parlor-Dad always wore
boiled shirt and his best suit and
Ma took her hair out of curl
papers before breakfast. Yep,
the family certainly strutted its
stuff when Company came.
/ think that's the way most or
US feel about life after death.
We're not quite certain where 1t
will be or how we'll get there.
But we're darned sure of one
thing-IT WILL BE A PLACE
WHERE WE'LL USE OUR COM
PANY MANNERS.
When we get to that Place We'll
cut out the grabbing and nagging.
We won't tell fibs or peddle dirt
We won't even want to. For
Wen be all made over in That
Place. Clever, patient and kind,
wise and witty, tolerant and help
fuI-that's what we'll be in That
Place. All made over so we
won't even recognize our own
selves-just like we were when
Company Came.
That's our idea of what will
Happen to us in the long For
evermore which lies ahead of
this little span of years.
Funny idea!
An absurd and impossible idea,
if we but stopped to anayze it.
and an utterly undesirable idea.
The Washington times., 1926-04-27
NEGOTIATIONS
OF A WIFE

The Mountaineering Wife

What every man, either con.
sciously or sub-consiciously, 10
looking for is a mountaineering
wife.
You know the kind 1 mean!
A wife whose chatter won't inter-
fere with his reading Of the news
paper at breakfast. and whose
love Of an argument won't inter
fere with his digestion at dinner.
\
Whose religious principles won't
interfere with his Sunday golf
and whose suspicion won't inter-
fere with his Saturday night
Man is a peace.loving animal
and what he wants is a wife
whose social ambitions and dane
ing dates won't interfere with his
evenings rest-and whose nightly
QUESTIONABLE won't interfere with
his sleep.
The kind whose boiler-plate
housekeeping won't interfere with
his comfort or his right to pur
his feet on the chairs-and, whose
espionage won't Interfere with
his little amusements.
A wife whose sense OF hume"
won't upset his amour propre-
and whose Scotch conscience
won't interfere with his good
times.
A woman whose scruples won't
put a blight on his little bachelor
habits-and whose prejudices
won't brighten off all his bachelor
friends.
Whose sensitiveness won't in
terfere with his expressing his
honest opinion Of her-and whose
vanity won't interfere with his
admiration Of other women or his
monopoly of the bathroom
mirror.
Whose opinions won't interfere
with his infallible deductions--and
whose mental brillancy won't in
terfere with his superiority
complex
Whose honesty won't interfere
with his "policies"-and whose
perspicacity won't interfere with
his alib@
X X
A MOUNTAINEERING wife!
That's what every man wants! A
wife, like \ his watch. always
handy when she is wanted. and
never in the way when she isn't
wanted.
X X X
All he asks of a woman is that
she love him a little, trust iii'I
lOt-and LET HIM ALONE! Bat
that, my hearties, is asking for
a miracle!
The Washington times., 1926-04-27
DR. FRANK CRANES
DAILY EDITORIAL


- cArrrn ~ on eminent scientist other day, who
is widely known his discoveries was curious 20
see him. for I had good idea ABOUT now Ne Vusns
to look. ,n.,
n Ala not look that way at ALL His is Dr. Mllkan
f the California Institute Technology He looked IKE
an successful business man who mgn1 nave
kept barber shop Oshkosh, might nave Deen ia"S
in Kokomo.
beroioov Int never could see anything in It. saw
man sitting on platform in Worcester VINO hau al
the earmarks of criminal He had WIDE narng ears anu
A bumpy head and altogether looked TT TOT treason
stratagems and spoils asked companion s''ns neA.
to me who he and was informed tna1 ne "as P
of the board of education
have talked with President Coolidge who cnated ABOUT
like anyone else altogether struck me as looking anu
acting like modest Massachusetts, lawyer There were
no elements in of the heroic or the majestic tna1
could See He was just plain, ordinary man
When Won get close to Judge Gary you find him just
as human and communicable as anyone You mns
There is nothing Napoleonlc or byrGnc q = Il
the head Of the largest trust In the world
I was surprised to find that Il G. Wells was very
commonplace looking sort of He might have been
clerk in grocery store or floor walker IN department
store He talked about his children and things OF oa
life inst about as anybody would He had no philosophical
reflections to offer had expected to meet man VINO
would lombard with conceptions OF the future World
or strange notions and socialistic ideas.
Mr. Chesterton impressed differently from hundred
other Englishmen had met large beefeatlng person,
although an interesting and humorous personality; nothing
to suggest the brilliant essayist that he IS
The only statesman ever saw that looked like states
man or noble and grand person was Earl Grey All the
others have seen quite commonplace
The most statesmanike looking man ever met was
hotel keeper of the most amazing personages that
has swum across my ken butcher by profession
Altogether this physiognomy science has me nopeiessY
confused.
dread to meet great and prefer to retain my
preconcepon of him and not have corrected by the
facts in the case as my preconception is always
Qrandiose wonderful while the facts are likely TO DO
Disappointing
So T found w R. Hearst Of whom had heard amazing
things large placid resembling Iowa farmer he
was soft voiced noncontentious and neither drank nor
smoked.
George Barrere the best futist heard looked like
a Methodist preacher from Indiana.
In fact do not remember seeing anyone who looked
the part
The Washington times., 1926-04-27

not within the limits of the pos
sible, but there is traditional, if not
historic. evidence that such thing
has happened.
Thousan ds of years ago, in the
Peloponnesus, people thought that
they saw a flaming object leap
from the moon and fall upon the
earth. 1t was a meteoric stone,
afterward venerated under the
name of the 'Nemaean Lion
The apparent formation Of the
drop at the lower edge OF the
moon would not be inconsistent
with the meteoric hypothesis, for
it might be only an impression,
but as soon as we consider the
appearance of some fifteen sue
cessive drops, we have to look
for another explanation. And a
very plausible one Immediately
offers itself:
1t being near midnight, in mid
winter, in central New York, a
time, place and season in which
buffalo robes" alone can keep
folks out of doors from shivering.
even when snugly Enclosed two
by two in a swan-necked "cut-
ter" it must have been very cold
on that open porch under the
clear winter sky, with the moon
frigidly white. and the stars gilt
tering like frost crystals. Cold
like that, as we'll remember
from early experience, brings
tears into the eyes, especially
when one is looking at a dazzling
moon.
An Illusion
When a crying child looks
through bubbling tears at it's
mothers face the refracting drops
may make the mother herself APP
pear to be weeping in sympathy.
A film OF moisture, or a few win
when directed to a bright moon
might produce the semblance of
drops forming and falling.
Some very interesting and in
forming experiments could easily
be tried to determine this. Singu-
larly enough, this suggestion re-
calls another fancy of Poe, de-
tailed in his story of 1.-THE
Sphinx" in which the monstrous
deception produced by a minute
insect crawling on an invisible
spiders line close to an imagina
tive observers eye, Is set forth
most entertainly. Q
There are other possible ex-
plantations, based upon atmos-
pheric phenomena, into which
shall not enter here.
may add that it goes almost
without saying. from simply read
ing Mr.. Lanpher's letter, that he
is man who is capable of seeing
things with the imagination as
we'll as with the eyesight, and of
such is the kingdom of the in
tellectual elite.
The Washington times., 1926-04-27
MOON DROPS
By Garrett P. Serviss

This letter has been forwarded
to me:
IT saw in the paper recently
an article about earth and moon
play by Garrett P. Serviss. Now
would like to ask him If he
can explain what l and a COM
pany of friends saw Of the moon
one night. l think it was 80 or
40 years ago.
"It was a very clear night,
with full moon very large and
bright, about II o'clock in mid
winter. We had been making an
evening call and as we started
for home we stood on the porch
talking. / was looking at the
moon. All at once a great, large
drop formed on the under side
of the moon, and kept growing
larger and larger until it got so
large it dropped off. and as it
fell it left a tail behind it.
LAS it went down 1t kept
growing smaller and smaller until
it went out. And just before
it went out another one formed
and dropped. off, and there was
about Is of those that dropped
off the moon at that time.
expected to see something in the
papers concerning it, but never
have, neither have / ever heard
Of anyone else seeing it.
GEORGE j. LANPHER,
Marathon. N. Y"
THIS recalls the opening stanza
l. of Poe's fantastic poem, 1.-THE
Sleeper"
"At midnight in the month of
June,
I stand beneath the mystic moon,
An Opiate vapor, dewy, dim,
Exhales from out her golden rim,
And softly dripping, drop by drop
Upon the quiet mountain top,
Steals droWsily and unsteady
Into the universal valley"
Mr.. Lanpher, although he ex-
pected to read something about
the phenomenon in the news
papers, neglects to tell us whether
his friends talking with him on
the porch saw what he saw.
have no reason, however, for
suspecting that he did not him
self actually see what he de-
scribes. Seeing is believing, but
seeing is not proving.
Eyes Deceive Us
1t is our misinterpretations OF
the reports Of our eyes that de-
ceive us. Mr.. Lanpher saw some
thing bright apparently falling
from the moon, and it looked to
him like a drop. Let us go no
farther for the moment. The sug.
gestion Immediately comes to the
mind that it might have been a
meteor. That a meteor might
really start into sight on its down.
ward flight so close to the moon
as to seem to have been flung by
the hand Of the queen Of night, is
The Washington times., 1926-04-27
Human SemaphOres
They Are Interested in Your Own Well Being

You have encountered them-these helpless human
phorepoed street vain warnings to impatient
pedestrians
Perhaps you too have than fretfuly lodged
around the extended extended through courtesy
caution and restrain.
Helpless human semaphores They can't forcbly stop the
foohardy aywker but must stand and shake their heads
his reckless defiance of traffic and death.
Major Hesse hasn't posted his policemen for
civic adornments They aren't there annoy you with
needless delays They there to PREVENT ACCIDENTS
and PROTECT HUMAN LIFE.
There isn't any law that allows make you heed
their Warnings-as yet But heed them, anyway
The Washington times., 1926-04-27
By ELSIE ROBINSON

, us He is doing it NOW. II there
are mysteries and miracles to be
faced-they are coming Off NOW.
This moment in which you and
I are living-this actual second
is as important, as significant.
as any moment which will ever
happen to you. It holds as much
heaven as any moment will ever
hold-as much Of hell. Perhaps
your troubled eyes cannot see
to the shining height of that
heaven, nor penetrate to the
core Of that hell-but both heaven
and hell are there, nevertheless.
and you are moving between
Does it seem a strange idea
to you? Does it bother you and
upset all your plans? It shouldn't.
It's as easy to understand as the
passage of a bird through the air.
The bird goes on and on. 1t
passes through sunshine and rain,
through storm and quiet-and all
that passage is part of one SuS-
tanned flight.
So does your spirit go on and
on, breathing new planes, swoop-
ing from one experience to an
other. There's no sudden, definite
transition which abruptly trans
forms your humdrum self into a
shiny saint all dolled up in COM
pany manners.
You're the same questing spirit
at any point in your long flight
through eternity.
II things are ever going to be
important to you, they're impor-
tant NOW. And if you're ever
going to be important to things
you'd better hop on the job NOW.
FOR THIS PLACE IS YOUR
ETERNITY. AND COMPANY
HAS COME.
The Washington times., 1926-04-27

no you remem-
II her what a
fuss there used to
be when Company
Was Coming?
Out came the
best sheets. the
ecial pillow
cases with the
crocheted lace on
the hens that
Aunt Emma had
made, the silk
patchwork COM
forter that was
used on tremen-
d Gus occasions.
The six Real Sill
yer spoons were
unwrapped a n d
shined. For hours
the kitchen sim
mered with bak-
ing and boiling
and the scent of
burnt offerings
--o~% nvN on1 1nVHyF1
The Washington times., 1926-04-27
LISTEN. WORLD!

Gould anything
b . more awful
t h an to wear
Company M an.
ners throughout
all e ter nit y.
Nothing could.
Ge tie old
Luther Burbank,
who lived so close
to life, had a bet
ter idea
1--WE ARE IN
E T e r NIT Y
n o VIZ s aid
Luther Burbank.
No waiting for
c o m p a ny to
Come. No prinp-
ing up to look
pre- ty if any
angels happen to
drop in. If there
are angels they
are wi t h us
I NOW. If God is
"A
The Washington times., 1926-04-27
DEAR MRS. BEECKMAN:

nEAR MRS. BEECKMAN:
~ My employer is out of town
a great deal. He is in the habit
of praisirg my work when he re-
turns The other day he passed
this remark: II want you to
know. Miss. that / certainly
appreciate the way you carried on
the business when l was absent
from the office"
VIVA: 40 you think would be an
appropriate reply for me to make?
(2) Is Il proper for a young man
to walk between two ladies whom
he is taking out, or should the
young man always walk on the
outside? A. M.
1T is a delight to have you write
j us that your employer appre.
ciates your good work. Good for
you, and good for him. Employers
are so often caught in the rush OF
work that they forget to comment
on the cooperation Of their en-
ployes. Therefore, since he does
have the thought to tell you Of his
gra attitude. say. THANK you very
much. Nj Worth, 1t is very kind
Of you to tell me" Or "You are
very kind to tell me so, Mr.. Worth.
appreciate it very much" or
Thank you 7 am so happy that
my work plea ses you
please tell me If there is any
other way in which ] can CO.
operate" or Thank you" I en-
joy the work so much thai it
makes me very happy THAI you
are satisfied with my work"
2. He should walk on the side
Of the pavement nearest the curb
whether he is with one lady
or two ladies.
nEAR MRS. BEECKMAN:
~ If the groom is going to
wear a Tuxedo suit. should the
best man wear . Tuxedo?
2. What kind Of collar and tie
should the groom wear?
3. Is it proper to wear a straw
hat if the wedding is to take place
in June, or soft felt hat?
l.. Il. S.
Yes. But YOU know that
Tuxedo suit is not correct. Full
dress should be, worn for an eve
ming wedding.
.. Wing collar and black how
tie are worn with a tuxedo.
). Either Is correct in summer.
The Washington times., 1926-04-27
TIMELY HINTS
TO CLERK
Mrs. Cornelius Beeckman

DLEASE may 1 urge the writer
i of the letter below and all
other readers not to use the ex-
preston passed a remark" This
expression is crude and awkward,
and will stamp you at once as not
conversant with good usage. 1t is
one of those revealing phrases that
we must especially avoid. And
how much easier simply to say
Said" If you have this express
sion in your vocabulary, cast it
nnfi
New Britain herald., 1926-12-01

The new bloused line at the hips is undeniably flattering. It lends grace to tall angular type of figure on account of the loose, soft folds at the hip-line. This silhouette is also extremely kind to a full figure as the graceful folds of the bodice and the bloused effect at the waist successfully conceal too generous supply of curves. In addition, this line is distinctly feminine in effect and far more sophisticated than the conventional straight-line contours.
 A distinguished example of this new line is the black velvet after noon frock shown in the sketch today. Here the bodice blouses slightly over a girdle that swathes the hips, crossing in front through a jeweled clasp. The tight portion at the hips makes more apparent the looseness of the bodice just above and the full center section of the skirt.
 Addition desirable features are the raglan cut of the sleeves and the scalloped edge of both the skirt and sleeves.
 The only ornaments on this black velvet afternoon frock are the white flower on the bodice and the jewelcd buckle holding the girdle in front.
 Copyright, 1926 (EFs)
New Britain herald., 1926-12-01

at the Wallack mills had liked her warm and loving and sweet in her that could not be hidden. Some thing that reached out for friend Illness from people and got it, usually.
 They came to the Arbor street flat for lunch, leaving their shin ing expensive cars parked in the street outside the jerry built red brick building.
 And, far from being ashamed of proud of it that day. For Suzanne and Daisy and Joan Hunter and Emily Dwycr exclaimed over the beautiful old pieces of mahogany. The four poster beds, the marble topped dreSsers, the wonderful tld silver with the Huntlcy crest upon it.
 "The Huutleys of Kentucky,' as Honey Lou's mother explained 10 them while Honey Lou wished she wouldn't. "They're almost the old est family down in the Blue Grass country Been there in the same old white house for almost two hundred years. Yes, indeed,"
 She did not say it in a bragging way, and Honey Lou was suddenly very, very proud of her as she saw Daisy Deane look from her crested
New Britain herald., 1926-12-01

Then, satisfied that all was well, he fell to picking up that buckwheat in the greediest way: and all the time he and Mrs. Grouse were talk ing in low tones. Farmer Browns Boy held his breath as he watched.
 At last Farmer Browns Boy had to change his position. He had sat so long in one position that he had become cramped. and he just had to move. Accidentally he snapped d dry twig. Instantly Mr. Grouse was all attention with his head up, his bright eyes staring suspiciously at those bushes behind which Farmer Browns Boy was hidding. Slowly he took a couple of steps in that direction. Then. through the bushes he saw Farmer Browns Boy. Farmer Browns Boy saw that he was discovered. He held his breath, waiting to see what Mir. Grouse would do. At the same time MT. Grouse looked as if he were holding his breath. He didn't move. Not so much as a feather did he move.
 By and by, after what seemed a long time, the feathers on the top of the head of Mir. Grouse began to go down. Then. as if not a suspicion had entered his head, he picked up a grain of bucliwhcat. To see him you wouldn't have known that he even suspected that Farmer Browns Boy was there. But he did know that Farmer Browns Boy was there and Farmer Browns Boy knew that he knew he was there. Farmer Browns Boy understood perfectly. He understood that MT. Grouse was bold with the boldness of understanding, and that this was his way of showing that he accepted Farmer Browns Boy as a friend. So Farmer Browns Boy took the greatest care to make no motion that might frighten Mr Grouse, and he resolved that he would be there the next morning.
 Copyright, 1926, by T. w. Burgess)
 The next story: "A Perfect Under- standing"
New Britain herald., 1926-12-01
Grandmother Knew

there was nothing so good for con- gCstion and colds as mustard. But the old-fashioned mustard plaster burned and bistered.
 MuSterolc gives the relief and help that mustard plastcrs gave, without the plaster and without the blister.
 IL is a clean, white ointment, made with oil of mustard. Gently rub 1t in. See how quickly the pain disappears.
 Try Musterole for sore throat, bronchitis tonsilitis. croup, stiff neck, asthma, neuralgia, headache, congestion, pLeurisy, rheumatism, lumbago. pains and aches of the back or joints, sprains sore muscles, bruises chilblains. frosted feet, colds of the chest Git may prevent pneu- monia.)
New Britain herald., 1926-12-01

Research Council of Great Britain as a part of an extensive series of studies of the child. The experi- ments were controlled, since they covered the observation of five or six hundred boys living in a colony near London.
 An analysis was first made of the amount of food which these boys were receiving under the standard diet and the average rate of growth. The diets were then modified by the addition of milk and butter in speci- fled amounts.
 Housing conditions were standard and did not vary. During four years records were made of the diet actu- ally consumed at the table by weigh ing sample amounts of the food daily for each of the three meals, and deducting the waste.
 It was found that these boys were taking from 1619 to 2154 calories per day. averaging 1916 calories, of which 1G per cent were protein, IS per cent fat and 6S per cent carbo- hydrates.
 Value of Cows Milk
 The diets were modified for groups of boys varying from 20 to 60 in a group by the addition of milk to the basic diet of castor sugar of butter. of vegetable margarine, of casein, and of watercress.
 It was found that almost invaria- bly there was no growth during sum- mer and usually more gain in weight at that season.
 The group to whom cows milk was given as an addition to the diet gained far more In both weight and height than did any of the others.
 This may be taken as another striking demonstration of the i'm portance of milk as a complete food and of the necessity that it form the basic substance In the diet of all growing children.