davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1926-08-26

COMPLICATED "HOBUN" MACHINE
The Japanese language like the Chinese language
picated
An educated to write Chinese Japanese really we'll
must know 5000 different letters Instead of taking twenty
six letters and manufacturing all the words with combinations
Of those letters the Chinese and japanese have separate
complicated character for each word and while they simplify
all they would take the average American certainly
twenty-five to learn to write the Chinese characters
that must be used by fairly well educated man.
By simplifying and eliminating the japanese managed
to produce tyepwrng machine for commercial Here
you see it with charming little japanese typist working
it.
This machine has 900 different characters letters You
Of them the base which machine
rest Compare that with machine twentyx letters plus
few punctuation and other characters.
The marvellous thing that this Japanese operator
in her head the 800 wordtrs of her machine knows their
location well that in spite of the handicap
can write from fortyfive to fifty words per minute.
We wonder that the Japanese do not at once abandon their
system Of writing and alphabet.
They wonder, perhaps that don't abandon out-of
date system OF weights and and adopt the decimal
systemA as we have accepted it in our money. =
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1926-08-26
By ELSIE ROBINSON

coed to kick us out of our beds
and monopolize the premises for
days and weeks, or even months?
Well, II we're the average Human
Sap, we do exactly nothing at all
about it. Except Talk.
But we never talk to them.
Oh, no indeedy! We talk before
they come and after they've gone
and out in the garage while
they're here. But we never.
never, NEVER stand right up In
front Of their faces and talk
where it will do any good.
But why shouldn't we? why
should we allow our plans to be
wrecked and our lives congested
by a lot of people who mean less
than nothing to all of us-Whom
we really intensely dislike, and
who probably dislike US with equal
ardor, even while they use us for
a convenience?
1t isn't only the vacation Joneses
its ALL the Joneses. It's the
useless, meaningless friends that
we collect down at the office. It's
the silly, trashy, clutter of friends
Win "iOiLI we pay VI AN6S'
drink cocktails. And swap bets.
It's the people who waste our
time, and spoil our aim through
out the year.
Why do we stand for them?
We can keep our office files
clear.
And our pantry shelves clean
And the grasshoppers out or
our gardens
But can we keep, the human
hoppers out Of our lives?
No; we can't.
So prepare for the Joneses.
THEY'RE COMING.
Copyright. 1925, King Features
Syndicate Inov%
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1926-08-26
NEGOTIATIONS
OF A WIFE
BY Helen Rowland

II All That They Say Is True
NVHE only way to acquire a per-
l. fectly devoted husband, these
days-is to borrow, another
woman's.
Why is it, that when a man be-
comes engaged, he always seems
to think that he ought to go
around and apologize to all the
women from whom he has es-
capped?
Girls are no longer thrilled by
a man with "a dark brown past"
or a 1urid reputation as q heart
breaker. Once, Don Juan may
have cut wide swath with the
ladies-but, today, he would be
classed merely as "a fresh cake
eater"
What no man can understand Is
that a woman's intuition Ia a seis-
mograph which registers every
tremor and palpitation Of his
heart, no matter how far away he
may be.
There are forty ways of making
the average husband happy: the
first consists in know when to
pet and coddle him-the other
thirty-nine, in knowing when 20
let him alone.
Half a married mans dreaming
hours are spent In thinking or
how he will "bawl out the boss,
when he gets the mortgage paid
oef-and the other half in think
ing of the wholesome truths he
will tell his wife, when he gets
the nerve.
No girl can ever understand
how man got past the danger
Gus psychological moment In a
love affair, without proposing
marriage-and most men will ad-
NIT that 1t was just sheer good
luck.
When confirmed cigar smoker
begins smoking cigarettes, his
wife can't help wondering what
little huzzy" has been teaching
him those girlish tricks.
If all that we hear of the
younger generation Is true, the
Recording Angel must suffer from
writer's cramp, these days.
Copyright, 1925, King Features
"SYndAcate.k
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1926-08-26
OLD ALPHABETS

earliest neolithic times, which
are SO old that they pertain to
geology more than to history.
Prehistoric Tomb
The objects found at Glozel
were associated with prehis-
toric tomb. One of the most as
tonishing conclusions that has
been drawn by DIR. Morlet is that
"the alphabet OF the earliest ne
olithic people constituted a COM
mon fund from which the peoples
Of the same stock afterward con-
tinued to draw according to their
proper genius. How otherwise
explain the presence in other ar
chaic alphabets (Cadmean- Greek,
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1926-08-26

touching the sands. After these
devotions, the caravans spring to
life. The camels and horses arc
loaded down with provisions TO
guard against hunger and thirst
through the long. perilous jour-
ney before them.
The trip is really a terrible or
deal-through a scorching desert.
under a soaring sun. Clouds OF
fine dust penetrate even watcn
cases and fill the eyes and ears.
1t is indeed the true and loyal
Believer who will undertake such
a perilous journey; for, yearly,
at least one caravan Is buried
beneath the swirling sands OF the
desert, and he is worthy of much
honor who will risk his life for
his religion.
At sunset. the caravan comes
to a rest, and after camp has
been pitched, the Believers gath
err around their leader. With
their arms crossed and eyes
turned toward Mecca. they pray
to the sonorous chant Of the Nor
abita, 'Lah.llah-ll-Lah.Lah!'
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1926-08-26

DILIGENTLY I referred to the
II discovery at Glozel. near
Vichy in France, OF a prehistoric
alphabet. antedating probably by
many thousand years the alphabet
supposed to have been invented
by the Phoenicians and trans
mitted through the Greeks and
Romans to modern times.
This remarkable discovery has
been diligently followed up by
DIR. A. Morlet and others. 1t
opens a new and surprising
glimpse into the mental life OF
some of the human stock that
lived in Western Europe in those
remote ages when reindeer NAM
moths, cave bears and tigers in.
habited that part Of the world
and were hunted by man. The
invention of linear alphabet
seemed one of the greatest in
tellectual triumphs of our early
ancestors, even when the limits
of human history were supposed
to be fixed by the 5000 years
of Mosaic chronology. Now that
invention is thrust back to the
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1926-08-26

mer running they've done 1t.
Take it from me, I'm getting sick
OF providing the Joneses with
free vacations!'
Look here, Ma. I bet you
asked them. And you know per-
fectly we'll"
II didn't either ask them They
don't need asking. They're
They're like the itch or the
seventeen year locusts, that's
what they are. They come with
out asking. Nobody"
well, if they're coming, I'm
getting out-that's a cinch--"
1T does seem as If we might
have just one summer free from
Joneses. 1t isn't that l mind the
work."
Jaw, now, nothing like that.
It's such cute little picnic to
cook and clean for three big.
husky people and a kid and keep
'em amused"
And give up all the best rooms
And let that hunka cheese use
my 'lectric railroad"
FOR q week anyway"
week? Get off your foot!
You'll be lucky If you get rid Of
'em inside a month"
And how about our own vaca-
ton? Where do we get off? l
amt been able to go off on a
fishing trip for three years be.
cause the Joneses are coming"
"And I'd just DIE IL most OF
my friends had to meet them. l
Just have to crawl in a hole all
the time they're here"
y
Recognize 1t. don't you, Pal?
How often have YOU Joined IN
just such q chorus?
Wa IL Last month, or last Maak
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1926-08-26

Etruscan, EoIo.D Dorian, etc., Of
characters which are not Semitic,
as the Phoenician hypothesis
would require, but which we find
on these tablets Of slater"
DIR. Morlet believes that 1.-The
Phoenicians borrowed the form
of their letters from the neolithic
tribes of the west" de. Western
Europe). The significance Of
this statement is shown by
comparative table Of Glozelian,
Hieratic and Phoenician charac.
tiers.
Had Stone Implements
The Glozelians had the stone
implements characteristic of ne
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1926-08-26

ct HAD a let
L ter from
Hester J on e 8
today" began
Ma at the sup
per table.
There was a
roar from Pa, a
groan from sew
enteen-year = old
A m y, a dis
gusted, food y
gurgle from Bill;
a quivering, mar
tyred sigh from
Aunt Ellie and
t h e n t h e
chorus
For the luVVa
Mike, do you
mean to tell me
that gangs CO.
ing to land on
US again this
year? If"
"Migosh! This
IL the third SuDn-
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1926-08-26
LISTEN, WORLD!

that the JoneseS
descended on
YOU?
Or will It be
next m o n t h,
w h e n they'll
want to sublet
their house and
get a little coun-
try air Tor city
bright lights on
the side-gratis?
Whenever it
was, you know
'em. There's q
Summer Visitor
in every happy
h m e. A n d
what do we do
about it?
What do we
do when these
totally uncon-
genial, unwel-
come outlanders
arrive bag and
hagpa ge and pro-
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1926-08-26

II All That They Say Is True
NNHE only way to acquire a per-
l. fectly devoted husband, the Sc
days-is to borrow another
Woman's.
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1926-01-07
POLICEMAN SHOOTS
BANDIT At DALLAS

DALLAS, Jan. 7.-P1-Two ne
groes. one an alleged robber and the
other a grocery store employe, were
wounded when Dallas police and citi-
zens declined to stand by while burg
lars and highwaymen were rampant
throughout the city last night.
An 1S-year-old negro caught robbing
n pharmacy was shot through the hip
by one officer, as the negro crouchej
behind n counter with a pistol in his
hand apparently waiting to fire on
another who was advancing upon him
in another direction.
A negro delivery boy for a grocery
man was seriously wounded by high
wayman who fired at him as the boy
entered the store, interrupting n hold
up Of the proprietor.
4 few minutes later n lone robber
armed with n pistol, entered the ExaI
Pharmacy and encountered DIR. Mar
vim Moss. who was alone behind q
counter. DR.. Moss attacked the burg
lar. wrested his pistol from him and
fired five shots at the man as he fled.
Sam Wilson, night manager of a
filling station, was held up by two
men who rifled the cash register of
$40 and escaped.
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1926-01-07
COLD MAKES SEED
CORN WORTHLESS

WASHINGTON, d. c., Jan. T.
Although a widespread shortage is I'M
likely, many individual farmers and
even some entire communities will find
their seed corn worthless next spring,
the Department of Agriculture de-
clares.
Tests already made Of many lots Of
seed in the corn belt indicate that its
terminating power was injured by the
low temperatures in October before
corn had dried out thoroughly.
The safe thing to do, says the de-
partment is to find out now whether
or not the seed will grow and, il not,
get some that will while there is plenty
OF time before planting.
Corn cut and shocked before freez-
ing occurred offers a possible source
of seed corn" it was stated. EARS
toward the center Of the shock were
protected more or less from the low
temperatures. This may have enabled
The seed ON these ears to escape freez-
ing injury in some eases. A germina-
ton test OF ears selected from a few
shocks will show whether or not such
seed will grow"
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1926-01-07
SARGENT ONCE ASKED
TO HEAD ACADEMY

LONDON, Jan. 7-GN-Thc state
ment made in New York by Frank
o. Salisbury, the English painter,
that John Singer Sargent refused to
accept the presidency of the Royal
Academy. was confirmed today by
Mr.. Lamb, secretary of the academy.
Mr.. Lamb said that although it was
the custom not to appoint foreign
born artists to the presidency of the
academy, when the late Sir Edward
j. Poynter resigned it was decided
TO offer the post TO Sargent in view
of his pre-eminence in art. Knowing
Sargcnts extreme modesty and retir-
ing ways, those who desired 10 pro-
pose him had little hope that he would
accept.
When the proposal was made said
Mr.. Lamb, Sargent knocked over two
chairs in his agitation and declared
1 would do anything for the academy
except that. Rather than do that ]
would flee the country"
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1926-01-07
NEGRO COLLECTS BILL
BUT GOES TO PRISON

FORT WORTH, Jan. 7.-R)-
Willie Watkins. negro. proved a good
civil but poor criminal lawyer in
district court here when he collected
SO debt from ii Chinese witness
for the defense, but drew four.year
term in the penitcntiary for robbing
the home of deputy sheriff.
The Chinese, restaurant owner.
for whom Willie washed dishes, fail
ed to build up an alih' for the negro
on the witness stand. But after the
jury had retired. Willie asked pcrmis-
sion TO ask the witness one more
question. The court consented.
Has yo' got that money yo' owes
me-" Willie propounded. The celestial
handed it over.
Then the jury came in with four
year term for Willie.
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1926-01-07
WILL KEEPS HEIRS
IN UNITED STATES

PHILADELPHIA, Jan. 7.-P)--
\ provision in the will of the late
DR.. Isaac Minis Hays, Philadelphia
physician, who for many years was
secretary of the American Philoso'
phical Society. stipulated that his
children and heirs shall continue "a
be thorough Americans. and preferably
residents Of Philadelphia. Dr. Hays
died June !. last.
The amount of the estate left was
not revealed, but the executors were
bonded for 100000.
The will stipulatcs that il any oi
his three daughters remains abroad for
Il period exceeding seven months, she
shall lose her share OF the income from
the estate. Also. ii the heirs 90
abroad for seven months or less. they
must remain in the United States for
the following seventeen months.
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1926-01-07
be shaPely!

SGT DO NOT want to be thin! just
i want to be my right weight!
I want these hollows filled out.
just want enough firm. plump flesh
on my bones to fill out my figure"
OF course you do. You want a
figure that you can drape your
clothes on-not just hang them on!
What's the use Of having pretty
clothes, If they just hang on you?
And what would you say IL you
we're told you could have the figure
you want? A graceful, we'll rounded
body-flrm, solid fesh-just enough
just your right weight? You'd be
mighty happy, wouldn't you?
Well, then, be happy because
you can have it! Put plenty Of red
cells In your blood and watch your
weight go up to where you want it!
That's what's the matter with you!
Your blood is impoverished. You
need more rich, red blood. S. S. S.
is the thing to put red blood in your
system. s. S. S. helps Nature build
red-blood-cells by the millions.
You Just try S. S. s. and watch
how quickly you begin to fill out
your clothes. Notice your skin
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1926-01-07
She Could Never
Have Done 1t
With ---

Pikh Bless the American girl who has
piori6ed sportsl She makes pretty pc
ture in the water, and is plucky SWIM
mer, too. Piles are unthinkable for active
women. If you have them, you ought to
know this simple thing to do!
At any hour or moment that you have tho
least distress or discomfort from piles, use A
simple Pyramid pile suppository-and go hap
bleeding and badly protrudlng piles respond at
once TO the soothing suppository applied in per-
feet privacy. But bear the name in mind; Pyra-
mid Is the one every druggist has, usually the
only one he will sell his patrons. Pyramid Is
marvellous. Why suffer another single half-hour
with painful piles?
Sixty cents the box, the world around. But
for proof, free box plainly tVrdbped will be sent
those who write Pyramid Drug Co., 200 Pyra-
mid Bldg, Marshall, Mich.
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1926-01-07
ELLIN MACKAY'S MARRIAGE
COSTS HER $4,000, 900

her husbands name. Clarence H..
Mackay even went so far as to notify
all stores TO cancel her charge ac-
counts when she became enamoured
with "lrv," it was also learned to-
day.
Since the elopement he has not
communicated with her. and his
friends say he is trying now 10 build
a wall in his heart which will even
shut out the memory of her.
Berlin and his bride slipped into
New York City last night on n ferry
while hundreds jammed the Pcnnsyl-
vania station, waiting for n glimpse
of the honeymoon couple. They had
quietely stepped off Pennsylvania
express at Newark.
WILL ASK BLESSING.
"Iappy? OF course / am, but
there's heavy load on my heart be-
cause my father has not wired his
approval and blessing. That would
complete my happiness"
Are you going to have a religious
ceremony" she was asked.
"Please--it's too soon TO ask about
that"
Elm will meet her father face to
face today whyn she and Irving at
tad the marriage of Consuelo Van
derbilt and Earl f. Il. Smith on Fifth
avenue.
The two of them have returned
especially for that event, and for the
pportunity of asking the fathers for
giveness for their Dusty elopement.
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1926-01-07
WILLIAM AND MARY
TABOOS CHARLESTON

WILLIAMSBURG, Va. Jan. T.
R)-The Charleston. the latest step
to invade the dance hall, was banned
today at the College Of William and
Mary.
Dance, after all it was held.
SHOULD emphasize grace and beauty
and as the latest fad preserves neither
of these qualities. it should hold no
place on the program Of college
dances.s
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1926-01-07
CALIFORNIA HAY CROP
( WORTH $75,796,OOO

SACRAMENTO, Jan. 7.-R)-
Despite what real estate men may
say, the principal crop of 1925 in
California, long famous for its oranges,
grapes, prunes and other palatable
foods, was hay. The total value of
the 1925 tame hay crop was estimat-
ed yesterday by the state and federal
departments of agriculture to be
worth $75,796,O00 while the proud
orange and grape families accounted
for only S6S,640.000 and S22,91O, 900,
respectively. The widely known
prune was eighth in importance with
n value of $15, 400,00U.
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1926-01-07
OKLAHOMA SLAYER,
HIS PLEA REFUSED,
TO DIE ON GALLONS

PHOENIX, Jan. 7.-CP)-William
a. Lawrence, Oklahoma outlaw and
slayer, must go to the gallows at dawl
tomorrow for the murder Of a police
man.
His last hope for a Communication
o.. sentence to life Imprisonment van
llshed late yesterday when the state
board Of pardons and paroles de-
clined to intervene in his behalf.
Notified of the action, Lawrence de.
MED he committed the murder of
which he was convicted. Asked wheth-
er he. wanted n clergyman, he assert
ed his executionors will need the
prayers more than ma.
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1926-01-07
TOURISTS TO VISIT
S. A. ON WAY SOUTH

Travelling on a special train over
the MKT. Lines. more than 12i
tourists will arrive in San Antonio
from Dallas at Z: 20 Il. M. January
Il. it was announced Thursday by
Frank Il. Griffia, division passenger
agent.
The cxcursionists are on their way
to Mexico, conducted by Frank Greedy
of Dallas. This is the fifth mid-win-
ter annual tour to Mexico conducted
BIZ Mr.. Greedy.
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1926-01-07

It's red blood that does 1t. And
s. S. s. surely helps Nature build
that red blood S. 8. 8. is sold by all
drug stores. The larger bottle is
more economical.
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1926-01-07

These new prices apply to product that is far
and away the finest Dodge Brothers have
ever produced. They are made possible by a
S1O,00O,OO0 expansion program, which practi-
caly doubles production, and materially reduces
the cost of manufacture.
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1926-01-07

clear of unsightly
blemishes your ap'
petite in CIR ease
strength ME to
fiabby muscles and
vim and vigor MI
your whole system.
It's red blood that
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1926-01-07
WIDOW GETS ESTATE.

The entire estate of more than $4,000
of the late Thomas A. Reed who died
December II, was left TO Mrs. T..
Reed, widow, according TO his will
filed in the county probate court
Thursday.
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1926-01-07
BY Universal Service.

NEW YORK, Jan. TEN million
dollars is the price Ellin Mackay pays
for loving and marrying Irving Ber-
lin, the song-writer who began his
career as a singing waiter in Mig
ger Mike" Salter's saloon.
This was learned today when
friends of her father. Clarence II.
Mackay, said he had disinherited Ellin
of her share in his gigantic estate.
While Ellin and Irving were rush
ing TO New York from Atlantic City,
TO ask his blessings and forgiveness.
the father was journeying to bis Long
Island estate where he entertained the
Prince of Wales.
WRITES NEW WILL.
Once there, he summoned maids and
began hastily packing Films costly
wardrobe. Gowns worth thousands
were tossed into hamper, and when
the last bit of fincry had been gath
cred. he dispatched them TO Mrs.
Irving Berlin, No. 30 West Forty
sixth street"
No reminder of the girl who was
his solace remains save one lovely
picture taken before the Jewish song
ster entered her life.
Friends say that Mackay summon
ed his attorneys the moment he learn
ed of his child's elopement, and die
ia ed a new will which is believed to
be unbreakable. This instrument rec
ognizes Film MS a legal formality,
but virtually cuts her off without a
penny, tits said.
But this isn't all: if Film wishes
to charge hats and dresses and shoes,
she must open new accounts under
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1926-06-11
PAINS MOST
ExCRUCIATING
Ohio Lady "Felt Tired About
All the Time Tells How
She Got Much Better
After Taking Cardui.

when just a girl I was one of the
sallow, pale, weak looking kind, says
Mrs. Curtis Sword Of Portsmouth,
Ohio. II felt tired about all the time
and would have the most excru-
ciating pains in my sides and back.
Some one told my mother Of Cardui
She got it for me and, after I had
taken two or three bottles l was much
better. was gaining in flesh and felt
well like other girls"
Then, on a later occasion, Mrs. Sword
says she found herself in a very run
down ondition--"nervous, lust felt
lfeless and tired" she explains. "I
wasn't strong and didn't eat enough to
give me strength. When night came, 1
rolled and tumbled.
81 sent for Cardui and took three or
four bottles, using the same treatment
/ had before, and I could see a change
very soon. Cardui seemed to fit nv
case for it surely did me a lot of good
F'About year ago / was very
Ill and did not get better for a long
time. Then I just kept in bed. too weak
to get up. I used Cardui and after
taking it couple of weeks, I was able
to get up. l regained my strength and
am feeling fine. / took twelve bottles
in all. have good color, good weight
and am all right"
Sold by good druggists everywhere.