davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Intermountain Jewish news., 1926-08-19
TESTING YOU

The most prominent advertisement
tan offerings exclusively in this with the object of test
ing out Jewish buying and the loyalty of the
Jewish News Take the paper with you when you go down
'look em over
Other department stores will do likewise week. The
nermountan Jewish News be made val
liable if you will do Rosh Hashana buying the
-sds this paper.
The Pleasantville press. (Pleasantville, N.J.) 1912-1929, 1926-12-28

Prof: This machine can take
the place of forty girls.
Bored Student: Yeh, but whA
wants date with a machineP
-PeHnsylgania Punch Boxa 4
The Pleasantville press. (Pleasantville, N.J.) 1912-1929, 1926-12-28
HEARD At TIE TWO A Day

Mile. Fiji Mako curtain
speech with soft voice, soft lights
and a handkerchief):
FriendS-you are my friends,
aren't you'll don't know how |
am going to express my gratitude
tor the perfectly ripping way you
have received me. | don't like to
think OF you out there as an au-
dience. You are not a mere audi
ence. You are my friends and |
am your friend, and we have come
TO know each other through the
medium of the theater. During my
tour / always look forward to the
time when l can be with my
friends out here in Mass-er-
California. l have always counted
Ohi-that is, California as my very
own state, for (proudly) I am
Connection rather a California
product, along with your goonderJM
old New England beans. And now
my time is up-and | must go to
where | know not. Always,
though, L will carry in my heart
of hearts warm place for my
dear friends here, and will look
forward with the greatest joy to
the time when | will return to my
beloved New Hampshire.
The Pleasantville press. (Pleasantville, N.J.) 1912-1929, 1926-12-28

(Ofistage) Hey, Mack, give me
a cigarette, for Mixes sake-Im
al halIed up.
California Pelican.
The Pleasantville press. (Pleasantville, N.J.) 1912-1929, 1926-12-28

The tramp paused outside the
house.
Clear out" shouted the lady of
the house. Il amt got no wood
to chop. There amt nothin' you
could do around here"
"But, madam, there is" retorted
the wayfarer with dignity. Il could
give you a few lessons in gram
mar" j:s.sss
a - .lstfsssS --Blacb cr B1He Jaw.
The Pleasantville press. (Pleasantville, N.J.) 1912-1929, 1926-12-28

v So bored that he looked as if he
had bought the world for a nickel,
and wanted his money back.
WISCONSIN Octopus.
l.
81
d Gerald: Last night Walter had
a date for a show and when he got
there he found he had the wrong
girl.
. Geraldine: Doesn't he do tie
cleverest t!Ainss!
Red CT.
The Pleasantville press. (Pleasantville, N.J.) 1912-1929, 1926-12-28

, Were intellectual opposites." !
"Be explicit"
I'm Intellectual and you're t2s
opposite"
-HeSt Point Pointer.
The Pleasantville press. (Pleasantville, N.J.) 1912-1929, 1926-12-28

Nothing is more moving than the
spectacle OF bearded lady dying
and leaving wife and five cAil
dren.
Rutgers ChaHtielesG u
The Pleasantville press. (Pleasantville, N.J.) 1912-1929, 1926-12-28

A large, dark touring car sped
along a dim, lonely country road.
The forms of the two occupants
were barely visible in the gather
ing dusk. They were not notice
ably talkative.
Finally, "Now be careful, Bob"
This in high-pitehed female voice.
A moments silence.
Again, Bob! Stop"
No reply.
And then, "Now, Bob, you're go
ing too far tonight. "
A pause.
Bob, if you don't stop this in
slant. I'll"
And Bob turned sadly and re-
piled, dyes, m'dear. I'll turn back
at the first side road, but you
needn't worry about our getting
lost. l know this road perfectly"
Yes, they were married.
Why
-Notre Dame Juggler.
! SO you were in Paris, eh? How
did you like the Eiffel Tower?"
Gosh my eyes never rose more
than two feet from the ground"
+ " Y. Medicy.
A man, while eXcaVating in Arr
IONA, found two skulls each an inch
thick. He sent them to the uni
Ncrsity and they were entered, with
full standing.
california Pelican.
There are two very mistaken
ideas prevalent about our colleges.
One of them is that young men
come to college to study, and the
other is that they don't. a
-Chieag0 FhoeHir. I
Jane: But I can be 4 sister 10
you.
Jack: Got six already; couldn't
YOU make it cousin2
Wisconsin OctoPm.
~
Did you hear that the mermaid
fell asleep in her tank while the
water was running
Good heavens, did she drown?'
ooh, no; fortunately Sd. had her
mouth open "
---Northwesteyr PWbie Parrot.
The Pleasantville press. (Pleasantville, N.J.) 1912-1929, 1926-12-28
THAT mining stock you ad !,
vised me to buy dropped telI
points"
Eyes, I was afraid it would,
that's why I didn't buy any"
California Pelicdx. i
USELESS IMPROVEMENT

l.
Prof: This machine can take
the place of forty girls.
Bored Student: Yeh, but whA
wants date with a machine?
- -PeHnsylVania Punch Boaa y
9.
> Were intellectual opposites." y
/ "Be explicit" {,
I'm intellectual and you're t2s
opposite"
--WeSt Point Pointer.
y
Nothing is more moving than the
spectacle OF bearded lady dying
and leaving a wife and five cAil
dren.
--RMgers Chautielex II
&C \
Willy: What's on your mindf i
lilly: Thoughts. :,
Willy: Treat them kindly, ttU
are in strange place.
--CeHtre Colonel.
Rejected Suitor (despondentIy):
Yes, she gave me the air and SINCE
then I've been going straight 90
HE'LL
Kind Friend: Tough, old man!
| wish that ] might help you.
SLACK 6. Blue Jay.
Miss Lorna Ounce says that
some dates remind her of sl0s
motion picture Of a sloth.
Kansas Sour 0ri.
"That man goes to church every
, Sunday"
y That's his business"
>Ncver knew he was niniNN.'
Stevens StoSs NV,
The Pleasantville press. (Pleasantville, N.J.) 1912-1929, 1926-12-28

r'''' u 90 s.
Tourist: Well stop here for the
night. It's the last resort.
-. - --BiHe Or.
~ .s{ 81
"What striking characteristics
that man has"
yes. He happens to be Gene
Tunney."
u. -NOrt6cppSfpyt p1Yble p1yf0f .
The Pleasantville press. (Pleasantville, N.J.) 1912-1929, 1926-12-28

r.
mowers that Tn ~ v un s IN ~ sv' b .
tsn;osta ~ 'N' - ''y ''s'
/, Msr;a. Va. WOW, hut '- -ss1'l,t \
\ Hostess: 5, Bit 1 ~ha?s ''',
Na'm. g
-NortA,yeste,n PURPLE Parrot. \
I
| " 8 49, &C III IL "a &
.,,,, -, :, Y
h. ssnm9a =
you IT, ,ooh H., - " .,rk u lha n,ho.
:, Gub ''' ''"' 3" "''""'
M yby,J Ietter ,to,, ~ The ,no,e, ),
~ ' 'uy " :" y ' us '0Js"
| &C !,
|
. "a. was i gooa gplief on lheiI
ilps'o''e 'hah nc WAS soou
s'''Ae"'
t.
The Pleasantville press. (Pleasantville, N.J.) 1912-1929, 1926-12-28
FEELING VERY LOW


FEELING VERY LOW
oe0oe''' NO. C WEI, my p a1fe,
'''' - - '''''
-
oWajter 7 smell fresh naint .
Inst a moment more sir The
- /" ~ '',Y' 81. az
The Pleasantville press. (Pleasantville, N.J.) 1912-1929, 1926-12-28

y ''There's my old man with
another loaf of bread, and I'll
bet there isn't a pint of whisky
N the house" ~
st w = -. r.. Catalonia Pelican. \
- ~ WI
The Pleasantville press. (Pleasantville, N.J.) 1912-1929, 1926-12-28

Hello! Hello! Oh, operator,
you've given me the wrong number
Hello, 252? Hello, is this 252?
Oh, heck! 1 beg your pardon, OPP
orator, | gave you the number
backward; it's 252l"
Kansas .SoW Oiqi.
Putnam patriot., 1926-12-03

ed over his duties, for the time being. Co Frank Merritt secretary to Repre- sentative Hersey of Maine.
 As to Fem of Hartford and Glynn of Ninsted. their offices are locked and have been all summer. No one knows just when they or their seere- taries plan to return.
 Speculate on Mclean
 Political Washington has been spec ulatIng lately as to whether Senator Mclean will run for reelection m 1928. The question has come up be- cause t is understood that in 1922 the senior Connecticut senator was not especially anxious Co make the run. His own health and that if his wife. together with his desire to enjoy q more quiet life in his sunset years, contributed to this disinclination.
 Recently. however. usually relia- bie news source declared confidently to this correspondent that. were this l92e, Mir. Mclean would be a candi- date to succeed himself The assamp- tlon was based on the belief that the Senator health Is pretty good. now. and that he finds plenty ta do and hold nis interest in the senate. especially iH connection with his work as chairman oi the important banking and currency committee
 The senator himself k halale likely Ia make aa announcement .=H. indeed. he makes up his mind. before the i92s nominating tune ls good deal closer at hand Some who heard hls keynote speech at the Hartford Re publican convention m September thought they could interpret t as an accounting for his stewardship during his years in the Senate with an un- dercurreut of hope that his record has been satisfactory. But this required considerable reading between the lines Of what he actually sad at that time.
 The impression here is that fl Me Lean wants SIX more years in the Sen ate he can have them His work here never has identified him as a narrow partisan, but rather as one whose mental horizon ls good deal broader than the average senator's. He has, therefore. not few friends on the Democratic side of the party fence. His written word is more eloquent than that of any other senator, which Is | broad statement, but true in the judgment of good observers.
 Connecticut. incidentally. has not recently been noted as state where senators are reluctant about giving up their jobs Mclean Is one case in point. Another is the late Senator Brandeget. who, before his suicide, had told friend that he had decided not tu run for fhe office again
Putnam patriot., 1926-12-03
t. 5. DIVERTED
But People Are Nevertheless Under
 nourished, Says Dieticisn

Wrong eating. rather than promis- cuous drinking, k what k the matter with America today. in the opinion of Mrs Delle Ross. famous Bloomington, H.. dietician Mrs, Ross is a former singer and teacher, who, having cured herself of the disease of overweight aft years of struggle is meeting ex- traordinary success 10 curing over weight tn others
 Eating. and not drinking. Is the curse of America today says Mrs. Ross. "We are overfed but under nourished. Not all are incorporate in drinking, but most of us do not know how to eat intelligently. All foods are good if eaten correctly. Seven years of close study has convinced me that every disease known to man Is first caused by wrong eating. Lack of adequate food. supplied in proper variety, leads to overwrought nerves, and the victim seeks In drink and drugs what he should have found in right foods
 Many people believe it silly to think that perfect health and bodily struc- ture can be brought about by merely eating certain foods. But is itY You would not try to repair n wire fence With silk thread nor mend a silk stock ing with wire. would you7 Each thing Is good in it's place. and the same Is true of foods The human body is n complex machine depending for it's life-building and lfc-sustaining pow CTS, science tells us, upon many ele- ments found in foods free from the improvements of man. fl these are not all supplied properly, the body cannot work at the highest efficiency. Brain, muscle. bone and nerves depend npaa the b!ooa t0 furnish them mater ials, the blood, in turn, is dependent on the food put into the stomach. To have q perfect body. We need only to give 1t right foods, judieiously com bined. Disease germs do net thrive j.: a pure blood stream"
Putnam patriot., 1926-12-03
Pineapple Club Sandwich

Spread three slices of toAat with Fry slice of ham quickly, then a slice of pineapple. keeping all hot while assembling. Build up sandwich as followa: Slice of toast, fried ham. crisp lettuce leaf, slice of toast. slice of chicken, another crisp lettuce leaf. slice of frisd and last, slice of toast.
Putnam patriot., 1926-12-03

to be sure that the acid and fruity flavor k unimpaired. All measure ments should be level
Putnam patriot., 1926-12-03

Washington. D. C. Dee. lone of the first bills that has been turned out by the Government printing office since the adjournment of Congress last July is a measure just prepared by Senator Bingham. providing a per maneut government for the Virgin Is lands
 The Senator made a first-hand in- vestlgation of conditions in this strat- eglcally important American posses sion. early in the summer. and the present bill Is the result. He will in- troduce 1t the day Congress convenes.
 Until the present. the Virgin Islands have been governed under slight modification of the old Danish Colon ial law. Their residents.-eXcept the few that have sworn allegiance to Denmark.-have no rights as citizens. The Bingham bill provides that they be recognized as full citizens of the United States It is voluminous document and when passed will take its place as a virtual constitution for the islands
 Senator Bingham. who has been in Washington once or twice since Con gress adjourned. came here Co stay Tuesday. He has taken an apartment on Sixteenth street. where he will live with his family from now on. instead Of at the hotel where they had made their home.
 The junior senator was the first of the Nutmeg state delegation tu reach Washington. ready for the short ses. sion. His colleague, Senator Mclean. was expected Thursday by his secre- tary, William Sault, who opened the office several weeks ago.
 Offices Deserted
 Over in the House, the offices of the Connecticut delegation are, for the most part, deserted. That of Repre- sentative Tils0n, the Republican floor leader. has been open all summer, but it's only tenants are Colonel Tilson s assistants, Joseph k. McCuen. his leg islatiFe clerk and right-hand man. and Miss Daily. one of his secretaries. McGugH has only been in town eou- pie Of weeks. for he was in New York this summer assisting his chief, who was in charge of the Eastern Speak eFs' Bureau vf the Republican Nation al Committee Colonel Tilson has not been here since the election. He has been resting. after a very strenuous -ummers work. but was expected here soon after Thanksgiving.
 None of the other Connecticut mem brrs have been here since July. and no one knows when they are returning I secretary works in the quarters of Congressman Freeman, of New Lon don. but Freeman himself was not looked for before Congress eonvenes.
 4 namesake of Congressman Mer- ritt of Stamford. tbut no relationl Is temporarily looking after his office. The Congressman has not been here since July. but Carl Osborne. his see retary. kept the office open all sum mer Now Osborne has gone Co Flor ida for a short vacation and has turn
Putnam patriot., 1926-12-03
AUTO WITH SKIS

The novel combination of covered wagon and 6 Chevrolet roadster mounted in front on skis and in the rear on snowbile caterpillar tractors, Is the strange appearing vehicle used by the Black River Telephone Com pany of LowvilIe. \. r. for winter Trouble shooting on it's lines in the heavy snow belt of New York state.
 The difficult winter territory for the company's linemen extends from Lake Ontario to Raquette Lake in the Adirondack Mountains and involves the maintenance of service through out a chain of twenty exchanges.
 This type of vehicle. which will travel over the most formidable snow drifts. was assembled by II q peehl- es a mechanic in the employ of the telephone company.
Putnam patriot., 1926-12-03

Tn 1925 Chevrolet astonished the automotive world by attaining an an- nual production never before reached byany manufacturer of gearshift auto mobiles.
 Yet, so spectacular has been the in- crease in demand for Chevrolet cars, that a new and even more brilliant record is the climax for 1926. Thus, for ttoo years in succession, Chevrolet has broken all it's previous records and has set netV mark in a,ito- motiue history.
 Small dovp pusrnsnt and eonoeniens terms.
 Touring or Roadster ssfo. Coupe Goa
 Ir..ek l1S lChassis OnIs. II on TrNck .
Putnam patriot., 1926-12-03
TO PRESERVE WILD LIFE
Sportamen. Farmers, Trsppers and Others Interested Asked 10 Attend

Last Febrary, there was held at the Capitol a conference for the dis eussion of various policies and prob lems of wild life conservation in Con necticut with a view to cooperative action. Many resolutions were passed concerning the subjects discussed. In anticipation of the approaching legis- lative session. it seems expedient to in- vite all interested to a similar confer enee with the Commission at the House of Representative Hall, State Capitol, Hartford. Friday, December 10, begin ming at 10 o'clock a. m There will probably he an afternoon session.
 Among the new subjects about which inquiries have been made are the following:
 Advisability of reducing the bag limit upon any of the game birds or quadrupeds In this connection, the grouse situation will be discussed and the adviaablity of making a close sea son of one or two years considered.
 The question of permitting hen pheasauts to be killed has been raised by some
 An important question submitted to the Commission Is as to more freedom in the matter of killing pheasants on private preserves operated by clubs on which the pheasants have been propa- gated and reared at the expense of the clubs. The Glove Valley Club in the state of New York has been mentioned as an example. Rest days. other than Sundays. during the open season for game. Regulating the shipment by mail or otherwise of poisons such as poison capsules used in killing foxes and other fur bearing animals. Prohi- bition of the sale of striped bass less than twelve inches in length. Close season and size limit on calico bass.
 Subjects which were discussed last February may be brought before the conference for further consideration if requested. The Commission would appreciate a representative gathering, including trappers and landowners. at this conference.
Putnam patriot., 1926-12-03
HOUSEHOLD NOTES
Hawaiian Pineapple Punch

A delightful fruit punch that wifi serve twenty-five persons may be made as follows.
 Add two cupsfull Rranulated sugar to three cupsfull of boiling water. stir until dissolved, boil five minutes and cool Put two tablespoons black tea into pitcher and pour a quart of boiling water over <. cover and let stand fifteen minutes. Strain this into the cooled syrup. Now add a can of crushed Hawaiian pineapple; 1; also the juice of six lemons and five oranges. one pine fruit juice and n quart of any berries which are suit able with the pineapple, such as straw berries, raspberries or cherries, either canned or fresh. Into the bottom of the punch bowl. put one-half pint crushed mint leaves. block of ice. and the cold fruits and juices, and plain or bottle spring water. Add the water only little at time. and test,
Putnam patriot., 1926-12-03

open square Nice is very gay and cosmopolitan with lots of tourists. but, also. full of French citizens. The drives along the coast are too lovely for words. The shore curves in and out with bays and eoves, where the blue sea breaks over the rocks, and the vines and flowers grow right down to the water.
 "The foreign life is delightful. ani we enjoy if thoroughly. though every where we find that our foreign policy at home has brought about an un- happy state of affairs. There Is much bitterness of feeling and Il is very sad.
Putnam patriot., 1926-12-03
SCHOOL TEACHING ON
 A MOVING TRAIN

Schools en wheels are utilized in sparseiy settled sections along the rail way lines of northern Ontario to en- able the department of education to comply with the compulsory school law Of the Province Two ears have bee, fitted as schoolrooms and will be at. tached to regular trains. School ehil. dren will be taken on at different stop. and brought back on the return trip. instruction being adapted to the train schedule.
Putnam patriot., 1926-12-03
STREET CARS EMPLOY 500. 900

Electric railways of the United States employ on their street cars and busses approximately 300. 900 persons. About 5O0.000 are employed in manu- featuring electric railway supplies.
Putnam patriot., 1926-12-03

A Michigan man who owned a pet porcupine offered fl as a gift to any one who would take 1t away, after 1t had become too friendly with strang- CTS. rubbing it's quills into their legs.
Putnam patriot., 1926-12-03
BINGHAM HAS BILL

Permanent Government For Virgin Island Aim of Con nectieut Senator.-ofices of Congressmen Deserted- Speculation on Mclean In 1e2s-Believed He Can Have Another Six Years If Desired
 
 BULKLEY SOUTHWORTH GRIFFIN Special Correspondence Q The Patriot)
Putnam patriot., 1926-12-03

4 rare white elephant has been loaned to Regents Park Zoo. London. upon condition that no one be permit- ted to ride upon 1t.
Putnam patriot., 1926-12-03

A Frenehman in 1736 began the first scientific study of rubber.
The Washington times., 1926-03-23
POACHERSFINE
FOR TRAPPING
BY international News Service


GREENWICH. Conn.,, March %.
Woodlands of milliohaires' estates
here were attractive to the eyes
Of Hiram and Obadiah Lcuden, local
residents, and they placed traps in
the woods to ensnare fur-bearing
animals, expecting thereby to make
money.
one of the traps captured val
liable German police dog and held
1t prisoner for two weeks while the
dogs master was offering reward.
while q veterinarian was nursing
the dog back to life, game wardens
secuted and came upon a dozen
traps scattered through the estates
of Percy Al. Rockefeller, joan
French. and William G.. RockeTel-
Ter. and a little detective work by
the wariens put the Loudens under
arrest.
what profits the Loudens may
have made by trapping were re
duced when they were fined for
falling 10 obey the law requiring
that traps in Connecticut bear the
owners names and addresses and
for failing to visit traps within
forty-eights hours after the traps
were set.
The millionaires' woodlands are
expected to be free from traps for
the present at least.
The Washington times., 1926-03-23
]. 5. U|VHURT BY
JAP TARIFF

Except In minor cases the neW
japanese tariff. providing for higher
rates on number OF import com
mOdities, will not greatly affect the
trade from the United States, accord
ing to II. R. Eldridge,. chief OF the Far
Eastern Division Of the Department
OF Commerce..
Importers in Japan agree that q
definite settlement Of the tariff Ques-
ton. which is expected to come. into
effect by April /, will bring about a
considerable Improvement in general
trade conditions. removing the lIncer-
tainty which has existed for several
months
.The outstanding development in
Japan recently was the Introduction
OF the new customs tariff bin and
the marked advance in japanese ex-
change, Eldridge said
For time 1t seemed that the
inability .of political groups to agree
on the Governments tax law might
result In the dissolution Of the Diet.
thereby postponing consideration Of
the tariff bill.
The two leading parties. however,
have effected compromise and com
sequentIy the tariff bill probably will
pass at this session"
Sales of imported goods in Japan
have been fairly heavy In the early
months of 1926, especially in pro.
ducts on which deliveries could be
made before the anticipated effective
date of the new tariff Well stocked
lines, officials said. may suffer some
what from the sharp rise in ex.
change.
The Washington times., 1926-03-23
SURVEY
IS ORDERED

SACRAMENTO. Calf, March %.
A character survey, embracing
study OF modern youth in California
schools, has been ordered by VIII
G. Wood, State superintendent or
Public instruction. in letter to-
California high school principals.
a great deal has been written
and said In recent years concern.
ing the shortcomings or youth,
Wood said in his letter, ordering
the unique investigation.
Undoubtedly during the war we
famed the flames Of idealisTl1 TO the
limit and there was q natural re-.
action. For some years after the
war there was spirit Of cynicisn
which affected not only adults but
youths as well. There was also q
general tendency toward materialism
with consequent breakdown OF re-
straint and moral standards in most
all ages and walks OF life.
The State educator then states
that he feels there Is hope that
the younger generation Is recover
ing for civilization some OF, the
splendid treasures lost during the
war He concludes with the re
quest that each school principal
outline his observations with re.
spect to the character Of the chill
dren under his supervision.