Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1926-12-19

saddle on hind end foremost, ana as
he did so one of the boys guyed him
by saying. Say, Cage. you have got
your saddle on, wrong end to. To
this Cage. in his indignant but happy
frame Of mind. replied. How do you
know which way I'm going?
Representative Charles l.. Underhill
NJ Masss chusetts, who Is fathering the
bill authorizing an appropriation OF
$25 900 900 to acquire all privately
owned land in the triangle south OF
Pennsylvania avenue, IL quoted as
authority for another true story on
President Coolidge:
In an attempt to reckls "Cal" bit.
an airy member of the Massachusetts
LEGISLATURE once said to him. then a
new member, Say, Cal, Ia 1t gram
NAUTICAL to say a hen sits or a hen
sets'?' Well" nasaled out the flu
ture President. Its good deal more
i'm portant question, back in the coun-
try where I came from, tn know when
hen cackles whether she's laid or
lied"
Former Senator William M. Butler
of Massachusetts likes to tell this one;
A very intelligent and positive old
gentleman from the country was ne
ing kept on his nerves when visiting
in Boston for the first time by the
reckless way his taxi driver was shoot
ing through the traffic. The day was
cloudy and threatening. He noticed
the driver kept letting go OF his steer
ing wheel and sticking his hand out
through the window into the air
This made the old man still more
t. 1,.ut 4 I,
and he finally shouted:
Say, there, driver, don't get keer-
less. You keep both hands on that
wheel Ill tell you when it rains.
n \
bright young Indian on fur
Tough from the World War At MS
tribal home in Oklahoma was asked
by Senator Harreld how he liked the
war. To this rather odd question ne
made reply:
Or. Hubert Work, former Postn1as
| ter General and now Secretary OF the
| Interior, In also quoted by Gen. Bart
| lett for the inimitable way In which
he relates how two Scotchmen were
smoking together when one OF them
remarked:
There's nae pleasure in smoking
the pipe" 49,,
What makes we say 1t. Sandie?'
well, when We be smoking yer owl
tobaccy We are all the time a-thinkine
about the awful cost ana wnen "
he smoking another's tobaccy We nae
ter ram yer pipe sac tight tn nae
draw"
| n n n X
Postmaster General New Ia author
| ity for this. The fraud order power
of the Postmaster General brings &c
record strange money making schemes
One of these developed the following
| A concern In another country ar
vsrtised in the United States newspa
ners to send to any address IL quarts
~ rye for S1s." When the price was
| received there was sent to the thirsty
purchaser 10 quarts of rye. just as
advertised, but 1t was the dry grain
| itself and not the drink, rye WINS
rev" This scheme brought in a large
sum of money before even the prompt
| est action could stop 1t.
y \ y
Attorney General Sargent also has
a little story about his experience
with a, contrary juror Included In the
snice box. A contrary man on jury
is the most exasperating thing imag-
Unable to lawyers. He delights 10
disagree, While United States At.
tornev General Sargent was counsel
IN a certain case in Vermont courts
he was afflicted with such a juror.
when after "a hours OF disagreement
the court said: Mr. Sheriff. you may
order IL dinners for the jury" Jere,
az Sargent was Familiarity called. re-
marked to his honor. Cant you
make it IL dinners and pale OF
hay?"
It is also recalled that Senator Reed
of Missouri, in a Senate investigation
asked a. hostile witness, Are you adj
dicted to drink" The indignant ties.
| tifier replied, That's my business
The sarcastic Senator replied. Yes,
I know that, but Is 1t your only bust
ness?"
Judge Wales Of the United States
Civil Service Commission is put on
record for this one: A Vermonter was
visiting an old friend In Washington
His friend. of course, was inquirins
about old acquaintances hack on the
hillsides of that charming State.
How about 81 Cummings, is he
prosperous?" The visitor perked up
| quickly at that and tarted out, Pros
porous? I'll say he's prosperous. He
keeps two fast horses and. eats butter
on his doughnuts."
| X X
Senator Moses of New Hampshire
has come to dread the telling Of this
| story by Gen. Bartlett: A colored
bootblack came into a small New
Hampshire town, the first of his occu
patton and color to invade Its rustic
simplicity. He was a strange char
acter and was not always called by
the same name. Gen. Bartlett asked,
'Bill, what Is your real name?" The
darby replied: well, some folks call
me Rastus, some Lincoln, and some
folks call me Bill. but my maiden
name was Moses"