davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The midland journal. (Rising Sun, Md.) 1885-1947, 1926-11-05
A Big Drau

Cactus Joe-How do you know you
had Wild Bill's hand beat in that
poker gamer"
Prospect Pete--I seen him draw
three cards. deep breath and re-
volver.
The midland journal. (Rising Sun, Md.) 1885-1947, 1926-11-05
HE REMEMBERED

She deeply nterested)-And, Of
course, your rich uncle remembered
you in making his will?
He-He did that-remembered to
leave me out.
The midland journal. (Rising Sun, Md.) 1885-1947, 1926-11-05
Son,efimes Necessarr

Reid-Do you believe it bad luck
to put up an umbrella in the house?
Lewis-It's going to be bad luck for
my landlord If he doesn't fix our roof
so we won't have to!
The midland journal. (Rising Sun, Md.) 1885-1947, 1926-11-05
Taking No Chances

Harding-Why don't you tell people
hat you are good mechanic?
Murphy-Yes, and have my neigh
oors forever wanting me to come over
and tinker with their car? Well, I
guess not
The midland journal. (Rising Sun, Md.) 1885-1947, 1926-11-05
An Expert

Circus Manager-So you want a Job
as a snake charmer? Much expert
ence along that line?
The Girl-Yes. I've vamped few
lounge lizards.
The midland journal. (Rising Sun, Md.) 1885-1947, 1926-11-05
Formal

II think I heard the BELL" said q
mistress to her new parlor maid.
Eyes, 1t was the bell" replied the
maid
swell, hurry up and and answer 1t.
It's sure to be some friend making
call"
"You go. madam. You know them
90 much better than I do"
The midland journal. (Rising Sun, Md.) 1885-1947, 1926-11-05
Doubted Il

Gray-They say mans first thou
sand dollars is the hardest to get.
Green-I can't agree with that. An
oil stock promoter got mine easily
enough.
The midland journal. (Rising Sun, Md.) 1885-1947, 1926-11-05
History Repeats

MOLLY got a fine lot of wedding
presents, didn't she?"
~Yes, she always does."-Sydney
Bulletin.
The midland journal. (Rising Sun, Md.) 1885-1947, 1926-11-05
Searched With a Light

Said foolish young lady of Wales:
IAN odor of gas now prevails"
Then she searched with q light, and
later that night
Was collected-in seventeen pals.
The midland journal. (Rising Sun, Md.) 1885-1947, 1926-11-05

Some men think they know enough
II they know where they can borrow
money.
The midland journal. (Rising Sun, Md.) 1885-1947, 1926-11-05
A Matter of Size

She-I thought you looked thinner.
He-I am not such a big fool as
used to be.
The midland journal. (Rising Sun, Md.) 1885-1947, 1926-11-05

Justice delayed is justice ended.
The midland journal. (Rising Sun, Md.) 1885-1947, 1926-11-05

A rousing time is likely to occur Just
before breakfast.
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1926-05-29

DIVERSIFIED FOUNTAIN PENS ARE MADE FOR
the purpose OF saving time in the matter Of filing and
are boons to those people who do not want find pen and
INK They are ready on moments notice. The stand
ard makes sell for 81, some for SO and the Pencils sell
tor 81 and SIS, We have made arrangements with one
ct the largest manufacturers in this part of the country
to offer guaranteed PEN a m PENCIL to match as
~~~~.,m :r@$
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1926-05-29

THIS OUTFIT rs GUARAN ICED BY THE MANUFAC-
TURERS TO GIVE PERFECT WRITING SATISFA
In Standard Makes the Outfit sells for ST. you do not
wish to take advantage Of the Subscription Offer send US
So and we will charge 81 Of It on your subscription ac-
count and the other So will complete the payment If
re Combination does not come up to specification return
re same and your money W II he refunded.
Richmond planet. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1883-1938, 1926-05-29

YOU CAN SEND us THREE YEAR, SUBSCRIPTIONS
with your own making So, nd we will send you an Over
size, SETTLING Pen with an Over sized 14-Karat Solid
Gold Point wit Hard Irdiu Tip prepaid, and an Over
sized Pencil tomatch the en-; both packed in beauti-
ful steel box which is covered with Karatol and lined
with hi6h grade plush and attn.
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1926-04-29
HOUSE MEMBERS KEYED UP
FOR ANNUAL BALL CLASSIC

oring for box seats for the impend-
ing fray.
Representative Kelly of Pennsyl-
vania. Republican diamond king, and
Representative Mcmillan of South
Carolina, chief of the Democratic
nine, have announced tentative line.
ups The batteries are: Republicans
Montgomery of Oklahoma and
Updyie of Indiana; Democrats
Busby If Mississippi and Mcmillan.
Displayed all over the House side
of the capitol are posters advertising
the contest. They depict the Demo-
cratic donkey crouched behind the
plate, shouting:
Come on, let's get him!"
The G. o. p. elephant is at bat,
exclaiming:
well, put 1t over
Meanwhile, government printers
are hopeful that members will not at
tempt to explain errors by extending
their post mortems in the Congress
ional Record.
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1926-04-29

WASHINGTON, d. c., April %.
CP)-The sandlot spirit of the small
boy is beginning TO break through the
congressional dignity of House mem
hers with the approach of Saturday,
when the Democratic and Republi-
can baseball teams will clash for the
1926 political championship"
Members fortunate enough to have
captured a place in their party's line
up are looked upon with envy by their
colleagues, and each side is boasting
of the prowess and power of their
respective pitchers. Any inference
that the game will be a contest be-
tween "has-beens" and "never-wases. ="
however, is looked upon as high
crime and misdemeanor warrantins
immediate impeachment.
Considerable protest was heard yes
terday from one member over the
price of admission-one dollar. For
some reason, he said, his family,
which never attends pro games at
the American League Park, is clam
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1926-04-29
Far East Trade
Topic of COnfab

CHARLESTON, S. c., April %
Op)-Trade with the Far East and
South Africa dominated discussions in
the second days sessions of the For
eign Trades council in the thirteenth
annual convention in session here to-
day, with the European situation com
ing in for a share of the iimelight.
DR.. Jermiah J. links, president OF
the Alexander Hamilton Institute OF
New York, and Eric H. Bouw, trade
commissioner Of the Union of South
Africa, both touched on the problems
Of Far Eastern and South African
trade.
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1926-04-29

Many women seem TO have been
born with extraordinary health, and
no excuses of work, pleasure or
eating have any bad effect on their
constitution as long as they have the
natural vigor and vitality of their
youth.
But there comes time in every
woman's life when her nerve force
vitality and powers Of endurance are
put to the supreme test. Thousands
Of women have passed through all
the other ordeals which try womens
strength and health, only to become
nervous, pain-racked wrecks While
undergoing the miraculous transfer
nation known as the change OF
life"
1t is because this trial comes later
on in life when the supply OF nerve
force, energy and vitality is lowest,
that il so often causes untold pain
and suffering and results in such Sc
rious after-effects.
If you could see and talk to some
of the thousands of women who have
been assisted through this trying pc
riod to a happy, healthy middle age,
by the consistent use Of st. Joseph's
q. F. p, you would believe, as Mrs.
Rios and many others are now con-
WINGED, that it is foolish to try I'M
certain means of relief when you can
depend Oh st. Joscph's G. T. r.
Mrs. Citro +. Rios, well known in
our city for her kindness and good
ness, who lives at 10J Merida St., is
one of the many San Antonio women
who are coming right out in public
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1926-04-29
Western Humorist
Dick Wick Hall Dies

LOS ANGELES, April 29.-R-
Dick Wick Hall of Salome, Ariz.,
western humorist, died in a hospital
here yesterday after an illness of two
weeks.
Hall, who was 4S years old, had
been newspaper man, mining man
and real estate dealer in Arizona for
20 years. He became known national
ly about three years ago with the pub
LEGATION of his humorous column.
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1926-04-29
Huge News Print
Firm Chartered

TORONTO, Ont, April 29.-R-
Announcement is made that the
Spruce Falls Power and Paper Com
pany has been granted a provincial
charter for operations at and near
Kapuskasing, Ont. The project in
wolves an investment of $4,000, 900.
The company will have a daily pro-
duction of 500 tons of newsprint pa
per and upwards of 100 tons Of sui
phite. 1t also will develop hydro-elec-
trio energy. 1t is stated that New
York publishers will take the entire
output of the concerns paper.
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1926-04-29
.Soviets Study Big
u. s. Power Plants

WASHINGTON. April 29.-GR-
Four Russian engineers making n
three months tour of the United
sites in preparation for construction
on the Dnieper river in the Ukraine
of what they claim will be Europe's
largest bydro-e actrical development.
have concluded a series of informal
conferences with Department of Com
merce power experts.
After a stop in Baltimore today
the party will inspect power plants
over the United States.
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1926-04-29
MAR R LACE ACE
f D R WOMEN
SET At q
Professor Lists Causes of
Failures, Stressing
Immaturity.

RICHMOND, April 2e.-P)-Tht
best age for women to marry is be
tween n and %, and for men be
tween Is and 80, in the opinion Of
Professor Hornell Hart Of the gradu
ate department Of Bryn Hawr Col
lege.
One of the principal speakers in
discussion of the divorce evil,
at the National Episcopal congress
in session here, Professor Hart listed
MS leading causes Of marital failure
mismating. sexual conflict, family
finance and immaturity. He par
sicularly stressed the last named as
leading to bankrupt" marriages.
HELP COUPLES. ~
With the Rev. Charles n. Lathrop
Of New York, he thought the church
could perform a valuable service by
helping engaged couples 70 obtain au-
thoritative books of instruction. Con-
ccding that the problem 'b:istles with
difficulties the Rev. Lathrop also
suggested that the church forbid the
marriage Of couples who are not COM
municants by its clergy.
Marriages do not often hit the
rocks with suddenness," Professor
Hart said. Rather, it is a gradual
process. The business Of building n
family was not begun wisely and
with clear vision; yet the church
very often was in contact with :he
family while the foundations of the
home were rotting out"
URGES INTERVENTION.
He urged intervention by the
church to prevent such failures and
restore the solvency and sacreiness
of the marriage VOW.
-The highest contribution which
the clergyman can make to the king
dom Of heaven is in his daily labor
with the people he touches" ne de-
clared.
1.-THE relationship between husband
and wife is one of the central prob
lens needing the solvent Of the spirit
Of Jesus. In proportion as the clergy
man can create local units Of the
kingdom of Heaven in individual fam
lilies which otherwise would become
the outposts of hell, he demonstrates
the reality Of religion"
He stressed the importance Of hus-
ban1 and wife making conscious eff
forts TO keep minor conflicts from
rystallizing into threats menacing to
the happiness and sanctity Of the
homo.
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1926-04-29

to praise this medicine. She says:
Il have been a great sufferer for
several years, in fact ever since the
'change of life" began. There were
great pains through and through my
abdomen, had indigestion so badly
my stomach would swell up; my
head ached, 1 had hot flashes and
then shivery, cold sensations and was
SO nervous / could hardly live.
Although l had tried many medi-
cines, nothing did me any good until
l started G. +. p. Now I'm on the
fourth bottle anu am so much better
Of all these troubles-even the hot
flashes-and besides being free from
pain, I sleep well and relish my
meals.
1T seems to me G.. F. p. is the
most wonderful medicine made. and
L only wish had known about it
years ago, so i could have saved my
self so much suffering, and my dear
ones all the worry and expense my
illness has caused"
In many instances where the
same symptoms are indicated as
mentioned above, St Joseph's
Antiseptic Powder used exter-
nally In connection with st. Jo-
ssDh's G. =. z. will be found
very soothing. Dealers every
where sell the Antiseptic Pow
der and C. r. p. as a complete
treatment for sl.5O.
II ysur dealer un't supply
you, send his name to the 81.
Josephs' Laboratories, Memphis.
Tenn, along with {1.50 for the
treatment. or Sl.O0 IL you only
want @. +. p, and they will
send your order by return mail
10 your dealer, who will deliver
It 10 you, thus saving you post
age.
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1926-04-29
ADVERTISEMENT
6;iji@{$ t:?:'':: q!
" Of haSnesia

of bicarbonate of soda, leaving the
stomach sweet and free from all
gases. Besides, it neutralizes acid
lamentations in the bowels an:
gently urges this souring waste from
the system without purging. 1t is
far more pleasant to take than soda.
Try a 25c Bottle
Insist upon phillips" Twenty
five cent and fifty cent bottles, any
drug store.
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1926-04-29

Instead Of soda hereafter take a
little Phillips Milk of Magnesia" in
water any time for indigestion or
sour, acid, gassy stomach, and relief
uill cnrnn instantly
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1926-04-29
Better Than Soda

For fifty years genuine Phillips
Milk of Magnesia" has been pre-
scribed by physicians because it over
comes three times as much acid in
the stomach as a saturated solution
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1926-02-08
The Masters Voice.

Although at present the 1talo-
German outburst of feeling consists
merely of the making of faces" it
has its serious possibilities. The
chance of war Is. of course. extremely
remote. Neither Germany nor Italy
is in position to draw arms. And,
moreover. Germany has no specific
status, even as possible belligerent,
for the dispute relates not to former
German subjects in the upper Adige,
but to ex-Austrians. Herein, however,
lies the real significance Of the mat
ter. The government at Berlin, hav-
ing not even past jurisdiction over
the expatriated Austrian Tyrolese,
who are now under Italian SOW
ereignty, is nevertheless regarded as
their particular friend because of the
belief. that German-Austrian union is
contemplated as one Of the possibili-
ties of the future. In short, the status
of these ex-Austrisns Of tho Adige Is
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1926-02-08
Prince and Jinx.

From the Philadelphia Evening Bulletin
Just an ordinary tumble" is the
characterization given 10y the Prince
Of Wales to his latest equestrian mis-
hap. Thus the heir to the British
throne displays his wonderful sense
Of world values, for Ordinary" as
we are informed by the dictionary,
means "of common or everyday oc-
currenCe, customary. usual, accord
ing to an established order, regular,
normal"
Tumbling from a horse has become
a common occurrence with the prince.
AS the whole world has noted It is
his customary and usual procedure.
He has been Curiously preserved from
these accidents While on his far flung
peregrinations. but when at home and
following the established order of his
life falling from a horse spells reg
ularlty and normally for him.
For several years the princes mis-
adventures as d horseman have been
the subject of standing joke. but
the matter is serious and it is so re-
garded by the English people. The
prince is popular and the people do
not want to see their future king
killed or crippled for life. There has
been a revival of the talk about some
measure to prevent this recurrent
risk. but what preventive step would
be possible?
This is the fifteenth fall that the
prince has had in the past five years
1t seems high time for something 10
he done about it, If anything can he
done. The frequency of his tumbles
is not necessarily evidence of poor
horsemanShip. On the contrary, it
is said that the prince Is an expert
but overiaring rider. Possibly he is
accompanied always by an equestrian
jinX.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1926-02-08

none Of Germany's business. But evil
IDENTIFY in Rome it is suspected that
Germany may make it her business.
Mussolini's words were unusually
direct and significant. In normal con-
ditions such n speech would lead to
countries. But these are not normal
times. A dozen years ago such a
statement at Rome would be regarded
as an invitation to fight. The Ger
many of 1926, however, is not the Ger
many of early 1914. Nor is the Italy
of 1926 the Italy of 1914. And therein
lies the reason why Mussolini's words
are being studied with gravity by not
only Germany but the other EuSopean
powers. Do they portend a spirit Of
Imperialism at Rome?
OF immediate and specific impor-
lance is the possibility that Mussolini's
challenge may cause Il postponement
of Germany's entry into the League
of Nations. Berlin cannot, of course,
fail to take cogniZance of the TRADE.
1t will have To make rejonder, and
the hint comes from Berlin that al
though it is recognized there that the
words of the Bavarian premier, which
provoked Mussolini's statement, We're
irregular and unwarranted. the Italian
dictatorSmust be put in his place"
1t is Il new experience to hear the
masters voice" coming from Rome.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1926-02-08
French War Losses.

French StatiSticianS have been com
plhnS the casualties of the Great War,
with a result that is explanatory of
the difficulty which France has ex-
pcrlenccd III recovering economically
from tho great sacrifice of 1914-1S.
Tho total loss of French lives during
the struggle was ,363.OOO men. OF
these 1Il3.U06 were from the aSricul-
tural, industrial, commercial. civil
service and liberal professional classes,
ur 10.S per cent Of the total of O,577,-
900 engaged in those occupations at
no outbreak of the war. Relatively
the liberal professions suffered most
heavily, #, 900 out of 90, 900 of that
class having died, or JIG per cent. Next
anne agriculture, in which occupation
669. 900 out Of 5,500,0 died in the
ranks. or il fraction over II per cent.
The losses in the commercial classes
came next in proportion, 159, 900 dying
out of a total of 1927 600 or fraction
less than i per cent. In industrial
pursuits 1850 out of 1000, 900 We're
lost, or III per cent. OF a total of
800, 900 civil service workers $1,000
died, or AZ per cent.
The heavy losses in aGric ulture. com
merce and industry. 1858, 900, inflicted
., SrieyouS hurt on France. Even with
the addition of Alsace and Lorraine
The total population of France is to-
day less thac it was in 1914. Seven
Years and a quarter have elapsed since
the armistice, or about one-fourth of
H. generation. With continued peace
and prosperity it will require at a nor
mai rate OF population increase a full
generation to rebuild to the pre-war
strength in all branches of occupation.
The severest loss in France was not
duo 10 the depletion of the agricul-
tGral class, but the industrial loss.
The natural tendency of the French
peonle Is toward the soil, and the
agricultural losses are more easily re.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1926-02-08
East Potomac Park.

y plan for making East Potomac
to the people has been drawn by the
office of public buildings and grounds
and approved by the Commission of
Fine Arts. 1t seems reasonable that
the park should be improved in ac-
cord with the plan. A master feature
of the plan is that Il street car line
will run along the Washington chan =
mel side of the park TO a point per-
hapS midway between the steam
railroad tracks and Hams Point.
Near the street car terminus will be
cut into the park from the Washing
ton channel a harbor for small boats.
The street car tracks properly CO.
ordinated with all the electric and
bus lines of the city would be of
advantage To u vast number of cit
liens. y large part of the population
Of Washington goes to the park in
automobiles on warm and sunny
Sundays. hut most of the people go
ing there must keep moving" be
cause there is not nearly enough
parking space for cars.
\ great feature Of the new plan is
the building of Il 40 900 capacity sta
dunn near the northwest angle of the
park between the steam railroad
tracks and the Washington channel.
The capacity Of the stadium could be
1aroelv Increased aS q crowd roipht
require it. Street car tracks along
the west side of the Washington
channel would serve the stadium and
there are planned a track loop and
trackage for standing cars that large
crowds may be given transportation.
The third great feature of the re-
modelled park would be the cutting
Of a canal across it from the George
town channel TO the Washington
channel, entering the latter through
the harbor for small boats. The canal
Is drawn with curved and irregular
lines SO that il may be attractive
to the eye. 1t is TO be q course for
canoes and it would flush the harbor
for small boats and help flush the
Washington channel with changes of
the tide.
Two swimming pools. a wading
pool, a foot ball field, numerous base
ball diamonds and courts for basket
ball, rogue and tennis are planned.
IF the plans as drawn are carried
out the park will be transformed
into one of the largest and best pro-
vided public recreation grounds of
the world 1t is natural to reflect
that important changes have come
in the general conception as to what
a public park should be. Not many
years ago it was thought that pub
lie park should be a flower bed sur
rounded by a grass plot dotted with
signs Keep Off the Grass Around
the grass plot and along the graveled
walk were a few green benches.
There were a few great parks in the
United States. among them Central,
Paramount, Druid Hill and Golden
Gate, along whose roads there was
Sunday driving. There were also
bandstands and music and there
would be a public house with broad
porches where food and drink We're
served. The thought had not come
to cut Up wide stretches of lawn into
tennis courts, foot ball fields and
base ball diamonds. In those days
only q few Americans had heard of
golf