The Lambertville record., 1926-09-09
SMILIN' THU
BY GORDON COOPER
eDodueon forbidden by Dsrm'on Of the author,
4BY DEY WORKS Yo' SHELL KNOW 'Emr

/ The pOmpous negro in the Prince Albert coat ahu
silk hat had been trying for hour to interest Doc
Bloom but the latter was as obdurate mule. He
plugged right along with his lawn mower back and
forth across Mercer University where he was
gardener during week days. The pompous negro fol
lowed pouring forth eloquent flow of words IN pur
suasiye argument that made impression on Docs OBJ
| stinacy.
Professor Mount had observed the two as he en-
tered the college buildings the way to his class
room And he could resist the temptation to glance
occasionally of the window TO see how they were
making out The Whirr of the lawn mower prevented
any of the eloquent negro voice from reaching
Professor Mounts but the waving arms and dram
attic posses of the plainly indicated that he was
making the effort Of his life.
But Docs face was stern and set; his big lips were
drawn tight except when he screwed them up to spit
an amber Of tobacco juice with gesture that
plainly spoke disgust Back and forth he went with the
lawn mower pausing, and appsranty hearing not
word Of the eloquent negros appeal.
Professor Mounts curiosity became great that
he FASTENED to the campus his class was
dmissed He approached Doc and the vouble negro
lust as the lawn mower being swung around for
return path the campus The wearer OF the
Prince Albert, following close on Docs heels, was not
quick enough get out of the path OF the whifrhg
machine The blades caught of the voluminous cuffs
Of the eloquent ones trousers. There a choking
rattle as the blades to halt but not before an
indecent had made the leg Of the trousers
It was then Docs set expression changed First
the little crnkles about his kindly old eyes deepened
then his nostris disended and family his great mouth
spread to a grin wide that it made hm look as II
his throat was cut "Ah reckons datl make yo keep
outen nah wayl" he laughed
The sporty negros face was filed with horror
he viewed the catastrophe. His mouth worked in vain
effort to voice his Indignation but only series Of
funny gurge found expression Doc backed up the lawn
mower the blades released the torn trouser leg
and that the nky leg exposed thru the
rent wore no sock garter. Doc ehuckled Now
amt dat TO bad he said "Eveybodyl know no" DAT
you amt got no socks"
Professor Mount guessed that the dirty spats
about the negros ankles designed to hide the abb
sence of hosiery and he couldn't help wondering what
kind of underwear if any concealed by the sporty
clothing
just then the outraged negro found his voice, and
an explosive oath of such intensity as to blast rock
issued from his eonyusivey working lips.
Az the sound of the oath Docs grin vanished
IIuh" he snorted so dats de way mishernery talks,
is hit? Is dat de way yo talks ter de po heatherns
whut yo' 20 loves so much An yo wanted ter
come nah ehech ter take up election fer de po
heaherns yo loves mueh You whited sepulcker
Yo' yaller-liYered hippercrt!
The other negro was mad-he showed it plainly, and
started blustet But just then he saw Professor
Mount who had been standing quietly ntereted spee'
taor. He from the look of the Professors lace
that trouble might be brewing, and he swallowed the
violent epithets easeadiDe- from his lips With eff
fort collect his shattered dignity he drew himself
erect and addressed Doc; "AhH repoht yo' ter de
Mishunery Bod fer ds" And in ludierous attempt at
dignity with the mutlated pants leg Tapping, he hur
ried from the campus.
Then Professor Mount laughed. Doc joined him
with guffaw that voiced his appreciation. dat mig
ger minds me o de oil song" he said as he finished
laughing. And in rumbing bass of strength and
volume he began singing:
"De bigger de cloud o de smoke
De lttler de fiah will be;
De eastest size O. de possum,
Clim's de biggest size o tree;
An de nigger at camp meetin
Wild de oudest songs an shouts,
Is sho' ter rob hen roost
Befo' dc week is passed out"