davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Key West citizen. [volume] (Key West, Fla.) 1879-current, 1926-08-03
SURGEONS BIDS wAHTED
Why that unholy glee /?

While here can be no reasonable objection to
the custom Of calling for bids any contract i'm
volving large amount, the habit many business and
professional men have of chasing bids on small
quantities of printed matter is sometimes exaspsr-
sting tc printers.
In many cases bids are asked on jobs amount
ing to only few dollars, where securing the pro-
posas must inevitably cost in time and trouble
than any possible saving would repay.
According TO q story now being widely pub
lished printer got weary of bidding on trivial
jobs. and when surgeon asked for bids on small
quantity Of etterheads and also requested that the
type form he left standing. 50 thai he might have
the benefit Of cheaper rates for future orders the
printer wrote the surgeon this letter:
sam in the market for bids on one operation
for appendicitis. One. two or five inch ineis.on-
with or without ether also with or without nurse.
II appendix Is found to be sound. want quotations
to include putting hack same and canceling order.
If removed successful bidder is expected to hold
inesion open for about sixty days as expect to be
ia the market for an operation for gallstsnes al
that time and want 10 save the extra cost Of cut
ting
The Key West citizen. [volume] (Key West, Fla.) 1879-current, 1926-08-03
J NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS.
DAILY LESSONS in
ENGLISH
By w. L. GORDON
lesessesss=sssess.ssesss

Words often misused: Don't say
"the meeting convened" The
members of the board might con-
vene or assemble, but single
thing could not.
Often mispronounced: Btu
men. Pronounce the first syllable
"bit," the u as in unit" last sylI-
able "men," accent second syllable.
Often misspelled: Chaotic; 40.
Synonyms: Characteristic, at
tribute, trace trait quality. dis
tinction mark, sign. peculiarly.
Word study: use a word three
times and it is yours Let us
increase our vocabulary by mas
tering one word each day. Today's
word: Veneration: reverence.
His appealing words excited their
sympathy and veneration.
The Key West citizen. [volume] (Key West, Fla.) 1879-current, 1926-08-03

Just received one solid car load
of ROOFING. Special price. one
Ply at $500; two ply at $2.25,
three ply at $3.50. Priced for a
few days only. Wash Boilers,
the kind you have been looking
for, Infants white enameled Ba h
Tubs. Clothes Hampers, Clothes
Baskets all to be had at AL
BURY HARDWARE STORE.
aug. 2 & 8
The Key West citizen. [volume] (Key West, Fla.) 1879-current, 1926-08-03

y Whatever may be said about Ma Ferguson
Die and ali must admit that she is woman, and
p surprise would be occasicned should she exer-
xse the time honored privilege Of the sex and
aange her opinion about resigning.
The Key West citizen. [volume] (Key West, Fla.) 1879-current, 1926-08-03

Joe" Sears and Dan Moody Of Texas are two
q kind--theyre both woman heaters. Wonder
} there's Key Vest in Texas? Tampa Daily
E9nes There e Sniy one Key West in all the
t5rld, pleasant in summer and warm all winter
The Key West citizen. [volume] (Key West, Fla.) 1879-current, 1926-08-03
Stewards Al
WASHING "
LETTER lSs
BY CHARLES p. STEWART
NEA service Writer

NsA service Writer
W. ASHINGTON Trust as ex.
w traordinary senator as
James A Reed of Missouri to
have an extraordinary secretary
The f;Ict is that Hicklin Yates Is
far more than a mere secretary. or
even Supcr,secretary He comes
pretty close to being an assistant
senator Indeed. there are quite a
few full senator's who aren't as ims
portant as Assistant Senator Yates.
Reed Is very proud of his secre.
tarv or assistant. and he has reason
TO be Yates Is 4 unique possession
AMI extremely valuable. 4 se
u Fed has sd many interests and
such strenuous ones. he's on so
many Senate committees and
sub-ccmuttees and special commit
tees. he conducts so many investiga.
tons. he makes so many speeches.
time is so occupied and overoccupied
that there simply isn't enough OF
him to go around.
AS the saying is. he ought TO be
Incorporated
Well, in effect. so he is. with him
self as president. engaged In map
ping out broad general policies.
Yates. as vice president and general
manager. Is in charge Of the com
pany's actual operations.
EiOR instance. everybody wondered
how in the world Reed managed
to push that investigation into
the late Pennsylvania Republican
senatorial primary election and keep
up with his regular Senate work at
the same time.
The investigation alone ran three
sessions daily and far into the night.
I BY itself II looked as IL II was enough
TO keep the Missouri senator more
than fully occupied while Il lasted.
Yet he always was on hand In the
Senate chamber when the solons
were transacting business. mixing
into everything. debating and dis
cussing and Grating, just as IL he
had nothing: else on his mind.
How did he do It?
The answer is-Hiclxlin Yates.
WTHEN Reed was appointed chair.
w man Of the slush fund invest.
eating commistee. Yates. as his
secretary. automatically became the
committees secretary.
He worked up the whole inyestisa.
ton.
II was bis case. 70 to speak. pre-.
pared BY him as an cffice lawyer
prepares q case. TO turn over TO the
court room specialist who develops
Il, through the examination and
cross-examination Of witnesses. sums
up and demands verdict on the
evidences.
The Key West citizen. [volume] (Key West, Fla.) 1879-current, 1926-08-03

!. Places in Paris now being frequented by Am
stIcan tourists are scornfulIy referred to BY The
french as places where yankcefobia exists. The
French are quick to forget that that is the dis
shss' which won the World War and saved their
IissA
The Key West citizen. [volume] (Key West, Fla.) 1879-current, 1926-08-03

Ohio has Negro candidate for governor.
lew those friends Of the coIored race will have
I opportunity to do their stuff and practice what
biy preach.
The Key West citizen. [volume] (Key West, Fla.) 1879-current, 1926-08-03

wi.hstanding all the White House
Spokesman o. capacity Tor Keeping
his mouth shut
Cummins. 20 be sure. has repudi.
ated his prediction that Presidens
Coolidge win not care 20 be renome
mated two years hence. bur nobody
pays any attention 10 his population
The opposition party management
goes right ahead with sts comment
on what the iowa senator 70 sup
posed 70 have said. JUST az IL he real.
" had SAID Il Besides. there %
suspicion IN Coolidge circles w
Washington that ne did say u
The s.sxgesucn oy Slernp-ths
presidents own former private sec
retary-cf the availability ~ Speaker
Nicholas Lonswurin was even worse
Scared Of NIek
The Coolidge folk are almost I'D.
raittediy very much afraid ~ Long
worth. ont 90 rnurh on hfs ouu az on
mis- wife account Like other can
dTdsrtes, the Ohioans tad % remain
under . susheI % Car as any exprrs
sion from either Of The two long
Worths was concerned. until the
president declared nsn4sesg cot 81 the
p3ctare.
In short. cummins ard Slenn, o.
tween them. appear 20 have set the
ceuntry 20 thinking afsont sacges
scr 20 rressdsns Coolidge waseh =
sxarsly what hts supporters uanrest
% ssosd anasmuch As they Wers
en.efui 4 wuuld scrur 10 aabosEy
Il ne could poassfsy nave axy sue,
scr exfep. ssrnsslf
The Key West citizen. [volume] (Key West, Fla.) 1879-current, 1926-08-03

SURELY. You will feel better
next day If You sleep with an
Emerson Fan. iuly12-tf
The Key West citizen. [volume] (Key West, Fla.) 1879-current, 1926-08-03
WTAsHINoToN q Pre..d.nr

WTAsHrSGToN II Pres.dens
w Coolidge. up In the Atiircm-
dacks " as thoroughly ceAved
wtth senator Albert q Cunsrnins
and c Baseon Slerp ss ms trtsnls
here IN Washington ere. ,hen ne
must be very tretful president
Ccolidge.stes distinctly did nor
SAINT is7s presidential talk 20 starr
ii present
With th- corn cefs IN such : Ter
aenf Of dlseentent as Il a today 4
great deaf ~ ann administrator
conversation IS eanna 70 ee ouIxe1
INTO any sfiscussson AZ candldacIes
The Coolidge game obvlously u 10
Iie loe Cor awhile and hope Cor oetses
times Cor she farmers
Another ching So long as every
body continued 20 ssSume thai prest.
dent CoUit1gc expected renomfna
ton Il wss anEsoSsalse fos any rsval
tsFarans IN hts eMn party % an
n0Cnce ntHsseIs
They started q
%e.s, .-etv4y~s.vS. - ..s4....s $3.50. -.
The Key West citizen. [volume] (Key West, Fla.) 1879-current, 1926-08-03

|. People who swipe souvenirs from hotels would
J. somewhat indignant to get home and find that
me burglar had swiped their silver for the same
d
urpose.
The Key West citizen. [volume] (Key West, Fla.) 1879-current, 1926-08-03

The new Duyal street vhiteway looks fine
the day time.
The Key West citizen. [volume] (Key West, Fla.) 1879-current, 1926-08-03

/ Evelyn Nesbit does not ike Thaw's autobiOg-
bhy, and neither does anyone else in America,
he states the facts that are already well known
The Key West citizen. [volume] (Key West, Fla.) 1879-current, 1926-08-03

The fellow wtsc runs h NO onward
II he chooses he right direction,
tcopyright. 1928. SEA Service. Inc
The Key West citizen. [volume] (Key West, Fla.) 1879-current, 1926-08-03

rafds Of tina MA resolutions and obituary
a ices other than which the give
matter Of news. will be charged for at the rate Of
Notice Of church and society and AL other enter;
alumenfs from which Is to be derived VIII
se chargedlfor the rate of cents q line.
The Citizen Is forum AID invites discussion
n public issues subjects OF local general inter-
sst. but Il will not publish anonymous communica-
Ions.
The Key West citizen. [volume] (Key West, Fla.) 1879-current, 1926-08-03

1t may be hot. but fellow named
Luke Warm was arrested in Chicago,
Europe's slogan just now is Say fs
with tears in your eyes.
Bobby Jones. golfer. deserves an
other cup If he escapes the movies.
Working In q bank would be more
FUN If they ever gave away samples.
Dawes was talking so fast when
Congress ended he hasn't stopped
yet.
More millions for prohibition. Our
coast line Is q cost line. 4
An ounce Of argument is worth .
poke in the eve
Popularity breeds contempt
A. a man think-tb 50 Is he in bad
So,hing's more painful than
people who consider pleasure duty
Followers don't mean ybu are
right Bank robbers have many II
them
The Key West citizen. [volume] (Key West, Fla.) 1879-current, 1926-08-03

SPECIAL. To sleep well get
an Emerson Electric Fan. july12-tf
The Key West citizen. [volume] (Key West, Fla.) 1879-current, 1926-08-03

Followers don't mean ybu are
right Bank robbers have many IT
them
The Key West citizen. [volume] (Key West, Fla.) 1879-current, 1926-08-03

oshers are such bum drivers
The Key West citizen. [volume] (Key West, Fla.) 1879-current, 1926-08-03
LOOK AND LEARN
BY A. c. GORDON

o0eeoNe0eeeee .
1. What flower is symbolic of
August?
2. What president was nick
named Unconditional Surrend-
err"
3. What battle proved the
turning point of the Revolution
airy War?
4. Who was the Roman god
dess of the moon?
5. What is the chief city of
Wisconsin?
The Key West citizen. [volume] (Key West, Fla.) 1879-current, 1926-08-03
They started q

New canamlns ard ssenp nave SCI
ne Drrssesntiai oos a-soslsnS, nor
The Key West citizen. [volume] (Key West, Fla.) 1879-current, 1926-08-03

Answers To Yesterday. Questions
/. So times.
2. Kentucky.
8. Oxygen.
4. Sugar maple.
5. Rhode Island.
The Key West citizen. [volume] (Key West, Fla.) 1879-current, 1926-08-03

Eoihing's more painful than
people who consider pleasure duty
The Key West citizen. [volume] (Key West, Fla.) 1879-current, 1926-08-03

As man thinketb 50 is he in ba,
Worcester Democrat and the ledger-enterprise. (Pocomoke City, Md.) 1921-1953, 1926-10-16
DEMOCRATIC MAssMEETING
(Continued from Page ~

CONTINUED from Page -
more at length at later date. The
meeting adjourned between 1880 P.
M, and II P. M, and, by the way the
crowd remained throughout the even
ing, it was easily seen they were much
interested and highly pleased with
the programme.
All the county candidates occupied
seats on the stage including Miss
Bessie Bowen, Sen. Orlando Harrison,
R. I. Lednum, Horace Davis, George
L. Barnes, Jr., Godfrey Child, Esq,
Walter Dennis, Roger W.. Landlord
DR.. Paul Jones, Charles L. Mason, j.
w. Mumford, Gordon L. Burbage, I
J. Davis and J. E. Shockley.
Music was furnished by the POGO
moke Orchestra and the Pocomoke
School Bank.
Worcester Democrat and the ledger-enterprise. (Pocomoke City, Md.) 1921-1953, 1926-10-16
GREENBACKvILLE, VA.

Mrs. Henrietta Young visited her
daughter in Cape Charles, recently.
Mrs. G. P. Hearthway entertained
Rev. and Mrs. Prettyman and son, at
dinner Sunday.
MI. and Mrs. Willard Pruitt, Of
Franklin City, announce the birth of
a daughter, and Mr.. and Mrs. Samuel
Elliott, a son.
Mr.. Lee Lynch, of Wilmington,
spent Sunday with his parents, Mr..
and Mrs. is r. Lynch.
Messrs. Casper Skeeter and Elvon
: Merrill, who. are employed at Will
mington, were home for the week end.
Quite a few came here on the ex-
cursion train Sunday from Philadel-
phia and Wilmington to spend the
day with relatives and friends.
Mrs. Elsie Foulks spent last week
with her sister at Chincoteague.
Those who were present at the sup
per at Temperanceville, Wednesday
evening, were Mrs. Lynch, Mrs. w. d.
Pilchard, Mrs. B. r. Powell, Miss
Gladys Mock.
Mr. Robert Merrill, of Norfolk, is
, home with his father, Mr.. J. T. Mer-
rill.
Mr.. Charles Taylor has opened a
restaurant in the store house of Mrs.
Emma Hill.
Miss Winifred Selby has returned
home after a weeks visit with her
grandparents.
Don't forget the supper and box
social to be given on Thanksgiving
evening by the members of the M. E.
Ladies' Aid Society.
Mr.. and Mrs Bert Davis, of Pungo-
Worcester Democrat and the ledger-enterprise. (Pocomoke City, Md.) 1921-1953, 1926-10-16

CTS WI. WllSon, ueCeoseo'
In the Orphans Court of Worcester
County, Maryland. October Term, to
wit: October 18th, 1926.
Ordered by the Orphans Court OF
Worcester County that the sale made
and this day reported by John Fran
els Wilson, Executor of Francis M.
Wilson, deceased, made under the
power in the will of said Testator, OF
a lot, or parcel of land, with the i'm
provements, on Cedar Street, POGO
moke City, Maryland, be ratified and
confirmed unless cause to the con-
trary thereof be shown on or before
the 9Th of November, 1926; provided
a copy of this Order be inserted in
some newspaper published in Worcess-
ter County once in each Of three sue
cessive weeks before the 1st day OF
November. .....: .....
The Report states the amount OF
sale to be $4,000.
SAMUEL E. SHOCKLEY
THOMAS J.. FASSITT
ISAAC J. DAVIS
Judges of the Orphans Court for Wor-
cester County, Maryland.
Oct-16-3t. s.-4,
Worcester Democrat and the ledger-enterprise. (Pocomoke City, Md.) 1921-1953, 1926-10-16

In the Circuit Court for Worcester
County, In Equity. No. 1904 Chan
Gerry. September Term, 1926.
To wit: October 18th, 1926. r
Ordered that the sale of real estate
made and reported in these proceed
ings by J. Shiles Crockett, Trustee
named in the mortgage, be ratified
and confirmed, unless cause to the
contrary Thereof be shown on or be-
fore the 18th day of November. 1925;
provided copy of this order be in.
serted in some newspaper published
in Worcester County once in each Of
three successive weeks before the 9Th
day of November, in the year nine
teen hundred and twenty-six.
The report states the amount OF
sales to be $500.
SUE M. COLLINS, Clerk.
True Copy, Test: =
Oct-16-3t.
Worcester Democrat and the ledger-enterprise. (Pocomoke City, Md.) 1921-1953, 1926-10-16
POCOMOKE PUPILS SHOW
INTEREST In LIBRARY
Teachers And Pupils Conspire- To
Make Library Successful, Raise
Money For Its Support

1t has been truly said that per-
sons nobility of character and his
high attachments in the finer things
of life depend upon the manner in
which he spends his leisure hours.
With fewer hours of work for most
people and more time for leisure, and
with growing prosperity for all clas-
ses, the problems of recreation and
harmless enjoyment grow in number.
Upon how people spend their leisure
moments depends whether they will
be foolish, vicious, or whether they
will be wise, cultured, pure and noble.
1t is possible that no other single
agency has contributed as much to-
wards the best use and the enjoyment
of the leisure of life as the public Ii
Jbrary. Then surely the public Ii
brary of this city needs Severyone's
support.
Since the Pocomoke Public Library
has been located at the High school,
splendid effort has been put forth by
both teachers and pupils to make this
a growing institution. One of the
requirements for a first group High
school is to raise at least $50 each
school year for the purchase of new
books. Last year Pocomoke High
School more than doubled that sum,
raising $111.OO. The Board of Coun-
ty School Commissioners and the
Woman's Club each gave $40 making
a total of $131.0O, raised during the
school year 1925-'26.
Interest has been shown in other
ways besides the raising Of funds.
Fifty-four books were given by pupils
during the same year. The second year
English class, under the direction OF
Mr.. Bennett following the motto, If
YOU have knowledge let others light
their candles by it," arranged book
on the life and works Of Sir Walter
Scott. Tbs book besides being beau
tifully illustrated contains much help
full material.
However, the library is Of service
onIv to the extent to which it is used.
It is open on school days practically
all day, with teacher in charge. The
housekeepers will probably find 1t
more convenient to call in the AFTER
noon: the hours are from one to three
fortv-fve. Visitors are always well
come.
This institution, under the efficient
management of Miss Marian Stevens
a member of the faculty, has grown
out of a hopeless pile of unclassified
books which Uttered the shelves OF the
former so-called library.
The card catalogue Dewey Decimal
system has been effectively introduc-
ed and now every book can be easily
found under the proper index. Chairs
and tables have been provided for the
comfort of the reader or student. The
lighting ARRANGEMENT Is .restful ito
the eyes and a quiet atmosphere per-
vades the whole room.
Those who knew the wild confusion
and clutter of the former library will
appreciate the untiring efforts that
Miss Stevens put forth in her reno
walton process. She deserves the
highest praise for her achievement
and the loyal support of the whole
community in all further attempts to
make our library what it should be.
Worcester Democrat and the ledger-enterprise. (Pocomoke City, Md.) 1921-1953, 1926-10-16

Mrs. Martha Davis and son, OF
Delmar, were in town Sunday.
Mrs. w. D. Pilchard entertained
Mr.. Stanley Trader and family, of
Salisbury, and Mr.. George Smith and
wife, of Temperanceville, Sunday.
Mr.. and Mrs. Charles Mason en-
tertained Mr.. and Mrs. Earl Pickens,
of Philadelphia, and Miss Cathuart,
of Wilmington, Sunday.
Worcester Democrat and the ledger-enterprise. (Pocomoke City, Md.) 1921-1953, 1926-10-16

league, spent Sunday with Mrs. Da-
Wis mother, Mrs. John E. Hudson;
Mrs. Hudson accompanied them home
for visit.
Mrs. Winnie 'Dolan and little son,
spent a part Of the week at Easton.
mn STICIF1
Mrs. Elvill Lewis and little daugh-
ter, who spent the summer with her
parents, Mr.. and Mrs. ]. 7. Sharpley,
returned last Thursday to their home
in Haddon Heights, N. j..
Mrs. Layton Joseph spent a few
days of last week in Washington, DC,
Mr.. E. C. Richardson spent part
Of last week with his family here.
Mr.. and Mrs. Ralph Hoey and
daughtr, of Wilmington, were guests
OF Mr.. and Mrs. J. E. Bevans, Sum
day.
! Mrs. Hillary Sharpley had as her
guess Sunday, Mr.. and Mrs. Parks
and daughters, of Parksley.
Mr.. E Taylor and wife, of Philadel-
phia, visited Mrs. Emma Gray, Sun
day.
Mr.. Fitzhugh Pollitt has purchased
the property of Mr.. Hillary Cole
bourne.
Mr.. Roland Hill was in town Sun
day.
Mr.. and Mrs. w. C. Kelly entertain
ed Sunday at o'clock dinner: Mr..
Kelley's parents, Of Chincoteague; Mr..
and Mrs. Jack Kelly, of New York;
Mr.. Edward Kelley and wife, of POGO
moke; Mr.. R Hudson; and Miss Mel
lie Kelley.
Mrs. F. B. Hudson entertained
guests Sunday.
Miss Elizabeth Carter, spent Sun
day with Mrs. Russell here.
Mr.. George Dryden entertained his
father Sunday.
Mrs. J. T .Paradis entertained Mr..
and Mrs. Joseph Davis and daughter,
of Pocomoke, Sunday.
Mr.. Mears from Virginia, has o.
pened meat and grocery store in
town.
Miss Catherine Carlan, Of Whining
ton, spent the weekend with relatives
here.
Mr.. and Mrs. J. O. Sharpley; Mr..
and Mrs. Joshua Tarr; Mrs. j. w.
Davis; Mrs. Annie Merrill; Misses
Annie Brown and Ruth Mason, attend
ed the Sunday School convention in
Snow Hill, Tuesday.
Mrs. Carrie Jones, Laura, and An
ME May Stewart, are improving after
weeks illness.
Mr.. and Mrs. Charles Crowley en-
tertained relatives from Maryland on
Sunday afternoon.
Mr.. Charles Jones, of Wilmington,
spent Sunday with his mother here.
Mr.. George Sharpley has returned
from a visit with her daughter in
Oxford, Md.
Mrs. August Bartling lis in Phila-
delphia, where she has accepted po-
sition.
Mr.. w. l.. Worrell, and wife, OF
Chincoteague, were guests of Mrs
Worrell's parents here Sunday.
Mr.. and Mrs. Lloyd Lewis, of Phil
adelphia, announce the birth of son,
born at the home of Mrs. Lewis moth
er here.
Mr.. and Mrs. Dan Hudson enter
tanned Mr.. George Hudson, of Will
mington, Sunday. u.
Mr.. Clayton Collins and family, OF
Berlin, spent Sunday with Mrs. S. c.
Worcester Democrat and the ledger-enterprise. (Pocomoke City, Md.) 1921-1953, 1926-10-16
= Crockett & Crockett, Solicitors.
ORDER NISI.

J. Shiles Crockett, Trustee named
in a Mortgage from Philip Rodbell
and Ida Rodbell, his wife, to The Po-
comoke City National Bank of POGO
moke City, Maryland, body corpor-,
ate, ex parte.
Worcester Democrat and the ledger-enterprise. (Pocomoke City, Md.) 1921-1953, 1926-10-16
ORDER NISI.

In the matter of the Estate of Fran
els nj. Wilson, deceased. +-f
, 1926-02-19
3 BOTTLES OF CHAMPAGNE.
Servant Forced To Drink Them.

German Princes and Their Funds.
Not a pfening for the princes, " are
the words to be seen on an appeal which
is placarded all over Germany for a pie
biscite on the question whether the
twenty royal princes of Germany shall
be given the millions they are claiming.
Six thousand people attended at Frank
fort-on Main last night a meeting which
passed a unanimous resolution demand
ing that the Reichstag should quash
the donations to the princes
Where else in the whole world would
it be possible for the very man who lost
the war to eXtort enormous riches from
, 1926-02-19
FOUR BANDITS IECTURED BY
HOLD UP VICTIM.

Des Moines, Iowa, Jan. 31.-A lecture
on the folly Of bank robbery, delivered
by a young woman clerk, did not deter
four men, who took $500 from the
Continental Trust and Savings Bank.
You aren't going to get anywhere by
holding up this bank" Mrs. kathryn
Andersen. a sten0grapher, told the rob-
bers as they herded her and other en-
ployees into back room.
This is just a small bank, getting
we'll under way. It's a nice bank, and
it won't do you any good to hold it up.
Bank robbing never did anybody any
good"
The robbers didn't argue; they just
took the money. Boston American.
, 1926-02-19
TROUBLE IN HONDURAS

Washington, Feb, 7.-According to
dispatches, revolutionary adharents of
the Ferrara party commanded by Man
uel Barias unsuccessfully attacked the
garrison of Tala, Honduras. The garri-
son suffered ten casualties the revolution
isis escaping with their losses unknown.
, 1926-02-19
Wit and Humor.

An Irish candidate for the police force
was being asked a few questions prior
to being enrolled.
Now, what is the distance between
New York and Chicago"
I don't know exactly, sir, " be replied;
but if that's going to be my beat | don't
think I'll join the force
O'Brien-'Oi saw tn mon to-day thot
hit me wild a brick"
Casey-Yez did. PhweIl; phwat did
he say?"
O'Brien - Sbure. it's all roight. He
a@ppoIygized, an said be took me for a
cop in citizens dress. / f|orgave him
an said he wuz only dom his duty"
Mis-. Clancy -'Yis. Mrs. Muggins.
Pat and Oh part to mate no more. Oh
wint to the hospital gto AK after him. 'Oi
want to see me husband, SEE oil; the
man that got bowed up 'Yez can't
says the docthor-he's unther the idhoo-
ence of Ann Esthetics.' OF don't know
the lady, SEE Oh, moighty dignifed loike:
but if me lawful welded husband can
act loike that whin he's at deaths doir
DIN have a divorce from him."