The daily worker. [volume] (Chicago, Ill.) 1924-1958, 1926-11-14

uonaliErna Let me tell you that Tor
months after we became lovers stu
anticipated an act Of violence on your
part. hardly went to sleep without
lingering idea that you might kin
me, after ali. You had not the
strength to do t. You never thought
OF that. You found shelter and devo-
ton IN the eneny's camp, and you
gradually learned to talk his 1argon.
Is that romantic7
Here touch upon something funda-
mental, perhaps the most fundamental,
of all things. You are concerned with
yourself alone. You think Of the world
only as a source wherefrom to draw
conveniences and pleasure. It is al
ways you and the world. You are a
veritable enemy OF mankind; never
for a moment do you forget your own
self. I know this is not personal
popularity Of yours. It is charac-
teristic of your class. But what value
is there in culture. beauty, refinement,
spirituality, when It is all for oneself,
all, so to speak, for individual consump-
ton? theoretically, had none Of the
individualistic propensities Of the
bourgeoisie. A live experience it be-
came to me only thru association with
you.
All you blamed me for GOODNESS!
You never knew that flame Of exulta-
ton when a man loses the conscious
, ness Of his self, when a man is capa-
BILE of throwing away his self as one
throws away a discarded rag, because
he does not think Of himself, because
the bigger universal thing had capt.
yated him with such power that 1t
became his own life, his very sub
stance. No, with all your refinement
you never lived the life Of the uni
verse. You recited your spiritualist
poets, who, you said, were cropping BY
sheer intuition for the things expe-
rience can never achieve. What did
they know, what did you know, about
merging with things supreme. am
fully cognizant Of the fact that you
will not be able to understand what l
have just written down.
And then something else. Your ava
rice. You did not realize that you
became somewhat like an ant drag
glng things into its nest It was hid
eous, Maria, hideous! You seemed to
think that the revolution was made
for the express purpose Of furnishing
a beautiful apartment for you, of Sc
curing you box seats at the opera.
You even took it for granted that.
being the wife of state official. you
had to wear jewels. l could not dis
suade you. It was too humiliating to
argue such things. You thought it
your privilege to shine in a lodge with
a diamond ring flashing all sorts OF
colors in front Of my comrades. You
never thought Of that Ell? To you it
was beauty; to me The least
l said, the better.
Dear Maria, do not want to be
untrue to myself and to you. cared
for you a great deal | wish had not
become so much attached to you. You
are lovely underneath and beyond
your shell of bourgeois culture.
often thought you would be able to
cast on the old Adam and Eve. l saw.
l thought saw, seeds of a future love
Illness that would overshadow the
lpast. My hopes have not material
lied. | waited long and labored pa
tiently. l hate to give up a task.
AS things stand. must admit my
defeat. Better let US part peacefully
if We can.
You will think Of another woman.
assure you there is none. This much
you have done to me. that the women
Of my own class all seem crude and
primitive to me. The theoreticians of
our movement would say that associa-
ton with the bourgeoisie has placed