The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1926-09-18
THE MAJOR TURNS HIS HEAD ON GENE AND
WAKES UP In HOSPITAL
BY MAJOR HOOPLE
Former Sports Editor of the Bombay
India Relish

~ TROUDSBURG, Pa, Sept. Is.
| -Egad, friends, today I am
| able to recount to you the
most novel of experiences. 1 have
been knocked out.
1t all happened in a most peculiar
and accidental way. The other day,
while in conversation with Gene
Tunney, l happened to remark that
for seven years / was the champion
heavyweight of the Hebrides. Mr..
Tunney was delighted and requested
me to don the gloves for a bit Of
sparring. to which 1 assented.
IF you find the time suspended
heavily upon your hands, Major"
was the way Mr.. Tunney put it,
would you not condescend to as
sumo the raiment of the arena and
co-mingle with me in the donation
ard acceptance of several impacts?"
"Oh, indeed, Egad. yes, yes" l
responded 10 the scholarly young
pugilist's invitation to the boxing.
Mr.. Tunney. discover, is profusely
eloquent, marvellously so.
Promised TO BE Easy
at shall be my constant endeavor
not to be too very atavistic, Mr..
Tunney said next. "Uppermost in
my mind shall be the consideration
of the excess of winters and sum-
mers your pompous figure has ex-
perienced over my own somewhat
Neanderthal physique.
And. with this overture. we set to
trading wallops.
We scarcely had boxed a moment
when, with a vicious punch Il had
hardly intended to unleach the full
strength Of my ARM opened a very
tender spot on Tunney's lip. causing
considerable gore to spill therefrom.
Several ladies in the crowd
swooned at the bloody spectacle.
Looking over my shoulder l noticed
that they had tainted and 1 waved
to my second to take them some of
the cold water from my corner.
That signal was the last mental
image my faculties now are able to
recall 1t seems that Mr.. Tunney,
not understanding my attitude. es-
sayed to deal a blow of considerable
violence to my chin. and I. being off
my guard completely. fell to the
ground. Egad, it was the very same
punch by the way. which l had
taught Mr.. Dempsey few days pre-
viously.
His Personality Catching
After half a day in the quiet of
a hospital room I sauptered out for
a stroll about the camp. It really
has been amazing to me how quickly
my personality has established itself
here. On all sides I was met by
anxious followers of the ring sport
who feverishly sought my opinion
as to the merits of the two pugilists
who are to clash next Thursday.
1 have given the crowd several
valuable tips on how to wager on the
affair.
Tonight I nat one of the quaint
characters who has attached him.
self to the challenger's camp. His
name is Lawrence, Egad, Pants
Lawrence, I believe Mr.. Lawrence
RECALLED me with many accounts of
his adventures as an Adirondack
guide. while I told of my romantic
wanderings in Abyssinia.
Bare Handed Killer
Mr.. Lawrence, like myself. is a
man Of the outdoors. He told me
Of killing several bears and wolves
with his bare hands. I must say, out
of respect for the man, that l was
able to match this performance only
by relating the struggle and a few
natives had with a herd of ele-
plants in Sampan.
We captured the herd, consisting
Of about 200 bulls. alive, by throw.
ing pepper into their faces, Their
violent sneezes caused the trees of
the forest to fall in a natural wall
about them.
Copyright, 1925, NEA Service. Incl