davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1926-03-12

Text, "Swear not at an."-Matt.
1894.
r. WEARING Is a common prac-
dce among many people. Men
E swear everywhere and on all
occasions. Sometimes they swear just
for fun. 1t is no unusual thing to
hear profane language used In
hearty and familiar greetings be
tween friends. Many men swear to
make what they say emphatic.
swearing whenever anything excites
their Impotence or anger.
This practice has become 30 COM
mon in America that it Is considered
our distinctive national vice. Rud-
yard Kipling in his American notes
constantly harps on the fact that the
average American seems incapable
of getting through three sentences
without using an oath.
According to a recent statement by
Rupert Hughes. George Washington.
the father OF our country. set us the
example in this habit OF swearing
which has so fastened itself upon the
country he fathered. But there is
one thing Mr.. Hughes failed to tell
us. and that is, that the father Of
our country finally mastered this
evil habit. Those familiar with the
history of his personal life, knew
before Mr.. Hughes proclaimed It as
new discovery, that George Wash
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1926-03-12
The Place to Cut

The cost of city governments in the United
States increased one hundred per cent In tho
years between 1917 and 1924
Here is something for the taxpayer who re1oices
in the fact that he escaped income tax bill this
year or is paying much less than before to think
about
The government has Just completed its compfla-
ton of figures showing where the money of the tax
payer goes And it discovers that the modern city
is taking it much faster than Uncle Sam is cutting
down his running expenses.
The reason cannot be traced to bad government
to the form of government
The cities which boast Of excellent mayors and
faithful councils in little better shape than those
whose officials are handed them by graft machines.
The cities In the west and those in the east are
the toboggan with those of the middle west
when it comes to the plunge into debt
For while reducing national debts
and cutting down the interest payments loans OBJ
tanned for purposes, are piling them up in
cities.
There is little variation from the general state
ment that every man, woman and child in the 24S
cities having a population Of more than 10000 is
mortgaged for s105.
Each year, every man. woman and child is taxed
to the extent of than s35 for the support of the
local government under which they live
Figure out the number in your family and then
discover how many days you work each year to
keep up the government of your city.
For in the final finish, all these taxes must be
paid by the and women who work. 1t finally
comes from their wages
Economy in city affairs is essential II the peo-
pie are to escape this burden
AS long these taxes are paid, It may be
worth while to what the people get for the two
dollars paid today that they did not get for one,
seven years ago.
Are the police forces any more efficient? Are
the health departments effective? How about
the fire departments and the schools?
If the public is to keep paying Increasing
amounts for local purposes to city governments
they should demand the service rendered be worth
the price.
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1926-03-12
FABLES IN FACT

TT WAS A. BIT EARLY DASH
DASH DASH BUT ANYWAY HE
TOOK HIS WIFE TO THE BALL
GAME PERIOD FIRST TIME SHE
HAD EVER BEEN COMMA AND
QUITE NATURALLY SHE Piled
HIM WITH FOOLISH QUESTIONS
PERIOD PEEVBDER AND PEEV
EDER WAS WHAT HE GOT COM
MA UNTIL HIS WIFE SHOUTED
QUOTATION MARK THE REF
EREE CALLED a FOUL COMMA
BUT l DIDN'T SEE ANY FEATH.
ERs PERIOD HOW QUESTION
MARK QUOTATION MARK AND
EXASPERATED HUBBY SIMPLY
REPLIED COMMA QUOTATION
MARK THIS is A PICKED TEAM
PERIOD QUOTATION MARK
No use arguing about balloon
trousers. They're Just about as
broad as they are long.
Mrs.-Ldsten, deari think hear
a mouse squeaking.
Mr--And l suppose It'll bo Just
my luck not TO be able TO find tho
OIL can. A.,
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1926-03-12
YOUR
INCOME
TAX
NO. / G.

| A debt discovered to be worthless
and charged off the books OF the
taxpayer for the year 1928 may be
deducted from the gross income In
computing net income for that year.
The return must show evidence Of
the manner in which the worthless
ness Of the debrtwas discovered and
that ordinary and legal means for
its collection have been or would be
unavailing.
Bad debts may be deducted in
whole or in part. When deducted,
the taxpayer must be able to show
with a reasonable degree Of certainty
the amount uncollectible. Partial
deductions are allowed with respect
to specific debts only.
A valid debt proved 70 DO worth
less may not always be q proper de-
duction. For example, unpaid
amounts representing wages, rentals,
or similar items arc not allowed as
deductions unless included as gross
income In the creditors return for
the year in which the deduction is
sought or In a previous year. The
fact that expected income was not
received does not reduce the amount
of taxable income of the creditor.
Unpaid loans made to needy rela-
tives or friends with little or no ex-
pectation that they would be repaid
are not deductible, but are regarded
as gifts.
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1926-03-12
WHAT MEASURES
-SuCCESS2

The will of the Rev. Matthew
F. Smith. late pastor Of the First
Presbyterian Church OF Indianapo-
lis, was filed for probate Wednes-
day. The estate was valued at
$4,000.
The Rev. Smith attained high
rank in his profession. He was a
successful minister, beloved by his
community, an influence for good.
and In his career he accumulated
a $4,000 estate.
Seven years ago a young man
named Tucker walked the streets
of New York with a single dime
his entire capital-in his pocket
Wednesday his life was insured
for s1,000.000. In seven years the
young man has become a big real
estate operator and has made a
fortune that puts him in the mil
lionaire class. Doubtless he is a
success. He has the money to
prove It.
But what measures SUGGEST
Thomas r Marshall. distin-
guished Hoosier and former Vice
President, who died last year. left
an estate valued at $4,000. For
forty years he had practiced law
successfully IN Indiana His intel
lectual ability and integrity made
him an outstanding citizen. He
served ably as Governor and Vice
President. And at his death was
regarded as Indiana's most dis
tinguished citizen.
In that long and honorable
career he accumulated less than
the annual incomes Of Terry Drug
gan, frankie Lake. or many other
Chicago beer barons, some Of
whom are SicIlian gangsters who
can scarcely speak English.
Would such be rated more suc-
cessful than Mr.. Marshall or the
Rev. Smith? Some way. despite its
frequent use for the purpose. the
dollar sign is an unsatisfactory
yard stick for measuring success.
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1926-03-12
Times Readers
Voice ViezOS

To the Editor Of The Times;
saw in The Times that Mr.. Har-
gon OF the Indiana Humane Society
claims that most Of the dogs used for
vivsection purposes are principally
weak, scrawny mongrels.
wonder II, by that statement,
he means to protect only the strong.
wellbred animals that belong to
well-to-do persons2 I wonder, too, II
poor Old mongrel hasn't as much
feeling under the knife as the we'll
fed pet used to nothing but kindness
and good homer
amla poor dog owner. My dogs
are nothing but ours, yet feel that
cur or a mongrel can be Just as
in the finest kennel. believe half
starved cur that never lad home,
living on the scraps It picks up on
our city streets. should be treated
just as well In this anti-vivisectiol
drive as the better dogs. They are
of no value. perhaps. but they surely
must be just as sensitive to the
cY-uelties OF the ones in the labora-
tories as the better dogs.
Also. many of these little mongrels
are pets of some poor child who
would own a good dog If possible,
but, owing to the taxes and general
conditions among the poor, the child
hasn't enough food to even keep the
little mongrel or himself well fed.
Yet each loves and feels the same
as the rich girl with her high bred
Boston.
the little old mongrels, also the cats,
and stop this vivisection entirely. A
house-to-house canvas would get
enough signatures If necessary to
help the cause and dog owners and
some persons who never owned
dog are all ready to do their bit
toward stopping this practice Of cru
city.
We hope Mr.. Hargon never stops
until this State and every other
stops vivisection entirely, then the
dog thieves will stop. as they will
find no sale for the dogs.
The Times has always been for
better things than this cruel prac-
tice and has exposed several things
to the public. We hope 1t still con-
tinues this until every one is stirred
up enough to get busy and help the
humane society. But from observa-
lions I think many belonging to the
society are members IN name only
and don't interest themselves as
much as outsiders.
We have seen DR.. Conger, one Of
our greastest workers. removed
from the Office she held with the
Indianapolis Humane Society be-
cause she wasn't In favor Of giving
dogs from the dog pound to the
medical college. We have seen the
police, who should be humane, beat
dogs in the head with their maces
and leave them half dead, and we
wonder If these officers and mem
bers Of the humane society really are
in earnest when they say they are
going to stop these things. We hope
so and if our help is NEEDED we are
willing, but ignorant as to how to
proceed Perhaps with Mr.. Har-
CONS elp we will learn and we
wish hin speedy success in breaking
up this practice of cruelty.
MRS. N. SLAGLE.
727 Fulton ST.. City.
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1926-03-12
h HHRT IN INDIANA S y S1f5ShS

says only two lines burst. Well.
even two is enough to have go
bad at a single fire. The water
tower, which the fremen tried to
bring into action, proved unser-
viceable. The chief says It is an
old and obsolete piece Of equip
ment, of little value in fire fight
ing. Trouble was experienced
with the bumpers.
Not q nice record. It Is certain
ly disconcerting to have important
fire fighting equipment fail and
refuse to function in the crisis OF
a real fire. When such equip
ment is wanted It is wanted badly
though It spends most OF its life
In gltter1ng idleness.
Is the Indianapolis fire depart
ment-in apparatus and personnel
AS efficient as It might be? II
it isn't the city is taking unneces-
sary chances.
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1926-03-12
The UnknO7Un s Tomb

At last, 1t appears, military guard of honor is
to be posted at the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier
at Arlington.
President Coolidge has let it be known that he
favors the idea and just the details
be worked out, we are told the necessary orders
will be issued.
The President is doing the proper thing. No
other spot in all this broad land of is sacred
and more 1t means country, patriotism national
honor and all that, of course Just the flag does.
But in addition 1t represents that ndefnabe almost
Godlike something in the breasts Of 110000000
Americans scattered from sea to sea-that sublime
spark that kindles to a hot flame when danger
threatens and sets countless legons marching in de-
tense of home and country.
Yet, sad to tell, there are some, a few, in our
happy-go-lucky jazzy land that do not pause to think
of this when they visit the Tomb. Some sit on the
sacred stone and have snapshots taken spread
their lunches there and scatter egg shells other
picnic litter around. We say do Most Amer
leans, we are glad to say, observe due reverence
when they visit this greatest shrine But not all.
When first called attention to these things,
we suggested that the authorities follow the French
idea and complete the Tomb by placing above it a
classical altar of bronze and on it keep burning a
perpetual Flame of Remembrance" also that a
guard of honor be posted there chosen from the
most meritorious units of the Army. This we
thought would give the Tomb an added atmosphere
of reverence SO that would fail to be impressed
The War Department objected to the military
guard on the that no shelter was available
near by. Also because the entire cemetery already
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1926-03-12
THE ABSURD
FEE SYSTEM

The three deputy attorneys gem
eral, appointed to prosecute liquor
cases in Marion County, have re-
ceived 1922 from the county as
fees for their services during jan
uary and February. This revela-
ton horrifies county commission
ers who contemplate legal action
to enjoin further payments.
The deputies receive a fee of $25
for each conviction in municipal
or Criminal Court.
Perhaps they aren't overpaid
1t must be an arduous task to
prosecute bootleggers and blind
tigers ell day long and day after
day. And, no doubt. because Of
the vital Importance of the dry
law, the special prosecutors must
possess great ability and high le-
gal attachments.
But who believes they actually
earn, in their official capacity,
salaries as large as we pay the
Chief Justice Of the United States
Supreme Cortland greater than
paid any Judge on the bench in
Indiana2 The incident reveals the
utter absurdIty of the archaic fee
system of remunerating public
officials.
Up in Lake County the prose
cutting attorney last year re-
ceived moro than $4,000 in fees
from the Gary city court alone.
And an equally large sum from
prosecutions of liquor cases IN
Lake County Criminal Court and
the city courts Of three other
Lake County municipalities.
AS county prosecutor. he re-
ceived almost as much, convict
ing petty violators Of the liquor
law, as the President Of the United
States received for performing the
arduous duties as chief executive
of the most powerful and wealth
lest nation In the world.
Ridiculous. The fee system. still
surviving in spots, ties the old
adage, "the laborer is worthy Of
his hire" into knots.
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1926-03-12
FIRE FIGHTING
EQUIPMENT

Indianapolis, Of recent years,
has been proud Of the city's low
fire loss record. low fire insurance
rates, and the Wanted efficiency
OF our fire department-equip-
ment and personnel But we got
a jolt Tuesday and Wednesday
that makes our pride wabble.
In less than twenty-four hours
two fires in business places on
Washington st. near the heart Of
the city resulted in losses totaling
nearly S1S5,000. The largest blaze,
that at the Indiana Paper Com
pany, causing a loss estimated at
$4,000, was real big-town con-
flagration stubbornly resisting eff
forts to subdue.
Perhaps that fire is no reflection
on our fire department Maybe
the firemen handled it with all the
skill. efficient discipline and ex-
petition possible under the circum-
stances.
But at this fire FIVE lines Of hose,
It is said, burst Chief Hutsell
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1926-03-12
Tom Sims SAYS

Always doesn't long at all on a beautiful
moonlt night
fairly reliable sign of spring Is when the SHOWS
are postponed on account Of rain
Another sign of spring is when you have the feel
ing that you want to take the agency for something
When you see man thoughtful, disturb him. He
may be thinking up a for a new soft drink
Young fellows joining the navy now find the trorp
sers too tight about their ankles.
Better start In to do little work they miss you
when you take your vacation.
Maybe after Sampson got haircut he was Just
weak from arguing that he didn't want shampoo.
About the only real fighting army has done
since the World War with General Mitchell.
Copyright, 1926, NEA Service, Inc)
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1926-03-12
CONSCIENCE POOR GUIDE
Bathing Suit Inspector Needs
Diplomacy, Says Aspirant.

BIZ Untted Press
BRADLEY BEACH, N. J., March
12.-Samuel z. Lee. former recorder,
has written to the Bradley Beach
Commission. asking for the Job as
censor of feminine bathing costumes
next summer.
II consider myself qualified to de-
eide what is right and proper for
bathing girls to wear on the beach"
wrote Lee.
Many censors. OF course, are
guided by their consciences, but once
in a while that sort Of guidance is
bound to go wrong.
1.-THE Job OF beach censor for
which I am herewith applying is by
no means a snap. 1t requires
judicious use Of diplomacy rather
than hard boiled tactics.
There are sorrows as well as So
called joys attached to the posi-
ton"
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1926-03-12

is In military charge The first objection, OF course
is not valid in country rich ours and the sec
ond is less The entire cemetery being IN
charge of the Quarermaster General. guard at the
Tomb OF the Unknown is but a question Of issuing
the necessary orders The troops available any
way
The American Legion and other patriotic organi
cations are now backing the movement We believe
the entire country would applaud the whole
program carried through.
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1926-03-12
An Example


or Petey Pat was a queer sort OF
guy, who plcughed through each
day without batting an eye. His
job wasn't sweet, but he never went
lame, cause he knew there was fun
in his toll, jes the same.
It made little diff renee whatever
his work as long as his spirit knew
not how to shirk. He'd turn into
good all the sides that were bad
through making the best OF what
ever he had
He never sat down tust to worry
ana fret. but he tackled his task so
he'd always be set to stave off the
failure. the flzzle and flop. which
stand in the way of your reachin'
the top.
And why do I mention this guy,
Petey Pat? It's likely you'll won
der about It, at that. It's Just in
the thought that you'll all get the
hang Of the top that he gives to the
rest OF the gang.
It doesn't pay to borrow because
the borrower has to.
80
Prof. 0fergosh Sal1es figures that
no matter how many tires have been
manufactured in the last year, it's a
cinch they'll so around.
She shot an arrow into the air
It came to earth she knew not
where. And neither did the poor
girl care. 1t was the beau she was
interested in.
It's the irony OF fate that often
let's a Justice OF the peace marry a
couple who spend the rest OF their
lives fighting.
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1926-03-12
NOW, HONESTLY

ANOht LII
Course we've all heard about the
ups and downs OF the elevator man.
And we've wlse-cracked on how he
gives everybody lift, but
Seriously speaking, he really is
due for a word of pralse-which he
seldom gets.
Nine out OF ten people who yank
the handle that runs an elevator
greet the occupants OF their estab-
nshment with smile. And that's
worth something.
And besides-think of the steps
you're saved every day.
There's only room for ono crank in
an elevator-that's the lever that
works the machinery.
My idea Of an ideal wife rs the one
who razzberried the postoffice Off
cials for postmarking a postal card
from her husband, Atlantic City"
when she knew dern well he was in
New York on business.
Judge lands and a coupla million
office boys will soon be giving all
their attention to baseball.
One of my kids came home the
other night and said the teacher
told him to find the common
divisor." My gosh. they've been
looking for that thing ever since
was in school
Copyright, 1928, NEA Service, Incl
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1926-03-12
HAS OLD CATTLE PONY
Nebraska Woman Says "Shongai,"
Is Still Quite Active.
BIZ United Press

BIZ United Press
SCRIBNER, Neb., March H.
"Shongai," a thirty-three-year-old
pony formerly owned by the In
dams, is still the best cattle pony in
Nebraska, according to her owner,
Miss Laura Olson.
Despite the fact the pony is prob
ably the Oldest horse in this part
of the United States, it still requires
a good horseman to bride and
saddle Shongai.
Shongai was obtained from the In
dams years ago by Miss Olson's
father who traded a dead calf and
fifty cents for the pony.
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1926-03-12

When does the Doll Festival In Japan7
1t is the second great festival Of the Japanese year.
and the third day of the third month Of
the Japanese calendar It is devoted specially girls
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1926-03-12
Fork Is Weapon i'm
Waffle Battle

You can get an answer to anq question Of fact or
formation by writing to The Indianapolis Times Washing
ton Bureau 1922 New York Ave- Weshington. D. c. III
closing cents in stamps for reply. Medical
martial advice be given can extended
be undertaken All other personal
reply Unsigned quests answered All letters
confdential.-Edor. "
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1926-03-12

Please define lyric and epic poetry
Lyric poetry treats of the emotions and is primarily
musical. 1t includes odes eegys songs, hymns
Epic poetry is primarily narrative in form.
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1926-03-12

Is it true that bad luck always follows the
breaking Of a mirror?
That is merely superstition. There is no basis Of
truth for the belief.
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1926-03-12
What is the brake test" as apr

What Is the Drake test applied to auto
mobiles?
going twenty miles per hour stop within fifty
feet. Such a test easily be by marking off
a ffty-foot space the highway and then approach
ing it at twenty miles hour, and trying to stop
within the marked space.
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1926-03-12

Should copper be used in aquarium?
No. 1t is harmful to fish and plants. Slate, glass
and wood only should be used.
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1926-03-12

How should waffles be eaten?
With fork.
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1926-03-12
What is "Esperanto"?

composite langue. The directing principle is to
make Of everything that is to the civil
liked languages and to drop everything that is special
to any Of them.
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1926-03-12
MIR. FIXIT
Reader Protests Old Car
Parked In Alley,

city officials. He IL The Times repre-
sentative at the city hall. Write him
az The Timca.
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1926-03-12

When the old bus plays out. IT'S
remains often remain uninterred IN
the alley. II would appear from re-
cent letters received by Mr.. E1xit
DEAR MR. FIEITi A friend and
I rent a garage In tho rear Of tho
100 block on NJ New Jersey 81
There is an abandoned car and q
largo pile OF ashes and junk IN the
alley, which make It very difficult
for us TO get in and out Of this
garage. The owner OF this Junk
has been requested in a respectful
way TO remove II, but without re-
suits.
Why should some people be per.
mitted to clutter up the streets and
alleys with rubbish while other tax
payers and law abiding citizens are
handicapped in legitimate use OF
them?
Lieut.. Fred Drinkut now Is taking
steps TO correct this condition. II IS
certainly an imposition upon your
rights.
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1926-03-12

Is Helen Taft, the daughter of ex-President
Taft the president of Bryn Mawr College?
Helen Manning Taft is the dean Of the college. She
was appointed In September, 1925
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1926-03-12

DEAR MR.. FIXIT: On Feb I !
wrote you n letter with reference 20
the condition OF Michigan st., from
Sherman DR.. 10 Emerson Ave.
rather expected a reply through the
columns Of The Times. WIN you
please let me know why this has not
been done7
FRANK q. sunk.
81 Bancroft Ave.
Affairs oftentimes move slowly AZ
the city hall. However, the board ~
works is now taking steps 10 compel
the Indianapolis Street Railway 20
maintain the paving between its
tracks and 70 repair all streets pos
sible.
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1926-03-12
BY Hal Cochran

She searched her husbands pockets,
Which was quite a sneal1y stunt.
But, shuclxs, he didn't mind 1t. He
Got up and helped her hunt.