davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
New Britain herald., 1926-11-02
What \ Wife!

Greene; Can your wife prepare all kinds of breakfast food 2" Taylor: You bet. She knows her oats"
 -B. c. Bigler
New Britain herald., 1926-11-02
But Doctor!

Dr. Pearson: q recommend q clean change of environment. Patient: But, doctor. l do change 'em every Saturday night"
 Ted Osborne
New Britain herald., 1926-11-02
Topical

We read of an Ohio man who missed a rabbit and shot his hunt ing companion.
 That's not news any more. When somebody misses a hunting compan- ion and hits rabbit, THAT'S NEWS.
New Britain herald., 1926-11-02

Florida Florida's back upon her feet, We know this from the Sunday sheet Which once more carries views of beautS In Come-to-Palm Beach bathing suits,
New Britain herald., 1926-11-02
Three Cheers!

Three Cheers! Mrs. Jackson: "Oh. I think hav- ing triplets is so patriotic.' Nurse: Well. anyway. the babies are red, the mother white. and the father blue"
 Earl Potter
New Britain herald., 1926-11-02

The meanest man is the one who doesn't enjoy movies because he
 can't spoil the show by coughing.
New Britain herald., 1926-11-02
Court Circles

No wonder Queen Marie won't wear These shorter skirts and says that they're All full of hoocy. blah, and static.
 They're not Roumanian they're Roumatic..
New Britain herald., 1926-11-02
SUBSCRIPTION RATES $500 . Year.
 S2.oo Three Months.
 75c. . Month.

Entered at the Post once at New Britain ss Second Class Mail Matter.
New Britain herald., 1926-11-02

Modern kids have it soft. In the lon; ago, only the homely daughters taught school.
New Britain herald., 1926-11-02
Florida

THE FUN SHOP NEWS WEEKLY
New Britain herald., 1926-11-02
Wx2Ss a45&A4eb 5A MAxSON EXKALI NnRk

Send all communications to Fun Shop Editor, care Of the New
 Britain Herald. and your letter will he forwarded to New York.
New Britain herald., 1926-11-02
Intelligence ests

Anything But Intelligent, Say Critics - Use in Schools of Doubtful Value - Trick Questions No Gauge of Good Quali- ties Needed With High Mentality-Many Famed Men Would Have Failed in Answers.
New Britain herald., 1926-11-02

Brevity may be the soul of wit but a judge who must pronounce sentence isn't hired as humorist.
New Britain herald., 1926-11-02

What the Sesqui really needed was an Act giving the people who attended it the liberties whose origin was celebrated.
New Britain herald., 1926-11-02

Moderns miss little. We heard many an orator in the old silver- tongued days and never actually heard a Welkin ring.
New Britain herald., 1926-11-02

The most subtle form of flattery is to use perfect English. The less a man understands it, the more hs appreciates the compliment.
New Britain herald., 1926-11-02

Correct this sentence: "John Is boss in our family" said she. but he always empties his own ash trayS,' .r.
New Britain herald., 1926-11-02
bray. and unnecessary use of biz words.
big

words.
 When a man gets to the end of his rope, he should drop 1t in the gutter, not on the walk. ! If there were no flivvers in pre- ] historic days, why did Nature pro- duce the kangaroo? Popular after-dinner speech: I'll do the dishes for you, mother. Having celebrated apple week, the fair thing is to catch cold and celebrate doctor week. You seldom see bad teeth. That's because people with bad teeth don't cultivate an open-face smile. A little learning is dangerous. Nature made the forests and the fools, but learned men made the matches.
 AS to capital punishment, or- chardists learned long ago that it is better to spray the trees than to throw away the culls. So one person in each five can drive a car? Well. it depends on your definition of the word drive" The meanest man is the one who doesn't enjoy movies because he can't spoil the show by coughing.
 Modern kids have it soft. In the lons ago, only the homely daughters taught school.
 What the Sesqui really needed was an Act giving the people who attended it the liberties whose origin was celebrated.
 Moderns miss little We heard many an orator in the old silver- tongued days and never actually heard a welkin ring.
 Brevity may be the soul of wit but a judge who must pronounce sentence isn't hired as a humorist.
 The most subtle form of flattery is to use perfect English. The less a man understands it. the more hs appreciates the compliment.
 Correct this sentence: "John Is boss in our family" said she. but he always empties his own ash trays
The daily worker. [volume] (Chicago, Ill.) 1924-1958, 1926-05-01

radio receiving stations where con-
certs and lectures on scientific and
agricultural subjects are features.
In March, 1924, the currency was
stabilized and since then has been at
par. Ut is interesting to note that
the New York Times still quotes in
its foreign exchange columns only the
pre-revolutionary deprecated ruble
that is no longer in circulation.) The
cheryonetz (plural chervontzi) is
worth $5.146 and there are new treas
ury rubles and silver and copper
coins, all worth their face value.
There are 10,157 savings banks and
several state banks. For two years
the government has met its expenses.
In the current budget the expenditures
for social and cultural needs are more
than double the pre-war figures, while
the appropriations for army and navy
are about half those of 1918.
Foreign trade Is government mon
opoly. The trade turnover between
Russia and the United States for 1924
20 was nearly two and half times
that OF 1913, being carried on mainly
by six trading organizations with
Offices in New York. The various CO.
operative societies had $4,000, 900
The daily worker. [volume] (Chicago, Ill.) 1924-1958, 1926-05-01
The Surprising Soviets

of land for cultivation, in the case
of citizens in the form of perpetual
lease provided the land is used. Over
80 per cent of the people live by agri-
culture. Before the war there we're
less than 500 tractors in the czarist
empire; now there are 1880 with
$4,000 more to be added during this
year. =
In the autumn Of 1921 industrial pro-
duction stood at less than Is per cent
of the 1913 output. Now it has recov-
cred to SO per cent without the aid Of
foreign loan. ANY citizen may start
an enterprise employing not over 20
workers or clerks. Private enterprises
employing over 20 persons and not
over 100 persons may be opened with
the permission OF the local authori-
ties. For larger enterprises a special
concession is necessary. The railroads,
air lines, telegraph, telephone and
radio transmitting stations are con
Quoted by the government. Eighteen
Thousand workmen's clubs and read
ing rooms have been equipped with
The daily worker. [volume] (Chicago, Ill.) 1924-1958, 1926-05-01

members in the spring of 1925. The
membership in trade unions is about
100000; the right to strike is main
tanned in state enterprises as we'll as
private factories. There are twelve
legal holidays for workers and two
weeks vacation with pay. The work
day is eight hours, with pay for over
time. In LAG dangerous occupations
the day is shortened. About 5000 900
people have insurance against inca
pacity to work, and over 100000 are
receiving compensation under this
category.
From 1921, to January, 1926, 1886
applications for concessions were re-
ceived and 66 were granted. Twenty
three more have since been granted.
Less than 20 per cent of the army re-
cruits are now illiterate, compared
with 80 per cent before the war. The
circulation Of daily papers is nearly
three times the. circulation OF 1918.
Military service is obligatory for from
two to four years during which time
the men are educated.
Normal diplomatic relations have
been established with twenty-three
countries-all the major countries of
the world, except the United States.
The daily worker. [volume] (Chicago, Ill.) 1924-1958, 1926-05-01

The following article appeared In
the "civie Club Bulletin" Of New York
City:
THE Russian information bureau,
Washington, d. c., has issued a
commercial handbook of the Union Of
Soviet Socialist Republics, from which
the following information is taken.
The union was formed July 6, 1928.
and now consists Of six republics.
Each of the more than thirty nation
alities has complete freedom to use
its own language and every citizen is
free TO conform to any religion or sect
OF none. The ownership of all land
and natural resources rests with the
state in trust for all the people; other
wise private property is recognized in
the civil code. The basis of represent
alton in the Soviet Union Is occupa-
tional rather than geographical.
The value of natural resources is
said to exceed that of any other coun-
try, especially water power, coal, oil,
metal and agriculture. Every citizen
and foreigner has the right TO the use
The daily worker. [volume] (Chicago, Ill.) 1924-1958, 1926-05-01

in Barcelona, Spain, in support of an
insurrection of peasants of Catalonia;
24shour strike.
1901: The famous May Day struggle
of the Obutchpy workers at st. Peters
burg.
y 1902: May Day demonstration of
workers at Batum, Russia, was met by
a massacre; there were great demon
stations at Baku ana Fitiis.
1885, During war between Russia
and Japan, the Russian mensheviks
appealed to workers not to stop work;
but there was a general cessation of
work and a great demonstration of
workers occurred in Ivanov-Vosne-
sensk. May Day proclamations were
distributed among RUSSIAN soldiers.
On May 10 began astextile strike, for
which many workers were shot.
1906. More than 10000 workers
demonstrated in Paris, France.
1907: May Day demonstrations at
tackled by police who killed many
workers.
1909: In Buenos Aires, Argentine,
May Day demonstration led to
bloody conflicts with police, followed
by general strike. In Moscow, Rus
STA, every large factory was shut
down, there were clashes and eleven
were killed.
1910: In Russia on the eve OF May
Day there were 10000 arrests; but
large demonstrations were carried
thru nevertheless.
1911: For the first time soldiers
took part in the demonstrations in
Russia. In Moscow there took place
bloody conflicts with a counter-demon-
stration arranged by the merchants.
1918: In Belgrade the Serbian prole-
tariat demonstrated against war. In
Russia a total Of 100000 people dem
onstrated. In the May Day number
of the Pravda it was shown that in the
previous year 100000 people had
taken part in political strikes. In Paris
and in a number of other capitals of
western European countries demon
STATIONS were held against the dan
ger.of war,
1914: In Russia there were several
armed demonstrations. Great strikes
everywhere.
1915: Appeal of the International
Socialist Conference in Zimmerwald
was isseud for May Day. The execu-
tive committee of the German social
democratic party published the fol
lowing statement for May /: 1.-THE
leading committees call upon the la
Dor organizations not to allow a stop
page of work this year ON May first in
view of the very special circum-
stances" In Moscow "A factories on
strike with $4,000 workers.
1916: In Berlin, under the leader
ship of Karl Liebknecht, demonstra-
ton took place involving more than
10000 workers. Karl Liebknecht was
arrested. In Russia four workers were
condemned to death by court martial
and executed for taking part in May
Day demonstrations.
1917: In Russia May Day was cele-
brated in 1917, after the fall of the
car, as a general national holiday.
-------------------------------
The daily worker. [volume] (Chicago, Ill.) 1924-1958, 1926-05-01
Calendar of May Day

The Petrograd proletariat along with
the Petrograd garrison demanded the
removal of Milyukov and Gutchkov be-
cause they proclaimed continuation
Of the war to- the end together with the
allies. Soldiers demonstrated com
pletely armed. Two days later there
took place bloody conflicts between the
proletarians, the junkers and the stu
dents. In Germany there took place
in all large cities big demonstrations
in spite of the state of siege. In these
demonstrations the youth above all
participated.
1918: In Russia-SoYiet Russiai-
the victorious workers, revolution
was celebrated with monster demon
stations.
1919: On the First of May the bands
organized by the social-democrat Hoff-
mann struck down the Soviet Republic
of Bavaria. In Germany there were
separate demonstrations of the Com
munists and of the social-democrats.
In Paris. France, May Day demons
tration was attacked by mounted
troops. From Moscow came the first
May Day appeal by the Communist In
ternational. Enormous demonstrations
thruout the Russian Socialist FEEDER
ated Soviet Republic. In the United
States big May Day demonstrations
occurred at Cleveland and Boston The
Cleveland demonstration, organized by
the leaders of the left wing of the
socialist party, headed by c. E. Ruth
enberg, was participated in by 10000
workers, about so local trade unions
of the American Federation of Labor
carrying their union banners. Red flag
carried at head of procession, also the
U. S. flag as law required that all
parades carry national emblem. A
group of soldiers attacked the parade,
attempting to seize the red flag, but
were repulsed by workers color
guard; parade marched on with re-
evolutionary music, but for six hours
violent rioting continued. Ruthenberg
and 100 others arrested. Two thous-
and heavily armed police were called
out; army tanks and trucks patrolled
the streets. Police shot to death a
police proyocator whom they mistook
for a worker; another detective was
killed. Also in Boston there was street
fighting.
1920: May Day of this year found
Soviet Russia in the midst of civil war
The day is celebrated there as a work
ing day for the reconstruction of the
industry of the Soviet Republic. In
Paris and Lyons, France, great May
Day demonstrations took place, in the
attempt to suppress which several
workers were killed.
1920 to 1926: The International La
Dor Day of May First gains each year
in Importance as means of rallying
the workers to the class struggle. AS
greater masses are drawn into the con-
scious struggle against capitalism, and
as the social-democratic parties of the
Second international are compelled
repeatedly to act openly as a repres-
sive agency Of capitalism against the
workers-May Day becomes more and
more the affair of the Communist In
ternational - and the proletarian
masses.
The daily worker. [volume] (Chicago, Ill.) 1924-1958, 1926-05-01

he congress decides: IT Is neces-
sary to roganize great information
al demonstration ats certain time,
and (the oonsress) therefore de-
termines that at the same time in.
all countries and in an 6itiesothes
workers should demand Of the pub
lie powers the fixing Of the working
day at eight hours and the reaIiza-.
tion of all the other decisions Of the
international Congress at Paris.
In view of the fact that such a
demonstration has already been de-
cided upon for May first, 1890. by
the American Federation of Labor
at its convention held 10 Decenbers,
1888, in sE Louis, wherefore this.
time is accepted as the day forsthe,
international demonstration.
The workers of the various. ma
tions must carry out the demonstra-
ton in such manner as the reIa-
tions of their country demand.
1890: This year extensive demon
STATIONS occurred on May Day in all
of western Europe At Budapest, Hun
gary, $4,000 workers participated. In
Warsaw, Poland, 10000 workers went
on strike. There were many sacri-
fees. Great demonstrations occurred
in the United States. In Spain the day
was celebrated by cessation of work
In Germany the May Day demonstra-
lions were not carried out uniformly;
many workers struck in Hamburg and
were locked out for many months aft
erward. The English glass workers
won the eight-hour day in that year.
May Day was celebrated in some parts
on the first Sunday in May; only after
several years were May Day demon
held everywhere at the same
time The bourgeoisie in all capital
list countries fell into a great terror
concerning the May Day demonstra-
tons, and made preparations for arm
ed struggle. In the United States the
Carpenters succeeded in establishing
the eight-hour day in many cities,
while other building trades made wide
gains.
1891: In Fourmies, France, the May
Day demonstration of 1894 was at
tackled by police, and nine persons, in
Guiding several boys and girls, were
killed. In st. Petersburg, Russia, a
May Day meeting was attended by 200
workers. Striking workers at Lodz,
were dispersed with whips.
1892: May Day demonstration of
100000 workers at Lodz was attacked
by troops, many workers being killed
1896: Vladimir Ilyitch Ulyanov
Qater Known as Lenin), in prison at
st. Petersburg, Russia, wrote May
Day appeal which was signed by the
League for the Struggle for the
of the Working Glass"
and circulated in the city, where the
great strike of 10000 spinners broke
out.
1897: Jewish proclamations issued
in Kiev, Ukrainia.
1893: General proclamation for the
first of May was issued by the Social
Democratic Labor Party of Russia,
which had Just been founded at Minsk.
1899: Big May Day demonstrations
The daily worker. [volume] (Chicago, Ill.) 1924-1958, 1926-05-01
MAX DAY, as the international La

MAX DAY, as the International La
Az Dor Day. is historically INSOFAR
able from the eight-hour movement
which spread thruout the world at
about the time of the American Civil
War and reached its dramatic climax
in the strike at the Mccormick Har-
vester Works at Chicago in 1886, In
1864, the International Workingmen's
Association, now remembered as the
First International" which was
founded that year under the leader
ship of Karl Marx. adopted a resolu-
ton declaring;
We consider the Limitation OF the
working day to be a preliminary
condition without which all other
efforts for emancipation must meet
it'll defeat. It is necessary in order
to recuperate the bodily energy and
health of the working class, that is
OF the great masses of every ma
ton. It is no less necessary in or
der to restore to the workers the
possibility of spiritual development,
economic intercourse and social and
political activity. We propose eight
hours as the legal limitation of the
working day.
TRANSLATED from the Germany
Twenty years later, in 1884, local
organization of the Knights of Labor
at Baltimore, Md, proposed that the
first of May of the following year be
selected as the time to enforce the de-
mand for the eight-hour day; but this
proposal was frowned upon by the ma
tional leadership of the organization
because of the popular tradition Of
May Day as a time of disturbance,
and Washington's birthday was chosen
instead.
Then convention of the Federation
of Organized Trades and Labor Unions
of the United States and Canada in
1884 passed a motion (reaffirmed in
the following year, supported by
the the promising young leader,
Samuel Gompers, to fix the first of
May, 1886, as the date for beginning
a united stand for the eight-hour day
thruout the United States and Canada.
Fhis decision of the organization
which later became the American Fed
Grafton of Labor, was the act which
resulted in fixing the first of May in
the calendar of the revolutionary
working class. From that time on,
May Day had the following history:
1886: Chicago strike on May 1; the
police brutality attacked the workers;
an attempt to ride down a peaceful
meeting at Haymarket Square resulted
in killing of four workers, and a bomb
thrown by an unknown person killed
seven policemen; then followed
reign of police terror and the hanging
Of the Chicago martyrs, the strike
leaders, Lingg, Parsons, Spies, Engel
and Fischer.
1898: In this year the American
Federation of Labor convention de-
cided to reopen the struggle for the
eight-hour day on May first, 1890.
1889: The Second International, in
its foundation congress at Paris, car
ried motion as follows:
The Kennewick courier-reporter. [volume] (Kennewick, Wash.) 1914-1938, 1926-10-07
+ + J. + + + + - + + + + I.
+ HIGHLANDS NOTES +
= = = = I. 4. 4: + 4. = Z 4. = 4.

The attention of all Highlanders
is called to the fact that next
Tuesday, October IL is the last
day for registration for the fall
election. If you have not register
ed in the precinct in which you
are now living, since 1924, do so
Fat once. The books are at Fred
| Speigleberg's for the Highlands
precinct and those for the South
Kennewick precinct is at E. A.
Miller's on Washington street.
The South Kennewick precinct in
cludes all those living on the So.
Highlands.
Mr.. and Mrs. o. Henson of XII
ona were guests of Mrs. Thomas
Hanratty Saturday.
Mrs. E. H. Sherk will be hostess
to the Bridge club next Wednes-
day, October Is.
Dorothy, Herbert and Wesley
Hughitt were all down with flu
the first of the week.
Mrs. R. L. Nelson drove to FL
lensburg Monday with Mr.. Mel
son. From there she went by train
to Seattle to enter the Virginia
Mason hospital for treatment for
goitre.
| A letter from Mrs. Jay Long
tells of their location at Orting,
where Mr.. Long is employed in a
garage. -. T.. Z ..
Mrs. Lydia Hess moved last
Saturday from her ranch to the
Tinker house in Kennewick, re-
Gently vacated by Mrs. F. L..
Fraser
Ernest Cox moved Saturday to
one of the houses on the Matthia-
son place.
Mr.. and Mrs. F. L. Rasmussen
received a telegram Sunday from
their son Ernest who is radio OPP
orator at Chomley, Alaska, say
ing that he expected to start for
home the fifth and will be here
this week.
Mr.. and Mrs. o. F. Sullivan of
Yakima are here helping in the
apple harvest on their place.
Roland Spiegelberg arrived SUM-
day from Seattle and is helping
with the apple harvest. He has
been radio operator at Tanakee,
Alaska. during the summer.
Mrs. Thomas Hanratty is plan
ming to leave about the middle of
the month for San Francisco to
make her home with her oldest
son Harry. Miss Ethel and Bert
will accompany her. Mrs. Han
ratty is one of the oldest High
lands residents and has many
friends whose good wishes will
follow her. Hugh Hanratty and
family will remain to care for
| the ranch.
The Kennewick courier-reporter. [volume] (Kennewick, Wash.) 1914-1938, 1926-10-07

5:illHI3x

We have few citizens in kenne-
wick who seem to think that they
can become bowling successes just
by bowling.
& & & & 49,
The weigh Of the trans
gressor is short.
= & & Il &
Honey, l see in the papers
where the. shops are displaying
their new summer hats" p
'Hmm. Well. you've been dis
playing yours since last winter"
~'t & & & &
He:-Let's kiss and make up.
She:-Well, do you expect me
. to do all the work?
He:-What do you mean?
She:-I'm all ready made up.
& & & &
.:.- We know some Kennewick
. l., men who can hear pleasure
knock with feather but who
could not hear duty knock
if it used an axe. ,'.-s..
: & & & & ,-.ss--
Man goes thru life with one
hand stretched out to grab
the woman he can't have. and
the other stretched back to
ward off the woman who is
trying to grab. him. .>t.
& & & &
Ross Willsey is greatly improved,
but is not yet able to leave
the house, much to the
delight Of his friends. +
& & & &
"Who touches a hair of this old
head,
Finds that a blondes brunette in
stead"
& & & &
FORMERLY woman said she
chad nothing to wear" in an
apologize tone of voice.
& & & &
A lady of this state advertised
for her cat which disappeared dur
ing fall house cleaning. We are
inclined to think that it didn't
take a firm enough stance at the
approach of the vacuum cleaner
& & & e
Father - That young man OF
yours stayed very late last night
Daughter:-Yet, daddy was
showing him my photo-album.
Father:-Well. the next time he
wants to stay late show him my
electric light bills.
& & & &
If a chorus girl turns up
her toes it's no sign that
she's a dead one.
& & & &
Many a neighbours dog is
ROWLING SUCCESS
& & & &
EVEN THE PRINTER LEFT
Eleanor T. Mcmillan. president
Of the society. presided and made
The Kennewick courier-reporter. [volume] (Kennewick, Wash.) 1914-1938, 1926-10-07
WANT FRUIT FOR SOLDIERS

The ladies auxiliary of the
American Legion is asking the
fruit. jellies or preserves for the
public to kindly donate canned
veterans hospital at Walla Walla.
One or more quarts which ever
you can spare.
Many of these boys are nearing
death and the most we can do will
be very little compared with what
they are suffering and will suffer.
Please leave fruit at City Meat
Market or Semon's. any time until
Wednesday. October Is. If you
have fruit to donate and can not
deliver it. phone I'LL and it will
be called for.