The Monmouth inquirer. [volume] (Freehold, N.J.) 1865-1933, 1926-12-02
Not That
She Cared
Copyright Puck

MIS- AAAUudAAAAAC4 . ArSO Nn0 LII
wear the expression the Wife's Home
Guide says that a woman's face
should wear when she meets her hus.
band at the door on his return from
his days of toll in the city. It was
evident that Mrs. Triphammer was
perturbed, and Triphammer braced
himself for the ordeal of hearing
about it. He had not long to wait,
He was hanging up his hat when Mrs.
Triphammer said:
What do you think, the Van
Slamms are giving big party on the
sixteenth and we aren't invited! Mrs.
Pettybone was In here to-day and
showed me their invitation. Said she
just happened to have it in her hand
bag. Very ikelyl She put 1t in there
on purpose to faunt it in my facet
The postmark was three days oldl
Not that care whether the Van
Slamms invite us to anything or not!
/ guess that when it comes to good
society we can go to places which the
Van Slamms never get chance to
thrust their noses! l am sure that 1t
AS III Rc4Il1C nO1Ol " NC 1AANACC0 ~
the Van Slamms, anyhow, and il any
one thinks that / care because we
have not been sent cards for their par
t. they are mistaken! The idea Of
What are you talking SO much if
you don't carer buttcd III Mr.. Trip
hammer.
Il don't know that | am talking. SO
- 7 f,fy, told hot
they were going to have big party
and we were left out Not that | care
9nything about it, for l doubt very
sauch if | would have gone had we
been invited Hetty Van Slamm's par
ties are always the stupidest ever. 4
lot of fat, oYerdressed, tiresome Oh
women and men, with music that Sol
ores teeth on edge. And if my di-i
ing-room was the little tucked-up
place hers is don't think that would
try to give big party anyhow. The
la time we were there nearly had
the clothes torn off my back, and
They have even invited the Van
Snythes right across the street from
us, and Mrs. Pettybone says that Mrs.
Van Smythe is having a new rose-pink
chiffon over satin made for the affair
/ think she'd better spend it giving
thu house a coat of paint, for it hasn't
been painted for ten years. but if
was Mrs. Van Smythe-"
Dinner ready?"
sit will be ready in few minutes
Mrs. Pettybone stayed SO long
couldn't get out into the kitchen to
plan the dinner, and the things didn't
come from the store on time. The
Van Slamms are giving the party for
some bishop or notable of some
kind they've got hold of, or pretend
to have got hold of, but you mark my
words, George Triphammer, I'll bet
you he doesn't come. It's only one of
Hetty Van Slamm's tricks to get the
people to come. I've known her to do
the same thing before, and the social
lion didn't appear She always had
q plausible excuse, Sudden Illness or
Called to New York. so he couldn't
come. l hope to goodness she will be
left this time-not that care but"
Cant you hurry up dinner?"
'The bell will ring any minute now.
Mrs. Pettybone says that she heard
that they were going to have an or
chestra- Think of them trying to have
an orchestra in that little housed
there are only ten rooms including the
bath and kitchen, and the two par
Tors are the only rooms of any size in
the house, and Ia like to know where
they are going to put an orchestra!
/ hope that not that l care where
they put it, but the last time l was
there to party some of the ladies had
to take off their wraps In what was
evidently the servant-girl's room, and
ifMrs. Pettybone said that"
II don't care what Mrs. Pettybone
said. | want"
Neither do care what she said.
don't care how many parties the Van
Slamms give without inviting US.
Goodness knows that we are not de-
pendent on them for our social favors.
I'd pity us IL we were! AS say, we
have social opportunities that the Van
Slamms would only be to glad to have,
and if Hetty Van Slamm thinks that
/ care because SuS u1uA AAVAtS uS ~
he~ little party she has another think
coming-not that | care to use slang.
ana not that | care what she thinks,
or says, or does. 1t isn't that speak
of the matter. It is only that
There goes the dinner bell I'll tell
you what Mrs. Pettybone told me
when we are at table. Not that ! care.
but"
Max Merryman