New Britain herald., 1926-06-05
THE OBSER YER On the City and Its People
 Makes Random Observations

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 tort that they had had the wire i first and were going 10 hold it. All this time the baby was gasping for breath and finally the mother rush ed out to a neighboring phone and calod a doctor Fortunately the other phone was a private line and doctor was secured with the help of the supervisor at the telephone office.
 If the private telephone of the neighbor was not at her disposal the young mother would have watched Ter baby die because she could not reach the doctor by her own phone f subscribers would only stop 10 think many such serious situations might be ayerted.
 Camping prospcctuses are out once more-out of line with the facts. at least As ever, they paint roseate pictures of idyllc spots which never existed anywhere outside the wild est dreams of an opiun addict. They tell of Natures own beauteous gardens" and virgin forests" and vast expanses of crystal lake" and all that sort of thing. And the prices they charge would be eXorbitant even if their blurbs were true.
 Some day we expect that the writers of these vacation pamphlets will tell the truth. If some company describes a place as Situate in q ycritable garden Of the gods" and some sucker falls for the line only to discover after paying good money that the camp is in the backyard of Q nitrate concern, he may sue. Why not" And then imagination will give way 10 research and fancy to fact. and we will read something like this:
 Camp Nuisance. Situated in 8 gorgeously inaccessible bad lands country. Can be reached as follows: by train. if any. as far West Jump ing off place and balance of distance on foot. if you last that long, No danger of wet feet. as it hasn't rain cd in five years. Water from ar fesian well tastes terrible but is pronounced healthful. No mosquitoes here. they know too much. All sorts of sports: walking, climbing, hiking, cross country running, broad jump ing over creviCes, etc. Come here once and you will never go anywhere else, even hom:. Rates guaranteed exoribitant."
 Or something like this: Beautiful Camp Idlewild. located in the heart of a dense forest primeyal. Not diff ficult 10 locate, as We maintain staff Of capable guides to find those who lcJe their way. Situated near beautiful Lake Glumpf, across which may be seen the picturesque outlines of the canneries. Drinking water impure, but ii is very cold and tasteful. Peautiful girls--every week in the movies. Many recreations and pastimes, such as killing rattle snakes, swimming, and dodging re- venue agents. Just the place to bring wandering husband (Wife)-- lie (she) cant get away"
 Or for the son of the family; Send your boy 10 Camp Bevosloppv, named after an Indian chief and 20 steeped in the lore of the Redman that the whole place is infested with ticket .calpers. Have the boy get a coat of tan--if tbe sun doesn't tan him, We will. Excellent food--obtain able by fora2ing. Impressive camp fire ceremonies if he is here here to attend them. Fine leadership provid- cd by the undergraduates at the Squeakenhausen school of Halfwits. Prize offered each season for the boy catching the most mosquitoes. On clear nights, camp can be easily reached by radio. Parents may call on Sundays but should stay away the rest cf the week as the place looks like the devil. If you want to make man of him. send your boy here and have faith in miracles"
 "Mr. Blank reports his house en- tered between i ?. m. and ?. m. and two ladies rings watch and forty cents stol| l."