davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
New Britain herald., 1926-08-14
THE OBSER YER On the City and Its People
 Makes Random Observations

latter persons history if not con- ciuding it. If we had a series of sharp shooters posted along the highways picking off the braggarts as they come along it would be best, but of course that would be impossi- ble.
 If thereswere some way of incul- eating the doctrine of driving with due regard for the rights of others our problem would be solved. This lesson would prove almost as diff cult to teach as the one drawn from charts, not quite. The oly possible solution of the difficulty that is ap- parent to is to establish a clause in our motor laws calling for the reyok- ing. of the license of any driver who does not have the proper regard for others rights. sUnquestionably 1t would be difficult proposition to decide whether a driver was the victim of some fatuous state czar on a motorcycle sporting a badge of the state police department and the temperament of a Prussian second
 lieutenant, or whether he was aetu- ally guilty of carlessness and a victim of his own inferiority complex. But something has to be done, the braggart must be taught and the way to teach him is to make it hot for him before he gets himself and someone else in trouble He is the fellow who cannot lead, he must be pushed-and not gently either.
New Britain herald., 1926-08-14
ONE FAMOUS NUISANCE
 LESS

We can pause moment to re- joice with Chicago in its abolition of the smoke-belehing locomotives on the suburban railroad lines in that city, notably the Illinois Gen. tral, the main offender along the waterfront.
 Here is magnificent lake front which from the south side to the center of the city has been be- smirched by steam locomotives since before the Civil war started.
 It required several generations of agitation to convince the rail- road it would be to its advantage to change to electricity.
 Finally the change is made - upon the 75th anniversary of the railroad
 And at that, the Illinois Central is the first Chicago railroad to have electrified suburban service, The others in the worlds greatest railroad center "32 railroad lines entering the city etc.-wlll follow suit by 1940
 They move slowly in Chicago, despite its reputation. It still lacks passenger subway lines, which have been features of transporta- ton in New York, Philadelphia and Boston for years.
 The city still has the T Will" slogan prominently displayed.
New Britain herald., 1926-08-14
STEADY INCREASE OF SMALL LOANS

The steady increase in the num- ber Of small loan companies throughout the state mentioned by John B. Byrne, state banking com missioner, is entirely attributable to the increase of installment buy Ing. The increase of a dozen such companies within year. putting more than 80 in the field through out the state, is evidence that peo- pie in modest circumstances are making it worth their while.
 Basically there Is no reason why the moderate man should not be able 10 borrow money when he feels he needs 1t. He may not have sufficient security to satisfy a bank: but is he has satisfactory se-
New Britain herald., 1926-08-14
Observation On The Weather

Washington, Aug. 4.-Forecast for Southern New England and Eastern New York: Local thunder storms Saturday and probably Sun day; not much change in tempera- ture.
 Conditions: The disturbance that was near Hudsa Bay Thursdayn m vas near Hudson Bay Thursday night is over Eastern Quebec.
 The outlook is for local showers and thunderstorms Saturday and Sunday in most of the states east of the Mississippi river. Temperature changes will be unimportant.
New Britain herald., 1926-08-14
(our apologies to K. 70. B.)

AOul tC "A. U. D. J
 In order to relieve the country from the flood of beauty contests that are fast transforming the na- tion's papers into veritable "Pe- lice Gazette" we offer for public approval the plant for a new type of contest herewith submitted. This would be the choosing of the posi- tion that offers the greatest pessi- bilities for saying lot in loud voice and in such a manner that none of it is ever understood. For no reason at all we submit for the committee judging the affair: Hem " L. Mencken, Calvin c. Coolidge Gan angler of note and president of the United States), Bishop Murray and Jack Dempsey Gan ex-pugilisD.
 First to be considered must be our old friend the vegetable man. He may be heard throughout the summer telling New Britain that, "Glumph way waw beorah nah pleeeeeneees pop tuamama!" which to the uninitiated might mean noth- ing at all, but to the housewife who has long heard the vegetable mans cry means that the vegetable man is outside and that the baby is due to wake up any minute and start crying. The vegetable man is an elusive individual, never showing himself when one is in need of a head of lettuce or few tomatoes, but always rounding the corner just as central announces that long distance is ready to talk, or when father has just barely tuned in on Sioux City and is waiting for the call letters, He is strong contender and will probably be big factor in the race.
 Next comes that fast disappear ing worthy. the train announcer, His regime may be on the wane, caused by the installation ef slee~
New Britain herald., 1926-08-14
THE SHERIFF GETS ALL MAD! (Nofioo Found bv Anna T pixyuftN

tNOtlCG round Dy hnld J, 1IZZuttll WANTED! J. H. Brown wanted for dastardly crime! Wire inform ation to Sheriff w. B. Smythe if this man is located, Name: J. H. Brown, alias John Brown, alias Jack Brown, sometimes calls himself Mister Brown! Age 36 when crime was committed, weight 158, height feet, 8 inches! Fingerprint classification 45-W-6B-9, Bertillon record: 34 Scar on little finger. Florid complexion. Eyes light brown. sometimes wears glasses. Wears number g shoe. Dental Work as fol- lows: gold filling, upper left cuspid; lower right molar, occlusal surface; upper left first molar.
 WATCH FOR THIS MAN! Toe nail on middle toe of left foot miss ing! Tonsils have been removed! Nose slightly pug!
 HAVE YOU SEEN THIS CRIMI- NAL? He may attempt to conceal his identity by growing a beard! This man is desperate. He STOLE my umbrella on the night of July 6, 1928, in COLD BLOOD!
 ARREST HIM ON SIGHT!
 (Signed) w. B. Smythe,
 Sheriff.
New Britain herald., 1926-08-14
IN KLASS AT KRAZY KOLLEGE ---- (Conducted by Judyl

Teacher: Now. Miss Minute, stop crying to see how sweet you can look, put your candy away, and tell us all about sugar Helena Minute: SShe was as cranky, as could be, She was as sour as lemon juice. I've lost all patience, Ma'amP said
 he,
 And sugar till her teeth came loose!"
 Ted Robinson.
New Britain herald., 1926-08-14

There ia now a special costume for al popular sports, except boat rock ing.
 The hard part of easy money is the getaway.
 The names of Pullman cars seem idietic until you read the names of summer cottages.
 A lot of men think they are over coming temptation when they are merely fearing the wife would find it out.
 It may not indicate anything, but the leading clamorers for Filipino independence are married men.
 It is estimated that the energy ex- pended to keep white shoes that way would help three million moth- CTS with the work.
 Once everlasting peace is estab- .lished, men can still get a kick by wearing gaudy uniforms in lodge parades.
New Britain herald., 1926-08-14
asleep!' !"
Louise Huffmare,
Like a Man

Like Man Mrs. Wilcox; .What did you tell little Geraldwhen you left the house this morning2' 5-. 2 Wilcox; T told him to go out and now the lawn like a man. Did he obey?" Mrs. Wilcox: "I'll say he did, He talked to everybody that came along, fiirtsd with couple of girls and fin- ally gave kid dime to nov it for hin~
 Mrs. c. s. Salmon. (copyrlght, 1928, Reproduction
 FeFbiddsnl
New Britain herald., 1926-08-14
KRAzY KINDERGARTEN

(Uonducted by Judy, Jr. Fletcher: Why Hedda, you have a big bump on your forhed!"
 Hedda Toothakes 70, thank you, always forget ware l park that gum,
 Fletcher: The plezzure is all yours, and the werd is 'shanty.' Hedda Toothake: My Aunt Sue Hoped down for a
 nap. As And nerso sed; Nov deeFs, not q
 peepi
 But soon we started game of tag And nerse hissed. "shl shaIty's
New Britain herald., 1926-08-14
KILLED IN ELEVATOR SHAFT

Boston, Aug, IA Rl-Themas H. Ellis, member of commercial pa per firm with offices on Congress street. was killed yesterday vixen he plunged through the open doer of an elevator in the office build ing and was crushed. The elevator operator said that when the, car was ascending, Ellis reached for the le- yer and opened the deer,
New Britain herald., 1926-08-14

Member Audit Bureau of Circulation. The A. B. c. Is a national organization which furnishes newspapers and adSer- tissrs with a strictly honest analysis of circulation. Our circulation statistes ara based upon this audit. This insures protection against fraud in newspaper distribution figures to both national and iscai advertisers.
New Britain herald., 1926-08-14
TAXES IN NEW BRITAIN AND HARTFORD

ln NcW Diitdlht HiioNfN"A
 a dozen other places in the state' an honest attempt has been made to apply the ad valerem tax equit- ably among all taxpayers, according to William H. Blodgett, state tax commissioner.
 Yh other words, the doctrine of special regard" for some classes of taxpayers, especially those ".who lay the golden eggs" = meaning the industries - does not exist.
 But In Hartford, the tax eom- missioner is free to say, "the sit- s uation will bear looking into.'
 Not that the Hartford assessors are delinquent in their duties, but they are using methods that are ."out-of-date, and wherever .em- ployed the results attained by their use" are about as ridiculous in one place as in another
 The tax commissioner, in touch ing upon the taxation Of manufac- turing property in Stamford and elsewhere, commended thought ful regard for the general welfare tof the community" and stated there is no sense in killing the gose that lays the golden egg
 The tax commissioners state ment touches upon vital topic that needs clarifying in many DOT tions of the state, particularly in cities like Hartford and Stamford, where too much special regard" for certain classes of taxpayers seems to be the rule
 Tt is submitted the commits sioner stated, that there is but one rule of taxation which any public Cdl IEtO6 DIAts lb pe1S'u on the theory that this is a govern meht of law and not government of men. In Connecticut the asses sors assume the obligation prescrib- ed by law, which is to set all tax able property in the list at it's true and just value. meaning its fair market value. The problems per SC is difficult of solution but it is made vastly more difficult by the dissemination among th&people of tax doctrines wholly contrary to the idea that the tax burden should be equitably distributed among all taxpayers regardless of class. No special consideration should be shown to anyone or to any class"
 The situation is this:
 In New Britain the tax situation has been brought to basis which meets with the commissioners idea of equality. That means no class is being treated differently than any
 
 other.
 In Hartford, however, and also in Stamford, this condition very ap- parently does not obtain.
 And this leads up to the possibil- ties of unfair competition from those cities against New Britain in dustries. For If New Britain in dustries pay their full share of tax stion. and industries in Hartford and Stamford and some other Con- neeticut cities do not, then 1t is patent New Britain's industries have more overhead than eompei- tors in those cities.
 It is the duty of the state tax commissioner to go after the Hart ford and Stamford situation with a battle axe. He suggests a commits sion of investigation regarding Hartford. Let there be one. The wealthiest city in the state should not be allowed to escape it's fair portion of tax money.
New Britain herald., 1926-08-14

Correct this sentence: Here" sad the mans brother-in-law, lis that money l "romised to pay naeK to- day." fProteced by Publishers syndicate)
New Britain herald., 1926-08-14
m.mn,r ., tb. A..ociated Press,

Member of the Associated Press.
 The Associated Press Is exclusively en- titled 10 the use for republication Of all news credited to 1t or not otherwise credited in thls paper and also local news published therein.
New Britain herald., 1926-08-14
Three Fat Men: Stop shovin'!"
And They're Going Fast

Potts: Whats become of that fel- low who was Hing Florida real estate around here last winter?"
 Adams; He's laying out subdi- visions for the summer trade in that new ice pack near the North Pole"
 70. D. Moore.
New Britain herald., 1926-08-14

The Beau Brummels of the near future may wear pictorial suspend CTS, but they will have to be very pictorial to compete, with eolcred garters.,
New Britain herald., 1926-08-14
There has been an occurrence

There has been an occurrence In local political circles This week Which reminds us Of the story About the Irishman Who was asked What he would do If he had his foot - Hepelessly caught. ... In a railroad track
  And he saw train Just about to hit him. It is related That he would try To Butt The engine off the track.
  Sammy sablotsky,. Democrat and councilman From the Sixth Ward, Is going to try To make the Council Mostly Republican, And close corporation, Indeed, Stop railroading laws Through that body So that the public Will get a run For it's money. But Sammy might as well Emulate the Irishman
  And try and butt A train off the track AS get falr play
 N Out of the Council.
  Nevertheless We admire Sammy
  For what he Is trying to do,
 'gN Don't you?
  We thank yeu
New Britain herald., 1926-08-14

Tho Herald i1 on sale daily in New York at Hotaling's Newsstand, Times souare; Schultz's Newsstands. Entrance Grand Central, 42nd Street.
New Britain herald., 1926-08-14
TELEPHONE CALLS Business Office .... e2b Editorial Rooms .. sz6

The only profitable advertising medium h the City. Circulation books and press room always open to advertisers
New Britain herald., 1926-08-14

America imports more nuts than any other country, and pronaplg develops more kinds at home.
New Britain herald., 1926-08-14

Many a flapper's idea of the three r's" is rolling her socks, roll ing her cigarettes, and rolling her eyes!
New Britain herald., 1926-08-14

Summer Romance An, how l olng tocrush you to my heart! An, how I long to crush you to my Or nose tor ears = or any other
 part! That ardent wish all others doth
 eclipse. Through all my dreams I hear your
 lew-voiced song, H So personal 1t seems for me alone. I hear you near! With yearning wild and strong l reach for you - but always you are gone, E
 You darned mosquito!
 Lee Shippey. Booze Will Do the Same! Love is a funny thing. *I It must be a disease r It made me wanna sing, And then it made me sneezei
 Natalie N. Norton.
New Britain herald., 1926-08-14
FactsandFancies
 BY ROBERT CULLEN

Softly. France! You can't miss the opportunity to soak thirty thousand former doughboys.
New Britain herald., 1926-08-14

And so the criminal class is large ly alien? Well, a lot of the early Americans were in that class, and they were aliens at first.
New Britain herald., 1926-08-14
Maybe

Travers; "They say now that it was not wine that that actress bath ed in.' A Nichols Ca parlor eamedian): Maybe it was nude'll soup"
 -G. H. Behr.
New Britain herald., 1926-08-14
a@M >> aH-y FSYx lfun,!ch0;b
 ~N MSoN SxH4lxytnns
Send all communications to Fun Shop Editor, care Of the New Britain Herald, and your letter will be forwarded to New York.

Progress, Progress, Folks! Moths got in bathing suits of wore. But they don't do it any more, The modern suits too scant of cloth To even tempt hungry moth!
New Britain herald., 1926-08-14

A democratic land is one in which almost everybody can get a kick by snubbing somebody.
New Britain herald., 1926-08-14

We'd rather be present when the first man catches a pie hurled from an airplane.
New Britain herald., 1926-08-14

A man isn't really old until he learns to think with his head in- stead of his feelings.
New Britain herald., 1926-08-14

Hot Diggity Dogi Goodbye Drugstore Cowboy! Lounge Lizard, disappear! And Jelly Beans - just say fare- welli The SOFA SQUIRRELS here!
 ,-F. P. Pitzer.
New Britain herald., 1926-08-14
Sure Thingf

Sure Thingl Cowles: T feel ambitious! I should like to do something. that would bring out what there is in me"
 Barnes: Why don't you take an ocean voyage?"
New Britain herald., 1926-08-14

We are a hard lot, and most oi those who scorn the lazy would SC fishing if they could.
New Britain herald., 1926-08-14
New Britain Herald
HERALD PUBLISHING COMPANY

Issued Daily Sunday Exceptedl At Herald Bldg. s7 Church Street.
New Britain herald., 1926-08-14

The only things man can abuse and keep loyal to him are a dog, a woman, and his stomach.
 If he's out to lunch and will be back in two hours, he is called an executive.
New Britain herald., 1926-08-14

It isn't necessary to go to the ant. Just spread out the picnic lunch and hel come to you.
New Britain herald., 1926-08-14

Entered at the Post 0fiice st New Britain
 as Second Class Mall Matter.
New Britain herald., 1926-08-14

Many fine fellows graduated in June, and already many of them have learned no. to crush your fingers when they shake hands.
New Britain herald., 1926-08-14

FUGITIvEs FROM JUSTICE
New Britain herald., 1926-08-14

The hard part of easy money is the getaway.
New Britain herald., 1926-08-14

SUBSCRIPTION RATES ss.o1 Year
 s3.oo Three Montha
 f5c. 6 Month.
Putnam patriot., 1926-01-08
CHAUTAUQUA HERE
 JANUARY 21-22-23

Putnam x to have Winter Chautau- qua. r. win open in the High School hall. January 2i. continuing on the 22nd and Z3rd
 The program arranged for Putnam is as follows
 ThnrsdaY. January 21-Concert, Petrie's Singing Band Lecture. Cap tain Norman A Imrie, America and Britain"
 Friday. January % Comedy Ora ma. "Give and Take" tA full evening proRraml
 Saturday. January 23 Magic and Art, s. Henry Ford and Company. "A full evening proRraml.
 Tickets on sale in the business sec ton, at the following plaees. Chair man of ticket committee, fver Nelson. Citizens National Bank; Y l.. Prince < Sons. C. M. Elliott. W E. Moss. and W J Bartlett In Thompson, Alex ander Maitland; Woodstock. Albert II Williams; pomfret. James Ryan.
Putnam patriot., 1926-01-08
AL The Ren-Grosxener Inn


 Mrz Alfred Hardness and her two erandsous, who have been at the Soutl caffaep for week, returned to Pro videHee on Tuesday
 Mir and MrS. William Spieer. Miss Splcer and William Spieer h. of Providence have completed their stay at the Main House
 Mrs. $. M Aeklev and Mis- Helen Cash having closed their house al Sten Lane Corner. Nantucket. Mass arrived at the Inn on Monday for their usual winter sejeurB.
 Dr HalsV De Wolfe and Miss Mary Howe De Wolfe were at the Main House over Sunday
 Miss A Kennard and Mrs. Sickel Sims. who have been spending tine New Year at the South Cottage re- turned 10 New York on Sunday.
 Mrs. Albert Lythgoe left for New York on Monday after a Christmas visit to her mother. Mrs. Rufus Rich ardsan. Captain and Mrs Gardner Richardson and Mrs. Ridler Davies also of Mrs Riehardson's party re turned Co Brookline, Mass, on Sun day
 The news of the death of Mir. Johr Tatlock at the Corey Hill hospital Boston. early this week. will be z great shock Go all those who for s' many summers have known Mir. Tat lock at the Inn. Every sympathy ii expressed for Mrs Tatlock in thi' great loss.
Putnam patriot., 1926-01-08
LARGE CROWD AT
 FIRST CARNIVAL NIGHT

A gay crowd snrped back and forth and around st. Johns hall. Providence street. Thursday evening and sremed to be enjoying the variety of attnae- tons arranged ta make the st John F carnival success Judged by the opening night it will be bigger ac= cess than was even hoped for nar
 ing the evening there were two act af vaudeville. the following taking partt Mis- Jeanette Authier Mis- Eva kfiE Edgar I.acier. George ialrHnazze
 Mis- Rachel Cain was at the piano
 The second night af the carnival Wlll be tomorrow night. and tomorrow af
Putnam patriot., 1926-01-08
LIVE WIRES ENTERTAINED

The Live Wire Sunday school class Mrs. W. J. Bartlett, teacher. spent q delightful evening at the home of NJ and Mrs. W. F. Wheaton. Mechanics street. New Years night as guests of Harry and Roswell Wheaton, mem bers of the class.
 Special guests were Rev James F English and Mir. and Mrs Edward s Duffey. Games were played and there were songs. old time melodies and college songs. with Mrs Duirey at ths piano and Roswell Wheaton playina the drum. Refreshments were serv, ed.
Putnam patriot., 1926-01-08
LARGE PARTY
 ON NEW YEARS DAY

\ large party of relatives was en- tertained by Street Commissioner and Mrs. Frederick A. Dumas at dinner New Years Day at their home on Providence street. The guests were Mr and Mrs. Eugene Brodeur and children of Marlboro. Mass; MT. and Mrs. John Tanning and children of Worcester. Mass; NIT. and Mrs. Flu gene Bibeault and family, Mir. and Mrs Burt Pincine and family. MT. and Mrs Daniel Columbia and family, all of Monsen. Mass: Pete Dumas of Braokfeld. Mass. and Mr. and Mrs. Joseph Dumas and family of this city
Putnam patriot., 1926-01-08
MISS ANTONIA DuHAMEL
 RETURNS MUCH IMPROVED

Miss Autoaia D1hamcl of Chanel street. formerly clerk n earrolie Drug store. has returned from tfe Peter Bent Brigham hospital of Bos
 Ion much improved, and her complete recovery Is < surcs in time. Miss bu. hame h-aib -en confined to her bed for ma .a weeks. unable To walk. sui frua from injuries ta her h1ek re
 aitHa from fall down stairs li ea feHHaI that she would never be
 6H HalH aa8la Her many frieu5s la. EIaI fa hear af her improvement
Putnam patriot., 1926-01-08
PLAN FACILITATES
 MERCHANDISE BUYING

omer Milot of Milot G Williams was in Boston Wednesday attending meeting of the Eastern Commission Company at Hotel Essex. The com pany comprises i25 stores in New England which combine in buying their stocks of merchandise thus get ting better prices. Milot < Williams is the only store in Putnam belonging to the organization Wednesdays meeting was 8 prosperous one, Rep resentafive lines were displayed and .a large amount of spring goods pur- chased This form of central nurchas- ing facilitates the work of the store buyer and affords wider range of selection. eliminating the trouble and inconvenience of buying individual small quantities
Putnam patriot., 1926-01-08

Rabbits in the high Cascade Noun tains have put on the snowshees for q hard winter. These creatures, call ed snowshoe rabbits, have long spread ing toes. which in winter are covered with coarse hair, giving the feet a graatar area
Putnam patriot., 1926-01-08

Three readers complained of error in our computation that Judas thirty pieces of silver, if placed at four per cent. would now equal mass of gold equal Co 345.000 globes the size of the earth. X professor of mathema- ties hes computed that t might equal 365 000 of uar worlds In l,90O years the sum would reach more than thirty million billion. billion. billion of dell rs Our statement. therefore was essentially correct.