Douglas daily dispatch., 1926-07-30

Can you picture nine Cor more) of
Douglas heftiest citizens cavorting
gaily about a ball diamond, putting
wheezily hither and yon ana making
mad lunges after the elusive pill?
Can you feature Fred Huxtable
chasing a high fly, or Daddy Pack
ard officiating at the plate?
Such may be the treat in store for
Douglas fans if the challenge issued
Thursday by Joe Tardy, on behalf of
the lean men of Douglas, is accepted
ball game, sponsored by the Kiwanis
club, at the Douglas ball park Sunday
for the benefit of the Blues.
The local club needs funds badly,
and though the recent tag day met
with generous response; not. enough
money was raised to see the club
through the remainder of the season.
Accordingly, at meeting of the XII
wants club Thursday, plans were form
ed to stage a benefit game between the
fat and the lean citizens of Douglas.
Joe Tardy appointed to pilot the
lean men, issues the following chal-
lenge and lineup:
whereas, the lean men of every
community are the real brains and or
ganizers of every movement, Douglas
being no exception; therefore, the lean
men of Douglas take the bull by the
horns and make the following PROPOSE
tion to the fat men of Douglas:
1--WE hereby challenge yo uto a game
of ball, to be played in the ball park
at Douglas, Sunday afternoon at 4
O'Clock, all proceeds to go to the funds
of the Douglas Blues, with the follow
ing rules to govern:
''The lean team must consist of lean
or skinny men only.
"The fat team is to consist of fat,
or 'tubby' men, only.
each team to be allowed a big
league allotment, namely, up to as
many as 16 men from whic hto draw
in case of accidents.
"The lean team shall pick one lean
umpire.
"The fat team shall pick one fat UNI
pire.
1.-TWO judges will decide whether a
man is lean or fat and eligible to play.
"The game is to be nine innings, pro-
many. If they can't, it may be short
ened by arrangement before the game.
'All lean players will pay general
admission, the same as the public, and
will demand that the fat players do
the same. (They won't if they can help
titD
"All players, lean or fat must take
an oath that they haven't played ball
for at least 10 years in order to be
eligible "My team, the leans, will con-
! sist of the following:
| Little Joe Hawley, former Giant
hurler.
John Crowell. the Lordsburg Cy-
clone.
Henry williams, who has the fade
away ball.
BILLY Meredith, who forgot more
baseball than most fat men know.
/ "Joe Sexton, the only first sacker who
can out@first-sack Chase.
"Cinco Nichols, who hurls an .awfu
washout pill.
George Jackson, who just took {
summer baseball course in England.
Dave O'Neill, of old Cactus league
fame.
.Sam Finley, of the same outfit
Frank Thompson, who throws tina
oily ball.
/ CDR Newcomer, who can extract
ball from the air, just like he gets
tooth.
Kelley Cansler, who helped Spauldinl
make his first baseball.
"Myrl Hartley, for whom they wrot
Casey at the Bat
MAX Pine, who will furnish the lean
with per cent.
"Joe Tardy, who once played in tn
bushes.
For our jumps, we pick 'Squareshoot
Pete Wimberley, and for the fats w
suggest Daddy Packard or Big Kelley
(Use your own judgment).
"I admit am presumptious in of
fering suggestions for the fat men
team, but having some inside dop