davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
New Britain herald., 1926-11-08
PRINCETON CRITICIZED
Harvarl Lampoon Comes Out With . Blast Against Tigers Football

Harvarl Lampoon Comes Out With a Blast Against Tigers Football
 Team.
 New York, Nov. R,-Princeton Alumni cheered by a IA to 0 vic- tory over the Crimson team Satur- day, today were unperturbed by sharp criticism of their Alma Mater in special issue of the Harvard ! Lampoon.
 The shafts of the semi i-monthly humorous publication were directed particularly at implied loose morals and drinking proclivities jocosely credited to the undergraduate body of the New Jersey University. Princetonians laid these remarks and references to possible renewal of an old quarrel over athletics as the outburst of minority at Cam bridge, citing a marked increase in friendliness on the part of the Harvard Crimson, the undergrad uate newspaper at Harvard, since strained athletic relations were patched up this fall with the help of Yale.
 A cartoon showing two mired hogs is underlined with Come Brother, Let Us Root for Dear Old Princeton," and there are occasion al references to chorus girls and Broadway.
New Britain herald., 1926-11-08

the public interested in real foot ball as distinguished from the other which in some cases this year has not been so good. A team which can engineer the forward pass eight times, resulting in scores. and which distinguished itself by much other brilliant playing, gives the lie to those carpers who seem to think nobody can really play football properly unless he donates his services to some institution which is in the game for the pure love of 1t -or for the pure love of the pelf without a division with the players.
 The day Is past when there is nothing to do in New Britain on
 Sunday afternoon" And we are just as law-abiding in every respect as we ever were, and just as many of us expect to get to heaven as formerly.
New Britain herald., 1926-11-08
CONNECTICUT'S SHARE IN
 NEW HIGHWAYS

Professor s. s. Stemberg, Of the University of Maryland, after having made an extended study of automo- bile and highway conditions, has announced his findings, which state highway departments and the gen. eral automobiling public will be vastly interested In. The Maryland professor tells us that the con- struction of highways is not keeping pace with the manufacture and use of automobiles, and that immense road work will be necessary to meet the demands Of the public within the next few years. In addition, he points out that 1t is self-evident that wider highways will be necessity, and that alternate routes must be built it traffic is to be properly accommodated and a mini- mum of accidents brought about.
 Those of us who have been try ing to get the state highway de- partment interested in these mod. ern requirements-at least in greater measure than pay-as-you-g road policy will permit-will be gratified at the Marylanders splendid analy- sis.
 Connecticut he mentions as one of the three Maryland and Pennsylvania being the others which are making a careful study of the causes of highoay accidents and are making an effort to build safety into the road rather than de- pend upon warning signs and de- vices alone in protecting the motor- ist. For this recognition The high way department will give much thanks.
 That the nation is rapidly ap- preaching the construction of super highways around congested areas Is apparent from what the professor says. These cannot be long delayed and a start has been made around some cities. As an instance of what is meant by the term, he refers to | the leading such highway con- structed so far, one leading out of Detroit. This road has total width of 2O4 feet, with two separated | roadways A feet wide, each carry ing one-way traffic. On each of the four track roadwsys horse-drawn | traffic is accommodated, keeping to
New Britain herald., 1926-11-08
MADE IN NEW BRITAIN

It Is a truisrn, If not a bromide, to say that goods made in New Britain are in use all over the world. But whe1 we tabulate such goods one invariably finds they are composed of the most utilitarian of utensils.
 There are exceptions, however. For instance, there are erector sets those unique playthings for chill dren which have become so popular within recent years and which are especially in demand as Christmas hears.
 Erector sets are being made in New Britain in large quantities, and by firm-Hart and Cooley-which is not primarily in business for this purpose. The erector sets form merely one of the specialties made by the firm.
 Buyers of such things for chill dren in all parts of the United States are confronted with the name of New Britain upon them, and in large colored type. It is a splendid advertisement for the city as well as for the firm.
 It is no exaggeration to say that nothing manufactured in the city gives more joy to the hundreds of thousands of children into whose playful hands these sets go. It is something made in New Britain that is a genuine joy-spreader. Everyone concerned should be very happy about it. And it is a pleasure to realize that one of Santa Gauss factories is right in our very midst.
New Britain herald., 1926-11-08

nice publicity which goes with play ing the major outfits. That's busi- ness.
 One would think that Johns Hop llins would be the university in that state to merit the big football ad- vertising. But Hopkins has never attained much greater distinction as a football university than the state institution. At present Hopkins, hav- ing returned to its original standing as strictly ultra- educational insti- tuition. Is even less inclined to per init sports to interfere with the study complex of its highbrow stu dent body. The state university, which has as it's object the promul- gation of education to native sons at a minimum cost, is getting all the football advertising and so far as it's greater rival Is concerned, it Is welcome to it.
 The game with Yale Saturday was entirely unsatisfactory to that part of the public which expected Yale to put up a good game and show a semblance of fighting spirit; not that Yale lost, but because 1t lost with it's second string men, It's chiet players being reported not in ideal condition for a game at this time.
 The public does not take kindly to an entire team being composed Of second string players during game of importance. It Is quite remark able that all of Yale's best players were deemed unfit to play in this game. Perhaps, after that Army game, their morale is shaken; per haps Tad Jones wishes to "save" the first stringers for the game with Princeton Saturday, and at the same time avoiding the possibility of more injuries.
 Or again, had the first stringers been used Saturday, and Maryland had won, the game this week with Princeton would be a farce.
New Britain herald., 1926-11-08
THE BOWI!

Although tickets to the football games at the Yale bowl are just as scarce this year as was the case last year, there seems to be less agitation apparent regarding the possibilities of enlarging the big sport arena. The knowledge seems pretty well disseminated that this couldn't be done except at prohibit tive cost and even if enlarged there is no guaPNtee that there would not be just az much disappointment about not getting sightseeing space therein as there is now.
 As things now stand, the 5000 lucky ones on the inside will re- main lucky while the 75O,oO0 on the outside will remain unlueky. That's the best Yale can do and the best the 75o,o0O can expect.
New Britain herald., 1926-11-08

Charles Diggle has returned from . hunting trip to Glastonbury. He
 shot IA quail while away and
 brought back seven Of them.
 Go to Knights for your photo. graphs. Car fare allowed. Plainville, Conn. formerly of New Britain. Wednesday evening at the Russ 1 win Lyceum. Mary Mannering in the ,, romantic Revolutionary play, Jan ice Meredith" E. L. Mercy won the prize at tho A. T. T. Whist club meeting last night.
 The social side |. of the fraternal
 organizations seems to be developing in New Britain this season. Whist club have lost their popularity, dwindled down to two or three, and
 been replaced by larger card parties. Business meetings are in- clined to be dry and do not bring out the members. but an entertain- ment of an appropriate character helps to relieve the monotony Of tho evening.
New Britain herald., 1926-11-08

A. The Great Dipper. also called Ursa Major. the Great Bear. Charles | Vain or David's Chariot is 8 con- stellation of seven bright stars which never sink below the horizon and are always visible on clear nights at any season. calendar date. or hour of the night. Tho constel- lation can be located by the fact that the dipper handle points up- ward and the four stars representing the dipper proper are at the bottom of the constellation. The pair of stars farthest from the handle are called the pointers because they point to the north star, Polaris.
 0. What is the name of the poem beginning "A garden is a love- some thing, God wot" and who is the author?
 A. The poem is My Garden" written by Thomas Edward Brown.
 o. Does Kansas or Iowa lead in the production of wheat?
 A. Kansas leads in the produc- tion of wheat, with North Dakota second and Nebraska third. Iowa leads in corn production.
 Q. Is concertina the same as an accordian?
 A. The concertina or melodian is a wind instrument with three reeds, and is one of the links in the evolu- tion of the mouth-organ. Inter- mediate links are the cheng and the accordian. The concertina is more highly developed instrument than the accordian. The accordian was invented in 1929 in Vienna. There are from five to fifty keys in the accordian. The concertina has two keyboards and a better tone.
 O. How is birdlime made? Is 1t used generally in the United States?
 A. Birdlime is viscid material obtained from the bark of holly and similar trees by boiling. It is used by European and Japanese birdsnarers for smearing twigs, but is rarely, if ever, employed in the United States.
 Q. How many games were played in the World Series, baseball in 1922 and 1923?
 A. In 1923 the Series ended with the sixth game, the New York Yankees defeating the New York Giants to 2. In 1929 five games were played, the New York Giants beating the New York Yankees 1 to l.
New Britain herald., 1926-11-08
Observation On The Weather

Forecast for Eastern New York: Probably rain Tuesday: not much change in temperature; moderate to fresh northeast and east winds.
 Forecast for Southern New Eng land: Cloudy tonight and Tuesday, probably rain Tuesday; not much change in temperature; moderate to fresh northeast and east winds.
 Forecast for New Haven and vi cinity: Unsettled weather tonight; probably followed by showers Tues day.
 Conditions Pressure is high over the middle Atlantic and New Eng land states also over the northern plains states and the Canadian northwest. A disturbance is over the southern plains states near Ok lahoma City, Okla. It Is producing rain in the central and lower Miss issippi valley and snow in portions Of the plains states. Much lower temperatures prevail in the Canad- ian northwest.
 Conditions favor for this vicinity: Unsettled weather with slightly low CT temperature.
New Britain herald., 1926-11-08
FOOTBALL ON SUNDAY

Clean. tnappy sport, large crowd of onlookers who at all times kept themselves within due bounds, marked the football game between All-New Britain and the Sub Base eleven. The victory Of the local team at Willow Brook park was gratify- ing, of course: but not more so than the fact such a game could be played in New Britain on Sunday afternoon without running into a jam with the constables.
 Once upon a time such a reason- able thing as a football game on Sunday was not allowed Those were the days when football-lil5e basebal-was regarded as too robust an amusement for the Sab bath day, even when played at a time when 1t would not interfere "ilH CildlCH ssTNlceS Ol any klNQ. We have progressed to the point, however. where that part of the pub lie which prefers an outdoor game to theater-eoing, concerts or auto mobiling, can actually follow its bent without suffering condign punishment.
 The game under discussion was won by playing fine football. That is what the public wants, and has a right to expect. The fact that the two isa,ns were composed of "pro- fesssenar' players had no Sffect upon
New Britain herald., 1926-11-08

like a lizard, feet like a crabs claws and snake for tail sat on my chest. Its eyes were full of circular stripes, and every time it stuck out its tongue, the stripes in It's eyes went around and bell rang What on earth do you make Of that?
 Albert McAdam Dear Mir. McAdam:
 The dream shows that you should beware of a man carrying satchel that tinkles when it is set down. If he gives you bottle of something, put your finger in it. If the nail comes off, don't drink more than a quart at one sitting.
 
 Send your dreams to Prof. I c. lit to be interpreted!
 Copyright, 1926, Reproduction
 Forbidden)
New Britain herald., 1926-11-08
HOUSEWIVES ALLOWANCES


 Minnesota has been heard from in new role. According to the law in that state-a law not radically dis similar from the law in other states-a husband is not required to pay his wife an allowance.
 In other words, the woman who, if there Is no servant. prepares the meals, washes the dishes, keeps the house tidy, sews on buttons and keeps herself busy from morn till night, is not entitled to a cent If the beneficent head of the establish ment wishes to run his place &C., cording to the letter of the law.
 The only point against the hus- band-or in his favor-is that he must support his wife suitable to their station in life." While doing so the lordly husband can hold on to
 
 all the money and not let his superior half see a cent of it, If he is so in clined.
 Such law, wherever 1t exists, needs emandation or amending. A wife is entitled to an allowance upon which to run her part of the estab- lishment. The husband who doesn't tender his wife an allowance to fit her duties and her needs is not treat ing her as we'll as he would a serv- ant, whom he would have to pay for a service never as satisfactory as the sort the average wife is glad to give.
New Britain herald., 1926-11-08

the righ hand curb: while slow moving heavy trucks are outside of them, and automobiles in the two other lanes. The whole provides rapid, safe and easy movement for all kinds of traffic. Tn addition. there is space between the roadways for trolley lines, and provisions made for motor parking, as well as for pedestrians. Such a highway meets every requirement of present day needs. The cost no doubt is enormous, and they can only be constructed where traffic density justifies the cost. But that they are coming scarcely anyone need deny.
 Extensive widening programs, or parallel routes, are being constructed on the Pacific highway in Washing ton state; highways leading from Chicago; the Lincoln highway west of Philadelphia; and the Boston Post Road between New York and New Haven. This latter road has been receiving enormous attention by the Connecticut highway depart ment, leading to criticisms of neg lect of some other sections of the state.
 It is satisfying that Connecticut is included among the states held up as attempting to meet the press- ing needs along the highways; but if most of the other states are do- ing less In this direction than Con- necticut the advance must be slow indeed.
New Britain herald., 1926-11-08

You can get an answer to an. question of fact or information b, writing to the Question Editor New Britain Herald, Washington Bureau, 1922 New York avenue Washington. D. C., enclosing twt cents in stamps for reply. Medical legal and marital advice cannot b, given, nor can extended researcl be undertaken. All other question: vii receive personal reply. Un signed requests cannot be answered All letters are Editor @. What are the nicknames O the football teams in some of tn, Southern Universities?
 A. Washington and Lee Uni versity, "The Generals;" Universit, of Virginia, "The Cavaliers Will liam and Mary. 'The Little Indians.
 Q. What is the address of thu Esperanto Association of Nortf America?
 A. 5o7 Pierce Building, Copei, Square, Boston, Massachusetts.
 Q. What part did Malcolm Nc Gregor play in "The Gay Deceiver? ? In what other recent pictures has he appeared?
 A. He played Robert" in "The Gay Deceiver." Other recent pic. lures of his are "It Must me Love featuring Colleen Moore; and Dor Juan's Three Nights' with Lewis Stone.
 Q. What is solid gold?
 A. Solid Cola is the term used commercially to distinguish articles made of gold alloys from plated gold It does not mean pure gold and ma. refer to 10-karat gold or to gold ol more or less fineness.
 c. Is there King in Holland?
 A. Queen Wilhelmina is the pres. ent ruler of Holland. In February 1901 she married Henry, Duke o1 Meckleburg-Schwerin, who took the title of Prince Consort. He could not be King because he was not de- scended in the royal line of success sion of the Netherlands.
 Q. Who was Isaac Watts?
 A. An English independent cler. gylnan and hymn writer.
 c, Are registered and trained nurses the same?
 A. A registered nurse is one who has graduated from an accredited nurses training school and who has successfully passed the examination of a State Board of Nurses Exami. ners. A trained nurse may or ma, not have completed her training course and may or may not be reg. istered. She must, however, have had some training to deserve the title.
 c. What Is the difference be. tween "Classicar' and "Mediacval' Latin?
 A. Classical Latin is a dead Ian. guage not spoken today. Mediaeva Latin is much simpler and is some. times spoken by scholars. It i. used in the litany of the Roman Catholic church.
 Q. Is a postage stamp tax?
 A. It is not tax but a charge for service rendered.
 o. When did the Galveston Texas, flood occur?
 A. September s, 1900.
 Q. Will you describe the Great Dipper?
New Britain herald., 1926-11-08
CASTLES IN THE AIR
Of Little Willle's Wish Came True
 pv f1osottov Nelthronn

(1f Little Willle'S Wish Came True!) By Dorothy Nelthropp Little Wiiiie-Weil, I guess l won't so to school today, mother. My, your ears are dirty! Come here!
 His Mother--But I just washed them. Wilhes
 Little Willia-Well, you did poor job! COME HERE. Bring me the soap shd the wsshrag! Stop that squirming. Hush, now, or I'll slap you!
 His Mother--Csln I go out and play how?
 Little Wilie---No. You can't play with hat rough lady next door! She isn't pit nicel If you want some- thing to do you can sit in that chair and read your cookbook! Is your husband home yet?
 Ills Mother--There he comes now.
 Hs F'ather-~Hello, folks!
 l. lie Willie--Let me see your han ,s, papa, Gracious! They're filtl y. Go right in and wash them, at lnce! Did you bring me the car 5v I asked for? What! You DIDN'T. BRING ME THAT RAZOR STRAP!
New Britain herald., 1926-11-08

Aimee Semple McPherson, evangelist. spoke on 'The Greatest Liar" attracting thousands to her temple. She picked out the devil for the appellation, however, but that alert individual seems to have been caught entirely unawares.
New Britain herald., 1926-11-08

With winter soon due, there is a shortage of coal in Europe. It Is to be hoped the winter will not be what is known in Vermont as hard" one.
New Britain herald., 1926-11-08
FOOTBALL ADVERTISING

During the past few years the University of Maryland has gone in for football advertising: a good coach was employed and a passable team developed. Then began the hunt for some big game and all the
New Britain herald., 1926-11-08

Now a typhoon in the Philippines, accompanied by tidal wave that drowned It's hundreds. Often as 1t happens the human race will never get used to this sort of thing.
New Britain herald., 1926-11-08

Member Audit Bureau of Circulation. The A B. O. 10 . national organization which furnishes newspapers and advsr. tieers with . strictly honeN analysis or circulation. Our circulation etatist,ee sS h..ea mon this audit This insures esn+er4,on arain,. fraud in newspaper 1istribution fieu, 4s to both national and local advertisers.
New Britain herald., 1926-11-08

Member of the Associated Press. Tho Associated Pvees h exclusively sn. titlsA to the uss for republication oi all news credited to n or not otherwifs credited in this paper and also local nSws published thersin.
New Britain herald., 1926-11-08

With the traffic situation in Forestville being described as "acute," one notes that another small town has become metropolitan.
New Britain herald., 1926-11-08

TONSILLY
 By George T. Russell The doctor thinks ought to have My tonsils taken out, They aren't what they used to be- He's right. beyond a doubt. And yet-and yet-pray, friends, do
 not
 These sentiments condemn They've been attached to me so long I've grown attached to them!
New Britain herald., 1926-11-08
TELEPHONE cALS Businsss Oflcs .... SzS Editorial Roemo .... Ss6

The only profitable advertising medium ,~ the City. Circulation beoks and prsss resnu aiWeys open to advsrtieera.
New Britain herald., 1926-11-08

It isn't probable that any man ever wrote love story after forty without thinking himself an ass.
New Britain herald., 1926-11-08

There can be no doubt that the plan for a municipal parking space will be popular-with those who do the parking.
New Britain herald., 1926-11-08

What is more gratifying than sunny Sunday afternoon in Novem- Der after the four previous Sun days were rainy?
New Britain herald., 1926-11-08
Disappointing

Disappointing Rev Harrison: "Rastus, what did yo' git in de collection plate dis mawnin'?"
 Rastus (treasurer): "Jes' bout de usual amount"
 Rev. Harrison: "Jes' bout de usual amount, yo' say? Why, de deacon done tol me we got a dia- mon pin" RastAs: "Yo' is mistooken, sah. It was a dime an pin"
 Everett Dyrutt
New Britain herald., 1926-11-08

A cosmopolitan is one who real izes that table manners are a local ism.
New Britain herald., 1926-11-08
Ix91.: aa%%{A4q2b MAxsoN EMMaH Nu0
Send all communications to Fun Shop Ellt0e, care Of the New
 Britain Herald, and your letter will be forwarded to New York.
They've Tried Everything Else,
Ma,.soFE FEuxnAu Jtunz

They've Tried EVerytnIng ElseI If every delegate would swear Each day to read the Fun Shops
 jokes,
 They'd soon stop wrangling over | there, "The League" would start function ing, Folks!
New Britain herald., 1926-11-08

Roger Wolfe Kahn's new place in New York sports mirror for dance floor. Why a mirror for such a purpose?
New Britain herald., 1926-11-08

The white mans chief burden are sorry whites who give him bad reputation in alien lands.
New Britain herald., 1926-11-08

The Herald is on sale daily In New York at Hotalings Newsstand. Times eouars; schultz's Newsstands Entrance Grand Central, 43nd Street.
New Britain herald., 1926-11-08

Funny world! When one gangAter kills another, there's no medal for distinguished service.
New Britain herald., 1926-11-08

There are numerous preparations to take the hurt out of burn, but so few of them are suitable as chasers.
New Britain herald., 1926-11-08

The more one contemplates the world, the better one understands why newborn infants are red in the face.
New Britain herald., 1926-11-08

For that matter, political party can't endure half wet and half dry.
New Britain herald., 1926-11-08

You'd like to call on your super iors? We'll. that's yhat animates the bores who call on you. Cheer up.
New Britain herald., 1926-11-08
From Our Own Infantry

From Our Own Infantry
 Irin Regulations! Phyllis, five years old. was given a piece Of marble cake. After holdnie 1t in her hand and looking doubtfully at 1t for some minutes, she remarked, Mother, shall I eat 1t? Are there REALLY marbles in it?p
 Mrs. w. E. Haley
New Britain herald., 1926-11-08
Her One Fault

Her One Fault New Cook: What do you mean by coming in here and kissing me! I don't know you."
 Policeman: Be yourself. lady! Ignorance of the law Is no excuse!
 Paul Cantelmo.
New Britain herald., 1926-11-08

A bad cold is much like wife. It never kills you unless you neglect 1t.
New Britain herald., 1926-11-08

Thanksgiving dinners will be cheaper this year. Is the forecast; bad news for "reducers."
New Britain herald., 1926-11-08
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