The Monmouth inquirer., 1926-05-27
The Hello
Girls Story

Twas telephone girl calculating
it-a telephone girl In one OF the
main hotel Hobbies.
The Indictment was so overwhelm-
ing that she was asked to elucidate
Whereupon she deity picked her
hunk of gum from one of the unused
switch pegs, inserted 1t into the wait
ing orifce, and prattled right ahead
ooh, the outrageous lies they
phone to their wives to excuse their
not being home as they ought to bel"
said she. looking, however, not quite
so Mortified as might have been ex-
pected. land their deliberate. callous,
cold-blooded, foxy way Of lying, too
o-o-oh!"
Detailed counts of this allegation
were called for.
"Oh, we'll" said the telephone girl.
"you ought to hear 'em, that's all.
Two of EN- that came in here about
Z O'Clock last evening were samples
samples OF the limit. They we're men
around thirty, and both OF them were
what men folks call happy-soused.
They strolled in here, arm in arm,
sort of leaning on each other. They
weren't so happy-soused that they had
lost their foxiness, though; men new
er become so far gone as to lose their
cagyness, in my opinion.
"Well. whatcha going to hand her,
matey? the lean man asked the fat
one.
".sear.4 me, said the fat one.
pushing back his hat and scratching
his head. Gotta pull some new stuff.
She's jerry to all of the old comedy.
"sOld boyhood pal Of yours just
breezed in from Minneapolis and
you've got to take him around sug
gested the lean man, gFipning.
LAW. nav, nothin like that saif
the fat one disgustedly. That's al
almanac A. D. 1887 number Nix
Gotta spring something nev an
neat
"Man that you've got a big de-
on with breezed along and -dragge'
you of to dinner?' suggested the ieal
one again.
Say, tin those lumpy ones
wheezed the fat man, I've tried L
ease her that one fifty times and ney-
er got it over yet
"Gotta run over to Baltimore to
fix up hurry business gag?
'Nothin' resembling It,
"Friend Of yours took you over
to Anacostia to look at a bungalow
site?'
@rried that last summer and got
tne boots
"Man Interested in model tene-
ments kept you downtown to show
you a lot OF model tenement blue
prints?'
Say, how old dye think my wife
is bout six? She'd want to see the
blue prints. believe me-
"'Your boss took you out in his
new motor car and the machine
broke down in Bladensburg. and you'll
be home as soon as repairs are nader
"'Fliv, too
"Went to the hospital to see an
old side-kicker that's dying of-er-
housemaid's knee or something?
Not chance
Fellow bet you you couldn't walk
to Great Falls and back. and you took
him up?'
"Million to one shot
oman in your office took sick from
eating soft shell crabs a. lunch and
you had to take him to bis home over
near Laurel MIDI
"'That likewise is 1iimz.
'Then the lean one grinned in a
puzzled sort of way and looked
around kind Of hopelessly.
"fGee, he said to the fat one,
| you've slipped her most of the roper
toire, haven't you. pair
90 Fraid I have, replied the fat
man gloomily. But say, if we're go
ing to that doll burlesque show, it's
time to eat, and I've gotta pass her
some old thing. Let's see, and he
pushed his hat up from one side and
scratched above his ear Gosh, I've
got it! I'll blame 1t all on you, seer
| I'll tell her that your wife's out OF
town and that when met you on my
way home you were picked up to the
necktie, and that I had. Of course, 70
take care of you, and
Ice that, ice that said the lean
one, grabbing his fat friend by the
coat lapel Put that in storage be-
fore you pull 1t and get me in Dutch
err than am already. Why. you big
lummox. doesn't your spouse hate me
enough already without your piling up
this new stdff? How dye know but
what my wife has spent the hull after
noon with your wife, anyhow? Don't
you know that the minute you tell her
that we're together, why, your wifeIl
call up my wife, and they'll get to
comparing notes, and they'll both
swear it's a frame-up and all that?
Say cut out these Bwana Tumbo get