The Carbon County news. [volume] (Red Lodge, Mont.) 1924-1931, 1926-01-21
A TRAGEDY It
POULTRY SHOW
(By E. P. Conwell)

morning and drank considerably more
than was good for him. He left his
room in the Meitier building in high
spirits and proceeded 10 make the
rounds of the coops and crates crack
ing suggestive jokes and finally going
so far as to insult Cochen pullet
which proved to be his undoing.
Hello, you old hen" he said to a
fine Plymouth matron who has designs
on the blue ribbon, "you Plymouth
Rocks haven't much to back you up
except your conceit and your boast
that your ancestors came over in the
Mayfower. Now, listen, you old
cracked voiced cackler, Columbus dis
covered America but he doesn't own
it. Get that?" Stopping in front of
a Rhode Island Red coop he poured
out invective something awful. "You
are pretty bunch of clam eaters, but
you are about as small in my estima-
ton as the state you came from. You
preen around here in Red Lodge where
you aren't known and one would think
the way you act that the state of
Rhode Island was named after you
"You Leghorns are we'll named, he
exclaimed, "How many blue ribbons
do you think you will draw down? If
this was leg show they would have
to run an extra baggage car to carry
out the trophies that would be hung on
you birds but it isn't. This is fancy
poultry show and I'm the chief attrac-
ton. My. wife and two daughters are
still asleep down there in their coop,
dreaming of winning a whole train
load of ribbons; every one of which
is azure blue"
"And here's the Bantams. Oh! you
little mites of nothing at all. If l
would pull two feathers out of you
there would be nothing left but a
squeak and at that you would have
to boiler twice before you would make
noise. A louise would starve to
death if he had to live on any one of
you"
At that moment his eye fell upon a
coop of rabbits and guinea pigs and
I,o oooIv1oJ oIo,,d aPi~,o po,,Ifry +b "a ~
he exclaimed, pointing to couple of
young guinea pigs that were born the
night before, "fne feathered birds
those, he said "and great layers too"
but he moved on when the father pig
showed his crop of fine teeth.
Cant something be done with that
inebriate" exclaimed a Chinese Pleas
and who was taking in the show, cover
in my country he would had his head
chopped off before this for such con-
duct" "This is a dry country" ans
wered a duck across the aisle who is
noted for his wit "That rooster will
probably attract so much favorable
attention here today that he will draw
down the sweepstake blue ribbon"
"But, he'll break up the show, "
screamed a dry land goose. "Why do
people use it when they have so much
water which they claim is 1916 pure?"
"Say," exclaimed B. Orphington turn
ing and pointing a wing at him,
"You'r well named. Anyone who would
call you anything but goose would
be arrested for SANDER. Don't you
know that water was made to swim
in and battle in. Don't you know that
it causes rust and floods and panics in
the Stock Market when they feed too
much of it to the capital stock? Why
you long necked monstrocity, if blue
ribbons were awarded in this show
for the most perfect vacuum you
would be smothered to death with the
avalanche of them that would fall on
your head
"Why do respectable fowls have to
put up with this disgraceful conduct ?"
said prim young pullet stretching
her neck out of her coop. "I'm a
daughter Of Buff Cochin and can say
that I was raised by poor but honest
parents. | can just stand anything
except nasty, sarcastic language and,
take it from me, hate hooch and will
never hook up with bird that uses
it." That speech certainly ruffed
the feathers of B. Orphington for he
was nothing if not ladies man. He
went over and stood in front of her
cage and sought to wither her with his