davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
New Britain herald., 1926-12-21

all he can say by considerable de- tail. Some of his best ammunition, he hints, is left in reserve. If what he has enunciated doesn't bring re- suits" he will shoot some more, per haps after the Christmas holidays.
 When he brings in the mysterious death of Jesse Smith, onetime aid of Daugherty, and alleged evidence giv- en in a court in Alabama but hereto fore suppressed in Washington, and such things, he whets the public ap- petite. He may do nothing more, but as everybody knows, there is mystery in the world, and Mir. lief lin may be some kind Of a Sherlock Holmes after all. At any rate. he is on his feet, unafraid and un- ashamed. and the guilty and uneasy of conscience may well be alarmed.
 What will help to dissipate the Heflin charges is the natural as- sumption that people cannot possibly be so extraordinarily rotten in morals and character as to have done the things Heflin charges; es- pecially men who stood high in the nations esteem for awhile. When he adds a hint of murder to his list of outrages the stage setting is near ly too much for the eye and over towering to the intellect. Still. such things are possible; it is up to Sen ator Heflin to lend his aid a little further before We take all this seri- ously. We have no doubt that, with his fiery and ready tongue beating a merry tattoo to his boiling thoughts. he will be able to entertain the boys for quite a while.
 If there is the possibility of any truth in what he says, however, it should be vigorously investigated in the customary manner. The Demo- crats have nothing to lose, anyway, a fact which Senator Hcflin fully realizes.
New Britain herald., 1926-12-21

in reality should not devolye upon the governor of state. Governor Smiths average, including the clem- ency record of two months in 1925 and eleven months in 1926, has been seven cases a week. It is remarkable that the governor of a state can find sufficient time to study so many crime cases weekly in addition to other multifarious duties. The possi- bility is that many of the cases are never studed, but are of political nature. That is one of the worst governors.
New Britain herald., 1926-12-21

The other viewpoint is that a senator is not only primarily 8 sena- tor from one state, but his vote in the Senate helps to make laws bind ing upon 47 other states than his own. If he has been improperly elected or appointed he violates the rights of the 47 other states who are bound by the laws he helps to frame.
 In addition to this the Constitu- tion clearly gives to the Senate the right to be the sole judge of it's membership.
 Either Senator Bingham regards his idea Of states rights as more binding than this section of the Con- stitution, or perhaps he mistakes the section for the 18th amendment.
 Connecticut has as deep an inter- est as any of the other 47 states as to whether Senator Frank L. Smith, beneficiary of Sam Insults money, should be permitted to enter the Senate. Once a member Of the Sen- ate he would have a hand in making laws under which Connecticut and the other 47 states besides his own would have to abide. There surely is a states right about this matter the right to have federal laws bind ing the state only passed by 100 per cent properly elected senators.
New Britain herald., 1926-12-21
SEEING IS RELIEVING

When Mayor Weld, himself in person." found it necessary to turn into a traffic officer in the down. town section when he saw automo- bile drivers were ignoring the fire alarm signal it must be accepted as positive proof that there is an enor- nous amount of carelessness run ming rampant on rubber tires.
 As the mayor indignantly pointed out, how are fire trucks to get through the mazes of moving traf- fife? And how are automobiles block ing traffic to get out of the way of rapidly moving fire trucks if they do not duck to one side ahead of time and remain motionless until the jug gernauts have passed?
 The mayor declared also that there would be a very bad smashup some nice day if motorists did not learn their A B C's to better effect. Oth- CTS have said substantially the same thing long before this. Now that the mayor has had an opportunity to see one of the little things that bother the fire department every time it scoots from the respective nests it might be well for him to start a movement for more rigid regulations and likewise pull the strings to have them enforced to the letter.
New Britain herald., 1926-12-21
TOO MUCH CLENENCN BY GOVERNOR SMITH

The Republican party in New York state has a good chance to make a slight impression upon the popularity of Governor Smith in con- nection with it's claim buttressed by official figures. that the governor has been one of the most lenient in the nation toward convicts. It is shown that he extended more elem ency during the last five years than the three previous governors con- bined.
 Executive clemency is no way to fight the crime wave; and in New York q stern fight. rather than a soft heart, is necessary.
 Ma" Ferguson of Texas, when she was governor. was much criticised for her habit of opening the doors of the states. penitentaries so that IiA' NuLbI4l Otlt' anu pItiii'ltl tIS tOulI go forth free men. Much of her un- popularity hinged upon her record as a prison-o opener. Among the states where she was roundly crii- cised was New York.
 There is no reason to regard Gov ernor smith by another yardstick if he has indulged in a wholesale par doning saturnalia since being in of flee. There may be some criminals incarCeratcd in New York who arc entitled 10 clcmency but they must be very few.
 Such responsibility, or privileges,
New Britain herald., 1926-12-21

Harry: "Oh, knew her when heI garters were still invisible"
 Mrs. H. T. Behrens
 Time Drags On Tess: How long did their court ship last?"
 Jean: Through three permanent waves"
 Violet Gauser
 Ages Ago Bruce: You say your acquain- tance with Marie goes far back?" Larkil: "Oh, yes: 1t dates back to the time when her fingers with which she holds cigarettes were still white"
 Theodore Wrightstone
 Or Unshot Brown: Did you know Grace years ago?"
 Robinson: Did I know her, you ask? Man, I was on familiar terms with her when the fur coat she's wearing was still running around the woods untrapped."
 Jean Benda Copyright, 1926, Reproduction
 Forbidden)
New Britain herald., 1926-12-21
\ NEW SCANDAL IS UNCOVERED

The worst sinkhole of iniquity in the governments history" is Senator Borah's description of the waste of alien property funds while under the jurisdiction of the various ''custo- dians' appointed by honest and painstaking administrations.
 The Hist of iniquities" as made public by the Associated Press. based upon an inspection of the findings of Comptroller General McCarl by the New York World. is quite enough to convince even the most nonchalant and apathetic of citizens that a rec ord of violated laws. huge and in- Hated fees and commissions, padded expense accounts. laxity and irregu- larity in hundreds of cases, is noth- ing 10 be proud of
 The regimes of A. Mitchell Palmer --ono- time Quaker lawyer in Phila elphia-Francis r. Garvan and T.. w. Miller are surveyed in the report and it is to be hoped in the interest of honesty and an unspotted page that Comptroller General McCarl has made huge mistake himself in coming to his conclusions. Of this, however, there is slight probability. Nearly everyone with even a medi- ocre development of common sense might have known that when mil lions of dollars in property came un- der the jurisdiction of gentlemen who did not know how to handle that much without making terrible errors, some kind of scandal would eventuate.
 The comptroller general and his staff spent year delving into the multitude of dubious accounts. The report he had made ranges from the s7,000,000 American Metal case to small duplicated per diem allow ances. It is about as complete as any report ever made, and has been placed in the hands of President Coolidge.
 Senator Norris, irked over the de- lay shown by the President in pre- senting the report to Congress, where it belongs, is beginning to ask pertinent questions. like the in surgents naturally are wont to do.
 If there has been any attempt to bury or pigeon-hole the report it is now too late. The A. P. serves too many papers for that The President may as well hand in the report to Congress for action by the Senate Investigating committee, of which Senator Borah is chairman. Senator Borah and his colleagues will put the finishing touches upon the scandal
New Britain herald., 1926-12-21
THE. DOCTOR

Class Conducted by Arnold Kit
 tredge
 Class: "Tell Us, please. dearest. teacher, what on earth is a doctor 2" Teacher: The doctor is man who puts the wrong end of tea spoon down your throat and makes you say An"
 Class: "Why does he do it?"
 Teacher: "To see what kind of medicine will taste worst"
 Class: There ought to be a law against it.
 Teacher: There ought, indeed. But the reason he does it is to make you well, so you won't have to stay out of school"
 Class: "Oh, then it's all right. Does he get paid for it?"
 Teacher: Not for a long time, usually. The doctor bill is something people always intend to pay next month"
 Class: "When is a doctor called 2" Teacher: When anybody's in dan ger from disease or injury. You can always tell they're out of danger when the doctor quits calling"
 Class: That sounds like a dirty crack. Are there different kinds of doctors?"
 Teacher: "Oh, yes. There is the specialist, for example. The special ist is all dated up in advance and you've got 10 give him two weeks notice if you intend to be sick.'
 Class: And what other kinds"
 Teacher: Then there is the coun- try doctor, who goes to bed tired at 1 a. m.. and gets up again at 2:30 a. m., to drive 10 miles over a mud dy road because somebody absent mindedly ate tripe and mincc pic before going to bed
 Class: And does the doctor ever make T mistakc"' "'
 Teacher: It's hard to tell. 1T he does, it's always covered mp. Good bye, now, and come again when you're tired of playing
New Britain herald., 1926-12-21
TRAGEDY DESPITE CHRISTMAS CHEER

The glad Christmas season is be- fore us; hearts are light and spirits gay. Yet the news of the day re- mains about the same-the weird, the uncanny. the astonishing, the tragic in about equal proportions. Yesterday, however, as if to remind us that all is not joy at Christmas time, the tragic had more than its share of front page space.
 What Christmas is in store for the families of the 30 or more men in New York who were the victims of mad prank of ice floes as they were floating to their place of en- ployment in a puny launch? One moment so much satisfaction and joy that some of the men were sing ing; the next moment struggle for life in icy waters There will be charges that the launch was over
 
 loaded, no doubt; post mortem at tempts to fix the blame; laws limit ing the number allowed upon such craft may be enforced for awhile But the men are gone from this life and their families are left to weep and wonder at this awful twist of fate as Christmas hears. Others will share their wonder and sympa- thetic hands will no doubt extend more aid than at any other time of the year. What can be more sorrow full than youngster. dreaming of kind and good Santa, being informed that his daddy is dead in the morgue?
 Then that story of an old fisher man who, adrift 1 days in an open boat, subsisted by eating the raw flesh of his dead companion. Final ly, on reaching an island, he crawled ashore prepared to die of exhaustion, only to have his flickering life wooed back by the kind ministra- tions of other fishermen who found his hunched-up form lying on the shore. Was there ever a more grew some story invented by the minds of fiction masters? And this terrible story of the men who go upon the sea in ships is brought to us just at the moment when minds are cen- tered upon the annual time of joy and glory on high. We can only trust that the old fisherman is brought to sufficiently by Christ mas to enjoy his extra victuals along with the rest, and that he may for get, if he can, the terror of those II days upon the threatening and heav- ing breasts of angered Neptune.
New Britain herald., 1926-12-21

You can get an answ-r to any question of fact or information by writing to the Question Editor, New Britain Herald. Washington Bureau, 1922 New York avenue, Washington, D. C., enclosing two cents in stamps for reply. Medical, legal and marital advice cannot be given, nor can extended research be undertaken. All other questions will receive a personal reply. Un- signed requests cannot be answered. All letters are confidential
 Q. What does Oklahoma mean and what is the state flower and motto?
 A. Oklahoma is an Indian word meaning "beautiful land" or "red people," The state flour is mistlc- toe and the motto is Labor omnia vincit' Gabor conquers all things).
 Q. Why do Americans stand during the rendering of "The Star Spangled Banner" and not for America or America the Beau tiful"o
 A. The Star Spangled Banner Is recommended for universal recog- milton as the National Anthem and is so considered, although it has never been legally designated. The other songs. while they are patriotic, are not considered national anthems and therefore Americans do not pay them the same tribute as in the case of the Star Spangled Banner
 Q. Why is it ,inwise to keep goldfish in an ordinary round fish bowl?
 A. Because the narrow neck and the small amount of surface area does not allow enough air to be absorbed to satisfy the fish. An other objectionable feature of the globe is the reflection and refraction of light rays, which tends to make the fish nervous and uneasy. An aquarium with straight sides is the only suitable form. It should be rectangle and equal in width at the top and bottom.
 O. Do children born in the United States of alien parents have right to vote when they reach the age of 21, regardless of whether their parents have been naturalized ?
 A. All children born in the United States are American citizens and can vote if otherwise qualified under the laws of the state in which they reside. Only children born of parents engaged in the diplomatic service of another country accredt- ed to and temporarily residing in the United States are not citizens of the United States.
 Q. Was Christopher Columbus the first white man to set foot on American soilo Can you give me the principal events along the line of settlement, government and gen. eral advancement of America since its discovery?
 A. Jeff. son of Eric the Red, was probably the first white man to set foot in America. He touched Labrador in 10o1 and is believed to
New Britain herald., 1926-12-21
SENATOR HEFLIN'S FIERY RAMPAGE,

Senator Heflin's charges are inter- csting, but he ought to be sufficient of senator, with the senatorial mind uppermost. to realize it is eX- tremely hard to prove such aSscr- tions. He is in the happy position, however, of not being compelled 10 prove anything he says. as sen- ator's words in the Senate are privileged" and not amenable to the law Of libel or scandal; or to writs of various and divers kinds
 The gentleman from Alabama, however, is a courageous and vitriol ic fighter, and says he hasn't said
New Britain herald., 1926-12-21

have spent the winter south of Bos- ton, Massachusetts. Christopher Columbus landed at the Bahama Islands in 14s2. 491 years after Jeff Ericsson. A bulletin Columbus to Coolidge" obtainable from our Washington Bureau for five cents will give you the outline of the prin- cipal events you desire. The ma- terial is too long to be included in this column.
 Q. Can civilians take an exami- nation for a commission as second lieutenant in the army? To whom should application be made?
 A. Yes. Complete information may be obtained from the adjutant general, war department, Washing ton, D. c.
 Q. How can a woolen sweater be washed so that it will not become hard and shrink?
 A. Use soft tepid water Make suds with mild soap. Never rub soap on the wool as that makes it harsh. Squeeze and knead the wool in the suds. Do not rub. Rinse in two tubs of clean water of the same temperature as the suds. Change of temperature of the water will cause the fibers to contract and shrink the fabric In drying lay on a clean sheet and pin to original shape and size.
 
 Q. When and how was Princeton University founded? Who was its president?
 A. It was founded in 1746 as the College of New Jersey. Its in ception was due to the need felt by members of the Presbyterian church for more comprehensive school to take the place of the Log College es- tablished in 1726 by William Ten nant in Bucks county, Pennsylvania. The first move toward it's establish ment was begun In 1739 by the Synod of Philadelphia, but the plan fell through and in 1746 a charter was finally obtained independently by members of the Synod of New York. The college was opened at Elizabethtown with Jonathan Dick inson as president. On his death in 1747 Aaron Burr became president.
 Q. What two cities in Canada have the largest population?
 A. Montreal with population of 61S,5o6 is the largest and Toronto with population of 521,S93 is second
 Q. Can you give me a recipe for venison steak with chestnut sauce?
 A. Wipe the steak, sprinkle with salt and pepper, place on a greased broiler and broil five minutes; re- move 10 hot platter and pour over chestnut sauce made by frying 1-2 onion and 6 slices of carrot. cut in small pieces in tablespoons of but ter for 5 minutes, adding 3 table spoons flour and stir until Drowned. Then add 1 1-2 cups brown stock, sprig parsley bay leaf, 8 pepper corns. 1 teaspoon salt and let sim mer for 20 minutes. Strain and add 1 cup boiled French chestnuts diced and 1 tablespoon butter.
 Q. Would an airplane going 30 miles an hour stop immediately when it hits an endless belt going 30 miles an hour in the opposite direction? If not how far would it go before stopping"
 A. It would not stop. but the distance it would travel. depends upon so many factors that a definite answer cannot be given. If land ing was made upon a belt travelling in the opposite direction it would lessen the distance of travel before stopping but in no case would it re- duce it to zero.
 Q. On what date did President Wilson sign the Nolstead Act?
 A. He did not sign it. He vetoed it on October 27. 1919 and congress immediately passed it over his veto.
New Britain herald., 1926-12-21
NEVER WAS PRODUCED But Barrie Really Did Write Sequel
 tO Peter Pan

London. Dec. 21 LPp-That J. N. Barrie once constructed. although he did not publish. sequel to Peter Pan has been revealed by Hilda Ire velyan. the original Wendy, Tho sequel was called 'an afterthought, or what happened 10 Wendy."
 There wal only one performance: Barrie was the sole actor and Miss Trevelyan the sole audience. and the stage was a room in the authors home.
 Wendy married one of tho lost boys and wore a white dress ard pink sash at the wedding; they hal a daughter named Jane. The oth F boys, however, did not fit into t'e new play happily.
 The audience did not entirely ap- rove of the way the play worked ort: nor did Barrie himself, and the id :. was abandoned.
New Britain herald., 1926-12-21

Winter scene: Ten below zero. Twin beds. Just one occupied. Funny world! To require fitness in doctors, lawyers, etc., and do nothing about parents.
 It is mistake, however 10 as sume that Europe has q monopoly of people who know how to dodge debt.
 Another thing that makes food cost more is the fact that it's more fun to choose from a menu than to cook
 Correct this sentence: And when we're married said she, well all ways be polite to one another as we arc now"
 Copyright 1926, Publishers, Syndi-
 cate.)
New Britain herald., 1926-12-21

Member Audit Bureau of Circulation. The 4. B. c. is national organization which furnishes newspapers and adver- tisers with . strictly honest analyeis of circulation. Our circulation statistics are based upon thie audit. Th'e ineures protection asain~. fraud in newspaper distribution figu e to both national and local advertisers.
New Britain herald., 1926-12-21
Send all communications. 10 Fun Shop Editor, care Of the New Britain Herald and your letter will he forwarded 10 NeN York
That Personal Touch." Folks!

It's the personal touch" counts in shopping, they say, Well, we know they're right, for if we had some way Of collecting the personal touches" friends made We'd come out this Christmas with all our bills paid.
New Britain herald., 1926-12-21

Lucky that man who accidentally invented a radio set which listened in on the conversation of neighbors lived in Texas. where they are not crowded together.
New Britain herald., 1926-12-21

Member of the Associated Pvess. The Associated Press is exclusively en- titled to the use for republication of all nsws credited to ft or not otherwise credited ,n this paper and also local news published therein.
New Britain herald., 1926-12-21

How many children in New Brit ain who changed their views about the existence of Santa Claus since this time last year?
New Britain herald., 1926-12-21

Maybe the board of works en- ployes are trying to play Santa on the side.
New Britain herald., 1926-12-21

If you think politics easy. try standing on q fence while keeping one ear on the ground.
New Britain herald., 1926-12-21
THIS WAS \ WOMAN!

GAS Found in THE FUN SHOP Joke
 Factory) Edward How long have you known Claire ?' Lee: Why I knew her when she wore her fur coat only on Sundays"
 Charles l.. Raives GAS reported by other FUN SHOP contrDutors)-
 X Long Time Thomas: How long have you known Miss Nelson" 2"
New Britain herald., 1926-12-21

Perhaps the doctors are right. It's the teeth in the Nolstead law that cause all the trouble.
New Britain herald., 1926-12-21

York at HotalinXs Newsstand. Times Square; Schultz's Newsstands Entrance Grand Central. A.nd Street.
New Britain herald., 1926-12-21
Same Old Tinn

Salesman: T want you to know that I have a good record." Boss: 'Sure.t and we've all heard il. Put on a new one."
 Il. c. Buchler.
New Britain herald., 1926-12-21

It is worthy of note that few sta tues are erected 10 men who had no women 10 boss them.
New Britain herald., 1926-12-21

President Pearson of the New Haven thinks the railroads should have rate increase of 10 per cent. But as Santa Claus, Uncle Sam is a flop.
New Britain herald., 1926-12-21

Exposure gives hardness, but the dear creatures weren't particularly weak -kneed to start with.
New Britain herald., 1926-12-21
Correct.

Teacher: "ls this sentence correct: I walk through the camp" Melville: No, maam. It should be I walked through the camp" Teacher: 'Why?'
 Melville: Its past tents.''
 Nan F.. Roth.
New Britain herald., 1926-12-21

The adjective in "easy payments" doesn't refer to the collectors job, either.
New Britain herald., 1926-12-21
TELEPHONE CALL0
 Businees Office .... 91s Editorial Rooms .... 9c6

The only profitable advertising medium in the City Circulation books and press room always open to advertissra
New Britain herald., 1926-12-21
FdctsondEdncies
 BY ROBERT CULLEN

The hardy pictures didn't get hardy by bowling for relief.
New Britain herald., 1926-12-21

4 true democracy is one in which the rich get every consideration granted the poor.
New Britain herald., 1926-12-21

On most of the All-American teams you find one or more names that sound American.
New Britain herald., 1926-12-21
THE FUN SHOP NEWS WEEKLY

Do Your Christmas Stepping With tired feet the Christmas clerks Go home when day is done: Poor dears. They're too fatigued to
 dance
 Till very much past One.
New Britain herald., 1926-12-21

A good driver is one who swallows his vanity to keep a fool driver from killing himself.
New Britain herald., 1926-12-21

Americanism: Placidly breaking are so wicked as 10 break others.
New Britain herald., 1926-12-21

Sophistication: Looking as though you didn't mind the cover charge.
New Britain herald., 1926-12-21
New Britain Herald
HERALD PUBLISHING COMPANY

Issued Daiy Sunday Cxcepted) At Herald Bldg. (? Church Street
New Britain herald., 1926-12-21

Civilization won't be hopeless un- til man can get into the headlines just by being decent.
New Britain herald., 1926-12-21

Something in black satchel might settle the oil row in Mexico
New Britain herald., 1926-12-21

Do your Christmas shopping early that is, no later than p. m.