Evening star., 1926-03-26
MeditatiOns Of a Baby on a Trip to a
Child Welfare Conference.

Child Welfare Conference.
WHEN my mother dressed me in
w clean clothes that morning and
nut a double diaper on me I declare 1
did not know what I was in for. 1t
was a nice, bright day. and when she
tucked me in my go-cart as usual we
seemed all set for a fine time. Mrs.
Jones' black cat was out taking in the
view from the fence, and as we went
by the Suttons' yellow dog darted out
and began making his usual futile
leaps at her serene highness. L found
it an entertaining world-altogether
an auspicious occasion, as one might
say.
I did not feel at all uneasy, as my
mother kept on trundling me into re-
moter purlieus of the city, and sud
denly we turned into a grassy yard'
where there was a sea of baby car
riages parked about wing or a vast
building.
Nor did I object when she lifted
me out and started through door In
the wing. I was a bit cramped by my
long ride. and it was good to stretch
q bit. but the noise which Smote my
cars as we entered and the going and
coming in the long hall struck me as
strange and unnecessary, and was
about to lift up my voice in protest
when my mother whisked me into a
most diverting little room with glass
walls on three sides. There she
pIanred me in a clean white crib and
began to undress me. This process,
though familiar to boredom, seemed
SO out of place. under these clrcum-
stances that ! made up my nina tnat
a. fuss was justified, and opened my
mouth to give one of my loudest
hawls. when. at the opening of the
door, appeared a daZzilnS young iauy
with a white apron, blue kerchier
over her head and a measurinag tape
in her hand.
"Oh. what a long baby" she cried,
measuring me swiftly. | had hastily
renressed my emotions which seemed
out of harmony with such charming
vision, and in stage-Struck silence, al
lowed my mother to carry me,
wrapped in my blanket, to the
scales" Ito be weighed" as the vision
described it.
Now-to explain my subsequent be-
havior-the scales were different from
anything ] had ever seen before, ana
I did not like their looks. Nor. when
nv mother seated me upon clean
paner napkin laid upon the cold iron,
L
snot. and | demonstrated as much by
leaning from the scales in the direc-
tion of my mother, who barely caught
me bv one arm did you get his
weight?" said my mother, gasping.
We'll. no. / didn't have time" said
the other, I'VE must try. again.
Thereupon | let out all the pent-up
emotions of the past. Ny mother was
aghast, but that did not deter me.
Indeed I had found that the first step
in getting my own way was thor
oughly to intimidate her by my hoWls.
So T went through all my different
crescendos and clunS to ner ike a
burr when she tried again to place me
on the scales.
There followed a struggle to detach
me from nv mother at the same time
that I was in contact with the scales.
FINALLY the lady said: well, / think
that fs the nearest / can get his
weight, you might as well take him
to the doctors Office now" This was
the monent I had been waiting for to
start something which nevev failed to
suhdue my mother.
"Oh, nurse. He's holding his
BREATH" said my mother. Said that
brutal young lady whose severity so
belied her looks: 1.-The best way is to
give MIN d slap VII illo OtiSn. was
proud Of my mother when she clasped
me to her breast, "Oh. miss. never
slap him." she protested.
'.ne young lady looked at me un-
easily, "I really think you had better
do something. He is turning purple. ;"
she said My mother looked anxious
and suddenly pa anic-stricken. she gave
me a smart slap on that already In
suited spot.