davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
New Britain herald., 1926-07-10

easiest thing in the world to sc, complIsh. We doubt if the critical 1 alderman could so arrange the sig
 nal apparatus that tt would not ! lead into many such difficulties as are outlined above every day. We hire policemen here, not engineers and We can scarcely expect the po- lice to be traffic engineers, though
 we can ask them to study the
 problem they have in hand with the view Of getting the best results
 possible.
 The traa1c light towers are now
 set 10 operate automatically They flash on and off. regulated hy . cIockwork, at stated intervals, whatever the traffic conditions. They were planned to do away with a policeman standing in the street. which function they perform. But f might be well. at several hours of the day 10 guide them by a po- hceman instead Of clock. The hu- man element Is necessary even in this mechanical day and age. The 1 policeman could see whether there was block in traffic ID one street or another. or whether the way was clear and he could handle the lights, regulating traffic at his post . accordingly.
 Much of this bother about street traffic is unnecessary. The fact is that the city streets are as well adapted as those Of other cities to take care of our automobile rush. Eventually there must be drastic changes made in some localities, providing the prejudices of the property owners in these localities can be overcome. All Of our trou- bles. all of the merchants unrest. can be traced to the parking prob- lem far more than the traffic prob lem, And the fellow who can lead us from the wilderness of curbside automobiles and suggest a means Of accommodating the shoppers and doing away with the non-pro- ductiye machines that are lining our streets has not been found al this writing. We hope that the al- derman and the chief of police will look for him. If they find him their fortunes arc made. AS for a con- structive suggestion along these lines - we give up.
New Britain herald., 1926-07-10
\ DIFFICULT TIME FOR REFORM

In this world everything that is worth while, except the air we breathe. seems to cost money. Self government. which should be the most exalted of political occupa- tions, costs money and plenty of it; and reform efforts by individuals or 1 organizations of whatever kind usually require money-giFers in the background.
 II took money 10 continue the agitation and propaganda against the African slave trade, first in England and then by the abolition isls in the United States. In Eng land, between 1912. when the first parliamentary vote on the question was taken. 10 1897. when the aboli- ton bill passed in parliament, the campaign was conducted in pre- cisely the way of reforms in gen. eral-through the raising of money 10 pay for meetings, speeches and pamphlets, all designed to elect members to parliament favoring inc reform.
 But there may he differences of opinion regarding the value of various reforms. Some it may be gathered, are not worth the effort; in these days particularly We seem 10 hc satisfied with reform. It is q period of letting well enough alone, and there seems to be more Of q desire 10 undo some of our so-cau- ed reforms than to add new ones to the statutes. How long il will lake for the nation to return to its arstwhile stride of being willing To try everything once is q matter of opinion, Certainly no one, taking IlOAt hl lItt ltLSSll uuH LOW pol- tics, inc indifference toward voting and the issues trotted forward by politicians, can come 10 any other conclusion than that the nation has become. at least temporarily, sur- feited with the idea of change The pendulum may swing the other way in time; for the present, how ever. the American people seem to he well satisfied with the extent of their advancement in the direction Of reforming themselves. We are prosperous, self-satished, smue and contcnted; the only discontent that exists IS in connection with some Of the reforms wo already have. These. in fact. make Us less recep. iiEe 10 others.
New Britain herald., 1926-07-10

evident that the commonly accepted claim that it costs n cents mile 10 operate 9n automobile does not apply rr ,auaf force upon all autom IFS.
 The published in the Herald M lay and were based upon the uhIs d.'aiIed survey of the kind eyar undertaken. Depreciation of cars is an important figure in any such compilation, and if the average life of a car is eight in- stead os five years, f will make huge difference in the cost of oper- alton per mile throughout the term Of usefulness.
 There Is also the matter of maxi mum transportation, for want of better name. to be taken into con sideration. l. costs very little more to operate car loaded to capacity than ii does to operate one with only the driver in it. The average man does not use the car 10 trans port only himself, but utilizes il with his family. To take a family Of average size to the shore and re- turn costs no more than If the owner drove there and back himself
 Based upon an average life of eight years, and full occupancy Of the available seats, the ten cents annie diagnosis does not apply either in connection with the motor vehicle or calculated per person. On the latter basis it will be more in the neighborhood of less than two cents per mile.
New Britain herald., 1926-07-10
TELEPHONY OPERATORS WERE LIKE. RADIO
 NEER,S
Umagincd by Gertrude BardarD

Nma9incd by Gertrude HardarD
 This is telephone girl KYRH hroadcasting! Hello folks! I've just received word from Mrs. J. L. Smythe saying that her number came in fine! Thank you, Mrs. smythe! Here's a wire from A. r. Boone saying that she got her num- her and enjoyed it immensely, That's fine! Now, if you get your number folks, he sure and let me know by mail, wire or telephone. Our next number will be Benton 546lW, re- Qucsted by Arthur J. Johnson, and the next will also be q request mum. ber this one from Mrs. s. r. Wink. leigh. entitled; Spring 15746!
 This is girl KYBX broadcasting our regular program. Let's go!'
New Britain herald., 1926-07-10
25 Fears Ago To-day

Allen Page, attorney for the Con- nocficut Co.,. appears to have sense of hunor not appreciated by Lhu subway commissioners. When the subway bill was passed some in- diyidual. presumably Mr. Page, had d substitute reported and passed preventing the city from building any further subways. Now Mr. Page has asked the city to build 2l- duct subway from Main street to the power station, which cannot be done. The company may build the subway itself.
 The striking machinlsts announce that they are as firm as Gibraltar, They have received check for S200 from the pollshcrs and buffers and another for $25 from the clerks.
 Chamberlain council, Jr, c. |. A, Nj, celebrated it's eighth anniversary lin Wards block last evening. The committee in charge consisted of Ernest Woods, Louis Caldwell, Lewis Norton, W, C. Rowe, and Joseph H, Lutz.
 The St. Johns German Lutheran Sunday school will hold 8 picnic next Saturday afternoon at Walters grove on the Shuttle Meadow road. Rev Martin Caudian has arranged to have teams leaving the foot of Arch street to convey the old peo- pie and the children to the grove.
 IL is no longer necessary to seek out bootblacks on the streets, for now the men and boys engaged in this trade make the round Of the stores each morning shine shoes. collect their money, and depart liko regular business men. Another fea- ture of cosmopolitan life which has been introduced into New Britain is the woman barber. Only one Is here and she slaves with that peculiar skill that was popularIy supposed 10 belong exclusively to the male tom sorial artist.
 The Maple Hi1 golf club is in. censed because the trolley company has so long deferred ifs request for a station near the links. II is stated that Prosecuting Agent Eirkham is going 10 wage a vigor- ous var against the hard cider joints around town. Some of the cider sold as unferme0ted has an iuebriatng strength that cannot be odualled hy anything except dis filled corn and rye or the old fashioned Kentucky bourbon. Beer isn't in if with cider. There was q time when jug in tho havfield vas filled with a mixture of Jamaica ginger, molasses and lemons; which was guaranteed to head off inc col- ic quench the thirst, and at the samo time not interfere with tho work. Now jugs of cider are used Ii Is pleasant picture 10 sec q man drinking from jug and 10 hear tho eurgle: if is the man with the jug and not with the hoe who sings at his work. But tho cider orordoos this and the prosecutor is out to put places that sell It tr the thirsty man,
New Britain herald., 1926-07-10
THE TRAFFIC PROBLEM
 IN THE CITY

Alderman Nair's statement to the effect that proper coordination of traffic would relieve the necessity for left turns and one way streets, made at q recent meeting of q committee which has the traffic problem in this city upon it's mind. has some merit. The antics of the chairman of the ordinance commit tee in proposing various traffic changes, his seeming variance with Chief of Police Hart upon traffic rulings, and the general instability of the traffic situation. are not 10 be wondered at. all things consid- cred. The alderman undoubtedly is beset upon all sides by indiyiuals who have or think they have, something 10 gain or lose in regu- lation Of the stream Of vehicles which passes their doors, He has many interests bcsieging him, us well as Chief Hart, and it is hard indeed 10 meet the wishes of a group of people, each with some personal angle upon q situation.
 Our traffic troubles will probably never be regulated SD that there will be no murmur of dissent heard from any quarter. There are too many machines and too many in- dividua1s for that, But it is well to publicly air varying opinions and give all sides an opportunity 10 be heard. Then. when final steps are taken there can be no cry Of "They put one over on me and mine"
 But let us return to our original theme, that Of coordination Of tranlc and the justice Of the Alder- mans remarks upon tha subject. Few Of Us but have noticed that It often happens that traffic lights st the Center, Stop and Go" signs are set against tho stream of auto mobiles when tHry ought to show the green light, and vice versa. A train. for instance, IS using thr tracks at the north Of the Center and traffic is held up while tho green light bulhely signals Go" When the train gets clear and a string of machines wishes 10 pro- srcss Inc red signal flashes on. Likewise ii often happens that 8 trolley car one Of those yellow space occupiers the bane of auto- mobiIists today, is stopped near the corner Of West Main and Washing Ion streets, holding up a string of autos as its passengers embark, And the sign on tbe corner of Mait and West Main says Go" Yes. the traffic is not co-ordunated.
 In defense Of the police though. if fig only fair to state that CO., ordination of traffic is not the
New Britain herald., 1926-07-10
A SCHOOL INSPECTOR

>oa that the school committee has engaged John E, Downes az superintendent of construction and repairs il is 10 be hoped there nill be no more examples of poor workmanship in school buildings, such as caused the undermining of inc Smith school. with is consc- qlent bill Of expense.
 The choice Of 3lr, Downes comes at a time when the school commit tce hts the largest building program ob ils hands in the history of the city IL is especially necessary 10 have thorough inspection Of build ines al such a time.
New Britain herald., 1926-07-10
One Man Killed When Big
 Circus Tent Blows Down

Erie, Pa, July 10 P>-One man vas killed, seven others were in- iured. one seriously last night when 9 large circus tent. housing seyeral thousand spectators at an exhibition by the 101 Ranch. was wrecked by q heavy wind and rainstorm.
 Charles Duncan of Erie. vas crushed to death when a heavy tent pole Was blown over on him.
New Britain herald., 1926-07-10

Tn the old days there was about one filling station to the block. but one sta eeered out instead of driving out.
 The king of Italy has 2 sense of humor, a.yway. He hasn't abdl- catcd.
 America needn't sneer In this land there's many Q dictator not yet two years old.
 If only the world could learn that Red convictions never are intellect ual, but lways economic.
 A Republic is a place where you can't bla.} }e any particular individ- ual when you're bossed.
 Correct this sentence: "4e gives much 10 charity" satd the man, but he doesn't enjoy being told how good and generous he is CProtected by Publishers Syndicate)
New Britain herald., 1926-07-10
LOYALTY By Wallace M, Baylies

l went with Il. girl for stroll; We answered the call of the wild And wandered by river and knoll; By Nature We both were beguiled. And, as all such strolling folks do. We gathered some pretty bouquets Of various wild things that grew In forest and 1len hideaways. Our bouquets were beautiful, yes; But if you could only see me You'd grin. for my hands are d
 mess;
 My face is so puffed l can't see! itch something fierce, and l
 scratch,
 Because, in my ignorance blind. l picked pretty leares from a patch Of iyy-the poisonous kind! But though I sop sugar of lead On postuIos that burn me like
 flame;
 And though l scratch spots on my
 head
 That kep right on itching the same; And though it's fact that today I look like id been through a war, I write. between scratches, to say The lady i worth scratching for!
New Britain herald., 1926-07-10

In telling the Associated Press that he himself caused Prince Carol to renounce his claim to the throne, King Ferdinand of Rumania blamed the necessity upon his sons moral delinquencies." Here IS a father who cannot stand for too much ioy-riding in the family.
New Britain herald., 1926-07-10
No Time to Lose.

I was sitting on the porch with my little broth, Jack aged three years, Jack WAS watching the sun going down. and twilight slowly creeping on.
 All of a sudden Jack jumped up and ran 10 the window and yelled: Come, mother! Come quick, if you want l. SC how fast it's getting too late"
 Copeland Veronee.
New Britain herald., 1926-07-10
JABBED BY PTTCHFORK

New Haven, July 10 P>- While stacking hay in Northford yesterday. Albert Bummell, IS, received the prongs of a pitchfork In his throat and chest in endeavoring to quiet q horse. The horse kicked the pitch fork from the lads hands and the prongs entered the latter's body.
New Britain herald., 1926-07-10

In England they are solicitors and barristers; in the United States we call them attorneys or lawyers. Call British solicitor or barrister an attorney and he will be insuted: call an American attorney a bar risler and he won't know what you mean.
New Britain herald., 1926-07-10

Member Ap<It Bureau of Circulation. Ins 4. B. (. is national organlzauol whic, furnishes newspaper and sdFt5 , ttsers with & strictly honest analysis o' circulation. Our circulation staufuot are based upon this audit. Thls insure 1ro+sction against fraud in newspaper di~rtbution figures to both national and local advertisers
New Britain herald., 1926-07-10
IN KLaSS AT KRAZY KOLLEGE tConductcd by Judy)

Teacher:
 "Mr. Menterie, there is still enough time before the Goofy Gong for one more question. There is, in other words ample time for you to give your attention 10 the word 'adoquatc Rudy Mcntcrie: "The cannibal chief ate his subjects
 and court He ate up his father and mother, He ate up his wife and his uncle
 and aunt, But he adequate sometime or other"
 Evelyn Froehlich
New Britain herald., 1926-07-10
kRA7Y KINDERGARTEN Conducted by DuSty)

Fletcher:
 "I dident notice you come in this morning, Levy" Lev A. Lone:
 Nobody did, I slept heer last nitc." Fletcher: You win. The werd is 'derelict, Levy A. Lone: "A boy in a Horatio Alger book Wouldent lie or stel or imbezzle, So wen the villin tempted him, Den and derelict him to a frezzle."
 M. G. Calligerous.
New Britain herald., 1926-07-10

Increased postal receipts may re- fleet increased business, but they also may reflect increased auantl- ties of circulars heading for the wastebaskets of the nation.
New Britain herald., 1926-07-10
Tnrpfinp1

First Chorus Girl: T hear your big butter and egg man is quite crui s."
 Second Chorus G'.l: "Yeh? Sos your oil man,"
 Bernard Carroll. tCopyrighI, 1926. Reproduction
 L'orbidden)
New Britain herald., 1926-07-10

One fact about & presidential vacation is that even the tsh which are caught share in the nation wide publicity. But how about the ones that get away?
New Britain herald., 1926-07-10
LIFE OF ALTOS AND COST PER MILE

If tbo average life of motor ve- hicies has been found 10 be eight years instead of only five, as was previously believed. and there are some in Connecticut which have been in operation 16 years. it is
New Britain herald., 1926-07-10
Facts andFancies
 BY ROBERT CULLEN

The way 70 get ten definitions Of a light lunch is to ask ten men.
 Old expressions aie hard Take prize fight" We still have the prize.
 The ner generation may he hard to fool in some matters, but f thinks it is drinking whiskev.
 Still, Ananias would have had his good points as a caddie.
 In every election some man has the solid backing Of all the right eous people who don't vote.
 Maybe even the courts will get peered in time and hang somebody in cffigy.
New Britain herald., 1926-07-10
Eighting Attributes

Battling Brown: Has Slugger Smith got any bouts lined up?" Red Williams: No, but l under stand he is fishing for one.'
 Battling Brown: Hell probably get it, too. He has good hook and his manager has a good line"
 II. D. Link.
New Britain herald., 1926-07-10

Try the Frl Shop First, Folks. Laid in your sport clothes outfit
 yet? Well list,n, Folks, and don't forget: THE FL; SHOP can supply each
 need And make LIS all good sports indeed,
New Britain herald., 1926-07-10

When the West Main street paw ing is completed il will be just like the police to hold the going down 10 S5 miles an hour.
New Britain herald., 1926-07-10
The Directions

By looking at your eyes" said the doctor. T can see that you haven't enough pluck! Get some color in your cheeks, and you'll get well." Tn cyeni: 2 she told her husband II hat the doctor had said.
 He said if I would use more rouge and have my eyebrows pluck ed Id get we'll"
 Sarah Smith.
New Britain herald., 1926-07-10
Strange

Office Boy 'Did you see your husband"
 Boss Wife; No, his secretary told me he was holding a confer ence.'
 Office Boy: That's q funny name for a skirt, ain't it?"
New Britain herald., 1926-07-10
@S8s D -ME-z4 >8 / fun chOp
 O. :"
 HAxs0g nXHALL LEEz

Send all communications to Fun shop Editor, care Of the New Britain Herald, and your letter will be forwarded 10 New York.
New Britain herald., 1926-07-10

Presidents Of the Emergency Fleet Corporation come and go with the regularity and precision Of French premiers.
New Britain herald., 1926-07-10

The drive of the motorcycle squad
 Of the police department against speeding automobile drivers, which has already resulted in several pros
 cautions, should be continued No body has the right to drive motor vehicles on city streets at 4o miles
 an hour, Even SD miles an hour is too fast in the city where there are !ntersecting streets from which oth-
 CT cars are likely to come at any minute.
 Accidents are bound to happen where vehicles are operated. There
 were accidents when none but horse drawn vehicles were on the streets, and the records Of a decade or more
 ago show that bicyclists often tried
 to get two vehicles where room for
 but one existed. Then came the au- tomobile and accidents and fatali- ties increased in alarming propor- iion.
 The speed limits should be en- forced and the vigilance of the mo- torcycle officers this sumner indi-
 cates that fast drivers must slow un or suffer the consequences. Fines are being imposed in police court and suspension of licenses follow
 This seems like just punishment for
 drivers who do not consider the
 lives and property of others.
New Britain herald., 1926-07-10

Florida is now attempting 10 lure dissatisfied western farmers. being sure to snare those who think no change can be for the worse.
New Britain herald., 1926-07-10

Italy has Its radio troubles the broadcasting stations at Rome and Milan having complaints that recep- ton of their programs are spoiled by interference of the Coltando sta lion.
New Britain herald., 1926-07-10

The Herald Ia or sale daily In New york At Hotarng's Newsstand. Times square; schultz's Newsstsnds. Entrance Grand Central 43nd Street
New Britain herald., 1926-07-10

Msmhet of the Associated Prett Ina Associated Press ts e1clukiFels en- titled to the u.s for republication c! All neEs credited 10 II or not otherwise credited tu this paper and also loea' asws puhliahsd herein
New Britain herald., 1926-07-10

The only profitable advertising mea'9H in the CIty Circulation books sHJ nrsss room Hlvays open to sdyertlserA
New Britain herald., 1926-07-10

My father happens to be a tele- graph operator. One day I saw this telegram on his desk.
 Prospects look good,
 Come with horses.
 Win arrange dc tails,
 Jack Webster, Jr.
New Britain herald., 1926-07-10

Ii is common sight to see but terflics of all sizes and colors fitting from flower to flower in garden
New Britain herald., 1926-07-10

your freedom from doing the tasks which the others must perform, and telling the rest how much fun you are having. This as we said above. must be absolutely unique. So far as We know, nobody has ever done it yat-and lived.
 l. will be interesting to watch the board of fire commissioners make g selection from the different makes of bumpers which have been demon strated this week. Will they conduct themselves as have their predeces- sors for years and years, or will they be able to make a choice with out stirring up dissension in their own body and inviting opposition from the common council? IL is strange, but true, that hardly 3 piece Of motor apparatus has ever been bought for the police and fire department without occasioning bit ter fights and many taxpayers stand by and wonder why it is that the condition exists.
 There is always q great amount Of electioneering done when ap- paratus is to be bought Commission CTS and council members whose knowledge of mechanics is actually limited 10 the ability 10 differen- ljate between screw driver and a buzz saw, stand out consistently for one machine against the field and the people on the side lines, who pay the bills, are compelled 10 sit quietly by and wait weeks and months for their representatives 10 come down 10 earth and realize that the purpose of the appropriation is to obtain the apparatus and increase the fire protection.
 It is all very well, and good busi- ness. to investigate every article that is offered for sale. No one, whether in private or public business, should jump at conclusions and purchase the first thing that comes along, but the field Of fire apparatus manufac- ture has been well trodden by eXper- fenced feet, and it seems that 8 bumper or any other piece of ap~ paratus could he bought and in- stalled in service without making it the subject Of a cat-and-dog fight among men who are elected and ap- pointed 10 do city business in a business like manner.
 The new board of fire commits sioners, when il recommends the award of contracts for the new Stanley Quarter fire house, and the bumper will be put 10 it's first com mon council test. For the past three years, the common council and the fire commissioners were highly an- tagonistic, one to the other, so much so. in fact, that it vas com mon talk about city hall that if the commissioners wanted q certain measure adopted. they could feel cer- tain it would be done if they rec commended to the council the op- posite of what was actually wanted. The pubic will watch thu relations between the present board and ths council and all save those who dear ly love q fight, whether in the prize ring, the street or in the political arena, will hope that a solution of matters of moment can be made poaccably and without continual de- lays and bickerings.
New Britain herald., 1926-07-10
New Britain Herald
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fuwusd Daily Sunday Exceptedl At Herald Bldg- s7 Church Street