New Britain herald., 1926-11-13

this? Would it not be better to wait until more important armistices have been agreed upon?
 By way of explanation, we append list of rivals between whom ar armistice would seem much more worthy of joyous paeans than that of 1918:
 The Republican party and Wis consin.
 ! Mussolini and the Bolsheviki. Modernists and Fundameptalists. Ku kluX Hlan and non-Nordics. Dewey and Gabb.
 Al Smith and the w. c. T. U.
 Weather forecasts and the wealth CT.
 Motorists and pedestrians. Harvard and Princeton. The board of adjustment and the Masons.
 Tad Jones and the Yale alumni.
 President Coolidge and his spokesman" Hartford and New Britain high  schools.
 We have no doubt that If these antiquities could be squelched the world could we'll stand such trivali- ties as world wars. In fact, when the Armistice Day to celebrate the end of one of the really dcep-s seated and serious affairs mentioned above rolled around and chanced to fall at a time of Armageddon, we believe it certain that both sides would lay down their arms for the day. ad- journ to the nearest speak and fraternaly join in good strong drink of tea.
 Wherever there is public gath ering you'll find them. Webster hasn't classified "them," so for the present we'll allow that description to stand, while we attempt to convey to you just who is meant by them" and when we are through we are certain you'll recall having seen many a specimen of the species
 
 band catches the ear. The throngs lining the sidewalks crane their necks in the direction of the ap- preaching music and, sure enough, the parade is hoving into sight. Chil- dren are upraised on their parents shoulders, everyone moves forward, backward or sideward, in whatever direction serves best to afford 8 good place of observation. An! Here's the parade! There's the city officials division; now the commit tee! Isn't that Whosthis marching proudly along? Why, yes, it is! What right has he in there? None at all-but he's one of "them!"
 Tho theater is practically filled. the orchestra pit is busy with mu- sicians tuning up or arranging their music. The ladies have already re- moved their hats and the holding of good evenings" is completed. The zero hour has arrived. Down the cleared aisle comes tsisname. Clear to the front he goes. He stands near vacant seat, removes his coat and folds it carefully, gazes upon inc crowd, smiles at this one and beams at that one. Couldn't he have come earlier? Couldn't he have removed his coat in the lobby? Couldn't he save his greetings for some other time? Certainly, he could-but he's one of them!
 The teams have been on the field and have run through their signals, and are now on the sidelinos. sweaters removed, hoadgears ad- justed and listening to final instruc- tions from the coach. The linesmen are in place and the captains are conferring with the officials in mid field. The conference is at an end and it's principals break in a run. The game will be on in an instant. Wonder where he's going? Can you beat it, he's going to walk clear across the field to the bench of the opposing team. Is he in search of a row? No, that's Hoozit-and Eooz- 1t is one of them!
 The fire apparatus is already on the scene. It now appears that the fire has eaten into the structure to a point that might make it unsafe to have curious onlookers too near, and the fire lines are roped off. The crowd is interested, but patient. A rift comes in the mass of humanity huddled Up against the ropes. A human form comes drifting through, Now he ducks under the ropes. Now he straightens himself and arranges his hat and coat collar. There he goes directly toward the cluttered group of fire department officials mapping out the plan of attack. Is he the chief? No, and he isn't the mayor, or a commissioner; he's Whatchamaycallit, and he isn't at all necessary to the fire fighting activi- ties-but he's one of them.
 The town has many Whosthises Hoozits and What chamaycallits in fact all towns have Their antics conjure up thoughts of the days when Piper brook flowed across Main street and people used to wet their feet crossing over to Central park to hear the fire depart ment band play on the concert stand they're the typical twelve o'clock fellows in a nine o'clock town"