davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1925-12-31
WHISPERED

An evil life is kind of DEATH
Ovid.
Jealousy Is the injured lovers hell
Milton.
When man can't trust himself he
trusts to luck.
Adam had one cause for rejoicing
Eve made her own dresses.
In trying to extend her influence q
woman very often destroys II.
Men are not thankful enough for the
decadence of the frock coat.
We are all imposed upon, more or
A broad-minded man who Isn't deep
is likely to be good company.
less; 1t is part of our earthly lot.
II is painful for a tightwad to Dor
row money and he seldom does.
Angels themselves couldn't be better
than men In love declare that they will
be.
A man makes more good resolutions
when he's broke than at any other
time.
Sweet sixteen will always be charm.
ing no matter what the fashions and
customs are.
The world viii never get any better
until children are an Improvement on
their parents
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1925-12-31
Zez Confrey Mixes
Salads and Songs

ZEE Confrey, famous composer OF
the musical classic, 1.-THE Kitten on
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1925-12-31
NOTHING COULD BE FAIRER

The miner owners have offered to
take the miners back at the old rate
until terms can be arranged for a
new contract. As they say-"While
wages are coming in and coal going
out we can arrange the terms of a
new contract"
This is fair. The public is the
greatest sufferer while the strike is
going on. If the miners will play
fair and go to work to relieve the
suffering of the public, then it makes
no difference how long it takes to
come to terms on rev contract.
At the same time the miners will
be earning wages which they claim
they sadly need. And if the miners
are as destitute as they have tried
to make the public believe, then they
also will be beneftting by renewing
work. The mine owners offer will
be test of the miners sincerity,
But already the union leaders the
parasites who hold fat jobs at the
expense of the miners-are crying
"Wolfl" They claim the mine ,wn-
ers are playing for public support.
The truth Of the business is, they
fear their soft snaps" are threaten
ed.
OF course the public viii appre-
ciate the mine owners offer! 1t
means that whatever the outcome,
the mine owners prove their willing
ness to relieve the needs of the
public. And the union leaders real
ize that if they don't accept the of
fer that they will show their real
attitude-THEY DON'T CARE A
HANG FOR THE PUBLIC, AND
SELFISHLY WANT TO GRAB ALL
THEY CAN GET REGARDLESS
OF WHO SUFFERS!
| predict that Lewis and his CO.
hort of parasites will reject the
offer. BUT | ALSO PREDICT THAT
A GREAT NUMBER OF THE MIN
Frs WILL VOTE TO RETURN TO
WORK.
1t is to the credit of the priests
of the mining region, (for most of
the miners are Catholics,) that they
have urged their Pensioners to re-
turn to work. 1t will be interesting
to note how much influence for good
they can WELD among their people.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1925-12-31

of certain young feline frisking over
the worries has been recognized as the
model of American syncopation.
But Mr. Confrey has other "firsts"
in his repertoire, his acQuaintances
declare. Country bred. he is Judge
of horse flesh, and also knows good
cigar.
The simple life Is Mr. Confrcy's idea
of happiness. Every so often Manhat-
tan gets too crowded for him and he
boards train for the country and
the companlonship Of a certain muir.
muring brook. Inevitably he comes
back with one of the merry tunes for
which he is noted.
A bachelor, ZEE keeps open house
for his friends. II he invites a few Of
the boys over for midnight supper.
he does the cooking himself Invita-
lions to his lively little dinners are
sought after. There are two dishes to
which Mr.. Confrey is partial. So are
his friends, His recipes for the two
follow:
Royal Eggs With Mushroom Sauce.
IL eggs IN cup evapo-
Salt rated milk dill
Pepper uted with
LIS pound mush- IN cup meat stock
rooms (This may be
] slice pimento prepared from
= tbsp. butter bouillon cubes)
IL slices toast tbsp hour
Parsley
saute the mushrooms in two tbsp.
butter, taking care not to burn; make
al
flour eyaporated milk and meat stock.
Cook Ave minutes. Add the cooked
mushrooms and. chopped pimento.
Break eggs and drop into hot fat. be-
ing careful to keep egg In q globular
mass. Just as soon as they are q gold
en- brown lift out and drain. Place an
egg on each piece of toast. Allow two
pieces for each serving. Pour over all
the mushroom sauce and garnish with
parsley.
Plreappis-cheese Salad.
10 SLICES pine Crisp lettuce
apple leaves
1 cup cream tbsp. pineapple
cheese Juice
\ n cup chopped aI tsp, s sugar r.
milk Creamy salad
dressing
Combine the cheese, nuts. evaporated
muk, pineapple juice and sugar. and
blend into smooth mass. Cut pineap-
pie circles in half. Spread cheese mix
ture on slice of pineapple and press
the other half circle of pineapple on
bread in making a sandwich. Cut dia-
monds or triangles from green and red
manages and press into the edge of
apple Lay. two OF the prepared pieces
OF pineapple on crisp lettuce Leaf.
Serve with creamy salad dressing. This
serves .nve'
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1925-12-31
THE CROSSING PARK

One of the finest things the Bucks
County Historical Society ever did
was to start the movement for o
great memorial park at Washington
Crossing. There are few historic
sites in the country that surpass it
in historical interest and perhaps
none so we'll located to make it be-
come the shrine of a great num-
Der of travellers as we'll as others.
Since its inception the park idea
has grown enormously. This State
and New Jersey have approved the
idea. Pennsylvania has made Won
derful park of this side of the
river and there is bright prospect
now that New Jersey will do the
same.-Doylestown Intelligencer.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1925-12-31
The Generous Uncle

Secretary Lawson Purdy of the
Charity Organization society, said in
a brilliant address In New York:
THE poor mustn't be pauperized-
mustn't be made 10 think, I mean
that they're entitled to charity by di.
vino right
Once there was hale old fellow
whom charity had pauperized abso
lutely. For - years he had been llv.
Ing in idleness on SO a week. donated
by the rich ladies of the village.
well, he died finally. and then II
was found that he had left will. In
this will he bequeathed bis IS a week
to his niece In Ireland"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1925-12-31
T. d | T 0 n / A L S
GIVE THE MOToRIsT A CHANCE

Recently an out-of-town motorist
parked his car on Church street in
Lambertville in the forbidden area
opposite the Union Fire House. While
away from the car the driver trans
acted considerable business with
local business man, paying him cash
in advance on the transaction.
When he returned to his car there
was tag on it, and he was ar
raigned before Justice Smith and
made to pay a fine. All of which was
perfectly just as far as the law was
concerned.
But there is another side to the
affair-there is "no parking" sign
at each end of this area, BUT THE
PROHIBITED AREA IS NOT SPEC
IFIED. The man admitted seeing the
sign at Church and Union, but
thought it prohibited parking within
a certain distance from the corner
as is done in most cities. So he park
ed safe distance from the corner
not knowing that he was blocking
a possible exit of the fire engine.
The motorist resented the fine,
saying that he always observed reg
ulations, and that he would not
have parked there if he had known
the entire area was restricted and
why SO he returned to the business
man with whom he had made a
transaction and demanded his adj
vance payment returned. He told him
that if out-of-town customers were
treated with such poor grace in
Lambertville that he would go else
where to trade.
And the business man, in order
not to make an enemy for the city,
voluntarily reimbursed the motorist
for his fine, and tried to settle the
matter amicably.
But still the Church street trap
remains to ensnare the unwary mo-
torst from out-of-town who does
not know why the area is res
tricted and what distance it includes.
The signs should be made explicit
as to the distance prohibited, and
they should explain that it is to
leave ample room for the operation
of Union fire engine, This would
give the innocent motorist chance.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1925-12-31
NJ
8 9
VETERANS COLUMN
CHINLESS WONDER
ENDORSES PARIS CON-
JrEArnInNr rod EnJnN

ENDORSES PARIS CON-
VENTION FOR LEGION
(By the American Legion News
Service)
indianapolis, Ind.,-The recent
news stories about the Paris-in-1927
Convention has brought to life again
that amazing soldier, sportsman,
dilletante and war hero, J. Homer
Barebones, one-time third lieutenant
in the 968th F. A., A. E. F.
The famous Barebones will be re-
membered for his wonderful inven-
ton of "ear- hooks" which not Only
have saved his life but that of
many others to whom the device has
been a boon. Barebones, it will be re-
called, was born without a chin, a
slight wart-like protrustion only
marking where his face went into
his neck. To keep his collar from
sliding over his mouth Ia catastrophe
likely to cause starvation if pro-
longed), the famous Barebones de-
vised a gold hook, screwed on to
the lobe of each ear after the
fashion of earrings. Each time his
collar threatened to engulf his face,
the gold hook caught the linen and
held firmly in the position men
are accustomed to wear collars. In
this fashion Barebones kept his
Adams apple from being confused
with his chin. Readers of war his
tories will recall how his life was
saved by the device when the enc
my, thinking they were squeezing his
Adams apple, grasped his chin in
stead. For this feat, Barebones re-
ceived the Hungarian war cross.
Now, after years of silence, Bare
bones has become aroused in favor
of the "back to France" movement.
He writes:
al thank Heaven | remain alive to
write this letter. Yesterday | was
walking in the park and was Zero
ciouoiy dtldShSu ny ooHiS Bi6"ieie
squirrels With one hand protecting
the young damosel with whom | was
walking, struck down more than
200 before the remaining thousand
grew panic-stricken at my holiness,
and hastily retreated.
"Modestly, | pass over this exploit
not unusual in my varied career
and speak about the Back to France
movement My dear sir, | endorse
this great effort. | favor it. Please
cable the French government that
am coming They will wish to re-
ceive their SAVIOR in appropriate
style.
"To think that | shall see that
foXhole at Scissors where | killed
thirty-seven Germans and saved the
Ninth Brigade from humiliation il
cross-fire!
"To ride again in those funny little
trains. Speaking of trains, / once
saved P. l.. N. train from disas-
ter, an incident, however, not worth
mentioning in detail here.
"At any rate, my dear sir, favor
this trip. You may tell your mem
bers So Say that they shall see
their beloved Barebones in Septem-
Der, 1927"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1925-12-31
My Fauorite Stories
By lRulN S. COBB
God Save the Kings English!

According to a reliable Canadian
authority London firm received
from merchant in Porto Rico let
ter which, properly framed, now
hangs on the walls of the home Of
fice-proof in denial of the ancient
libel that the ENGLISH don't know a
Joke when they see it,
The letter read as follows:
why, for Gods sake, you send me
pump without handler My customer
holler like HI for water.
"P. S.-Since writing find the
d-n handle in the box"
(copyrisht by the MeNsuSht Syndicate. Inc.)
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1925-12-31
KNOCK ON WOOD (ALCoHoL)

During the evening Mr.. Fillstead
became quite friendly with the man
in the lower berth. In fact, their
friendship progressed so far that he
was offered and accepted, few
drinks of a dark liquid which his
new friend produced. Soon after, he
retired.
Dreams of wood alcohol awoke
him, terrified to find the car pitch
dark. In fright he summoned the
porter and acclaimed his blindness
The porter was silent.
~ had a drink with the man be-
low me-" the frightened one ex-
planned
my Gawdw replied the porter
"he died an hour ago. Wait till ali
turns on the lights" -Lyre
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1925-12-31
INK FROM OTHER
PRESSES
Humorous and Serious Topics
From Leading Editors
of the Country
ADVERTISING AND LITERATURE

"Ads should be simple. And they
should stamp themselves on the sim
plicity with repetition. 1t has been
predicted that advertising, by cap
turing the imagination of humankind,
is going to make literature over"
John D. Barry, in San Francisco
Call.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1925-12-31

the Keys" IN
hailed by his
friends as the
most versatile Of
Americas popu-
lar song com
poSers. Those who
know him say he
can mix a salad
or a song oddly
with equal sue
cess. which Is
saying consider
able since his
portrayal of the
daliphtfuI prauk a
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1925-12-31

Solution VIII appear in next Issue.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1925-12-31
SHEER NUDITY

Ny dear, | am not startled
By what you do not wear,
By lipsticks, eyebrow pencils,
By bobbed and hennaed hair.
There's little on your body:
In that | deem you kind,
But grille, this disgusts me
There's nothing on your mind!
Edgar Daniel Kramer in Legion
Weekly.
The Washington times., 1925-06-22
OFFICERS Due
TO TRAIN At
MEADE
D. c. Reservists viii Report
to Brigadier General
Upton Tomorrow

Local reserve officers Of the 313th
Field Artillery and the 320th In
faniry regiments, Eightieth Division
are expected to report tomorrow to
Brigadier General LaRoy S Upton,
u. s. A., commanding general ct
the summer training camps, Camp
Meade. Nd, for fifteen days train.
ing there.
The field artillery officers will
train with the Sixth Field Artillery
and the infantry officers viii be a..
ISOLATED with the Twelfth Infantry.
Captains Charles l.. Ladson. Hal.
lock p. Long and Stanley Webb and
Lieutenants v. o. Bernard, Herbert
Vorchardt, Edward " Heiskell,
CLYDE b. Lanham, Thecelore e.
Watts, Max Bradshaw, Frederick
s. Lee, James d. Power, William
z. Barknan. George III. Chase III,
Edwin F. Fogarty, Walter K. Jones
and Walter Mandery are Of the
313th Field Artillery regiment due
for camp.
Lieutenant Colonel Thomas n.
Stanton il the ranking infantry OF.
ficer from Washington coming 10
camp tomorrow. Other officers Of
the 320th Infantry reporting to
General Upton win be Major Henry
Clifford Turner and Captains M. B.
Driscoll and George L. Rooney and
Lieutenants Paul H. Judy, August
f. Schimmack, Oscar Letterman.
! Alvin T. Basford. G. p. Palomar.
/ George T.. Summerlin III, Eugene
| Wolfe, Francis e. feeling, Stephen
| c. Van Fleet, Isaac M. Capayas.
Harold o. Clayton, Frank A. Gould
and John w. Wiseheart.
The Washington times., 1925-06-22
COL. SAYRE PUT
ON RETIRED
LIST
Graduated at West Point in
1ss4ALed Brigade in Ma {
tionaI Army

Colonel Farrand sayre, United
States cavalry, has been placed on
the retired list on account Of age.
Colonel Sayre Is a native OF
Missouri, and graduated from West
Point in 1884. During the world
war he served in the national army
with the temporary rank OF
brigadier general.
Other announcements are:
Major John NJ. Robinson. on
duty with the Pennsylvania Military
College, Chester, Pa, has been
ordered to Walter Reed General
Hospital for treatment.
Lieutenant Colonel Milosh r. Hill
gard, now attached to the office of
the quartermaster general, has been
transferred to duty in the office
OF the Assistant Secretary OF War.
The President has accepted the
resignation Of Captain Harry r..
Kilbourne, United States cavalry
Major Thomas j. Hayes, ordnance
department here. has been ordered
to headquarters of the Ninth Corps
Area for duty.
Colonel Conrad II. Lama, Seven
teenth field artillery, Fort Bragg,
~. G., has been ordered to duty at
Washington Barracks.
Corporal John w. Shannon.
quartermaster corps, on duty at
Camp Holabird, Maryland. has been
placed on the retired Iist on &C.
count of age.
The Washington times., 1925-06-22
FRIENDS SUMNER SCHOOL
CLASSES ARE STARTED

The Friends Summer School was
opened today at 1911 l street north
west. Glass work is being done
entirely in the forenoon.
G. II. Sensner and w. w. Ar
buckle are in charge Of the summer
classes. Miss Elizabeth Hawthorne
is directing swimming and recrea.
ton for girls. Mrs. Elizabeth Nye
is in charge Of intermediate classes.
The Washington times., 1925-06-22
QUITS State JOB

HARRISBURG, Pa, June 22-Dr
Albert Lindsay Rowland, for thc
last six years building up the State
system of teacher training for Penn.
sylvania, has resigned to become
superintendent Of the schools of
township In Montgonn-
cry county. DIR. Rowland is a Pllilas
and organized the teacher
bureau in October. 1919.
The Washington times., 1925-06-22
BASEBALL STARS TO GIVE
ST. ALoYSlUS FETE PRIZES

Joe Judge. of the Washington
world champion baseball team. will
award $25 to the most coDtented
looking married couple in attend
ance at the annual lawn fete Of
st. Aloysius parish.
The fete will be held at the
church grounds, North Capitol and
/ streets.
Tomorrow night Babe Ruth will
award $25 to the "cIassiest looking
athlete in sandlot baseball" while
on Wednesday, Walter johnson will
award $25 to the largest and
healthiest family.
The Washington times., 1925-06-22
Appointed Sheriff

ELKTON, Nd, June 22.-Alfred
Buckworth. Of the Second district,
has been appointed a deputy sheriff
for Cecil county, succeeding Mat.
thew Pierson.
The Washington times., 1925-06-22

To the person estimating near
est to the winner of the second
prize, and writing the third best
letter on Dancing as a Di-
version"
Evening star., 1925-04-19
Engagements to Wed
Formally Announced

Mrs. J. Milton Young announces
the engagement of her daughter
Carolyn Virginia to Mr.. Jesse Now
bray Hadley. The wedding will take
place early in May at the home of
Mrs. r. H. Gunnell, the prospective
brides grandmother. Miss Young Is
a member of Phi Mu fraternity of
Swarthmore College. Mr.. Hadley is
graduate of Columbia University
and a son of Mr.. and Mrs. A. 1. Had
ley of Florence, Colo.
Mrs. John Addison Porter of $40
Park avenue, New York, and Pomfret
Conn, announces the engagement of
her daughter Josephine Earl to Mr..
Ralph Gibbs Van Name of New
Haven, Conn.
Miss Porter is a daughter Of the
late John Addison Porter, secretary
to President Mckinley, and a great
granddaughter of Joseph Earl Shelf
field, founder of the Sheffield Scien-
tific School of Yale University. She
is a cousin of Miss Mabel Boardman.
Mrs. Porter was formerly Miss Amy
Belts of New York. daughter of
George f. Belts and granddaughter of
Judge Samuel Rossiter Belts.
Mr. Van Name is nephew of
Josiah Willard Gibbs of New Haven
and is associate professor of chemis-
try in Yale University. The wedding
will take place early in the Summer.
Mr. and Mrs. James H. Johnson, jr.,
announce the engagement of their
daughter Florence to Mr.. Francis
Joseph Fitzgerald, son of Mr.. and
Mrs. Joseph c. Fitzgerald. The we'd
ding will take place in the Fall:
Evening star., 1925-04-19

The Ambassador of Great Britain
and Lady Isabella Howard will be
hosts informally at luncheon tomor-
row, when a small company mas peen
asked to meet Sir Edwin Lutyens,
who will be guest at the embassy
for the day. s
The Ambassador of Argentina and
Sonora de Pueyrredon and fheir fam
lily are expected to arrive in New
York Monday, April 27, from Argen-
tina, where they have been for sew
eral months. The Ambassador and his
family went abroad last Summer, and
after short stay in Paris went to
their home in Argentina, later taking
cottage at the seashore for the sum
mer season, which they enjoyed while
it was Winter here.
The Ambassador of France. M.
Emile Daeschner, returned yesterday
from a short visit in New York.
The Ambassador of Italy, Signor di
Martino, will return today or. tomor-
row from New York, where he has
been for a short time.
The Ambassador of Germany and
Baroness Won Nathan are expected
back in Washington Tuesday from
New York, where they went the mid
die of last week They are accom-
panied by Baron Plessen, secretary of
the embassy.
The Minister OF Switzerland and
Nine. Peter will entertain at luncheon
Saturday. May 2, in compliment to the
Ambassador of Great Britain and
Lady Isabella Howard.
The Minister of Sweden, Capt. Wal
lenberg, is again in Washington after
visit in Sweden, having arrived in
Evening star., 1925-04-19
Absentee Embassy Chiefs
Returning to the Capital
Ambassador and Lady Howard to Be Luncheon
Hosts-Social Notes of Interest Re-
lating to Dip ploma attic Corps.

New York yesterday aboard the Maui
retania.
The Minister of Hungary, Count
Szechenyi, will return tomorrow from
brief visit in New York.
The Minister of Guatemala and
Sonora de Sanchez Latour Will enter
tain a small company at dinner this
sinoff, wife of a former secretary of
the Bulgarian legation here, who is
spending the Spring In. Washington.
The Minister and Sonora de Sanchez
Latour will entertain at dinner Sat
urday evening, May 2, in compliment
to Admiral and Mrs. Latimer.
The Minister of Panama and Sonora
de Alfaro will be hosts at dinner
Wednesday at the legation and the
following day Sonora de Alfaro will
entertain at luncheon.
The Minister of Poland and Nine.
Wroblewska will spend the Summer
in Europe and expect to sail from New
York Saturday, June G, and be absent
about three months. They will visit
their home in Poland and spend some
time in Paris.
Nine. Wrohlekska will entertain at
luncheon Tuesday, April 28.
The Minister of the Netherlands and
Nine. de Graeff are spending the
week end in Philadelphia where they
went yesterday.
The Minister of Czechoslovakia, DIR.
Chvalkovsky, has gone to New York
and will sail Wednesday, April %,
aboard the Aquitania for Europe to
take psf i.s .4..e Political conferences,
Evening star., 1925-04-19
Members of Cabinet
Passing To and Fro

The Postmaster General and Mrs.
New are spending the week end
motoring through the Shenandoah
Valley.
The Secretary of the Navy and Mrs.
Wilbur left this morning for An
napolis, where they will be until
Wednesday.
The Secretary of Agriculture, Mr..
Jardine, will return Thursday from
st. Louis, where he went on business.
The Secretary of Labor and Mrs.
Davis expect to go to Atlantic City
the middle of next week for short
stay.
The Assistant Secretary of the
Treasury and Mrs. Charles S. Dewey
have as their guest for a few days
the formers brother. Mr.. Albert b.
Dewey, jr., of Chicago.
Mr. and Mrs. Dewey will sail for
Europe the end of May to remain
a month, and on their return to this
country will go to Jamestown, r. l.,
where they have leased cottage for
the season. So