davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Evening star., 1925-09-20
Prediction Made That Soon Fatalities
Will Add Zest to Quietest of Contests

the mouth of one of the tenors and
proved both unplayable and unsing
able. This cost him a penalty stroke
and he had to drive his next ball with
a niblick to get over the high notes.
The American was all set for his
brassey second when a crowd Of mem.
bers of the Lions Club of Stirling be-
gan pelting him With rice and old
shoes. This embarrR ssed him to such
an extent that he topped his ball and
left himself a 5o6-yard putt. While
he was sighting for it, a game of
blind mans buff was started on the
green and the woman who was lit"
caught and identified him and there
after he had to putt with his eyes
bandaged. BY this time the greens
committee had decided to make GER
tain changes in the course and the
hole that had been the eighteenth
was now called the second, so that
when Boonheffer intimately holed out
holes to play. He defaulted,' having
promised to take his wife to a cinema.
Even with a chorus and blind.
folded" he said, Il could of win on
a stationary course"
BoULOGNE, France, August 90
Senorita Alvarez failed today to swim
Tic LIle SudHIlcl. several pieces
OF hard luck and unnecessary rough
ness contributed to the beautiful Nor
dies defeat. Before she had swum
a mile she came up against a detour
sign where workmen were laying fresh
water over a stretch OF the channel
Back on the main road. the kiwa mis-
Club Of Calais, passing her in an eX-
cursion boat. began to hiss and finally
threw sponges ahead of her in order
to soak up the water and cause dan
gerous shoals.
Miss Alvarez laughed at these diff
culties and was in fair way to reach
her goal when a man later identified
as one Gephart screamed for help, pre-.
tending he was drowning. The gal
liant nimrod asked him where he lived
and when he mentioned Havre she
turned around and towed him back
to the French coast. BY this time
1t was too dark to see bottom and
our heroine went to the cinema.
Evening star., 1925-09-20

at those bright early days in April
when we were all buying hoes and
talking soil and waiting for the snow
to be off the ground. The street cars.
as we went up and down 10 our
Offices. were busy babel of garden
talk. There was a sort of farmer
like geniality in the air.
When ! look back To our bright
beginnings the reasons for our fall
ure seem hard indeed to understand.
The principal one, l think. is the ques
ton of the season. it appears that
the right time 10 begin gardening in
last year. For many things it is well
to begin the year before last. For
good results one must begin even
sooner
Here. for example. are the direc-
tions, as / interpret them, for grow
ing asparagus. Having secured a
suitable piece OF ground. preferably
a deep friable loan rich in nitrogen,
go out three years ago and plow or
dig deeply. Remain year inactive,
thinking. Two years ago pulverize
the soil thoroughly Wait a year.
The young shoots. Then spend a
quiet Winter doing nothing. The
asparagus will then be ready 10 work
at this year.
This is the rock on which we were
wrecked.
Asparagus demands a prepara ton
of four years. To fit oneself to grow
strawberries requires three years
Even for such humble things as peas
beans and lettuce the instructions in
evitably read, Pillow the soil deeply
In the preceding Autumn" This sets
up dilemma. Which is the preced
ing autumn?
If a man begins gardening in the
Spring he is too late for last Autumn
and too early for this. On the other
hand. IL he begins in the Autumn he
is again too late; he has missed this
Summers crop. 1t is. therefore
ridiculous to begin in the Autumn and
impossible TO begin in the Spring.
This was our first difficulty. But
the second arnse from the nllestiar
Evening star., 1925-09-20

Forest Hills Chamber of Commerce
and Fuel Company.
The third fatality of the day oc
Cured in the mixed doubles event
between +. T. Garrison XII and Mrs.
Helga Dooley Einstein VS.. II. Tucka
hoe Quincy XXVI and Mrs. Edna
Squash. In the fourth game of the
first set Garrison was caught serving
12-pound shot which he had mad
vertently slipped into play in place
of the regulation ball. In striving to
return the service Mrs. Squash broke
her racket and went after Garrison
with a court roller which she snatched
from the groundkeeper and six Of his
assistants. She finally overlook her
victim and he will be used in the club
house as a bath mat.
Most of the serious injuries were
the result of a glaring error by the
umpire in the mixed singles between
Jansen and Carey. This match was
called mixed singles because both
players seemed to think it was dou-
Evening star., 1925-09-20

Of the soil itself All the books and
instructions insist that the selection of
the soil is the most important part
of gardening. No doubt it is.
But IL a young man has already Sc
lected his own back yard before he
opens the book, what remedy is there? ?
All the books lay stress on the need OF
"a deep, fria BILE loan full of nitrogen"
My own plot of land l found on ex-
! animation TO contain nothing but
earth.
| could see no trace of nitrogen. /
do not deny the existence of loan.
| There may be such A thing. Last
| Spring my fellow gardeners and L all
talked freely of the desirability Of "a
| loam." But speaking from expert
ence. / should say that the only soils
are earth, mud and dirt.
But ] leave out the soil. In any
case we were mostly forced to disre
gard it, Perhaps a more fruitful
source Of failure even than the lack OF
| loan was the attempt to apply cal
culation and mathematics to garden
| ing. Thus, il one cabbage will grow
| in one square foot of ground, how
many cabbages will grow in ten
| square feet of ground? Ten? Not a,
all. The answer is one.
! You will find as a matter of prac
| tical experience that however many
| cabbages YOU plant in garden plot
there will be only one that will really
grow. This you will presently come
| to speak of as the cabbage. But the
cabbage will be a source of pride and
an object Of display to visitors; ir
fact it would ultimately have grown
to be a real cabbage, such as you buy
! for 10 cents at any market. were Il
not that YOU inevitably cut 1t and ca
! it when il is still only half grown.
This always happens to the on,
cabbage that is Of decent size, and tt
the one tomato that shows signs Of
turning red dt is really a feeble green
pink. and to the only melon tha
might have lived to ripen. They ge
eaten. No one but "A practiced pro
fessional gardener can live and sleeI
Evening star., 1925-09-20

Cause ] had the strangest dream
last night, maybe YOU can tell me
what II means, she says. l dreamed
l was coming through a watermelon
patch. and jest picked up few, alb
sent minded like, when l seen they
wasn't no .watermelons, they was
tombstones and I had clean forgot
to bring the left hind foot of my
lucky rabbit. Bnt then | got away
from them tombstones. and when l
come in the house heah | says to
YOU ] was leaving on account YOUR
mother inlaw is In the Kitchen too
much, and | dreamed when | says
this you-all gimme a raise.
Well, Annie I guess you win, /
says when she had got through. /
have feeling. l says, that the last
part Of your dream Is conner come
true. And after I says this I went
on out on the back porch, and there
I seen our cat. 1t was sound asleep,
but IL woke up when II heard me.
and opened its mouth. But before ii
could meow a word about what 1t
had just been dreaming | got the
jump on II.
Hey kitty kitty, I says, last night
I had the strangest dream, l SAYS,
| dreamed ! went down to the En-
porium. / says. And no sooner had
| got them well worn w0rdS out ina n
what would that darn cat do only
| yawn in my face and get up and
walk away.
|, Hey kitty kitty, nice pussy. | yelled
at it. Come on back kitty. come puss
puss puss. you'll like the nice pretty
story, come kitty-kat, I'll give you a
| nice saucer of cream to inhale while
I am telling you about II. But we
got a perfectly honest cat. Bribery
| wouldn't get her. and every time |
would try and coax her back she
would merely get up and move a
little ways further off and set down
again. looking at me as much as to
say you poor sap. you think you can
| make me mind-well, try and do it,
that's all!
Well naturally by now / was pret
| ~ near crazy. and then. just as I
| was about ready to write that dream
| down and mail it to the President
or somebody, who would I see only
! our dog come trotting in the yard
| And before he could suspect what
was up to, l called him. and the poor
| innocent come right to me, and in
| another instant I had him tied up
! on his leash.
There, says. you lay still A while
! and not a bark out of you until
! get through. I'm conner tell you
what I dreamed last night, or you'll
make sausage.
(Copyright 1875
Evening star., 1925-09-20
BY RING LARDNER.

"O the editor: Recent events in
international tennis, golf and
other So-called sports leads to
4 the belief that In another year
OF SO our sporting pages will
read something like as follows:
Forest Hills. y. Y, August IA
Only three people were killed and less
than a hundred seriously injured at
this afternoons big tournament OF
the West Side Tennis Clubs tua
courts. Oficials attributed the dull.
ness of the occasion to the absence of
FIVE Brooklyn gnnmen who had
bought tickets but were stranded en-
route when the car which they had
stolen especially for this trip ran out
of gas.
Miss Mary X. Browne of California
won her match by default. Miss
Helen Morse Of Vermont. who was to
have been her opponent, felt chilly
leaving the clubhouse and went back
for another sweater. This delayed
her g. minute and half and an impa-
tient spectator shot her dead. This
will learn me a lesson" were Miss
Morse's last words. The assassin was
given a huge bouquet of peonies, his
favorite flower.
The match between Miss Marion
Wilson of Yonkers and Miss Lena
Iangdon OF Georgia was enlivened nv
a slight misunderstanding. On one of
Miss Wilson's returns the ball struck
foot outside the base line, but Lines
man Fred Cantcy of Utah called it
good. mo such a thing" cried Miss
I,angdon. We'll, then. out said the
lnesman. 1T was good" said Miss
Wilson. We'll. then, good" said the
linesman. Get your eyes open. you
big stiff cried Miss Langdon rush
ing at him While he sat stupefied
as usual, Miss Langdon jumped to-
ward him with spiked shoes extended,
knocking him out of his chair and ere
ating several new divots in his face.
Rooters for the Tennessee star leaped
out of the stands and assisted in pun
ishing the offender. who died on the
way to the morgue.
Joseph Grant another linesman,
late of the Peekskill Home for the
Blind. aroused the ire of the fans in
the Kaiser.Jones affair when he called
a. foot fault on Miss Jones. Her
sonal, as it Is known that she pays
frequent visits to the chiropodist.
Before one could say Jack Robinson
or even mention Mrs. Robinson, a
shower of pop bottles hit the turf in
Grants vicinity, one of them striking
him between his artificial eyes.
Miss Kaiser was in wrong from the
start owing to her German name
When 1t was apparent that Miss Jones
would defeat her the crowd yelled
That will learn You to mistreat Bel
eian orphans" Down with the
Boche," and etc. At the conclusion of
the match Miss Kaiser was given a
. shower bouquet of clinkers by the
Evening star., 1925-09-20
Questions From knowledge Seekers
Are Answered by the Man Who Knows All

Dear Mr.. Wynn: l bought a home in
the country from a real estate agent,
who told me it was a two-story house
with modern Improvements. When l
went to see it 1 discovered it didn't
have any improvements and there
was no second floor at all. What did
the agent mean when he said it was
a two.story house? Truly yours,
INA SAPP.
Answer-The agent was right in
telling YOU it was a two-story house.
AS you say all the rooms We're on
the ground floor, that is one story,
and there aren't any improvements
in the house; that's the other story.
Dear Mr.. Wynn: 1 am gRl IA
years of age, going to high school. I
failed in my English test because in
one sentence / had the three words
he and 'prunes." Can you tell
me what is wrong in placing these
Evening star., 1925-09-20

three words together? Yours truly.
I. FLUNkED.
Answer-Your teacher was right in
giving you a bad mark for connecting
the three words he, )" land" "prunes'
The first book of English tells us that
''prunes" is a noun and should only
be used in boarding houses, while the
word and" unlike an adverb, is a.
conjunction. In your example you
have used the conjunction and" 10
conjunct the word 'prunes," which
is a noun. with the word he" The
word he" is a personal pronoun at
all times, except when used for laugh.
ing purposes, like "he-he-he.'
Dear Mr.. Wynn: II Gus is
mans name, does that make aspara,
gus a male vegetable?
Answer next week.
ED WYNN,
The Perfect Fool.
Copyright. 1881
Evening star., 1925-09-20
BY ED WYNN.
"The Perfect Fool"

YUST received more letters from
knowledge seekers. One letter
was written in such rough Ian
~ Suage the man who wrote 1T
must be very tough. 1 could
almost say he was "uncouth." / will
say 1t. He was "uncouth." Another
letter shows me that the writer of 1t
world; In fact, I could say he is
"blase" Gee. I take the darndest
chances with some of my words.
Well. anyhow. letters are pouring in,
and the following are some Of them:
Dear Mr.. Wynn: Where does the
goods so when you get hole in your
stocking? Yours truly.
ANA POLOGY.
Answer-The same place your fist
goes to when you open your hand.
Dear Wynn: 1 have seventeen chill,
dren, and / am the father Of these II
children. and ] want to take my
II children to the circus to look at
buy II tickets for my II children 10
look at the animals. What shall /
do? Yours truly,
I. NJ. SIMPLE.
Answer-Take your II children to
the circus and ask for the manager
When he finds out that the II chill
dren are your II children and that
you are the father of the II children.
you won't have to buy tickets to go
In and take look at the animals.
He'll bring the animals out to take a
look at you.
Dear Mr.. Wynn: While on my vaca-
ton at the seashore / saw something
shaking and shaking about a mile out
in the ocean. AS I did not have my
field glasses. I could not make out ex.
actly what it was that was shaking SO
in the water. My curiosity is aroused.
Can you tell me what it was that kept
shaking and shaking all the time in
Evening star., 1925-09-20

the ocean' l beg to remain. sincerely,
ALMA MOTHER.
Answer-From your description of
the way the thing you saw shaking
so much and the fact that II was in
the ocean, it must have been nervous
wreck
Dear Mr.. Wynn: l am young man.
IS years of age. Because of my health
l have TO quit work a great deal
thereby losing a lot of money. I am
out of employment at present but
have two positions offered to me. One
job is for $1,000 week and one for
$3.50 week. Which job shall
take? Yours truly, p. KULIER.
Answer-By all means take the job
for $12.00 week, because when you are
sick and have to quit your job you
will not be losing as much money as
you would if YOU were getting $3.50
a week.
Evening star., 1925-09-20
He's Right.

Dear john" the wife wrote from
fashionable resort. II inclose the
hotel BILL"
Dear Mary" he responded, II in
do not buy any more hotels at this
hgure-they are cheating you.
Evening star., 1925-09-20
Success.

First Tramp-Strange how none of
our youthful dreams come true.
Companion-Oh, dunno. used to
dream about wearin' long pants and
now I guess / wear 'em longer than
anybody else in the country.
Evening star., 1925-09-20
Family Dog Provides the Only Audience
For Story of That Last Nights Dream
NINA WILCOX PUTNAM.

4 S Sike o. Analysis, the famous
~ mind-reader. once said in his
~ advice to Young Men, Let
4 4 sleeping dogs lie. but don't let
Evening star., 1925-09-20

Copyright. 1881
The Washington times., 1925-03-27
Miscellaneous

COAL, 1915 PER TON
Delivered in city. Be sure and try
ton OF this coal before the season is
over so you can save yourself some
money next year. Blue Star Coal is
q -semf-anthracite coal screened in
egg and nut sizes. A coal for all
pnrposes, low ash. high heat. no
cIinkers.
r. BLUE STAR COAL CO.,
Rosslyn, Va. Phone Clarendon 9s4
The Washington times., 1925-03-27

SZ760 Will build you. : new 4-Toom
house ia southeast suburbs; close in |;
$3.50 cash and from $40 to &5h
monthly For further inf0rTnatio
write Box A-l91. Herald Times.
The Washington times., 1925-03-27

WOODBRIDGE
$500 CASH. SIS PER MONTH
Detached home with rooms and bath,
furnace heat, cleo. lights. garage &
newly papered and painted; vacant.
Price, 1850.
The Washington times., 1925-03-27
GOOD THIN1s no -EAT d

- WUOU IdItGUS To EAT D
0OLDEN CRISP brand potato chips.
Always fresh" Sanitary Potato
FAMOUS BALLOON DOUdHNUTs.
500 PER DOE, VIENNA BAKERY.
sos 18TH ST. N. W.
The Washington times., 1925-03-27

Employment
Observation-Disclosures 80

PRACTICAL nurse. eolored, desires care
OF 5nvaffd or hospital attendant night
duty best references: also No. Col.
Ored cook; cafeteria or In department
store; best references.
THE WOMEN'S EXCHANGE:
13s st. s. q. lincoln 1VV9L'
The Washington times., 1925-03-27
'BRIGHTWOOD PARK 81, $50.
TERMS.

Tapestry colonial brick home con-
tanning six rooms and tiled bath !;
Il .hot-water heat and electric
lights: hardwood floors. Front
porch and large double back
T,orches. Deep lot to an inn
proved street, with room for
garage. House is vacant; owner
having moved out Of the city,
Is anxious to sell, and has re-
duced price.
The Washington times., 1925-03-27

Two-party apartment, on wide avenue.
Two apartments contain four rooms
norches. $500 cash, $35 month. Ex-
cepfionaI buy at $3.50.
The Washington times., 1925-03-27

MORRIS CAFRITZ CO., INC.
18th ard k SITS. Main 1880.
s. Phone Service Until 8 P. M.
The Washington times., 1925-03-27

aodern,f large, like new,
large bath. cleo. bright dry cellar.
large ATTIC! wide porch two 60-foet
lots: 2 blocks g ST. cars; 500 cash,
$35 mo. Owner. 411 Kresge Bldg
nth and. o SITS. N. w
The Washington times., 1925-03-27

Z = ltk9 OAVIlSJ4tI1AV =
HILLBROOK
$500 cash, $50 per mo. ISIS Gault
Pi. II. d New bungalow, rms.
bath, furnace heat. cleo. liRhts.
garage, II block from car line.
FOR COLORED
+ Ave. near 6th St.-8-ro0m house.
Terms can be arranged. Price, $1,000.
Seward daily gateway., 1925-04-29
NOTICE OF SALE OF ION HAND, AND "UNcLAiMED" FREIGHT
 AND BAGGAGE.

Notice is hereby given that on the fifteenth of May, 1925, at 3 p. m. al the Anchorage Freight. Shed, an "Or Hand" sale will be conducted. At this time the following unclaimed and un marked freight and baggage will be offered for sale:
 1 wagon tongue; marked F. J. Por ter, Anchorage.
 1 Saw on board; marked Mike Bar tovich.
 1 Suitcase personal effects; marked Mrs. c. Dale.
 Suitcase; marked St. Clair.
 Box books; marked Albert Chand Ter.
 l Sack clothing; marked Albert Chandler. Suitcase; marked E. G Pearson.
 Sack clothing; marked Dewey Covington.
 1 War bag clothing, marked J. M Hansen.
 l Sack clothing; marked W. J. Line. ham.
 1 Roll bedding; marked J. F. Ked- ler Iditarod.
 1 Box dental hardware; marked I, R. Walle
 l Pack sack clothing; marked John Barker.
 1 Bundle clothing; marked Versun.
 l Sack clothing; marked John Nel- son.
 l Tool chest; marked G. R Robert sop, Seward.
 l Brown fur robe; marked Ammer- man.
 6 Boxes drill parts; marked Circle o. Berry.
 2 Crates drill parts; marked Circle o Berry.
 s Loose pieces drill parts; marked Circle-O. Berry.
Seward daily gateway., 1925-04-29
TWO WOMEN OF GALVESTON
 WIN IN LONG STATE FIGHT

AUSTIN, Texas, Apr. Ex-Governor Miriam A. Ferguson of Texas has signed a bill to pay 10000 for the site on which the Texas capitol stands. By this signature she ended a claim that originated almost cen fury ago, and brought joy to two aged women residing in Galveston.
 Sholtly after 1880 General T. J. Chambers was awarded 56,000 acres of land in lieu of salary as supe- ,ior. judge of the circuit of Texas, theh 3 part of the two Mexican states. When Texas won independ- trc3 and the new state sought a place for a capital city, about 5000 ac- s on the Colorado river in what was then Bastrop county was select ed. It was part of the Chambers grant
 Geh21a, Chambers put. in claim, bu the Civil War inte1ru >tel tha D. q ceeding:. The claim was inherite l r. tis two daughters, M's Ke { C;aa;I'.ors Sturgis and Mrs. Stella Chambers. McGregor, of Galveston.
 Tic area oi the city of Austin and the rapilt', now on the Chambc,s grant, are worth many millions ut dollars. hut the two wor' I Tn G+l ,-,:t'. ire content wit, ih: stttl,, re:t c.ccied.
Seward daily gateway., 1925-04-29
AT THE LIBERTY THEATER "UNDER THE RED ROBE" tb


 picture shown at the Liberty Thea ter last night, repeated again tonite, more than fulfilled every expectation aroused by it's advertisement. It is truly called a GREAT production with the same meaning that you speak of Shakespeare's plays. There is nothing sensational about it and yet the interest of the audience was held every minute throughout it's ten reels. A smooth, perfectly act ed story wonderfully staged. We can well believe the claim that it cost million and a half to produce the palace sets were magnificent, and the costumes were elaborate. More great plays of this kind are what the people want, and less of the sickly sentimental ones that are the usual dose. And we believe it would pay better, for last night there was a good crowd and everyone came away singing it's praises. To those of our readers who want something good we recommend it.
Seward daily gateway., 1925-04-29
LUCKY MENOMINEES
 NEED NEVER LACK
 FOR MONEY OR FOOD

NEOPIT, Wis, Apr. 29.-One of l the largest single enterprises con ducted by reservation Indians under the supervision of the government will resume operations here when the
 Menominees start the machinery of their new $275,00O lumber, which re- places the one destroyed by fire last fall.
 The mill is the property of the Me- nominee Indians, controlled for them by the department of the interior, and it's lumber output comes only from timber on the Indian reserva- tion. More than $3,00O,O0O has ac- crued to the credit of the tribe since the first log was sawed on January 141,909, according to E. A. Allen, su- perintendent of the mill and Indian agent
 Up to this year it was the only project of it's kind. A similar indus try has been launched, but on a much smaller scale, on the Red Lake res ervation in Minnesota.
 Reinformed concrete in the new Menominee mill will replace the wood floors in the old plant and the hum of electric motors will sound rather than the Tapping of the old belt drive system With no unfore- seen delays, the mill will begin next winter. Ever since it was projected the mill has been a dependable and the most important source of en- ployment open to the Menominees. The law providing for the mills con- struction is that Indians shall be giv- en preference in all classes of work and no Menominee able to perform service shall be refused employment.
 The Menominee reservation com prises ten townships of beautiful roll ing forests, broken by hundreds of fresh water lakes. Beides the vast reaches of timber, there is sufficient acreage of agricultural land to furn- ish good farms for all the Indians.
Seward daily gateway., 1925-04-29
FOREIGNERS IN SWEDEN ONLY ONE PERCENT OF POPULATION

STOCKHOLM, Apr. 2S.-Swedens population as shown by a report oi the royal bureau of statistic is slight ly more than 6,O0O,0O0, and the en tire Swedish nationality, wherever domiciled is estimated at close to 9,000,000. It is shown thatt 7S0,OO0 native born Swedes live outside the country, Of which 625,O00 are in the United States; 30,OOO in Canada; 5O,- 900 in Norway and 36,OOO in Den mark
 The Swedish race in Finland, dat ing back several centuries, number, about 35o,OO0, while the total Swed-