davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Evening star., 1925-05-03
81 SAY FELT LITTLE STRANGE WENT OUT ON


whether, with my throat, this would
be so good
The buttons are in large size Of
mother-of-pearl and are carried in a
bold line edgewavs from the shoulder
to the waist with two more buttons,
larger still, behind at the place where
the back dips in above the hips.
Everybody agreed that the buttons
are very bold, but they thought that
they would be Quieter on the street
than in the house.
The waistcoat is cut very simply
and snugly so as to show the curve Of
the stomach as far as possible. 1t
has just one little pink bow at the
bottom, but beyond that 1T is quite
plain. One or two of my friends
thought that it might be a little bit
too severe, but most of us agreed that
though it might seem severe indoors
it wouldn't be so at all out of doors,
especially on high ground.
The trousers are cut very snug
around the line of the hips with gored
insertion at each side so as to give
free play for leaping or jumping and
then are flared out to the knee where
they are quite full and wide. They
end, absolutely, only little way be-
low the knee, and, of course, they need
to be worn over clocked stockings or
else I have to have my legs tattooed.
They seem terribly short when l put
them on. but everybody says that II
Evening star., 1925-05-03

is the length they are wearing in
Paris and in London and that some
of the men are even cutting off their
trousers half way between the waist
coat and the knee.
l must say that l felt little strange
in my pink suit when I went out pres
emily on the street in it. One of the
men asked me to lunch with him, so
I went out in my suit with just a
little straw hat, half size, and a bunch
of Violets in the lapel of my coat
felt quite shy at first and quite diff
ferent from my usual self, and I
think even blushed when some one
came across to my table at lunch and
told me he had never seen me look SO
well.
X X X X
/ WENT over to my Office in the
afternoon, and the very first per-
son who came in to do business with
me said he was delighted with my
suit, and so we sat and talked about it
for a long time, and he told me of an
awfully good shirtmaker that he could
recommend IL ! wanted 10 get some
of the new shirts they are wearing
He said that over in London they are
all going in for fancy shirts to match
the new suits and that the colors
they wear are the most daring you
can imagine. He told me that a
friend of his, quite an elderly man,
had Just got back from the other side
Evening star., 1925-05-03

couldn't get leave to go to n. Y. and
meet her. So he telegraphed Tobin
and Tobin met her and put her on the
right train west.
3. They was a big business concern
holding convention in N. Y. and the
president of it decided all of sudden
to give a New Years party for the
other officials and their wifes, but they
was one young vice president from
out Of town that didn't have no wife
or female acquaintance of any kind
in. NY. He telephoned Tobin and in
a few minutes he was on his way to
the party with a dame that made the
rest of them look like general house
work.
4. They was a lady down south that
was crazy about a certain perfume
which she had got a whiff of it some
where's, but she couldn't remember
the name of it. She described to her
husband what 1t smelled like and he
looked for it in pretty near every per-
fume joint in the country, but with
out no luck. Ho was about to give up
when he AeaR6 q Tobin and told him
Evening star., 1925-05-03
Public Approval of Bright Pink Suit
Follows Plunge Into Fashions for Men

wearing a canary-colored shirt with
pussy willow tassels round his neck
and that 1t was really quite becoming.
Other people came into my office
later in the day and we did nothing
but talk about the new styles and how
delicious it is going to be for men to
dress in all the colors they like to
wear.
On my way home in the street car,
which was rather crowded, a man got
up and gave me his seat, and, of
course. I thanked him with a smile
that showed all my teeth, but / didn't
speak to him because 1 wasn't sure
whether ought to speak to strangers,
in my pink suit.
Well. when I got home / first stood
| and looked at myself in the long glass
for quite a while. And them don't
know just why-I went and took off
| my new pink costume and put on, the
old gray suit that had worn the day
| before. 1t was made, as far as I re-
| member. about two and half, or else
four and a half, years ago.
1t has no ruching, crocheting, or
| insertions in it, and it isn't flared or
gored or pleated, and it doesn't sweep
boldly round the hips or the neck or
anywhere. 1t has a bulge here and
there where / have sat on it or knelt
In 1t or hung it up on the electric
light. The pockets Of it stick out a
good deal from having been filled up
with pipes and tins of tobacco and
| fishing tackle. There Is more or less
ink on it. but nothing that really in
jures it for use.
Which suit did wear the next day
Copyright, 1920
Evening star., 1925-05-03

"All this etc etc seen everywheres.
What it show? 1t shows that Amer
lea will soonIy have a race Of Nenuses.
You can buy beauty in cans, same as
soup q brass polish
"AIl such fiivolity are alright for
girls" renig Nogi from gloom. But
what benefat will it be for boys?"
"Sir Jno Dempsey are a boy, are
not? 1 say SO. 2l1 crippled prize
listers say so also. Nobody, not ever
ex-Firpo ever suspected him of being
girl. Yet what happen TO Sir Jno?
One day he look into mirror which he
snoggle into training qrs on sly. o.!
he say SO, I seem TO look like some
body aXidently hit me in days Of by
gone. What are that Objeck wcb-
bling in punches almost ezackly be
| tween my calla-fower ears? Are it q
nose? Or are it merely collision?
By gracious. l shall go TO a Doctor &
! ask to know
Therefore he elope to Face Hos
pital & look over katalog at page
marked List OF Noses. He picks out
one entitled Apollo Jr Quick Shifting
Easy Smeller Price l00O00S This he
| got put on and nearly next day he
was married & live happy ever after
! wards
! viii not wearing such expensive
! end on his face make this Sir Jno
/ timbid 6 afraid?" require Cousin Nogi.
| Quite contrary" report. Sir Jno
value that pretty sniffer so high that
! he are prepared to nearly kill amy
/ prizefister who attemp TO knock It
/ off,
Il are unsure about morality Of
! those Beauty Decorations" Nogi ar
ray. Putting pink powder on
/ peaches are not very Pure Food Law
In some horribly reformed States they
have passed Law which makes it ille-
! gal for girls. ladies & women to use
kosmetics, paint, powder or amy
! other form of lpstick."
Which States are Those?" I ask
| to know.
Same ones what has passed law to
| prove Darwin were wrong" confab
| him.
so. well.' l belabor. IF kosmit-
! icks, paints, powder & lipstick are re-
/ fused to ladies of those States it will
| become deliciously easy TO prove that
/ Darwin was right"
Hoping You are the same
! Yours truly,
HASHIMCRA TOGO.
Copyright, 1925.)
Evening star., 1925-05-03
INSTEAD of so'NDiN' Line JAZZ " " ~ LINE

TO hear, which is the correct etiquette
for farewell forever" in that mans
business.
And then we left, and George says
we'll I don't think much of them
Ramblers, l never did. leave us go
over and look at the Stationary
Duplex. that's only STOOLS r. S. V. p.
by return mail.
And l says yeh. let's, I see by the
ads they are putting out a semi
open, combined business and trouble,
or family car. with five individual
brakes, one for each wheel. and one
for your bank acct. It's a seven pas
senger model, with plenty of room for
five in 1t, and l heard Doctor Salary
gets forty-fiYe miles to the gallon of
water out of his. And Geo. says yeh.
So we went on over and give this
one the double ephis. but we couldn I
afford il, on account the Stationery
Co. wasn't willing to allow over 3Sc
on our old faithful. Besides, they
wouldn't give us more than 3 yrs. on
the payments, and wanted to insure
Georges life in their favor before
the notes was signed.
So there wasn't nothing for us to
say only that's perfectly satisfactory
you will hear from US again just as
soon as you near from U.s. 1HeH we
beat il over to where the used cars
held down the floor space.
. / tell you. Jennie, Geo. says to me,
d'you know, he says, in whole lot
of ways q good second hand car is
a whole lot better than a new, cheap
car.
Take one now, that's been in a
good family where it's been treated
like a baby and only driven seven or
eight hundred miles and the paint and
upholstery and engine is all in per-
feet condition, he says, and the family
are only turning it in for a newer
model because they can afford to, he
says, well now, that's what I'd like to
pick up at around a thousand. And
I says, well, if you ever do see such
a car you'd better pick 1t up and run,
l says.
Inside the Asis Used Car Co. the
genteel old dependents of the auto
family was waiting in hopes some
kind person would take 'em out the
pound and give 'em a good home in a
snug garage. Some models was
practically new, around 1917, but, as
the keeper says to Geo. while show.
ing him big old boat, Mammoth
is always a Mammoth, you need
never be ashamed to drive one. no
matter how old they get, and how
does the public know anyways but
that the car belonged to your dear
Evening star., 1925-05-03

George would of fell for it at once,
he is the kind that can resist the
family'S requests, but never those Of
a good salesman.
But l seen where they also had
some open models, and they was so
snappy looking 1 kind of changed my
mind when l seen them, what with
the big rear view mirror they had
where a person could see not alone
to powder their nose, but to comb
their bob and still keep one hand on
the wheel.
SO 1 says to George, L do love
real practical car like that, it's got
a special seat for the dog, too, and
your mother could easy use it any
time she is visiting us. and l do
think the toothpick holder on the
dash is just lovely. And the sales
man, he seen the point, too. Say,
it's just your car, he says.
But l couldn't get Geo. interested.
By this time he had spotted their
Yact Club. Town-touring Eight,
which had n trunk onto the back of
it big enough to carry any suitcases
except the kind we happened to have.
Also it had a top, four wheels and
what the feller called a nickel radi-
etor cap, only it wasn't a nickel, it
was seven-fifty, extra.
And then as a finishing touch, this
saleSbird threw up the hood and
showed us the engine in the nude.
There, he says, is just your car!
There was enough tubing in that
thing for it to hang itself and the
salesboy told US all the secrets of
the power house in one of them Of
course u-know-what-this-is voices
they use, to give you a chance of
merely saying yes indeed. instead
of accidentally calling the wrong
turn on the distributor or stalling
on the engine before 1t got a chance
to stall on you.
And then the salesman closed the
hood reverently, and says he'd like
to give us a demonstration, and Geo.
saws, well, give me a card instead
how much could you allow on my
old boat?
And the feller says what have you?
And George says a brand new 1918
flivver in perfect condition. And the
feller says well, I'd have to see it
before 1 could say positive, but /
guess we could allow you soc at least.
x X X X
nF course we had figured on a few
~ hundred, so we merely says, well,
that is perfectly satisfactory, we will
call again, you will hear from US, and
he says, any time, I'm always able
Evening star., 1925-05-03

grandmother and that you just can't
bear to give it up in favor Of newer
model?
And Geo. says yes indeed. these old
fellers, they got better material in
them then some Of the new ones. And
then he ast how many miles had this
one been run, and the apple sauce
king took slant at the speedometer
TO see, but 1t was broke. And it's a
funny thing, but have always noticed
where, in used cars, the speedometer
always breaks the first of any part.
WELL anyways, we looked at every
W thing he had. There was one real
good buy, hearse, on an old Fierce
chassis, and, as the feller pointed out,
all we would have to do was remove
the body, put on a sports coupe in its
place, trade in the chassis for a coupla
old shoes, or what have you, and we
would have a practically new car.
Well. we didn't buy It, for the Asis
Co. would only give 25% cents for
our old bus and wanted to take it on
consignment, at that. SO we told the
chief there that he would hear from
us, we would call again.
Then we got out. and Geo. says.
well. 1 never did think much about
second hand cars anyways. they may
look good, but a person never knows,
he says. / wouldn't take one on q gift.
Well then what are you conner do?
/ says.
And Geo. says, 1 tell you what. I
am conner fix up our old lizzie, he
says, all l need is a few parts such
as practically everything under the
hood. a differential, bearings, a trans
mission, head lights and a little of
my time, that car amt so bad, the
tenders and the rear wheels is prac-
tically as good as new, he says, or
will be with the coat of Youpainter
varnish / will put on. And II won't cost
me practically nothing, on account
will get all my stuff from Joe Bush.
Well, ! couldn't stop Geo. from do
ing this, so ! went along to the Five
& Ten while Geo. bought the parts for
his car. Joe Bush hustled around
helping him pick out the stuff until
Geo. had pretty near van load, but
no one thing cost over a dime.
I say, says Joe at last, while you
are in here why don't you get a full
set Of new tools for your bus as well?
And Geo. seen where that was a good
idea, so he got button hook, a box
Of hairpins, corkscrew, a tube of
glue and other necessities, and we
took 'em along home and put them
Evening star., 1925-05-03

II are disabled to reply" depose
Nogi.
Because I tell you this" / ronp
with elegant wisedom, 1every kind Of
saw, soap. ointment & drugstore putty
cannot put yr face on straight when
it grow on crooked. 1t are the girl
behind the complexion that do the
work"
"CHUX & shells.2 expunge Nogi.
- What are a face nowadays?
Merely something fix up & down until
II are something different. Suppose
you do not like the front yard of your
head. Suppose yr nose take up so
much landscape that it get in the way
of yr hanson eyes. What you do
about that? Simply go to Beauty
Doctor. get that face over hauled &
extra parts"
"Oh goody." 1 holla. Then I shall
exchange my feechus for something
nice. What famus acter shall 1 look
like?"
Trouble with Beauty Doctors" say
Nogi, ARE that they are like all other
physicians. They never will argree.
Suppose you go to Beauty Hospital
and say to Gen. Staff. L require to
have my face lifted, my eyebrows
stuck out, my forehead refined &
valves ground then they will make
sscientiflck smiles and Step This Way
expression. So fairly SO goodly. But
what neXt?"
You are making the Speech" I
resum.
"All ok. then" dictate Nogi.
''Nextly I know they have led me to
the Amputating Room where walls
are all covered with photos and there
are a sideboard & table on which
persons get carved. Simply lay &
do nothing they rejofnt-whiIe cross
red nurses stretch me. NeXtly l
know they put a megaphone in my
mouth & pour in something that
smell like the perfummery that ar
rives with illegal gin. My thoughts
get all unoccupied.. I Sleep
Nogi stop so l can get time to be
Surprised.
What happen, if anything" I
ask to know.
Pretty much, by golly, happen to
me while 1 are not there 10 prevent
it. or prominent surgeries un-
screw my face & lay it on sideboard.
Now we got him here, Doctor say
No. l to No. 2, we should make him
Evening star., 1925-05-03
Dirigible for Polar Flight.

ERIDTJOF NANSEN, the famous
Arctic explorer, is returning to the
North Pole country after nearly 80
years spent in other work. He has
announced that he Is to head Ger
man expedition which will make a
long flight across the polar regions in
a specially constructed dirigible of
100000 cubic feet capacity, or some
thing like twice the size of the Los
Angeles. A crew of SO men will be
carried and the flight from the Muir
mansk coast, north Of the White Sea.
to Alaska and back Is expected to oc-
cupy four weeks. The principal OBJ
jectives of the voyage will be scien-
tific. Photographs to become bases
for maps of the Arctic regions will
be taken, soundings made in the ocean
and other data assembled. It Is hoped
that the expedition will be able to
start in 1927.
Evening star., 1925-05-03

away in the garage. And the next
SUNDAY he commenced work on the
car.
II that flivver of ours had been one
OF juniors Christmas toys, Geo.
couldn't Of stuck TO making it work
any more seriously then he did. And
IN coupla weeks he had her going
strong and drove her around in the
front for me to see
Come on. Jennie, he says, hop in
and leave us drive over to the Joe
Bushes. They are out TO their cot
tage near the Hawthorne Club now,
and it's a real nice day for a ride in
the country. / wanner go show Joe
the big success / have made out of
the job.
Well, naturally. I done like he ast,
and Hot Bozo. the car run fine, al
though person couldn't truthfully
say IL was more quieter. The main
difference was that instead of sound
Ing like a collision in a dishpan fac
tory, it now sounded like q jazz band
with the collie and etc.
Say Geo, 1 says during the drive,
did you figure up how much it cost
you for them 10-cent parts to do this
with? And he says yeh, not much.
only S700.75 counting my time.
When we had got out to the Haw-
thorne Club, what would we see but
that Joe Bush coming down the steps
Of his cottage.
Hello, Geo, he says, I was Just
starting for your place, he says, I
was worried over them parts 1 sold
you for the filivyer, how does she run?
oh fine. says George, she sounds
sweeter than ever. And Joe Bush
give big sigh of relief.
Thank heavens, he says, on ac-
count after you was gone out the
store l seen where what I had sold
YOU was radio parts
(Copyright lQ25,)
Evening star., 1925-05-03
Duplicates Without Carbon.

YPEWRITING multiple copies
without the use of carbon paper
has been made possible by recent
invention perfected by Max E. Melton,
an employe of the Post Office Depart
ment, according to Popular Science.
His device is attached to a standard
typewriter. 1t consists of paper rolls
ingeniously arranged so that as the
paper is fed to the typewriter platen
the sheets are automatically inter
leaved with duplicating ribbon
The invention, it is reported, is ex-
pected to save the Government
thousands of dollars year. The In
ventor has received a cash reward
for his efforts.
Evening star., 1925-05-03

beautiful as pussible. This are very
sad case This face look like a 1905
model what never had a mother or
father. Would it not be cheaper to
buy him q new face than to munky
with this one? 'Pussibly,' dictate No.
2, but what are most beautiful kind
for him?' One like Jack Barry
MOORE snuggest No. 3. j cannot
stand Jno. Barrymore since he stop
cutting his hair decry No. 2. I
should think he would look nicer
with a hard. fresh face like Hon. 10
Shilllraut' 'Neva, nava, neva' shouch
No. l, "A face like Pres. Coolidge
who hide his firmness with his chin
would be quite stylish 'Ratz &
katz,' they all holla in unicorn while
the nurses gets mad too 6 commence
throwing surgical tools
"Goshes." l say so. In meantimes
what you doing all that time?"
Sleeping" narrate Nogi. And
while my great brain are absent those
Doctors can do what please. Maybe
/ will awake up without amy nose. "
1T would serves you right" l re-
port. 81 always said you got the
kind of beauty what should be sent
TO Home for Uncurables.
x X x /;
HNJHEN / were BORN dlb Nogi
my mother say I were the
very portrait of you
That may be so 6 So" 1 ague.
Yet it must be true that cansider
able can be did to cure homliness
Look at girls surrounding you, They
got their eyebrows skinned, their
chins tucked up & new mouths paint
ed on. They are SO covered with
paints, oils & varnishes that 1t are
| impossible to tell whether they are
pretty or not.
"And look at street cars when rid
ing in them,'' / peruse. See all those
advtsmts what you got to read tc
keep from looking at homely people
| on seats opp. What do those Kal
Kards advise? Following:
Try Our Treatment & Get Lovely
eve Will Take Those Blue Rings
Of Yr Nose.
Electric Chair Makes Lively Girls
Pimples! Pimples! I Cure Them
in Lessons.
Lady Mulligan's Lipsticks. The
Kiss that Wont Come Off.
Ladies Why Be Bald? Go tc
Venus College.
"'Get a New Nose. Permanent
| Durable. Goranteed for 6 Mos
Evening star., 1925-05-03

close to 1000. A few samples of COM
missions he has carried out recently
will convince the reader that he amt
easy to battle.
1. They was business man living
in a good size town that wanted 5000
brand new u. S. pennies to use in a
advertising campaign. The banks in
his town couldn't supply him SO he
telegraphed Tobin and the next AN.
he had the pennies.
2. They was a U. S. army officer
that got married in Europe during the
war. but his wife didn't come back
with him. He was now stationed at a
western post in the u. S. and sent for
her to cross the old pond and join him.
At the last minute, vile she was on
the way acrost, he found out he
Evening star., 1925-05-03
BY STEPHEN LEACoCK.

T HIS morning [ put on my pink
suit for the first time, and l
must say it just looked too
4 cute for anything. l felt, of
course that it was an innova-
tion and a great change, but / was
glad to be in it.
I suppose everybody has been read
ing about the new fashions for men
and how over in London and in Paris
all the men are wearing suits of pink
and sky blue and chrome yellow.
All the London and Paris papers that
l have seen say that the new suits
are d great success and that the idea
is all the rage; But: as | say, every.
body knows about that and l don't
need to explain it. L only wanted to
talk about my own suit.
] had it made out of a pink geor-
gette undershot with q deep magenta
and crossed with an invisible slate
blue so that the material shimmers in
the light with different colors, and
when l walk up and down in front of
q long mirror q bought the mirror
at the same time as the suit, the
colors run up and down my back in
ripples of moving light. The magenta
color seems to suit my figure, though
several of my very best friends say
that personally they think they pre-
fer the slate.
L ndu TWO VI tilLtC VI lllCAlA NNSA
in the morning to sit in my room
and watch me walk up and down in
front of the glass. OF course, ordi-
narily at that time of day they would
be at their business, but l just tele-
phoned over to them and told them
that my new suit was such darling
that they simply must come over and
see It, So they came over and we
Just sat around while I put on one
part of the suit after another and
showed 1t off in the long glass.
They all agreed that the color was
lust lovely and they said they We're
Just crazy to get a suit like mine.
one said he thought that for him.
self the color might be a little young
and that for his age he would rather
have a bottle green or a peacock blue
something a little older, but l told
him that I was quite sure he could
wear anything just as young as any
BODY, In fact, / know a man VINO IS
past so who can wear pink for eVe-
ming wear, and who looks just as
young in it as anybody else would.
* x x X
pERHAPS I should explain, as 1
know a lot of my friends would
like TO know about it, just how had
my suit cut. The coat is made rather
full at the chest and then brought
in at the waist line and cut out again
very full about the hips with cores
and with ruffied insertions of pleated
chiffon at the point where the back
falls to the hips.
1t has a ruching round the neck
and Is wattled around the collar with
an accordion frill brought round just
below the ears and then thrown back
so as to show the back of the neck.
Some of my friends thought that in
stead of a ruching they would rather
have had a little frill of lace so cut
80 to show the throat But / doubt