New Britain herald., 1925-05-16

midst of the staked plain, sc named because here the Indians burned | their captives at the stake. The pastime is jumping of the edge to see if the canyon Is really as deep as 1t looks, although the | river is used once a month by movie l staging thrilling rescue To become a member Of the Grand Canyon club. a motorist must throw at least one safety razor into the great divide.
 Niagara Falls-Consists of the American fall and the Horseshoe. which last Is used for playing water quoits. Underneath the downpour is the Cave of Winds, discovered by q Chicagoan, The whirlpool extends over into Michigan. where it is known as the Grand Rapids and is used as a dump for broken furni- turc. Many quarts Of water flow over the brink once fin a while. Our Aunt Bethclda understands that the former secretary Of the interior was one of the Niagara Falls.
 Mt. Rainer--One of the finest peaks of the northwest, which was named because of the greater amount of precipitation, but may be renamed Nit. Tacoma in honor of the National Biscuit Co. confection.
 Yellowstone National Park--A na- tional park in which a thoughtful government has placed geysers to provide the tourists with perpetual hot water. Motorists who do not take their families here are liable to get into perpetual hot water, any way. There are also mud geysers, which are piped into beauty parlors. The park is filled with huge bears which take things from the tour ist's hand with all the grace and agility of a bellboy.
 The Great Prairie-There is noth- Ing to soc here, az the prairie is very plain.
 The Mississippi Rivcr-all the ex- tra mud in the world flowing out into the Gulf of Mexico to build a land bridge for Americans to get across to Cuba. Traversed by Mem phis Belle" "DiXicland." and other side-wheel ships, on which south ern coloncls play cards and shoot each other in time with negro jazz bands. History does not reveal tho lady after whom the river was named.
 The Main Woods-A he mans wilderness. where one may shoot Moose (why isn't "meese" the plural Of this word?), Elks, Owls, Odd Fellows and Masons. Must be pcne- tratcd in a genuine Oldhometown canoe. Any hunter bagging a real moose will have his portrait painted Tor use on cartridge advertisements; truthful ones will not.
 Amateur photography has always been a popular sport, but since tho motion picture has come into the field a few words of advice are need cd to the young kodakers who would keep abreast of the times. First oi all, we must admit that the only chance is in news photography, so, tt show the aspirant what to take w present herewith the agenda Gas tho British cinema theaters say) of an! sclf-respecting news-recl:
 Scenes of (f1oor, fire) which doe!
 (make a guess) dollars damage il
 (New York warehouse district, Mis- sissippi valley, Tokio, oil fieids), to
 gcther with coseups of dirty chil dren made homeless by the disaster
 (Secrctary, Ambassa dor Violinlst
 Premier) Hoozit Oeaying for, rc
 turning from) aboard S. S Insert
 name of.
 Army. navy) airplanes layin, smoke screen over Washington.
 President Coolidge (signing th , Something bill. taking an carl morning jaunt receiving delegatio . of women plumbers, riding clcctri horse.)
 Vice-Prcsidcnt Dawes doIiverin . speech in which he swears at (Con , grcss. women. men, Congress, old
 fashioned pipes, everybody, Con , grcss.)
 Human interest section: , Gear. chicken, dog, caO whic , adopted brood of young (duck , lions, ants, whales.)
 Latest Paris fashions in (bathin
 suits, ankle watches, bobbed hai
 male escorts)
 Ezra Cloverblossom Of Timothy l field. Nt.. 100 years old, who ascribt his old age to Uobacco smoking, CO fee drinking, rum imbibing, lack (
 sleep, old age)
 Now the scenic section:
 Airplanc trip over (Ait. Nesuviu T Rum Row. Golden Gate. North Pol
 Muscle Shoals) Exclusive views nt y seen elsewhere except in other new
 reels
 0 Patriotic wind-up;
 Remarkable acuon pictu>s D tanks ruining the hlmhr, 70
 Marines staging sham battle. AtlaI ; tic fleet in mid -ocNan.) concludir y with a closeup Of Old Glory.
 x. B.--Ry no means take pictur, n of anything that is news.
 For young man. Attorn, " George Brady Of this city certain g is making himself felt in state ci
 clos. IIo caused one of the bigge {. explosions ever recorded whom l y succeeded in having Motor Nchic g 4ommissioner Robbins B. Stoeck
 sign a gasoline filling station perm
 for his clients, the Doctors o'Co
 n"ll, also Of this city. The commi
 sioner knew Of the law on the ma fl ter; knew he was powerless 10 a
 unless the filling station in questI, e was a danger 10 public safety, al