The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1925-01-15
SMILIN' THRU
BY GEE SEE
THE MORNING AFTER
THE NIGHT BEFORE

OF a self-hating scorn
Like a spite-tolling bell;
And a self-damning thought
That's as bitter as gall!
And the wonder that comes
With this self-scorning pain
Is the yearning to have
1t all over again!
%%sm*s
1t is said that Experience is the
best teacher" Perhaps not the best,
but it is the most expensive.
s*&*ss
Certainly we brag more of our
experiences than we do of our
education.
81 remember the time :"
begins "good fellow" in a crowd,
and then THEY'RE OFF! And if
you stick around you can hear
some awe-inspiring yarns.
#%*#*@
And every fellow present tries to
Guido the other. That's where all
these stories start that cause people
to say, 81 wonder who sits down
and thinks up all these jokesw
***%*s
Evidently most people never en-
joy their experiences so much as
telling about them afterward
*%****
As witness, take the morbid wo-
men who are always Dragging about
the gruesome operations they have
had.
@**#*&
And consider how people love to
recount the trials and tribulations
they have passed thru in their
| climb to success.
s*&t**
1t is reported that French girls
are taking up boxing in order to
develop beautiful figures.
@*****
American girls don't have to go
to such extremes evidently. They
get the same results from necking,
petting, checking, etc, which COM
bine form of massage that gets
the desired results while having a
perfectly gorgeous time" mean
while.
1t is reported that the recent
SHOWS cost New York City two
million (cold) dollars to get it re-
moved from the streets.
&#*&#s
And yet there are darned boobs
who rave about "the beautiful
snow!"
We agree with the newspapers
that it wasn't worth the money.
+*a@&%
New York is the centre of big
financial deals. We've just read that
seat on the Stock Exchange sold
for $101, 100000. Which leads us to
wonder what they'd charge for
iOuNl.
&#&#sk
And if some boob reads this and
comes around to explain to us
what "Stock Exchange seats" are,
We'll brain him with the first bung
starter we can lay our hands onl
&**%*s
A recent newspaper item says,
"The wise driver will always look
both ways when he comes to a
railroad crossing"
We would modestly suggest that
it would take a contortionist, rather
than a wise man, to look both ways
at once.
Have you ever stopped to con-
slider the riot that would be created
if men went into these fashionable
New York restaurants and theatres
dressed as scantily as their wo-
men folks?
Picture the men dressed in
sleeveless shirts with only straps
over the shoulders, their backs bare
almost to the waist, and wearing
trousers that only came to their
knees! They would be arrested for
indecent exposure.
e##~*~
But then mans anatomy doesn't
look as good as the female form
| divine"
As proof of it, Physical Culture
Magazine has for years been ex-
tolling the male torso with pictures
of men clad only in jocky straps
and the like, without creating any
sensation.
But this month a new publica-
ton made its appearance on the
news dealers counters called the
cart Lovers Magazine" 1t was re-
plete. with attractive pictures of
beautiful women in appealing poses,
and they sold like the proverbial
hot cakes.
NssAaa
Mote to Paul Jarrett-There's
no charge for this free advertise
ment)
sA&ARR
We are thinking very seriously of
transforming this paper into pic
ture magazine for the edifcation
of "the female form divine" sand
wiehed with naughty stories of un-
true confessions, We have bunch
we would get rich on such a pub
LEGATION.
aSNssA
A Woodworking editor sweated