San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1925-10-02
Listen, World!
Smearers
BY Elsie Robinson


Gertie is excited over the treat
ment she gets from a Cruel, Hard
World. Can you tell Gertie that every
one appreciates a sweet, friendly spir-
it? You CANNOT. Gertie knows diff
ferent. She's 100000 candlepower
sweet herself and what does 1t GET
her? 1t gets her a pain in the neck.
That's what it gets her. 80
Gertie was the original Little Sun
beam. She started her stuff when she
was about six days old and she's still
going strong at 3S. Loving is her spe-
cialty. She's just dying to be Little
Sister to All the World.
You've heard of people gushing"
Gush is too mild word TO apply to
Gertie. It's like tangling with lovely
fire hose to meet this lady. Her heart
actually busts loose all over the prem
ises. Five seconds after you've intro
duced she has discovered 81 varieties
Of mystic bonds between your twin
souls. In ten minutes she's inform
ing you that sch feels as if she d known
you all her life. Before you part you're
installed as her Most Intimate Friend,
and if ysu thereafter don't live up 10
the part, may the saints protect you.
Now you'd think that a lady like
this would be simply besiegcd with de-
votion by grateful following, wouldn't
you? Then you think wrong. She
isn't. She's the most unpopular person
I knew. She's avoided-even detest-
ed, Strong men crawl under the day.
xr.hA NkA.r
weak, frail women get out the carv-
ing knives.
Take me. for instance. Gcrtie act
ed like two fire hoses when she met
me. She'd read everything I'd writ
ten for years and years. Why, it was
almost as if she'd written it herself.
She Just KNEW that there was
SOMETHING strange, psychic
something-between us or l could mex
er have voiced her very thoughts like
that. Then she began to tell me How
Wonderful j was. She told it to me
with her voice sorta breaking into 4
mournful hay like a melancholy blood
hounds. For ten minutes she kept
it up. Then she reluctantly left me
after making about a dozen dates for
the renewal of our love pact.
She felt she had made a great i'm.
preston on me. She had. Like a
poro's plaster.
Now why should have taken such
dislike to this lady? Am I adverse
10 hearing glad greetings about my
self? / am NOT. 1 am extremely
partial to complimentary conversation
concerning lii Elsie. | can usually
IN <<f
not even above egging them on when
they get started that way.
BUT GERTIE GOT MY GOAT.
She made me feel just as If I'd
stepped on a wad of gum or sat on
chocolate cream. Judging by re-
suits that's the way Gertie makes
most people feel.
Does this seem cruel to the Ger
trudes of the world? Gertie says it's
cruel. But 1t isn't. 1t is simply the
normal, healthy reaction to an abb
normal approach.
Gertie is sincere but she's fooling
herself. She thinks she loves every
one, but she doesn't. It's not possible
TO love everyone you meet. 1t isn't
even possible to love many OF the PEG.
pie you have known for a long time.
1t is not often, possible to merge your
life wholly with even one person, much
less dozens or hundreds.
But it is possible for a weak.
sticky nature to want to attach itself
TO every support that comes along
which is Gertie's desire. She isn't
elf-sufficient--she doesn't know how
to lean on herself-she wants to lean
on each newcomer. And every healthy
nature resents it, just as every
healthy nature resents wood ticks.
flies and other parasites. That's why
folks avoid and dislike Gertie. Her
love is a blister instead of bracer.
Which same is lesson to lot of
gushing hearts that dampcn the land
with floods of unrequited affection.
BE QUIET, ARDENT ONES [!
DON'T SMEAR YOURSELF ALL
OVER THE LANDSCAPE,
Copyright. 1925. King Feature Syn, Inc.