The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1925-09-16
\ With the
IAlibi Artists.
Ia Cross Section of the
Daily Grind in Judge
MacD onaId's Court
Read EN- and Weep
BY DONALD McDOUGAL
One More Chance

Seventh street at New York ave
nue. when ] saw the defendant
up somewhere around L street
and headed for us.
i've got pretty good brakes and
stepped with my front wheels on
the west car track and said, Gee,
that fellows going
my brother, on the rear seat.
looked down toward K street and
yelled, He's gone.
''I heard quite a loud crash ana
looked down there, too. A west
bound w. B. and A. train was
scattering Ford parts along X
street like remember seeing my
father sowing corn when l was
a kid up in Frederick county,
MARYLAND. The chassis was com.
ing to stop down around
street.
men hoped from the wrecKage
like rabbits out OF a brush pie
and I never did see them AGAIN..
The defendant squirmed iroln
under the engine and asked .ne,
'Di' zhu shee THAT? Two Zee.
more an I'd ben perfly snare.
About two feet less and he'd nave
been sausage meat.
What was his condition as 70
sobriety?" oar
.He was the drunkest man
I've sen since prohioition
pened." s...,,. s,,t
couldn't exactly. call nayseA
drunk"
'vrhat train was on my leIt-
had the right of way.
.sYou'd have been lot better
off without it. The sentence OF
"Won't your honor take into
consideration that my car was
You won't need a car any
more. Your permit will be re-
II / could have one more
IF YOU had one more chance
you'd kill somebody. Sixty DAYS
and $780,"
The New Speeder
The court: This man has been
around here for the Iast tWo
hours and halt. Mnat Nc
charged with, Mr.. Clerk
Boob: speeding"
naner AGAINST him, your honor.
"Where were you caughtY
ION der Effenoo.
Glow fast were you going?
"Goingl I didn't vent. vas
ofN
Take a streed car! Weren
you driving?' -.
1 got no car, no permit-ii0u
' And you're charged with
eNot speedfng = speeding.
speeding on der sidewalk.
'.Oh, splitting on the sioewaIk'
You're in the wrong court.
You've probably forfeited your
collateral by this time.
Boob (going out, mumbnngE
"Ain't dot some hell"
Helping Mother
1--WE plead guilty to this charge
of driving while drunk, your
honor. Ny client is GOOD
steady worker, and never mas
been in court before on any
charge, / think this Is a ut
case for probation.
II don't know how serious the
case is-whether he did any
damage
The cop: HE struck a lady at
Seventh and M, your honor, and
she lust came out of the hospital
Yesterday. Her face was cut,
and she barely missed having
her eye put out"
He has a sick mother 10 sup
port"
THAT'S a risky way to support
a sick mother. isn't it?''
IF your honor can be little
lenie1f with him
"No. "I'n have to give him
sentence that will stay with him
for a while
"The trouble is, your honor.
that when he is punished. others
have to suffer, too
"Yes-here's this lady with her
head all bandaged. UP. 1t looks
to me az though she was suffer
ing more than her share"
The lady: 81 have three chill
dren depending on me for support.
your honor"
Furnishing my client won't do
those children any good.
sixty days and 800. I hope
il will do your client some good.
If it doesn't. we've got lots more
days"
He was pulling thirty miles an
hour along Florida avenue from
Ninth TO Twelfth at 1:20 this
morning, your honor. He said
he didn't know he was speed.
ing"
Counsel: HE was in hired
car, your honor, and the speed
ometer was broken, 50 he didn't
know he was running TOO fast"
IF that was a good alibi, every
speedometer in Wa shington
would be out of commission in
side Of a week. $25.
Read 'em and Weep
He was parked ON G street
between Seventeenth and Eight
zenith from $50 to S:35 this morn.
ing. your honor"
Boob: There were so many
cara marked. in from NJ the Mo