davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1925-07-16
Pres. Coolidge Praises
Sabbath Schools

"If this country is to meet sue
cessfully the problems confronting
it today, there must be first of all a
greater recognition of the spiritual
side of life; there must be more
widespread acknowledgment OF
the obligation that we owe to use
our power and strength for the
general welfare and redemption Of
humanity
THE Sabbath Schools furnish
today the great agency by which
these spiritual ideals may be made
a part Of the lives of the younger
generation of Americans, and the
growth OF. the schools will mark
the spread of these principles.
Il wish you every success in any
effort which may strengthen and
build up your Sabbath School AS
ISOLATION
CALVIN COOLIDGE"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1925-07-16
T. D / T o r / A L s
YOU HAVE ONLY YOURSELF TO
BLAME FOR PAYING
HIGH PRICES

Complaint is heard on every hand
against the present high prices of
food stuffs. If you are too digni-
fed to carry market basket, then
don't expect low prices. Or if you
are too lazy to go shopping for your
meats and groceries, then don't
blame the merchant who charges
yu for your service.
But wise people, who don't go
around with chips of false pride on
their shoulders, are thriftily buy
ing at the "cash-and-carry" chain
stores, where the immense quantity
of sales enables the prices to be
the lowest They have no complaint
to make against high prices.
Quantity production always re-
duces the cost of the article pro-
duced. The American Stores Com
pany, it is reported, can prosper if
they only make profit of $100 a
day each in all their stores.
Why? Because they have several
thousand stores and that means
just as many thousand dollars a day
profit as they have stores. That is
the secret of quantity production.
It's another way of saying, Tn
union there is strength" Do you
know of an independent merchant
who can live ON a profit of $10O a
day?
Look for the American Stores gro
Gerry and meat advertisements in
this paper. They appear on page
three every issue. Look them over!
You will be surprised at the unnec-
cssaryily high prices you have been
paying elsewhere.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1925-07-16
TO BE HEALTHY
READ THE COMICS

Washington, d. C.,-The lowly
newspaper comic strip, looked down
upon by the elite and scored by the
highbrows is good thing from
a hygienic standpoint, according
to DIR. Frederick w. Steward, neuro-
logist, who did not hesitate to say
so in recent address. The comic
strip soothes the nerves and puts
us into better temper according to
DIR. Steward.
"People whose ire is easily
aroused, who fly into rage on the
slightest provocation are candidates
for nerve exhaustion and brain fag,"
DIR. Steward said. "a calm, even
temperament is an invaluable health
asset.
~ advise Inconsistencies to look for
the funny side of life. The liberal
sprinkling of our newspapers with
comic strips is decidedly beneficial
thing from a health standpoint"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1925-07-16
AND THEN SHE BEANED HIM

An absent-minded man was deep
in his work when his wife called
out to him:
"Henry! Baby has swallowed all
the ink in the inkpot! Whatever
shall we do?"
write with pencil, suppose"
was the dreamy reply.
-Tit-Bits (London)
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1925-07-16

1t is significant that a foreign boy
was chosen as a typical New York
err" The typical American of to-
morrow would need letter of in
PRODUCTION to the typical Pilgrim
father.-Burlington Free Press.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1925-07-16

In the six years
since the war our
total sa wings de
posits have risen
from S11.600, 000,-
600 to nearly sci,
0O0.000.0 900, an in
crease of some So
100000, 900. The to.
tai number of saw.
ings depositors Is
reported at about
AZ qO0 000
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1925-07-16
IT DID SEEM FUNNY

At Camp Grant, during the I'M
pleasantness, the officers had diff
Guilty in getting the proper salutes
from the men. Lecture followed lee
ture, but apparently to no avail.
A Negro private met captain
one morning and greeted nim with:
"Howdy, boss"
Followed a long TRADE from the
captain on the correct way to sa-
lutte a superior The buck listened
in silence, scratched his head, and
finally replied:
~Lawsy, boss, if Aid thought you
was gwine git so mad about it,
All wouldn't of spoke to you
a-tall."
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1925-07-16
GOING IN TRAINING

There are indications that sena-
tors are getting ready for Dawes
attack when Congress convenes. Sen
ator Harris, of Georgia has had
his tonsils removed.-Memphis Com
mercial Appeal.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1925-07-16

Berlin, N. J.,-And now they have
even got an American Legion Post
in Berlin. A post was formed here
recently but the veterans didn't call
it Berlin" post. They've significant
Iy named it "Long- Post"
"Your choice, gentlemen: A Bit
ter, dependent war wreck; or 10y
al, ambitious and happy workman
who is an asset to his community"
A Legion button had turned the
Pullman smoker talk to the war,
bolshevism, the disabled and The
American Legion.
The speaker, out helping raise
Pennsylvania share of the Legion
endowment fund, has just pointed
out that the rehabilitation of Phil
adelphia boy he cited shows the
Justice and wisdom, as he sees it,
of giving a fair chance to any
man who sacrificed his health in
military service. The endowment
fund will provide permanent means
of assisting the disabled and war
orphans.
The veteran referred to is Robert
| o. Baker, now of Birdsboro, Pa. He
is one of the men granted voca-
.ional training by the U. S. Vet
Grams Bureau.
"There were 349,633 who request
ed similar aid but had to be re-
| iected under the law" the inform
ant glanced at report. at is for
| those and other thousands who,
chiefly through ignorance, did not
ask this help, that the Legion is
now concerned, and is continually
finding and assisting, always in close
conjunction with government agen-
cies if possible"
The conversation developed that
Baker became a bread-winner at
the age of fourteen. He joined the
u. S. Marines April 27, 1917, when
81 years of age, and went overseas,
He escaped injury during the days
of the trenches and shells, but
on Dec. -, 1918, while with the
occupying forces at Coblenz, Ger
many, he had influence. Appendi-
citis developed.
When discharged in June 1919, he
was unable to resume his former
work as blacksmith. He was given
training under government agencies
in mechanical drawing. A recent let
ter from him reads:
81 am with the Birdsboro Steel
J Foundry & Machine Company's En-
gineering department. | started to
work here January 10, and like the
Job very much. 1t was rather tough
for me in the beginning owing to the
fact that | had no experience in
rolling mill work. just had to
grit my teeth and make good. There
is good opportunity for advance
ment here for me, so | am going
to plug like everything and see if
this drafting job doesn't amount to
something in year or two from
now"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1925-07-16
INK FROM OTHER
PRESSES
Humorous and Serious Topics
From Leading Editors
of the Country
IT HAPPENS IN THE BEST
REGULATED FAMILIES

Sof-Joe's awfully absent-minded,
isn't he?
Omar-Why?
"Why, the other night he was
driving his parents over lonely
road and they came to particularly
lonely spot and before he knew
it he had parked the car"
Penn Punch Bowl.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1925-07-16

enth and eighth grades Of the public
schools are released for one hour
each week from their regular school
work and actually go to nearby
churches for religious instruction I'M
der paid teachers who are trained
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1925-07-16
THE NUDE IN HEART

Lots of people
Do not like
Statues and
Paintings of
Figures in the
Nude. But | do.
| don't know why.
l guess it is because
was just born that way.
-,Judpe
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1925-07-16
The Power Behind
The Savings Dollar

BY WILLIAM E. KNOX
President American Bankers Asso-
citation
A recent compilation made by ths
Savings Bank Division OF the Amerf
ian Bankers Association showed that
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1925-07-16

NOW LEGION POST IN BERLIN
Berlin, N. J.,-And now they have
even got an American Legion Post
in Berlin. A post was formed here
recently but the veterans didn't call
it Berlin" post. They've significant
ly named it "Long Post. !"
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1925-07-29

u
partner in America:
iii be with you before grow much older get much
grayer and great and prosperous and peaceful time will
lie before US
Written during the early years Of the this sentence
summarizes the hope Of all
great and peaceful time!
Let mind run back the SIX more since
the close of active hoste Years Of drifting and bungng
and pickering Years Of Versailles Of Corfu and OF the
Ruhr Years of sowing njustices and reapng hatEeds
Looking back the first of this great and
peaceful time the writer only four OF
that have that didn't have before None OF them
is very deastc
They
Mankind had its fill of for the present Lloyd
George published of articles not long After
giving number of for the hope of ne ended
by saying that the chief Of security lay IN
the fact that the world had satisfied mans fighting In
stinct for time to
enlistment been supplanted by the draft
In former times enlistment depended mainly IN
time of Now is the draft In the event OF another
not only adventurous souls seeking excitement VIII CO.
but every young who is fit The result is people
thinking seriously about than before.
g. Modern warfare ism fought with prancng seeds flash
ing swords cavalry charges individual feats Of strength
1t fought muddy trenches with poison and by guns
that kill twenty miles away Most of the d-tme APP
peal of and heradry The gamOr OF the bat
ties ancient Greeks where individual prowess
largely disappeared There is little gamor in longrange
guns governed by mathematics which kill the gunner
a Moreover the last war produced great body Of
literature showing it really s In former times, the
ideas given mainly by those heroes who safely
returned and who looked back 1t the period OF their
greatness During the last the increased volume OF
magazines and books and the greater facilities for
getting and transmitting facts Saner and less APP
peang picture The realistic play, What Price Glory
is one of the results.
These four things seem to be the strongest present
Our problem is to make the best of this period of
respite put the of lasting sounder
basis.
perhaps the great and prosperous and peaceful
time will come in actuality
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1925-07-29
ROUGE AND
A QUARREL
BY Beatrice Fairfax

nEAR MISS FAIRFAX:
~ l am twenty and have been
going about with a nice young
girl for five months. We were
getting along well until 1 made a
remark about her having too much
rouge on her face.
will say I was a little rough
about the way told her.
She refused to speak to me
and wouldn't let me see her
home. What shall l do?
PETER.
w of apology telling her you
are sorry you told her so roughly
about the rouge and later lost
your temper in arguing )ver the
matter. If she cares at all abouZ
you she will be glad to start all
over again with the friendship.
OF course. you may as we'll
make up your mind to endure the
rouge If she chooses to wear il,
and you wish her friendship, for,
after all, it Is her own affair,
isn't it? And, as you are not
even engaged, you haven't the
right to interfere in such per-
sonal matters. However, sus-~
pect that If you are very sweet
about the matter she will voluI.
tarily tone down the rouge a little.
For, if she likes you, she wishes
to keep your good opinion.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1925-07-29
MEDITATIONS/
OF A WIFE
BY Helen Rowland
The Mighty Masculine Stomach

The Mighty Masculine Stomach
HERILY, my daughter, every
woman who is married to a
man is welded to a stomach and
hath signed herself up for a life
job in its service.
For, 10, the household, and like
wise the world, is ruled, not by
the iron masculine hand. but by
the Mighty Masculine Stomach!
Behold there is the Ascetic
Stomach, which causeth a man
to pick his food and sniff thereat
with suspicion. 1t maketh him
refuse the succulent dish, and TO
sneer scornfully at the piece de
resistance wherewith his wife seek-
eth to tempt his appetite and to
invite his supposed soul.
1t causeth every dinner to be-
come a lecture on dietetics, and
each breakfast to be an hour of
anxiety, and each egg suorce
of argument.
And there is the Epicurean
Stomach, which inspireth its pos
SCISSOR TO call for rare and diff
ficult dishes, to invent new reci-
pes, to dream of feasts, and to
find flaws and suggest improve
ments in the cooking; which in
duceth him to eat to the point
of inertia, which bringeth on the
after-dinner headache and the
evening coma.
And there is the Stomach of the
Gourmand. which can Never be
filled, and which prompteth its
owner to snatch mis- food greedlly,
to swallow all within sight, and
to rob the ice-chest an hour after
luncheon. 10, it maketh his wife
to blush before company. 1t lead
eth to embonpoint and sudden
death. 1t is a bottomless pit!
And there is the weak and Dys-
peptic Stomach, which calleth for
rich viands and cannot resist
them, yet suffereth and rebelleth,
and filleth the world with gloom
and grouches and nightmares and
morning-after headaches and VIC
lence.
Verify, verify, there be fifty
seven varieties of Masculine
Stomach, and every one is a diff
ferent kind of pickle and a sepa-
rate problem.
For a woman will cheerfully
lunch upon a stale cracker and a
cup of tea and dine upon left
overs, but a man must be FED!
And many grand passion
hath withered, and many a beau
tiful wifely devotion staleth be-
meath the importunate demands
of the husbandly stomach.
Then, my Daughter, when thou
settest thine heart upon a man,
see to it that thou lowest him well
enough to immediate myself upon
the altar of his appetite.
For, an husbands slogan is al
ways, Love me, love my stom.
achg'
SELAH.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1925-07-29
By ELSIE ROBINSON

her drop out of the basket-b ball
team because they were going to
play in public. And now we are
having the worst time of all be-
cause she wants 10 go out to
parties and theaters with young
men, like her girl friends do. He
says If she does he'll lock her up or
send her way out into the country
to his brother Bert's to live.
The poor child Is getting so
sulky and rebellious about it all.
She won't even tell me how she
feels, because she says l side
with him and I'm at my wits
ends to know what to do. / have
caught her fibbing several times
lately and / know it is because
her father acts so awful. But
what can / do?"
A good many mothers are
facing the same situation and
asking the same question. What
can they do with the Dads who
want 1925 girls to lead 1875 lives?
The first thing to do is to try
and understand WHY Dad raises
so much Cain when daughter
and steps out with the Village
Sheik. Dad sees daughter through
a glamour which doesn't exist to
Ma. To Ma, she's another woman
AN adorable, precious woman,
but SO and 99-100 human never
theless-But to Dad she is an
Immaculate Miracle - something
that does him proud. And 10,
that Immaculate Miracle is about
to be dragged down to the sorbid
level of common humanity by
bobbed-hair and sleeveless dresses
and Sheiks. He resents it, not
only for the Miracles sake but
for his own. There's jealousy as
well as devotion in his indigna-
ton tantrums. There's pathos as
we'll as cussedness in his OBJ
stinate determination to keep
daughter in a glass case.
That determination must be
il by anger, Ma, or by conccit.
Anger and conceit will only firm
him in his opinion that bobbed
hair Is the beginning of all evil.
You must prove to him, BY
YOUR OWN ATTITUDE, that
these changing fashions are only
customs which have nothing to
do with morality. If you, your.
self, stay serene and womanly in
the face of his outburst it may
gradually dawn on him that
woma nliness is not menaced by a
neck shave or a rolled sock. But
II you grow sneaky or hysterical
he will be more than ever sure
that he is right.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1925-07-29
THE AGE OF THIS EARTH
By Garrett P. Seryiss,

By Garrett p. Seryiss,
Noted astronomer and Writer on
Scientific Topics Of Popular
Interest
EOR more than a thousand mil
I lion years this has been an
inhabited globe. For at least
ten thousand million years the
earth itself has been in existence.
though, of course, not during all
that time in the condition in
which we know It. For the
earth, too, has had its evolution.
1t has reached its present form
and state by successive steps.
In its rocks 1t holds its history,
telling plainly the story OF its
Il had a fiery" birth. what
ever the details may have been
whether 1t began as a bit of a
star or as a cast-off nebuIous
ring. Geological soundings bring
up from the depths of time rec
Ords OF an age, below the earliest
fossil bearing stratum, where
metamorphism reigned like a god
of destruction, grinding up mate
rails for the granite and the
basalt, and in that abysn1al grist
were lost the earliest forms of
organic life. But there yet dwell
upon the earth species of Great
ures retaining the shape. ana
characteristics of their ancestors
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1925-07-29

they're the ones that make the
trouble. Take my husband, for
instance"
Ma Harwick then proceeds to
turn the spotlight on hubby. And
you'd be surprised to see what
ructions one middle-aged under
sized, skinny little male can cause
in his Home, Sweet Home. It's
all on account of Dolly. Dolly
is the sole progeny of Ma and Pa
Harwick-age, seventeen-shade,
peaches-eight cylinder speed
1925 model. Which sounds
hectic. but really isn't, according
to Ma.
She's just a sweet, normal
little girl. There isn't a wrong
thought in that child's head.
would trust her anywhere. But
to hear her father take On you'd
think she was a hardened Grim
inal. He says it is because he
loves her, and / suppose it is,
but / almost wish sometimes he
didn't love her quite so much
then perhaps we would have
more peace at home.
'He goes right up in the air
over every little thing she does.
When the hair bobbing craze
arrived, all the girls in her class
had their hair bobbed, and of
course Dolly wanted a bob too. \
didn't just like the idea-she had
such pretty. curly light hair. But
l knew how much it meant to a
girl to do what the other girls
were doing, and after all, it was
her own hair, so s4d she
could. But that night" when
she got back from the barber's,
l wish you could have heard
her father rave. l. had kind
of suspected that he wouldn't
approve, so let her go
without asking him. And you
would have thought that we
had committed. the worst crime
on earth, Elsie. He said things
1 will never forget and the
poor baby cried herself to
sleep.
"Then when they began wear
ing those sleeveless dresses we
had another terrible time. / was
making her a new party dress
and she begged so hard to have
it sleeveless l told her to ask
her father. OF course he said
NO! / put the sleeves in and
tried to make her satisfied with.
it that way. Well the very first
time she wore 1t, the other girls
persuaded her to rip out the
sleeves after she had gone to
the party. And her PA saw her
when she came home that way.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1925-07-29

: on the average, the accumula-
ton of heat from radio-activlty
In the underlying basalt brings
about a cycle of geological
change about every forty million
years The cycle begins with q
period OF relative tranquility Of
the crust, lasting about twenty.
five million years. during which
the heat from radio action gradu-
ally accumulates until 1t becomes
sufficient to transform the basalt
into molten mass.
Then ensues the second period
of the cycle, during which the
continents sink relatively TO the
level OF the ocean, and the latter
inyades their borders and flows
over their lower portions. After
about eight million years the
Neat accumulated in the basalt
during the preceding twenty five
million years is lost by radiation,
the basalt hardens and there
comes on a third period, during
which the continents are uplifted
once more, and powerful hori-,
zontaI compressions produce fold.
ings of the surface into noun
tains and plateaus.
Geological history seems TO con-
tain records of four or five sue
cessive cycles of this kind. The
Alpine phase appears to have eol-
lowed a calm period that began
40, 600, 900 years ago. at the. OPEN
ing of the Triassic age. Back CT
that was the Hercynian phase,
following a quiet period that be-
gan so, 900, 900 years ago, IN the
Devonian age, and so on. Judg-
ing by the forty-million-year meas
ure, we ought to be In the early
part of an era of tranquility, and
the radio boiler will have to work
up the suhterranean temperature
for some two score million years
before the basalt softens again.
This let's North America settle
down into that molten cauldron
beneath with no cooling solace
except from the invading ocean.
We shall have been so long
forgotten by that time that 1t is
not now worth our while TO seek
consolation in the fact that .fter
all, though bearing some creden-
tials from science, what We have
been relating is only speculation.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1925-07-29

erai floor on which the geological
fossil.bearing strata rest consists
OF basaltic rock. This contains
certain average amount OF radio
active mineral In the process
Of disintegration this mineral
produces in a given time a
measured amount of helium AID
Of lead. AT the same time ii
develops in its surroundings a
proportional amount OF heat. On
the basis OF these facts has been
deduced the age of the rock strata
containing a known proportion Of
the products OF radio-activity.
Professor Jolly calculates that,
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1925-07-29

that Inhabited the pr1meval globe
before the pre-Cambrian catas-
trophe. The Cambr1an is the
earliest geological period whose
rocks contain recognizable fos-
sils Those fossils show that
back -afe them must have
stretched vast period of life
evolution The earlier records OF
that evolution are cut off and
lost ground up in the great
metamorphic mill
The most recent information
that we have concerning the age
Of the earth comes from the reve-
lations of radio-activity. The gem
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1925-07-29
ONCE-OVERS
TRuIY GREAT MEN NEVER PUFFED UP

What effect has your advancement had on you?
Are YOU broader just, and unassuming you
pnffed up with great feeling of arrogance and pride?
Really great men the most simple and approachable.
knowing that no matter how far ne may seem to have
advanced there is still much learn the truly big
keeps right acquiring knowledge and has time to
swagger.
Do you ever think how small you when you get into
crowd?
There ism thing about you which commands a bit
more respect than the next
In your factory office you may think you
ror sort man. much better than associates because
you are the who gives orders.
But compared with successful you small
and insgnfcant-a bit of very ordinary clay.
You your little niche may be and this has bred
in you spirit of sefesteem and Importance.
But you are mot SO much."
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1925-07-29

dad is about
II to get his.
Too long. accord.
ing to Mrs. EIar-
wick. has that
gentleman enjoy
ed the sunshine of
this colum n 8
approval. Where
as, IL the truth
were known, he
ought to be get
citing One Good
Knock Daily.
You're always
telling the moth
ers they should
try to understand
the younger gen.
Grafton, the lady
protests. What
a b o u t advising
he fathers t o
do 4 little under
standing? " in e
times out of ten