The Monmouth inquirer., 1925-08-27
Who Loses In the
HoId-Up
By [ BURN
J, 1895. western Newspaper Union.l

TT ALL happened to me because the
\ wife forgot to get a bottle Of ketch-
up for supper.
Nov, Bet" / rallied, You know
very well / can't eat beans without
ketchup. So forgetful, so negligent.
So"
Every wen then, dear. It's only two
blocks to the chain grocery" she sug-
gested sweetly.
And that's how, a few minutes later,
/ happened to find myself staring into
the muzzle Of a six-shooter.
"Shove over next to the bossg'
snapped the masked artilleryman.
Think l want to get cross-eyed trying
to cover you both at onceY
"The company's out just $S45.4S,"
said the grocer, looking ruefully at his
empty cash drawer.
"Yep," / sympathized. 'That bottle
Of ketchup cost me just forty-two dol
lars.'
What a nuisance it is to be a good
citizenI Every evening for the next
week or so 1 was called to various
police stations to identify, If possible,
among the recently arrested. our par
ticular can~non-juggler.
Dear" said my wife. when | had
returned from my latest nightly failure,
1--WE a big surprise for you" and
handed me my stolen wallet with not
nj of the forty-two dollars missing.
"Someone rang the bell thrust 1t
into my hand and disappeared before
1 had a chance to see who it was" b
smiled.
"Plain as day." I said. ''This hold-up
artist is a wise little boy. He's afraid
of being caught and identified by me,
and so ne thought he ought to buy
me off. But that reminds me-Iye
never paid for that ketchup."
/ was surprised, on entering b
grocery store, to see my old lieutenant,
Wolfert, in earnest conversation with
the managers. After mutual greetings
and inquiries, during which | learned
that the ex-lieutenant was now a sales
man for the Excelsior Burglary Insur-
ance company, / told them of the re
turn of my wallet.
That's great stuff !" exclaimed Vol
fert. "And / was just telling Mr..
Schulz that he needn't worry about the
loss of that money. because I've sue
ceeded in convincing his corporation
to take a blanket insurance policy on
all their stores throughout the coun-
try. AS part of the transaction we
have agreed to make good their recent
loss. It'll mean lots Of publicity for
us; plenty of advertising"
It was only after ! had returned
home and we had finished supper that
/ recalled having neglected to give the
lieutenant my address. At this mo-
ment our doorbell rang, and before
we had a chance to move we heard the
door opened and banged shut, and q
masked figure dashed into u room.
lieutenant y I gasped. And in my
excitement the only thing / could say
was. How did you find out my adj
dress?"
Quick !" he snapped. "Get out your
checkers. Lively now! Set 'em up"
Just as if he was ordering squads
right"
And 1 obeyed without question.
The doorbell rang. Somebody
knocked.
Don't forget" said Wolfert. as 1
went to open the door, I've been here
a couple of hours"
When / opened that door and saw
those two burly, misunderstanding
policemen before me, | almost lost all
my nerve, and the lieutenant took COM
mand Of the situation.
Right this way, officers" he called.
IF, as / imagine. you're chasing some
one."
"surel" replied one OF the policemen.
"a gun-manr'
what was the yell in hereT asked
the other.
"The woman heard a noise at the
kitchen window. Someone climbing
down the fire escape" Wolfert an
swered promptly.
One Of the officers dashed into the
: kitchen and out on the fire escape; the
other ran out the door.
Of course the chase was unSuccesS-
full and soon Wolfert and l were facing
each other, in silence.
My musings were interrupted by the
lieutenant taking out of his pocket a
roll of bills. Calmly, deliberately. he
began counting.
These Hadden bakeries do a pretty
good business. all right" he remarked.
"You have no kick coming yourself
| joked. ,"But you might have gotten
me into a fine mess" I added serious
". You're the last person in the
world I've have suspected Of robbery
wait; not so fastl |" he interrupted.
you can't say that"
Didn't you hold up the Haddon
place and take their money! / asked
my anger rising.
Eyes," he replied calmly. "And 1
held up Schulz and your ownself not
so very long ago."
'Manl" / exclaimed. '.Are you mad?'
Whats the matter with you. any