New Britain herald., 1925-08-01

one, made of wood and didn't ey- pose no more of the human body than d pair of oVeralls Five min utes after l went on that beach l was follered around by the biggest crowd what ever was seed, They thought l wa sadvertisin' somethin'. l guess, Well. by gosh, that there suit stayed with me right through the week. If 1t were good enough fer Lake Erie. If were good enough fer that there Red skins Neck beach.
 After I'd been down there on the beach for 10 minutes, Gas as red ss beet. and 1t weren't from the sun burn neither. The way them young folks carrys on nowadays Is s0methin' scandelous. The bathin' ' suits is awful and was plumb thankful that Mother weren't there 10 see it Them suits. especially on the gals, was the skmpiest things thought I was advertisin' somethin', shockin', I had half a mind to go back 10 the cottage, but l sez to my seIf Lige. them women ain't agoin' to scare you off the beach and by zooks they didn't, l stayed there til the last one left
 "At dinner time I was thinkIn' that they would have a real nice Christian meal. I set down and got all ready fer the blessin 10 be of- farpI n,I I ua n,Toitini t hat young whippersnapper. singed out, Hey, grandpop, are you agoin' 10 marry the butter" I don't know what put sech ideas into his head. but I passed the butter to him, as that's what he seemed to expect me 10 do. l didn't have much time to figger what was goin' on, cause they was too much noise.
 "One feller next 10 me sez, Last night l got ahold of some terrible sin and It purity near knocked me out A feller on the other side of the table was talkin' about intoXi- eating liquors, guess, and he kept on saying that they wasn't nobody on the beach what could drink as much as he could and stand up. One of them gals she pipes up and sez she could and they was agoin' out that night and See, what one was right,
 'The evenin's was terrible. was all fer sittin' on the porch and talkin' 10 some of them young peo- pie. A gal and 8, young feIler was sttin' there in the dark and so went over to 'em and I sez, Well, it's a nice night' The young feller pipes back with We'll they ain't mo- body sed 1t wasn't!' He seemed rather bashful at meetin' stranger. so l started out to set him right. Right in the middle of tellin' em about what I'd done that day, the feiler sez, Come on. let's get out of here and go where they ain't no old l frogs hangin' around I took by that remark that he was afraid of frogs, so I left him alone and went
 T offered to turn on the porch although I didn't know they was any frogs around them parts.
 T offered 10 turn nthe porch light for another young couple what was sittin' in the dark, but they sez. Get out of here'' so I got. They wasn't very friendly.
 Well, to make long story short, l spent most of my evenn's in bed, but didn't sleep more than two or three hours, with all the noise what was agoin' on outside. Some of them young folks stays up all night, I guess.
 'I got one good thing out of that trip what won't ferget and that is a attack of poison ivy and sum- burn. When I fust got that sun- i burn, I used to lay down standin' up when I went to bed nights.
 Next year I'm agoin' to take my vacation in a nice quiet violent ward at some asylum. The folks there acts more sensible"