The Monmouth inquirer. [volume] (Freehold, N.J.) 1865-1933, 1925-05-07

raise more different kinds of Gehenna
around a peaceful home than that
same poor, dear mamma Of yours, I'd
like to have nfe-size pasted OF"
She-"How dare you talk about my
mother in that manner, after al the
trouble she's had"
He-''Ye-eh, trouble. II there's any
kind of trouble that she hasn't started
around here, I'd like to have the blue
prints to see what"
She-''You shanE scandalize her
that way, so there now! It's a per-
feet s-s-shame the w-w-way y-y-you
c-c-carry on w-w-when T."
Here the tactless wife begins to
dab at her eyes with a little wad Of
a pocket handkerchief, and the whole
situation is just the mess and the hash
that the tactless wife foredoomed 1t
to be from the minute she fired her
opening gun.
The tactful wife does it quite diff
ferently. When he comes from the
Office he finds her seated, in an OBJ
viously distressed frame of mind, with
a just-received letter in her lap.
Then something like this conversation
ensues:
What's up? Who's the letter
from?"
she-"Oh, never mind, dear. It's
nothing important Don't bother
about it,"
He-'I know, but YOU look kind o.
blue What's the answer"
She -"Oh, well. I'll just write her
and tell her that"
He-"Write who, and tell her
what?"
She Now, my dear, don't want
to get you all disturbed, for / know
how hard you're working lately,
Anyhow, I've got lovely shad for
dinner, and I'll tell you after dinner
what"
He-~Oh. say, cut that-I'm more
than seven years old. What's your
mother got to say in the letter."
She-"Oh, we'll, If you must know,
she's coming to Virginia, and then
but never mind, I'll write to her and
tell her that"
He-"Oh. she's coming here, you
mean?"
She Eyes, that's what she writes.
but I'm not going to have you put
out, the way you feel about the poor
old dear, and"
He-"Oh, l dunno. / guess can
stand the gait all right. How longs
she going to linger?"
She -"Oh, she doesn't say, but
listen, my dear, simply will not
consent to it thst you be made
nervous and unhappy by mamma COM
ing here when / know SO we'll that
you-well, that you are not particu-
larly fond of her, and that's not to
be expected, ! know, for it's natural
that men should have a certain feeling
about their mothersdn-law, / suppose.
and so I'll write to her and tell her
-"
He-"Look here, l never said that
l was down on your mother. Where
did you ever pick UP that notioni
OF course, she's kind O. cranky and
peevish, and all that, but"
She-"But, dear, you know what
you said the last time she was here
that she got on your nerves, and all
that, and my home is everything to
me, and I'm not going to have your
comfort disturbed in the least by"
He-"Say, look here, don't try to
toss everything on me that way.
don't believe you want her to come
yourself You seem to be trying to
call her visit off mighty hard, and
She "Oh, John. you know that !
want her, but / was only thinking
about those little cross moments that
she has, and you"
He-'0Well, know all about that,
but it's natural for old folks to be
little crusty, and If you"
She Well, if you aren't the old
dear? Do you mean to say that I'm
to write mamma that she Is to come.
and that everything will be lovely,
and that you are just as anxious
He Sure Tell the old girl any
thing you like. rye got nothing
against her Fact is, I'd kind o. like
to have her around for spell, and
this is the season for her to see
Washington, and l guess we won't
have any kick-ups. III do my part
and be good. anyhow. Gee! Smell
that shad! / guess that's the aromat
Let's go down and get at those eats
right away" ETC., etc. etc.
1rh ono q 10 mora xuouc 0f e1a11trhtar-
ing an objectionable feline than shoot
ing it in the left ear with blunder-
buss loaded with slugs and nails
Washington Star.
What's In a Name7
csr,,;4l rrrioIde. q VARY clouar hr1lah