The Lambertville record., 1925-12-03
SMILIN' THU
BY GORDON COOPER
Copyright 1925 by Gordon Cooper
AND HE GOT AWAY
FROM THAT PLACE.

Dean Vendors was the only mem
Der of the faculty of Mercer Uni
versity whose opinion of Doc Bloom,
the campus gardner, was decidedly
uncomplimentary He emerged from
the Administration Building for the
seventh time on the particular morn
ing in question and started search
for that estimable colored gentle
man, whose Sunday avocation was
pastor of the Antioch African Bap-
tist Church, South.
He had searched for Doc all morn
ing without finding him. And his
temper wasn't at all congenial as
he started the new search. But this
time he found him. He first spied
him as he was clambering out of
a car driven by one of the students,
and the tone in which he called to
him was strident with displeasure.
"Bloom! I've been trying to find
you all morning! That shipment of
shrubs has arrived at the express
office, and they phoned that they
were badly wilted. | want you to go
down and get them Immediately be-
fore they all die What do you mean
by leaving the campus without my
permission ?"
"Aw now, Perfesser," Doc started
in wheeding tone, "cain't a po'
nigger git mint ter hab a liz
fun?"
"You are not being paid to have
fun" returned Dean Vendors sharp
ly "And if those shrubs die I'm GO
ing to deduct the cost of them from
your pay!"
Docs genial grin disappeared. "Aw
now, Perfesser, All doan make enuuff
in six mont's ter pay fer dem
shrubs Yo' could-a got somebody
else ter git 'em frum de 'spress
office, an by turnin' de hose on EN-
dey would-a been all right"
"That's enoughl' returned the
Dean sternly. "Now get move on
you"
But just then Professor Mount APP
peared, and when he saw Doc he
called out, "Well, how did you
make out ?"
Docs grin returned. He imme-
diately forgot the Dean, and turn
ing to Professor Mount he replied,
"Perfesser, All mos nearly LATED
nah haid off Dat nigger wuZ so
funny on de witness stan dat de
whole cote room wuz laffin' fit ter
kill"
Dean Vendors tried to interrupt.
"Never mind about that! You get
yourself down to the express office
as quickly as you cani"
But Professor Mount stopped him.
"Wait moment, Dean" he inter
posed good -humoredly, "Ive got to
hear this story. told Doc to leave
this morning-he wanted to hear
that trial in the suit of the vaude-
vile company against the drug store
whose clerk killed their trained tiger
last winter when it escaped. You
may remember that the tiger wap-
dered into the drug store where he
was shot. The porter in the drug
store is a member of Docs church,
and he was anxious to hear his tes-
timony." And then turning to Doc,
"What did he have to say?"
Doc chuckled at the remembrance.
"Well, de fus' thing dey axed i'm
wuz, 'Whar wuz yo' wen de tagger
come in?'
can Sam say e wuz down on lis
knees in frunt o. de sody fount pol
ishin' de brass rail. An e say dat
wen e hyah de commotion e look
up an dar wuz de tagger wild is
tongue hangin' out an breathin'
right in is face"
"Den de lawyer AK i'm who wuz
hit shot de tagger. An Sam say dat
hit wuz Mister Grace, de sody clerk.
An de lawyer AK i'm how many
times did e shoot de tagger. An
Sam say two times-bang! bang!
quick, jes' like dat!"
"An de lawyer say, AN yo' wuz
down on de flo on yo' knees wen de
shootin' took place ?"
"An' dat's de time Sam made
evebody laff! Cause e answer,
'Yassuh! Leastwise All wuz down on
de flo on nah knees wen de fus'
shot went off, but All didn't stay
darl All jumps right ober dat tagger,
an by de time de secun' shot went
off All wuz turnin' de corner two
blocks erwayl'"
"Lawdy! Yo' oughta hyahed 'em
laffl Cause everybody could jes' pic
tur' dat nigger runnin' so fas' dat