davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Evening star., 1925-08-31
THIS AND THAT
BY CHARLES E. TRACEWELL.

What is the biggest moneys worth
i'm the world?
No two will agree upon the answer
but, il You ask me, l. unhesitatingly
reply:
A back -scratcher,
Where can you gel as much for i;
cents as in one OF these little ivory
hands attached to the end of long
slender wand?
In some shops the price may be as
much as % cents, two bits" two thir
dimes and q nickel, but, at any price
the conirivance would be more thar
worth the money.
A back -scratcher is something yot
may not need once month, but wheI
you need IL. YOU need it bad.
a contortionist. of course, might
find no necessity for an implement
wherewith to ply the cuticle on the
small of the back.
Most of US. however, are not con-
tortionists.
We are just ordinary folk who car
neither juggle lamps nor stand on oul
heads. Yet our backs itch just the
same as the dorsal section of the con
tortionist
The handy back scratcher puts one
on an equal with all the contortion
lists thai ever lived. With this too
we can scratch our back to our backs
content. and at the same time obey
Emerson Injunction as TO sef-re-
lance.
After all. every one must be master
of his own back, as well as captain ol
his own soul
1t is almost an axiom that no one
else can scratch your back as well ar
you can do IL yourself.
Not even your wife tor husband, aE
the case may be-.
This is one task the Lord will not
allow ny one TO escape. 1t is an i'm
muta.,ie duty levied against the lazi
ness of mankind.
Kind parents may do everything in
the world for Johnny, but there is one
thing they cannot do. and that is
scratch the middle of his back wher
il itches.
Johnny has to scratch his own.
Attempts are often made 20 take
over this duty for some one else
They end, however. in complete fail
ure. All the motions are gone
through with. but somehow. tht
tickling in the back continues as
great as ever.
The ancient peoples, it seems to me
trouble when they caused a skeleton
TO be brought in at their feasts to
remind them of their mortality
An itching back would have served
the trick just as we'll
Honest Fido shares this grievance
with us, and If we could emulate the
action of his hind leg, perhaps we
would find no necessity for a mechan
ica1 back k-scratcher.
Not being blessed with Fide's SUP
pleness, or the dexterity OF honest
Tom, who scratches from any posi-
ton, we must fall back on the tiny
carved hand of ivory or bone on the
end of q stick.
\ \
whoever invented the back k-scratchel
deserves vote of tharks. In the
name of itching human nifty, then. lei
us unanimously adopt the following
resolutions:
Whereas God created both the
skin and the bones, and the blood
vessels thereof, and also a certain
Utilization of the skin commonly
known as itching;
And whereas in His providence
Evening star., 1925-08-31

He made every man captain of his
soul, but not even his wife master of
his back;
And whereas He created ma n
neither in the shape of a contortion-
ist, nor gave him the handy hind legs
of the domestic dog or cat, nor the
| necessary pawterity of the same;
Therefore, be it Resolved, That
all men and sundry give thanks to
the unknown genius who invented
the back-scratcher, at one and the
same time a work of art and neces-
sity of life, and also to the modern
craftsmen who make them at SO rea-
sonable a price.
There you are, my boy, and / thank
you, too.
China or japan ought to swell with
pride upon reading those resolutions.
Most OF the back -Scratchers are made
in the latter country, l believe, but
on the theory that everything in the
world was first invented in China, /
have included her in the list of lands
which may claim the honor of having
tion-of itching.
Itching. it may be stated offha nd,
is a blamed nuisance.
Plenty of water and soap will cut
| down the amount of itching TO a
| minimum, with two exceptions:
i. That caused by mosquitoes.
2. In the middle of the back.
Itching is mystery at best, but
itching in the middle OF the back is
utterly beyond hope of human solu-
ton.
Why one ever itches there no one
knows, and when one will, no man
can say.
1t comes upon one at the most un-
expected times and places. Men have
been known to suddenly take on A
frantic expression while attending a
swell reception.
The trouble was in the middle of
! the back,
A dress suit, with its boiled or pleat-
ed shirt. wing collar, neat bow tie.
etc, makes 1t impossible for the vic
tim to reach the seat of the trouble,
to say nothing of the fact that he
would not dare to make the attempt
| under the circumstances.
! k* *
In the privacy of the home the little
blessing called a back -scratcher may
be welded with impunity. gusto and
a few other assorted qualities.
What clever little trick IL is, TO be
sure,
Just A bit Of bone. with four claw
| like fingers" aided and abetted by a
! thumb" that is there mostly as a
| guide. since il does not scratch: and
this hand fastened to a slender stick
! about a foot and half long.
There is even q bit of string to
| hang the scratcher to the bedpost.
In use it is held in either of two
/ positions. up or down. Sometimes the
exact spot of itching is just above the
! shoulder blade. In that case the
scratcher is held aloft and then plung-
| ed downward.
| II the itching is just below the
| blade it may be necessary to reach up.
| From any angle, however, it sure
| does hit the spot
| You cannot fail with a back,
| scratcher.
1t does its duty quietly, gently, yet
with such infinite persuasion that
after a few seconds the base itching
| is squelched for-well, il may be to-
day and it may be tomorrow, or It
may be next month, or not until a
| year hence.
Aye, a good thing is the back.
scratcher, II requires no upkeep. and
when you want il, it is right there
waiting for you.
Evening star., 1925-08-31

extent. according to another Southern
banker, Frank Hayden, president OF
the Union & Planters Bank q Trust
Co., who says: THE chief need of
business. as 1 view 1t, is stable prices. -
Business needs further relief from
the burdens of taxation--National
State and local." responds A. F. Daw-
son, president of the First National
Bank of Davenport, Iowa. Congress
should keep its hands off legitimate
business" suggests President Rome C..
Stephenson of the st. Joseph Loan &
Trust Co. of South Bend, Ind, an
idea shared by G. A. Chapman, presi-
dent of the First National Bank of
Rochester, Mimi, who says: I'VE need
to trek back to the basis OF individual
productive toll and cease to look, as
we have come to do during and after
the war, to the public crib for our
credit and sustenance. To this END
there should be a general campaign
of democratic discussion, formed in
the classroom, from the pulpit and
| Through the press, to cultivate indi.
vidual initiative and individual Gre
ative effort"
Good old-fashioned hard work plus
cordiality in all our dealings is what
we need to get more prosperity, In the
view of Alex Dunbar, vice president
of the Bank of Pittsburgh, Pa, while
the whole answer Is summed up by
President A. E. Adams of the First
National Bank of Youngstown, Ohio.
| in two words, as follows: Common
sense"
tcessy.Khs. lsss3
Evening star., 1925-08-31
SHOOTING STARS.
BY PHUANDF6 JOHNSON.
Why Worry?

Why Worry?
We read about the debts which va.
rious nations have to pay.
It's plain that bales of cash must be
unfurled.
Much of it is hid away but it's com.
forting to say
There's an awful lot of money in
the world.
$50, let's be up and doing with a
heart for any fate
Though Fortunes wheel adversely
has been whiried.
1t may strike another gait il you toll
along and wait
There's an awful lot OF money In
the world!
Evening star., 1925-08-31
ANSWERS TO QUESTIONS
BY FREDERIC J. HASKIN.

fleas themselves in turn have greater
heas to go on. While these again
have greater still and greater still
and so on"
Q What kind of wood is used for
cigar boxes?-R. T. S.
! A The following woods are used
for cigar boxes: Tupelo gum, red
wood Eastwood, yellow poplar. Span
| ish cedar. sap gum and red gum.
These species are listed in the order
of quantity used. For many years
the best cigar boxes were made from
Spanish cedar. However, within the
past few years a number of these
other woods have been substituted
for Spanish cedar.
Q. Counting the dead since the be-
ginning of mankind. are there more
people dead than living?-E. r.
a. Sir Thomas Browne, writing in
the seventeenth century. said: THE
number of the dead far exceed the
living"
Q. Do grizzly bears occur in the
United States at the present time?
C. X.
A Aside from the California spe-
cies, they are still found in several OF
the Western States, notably Arizona,
latest report from Yellowstone Ma
tionai Park states there are approx
imately so grizzlies living at the pres
ent time in the park.
@. How do taxidermists remove
the flesh from tiny animals when the
skeleton is wanted?-T. W.
a. Usually ants are allowed TO eat
away the flesh.
@. How many governments are
there in the world, and how many are
administered by presidents?-G. A. G.
\. A recent estimate states that
there are now SO governments in the
world and of these IS are ruled by
presidents, including provisional pres
idents and presidents of Senates that
are heads of States.
Q Who was the first woman to
| fy?-A. n. S.
A. A French woman, Nine
| Tible, was passenger in a mont
golfer" balloon at Lyon in 1854. This
is the first recorded ascent by
woman.
@ Was whisky ever used as a me
! dunn Of exchange in the United
| States?-S. S.
| A After the collapse of the Con
a reversion TO the practice of barter
and whisky was used as 2 measure
| of value, particularly in South Caro-
| lima.
| Any reader can get the dHSJrer To
| any question By GCritiHg The Star In
! formation Bureau, Frederic j. HGskin.
! director, Washington, d. c. This offer
/ applies strictly to information The
! bureau cannot give dduice on legal.
medical and financial matters. 1t does
not attempt TO settle domestic troubles
nor undertake c1hduStive research on
4 amp subject Write your question
| plainly and briefly GiUe fuH name
! and address aud ircIose 2 cents ia
! stamps for return postage. All re-
/ plies are sent direct to the inquirer
Address The StGr Information Bureau.
! Frederic J. HdsktH, director, TtCenty-
! first and streets northtCeSt.)
Evening star., 1925-08-31

@. Was Walter johnson given
credit officially with pitching no.
hit game when he set st. Louis down
without a hit for seven innings last
year?-M. a. NJ.
A. He was not given credit for a
no-hit game because of the fact that
1t was not a nine-inning game.
Q. Is altar of roses made in this
country?-T. E. B.
A. 1t is not produced commercially
in the United States. 1t is chiefly
produced in Bulgaria and in France
and to some extent in India. Altar
Of roses Is used principally for per-
fumery purposes, the water remain
ing after the oil distillation being
called rose water. This latter product
Is largely used for culinary purposes.
Q. Is 1t true that the Chinese eat
the tea leaves and throw away the
liquid?-G. +. d.
A. AS a generalization this is not
true. But there is a virgin tea called
Lung. 500, meaning dragons s whisk ers,
which the Chinese use in making tea
and the leaves of which they eat as
salad.
@. What is punch firing?-J. z. r.
A. 1t is a system of firing the
tendons of a horse. The iron is
heated TO a burning point and then
jabbed or punched on the tendon.
Q. Is a red dress warmer than q
white one made of the same ma.
terial?-B. p.
A. The comparative warmth of
different colors is determined by the
number OF rays of light they can alb
sorb. Red is warmer because il alb
serbs a greater number than any
true color; white absorbs practically
none.
Q. Who are the Calendar Brethren?
e. p.
A. This religious society, once
prominent, exists now only in Bruins
wick. AS it's name suggests, it's
meetings are always held on the
kalends, the first day Of the month.
Q. What will keep cottonwood
trees from shedding?-L. NJ. NJ.
A. The Bureau of Plant Industry
says that any cure for preventing
cottonwood trees from shedding
would kill the trees
Q. II the earth turned on it's axis
same length?-M. w
A. The Naval Observatory says
that the earth rotates on its axis in
the same direction that il revolve:
around the sun. Looked at from
above the North Pole, this direction
is opposite TO that OF the hands of q
| watch. If either of the two motions
were reversed, the other remaining
the same, there would be two more
days in a year than there actually
are.
@. Who wrote the poem about
every insect preyinG upon anothe,
| which runs, little fleas have lesser
| fleas," c.?-S. d.
A. The poem was written by Dear
Swift. Augustus Morgan published
this version of it in a Budget of Par
adoxes: Greater fleas have little fieas
upon their backs to bite EN-. Ant
little fieas have lesser feas and Sc
on, ad infinitum. And the greater
Evening star., 1925-08-31

Florida authorities find themselves
compelled to investigate charges that
prisoners on parole practice bootleg
ging. In an atmosphere of so much
financial enterprise the man with
limited time and capital is tempted to
console himself Illegally for his lack
of opportunity to get into the real
estate business.
Evening star., 1925-08-31

The Prince of Wales denies rumors
that he is growing fat. This does
away with fears that in addition to
wide trousers fashion may demand an
expansive waist line.
Evening star., 1925-08-31

Waldorf, Md, authorities declare
that they welcome District of Column
bia motorists. After collecting speed
fines they are at least polite enough
to say Thank you
Evening star., 1925-08-31
Deficient Drivers.

From the Kansas City Star.
TOO many motorists nowadays
can spell go, but can't spell stop" a
Detroit judge says. Which may be a
result of having eight cylinders in the
engine and only four wheels with
brakes on.
Evening star., 1925-08-31

A coal strike which will not inter.
fere with a regular supply to the ulti-
mate consumer represents one of the
greatest of modern improvements.
Evening star., 1925-08-31

Caillaux by his preliminary remarks
indicates a courteous intention to
break the bad news as gently as pos
sible.
Evening star., 1925-08-31
A Fellow Feeling.

4
You have always expressed great
sympathy for the farmer
Naturally" answered Senator Sor-
ghum. Il have a strong fellow feel
ing for the agriculturist who never
knows how his hard work during the
Summer is going to turn out when
he reckons up in the Fall. It's the
same way with politician"
Evening star., 1925-08-31

Peace has victories as well a. war.
on NJ. Caillaux as a financial strateyist.
Evening star., 1925-08-31

Airship dashes for the Pole are
fascinating in interest, but a non stop
fight TO Hawaii is an experiment with
more practical possibilities.
Evening star., 1925-08-31
Swift Work.

You never hear OF the gold cure
any more
The kind of Ticker now in circuIa-
tion doesn't leave any chance for the
gold cure. 1t lands man in the
cemetery before he has a chance to
get to the sanitarium.''
Evening star., 1925-08-31

Although a secret society, the k. K.
K. shows a keen appreciation of the
advantages of publicity.
Evening star., 1925-08-31
Cruel loneliness.

The blossom so gay
Has proved a deceiver.
That flower, they say,
Produces hay fever.
Evening star., 1925-08-31
Kate by Mail-Payable in Advance.
MARYLAND and Virginia.
All Other States.
Member of the Associated Press.

:, THE Associated Press is exclusively entitled
10 the use for republiCatiun of all news dis
matches credited to il or not utheruIse cred
tied in this paper and also the loc5l news
puhiehed herein. All RIGHTS of publicatlon
Of specisl dispatches herein are also reserved
Evening star., 1925-08-31
On to Washington.

We are a city large and fine
Where motors stand for miles in line
AS men approach from every land
To lend the Government hand.
They once expected pomp and show.
Now their demands much slighter
grow.
Where once they claimed lofty place
They're now content with parking
space.
1T ought to be easy" said Uncle
Eben. Ito lead a safe and peaceable
life. All you really has To do is 10
mind de Ten Comma ndments an de
trashc sigma"
Evening star., 1925-08-31

This Evening Star, with the Sunday morn
EE edition. is delivered by carriers within
tae city at 90 cents per month; daily only
20 gents per month: Sunday only. 30 cents
per month. Orders may he sent by mail or
telephone Main 5000 Collection Is nIalfe oy
,carrAer at the end OF each month.
Evening star., 1925-08-31

Jud Tunkins says he knows people
who make themselves miserable try
ing to look as if they were having a
wonderful time.
Evening star., 1925-08-31

@. How do taxidermists remove
the flesh from tiny animals when the
skeleton is wanted?-T. W.
a. Usually ants are allowed TO eat
away the flesh.
Evening star., 1925-08-31
The Evening Star Newspaper Company

THBoDoRE W. MOVES. =. Editor
Smyrna times., 1925-12-23
$4,000 FOR SMYRNA TURKEYS
More Than $4,000 Pounds of Birds
Shipped from Smyrna TO Citv NIarl,ats |

More Than $4,000 Pounds of Birds
Shipped from Smyrna to City Markets
More than six thousand pounds of
turkeys were shipped from Smvina
the past week or two and the turkey
raisers of this vicinity have been paid
the munifcent sum of over 100000
all of which has ben put in circuIa-
ton in this community. J. R. Fran
els, Jr., shipped about 5000 pounds Of
turkeys; Harold J. Calrow shipped
out 10000 pounds of turkeys. while
Harry T. Greenwell shipped alone
$4,000 pounds. The GreenwelI lot was
trucked to Philadelphia by Vernon H.
Westfall for A. II. Bonsor & Brother
at the Reading Terminal. Most all
of the birds shipped out of Smy1na
have been fine. Messrs. Francis and
Carrow have also shipped large lot
of chickens, ducks and geese. High
est market prices prevailed.
Smyrna times., 1925-12-23
WHOLE NO. 3717
CHRISTMAS MUSIC AT AsBURY
WlIi Feature Services at Methodist
Episcopal Church Next Sunday
Morning-Pageant in the Evening

One Of the best Christmas nro-
grams ever rendered at Ayburv Nn4b-
odist Episcopal Church VIII he ofven
Sunday morning next. Choir direc-
tor Walter O. Hofecker. and 1T,g
Marion Coveriale organist, are ar
ranging a number of anthems which
will be sung by an augmented cboi,.
Inc church auditorium will be decor
ated with evergreens and flowers and
the pastor, the Rev. R.K. Stephenson
u. d., will bring a special MESSAGE
IN ms sermon on "The Gift of Cor
Love to the World" In the a,anipo.
there will be more Christmas ons:c
and instead of the regular church
service their viii be a Christmas
Pageant rendered under the auspices
OF the Epworth League of Asburv NJ.
Z. Church. The choir anthems are
Hsted as follows: Morning-"Tbis i
Christmas Time" (Robertson); "Tbe
Star in the East, (StultsD; "Tbe SONG
OF the Angels" (Stults); Evening
Inc Holy Night" (Mueller); Mrs.
Marion Coverdale will play two spec
lal organ numbers during the offer
tory' morning and evening. The an
thems will have several solo and duet
parts. On Christmas morning the
only service for the day at Asburv
church will be a Candle Service,
Ih!s service will take place at $50
o clock Christmas morning and as it
IS somewhat novel and out of the or
dnary' a larger congregation is ex-
Pected. The pastor, the Rev. DR.
stephenson, desires all who will to
bring a candle stick and candle to he
used in the service.
Smyrna times., 1925-12-23
w. G. ROE HEADS GRANGE
Elected Master at Its Recent Regular
Meetng-Mrs.W. H. Armstronu Soc

Elected Master at Its Recent Regular
Meeting-Mrs.W. H. Armstronr Soc
smyrna Grange, No. p. at its rec
ent monthly meeting held its annual
election Of officers for the ensnino,
year as follows: Worthy Master. Wl77
Il. Roe; Overseer, ME. Mofitt. Stew.
ard, George Johnson; Lecturer. Mrs
NJ. L. MOfitt; Chaplain, E. I.atta.
Secretary, ; Mrs. William Armstrong.
Treasurer, W. Massey; Assistant
Steward, William Armstrong; Cafe
Keeper, Sadie Stevenson; Ceres. Mrs
William Roe; Pomona, Elva Steven
son; Flora, Mrs. Cantwell; Lady As
Sistant Steward, Mrs. Frank Moon
som. Saturday, December 18th.
very interesting session was held. he
ing a debate on Should the Whipping
Post IN Delaware be abolished"
Smyrna times., 1925-12-23
Mrs. ]. Harry Watson LOSES Mother
SMYRNA HIGH SCHOOL PAPER
"The Spy Glass" Which Will be Is
sued Now and Then Makes a Hit

Smyrna High Schools new paper,
"The Spy Glass;" made its appear
ance last week and is a creditable
production. The first issue was a
Christmas number, and contains much
of interest to pupils including editor
ials, original contributions. school
news, hits, jokes, etc. There will be
two other editions, one at Easter and
the other at commencement. The
staff follows: Ruth Collins. '26 and
Elizabeth Hill '26, associate editors:
Wilds Donovan, '26, business man
ager; Franklin Staats, '26, assistant
business manager; Corinne Shaplev.
ri, and Cunmins Speal1man, Jr., '29.
literary editors; Anna Sklut, '27, girls
Allen Bennett, '26, bows
athletics; Rebecca Williams, '27 and
Sara Pratt, '29, joke editors; Eliza
beth KINNEY, '26, senior reporter;
Bessie Cook, '27, junior reporter;
Henry Price, '28, sophomore reporter:
Ethel David, 20, freshmen reporter:
Norma Coleman, 80, eighth grade re-
porter; Helen Harmonson, 81, sew
enth grade reporters; Miss Bessie
Matthews, elementary reporter; Miss
|. E. Stiff, Miss A. B. Beckett and Mr..
Kenyon, advisory board.
Smyrna times., 1925-12-23
COMMUNITY XMAS TREE TOBE
ERECTED At -FOUR CORNERS"
BIG TREE LIGHTED WITH VAR
led COLOR ELECTRIC LIGHTS
Enterprise Sponsored by the Ameri-
can Legion Post of Smyrna-PrO-
gram Christmas Carols Arranged

For the first time in a number of
years Smyrna is to have a Commun-
ity Christmas Tree. Through the eff
forts Of the David Harrison American
Legion Post No. IA, of Smyrna. the
tree will be secured and erected at
the center Of the intersection of Main
and Commerce streets, familiarlv
known as the "Four Corners" The
tree will be lighted with varied color
electric lights with an illuminated
star at the apex and at night will
send its cheer up and down the two
streets, giving strangers a welcome
to Smyrna and above all exemplifv-
ing the Christmas Spirit Peace and
Good Will" Under the auspices of
the American Legion Post community
exercises will be held under the light
ed tree at $50 on Christmas night.
There will be community singing of
Christmas carols led by w. o. Hof-
fecker, opening with two hymns: "Jov
to the World" and Little Town of
Bethlehem" This Will be followed
with prayer; another song, "SiIent
Night; Scripture reading; song by
the Smyrna Male Quartette, "While
the Shepherds Watch Their Flock bv
Night j. f. Hofecker, L. NJ. Price.
Rev. T. G. Hill and W. o. Hoffecker;
address, /. NJ. Price; singing, "Hark
the Herald Angels Sing" School
children will gather around the tree
and assist in the singing. The plan
is to make of it a strictly community
affair and everybody in town and sur
rounding country is urged to attend
this Christmas service. The larger
the crowd, the greater the volume in
singing and the greater success it will
be. Should the weather be stormy
the Christmas Tree Community Ser
vice will take place Sunday evening
at five o'clock. The last time that
had a Christmas Community
Tree the ladies of the Twentieth Cen
tury Club inaugurated the movement.
The tree was one of the tallest and
largest evergreens to be brought TO
Smyrna. Red, white and blue cleo
tIic lights illuminated the tree and
the community exercises despite the
cold frosty night drew a representa-
tive crowd. The boys of the Ameri-
'an Legion Post who are being prais- |
ed for their community spirit and en-
-erprse, want the community tree
his year to be an even greater sue
'eSs and to this end they are bending
very effort. The tree will be erect |
'd Christmas Eve and lighted and
VIII remain up during Christmas |
week.