The Ely miner. [volume] (Ely, Minn.) 1895-1986, 1925-09-04
Who Loses in the
Hold-Up
By OLE BURN


]
/ ketchup. So forgetful. so negligent.
So"
Very well then, dear, it's only two
blocks TO the chain grocery" she sug-
gested sweetly.
And that's how. few minutes later,
l happened to find myself staring into
the muzzle of six-shooter.
"Shove over next to the boss!"
snapped the masked artilleryman.
Think l want to get cross-eyed trying
to cover you both at once?"
1.-THE company's out just $345.4S,"
said the grocer, looking ruefully at his
empty cash drawer.
Yep" l sympathized. THAT bottle
of ketchup cost me just forty-two dol
! lars"
What a nuisance 1t is to be a good
citizen! Every evening for the next
week or so I was called TO various
police stations to identify, if possible,
ticular cannon-juggler.
"Dear," said my wife, when | had
returned from my latest nightly failure,
1--WE big surprise for you" and
| handed me my stolen wallet with not
one of the forty-two dollars missing.
Someone rang the bell; thrust it
into my hand and disappeared before
had chance TO see who it was" she
smiled
plain as day." said. 'This hOld-up
artist is q wise little boy. He's afraid
of being caught and identified by me,
and so he thought he ought to buy
me off, But that reminds me-Tve
never paid for that ketchup."
I was surprised, on entering the
grocery store, to see my Old lieutenant,
Wolfert, in earnest conversation with
the managers. After mutual greetings
and inquiries, during which | learned
! that the ex-lieutenant was now a sales
man for the Excelsior Burglary Insur-
ance company. l told them of the re-
| turn of my wallet
That's great stuff" exclaimed VOL
fert and l was just telling Mr..
| Schulz that he needn't worry about the
! loss of that money. because I've sue
! ceeded in convincing his corporation
to take blanket insurance policy on
all their stores throughout the coun-
try. AS part of the transaction we
have agreed to make good their recent
| loss. It'll mean lots Of publicity for
us; plenty of advertising"
1t was only after I had returned
home and we had finished supper that
| I recalled having neglected to give the
! lieutenant my address. At this mo-
ment our doorbell rang. and before
we had chance to move we heard the
door opened and banged shut, and a
masked figure dashed into our room.
Lieutenant ~ l gasped. And in my
excitement the only thing I could say
was. How did you find out my ad-
dress?" .- af.-.. .... ... ..-
Quick ~ he snapped. SECT out your
checkers Lively now! Set 'em up"
Just as if he was ordering squads
right %
And 1 obeyed without question.
The doorbell rang. Somebody
knocked.
Don't forget" said Wolfert, as
went to open the door, I've been here
couple of hours"
When l opened that door and saw
those two burly, determined-looking
policemen before me, l almost lost all
my nerve, and the lieutenant took COM
mand of the situation.
Fright this way, officers" he called.
IF, as imagine, you're chasing some
one"
"Surei" replied one of the policemen.
"A gun-man"
what was the yell in here? asked
the other.
1.-THE woman heard a noise at the
kitchen window Someone climbing
down the fire escape" Wolfert an
swered promptly.
One of the officers dashed into the
kitchen and out on the fire escape; the
other ran out the door.
OF course the chase was unsuccess-
full and soon Wolfert and were facing
each other, in silence.
Ny musings were interrupted by the
lieutenant taking out of his pocket a
roll of bills. Calmly. deliberately, he
began counting.
'"These Hadden bakeries do pretty
good business, all right" he remarked.
"You have no kick coming yourself"
joked But you might have gotten
me into fine mess" / added serious
ly. You're the last person in the
world I've have suspected of robbery"
wait; not so FAST 20 he interrupted.
You can't say that"
Didn't you hold up the Haddon
place and take their money!" l asked
my anger rising.
"Yes," he replied calmly And |
held up Schulz and your ownself not
so very long ago"
Man % exclaimed. Are you madf"
whats the matter with you. any
howY he snapped. Didn't you get
your money back?'
Eyes, thanks" l answered.
"And didn't the Ky get their
money back?"
Eyes" | admitted.
And just as soon as the Haddon
people sign this policy covering all
their stores they're going to get theirs.
You see. modern craftsmanship methods
are progressing all the time Does any
body lose because of my unusual meth
ods?" he asked
yes" | replied for the third time.
and added. Il do. l lose all chance of
collecting that FIVE hundred dollar re-
ward"
No Infdel Hands