Evening star., 1925-06-07

toned IN behalt OF
another small kink. like this one:
There is woman who reads news
papers because she wants to know
what is going on in the world-not
Just home stuff, but way-off happen
ings of the four corners of the earth
never mind about the earth being
round. After she has learned details
up to date, she waits for the next
paper TO tell her some more. At
lea ST. that has been the way of it
until, say. few weeks ago. Since
then she has had to face the fact
that all newspa pers-every last one
of them-are carrying headlines some
thing like these:
Delayed ship reports unusually
dangerous iCebergs. Had to change
route to avoid them"
Captain and crew of ship report
Sea serpent l50 feet long and as thick
as q barrel Terrific monster might
crush a liner"
"Bandaui predicts severe earth
quakes in Italy in late June or July.
Streets are slipping in Rome. Grew
ice six feet in width and more in
depth opens suddenly in busy thor
oughfare.'
Dome of st. Peters said to I've in
danger of caving in on thousands of
pilgrims"
What about it all? Nothing. Moth
ing whatever-eXcept that:
The woman is about to pack her
suit case for Rome.
A WOMAN addicted TO thrills took
a sightseeing trip to a#plaCe of
mental shadows. Inside the gate she
asked an oldish gentleman as to the
best way of getting to the building
which. incidentally. was straight
ahead, with the rest OF the party
making for It. Still, if you want to
know things you have got to ask ques-
tions. so she asked the oldish gentle.
man, and he responded with real in
terest that he was going that way and
would be pleased to act as guide. 1t
was his day, he explained. for visiting
the place, as the dental authority in
charge. and as he was bit early she
might like to see something of the
grounds.
SO they strolled around the greenery
Of trees and bushes and lawns, and
finally. after they were on their way
to the main entrance, he told her. with
a frankness for which he excused him.
self. that she would be a much heal
thier woman If she would see dentist
about her own teeth. Naturally, you
don't enjoy a thing like that, espe-
cially as you have the very best of
dentists to keep you in regular trim
Don't misunderstood me-I am not
hunting up clients-for that matter,
have money enough TO humor my own
whims; and, having been much inter
ested in your chat. ii would give me
r11Aa give Won treatment with
out pay"
Now, If you are just a plain woman
in a plain black frock, you know
right we'll that no man is going to be
so struck with your appearance as to
offer a thing like that-especially a
distinguished old gentleman who pre-
sumably knows any number of inter
eSting chatterS. SO the woma n
thanked him her best, but explained
that she had her own dentist-which
made no difference; he kept on,insist-
ing-so insistingly that, without
realizing that she had 1t in her to
make so inane and unkind, and so on,
remark, she blurted out:
You must be crazy
81 am," answered the gentleman.
amiably. Sometimes / am so crazy
that ! have to he kept under lock and
KEY Then. again. | get better and
grounds. When | first come here
many years ago. | extracted the keys
from the plano. but, as time goes on.
I find myself less concerned over the
teeth of the world. though | really
would be pleased to give you treat
ment. You see. | carry my case. al
ways, in case of emergency-an nd
there is A very good seat down bit
under a tree"
And with all the zeal that a scien-
tist may give to his profession he
drew from his coat pocket a black
leather case filled with dental instru-
ments-made of jack straws.
X
A SOUL expert gave a little talk
the other night on the subject of
Flesh Camouflag ge." What she meant
was Cosmetics"
To the small cluster of &omen seat
ed around a parlor in chairs and a
man standing in a doorway. she an
nounced that rouge is vanity. Vanity
is sin. Sin is-ask Billy Sunday! She
had no use for Herbert Spencer's s
theory that the first step a savage
takes toward civilization is to adorn
himself with feathers or brilliant dyes.
And, obviously. she had never been
over to the museum on visit to those
,la cfa in