The Omaha morning bee., 1925-02-15
BY CHAkLtS L. SVEN,
Confidential secretary and stenographer
to Woodrow Wilson Turing His Eight
Years Ia the White House,

which left everybody In good humor,
but with no secrets of state divulged.
Enjoyed Limericks.
He enjoyed reciting or reading dog
gerel OF all kinds. but his favorite
form OF humor was the limerick. He,
had an unlimited fundAf lifnericks'
always at his comma nd, Md when he
had difficulty in sleeping he was ac-
customed to reciting all the limericks
he knew untsl he fell asleep. Once.
on one OF his first campaign trips, he
confessed that he had recited AZ lin
ericks before drowsiness overlook him.
These limericks he called upon to
serve not only as humorous touches
to his subject. but frequently as illu-
minating illustrations. In his first
presidential campaign when the FAC
ton Of the republican party headed
by Roosevelt formed the progressive
party, he frequently recited rhyme
as an illustration of his opinion OF
progressive republican,:
] never saw a purple COW,
never hope to see one;
loul tiiS II tCii yo0 o'y ANS',
I'd rather see than be one.
One of his favorites in his early
campaigns was this one, which he EN-
ployed to illustrate a sudden and un-
expected turn of events:
There was a young lady OF Niger
Who smiled as she rode on tiger;
They returned from the ride
With the lady inside,
And the smile on the face OF the tiger.
lie was particularly fond Of the
stories told OF President Lincoln,
and told many OF them himself, His
memory for stories was particularly
good, sometimes too good FOR those
who surrounded him. On my long
Journey from the aviation camp in
California to join the presidential
party on the George Washington In
peace conference. I heard a good
story, of the type that I thought
Mr. Wilson would enjoy. On the
first day out, the president was
transacting no business to require
my presence and i asked Admiral
Grayson to tell the story to the
president.
1t was the story of the Irishman's
conception of socialism an old
one now, but repeat 1t for the COM
ment Mr.. Wilson made upon 1t. as in
dicating the kind of hiynor he en-
joyed most:
Pat, who was known to be a social
list, was asked by Mike to explain the
socialist creed to him. Pat replied in
detail that 1t was community Of own
ership, the equitable division of all
material wealth.
do ye mean to say" asked Mike
'if ye had two houses, ye would give
me wan?"
Certainly" replied Pat. that So
cialism.''
And II ys had two automobiles,
would ye give me wan Of thim?" per-
sisted Mike. II would" agreed Pat.
And If We had two pigs, ye would
give me wan Of them?'
"Aw. gwan." replied Pat. "Ye
know very we'll I've got two pigs!''
| thought II good story, of just
the sort that Mr.. Wilson enjoyed. and
was taken aback by Admiral Gray
sons report:
I "You tell Swem his memory is fail
ing" said Mr.. Wilson. II told him
that story myself It's my favorite." ;"
Story telling with him was not a
plaything. a mere excuse for socia-
bility or the means of passing an
idle hour. 1t was in part an IRE
pressible expression Of his sheer
good fellowship; for the rest. It was
very serviceable compensating de-
vice In moments OF crisis. In times
OF intense nervous strain, when ev-
cry body around him was taking fire
from the coalhot events of the
times. he found calm in a good story
or a bit OF humor.
On the morning after the Lusi-
tania was sunk, when the country
was at white heat and his desk was
literally covered with kilograms Of
fering advice. he stopped in the
midst Of his work to tell me an
Irish story. 1t is an old story now.
one that l would have forgotten but
for the occasion OF its telling. lie
was as deeply affected as any man
in America by the event Of the day
before, but 1t was I'm crises such as
this that he displayed his extraordi-
nary courage and selfmastery.
Wilson Defends Silence.
Once when he was being criticized
on every hand and he was besieged
by friends to reply TO the attacks, he
defended his silence with this story:
There was dignified old lawyer Of
TIE south. he said. Colonel Pettigrew
by name. Colonel Pettigrew on one
occasion lost a civil suit and his client.
very much aggrfeved, followed him
out Of court, abusing him all the
while. lie called the colonel a thief.
liar, and still more abusive names.
10 which Colonel Pettlgrew paid not
the slightest attention, until the man
called him a federalist. Then he
knocked him down, and a bystandef
said: why. colonel. why did you
strike him for that? That Is the least
offensive thing he said
Yes. damn him. said the colonel
''but II was the only true thing he
aid"
THAT IL the only kind OF criticism
pay attention to-" Mr. Wilson added
With twinkle IN his eye.
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