Evening star., 1925-08-09

early in the season of the
H. hectic pennant drive which
mad its climax in the big bat
tie. Base ball draws more bugs than
any bug bait ever invented. Needless
to say, Betty was a lady bug and
therefore more peculiar than the male
indigenous to the Polo Grounds.
She invaded the press box. Not that
the press box at the Polo Grounds is
at all exclusive or tinged with any
particular literary or Journalistic at
mosphere. Sometimes the actors anC
other bandar log of Broadway crowd
out the drab and dittident base bal
writer's of which [ was one. 1t was
for this reason that Mr.. Charles Dry
den called it the pest box.
The Mastodons were going through
their preliminary practice, and the
Master Mind was batting them out
The Master Mind is one of the polite
nicknames for the manager of the
Mastodons. If you call him that tC
his face and smile, you fight your
way out of the park.
1 would like to speak to the official
scorer" said Base Ball Betty.
They pointed out Mr.. William J.
Tanner of the Sun, who was glover
Ing at the green infeld.
Base Ball Betty tripped up to Mr.
Tanner, who rose and uncovered, a
ing through his horn-rimmed specta-
cles. why did you give Heinie Slam
norman an error on that one in the
eighth yesterday? 1t was hard one
20 handle. 1 don't think any one could
have held it."
Mr.. William ]. Tanner spluttered.
Most of his colleagues had to hold
their hands to their mouths or show
unusual interest in the base ball
practice.
Madam" said Mr.. Tanner. 81 have
been scoring for 20 years. 1t was
my opinion that the play was an err
ror, and l scored 1t as such. My scor-
ing never has been questioned"
of course, there may be room for
argument, but / thought it was a
hit" she said sweetly and passed out
OF the pest box.
My whole afternoon is spoiled" "
complained Mr.. Tanner. 'I feel like
resigning this scoring job 1t is a
most ungrateful task, anyhow" There
was no comment. Mr.. Tanner, by
virtue of long service was not to be
twitted in the pest box.
x x
IN the seventh inning that afternoon
Wheat raped one right at Heinie
Slammerman. Heinie should have
held it, but the ball got away. 1t
seemed a palpable error, but one of
the younger writer's shouted to the
official scorer. Hit or error, Mr..
Tanner"
"A hit" said Mr.. Tanner, holding
up one finger. The sign of an error
is the formation of a zero with the
thumb and forefinger. There was no
comment. but it was seen that the
advent of the lady bug had distorted
the judgment of the most meticulous-
ly correct scorer in either league.
After that the presence of Base Ball
Betty became noticed not only by the
base ball writer's attached to the
Mastodons, but by the players them
selves.
Do you suppose asked Merton of
the Globe one day, that she is srnit-
ten by the charms of Heine Slammer-
man? That Brigham Young of the
national pastime already has married
at least one wife in all of the boroughs
of Greater New York and has been in
more divorce courts than Casey
Stengel has been on ball clubs"
The speculation proved unfounded.
On her second invasion of the pest
box Base Ball Betty demanded to be
shown the Tribune man. This writer
used TO handle base ball players with
out gloves. Some of them used to
threaten his life.
You ought to quit this picking on
poor Bennie Kaufman" she said.
It's getting a bit cruel. He's in a
slump, and nobody feels worse about
Il than he does. You're making him
worse. That stuff is driving him
crazy, and you do not have to do it."
We'll, if you are that much inter
ested in Kaufman" began the
Tribune man.
I'm interested in the Mastodons,
that's all" she said. That declara-
ton seemed to be correct. She was
interested in no particular base ball
player, and she certainly was not in
terested in any of the camp follow
ers in the pest box.
On the third visit she asked to talk
to Mr.. Hamilton Cain, the dean Of
all the base ball writer's. In the days
of his youth and agility Mr.. Cain had
been an infielder on the Mastodons
and one of the most graceful athletes
ever in the game. He claimed the in
vention of the hook slide and the
squeeze play, and few disputed him.
a gallant and affable gentleman was
Mr.. Hamilton Cain, loved by ball
players and newspaper men alike.
His chief conviction was that all UNI
pires were bad. When the Mastodons
were not going so we'll Mr.. Cain
would attribute it to the bad umpir-
ing. His pet hate was Jimmy
Burkett. the umpire. The players
called him Catfish, but not to his face.
The price for that would be $50 or
800 in fines.
II just wanted to thank You. Mr..
Cain" said Base Ball Betty. for that
splendid denunCiation of Umpire Bur
kett. He seems to have it in for the
Mastodons. That was wonderful epi-
gram of The MaStodOnS can
beat any nine-man ball team in Amer
lea: but they can't beat a ten-man
team when one of them Is the um.