The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1925-03-11
He Discusses Mo4eue
Morals

immoral plays in New York is %
high that the pig pen habitues v
never get n chance TO have a 10. y
al themselves In what the play.
wrlghts and producers call a ',ses
ment Of LIS"
What's going 10 be the result
Of this decadencc OF the drama
cappy?'
An excellent result, naturally.
People are going 10 see so mud
Of .sg pens that next year som.
! human being Will kicx in with soms
good. satisfying, old-fashioned pay
about true love and honor and
dscncy, and then the dirty play.
wrights viii find themselves out Ia
the cold. They'll have to wat for
new generation 10 grow up and
earn tho price OF seats TO dirty
shows. The district attor1sy need
not worry unduIy. After all. tie
public ~ the best censor"
aSPEAKING Of nasty.nice peeps
~ reminds me OF an old buzzrd
named-well. I'll not mention he
name. because his son is
spocted denizen OF the lumber a..
shipping trade in this city.
~Old what's9lis-name was tie
holIest old hypocrite in this city. lie
WIS yestryman in his church
passed tho plate, subscribed TO f0.
elgn missions. backed a censorship
BIN in every session OF the legs.
laturc, always had his name in the
paper as o subscriber TO something
philanthropic and tending toward
good citizenship-and was in general
what Is known as q street angel and
house devil
When he came homo AZ night bis
family shuddered. When he left IN
the morning they cheered. His wife
never had more than q Sc bill at
one time in her life and his boys
never had enough spending money 10
buy a slingshot to shoot sparrows'
When they got a dime together,
penny at time, father made them
bank IL.
well. one day tho old hypocriis
had TO have his gall stones removed.
and the family doctor. who knew tho
Wretch for what he was. slipVsd the
0ae aakk over he face and then con.
$3.50, tus race.np With some sort o.
phonogrlphic attachment that would
recesd fs,thfuay everything the ~
uent had to say while under mo
snesthetic. You knovN some folks
talk a whole otawith their suoeon.
ssp,sR rais.A "
~ Gu, ouat> Chat old pelican had
to say was a.plenty. He used Ian.
guagc that shocked the doct0s ana
nurses, andlyou know that's goins
some. because they're used TO taking
green waterN over their bows from
morning to night.
THE doctor couldn't even ngurs
out where his patiepi bad learned
such things. until toward the end Of
the operation the old boy tipped
off that he was having lot OF worry
over a No. wife he had In another
city. Apparently that damsel hau
had careless bringing up. j
Pig.pen stuff. You see. the oid
man was - good and pious FOR
long spells that every little while
he had to blow down his boilers
and wallow ia sim.
Tho doctor was so disguised WIN
kim (t appears the old boy was mar
rled 10 the doctors sdoter and haa
whitfield down tho doctors ~ OWNS
TO the 1Act that he Was his brother
in.law) that the medico put the rec
ord on for tl,0cld boy when no was
convalescent.
THE old horse-thief couldn't DEM
his own testimony, so there was
quiet divorce and huge settlement
TO tho martyred family. and every,
body lived happily ever after cScep'
the sinner. His sins having been ca
posed. he couldn't live with them anu
went crazy" -.
Cappy glanced around ut NJ
friends. Regular folks don't neeu y
worry about public morals. They eau
take their sin or leave II alone, y
declared, EVEN an operation py
censor viii never cure the other KY
because there's nothing new unw 2
the sun and theyll try every'n'"'
once"