The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-10-25
Making Dates In Office Is
 Dangerous
By BETH M'ILyAINE

WTERE just one big, happy " w family in this office, says the
 manager, pridefully, as he ushers the new girl' to her desk.
 Among others, she finds herself with a whole assortment of "brothers' who aren't brothers. She feels herself looked over from head to foot, and judged. The old-timers are cautiously polite. The youngsters, in the office only a year or two, act like puppies when something new has appeared to be- in- spected. They're curious and critical some admiring, others of the opinion that ''she's not much" The newness worn off. she is absorbed into the fam fly" and becomes Agnes or Miss, not just "that new girl."
 Then the inevitable happens. The senior filing clerk, bolder than the rest, asks her for a "date." Perhaps the accepts; perhaps she doesn't. That's not the point. The real point is, should she accept or should she not.
 Few girls going into an office have any definite course of action mapped out for themselves. Instead of ''course of action," you can substitute "prin- ciples" or workable ideas" and get my meaning. They trust to luck to do the right thing or the expedient thing when the time comes. They forget that Good Luck was never lady," and will fcheerfuIly lead them into more hot water than could ever fill the ocean.
 Grace's story Illustrates what mean. She trusted to luck to guide her. When Tom asked her to go to dinner with him, she refused because he wore a derby and she simply hated derbies. She went to a dance with Ralph a few nights later, though, as the girl next to her said he could dance divinely. It got around the office that she had re- fused Tom and gone with Ralph. The force took sides. Toms friends cut her; Balpin's friends rushed' her. Work was lost in the scuffle.
 Grace acquired the reputation of be- ing little high stopper; goes out somewhere every night" Her job be- came of secondary importance between the social manoeuvres necessary during office time and her engagements in the evening. The firm was laying off help. That new girl-Grace- she has been raising the dickens in the office among the men," the manager said. Not much of a worker either, although she probably would be if she tried. Put an x opposite her name."
 And the moral of that is, as the Duchess said to Alice in Wonderland, prepare to use every ounce of tact when you start in a new position. To gain one friend don't lose another, especial ly in the office where you work. Grace would have been a much wiser girl if she had not accepted Ralph's invitation either, and had made daytime friends of them both. Later on, perhaps, after she had established herself as a good worker and a good comrade, date" now and then would have caused no friction, provided she could meet the favored one in the office on a strictly business basis. That is where she made her second great, common error.
 An office force is not righly a social gathering. I heard the other day of a certain office where no work is ac- complished on Monday mornings be- cause everybody talks over the good times of the weekend. Such confus- ion of business and pleasure is bound to have a deterrent effect on office spirit, the work accomplished, and on the people themselves.
 The girl who lives at home knows men whom she has met through her family, school, church, other friends. She ia seldom interested in the men at the office. She will call them mice boys" or ''good sOprts", but her escort to the movies or the dance will be from the first group.
 'T live in New Jersey" one wise girl, bond assistant with a brokerage house, told me, land all the men l 70 with live in the same town. consistently refuse to accept invitations from the men here at the office, because I would rather keep my social and Dus- mess acquaintances separate: It makes yny work easier with nothing to dis tract my mind. They've ceased asking me and I'm glad" or living in a girls club. Where is eh9 to find the necessary relaxation from her work? In the office, of course, the first place she has chance to meet nice men. Her problem IS both simple and difficult.
 Ardelia is typical She has com through the fire tempered by her ex- oerience. Two years ago she came to New York from Indiana. Her first onaitiOn she lost by pure absentmlnded- negs during dictation. Shorthand lost itn charms when Fred, dashlng young salesman, was around.
 She has a new job now. Experience has taught her how to go out with the Hfeilows." She has developed that nee essary faculty of drawing a fine. but distinguishable line between business hours and play hours, even though her "piaymates" are recruited from the of- flee. She now smiles up at the mas. culine form draper over the corner of her desk, but shakes her head: Nope, I'm busy, run along" And they run.
 It's a difficult art, she admits, this having one person both business ac- ouaintance and an outside friend, but how it pays!