The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1924-03-23
The Congenital
Bachelar On
LiEom

Little theatre.
And it is calculated to leave a par
ticular relish in the mouths of the
patrons.
Why:
The following account Of ''Liliom,"
as seen by the congenital bachelor.
which Mr.. John Irons gives us, will be
sufficient answer:
My wife and had gone to a Chi
nese restaurant in search of different
food. We were sitting In a booth at
Shanghi Lows when all of a sudden
we heard a great roaring voice.
Here, you yaller gal, bring me
food! Want me to sit here till / get
barnacles all over my bottom Full
speed ahead, and tell Charlie allie samee
no can wait till tomorrow" After
the gale was over I went and dragged
in my gfizzled old sea friend, Captain
Scopalamin, and made him sit with us.
Aren't you ashamed to make so
much fuss about your food. captain!"
No, nam; it's sorter habit o. mine to
give commands and have 'em Obeyed.
You see, man. I'm used to the quarter
deck, and I amt been married. Not
NNts UAuh AAC0A AO SAOo6hs
Funny; you take all the able bodied
seamen you want, and landlubbers, too,
but they's soft as a baby with their
women folk when you scratch deep
enough. Take this here bird, LiliOm,
that was such a roughneck.'
What do you know about Liliom,
captain?" Mrs. Irons asked him.
We'll, nam, man / run into last
-. NUT To f,sS hnHa skfla
theatre to one o. their rehearsals and
just like I'm a tell you. 1 don't know
where it was he took me, but it was
some unlikely place for an old sea dog
o the likes o me. He took me into a
large room with stage at one end and
a few chairs and l sits in one O.
those little chairs along the wall and
trusts to providence that it holds up
with me and purity soon / was a sit
ting on the edge o. that little chair.
Once upon a time when / was a little
c0dger with molasses taffy curls and
all o. that, they sent me to a kinder
garten and we used to sit in chairs just
like the one / was perched on. I got
to thinking all about how we used to
sing about Jack Frost, and weave mats,
anna Sew anu i AOA6OL seal u
ing about that as / amt remembered
it in years and years. / looks up at
that there stage and saw a mess O.
jumbled parts and things such as an
old horse hair sofa and boxes and a
mirror and a piano, and the drop was
the outsides o. a white house with the
paint all a cracking off, and l said, now
don't that just look like the houses in
-,
the southern mountains? Afore you
there in that little cotton town I amt
thought of in ages. was just revell-
ing in my recollections when my ears
began to perk up and what was a see
ing and hearing on the stage made me
forget all about myself. was a Listen
ing to the pale voice o. the wonfSS
they's cast as Julie, and it began to
creep down my back and get under my
skin. 1t had a washed-0ut sound and
all o that, but it just a fitted into the
look in her face, and what she was
saying that l sits on the edge o. my
chair. She's sort o got air o. finality
about her because / think she dropped
all the way to the bottom O. love for
this Teller Liliom, and she's just like
a pale sort o flower that don't know
much about holding up it's head. but
she's ready to put her meek face to
the sun. After the cops tell her he's
worthless Teller she tells him she
amt got no money, but it would be his
if she had any. Amt it awful how
the women'n do that when they loves?
Now, me, amt a lovin' no woman
that's all meek like. likes the kind
that'n fight back. but I'm skeered it'll
not a bachelor I'll be if sits and
listens to this Miss Julie long.
And this hard bird, Mr.. LiliOm, is
just the spit and image O. lots o. men,
That there man a playing the part
makes me sit up and listen, too. You
see, he's SO different from the Julie
woman. He's a slouehing around with
a cap perched cOeky on his head and
swapping his fingers and a making
sounds like cOrks popping, and a sort O.
mesmerizing the little woman with
his play acting. Mr.. Liliom got me to
believing that he was just the worth
less kind O. braggart he is, but he's
got a sort O. streak O. brassy nerve
that makes the women fall for him.
He made me forget me-and that's
some job. young folks-when he got to
acting around after Jolie tells him she's
going to have a little baby. What i'm
mOrtals these here fools be, as some
body said! Julie with all o. her Silly
sounding kind O. voice made me creep
all over, the slow quiet way she told
him; and it made me nearly boil over
the way he treated her about it at
first. The look in her eyes got me to
thinking about some things that's after
all sorter holy like, and l amt
thought o things like that since l went
to sea. She's got into her face, and
don't know how she got it there, all
that sad part o. all wOmen's lives that
men don't know much about, and, sir,
just a sittin' and a listening to that
there tone so fatal and final like IN
her voice made me feel like I'd like to
have a woman like that, too. that'd
love me so blind she wouldn't see all
my rotten faults.
And then saw Mr.. Liliom in heaven
and the judge was sitting on a chair
perched on an old dry goods box and
a passing out mercies, and this here
rOushneck had died O. suicide. wasn't
it: And even after he got there he was
was still n roughneck. The thing
that nearly broke me down,
though. and amt so softie.
was that after he got there he was still
just as hard and as stiff-necked and
asking questions o. the heavenly judge
and still a keeping all O. the personality
he he'd below. He wouldn't bend none
not yet. Looks to me like we gotter
bow our heads sometimes to whatevers
going to fall to drop on them. Looks
like we gotter be broke up somehow,
sometime: and all O. that's in the
play, and Mr.. Roughneck makes it all
fine and plain with his acting. 1t
shore took 4 long time afore he was
meek at all, but he had it a coming
and he gets it in the end And all
through the thing-and. it gets nv goat.