Evening star., 1924-10-05
Archie Mofm Brilliant Aid

have liked to live in a world Of i'd deally
united couples, himself ideally united
to some charming and affectionate
girl But, as a matter of cold fact, he
was a bachelor, and most of the
couples he knew were veterans of
several divorces In Reggie's circle.
therefore, the home life of Archie and
Lucille shone like a good deed in a
naughty world. 1t inspired him. In
moments of depression, it restored his
waning faith in human nature.
Consequently, when Archie. having
greeted him and slipped into a chair
at his side, suddenly produced from
his inside pocket the photograph of
an extremely pretty girl and asked
play which he was financing, he was
shocked and disappointed.
"Archie"-his voice Quivered with
emotion-''is it worth it? Is it worth
il, old man? Think of the poor little
woman at home.
Archie was puzzled.
"Eh. old top? Which poor little
| woman?'
Think of her trust in you. her
Il don't absolutely get you, old
| beam
What would Lucille say If she
knew about this?"
"Oh, she does. She knows all about
| it"
Good heavens cried Reggie He
| was shocked to the core of his being
"It was Lucille's idea" explained
| Archie. It's like this. old thing: I've
| never met this female, but she's a pal
! OF Lucille She comforted his con- =
| science with the reflection that, IL she
wasn't now, she would be in a few
| days--"and Lucille wants to do her
d bit of good. She's been on the stage
| in England, you know-supporting a
| jolly old widowed mother and edu
| eating a little brother and all that
kind and species of rot. you under
| stand. and now she's coming over to
America. and Lucille wants you to
| rally round and shove her into your
| show and generally keep the home
| fires burning and so forth. How do We
| eo?"
Reggie beamed with relief.
'Oh. see" he said. why, delighted
| old man: quite delighted"
! Any small part would do Ism
| there maid something in your
| bob's worth of refined entertainment
who drifts about saying, Yes, madam
| and all that sort of thing? Well then:
| that's just the thing. Topping! I knew
| could rely on YOU. old bird, I'll get
Lucille TO ship her round to your ad-
| dress when she arrives. | fancy she's
| due to totter in somewhere in the
| next few days. Well. I must be pop
ping. Toodle- 90"
ip--pip," said Reggie
X
IT was about week later that Lu-
= cille came into the suite at the
Hotel Cosmopolis that was her home.
and found Archie lying on the couch.
smoking refreshing pipe after the
labors of the day 1t seemed to Archie
that his wife was not in her usual
cheerful frame of mind. He kissed her,
and. having relieved her of her para
sol, endeavored. without success. to
balance it on his chin. Having pick ID
it up from the floor and placed it on
the table. he became aware that Lu-
| cille was looking at him in a de-
spondent sort of way. Her gray eyes
were clouded.
'Hullo. old thing" said Archie
What's up?"
Lucille sighed wearily.
"Archie darling, do YOU know any
really good swear words?'
Well" said Archie ref1ectively. "let
me see. l did pick up a few tolerably
ripe and breezy expressions over in
France. But why"
because | want to relleVe my feel
ings'
Anything wrong"
'Everything's wrong. I've just been
having tea with Bill and his Mabel
"Oh-ah'" said Archie. interested.
And what's the verdict?"
Guilty" said Lucille. And the sem
tence. if I had anything to do with it.
| would be transportation for life" She
peeled off her gloves irritably. What
fools men are! Not you. precious
you're the only man in the world that
isn't, it seems to me. You did marry a
nice girl. didn't you? You didn't go
running round after females with
crimson hair. goggling at them with
your eyes popping out of your head
like A bulldog waiting for a bone
"Oh. l say. Does old Bill look like
that?'
Worse"
Archie rose to a point of order.