The Coconino sun., 1924-03-14

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and Many Have Tried-and Some are
even said to have Spent Several Days
| Trying before Being Rescued You
often hear Tales of Tourists Getting
Lost in these Sand Hills and Dying
Of Thirst. / hardly believe this, as
anyone dying there would probably
soon be covered with Drifting Sand
and WHY Die of Thirst So Close to
the Mexican Border, where Amy One
can get Any Thing to Drink. You
can't get Lost. You slay Wonder
Where you Are, if you get Panicky
or Scared or Crazy with the Heat
but if you Only Stop to Think you
will Know that No One can go Very
/ Fast or Get Very Far in This Sand,
| consequently you must be Still In 1t.
Don't Worry. Some One will Find
You-Sooner or Later, if you have
| ANY Water-and if you haven't thev
will Find You Anyway-if you haven't
Dried Up & Blown Away. You May
| Not Look Familiar when they Find
You-but you will NOT Need Gre
mating
"California & the Govt. have been
Trying for A Long Time to build a
permanent road through this Wonder
full Waste of Sand, SO that it will not
| be Wasted Any Longer and Folks
from All over the World can see What
| the Devil can Do when he Turns
| Loose. It beats Hell, whoever built
it. Building a Permanent Road seems
Impossible because the Sand will not
Stay where it Belongs, Drifting Ev-
erywnere. Miles and Miles of Nice
| New Planks were once used to build
| a Road with and Most of them are
| Still Supposed to be There Somewhere
Buried in the Sand, excepting those
broken up by Tourists Stuck IN the
Sand and Used for Camp Fires while
Waiting to be Found"
Wild Raudebaugh was using his
most persuasive tone when ne asked
a colored man:
Don't you want me to write you a
| life insurance policy Z"
"No, sah,r was the reply, "Ah amt
any too safe at home as it is"
One Of Doc Tex Mackey's dental
in,patients said to Doe the other day
while he was a settin' in Docs chair:
"Guess you'd better give me gas,
Doc"
"But, man, the tooth's out!"
II know, but givin' you the two
dollars is what's goin' ter hurt the
| most"
Doc wandered into a Turkish bath
place a few weeks ago while he was
in the vicinity Of Lampassas, Lam
passas county, Texas, the same being
where he was bred and PARKWAY rear
ed. One of the natives came in just
after Tex did and lowed he'd like to
try what a bath Of that kind did to
a feller. So he went into the hot
room. But he'd been in there only
about ten minutes when he let a yell
out Of him that reused everyone for
block around. Then he bolted out Of
the hot room with nothing on except
red flannel shirt.
"Look at this he yelled, pointing
to the shirt
esWell, that's nothing but an under
shirt. Why don't you take it off Z"
"Why, dang it, just took one off
and this one was right here all the
time. looked all over the shack for
this here undersnirt last summer an
couldn't find in noWheres."
Then he began to cry.
can / shot pore OF Bill Simkins
fer stealin' itp' he moaned.
Somebody sent the editor of the Lo-
katown Gazette few bottles of home
brew. On the same day he received
for publication, wedding announce
ment and a notice of an auction sale. |
Here is the result:
ssWnl. Smith and Miss Luck Ander-
son were disposed of at public auction
at my farm, one mile east of a beau
tiful cluster Of roses on her breast |
and two white calves before a back
ground of farm implements, too nu-
merous to mention in the presence of
about seventy-five guests, including
two mich cows, six mules and a bob I
sled. Rev. Jackson tied the nuptial +
knot, with about two hundred feet Of /
hay rope and the bridal couple left on /
good John Deere plow for an extend
ed trip with terms to suit the pur-
chaser. They will be at home on their
friends, with one good baby buggy
and few kitchen utensils after ten
months from the date Of sale to re-
sponsible parties and some fifty chic
kens."