davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1924-10-02
Watching The Parade
BY JOHN PILGRIM

TN WATCHING with interest little do
nestle drama that is working out uptown.
Here is the dramatiS persOnae;
Ginger, a wife, pretty, clever, extraordinari-
Iy wise, diplomatic and in love.
Jimmy, husband, convinced that n man
must necessarily know more than woman
on any subject In love. .
Ginger is secretary to big man downtown,
She comes in contact with some of the finest
minds in modern business. She is trusted 80
thoroughly that when her employer goes TO
Europe she has n power of attorney and con-
ducts his business for him. And she mas
made good in that exacting position for years
Jimmy is a well paid expert Because Gin
ger loathes hOusework, she retained her job.
Jimmy is the sort of man who would give
money freely to his wife, but would not set
apart definite income for her. When they
married he made that plain:
II want you to quit work, he said.
"Will you make me a definite allowanceF
asked Ginger.
~ would not" said he, fatty. II do not
like the idea as between man and wife. But
you should always have every penny could
spare if you needed it. .~r
Ginger subOrdinates hers4lf-most of the
time-to Jimmy's assumed male superiority.
Yet it is Ginger to whom every acquaintance
would 10 for information, for judgment, for
all about the reactions of gazoOkis to the acid
wide, wise, kindly view. Jimmy may know
of hydromuckets, but that's all. And he is
getting on Ginger's nerves.
One of these days they'll come to a show
down. Will Ginger yield to her kind, loving
but essentially narrow husband for the sake
of life? Or will he learn to see himself in
the mirror? Either way there will be heart
burnings.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1924-10-02
WHY MEN ARE SHABBY.

Complaints come from leading tailors
of London that the ever-increasing ex-
travagance of women creates a CORE
spending shabbiness in the dress of men.
One tailor says that everywhere one
sees badly dressed husbands accompanied
by extravagantly arrayed wives, while
stability dressed business men dictate
letters to stenographers wearing the lat
est styles from Paris.
This condition is noted the world over.
Women attach more Importance than men
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1924-10-02
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A perfect love was theirs that grew
From out a first acquaintance, too;
No quarrels, theirs, or jealous fears,
No darkling doubts, no words or tears;
They only loved with all their hearts
And all the joy that youth imparts;
No one could hope to come between
And wreck their blissfulness serene.
A puppy love? MayhapS but still
What truer love their lives could fill?
What truer JOY could lift them up
This little fellow and his pup!
Edmund ]. Kiefer.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1924-10-02

to dress, and men are largely to blame
for the situation. There is perhaps as
much discussion by wives over their raj,
ment as anything else. Most Of them
desire to make a good impression, which
is their right and privilege, and most men
take pride in the appearance of their
wives. 1t is also the line Of least resist
rance. The men often meet the situation
by eveningrup on themselves.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1924-10-02

A Texas banker has undertaken to
float Mexican loan of fifty million dol
lars without asking Wall Streets consent
There is no limit to which Texas lese
majestic will not go. =.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1924-10-02
Pre.Empted.

- Pre-Empted. h
Mrs. Hale: $50 you have houseful of
amateur fans?"
Mrs. Hill: Don't mention it. My hus-
band has turned the guest room into work
shop, my daughter develops negatives in the
bathroom, while ] can't hang the wash on the
roof without disturbing Willie's wireless" "
No., 4 ~ Helen Marten,
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1924-10-02

1t is announced that painted furs are
becoming fashionable. Between perox-
ide, rouge, lipstick, ct cetera, the color
scheme should be reasonably amenable
to any situation.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1924-10-02

In the efforts to "sell' the city authori-
ties on the modification of the milk ordi-
nances it is charged that attempts are
being made to unload some watered
stock
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1924-10-02
Spirit Photography

Photographer: Il will make speaking
likeness of your wife,"
Mr. Peck: Just likeness, please"
Hugo Gerding.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1924-10-02

The Prince of Wales spent some of
his time on his Canadian ranch pitching
hay. And he is not running for office,
either. 49,
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1924-10-02

Sweet Memory, waited by thy gentle
gale
Oft up the stream of Time turn my
Rogers.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1924-10-02
Wise Girls.

That two may live cheaply as one
May be quite true,
And yet it isn't being done
I'm telling you.
Though we walk on with glad romance
In loves sweet way,
Girls are too wise to take chance
Like that today s-
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1924-10-02

II the choice left to me, whether to have
free press q free government, would
scAoose a free press.-Thomas Jefferson.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1924-10-02
NEVER roo OLD TO FLAP

They do say that in some families the only
difference between the flapper daughter and
her mother is their ages Newark Every
Evening.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1924-10-02
WAITING THE Co SIGNAL.

The old crouch two doors from US came
home lit up last night and parked himself
at the front door two hours, waiting for the
red hall lamp to turn green Dallas Asw&
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1924-10-02

Talking back to motorcycle cop is a di-
version not listed under the How to Keep
Welr' column. 1t is as reckless and silly a
venture as stopping a fire-chiefs auto to tell
the chief funny story. 1t is in fact more
dangerous Fire chiefs know how to take a
joke.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1924-10-02

She loved me for the dangers had passed
And loved her that she did pity them.
Shakespeare.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1924-10-02
These days the roads are full of them.

The highways and byways were hazardous
enough before the day of the motorcycle
Igendarme but they are one-way hospital
rontcs now that he is on the job in such large
numbers.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1924-10-02

X, He chases one man for careless driving and
runs down eight men before catching him.
He is for making the roads safe for pedes-
TRANS, no matter how many he has to kill in
the good cause. He has great courage and
will risk anybody's life in the performance of
his duty. - -
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1924-10-02
Bribing The Editor.

..4-.s Bribing The Editor.
Because the editor bought my joke
took him out to lunch,
And all the time we sat and ate
1 had a growing bunch
That was playing losing game.
The bill confirmed my fears.
A one dollar joke from a three dollar lunch
Left me two dollars in arrears!
Harvey Peake.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1924-10-02
hN.aaONCE
En ONER
10, THE MoroRcYCLE policeman

.LO, THE MOTORCYCLE POLICEMAN
A motorcycle policeman is a rugaway noise
with a mean disposition He Is sn. ilburn-
ing sheriff with heart-burning crouch. He
is bad news travelling no place in particular
and trying to get there ahead of hislown We
locipede.
He goes through life thinking he's a bull
let and making a racket like the scissors of
fensiye by way of additional evidence. He
is a gasoline cayalryman on a flame-spitting
roller skate, and the only travelling man who
can laugh at "a STOP" sign and have him
self endorsed for excellent judgment.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1924-10-02

Motorcycle policemen only know WHERE
to take joke and they take him there with
great celebrity.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1924-10-02
SPORTING EDITORS OBSERVATION

One thing to guarantee stable government
is reasonable amount of horse sense
NIoberly Mo. Monitor-Index.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1924-10-02
THE ACE HERALD
FREDERICK 1. THOMPSON .. +. PRESIDENT

Entered at Birmingham. Ala, post office as Sec
end-ciass matter. act of Congress. Marchs. 1879
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1924-10-02

The great thing in life is to be simple;
And the perfectly simple thing is to look
through keyholes.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1924-10-02

>. Some men are born motorcycle cops, some
achieve motorcycles and some have unpopu-
larity thrust upon them. Appointments as
motorcycle policeman are, however, eagerly
sought in all departments, due to- the fact
that motorcycle man can serve 25 years
on the force and become eligible for retire
ment in the same pair of shoes in which he
joined the service. -
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1924-10-02
No shoemaker can touch him.

When a man joins police force in most
capacities there is little prospect he win go
far, but when he joins it as motorcycle cop,
it is certain he will go far and fast. Ger
tain qualifications are essential for appoint
ment. Only men who are extremely careless,
look well sitting down and who have Con
tinued cold'' stamped upon their personalities
can make good. aa'
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1924-10-02

Telephone (private branch exchange connect
ting all Departmental, Main 1900.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1924-10-02
A slinnarv Cnstomar

"A SIIppoEy OuSOUL10a. +.
81 wouldn't trust that chap, Skinner, any
further than could see him."
You wouldn't, eh?"
mo sir, and I'm near-sighted, at that"
Alex. Halsey.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1924-10-02

A Mother-in-law Tells How to Handle
Husband
/. Select an apartment the usual five
minutes walk from the car line. Exercise
is good for him.
2 See that there are plenty of delicatessen
stores in the neighborhood, so he won't get
tired of good home cooking.
8. Have your friends stay to meals; then
he can't kick about the food.
4. Never sew buttons on his clothes. He
will soon learn how to use safety-pins.
5. Don't cry for money. Run up charge
accounts and let him do the crying.
6. Have plenty of odd jobs for him to do
when he comes home. Then you will have the
paper all to yourself.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1924-10-02

EXCLUSIVE MEMBER OF NORTH AMERI-
CAN NEWSPAPER ALLIANCE IN ALABAMA
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1924-10-02

Having passed in these respects they are
then measured for blue suits, puttees, a red
bicycle and bed in the emergency hospital
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1924-10-02

NEWS NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS., 500, Davidson
Building; state Capital. Montgomery journal
building; Tennessee. Valley. Decatur Daily
Buiiding; Tuscaloosa. News Building; Anniston.
Star Building; Gadsden. Times Building; Muscle
Shoals, Tri-Ciues Daily Building.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1924-10-02

He makes strong motorists seem like weal
sisters and wins all arguments on a minimum
amount of gas.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1924-10-02

4 SUBSCRIPTION RATEs-By mail. payable in
advance, in United States and Canada, Daily
and Sunday, one year. $500; six months. $500:
three months, t2.25; ono month. s5c. Daily
only: One year. $3.50; six months. ss.35: three
months. s1.7s; one month, Use. Sunday only:
Uns year, t250; six months, t1.5o; three
months, 76c; month"; Csc.
Ey Carrier where carrier delivery is main
tanned. zoe per week; SIC per month.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1924-10-02

At a recent party given for three prospect
tive brides, Mrs. s. f. slipped a copy of the
following under each of their plates
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1924-10-02

MEMBER OF ASSOCIATED PREss-rhs As
sociated Press is exclusively entitled to use for
publication Of all news dispatches credited to It,
not otherwise credited Id this paper and also
local news published therein. All rights of re-
publication of special dispatches are reserved.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1924-10-02
Happiness.

IfuppLIt33.
Friend: rs your daughter very happy
teaching voice culture?"
Mrs. Brown: Eyes, she sings at her work"
Mildred Hogan,
If a girl takes a dislike to you. let it go
at that Don't insist on marrying her.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1924-10-02
Hot Digsity.

Hot Diggity.
Jennings 81 was eating some trout yes
terday and got bone in my throat"
Billings: TRY eating some mashed po-
tatoes?"
Jennings; mo, swallowed hot dog and
''''' ' p. s. P.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1924-10-02

'They just Want A Change There was
a change in mayors in practically all Ala
bama cities where the present encumbent had
opposition. There seems to be a disposition
on the part of the people to seek a change,
whether it is beneficial or not They just
want change.-Calhoun County Argus.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1924-10-02

Second Only To Traffic Law.-It begins
to appear that the prohibition law is only a
bad second to the traffic law when it comes
to being violated, while the gambling and
Sunday laws trail just little behind both
of lthem.-Demopolis Times.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1924-10-02
Why Men Leave Home

To 60 to work; Of course.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1924-10-02

Quickest Way To Stop It.--It. seems that
the headlines today shout of more murders
than at any time in the history Of this coun-
try. The quickest and sanest way to stop it
is to put thergHitys to- death; 1t would cause
would-be mHrdere to sEhink of the ieonse-
quenees before an6knot after. =Dothan Eagle
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1924-10-02

Keeping Up With The Crop-The wise
farmer will see to it that cotton ready to pick
is gathered and protected from loss from de-
terioration. There are all kinds of losses on
the farm the same as elsewhere, but none is
SO needless and unjustified as to allow a
crop that is already made and worth good
price to suffer loss for lack of proper care.
Keeping up with the crop is the essential
thing now.-Florence News.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1924-10-02

4 Al Potential Criminal. Isn't an intoxicated
person operating an automobile potentially a
A fine doesn't go far with person of that
Register. s..
The daily worker., 1924-12-09
AS WE SEE IT
BY T. ). o'FLAHERTY.
(Continued from page y

Continued from page II
lecturing British agent as the jugular
vein of the empire.
.XKTHILE the situation in ireland is
wv so critical that, merely point
ing to the goal of the great revolution
list James Connolly, is not sufficient,
at the same time, it must be empha-
sized that only revolution that will
overthrow the capitalist system in
Great Britain will also free Ireland.
Therefore, the duty of the Irish work
ers who took inspiration from Con-
molly, is to make common cause with
the Communist Party of Great Brit
ain and join in the battle to dethrone
the most astute if not the most brut-
al robber class in all human history
IN the meantime it is distressing to
note that no man Of Connolly's vi
sion and revolutionary understanding
has yet appeared in the Irish labor
movement, one who could take an
objective view of the situation and
take advantage Of the chaos, depres-
sion and discomfort of the masses to
rally the workers and peasants behind
a program that would lead to the goal
of workers and peasants govern
ment.
THE first thing man Of the Con-
molly type would do in this crisis
would be to raise the slogan of unity
in the trade union movement in ac-
cordance with the policy of the Red In
ternational of Labor Unions. This kind
Of policy would close up the ranks
Of labor, discredit the takers who
prefer chaos and inaction to militant
constructive program and would also
give undisputed leadership to those
who are determined to make of the
trade unions fighting instruments to
wage the class struggle and not as
agencies of class collaboration. Let
us hope the present crisis will not
find the Irish working class without
at least making step in the direc-
ton of such a policy.
The daily worker., 1924-12-09
TOOL AND DIEMAKERS
OF CHICAGO Find new
INTEREST IN UNION

The Tool and Diemakers' Lodge,
No. 113, Of the international Asso-
citation of MachinIsts, held their an
nuaI election on Friday, Dec. 5, and
cast a vote which beat the best
record In the last three years, In
spite Of the rain and cold.
The members are beginning to
realize that II Is up to them to
build and maintain the organization,
that Il cannot be left to somebody
else. The record-breakInG vote may
also be attributed to the interest
arising In the clash of Ideas which
took place verbally just previous
to the election between the per-
verters Of socialism and the Com
munlsts.
Tho the progressIves didn't win
important offices, they polIed very
good vote, and by the process Of
education continued In this manner,
II Is hoped that In the future the
two forces In the local will unite
for work for their common good.
Organization, education, and soIIdar-
Ity with the whole working class,
should be their future slogan.
The daily worker., 1924-12-09
CALL TO PAN-AMERICAN LABOR
lcontInued from PAGE d

Continued u
the bloody tyranny leadership Of the
Conn parties.
Raise slogan Farmers Government
native capitalism Fight always and
working class to the capitalists
struggle against American Imperialism for
nevertheless In
dictatorship
victory worlds working class It's
capitalist enemies.
comrades the Communist international let
organized the Of American Imperial
and be s~ved from the sug
Gle by capitalist propaganda or ImperlaIs terror
Against capitalists Of the proletarlans
solidarity Of the mpeasts all countries the united
'front.' workers and peasantsI
capitalists the rule Of the working class
under the leadership o Communist Party!
Of the workers Of North Central and
Amerca
Long live ntsrnsOnahe leader Of the world
revolutIonl
Workers (cOmmunIsp Party Of Am
National Committee, Union Educational Lessus.
Communist Party Mexico.
sccretarIat Pan-Anrsrican Ant-lnperIalst League
The daily worker., 1924-12-09
RAILMEN DEFY
LABOR board IN
Vote FOR STRIKE
Ballot Is Being Taken
on Chicago & Alton

A strike vote now being taken
on the Chicago & Alton railroad
by the Brotherhoods of Loco
motive Engineers and Firemen
and Enginemen is another step
in the growing defiance of the
railroad labor board by the rail-
way employees.
A strike vote has just been
completed by these brother
hoods on the Colorado & South
ern system.
5rotherhoods Reject Ruling.
The railroad brotherhoods refuse to
accept the ruling Of the labor board
which would force them to take a
five per cent increase in wages at the
expense Of their present working
rules. This increase has been granted
the eastern roads without change in
the working rules
The Order Of Railroad Conductors
and the Brotherhood OF Railroad
Trainmen are also involved in the dis
pute with As western railroads. The
labor board is expected to announce
a decision on the latter dispute early
this week.
Try to Divide Workers.
The function of the labor board has
been to attempt to break the soIidar.
ity of the brotherhoods by playing
the eastern roads against the western,
and by abolishing working rules which
have raised the standard Of living of
the railway workers.
The brotherhoods have several
times defied the authority Of the rail.
road labor board, and discomfort
among the railway employees thruout
the entire west is growing.
The daily worker., 1924-12-09
Mid City Branch
Changes Meeting
Place on Thursday

The first meeting Of the Mid-City
branch since the opening of the party
discussion on immediate tasks of the
Workers Party will be held in a new
meeting place. The Mid-City branch,
which formerly met at Emmett Memoir
ial Hall, will meet next Thursday,
December II, at the Greek Hall, 722
Blue Island az nue.
Due to the meeting night last month
on Thanksgiving night, no meeting
has been held for month Much i'm
portant business will be decided upon
at this meeting, and announcement
of the speaker for the educational
meeting to be held Dec. 25 will be
made.
The daily worker., 1924-12-09
would ProhIbIt Heavy Sacks.

B e RLIN, Dec. s. International
agreements limiting the weight of
filed sacks to $50 lbs. are urged by
the international Union of Workers
in the Food and Drink trades. The
union reports many cases of hernia
and curvature Of spine among work
ers, due in part to reduced vigor
since living standards were forced
down after the war. In most coun-
tries the usual weight of filed sacks
is almost 200 lbs.
The daily worker., 1924-12-09
YOUNG WORKERS LEAGUE.
Tuesday, Dec. 9.

Functionaries' meeting at 2613
Hirsch Blvd. All secretaries, orgaDiz-
ers, educational directors and litera-
ture agents be present. Also. all
comrades who are in charge of shor
nuclei. Program for this meeting
will be:
/. Organization and Trade Union
Economic Work.
2. Shop Nuclei.
DO NOT FAIL TO BE PRESENT.
The daily worker., 1924-12-09
German Capitalists
Fail in Drive to
Crush c Communists

trouble than so and cannot be ar
rested while the Reichstag is In ses-
sion. A section OF the bourgeois press
is now blaming the government for
not completely outlawing the Com
while others hold that the ar
rest and imprisonment Of so many
leading radicals served to martyrize
them.
Generally speaking. the election
was victory for those who support
The daily worker., 1924-12-09
other strlkers Return.

The 1900 strikers at the mines Of
the Lehigh-Wilkes Barre Coal Co.,
were ordered back to work by a meet
ing of their general body, with the
hope" that their differences would
be speedily settled. That action al
lows for the capitalist trinity" to
get in it's work, for it exemplifies that
they have "faith" in something, while
charity" is always needed by workers
who give away their birthright. Yes,
faith, hope and charity always keep
the worker in want, while the axiom
of the employer is, Power to take
and have plenty"
However, this general body is re-
ported to have gone on record as con-
demning the action of the officials in
revoking the charters of the Penn
sylvania Co. strikers, and also in favor
of the calling of a special convention
for the purpose Of considering all the
grievances existing in the district Of
which there are more than plenty.
The daily worker., 1924-12-09

thing in anything but a serious mood,
and laugh of the suggestion that their
general grievance committees will be
outlawed. They confess ignorance of
the many Lewis crimes against the
miners, and steadfastly refuse to
even concede the possibility of such
a thing happening. Many stjI retain
their faith in Cappellini be sause he
formerly belonged to the socialist
party, because he formerly acted like
a rebel and chiefly because he is the
one who is responsible for the exist
ance of the general bodies. They at
tach no significance to the fact that
ne IS absent at time vheE he ought
to be in the midst of this fight to pro
tect their interests.
The daily worker., 1924-12-09

PATTERSON, N. J.-"Absolute pa
triotism" is to be exacted from every
man in Paterson, declares the
women's Independent republican
league Of the city. Particular atten-
tion is to be paid to men who fall to
salute the flag by removing their hats
to military parades.