The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1924-05-23
THE ALIBI
ARTISTS
A Ekele ton Record Of
Cases Tried By
Judge SchuIdt
Bg DONALD NIcDOUGAL.
: Sidewalk Drivers.

corner of New Jersey avenue and
III street getting the report of
collision that had Just happened
at New Jersey avenue and X,
your honor, when heard q crash.
and looked up in time to see a
Hudson touring car jump the curb
and head for me at speed THE
just about gave me time to drop
the receiver and hop IN front of
a Ford sedan galloping over the
sidewalk from H street. -
The Question Of the Day.
About the only chance had.
was to climb the pole the box was
fastened to, only / was afraid the
Ford man would knock II down
and get me anyhow. The iron
fence at the corner saved me a
trim to the moFgue by not break
y ing when the sedan landed on It,
and ! asked the drivers for tier
permits.
Ho, Hum!
1.-THE Hudson man had just fin:
ished explaining why he didn't
have his with .him--Alibi Nunl er
s16, your. hOnor--left It home
when / heard another crash and
there were two autos and a Ford
all mixed up on the car trae ks,
and WI, b. & A. train sISidding
at them from fifty-fooL start.
That's. q pretty busy corner, and
If have to report all the col.
lisions there I'm going to take q
night course in stenography."
*(iet q Cup for Him, Hazen.
Witness: Twas running south
on New Jersey avenue, your
honor, and slowed UP to threasor
four miles an hour when / APP.
preached the car tracks on.t II
street. Then / saw the defendant
coming from my left at about
fourteen miles an hour. / was.
going so slow / couldn't stop and
ran up on the sidewalk, cut be.
tween the call box and the fence,
back on Fl street and jumped the
curb on the other side"
Stranger Than Truth.
The court: THAT was doing
pretty well for q speed of three
miles an hour"
yes sir. / never saw anything
like II before
oh, stranger things than that
often happen in traffic court. How
was your car damaged?"
The left front fender was dent
ed where the Ford struck it."
Should Make Il 10, Anyhow.
Boob: "A street car stopped
ahead of me, your honor, and
there were two machines behind
It. I slowed up and when they
went, ahead I. followed at about
three miles an hour"
How fast?"
Three miles an hour, your
honor"
Sinbad the Chauffeur.
The court: Its difficult to
see how there could be a collision
IL neither car was going more
than three miles an hour. There
pust be a mistake somewhere,
and the case is dismissed
Boob: He hit me in the rear
and bent my right front fender,
THAT can't touch the one you
told about running three miles
an hour. The case Is still dis
missed"
Ran Through Too Soon.
ut was way back last March.
your honor, when was directing
traffic at Eleventh and r, east
and west traffic having the right
OF way. The defendant, driving
Moon car waited q minute or
SO at the south curb line, then
stepped on the gas and went
through the traffic.
yelled at him as he went by
me, and he turned around and
grinned. The driver of a Hudson
car crossing Eleventh street stop.
ped with about an inch to spare
and asked me il l wanted to chase
the man in the Moon.
I'VE followed him at forty milas
an hour to Ninth and G. and /
never did see him again until
yesterday"
Counsel: you don't really know
your
yes SIR"
"How do you identify him2"
BY that grin. He's got the
same one now. only on the other
side of his mouth"
Its a case of mistaken iden-
tity, your honor. The man the
officer saw wasn't my client at
all. But If it was, I'm sure he
didn't intend to violate the law.
He was in a little hurry, that's
ALL"
"A little hurry is a dangerous
thing"
Speeding, $25; disobeying COP. IS.