davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
New Britain herald., 1924-04-03

Contributors 10 the Fun Shop column from readers Of tho Herald will be welcome and all jokes deemed acceptable will be paid for at rates running from s1.O0 to s10.0O, verse at from
 25 cents to s1.00 per line. Any form of humor, providing it has not been published before, will be considered by editor of the Fun Shop column, who has the final say in acceptance. The Herald will forward any New Britain contributions if they are sent to the Fun Shop Editor" care New Britain Herald, city.
New Britain herald., 1924-04-03
F.aBLEGRANfS
(With a bow to Aesop) By Percy Waxman
Tho Ass in the Lions Skin

An Ass once found Lions skin. So. putting it on, he looked in the mirror and said to himself; Every body laughs at me just as soon as they see that I'm an ass. I wonder how they'n treat me in this dis guise."
 So he hurried off to his native Vil- lage to try its effect on the people. Nobody recognized him, and every body was scared to death and fled, leaving him in sole control of the Whole Place.
 Moral:
 Every politician knows the value Of a makeup.
New Britain herald., 1924-04-03
rnINcaRE WINS

Political opponents having bothered him a good deal. Premier Poincare Of Ffamce resigned. But the politicians couldn't fnd satisfactory man 10 succeed him. so they had tO beg him 10 keep his job. Hes back again. stronger than ever.
New Britain herald., 1924-04-03

expedition that soon was to be under- taken.
 He kept his word. When the plans for Lieutenant Wheeler's survey of the New Mexico-Arizona boundary were completed, my long dream finally came true. l was to go with it--as a mule hearder. ,Af. Six of us had to drive 110 shave tail mules down to Santa Fe, where the expedition was 10 start.
 The man in charge didn't like me. I was bubbling over too much with the enthusiasm of youth. So he as- signed me to night herding - the toughest shift.
 There wasn't must time for rest, for I couldn't sleep during the day, while the bunch was on the move; and I couldn't sleep at night while was on duty. We drove down past Fort Bent, Fort Lyons southwest to Trinidad, through Raccoon Pass, where Dick Wootah's night herdors held sway. It was a wild country and cattle thieves were rampant. So they armed me with an old-fashioncd Spanish spen- cer carbine, and gave me orders to shoot on sight without warning. Ono night l almost shot the boss herder when he sneaked up on to sec if I was asleep.
 An escort of soldiers went with us part of the way. One of them came to me one evening and told me that there were snakes in his cot. went to beat them out. The next day l was the laughing stock of the camp. The man had delerium tremens-and | didD't know what they were.
 Between this drunk and the wild mules had to handle, l was driven hard.
 Finally we reached sante Fe, and I joined the expedition. proper, going with the Wheeler forces as a packer.
New Britain herald., 1924-04-03
IInCI,II


 Hooch figures largely in the week's news.
 New Jersey not0riously is the home of trusts. Jersey bootleggers conspir- cd 'in restraint Of trade" to keep Pennsylvania booze from competing with their states home product. Re- suit. a moonshiners' quarrel which the Jersey courts are trying as a liquor graft case.
 Congressman Langley of Kentucky has been indicted on liquor graft charges. Former National Dry Com missioner Kramer escaped indictment by testifying against Langley, the grand jury announced. Sergeant at Arms Rodgers Of the United States house Of representatives is Investigating the story Of an at- tack. in the house office building, by drunken congressman on a girl stenoErapher.
 J. r. Johnson. lawyer for the na- tional dry unit. has been arrested, ac- cBsod or being partner in a plan 10 start a brewery.
 ". ". Arderson. formcr New York statr Anti-SaIoon league superinten- dent. began q penitentiary term for erafting.
New Britain herald., 1924-04-03

You can also judge a man by the character Of those who say he is clean as a hounds tooth.
New Britain herald., 1924-04-03
rwn n1IERs E1nED

Greece has deposed King George. Persia has deposed Shah Ahmed Mir za. Greece is going 10 be a republic. Persia gave the crown 10 Ahmed's son, a twO-year-old baby.
New Britain herald., 1924-04-03

1T he Hunks it may mean that he Is a 300 hitter and that the college wishes to keep him another year.
New Britain herald., 1924-04-03
Winkin'. Klinkin'. and Nod
His Move Next

He: Don't you think this bench would be more comfortable if it had a back"
 She: "I think arms would make it just as comfortable"
 -Tennyson J. Daft.
New Britain herald., 1924-04-03

Correct this sentence: When we go out in our car" said he, "we never fail to invite our friends who haven't one"
New Britain herald., 1924-04-03

It is too early yet to tell who will annex the North pole or the southern delegates.
New Britain herald., 1924-04-03

Valor is the quality that enable a man to lay down a nickel when the check girl surrenders his hat.
New Britain herald., 1924-04-03

If mud is really good for the com plexion, politicians should be able to put better face on things this year.
New Britain herald., 1924-04-03

Experience is dear teacher. The easy payment plan adopted by many pupils is called alimony.
New Britain herald., 1924-04-03

The true test of ehivalry is 10 remove your hat in an elevator after you get bald.
New Britain herald., 1924-04-03

It is too much. however, to hope for a house cleaning and tax reduction every four years
New Britain herald., 1924-04-03

In estimating men, always remem- Der that it is the green driver who toots his horn so much.
New Britain herald., 1924-04-03

A bachelor is man who can come in at 2 a. m. without noticing that his shoes squeak.
New Britain herald., 1924-04-03

Colonel Goatee describes a Yankee as man who uses more "g's' and less liquor.
New Britain herald., 1924-04-03

Sophistication may save you from dangerous crooks, but only native horse sense will help you at danger ous curves.
New Britain herald., 1924-04-03

Copyright. 1s2I Reproduction
 Forbidden)
New Britain herald., 1924-04-03

The only profitable advertising med .um T the City. Circulation h0ot, and piess room alHays open 10 ad srtisers.
New Britain herald., 1924-04-03
rhn ass,c,aten Press

Mer,bri ot The Assaeiated Press. The AsSDciated Press m exclusively ertitlcj to the use fef re-punIication of all news credited to it Lot othe'wise credited in this paper and also local news pub lishcd her iein.
New Britain herald., 1924-04-03
Polished Ebony

Cornered recently before going to court, Martin W. Littleton told this story in the corridor:
 They were pulling off a William Tell stunt down. where came from and Williams son fell il,. The man agcr got a negro boy to take the sons place.
 ."You stand over there" he ex- claimed, "and the champion rifle shot will shoot an apple off your head"
 What's Dat?" demanded the ne- go. "Who is gpine to shoot what off whose haid?"
 Some people speak from experience. Others from experience - don't speak.
New Britain herald., 1924-04-03
Nn sfNnAY COLE

Mayor Eeudrick Of Philadelphia has stopped playing Sunday golf. There's law against it. Kendrick says the avs ought 10 be obeycd even 1T they are silIy.
New Britain herald., 1924-04-03
Tx2@s ) .z7a9YSk!!qb Yk Z!
 MAXSON l0xHALL JsUEL
,XsON MxHLL NDHx
The Inquisitiye Reporter

Our Inquisitiye Reporter yesterday asked this question of three people chosen at random:
 Do you regard the Hegelian en- piricism, taken in the light of Von Clausewitz's metabolism, as priori indicative of subconscious confiict--- making due allowance, of course, for inherited predilections?
 Gustav K. Tannenbaum, paper hanger. Tt all depends on how much yeast you use. Some likes it less yeasty and some likes it more. I get the best results by skimming every three days. It depends how you like it.
 Florence Weemick, stenographer. No, I prefer Rudolph Valentino. I didn't see Lightnin', but I hear John Barrymore was just lovely in it." '- Oscar Eisenberg, plumber. No spik Englis."
 Winkin'. Klinkin'. and Nod Women remain the. puzzle Of our
 life,
 But this he knows who knows he
 never knows them Keep your eyes open, looking for a
 wife,
 For when you've got her, you will
 have to close them
 The Stroller.
New Britain herald., 1924-04-03

The Herald is on sale dsily in New foIk al Hotalngs News Stand, Times squsre;s Schultz News Stand. Entrance Grand Central. i2nj Street
 Los Angeles. Cal: Arcade Station.
New Britain herald., 1924-04-03

TELEPHONE CALLs:N Business Office ............ ezb Editorial Rooms ............ s.e
New Britain herald., 1924-04-03
SUBSCRIPTION RATES:

Entered at the Post oYire at New Britain as Second Class Mai Matter.
New Britain herald., 1924-04-03
New Britain Herald

HERALD PUBLISHING COMPANY Issued Daily tSuudsy EIrspi-d) At Herald Bldg. e Church Street. SUBSCRIPTION RATES: sssU 8 Year.
 s2.00 rhIes Munths
 75c Month.
New Britain herald., 1924-04-03
Membe, Audit Bm.au 0, Circulation.

The A. B., C. s unr'OnaI organization winch furnsfes newsl'epeis sud sdver- fisefs with P strictly honest analysis Of circulation. Our circulation siatlstiCs are based upuL thls audit Thr tnSures pic- tection against fraud in npwspapsr dis tributiop figures to both DAticnal ana local advertisers.
New Britain herald., 1924-04-03

(rn his next article Doheny will tell of his first tnste of prospecting)
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1924-06-11
Where the Money Comes From

given, that by virtue of the power of
sale contained in said mortgage, and
pursuant to the statute made and
provided, the said mortgage will be
foreclosed by sale of the premises de-
scribed in and conveyed by said mort
gage, viz;
The Southwest Quarter (S.W. ~
of Section Twenty (29) Town
ship One Hundred and Ten (110),
North Of Range Thirty-seven go
West of the Fifth (5th) Principal
Meridian, containing One Hundred and
Sixty (160) acres, according to the
government survey thereof, situated
in Redwood County, State of Mime
sofa with the hereditaments and ap-
purtenances; which sale will be made
by the Sheriff of said Redwood County,
at the front door of the Court House,
in the City of Redwood Falls in said
County and State, on Thursday, the
10th day Of July 1924, at o'clock p.
M. of that day, at public vendue, to
the highest bidder for cash, to pay
said debt of Eight thousand seven
hundred twenty-five and 75-100 Dol
lars, and interest, and the taxes, if
any, on said premises, and One Hun
dred Dollars ($100.00) Attorneys fee
as stipulated in and by said mortgage
in case of foreclosure and the disburse-
ments allowed by law; subject to a
Sheriff's certificate of sale of a first
mortgage in the sum of Eight Thou
sand, Three Hundred and Fourteen
and 15-10O Dollars ($S,314.15) the
redemption Hereunder will expire
August 9th, 1924. Said sale herein
will be subject to redemption at any
time within one year from the day of
sale, as provided by law.
Dated: May 18th, 1924.
C.. A. Swanson,
Assignee of Mortgage.
Henry Ebert,
Attorney for Assignee of Mortgage,
1901 Plymouth Building,
Minneapolis, MINI. 45-6ts.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1924-06-11

bile, especially it's use at night by
parties parking on the rural high
ways and on the streets and public
places distant from the built-up por-
tions of the towns and villages, which
parkings are commonly known as pet
ting parties and
whereas, the grand jury has de-
termined that if more stringent laws
are passed by the legislature of the
state in reference to the parking OF
cars upon said highways at night and
without lights, that the same would
have a wholesome effect in the re-
duction of the crime above referred
to.
"Now, therefore, believing that this
matter should be called to the atten-
ton Of the legislature and of the re-
representatives. therein from this county
and district, we do hereby direct that
a copy of this resolution be forwarded
to the Representatives from this coun-
ty to our state legislature, and also
to the senator from this district and
also copy to the governor of the
state, with request that the same,
with his recommendations, be trans
mitted to the legislature of the state
at its next general session for their
consideration and action"
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1924-06-11
States Mari Beds

An additional source of revenue to
the state will be developed if plans
now under consideration for the leas-
ing of lands with mari deposits ma
terialize, according to Ray p. Chase,
state auditor.
Northern Minnesota is rich with
mari deposits and present plans are
to lease these lands to persons wish
ing to dig this valuable fertilizer for
distribution among farmers of the
state, Mr.. Chase said.
Many of these mari deposits are
found in swampy land and in the
beds of meandered lakes, which would
be a direct revenue to the state if
the deposits could be mined on a
royalty basis, state officials said.
Mr.. Chase is now working on plans
whereby he could lease these lands
for mining of the valuable fertilizer,
and he hopes actual work of distri-
button will be started at an early date.
Everything will be done that is
possible to secure for the farmers of
the state a supply of this much need
ed fertilizer" Mr.. Chase said. "The
rates of royalty and the terms of the
leases are to be as reasonable as pos
sible so as to insure the early opera
ton of the deposits and to secure a
fair return to the trust funds to which
the lakes belong"
A number of applications have been
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1924-06-11
Backache Is DiscOur-
aging
But Not So Bad If You Know How to
Reach the Cause.

Nothing more discouraging than a
constant backache. Lame when you
awaken, pains pierce you when you
bend or lit. It's hard to work or to
rest. Backache often indicates bad
kidneys and calls for prompt treat
ment. The best recommended remedy
is Doan's Pills. Profit by this nearby
residents experience:
j. S. McCorkell, Wabasso, says: 81
was troubled great deal with back
ache and every time l stopped, sharp
pains darted into the small of my
back. The muscles across my kidneys
were drawn and sore and l felt tired
and all worn out. My kidneys did not
act often enough and the secretion
burned intensely in passage. / start
ed using Doan's Pills and one box
gave ME much relief. was rid of
the backache and my kidneys acted
regularly again. Doan's cured me
of kidney trouble and made me feel
better all over"
Price &C., at all dealers. Don't
simply ask for kidney remedy-get
Doan's Pills-the same that Mr.. Nc
Corkell had. Foster-Milburn Co.,
Mfrs, Buffalo, N. Y.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1924-06-11
FrOWns on
Petting Parties

"Petting parties" are frowned on
by the grand jury in Watonwan coun-
ty. At its recent sitting that body
adopted the following "whereases and
resolution:
Whereas, the grand jury of Wa
tonwan county convened for the May,
1924, general term of the district
court of said county in its investiga-
ton of crimes committed in the coun-
ty, from the nature and character of
the offenses which have been COM
mitted, have determined that one of
the predominating causes for the COM
mission of large amount of the
crimes that seem to be prevalent and
affecting the morals, conduct and ha-
bits of the young people, grows out
of the improper use of the automo-
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1924-06-11
May 21-June Is.
Notice Of Mortgage
Foreclosure Sale

Default having been made in the
payment of the sum of Eight thousand
seven hundred twenty-five and 75-1OC
Dollars, which is claimed to be due
and is due at the date of this notice
upon certain Mortgage, duly execut-
ed and delivered by Frank Link and
Mary Link, his wife Mortg agors, to
j. P. Full Mortgage, bearing date
the 9Th day of February 1920, and
with power Of sale therein contain
ed, duly recorded in the office of the
Register of Deeds in and for the
County of Redwood and State of Min
nesota, on the 9th day of March 1920,
at 3:45 o'clock P. NJ, in Book 70 of
Mortgages, on page 585.
Which said Mortgage, together with
the debt secured thereby, was duly
assigned by said j. P. Full Mortgage,
to c. j. Swanson by written assign
ment dated the 25th day of June 1920,
and recorded in the office of said
Register of Deeds, on the 14th day of
April 1928, at 9 o'clock A. NJ, in Book
65 of Mortgages on page 553.
Which said Mortgage, together with
the debt secured thereby, was duly
assigned by said C. j. Swanson the
Assignee and Holder thereof, to C.
A. Swanson by written assignment
dated the 10th day of April 1928, and
recorded on the 18th day of April
1924, at 9:15 o'clock A. NJ, in Book
IS of Mortgages page 581 in the Of
flee OF the said Register of Deeds and
no action or proceedings having been
instituted, at law or otherwise, to
recover the debt secured by said Mort
gage or any part thereof.
That the default above described
consists as follows;
That whereas, the said mortgage
was given to secure the payment of a
promissory note, dated February 9Th
1920 for the sum of Seven Thousand,
Five Hundred Dollars ($7500.OO), pay
able on or before five 90 years after
date with interest at the rate of five
(5) per cent per annum, payable
annually.
And that whereas said mortgagors
covenanted and agreed among other
things in said mortgage IF default
be made by the said mortgagors, in
any of the foregoing provisions, it
shall be lawful for the said MORTGAGE,
his heirs, executors, administrators or
assigns, or his attorney to declare the
whole sum above specified to be due
and payable"
And that whereas said mortgagors
have made default in the payment of
the annual interest of Three Hundred
and Seventy-fve Dollars ($375.OO) of
said note which became due and pay
able on the fifth day of February 1922,
and the annual interest of Three Hun
dred and Seventy-fve Dollars
($375.00) on said note which became
due and payable on the fifth day of
February, 1923 and also the annual
interest of Three Hundred and Seven
ty-five Dollars ($375.00) of said note
which became due and PAYABLE IN IN ~ -. :
...... Jay OF repruary 1924; and that
the default in the payment of said
three annual interests has ever since
existed and still does exist and that
by reason of such failure to pay said
interest, said G. A. Swanson, assignee
of said mortgage, has elected and does
hereby elect to declare the whole sum
secured by said mortgage to be now
due and payable.
Now, therefore, notice is hereby
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1924-06-11
May 28-June Ali
ORDER LIMITING TIME TO FILE
CLAIMS, AND FOR HEARING
THEREON.

CLAIMS, AND FOR HEARING
THEREON.
ESTATE OF WILLIAM H. HUNT.
State of Minnesota, }
County of Redwood
In Probate Court.
In the Matter of the Estate of VII
liam H. Hunt, Decedent.
Letters of Administration this day
having been granted to George A..
Barnes;
1T is ORDERED, That che time
within which all creditors of the above
named decedent may present claims
against his estate in this Court, be,
and the same hereby is, limited to six
months from and after the date here
of; and that Monday, the oath day of
November, 1924, at 1000 o'clock a. M,
in the Probate Court Rooms at the
Court House in the City of Redwood
Falls in said County, be, and the same
hereby is, fixed and appointed as the
time and place for hearing upon and
the examination, adjustment and al
lowance of such claims as shall be
presented within the time aforesaid.
Let notice hereof be given by the
publication of this order in the Red
wood Gazette as provided by law.
Dated May 22nd., 1924.
A. R. A. Laudon,
Judge of Probate.
COURT SEAL) 46-3ts.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1924-06-11

open for mining, farmers of the state
will derive direct benefit of the
low cost of the farm land stimulant.
Mr.. Chase did not indicate the am
cunt of royalty to be charged per ton
on the mari mined. He expects to be
in position to announce the prices
at an early date.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1924-06-11

made and it is expected that leases
will have been completed by the time
the lakes and swamps are liberated
from the grip of winter, Mr.. Chase
said.
The value of mari as a fertilizer is
well known in agricultural circles,
and if the deposits no state lands are
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1924-06-11

A free country is one in which you
can hate man of another faith, even
if you don't practice your own religion.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1924-06-11

A genius is man who can teach a
child to hate war and to adore war
heroes.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1924-06-11
81 Got Real Mad When l Lost My
Setting Hen" Mrs. Hannah.

morning and found my favorite setter
dead. / got real mad. Went to the
store h hc.st some RAT-SNAP and
in a week ! got Six a aea rats. Every
body who raises poultry should keep
RAT-SNAP." Three sizes, 35c, Csc,
$125. Sold and guaranteed by Far
rel & Keefe and Public Drug Co.
4-2ts.
The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1924-06-11
BOARD OF DIRECTORS

X. A. Cooper
MN. G. NJ. Smith
D. w. Gold
E. l.. Gauea
". G. " eldon
The daily worker. [volume] (Chicago, Ill.) 1924-1958, 1924-11-22
For God and Country Day

men laid off, and hours heightened,
sending thousands of more women and
children into industries in an attempt
to keep starving families alive.
The Solution.
In Soviet Russia on the other hand.
anti-working class propaganda is not
permitted as it is in America. The
children of Soviet Russia are taught
that their interests are the interests
of keeping the working class, which
produces all wealth, in control OF the
government.
There is but one solution to the
problems of illiteracy, and child labor,
malnutrition and militaristic, anti
working class propaganda. The CAPT
talist class of America, which owns
the Coolidge government, and burdens
the workers with the system of wage
slavery, also dominates the public
schools. The capitalist class consi-
ders control of the minds of the chill
dren of this country necessary to the
continuation of the profit system.
Communists Led Fight.
The Workers (Communist) Party of
America has led the fight against the
control of the public schools by the
manufacturers and exploiters of labor.
When the working class of America
takes over the industries and govern
ment of this country and runs the in
dustries for the use of the workers.
abolishing the profit system-then the
school children will be freed from the
grip of the master class.
The issue is working class control
of industry and government, and work
ers education versus capitalistic pro-
paganda.