davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-09
1JPHOLDING THE LAW IN ILLINOIS

An Illinois girl alleges she joked with three policemen when they arrested her brother for violating a traffic ordinance, and they broke her nose The policemen claim she bit, kicked and scratched them and they broke her nose Of course, if she really did become re- calcitrant, there was nothing for the three great big, brave and burly cops to do with little girl like her but break her nose. The ma iesty of the law must be upheld, and, as T matter of fact, they have some even stranger ways than that of upholding it in Illinois Nashville Banner.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-09

It is hard to tell what the outcome will be, but if the Republicans are found guilty of the bombing attempt, popular reaction will perhaps set in towards the Democrats and compel the calling of a convention. M
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-09
WHAT PA SAID

"So you have get twins at your house. said Mrs. Besumbe to little Tommy.
 Yes, ma am, two of 'em."
 What are you going to call them?" Thunder and Lightning
 "Why, those are strange. names to call chil- dren.'
 well, that's what Pa called them as soon as he heard they were in the house -Phil- adelphia Ledger.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-09
Assertlng His NTanhood

I love my wife-I admit it.
 am always willing to share (and do share ) my most valued possessions with her. There is scarcely anything under the sun wouldn't get her-if have the price.
 Only one thing I will positively not do.
 And that is to loan her my new golfing knickers when she goes on hike.-Sinbad
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-09
Back Home Again

Peggy reports that she had such stupid time on her vacation. She was saved from drowning three times, once by a porter, once by a champion woman swimmer, and once by married man on his honeymoon.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-09
Office Wanted

Office Wanted He shook my hand And slapped my back; Then he called me ''Attaboy Jack" He asked me how n The kids progressed In school and said I looked my best. With Give regards to x Wife and Mother" And Please remember me To Brother" he handed me A big cigar; the worst I've Ever smoked, by far, And complimented my complexion, This candidate For fall election.
 James E. Fcsler.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-09

An Oklahoma judge has deprived the wife of millionaire of the use of her car for four months because she drove it while intoxicated. Haven't women equal rights with men in that state?
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-09
Makes a DiffarAncn

Mildred: Wasn't Stella's husband a wealthy man when she married him, dear ?'
 Betty: Goodness, yes But you must re- member he's. been her husband for over two years now !"-Rodney Lawson.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-09

The alienists agree that Leopold and Loeb are perfectly matched for career of crime. We presume the inference is that it is pity they were so rudely in- terrupted in their career.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-09
Didn't Have the Heart

Old Gentleman (severely) "Do you be- lieve in accepting tips?"
 Porter: Well, sah, since yo' has suggested it, An jes' kaint refuse. Roy Scott.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-09
TIle Wise Yonth

Flapper (to country youth while looking out of the twelfth-story window of New York skyscraper) "The boys all fall for me-
 Country Youth Ca bit perplexed) T don't think I'd take the chance. ."-Margaret Reed
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-09

He feeds on mountain, lakes art galleries, famous promenades, oversized statues, arches of triumph, palaces, towers and horses that Napoleon once rode. Taking them all while he runs and stopping only for fresh direc- tions at Cooks.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-09

Three Rhode Islanders have been in- dicted for releasing deadly gas in the state senate chamber. They should have been members and thus have had im- munity,
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-09
CONFIRMING HIS FEARS

Bulgaria is reported to be mobilizing, thus confirming Governor Bryan's fears that Ma tional Defense Day would be lnterpreted sbrood as war gesture.-Kansas City Times
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-09

He takes three cathedrals immediately upon rising two old abbeys on a glass of cold water after breakfast, four heaping museums before luncheon, and dozen historic ruins (well powdered) before and after dinner. And repeats until helpless.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-09

MT. Lewis predicts another mine war in West Virginia. He has already dis played peculiar gift of prophecy in such matters.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-09
All That Mattered

The fortune teller bent low over her crystal. T see your future husband" she announced presently. He is short and ugly" Why, the idea !''
 he has red hair and freckles-" He cannot be my
 and he eats with his knife." "Yop horrid creature!'
 "But--he is a millionaire" "Oh! How perfectly lovely! And when shall meet the darling?"-R. s. Parrish.
 tcoDyriEht. 1924, Reproduction forbiddsnJ
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-09

u the choice were left to me, whether to nave free press or 8 free government, l would choose free press.--Thomas Jefferson.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-09
The JingIe.JangIe Counter

Her lovely teeth were glistening white As they lay on her bureau through the night.
 -Blois Houghton. Spuds in the cellar, hams on the fire, This will inform you that fish don't perspire.
 Charles $. Robinson. A minute here, and minute there, Keeps one from getting anywhere.
 A. Leona Margitan.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-09

MT. LaFollette has announced that he will run in Wisconsin as an "indepen- dent progressive" Nobody denies that he is independent. It is the other half of the bracket concerning which there is
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-09

Our Johnny is a scrapper He never will be good, And I think it's all because We feed him Devils food.
 Richard Greenfield.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-09
Not an InsuperabIe Obstacle

Father (to prospective employer of his son) "Of course, you will remember that my boy is a college graduate"
 Prospective Employeri Don't let that worry you. am willing to overlook it."- Elias Lieberman.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-09

England has made another trade pact with Russia. She ought to have several more in readiness to take the place of each one as it is broken.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-09

The alienists report that Chicago's ia vorite murderers are neither sane noi insane That ought to clarify matters.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-09
DROUTH RACES WITH COTTON

The annual relay between Old Man Drouth and the boil weevil keeps the price of twO-bit socks up dime.-Dallas News.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-09

Wheeler may be a progressive. but he went back on us Demoerats.-Dallas News.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-09

EXCLUSIVE ALABAMA MEMBER OF NORTH AMERICAN NEWSPAPER ALLIANCE.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-09

Telephone (private branch exchange connect ing all departmentsl. Main 1900.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-09

"see Europe Between Meals" is his motto No waiting IF
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-09

Crops Need Rain. IA good rain would not come amiss now. Tho roads are suffo- catingly dusty and the crops are beginning to show effects of q moisture shortage. With the coming of the new month perhaps we will get more preciptation.-Florence News.
 How the Candidates Look.-We'ye been looking over the phizzes of the several pairs of party leaders lined up for the forthcom- ing election and we are frank to say that If we had to leave our business or our family with any of them Rb'p pick Johnny Davis and Daddy Bryan in preference to the austere Coolidge and the debonair Dawes, or the bucolic LaFollette and his yacillating mate, Wheeler.-Baldwin Times.
 Anthrax As a Crime-Antbrax is killer for both man and beast, and in view of its presence in some Southern states, all possi- ble aid to the authorities should be given to keep it away from everywhere, especially our home state.. Let us look upon anthrax, not so much disease as a crime, for it is criminal carelessness not to do everything in our power to prevent its spread,rrp pemopolis Times.
 Dothan Wants the Highway. Every little while the alarming report comes to town that effort is being made to have the high way commission extend the road coming into Geneva, on south of Dothan, toward the proposed Alaga bridge. Road construction goes where it serves the most people, and we don't believe there's anything in the report that road will circle south of town, going no place, when it is generally known that the people in all this section wish to go or come through Dothan, when they get that near.-- Dothan Eagle.
 A Short Cut to Riches.-+The trouble last week was on the transmission line between Dothan and Columbia. Some say storm blew down a number of the poles. We were told, however, that the poles were pecked down by red-head sapsuckers and that wood lice eat them up before the company could get them back up. Dr. Thrower and the ed- itor have about completed arrangements for purchasing couple of Fordson tractors and trailers When the transaction is completed we shall be in the market for ,ight-wood stumps, from which we shall manufacture splinters. Maybe then Enterprise people can have some sort of light at night. No stock will be for sale in the company, as Dock and ourself feel sure that we'll both get rich in short Enterprise Ledger
 
 Bumper Crops in Crenshaw.-The past ten days has been ideal cotton weather, and the indications are now that a big cotton crop will be made in the county this year. The stalks are already full of bolls, and it will not be many more days before the bolls will begin to open and the cotton picking will begin Many farmers of the county say that more cotton will be made this year than for several years, and that there are already enough bolls on the stalk to insure more cot ton than was made last year. The boil weevil has done his damage this year, but the farm CTS have fought him good and hard and the devastation from the weevil has not been as much this year as it was last year. The corn crop is also promising, and the indications are that bumper corn crop will also be made.--Crenshaw County News.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-09

Europe is dotted with agencies devoted to seeing that American amateur travellers get through the old world right-side up, "as di- rected" and with name and address written plainly on both sides" No tourist bureau will be responsible for any green tourist whose return address is not stamped in his or her upper right-hand corner. sa4
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-09
THE ACE.HER AID

Entered at Birminghahanl. Ala, post office as oscond-class natter act of Congress, March 1879
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-09

MEMBER OF ASSOCIATED PREss-The As. soeiAted Press is exclusively entitled to the use Tor publication of all news dispst tches credited to t. or ret otherwise credited in this paper and ESQ local news published therein. All rights ot Republication of special dispatches are also
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-09

The agency tourist travels for quick re suits. He is gazelle for speed and stuffed moose for endurance.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-09

And, judging by reports, the hotel men can take them" in more senses than one.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-09

 l OYER
Seeing Europe in Twenty Minutes

Americas exports of amateur travellers are back to .pre-war figures Statistics for the past few months show more Americans de- veloped fallen arches tramping through Euro pean curiosity zones than at any time since 1914. Once again the syndicate tourist agen- cies are making deliveries of ppp-eyed U. s. travellers in bulk as fast as European hotel men can, take them.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-09

American tourists spend two-thirds of their European trips in these tourist agencies get ting itemized instructions how to reach the next town in good condition. Agents who are bears for patience hold maps right-side up for them, translate the timetables, outline tomor- rows weather, tell which side of the train the sun will be on next Friday and advise whether a traveller gets more comfort sleep ing on his side or back on a French railroad.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-09

SUBSCRIPTION RATES-By mall, payable In tdyance, In United States and Canada: Daily three months. $2.25 one month 9bc. Daily only. One year. $6.5O; six months, S3.25: three months. $1.75; one month. 76c. Sunday only; One year. $2.5o; six months. $16o; three months 70, one monthh, 25c.
 By carrier. where carrier delivery is main- tained 2Vc per week. s5c per month.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-09
aIEEl aIEElE.A1L-ABAMA| IElE
 g4gz5aIP 5aIPRES S|
INIQNsS QEa aQIFIER

Crops Need kain. IA good rain would not come amiss now. Tho roads are suffo- catingly dusty and the crops are beginning to show effects of moisture shortage. With the coming of the new month perhaps we will get more preciptation.-Florence News.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-09

NEWS BUREAUs-washington, 800 Davidson Buildins; State Capital, Montgomery Journal Building; Tennessee Valley, Decatur Albany; Tuscaloosa, News Building; Jasper, Mountain Eagle Building; Admission, Star Building; Gads- den. Journal Building; Muscle Shoals TIi-Cities Daily Building.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-09

Other information sought and supplied at all chain travel bureaus follows:
 What to take in Belgium for a cold in the head in Spain. .
 How to check Scotch terrior on a through trip to Italy.
 What time it will be in Perth Amboy, N. J., when it is Friday afternoon in Genoa.
 Whether it is possible for an English speak ing tourist leaving Switzerland to get an American porous plaster in Germany.
 How to ask for frankfurters and beans in Portuguese.
 Whether Hartz mountain canary can be shipped across the Alps without changing cages.
 Are there cannibals in Switzerland?
 What do pajamas cost in Nice at the present rate of exchange? Are people ex- changing many pajamas this, season?
 Service is these agencies pet passion. The clerks thrive on foolish questions to answer
 European travel broadens a man. If also flattens a man.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-09
PROGRESSING BACKWARDS

Copyright. 1924 Reproduction forbidden,
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-09

FREDERICK THOMPSON. 4. PRESIDENT
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-09

It also flattens a man.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-09

Service is these agencies pet passion. The clerks thrive on foolish questions to answer.
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1924-03-09
Managers Will Follow Out
Plans They Had Made
for Saturday.
ROSENTHAL MAY PLAY
Coleman Plans to Use New
Outfielder for Two or
Three Innings.

Cheated Of their first look at the
Boston Red SoI and San Antonio
Bears in actual combat Saturday aft
ernoon by that old favorite Jupiter
Pluvius, who never waits for his cue
before stepping onto the stage, local
fans will have their initial opportun-
ity Sunday afternoon to choke on a
peanut while trying to yell "whee" and
get an ear sprayed with tobacco juice
during home-team rally.
Ladies ard gentlemen" somebody
will enunciate-maybe Umpire Cap
Ieidy-at 3 o'clock sharp, and the
fray will begin.
A look at the lineups above will
show that the Sox ought to win. An
other look will show that the Boston
lineup Sunday will not be far differ
ent from that with which Lee Foil
hopes to open the season.
But Bob Coleman, the Bruin boss,
says his pitchers have responded 10
the fine weather of the last week and
are in good shape and the BEARS are
likely to claw EN-" Still another look
at those lineups discloses the fact that
the San Antonio club will be no puny
aggregation from a hitting standpoint.
Babe" Herman, borrowed from Bos-
ton to play first base pending the ar
rival of Jim Galloway, can larrup the
bali with the best of them, Dick
Reichle is a celebrated slugger, young
Leo Najo has been lambasting the ap-
pie in a delightful fashion in all Bear
practice sessions, Bill Warwick hi
any number of homers and triples ur
in the Michigan Ontario League, and
nobody is going to say that Fuller and
Meyers and Brovold and Longnecker
can't hit. The youngsters who will
occupy the mound for the pink-skinned
tribe will have no cinch.
Some Swatters to Face.
On the other hand, the cublets who
trundle to the hill for the home gang
must face Lee and Wambssanss and
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1924-03-09

veach and Harris and Boone and
Todt and-oh, what's the use? But
Bob Coleman says they'he ready and
the boys are all primed to give the big
leaguers battle. Who are Veach and
Harris and these guys, anyhow?
The fans will get look at practi-
eally everybody on the Boston squad.
Coleman will make few changes in
the course Of the fray, also.
One will be the substitution for two
or three innings late in the game of
Simon Rosenthal, newly-arrived out
fielder. for one of the starting garden
ers. Rosenthal, who comes by way of
Boston from the Eastern League, has
had only one practice here and is not
ready for full game yet. But there's
lots of interest in the the lad and the
local management wants to parade him
Sunday, for little while, at least.
81 takes a lusty poke at the whirl-
ing sphere. A youngster, he has been
a natural slugger from the day he
broke in. When he gets polished ways
in other departments of the game, he
doubtless will become a big Lacquer
for Bob Quinn's Bostonese.
Everett Booze, who reached town
Cutufudy hioIHlis, Will NC III uulIVI III.
If he feels fit he may appear for a
short time in the game.
The Sox will get out to the park
early Sunday. probably around noon,
so that all the squad can get some
work. Thirty-five players arc entirely
too many to be damned even into the
first exhibition game of the season and
those who don't get q turn at bat in
the game will want some exercise.
The Bears will not hold their usual
morning drill but will warm up for an
hour or so before game time.
Movies and Golf.
Saturday was a dull day In both
training camps. The movies profited
by the layoff. The Sox went to the
park, found the grounds "soupy" from
the morning drizzles and returned 10
their hotel. Some few took little
limbcring-up practice out by the club
house. The Bears made no attempt to
work.
San Antonio's widely-advertised sun
peeked around the clouds right after
the Saturday game had been officially
declared off and the afternoon turned
out to be fine one. The result was
a number of baseball golf parties out
at the San Antonio Country Club.
Games with the Red Sox are on the
program for the Bears every Saturday
and Sunday throughout the month oI
March. Early in April, the Austin
team OF the Texas Association will
play two exhibitions here and thu
Bruins will return the compliment fol
a couple Of days at Austin.
Practice affairs between the Regu
lars and the Yannigans will CONT
thick and fast: beginning next week. il
the Boston camp. The first and ONLY
one SO far took place Thursday. Thes,
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1924-03-09
ALAMO-PECKS SIGN
DALLAS SEMI-PROS
FOR FIVE CONTESTS
Victory-Wilsons Coming at
End of August More
Seats at Park.

George Schwab of the Alamo-Peck
Indians, has signed up the Victory
Wilson Baseball Club of Dallas for
five-game series to be played at
Schwab Field here, beginning Satur-
day, August 80, and continuing
through Monday, September 1, which
is Labor Day. One game will be
played Saturday, two Sunday and two
Labor Day.
The Victory Wilson Club was one
of the hardest combinations the In
dams encountered last season and
Schwab is DESTROYS of bringing them
here for a longer series this year.
The three-game series last year end
ed in a tie, one game ending without
a decision.
The Indians will continue to prac-
tice three times a week. The prac-
tice dates are Tuesdays, Thursdays
and Saturdays.
A full nine-inning practice game
following preliminary practice which
begins at 2 o'clock. No admission
will be charged.
On Sunday, March 16, the whole In
dian roster for the season will be
picked, intensive training begun and
the season started on the following
Sunday. Since the signing up of the
Victory-Wilson Club for a later and
bigger series. some other team will
oppose the Indians in their opener.
Several improvements are being
made at the park. The fence on the
east side is being moved back about
80 feet and a grandstand for negroes
built. The total seating capacity of
the Indians plant is to be more than
6000, Schwab says.
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1924-03-09

Bill Warwick is a veteran backstop
at %. He began taking 'em off the
bat before he lost his tenor voice. He
caught for the kids on the corner lot,
then for the high school team, then
for the local amateurs and semi-pros
and finally he went to the University
of Pennsylvania, when he donned the
mask for the freshmen one season and
then caught three years varsity. n
1920 he played with Franklin, Pa. in
the old "Outlaw" Oil League. The
Pittsburg Pirates got him tho next
year. In 1921, they farmed him out
to Birmingham the next year to Co.
lumbia in the South Atlantic and then
to Memphis, and in '23, Pittsburc
sent him to the Flint, Mich, club in
the Michigan-Ontario League. Boss
Benson of the Bears bought him and
his battery-mate, Ted Pritchard. at the
last winter baseball pow-wow. Bill
sort of burnt up the Mich-Ont circuit
last season. He led the catchers in
all-around performances, busted the
ball at .32S clip, hit dozen or SO
homers and a flock of triples and
doubles and was generally the big
noise in Flint. He puts 175 pounds
behind his wallops and the umpire has
to be half inch over six feet to look
him straight in the eye.
Bill isn't his name. He was chris.
tened 1--WE hate to do this, Bill Fer
min. But Bill isn't bit like that ;
he's a tobacco-chewing herman.
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1924-03-09
Baseball Question Box

to be conducted by John B. Fos-
ter, special correspondent of The
San Antonio Light.
In response to many requests
made in former seasons, John b.
Foster, special baseball correspond
ent of The Light, has consented to
answer a limited number of ques-
tons in our Baseball Question
Box.
II you have some questions to
ask about baseball
If you want a rule interpreted
II you want to know anything
about a play or player
Write to John b. Foster, the
man who helped make the rules
under which the game is played
today. If you want a personal
reply. enclose stamped, self-ad-
dressed envelope. Otherwise your
question will be answered in this
column.
Address: John B. Foster. Sre-
cial Baseball Correspondent of The
San Antonio Light, S11 World
Building, New York.
BE sure to read John b. Fos-
ter's daily baseball dispatches and
watch for the Baseball Question
Box.
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1924-03-09
BRECKENRIDGE PARK
WILL BE SCENE OF
SUNDAY POLO FINAL
Field Dry Enough for San
Antonio-Detroit
Contest.

The Breckenridge Park polo field
will be the scene Of the Southwest
circuit cup final match Sunday after
noon between the San Antonio Polo
Club, four and the Detroit team. Jack
Lapham Of the San Antonio Polo
Club, under the auspices of which the
United States Polo Associations dis
trict trophy tournament is being con-
Quoted, announced Saturday night
that, barring more rain, the municipal
field will be in condition for the Sun
day clash.
The San Antonio and Detroit teams
are the survivors of week of vigor-
GUS handicap play. They meet Sunday
without handicaps, however. if regular
lineups are used, since their team
handicaps are identical.
Monday afternoon, at 2 o'clock, a
tournament without handicaps will be
started. The opening games Monday,
two of them, will be played at Har-
bord Field, beyond Camp Travis. Tues.
day afternoon, at 2 o'clock. a double
header will be played at Breckenridge
Park. The finals will take place the
following Sunday. The same teams
which competed in the circuit cup
event will play in the flat" tourna-
ment.