The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1924-04-19

nNAAs 4 % NNtNAt W hAfN NNANAAN
about the starving AmenianH since
1916. cappy replied grudgingiy BE
fore that The TURKS used 20 go forth
and set enough Armenians for a
mess every other week end. even In
peace iimea
why those Armcnians must Be
as prolific az guinea pigs 10 keep on
functioning na objects u charity. and
! cut them and the other Far East.
em babies Of my lat laHt year. I'm
going Ia for German babies eHclus-
lively IN 1894.
How ab0u- the French babies. I
hear a howl for help In that dinee-
ton every little while" Mr.. skinner
observed.
4 LET them roll their own. They
aren't taxing themselves much 10
speak Of and they aren't paying their
bills and their credit limit on my
sympathy was used up In 1919. right
after the peace conference. ] can't
permit them any oyerdmft"
wen. Ireland has been shot 90
pieces ever since 1916. and England.
Scotland and Wales haven't had a
good time since 1914. but they aren't
asking anybody 20 ave their babies.
Cappy. And n anybodys babies de.
serve our attention MS the Irish.
Neglect those babies and New York.
Chicago and san francisco will de-
volop into desert wastes thru inabil.
ity TO control their traffic probiemsl
The Blue Star Navigation company
will be ahy most Of is best chief en-.
gineers and the docks VIII be giutted
with freight. because there VIII be
no Irish foremen 10 make the infer
Tor races IN the Longshoremen's un.
ion step lively"
II might do worse than endow an
ITlah orphan asylum NJ that" cappy
agreed. "of oourne III not be here
10 sec the finished product turned
out. but IS years from now you could
10 90 Dublin. Matt. and contract for
the pick of them 20 nll any good Jobs
we might have lying around loose.
Miss Martin. write 20 the president
OF ireland and ask him TO select a
hundred red.headed Irish war orph.
ans-50 boys and 80 girls. III feed
them and educate them"
He's of again" SIR. Skinner In.
ierrupted.
and bring them 20 the United
States when they ARE full grown and
start a Bigger and Better Families
movement. BY ths Holy Plnk-toed
Prophet. boys. we've got 20 do some.
thing about this baby question.
For cvery Angio-sa1on. Teuton.
celt and Scandinavian that enters
this country. becomes a citizen and
uncoycrs when the flag goes by. we
have half a dozen Of assorted Central.
Southern and Eastern Europeans
somewhat lighter In color than an
English saddle and about as much
use in breeding up Americans as a
tooth brush IN a French family"
Then" Matt 2easlsy suggest
cd. "it isn't the baby question"
ut Il, Matt. These people
come IN six 10 one and breed i,
10 two and thrive on dirt and soft
food like n parrot"
Its the marriage question:
Matt ayerrcd How can We
whoop up our birth rate when
people cannot afford TO get mar
rled9"
well. other nations do Il. Matt
True. And we Americans, who
cannot afford 10 marry and hhs
more than one child II we do marry.
sit around and sob and lament and
dig down into our jeans 20 contri'
butte 20 tho support OF European
babies. And when those babies grow
up they come over here and own
NIL the apartment houses and raise
the rent on the old couple whose
lone child has left them without Wis
lbie means Of support"
"Well, II most marriages now
a-days were made In heaven In
stead Of below decks" Cappy de-
clarcd, II suppose we could nj.
ford to raise BUR own policemen.
But with divorce a. common and
easy Of access as Scotch whisky,
even the folks who get married
prefer n chlldless life on the prin-
ciple that II they should separate
the alimony would only ove
mothers uplseep."
cappy lapsed into Il gentle ehuckle.
Speaking OF those marriages that
are not made In haven" he went on.
reminds me OF Abel Boothby. who
used 10 be a famous lobster fisher
man down East when l was n boy,
In those days when folks married
they married until death did them
part: no matter how much they
fought and suffered and hated each