The Washington times., 1924-04-05
WASHINGTON
WHISPERS
BY POLLY PRY-
My, but 1 am excited!

were really as QreaQIut as Lney
had been pistured.
No one asked me for ticket
to the Senate Gallery. 1t was
quite a relief after the finesse
necessary to get into the COM
mittee rooms. A friendly door
keeper said go right in" and
actually smiled. There wasn't
much to see at first--just a
dozen or so page boys dashing
about with books and calendars
setting the Senatorial desks to
right and incidentally reading all
their private papers as they did
so. The lads did not seem at
all impressed by their surround
ings and shouted across the
length of the chamber. In a
few minutes, though the advance
guard of Senators came in and
the pages settled down.
After q short prayer by the
chaplain who shares the Sena-
torial privilege that no one can
stop when he starts to pray, but
is merciful Notwithstanding, the
fun began.
OminOus Warning.
A Democratic Senator, 1 didn't
recognize him, for he spoke from
under the gallery in which I was
sitting tried hard to prove that
the Investigating Committee had
not hindered the wheels of legis-
lation in the least. Then every
Senator tried to talk at once and
say his committee had not been
halted. There was so much Gag
erness that 1 rather suspected
their morning mail must have
been filled with letters from home
reading: "Quit your fooling and
get down to work."
Senator Lodge stood right up
cool as a New England icicle and
said he thought work had been
neglected. Several Democrats
jumped on him at once, metaphor
cally speaking, Of course. The
Senator kept his best manner up
permost and listened to their
TRADES with an air of kindly
tolerance as if they were naughty
children. 1 think that made them
mad, for they talked worse and
California, a tall, ministerial-look-
ing person, who wore the white
flower of a blameless life in his
lapel, -applauded Senator Lodge
softly and looked disgustedly at
those rude Democrats across the
chamber.
1t was right here I got excited.
The talk was rather boring, I
must confess, and for mental re-
lief l sDanced down at a docu-
ment in my lap. 1t read RE
port of the Secretary of the Sen
ate" and it's mighty rich reading,
too. Under the head of station
ery' an item leaped up at me:
1t was 81 Brides book. So"
A Real Scandal.
I I knew had stumbled upon a
real Senatorial scandal. For 1
. knew no Senator was a bride be-
cause there are no feminine men,
bers in the upper House. Graft"
l shouted to myself.
One dozen Congress whist cards,
three dozen Angel Back cards,
two dozen Bicycle cards, four
bridge pads and 800 game counter
wonder, If that means poker chips.
CHANGING through the account I
saw similar items repeated again
and again and / wondered what
the reformers will do when they
read this live news in my Wash
ington Whispers" expect they
will start an investigation of their
own. Not that l am limiting that
Senators would gamble-dear me,
no-but where there are SO many
cards there's bound to be a little
game or so.
Bride books are not the only
items covering vital statistics as
it were.
Vital Statistics.
CHANGING on through the ex-
pendltures, l saw several charges
for wedding announcements; one
baby announcement" and an
order for bereavement cards, shows
that even when death strikes
Senatorial households they still
remember their stationery privil-
eyes. Social functions find ready
helpers in nicely engraved dinner
and other cards, and in one in.
stance ''debutante" invitations
were paid for by dear old Uncle
Sam, 300 in all, while Christmas
cards galore were furnished on
the Stationery account" Station.
cry is a word that from a Con.
gressional point Of view seems to
be elastic enough to cover every
thing.
And pocketknives! Judging from
the numbers charged they must
nave given them away as pre-.
NUNS to their constituents.
Naughty Senator
wonder what Senator If was
VINO charged q vanity case to his
account. Another Senator bought
on MS stationery account a fifty
dollar English kit bag and there
are dozens of travelling cases.
manicure sets and hand bags
charged up. Imagine a Senator
with a hand bag! Shades of
Patrick Henry and the fathers of
the Republics!
Here are a few other choice
items printed without comment,
leaving the conclusions to the
readers imaginations:
pipts of violet ink.
dozen Jap. book ends.
Innumberable diaries.
dozen Mt. Vernon spelling tab.
let's
S6 Giftee sets Whatever they
may bel.
l silent secretary afterwards re.
turned, probably it talked back.
] collar case.
dozen ribbon guards.
sentiments; another Sentorial
puzzle).
first aid cases; (for victims of
the investigations, no doubt.
Cigarette cases. page Lucy Gas.
toni
incense burners-Ato burn be.
fore the party leaders, perhaps.