davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-13
pID NOT STUCK TO FACTS

Noah was misrepresented by the Babylo- nians. The discovery that they assigned to him an age of 64,800 years shows how early was the custom of writing history in accordance with the desires of contemporaries rather than the facts of the case. But those Babylonians might at least have held their imaginations in check out of sympathy with Noah. 1t would be a fearsome thing to condemn a living man to an existence of 640O0 years, and they had no right to subject even a dead man to, that hypothetical Baltimore Sun.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-13

One alienist in the Chicago trial has admitted that his conclusions might have been different if he had been in posses sion of some of the information which the defendants withheld from him. In
 this battle of wits the youths seem more agile than the experts.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-13

In bank, when a shortage is discov- cred in some employees accounts, the of- fender is promptly either fired or jailed. In our city government, the offender is immediately given a clean bill of health by the official next over him.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-13

Garden truck is suffering intensely from toverheating. Sweet corn doesn't have to be cooked in the kitchen this year. It is picked
 hot. All the consignee has to do is to butter
 and serve. The hospitals of America are full
 of corn7belt farmers suffering from burns
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-13

Grass IS so dry cows are subsisting on a hot diet. They come home at night steaming hot and in such condition they have to be milked by volunteer firemen Most of the milk is total loss. It is too hot to handle An enormous business is being done throughout the country this summer by fire insurance companies giving coverage to cows.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-13

If one may make up definition from Ia casual reading of the expert alienist testimony, an insane person is very bright fellow who has some queer mo- tions. There are plenty of people with queer notions, but they apparently are
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-13
Not What He Wanted

"You will observe" sa id the suave auto mobile salesman, that with the motor run ming at a high acceleratio1 point, one has to place one's ear near the hood in order to hear it'
 "'Twon't dol" exclaimed Mrs. Newrich. Whats the use of having classy car like this if it don't make enough noise to attract folks attention ?"-Robert Michell.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-13

Stranger at what price do you value the COW with the white face saw yes terday in the field by the railroad?
 Farmer-Are you the tax assessor or has she been killed by the cars?-Country Gen, tleman.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-13

Grass hoppers are hopping from hot blade to hot blade like guests trying to find the nearest exit in hotel fires. They are, going crazy with the heat and causing havoc in the insect world by claiming they're fire-flies.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-13
Potatoes are being dug baked.

Eggplant is being grown hard-boiled, and field. Tomatoes are exploding on the plant. All the tomato grower can do is to save the seeds and use them for the heads of Swedish matches.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-13
sTGNOR NTUssOLINrs MODEsTY

Signor Mussolini has assured an audience recently that he is no more than human. There was no truth, he said In reports to the contrary.-St. Paul Dispatch.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-13
OR SOMETHING NEAR IT ! !

A Kentucky murderer, paroled from state institution for the criminally insane, went home and straightway killed a neighbor. It is very likely this will be considered a violation of the terms of his parole.-Cleveland Plain Dealer
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-13

Red ants are sin terrible shape. Three of them crawled onto the arm of child last week. The child died of burns.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-13

Lettuce is. being burned to crisp. A lettuce salad this season looks like a tray of burned correspondence. For the first time in history celery is being served hot And passed by the board of fire underwriters
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-13
OutcIassad

|, Duncan ''Why did Jenks give up the study of law-become discouraged?"
 Jimpson: "Yes. He lost out so often when he argued with his wife that he figured he'd make a darn poor lawyer."-Edna Baehr
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-13

the choics were left to ms. whether to nave free press or free government, \ would choose a free press.--Th0mas Jefferson.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-13

a This is the dryest summer in years. Rain
 drops are few and far between. Old Sol is
 making nonstop. run and vegetation of all kinds is becoming | subject for mention only in the annual reports of losses by fire
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-13
Unpublished Letters of Famous nie

Unpublished Letters Of Famous Men Dr. Robert Roberts,
 Bern, Switzerland.
 Dear Doctor :--I thought I would write you about my eyes. They are in verys bad shape and, in fact, am almost blind You may not believe it, sir, but when shot an apple from my sons head recently, at a hun. dred yards, I missed the core a sixteenth oi an inch. The other day shot at dime at fifty paces and nearly missed it, hitting the coin near the edge. Please send me some. thing for my eyes before it is too late and ] am totally blind. Thanking you in advance I am, Very truly, r WILLIAM TELL.
 Dear Hans Brumble :-Of course you hay, heard about my long sleep in the mountains but doubt if you'll know me when you see me. When l came home again after twenty years, Hans, the only people who recognized me were those owed money to when left
 That brings me to the subject of this let ter, old fellow. Do you remember that flint lock gun sold you, before I left2 We'll Hans, you didn't pay me. I was asleep thu whole time, so I don't think it would bt hardly fair to outlaw the debt. So please senG me the money at once. It was $6, and two plugs of chewing tobacco.
 Hoping to receive an early reply, I am as ever, RIP VAN TWINKLE.
 P. S.-I'H make it $4 and the chewing tobacco,
 .t
 Dear King Arthur Am enjoying my va cation very much. Please send me a coupll of suits of armor, and three pairs of tempered steel underwear by return freight.s8 l met a swell girl here the other day. She'l just the sort of girl to keep house for m, and weld my socks. Her father, unfortunately doesn't like me. He almost fractured hii leg last night when he attempted to kicl me downstairs. Armor comes in handy d other times than on the battle field, eh. Art One disadvantage, though, she hates to si on my lap!
 Well, my regards to all the boys at thu round table. As ever,
 SIR LANCELOT.
 A young lady of our acquaintance says sh, doesn't know what "stag" is, but she in sists that a smoker is two-legged anima
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-13
A Maid of Her Word.

Mrs Heller (to new maid) "Nofa, did you clean the gold fish as I told you to do?'
 Nora: "That did, Mum, and seraped all tn scales off av thim. Sure tis illigant to be able to have fresh fish loik that winiver~ yez wants thin. m."-JOhn F. Robinson.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-13

Squash is considered fire menace. Watert melons are being crated and shipped as hot watermelons subject to seizure by the fire department, and at the best hotels cantaloupe is being served only to guests carrying their own fire extinguisher equipment ,a.a,.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-13
RightI

A little four-year-old boy had a pet calf, A bull came along the road and the calf started to follow it. t
 The little boy called his calf repeatedly. but it kept going.
 Finally he was heard to remark: sYonIl be sorry when supper time comespG. H. Fisher.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-13
n. O. ASHBTTRN
A. " 61oAADOhANy Brigadier General United States Army Chair man and Executive. Washington, D. C., August 8, 1924.

Mir. F. M. Jackson Writes From Glasgow To the Editor of The Age-Herald:
 This is great country to visit. But for living, give me the good old U. S. A. Am seeing so many things I've read of in song and story and am having very interesting trip. To see coal mines all so near large city, many in the town, reminds me of our wonderful mineral district. Glasgow is a great city and many visitors head this way. I see comparatively little building. Really the territory I've travelled do not believe I have seen as much building going up as is around Birmingham. I passed through Bir- Ia progressive and hustling center. The weather is cold. This is one summer I'm wearing a vest, and need it. Really it's been quite cold, is yet. I've had oportunity to talk with some persons acquainted with the Philippine Island situation. The clipping, an editorial in this mornings Glasgow Herald, is in keep ing with the general attitude of the people and so fully expresses my views (Ive always held the belief that we should hold the islands for the general good of the world) that I'm sending it to you.
 I trust all The Age-Herald friends are well and prospering. I see from the market news that New York cotton is still strong and that everybody is satisfied that whoever is elected, Davis or Coolidge, the country is saved. I'm travelling with my friend and business partner, Mir. B. B. Linthicum, his wife and daughter. We are all we'll.
 r. M. JACKSON.
 Glasgow, Scotland, July 2S, 1924.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-13

Safe-crackers frequently answer the question: When is safe not safe?
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-13

For attracting attention, the flash of a bankroll has searchlight beat thousand different. ways.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-13

ESxGLUSrvE ALABAMA MEMBER OF NORTH AMERiCAN SEWSRAPER AI.LEANCM
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-13
PRICE.FIXING

(Cdpyrieht. 1924. Reproduction forbiddsp)
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-13

Teiephone (prfvate branch exchange connect Ing all departments). Main +80O.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-13

Too Many Crimess-Bl Birmingham is a big growing city, but she furnishes too many crimes for her population. It seems more a lack of sufficient officers than of law enforce. ment -Centreville Press.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-13

MBMBEk OF ASSOCIATED PREss-Ths As soca4eed Press is exclusively euticIed to ths uss Ior publcation ef all news dispatches credited to at, or net otherwise credited in this paper and esso local news pubIished therein. All riehez oL repootcation oe special diBpatches arS atso reserved.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-13

A young lady of our acquaintance says she doesn't know what "stag' is, but she in sists that smoker is two-legged animal with a burning cigar in his mouth.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-13

An Eternal Investment. "-M Montevallo of fers one of these eternal investments" Solic- itors for funds for that institution Will give opportunity to lay treasures where moth and rust. do not corrupt. Hear them gladly and patiently. And when they give opportunity to give the money, subscribe it gladly. Sub scribe to "A Million for Montevallo." You will never regret it.-Albany- Decatur Daily.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-13
THE AGE-HERA AID
EnpEaIcK T. THOMPSON. .. .PHDsrDHNr

Battered at Birmingaha ham. Ala, post office aa rcond~class matter. of Congress. MsFch s. 1sJs
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-13

Out West in the great open exits swhere men are men and women are distrirt1 attor- neys the farmers are harvesting wheat in Fire Chiefs Association and subject to their own risk. In the rye and alfalfa fields the farmers are using smoke masks!
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-13

SGBsCRIPTIoN RATES-By mail, payable in Advance, in United States and Canada; Daily and Sunday one year, $500; six months. SAoOi three months, $2ss; month. s5c. Daily only: One year $6.50; six months. S3.26; thrss months, $1.75: month. 75o. Sunday only: one year. s3.50; six months, $I. 50; three months ate. one monthh. 25c.
 By carrier, where carrier delivery is mafu- tsaned5 zoe per week. $50 per month
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-13

NEWS BUREAUS-Washington, 500 DavidEen Building; State Capital, Montgomery Journal !5uiidings Tennessee Valley, Decatur -Albany; Luscaioose, News Bnlding; Jasper, Mountain EAgIe Building; Anniston, Star Buf1dings G4ds7 gen JosI-nM Building; Muscle Shoals Ttt-Chfes Daily Building. - &
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-13
|shE.aBONCE
 4S ONER
TerribIs Effsets of le DIV spslI

H 1ssGs., QX.lE,:,,R| Terrible Effects of he Dry Speai F , |g This is the dryest summer in years. Rain. drops are few and far between, Old Sol is making nonstop run and vegetation of all kinds is becoming | subject for mention only in the annual reports of losses by fire a'
 Grass is so dry cows are subsisting on hot diet. They come home at night steamins hot and in such condition they have to be milked by volunteer firemen. Most of the milk is total loss. It is too hot to handle An enormous business is being done throughout the country this summer by fire insurance companies giving eoverage to cows.
 Grass hoppers are hopping from hot blade to hot blade like guests trying to. find the nearest exit in hotel fires. They are going crazy with the heat and causing havoc in the insect world by claiming they're fire-flies.
 Red ants are sin terrible shape. Three of them crawled onto the arm of child last week. The child died of burns:
 Garden truck is suffering intensely from overheating. Sweet corn doesn't have to be cooked in the kitchen this year. It is picked hot. All the consignee has to do is to butter and serve. The hospitals of America are full of corn7beit farmers suffering from burns.
 Potatoes are being dug baked. '-'s..',
 ,i-tt .s a4- at L
 Eggplant is being grown hard-boiled and field. Tomatoes are exploding on the plant. All the tomato grower can do is to save the seeds and use them for the heads of Swedish matches.
 Lettuce is being burned to a crisp. A lettuce salad this season looks like tray of burned correspondence. For the first time in history celery is being served hot And passed by the board of fire underwriters.
 Squash is considered fire menace. Water. melons are being crated and shipped as hot watermelons subject to seizure by the fire department, and at the best hotels cantaloupe is being served only to guests carrying their own fire extinguisher equipment. ,a.f,,.
 -zts
 Out West in the great open exits swhere men are men and women are district attor- neys the farmers are harvesting wheat in fire trucks under supervision of the State Fire Chiefs Association and subject to their own risk. In the rye and alfalfa fields the farmers are using smoke masks!
 Tobacco is burning on the bush. The grow CTS plan to recommend it as self-lighting
 Onions are rying in the fields and cucum- bers are in such condition they can be mar keted only as hot pickles or hot dogs
 Even horticulture is suffering. Florists are selling hot flowers.
 And what is being done to front lawns this season is sumpin' terrible. Suburbanites are wearing themselves into physical 4coflapses watering the yard trying to get their lawns to keep cool without Coolidge. With no results.
 After a man has watered his lawn two solid hours what happens? It comes to a boil.
 Hundreds of suburban dwellers have per ished so far in August by becoming caught in the coils of a hot garden hose.
 Weather for tomorrow: Very cremating, with light southerly blisters.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-13
Forum. Of The People
Acknowledgement of Telegram

To the Editor of The Age Herald
 The Secretary of War directs me to ac. knowledge receipt of your telegram in regard to the reorganization of the barge line, and to express for him his appreciation of your interests in the matter.
 The advisory board has unanimously con. cured in the recommendation of the Secre. tary of War that the reorganization, as orig inally approved by him, be made effective at once.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-13

'' Tobacco is burning on the bush. The grow
 CTS plan to recommend it as self-lighting.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-13

Onions are rying in the fields and cucum- bers are in such condition they can be mar keted only as hot pickles or hot dogs
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-08-13

Hundreds of suburban dwellers have per- ished so far in August by becoming caught in the coils of hot garden hose.
 Weather for tomorrow: Very cremating, with light southerly blisters.
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1924-06-14
SUMMER SCHOOL
TO OPEN MONDAY
Three Hundred Students tx
pected in Higher Classes.

Summer schools in Indianapolis
will open Monday, June Is. accord
ing to announcement today.
The sixth. seventh and eighth
grades Will open at Shortridge High
School in the old building, under di-
rection Of J. + Thornton and will
continue until July %. Mrs. Eliza
beth Witt is principal Instructions
will be given by regular department
teachers. Registration will start
Monday from S-to y a. m. Between
sixty and seventy pupils are ex
peCted
The summer high school will be
under direction Of William Otto, and
will last forty days. Three hundred
students are expected 70 attend
School will he in the new buildings
at Shortridge.
Subjects Of English mathematics.
history. civics and first and second
wear Latin will be given. Students
win be allowed two subjects only
and one credit in each subject Will
be allowed
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1924-06-14
H|BERN|ANS WILL
CELEBRATE AUG. 10
Picnic at Columbia Park to
Feature Irish Day,

Irish day will be celebrated with a
picnic at Columbia Park, Aug 16.
Edward J. Sexton was named chair
man and j. T. O'Connor, secretary,
Of the general committee at a meet
ing Of the county board of the
Ancient Order Of Hibernians at Nor
rison hall, Friday night.
The following were named division
chairmen of committees of five for
each division: w. J. Sullivan, N.
J. Mannix, B. F. Kelly, B. F. KAY
anaugh, F. ]. Flaherty, B. T.
OLeary and J. H. Deery.
Mrs. I. R. La Porte, county presi-
dent of the Ladies Auxiliary, named
the following committee: Mrs. J. J.
O'Brien, Mrs. A. Mahoney, Mrs. J..
Ettherington, Miss Anna Sullivan,
Mrs. J. Arthur and Mrs. A. Christy.
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1924-06-14
No More Pumping
Up Tires

new air-tight valve cap which pre-
vents all loss of air in tires has recently
been put on the market by B. X Hughes
After many years of experimenting Mr.
Hughes has satisfied several of the largest
tire manufacturers that his valve cap will
make any good tire absolutely air-tight.
With this cap you can pump up your tires
and never have to touch them again until
tire is punctured or worn out. One in
lation lasts the life of a tire. The old
theory that air escapes through the rubber
no longer holds. The Hughes Valve Cap
doubles tire mileage and saves gasoline and
work. Every car owner is potential
buyer. And every tire running the streets
today has need of this valve cap. Mr.
Hughes wants these valve caps introduced
throughout the country wonderful OPP
portunity for agents. Write a once for
our proposition. B. K. Hughes. 2512 W
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1924-06-14

TF citizens and city officials
would accept one-hah the
- suggestions made by these
school children, indianapolis would
always present a spick and span
appearance.
They represent the ten winners
of the recent essay contest of the
Indianapolis fire department and
the Chamber of Commerce urging
a cleanup. paint-up campaign,
Pupils of the seventh and eighth
grades of public and parochial
schools were eligible for the con-
test. Every school was repre-
scented. The contest opened April
q and closed May 16.
Smiles are common on these
faces because each child was pre-
sented with So by Virgil T. Ferga-
son, chief of fire prevention, and
w. II. Gerke, chairman Of the pub
licity committee.
A board of city Identification
was suggested by several Of the
winners to stimulate interest in
improving the city's appearance.
The city's duty was brought out
by other children by extending and
improving municipal service such
as street cleaning, ash and gar
bage collections. and adding parks.
More trees and shrubbery We're
urged.
School children should be in
structed and organized in a clean
up army this summer another
suggested. They should be taught
principles Of sanitation and clean
illness.
All essays showed a thorough
study of the subject. and much
interest was manifested. The es-
says were graded by Miss Eliza
beth Hench, head of the English
department Of Indianapolis Public
Schools
Winners are: Myldred Green,
1910 w. Vermont St, School Is;
Wanda Gresham. 413 Caven St,
School 81; Viola Brant, SAG s. Me
ridian St. St. Johns Academy;
Geneva Campbell, 1880 w. Ohio
St, School Is; Evelyn Meyers, Ills
y. Capitol Ave. School II; Hazel
Rosenberg, 1871 Parkway Ave,
School IS; Manell Hamlen, 2S48
Riulevard Pl.. School 40; Frances
Cameron. 1116 w. Thirty-Fourth
St. School Al; Evelyn Clearwater,
1927 Commerce Ave. School So;
Phetus Davidson, q Norman CT,
School So.
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1924-06-14
PURSE SNATCHERS
At WORK IN CITY
Police Hunt Two Men Who
Robbed Woman.

Police today were hunting two
purse snatchers.
Miss Bessie B. Wetherholt. Apart
ment The Cartoon, Pratt and
Pennsylvania SITS, said she was
walking near Michigan and Penn
sylvania SITS. when two men passed
her. one grabbing her silver mesh
bag. 1t contained cents, a small
coin purse. keys to her apartment
and a Japanese cigarette case. One
man ran through d lot and the other
down the street. Police found the
cigarette case at Michigan and Della
ware SITS. but lost the trail at Mas
sachusetts Ave.
Mrs. Winifred Maxwell, 23S w.
New York St, proprietress of a
rooming house, reported roomer
Frank Daglich had $500 taken from
Il trunk in his room.
Martin Cassidy Vendome Hotel
California and Washington SITS, told
the police on May 6 he left $40
lying on the bed in his room a Is
s. Senate Ave. and a few minutes
later it was gone. He had lot re
ported it to police previous 10 Fri
day night.
David Sablosky, 4240 Carrollton
Ave. told police another "meanest
thief" stole his sons tricycle. valued
at 81.
Mrs. L. C. Hannah. Louisville,
KY. attended the theater with Mr.
and Mrs. T. A. Bell 527 Central
St. and left an overnight case and
clothing valued at $146 in the Bell
auto. 1t was gone when they re
turned.
Edward Gibbons, 81 y. Wallace
St, reported $50 watch and S. in
cash taken from his locker at the Y.
NJ. {. A
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1924-06-14
7. ILL.,. &E. WINS
RESTRAINING PLEA
Power Company Prevented
From Crossing Tracks,

State Supreme Court today grant
ed the T. H, I. & Z. Traction Com
pany a temporary restraining order
against The Indiana Electric Corpora
ton, preventing 1t from running it,
Terre Haute-Indianapolis power
transmission line across the T. H.
I. & z. right-of-way.
Superior Judge Linn D. Hay has
appointed appraisers TO estimate
damage done by erecting the line fol-
lowing his decision Friday giving
the electric company authority to
cross the right-Of-way.
The T. H, I. & Z. declares dam
age through electro-static and mag
netic disturbances which it alleges
would pc the result of crossing the
right-of-way with the power line
could not be estimated eqUitably by
the appraisers. It also declared that
the lines would disturb the telephone
lines on the right-of-way over which
train dispatches are given.
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1924-06-14
FUGITIVE CAUGHT HERE
Woman Will Be Returned to New
y ark, Ohio, to Face Cahrges.

Mrs. Jeanette Shinn. "a. of New
ark, Ohio, is held at city prison
today as a fugitive. Ohio authorizes
are expected today to return her TO
that city to face charges of eInbcz-
Element.
Chief of Police Swank wired police
here that Mrs. Shinn, in company
with man, was in this cicy and
would probably attempt to leave for
California. Detectives sullivan
Schaffner, Stewart and Gaughan lie
gan a search that resulted in her
arrest at Union Station. The man
was not held.