Evening star., 1924-12-22
'Please Don't Open Until Christmas, .
One Slogan Which Has Odd Results


g. diamond ring, while with others
you send them something you aint
afraid to have them know the price
Of and all the time you wish 1t would
up and bite 'eml
1t was this fact Of Christmas pres
ents not always working out like
they was originally intended to, got
and George. that's my husband, TO
talking over where this year we was
going TO have a sensible Christmas
for onct, and not give each other
thing, but make ii merely Juniors
day, and of course slip Annie Gooch.
our more or less faithful colored lady
alleged help. the five spot she had
lately been leading up to in the oblig-
ing ways they do, just at this season.
Well anyways, the subject come up
when Junior dragged out one of the
presents we-had reed last annum
from. outside sources, and which 1
had stored IN the pantry on account
we none of US knew what else to do
with II.
Mrs. Goofnah, q lady down the
street, had generously sent II to us,
probably on account her husband al
lows her to charge things at the En-
porum during Dec.
Ii was some object. being, a pink
satin mushroom, trimmed with lace
and gold ribbon, and the bottom of 1t
was kind OF gilded doughnut of
plaster, or something. -.
After IL come l spent many
weary Y hour of brain fag trying TO
figure out what II was. It being too
large for a pin cushion, too small TO
sit on, and too weak for a footstool.
SO I had it stuck away careful In
tissue paper on account II couldn't OF
cost a cent less then ten full ones,
and now Junior hauled II out. and
says can play with 1t, what Is 1t Ma,
and ] says I dunno but sure, take 1t,
It might as we'll be of some use.
Well anyways, seeing this pink
satin nothing was one thing that got
l. and George to talking over not let
ting the business of giving Xmas
presents get to be burden on US,
and etc. and I says now don't you
give me a thing dear. later In the
year II you can afford to give me
fur neck piece. why that's another
matter, but nothing for Christmas,
see? And Geo. says. all right but
you must promise you won't give me
nothing, neither, not thing. And
says absolutely. dear.
WELL naturally / believe in doing
" your Christmas shopping early,
so got up real early on the morning
of the 18th, and bought all Juniors
toys, marked some Of 'em with love
from Mamma. some with love from
Papa, and attributed. a bunch to
Santa Claus. Then I got a five-dollar
gold piece from the abank for Annie
Gooch, and my Xmas shopping was
all done. .
We'll. someways or another my
mind didn't get the easy feeling out
of this like I had expected, and be-
fore long I seen why, on account
when Annie come to work next day
after doing her daily hour over to
that Joe Bush of the Hawthorne
Clubs house. why she brought me
big parcel from Mrs. Bush marked
please do not open until Xmas.
So of course I took il right up in
my room and opened 1t, and of all
things, if that woman hadn't sent a
pen wiper TO Geo. for his fountain
pen, hair pin holder for me and my
bobbed hair, and a shaving mug for
Junior.
Well, naturally I couldn't let a
thing like that pass, so l put down
a list to the effect:
Mabel Bush--one pair OF hat pins,
Joe Bush-one white silk, hand
embroidered golf ball
That Bush chIld-one razor strop.
1 put these down, see, on account
when I give anything, / like to give
useful presents, and l realized these
were, especially the last, for IL Child
ever needed q razor strop, properly
applied. 1t was theirs. r..
But at the same time that I made
up my face to go down town and
shop for them, / also made up my
mind firmly that this would be the
last things I would buy for anyone.
But before I got out Of the house
the postman come. and Of all things
there was q bundle from old Gen.
Bluster, and I knew 1t was a present.
on account 1t was marked please
don't open until Christmas.
Well, the very minute l seen what
was inside Of II. q lovely 1924 cal
endar, why OF course / felt like I
would have to get back at him. so
I set him down on the list for q pais
OF military brushes
OF course, Old Gen. Busters hair
is all on his chin, but stiH and all,
men do so love to be battered.
Well anyways. I then decided that
was positively the last thing would
give. ,..,.
No more now, Jennie Jules. says to
myself, this Is getting to be camp
Xmas after all why the It's
sue paper and red ribbons is running
into real money already.
SO when one 4 OF hour later
there come a pkge from that bottle
blond down the street, Miss Demean-
or, marked hold until Xmas, and one
from her hance DR.. Salary, saying
hold until Xmas, well naturally l
held them long enough to get them
- ~
door. and in the first one was Jap
anese paper cutter from her that
hadn't learned English and couldn't
cut a thing but Japanese paper, at
least II a person was to Judge from
trying it on an Am. book. And the
doc had sent Geo. one of these trick
cigar lighters that uses up so many
matches, and me q hand dipped coat
hanger with the type OF body that
you hang a blouse on 1t several times
In vain before you finally succeed IN
hanging Il up, and then you close the
closet door gently and go away
get back the blouse Is always sleep
ing quietly on the floor.
THIS was pretty near too much TO
bear from comparative strangers,
but set 'en down for q coupla cop
les of Tho Rubyat, hoping II would In
each case complete ten vol. set of
same, and thought we'll. thank good
ness, that's the last. there amt q
soul else that I will, have to pick a
present for, and hardly, was the words
spoke then there arrived our annual
present from Uncle VIII.
OF course he lives way out West
and we don't see much Of him. but
= gS tAN A.A - ~
unole will. II you get me. And here
I had pretty near forgot all about
him until he sent US this lovely syn
thetie bronze statue OF Diana
Year after year ! and Geo. hope