Evening star., 1924-02-24

Hol loI HlySeil alone tnat took
on the large ambitions of which ]
have spoken to you, the large risks
engaged with them. Nay, do not re-
proach me: leave ME my won1sn'$s
right 10 make all the reproaches. 1
only wanted to do something for you
II have not written so freely to any
min In all my life. 1 could not do so
now did 1 not feel in some strange
way that by this time-perhaps az
this very timc-you are either dead Or
I'm some extreme Of peril If I knew
that you would see this, / could not
write it.
-As 1t is. it gives me some relief
it is my confessional. How often does
inner and real heart? Never, / think,
| to any man--certainly not to any liz
! ing, present man.
81 married; yes. 1t seemed the Or
usslui, necessary, desira BE Ii thing ns 10
do: ! should not complaint did that
with my eyes we'll opened and with
full counsel VI my father. Ny eyes
well opened but my heart we'll
ftnsed fb lSook ~ on my duties 3;;, a. one OF
wiTe, as head Of a. a househol,I u as as lady
J of certain rank. ] did all that, for IL
| tho system Of society. Ny husband IS
! content.
What am writing now? Arsu
| ing, justifying. defending,:. All, wera
! il possible that you would read this
and come back to me. never. never.
! though ii killed me, would I open my
| heart to you. | write Only to dead
! man. ! say-to one who can never
hea:-- I write once more TO a man
! who set other things above all that
il could have done. Deeds. deeds
what you call your country. your own
] iimPulses-these were the things you
placed above me. You placed above
! me this adventuring into the wilder
3 what
! impulses in your mans life. 1 know
what YOU valued above me.
[ Bot you are dead. While yoU
! lived l hoped your conscience wa
i clean. hope that never once have
| you descended to any conduct no.
| belonging t. Meriwether Lewis o.
VIRGINIA. L know that. no matter
| what temptation was yours. you
| Aston and that you were MertwetheI
| Lewis of Virginia.
/ Nay, ] cannot stop. How can you
mind my garrulous PENNY vain
shameful peri-Since you cannot see
what 1t says?
"Ah. I had so hoped once more &c
| sec you before 1t was too late. Should
| reach others, why, let It go TO all the
! world that Theodosia Burr that was.
Mrs. Aston of Carolina that is. once
| ardentiy imporruned man to jof2.
heF IN certain plans LOT ILS DSiLSl-
ment OF his fortunes as well as her
| own, and that you did not care u
| share in those plans! So I failed.
And. further-let that also go out u
the world glory in the truth that
'Yas. that at last is the truth al
the bottom OF my heart: hav..
! Searched it to the bottom and l have
! that you have not come back 10 me-.
| There-have / not said all that -
! woman could say TO a man. living or
| dead"
you to return. just as strongly have
hoped that you would not return
| In my soul ] wanted To see you go
, on in your own fashion. following
mine. That was the Meriwether
Lewis | had pictured to myself.
shall glory in my own undcins Il II
has meant your success.
keeping your own loyalty. holdinr
your own counsel and your OWE
speech 10 the end-pushing or
! through everything to what you have
have loved. Deeds. deeds, high ar-
| complishm meuts-these, in truth, ar
! the things which are TO prevail. Thr
selfish love OF success as success
these are the things women covCt
from man. Yes. but they are not
, the things n woman loves in a man.
| No; il is the Stiff-necked man, bound
in his own ambition, whom womei!
Hove. even as they swear they do not.
! Therefore. do not come back to
me, Meriwether Lewis. DO not
| coTfle-forget all that l have said to
you before--do not return until YOU
have done your work. Do not come
hack to me until you can come con
tent. DO not come to ME with your
+. splendid will broken. Let il triumph
even over the will of Burr. not
( used to yielding. not easily givink
!up anything desired.
This is almost the last letter /
shall ever write TO any man in all
my life. wonder who will read it
You. or all the world, perhaps! I
| wish il might rest with you at the
last. oh. let this thought lie with
back to me, and 7 rejoiced that you
did not.
"rell me. why is it that ! think OF
you lying where the wind is sweet
! in the trees" Why is it that think
| Of myself. too, lying at last, with all
my. doubts composed, all my restless
ambitions ended. all my foolish
dreams answered.in some place
where the sound of the unceasing
waters shall wash out from the
memory Of the world an my secrets
self crying: Il hope ] shall not be
.unhappy. for ] do not feel that have
been bad
"tdieu, N1erfwether Lewis. adieu!
| 7 am glad You can never read this. I
am glad that you have not come back
I am Glad that ] have failed.'