The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1924-04-25
BY GEE SEE

On sunny days
We think it pays
To stop the fire, and then
We fret and swear
And SINCE our hair
To build it up again!
The poets claim
That Springs dame
With blossoms in her hair;
And, all but nude,
In playful mood
She flutters thru the airl
But if her head
With blooms are spread,
III bet they're Devils Breath;
And if she's nude
Tho it is rude
| hope she'll freeze to death!
*%***s
If all the seed planted in the
Spring that were killed by freakish
weather like we've been having in
this section, were to be laid end to
end Well, they'd reach from end
to endl
Now is the time when green gard
eners plant seed and go out every
evening and scratch them up to
see if they're growing.
.s*s+s
That uneasy, restless feeling you
have is not spring fever. Not on
your lifel It's the instructive lazi-
ness common to us all which sneaks
to life in our veins when the sap
begins to rise.
To the student of poetry. (if there
are any of those rare animals among
my readers,) there is good hearty
laugh in the EXAMINATIONS of one
Robb Gill Wilson in last Sundays
advertiser. This rambling,
windy discourse occupied two full
columns, 1t was supposedly inspir-
ational, but its erudity makes it only
laughable.
But even the average reader, mot
a student of poetry9 would be jar
red with the clumsy efforts at
rhyme such as the following:
Shadows with meadows.
Effort with prophet.
Heaven with riven.
Dawning with mourning.
Portal with mortal.
Prove with love.
s%s*ss
If love doesn't prove any more
than that, it will go begging for
subjects.
TOUGH TRUCK DRIVER
PROVES TO BE GIRL" says
news heading in reporting col
hsion in which the driver of the
truck was taken to the hospital and
found to be a girl.
sA&sss
The report went ON to say that
she smoked, "cussed," ehewed to-
bacco and spit like man.
s**sss
What did tell you! Every day
in every way the female of the
species is growing more deadly
than the male!
The French Liner Paris" made
port in New York last Friday, and
reported a royal good time was had
by all" before the ship reached
the 'iquor limit" off our shores.
*s%-s4
Instead of dumping overheard the
liquors which had not been consum-
ed in the trip, and which were
in excess of the medical allowance"
permitted on foreign ships, they
used it TO treat the passengers
free of charge.
A very sensible idea! II | ever
get enough money | am going to
take trip on that ship.
Which is a reminder Anti-Sa-
loon Logger Anderson who is doing
time at Sing Sing for his betray-
al of the trust of honest prohibition
lists, is reported TO have hkened him
self to Christ in that he was being
prosecuted"
The Bible records the fact that
Christ turned water into wine. But
about all Anderson ever did was
to turn watered stock into ''ninel"
s&s&s&
We have just read humorous
story about small town print shop
and newspaper. 1t ran true to
form--even to the newspaper losing
the movie theatre al. because the
paper was attracting more atten-
tion than the movies.
s&&sss
But the story slipped cog when
it recorded that the town bank put
the publisher on his feet. "T,n take
care OF YOU the banker is made
TO say.
s&Asss
There amt no such animal" as
small town banker progressive
enough TO appreciate the value Of
the local newspaper.
e&asSs
Our idea % curah-bell IS the
iadse at debate who votes a blank
ballot IN the belief that il indicates
the affirmative.