The Washington times., 1924-12-01
With The
|Alibi Artists
A Cross Section of the
Daily Grind in Judge
McMahOn's Court.
Read EN- and Weep.
BY DONALD McDOUGAL.
MoIxAe I.av,, Gofa EoE CV1oofloV,a

Makes LAW Sale OF SpteucES.
HE went over three intersec
lions at twenty-five miles an hour,
your honor. ! paced him from
Seventh to Fourth on Virginia
avenue southeast yesterday after
noon about half past one. There
wasn't any intersecting traffic
except at Sixth street. He had
to do a little fancy driving 10
avoid a Ford touring car crossing
there, that seemed 70 have con-
siderable faith in the right-of-way
rule"
Counsel: The defendant hand
led his car with the requisite
skill, didn't he, officer"
Yes, sir. He seemed to know
everything abouf driving a car
except regulating !, the speed. /
, asked him why he didn't slow
up, instead Of doing all that
trick driving when, he saw the
Ford coming down Sixth street,
and he said he never thought of
that"
Pleaded Guilty.
Counsel: I'VE have pleaded
guilty, your honor. Only my
Client doesn't think he was going
as fast as the officer says"
The cop (asidel They never
do"
The court: Motorists who
think much about anything"
The cop: "He forfeited col
lateral last July for going %
miles an hour, and again in
August for running at 80, your
honor"
Counsel: 1--WE submit that for
feiting of collateral cannot be
admitted as evidence, il the court
please"
Boob: Il was going up there
looking for work"
You keep on looking for work
at that rate, young man, and
you'll find it. But on the other
side Of the river. $25 or ten days.
The Rev. MIR. Alibi Man.
We feel as though we weres 60
ing to preach. These spells come
over us every once in a while
especially when we have stomach
trouble. Maybe we ate too much
turkey, but. that hardly seems
probable, because 1t was only a
small one-eight pounds-and
Mrs. Alibi Man had some of it.
We can't seem to find any pills
or medicine that will relieve us
of these preaching spells, and
now we're convinced the malady
incurable. It's probably inherited,
xTyA
lieve there's Presbyterian minister
blood in our veins.
But we only get EN- occas.
ionally, and perhaps the best
way is to preach 'em off. All
Of which has reference to the
gentleman in the case above,
who was, actually guilty of
third offense of speeding, for
which the law prescribes a mini
mum punishment Of thirty DAYS
in jail and a $50 fine-but because
of the collateral system now in
vogue he escaped with a $25
penalty.
Law Is ScOrned.
Thus the law is scorned. rili.
culed, made a mock and monkey
of, while five daily newspapers
and heaven only knows how many
citizens associations and District
officials and learned societies and
authorities of all kinds are ask.
Ing what's wrong with Washing
tons traffic conditions. Well
that is, for one thing.
And it can be remedied with
out waiting FOR Congress to act
(thank Godl-without waiting for
the Commissioners to pass law
without even the thirty days of
diserace-nothipg is required bur
an order from the Commissioner
in charge of police, to the effect
that all speeders must stanl trial.
That order can be signed AT 10
o'clock in the morning and go into
effect at o'clock the same after
noon, when the new, shift of
police goes on duty.
The alibi that police officers are
free to get warrants for speedeps
won't stand inspection. There's
too much pressure brought to
bear in such cases for any one
man to stand up against. No one
is going to jail for thirty days
until he has exhausted every
shred OF his resC urces-social. DO
htical, financial. or what not.
And discretion in such a grave
uaattor ahoaild not h. Iaf& 40 e.