The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-06-18
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The Radio Bug

1L7ASCHV [CA1[N7ELS @GzA<<GkH \ The Radio Bug .sa 5s A radio bug is Sophronia Hugg, When the air jazz commences then up comes
 the rug;
 She'll dance all the time there's wave in
 the ether
 And shake to it's bottom the building be-
 heath her. She has cracked all the plaster, worn out the
 floors,
 She has loosened the rafters and wrecked all the doors.
 The sheiks all avoid her, a-tremble with fear, She has killed off dance partners from far
 and from near.
 The girls not exactly delicate wren; She raises the beam at two hundred and ten She says that she dances to make herself
 thinner,
 But keeps getting fatter and fatter, the sim
 ner
 Her neighbors all wait, as a most welcome
 thriller, To see the whole building cave in and so
 kill Ger! 70. A. N.
 The Old Question
 Mir. Newlywed If you were doing it over, which would you raise-boys or girlsY
 MT. Oldwed: Boys. My daughters swipe my cigarettes"
 From Our Children's Garden of Curses
 Recently a widower with a young daugh- ter, Mary, married a widow with a little girlr Rachel, age .thFee.1S1cG uIs aInsT aGr After they were married, the man took little Rachel on his knee, and tried to ex- plain matters to her; how they would all live together; how his little girl Mary would call Rachels mother mamma" and she, .IaI L. D mamma was now his wife and, accordingly, Mary and Rachel were sisters. - a
 Little Rachel listened attentivelx, and when he got through explaining, sat very quiet for several minutes, Then she asked, seriously: How did you folks get things mixed up so?"-Meta L. Zimmerman Hunting SaIamanders With Dr. Traprock T see that the volcano of Popocatapetl is having its annual eruption," said my good friend, Dr. Traprock, F.R.S.SE.U. That is a sign of the eternal youth of Mother Earth l; she is apt to burst out with something of the sort at this time of year.
 Tt reminds me of the time went down into the crater of Sassifotu hunting for sal amanders, which live, as you know, in the lava-beds of volcanoes q. ''The trip down into the crater was a thriller. It was like going to Hades without dying. Probably Dante and I are the only men who have ever done it. l had two specially trained fire-dogs with me and spe- cial equipment designed by myself; an as- bestos suit. gas-mask, umbrella or fire-screen, and fireproofed boots for wading in the molten lava.
 At the end of the second day captured my first salamander beautiful, bright red specimen about ten inches long, I took his temperature. which registered 362 Fahren- heit But had reckoned without Nature.
 It may have been that my presence and that of the fire-dogs was like a tickling of the throat to the mountain, but at any rate, she suddenly erupted with such violence that l, accompanied by forty tons of assorted debris, was hurled miles in the air. Only the quick use of my fire-screen- umbrella as a parachute saved me.
 T landed in the center of Lake Tiki Nunu My own temperature was so high that I instantly inflated like a potato dropped in hot grease, and a gentle wind from the southwest waited me ashore. And a curious thing happened to the salamanders; being ac- customed to the terrific heat of the crater, when they came in contact with the colder air at the zenith of our flight they disap- peared in the form of gas. But, believe me, I never came so near possessing a real sal amander."
 Sure Was!
 Near sighted lady, examining gloves: : Buck"
 Impertinent clerk "Buck nothing. Those or ra fbraa huoks and fhav'ra worth if too 1'--