davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1924-05-02

YOUNG LADIES-lTwo neat appearing
young ladies between Is al :2 APP
ply in person. Mr.. Roberts. Florence
Hotel
EXPERT OPERATORS ii beauty parIor
wanted; prefer MariEelio operators or
one familiar with Marinelio system. Good
wager. state age, experience. Qualifica-
tioms in first letter. Answer Beauty Par
Tor. care Age Herald.
WOMEN WANTED to paint lamp shades
for us at home: easy pleasant work;
whole part time. ADDRESS fNifeart Com
pany. 3602, FIT. Wayne, Ind
HELP WANTED--MAI4E Oh FEMALE 81
Evening star., 1924-01-13

ways do IL to get a title like for inst.
Basil HargrAve's Vermifuge" or
"Hoof and Mouth and then set down
at the desk and lay out or 4 sheets
Of CODY paper and look at them with
one eye cooked to try and find out
which is the most likely and then I
start the story with q view to making
It harmonize with the name. For ex-
ample II tho name or title was. Fun at
the Incinerating Plant" I would keep
as far away as possible from the at
mosphere Of the Fifth avenue demi-
monde.
I have always found it a good scheme
to open up q story with a couple lines
Of dialogue, like:
where did you put your gum?"
asked Edith Quayer.
II forget" replied Dorothy Abbott.
The two girls were spending the
summer at famous watering trough.
They had just been in bathing and at
present were engaged IN sorting the
dental floss that come in by the after
noon post.
'T am getting sick in tired Of this
place." went on Miss Quaver.
"It Is mutual" replied her friend,
shying q cuspidor at passersby.
At the beginning a skilled writer
could go most anywheres but 1t would
be my tendency to drop those two
characters and take up the life of q
mule in the Grand Canyon. The mule
watches tho trains come in from the
Evening star., 1924-01-13

TT are ginerally Supposed" did
Arthur. that something should be
done, or else something else
You are talking garbage" rore
this Wanda. Russia got her revoiu-
anything about it.
yet see how unhappy she got"
snuggest Arthur.
DO that make some difference?
require Wanda. you do not need to
be happy when you are Free. Ban
zai. Ladies & gentmen, 1 wish al
members of this Thinking Society 10
please stand up and give cheers as
follows:
"21a for Pres. Obregon.
"2ia for the Other Side.
Everybody ready for that? Very
nice. So please arise ALL
But unfortunately all members of
that Japanese Thinking Society arose
up too quick for S. Wanda and what
next happened he were making bumps
on stairway by setting down rapidly
each time he hit.
What are this out rage?" he re-
quire when he made last strike on
street.
Revolution narrate Sydney Katsu
Jr. with Santa Cruz expression.
"How darest you start a Revolu
ton without giving me notice."
skweek Wanda. rubbing a broken
bone In his collar.
Hon. Trotsky will ask similar
question on the evening when he
bumps his head on Moscow collapse
Arthur Kick ahajama with hammer
$50 now, ladies &. gentmen, we will
resum our Question: What Are the
World Coming to this Week"
Therefore we all set back on chairs
while looking completely dazzed.
Hoping you are the same
Yours truly
HASHIMURA TOGO.
Copyright. 1324.)
Evening star., 1924-01-13
HOW 70 PRODUCE SHORT STORIES
Ring Lardner Completes With Regular Teachers

come when man and lady that was
the train going back east.
WELL" says the lady, what did you
think of the Canyon?"
Some cavet" says the man.
What funny way to put it!' would
be the lady's laughing remark.
From that their friendship would
rfpen and rot into love and unless one
or both of them is married, you could
wind UP the story In Chicago.
So much for the writing. Now in re-
CARDS TO peddling the completed work
4 good many young writer's makes the
mistake of enclosing a stamped, self
addressed envelope, big enough for the
manuscript to come back in. This is too
much Of a temptation to the editor and
he can't hardly help from yielding 10
1t. That Is why so many manuscripts
is returned.
scheme to not even sign my name to
the story and when 1 have got It
sealed up In the envelope and ad-
dressed, I take It to some nearby
town where 1 don't live and mail IL
from there. The editor don't know
who wrote the story so how can he
send It backf He is in a quandary.
Stories should be written on paper
that nothing else has ever been
written on and don't use more than
both sides Of the sheet and never
send a short story to an editor on
a postcard.
These is just few hints for young
writer's and i wished I had time to
tell you more. but a man has got 10
pay some attention to his music.
RING w. LARDNER
Evening star., 1924-01-13
MEXICO ARE NOW IN STATE OF REVOLUTION

Yet they labor and they toll well
Setting fire to NANNY a Oil Wolf,
There the patriots. man & maiden,
Walk around and are well laden
Like the push-carts in the ghettos,
Full OF shoot-guns and stilettos;
And when Presidents feel slighted
They are quickly dinnamited.
Att aboy! You bat we need EN-
In the Land Of Perfect Freedom
"Yay, mein Kamrades;" negotiate
S. Wanda with weeps, when America
go around wasting her time, thinking
about Henery Ford. Incum Tax and
other publick expenses, Hon. Mexico
always can be counted on for at
Ieastly one ID Revolution. There the
Him of Hate are played on every fun
nograft record. Fires of dishcontent
smudge & smell from every patch of
native cacktus, warning hearts In
Minnyapples & st. Paul. Are
that not an inspiring thought?"
What are the use of that Revolu-
tion when you got it?'' require Sgd
ney Katsu Jr. from his new collar.
What are the use Of Revolution ?"
repeat S. Wanda, scratching places
where his hair wasn't cut. That are
a dishagreeable question. Are you at
tempting to insult me?"
'Umpossibly," narrate Sydney. But
according to my education, there are
use for everything in this world.
Even mosquitoes are useful to keep
summer boarders from playing NAH
Jong too late. But what can you do
with a Revolution when you got
one?"
Same can be said of prize-fights,"
explode S. Wanda yet do that stop
persons from sending to Argentina
for to get q swollen puncher what can
be knocked down 9 times without
painT'
Revolutions do not get the world
anywheres," howell Cousin Nogi.
"I reply ditto about all fights (prize,
Evening star., 1924-01-13
WHERE REVOLUTIONS GROW WILD
Japanese Schoolboy Hears Talk on Mexico.
BY WALLACE IRWIN,
To Editor The Star:

! To Editor The Star:
~ EAREST SIR: The Japanese
Thinking Society, OF which
| / are a membership. held its
| ~ regular annual meeting last
night at McWeevil's Dance & Bootleg
Palace where we go because Police SO
seldom come there.
| Question before that meeting were
following:
What Are the World Coming to
This Week?
! Arthur Kickahajama, Japanese un-
dertaker. set in Hon. Chair and mako
knock with the presidential hammer,
but that do not accomplish very
much because S. Wanda, Japanese
socialist. come there with his seed
looking clothes and lots of objec-
| tions all over his loud mouth.
| II bject" he narrate, slamming to
his End hand feet.
How you could do that?" require
Arthur. when nothing has been said
as yett?'
II wish put my objection in early"
he explain. 80 that all will know
dishagree."
! Then say your Grafton now" man
ipulate tho Chair with 3 legs. "&
after YOU finished talking maybe we
can begin thinking
/ Then / say this" commence S.
/ Wanda with II lb. hair on his kneck.
! Mexico are now in state of RevoIu-
| tion and what are we doing?"
Nothing" holla /. Anazuma, Jap
anese barber from his feet.
Get hava navar snokan N vn,, sy,
yrs.," narrate 8. Wanda with snar-
rels.
"If you would come to my Shave &
Hair Raising Parlor more oftenly,"
negotiate Anazuma, maybe you could
get chance to learn some wisedom."
"Aint that like tho Money Classes"
yall s Wanda. Always drubbing up
business. Yet I repeat II. What are
we doing about Mexican Revolution -
From where we stand,">yan Cousin
Nogi standing on his legs. nothing
can be done to stop it,
stop it?" require S. Wanda with
tall eyebrows. II do not come here to
stop II. / wish this Society to think
up some good way to keep It con-
tinuing till 1 get there"
Maybe we could take up collection
& send you at oncely." report Arthur
Kickahajama with hammer.
II obJect!" whollup S. Wanda 81
shall go there on a Red ticket and
mono OF your business. But since 1
are standing here, wish take an
hour OF your valueless time telling
you something"
81 G. grone heard. everywheres
while S Wanda speak by requesh:
I'm all Western Hemispear, includ-
ing Venezuela and Oklahoma, Mexico
are the one hope for a Revolution
America, false America, merely set
back and let Geo do 1t. Here in this
uncivilized nationality working per-
sons are too lazy to stop work and take
up explosives. Brickiiars. plasterers
&: plumbing specialists puts their dis
honest zoos in pocket every Satdy
night and go to a emotion picture
show. How disgusted! It give me a
feeling Of deep Nassau Of the STUN
mick to sec SO many laborers labor
ing when Freedom sets forgotten on
the fire-escape
q + =
0pUT Mexico, fair Mexico! I will
quote you some poem:
TN that land Of red bandannas
Where they do not raise bannAnnaA.
Evening star., 1924-01-13

bull and chicken) Yet do that hen
der rich oil magnates from paying
96s plus tax to set on box seat by the
ring -edge where they can see every
thing? Answer Is No 10oO0oOoO! {"
We all get silent when hearing this
great chunk Of Intelligence.
Neigh, neigh" whooper S. Wanda
object Of Revolution are to revolute
and see what happens afterwards.
And for that reason, il any, Mexico
should be helped in every ways. For
why, ! ask It? Because SO. Do we
not encourage foreign products from
other lands? Yes indeedly. We go to
Key West for our Cuban cigars, to
Ireland for our Police, to Brazil for
our nuts. Then why should we not
send to Mexico for our Revolutions,
buying them in shiploads from land
where they grow cheap & wild in
every vacant lot?
20 Mexico! How I wish 1 had a
-uitar and sweet Stingorita to
dance while / sing thy praze"
"Goshes" holla Sydney Katsu Jr
IF he are going to sing again I shall
adjourn
'Tm-ta-ta. Cm-ta-ta.' commence
S. Wanda, clicking his thumbs
40 Mexico. dolchy far niente,
Land Of the stabbed Presidente-
For sc cigarro
I'd travel tomorrow
To get in some trouble a plenty.
I'D go in a neat little carlo
And start up revolutionario,
A double attraction
With plenty of action
That looks like Selznik scenario"
4 X X
"Odor in the courtroom holla Ar
thur Kickahajama with Chair. "Mr.
Orator, when you got Mexico what
would you do wit itT'
Are 1t necessary to do anything
with a country after II revolutes?"
require S. Wanda socially.
Evening star., 1924-01-13

noxious insects. For instance, in some
localities one may discover a speci-
men of our handsome king snake, a
species running to about sixty inches
in length, glossy as newly glazed
porcelain. and beautifully marked
with black, yellow and white. While
a little spiteful when first captured
it very soon becomes gentle and tame,
and 1t makes an interesting pet. And
when we know that 1t Is the greatest
enemy Of the rattlesnake. next to
man, we may admire 1t all the more.
1t will capture and swallow any of
our venomous reptiles-indeed, it ac-
tually hunts for them for food
Strange to say. the king snake is
entirely immune to snake venom, and
the bite OF a big rattler in no way
incommodes 1t. beyond the mere pune
lures of the fangs. The poison Of the
most venomous snakes in the world
has been injected into the circulation
of this snake with hypodermic
syringe, but, outside Of few pass
ing symptoms, has had no visible@ef-
fects whatever. In this particular il
probably stands alone. and it would
be difficult to account for the origin
Of the immunity.
All of our pretty little garter snakes
are harmless. AS a matter Of fact,
any one OF the genus Is easily tanned
and soon becomes very gentle and
interesting pet. 1t will take insects
from ones fingers and behave much
after the fashion Of a pet lizard
such as the American chameleon.
Another harmless snage occurring
in the District Of Columbia is the
puff adder or blowing viper-a most
interesting species. 1t has the habit
of puffing itself up, kissing and fiat
tening the fore part of its length out
SO as to look very dangerous. not to
say ferociouS. and this behavior has
cost many q one it's life. The young
of this snake are very pretty little
fellows, and 1t is amusing to see the
cunning way In which they initiate
their elders in the blowing feat.
Our harmless snakes should be un-
der the protection OF the law. as they
are generally quite as efficient in the
destruction Of noxious and harmful
insects as any insectivorous bird that
ever came into the District Of Column
biar-and their habits are equally
worthy of study.
Evening star., 1924-01-13
Tea Tasting.

THE grading of teas for market
= is accomplished by tasting. II
cannot be done In any other way. To do
it we'll Is extremely difficult Very
few men have the delicacy of taste
requisite for the purpose, and they
are able to command large salaries.
An expert tea-taster will often taste
as many as 1000 samples of tea in
day. He does not swallow the tea. To
drink much tea would render his
taste less acute and his judgmen,
proportionately less accurate. Never
theless, the professional tea-taste- ig
liable to suffer from headache. gid
diness and other disagreeable symp
-tomS.
Evening star., 1924-01-13

in the case of the diamond back ter
rapin, they are bred in great numbers
at special establishments for that sole
purpose.
Throughout all these years and ages
OF slaughter and determination per-
haps no group has suffered as severe
ly as the snakes. There are several
reasons for this, the chief being, per-
haps. that some species In the snake
fauna of most countries are venom
Gus, and that untold thousands of
deaths have, in time, resulted from
their bites. From the earliest writ
ings in history down to modern times
the snake has been made to represent
all that is evil In human nature. AS a
result. most people dread or even
hate the very sight Of a snake Of any
description. and it is, indeed. a rare
Incident to have such a one meet
with a living specimen In its habitat
that 1t is not at once dispatched and
generally mutilated.
Since the earliest time the snakes
of the District of Columbia have
formed no exception to this treat
ment. notwithstanding that much
popular literature is extant pointing
to the fact that at least nine species
out of ten in this area are entirely
harmless and not to say of value
economically.
There was a time, not so many years
ago. comparatively. when the banded
rattlesnake, the copperhead snake
and the water moccasin or cotton
mouth" snake were anything but
rare in the area. designated as the
District of Columbia, but at present
there is every reason to believe that
all three species have been entirely
exterminated, although a straggler
from Maryland may occasionally be
found up the river among the rocks
there found, though mono has been
reported lately.
In former years the copperhead
was also found at the head Of Rock
Creek Park, within the District line,
and stray one may yet be seen in
that locality. There are stories In
plenty, every summer and spring, Of
some one having "heroicalIy" slain
- o'o Va SUppCIAcdu
not far from Washington, but when
careful investigation Is made, and
the specimen. If recovered, is exam
ined by some one competent to make
a correct Identification, It invariably
turns out to be one OF the common
water snakes still to be found along
the water front or perhaps a puff
adder" IL discovered inland in the
less frequented parts Of the District
X X \
THIRTY or forty years ago, It was
no unusual thing to meet with
these venomous reptiles within the
precincts of the District, especially
the copperhead. but those days are
past This snake is still by no means
rare in northern Virginia, and in
some parts OF southern Maryland,
over which territory they are now
being moro or less rapidly exter-
mated.
Some of our snakes, constantly be-
destroyed as venomous, within the
District lines. are not only entirely
harmless, but very beautiful in ap-
pearance. and, in their way, further
mans interests. especially in the mat
ter Of consuming great quantities Of
Evening star., 1924-01-13

0 the editor: PeYusal OF tho ad-
yertis!ng columns Of some OF
our leading periodicals shows
- that whatever else this country
NAV be shy OF, they amt no lack OF
correspondence schools that learns you
the art OF short story writing. The most
famous OF these schools goes SO far as
to state that ono Of their pupils cleaned
up 35ooooo and no hundreds dollars
writing short stories after he or she
had took the course though It don't say
II that amt. was earned in VI. or 70.
However for some reason another you
don't hardly ever pick UP a high class
masazine and find moro than or
stories In Il that was written by boys
or gals that had win their phi beta
skeleton keys at this or that story writ
ing college. In fact the majority Of the
successful authors Of short fiction today
never went to no kind Of college or
u they did, they studied piano tuning
or the barber trade. They could Of got
lust as far In what call the literary
game II they had Of stayed homo those
1 yrs. and helped mother carry out the
empty bottles.
Tine aI8W0r ID IHAt IIlcy dlH hO
school in operation up to date, whether
Il be a gen. institution Of learning or a
school that specialixes In story writing.
which can make a great author out Of
a born druggist.
But little group OF our younger
drinkerss realizing this. has suggested
that maybe boys and gals who wants
to take up writing as their life work
would be very little benefited II some
person like was to give them a few
hints In regards to the technic Of the
short story. how to Ga about planning
II and writing It. when and where to
plant the love interest and climax. and
finally how to market tho finished
product In q way that won't leave no
bad taste In tho mouth.
Well. friends, It seems to me like the
best method to use In giving out these
hints Is to try and describe my own
personal procedure from the time I get
inspired till the time the manuscript
Is mailed.
Well. the first thing I generally al
Evening star., 1924-01-13
Steel Shaving. Take Fire.

A PILE of steel shavings recently
took fire at a large dynamo fac
tory, presenting the unusual spectacle
Of bonfire Of steel. The shavings
became heated from some rubbish
burning nearby, and water proved
useless in extinguishing the blazing
steel. 1t was finally necessary TO
rake the pile apart In order TO subdue
the flames.
In such a pile of steel oxidation
takes place faster than the resultine
heat can be carried away, and any
heating from an outside source may
actually lead to combustion.
Evening star., 1924-01-13
with marked rapidity. began to dis

with marked rapidity, began to dis
appear.
AS already stated, many were slain
furnish him with what he them con-
sidered. and still considers. sport All
OF the larger forms disappeared first
and these were followed by others
at varying periods and times. Many
were destroyed for the sole reason
that they were inimical to his inter-
ests; some because they were danger
Gus to his existence, and others for
reasons already mentioned.
AS time passed science gradually
claimed her share for the purposes of
study. description and illustration.
AS the years rolled by and history
passed on to present time this quota
proved to be by no means a mean
ono. and It is one that is practically
in full operation today. Some species
are still taken in numbers for food;
many are destroyed for no purpose
whatever; science claims her share
other natural causes that have ever
been In operation kill off many others.
and. finally. thoughtiess and ignorant
people still take wild bird and ami
NAL life for fun-destroying snakes.
lizards and many batrachians; pull
up wild flowers by their roots all
over the District and do many other
things too numerous to mention that
tend toward making a desert Of the
area in due course of time.
CEvENTY--FIVE years ago, when
~ Washington was practically but
a good. big village and many parts
OF the District of Columbia were
fairly wild territory, it was remark
able to note. even then. the abun-
dance of life as seen in the plant and
animal world. Hundreds Of species
Of wild towering plants iourished
everywhere, and Of these the pitcher
plants and others have entirely dis
appeared. When the vernal migra-
tion OF birds took place it was truly
Joy to sec the numbers and the
varieties that flooded northward at
that time. Many species OF these
como no more, while others are very,
very scarce.
Time was when orioles, tanagers.
warbler and many others nested in
the nnidcity districts, but at present
these are so very rare that few Of
us ever see them-or they pass with
out having been noticed at all. Wild
turkeys and grouse were by no means
uncommon and wild fowls focked in
hundreds on the Potomac. Where
beautiful gulls and tern few along
the shores in great numbers. none are
now to be seen at any time Of the
year-and SO on with all the other
avian genera.
Again. man has, In the area In
question, almost exterminated the
mammalian fauna. Shrews, mice.
muskrats, rabbits and an occasional
fox, yes; but all the rest is gone and
gone forever.
For various reasons, too obvious to
mention, fish have been fairly well
protected. preserved and restored
when notably decreasing; but turtles,
tortofses. frogs and their various
allies are now rapidly being wiped
out. When the demand is great
enough to preserve them for food, as
Evening star., 1924-01-13

nary dight and disappeared completely.
Search was instituted for the plane
whom It failed to return, but 1t had
vanished without leaving q single trace.
There was no storm, nor was there any
known cause for an accident. Time
passed and the matter was almost for
gotten. In 1890 few pieces OF Pc
cular-loolxin6 wreckase were found
near q small bayou at distance from
tho air station and It is thought this
may have been the tong-lost ship"
but It was impossible to identify the
ruins.
Later another seaplans disappeared
at that station IN almost the Same way.
One Of the larger planes capable Of
carrying q dozen men left for . navi-
CATION ''hop" and did not return, nor
was any sign Of It found upon search
Of the Gulf Of Mexico and the country
surrounding Pensacola. Perhaps a
forced landing in the gulf stove In the
bottom Of the hull, causing the ''shtp''
to sink with all on board.
Evening star., 1924-01-13

who is going to ride him, but never
finds out. He don't even know after the
ride Is over.
The love interest and climax would
Evening star., 1924-01-13
Prehistoric and Other Animal Life
t. Studied in District of Columbia


eeod-P'oof Foss7R
Are Of
Communities o the Harmless sVa1g;e HaveSuF
Evening star., 1924-01-13

no the editor: PeYusal Of tho ad-
vertis.ng columns Of some OF
our leading periodicals shows
that whatever else this country
Evening star., 1924-01-13

0pUT Mexico, fair Mexico, I will
quote you some poem:
In that land Of red bandannaS
Where they do not raise bannAnnaa.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-11-30

He drove an E. M. E. stock car owned by Dr.. J. T. Miller of Cordova. katz continued his winning streak in races held during 19O9-10-11-12 and 13 un- til an accident in 1913 which rendered his right arm helpless and favored his retirement.
 Races Featured
 Since 1913 many auto races have been held at the fair grounds and a number of local drivers have partici- pated-but the present trend is to- wards professional drivers of national repute, with few local men at the
 old timers remember the famous pathfindine tour to Atlanta which The Age-Herald conducted in 1909. This "ice-breaker" was followed by a movement to promote good roads tours throughout t.ie south by F.. K. Norman, assistant Birmingham postmaster, who then was connected with the Birming- nam Ledger Although these tours worked great hardship on the driver for the pathfinding cars they did more to stip up interest in better highways than anything that had happened previously.