The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-03-05
|Pegler Gives Miami Close
 Inspection
Scribe Can't See Why Nor Wherefore lof Things in
 Florida City
sy wEsTsEoSsR s a FEMsLEn M

MIAMI. Fla, 'March a.-Investiga- fions being somstkihg aof. fad just bow, your correspondents bought chips hnd sat@4He4te find. oue9 some things. hbout Miami. raost of which he is now ready to admit is none of his business Among the things that hs4was most turious about are, the home life and $ocial customs of the lobster. This cost $0 cents. Hitherto, we had an idea that he lobster was a sort of fish, but 1t how appears that the cases are re- Yersed. For the skipper of the glass bottom boat has pounched 50 cents and Eve know nothing about the private life pf the lobster, beyond the fact that he Turns red in the face when boiled, which trait hey yshares with many ac- huaintances of your correspondent. X By curious combination of circum-. tances, the bottom of the glass bottom boat fs made of glass, and through this glass they invite you--in fact, they even No so far as to defy you--to investigate he lobster in. the privacy of his home. Beverai varieties of ayowed fish swam beneath the lens of the glass bottom boat, and, obserYing the ipeering faces If the investigators, swarh up and flat ened their little noses fully against the ane In a manifest feeling of affinity
 
 Nerve anything so listless as the daily occasions of the deep. /
 A Mullet? aI
 That is q mulIet," said one of the nvestisators. rather insultingly, we Thought. I ,sM,
 "Mullet yourself" exclaimed the fish Fhose tail action speaks louder than Words, and with this retort, swam off
 There were pen-fishes, also, but we have no idea why they are called pen- fishes, uniessk perhaps, they scratch. Ind toad-fish, as ugly as any fish fou'll see on Broadway whose face is Is best defense against voracious bar acuda. which considers the unprepos- essing octapus as a luscious bit of eiicatessen but draws the line on toad ish. This seems most insulting to the 4oad-fish but he is not a sensitive reature and has stubbornly refused to hange the model of his face although 10 might if he ever saw himself in
 mirror. 4-A
 & The lobster. though, resides among fhe shrubbery of the sea bottom, which ' as the same complexion as his own nd shields his from the scrutiny of Investigators. @ 4 It may be said then, that the lobster as no statement to make at this time nd that, any one who quotes him on ny matter does so without authority. 5NVe tried to draw him out by reciting lode messages such as cherries and arsnips have been going around tell .fpg people that you and bananas had private agreement with Brussels tprouts. Is that true?" |
 # "Parsnips is a liar," was the reply. \ For publication?"
 "No; let the public find out for them Eelves, like I did" &s1 Likes Veal le. / < Al It seems that the lobster, which has
 strong predilection for veal, spends jhuch of his time among the calves at ihe beach and one who has roamed over ,his picturesque range is able to state Dat the lobster; in this respect, Is no \ lobster at all, but gentleman with, a The eye for beautiful things.
 ] There Is a liquor question in Miami 'iPo, but after purely professional in X &llestigation of the matter, your corre- t lpondcnt has decided that it is none ! sk his business. This Is the one town kh America where liquor is too cheap Ind the case of the Miamese bootleeg- X Iers should be solemn warning to N bose of. other communities that the 4 luotations must never go below par. ; E the. same liquor that is neglected at 2 resent prices were raised to $60 a case, \ hles would be much better. But when Y Ffe bOotleggers are willing to sell icptch whisky for $35 case in Miami, Il1la., after paying all transport and K lnuggling costs, they have either turn N li aitruistic or lost respect for the in- Diligence of their, clientele. One point ID out to a man who said he could "get 4hpu some" for $35 Q case, that the same Ihisky was now selling for $s6 q case
 HO0A Bfs Lots '
 l"You must handle a great deal < of Huff In order to be. able to sell 1t a bliar cheaper than the London price" 1" VI Ives" he admitted, ,"we handle an Wful lot of goods," to which one of
 Is clients replied, rather tactlessly, kwful is as good a word as can think q in the premises" -fs osA -1t