Atlanta tri-weekly journal. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1920-19??, 1924-06-19
MY WIFE AND |
BY CAROLYN BEECHER
CHAPTER XVIII

v HAD though Natalie Indifferent, cold, for
| some time. Never had she been demon
strative her caresses had been rare, but
of late I had feeling that she simply suffered
any advances I made, that they had become
almost obnoxious to her. SO I gradually
ceased offering them Yet l loved her per-
haps even more than when we were first
married
This GOODNESS was not caused by anything
7 had done, as far as l knew. Even her re-
sentiment because of my refusal to pay her
mothers bills had not seemed to bring any
added chill to her manner. She was gay,
talked brightly to me when we happened TO
be alone which was seldom, but it was as il
she had erected wall between us beyond
which | could not go.
I recalled something Garth had said when
discussing book he had read
'Most authors" said he, "ony make a bust
of marriage but he gives you the whole body
1t struck me as describing perfectly the
condition existing between Natalie and me.
To all outward appearances we were most
happy and congenial couple, yet our life to-
! gether was but the semblance of what | had
dreamed it would be-
Was Natalie satisfied with it?
I could not tell Never by word or look
had she expressed unharpiness, save in con-
nection with the one incident of her mothers.
! bills, and l sure she wasn't upset over
! that she pretended-that her illness was
assumed to compel me to her wishes in the
! matter.
| God knew I wanted her to be happy but |
| also wanted her love- that oneness in mar
riage I craved. I wanted real home where
I could stretch my legs and read or talk to
! her once in a while, instead of place to eat
and sleep, which all our home had meant.
. I was tired tired to the point of exhaustion
with the years of pleasureseeking, the abnor-
mally late hours, the lack Of any real rest
or restfulness in my home.
| IT, as I feared Natalie's indifference meant
! she no longer cared for me, how l to go
about remedying matters? Her mother was
still with and for the last month l had
escorted them to theaters, dances, ETC.; with
slavish regularity. Uncle Robert was almost
himself again and l had no excuse to refuse
SO I knew Natalie thought
| Money matters also worried me. Natalie's
| bills larger than ever, her demands for
entertainment and entertaining more extrav-
agant. One can not chase the will-o -the-wisp
| of pleasure in New York without spending.
Boxes at the theater engaged without consult
| ing me, or expensive seats when boxes weren't
! procurable, dinners and suppers at expensive
! hotels or restaurants, dancing clubs, all these
and more ate up money. The cost was far
more than I could afford. I knew her mother
/ encouraged her, l had overheard her say:
You should have everything you want,
| Natalie. You'll never be young but once and
there's no reason for you to shut yourself up;
you've no children to keep you at home"
But all these things, bad they were,
were as nothing compared to the feeling
tina Natalie had ceased to care for me.
And because Of this fear | had been cow
ardly in postponng any attempt to regulate
our affairs. But [ could wait no longer
had kept account of every penny we had
spent in the month, entertainments, my
own expenditures, etc. Taking Natalies
bills with me [ left the office in the middle
Of the afternoon and went home I would
thresh the whole thing out with her tell
her we must call a halt at once.
found her in a charming negligee, read
ing. She looked up surprised to see me, yet
! could see no pleasure in her face at my
! coming. l kissed her cheek, sat down be-
! side her and taking her bills, my tabulated
| account of other expenditures from my
| pocket, I said:
Il came home early, Natalie. so we could
have an uninterrupted talk We can go on
! in this way no longer" I gave her the
amount we had spent for necessities and
entertainment, then her bills, then my own
expenses. AS you see, my personal ex-
penses are almost ridiculously small by COM
parsOn."
That's your affair. You spend what you
like" Her voice like ice.
"No-I spend only what I must. First,
this item for pleasure. We must reduce
that by two-thrds; then it will be all I
too, must be smaller, much smaller. I have
decided to have no more charge accounts
will give you an allowance for your per-
sonal needs and you must pay for every
thing and make it do l shall pay no more
bills. You can plan your expenditures SO
your allowance covers whatever you buy. 7
shall make it generous one, but you MUST
understand l shall not allow you to exceed
it,"
"Have you quite finished?" she asked.
She had not moved changed expression
while / talked.
For the present yes. 7 will pay these"
picked up the bills, "but 1t will be for the
last time Shall I close the accuonts or
would you prefer to do it yourself?"
They close automatically if 1 purchase
nothing, do they not?"
Naturally"
VERY WELL suppose you let 1t go at thta"
She was taking it better than ] had ex-
pected, yet her quiet acceptance was UNI
natural. What did It forbode?
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TIE TEDTNTITM NIIID