davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
New Britain herald., 1924-09-25
In Reverse

 (The Soda Clerk and the Flapper) "A chocolate eclair and a straw berry soda, please"
 Say. don't you ever eat anything substantial?"
 "Yes: thanks for the invitation" Don't kid yourself I'm not so dumb as you look. I'm no table nobody eats on me" ''Is that so? Well, was only trying to call your bluA. I couldn't accept your Invitation, even if 1t were o. K"
 How come?"
 T have more important engage ments."
 What are you doing tonight. for instance"
 "who wants to know?" "A friend of mine." Well, tell him I am enrolling in several evening courses at the Ex- tension university this evening, and my evenings will be taken tip from now on"
 You don't tell me-" T do."
 You don't happen to be taking a course labeled Applied Psychology. do you?"
 T do. But what Is that to you?' "A lot. I'm giving the course"
 Robert c. O'Brien.
New Britain herald., 1924-09-25
A MnsEs GONE WRONG

Senator George H. Moses of New Hampshire has an idea that if the Republican party kept the Mellon plan of cutting taxes on big incomes by 50 per cent more in the fore front it would go better with the party.
 Senator Moses is chairman of the Republican senatorial campaign committee What he evidently means 10 imply is that a promise of cutting the big incomes will elicit more cam paisn funds from the possessors of the incomss
New Britain herald., 1924-09-25
Observations On The Weather

Washington, Sept. 25.-Forecast for Southern New England: Fair tonight, heavy frost in interior; Fri day fair; not much change in tenn perature; gentle northeast and east winds.
 Forecast for Eastern New York: Fair tonight and Friday; not much change in temperature; moderate nortehast winds.
 Conditions: Cloudy and rainy wetather prevails this morning in the southern districts from the Gulf coast northward to Tennessee. Pleasant weather continues in other sections. The temperature is low from Michigan eastward to Maine. Frosts were reported in the eastern portion of the Lake region and in New England.
 Conditions favor for this vicinity fair weather followed by increasing cloudiness and rising temperature.
New Britain herald., 1924-09-25
GAHSs T7uadT T5hol,b {, MAxsoS Exx.n Auns
 THE FUN SHOP
 tBy Dorothy M, coyle) /
Ahb FUN phoE tBy Dorothy NJ. coyle)

Come readers. how'd with care and
 woe, And to The Fun Shop let us go. It Is the queerest little store! It has no windows, shelves or door, No stock, like butter, eggs or meat, No space upon business street. It has no aisles; .. But there you'll fnd--some good,
 some worse All kinds of jokes. and yards of
 verse;
 Smart epigrams and sayings gay To chase your stupid cares away And leave the smiles. Y In stock that's fresh and never stale, You'll find a short, absorbing tale, A choice assortment of keen wit, While Jingle-Jangles add their bit. And always bobbed- hair girls and
 jazz
 Are sure to get the jolly ''razz." You see, The Fun shops just .
 column To keep the world from being
 solemn.
New Britain herald., 1924-09-25

politics that Morris won't care to learn, and that is to regard it as a game" He is a type of gentleman who regards 1t more as an oppor- unity to serve his fellow citizens Tho less he learns" about the lower realms of politics the more ingratiat- ing he remains as q candidate.
New Britain herald., 1924-09-25
Mourners to Settle
 Trouble Out of Court

New York, Sept. 25.-Count and Countess Costa Morner, the latter known professionally as Peggy Hop kins Joyce, actress, have agreed to settle out of court their martial dit- faculties, Frank c. Delaney, attorney for Miss Joyce. announced last night. He said that a compact had been drawn up in which the count agrees
New Britain herald., 1924-09-25
Reverse English


 Little /WiIburs frequent injuries resulted from riding his new tricycle. naturally worried his mother. One day. hearing him scream, she ran out in time to see him rise from the gutter. He had a great gash over his. eye, and the blood flowed freely She. examined his wound closely and exclaimed Thank God it's your head instead of your eye"
 Tn little while, properly bandas- ed. Wilbur went visiting his friends to show off his wounds.
 ''Lawsie mel" said one neighbor, ''what did you mother say?"
 She jest said: Thank God I got knocked in the head" said Wilbur.
 Sarah Frances Pool.
New Britain herald., 1924-09-25
.SWEETHEARTS TILL
 DEATH PARTS THEM
This Is What ReY. |. K. Flight Says. Woman Near Breakdown
Ry Tha AshocIatAd Press.


 Nashville, Ill.,, Sept. 25. --" The Rev. Lawrence M. flight, held in jail here in connection with the poison plot that cost the lives of his wife, Anna, and the husband of his confessed accomplice, Mrs. FL sic Sweeten, today showed no out ward strain of his plight, while Mrs. Sweeten, in Jail at Salem. H., worried more over tho future of her three children than her im- prisonment.
 Mrs Sweeten and are still sweethearts and will remain sweet hearts until death parts us." the minister said.
 Jail attendants said the Rev. MT. Night was joyiala nd talked freely. He mentioned his children and said for their sake he repented more than ever of having committed the crime through which they lost their mother. Mrs. Sweeten was visited yesterday by Christopher c. Sweet. en, her father.in-law, and their conversation mainly regarded the future of her children. She has ex- pressed a desire that they be cared for in a Masonic orphanage.
 Mrs. sweeten's apathy to food has aroused. concern. The only nourishment she has taken since she was brought here Tuesday was & glass of milk, late yesterday. Dr. s. A. Thompson said last night she was on the verge of & nervous breakdown.
 Salem H., Sept. 25.-A glass of milk taken by Mrs. sweeten tonight was the first kind of nourishment she has had since she was brought to this jail. It was served by Sheriff Vogt who asked her wheth- CT zhe wanted more and she replied in the negative. Milk, it Is said, has been the only nourishment on which Mrs. eweeten has sustained herself since the death of her hus- band.
 It was related here tonight by Sheriff Yogt that he had learned from women in Ina who purchased milk from Mrs. sweeten that milk had been her only food since the death of sweeten. July 2S, last
New Britain herald., 1924-09-25
NO BOUNDARY SETTLEMENT

Belfast, Ireland, Sept. 25.-un- qualified contradiction Of the re. port published in London that an agreement on the boundary ques- tion had been reached between the Ulster premier and the head of the Free State executive council was authorized today by the deputy premier of Northern Ireland, Hugh Pollock,
New Britain herald., 1924-09-25
spa,rneti

 Up the familiar path I so, And tap upon your door; Alas! You will not heed my woe; You bid me come no more! I write you loving letters penned With tears!--In travail born! An. me! Each humble line I send, You treat with utter scorn! And must I always plead in vain? Be ever answered Nay? Beware! The lowliest worm in fain To face about some day! Ay. Then in words that flame and
 burn,
 I'll boldly say to you: Unless you pay your bill, we'll turn The gas off till you dol"
 Clarence M. Lindsay.
New Britain herald., 1924-09-25

Many accidents are happen ing now where the passengers feel that the driver has been going too fast. but they are re- lactant to say anything to him. It is their duty to do 50. They are sharers in the risk; they should share the responsibility, even to the extent of ruffling his feelings. There IS certain intoxication that comes from the long running of a car that blinds the driver to the real risks which he may be taking"
New Britain herald., 1924-09-25
MORRIS AND HIS SPEECH

Charles G. Morris. candidate for governor on the Democratic ticket is one of those neophytes in politics of which the Hartford Courant thinks little, provided they are iden- tifled with Democratic party and not with the Republicans. All persons identified with the Republican party, the Hartford G. o. P. luminary will contend with all the vitriolic vivacity tn it's vertebra, are models of intelh- gence. Nobody but a Republican has any brains at all; indeed, they are scarcely human.
 Which probably explains the fol- lowing Rrom the columns of our contemporary on State street:
 "The effect of Mir. M1rris's
 maiden speech was to show
 that he has much to learn about
 politics, and the party whose
 standard he is expected 10 carry.
 He begins his campaign by step
 ping Backwards. He viii know
 more about the game as the
 campaign progresses" "
 All Of which would be important if true. But there is r..ething about
New Britain herald., 1924-09-25
The E.lilor,s Gosslp shon

Do you long to tell your boss to take a good running jump some where?
 Get a new job irst--and tell him!
 Do you alwas wonder what would happen if you turned in false alarm of fire?
 Use some friends phone-and find outl
New Britain herald., 1924-09-25
DUTY OF PASSENGERS

In commenting upon the plunge of an automobile through the rail ing of bridge in Boston, resulting in the loss of five lives, the Boston Herald planes the tragedy upon too much speed, and adds that pas sengers in cars are in duty bound to counsel caution when drivers go too fast. Says the Boston paper:
New Britain herald., 1924-09-25
4 Vital Question in the Case

Judge:-"Witness, tell this jury your opinion, if any, of what bear ing. if bearing it may be called, the extremecost of cosmetics has on this particular case?"
 Witness:--"Yessir--I seen it my self. judge"
 John M. Wells.
New Britain herald., 1924-09-25

"The great problem is that of dis tribution." Nature falls down here, also. Observe the paunch.
New Britain herald., 1924-09-25

No people is capable Of self-gov- ernment until it can see a detour sign without pouting.
New Britain herald., 1924-09-25

Doubtless ancient civilization per- ished when everybody became a pub- lie job holder and died of pique when none were left to meddle with.
New Britain herald., 1924-09-25

The only profitable advertising medium
 in the City, Circulation books and press room always open to advertisers.
New Britain herald., 1924-09-25
Member Audit Bureau Of Circulation.

The A. B. c. Is a national organization which furnishes newspapers and adver- tisers with strictly honest analysis of circulation. our circulation statistics are based upon this audit. This tnsures protection against fraud in newspaper distribution figures to both national and local advertisers.
New Britain herald., 1924-09-25
Modern Improvements

Crabshaw:--"So you made a hit in school today when the teacher asked you to spell Springfield? How did you spell it?"
 Willie:-"WBZ."
New Britain herald., 1924-09-25
The Reason

Morgan: "Filkins complains that he isn't getting his proper meals these days" schuyler:-"No; his wife is on . diet"
 Marvin Creager.
New Britain herald., 1924-09-25

People are funny. The more they learn to value fresh air. the more they try to build their houses air tight.
New Britain herald., 1924-09-25
No Doubt About It

Young hopeful:--"Say, dad, write me check for fifty, and I'll be ever- lastingly indebted to you" Wise pa:--"Yes, my son, I'm sure of that"
 Ernest C. Rutherford.
New Britain herald., 1924-09-25
As Tn a looking Glass

Modern daughter to her bald headed father:-"Lean over this way little papa, I want to see if my nose needs powder"
 Donald M Davenport.
New Britain herald., 1924-09-25

The great improvement in Firpo's left shows how quickly a good press agent can get results.
New Britain herald., 1924-09-25

The Herald is on sale daily in New York at Hotalngs News stand. Times Square: Schultz News stand. Entrance Grand Central. 42nd street.
New Britain herald., 1924-09-25

No wonder Cain turned out badly. There wasn't single book on child psychologist
New Britain herald., 1924-09-25

It is especially difficult to love q man whose conscience lets him enjoy things yours forbids.
New Britain herald., 1924-09-25

Queen Victoria was taught court etiquette fin her nursery as the court was too corrupt for her mother to allow her to attend it.
New Britain herald., 1924-09-25
Tor,estaued

Forestalled ' Ted:--"As she told you she'd never marry, why don't you try to set her to change her mindT
 Ned:--''It's no use now. my boy. That old rival of mine has done itj'
 Clara Brody.
New Britain herald., 1924-09-25

A good party man is one who can be counted on to kill the vote Of an- other good party man.
New Britain herald., 1924-09-25

Think how the Herrin problem would worry America if 1t were located in Europe.
New Britain herald., 1924-09-25

A military nation has the faults of sport model-too much power and not enough utility.
New Britain herald., 1924-09-25

A destructive instinct doesn't handicap boy; he will make good baggage handler.
New Britain herald., 1924-09-25
CATCH GEM THIEF
New York Police Nab Man Suspect cd of s2s,00o Jewel Theft From Miss Edith Bobe.

New York, Sept. sS.-Tn the arrest early, today of John Feinstein, 24, who gave his occupation as that of chauffeur, police believe they have one of the four men who on the night of September Is held up and robbed Miss Edith Bobe of s2S,00o in jewels and assaulted her escort, Robert L, Hague, marine superin- tendent Of the Standard on conn pany, in the hallway Of the Bobe apartment. The couple were re- turning from a fashionable dinner party.
 Police refused to relate the cir cumstanees which led to Feinstein's arrest, or to comment, other than to say that they believe they have over whelming evidence against him.
New Britain herald., 1924-09-25

God made the country, but only election year makes 1t influential.
New Britain herald., 1924-09-25

Correct this sentence: Tt is & great privilege" said the husband of ten years, to kiss your dear hands"
New Britain herald., 1924-09-25

The objective case seems an af- fectation. You never heard an owl say ''To-whom."
New Britain herald., 1924-09-25

The Darwinian theory seems rea- sonable when you observe how many rabbits become seal.
New Britain herald., 1924-09-25
Brothers fin labor

Bill!--"I belong to the union." John:-"I don't work hard either"
 Edward Pike.
New Britain herald., 1924-09-25

Have you ever wondered how to make" The Fun shopf
 Read tho department every day. then send in your jokes anecdotes. epigrams, verse, bright sayings Of children, burlesque. etc.
New Britain herald., 1924-09-25

A hick complex is just a desire to SC New York ball club get licked.
New Britain herald., 1924-09-25
Facts and Fancies
BY ROBERT CULLEN

Let Wales occupy Page while he can, He will be king some day.
New Britain herald., 1924-09-25
Msmher of thr Assncintcd Prcss.

The Associated Press Is exclusively en- titled 10 the use for republication Of all news credited to it or not otherwise credited in this paper and also local news published herein.
New Britain herald., 1924-09-25

It is all right to have business men in office if they will remember whose business 1t is.
New Britain herald., 1924-09-25

Do You Know That A course grade of sand-paper ruh- bed over A wart will remove 1t in timer
New Britain herald., 1924-09-25
;&2:-2e.. R0ISIz-'.SI

It frequently happens that the first false step Is stepping on the gas.
New Britain herald., 1924-09-25

We are rapidly becoming idol worshippers. That type of patriotism which consists in worship of the fiag-often ex- hibited by the biggest grafters in the community-has reached stage where it would be anus ing if it were not so serious a reflection upon our intelligence,
 We welcome this (the higher courD decision. We cannot af- ford 10 establish the principle that anything which is flag is so sacred that even If a man removes it from his own pren- ises he is liable to assault, ar- rest, fine and imprisonment, by more perfervid patriots"
New Britain herald., 1924-09-25

Business prlce ,.. psb Editorial Rooms ,,,., g2d
New Britain herald., 1924-09-25
TELEPHONE CALLS

Entered at the Post office at New Britain
 as Second Class Mail Natter
New Britain herald., 1924-09-25
Tn Exact Terms

In Exact Terms He's a friend I praise with vim Friends like that l ask of Fate. Much it is I owe to him Ninety dollars up to datel
 --L. M. N
New Britain herald., 1924-09-25
INSULTING THE FLAG"

The owner of an apartment house in New York was attacked and badly battered by the janitor-an ex- marine-because the owner removed an old and dilapidated flag from the window of an unrented room on the eighth floor of his apartment house on Memorial day.
 The owner said he removed the flag because it was so shabby that it was a discredit to the apartment. The janitor had put it there and after the fight with the owner he filed a charge Of tearing down the flag against the owner and the latter's arrest followed
 The owner of the property egas held without bail in jail over night and fined $50 next day. He appealed to the appellate court, where the finding was reversed and the $50 ordered paid back. The higher court said there was only one question to be considered-who had authority on the premises. The high court added there was no evidence of an attempt to insult the flag.
 The Boston Herald made the fol- lowing statements regarding the in- cident and resulting court case which have caused much comment:
New Britain herald., 1924-09-25

Nb,VU n tNT.
 se.O0 Three Month, 75c. a Month.
New Britain herald., 1924-09-25
New Britain Herald HERALD PUBLISHING COMPANY
 x.. t.-ti. fp,,aan, ES,on,naN
sunscRpTIoN RATES

Issued Daily Sunday ESeeptedl At Herald Bldg 67 Church Street
New Britain herald., 1924-09-25

Copyright 1924. Reproduction
 forbidden). |.
The Kennewick courier-reporter. [volume] (Kennewick, Wash.) 1914-1938, 1924-07-03
MYTH AS TO THE DWARFs
Supposed to Hold Up the Four Cor.
ners of the Earth-Named East
West, North and South.

Dwarfs are inhabitants Of the in
terror of the earth and especially of
large isolated rocks, In Scandinavian
mythology. A dwarf was set by the
gods at the corner of each of the four
quarters of the earth to bear up the
sky, and they were named East, West.
North and South. F
All the dwarfs were esteemed great
artists in working metals, and wea-
pons of marvellous properties were
said to be produced from the subter-
ranean workshops. The dwarfs could
not endure the sunlight, and If its
rays touched them they were turned
into stone. If man met dwarf
away from his rock and could throw
steel between him and il, il was be-
lieved that thereby his habitation was
closed up and that anything in his
power could be extorted from him.
In the old Morse, echo is called the
dwarf language" preferably because
It was thought to be produced by the
dwarfs within mountains initiating the
sounds which they heard Without
Detroit News.
Chess-Mad Village.
Stroebeck in central Germany. Is a
village devoted to chess since 1O11
when a Count Gunnelin was impris-
oned there and to pass the time made
a chessboard and chessmen. Then he
played with his jailers. The whole vii
lage took to the game and has played
II ever since to the complete exclusion
Of all other pastimes. Old and young.
men and women play it; the inhabi-
tants are seldom seen without a chess
board; the children take chessboards
to school; at the schools instruction is
given In chess daily; every day there
are chess competitions. The village
hosiery is called the "Chess Inn" Yet,
strangely enough, Stroebeck has never
produced a worlds chess champion.
Hindu Rescued by Monkey Army.
The Hindus have legend that
Hanuman, the monkey-faced god, with
the aid Of a monkey army, helped res
cue the wife Of the divine hero Rama
from demon Another legend is that
Hanuman brought men a stolen gift.
the mango, valued Indian fruit. For
the theft the monkey was condemned
to death by fire, but 1t escaped with
only its hands. feet and face burned,
and these have been black ever since.
The Hanuman monkey In his native
land is privileged being. In some
Hindu communities these monkeys live
In the top stories Of the homes of the
natives. If one native bears another
grudge, he places rice or corn on the
enemy's roof, and the monkey tears
open the roof to secure the particles
which have fallen into the crevices, so
the house is opened to the rain.-De-
troit News.
The Kennewick courier-reporter. [volume] (Kennewick, Wash.) 1914-1938, 1924-07-03

for an extended visit on the Atlantic
coast. While there she will visit Nor
folk Virginia, Old Point Comfort,
Annapolis, Maryland and Washington
ID. C. On the return trip DIR. Hud-
son will visit at Evansville, Indiana
where she formerly practiced her
profession. % n
On Thursday afternoon the COM
modious living rooms of the A. C.
Hart residence We're comfortably fill
ed with members and friends Of the
Congregational Missionary society
The program, in charge of Mrs. Ely,
was a resume of the past several
months study work on Japan and
partook Of the nature of a pageant,
which presented aspirations and ac-
complishments of the women Of ia
pan in a very vivid manner and was
most pleasing. AT the refreshment
hour the tea served was special
blend, Favored with Jasmine flowers
This tea was sent by missionary to
The Kennewick courier-reporter. [volume] (Kennewick, Wash.) 1914-1938, 1924-07-03

Mrs. Woodward, who in turn present
ed Mrs. Hart with a small box which
the hostess courteously served for
the pleasure Of her guests.
Mrs. +. II. Lampson has been en-
gagged in civic service this week
which should result in many names
being added to the registration books.
Mrs. Lampson has secured a list Of
those whose names, formerly appear
ed on the books but who have not as
yet registered this year and has
either phoned them, or If they had
no phone asked nearby neighbors Co
remind them to register so that their
names be on the list sent out early
in July to the secretary Of state and
thereby securing literature regarding
initiative and referendum measures
and consequently when they come to
vote, know how TO do so intelligently
and without waste Of time About
1874 Were reached in this way. This
is patriotic home service indeed.
The Kennewick courier-reporter. [volume] (Kennewick, Wash.) 1914-1938, 1924-07-03
Mrs. v. O. Price is visiting spo.

Mrs. v. o. Price is visiting Spo-
kane friends this week.
Rev. L. ]. Aldrich will conduct SER
vices in the Congregational church
Sunday morning. +a1
Mr.. and Mrs. A. Hodge, w. f.
Byrd and Russell Day drove to Walla
Walla Saturday to attend district
picnic of the Standard Oil company.
A. Wallace and Ken Guyer of Spo-
kane, stopped over in Kennewick on
Wednesday. They were making a
flight to Herminston to spend the
Fourth. -, s~ ..... ~ .-.
Mr.. and Mrs. w. T. Tracy have
shipped their household goods to Sc
attic and will leave here by automo-
bile the latter part of the week to
make their home in that city.
Members of the Romany club. in
GLIDING Mrs. Edward Sheppard, Mrs
Elizabeth Kemph, Ardiee Mae Shep.
pard, Mrs. E. r. Carnahan, Mrs. Alex
Bier, Mrs. A. P. Durbin and Mrs. c.
McKain, will drive to Mountain Home
eight miles from Dayton, for ter
days. vacation. They will make the
trip in the Sheppard car. -s a. ssA.ss
Mr.. and Mrs. w. R. Crawford NOV.
ed last week to their new home in
Lewiston, Idaho. Mr.. Crawford trad
ed his place in Section Seven to John
w. Root for small apartment hous3
in Lewiston. In point of ownership
Mr.. Crawford is one Of the pioneers
of the Section Seven neighborhood
He purchased his place there nearly
20 years ago, altho he did not come
here to make his home permanently
until several years later. u
The Kennewick courier-reporter. [volume] (Kennewick, Wash.) 1914-1938, 1924-07-03
HIGHLANDS

80
Martin Hudnall was at Wallula a
few days last week.
Miss Della Hudnall returned last
week from visit with relatives in
Tacoma.
Miss Helen Truman is in Seattle
where she will spend the summer
with friend.
w. f. Sonderman had a crew busy
while the water is turned off, clean
ing obstructing mud from the open
bitches. %
Merle Muncey arrived from Seattle
and is spending his vacation with
home folks. Ha
Mrs. A. F Woodward, of Walla
Walla, was the house guest of Mrs.
A. C. Hart last week. On Friday af-
ternoon both ladies were guests of
DR.. Mary Hudson.
DIR. Mary d. Hudson left Monday