Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1924-03-27
SOME GONE DY IN
TRAGEDY OF OIL
SCANDAL INQUIRIES PROVIDE
MANY A SMILE FOR PERSONS
WITH A SENSE OF HUMoR.
by EDWARD 3. CLARK

y. D.
Washington.-H umor helps to save
many Washington situation. There
is comedy even in the tragedy of oil.
Washington gets its daily Smile as
a third partner in the firm of Sheer
l. Sob.
Perhaps never before in the history
of things legislative and economic
tave such desperate efforts been made
to save somewhat undistinguished
citizens from appearing on the witness
stand The kilograms which have
passed one way or the other between
Florida and Washington, all connected
with the attempt to save an editor
from an appearance before the inquisi-
tors, have been multitudinous in num-
Der, and in considerable part mystic
in contents. But the light of the ex-
pert student has been let in upon some
of them and finally the world has
been allowed to know that in the
phraseology Of the dispatches ZAP
ples' meant Fall, the Count" meant a
more or less humble editorial writer
who perhaps cannot. read his title
clear, while "WGPX," or something
similar, meant the attorney general
Of the United States.
Also there are several ks" to de-
note still unknown persons and thus
algebra has played its part in the
oily drama. There is nothing new
under either the sun or the oil lamp.
A bit of description of give and
take that one finds in "As You Like
It" fits only the daily scene in the
senate Office room whose four walls
encompass the activities of the oil in
yestigators and the witnesses, and the
listenings of the packed audience.
As In the Old Comedy.
Some of the witnesses have not
their tempers altogether in hand, and
this applies even more forcibly and
truthfully to some of the members Of
the investigating committee. In the
committee room day after day one
hears as a starter the Retort Cour-
teous or the Quip Modest, to be fol-
lowed quickly as tempers rise and
tongues get beyond control by the
Reply Churlish, the Reproof Valiant,
the Countercheck Quarrelsome, the
Lie with Circumstance and then,
sadly enough, the Lie Direct.
Every morning and every evening
one Washingtonian asks another In
the words of Polonius, "What do you
read?"
And Citizen Hamlet responds:
words, words, words"
One can go on bit and say IN a
quotation from the greatest of the
plays, "They have a plentiful lack of
wit"
Washington is wondering a little
bit if the country is getting tired of
the oil investigation and its appur-
tenances. Perhaps not, but certain 1t
is that Washington is getting tired Of
the extraneous things that are lugged
by the heels into the inquiry. things
which have no mortal or immortal
connection with oil, with bribery, with
letter writing, with telegram-sending
or with telephone conversations.
Going Back to 1920.
AT this writing it appears that the
oil investigators are to dig into the
pre-convention campaign Of 1920 to
find something which may bear on
present-day scandals or rumors of
scandals
Leonard Wood, Jr., has been sub
poenaed to appear to tell what he may
know about the rumor Of an offer of
the support Of delegates in the last
Republican convention to his father,
General Wood, In exchange for a
promise to appoint the late Jake
Hamon of Oklahoma to the post of
secretary Of the interior.
It should be said at once that the
refused to consider such a PROPOSE
ton, but 1t seems that the desire to
60 into the affair is prompted by the
fact that there was another story
loose about the Washington streets
recently to the effect that some Of the
Harding lieutenants in the Republican
convention were offered delegates in
exchange for a promise to appoint Al
bert B. Fall secretary of the interior.
Both stories have been denied in toto,
and seemingly there is no truth in
them, but the whole matter Is to be
gone into and as result the oil pro-
ceedings probably will be prolonged
until hot weather comes in, and heat
is likely to make oil offensive even to
senatorial nostrils.
One finds himself wondering why
the big room In which the oil investi-
cation is being conducted always Is
packed with eager and curious aud
itors or, rather, would-be auditors. Not
one witness In ten speaks so he can
be heard beyond the seats of the COM
mitteemen. Moreover the witnesses
all have their backs to the audience.
Nevertheless, day by day crowding
mass Of people enter the room to sit
through the long hours and apparently
content If they hear only one word in
ten Of what is said. Virtually every
line of the testimony is Transcribed
and printed in the daily papers, but
hearing Is supposedly more satisfactory
than reading, and so it would be If
hearing were possible.
Inquiries All Summer
Republican leaders in Washington
are saying that activities along inves-
tigating lines, which they assert are
intended largely for political purposes,