The Butler County press. [volume] (Hamilton, Ohio) 1900-1946, 1924-09-12
DR.. Syntax Was
Stern Student,
but Milly Won
BY ELMER PHILLIPS
60. 1924. western Newspaper Union.


60. 1924. Western Newspaper Union.)
DocToR sYNTAx was not more
- than forty, though he seemed
bowed beneath the weight of his
recondite Investigations.
When Aloysius Benton, his friend
and colleague. died, ten years before,
leaving his twelye-year-old daughter
to Doctor Syntax, 1t was the most nat
ural thing in the world that the kind
ly old doctor should take the child
into his household. After old Janet
died, Milly quite naturally became the
doctors housekeeper.
And now certain persons had whis-
pered that 1t was not proper for an
unmarried man. even professor, to
live alone In the house with the girl
Doctor Syntax had been in love
when he was young man. The OBJ
ject of his devotion had married an
other; but, though he had long ceased
to think of her, the memory OF that
first love had chung around him like
radiant cloud, softening his spirit and
fitting it for high idealism. Some
times the thought of Milly had of
late, revived that memory.
But when the ultimatum went forth
that society considered Milly ought to
be relegated to another sphere, the
professor had ridiculous dream. 1t
was absurd, TO hope that Milly, the
belle OF the little town and he
nm old fogy OF forty!
At any rate, he must tell Milly.
And he did 80, when he met her In
the library after dinner. which the
| professor always took alone.
My dear" he said, II have an un-
| pleasant thing to say TO you 1t is a
| problem"
Cant you solve 1t by algebra?' in-
| quired Milly. looking at him with q
twinkle in her eyes You know, you
| always say everything can be solved
| by algebra.
And so 1t can, my dear" said Doc
| tor Syntax.
You remember how you found your
spectacles,' pursued Milly mischiev-
| ously
But this is serious, Milly,' said
Doctor Syntax Some people in this
| town have apparently been putting
their heads together and have come to
the conclusion that it is not right for
single girl, even an adopted daugh-
| ter, to keep house for an old bachelor
| like me. 1t Is preposterous Idea,
1 hn nf ir ntr1in tc
the symbol X. always handed when 1t
is not wanted and never lranslatable
| into precise terms until the final solu-
| ton"
well, / have come to the same con-
clusion myself" said Milly calmly.
"What!' exclaimed Doctor Syntax
He had expected scene, strife, war
and here was Milly calmly acquiescing
| In his decision. But what are you go
Ing to do, my dear?" he continued u
can't bear the thought Of losing you. y
| you needn't lose me-" said Milly
her plate. But even then there was
a mischievous twinkle in her eyes.
This is very strange, my dear.
said Doctor Syntax. You have ac
cepted the public opinion as to the
inadvisability of your remaining here
as my housekeeper, and yet you say
| that / need not lose you. Logically
that implies that you could propose tC
remain here in some other capacity
and yet / fail to see what that coulC
be, or how 1t could affect public Opin
| ion"
(Which we have designated x sale
Milly, raising her eyes to the profes
sor's for one feeting moment. Ant
In that moment the professor fell
strangely Disconnected and ye
strangely glad. Unconsciously hi
threw back his shoulders
well, my dear, suppose the vari
ants are Y and T." he said. Now Wa
have an indeterrhinate equation. \
equals or z multiplied by the un
known factor, which shall be NJ
why not make 1t U?" asked Milly
Make it U. Milly? The letter U Il
never used in mathematics excep
when the other letters Of the alphabe
have been almost exhausted
II should really prefer you to make
it U," persisted Milly.
very we'll 1t shall be, then,
said the professor
"Oh, I'm afraid that would nevel
do" said Milly. But seeing that tn,
professor was only staring at her Ii
perplexity, she resigned herself. Yer.
well Go on" she said.
at Is obvious, them that X equals
YU or ZU," said Doctor Syntax
warming to his task.
"YU," / think" said Milly gravely.
"In that case" said the professor
X, the unknown factor, equals Y di
vided by Y. Now, algebra helps III
no moreNunless we can state u in posi-
tive terms. Now let e be the pOssi
bility Of your remaining here in tn
capacity of-secretary, let US say, an,
f the possibility of becoming-let u
us say my stenographer. Then
equals"
"YF," said Milly, triumphantly.
"Eh?" asked Doctor Syntax INC
my dear, it couldn't equal YF, be
cause"
"Then shall co. said Milly, risini
from her chair, and the professor wa
amazed to hear strangled sob.
"Now, Milly,' he said gravely, real
ly you women are very illogical VI
is impossible. Stop! Listen to me
Nilly before YOU 90 out of that door