The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1924-11-13
With The
|Alibi Artists
Al Cross Section Of the
Daily Grind III Judge
Schuldt's Court.
Read EN- and Weep.

Corner Cutting De Luxe.
Last Sunday night about half
past ten / was running up Penn
sylvania avenue for q right turn
into Seventh street. ! was about
half way around the corner
when the defendant. In an Essex
touring car made short cut
over the sidewalk from behind
me-,
Ran over i the sidewalk at
Pennsylvania avenue and Seventh
,street2'
.A yes. sir"
ANY people there?" -
There were four or five stand
ing on the corner, but only one
was in any danger-he was old
and couldn't jump quick-but he
was pretty well Il toward the
back OF the sidewalk, and clear
Of the car except for the right
front fender. That knocked his
cane out Of his hand. and he fell
down. But he wasn't hurt any.
The others were right light on
their feet, and the defendant
didn't get within q yard Of them.
When he came down off the
sidewalk he smashed my rear
fender. speeded up a little, and
smashed the front one. Then
he turned around and yelled, j
wish I'D knocked you over. You
white - - --. and
stepped on the gas up Seventh
street.
q. was sorry he felt that way
about It, ana hoped ! might G0othe
him with q few words or kick
in the liver. He was out Of sight
before ] reached e street, but !
kept on Nup Seventh street, look.
ing for a crowd. l found one two
blocks further up, where an Of
ficer was helping the defendant
out of his car.
Just as he left his seat he
reached around toward his hip
pocket, but the officer reached
first and told him the shooting
galleries were all closed for the
night and there was man around
at number One that wanted to
see him anyhow. and would he go
in the patrol wagon or the ambu
lance. !"
The COP: ST was at Seventh and
G streets when he came up Sew.
enth zigzagging all over the
street."
Counsel: can over the street?
Isn't that a trifle overdrawn?"
"Well, all over the wrong side
of the street. stepped forward.
Signalled him to stop, and Jumped
sc he made q sharp. turn at me
and choked bin engine against
sewer digging apparatus there.
He was the third drunkest man
I've arrested this year. The rec
ords show he has never had q
drivers permit"
i. Boob: dI'm guilty to all charges,
but I wasn't drunk"
'tWhat were you--dOped?"
mo sir. ] wasn't doped, eth
err"
ssThat makes 1t all the worse.
then, if you did all those things
in cold blood. Why were you
driving without a permit?'
IT don't think that's my fault.
/ asked the Traffic Bureau for
one and they wouldn't give it
to me-"
.'They seem to have the right
idea. What else have you got
to say?'
~ want probation"
"You need tia lot of it.
but you'll have to go to Occoquan
TO get It. Driving while drunk,
thirty days straight; coiliding,
$40; leaving after colliding, $40;
no permit, $40"
That's 1920 besides the thirty
days"
yes. The law doesn't allow
me to make II any more.
ST can't raise $120-can't
have probation for that7''s
''Give him ninety days Of Oc-
coQuan probation, Mr.. Clerk"
Quarantined.
NAH wife an little chillun
done got sick, yo' onnah. All
axes probation"
Whats the matter with your
wife and children?"
''Dey done got de blue bonnet
plague"
"Got the what?"
Counsel: He means the boo
bonic plague, your honor-that
new disease they have out In Los
Angeles"
That's what fWashington's got
too---the boob-onic plague. But
probation isn't the cure for It.
You'll have to do your thirty