The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1924-10-15
! The Advertiser
BY DIR. FRANK CRANE

r FAS the advertiser any limit? Can ne
RI put his signs anywhere he pleases!
Can he display any kind of sign be
pleases, no matter how ugly?
Is the soft and modest desire to look out
upon pleasant scenes, is this sentiment OF
civic beauty, of any Importance when 1t
clashes with the desire of MIR. Einstein to
sell pants at amazing valuesE
Of course there are some extremes to which
the advertisers hardly dare go. So as
have heard, nobody has yet posted up on the
inner walls of the church the illustrated
merits of Somebody's cora plasters.
The question may be raised Has per-
son any inherent right to enjoy the landscape
free from the enforced contemplation OF Mr..
Johnson's Rustless Screens, and looking from
a car window are we going too far when we
ask the handsome gentleman who make sueh
meritorious toilet powder to remove his beau
tiful mustache from our range of vision!
A man took tour in Europe. When be
got home he was asked about the places where
he had been. Il don't know" he said. IN
Paris l rode about good deal. but all
saw was mostly Dubonnet and Byrrh. AT
London / got on bus plastered with adver,
tisements and went out to see Bryant and
NAYS Matches and BASES Ale, returning by
street where we saw Sunshine Soap and
Cadbury's Chocolate. At Lucerne we visited
the lake and gazed for an hour at Nolseless
Sewing Machines Down the Rhine voyagers
used to view castles, ruins and cities; now
we pass the Purest Spring Water, the Cosiest
Underwear, and the Suddiest Soap. couldn't
see the Pyramids for Choicest Hams, and the
Coliseum at Rome was obscured by Unex
celIed Chewing Gum. reached home and
recognized dear old New York by the signs
of my patent medicine friends"
This man exaggerated The ham adver-
tisements do not extend entirely around the
Pyramids.
But is there any place where we may ask
the hustler to stop in his hustling and give
us chance to enjoy life?
OF course the newspaper is his for he pays
the bills The man who hands out three cents
for his daily paper doesn't pay for the white
paper, let alone the black smear Without
the advertiser we could have no newspaper
at the present rates hence we wish 1t dis
tinctly understood that whoever puts an ao
in the paper and especially in this paper, can
go as far as he likes, and none of these re
marks are intended for him. We know which
side of our bread is buttered
But it is a little trying for a stranger IL
New York, when he is going up to Ninety
sixth street in the subway, to try to set
where he is by looking out the window. Th'
first stop is Peerless Pills, the next is Hope
| less Hosiery, and then nee mas out InaL ~
the stations are named Peerless Pills. OF
course, he cannot understand word the
guard shouts. So he gets off at Unexcellet
Chewing Gum and, coming up to the light OF
day, finds out he is somewhere over In the
Bronx.
| Has the street ear company a legal rlgh'
to thrust upon your notice the exceeding
merits OF Thrifliman's sSOap when you are
| trying to compose your mind by few chunkt
of New Thought, or while you are giving
| friend of yours Absent Treatment! Juss
about the time you get spiritual strange
hold on his rheumatism your mind is diverted
by Syrup's Throat Lotions and your golden
meditations chased away by Ready Rheuma.
tism Cure.
Has the mediator and beauty seeker anJ
rights? Did not the Pennsylvania Railway
Company cheat its stockholders when they
put up a station in New York and let all
that good advertising space go to waste?
Paris, London, Berlin and Rome are as
bad as we are, to the extent of their re
tsources. OF course, they cannot put out the
stars with electric signs as we do, and Broad
lway still leads the world in gur-rand munich
pal exhibitions of tooth pastes, corsets, au-
tomobiles. beers, oatmeals, and suits marked
down to 5000.
! We are evidently here to sell goods. Wen
sell 'em, too, if we nave to smudge all erea-
ton with advertisements.
u Some day wen get soap ad on the moon
and breakfast food sign on the sun. 4