The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1924-11-28

With The
IAlibi Artists
"a Cross Section Of the
Daily Grind in Judge
Schuldt's Court.
Read EN- and Weep.
KEEP TT DARK"
A Ono Act Play In Three Acts.
Nike a lot Of others.)
ACT,
Read EN- and Weep.

table are seated representatives
OF the. Graustark daily press
The Graustark Times, The Graus-
tark Evening Star, The Post, The
News, and The Herald. They are
yawnfng and look bored. 1t is
evident that they are waiting Tor
the Big Case to come UP.
The clerk: Case 67,911M is
continued until December g." Tie
calls the next case.)
Enter Ali Biman Ben smoker.
Ali: whispering to the Star mani
WAS that THE case?"
Star man: YES"
Ali: THE one about the Prime
Minister'S lieutenant's chauffeur
driving forty-five versts IN hour
over Graustark Creek bridge and
slamming the two shepherds?
What's it continued for?"
Star man: That's what I want
to know-let's ask the court, as
soon as recess is announced"
"a witness had a lit. Bailifts,
spectators, etc., run to his an
sistance.)
Star man: Whispering ''Now!'
(aloud) May we approach the
bench, IL your honor please?"
The court: Certainly CThey
group themselves near the judged
News man--"We wish to ask
your honor why case 81, 911ls was
continued"
The court-"It was continued In
the ordinary course, on recon1fnen-
dation of the Corporation Counsel,
because of the absence of the off.
Ger in the case"
Post man-"May We ask If any
reason was given for the officers
absence?"
The court-''The court does not
know why the officer was absent,
and has given instructions that
the reason be ascertained."
Times man-"Let's go to the
Corporation Counsel" CThey go
Out.)
CURTAIN.
Note-The witness didn't really
have a fit, but that seemed to us
the most artistic opportunity for
the GrauStark Newspaper men to
interview the court. Waiting for
a recess would have been common.
place, and would require more
Wordage. We think it's much bet
ter for the witness to have a fit
don't you?
ACT II.
Scene-A street in front Of the
house Of the officer in the case.
A Cadillac limousine stops at the
curb. A keen, alert, handsome
man, In age somewhere between
thirty and forty-eight years, steps
TO the sidewalk. He Is followed
from the car by the Times man.
the Star man, the Post man, etc.
Ali flor 1t Is indeed hel-"That's
the number. 1t must be the
house."
Enter the officer in the case,
from the front door of the house.
(He speaks) well, gentlemen?"
Herald-"We're trying to find
out why you were absent from
court when case 67,911h was
called"
Officer (surprised)-"Why, was
that case called?"
Star-"It was, and the attor-
ney told the court that the Cor
poration Counsel had no objec.
ton to the case being continued,
because Of your absence. Then
we saw the Corporation Counsel
and he told US that he refused
the request for continuance"
Post" Refused twice."
Alt-"He did thrice refuse"
Herald-"Then the defense coun-
sci told the court there was no
objection"
Post-"I don't think we'd bet
ter print that"
News-"Why not?"
Might look like q knock.
Let's say there was mistake
somewhere
Times-"Not me-I'm going to
tell it just as it is"
Star-"Me too"
Ali-"I vote for mistake"
Post-"Shake!-- You're a true
blue Democrat"
News-I'm another"
Herald-"I'm q Washingtonian
and haven't got any vote. The
notions carried. We report the
defense counsel's statement was
a misunderstanding"
Star-"But we can't deceive our
readers that way"
Post-"You're damn right we
can't. How about it, Mr.. Off
GER? Do you mind telling us why
you were absent when the case
was called?"
Officer-"Sure. / got a phone
message last night that the com.
planning witnesses refused to
prosecute"
Post-"Refused to prosecute!
Why?"
officer: Dunno. There's their
address, If you want to try"
Ali: That's way out in the
suburbs, and it's long past slum
CALL"
Post: Lets see the defense
counsel-maybe he can tell us,
and he's nearer"
Star: ''That truck drivers nose
was nearly sliced off-and he re-
fuses to prosecuted?
Herald: "You talk like you'd
seen the accident"
Star: II did. 1t happened in
front Of my door. / helped carry
that truck driver out Of the road.
His nose was nearly cut Off"
Post: "In this kind Of mess,
he's better off without mis- nose"
Times: who sent you the
phone message, officer?"
Officer: "A man in the Grau-
stark District Attorneys office"
Star: "He has about as much
to do with the case as Mother
Goose"
Post: Lets see the Corpora.
ton Counsel and find out If those
two birds can stop the prosecu-
ton Of a reckless driving case. I
don't think they can"
Ali: Lets eat first"
CURTAIN.
Note: Act III will appear in
the Alibi Column Of December s.
TRANS-ARCTIC AIR
POIJTE Incl IInEc SEpIcN0