The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-12-01
Man Also Pays In Different
 Manner
By SOPHIE IRENE LOEB

4 WOMAN writes, Your article, "A The Woman Pays struck home
 She cMls herself "The Other Wo. man." She says:
 T trust you will be able to give me few words of encouragement. If not, I shall be entirely satisfied that I am wrong and give up all hopes. am not a silly, romantic young thing but woman, thirty years of age holding good position and competent in my line of business. However, love sometimes runs away with our minds and makes us need some good, sound advice. And sometimes the older we are the harder love hits us.
 "The man also pays! insist on this. The man also pays! The man in this case gave up the woman he loved and went back to the wife and children, the wife whom he did not love and could not love again.
 "Some day these two-the man and wife-will talk things over and perhaps they can come to some understanding The man would always take care of his children-he is that kind. Is it right for the wife to try and hold him when she knows that love is dead be- tween them? He has told her that he does not love her, but of course, has not mentioned anything about the wo- man.
 For the other woman there can be no other man. Is it wrong for her to keep on hoping that things will ultimately shape themselves so that she may have her share of happiness in this world-happiness that is within her grasp, and yet not?'
 In her lengthy letter she tells how the man has told her the truth about being married, and that she met him in a boarding house while his wife and children were away.
 Their friendship, which she thorough ly agrees should never have been formed," ripened into love, and all though he wanted her to run away, she would not listen to it and persuaded him to return to his wife and family.
 These things do happen, as she says, and this woman is doubtless fine type, and the whole thing is unfortunate and very difficult matter to settle, espe- cially when each of the parties is we'll meaning.
 The man pays, it is true, but not nearly so much as the, woman. I ven- ture to say his wife is the kind who is a one-man woman and may not ever love another. It is very hard for her to realize that she has lost.
 The children in the case are the big issue, and there is something to be said about mans responsibility. Is he entitled to a happiness that gives trouble to his wife and children? Hav- ing promised to love and care for them, is it fair for him to think of himself xrh .f,
 The children do make a great diff ference-and should. At least until these children are able to understand and take care of themselves, this hus- band should stand by them and his wife. The matter, believe, is up to her.
 If she insists on his remaining un- derstanding that he does not love her and does it for the sake of the children, she is bearing cross as we'll.
 After all, when a man has a con- sideration in the nature of a wife and children, he cannot hope to do that which is uppermost in his heart, but must needs make some sacrifice be- cause of his very agreement that he would do so. He is not much of a man if he does not.
 The other woman, of course, is en- titled to sympathy, but she too, as she says, has courage to go on and to give up the man until such a time as the problem is solved. These women usual ly are.
 She did the right thing when she sent him back. You can't make a world of your own and be happy ever after. There are duties to face, and sometimes you really gain more in the end by standing by them rather than by run ming away from all.
 When people mean all right and are honorable, somehow or other affairs adjust themselves and happiness does come, but to fly in the face of every thing and satisfy a new love to the dis comfort and unhappiness of all those whom you have agreed to protect and love-well, there always comes the day of reckoning.
 Happiness gained at too much ex- pense is hard to enjoy as a general proposition.