Arizona state miner., 1924-03-15
J|BES AND JOKES
To MAKE SMILES

~ AButItt@ OtEBtGGO
The Wickenburg widow who was
never known to smile nearly choked
trying to suppress laugh when she
read "Jibes and Jokes" last month.
=
Three hobos broke into a Prescott
bakery and carried off all the angel
cake. Two are angels now, and the
third is in the hospital
They got married. She was from
Phoenix, and he was from RincOn.
After the marriage they went to
Phoenix roOming house, called the
Den. Two rooms were necessary.
AS she retired CatcIaw Charlie wanted
to assist her undressing. But she OBJ
jected While she disrobed, Charlie
waited in the hall. Looking over the
transom, he saw her unscrew a cork
leg and lay it on the table; then off
came wig of bobbed hair, which she
layed beside il; false set of teeth
and glass eye went into glass of
water behind two big breast pads.
You may come in now, dear" she
called, as she hoped into bed.
Charlie entered, gave one look at
the bed and then at the table.
Aren't you coming to bed" said his
angel cake bride
He looked again at the bed. NO.
said he; "guess I'll tackle the table"
He thot there was more on the ta-
BILE than there was in the bed.
That 4 Ma Co.
Hungry Hank bought a bottle of
Gollyhorn's bootleg. After the pool
halls were all closed he was seen
dropping nickels into the radiator of
his fiivver and furiously turning the
crank. And then some dern fool had
to accuse him of being under the in.
f1uence" to his wife.
She honeyed around him all eve
ming. It was leap year dance. Bill
knew what was coming. At last she
murmured into his ear, "Why longer
tarry? Let's go and marry"
He looked skittish, and she thot
she had him. "T would if 1 could" /"
he whispered, "but my wife won't let
me-"
Patrick-Mrs. Fogarty, may Oh take
Mary Ellen to the picnic?
Mrs. F.-Oi should say not. Look
at the size of her from eating custard
pie at the last picnic.
The printer used this for a rhyme
He needed exactly another line
Tim eor
but lemme see your bank roll first.
Splinters-Nuthin' doin'! I've been
hogtied before.
Teacher-Laurence, parse the SEN
tence MARY milks the cow"
Laurence-Mary is a noun, proper
noun, etc. Cow is a noun, proper
noun, and stands for Mary.
Teacher-Why do you make cow a.
proper noun and Stands for Mary?"
Laurence-How's Mary going to
milk the cow if she don't stand for
her?
She-What's your name?
He-Corporal Trigger
She-Mine's Hannah Gum, and
every gun has to have a trigger.
Harry-Pop, you're going to see
more action in this fight for SO than
you ever saw in your life.
Pop-I dunno, son; So was all I
paid for my marriage license.
Miss Cruickshank-Ts your mule
sick?
Yavapai Keno, not eggzackly.
You see, he's so afraid I'll say whoa
an he won't hear me, that he stops
every once in awhile to listen.
Happiness Assured-My girls from
Arizona! You betcher life she can
kick. But she's the girl for me-for
candy makes her sick.
Hot Dog!-Father is the butcher,
mother cuts the meat, and I'm the
little vicente that runs around the
street
If she powders her nose look at
the back of her neck
81 washed dishes for my board y
said Weary Willie
What made you quit?" asked the
Judge.
81 lost my appetite"
Doctor-Your trouble is pyhorrea.
You ought to take your teeth out.
Toothless Tessie-f you really