The Birmingham age-herald., 1924-11-10
Why Trousers
By DIR. FRANK CRANE

EVERY once in a while woman emerges -F from the common herd and lopes around in trousers. She may be en- deavoring to show that she is emancipated or that she is a creature of reason and not con- vention, or she may be merely engaged in the ancient and honorable game of attracting at- tention. And then she may be on the stage and get money for it.
 Few phenomenon appear in this world without having beneath them some law as 6 cause. There is a profound reason for trous- CTS. They are the outward sign of deep spiritual truth, which same shall now go on to explicate.
 Skirts-that is to say, unbifurcated gar ments for the southernmost extremities of the human animal-are the universally acknowl- edged symbol of the authority of mystery. Since the time when the memory of man runneth not to the contrary, whenever any man wanted to hypnotize and rule the com mon people he draped his legs in skirts.
 Woman is the original mystery. No one ever did understand her. Among certain primitive peoples as the Druids, she was in command of the religious ceremonies. She has always been first-class prophecies and every woman to this day is somewhat of a clairvoyant and seer. If you don't believe it, try to hide something from the missus.
 Hence it was perfectly natural for mere man, when he wanted people to obey him and could not say why, to dress up like female. It would not be becoming to refer to acclesiastic robes, and so we will make an ex- ception of them. I don't want to get into trouble. But take the judge, for instance, in this country it is quite the style to bullrag him-and let us point out that when the court sits upon its bench it dresses up in women's clothing. I shrink from insinuattng anything. The college professor and the senior /&lsa signify their acceptance of all the medievalisms of college traditions by wearing gownA
 When the Noble Thrice Exalted High Cocka- forum of the lodge takes his seat and begins to manhandle the gavel he is always arrayed in flowing red, white and blue petticoat with bangles on it.
 The GOWN, in other words, is the symbol. ot AUTHORITY OF THE UNKNOWN.
 Trousers mean nationality. They stand for all the dangers of free thought, for science against nescience, for individualism against authority.
 | Just why this is so is perhaps ono of those secrets of nature we shall probably never un- derstand.
 But it is so of that there can be little doubt in the light of history. So that the adoption of western trousers by modern Japa- nese' and Chinese IS more than superficial change; it is sign that these races are emerging out of the darkness of monarchy and mystery into the glorious liberty of the twentieth century, whose heraldic bearing should be a pair of trousers.
 have always held that bankers, lawyers, and physicians, and all who think it is best for you not to try to understand" ought to be compelled to wear gowns. And think preach CTS made a mistake when they laid them off.
 The saying, "She wears the brooches" is entirely misleading. It implies that she rules But, on the contrary, when one wants to rule he puts on robe; it is when one wants to go to work that he puts on trousers.
 Imperial Caesar and all oriental and ancient autocrats naturally draped themselves in a table cloth, because they had authority over the people Abraham Lincoln wore panta- looms because he was the servant of the people.
 Have care, then ladies, how you lay aside your robes of rule for the brooches of servi- tud0.