River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1924-10-02
'AXEL'S" EXPERT ADVICE
ON FURNACE CLEANING
Glover, Wisconsin
Almost October, 1924.
De wise rabbit will keep
away from Yohn.

Dere Readers
Desc ar de tam off jear van We
qvit DUNG vat We ha ban DUNG all
sommer, and van We mieght yust ass
veil max OPP de mind dat We mieght
yust ass veil got de habit off staying
home vonce in avile and seeting on de
boosum off our family. Et take som
perseverance and wagon grease tn
du ct, but ct can be did. De only
trobble ISIS dat van Won ISIS seeting
on de family boosum he ISIS remind
ed off guide NANNY tengs yich can
no longer ban prevented. Won off. de
most unprewentable tengs dat he ISIS
remembered off ISIS dat de tam for
cleaning de furniss ha vent, and ct
ISIS now tam tn du ct.
De first teng tn du van jou begins
tn clean de furniss ISIS tn tax look
and wonder Wy on hal jou deent du ct
befoor. De second teng ISIS tn phone
five tams tn de furniss-feexer tn com
rieght away. On course jou know on
de first plass dat she wouldn't com
anyway, and dat in de annyal elac-
ton for furniss-cleaner in jour fam
ly last May jou var shosen tn dat of
ice Wit majority off all de votes in
jou flavor axcept Won. But jou phone
up de furniss-feexer yust de sam
yust tn convince Mama dat jou means
bisness. De naxt teng tn du ISIS tn
du ct joursalf. On dat point few
hints ISIS in order.
Tu begin Wit, jou should arm jour
salt Wit de following tools--a ham
mer, shissel, wire brush, a pare
off pliers Wit vire-cutter attach
ment, visking-broom, a pare off
goggles, a sheese-clot rag tn tie on
jour noce, and a sweet disposition.
De naXt teng ISIS tn remainder dat
de furniss ISIS equipped Wit an intake
and an exhaust, and dat ct deent got
no fire in ct. De tird teng ISIS tn re-
moot de cylinder-head and de ex-
haust-pipe, and knock de odder tengs
apart so bad dat ct iss too late tn
shange jour mind. Fourt, 60 after
de floos. Desc opration involves
trying tn find we're de dam tengs ISIS
ANYWAY Jou Will see dem van jou
look in de intake. After jou look,
say, "Now / lay me-" took long
breat, stock jour shirt in, and go tn
ct. Going tn ct means pushing jour
salt into de furniss through de intake
hole. De head should vent in first,
and after dat, Wit planta off pushing
and viggling, de remains will follow.
Vonce in, de teng tn du ISIS tn wonder
how in zee Visit jou are guing tu got
out again. Try ct and see. Eff ct
works, dan viggle out, Shoes first, and
get de tools jou forgot to tax Wit jou
de first tam. Don't got mad jet. Wait
tills Jou ar in again scrubbing SCOT
and ashes out off de foos. Only a
mad man can du sush teng. Van
jou ha swallowed all off desc stuff
dat jou can live Wit, sqveese out, tax
smoke or som snooce, and keep vat
jou ar tenking tn joursalf. De fit
teng now ISIS tn assemble de yoints
off de smoke-pipe, first spilling de
SCOT all Offer de easements floor.
Steck de yoints tugedder, dat iss eff
dey var efer meant tn fit tugedder,
and dan stock dem on de exhaust and
de shimney-hole. De naxt teng ISIS tn
call Mama, befoor jou break de whole
works and de Ten Commandments.
Yours trooly,
Axel Peterson.
P. Est.-Van jou buy niew tabak-
pipe remainder dat ct issnot de cost