davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington times., 1923-05-22
Have Smile
With Us
By Nat N. Dorfman.
. ERHAPs they call 'em tin
Lizzles because they're a.
- ways chattering.

ways chattering.
The old.fashioned girl who
used to dream Of the day when
q Prince Charming would snatch
her away on a dashing horse, IL
tickled silly IL the neighbors see
her sweetheart call for her In a
fIivver.
Stars may come and stars may
go, but the movie fan keeps on
going to the theater forever.
An elastic income is something
a husband expects his wife to
make out of the pay envelope
he gives her.
Some people 50 to the summer
hotels in the country to get the
air, and they usually get it. too,
only it's hot.
YES AND NO.
No, Hiawatha, the world isn't
fiat unless you mean fiat broke.
Yes, Eucalyptus, when q man
says he's through with women
it's a sign he's either married or
being sued for breach Of promise.
No, Algernon, we haven't any
royalty in the United States, but
those in Europe give US such
laughs we can't see how we can
compete with them.
Yes, Martha, the Constitution
guarantees every old man life,
liberty and the pursuit. OF happi-
ness az the front row OF every girl
show will convince you.
PHIL OSSIFY SAYS
You can tell it's a late spring
ana still more or less cold because
the women aren't DOMINIC their
furs yet.
Everybody seems anxious to
cancel the debt excepting our
grocer and butcher.
The fellow who would rather be
big fry in a small town than a
small fry in a big town evidently
hasn't the vision to aspire to be
a big fry in big town.
A Socialist is a fellow who's
more than eager to have you share
your earnings with him.
The Washington times., 1923-05-22

An elastic income is something
a husband expects his wife to
make out Of the pay envelope
he gives her.
The Washington times., 1923-05-22

And the hOld.up men would go
to. : and from work on roller
skates.
The Washington times., 1923-05-22

Footprints may be wonderful
means of Identification, but they
don't help the laundries ar
returning the right socks to US.
(copyriRht. 1928. King Features
- Syndicate, Inc
The Washington times., 1923-05-22

Stars may come and stars may
go, but the movie fan keeps on
going to the theater forever.
The Washington times., 1923-05-22

4" ONE scientists claim that
- it's easier to identify Grim
~ inals by impressions of the
toes than it is by finger prints.
Maybe this is true, but very few
burglars open windows with their
feet.
The Washington times., 1923-05-22

Footprints may be damaging
evidence, but not many hOld-up
men walk around town bare
footed.
The Washington times., 1923-05-22

The wife of the average thug
wouldn't let him walk over cob
bic stones and car tracks in his
socks.
The Washington times., 1923-05-22

For a while the police started
Identifying crooks by their foot
prints. One guy was hauled 10
Jail SO often on suspicion, that
every time he met a policeman
heH started taking his shoes and
stockings off.
The Washington times., 1923-05-22

After he opens a safe he goes
to a manicurist and gets his
fingers fixed up, but he doesn't
want to keep running to a CHI
ropodist.
The Washington times., 1923-05-22

A safe blower can find the
combination of any vault with
his fingers, but he'd have a hard
Job finding it with his feet.
The Washington times., 1923-05-22

III they put this system into
force, every burglar in town
would be going around the city
on crutches.
The Washington times., 1923-05-22

Pretty soon he got wise and
saved himself a lot of trouble by
going around in his bare feet.
Putnam patriot., 1923-05-04
EASTFORD

Joseph Gurley is improving in health-
 Willis Hiscock of Union is visiting friends in the Valley.
 Mrs. c. l.. Hall of Rye, N. r., will spend the month of June at the Gen. Lyon Inn.
 Mrs. Hammond from New York. whose husband recently died, Is the guest of Miss Alice R. Rindge.
 Mir. and Mrs. Dwight Lyon and Mrs. Harry Smith of North windham. will soon return from South America,
 Mrs. Lyon received word of an ae- cident in which her nephew, Eugene Jones of Groton, formerly of East. fora. broke his arm while eranking . car.
 A house occupied by Michael Con. upka at Westford Hill and owned by E. Lincoln White of Wilmington Hill was destroyed by fire recently. A large barn which stood some 60 feet away was also consumed by the flames. The furniture in the house and about 20 tons of hay and farming tools and machinery in the barn wer, destroyed. The Conupka family wer, aroused from their sleep by the crack ling of the fire and there was nothinl left but to flee. Mir. White carried some insurance.
Putnam patriot., 1923-05-04
Federated Church Notes

Tine morning services of the Fed erated church were very we'll attend ed in spite of the heavy rains of Safur- day evening. The sermon was on being Called for Purpose" Esther 4:14.
 The Senicr c. E. adjourned it's regular meeting and went to North Ashford to attend the special meet ings just beginning there. Two car loads went, thirteen persons in all. And they were all needed to insure traction in the muddy roads. Yet in spite of the bad roads and the wet weather a very enjoyable time WAS had by all. The Eastford choir sang two anthems, by rec-~st. and had charge of the song service. The Eastfordites are becoming rather proud of the choir, which is gaining considerable local fame.
 The children were notified that a week from next Sunday they would be shown something no one had ever
Putnam patriot., 1923-05-04
HAD DRINK OR TWO.
 DROVE CAR, FINED
Joseph Morin Receives $1O0 Penalty With Costs of
 S16.44

For having driven his automobile while under the influence of liquor, Joseph Morin of this city was fined s100 and costs of s16.44 when ar raigned Monday morning before Judge Geissler in the City Court. Mir. Morin entered plea of guilty to the charge of operating motof vehicle while under the influence of liquor. He was taken into custody Saturday by the police following an accident Saturday. in which the Merlin car was in collision with another machine. Both machines were damaged some what, but no one was injured. Morin secured bail Saturday and was given his liberty.
 Frank Auger, who week ago was before court on the charge of intoxi- cation and was ed on probation at that time, was 1dered to court. Judge Geissler E esed fine of s2O and costs, the i-sters amounting to $i4.49, a total of S34.i9.
 Two other cases, involving local people who were found guilty of drunkenness, were placed on proba- tion.
Putnam patriot., 1923-05-04
Clean Kidneys By Drinking
 Lots of Water
Take salts to Fiush kidnsys h
 Bladder 1othera or i Back Hurts

Eating too much rich food may pro ducc kidney trouble in some form. says a well known authority, because the acids created excite the kidneys Then they become oserworked. get sluggish, clog ID and cause all sorts of distress. particularly baekaohc and misery in the kidney region. rheumatic twinRes, severe headaches, acid stomach. constipation, torpid liser. slcepessncss. bladder and urinary irritation.
 The moment your back hurts or kid- news aren't acting right. or Il bladder bothrtz ,ou. begin drinking lots Of good water md also get about four ounces of lad Salts from any good pharmacy' take a tablespoonful in glass of water. before breakfast for few days and vour kidneys may then act fine. his famous salts is made from the acid ot grape and lemon juice. combined with li,hia. and has been used for years to flush clogged kidneys and stimulate ,hem to activity; also to neutralize the acids in the sestem SO that they 10 longer irritate. thus often relieving blad- der disorders.
 lad Salts can not injure anyones makes a delightful effcrvescruf iitfsia- water drink which millions of men and women take now and tiien to help keep the kidneys and urinary organs clean. thus often avoiding serious kidney dis orders. By all means have your physi- cian examine your kidneys at least twice year.
Putnam patriot., 1923-05-04
ENTERTAIN TODAY
Ponnfres School Children Present Ex.
 ceilent Program Tn Town Hall

Many people were assembled in the town hall at Pomfret this afternoon and greatly enjoyed the program pre- scented in connection with the annual speaking and spelling contest. The contestants and those who gave mu- sical numbers were pupils in the towns schools, their program being as follows:
 Song, When You and I Were Young, Maggie" by grammar grades; selection, Irene Warner, Abingdon Farquhar, Center; singing, Indian songs, by primary children; "The school; "The Inchcape Rock" George Leak in the Dike," Edith Peterson, Chandler; Kinderband, three selec~ tions; The Deacon's Masterpiece, ' Elizabeth Bennett, Elliott; singing, "Song of the Brook" Goodbye, My Lover, Goodbye three-part songs "Horatius at the Bridge" Walter Da- wis, Gary; vocal solo, "The Little Wave" Birch Voorhees,, North: Con tentment," Madeline Anderson, Land ing; singing, Echo Song," by pri- mary children; sGrandmother's Story" Marjorie Fulton, Helen Young, Center; My Fiddle" Bea- trice Sharpe. Priscilla Elicit, Abing- ton; violin solo, Stella Kahaska, Gary: ''How They Brought the Good News, !" Birch Voorhees. North; spelling con- test; song, America.
Putnam patriot., 1923-05-04

West; Tribute to the American Child Eugene Hubbard. English Neighborhood; music, "Morning. . "Vesper Hymn; "The Legend of Bregenz," Rebecca Hubbard. East; se- lection, Ethel Johnson, Chandler: mu- sic, Bright the Moon is Shining. ]. I've a Message; "The Heritage" !" Florence Lyon, Center; "Grandmoth- CTS Story of Bunker Hill" John Nee han, South; "Deacon's Masterpiece. ]" Martha Simpson, Valley; Lady Clare" Ruth Sodergren, Quassett: :: Inchcape Rock" Rachel Todd, North !: 'Lincoln's Second Inaugural Ad- ress," George Williams. Harrisville; 1; music, Drown Your Troubles h a Song; America"
 The first city in Australia to pass the million mark in population is Sydney, New South Wales.
Putnam patriot., 1923-05-04
DR. oLMsTED TO PREACH
To Ofieiase Sunday at St. Philips
 Church and Administer Communion

There is special interest in the morning service to be held at St. Phil ip's church next Sunday. because Rev. Dr. Olmsted, headmaster of Pomfret School, will officiate. Dr. Olmsted will preach and will administer com muniOn.
 The service will be held at 9.45 o. clock, standard time. For those whose clocks now indicate daylight saving time Gone hour ahead of standard time) the hour of this service will be as usual. 10.45 o'clock.
 The Sunday school of St. Philips church has taken on new life and wig or, and is making splendid progress. New classes have been formed, with new teachers in charge of them. The standard Christian Nurture series of lessons are taught and are greatly en- joyed by the children. Next Sunday will mark the opening of the "per- feet attendance" record, which will be kept by means cf . large chart, hung on the wall. The older boys elass has plans for the formation of . base ball team and hopes to be able to get games with other teams of their age, especially Sunday school hines in Put nam and vicinity.
Putnam patriot., 1923-05-04
PUPILS COMPETE TONIGHT
Woodstoek School Children to Take
 Part In Annual Contest

There will be held this evening at Woodstock Academy hall the much anticipated speaking and spelling contest to be competed in by repre- sentatives of all of the schools of the town. There will be large attend anee of parents and friends of the children taking part. The program will be as follows:
 Music, Loves Old Sweet Song": 'killiecranhe," Cedric Child, Elm vale; Opportunity" Reginald Da- Fidson, Red-White; music, by the pri- mary children, "The Bee" "When am big,' "The Little Fiddle"; ."Song of the Camp" Lillian Esterbrook,
Putnam patriot., 1923-05-04

seen before and that something would be done to 1t SO TO one would ever sec it again. It is to be rsed as q part of the regular chiidren's sermon object lesson. Everybody is guessing what 1t may be.
Putnam patriot., 1923-05-04

Odd occupations are followed by students at various universities to pay their way through school. Among them are tuning pianos, watching children while parents are absent. selling salad dressing. house paint ing, grave digging and dance hall bouncer.
Putnam patriot., 1923-05-04

Stickers of animals will adorn the windshields of automobiles entering any of the I2 national parks. These stickers are designed with animals native to each particular park and are issued by the Department of tae in- terior.
Putnam patriot., 1923-05-04

i So far not . brick has been laid toward the restoration of smyrna The great seaport resembles San Francisco after it's earthquake and fire.
El Mundo. [volume] (San Juan, P.R.) 1919-1990, 1923-12-15
1ORQUE IA SAkGRE
BUENA ES ROJA

SPor que Sc viene diciendo que La
eangre buena tiene que ser necesaria-
mente roja2 5ES que el color tiene
que yer algo con la calidad?
Aquf va la explicacion. El oxigeno
contenido en- ell aire es ell gran soste-
nedor de todos los seres animados.
Uno de los trabajos de la asangre es ex-
traer ell oxfgeno que contiene ell aire
durante las frecuentesy continues es-
tancias de este llltimo en- los pulmo-
mes y pasarlo los tejidos del cuerpo.
Cuando la sangre cargada de ox1geno
portadoT de vida, sale del coraz6n
para seguir ell curse de las venas, en-
tonceS eS cuando verdaderamente
ea roia. Mas, al volver al organo de
que origina, cargada de impurezaS Y
privada de Su oXlgeno, tiene un color
oscuro muy pronunciado.
DE 10 antecedente Sc desprende que
para gozar de buena Salud es menester
dos requisites, aire puro y sangre
RIGA y roja,-el aire puro para pro-
porcionar ell oxfgeno, la sangre roja
para llevar ese por todas las venas
del cuerpo. Las PfldoraS Rosadas
del DIR. Williams hacen la sangre rica
y roja, porque ese t6nico aumenta
grandemente su poder de Ilevar oxf-
geno, facilitandola por 10 tanto mucho
mas en- ser portadora de nueva vida
yyigor todos los organos del cuer-
po. Pruebe esas pfldoraS tonicas y
note ell aumento dc color en- las me-
jillaS y labios, observe como sus ner-
Yios Sc vuelven mas sosegados, su
apetito mejora, su digestion mas nor
NAL, su andar mas rapido y Sus males
mas ligeros de sobrellevar.
Tn valioso librito conteniendo con-
seios eSpeciales para la conservation
de la salud, intitulado 'Enfermeda-
des de la Sangre," lie sera remitido
bajo sobre cerrado y completamente
libre de gasto alguno para uSted, 81
10 solicita la DR.. Williams Medi-
cine Co., Departamento NJ, Schenec.
tady, N. Y, e. U. de A..
El Mundo. [volume] (San Juan, P.R.) 1919-1990, 1923-12-15
Ell PULGON AMARILLO (siphs fla
va) SIGUE ATACANDO A LA CANA
UBA EN- CABo RoJO

! En- septiembre 90 del corriente afo,
escribi a la Estaci6n Experimental In
sular de Rio Piedras, informando de
la playa (pulg6n amarillo) que ataca
en- algunos puntos de esta Jurisdiction
a Ia cana UBA.
La contestacion mi consulta, dist
po mi alarma en- aquellos dias. 'sespe-
rando con calma los acontecimientos. "
segun Sc me aconsej6.
Fu6 en- Ia ilegada de los enemigos
naturales del pulgon que, como Sc me
dijo, atacan las numerosas colonias de
este, venciendo la playa.
Pero como va van dos meses largos
y no aparece insecto que destruya ell
chupador de la hoja de la cana Uba y
10 que noto, con alguna sorpresa. es
que ell NAL va creciendo cada dia. doy
este nuevo aviso a Ia Estacion Expert
mental InsuIar para que conozca ell cur
so que va tomando la invasion.
Es mi creencia que ese pulg6n causa
mas daiio la cana Uba. cuando apa-
rece en- sus hojas, que Ell Matizado a
las otras variedades.
Con MATIzADo, por mas grave que
sea la invasion, pueden cortarse en-
cuerda cuatro seis toneladas de ca
fias; y en- area igual de cana Uba, ataca
da por ell pu1gon amarillo en- alto grado
de infection, no Sc corta una tonelada.
Invite quien pretenda rebatirme pa
ra llevarlo sitios donde ha sentado
sus reales ese chupador ALI, sobre
Ell terreno, Ievantar discussion.
Digo mas: la cana enferma de MA
TIzADO Sc corta y da retofos tam
bien enfermos (taIes padres, tales hi
jos) pero, pocas muchas, producer
canas. Y la Uba. chupada SUI savia
por Ell consabido pulg6n, sus hojas re-
secas y la planta sin vida, Sc corta (si
hay algo que cortar porque muchas We
ces pasa de puro fofa un estado in
servible) Y no retofia
Quien quiera convencerse de la YER
dad de 10 que digo, desc un paseito.
hasta mi fnca vera un sitio, aunque
pequeno, donde ell pulg6n Sc present6
con toda severidad en- la cana Uba
Y para veneer ell NAL cort6 toda mata
afectada, las amonton6 y les di fuego.
IHay retofios ALI?
Ninguno.
Ell chupador hizo I'm trabajo tan
''eficaz" que destruy6 por complete
las cepas, no dejandole germenes de
vida nj en- 10 escondido de sus rafces.
Enti6ndase que esos casos graves a
que me refiero, cuando hay la completa
destruction de la cana, Sc hallan donde
donde Ell dafiino insecto ha levantado
como un baluarte inexpugnable sus nu-
merosas colonias.
Hay ataques benignos del pulg6n. de
los que la cana Sc repone en- parte des-
pues de pasada la playa.
Esto ocurre cuando ell chupador Sc
localiza en- I'm punto, no apareciendo
la vez en- distintas parties de la pieza.
Parece que asf, localizado, puede ven
cerlo mejor que disperso su enemigo
El Mundo. [volume] (San Juan, P.R.) 1919-1990, 1923-12-15
ACTOS CIvICOS EN- CABO ROJO
DURANTE LA SEMANA PRO
HARDING

De acuerdo con la proclama del Go
bernador Towner Sc han levado ca
bo en- Cabo Rojo hermosos actos CT
vicos con que Sc propone este pueblo
contribuir durante la semana 'pro-
Harding para la construction del mo-
numento en- honor al ilustre fenecido.
Muy extenso y variado es ell progra-
ma que Sc ha confeccionado sin du-
da alguna que sera un exito debido
a la animation que reina en- todo Ell
pueblo al espiritu de generosidad
que siempre ha sido ell standard de
todos los habitantes.
El Mundo. [volume] (San Juan, P.R.) 1919-1990, 1923-12-15
APACA Y VAMONOS...

natural, iel que tanto tarda en- llegar
por estas campifas rojenas!
No Sc CANA para sustos, podemos de-
cir ahora que nos esta invadiendo el
pulgon.
Ell matizado va pasando de moda y
va su traje veteado 10 viste algune
que otro cohollo de cana, porque la
selection de la semilla Y la extirpaci6n
de 10 planta enferma, tinico remedic
conocido hasta hoy para ese NAL, han
dado los provechosos resultados que Sc
esperaban.
No niego que en- fincas de agricul-
torres inexpertos existira matizado, ha-
llandose la cana enferma en- mayor MI
nero que la buena; pero ESQ no quie-
re decir que ell may no este combatido
es que en- esas plantaciones no han usa-
do, por ignorancia, los medios de selec-
ci6n y extirpaci6n que senale antes.
P6nganlos en- uso veran como la pla-
ga Sc va.
,Esta a1usi6n que hago al matizado,
en- este artieulo dedicado al pulgon de
la cana Uba, es un parentesis que de-
be aceptar ell lector, pues Iquien no Sc
alarma viendo profanada la inmunidad
de la cana Uba por un pulgon majade-
ro. estando tan frescos en- nuestras me-
morias los desastres del matizado?
Tai parece que nos han dado pasa-
porte para que vayamos a los dominios
de Herodes y de estos nos traslademos
los de Pilatos.
El Mundo. [volume] (San Juan, P.R.) 1919-1990, 1923-12-15

Estos puntos suspensivos encierran
los detalles que acaba de referirme don
Miguel A. Perez, inspector municipal
de Pesas Y Medidas de esta poblaci6n,
respecto de los dafios que en- colabora-
ci6n con Ell pulgon est& causando en-
algunas de sus plantaciones de cafia
Uba un gusano como de una pulgada
de largo que aparece en- las hojas de
la planta, devorandolas por complete.
Oportunamente me trasladar6 hasta
los sitios donde Sc desarrolla ese nue.
vo enemigo de los sufridos agriculto-
res.
En- tanto, dejadme que olga:
APAGA Y vANToNos -.
Jose C. MORALES.
cabo ROjo, diciembre 70 de 1928.
El Mundo. [volume] (San Juan, P.R.) 1919-1990, 1923-12-15

Desaparecen todos los sintomas de
tuberculosis en- ell paciente.
El Mundo. [volume] (San Juan, P.R.) 1919-1990, 1923-12-15
OBsERvACIONEs

Reaction
Primeros efectos.
Sin estertor en- ell pulmon. Sin es-
puto. Sin tos. Desde ell de diciem-
bre hasta ell 18 tuvo grippe y per-
dio peso.
Examen del esputo-negativo.
El Mundo. [volume] (San Juan, P.R.) 1919-1990, 1923-12-15
Jose C. MORALES.

cabo Rojo, diciembre 12 de 1928.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-03-01

mother wanted me to take Lydia E. Pinkham's Vegetable Compound. ! took a couple of bottles of it and thought it did not help me as much as it should, so gave it up to try some- thing else. Nothing took helped me much, so 1 finally decided to give the Vegetable Compound another trial and to take enough of it to make sure it would help me. l have taken it over a year now and it has brought wonderful results. 1 have gained from 8 to no pounds and am keeping house now. My friends all notice the change in my health; iwlil be giao a;to 10 to me about the Vegetable Com pound. Mrs. w. c. MoNsoN, 1516 Park Ave. Beloit, Wis:
 Mrs. Monson is willing to write to any woman suffering from such troubles.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-03-01

worked Tn stores and had to do heavier work than my strength could stand, and had to be on my feet most of the time.
 Finally l had to give up this work entirely and stay at home. Doctors medicine did not give me much
 relic f, and my
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-03-01
Mrs. Housekeeper

The servant problem may be easily solved if you will just glance over the Situation Wanted" column day Probably the very helper you seek is today advertising for work. Let help you get in touch with her.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-03-01
fully Classified Ads Today They're Interesting and Profitable
MT. Business Man

Be sure read the Situation Wanted" columns to- day. You can find COMPETENT HELP here-per- haps just the woman you need IS asking for work Give the Job Seeker a chance. Answer the work wanted ads.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-03-01
EMPLOYMENT
HELP wANTED-MALE

WANTED-Experienced lady food checker. 3 experienced white table boys. 30 carpenters. 60c to roc hour. bolermaker helpers.
 Al chef cook, S1Oo, room, board. White waitresses.
 white pantry women, 1855, meals. Boring mill machinist.
 3 all-round machlnsts tno trouble.) Electric overhead cranemsn. : white short order cooks. ? white blacksmiths trailroad) Experienced white boy dairy hand. 2 white boy helpers. S16. room, board. young man farm hand, $S5, room,
 board Young boy. apprentice (shop0 2 white or colored handy men. White and colored coal miners. Colored couple, housework. Colored practical nurse. $15 week. Colcred hotel maid, men cooks. Colored boy and girl dishwashers. Colored waitress. maids. others Producers Agency, 2119ta End Ave. N
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-03-01
FRIENDS N01|CED
 IMPROVEMENT
Wonderful Results from Lydia E. Pinkham's Vege.
 table Compound

Bethel, Wis. My female trouble was brought on by overwork. had
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-03-01

Jacksonville, Fla.-"I have, at different times. found relief by talk ing Dr. Pierce's Favorite Prescrip- tion, when l began to be nervous, had severe headaches, and felt bad in general. Usually two or three bottles was sufficient. also took the Prescription during expect ancy and it was great benefit to me at this time. My experience with different remedies leads me to believe that Dr. Pierce's Favorite Prescription is the very best woman's tonic on the market" ."- Mrs. L. H. Goss, 504 Cherry Ave.
 You can always find this Pre- scription of Dr. Pierce's in your neighborhood drug store in tablets or liquid; or send Ice for trial package and write for free medical advice to Dr. Pierce's Invalids' Hotel in Buffalo, N. Y.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-03-01
CHANDLER
ARREST IN MOVIE CASE

LOS ANGELES, Feb. 2S.-tBy United Press s.)-Charged with offer ing to furnish drugs to alleged ad- diets in the Hollywood movie colony. Guy l.. Rockwell. an attorney, was held by police today. Ericole Ma glicne. alleged to have been go- between for Rockwell. also was ar rested. charged with conspiracy to violate the Harrison narcotic act.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-03-01

WE HAVE an opening for 2 ambitious men with high school education or equiva- lent. Permanent employment with a national company; good pay to begin with and a splendid opportunity for ad- vancement if you mean business. Apply 923 Jeffer- son County Bank Bldg, after Z D. m.