davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Shoshone journal., 1923-12-21
By P. G. WODEHOuSE
Copyright By George H. Doran Co.

i haven't been down at Wlndles
since was a kid"
That's right. l forgot that. Well.
my pater had an orchestrIon put In the
drawing room. One of these automatic
things you switch on, you know. Makes
devil of row. Bennett can't stand
IL, and Mortimer insists on playing II
all day. Well, they hotted up good
ish bit over that"
wen, don't see how all this affects
you. If they want to scrap, why not let
themY'
fes, but, you see, the most frightful
thing has happened. At least. It hasn't
happened yet but It may any day.
Benefits talking about taking legal
advice to see if he can't induce Morti-
fner TO cheese it by law. as he can't be
stopped any other way. And the deuce
OF it is, your father is Benefits legal
representative over in England, and
he's sure to 90 to him."
well, that'll do the pater a bit of
good. Legal fees"
Eustace Hignett waved his arms de-
spairingly at his Cousins Obtuseness.
But don't you see? If Bennett goes
to your father about this blnge, your
father will get onto the fact that Win
dies has been let, and he'll nose about.
and make inquiries, and the first thing
that'll happen will be that mother will
get to hear of it, and then where shall
| be?"
Sam pondered.
"Yes. there's that" he admitted.
"Well, now you see what a hole I'm
in
'Yes, you are. What are you going
to do about itY
you're the only person who can
help me-"
what can | dO?"
why. your father wants you to join
the firm, doesn't he? Well, for goodness
sake, buck up and join it. Don't waste
minute. Dash up to London by the
next train, and sign on. Then, If Ben
nett does blow in for advice, you can
fix it somehow that he sees you instead
of your father and it'll be all right.
You can easily work it, Get the Office
boy or somebody to tell Bennett that
your fathers engaged, but that you are
on the spot He won't mind so long as
he sees somebody in the firm"
But | don't know anything about
+bo Ior,. What chafl COW t0 him 80
That's all right. I've been studying
Shoshone journal., 1923-12-21

II up bit. AS far as can gather, this
legal advice business is quite simple.
ANYTHING that isn't tort is misde-
meanor. You've simply got TO tell old
Bennett that, in your opinion, the whole
thing looks jolly like tort
.What's the word again?"
Tort"
what does ii mean?'
81 don't know. Probably nobody
knows. But it's safe card to play.
Tort. Don't forget it,
Tort. Right ho!'
"Well. then. come along and pack
vour things. There's train to London
in about an hour.
They walked back to the hotel. Sam
p1Ilned once or twice.
"Oh. by the way" he said. "Er-h"w
ls-er-Aiss BennetiT
~ob. she's all right" Eustace Hig-
nert hummed a gay air. Sans reaHy
acouieseence in his scheme had re-
Iiayed his apprehensiye mind.
~Going srrong?' said Sam, afier
pause. -
ON absolutely. We're quite good
friends again now. No use beng 70
the same house and NOT beng "n
soaa,iug terms. ifs rummy how ne
n,ssase Of lime s0r of chnnges y re-
lows poini of view. WY Nhen spF
,old me about her engagement con
,,,,,,,Iated her as cheerfully rs dam.
min, And only q few weeks ago
s,ter engagement " eS9aimed sam
leaplug llke sirl'k'n ,.''
rlier en gug.gug gngemem
no Bream Mortimer sop fl'e,
said Eusiace lilgne'f ISM sH ~
gaeea fo mo- the dpy before ''''''
day
Shoshone journal., 1923-12-21
CHAPT K

At about the time when Sam Mar
lowe was having the momentous inter
view with his father, described in the
last chapter, Mr.. Rufus Bennett woke
from an after-luncheon nap in Mrs.
Hignetts delightful old-world mansion,
Windles, in the county of Hampshire.
He had gone to his room after lunch,
because there seemed nothing else to
do. 1t was still raining hard, so that
a ramble in the picturesque garden was
impossible, and the only alternative TO
sleep. the society of Mr.. Henry Morti-
mer, had been one peculiarly distaste-
ful to Mr.. Bennett.
Much has been written of great
friendships between man and man,
friendships which neither woman can
mar nor death destroy. Rufus Bennett
had always believed that his friendship
for Mr. Mortimer was of this order.
They had been boys together in the
same small town, and had kept to-
gether in after years. They had been
Damon and Pythias. David and iona
l4Adn DuA AEfCl iii uVn Adu OCSA
cooped up together in an English coun-
try house in the middle of a bad patch
of English summer weather. So this
afternoon Mr.. Bennett, in order to
avoid his lifelong friend had gone to
bed
He awoke now with start. and
moment later realized what it was
that had aroused him. There was
music in the air. The room was full Of
it, 1t seemed to be coming up through
the floor and rolling about in chunks
all round his bed. He blinked the last
fragments of sleep out of his system,
and became filed with a restless irrita-
bility.
He rang the bell violently, and pres
emily there entered a grave, thin, intel
lectual man who looked like a duke.
only more respectable. This was Web
ster, Mr.. Benefits English valet
.'Is that Mr.. Mortimer?' he barked.
as the door opened.
mo. sir. 1t is WEBSTER" Not
even the annoyance of being summoned
like this from an absorbing game of
penny nap in the housekeeper's room
had the power to make the valet care
less of his grammar. Il fancied that 1
heard your bell ring. sir"
II wonder you could hear anything
with that Internal noise going on"
snapped Mr.. Bennett. as Mr. Morti-
mer playing that-that id gas-engine
in the drawing roomf"
"Yes. sir. 'Tosti's GOod-by.' A
charming air. sir"
Charming uir be- Tell him TO stop
IT,"
VERY good. sir"
The valet withdrew like a duke leav-
ing The royal presence. not actually
walking backwards. but giving the I'M
preston of doing so. Mr. Bennett lay
ia he'd and fumed. Presently the valet
returned. The music still continued 10
roll about the room.
Il am sorry 10 have 10 inform you.
SIR" said Webster. thar Mr. Mortimer
declines 10 accede 10 your request"
"Oh he said that. did he2"
Shoshone journal., 1923-12-21
THREE MEN ANDAMAID

Yes. sir, very good. Win you go rigfie
In, Mr.. Samuel?"
Sam proceeded to the inner Office,
and found his father debating into the
attentive ear of Miss Milliken, his ell
derly and respectable stenographer, re-
plies to his morning mail.
The CRIME which incrusted the law
yer's professional stamping ground did
not extend to his person. Sir Mallaby
Marlowe was dapper little man, with
round, cheerful face and a bright
eye. His morning coat had been cut by
Londons best tailor, and his trousers
perfectly creased by seduIous valet.
A PINK carnation in his buttonhole
matched his healthy complexion. His
golf handicap was twelve. His sister,
Mrs. Horace Hignett, considered him
worldly.
Good morning father"
"Yery glad to see you're back, Sam.
So you didn't VIM"
NO, l got beaten in the semi-fnals.' .
American amateurs are a very hot
lot: the best ones. l suppose you were
weak on the greens. l warned you
about that.
yes, life Is real, life is earnest" he
said, gazing at sam seriously, and the
grave is not our goal. Lives of great
men all remind US we can make our
lives sublime. In fact, it's time you
took off your coat and started to work. $
Il am quite ready, father"
you didn't hear what | said" ex-
claimed Sir Mallaby w.t. look of sur
prise. Il said it was time you Desan
work"
And | said 1 was quite ready"
BLESS my soul You've changed your
views trifle since | saw you last"
81 have changed them altogether"
Shoshone journal., 1923-12-21
AHER ENGAGEmENTl'

ur,. Horace Hisnett. world
mous writer on theosophy. au
ia0 r of "The Spreading Light"
sIo' .tc arrives in New York on
0,.cturing tour. Eustace. her
I. with her. Windles, ances-
son home of the Hignetts, is his.
her life is largely devoted to
onIne him unmarried. Enter
nenhew, Sam, son OF Sir NAL
Marlowe, the eminent Lon
son lawyer. 1t Is arranged that
ser and Eustace shall sail to-
-ather on the Atlantic the next
ssv Enter Bream Mortimer.
Im.rioan. son Of friend Of an
,.sufserable American named
|pannett. who has been pestering
Mrs. Hignett to lease Windles.
fpream informs her that VIII
hsImina Bennett is waiting for
Eustace at the Little Church
|pound the Corner. Bream him
elf Is in love with Wilheimina.
|Mrs. Hignett marches off to Eus-
|toce's room. The scene shifts to
|tba Atlantic at her pier. Sam.
heading for the gangplank. meets
Il glorious, red headed girl, with
whom he instantly falls in love.
though her dog bites him. Eus-
'tace appears. heart-broken. 1t
|aupears that his mother had
'nninched his trousers" and de-
'layed the ceremony. whereupon
'Wilhelmina had declared the we'd
ding of. Sam Is pushed over
hoard, has a desperate struggle
I'm the water with another swim
mer and rejoins the Atlantic at
|ouarantine. The red-headed girl
Is Wilhelmina Billie"
She halls Sam as a hero and in
Produces Bream. Eustace. poor
sailor, keeps to his berth. He
doesn't know Billie is on board.
sam makes warm love. He pro-
poses and Is accepted. Sam plans
to sing in the ships concert and
forces Eustace to promise to be
his accompanist. Sam blacks up
and is made ridiculous. Eustace
is consoled by Jane Hubbard.
friend of Billie. Sam and Billie
quarrel. Billie breaks their en-
gageraent. Sam, after landing.
goes into mourning.
Shoshone journal., 1923-12-21
cuticura for PImpIy Faces.

To remove pimples and blackheads
smear them with Cuticura Ointment.
Wash off in five minutes with Cuti-
cura Soap and hot water Once clear
keep your skin clear by using them for
daily toilet purposes. Don't fail to in
clude Cuticura Talcum. Advertisement.
Shoshone journal., 1923-12-21

CHAPTER VIIl-Continued
10
You said what?' asked Sam.
n said, 'Hap"
why?"
Because l had an idea. Don't In
rupt, old man. or you'll get me mud
ID. Where was II"
II don't know"
h remember. I'd just got the idea.
Rappened to know, you see, that Ben
h and Mortimer were both fright
BY keen on getting Windles for the
Inner, but my mother wouldn't hear
It and gave them both the miss-in-
L. 1t suddenly occurred to me that
ther was going to be away in Amer
all the summer, so why shouldn't |
Ike a private deal, let them the
pse, and make it stipulation that |
IS to stay there to look after things
ID, to cut long story short, that's
lat did"
You let Windles?"
Yes Old Bennett was down on the
ck at Southampton to meet Wilhel-
na, and | fixed it up with him then
ID there He was so bucked at the
fa Of getting the place that he didn't
ck for a moment at the suggestion
at l should stick at the house. Said
would be delighted TO have me there,
ID wrote out fat check on the spot.
e hired a car and drove straight over
PTS only twenty miles from South
hptOn, you know-and we've been
ere ever since. Bennett sent wire
Mortimer, telling him to join US,
pd he came down next day.
He paused, and looked at Sam as
Tough desiring comment. Sam had
pne to offer.
why do you say you're in hole?'
asked. ut seems TO me as though
Du had done yourself bit of good.
you've got the check, and you're In the
Pore do you want?'
But suppose mother gets to hear
bout it?"
4 'Well?"
/ Shed be sorer than a sunburned
)eck."
Probably. But why should she hear
y itY
An I'm coming to that"
rs there some more of the story7"
4 Quite a lot"
4 Charge on" said Sam. resignedly.
Eustace Hignett fixed despondent
kaze on the shingle. up which the gray
Eaves were crawling with their usual
kugglsh air of wishing themselves
Elsewhere. A rain drop fell down the
pack OF his neck, but he did not notice
H.
II was the weather that really start
Fd IT, he said.
Started whaf7,
The trouble. What sort Of weather
pave you been having here7"
J haven't noticsd.'
Well, down at Windles IL has been
'ening practically all the time ona
'''f about couple OF days u became
."rly clear 10 me thai Bennett ano
'''1lner were getting a BIZ fed. J
s'''n 70 say having spent all upeif
~ 20 America, douf you know ths}
s'''n used 20 country where y
'"Neo nil the ume and pretty soon u
'"F'N io Rel 90 their nerves. ine}
,"',i qperrellng Nothing bad ~
~" pn hoillng np mofe and ploge, ii'l
'na' nney He,p hardly ~ speaking
'fNl l'vy llllls lnlng ihai hap
Nt' h'fped "a Hei ihf sins w illrnp
., l'ti va 'bai huslness NJ sNllp' ~
'NslHn0fH
hN4a fpllhY
'lNff NNlidag Dla itNneli n
|'' NJ N'ln aif Nnnls nlW hfW "
n, H'lff hpl Nnl|Nfl lAN|sis M lA
Il N'N iNalN about ~ hpNaN NNl
al' HiNpIta geNNlHl M HhNW
.a N lhlH ibln va ~ Wfl'H
"NF ftN ifNfmhN ~ 4rl1hli'NNl
Shoshone journal., 1923-12-21
DEMAND "BAYER" ASPIRIN
Take Tablets Without Fear if You
See the Safety "Bayer Cross"

Warningl Unless you see the name
"Bayer" on package or on tablets you
are not getting the genuine Bayer
Aspirin proved safe by millions and
prescribed by physicians for % years.
Say 'Bayer" when you buy Aspirin.
limitations may prove dangerous.-Adv.
Shoshone journal., 1923-12-21

Having hfcume Hfu'Dfd from iis
foundations. 0nr ~ flle bfNad s'i'itf
~ Ajoapi Dglnsuef near i'liftf'
Fganee, s rcpprled ~ pass mNed q
dlsiauof ~ Htullg . auagiff ri y n'ir
"a falrled NliN a iuf snll pfadNhf'
and enoas and eolflfi up ln lir pnf
ssf rlpis sni pflsls inei slNpi lp
Nf nai "A rNoanui slpff vNif'fi
NJ ifa Ali'NW ala9pHs anf HNlAi'w
HNAsf lW HHnl sNai l4sfi NeN
NNNH ni ll0 summing NJ lNf aHllf
Ir 1900 NNe N4f NN FH lN H'HN
NI 500 NMW aYNt4 ff y Nsl
MY y NNNlHus
Shoshone journal., 1923-12-21
Physical Culture.

Howell-"Was ROwell alive when
they found him in the well?' Powell
Yes, it was a case of deep breath
ing"
Shoshone journal., 1923-12-21
ALWAYS Keep a Box on Hand.

Brandreth Pills are safe and reli-
able laxative, made in America for
ninety years, entirely vegetable.-Adv.
Shoshone journal., 1923-12-21
M0THERI GIVE SICK BABY
"CALIF0RNIh FIG SYRUP"
Harmless Laxative 60 Clean Liver
and Bowels of Baby or Child

Even constipat-
ed, bilious, fever
ish, or sick, collie
Babies and Chill
dren love to take
genuine "Califor-
MIA Fig Syrup"
No other laxative
regulates the ten
der little bowels
so nicely. 1t
Shoshone journal., 1923-12-21

stomach and starts the liver and
bowels acting without gripping. Con-
tains no narcotics or soothing drugs
Say "Califcrnia" to your druggist and
avoid counterfeits! Insist upon gen
uine California Fig Syrup" which
contains Observation-Disclosures
Shoshone journal., 1923-12-21
Should Say So.

Sue-When Paul kissed me good
night, he kissed me on the ear.
Lu-Gee, you sure can dodgel
Shoshone journal., 1923-12-21
"DANDELION BUTTER COLOR"

A harmless vegetable butter color
used by millions for 80 years. Drug
stores and general stores sell bottles
of "Dandelion" for 80 eents.-Adv.
Shoshone journal., 1923-12-21
"CASCARETS" FOR LIVER
AND B0WELS-10c A BOX

Cures Biliousness, Constipation, Sick
Headache, Indigestion. Drug stores. Adv
Shoshone journal., 1923-12-21

Nothing pays larger dividends than IA
little common sense.
Shoshone journal., 1923-12-21
A Universal Remedy for Pair

For over 10 years Allcock's Plaster has
been a standard external remedy, sold in
all parts of the civilized world.-Adv.
Shoshone journal., 1923-12-21
Saves Money

Lida-What cigarettes dc you smoke
Letty-My husbands.
Shoshone journal., 1923-12-21

Darkness is an absence of light;
cold is an absence of heat, and funk
ing is an absence of mind
Shoshone journal., 1923-12-21
Biz Line to Buck.

In combating overweight, one should
realize that he may have whole gem
erations of fat ancestors to buck
against.
Shoshone journal., 1923-12-21
All Arranded.

she-Oh, I wish the Lord had made
me a mani
Shoshone journal., 1923-12-21
To Identify Them

Easy way to remember peoples
names and faces. Pretend TO yourself
that they all owe you money.
Shoshone journal., 1923-12-21

billie. ! want you 70 60 70
London and see Sr haiiaby
MaTlows'
The Holly chieftain., 1923-06-21

butter and spread 1t over the potato
mixture Cook on the stove to brown.
then place moment In the oven.
Tutti.Frutti cheese.-To one pack.
age of cream cheese add one-half cup
full Of sweet cream; chop six candied
cherries, one canned apricot, strip Of
citron, one dozen seeded ralsins; mix
with the. cheese; add one teaspoonful
each Of nutmeg, grated lemon peel and
sugar, and small piece of candIed
pineapple, chopped. Mold in shall
low pan and cut in squares to serve
with buttered toast for afternoon tea.
Marshmallow Dessert.-Whip one
cupful of heavy cream; add ione-half
cupful Of f1nely-cut pineapple and
dozen marshmallows, cut into quarters.
Chill and serve with a spoonful of
maraschino cherries with sirup over
each.
Sweet potatoes, French fried, are de-
licious; sprinkle with a little sugar
and serve hot.
Macaroon Wafers.-Cream onehalf
cupful of butter; add one cupful of
sugar gradually, the yolks Of three
eggs and the white Of one, four table
spoonfuls Of cold water, one teaspoon
full Of baking powder, two teaspoonfuls
of vanilla and flour enough to roll.
Place on ice to stiffen, and they may
be rolled with little flour. To the other
two whites add sugar and put>a tea
spoonful Of frosting on each macaroon.
Pineapple FIum.-Beat the whites
Of three eggs until stiff, add three
tablespoonfuls Of sugar and four ta-
blespoonfuls of grated pineapple; mix
together. Butter cups slightly, fill
gently and set into hot water to bake
light brown. Turn out and serve
with whipped cream; garnlsh with
bits of preserved pineapple or with
maraschino cherries.
The Holly chieftain., 1923-06-21
SAVE TIME FINDING CLOTHES
Housekeeper- Must Evolve Her Own
System for Storage Of Wearing
Apparel Of Family.
8 tablespoonfuls flour.
u teaspoonful celery salt
Y teaspoonful pepper.
N teaspoonfuls salt.

II individual boxes are used from
year to year to put clothes away In,
there may be kept in or near each one
a small roll of mending pieces belong
Ing to the person whose clothes are in
the box. II the scraps left over when
q dress is cut out are stored in the
right place at the time of cutting,S
patching or remodeling pieces may
be found In jiffy.
Millinery trimmings (feathers, rib
bons. flowers, velvet pieces) should be
stored, II in good condition, in box
by themselves, where they can be
easily found If hat must be une1-
pectedly freshened. Laces Of different
kinds can be wound on cards or other
wise put away, 80 that a glance will
make the right piece accessible. Lin
ing materials and old dress founda-
tions which have further uses are
best collected by themselves. Each
hOusekeeper must evolve her own sys-
TEN but If she aims to arrange the
family clothing and materials In stor-
age SO that everything is readily found
when wanted she serves the double
purpose of saving much time and keep
ing the storage room in good order,
says the United States Department Of
Agriculture.
The Holly chieftain., 1923-06-21
HOW CREOLE EGGS ARE MADE
Melted Butter, Chopped ONIONS, To
matoss and Green Peppers Are
Among ingredients.

The United States Department Of
Agriculture gives the following direc-
tions for making "creole eggs from
six hard-boiled eggs, previously ready.
Cook one-half cupful of washed rice
In two quarts Of boiling water con-
taining one teaspoonful Of salt.
2. Make sauce In the following way:
Melt two tablespoonfuls of butter in
skillet, and add four tablespoonful of
chopped onions. Cook until the onion
is soft, but not brown. Add one and
one half cupfuls Of canned tomatoes
and two finely chopped green peppers,
ane one-half teaspoonful of salt. Cook
for fifteen minutes. Place layer Of
boiled rice in a baking dish, cover
with slices Of hard-cooked eggs and
cover the sliced eggs with creole
sauce. Repeat until baking dish is
full. Crate cheese over the top and
bake for twenty minutes in a moder-
ate oven.
The Holly chieftain., 1923-06-21
HOW TO CLEAN TIN UTENSILS
Vessels Should Be Washed Thoroughly
In Hot, soapy Water and Then
Dried Thoroughly.

For ordinary care, tin utensils should
be washed In hot soapy water, rlnsed
in hot clear water, and dried thorough
ly, according to the United States De-
partment Of Agriculture. A tin uten-
sill that has food dried on 1t should
be covered with weak soda solution
heated for few minutes, and then
washed. Scraping scratches tin and
may expose the iron or steel surface
underneath, which may rust. Tin
dnrkens with use, and this tarnish pro-
tects the tin; therefore tin utensils
should not be secured simply for the
sake of making them briaht
The Holly chieftain., 1923-06-21
SELECTING FLY BAIT
OF BIG IMPORTANCE
Largely Fermentation Which
Renders Material Attractive
to Household Pests.
prepared by the United States Department
CT Agriculture)

prepared by the United States Department
Of Agriculture)
The problem Of selecting the best
bait for flies is an important one. In
choosing bait 1t should be remem-
bered, says. the United States Depart
ment Of Agriculture, that it Is largely
the fermentation which renders the ma
ter1al attractive, and that bats are
most attractive during their most
active period Of fermentation. The
kind of bait used should be governed
by the species Of flies the destruction
Of which Is desired. This is most often
the house fly.
A mixture Of cheap cane molasses
("black strap") and water is one Of the
most economical and effective bats
for the house fly. One part molasses is
mixed with three parts water. The at
tractiveness becomes marked on the
second or third day.
Sugar-beet or "stock molasses,"
which is very cheap In regions where
produced. when mixed In the foregoing
proportions. is fairly attractive.
Sirup made by dissolving one part
Of ordinary brown sugar in four parts
of water and allowing the mixture to
stapd day or two to induce fermen-
tation is almost equal to molasses and
water as fly bait. II 1t Is desirable
to use the sirup Immediately after max
Ing 1t, a small amount Of vinegar
should be added. Honeybees are
sometimes caught In large numbers by
this bait. When this happens some Of
the other bats recommended should be
used. On dairy farms probably milk
is next choice as bait to cane-molas-
ses solution, considering its conven-
ience. The curd from milk with about
one-half pound Of brown sugar added
to each pound, and water to make 1t
thoroughly moist, is a very good bait
and continues to be attractive for ten
days or longer II kept moist. A mash
Of bran made quite thin with mix
ture Of equal parts Of water and milk
and with few tablespoonfuls of
brown sugar and cornstarch and a
yeast cake added makes an attractive
and lasting bait. The foregoing bats
are rendered more attractive by STIR
ring occasionally.
Certain other mixtures may also be
utilized. A packing-house product
known. as blood tankage, with molasses
and water. is good bait to use where
both blowflies and house flies are
abundant.
The size Of the bait container in rela-
ton to the size Of the trap Is a very
important consideration. 1t has been
found that small pan or deep pan
Of bait set In the center under trap
will catch only small fraction Of the
number Of flies secured by using larger,
shallow containers. The best and most
convenient pan for bait is a shallow
circular tin, such as the cover Of lard
bucket. For liquid bats the catch
can be Increased slightly by placing
piece of sponge or few chips In the
center Of the bait pan to provide addi-
tional surface upon which the files may
alight.
The Holly chieftain., 1923-06-21
M2NHNNM q
g QuHGUn1C

Soft-bolled eggs are more easily d.
gested than fried.
A solled leather pocketbook may be
cleaned with sponge dipped in gaso-
line.
Stuff pitted prunes with grated
cheese, peanuts or walnuts and roll in
powdered sugar.
Mince cold chicken, cook with lemon
juice, cayenne, salt and chopped olives,
Use as sandwich paste.
A bolt of cheap lace will not be one
half as effective as yard or two Of
really good lace on frock.
Matted milk should be served in tall
glasses, never In cups. 1t is not suit.
able to serve for the afternoon tea.
II canned fruit is to be used for
shortcake 1t should be carefully
drained and cut in pieces. Use the
sirup as foundation for the sauce.
To clean silver knives, forks or
spoons place the silver in basin and
then cover with milk. Boil for three
minutes. rinse in hot water and dry.