davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Ely miner. [volume] (Ely, Minn.) 1895-1986, 1923-06-29

Hello folks, every man should
keep a fair-sized cemetery to bury
the faults of his friends.
The Ely miner. [volume] (Ely, Minn.) 1895-1986, 1923-06-29

Hello neighbors, for team work
the cigarette stub and the waste
basket has any other combination
beaten off the map.
"Doc Smart has a new dishpan
at his house, it's a pithy bit of
news from Kandiyohi county ex-
change. Bob used the one that
was in service to give his bull pup
bath in-why say more?"
A man may carry a spare tire
and still have no tire to spare.
o.
The average husband is either in
bed or in bad at eleven P. M.
The reason bachelors live longer
is because no gentle tyrant requires
them to take something when they
feel a little out of sorts.
Modern women may admire these
Egyptian styles of costume, but the
mummies themselves were all wrap
ped up in them.
except a large inheritance.
We read that in st. Petersburg
Fla. the other day thief stole a
bathtub. We have often heard of
a person taking bath, but seldom
of anyone taking bathtub.
Luke thinks that another unequal
tax is having to pay all kinds of
congressman the same salary.
o
When picking your friends be
careful and don't pick them toe
much.
The boy with the dirty hands and
ears may be your state health offic.
er some day.
"Just charge it." said the sweet
young thing when she left her stor-
age battery at the garage.
o.
A hick town is place where the
neighbors know something is wrong
when your lights burn after 1C
o'clock.
Many people take dope for what
they think ails them when all they
need is long walk.
A fellow who has worked out in
the open all day doesn't nave to
have any magazine article to tel
him how to go to sleep.
Household Hints.
The smell of onions may be taken
from the breath by chewing a little
garlic.
Flour added to dough will be
found to make bread much more
palatable
Carpets can be held tight to the
floor by the use of spikes.
If the banging of doors bothers
you, the annoyance can be obyiated
by using the windows.
Rockefeller says save it and Ford
says spend it. Perhaps it is a
fifty-ffty policy that keeps US all
poor.
Luke would like to know if boot
leggers hold rummage sales.
o.
Richard, come back. Return to
your wife and family. The phono-
graph has been sold.
A little thing like the truth does
not disturb some people when they
are trying to produce an argument.
In this old world you'll find
A lot of honest fellows
Who think it is no crime
To walk off with umbrellas.
Luke tells US that Adam was a
The Ely miner. [volume] (Ely, Minn.) 1895-1986, 1923-06-29

Luke tells US that Adam was a
man who had trouble with one of
his ribs.
The Ely miner. [volume] (Ely, Minn.) 1895-1986, 1923-06-29

A groceryman ought to be able
to select a good date.
The Ely miner. [volume] (Ely, Minn.) 1895-1986, 1923-06-29

A man may carry spare tire
and still have no tire to spare.
The Ely miner. [volume] (Ely, Minn.) 1895-1986, 1923-06-29

Modern women may admire these
Egyptian styles of costume, but the
mummies themselves were all wrap
ped up in them.
The Ely miner. [volume] (Ely, Minn.) 1895-1986, 1923-06-29

Nothing succeeds like success
except a large inheritance.
The Ely miner. [volume] (Ely, Minn.) 1895-1986, 1923-06-29

Each nation, it appears, trusts in
God. Now all that is needed for
them to trust in one another.
The Ely miner. [volume] (Ely, Minn.) 1895-1986, 1923-06-29

Luke thinks that another unequal
tax is having to pay all kinds of
congressman the same salary.
The Ely miner. [volume] (Ely, Minn.) 1895-1986, 1923-06-29

Luke says an optimist is the dent
list who says that he is going TO try
and do his best not to hurt you.
And the ist?-Oh! That's you.
The Ely miner. [volume] (Ely, Minn.) 1895-1986, 1923-06-29

In this old world you'll find
A lot of honest fellows
Who think it is no crime
To walk off with umbrellas.
The Ely miner. [volume] (Ely, Minn.) 1895-1986, 1923-06-29

A Kansas woman shot her hus-
band whom she mistook for mule.
A perfectly natural mistake. Won
der more of them don't.
The Ely miner. [volume] (Ely, Minn.) 1895-1986, 1923-06-29

A New York juror says he spurn-
ed an offer of a thousand dollar
bride. Folks may knock the big
town, but it contains few pikers.
The Ely miner. [volume] (Ely, Minn.) 1895-1986, 1923-06-29

The reason bachelors live longer
is because no gentle tyrant requires
them to take something when they
feel little out of sorts.
The Ely miner. [volume] (Ely, Minn.) 1895-1986, 1923-06-29

"Man is like tack, thinks Luke
The Ely miner. [volume] (Ely, Minn.) 1895-1986, 1923-06-29

We read that in st. Petersburg,
Fla. the other day a thief stole a
bathtub. We have often heard of
a person taking a bath, but seldom
of anyone taking a bathtub.
The Ely miner. [volume] (Ely, Minn.) 1895-1986, 1923-06-29

The average husband is either in
bed or in bad at eleven P. M.
The Ely miner. [volume] (Ely, Minn.) 1895-1986, 1923-06-29

A little thing like the truth does
not disturb some people when they
are trying to produce an argument.
The Ely miner. [volume] (Ely, Minn.) 1895-1986, 1923-06-29

Hello neighbors, for team work
the cigarette stub and the waste
basket has any other combination
beaten off the map.
The Ely miner. [volume] (Ely, Minn.) 1895-1986, 1923-06-29

When picking your friends be
careful and don't pick them too
much.
The Ely miner. [volume] (Ely, Minn.) 1895-1986, 1923-06-29

"Doc Smart has a new dishpan
at his house, it's pithy bit of
news from a Kandiyohi county ex-
change. Bob used the one that
was in service to give his bull pup
a bath in-why say more?"
The Ely miner. [volume] (Ely, Minn.) 1895-1986, 1923-06-29

Some people can't seem to UNDER
stand why Col. Harvey has no. let
his whiskers grow. King George
wears a beard.
The Ely miner. [volume] (Ely, Minn.) 1895-1986, 1923-06-29

WALT MASON Says: "Oh, every
fly that skips our swatters will have
5.0O0,0OO sons and daughters and
countless first and second cousins
OF aunts and uncles, scores and
dozens, and fifty billion nieces-
So KNOCK the blamed thing all to
pieces" And isn't it the truth?
All together, swat, Swat, SWAT!
The Ely miner. [volume] (Ely, Minn.) 1895-1986, 1923-06-29

The boy with the dirty hands and
ears may be your state health offic
er some day.
The Ely miner. [volume] (Ely, Minn.) 1895-1986, 1923-06-29

"Just charge it," said the sweet
young thing when she left her stor-
age battery at the garage.
Evening star., 1923-09-23

permitted to move under such care
full regulation at d speed that will
give reasonable safety to the public
and at the same time keep the traffic
flowing freely,
Heavy cargo carrying trucks which
impede the flow of traffic contribute
largely to accidents. If in large COM
munities such vehicles were operated
only between midnight and am.
they would be able TO do their work
more efficiently and expeditiously and
without impeding the movement OF
passenger vehicles. Such a
plan would, If adopted, Immediately
prevent large proportion or street
casualties.
"This radical change in motor truck
operation need not be obnoxious to
the general public from a standpoint
of Unusual noise at night. City regu-
lations should prohibit the sounding
of sirens or horns of these vehicles
during the hourse prescribed. In
asmuch as very few pedestrians are
on the streets during these hours. the
sounding of horns would not be neceS-
sary for their safety.
More Fairgrounds are essential to
keep the children safe in large SOM
munities: Fairgrounds should be
made attractive and so regulated and
cared for that parents will not object
to sending their children to these
spaces"
Five specific suggestions were rec
commended by Harold S. Buttenheim.
editor of the American City Maga-
zine:
81. Effective coming ordinance.
70. Widening narrow streets.
't3. Stricter time limits on parking
of automobiles.
"a. Standardization of mechanical
devices for traffic regulation.
Is. Efficient organization of Off
rail moYement of freight"
I'VE have an aHti-parking ordi-
Evening star., 1923-09-23
Where Are We2
Listening

One of the most unsatisfactory
things in touring is to pass through
town after town without knowing
their names. Where are we?" you
ask. searching the scenery for clue
as to your whereabouts. But hanged
if you can tell. You are travelling
with an out-of-date route card, and
you probably wouldn't have gotten
the towns straight even if you had
tried to take them in order.
why don't these modest, retiring
towns advertise a bit? This is Slick
VILE" has greeted many puzzled
motorist, but when you come to study
the situation carefully such enter
prising towns are few and far be-
tween. In most localities the motor
ist has to stop and ask a native for
the necessary information.
Occasionally a store VIII be enter
prising enough to announce the name
of the town. and If your eyes are alb
decipher the weatherWorn shingle
hanging above the door of the post
office. With these two possible ex-
ceptions every town is just like the
one before TO the man who is travel
ing, and it isn't good business for
the towns.
Neatly painted signs welcoming the
motorist and asking him to boost the
town by driving carefully are excel
lent advertising. The cost is nomi-
nal. It's 4 good plan for the motorist
to suggest the idea to townspeople
when stopping off for information.
The chances are that when he passes
through next sea son Il bright, new
sign will greet his eyes.
Evening star., 1923-09-23

the street cars, the elevated lines or
other means of public utility trans
portation, and not unnecessarily con-
gest conditions in the downtown sec
tions by requiring space to park their
cars at their business.
by refusing space on the streets
for the parking of cars, you allow
business to continue uninterruptedly,
and you benefit the many and dis
commode very few. You will thus
have more space to drive cars. and
the owner of a car will find il in
cumbent upon him to find a place to
park his car whether it be in a
garage or a public parking space"
Stanley w. Ray. commissioner of
public safety, New Orleans, advocat ted
simpler and more natural" regula-
tions, rather than ''stricter" regula-
tions, and suggested the construction
of centrally located garages by de-
partment stores and office buildings
as the ultimate solution of the park
ing problem. He also expressed the
opinion that one-wAy streets will
have to be adopted universally in all
cities for thoroughfares less than
sixty feet in width. Mr.. Ray believes
in the rotary theory of traffic and had
a complete remodeling of street car
systems to relieve traffic conditions in
city streets.
Restriction of the height of build
lngs was recommended by Lawson
Evening star., 1923-09-23
EXPERTS SHARPEN WITS,
ITO SOLVE INCREASING
TRAFFIC PROBLEMS
CONTINUED from Fifth Page.a

has suggested program embracing
the following points:
/. More Fairgrounds.
.. Stricter regulations and more
scientific study of safety provisions.
3. New boulevards.
4. Detours for through traffic
5. Parking spaces in Easements of
office buildings
s. Use of open iuts for parking.
From Mayor j. Hampton Moore of
Philadelphia came the following
comment:
I'm cities like. Boston and Philadel-
phia, where motor traffic is piled UP
enormously, one solution would be to
widen streets; but mat is too expen-
sive proposition for immediate ac-
ceptation On a comprehensive scale.
The automobiles have increased too
rapidly for the older cities, where
real estate values make the acquisi-
ton of properties for street WIDEN
ing almost prohibitive. The expe-
rience of the older cities, however,
should serve as lesson and a warn
ing to newer cities awaiting develop
ment.
Need for Fairgrounds.
Distribution of population is also
important, but that involves business
distribution, which in older cities is
likewise a difficult problem. Regu-
lation of parking, the acquisition of
garages and the setting up of park
ing spaces would all aid in the solu-
tion of this new and important prob
lem
George Gordon Battle of New York,
Evening star., 1923-09-23

noted lawyer and orator, summarized
his views as follows:
AS president of the Parks and
Fairgrounds Association / have been
Tor many years deeply interested in
providing greater playground facili-
ties for children in this crowded CEN
ter OF population. There is no doubt
tnat III more Fairgrounds were pro-
v1ded there would be less children on
the street and consequently less dam
ger from traffic accidents. q
Furthermore, / am inclined to
think that there should be further
restriction of horse-drawn traffic In
many of our crowded streets / be-
lieve that vehicles drawn by horses
should be prohibited except during
the less busy hours.
Also marking of crossings will
DO much to make our streets safer.
In this direction the education of our
citizens in the direction of using
greater care in the streets will be of
great benefit. There has been, as you
know, a campaign in that direction
recently In New York, which has
proved to be very helpful"
Controlling Trucks.
Barron Collier. special deputy COM
missioner of the New York police de-
partment, offered these suggestions:
THE rapidly increasing number of
motor vehicles in large cities makes
il necessary that steps be taken to
develop methods for controlling both
pedestrians and vehicles The prob
lem must be worked out, in such a
way as to not only safeguard pedes-
trians, but permit the uninterrupted
flow of traffic and the avoidance of
congestion
Pedestrians. therefore, should be
so regulated that they will cross
streets only at designated crossings.
With these crossing protected on
main thoroughfares, traffic should be
Evening star., 1923-09-23

nance effective from am. to 10
am. and from 4 pm. to Z pm. in the
business section. which prohibits
automobiles parking anywhere on
tn . public streets. Other hours of
the day. between am. and p-rn..
they are allowed thirty minutes
Some streets are paved better than
others, and. of course, the well paved
streets always draw the travel If
all streets were put in perfect condi-
tion, then traffic would be evenly dis
tributed -
~ do not believe that Ii Is the duty
of the city to furnish parking space
for any one, especially during the
business hours of the day. Automo-
biles are becoming so numerous that
if you attempted to furnish this serv-
ice our streets would be completely
jammed and our business strangled
Amy open space that can be used
for the parking of cars, of course. is
beneficial and Is a solution of diff
Guilty for the car owner. Many own
ers of cars use them to travel to and
from their places of business, and
feel that they have a right to leave
them parked somewhere on the
streets. interfering with travel all
day long, until they are ready to re-
turn home at night.
Persons of this class should use
Evening star., 1923-09-23
EDITED BY WILLIAM ULLMAN

chology to me, and commenced won
derin whether it wouldn't work out
In drivfn' up hill and down with g
car 1t occurred to me Immediately
that if more drivers would go into
second when goin' down hill (the
way they go up a steep hill)\ there
would be fewer accidents and less
need for refining brakes.
"As for going up hill, just step or
the gas as il you intended rushin
down hill. Most drivers unintention
ally do their speedin down hill, be-
cause they think they can't help it
Uphill they crawl the way they
should do down hill Reverse the
process.
speed uphill is not only practical
and convenient. but safe. A car goin
thirty five miles up hill can be stop
ped quicker than a car going twenty
on the level. And you don't have to
run risks passin cars either. just
take it easy on the approach until the
folks who struggle with hills are out
of your way. Then hit your high note
the way you used to rush down hill"
Evening star., 1923-09-23
Using Rear Signals.

: If you have installed stop-light
rear signaling device, make an effort
The effectiveness of such device is
in the care it receives and in the way
it is used.
Have it adjusted so that the signal
does not flash until the brake pedal
is about half way down. This elimi-
mated much of the unnecessary flash
ing when you are merely keeping the
car under control by applying the
brakes slightly.
Be sure to take current from the
ammeter rather than direct from the
battery or the starter circuit. which
is not connected with the ammeter.
If the connection is made at the am
meter the Indicator will flicker each
Evening star., 1923-09-23

time the signal is operated, showing
you that 1t is in operation.
If your switch does not already
have it, insert small coil spring be-
tween the switch and the end of the
pull wire which is attached to the
brake rod With this spring inserted
the changing position of the pedal
due to wear of the brakes will~not
necessitate changing the switch ad-
justment
Evening star., 1923-09-23
The Old Mechanic SAYS:

Ever SINCE my oldest daughter
started in takin' singin' lessons I've
had a thought for the folks who drive
cars. There are any amount of
points to be picked up from other
lines, but this is about the best I've
found
When my daughter aims for a
high note her teacher tells her to go
at it as though she hoped to hit a
low one. When you're after a low
note he says, make believe you're
amin for high oGe.'
That sounded IKE practical psv-
Evening star., 1923-09-23

Purdy OF New York, noted authority
on city planning, as the most impor-
tant remedy for the present yitua-
ton, He said:
III no building is higher than the
width of the space on which n fronts
and has an open space in the rear on
Its own lot of one-half it's height I'VE
snail come somewhere near eliminat-
ing congestion. The rule in paris ss
to height is very nearly what I sug
sest' aIthough Paris has not the open
space to the rear that / recommand
In spite of this Paris is congested :"
Evening star., 1923-09-23

Woman students of automobile
driving should endeavOr to remember
that the first rule of learning IN
listening.
The McCarthy weekly news., 1923-05-05
LEGAL ADVERTISING

Department of the Interior US. Land Office at Juneau, Alaska April 2l, 1923.
 NOTICE is hereby given that Matilda F. Roberts, of Mccarthy, Alaska, who, on April 21, 1929, made homestead entry, No. O4176, for NEN, FEN WA, lot 1, Section 17, Township 5 S, Range IA E, Copper River Merid- ian, has filed notice of intention to make final three year Proof. to establish claim to the land above described, be- fore William D. Coppernoll, at Nc Carthy, Alasks, on the 9th day of June, 1923.
 Claimant names as witnesses: Wm. Godfrey, of Kennecot, Alaska Charlie Kello, of Kennecott, Alaska R.L.H. Marshall, of Mccarthy, Alaska Nils Tjosevig. of Mccarthy, Alaska
 Frank A. Boyle
 Register. Date of first publication April, 28, date of disqualification May 26, 1923
The McCarthy weekly news., 1923-05-05

The stage driver fraternity are in tending to get subscription to help knock the humps off the road lead ing to Kennecott. The idea seems to be good one and we hope it succeeds we'll enough to enable rapid transit of passengers,to and from Kennecott.
The McCarthy weekly news., 1923-05-05
The Wary Lover

The city papers had just arri- ved in the village and group ot rustics were gathered in the pos office discussing a sensational divorce case.
 rThe hull trouble is these here nasty marriages orated one. These folks is in too much of hurry to marry. Why, these here hadn't known each other more than seven years before they up and went to see parson. Wasn't hardly acquainted, you might say When couple is courting they can't be too careful. Now, me, I courted old man Hendricks dau- ghter matter of sixteen years.
 You were certainly careful" Page 4 Col 1
The McCarthy weekly news., 1923-05-05

coal mines the mining industry of the section is not especially active. and as to farming, there has not been such a startling amount of advancement made in the potato belt in the Matanuska Valley since the railroad came several years ago. Naturally the section tapped by the Alaska Railroad has some good looking prospects, but so have other parts of the territory.
 It seems too bad, that some rich sec. tions should face a possible period of retrogression while another forees a. head. Colonel Steese IS the man to be in charge of the railroad, but is he or anyone else free to handle the two Commissions, in the manner best calcu- loted to advance the transportation ystem over the entire Territory?
The McCarthy weekly news., 1923-05-05
LETS CLEAN UP!

Several people have cleaned up in front of the houses and the rest of the town looks all the worse. We sug- gest that all those who haven't cleaned up (this includes us) would do we'll to take little outdoor exarcise.
 Even though we don't expect the President or any speechmakers from over Washington way to drop in on
The McCarthy weekly news., 1923-05-05

Entered as second class matter. Septem Der 17th, 1918. at the Eost Office, at Mccarthy. Alaska. under the Act of March 3. lST9
The McCarthy weekly news., 1923-05-05

us for a talkfest, we never can tell a bout when a committee from the city of gestures might drop in, to investi- gate something or another.
 Anyway what's the use of having a rake if you don't use it?
The McCarthy weekly news., 1923-05-05
THIS AND THAT

Granny Oh, conductor, please stop the train; I dropped my wig out of the window.
 Conductor Never mind, lady, there is a switch just this side of the next station.
The McCarthy weekly news., 1923-05-05

Teacher discussing poets, = What do you know about Field ing George?
 George Just waking upE Not much, I've always played short. stop on the baseball team.
The McCarthy weekly news., 1923-05-05
WHAT ABOUT THE REST OF
 ALASKA?

ALAOhA.
 In addresses to various Chambers of Commerce, Colonel Steese made the statement that the Road and Eng ineering Commissions would carry on their work separately; despite the fact they are interlocking. He has also i'm e piled that there would be no favortism shown the districts adjacent the rail road, when wagon roads and trails were being taken under consideration.
 Colonel Steese has been given the task of making a $5O,OOO, UOO invest ment pay for itself and everyone wishes him success, but the fact re mains that the Colonel is only human and that he will try to make the pro- ject pay as easily as he can. A little favoritism shown now and then is to be expected, but use might eventually lead to abuse, and then we will see one section of the Territory advanced at the expense of its neighbors.
 A state of affairs such as described would not be serious, were there no other sections rich in natural resources, but such is not the case. With few active gold mines and some half-dozen
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1923-09-13

The History Editor received a dif.
ferent letter Thursday. that told. not
about the periilhden trails ~ the
wagons en- route overland 10 the
promised land ~ the West. bat Of
she early days u the Union Pacific
railroad. when it first stretched its
twisted rails from Kansas city, NO,
20 the uttio town or San Francisco.
The letter, from Mrn. q Birdweil,
2ii w. Main -. Lynden. wash.
follows
"Ah I came 10 this great North.
wet in 1874. I will relate what "a.
day would almost seem a tragedy.
We started from near Kansas city
my childhood hom7. on April 30.
1874. reaching kantap City about
noon.
I'VE left there about 8 p. m, on
the Union Pacific. Tor the West. on
what was then called the 'emigrnnt
train which meant n miYed train of
passengers an1 freight. There we're
seven cars of cmlgranis. all headed
for the Pacific slope. We were Sev.
On days IN transit from Kansas CITY
20 san Francisco.
ION our train there was neither
diner nor slecpers. Zach passenger
took care OF hla own lunch basket
and bedding on the last lap 81 our