The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-06-17
THE CLINGING VINE
 THAT STRANGLES

Isn't Barkers wife a sweet, cuddly little thing; regular clinging vine?' remarked Lake. the bachelor.
 "Clinging's the word" replied Smith. q suppose you just die oi envy, wishing you were the sturdy oaki"
 Well, it does sort of appeal tc ones male vanity, you know, to fec that a girl is depending on your strength"
 DO you happen to know botany?'
 Not especially; why?"
 only that the effect in nature, of a inging vine, is to kill the oak!
 You don't say!'
 Yes. the dear little tendrils get a strangle-hold and crush the virtlity out of the nice big tree, and some day 1t dies of dry rot"
 Well, of course you don't carry the simile to the human family, you old cynic?"
 Do you know what Barker used to be, and what he is now? No, l thought not. Well, he was d prom ising bridge engineer When he left the university folks predicted great things of him. Then he married the dependent little doll, and she has sys tematleally straneled every ambition, and prevented every promotion of his life, His work is mans job. which ought to take him into tho wild country and the far west but wife won't budge from the metropolitan delights, and so, he is anchored here. i'll d form of work scarcely above the clerical. Of course, she is very sweet and cuddly about it each time that opportunity knocks a his door. I've heard her throw the bluff about it's being just as he decided-but he is throttled by a mesh of silken threads, and blinded by a mist of tears, and she clings to him like the Lorelei whose white arms and golden tresses pull the sailor down into the bottom of the seal"
 Well. surely. this case Is an ex- ception?"
 Not on your lifel There's Lar kins, whose wife depends on him so that she hasn't a resource in the world. When he comes home a night, longing to work on architectural de- signs that may gain him a prize in a competitive offer, she casts herself oa him, and begs to be taken to the movies, and if he objects there is a scene, and she walls that she has no one in the world but him. and has been so lonesome all day without himn His career has gone to smash and he is broken hearted and inn bittered drudge"
 Don't forget Jenkins and his champion 'clinger.' while we're on the subject of the frail seX," remarked a quiet man at the next desk.
 Yes, poor Jenkins got one of the worlds best little clingers. and he too. is tied to the big city for life. Her speciality Is depending on every body not on hubby alone. She just won't leave dear mamma and papa and so Jenkins has refused at least three wonderful offers in various towns, which would have spelled sue cess and developed him greatly. His in-laws live with him. and pet her She was a spoiled darling at home and she has annexed another oak so that her tiny tendrils wind around and about several sturdy trees, all of which are enthusiastically showing sings of decay!"
 q take 1t that you go In for strong minded women?" slyly queried the bachelor. You like your whisky strong and your women wild?"
 Well, hold no brief for the mas terfut or domineering female, and I appreciate charm and feminine tact and sweetness as well as any man but If girls begin to cast sheep's eyes at me, and gaze up soulfully, and murmur, How strong and manly you are; you frighten poor little me- l give 'em the air, you can betrt
 Time was when the majority of men desired frail helpless wives-to- day it is the minority; and even they don't know the vine Is poison ivyi"