davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-03-18

stake. He has been quoting Black
stone to me all morning. II seems;
the abduction of woman from
her country is a felony under the
Person Act, punishable with penal
servitude to the extent Of seven
BRITTON Are you drlnkor am
ADELE For the last half hour |
have seen curious craft follow
ing in our wake. Oh, I am ready
10 jump overheard with nerves!
BRITTON IGgdpe and limp, feebly
reGclttDg for the dec0nterl - Now,
Just where Is the mysterious
woman-of.the1b basket?
ADELE Ifrtgidlyl Below.
BRITTON--Is she visible to the
human eye? / mean to say, she
isn't lust one OF your jealous hal
fluctuations?
ADELE (spttefEIlyJ She's shame
lessly visible! When the stew
ardess begged her to put on
clothes she attacked him with q
knife!
BRITTON interested As bad as
that? The TJscs.l l must look
into this.
ADELE Sit down! HE sits. Now
II want You to tell me every sim
gle thing you did after going
ashore last evening.
BRITT0N (cr0ssly)--I visited Bar
rington, the missionary.
ADELE That's curious. Rever nd
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-03-18
ThQRmlezp lie Basket 3, 3 f3lssaE td ns9

price Of my silence! lAnEt0assla.l
What do you say?
HARRINGTON (cltiming In actth
agitation Yes, yes! Let the
past bury its dead. Since the sin
ner has repented
VOICE FROM GOVERNMENT
CUTTER Alloy, there! In the
name of the Governors General of
Java You are commanded to sur
render the persons Of Herman
Potts ard Hannah Stone, wanted
on various criminal charges by
the Dutch Colonial Government.
BRITTON Ito the brunette and
BdrTtngt0n, achO appear to be do
ing an amount Of deep and dds
agreeable thinking Hello! So
that Is what you two were trying
to plIt oyera getaway!
HARRINGTON fbfktertv1 lit seems
we've muffed IL.
BRUNETTE lUtci0AsIg, to BGrysnO-
tOssl Or course, you fool! told
you q freight schooner was safer!
But you were determined on this
cursed yacht!
(SAe gets IN the bGsket and
slams dO4cn the lid.
HARRINGTON fsitttn0 on the has
Ret, doitfaIIyJ Never mind, old
girl. It will be 4 hellsof-a-while
before either OF rs sail again on
. yacht!
~
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-03-18

A DELE fOn saiaO the glass b'as-
n quelgl Here drink this. 1t
will brace you.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-03-18
COSTS Only Soc
But NY, HOW
POSIN HEALS!

a hundred dollars couldn't buy the
perfect relief that the first touch of
PoslRn brings 10 itching, inflamed.
eczema skins. Yet q box Of
in-heM1ing Poslam costs but Soc
P0aIam ID 30 concentrated and acts
so directly that little goes long
way. But its medication Is 50 gentle
that IL cannOt irfitate the most deli
cate or infaamed skin. Eczema, raSheS,
scalp frOnbles. pimples-they simply
cannot resist Poslam. Sec before the
war. soc during the war. Soc nOw--at
every drug store. For trial sample,
rs w. 18th Street. New York
Poslam Soap. medicated with Pos
lam. clears and brightens the com
pleKi0n and prevents return Of. erup-j
tiOmR.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-03-18
tC0pyfIght D. AuthOr, ana Day MusS HUV %
produced without her permissaon.l
CHARACTERS:
EDMUND BRITTON.A Millionaire
ADELE ........ His Wife
REV. BARRINCTON.A Missionary
EVANS .......A Steward
4 RRIINETTE IN a BASKET.

seen board the. IatTMtioHs
I aUcht Adventsre, OF tropical
/ eOGst. II pIdris1 sChitB cassrGs Gscn-
Ing. 6essetIth aOhjch sleeps q mon %
d deck chair. Us q se
\ T'ks nsdM spraUEs Ike q ttreG dog.
He u III cs-pnspled eVeMissg clothes.
a 1ittIe pay aft q tCONGA leans
Oreg the ships rail, gazing out upon
tie IpdiGn Ocean.
Seating herself beside him she
pFesseS all electric bNzzer. a fresh.
coAspIe 1i0ned stet0drd GppeGrs. The
4CONsaN padAes q comprehensive
gesture. The stelpGrd rGaishes and
re0ppsars scith a tray on iUhich are.
glasses, ID decdMtcr and a siphOn of
seItxer. He eEits. sThe fCOnlan
shoots the scttser In the glass and
the sIespsnO man GsCGkes.
A DELE ION eaiN0 the glass btMs-
II quels) Here drink this. 1t
viii brace you.
BRTTTCN p9shiag u GsC0vJ--I
d'wan' III Um goiner sober up.
ADELE sharply Take it! You'll
need 4 stimulant when you hcar
what rye got to tell yOu! (Shc
laughs Dtimlv.
BRITT0N fcmeygtnO from he
stitp0r Huh7
ADELE bttiMgIUJ You came
aboard long after midnight. Two
black boys followed yOu, drag
ging basket. When you had
DRUNK yourself iIlaensibIe A
opened 1t. A native woman was
] inside. We were well under way
when made this discovery. Cap
tain Blake was furious. He
threatened to turn back and sur
render 10 the authorities. He
said his nautical honor was at
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-03-18

Darlington came aboard at late
hour last night TO bid lls fare
we'll. He declared he hadn't seen
YOU IN years
BRITTON--Darned old fool!
hope the cannibals will get him!
ADEI4a Then you cant account
for where you were?
RRITToN (thrOlcinG up his kdNds)
III YOU want the truth don't
remember. Wish did. Might
be some thing to brag Of later.
ADELE lIOith bIGsiaO eyes Ed
mllnd BrittOn! I've stood lot
from you! I've been hauled
around the world on this drafted
yacht till I've got bilge-water in
my veins, fOg-hOrn voice and
bareback complexion! I've stood
for your champagne parties and
I've bIoached my hair and painted
my fare b make myself look like
wild woman because you ad-
mire that kind. But underneath
I'm quiet hOmeb0dyi I'm sick
Of traipsing round the earth look
ing for adventure! It's worse
than living In q comic opera. And
when you bring home q naked
hIIssy in a basket! Well! That
is where draw the line!
BRITT1N (EehementIyJ-I swear
I've never set eyes On the woman!
Il certainly should remember II /
had
a steaOGrd enters, touching his
cap.
STEWARD Beg pardon, sir. A
stowaway has been discovered
ADELE f,oith a scream - AN
OTHER!
BRITTON grim Here's where /
know the worst. ITO stesOdTd.J
Collect ALL the stowaways
aboard the vessel and bring them
here in a bunch.
STEWARD-Aye, aye, sir. (EGits.)
Two SeGD1en enter bearing
closed 11icEer hamper, tDltich they
deposit on deck. The Stea0Gid
fOlIOt0s up the c0mpdniOnUGy
ntGrching q clerical looking little
man by the Gr1m.)
ADELE lin utter GmdzemeNt)-
Reverend harrington! You!
thought you left aboard the
launch last night!
HARRINGTON (1oith a dry c0u0h)
My nnlooked-for appearance may
seem a trifie queer But I'll ex-
BRITrON (staring at him google
eyed)-Queer! Great guns! It's
nothing If not phenomenal! IL
this is Percival harrington I'm
getting the shock of my life!
HARRINGTON (OIdSsily)--I fail to
understand you, sir.
BRITTON-The Percival I knew
was big raw brute of a man. He
had a broken nose and looked
more like pugilist than a
preacher. Now, by what awful
freak Of nature could a regular
Teller dwindle into little shrimp
like you:
HARRINGTON (coIdly) - Your
memory may deceive you,
brother.
ADELE (Gghdst)-You mean this
gentleman isn't Darlington?
BRITTON-Nut unless he fell in
the wet and shrunk.
ADELE (Odsps)--Then I have been
entertaining an impostOr?
BRITTON--Oh, / wouldn't call him
that. II he'll wiggle his ears like
a rabbit I'll be willing to believe
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-03-18

II HE wind itself enemy consPires with the SCOT Of
city smoke stacks and the dirt of the change
your skim Unless you fight this coarsenng it will take
away the first smooth freshness and leave your skin dry
and coarse, older. In every big city today where the
menace is greatest using this famous method
to keep their skin fresh and supple.
First the special cleansing
that does more than cleanse
Give your skin nightly cleansing with the cold that
contains just the and kind of oil work in
and without cogging-Pond's Cold Cream, So rich it
cleans thoroughly and keeps the skin beautifully supple
the special sOftenng oil in this which
the drying effect of wind and gives your skin the beautiful
suppeness you Yet it is light enough wipe off and
never clog the pores.
And then the "ntailing outdoor protection
Never fail apply before going the delicate vanishing
known in almost every country for its famous protection
Ponds Vanishing Cream. 1t contains the effective
soening and soothing ingredient known skin specialists
keeps skin SMOOTH fully protected from coarsenng Winds
Use this double method To the great needs the
skim Ponds developed these famous First the cold
that cleans and oils Then the famous outdoor protection
Wherever live, under the trying conditions they will
keep skin beautifully smooth and fresh. These
found in all department and drug They contain nothing
which the growth Of hair The Ponds Extract Co..
131 Hudson ST., New York.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-10-02
|N0THE R-|N-LAW
GAG DOOMED
To DIE
Maligned Maternal Relatives
Organize to Abolish
Old Joke.
BY GEORGE T. HOOK,
International Na,ra -.

NEW YORK. Oct. 2-If Mrs.
Clara A. Giswoid, president Of the
Mothers-in-Law Association. has
her way (and women, with rare
exceptions, do have their way). civ.
ilization will have advanced one
step nearer to the milIenniunn--at
least the millennium of females
for then life for mothers-in-law win
no longer be one darn joke after
another. But the millennium an
proach is restricted to the feminine
element, because the troubles Of
male cartoonists and jokesters, who
long have thriyed on the mother
in-law gag, win have just begun.
All this because the purpose of
the association OF which Mrs.
Griswold is head is to abolish the
mother-in-law joke, thereby win
ming more respect for that much
maligned member Of the human
race, and to establish June Is as
Mothers-in-Law Day.
She Has No Complaint.
''I have had a mother-in-law and
] am mother-fn-law," Mrs. Girls.
void said, when. she arrived hero
from Boston to commence organ
izing forces to win emancipation
for the long-oppressed women, '.anti
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-10-02
OH|OAN To URGE
ELLIS ISLAND
CHANGES
Will Offer Legislation Provid-
ing More Room and New
Quota Basis.
BY international News Service.

LIMA, Ohio, Oct. 2.-Declar1ng
conditions at Ellis Island are ter
rible,'' and asserting that there
should be greater restrictions OF i'm
migrants who display little or no
desire to become citizens of the
United States, Congressman John
L. Gable, Lima. has announced his
intention of proposing a number of
amendments to the Federal imIfli-
grafton laws at the next session Of
Congress.
Congressman Cables proposed
amendments, it was stated, will In
clude:
Changing the quota basis for adj
hitting aliens to the United States.
The quota now is determined by
the number of aliens of any given
nationality residing in the United
States. The proposed amendment
will provide that the quota be de-
termined by the number of natural
lied aliens of each nationality.
Provision for an addition to the
immigrant station at Ellis Island.
Congressman Gable declared that
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-10-02
"oLD GRAY MARE BAND
GOING TO LEGION MEET

BROWNWOOD, Tex, Oct. p
The famous 'Old Gray Mare hand
of the 142d Infantry leaves here
October 10 on a special train for
San Francisco to attend the fifth
annual convention of the American
Legion. The "Old Gray Mare" wall
make the trip ''in persons despite
the fact that "she amt what she
used to be-
Red Kuykendell, Texas cow
boy who rode the "Old Gray Mare"
into the Hotel DeSota in New Or
leans and registered her on the
occasion of the last legion conven-
ton in that city, also will be
aboard the special; this time with
a Texas longhorn steer.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-10-02
OLD GLACIER VANlsHEs,
Barring MOUNTAIN TOP

SNOHMISH. WASH, Oct. Re
cent shocks felt IN the country
north Of here and believed at the
time to have been earthquakes are
now believed due to glacier, as q
gigantic ice pack on Three Finger
Mountain, unchanged since white
men inhabited the Stillaguamish
valley, has disappeared.
There is now bald mountaintop,
where for centuries was an impass-
able field Of ice.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-10-02

an immigrant family was kept six
weeks in a corridor at the station
because there was no room for the
family elsewhere.
A - larger appropriation. Con-
gresham Gable stated that moro
money to provide proper care for
immigrants is necessary.
Issuance OF quota certificates
abroad by American consuls, SO
that no immigrant will be COM
PEELED to return to his native coun-
try because OF excess quota; giving
American consuls absolute power
to refuse vising passports when
the applicant is clearly inadmfs-
sible; admitting wives of American
citizens outside the quota: reduir-
ing that children shall be consid-
cred Of the same nationality as
either parent; requiring every pros
pective immigrant to present, with
his passport, for vising a certifi-
cate of q local doctor as to con-
dition of health, and q certificate
from local police headquarters as
to his or her record arA reputa-
ton: providing for additional pen
alties for transportation Of mad
Missile aliens.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-10-02

I know from experience how q
mother-in-law should be treated. I
have never had any complaint to
make, for my son-in-laW has been
kind and considerable in every way,
but still am at the mercy Of all
1pkesters and photographers, who
have lived on the mother-in-law
joke all their lives. I want to stop
them and get for all mothers-in-
law the consideration and respect
/ have always had
Rules Suggested.
In order that the mother-in-law
joke shall die natural death and
that this class Of females may
win the dignity and rights due 1t,
Mrs. GrisWold suggests that moth
ers-inlaw live up strictly to the
following rules:
1. DO not live with the young
married couple, for tI1at Is fatal
to the happiness Of all con-
2. Visit only occasionally, but
never for more than 3 week at
q time.
3. Follow policy Of 'shands
orr in the domestic affairs Of
welded daughters and sons.
The revolt now IN progress had
It's inception in Boston, where the
headquarters Of the assoc alton are
located. but Mrs. GriswoId's CAM
paign will take her from the me
tropolis to the principal cities of
the country. Emancipation here.
of course, viii be the incentive for
similar revolutionary activities in
foreign cOilntrios-Or isn't mother
in-law the goat" in any country
other than the United States?
Members Wanted.
Not later than next year the as
ISOLATION hopes to have MEM
bership in every State in the
Union and then to- petition State
legislatures to establish JUNE as
Mothers-in-Law Day, and in some
way curb funsters from trying to
be funny at their expense.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-10-02
VI. R. [. CHANGES
ARE URGED BY
CITIZENS
North Washington Gives Many
Ideas for Improvement,
Answering Letter.

Replying to a letter from G. Mel
vim Sharpe, executive assistant Of
the Washington Railway and Elec-
trio Company. In which he asked
practical suggestions for improve
ments in the railway in that sec
ton, the North Washington Citi-
zens' Association, at their meeting
last night, advocated the discontinue
ance of one-man cars on the North
Capitol line, cleaner cars, replace
ment Of soiled leather straps with
celluloid ones and re-routing Of cars
to the Bureau OF Engraving and
Printing and Georgetown.
Re-estab lishment OF the Rhode
Island bus line, discontinued several
weeks ago, selling Of three tokens
for 20 cents, and the proposed Dis
.trfct bond issue, were also en-
dorsed.
Candidates for the election in De
cember will be nominated by the
following committee, named last
night: G. r. Brill, p. w. Pritchett,
Washington Topharn, III. K. Muir
ply and Frank N. Jarvis.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-10-02
WOMAN TEACHER REFUSES
NOMINATION FOR MAYOR

NEW YORK. Oct. 2. = Miss
Maude Conway. Jersey city
teacher, who lives in Verona, N. J.,
was nominated on the Democratic
ticket for. mayor of the town at
the primary election.
Notified, Miss Conway said:
al am not q Democrat and not.
even a politician. and shall not
run"
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-10-02
PRESIDENTS WIDOW
TO START HIGHWAY

LIMA, Ohio, Oct. Mrs. Flor
ence King Harding, widow of the
late President, in a letter to the
Lima Republican-Gazette, has in
dorsed q proposed road of remem-
brance to be started in Allen coun-
ty next Arbor Day as a memorial
to her husband. She has promised
to be present to plant the first tree,
IL she can arrange to do so.
The plan is to plant 5000 elm
trees, one every fifty feet on either
side of the Harding Highway for
more than twenty-six miles across
the country. The trees are being
given by Lynn B. Zimmerman, of
Lima, one for each of LiMa's 5000
school children
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-10-02
PASSION PLAYERS COMING
HERE. WILL NOT PERFORM

BERLIN, Oct. 2. The 106 Bayar.
ian peasant actors in the Oberam.
mergau Passion Play, who are go-
ing to America to exhibit their
woodwork and handi0raft III New
York and other cities, win do no
acting in the United States.
Anton Lang, thrice the portrayer
OF Christ. win be in the party, as
viii Guido Hayer, famous for hfs
Judas, and Andreas Lang, who
plays the role Of Petrus.
New Britain herald., 1923-02-03

ing. But he wouldn't touch the grain that Farmer Green set before him in a box. At least, he wouldn't eat it
 However, he stuck his nose near it
 if it was ground corn and oats, and blew into it in a most ill-bred man.
 ner, so that the grain flew in every direction. Whole oats he would
 hardly even look at. Old Ebenezer watched his neigh
 bor's actions with great scorn. What's the matter with your" he asked Mistah Mule at last. Why don't you eat your grain?"
 "Because I doesn't care for any kind they's given me-" Mistah Mule explained. T is used to having whole corn served to me. An doesn't see why folks 'spects me to eat what doesn't like. I reckon this Farmer Green'll learn to take a hint before long"
 We'll, strange to say that very day Mistah Mule shot a glance of tri- umph at Ebenezer, because of some thing Farmer Green said to the hired man.
 T declare" Farmer Green ex- claimed, T don't see why this mule won't eat his grain. There can't be anything wrong with his teeth. for he chews his hay. The only reason can think of is that he has always been fed something else; and he's so stubborn he won't eat what we give him."
 Maybe he has had whole corn" the hired man suggested.
 Farmer Green nodded
 "I'll hitch him and Ebenezer. up and drive down to the gristmill," he said. Perhaps the miller has some corn that he hasn't ground yet"
 Ebenezer chuckled when he heaN, l that. But he wasn't pleased be. cause Mistah Mule was going to get the kind of grain he wanted. No! Ebenezer was thinking what a sur prise Mistah Mule was going to have when he crowded over against the as he had when Farmer Green drove them together the day before.
 He hadn't forgotten that Farmer Green had asked Johnnie to bring
New Britain herald., 1923-02-03

tiRs keep ths nature ef the satsFsinl ment alsaks fresh,
 Next weeks vaudeville, featuring numerous speeisllies as Nell as SaRs dance, musical and aeTahstie nun hers. slll De changed on Thursday.
 For temeFTes night the manage ment ls offering a couple of high grade dramas William Duncan in "steelhsaTt and Burglar FF00f' star ring Bryant Mashbarn,
 On Monday, Tuesday and Wednss- day Agnes Ayers in 'sfhe 0rdeala gill be the movie feature. There are ses, eral novel touches that make this a rather unusual picture,
 The last half Of the week stars Ethel Clayton in ''if Were Queen" beyond doubt the most gorgeous production in whieh she ever has ap- peared,
New Britain herald., 1923-02-03
Fire Chief Sees Two
 Platoon Hope in Movie

Dropping into Fox's theater during
 preliminary showing of 'The Third
 Alarm" which opens there Monday,
 Chief William J. Noble of the New
 Britain fire department declared witn-
 out cquivocation that it was the greatest picture of its kind he ever saw and saw in it glowing tribute to the men under him and asserted that he hoped to make arrangements at each company whereby the men may take advantage of the theater arrangements offer to have them as guests at each showing of the picture.
 "As a fireman, certainly appreciate
 the fire scenes and I hope that those
 who see it and thereby gain more intimate knowledge of the hard work a fireman does and the desperate chances he is called upon to take will be willing to throw their influence to- ward the realization of two-platoon system here. The operation of the modern mechanical apparatus. as shown here, is not unlike that in use in this city; and the rescue scenes ar,. not overdrawn. but are such as many members of the present day depart ment may be called upon to make at any time.
 We have striven for years to get a two platoon system inaugurated. IL has been promised before. We don't | want any slip-ups this time and I hope this picture will drive home with | force that the life of a fireman is not just one pinochle game after another, | but, that firemen have homes and | families they want to be with part or the time."
New Britain herald., 1923-02-03
Sherlock Holmes" With
 William Gillette-ParsOns

William Gillette comes to Parsons, Hartford, next Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday in a revival of greatest success, Sherlock Holmes." under the management of Charles Frohman, Inc. The story of Sherlock Holmes" is known to most American theater- story of Hamlet. Still as a great number of theatergoers have grown up since Mir. Gillette played it last, it may be well to say for their benefit. that the play is built around the great detective from Sir A. Conan Doyle imagined and about whom he has told so many delightful and exciting stories. Mir. Gillette wrote the play and he took as the basis for his plot what he calls "a hitherto unpublished episode in the career of the great .de- tective, showing his connection with the strang case of Miss Faulkner"
 MT. Gillette will be supported by a large company, carefully trained in his own methods.
 Charles Dillingham; has produced dozens of musical comedies in the past fifteen years. but none. of them ever received a more spontaneous welcome from New York, Chicago and Boston than was given to Good Morning Dearie," which comes to Parsons theater Hartford next Thursday, Fri | day and Saturday.
 After its run of more than 400 per formances in New York this produc- ton has worldwide fame. With
 
 Dixon. Billy Kent, Ada Lewis. John Scannell, John Price Jones and an array of beautiful girls, including the dancers, the Sixteen Sun shine girls, it is no wonder that Good Morning. Dearie" has been one of t..e biggest New York hits since "The Merry Widow" first hit Broadway.
 Seat sales open Tuesday
New Britain herald., 1923-02-03
BIG CROWD EXPECTED
 TONIGHT BY ELKS

The Elks' annual fair opened aus, piciously last night at the Elks' home on Washington street with several hundred in attendance, The threng was in it's happiest mood and enjoyed itself immensely. judging by remarks overheard, st. Joseph's juvenile min. strels rendered an excellent program and the various numbers were we'll applauded, Music for dancing was furnished by i.yneh's orchestra.
 Elks are prepared to handle hig crowd tonight. The home is expected to be the central point Of interest in the city. Mecarthy's orchestra will play for dancing.
 Several novelties are found on the booths at the fair. One Of the booths is filled with musical instruments, uknleles, banjoes. etc. Another booth Is stocked with electric lamps. Dolls. candy, blankets and other stand-bys can also be secured.
 Four automobiles will be given away at the conclusion Of the fair.
New Britain herald., 1923-02-03
MIsTAH MULES MEALS.

Mistah Mule had a hearty appe- tite. And he was not at ali back ward about demanding food. To- wards meal-time he would begin to paw the floor. And though the old horse Ebenezer told him again and again to stop. he paid not the slight est heed.
 You won't be fed any sooner for making such a racket" Ebenezer warned him.
 "The longer they waits before they feeds me. the moro noise kin make" Mistah Mule retorted. And Ebenezer had to admit that that seemed to be true.
 Now. Mistah Mule always ate all his hay-and wanted another scrv-