The Challis messenger. (Challis, Idaho) 1912-current, 1923-09-26
Winning the
Widow
By EVELYN B. WHITMORE

mien, had lived next door to the colo
mel. In fact, only a good-sized var
separated the two places, and after al
this time she had come to the con
clusion that the dapper little bachelo
needed someone to look after his mate
rial wants besides that man Jed,
who glOwered like q thunderclou(
whenever she looked In his direction
Furthermore, she decided to anne,
him II he were annexable.
That settled, the widow proceeded tc
supplement her usual neighborly kind
nesses with further expressions OF
good will. These consisted Of appetiz-
ing daintIes that she knew wouldn't
fail to attract the eye and tempt the
palate Of any normal male human
Everything in the line Of edibles, from
soup to pie, found the trail to the
= colonel's door.
When the hand OUTS" as Jed called
them, appeared more and more fire.
Quently, the colonel experienced a
vague uneasiness.
The climax came one winter morn
ing as he was leaving the house. There
In the snow, almost under his win
dows, was the gushing announcement,
"Oh, the dear colonel How I love the
dear COLONEL"
"Scheming Individual" muttered the
angry little man. whats she after
now?" striding wrathfully up the road.
That some young torment might be the
offender never occurred to him even
when, from the tail of his eye, he
noted duplicate inscription scrambled
across the snowy expanse of Widow
Jones front yard. AS his resentment
abated, a sensation of fear came in
its stead. The widow was tall enough
to look clear over the top Of his head,
and who knew what these designing
females, especially widows, might do?
Pictures Of bodily kidnapping flashed
through his brain, and he kept close
inside his own domicile for the next
few weeks.
The widows reception of the wrath
provoking words was equally explos-
I've, and the coloners subsequent duck
ing for cover produced a snort of de-
rision-
$50 the old reprobate thought he
was acting smart, eh?" Her express
sion and tone registered contempt.
"Well, I'll let the little 'fraid cat Sc
verely alone and see what will hap
pen. Maybe twill start something and
maybe 'twon't"
She promptly transferred her atten-
tons and culinary donations to Gramp
Simpkins, who lived down next to the
parson. For a while this arrangement
worked, then the colonel began to
show alarm. The parson was a wild
over and might be on the lookout for
wife for all anybody knew. Conse-
Quently, whenever he saw his neigh
Dor leave the house with a suspicious
looking parcel. he got out his field
glasses and watched her. Sure enough,
she turned into the parsons driveway
every time.
And Biny's Cher name was Ara
bine) the best cook In this burg" he
walled, jealousy. Twas mighty nice
of her to fetch Jed and me those |
tasty messes."
Now that 1t was too late, he wanted |
what he couldn't have. (Such is the |
perverse nature Of the male of the spe-
cies). And he not only wanted more
Of "those tasty messes," but Biny, also.
AS that astute lady had wisely sur
missed. the way to his heart lay |
through his stomach.
When he could stand the strain no
longer, he invented numerous errands
hat would take him over to her house.
His clock was forever gaining time,
,r losing time, or stopping entirely.
Jed, the colonel's man Of all work,
'rowned disapprovingly on these mys-
erious proceedings. whats he larrup-
ng over there fourteen times a day
or? And there he was yesterday"
climbing that wiggling
adder to fix the water spout. S'posin'
hat angular widow had given the lad
Ter a flip, where'd he landed? Right
,er-punk in her blasted old rain bar
ell I" Jed could be what he called
dinged profane" when the occasion
demanded display of verbal fire
forks, and just now he felt like airing
II that he had ever acquired.
Later developments caused him to
cratch his head in perplexity. And
kewise to voice his disapproval Of
he whole business. Just see what
e's done nowl' he growled Gone
nd bought that fidgerator (what the
hing was for Jed didn't know: more
yer, he didn't care-not overmuch, {
nyway), and the new-fangled bureau {
they call shiverette lat |
.ast that is the way it sounded) and I
plush square art" I
He couldn't understand why the I
)lonel should waste good money on |
polish concerns, when the house y
as full of stun plenty stylish enough r
II angular widows, or any other kind. /
However. the widow simply smiled
,renely. She was cordial enough. but
)peared to take no especial interest
II Ix,r nd nj |