Shoshone journal. [volume] (Shoshone, Idaho) 1884-1931, 1923-04-20

Seltner Mcdonald or his wife gave
consideration to the fact that the
ages OF their children might have much
to do with the steadily Increasing In
ciemency Of their life together. The
TACT OF the matter was that the chill
dren had passed babyhood In safety.
They were In school; no longer were
they monopolizing the attention Of
their parents, and, consequently, after
all these years, Jane and Mcdonald
mad time to think about themselves.
Jane was not the sort Of person to
think and aDalyze, but she felt. Her
emotions were headstrong and she was
undiplomatically frank In describing
them. She knew that some essential
element had gone out of their mar
riage, some element she craved. With
something OF fear she realized that
she did not love Mcdonald. The urge
which had swept her into marriage
with him, and made their first years
together very sweet and wonderful,
had vanished. This discovery was fol-
lowed by period Of active revolt. She
worked herself into a state Of mind
In which she believed her husband
had become actually repulsive to her,
and, In her headstrong way, she told
him In a storm Of tears.
Mcdonald stood aghast. That such
a thing could have happened to him
was unbelievable. 1t was incredible
until he sorted over his own feelings
toward his wife and found that he had
reached a state of Indifference toward
her. The glow was gone forever.
They had reached a point which
every married couple must reach-the
moment of readjustment when they
must rebuild upon new foundation
or see their structure swept away by
the rising storm. They seemed I'M
able to locate a stable foundation upon
which to lay new cornerstone.
Mcdonald considered the practical
side Of the question The thing, he
told himself, was a fact. Apparently
it could not be mended, so there was
nothing to do but try to make the
best of 1t. The children made any
other course impossible, and finances
made this course necessary. 1t was
all he could do to support one estab-
lishment in comfort, therefore, even
had he been willing to do so, he could
not have allowed Jane to leave him as
she seemed to wish to do. He had
not the money to allow her to live
separately in Independent depend
ence.
James reactions, however, were
purely emotional. She no longer loved
Mcdonald, and to love seemed to her
the one essential to life-to love and
to be loved. She awoke bitterly to the
realization that the love which she
loved had not been present in their
home for years. She craved the up
lift of love, remembering how she had
been borne along blindly upon a warm
rushing wave of love during the first
years of her married life. She want
ed that again, wanted it to continue.
The idea of the commonplace was alb
horrent to her; the thought Of contin-
uing to live with Mcdonald as his wife
was repulsive. She was young, vivid,
lovelier even than she had been ten
years ago, and she felt somehow that
her loneliness and. her life were going
to waste; that she was being cruelty,
bitterly cheated.
Which, if you stop to think Of 1t, Is
a dangerously fertile state Of mind.
The first sharpness of realization
became somewhat dulled. Life con-
tinued. The household remained IN
tact, but always 1t perched upon the |
brink of disaster. Everything was
habit, humdrum. 1t |
was maddening, wearing, a constant
source of irritation. Chickering's were
Inevitable.
Mcdonald settled down grimly to
he task of holding his family togeth-
,r, Of holding his wife. He was es-
,entially fair-minded. he perceived,
-egretted, and tried to make the best
# it-but 1t was not easy. A certain
estiness of disposition added to the
difficulties. AS for Jane, she went
long thinking of herself, holding
lerself more or less In suspense, crav-
ng, always craving for the return Of
hat which had vanished forever.
Jane had always done much as she
leased, and Mcdonald had inter-
cred little with her whims and
She had her friends,
9th men and women, but, John saw
18th alarm, her men friends were
arrowing down to one. She golfed
18th John Firth. Mcdonald was log .
al enough to realize the danger Of
, but also he had the self-rebellious ,,
rain which drove her. sometimes ,
gainst her own viii. TO do those ,
lings which she was extremely for
dden TO do, or to accomplish that !,
ON which authority sought to re-
rain her. Mcdonald knew his inter
renee would only make a bad mat '
r worse.
He was more or less Of fatalist
o. IF she's any good, he said TO !"
mseIf, shell stick. II not, she'll :
D" And there he rested, hoping for :,
g best .
spbaea tbfnos haDnaned In those I'M =