The Telegraph-courier. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1888-1946, 1923-10-18
Only Camera Man
Likes Passport Photo.
Goods Take a Dozen Urges
Studio Artist, but Victim
y Sees Rogue in Picture.

MY heart goes out to the perso nwho
must have his or her picture taken for
passport purposes" said Jones, who had
just been through the mill. IF there
ever was a painful pastime it is being
photographed by one of these passport
specialists. sI'll never forget what hap
pened to me us long as I live"
Jones, who looks like most of the rest
of the 100000, set out one bright
morning to conform with the request
of the Treasury Department by having
a reasonable likeness of himself made.
In a few weeks he would be on the
briny deep, bound for foreign shores.
with the cares of his life far behind
him. He was about as happy as any
man could be in his boots.
AS he passed down lower Broadway,
he found progress just one sandwich
man after another. They all advertised
passport photographers studios and
they took particular pains to bump into
him or impede his walk,
They seemed to spot me as a pros
pective victim" said Jones.
He furtively made note of a studio
address Presently he found himself
entering dark hallway, ascending
rickety stairs and entering a tiny room,
the walls of which were plastered with
desperate Latin faces, nude infants on
bear rugs and groups of beefsteak
eaters.
Through another door, near a window
of broken panes, he saw an attractive
young woman holding her head as
though poker was stuck in her throat.
"A fiddle steefer, pleeze!' an unseen
man cried to her. There Elegant
Steel I've done II %
Jones approached the young woman
and found that small man with a
villainous moustachio had just taken
ar mic iYra wifi mn oh
more like cannon than camera. The
photographer paid no attention to Jones.
but ran into dark room, made violent
noises therein, and returned smiling adj
miringly upon the young woman.
'Eet weel be souch good picture y
he exclaimed to her,
Then seeing Jones, he indicated that
he stand in the young woman's place.
1t happened that the camera could be
aimed only in one direction, so its VIC
TINS had to be set in its range to be
photographed.
"Feex your tie! Smile prettee! !" the
little man cried to Jones.
The victim was only conscious of the
young woman standing beside him,
amused with his agonies He grew very
red.
Then with few odd! foreign cries.
the photographer scared Jones into
Wllu-eyeQ pose anu pulleu tne lIlSBcT'
Again he flew into the dark room, rum
mayed about noisily and soon returned
with the young womans pictures. She
took one look at them, paid her fee and
departed. Jones noticed her tearing
them into little pieces as she went down
the stairs to the street.
After some time, the photographer
emerged again from the dark room,
clapped his hand to his cheek and cried:
ICY, souch locker this is III bet
you'll want a dozen for your ladee
frens !"
Jones dared to gaze upon the prod
ucts of the canlera-cannon.
'T believe yo','ve brought out the
wrong pictures" he said. Il recognize
these as Mr.. Jesse jameson Is it Ben.
Turpin, the cross eyed movie hero?"
Don't you---"
'IIl buy the plate--the negative Of
these" said Jones. And when the deal
was transacted, he destroyed the plate
and the prints
But his signs of relief were for
naught He suffered similar experiences
at the hands of three Other passport
specialists.
FiHall& he had his wife take his pic
ture with their family camera while h.
posed upon the roof Of his apartment
house.