The Washington times., 1923-08-23
PARLIAMENTARY
BACHELORS
GLOAT
Celebrate Their CeIibacy Be-
hind Barred Doors With
Much Merriment.
By r. A. WRAY,
Nv International News Service.

Nv International News Service.
LONDON, Aug. 23.-Boasting OF
their freedom, hurting legislative
gibes at matrimonial chains. thirty
eight bachelor members of Par
lament have just celebrated a Sc
cret fete. when they wined. dined
and congratulated one another on
their escapes from feminine wiles'
The celibates should have mum.
bered one more. But unfortunately
an esteemed member, Onver
Locker Lampson. nephew OF the
poet Tennyson, had succumbed the
evening before and had become en-.
gagged to be married. Shame kept
him absent.
Gayety Behind Barred Doors.
It was q merry meeting ana the
sounds Of laughter and song IN.
trieued- the six hundred-odd mem
bers OF Parliament who were not
qualified for admission. The fun
waved faster and more furious as
the evening went on. but the doors
were barred and the tinkling Of
glasses was not any consolation to
the married ones who sought entry.
= Sir Robert Horne, ex-Chancellor
of the Exchequer, presided. The
floral decorations consisted OF
such flowers as bachelors but
TONS" ''love lies bleding' and love
In q mist" The first toast was
that of the Prince Of Wales-'the
a best and most popular bachelor.
The chairman gave the toast OF
Perpetual Celibacy," and he
adorned 1t with some stories. Said
he:
man were at the altar awaiting the
bride. The bridegroom became
very white and seemed to be about
TO faint.
whats wrang WI We. Jock7'
asked the greomsman. Yer face
is like chalk. Haze ye lost ony-
thing? Hae We lost the ring?
mo was the reply. But q |
doot ave lost ma enthusiasm"
A Scotswoman, said Sir Robert
Horne. was commenting on men In
general.
MEN are fist IKE teeth" she
said. They are Ill to get. When
re get them they are q constant
source Of vexation. and when ye
lose them. what q gap they leave"
Not Masterpiece"
4 husband was getting tired Of |
his wife and q mutual friend, dis.
cussing the lady and remembering |
that marriages are made In heaven.
declared: s 1870 -
.:She may be d'alworkmanahip.
but she il not q masterpiece.
In these days offikhts OF WO- |
men," concluded Sir Robert Horne, |
I'VE are told that the women no
longer run after the men. The
mouse trap never runs after. the |
mouse"
Horne divided bachelors into three
categories.
/. Those who are filled with the
romantic idea that some time they
would come across the ideals Of
their dreams. At any time they
might have to bemoan for the loss
Of these.
.. Those who would not get mar.
ried because they would not be
bothered. Even they were not safe.
.. The group, OF which he was
the only. member present, who had
not been able to induce any woman
to take an interest in them.
Argues Against Tax.
'sBonar Law" concluded Horne.
"oIice made up his mind to tax
bachelors. He happened to be
Chancellor Of the ExcheQuer at the
time. said to him: IT In con-
trary to all principles Of British
taxation. We believe that people
should only be taxed on their sue.
cesses.
:" you intend to tax us on our
9fai1ures, and I shall be able TO
prove, by producing girls who have
rejected me, that am neither q
passive resister nor q conscientious
objector.'
"Bachelordom," said Lord Hugh
Cecil, 'is in its essence Conserva,
tive. You are born a bachelor and
die q bachelor. You stick to tradf.
ton. I cannot quite envisage a LIB |
erai or q Laborite q bachelor. II
IL q contradiction in terms. wo-
man II the revolutionary; the bache-
lor 10 conservative.
I'VE have young men among M
who, are not like the old men In
the safe anchorage Of bachelordorn.
They are beset by terrible dangers.
They are not like me. have
climbed to the summit of the rock
and am safe from the cruel devas.
tating foam Of aggressive feminlnity.
"One Of the greatest pleasures of
the blessed is in contemplating the
tortures of the damned"