davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1923-03-15
A TRUTH EASILY PERVERTED

Senator John Davis of Dallas, one Of
the most conservative members of the
Texas Legislature and an avowed be-
lever in governmental economy. made
substantially this complaint to repre-
sentative of THE LIGHT several days ago
People are always condemning the
Legislature because their taxes are high,
but as a matter of fact special appro-
priations voted by the Legislature consti-
tute only a drop in the bucket. I wish
that the newspapers would enlighten
the public on this matter. Lawmakers
get blamed for nearly everything; some
times they deserve condemna .ion-and
/, for one, have been fighting these new
tax measures-but for goodness sake
let's give even the devil his dues"
There is large element of truth in
what Senator Davis said. Even so, the
fact that the Legislatures appropria-
tons add comparatively little to the
peoples taxes should not be regarded
as warrant for legislative extrava-
gance, or for the levying of all sorts
Of new taxes. Senator Davis did not
apparently, intend that his remarks
should be given the Interpretation here
denied, but if he is able TO distinguish
between the real and the specious that
is more than can truthfully be said
about some other members of the Leg
islature. They seem to think that be-
cause the constitution provides for ad
valorem and school taxes and fixes a
rate limit therefor, the Legislature would
be overlooking its chief function if it
failed to increase its expenditures every
year.
The bulk OF the taxes levied under
the laws OF Texas is for local purposes
The citizens themselves determine no
small part OF the total, by their vote
OF the tax money paid to the county
collectors the state government gets
only part-the proportion depending,
OF course, upon the total tax rate of
any given county. 1t is to be borne
in mind, too, that provision for taxing
the people for the support OF public
schools and other institutions is con-
stitutional matter, except as to the rate
below fixed maximum.
But though it is true that the Leg
islature is unjustly blamed for items
of taxation with which it has nothing
to do, the likelihood is that there would
lie no complaint from the average citi-
zen If the lawmakers consistently mani
tested any intelligent desire to cut down
the property owners expenses. The
Texas Legislature may not be justly
blamed for the present financial plight
of the state government, except in so
far as that plight is a consequence OF
the Legislatures failure to enact laws
requiring a businesslike administration
OF the peoples affairs. There being and
having been no such administration, the
Lawmakers are now called upon to raise
additional revenue in new ways, which
are not provided for by the constitution
The idea that fifty thousand dollars
is no money at all when raised in the
form Of taxes distributed among tho
citizens as a whole is just the kind o.
notion that has led many so-called bust
ness men into bankruptcy.
This, however, was not Seaator Davis
idea. He has performed a notable ser
Twice not only for Dallas county, bu
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1923-03-15
New York Day by Day
BY O. o. M'INTYRE.

York. o in
majestic Pedro the bowlged
ducking
haps smelling Of violets
with wrapped
ibis his dubed with yh mud He did
the pp ncm Of the manicure girl The romantic had
lished.
sights
the barber his helper Bring the lilac muache PASTE
Then another pudgy old fellow told that a
barber held him behold 1t
ITO Old Daddykins."
Those
nothing the old shop with plush
terrifying
might should barber shaving the
and all of a sudden the slip hornist struck bad
cafe until o'clock has a
Broadway Twelve
again serving the cocktails and champagne Broad
believes that the old order being restored but
rail different They that
locked old Reisenwbcrs in Columbus Circle
the ladies' earrings growing
with evening far below shoulders
has that eleven INCHES long
Broadway
leading fellow famous
the he has sympathetic and spiritual
public
acting fails register with them
Copyright, 1923, by The Mcknight Syndicate Incl
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1923-03-15
Pointed Paragraphs

Many a strong man is paid a week
ly salary.
1t takes smart man to write ar
unimpOrtant letter.
Don't call man fcol-he may
be foolish enough to fight.
A small bows idea of volcano is
q mountain with the cork out.
When woman gives her reason
a man might as well cease tC
ar"uc.
When n person is lost in thought
it is probably due TO his wandering
mind.
A man always looks we'll when he
is looking for man who owes him
money.
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1923-03-15

also for property owners throughout
the state, in opposing drastic tax meas
ures in the Legislature. And while
THE LIGHT has no word OF criticism for
Senator Davis himself, and appreciates
his remarks in the Interpretation appar-
entity intended by hir-that of being
simply fair to all concerned--indications
are that other lawmakers have tried to
take advantage of, and exaggerate, the
clement of truth in his complaint.
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1923-03-15

One day her teacher was con
menting on this girl and her dra
matte talent.
She'll never know the multiplied
ton table" said the teacher, -,
One of Sir Random Ronald's REM
niscences concerns a production q
Giuck's "Orfeo," in which real mann
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1923-03-15

("Ghosts in these days enhance the value Of
roperty. '-Observation in court at the Middle
ex Sessions.)
Alarm has been raised in the region
Where phantoms foregather and meet;
The whole supernatural legion
Is up its Mortified feet.
For the voice Of the lawyer has spoken
And put the poor things in their place
The spell Of tie spook has been broken
And blown into space.
With clankipg of letters and gldings
From spirit to spirit are spread
The truly calamitous tidings
That nobody views them with dread:
Gray Ladies may vanish or tarry
But no one feels any alarm.
And who cares II Sir Rupert does carry
His head his arm?
Nav more-the affront is directer.--
Your ghost is entitled to grouse
When boggart and banshee and spectre
Innreaa ~ demand for house,
n 4hinA tAas cir yespef Ae GssssRD
TIE Soul that can Never Repent.
is just an excuse for an owner
To put up the rent
4-Lueio in Manchester Guardian.
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1923-03-15
Food Package Sale Stopped.

New York, March 15.-The Ameri-
can Relief Association discontinued
the sale of food and clothing packages
for Russia Wednesday but announced
that there would be no let-up in the
free child feeding program that had
been aided by the S14,500.G00 re-
ceived for the food and clothing. Dis
continuance of the sales was in line
with n program previously announced.
The magnitude of remittances was
shown in reports that food packages
sold were sufficient to feed 1,375.000
families of three persons for a month
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1923-03-15

heard such complaints before.
Just now. during lunch. tina
young Dawson drawled: Look hereI
I'll give you $50 if you'll resiel
from this club All the membebr
heard him. Now. what ought / I'd
do about it?"
Without the least hesitation Cant
the reply from the secretary:
Hold on for better offer"
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1923-03-15
CAPITOL.
sax JOKES
BY JAMES T. BEGG
L. $. Representative From Ohio,
Thirteenth District.

NEGRO down In
Alabama was ar
rested by a colored
cons t Bile and
brought before 4
black justice Of the
peace.
The justic q
couldn't read or
write. but h c
frowned porten-
tously at the cul-
prit, and, turning
the pages of a fat
volume on his desk,
said :
"Niggah. dis yere
is dc statutes of de
state of Alabama
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1923-03-15


also accompanies
her recitations in
arithmetic wit h
graceful gestures
and puts a wealth
of expression in
to the statement
that nine times
nine are seventy
two.
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1923-03-15

giving vent 10 eA
cited and incoher
ent EXPLANATIONS
~ We bee
grossly insulted y
he shouted. whel
he had calmet
down sufficiently
II o w so 2
asked the secre
tary- who ha,
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1923-03-15

sodtS we're 1nLrt
duced in the seer
depicting the Ely;
ian fields. "Ou
expectations wer.
surpassed In I'll
middle of Soft
Ravogli's solo tb
nanny goats BE-
gan to bleat a.
over the stage
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1923-03-15

Rockefeller recently imported fam
Gus tapestry named "'rhe Hunt for the
Unicorn" ior which it is reported he paid
one million dollars. We'd have to want
unicorn mighty bad to spend million
dollars on a tapestry.
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1923-03-15

X" he said. 81
you agree to ia
this man for 20
welded husband.
After the womi
had replied in I
affirmative I'll
mayor, turning
the bridegroom
delivered himst
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1923-03-15

as follows: "Prisoner, what have ID
to say in your defenseT
A certain popular schoolgirl b.
considerable dramatic ability. Th
is plainly seen during the readii
laason Rut she
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1923-03-15

ONA'Nh abphI Aiic
work with the
circus. I'm a
lion tanner. L is"
he said. II goes
right into de cage
and stirs up dem
lions proper"
"Oh, go on ~
replied the other.
"You amt no
lion tamer-you's
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1923-03-15

Putting the city on scrip basis, as
the Black crowd now contemplatcs do
ing is but another way of putting the
city on the bum.
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1923-03-15
A Laugh or Two

A French mayor who at one til
held the office of magistrate ",
about to perform the civil rite
marriage. mi
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1923-03-15

Money makes the mare go, but as an
unfceling wit remarks. oh, how the
mayor makes the money go.
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1923-03-15
Where to Go

tauueylile.
Majestic: Vaudeville and pictures
Stock.
Royal Edna Park and players.
Motion Pictures.
Palace: The Dangerous Age
Empire: robin Hood
Princess: THE Worlds Applause
Rialto: Enter Madame"
Rivoli: "Grandma's Boy"
Grand: Dr. Cunning.
Tourist Club. 10 East Crockett,
open S a. IN. to IL p. M.
Luncheon Clubs.
Friday.
Rotary Club at the ST. Anthony.
L al
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1923-03-15

lion tamer-you's Just plain YIN.
The club bore rushed angrily intd
the secretary's office, sputtering and
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1923-03-15
Luncheon Clubs.
HI H.

Friday.
Rotary Club at the st. Anthony.
Kiwanis Club at the Gunter.
Conopus Club at the Menger.
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1923-03-15
THE KNOCKOUT.

("Ghosts in these days enhance the value o
property. observation in court at the Middle
sex Sessions.)
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1923-03-15

idea. He has performed notable SER
vice not only for Dallas county, but
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1923-03-15
Grand: DIR. Cunning.

Tourist Club. 11j East Crockett
open S a. IN. to IL D. M.
Palisadian., 1923-09-28
II You Need a Medicine
You Should Have the Best

Have you ever stopped to reason why
it is that so many products that are ex-
tensively advertised, all at once drop out
of sight and are soon forgotten? The
reason is plain-the article did not fulfill
the promises of the manufacturer. This
applies more particularly to a medicine
A medicinal preparation that has real
curative value almost sells itself, as like
an endless chain system the remedy is
recommended by those who have been
benefited to those who are in need of it.
A prominent druggist says, "Take for
example DR.. Kilmer's Swamp Root, a
preparation l have sold for many years
and never hesitate to recommend, for in
almost every case it shows excellent re-
suits, as many of my customers testify.
No other kidney remedy has so large a
sale"
According to sworn statements and
verified testimony of thousands who have
used the preparation, the success of DR..
Kilmer's Swamp-Root is due to the fact,
so many people claim, that it fulflls al
most every wish in overcoming kidney.
liver and bladder ailments, corrects uri-
nary troubles and neutralizes the uric acid
which causes rheumatism.
You may receive a sample bottle of
Swamp-Root by parcel post Address DR..
Kilmer & Co., Binghamton, N. Y, and
enclose ten cents; also mention this paper
Large and medium size bottles for sale at
all drug res.-Advertisement
In some parts Of this glorious land
of the free weddings are almost as nu-
merous as divorces.
Palisadian., 1923-09-28
Name of CrahappIe.

The name crabapple appears to be
of Scandinavian origin. and akin to
the Swedish "krabbaple," says Nature
Magazine. Skeat offers the explana-
tion that the Swedish word is related
to the name "krabba," as applied to
the sea creature. He adds that appli-
cation of the word to the fruit was
perhaps from some notion of pinch
ing, in allusion to the extreme sour
ness of the taste" of the crabapple.
In this he finds resemblance to the
"pinching" action of the claws of the
cruStacean.
Palisadian., 1923-09-28
A Healthy Climate.

you must go to the healthiest
neighborhood you can find" said the
eminent specialist to Mr.. Forsythe.
"And when you get there you must
stay there for six months and have
a thoroughly good rest"
In due course Mr.. Forsythe arrived
at the seaside town he had selected
and inquired of one of the old inhab-
itants if it was really healthy neigh
borhood.
"Well, you see me-" said the old
man, who was fine specimen of
health and vigor, "wnen l came here
l couldn't walk across the room and
! hadn't the strength to utter single
word. l had scarcely hair on my
head and l had to be lifted on and
off the bed"
! "Ah, you give me hope" said the
invalid. How long have you been
here?"
81 was born here" was the reply
Palisadian., 1923-09-28

couldn't do my work without help, and
the doctors told me that an operation
was all there was left. would not
consent to that, so my husband brought
Vegetable Compound and begged me
to take it. ! have taken fourteen bot
ties of it and ! feel ten years younger.
Life is full of hope. l do all my house.
work and had a large garden this year.
/ never will be without the Vegetable
Compound in the house, and when my
two little girls reach womanhood I in
tend to teach them to take it. / am
never too busy to tell some suffering
sister of my help, and you can use my
name and letter to spread the good
news Of Lydia E. Pinkham' s medicines.
Mrs. Ida M. CoFFMAN, R.B.2. Sidell. Ill.
Palisadian., 1923-09-28
Photos Detect Rash.

Photographs have shown sympto-
matte measles developing under chill
dren's skin days before it was visible
to the eye. The camera Is being
studied by medical men as a means Of
early diagnosis of smallpox and other
diseases involving a rash. People In
contact with known cases could be
photographed before any rash develops
ON the outer skin. If the camera re-
vealed the disease on them, they could
be removed to isolation before they
became infective.
Palisadian., 1923-09-28

ITS to be fine reunion"
Eyes, squeal, squeal," said Miss
Ham. 1T is to be fine reunion. Peo-
pie mustn't think they're the only
ones who can meet about and have
family reunions where all the rela-
tives and grandfathers and grand
mothers and grandchildren and uncles
and aunts and cousins and daughters
in-law come.
1--WE, of the barnyard, can also have
a splendid reunion!"
"Oh yes, every one must come to the
reunion" said Billy Goat.
''1'hey must, grunt, grunt," said
Brother Bacon.
"Has every invitation been sent
out?" asked Mrs. Ham.
"Every one," said Mrs. Duck.
Just then a caterpillar crawled along
through the barnyard, hurrying out of
the way for fear he might be eaten
or trampled upon or killed in one of
the ways creatures had of getting rid
of caterpillars.
Billy Goat saw him and sang this
song:
THE caterpillar only crawls,
He is not much admired,
But he'll become a butterfly
For with high ambitions he's fired"
Everyone congratulated Billy Goat
upon his song which was a quite orig
were a little better than the music,
but it was all good, all good, they said.
And Billy Goat was delighted with
the praise. In fact SO delighted was
he that he said he had another he'd
sing, though he'd have to think little
about 1t.
While he was thinking, though, he
was talking about it.
"You see," he said, 81 heard one of
the young ladies talking the other
day, and it seemed she had gone to
town dressed in all her old clothes
because it had been rainy day when
she had started.
Eyes, she had on an old hat, and
old shoes and rubbers, and an old
skirt and coat. And no sooner had
she reached town than the sun came
out and there was she on this most
beautiful day feeling 30 like an old
rainy day.
so this is the song I'm making uJ
about that.
There's nothing sadder in this world
Than to have the sun come out
When you're dressed in all your ole
clothes
Because you were in doubt"
"Of course" said Billy Goat, ''she
had been in doubt as to whether she'd
wear her good ones because she had
seen little blue sky in one corner OF
the sky but she had been afraid that
1t would rain"
1--WE see, we see; fine verse, Billy
Goat. We shall have to name you
the Poet of the Barnyard. Truly that
would be an honor and one that you
deserve" the other animals said.
So when the creatures all came tc
the Barnyard Reunion Billy Goat OIL
Sir William Goat, the Gentleman, was
also called 'The Barnyard Poet"
Yes, everyone was on hand, or per
haps one should say on foot. for the
Palisadian., 1923-09-28
Intricate

The most marvellous machine In the
world, invented by an English gas-fit-
ter, was exhibited recently before the
British Medical association. The dem
onstrator was an armless man, who
sat before small table and with his
feet operated the mechanism which
was situated beneath Over the table
came two long, thin groping arms, like
bent gas pipes, which in an uncanny
way picked up from a rack the various
implements required by the armless
man The latter, simply by careful
movement of his feet, took a knife and
fork, ate good meal washed him
sell, struck a march, lighted cigarette
and wrote a letter In pencil, placing 1t
inside an envelope and sealing 1t down
Palisadian., 1923-09-28
w. N. u, NEW YORK, NO. ss--1sas.
How She Felt About 1t.

Mrs. Carter dropped in at the office
for few minutes chat with her hus-
band.
John" she remarked, Il think you
had better discharge that stenogra-
pher you have now. / am sure she
has been trying to fiirt with you ever
since she has been here"
Mrs. Carter, when she said this,
thought the stenographer was safely
out of hearing-but she wasn't! She
stepped to the door of the private
office and vented her indignation:
Madame, I'll have you know that
l wouldn't f1irt with your old husband
for a million dollars !"
Mrs. Carter was aghast.
Now, John" she exclaimed, 'you
simply must discharge that girl She
has insulted you !'-Kansas City Star.
Palisadian., 1923-09-28

and hens and roosters and pigs and
geese and turkeys.
In fact it was a splendid reunion
and there was excellent food, though
of course the Pig family forgot about
entertaining any but themselves when
the food came along
But there was enough to go around.
The Geese weren't quite as polite
as they should have been, of course,
but taking it all in all it was splen'
did barnyard reunion.
Palisadian., 1923-09-28

reunion. Z Ork Y
Pig and Mrs. Duck
helped to enter
tain.
The song spar
rows came and
the owl sent word
he was sleeping
or he'd come.
Ct h e y h a d MT
asked him so they
were just as glad
he couldn't Gomez
The Dog who had
become so brave
came along, so did
Sharpy Squirrel,
Running Rabbit,
Mrs. Blue Jay,
and all of the
Palisadian., 1923-09-28

Sluc, WHICH was ai-
mostunbearable, and
/ could not even let
the bed clothing rest
on my body at night.
I had been sick for
seven years, but not
so bad until the last
eighteenmonths, and
had become so run
down that l cared
for n o b dy, an d
would rather have
diod fbop live T
Palisadian., 1923-09-28
PILES
Hone Bottle colac Pills Did Wonders'

HOne Bottle Colac Pills Did Wondersn
'My case is of long standing, but one
bottle of Colac Pile Pills has done Won
ders. They have done more for me
than all the doctors.' Charles Ammer-
man, 202 Howard ST., Bellefonte, Pa
COLAC PILE PILLS are a real in
ternal remedy. COLAC stimulates
circulation in lower bowel where piles
originate and drives them away. Do
away with salves, suppositories and OPP
erations. Only 60c at druggists or 65c
postpaid plain wrapped from COlac
Chemical Co., Glens Falls, n. Y.
Palisadian., 1923-09-28
After Thirty Years.

Magistrate-After thirty years as
husband-do you say that your mar
ried life is a failure?
Husband (guardedly)-Well to tell
you the truth, | do not remember any
other kind of life
Palisadian., 1923-09-28
Silver Lininq.

There had been a blowout, and the
father of the family was perspiring-
ly and profanely changing tires.
81 don't see why you have to talk
that way" said his wife reproach-
fully. "You act as if it were a total
loss. You never see the good in
things"
"Well, what good is there in this?'
"Why, it tickled the baby so. He
laughed right out loud when it went
bang !"-American Legion Weekly.
Palisadian., 1923-09-28
WOMEN CAN DYE ANY
GARMENT, DRAPERY

Don't wonder whether you can dye
or tint successfully, because perfect
home dyeing is guaranteed with "Dfa-
mond Dyes" even if you have never
dyed before. Druggists have all colors.
Directions in each package.-Adver-
tisement.
Palisadian., 1923-09-28
Got 1t in the Neck.

Little Helen-Brother Charles can't
come to school. He has diphtheria.
Teacher-Indeed! Where did he get
It?
Little Helen-In the neck.
Palisadian., 1923-09-28
A Garden Zoo.

Mother" said an imaginative lit
tie fellow, II am going to have cir
Gus in the garden"
"Where are. you going to get the
animals, dear?"
"Why, I've got dandelions, tiger
lilies and the big elephants ear, and
Pm going to have the trumpet flowers
blow in the band.-Boston Transcript.
Palisadian., 1923-09-28

GIowworms Brightest Before Storm.
Glowworms. are much more brilliant
when a storm is coming than at other
seasons. Like many other mysteries of
nature, this curious circumstance has
never been explained.
Palisadian., 1923-09-28
Bucoiic.

bUCOITC.
1t is a pleasant thing at early dawn
to go forth into the open and to hear
the young tractor whinny with JOY at
sight of the oil can.-Lafayette jour
nal Courier.
Palisadian., 1923-09-28

By the time young men are twenty
1--WE years old, you can usually pick
cut those who viii succeed.
Palisadian., 1923-09-28
BARNARD TALE

"There is going to be great meet,
ing in the barnyard," said Porky Pig
Palisadian., 1923-09-28

Watch cuticura Improve Your Skin.
On rising and retiring gently smear
the face with Cuticura Ointment
Wash off Ointment in five minutes
with Cuticura Soap and hot water. 1t
is wonderful what Cuticura will do
for poor compilations, dandruff, itching
and red, rough Observation-Disclosures.
Palisadian., 1923-09-28
MRS. COFFMAn
ILL SEVEN YEARS
Saved from an Operation by Lydia
E. Pinkham's Vegetable
Compound
EIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIjIIIl,

Sidell, Ill.-"T was a nervous wreck.
/ was suffering from a pain in my left
Palisadian., 1923-09-28

'iuht, Si uHt, dil
come to the meet
ing"
"All come to the
meeting" said
NJ + S. D u C k.
"Quack, quack, all
come to the meet
ing.
Yes, cock-a-
doodle-do," said
Red Top the
Rooster, "all come
to the meeting.
All t h e o | d
friends and enc
mies-though I
trust there are
no enemieS-will
come and greet
each other.
Palisadian., 1923-09-28

Boy Who Leads.
1.-THE boy who reads is the boy who
leads"
Palisadian., 1923-09-28
So Unconventional

So Unconventional.
How do you like your job as tele-
phone operator?"
"Oh. 1t Is all right"
"But doesn't 1t embarrass you to
take rings from strange menT'-Ion-
don Tit-Bits.
Palisadian., 1923-09-28

Everyone has had an admired pho
tograph of himself which he tore up
fifteen years later.