Perth Amboy evening news., 1923-07-28
NI6
IXlftl@
WONd
BY MILTON BRoNNER
NEA Service Writer

OF the SIedlSSl
Jokes ever perpetrated by a corpor-
alton was recently pulled by the
London transportation trust. which
controls the subway and omnibus
system of the big city. 1t put up a
poster giving figures to prove tina!
slow old London is faster than rapid
New York as regards its subway
trains, its omnibuses, taxis, street
cars and pedestrians.
TO an American living in London,
who also knows his New York, the
whole thing seems ridiculous. In
the first place all the London sub
ways are two-track affairs, one for
the up and one for the down trains.
whereas the New York subways have
-four tracks, of which two are devoted
to express traffic. These trains whizz
so rapidly they would make a Lon
doner's hair stan don end.
II was claimed our Broadway
| street cars made only nine miles an
hour. compared with 10 miles made
nv footing cars. But consider the
! difference: The Broadway cars travel
on one of the busiest thoroughfares
In the world. footing Is merely a
suburban section of London.
But, browning joke of all, right
| after the subway posters appeared,
| some of the London newspapers
started a crusade about the SLOW"
| progress made by vehicles on the
| main streets, which were always be-
ing blocked SO that 1t was faster to
walk to a place than ride.
AS long as the list of famous men
and I'M holds out, it looks as II
John Drinkwater, the English poet
and dramatist, will be able to write
| plays until he Is 80.
Having scored a huge success on
both sides OF the ocean with "Abra-
ham LINCOLN" he has since offered
MARY stuart" 'Oliver CromweH
and now Robert E. Lee. And 1t is
understood he has written the lipret-
to for an opera about the Scotch poet
Robert Burns n has in hand an
other American play about Jonn
brown, whose body lies mou
in the grave"
nlays about Queen Mary and Crom-
we'll and are not much kinder to the
one lust produced about e one
London Paragraphers says, in all Sc
robustness:
~ l91ilioD PtORAS
now who Lee was. There was a
song not long ago called Waiting for
the Robert Z. Lee and l actually
heard one man ask If it was a play
about a song writer"
Americans who lave seen the play
grin because these Virginians don't
talk with a southern, but with a de-
| eided English accent. Just as they
| grinned when they saw the British
production of Lincoln. The man who
| played the title part was a splendid
actor, but he was several feet short
er than Abe and he spoke with a
delicious Irish accent!
Paderewski, the great Polish plan
ist and former premier of his coun-
try, has been having a rapturous
welcome here prior to his resting
for a second triumphal trip to the
| United States. And his presence has
brought out a lot of interesting yarns
about him.
F,rinstance, they say when he was
in Cleveland, former War Secretary
Newton d. Baker said to him re-
proachfully:
when you are P~aderewski, how
could you stoop to be a mere pre-
mier?"
An English woman, mad about his
playing, wrote him asking for a lock
of hair. His secretary sent a reply
as follows;
Dear Madame: M. Paderewski
directs me to say it affords him much
pleasure to comply With your re-
quest. You fail to specify whose
hair you desire, so we are sending
samples Of that of his valet, his
| cook, his waitress and his mattress.
Puns are often said to be the
poorest form OF wit, but there is n
which has the authentic touch of
genius.
A number of years g Jean de
Reszke, the Polish tenor, was the
idol OF Americans who love opera,
Paderewski was also then as now, a
tremendous favorite in America.
De Reszke was at a dinner party
when a malicious guest, hoping to
embarrass him, called out aloud ask
ing him who was the most popular
musical artist in America.
"Pah-de-resske," was the reply.
Now in one way, that means PAS
de Reske," which is French for mot
de Reszke."
And in the other way, of course,
| - laAnA- ID1INAAwRrol