davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Palisadian., 1923-01-12
Egyptian Noah's Ark Race.

One of the curious spectacles wit
messed by King Edward when, as
prince of Wales, he visited Egypt, was
a grand Noahs ark race, open to ami
mails and birds. The starters, who
were all driven by their nominators, in
cluded an ostrich, turkey, pelican,
a monkey, a pig, Cairo dog, and a
cat The contest resulted in the os-
trich winning in a canter, while the pig
came in second, and the dog third. The
pelican made play at good pace, but,
shifting the smell of water, all visions
of renown fled from it, and it bOlted
out of the course. The cat, too, was
cruelty treated, puss going capitally till
the monkey jumped on her back and
put her winning the race entirely out
Of the question.
Palisadian., 1923-01-12
LOST FAITH In PHYSICIAN
Mrs. Giles Naturally Indignant at His
Frank Admission of Ignorance
of Medicine.

Mrs. Giles husband had been very
i'll. For days he had been gradually
getting worse, but at last there came
a change for the better.
When the doctor called and had a
look at his patient, he announced:
"He is convalescent."
On hearing this, Mrs. Giles regarded
the physician suspiciously; and her
suspicion increased when he prepared
to go without further comment
"Well, DOCTOR" said Mrs. Giles,
what are you going to do about it,"
"Do?" was the answer. "There amt
nothing to be DONE"
'Well, you are a doctor, amt your"
retorted the enraged lady. "Ain't you
got no med'c cine for this ere GONZALES
cence?"
Palisadian., 1923-01-12
County of London,

There is a county of London as we'll
as city of London. The area of the
city is 673 acres, little more than
one square mile, while the area of the
county. is 1T square miles. For nu-
nicipal' purposes London is divided
into 27 boroughs, in addition to the
cities of London and Westminster.
Affairs Of the city of London are
managed by the city corporation, the
general local authority for the re-
mainder of London being the county
council, constituted in 1888. Greater
London returns 81 members to the
house of commons.
Palisadian., 1923-01-12
NIIIulgIUIIII||III|

well and strong again by taking Veg
etable Compound. decided to see what
it would do for me, and before / had
finished the fourth bottle / was much
better, the weakness stopped and the
severe pains in my sides left me. /
am now much stronger and do my own
work and work in the factory besides. I
am still taking the Vegetable Compound
and give itall the praise. Mrs. NELLIE
QuILLoN, II Morris St., ,Muskegon, Mich.
Women should heed such warning
symptoms as bearipg-down pains and
weakness, for they indicate some female
trouble, and persistent and faithful
use of Lydia E. Pipkham's Vegetable
Compound will seldom fail to help.
Palisadian., 1923-01-12
DIZZINESS NATURES
WARNING OF DANGER

When your head feels dull and
dizzy it. is often a sign of stomach
trouble. Heed Natures warning Get
the relief which came to T. ]. Coffin
of Brooklyn, N Y, who writes !:
Your Jaques Little Wonder Cap
sules are certainly Wonders In fact
it is the only remedy that has relieved
my stomach trouble and cured the diz-
ziness l have been subjected to-
One or two capsules will relieve and
prevent indigestion, dyspepsia and
constipation.
Get this great relief today. Large
package only GO cents at druggists or
by mail postpaid from Jaques' Capsule
Co., Plattsburg, N. Y.-Advertisement.
Palisadian., 1923-01-12
Efficiency.

Hale-If ever get married, I'm go
ing to get wife like my roommate.
Harry-Whaddya mean-does he al
ways stay home?
Hale-No, he takes hath while I
shave and gets dressed while | use the
mirror to comb my hair. And in win
ter he always gets up to close the Win
dow and turn on the heat for me-
Palisadian., 1923-01-12

81 simply meant
to ask you If you wanted to play
now."
"That is foolish question too," said
Oswald. ITO be sure, want to play
now. am always ready to play,
II can't imagine any creature more
foolish than one who doesn't want to
play"
Neither can l." said Oliver.
'Then why do you ask such foolish
questions?" inquired Oswald.
81 didn't mean to give you the idea
that I thought you were not fond of
playing but / wanted to count the
number of offers who would join in
the game.
'We're going to have sliding
game"
Ibid any otter refuse?" asked Os-
valid.
"No," said Oliver.
"Were not much like our relatives,
the Mink family" said Oswald.
"They aren't gentle and playful as
we arc and we only eat fish. They
will e,,, meat"
"The Weasel" said Oliver, "is also
our cousin. He is great hunter, and
he Is dangerous to the wood people.
We are not as he is.
1--WE would not hunt anything and
we would not hurt anything. OF course
fish is what we like and we catch
fish and eat them. That Is our way.
"We will not change.
"And we are kindly and friendly
and make pleasant pets. But let us
not talk now for the others are join
ing the frolic."
And at that the other offers came
from all around. They wore their
beautiful fur suits and looked very
handsome.
Then they began to play.
oliver took the lead and Oswald
followed. He. coasted down the bank
on his tummy-right into the river
below.
Then Oswald did the same, and 30
did every other otter. What sight
1t was!
Otter after otter followed each 9th
er down the slide.
And such fun as they had. They
laughed in their little barking way
and they seemed so gentle and hap
py and gay.
One little otter they called Mag
Tag The others real name was Mag
gle and she was little younger thar
some Of the others.
She wanted to play with the older
otters too and she followed wherever
they went.
One day one Of the otters, seeing
her following, had said to another OF
ter:
"Well, there comes little Mag-Tag,
she is always tagging after us!"
And so the name stuck to her.
But they were all so fond of Mag
Tag that the name became pet name,
and Mag-Tag would feel actually hurt
If anyone called her Maggie
So MagTag came along for the
sliding party this time, too. And she
follow ed the rest of them in their play
ing.
What a good time she had and how
nice the others were to her. They did
l.
Palisadian., 1923-01-12
Doesn't Always Work.

Married couples should yield to one
another's opinions to get along" said
the sober-faced man.
II dunno" responded the other '1t
didn't work in our case. | told my
wife 1 wasn't worthy of her and she
declared I wasN For the sake of har-
mony l yielded my opinion and said
l was worthy of her and she, not to be
outdone in generosity, l suppose,
yielded her opinion and said wasn't.
And so we parted. No. l guess what
you said isn't 50, stranger"
Palisadian., 1923-01-12
Fashion,

Beautiful silken nighties in win
dow attracted the attention Of the
Woman. And then she noticed across
the top of one of these nighties some
cats embroidered with much clever
ness. Playful cats they were, but even
In their embroidered faces they looked
"catlike," as. of course, they should
have done.
Did some cynical male fashion crea-
tor decide on this touch or was this a
creation for some fiapper who could ex-
claim:
They're certainly the cats pa
jamas. New York Sun.
Palisadian., 1923-01-12
Out of Date.

The mid-Victorian aunt was paying
her annual visit. 1t was Sunday after
noon and she had been left in charge of
the baby fiapper. Wondering how she
should entertain her, she said: "Shall
/ tell you a story?'' YES" assented
the youngster in rather bored tones
"How would you like to hear about
Adam and Eve in the beautiful gar
den?" "Oh, I'm sick of the Adamses.
Don't you know anything else?"
Palisadian., 1923-01-12

VI c o u T , e,
said Oswald OF
t er. "W h a t a
foolish question
that is" he add
ed. "As though ]
wouldn't want to
playl
Dear me, dear
me, did l ever
hear of anything
so funny? Why
| t m a k e s m G
smile an otter's
smile and laugh
an otter's laugh"
WELL" said OIL
iver, e. did not
mean 1t as such
a foolish question
a- - en,,~IaI
Palisadian., 1923-01-12
Parthian Shot.

81 wonder" remarked one woman,
what the other club members really
think of me-"
II hesitated to tell you what I've
heard" said her sour-faced companion.
IF you'd heard anything bad, you
wouldn't hesitate, so it's all right.
Thank you so much. Goodby."-
ton Transcript.
Palisadian., 1923-01-12
Easy.

Teacher-Sammy, give me SEN
tence containing the word "anthra-
cite"
Sammy (who speaks with lisp)-
We had big family party lath week
and you ought to have heard my aunt
rethite. j.
Palisadian., 1923-01-12

the funniest of
all: He wears flannel nightie when
he goes to bed, to keep off the lum-
bago, which is some kind Of stiffness
and cold.
'He is a cranky little dog, too, I
heard; but, dear me, when I heard Of
his even wearing a flannel nightie I
thought to myself that / would not be
surprised to hear of his taking muff
with him when he went walking"
"Oh, dear, oh, dear!" said another
otter, "let's not talk of. furs or muffs.
They make me quite. quite nervous to
think about"
So the otters began playing again,
and were as CHEEKY as CHEEKY could
be.
Palisadian., 1923-01-12
Exchange of Courtesies.

"What did you give your son for
Christmas last year?"
'Ten shares of Arizona Pete, which
hasn't paid cent SINCE"
"And what did he give you this
Christmas"
"The collected assessment notices
he received on the stuff for the inter-
vening year."-Farm Life.
Palisadian., 1923-01-12
Birth Rate in France.

During the first six months of 1922
the birth rate in the ten largest cities
of France showed decrease of 10
per cent compared with that of 1921.
The figures for Paris were 24,23S per
1000.
Palisadian., 1923-01-12
Her Prescription.

Physician-If your wife Is doctor,
why don't you have her prescribe for
you? &
Patient-Too expensive. The last
time she ordered me three months at
Palm Beach and went with me her.
self--Boston Transcript.
Palisadian., 1923-01-12
First REQUISITE.

Mr.. Blank-You are always chang
Ing your mind.
His Wife-The only persons who can
tbange their minds are those who
,a'ra them to change.-Stray Staries.
Palisadian., 1923-01-12
Dorothy Was Puzzled.

Mamma" said little Dorothy. who
vas looking at the pictures in Sum-
day school book, show do the angels
get their night gowns on over their
wingsY
Palisadian., 1923-01-12
No Help Wanted,

John, aged three, was being taught
to say his prayers, his mother debating
as the youngster knelt at her feet.
After petitions for father and moth
er and sister, she went ON, "And please
make John good boy
John thereupon looked up and said :
Thanks, mother, can see to that for
myself"
Palisadian., 1923-01-12

not treat her as a
baby, though she
was younger.
II heard some
one talking to-
day." said Mag
Tag. "'They did
not know I was
hearing. T h e y
were talking of a
littl e Pekingese
| dog-a dog. from
China, 7 believe.
"And this dog
has a Jacket when
he goes out and
overshoes, too, for
each of his four
feet.
"But this was
Palisadian., 1923-01-12
Woman's Aspirations.

Necessities with woman are the
things little better than her friends
have that she's got to get, no matter
what they cost-Cincinnati Enquirer.
Palisadian., 1923-01-12

First Association Of Chemists.
The first society Of the kind in the
world was the Chemical society of
Philadelphia, founded by James Wood
house in 1892,
Palisadian., 1923-01-12

The average girl loves to figure fn
a pressing engagement.
Palisadian., 1923-01-12

Pay as you go-and If you are 60
ing to the races hold out enough to
buy q return ticket.
Palisadian., 1923-01-12

Every man is willing to patch up a
quarrel, providing he is allowed to Sc
lect the patch.
Palisadian., 1923-01-12

WANTED-GoOd, Square, Honest Men-If
not satisfied with present work, unem-
ployed. write us for good offer. Work near
home. Pequod Nursery Co.. Yalesville, Conn.
Palisadian., 1923-01-12
OTTER PLAYTIME

Oswald Otter, do you want to
play?" asked Oliver Otter.
Palisadian., 1923-01-12
IN Gives Old Capes Glow Of New
uVO u Putnam FadeIess Dyes-dyes or tnts you wish

Scotch ldiom.
Donald-Eh, mon. what time will 1t
be?
Literal Man-When?
Palisadian., 1923-01-12

If the rent has been raised illumi
nate the whole family in blue.
Palisadian., 1923-01-12

When father comes home with a
crouch bathe him in old rose and
watch him thaw out.
Palisadian., 1923-01-12

If he feels little off color touch him
up with amber and give him a pink
chaser.
Palisadian., 1923-01-12

If Johnny spills ink on the parlor
rug try little old rose.
Palisadian., 1923-01-12
Comes Natural

NVFITSo fNetkNI OIs
Alice-Doesn't Gladys act ridicu.
lous?
Virginia-It isn't acting!
Palisadian., 1923-01-12
IN LIGHT VEIN

Scientists say different colored lights
react on the nerves in different ways
and you can tune up your tempera-
ment if you know what shade to use.
If mother isn't quite up to snuff dip
her in violet.
The Washington times., 1923-10-03
RE- ADY To MOVE
DHR|STNAS
NAILS
Plans Completed d Meeting d
PostaI Supervisors and
D. /. Executives

poinfkSsnt 6k con Tee anu
splcla esecutiye 1e
clikistSaas mail psob q.
pited thi1 Afternoon 6tlOwinr 8
ccnferencs 81 local postal sup
or 81 the Washing ton city post.
office.
Plans were made Tor the greatest
publicity campaign yet undertakes.
and steps are nov being started to.
ward securing necessary tfanaporka.
ton and adequate. station space.
The most important appointments
are TO the publicity committee,
which co-OrdiKates ali activities. q.
z. TAFT WIS appointed chairman 81
the committees which includes III. %.
Sherwood III. Il. k6lotz. Z. Otter.
back and II. n. Riley.
CO-0perates with Merchants.
This committee viii be charged
with the general publicity campaign.
including the preparation OF posters
and placarde, automobile advertis.
ing. car cards and window displays.
It win handle the shop early-rnail
early" campaign and viii act In co.
operation with local merchants.
It Is considered likely that Il
EAU1Ue Ct4tAVA4&M VIII Dc Undertaken
for the first time In local postal
history. Plans for this campaign
have not vet been officially pre-.
scented, but win probably be brought
up within the next few days.
II. ID. Sherwood was named To
aupertntend the work OF providing
temporary pCetais stations in
various parts OF the city.
Hiram Jones will be In charge oil
the transportation problem. A fleet
Of army trucks, II Is hoped, will
assist. In the carrying or mail.
Work for the Others.
The bonding and Identification of
temporary employees VIII be In the
hands Of the appointment clerk,
n. =. Shilling.
w. w. Day win have charge i Of
supplies for the regular and TEN,
porary stations during the holiday
period. He has already begun the
work Of securing estimates. on the
equipment which will be needed
This mornings meeting was at.
tended by supervisory officials
postal officers, station silperintend,
ents and inspectors. Postmaster
William NJ. Mooney presided.
The Washington times., 1923-10-03
WOMEN ARE TO DISCUSS
PL ans 70 AID HOSPITAL

The annual meeting 81 the Dis
trfcE tranch Of the Wonen's Home
Missionary Society Of the Methodist
EpincopaI Church win Be held Fri
day evening 81 the Iowa Avenue
M u. Church. -Four enth and
Emerson streets northwest, to dis
CUES o1AF4fable work for the Sibiey
EEnspstal which II under Methodist
ma9pacnn.
Mrs.. w. Clark Main will read
repof8s oE the activities Nof the So
cfeey and Miss Elsie freeman viii
xSnlsa The Country OF Lights.
a number Of prominent church
workers are expected 20 be present.
Among whom are. Mrs. Henry s..
Francs, ReF. Harry Evaul. Mrs. e.
H. Lambdln. Mrs 81 =. Amiss.
Mr.. Hattie EIdrld&e. Mrs John r.
Edwards, Mrs. q. w r. Stokes.
Mira -. e.. HynaoEi, Mr. C. II.
Hoage, Mr.. Harry Svaui. Mrs. A.
~. Tafoert. Mira clyde Edwards,
Mimss Mary H France, Mrs. 8. r..
CnmpkalI. Mrs. Raymond Chaplin.
Hrs. Lucfus G. Clark. Mrs. y. d.
street, Mrs. Mary Chaplin, Mrs. y.
d walker and Mrs. 81 = Hoage
The Washington times., 1923-10-03
R nICRE Asses
IN D IS
URGED
Assistant Postmaster General
Bartletf Fayors ReadIust-
n'ent ii Wage Scale.

BALTIMORE, Oct. "a plea for
q more just wage scale Tor postal
workers ana Tor an increased force
Of postal workers 50 that employees
viii not 81 required to perform ex.
csssivs overtime labor was made u.
day by First Assistant postrnaster
General John II. Bartlett ii an al
dress before the Baltimore Advertis-
ms club.
''I want to. touch upon the sno0ern
aalaries paid the postal employees
he sid. '.It - my contention tIiat
the Covernmsnt should IS ! model
employer. that the hours g labor
should not be excessive except in
emergency cases. That the hours
should not be Of such length az to
impair efficiency, because upon tho
efficiency Of onr men depends tho
deGree az service We can give you.
II the Postmaster General
policy not only % serve the public.
but 10 treat our employees fairly and
SOU rely We could give even bet
ter service than W. do Il We had the
force We have asked tor and actually
need az
d Governor Bartlett scored Cong ess
for lite failure 10 faslke sufficient ap-
propria Ions ~ adequately maintain
the aAEfnnii service hi declared that
Is Cons ress could be induced 10 pro-
vide ~ Ileces ~ funds II ID the
intention of the PostOfytce Depart.
unent To establish not only rostxe
from coast To COAST, but other air.
ways lib different parts 81 the land
70 that Quicker commune ation may
be had betN cen diff6rent points of
the nathan
The use ok ant1Quafed ana ante
dated mailing lists BY Americas
business concerns Is causing the Gov.
sH11Enenk Gead waste III nearly 81 !.
100000 q year. due f0 the read ldress.
ms nv pcstufklce clerks be apurOxi-
lnately 200, Oo0s 900 Incorrectly ad.
ssed Iskt efs anad OfiYer ma mat
ter, Bartlett said
c0lxing upon II from the tar.
payers gtauapofYis. he., said. we
lind that the salaries az postS chi.
plOyes required to al the work 81
sing this mall amounted "a
q sum Of over 81 ~ 90 900 e year &
The remainder Ok the waste, he en-.
planned Is caused ~ the necessity 81
.rehandiing the nj s-afd dressed mai ].
The Washington times., 1923-10-03
HELD FOR JURY
FOR TEMP
TO ROB
Chinese Laundryvnan Alleges
Customer Threw Pepper and
Grabbed Cash Drawer.

Charged with rObbing Chin Sam,
q laundryman at 1721 Ninth street
northwest. Louis Willis, . young
colored man, was given q prelimi-
nary hearing before. Judge John r.
Mcmahon in police court today and
held under $4,000 bond for action
of the grand jury.
1t was testified that Willis en-
tered Sans place and asked for his
laundry. mo tickee. no laundry. 2
said Sam, so Willis went out and
returned with the ticket. He ten
dered q one dollar bill and while
change was being made, he Ii said
to have thrown red pepper in the
Chinese face. After he was blinded,
Sam said, Willis grabbed for the
cash drawer and rushed from the
place. He got the drawer Of iaun.
dry tickets instead OF the cash
drawer, however, 80 abandoned 1t
on the street.
Willis later sent young coIored
boy for his laundry. according to
testimony and Sam held the boy
until he would divulge the name
OF the owner. Willis was arrested
by Policeman w. J. Barbee.
The Washington times., 1923-10-03
aid IN WELFARE
WORK URGE
BIHQ1VER
Commerce Secretary Cites
Need Of Health Stations
for Children.

Secretary Of Commerce Herbert
Hoover today appealed TO the 800
women assembled IN the last day
OF the convention Of the National
Council OF Catholic Women to cid
THE fight against delinqu ency Ii
child heaith ia the United States.
Dividing welfare work III two
parts that which Is done BY the
Government and that which q done
Nv voluntary service in commune
ties Secretary Hoover told of the
pfonounced benefit Of the latter
over the former He related the
need Of the estab lishmeKt Of health
stations In the various communion
OF the country, 20 as to decrease
the vast number Of reported infant
mortalities.
Calls .It WOaan's Problem. J.
This us. wornan's problem, \
stated the Secretary, reaching the
climax of his address Women
have more time and also Il larger
degree oG the sense of service. They
hold g peculiar position IN the
growth and protection 0e children q
He declared that this country ha
never had an accurate study az
the delinquency II the preservn kion
Of health among the children, and
when the United States entered
the World War. According Is 1fr
Hoover, Of 80 per cent of children
horn normally, only 90 Der cent
Were normal when they had req ned
4hM ara fff 4sNfSfffFf8W
The Washington times., 1923-10-03
fcontlnued dom FIrst Page)

Continued from First Page.)
4telcatiOn Of the election. He prob
ably win seek an injunction re:
ateaining the State election board
ffosn certifying the election 20 the
@4cEetaxy OF State on the ground
Sk Was umconsttfutiOn4l
The State supreme court would
then be called upon TO give 9 de-
Ca@fon upon the question.
Attorneys today asserted that &c
would require anywhere from thir-
tN 10 sixty days for the supreme
C6aft q reach q decieion.
No action win be taken BY the gOvs
eHnox until oornpleke returns from
y2n&eFdhysn election are In. Positive
ana LEGAL returns should be known
~ next Monday.
The returns indicated that all
tive constitutional measures which
were voted upon also were defeated.
1nterest in the election was focuss-
ca upon petition No. Is, q fact
measures. which included bonus
one a two 81 the proposed
a1llnnflnenGs 90 allow women to-
qualify Eon elective offices Akood d
chance. however to nose through
TO victory. The silent vote was.
held responsible Tor the apparent
deseak 0k theDo measures.
@arywlaex0 the election. Wl1achl
wns without paEa1ld or preoedent
ii American history was quiet de-
nptks the threat that had gone.
across the state that $4,000 OF.
aOvsrnoE WaItonss 'nsinute men
would not allow the polls TO open.
and that there might be hloodshed.
The peace was preserved BY the
ersa6eHk army Of specially depukized3
cftizsna ever assembled II any
State.
Oklahoma returned 70 normally
to-day. SaWadsoff shot gums and
s4salIy.s clubs were shnlved and the
citizens went hack 60 their every
6ax order ok things. Al report that
100 men of Ragen Athletic Club
krom the stock geras district Of
Chieago. are on their way here 20.
he1p Governor Walton in his fight
Al inst the Km Klux Khan was
received By the citizens who carried
RODS &c the polls yesterday with
mid interest and obvious equa-
ninalty.
The Washington times., 1923-10-03


COAfKl ND n row
AIEs LILY cFstaif1 Towers of
1s15 Nineteenth street noFtliv est,
ms lust been IEiked divorce
tro1 llek Iitls nd O0nis John
IL. Towers, 81 Paris
Mrs. Towers ms been granted me
custody q their two children.
Connmaniler Towers Nas ID com
Hialad d The naval aviation 80
pIapes which raade tlle first trans.
Atlantic fIlesl Although the
plane II which ~ rode did not
complete the trip, Towers was
hailed ~ aler0 and shared Iii.
the fun h0noes.
The Washington times., 1923-10-03

New Novel Of Ibanez
Has CaIifor Ma
neIllel
- Enternatiennl News gerviCe.

ADRIDs Oct Vincent
Blasco Ibanex, world St alnosss
author of the Four Horssrnen 81
the Apocalypse and other
novels, has Just published u
new romance entitled 10 RENE
Calafia.
The new work Is iii two dis.
tinct parts. The first ls al his-
toric evocation of California and
= description Of its present con-
dition. The second concerns the
adventures of 4 young California
girl, the widow of An American
Senator, whom she married st q
very early age and who left her
81 immense fortune.
The girl, who Is Cf Spanish
descent, Is guided solely 81 her
caprices, which her wealth en-
ables her to crafty.
The Washington times., 1923-10-03
Dali ElREANN HEARS
Mr.. HEALEY'S ADDRESS

DUBLIN, Oct. 3. - The Dail
Eireann.. Irish free state parlia.
ment) reassembled today TO hear the
opening address Of Gov. Cen, limo.
thy Healy.
The Roman Catholic members at,
tended mass In the Proc Cathedral
where tho Archbishop of Dublin m.
yoked divine guidance for the Ia.
ielatora. At the same time az
protestant members attended serv.
ices In the Protestant Cathedral.