Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1923-07-24
A GREEN GOPHER
ON THE GOLF LINKS
Ls.k;"s f. +. o"


The hottest day Of this year, thus
Tar. i had an invitation to 60 out to
the Augusta Country club and try my
hand at golfing.
Once I dreamed, after visiting a
girl friend, golf enthusiast in North
port. that went around in one
quotation to disbreed familiarity.
That's as much as knew about the
game or in fact, at present writing,
while nursing black eye-but shush,
that will come later.
I attacked the problem with an OPP
en- mind as I told my friend while
we bounced along in the one man car.
open eyes should have a say in the
matter.
There should be a guardian angel
posted at the dinky little waiting
room at the c. c. The g. a. should
gently but firmly lead the unsuspect-
ing wouldbe gopher business Of dig
cling in dirt) into the cool confines Of
the station and instruct them. Keep
your eye on thes BALI, Intellectual
Infants" and Next to Mother Earth"
should be somesof the sub titles Of
this heart-to-eye talk.
In passing by the course. on warm
ish days, have wondered that they
stood it in the hot sun. Now know.
They don't. They walk 1t, hunt
it, drive 1t. putt 1t and brassiers.
mean. brassie it.
But. aside from that, I was deter
mined to like the game.
We will pass over the preliminaries
~ ,t~{v - nIx k.w 10
Climatic arrangement. The boy GER
tainly reached the most Important
part Of the game.
It felt like the night OF my dream,
when right the first thing of the bat,
or ] guess ! should say, away from
the driver, sent the funny little hard
shelled ball, fying through the air.
It went several PAGES ahead of that
Of my friends. She admired it. I
told her ! had no illusions. It was
beginners luck.
I'd like to make this sound funny.
But guess my bump Of humor IL
located over my left eye. But more
Of that eye, later. And you should
see my eye.
I'VE will keep score. I said in a
fresh tone of voice as looked around
at the nice little cadd!e, red Of hair
and delightfully."- bored. already with
1t all.
Well. 1t was only about four or Ave
drives, before got to- the first tee.
And funny how that ball rolls around
on the green. We will avoid quota.
ton marks, from now on.
1t happened between the first and
second hole. I guess that is the To-
cation. Anyway, no enc will ever be
, fussy about the spot, because know
I shall never rival Bobbie Jones' that
youthful golf wonder of recent fame
But it was between the above SPOTS
that saw evening, bright aud shin =
ing in the form of many stars and
much blue feeling. It certainly wasn't
her fault. I should not have stood 90
near to her. We had just got to play
ing together. after driving off In Diff
ferent directions. That is where
got the black eve.
This isn't intended to be long sto-
ry.
1t was a case Of getting near to ma
ture. My eaddy evinced interest. And
he proceeded to place my feet for me
1t seems that a great deal depends on
placing ones feet just SO. hope some
day, If ever I play again, to get those
feet placed just right to suit him
<AAiy way iiC was ICoA PuttCtS "AtAi AiiO
How was to know we were flow
But the glances of the foursome
burned hole in my back. So found
myself sitting on a nice hot bench
while they passed through-with my
left eye towards the tall woods.
Then We pushed on. Perhaps ]
should say drove on. All had to do
was to keep my good eye on the ball
wipe the tears from my other eye
from time to time, swap sticks with
vari shaped ends with the caddy.
make mud cakes and crown them
with the ball.
1t was on the seventh hole OF some.
thing like that. BY dint Of much
dents in the hard pan, swung the
little ball over what thought quite
space. Well, it landed Just over the
lea. lost count of the times had to
whack 1t before we reached tile next
little hole adorned by . tall poe and
a flag.
"You ought to drive of Of that,
the thin tipped stick back into the
bag.
"How much should I make It in"
"Oh, bout three or four.
"How many did I make it I'M!
"Five or six, guess. But. oh, my,
my. the way he said that. felt like
hiding behind the stick that trailed
along behind me.
1t was smooth sailing for q while,
even though he had to fiop a young
bridge over. so could get the ball
out from the brooklet. Then. fishing
for into. said, "Is everybody "a
green at 1t as am?
Yes, when they start"-Squelch
No. /. And they play for years,
sometimes and they never get any
better"-Squelch No. 2. Ouch!
I chased that ball to the final hole
and staggered across the road up
onto the porch. 1t was Delia's (par-
don the familiarity again) lemonade
that was the saving grace.
But I'm going to try 1t again as
soon a. can. No. gentle reader, not
the hlank ave hut tho whfta hail