davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-11-15
BONUS oR TAX REDUCTION ?

It is rumored in the press that a split is in sight between President Coolidge and Secretary Mellon over the bonus. MT. Mellon wants to re- duce taxes, while many members of congress want to grant soldiers bonus. MT. Coolidge, it is said, must choose between them. Indeed, con- gress did once enact bonus, which was vetoed by President Harding. Opponents of the bonus cite, there fore, the fact that MT. Harding was opposed to the bonus. Such an argu- ment Is not fair to the memory of the late president. While MT. Harding did say that he thought the nation not in the best condition to undertake this extra burden, yet, when it came down to the final decision, he told congress that unless special revenues for meet ing the bonus expense was provided he would veto the measure, the impli- cation being that otherwise it would receive his approval. Congress, in the face of this admonition, enacted a bonus without providing any funds to pay it. For that act congress can claim no merest shred of public credit, for congress had every reason to be- lieve when enacting the bill that it would come to nothing because of the refusal to carry out the very common sense recommendation of MT. Harding with respect to revenue.
 It now turns out, however, that the program of retrenchment in federal administration has contributed to surplus, while collections in excess of anticipated amounts have swelled the figure until it is estimated that the end of the fiscal year will see a treas ury surplus of at least half a billion dollars. Thus it is perceived that the regular revenues do provide a sum which can be devoted to a bonus. If congress was sincere in its desire to extend the bonus, the next few weeks should be the test. Z
 MT. Melons opposition to the bonus
 
 may or may not be creditable to him. It may arise out of his belief that as steward of federal finances he should guard public expenditures in a zeal ous and Jealous manner. That he is directly responsible to the people for program of tax reduction, however, does not follow. His task is rather to administer the finances in accord ance with the acts of congress than to dictate what such acts shall be. Some charge MT. Mellon with belong ing to the group which made enor- nous sums out of the war and which is solidly arrayed against giving any of that wealth back in the form of bonus to the veterans. It is feared that Mr., Mellon is not a politician in the ordinary sense of the word, al- though any talk of tax reduction has a popular appeal. There is also sound reason for tax reduction. But it is question whether the American peo- pie want to enjoy a lower tax rate at the expense of their obligation to the veterans.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-11-15
Want Still Removed


 That is not good advertise iment for Troy that is resting on the courthouse square. Travellers will see that and tell about it to their friends in other towns, and Troy will be shown up in a very unfavorable light. Boys and young men will stop to inspect this odd looking piece of furniture" and will likely get ideas about how to make one like it. We refer to the copper still that sits on the courthouse lawn in full view of the public. The sherifcs force are to be commended for their effort in destroying the stills captured in raids, but it would be better to destroy them at the jail. or. some cthev pla0s as soon as captured.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-11-15
SMILES
The .Hoss, Called
(JudEe)

Sam was a colored gentleman very popular with the ladies. One night, Mirandy, his, wife, was go- ing through his pockets and found a card inscribed: "Louise No. 27."
 On inquiring from her spouse It's meaning. she was informed it was the name and number of a race horse. A few days later Sam was awakened from sleep by the stern tones of his wife saying:
 ''Nigger, your 'hoss' wants you on the telephone"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-11-15
BIRMINGHAM DESERVES RELIEF


 lie demand for protection from the railroad grade-crossing danger, the Chattanooga Times says: Safety and promptness in the movement of freight and passenger trains are de- manding that all death-traps be abol- ished. In one city of New Jersey a : recent accident to party of auto . mobilists at a point where railroad !, tracks crossed the thoroughfare on which the machine was driving cost the railroad company much more than would have been needed to bridge or tunnel the street. It was afterward promptly tunneled. The Pennsylvania Railroad boasts that there is not a grade crossing on it's line between New York and Washington, perhaps the most thickly settled section traversed by any railroad in the United States for a like distance"
 The above emphasizes the fact that ; elimination by the railroads of grade crossing death-traps, aside from the wisdom of a policy that would largely develop good will between the rail- .-roads and their patrons by safeguard Ling the public from this constant source of danger, is good business from dollar-and-cents standpoint. That the railroads would find the adoption of such policy a wise in- vestment cannot be questioned. The richest and, most successful railroad system in the world attaches so much value to the public protection that it Shas spent millions of dollars to abolish grade crossings in cities and all along Nits right of way for several hundreds tof miles. That railroad considers this good business investment.
 No city in the South gives the rail roads entering it so generous pat ronage as Birmingham. Tonnage orig mating in this district is said to be greater than that of the cotton crop of the Sorthern states and larger than that of the entire state of Georgia. This is steadily increasing. No other city of this size in the South or else where is subjected to so gross an in- justice by the railroads from the con- stant menace to life and limb and the ever increasing burden upon business activities arising from the numerous grade crossings. The cost of needful viaducts and underpasses is small as compared with the loss to the indus trial and commercial interests of this community year in and year out. Yet the city commission, which is charged with the duty of protecting the public welfare and which has the authority to act on behalf of the public interests, does nothing, and the railroads, which are under both moral and legal obliga- ton to provide relief, continue to de- lay action under various spacious ex- cuses.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-11-15
And Warm the Mattress

Country Gentleman)
 T have only one request to make" groaned the college man who had come to participate in the harvest.
 What Is that, MT. Smart9" re- turned the farmer.
 Please let me stay in bed long enough for the lamp chimney to cool, off"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-11-15
Season AnxiousIy Awaited

VT TUT eIICe DdIIy NHWSI
 This is the season that has been anxiously awaited-especially by the dogs and the hunters. The antics of these the past week or two suggested the~same repressed anticipation, the same savage im- patience, that marks the bride- groom soon-to-be. And most of them will come back from their first day in the field with that same honey moon over feelin', too.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-11-15
"Try Us a Spat" fG~@-a Dt.n~ AyA-~rA

NCOUSd ININtI NbWSJ
 We are wide open for eXploiia- tion, and if you goober-sto oil stock, rubber stock or land sharks think we are not sharpers, try us a spat! We've got the deadwood on you this time, MT. Shark; for if you skin us for our ad-in-hand we'll bankrupt before we ante the balance. Try us a spat!
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-11-15

An exchange says that when Magnus Johnson was elected by the wheat growers they were sowing wild oats. It remains to see what the harvest will bring forth when Magnus opens up in the senate with some of his new ideas of governmental efficiency.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-11-15
His Substantial Service

If Governor Kilby had donS nothing more for Alabama than to inoculate into the minds of the whole people the fundamental truth that without equality in taxation there can be no progress in education, he would have been a great governor. This he did, and since he has retired he has tried to keep the thought alive.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-11-15
Should Stay Out of Politics
(Gadsdenf JournalO

The Journal believes the public service commissions stand Is good one, and 1t is to be hoped that the precedent here set will be followed in the future. If a pub- lie utility hasn't foresight enough to stay out of politics, then it should be required to do so.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-11-15
THE ALABAMA PRESS
Roads Needed Now

We heartily approve of any plan that will give us roads now. This thing of dilly- -daliying and doing everything except to build roads has progressed long enough. We want to get program and pursue it~-tllat will bring good in every community.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-11-15
Where Are Propagandistst
 (BOaZ Leaderl

What has become of all those propaganda hounds who were so much in evidence before the Hon. Oscar Underwood agreed that he would allow the use of his name as candidate for president? Or ca nit be possible that the news- papers noisy then and silent now that was so short of steam it had to stop the machinery every time it blowed the whistle? If you can't do any better. boys, tie up t. Ina bank and let's whoop her up for Underwood. We may lose out in the long run. but like the old lady with the broom, we can show which side we are on.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-11-15

Secretary Mellon is not the first public official to discover that one way to accumulate popularity is to help a fellow to keep grip on his pocketbook.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-11-15
Means Bigger PayrolIs

(Tuscaloosa News)
 The new plants added to Tuss caloosa's growing list of indus. tries speaks well for the Chamber of Commerce. Not only that, we can look forward that others are coming. This means substantial increase in payrolls and also more homes to be built.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-11-15
An Applicant

(Houston Post)
 A weary looking fellow who had opened all the doors looking for work happened to see 8 huge po- lice advertisement headed:
 Murderer Wanted"
 Well" he said, scratching his head, 'it's better'n, nothing. any how. I'm going in and ask for the job.'
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-11-15

If man could be guilty of all the offenses with which Governor Walton is charged, he would be entitled to the championship belt as an all-round atn- lete in iniquity.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-11-15

While European singers are crowd ing to this country, the price of com cert seats continues high enough to convince the public that there must be some profiteerfng even in divine art circles.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-11-15
Cotton Mills Needed

NCUIITIdII ITIDuHcJ
 It is encouraging at leaN td not ethe number of new cotton mills and kindred plants that are going up and the enlargement of those already in operation in Ala bama. There is no good reason why every county in the state should not have at least one. cot. ton mill. The saving in freight alone, if there were not hundreds or other good reasons why spin- dies ought to turn near the cotton fields, should appea Ito the peo. pie of the South.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-11-15
THE PARAGRAPHERS
Passive Resistance
(Ohio State JournaN

tOblO tototc oOoi haiy
 A girls idea of passive resist ance is to think a person ought not to sit any closer to her than he already is in the porch swing but to let him anyway.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-11-15

It is announced that the federal income-tax blank is going. to be sim plified. It already requires almost as much genius to interpret it as to evade it's provisions.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-11-15

An exchange suggests padded bump CTS for autos driven by speeders; but padded cells for the drivers would be more acceptable to the pedestrian.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-11-15
Inauiring to Know
iBoston Globe)

An expert says that the grain used in making a ten-cent loaf of bread new nets the farmer only 1.6 cents. How much does it net the middlemen and the baker?
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-11-15
A Firm stand
Nashville Banner)

(NaShville Banner)
 A London professor says there never was an Adam and Eve. Doubtless he doesn't even admit that he has an Adams apple.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-11-15

It is reported that Hugo Stinnes, Jr., may invest in some American oil stocks. If he pays for them in marks, the deal will probably be about square.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-11-15

Announcements of more cuts in the price of oil tend to emphasize the worried look on the countenance of the average pedestrian.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-11-15

For obvious reasons there will De no general demand for the punishment of the fellow who stole six saxophones from a Kansas City music house, unless he undertakes to try them out.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-11-15

German crises have become so com mon that the outside world is inclined to put them in the class with the cur rency of that country.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-11-15
PeopIe,s Real Worries

Nashville Banner) The federal trade commission is Investigating an alleged stove mo- nopoly. The real worries of the people are not stoves. hut same thing to go in them.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-11-15
ThazgysS1eORCEf yse @BEARER,

The crown prince has returned to Germany, but there is no indication that they have slain the fatheaded calf in his honor.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-11-15

Reports that President Coolidge is his message to the next congress somehow put one in mind of the pantomime art.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-11-15

men in press-agency activities, both of them expressed themselves as entirely satisfied with results of the recent elections.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-11-15
Ask Wnlton, He Knows

Louisville Courier-Journal) Impeachment time in Oklahoma is much the same as the canning season.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-11-15

MT. Zangwill's criticism, coming from outside, carry considerable more sting than if they were a domestic product.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-11-15
ProbabIy Are Not PrintnbIe

VIIttSDuTS NdZttlV-II I1HeSJ What must be the thoughts of the former Kaiser as he views the wreck of empire!
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-11-15

happens to get pinched.
 To a Modern Sweetheart love to smell. Your hair. Fondle it. Play with it. To have your cheek. Next to mine. To feel your hot breath. On my face. To hold your hands. To press your lips. To mine Do you not know why? My love :. It is because. You Use
 Wumpkins' Peanut Oil Shampoo Bunkilla Complexion Mud. Blisterine. Pistachio Extract Hand Lotion. Tobato Lip Rouge. Etc. That is why. My love. -Teder;o "Sauerkraut Sales Increase" What has become of Liberty Cab- bage?
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-11-15

When an official body takes any subject ''under advisement," prepare to bury your hopes.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-11-15

Still, there are some of those hun gry Bavarians who stand ready to crown the prince on favorable op- portunity.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-11-15

Apropos of the resourcefulness ,f the Democratic and Republican chair
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-11-15

Horse-racing is the sport of kings. And the kings, alas, are almost no more. Quoque horse-racing tambien.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-11-15

Now that you have done your Christmas shopping early you might begin exchanging the articles pur- chased.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-11-15

The weather is almost warm enough to let fresh air into the street cars. Almost, but not quite.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-11-15
My Coshl

My Goshl
 Dear Torch Bearer: Under ordi- nary circumstances, the vulgar sport of horse racing means nothing in my young life; but don't you think race between My Own and My Dear would be perfectly sweet?-Clarice.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-11-15

It seems that the federal agents sort of took Mobile by surprise. Birming- ham will now have to make other con- nections.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-11-15

We suggest for the viaduct billboard a skull and bones on field of car mage, rampant.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-11-15
An Epidemic Epic

 La Belle France has stripped for &C., tion, so to speak.
 In this corner the ''Folies Bergere," and in this corner, Flo ziegfeld's Cu- ticle Corps, both contestants under dressed.
 Listen to what the press agent says: "Aside from the sordid financial features of the invasion, there is the matter of national pride. France has been told America is usurping the leadership in revue production; the cloak and suit trade is worried by the audacity of New York designers. Re- prisals are planned"
 This means war-war to the epi- dermis.
 Up and at lem, girls, and keep your powder dry!
 "New York Girl to Be Bride of Shy Prince" The correspondent does not say how much the prince is shy.
 Fiendish Laughter 'Laugh and grow fat" is a piece of
 advice That leaves me as cold and as cheer
 less as ice. For as I grow fatter and fatter and
 fatter I find that it isn't laughing matter.
 Helen H..
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-11-15

One hundred and seventy dollars interest on a twelve-dollar loan seems almost a clear profit. Short-loan sharks can't blame any of their finan- cial troubles on the recent legislature.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-11-15

"Plan to Move Clarendon Beach. "- Headline.
 In order to function properly, a beach should be kept adjacent to the shore. It is at it's best when leaning on the lake.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-11-15
THE AGE-HERALD

Entered at the Birmingham, Ala, post office as second-class matter under act of Con- gress, March 6, 1873
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-11-15

"Sauerkraut Sales Increase" What has become of Liberty Cab- bage?
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-11-15
Definition

Bandit Queen-Any flapper wh happens to get pinched.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-11-15

product.
The Washington times., 1923-04-03
INU. 5. s WEEKS,
BOY TURNS
BURGLAR
Danzig stcWaway, Linguist at
13, Caught RifIing Aboard
Freighter.

NEW YORK, April "A story of
youthful adventure, as colorful and
eventful as l the most romantic Of
fiction "thriliers,'' was told at the
Fourth avenue police court, Brook
lyn, by John zavel, thirteen years
old, native of the Free State of
Danzig. He had been arrested for
burglary on board the freighter
Eastern Guide, anchored at the foot
Of Forty-fifth street, Brooklyn.
Detectives were called by the
first mate OF the vessel, who de-
clared that the boy had been dis
covered ransaching his cabin and
had stolen SIG from his clothes.
When arrested, the boy was clad
in new attire. He said that he had
come to America six weeks ago
from Danzig as stowaway on the
White Star liner Cedric. Since
then he has been sleeping in hall.
ways. alleys and aboard vessels at
the docks. The boy. Is an accom-
plished linguist. He conversed
with an interpreter nuently in
Polish, italian, Russian and Ger
man. His father, he said, had been
an officer in the Russian army, but
had been killed in the war. After
ward his mother died. Then he
ran away from home to seek his
fortune. :
He will be held, pending word
from Federal authorities.
The Washington times., 1923-04-03
ADDED
To JOHN D. s
FORTUNE
Holdings in Oil Companies IN
creased by Dividends and
Appreciation Of Shares.
BY CosrnopoIltan News service.

NEW YORK, April s.--John D.
Rockefeller's one-sixth holdings in
nine Standard Oil Company Sub.
salaries have increased in value
$1O4,201, 600 within the past year,
owing to declaration Of stock divi'
dends and market appreciation 81
his shares, tabulation showed to.
day. a previous tAbulation showed
his income from his holdings totaied
roughly $4,000, 900 last year, be
fore paying Federal taxes.
The complication brings out the
fact that the market appreciation
in his holdings added more than
eight times the amount to his
wealth than did the dividend In
come. The chief apprecition In
value was In Standard OIL Of New
York, where in his 24.9 per cent OF
all outstanding stock OF that COM
pany went up In value $37, 92S, 600.
The second largest appreciation Was
in Standard OIL Of California, where
in his 23.4 per cent holdings adj
vanced in value by s16,989, 600.
Other increases were:
The Washington times., 1923-04-03
PARTED
WITH BRIDE
ISREPORT
London Newspaper Repeats
Charges That Wilhelm and
Flernine Quarreled.
a. Trtarnational News service.

LONDON. April S.--The York
shire Evening Post. which recently
printed q dispatch from Doom
saving the former Kaiser had
o1Iarreled with his new bride,
princess Hermine, and that they
had separated, repeated the DECLARE
ton today. According to this news
paper (relying upon its Doom cor.
respondent, the present sepafa-
ton OF the couple IL probably
AZ pIspatches from other sources
said. that the wife OF the former
German war lord had gone to her
ancestral home In SiIesia to spend
Easter with her children by her
first marriage.
The Doom correspondent Of the
Yorkshire Evening Post maintains
that the couple Quarreled for some
reason or other and that Herynifle,
being q woman Of strong Win,
decided to leave her Spouse. He
claims that the break took place
some time ago, but was kept
secret from the German royalists
for fear It would embarrass the
monarcnist organizers, who are now
According to the Yorkshire Post
correspondeYit, the former German
emperor was unable to get on
friendly terms with the children
that his second wife had by her
former marriage, and that his own
children, BY his first wife, have
become more or less estranged to
him by reason of his second
matrimonial venture.
The Washington times., 1923-04-03
Tony's Nag Sure Of Sugar and His Job
While He Can Navigate.

! more proud when he sidesteps
past the judges stand than
TOny's nag when he sidesteps
past . truck you are badly mis-
taken.
On the Fourth Of July Tony's
nag is dressed up like General
Pershmg's favOrite steed.
He has flags to the left OF
him and flags to the right Of
him; red white and blue hunt
ing envelopes him like q parade
stand. And that old horse holds
his head uU just like he knows
what it's all about. What IL his
legs are Tnisfits and his hind
part seems q bit lOppy and his
neck wObbIes? His coat shines
like lacquer, and he's scrubbed
and cOmbed and polished. Even
his hOOfs are sIlined up like b
pair Of patent leather pumps.
HAS STEADY RATIONS.
TOny's nag may not show much
class as horses go, but he don't
show any ribs, either.
He looks as if his bucket Of
fresh water and bag OF oats are
as sure as cIOclxWOrh, and ON
ordinary days when there isn't
any special scheme or tribute to
be carried out In his decorations.
he gall0ps down the street with
q bunch Of roses between his
ears or . little bell on his har-
ness.
Under his collar Is soft pad,
and over him is q blanket when
it's cold, and I actually believe
that Tony would have an electric
fan for him In the summer II he
could ever figure out Just how
he could arrange it.
Tony and his horse always ret
a smile of admiration wherever
they go and the nag always
looks happy and content. 1 stOp
and give the nag q lump Of sugar
sometimes, and he always smiles
when he crunches It..
III the time ever comes when
Tony's pal kicks off for the fields
Of clover, where good horses 20
when they die, and Tony drives
q truck like his other pals. TII
bet he talks 70 It just out 81
He'll probably yen .Whoap,
in that good natua,ed, musical
voice Of his when he throws on
the brakes and s'Giddap!'' when
ne steps on the gas. And he'll
have roses on the radiator.
Bless his heart!
The Washington times., 1923-04-03
lNcRoWN TOE NAIL
TURNS OUT ITSELF

A noted authority says that a few
drops Of "Outgro' upon the skin
surrounding the ingrowing nail re-
duces inflammation and pain and so
toughens the tender, sensitive skin
underneath the toe nail, that it can
not penetrate the flesh, and the
nail turns naturally outward almost
over night.
ssOutgro" is q harmless, antisep-
tic manufactured for chiropodists.
However, anyone can buy from the
drug store tiny bottle containing
directions.