davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1923-05-26
A MAIDS MAXIMS

By the time a clever girl has at
tracted the attention OF the right
man, inspired him to date her
up" arranged for him to see her
alone, shown him off to the fam
lily, kept the family from showing
off to him, sympathized with him.
allowed him to dominate her.
scared off all the other men-ex-
cept one runner-up-by that time.
if anybody asks her whether girls
should propose, she feels like an
swering, Cant man do even that
for himself?"
"All husbands do this sooner or
later" the Italian author remarked
the other day when he shot his
wife. Like so many other insti-I-
tions. that of con1ugal sharp
shooting seems to hayo been fem
inized in America.
A problem of married life Is de-
Gliding whether ones nice husband
looks worse when he needs n
shave than when he needs hair
cut, or vice versa.
According to the headlines, the
Chicago divorce rate has doubled
in ten years. There ought. thinks
the cynical New York wife. to be
some compensation for living In
Chicago!
Modern marriage Is conducted
by the method of trial and error;
the divorce Judge decides which Of
each couple is in error, or which
is a trial.
A heart caught on the rebound
is like a hot liner-awfully hard to
hold.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1923-05-26
A Needful Reform

(Talladega Daily Home)
AS soon as commencement are
over, if it be now too late. let
every school and school district in
the state at once see that there
are extra stairs. fire extinsuish-
ers and fire escapes added to all
school buildings. To all buildings
would be better; but surely to the
school buildings. where young life
Is intrusted. No matter about
trouble and expense; no matter II
some one did once say they were
fire proof" and perfectly safe.
take no chances but see that they
are safe. Let's never permit the
South Carolina case. where 90
school children were burned up to
be repeated or approached II Ala
bama.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1923-05-26
GROUPING THE RAILROADS

1t is quite true that "this country
was developed in industry, in agricul
ture and in every pursuit of bushes;
through the full play of incentive anc
initiative" as is remarked by S. Davis
Warfield, president of the Seaboard
Air Line. Mr.. Warfield makes this
statement in course of an argument
opposing the plan Of the government
for enforced merger of the railroad
of the country into suggested groups
Going a little further than Mr.. War
field it might be said that develop
ment of this country began with the
axe and the rifle of early settlers, and
that the inland portion Of America was
opened for development through the
personal prowess of Indian fighters.
This reasoning does not, however, ex-
tend to a complicated system of gov
eminent, commerce and transporta-
ton such as has developed through the
continuous application of American
invention and initiative.
The railroad transportation of the
country is not village affair, not a
state affair, but nationwide. The rail-
road is as much a continuity of serv-
ice through connection of different
lines as the postoffice department is.
With the many systems now maintain
ing traffic relations with one another,
each seeks as much profit out of
its haulage as it is possible for it to
secure. Each has its separate man.
agement and overhead to maintain
and each is after maximum Of revenue
The shipper pays larger bill where
two railroad systems handle a COM
modify than he would pay the one
railroad system handling the commod-
ity the entire distance. Merger of a
number of lines serving the same
grand divisions of the country would
be the means of eliminating mass of
local freight rates and divisions of
rates, and the merged system could
handle the same business at less cost
than when several operated.
The principal objection to CONSOLE
dation comes from the railroads. The
Illinois Central does not wish to con-
solidate with the Seaboard Air Line,
although the Seaboard is a natural
connection for the Illinois CentraPs
eastbound traffic. The Seaboard is
a weak road compared with the ILL
nois Central. and that is probably why
the latter may not care to be troubled
with it. The New York Central claims
it should be under the Baltimore and
Ohio grouping.
It IS obvious that the railroads could
not agree among themselves in the
matter of grouping, and that this allo-
cation must be done by the govern
ment if done at all. What the gov
eminent. is aiming at is simplification
of a great necessary public service,
and the group plan has much to recon-
mend it in that quarter. Although I'M
der separate arrangements, the rail-
road lines as matter Of fact are one
line in point of serving the nation,
hence the nation has right so to reg
ulate that service through groupings
or otherwise as will render it most
simple, most uniform and most eco
nomic.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1923-05-26
MOTHERS OF FAMOUS
MEN

The Mother OF James Watt
One Of the loveliest relationships
ever existing between mother and
son was that between James Watt,
scientist and inventor of the mod
ern steam engine, and his mother,
Agnes Muirhead Watt. In this
case 1t was not SO much the fact
that there was similarly of
mental qualities. as that there was
a strong spiritual tie between
them.
In the first place. James Watt
as child. was fragile and deli
cate Of health. There was this
that bound him closer to his
mother than most boys are bound:
he needed her more, and she was
the embodiment of unseifishness
and devotion. OF gentle birth and
good education. she supervised his
early education. as he was not
strong enough to go to q regular
school.
Another thing. James was the
only surviving child of brood Of
five. which made him dearer even
than he would have been in hap
pier circumstances. All the mother
love for the five was poured into
the life of this one child. who re-
sponded to it with all his
thoughts.
Mrs. Watt was a. woman Of
splendid character, esteemed by
family. friends and neighbors
alike. She was kind. noble and
charitable. She had many graces
or person, being comedy of face
and figure, with a gentle and
sweet manner. Her mind was I'M
usually keen and well developed,
and although she was an excellent
housekeeper. she did not allow the
events of the world to slip by
her unnoticed. She combined all
the virtues OF mind, heart and dis
position. Writing of her, a COM
mentator says:
Mrs. Watt was not less distin-
euished for her sound sense and
kind deeds than she was for her
cheerful temper and good man
ners."
She was evidently a woman of
some perception as well, for she
noticed when her son was hardly
more than a baby that he showed
an inclination for drawing. This
she encouraged in him, and thus
helped to develop his engineering
instinct. Her devotion to him was
amply rewarded, for she said in
later life that the loss of her only
daughter was fully repaid by the
dutiful attention of her son.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1923-05-26
ONE TRICK A DAY

Find Total of q Sum Of Figures
A number Is written on a piece
of paper which is folded and given
to someone to hold. Various per-
sons then write down numbers be-
tween one and ten on another
sheet of paper Anyone's initials
are written on this sheet for iden-
tification. and the figures are add
ed up and found to equal the I'M
known number written on the
folded slip.
Suppose the number the per-
former wrote on the slip was So.
He watches the figures that the
spectators are writing and when
their total reaches q or more
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1923-05-26
PEOPLES FORUM


To the Editor of The Age-Herald:
The people of Florence and in
this section are very highly appre-
ciative of the excellent publicity
which The Age-Herald has given
with reference to the application
of the Alabama Power company to
build a transmission line into this
district. We feel that The Age
Herald has performed a real and
unselfish public service. and We
want to let you know that we ap-
preciate it. II. A. BRADSHAW.
Florence. Ala, May %, 1928.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1923-05-26
SMILES


Some English sailors went
ashore and for a change thought
they would like to go riding on
They went to the near
est livery stable and the spokes-
man asked for the hostler.
Spokesman: I'VE want a 'orse."
Hostler: What kind of 'orse?"
Spokesman: I'VE want four
legged 'orse."
Hostler (annoyed): YES. know
that. but dyer want a quiet 'orse
or spirity 'orse?"
Spokesman: "Oh. 1t don't matter
about that, mate. Give US pretty
long 'orse: there's eight Of US and
we're all goln' aboard"
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1923-05-26
Way To Whip the Weev1l
(Gadsden Journal)

The bankers have been respon-
sible, perhaps, as much as any
one factor. for the predominance
Of cotton with the Southern farm
err. Cotton has been the only farm
product on which he could secure
loan. 1t has been the one me-
dunn of farm exchange. The
farmer who is not independent
has been almost forced to grow
cotton. whether he desired to or
not. If banks of Alabama would
make advances on dairy products.
eggs and chickens and hogs. as
they do on cotton, it would not
take long. we believe. to whip the
boil weevil by starving him out.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1923-05-26
10 FAvORITE BOOKS

As Chosen by Harry Kemp. Poet.
Savage Races of the World"
Adventure in Africa" (Stanley).
Keats poems. =
Shelley's poems.
"Ardath" (CorellO.
Blake's poems.
The sStory OF Mary sMaeLane"
(MacLane).
Marie Baskirtseff's Diary"
Chapman's Homer.
Copyright by American News
paper Alliance.)
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1923-05-26

Nothing PERSONAL. OF Course
(Houston Post)
He: isn't 1t beautiful down here
by the ocean? Really much low
lier now that all the summer
guests are gone"
She: Yes: I can't understand
why everybody doesn't come now
when there's no one here"
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1923-05-26

Chicago Journal of Commerce)
Senator Moses of New Hamp-
shire, two months abroad, has
found Europe a bed of intense
hatred of the United States, and
consequently not one the United
States could comfortably lie
down in,
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1923-05-26

The only argument for the con-
Wet lease system Is that 1t brings
money into the state treasury and
the money Is needed. No other has
been offered for selling the labor
Of the states wards to private
concerns. Can the state of Ala
bama afford to commit a moral
wrong for the sake of revenue?
Other states have found ways to
make the labor of their convicts
productive, without resorting to
bondage. Alabama can do the
same.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1923-05-26

(GadSden Times-NeWs)
The council has decided to give
an Increase of $40 per month to
the firemen and a like increase to
the members Of the police force.
1t took that body a long while to
decide to do it. but finally they
have. realized that an employe Of
the city is entitled to fair living
wage as well as other people.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1923-05-26

(Memphis Commercial AppeaD
The wife of the new British pre-
mier says he would much rather
spend his days at their home rais-
ing pigs. In other words, he pre-
fers the grunt of appreciation to
the growl Of dissatisfaction.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1923-05-26

(Which is within of 36) he takes
the slip and asks for someone's
initials. AS he writes the initials
on the paper he secretly adds the
missing number at the bottom of
the column, and thus brings the
total to SO.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1923-05-26
THE ALABAMA PRESS


The sky line. believe us. Is Just
little way off, and the time Is
not far distant when not
only tho. sky line but the increased
number of smokestacks in and
about Greater Huntsville will
make of this a metropolitan CEN
ter that will make both the state
and the South proud OF this sec
ton.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1923-05-26
Need To Wake Up

(IallapOOSa News)
We need something in Camp Hill
that will wake us up. Something
that will jar us into greater life
and activity. We are by no means
dead. We are not even sleeping.
We are stepping forward at a pace
that Is commendable when COM
pared with the progress Of other
communities. But that isn't
enough. We ought to step faster,
take longer strides and get there
sooner.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1923-05-26

New York Evening World)
. The retirement of Bonar Law
means the loss of one of the best
of statesmen. Which reminds us
that though England has but
limited number of laws. most of
them are good ones.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1923-05-26

VMOHtBOmery JOurnaIJ
Road improvement cannot fail 70
bring more business to a town.
The day has passed when the
farmers are willing to travel over
roads which are almost impass-
able. Distance means little now.
The people who show the greatest
interest in the maintenance Of the
roads are the ones who obtain the
business of the farmers. even
though the farmers are forced to
travel moro miles in getting %
their markets.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1923-05-26
THE PARAGRAPHERS
Eliminating Himself

Senator Borah says the presi-
dent will be renominated. but on
an alright platform. Then Sena-
tor Borah will not be on the plat
form.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1923-05-26
The Example of Words
NASHVILLE Banner)

AS an excellent example of
words which mean more than
meets the eye, consider President
Harding's telling Senator Moses.
II should think you would have
sore throat"
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1923-05-26
There Was = Reason

There Was = Reason
Guelph Evening Mercury
did your wife go. for you when
you got home late last night?"
No; for once 1 was in luck. Tho
people in the flat next door were
having a spat and my wife was
busy listening"
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1923-05-26
A Gloomy View

(Guntersville Democracy
We always thought politicians
were elected to enforce the will of
the people. The impression seems
to be abroad that they think"
they have been elected to enforce
their will ION the people."-Shef-
field Standard. 1t Is a theory of
democratic government, national.
state and county, that we elect
men to serve the people without
discrimination. In practice it
amounts to the people be id"
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1923-05-26

that are held up. Contractors, ma
terial men and operatives in the build
ing trades face the equal alternative
of reasonable charges for construction
or seeing it take real slump. Con-
servatism has figured more conspicu-
ously in American industry during the
process of recovery than ever before
in its history. The first slip-up has
been in the building trades. Prompt
abatement of prices will rehabili-
tate structural operations. Indications
point to that abatement. The lesson
of 1920 is not easily put out of mind.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1923-05-26

= (AtIantal COnStltutlOnJ
The statement that the Congress
sional Record has been issued
since 1893 shows that our ances-
tors had their troubles, too.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1923-05-26

The difference between preaching
and practicing is illustrated by ex-
IRENE 'isolationists" who talk that sort
of thing, then spend months stalking
over Europe.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1923-05-26
A Gentle Hint

michigan Gargoyle)
He: Does the moon affect the
tide?"
She: mo, only the united"
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1923-05-26

One Better
Life)z
my daughter did the whole
course in only three years"
That's nothing; my son did 1t
in three sets of tires"
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1923-05-26

A large percentage of the European
dogs Of war appear to need muzzles.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1923-05-26
Why, Josephine!

Why, Josephine!
A thing of beauty, sight that's great,
Is glimpse of Josephine trying to
skate.
With her trusty rollers on her feet,
Believe me, kid, that girl is neat.
She has some trouble with her skates,
But that's because her feet aren't
mates.
Say, down the sidewalk she will fly
While the houses seem to hustle BY.
She takes a breath, then puts on
steam
Pedestrians jump from her path and
scream.
It's not a cyclone-oh, no, not that
Just Josephine trying to lose some fat.
B. V. D.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1923-05-26

To a Light Love
Why don't you go back to the old
loves, my dear?
am not the one that will hold you.
Light hearts are the lovers you really
love;
Let theirs be the arms that enfold
you.
But if you go back to the old loves,
my dear,
I shall miss you-yes, can you
doubt it?
But true hearts have lived through
worse than that,
So why should we worry about it?
-Snooper.
Gradually the Near East is return
ing to normally. Greece and Turkey
are on the verge Of another rough
house, and all's well.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1923-05-26
Snitten

Smitten
o, was smitten by maid,
And l was smitten sore;
AS l was walking in the shade,
o, was smitten by maid
She drove a golf ball down the glade
And didn't holler "Forew
"Song Booster in Cell" He was
pinched, however, for robbery-not,
as you may have hoped, for song
boosting.
We don't take much stock in all this
talk about Willard being too old to
fight. Look at Everett True!
We note that the Alabama Power
company made net earning of over
quarter of million during April. We
do hope the company will pull through.
Why is it that nearly every time it
rains the power goes off? Is it because
the power company is powerless?
One word from the Partisan dress
mongers and the damsel of divine slen-
derness Immediately becomes skinny.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1923-05-26

The Easiest Way
Dear Torch Bearer: I see by the
papers where lady paid two thou
sand dollars for a money-making ma
chine that wouldn't work. That's
nothing. l married one.-H. r.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1923-05-26
I0R$S:}AlbEARER.
Memoirs of a Movie Vamp
BY Nine. Ilacka Frame

Editors Note: You may have
missed the preceding chapters. If you
did, what of it? Now go on with the
story.)
About some of my fellow artists
Mary Pickford is rather good, but SC
very bold, don't you think? / cannot
understand why she should cater to
the cruder instincts of man by at
tempting the portrayal Of Innocence
She should have seen my Passions
DESIRE" then she would have learned
how an artistic artistes.
Jackie Coogan should shave more
carefully before he attempts childish
roles. Just between you and l, Jackie
is ninety-two years old and a grand
father. Nobody discovered this but
little me. l saw through his make
up and estimated with my customary
accuracy his correct age.
You have no doubt read Of the fire.
quency with which I appear at char
table affairs. I am naturally unself-
ish, and l believe it makes one feel
SO much better to give unhesitatingly
to those beneath us. Ny flat charge
for each appearance at these affairs
is one thousand dollars, but once 1
didn't get it, nor did l insist. 1t was
for the starving children of the tene-
ments, and all we took in was $64S. SO.
1 did not complain. My sympathy
was aroused and so took seas. SO in
full payment.
And so you will see that fame has
not changed me. I am still the pure
and simple little girl. My manager
says he couldn't vouch for the first
adjective, but all my friends will for
the second-he is the funniest man.
Yes, I am charitable; come by it
naturally. Once I gave starving beg
gar my glove Sin Nix.
Ito be continued.)
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1923-05-26

One of the peculiarities Of the derby
is that so many persons knew Zev
would win, and so few bet on him.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1923-05-26
THE AGE-HERALD

Entered at the Birmingham. Ala, postoffice -
March 6, 1879.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1923-05-26
Why is It that nearly every time it

ny 10 ~ Uf1esV HiO|HKJ WV e114fO t
rains the power goes off? Is it becaus
the power company is powerless?
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1923-12-29
YOUNG MOODS KILLING

my life a shoestring and ends up rich
~ attracts attention.
When a boy a shoestring into approximately
100000 little than year. he creates sensation.
That exactly the 26year-old Lieut. Osborne Wood
son and aid Leonard Wood of the Philippines has
done bucking Wall Street he says from far-of Manila
The unfortunate part of his good fortune however that
something his father administration in
islands, already subject of considerable criticism both
Congress and among the FilpinOs
Among things young Wood admits he made
Philippines exchange This despite the fact that his father the
governor of the Philippines aid his father
technically this may be- is nevertheless
extremely practice officials attaches of
high officials speculate in the described
That Secretary of War Weeks himself former Wall Street
broker thought plain for he learned OF
young Woods activities, he ordered them stopped.
incidentally and thereto appertanng appears that Gen
Wood did know what going in his Office
til informed from Washington
cables from Manila quote General Wood correctly
put stop his sons pecuaons he learned of
And Secretary Weeks says he himself the order
operations cease
Which naturally does rebound exactly to General
say the least it, appears Secretary Weeks
Washington found what going General Woods
other side of the world from Washington
before the general himself.
be hoped the resolution of Representative James A
Repubcan of Wisconsin, asking for investigation of
administration of the Philippines is favoraby acted
upon will be best for General Wood and all concerned
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1923-12-29
RELIGIOUS STUDENTS SESSIONS

INDIANAPOLIS today is the center Of church thought Of
America. Several thousand students invading the
dedication Of their lives Christianity
sages kick their heels in controversy science
religions and multitude of subjects church mem
only himbeu about then youth is indeed hilarious
in its enthusiasm.
The fact that from practically every
State from foreign countries proof enough
seems the startling in its posi-
biities and its present momentum.
The Amerca-wh its millions of uneducated and
unassmaed immigrants its city tenements its factory prob
lens districts in Kentucky and Tennessee and
church that rapidly becoming stagnanhese at
tracing attention Of the student volunteer.
Religion begin home, Aonzo Ray Petty pastor of
Memorial Baptist Church, New York City, told stu
at a preliminary session here.
Our great Christian battle is not only to give the people
of India and China the Gospel but also
to many millions who know nothing of its meaning
pications