Evening star., 1923-03-11

There is something about an auto
mobile show that seems to intoxicate
the prospective car buyer and shift
his mind from above his collar to
below his shoetops. Isn't she a
great show you'll exclaim enthu-
siastically.
\ great show is right! But it's a
safe bet you haven't seen the star
act, It's little off the beaten track.
slightly to the left of the main
breezeway Of Lizzies de luxe. And
you're the loser if you miss 1t.
Ten steps to the left and then back
a pace or two to booth you haven't
noticed before. THE show as 1t
foot sign in red letters. "A friendly
take-off on the chatter you iall for
at the show. Step in for a demon
stratien. then go back and select
your new car intelligently," says a
second line.
Take I'm Sideshow.
Novel? Well say so. And perhaps
enlightening, for this business of
picking the wrong car is a mix-up
which spares neither the buyer nor
the dealer. We slipped: we know.
So let's take in the sideshow and see
what's what
Case-hardened camshafts. It's
polouS oIl SclliuS cars. hllluIS
meant. and all that. Even some OF
the statesmen are discovered taking
it in. But it's hot stuff
Just look, There's d prospective
purchaser getting the typical talk
from snappy salesman. Plug in on
Gas mileaGe?" roars the snappy
salesman. "Ye gods. my friend, this
boat wins every economy run from
The pebbles of the Pacific to the giz-
Zard or the gulf stream. Mileage?
Don't make me laugh! Why there
out the mileage Of this wagon"
Master Mind Takes Charxe.
Here the master mind of the parody
axes the prospective purchaser aside
ana inStructS him to upset the usual
order OF things by asking:
but what guarantee do You give
hat ! will be able to Obtain s,ch
mileageY
Suddenly carefully timed curtain
lowers upon the snappy salesman and
RISES again 70 reveal a sensible sales-
man; who volunteers to tell the
You'll not have the luck with
mileage that we have" he says. Our
economy runs are done under the most
favorable conditions. with tires i'm
nated to a point which would be in
iuri0os ier ,s,n 70 the ,ca car If done as a regu-
where they can coast the most, and
they've got the business Of running
TIE motor economically down to a
science. You haven't got time for
Slch details, and it would hardly pay
You anyway. Our economy runs were
made just TO show what the car would
do" by way Of mileage If the owner
iried; but though the average for the
tests was around twenty-three miles
per gallon. I'd much rather sell you
be car with the understanding that
ne best You are likely to do is if-
teen
Snappy Salesman Comes Back.
The curtain blots out the speaker
and, upon rising again, reveals the
snappy salesman geared higher than
ever.
TN tell you, my friend, this is the
most economical little chariot on rub
Der tires today"
,as The master .a mind of ceremonies
ask: But after I've had it a year
ard look back over the repair bills,
Will call 1t an economical car then %
The sensible salesman takes the
stand and tells more truth.
ANY car with such low first cost
Is bound to run high in replacement
figures. 1t is the law of common
sense: namely, that you can't get
:. cheap proposition to start with, and
if you want to get the average serv-
ice from it, you will have to pay for
this service through the replacement
of worn parts and the cost of repair
work. which would be unnecessary on
better made car selling for higher
price. But don't overlook this: If
YOU don't want the average service
from your car-which in these days
of intensified motoring practically
means maximum service-a cheap
car may serve you we'll enough. And
YOU will not be bothered much with
replacements. because you won't use
ir to the usual extent.
Must Use 1t ConAtantIy.
But don't go around telling people
what an economical car 1t is. 1t may
seem economical to you, because you
don't use it enough to discover that
what you save in gas you must pay
for in new parts. And it can't possi-
bly, be an economical car if you don't
use it constantly, because what you
lose through denying yourself maxi
mum use of the car must be checked
off against the saving in gasoline.
IF you tell folkss that this is a
onderfully economical car. the first
thing you know they'll be buying our
product with the idea that they are
going to give it maximum use at your
HR