The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-04-26

lne clty has the street railway in l tight place. The jitneys hurt the util ity's business. Very well, what relia ble guaranties is the utility ready t, give that it will make immediate ser } vice extensions to compensate for tn, loss of the jitneys?
 The commission has no right to sac rlflce the strategic position it now oc. cupies with respect to the utility. Le, the utility proceed at once to a pro. gram looking to complete and we'll. rounded service, or let it confess ina. bility to render such service.
 Let the commission not forget the manner in which the utility has failed to cooperate with the municipal pro- gram for bigger and better Birminp- ham. Let the commission refresh its memory by riding out over those streets that are paved along the curb ing, but which the utility has failed to pave between its tracks, as it is obli- gated to do. '
 In the long eventuality the public welfare must be served. Let the util- lty beware continuance of a policy that does not bear that fact in mind
 Well, they are talking about a r. cent street-car fare. Now we can buy that new automobile we've been look ing at.
 You can ride the street-cars now for cents if you can sneak up on the fellow that has the street-car ticket concession.
 We still believe that ticket-selling campaign would be good street-car merchandising.
 And they call it Marathon danc- 1 ing! When the Grecian warrior in the days of old flatwheeled up and down along the dusty road from the Plain of Marathon, little did he real ie that he was even then evolving a name for shimmy contest.
 Sculptor Taft Picks Diana as Ideal for the Follies."
 Diana was the Goddess of the Chase.
 Explorer to Live Life of Monkey" But why go to the expense of trip to Africa when he can hang on a strap for eight cents?
 We have it from Dr. Parkhurst that dancing contests are stupid. Lissen, Doc-that's why dancing con- tests are popular.
 Another Victim
 This is the maid of Spotless Town, But she has lost her old renown. Her pots and pans. no longer glow, For she has bought radio.
 Checker Game in Wilmette May Prove Fatal" How come there is no law against checkers? The reformers evidently have overlooked bet.
 Texas child shot his father because the said father ordered him to go to school. In some cases it is not neces- sary to teach the young idea to shoot.
 The department of justice is on the trail, and the culprits who have been sticking their fingers in the sugar bowl may be slapped on their collec- tive wrist if they don't watch out. The Lost Ball He drove golf ball in the air; It fell to earth he knew not where.
 Two weeks have went
 And still the gent
 Is searching in the bushes there.
 Jason. You can't tell nowadays whether a girl is spoofing or whether she is se- rious when she says -'I could just die dancing"
 Lots of figures lie, but the clever woman finds way to keep hers from Igetting caught in the act. Il We wouldn't mind those paper luncheon napkins if the walters didn't take such pains to soak them before hand.
 They say Florida is going to abol- ish the county convict lease system. How come? Has somebody been complaining? Alabama is not that way. She stands by her man-drivers, because there's money in it.
 Why just think, the state can make almost thirty cents day each by sell ing men into bOndar'