davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-10-12
AT BREAKFAST

Jim, 1 wish you'd make the
children get up before you leave;
they won't get out of bed until the
house catches fire. You'd better
swap the alarm clock for few
sticks Of dynamite. It's bad enough
to have one cripple in the family
without having both the kids take
after you -
They're getting all these high
hat ideas from going to the movies
so much. If you'd make them stay
home nights and help me with the
washing, maybe you'd have a clean
shirt once in a while. I don't see
how you can give them so much
spending money when I haven't
had any new clothes since the Chi
cago fire. Stop drinking out of
that bowl; you eat like a starved
goldfish on a Sunday school pic
HE
When / was girl, had to help
my mother do things around the
house, but all Maisie thinks of is
her boy friends. And you let her
twist you right around her little
finger. certainly got jellyyfish
when I married you. The only
people I get to talk to are book
agents Don't try to argue
with me-you couldn't convince IN
Eskimo that he shouldn't wear silk
pajamas -"
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-10-12
ADVERTISEMENT.
Happy Now! Chronic
Dyspepsia Gone
Asserts Dare's Menflra Pepsin is Best for
Indigestion, Gas and Acidity, When
Combined with Other Good Invig-
orators and In Ii uld Form
Peoples Drug Stores Guar
antee It and Are Dis
pensing It to Many
Stomach Sufferers.

You can be so distressed with gas
and fullness that you think your
heart is going to stop beating
Your stomach may be so distend-
ed that your breathing is short and
gaspy.
You are dizzy and pray for quick
relief-what's to be done.
Just one dessertspoonfal of Dare's
Mentha Pepsin and in ten minutes
the gas disappears, the pressing on
the heart ceases and you can
breathe deep and naturally.
Obi What blessed relief; but why
not get rid of such attacks aItogeth-
er? Why have chronic indiges-
ton at all?
With this wonderful medicine You
can Danish indigestion or dyspepsia
or any abnormal condition that
keeps the stomach in constant re.
bellion and one bottle will prove it.
And how happy you will be whom
your stomach is as good as new,
Tor then dizziness, nervousness.
sleeplessness, headache and other
ailments caused by a disordered
stomach will disappear and you
Will be your old happy, contented
self again. Peoples Drug Stores
and every regular pharmacist guar
antees a large bottle of Dare's
Mentha Pepsin to show the way to
stomach comfort.
NAnrON
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-10-12
OYSTERS IN
SEASON
A bank cashier in a check suit

A bank cashier in a check suit.
A cut price sale on scissors
A night Waterman who writes
bedtime stories.
A sailor with water on the
knee.
Burning oil stock instead of
coal.
A tailor patching the tire Of
his flivver.
A chorus girl wearing a leg
horn hat.
Cooking a pork chop on q pig
iron stove. \
A cavalry recruit who has
never ridden a horse in his life
riding a horse which has never
been ridden in it's life.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-10-12

OF course you never hear Of
them carrying any girls away, be-
cause they wouldn't have enough
carfare to take them three blocks.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-10-12

Al sidewalk Romeo il . fellow
who stands on the street corners
Just to give the girls . treat.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-10-12
ZOwic!
Sim-If two artists got married,
what would you call it?
Slim-Why, a painters union.

Don't be ashamed to change your
opinions, old chap. Sometimes
they need to be junked-just like
an old suit.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-10-12

They've never seen the Orient
but they sprinkle themselves WitI
Arabian peffume.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-10-12

It's nothing to sec them throw
It's nothing to sec them throw
q paiIful OF sand on street cor
ner, then sit down and imagine
they're on the desert.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-10-12

Customer wish you'd show
me the thinnest thing you have
In a blue serge suit.
Clerk would with pleasure,
sir, but he's out to lunch just
now.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-10-12

Most OF these fellows imagine
they're shesks. and they use the
nearest doorway for astent.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-10-12

! These doorway sheilEs are ex-
pert equestriafls; they learned 4
from riding on merry-go-rOunds.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-10-12

They so horseback riding every
time they get a nickel.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-10-12
Sore Throat or Mouth

You should keep the throat and mouth
clean and healthy. Any disease that
attacks the canal through which must
pass the food we eat, the beverages we
drink and the very air we breathe is a
serious matter. Why neglect Sore Throat
or Sore Mouth when TONSILINE
makes it 80 easy for you to get relief
TONSILINE is especially prepared for
that one purpose. TONSII.INE -
does its full duty-you can |
depend upon it. Keep a bottle
in the house-where you can oct
it quickly when needed. 35c.
and Coo. Hospital Size, 81. loo.
Your druggist sells TONSTIINE.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-10-12

These male sirens used to brusl,
their hair with olive oil, but now
they use lard-it's cheaper.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-10-12

Some Of them get bald and then
save time By painting beautiful
hair comb on their skull.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-10-12

They spend as much time as
possible on this desert until some
one comes along and tells them
to move on.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-10-12

They make a wonderful picture
at night with the moon shining on
their polished hair.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-10-12

This saves them lot Of money
too; they never have to have II
cut.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-10-12
DARE'S
MENTHA PEPSIN
Gland Treatment
Restores r. G. Laws

GlandOgen Provides Simple Method
OF Taking Glandular Treatment.
II am just as young as used TO
be, and it's all due to gland pills.
Here I am 70 and. feel just as spry
and full Of vim and pep as il I
were only 80 or 40" This testi
mony to the virtue Of gland treat
ment was voiced recently by Robert
George Laws, prominent retired
London broker. Mr.. Laws, whose
health has been poor for several
years, claims that a gIandular tonic
put up in tablet form has restored
him to the health and vigor of his
earlier days.
Such treatment - now obtain
able In the form of Glandogen. a
highly concentrated glanduIar tonic.
prepared from the glands of healthy
young animals in convenient tablet
form. Glandbgen has had remark.
able success with. thousands of all
ing men and women.
Giandogen is obtainabIe at all
Peoples Drug Stores.
Mail orders given prompt atten-
ton.
GLANDOGEN
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-10-12

These curbstone Valentines usu-
ally display themselves on the
corners at night after the girls
are through working for the day
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-10-12

III6 KEItsyUL 4lESs u S8N4 - ~ = - 80
walk Romeo to leave town.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-10-12

They'd never present themselves
to any dame until they've made
sure that she has eaten
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-10-12

They're sons Of the desert ald
don't believe in being seen In pub
lie restaurants until all checks
have been paid.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-10-12
Rv Inhn II MedburY.

TWF1E Cleveland police uepar
ment has started a crusade
against malls vamps, and
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-10-12

A chorus girl wearing a leg
horn hat.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-10-12

Cooking pork chop on d pig
iron stove.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-10-12
N ED BUR Y
S A Y S

M II ~ - " ~
S A Y S -
By John p. Medbury.
TVHE Cleveland police depart
ment has started a crusade
against male vamps, and
the mayor has ordered every side
walk Romeo to leave town.
Al sidewalk Romeo il fellow
who stands on the street corners
just to give the girls treat.
Most OF these fellows imagine
they're Shesks. and they use the
nearest doorway for a. tent.
They've never seen the Orient
but they sprinkle themselves Witb
Arabian peffume.
OF course you never hear of
them carrying any girls away. be-
cause they wouldn't have enough
carfare to take them three blocks
These doorway sheilks are ex-
pert equestriafls: they learned 4
from riding on merry-go-rOunds.
They go horseback riding every
time they get nickel.
It's nothing to see them throw
It's nothing to see them throw
q paiIful OF sand on street cor
ner, then sit down and imagine
they're on the desert.
They spend as much time as
possible on this desert until some
one comes along and tells them
to move on.
They make wonderful picture
at night with the moon shining on
their polished hair.
These male sirens used to brush
their hair with olive oil. but now
they use lard-it's cheaper.
Some Of them get bald and then
save time BY painting q beautiful
hair comb on their skull.
This saves them lot Of money
too; they never have to have i
cut
These curbstOne Valentines usu-
ally display themselves on the
corners at night after the girls
are through working for the day
They'd never present themselves
to any dame until they've made
sure that she has eaten.
They're sons Of the desert and
don't believe in being seen In pub
lie restaurants until all checks
have been paid.
They usually enter just in time
to pick up. the walters tip and
put it in their pocket.
But the police department says
they must leave town. The mayor
viii have to furnish the transpOI-
tatiOn, because if they had to pas
their own way not one Of them
could get past the city limits.
Copyright 1928. King Features
Syndicate, Inc.)
Customer wanna buy pair
Of white duck Apants.
Clerk-I'm sorry, sir; we don't
sell animal clothing.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-10-12

Customer wanna buy a pair
Of white duck Apants.
Clerk-I'm sorry. sir; we don't
sell animal clothing. -
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-10-12

They usually enter just in time
to pick up. the walters tip and
put it in their pocket.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-10-12

But the police department says
they must leave town. The mayOr
viii have to furnish the transpOr-
tation, because if they had to pas
their own way not one Of them
could get past the city limits.
Copyright. 1928. King Features
Syndicate, Incl
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-10-12

A tailor patching the tire of
his flivver.
El Mundo. [volume] (San Juan, P.R.) 1919-1990, 1923-06-23
D4fen5yas Mas Pro12eo Les Tome ID
bEas Liger0 Sc ALiOiara

Nos rcfcrfnoa Pastias del para Rinones
Nicnras Id Fgero
6rauos dcicados del
acda dueen frecucnca e paciente da
d. su nicrmedad
LAS CAUSAS: I'll taaio mental las prcocupa-
onesy dgustosi las enerncad yn6rea bajos co de Pos6n
q1eh7ccres c dc
ores; d excessive dc estnuantes cores abaco cafe
demasadO abuse
uvenud des6rdcne5 elo
de
influenza 6ebres eaaina paddca hoda;
dftera enbarazos partos canbio
Intermediates
NoJga
LOS Dolores cintura cadeas;
dc orar do9r ador en- Ia ua aeno ssdmento en- las
mposibIdad incn del
ubos de nal oor de9dad sexual; orinar
tobios;
aldad dc gencrd
apeto neryiosdad; irrtabildad,
FL RFlIEDIO: PASTILLAS del DR. BECKER para Ios
RI3ONES VEJIGA ST sicnte I'd ma dc los atoma
ados debe tomarlas 10 possible B ara las
por agunas Oos las han usado ado3 salactoros
Su precio m6dico rcconiendan
"11sDyas Pr0n0 hgsr0 yjerd9
El Mundo. [volume] (San Juan, P.R.) 1919-1990, 1923-06-23
La inlportante vista pdblica.......

obreros lesionados alrededor de
$4,000, deyolvi6ndosele ademas los
anticipos que habia hecho a sus tra-
bajadores. En- el 1928 Sc le fue a
cobrar las Quotas que nos debia des-
de 1920 Y nos llev6 la Corte por-
que la ley era anti-constitucionaP-
En- cuanto a las Intermediates de
los obreros, dijo que durante los amos
1906 al 1920 Sc reportaron 239 casos
de tuberculosis a causa del tabac0
en- los distintos pueblos tabacaleros
de Ia isla. De esos nlurieron 213,
estan bajo tratamiendo 16, y to-
dos Sc les ha pagado ell tratamiento,
" los parientes de los que han
nuerto Sc les ha pagado su indem-
nizaci6n. agregando que con 80 CEN
t6sin1as de un centavo sobre una no
nina de S1,000,000 como 10 indica el
proyecto IS no Sc puede hacer este.
Present6 una larga lista de patro-
nos cue adeudan sus Quotas la CO.
mission y que tienen presentados 'in-
functions" en- la Corte Federal; y
termin6 diciendo cue la situacion es
Que un gran ndmero de corporacio-
/ mes no pagan a Ia Comision, impo-
sibilitandola de hacer 10 que la ac-
tual ley VICENTE especihcamente lie
ordena en- bien de los miles de tra-
bajadores que representa- la vida
productiya dc Puerto Rico.
AL terminar el Sr. Rivera Marti-
nez. que rebat6 todos los puntos du-
dosos de la nueva ley propuesta, Sc
suspendi6 el hearing para anoche
q las $3.50.
El Mundo. [volume] (San Juan, P.R.) 1919-1990, 1923-06-23
Antonio OTERO Y ARCE,
Pres. Junta Central.
LA sITUACIoN DE LOS DIvERsos
NRGOCIos EN- E. U.

Inforlne concise recibido por cable
del National City Bank, Nueva York,
con relaci6n Ia situacion actual de
los negocios en- los Estados Unidos.
DINERo A LA VISTA 59o
ACCIoNEs: Ell mercado Sc mostro
con mejor tono aver despues de una
semana de fuertes liqmdaciones.
PRODUCTos De PRIDGBRA NE
cEsIDAD; mercado en- general ha
estado pesado duranqe Ia ultima Sc
mana.
AzUCAR: Ell mercado Sc Ia mos
trado algo fuerte durante los iltimos
dos dias cerrando aver 51a centavos.
El Mundo. [volume] (San Juan, P.R.) 1919-1990, 1923-06-23
MERCADo DE AZUcAR
w. G. MARVIN.

Gable recibido por Lanborn g. Co,
San Juan, de su oficina de N. Y.
N. Y. jueves 81. .NTercado continta
fuerte con tendencia a alza. vENTAS:
10000 sacos azdcares de Cuba para en-
barque en- JUNO liz (7.28 P. R)
a la Warner Sugar Refining Co, N. ";
$4,000 sacos de Fiipinas para llegar
en- la primera quincena de Julio 2
(7.2s P. R.) a la American Sugar Re
fining Co., N. Y. Al cerrarse Ell merca-
do habia cantidades linitadas de Fill
pinas obtenibles para entregar en- jul
lilo a 5-5l8 (7.41 P .R.) y de Cuba pa
ra embarque en- JUNO, julio Is 5-3I4
0.53 P. r.. Los refnadores intere-
saban azicares de Cuba sig G.28
P. R-) REFTNADA: Federal Sugar Re
inning Co, $50 La demanda por azii-
car rehnada continda activa.
El Mundo. [volume] (San Juan, P.R.) 1919-1990, 1923-06-23
INGLATERRA NO HA LAMA
DO UN RETO A LOS EE, UU.

LoNDREs, JUNO %. Omitted Press)
Sc ha conhrmado que no ha sido la
intenci6n del gobierno de la Gran Bre-
tana lamar un reto las autoridades
emericanas al senar todos los licores
a bordo dc sus barcos.
El Mundo. [volume] (San Juan, P.R.) 1919-1990, 1923-06-23
MARL EN- EsTADO DE sTTIo

BERLIN, junio %. Omitted Press).-
Los belgas han declarado 10 ciudad de
Mari en- estado de sitio por haber 81
do muertos dos soldados belgas.
El Mundo. [volume] (San Juan, P.R.) 1919-1990, 1923-06-23
UN TELEGRAMA

fIonorables Prcsidentes Camara
Senado dc Puerto Rico,
San Juan.
Protestamos gran error reforma
plan ensenanza seis amos castellano
exclusives. Inmensa mayoria ninos
puertorriquenos necesitan trabajar
edad temprana siendo altamente per-
iudicados deseonocimiento idioma in
giles.
Por las Asociaciones de Padres,
de Ponce,
Antonio 0TERO Y ARCE,
Pres. Junta Central.
Luis Y. Maldonado, Felipe Alvira,
America Danielsen, Alfonso Colomer,
Carlos Pattenrne Jr., Leonardo Pa
checo. Luciano Monrino, Andres Co
razon, Sra Monsanto de Diaz, To-
mas Armstrong.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-12-18
HELP SCHOOL CHILD
By EMIL1E HOFFMAN

Much of the strain found among school children night have been averted by careful home precautions.
 Never let child lay the book on the table when studying or reading. Teach him to hold the book at dis tance of from 12 to IA inches from the eyes.
 Do not permit children to face either the sunlight or artificial light while reading. The light should come frmo over the left shoulder If they use the table for preparing the writ ten home work do not place the lamp in the middle of the table unless it is one of the indirect type. Set 1t to the left side. There should never be a direct light in the eyes. If, for any reason, this Is unavoidable, have the child wear light shade over the eyes if he must write in the evening. Do not allow the child to read in a lying position nor slouched down in a comfy chair. Always insist upon an erect position in writing as we'll as studying.
 It seems hardly necessary to ad- monish against reading in the wan ing daylight. Yet, how many abuse their eyes shamefully by straining them to the utmost at such times. Wise mothers will never permit their children to do this.
 Physicians say it is injurious to the eyes to study or read before break fast, but not many omthers have this diGGioulty to cope with.
 Mothers should impress upon chil- dren the great necessity of careful ly guarding the eyes, and a con stant vigilance on the part of the mother during the early school years will make the child realize the grave danger of overtaxtng the eyes
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-12-18
CHRISTMAS SALAD

The pimento cups are ideal for serving the Christmas salad. These can be purchased in cans. Those containing six pimentos are the size required for salad receptacles. Drain the pimentos, fill them with Waldorf salad and in center stick a strip of green pepper or an olive. Either will carry out the red and green Christmas coloring. A salad overlaid with stips of green pepper could be substituted and if preferred the pimento can be served on bed of shredded lettuce or watercress.
 A salad of white grapes Is another suggestion. Remove seeds and in- , sert half a pecan nut meat. Make the dressing of lemon juice, oil and salt. Cream cheese mixed with chopped parsley or chives and rolled into small balls Is nice served with this salad.
 Stuffed figs and dates make appe- tiztng accompaniments to salads. Make an incision in the figs and stuff with following mixture: With a wooden spoon mash cream cheese un- til 1t is creamy; moisten with heavy cream and season with salt and pap rika. Remove the stones from datea and fill the cavities with cream cheese mixed with chopped English walnut meats.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-12-18
DOMESTIC DAYS
By ROY L. MCARDELL

"A letter came to the office to- day from Uncle Henry" said MT. Jarr, as he passed his wife his salary.
 "Yes, and I got one from Aunt Hetty," replied Mrs. Jarr, who never failed to meet her husband with a kiss at the door-salary nights.
 eve don't need to answer till after Christmas" suggested MT. Jarr.
 Let me see Uncle Henrys let ter" said Mrs. Jarr. There's some thing up or the two wouldn't have written at about the same time. Aunt Hetty said she would have sent us a turkey only the weather is so warm for this time of the year she was afraid a dressed one would spoil, and she says she knows we'd have no place to keep or kill a live turkey in a city apartment"
 "Yes, and last year they wrote they couldn't send us a turkey be- cause the weather was so severe they were frozen in at the farm," re- piled MT. Jarr. T think it would pay us to pass these tightwad rela- lives up. They visit us free of cost and they expect us to pay as summer boarders They write and ask us outright for anything they vast, and then they write and tell us the things they can't send us from the farm and the reason why they can'v send them before we hint we want them"
 Well, what did Uncle Henry say in his letter." inquired Mrs. Jarr. Maybe you should write him nice reply. The children want walnuts and chestnuts for Christmas, and as the parcel post goes everywhere we
 The trouble about the parcel post is that it will take everything but bring so little" interrupted Mr Jarr, especially where country relatives are concerned. Well. I'll write Uncle Henry nice letter. I've got time before dinner, haven't I?"
 "Let me see it!' said Mrs. Jarr, coming in just as MT. Jarr was clos ing the envelope.
 Hum! All well and happy. Merry Christmas and Prosperous New Year. All goes well. Trying to save a little money '"--and then Mrs. Jarr deliberately tore the letter into bits.
 Never send such a letter to a relative, rich or poor!' said Mrs Jarr Here, sit down and tell them I've been very sick; that little Emma doesn't seem strong; that our Willie
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-12-18
CHAPTER 8

zs T did not mean to let the cat out
 of the bag" Dixon apologized to .s- Marian.
 .'sf "oh. that's all right" with a
 shrug. There's been an awful lot
 of talk about a very small matter
 T wish" Lois soft voice broke in upon the conversation, that had
 Known you did that kind of thing In , public, Marian. l would have been { glad to get you to help us in the s little entertainment we gave recent 2 ply for our Ladies Guild"
 s My dear Miss Lois!'' George e Dixon protested. Would you have -a dancing number in your church ,,.parlors? I doubt if 1t would be al- lowed-at least such dancing as your sister does. It is wonderful-but not -well--not the kind of thing one would give for a church show "oh-I did not understand that" q Lois murmured. Excuse mel sq There was an awkward silence. James Horton proposed that the cof- -afee be brought in. Marian turned to the minister and began to talk to him about various folk-dances she s had seen.
 . They are most interesting" she . observed, all frivolty gone from her &ernanner. Have you ever seen any? 60, "Yes," he admitted. When l was at college a lot of us fellows went to some folk dances given in New 'York. They were, as you say very T interesting"
 His host caught eagerly at this statement.
 And rather dignified, too-are they not? At least I have heard SOY" ie "Yes," the minister declared. Some -{of them are almost as stately as the Aoid- fas shioned minuet. Others, are less so.'
 Lois turned her calm blue eyes elupon her left-hand neighbor Are the dances that Marian does like those?" she asked tnnocentiy' q mean--are they dignified folk dancesT'
 Dixoms face grew pink in his ef- fort to. control his risibles.
 "Well. no--that is, I have not seen Miss Marian do any real folk dances, such as MT. Sumner refers to. But a-sshe may know how to do them, all - the samey
 s.. Do you, Marian?' the older sister slasked.
 Marian's answer was emphatic and fearless.
 s5a NO, I do not do folk dances. My speciality is not particularly digni- flied Lois. If 1t were, perhaps the kids would not enjoy them. And, ,aperhaps, too, the fact that they are aundignified might shock you were You to see them"
 afHe (To Be COntimued)
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-12-18

It was lots of fun. Helping another is always lots of fun and when they happened to think that the oven was not large enough to bake a large bal loon, Raggedy Ann made a lot. of small balloons so that they might be tied together and would be as good as one large one.
 When all the balloons had been baked, it was nice to see how round and light and fluffy they were. They sailed right out of the oven when the door was opened and everyone had more fun catching the balloons as they sailed around the ceiling When all the balloons were tied to- gether they took them down to the Goblins house, and prepared for Weekly to start on the trip to rescue the nice kind Snitznoodle.