davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Imperial Valley press., 1923-06-02

Turn eff the phonograph and
give the neighbors Il vacation.
Imperial Valley press., 1923-06-02

A shrine tn tie hearts Of men where lives a
faith ,hst God rules, and creed that men are
bre,he,. It's symbol: the little white church
--beesuse Of its simplicity end peaceful rev,
ererce-~ith nav skylghs, through Nhich
may come fhe sunshine Of ,olerance. vision
and diecernrent.
Imperial Valley press., 1923-06-02
i
FOR THOUGHT And HL,OY

Can the human mind conceive a
more beautiful or a more dramatic
story than tnat which commences
with God who so loved the world
as to give his only begotten Son;
which reaches its climax in Geth-
semane with the Son on his face
praying, 20 my Father. if It be pos
sible, let this cup pass from me;
nevertheless not as l will, but as
thou wilt" and which comes to its
end with the Son on the cross pray.
ing. Father forgive them?"
Is it any wonder that the @ible
is the best seller" by so wide a
margin that all other best sellers"
are comparatively poor seconds"
Read Luke 15:11-32.
Imperial Valley press., 1923-06-02
FATHERROOD
THE NEW VISION OF GOD

THE
to
teaching Iesls-e IA TE
herois
kNSiP with God If judge BY SIS fruits then
the world is simple
NOT JUST A HANDY FIGURE OF SPEECH
is of quite
anything
Jesus spoke Of God father indicates he
the Mount Gospel
Father" that be an
Fathers house" " things
Father 20 righteous Father HE that
[
Father" Your heavenly your good
pleasure" "our Father which art heaven"
WHAT EAyHERHooD IMPLIES
The 0ncspion Of God Faer implies least
relation BROTHERHOOD
~HIGHBRoWs" TO MAKE you FAThE sLE LEss-
teaching simple creedmaitc:s
o
minds the minds of others
sonaity
ones brother
"The White Life"
rule principle without SOMEONE uphold
white life Beware of these credakers
FATHER from
WAY
vague mystic the
for If would know the FaherHe
to them that ask hrn"-know
"He that hath hath the Father"-A
ton Of John 1879.
Imperial Valley press., 1923-06-02

tt
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1923-12-08
CASE
IS ARGUED
Priority of Guaranty Fund
Payments Involved

The question of whether the
Guaranty Fund Commission, with
funds on hand. should reimburse
depositors in full of closed banks in
>the order of their closing, or wheth-
err the fund should be prorated at
time Of division among deposito,s of
all closed banks, was submitted to
District Judge Thomas H. Pugh Of
Dickinson, here' today.
w. f. Burnett of Dickinson, rep
resenting A. j. Wertz, depositor in
the Security State Bank of New Eng
land, one of the first banks to close
in 1920, urged that the law provided
payment in order of the closing of
the banks. while A. G.. DiYct, repre-
senting the Guaranty Fund Commits
sion, took the position that depos-
tors in all closed banks, had an equal
interest in the fund, estimated to
exceed one million dollars at this
time.
Judge pugh took the ease under
advisement.
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1923-12-08
ST. PAUL LIVESTOCK

So St. Paul, Dec. Seattle re-
eeipts 5000. Compared with week
ago Gamers, cutters, common and
medium butcher she-stock and steers
unevenly Is to Is cents lower. Other
killing classes slow and steady.
Stockers and feeders big quarter
lower. Bulk prices at the close,
common and medium fat steers and
yearlings $3.50 to $500. Butcher
COWS and -heifers $3.50 to $3.50.
Gamers and cutters $3.50 to $500.
Bologna bulls 1926 to $500. Stock
ers and feeders $3.50 to $7.25. Bulk
$3.50 to $500. Calves receipts 100.
Compared with week ago veal calves
% to so cents higher than week
ago. Bulk best light calves today
mostly $500.
Hogs receipts 1000. Steady. Bulk
good and khoice 100 to $50 pound
averages $3.50. Bulk desirable 140
to 100 pound averages 1925. Pack
ing sOws $5.75. Pigs mostly $3.50.
Sheep receipts 1900. Steady. Bulk
of receipts consists of six doubles
of Montana ewes which had not been
sold up to late hour. Compared
with week ago fat lambs and sheep
steady TO 25 cents higher. Closing
bulk prices fat lambs ,$12.O to 1925.
C1lls $500 to $8.O5. Heavies $1,000.
Fat ewes to killers $3.50 to $685..
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1923-12-08
HIGH SCHOOL
AID WARRANTS
ARE SENT OUT

Warrants totalling $73,S27.00 are
being sent out as state aid to class
flied high schools of the state Be-
cause the number of classified high
schools has increased, and the APP
preparation has been unchanged, II
percent of the maximum which the
schools could receive under the law
which provides maximum payments
for various classes of schools, ac-
cording to State superintendent Miss
Minnie Nelson. The maximum scale
is $500 for Il first class high school,
$500 for second class and $500 for
third class school.
Four agricultural high schools at
Beach, Velva, Grafton and LaMoure
will receive $4,000 each, and fifth
could classify under the law for state
aid; 80 first class high schools will
receive $45,56000, "a second class
high schools will receive $l2,070 and
80 third class high schools will re
ceive $6,l97.30.
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1923-12-08

Oklahoma City, Dec. 5.-The death
knell of it's sponsors hopes for dras-
tic anti-Ku Klux Khan legislation in
the present session was sounded yes
terday when Khan sympathizers in
the lower house of the Oklahoma leg
islature frustrated attempts to rein
state provisions IN an act to force
secret organizations to reveal lists.
Such sections in the original bill
having been stricken out by the SEN
ate supporters Of the measure had
pinned their faith on the house for
stringent regulatory provisions, as
sorting that any act without clause
to throw secret membership rolls
open for public inspection would be
inadequate. The decisive majoritics
piled up against amendments watch
would have reinstated these provi-
sions, however, indicated the senti-
ment of the house and eliminated
any possibility in the opinion of OBJ
servers that further moves cOntem-
plated in this direction might be put
over.
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1923-12-08
INDIANS ON
INCREASE AND
PROSPER ALSO
Population of Red Man Now
344, 3O3-Wealth Near
Billion
WIN MANY PRIZES
MANY PRIZES
Revenue to Tribes From Oil
Leaves Approximately
$37,OOO,OOO

Washington, Dec. 8><The govern
Nment's Indian policy during the
coming year will again emphasize the
educational phase, Charles H. Burke
declared today in his annual report
as Commissioner of Indian Affairs.
As result of the intensive cam
paign in 1923, he said, attendance at
government boarding and day schools
totalled 24,l45, or nearly 1000 more
than the normal capacity, and the
number of eligible children not in
school was reduced by 5000. The
commissioners rec0mpendations in
cluded additional sanatoria schools
to help in overcoming disease, and a
hospital for crippled children.
The Indian population in the Unit
ed States, the report said, is now
44,303, an increase in ten years Of
1864. The total value of individual
and tribal property is estimated at
$1,O1O,87O,5l9, an increase in ten
years of $343,939,256. Allotments Of
land were made in the last IL months
to nearly 1000 Indians, comprising
1904 900 acres.
The report shows substantial in
crease in the number of Indians en-
gagged in farming. There was de-
posted in banks during the year APP
proximately $35,O00,0O0 of individual
Indian money. The Indians won many
prizes at county farm fairs in COM
petition with whites, and attractive
exhibits of their native arts and
crafts were made at Santa Fe and
Gallup, New Mexico, and at the ex-
position Of the Travel Club Of Amer
lea, New York City.
= The years leasings for oil and gas
mining exceeded 100000 acres; the
gross oil production was about 54,-
100000 barrels, and the revenue to
the Indians from existing leases was
approximately $37,OOO,OOO. In the
Usage Reservation, Oklahoma, 81.
S64 acres were offered for lease, 49,
OBJ acres selling for bonus of $14,
246,OO6. Several 160-acre leases sole
for more than 100000 each, the
highest price paid for any one tract
being $l,325,OOO. The Osages re
ceived $30,572,111 from existing OF
and gas leases. In the Five Civilized
Tribes leases for oil and gas mining
embraced 197,540 acres and the" to
tai oil and gas revenue was $5,591,
OO8.43. ..
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1923-12-08
BETTER TRAINING
BETTER POSITIONS

For the 18th time the State Agri-
cultural College has obtained office
help from Dakota Business College,
Fargo, N. d., Their latest em-
ployee is Mable Fossum, hired the
day she finished her y. b. Z.
courses. Every Fargo bank and
.6S5 others employ Dakota help;
SO do the leading courts.
The reason is plain. Dakota Bus
.iness College graduates are better
trained. Isn't it common sense 10
atteno the school that desirable en-
pIoyers 90 to for help! ''EoAoav the
$uete&SfM'' Begin January l-S.
Write +. l.. Watkins, Pres, 800
From. St. . Fargo. N. y. , TODAY.
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1923-12-08
MARKET NEWS
SUPPORT OF
BUYING LIGHT
) Wheat Drops in Early Deal
ings in Chicago

Chicago, Dec. 8.-Wlth virtually
no buying support in evidence wheat
dropped today during the early deal
ings. Scattered selling from COM
mission houses was sufficient to start
values downward. Sentiment was
genearlly bearish. The opening
which varied from shade to three
eighths cents tower with December,
$1O3 5-8 to- $1.O33-4 and May,
$1.O9 Id to $l.O9 1-2 was followed by
a material further decline.
Subsequently weekend evening
up of 'trades led to something of a
rally Tut for the most part the eff
fort was only trahtsient. The close
was unsettled, IA to 3-S to So
cents net lower.
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1923-12-08

6, has adopted state income tax
modelled on the federal income tax.
The state. tax, which must be paid
on the net income Of individuals and
Of corporations doing business in
the state, is pyramided on top OF
the federal income tax. In other
words, persons subject to income tax
must pay to the state as we'll as to
the federal government.
The law provides Il tax of per-
cent on, the first $1,000 Of taxable
income, or any part thereof. and in
creases one half Of one percent up
to $4,000, and for sums in excess
of $4,000 the rate is percent. The
exemptions provided in the state law
are similar to those of the federal
Paper was first made from rags in
A. ID. 1000.
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1923-12-08
CHICAGO LIVESTOCK.

Chicago, Dec. 8.-Hog receipts,
$4,000. Mostly steady. Spots weak
to slightly lower. Top, $40.
Cattle receipts, 1000. All classes
closing active. Unevenly higher than
week earlier. Mostly strong to- 25
cents up.
Sheep receipts, 1000. Strong to
around Is cents higher Few loads
top natives and fed western lambs,
$13.4O. Compared with week ago Fat
lambs and yearlings, weathers, steady
to Is cents higher.
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1923-12-08
WEATHER REPORT

For twenty-fopr hours ending at
noon today.
Temperature at Ia. m. ..o. 20
Temperature at noon .......... SO
Highest yesterday .............. AT
Lowest yesterday .............. 3S
Lowest last night ............... 20
Precipitation 0
Highest wind velocity -. 80. 20
Weather Forecast
For Bismarck and vicinity: Fair
tonight and Sunday. Not much
change in temperature.
For North Dakota: Fair tonight
and Sunday. Not much change in
temperature.
Weather Conditions
The low pressure area has moved
to the Mississippi Valley and Great
Lakes region accompanied by unset
tied, mild weather but with very
little precipitation. Temperatures
have dropped somewhat over the
Plains States but fair, mild wealth
er still prevails over this region.
Rain or snow. fell ut most places
from the Rockies to the Pacific coast.
Orris w. Roberts, Meteorological.
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1923-12-08
THE BISMARCK TRIBUNE

charged with the grand larceny Of a
threshing machine and a few other
small articles, was absolved OF the
charge when the preliminary hearing
was called and States Attorney l.. NJ.
Burkey made u motion for dismissal
Of the case
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1923-12-08
MINNEAPOLIS GRAIN
Minneapolis. Dec. 8.-Wheat

Minneapolis, Dec. 8.-Wheat re-
ceipts 215 cars compared with. 425
Mrs a year ago. Cash No. / NOR
thern, Sill 3-8 to $1.13 3-8; NO.
! dark northern spring choice to
fancy, $1.1S 3-S to $1.23 3-S; good
to choice, $1.14 3-8 to .$116 3-8;
ordinary to good, SIP 3-8 to
S1.15s 3-S; December 500 3-S;
May $1.13 rs: January $1.15.
Corn No. 81 yellow, s67s to 467, Ia.
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1923-12-08
Edward Sullivan. president. an.

Edward Sullivan. president, an
nounced.
Mr.. Sullivan said it was intended
to have one Or probably two Mime
sofa speakers ut the meeting which
will b. held in the latter part of ,Ianu-
airy.
Other speakers will be secured to
develop further plans for the forty
acre plus campaign which the Press
association is determined to make IL
success, Mr.. Sullivan said
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1923-12-08
TO Make Plans For
n. ID. Press Meeting

New Salem, N. d., Dec. s.-Plans
for the winter meeting of the North
Dakota. Press association will be
formulated at a meeting Of the eX-
ecutive committee and officers at the
Gardner hotel in Fargo, December IA.
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1923-12-08
ANTI-KLAN
DOOMED
Drastic Legislation Cannot
Pass in Oklahoma

Oklahoma City, Dec. Slow
er House Of the Legislature
passed without amendment the
Senate Anti ku klux Khan bill,
II to Is. The bill prohibits
mask but does not make public
names Of members and goes to
Trap for signature. MOsbach,
; Baden, COrliss and Griffis given
sentence of IL months.
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1923-12-08

FREED FROM LARCENY CHARGE.
-Arnegard, N. d., Dec. s.-Oluf
Drovdal of Arnegard, who was re-
Gently arrested on complaint of A.
l.. Larson, former county treasurer,
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1923-12-08
OREGON CITIZENS VOTE
FOR DOUBLE TAXATION

Portland, Ore, Dec. s.-Oregon.
through action of the state legisla
ture, ratified by a small majority of
voters at, a referendum election Nov.
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1923-12-08

Oats No. 8 white, 80 7-S to 40 3-S.
Barley so to 64c. IS
No. 2.rye, 65 "a to sc 1-2.
Flax No. 1, $3.50 1-2 to $2.52 1-2.
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1923-12-08

For Sale Choice Canarie
Singers. Imported German
Rollers. Jacob Bull, Dickin-
son, N. Oak.
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1923-12-08
MINNEAPOLIS FLOUR

Minneapolis, Dec. 8.-Fl0ur un-
changed. Shipments 1925 bar.
rels. Bran &26.00lto $27.OQ
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1923-12-08

Paper was first made from rags il
A. ID. 1000,
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-01-27
VOdville on
Clothes
Bv Nat N. DOrfman.
~ ITTER-Wher are you 60
- ing with that gun?

IIlER-W mere oAC SON o.
- ing with that gun?
- Patter-Out to get my
wife new dress.
Pitter-then what's the idea of
the heavy artillery?
Patter-Oh, the dressmaker
held up my wife when she bought
a gown last and I'm going to
hold her up for a change.
Patter-But that's highway
robbery.
Patter-I know, but that's no
greater robbery than the prices
they ask. My wife hasn't a
stitch to her back.
Pitter-Oh, then she's right in
style. Don't you know that wom-
en- aren't wearing a thing on
their backs this season?
Patter-Yes; I could tell that
by what they charge for the
dresses. The less woman
wears, the more it costs.
Pitter-Oh, that immaterial to
q dressmaker. It's the style
you're paying for-the snap.
Flapper Fairy Tales.
Ludwig-Well. sweetheart, my
horse came through for me yes
terday, and I've got money to
burn. Now let's go downtown
and pick out a new set of furs
for you.
Georgette-Thank you, darling,
but I don't need any.
Ludwig-How's that? Are you
going to Palm Beach for the
Winter?
Georgette-No. But I've gotten
no fond of my old furs that I
couldn't bear to give them up for
another set.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-01-27
There's a Reason.

Hale-Why is it that you are
going around with that Wilkins
girl so much?
Hardy-Because it doesn't cost
very much to amuse her.
Hale-Whatdye mean; does
she like to stay home evenings?
Hardy-No. but her father owns
o movie theater.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-01-27
A High Climber.

Hale-I understand that one of
those convicts used to be quite
q social climber in the commu-
nifty.
Hardy-Yes, he climbed up to
the second story of every house
In town before they caught him.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-01-27
A Difference.

Husbands this what you call
cottage pudding?
Wife-It would have been, emily
it didn't rise, so now it's fiat
cuStard.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-01-27

Mr.. sapp-The case has been
decided in my favor.
Mr.. Head suppose you VIII
he taking that trip to Europe
now?
Mr.. Sap-No; my lawyer sails
this week.-Puppet.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-01-27
The Flapper Blues.

To stay at home
Is not much fun;
have to get
The dishes done.
But to go out
Is just as bad;
If I don't pet
The boys get mad.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-01-27
ZOWie!

"That fellow is the only mem
Der of our club above suspicion"
said Jones.
"How's that?" queried Brown.
Hes the only bachelor we
haver
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-01-27
THEN AND NOW
BY L. C. Conklin.

Dy As Ns OUuAllue
~ ONCE DE LEON looks for
Fountain Of Youth. 1913. IL
II forced to wash In bathroom
ten years later.
Pilgrim Fathers leave Holland
because they don't like it, 1919.
Kaiser Bill decides 1t must be q
good place to live, 1920.
Pilgrim Daughters land on Ply
mouth Rock. 1920. First Ply
mouth Rock chickens In America.
BENJAMIN Franklin experiments
with electricity, 1852. Visits
French court and gets shocked,
177e.
Patrick Henry wants liberty or
death, 1774. Loses all hope for
either by getting married.
Paul Revere starts horseback
riding fad, ITS.
Friction match patented, 1885.
Smoker strikes one successfully,
1850.
Western Union Telegraph Com
pany established. 1851. Wives
send kilograms collect, 1s51-1922.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-01-27

A girl with good figure wavy
hair. a smooth complexion, and
pretty teeth never has to worry
about brains.-Jade.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-01-27
How 1t Happened.

Knicker-Smithkins gave his
wife plenty of rope.
Bocker-Yes; I guess that's why
she skipped.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-01-27

"This bed Is getting so hard
can hardly sleep any more"
Maybe that's because you are
such a heavy sleeper. -Frlvol.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-01-27
Qualified to Talk.

Publisher-"You say you have
written a book entitled Why
Boys Go to College?' What do
you know about it? You're no
college boy"
Fair Authoress-"No, but I
used to be a chorus girl"
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-01-27

"Ah," murmured the Innocent
victim as the dentist began to tell
q Joke. "Why pull that one?"-
Octopus.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-01-27

She: I'm afraid, Don, that 1 will
never see you in heaven.
He: Great guns! What have YOU
been doing now?-Sour Owl.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-01-27

Tho Emperor Of Sassafras re.
fused TO take Insomnia for his
middle name the day he was
christened.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-01-27

We'd like 10 tell the story about
the crude oil but it isn't refined.
Virginia Reel.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-01-27

He-Would you scream II ]
kissed you?
She-Well, I wouldn't want to
brighten mother.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-01-27

Mexican hairless puppies cry
for days when they discover they
win never have pompadours or
use for hair ribbons.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-01-27

"Ain't this beautiful sprtngF
"Only $685." said the salesman.
-Squib.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-01-27

Fourteen natives Of Cuckoo Isle,
Iceland, went insane trying to In
vent . vest pocket cigar store.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-01-27
TRY TO WORRY
IF

THE woman nett door want.
to be Q barefoot dancer.
An actress wants to take her
pet snake to bed.
Your landlord has acres az coal
A comedians wife says they're
hard to. 1--we with.
Your endowment policy il all
paid.
The bird who overcharged YOU
on a barrel Of apples is stricken
with st. Vitus Dance.
Concertinas arc tho flappers.
latest fad,
Mud turtles like breakfast food.
A goat can eat bucktooth saw
without cream on It. .
A scientist IL trying to perfect
ear muffs for germs.
A piccolo has no gender, or WIN
not mix with Thermometers.
Fourteen natives Of Cuckoo Isle,
Iceland, went insane trying to In
vent o vest pocket cigar store.
Tho Emperor Of Sassafras re-
fused to take Insomnia for his
middle name the day he was
chr1stened.
Mexican hairless puppies cry
for days when they discover they
viii never have pompadours or
use for hair ribbons.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-01-27
The Chase.

The Chase.
AYOW sings the wind In roar
M ing bass,
~ y Now like q. child's shr1ll
crying;
It whishs pas kelly up the street,
His frantic grabs defying.
Now sweeps the sleet across the
pave,
The asphalt's Hike a mirror,
Pa slides along with arms awave,
The lid is getting nearer.
Wild melodies are in the wind,
A thousand voices calling:
There goes the hat, with pa be-
hind;
Look out! He slips!! He's fall
ing!!!
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-01-27
Our Hall of Fame.
My hero is
Avoir Du Pois;
He can drink soup
And make no noise.

He with malice): something
is the matter with this car: 7
guess We'll have to stop"
She dnnocently): Your clutch
is slipping"
He tmore maliciously): AS soon
as we stop I'll attend to THAT
Virginia Reel.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-01-27

Author have q hairraising
story.
Editor-Tell 1t to some bald
headed man.-Chaparra1.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-01-27

A piccolo has no gender, or WIN
not mix with Thermometers.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-01-27
A Good Catch.

Hale-Congratulate me, old top.
! got engaged to Miss Freckles
last night
Hardy-But she's as homeIy as
eln; What on earth do you see
In her?
Hale-Her father has five tons
OF coal in his cellar.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-01-27
FlaDper Fairy Tales.

Ludwig-I'm sorry, darling, but
we can't go to the party to-
night.
GeOrgette-What's the matter,
are you sick?
Ludwig-No. I lost my job to-
day and I'm broke.
Georgette-Oh, that's all right.
III give you the wrist watch that
Reggie Van Astorbilt gave me
Tor Xmas SO you can take it
down to the pawnshop and get
enough to buy the tickets.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-01-27

A scientist IL trying to perfect
ear nuffs for germs.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-01-27

Your endowment policy is ar
paid.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-01-27

A comedians wife says they're
hard to. 1--we with.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-01-27

The bird who Overcharged you
on barrel Of apples is stricken
with st. Vitus Dance.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-01-27

Poor craftsmanship.
My sweetheart slyly winked at me
When asked If / might kiss her:
I think she must be two faced. for
j lunged at her and missed her