davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Phillips County herald., 1923-07-26
SOUTH AMHERST

Mr.. and Mrs. Willard Butterfield
were visitors at the Otto Kruger
home Thursday.
Mr.. and Mrs. Chas. Kruger aud
children were Venanga visitors SIM
day.
Mr.. Butterfield and son. Arthur.
were visitors at the Chas. KRUGER
home Monday
Margaret Kruger and Evelyn
Kruger were visitors at the w.
Prussman home Thursday.
Mr.. and Mrs. Chas. Kruger and
sons, were over to Julesburg Satur-
day.
Mr. and Mrs. Otto Kruger were
visitors at the Chas. Kruger home
Sunday.
Mr.. and Mrs. Otto Kruger were
visiting at the w. Prussman home on
Sunday.
Mr.. and Mrs. George Rehfeld we're
visiting at the Jacobitz home Sunday.
Art and Harvey Butterfeld were
Holyoke visitors Saturday,
Miss Stella Celery left for a short
visit with friends and relatives in
Kansas.
Mr.. d. Duden is on the sick list
this week.
Miss Margaret Gentert has gone on
short visit to Kenesaw, Nebr.
Phillips County herald., 1923-07-26
Sudden shrInkaoo.

unclc ElzIe, after n half days lsh.
ing. was owner of quite string or
good sized nsh, and wns very proud
" his cntch lie had them In the
water on string awaiting time TO go
home.
Fishing nj tho snme place were n
couple Of mlschievous boys, nn1 no
ilclng Uncle Elzlc's string they
thought they would trndo while he
was not looking. putting a string OF
smnll lsh In place Of his lnrger ones.
when Uncle El1le was rcndy 10 go
he pulled his string OF fsh out md
looked nj them. very excited. md re,
marked:
"ff you nm the fsh which ! caught
which yon nm. you sure have
shrunked. Judge.
Phillips County herald., 1923-07-26
sev.n,b child Named aenouoh. /"

The Office was crowded with the
wedding pnrty. All were silent while
the bridegroom filled In the blanks.
For the purpose of this story Wen call
him Smith, says the New York Times,
The secretary looked over the mar
rlage license, II gave the gr0oms
name ns "John Enough Smith,"
She snid
"The clerk Mt the license bureau has
made n mistake; see what ridiculous
middle name he has given you
Enough"
without looking up the groom replied
dryly:
"No mistake on the pnrt Of the
clerk. My mother gnye mo that mid
die nnme-i was the seventh child"
Phillips County herald., 1923-07-26
Good Idea for Radiators.

By mems OF n new device. shown
In Popular Mechanics Magazine, the
bothersomc legs OF radiators. from
around which dirt Il removed with
difficulty. nrc done away with and the
radiator supported from the pipe con.
nections nt the floor. Inconsplcuona
wnli brnccs prevent the radiator from
tipping. and adjustable center rests
nro provided for long radiators fhc
attachments nrc adaptable to amy size
or make of radiator.
Phillips County herald., 1923-07-26
The Earth's Eneruy.

Il has been estimated that the pow
'r developed by million Niagaras in
m!llion years would not equal the
'ne:gy expended by the earth in a sin
sc second as ii circles around the
N. And yet so perfect is the mech
Gn'sm that, flying around its axis at
= equatorial speed of more than a
ho.sand miles an hour and around its
nrbit at more than LOO miles min
ute, all the mundane influences of
which astronomers know could not
change the length of its day as much
rs second In hundred thousand
%e2rs. "-"'-,-.sl .sxsrErrlfr77
Phillips County herald., 1923-07-26
esI,brated eeIaIan Eowls.

The village OF Brnckcl, In Belgium.
|lols The fame Of having originated
NJ the most celebrated races OF
nestle fowls. The Bclglnns do not
E'alc TO assert that the Bracket
rs are unelunled for the excellence
number OF their eggs, while the
slrrs have developed. thanks Ia
aerailons OF cultivation and lnilu.
r. N Growing tournaments" n
H'f and rhythm OF voice equal.
uhrivaled. The breeders have n
lnry that the musical contests in
l'h the Bracket roostcrs nre trained
'e 10 develop the peculiar qunli.
OF the rncc. However this may
u ia certain that cultivation hns
ofehllnted these fowls from nll
hers
Phillips County herald., 1923-07-26
PENCIL. Wasted by Americans.

open-hnnded Americans nre the
most lavish users of pencils In the
world. the United States alone using
twice M mnny ns NIL Europe. said Lo-
thar W. Fnbcr. the "pencll King"
"rhc European uses a pencil until
there Is bnrely anything for him to
hold In his flngers.' snid Mr.. Fnber,
"whllc the American throws II AWAY
when II IL hardly more than half used.
America uses about million and n
half gross year. nine or ten pencils
per cnpltn. Europe uses only half Tint
nmount."
Phillips County herald., 1923-07-26
TRIUMPH FOR AMERICAN GIRL
How Margaret Robinson Secured Am
nesty for Bandit Band on condi-
tion That IL Joined Array.

Is there no Homer In modern Greece
to sing the exploit of the American
college girl who has freed Crete Of its
bandits? asks the New York World.
When Miss Margaret Robinson of
Grand Rapids arrived In Crete as the
representative of Near East relief her
efforts to aid the refugees encountered
the predatory opposition OF the Greek
outlaw Barbounis and his band, who
for fifteen years had terrorized the IS
land. Sending an envoy to the robber
chief, she began negotiations which re-
suited In the grant Of amnesty to Ear-
bounis and his followers by the gov
ernment on condition of their serving
In the Greek army on the Turkish
frontier, and the harassed population
has since had the satisfaction of see
Ing the bandits sail away to join the
"King's Own" regiment at Dedea-
Catch.
Has more romantic story come out
of Crete since the time of the MinO-
taur? AT least the feat of the Ameri-
can relief worker furnishes an inter-
esting modern example Of the kind Of
achievement which provided themes
for the old Greek poets. Given, that it
had occurred in remote antiquity, 1t
might by this tine have been embel
lished and elaborated into a great pop
ular myth possessing enough historical
truth to give it substance and adding
a new female portrait to the familirr
gallery of Arladnes, Antigones and
Electras.
Phillips County herald., 1923-07-26
Mlnh, L nnL aad.

"Sec, George. dear" said the young
bride. II baked my first cnke today,
and want you to eat some Of H."
'I nm willing" snld hubby, ns he
looked snsplclously nt the cake "bui
I'VE Just hnd my life insured
"why. That's nll the better, isn't llf'
laughed the bride, merrlly.
II don't know about That" he re-
piled. "fhey might think you baked
the calte on purpose and refuse to pny
the polley"--Iloston Transcript.
Phillips County herald., 1923-07-26
Joh'a Comfortnr.

Know. my dear" snld the old
~ That II ls hard for you to be SO
Ipell and not to be invited by the
10 90 on these Joy rides and road.
'~ PARTIES, but nt least you hive
.alltfncilon OF knowing you nrc
f'nlhlng clear conscience"
=" no doubt" sighed her homely
~ but n good.looltlng ahelk could
l'alh mo lot more satisfactorily"
ngIhnnll Enquirer.
Phillips County herald., 1923-07-26
nu,l,I place for nsross.

A grent cemetery Ia TO be lnld out
at snrrelbourR. Germany. for the re-.
lntermcnt OF 10000 French soldiers
who died In Germany NJ prisoners Of
war. The municipality Of Sarrebonrg,
which Ii near the frontier, requested
the honor OF providing tho Last rest
ing plnce "for those unhappy heroes
whose llycs were sacrificed In cnp.
tylty."
Phillips County herald., 1923-07-26
Origin Of Humble Cabbage.

The first cabbage in England was
cultivated BY an ancestor Of Lord
Shaftsbury, Sir Anthony Ashley. at
the ancestral home, st. Giles house.
This fact explains the reason for the
cabbage leaves carved on the tomb
Of Sir Abbey.
Phillips County herald., 1923-07-26
II Needs Turpentine.

Sometimes shoe polish becomes hard
in the box and not fit to use. You can
soften 1t and make It as good as ever
IL you add little turpentine and let
1t stand for short time.
Phillips County herald., 1923-07-26
The New Question.

The question used to be: Can a man
love more than one woman at one
time? The modern question is: How
can he help it?-Rlchmond Times Dis
patch.
The Washington times., 1923-05-11
Heard on Our End of Phone.

Hello! Who?-Oh, SO it's YOU.
you Black Delilia. l.. heahd of
you goin out Wit dat black babys
Paul Henderson, an I'm off you
TO eveh.-Ah know All amt no
lily fob coloh, but All amt now
hehe SO black as dat boy
Couldn't be blacker dan me!
Why he's so black dat, dat he's
unclean-Cose All amt goin. 10
take it nice. Why wasn't dat my
money dat you used to pay fob
the mellon?-Shaw. Gal, whehe
did you even earn money Of youth
-wohkin Saved. Why you
daughteh of perdition, an you toll
me you gave me all youh wages.
Youth mad. What right have
YOU got to be mad. Aim the
guy what's mad, an All want to
tell you that we is done. Get
dat? Neveh mohe will you run
dem skinny fingers thru my haih
and say. "Sweetie, 70 got the most
wunerful spirals in dem hath dat
All even SEEN" No. moh.-You
want me to forget that I even
knowed you? Sisteh, dat CANT
be done. Every time All look out
nah window, and see dose bahs
and dat guard VIII that gun, All
remembers yo.-Cose you didn't
know dat dem police wanted 10
rest me, but you didn't need to
give EN- nah addreSs.-Sorry:
Dis aln't no time to be sorrys.
CANT 70 get five bones to pay
dis fine?-Maybe? Well, now Gal.
didn't An alus treat you nice2
Didn't we have mellon every night
durin the summah. didn't All aHus
give you half yo wages? Tell ye
what, Gal. If yo gets me dat
fine, Ahll buy 80 dat yellow hat
yo wanted de fust time All tangles
wifi an honest crap game.-Dat'T
de stuff, Honey. 70 know Al
was only foolin bout bein mad
OATS right, and if you gets il
Ah'n Togo dat liekin All prong
ised yo.-All right, Honey. Goa
M, Puppet
The Washington times., 1923-05-11
RADIO RAG

Meow Meow Meow Catriip.
Miss.
Are you there Cinders?
Right here Ashes. What's ION
your mind? s1a
Here yer be: what ala
Crouch say when his wife said
she had a pain?" AZ
Said, Put in sash an ycu'll
have a window"
When does chauffeur feei
like a top!'
When he's ready for a spin"
Righto. Get this: do dark;
haired girls marry first?"' -.
mo the light-headed ones"
That's all.
All right. Come again Stupid,
come again-when I'm out. -
will. s-fss
The Washington times., 1923-05-11
WHEN IN LOVE

With a telephone operator,
don't call your other lady friends
On the phone.
With a carpenters daughter,
look out for tacks when you sit
down on the parlor davenport.
With minister's daughter don't
preach to her.
With a stenograpler, don't say
anything that you wouldn't want
70 have put in writing.
With a bootlegger's daughter
keep telling her how thirsty the
warm weather makes you feel.
The Washington times., 1923-05-11
MEDBURY
S AY S.
By John P, Medbury.


" HE girl who has the most
beautiful hands in the
United. States says that
they got that way by keeping
them in dishwater.
when this news got out the
drug stores were crowded with
hundreds of danes wanting TO
know where they could get sonle'
The druggist told them to go
home and look in the sink.
A lot Of girls are very unSelT1sh
and would rather let their mothers
have beautiful hands.
The only time they pay any
attention to the dishes is when
they're piled with food.
One dame said 1t was tmposSi-
bic for her to have gOOdIOolking
hands because she always ate in
restaurants.
But now she's making them
beautiful by washing the dishes
every time she goes into cafe
terra.
In another month her hands
will be wonderful, provided the
cafe don't run out Of diShpans.
Dishwater may be great for the
skin and fingers, but no girl
wants to manicure her nails
among lot Of pots and pans.
And she couldn't put much Of
o polish ON them with a bar of
sand soap.
The sink might be good for the
hands, but you'd have a hard job
convincing the average dame
that the kitchen is the same as a
beauty parlor.
Dishwater is the best skin
beautifier on the market, but You
never see the women carrying
any of it around with them in
bottles.
They'd rather have an ounce of
something they pay a dollar for
than to have a gallon of some
thing that they can get for
nothing.
III some perfume company took
aiShwater and put it up in fancy
bottles they wouldn't be able to
supply the demand.
n - -. -
All they'd have to do would be
TO paste a pretty label on it say
ing, "Put UP in France" instead
OF Bottled at the Sink"
Everybody knows that dish.
water will give your hands a
marvellous complexion, but a lot
Of DANES are 50 lazy they'd
rather wear gloves.
Copyright. 1898, King Features
Syndicate, Inc.)
WHEN IN LOVE
The Washington times., 1923-05-11

A talking doll has been devised
which will help children to leaFA
to speak. Many grown.up man
has been taught a thing or two
by a talking doll" baA
The Washington times., 1923-05-11
FOUL BALLS

The guy at the office who
wants to know what happened
when you asked the boss for a
raise.
An iceman in a Turkish bath,
A chaperone on moonlight
sail.
The. landlady on Saturday
night.
Girls who like to smoke i'm.
ported cigarettes.
A bald.headed man at a hair
dressers' convention.
The Washington times., 1923-05-11

One trouble with uncalled fer
suits is that they always look 20
entirely uncalled for.
The Washington times., 1923-05-11

"Here'S a fine opening for a nice
young man" said the grave-dig.
ser. as he threw out the last
shoveiful Of dirt.-Tuftonic.
The Washington times., 1923-05-11

Chicago has a home for poets,
and the number of letter-carriers
on that route has been doubled. i
The Washington times., 1923-05-11

Some girls try to elevate their
minds by building up their heels.
The Washington times., 1923-05-11

This country is still in fairly
normal condition as long as tie
people look at the weather fofa
cast in the morning paper before
they look at the foreign news.
The Washington times., 1923-05-11

You might call the present
style in skirts extreme, because
they have gone to greater lengths.
The Washington times., 1923-05-11

No matter what happens, you
always meet somebody who knew
it would.
The Washington times., 1923-05-11

NdICGIS.
Joe Johnson's parents thought
That he
A, famous financier would be,
While Lawrence Lucian Leonard
LentZ
Was known to have no business
sense;
But now that forty years have
passed.
Fate puts them in a different
cast;
To Larry's wishes all men cater
While Joe is working as q waiter.
They had to carry Carol to the
carriage;
The carriage carried Carol to
the door;
The reason they had to- carry
Carol to a carriage,
| Was because Carol couldn't
carry any more.
! -Awgwan.
The Washington times., 1923-05-11

Men used to become monks to
escape marriage; now they b&
come monkeys-and don't.
The Washington times., 1923-05-11

A great deal of time which
might be spent in self-improyA
ment is wasted by young men Mfso
take girls to restaurants and wait
for them to make up their minds
what they want for dessert.
The Washington times., 1923-05-11

When a man can make UP his
mind on a point, possibly hA
doesn't require any more room
than that.
The Washington times., 1923-05-11

Sleeping sickness seems toiaBe
prevalent on park benches. p
The Washington times., 1923-05-11

Thoreau says that q man never
forgets anything once learned, but
Thoreau never had occasion to
nemorize a few impromptu re-
marks to fit into a banquet pro-
gramn1e.
The Washington times., 1923-05-11

Everybody knows that dish
water will give your hands a
marvellous complexion, but a lot
Of DANES are 50 lazy they'd
rather wear gloves.
Copyright. 1898, King Features
Syndicate, Incl
The Washington times., 1923-05-11

Doubtless the strangest person
in the round world, at this writ
ing, is the person who 10 still try
ing to keep his New Years resQr
buttons.
The Washington times., 1923-05-11

IT'S perfectly all right to cali
a girl vision. but thfNk
u twice before You cali her i
sight. -
The Washington times., 1923-05-11

All they'd have to do would be
10 paste a pretty label on it say
ing, "Put UP in France" instead
OF Bottled at the Sink
The Washington times., 1923-05-11

The only time they pay any
attention to the dishes is when
they're piled with food.
The Washington times., 1923-05-11

II some perfume company took
aiahwater and put it up in fancy
bottles they wouldn't be able to
supply the demand.
The Washington times., 1923-05-11

The druggist told them to go
home and look in the sink.
The Washington times., 1923-05-11
GRINS AND
GROWLS :
BY Isle Bell.

TT'S perfectly all right to cali
a girl vision, but think
II twice before you cali her
sight. -
Men used to become monks to
escape marriage; now they b&
come monkeys-and don't.
When a man can make UP hik
mind on point, possibly Ne
doesn't require any more room
than that.
You might call the present
style in skirts extreme, because
they have gone to greater lengths.
No matter what happens, you
always meet somebody who knew
it would.
This country is still in a fairly
normal condition as long as tie
people look at the weather fopa
cast in the morning paper before
they look at the foreign news.
Thoreau says that man never
forgets anything once learned, but
Thoreau never had occasion to
memorize a few impromptu re-
marks to fit into banquet pro-
gramme.
SO
Doubtless the strangest person
in the round world, at this writ
ing, is the person who is still try
ing to keep his New Years resQr
1utions.
A great deal Of time which
might be spent in self-improv&
ment is wasted by young men Mis0
take girls to restaurants and wait
for them to make up their minds
what they want for dessert.
rsis
Chicago has a home for poets,
and the number of letter-carriers
on that route has been doubled. =
sseA
Some girls try to elevate their
minds by building up their heels.
sa
A talking doll has been devised
which will help children to leaFA
to speak. Many a grown.up man
has been taught a thing or two
by a talking doll baA
isu
One trouble with uncalled fer
suits is that they always look 90
entirely uncalled for.
Sleeping sickness seems totabe
prevalent on park benches. ~
The Washington times., 1923-05-11

A lot Of girls are very unsedfish
and would rather let their mothers
have beautiful hands.
The Washington times., 1923-05-11

Dishwater is the best skin
beautifier on the market, but you
never see the women carrying
any of it around with them in
bottles.
The Washington times., 1923-05-11

They'd rather have an ounce of
something they pay a dollar for
than to have a gallon of some
thing that they can get for
nothing.
The Washington times., 1923-05-11

In another month her hands
will be wonderful, provided the
cafe don't run out Of diShpans.
The Washington times., 1923-05-11

One dame said 1t was iInpOsSi-
Bile for her to have gOodlOolking
hands because she always ate IN
restaurants.
The Washington times., 1923-05-11

when this news got out the
drug stores were crowded with
hundreds of danes wanting 70
know where they could get some.
The Washington times., 1923-05-11

Dishwater may be great for the
skin and fingers, but no girl
wants to manicure her nails
among a lot Of pots and pans.
The Washington times., 1923-05-11

The sink might be good for the
hands, but you'd have hard job
convincing the average dame
that the kitchen is the same as a
beauty parlor.
The Washington times., 1923-05-11

And she couldn't put much of
q polish ON them with a bar of
sand soap.
The Washington times., 1923-05-11

But now she's making them
beautiful by washing the dishes
every time she goes into a cafe
terra.
The Washington times., 1923-05-11

+" HE girl who has the most
beautiful hands in the
United. States says that
they got that way by keeping
them in dishwater.
The Raymer enterprise., 1923-06-21
MONUMENT TO COST $4,000
GaIbraith Memorial Committee Ia
Seeking Soldier, Sailor and Nurse
to Pose for Tablet.

A World war soldier, a sailor, 5
marine and an army nurse are sought
by members Of the +. W. Galbraith
Memorial committee OF the American
Legion to volunteer to pose for the
individual figures Of the monument
to be erected In Eden park, In memory
Of the National commander who was
killed in an automobile accident near
Indianapolis In 1921. M... t...
They will depict the various
branches of the service upon the
bronze tablet. which will be AZ feet
high and 10 feet long. 1t will cost
$4,000, and Is now In the process OF
making by Clement J. Barnhorn, Gin.
clnnatl sculptor, who was selected
from n group Of leading artists by
the committee.
On the extreme left Of the tablet
will be the figure Of the angel OF
victory, to the right Of which will
be sailor. A soldier win hold a
medallion Of the bust Of Colonel Gal.
bralth. appearing in the center Of the
memorial. To the right will he the
figure of marine In kneelIng posi-.
tion, and then an army nurse. On the
extreme right will he the angel Of
peace. All Of the figures will be
linked with chain Of flowers sym.
hollcnl Of the binding together Of the
armed forces Of the country, In con.
stituting the membership Of the Ameri.
can Legion.
The Raymer enterprise., 1923-06-21
NEW CONTESTS AMONG POSTS
Rehabilitation Committee Propose,
Plan to Create Interest In Vet.
eranv Bureau Problems.

The national rehabilitation commit
tee OF the American Legion Is propos.
Ing to chalrmen Of local districts that
a contest, based on the work of the
posts In the district, toward aiding ex.
service men to regain their places In
community life, be conducted. with the
purpose Of creating active post interest
In the problems of the disabled men
and the veterans bureau.
A communication from Joe Sparks
chairman of the national committee,
states that, "While. Of course, no In.
centive In the way Of trophy Is re
quired to have any Legion post assist
Its disabled comrades, nevertheless II
Is felt that the presentation Of loving
cup to the post performing the most
service to our disabled comrades would
express appropriately the appreciation
OF the department awarding the cup,
and would at the same time furnish
n tangible honor to which the post
could point with pride"
The winner Of the contest In each de.
partment would be decided by the
score piled up on basis Of points.
These points, Mr.. Sparks suggests,
could be allotted In the following man.
ner, based on the efforts Of the post !:
Twenty-Five for every man hospitalized,
20 for every man awarded compensa.
tion. Is for every man awarded sec.
tion 2 training 5 for every man award.
ed section training, 5 for every 81. 900
insurance reinstated. 8 for every train.
ing opportunity offered and accepted,
and 25 for every Job for trained vet.
Grams offered and accepted.
1t Is further suggested that each de-
partment officer furnish the posts
within Its district with concise sum,
maries Of the most efficient manner Of
accomplishing the desired results. so
that no unnecessary labor be DONE
II. Is felt" the communication from
Mr.. Sparks concludes. "by the commit.
tee that the effect Of such a contest
will be to arouse a friendly rivalry
which will result In increased service
to our disabled comrades. We believe
that II this same Idea Is carried out In
every state department the results m.
tionally will be shown In less com.
plants on the part Of claimants within
a short space Of time"
The Raymer enterprise., 1923-06-21
LEGION MAN STATE ENGINEER
r. L. Cochran, World War Veteran,
10 Honored by Governor Bryan
Of Nebraska.

The Office of state engineer Of
Nebraska has been awarded to r. L.
Cochran, Of Lincoln, a member Of the
American Legion who spent fourteen
months overseas during the World
war. His appointment was made by
Governor Bryan.
A graduate Of the University Of
Nebraska, Cochran's first Job was
that Of rodman with the Atchison,
Topeka & Santa Fe railroad. Then
ne was elected surveyor Of Lincoln
county and also maintained q private
practice as consulting engineer. In
1916, he was appointed state bridge
Inspector and later investigated a dis
pute between the states of Wyoming
and Nebraska over water rights pend
ing Supreme court trial.
Appointed deputy state engineer In
1917. Cochrans career in that office
was cut short by his enlistment in the
engineering corps Of the army. He
was transferred to the coast artillery
as a first lieutenant and went into
training at Fortress Monroe. His over.