davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1923-10-20
NOM SIMS
)! = Says
TOW that the world series is
I'M over footbaIlers come to
pass.

7OW that the world series is
I'M over footballers come to
~ pass.
Football players are among the
few who are cheered for kicking.
Zuppke of Illinois is a football
coach even If he does sound like
foreigner asking for soup.
While Zuppke writes football plays
he is not a playwright. He writes SO
they won't play wrong.
Best football players come from
the broad open spaces where men
are men and women are girls.
While the football season ends on
Thanksgiving this is not the original
excuse for Thanksgiving.
Learning football is no easy mat
ter. Arguing with traffic cops and
ice men is fine training
Excellent way to learn football is
by kicking every lap-dog you see
and then running.
Football players must be tough
They must be tough as cafe steaks
Eating cafe steaks will help them
Never feed a football player on
raw meat. It is dangerous. He may
bite off his girls nose.
Looking for needles in haystacks
will train football players eyes to
see the point.
Football is better than golf Every
body knows whore the ball is.
Best way to train a footballer is
make him fall in love. Then he will
fight like a bedbug.
What's a little rouge between a
girl and her football hero? Nothing,
If 1t is on her lips.
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1923-10-20
AS the Traveller
Sees It
BY BERTON BRALEY

BY BERTON BRALEY
I'm used to spending eight bucks a
day
For a little room with a shower
bath,
Three bones for breakfast | often
pay.
Without exhibiting rabid wrath.
But dissolve in fiery vapor
When soaked three cents for a two
cent paperl
The holder gratis of a large hotel,
I know them all and l bear them
meekly,
It's very seldom l groan or yell,
And If holler, boiler weakly;
But like an Indian brave l caper
When charged three cents for a two
cent paper!
BY big hotels am often gated,
I'm used to it and I don't complain,
But the guy who started thai news
stand graft
Some day I'll murder, and when
he's slain
III pay three cents for a funeral
taper
Which I shall make of a two-cent
paper!
Copyright, 1928, NEA Service, Inc.)
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1923-10-20
Family Fun
Willie as n Caddy

What do you mean, young man, ="
asked the merchant Of the boy. by
counting your change so carefully?
Are you afraid that 1 would cheat
your"
II don't know" replied the boy.
I'm just making sure that you won't.
used to caddy for you at the golf
links Detroit Ere Press.
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1923-10-20
Heard in the Smoking Room

mi HE story about Mrs. Fords in
| terview with the bare-legged
- women up in northern Mich
.gan caused a laugh in the smoker.
The man from William Allen Whites
Emporfa paper said: Mrs. Ford
ought to meet the woman who re-
Gently visited Al my town. This wom-
an. from all appearance. never had
used or even Ieen a modern bath-tub
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1923-10-20
Little Brothers. Trick

You say your sister will be down
in a minute, Willie? That's good
news. I thought perhaps she wanted
to be excused, as she did the other
day"
Not this time. / played a trick
on her.
What did you dor"
81 said you were another fellow. -
London Tit-Bits.
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1923-10-20

Your wife needs a holiday at a
Spa"
Indeed I'd ike you to know that
I could get brand.new wife for far
less than she costs me for repairs -
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1923-10-20

before. She was shown into the bath
room and she looked on in wonder
as the various faucets, fixtures, ETC..
were shown to her. She looked at the
shiny tub and, in an awed voice, asked
DO you just get In the water?
Sure, was the answer.
THE guest hesitated, rather EN-
barrassed, and then said:
Could you l9an me a bathing
suit2 / forgot mime
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1923-10-20
Of-arSunday

There's no telling how she'll run,
On four cylinders or one,
Thund'ring rattle o. rusty tin
Il can't hear you fer tn dim
Just bundle of old nerves,
Lordy how tn dern thing swerves!
Yet she gets you there-kerplunkl
'Howdy! Aunty, Bud an Unkw
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1923-10-20
II. S. SUPREME
JUDGES ARE
ONLY MEN
Times Writer DeIves Into
History of Nations High
est Court of Law.

Lowell Mellett of this papers Wash
ington staff. has made an extensive study
of the movement to curtail the power
of the Supreme Court. Mellett has writ
ten series of articles giving the out
standing incidents in the courts his
tory This is the first article
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1923-10-20
Old Stuff for Daughter

Think of it. Dorothy! Artificial
lightning at lastl Without the slight.
est effort / can knock a man coldi"
You poor old dear. was born
knowing how TO dc that. Judge.
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1923-10-20
Johnny Corrects Mother

Johnny. you've been fighting again
and lost all your teeth
Nav" got EN- all in my pocket"
Santa Fe New Mexican.
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1923-10-20

How Is honey Ice cream made?
One pint milk, yolks eggs, l cup
honey, pint cream. Heat the milk in
a double boiler Beat together the
honey and eggs. add the hot milk, re-
turn the mixture to the double boiler,
and cook 1t until 1t thickens. Add the
cream and when the mixture is cool.
freeze It.
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1923-10-20
Announcing
a New Service


Fathers and mothers who are ambitious
for their children's success are offered an
easy, comprehensive plan of providing for
a college education through our Educa-
tional Trust Fund.
If your child is under IA, this plan will
appeal to you because it will obviate the
danger of your boy or girl being obliged
to go through life handicapped by lack
of education.
Our educational plan has been endorsed
by college presidents, teachers and others
who are equipping children for bigger,
broader and more useful lives
It is solution of the financial problem
of education. It answers the question:
"Where will the money come from7" that
will confront you in few years. 1t leads
to a definite goal that will assure to your
child the advantages of an education
one thing nobody can take away.
The Educational Trust Fund is de-
scribed in our booklet, ''Will Your Child
Go to College?" which we want every
parent to read. Call or write for the free
booklet.
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1923-10-20
Indiana
Sunshine

Cheer up, it's getting warm again
down South" Motorcycle Policeman
Henry Borgess., Evansville. appeared
recently with a violet pinned on the
lapel of his coat. Blue violets are
blooming in my back yard" he
claimed
Answering a call to the home Of
Henry Glatzel, Martinsville fire trucks
became stalled in the mud. The big
truck was forsaken while a boy who
saw the fire started put out the blaze.
Then the correspondents adds, what
damage there was wasn't enough to
be estimated Evidently It was one
exciting night.
It rained so hard in Alexandria re-
and fowls of various kinds, provided
them with rubber boots, raincoats and
umbrellas At least that is what q
resident claims Why not save all the
trouble and provide them with house
boats:
Mayor Mullins of Boonville informed
the city council that the water sit
uation was getting serious and that
he was going to issue a proclamation
TO water consumers to conserve the
supply In less than five hours after
the mayor made his statement II
started raining and thirty-six hours
later it was still pouring.
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1923-10-20

AT LEAST Secretary Work honest about this
land offered to exsodiers for homesteading What
land is t he says, 'the question itself
left after century picking by of other
by hundreds of thousands of the early pioneers who
to build future homes and future words
mostly and nothing moreuptl Uncle puts
OF is
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1923-10-20

What is the 'check-ofr'' in the
mining industry?
The system by which union dues.
fines and assessments are deducted
from the pay of the miners by the
employers. and paid direct to the
union treasurers
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1923-10-20

FORESTS of the United States estimated be worth
81 100000 at lumber prices Of all the standing
timber in the country 70 of the virgin timber
privately and 30 cent by the Government while of the
ond growth So cent publicly owned Let's the
ond growth from the expoters
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1923-10-20

Did any Roman Catholics sign
the Declaration Of Independence?
Yes. Charles Carroll of Carrollton
Md
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1923-10-20
Chcicy

NFIuIt1
What kind Of coal do you wish.
madam"
Dear me. 1 am SO inexperienced in
such things. Are there several kinds?"
"Oh. yes: we have egg coal. chest
nut"
II think III take the egg coal. We
have eggs oftener than we have
chestnubs. Boston Transcript.
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1923-10-20
A Thought

Woe unto them that are wise in
their own eyes. ami prudent In their
own sight.-Isa. sci
+ who thinks he can find in
IHI himself the means of doing
G9 without others is much mis-
taken; but he who thinks that others
cannot do without him is still more
mistaken.-La Rochefoucauld.
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1923-10-20
Q U z s T I o N 8
ASk-The Times
N s w E r s

You can get an snBwer 10 any ques-
ton OF fact or information by writing
10 the indianapolis Times Washington
Bureau. 1922 New York Ave. Wash
ington, d. c., enclosing . cents in
stamps for reply. Medical legal and
marital advice cannot be given. nor
can extended research be undertaken.
All other questions viii receive a per
sonal reply. Unsigned requests cannot
be answered. All letters are confden-
ual-Editor
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1923-10-20

When and why was Edith Ca
veil executed by the Germans?
Edith Cavell an English nurse, head
Of nurses training school in Brus-
sells. was accused Of utilizing her po-
sition to assist in the escape of Bel
gian, French and British soldiers from
Belgium, and was shot by the Ger
mans on Oct. IL, 1915.
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1923-10-20

WOMAN in Snohomish County, Washington walked fifty
four plus miles her kitchen last year Shouldn't the kitchen
apron be changed to hiker's OUTFIT
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1923-10-20
Whct a Dean of an East
ern University Says
About Our Educational
Trust Fund

81 have read carefully your
educational savings plan which
is published under the title,
VIII Your Child Go to College,"
II think it is in every way
the best plan | know to encour-
age parents of limited incomes
to provide we'll in advance, with
the least waste and the most
certainty for giving their chill
dren a college education-the
best thing a promising boy or
girl can have, next to good
health and a clean character.
Il wish your plan the highest
success"
The Educational Trust Fund
was inaugurated by our or
ganization. Booklets and ad-
vertising matter were written
by our publicity staff and
produced under our direc-
ton for our exclusive use.
Copyright, 1923,
BANKERS TRUST
COMPANY,
INDIANAPOLIS
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1923-10-20
Shifts in Seat

Next to Holmes is McReynolds, long
faced and saturnne and quite a bit
bald. balder than any Of the others,
II. fact, though younger than most of
them and Unger-looking. He isn't
quite comforlab in his seat for some
reason and shifts about a great deal,
straining all the time to maintain at
tention.
Then comes Sutherland, one of the
new members. CTe like Sanford,
sitting at his. left, was appointed by
President Harding with Butler, alb
sent today, and Chief Justice Taft,
there are four Harding appointees
among the nine) Sutherland is Civ
ing very serious attention to the pa
pers before him, presumably the same
brief the other judges are reading
from time to time His still newer col
league, Sanford. is not. If you didn't
know it to be impossible you'd sus-
pect that Sanford is wearied to
death. He squirms about in his chair.
rests his head sidewise against the
back and, at times, nibbles the ends
of his fingers. And he whispers to
the serious Justice Sutherland
Much Whispering
There is whispering likewise at the
other end of the bench, where Van
Devanter of Cheyenne, Wyo.. sits
next to Brandeis Of Boston Brandeis
smiles, as If at what he himself is
saying; Van Devanter. not amused
or SO 1t seems at this distance The
Brandeis smile is notable; sad, not
cynical; merely tinctured perhaps by
regret that the world is not intelli-
gent.
There they sit. AS dignif1ed and
intelligent, as high-purposed and sim
cere a group of 5urists as are to be
found in a.ny country. They represent
great power, the greatest in some
ways among all American forces,
greater certainly than similar courts
in other lands, for they can and do
set aside the will of the people, as
expressed by the peoples direct repre-
sentatives. Yet, you can't escape the
conclusion that they. too. are Just
men
All Have Health
AS good n group Of judges, no
1oubt, as ever has graced this bench
In one respect, at least, a better group
han some that have preceded them
COR they still have their health ane
mental alestiess, whereaswell, lister
to this:
During the hearing Of some Of the
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1923-10-20

WHAT is worth having is worth paying for says Henry
Ford which ntmaon that he intends give
away.
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1923-10-20

Is the word "aborts" In this
sentence correct: Typhoid fever
sometimes aborts?"
Yes, the word abort" can be used
In this way 1t means to fail to de
velop, hence to cease.
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1923-10-20

Should a hostess take part in
the games she provides for her
guests?
Yes, especially If cards are played
That is, of course, If the guests ar,
all provided for.
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1923-10-20

What is a vegetable peach:
A type OF muskmelon. used almost
entirely for picking purposes 1t is
smaller than an ordinary muskmelon,
and has a smooth skin.
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1923-10-20
HENRY TAKES TO POLITICS

URRAH The fight for Muscle Shoals has been lifted
of the realm of economic and engineering thought
ferred to the of practical politics.
The Gorgas plant recently sold by Secretary Weeks the
Alabama Power Company the protest Henry Ford
not have been absolutely Henry successful operation
of that gigantic underakng-ndeed impartial experts
declared.
But Henry longer thinking in of cold science
economies He knows that this and has
the the fight He this Of the secretary of
sinister and attack the rights of the people
of the country
Weeks longer the representative of the Coolidge
Administration In he has become he
in politics for pastme
Away with this talk of eectrons What the Hulk
eyan of extraction of naes from the crcumnambent
air? We know not neither do two whoops.
But ong Mr.. Weeks matured the plan break up
dispose of Muscle Shoals by piecemeal!'
Ah speak language, and re with you Henry from
the rock ribbed of Maine the vinecad slope
california;
The Boston Bond Broker The people led by their
gallant fvver king of Detroit Does doubt the
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1923-10-20

Is It true that hair and nails
grow on human bodies after
death9
In answer to this we can only give
the following extract from "Anoma-
les and Cur1osities Of Medicine" by
George Gould and Walter Pyle (pub-
lished by w. B. Saunders. Phnadel-
phia, Pa. 1896: 1--WE occasionally see
evidence OF this in dissecting rooms.
Caldwell mentions q person buried
four years; the hair protruded at the
points where the Joints OF the coffin
had given way. the hair of the head
measured eighteen inches, that OF the
beard eight inches. and on the breast
four to six inches. Rosse Of Wash
ington also cites case In a Wash
ington cemetery of a girl ~ to 10
years of age. who. when exhumed.
was found to have a new growth of
hair all over her body. Nails some.
times grow several inches after death,
and there is an account Of an idiot
who had an ldiosyncrasy for long
nails. and after death the nails were
found to have grown TO such an ex.
palms and soles.''
Who is the present worlds
heavyweight wrestling champion?
Ed (Strangler) Lewis.
What States produce the most
wheat7
North Dakota and Kansas.
How many times does the word
sprinkle" appear in the Bible?
Sprinkle" appears to be mentioned
eleven times, and shrinking" four
| times.
What is a vegetable peach:
A type OF muskmelon. used almost
entirely for pickling purposes. 1t is
smaller than an ordinary muskmelon
and has smooth skin.
Is the word "aborts" In this
sentence correct: Typhoid fever
sometimes aborts?"
Yes, the word abort" can be used
In this way. 1t means to fail to de
velop, hence to cease.
Should a hostess take part in
the games she provides for her
guests?
Yes, especially If cards are played
That is, Of course, If the guests are
all provided for.
When and why was Edith Ca
veil executed by the Germans?
| Edith Cavell, an English nurse, head
Of nurses training school in Brus.
sells. was accused Of utilizing her pc
sition to assist in the escape of Bel
gian, French and British soldiers from
Belgium, and was shot by the Ger.
mans on Oct. IL, 1915.
How Is honey Ice cream made?
One pint milk, yolks eggs, / CUP
honey, pint cream. Heat the milk in
double boiler Beat together the
honey and eggs. add the hot milk, re-
turn the mixture to the double boiler
and cook 1t until 1t thickens. Add the
cream and when the mixture is cool
! freeze It.
Did any Roman Catholics sign
the Declaration Of Independence?
Yes, Charles Carroll of Carrollton
Md.
Of-a-Sunday
There's no telling how she'll run,
On four cylinders or one,
Thund'ring rattle o. rusty tin
II can't hear you fer tn dim
| Just bundle of old nerves
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1923-10-20

How many times does the word
sprinkle" appear in the Bible7
Sprinkle" appears to be mentioned
eleven times, and "strinkling" four
times.
The Indianapolis times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1922-1965, 1923-10-20
BY LOWELL MELLETT

e NJ YEA! 0 yea! o yea! All
IL persons having business be-
E--i fore the Honorable the
Putnam patriot., 1923-09-14
BIRTHDAY PARTY
ara &iiiisn Jsiiy Ia Honosed By
 Her Relatives and FYi~nos

TAs sZna birthday anniversary of Mra William Jolly Of Nil street Nas celebrated Saturday. ssas st her horne. wbere many relatives and friends gathered to s2rpr.se her Many beautiful RlfGs were received bg hey fren her nzmeFe2s Ne.i-Elsf- era.
 Whist wzs played. the frst prize for tae women being won by &rs- 4 stoekdaie of Worcester. second prlEe by arz Joseph Gaertin. SF.. and con solatioa prize bg Mrs Aibert Marloa- The afas prize for the men went Co Jeseph Guersin. Sr. second prize t9 Josept Brodegr and consolation prize te Henry IAsgssiefe. keffests nents were served 1y tne h0stess dur ing the evening A iz 9'cI0ek toast vas gwen e Nrs Jolly. and soon fke guests depafsad. delighted Nith the evening" su. ogHaefit=
 Among the out-sf=tg x8ests were Hrs. stoekaaie and Mf and Nu 4 Marin ef Worcester. close frisnas sf Mrs Jolly
 One of the unusual gifts was loaf of braided bread three feet long wItt a miniature loaf attached to f. gwen by 4 Mafan Of Worcester
Putnam patriot., 1923-09-14
EVENING SCHOOL PLANS
Win Open In October With Lewis r
 Bsttey as Principal

The evening schools of the town of Putnam will open in October, definite date to be announced soont with practically the same classes as last year. Lewis r Bsttey will again be principal and also be American ization Director.
 Last year there were l3s pupils registered in all the classes of the Putnam Evening school. and il is hop ed that the number this year vii. surpass that of last year.
 The cost of the evening schools was Ss95 co for special teachers and g. 46 for books, making g total of ss9T i6 for the year l92i-22 Last year the cost was s1.073 6l for teachers; Sfl. 4e for books. s675 for stationery and supplies; $500 for operation of school plant and S4 25 for maintenance. mak- ing total of St.i01 or for the school year l922-23, or an increase Of S20S.6f
Putnam patriot., 1923-09-14
DEMOCRATS NOMINATE
Putnaz Party 1emb~rs Sasae Can
 Ssdatea For Ts~s Offs<~s

Tkere were 10 esntss4s st trs democratic caBc1s held 9f the &2na- eInai h1iIding. Putnam. Tges.1zy eve nIng. zli caneidztes beng ae-i1ats.a hy exclamation Former Mayer q J McGarry presided ard George Pot yin served ss elsrx. As interesting event sf the czse1s Nss the 1on1n4 ton Of Iosepa L. Ryan. elerk sf shs Chamber of Commerce. as Is1 col seet0r. A sseh be- wih oppose A. tornsy Irving F. Nirou, rsp1o. .lean candidate for the sesee.
 Ths lis2 Of party candidates ls as foliawH. seleetsnan. Alfred BonnsT1 ls assessor. Edmond DuDeiss board of re- lief. xrs. EHEabet1 NeIiss clsfk ard trsassrer and agent of town esposIf fund Davie Flsgg ag0ftef, J. Harry Mann. eorKsabses. 0regere Tc1ets cite. Aipsorse Be4zaolell Armand Trahan. Napoleon Bizsien; rs2zsiFaE of voters, George P9tTins tsSn school comm 51tee. James J Gs.zFsas. E.sss-sFsa Bertkiaume. library direeterA Der. rard J BcGzrry. ?. ] Ryan. Afs EKiila e. Mare