Milford chronicle., 1923-09-28
HOW CHILDREN LEARN EASE OF
MANNER
By Edith Lochridge Reid

A mother remarked the other day
IN the course of a conversation on
child discipline, 81 don't see why it is
that my children always act worse
when we have guests than at any
other time. I'm sure it isn't because
they haven't been instructed how to
behave"
Now this mother was perfectly sin
cere in her remark, yet her own
phrasing contains the secret of her
: distress over her children's behavior.
Would child learn to play the piano
by being instructed if he didn't prac-
tice playing every day? Yet that
mother was expecting just as improb-
| able performance in behavior. She
was stressing the old idea. of "com-
pany manners" and expecting the
children to put on culture just as they
put on clothes for the dinner party.
And because they didn't she was deep
ly- grieved and disappointed.
The reason why children of this
type act worse when there are guests
than they do ordinarily is because of
strain and nervous tension. In the
mothers anxiety to have affairs move
smoothly she has held out threats as
to what will happen if all the last !
minute "Don'ts" aren't observed, and
the result has been to create an I'M |
natural condition that is confusing
and disastrous to poise and courtesy.
But aside from the mothers en-
barrassment over slips of etiquette
and behavior, this idea of putting on
is very unwise training for
children. They gradually learn to act
on artificial motives and lose sight of
the genuine and vital character traits
that are worth while and lasting.
Just the idea of alluding to the var
lous articles of table appointments as
company silver" and guest linen,"
and so on, through all the china and
glassware, suggests to the child a
feeling of stiffness, and an atmosphere |
formal and conventional, though he
1oes not analyZe it in just those
erms.
Why not use the good dishes and
inen and silverware occasionally for
lust the home folks? Then daughter
4ois will not cause a panic when there
ire guests by piping up, 90, goody,
We have the fruit in the best hand
tainted bowl" If the little ones be-
ONE accustomed every day to what
S good enough for guests, a great
eal of strain for both parents and
hildren is bound to be eliminated.
Right in line with this follows the
act that the place to start preparing
he child in company manners" is the
rst day ne sits in his high chair to
at meal. There is no need for tot
ven his age to throw his spoon and
racker on the floor continually, or to
pset his broth or porridge. He may
well learn right then not to stand
in his chair, not to put his face
OWN in his plate and not to scream
" what he can't have. This much at
asst can then be omitted from the
Instructions" when the Browns come
-er to dine few years later.
When mother is alone and playing
Ith the babies she can teach them
UGH by pretending visitors. They
ay come in and call on her and ad-
nee and take her hand. 1t will be-
me natural in very short time.
A mother who includes good man
rs and polite behavior in the every
y home life, will never have reason
force courtesy upon her children.
Gold Not All From Gold Mines.
A large part of the gold produced In
} United States comes from by
,duofe In. Copnor and Iaod vofrn.