The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-01-30
The Torch Bearer

We are filled with the spirit of coop eration And when we say filled, we do not mean that our capacity is small. For example, we desire to cooperate with the bordahelth. While they are fighting the mosquitoes we will help out against the flies.
 We note that when we leave our windows l open the flies come in. We swat them. More come. And this process continues in- definitely. There is a steady procession of flies, particularly when the weather has been mild for few days. Eventually, we presume, all the flies in Birmingham would come this way if we are patient.
 Our plan, therefore, is simple but effec- tive We will swat the flies as they come, and by and by there will be none left Science is cold, calculating, mathematical, I far removed from the foibles and humors of human life But when a number of scien- can turn out enough material in one day to keep colyum conductors busy for a month. Gloom
 In wonder narrow alleyway,
 Where ash cans stand in disarray,
 It is dismal sight to see
 The remnants of a Christmas tree. i Golf, as They Say, Is Rich Mans Game Dear Sir-The careful A. P. at last con- firms the rumor that bankers play golf. | To wit:
 CORRECTION, WASHINGTON, Dec 2s. EDITORS: In federal reserve bank state ment make total golf reserve $3,040, ,439 c. J. M
 The gent who asks Why do women talk so much more than men?" has never listened to the United States Senate.
 We note that there is a call for more judges in various Jefferson county courts Haven't the present judges got rested up yet?
 The telephone company, after consider able maturity of delberation, and after re- slnctful and unhurried consultation with the public service commission, is on the point cf installing more telephones in the newer parts of this city. If we were in that bus mess, we should take 1t as matter of course that the more phones the more busi- ness, and the more business the more in- come That shows how we lack the busi- ness instinct
 We'd think the telephone company would do anything to create talk.
 On the other hand, the gas company hesi- tates to put in extensions to new districts because of small question of who shall pay for it, or how the cost shall be divided. The company doesn't want anybody to feel 1 that the company considers them as objects of it's charity. No thousan. times no i! The company would let them pay all of it rather than that they should feel that way about it.
 Following the example of the movies and baseball the Associated Dress Industries of America have elected Czar, endowed with plenary powers. One word from him and the girls will wear what they please.
 THIS MAKES US FEEL BETTER
 Dear Torch Bearer: In your column read this: "These facts I gather from the press, but what they're after can't guess, although the papers lift the mists and say they,re 'herpetologists.' There may be some wise guys, tis true, who know what these humdingers do, but as for me, I'm all at sea about this herpetology."
 I append this: "Well, what if you don't get the gist? know it to be fact that even well-informed herpetologist is part of his time at sea while studying herpetol- ogy" DEXTER HOOD.
 There being no royal road to happiness, common folks are just as apt to get there as kings.