davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1923-01-24


/ Oil Company buying the Sphinx, sur
rounding it with red pumps and renting
space to tire and accessory dealers.
4 motor car caravan crossed the west
ern Sahara Desert recently in 20 days.
The trip was such Il success all the
SheikS threw away their horses and put
in orders for Ford runaboutS.
Great CONSERVATION was caused
among the camels, however, most Of
which got 50 frightened they shed their
humps. \ camel can go eight days
without water admittedly, but from now
on it can't be expected to go more than
Il couple of hours without smelling-salts
and other IetsOratives.
The wise camel drivers Immediately
resigned and started taking up courses
in How to Become Chauffeur in
Eight Lessons" Those that fail can
become Egyptian traffic cops.
The khedive has started framing au-
tOmObile laws. One-way traffic will
prevail around the Pyramids and any
autOist parking in front of King Tut
khahamen'S tomb more than fifteen
minutes VIII bN litbit W al
before the Egyptian traffic court.
Camels found guilty of crossing the
desert except at designated crossings
will be dealt with severely.
1t won't be necessary for explorers
to dig for buried Egyptian kings who
have slept for 5000 years. With taxi
cabs rattlinG around them they're sleep
ing days will be over and they'll come
out of their tOmbS voluntarily.
\ moving picture has just been re-
leased in this country showing wild ami
mails being hunted in the heart of the
African jungle from flivvers. The views
show Ford ears chasing herds of gi.
raffes. wart-hOgs, gnus, etc, until the
animals slow up from sheer exhaustion
and practically surrender. A hyena is
depicted actually being bumped by a
Ford and a lion is shown regarding it
in error.
According to reports lions and tigers
bit some OF the machines, but had to
pass them up as indigcstible.
Ford is now at work on car which
ne VIII guarantee 10 give u lions TO
the gallon.
UncOnfirmed reports say an African
lion swallowed a flivver few weeks
ago. He forgot to shut off the engine
however, and shook to death in fifteen
minutes.
Hunters cut the lion open. took out
the Ford. and found it still running and
as good as new. As n matter of fact
n Ford is better after 4 fight with a
lion; it improves with rough treatment
All Of which has thoroughly cowed
the lions to a point where they are
Obeying traffic signs hung up in the
jungle reading: LIONS AND OTHER
SLOW-MOVING TRAFFIC KEEP
TO THE EXTREME RIGHT"
Copyright, 1929, by the Associated
NcwspapCrs.)
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1923-01-24

Ner unUer UlSCUS-
sion. 1t was all
m ore in sorrow
than in anger.
THAT girl is
silly" declared
one.
80 silly she'll
yer graduate"
asserted another.
"NeYer mind i" re-
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1923-01-24

the shop and asked Tor some bird
seed. ..a
All" grinned the clerk, "you can't
kid me. Birds are Matched from eggs"
The teacher had been working hard
in order to impress few elementary
geographical facts upon her rather
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1923-01-24

San AntOnian Locates in YOakum.
YOaium. TEX, Jan. GA. i. Far
ris of San Antonio, has arrived here
and will open a wholesale and retail
coffee and tea establishment in the
Green & WeIhauSen building on Lott
street. The business is now being
arranged for an early opening.
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1923-01-24

duH pupils. AT the
end of the lesson
she asked a few
questions.
"Now. Johnny"
she said, what is
London noted for y
1T is noted for
its stupidity. miss"
answered Johnny,
more brightly than
lISual
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1923-01-24
Where to Go

Vaudeville.
Majestic: Vaudeville and pictures.
Stock.
Royal: Edna Park and her players
in Turn to the Right"
Motion Pictures.
RialtO: Fools First"
Empire: "OutCast."
Princess: Lights of New York
Luncheon Clubs.
Thursday.
CITY Club at the Gunter.
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1923-01-24

"Phwat's that yer
wroitin'. Tim 2" she
inquired.
I'm maxim a list
of all the men in
this street as l can
knock the stuffin'
out Of" replied
Tim.
Having rlnncnd at
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1923-01-24

Whatever makes you think that?'
inquired the teacher.
why, miss" was the reply, ''yOu
said yourself that the population Of
London is very dcnse."
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1923-01-24

visiting Portsmouth, to call ON the
prince. The ambassador accordingly
donned his court regalia and was
pulled off to the ship. Arriving ON
board, the ambassador introduced him
self TO the midshipman at the gang
way and announced that he desired an
audience with His Serene Highness.
Ernest Leopold Victor Charles Au-
guste Joseph Erich, Prince Won Lem
ingen. The midshipman was momen-
tarily dazed by this bombardment but,
coming to, understanding dawned upon
him and, going over to the open gun
room skylight, he called out: Hi.
Sausage, you great fat slug! Here's
a blokc in gold waistcOat wants to
see you"
The fair coed was fair, indeed, but
to her lessons gave no heed. On the
campus a group of female Juniors had
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1923-01-24

The French troops in the Ruhr have
arrested six mine owszSs and post
master. The first thing thcy know, the
French will have more prisoners to feed
than they can pay for with the coal they
seize.
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1923-01-24
A Laugh or Two

Tim Houlihan had been busy with a
pencil and paper for some time. and
his wife could restrain her curiosity
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1923-01-24

Our idea is that Uncle Sam ought to
put his war claims in the hands OF a
good collection agency.
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1923-01-24

marked a third, "she won't need to-"
There was a big flutter over this.
"Why nOt?" chimed the chorus,
"One of the professors is going to
marry her." "r
For Joke man asked a young
clerk in seed shop for some sweet
potato seeds. The clerk could find
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1923-01-24

the list. Mrs. Houlihan went out to do
some shopping. She met Mrs. Leary,
whose husbands name was on Tins
list. What passed between the two Ia
dies will never be known, but in about
twenty minutes Pat Leary burst into
the Houlihan's room.
"Oi hear we've got list of men We
think We can thrash, and me own
names on it, roared Leary.
p "Oi have
But We can't lick me, ye red-headed
son of gum" stormed Leary, now
thoroughly incensed.
Thin OH take yer name of" said
the obliging Tim, reaching for his
pencil.
In the old days of amity between
tho British and German nmnireS q
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1923-01-24

See the Pyramids now. Before they
turn them into gasoline and free-air
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1923-01-24
The Once Over
by II. I. PHILLIPS.

The automobile has invaded the Sa
lara Desert and the African jungle.
Proving that the auto salesman is no
die jester VIXEN he says This buggy
will take you anywhere
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1923-01-24
SUBSTITUTION RATES.

II important, when desiring the address OF YOU
paper cnHnged. to give old and new addresses
should dSvery he Irregular, please notify the office
g'elephone Crockett 1859.
The Antonio Light on sale at hotels and new
stands throughout the United States.
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1923-01-24

Already there is talk of the Standard
Oil Company buying the Sphinx, sur
it with red pumps and renting
space to tire and accessory dealers.
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1923-01-24

trained as midship-
men in the royal
navy, Prince Won
Leiningen of Prus-
STA among others.
The king of Prus-
STA wishing to COM
municate with his
young relative. in
structed his ambas-
Sadnr w Il q W nS
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1923-01-24

In the old days of amity between
the British and German empires a
number of Teutonic princelings were
San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1923-01-24

\ motor car caravan crossed the west
rrn Sahara Desert recently in 20 days.
The trip was such a success all the
sheikS threw away their horses and put
in orders for Ford runabOutS.
New Britain herald., 1923-12-26
Observations OR Te Weather

Washington Dec. 26.-(Forecast for southern, New England) - Fair and slightly colder tonight Thursday fair; moderate to fresh west and northwest winds, diminishing and shifting to easterly Thursday.
 Forecast for eastern New York: Fair and somewhat colder tonight, Thursday increasing cloudiness; diminishing northwest winds becom- ing east and southeast Thursday.
 For Connecticut; Fair and slightly colder tonight; Thursday fair; moder- ate to fresh west and northwest winds diminishing and shofting to easterly Thursday.
 Conditions: \ disturbance which passed out the St. Lawrence valley last night caused snow furries in the eastern portion of the Lake region and New England. IL is followed by an area of high pressure which is pro- ducing pleasant weather this morning in all sections east of tho Mississippi river The temperature is low in the southern sections.
 Conditions favor for this vicinity fair weather with freezing tempera- tnre at night but thawing during the day.
 For New Britain and vicinity: Fair tonight and Thursday, somewhat colder tonight. westerly winds dimin- ishing and shifting 10 oasterly on Thursday.
New Britain herald., 1923-12-26
Nf.W ELEPHANTS RATING

New Britain people are somewhat
 that the New England insurance EN-
 change has found it to be Class E
 Not only New Britain people but pco-
 pie in other towns and cities of the
 their praise of our fire department.
 Moreover the examiners themselves they were to stamp our department as perfect. in all respects. still they would he forced to classify the city as below perfection.
 The matter is worked out on q system of points" Very good. But there iS this element in the report that gives rise to considerable question. It would seem that this Insurance EX- change should be very soicitous about the city's condition in the mat ter of fire protection. Well, it was d long time ago that an investigation was made. Now comes the report tell ing Ills how far short we are of good protection. Awful, isn't it? And even now when We are told of the terrible situation, the letter Of the Exchange only promises at some future date to tell us exactly how we may make the necessary changes It says there is water trouble. fire alarm trouble building and fire department. Then It says just as soon as the final re- port is published by the national board we intend to specify to the city of New Britain just what recom- mendations contained in that report are necessary for a Class A rating.
 And meantime we will go along paying Class B rates, suffering the terrible worry of being a Class B city. Well. personally we are inclined to feel that our fire protection Is pretty good and we have the conviction that our record of fire loss will show that such protection has been very good we do not figure this matter on theoretical points. Neither is there cause for astonishment in the finding of the exchange. Why should it take an action which would reduce rates?
New Britain herald., 1923-12-26

and this latest evidence of wars effect
 is in the form of two children who have just taken their own lives. A boy of l7 years hanged himself few days ago and the next day at the same spot his IA year old brother took his own life in the same manner This not unusual self destruction among children is aScribed, says the report, to neurotic precocity resulting from conditions under which they passed their infancy in war times. The sights the suffering. the thoughts that came with the tragedy of war have made these children old and sad and weary before their time. In the childhood hours that should be filled with joy and happiness and freedom from care, sorrow anguish and overmastering worry came upon them. Now, when the air is cleared. they can not feel the change. Like old men and women, worn out with life's amending strug ges, they seek peace in oblivion. That is war,
New Britain herald., 1923-12-26
\ PERMANENT TREE

As We hope the celebration of Christmas will remain a permanent feature of New Britain, so The Herald feels that the tree which embodies the essence Of the YuIetide spirit should be made q permanent feature of Cen tral Park, instead of placing a tempor- ary tree there every year.
 Comment has been made upon the many growing trees that were decor Rted this year by their owners. giving pleasure to all who might pass. How much more fitting would lt not he to have the city transplant a great tree, perhaps from Walnut Hin park. set it in Central Park. there to remain from year 10 year to be truly living thing, gathering about it the senti- ment Of tradition, and shining. each year as we grow older with that tree, with the freshly placed lights that represent the spirit of the day.
 From a practical point of view there would be saved the sixty dol lars or so that the new tree costs each year. And from a practical point of view, too, the labor Of placing if on the park would he saved. It would be tended. that tree, as something owned by all Of Us: something with which each of Us would have per sonai association. From year to year the sentiment for that tree-that par ticular tree would become stronger as the years passed over its head and strengthened its physical limbs as time strengthened its hold upon our hearts
 Next Christmas may the children Of Now Britain gather about a Christmas tree growing from thc earth, strong fin ifs place in that earth a. Il will grow strong in thr place II wDl hold in our hearts.
New Britain herald., 1923-12-26
g Fears Ago Today
Taken rom Herald of that date


 Joseph H. Clark and Arthur W. lpson were declared morally quail fled for admission to the Hartford bar at a meeting of the bar association meeting yesterday.
 Thomas Coleman. a brakeman, is at his home on High street with a badly injured shoulder, the result of q fall from car.
 The local constables stated today that they had not been spoken to up to the present time concerning the collection of the military tax.
 William A. Dehm will spend the holidays at the home of his parents in this city. He is a graduate of the New Britain high school and also of Lchigh university and is now holding a responsible position with the Min ing and Electrical Construction Co. of Wilkcsbarre, Pa.
 R. F. Gaffney has qualified as a justice of the peace it was announced this morning.
 D. Y. Edwards is preparing to move his house on Smalley street to the lot at the corner of East Main and Olive streets. Mir. Edwards Smalley street property has been sold to the Fairview cemetery association.
 Washburn's big double minstrels will be seen at two performances at the Lyceum next Wednesday.
New Britain herald., 1923-12-26
GET YOUR MARKERS

Each year it becomes necessary to remind ourselves that with the com ing of January 1 new markers for motor vehicles must he affixed to cars if they are to be operated. Year be- fore last the police were allowed to be bit lenient in regard to making arrests of those persons who, for one reason or another, did not have the new markers. Last year the rule that new markers were necessary after the first of the year, was attempted to be more strickly enforced. This year, ac- cording to word from the motor vehi- cIe department a large force has been at the capitol in order to get the markers out and 10 give every one a chance to get them so that there may be no good excuses for failure.
 The 1924 markers go into effect at December 3l, and the per sons operating motor vehicles with 1923 markers after that time will be liable to arrest. The motor vehicle department will not ask the police to extend the period for use Of old mark CTS,
 Of course all who can do so should try to present themselves at the office in Hartford. or the nearest branch office in Bridgeport. New Haven, New London or Waterbury as the case may be. as early in the morning as possible and as soon as possible, On the last lays the long lines Of applicants bring necessary disappointment to many when they find they cannot get the |, markers at the last minute. The natter is emphasized because of tho 1 many disappointments that come each | ear Get your markers.
New Britain herald., 1923-12-26
WAR AND CHILDREN

II may bs said that the csu Of uar has been sufficiently emphasized: Chat ths v.0rse than Tolls aF it is generally rcc5gaizs8. This is mot true Enough can never t4 said about the tragedy of war as Ioiz ss it remains 2 possibility. is long as preparstions for it have 70 be made. as long as t8ere exist people wha do not sae the grrst wisdom of meeting more than haIf way sil nations who would put a stop 10 it
 Today comes tbe nsus Of a feature Of the horror Of war that has not been sufficiently emphasized. From Austria comes Uord that child suicide again has resaited from effects Of the Har. self destruction hy children has become common since the war.
New Britain herald., 1923-12-26
CONTRIBUTED
The Winter Months Begin


 By JAMES SHEPARD The fall has passed us gently by While summer fingered near. And waited with a cheerful air Till winter time was here. December brings the shortest days We have throughout the year. And somewhere near the twentieth Short days are always here. This year. tine nineteenth Of the
 month
 Our shortest days began Continuing for full nine days All of an equal span. No shortest day Of all the year Can ever come around, In nine short days Of equal length, No shortest day is found. Iris said that winter months begin Within onr shortest days And why should not the winter
 months
 Take on their winter ways? Yet when our shortest days expand To days Of great length. We may expect the winters cold To show increasing strength.
New Britain herald., 1923-12-26
THEY REPRESENT Us

The third of the men who are to aid
 in the attempt 10 settle tho separations
 matter has been appointed. Like
 Charles G. Dawes and owen D. Younp
 this man. Henry N, Robinson appears
 10 be the sort of man to do efficiently
 his share of the important work. Mir,
 Dawes is a man Of fhance; Mr. Young is q man Of the younger generation accustomed to great affairs and to the dealing with the human problems;
 Mr. Robinson is lawyer Of ability.
 His win be the duty Of looking into the German wealth held outside the country which may nave been carried away for the purpose Of relieving it from the burden Of bearing its share of the duty imposed upon ali German wealth.
 These men will be unofficial" Amer ican representatives on the two com- mitteos, the one which will look into Germany's capacity to pay, the other into the matter of capital held abroad. The government Of the United States is not responsible for them officially, in theory. They were not appointed by President Coolidge. Primarily they are men who are satisfactory to Europe, or who arc. more than that, Paris choice. Their theoretical position is that Of Americans aiding Europe with the favor Of the United States govern ment.
 But in practice these men do rcp- resent us. They represent the United States Of America in the broadcst sense Of the word Thnir attitude will be considered tbe attitudo or the I nitod states tho world over. What they do. the hefp they are able to give viii be considered help given by the nitcd States Therr is ncvcra chance of doing something worth while with ont there being intcrwovcn into that splendid opportunity thc chance Of disappointing the docr and those who look 10 tho actors for great results. The work these men wtIl do will have a far reaching ffcct. and their failure to do good work would possibly affect history. The very fact that the gov has favored the appointment Of such unofficial helpers for Europe. however is the most important step Of aM IT tho great good comes which may bo anticipated. trsm'udous ad- vance toward renoral international understanding wiU have been made. II lies in thc power of thos' men to prove. through wisdom. efficiency and high standards, 10 paint an ob- lert lesson from which opponents of Iho idea that we oro part Of the world aud have a duty to fhe world Hiii turn away in shamc, and sn object lesson .u which aii wHo brist' iu that 8giy. .hat necessity. zfH take profound sal sfaction.
New Britain herald., 1923-12-26
AND vow

While the Christmas trees arc still standing and before the candies have burned low. the impulse comes Ca express appreciation Of one aspect of the observance Of this festival which seemed, this year. Co be more pro- nounced than ever It was the evident thought for others as shown by the more general habit of Illuminating Christmas trees which stood outside the homs: or placing prettily decked trees close 10 the windows of the home when they were inside, and Of lighting the windows Of the homes or New Britain.
 Never before were thrre seen SO many Of these evidences Of inc spirit Of Christmas tn plain view for thosr who might chance to pass. 1t seemed gs though the people within. often seen sitting about other bits Of green and lighted corners of thc living rooms, wanted any stranger who pass cd the houso to share with them the Christmas spirit Df happiness and peace. Lights elowrd iu the darkness and those lights. outside. gave their warmth of feeling 10 ali. The resi- dentisl streets glowcI with them and in tho hearts of tho passers-by there was warmth inspired by this evident thought for them.
 And the lights in thn windows. and the trees thero-lirhts vlsrod for the beneht of strangers: trees srt. not in some distant room. tut iH plain view Of all who might look that way These customs are worthy of perpetuation, and t was splendid tJ see at this time. that whatever change has come to the people of this s.itr in their rndeav0r 10 keep abreast 0f changing times. changing thoueht there has come no decrease iu the esHrral thnughf Of others. Rather iHdred. has there come an intfusifyiug Of that thought which holds no setfshnass in the unpleasant senss Of the word. It vas Christmas time. Everyone see1nod Co long to pass On g bit of his 0r her joy in the bay.
 And this suggestion brings up the conviction That aE tht trees wIH rr- main standing for days. and Bs tHg spirit Of good viii to others wiI throw an atmosphere of kindliHsss over ar the hours Of this day and tJe days that will follow for a little time. whv may not that spirit be eontinaed al through ali the days 10 cotne-stii through the year which AiH be here soon: why may not that increasing good wiIl and eagerness 10 share Gife's happiness with others. inspire every one until. once again after another twelve months of endesvor. another Christmas shall come to renew the sentinent Of fellowship which gives