The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-10-23
Dorothy Dir's Letter Bor

Dear Miss Dix: Will you help desperately unhappy woman? I am a. married woman 35 years old and have been married for 14 years. 1 married a man l did not love because l was miserable at home. My hus- band is one of the finest men that ever lived, and has been everything that was good and kind to me, and I. lived happily until about a year ago. Then his cousin and I, quite without intention or our knowing it, realized suddenly that we were sdes- perately in love with each other. The other man is also splendid man and is married to woman who is one of my best friends. I love her . devotedly. and would not hurt her for the world, nor would I hurt my husband, whom I honor and esteem and to whom l am so grateful
 But, oh! Miss Dix, this other man { and l love each other so madly that < it is torture to us both. He has one ! child and have two, and all of them adore their daddies. What shall we do? Is it not better for us to suffer than to make the innocent wife, and husband suffer? What can we do? A VERY MISERABLE WIFE. Answer: In your unhappy predica- ment there is only one safe road to take, and that is a hard one forayou to travel. It will take courage for you to follow it. but it will eventually lead you to peace, and that is more than you will have if you daily along the primrose path.
 For you cannot build a house of happiness that will stand on a rotten foundation. You cannot take what you think is your own at the expense of other people without having it turn to dust and ashes in your hands. The love that you gratify at the price of disloyalty inevitably turns to hate.
 It is not an uncommon thing for men and women to break their matri- monia1 bonds, forsake their duty, de- fault on their obligations and fly away with their soulmates to what they think is going to be paradise of love. But they never find their elysiurns. Their illicit romance soon becomes sordid. Their passion burns itself out. They tire of each other and long for the responsibility they flouted, the children they gave up. the old home and the old scenes where they are ashamed to show their faces.
 The solution of your problem is for the man to take his family where he and you will not see each other daily. This will give both a chance to forget. Absence does dull the edge Of desire. Dreams fade out, and you can, at , least, put temptation out of reach. Certainly, you will only bring misery on yourselves if you break up two homes, orphan two lsets of children and wreck the lives of an innocent man and woman who have trusted you and been kind to you.
 6 DOROTHY DIX.
 Dear Miss Dix: DO you know any thing about matrimonial agencies?
 F. $. A.
 Answer: I do. For many years ] did repertorial work on big paper and in that time once wrote the ac- count, from day to day, of a grue- some murder trial in which a woman -s was proved to have murdered five men, whom she lured to her home by advertising in matrimonial agency paper for husband with a few thousand dollars to investin develop ing a good farm. She described her nice property, and when her victims rose to the bait she robbed them and killed them
 I also wrote the pitifu1 stories ot dozens of other women, school teach. CTS, milliners, servant girls-women who, by hard work and pinching economies, had saved up little
 
 growing old. and who had been trapped into bogus marriages witt men with whom they had gotten IT touch through some matrimonia agency. I remember one man who told.pe he had married fifty " onaer thatwway in order to get lns4r it, dollars.
 And wrote the stories that-youns girls told me, through their sobs, oi being trapped into white slavery through such means. It seemed SC romantic to them to get love letter: from man they had never seen and to meet him in a strange city and it was only when it was toe late they found that they had stumbled into the pit.
 And why, in heavens name, F. s A., do you want to get a husband or a wife by the mail-order route Aren't there any nice men and wom- en in the community in which you live? Don't you know that no re- spectable man or woman needs tc go out ofyhis or her own bailiwick to find mate? f!fF{ ~
 Why do you think that you would prefer 8 perfect stranger to some- body that you know? Surely, when one goes into a. life partnership, one HeeuS all the ueLdlfeQ lHtOFIndLlOn fHe or she can get about the party of the other part Matrimony is risky enough without tying up with some one whom you recognize only by the wearing of white carnation or the holding ofta red rose in his or her hands stg m
 Possiblys there are some good mat rimonial agencies, but the best of them are open to abuse. Walk warily and write circumspectively when you