davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-11-10
UNCLE EZRA
OBSERVES
BY La Monte Waldron.

BY La Monte WaIdrOr.
III PLUNKINs says he ANT no I
pessirnist but he thinks
~ ev'rythin' In this darn world
is wrong.
Spare the spank an spoil the
child is as good q motter as it
ever war.
Deke Spriggins says we ought
to have q new amendment now to
git rid of these here bootleggers.
Hank Bibbs says Politics amt
nothin' but schemin' an smokin'
bum cigars an he's glad he's out
Of EN-
The Teller what tries to carry
the huh world on his shoulders
don't git very far.
Ed Pixies boy, 81 has wrote to
the President aslin' him for a,
job. Foolishness always did run in
that family.
Some folks knows so tarnation
much that they amt got no con-
mon sense.
Ed Spiven's wife is gittin' 30
stylish that she amt got time to
wash the dishes no more.
The on'y way of keepin' from
bein' talked about down to the
village is to say nothin' bout no
body an don't do nothin' that no
body else does.
Charlie Hick, who has made
quite some success IN the city put !,
tin over his schemes on the wise
folks theres is back home for
visit an is patronizin' them that
didn't use to think he amounted to
much.
Son of Mrs. Fibbet. new head
Of the village reform society, is
"a terrible little scallawag. He run
night into the meetin' Of the
society an yelled. ma, I found
yer lipstick.
Band over to the Corners has
got a new drum major with one
Of them hats onto him that looks
like q tall muff an a stick with
a brass ball onto it. He cuts up
so many monkeyshines that folks
don't give the band much notice.
il any.
Jones' mule acts to me like one !.
Of these here boIsheviks rather
kick than git e gait on.
Jabez Peeps's boy Bill has made
him a radio out OF q couple Of tin
cans an some wire an stuff You
can't hear nothin' on it but it's
mighty clever contraption TO look
at.
Aunt Hannah Marian declares
that the gal what wears them red
shoes is flirtin' with Satan.
Jim DiDbs' car has broke down
ag'n. That's the fourteenth time
since last Spring an Jim says If
it keeps up he's gOin' to get
discouraged.
Ted Dilkins says that wives
that tries to boss their husbands
ought to be put stop to.
Cousin Molly Pipps says she's
worked so hard all her life she
amt never had chance to see
nothin'. Threatens to git mad
some day an take couple hours
off to see the train come In.
Grover Carberry Whittle's got
so he wears one of them one
eyed glasses on a string. Boys
down to the store says he always
was a queer fish, even when he
went down to the old swimmin'
hole.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-11-10

The on'y way Of keepin' from
bein' talked about down to the
village is to say nothin' bout no
body an don't do nothin' that no
body else does.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-11-10

Ed Pixies boy, 81 has wrote to
the President aslxin' him for a,
job. Foolishness always did run in
that family.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-11-10

The Teller what tries to carry
the huh world on his shoulders
don't git very far.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-11-10

Hank Bibbs says Politics amt
nothin' but schemin' an smokin'
bum cigars an he's glad he's out
Of EN-
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-11-10

Spare the spank an spoil the
child is as good q motter as ii
ever war.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-11-10

Deke Spriggins says we ought
80 have new amendment now to
git rid OF these here bootleggers.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-04-08
Adventists to Emphasize
Theological instruction

Methods OF education now in use
by Seventh Day Adventist Colleges
were severely criticised last night
by delegates attending the general
conference Of the executive commit
to in headquarters church. Takonla
Park.
1t was urged that more effort be
applied to teaching systems of re
ligious instruction and less to mat
ters irrelevant to theology. The
conference voted unanimously in
favor of a proposition to add to
the curriculum of all Adventist edu-
cational institutions a course to
train young men and women as
adopts in evangelistic-colport
work.
c. X. Meyers, associate secretary
of the general conference, who has
spent many years as a missionary
among the cannibals Of the SoutH
Seas, said that the distressing con.
dition of the world should be i'm.
pressed upon the students.
Approximately 10000 students at
tend schools Of this denomination.
]. L. Shaw, treasurer, reported
that an income Of $3,313,246.35 has
been recorded for the year en0.
ing January 20. Appropriations
throughout the year totaled $3.50.
1862. A balance of $1,705, $50. %
is still in the treasury.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-04-08
RANKS OF MUMMY
OWNERS ALARMED
Carnarvon Death Causes Haste
To Get Rid of
Antiques.
BY Universal Service.

LONDON, April THE cause Of
the death Of Lord Carnarvon in
Egypt is still the outstanding sub.
ject Of interest here.
An official OF the British Museum
admitted today that as a result Of
the peers tragic end many persons
are continuing to send into the
museum scaribs, josses, naummified
fingers and other accused things"
though, he contends. their fears are
groundless and absurd.
Sir Hall Caine said today:
II am waiting the full details Of
Lord Carnarvon's death before Civ.
ing my views Of any superstitious
conjectures Herewith"
Marie Corelli wired Universal
Service t,pday that she would not
talk. on the subject now, but would
later give her views on the tragic
death of Lord Carnarvon.
Sir Rider Haggard said he agreed
with a statement in the last letter
mics are such unpleasant things to
look upon that when science has
been satisfied the body Of King
Tut.Ankh.Amen should be allowed
to remain in the sarcophagus which
it had occupied for $3.50 years"
Sir Rider is insistent that while
scientists should rot emulate ghouis
there was absolutely no reason to
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-04-08
Hunt Youth Who Fled
From Police Station

Search continued throughout the
night for youthful Joseph E. Meri-
ca, SIG Seventh street southeast,
who, with alleged stolen bonds and
cash in his possession, escaped
early yesterday morning from the
First precinct.
He was arrested on the Speedway
when a battered and opened safe
was found in the automobile in
which he Is alleged to have been
speeding. Merica, with Henry
Patrick Sweeney, twenty-five years
old, was brought to the station
house.
Sweeney, married, with two chill
dren and living at 1911 Eighth
street northwest, confessed, police
say, that he and Merica had stolen
the safe from the automobile repair
shop Of William r. Rye. 216 G
street northwest. Sweeney was
charged with HOUSEKEEPING and
joy-riding.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-04-08
Puts Mattingly
On Police Bench

Judge Robert e. Mattingly, OF the
court, has been designated
by Chief Justice Mccoy of the Dis
trict Supreme Court to fill any
vacancy that may be caused by
temporary absence Of any of the
Police Court judges.
This means that II one Of the
Police Court judges takes a vaca-
ton or becomes disabled, the ma.
chinery Of justice will be kept
moving.
1t also means that IL Judge
Robert Hardison, of the United
States branch of the Police Court,
whose term expires April II. does
not VacZe the bench at that time
because of the failure of the Presi.
dent to appoint a successor, Judge
Mattingly will take his place until
someone IL appointed and con.
firmed.
The order assigning Judge Mat.
tingly to the police court holds good
until January /, 1924.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-04-08
G|VESPUBL|C CREDIT
FOR SAFER TRAFFIC
Police Chief Considers That
Cooperation Has Reduced
Casualty List.

The serious traffic situation
marked by many accidents which
existed in Washington several
months ago has been placed under
control In the past two months
through cooperation Of the public.
A statement issued, yesterday. by
Maj. Daniel Sullivan, superintendent
Of police, records this appreciation.
Major Sullivan urges a continued
educational campaign in order that
public opinion may be moulded to
appreciate the need Of traffic en-.
forcement. He points out that 1t is
essential that organizations, such
as the traffic committee Of the
Washington Safety Council make a
continuous study of accidents &C.
curing in the city and follow their
survey with recommendations to
eliminate such causes.
There are two predominant
causes OF traffic accidents, says
Major Sullivan. There is the reck-
less driver who does not feel any
responsibility for the lives OF
others, but simply drives his
machine to suit his own selfish
convenience; until this type OF iu-
diVtdual can be changed in his atti-
tude or removed from the streets,
accidents cannot be entirely pre-
vented. The other cause is due to
the citizen who either ignorantly
or carelessly crosses streets without
first seeing If it is safe to do SO,
in general both the motorist and
pedestrian have definite RESPONSE
bllities in the prevention of acct
dents.
I'm order to obtain the full CO.
operation Of the public, it is es-
sential that g. continuous educa-
tional campaign be conducted in
order that public opinion HAY be
nodded to more and more appre.
ciate the need of traffic law en-
forcement. The police department
feels that the posters recently dis
played on the streets have mate
rally assisted to keep the subject
OF accident prevention constantly
before the public and to thus assist
in obtaining greater public con-
seriousness.
''The schools for automobile
drivers are tending to place more
efficient and careful drivers behind
the wheels of our commercial We
hicles. The activities Of our va
rious associations and civic organi-
cations are producing results by
bringing the matter Of safety before
the members Of their respective or.
CARNATIONS.
In addition to the educational
work it is essential that organiza-
lions such as the traffic committee
OF the Washington Safety Council
make a continuous study and analy.
sis Of the accidents which have and
are occurring in the city. This
study should be followed by care.
full recommendations based on ex.
perience indicating where physical
conditions should be changed, or
existing regulations improved in
order to cope with the ever-increas-
ing conditions and to remove causes
Of preventable accidents
I'm general, the police department
bespeaks the continued co-opera-
ton Of the citizens of Washington
in it's earnest desire to assist in
the. public safety campaign"
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-04-08
HEROIC D. c. boy
WINS HIGH TRIBUTE
Lee GiIstrap Cited for "Superb
Devotion to Duty on
French Front.

One Of the most unusual citations
accorded an American soldier for
service during the world war
accompanied the award Of a Dis
tinguished Service Cross to Lee F.
Gilstrap, son Of Major and Mrs.
Harry B. Gilstrap, 1924 Massa-
chusetts avenue northeast.
Young Gilstrap enlisted at the
age of seventeen for service in the
A. E. F. Both he and his father
served during the entire conflict.
The youth is at present attending
Oklahoma A. and NJ College, Still
water. Okla, where he is president
Of the junior class.
He is also commander of the
American Legion, department of
Oklahoma, being one of the young
est State officers of the veteran
group in the country.
The citation follows:
Lee F. Gilstrap, then bugler,
Company B, land Infantry, 36th
Division. United States army For
extraordinary heroism in action
near st. Et1enne sur Marine, France,
October 8, 1918. In the assault of
the land Infantry before the town
Of st. Etienne, Bugler Gilstrap
voluntarily accompanied the first
assaulting wave of his regiment.
Under direct observation Of the
enemy he assisted many wounded
men to shelter, with utter disregard
for his own safety.
Throughout the day he volun-
tarily carried messages from bat
talon to regimental headquarters
through a zone swept by terrific
enemy machine gun, gas shell and
high explosive artillery fire. Re
peatedly urged by officers and non
commissioned officers TO seek shell
ter he cody declined to do so. con-
tinuing on his dangerous missions
in complete contempt for the hot
test fire until badly burned by gas
shell fire and evacuated to hospital.
During the course Of the day he
found several enemy soldiers mid
ing in shell holes. These men he
required to carry wounded Ameri.
can soldiers to dressing stations.
The indomitable heroism, contempt
for enemy fire and superb devotion
to duty of Bugler Gilstrap served
as an example of soldierly bravery
and conduct to every man of his
regiment and inspired them all to
the greatest endeavors.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-04-08
Herrick Plans
Aerial Thrill
For Shriners
MANUEL HERRICK. ''the

MANUEL HERRICR, '.the
AL aerial daredevil Of Con.
greas," plans to give tie
Shriners numerous thrills by
stunt flying during the Shrine
convention here in June.
The former Representative
made known his plans yester.
day to Daniel T.. Garges, sec.
Rotary to the Board Of Com
missiOners. when he came 10
the District building to learn
the procedure to secure q per.
init to fly.
When told that the War De-
partaNeElt conducts demOTlstrn-
tons 10 determine the applf.
cant'S fitness to secure q per.
NIT, Herrick declared that
everyone seems TO pass the
buck as he inquired al Boll-
iag Field and was referred to
the Commissioners.
Secretary Garges gave him
the necessary information, and
1t il likely that Herrick win
be call up IN the air. in the
near future doing numerous
stunts.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-04-08
ASKS CITY STOCK UP
FOR SHRINE VISITORS
Merchants and ManufaCtur-
ers' Association Notifies of
Restricted Freights.

A warning for local merchants,
retailers, jobbers and manufactur-
ers to lay it at once supplies of
all kinds in anticipation Of curtailed
freight and express service from
May &c to June Is, on account of
the Shrine Convention, has been
issued by the Merchants and Man
ufacturers' Association.
This notice is the result Of its
conference yesterday with represen-
tatives of railroads, express COM
panies, and steamboat lines. Dur
ing the period mentioned, it Is
anticipated, rail merchandise will
be confined almost solely to food
stuffs of a perishable nature.
A special committee of the .asso-
citation has been giving the matter
serious consideration. The commit
tee reports:
Personal business welfare de-
mands that the respective bust
nesses lay in supplies that will
carry them over the period named.
To do otherwise would jeopardize
the welfare of the city's great host
Of guests at the Shrine conclave as
Of Washington" the committee
says.
The Merchants and Manufac-
turers' Association urges upon the
public in general the Importance
of each household likewise antici-
pating its needs as far as is pos
sible.
The committee Is as follows:
Gen. Anton Stephan, chairman;
George S. DeNeale, Louis Levy,
John H. Wilkins, F. s. Hight, Carl
Corby, C.. w. Turner, w. w.
Bowie, D. NJ. Fisher, Robert Buck
ley, J. Maury Dove, ir.. John L..
Newbold and William H. Callahan.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-04-08
Steals Motor Car; Goes
To Jail 3 Hours Later

Three hours after stealing an au.
tomobile in Washington last night,
William A. North Of Los Angeles,
was on his way to the Maryland
House Of Correction at Jessup Cut,
Md, to serve two years and six
months.
The auto, property Of Charles p.
Medley, 2618 Thirteenth street
northwest, was stolen from Eight
and H streets northwest at 5
o'clock. An hour later North was
arrested by State Policeman Frank
P. Prince and taken to Rock
vile, Md.
North confessed when taken he.
fore a justice of the peace. He
was convicted Of taking stolen pron.
erty into Maryland.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-04-08

Highest, 51.2; lowest, 37.1.
Relative humidity--8 q. M, - per
cent; p. M. 81 per cent: p. M. 80
per cent.
Rainfall Is p. m. to 8 p. m.)-O.
Hours of sunshine-12.9.
Per cent of possible sunshine-100.
Temperature same date last year
Highest, So; lowest, e.
RIVER CONDITIONS.
Potomac river muddy and Shendoah
clear at Harpers Ferry last evening.
TIDE CONDITIONS.
High tide, TAI q. m. and 2:11 p. m.
Low tide, s:18 q. m. and S:66 p. m.
Sun rises 5:44 q. M; sets 6:S7 p. m.
Moon rises 40 q. M; sets 11:44 q. m.
FLYING WEATHER FORECAST.
Washington to Long Island: Low
clouds and rains: strong south and
southwest and gales up to 5000 feet Z
Washington to Norfolk: Cloudy;
showers; strong southerly winds up to
5000 feet.
Washington to Dayton: Low clouds
and rains; strong shifting winds and
gales up to 5000 feet,
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-04-08
Warn Ships of Storm
Along Atlantic Coast

The Weather Bureau last night
ordered storm warnings displayed
from the Virginia Capes to East
port, Me-, owing to a severe storm
over Lake Michigan moving rapid
ly eastward.
The storm is attended by in
creasing southerly winds which will
reach gale force by Sunday morn
ing, the bureau said.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-04-08
WIFE ALLEGES pEsERTIoN.

Mrs. Margaret e. Robinson, wife
Of William E. Robinson, auditor ir
the Bureau Of Internal Revenue,
filed suit yesterday in the District
Supreme Court for limited divorce
on the gound of alleged desertion.
Mrs. Robinson claims that her hus-
band deserted her on July 10, 1922,
and has since failed to provide for
her. The couple were married Jan.
uary 6, 1920. There are no children.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-04-08

credit the fantastic theory that "the
curse Of the Pharoahs'' had any
thing to do with the death Of the
famous author and EgyptoIogist.
II am the possessor OF q scartb
found In q tomb antedating the
dynasty OF King Tut-AnlEh-Amen by
d hundred years" said Sir Rider,
land it has not brought me any
thing but good fortune"
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-04-08
'IRISES' is LECTURE THEME.

Bertrand H. Farr, of Wyomiss-
ing, Pa, will give an illustrated
lecture on "Irlses" at meeting of
the American Horticultural Society
in New National Museum building
Tuesday. DR.. Lumsden, secretary
of the society, has requested mem
bers to bring specimens for the
exhibition table.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-04-08

T EE r. GILsTRAP, whose
~ father, Major Harry b.
Gilstrap, is liaisOn officer at
the United States Veterans
Bureau, has been awarded q
distinguished service cross for
extraordinary bravery. He
was seventeen when he en-
tered the service.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-04-08

ECRETARY HUGHES delivering address Memorial
t"entnI Hall Boy Scout cite"ep york Flags presented
fOryUO the District
of the American Revolution in recognition of their services the
Conference.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-04-08
AMI FAMILY HAT TRYH FREE

TAOysaRds Of pngenfe are askine
themsesees, Where can ! find q trust
tDprthy Ld@dtSoe aagtS anyone IL Tie
lGmsty can use wksR ccnstiputed2"
I ugge yo1 to Try Syrup Pepsin.
I Dtn gtddly prOgide q LIBERAL free
sample 6ot.Le, sufficient for an odequnte
test. Write me tohere q send u.
Address Or. W.. ID. CGldpeM, SIS
WashiHSton St. Monticello. IHinois.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-04-08
The Weather
FORECAST FOR TODAY
AM TnMnRRnW.

For the District of Columbia and
Maryland, showers today, colder in
western Maryland; tomorrow fair and
colder; strong south, shifting to west
winds.
For Virginia, showers today; much
colder by tonight; tomorrow fair and
colder; strong southerly winds.
LOCAL TEMPERATURES.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-04-08

weaken you. and their reaction
tends TO make you more consti-
pated than before. .
Now try the milder method.
DR.. CaldweIl's Syrup Pepsin does
not lose its good effect with re-
peated use, and increased doses
are unnecessary. Mrs. z. M.
Burgess Of Enfield, N. c., who is
73,, keeps herself IN good health
with it, and Mr.. Charles Chorman
of Stapleton, Staten Island, N. ".
wasted fifteen years and consid-
cradle money on other remedies
before finding steady relief with
Syrup Pepain.
Use DR.. CaldMells Syrup Pep
sin yourself the next time you
suffer from constipation, bilious
ness, headache. sleeplessness, In
digestion, piles or night cramps.
Many thousands Of elderly people
use nothing else. and it costs them
less than q cent q dose. Druggists
have sold it successfully for 80
years, and it is the most widely
bought family laxative In the
world.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-04-08

= =
health, as every
one learns upon
reaching the age
of go, is the regu-
lar daily move
ment of the bow
els. If it can be
effected through
the food you eat,
the water you
drink and the ex-
ercise you take,
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-04-08

50 much the better. But IL
nature win not operate it must
be assisted or sickness win follow.
Neglected constipation causes the
blood pressure to go up % per
cent, and that is the forerunner
of hardening of the arteries. It
makes rheumatism and govt
worse, too.
The ideal constipation remedy
for people of advancing years Is
DIR. CaldweIl's Syrup Pepsin, a
vegetable compound of Egyptian
SIENNA and pepsin with pleasant
tasting aromatics. 1t is gentle
and mild, and does not cramp or
grippe. It is a mistake to think you
need a violent salt or powder or
pill, calomel, coal-tar drugs and
such things. They purge and
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-04-08
This L0.ratiUe Works
Fine on Old People

ThSusaaas have Kept thensslvss kealthy
with D.. caIdwsll's S1Eup Pepsia
A DVAN cling age with its
n subdued ambitions and
strivings could be made very
happy If only good health accom-
panied it, and the basis of good
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-04-08

CAL TEAGPERATUREa.
, 1923-06-05
Harding Speaks
At Dedication
Of, Milestone

WASHINGTON. juno 5.-Two
modern movements. one designed to
bring about improved highways and
the other for better homes. were
commended as making for a better
America by President Harding in adj
dress at ceremonies incident to the
Shrine convention.
Speaking at the dedication of a
zero milestone" a granite monu-
ment erected on the mall to serve
as n base for measuring highway dis.
tances, the president declared the ma
ton. having developed a system of
main roads now must recognize the
obligation to modernize the more re-
mote sections of the system to the
fullest extent justified by economic
conditions"
In his second address, made at the
opening of a reproduction in Potomac
park of the boyhood home of John
Howard Payne. composer of Home
Sweet Home. The president assert
ed that I'VE are going to have such
advancement in the mechanical APP
purtenances of the home as will
represent a real emancipation for
women" he added hat with that
emancipation, women would be seen
taking a new. a larger and vastly
more significant part" in the great
activities Of life.
, 1923-06-05

wAsHINGToN-slmon Wolf, IS,