Evening star., 1923-02-11

ought to be able to see through the
American. policy. Ali Bla-Bla,s the
commander of the mirthful appoints
you unofficial observer
what do l do?"
pert opinion. This book ought to
have some reference to authority,
Yes. under unofficial observer is a
footnote which says: For further
sssan Ia sensGf saG Reed seef
Senator Reed
Senator Reed, what ought to be
done with our unofficial Observer"
IF ] told you I'd be arrested" said
Senator Reed"
Senator Reed, o master. is the
all-wise statesman who proposes
taking the West Indies in cancella-
tion of England's debt"
"Ha, hal Instead Of adding q lot
Of happy islands to dry territory. why
not give Louisiana back to France
and call everything square,"
During this conversation Ali Bla- -Bla
peered through the telescope.
safs shh It is in s1e the amsTfsan Efsa5 stssa stss
Department. A man-wlth beard
is peering into 1t. He looks at a
dusty bundle in the remotest recess
1t is labeled league of nations He
hears some one coming. He slams
the Sa1e QOOT. ne LOOKS out tne VIII
dow. He says he thinks it may rain
The question of foreign policy SEEM
ing very difficult. it was decided to send
for Alasker and his wonderful lamp. He
said the dumbded thing was bewitched; !;
they had rubbed it, wishing for ship
ping bill and had gotten bonus
why don't you ask for some real
leadership in Congress and see if you
can get second term?' said the Caliph
tartly.
81 am Bill Borah." said wise-looking
guy who entered. II heard you wanted
some advice. I can tell you anything"
I'VE are just formulating our foreign
policy" said the Caliph, and"
81 am against it, said Borah.
why. we don't know yet what it is
going to be-
THAT doesn't make any difference.
All foreign policies look alike to me-"
''Well, ! know this much will please
YOU. We have already decided to stay
out"
That's wrong. You should go in
'Why. ! thought you wanted us to
keep out?'
II did. as long as everybody else
wanted to go in. But now they want
to stay out, / favor going in. BY the
way. do you intend to have naval arma-
ment Imitation
I'VE will have to refer that to our
minister of Marine"
This is the Caliph's Minister of Ma
Are you scrapping any of our ships?"
asked the Caliph.
yes, In principle: We are only keep
ing the ships that We can fight with"
Old Man Congress-
The wonderful lamp was again
rubbed and invoked the spirit of Con-
gress. who announced solemnly. 81
am Congress. sometimes called the
Old Man Of the Sea. Nothing shall be
done without me. / declare war and
peace and determine policy between
times. l kept America out of the rep
arations commission. l restricted its
debt commission. / cancel now all
the foreign policy you have tried to
evolve. 1 am going to take my place
upon your neck.
Then we can not have any foreign
policy" walled the Caliph.
Not without me-" cried the Old Man
of the Sea as he mounted the Caliph' S
shoulders
One scene in another skit was sup
posed to be laid in Lafayette Square.
Twas midsummer and the park
benches were full. Congress had long
since adjourned, but a group of sena-
tors and representatives were en-
gagged in conversation. having just
met by chance.
We'll. senator, thought you were
going back to the old state" said one.
"W-e-U. was, but I'm kind O. won
dering. You see. l wrote out to the
state chairman of our party. Am
looking forward with intense inter
est l said, to tour of the beauty
meeting the people. What can you ad-
wise as to itinerary. ct cetera" He
replied: See Europe first"
I'm on my way" said another:
drew my mileage yesterday: leaving
tonight. One of those summer tours
~, 81 fnr n Nd nj
lars-stopping on the way at a few
Mediterranean ports. thence via China
and Japan-just about until the first
Monday in December on the way, as
1 figure it.
by the way. what's keeping you
here?"
"President asked me to stay while
he was away. Said to me: Old man.
when Congress stops is Just the time
you ought to stick to Washington. |
always feel safe with you in Wash
ington, when Congress is not in ses-
sion"
We'll" said the next one, I'm stay
ing on because I'm too darned modest
to face the reception back home. Had
the district chairman on long distance
yesterday and he told me about the
reception. i says: is there going to
be a band at the station and he says:
Reckon there be; some Of the boys
was talking it over last night, and
Dick Hawkins inquired did anybody
know the price now of a gallon OF
tar, and Bill SturgesS says, L know
where we can get all the feathere we
want for nothing"
Then to the air Of "I Am Afraid to
Go Home in the Dark" they marched
off singing:
Constituents, dear, listen here: We're
afraid to go home to you.
Vacation days confront our gaze, but
the congressman's lot is blue.
So we sit her on a bench in the park,
a dismal, sad, sad crew:
There's no place like home, but were
afraid to- go home to you
Relics From Tomb.
Announcement was made that two
of the excavators of the tomb OF the
Egyptian king, Tutankhamen had
able finds, which they proposed to
exhibit. The first was a set of hero
elyphics, being the famous jokes and
wittcisms of Cairis, the famous king
who reclaimed the Egyptians from
savagery but drove his wife Isis to
state occasions. He was asked to
read them, but upon looking over the
hall and noting the presence of a
number of famous columnists and
joke-smiths among the guests, re-
Trained because he did not wish to
embarrass them by disclosing the
source Of their inspiration"
Another tablet was a royal COM
mand that the ships Of commerce
should receive from the royal bursar
sufficient gold to enable them to COM
pete with the ships of Ninevah, Tyre
and Phoenicia.
What is on the reverse of the
tablet?" was asked.
Unfortunately, the reverse Of the
tablet is blank" was the reply.
Another statement was that a
wealthy lady had purchased the tomb
of Tutankhamen and would have
it brought to America as a permanent
home for Vice Presidents. Precau-
tion had been taken to inquire of
Vice President Coolidge and former
Nioo PraSidant Marshall x,haf hox