davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1923-05-04
OVERWHELMING TIMIDITY

Henry Ford says that the people
win have to draft him, and draft
mighty hard to get him to run for
the presidency. This reminds one of
the old time bar room soak who had
to take hold of the lapel of his own
coat and pull himself up to the bar,
reluctantly, when somebody asked
him to have drink.-Webster City
(Iowa) Freeman Journal.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1923-05-04
HE'LL TAKE ANY CHANCE

The report by the government en-
gineers to the effect that the White
House is fire trap will never dis
courage Mr.. Bryan.-Detroit Free
Press.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1923-05-04
UNANIMOUS!

Everyone who is glad that the
United States is not mixed up in the
European fracas, stand up. Yes,
that is just the way we feel about it,
too.-Knoxville (Ia) Journal.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1923-05-04
SAME OLD YAWP!

Mr.. Gompers has so fully recover
ed that he is warning the Republican
party against something or other
Minneapolis Journal.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1923-05-04

Scrub chickens, scrub cattle, scrub
hogs, and scrub seed have only one
inevitable result-scrub farmers.
Giving corn plant food by spread
ing fertilizer away from its feeding
roots is about as sensible as feed
ing horse by spreading hay
around its hind legs.
Some figures lie; others show that
there has been an increase in
paintings the country over this
spring on asparagus, lettuce, to-
matoes and Strawberries.
Gran'pa says: | don't know any
folks who would buy an automobile
without knowing about it's engine
but know lot who get seed with
out looking at the label.
Travellers in Portugal report that
in many places where timber trees
are to be found--in woods, parks
and gardens-one sees the following
inscription, headed ITO the Way
farer:"
Ye who pass by and would raise
your hand against me, hearker
ere you harm me.
/ am the heat of your hearth on the
cold winter nights, the friendly
shade screening you from thu
summer sun, and my fruits are
refreshing draughts, quenehing
your thirst as you journey on.
l am the beam that holds YOU
house, the board of your table
the bed on which you lie, ant
the timber that builds you
boat
l am the handle of your hoe, tn,
door of your homestead, tht
wood of your cradle, and the
shell of your coffin.
| am the bread of kindness and tn,
flower of beauty.
Ye who pass by, listen to my pray
err; harm me not.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1923-05-04
PETAL STRIPPED FROM SHAM
ROCK, DEATH CLAIMS THE
OTHER TWO.
Irish Women Are Asphyxiated Week
After Their Inseparable Companion
of 20 Years Succumbs; All Insisted
on Being Hired or Flied Together.

Every lrishman knows that if you
pull one petal from shamrock, even
in the spring, the little plant will die;
the other two petals will curl and
cr1umple across one another in a last
affectionate embrace. So the police
can say that Bridget Walsh, seventy
years old, and Catharine 0'Brien, sew
enty-two, were asphyxiated yesterday
in their apartment at $50 9th Avenue,
by escaping gas. And neighbors can
say they turned on the gas and lay
down to die. But those who knew the
women well and those who know
Shamrock win tell you the deaths
came because Mrs. Jennie Devereaux
died a week ago.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1923-05-04

| In their earthly woes
They grub and cav
All the live-long day,
They yearn in vain
For the PARKWAY,
| Or else are blind
To the joys that lay
| In abundance near at hand!
*****s
The American Agriculturist says,
"a beerkeg, (if you can get one,) in
the bull pen tempts the penned bull
to indulge in much-needed exercise"
And we might add: "a beerkeg (if
you can get one FULL,) tempts most
any kind of "bull' to indulge!"
s*ss*%
Not that it's "much- needed" how
everi
Mary Meeker, Brooklyn girl who
was recently awarded prize for
having the most beautiful hands, was
referred to by newspapers, "The
ivory-tinted texture and anatomical
perfection, she says, is due to help
ing mother wash the dishes"
*%&sss
But the method Of hand identifying
preferred by the average girl is that
of welding powder rag and hold
ing hands with some callow youth
whose brains rattle in his head like
pea in a pod!
The poor deluded fool who dances
for 100 hours just to get her picture
in the paper would be worn to fraz-
zle with days housework!
The difference in dance record
and photograph record is that you
can stop the latter when you are
tired of it!
| **A***
If people knock you, take heart!
Did you ever hear of anyone being
knocked who never DID anything :?
| s**s**
It's better to be called belligerent
than to be called "a poor fish,
| ss*%ss
| And man is called "a poor fish"
because that's just what he is!
Speaking of Jonah swallowing the
whale
| LEAVE SINKING COAL BARGE
IN SMALL BOAT WHICH WAVES
UPSET." means a Trenton Times
news heading.
They should have better sense than
to think "small boat" could hold a
"coal barge!"
The most appropriate way to SAY
it with flowers" nowadays is to mix
in some juniper.
ss&sss
WE SECOND THE MoTIoNl
A fastidious young housewife was
recently reported as "kneeding bread
with her gloves on" to save her lily
white hands. One of our contempor-
aries commented on it as follows:
1.-THE editor of this paper needs
bread with his shoes on, He al
SO needs it with clothes on. But
if some of the delinquent sub
scribers don't pay up pretty
soon, he will need bread with
out darn thing on!"
sss%ss
We hear lot of bunk about peo-
pile not being able to afford the ex-
pense of having children, but we
never hear anything about people
mortgaging their homes to buy baby
carriages like they do to buy autos!
Many people who claim they came
from "a fine family" have Travelled
a long, long way
If Ford makes as many miles ON
his gas in his journey toward the
presidency as his car does on the
road, he'll be going some. But look
at all the nuts he'll shake loose!
The only reason why Ford touring
ears can accommodate the five passen-
gers claimed for them is because the
owners generally have children. We
are prejudiced against limousines be-
cause so many poodle dogs ride in
the darn thingsl
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1923-05-04
FARM AND
HOME FACTS

Scrub chickens, scrub cattle, scrub
hogs, and scrub seed have only one
inevitable result-scrub farmers.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1923-05-04
= l. O(rIIsSAM, 3 SJJE=FSAMl 4,
a

The writer shamefacedly confesses
that possibly in previous issues con-
tanning this department, there was
too much of the salvager and not
enuf of the material salvaged.
In fact friendly critic mtimated
as much.
SO here then is the "Amende Hon
orable."
The "Flotsam" this week is hu-
man interest story from recent is
sue of the New York Tribune"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1923-05-04

Giving corn plant food by spread
ing fertilizer away from its feeding
roots is about as sensible as feed
ing horse by spreading hay
around its hind legs.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1923-05-04

Some figures lie; others show that
there has been an increase in
paintings the country over this
spring on asparagus, lettuce, to-
matoes and Strawberries.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1923-05-04

The only reason why Ford touring
cars can accommodate the five passen-
gers claimed for them is because the
owners generally have children. We
are prejudiced against limousines be-
cause so many poodle dogs ride in
the darn things!
New Britain herald., 1923-01-18

If you put Herald Classified Ad in the paper for six nights and after the first night you find that the ad has accomplished it's purpose. let the Herald Classified Dept. know before o'clock the following day and you will be charged for only one insertion.
New Britain herald., 1923-01-18

News is plentiful in the Herald Classified columns. Many people spend minutes a day reading ads It is a sign of thrift
New Britain herald., 1923-01-18

Graduates of Mrs. NJ C. Sullivan of Hartford-The Misses Gleed and Roe-Now Located At l22 Main St. the Mutual Bldg Read The Herald Classified Page Heading ls Bar bes Hairdressers and Masseuses" For the Service That Satisfies.
New Britain herald., 1923-01-18

HIP BOOTS, knee boots. "storm King ; boots, felt boots rubbers. raincoats. etc. al pig savings. All sizes and everyone first quality. Army & Navy Store ss Church St.
New Britain herald., 1923-01-18

FULL line of Ball Band footwear for men ana boys. Shoes hide to wear, better shoes for less money. All guaranteed. s6 Church St. Joe Mortelliti.
New Britain herald., 1923-01-18

FURN1TURE--We will buy It at fair prices. The Furniture Exchange, e Arch St. A.
 J. Grafe Mgr. ".
New Britain herald., 1923-01-18
Wanted-Articles To Buy.

FURNITURE in gooo condition wanted. Good prices pald, all household articles. Call me before you sell. Phone 515-l3.  JUEk-If you want the highest prices paid for papers. magazines, rags and other junk be sure to call l.. zeldes ana watch for the name on my truck that will assure you a fair deal. Call 5.1S. l51 Oak street.
New Britain herald., 1923-01-18

FEDERAL tires & Michelin tubes. Author- ized sales agency. Judd Dunlop. Is Franklin Square. Phone 1928.
New Britain herald., 1923-01-18
Feed and Fuel.

KEEP the egg basket full in warm weather and in cold. by feeding Purina Poultry Chows. We guarantee you more eggs or money back. Order some today. N. R. Bird & Feed Co.,, 105 Arch St.
New Britain herald., 1923-01-18
Footwear and Clothing,

ESTABLISH your credit at the Bosfon Clothing Store next door to the Herald Office. Keep well dI essed.
New Britain herald., 1923-01-18

JUNK-We buy mas papers, rags, all kinds of furniture. We pay good prices Rodinsky. S1 Oak street. Tele-
 phone lh91.
New Britain herald., 1923-01-18
Rooms For Housekeeping.
Wanted-Board Or Lodeine.

YOUNG couple desires to rent furnished house or apartment in good section of city. Box 49JG. Herald.
New Britain herald., 1923-01-18

BATTER1Es-Wet and dry winter storage. all makes. Reasonable rates. J. M. Far rell. l10 Franklin sq. Phone 1918.
New Britain herald., 1923-01-18

TWO family house of ten rooms with im- provements; l2vO It. frontage on plain- Nile troliey and highway. kobt, H. White, zoy Main St.
New Britain herald., 1923-01-18
Real Estate-Wanted.

SINGLE or , tenement house near Center. 1T tenement IL must be a IOgo invest lneht. GiNe particulars ill Iirst letter. F, U. BOX 4U4, BrIsto
New Britain herald., 1923-01-18
BOARD AND HOTELS
Rooms Tor Rent.

AhCH ST., b2S--Cor. Monroe and Arch Sts.. Iurhshed rooms to rent. Phone s5s-3 SOR. MAPLE & PARK, 17S-One furnished room, suitable for l or gentlemen: all eonreniences. Phone 2Sy2-2
New Britain herald., 1923-01-18

FUR COATS on weeksy payments. Boston
 Clothing Store, 65' Church St.. next to
 Herald Office. "
New Britain herald., 1923-01-18

WE pay fair prices for any household ar ticles. Just drop q card to D. NJ. Benja- min, 115 Beaver St. Phone 1920.
New Britain herald., 1923-01-18

Let's go! A Herald" classified ad will sell the furniture. Notice head ing 63 tonight.
New Britain herald., 1923-01-18
Auto Parts and Accessories. i

ACCESSORIES--A I0% cash discount on all automobile parts supplies and access sories. except tires. tubes and gas. This stock includes Ford parts, ignition parts. greases. rings and brake iinins Ours 10 the largest stock of automobile parts and accessories in the city. Rack. life Bros. Park q Bigelow sts. Tel. 1074. AUTO parts for all makes. Axels, bearinRs. our speciality. Standard Auto Repair, 22 Oak St. Tel 5l5-4.
New Britain herald., 1923-01-18

GMMoNS PLACE-z family house l4 rooms everything modern ana right in the cen ter oL the city. Ihis IS me place to Keep roomers. Price Sll,500. Watson ana Jones, 2s4 Main St. Phone 2450.
New Britain herald., 1923-01-18

NICELY furnished room with ali conyen- fences in west Main St. section for I or renned gentlemen. Phone 2o74
New Britain herald., 1923-01-18

THREE family house, years old, , fur haces and all modern improvements. Price only sl0,0Ou This is the one chance in a thousand you read about. See us Tor details. nome Banking & Realty, S6 West Main St. Phone .2S.
New Britain herald., 1923-01-18

sfubkBAkERs-fAsh siz touring, ssTsi spselsi slk touring. ti,i7si his six touring
 ti.Ieei Y, a, B, faeteTY, M, Irving Jester, iss Arch st, ''fhis is studehaksr year.
New Britain herald., 1923-01-18

P0TATOES-Wanted to buy, 25 bushels
 small potatoes. 142 Main St
New Britain herald., 1923-01-18

WELL FELLOWS, here's another! The In-
 dian and Hkriey have been sold. Now for another bargain! A 1920 Harley Davidson,
 just thoroughly overhauled and equipped
 with corbin- Brown speedometer and a
 new rear tire. Price only Sl50. Como in and take a look. Small deposit will hold 1t until spring. Monier Bros, 3S.S2 Main St. "The Sporting Goods Store."
New Britain herald., 1923-01-18

EAST ST. family house of 10 room. electricity and hardwood noors and fin ish. Low price. Star Real Estate a. Insnr- ance Co.,, l6s Main St.
New Britain herald., 1923-01-18

-hINlIi ST, S-2 rooms, in private fam- ny. Will give board. References required Tel. 1UZ5-Z. "bSr MAIN ST. 154-Furnished room. suitable Tor two teachers. Board if de- sired.
New Britain herald., 1923-01-18
Building and Contract.

CARPENTER jobbing. shingling. M. O. Heisier. Telephone l4s2-4 between 12 and 1 and after n
New Britain herald., 1923-01-18
BUSINESS SERVICE
. Barbers. Hairdressers, Masseuse

e Barbers. Hairdressers, Masseuse 1S HAIRCUTTING--Mothe we have tive hobby-horse chairs to amuse kiddies while having their hair trimmed. Hours
 a. m. to p. m.s.32 Church. Opp. Beloin. LA FRANCE BEAUTY PARLOR-Misses c. NJ. Rock and kath. Gleed, Props. Grads. of Mrs. NJ. c. Sullivan. 122 Main. Tel. 572. MAGNETIC Masseuse. both body and fac0. skillful Vaporic treatment for Rheurc .. tisni. Neuralgia Magnetic vibration ., the spinal vertebrae for tiredness ana sleeplessness; treatments by visit or tt A her home. Mrs. Sadie Reeve, 16s Main St. Phone 2S87.
New Britain herald., 1923-01-18
LIVE STOCK

Dogs, Cats, Pets. 5i REGISTERED German police dog. female two years old; one German bodice male pup; one female Boston bull. five months old. Call 74s West Main St. THoRouGHBRED Boston terrier pups. ss Whiting street.
New Britain herald., 1923-01-18

AARAEN0 anu BeneTaI maDDn and plaster work. Work guaranteed. J. J. McI,arney. 131 Clark St. Phone 17<4-23. ELECTRICAL WORK wiring and fixtures, send card to A. Tyler, Newngton.
New Britain herald., 1923-01-18

LAST MAIN ST., 20S--rurnished room for gentleman. steam heat. central. Tele- phone 1885.
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1923-10-12
WOMEN LAUNCH
CIVIC PROGRAM
Forward Club Members
Advocate Several
New Projects

Caldwell women embarked on a
comprehensive civic improvement pro-
gram Tuesday when members OF the
Forward club devoted the business
portion OF the regular monthly club
melting 10 a consideration OF various
proposals for civic improvements.
Among other things touched upon
were a swimming pool at Memorial
park. fence around Curtis park and
its improvement and consideration OF
the city tourists park problem
Stress was laid upon the swimming
pool. Mrs. J. 4. Young. speaking on
the subject, said that she understood
a movement had been inaugurated TO
improve Caldwell's Atlantic City"
on the river next year. She ielt tina,
money might be expended there
should be used in the construction OF
a swimming pool at Memorial park.
supplementing the wading pool al
ready there. She pointed out the ne
cessiiy for a safe place for children
and young people to enjoy this sum
mer sport and spoke OF the advisi-
bility of each child learning to swim.
Cooperation of other civic organi-
cations will be sought in carrying out
the clubs civic program. Mrs. II. ID.
Blatchely sounded note of warning
when she declared that business men
generally were too frequently over
pressed and felt that times were hardly
auspicious for too ambitious a pro-
gram.
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1923-10-12
HAS GOOD TEAM

Frank Hartkopf, for several sea-
sons pilot OF the College OF Idaho
second football team, has apparently
developed a neat eleven at Jerome
this season, his first at coaching. Last
Friday his high school eleven took
Buhl into camp by 30-l0 score and
the squad was never compelled to ex-
tend itself. Mr.. Hartkopf believes
his team will make good record
this year. according to letters received
here by friends.
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1923-10-12
Overnight Becomes Pro-
tector of Family; helps
Merchant when Chisis
is Reached

Did you ever see a nice picture oi
a cat and 4 dog in friendly position
with affection for each other written
all over each Of them9
But did you ever see cat. the
mother OF one or more little kittens
who had anything but intense hatred
and supicion for every dog in the uni
verse1
AT local grocery store is a mother
cat whose habit it formerly was to
tolerate every dog that came IN ana
to make friends with the friendly dogs
But that CT, has changed her mind
about the trust which might be placed
IN any canine when she became a
mother.
Dogs are particularly welcome
about grocery stores. No merchant
likes to tell the uatron who brings
her Pekinesc poodle into the store
that her friend isn't welcome but the
fact remains. This one grocer be-
lieves he has solved the problem. And
ihe solution is . mother cat with
young kitten.
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1923-10-12
Dusk Duck Hunting
Quite Expensive
Five Arrested Tuesday
Eevening; Two Draw
Heavy Fines

One duck cost Canyon county
hunter S25 fine, So costs and shot
gun. aggregating about $40. just be-
cause he happened to kill the water
fowl after sundown, contrary to law
Wednesday morning no less than
five Caldwell shooters were hailed into
United States Commissioner ID. ID.
Harger's Office upon complaint of Gil
bert Mccormick, deputy game warden.
Each was charged with shooting after
sundown. OF the FIVE W. N. Brooks
and F. G. Waldrat plead guilty and
paid fines and costs of S2S each, E. f.
Brooks entered a plea of not guilty.
1t is said he probably will not be
tried on the charge because the belief
is held he did no shooting. Two
minors, Clyde Fowler and Fred Leve-
sy, were turned over to the probate
court and Judge c. A. Williams pa
rolled them.
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1923-10-12
Burlington Wreck
Victim is Buried
Funeral Tuesday of John
Jensen; Buried in
Canyon Hill

Funeral services for John p. Jensen,
for several years a resident OF Cald-
well. were held at the First Methodist
Church Tuesday afternoon at 2:5O o.
clock. with the Rev ]. f. Baker Off
ciating. Mr.. Jensen was one of the
victims of the recent Burlington train
wreck near Casper. Wyoming
A quartette composed of Mesdames
Allan Lyon and Henry Gray and
Messrs. Edgar and r. w. OakeS, Jr
sang ASLEEP in Jesus" 20 Thou in
Whose Presence My Soul Takes De
light" and Art Thou Weary" DR.
X. G. Young presided at the organ.
The pallbearers were members Of
the carpenters union of Boise and
Caldwell friends.
Rev. Baker spoke words OF comfort
to the bereaved relatives of the dece-
dent, reminding them of the promises
of Christ and his apostles for eternal
life.
Mr.. Jensen was born in Denmark
July 20, 1871. and was baptized in the
Lutheran church Coming to America
with his parents when boy. he was
well known in southern Idaho. eastern
Oregon. and northern Utah. He leaves
to mourn his tragic passing one daugh-
ter. Mrs. Thomas Cotter, son-in-law.
two small grandchildren, of Casper.
Wyoming. six sisters, two brothers.
and numerous friends The body was
laid to rest in Canyon Hill cemetery.
beside the bodies OF Mr.. Jensen's par
ents.
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1923-10-12
Yankees Finally
Win From Giants
Take Second Game of
Series by 40 5
Score

New York Yankees turned the
tables Thursday on John McGraw' :
Giants and took the second OF the
world series baseball games By -
score. Thursday night saw the two
teams tied. each club having taken one
game. If necessary seven games will
be played.
Returns locally were received at the
Elks club where members eniovine
the service contributed small amounts
to defray the telegraphic expense.
Sentiment locally seems to favor the
Yanks to fiEally take the series but
that opinion seems rather to be based
on the belief that the law of averages
should this year return them winners
over the McGraw outfit.
Thursdays game was won in the
fourth inning when the Yankees scor-
ed two runs, aided by a home run
clout from Babe Ruih's bat. Reports
received here indicate that Ruth
scored another home run in the next
lining but this is considered doubtful
by followers of the play
The score Thursday:
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1923-10-12
HUNTERS DINE AND DANCE

Oregon geese paved the way Tor a
pleasant dinner dance given at Shep-
perds Wednesday evening when Mr..
and Mrs. A. |. Myers, DR. and Mrs.
+. NJ. Cole, Mr.. and Mrs. Earl Wheel
er. Mr.. and Mrs. J. ]. Rae, Mr.. and
Mrs. Jack Thorne and c. J. Westcott
entertained. Each of the successful
hunters invited two guests. Covers
were laid for twenty four. Autumn
flowers were used for decorations.
Guests included Mr.. and Mrs. Grant
Ward, DIR. and Mrs. L. ID. Blondell,
Mr.. and Mrs. Curtis Hayden, Mr.. and
Mrs. Alden Hyde, Misses Sadie and
lola Westcott and George Lutz.
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1923-10-12
CALDWELL HAS
GREAT RECORD
ON FIRE WORK
Speaker Lauds City For
Care; Declares Most
Fires Follow Careless
ness.

That Caldwell may be proud OF its
FIRE record but that constant care was
necessary TO maintain that record were
high lights OF an address made Thurs
day by J. II. Branscomb OF Boise be-
fore the local Kiwanis club. Thurs
day was ladies day" and about 90
women were present TO hear his pre-
sentation OF ordinary precautions
which will reduce the fire hazard in
Caldwell homes and business houses.
Individuals are responsible for de-
structive fires. Mr. Branscomb point
ed out. Seventy-hve per cent OF fires
larly. seem to be blinded to the ne
cessity of care, not only during FIRE
prevention week" but throughout the
year Fire losses in the United States
increased l20 per cent from 1912 to
1922 In the latter year they reached
SAYS per capita. Fifteen thousand
lives were lost in fires last year. he
said. and many thousand more were
seriously burned Seventy FIVE per
cent OF those lives might have been
saved with proper precautions.
knowledge that insurance oompan-
les will pay losses does not excuse
negligence, the speaker pointed out.
Burkc's recent disastrous fire took
half the premiums which insurance
companies collected in Idaho this year.
And those losses, he said, help TO de-
icrmine the fire insurance rates. These
rates vary. he said. from seventy cents
to Sl2 per hundred dollars.
Various home utensils, essential to
modern living comfort, are hidden
sources OF loss and danger il improper
~ used, he said. Among the things
that must be watched. Mr.. Branscomb
declared. are electric irons, curling
irons and the match.
Whether it is because Caldwell wo-
men are careful or whether the city
is just lucky. Caldwell is singularly
free from residence fires, II. C. Gillette,
local fire chief said in the course OF
a few remarks Cooperation from wo-
men at home and business men down
town is necessary if this city is to
continue to keep fire losses at low
figure, he said. Better put in a call
for the department than take a chance
with the smallest blaze. is his advice.