Gunnison news-champion. [volume] (Gunnison, Colo.) 1905-1932, 1923-07-27
Smith, Jones
and Mabel
By MORRIS SCHULTZ

~ In the scale. Smith was In the
war Office and Jones had something
10 do with lhe Philippines.
Nos for sSae unfortunate over.
sight what hApI-en.-i was ibis: Smiths
department xaz contgcting a neat liz.
tie warfare Asslns; a bandI; tribe in
the mountains. ignorant Of the facf
that Jones' department was subs.d,x.
Ing the ssme tribe for being good boy.
and not Interfering with their neigh
oOrs-
In other words, while Smith vas
backing Bandit BorriOboola- Cha with
arms and ammunition. TO keep Bandit
WHnka- Bousbo IN order. Jones vas
backing Wanka -BOngbo 70 sit on Bog
rioboola-Gha ard keep the lid down
They discovered It quite By accident
one nigh, when talking over things
al their boarding house on Avenue W
1, was no ordinary boarding house.
II was the best boarding house In the
world. because Mabel White lived
there. Mabel was only typls;, but
such a kind girl Everybody loved
her. Smith loved her 20 desperation.
and Jones loved her to distraction.
There wrs also a vulgar fellow. n
mere manufacturer. living there be
cause he was widowes: but. as he
was rfty. IL was evident that Mabel't
interest in him was purely sympathy.
what are We going TO do about tT
asked smith
"oh. DO tell mel" said Mabel. who
was Interested IN things.
-why, there's an Internal trouble
started" said Smith. This idiot ha.
been supplying arms and ammunition
TO WaHka E0ngbo 10 raid his peaceful
lnw-Hblding nslghbor, Borrioboola
Cha"
Nothing Of the sort :" shouted Jones
Indignantly That lunatic has been
supplying arms and ammunition 10
that caunltnl. BorrIohoola Cha 10 raid
the territories Of our ally. wanka
B1uEto'"
But how perfectly thrlliIng,- er.
claimed Mabel. "Do tell me who yor
think will winT
"B0rriobooln. Cha. OF course said
Smith hsushtily.
"wankn RDuEbo, without doubt
said Jones with icy Indifference.
Then you two boys are really al
war with each other" said Mabel soft
ly; and her glance was so full OF
meaning that each OF them realized
Instantly that the winner In the tribal
feud was the winner Of Mabels heart
From that time on Smith and Jones
regarded each other as deadly enc
mics They pored over each item o.
news from the Philippines that
reached their respective departments
OF course the government realized the
mistake II had made. but there was
nothing to be done about Il now.
Smiths heart ieaped up one dny
when lac was able to tell Mabel, in
Jones presence. that Borrioboo!a.
Gha's outposts had brought ia two
heads Of Wanka. Bongbo's men.
That night Mabel looked unmlstak
ably like Smiths. but the very next
afternoon news arrived that WanEa
Bongbos men had eaten three OF Bor
rioboola -Gha's: and the look that Ma
bel cast at Jones when she heard the
glad tIdings. drove Smith TO .despers
ton.
For weeks, II was touch and 90
Now Borrioboola- Gha's men woulc
capture two calves and dozen egs
from wanka -Bongbos village. and
Smith would take Mabel to the movies !.
then wanka- Bongbo's men would bring
back the noses and a couple Of eye
brows from Borrtoboola- Gha's villages.
and Jones and Mabel would eat ice
cream on the stoop together. while
Smith CRASHED his teeth In his bed
room.
All the boarding house knew Of the
feud and scanned the papers with alb
sorbing interest TO learn the latest
news from the Philippines. The only
exception was the manufacturer, who
cas-, sour. dour g!owers at everybody
from his motor car.
II WIS a 12-cylinder roadster with
silver fittings Mabel adored automo
billing.
The evening came when Smith and
Jones met at the boarding house and
ceased TO frown al each other. Ter
ribie things had happened.
ITO think that traitor Borrtoboola.
Cha should have Joined your cannlbal
and turned his arms on the whites ="
sighed Smith. Il wonder where
Mabel Is"
II can't understand that scoundrel
wanka- Bongbo's Joining your degraded