Evening star., 1923-06-22
CAPITAL KEYNOTES
BY PAUL Y. COLLINS

Catch him. Stop that rubber
neck! He is accused Of robbery! He
is alleged to be stealing the fair name
Of thousands of estimable Washing
tonians. He glories in his wit. Halt.
or I'll fre-or rather his boss will
fire him.
Look to the left, as we pass the
thousands of loafers. They begin
loafing at o'clock in the morning
except when they have been out late
the night before. They quit loafing
at $3.50 in the afternoon. That makes
them tired, so they have months
vacation and a months sick leave.
They are paid twice what they earn,
and 1t all comes out Of your taxes.
Now face the other way. We are
now passing the Department of -.
1t contains more loafers than the
other"
Who steals my purse steals trash.
But But he vino .obs me Of my good I'd, name
Takes that which not enriches him.
But makes me poor indeed.
Undoubtedly. the slanderous ha-
rangue of the rubberneck wit is not
spoken in malice, but that it may
raise a laugh. But such wit is not
humor. Humor is always kind and
sympathetic. 1t never carries a sting.
1t sees the pleasant contrasts. the
happy, unexpected turn OF droilery-
Jn1 ~
it: wit is negative, analytical. de-
structive; humor is creative" If rub
bernecks" study humor-not sarcas-
tic "wit'-they will win more boosters.
Reference has been made in this
column to the economical and ap-
petizing menus prepared by the Quar-
termaster Corps for the training
camps this summer. The writer is
indebted to Maj. r. L. Foster Of
subsistence branch. Quartermaster
Corps, for details of the official menu,
supplied to mess officers for their
guidance in providing a balanced ra-
ton. giving to each soldier 1900
calories day. This is much heavier
or richer diet than the office man and
For home folks, the diet could be
cut down probably 80 per cent in
calories. though II does not follow
that that would proportionately re-
duce the cost, for il would mean.
largely. the substitution OF more
vegetables and fruit and less meat.
y X X
AS sample of the ration provided
I quote the Sunday menu-the richest
of the week-and also the Wednesday
menu, the cheapest. On Sunday, the
cost, based on 100 men, exceeds the
under the average.
Sunday: Breakfast-Cantaloupes or
berries, corn flakes or oatmeal, fried
bacon and scrambled eggs, coffee.
Sugar and milk for fruit, cereals and
coffee. Cost. s17.95.
Dinner-Fresh vegetable soup.
chicken a la creole. fresh string
onions. sliced cucumbers, bread, Jelly
roll, lemonade. Cost, s26.25.
Supper (cold)-Potato salad, sliced
summer sausage, green apple sauce.
bread and butter, iced tea and fresh
whole milk. Cost, $7.15. Total cost
of ration, S52.15.
Wednesday: Breakfast-Bananas or
fresh berries. cream of wheat and oat-
meal, beefsteak and onions, toasted
bread coffee Sugar and milk for
fruit, cereal and coffee. Cost. s10.S5.
Dinner Fresh vegetable soup.
baked salt pork and beans, sphagetti
Utalian style). sliced tomatoes and
onions, fresh apple dumplings, lemon
sauce, bread. Cost. $10s0.
Supper-Mutton stew, hot biscuits,
baked potatoes. butter. apple sauce,
iced tea and fresh whole milk. Cost,
Sl5.05. Total cost of ration, s3610.
X X X X
1t will be noted that the Sunday
ration overran by s7.15 the average