davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-07-06

Discovery that a good deal of the booze being distributed by bootleggers is effective in killing cockroaches may cause some former purchasers to ac- quire more respect for their stomachs.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-07-06

A comparative absence of blistering oratory permitted the American peo- pie to give more patriotic thought to the significance of Independence Day this year.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-07-06

An Oklahoma City judge decided that girls can wear mems clothing if they wish to. Women's fashions seem to be matters of feminine tastes and fads rather than of court jurisdiction.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-07-06

In view of incidents attendant on some of the efforts to form a new po- litical party, perhaps suitable name would be, the Knock k-Down-and- Drag Out" party.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-07-06
No Cause for Excitement

In Russia, where trains even from big cities run only a few times a day, missing a train some times puts one to a lot of incon- venience.
 A certain merchant who was to make an important trip came to the depot a minute after the train had pulled out. He was clearly distressed and began to give loud expression to his harassed mind. "I am ruined!" he walled, wiring ing his hands. Tt will cost me thousands of rubles."
 By how much did you miss the train?" asked moujik, who stood nearby.
 By just a minute" replied the merchant dismally.
 And I thought said the rustic with a shrug of his shoulders, and l thought by the noise you made that you missed 1t at least by an hour"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-07-06
JEWISH LAUGHS By Jacob RichE n
to Shave His Beard

An emperor had a minister who was noted for his long beard. The minister was very proud of it and boasted on every occasion that his was the longest beard in the king dom.
 | Once, returnig from a long jour ney, the emperor said to his con- ceited courier: q you think that yours is the longest beard in the land you are laboring under an entirely wrong impression. In a small town I saw a Jew whose whiskers beats yours to a fraz gle"
 And I'll bet you any amount that mine is longer!" exclaimed the dignitary, enraged at the ruler, who, he thought, was be- grudging his distinction.
 T accept your challenge" said the monarch in a firm tone
 And how much will it be?" asked the jealous holder of the longest beard title
 "A million" snapped the opu- lent sovereign
 Good" assented the regal ad- wiser
 The emperor forthwith dis patched a high army officer with detachment of valiant soldiers to the town where the bewhiskered Israelite dwelt, with instructions to bring him before his majesty dead or alive
 There were no railroads in those days and his majesty's commits ci hod n oI ri horseback In a few weeks they arrived there and made inquiries concerning the long g-bearded Jew We know him." said the towns folk, "he lives right there and his name Is Avrohom der Melamed."
 The bewhiskered fellow was ap- prehended put in iron chains and to the wailings and protests of his family, was carried off to a des- tination unknown to him. When the prisoner was brought to the capital city the kings mes sengers took him to a bath, and not knowing what the monarch's s purpose was, they cut his hair shaved his beard and washed his body so as to make a nice ap- pearance.
 When the pale and haggard captive was presented before the ruler the latter became furious.
 "Who shaved his beard?" roared the monarch menacingly.
 we did" admitted the kings servants tremblingly.
 You are traitors!" illuminated the sovereign, delirious with rage You are condemned to death.'
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-07-06

The president reminded those who desire to live in this country without being Americans that steamship sail ings to all parts of the world are ire quent and regular.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-07-06
Against Consolidation
Livingston Homel

NbIN HIS SlUH f1UlneI
 To sacrifice the present normal school buildings to uselessness and bond the state for one or two million dollars to build one cen tral normal school is some hing no good legislator will favor, for he knows such a wild project could not be put through under any cir cumstances. Furthermore, one central school would never be so well patronized as are the five schools conveniently scattered over the different sections of the state.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-07-06

It appears that preliminary maneu- vers to organize a third party con sisted largely of fights over who should have the privilege of running it into the ground.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-07-06
How Can It Be Donef

(Talladega Daily Home)
 Another of the panaceas sug- gested by President Harding Is to live cheap and cut down the ex- penses. This is fine. and always timely, and still if the consumer is to pay income taxes and forty per cent. tariffs, how in the world is any family to live cheap?
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-07-06
In the Hay Fields of Chicago

(From the Hollandale, Wis, Review)
 We got letter from Peter Round haug of Chicago Tuesday with sub scription enclosed. Thanks. He in- forms us that it is hot and dry where he is, and he has finished having. He sends greetings to all his friends back here.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-07-06

It would be great blessing to this country if half of the energy ex- pended in law enactment were devoted to law enforcement.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-07-06

While many Russians are subsist- ing on horse flesh, they don't seem to have acquired any of the sense for which that animal has a reputation.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-07-06

So far the Germans hold the worlds record for issuing proclamations, propaganda, protests and proposals without getting anywhere.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-07-06

The ring fight and the battle of explosives having been pulled off with no increase in casualties, the Ameri-
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-07-06

Trading with Russia might not be so bad if there were any hopes of solving the collections problem.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-07-06

not in the future help the agri- cultural interests of the state.
 c. T. McELDERRY. Talladega, Ala.,N July 8. 1923.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-07-06
THE ALABAMA PRESS
A Word of OptOmism
(PrattNille Progressl

The Progress believes there Is a bright future just ahead for Au- tauga county May every citizen feel that he has a responsibility in making that future just what 1t should be.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-07-06
1IkaSSel=a=ORCH @ BEARER.

They have been grade crossings long enough. It's time to graduate lem from the grades.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-07-06
She Doesn't

She Doesn't My parents told me not to smoke.
 l don't Nor listen to naughty joke.
 l don't. They told me it was wrong to wink At handsome men, or even think About intoxicating drink.
 l don't. To dance and flirt is very wrong.
 l don't. Wild girls chase men and wine and song.
 l don't. l kiss no man, not even one; In fact, l don't know how it's done. You wouldn't think I have much fun.
 l don't.
 -Pearl DiayoOpd
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-07-06

1 can people may now tackle the job of earning enough money for their vacations.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-07-06

replacing with a more humane plan what is rapidly becoming as sociated in the popular mind with a state reproach. Both county and state prisoners are now subject to the leasing system, so that the measures must be sweeping. There are other states of the south in which the penology of humanity can find an inviting field.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-07-06
10 FAVORITE BOOKS
GAS chosen by H. I. Phillips. News-
paper cOlumnist

paper cOluuhisO Two Years Before the Mast (Dana).
 David Copperfield (Dickens). Penrod (Tarkington). The Light That Failed (Kip- ling).
 Where the Blue Begins (Chris- topher Morley).
 General Grants Owns Memoirs. o. Henry.
 The Congressional Record. McGuffey's First Reader. How to Care for the Battery in the Winter Months. Copyright. 1928. in United States and Great Britain for The Age-Herald by the North American Newspaper Alliance All rights resirved.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-07-06
l don't.

Not only is there an open season for husbands-there is a bounty on them.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-07-06

Every dog has his day. If these are dog days the dog is welcome to them.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-07-06

Not only is there an open season for husbands-there is a bounty on them.
 Royalty" says a member of par liament, 'is just ordinary common clay like anybody else. They eat like you and talk like you do-only a lit tie worse occasionally"
 George Harvey is mortified.
 Love is strange emotion which inn pels sterling citizen to write a mis- sive in impassioned verse and sign it "Sea Lion" Aside from the walrus and the hippopotamus it is hard to imagine a creature more romantic than the sea lion.
 There is much talk of the Ford boom, but any one with half an ear for music can distinguish between a boom and rattle.
 There is vacant niche in the Hall of Fame. It is waiting for the man who can retain his dignity while shaving in Pullman car.
 Baby, Seven Months Old, Operated on for Appendicitis. And the poor kid is too young to talk about it Energy All year he faltered, weak and wan, And shirked his occupation, But now his weariness is gone He throbs with animation. He is a whizz when he is on
 His annual vacation. --Ja )n.
 A federal indictment
 Caused lot of wild excitement
 In the simple days of yore,
 But it doesn't any more
 Every dog has his day. If these are dog days the dog is welcome to
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-07-06
THE AGE-HERALD

Entered at the Birmingham, Ala. postohlce ss Second-elass matter under act ol SohsFess' March S. 1879.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-07-06

A federal indictment Caused lot of wild excitement In the simple days of yore, But it doesn't any more,
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1923-05-30
LETTER FROM JOHN ALDEN
PRESCOTT TO HIS FRIEND.
SYDNEY CARTON

DEAR sgd: ~. ....
am pounding out this letter. to
you on the Old machil.a we both
abused in college when we had great
IDEAS of besting the business game
in month or two after leaving the
more or less secluded campus for
the wild, wild world. -
"Them was the happy days
l sometimes think, .Sydi that the
irresponsibility and freedom from
care that most college men have pre-
parcs them for anything else, but the
humdrum life and responsibility OF
a real business man.
And then if Il nan adds to 4 grow
ing business currirudm a wife the
dickens is to pay.
Don't misunderstood me, Sgd
Leslie is the sweete.t, dearest, love
fliest girl in all the world and ] AN
| still, yet and always in love witt
her. But when you and had spent
our last cent in the Old days we
managed to go without for "a hours
by getting invited somewhere o,
holding up n friend until we hcart
from home. If il was not forthcom
ing then. we hied ourselves to oul
uncle whose family crest is the three
gold balls, and borrowed of him
leaving as 4 token of good will oul
best dinner. suit if necessary.
When man is married that sor
| of thing can't be done. A man mar
ries both responsibility and conven
tionalitv when he marries a wife.
| begin about the fifteenth Of Thu
month to shudder when ! think o
the first of the next month with it.
bills. Sgd, !. didn't know it cost 81
much for two people to live. AM
you can't shunt them off by tcllin
them you will pay them somewher
in the middle Of next week or mex
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1923-05-30
An Open Letter

Douglas, N. y.
To the Grain Men of North Dakota,
GENTLEMEN: .'
want each and every one of you
to write Gov. Nestos demanding. that
Delegation of one or two from
each county i'm the state be sent to
Washington to demand REIMBURSEMENT
of Federal Grades.
That this Delegation be composed
ness and some attorney or Doctor,
Politician of Book Learned Theorist
of the Agricultural College like we
he'd in Washington year ago who
came back and told US all was ad-
justed satisfactorily.
What was adjusted?
You as a grain man know that the
biggest tribute is taken from the
farmer by Federal Grades of any
one process in the handling OF the
Farmers Product and handed to the
Big Milling Interests.
You know that the Milling In
terests get every point OF doubt in
the grading and docking OF grain
You know why Mr.. f. =. Wells OF
the RussellMiller Milling Co., rush
led to Washington to protest against
! 3eaG justment year ago.
/ NJ the Banks or the merchants OF
/ Notxh Dakota were being discrimin'
ated against as the Producer OF
| Wheat.is, delegates would have beer
| sent toSWashington by the hundred:
, long agOs
Yet we as grain men have set b!
and taken this loss and handed t.
tine Milling\ Interests without pro
test-why?
Because you have been dubbed a
only, a grain buyer and it has beef
figured that any fool could blu.
grain. This has been proven falls
in the last few years.
Wake up Mr.. Grain man you ar
handling the largest business i
North Dakota; you are called t
handle the wealth Of this state be
fore the Banker and Merchant, tn
Doctor or any one else can touch
to convert it into cash.
Twill admit we have hundreds i
our profession who should be dig
ing sewers, so have the banker an
others. Let US stand up for tn
right of our business as one OF tn
biggest businesses Of the state.
The Grain man who does not NAV
at heart the interest of his custom
err as we'll as himself or company
not worth his salt and is failure
IL Resp. yours
0. M. Heath.
(Other papers please copyD
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1923-05-30
Oldest Union General Sees Battles of Long Ago

By NEA Service.
Grand Rapids, Mich, May 30.--The
life Of nation is at stake
Blue and gray armies are in bat
Petersburg passes into rebel hands
again. More fierce fighting, and the
Stars and Stripes again wave proud
ly DER the field as the smoke of bat
tie clears away -
Comes word from General Han
cock Of promotion to brigadier gen
eral--an acknowledgment of gal
lantry in action. And the answer:
you had better do it quick
There's no telling how long I'll last
with the Johnnies as good shots as
they are--
General Byron X. Pierce, Oldest
surviving Union general, putting
contentedly on his after-dinner cigar,
lives again through all the fury of
the battle hell"
Lives Past Again.
| Through wisps Of smoke, he sees
the glorious charge. Then the more
sorrowful- yet more glorious things
wounded men suffering gladly for
| their cause. And dead men dotting
the trampled battletields.
Tears for his fallen comrades come
yelling up in the Old generals eyes.
! Most a the boys are gone. But he
! lives on to see another Decoration
Day.
General Pierce, now SO. is spending
his last days at Reeds Lake SAM
tarium, near here. He was born
Sept. 90, 1929, in East Bloomfield,
! Ontario County, N. y.
Entering the Third Michigan In
fantry, at the outbreak Of the war,
as captain of Company X, he rose
ly leaps and bounds. When he was
mustered out, he was n brevet major
general.
General Pierce was n fighter OF
first caliber. In different engage
ments he was wounded in both legs
ana both arms. At Fair Oaks his
horse was shot from under him.
Became Dentist.
In his youth, General Pierce was
employed in his fathers wooier
mills. Then he became a dentist.
After the war, ne entered the cloth
ing business with brother in Crane
Rapids. From 1887 to 1891 he wa:
commandment of the Michigan Sol
diers' Home.
Twice he was department com
mander Of the Michigan Grand Arm!
of the Republic. For many year
he was an officer of the Loyal LIE
gion. His wife died nearly six year
ago.
A brother, Frederick, died in tn
service during the war. Anothe
brother, Captain Edwin s. Pierce
was wounded twice. A third brother
Lieutenant Silas X. Pierce, was i
the cavalry. Major H. c. Grant,
brother-in-law, was army paymaste
general.
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1923-05-30

month or next year because you
have got to keep on buying grocer
les; you have got to keep on paying
rent; the gas man, the telephone, the
water and the electric light people
will shut off your supplies if you
cont pay them.
It's a flight, sgd.
Again don't think | blame Leslie.
She has been a brick anI know
she has worked harder than she
ever did in her life.' Besides, it
must come very hard for her.
She is doing her own work, you
know, and | don't believe she ever
washed dish in her life until she
moved into the apartment. You
just ought to see how spick and
span SHE keeps it.
When the bills come in, however
and don't know how l am. going
to pay them, ] am just as irritable
and cross lis | can be. Everything
looks hate full to- me for i can only
see the money it, costs.
got into innocent little poker
game and when it was time for me
to go home to dinner was six hun
dred dollars in the hole. l would
have thought nothing Of that in the
old days but I'm married now.
telephoned Leslie that bushes:
was keeping me down town and
told the truth, Sgd, for ] did want tt
win some of my money back. In
staed, when it came 10 o'clock ant
| had to leave because l knew Leslie
was worrying, ] found that / owee
eight hundred and fifty dollars.
OF course you know, before yo'
had gotten this far, what / am writ
ing this letter for. Havetyou go
any money. sgd? If you have viii
you lend it to me? I've got to MAKE
a payment on some stock in the con
Germ if ] would hold it. Come acros
old chap, if you can. | am in des
perate straits. , JACK.
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1923-05-30
MIR. MAN

The word "CEnaman' suggests a very definite picture
to youyelow skim slant expressoness poker face
going pacidty The picture to you because it's
composite of the Chinese you have
You with equal picture the typical Japanese
Other less clearly Americans? We haven't de-
veoped typical American. He'll come later when our
country ages and the melting pot finishes it's work.
Sometimes you marvel that there can be many mil
lions of people EARTH each different from all the others
excepting doubles. Yet after ALL very much alike
in at least nine-enths of makeup
This similarity makes DO most of the things of life in
much the same others. Physical actions, think
ing also ID . t., I
Humanity Whole-Qr least the people of cou,l-
geographical district much alike that they
:act collectively like gigantic individual.
nation at acts about the the average indi
yidual conducts himself in rage.
Anayze for instance the American people, and you
picture them CONCEALED together into great giant Through
this giant (naton) runs waves of emotion religious
yivas dancin epdemcs, etc. At times the giant Ian
kud Again he has squirt of energy Today he NAV mani
tomorrow off emotional debauch brain drowsy You
lean remember periods when the whole nation gloomy
also periods of lght-hearted JOY
II Europe, by the way, has been acting like
ering from delirium tremens. Weak, shaky irritable
Psychologists recognize two distinct kinds of mnd-the
mind of the individual and the social mind that seems
be possessed in by all the people, The social mind
is work whenever operate in groups-lynchng nobs
wars radio craze sudden interest in spyituasn dancing
epdemcs, and
All this of course you have observed While each of US
lis separate being to be sprouts or branches
ia tree That is, draw current out of the
fBame high tension wires as other people.
Somewhere connected togeher-n the mysterious
regions OF the subconscous psychic and possibly out in
the fourth dimension Having much in common it's
wonder that there isn't brotherhood man.
intense spirit of working for the of humanity
1.-THE giant) instead of for SELF
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1923-05-30
Piles Can Be Cured
Without Surgery

An, instructive book has been pub
lished by DR.. A.. S.. McCleary, the
noted rectal specialist of Kansas
City. This book tells how sufferers
from Piles can be quickly and GAS
lily cured without the use of knife,
scissors, shot" iron, electricity or
any other cutting or burning method
without. confinement to bed and no
hospital bills to pay. The method
has been success for twenty-four
years and in more than eight thous-
and coses. The book is sent post
paid free to persons afflicted with
piles or other rectal troubles who
clip. this item and mail it with name
and address TO Dr., McCleary, .D542
Parkview Sanitarium. Kansas City.
Mas /.
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1923-05-30
SICKNESS

Many of infectious diseases of relatively recent
origin and due to the artificial unnatural life of civilization
Hectares W. B. Scott Princeton professor.
. As mans history typhoid is youngster among
diseases Scott says Typhoid bothered Caesars
armies. It 1923 before typhoid differentiated from
typhus Panama, hobed of yellow fever until matter Of
months ago. had germs Of this disease late 1914
4 Well find fin and preventive of these days
Then nature will send along disease She does fast
hs conquer the old to keep battling
lor eSiatence That battle. breeds strength. =
The Bismarck tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, N.D.) 1916-current, 1923-05-30
ADvF'NTI1REoF
THE TWINS
By Olive Barton Roberts

This is a story about how Nancy
dressed up the Ragsies.
One day in Ragsy Land Nancy had
an idea. Ppm going to make you
some new Clothes" she said.
who for?" asked Mister Tatters,
the little Ragsy man.
"Why all Of the Ragsies," she an
swered. "You just shan't go around
any longer looking like ragamuffins."
Mister Tatters looked down at his
old overalls all worn to rags and
slowly shook his head. 81 don't think
we need Them" he said. 1--WE can
work better in old buds"
ooh, you'll soon get used to them"
said Nancy. "You might want to
give another party"
That's sol" said Mister Tatters
reluctantly. perhaps it would be
better if we dressed up little. The
Fairy Queen sent US some cloth one
time, but we never had any use for
it. You'll find it in my best bedroom
bureau drawer"
Nancy got her scissors and shipped
and cut and fitted and sewed and
pretty soon she had every single
Ragsy man fixed up in a brand-new
suit. She made some with long-tai
coats and tights like the Brownies
| wore. And she made some with
belted TUNES like the gnomes wore
And she made some with shor
jenkins like the elves wore.
But when they were finished no
body looked happy.
1--WE shall have to change GU
names now because we aren't Rag
sizes any more said Rag Tag sor
rowfully. eve oil look like dudes.
"And we'll have to stop helpin
folks because we're too dressed up,
said Bob Tail soberly.
"Well, if that's the way you fes
about it.. you'd better take your oil
clothes back" decided Nancy. "Her
they are, every one of them"
! And you should have seen 'tf
Ragsies grab, my dears. 1t reall
was shocking.
(To Be ,Continued.)
| Copyright. 1928, NEA Service, Inc
4 Dry Cleanire. Pressin
4 Dyeing. Repairing. Call 5
= -