San Antonio light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1911-1993, 1923-04-29

Speed TO Eight Miles an Hour-No
Tramps Allowed. l kind of favors
the sound of that name-Plentiful
Valley. And as I remarks to the
Sweet Caps Kid, We ain't no autos
and we amt no tramos but merely
| two professional men, looking for
chance TO practice our profession.
I'VE rambles on until it must be
going on towards nine forty-fiye
o'clock, and comes to a neat bungalow
on a green slope inside of n high
white fence. There's n venerable party
setting on the front porch, in his
shirt-sleeves. lie looks beneficent and
well fed.
Pull down your vest, son-boy,' l
says to Sweet Caps, and please re-
member not to drink your coffee out
of the sasser. / have growing con-
v;ction.' | says, that We are about to
partake of refreshment.'
Hadn't we better sell this ancient
guy few Bermuda oats, or some
thing to start off with? says he.
Not until after we have et.' i
says; business before pleasure. And
anyway i says, L works best on
full stomach. Follow your dear
uncle | says. and don't do nothing
till you hear from me-
with that l opens the gate and We
meanders up neat gravel path. As
we draws near. the venerable party
takes his feet down off the ratings.
Come in he says cordially, come
right in and rest your face and
hands. You're out nice and early
Suffer u.s. 1 says, to introduce
ourselves. We are a couple of prom
inent tourist-pedestrians walking from
Moo Yawk to Portland. Oregon. on n
bet. This i says. pointing TO Sweet
Caps. is Young Twinkletoes. and l
am commonly knowed as old King
Lightfoot the First. BY an unfortun-
ate coincidence l says. we got sep
arated Mt an early hour from nur pro-
vision wagon. as n result of which
we have omitted breakfast and feel
the omission severely. If we might
impose I says. upon your good ma
ture to the extent Of
Don't mention it, he says; take
two or three chairs and set down, and
we'll talk it over. To tell you the
truth he says, I was jest setting
here wishing somebody would come
along and visit with me a spell. I'm
keeping bachelors hail. he says, and
raising chickens on the side. and
sometimes l get mite lonely. Il
guess maybe the Chink might scare up
something, although he says. to tell
you the truth there amt hardly bit
in the house. except a couple of milk
fed broilers and some fresh tomattuses
right out of the garden and a few
hot biscuits and possibly some razz-
berries with cream; for I'm a simple
feeder he says, and a very little
satisfies me-
"He pokes his head inside the door
and yells to a Jap 10 put two more
places at the table. So we reclines
and INDUCES in edifying conversation
upon the current topics of the day
and. very shortly, nourishing smells
begin for to percolate forth from with
in, causing me to water Mt the mouth
until / has all the outward symp-
toms Of being an ebb-tide. But this
here pernicious Sweet Caps Kid: he
can't let well enough alone. Observ-
ing copious signs of affluence upon
every side he gets ambitious and would
abuse the sacred right of hospitality
about half to three-quarters of an
hour too soon. Out of the tail Of my
eye secs him reaching in his pocket
for the educated pasteboards and
gives him the high sign TO soft pedal,
but he don't mind me. Out he comes
with 'em.
"A little harmless game of cards,
he says. addressing the elderly guy,
entitled he says, California euchre.
I have here, you will observe, two
jacks and an ace-the noble ace of
spades. ] rifle and shuttle and drop J
'em in o row. the trick being to pick I
out the ace. Now, them goes on this
besetted Sweet Caps. with a winning ]