The Birmingham age-herald., 1923-03-18
CH|RP IF ROBIN AND PRESS AGENT HINTS IF CIRCUS
Dexter FelIoWes Bans All But Most Refined of Humor for
 His Whimsical Hyenas
BRIDGEPORT. Conn. March IT,

BRIDGEPORT. Conn. March It. This is circus country about here.
 To the kids teetering on the fence about the winter quarters of the Ringling- Barnum X Bailey shows, the silly little fool of first robin. catching his death of cold. is only a reckless witness giving needless cor roboration of Dexter Fellowes. Mir. Fellowes is the pussywillow of Bridgeport and spring isn't officially here until he shows up on drizzly day in March to interview the ami mals. He is the press agent of the circus. and. they do say, no small Dexter shows up in Bridgeport to have d social laugh with the hyenas it is certain sign that the circus is about to crawl out of the mud which
 In turn is certain sign that spring
 is nighabouts if not to hand.
 As a rule. AIr. Fellowes is able to keep his visit a secret, but the newso papers have way of finding things out and thls time he was ambushed as he sloshed up one of the side canals of Bridgeport, the beautiful Venice of New England, on has way to the winter quarters of the circus.
 Dear me-" said MT. Fellowes, chewing his slippery elm in great annoyance, how on earth did you gentlemen find me out?''
 MT. Fellowes took a fresh splinter of slippery elm.
 Have you anything more to say?' he was ask ed
 Very Retiring. Indeed.
 Very little more" said Mir. Fei- loves, than last year. can only say that the circus is taking to the road next week and will play five or six weeks in New York. after which it will strike out for the west, by way of Philadelphia, as usual. We prefer to withhold information from the press concerning the rare and savage beasts. The astounding, as tonishing and stupendous ring per- formers, the eye-blistering grandeur of the magnificent tableau or the side-splitting and eonvulsing antics or clownsI of whom there are 250. which number is certified by some government department in Washing ton. What department is it that has charge of the clown census?" Mr. Fellowes asked. turning to Zip, the famous whatizzt.
 Could it be the house committee on mempership?" Zip proposed
 "I don't really think so." MT. Eel iowes went on, after d gentle pull at flask Of cod liver oil, he being from WaItham or some such place up in Massachusetts. "At any rate, as I was saying, we seldom confide in the press as this tends to attract large crowds which, however welcome they may he, frequently are unable to get in because we cannot seat more than 10000 at our afternoon performance which starts prompt at 2;15, or cur evening performance which begins on the dot of o'clock.
 Refined Mcrriment only.
 "I should very much like to say, however, that our hyenas are stick lers for good clean fun and to add that they very much resent being told that one about the travelling salesman who returned homo unex- pectedly or any similar stories. A decent hyena, like you or me, can en- joy a hearty laugh over the story of what little Gertrude, age 3 said to her mother while saying her prayers We have all jokes certified by the New York Society for the Suppress si1n of Vice before we let the keepers tell them to the hyenas.'
 At this moment there came loud roars of suspicious mirth from the hyena house nearby. There were no feminine hycna voices in the chorus.
 "I'll bet that darncd keeper has been telling those bachelor hyenas d stag story" said Mr. Fellowes. for no story about little Gertrude ever got a laugh the like of that. "rhe bach n
 Mr. Fellowes looked at his watch and took a pill,
 'I wish one of you gentlemen would suggest a good name for our new big blue mandrill which is sort of monkey and the only one of it's species in captivity"
 Feelings Easily Hurt.
 One of the gentlemen suggested calling the blue mandrill managing editor" but Mir. Fellowes said "no:" that after all he must consider the feelings of the blue mandrill which is the only one of it's species in captiv- ity and which may be seen for the one price of admission at each and every performance of the new and stupefying wonders gathered from the remotest quarters of the earth at no stint of expense.
 'I am sorry. gentlemen" said MT. Fcllowes, reverting to his slippery elm again, that l cannot give you, any information concerning the Ring ling -Barnum X Bailey greatest show on earth. hope yCu will not find it necessary to publish anything in the papers. Have you all the pie lures you need? In case you wish to write any letters perhaps. gentlemen, there are plenty of typewriters in our office I can have the boy fix you up with paper. Oh. no trouble at all"