The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1923-02-11
Col. s
THE DUKE AND HIs WIFE,
Bartlett Paire's Thrilling
BY jim RING

11A8 00A0O wiz WAA0 CIV VI
did like kcstoCm balls
whisslde ole black jos. as
she sat by her dressing label or
burro and coined her redish
awburn treses. She was tired
like q old Querie OF Jerminy ana
was sertinly . site for soar Ives.
Cruilly In to this sene Of pease
and rest come . sharp rap On the
dOre.
''Well wot IL IL" triled the
duless In betwene closed tethe.
mot wot Il It but who IL 1t.
Anser It ie me" LATED the polite
duke her hnsbun for In dede ii
wuz nobody else frum the hawI
outside Of the rm.
well for mersy sales cum IN
and don't ware out yure nukels
ON the dore.'
''Hot dog amt I the waiter
melons rine'' the duke chided as
he enterd the rm. clad in the
garbeje Of q corteer Of the rane
Of Louis the XIV.
Wheel exclaimed his spowz
f1inging her joold arms hi up
into the are Of her close boodwor.
well for wy the vile hill
larety," sed the duke with q
slitely gloomy lecture. 81 didn't
ask to go to this damn thing IN
the furst place."
"Ha ha ha'' continued the
dukess giving hursele over to
crate birsts Of rawcuss murtll.
The dressing label or burro rocked
under the explosion OF her gud
nachur and her littel chowchow
dawg named elk Bang in the
chimes stiIe yaped and scratched
vanely at the dore. to be let our.
The duke cud stand il no
longer. He, opend the dore AHA
he and elk Bang went out to-
gether in q mad rush. At q
cornur In the hawl the duke
tripod over Clil Bang and dea-
sended to the fore with a gastly
noyse vile the inacent dawg was
almost squashed under him.
"Ah there is always the
CLEVER sed the duke arizing
like buch whete doe. and stag
gering tord the kitchen with 4
mad glare in his iyes and his wig
OF hena kris one-haff way off his
nobel brow.
Go BE Continued.J
SUGGESTED epitaph for the 1aux
pas artistic in the etiquette
ads:
She lost her status
In New York
For munching olives
From q fork.
o.
CERTAIN writer's have a cute
trick of saying, "At the
risk Of being taken as press
agents for Such and Such "a
Thing" they must nevertheless
say word in praise Of This or
That. You know the style. Yes.
Well.
At the risk OF being taken as a
press agent for transportation
companies, must nevertheless
say a word in praise of travel
Travel, you know, is 30 broaden
ing. A striking instance of its
value was personally eavesdropped
in the mobbed lobby Of q movie
house.
The monologist had just been
over to Sweden, his y old country.
Said he to friend:
Oscar. 1t amt like here like
what it is over there. You might
not got one cent In your clothes
in Stockholm, but you could 80
out to q shop like what o delica-
lessen it is here, and say that
cheese It looks good, cut me of
it a piece. And the man he
would take it his knife and cut
for you a slice. And he could
say that, well, the cheese it
amt so good. Let me taste
some Of it that ham there. And
he would give to you. just nike
what You said. Why, you might
could 60 eli morning. and eat Il
up everything there was In thO
shops. and never spend penny.
Not o cont. Can you do Nlee that
in them the del1cA4e0seng In
washingtonf Huhf 70. no.
Oscarr'
IVES, sir, ana when Jess trains
- down sufficiently for that re-
turn match with Dempsey, sonae-
body's sure to invent a Nonesuch