davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington times., 1923-06-30
EVIDENCE

Long had he boasted that he was
immune s'aF''oF 81
From flappers lures: the summer
moon. 80
A girl, a lovely night, meant
naught to him: S'*Sas -
He woud not fall fof witching
eyes or figure trim. ''''
t.%t: 49, -
The waves of girlish beauty beat
in vain s2%s
About him; the most charming
Jane s''- .'
Was baffled every time that she
would try fit . = ests
Her winsome arts upon this proud
and hard-boiled' guy ~.'&
a&xa ~.-:t
And still he's boasting that he'll
never be f'F-t'., "
A mark for Cupid's archery
But 1 am wise, I know whereof
For now I've seen the earmine
The Washington times., 1923-06-30
DUMBELLS

The guy who'll emulate 30 Peep
today and let a few sheep roam
especially in the vicinity of Wall
Street.
The high-collar galloot who real
II thinks that some day he'll win
an argument from a telephone
operator.
The old-fashioned Teller who still
insists that automobiles are play.
things and that bicycles will come
The bird who still carries
watch that has to be wound with
a key.
The nnesdame who leaves fly
. paper loose in an orphanage.
The Washington times., 1923-06-30
SOCIAL ERRORS

Telling your wife that you get
q raise.
Striking a match to look at the
gas tank.
Asking a lady friend how old
she Is.
Shooting craps with the land.
lord.
Beating. your boss In a game
Of golf.
Playing ring toss with your
wtfe's bracelets.
The Washington times., 1923-06-30
AS They Do
in Utopia
BY Les COilIziin.

<<r PRONOUNCE yoa1 man
- and wife, said the Rev.
Sticklebacls 10 he fin
isfied the ceremony. 50 And I
wish you all the luck IN the
world, because yOuawilI csrtainly
need IT,"
.T1hank you, said aaUpson
Downs: the blusnihg brideeroom.
II always was lucky st pinochIe.
50 / thought I'd take 8 shot Mt
matrimony.'
Where do you intend to
spend the honeymoon?" inquired
the minister as he pocketed his
fee.
why guess wei 90 down
{ to New Orleans. said Epson.
s::;sNe were going to Niagara Falls,
but Mamie isn't q very strong
swimmer"
New Orleans il . nice place,
commended the minister I al
most wish could 90 with you
and take In the Mardi Gras cele-
bration."
well. we won't leave until the
morning, and lnaybe you'd change
your mind by then, stggested
Epson. "supposing you come
ever to the house tonight and
well talk it over while we play
few games Of rummy. Mamie
and would be glad to stay up
and talk to you"
Good morning, Mr.. Pinlus.
said Mrs. Fluffy Ruffles az she
entered the offices Of the Soft
Hardware Company. ~ won
dered If you could give my son
Phosphate a position in your
store for the summer"
I'VE need q few boys in the
delivery department :. reflected
the manager. Do you think he
would care to drive wagon7'
oh / wouldn't think OF let
ting him do anything like that"
objected Mrs. Ruffles, ..he might
get q sunstroke. / thought it
would be nice IL he could work
here In the office ana rest no
where It was cool and pleasant. I.
II tell you what wen do,"
said Mr.. Pinkus, che can take my
place here in the office and I'll
drive one of the wagons. The
doctor told me I should be out in
the open more. and this will give
me q chance to do 1t.
"Can you give me some free
advice. doctor?" inquired Mrs.
Benny Dictine. the wife OF the
famous bootlegger.
why. surely" replied Doctor
Croakem; none of my patients
ever pay me, anyway. What is
it this time. your liver or your
stomach"
Neither" said Mrs. Dictine,
"it's my daughters boy friends.
Ever since they found out that
my husband was = bootIeeger
they hang around the ahouse in
droves and I can't get rid Of
them"
81 should think that would help
the business" said the doctor.
''They never have any money"
explained Mrs. Dictine. IF they
would buy few bottles or marry
my daughter 1t wouldn't be so
bad"
why don't you try giving
them a lecture on the evils Of
drink" suggested the doctor.
That's a great idea" said
Mrs. Dictine enthusiastically.
The Washington times., 1923-06-30
Have Smile
With Us

With Us !
By Nat N. DOrfman.
T HE Sioux Indians claim the
Government owes them $780,
100000 for lands seized, and
so they're Sioux-ing for it.
The month of June contains
five pay days, but the butcher
grocer and baker are as well pre-
pared to take. it as the months
that have only four.
Murder. murder, everywhere,
and not wife convicted.
~ Hysterical Note.
q General Sherman said "war Is
he'll" but how was he to know
some day there would be Reno?
Signs of Summer.
The sudden return Of the
neighbor's chickens in your gar
den.
The renewed visits of the sales
man selling vacuum cleaners.
Vacation literature strewn all
about the house.
The independence of your ice
dealer after a hard Winter.
Repainting Of the barns by the
advertising companies from one
brand of pills to another.
1t has been discovered that
many persons supporting the pro-
hibition movement carry TASKS
on their persons. Hip-ocrites, as
1t were.
For Brainy People.
Q-what is the first sign OF
Summer?
A-The announcement there
viii be-, a coal shortage next
Winter.
Qs-How can I keep the neigh
boris chickens off my place?
A.-By sending your good
looking sons on a vacation.
Q.-Do you believe we can
speak to the dead?
A.--Yes. don't you sometimes
get central in telephone booth?
Care men more outspoken
than women?
A.-No; q woman never lets
mere man outspeak her.
s.r Warning Note.
When the wife says: Dear, you
must be tired there's a c. o. D.
package on the way somewhere.
Phil Ossify Says
We wonder IL open-work hos
iery is manufactured in an open
shop?
The opera season is over and
q lot of people won't have to lie
about liking it until Fall.
The fellow that used to break
through the traces nowadays
breaks through the telegraph
poles and fences in his machine.
If the spread Of the automobile
continues, they will all be one
horse towns.
man arrested for stealing
sazaphones in New York and a
committee has been organized to
raise money for the erection Of a
monument to him.
Did you ever stop to think an
undertaken is face to face VITA
grave problems every day, and,
unlike some Of our statesmen,
never gets ruffled?
DUMBELLS
The guy who'll emulate 30 Peep
today and let few sheep roam
especially in the vicinity of Wall
Street.
The Washington times., 1923-06-30

The opera season is over and
a lot OF people won't have to lie
about liking it until Fall.
The Washington times., 1923-06-30
Phil Ossily: Says

We wonder X open-work hos
iery is manufactured in an open
shop?
The Washington times., 1923-06-30

Z 7 Warning Note.
When the wife says: Dear, you
must be tired" there's q c. o. D.
package on the way somewhere.
The Washington times., 1923-06-30
By Nat N. DOrfman.

" HE Sioux Indians claim the
Government owes them $780,
600 900 for lands seized, and
The Washington times., 1923-06-30

DID you ever stop to think an
undertaken is face to face VITA
grave problems every day, and,
unlike some Of our statesmen,
never gets ruffled?
The Washington times., 1923-06-30

Care men more outspoken
than women?
A.-No; a woman never let's
mere man outspeak her.
The Washington times., 1923-06-30

a Hysterical Note.
a. General Sherman said war Is
HE'LL" but how was he to know
some day there would be Reno?
The Washington times., 1923-06-30

g.. man arrested for stealing
sazaphones in New York and a
committee has been organized to
raise money for the erection Of a
monument to him.
The Washington times., 1923-06-30

The fellow that used to break
through the traces nowadays
breaks through the telegraph
poles and fences in his machine.
The Washington times., 1923-06-30

II the spread Of the automobile
continues, they will all be one
horse towns.
The Omaha morning bee. [volume] (Omaha [Neb.]) 1922-1927, 1923-05-21
Sweden Floats
Big StateLoan
New Indebtedness Absorbed
Directly by Investing
Public.

Stockholm, May 20.-Swedens na-
tional debt per capita Is only $3.50.
while that Of the United States per
capita is s226.90. This Is one of the
interesting bits Of statistical informa-
ton reported by the Swedish Gen
eral Export association in connection
with the new Swedish state loan
which has just been made. A still
more significant statement sheds light
on Sweden's credit position. which has
been established during the last few
years.
At the end OF 1921 the assets Of the
national account. including cash on
hand. treasury funds. post and tele-
graphs, state railways, water power
works, domains. shares and loan
funds. exceeded the national debt by
1916, 400 900 kroner. about s412 ,o00,-
900, as against a corresponding excess
of 1918 of about s241 900, 900.
The new Swedish state loan, which
has just been absorbed by investors.
bears interest at 12 per cent, and
was sold at 81 An innovation In
placing this foam was that II was offer
ed 10 the public directly by the treas
MY department instead OF being han
died by the banks.
Considerable sums which would 9th
erwise have been expended for COM
missions were thus saved.
The Omaha morning bee. [volume] (Omaha [Neb.]) 1922-1927, 1923-05-21
Father of Florenz
Ziegfeld. Jr., Dies
Noted Musician and Founder
of Chicago Institution Ex
pires of Pneumonis.

Chicago, May 2o.-Dr T1orznz
Ziegfeld. noted musician. died at his
home here today. He was founder OF
the Chicago Musical college.
DR.. Ziesfeld and his wife celebrated
their 5sth wedding anniversary a
week ago last Thursday. The noted
musician suffered a cold which de-
veloped into pneumonia last Tuesday.
The end came Al 40 this morning.
He vas So. and wac born in Germany.
DR.. Ziegfeld was the father ot
Fiorenz Ziegfeld. II. producer Of The
Follies"
At the bedside when DR.. Ziegfeld
died were his widow. Mrs. Rosalie
Ziegfeld. his sons. William K. ana
Florenz. Of New York. and his daugh-
ter. Mrs Willis E. Buhl Of Detroit.
Billie Burke. noted actress and wife
OF F1orenz ZieEfeld. jr.. Was unable
to accompany her husband here from
New York because OF the Illness Of
their daughter. She is expected TO
arrive for the funeral. which probably
viii be Tuesday.
In his youth Or. ziegfeid studied
under famous masters-Moscheles.
Reinecke. Plsidy. Papperitz. wenzel
and David
lie founded the Chicago Musical
college IN. 1864
The Omaha morning bee. [volume] (Omaha [Neb.]) 1922-1927, 1923-05-21
Homebrew Mash
Swamps Sewers
Montana Official Pleads With
Folks Who Make Their Own
to Use Discretion

Lewiston. Mont, May 20.-City
Engineer r. Z. Longshore is having
trouble with the homebrewers and
moonshiners. and although he has not
Joined the federal or state prohibi.
tion forces. his wrath is great.
The sewers In Lewistown. Long
shore explains. are adequate, under
ordinary circumstances, to serve the
purpose for which they were con-
structed, but recently there has been
enough homebrew mash dumped in
to the pipes, he declares. TO dam up
the Missouri river.
Last week the city engineers force
had a real job in cleaning out ae-
oumulated mash in one of the mains.
The effort was finally successful, but
Longshore believes the trouble will
recur, for he has not been able TO
locate the offenders. lie hegs people
Who make homebrew 10 put their
mash down the pipes in small lots
instead OF a barrel at a time.
Longshore says IL this appeal Is
disregarded the only solution left Is
the laying OF storm sewers in all
sections Of the town. or perhaps an
even larger type. which he desig-
aated as "homebrew system
The Omaha morning bee. [volume] (Omaha [Neb.]) 1922-1927, 1923-05-21
Health
/ sCiven
as Reason
British Prime Minister Sends
Resignation TO King George
on Advice of Ply
sicians.
Voice Is Still Affected

London. May 20--Andrew Bonar
Law resigned today az premier OF
Great Britain.
A statementissued at No. 10 Down
ing street. the official residence Of the
prmeier. said:
Mr.. Bonar Laws voyage did not
improve his health. On his return
TO London Saturday he was examined
by medical advisers. in consequences
of whose advice Mr.. Law Immediately
placed his resignation in the hand of
his ma ajesty the king. who graciously
accepted l."
King George treceived a letter from
Mr.. Bonar Law nj which the retiring
premier said that. according to the
urgent recommendation Of his medi-
cal advisers, he desired to resign the
premiership and as first lord OF the
treasury.
In accepting the premier's resigna.
tion. King George expressed the deep.
es tregret and inquired as 10 Mr..
Bonar Laws health
The bulletin issued today by Mr..
Bonar Laws physician said:
In spite Of his rest, the prime min
ister's voice still IS unsatisfactory
and We are unable to promise an inn
within a reasonable time
The state Of the premiere general
health Is not good"
The Omaha morning bee. [volume] (Omaha [Neb.]) 1922-1927, 1923-05-21
Mudbank Saves Five Chicagoans
From Plunge Over Niagara Falls

Niagara Falls. May 20.--Only n
and luck saved a party Of
five Chlcagoans from being carried
over Niagara falls in r motorboat.
The motorboat, the Sunbeam, is
owned by the Basker Iron company
OF Chicago. II was formerly n sub
chaser and was bought in New York
recently, refitted and brought up the
barge canal to Tonawanda. Capt
George Murphy OF Chicago was in
command.
This evening the captain decided TO
make another lap to Buffalo and
spend the night there. The motor
boat was taken into the river and
the pilot being unfamiliar with' the
channel. proceeded north along the
The Omaha morning bee. [volume] (Omaha [Neb.]) 1922-1927, 1923-05-21
Luxembourg to
HaveOwn Army
Army of 800 Men 10 Be Or
ganized - Reserve of
l.i00 Planned.

Brussels. May 2o.-The Journal
dssch" announces that the Grand
Duchy Of Luxembourg Is about to rec
ognize its army. II is no longer TO
be regarded as joke and treaed as
pretex for arraying a bakers dozen
Of good looking men in picturesque
uniforms so that they can make
bit OF show when the army is mus
tered for ceremonial occasions.
But II will cause no trembling
among foreign potentates. rte whole
army will consist Of only about 500
men. but they will be real soldiers and
equipped "a such. When the baby
grand duchess was born recently. the
necessary salute 20 herald the new
arrival was fired with guns that had
to be borrowed from France. Tho
new army will at least save the duehy
from a repetition of that humiliation.
Every soldier Will be given gun and
viii be taught how 10 handle f.
BY the new organization. the sol.
diers Will serve four years. and a
reserve Of 400 VIII he formed
The Omaha morning bee. [volume] (Omaha [Neb.]) 1922-1927, 1923-05-21
Bluffs Permits
for Building
Break Records
Expenditure of S87,525 Out
lined i'm Office of City
Clerk; % New Houses Are
Scheduled to Be Built.

All records during the building boom
in Council Bluffs this spring were
shattered again last week. when 36
building permits were issued at the
office of the city clerk, outlining an
expenditure of sS7.525.
Twenty-Five of the permits were for
the construction OF new homes, rang
ing from $400 to $4,000. and carry
ing a total estimated construction cost
of $3.50 The remaining IL per
mits were for remodeling. alterations
and garages. totalling s3.775.
Oscar Biesendorfer. contractor. OBJ
tanned nine permits for remodeling
homes at 1898 Fourth avenue and at
3540 Avenue B. to cost $500 each. and
the others for new homes as follows:
3541 Aveune L. $500; 3545 Avenue
E. $500; 3545 Avenue z. $4,000; $3.50
Avenue ID, s3.s00, 3603 Avenue c.
$4,000: 43s Huntington avenue, $500,
and 253S Avenue r, $500.
Six permits for new dwelling were
issued TO ]. II. koester. One was for
$4,000 home for Ed Evans at SIS
Forest Drive, and another for a $500
home for Roy Peterson at 327 Wood
lawn drive. The other were: 2600
South Seventh street. $4,000; 2s5e
Avenue L. $500; S4O5 Fifth avenue.
$500. and 21s South Twenty-elghth
street, SO ESQ.
Other larger permits issued were:
Or. A. 4. johnson, 33s Woodland
Drive. $4,000; Christian Brothers, 40
Vine street. 5000; L. A. Palmer, 2229
Sixth avenue. $4,000 w. NJ. Thomas,
435 Washington avenue. $4,000:
Charles Savage. Twelfth street and
Avenue b. 1900.
The remaining seven were for less
pretentious homes. as follows: II. y.
Robertson. 507 Twenty-fifth avenue.
1000; \. a. Jensen, i39 North Sixth
street. 81 900: \. p. Kern. zoos Ave.
nue. e. $500; Wallace BENJAMIN. two in
Wehster's addition. $500. NJ. s. Hen.
dey. 1916 Twenty.first avenue. $500,
and James A Pike. Ninth street and
Fourth avenue, $400.
The Omaha morning bee. [volume] (Omaha [Neb.]) 1922-1927, 1923-05-21
b0NAR Law RESIGNS Pre- m|ERSHIP
Picnic Is Given for
Charles F. Weller

Family picnic in honor Of Charles
F. Weller, president of the Richard
son Drug company, who celebrated
his roth birthday anniversary We'd
nesday, was held at Elmwood park.
wood park.
In addition to Mr.. and Mrs. Weller.
there were several relatives, includ-
ing grandchildren and six great
grandchildren, present at the picnic.
The list of guests included Mr.. and
Mrs. Harry S. Weller, their two
daughters. Mr.. and Mrs. James Fish
er, Mr.. and Mrs. Walter Pratt and
two children Earl Fisher and daugh-
ter. Mr.. and Mrs. Fred Clark, Mr..
and Mrs. George Howell and two
children, Mr.. and Mrs. Charles X.
Weller. Mrs. Dean Davidson and
daughter. Mr. and Mrs. f. p. Ellis,
Mr. and Mrs. Frank Patton, Mrs.
James Eager of Wichita, Kan, and
James Fisher of Lincoln.
The Omaha morning bee. [volume] (Omaha [Neb.]) 1922-1927, 1923-05-21
Valuable Skins Shown i'm
Connection With Movie

Skins Of wild animals VII be on dis
play In the lobby OF the sun thoaicr
all this week during the presentation
OF \. J. Shows picture, Hunting
Big Game tn Africa With Gun aud
Camera"
The hides are those ~ two zcbras.
a leopard and tiger In order 10
use these skins It was necessary 10
Obtain permlssion from their owners.
Hagenhach 4 Wallace. animal train
crs. through hhe National Fur and
Tanning company.
Permission was granted on condl
tion that the Sun theater insure the
skins for $4,000 Tor 10 DAYS. Foster
Barker company wrote tho insurance
The Omaha morning bee. [volume] (Omaha [Neb.]) 1922-1927, 1923-05-21
Ses;sAts;:s* g 3 > ptor and Captive Will Be
y. classmates at West Point Academy

one Filipino to be sent to West Point
each year to be trained for service
as an officer of the Philippine scouts.
The outstanding incident of Gener-
al Funston's brilliant military career,
which began when he led the 20th
Kansas voluntary infantry as its
colonel. to the Philippines in 1898,
was his capture of Aguinaldo. 1t
broke the back of native resistance to
American rule and paved the way for
peaceful development of the islands.
In the guise Of prisoner. held with
a handful of white comrades by a
force of friendly natives who posed as
members of the Aguinaldo army, the
adventurous Kansan penetrated to
Aguinaldo's mountain headquarters,
effected a dramatic capture and es-
capped to the American lines with his
prisoners. The Filipino ultimately
was released on parole. but his in
surgent activities were over.
The Omaha morning bee. [volume] (Omaha [Neb.]) 1922-1927, 1923-05-21
Rich Chinaman Writes
Will on Laundry Ticket

San Francisco. May 2o.--One Of the
stranEest legal documents ever pre-
sented 10 the local courts was the will
of Gee Chong Wong. a Chinese laun-
dryman. The will. written on the
hack of laundry ticket. was in the
Chinese language and read.
I. Gee Chong Wong. also known
as Gee Fook Sing. know myself sick
in bed; whethe4 or not viii he reeov-
cred nor do I know that l VIII live
from morning 10 night.
This is my will in case anything
happens. I give to my wife. Gee
Wong She. the whole Of my property.
which is as follows.
Money with Rank Of Italy.
Money with the Canton Bank
Also ouong Sing Lee laundry. All
of san Francisco.
"tsigaedl Gee Chong weng.'
The widow was granted letters os
adRnuis;ration and family allow
snoe ot sec monthly for herself ana
five children
The Omaha morning bee. [volume] (Omaha [Neb.]) 1922-1927, 1923-05-21
F. Malone
Throws Hat Into
Political Arena
Husband of Omaha Girl May
Be Surprise" Candidate
for President-Says
Women to Rule.
By international News Service.

London, May 20.-Dudley Field
Malone. democrat formerly collector
Of the port of New York and now an
international lawyer. dividing his time
between Paris and New York, SHE'D
his hat into the American political
ring as surprise presidential
candidate In 1924. Malone said he
believed women would rule the world
IN the future instead Of men. He is
married TO Doris Stevens. formerly Of
Omaha, a leader Of the militant
suffragists in the United States.
4 shall fight in the next presi-
Dental election" he said, possibly
as a surprise candidate. I am opposed
TO American participation in the
league Of nations or the International
court OF justice and arbitration"
Malone refused to disclose his presi-
Dental plans to any further extent
but he believes that President Hard
ing and Henry Ford will be two OF
the presidential candidates next year
In addition. he believes there viii be
an unknown"
Outlining his views Of the future.
Malone said:
Il believe in the future the world
viii be ruled by women. 1 do not re-
gard the future with apprehension.
4 man-made world has just left nil
lions OF dead upon the battlefields.
No sex could make a poorer job OF
things than the men. They cannot
govern.
Participation by the women is not
going to bring about a millennium. but
It will help the men to treat questions
Of peace and war with practical
realism.
Labor leaders in the United States
are IS years behind conservative
English labor leaders N political in
telligenee.
American foreign policy based upon
the design Of oil domination or even
world exploitation would mean an
American policy based wholly upon
commercial exploitation. I do not be-
lieye that the American people ap-
prove such 4 policy.
The Omaha morning bee. [volume] (Omaha [Neb.]) 1922-1927, 1923-05-21
Socialists Demand
Taft Be Impeached

New York. May 20-A demand for
the Impeachment Of William II. Taft.
chief justice of the United States,
for accepting an alleged annuity of
$4,000 from the Carnegie corpora
tion and an attack on the Lenine and
Trotzky brand Of Russian eommun.
ism by Alexander Cahan. editor Of
the Jewish Daily Forward. featured
the opening Of the national conven.
tion of the socialist party today. Mr..
Cahan declared that Trotzky was
big hombastio windbag." but he be.
lieyed he was sincere. and that
Lenine's physical breakdown was due.
In great part, TO his moral incapacity."
Tho resolution aimed al chief Jus.
tice Taft was adopted unanimously.
hut mono OF the delegates expressed
view on the subject.
The Omaha morning bee. [volume] (Omaha [Neb.]) 1922-1927, 1923-05-21
Students Divide Honors
in Spelling Championship

Falls City. Neb.. May 30-The 1858
spelling championship crown will te
worn jointly by Elmo Vaughn q
sci Dol district - and Michael Schlos-
ser Of the Sacred Heart academy chs
Faas City both q whom spelled cor
reotly the 10 words on which they
we're tested in the eighth erade sroup
ot the annual eontest held IN the high
school
Perfect marks - the three other
grades that participated weza made
b. Howard Rates.a Of districs s. ara
Vcsta Rrech, of -. seventh grade.
E'na Mae Jones of Stella. Ruth
Rtownson ~ Vsnlan. Helen Shaw q
Dawson. Mildred England ~ Hum-
bcldt. Agnes Shgr nherS Of Vericn.
and Mark Bsut.an of Nerdea. sixth
grade. and James Hickey 81 Dawson.
Victor Bauman Of school dlSitici -.
Irene Schneidesw &c Of A. anl ..
rene Billings e Humboldt, fi.ta
grade.
The Omaha morning bee. [volume] (Omaha [Neb.]) 1922-1927, 1923-05-21
French Airplanc Pilot
Arrested on German Soil

Munich. May s0.-The French pilot
Of an airplane forced down by engine
trouble Friday night near Schwaig.
northeast OF this city, was arrested
and his aIrplane seized on the ground
that French aircraft are not author.
ized to cross German soil. The pilot
was on the way from Prague to Paris
with ono passenger. n Rumanian. who
WAS allowed To proceed
The German government recently
protested TO France against French
planes flying over German territory.
aud called attention 10 the fact that
undesirable consequences might 10.
low In the case Of emergency land
fnuH
The Omaha morning bee. [volume] (Omaha [Neb.]) 1922-1927, 1923-05-21
Woman Killed. Three Men
Hurt When Auto Oyerturns

F.nid, uIlla, May 20.-Mrs. r. ".
Pordue of Hutchinson. kan. was
killed when a motor car IN which she
was riding overturned north OF Salt
Fork lake. Her husband. an
other man whose name could not be
learned and G II. johnson. all from
Hutchinson. were seriously injured. A
6yearold son of the Perdues cscapcd
uuharmrd