davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington times., 1923-10-29
Rubbing Some Fur the Wrong Way.

N IRIS. NORMA GILLETTE, of San Francisco, pours
nj special perfume her greenbacks that they
be traced in of theft Persons unknown loot her
bureau drawers detectives shifting for the missing
money
Here's hoping that she II fare better than certain
creuous democracy that didn't provide for the unexpected
and consequently won't get smell Of its borrowed cash
The Count de Grammant mentions In his memoirs how
exalted person demanded suspected her of unfair
play for the sake Of few shilings.
Madame he retorted royalty cheats except for
crowns So
The Oregon board of health wants the State medical ex
aminng board to revoke the licenses of practitioners who
refuse to dphthera antitoxn and smallpox
The community authority that enforces quarantine
should protect healthy citizens from roaming Infection
Promptly protested by defenders of liberty who'd rather
encounter leper the subway than interference with
personal right
But call one Of them an anarchist and he sue you for
slander Fanatics brook facts.
ganda Bankers holding enormous blocks of deprecated
European bonds logically inspired flagless
finance is entirely dollar-and-cent-imental
AntidOtes for Skepticisn1.
THE Macmillan Arctic expedition ice locked 1115 de-
grees from the North Pole listens in sermon at
Council Bluffs, Iowa. and flashes back its applause.
The writer remembers when Nicola Tesa regarded
harebrned dreamer because he foresaw the sending Of
ttspeech through mountain
Skeptcism this particular gentleman several humble
apologies Civilization lost precious opportunity By
discountng his pioneer experiments which anticipated the
most Of recent electrical development.
Like Burke he may well remind us, tI right and
perorce rest content WITH Yes are always rights but
you always right too soon.'
Happily Of creative blessed with sangune
temperament otherwise stupidity and nappreciaton
had long since betrayed progress.
AS witness ninety yearold Jonathan Begg OF Oak
land Calf perfected twelve inventions in the past ten
years optmistca plans to make the next decade the
really fruitful stage of his career.
Clip this item and show to the nearest qtter crngng
his first white hair.
tcopyrisht 1s By King
The Washington times., 1923-10-29
Sing to Glands

r ONDON-"Land Of hope and
glory Is an old patriotic
- English song, but now it has
been parodied to leland Of hope
and glory" since English doctors
have resorted to the use of glands
for treatment Of all sorts Of all
ments.
The London Medical Exhibition
was almost an exhibition Of
glands. gland extracts and gland
powders.
"The chemists laboratory Of
the future will be more like a
butchers shop than anything
else" one chemist says. Glands
have come to stay" -.
The Washington times., 1923-10-29
Our Slipping Earth
It Slides, We With It.

Professor Osborn positive proof that America
and Asia linked together by solid land That made
easy the Mongoan ancestors Of red Indians to
come over, also the animals to spread the earth
It also that England and the Continent
connected by land You may here and there the wide
headed descendant of the Basque that walked
with dry feet from Spain to England in the distant past
The fact is that whole solid of the earth is like
pond the grease cold soup floating and
breaking up occasionally here and there.
The light surface Of the earth resting inconcevaby
CORE about milk might about
plate you shook the plate little But the motions
slow don live long, they call hundred thousand years
ga long time"
The Washington times., 1923-10-29
SAP AND SALT
BY Bert Moses

AS our illusions begin to disap-
pear, so does our hair.
The main trouble with a new
idea is finding money to push 1t.
Custom rises above the law and
commands more respect than the
Gospel.
The justification of a lovers
quarrel is the fun Of making up
afterward.
The whistle in the morning does
not sound so sweet as the whistle
at night.
The most popular way to get
rich is to take anything you see
when no one is around to bear
witness against you.
Hez Heck says: eft is much
more respectable to be 'apprehend-
ed than 'pinched.'
(Copyrisht. 1S2a. Premier Syndicate. Ino.I
The Washington times., 1923-10-29
Once-Overs
tcopyrEht International Feature Service Ine,
KEEP YOUNG BY HAVING YOUNG THOUGHTS.

tcapvrrht by Ine3
KEEP YOUNG BY HAVING YOUNG THOUGHTS.
OF course is regretabe that must grow DID, but why
worry It'll
WHY look forward certain age when, if like
some persons you be crippled up with rheumatism,
have some other aiment to incapacitate you?
You NAV not be at all like any of these whom you have
pictured
You may be the exception to the rule
Yon NAV never reach that age ahead which you
slider as the age Of senle decay.
Stop worrying about time which may never be reached
when Won will be considered only around in the way.
Keep young by having young thoughts.
Keep fit by taking proper care OF yourself.
Take an interest in today not in bygone days.
The Washington times., 1923-10-29
They All Fight
We, Also, Have Done It.

Human beings queer animals And in the language
Of Judge Lands brother IF they did spring from the
monkey, they didn't spring very far ~
The Germans having been beaten in the fight with France
and some other countries busy fighting and killing
each other They breaking up their empire in small
pieces which viii make convenient for others to chew
the small pieces Because Of different opinions in politics
economics and religions k3y shooting each other
This however is German specially We had taste of
Il here in the sixties; every nation has it.
The Washington times., 1923-10-29
A Sad-Hearted Medium
The Spirits Balk, Sometimes.

Stewart Cleveland who went to New York
to win the prize Of twenty-five hundred dollars offered the
first who submitted positive evidence Of the receipt Of
spirit messages, has gone home without the cash.
Mrs Stewards failure to satisfy the committee that her
celestial correspondence the real thing be partly
adverse prejudice created in the minds of Workers.
by the fraudulent judicial writing recently detected
the part Of the weknown political mediums Murphy
Foley.
The Washington times., 1923-10-29
GARRETTP. .SERVISSON
THE MATTERHORN
Edward Whymper, First to Ascend Famous
Peak, Pitted His Iron Will Against
Natures Brute Force
By Garrett P. Serviss,

AstronomeF and Writer Scientific Topics Popular
The Washington times., 1923-10-29
WeIcIs Is the Word, he Lads.

IF OUTSTANDING allied loans were collected though we
might afford aerial fleets almost equal those Of France
wishing to know where the money can be found to amor
tie her debt at per cent interest She both
keep IN position to pay and fight.
Surely expects the world cock-ofthe-w to
trim wings clip spurs simply for the sake Of scraps Of
paper-Nsere / O. Us. How do get that wayf
Two hundred million dollars year the United States:
EnteNdez, mes eGt8, drOes hear these drol ones
rave Why, that would restriction Of flying neets)
and standing army only four times the size of ours.
Poincare wishes to realize that he's Baldwin, and
openly boasts hereH be mo such sorry bargain for his
country the British premier concluded here. Wech
the word me lads
Speaking at Campigny he declares Germany shan have
single concession-the Ruhr won't be evacuated. I've
due us.''
Admitting partial acceptance of the Hughes plan he
states that the recommendations Of any commission shall
neither bind his government result in international
conference
Exit Kaiser wilhelm: enter Kaiser Raymond. And We
fell for the game
The Washington times., 1923-10-29
CHARGE $4,000, 600, 900
TO OUR EXPERIENCE
ACCOUNT
By HERBERT KAUFMAN.

ct Us at least get laugh Of those dear departed
four billions which Louis Loucheur former minister OF
the devastated regions blunty informs Us "can't be
recovered
The situation is eptomzed by the story Of Clancy bar
tender who also waited until after delivering the goods to
take up the matter of credit.
It safe to trust Con OBrien for schooner Of beer
ne inquired Of Saloonkeeper Grogan HAS be had the
Deer9 asks Grogan. That he has, answers Clancy.
"Then it il, says Grogan.
One such International joke however should suffice to
que further local ambitions for the foreign stage.
we ever again play part in yonder theater Europes
sardonic humor lcant you hear EN- pat pockets and
parayzng crack the Treasury funnybone to attempt
slap IN the face or kick at our shins
Then, pray, where shall be- with navy that Admiral
Rodman claims can't protect So of export
because Congress hasn't funds needed sub
marines, seaplane carriers and scout cruisers?
Imperial Valley press., 1923-04-20
MANUAL P. sILvA's
CLOSING OUT SALE
MONDAY, APRIL %

milk cans, tank, buckets; John Deere mower;
rake iron wheel truck; wagon and rack;
four horse Fresno 2 sets chain harness; four
horse disc: 2 section harrow; walking plow
milk cart; "V''; Buggy; l lightning hay
baler in good condition; forks, shovels, etc. Fur
niture: 2 beds, baby bed, dresser, chiffonier,
kitchen cabinet, five burner oil stove, table,
sewing machine, oil tanks, dishes and kitchen
utensils, one large ice chest.
NOTE-Mr. Silva has sold his lease and every
thing goes for the high dollar.
TERMs-S10O or uncsr cash; over 900 H2 in
months ~ in months. Purchaser to give note
and approved security, drawing 10 per cent in
terest from date. All notes to be approved by
Clerk. No property to be removed until settled
for. Anyone buying cows or more will be
given long time monthly payments
D. L. ZINN, CHAS. JOHNSON, Auctioneers.
office $40 Main St. Phone 172
A.. II. KELLER Clerk; CLAY BREWER, Ringman
MANUAL P SILVA
Imperial Valley press., 1923-04-20

industries, manufactures, cities,
states, and the United States gov
ernment itself could get rid tomor-
row of all fixed charges, mortgages,
bonds and interest! Cost of prOdue-
tiou of everything would decrease
tremendously; prices would go
down. That is exactly what will
happen in Germany. with too low
eparations-with all fixed obliga.
items practically repudiated by in.
flation, with nothing to pay exter-
nally or internally except their own
industrial taxes.
"Our country has in our federal
budget alone annual fixed charges
of $4,000, 100000, of which about
$2,500, 900, 900 grew out of the war.
How could we, or any other eoun'
try, stand up against Germany s
low cost of production when she
emerges on new gold basis that
she is bound to set for herself If
the reparation is not fairly deter
mined ~
This danger threatening Ameri'
can prosperity will probably be
avoided, Baruch believes, if repar'
ations are set at sl2,5o0, goo, 0,00O
which figure, not including the s2,'
500, 1000, 900 already paid, be was the
first person among world statesmen
and finaneiers to declare TO be a
! Just amount.
He accentuates the necessity OF
freedom of action by Germany, the
restoration of her territory when
the amount has finally been deter
mined upon, and recognition of hel
equality amongst nations when she
shows her good faith.
l When asked about the politieal
( farm bloc, Baruch smiled and said
at is no different from any
other interest, but it is so unique
for farmers to demand and get
equality of treatment that IL aDiaz
ed everybody, who Immediately
read them stern economic and civic
lectureslH
Imperial Valley press., 1923-04-20
A HARDWORKINC
PIECE OF PAPER
The Bank Check and How II
Performs Many Different
Services for Business.

Americans are the greatest
users OF bank checks in. the
world. Less than eight per cent OF
all business transactions in the
United States is conducted with
money, or, to put 1t another way,
more than nine out Of ten trans
actions are conducted with COM
mercial instruments, Of which one
Of the most important is the check.
The use OF the check has become
universal in America because it is
o-e of the simplest yet most eff
cient business devices ever invent.
ed. The bank transactions Of Mr..
Smith, the storekeeper, illustrate
in general way those of all other
business people. Storekeeper
Smiths customers pay him for the
goods he sells to them both with,
cash and checks. At the end Of
the day he counts up the proceeds
OF the days business and finds ais
sales have amounted to, say, $500.
What does he do with this money!
He owes a large part Of 1t 10 the
other business concerns from
which he purchased at wholesale
the goods he is selling. So ine ~
these companies are In Mr.. Smiths
town, and others are located Ut
some distance from It. Even small
business would be a clumsy, com.
plieated and time-wastina affair
unless Il were for the facility Of
the bank check.
When a Check Is Useful
Mr.. Smith could pay his bills by
sending cash by mail. but this
method OF payment would be un-
wise, because Of the danger Of the
money being lost in transit. Again,
he might 60 out and buy express
or postal money orders for the
amounts due, but to do this regu.
larly would require great deal OF
his time, and would involve need.
less expense. Besides, a money or
der does only half the work a bank
check does. Although it is in real
ity a kind Of q check drawn by the
express company, or by the post
Office, in favor Of some person or
firm, it Is not returned to Mr.. |
Smith after 1t has been cashed, but
goes back to the express company
or to the post ONCE that issued it.
Or the other hand, cashed check |
after it comes back to the bank and
Is cancelled Is returned to Mr.. |
Imperial Valley press., 1923-04-20

state highway system. The meas
ures had already passed the assem-
bly,.
Governor Richardson has announ-
ccd that he will veto Ill such bills.
The assembly motor vehicle com
mittee will tonight consider further
the Breed motor vehicle bin. The
measure was discussed Tuesday
night and subjected to some miner
amendments, with the possibility
that others will be suggested to-
night
The senate insurance committee
last night tabled the lnman bill
providing for state supervision of
insurance rates and forbidding com
pacts in violation of the federal
antitrust law. An attempt will be
made to put the proposal on the
ballot us an iniatory measure, it was
announced.
Imperial Valley press., 1923-04-20

more children at Corfu. even Gill
dren of former Emperor.
The palace is only one Of many
buildings freely loaned by the Greek
government to the Near East Re
lief to shelter some OF the orphans
evacuated from the danger regions
of Asia Minor 10y the relief organ
ization. Since the Smyrna disaster
nearly twenty thousand children
have been moved from Turkish ter
ritorv to Greece.
There are another 1900 Armenian
boys at Corfu" said Mr.. Nickrev,
housed in an old, abandoned ware
house. Most of them sleep on the
floor. but some, more fortunate, oc-
cupy bins Ike shelving against The
wall. piled in tiers six deep. Sleep
ing on the floors of the Zappeion
Exposition Hall in Athens arc
thousand other boys recently
brou ght from Asia. in the Royel
Palace itself, facing Constitution
square in the heart of Athens, four
hundred girls are housed, safe from
Turkish oppression at last.
an summer hotels along the sea
coast between nine and ten thou
fand Armenian orphans have been
rivcn shelter hut some other place
VIII have to be found for them be-
io-e the Greek summer season
opens and the hotels must be sur
E'7dcTcd. One of the biggest preb-
lens facing Near East Relief now
Is, where snail these Orphans go:
until they are old enough to care
FOR themselves and sbie to earn a
living Near East Relief will not
shsnGon tnrm aud will not arain
place them within reach of Turkish
Imperial Valley press., 1923-04-20
Much Business
Faces Directors
at Bureau Meet

The next regular meeting Of the
board of directors of the Imperial
County Farm Bureau will be held
Monday, April %, at Ell Centre.
Various important matters will be
discussed, and election of new
president and director AT large from
the Brawley district will be held.
The picnic, membership drive, and
poultry committees will make re-
ports and special business for i'm
proving farm center meetings will
be discussed.
A. T. Taecker and F. A. Wolf.
president and manager Of the farm
bureau exchange, will talk on the
present position of the exchange. 1t
is imperative that every farm bu
reau director from the south end of
the county bring with him list of
all grain growers in this farm cen
ter and also bring to the meeting as
many grain growers as possible.
Imperial Valley press., 1923-04-20
WHAT'S DOING AT
STATE CAPITOL

SACRAMENTO, April lo.-Pro-
posed constitutional amendment
regulating boxing in the state may
have to be brought into effect as
an emergency measure to regulate
the state s. legislators.
ASsemblvlmen Walter Schmidt and
William Scott, both of San Fran.
cisco, commenced fair imitation
of how they do things in the squar-
ed circle, following heated words
last night when Schmidt is said to
have accused Scott of threatening
another legislator to secure his vote
on Il budget amendment. The two
members clashed on the floor of the
chamber. Schmidt $ wife and others
interposed and the belligercnts were
prevented from visiting additional
harm on each other.
lnnovatory measures abolishing
the legislature and substituting in
its place, Il council of state to be
composed of fifty members, is being
framed by Senators Romingor and
bennett for early Introduction in
tht upper nOuSc, d'cOIGihS " du
mission of the solons.' The idea
would include dividing California
INTO fifty Legislative districts on q
oasis of population. Salary of each
member would be $1,000 annually,
under the proposed measure. The
council would meet on January l
of the odd years and remain in ses
sion until all business before it is
handled.
Administration budget will not
be reported out by the senate fin
ance committee until after it is dis
posed of in the assembly according
to announcement of Senator +. j..
Gates, committee chairman. Senator
Gates declared that possible as
sembly amendments would necessi-
tate the bill being re-referred to
the senate committee if it is report.
ed out in advance of assembly dis
position.
The senate late yesterday passed
dozen bills placing county roads
in different parts of the state under
Imperial Valley press., 1923-04-20

The dispatch gave no details and
failed to give the name of the man
held. He is alleged to have made
statement, however, and authorities
OF Roberts county, in which Miami
is located, have wired San Diego
officers.
Imperial Valley press., 1923-04-20
Baruch Warns I. S. Prosperity :
Hinges on Settled Reparations
By EDWARD THIERRY
NEA Service Staff Writer
Copyright, 1928, by NEA Service)

NEW YORK, April ls.-These
are the two big things that must
be done to insure a continuation Of
prosperity in America, says Bernard
NJ. Baruch, financier, economist,
and former chairman of the War In
dustries Board:
The farmer must organize com
mercially TO market his goods CO.
operatively on a big business scale
in order that he will have a fairer
relationship established between
what he produces and sells and
what he buys. q
Industry, labor, and business
are organized to help themselves.
The farmer remains outside. For
his own salvation he must organize
commercially or he'll get nowhere.
He buys from organized industry,
and he sells as a weak individual.
The credit and other legal machin-
cry has been provided for his CO.
operative marketing, but he has not
vet been able TO rise above internal
Quarrels between rival agricultural
organizations TO safeguard his own
pocketbOok.
Above all the reparat.Ons ques-
tiOn must be settled in an equitable
way; first, so that there shall be
no situation like AIsace Lorraine,
which will surely end in another
war; second, so that Germany shall
not be forced TO undertake an i'm.
possible payment; third, 80 that oui
farmers, workers, and business men
will not be injured by Germany :
escape from a just settlement.
Baruch thus amplified his state
inent that a real danger now lying
ahead is in German domination OF
would be more dangerous TO Ameri
are fixed al too low a figure II
would be more dangerous 70 Ameri
ca, he declares. than if il were fixed
at too high rate.
"Our own prosperity is not th'
whole thing he said. "It is ;
question Of honor, with which busi
ness is inextricably bound. We ar,
in honor bound 70 see justice e
Germany as well as to France
Baruch believes that American
must have share in fixing repara
tions because il is moral obliga
tion undertaken at the time tn
armistiee was signed.
1T will be rather a grim jok
on us, ;" he said, If we will not rec
ognize this obligation even from
selfish point of view. We ough
not allow Germany to escape on tn
ground that she is too poor. If w
do, we will find it is ourselves VIII
are poor-msde poor by hard time
and Germany commercial powe
ruling the world. Then German
certainly will have won the peace
Nor should We permit Germany +
be destroyed by over-burdenin
her or stripping her of her terri
tory.
Suppose American railroads ant
Imperial Valley press., 1923-04-20

Smith, who can keep 1t as re,
ceipt IN proof Of the fact that his
bill has been paid.
More than this, in order to keep
accurate records Mr.. Smith wants
to have one account in which all
his receipts can be entered and out
Of which all payments can be
made. He therefore adopts the
course that most other business
men and women follow. He takes
his $500 to the bank, where it is
safely kept and can be drawn upon
as needed. The teller enters the
amount in small pass book,
which is a record of deposits. The
pass book is issued in Mr.. Smiths
name and is handed to him, to-
gether with a supply of blank
checks. Mr.. Smith is now ready
to pay his bills by checks up to
total OF $500.
A Complete Record
His check will be received at
any bank where the Endorsement of
the person to whom it is made pay
able, which is written or stamped
on the back of the check, is known
to be genuine. The bank receiving
the check will either pay or credit
it TO the payee, and then send it
en- to the bank in which Mr.. Smith
deposits his money, where the
amount will be deducted from his
$500 balance. The check, after be-
ing properly cancelled, will be re-
turned to him at the end Of the
month. He will then have a COM
plete record showing that he de-
posted $500, that he drew checks
Of, say, 1920 to pay some of his
bills, that he has a balance left Of
$3.50 and that his bills have been
iuly paid as shown by the car.
oelled checks with the indorse.
uents upon them.
The bank will pay all checks
presented to it bearing Mr.. Smiths
ignature as given ON his signature
lard in any sums covered by the
of his bank balance, which
,e continually increases BY depos.
IS and decreases by checks drawn
against his account This process
of making deposits and issuing
checks continues day after day.
10Th the depositor and bank keen.
ng their own records.
Millions of such transactions are
handled every day by the banks
md trust companies of the United
states. In one year more than two
hundred and fifty billions of dol.
ars in checks have passed through |
he New York Clearing House
Ilone. Payments of these vast
ums are made without the use of
my actual money. A wonderful
ystem has been built up by the
Use of the small slip of paper we
all the bank check. The check is
ssential to the business and COM
aercial life of the present day.