The Washington times., 1923-02-11
TEL EPHONE SERVICE
in HEAVEN is POOR:
OPERATORS STUPID
Mark Antony Says Cleopatra Still Cures for
Him, But He and Helen Of Troy Arc Working
In Hospital Now, TranSfuSfng 'Bluc Spirit
Blood" to Patients Teachers Busy Giving
Courses In Penmanship. Surgery and Flying.

- 0u0A
rolstol cgmss - &cayo1av .
ninuta.' ard saOs Isgd 1fbr.
ensr 1wE.bts that Hoek aEnao Z
have ben hsra. Z I'm Ind ysu
CHOSE. - tnaa r. u w1n taArA
you mndh ] now want 20 givO
you Q short lesson On mind. BODY,
and sOu 4.
Nov. uu can imagine what q
sum ex1gaw York book puh1iaher
would pay Tolstot for the en-
elusive rights to that work writ
ten IA the great beyond Perhaps
some day Ala Mana WIN produce
the Tolstoi manuscript.
T@lstOi then invites KitcheneP 20
. class he conducts. They enter q
la1rge. black machine and race.
Trough the night. After what
seemed about q minutes ride. the
machine suddenly stops. They
descend. Kitchener following Toll
stoi. Suddenly the British general
draws back. amazed. for he sees In
. huge space . large airship,
shaped like q torpedo. They travel
for Q long time. rising eli the
while, and finally come to q cold,
high atmosphere. where they dis
embark ION the invention plane"
It appears that Tolstoi has taken
. to promotion Of flying. Then they
visit Q wireless department. Old
Tolstoi shows him how to connect
with the earth. They still must
be quite backward as they have to
make the connection to earth
through an operator. for the toll
operator for the earth shouts back,
rather gruffIy. ''Who do you want
to talk to-"
OPERATORS DUMB.
ST want the British Parliament
Immediately" answers Kitchener.
"Where7" answers the saucy op-
orator, for evidently she doesn't
know where the British Parlia-
nnents IL located. London. Eng.
land answers Kitchener, but to
the heavenly operator London.
England" means nothing. She
wants direction, and demands,
What direction?"
Tolstoi then coaches Kitchener:
Say London. southwestern part
Of England, northern part Of the
earth plane" After all, II Lord
Kitchener has made these revela-
tons to Ala Mana, heaven cannot
be any better place than the earth,
for, as you see, they have the
same squabble with the telephone
operators.
Kitchener does as Tolstoi directs,
and Immediately there comes q
low, humming sound. with voices
from the little box before him.
Now let Kitcheer ten the rest him.
self.
"Tolstoi pressed a button In the
side Of the booth and pointed d.
rectly above the small board.
looked UP and saw what appeared
to be a mirror. I watched it. The
humming now came like pleasant
singing. and. within a few mo-
ments, there came the London
streets I knew so well, then the
Parliament and court buildingg."
Kitchener goes to the class in
numerals and finds that the pro.
lessor in charge Of the Heavenly
class in arithmetic Is Mr.. Glad.
stone himself. Then Kitchener
tells us Of the hard work imposed
on Britain's greatest statesman.
as he is assigned to teach seven
teen classes, literature, politics.
chemistry, architecture, science,
invention, mind elements, astral
bodies, thoughts realized, surgery
(can you imagine Gladstone teach.
ing SURGERY. pennanship, art.
music, science Of the physical,
aviation. correct flying, and
spirit"
WHERE'S CLEO NOW?
Kitchener asks Mark Anthony:
Where is Cleopatra now?" An
thony smiles, and with q roguish
twinkle in his eyes, says: "She
is mighty tame now"
Kitchener wonders what made
Anthony 50 facetious In hts an
swers, and coaxes him, ''Come,
come, surely you have no grudge
against herr"
Then Anthony tells all about
it, just like q sympathetic nurse
who soothes her patient. He tells
Kitchener that he met Cleopatra
in the astral world, and after q
while they had flesh sentiment"
which caused him to fan from q
high position to that Of attendant
In the Blue Spirit Blood Hospital.
Helen Of Troy works htera. too.
cleopatra 10 on the plane Of
hut she 10 net al.
Anthony tells kltch.
ener. she n wantlna me as
badly 80 I want hsp. { thinh &c
SIN cares taf ma.s