The Washington times., 1923-05-30

H Luoy HdVO q COukb0 va A'|""
20 spend before their train leaves
they go up and ring your door
bell and ask for yOM TO show
them through your flat.
OF course, they hate to trouble
you, that's why they usually come
at dinner time.
Then after you show them all
through the house they sit down
IN the parlor and pick it to pieces.
They go over to. the window
every once in while and you
think they're admiring the view.
but they're only looking to see If
their train has come in yet.
They ask II you're allowed to
keep pets. If you say Eyes,"
they'll claim they wouldn't 1.-Two
In o place where there were dogs
or cats, and If you answer "No,"
they'll say they wouldn't think Of
moving into house where they
weren't allowed to keep them.
They don't want you to be
agreeable. they came to find
fault.
And II they can't find fault
with your place they'll 60 to
some other apartment where they
can.
They're not going to let you
spoil their whole day just by be.
ing agreeable.
The next thing they ask you
shout Is the rent. II you tell
them it's three hundred q month
they'll say it's too high. II you
tell them it's seventy five dollars,
they'll tell you they're looking for
. more expensive place.
II you have a garage, they've
got no automobile. II you haven't
q garage, they've got two ma
chimes.
Then they want to know If yOn
have to pay the rent in advance
and If 1t would be all right to pay
part Of It on the first and the
rest on the fifteenth.
The woman will say, ''I like
your fiat very much, but OF course
I'd want my husband to see it,"
Then you ask her when her hus-
hand will be in town and she'u
say. "oh, don't know. I'm not
married yet"
Then a little later you discover
that she isn't even engaged.
You're expecting any minute tc
have her ask you to hold the
place until her sweetheart pro-
poses.
You ask her to give you a dc.
pOsit on it and she wants te leave
you fifty cents.
She says If you want a large.
deposit she'll 30 home and get it.
You ask her where she lives and
she says. Portland. Oregon"
Then after she beats Won dowu
on the rent and has you agree to
lot Of changes and repairs she
tells you that she's just a tourist
passing through town and wanted
70 know II she was paying tho
much for her flat back home.
Copyright. 1929. King Feature.
syndicate. Inc.)
First Monkey-Well, how are
you snatching?
Second Monkey-oh, not 80 slow!
II the Johnny there wasn't so beast.
~ polite I'd have had a set of false
teeth by now!-Passing Show lion.
dom.
The dearer the cigars become.
the shorter become the butts."-
Simplicissimus (Munich).
Chairman-I think we'd better
begin.
Lecturer-But there isn't anyone
IN the hall.
"Ah, I forgot to tell you. The Iec-
ture 10 being broadcast."-Week.
~ Telegraph Nondon).
have only seen him twice. but
I shall marry him."
That's right. You will probably
change your mind If you wait until
you know him better."-Tyrihans
tChristiania.
An after'dinner orator said.
prior to the Volstead act: IT'S
IN the wonderful insight inter
'urnan nature that Dickens gets
the pull over Thackery; but on
tother hand, It's in the brilliant
shafts of satire, t'gether with a
keen sense O. humor, that Thack-
ems gets the pull on Dickory.
It's just this: Thickery is the