The Birmingham age-herald., 1922-10-22

bDelllnBt was lut bEcdtuot IltclicS- tual of his time. Third. the British the stocks of British military uni- forms in Belgium. And isn't 1t equally new that the Kaiser, who calls him self Gods representative, can sell his memoirs at maximum price to the newspapers of the people represented by him as cunning enemies and per jured robbers, and that the all high est war lord, who flees in fear to a foreign country, can preach from that safe refuge to compatriots whose courageous endurance in the miseries of the war is not denied by their bitterest enemy?
 "My Beloved Uncle1
 Moreover nobody can judge the books 15 chapters without knowing tn sixteenth, or decapo movement of the crowned virtuoso. Here, ladies. and gentlemen, is an extract there from which may whet your appetites: King Edward. my beloved uncle. was so swollen with envy and hatred against me that he could not button tho bottom button of his waistcoat Czar Nicholas was a weakling who never kept his word. King Victor Emmanuel was jealous of my manly heroic figure and my sympathy with the popular mood. President Poin care was blinded with the desire of rev .nge and because of my fame hated monarchy. while the little states could not resist tho orders f the big ones, which In turn were obliged to obey the dictates of the grand orient of the Masonic lodge and other Jews. But Americans made their greatest mistake. They would never have been brought into tho war against me by Northcliffe. Tar dieu and company if they had known m. plans.
 "They will be pale with shame and regret when I tell them. Although 1 knew the President of the United States could not return my visit 1 in- tended directly after the conclusion of peace to fly over Cousin Georges land, prostrate in the dust. in . Zeppelin and remain four weeks in the land of the Stars and Stripes. It would have been much greater event than when my brother Henry visited my friend, Teddy, when he all ready. l would have reviewed the American fleet in an admirars uniform and in the silver helmet of the guarde would have dedicated q monument designed by myself to my ancestor Friederich the Great.
 His Uniforms
 "In the eastern states l would have worn a dinner jacket or business suit but In the west would have af- fected the costume of an old gold digger or a modern farmer 1 would have affected the soldiers on Fifth avenue in tho purple cloak of tho Order of tho Black Eagle and in Wall street would have appeared in court hunting uniform. In Washington would have appeared as . general fold marshal with full decorations. would have received every delegs- ton In tho uniform of the country of thoir origin and would have dis that Americans at last would have realized wherein the proper charm and aim of life Hos. ws should have heard no more hereafter about democracy and such oiishnsns,
 "I had still greater pians to ieo- ture In Carnegie hall on the Bible anl the North German leHend and the relationship of the big Bertha'A to both, would have leotured in tho Metropolitan museum on my arohas- logical diseoveries In Corfu, would have told Americans how to alleviate cold in Alaska and heat tn Florida. how to make the Panama canal as advantageous as the NioaFa auguan routei how to convert the grapefruit into foodI rammany into the temple of the Holy Grail, The negro, Jap aHsse and Chinese problems would have been solved by nae ia the twink ling of an eye and good and willing servants instantly would have been found for the new world queens"