Little Falls herald. [volume] (Little Falls, Morrison County, Minn.) 1889-1950, 1922-04-14
FRIDAY, APRIL Ia, 1922.
UNCLE DUDLEY's COLUMN

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UNCLE DUDLEY'S COLUMN
We make rapid strides in this coun-
try, and as soon as one stride is COM
pleta start off on another.
A year or two ago the aeroplane was
the whole thing. Now it, is but an in
cident in our daily life. 1t has ceased
to thrill. a ~
The all absorbing topic today is the
radiophone, the latest wireless inven-
ton.
You know all about ,it--how you
place an instrument in the house, stick
receiver up in the top Of tree,
and then sit back and listen to market
reports or a concert being given a
thousand miles away. You may even
dance to the latest popular pieces if
you desire, or you can listen to ser
mon instead Of going to church.
:, Even the officials Of the University
of Wisconsin have got the bug, and
arc arranging to educate the public by
wireless.
It's great stunt. What will the
next one bee
A banker sued his wife for divorce
because she spent $500 a year for cos
metics.
IF she hadn't used the cosmetics to
make herself beautiful, he probably
would have tired of her sooner than
he did. In any event, it is generally
the woman who loses when marital
troubles creep in.
~ When man becomes bald headed
and dignifed he can discard his aging
"chicken,' one who does not require
cosmetics to put the bloom on her
rounded cheeks.
But not so the woman. When age
overtakes her, she must travel along
with others who have passed the mer1-
dian Of life. There are no young
bucks available for the woman who
has lost her charm.
3 3 =
Some people mean well, but never
do well.
They are always intending to do
something that never gets done. =
Instead Of taking just pride in &C.
complishment, they are continually
Inundated by the inadequacy Of their
excuses. -
They do not even drift with the tide
of humanity, but are simply switched
into the eddies Of life.
For them there is beginning, and
an end, but nothing in between.
They have neither true friends nor
bitter enemies, because they do moth
ing to inspire either friendship or en-
nifty. 49,.
They are nameless, because no one
is sufficiently interested to name them.
They iye-but only the Lord knows
why.
The anti-tobacco campaign in Chica-
60 has hit the rocks. An alderman
introduced a resolution in the city
council making it unlawful for women
to smoke in public and femininity I'M
mediately exploded in a burst Of pro-
test against such an unjust curtailment
of their liberties. It worked.
The government explains that the
bird On the new peace dollar is an
eagle. We are hankering to make it's
acquaintance.
This radio stuff is great stuff, any
way. It is only a question of time
when we will be able to pick up our
receiver and hear the president order
his soft boiled eggs for breakfass.
And I'VE might, per chance, even hear
him cuss the chef when they are over
done.
Many fellow puts diamond ring
81 a girls finger during courtship and
a washtub in front of her after mar
rage.
a.Rea Asaded girls Of the country are
up IN arms because Boston critic
claims they all have crooked legs
We're from Missouri.
Help yourself by helping others who
are willing to help you:
The most remarkable thing about
an election is the, rapidity with which
We forget the rottenness that crops
out.
Regardless of the fact that we have
q republican form Of government, we
are the most democratic nation on the
face of the globe. =
@-
There is, however, one way to check
the divorce evil in this country. Fire
all Of the judges. y
Keep moving forward. Everything
y. behind has been picked clean.
Life is full of joy to those who are
willing to forget their sorrows. 1880: 49,.
H. 9 q q >; A.,
Some people claim that cur prohibi-
ton law will keep us out Of war. No
foreigner would ever risk guiding our
booze. ~ -, =. \ ~. Is
The most exciting moment in climb
ing the ladder of fortune is when it
begins to break. r.
The fellow who talks of himself
seldom finds an opportunity to talk.
= = &
There is time and "a place for
everything, even to the paying Of the
editor. 4 q. :;
Another disappointment. Skirts are
getting into the price class and are
coming down.
5s8 Say 1T with dollars. We like to
/ hear you talk. Il. .,1lfs
Harry Phillips, who has been ably
conducting the Mahnomen Pioneer for
q number Of years, has bought out his
competitor, The Free Press, sand has
5cffIlanliflafed the sl1hscrintiOn list: with