Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1922-01-04

clerk.
81 noticed your sign Say 1t With
Flowers out in front and thought I'd
give you trial order" he said.
well, we have roses. carnations
hyacinths and most anything you de-
sire. Now what"
Nothing like it, growled UT
"What l want is couple O. dozen
skunk eabbages to send my land.
lord. He's raised my rent again"
If L. C. Boyle should change his oc.
cupation do you suppose he would sell
Hay.
All the world loves a lover but
laughs behind his back.
X X X X
How Much
A Lacrosse man was fined $50 for
calling a woman a Chicken" Abra-
ham Jerusalem Beat rises to ask "How
much would it have cost him had he
use dthe term 'old HEMP"
X X X
We can only hope that Mars does
not send its messages collect" We
have enough unusual expense now.
w ny uOtS hSN hdETlS LOOK ike ITSS-
ident Wilson?
A Michigan man has died from
drinking anti-freeZe mixture. Prob
ably he couldn't afford to buy coal
this spring.
Is it any wonder that our stock and
corn Judging teams win such high
honors when there is so much Power
in their instruction.
Many man finds that his auto
mobile is getting so fast that it keeps
two weeks ahead of his salary.
X x n X
Hardwareman Sam Sauer says some
how or other the handle of lawn
mower is always too short for father
but is just the right length for mother.
X X X X
Clerk of Court A. ID. Helgeson says
marriages begin in counting and end
in court.
Pleasant week to everybody, in a
nice bright world.-Arthur Brisbane.
X X X X
We don't know whether there is
any joke in this or not, but it certain
ly is peculiar that all of the proprie-
tors and employees of the Viroqua
Meat Co. live on the same street
and within three blocks of each other
And may your back yard produce a
bumper dandelion crop, say we.
X T. X
A Detroit man has invented a tire
which runs without air. He may
think it's something new. But we've
got four of them.
X X X X
Detachable eyelashes for women are
said to be coming into style.
Grover Farr says something else to
mislay.
Grant is Dewitt Of de town.
X X X X
Vampire Stuff
She pulled his ears and tweeked his
nose,
And sat upon his lap.
And rumpled up his Sunday clothes
He didn't care rap.
She rubbed her cheek upon his cheek
And smoothed his handsome locks,
The while he sat, quite calm and meek,
And fastened up her socks.
She did some things that were quite
My gosh, that girl was bold
But still she couldn't fuss her dad
She was but two years odd
X X 4 x
Wonder if our City Superintendent
L. w. is any relation to the man who
invented the steamship.
Greetings folks! Have you finished
paying for last years Christmas pres
ents yet?
X X
According to figures, performing
under the expert hand of Joseph st.
Mccoy, government actuary. il Me-
thuselah had invested 81 at 6 per cent
compounded annually, when he was 81
years of age, his wealth would have
amounted to $977, I57 900, 900 600 co.
600, 900, at the age of 9S9, when he
died.
Looking at Wilbur Smith certainly
does make Gena Sterry.
The turkey crop is the largest in
ten years, and the price has been
boosted. Whatever happens or fails
to happen, the consumer knows well
where he gets off.
II your setting or goose eggs failed
to hatch, would it be sign that you
didn't have the propaganda? Think
of the eastern accent when you pro-
nounce that last word and you win
get it,
\ X X 4
The Home Brewer Sings
Twinkle, Twinkle, little jar, how I
wonder what you are"
X X X X
Selling hardware is a hard business.
That's what makes Sam Sauer.
X y X x
How to beat the postoffice depart
nent: Address and mail a letter to
yourself without postage. It win be
returned to you.
If F. M. Towner would leave his bed
room window open would that make
his stationary
We understand that Clyde il sup
porting two OF three foster children
out at his home
The New West
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