davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The patriot. (Glenmora, La.) 1918-1955, 1922-04-07
Three Generations of Holmes Family

In the year 1853. the year that the
treaty of Paris ended the French and
Indian war. also the year of the i'm
portation act, which stirred the first
real spirit of colonial revolt against
Great Britain, Abel Holmes was born
in Woodstock, Conn. He was gradu-
ated from Yale in 1888 and was for
forty years pastor of the First church
Of Cambridge, Mass. He died in 1897,
aged seventy-four. His son, Oliver
Wendell Holmes. the poet, was born
in 1909 and died in 1894, aged eighty
five.
His grandson, Oliver Wendell
Holmes (portrait herewith), born
March s, 1841, celebrated the other
day his eighty-frst birthday by doing
n good square days work on the
bench of the Supreme court of the
United States. Thus three lives OF
cultivated gentlemen span the period
between the historic year 1853 and
1922. We may well doubt whether
The patriot. (Glenmora, La.) 1918-1955, 1922-04-07

the Vlcer0yaty deliberate
'' vi uhe cabinet by
oagu action particularly ill weakened Engand
a the Near East
persuade France to modify its Turk policy thus making possible
or the
dependency
than
Iod Derby asked become de
clhed This made the situation complicated
The patriot. (Glenmora, La.) 1918-1955, 1922-04-07
YOU CANNOT AFFORD

To let your little hurts and all
ments get bad.
Keep Vacher-Balm handy for Burns,
BOils, Cuts, COrns, Piles, or Soreness
anywhere.
Ask your druggist. Avoid limitations.
Advertisement.
The patriot. (Glenmora, La.) 1918-1955, 1922-04-07
SHE DYED A SWEATER,
SKIRT AND CHILD'S COAT
WITH DIAMOND DYES"

Each package of Diamond DYES" con-
taIns directions SO simple any woman can
dye or tint her worn, shabby dresses,
skirts, waists, coats, stockings, sweaters
coverings. draperies, hangings, everything.
even If she has never dyed before. Buy
Diamond Dyes no other kind-then
perfect home dyeing is sure because Dia-
mond Dyes are guaranteed not to sDot.
fade, streak, or run. Tell your druggist
whether the material you wish to dive is
wool or silk, or whether it is linen. cotton
or mixed Observation-Disclosures.
The patriot. (Glenmora, La.) 1918-1955, 1922-04-07


o, Is the feeling regarding the British Empire? On the
whole friendly and among many important SECTIONS " inc community AZ
fectonate
The patriot. (Glenmora, La.) 1918-1955, 1922-04-07
Don't Forget cuticura TaIcum

When adding to your toilet requisites.
An exquisite face, skin, baby and dust
ing powder and perfume, rendering
other perfumes superfluous. You may
rely on it because one of the Cuticura
Trio (SOap, Ointment and Talcum).
25c each ere.-Advertisement
The patriot. (Glenmora, La.) 1918-1955, 1922-04-07

Miss Donaldina Cameron Is Scotch,
and therefore not much given to con-
versatfon; So the world seldom hears
of what she has done and seldom sees
her name In the papers. But in the
past twenty-seven years, working
quietly and efficiently, she has res
cued 1900 Chinese slave girls from
Oriental sections OF. Pacific coast
cities.
The patriot. (Glenmora, La.) 1918-1955, 1922-04-07


for t make
TO be he will probably
writing
The patriot. (Glenmora, La.) 1918-1955, 1922-04-07

this record of longevity has been broken
O choppers
the philosophy
of
The patriot. (Glenmora, La.) 1918-1955, 1922-04-07

Practice makes perfect-and it often
makes the neighbors feel like smash
ing the piano.
The patriot. (Glenmora, La.) 1918-1955, 1922-04-07
Increase Your Weight to
Normal by
Taking
TAN LAC
The Worlds Greatest Tonic
And Start Right Away.

This is not advice. 1t is just
mans bunch. If you want to feel good
from the bottom Of your feet to the
top Of your head, cut out the things
you know you ought to.
The patriot. (Glenmora, La.) 1918-1955, 1922-04-07

Some wolves don't even take the
trouble to disguise themselves in
Sleeps clothing
The Washington times., 1922-08-06
The National Daily

ton for mef haven't got any yellow diamonds Of any
kind. You gave onecandle power engagement ring,
with in that looked like fleas eye Then you
pawned that to buy me my wedding ring and had to
sell that to 60 honeymoon In fact, think pawn
ticket is my marriage certificate"
Pop would say "Why remind me of my early mistakes3
amt rich that think the United States Treasury
poorbox.
"I work every day. don't II Look at them hands,
stained by free lunch and honest to Nom would
"You amt claiming that marriage is failure,
youi' @<
Pop would scratch his head to think His family
Europe the largest dandu manufacturers in France
Pop would tell MON, 'No don't think it's a failure
because some failures pay cents the dollar
Nom would say, "You couldn't Z pay cents on a soda
cracker If it wasn't for where would you bel" Pop
would get expression his face like pane Of glass in
hospital window and start scratching his bald head again
Then he would say "Im going down the corner and
kill the evening" Nom always told him that he ought
keep away from those buns down in the saloon
and if he wanted to kill evening" they would call on the
Whimpes.
Pop told her that he wanted kill the evening not
to torture it.
The Washington times., 1922-08-06
THE FAMILY ALBUM

both Of girls suffered and the cat threw fits When
the Whmps gathered around the paror lamp for quiet
evening home folks thought that the cornerstone OF
their house q rocking chair.
Mr. Whimpe would shiver. His wife would start
making imaginary gestures like she knitting socks for
theoretical soldiers The two girls would commence some
suffering songs and the cat would start contributing
fits with lavish hand. w.
Minnie the youngest girl perfect Greek type. She
worked In Ninth street restaurants ...'
Her sister Lolly, brunette by BIRTH but blonde
by habit She awful heartbreaker and loved diamond
engagement rings She had many rings her fingers
that she developed muscles in her thumbs She
bracelets that her looked like cane full of
doughnuts.
None of her diamonds really good They were off
color and pop used say that Loys fingers reminded
him of Government reservation.
Nom who had very nquisitive mind during normal
rates of exchange would ask him what he meant What
Government reservation looked like Lolys handful Of
diamondsf
And pop would say Yellowstone Park.
Nom would say, "That reminds me- how about vaca-
The Washington times., 1922-08-06
THE PICTURE CHASER

sacred as the search Of Sir Gala
had, and as patriotic as the mid.
night ride Of Paul Revere.
An all-night vigil, q fight m
the dark. . BIT of second-story
work. or pfain, straightforward
banditry-any combination OF
these strategfes may be resorted
to in difficult cases. For, It IL
readily seen, the moro difficult to
get, the more valuable the pic
ture. Regardless Of the frame-up
get UP or hold-up, there must be
art" with stories. Which you
see. gives birth to the first and
only rule Of picture chasing
Don't come back without It"
With this in mind. then, you
should find interest In the glor-
ious failure of one Bert Field,
"pic" hunter extraordinary.
Field had a reputation for COM
ing back with the picture. True,
he occasionally flivvered, but his
average was so above reproach
that among the members Of the
other picture chasing fleets ct
the city, It was more or less the
accepted viewpoint that 'if Field
can't get It. there isn't any"
This enviable position was not
held through the flash success of
a cub, for Field had long since
forgotten when he first started in
the game.
His notable faiiurs-et least Get
down by the city editor 40 Q
The Washington times., 1922-08-06
l. PERFORMER AND BUZZING BLONDINE

She tried to model herself on
the lines Of q string Bean. slight
ly warped by the Sun.
The Ascending Star Of the FL
nancial World was stunned By
the Apparition.
= No one tipped It off to him
that the Queen Of .sheba was to
be reincarnated.
He liked to tow something that
would cause the Oyster Forks to
pause In midair and the Catty
Ones to reach for their Hard
ware.
THE SWITCHES OF DESTINY.
When Elphys did . little Bar
mum and Bailey down tho main
Chute Of q Terrapin Bazaar. rest
assured that every Eye in the
Resort was aimed at her sleam-
ing vertebras.
Bob showed her his monthly
Statements and she confessed to
being very fond Of him. So II
was planned that they would
Marry some afternoon. II she
could get away from the Mas
seuse early enough.
Just when II seemed . mortal
Pipe that the Bull tactics would
enable him to cop . Million. 80
that he could finance the Little
Queen. the Unseen superintend-
ent In the Tower began to throw
the Switches Of Destiny.
II Bob had not speeded 30 far
into the Country there would
have been no Fiat Tire
II there had been no Fiat Tirs,
he would have been back IN time
for the usual roundup Of the Ir-
rigstion Committee and never
would have been . Great r.
nancier.
Marooned among ths Hay
Fields. he stopped at a Farm
House and took q long chance
on some weu-wster. dipped in a
Gourd from the Moss Covered
Bucket
Scotch whisky. even the ersatz
kind. Ia mover contaminated by
Surface Drains. but each spar
king Drop Of the Fluid that Bob
quaffed. there beneath the Will
lows, contained moro than 2.oo0,-
900 Of the Germs made notorious
by DR.. Woods Hutchinson.
A few days later q swarm of Bees
settled In each ear. Every Sky
scraper gave an imitation Of the
leaning Tower Of Pisa
The Washington times., 1922-08-06
By CLIFF MEREDITH

seem to remember that particular
visit to sullivan's.
I'VE started kidding Field about
II, but his only comeback was.
Maybe you're rishtr and he'd get
. sort Of long-distance look In his
eyes.
That was the end Of the Incl.
dent, except that one weekend
Field disappeared for three days.
When he landed back at the office,
he passed around some kodak
shots taken up at Atlantic City.
""who's the girlr We asked
him. That, gents he says, point.
ing to the pictures, Is Mrs. Bert
Field. Not q pretty name, but an
extremely pretty face. Up to Sat
urday her name was Molly Reed
you may remember the Mooney
Theater fire. The pictures aren't
very good-not half a. good q like.
ness as an old one I've got here
With that he pulled from his
pocket a small cabinet portrait
whose edges were bent with wear.
Some of us thought he'd had II for
some time.
To the present day there con-
tinues to be some doubt as to
whether Field actually failed, and
the accounts, therefore. differ.
But the boys who have seen Field
work still claim he is a good photo
chaser and rarely comes back
without the picture,
The Washington times., 1922-08-06

'-fliv." came on the occasion Of
the Mooney Theater fire- When
an explosion in the projection
booth Of the theater threw the
audience into = panic. fivs peo-
pie were killed IN the rush for
exits. A certain Molly Reed.
ticket seller. happened to keep
cool long enough to send In an
alarm, thertNy perhaps saving q
few lives. and by that. automatic
ally becoming an ideal page one
picture subject.
ITO the present day, however.
there continues to be some doubt
whether Field actually failed
in his chase. and the accounts
therefore differ. Perhaps you
should hear Fields own version
Of what happened:
when I landed on the scene
just ahead Of the fiiem.n, I flashed
the. Office and went to work.
Roberts, the camera man. shot
UP BY the boss, Joined me q few
minutes later. and together We
cleaned up on the general stuff.
About an hour later. after Rob.
erts had gone back with his
plates. I stared on the trail Of the
girl who flashed the fireboard.
Il located her In q sscond.rats
hotsi up the street. In . tiny
poorly Furnished two-by-four On
The Washington times., 1922-08-06

Mr.. jackson thought he could sit
in his Front Room and read the
bursiarious Meditations Of the
High-Bindsrs in Wall Street.
Consequently. when the Tin Box
was searched. the Day after the
Masons had marched out to the
Cemetery, Il contained . little Of
everything except Assets.
Annie was the name Of the
Daughter.
On the Cleanup she received
enough to put her through the
School.
When Bob arrived at the Hos
pital. in q State Of Conflasration,
Annie was waiting IN the stsrchsd
Uniform to tackle her first real
Case
For days and nights he rambled
through the shostly fabyrtnths Of
Delirtum, Annie holding him by the
Hand and lifting the cool Draushts
to his parched Lips.
But his sub-oonscious Self was 20
oonsiderats Of Elphys that he never
brought In her Name at all. at all.
Through the final Crisis he
played tag with the Grim Reaper
and Just escaped bsing II
The Sun was slantins into the
little white Room whsn he orawled
feebly back to Earth and tried to
get his Bearinss,
Annie was looking right At him.
relieved and smiling and happy.
She had won her frst game in the
Big League
He noticed that she was In. no
way concealed behind the usual
pallid 'venserins.
He remembersd dimly that she
had been with him ON me Under.
ground
Thsn he recalled . previous
Existence in which the Dripped
Absinthe was . Breakfast and
the Cigarette q Luncheon and
Elphye was trottins in her
Glads and he had q Swell Pat
down on Tin Bucket Preferred.
The whole Layout seemed un-
real and remote and entirely dis.
connected with Friend Nurse.
He inquired the Day Of the
Week. and when he learned It
was Next Month he started to
get right up and put on his
Things.
Annie quietly spread him back
On the Pillow and Laid down the
Law regarding Rest and Quiet.
The Washington times., 1922-08-06

into the water cooler and flooded
the main deck.
The picture was crumpied and
torn In the scuffle By the time
the clerk and proprietor pulled US
apart, and Q few minutes later
they had me riding in the wagon
"of course Tim Fogarty, Cum
ningham. and Joe Gear were on
the wagon and when we got
down to Dan sullivan's we stopped
near the family entrance and had
q glass Of beer all around. They
gave me the laugh right, but that's
AZ far a. I went with them a.
escorts. The picture, matss-well,
you don't see It, do your"
Not very remarkable, these de-
tails Of Fields glorious failure, and
yet in q manner significant.
For the final chapter, you
should now hear what Caswell,
the assistant city editor, had 70
say of tho matter:
THAT was the story Field told
the boss when he came back with
out the picture. Around the shop
1t stood UP very well in the excite
ment Of the moment. but as the
weeks passed by, there sprans UP
. certain suspicion that this yarn
Of q stairway battle was largely
the bunk. You see, one Of the
boys happened to chat with Tim
FoEarty. and Fogarty couldn't
The Washington times., 1922-08-06
Bv GEORGE AIDE

Then he begged her to ring up
MoCusick q 90. and get the
latest Bucket Preferred.
He said he had plastered his
last Simoleon and, not being
there to watch the Board and
concentrate his wonderful Trad
ing Instinct on every tisgie Of
the Dial. there was no telling
what the Bone-Heads had done
to him.
ELPHYE MAKES GETAWAY.
You see, he had no recollection
whatever OF going Short, for he
had been in Q Walking Delirium
at the time and crazy as q
Cubist.
Annie said II was wrong to
Gamble and he was not to read
the Papers or fuss with Visitors
until Doc gave the word.
Suddenly he remembered that
he was engaged to Eiphye and
he wondered II she had forgotten.
So many things can happen In a
Great City within two weeks.
He told Nurse about Elphye.
Annie did not seem madly In
terested. but she wrote a Note to
the Sakerack Apartment Building
and notified the Seraphine that her
prospective Producer was still ex-
tant and would be willing to renew
acquaintance II she could spare
an hour or two from her Dancing.
Elphye came out two days later
made up as q Princess IN the
Christmas Pantomime and diff
fusing pleasant odors in all direc-
tons.
Bob suddenly realized that in get.
ting rid Of the Bronxes and the
Nicotine and various other Toxins,
he also had lost his appetite for
Elphye.
But he was Game ana willing to
go through on his own Proposition.
He begged his Fiancee to snug
gle in q Newspaper so he could find
out the name Of his getting-off Sta
ton.
Next day she brought the Market
Page In her wonderful jewel-orusted
Bag.
Bob took one Look and crawled
under the Covers.
The Market had gone Blooey.
Bucket Preferred was down in
the Subway, bleeding from o dozen
Wounds.
Courage, Dearie." said Bob.
taking Elphys by the Rings. Your
The Washington times., 1922-08-06
Elphys Game in Made Up As Princess.

He knew he was out Of Kelter.
but he had to watch the Board, for
he had put every Bean in the
World on an acrobatic Industrial
known as Tin Bucket Preferred.
Already the Paper Profits were
enormous. Bob figured confidently
on another whoop Of 80 points and
. double string Of Pearls for
Elphye.
But when the poor Loon had a
Temperature Of above Par and
had to cling to the Brass Rail to
keep from taking the Count, he
lost his Nerve entirely.
He couldn't see anything on The
Horizon except Tariff Revision,
Hard Times, Weeping Women.
The Washington times., 1922-08-06

IN the newspaper shops along
the street Of adventure. there
- goes . chase that started
whom inventive minds first created
. East process for reproducing pio-
lures alongside Of typs.
The chase stu goes on. It Is
unending. It is the chase Of the
picture hounds-reporters who
hunt down photographs Of people
In the news.
Coming back with the picture"
means delivering into the hands
of the engraving room foreman
the photograph, mug, map, shot,
or likeness of a person whose re-
cent actvities-whether crochet
ing, or carving-has suddenly
showed him or her into the pub
lie eye.
II nds COEho U pc a. HcWspdpoE
tradition test of cleverness,
tact. perseverance. and all round
reporting-this coming back with
the picture" No matter what
hurdle may be put In the path OF
photo-chasing reporters by people
who do not want their picture in
the paper" there is always some
body ready. willing and capable Of
making the jump.
Picture chasing is a mission,
sometimes gay, more often grave,
looked upon by portrait crusaders
as a heaven-sworn duty. quite as
The Washington times., 1922-08-06

little Playmate is erased from the
map"
Blphye upset two Rolling Chairs
and one Interne getting from the
Convalescent Department TO the
open Air. .......
Annie found the poor Bankrupt
much improved as TO Pulse and
Temperature.
He told her the whole Story Of
how his Lady Fair had canned
him because he was no longer a
Live One.
She held his hand and pushed
back his Locks and told him that
any Girl with q Heart would stick
closer than ever to her Selection
when he was under the Rollers.
Just then q Messenger from Nc
Cusick came in and showed Bob
that by going Short and standing
pat he was s1.soo.ooo to the Do
sirable.
After that, Bob was known up
and down the Street a. the Wiz
ard.
AnnabeIle, remembering how
they had got to her Father. made
him cut out the Margins and put
the whole Chunk into listed Securi'
ties and Real Estate.
He was 90 used to taking orders
from her as a Trained Nurse that
he cut out speculating and played
Safe.
The Missus allows him q light
one (mostly vermouth) before Din
ner each evening and has taught
him a private Signal which means
that she Ii ready to duck and go
Home.
At present they are in Paris,
where she is working to get the
same hilarious Tout Ensemble for
msrfy exhibited by Elphye, the
Ex.Empress Of the White Light
Reservation.
The latter went to see q Lawyer
when she learned that she had
been tricked out Of her Happiness.
Unfortunately for her, she had
nothing on Robert. thanks to his
native shrewdness and to Mr.. Bell,
who invented the telephone.
She 10 now playing Utility Parts
in . Stock Company In Pennsylva-
MIA. The Jewels peited at her by
Bob are much admired by the Gal
lery.'
MORAL: The city holds no
Peril for those who cherish Lucky
Ideals.
Copyright 1899. sy Bell syndio.s.. rne.
The Washington times., 1922-08-06

him, bearing as q Gift q Dream
Book.
A few weeks later they are cast
ing lots for his Union Suit.
ENTER ELPHYE:
Bob came from Simpville, but
he had acquired q couple Of Wrin-
kles associating with the Wing
Shots In the Paddock.
He could shift to either Foot
and he kept his MsxiIlary covered.
Sometimes he picked UP the
wrong Walnut. It would begin to
look like a quick change from
Caviar to Crackers.
Then he would smell around
until he discovered Something Do
ing. A couple Of lucky shots and
he would be on Velvet again and
whanging away like . Demon.
At last, with a Bull Market and
a system Of Pyramids, he began to
sweep It in with his Forearm.
He was admitted to full mem
bership in the Tribe Of the Night
RidersI
This select Coteris was organized
for the purpose of closing all
Cabarets by g A. M.
An early hour was named be-
oana. roanu - th.n. ,x.s. nat
made up for the cold Daylight
About this time he discovered
Elphye also.
She was an Actress who was
too busy to perform on the Stage.
Elphye had a good Social Po-
sition back at her Home but, for
some reason, she never sent
for It.
Her Parents had arranged for
her to be . Brunette. but when
Bob met her. between Guinea
Hen and the Cafe PartAit, she
was q Lemon Mertngue.
Elphye wore Clothes that made
a noise like O Piccolo.
She was there with the jeweled
Heels and the hand-painted
Ankles.
In trying to make her Gowns
anywhere from six to nins
months ahead Of Paris, she
sprung several Effects that
caused the Chandeliers TO tremble
and the Ice to melt In the
Buckets.
She had abolished her Shape
entirely and abandoned the Per-
pendicular. preferring . Droop
which indicated that possibly she
had been fashioned over . Barrel.
The Washington times., 1922-08-06

portrait Of the girl. proppsd up
against the SCARED mirror Of the
bureau. It looked irks an easy
job.
well. the s,ri listened to my
chatter and I soon had her COM
ing around nicely. She started the
usual 'well.I-guess-not' line. but
when I sprung the hero stuff. she
gradually melted and she finally
said o. X.
Then In butted swsetie. Not a
chance says he. No friend Of
mine 10 going to be trapped into
giving her picture to q reporter
'whadda you got TO do with
1.-THE lady says o. K..' says to
him. And I already had the pic
in my fist.
Plenty says he, and he steps
over q bit nearer, as though he
was gonna start something.
"wer. the chatter got pretty hot
but was lined UP pretty well with
the door. and when he got MIXED
up in the middle Of q speech I
busted for the han.
at the top Of the stairway he
landed on my neck, and we rolled
down the first flight locked in .
oiinch. The plunge down the next
flight into the lobby was . bit
rougher. We knocked out . few
spokes In the bannister. but the
main event cams whom We crashed
The Washington times., 1922-08-06

Starving Rddies. Closed Factories
Soup Kitchens. and Bread Lines.
While in this dotty State and
quite irresponsible, he directed the
Manager to close out the whole
Smear and sell short.
Furthermore, he was 20 daffy
and curdled in the Filbert that he
sold three times as much as he had.
Then he did q couple Of Spins
and q Flop, and the White
Ambulance bore him away to the
big Hospital.
II Mr.. Hornung jackson OF
Round Grove, Maryland. had not
entered upon his Second Child
hood at the age Of IS, his Family
would have kept on Essv Street