Omaha daily bee., 1922-04-30

VIII Journey with me. too
PHILOSOPHY.
Friendship is love without the sting.
Cupid may not be periee, marksman. bu, he
often makes hit with miss.
No matter how modest a man is he likes TO be
detected in the &C. OF doing good.
UNANIMOUS.
Wife; John. hate to be always asking you
| for money.
Hub: Not any worse than hate to have you.
| A shady past won't help much in the hot
weather that is yet to come.
! wish that fellow
Would 70 south.
Who keeps toothpick
In his mouth
Inherited wealth may be a drawback to per-
sonal achievement but ! trust this fact will not
influence any failing philanthropist from men,
,ioning my name In his last will and testament
l offered small bet on the Buffaloes to the
elevator man yesterday and he took me up.
SAD WoIDs.
OF all sad words of {. or p.
The saddest are these. you will agree.
Which make the green old world look gray.
THE home team lost the game today
DON'T CHEER. BOYS,
(They may be going down for the last time.)
Dear Philo: Here's department store melo-
drama:
Gracious heavensl Are we reduced to this7"
cried the smart Easter hats as the clerk ap-
preached with the revised price tags.
Myrt: The fresh thing said had the map OF
Ireland on my face.
Cert: Well, cheer up, kid. Maybe ireland
isn't as bad as it's painted
TODAY'S IDLE THOUGHT.
The reason some people do not get what is
coming to them in this world is because they
have the ability to dodge it.
WHAT'S THE USE?
A woman's logic. so they say,
OFT causes man much mental pain
She won't save for rainy day
Because she can't shop in the rain.
Some men will do anything for money-even
work.
To win success you have to get up before
breakfast and do little wooing.
When man tells you that further argument
is useless, it is pretty good sign that he can't
think of anything more to say.
Be sure you are wrong before you 60 back
and sit down.
"Man wants but little here below"
An old-time poet cried,
And that's the reason some We know
Are 90 self-satisfed
TWENTIETH CENTURY WONDERS.
Speaking OF marvellous feats Of memory Ito
say nothing of any other big feet) met man
when they started to put in the foundation OF the
Medical Arts building at Seventeenth and Dodge.
M. A. P.
THE HOPE CAR.
Dear Philo: noticed sign hanging on
fivver down on Harvey street recently, which
read: "This car for sale, or any part Of i"
Now this gave me an idea which pass out
free of charge to young men contemplating
matrimony, being fine example Of the free
service given to our readers BY this column.
The "hope chest" is an old and honored in
this piece Of fancy work now. and few en-
broidered doilies or initiated napkins little
later, packing all with loving care, why can not
the prospective groom be accumulating fvvef
piece by piece?
He can start out with fender or two now.
next pay day the rear axle, adding tires, steering
wheel, bolts, nuts etc, etc, as surplus funds
permit, and probably the engine out OF the an
nual bonus. =.
lust before the wedding day the last wheel is
nut on. and away we go with the hope chest in
the rear seat and room for more. Toot,to all
aboard. Is everybody happy? I'll say sol
M. A. P.
Dear Map: You uttered somewhat. It is with
feeling Of having accomplished something to-
ward the For-r-rd movement of mankind that
we re- pass on your timely suggestion to the inn
pressionabe male about to commit rnatrimony.
What is home without fvver? place you
have to stay at And how much more recherche,
SO to speak, to roll your own" than to wait
until after the nuptials and secure one on the
uneasy payment plan and wear it out dodglng