The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1922-06-12
KORP. KERR BUYS A FEED
At Dote's Resterranch On S. Main
Street-Wants No Regular Diet.
Dote Gets Stung.


Deer edditoral: is ritin now to give
you sum ekvise which will be Of
kumfurt to you if you promulgate
havin bizness deelins with a furni-
toor deeler. you know that had my
advertisement in yore paper bout
the dimes what i am servin on S.
name street at my nue. resterranch.
we'll, bin gittin good trade and
things WIS moovin long purity we'll
and wus bout to git reddy to revue
the profits when j runs inter hard
luck it wus this way. last fridy,
Korp. karr, whut you alters ritin
bout and who thunk must be man
of sum prommernits turnt up at the
resterranch fur a feed he sed. he
looked in the hash pot and then at
the kake and sed to NEE whut is the
price of rashuns. sed reglar DIN
ner wus fifty sints, but he sed he
wus not a reglar eeter and did not
want to maik a kontrack fur a.
reglar dinner, that he perfer-
red to pay so mutch and eet as his
appertite KUN to him, sayin that
sumtimes he paid and did not as
mutch as eet four woffies fur
breaclfust in butter with baking and
scrambled aigs, and sumtimes he
wus a purity good eeter, and flang in
quite lot. he sed agin three times
that he could not tell jist how mulch
he wood eet till he got started and
sed fur me to fix the price and he
wood begin. well went. in and talk
ed the matter over with lizzie, and
while she wus a little skittish bout
IT and sed that the best way wus to
pay as you eet that she wood risk
him fur seventy five sints. wusn't
zactly satterfed myself so goes
back and goes over the thing with
the Korpal agin, speshully askin if
he had ct emmy breckfust that
morning and how he felt long the
hungry line and he sed that he had
had his usule breckfust and did not
feel no moar hungry than common,
so put it at 8ty five and tole him to
talk a sect which he did. j noticed
that he did not talk cool drink of
ice water which gives EN- fust
to keep EN- frum gittin foundered
on hash and kake. he sed that his
docktar had sed fur him to drink no
ice water at dinner time. well the
hash wus brought in and he lit into
it and sooner than it takes TO tell
you bout it he done ct up the whole
dish lickt it out and wus calm for
moar, well had the price of wun
dinner and IS on a nuther so goes
in and brings in a nuther hash din
ner thinking that maybe we wood
make it up on the kake, and he
soon eet that up jist like it wus a
ripe apple and he wus a boy in the
kuntry in december what Incident
sed a apple fur bout six munts. he
sed that he never did eet with stitch
a cummin appertite, and that RELY
the hash wus the best he ever ct and
sed that he wood talk a little moar.
we'll lizzie begins to kick on that
and sed there wood be nun left fur
the chillun but oaver persuade her
to let him have the ballents of the
hash and sed that wood kook sum
fish fur the chillen and by that time
he he'd done ct up the ballents of the
hash and called me in to say that if
there were ennything he did relish
it wus fish. bout THAI time I sed that
j wus willin to be reesunable bout
ennything and that as didn't want
to be run out of the resterranch biz