New-York tribune., 1922-03-23

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PurIors Must Go.--Tribnne headline.
IP-H1p-HOORAY!
III think I'll die to-day.
Jolly undertakcrs, let my funeral be
gay;
Seven saxophoners must intone the
Dead March Rag;
Brighten every carriage with some
fireworks and flag;
Let the mourncrs hollcr: Gosh, 1t
might have been much worso!'
String some cheerful bunting on the
side walls OF the hearse.
Jazz the final tribute; let tho culogy
be snsppy;
Though I shan't enjoy it, keep the
other people happy.
If you find my widow has no qualms
about tho bill
Hold The ceremonies in some lobster
palace grill
Pardon, folks, ] pray,
But cannot help botray
Rigor mortis mcrrimcrt. think I'll
die today
IIo-dddyhi.
Pm sure I'm gonna die,
Summon The cmbalmcr with smuse-
mcnt in his eye.
Speed the srinning mourncrs TO the
Jolly cemetery:
Do your level best to keep the cortesc
bright and merry.
IF the weaker hearted have the signs
Of grief betrayed
Turn their minds to CHEEKY things and
give them each spade;
Shoot come Roman candles Off and let
the banners wavc;
Tell them funny stories as they work
to fill the grave.
Try TO kecp their minds away from
dissolution grim;
Shout, TO rouse their mcrrimcnt, ooh.
what joke on him,"
Hear my joyful cry,
AS the final moments Ny:
Balance to your partners, folks. I
think I'm gonna die"
"Ai@'s it nnlo@iaa'," says U7acle .4bios-
e'ech Boeordas, OF Preakn.ss, n. d.,
"whot triumph for both parties crery
Kcine election ts'9
We'd like to call the attention Of the
unnamed impresario who offered
Mayor Hylan $4,000 to the fact that
we're pretty funny oursclf, sometimes.
Nivienne, the Proto-Flapper
NlTicnne is the young woman Who
first appeared in public with her
ga!oshes unfastened. She recently at
tended a party with her dress un-
fastened Of course, there was some
unfavorable criticism, but Vivicnne is
not discouraged. She realizes that it
will take time before young woman
can appear with propriety and not
have single button buttoncd or
hook hooked. 4. p. FAXON.
If this trend toward the nude doesn't
stop soon some Flapper is going to
afront the public By displaying her
lace IN its natural state.
t'LlPPER-FLAPPER
The Fhpper and tie Flapper
We're scdlkfns IN tito park;
Said tho FHpper to tho Flappsr.
'Let's 90. IT'S getting darh."
Sad tie Fhppeg to The Fluop.y.
"WAy, ho,O quiet yoaa'ue bccoq0sm
Said tbs Flopper TO tho Flipper.
"Coms nlong. ri see goa home"
M. n. S.
Labor, in its more violent moments,
is so seldom logical. Striking fisher
men on the Jersey coast set fire to
town. They should have bs.led out
the ocean
DOMINION
My cabin window is q tiny square,
But it is open to the eastern sky.
And when night pales and, tremu !
lous and shy,
The dawn comes Ger the hilltons. !
ileSH ana Talr,
For me is marshaled davbreskx
pagcantry--~
The first faint flush,
The quivering shaft. Of light.
The slow withdrawal Of the routed
night,
And all the marvel of dawn's ar
tlstry.
My cabin porch is but messy stone !
Beside my doors low threshold to-
ward the west;
But when the day is done and I can
rest
The sunset glory, for my eyes alone.
Fills all my world with color and
with light.
Only cabin on a mountainside.
Simple and lowly; but the view is
wide
Horizon widc-from dawn to starry
night.