Evening journal., 1922-02-25
KEYSTONE HOT SHOTS
BY ono of the old Guards.

m this weather continues the
clubs baseball team will probably
be seen early on one OF the dia-
monds preparing for the coming sea-
son. Anyone desiring a trial should
get In touch with manager Ham
mer.
Cy Young the club premier poet
is getting set for a busy season. He
has already turned down quite a
few offers to turn professional and
assures his many friends that he
will stick 10 the amatuer ranks un-
I'll the blue birds wear suspenders.
John .Malonyz"My father IS so
hard that he GUS his nails with an
ak and cleans his teeth with file
Pete Devine-"That's nothin' my
dad shaves himself with a blow
torch"-Nexti
Mrs. Atkis says her son Clarence
Is Just like their furnace-all day he
smokes and at night he goes out
Very Brief by Brief
They never met but once
And they never met again
For she was a simple Jersey COW
And he a railroad train.
Allen-"What do you suppose that
man is doing on that electric pole?
Olen-"After fruit
Allen-"What kind OF fruit can he
get up there?
Olen-"Electric Currents"
All members are urged TO attend
the meeting at the club Sunday as
very important business will be
transacted and full attendance Is
desired. The meeting will start at
2.15 o'clock.
Charlie Hays has been eliminated
from taking part in pinochle games
with first class players. He had
the spurs dug into him deep the
other day and will probably start
playing dominoes for excitement
Bait Barns Is on recruiting SER
vice for the Army and Is stationed
IN town He was az the club re-
Gently and took Alphonso in tow,
but when Alophonos found out be
could not be a general az once he
decided to go back TO the sleep.
Heard around the freside-"what
became OF Vincents Jazz tie2
How many legs has a spider?
"Where did the term GIMME
originate?
How much does It cost Nathen?
where do we go from here?
Lets CO."
Those interested IN sports may
show their real worth with such op-
portunities as arc offered by the Ath-
lotic instructors at the club Two
nights n week will be devoted "a
those desiring 10 keep In the best
OF physical condition. For infor'
nation get in touch with Hacket OF
Elwood Buckmaster.
The club Is TO be congratulated on
electing n man OF Jack Morriss abil-
iiy as corresponding secretary. Al
though he Is but rookie he has the
experience OF a veteran and carries
the we'll wishes OF the members.
Battling Barnes one OF the haades
hitting ughtweishts ever developc
IN this state will soon be seen II
action az one OF the Philadelphis
clubs. Barnes Is working out dali,
at the club gym and keeps in IN,
best OF condition.
The next dance will be held II
German Hall next Friday evening
A surprise will be in store for thos'
who attend.
Mr. Edwardson ought to be yer!
n-rsical. He has a sharp tongue
a fat nose and natural voice.
Tommy says his girl uses lemoI
Juice for her complexion, but we sus
gest orange juice. IL might MAKE
her look sweeter.
A fellow was telling Jemms Jr
that prosperity has ruined a lot o
people. but II we've got to be ruin
ed we would like to have prosperity
do H.
Unsworth says married life Is al
right II you take II according to al
rections. He must have a httl
traffic officer IN his homo.
II large ears are a sign Of gener
osity--Happy ought 10 go to VOL
10 provide for the rest OF the gang
All il. favor give. the usual sign.
It's not the cough that carries 80,
of hut the coffin .;hey carry you Of
in-So watch your step.