The Washington times., 1922-07-23
David Hartman, Who Pushed His Way Into
Chambers Bath Room to Serve
/ 4a Tells of His Experiences and
the 10000 Unwilling Persons


Haggin dinner party.
Portrait of John B. Ireland the sign
below it read
"Oh you John B. Ireland said I, look
ing the portrait square in the eye. That
is speaking likeness. Now, dear friend,
you'll have a summons all your own for
the swiftness of that swift kick of your
doughty right foot
81 sued him, and in magistrates court
he paid me one hundred dollars damages
for assault and battery"
That was just one of many violences
which have come to Mr.. Hartman and his
partner, Mr.. Kaminsky, in return for their
zeal as representatives of parties ag-
grieved with the process served. In fact,
as both Messrs. Kaminsky and Hartman
point out, "If there's one thing in life
manor a woman-will fight shy of it's
process And if there's one person in life
they blame for the trouble process may
cause them, it's the impartial, Indifferent,
neutral, unoffending man who brings the
process to them. If it's wife, she blames
her husbands love for the other woman
and late arrival home nights all his married
life on the man who serves her the sum-
mons to appear in the divorce court.
'If it's landlord, he blames the
process server for the back rent due and
all the repairs a troublous tenant ever
caused him. But the process servers not
to blame. Now is he? That's why /
always try to reason a client out of such
nonsense.
"Once / had occasion to serve a process
on man at his own wedding. You see,
that man was a slippery duck. It's all
you could call him-slippery. | had fol-
lowed him all over the city until one night
| called at his bachelor apartment and
the grinning elevator boy explained.
"'Poor fella's being married tonight
That boy, you see, was a cynic on mar
riage. He told me where the bride lived.
So bought me pair of shoes, had them
done up all fancy in white paper and pink
ribbon, and then called on the man just
in time for the wedding reception. This
was at an apartment house way up on
One Hundred and Eightieth street.
Zone of the brides brothers grabbed
my hand and pushed me in, slapping me
kindly on the back. The brides mother
next took me up and showed me all the
presents, with hand half extended toward
my pink-ribboned shoe box. She was sure
that was a present, too.
"T'm awfully glad to see you,' said she
to me, in strong Yiddish. You make the
party complete. Any friend of my new
sons is friend of his mommer-in-law's.
She patted me warmly on the back.
"'Yes,' said to her, quite true. Now,
dear one, couldn't get just word with
the groom?
"'More than a word said she. Able
like
"She went away and brought him out.
edged him off into a corner. Oh, Pm
human. would never embarrass man
at his own wedding. l know, I've been
married myself-six months ago. Now,
Able said l, BE sport. Take it good,
Able. If it wasn't me it might be
homelier man; it's a summons, of course,
but if it wasn't to-day it might be to-
morrow, you'd get it. A honeymoon is
worse to interrupt. than wedding. &c.
Able, don't excite yourself! Here is the
simple little thing for bill of goods you
ordered but never paid for Now, Able,
don't take on!"
AS Dave Hartman, mastery technican,
diplomat, firm yet suave, process server of
New York City who goes out after results
and brings results back explained, he
mopped his brow in retroactive appre-
hension.
"Say," he continued, 'that bridegroom
might have beaten me up something awful
with all the wedding guests there to lend
him a hand. That wedding might have
been turned into row or a funeral
with me the leading character-and the
rabbi might have come in handy for my
last rites as well as the wedding vows.
But did he? Did he? All, no!
"Friend-lady-Abi took that process
like good sport, just as | advised him.
In fact, had not hardly finished with my
last words, take it right, Able, you're
only married once then he, too, slapped
me on the shoulder.
Right you are,' said he, but once is
enough to be married. Come, drink to
my lovely bride, and just tell me the
brand of cigar you smoke and I'll go
bring you! out one. No, I'll bring you out
a couple
"Now, that's what call handsome
Also of aHor+ anJ t;p,a IT,.