Cheraw chronicle. [volume] (Cheraw, S.C.) 1896-2005, 1922-03-30
THE COLORED BROTHER
OR
THE CREATORS MASTERPIECE

extracts from an article written by
s. r. Davis, of Indianola, Miss, on the
negro, whom he regards as the
Creators masterpiece" That the
writer is thoroughly familiar with
his subject Is shown by the interest
ing, amusing and truthful manner IN
which he handles it:
"The negro can lie down beneath
the scorching rays Of monday sun
and sleep the sleep Of the seven sleep
ers of old without suffering any evil
effects from 1t whatever; or he can
weather the fercest winter gale, clad
only in a pair of cotton overalls and
q blue jumper. He can also wear an
overcoat to a Fourth OF July celebra-
ton, or a pair of linen pants and an
alpaca coat to a Christmas tree and
be perfectely comfortable. And,
strange as it may seem, anybody S
clothes will fit him and look nice on
him. There is nothing else like him
under the sun. He sees all things,
hears all things, believes all things,
and has implicit faith in everything
he sees or hears and stands ready at
all times to step aboard Of anything
that comes along, from young mule
to a flying machine.
Wireless telegraphy is nothing new
to him; he has used 1t for ages: every
negro's mouth is a transmitter and
every ear a receiver. If anything Of
importance happens on plantation
tonight, every negro for forty miles
around will know it by morning.
Saturday is his special day by GUS
tom and common consent, and if you
have any business to attend to in a
delta town on Saturday, attend to it
early and get off the streets before
you get hurt. A negro cannot see you
Saturday unless you owe him some
thing, and if you get in his way ne
is liable to step on you, sit down on
you, or back you UP against a brick
wall and smother you to death. he
does not usually do these things, or
any of them, through any evil design,
al many sometimes suppose, but he
simply cannot help it if you get in his
way, for he is busy and cannot look
out for you. Saturday is his Fashions
and news exchange day, and in addi-
ton to having all those things on his
mind, he has to shake hands with
every other negro in town and hug
every negro woman he meets. You
had better take out an accident policy
or get off the streets Saturday.
"The Standard Fashions for negro
is a peck of cornmeal, two pounds of
sugar, one pound of coffee, three
pounds of salt meat and one gallon Of
black molasses week, but he can
consume all of this at one sitting if
necessary, of II he is working for you
and boarding himself he can live a
week on three soda crackers, a box
of sardines and five cents worth of
cheese. In other words, his stomach
is built on the same general plan OF
an old-fashioned accordion, and either
contracts or expands according to the
pressure brought to bear upon it.
"He is also immune to nearly all
kinds of poisons, and can swallow
the most deadly drugs with impunity,
! remember of having negro work
ing for me one time who was having
chills and was suffering with severe
backaches. / got him a bottle of Chill
tonic to take and bottle OF liniment
TO rub his back with. The liniment
was labeled in box-car letters, Poi
son; For External Use Only and |
cautioned him about it when l gave
It TO him, but for three days and
nights, before found it out, he had
been rubbing his back with the chill
tonic and taking tablespoonful OF
the liniment three times a day before
each meal, with excellent results. On
another occasion / was sick and had
a negro to wait upon me, and the
doctor opened can Of antiphologis-
tine to make a plaster for my side,
and left the can on the kitchen table,
and when my negro went in to get
his supper he mistook it for a can OF
peanut butter and ate the whole Of it
without ever discovering his mistake.
He Is likewise a great admirer OF
art, and in nearly every negro's home
be II ever so humble, there hangs a
life-size crayon protrait of himself on
the wall right opposite the door
where YOU will be sure to see it as you
come in the door. The rest OF his
surplus money he usually spends for
entertainment, preferably an eXcur-
sion but anything else in motion will
do. I have frequently stood on the
street corner on a cold, cloudy winter
day and watched as many as fifty
negroes, who would not average 5t
cents each, and none of whom had on
clothes enough to flag fiat car, cling,
ing to a merry-go-round as it went
-, ,1 ro,,,d orindinp ont that