davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Albuquerque morning journal. [volume] (Albuquerque, N.M.) 1903-1926, 1922-09-14
TheFurs
Buy
For You

In buying furs it should be kept
in mind that unless you are one of
those rare persons, an expert in
judging skins, you must have con-
fidence in your fur dealer. Other
wise you take chances Of disap-
pointment and dissatisfaction. The
reason is obvious. Fur coats are
made usually of a considerable
number of small skins. The de-
pendable manufacturer is ex-
tremely careful in selecting the
skins to go into garment, so that
they may be perfectly matched.
The less conscientious manufac-
turer is likely to place inferior or
poorly matched skins where they
are least noticeable.
We have always been most care
full to buy furs only from the very
best manufacturers of fur gar
ments; those whose regulations
are so valuable as to insure the ut
most care in every garment they
produce. Thus we have always
secured, and have this season furs
of an integrity that is beyond
question.
Albuquerque morning journal. [volume] (Albuquerque, N.M.) 1903-1926, 1922-09-14
Illus
tratiing
Savings

We buy fur coats and wraps, just
as we buy ready-to-wear garments,
with the purpose of giving most in
value for the smallest possible mar
gin of profit. In marking the sea-
sons fur stocks we have priced
furs of the highest quality about
equal to those charged in many
places for the inferior grades of
furs.
We have found that the market
for fur garments may be material
ly increased by eliminating the
large profit which most retail deal
ers appear to regard as proper to
charge for a fur coat or wrap
simply because it is fur. Thus by
increasing the volume of sales, at
very narrow margin of profit, we
find ourselves quite as we'll repaid
as for very few sales at an ex-
orbitant profit, and we have the
satisfaction and the asset of salts.
fled customers. In furs as in
everything else the Rosenwald
policy of volume sales at reduced
margins of profit is of benefit to
us and to our patrons.
Albuquerque morning journal. [volume] (Albuquerque, N.M.) 1903-1926, 1922-09-14

Can you think of any more de-
sirable birthday, anniversary or
Christmas gift than a handsome
fur coat. Ours are within the
reach of all and offer a rare
opportunity for making such
gift.
Albuquerque morning journal. [volume] (Albuquerque, N.M.) 1903-1926, 1922-09-14

1t will be pleasure to show you
the line of fur coats, wraps and
pieces. An inspection is actual
ly the only way you can Judge
accurately as to the high values
we assure you are available.
Albuquerque morning journal. [volume] (Albuquerque, N.M.) 1903-1926, 1922-09-14

Hudson Bay seal coat with full
shawl collar of finest skunk, cuffs
matched Of the same skins; a
bargain at
The Washington times., 1922-05-21
COLUMBUS WAS WRONG.
ess Hoke, in Judge.)

(Joss Hoke, In JudgeO
The people Of the olden times de
clared the world was flat,
That IL you kept on walking
straight you'd learn the truth
of that.
They could give you many reasons
that would make you stop and
think:
They could tell you how the ocean
kept from falling Ger the brink.
Even had an explanation that ex-
planned the setting sun:
They could answer all your aues-
tions. yes, could answer every
Now in those olden days they had
none of our pleasure cars.
They hadn't started fig'rinE on an
aeroplane trip TO Marsi
They didn't have the wireless and
they had no telephonei
The Edison electric light to them
was still unknown:
Their only music was by mouth, in
those sad days of old,
They hadn't yet discovered ''hootoh"
or money made of gold.
You cannot name a pleasure that
they had in olden days.
Golf had not been discovered, so
they had no golfing craze:
Ger faces women wore a rag; the
soul kiss was unborn;
They hadn't been awakened by tho
mowers OF early morn:
They didn't have our "nigger golf,"
they had no poker game;
The widest parties that they threw
would now be far too tame.
They do not know what they have
missed by choosing to live
then,
For they declared the world was
flat and, say, IL must have
beenl
The Washington times., 1922-05-21
YOU CAN'T FOOL. ,EM.

He got in from the poker gamd
about 3 o'clock In the morning, lid
heard his wife move In bed. and
SO he sneaked over to the baby'd
cradle and began rocking 1t. After
letting him rock q good while shd
said:
"Is that you. old man7"
Yes, petty"
What are you doing thereT
Rocking the baby. she was
restless. / didn't want TO wake
you up, and SO got up and came
over here to rock her to sleep"
How long you been there"
About an hour"
well, come on to bed, for I've
had the baby in bed with me for
two hours" BRUNETTE.
The Washington times., 1922-05-21
SAGES ASKED TO ANSWER

Dear Bill: Sound the tocsini
To your tents, o, Israel! Call in
the philosophers, logicians, sages,
savants, biologists, psychologists,
authOrOpologists, mesmerists, hyp-
notists, spiritualists, clairvoyants,
sOrcerers, sOOthsayers, necrom-
ancers, magicians, Chaldeans, ETC.,
with which the old column
abounds to answer the following
cOnundrum:
How can you tell q cake-eater
from a flapper these days? They
are both shaved smooth. What
has become of the young man
with the big, bristling mustachiosf
Twenty-Five or thirty years ago
girl would not waste her eyesight
looking at a man who did not have
n big hair pillow on his upper lip.
She did not consider that he be-
longed TO the male gender. Now
they won't look at a man unless
his face Is as smooth as their
own. What Is the answer?
G. ii. MCCARTHY.
The Washington times., 1922-05-21
OUR FAMOUS MEDICINE.
TESTIMONIAL No. /.

Dear Doctor Bill: Your cele-
brated Heard and Seen has ntade
a netO man of me, and / t0ant to
tell tho ,oorld. / enclose my
photo Of hot0 / looked last fall
and hoO / look and feel nop, as
spring comes on. It's all due to
the G. o. c. mixture / haze been
taking once a day for the last
feiO months. / had heard about
it before, but paid no attention
to it. / wds grouchy, gloomy
and all nun dotDn. MY toife had
even begun reading the adver-
tisements Of funeral directors,
especially those Who conduct
bargain funerals. She didn't
1odnt the funeral to cost more
than $50 cash, If possible.
Then someone told me of your
Heard and Seen daily tonic,
taken every afternoon or eurly
The Washington times., 1922-05-21
WHAT'S THE USE
GOING TO PATAGONIA?

A Rkkered-up gent IN this land
Of the free-dnd-dry gets q. pision
Of q menagerie assortment in
ratnbo,o colors ranging from en-
ergetic cooties to four "poncho"
dragons and-they send him to
tho hoosegoW or the other nat
domicile! DoVn in Patagonia a
lot of scientists are running
around looking for O plesiosuurus
or some other tOdter beast that
pds Visualized through the
"moon-shine" doi1n therel
FrontN Page Pussyfoot and
Mr.. VolsteddU
C.. J. NJ.
The Washington times., 1922-05-21
r. E. LEES LOFTINESS.

OF ROBERT f. LEE, after Ap-
pOmattox, we read: Large sums
Of money were offered to him
only for the use of his name. In
his opinion 1t vRs dishonest to
lend his reputation for the pur.
pose of inducing his friends and
admirers 10 put their money into
a business over which he was to
have no control and In which he
had no experience"
Well, he was "just a gentle
man." Nowadays the "go-getter"
rules the roost.
FRED VETTER.
The Washington times., 1922-05-21
HERE'S A RIDDLE.

Dear Bill: Kindly have your
riddle experts to send you the
solution OF this one:
Two legs sat upon three legs
with one leg I'm his lap. In came
four legs, picked up one leg. Up
jumped two legs, picked mp three
legs, threw IL at four legs, and
made four legs bring one leg back.
ROCKVILLE NUT.
The Washington times., 1922-05-21
HIS MUG WANTED

HIS MUG WANTED.
There Is o man In our town,
We all call him Bill,
But what this fellow looks like
/ be a-wonderins still.
Is he taIl, or II he shortf
Is he fat or lean?
I'd like to know what he's like,
This friend we've never seen.
So won't you get your artist
To look you over keen,
And draw your little picture
To put In Heard and Seen.
LOUISE G.
The Washington times., 1922-05-21
A good front porch has saved
many a good girl from becoming
an old maid. /. M. g.

What does your husband like
for breakfast"
II haven't found out yet. We've
only been married ten years, and
he hasn't liked anything I've had
30 far" OIDONO.
The Washington times., 1922-05-21
A SHAMPOO MIXTURE.

A fool there was and he loved
his brew,
Even as you and !,
Said he with glee, "Ha, . new
recipe
I'll surely have to try"
So he got some hops,
And the rest Of the props.
And he started in to brew.
But the stuff got thick,
And it had no kick,
But It made . great shampoo.
j. A. T.
The Washington times., 1922-05-21

A stout woman tainted in the
Postotfics building and was caught
in the arms OF q frail youth. who
shrieked what shall dor" A.
humorou. bysta nder pointed to the
sign: Letter Drop"
JULES b.
The Washington times., 1922-05-21
DAD WAS A CROUCH.

DAD WAS A CROUCH.
THE party which was to have
been held at the home Of Miss
Myra Carmichael Saturday was
called off, which is the reason
II was not held. 1t would have
been held only Miss Carmi-
chael says her father objected,
saying he had to get up early
in the morning and did not
want to be kept awake half the
night by noise"
Carter Und.) Weekly Herald.
The Washington times., 1922-05-21
THE HELPING HAND.

I knew a bullfrog with tho gout,
He said he could not hop about;
SO I cut off his legs
And fitted cork pegs,
Now wasn't that helping him outf
LEE FOYLES RODGERS.
The Washington times., 1922-05-21
AT THE BALL GAME.

Angry Fan-Sit down. you cab
bage head. Where'd you come
from9
Clever Guy-I came from the
same patch you did, Bozo.
DUKE WAGNER.
PERSEVERING IN POETRY.
Now when I'm lying In my bed,
without paper or a piece OF lead,
What noble thoughts run through
my head.
cannot sleep for making rhymes.
And witty jokes at various times
Run through my dome, like chimes;
But when I try . wit 20 be,
Or write some beautiful poetry,
I find myself way mp a tree.
I cannot think Of word to rhyme.
And I fear my jokes are Q crime,
But still I keep on trying Ill the
MORRIS BURRos
The Washington times., 1922-05-21
THE MAN IN THE MOON.

(As seen through a maiden's rev
cries. Typewriter drawing b.
EMMA NJ. WEBER.)
The Washington times., 1922-05-21
A "two-faced man" Is gener-
ally open to conviction II the
other fellow Is a good two
fisted" one.
FRED VETTER.
LAW OF COMPENSATION.

In his essay, THE Law of Com
pensation," Emerson gave many
examples to prove that there IS
law of compensation. The Amer
lean Montaigne, were he living to-
day, could find in the racy Jokes
on prohibition another excellent
illustration in support OF his thesis
FRED SCHwAB.
THE GREATEST JOY.
Is there q Joy on earth,
Or cen heaven to WOO,
Like that which springs 10 sudden
birth,
When I kiss your
Methinks there Il, and now,
My point I think you'll see
It's when your eyes look into
mine,
And you kiss me!
Al BECKER.
The Washington times., 1922-05-21

vlaitor-How much milk does
that cow giveH
Sambo-Seben gallons.
Visitor-What's her namef
Sambo-JzZie.
Visitor-why don't you call her
Lizzie Volstead7
Sambo-You don't want dat COW
to go dry on me, does yo'7 @.
The Washington times., 1922-05-21
POOR CONSOLATION.

"Yes, my wife married me for my
money" he confided.
well, I'll say she earned It."
+. d. b.
The Washington times., 1922-05-21
PURE MATHEMATICS.

Some people virtually eat mathe-
matics-
They ought to have good Gig
ures" in all their subdivisions, we
Calculate" it.
Folks may sum" this up, but on
root" of IL. AL G. BRA(O proves
this. HANK HAWKINS.
The Washington times., 1922-05-21
CURBSTONE PHILOSOPHY.

1 never could understand hot
some stenographers can wear ne
suits almost every day while Il
wives Of the men they work 4
are compelled to make ono 81
last . season.
Next to staying up all night wild
the baby, there Is nothing gets d
q mans nerves quite rs much q
to have his wife tell him what
fine time she had at tho hen party
with no men around. /,
II. N. McC., Jr.
The Washington times., 1922-05-21

Pete-why did they make the
hand on the Statue of Liberty IL
inches long?
Lillian-I don't know.
Pete-If they had made II ~
inches II would have been a foot.
l.. d. B.
A NEVER-GIVE-UP CREED.
I'll not with the optimist remark,
BE bright and CHEEKY, though the
way be dark"
And I'll not with the fatalist say,
struggle not, tits useless, He has
prepared the way"
But this has always been my creed,
Onward strive-with thought and
deed"
MERCURY.
The Washington times., 1922-05-21
LONG-HAIRED MAIDEN'S
PRA YER.

Mother, Mother. bob my hair,
Cut IL off must anywhere,
Make IL short enough to suit,
Make your daughter look real cute,
just sweet seventeen, Oh! Mother dear,
And have never been kissed (but
near).
So bob my hair Just as I bid.
And make me look Just like q Kid,
Ill wear short socks and sandals, too,
just like the little kiddies do.
feel so young In mind and heart,
So dress me up to look the part.
Mother, Mother. get the shears.
Clip my hair Just meath the ears,
On my head q tin pail wedge,
Then cut my hair around the edge
From ear TO ear In one straight line,
Then I'll be happy, Mother mine,
ANONYMOUS.
The Washington times., 1922-05-21

Young man In drug store-1
would like some powder, please.
Clerk-Face, gun or bug7
Young man-Whicheve 10 most
suitable for my motherin-law.
JOHN R q
The Washington times., 1922-05-21

There may be just as good
fish In the sea as has ever
been caught, but that Is no
satisfaction to the man whose
bait Is all gone.
The Washington times., 1922-05-21
AN EARFUL FOR YOU,
MERCURY.

No use a-talking-cornfed
folks may act shocking and
seem green, but they are gen.
orally husky enough to hoe
their own row.
HANK HAWKINS.
The Washington times., 1922-05-21
HEEORE AAo AEIER-

evening, before or right after
meals. found that the cost
t0as only three cents daily, one
dose a day; less than that If de-
ivered at tho home every after
noon. From tho ftrst dose /
began to improve and you see tho
result. I can look an undertaken
in the face and bust right out
laughing. Before taking II and
S the most curious thoughts
about my funeral used to como
into my head every time I
passed an undertdker's establish
ment.
recommend II and S as tho
greatest Of all medicines, paLa-
table, delightful in effect.
JOHN BOATMAN,
Benedict, Md.
The Washington times., 1922-05-21

A headline in New York
newspaper says: "HOuse Plan
ming Bonus Sidestep." The
sidestep has long been the most
proficient dance they know on
the Hill. JULES B.
The Butler weekly times and the Bates County record. (Butler, Mo.) 1918-1950, 1922-11-02
Born to Mr.. and Mrs. Bert Egg
yleson Thursday night a girl.

Born to Mr.. and Mrs. Bert Egg
gleson Thursday night. a girl.
Mrs. E. C. Mulkey came down
from Kansas City the last of the
week for a visit at the home of
her motehr, Mrs. H. L. Clinken-
beard, on East Dakota street.
Mr.. and Mrs. Fred Glenn and
little son, Armand, of Kansas
City spent Sunday with Butler
relatives and friends.
Richard Hurt, one Of Butler s
early day BARRIERS, was down
from Kansas City Tuesday shak-
ing hands with his many Butler
friends and visiting with rela-
tives.
Parties who have motored to
Kansas City lately say that the
roads through Cass county are in
the worst condition for a long
time as dragging and upkeep Of
all kinds seems to have been dis
continued.
Every Republican candidate,
both on the state and county
tickets are endorsing the Hyde
administration and it's policies.
A vote for any one Of them is an
endorsement Of these policies.
Vote the straight Democratic
ticket from top to bottom.
The Erwin Brothers sale of
Duroc Jersey Spring gifts and
boars which was advertised to be
held Tuesday, October 31st, has
been postponed until November
9th, at which they will offer
some Of the best hogs Of their
herd and it will pay those who
want to improve their blood
strains to look over the offering
of the Erwin Brothers.
There's a Small matter when
some of our Subscribers have
Seemingly forgotten. TO u$ it is
nece$$ary in our bu$ine$$. We
are very modest and do not wish |
to Speak of it, but we know pos |
ltively that those $ub$criber$ of |
whom you are undoubtedly one,
who peru$e these few lines, will
not require over three gue$$e$ to
know what we in our difficult,
le$itating way, are So delicately
trying to imply.
The Butler weekly times and the Bates County record. (Butler, Mo.) 1918-1950, 1922-11-02
Mrs. L. r. Choate Dead.

Mrs. Leslie R. .Choate formerly
Miss Jessie Nix Of this city, died
at the Christian Hospital in Kan
sas City on Wednesday morning,
November !, at 2:30 o'clock,
after a several days illness.
She is survived by her hus-
band, her mother, Mrs. NJ. V.
Nix, a brother, W. j. Nix, and a
sister, Miss Linda Nix:
The body will be brought to
this city Thursday, on the II 20
train and will be taken to the
home Of DR.. and Mrs. j. w.
Choate on North Main street,
where funeral services will be
conducted on Friday afternoon at
2:3O o'clock. Burial will be
made in Oak Hill Cemetery.
The Butler weekly times and the Bates County record. (Butler, Mo.) 1918-1950, 1922-11-02
Rev. Clyde's Farewell.

Sunday night Rev. j. 3. Clyde,
for some time past pastor of the
Presbyterian church, preached
his farewell sermon to his Butler
congregation. Other churches
had dismissed their congrega-
tions so that the members could
go and hear what was in all prob
ability his last sermon in the
city. The last of the week Rev.
Clyde and family will move to
Leavenworth, Hans, where he
has accepted charge.
The Butler weekly times and the Bates County record. (Butler, Mo.) 1918-1950, 1922-11-02
Constable Stott Resigns.

Constable johnson Stott, who
has been constable Of Mt. Pleas
ant township for the past nine
years rendered his resignation to
the township board at their meet
ing Saturday. George NJ. Gar
rett was appointed to fill the va
cancy. Constable Stott on ac-
count of i'll health was compelled
to give up his official duties.
The Butler weekly times and the Bates County record. (Butler, Mo.) 1918-1950, 1922-11-02

Mrs. H. E. Sheppard and chill
dren visited Rich Hill relatives
the last of the week.
Mrs. G. H. Argenbright went
to Nevada Friday afternoon for
a short visit with relatives.
Mr.. and Mrs. Ivan Deffen-
baugh were down from Kansas
City spending Sunday with home
folks.
A. G. Stuckey made a trip the
last of the week to northern Mis-.
souri, on q hunt for q carload OF
apples and pears.
Miss Avis Keasling, a student
at the University, at Columbia,
spent the week end in this city
with home folks.
L. L. Graves, of Kansas City,
spent Sunday in this city at the
home Of his parents, Mr. ana
Mrs. VIM. Graves.
Every Republican candidate,
both ON the state and county
tickets are endorsing the Hyde
administration and its policies.
a vote for any one Of them y an
Enforcement Of these policies.
Note the straight Democratic
ticket from top to bottom.
The Butler weekly times and the Bates County record. (Butler, Mo.) 1918-1950, 1922-11-02

w. W. McAdoo, of the Owen
McAdoo Drug Co., was a bust
ness visitor to Kansas City Tues
day.
George Huddleson, of Jeffer-
son City, spent Sunday at the
home Of his parents northeast Of
town. Mr.. Huddleson is an en-
gineer connected with the state
highway department.
P. B. Walton, DR.. j. w. Choate
and F. B. Walton attended a
meeting of the directors of the
Walton Trust Company, which
was held in Kansas City one day
the last Of the week.
Frank Cox and Norton Selling
er were down from Kansas City
spending Sunday with home
folks. Both young gentlemen
are connected with The Walton
Trust Company in that city.
Every Republican candidate,
both on the state and county
tickets are endorsing the Hyde
administration and its policies.
A vote for any one Of them is an
md nvcavn ant %k>~n >l:~.
The Butler weekly times and the Bates County record. (Butler, Mo.) 1918-1950, 1922-11-02
Mrs. Wilhelmina Ahlfeld Dead.

Mrs. Wilhelmina Ahlfeld, for
many years a highly respected
citizen of this community died
at her home southwest Of this
city, Sunday, October 20.
Mrs. Ahlfeld was born in
Germany July II, 1847, but had
been resident of this country
for the past 40 years. Besides
her husband, several children
survive.
The Butler weekly times and the Bates County record. (Butler, Mo.) 1918-1950, 1922-11-02

F. E. Berry is the latest victim
of =" cranky" Ford. He is suf-
fering with a broken bone just
above the right wrist.
Miss Leila Wayland returned
Thursday to her home i'll Kansas
City after visit with relatives
and friends east of town.
Mr.. and Mrs. f. A. Hardin mo-
tored to Kansas City Thursday
Of last week. They report the
roads as being very rough.
Mrs. II. S. Prouty has returned
to her home at Spencer, Nebr.,
after visit here with her par
ents, Mr.. and Mrs. A. H. Herrell.
Chas. Mcfarland, who repre-
sents The Walton Trust company
in Oklahoma, came in the last of
the week for q visit with home
folks.
81. L. Pentzer left the last of
the week for his home at West
Carrollton, O., after q visit in
this city with his sister, Mrs. B.
B. Canterbury.
Gail a Fishers Electric Shop for
m kinds q eIeetrieal suppIies.
ST. Telephone soa.
The Butler weekly times and the Bates County record. (Butler, Mo.) 1918-1950, 1922-11-02
Troy F. Brown Hog Sale
Postponed.

The Duroc Jersey hog sale that
was to have been held by Troy +.
Brown at his farm southwest of
Appleton City, has been post
poned to Friday, November 3.
Those wanting the best in Duroc
Jerseys should not fail to attend
this sale and take advantage Of
the high class offerings.
The Butler weekly times and the Bates County record. (Butler, Mo.) 1918-1950, 1922-11-02
An Accident at The Times Plant.

AS the result of an accident
which stripped a gear in our
cylinder press, The Times was
several hours late last week, and
we We're saved a more serious de-
lay through the courtesy of c. ID.
McNay, publisher of the Repub-
lican-Press who kindly put his
press at our disposal.
The Butler weekly times and the Bates County record. (Butler, Mo.) 1918-1950, 1922-11-02
Darden-Lyons.

Mr.. Harold D. Lyons and Miss
Mary E. Darden, both of this city
were united in marariage Mon
day afternoon at the Recorder
office. Judge B. +. Jeter Off
eating.
The Butler weekly times and the Bates County record. (Butler, Mo.) 1918-1950, 1922-11-02
Brewster to Speak in Butler.

K. r. Brewster, Republican
candidate for United States SEN
ator will address the voters Of
the county at Fisk's Opera
House Friday night.