The Wrangell sentinel., 1922-08-17

would" commented the hotelkeeper You think you put up fine line of English when you are talking. You are satisfied you never make any bad breaks, so feel safe in saying you would welcome criticism, but if some sharp who is wise to all the fancy curves of the language came along, and showed you where you get off, you wouldn't wiring his hand in an ecstasy of gratitude. No, doggone 1t, you would climb on his person and discolor one of his eyes.
 If there's any man makes me tired and sore. it's the one who calls me down when I am speaking piece, and tells me l am making Lindley Murray roll over in his grave. I don't mind if there are only two of us present at the tfme but when there are innocent by islanders around I get all worked up and insist upon a hand to hand con flict. No good sport would do such thing. If you don't like the way talk, you can pass up this hotel when making your daily rounds. If you must hand me a package of criticism or admonition, send it by mail. Then I can read it in the privacy of my own bed room, and there won't be anybody around to raise horse laugh.
 "My education was sadly neglected when I was young. I went to school only a few months and everything I learned was wrong, for the teacher WAS farmer who took up educational work as a recreation when the weather prevented him from cultivating his beans. The little know I accumulat- ed by reading the newspapers and few dime novels.
 Consequently am always taking a fall out of the language. I never could wise myself to the fine points of gram mar, and it was only recently 1 quit saying I done it. and I have went Every now and then an aleck stops me in the middle of discourse and shows me where 1 am wrong, and if there is any way of getting even with that man I always do. There was a drummer for shoe house who used to frequent this place. I took liking to him, and always gave him the best room and saw that his eggs were fresh from the vines. and looked after his comfort generally.
 "One day I was telling him a story, and he stopped me just when l was approaching the peroration, and began to explain the difference between shall and will It seemed that I al- ways used one of these words when should have used the other, and in the goodness of his heart he explained the whole business to me. When he had made everything clear he asked me to finish my story, but I told him, in bit ing sort of way, that I might wound him to the quick by misplacing a few more words, so I would spare him that infilction.
 ''Then he saw he was in bad, and he began telling me how he always liked to be corrected, and he took it for granted that others felt the same way about it, and the more he talked the less use had for him.
 He registered here many times aft CT that, always got the worst room in the house and if there was particu- larly tough steak on hand, it went to him. He tried his hardest to square himself, and was always looking at me, hoping to see winning smile on my chaste lips, but he never got any thing but the arctic glare, and I SUD- pose he's kicking himself, even to this day, because he made that break. And if you want to queer yourself with all your friends, you'll keep up this thing of telling people of their mistakes"