davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1922-09-04
POOR Tenn PLAY2

The prohibition enforcement bureau. sends broad
your expense this statement OF its activities
The people OF Indiana are 20 be congratulated
upon the helpful spirit OF assistance which
given enforcement in this state backed as It Is by
every arm OF the administration. including Indi
ana's delegation in both branches OF congress"
Il would probably be worth the many dollars
which the bureau spends its press agency bureau
If the statements did not arrive the very day
that member OF the presidents cabinet, Secretary
of Labor Davis issues a chapter from his auto
biography IN which he says that the workers need
beer and booze.
II would be fine for he people OF Indiana and all
other states 20 know that the law is backed by
every arm OF the administration. but people
der Why Il happens that some cabinet officers,
named BY AIr. Harding persistent in their
propaganda against the law and give what aid and
comfort they may 20 the boouegger. the home
brewer and the professional wet
It may be simply poor work. It may be
that IN the OF coming elections. the admin
lstration sees a need OF working both sides OF the
street
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1922-09-04
happy conc 81 o. 80.

happy scenes OF long ago.
I've tried Il with the kitchen range.
I've tried the oil stove IN the hall.
I've tried the parlor heating stove;
but none OF them will work at all.
I've built a bonfire in the yard and
heaped on piles OF trash and wood
And gazed al it for hours but find a
bonfire isn't good
For dreaming OF the bygone days.
the smoke gets IN my nose and
eyes.
A man can't get the feeling there,
# doesn't matter how he tries.
And 80 I have decided that IL really
has got 10 be
An open CRATE and nothing else to
paint the scenes Of memory.
All. II only had a friend that had
an open CRATE I'd try
And borrow Il and build a fire and
sit me down and see IL
Could get the inspiration that i
seems the other poets get,
That carries them 10 lands OF
dreams where troubles never
come 10 fret.
But an I guess I'll simply have &c
fold my hands and reconcile
NV yearning until such a time wher
open CRATES come back in style.
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1922-09-04
More Truth
ethan pOQtru
R James . MQNtd6iQ q
N James e

THE NEW JACK TAR.
(sailors along the New York
water front have taken eagerly to
soft drinks.)
The anchors on the bits,
The tide is running free,
The wind. in gusty fits.
Is blowing out TO sea
Propitious. friendly stars
Are shining through the dark,
But where are all the tars
To man the gallant bark?
They're making fudge and drinking
pop
And slipping OF ice cream.
Though we'll aware the breeze is fair
And smooth the favoripg stream.
With lemonade and ginger ale
They're running their lives
Poor Jack, alas! can never pass
Those ice cream soda dives!
In happy days OF yore.
When tars too freely drank,
The captain went ashore
And dragged 'em up the plank
The grog OF some years back
Was potent and intense;
I, always left poor Jack
Devoid Of Will and sense.
But now he takes the modern stuff.
He still can stand and Eight,
or. more discreet. can use his feet
In swift and furtive flight.
So by the slip waits many a chip
Whose crews like bees in hives.
Take sinful sips OF sugary fiips
In ice cream soda dives
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1922-09-04

room floor. nor reads The funny
sheet" aloud 20 her at breakfast.
And ne Is always freshly shaven.
even though he may have been
wrecked on a desert island. with
out a safety-razor. for a week.
And his front hair Is always curly.
and hie nose never peeis IN .he sun.
and his top hair Is always plentiful.
and he hasn't any bald spot on
which he rubs a tonic.
And he Is always tender and fas-
chatting. and takes at least five
minutes toNteu her goodby. instead
or just shouting 1t at her as he
closes the front door
And after a separation. he always
says Darling, II seems like a mil
lion years" instead OF "Gee-it's-good
-to-get-home-what've-got-for din
ner p"
And he never looks as though he
thought che had PRAYED for rain
on Sunday. Just IN order to spell his
golf; nor accuses her OF purpOsely
putting the furniture where he
would fall over it in the dark.
And his stenographer is never
prettier than SHE Is.
And money IS his middle name
and he never growls at the expense
OF taking a taNcab or the price OF
a restaurant dinner.
And he always kisses her without
prompting: and never acts shy OF
embarrassed about it-even wher
she happens 10 be his OWN wife!
Oh. yes. the life Of a Motion Pic.
ture Heroine is all romance and
sentiment. and murder, and Paris
clothes. and variety and excitement
Whereas. almost any normal mar.
ried woman would welcome a fire
or a robbery, or a case OF ptomaine
poisoning-just for a CHANGE
from the eternal monotony,
And a call from a good-loobins
bank burglar or an entertaining
bootlegger or a jolly second-story
man would brighten the existence
of a woman. in whose life the only
masculine distractions are the ice.
man, the postnan and the laundry
man.
Yea. verify. the only PERFECTLY
happy woman in all the world !!
the Motion Picture Heroine,
For no matter how she suffers
she does it in beautiful clothes; and
no matter how she dies, she never
dies Of BOREDOM
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1922-09-04

Infant science very wise,
But when she is exercising
For full straight hour or more,
And her yells are louder rising,
Then its time to walk the floor.
oh, they tell me I must never
Swing her gently to and fro,
Or I'll be her slave forever
And she'll keep me on the go.
Now they seldom let me hold her.
For they're fearful as can be
That I'll ride her on my shoulder
Or will bounce her on my knee.
I'm an old-fashioned father,
And a bouncing dad am 7,
I'm old-fashioned, and Ia rather
Take her up than let her cry.
And I feel an urge compelling
Though they tell me it's unwise,
To do something when she's yelling
And TO fed her when she cries.
Copyright. 1929
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1922-09-04
ALWAYS 4 CRISIS

One OF tho great religious organizations has
called upon IS members for a donation of a tenth
of their incomes to carry forward the message Of
Christianity
The act is not significant the basis of the
appeal which is issued the signatures of its
bishops and declares that civilization itself is facing
crisis.
Our world is summoned TO meet the issue OF It's
moral destiny" says the appeal THE crisis this
transcends immeasurably the military crisis of
the period OF the war. Then men feared those who
had power to kill the body; men stand awed
and fearsome in the presence Of forces which
threaten civilization body and soul into hell
1t might be added that there is never a period
in the history OF the world or of the individual
which is not a moral crisis. Each day brings
ward its temptations and its threats to be met by
conscience and educated thought.
1t is repeated that man is a religious animal 1t
quite he retains primitive
and very savage instincts inherited from day and
age when the brotherhood OF not part
OF human concept or thought.
These impulses are ever at work, upon and
women, single and alone. and upon society as
whole
Just why the moral crisis is greater today than
I was dozen years ago is not explained Prob
ably these religious leaders look upon the changing
habits of mankind. brought about by eondi-
tons of life and by invention dangerous to the
old and established customs.
But they dangerous to the Ten Com
rnandments which form the basis of law and of
ife in civilized communities. The temptations Of
today are the same temptations to which men have
always been subjected and which they have mostly
conquered even though they appear in new form.
Any movement to carry the message OF the Man
Of Galilee to the uttermost corners OF the world
will always receive support. But that there is
grave danger OF man losing all religious. all moral
standards under any change Of our commercial
social order is debatable.
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1922-09-04

s,rating that there are laws which protect rspu-
iations from the thoughtiess
The woman arrested pleaded guilty 10 repeating
story that she had heard 20 the effect that the
two girls had been intoxicated. She admitted that
che did know the girls had no reason to be-
iieve the story, and had simply passed along
that was told her She did not even have malice.
Neither did she that charity in heart which
would dictate that such stories be disbe!ieved until
proven
The law in Indiana Is quite plain upon the sub
jet but it is not often invoked. Most people who
targets for false stories prefer let them
die the natural death of all fasehood. rather than
TO keep them alive by presenting them the public
Perhaps this is the reason that the habit Of
gossip has been uneurbed and unchecked until It
more sorrow and tragedy and tears than
other single cause.
These girls. who found themselves the subject Of
unfavorabe comment by persons whom they did
not know. took The provided in the laws and
caused the arrest Of a woman who simply acted as
carrier OF the poison.
The fine she paid was small The lesson she
learned was great
The early Furitans. with their rigors OF morals.
provided the stocks for those who permitted them
selves to become the victims OF such habits Of
talk
Psychologists try TO explain the gossip
theory that It Is the expression OF an 'inferorty
complex" in which those who recognize their own
faults seek hide the defects by parading evil OF
others. Those who not so scientific rut It down
to idleness, 10 a lack of real purpose in life to
bad disposition and 70 Ignorance that compels the
sossiper to talk OF persons rather than things
Whatever it is. ShelbyviI,e has found the cure.
Walk the streets Of that city. and you will not dis
cover the OF its citizens tossed about care
lessly. The woman who paid for her ndiscretion
taught that community lesson.
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1922-09-04
MEDITATIONS OF A
MARRIED WOMAN

Alas. would that I were a Mo-
ton Picture Heroine!
For, whatever she does. 1t Is never
counting the linen for the Monday
laundry, nor making up the grocery
list for dinner.
1t is ALWAYS something inter-
esting or exciting-even If it's only
dying, or killing somebody!
And, whatever she wears, II Is
never a dust-cap and rubber gloves
but always a creation" or a con
fection''-even If it's only a string
of pearls and a few yards Of tulle.
And, whatever her lover may be
"a housebreaker. a murderer. or
even a dancing mamie is never
hungry!
Whatever he may do. he never
forgets where he put his collar but
ton nor leaves the soap on the bath
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1922-09-04
dust EQlRS @z &69 zzzssz
rHE oLD-FAsHIoNED FATHEk

THE OLD-FASHIONED FATHEE
They tell me I'm old-fashioned,
And l fancy that 1 am,
But when meals are four-hour IA
toned
And the baby wants to cram
Just a little in between en-
And declares il with a cry,
Then I want to contravene EN-,
Let her eat her Ill" say 1.
oh. know the rules Of science,
And its edicts just and terse,
And I bow in meek compliance
To the doctor and the nurse
II is wise, there's no denying,
To be thoughtful in hex care;
But when hunger starts her crying
would feed her then and there.
Now they tell me that a baby
Cries 10 get her exercise,
And I must admit that maybe
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1922-09-04
VERSE o" CHEER
By Edgar L. Jones
on THE OPEN CRATE.

IN LIE OEG<N Ohi16.
Each poet I have known has writ
ten sometime in his life
About the open CRATE that brings
sweet dreams 10 Danish care and
strife:
The sparks that flicker up the fire
and rudy flames that picture
there
The memories OF bygone days that
chase away all grief and care.
And I can close my eyes and see the
old arm chair so cozily
Inviting poets by the score 10 come
and test their memory.
I've often longed 10 find that spot
that dreamily they write about,
Where pictures form so readily I'd
like 10 try that feeling out.
I'd Ike 20 find that old arm chair
and see the CRATE fires rudy
glow.
And see II Il would paint for me the
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1922-09-04
Bill hrmstron5

Imagine getting a letter from
the secretary of the treasurer
every month, reading Ike this.
Dear WiIber:-It pains mo
greatly To have to write you again
this month that he will be unable
20 pay the usual .nstallmsent this
month. King George writes in
that he IS all but broke having
purchased some oil stock that
failed 10 pan out. France cant
pay dime until II succeeds in
moving some OF its grapes and
cognac, and the laundry business
is IN such shape in China that OF
course we can't expect any help
in this direction for the time be-
ing. If YOU VII just be patient.
WILDER, I think we will be success
full In stirring up a few sheckelS
some where 10 take care Of the
next installment en- your bonus
in the near future.
sincerely Yours.
ANDY MELLON,
Secretary OF the Treasurer.
P. S. Do you think the boys IN
South Bend would be interested in
getting their next several install
ments in three star Cognac? It's
a very good run Of Cognae and
could be paid TO the boys that were
willing, at the rate Of about So cents
per quart.
If the soldiers have to go out and
collect their own bonus. we can't
see any reason why we shouldn't
get busy Immediately and start col
lecting. We suggest that former
lance Corp. Louie Wolf be dis
patched at once to Switzerland to
see what can be done about collect
ing the interest on the Swiss debt.
This has been a dandy year for
yodling and Switzerland ought TO be
ready to kick in. in good shape. And
Mr.. Wolf we feel is the man that
can put over this job in good shape.
We would also like to suggest that
Pvt. First Glass Norman Adler be
assigned to the task Of getting some
money out of King George, but
Norm would probably go over thei c
and get George, old boy, interested
in a Society Brand suit. and forget
all about the important errand he
was on.
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1922-09-04

months OF the yea YOU viii End the
Elaborated Roonng &C. 107 W Divi-
sion St. rapidly growing and taking
care OF It's customers The Elabor-
sted Roofing Co. Is a part or this city
For the past ten years Il has made
an enviabIe record IN the roofing
business. Like many others you VIII
profit by investigating the merits OF
Elaborated Roofs. The Elaborated
Office IS also headquarters for the
popular Warren Paints. "The Right
Paint 70 Paint Rigat" For real
protection OF your home you can
not equal the combi6Gtion OF Elab-
GRATED Roofing and Warren Paint
adv-222-tf
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1922-09-04
WHAT 'IRITIS" is AND THE
WAYS To GET RELIEF
By ROYAL S. COPELAND, NJ. D.
Commissioner of Health, New York

Commissioner of Health. New York
City.
There are all kinds Of suffering
carache, brainache, heart pain-but
there is no more agonizing than that
caused by iritis.
The colored part Of the We is the
iris. 1t is brown, or blue, or black,
or variegated in color. The iris is
really a muscle or several delicate
layers of muscles. The black patch
in the middle OF the iris is a hole
in the iris. This is the pupil, which
varies in size as. the muscles Of the
iris dilate and contract it.
As 1 have said. the main sub
stance of the iris is muscle, and it is
subject to all the diseases muscles
have. Rheumatism is one of these,
of course. So we have rheumatic
iritis."
Normally, the IRIS mas lestre and
brilliancy. In iritis Is becomes
muddy and duh.
The pupil. which reacts TO light
and shade, changing its size almost
constantly, becomes dxed IN iritis.
There is a peculiar zone Of red
ness in the white OF the eye. This
zone surrounds the IRIS and gradu-
ally widens and deepens in color.
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1922-09-04

To call at a place where you can
find what you went after. This shop
ping all around town ond not get
ting what You want is hard on the
nerves. You won't need nerve tonic
and spend all your money II you can
get Il IN the habit Of coming 10 our
supply store We wiz be slad TO
show you that II VIII be a pleasure
20 call again. ludwig Auto supply.
Advt.-28b-tf
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1922-09-04
MOOnshinerS Increase
Price after Each Fine

POPLAR BLUFF. No. Sept a.
Moonshlners have found that e pays
70 advertise. and they have intro
duoed a novel stunt in Southeast
Missouri
They welcome arrests. When ar
rested their names get IN the paper:
they pay their hnes, boost the prics
or moOnshine 20 meet the fines. ard
business booms They say the re-
suits have been very encouraging.
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1922-09-04
The Tower

Today Is Labor day. To the man
that spends the day changing tires
and hunting the right road. IL will
seem 20 have been we'll named
We met one union man yesterday
that said he would knock oft today
and celebrate Labor day. All the
other union men presumably are
out on a strike.
It's not so bad TO have no coal
in your basement but when you
have nothing but mess Of empty
bottles besides, then life becomes
hardly worth living.
FACTS REGARDING THE WELL
KNOWN BONUS.
The senate has passed the bonus
law for former soldiers and now It
goes TO Pres't Harding for his veto.
1t Is presumed that the president
will veto the measure. 1t Is known
positively that Mr.. Harding has
three or four nice vetoes brushed
off and all ready to hang onto some
law. SO there IS hardly any DOUBT
but what one viii get tackled onto
the bonus bill.
When Mr.. Harding was running
for president, he seemed all wrap
ped up with the idea of paying the
former veterans bonus. Several
soldiers voted for him because or
his statements along this line. But
since he got to the white house,
he's been about as strong for the
soldiers as Bryan is for white
mule"
If he runs again he's going to
miss those several votes he got from
the American legion the last time.
One nice thing about the new
bonus bill is that the soldiers Will
get their money from the interest
on the money the foreign countries
borrowed from the United States
during the war. A sweet plan!
Whenever an ex-soldier wants to
raise a little money in the future.
instead of going to a pawn broker
and hooking his gold teeth, he can
jump on a boat for Europe and tear
in an bawl out the king and queen
personally, who have been a little
slow in forwarding their interest
money 10 Washington.
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1922-09-04
AFTER WE DIE.

The young king of SIAM Maha vajravudh
ries his cousin. Princess Lakshi Lavan One wife Is
enough. says he. abolishing the custom Of main
tainng royal harem.
This is big sensation in the orient. For the old
king. HIahas father. had 500 wives.
Human nature being about the all the
world the siamese taxpayers probably glad to
the harem expire.
This new king" you reflect. must be pro-
Iressive chap with modern ideas He is enlightened"
King Maha's adjustment OF the royal harem
illustrates vividly the great changes that
one generation goes TO the graveyard and a
generation takes its place.
What with the World war and ALL the present
generation has made friEhtful botch of its job
Men have walled themselves into bad situation.
They run about. like caked animals. seeking an
exit
Every day some ouack steps forth in the field of
economies and sociology with "cure-alL" He
claims he has the magic medicine that will bring
rest and peace out OF unrest and
All this attempt 70 stabilize conditions Is COM
mendabIe But the probability is that the big
problems will be solved by the rising generation.
The man who falls into we'll IS usually pulled
out by himself
The worlds hope IS in the youngsters who
marching through school days 20 take Up where
leave or They going inherit big problems
And they are going to solve them for they Will get
on the Job with fresh energy snd new viewpoint
The generation that staged the Civil War in our
country left everything an awful mess" The
generation that followed developed the country and
It's wealth and restored the damage until PROS
rerity hung the trees
It was the same in other important countries
Then the young generation got old and smashed
things 10 ruins. History repeats.
Naturally, it would be foolish for to lie down
and quit cold. letting problems grow worse until
youngsters grow up. But the hope OF civilization
IS unquestionaby in the boys and girls returning to
school after vacation. The best way to solve our
problems Is 70 make those boys and girls ef-
hcient sensible ana straight thinking lies with
in power
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1922-09-04

one woman in sorrow and other women in eau
tion are thinking twice az shelbyville before they
handy stories they hear about other women
Two girls. the subject OF idle tale. have caused
the reform by the simple exrsdient OF bringing
parveyor OF the story before q Judge and demon
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1922-09-04

They usually hnd out that some
thing IN the line Of toilet articles
has been forgotten. Tale powder.
shaving creams. shaving powders.
soaps. razors-we've got them all
at regular prices.
GOLDIE AfANN'S FOUR STORES
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1922-09-04
DENTISTRY

For reliable dentistry consult Drs.
Carson & Oren. 125 w. Washing
ton av. Phone Main 54g.-adv cost;
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1922-09-04

What makes nalf bald man madden than buy
ing a whole hair cut2
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1922-09-04

Love nests are Matching out breach of promise
suits.
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1922-09-04
TRANGE ISN'T 1T

No one has any trouble in finding
bootlegger except the dry enforce
ment officers.
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1922-09-04

ALWAYS A HIT.
The most popular music this win
ter will be made by the coal rafting
down the chute.
FOREwARNED Is PROGRAMMED.
NO statesman nowadays Will an
nounce where he stands on a public
question till he takes a hasty glance
at the Literary Digest.
Copyright, 1920
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1922-09-04

If he runs again he's going to
miss those several votes he got from
the American legion the last time.
The Brattleboro daily reformer. (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1913-1955, 1922-07-21
BRATTLEBORO PERSONAL

Miss Jessie Rotnour of Utica, n. Y,
is a guest of her cousin, DIR. Elizabeth
p Bailey.
Mrs. ]. c. Henkel who visited her
mother, Mrs f. A. Jacobs, in Jamaica.
has returned home.
Mrs Frank L. Reed began yesterday
vacation from her work in the Hol-
stein Friesian association offices.
Mr. and Mrs r. L. Chase and Mrs
J. w Oney of Randolph were visitors
here today and were guests at the Brooks
House.
Mrs. Amy T. Sweet has returned to
her home in North Bennington after
visiting 10 days in the home of Mrs. +.
+. Pier.
Mrs w. H. H. Holton and Miss Har-
riet Rogers of Troy, n, Y, and j. III.
Bemis of Orlando, Fla, are guests at
Judge +. l.. Waterman's.
Mr. and Mrs George w Orvis of
Essex Junction have been visiting Mr..
and Mrs. Sewall Purinton. They left
yesterday by automobile for Tarrytown,
n. Y.
Miss Helen Longueil. Miss Maybelle
Spaulding and Miss Elsie Danyew. who
are employed in Houghton & Simonds' 5
store, Will leave Monday for a vacation
eff two weeks at Mantle, Conn.
Miss Agnes Doyle and Miss Florence
Danyew, employees of the Holstein- Erie
sian association offices, will begin a two
weeks vacation from their work Mon
day. They will go to Mantle, Conn.