The Raymer enterprise. (New Raymer, Weld County, Colo.) 1910-19??, 1922-08-24


They are deserving people. and you
feel II duty to help them along, so
the first thing you know your mail boz
Is jammed full Of literature. Having
paid for II, you feel ihat You ought 10
read II. and Jour life is ruined thereby.
"When was young, the magazines
tried to entertain people. They had
good stories and a Poets Corner and a
department devoted TO timely Jokes.
and another to household hints and do
nestle recipes. There was some sense
In reading magazine then. for II
soothed and sustained you. But now.
adays the magazine editors consider IL
their duty to harrow your soul ana
make your hair stand on end Ike
quilts upon the porkful fretcupine, Of
words to that effect They are always
viewing with alarm. and trying to con
vince you that yOn take your life In
your hand every five minutes.
'They hive lot of health special.
lists writing for them, and these health
sharps point out that pretty near ev.
crything You eat and drink Is deadly
poison. They didn't scare me to any
great extent. for am most intrepid
man. but they soon had my wife so
ratified she didn't know whether she
was going or coming.
II always was passlonately fond of u
good cup Of coffee. and my wife could
make the best coffee. you ever heard
of. She went to work ut II like q
learned apothecary compromising
prescription. d'here was no guess
work about 1t. She took an honest
pride In 1t, ard her coffee was revc,
latIOn 10 every consumer. used to lie
awake at night wishing Il was break
fast time. so could have my mornipg
cup Of coffee.
"But one morning when ! went TO
the table the coffee was missing. In
Its place there was sickly beverage |
had never seen before. asked an ex.
PLANTATION, and my wife said that no
more coffee would be made in our
house. The wonder Is, said she. that
we still live and move and have our be-
ing, for coffee is rank poison. II yor
read DIR. Zlnkfaogle's article 10 the
Junkopolltan Magazine, you will sec
that coffee contains large percentage
Of tannin, which Is so deadly that L
you place a drop on the tongue OF an
alligator. It will roll over, dead"
II told ner that had no alligntors
on the premises. and consequently could
not try the experiment. but ! assured
her that l didn't care anything about
the poison. | wanted my coffee at
regular hours. She said I'd have to
keep on wanting. She thought too
much Of me to send me to an untlmely
grave. And. anyhow, she explained
DIR. Zlnkfoogle had told how to make
substitute for coffee that was perfect
ly wholesome. She had followed his
instructions, and the result was before
me. Perhaps It didn't taste as good as
coffee, but It was wholesome. II would
All my veins with red corpuscles and
restore hair TO my bald head. It was
made Of marrowfat peas which had
been carefully roasted in hot oven.
"In order to get cup Of coffee after
that ! had to make a sneak to the
chop house, and the kind dished up
there made me old before my time. My
wife cut out all my fayorite dishes be
cause DR.. Znkfoogle or some other
magazine writer denounced them. and
finally l was living on roasted peas
coffee and boiled spinach. and con-
cluded that II had to feed like the
cows I'd live like them. SO came to
the forest Businesses"