davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington herald., 1922-07-06
SITUATIONS WANTED


Afro MECHANIC HELPER: ExPE-
fienced. 4. n. G. A EMPLOYMENT
DEPT. 1870 ct nv. 272
EXPERIENCED HOTEL CLERK; HAS
been empIoyed Al night clerk. Y. NJ c.
A. EMPLOYMENT DEPT. i7ss @ ct; NV.
7. N. C. A. EMPLOYMENT DEPT. lise
q ct. NV. 21s
B0oKHEEPERs.. ACCOUNTANT. AUDI
tors az your service: let m know Jour
wants spd - vii, promptly OIL them.
NATL CEnsvNNEL BUREAU. sos Bond
Bldg, 18th and n 7. ave ga
MIDDLE AGE Man DESIRES POSITION
as watchman Y. N. Q. A. EMPLOY
MENT DEPT. 1876 q st pw 272
EXPERIENCED. TYPIsT AND CLERK DE.
sires position; SIS per week. Y. N. c. A.
EMPLOYMENT DEPT. 1875 @ St M.
SINGLE WHITE MAN DESIRES POSITION
as janitor y. NJ. Q. A. EMPLOYMENT
DEPT. 1875 @ 81. NV. 12
CHAUFFEUR DEsfREs PosiTfoN WITH
C. A. EMPLOYMENT DEPT. iT3e q st. nv.
27e
FIRST CLANS AUTO MECHANIC DESIRES
position. Y NJ c. A. EMPLOYMENT
DEPT. 1888 C st. nv 217
GOOD FNGINEEn DESIRES POSITION
with chance for advancement. 7. g.
A. EMPLOYMENT DEPT.. 1885 ST. nv.
Female.
LATNDREssEs. COOK. SUPPLIED FREE.
FULLER's EXCHANGE. phone West 21ss.
i2ei 25th st. 80
OVER $50 OF THE LARGEST CONNER
cial concern. In town use our personal
service; they have tested it and know Its
merfts: "a 10 also at ycur service Just call
Main ga NATL PERSONNEL BUREAU.
3o5 Bond Bldg. l4.h and n. Y. ave. 21a
The Washington herald., 1922-07-06
$4,000, 900
Humble Oil and Refining Company .
TEMYEAR $40 GOLD DEBENTURE BONDS
Infersst Payable yaauGry IS nd July II
TEN-YEAR $40 GOLD

Principal ond .r.e-,st payable !. Ner Yort CITY.
The Washington herald., 1922-07-06
tn he dated July Is, 1929.
To ~sdtxre JxIs Is, 1882.

o Of o0anis .f
s.nds
Redeemdbs M the
a.d
ond thsreaft h h~atu,
The Washington herald., 1922-07-06
For Rent-Stores and Offices.

N. Y. AVE. Mr.. Nth sr.-sTCDfo OR
office: Is per mo LOUIS p. sH0E-
MAKER. 1401 n Y. ave, NV. Main lise
FLORIDA AVE. NR. CONN AvE-LARGB
front room. hrst floor LOUIS p. sH0H-
MAKER t1oT y Y. rvr~nw Ms,p Itas.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1922-12-22

is to stabilize the prices of next years
turkey crop.
There is much dissatisfaction here
with the way the commission men
have been handling the market situa-
tion. They charge that the merchants
often set the price of turkeys arbi-
trarily without regard to he available
supply or the demand, telling the pro-
ducers what they will get and the
consumers what they must pay, both
thereby.
Hereafter 1t is hoped, the growers
themselves will be able to set and de-
mand a fair price on their birds based
on a reasonable cost of production,
and that the new association will be
able to enforce the price.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1922-12-22
TURKEY MEN ORGANIZE
TO STABILIZE PRICES

'COLUSA, Cal, Dec. 22-(U. PO-
Following the disastrous break in Tur-
keS prices the morning before
Thanksgiving, and because San Fran
cisco commission merchants have pre-
dieted that Christmas turkeys will not
net the growers more than 80 cents
n pound, steps are being taken here to
form Northern California Turkey
Growers Association which shall
guarantee a fair price to the producer
in the future
The association will include turkey
growers in Yolo, Sutter Yuba. Butte,
Colusa. Glenn, and Placer counties.
Later it may take in all the northern
counties.
The proposed association, which
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1922-12-22
Notice for Bids

Il Sealed proposals will be received by
the Water Commission of the City of
Pcndleton until December 29th, 1922,
g. o'clock p. NJ. for the annual audit
of the books of the Water Office. Bids
shall be submitted in writing marked
Proposal to Audit Books of The Wa
ter Commission. The Commission re-
serves the right to reject any and all
bids.
.s j. 7. BROWN. Chairman.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1922-12-22
RADIATOR REPAIRING
RESTAURANT
SHOE REPAIRING

THE QuBLLE-A good plac. TO =.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1922-12-22

LIGHTNING-S STRANGE Battery Com
pound-Startles the scientific world,
better than Sulphuric acid. and charg-
es discharged batteries Instantly. Will
not Freeze or Overcharse.-Live wire
wanted for Eastern Oregon distributor.
Write or inquire II. r. Frevert, GIG
Garden St, Pcndleton, ore.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1922-12-22

will employ all of the approved meth
DDS of cooperative marketing, will
meet in Marysville early in January.
The prospective members Of the asso-
citation have stated that their one aim
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1922-12-22

YOUNG MARRIED MAN with family
wants work-good education, pleas
ing appearance--some experience as
salesman, excellent dairyman and
farmer, will consider anything
Gress II this office.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1922-12-22

WANTED TO RENT-S room furnish.
ed apt. or house--stearn or furnace
heated Phone 721-M.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1922-12-22

| WANTED--Woman for general house
| Work-references reqquired.-Mrs.
| Ben TTombley, III Lewis st.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1922-12-22

ALL KINDS of plain sewing-chil-
drens sewing a specially. also mers
shirts-10S Jefferson Phone $751;.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1922-12-22
WANTED

STENOGRAPHER wishes position
Address 16 this office.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1922-12-22

WANTED-Sewlng and braiding.--
Phone 1028-J or 120 Lee street.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1922-12-22
$ DAY s

SO and SO neckties on sale Satur-
day at Dorfman's, 120 E. Webb for 81
each. Also fancy articles for ladies 81
each.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1922-12-22

ONE EXTRA GOOD DODGE COM
mercial car at Il reasonable price
Pendleton Auto Co.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1922-12-22
Best Late NJ

Best Late Xmas Gifts
For a last minute Christmas gift
think of flowers! See Forshaws stock
OF seasonable plants-Open sunday.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1922-12-22

FOR RENT-Large furnished three
room apt.-l09 Water St, Phone
5l4-J or 10.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1922-12-22
Gifts Available Sunday

Forshaw, Florist, with his flowers
and dainty blooming plants will re-
main open sunday.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1922-12-22

FOR RENT room furnished apt,
). gentlemen preferred.-Apply at sos
Il. Court.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1922-12-22
HEMSTITCHING
LAUNDRY
New and Second Hand Dealers


V. STROBLE, dealer in new and sec
ond hand goods. Cash paid for sec
ond hand goods. Cheapest place to
buy household goods.-210 Il. Court
Phone 271-W.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1922-12-22
NEW TODAY

FOR SALE-Doll buggy, one half
price.-616 Thompson st.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1922-12-22

1920 STUDEBAKER Special six road
ster 500.00-Pendleton Auto Co.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1922-12-22

WANTED TO BITY--10 head of good
milch cows.--Address Box 6S3, Pen
oleton, Ore.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1922-12-22

FOR SALE CHEAP--11l5 acre
wheat ranch in eastern Washing
ton. rich soil, level. plenty wat ".
good crops. S. Murray, Windsor
apartments, Seattle, Wash.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1922-12-22

FOR SALE-Coal heater, wood heat
er and range.-412 &V, Bluff, Phone
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1922-12-22
FOR SALE

EMPIRE DAIRY-WhoIesaIe and re-
tail.--Phone SF2.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1922-12-22

condition.-Phone SGS, 722 Cotton
wood St
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1922-12-22
NOT ICES


AUTOMOBILE STORAGE - store
your car for the winter, $3.50 per
month.-Call Penland Bros.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1922-12-22

FOR SALE-zLate 1922 Haynes-55
touring, an excellent buy.-722 Cot
tonwood St, Phone SGS.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1922-12-22

. o o . . q
. TIME CARD
. Pilot Rock Stage
. Evan Cameron, Prop.
. Leaves Pilot Rock 500 a. m. =
. Leaves Pendleton 1890 a. m.
= Leaves Pilot Rock 100 p, m.
. Leaves Pendleton $500 p. m.
. Leaves Hotel Pendleton and
D French Restaurant.
Daily Freight Stage
. Leaves Pilot Rock $3.50 a. n.
Leaves Pendleton 1890 a. IN. 4
o o Q
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1922-12-22
CT ASSIFIED
For Rent, Etc, Classified for Easy Reference,
Notices. Business Opportunities, Locals, Lost, Found

FOR SALE Chester White male
hogs.-J. a. Porter, Pilot Rock, Ore
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1922-12-22

FOR SALE-Good young work horses
Inquire Sturgis & Storie.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1922-12-22

AND DENTIST-C. w. Iassen, NJ. D.
V.-Phonc %. office Phone 20.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1922-12-22
Painting and Paper Hanging

PAINTS. Wall Paper. Picture Franz
Ing. l.. J. McAtee, the Practical
Paint Man-Lowe Bros. Paints.
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1922-05-25

TIVE bsst card in the Republican
hand when the November elections
draw nigh will be economy. General
Dawes, director Of the budget COM
mi0ion, in Office little more than .
year, 10 able to show in his recent re-
pert = reduction Of 91,615, So, 059 in
9svurnHsent expeaditures for tn. AaeAl
pear 1872 from the actual expeasss of
1871. In this showing, admittedly In
complete, the new budget system has
hsd considerable but not the most
important part. Money saved through
the executive pressure" exercised by
the redoubtable General Dawes
amounts to $250.134.S36 Of the total
amount For the remainder we have
to thank the inevitable processes Of
after-war dehation and the general
pressure for economy that has been
put upon congress and the govern
ment departments by the administra-
ton This administrations insistence
on economy has been back of the most
striking reductions The various de-
partmeEts and bureaus, under the
whip and spur of the administration.
have managed TO cut 1907 $50, 407
from their ordinary, everyday, rou-
tine expenditures This is the sig
nihcant and hopeful thing about the
figures that General Dawes has sub
nitted to the house of representatives
and given to cheer up debt bur
dened country.
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1922-05-25

There are two species Of palms
producing nuts hard enough to be en-
ployed as 4 substitute for ivory In
the manufacture Of small articles Of
domestic use. but the one best known
to commerce under the name Of ivory
nut Is the fruit Of Phytehephas mac
rocarpa, native Of New Granada and
other parts Of Central America
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1922-05-25

This is . very dangerous disease,
particularly to children under five
year Of age, but when no paregoric,
codeine or other opiate is given, is
easily cured by giving Chamberlain's
Cough Remedy Most people believe
that it must run its course, not know
ing that the time is very much short
ened, and that there is little danger
from the disease when this remedy is
given. It has been used in many cpl
denies of whooping couph, with pro-
success. 1t is safe and pleas
ant to take.
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1922-05-25

1T is great thing to have such a
demonstration as was given US dur
ing the wars Of the United States Of
the capacity Of men for sacrifice, for
II makes US think better Of our kind.
The soldiers in all our wars were In
no way different from their friends
and neighbors. Drawn from the great
masses Of our people. they were rep
reaentatlvs Of them. More broadly,
they were representatives Of human
ity--that humanity Of which so many
seem to despair. Hcroism is no I'M
usual thing in the life Of man, and in
great crises It is the rule. The World
war furnished new proof Of this to
the generation that has grown up
since our civil struggle, and that
knows it only a great historical event.
There ought to be renewal and
strengthening Of faith in man and
new birth Of optimism. America Is
the one country above all others in
which there should be no place for
doubters and winners. Rather the
feeling should be that what men have
done men can do, and that there is no
task beyond the powers of Americans
nor any sacrifice which they will not
make at the call Of duty. The heroic
strain in the blood has not died out
as we learned during the years Of
war. The problem is one Of making
effective the great qualities and APP
plying them to life. And the prob
lem Is by no means easy. The proper
and reverent observance Of Memorial
day will help toward solution. Graf
itude there must always be to the men
who saved the Union and laid anew
the foundations for = greater and
nobler national life. Though our
gratitude cannot profit those who
were killed in the war, or have died
since, grateful hearts have = bene-
fetal effect ON those who possess
them. lngratitude, on the other hand,
II one Of the basest Of sins. And
nothing can be more destructive than
sslfshness, which is the antithesis Of
sacrifice. The moral value Of the
teaching Of the day Is Of enormous
value. II il the day Of men who pre-
ferrcd national well-being and safety
to personal ease and pleasure--to life
itself. 1t 10 through that spirit only
hat the land can BE- redeemed and
Kept true to the great ideals in behalf '
of which brave men have gladly given :
their lives.
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1922-05-25
wound uD.-

] had been scolding one evening.
The next afternoon my neighbor
dropped In TO inquire about my sister
Jennie. who had been sick. said
guessed the only thing that allied her
was that she was run down. Little
Bob. four years old, who had been
listening, piped up: well. mother.
why don't Aunt Jennie GET wound up
Ike dad said you were last night7"
Cleveland Plain Dealer.
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1922-05-25

HUMAN existence seems to be just
: one darned week after another.
We have had health week, hospital
week, cleanup week and the COED
Lord only knows what. Nobody seems
to know what It's all about, but ev-
erybody seems to be doing it. 1t is
fair to suppose that If one wants to
be perfectly orthodox one must get
sick during hospital week and stay
well during health week; during clean
up week he should change clothes,
take 9 bath and wash the teeth and
clean the finger nails. Now some-one
suggests . mind-your-own business
week. And we're in favor Of it.
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1922-05-25

Scientists announce the return Of a
group Of stars after an absence of
several years. But II scientists want
to create interest and enthusiasm they
should announce the return Of Mr..
Hennessey's famous Three-star con-
stellation.
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1922-05-25

A single pair of sparrows and a
nest Of their young consume about
5000 insects a week. Say what you
please about sparrows, they are good
workers even if they are poor must
clans.
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1922-05-25

0LD-TIME politicians whose early
memories stretch back ~ far as
pre-Civil war times say the Missouri
ssna torial contest of 1922 has not had
its like in intensity since the days Of
Thomas H. Benton. Benton repre-
scented Missouri in the United States
senate from the time Of its admis-
sion to the union.
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1922-05-25

The Krupps stole our inventions
patented them and now want us to pay
them 25 million in royalties. Why
not ask Va for twice that amount. VIZ
won't pay it anyhow.
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1922-05-25

slices, and run the pint Of the knife
around jist inside the rtns and throw
the insides and the seeds away, and
they got rubber bands, gentlemen,
they got rubber bands!"
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1922-05-25

We are still loaning Europe money.
Uncle Sam is the only individual we
know that will make second loan
to fellow who refuses to pay his
first loan.
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1922-05-25
l See That

An Ohio man has been fined 500
for hugging . girl. II the Ohio girls
are A. attractive as the Emmett girls
II was worth it.
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1922-05-25

The u. s. attorney general has
started the slogan, "Get the profit
GERS" Where have we heard that
before? Oh, yes, when Palmer was in.
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1922-05-25

Government law enforcement Off
GERS captured 200 bottles of Scotch
whisky in New York and stored 1t for
night. The next morning it had all
turned to water.
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1922-05-25
Chamberlain's Tablets Are Mild and
ENnfIA II, Effect

The laxative effect of Chamber
lain's Tablets is so mild and gentle
that you can hardly realize that II
has been produced by medicine.
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1922-05-25
A nostenIan Lsssen.

Pronounce Cannes" with the Bos-
tonian "a" AZ in dance" to rhyme
with "aunts' and not With "ants.
Boston Globe.
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1922-05-25

| Every once in while one reads in
the papers Of men and women in Ida
no who have not been away from the
neighborhood where they located when
they first came to the state 80, 40 or
so years ago. Such one was Uncle
Billy Bender, Civil war veteran. Un-
til few weeks ago he had not seen
an electric light, telephone, a phon-
ograph or an automobile. He was
amazed when he came to town, COM
PEELED to come in order to close deal
for the sale of his mining property.
He was much interested in automo-
biles and hung around the towns gar
age nearly all the time. Finally an
agent for a well known make of car
gave him demonstration and had
Uncle Billy interested. The agent
pressed his vantage and seeing Uncle
Billy on the point Of yielding, took
out his book Of contracts, The con-
tracts were sheafed together viii, with an !
elastic band--a common black rubber |
band. And it was the first one Uncle
Billy had ever seen. "Jest let me see
that thing" demanded Uncle Billy.
The agent passed him the rubber
band. continuing his talk about the
contract. Uncle Billy was inatten-
tive. He stretched the rubber band,
and studied its structure with all the
interest of = small boy with his fifst
tin trumpet "Now if you'll just sign
here on this line" said the agent;
but here Uncle Billy interrupted to
ask. "What'll you take for this!"
And forthwith the agent decided to
clinch the trade and made Uncle Billy
\ present of the rubber band. But
Uncle Billy didn't sign. He had lost
interest in the auto. The rubber band
was all-satisfying. A few days later
Uncle Billy was back home. He show I
ed his rubber band to the few men
in the mine-fellow owners
and neighbors of Uncle Billy's. He ,
showed his rubber band to them. None Z
had ever seen one. And then Uncle I
Billy, in reply to questions as to how .
he bands were made, proceeded to
slucidate. when l was in the war"
said Uncle Billy, 81 seed them for the
irst time. In the South the rubber
'ruit grows like cucumber, on a vine.
They is different sizes. But when
hey gets ripe, gentlemen-when they ,
sets ripe, they pick 'em; and then 1
hey takes a sharp, keen knife and I
hey slices them rubber melons in thin {
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1922-05-25
TALES OF TOWN
A REGULAR PRAYER

Lord, let me live like Regular Man
i With Regular friends and true;
Let me play the game on Regular
| plan
And play that way all through;
Let me win or lose with Regular
smile
And never be known to whine, !.
For that is Regular Fellows" style
And l want to make it mine.
Oh, give me Regular chance in life,
The same rs the rest, l pray,
And give me 4 Regular girl for wife
To help me along the way;
Let US know the lot Of humanity,
Regular woes and joys,
And raise \ Regular family
OF Regular girls and boys!
Let me live to Regular good old age,
With Regular snow-white hair,
Having done my labor and earned my
wage,
Andd played my game for fair;
And so at last when the people scan,
My face on its peaceful bier,
They'll say, "Well, he was q Regular
Mani"
And drop Regular tear.
A sure remedy for indigestion is to
work your stomach less and your lawn
mower.
We refuse to believe in the Darwin |
theory because no monkey can screw |
its face up to look like that Of = man
who is shaving.
When asked at Sunday school,
What is an Epistle!' an S-ysar-old
responded, IAN Epistle is the wife of
an Apostls."
III It were not for women where
would the churches be Z" asks = reli-
gious paper. Well, for that matter,
where would any Of US be?
The happiest man is one who is part
Irishman and part Jew. The Irish
man is happy II he has dollar and
the Jew always has one.
Go down the street carrying a FISH
ing pole ut this time of year. and ev-
erybody you meet will ask you if you
are going fishing.
Z q 4
Zero hour" is that time when the
last quart Of cherries has come up
from the basement and the new crop
IS not ripe on the trees. /,
= |
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1922-05-25

Time may rob US of our teeth and
hair, but it can't take away the mem
DRY of how good the ground used to
feel to oar bare feet along about this
time Of year.
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1922-05-25

The trouble with being an amateur
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1922-05-25


1t seemed that when Rastus and
Sam died they took different routes;
so when the latter got to heaven he
called Rastus on the phone. "Ras-
tus," he said, chow yo' like it down
thar" "Oh, boy! Dis here am some
place." replied Rastus. "All we has
ter do is to wear a red suit wild horns
an cherry now an den shovel some
coal on de fire. We don't work no
more dan two hours out OBJ de "a
down here. But tell me, Sam, how is
it with you up yonder?" "Mah good
ness! We has to git up at fo' o'clock
in de mawning' and gathah in de
stahs; den we has to haul in de moon
and hang out de sun. Den we has
ter roll de clouds aroun' all day long"
"But, Sam, how comes it yo' has ter
work so hard?" "Well, to tell de
trvf, Rastus, we's kim O. short of help
up here"
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1922-05-25

Zero hour" is that time when the
last quart Of cherries has come up
from the basement and the new crop
is not ripe on the trees.
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1922-05-25

NOTICE TO SUBSCRIBERS
Look ct the printed label on your
papey. The date thereon shows when
H. subscription expires. Forward
your money In ampls tms for renewal
Netiee date on label carefully, and u
not correct, please notify u 1t once.
Subscribers desiring the address Of
their pkper changed please state In
their communication both the OLD
and NEW address.
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1922-05-25

A sure remedy for indigestion is to
work your stomach less and your lawn
mower.
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1922-05-25

A deacon in the church had been
quite feeble all spring as result of
an attack of the flu during the winter
months. A good sister sent him a
toothsome gelatine concoction covered
with whipped cream to tempt his an
petite. The woman's temperance
scruples had yielded to the culinary
art and the whipped cream was fla
vored with dash of home made wine.
The deaeon's son was unable to resist
asking for taste. He smacked his
lips and remarked: Mrs. Blanks
COW may have been dry last summer,
but she certainly has gone wet this
spring"
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1922-05-25

Go down the street carrying fish,
ing pole ut this time of year, and ev-
erybody you meet will ask you if you
are going fishing.
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1922-05-25

We refuse to believe in the Darwin
theory because no monkey can screw
its face up to look like that Of = man
who il shaving.