Great Falls tribune. [volume] (Great Falls, Mont.) 1921-current, 1922-12-05
My
X4 PROBLEMS
Adele Garrison's
New Phase off,
REVELATIONS
OF WIFE
WHAT UNDERWOOD SUGGESTED
IN ANALYZING MADGE
AND DlCKY.

/ had no retort to make TO Harry
Underwood's mirthful assertion that
| was like all other women, ready to
flare up in defense of my husband
no matter how badly he had treated
me.
Indeed, too conscious was / of the
fact that there was more than a grain
of truth in his absurdity to dispute
his statement, even If ! had wished
to continue the undignified dispute.
That ! had dragged Lillian's name
into the controversy was another mat
ter of keen regret to nae. Why /
asked myself scathingly, didn't ] re-
member Harry Underwood's penchant
for teasing, and leave his sally I'M
answered.
But there was no use mulling over
what I might have left unsaid. And
| there was no recourse for me except
silence, which, / am afraid, was dis
tinctly sullen. Harry Underwood,
however, lost no time in breaking into
Look here, old dear" he said sud
denly sober, Tets get this thing
straight. You think I'm the devil re
proving sin because I'm scoring
lDicky on account of this performance
when my own record concerning Lii
isn't all to the balmy. Well, in one
way you're probably right, I'm not
hanging any Japanese lanterns on
myself for constancy or decency or
any other of the domestic virtues,
but you've got to remember this
He paused as if choosing his words,
and ! watched him, fascinated by an
expression Of sincerity that sat oddly
upon his usually hooking face.
"Can | Ever Forget?"
'LiIl and l." he resumed slowly,
"were two battered hulks drifting
downstream when we jostled each
other. and decided to drift together
for company. I'm not denying that
| was infinitely the more battered of
the two, and that Lii made a mighty
poor bargain. But, remember, that
she was a mature, experienced WON
ana divorcee to boot-when she
picked me off the lemon tree, and
she did it with her eyes fully open
} to the fact that | was over-ripe and
likely to spoil on her hands. Il was
t prepared for anything | might do, and
. ike the thoroughbred she is, she
done. But the fact remains that she
married me knowing exactly what
: she was doing, while you-'
/: He broke off abruptly. and into his
eyes flashed the old inscrutable ex-
preston which always compels me to
turn my own eyes away from his in q
confusion which maddens me.
"Can I ever forget" he began again
after a long pause, "the first night
Z, ever saw you? 1t was in the theater,
D just a few weeks after you were mar
ried. The Dickybird introduced you
5 to Lii and me. strutting like 4 young
L 49, $3.50 ~ Ita farEr
: BARNARD fight. I expected to hear him
t crow every second. And, by George, |
didn't blame him when you lifted those
: lamps of yours and looked up at me
II was like looking INTO deep pools OF
) water where the sunlight is trying e
chase the shadows away.
e Madqe Is Amused.
"Not that you turned any sunlight
. in my direction he smiled. you
might have been Galatea before
what's-his-namc-kissed her, or al
angel floating around on a fleecy cloud
for any warming up you did toWaro
me. You didn't like Lii or me one
little bit. and while you did the cordia
10 Lii because you were afraid the
3 Dickybird might think you were jeal
GUS, you didn't have to be nice TO me
and my hand is frozen yet from the icJ
mitt you handed me-"
His voice trailed off into silence
and / realized that for a second or tive
he was actually lost in the remini
scence of that Iong-past time. which
| remembered as viyidly as he. Ihel
h he spoke again. more briskly.
but I'm getting away from my sub
IL iect. C~onfound you. I always get of
70 my trolley when you're around. Here!
the point. The Dicky-bird swept yot
off your feet, married you after {
whirlwind wooing, and you had abou
az much experience Of the world, 0
" men and Of what you might get NJ
against as a tame white rabbit. TIL
Dicky-bird ought to be on his knees
Of thanking his particular little joss tina
i. he ever was allowed to cop you out
instead Of philandering around Will
some other girl. If the fates coul'
only have fixed it So you could hav'
married me, now"
s. But the image of Harry Underwood
at ns u possibly constant husband was 70
much for me, and laughed unre
STRANGELY.
Next-The astonishing facts Harr,
=, Underwood calmly disclosed TO Madge