The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-06-06
Chr Tnathatnttr
LIKE CHARrTY-AND RS GRANITE
PROTOTYPESn COVERS A
MULTITUDE OF SINS.

III MULTITUDE OF SINS.
TURNING the colyum upside down Gin m.
To- s. we begin by saying there are seventeen
reasons why we don't expect to get out much
OF coIyum today.
The first reason is that we haven't any
thoughts worth putting in colyum-and the
other sixteen reasons don't matter.
IN the first place are jealous OF the
Gentleman of the Adjacent Columns. Early
yesterday morning he seized an az. demolished
the steel shackles that bound him to his desk
and merrily went a-fivvering out on the coun-
try roads with the Gentleman Who Cares for
Country Circulation. For two cents Tor less)
we'd go out and break our arm again-as we
did last year-so that we might join T. G. W.
C. (. C. C. in his gasoline peregrinations-
Eheu. life is just one longing after another,
as the poet says; or, rather, as the poet is
about to say.
VAIN LONGNGS.
When<1 feel the first faint breezes of the
restless spirit grips and holds my soul;
Then vain wishes come a-thronging and I'm
filed with utter longing
To go somewhere and WELD fshin pole.
IT'S then wish-not for million dollars;
Possession of that much would be bore
No, I'd like as many shekels as 1 used to have
of freckles-
Just that; I'd have no need for any more.
All! then would desert this musty Office
And HE me up among the northern pines;
Then longer sad and solemn would type
a witless column
And pad it out with so-called rhythmic lines.
Nc longer would 1 seek elusive wheezes,
Nor seat my prudish readers on a tack
If had little money (gosh. that line is really
funnyD
I'd leave this colyum prone upon its back!
STILL, (as someone so aptly remarked
was it Mencken? or Nathan? or perhaps Shawl
there is balm in Gilead Lacking the where
withal TO transport to the north woods
may may is the wordD find a suitable subst-
tute right near our front door. Frinstance:
What asks the charmingly original press
agent of Your Street Car System, is so rare
as a day in June?-the weather seldom too
hot or too cool-the sun bright-all out of
doors fresh. green and inviting Enjoy such
days to the utmostwhile they last. Depend
on the street cars to do their part to take you,
your family and your friends for a real outing
tomorrow at the low cost of nickel ride
with an Identification Card Try them trip
in them will convince you.
What, we ask you. could be sweeter? What
indeed! Already the sun OF anticipation
begins TO break through our clouds OF financial
gloom What care we for money? Nothing
That is, not much. . Well we
our right arm.
The Marathon Mourners.
From The Argus
Although MI. Aronson had not lived in
Rock Island, he had many friends in this
vicinity who mourn in state at the Ester
dahl chapel, the last IS months.
SENATOR WATSON (of Indiana) saws Re
publican senate leaders have determined to
explain and defend the administration tariff
bill in general debate. And now in every senate
Office begins the business of busting off the
plattudes and bromides and trotting out the
Astrological gems and split in1nitives for exer-
else; not to mention the mang1ed mixed
metaphors.
MORE JOBS FOR MR. DAVIS, THE !
FINANCIAL HERCULES
Dear Mac: While Arthur Davis is admitting
that he is able financially to handle anything.
may ADD TO your own Incompatible list of
the following:
Rock Islands new hotel
Davenports metropolitan ambitions
The wifes millinery bills.
My own vacation trip.
New coach and engine for r. l. Southern
More billboards for downtown section
O. D. K
YOUNG man of New Holland, ILL., trav-
eling in an automobile with four companions
lied from the effects of drinking white mule"
ana number of persons with damp reasoning
powers will blame prohibition instead of the L
dlocy OF the man who drank the stuff
Now We Understand Our Affection; Our
Dads Name Was Sam.
From the A p mail
Marshall, Ark.-William, Steen of this
town always thought his Christian name
was too common. So when he married
he decided to give romance to the names
OF his children. Today Bill" has nine
ntte boys, and their names follow:
Bosco, Tasco, Lasco. Cicero Marvillo
Rosco Otto, Woodrow and Vanzo
The father says the names rhyme,
sound like music, make poetry and ex
press individuality and distinction
NOW" says an Argus headline. dolly