The Birmingham age-herald., 1922-04-25

HIS Ae01bog HG navy 4GN P will make a winning pitcher in { Anyway, he could never have a Quack as president of the outf a Drake on the roster.
 Colonel Quack and Cappy Rick have returned from their fishing trip. They spent week with hook and line, and appeasing ap- petites.
 The difference between a fish erman and an illiterate is:
 One bnits hook, and the other hates n book.
 Life for that? Nope, deathi Lefty James, pitcher, has been sold to the Crackers by the Pel- jeans. Jesse and Frank are still umpiring.
 The subconscIous
 An umps lamped chicken in the stands and immediately yell- ed fowl"
 sno Use; 'Twon't Rhyme. We had an infield malady
 And Moley couldn't cure it. Until the Pirates heard his plea And shipped down Stuffy Ste-
 warr.
 Our Own Definitions Bull fight-word battle.
 
 At that, I know two men who arc sdWcrooked, when they play golf the match Is never all square. My favorite bootlegger had a statement in his hand Mountain dew bill, eh wot?
 When Mir. Clarke wns hitting nbOut 63s in the first few games many fans persisted in referring to him as Slump Clarke.
 A Woman's Answer I know not why it is that way.
 But Wednesday is the day for
 Straws;
 seek to find the reason why.
 The echo answers just be-
 cause"
 Schmidtten
 Walter Schmidt, q holdout, iB now held out. Uncle Walt de- manded that the Pittsburg club give him contract calling for ten thousand Vulcans year for three years. They offered him $500 for one year. For ten days he refused to sign, and then an automatic suspension caught him for strangle hold. Slow waits, He'll now have ot go before the High Commissioner. Jedge Lam dis, before he can get reinstated. Tn the meantime John Beverly Gooch is catching the best base ball that ever has been caught and is showing no mercy to Ma tional league pitching.
 Joe Beckett probably never has fully recovered from the blow Carp dealt him. Joe says he wants to fight Dempsey. Is there an alienist in the audience.
 Somebody left k out of Joe's name. anyway. It should be pIac- ed between the and c.
 Senator Milt Reed is now with the Lookouts, holding down the short field. Wingfield was bad enough at short. but Milton's verse.
 The Barometer shows that Mo- bile has great ball club.
 Squash Squnshed
 Hub Perdue sued the Nashville ball club for back pay and lost. Judge Landis probably figured
  costly at any price
 Phil Morrison is an ambidext- rous hitter. He can strike out from either side of the plate. Phil crossed 'em all up in Mobile Sun day and hit one over the fence. It is still 25 days until the. Bambinograph will start ticking. A birdie in the cup is worth three in the imagination.
 Two Good Cards
 New Orleans and Birmingham fight fans are in for two classy entertainments Thursday night. Tn our own dear Ham Patsy McMahon and Red Herring will stage the second battle of the Marne. Down in New Orleans Billy Miske and Martin Burke will be mixing mitts.
 Umpires talk back to pitchers because, ms rule, they know pitchers can't hit.
 Battling Kelly, the pug, has hopped from the ring into min strelsy. The battler probably fig ured that it was better to have his face black all over than just a black eye or so.
 Babe Ruth must have thrown a couple of spasms when Gloomy Gus Williams of the Brown hit three homers Saturday. Bambino probably felt that Gus was steal ing his thunder.
 Meyers the Tourist
 Gil Meyers, popular Central High athlete coach, has changed Jobs again. He was sold yester- day by the Pelicans to Nashville. This makes three outfits Sandy has caught for in the Southern loop. He started with Memphis, then went to New Orleans, and now he's with Nashville.
 Very Bad, Eddie
 When the Reds star outfielder failed to agree to terms. Judge