The Washington herald., 1922-08-30
For the Generals Joke Book.

todon and tn dinosaur have wallowed in
the fetd swamps of infinite space seeking
bodies. They lived the earth before Eve and
Adam into the Garden OF Eden. They made
war each other and nature made them.
They perished. giving way to a order in the
evolution OF life At last they have found their
new bodies. For these prehistoric reptiles the
morning OF resurrection is at hand. Once more
they the earth
This is bit fanciful, perhaps. 1t is suggested
by the that a French tank corps regiment in
summer training has hit upon the novel idea OF rig
ging up the monsters of twentieth century to
look like of the ancient animals whose bones
now repose in the show rooms of the National
Museum.
The dinosaur, presume. almost mind
less creature He lacked either the instinct the
intelligence to adjust himself changing cond-
tions. He conspicuous, in his time
by his size, ferocity and horrible appearance
What better body could he have picked. after his
long wanderings than army tank? Here all
his old characteristics have leeway assert them
selves. In such body he be comfortable.
Did these French soldiers hit upon the idea
purely by grotesque chance? Or were they guided
by superior intelligence which is turning the
wheels OF evolution in a circle-from the dinosaur
to man and from to the dinosaur again? 1t
does require vivid imagination to bridge the
gap OF thousand centuries during tank corps
exhibition at Camp Meade-to deafen ones ears
to the chug of the motors and blind ones eyes
obvious steel and iron construction and to see
instead herd of prehistoric reptiles advancing in
formation field and hill, through swamp and
underbrush. That the vision of
less Frenchman this summer
All the armies engaged in the world war were
composed of brave men-men who recognized the
immediate probability OF death and who made it
laughing matter. These stood firm under
hailstorms OF machine-gun bullets They kept their
faces the front when a solid line of bayonets
came towards them, the gltterng against the
steel blades.
What would any of them have done, however,
ii they had the fields not moving line
OF steel but advancing troop OF cavalry mounted
upon plesiosauri> They would, OF course, have
They did not fear death when it came from instru-
ments of the earth with which they were familiar,
but when there touch of the supernatural
about the threat the situation different.
This French soldier. who is genius and should
be made field marshal if he has the capacity to
duplicate such ideas very frequently, could have
put to flight alone ten German regiments if his
present inspiration had to him during
days. Clever camouflage would have turned the
trick
We have often wondered. in fact, why none OF
the contending armies apparently made any effort
to take advantage OF their strongest allythe super
stition OF their opponents The nation is proud Of
the record OF American doughboys We all know
that they did not retreat before German artillery
or German infantry. 1t is reasonable to suppose,
however. that they would have run like frightened
rabbits from a regiment of German ghosts. Fortu-
nately, Mr.. Ludendorff thought of this idea
Some skillfu German opticians cooperating with
some INSCRIPTIONS German spirituasts might have
produced the desired illusion. What panic it
might have caused in the blue enchantment of the
French countryside the weird platoons moved
forward, There is another idea which did not occur
to Mr. Ludendorf and to which our unknown
French soldier is welcome if it will help him on
the road to a fled marshars rank This was sug-
gested at the Washington Zoo the other day. Who
, has watched the serpent cage without a shver of
horror at the thought OF being caught in the Shiny
icoils of the boa constructor bitten by the dia-
imond-headed adder? Why does not the War
j department send an expedition to the jungles of
Africa South America to capture few thou
sand of these reptiles? Then they might be put
through oi training aro a; a cl1,ical
moment. released in front of the enemy.
/ Would not the bravest company in the United
States infantry take their heels like scared ante
lopes if they hundred boa constructors let
loose among them? 1t is one thing to think of
death from bayonets, or bullets, gas, or liquid
FIRE 1t is another thing entirely to think of death
in the loathsome, horrible grip of giant serpent
The London conference has failed. Germany
is near collapse. France and Great Britain are at
each others throats. The world has come not one
step nearer permanent peace during the four years
since the armstice. Prospects excellent for
anothefwar. We may as well be prepared.
All this is written merely as a suggestion of
some of the ways of winning victories which
may be IN vogue during this next war.
1t is all very crazy, Of course But before the