The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-06-17
Chr Tnn1hstnttp
| LIKE CHARrTY-AND IT'S GRANITE |
PROTOTyPES-IT COVERS n
| MULTITUDE OF SINS.

APOLOGIES to LIE Moqueur are in order.
That was an excellent colyum we printed yes
terday We can say SO without rear OF oeing
cause we didn't write it LIE Moqueur was the
author; but the signature was overlooked, botn
by Bill our Incompatible Compositor, and us,
LIE Moo will pardon the oversight. we trust
SOME HOT TIPS ON CoLYUMING.
Dear Mac: With resp to your plant oewan-
ing the fact that the vox contriouh mas OWN
died to a mere whisper, let tne aucnor SUD-
NIT few Suggestions
AS a start, the author feels as though he
could act as seventh assistant edltor OF Inc
Tombstone Information Bureau. should the
clientele have a. problem that vexes they nave
only TO air it in the column to receive scrupu-
lous attention.
Permit the author also to suggest Tomb
stone Health Talks. The author can recall
many times when he has chosen TO follow
certain policy not knowing whether his course
was the healthy one Psychology, thought by
some to be allied to the matter of health, comes
under this department and the author feels that
Red, the original author, can, from the pro-
fundity of a. draft-age sagacity and experience,
successfully administer here with the coIlaoo-
ration OF MIR. Heilmann.
Before proceeding Mac, l ask you in my
hest international e. S. English: whointhehell
cares about those bursts of inchoate philosophy
o. Khayyam soliloquies-and vaporous remfn-
iscences? 1 would like TO see Reds descrlp-
ton of the human nature that crowded river
steamer evening last week Perhaps we
can as the introduction to Health Talks, get
an eyewitness summation la Henry Cabot
Lodge of that evening of happers, 4. M S,
1esh-co1ored hose, and teeth like butchers I'm
gernails. Nowhere is a couple of ideas with
which to start We ought also to have Daily
Short Story-but not daily-and then, when
all this fails, Mac, there is yet the poetry mill
operating in Cedar Rapids, and the industrious
lie Moqueur-I thought for awhile there were
two of him-still survives, let US hope.
AS for you. Mac, you are the harpinsest chap
on verbs l have ever heard; consequently you
are to have charge OF Solecistics and the Split
Infnitive Department. You know. had never
an occasion to really learn just what was
split infnitive until you directed my attention
TO that evil.
While you milling this over some more
ideas may come TO me and you shall have them
the moment they terminate
SCAMOZZPS frank confession about split
infnitives calls for another. Strange 1t may
seem lsic) we have not been always on speak
ing terms with split infnitive. On second
thought speaking terms" is not the better
way to express it; not. at least, in that
We used to cuddle split infinitives to our buzz
yum unaware of the fact that they are literary
asps. Now we scotch one wherever 1t dares TO
raise its ugly head
1T seems strange to that SO many school
teachers seem not to be acquainted with the
deadly split ihfnitive. Not long ago we
heard of former school principal who took
the position that splitting infnitives was
writer's choice" or writers license. Odd
how they get that way. At home have
book OF poems and stories written by New
York school children The volume was pub
ltshed about 25 or 80 years ago and edited
by school superintendent whose name we
don't recall close study of that volume
would be revelation to many who labor under
the delusion that they the English language
as medium for written expression. We say
wv ten m
to pardon the verbal atrocities of nine-tenths
of the American people. (Were the guiltiest Of
the lott But when one writes one should
write right. Right?
RECURRING to split infnitives Otis the
fondest subject we are of We hold the belief
that so per cent of the press correspondents,
20 per cent of the by line" writers and an
uncertain per cent of editorial writer's recog-
nize a split inhnitive about as readily as they
can explain the Einstein theory Of RELATIVELY.
FOoTNoTING the space-annihiIating acros
tic yesterday LIE Moo. said he wasn't SO anx-
lous to be educational" as he was TO gain time
ard he didn't believe he had done either Well
concede there was nothing educational in SPELL
ing minimum" "m-i-n-u-m-u-m"
AS far as we have gone We are prepared
to swear that camp life is 20 degrees below
the zero of pleasurable existence We had in
tended to chronicle our recent land still con-
unulng) narrowing experiences in a Diary of
T. B. A."-but we haven't had the heart
to write it. Still, for the good of the soul of
our camp landlord think it should be writ
ten. We feel that he ought to know what he
VIII have to answer for in the hereafter
HOLD THE PRESSES! LIE MOO. WANTS TO
REGISTER A KICK
Dear Mac; My column. my poor, poor
column!
There was no in" in catch up in his arms"
and was SO sure that wrote it "honin' right
regular for the month of June"-which would
have remeded that new and peculiar rendition
OF the word effort. 1 KNOW l erased that
particular line once. though perhaps. with nv
usual presence of mind l wrote the same one
in again
A horrible thought comes to me! What if
having seen these two obviously unintentionai
errors, int ltional critics. thinking that the in
tentioneify obvious errors are obviously unin-
tentlonai, become obviously, erroneously ana
Intentionally attentive?
My poor, etc, niInportei lie MOO
H0 HUM.
Gone are the days when the waltz and the
two-step e
Recdened the cheek of the virtuous maid
Gone are the days when SO much as her instan
None but the brazenest hussy displayed
TSF7oTa