davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
New-York tribune., 1922-08-06

feasting places is the ancient burial ground
at Grassy Hill. The old table gravestones,
with adjacent mounds of less important people,
offer ideal facilities in matters Of service, etc,
and I like to think that the old worthless who
sleep beneath the sod approve of my method
of obeying the Biblical injunction, Eat, drink
and be merry, for tomorrow We die" But, as
I say, this prediction of mine has met with
no success whatsoever, and when / picnic at
Grassy Hill l am forced to do so alone.
The important thing, then, to remember is
that there is no one spot which combines all
the qualities one would wish for. An equally
important corolary is the desirability of ac-
cepting whatever spot is decided upon and
making the most Of it. What might have been
perfect picnic is frequently spoiled by the
irreconcilable attitude of some of the partici-
pants who have been overruled. They simply
refuse to have good time and sit aloof, scorn-
full of their surroundings, geographic and
human. This is the attitude which my eldest
New-York tribune., 1922-08-06

the retired bartender. II amt no
prohbitionist, but it seems like a country
where children have to be fed by foreigners
oughta be able to find better place for it's
rye an potatoes than distilleries.
"f it was whisky, now, there'd be some
sense to it, but these foreign drinks like vodka
an slivowitz an such-like, don't do healthy
mans stumnnick no good an what'H happen to
what's left O. them Russian stummicks is goin'
to be crime.
1T looks to me like them Bolshevikis that's
runnin' things over there had got pretty hard
up an was out now to get whatever real money
there was left in the country. I seen some
where that they thought there was still several
million gold rubles tucked away in peasants
socks buried in the cellars of them that
didn't wear socks.
From all I hear, there's only two things
that'u make some Russians ante up real gen
erous. One is a priest an the other is vodka.
The Bolshevikis passed up the priests quite
some time ago an now ali they got to rely on
in emptying socks an cellar safe deposit vaults
is vodka
1T will be a government business, prob1y,
just like when the Gar was runnin' things, an
HI bet 1t won't be near SO good booze, neither.
Every time poor farmer steps up to the bar
an slaps down seventeen or eighteen million
rubles an asks fer shot of vodka, about fif-
teen or sixteen million o them rubles is goin'
to the government an only about one million to
the house.
Il wouldn't advise no one to open up in
Russia with only Bolshcvik vodka on tap, even
If the people was crazy fer it. There won't be
no 5bo b,,ri 49,,
coke, an not near so much profit. It's gon' to
be almost as poor business proposition as
counterfeitin' would be-government competi-
tons goin' to be too strong.
''The upifters used to lay into the Car
pretty strong about the vodka business an I'm
wonderin' what they'll say now that the Boil
shevikis are goin to go .sto the business
IF the Bolshevikis get the upIifters down
on EN- it'll make it pretty near unanimous, be-
cause l see where even Gene Debs wrote to
Lenine little while ago tellin him he oughta
go little easier on the execution business.
1T don't seerl to make no difference to the
Bolshevikis, though, whether they're popular
or not. You hear that there's mighty few Rus
slams is for 'em an as fast as we can ship over
Americans that was hollerin' for 'em, they get
converted to anti-Bolshevism, but the Bolshe-
vikis keep right on runnin' things lust the
same.
But this vodka business begins to look like
they was gettin' kinda weak in the knees. You
take an I'LL a man up with vodka an you can't
tell what he's liable to 90. I've seen Russian
sailors come into the old place on Tenth Avenue
with a vodka bun on an sometimes they'd Just
flop down like sack of potatoes an go to
sleep an sometimes they'd want to tear the
bar up by the roots.
"None of 'em ever did it on account of the
nightstick the boss kept under the beer pump
an suppose them Bolshevikis figure the army
Is their nightstick. But once vodka is on sale
the army is goin' to get its share an prob'ly
more. too, an you cant put no confidence in q
1ightstick that's wobbly with vodka
New-York tribune., 1922-08-06

Interruptions, one may
understand the SINGER
ity and Representatives,
Of his convictions. He
actually suffers for his
religion.
Several years ago he
was lured on a picnic.
Among his other engag-
ing propensities is a
thorough appreciation
Of feminine loveliness,
a gift which medical
men naturally acquire
and in the exercise of
which they show, I must
admit, rare tact and
worthiness. The picnic
in question was q birth
day affair in honor Of
q beauteous lady whose
smiles induced my
neighbor, against his
better judgment, to for
sake his cool dining
room and comfortable
armchair for a pine
grove and a pine plank.
What misery was his!
The gods of the forest
sensed him for an inter
loper. Gnats stung him;
mosquitoes bit him; ants
annoyed him. Twigs
fell into his ginger ale,
leaves into his salad.
New-York tribune., 1922-08-06
THE ABSURD
MR.. IRVING
Continued from page fonrj

could make use Of for e chase scene-not s,.-
Ford. And don't go raising your hand and
starting to tell me that you don't know VII,
Ford IS. Take that party scene at the hons 4
old Bait Van Tassel. It ought TO be isz,a,
up lot. Put in good live orchestra Of syn.
ccpators and have little real jigging around
Have little bootleg circulated and Brou
Rones's college boys getting rough. That
give a chance for the schoolmaster to inter.
tere and save Katrina Van Tassel from Brcrs
drunken attentions. If the schoolmasers
going to be the central figure he's got to b
more sympathetic. He must be the sort sas:
one Of our handsome leading men can psy
some actor with good profile and fns
pair of eyes. You know the sort Of ehas
mean-the kind that has to have two ssas
tarles TO open his personal mail"
The shade of Washington Irving passed ID
hand YEARLY across its brow.
"Of course, these suggestions are rads b
kindly spirit" went on the scenarist HFs
just giving you few Of the suggestions thf
l know will be handed to me before foot 4
celiuloid is shot. The real changes viii cons
when the rest of the gang gets busy. unds
stand Blankenship is going TO be the direct.
and he can make more changes, and with ls
reason, than the average railroad makes I'd
local timetable. But if we get some Of tbs
switches made in advance it'll save Us 10. "a
backing and filing later on. know
what the studio gangs going TO say. Esr
Ing to say with one voice that this stor {
yours can be made into a popular ai'E W
forget all that you've written, Mr.. Washer
ton, and lay things out according to mods'
ideas Wait till you hear all the Inharnasr
Gus Blacksmiths going together over you
story, and then you'll thank me for sny "
vance tips I can give you about whats %
done to appeal to the movie fans Of bosn ssAs
and all ages Another thing, Mr.. Nasnas
ton, that you ought to study up on right ne
is how to keep the censors guessing ns
more than you have
81 don't understand what you mean Ds =
censors.''
II mean that you're too stand-ofiish u ~ q
love interest. There's hardly chance i@
much as one clinch for final fade-out p''ss
What you want TO do is to slide IN sons s's
that sort of skid along on thin ice. Nc
fix UP some that will pass the censors II ~ 4
sylvania and Kansas, where they peaI v
hard from moral angle. And then w &
fix up another line for the states that afs -
liberal. For instance, we could have
bathing beauties in the creek under the S@~
Hollow bridge. II you'n drop IN sgaD q.
can fix up something that will airaess
past the studio crowd as writ -
But the shade of Irving had leapeo '1's s.
current of air created by the electro go 6, b
disappeared out of the window, with Dor
in the manner Of its going to indlcass
return visit was contemplated.
New-York tribune., 1922-08-06

NX I Z NEVER knew there were so many
wv important people in the world-let
alone our own town-till we told a
local real estate agent that we'd
rent our house for the summer if we could get
enough money for it.
Before that we had Supposed that people
who rented small houses for the summer were
just people, good deal like us-used to plain
living and accustomed to struggle along some
now or other with only three bathrooms and
a two-car garage.
But people aren't that way at ALL You'd
never imagine what hardship it is to them to
40 without private dressing rooms and sleep
ing porch for every member of the family and
an electric fan in each room and the kind of
1cebox that doesn't have any ice in it. but
keeps itself cold by electricity
Had we imagined for a minute that renters
were that way we wouldn't have said anv.
thing to the real estate agent. Speaking tn
hlm didn't do US any good, anyway. for after
three days we got mad and-but the best wav
is to tell you all about it.
Mrs. Lexington Throcknorton and ho,
daughter, Ermengarde, and her little dop Tin
rang were the first people that called.
We thought their call would he brief sou 49,
soon as Mrs. Throckmorton got into +ba ha11
she tilted her nose slightly and ,yb;snanas
hoarsely to her daughter:
1T looks like dingy little hole to me
But she decided to look around the d;nrr
1ieele hoie. Wnen she got as far as the living
room she turned once more to her offspring
ana observed: some people are able to en-
0ure anything! feel as if were Summing
New-York tribune., 1922-08-06

terials as corncobs,
watermelon rinds and
chicken bones, as well
as highly infammable
potato chips and paper
napkins. But / have
always felt that Deans
NJ ills was self-con-
scious. 7 h G stone
tables and chairs have
a way of crying silently
II am quaint - which
repels me. I have
never been able to un-
derstand the picnickers
who pull up their cars
on the side of a busy
highway, where in the
glaring sunshine they
proceed to toss their
egg shells into the path
Of passing motorists.
This is a pathetically
public escape from
town life, but perhaps
they are lacking in ex-
perience-they are but
picnickers in the MAX
ing. At any rate, I do
not find fault with
them, for | have made
choices Of my own
which have not met
with a cordial reception.
For instance, one Of
my favorite out-of-door
New-York tribune., 1922-08-06

fully read the closing prices Of Saturdays
stock market. The lakeside glade at Deans
Mills has its sophisticated charm. Stone tables
and chairs have been arranged by a local viii
lage park commission; there is even rubble-
stone incinerator, both esthetic and efficient,
which will speedily consume such resistant ma
New-York tribune., 1922-08-06

way into the discourse with his cake and cater
pillar episode, but we have had so many picnics
since then that "his stuff is cold," to use a
vulgar dramatic expression.
With this knowledge porn of long experience,
atavistic and actual, namely, that there is no
road to happiness save by suffering, we may
New-York tribune., 1922-08-06

In other words, Happinesss crown of happi-
ness is in remembering unhappy things. Have
we not, all of us, sat in gatherings of our
friends who screamed with delight over the
hideous inconvenience and contretemps of pre-
vious experiences? Are not the most Joyous
New-York tribune., 1922-08-06

from red ants in the butter to sand feas in
the salad. Nothing will pry him from his
piazza. Considering the fact that he is doc
tor of high repute and by his housekeeping
propensites he is thus exposed to innumerable
long-distance telephone calls and holiday
New-York tribune., 1922-08-06
MARTY'S VIEWS
ON VODKA
By Robert B. Peck

= SEE where Russia is goin to lay offa
prohibition an put vodka on sale
y again." remarked Marty Mcmahon,
New-York tribune., 1922-08-06

E NEVER knew there were so many
important people in the world-let
alone our own town-till we told a
The producers news., 1922-11-03

How much Of this money has gone into the graft pool OF
the old mighty hard this time, but 1t
will undoubtedly be uneared in time because at this time the
County shows that all the fixed assets it has of roads,
bridges bridge supplies tools and machinery amount only two
hundred nnethree thousand eight hundred nnettwo dollars
and cents What has become Of the balance SEVEN
HUNDRED NINETY-FOUR THOUSAND EIGHT HUNDRED
|THiRTY-THREE DOLLARS AND FIFTY-THREE CENTS. It's
mighty turn vast depreciation but this
ing too Tar shows enormous waste well nefcency
Rather than spend such this have
the original prairie trails The the
trunk roads have miles of prairie trails travel before they
get roads which many
these good roads the Surveyor did less travelling Is cents
per mile would reduce these depreciation items good
thousand dollars and do not hesitate that these trips
more for pleasure than business and then looks like speed
oneer registers miles than actually travelled bac
The above figures does not include the and bridges
this county had previous to its creation Sheridan County
It averages $500 day if estimate that all road
of each year. - - 81.
There kick the Of building the fault
rs with the spending of such huge the build
ing people have spent plenty of it. but where
the roads, 10
The producers news., 1922-11-03

American and go TO the polls and vote,
aad vote your ticket straight-vote
for those who are endorsed by your
chosen delegates. The present Off
GERS have begun to put our county
government on its feet again. Put
them back SO that the good work can
be continued. If you should have a
personal feeling against some candi-
date don't let that hinder your good
Judgment in voting for hin1-for only
by solidarity ond organization can we
win.
Lastly, I thank you for the splendid
cooperation you all have given to my
office and [ shall work with pleasure
the rest Of my term.
Fraternally yours,
VIM MOE,
County Superintendent of Schools
The producers news., 1922-11-03

contract or agreement that has cost
the farmers of Sheridan county many
thousand dollars in damages, ana
asked what action he was going to
take in the premises, he said: "My
hands are tied"
Attorney General Ford himself,
prepared pleadings or charges for an
custer against the commissioners
based or the above contract and other
illegal actions, and sent the same to
Mr.. Gunther, instructing him to sign
and proceed, btJ Nj. Gunther refused
to sign. Yet Mr.. Gunther says, "I
have tried to be honest..''
Mr.. Gunther vas honest alright.
He was honest With the "oid gang, "
but not with the farmers and tax
payers of. Sheridan county.
Do you, Mr. Fa.7aer ard Taxpayer,
want 10 return to the conditions exist
ing before the Farmers Administration
took over the County Government =
II you don't then vote the farmers
tlckct and vote it straight.
The producers news., 1922-11-03
DOOLEY

Rodney Salisbury was here on bust
ness Saturday
English services were held at the
church Sunday evening.
The Nonpartisan Rally was held
at the Stenseth Hall Saturday even
ing. A good crowd was in attendance.
N. F. Loucks has taken over the
handling Of the Continental Oil Sta
10 nhere, Ed Estes having resigned.
Ed. Estes disposed of his dray busi-
ness last week to Halvor Hanson,
who took charge November 1st. The
former will move to another location.
J. B. Chandler moved into his new
building the forepert of the week.
A large number from here attended
the Ted Curtin sale Monday A good
crowd was in attendance.
Mrs. Harry Burnham is assisting
as clerk at the Kelly Merantile Co.
store these days. =
Some people have the habit Of jump
ing at conclusions without an appar-
en- reason, which of course is only
an injury to themselves word to
the wise is sufficient.
Sven Soderquist was in town last
Wednesday on bsuiness.
Robt. Davidson was in town last
week on business.
Jack Boyd. purchased a bunch of
cattle last week from Mckee of Plen-
tywood Jack believes in mixed farm
ing.
Neils Jensen transacted business
here last week.
The Ladies' Aid served supper at
the church Thursday evening of last
week to a far sized crowd.
Harry Burnham was off duty last
week owing to quinsy. Raish of Out
look took his place at the. chair.
Messrs. Bruvold and Hanson mot
ored up from Comertown last We'd
nesday.
VIM. RAIDER, RAYMOND banker, NOV
ed the safe out of the Monarch office
here last week.
Harold Hooper was in town last
Thursday.
Jack Roach of Comertown was here
on business last Thursday. Mr.. Roach
is disposing of his farming outfit, hav-
ing decided to quit farming. Just
where he will locate he doesn't know
at this writing.
Last Thursday the school children
were out selling. hearts ON which We're
written the words sNtHave a Heart
and help Child to Find a Home" for
the Chiidren's home and had excellent
success.
The producers news., 1922-11-03

This is Photographic reproduction
of the contract signed by the COM
missioners.
It was made between the Board of
County Comissioners of Sheridan
county and the Montana & Dakota
Elevator Company.
This occurred in the spring of 1918.
The Board of County Commissioners
had purchased over two hundred
thousand bushels of foul seed grain
from the above company, and that
company was delivering the same to
the destitute farmers of. Sheridan
county, to plant with, to help win the
war.
Oh, such a deed!
The pure seed law of the state of
Montana is as follows: According TO
q S. Standards: Purity 80 per cent
az to weed seed content and absolutely
pure as tc noxious ,veeIs'' as ieared
! tv the weed laws of Montana. V;o-
la'tn +, ov'des penalty See Co,la.
| The ILLEGAL CONTRACT
When Mr.. Gunther was shown this
The producers news., 1922-11-03
Vote For Endorsed
Candidates Says VIM. Moe
Plentywood, Mont.
November 2, 1922.

iC1iGy WUOlt, b.
November 2, 1922.
Charles E. Taylor,
Producers News,
Plentywood, Mont.
Dear Editor:
Many have been asking me why I
d1d not seek denomination and insinu-
ations have been made that I was
sick OF politics. Any self-respec!ine.
man is sick of a great deal of the
vlllalncus slander carried on during
campaign. No, I am ready to car
ry on the fight. | have spent the
greatest part of my life on the farm
and in hard work and I shall never
forget il and shall always feel myself
part of that toiling mass: my svn1-
pathy and future services are with
them
I declined the endorsement for re-
election first because [ Wantsto return
to school and pursue my studies that
i may become more efficient for SER
wee and better my own position in
life, second, because the coInnensa-
ton, for the position is very made
quate compared with superintend-
ent of city schools gets. AS citv sun
erintendent I should get, about $500
per month and as County Superintend-
ent | only get $3.50 per month. This
may be a selfish reason but it is a W.T.
al one for me.
! urge every voter to be a good
The producers news., 1922-11-03

the past week visiting at the Nile B.
Miller and j. NJ. Buchanan homes.
Karl Hoveland of Outlook made a
business call at Uzeepus farm Sat r.
day.
The Lone Tree Ladies' Aid sale at
the Andrew Espen home was we'll at
tended. 1t is reported the ladies
cleared $4,000
Miss Margaret Roach of Conner
town called at the 0. NJ. Lutnes home
Saturday
The Lone Tree territory was we'll
represented at the Skarning Concert
at Westby The people of that COM
munity were especially interested be-
cause the Hanson Bros, who live there
are first cousins of Thorstein Skarn-
ing. All who attended the concert
report themselves we'll pleased.
There have been two prairie fires
at McElroy the past week. The first
one sprang up Tuesday evening some
distance southwest of the station on
the prairie grass. This headed toward
the station. Mr.. and Mrs. S. Bartnes
fought the fire and prevented the
burning of hay or any other property
till the Welch family and Mr.. Amund
son returned from the Skarning con-
cert at Westby, when the flames were
conquered.
The second fire started UP Friday
noon near the elevator house This
one started fast and furiously north
west Very few We're out to fight the
fire at first, so the fire got a good
start Later force came out from
Westby and also from Comertown. A
haystack belonging to Harold Foss
was burned. Everything except the
house on the J. J. McElroy place and
a barn on Oscar Olson's place were
burned. The fire passed Conertown
before it was put out.
The producers news., 1922-11-03
Candidates Endorsed by the
MONPARTISAN LEAGUE
REPUBLICAN, TICKET

State Senator
'HARLES E. TAYLOR, Plentywood
Representatives
(Vote for two) IA
CLAIR STONER, Outlook
=. A. tn. LARSEN, Dagmar
County Commissioner
CHARLES LUNDEEN, Outlook
Sheriff
RODNEY SALISBURY, Raymond
Clerk & Recorder
B. K. O'GRADY, Raymond
County Treasurer
D. J. OLSON, Plentywood
County Assessor ,-..
OLE ASPELUND, Dooley
County Attorney
A. C. ERICKSON, Medicine Lake
County Surveyor
HANS RASMUSSEN, Dagmar
County Coroner
MARTIN S. NELSON, Plentywood
County Supt. of Schools
EMMA CRONE, Raymond
Public Administrator
FL. P. FOSTER, Comertown
Justices of the Peace
Plentywood-Raymond Judicial Twps
(Vote for two)
L. S. OLSON
GEORGE WHEELER
The producers news., 1922-11-03
Here is a twice told tale.

Here is a twice told tale.
1t has appeared in the Producers
News before.
It is the tale of one Of the fouest
deeds on the pages. of the history
of Sheridan county or any other
It is a a, tale Of. contract, solemnly
entered, into by, a. Board of County
Commissioners with an elevator COM
pany, to annul state law governing
the sale Of seed grain and other seeds
in, the State of Montana for the pur-
pose allowing this elevator COM
pany to furnish seed grain full OF
foul seed, contrary TO law, to the
farmers 81. Sheridan county ssrgssssa
What consideration was paid Tor
this foul deed er
This was done when the sons Of the
farmers had gone. to, war and were
The producers news., 1922-11-03
Twice Told ale
, pcoect;o,, Of How the "Od Gang in Sheridan Coun
~ Used TO Do Public Busness-Largely Responsible for
the Seeding of Sheridan County With Noxlous Weeds
) That VIII Take Years to Eradicate ~ sz-.a
no YOU WANT 70 RETURN TO THESE CONDITIONS?

fighting for the honor Of their coun-
try on a foreign soil: when these same
farmers were being urged to raise
food and win the war-they
snished With farmers were being urg-
ed to raise food and win the war-they
were furnished with seed that would
not grow and their farms were be
fouled with weeds. .'4S' &s-,'.-;s.tS.
Was not this act the act of criih-
inals and traitors? ..-.-
I. will be. remembered that. many
farmers refused to take this grain,
because in many instances, there were
more weed seed per btlsheI than there
was. grain.
Because Of this seed, naany farmers
loststhei crops and fnaIIgtheir farms.
Below we print a apiefhre OF. the
contract. zsgs.5 -
The producers news., 1922-11-03
McELROY

Mrs. Fl. P. Hanson has gone to Val
ley City, N. D., for an indefinite stay,
having been called there by the i'll
ness of sister.
Miss Hulda Fosberg finished her
work for the Equity Threshing Co.,
Saturday and returned to her home
at Overland, Sask., the same day. She
has had full charge of the cook car
since her sister Elsie. was called home
earlier.
Mrs. Ed. Buchanan of Outlook spent