davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Democratic banner. (Mt. Vernon, Ohio) 1898-192?, 1922-08-01

this county. Old established con-.
pany. Large limo giving compAets
satisfaction, which means farTa ~
peat sales. Every home Z reaA pT0s-
pcct for our attractive AAs a house.
hold necessities. Liberal comntssioa.
No Investment in goods. Hpieadid o.
portunity for ambitious man who de-
sires permanent and profitabla en-.
ployment. Write today for full pas.
ticulars. Heberling Medicfue Co.,
Dept. 5S7, Bloomington, III. TIM II
The Democratic banner. (Mt. Vernon, Ohio) 1898-192?, 1922-08-01
QUARTERLY TELE-
PHONE RENTS NOW
DUE. MT. VERN ON
TELEPHONE co. x3lx28*

Mrs. Victor Lantz and Mrs. Oscar
Fletcher returned to their homes In
Columbus today after spending two
weeks at Rogers Lake camping with
Nj, and Mrs. George Knccht and fam.
ily.
Mrs, Willard c, Armstrong left this
morning for Pittsburgh, Pa, for a
short visit with her sister. Mrs. Allen
Fink. Mrs. Fink will accompany Mrs.
Armstrong to Mt. Vernon to spend
the remainder OF tho summer
The following returned today from
a weeks outing at Buckeye Lake.
Mesdames Harry Smoots. Charles Sal
isbury, Edward l.. Parker. b. L. Lar
sen, Arthur Rawlinson. Ralph Jewell,
Charles A. Beck and Edward neldell.
The Democratic banner. (Mt. Vernon, Ohio) 1898-192?, 1922-08-01

Mr.. and Mrs. H. w. Schram, Miss
Mildred Schram, and Mr.. and Mrs.
Glenn Bowers of Cambridge, O., were
the guests Of Mr.. and Mrs. G. M. Flem.
ing, East Burgess street, over Sunday
Miss Mildred will remain here for a
few days visit.
Every purchaser has an equal
chance regardless of time of purchase
at Frank l.. Young's 81 package sale.
Articles and packages on display in
our window. x31
Edward Brining, James Brining, ia
cob Beard, DR.. ]. M. Pumphrey and
son returned to Mt. Vernon Sunday
afternoon, being the last members of
the party OF fishermen who went to
Lions Head, Ontario, Canada, to re-
turn.
When Blue Devil approaches
Each little microbe squirms,
For he has reputation
AS a devil among the germs
MWF x4
Mr.. II. G. Jackson OF Sparta, Mrs.
Clinton Vail and Mr.. and Mrs. Milton
Reeder and son of Mt Vernon were
the guests the latter part Of the week
of Mr.. and Mrs. Murray Moore at
their home, East Church street. Mr..
Jackson, who is SO years OF age, is
an uncle of Mrs. Moore.-Newark Ad.
yOLate.
The Democratic banner. (Mt. Vernon, Ohio) 1898-192?, 1922-08-01
r. CRAIG KNOX
Democratic Candidate for
Commissioner
(Middlebury Township

Mr.. Cutler OF Columbus visited his
mother. Mrs. Eleanor Cutler of the
M. and S. sanitorium Sunday.
{ Mr.. j. G. Childers Of Danville was
called to Plattsburg. w. Va, on ac.
count Of the illness of his son who is
visiting there with Mrs. Childers.
Mr.. and Mrs. Walter Colgin and
children of Indianapolis, Ind, are Wis.
iting Mr.. and Mrs. Leo Voyles of
Centerburg.
Mr.. and Mrs. H. r. Wood OF De,
trot, Mrs. Ben Wood and son Bur-
dett, and Mr.. Furlong of Norwalk
spent Sunday at Gambler with Mr..
James Wood, summer school stu.
dent there.
Mr.. and Mrs. Richard SAINT and two
sons of East Liverpool are visiting the
formers mother, Mrs. SAINT of Gam.
bier.
Mrs. Helen Breeze of Miami, Fla,
Is visiting relatives in Gambler.
Mr.. and Mrs. Carl Horn of Mt. Yer.
non, spent Sunday in Gambler.
Mr.. and Mrs. Harry Hill returned to
Kenmore Sunday after weeks visit
in Gambler.
Mr.. Harold Edminister who has
been employed at Braman, Okla, ar.
rived in the city today. He will spend
several days with his mother, Mrs.
Nina Edminister Of East Burgess
street.
Miss Lillian McClelland of St.
Louisville spent the weekend in the
city the guest of Mr.. and Mrs. Lewis
Murdoch, West High street.
Mrs. Dwight Ewalt was removed
from the NJ, G s. sanitarium to her
home on Noruh Jefferson street, to.
/ day, in Miller & O'Bryan's ambulance.
| Mr. j. S. Purdy Of Gambler trans.
acted business in this city today.
We clean and renovate feathers,
ana make mattresses. The Sanitary
Mattress Co, Johnstown, o. Phone
your orders to No. 3S. X3
"~*The missionary society OF The
Howard Christian church will meet
with Mrs. j. c. White on Thursday,
Aug. 3. Note change in time.
The Democratic banner. (Mt. Vernon, Ohio) 1898-192?, 1922-08-01
For Violin Backs,

When any figure appears on q
smooth surface as though in relief, II
Is called mottle, says the American
Forestry Magazine. The fiddle-back
mottle appears u series OF. hills and
valleys ana derives Its name from the
common use OF maple with such figure
In making the backs Of violins.
The Democratic banner. (Mt. Vernon, Ohio) 1898-192?, 1922-08-01
How Anna Wen Out.

Sunny how things work out some
times" said the married marine to a
bunch Of his buddies. '"IwO years ago
i was going around with Ethel and
Anna. and ! couldn't for the life Of
ma tell which Of the two wanted to
marry. One night dropped into the
post exchange to buy a cigar. Right
Oh the cigsr band. as large as life, Il
said, Havana r"=-Leatherneck.
The Democratic banner. (Mt. Vernon, Ohio) 1898-192?, 1922-08-01

Mr.. and Mrs. Dana Fry and Mr..
I Charles Scholes and Mr.. and Mrs. G.
Schoies OF Danville spent Sunday at
, the home of Mr.. and Mrs. Leonard
Fry. Oak street.
Misses Genevieve and Maxine Wag.
ner of West High street went to Carl
ton yesterday to spend the remainder
of the summer with their grandmoth.
er.
Mr. Charles Cooper Jr., who has
been spending some time in Cleye-
land, was called home Sunday by the
serious illness of his father, Mr.. c. e.
Coope..
Don't forget! 81 package sale at
Young's jewelry store Wednesday,
Aug 2. Actual values of goods ranges
upward to $52. XII
Miss Pauline Pelton of East Vine
street returned to her home Saturday
from months visit with relatives in
Kentucky, West Virg MA. and several
cities in Ohio.
Mr.. Donald Wootton OF the Cleve.
land Plain Dealer is home for weeks
vacation at the home OF his parents,
Main street.
You cant get less than a dollars
worth ana you may gCt diamond
ring at Frank l.. Young 5 $l package
sale Wednesday, Aug. 2. x3l
Miss Margene Faddis of Lakeside
Hospital Cleveland, Is here for a
three weeks vacation at the home of
her parents, Mr.. and Mrs. Albert Fad.
dis.
Mrs. Thomas Thorndoff and son
Frank, Of Cleveland, spent the week
end with Mr.. and Mrs. Jesse Sensel,
West Vine street Mrs. Thorndof
will remain here for weeks visit
Mrs. C. Il. Purdy OF North Main
street returned yesterday from two
weeks visit with Mr.. and Mrs. Oliver
Hagan, who are camping near Han.
over.
Don't swear! Ride ON Diamonds.
20X31a cord, $l0.75. Mt. Vernon Tire
Co., Vine and Mulberry streets.
MWF x7
Messrs. Robert Wells, Francis Bit
finger and Harold Phillips and Misses
Alice Wysner, Ruth Trott and Genieve
Barr were visitors at Summerland
Beach yesterday.
Mr.. and Mrs. Henry Sheppard, who
reside south of the city, had as their
guests yesterday Mr.. and Mrs. w. V.
Huntworth OF Columbus and Mr.. and
Mrs. w. e. James of Somerset
Mrs. G. l.. Moushey and son Paul
returned to their home on North Gay
street after spending ten days with
the fcrmer's mother, Mrs. Meyers, at
Plymouth.
Mr.. and Mrs. w. c. Keasling and
daughter, Mr.. and Mrs. Frank Nc
Peek, Mr.. and Mrs. Paul Shipley. Miss
Ilo Porter and Mr. George Shipley
spent Sunday at Rogers Lake.
Just returned from the convention
of Ohio -Michigan-lndiana photograph
ers In Cleveland. New ideas mean
up-to'date photography. Tinkey's stu
dio, Mt. Vernon, o. x3l
Miss Genevieve Marsino of Canton
who has been visiting her grandmOth
er, Mrs. A. Schiappacasse, went to Mt
Gilead today to spend a week witt
relatives.
| Mr.. ad Mrs. Robert Kell and daugh
ter Alice, of Fort Wayne, Ind, ant
Mr.. and Mrs, Ralph Brown of Cleve
land arrived in Mt. Vernon Saturda,
TO visit Mr.. and Mrs, Russell G.. Croucf
1
The Democratic banner. (Mt. Vernon, Ohio) 1898-192?, 1922-08-01

WANTED--Tire and tube repairing.
All work guaranteed. Phone US. We
will deliver. SO2 black. W. Jacobs.
x3t
The Democratic banner. (Mt. Vernon, Ohio) 1898-192?, 1922-08-01
LOST

LOST - Package containing two
shirts one pair cuff buttons. eas col.
lar button. Finder please eau S39. Re.
ward. tf
The Democratic banner. (Mt. Vernon, Ohio) 1898-192?, 1922-08-01
CLASSIFIED COLUMN
FOR SAlE-Miscellane house
hold goods. Call 465 green. x2


FOR SAlE-15-22 Steel Mule tract
or. bottom John Deere plow, foot
double disc, AL condition. Write La
vfna A. CARRIER, Bellville, o. x2
FOR SAlE-The new Goodrich RO-
tary sewing machines, none better
$40. 105 West High street. w. Fl
Mullenix, agent. MWF xii
FOR SALE-Buick car, light six
1923 model, good as new. Terms rea-
sonable. William A. Adams, Gambler
Ohio. If
FOR SALE &-ton Kelley-Spring-
field truck, good condition. Price
right. Inquire Neibarger & Fairchild
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1922-10-14
Harry LADDERS Program

For the coming week, opening Mon
day night. the Walnut will have the
perennially popular Sir Harry Lauder.
The little comedian will again sing his
famous sailor chsntey. There Is Some
body Waiting for Me- but the re-
,nainder of his program, it is announced.
will be entirely different from that Of
last season. All the other old songs
which have been selected have not been
heard in the United States for several
years. They include "She's Ma Daisy"
undoubtedly LADDERS greatest bit of
song buffonnery. '"The Sunshine o. a
Bonnie Lassie's Smilc,' formerly a
popular number on the Lauder pro-
gram, and his "Doughie tho Baker. 4"
Among the new songs are "Singing Is
the Thing to Make You CHEEKY" and
bella, the Belle o'Dunoon." The
company assisting the comedian this
season includes: Ginturo. Oriental top :
spinner DE Pace, mandolinist Winona
Winter. vocalist. the Brothcrs Gaud.
smith. London Hippodrome clowns and
Uintuh Masterman, whistling sololst.
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1922-10-14
.NIii,Strel9

~ MONl %.-Ncw travesty this week.
entitled Tho pnching squire" with
Charlie Hoydcn heading the cast, put
ing 1t on: also. George Frcdo. musi-
cal artist Emmett Welch. new bal
lads John Lemuels. larky comedy
skit. For Jims Sake" and others.
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1922-10-14
lsadora puncan,s prosram

Isadora Duncan, famous dancer
after an absence Of fve years, will ap-
pear for one night only at the Academy
of Music next Tuesday in an excep-
tional program Of Tschaikowsky : Wag-
ncr masterpieces, assisted by Franko's
Symphony Orchestra, conducted by
Nahan Franko. This Is Miss Dun
cans only appearance in this city, and
ut the same time her farewell per-
formance. after a short tour or four
months, It is her intention to retire
from public life.
The arrangement Of the program she
will interpret on next Tuesday evening
follows:
First part--Overture 1912, Tschai-
kowsky, by the orchestral. Symphony
No. @, Pathetique. Tschaikowsky, by
Miss Duncan. Part 2-Prclude and
Death Of Isolde from Tristan and
Isolde, Wagner, by the orchcstra /;
Overture from '"Tannhauser.' Wag-
ner. by Miss Duncan: Venusberg
Bacchanal from "Tannhauser," Wag-
ner, by Miss Duncan.
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1922-10-14

ransimos, ro, aerial act; Lew Wilson,
comedy, songs and chatter Case and
wayne, comedy. singing and talking
,nai;, Harry Tenney and company, song
Thursssy of!asoma Fsisaw sm% Topr sntrdsyy snoyelty
listen, Lester" miniature musical
comedy, and big surrounding bill.
WILLTAM PENN - Joe Morris and
VIM Shaw in THE Mosquito Trust"
iineoy talkfest, is next weeks head
,mer , also. Syncopated Seven. five
imen inea and a., two women. in Jazz. render
cng,, rngs; MaX M Bloom and Alice. sher,
ffixpIerts; experts; film, feature. Sherlock
m!rSoimes," with John Barrymore;
thursday. Tnl Friday and Saturday, Ber,
hT, hMTSien, character comedian. heads
oni MN IL "Alwa!'s tho Woman"
oRPHEUM.-Jack Wilson and company
ih n,,n "A Nonsensical Revue" comedy,
SGst c!s, including Charles Forsythe and
Willie Ward: also The Shcwotr."
new comedy by George Kelly Bos-
s9ek'g Riding, School, with Lillian
Circus Riders asa Are s0mMpdaey mppaey pam1dSs IL "mSw
novelty act; James Clemons and COM
pany. musical comedy favorItes
Nompe and Nevinn, syncopation Bert
nnu ,n,u sue keitcn. music and dancing
MN Is Rich Mems Wives"
~ . iepper Box Revue minia turc
musical comedy, with large company.
II next weeks headlner also. Ash and
: franks, comedy singing and talking
AieN sparks and company, musical
comedy pantonime; Gladiators, aero
bats; Ralph and Reese in u mixture
OF songs. dances and patter: Detzel
ana Carroll. blackface comedians, in
comedy and dancing speciality: also,
MIN feature, In tho Name OF the
Law with Ralph Lewis.
hEYSTONE--Max Ford Revue, featur-
ing vera llaywcrth, Minna Ravn and
DINERS ,is the headliner; also McI.inn
ana Sully In "Tom-Foolery" Jack
code. Dlackface comedian: Art Har-
rls and company, laughing sketch
comedy. farce, Did You See MY
norse? presented by Cooper and
RiCcardo: also, seventh installment
OK In the Days of Buffalo BIll." serial
ana other film features.
NINONS ND--Bll Dale and his
company In ut Happened in Paris"
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1922-10-14
Theatrical Billboard
for the Coming Week
New Attractions

. New Attractions
wlINUT-sr Harry Lauder, famous
Scotch comedian. in his annual tour,
Nth a budget of new songs ana the
aid favortes. and many new comic
stories ,n, In MS obarseter tarse So sinaey and I
Winona winter, .char".ter e'"s''' """
Sthers
AETm .The Beggar's Opera" John Gay
famous old musical play, dating from
i7gS, presented by the original Eng
iish cast, which has been playing for
two years In Hammersm'eh' hohoo"'
Shows That Remain
aIRRiCK - Rain new play taken
from w. Somerset Maugnan story
n, the South Seas: Miss thompson
w,th cast headed by Jeanne Eagels.
HUBERT - "Hitchy fspoo,,s K1o OF ssIiss sszs;.
vith Raymond Hitchcock. Brendel and
Rert, Jack Pearl. Audrey Maple and
others.
,oppEsT -- sally" Ziesfeld musical
cnn,edy success, with Marilyn Miller
Leon Enrol and Walter Catlett head
ing the cast.
lDELpHT - THE Demi-Virgin,' new
Avery Hopwocd farce OF Hollywood
with Hazel Dawn. Bobby Watson.
Peggy Coudray, Glenn Anders and
Alico Hegeman'
BROAD THE Czarina." from. the
Hungarian comedy drama revolving
around Catherine the Great OF Rus
sla, starring Doris Keane.
lyric - "The Rose of Stamboul."
Viennese operetta, with Marion Green,
Tessa Kosta and James Barton.
Stock
nEsliOED East Is West" which
opens tonight, with Mae Desmond In
famous role Of Chinese girl played
so long by Fay Banter. Frank
Fielder Is leading man.
- Vaudeville
4. p. EEITH'S-Eddie Foy. favorite
comedian. and the younger k'oys in IL
Bryan Foy and William jerome. con-
tanning COMEDY, songs and dancing.
heads next weeks BIN; also. Johnny
Burke in musical monologue; David
music and dance novelty Lois Ben
nett songs Harry Moore. royal paper
manipulator, in novelty; Williams
and Taylor dances; Yost and Clady.
Jean Berzac's Circus, novelty with
animals, and usual picture.
oLOBE--Bob Nelson. singing comedian
piano by Herbie Hewson, is next
weeks headllner; also. David Sab
losky's skit. The Kid From Madrid"
with Jimmy Gildea and Jay and
Dorothy HendrckS The Country
Store" rural musical comedy; Zelda
Santley. songs and comedy: Four
Miners, new songs: Mile. Kalama and
company. dancing novelty; Middle
ton, Spellmaycr and company, scenic
playlet. aud others
ALLEGHENY - Yvette and Band.
singing, dancing and violin novelty.
Is next weeks headliner: also. Homer
Dickinson and Florence Tempest
musical comedy stars. in act Jules
Black and his Perfect Fools in school
Days" comedy. songs and dances
Jennings and Mazier. blackface come
dams; Genaro and Gold, singing and
dancing novelty skit. and flnl feature.
Rich Mems Wives" with House
Peters.
BROADWAY MONDAY. Tuesday and
Wednesday, Fay Marbe. musical COM
edy and screen star, in her own act
personality Songs and Dances" Is
next weeks headlner the film fea
ture, sherlock Holmes" with John
Barrymore: also. Listen, Lester"
musical comedy tabloid, ana viii H |
Ward and company in comedy +;
headiner is At ! a. M.," musical
comedy; film IS "Rich Mems Wives"
GROSS hEY&-Monday. Tuesday and !
Wednesday. Dummies" miniature |
muslIal comedy produced by Richard
bartlett with big cast; also, -Four
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1922-10-14
Lucky Mr.. hopWoodI

Avery Ilopwood, author of the new
est farce success, "Thc Demi- Virgin, +"
now playing at the Adelphi Theatre,
nails from Cleveland. Mr.. Hopwood
has accumulated n fortune in the sue
cessful practice Of his hazardous pro.
icssion. and it is a question If any
other playwri gifts name is more famil-
inr to the American playgoing public
thar his. Last season he had the honor
or seeing five of his successes playing
at one time in the metropolis.
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1922-10-14

THDCA ADERO-"The Jolly Girls" witt,
gladys Darling, danseusc. as special
feature. and cast that Includes Fat
tamllton. Homer Penis. Jack Know,
Kene NiNiennc and Josic Fountain.
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1922-10-14
Pepper Pots" at Biiou

Tho Bijou will present next week Moe
Mcssing's Pepper rots." 1t is out :
lined ns musical melange of comedy.
vaudeville and birlesquc. The musical
comedy is divided into two acts, in
which seven principals nre scheduled to
appear, with chorus of eighteen sing :
ing and dancing girls. The cast is
headed by Charlie Goldie, the Philadel-
phin boy: and Bertha Delmonte, priina
DONNA, The other members Of the ca st
are Charley (ItedD Marshall, Harry
Nccler, Jack Leonard, Rae IeAnse,
eighteen. ~
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1922-10-14

with singing. dancing and comedy :
also. Claire Vincent and company In
comedy sketch Ben Marks and Dolly
Wilson, travcsty creations; Carleton
and Tate, vocalists: Wilbur Sweatmar
and his band In syncopation act |:
Visor and company, EXmnasts; Duces
brothers. tumbling clowns, and usual
film program.
WALTON ROOF-Sascha Piatov and
Lois Natalie in original dance crea-
tons. are tho feature of the program I:
also, Violet Carlson. billed as the
"miteoy prima DONNA late of Spice
or 1922" in songs; Mason-Dixon
Steven an orchestra from the South,
whose members render individual
numbers
NLXON =. Monday, Tuesday and
wednesday. Two Boys OF Long
Ago novelty musical and acrobatic
feature, with Tom Ward also Lyons
and losco. songs and music: Tracy
ana Mcbride, musical comedy expo
ncnts: Meredith and Snoozer, novelty.
and the Vincent Brothers, triple bar
performers: Frank Mayo in Caught
I;luffin." film. There will be n COM
plcto change OF bin Thursday.
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1922-10-14

BJOC-"pcpper Pots" Moe Messing $
chorus of eighteen, in two acts and
eleven scenes; cast includes Charlie
,io!die. Philadelphia boy, and Bertha
DelmOntc, prima donna and others
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1922-10-14
Burlesque

CA SlNO--"Radio Girls" Sim Williams
show. for which Tom Howard fur.
nshed the book and Solly Fields did
the staging. with cast that includes
Hitly iilr.rt. featured comedian
'ieorn, classic dancer; Guth Brothers,
melody trio; Bob and Emma Wilson
and others
The Holbrook news., 1922-05-05
STIRRED UP THE COMMUNITY
Gap Johnson's Good Reasons for Thinking Confessions Can Be
 Little Too Public.

They've been carrying on a revival over luther side of Mount Piggy for quite spell" related Gap Johnson of Bumpus Ridge. ''and a pleasant time was had till the converts took to con- fessing in meeting. A sister rig up and let it be known that she and cer tam brother had been figgering on elOping, and two Or three brothers fol lered with remarks about the sins of themselves and other gents. Next day the lady's husband hunted up the feller she said she'd been going to elope with. and although he swOre he'd never even heerd of tie plan. whipped him to a custard. And quite passel of gents left in the next few days, claiming that if everybody was going to tell everything they knowed they didn't feel like waiting till the grand jury set Religion is all right but 1 sorter low it ort to be a pri vate matter-every Teller that feels like he'd got to confess go ahead and do so, but leave other folks out of It."-Kansas City Star.
The Holbrook news., 1922-05-05
HAD FORGOTTEN HIS LINES
And Bridesroor's Explanation Only Added to the Ludicrousness of
 the Situation.

A widower in Pennsylvania town. no longer young man, gave the clergyman good deal of trOuhie by his stupidity on the occasion of lis second marriage. He seemed to- be possessed by some spirit of con trariety.
 When told to give his right hand he gave his left. When the minister said: Say this after me-" he hR- mediately replied: Say this after me-" Then, when the words he was to repeat were given. he was stOiidiy silent.
 At last he seemed to be aware that the minister was somewhat dis turbed, and in the middle of the service he upset the reverend gen tleman's gravity by volunteering this apology:
 You see, sir, it's so long since T was married before that you must excuse my getting these things mixed"
The Holbrook news., 1922-05-05

adaptable to them. as organdy and taf- feta, and many little tricks are re- sorted to by designers to insure the bOuffant silhouette. Tucks-wide or narrow-ruffles, bound edges and cov- cred cord trimming serve instead of hoops to keep the skirts outstanding.
 The pretty taffeta frock shown here is fine example of this popular style for afternoon or informal evening wear. Its tucks and ruffies do double duty, serving for adornment and to give additional body to the silk. The skirt is straight and full. bOrdered with pin tucks and scalloped at the bottom. Narrow ruffles serve to out line the scallops. They have picot edges and are gathered with little outstanding frill along the upper edge. The elbow sleeves are finished with corresponding trimming and a collar
The Holbrook news., 1922-05-05
HAD TO GO WITHOUT GAP
MT. Johnson Really Had Good Excuse for Not Joining Posse on Hunt
 for Robbers.

Paw" eXcitedly exclaimed young Runt. 'Zeke Yawkey and passel of fellers are out in front They say the bank at Tumlinville has been robbed, and they want you to grab your gun and go with 'em to hunt the robbers !"
 '"Tell 'em Pm much Obleeged and powerful sorry" replied Gap Johnson of Bumpus Ridge, but I aint' in no shape to jine 'em. Gabe Gosnell dropped in spell ago and lowed that as he was going to be married this af ternoon to the Widder McCOrkindale he'd like to borry my best britches to wear during the anecdote, and as felt I'd just about as soon sleep today as not I let him have 'em. And your maw is just sewing up the gable end of my old ones whur the rOan COW hooked me by mistake for her calf or some thing So you tell the gents, Runt, that if twas ary other time I'd be tickled to go with 'em. but just at present I'll have to lav ."-Kansas City Star.