davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Arizona republican., 1922-03-22
The ONCE OVER
PAYING FOR THE SOLDIERS
BONUS
By H. /. PHILLIPS

PAYING FOR THE SOLDIERS
To bonus or not to bone us"?-
that is the question.
And if so, how?
The administration thinks it would
be a grand thing to do, regardless of
cost, particularly if it could be done
without any cost.
At last reports the congressional
ways and what do-we- mean commit
tee was in hot debate over proposal
to produce the necessary money out
of black silk hat. Kellar, the Great
Lafayette and Houdini it was stated,
had promised cooperation.
There are plenty of silk hats in
congress, and the administration de-
clared today that it couldn't see why.
if white rabbits, turtle doves and
paper flowers could be produced from
them by a clever magician, the SOL
diers' bonus couldn't be produced the
same way.
The American legion raised no pro-
test TO this plan except to warn con-
SIGSS lIldl any 10 pay the SUI
diers with white rabbits would be un-
satisfactory.
DUNN and Dummer favor paying
the bonus by legalizing light wines
and beers and devoting the tax to
the cause.
Great ideal" declared Senator
DUNN. '1t gives the nation chance
to DRINK ITS WAY OUT OF THE
BONUS PROBLEM
"That'll make it a $3.50 proposition
anyhow" said Representative Dunn
mer. "Give a soldier his bonus and
give the taxpayer his drinks. It'll
make drinking a matter of patriotism.
I can imagine nothing more satisfy
ing than TO feel that a sense of duty
and good citizenship requires that /
get all lit up as often as possible to
do my bit for the returned warrior"
'Righto!" replied Senator DUNN.
They fought for US OVER THERE;
Arizona republican., 1922-03-22

why shouldn't we drink for them
OVER HERE? l can imagine the
satisfaction of sitting on the back
porch Of a hot summer evening and
saying TO you, 'Dummer, run down
10 Casey's and get me another pitcher
OF suds. Two soldiers Just got back
from the other side, and | want to do
my part to see they are well taken
care Of financially"
Whereupon Dummer, emitting a
faint squeak of joy, collapsed al the
mere thought of such a happy situa-
ton.
A Possible Situation
can't you imagine this conversation
II payment of the bonus via light
wines and beers comes about:
Have another?"
mo, thanks"
Whats the matter? Are you pro-
German or sumpin?
Whaddya mean?"
ANY man at 'ud refuse another
drink at time like this must be
'gainst L. s."
How d'ya make that out?"
ANY man at refuses drink helps to
keep heroes great war broke. =.
Gotta keep drinkin' T. pay bonus"
"Oh, Well. in that case order me a
seidel of ale. My mistake Better
phone the wife now that you won't
be home before midnight"
'Why?"
We're gunter stay right here and
help the bonus as much as we caO"
'Righto."
Upon Arrival Home
Wife: Drunk again, eh?
Husband: Yes, a'am, and proud
Of it.
Wife: Proud. eh? OF what?
Husband: I've been helping to pay
for the soldiers bonus.
Wife: How d'ya make that out?
Husband: Every drink meant a Ger
tain amount of money for the bonus
tax.
Wife; Judging by your condition
You must have been trying to assume
the financial responsibility for
whole regiment.
Husband: Regiment m'dear?--I
trying to take care Of a division!
Arizona republican., 1922-03-22
By Frederick J. Haskin

WASHINGTON, d. c., March 21--
The hundredth anniversary OF the
birth of General Grant will be cell
ebrated in a few meeks, on April q.
to be exact. The recognition of this
event will get in Washington will be
the unveiling of memorial at the
foot of the Capitol on the west side,
work on which was commenced years
ago.
To the great majority Of Amer
leans, Grant Is merely what they
have learned and read of him from
the printed page. The men alive to-
day who knew Grant when he was
at the forefront of those making
American history are few and far
between. Prominent among this
dwindling number is "Uncle Joe"
Cannon, Oldest member of the house
OF representatives in point of serv-
ice Mr.. Cannon's first hand rec
objections of General Grant are as
fresh as II he had parted from the
famous soldier but a week ago.
Grant forced recognition of his
ability as a military genius, accord
ing to Uncle Joe. There was moth
ing flashy nothing dramatic in Cen
eral Grant. 1t is a deplorable fact
but true, that brother officers in the
Union armies did their utmost TO
give credit for victories and military
feats to others. often TO themselves,
when success actully was due to the
ability and brains of Grant.
''In April, 1861, this man presided
at a Union meeting in a small Illi-
nois town, unknown even to ma
jority of his neighbors,r Mr.. Cannon
points out. Tn April, 1865, he pre-
sided at that famous Union meeting
at Appomattox when armed resist
ance to the Union ended. He had
not come to this success and dis
tinction through political favoritism
or favorable publicity. unless we ac-
cept General Bragg's epigram on Gro
yer Cleveland, We love him for the
enemies he has made.
What Uncle Joe calls the "polit-
ical generals and the literary gem
erals" all opposed Grant, and envied
him. But in spite of the criticism
and abuse aimed at him, he COM
PEELED recognition of his military
ability until Lincoln, before he had
ever seen Grant, made the recently
unknown soldier commander of all
the northern forces.
Arizona republican., 1922-03-22

killed when IL sits upon an electric
wire ~. e. s.
A. The bureau OF biological survey
says that when a bird sits upon q
single electric wire, the circuit Is
not completed. II any portion of his
body, however, rests on the second
wire, the bird will receive a shock
and probably be killed
q. Please explain the meaning OF
the word "dossier."-G. o.
A. The word "dossier' is French.
1t is used in English in reference to a
bundle of papers relating to some
matter. The word is Anglicized and
pronounced with the ''r" sounded
@. Was Frederick u known as
Frederick the Great during his life
time ~. c.
A. Frederick the Great was given
this sobriquet after his death.
@. What kind of cloth is used in
airpianes ?-E. D. c.
A. The cloth used in airplanes is
made of Irish linen or South Sea
Island cotton. 1t usually runs about
so inches wide.
@. What is a cat -boat?-E. 3. c.
A. A cat-boat is a boat having one
mast stepped just abaft the bow and
CARRYING a sail laced to boom and
gaff, resembling a schooners main
sail
@. Who wrote the rhyme, u do
not like thee, Or. Fell; The reason
why, cannot tell; But this ! know,
and know full we'll, do not like
thee, Or. FeIp?--M. v. g.
A. Tom Brown. who was born In
1868, and died in 1904, was the author
of the lines addressed to DIR. Fell. an
instructor in a boys school for whom
the author felt an aversion.
@. Which division of our troops in
the World war saw most active serv-
ice7 G. Mel.
A. The First division of the United
States army saw the greatest number
of days active service, (battle serv-
ice) having had 90 active days and
127 ouiet days.
Arizona republican., 1922-03-22
'crtonBrdIeyS
Daily Poem
Wireless

The wireless operator Of the Nor
weglan steamer Grontoft sent out his
calls for aid couched in humorous
slang until his ship sank.--News
Item.
No solemn language goes for him.
This bird who tapped his key
And gaily with a cheerful vim,
Faced death upon the sea;
Nor let his slangy wit grow dim
Till he had ceased to be.
I would not celebrate his deed
In phrases fine and high,
For should his spirit lamp the screed
He'd wink a ghostly eye.
But this I'll say fer all who read.
He was a nervy guyl
Some boyi He made the ether throb
With many a jape and wheeze
While sticking 10 his wireless Job
In ugly, smashing seas
So / sing not with lines that sob
But with jazz lines like these.
1 write the argot that he spoke
And flashed across the air,
Before II came his time to croak,
Fearless and free of care,
A nervy. peppy Jazzy bloke--
Yea, bo, that boy was there!
Arizona republican., 1922-03-22
distinction in the eyes of the world
Target of Many Critics.

Target of Many Critics.
Hordes Of critics levelled their
shafts at Grant from the time OF his
advent on the national stage until his
death on Mount McGregor, Mr.. Can
non says. These critics could see
nothing good in Grant--no military
ability, no patriotic devotion, no NOR
al courage in the soldier while his
battles were in progress, but were
forced to join in the praise heaped on
him when his victories were won.
Genral Grant refused TO have the
surrender at Appomattox commemor-
ated in an historic painting repre-
senting him as receiving the sword
of Lee, as General Gates is represent
ed in the surrender Of Burgoyne at
Saratoga, In the monster painting
which hang in the Rotunda OF the
capitol here. Mr.. Cannon is author
ity for the statement that Grant new
er touched Lees sword.
You are aware" says Mr.. Cannon,
that the Federal government has
never commemorated in monument or
picture the fall of the Confederacy. II
never will. 1t has provided for the
preservation of the most historic bat
tlefields and there mingle the monu-
ments to the heroism of both armies"
Mr.. Cannon believes that there is pro-
found wisdom in the policy OF not
making monuments to the end OF the
war between the states.
Fruits Of Federal Policy.
This policy has obliterated the
scars of war more completely than
any other policy could have DONE"
Mr.. Cannon believes, ''for it has
spread the industries once confined to
New England to the South and West,
and although New England has null
tiplied her industries many. many
times, she has now but a minor per-
centage of the great industrial output
of this country
The criticism and opposition 20
Grant came TO a head when the Lib
eral Republican party was organized
with Horace Greeley the famous New
York editor, trying to disrupt the
party OF Lincoln and unseat Grant.
The Democratic convention of 1872
was persuaded virtually to hide the
identity of the party and swallow
hook. line and sinker the platform OF
the new organization with Greeley at
its head. The Democratic party Of
ficially was practically on record as
supporting a radical protectionist-
for Horace Greeley was that--in or
der to down General Grant. The plat
form of this curious coalition con-
tanned such terms as "treachery'' and
"usurpation" in describing the actions
OF General Grant. Mr.. Cannon says
that nearly every newspaper of any
size and influence in the country was
behind Greeley and against Grant.
The trouble with the coalition. ac-
cording to the veteran OF scores of
political battles. was that the Repub-
Hn1 hn fa nd
others opposed to Grant had little of
a constructive nature on which any
OF them agreed being united princi-
pally in their dislilles and antipathies.
The fight resulted in Grants election
by the largest popular vote ever given
a presidential candidate UP to that
time.
Arizona republican., 1922-03-22
Questions And
AnsWers

@. When was the first big con-
crete ship built in the United States I?
"A. J. w.
A. The first large concrete ship
| built in the United States of a type
| designed to be propelled by motor
power. was the Faith a ship of
600 net tons cargo. This ship was
| launched in San Francisco in 1918
and was put into service the same
year.
@. What was meant by the dol
lar-a-year man during the late war I?
| Did anyone in the United States re-
ceiVe only a dollar a year?- A. r..
A. A dollar "a year-man is q man
working for the government for one
dollar a year. II is against the poll
cy of the United States government
to employ anyone without salary.
Therefore, these men who were Civ
ing their services to the United States
charged the United States one dollar
a year.
@. What causes the explosion Of
dynamite--a shock or spark. IF. S.
A. The bureau of mines says that
the explosion of dynamite is caused
by shock or detonation and not by
spark.
@. How is china tableware grad
ed?-R. n. B.
A. There are two grades OF table
ware: "Firsts," perfect in shape. de-
sign, and glaze; and seconds" which
are imperfect in one, two, or all three
requirements. One may select table
ware imperfect in either shape or
design, but should never accept a
piece imperfect in glaze.
@. How many men were elassed
as conscientious obiectors" during
the war?--A. L. Nj. L.
A. The War Department says that
1889 men were listed under the head
OF conscientious objectors.
q. Why is bird not shocked nor
Arizona republican., 1922-03-22
Alfalfa

We sec by an advertisement in The Republican
that alfalfa in this valley is practically cleaned up;
that II there is any more No / alfalfa left it is
worth SIS ton. That that the next crop will
be in ready demand at good figures and that those
who may be IN a position to furnish it will be fortu-
nate.
There is not much alfalfa land from which
crops may be Immediately realized as there used to
Arizona republican., 1922-03-22
noon REASON WHY

sandy-So ye didna' go away for
the wee-end Mac?
Mac-No, Sandy. The MacGreSors
wrote an invited me to their place,
an I'd like TO have gone, but they
forgot tae enclose a stamped en-
velope for reply. Passing Show,
London.
Arizona republican., 1922-03-22
A WORD FOR FATHER

Dear Cod" prayed golden haired little Willie
please watch my mamma"
And then he added as an afterthought:
"And dunno it would do any harm to keep
the old man, too."-The LeathernecS
(Washington).
Arizona republican., 1922-03-22
NEVER MIND THE CORRIDORS

"Your name" exclaimed the admiring constituent
"wl echo down the corridors of time"
81 don't demand that much" said Senator Sor-
ghum much affected. "Al / ask is that my services
may be considered sufficiently worthy to keep my
mentioned in the various political conventions"
Washington Star.
Arizona republican., 1922-03-22
WHAT DID HE sAY1

LODGE TELLS HARDING FoUR-PoWtR TREATY
IS IN MUCH DANGER
The New York Times, Sunday, March s.
LODGE TELLS HARDING PACT CAN NOT FAIL.
The New York Tribune (same date)
Arizona republican., 1922-03-22
THE ADVANTAGES OF THRIFT

IF man had put a hundred dollars in a savings
bank twenty years ago." said the statistician after
dinner, 1T would amount two hundred dollars
now, and he could buy almost as much for It now
he could have got for the original hundred at the
time he began to save."-New York Sun.
Arizona republican., 1922-03-22
oRAToRIcAL PREcAUrIoN

You always have very convincing way of
speaking"
I generally ascertain the views Of my auditors
and then fall in line closely possible confded
Senator Sorghum. I'm that way have 'em con-
vnced before start. wa shington Star
Arizona republican., 1922-03-22
SHE REMEMRERe

Mrs Asquith Is lecturing in the United states on
People Have Met" Some Of the people in ques-
ton are wondering when they are going to hear the
last of it-Eve.
Arizona republican., 1922-03-22

Our idea of a frst-class automobile salesm
would be one who could sell Senator Newberry
Ford.-CoIumbus (Ohio) Dispatch.
Arizona republican., 1922-03-22
TER THE DISARMAMENT CoNFERl

Mr.. Hardng-Where's the Army?
Mr.. Coolidge-He's out rowing in the Nav
Our Navy.
Arizona republican., 1922-03-22

Some one says that not one man in ten can
think on his feet. Why lug in the feet? Not man
in ten who can talk glibJy is really thinking.
Arizona republican., 1922-03-22

The prohibitionists seem to be encouraging the
homebrew industry. There is method in such ap-
parent madness self made convert to teetotalism
is apt to be fiery and persistent one
Arizona republican., 1922-03-22
ENROLL YOUR NAME NOW
IN PIONEERS ASSOCIATION

the Arizona Pioneers association is
progress All who residents of the
such eligible membership
The membership decided when the association
was organized is dollar
in the blank below today if qualified and desire
ledin blank should with the
Fokas the association North First
Avenue, Phoenix.
Arizona republican., 1922-03-22
WHAT A MISSING IT" WILL DO

There Is only one way to get ready for immorali
ty and that is to love this life and live It bravely
and faithfully and cheerfuly can-Arotto dis
Arizona republican., 1922-03-22

New York paper tries to discourage the ex-
service man by telling him that after he. gets his
bonus he can spend the rest Of his days digging up
taxes to help pay for It, In the mean time he will
have good deal Of help.
Arizona republican., 1922-03-22

The only way to have budget system is to have
it without exception equivocation. otherwise it
Is system.
Arizona republican., 1922-03-22
ALL CLEAR NOW

A professor says that sedentary work tends to
lessen the endurance. In other words the more one
sits the less one can stand.-Boston Transcript.
Arizona republican., 1922-03-22

Will we get done with these Arbuckle,
Obenchain and Burch messes?
Arizona republican., 1922-03-22
FEW AND SMALL

7 understand your cook has left"
YES" answered the housewife, who was taking
account of the broken china, "but not much wash
ington Star.
Arizona republican., 1922-03-22

There was no way to fix that initiative ant
referendum amendment that it would look decent
Arizona republican., 1922-03-22
A SAFEGUARD
REAL SALESMANsHIP

Divorces are practically unlInow in Sweden Pei
fecty natural in the land OF safety matches!-Life
Arizona republican., 1922-03-22

The only knocker we know OF who enjoys good
reputation is opportunity probably because it knocks
but once.
Arizona republican., 1922-03-22
AGRIcULTURAL NOTE

The only thing that be raised on the farm
at profit just at present is the price-Baltimore
Sun
Arizona republican., 1922-03-22
THElR hALLIIcINATloN

Too many motorists believe,
Or so we're led TO fear,
The stop and Look and Listen!" sign
is for the engineer.
-Tennyson j. BAIT.
Arizona republican., 1922-03-22
WEDNESDAY MORNING. MARCH e. 1922

There is great beauty in going
through life fearleSsly. Half ON.
fears are bdseless, the other half dis
cTedatG0te. --Bovee.
Arizona republican., 1922-03-22
PUBLICITY .PRosLEMs

"Why do you quarrel with the
critics.
Because" answered the highly
sensitive player, they occasionally
print things about us that are un-
favorable and hurt our feelings"
But why specialize on critics?
Why don't you also 20 after the
police reporters Washington Star.
Arizona republican., 1922-03-22

seen twice as much meat at times
and l was never scared
The Coconino sun., 1922-04-21
MAGAZINE SOLICITORS FISH
 HERE FOR SUCKER "VOTES'

An eyeful young woman, trailed by pinch-waisted young man, spent several days here getting "votes" for scholarships at a university. They stayed at a good hotel, had plenty of good things to eat, altogether living much more like prosperous business people than like fledglings who have to earn scholarships in order to 20 to school. Also, they showed more sophisticaticn than the average stu dent.
 Of course, lots of people bit. Plen- ty of "votes" were sold. Some bought who twice before have bit on the same scheme, though never get ting the magazines they subscribed for. One of pair through here last spring with similar subscription scheme, turned out to be thief.
 It is funny, when you come to think of it, that such schemes find suckers who come unknown and without ere dentials; especially when there is a reputable business man right here in town, progressive citizen and tax payer, who has the agency for all magazines as part of his business.
 J. c. Brown is the man referred to. Mrs. Haynes were here doing some
The Coconino sun., 1922-04-21
THE ARTILLERY FERN

There is a curious and wonderful little plant, so rare that few people have ever seen 1t outside of botanists' collections, which is called the "artil. lery fern" This flower behaves in | very strange fashion when it is dipped in water. The branch of fern, cov- cred with its small red seed when held up to the light after being dipped in water, resists the action of the wa ter upon 1t in funny way. First one tiny bud will explode suddenly with sharp crack. scattering it's yellow dust into the air. Then another bud will burst in the same way until the entire branch will be covered with ex ploding buds, like miniature cannon. A sharp crack! followed by a wee puff of smoke! This always occurs after the plant is watered.
The Coconino sun., 1922-04-21
DICK CONNOR RESIGNS
 HIS POSITION AT BABBITTS'

K. J. Connor, known to his hun dreds of friends as Dick, after 1872 years in the service of the Babbitt Bros. Trading Go. has resigned his position as manager of the dry goods department of the local store and next week will begin a much-needed vaca- tion.
 Dick was with the Winslow store 4ha years, then with the Williams store nine years, coming here in 1917.
 He has been active in politics dur ing most of his residence in this county. Though he never sought of flee, he for long time was member of the republican county central con- mittee and was it's chairman for one term.
 Just what his future work is to be. MT. Connor does not predict for cer- tain; but he is candidate for the position of postmaster here, has many packers for the job, and confidently expects the appointment. He has the qualifications and ability to acceptibly fill the job, the only uncertainty about his getting it being the uncertainty that hangs over all appointments un- til they are finally made. In any event, it is to be hoped that neither he nor his charming wife choose any other place than this as their home.
The Coconino sun., 1922-04-21
NEED STATE SCHOOL BOARD AND MORE STATE
 AID, SAYS M'MULLEN
(Continued from Page One)

tion of the birth last week of a son, Dr. Mart Fronske was fined six bits because he hadn't remembered until then that it was the anniversary of his marriage. He was also fined for getting his presents to Sid and Fred mixed and Jimmie Lewis was ordered to pay the half dollar for him.
 Dr. Tex Mackey, sergeant-at-arms, with policeman's coat, helmet and club, nonchalantly wielded the latter and collected every fine imposed.
 There was only one incident to mar the occasion. Just after luncheon was served, City Masshal R. L. Neill came down the stairs and, after a low voiced argument with the chairman, walked over to Bill McClurken's seat. There followed another argument. It was plain to be seen that both men were angry, Bill embarrassed. Bill tried to put the matter off, but the officer insisted on placing him under arrest and took him out of the room.
 No, one knew what was the matter, and hush began to hush, painfully. In a few minutes Bill returned, very Icu Ol ldCc, anu lCluoCu tO ShpldiH, except that it had cost him $5 to get off. The curiosity of the others was not appeased until some time later, when Chairman Breen asked him to explain. He didn't want to, claiming it would get another member of the club in bad and, while it had cost him $5, he would rather lose the money than explain. The chairman insisted. Finally he reluctantly stat ed that he had endorsed $5 check written by President Fred Lusk. The check was no good.
 There was unanimous sigh of relief.
 Some very good music was furnish ed by male quartette composed of Clyde Hunnicutt, Horace Nay, Doug- las Gillespie and Dr. McMullen, the latter taking the place of one of the singers who had failed to show up. Orinn Compton played the piano &C., compartment.
 Forest Supervisor E. G. Miller, new member, was present and ate a lot. Another new member, Ray Bab- bit, was still on the coast. Joe Dolan, Ed Babbitt, Milt Powers and George Harrington were the only other ab- sentees. Guests: T. A. Riordan, Cap tain Arthur, Ernest Coulter, Tom L. Rees, B. w. Dawes, Horace Nay, Douglas Gillespie, Clyde Hunnicutt, Orinn Compton.