Arizona republican., 1922-05-14

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Il Says
Notl.ing spoils an old suit as much
as getting a new one does.
Many a highbrow's mustache looks
like low brow.
Kussla wants to abolish capital by
spending it all.
! Doyle says people are straight in
! the next world. What else could one
expect on the spirit level?
| May flowers bring June weddings
| Only European crowns worth any
| thing are the ones dentists put in.
Girl claims she can see with her
| nose. That's where the others shine.
The burglar motto seems to be
| where there's a. till there's a way"
Women want the last word-espe-
| cially the last word in clothes.
A man Is steering an auto by ra-
! dio: but success win come when you
| can fix an auto by radio.
The latest Chinese puzzle is what
are they fighting about?"
! The don't need broadcasting at
| Genoa. The concert of nations is all
up in the air anyway.
Divorce comes when there arc two
| people with but single thought.
Mexico City has daylight saving.
| What do they want with any extra
daylight in Mexico?
When he gets out his chewing to-
bacco, the honeymoon is over.
II this coal strike continues, the
man with money to burn will need
it next winter.
a husband should be helpful
around the house, says a writer.
Yes. no home is complete without
one.
With a daughter in high school
there isn't much parents don't learn.
In Nebraska, a fully preserved pre-
historic tooth has been found. Some
tooth paste firm will be advertising
he used their product.
Electricity travels 100000 miles
a minute. You would never guess it
ran the Phoenix street cars.
Some men tell their wives every
thing that happens and some tell
them even more than that.
Ford's ambition was to make a
30 cent watch; but he found it would
run. so he called il a car.
Burning rubbish yourself is better
than selling to cigar makers.
The only reliable sign of better
times is Help Wanted" sign.
Knickerbockers for women are not
going much. 1t looks like as If they
are on their last legs now.
Proposed tariff on roofing won't
reduce the overhead in building.
They have found singing fish in
the ocean. Probably the result OF
pouring booze overheard.
The equipment of every photogra-
pher should include bathing suits.
II is amusing to see an old bache-
lor holding a baby. and doubly so if
she isn't eighteen.
They call it shortcake because it
doesn't last long.
Charlie Chaplin's latest film Pay
day was cut to two reels. All pay
days are short these days.
Doctors get by because they have
inside information
Some men are so cautious they
have inside information.
Some men are so cautious they
cane buy gold fish without worrying
over its turning to brass.
Many a chicken. wise as an owl
is taken for a lark and acts like
goose say the old hens.
In Georgia, the wind picked up a
load of corn and carried 1t to town
May have been a trade wind.
Our criticism OF the street car
service is that the cars usually are
going the wrong way.
Conan Doyle tells US what heaven
is like. Cuss your wife's folks to find
what hell is like.
Russia wants to trade old debts
for new debts.
Scientists say they have found
traces of the missing link in Bryans
old state. People just won't leave
him alone.
A woman's idea of being bad is
sometimes better than her husbands
!, Z