The Washington times., 1922-11-12

WAYS, searching Tor tIpe SUM
ciently base and Infamous to
serve your ends!
DRAKE (uith malicious prtdC)-l
have found a jewel! A woman
known as Tiger.Lily-as familiar
to the slums of New York as she
Is TO the Seven Dials of London.
Her husband. Wo Hop Sing, Is an
o,ium smuggler. rather fancy
he is Chinese.
EIENORE-A feloA. A notorious
character! And YOU dare
(Tbe dODrbrH riDgS.)
DRAKE-Speaking Of angels. !
believe she is here! say, YOU
won't mind II rush upstairs and
change my tie, will YOU; She
thinks that blond men should al.
ways wear blue.
(Ddshcs DUfJ
ELENORE tdiOm) - I'm almost
tempted to receive her--l'm in a
raging temper. But n"-~l'd bet
ter not | might strike her. And
these vicious creatures are fully
capable of self.defense.
fETitS bUrriPdlB)
BUTLER lat dOrWdN)-Mr. and
Mrs. WO Hop Sing.
(Tigcr.Lily enters. She wedrS
bird-Of. f.pdrddiSe trdfh'rS, SDiled
ermine. hoop earrings. french
sandals and baby stdrc. Her
knees are bare and Sh' cdrries a
cane. she is foIIoW"d bV NO
Hop Sing, n middlc-dJed. schOlds.
tic looking ChinGmdn H horn
trimmed spectdcIes ana g"rgeOus
Mandarin rcO0lid.)
WO HOP SING tina maiestically)-l
am distressed, People turned to
stare at MS upon the street. |
fear II Is because my Lotus.
Flower is dressed in so immodest
a fashion.
TIGER.LILY-Sweet daddy!
WO HOP SING-My chief objec.
tion is that il makes my temp
tress =, untempting. scarcely
recognize my Silver-Moth in So
coarse a guise. II you continue to
ape the m des of your shameless
American sisters feel my affec.
tion for YOU will become speedily
introspective.
TIGER-LILY--II"t dog!
mrs. MOstyn enters. fOllored
by tucO repoyters. WO Hop Sing
makes prof"Wnd inclination OF
his magnificent person. Tiger
LIN drdrs a mdtch frrm her sock
AMI HDbfs cigdreftc.J
MRS. MOSTYN-More eXtraordi
nary visitors, My house has be.
come meeting place for the
curious. pray-whO may this
bizarre pair be?
FIRST REPORTER feTplOsiUclV-
Well! II it isn't Tiger.Lily with
her playmate. Chop-Suey.
MRS. MOSTYN-How extremely
rHoco,
SECOND REPORTER--Meet the
Continental Kid. Mrs. Mostyn.
This is Tiger-Lily, the Pride of
Chinatown. We only write about
her in asterisks and speak her
name in whispers.
WO HOT SING ('oftily)-Names
that are whispered are always
best known.
MRS. MOSTYN taintly)-This is
much more than | bargained for.
wO HOP SING-Madam! A thou
sand salutations! ] have the
honor to present my wife-the
hitherto unrecognized twin sister
Of your ward.
MRS. MOSTYN (aghdst)-There
must be some mistake.
FIRST REPORTER fproducing a
Oddk)-Will you he god enough
to form a family group: Wen
use the story FIR a double spread!
SECOND REPORTER (ercitedIU-
Oh. lead me to a telephone!
MRS. MOSTYN tsharply)-Stop!
Do not anticipate history, gentle
men. utterly repudiate this
woman's claim!
WO HOP SING-Here are identifi-
cation papers from the Found.
ling's Home.
MRS. MOSTYN-I know these
documents are forged!
FIRST REPORTER faimtn0 koddk)
Now, II you'll bunch together,
please. II Mrs. Sing will lean
her head on Mrs. Mostyn,s
shoulder
MRS. MOSTYN-What impertin.
ence! forbid you to take my
picture with this person! Sooner
would I he photographed with the
head of Me,lusa!
FIRST REPORTER fconsolingiv
A scandal Is as good as monu.
ment, dear madam.
SECOND REPORTER-Even the
famous seek notoriety In order
to become we'll known.
FIRST REPORTER-Many a social
leader would sink into obscurity
but for the celebrated vices Of
her relatives.
MRS. MOSTYN (angrilD)-I de-
cline to invest in a family skele-
ton for the purpose Of becoming
notable! I denounce this woman
as a fraud!
wO HOP SING tblandly)-Your