The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1922-05-09
"Are You Sure It Amt All a Dream?"

that We'll wake, up some day and find
that we're still in the green-pea trade ;
that all these months we've been asleep
under n cabbage leaf, communin' with
potato bugs?"
Not for minute" replied the COM
modore. "Why, got d zen matched
pearls here that's fit for. queen. Big,
rcd, pear-shaped boys-regular bleed
in hearts. There's ten thousand each
In them alone"
"WelI, Ill--1Il brew some grog,"
gasped Captain Scmggs, ,and departed
forthwith to the galley. Fifteen min
utcs later he returned with kettle
of his favorite nepenthe and all three
adventures drank to a. bon voyage
home At the conclusionso Of the toast
Mr. McGuffcy set down his glass,
wiped his mouth with the back Of his
hairy hand and thus addressed the
syndicate.
''ln leavin' this paradise Of the South
Pacific" he began, 1--WE find that we
have accumulated other wealth. besides
the loot below decks. 1 refer to his
roya! highness, the king of Kandavu,
and his prime minister, Tabu-Tabu.
When these two outlaws was first cap
tured, / informed the syndicate that l
would scheme out punishment be-
flttn' their crime. to-wh-,nuruerin'
an eatin' you two boys. It's been a
ixr ir|> nd <u1- tiyn0
no: bein' blessed with quite as fine an
imagination rs our friend, Glib. How
ever, pride myself that hard work al
ways brings success. und'I am ready to
announce what disposition shall be
made Of these two interestin' speci'
mems Of aboriginal life. I beg to an
nounce, gentlemen. that I\havc invent
ed Il punishment fittin' tlle' crime"
'lmpcssble." said Captain Scraggs.
"Shut up. Scraggs," struck in Com
modore Chimney. "Out with it, Mac.
What's the program?"
II move you, members of'the syndi-
cate, :Ent the schooner Maggie II pro-
coed to some barren, uninhabited
island, and that upon arrival there
this savage king and his still more
savage subject be taken ashore in n
small boat. I also move you, gentle
men of the syndicate. that inasmuch
as the two aggrieved parties, a. P.
Gibney and r. Scrnggs. having in a
sperrit Of mercy refrained from layin'
their hands on said prisoners for fear
Of invulidin' them at Il time when their
services was Of Importance to the ex-
petition, be given an opportunity to
take out their grudgp OH the persons
of said savages. Now, I notice that
the king is miserable, skinny. sawed
off and hammered-down old cove. BY
all the rules Of the prize ring he's in
Scraggsy's class" (Here Mr.. McGuf.
fey flashed lightning wink to the
commodore. It was an appeal for Mr..
Gibney's moral support in the engi-
tain Scragss. and thus relieve the
tedium Of the homeward trip. Mr..
Gibney Instantly tclegraphed his ap-
probation, ard McGuffey continued.)
Il notice also that If was to hunt the
universe over, l couldn't find Il better
match for Glib than Tabu-Tabu. And
as we are all agreed that the white
race IS superior to any race on earth,
and it'll do us all good to see fine
mill before we leave the country.
move you. gentlemen of the syndicate,
that we pull Off finish fight between
Scrnggsy and the king, and Glib and
TabuTabu. III referee both contests
, and at the conclusion Of the mixup
Wen leave these two murderers ma
rooned on the island and then"
Continued in Next lss-e)