The Washington herald., 1922-01-11
CHINATOWN JOSS
FOR YAP WAGON
TOURISTS ONLY
M'Intyre Tells of Gloem
There During Early
Morning Hours.
By o. o. M'INrYRE.

"S tho hhoThiuk uouTo. DfoWh-
ish-yellow figures. arms crossed in
Tapping sleeves. shuttle along close
to buildings habit bred from
tong war fear. Many are just back
from the fantasies of the black
smoke" into the material slough.
The shops are lifeiess and the
chop suey caravansaries ghostly in
their eerie hush. Timid little
Chinese children play silently and
with pathetic aimlessness along the
understanding wide-eyed and
shrinking at the Occidental face.
Little frame houses along Pell
and Doyer with their faded green
shutters have the blinds down un-
til mid d-afternoon. In these sham
bles live white women who have
cast their unhappy lot with the
lees Of China to make poppy their
god.
There is not the rattle OF a We
hicle In the narrow. crooked streets
and the only light is the purple
haze that giows dimly at the en-
trance of the joss house-a joss
house incidentally for yap wagon
tourists.
Now and then there Is the sound
of muffled gesticulation and strange
expletives sceping up from the un-
derground passages that honey.
comb this bit of the Orient. run
ming Off the hip OF Chatham Square.
Perhaps a hop head" with a few
erish morning yen"
Tn front ~ ha Cafa
which used to be Mike Salter's
place. where the now opulent Irv-
ing Berlin once pounded the ivories
sprawled on the doorstep asleep.
1t was "old Horse and Wagon" the
only Chinese ever docketed for beg
ging in Gotham
Around by the Port Arthur res
taurant a lone and fiercely mus
tachioed Italian listened to the
morning serenade Of shrill street
band. The elevated trains. spun
high in the clouds. shriekcd and
the hooves OF dray horses against
road. Park Row. filled with its
noisy lunch hour crowds-and
Chinatown slept sluggishly' on.
sy HlDOiiC VI IT'S HdNlNe ldHu.
1t was afternoon tea time in one
of those smart restaurants. A
young man with patent leather hair
Joined a group of young men and
women. He shot a wicked cuff and
was just bulging with merry quips.
1t was evident that he was not
welcome. but they were trying to
tolerate him. He began to rub
neryes raw. however. that was
plain.
He turned to one sophisticated
lady and inquired: "Sweetie, may
smoker"
Smoker" she said with whitening
scorn. why, I don't care II you
burn"
In all the years have been In
New York ] have never seen a silver
dollar. The aversion TO the silver
dollar is one of the city's secrets. A
waiter feels insulted II one Is given
to him. Taxicab drivers refuse
them when they are offered by
Westerners.
Speaking of menus. In another
cafe one of those big-hearted
Otises who rub their hands and
beam when the waiter approaches,
told the charming young lady op-
posite that when she got through
looking over the hot groceries on
the bill OF fare he was going to
suggest something he knew would
please her taste. What you wan,
to start with" he said. "fs some
OF those horse doves"
In stroll over West Forty-sec-
ond street. covering four blocks.
three tattered men approached
with cap, can I speak to you a
minute?" In each case an inquiry
was made as to why a resort had
been made to street begging. The
answers varied. The first had lost
his job. the second was a war vet
eran, and the third because he
needed money to buy his wife
medicine. One longs for the old
fashioned beggar who states frank
ly that he wants money to buy a
shot OF hooch.
Zen Welch bravely carries on. In
a vaudeville theater the other night
] saw him led out to a bench where
in the stark blackness that Is his
he drove his audience to uproarious
1aughter-laughter with Jumps in
the throat. And when in his char
acterization of the East Side ped
dler he touched a note Of pathos
his audience sobbed in unison. At
the end of his act they came and
led him off. The encore came.
Hands could be seen turning him
about facing the stage and he
Yiddish Jig and started off in a
wrong direction for his exit. The
curtain mercifully fell y
I was in a theatrical office the
other afternoon when one of the
composers of Tin Pan Alley was
announced. He said he had another
hit. The producer motioned him to
the piano to play it over. 1t was
a syncopated melody reeking with
jazz. At the finish the producer
said I'll take it." And before the
composer left the room he had an
advance check for 5000. Those
things are not happening often. hut
to me il was impressive. The
young COMPOSER is not more than
25. With his song in a first class
New York production he stands to
make a fortune in a year providing.
OF course, that the song finds popu-
lar response. Composing popular
Songs is very much like prospect
ing for gold. Sometimes you strike
pay dirt and more often you are
on the verge of actual hunger.