The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1922-03-08
TOPEKA STATE JOURNAL
Information Bureau
FREDERIC ,. HAsKIN, Director.
Washington. d. Q.
CENsoREn roNBsroNEs.

very grave. The latest thing IN CEN
4 sors, according to a serious minded
trade journal which keeps up with
tombstone news, is a censor of epi-
taphs. This official has been appointed
. in an unnamed English village and
entrusted with the job of seeing that
graveyard solemnity is not violated by.
+ flippant quips and epigrams on the
tombstones-
! English Wears for a number of years
have supervised to some extent tomb
stone sentiments. 1t may seem
strange that now, when epitaphs' are
no longer INDUCED in by poets or
! poetasters, there should be any great
3 need for a special guardian of tomb
stone dignity. But the dangers, it
seems. are in the epitaphs which have
| been perpetrated in the past. Graved
on old, moss grown, tottering stones,
the verses of a century or two ago
oftentimes express sentiments regard
ing death and the dead that are flip
pant, irreverent, and in short, unsuited
for public perusal in this highly reg
ulated age.
Our attitude toward tombstones un-
doubtedly has changed. 1t is not so
much that we think more solemnly of
death; but rather that we think less
of it The churchyard is seldom the
graveyard any longer. Few people
think of visiting the cemeteries out
side the city when they set out for a
Sunday afternoon stroll. Decidedly,
the dead are not so much with US as
they were a few centuries, or even a
few generations, back.
Tombstone Topic of Talk.
Then. tombstones were a live topic.
A man expected to have an epitaph
written about him, and if there was
fear in his mind that his relatives
would not make a good job of it, he
wrote the label for his stone himself
or hired a professional to write one
Ben Jonson, Milton, and Pope wrote
epitaphs- Shakespeare wrote his own
epitaph in a four-line verse of warn
ing to any who might wish to disturb
his bones To dash off q. witty epitaph
for a friend or enemy was a parlor
trick with which kings and courtiers
whiled away a dull afternoon.
Thus when Charles II casually asked
Rochester TO write his epitaph. the
duced the following now famous lines:
Here lies our mutton-eating king.
Who never said foolish thing,
And never did wise one.
The king took no offense. but set his
brains to work and composed a second
stanza:
If death could speak. the king would say,
In justice to his crown,
His acts they were the minister's,
His words they were his own.
Even if man was inadvertently
misplaced, he had to have a tombstone
and an epitaph, as is shown by the
following in an English churchyard;
Underneath this sod lies John Round
found.
Rhyme or Free Verse.
Epitaphs were correct style and ev-
whose outstanding deeds and charac-
teristics could not be squeezed into
rhymed eouplets were gloriously i'm
mortaiized in free verse. Lady
J, 10,
Here lies the body of
Great niece of Burke. commonly
Called the sublime.
Bland. passionate. and deeply religious;
Also painted in water-colors,
And sent several pictures to the
She was first cousin to Lady Jones.
And of such in the kingdom Of heaven.
But those days are gone. Poets no
longer specialize in epitaphS. Hen
pecked husbands get even by some
other means than by writing sarcastic
verses to go on tom bstones. The cpl
taph, which started off well in this
country in the graveyards of Massa- |
chusetts, is practically defunct.
Still. the possibilities of epitaph re-
form, even in this country, should not
be overlooked Like England, we have
ample material which should be of
interest to censors in our old New
England churchyards. The verse
tation in the English village is on an
old stone. We quote it now. In flu
ture, it may be permissible to desig- |
nate it only by four rows of dots:
Here lies the body of Mary Ann Lowder |
Who burst from drinking a seidIitz powder. |
Called from this world to her heavenly |
She should have waited till 1t efferveseed.
Danger of Levity Less
The danger of the public catching I
the idea that death is not to be taken /
seriously is less now, to be sure, than /
when promenades IN the graveyard |
were a popular outdoor sport. Still, /
the old grinning. chuckling epitaphs /
are there Iegible under the CRIME, to |
corrupt anybody who strays into their |
neighborhood.
in Iowa. written on stone for dignified |
and sober-minded middle westerners
to read:
Beneath this stone our baby lays,
He neither cries nor hollers.
He lived just one and twenty days
And cost us forty dollars.
Or consider that admired and copied /
verse by some unknown English poet:
Here lies my wife,
Here lies she,
Hallelujah
Hallelujee!
The effect of such epitaphs on the /
public is obviously demoralizing. In /
the future we may have a national /
censor of epitaphs to see that covers
are made for all epftaphs which do 1
tons for tombstone literature. Or
possibly the epitaph official will |
gather together a collection of for
hidden tombstones and keen them in a /
locked and guarded graveyard mu
scum.
Ar,-vax- A. r--o1f-t, ..sr1..z -.