davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington times., 1922-08-20

THE play was Julius Caesar"
and no expense had been
spared In the production. But
the effect Of the assassina alton
scene was spoiled when the trick
dagger refused to work, and n
Brutus frantically jabbed the un-
fortunate Caesar with the obdu-
rate weapon voice from the gal
lsry remarked In q calm, inter
ested voicei
obi me, but 'e's toughw
The Washington times., 1922-08-20

when I went into the pantry to
get Q tart"
What were you afraid Off"
II was afraid I would not find
the tart"
The Washington times., 1922-08-20
Heard Along Broadway

COUNTRY EDITOR (out West)
" This has been q lucky day
for me.
Faithful Wife-Has some one
been In to pay . subscription
Editor-Well, no, It wasn't 50
lucky as that; but was shot at
and missed.
The Washington times., 1922-08-20

EDITH-I'm swfuIly afraid Of
- the waves.
Gwen-If I wore such q bath
ing suit as you, dear, the only
wave I'd fear would be a moral
one.
The Washington times., 1922-08-20

AuoAO hoio VI icss al . PASSe Va
lingerie.
For the guide Of mariners who
are compelled to negotiate the
street, the local weather bureau
announces that It will be high tide
ON Main Street at noon to-mor-
row.
Come to our sale Of sport
skirts tomorrow an you will
know what real delight savin' Is.
Adv. Main Street Dry Goods EN-
porium-
} OWN TO the trend toward BAN
ditry, rumor has It that the meat
express on the railroad Is just
packed with Armour and even
moves Swift. We believe this Is
some beef, although the story was
started by the engineer Of tho
train himself.
One Of our local authors who
writes jokes for the comic papers
is havin' his seudy done over in
brown; some folks might call II .;
chestnut. +.
Mebbe II some Of these mar.
ried danes who have trouble;
keepin' their husbands home,
nights could arrange to have
somebody else's husband drop;
aroun' evenin's. their own spouse
would hang aroun' the house
more.
Have you seen our new color
the "Ghost Of Romeoi" It's .
soft shade-Adv. Main Street
Dry Goods Emporium.
According to the doin's Of the
pages In court circles when
knighthood was in flower they
were the first originators Of the
loose-page system.
Some one started q rumor that
Danny Green had a new auter-
mobeel, q twin six, but Danny
says that such are not the trus
facts. He had one Of his twins
sick an he sposes that that's how
the cruel rumor started, which
brought the sheriff down on him
with several new attachments for
autos.
Never say dye when your credit
is good with US for q new dress.
One dollar down and one dollar
semi-eventually. - Adv. Main
Street Credit Clothing Emporium.
A touchin' incident happened
IN what was once the barroom Of
the Railroad Hotel last evenin'.
Some one suddenly flashed . bot
tie Of Scotch on the unsuspectin'
gang, an there wasn't q dry I in
the place, but there were q lot Of
dry mes
There was very pathetic
scene down In the once-was bar
room Of the Railroad House last
Saturday. Somebody produced q
real flask Of whiskey an there
weren't q dry I in the place, not,
10 say anythin" about dry mes.
Manager Turner has had q per-
manent waive put on Pitcher 'Tn-
curve Ike" Of the local team. The
manager says he realizes that
youth must have It's fling, but
after . guy fings 1t over the
rrandstand twice that's enough
for him.
A Gentle Hint.
The Washington times., 1922-08-20

MRS. SHoRTLEY was discus
AVA sing the latest fashions with
q young lady caller.
"Did you say your husband
was fond Of those clinging
gowns, May7"
"Yss; he likes one to cling to
me for about three years"
The Washington times., 1922-08-20

10 no higher In June than In any
other month, but the cost Of low
ing is. II you are q June-bug
CHATS q June brides husband)
just imagine you're Q lightning
bug and make light Of it; you
can't 60 wrong with . wife to
guide you. Ask mothsrj she
knows.
Yes, Smoky, some men smoke
rope because they prefer to be
choked to death with It that way
instead Of the other way. II I
ever hear Of you dying from ma
turai causes I'll know you've BEEN
hung. Yet, II would be too bad
to see you "cut down" right In
the prime Of your hfel
No, Tomasso, "stick-up' man
Is not necessarily . bill-poster,
although 1t may look that way
from the road. A stick-up man
Is . hophead who thinks tho
world owes him living and, hsv-
ing the disposition Of . bill col
lector, he hits you over the head
with q piece Of lead-pips. This
clearly shows you that We should
carry our brains In our pockets
and our money In our heads.
Yes, Wildroot, . history Of
Hank Ford's life could be truth.
fully called an autobiography.
Henry was not only Q pioneer In
the auto business but also of the
fiivver epidemic. 'Tis said a man
has to take a lot Of hard bumps
in this world and Ford has proved
it Hope you are one Of the few
who take their hard bumps stand
ing up.
No, Trouble, q merry wsg Is
rot necessarily a woman's tongue;
hats merely q wag without the
merry. They say q woman has
no sense Of humor, but II that's
true why does she marry q man?
The answer is, she must marry a
man if she. marries at ell, and as
troubles never come singly she
knows there won't be any II she
don't double up.
Yes, Squaw-Face, the red man
has rs much right to Sioux for
Jivorce as anybody. II you're
married to an Indian fiapper and
can't keep house because she
gads, whip her with the gad.
Then she'll sue you for divorce
and you will be free to make o
fool Of yourself anyway you
please-probsbly by getting mar
ried again.
No, Fremont, Newspaper car
toonists don't get their insp!ra-
tions for female figures from
snapshots Of society women at
the beach-although they could.
1t seems funny that wealthy fe-
males always look ~ though they
couldn't afford to eat enough.
one7piece bathing suits look bet
ter Non clothes-lines than on
clothes-horses.
Yes, Sourmash. II your doctor
advises you to drink freely With
your meals he should follow the
advice with . prescription % you
can get the stuff to drink. OF
course, he may mean wateri but,
to be on the safe side you take
II for granted he don't and don't
drink It. Water II . dangerous
thing; lots Of people have bean
drowned In 1t.
T.
The Washington times., 1922-08-20

Manager Turner has had per-
manent waive put on Pitcher 'In-
curve Ike" Of the local team. The
manager says he realizes that
youth must have It's fling, but
after . guy filings 1t over the
rrandstand twice that's enough
for him.
The Washington times., 1922-08-20

81 AM afraid, DOCTOR" said Mrs.
Harding, "that my husband
has some terrible mental afflic-
tion. Sometimes talk to him
for hours and then discover that
he hasn't heard a word"
THAT isn't an affliction,
madam" was the weary reply.
That's q gift"
The Washington times., 1922-08-20

There was . very pathetic
scene down In the once-was bar
room Of the Railroad House last
Saturday. Somebody produced q
real flask Of whiskey an there
weren't q dry I in the place, not
10 say anythin" about dry mes.
The Washington times., 1922-08-20
ttJ AM not afraid of the dark,
mamma

mamma"
mo, OF course NJ, dear"
II was . little afraid once,
The Washington times., 1922-08-20

Come to our sale Of sport
skirts tomorrow an you will
know what real delight savin' Is.
Adv. Main Street Dry Goods EN-
porium-
The Washington times., 1922-08-20

OWN TO the trend toward ban
ditry, rumor has It that the meat
express on the railroad Is just
packed with Armour and even
moves Swift. We believe this Is
some beef, although the story was
started by the engineer Of tho
train himself.
The Washington times., 1922-08-20

According to the doin's of the
pages In court circles when
knighthood was in flower they
were the first originators Of the
loose-page system.
The Washington times., 1922-08-20

A touchin' incident happened
IN what was once the barroom Of
the Railroad Hotel last evenin'.
Some one suddenly flashed . bot
tie Of Scotch on the unsuspectin'
gang, an there wasn't q dry I in
the place, but there were q lot Of
dry mes
The Washington times., 1922-08-20
Yes and No
BY Len Fleming

/ES, Irishsr, when Cork gets
Y 10 popping II sure sounds
like q wild party opening
champagne-oT . sham battle.
You can't keep the Irish down
it's like sitting on q hornets nest.
When the Irish get what they
want there won't be enough Of
'em left to provide policemen for
America. Somebody made Amer
lea safe for democracy just like
the Irish are making Ireland safe
for Republicans. ...
No, Benedict, the cost Of LIVING
10 no higher in June than in any
other month, but the cost Of low
ing is. II you are q June-bug
CHATS q June brides husband)
just imagine you're q lightning
bug and make light of It; you
can't 60 wrong with . wife to
guide you. Ask mother, she
knows.
The Washington times., 1922-08-20
Rural Editors
Scrap Basket
: NOCKERS Of our town say
that the high jinks bein'

II NOCKERS Of our town say
N that the high jinks bein'
carried on in our principal
street just 60 to show that Main
Street Is fast becomin' the route
Of all evil, They complain that
since the city boarders are max
IN their appearance in our midst
that that agency Of Satan, the
Main Street soda fountain, is
bein' kept open till nine o'clock.
MAYBELLE-To remove ink
stains from . lingerie shirt waist,
Just lay the garment carefully
on piece Of white cloth an take
. sharp pair Of scissors In your
right hand an cut out the piece
which has the ink stain on. The
operation may leave q hole In the
shirt waist, but the ink stain will
never come back, an what's one
more hole or less in a piece Of
lingerie.
For the guide Of mariners who
are compelled to negotiate the
street. the local weather bureau
announces that It will be high tide
ON Main Street at noon to-mor-
row.
The Washington times., 1922-08-20

One Of our local authors who
writes jokes for the comic papers
is havin' his seudy done over in
brown; some folks might call II o
chestnut.
The Washington times., 1922-08-20

Have you seen our new color
the "Ghost Of Romeoi" It's q
soft shade-Adv. Main Street
Dry Goods Emporium.
The independent-reporter. [volume] (Skowhegan, Me.) 1909-1955, 1922-09-21
PALMYRA

Friends in town of Alvin Parkman
will be grieved to hear that he Is
critically i'll at his home in Newport.
Mrs. Helen Hall of Millinocket is
the guest of her brother Lewis Pray.
Mr.. and Mrs. Manner Turner visited
relatives in Exeter, Sunday.
Herbert Peterson has recently pur-
chased Ford car.
Miss Helen Savage went to Water
Vile, Saturday, where she will enter
Colby College.
Mr.. and Mrs. Lewis Hanson, with
their guests, Mr.. and Mrs. Stole, of
Windham, Mass, were visitors in
Bangor, Thursday.
Miss Emma Thompson of Glenburn
is visiting her sister, Mrs. Earl Park
man.
Elwood Nickerson and family of
Corinna have moved into the rent of
J. B. Lampher.
Miss Thelma Littleheld teacher
in the Bath high school, was week
end visitor at the home of her pa
rents, Mr. and Mrs. H. d. Littlefield.
iAp1Ds61sNA<NAe8ak~~Sd &ssSahAft tsteSz2Sa1astA
The independent-reporter. [volume] (Skowhegan, Me.) 1909-1955, 1922-09-21
1H1aI r. H4)4>4,M.>

why every citizen of Maine should be
Interested in this matter. but the
most important consideration, so far
as inland points are concerned, per-
tains to the cold storage plant which
it is proposed to build at this pier.
If this project is carried out in an ex-
tcnsivc way it will enable producers
in the inland counties To ship apples,
potatoes, vcgE Gables, poultry, meat,
products, eggs, etc, for cold storage.
Modern business methods permit the
issuance of warehouse receipts in
such q way that a producer can raise
funds upon them to about 80 per cent
of their value. This will enable a
producer to finance his operations in
such a way that he can await favor
able market.
This is no soft snap this member
ship on the State Pier Commission
Mr. Bunker often times drives from
North Arson to Skowhegan, takes the
4 As a. m train, works with the Com
mission for six or seven hours In Port
land and returns to his home by the
late train and automobile to North
Arson the same evening. Mr.. Bun
ker believes that practically all oil
the pier facilities will be available by
January /.
The independent-reporter. [volume] (Skowhegan, Me.) 1909-1955, 1922-09-21

ertheless, hence arises orr deep in
terest in Names Million Dollar Pier
now nearing completion on the Port
land waterfront
Few of our readers are aware of the
fact that this great project is under
the care of a Commission of five peO-
pie. one of whom, Hon. +, w Bun
ker resides In Somerset County. This
commission appointed by Governor
Milliken. August l, 1919 is made NJ
as follows: Henry r. Merrill, chair
man; James Q. Gulnae, secretary
Alexander 7. Laughlin, Fred W.
Bunker. Bertram e. McIntire, mem
bcrs. The Legislature of Maine appro-
prlated $1,150,000 for the project and
by referendum vote this was approx
ed by the people of Maine at the Sept
ember election Of 1915. BY the terms
of the appropriation the city of Port
land was to furnish the pier site, and
that municipality has bought and paid
for the necessary frontage at Il cost oil
$350.000, and decided the same to tho
State of Maine. It has so far pro
crossed that part of the pier is al
ready in use by the Maine Ste3msliI
Company at an annual rental of $25,
600.
A So foot ship channel 1900 feet
The independent-reporter. [volume] (Skowhegan, Me.) 1909-1955, 1922-09-21

wide enters Portland Harbor, the dis
lance being only three miles from
the open sea. This channel Is dred-
ged out to and including the frontage
of the new pier. The pier itself is
one thousand feet long and $3.50 feet
wide. The channel above referred
to viii permit every ship now afioat
save one to load and discharge at
Names new pier. II should be
borne in mind that Portland is one
day nearer European points than Bos-
ton and two days nearer than New
York. This gives that seaport and
the entire state an extraordinary adj
vantage over seaports to the south
and west on the Atlantic coast. These
new facilities will so economize the
handling of freight as to reduce ap-
probably the cost of all materials go
ing and coming by water via Port
land.
The above story is reason enough
The independent-reporter. [volume] (Skowhegan, Me.) 1909-1955, 1922-09-21
SkOWlIfGAN LOCALS

Mrs. Lucy A. Burton Of Pittsiield,
president of the Rebekah Assembly
of Maine arrived Tuesday evening to
attend Priscilla Rebekah Lodge and
visit with Miss Alice +. Danforth.
Mrs. Burton was going from here to
Stockholm.
Karl K. Philbrick has arrived home
from his extended European voyage,
during which he had the pleasure of
meeting Fl. Tobey Mooers, formerly of
this place. now American consul at
Lisbon, Portugal, in time to resume
his studies at Bowdoin College.
Miss Ivy Young S. II. S. t922 who
has been at Pleasant Pond this sum
mer has gone to Lewiston to enter
Bates College. Miss Young lived at
the home of DR.. Stinch6eld while at
tending high school and visited with
his family before going to Lewiston.
Philip Chapman. an employee of the
Skowhegan Pulp and Paper Company,
met with n painful injury last Monday
while working at pulp making ma
chine. The index and middle fingers
DtCdiilt tildh6iNh IL wv hIPhi fi''''''
tanning them to such an extent that
amputation of one at least is thought
probable.
Several patrons of the Skowhegan
Jersey Creamery have been ordered
to withhold their products as the re-
suit of the inspection OF Frank II.
Robinson of the Boston Board of
IJnaIIb Mr. DnhiDcnn nn big fnIIT
of inspection of the Creamery routes
suggests that each patron have a sep
arate milk room. white wash their
tieup and give an average light Of
four square feet for each COW. The
patrons are of course only asked to
withhold their products from the
creamery until such time as they com
ply with the requests of the inspector.
A teachers meeting was held Tues
day evening at the Municipal Build
ing with Supt. w. Il. Woodbury. presid-
ing. Technical matters were discus
sed and plans for groups of parent
meetings in the different schools were
considered classification of pupils
occupied considerable time due to var
ions changes since the closing of the
schools In the spring and the Lincoln
building is found to be oyercroWded
The relieving of this congestion is one
of the absorbing problems of the
school officials at the present time.
The high. school will have one ses-
sion daily during the Skowhegan fair
and the grade schools will be closed
for two afternoons of the fair,
The independent-reporter. [volume] (Skowhegan, Me.) 1909-1955, 1922-09-21
Helps Of Little Cost
(By Roland T. Patten

(By Roland T. Pattenl
A good deal of farming the,
is done with the typewriter.
agricultural papers and the
tural departments of dailies an
lies are full OF advice, often b,
written, but emanating from n
know very little about farm N
| have many times got down
knees and washed pig in aHl
solution to make sure he u
from lice. A man who has d
sort of thing and many other
jobs around a piggery ought
the privilege of writing il hd
to about hog raising | haVi
ed out the tie-up morning afts1
ing, MIXED and cared for St@I
farm. and yet feel mighty
done everything in fact Al
when | compare what ! real|
about it with the experiences
farmers whom | meet every dal
farming practice lasted for al
years. 1t was probably the |
five years OF my life, but sh1
he disposed to brag about N
financial point of view. | AZ
convinced, however, that some
which | followed were in theI
of true economy, and perhap5
be of benefit to my brother
but | am still proud of whai''|
tionship might be accorded mel
class. | mention them IN 4
what disconnected way, ana
show how they all may he \
work together for the success
farming enterprise.
The independent-reporter. [volume] (Skowhegan, Me.) 1909-1955, 1922-09-21
Change OF Time on NJ. C. II. X.

The rev time table on the skowhe-
gan branch of the NJ. c. r. r. becomes
effective next Sunday. The early
morning train aud the late evening
train VIII he taken off. Definite in
formation had not been received yes
terduy afternoon at the local head
quarters as to the departure and ar
rival of trains other than that the
noon train Will leave at 11.45 which
enables passengers to arrive In Dos
ton at 7 rs that evening.
The independent-reporter. [volume] (Skowhegan, Me.) 1909-1955, 1922-09-21
Somerset County's Seaport Best on AT.
lantic Coast

We speak of Augusta being at the
head of navigation of the Kennebcc
River. Perhaps it would not be
strictly correct to say that Somerset
County or any point farther inland
than the state capital was seaport
territory. Nevertheless. the products
of the region often go by water. and
many of the things We need come from
other states and from foreign coun-
tries by ocean freight. Few OF the
readers of the Observation-Disclosures
know that the port Of Portland is be
ing developed in way that Will add
several cents a bushel to The value Of
Somerset County potatoes, and that
will decrease the cost of the things
we have to import from other ports
of the world Such Is the fact new
The independent-reporter. [volume] (Skowhegan, Me.) 1909-1955, 1922-09-21
Much Interest In Bowling

Much interest is being manifested
in bowling this year and local fans
are looking forward to the match this
evening when fifteen enthusiasts Will
participate in roll off for prize in
tho Bowlodrome. Two new Bruins
wink alleys have been added, max
ing, we understand. one of the clean
est and most modern amusement
placcs of this kind in The state
The independent-reporter. [volume] (Skowhegan, Me.) 1909-1955, 1922-09-21
Rev. +. l.. Marsh Going to Sandwich
Massachusetts

Friends of Rev. and Mrs. E. L..
Marsh. formerly of Waterville but
very well known to Skowhegan peo-
pie will be interested to learn that
they are to establish their future
homo in Sandwich, Mass, where Mr.
Marsh will become pastor OF the Fed
Grated Church which is composed OF
the congregational, Unitarian and
Methodist parishes. MIR. Marsh mas
for "a long time been pastor OF Con-
gregational Church in Providence and
will not complete his duties there UNI
til the first of December.
The independent-reporter. [volume] (Skowhegan, Me.) 1909-1955, 1922-09-21
The independence Reporter hey Ring

This publication is not given to MAX
ing fake offers of any kind. When we
tell you that we have key ring with
registration service the actual value
of which is Sl00 or more and that it
is available to subscribers on the
merely nominal payment of 10c, we
are speaking in sober earnest rather
than fiction. The annoyance result
ing from the loss of bunch of keys
is very real. The danger of such a
loss. if the finder knows whose pre-
misses they give access to, is also
very real. Our method, by a sys-
tenn of serial numbers and registra-
ton, insures the return of the keys,
and cuts out the menace above re-
ferred to. Key ring and particu-
lars SEM ION approval If desired.
INDEPENDENT REPORTER CO
Mr.. and Mrs. Hugh Macdonald are
guests at the home of j. D. MacDon-
aid.
The independent-reporter. [volume] (Skowhegan, Me.) 1909-1955, 1922-09-21
Public Utilities Renders Decisions

A public hearing was held at the
offices of the Public Utilities Com
mission at 10 o'clock yesterday fore
noon to consider the application OF
the New Portland and Eustis Tele-
phone & Telegraph company for APP
prevail Of increase in capital stock
from $4,000 to 10000. Following the
hearing. the Comm ,sson approved
Tho incrpase.
The independent-reporter. [volume] (Skowhegan, Me.) 1909-1955, 1922-09-21
NJ.
Bull aesse Csrrsled =,

John A. Buckle,
Ledge LIE .ss, Hsas 8 at Dead SdI'PP1 Is.or
Of kinstleld and p a,tr, hsrbsu
Ledge House about , Who
covered a large bull moo. o'cloct
half mile below tina 7 .Iose abo,
perty. As the animal Iss J, aop'
b. his feet it was discovered , a
IN ,.,, some way been w vu saat
wing returned to the 'Tanded
and notified the pron rI Ledge
all the guests at the hour c.ot who
Mt. Riselew house to uus,elry
nsighbors and notified 1 amer VI
the game warden at Fl "rsaui
official with his DEAD ud''S ST.
went to the place In ssva @'s'
biIes. several d
|, Investigation showed ~
/, the animal had t bss,
iy wounded and was in I .
weakened condition. u cs,. aa'
pertinent showed the m %~.'o
quite docile and he wan moose s
ward the Ledge House, WY Rs
den Wright hoped to he wi. hnsa
him until he was able y, noe
the wooded mountains as % 'e
1t was : an unique and /.
procession that ensued ~
lead the line. The proyro. .A'
erned by his within. IA ~
sed, so followed the ass.m.l'
would stagger, on a few ~.
then pause to gain stren.,s
his stopping. so did in,,ss,
twenty odd people at his -.
the half dozen automobils.
up at. the rear. On siss,'
white buildings of the Led,s
establishment, the moose dss;s
he would strike across tho -
the forest. Warden Wright
to be baked after going ~
an exciting and withall val,
followed, lighted by the be,S'
the automobiles. The unarn'
ers were successful and The
moose was herded into the
of the Ledge House.
Warden Wright, Proprlsto,
ley and few other early ri,.
an opportunity next mornjn,
anime the wounds which fr'
manner the moose had suffer,
had been badly gashed on M
side of the right foreleg, and
antler was broken short of
base: the velvet was strin,
pendant from the other. IT,
be determined whether the ami
been struck by an automobiIs.
highway near where he was Al
or whether his battered condis
the result of n fight for su1
with another of his kind.
favored the latter as the mos
able cause of the wounds.
The process Of treating the
was to have taken place AID
breakfast hour. But the NIL
confinement or the half-nCh h
Monday morning had been" hes
medicine for the young buff
while there were none to obse|
quietly stepped over the corral
and headed back toward Ind
country to the westward.
John Buckley was more Or 4
gretful over the untimely def
and disclosed some of his parl
mulated plans for the care
moose and the entertainment
guests during the game seasd
fail: they included moving pict|
the animal IN action. and a
publicity for his famous re@l
$3.50 could not replace.
The independent-reporter. [volume] (Skowhegan, Me.) 1909-1955, 1922-09-21
Luther Hill Elliott, Jr. Born Yesterday

Mr.. and Mrs. Luther Hill Elliott OF
Eaton Mountain Farm are the parents
of little son born yesterday after
noon at Somerset Hospital He has
been named Luther Hill, Jr.