davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The patriot. (Glenmora, La.) 1918-1955, 1922-03-17
TOO MUCH FOR GRANDMOTHER
Mathematical Problem, Old Lady De-
cided, Was Something That "No
Fellow Could Understand"

The little girl at the elementary
school had been promoted to multi
plication and for her home work was
set the task of finding out how many
legs 400 normal horses possess. A bit
puzzled as how to work it out, in
the evening, as she sat with her exer-
else book in front of her, she called in
the services of her grandmother.
Lets see," said Grandma adjusting
her spectacles, lone hOrsell have four
legs, two eight, three twelve, four six
teen. five twenty" and then she
broke off. "How many horses did you
say?" she asked.
-Four hundred, granny" replied the
little girl.
Zee, child" said the old lady, shut
ting up the book, there isn't one liv-
ing could do that sum."-Edinburgh
Scotsman.
The patriot. (Glenmora, La.) 1918-1955, 1922-03-17
7;@! {]!|5 33AI s. :
FOE; ls||dESsS! AIRS SlliE2l 70 FINE linen
THOUGHT 1T LOOKED STRANGE
Odd Appearance Of Drug Store As
tonished Woman Customer, Until
the Clerk Explained Situation.

The woman needed three ounces a
tincture Of myrrh. Hurrying up tho
street her glance was caught by TIVE
mammoth bottles of apothecary Wa
ters and two swinging doors or
frosted glass.
Down she stepped-three steps
down-into as attractive q drug store
as she had seen. All was pure white
walls, dazzling piateglass mirrors.
cleaning soda water accessories and
row upon row of shelves filed with
bottles of ointments, camphors and.
medicinal remedies.
Three ounces of tincture of myrrh -
said the Woman to the clerk.
The clerk hurried out of sight ana
the Woman began to notice how queer
was the structure of this drug stare.
There were columns and pilasters
where there shouldn't have been any
The counter had peculiar bend to it,
Then a strange, prickly feeling came
over the Woman.
When the clerk finally appeared hse
explained cheerfully: used to he O
barroom, lady Chicago Journal.
The patriot. (Glenmora, La.) 1918-1955, 1922-03-17
American Valuation i'm the Tariff Bill

Representative Joseph w. Ford
ney of Michigan just can't keep out
Of the limelight these days. He's
chairman of the house ways and
means committee and that's the com
mittee which has to hustle and find
a way to get the wherewithal for a
soldiers bonus and things like that.
And of course he's in deep in all the
tariff legislation that comes along.
A row between the house and
senate over American valuation was
forecast after 1t became known that
Republican members of the senate
finance committee, in rewriting the
so-called permanent tariff bill, had
agreed tentatively on continuing the
present principle Of basing duties on
foreign market value.
Chairman FOrdney of the house
ways and means committee, declared
that if this kind of a tariff measure
was passed by the senate the house
would write new bill with an Ameri-
The patriot. (Glenmora, La.) 1918-1955, 1922-03-17
Woes of Bottonley of John Bull Fame

Americans presumably are not sor-
rowing to any great extent over the
troubles Of Horatio Bottomley, einde-
pendent member of parliament and
former editor of a rabid anti-Ameri-
can weekly called John Bull. The
way he used to abuse Uncle Sam and
all things American was really quite
nasty, v know.
Extraordinary allegations were
made by Reuben Bigland against Bot
tomley. Bigland swore that in order
to pay him $500 which he owed him,
Bottomley arranged that the third
prize, amounting to $1,000, in war
stock combination" run by John Bull
should be awarded to a nominee of
Bigiand's.
This testimony was given by Big
land as his defense against the charge
of blackmailing Bottomley which was
brought against him at the Shrop-
shire Assizes. Biglands was acquit-
ted after the jury had been out a
The patriot. (Glenmora, La.) 1918-1955, 1922-03-17

Houston, Texas. ~ consider DR..
Pierce's Favorite Prescription a won
derful tonic for women. 1t has been
of especial benefit to me during moth
erhood, and recommend it very
highly to other young mothers. Mrs.
Willie McNeely, 2213 Chestnut Street.
Don't wait moment if you're weak
but procure this Prescription of DR..
Pierce's, in tablets or liquid, at your
nearest drug store. If you are troubled
write DR.. Pierce, President Inyalids'
Hotel in Buffalo, N. Y, and receive
good medical advice in return, free of
all expense.
The patriot. (Glenmora, La.) 1918-1955, 1922-03-17
DYED HER DRAPERIES,
SKIRT AND A SWEATER
WITH DIAMOND DYES"

Each package of Diamond Dyes con.
tains directions SO simple that any woman
can dye or tint faded, shabby skirts,
dresses, waists, coats, sweaters, stock
ings, hangings, draperies, everything like
new. Buy Diamond Dyes"-no other
KIND perfect home dyeng is guaFan
Tell your druggist whether the material
you wish to dye is wool or silk, or whether
it is linen, cotton, or mixed goods. Dia.
mond Dyes never streak, spot, fade, or
run. So easy to use.-advertisement.
The patriot. (Glenmora, La.) 1918-1955, 1922-03-17
Political Ten Commandments for Women

Mrs. John Hays Hammond, wife Of
the famous mining engineer and one
of the leaders in the National Wom-
ans Foundation, is out with politi-
cal decalogue for women. Her car
dinal principle as expressed in her
second commandment" Is that women
should affiliate themselves with some
party. Briefly her commandments are:
l. Women must not remain In old
ruts, but must press forward.
2. Party government Is necessary
to awaken responsibility and get
things done. A free lance gets mo-
where.
3. We must make organization a
means to an end, and never an end in
Itself.
A. We should unite with all forces
of good government to get rid of the
evil in the world and not waste our
energy scrapp:ng over nonessentials.
5. Let us try TO make our party
right. then support 1t intellectually.
a. 4l.1
The patriot. (Glenmora, La.) 1918-1955, 1922-03-17
Where Harems Were Cheap.

She-You refuse to buy me a single
hat, and then you tell me that while
you were in the Congo you had a
harem of half dozen wives. oh! la
la! How could you afford to pay for
the clothes of all those women?
The Returned SOldier-Oh, that
was easy. When they wished to dress
up, they simply put rings In their
noses.-La Regiment.
The patriot. (Glenmora, La.) 1918-1955, 1922-03-17
She Got the Name.

Mary" said the mistress, "did you
ask everyone for cards today, as told
you, when they called?"
"Yes'm. One fellah, he wouldn't give
me no card, but ] swiped his hat an
showed him off tn steps. Here's his
name on tn sweat band.
Times Dispatch.
The patriot. (Glenmora, La.) 1918-1955, 1922-03-17
MuHlers.

"The modern girl muffles and hides
her ears in her hair" says Uncle Jed,
''but from my observation she still
contrives to hear when man proposes
to her."
The patriot. (Glenmora, La.) 1918-1955, 1922-03-17

should
bill this unless
campaign
valuation said Fordney
committee which will
to a bill also based American valuation"
The patriot. (Glenmora, La.) 1918-1955, 1922-03-17
Seven New Plant Wonders From Burbank

Seven wonders Of the plant world
are Luther Burbank's 1922 cOntribu-
lions to horticultural science. Top
ping the list as an agricultural innova-
tion Of Importance is the "Opaline,"
an oat that hulls out like wheat when
threshed and, instead Of weighing 40
pounds to the bushel, weighs 60. This
result, Burbank explains, has been ac-
complished through the practical elm
ination of husk with incidental benefit
to the grain itself. His six, other
wonders he lists as follows:
Peruvian winter grass, which can
withstand frosts and produce an
enormous amount of feed during the
cold winter months, thus insuring
green feed for cattle.
A mammoth Towering artichoke,
with flowers as lovely as roses anu
several times as large.
A "prickly poppy known as the
Mariposa, which grows spines as does
a cactus.
The patriot. (Glenmora, La.) 1918-1955, 1922-03-17

1t doesn't matter if a father does
know less than his son-just so thaS
he is able to support him.
The patriot. (Glenmora, La.) 1918-1955, 1922-03-17

Cynicism is usually the second
growth in a man who has been ex-
cessively disappointed in himself.
The patriot. (Glenmora, La.) 1918-1955, 1922-03-17
Is That Cold and
Cough Hanging On?

YUU VIII be convinced that DR..
i Kings New Discovery does just
what it is meant to do-soothes cough
raw threats, congestion-tormented
chests, loosens the phlegm pack and
breaks the obstinate cold and grippe
attack, relieves the congestion in the
head. No harmful drugs, therefore
good for children as well as grownups.
Right away you will notice the
change for the better. Has a con-
vincing, healing taste that you will
appreciate. Buy bottle at any drug
gists on the way home tonight, 60c.
The patriot. (Glenmora, La.) 1918-1955, 1922-03-17

thony but bearing orange
cOlored
which Burbank declares
be ver perfected.
sunberry of the buckle
BURBERRY.
moncoored hybscus the molten fire
foNera nd new
The patriot. (Glenmora, La.) 1918-1955, 1922-03-17

If girl has fiery red hair it is .
sign that ali her acquaintance wils
tell her it is golden.
The patriot. (Glenmora, La.) 1918-1955, 1922-03-17

difficulties for months the
which financial competitions including the War stock
Bgland circulated
the financial integrity Of Bottomey.
The patriot. (Glenmora, La.) 1918-1955, 1922-03-17

The art of living consists in not be-
ing q dead One
The patriot. (Glenmora, La.) 1918-1955, 1922-03-17

Some bare-faced lies are old enough
TO wear full boards.
The patriot. (Glenmora, La.) 1918-1955, 1922-03-17


little background.
g. is ourd o citizens.
for better leaders whom when We find Them
must support.
10 We mus good
The patriot. (Glenmora, La.) 1918-1955, 1922-03-17
Not Diplomatic.

"Why did Miss Olden discharge her
butler?" "He boosted around that he
had grown gray in her service"
The patriot. (Glenmora, La.) 1918-1955, 1922-03-17

Push generally gets a pull.
The Farmington times., 1922-11-24
HIGH SCHOOL PARENTS
HOLD OPEN FORUM

A most important meeting and one
which should be far-reaching in its
effects, was held on Tuesday, Nov.
21, at 7:30 p. M, in the high school
auditorium, when the parents of the
high school pupils assembled at the
invitation of the faculty of the high
school and the Parent Teacher Asso-
ciation, to discuss problems vital to
the interest of the pupils and to the
well-being of the school as whole.
The meeting opened with the sing
ing of america, the Beautiful by
the assemblage. After the invocation
by Rev. w. S. Courtney, Miss Margar,-
ct Hunt gave a vocal number, with
Mrs. Arnold at the piano. The ad-
dress of the evening was then gwen
bv Superintendent Johns, in which he
spoke of the reasons for calling the
meeting. The Faculty of the high
school feel that an appeal must pc
made to the parents to enlist their
help in seeing that more time Is spent
| by the pupils in home preparation OF
their school work. Every pupil Is
carrying four hours work and unless
he gives at least three hours to pre-
naration, the speaker felt that he was
not preparing for the next days
class room work in an effective man
ner. 1t is impossible for the student
to give this amount OF preparation
to his next days work during school
hours, and, unless certain amount Of
home study is done regularly, the
child suffers not only in the grades
The Farmington times., 1922-11-24
Difficult to Get
Cases to Trial

This is the second week of circuit
court, and the same old difficulty ap-
pears to be ns much in evidence as
usual, if not more so, That is in the
matter Of bringing the cases up for
hearing. For this trouble 1t would
seem that the lawyers are principally
to blame, and it is the opinion Of
manuy that Judge Huck would be
clearly within his rights if he would
compel the cases to come up for trial
as they have been docketed, unless
really valid reason can be shown for
their continuance.
This method of procrastination
that has long been praeticed in the St.
Francois county court appears to
have become a habit with at least
some of the lawyers, and The Times
believes it has been the source of con-
siderable worry to Judge Huck. In
fact he delivered himself of some
strong and timely suggestions from
the bench on Tuesday, not along that
particular line, but akin to it. What
he said on that occasion should "soak
in" on the many who have at differ
ent times been guilty of the very
thing he referred to, that Of criti-
cism of the manner in which some
individuals are acquitted, while many
others, whom they profess to know
are guilty of crime, are never so much
as molested.
The Judge spoke plainly and evil
IDENTIFY meant exactly what he said
that there was entirely too much
criticism and not enough good citi-
zenship-- citizenship that will make
an affiravit when they know the law
| is being violated; that the courts can
be no stronger in the enforcement of
justice than are a majority of the
people which the courts are intended
to serve. They were splendid and
timely remarks, directed against
those self-constituted judges, who
seem to know everything that is 60
ing on in the entire county, until they
are called on for testimony-when
they usually "know nothing"
The one case that has thus far
come up for hearing is that of Alton
Craft, charged with assault with in
tent to kill. 1t came up Wednesday
morning, before jury, and was given
into their hands at noon yesterday
There are several other cases against
Craft, who is not of age. but who ap-
pears to be too often in company with
trouble,
The Farmington times., 1922-11-24
Woodrow Wilson
Foundation

J. c. Watson, Of this city, who is
chairman Of the Woodrow Wilson
Foundation for st. Francois county,
has just received letter from J.
Lionberger Davis, State Chairman,
reciting some information of interest
in regard TO that enterprise. For the
information of Times readers the fol-
lowing excerpts are made from that
letter:
"Am sure you will be delighted to
hear that more than 100000 men, wo-
men and children, in every State in
the Union, have contributed 100000
to the Woodrow Wilson Foundation.
1t is now proposed to raise, before
Dec. 28th, Mr.. Wilson's Goth birth
day, 100000 by public subscription,
the amount needed to complete the
million dollar fund.
"On the original appeal Missouri
raised about 90 per cent of the amount
asked. Now that only 100000 re-
mains to be raised, we are asked to
give $4,000 more. Surely this should
not be difficult. With the help of
such good friends as yourself, we
ought to be able to do this.
'St. Francois county raised only
STOPS of the 5000 assigned as its
quota. Would suggest you call on all
those who are interested in this mat
ter, and by cooperation l feel that
you will be able to place st. Francois
county on the final roll of honor"
The Farmington times., 1922-11-24
CRADER-UNDERWOOD

Monroe D. Grader, of Esther. and
Miss Grace Underwood, of Flat River,
were quietly married Saturday, No
yember 18th, by Justice Zolman, at
the residence of George Sutherland.
Friends of this happy couple wish
them much happiness.
The Times editor and wife spent
the weekend in st. Louis with Mr..
Bradshaw's sister Mrs. ]. W. Farris,
of Lebanon, Mo.
Mrs. D. H. Evans and daughter
late of Jefferson City, are moving in
to the Clardy property, on West First
street. John Towls Mrs. Evans bro
ther, will live with her.
The Farmington times., 1922-11-24
Constantly In
creasing Interest

This is the fourth week Of the
Missing Word Contest, which is now
running in The Times, and the man
agement of this paper is greatly
pleased with the developments that
are occurring each week in this cam
paign. 1t is a most forceful demon
stration-something out of the ordi-
nary-to prove that subscribers gen
orally are discriminating readers Of
newspaper advertising, even though
there is no possible prize in sight.
This statement is made for che rea-
son that we know many who are in
terested in this contest, for their
own employment and pleasure, who
have not entered the contest for
prizes.
The constantly increasing interest
that has been taken in this contest,
up to the present time, is also most
gratifying to The Times manage
ment. Several new participants have
each week gotten into the contest,
and The Times mail has been increas-
ing in volume each week, until it now
appears that the entire county is in
terested in this contest. Nor is II
confined to this county, not to Mis-
souri,.
The Missing Word last week was
"off", and occurred in the advertise
mcnt of the st. Francois County
Bank, between the words "work" and
"a". A large number located the
word, but many did not. However
those who failed last week may dis
cover the winner this week, and thus
sustain their general average. a
The word this week begins and ends
with the letter "t".
The Farmington times., 1922-11-24
Series of Big, Important Meetings the
Week of December

week, OF DecemDeT
With the assistance Of E. M. Har-
mon, Dairy Extension Specialist from
the University of Missouri, series
of meetings will be held Dec. 5, 6, Z
and 8. At the night meetings, three
reels of motion pictures will be
shown. They will deal with COW test
ing association work, and one reel on
milk. No admission will be charged.
Mr.. Harmon will talk on cow testing
association work at these night meet
ings.
At least two demonstrations will be
held daily in grinding and mixing
feed for dairy cattle, in addition to
suggestions given on balancing ra-
tions. Rations will be figured out,
based on the feed grown on theatarnss
balanced with commercial feeds. Some
of these demonstrations, if not all,
will be on farms where suitable ma
chimes for grinding corn on the ear,
are located.
The entire program of meetings
has not been completed but will ap-
pear in the newspapers next week.
The Farmington times., 1922-11-24
Will Close for
Thanksgiving

The following business firms of
Pennington will close at 10 a. m. on
Thanksgiving for the remainder of
the day:
Fischer Mercantile Company.
Karsch Shoe Company.
Klein Grocer Company.
Economy Cash Shoe Store.
Pennington Mercantile Company.
c. F. Rickus.
Morris Brothers.
Henderson Store Co.
The Farmington times., 1922-11-24
w. E. BARBER
FARMINGTON, MO.

six registered Jersey bulls in the coun-
ty, the securing of tried bull for the
Association members, the organiza-
ton of two registered calf clubs
among the boys and girls, the holding
of a sale next fall on the date of the
Show, and the cooperation in organ
izing a Cow Testing Association.
The Farmington times., 1922-11-24
Farm Bureau Notes
Farm Bureau Meeting at Doe Run

Farm Bureau Meeting at Doe Run
There will be farmers meeting at
Doe Run in the Workman's hall, Sat
urday night. Nov. 25th. The meeting
will be called to order at 7:30. 1t is
hoped that sufficient interest will be
shown at this meeting that local or
ganization can be perfected. A pro-
gram of work for the year will be
worked out. Among other things dis
cussed will be the lining of soils. Ev-
eryone is invited to attend this meet
ing.
The Farmington times., 1922-11-24
Annual Meeting of St. Francois
County Farm Bureau Dec. 9th.

County tarm bureau Dec. Stn'
The annual meeting of the Farm
Bureau will be held December 9th, at
Harrington, in the Carleton College
building. An all-day program is be-
ing arranged. Brief reports of the
work of the Farm Bureau for the
past year will be reviewed. The COM
ing years work will be planned. At
least one speaker from outside a the
county will be secured to give a talk.
A change is being made in the
Farm Bureau plans for the year 1928.
An Agricultural Council consisting OF
representatives from those commun1-
ties in the county where interest has
been taken in the work, will be elected
at the annual meeting. The council
will meet four times year to work
out the plans and policies of the Farm
Bureau. Efforts will be made to hold
the meetings of the council at times
during the year when farm work is
least pushing. The number of repre-
sentatives from different communities
has been worked out. AS the women s
part of the Farm Bureau Is funda-.
mental, the council will consist OF
men and women in equal numbers.
The communities, with the number OF
representatives they will have In the
council are as follows: ,
C. u. 6, Salem 2, French Village
2, Bismarck A, Knob Lick-Brightstone
2, Burch 2, Oak Grove A. Cedar Falls
2, Hazel Run 6, Doe Run d, Liberty
Vile 4, Valle Forge 2, Ste. Genevieve
Z. 2. Barton g, Sink Hole 2, Primrose 2
Cartee 2, Cross Roads 2, King 2
Germania 2.
The nominees from each Of these
communities are to be selected by the
communities, either at a community
meeting or in any way desired. These
nominees names areato be presented
to the entire membership at the an
nual meeting and ratified or rejected
Each community is urged to select al
the earliest opportunity its nominees
and see that representative is Sc
lected to present the names at the
annual meeting.
! The officers president, vice presi
dent, secretary and treasurer, will bt
nominated from the floor. These foul
with the Business Agent and foul
other members, will constitute thu
Executive Committee. The latter
members will be elected by the Agri
cultural Council, either from its owl
members or otherwise.
Jersey Breeders Association Meeting
The work of the st. Francois Coun
ty Jersey Breeders Association fol
the past year was reviewed with sat
isfaction at a meeting held Saturday
The work for the coming year wa!
outlined. Among other things to bt
nrhinund are the nlncine, Of at lcaS
The Farmington times., 1922-11-24
Ham and Bacbn Show, Jan. 1919.

The Ninth Annual Ham and Bacon
Show will be held during Farmers
Week, january 1919. 1928. at the
University of Missouri. The State
Board of Agriculture has allowed
S175 for cash premiums and $50 for a
trophy cup for the best county exhib-
it.
The Farmington times., 1922-11-24
THE DREAM GIFT SHOP

Open one day, Saturday, Dec, End,
p .. M, at Young Mems Club. At
tractive, new and unusual gifts;
cakes, candy and afternoon tea. 47-2t
The Farmington times., 1922-11-24
FOrrister

FOIFlSteT
Emily Forrister died at her home in
Knob Lick Tuesday morning, Nov. 81.
She was 81 years of age and on Nov.
18th she sustained a fractured hip in
a fall, which caused her death four
days later. She is survived by one
son and daughter, Mrs. Susie Nell.
Funeral services were conducted
Wednesday at p. m. by Rev. Bailey.
Interment in Knob Lick cemetery.
The Farmington times., 1922-11-24
DEPARTED

"Uncle" Jim Morris died suddenly
at his home near Hazel Run, Sunday,
Nov. 10th. Although his health had
been failing for some time, his death
came as a great shock to relatives and
many friends.
James d. Morris, son of the late
James B. and Mary Ann Berry Nor
ris, was born in Ste. Genevieve coun-
ty June oath, l843.
On Dec. 10, 1870, he was married
to Mary E. Mosteler, who passed
away Oct. q, 1886. To this union six
children were born, Mrs. E. j. Har
rington, Mrs. X. C. McCreary of
Pennington, r. F. D. 4, and Mrs. A.
]. Smith OF Bonne Terre. Three died
in
December ), 1889, he was married
to Lucy ]. Perkins. To this union
three children were born, William,
Frank and Iva (Mrs. Claude McCar-
ty) of Bonne Terre R. F. d. 1.
He is also survived by one brother,
Henry, and one sister, Mrs. Belle
Ashburn, twenty-one grandchildren
and four great-grandchildren.
Funeral services were conducted at
Marvin Chapel ut li,. ils. Ttseaday by
Rev. Carl Thomasson, assisted by
Rev. Robt. Boyd. Interment in M. G..
cemetery.
The Farmington times., 1922-11-24
FOR SALE

The Barber Meat Market on west side
of square, will be sold at price well worth
the money, including all fixtures at the
slaughter, delivery truck; and touring car,
if desired.
Will sell on invoice or on lump PROPOSE
ton. Paying business. Only reason for
selling is am going fo quit the business.
The quicker the sale the smaller the price.
The Farmington times., 1922-11-24
Scott

Frank Scott, farmer about 62
years of age, died Monday, Nov. 20,
of apoplexy. He is survived by one
son, who lives on the Elliott Klein
farm, north of Pennington.
The Farmington times., 1922-11-24
Gordon

Robert L. Gordon, aged 40 years,
died at his home near pleasant Hill
at 8 a. M. Wednesday, Nov. %, 1922,
after a lingering illness Of tubercN-
losis.
Funeral services were conducted at
the Pleasant Hill church at / p. M.
Thursday by Rev. Golfer. Interment
in Parkview cemetery.