The Ely miner. [volume] (Ely, Minn.) 1895-1986, 1922-05-05
HOW SILLY!
BY eLADIs =. PRAY


g. 1922. by Mcclure Newspaper Syndicate
It was silly sort Of a quarrel, but
for the matter Of that, all quarreling
Is silly; and when two silly young
people are concerned in 1t, it might be
said that the quarrel is supremacy
silly. Besides, 1t was a breakfast ia.
BILE quarrel, and breakfast time is the
very silliest time Of day to quarrel, es-
pecially If 1t be fine spring day, as
this was.
Young Jackie Jones cit might as
well be Jackie Jones as what it really
is) scowled across at Mrs. Jackie
Jones cher name for whole month";
who wept most unbecomingly-in fact,
she sniffled-and expounded this law
Of his little universe:
II will not countenance any such
proceeding, Mrs. Jones. You must re-
spect my wishes in this matter. This
is my house" (s-h-h, it was two rooms
and bath and kitchenettel, land here
my word must stand as the supreme
authority. If you do not think this a
reasonable condition, you, of course.
have the liberty Of finding other con-
ditions more suitable elsewhere. So
long as this is your domicile, you must
obey me-"
Just then Mrs. Jackie Jones caught
sight OF her unbecoming red eyes and
red nose In the side Of her shiny new
percolator, which, it must be con-
fessed, did not decrease the unbecom-
ingness to any degree. This reflection
was so narrowing to her womanly feel
ings that she Immediately forgot all
her bridely resolution to never, never
quarrel.
"All right then, Jackie Jones, will
go elsewhere, as you choose to call
1t, and Pm not going home to mother,
either, to have that catty Martha whis-
pering things about me. I'll go and
live with Lucie Vampum and support
myself by helping her dressmake. Per-
haps when I'm really gone, you'll val
ue my affection"
Jackie regarded her with the same
expression one would expect to find
on the face of prince of the blood
royal, If suddenly informed by his con-
sort that she had an idea of doing
homework for diversion.
"Lucie Vampumw he managed to
squirt out in highly concentrated hor-
ror, "you mean to say that you would
go to live with that divorcee? That
that-that womanW
Eyes, Lucie- Vampum, that woman,
and"
'But, Bunniep' in his dismay at the
dreadful prospect, he reverted to his
usual name for his recalcitrant spouse,
you told me only about week ago
that you did not believe in divorce,
and that you thought Lucie Vampum
to be outside the consideration of any
one worth while"
"Yes, l know; but that was before
my own happiness was ruinetL" oh,
so sadly, ''that was before lost my
husbands love-"
"Now, Bunny, be reasonable"
Nothing is so aggravating as to be
adjured to reason in that particular
tone Of voice, especially to be so adj
jured by a person so very unreason-
able as to quarrel with one.
81 am reasonable, Jackie Jones; I
am not the unreasonable member OF
the family. will not discuss it any
more, and besides, If you don't hurry.
you'll miss your car. When you come
back this evening I'll be gone with ev-
erything that might remind you Of
me-" Then, in a quavering voice.
"G-o-o-d-by." (Sob.)
Poor Jackie lost all that superb dig
nifty, acquired after painful and long
observation Of Mr.. Quimby, his supe-
rior and the head clerk at the Office,
and he actually pleaded with his silly
little wife. 1t was a desperate situa-
ton; he really might miss that car.
Jaw, Bunnie-" then he became in
coherent.
Bunnie began to relent. In fact,
she had to relent. There remained
only one minute of that FIVE minutes
for which she had quarrelled so bit
terly with her Jackie; that five min
utes that caused the quarrel in the
first place Oh, forgot that you
didn't know what caused it! That
part Of it was SO silly I am quite
ashamed to tell you about 1t.
You see, Mrs. Jackie had walked
Jackie up full Eve minutes of seven
to tell her once more that he would
never cease to love her. 1t was not
really necessary for Jackie to wake
until seven, and his love very nearly
did cease then and there. Had he not
told her at least ten thousand times
with variations In the past month?
Now, if the quarrel and its cause
were silly, what must you think of the
reconciliation? My courage fails me.
You will simply imagine it. 1t ended
up by his telling her he loved her and
would never cease to love her six
times more, and in spite of all he
caught his car. The silly little Mrs.
Jackie had set the clock ahead five
minutes the night before.