The Bridgeport times and evening farmer., 1922-02-06
WHAT IS PROPER?"
By Beatrice Fairfax. Who Occupies B Unique Position i'm
 the Writing World as an Author.

By Beatrice Fairfax
 Who Occupies 8 Unique Position in the Writing World as an Author-. ity on Problems of Romance. Each day brings me many questions from boys and girls who are worried over problems of manners, etiquette and propriety. Most youngsters start ing out in life find themselves worried over the rules of the game.'' So as Big Sister, to them all, I'm going to try to suggest a blanket order to cover some of their puzzlements. First of all, let's consider just what "propriety" means. The dictionary de- fines propriety as:
 ''The character or quality of being conformed to a correct or acknow- ledged standard. That which espec- ially accords with recognized usage, custom or principle. Fitness or be- comingness.''
 But youth doesn't always know what is the correct or acknowledged standard. It cannot instinctively judge what is recognized usage. To know these things takes either educa- t1on from elders who do know, or ex- perience with the world and its ways. So we must find some simple way of Judging what Is correct. l. First of all, there's the fact that kindness and consideration of others lie back of most social rules. Con vention Is society's way of protecting her cht1dren from themselves and from each other.
 Then there's the realization that our own instincts tell us we wouldn't want to have anyone seeing us do certain things. Call 1t fear, or good taste. or dignity, but we all know that if folks saw us doing some of the things we would like to do, they'd not approve. Sometimes we have no patience with their attitude and can't justify it-but we know it is there. And in feeling it, we recognize the thing called "social usage" The things which would hurt our parents make us ashamed, cheapen us in the eyes of friends, damage our standing with fo1ks-al these. we must avoid. They may be merely i'm proper. They may go beyond this and be unkind and cruel. But for the most part we know-however much we try to fool ourselves and bend cir cumstances to our wish.
 Good manners are generally the kind and considerate way of doing things.
 In thinking how what we do affects the rights of others, we are likely to
 
 In not being greedy or selfish, or over eager to get everything for our selves we can be fairly sure of show
 ng good manners.
 It doesn't much matter whether a man walks down the street between two girls or on the outside, though the latter seems to be the preferred usage. But there's nothing much to be gained or lost one way or the other And it doesn't pay to burden our minds with details which can only make us awkward and self-conscious.
 What a girl orders when she goes out to dinner with a man isn't a burn the things which will make the check ing question, if she doesn't pick out far beyond his pocketbook.
 Society has certain arbitrary rules which make some young folks chafe. But there's common sense and pro- tection for youth back of these rul- ings. For instance, it won't do for group of young folks to spend weeks vacation unchaperoned at cottage in the country. A little prac- tica1 common sense explains this and the idea back of it.
 Common sense and a recognition of the rights of others and good taste need only careful observation to total into something so digniffed and sane that their possessor needn't worry much about what is proper. for he or she will instinctive1y do what is bigger and finer-the right thing
 Amethyst tie-pins are popular at Deauvtlle because of thoir alleged