davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Birmingham age-herald., 1922-01-28
TURNIPS AND EMPIRE
From the Brooklyn Eagle.

From the Brooklyn Eagle.
 Ex-Empress Zita explained to somewhat bewidered newspaper correspondent who inter viewed her at Bordeaux that the failure of the attempt made by her husband and herself to recapture their former empire was due to a heavy turnip crop in Hungary which filled most of the available railway cars and left no room for the movement of the imperial pair and their sympathzers after the spectacular landing from an airplane on Hungarian soil. That was the cause of our delay" she insisted land the cause of our failure'
 The 'ifs" of history are always interesting if futile study. Napoleon was credited with saying in his exile that Waterloo would have ended differently if Murat had been there to lead the cavalry and Mortier to lead the guard. We are told that if a British government of fca had not been in such rush to get away from London to the country for holiday an important dispatch, destined for America, would not have missed the packet and Sir William Howe would have received his orders to join Burgoyne, preventing the surrender at Saratoga with it's decisive conse oueuce. the entry of France into our Revolutionary Jar. Instances might be multiplied indefinitely to show that II SomeDody hau uone Tn gwen crlSlS some thing which was left undone, the course of world events would have been materially al- tered
 But never before has the lowly turnip given an "if' to history. It is not the most ob- scure of vegetables, but it is of the hum blest Gourmets sheer at it as food for cattle. It seldom gets into print except in reports of the department of agriculture and the Wall about Market quotations. It is true that Sam uel Johnson put it into Verse, thus:
 If man who ~turnips cries,
 Cries not when his father dies,
 iTis sign that he would rather
 Have a turnip than father.
 But this is jingle, not poetry. It does not enhance the reputation of the turnip one bit. In the future, however, the turnip should have different standing. It will be known to posterity as the thing that finally wrecked a dynasty. If there had been fewer turnips in Hungary in 1921 there might have been more Hapsburgs in Europe. Let us henceforth respect
The Birmingham age-herald., 1922-01-28
 A FAMILY AFFAIR

"Tnstead of urging these men to fight, you ought to try to stop them,o said the indignant bystander.
 Don't you worry about this little sct-to," said the. man who was holding the belligerents' hats and coats. Both of them are kin to me and matter which one wins I can't lose."
The Birmingham age-herald., 1922-01-28
LETTERS TO EDITOR

(The editor of The Age-Herald has received during the past week such large number of letters from readers that it has been impossible to publish them all promptly. They will be printed rapidly as facilities permit, and an unusually large number will be published to- morrow.l
The Birmingham age-herald., 1922-01-28
NOT so GOOD

"A smart salesman was in here this morn ing' remarked MT. Dubwaite. "A smooth taker, a pleasing personslity-just the type of fellow who is bound to succeed at anything he under takes"
 "By the way. What was he selling?"
 "Blest if know.-I forgot to ask him."
The Birmingham age-herald., 1922-01-28
ART AND ADVERTISING

When prima donnas fuss and fight We do not tremble at the sight. They may be planning artfully To get some more publicity.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1922-01-28
Birmingham, January 26, 1922.
THE FIELD OF sTUMPs"S

To the Editor of The Age-Herald: 0, Mignon Hall: If you are kind-hearted as you claim to be, how could you have been so "crool' to say what you did in Sundays Age-H Herald about "a field of stumps?' That was ''the most unkndest cut of a.
 LUCY B. SEEGERS. Gadsden, January 23, 1922
The Birmingham age-herald., 1922-01-28
A LARGE VOLUME

Would you like to hold book, sir?' asked the photographer. Some of our clients think it makes them look more intellectual"
 "A good idea said the sef-made man. "Got one of them unabridged dictionaries about the premises?"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1922-01-28
STILL TRAVELLING

From the Arkansas Gazette
 man bursts forth with the idea that 99 per cent of the forgeries could be attributed to blank checks issued by the banks. The other l per cent, we presume, should be divided be- tween pen and ink
The Birmingham age-herald., 1922-01-28
ADRIFT WITH TIL TIMES
soUELcHED

Madam" said the little man in movie the atre, q can't see anything but the back of your head"
 Well, sir" replied the matron, with frosty look, "do you see anything wrong with it?'
The Birmingham age-herald., 1922-01-28
SUSCEPTIBLE TO FLATTERY

What did Mir. Grabcoin say when you en- tered his office?''
 "He said the country, ,was-going to the demni- tion bow-wows,' replied the enterprising sales man.
 "And yet you sold him big bill of goods?"
 "Yes. I said what this country needed was some successful business men who would be willing to make great personal sacrifice and hold office where their brains would serve the public. Then I gave him significant look and waited. Pretty soon he cleared his throat and asked to see my samples
The Birmingham age-herald., 1922-01-28

The Merchant Tailors-D Designers association has banned bell-bottomed trousers, pinch back coats, fancy vests and coats with hgh-cut waist lines They determined to take the snap out of "snappy" suits.
 x
 The visit of the Prince of Wales to India is said to have been ghastly failure. When the idea of sef-determination sinks into a national conscience blandishments won't work
 < <
 Boddy, the notorious negro murderer of New York, is particular about his dress The indi- cations are that he will soon cease to take any interest in clothes.
 MT. Harding is taking hand in the Shan tung controversy, but will probably consult with Secretary Hughes before venturing on any more interpretations.
 Another precedent has been shattered beyond recovery. New York man has married his mother-in-law and she says it was the logical thing to do.
 Women who attend the wedding of Princess Mary will be expected to conform to certain dress regulations but even that won't keep them away.
 
 None of us indispensable. Even without Geraldine Farrar, the Metropolitan Grand Opera company will continue to function.
 x x X
 Now that Emporia, kas, has famous shoe maker, it has earned about all the distinction town of it's size is entitled to- Balfour keeps fit by playing tennis at the ripe age of "A. He plays his stiffest game, however at a conference table.
 Most of the milonaires attending the farm conference in Washington didn't make their money on farm.
 The army is offering tailored uniforms for buck privates and jaunty new service caps as bait to recruits.
 No feature of the contemporary press pleases us more than the absence of Debs from the headlines
 The bloc system of legislation has it's disad- vantages. For further details consult President Harding.
 The venerable Polish champion wants $20,000 to wrestle in New York. Does he think he's a pugilist?
 The reckless automobilist is asset to Birmingham, compared to the fax murderer" Colonel Harvey seems to have settled down to be safe and reasonably sane ambassador.
 < x *
 Mr. Ford has called bluff and the next move is up to Congress.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1922-01-28
EPITAPH

The train blew for the crossing, His car some gas he gave, The wind will soon be tossing The grass upon his grave.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1922-01-28
REALISM

Quite realistic snowstorm in this play "It seemed to impress a slightly inebriated gentleman in box"
 "Yes?"
 "He got up and solicitously draped wrap around his wifes bare shoulders.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1922-01-28
ABSORBED

reading.p
 "Why do you think so?"
 She's been at it steadily for half an houl without lifting bon-bon.'
The Birmingham age-herald., 1922-01-28
FEED HIM

Now I've never known sinner Who was not improved by dinner
 Some acute Matron made the observation, So we'll known throughout the nation
 Feed the brute PAUL COOK.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1922-01-28

the turnp. It has made the world little safer for democracy.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1922-01-28
BILL WHITE PLAYS SAFE
From the New York World.

From the New York World.
 Some one out in Emporia, Kan, saw Paw Iowa and her ballet the other day and was so shocked that he wrote a letter to his paper protesting against it as a "leg show This seemed to raise nice question of art that The World wired William Allen White, the most effulgent of Emporias stars:
 "The World would be glad to know how far Emporias views of art and esthetics are jared by Pavlowas shns. What would Emporia think of The Demi- Virgin which is packing them in and in which shns are the least part of the dis play?"
 Last night MT. White replied:
 Replying to yours of even date,
 Permit me here below to state
 l never saw The Dem Virg
 never hope to see one.
 Yet when I feel the cosmc urge
 I'd rather see than be one.'
The Birmingham age-herald., 1922-01-28
HARD FOR WATSON TO PROVE CHARGES

The Senate Investigating committee which has been hearing charges brought by Senator Watson of Georgia that soldiers were hanged and mistreated in France is expected to end it's work next week.
 The net result of it's labors will probably show that the fiery Georgian has run into ar- other mares nest. While some witnesses have sworn categorically to fragrant abuses of au- thority, they have been flatly contradicted by others. It is noticeable that the intelligence and>standing, both in the army and civil life, of the witnesses who testified that the charges were untrue are such as to justify belief in their testimony.
 Senator Watson threatened to make sensa- tional exposures, and did so, but he has found it difficult to prove them by competent wit nesses. great deal more or less valuable time has been wasted in an investigation which seems be meeting with the fate of most congress sional probes. It isn't getting anywhere in par ticular. MT. Watson who revels in excitement and loves publicity, may be enjoying himself but otherwise the investigation is failure.
 There were abuses of authority in the army during the World war, with thousands of mex perienced officers in charge of equally mex. perienced men, not to mention the exigencies of war itself, but the American people demand more than the Watson fasco to convince them that the average American officer was not a gentleman and soldier.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1922-01-28

If a man who ~turnips cries,
 Cries not when his father dies, 'Tis sign that he would rather Have turnip than a father.
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1922-08-09
DEATHS

HILL. Aug. !. EDWARD L.. HILL.
Of California, husband Of Sadie J, Hlll
tives and friends are invited 10 aushi
neral services. saturday, : T.. VI. pre-; re,
eth st. lnterment private.
BEAN,--On Aug, ., Ia22, SARAa
widow Of George II Il R'an. SerSY
Friday afternoon, at . O'Clock, at hef
residence. 66TS Lincoln drive, Germans
lnterment private.
THACHER.-Aug =, NINA R.. w
Chelten ave-, Germantown' widow OF .. Az
friends invited to funeral services, ~
. p ~, at Church Of the brethren
man,own ave. above Sharpnark st.
McMENAMY ON Aug, :, JCsEpay
McMeuamy, husband Of Sdrhh i Me's
Inee SmuD Funeral ON FrtaE. az
NJ, from his late rrsidcl'r', nn,% ,,r, rsau
ave. Iiolmesburg. So.rmn ,e4H'.,, .n,s., Lnsa
Dominic's church, 10 \. NJ Ih''"'
Dominic's Cemetery,
Cliff -.Suddenly, Aug :. MNhhitp
widow Of George y. Cl!tt III h'r oo'n
Relatives and friends are inIl'I
funeral services, Frida\, / 'FFrranihl
late residence, 1906 hdllIa'H ST. i'HT
lntcrment private !:
MITCHELL. Aug 5, l"2S tAhnwi't3 AZ NM
hand OF the late Elizabeth Iornert M..7
aged Is years Relatives ana itt,s,s.,
invited TO attend funeral. without iuI.", ii,s
tice. saturday, p. NJ fro'" ms n,.'r,nsSt 1% n
totn Cemetery, uDayIisht'sa'ns u%
FoRMAN. Aug. $. at ocean GI'Tf ~ N
SMITH H.. husband Of Emma " IA
Relatives and friends, also Hrrn'',
No. 3s5. T.. and A. NJ TrmrII M "a
ter. No. .4s; Mary rpmmauIrry,,
KS' r. Iu Iu Temple Kadosh CMaptssh. v
8 h'rtisan' ) y. ". Assembly,, No, .. mi. Ssj
! hers ushers' Association liaplis' ieM'v bn
ali other organizations Of. Wh'rh Nv
member. invited to funeral 5"f, 5,T Ia and
: p NJ, Baptist Temple. Broad a"'
yts Internleut private,
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1922-08-09
BOY TRIES RESCUE,
NEARLY LOSES LIFE
Lad, 7, Found Gasping tor
Breath in Fire on Ridge
Avenue
BROTHER DISCOVERS HIM

Seven -year-old Lester Bnrish almost
lost his life in an attempt to rescue
his grandmother from his burning nome
nj 1899 Ridge avenue early this morn
ing. The boy was himself rescued pN
his older brother, Abraham. as no lay
suffocating on a second floor LANDING.
The fire started in the clothing store
Of Israel Bnrish. father OF the pos.
The flames spread with such rnpiul.'
that the nine members Of Barish taul.
lily were momentariy trapped on Tue
two upper floors. H..
When Barish was awakened by me
cracking Of flames he aroused MS WIZ
Rose, and four Of his children, IN.
Guiding Lester. who were sieeplnS on
the second floor. They all hurried 10
the street. A.,
In the meantime his oldest son, Abra
ham. had smelled smoke while OH my
third floor with two sisters anu
his grandmother, sixty-three years olu'
The two girls crawled through WIN. VIM.
dow and onto a shed, from which the!
made their way to an adjoining dwell.
ing. Abraham took the aged woman
by the hand and led her to safety
down the steps.
Lester did not notice his grandmother
emerge into the street and decided that
she still was asleep on the third floor
He ran back into the house and 1t was
not until several minutes later that
his absence was noticed.
Then Abraham dartcd through the
burning hallway and up the steps after
his young brother. He found the poH
gasping for breath and carried him to
the pavement. where he was revived
The damage is estimated at $4,000.
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1922-08-09
MAN W|THBATH|NG
BEAUTY GLIDE HELD.
Ardmore Police Nab Allentown
Woman Parading in
Male Garb
SOUGHT AS EMBEZZLER

Masculine clothing from head TO foot
could not hide th" "hathing beauty
glide" VI "man" Stroling through
.Ardmorc shortly bcfor" noon today.
"Don't be silly: I'm man" the sus-
pcrt said in an unmIStakably feminine
voice when arcostrd by Putrolman
Harry Ewing.
At ;hc Ardmor" police station, the
prisoner confessed she was Bertha
Ziglcr. SO North Sixth street, Allen
town. and that she thought a man :
clothing would get her a job quicker
than would feminine tinery.
This explanation fell fiat when Chief
Donaghy was informed by police Of
Allentown that the woman was wanted
for cmbezzlement there She Is said 70
have worked as bookkcpp"r in all
Allentown factory.
Ewing saw tn" maSQu"rader walking
on Lancaster pike. tn" clothes w"r"
the clothes Of Adam-that Is n modern
Adam-but the walk was the walk OF
Eve.
\ straw hat was worn rakishly on
the masqucrader' close cropped brown
curls. \ checked suit with a beItCd
back, n blue striped silk shirt. black
low shoes and black silk socks com =
pleted tho ensemble.
The woman. who coyly admitted she
was thirty five years old, tried 10 affect
husky voice. but the attempt failed,
She was taken before MagiStrnt" Still
wagon. who held her for tn" Allentown
authorities.
The police at Allentown said a war
rant charging Miss Iiglcr with 'mh"h'
Element had been issued by an alder
man there \ constable was I" star
I IL s., r,p \ Nrirnrn Ibt nal Itt
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1922-08-09
DEATH OF MRS. BORIE
Member Of Old Philadelphia Family
Dies in Maine

Mrs. NJ. Clcmpntinc Borie. widow Of
Henry =. Borie, and a member of one
of the oldest families in Philadelphia,
died on Monday at her summer home at
Cirinds,onc. Ne. Her body will be
brought to this city and funeral services
held at her Wayne residence Friday
afternoon.
Mrs. Borc. who before her marriage
was Miss NJ Clcmcntinc White, spent
most of her time while in Philadelphia
at her home. 143 South Twelfth street.
The house is one Of the few fine old
residences not crowded out by the ad-
vance of business.
Mrs. Boric's brother, William Rob-
ert White, was president of the Robe :
sonia Iron Company, and prominent
clubman. lie died in October. 1914,
leaving an estate of $40, 900 to Mrs.
Alice Hoyt Henry, daughter of the Rev.
Thomas A. lIoyt. for many years pas
tor of the Chambers Wylic Memorial
Presbyterian Church. Mrs. Henry was
sister n-law Of Mr.. White.
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1922-08-09
TluO Boys DrOlUn as
Girl Fails at Rescue
Continued from Page One
FIGURES IN DL.nlNCO TRAGEDY


of Delanco. brought up the body Of
Harry Williamson. His father had
been waiting at the wharf He took
the body in an automobile to his home,
where his wife lay i'll.
Ten minutes after Harry's body was
brought to the surface. the same grap-
nling iron came UP with its second bur-
den. The bodies had rested on the bot
tom nf tho river almost side by side.
Miss Miller. who is spending her sum-
mcr vacation with her parents in De-
lance, is school teacher at Prospect
Plains. y. !. Other than to say that
she had undergone thrilling expert
cnCe Carol would not comment on her
heroic action.
"Happy," who has become tho hero
of Delanco. was found this morning
sitting on a bridge over the Ranrocas
Creek. dangling his feet in the water,
with Il fishing line in his hand.
"I'm fshin' for tadpolcs. he said
in answer to question concerning his
rescue work, land Id rather not be
pestercd right now
"As for me- pulling the boy out of the
water. that's nuthin' strange. IOu'd
do the same thing. I'm only sorry we
couldn't save the other
Happy is II typical country boy,
with touslcd hair and face full of
frecklcs. IIc is modest in the extreme.
Residents Of DclHncO are already think
ing of asking II Carnegie medal for him.
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1922-08-09
FREED BY RENSHAW,
REARREST ORDERED.
Judge Monaghan Issues War
rant for Drug Suspect, Over
ruling Magistrate
WAS ACCUSED BY ADDICT

A bench warrant was issued today
by Judge Monaghan for William Fitz-
gerald, who was accused last month Of
selling mar rdr drug. but who was
discharged by .,lngistrate Rcnshnw.
The Judge ordered Fitzgcrald's ar
rest after questioning William Fries,
on trial for the unlawful possession Of
drugs. who stated Fitzgerald sold him
the narcotic.
Judge Monaghan also suggested TINT
detectives investigate n restaurant on
Ninth street near Ridge avenue, where
Fitzgerald is employed and where Fries
snid he obtained drugs more than fifty
itimoS since Inst May.
Detective Fouchc. Negro member
,,of the vice squad. testified that on July
- he saw Fitzgerald place small
package in nj" box in front Of the
restaurant. Fries came along n min
ute later and removed the package. ac-
cording To Fouche.
IN" detectives said he arrested both
men and that Magistrate RensLqw hold
rrleS tor the Grand Jury and dis.
charged Fitzgerald for lacl, of evidence.
i don't understand that" remarked
Judge Monaghan. "If you saw the man
place this package in the pie box he
c'rtalhly mad possession of the drug and
aPnarontiy is a seller
turning To Assistant District AttOr-
heF Hordon. the Judge continued
Here Is restaurant where thov
nave man behind the counter who. IL
seems furnishes drugs to these unfor.
tunate addicts. think this place
should be investigated by your dc,ec.
questioned by the Court. Fries said
ne had been going straight" and
workins in Reading for several months
aand that he returned 10 Philadelphia
May .; He is engaged to be married to
Reading girl. he said
The defendant said he had been huv.
Ing drugs ut the restaurant since Nav.
He sold he bought it from any one who
would sell II.
From whom did you buy II on this
OCCASION asked Judge Monaghan.
From the man Magistrate Renshaw
discharged" Fries answered. He added
that he was broke" on that orcas!on,
and that Fitzgerald trusted him FOR
half fifty cent package.
The frequency OF Fries purchases
made Judge Monaghan suspect hc was
a peddler and not a user. but Fries in
sisted he never sold drugs.
Fries pleaded guilty to having drugs
in his possession. Disposition Of his
case was postponed while County De-
tective McGettican and Detective
Fouche went out after Fitzgerald.
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1922-08-09
HARDING RECEIVES
TWO WOMEN TODAY
Mrs. Warburton and Mrs. j. j..
O'Brien to Be Guests at
White House
LIKELY TO TALK POLITICS

Mrs. Barclay II. Warburton, vice
chairman of the Republican state Com
mittee, and Mrs. John j. O'Brien,
director of publicity of that organiza-
ton, will be received today In the
White House by President Harding.
The object of their visit was not
disclosed, but II is thought to bear on
the political situation in this state with
reference to women.
After their conference with the Prcei-
dent, the two women will meet Mrs.
Harriet Taylor Upton. of the National
Republican Executive Committee, with
whom they will discuss methods OF pub
licity and the dissemination OF educa-
tional matter being adopted by the Re-
publican women in all States. Confer.
ences with other political leaders in
the national capital have also been ar
ranged.
Before departing for Washington yes
terdsy. Mrs. Wdrburton expressed the
pleasure with which she noted the en-
thusiasm being displayed by the women
Of this State in the coming gubernatorlal
campaign. She called attention TO the
numerous requests for literature and
information pouring into the state
headquarters. SOC South Broad street,
daily.
The two leaders attended dinner
given yesterday BY Senator and Mrs.
George Wharton Pepper. Among the
other guests were Eliot Wadsworth, of
New York. Assistant Secretary OF the
Treasury. and his wife. =,
W. Harry Baker. chairman ct the
Renuhlicon state Committee, announced
Yesterday the appointment of Mrs;
O'Brien ms chairman Of the Speakers
Committee Of the State organization.
Mrs. Warburton and Mrs. O'Brien
will return to Philadelphia tonight
and will entertain Clifford Pinchot. Re-
publican nominee for Governor. at din
ner at the Warburton home. Mr.. Pin
chot will confer with W. Harry Baker,
chairman of the Republican State Com
mittee, tomorrow at State headquar-
tcrs on plans for the campaign.
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1922-08-09
0. K. HUERTA'S DEAL
Mexico and international Bankers
Reach Agreement

The financial agreement between the
Mexican Government and the intcrna-
tional Bankers Committee has been
ratified BY President Obregon Of Mexico.
the Mexican Consulate in this city vas
advised today.
! A. +. dc Los Monteros. the consul
issued this statement:
This consulate has been officially
advised that the financial agreement re-
Gently concluded in Now York between
Secretary Of the Treasury De La
Huerta on behalf of the Mexican Gov
ernment and the international Com
mittec of Bankers. headed by Thomas
w. Lamont, was ratified yesterday by
President Oregon.
The approval of this agreement by
the Mexican Congress which will take
place shortly will formally settle all
matters connected with Mrxico's public
exterior and railways debt"