The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-04-24

WOMAN Injured in Cow Stampede, Re
covers Slowly. Moline Dispatch.
bargain counter rush, perhaps.
Mebbe This Would Interest the Rotarfans.
T"Everybody's Say-So', Chicago Post1
The misinterpretation and falsi-
1cation of history produces such mud
ding in the heads of the future pollu-
clans that they can never becomes states
men, so indispensable for this wonderful
country, which is at the turning point
of its noble history and which is on the
eve of disaster
If some club or society would like to
know the true history of the last $50
years. | am ready to deliver a series OF
lectures on its gratuitously and thus to
transform the ablest politicians into real
statesmen
am, dear editor, respectfully and
CHEREP-
(Majer General, Count Cherep-Spirido-
vich.)
SAM GOMPERS declares he doesn't know
anything about heaven. That statement will
come as a shock to a number of Sans faithful
followers who have believed utterly in his
cmEiscence.
SCAM, CAN YOU LOAN US THE HAIR
GREASE AND THE CLOTHES? WE'VE
GOT THE PIMPLES.
Dear Mac Please pass this letter on to
Scamozzi and you two let me know what you
think OF M idea
Dear Scam: Going to the Richmore is one
OF the fondest things l am of--so yeu see
would not have to wait until Saturday to give
Mac a description. Really, old dear, l could
not do the thing justice!
What do you say to the three of US meeting
there some Saturday noon? Mac throws a
wicked pen--he might succeed
I'll wear my very shortest one-pieee dress,
nc corset, grey stockings, rolled; a periwinkle
blue hat. and pay my own fourteen cent lunch
con check.
You and Mac wear your tightest suits pinch
back (green preferred), low collars and the
smallest of all possible neckties. Begin now
to grease your hair in order to get the proper
nickel-plated effect. If you can manage a
pimple or two, so much the better. Dolled up
like this we won't be noticed in the crowd
You can sit with six or seven other cake
eaters" and after you get a good start on your
lunch, consisting of a sauce-dish of spiggetti,
come over and ask me for a dance. An intro
6uction would mean nothing in our young
lives.
While dancing we will be careful to steer
clear of that red-headed like" that plays the
violin, for he has been known to prod dancer
who he things has wiggled quite long enough
in spot!
Thanks so much for the idea. Now be a
sport and say VIXEN.
Chicago 4-2122. PEGGY
OH! for the good old days when a news
paper man could drop in on the railway divi-
sion superintendent and say Gimme round
trip pass to Chicago"-and get it. Still
there's T. L. W. H. t. D. o. S. ... Would she
permit US to go to the Wicked City with none
save the probably Ubiquitous Scamozzi as a
Shaperone? ?????
Death. Of Course, Being Fatal.
IRON the A P. report1
Janesville. Wis.--Orin Bronson. as
cripple. was fatally burned alive when
trapped IN his little shop here -.
IN acknowledging recent of sevaraI r,or.
Feiterate, gently but firmly that the contest re
oefunct In other words, its death was fatal
IN APRIL.
My sorrow seems a memry dim
When May laughs. just ahead
Perhaps l shall forget its pain
And as OF yore be glad again
Perchance the scent OF swelling buds
Or note of thrush and lark
Will wake within my soul song
To cheer me, as fare along.
AND yet / wish the mourning dove
Whose sigh drones on the air
Would hush her grooming sad and low
Twould help me lose the long ago
All, why must April, as she leaves
On lightly tripping feet.
Remind me of lost youth . and Won
And tear at that old wound anew
JAY G. SIGMUND.