davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington times., 1922-07-21
SAP and SALT
BY Bert Moses

t--Dy peft mOseb--------
Copyright, 1saa. by Premier syndioat. Incl
The Golden Rule stands no chance with a
big army.
The honesty Of a butcher is sorely tested
when he makes sausages.
----T----
II we practiced health, the practice of
medicine would be unnecessary.
Very often 1t is difficult to determine
whether q man is genius or q fool
The reason so many stupid laws are passed
is because we elect stupid men to make them
Any man could be wise as Solomon n
he had many wives to give him pointers
----
Hez Heck says: "A bunch Of men tell had
stories, while a bunch of women are fist
silly"
husband who lives off his wife's folks
is not likely to Apply for divorce.
About two-thirds Of all our conversation In
wasted before we get down to what we really
want 70 say.
The Washington times., 1922-07-21

0MY greatest thrill. dear doc.
N1 tor, was not a giant loco
motive rushing ninety miles an
hour through the starry night,
but a little letter received from
you some months ago. So !
agreed with you that life. the
mere living. Is endlessly exciting
II you are really alive to Its
mea nings and its possibilities"
A thousand-do bill, to talk
in modern terms, could not have
brought to the present writer the
delicious thrill, the deep-down
heart tickle. caused by the sia-
cere tribute of the engineer.
Oh, yes, partly this Is mere
vanity. But mainly II is that
subtlest of human Joys born
of the satisfaction Of having
touched another soul-with good.
Invest yourself in that fash
ion, seizing every chance. You
will be delighted with your divi.
dends.
Copyright, 1ssa, BY King Features
Syndicate, Incl
The Washington times., 1922-07-21
DO YOU KNOW

1t was a common belief among
the ancients that the motion OF
the stars and planets produced
a kind Of music which has been
referred to in literature as the
music of the spheres, or the
harmony of the spheres.
The Bowery's original name,
the Bouwerie, was derived from
the estate Of the governor, Peter
Stuyvesant, whose farm and
orchards were called the Great
Bouwerie.
The Jerusalem News, an Eng.
lish newspaper, IL printed In
Jerusalem daily. and is sold for
one piastre-which In about four
cents in American money.
The Washington times., 1922-07-21

THEN followed a protracted
l. silence, broken this morning
by the arrival of another letter
from Philadelphia in response to
a recent article in this series:
Thought the writer: How far
that little candle throws his
beamsr'
And again the letter was so
fine in style and so beautiful in
spirit that 1t carries a story and
an influence which should lie
shared at least in part with
readers of these articles.
He says: You ask, How do
you get your thrills when you
want oneT I'll tell you how !
used to SIT mine. I am a driver
Of locomotives, which in itself Is
quite exciting at times. But
riding seventy miles an hour be-
comes quite dull in time. so that
II no longer gives the thrill.
The Washington times., 1922-07-21
Wells VIII Stand

TT is good news that H. G.. Wells
has decided to accept an invi-
i tation to stand for Parliament
as Labor candidate for London
University. Having written much
and having provided the English
speaking world with "An Outline
Of History" Mr.. Wells can now
say: ~ care not who writes human
history, so long as I can make it."
The Washington times., 1922-07-21

THE books Of the youth Of
l. the world, that is. books Of
early literature, are excellent
models for boys books. '.Ho-
mer." "Sir Thomas Mallory"
"The Niebelungen Lied" and
the like are Boys Own Books,
not the language, Of course. but
the substance.
The boy Is not vicious. He
prefers to read Of good people.
But it is only the fundamental.
simple. and primitive virtues
that fire him. For instance, he
likes courage and hates a COW.
ard. He understands and ap-
preciates loyalty and strength
Of character. He likes honesty
and integrity. He despises q
sneak. He adores strength. and
after all strength. strength Of
heart and mind and soul. is the
tap root Of every virtue.
EoR this reason the boy likes
l. danger. He likes for his
hero to get into trouble. But
he wants him to come out Of il
to the discontinue Of his enc.
miles. He likes a happy ending.
as do all unspoiled appetites.
There is a good field for
writers of boys books, but they
will do well. with all their nov.
city of treatment, TO stick 70
the old models that entertained
the youth Of the world. such
are the primitive classics men.
toned above, besides stories IKE
those In Grimm's FAIRY Tales
and all other folklore stories,
awthorn els "Tanglewood
Tales" Robinson Crusoe."
"The Arabian Nights" and the
like.
This In dependable informa.
ton about boys books. respect.
fully offered by one who never
wrote one.
The Washington times., 1922-07-21
A VERY GOOD REASON

A VERY GOOD REASON.
The special reason why New Yorkers
made such a good showing in the war Is
now apparent. Recent statistics show
that 60 per cent Of the New York, men
are married.
The truth In advertising: Laundry ad
says: I'VE Give Your Shirts and Collars
q Finish"
The Washington times., 1922-07-21

WHAT more do you want,
w what better pay could you
have for thought. word or effort,
than the satisfaction OF touching
another life and making 1t q bit
better for that contact?
Some months ago the writer
presented an article on The Joy
of Work." which was in part a
protest against a certain pro-
fessor's statement that anyone
who pretended to find JOY in
work is an ass.
That reached the eye and the
heart Of a locomotive engineer
on the Pennsylvania railroad.
He sent in such a classic rhap-
sody on the subject as to make
his letter the shining jewel for
the setting of subsequent arti-
Gle on the relative wisdom of the
professor and the engineer.
The Washington times., 1922-07-21
What More DO You Want?
BY DR.. Charles Fleischer-

ct used to speed at night quite
l. frequently at speeds you
never would believe an engine
could travel. When rounding
curves and the engine straight.
ened out and I was still alive, I
used to think I had beaten Fate.
And that was how I used TO
get my thrills.
That was before I started 70
read your articles in The
Times. and somehow I soon
became aware that the thrills
was 50 fond of were not
the real thrills of life. Only then
did I discover that the real thrills
come from a brain that is able
to assimilate the beauty of ma
ture, the wonder Of the heavens
and the magnitude Of the sea.
The Washington times., 1922-07-21

NY DEAR While. .
FOR ARGUMENTS
sake.
LET US admit.
THAT YOU'RE the
victim.
OF THE coach's
grudge.
AND THEN consider.
THAT IN spite OF that.
you MADE the team.
AND MANY points
AND THEN sit down.
AND FIGURE it out.
AND WHAT do We
hnd7
WHY, WE find Jus.
this.
THAT YOU should be,
The pRoupEsr boy.
IN ALL the team.
AND vova reward.
.
IN ACCOMPLISH
MENT.
is GREATER far.
THAN IT would have
been.
The Washington times., 1922-07-21
Stars and Stripes
DO YOU AGREE WITH Uss

DO YOU AGREE WITH US,
Although New York's police and fire
departments are both known as The
Finest, the police, after all, are really
the arrestocracy.
One way to get fiat feet is to start out
looking for a fiat you can rent for what
Il IL worth.
The Washington times., 1922-07-21

; WITHOUT THE
grudge.
AND ANYWAY,
Willie.
VERY much doubt.
THIS TALE Of yours.
ABOUT THE srudss.
AND IF l were you
10 FORGET about It.
FOR ONCE on a time.
a DOCTOR told me.
THAT THE common.
est form.
OF INSANITY.
WAS A silly belief.
THAT SOME folks
get.
THEY'RE BEING
picked on.
AND We all of u.
have II.
IN cvs; younger day.
JUST A little bit.
AND We hav. to
forget It.
OR GO clean nutty
AND THERE you are
The Washington times., 1922-07-21

A husband who lives off his wife's folks
is not likely to Apply for a divorce.
The Washington times., 1922-07-21

About two.thirds Of all our conversation IN
wasted before we get down to what we really
want 20 say.
The Washington times., 1922-07-21

II we practiced health, the practice of
medicine would be unnecessary.
The Washington times., 1922-07-21

The honesty Of a butcher is sorely tested
when he makes sausages
The Washington times., 1922-07-21

The reason so many stupid laws are passe,
is because we elect stupid men to make them
The Barre daily times. (Barre, Vt.) 1897-1959, 1922-12-11
BARRE STORES READY.

Reports from the stores OF Barre
not from the storekeepers--is to the
effect that an unusually large and fine
stock OF goods has been laid in for
the Christmas season now at hand.
Barre merchants have long held the
reputation OF being up TO date in their
wares, providing a good assortment al.
belt, Of course, not as large an assort-
ment as can be found in the stores OF
the large cities; and this reputation
has been drawing purchasers from an
ever increasing circle. Discriminating
buyers are coming to Barre from long
distances in order TO take advantage
Of the large and varied stocks Of goods
in many lines. Therefore, this ever
widening circle of patrons win no
The Barre daily times. (Barre, Vt.) 1897-1959, 1922-12-11

only four states in the registration
area of the United States have bet
ter adjusted rate OF deaths from tn.
bereulosis. Those four states are Ne
braska, Utah, Kansas and Montana in
the order of their freedom from NOR.
tality by reason Of this disease. YER
mont's rate is $50 for 100000 Of pop
uIation, Montana's is $3.50, Kansas Is
42.3, Utah's il 4l.3 and Nebraska's Is
36.7. Moreover. Vermont's rate shows
a marked decline from the rate OF
1917 and steady reduction during the
last three years, the total deaths from
tuberculosis in 1919 being 32l, against
2sS in 1920 and 245 in 1921.
These figures serve TO arcentuate the
success Of the anti-tuberculosis fight
in Vermont which was alluded to in
these columns recently Realizing the
significance Of the progress being made,
shall we refuse to do our little part
in carrying on this great work? We
can do that part by purchasing Christ
mas seals in packages, il not in bales.
Make Vermont go over the top during
the weeks preceding Christmssl
The Barre daily times. (Barre, Vt.) 1897-1959, 1922-12-11

Very general sympathy goes out to
the bereaved couple in Putney who
lost their three young children in a
FIRE, which destroyed their little home
while both parents were away from
the building. Growing out Of the very
sad affair there comes strong warn
ing against REIMBURSEMENT of surveil-
lance of children five years and under.
Children of that age are too young and
too adventurous to be left alone.
The Barre daily times. (Barre, Vt.) 1897-1959, 1922-12-11

A st. Johnsbury bank adsertises a
check book as never off duty" Some
times, that's too true and leads to unfor-
tunate resultswhen there's nothing
back Of the check book. There il such
thing as being too constantly on
duty in some cases.
The Barre daily times. (Barre, Vt.) 1897-1959, 1922-12-11

1t is a distinct compliment to Mid
dlebury college that that institution
is retained on the shortened football
schedule Of Harvard university for
1923. albeit the early date Of the pro.
posed encounter indicates that Har.
ward does not desire and does not ex-
pect especially strenuous opposition at
the outset Of the season. A good many
colleges would Ike TO get on the Har-
ward schedule in any part Of the sched-
@ie
The Barre daily times. (Barre, Vt.) 1897-1959, 1922-12-11

doubt find on coming to Barre that
the reports Of customers already buy
ing for Christmas in Barre stores have
been by no means exaggerated and
that Barre offers as good trading facil-
tiles as are to be found north of
Manchester, n. II.
The Barre daily times. (Barre, Vt.) 1897-1959, 1922-12-11

shamokin, Pa, is reported to be
suffering from a shortage of water. II
it does any good for consolation we
might tell Shamokin, in the heart of
the coal region, that nearly every 9TH
er section of the country is threatened
with shortage of coal.
The Barre daily times. (Barre, Vt.) 1897-1959, 1922-12-11

The college football heroes will now
retire from the limelight to pursue
the newspaper lsudations of them
selves, covering the last few months.
We sometimes wonder il the football
men conduct clipping bureau as some
of our public officials do
The Barre daily times. (Barre, Vt.) 1897-1959, 1922-12-11

Harry f. Parker, publisher Of the
Bradford Opinion, had been paying in
surance on his printing plant for Al
years without fire loss until the burn
ing of his plant Nov. is. He was
what would be considered by the in
surance companies a good risk. 1t is
safe to assume that he win continue
his policies.
The Barre daily times. (Barre, Vt.) 1897-1959, 1922-12-11

Two indictments for murder and
four for manslaughter, returned by a
single grand jury in Norfolk county,
Massachusetts, form situation which
does not indicate any diminution of
the "crine wave,' although three of
the manslaughter indictments grew
out of motor vehicle cases.
The Barre daily times. (Barre, Vt.) 1897-1959, 1922-12-11

Jusi now when drive j. being
made IN Vermont for The sale q
Christmas seals 70 aid The Vermont
Tabsrculo.is association in Sighting tn
l'ereuiosis. il i pertinent te ssx that
The Barre daily times. (Barre, Vt.) 1897-1959, 1922-12-11

The farmers dollar is reported to
be going further. Yet il Is coming
back sooner, oddly enough.
The Barre daily times. (Barre, Vt.) 1897-1959, 1922-12-11
TALK OF THE TOWN

Choice selection of Christmas cards
at browns Drug store.
The largest assortment of Ivory
pyralin is at the Red Cross Pharmacy.
adv.
The Barre daily times. (Barre, Vt.) 1897-1959, 1922-12-11
"A Happy Solution

Many of the vexaous family financial troubles could be elm
mated through the exercise of a little forethoughL
For example, family has certain expend
lures make during the year those for Clothes food
taxes insurance, charity, entertainment, etc
II estimate made the probable total Of these items
and at least each month"; proportion from in
sufficient one-twfth of the bills would become
less burdensome could made and the
siy of keeping within the family would be reflected
increased family savings.
This simple program would avoid many Of the complications
and details Of socaed savings carried
without inconvenience to the depositor.
Already hundreds Of depositors regularly with
part OF their earnings saved in of this plan
You style it, if you please the Common Savings
System There novelty about the scheme it the
application Of sound to the problem Of home
interest allowed your money the first Of
each month
Try it the coming year!
Peoples National Bank of Barre
4per cent- in Barre cat
Amarillo daily news. [volume] (Amarillo, Tex.) 19??-current, 1922-11-03
-,OBEPT W CHAMBERS
cloCQ dI oaGE u poaAH ccApAsrT

game constable. or a friend OF Mike
Cilnch.
Il told him wasn't any OF these,
and that ] worked In "a private
hatchery; and he called me - liar"
Young Fry's face flushed and his
voice began TO culver;
That's the way he misuscd me.
and he backed me into the shanty
and had 10 sit down with both
hands up Then he filed my pack
basket with grub. and took my Hx.
and strapped my Kit onto his back.
. And talking all the time IN
his mean, sncery, foreign way-and
/ guess he thought he was funny.
for he laughed NJ his own Jokes.
lie told me his name was Quin.
tana, and that he ought to shoot ma
Tor rat. but wouldn't because OF
the stink Then he said he was
going TO do a quick job that the
police were too cowardly TO do
that he was a.golng 10 ind Mike
Clnch down TO Drowned Valley and
XIII him; and II he could catch
Mixes daughter. too. he'd spoil her
face FOR life"
What next" demanded the
Amarillo daily news. [volume] (Amarillo, Tex.) 19??-current, 1922-11-03
TWINS MEET HUMPTY

Nancy and Nick landed on the Hump
IS Star.
The journey had been quite easy Tor
al they did was 10 make a wish and
whiz. whlfr There they were on nice
bright, shiny star all flat on top and
with n big castle in the middle.
The Twins looked around curiousD.
A road led up and down and over hill
and through valley and across a
bridge. but no one was In sight.
Nancy and Nick followed the road
and by and by they came to a high
stone wall Still no one was In sight.
But suddenly they came face to face
with the most curious person. II was
an egg. my dears. but with arms and
legs and a face.
without so much as hello" II start
ed 10 talk.
Isn't that the sllllest piece" II re-
marked.
What piece?" asked Nancy curious
~.
THE one that goes. 'Humpty Dump
Amarillo daily news. [volume] (Amarillo, Tex.) 19??-current, 1922-11-03

~ sat on a wall Don't you think it's
silly "
mo" answered Nancy.
Neither do L. sald Nick.
Wen. Il is just the same" said the
egg. "and I'll tell you why. In the first
place I'm Humpty Dumpty! And In
the second place. when l fell off tho
wall. / didn't get hurt.
But the poem says" began Nancy.
Eyes. | know what Il says" inter
rupted Humpy Dumpy. II know all
about II. That's why it's silly. IL says
that all the kings horses and all the
kings men couldn't put me together
again. Now doesn't q? Do you know
Why"
mo" answered the Twins.
Because didn't break" laughed
Humpty Dumpty. Il fell into feather
bed"
The Twins were so astonished that
they forgot 20 ask about Mother
Goose's broom.
Go BE Continucdl
Amarillo daily news. [volume] (Amarillo, Tex.) 19??-current, 1922-11-03
GREAT

Lloyd George. IN a vote getting
speech, saws the money his
country owes us is nothing to
the debt we owe England because
OF the benefit we have derived
from great Englshmcn - John
Wesley, Shakespeare, the Pilgrim
Fathers, etc.
Start balancing the books this
way and there's no end TO II. How
much does England owe Us for
the benefits she gets from dis
covericS Of great Americans such
as Edison and the inventors of
alrplanc- street car, auto. auto
matte machine, sewing machine.
etc, More than all the money in
the world
Amarillo daily news. [volume] (Amarillo, Tex.) 19??-current, 1922-11-03
Lubbock Has New Department Store.
Special 10 The Eeu

Lubbock. Nov. among the new
businesses established In Lubbock IL
the new Department store. opened last
Thursday by Baker.Hemphill Company.
This new store Is modern in every re-
spect, typical Of the stores operated by
this concern in West Texas and Okla.
homa and rs quite a credit 10 Lubbock.
In making its bow to the people OF Lub.
hook and the South Plains the new firm
on last Thursday evening was host 10
hundreds Of peopla at It's store where
music. flowers added 90 the attractive
display Of bright new merchandise and
delighted thu large crowds attending.
The choice 81 Lubbock for the loca.
ton Of this latest link In the chain OF
stores operated by BakerHemphill.
Pos,on.TIanna combination emphasizes
how rapidly this section is forging TO
the front by the character OF business
that IL being attracted.
Amarillo daily news. [volume] (Amarillo, Tex.) 19??-current, 1922-11-03

from q 20 90 years of lost youth
This patient is Arthur Evelyn
Iiardct Of London. England.
Twenty months ago, when he was
"a. Arthur hobbled over 10 Paris
and had Doc Nonofi sew some
monkey glands in his abdomen.
This operation usually is per-
formed slightly below the appen-
/ dix and just under the skin. The
glands. absorbed, travel through
/ the system and rcJuvenatc lost
powers.
| Arthur, now % reports that he
I is very active rising at o and TAX
/ ing cold bath every morning,
and walking briskly eight miles
after breakfast He says he's full
OF pep all day.
And grasp this Arthur, who
formerly was almost entirely
bald, now is growing a heavy new
head Of hair.
What is one mans meat may be
another mans poison. What re-
juvenatcs Arthur Evclyn-Liardct
might have opposite effects on
another.
So far, only a very few old men
have experimental with the mon
key gland operation. Their cases
are exceptional. The average re-
suit Ga general rulc) will not be
known until the operation has
been performed on many thous-
andS.
Barring his new growth Of hair
Arthur's evidences OF a restora-
ton OF vigor might easily result
from Imagination. or scli-hypno-
tism by his faith in the power OF
glands.
People who are considering
taking a chance on the monkey
gland operation should keep this
in mind and weigh it cautiously.
FlRST-lt takes several years
for glaudular treatment 10 reveal
its effects. and as yet 1t is un-
known whether these effects are
more than briefly temporary.
SECOND - The fountain Of
youth operation consists of
trausplantiug iutcr,ttial glands
from a chipanzce into a human
These glands form only one unit
...iH 90 40 least eight other
endoctrinc glands in the human
bod. thyroid. alrcuals. pituita-
~ plneal, pancreas, etc.
lnkering with any one Of
t'.,c gland, which are very del
icatcly adjusted and balanced.
may q. e. a.. h.lauc. md aiiec
oth g. r Decided
... m...,t. effect. 600 ..
... .H.t. .. ... nH mind
....'.# ...w. u..
.. ... .n', ...U u.
r.. w.i. ..rn.
.Hay
Amarillo daily news. [volume] (Amarillo, Tex.) 19??-current, 1922-11-03
PANHANDLE PRESS
Wants Amarillo to Get Fair

Lockucy Bcacon'-An an Panhandle
Plains Fair b. being staged by the COM
mcrc.al Interest and Amarillo business
men. The Panhandle Plains Chamber
81 CONNER held a meeting az Tul!a
last saturday and the matter was thor.
uughly discussed plainvicw put IN a
bid Tor the fair. and a. result scaled
bids Tor the fair location will De re-.
ceiVed by the secretary later. and loca.
ton made. We favor regional fair.
and believe Amarillo Is the logical 10.
cation Tor same, provided that Amarillo
people viii piuanco the proposition.
Amarillo has been little bit short on
the fair business. undertaking A Pan.
handle Plains Pair few years sgo and
letting q de for want of funds after
holding one or two fairs ~ she gets
the location this time she will have 10
make up her mind 20 dig up good and
strong. The benefits 90 Amarillo IL IN.
estimable. and In view II the fact that
Amarillo VIII receive more benefits from
the location than outside towns she may
expect 20 have % put up money for
grounds. buildings etc We are for
Amarillo " Amarillo l. In earnest and
vii 20 down In her pockets for the prop
or support e tue fair.
Amarillo daily news. [volume] (Amarillo, Tex.) 19??-current, 1922-11-03
speeial 10 Tia New

sPEARMAN. Nov. MANY old.
timers ATTENDED the big free fair a. Guy.
mon last week. The following are some
~ the attendants there who lived IN
Texas County for years or more. John
tanners, J. c. Dennlson. Boss Neff.
Doc Ross. 4. +. Powers. J. I. Steele,
John Caple. Curt Lowe. J. ". Gator.
Allen Walker. G. c. Hood. T. J. McDcr.
mott. Joe Fuest, ar-nn Wright. Geo.
Wes'mocrland. Gus Cots. Tom STRAIT.
ton. Henry Hitch. Harry Clark. II. n.
Quinn. I'd Hazelion, Pearl Calvert ana
Bili Ewing. Some of them had not seen
Amarillo daily news. [volume] (Amarillo, Tex.) 19??-current, 1922-11-03
Court House Contract let.
Special 10 Inc New

LITTLEFIELD. Nov. 1.-The Com.
missioners' Court has let the contract
for the new courthouse nj Olton TO J.
b. Maxcy. The courthouse will bo OF
brick and modern throughout, II will
be small but there will be ample room
for the county's present needs. The
complete cost will be about $40. 900.