davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1922-11-16
xS u }II.|| $[

Judge Owl is very clever and very wise
Very well. You arrest him." said
Mr.. Coon. Il know he has my bright
tin spoon, and | hope he has kept it
bright. would not care a rap about
it if it is not shiny"
Mr.. Fox had to wait until he caught
Mr.. Crow on the ground, and one day,
when he did. he crept up behind him
and caught him by one leg. I arrest
you, Mr.. Grow, for stealing Mr.. Coon's
bright tin spoon,'' he said.
prove itp cawed Jimmy Grow.
How do you know stole it,"
I'VE will let Judge Owl decide that. y
answered Mr. Fox. "He is very wise.
you know"
He will have to prove | have the
spoon, and he can't do that, said Mr..
| Grow. "He has got to catch me with
it, and he can search me if he likes !;
he won't find it."
Judge Owl looked very solemn and
wise as he sat on a low limb Of a
tree looking down on Mr.. Grow and
Mr.. Fox and Mr.. Coon as they sat on
the ground. "We will hear what the
prisoner has to say" he said.
There were many other wood folk
there, all listening to what the judge
said but now every eye was turned on
Jimmy Crow as he began to speak.
II have not got his tin spoon" said
Jimmy, looking very boldly at Judge
Owl. "You can search under every
feather on me, judge, and you won't
find it."
Jimmy ruffled his feathers as he
spoke, and all the animals began to
wonder if, after all, Mr.. Coon was not
mistaken, for of course, the spoon
would have fallen if Jimmy had it hid
den
well, perhaps you did not take it,
said Judge Owl II know one thing ;
the one who did steal Mr.. Coon's
bright tin spoon hasn't any tail
feathers; he has lost every last
feather"
'They were all there this morning, :
said Mr.. Grow, looking around at his
tail before he thought what he was
doing.
"You are the thief, just as
4
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1922-11-16
: Took Him Down a PEG.

You have, no doubt, among your
acquaintance a person who is of the
belief that without them the world
could not wag on. The other day one
of this sort of individuals received the
shock of his life when he returned
from a three-month sojollrn in Europe.
The night after he arrived in Wash
ington he visited the home of a young
woman upon whom he has matrimonial
designs. There were a number of
others present that evening and he at
once endeavored to monopolize the
conversation and started to relate in
detail his experiences on the other
side of the pond, when the adored one
cooingly said: "Why, Percy, have you
been away Washington Star.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1922-11-16
"Mistus" Day.

1t was the 18th of November and a
darby down South was asked if he
knew what was being celebrated that
day.
"suttinly, suh," he replied; "Mistus
day, subj"
"Arrnistice day, SAM" he was cor
rected.
mo, suh-mistus day, sub. You see,
we were ordered tub go over the TOP
dat mornin' when along comes de news
dat de war was over, so the Germans
done mistus, sub; dey done mistus. -
Everybody's Magazine.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1922-11-16
The Clock.

Boss No. / told Smith never to watch
the clock. So Smith came in half an
hour late and was fired.
Boss No. 2 told Smith that he must
watch the clock, so Smith quit prompt.
ly at quitting time and lost an increase
in pay.
Boss No. left it to Smith, who
watched the clock carefully in the
morning and ignored it at night. so he
became "slave."
Finally Smith chucked the clock out
in the alley and was elected president
of the company. Richmond Times
Dispatch.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1922-11-16

thought" said Judge OWL go home
and get that spoon, or you wiz lose
all your feathers"
1t was no use to deny it now. Jimmy
Grow knew that when he turned
around and looked at Lis tail and made
that remark he had acknowledged his
guilt, so off he flew, with flock Of
BIueiays around him to make sure he
did not run away.
wasn't Judge Owl clever to catch
Jimmy the way he did," asked Mr..
Coon as he sat IN the moonlight talk
ing it over with Mr.. Fox and Mr.. Fox,
who admired a clever trick, allowed
that Mr.. Owl was a very clever old
bird
10 by Mcclure Newspaper syndicate.)
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1922-11-16
POISONED GLUE FOR BIBLES
Particular Protection Necessary for
Books Intended .or Circulation in
the Gilbert Islands.

Not only must Bibles be attractively
bound and well printed, but some of
them must be perfumed, perpered and
poisoned as we'll Bibles going to the
Gilbert islands contain in the binding
glue and the paste which festens the
cover a mixture { oil of Groves, cay
enne pepper and corrosive sublimate.
This is to ward off a certain worm,
peculiar to these islands. which de-
stroys the bindings of books. Twelve
hundred such Bibles have been sent
recently by the United States Bible So
ciety on their 15,cO0-mile journey to
Ocean island by way of Sydney, Aus
tralia. Rev. D. Hiram Bingham, the
famous missionary translator, gave his
life to the preparation of the Bible in
the Gilbertese language.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1922-11-16

EARSH voices are usually strained
L 4 voices, for very few persons
know how TO raise the;- voices above
a certain pitch without straining them.
So, if ypu would keep from having
that harsh voice that is now no less
than IL was in our grandmothers' days
frequently looked upon as a sign OF
bad breeding and lack of culture, see
that you do not raise your voice above
a certain conversational pitch, that is
unless you know how to manage it.
It is almost invariably true that the
children who are brought up in the
congested city tenement sections
where their only playground is the
street and where they must shout and
cslI above tho deafening clatter Of the
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1922-11-16
WOMEN need SWAMP ROOT

Thousands of women have kidney and
bladder trouble and never suspect it.
Women's complaints often prove to be
nothing else but kidney trouble, or the
result of kidney or bladder disease.
If the kidneys are not in healthy con-
1dition, they may cause the other organs
to become diseased.
Pain in the back, headache, loss of am
bition, nervousness, are often times symp-
toms of kidney trouble.
Don't delay starting treatment. DR..
Kilmer's Swamp-Root, physicians pre-
scription, obtained at any drug store, may
be just the remedy needed to overcome
such conditions
Get medium or large size bottle inn
mediately from any drug store.
However, if you wish first to test this
great preparation send ten cents to DR..
Kilmer & Co., Binghamton, N. Y, for a
sample bottle. When writing be sure and
mention this paper.-Adyertisem
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1922-11-16

traffic, grow up to have voices cracked
or harsh. This can be helped, doubt
less, if these children are reminded to
modulate their voices.
But sometimes it is in the country
where an overload voice is cultivated.
The housewife, used to having large
country house to herself, with no
neighbors to think of, acquires the
habit of calling, yelling, in fact, at her
children in a way that the city woman
would not think of doing. She calls
upstairs and down, and she calls out
doors and in. And too often it hap
pens that when she is in more confined
quarters she goes on with her high
pitched voice just the same. And her
children are quite apt to pitch their
voices in tune with hers.
Now remember that while 1t is nee
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1922-11-16
CLEVER JUDGE OWL

MIR. COON had lost a bright tin
4V4 spoon, and it was not the first
time that he had lost one. This time,
however, he was not able to get 1t
back from Mr.. Grow because he could
not catch him using it.
"But | know Jimmy Crow has my
spoon There is no one else who would
care enough about bright things to
carry it off" said Mr.. Coon.
But you will have to prove it, said
Mr.. Fox, who was quite wise about
such things. Just because there are
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1922-11-16

Council Bluffs, Iowa.-"A few years
ago after motherhood I could not gain
back nv strength. l developed quite a
severe case of woman's trouble, SUI
fered with bearing pains which would
be so severe I would have to lie down.
I became so weak that all ! wanted to
do was lie and rest. 1t seemed that
every. spark Of vitality had left me.
consulted a doctor and he said nothing
but an operation would help me, but I
would not consent. I had seen DR..
Pierce's medicines advertised, so at
once began taking the 'Favorite Pre-
gcription' and the Golden Medical Dis
covery' and it was not long until
noticed my appetite was returning,
could eat, so l knew the medicine was
doing me good. I took about twelve
bottles and it was well worth it for it
completely restored me to health,
without the operation. Mrs. w. FL.
Avis, 314 S. 10Th st.
All druggists sell DR.. Pierce's Fam
lily medicines-tablets or liquid.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1922-11-16
4 y
The Friendly
Path Waite. I pz Robinson
LIFE INSURANCE
Z ! J + r ) J !

r IFE insurance is one of the great
- est blessings of mankind.
That it has gained the approval and
support of nearly all men of wisdom
and prominence III the country is a
just cause for rejoicing. No one must
be very old to recall the days when
ii large number of people believed life
insurance something which required
one to die to win. Today, it is looked
upon as offering an exceptional oppor-
tunity for saving, as well as protecting
dear ones while men and women labor
to provide the necessaries of life.
Life insurance companies state
ments of distributions to policyholders
or their beneficiaries usually are con-
sidered dull reading But they would
become intensely interesting to every
intelligent person if he were to give
them sufficient study and thought.
Viewed either as a SAFE means of saw
ing or as legitimate means of pro-
tecting the welfare of wives or chill
dren, the cold figures take on new
meaning which ought to increase the
JOY along lifes pathway.
Contradicting the old belief that life
insurance was a Idle to win" PROPOSE
ton, the statement Of one Of the coun-
try's biggest companies shows that this
corporation during 1920 paid out more
than twice as much to living policy
holders as it did to benefciaries of
those who had died. The exact figures
are 1895, 1888 paid to living policy
holders and $50. 453, 75S to beneficiaries.
The work of selling life insurance
isn't nearly as disagreeable as it used
to be- But there are still a great many
who should carry insurance who do
not, and others who should carry more
than they do who lack the courtesy or
good taste to treat insurance statesmen
with respect. Nevertheless, the sales
men, comprising valuable army in
the United States, are brave body
and, to their credit it may be said, are,
as rule, perfect gentlemen They
are trained to smile when rebuffed.
Those who give them the glad
hand" and buy a reasonable amount Of
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1922-11-16
GUST JOFFRE"- THAT'S ALL
Evidently Great French Soldier 10
Also Gifted With a Certain
Sense of Humor.

Lord Curzon, the British foreign
secretary, arriving in Paris, found the
passenger elevator at the Quai dOrsay
station out of order and cheerfully
adopted the suggestion of the station
master that he might use the freight
elevator just as the elevator boy
was slamming the gates shut, there.
came rushing toward the lift thick~
set, elderly man, breathing heavily
He made as if to enter the elevator,
but the attendants waved him off.
81 am just as heavy and as old as
your lone passenger, the man de-
clared, why should you refuse to take
me up?'
Because this is Lord Curzon," re-
sponded the railroad man impress,
sively.
ooh, well, that's all right" replied
the stranger, making for the stairs
I'm only Joffre."
He was given lift.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1922-11-16
Sounds Like a Newlywed.

When we were first married my hus-
band worked on Sunday mornings be
fore breakfast. One Sunday | called
up his shop as usual to tell him break
fast was ready.
When some one answered the phone
l said would you like to have pam
cakes this morning, dearie?"
The voice at the other end of the
line answered: 81 suppose you are
Jacks wife. I'm here helping him, SO
I'll be down to help him with the pan
cakes"
It has been hard for ne to live
down that NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS..
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1922-11-16

to conjecture However it may be,
Jessie signifies "grace of the Lord"
Her talismanic gem is the amethyst,
which preserves its wearer from con-
tagion and protects soldiers from harm
in battle. 1t has a SOLDERING effect upon
one of light or frivolous mind. Sat
urday is Jessie's lucky day and 4 her
lucky number. The priIArose is her
flower.
Jessie has always been favorite
name with the poets, especially the
Scottish poets.
20 by the wheeler Syndicate. Inc)
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1922-11-16

essary always to speak loud enough
to be heard easily, you should never
speak any louder than is necessary to
make your voice reach all your audi.
tors. If you are speaking for people
in this room don't speak loud enough
to be heard in the next room. Modu-
late your voice and you will be sure to
keep it from becoming harsh.
20 by Mcclure Newspaper syndicate)
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1922-11-16

few feathers in frynt of my house,
and the farmer has lost chicken,
does not prove took it. you know"
mo" faltered Mr.. Coon with a smile,
81 suppose it doesn't; but how am TO
prove Jimmy is the thief, Mr.. Fox?
You are so clever-can't you think of
some way to help me get my tin spoon
back?"
Suppose l arrest Jimmy on sus-
picion,' said Mr.. Fox; sand to be fair
about it, we will have one eff Jimmy's
tribe for the judge. He cannot object
to that. and everybody knows that
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1922-11-16

Barbara La MARI finds in acting the
third career which she has followed
with distinction and success. First as
dancer, she began her career at the
age of seven, continuing on up until
she was ranked high as an interpretive
dancer at the age of seventeen. She
then took to writing, and produced six
novels which were converted into mo-
ton pictures. 1t was another step for
ward when she decided to try her skill
at acting. Miss La MARI is native OF
California. She is of medium height
and has dark hair and dark eyes.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1922-11-16
EnnnorfanA 20 aaofEaars
Bears the
Matters of Delicacy.

"Why is Paris permitted to dictate
the fashions?"
Because of our American sense of
propriety," replied Miss Cayenne.
"Fashions have occasionally been such
that no one would want to discuss
them in plain English"
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1922-11-16
sfop the Pain.

The hurt of burn or a cut stops when
Coles Carbolisalve is applied. 1t heals
quickly without scars. SOC and 60c by all
druggists, or send SOC to The j. w. Cole
Co. Rockford, In.-Advertisement
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1922-11-16
New Hair +: .I. !: i; !; !; !;
Tonic Don't get bald get Q-Ban today - It's
much more pleasant. At all good druggists, 75c,
direct from HESSG ELLIS, Chenists ksmphs. Tenn.
Institute of Economics.

To undertake economic research
and to present results in untechnical
form in pamphlets, monographs and
special reports the Institute of Eco
Monies has been founded by the Car
negie corporation at Washington. 1t
is directed by DIR. Harold G. Moulton,
formerly professor of political econ.
omy at the University of Chicago.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1922-11-16
A LINE O. CHEER
BY John Kendrick Bangs.
TEARS

m EARS are sad. there's little
doubt,
But tits well to let them out,
And direct their scalding flow
To the drowning of your woe:
And perhaps before they stop
There will be one little drop
That will fall upon some space
Watering a flower of grace
Beautifying some new day
When it blossoms on the way.
Copyright by Mcclure Newspaper
SyndicateD
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1922-11-16
Ached all I1ome.

A pupil returned after several days
absence:
"Why were you absent?" the teach
er asked.
Il had an ache" replied the pupil.
"Where?"
"At home"
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1922-11-16

Insurance, just as they buy other ne
cessities or as they place loose change
in savings funds, will find more JOY In
following their daily paths.
20 by the Wheeler Syndicate, Inc)
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1922-11-16
A snappv "Yes.D

Daughter-Ma, Mr. Rankleigh is
coming here tonight. If he asks me-
to marry him how shall l answer?
Mother-Promptly, my child.-Bos.
ton Transcript.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1922-11-16
A Girls Views.

Banks are stingy with their
money"
"Hey, girlie?"
Never throw in any for good meas
ure and never hand out samples"
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1922-11-16
Unhandicapped.

North--Did you have any trouble
learning to drive your new car?
West-No; l left my wife at home.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1922-11-16

Neither money nor brains has en-.
abled any one to get "in the swim" at
the north pole.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1922-11-16

A bonnet with presidential bee in
t is expensive millinery.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1922-11-16

There are gems in the classics
often buried deep in duIlness.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1922-11-16

Good luck's principal ingredients
are prudence and industry.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1922-11-16
MIGHT Get Well.

Might Get Well.
"The doctor generally comes in q
hurry" "He knows if he delays you
might not need him."
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1922-11-16

A soft answer will not turn away
the man who is in love.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1922-11-16
The Only Sure Wa,

"Why not go to the races?" What
for?" ITO pick up a little change"
'Tm not a pickpocket."
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1922-11-16

"Whafs in a Nlarne2"
FACTS about your name; it's history;
meaning; whence it Was derived; signif-
canoe; your lucky day and lucky jewel
By MILDRED
MAR SHALL
JESSIE

WT1
Imperial Valley press., 1922-05-19
PORTLAND MAYOR
CHAMPION KISSER

PORTLAND, Ore, May 19.-Mayor
George L. Mayer of Portland simply
can't help it. He goes right along pill
ing up his total as the champion kiss
ing mayor of the United States. He
picks 'em pretty. Recently when Mary
Garden, whom the mayor of Indianapo-
liz was too bashful to kiss, came to
town, Mayor George was on hand to
give her the osculatory welcome.
Last night when the Elks attending
the Hello Bills prosperity jubilee here
enthroned Queen Laura Olbrich, the
mayor was picked to perch the regal
crown upon her pert little head.
The civic auditorium was crowded.
Thousands of eyes were upon hizzonen-
or as he did his stuff. Then, ah, then
having affixed the crown and been
duly applauded for the nifty stunt, he
surprised the already delighted audi
ence by gathering the dainty queen in
to his arms, and oh = you fadeOut.
Imperial Valley press., 1922-05-19
SEMENOFF OUT BY
ORDER OF COURT

NEW YORK, May 19.-The appellate
division of the supreme court today
ruled the civil order of arrest upon
which General Gregorio Semenoff, chief
of the Cossacks, was held invalid. The
decision was unanimous.
The Yourateva Home and Foreign
Trading company obtained the order for
the arrest on judgment allegedly OBJ
tanned in a Manchuria court, charging
Semenoff with appropriating 100000
of the eompany's goods while Russia
was in revolution.
The general, out on $4,000 bail, has
been in hiding since mobs recently
threatened him. charged with numbering
Americans in Russia.
Imperial Valley press., 1922-05-19
MELON MEN WILL
FINANCE INSPECTION
EVERETT TRUE

At their meeting late yesterday af-
ternoon, watermelon growers of lmper-
ial county passed resolution to pro
vide funds for proper inspection of this
years crop, the method of raising the
funds to be decided upon later. 1t is
probable each grower will be taxed so
much per acre or carload of melons
shipped The fund will be used to EN-
ploy inspectors who will make every ef-
fort to prevent the shipment of green
melons. Approximately 5000 acres of
watermelons are planted this year IN
the valley and over 1000 acres were
represented by growers who met yes
torday.
Under California law, inspectors of
Imperial Valley press., 1922-05-19
MILLION DOLLAR
SUSPECTS CAUGHT
United Press Leased Wire

NEW YORK, May 19.-Rounded up
in raids BY postoffice inspectors, two
postal clerks, four former postal en-
ployes and one other man who have
never been in the government service
were arraigned today charged with
stealing $4,000 worth of liberty bonds
from the mails.
Chief Postoffice Inspector Doran who
presented the charges, said he hoped to
connect the men with million dollar
bond robbery last summer.
The prisoners gave the names OF
Gustave Feldman, Morris Steinberg, Ed
ward Folyel, Abraham Goldsmith, Gus
tave Gelles, Irving Weinstein and Harry
Shapiro. The latter has had no con-
nection with the postoffice.
Imperial Valley press., 1922-05-19

mately $4,000 and Il subway $4,000.
At present there are no funds avail
able for building either a bridge or q
subway and in case the latter should
be decided upon, it would be necessary
to conduct tests to see if subway
would be flooded during the rainy sea-
son. This would have to be done by
sinking holes and watching develop
ments when they filled with water.
Euilding II bridge would necessitate ac-
curing considerable land for ap-
rroaches in the vicinity of the crossing,
and this would mean additional eX-
pcnse, it was argued. The state high
WY commission has the matter mnder
Imperial Valley press., 1922-05-19
BRITISH LORDS BAR
WOMAN MEMBER

LONDON, May 10. - Viscountess
Rhonda is not entitled to a seat in the
House of Lords, the committee on priv
ileges decided today by q vote of 90 to
9.
This decision came as a great sur
prise and shock TO feministS throughout
Great Britain for previous action by
the Upper House of the British parha-
ment had indicated Lady Rhonda s
claim to membership in Lords would be
Granted
Imperial Valley press., 1922-05-19
OFFICIALS CONFER
ON INDIO CROSSING

George f. Bowles, chairman of the
good roads committee of the chamber
of commerce, returned last night from
Indio, where he attended u conference
between state highway commission, of
ficials of She Southern Pacific, and the
supervisors of Riverside county, rela-
tive to removing the grade crossing on
the state highway at lndio and making
ar overhead or subway. 1t developed
at the conference that the cost of an
-cNnrhend crnsSinr Mnnld be apprOXi-
Imperial Valley press., 1922-05-19

advisement at present and will make q
decision later as to the advisabllity or
eliminating the grade crossing.
Statistics produced at the conference
by the Southern Pacific officials
showed that 27 trains passed the cross
ing each day., instead of 60 as had
been previously reported.
Imperial Valley press., 1922-05-19

fruit may prosecute growers or shippers
who attempt to ship inferior produce
after il has been condemned by reg
ularly authorized inspector.
Horticultural Commissioner Waite
was present at yesterdays meeting
and assured growers that his staff
would cooperate with them in every
way possible.
Imperial Valley press., 1922-05-19
WAR VETERAN SUICIDE

SEATTLE, Wash, May 19.-Captaln
Robert Cornell, 20, of the tugboat
Ishum and distinguished war veteran,
died this morning from the effects of
a bullet inflicted by himself yester-
day.
Mrs Elizabeth Cornell, his wife, vic
tim of his first bullet, is lowering be-
tween life and death.