Gunnison news-champion., 1922-05-05

and very common. It's just Ike
marriage certificate. only Il unrnar-
r.-s SOU Instead q marrying you;
h4t ! uldn't know il then. And II I'm
going 10 tell this story I've got 10
tell j, just as 1t happened. Of eourseJ
Well. asked Mr. Jones II you could
hly DIVORCES. and u he had them for
+ sale: and yDg ought to have heard
+ those men laugh. There were six Of
. them sitting around the stove behind
u.
oh. yes. my litii. maid tabOye all
rElnEs l abhsT 20 be called a little
maIdl one Of them cried You can
buy them II you've got m0nsy enough:
hur / don't reckon frur friend Jones
. here has got them for sale
. Then they all laughed aEnin. AID
alnks,! nj each other. tThai's another
disgusting thInS-wlnEs when you ask
. perfectly civil question! but whs;
an you do? Stand II. that's ali
There's such a lot ~ things we poor
I women have TO srandD Then they
. quIeted down and hooked very sober
. the kind u sober you know Is faced
with laughs in the back-and began
To tell me what Il divorce really was.
. / can't remember them all. but | can
some of them. OF course | understand
nuv that these men were trying to
. he smart. and were talking for each
other. not for me. And ] knew -
thsn-a little We know n lot more
things sometimes than folks think We
do. Well. a. near as can remember
II was like this:
"a divorce is knife that cuts a
knot that hadn't ought to ever been
ted said one.
"A divorce is jump In the dark
said another.
NO, 1t amt. Its a jump from the
frying pan into the FIRE" pIped up Mr..
Jones.
a divorce is the comedy OF the rich
and the tragedy of the poor" said
little man who wore glasses.
Divorce is nice smushy poultice
that may help but won't heal" cut In
a new voice.
Divorce Is guidepost marked.
HI Ia Heaven but lots OF folks miss
the way. just the same. notice"
spoke up somebody with chuckle.
Divorce is a coward's retreat from
the battle Of life" Captain Harris said
this. He spoke slow and decided. Cap
tain Harris Is old and rich. and not
married. He's the hotels star boarder.
and what he says. goes, most always.
But IL didn't this time. can remem-
hcr just how old Mr. Carlton snapped
out the next.
Speak from your own experience.
Tom Harris. an I'm thlnkin you Amt
1T ter Judge. | tell you divorce is
what three fourths Of the husbands an
wives In the world wish was waitin'
for 'em nj home this very night. But
IL ain't there" | knew. OF course. he
was thinking Of his wife. She's some
cross, | guess and has two warts on
! her nose.
There was more. quite lot more.
/ said But I've forgotten the rest Be-
sides, they weren't talking to me then.
anyway. So | picked up my thread
and slipped out Of the store, glad to
escape But as | said before | didn't
find many ike rhom.
Of cours ilav nnu--,vhat d'yorc.
Is. | mean ftui H's an <afi'ci. They
granted us some kind of decree or
degree, and we're going TO Boston next
Monday.
Its been awful, though-this last
year. First we had to 20 to that hor.
| rid place out west. and stay ages and
| ages. And hated II. Mother did, too.
know she did. | went TO school. and
there were quite a lot Of girls my age,
and some boys; but didn't care much
for them. couldn't even have the fun
Of surprising them with the divorce We
were going to have. found tiey were
going to have one. too-every last one
Of them. And when everybody has .
thing you know there's no particular
fun In having II yourself. Besides,
they were very unkind and disagree
able. and Dragged a lot about their
divorces. They said mine was tame,
and had no sort Of snap to II. when
they found Mother didn't have lover
waiting In the next town. or Father
hadn't run OF with his stenographer.
or nobody had shot anybody. or any
thing.
That made me mad, and let them
zee II, good and plain. l told them our
divorce was perfectly all right and
genteel and respectable: that Nurse
Sarah said II was. Ours was going TO
be incompatibility. for one thing.
which meant that you got on each
others nerves. and just naturally
didn't care for each other any more
But they only laughed. and said even
more disagreeable things, 20 that ]
didn't want to go TO school amy longer,
and I told Mother 50. and the reason.
too, Of course.
But. dear me. wished right Oh that
hadn't. supposed she was going to
be superb and naughty and disdainful
and say things that would put those
Dfpla uhere they hnlonyQd Rnf INV