The Morning Tulsa daily world. [volume] (Tulsa, Okla.) 1919-1927, 1922-11-12
yuTHEN Hillary FoShall Biggs, alias 60 II
w profosa.onl Bggscy, alias the Deacoi
w Ill. M. uf.... .t.vt.J Int, Iit,ror

with theories.
As he grew older and stoutor some Of these
academic views assumed the texture Of personal
convictions and others faded out entirely. As a
man steps along he Is bound 10 some Of the
ideas he has cherished and aoutcd run against tho
actual operations Of existence and, unless he ID
the sort Of MSS who can blow on hIs scorched
fingers and with the same breath still proclaim
that heat isn't hot he quietly and gradually cdIts
into his theoretical phosophIcs some rovisiona
snd clisions.
Bggscy was not primarily q marrying man.
But he was a poet at heart and a commentator by
trade, and, therefore he had not only found hut
had many timcs committed himself 70 some pro-
uounccd opinions ON matrimony, that crucial
institution which hns been moro consistently and
cIhaustvely mootcd, debated, FletchcrizGd and
jugglcd than any other that pcrmits Of language
not excluding politics, larceny, love, liquor
money. war. literature union labor, short skirts
and all other vital issues
Tho views Of bachelors on matrmony havo
been the subject Of much facetous writing, but
they are, nevertheless no inconscquential matter.
For. IL bachelors regard matrimony frivoousy.
or are hard-boiled about 1t, matrimony will suffer
boarish decline, It has been Held, OF course,
that the bachelor has little to say about whom
and when he is to marry, but that Is not entirely
true. The soundcst argument against It is the
thoroughly in the handA of the ladies as the Joke
stors would have us believe there would he no
single men past the age of fifteen. Females arc
essentially and congentay marrieTs; men are
eoHs;it;tiona'iy non-narTiers and the practise OF
matrimony Is abhorrcnt TO them.
But they fall
They fall not altogether through the we'll
placed tears and the nsidous sighs and the orbr
upturned at just the right angle and moment;
they succumb because they really want wives.
The process of mcsmerizng, kneading and final
hooking need not be here detailed Those who
have been through Il understand 1t, and those who
haven't will neither believe It profit by il.
Anyway, this being II tale about matrimonial
theories, let us PROFOUND one:
Man Is born with inherent disincnatlon
against monogamy, ms realized by matrimony---
but he will change his spots II the wrong girl gets
the right chance at him.
BY wrong girl is meant this-if man
should choose his ideal mate, he would probably
cleave her dome with an NJ In week. No mar
riagc is entirely serene, and those which arc
humanity precarious happy In directly OPP
poste ratio TO tho deafness or one may say II
that way) Of the mating.
Marriage must have it's dramatic progress It's
suspense, its doubts, its climaxes, its anti
cmRxes, its surprises, its curtains its spotlights,
its dark scenes, its palace sets and garden back
grounds, It's bright dialogue and its melodramatlc
bombast its problem counterplots its comedy
relief and the million ntricacies of stage "busl-
ness.
Take that from a happy married mani
Ideal mating, as Il has been apostrophiscd pre-
suppcses marriage based or pure, unruaed,
unadulterated love. II poor old marriage had to
live ON that thin stuff, alone, il would be in
worse plight than II is now, and goodness
knows II has reputation to-day that walks hand
in hand with bootogging, musical comedies and
safe-blowng.
Marriage must be founded on love. Just as any
other institution must be good faith good will
and the spirit to give the golden rule at least
hfty-hfty break. The relations between man and
wife demand that love exist and survive. But,
even leaving aside all mundane matters of sub
sistence, support and certified milk for the baby,
the very finest and most ethereal qualities of per-
feet marriage far more dependent upon duty
than upon love. People can live In love without
marriage; but people cannot live in marriage
without the mutual Willingness to meet obga-
tions, II man has signed a ninety-day note
promising TO pay you much, it won't quite
mollify you when maturity arrives to have him
dismiss 1t by saying he loves you Marriage Is a
promlssory note That Is matured on signing and is
never paid of while life eudures.
obligations sounds ugly. But there is moth
ing hostile about debt that one makes Of his
own free will, sober and of the age of consent,
And II two people Of opposite sex, with a natural
attraction for one another, realize that they have
signed notes payable back and forth, and are
honestly willing to take up their matrimonial
paper il comes due (every minute of every
hour from then on) they can and should be rea-
sonably happy, content and blessed with that blue
dodo, happy marriage.
This was not, by any, means, Biggsey's theory.
He thought that marriages were made In
heaven and that loyc--SOme sort of exalted and
exotic existence composed Of throbs kisses and
understanding g'-conSttuted the ruckrb, the
backbone and the whole works of it,
lie felt sure that some day, somehow, some
know IL tustautly-that she would feel il stimuli
taneously--that there would be a touch of the
fingers, a meeting of the eyes a rushing together
90 thq lipS-thrn Utopia
bggsey came from the country, it may be
needless TO add
He had netr seen Just the kind of marriage
he looked forward TO- but he nut that down 10 ~