davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-04-17
Facts and Rumors.

The rumored change in the means of bridge
traffic between Rock Island and Davenport, in
volving double-decking of the Rock Island
bridge leading from Twenty ninth street to the
lisland. in order to accommodate vehicle traffic
land foot passengers, embodies a question of
lively interest to the people of this city. Whether
corroborated by subsequent events or not the
possibilities are of vital Importance. The mere
suggestion of any project that would convert
vehicle traffic from the present viaduct at
Twenty fourth street awakens concern. Back of
what is alleged to be this joint arrangement be-
tween the railroad lines and the United States
government is understood to. be purpose to
divert the Lincoln highway through the tri-
cities and give it shorter cut to Davenport
by way of Twenty-ninth street, which it is
claimed would not be possible in using the
present bridge via Twenty-fourth street
The people Of Rock Island will be glad to
welcome the Lincoln highway, and they will
be proud to be one OF the cities on this great
continental route, IL the change is to be made
but they would not view with favor the aban-
donment of the Twenty-fourth street viaduct
under any consideration. 1t is to be hoped,
therefore, that the plans rumored will not be
sustained by real facts when they develop
There would be no objections to the general
traffic bridge at Twenty-ninth street IL the
Twenty fourth street viaduct could be raised to
accommodate the present situation, but it
should not be abandoned. Meanwhile let US
congratulate ourselves that Congressman Ora
ham has been instrumental in getting S141 900
in the bill to repair the piers of the main
Rock Island bridge. Notwithstanding that it may
have been this good fortune that gave rise to
the recent rumors.
The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-04-17
Th. Wa;pbs of Health.

within the last few weeks OF the
reduction epidemic five score OF
more or less feminine readers, have
| earnestly begged me to tell them
how to reduce superfluous fiesni
wet on careful examination or the
three main dimensions OF a woman,
namely, height. weight and age, l
have been panied and shocked 10
discover that the petitioners were
already several pounds under
weight. 1t is indeed sad pass we
have arrived at, what with bobbing
the hair. yanking out the eye
brows. having all the teeth e1-
tracted. the tonsils removed, the
anterior metatarsal arch obliterat-
de, and last but not least, the Gou
given roundness. softness ana
| plumpness that is the sole attribute
of beauty possessed by many a
hare Drained creature voted obso-
| Iete by the cartoonists who design
| the seasons figure.
/, being still of sound mind, do
by these presents make known to
all whom it may concern that here
after in the future and forever
more l shall give no person ad-
vice or suggestions or Information
| concerning the reduction of weight
or flesh unless that person weighs
undressed over two and one-halt
pounds to the longitudinal inch. /
| have no intention or desire to he
an accessory in the abduction OF
| any female by an unusually high
wind.
To those fair ladies who harbor
an obcession that their flesh is not
| symetrically distributed or at
least not according to the latest
caricatures from the fashion de-
signers, and to those members of
we'll larded bread baskets which
they imagine are chests, l highly
commend little daily exercise.
Speaking of exercise, as l am
frequently, 1 hope the reader will
understand clearly that l am not at
all fond of it myself, though it is
| fine medicine and / force myself
to take it. Nor do 1 imagine that
exercise is a cure all. On the con-
trary, l know many invalids or
semi-invalids are gravely injured
by ill advised indulgence in exer-
else, evens such light exercis as
strolling around the porch or down
| the block. Furthermore l urge
! upon all young persons who get
this fizical culture bug acuteiy
that they invest in some of the
trashier popular magazines and
scrutinize the specimens of "su-
perb manhood" pictured in the
front and rear pages thereof-half
human creatures SO muscle bound
that they could scarcely dodge a
funeral procession and in truth
The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-04-17

John Mccormick, the great Irish tenor,
lowering between life and death, asked that his
friends throughout the world pray for him. And
a day later his physicians announced he had
passed the crisis. John Mccormick was not
afraid to die. but he preferred to live and full
fill his earthly mission. All those who have
heard the sweet notes Of his Mother Machree"
and Il Hear You Calling Ne" will be happy to
know that he is on the way to recovery.
The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-04-17
The Daily Short Story

on the nature of an elaborate func-
ton. The committee rehearsed a
tableau where half a dozen young
people draped in flags would well
come France to their midst The
library was mobbed in a scramble to
read up on France and Paris.
Some of the older women man
aged to get new dresses for the first
time in ten years. Their husbands
figured out that they could afford
this extravagarve, since the pres
ence of the Paris lady in town dur
ing the summer would bring a
great incr ease in business from the
outlying districts. Mr.. Haynes, the
druggist, sent in an order for a new
soda fountain. Wiggers, the misery
landlord, was approached and prom
ised to consider painting his ugly
row of houses across from Mrs.
Parsons home. The ladies' aid made
a large French flag and it hung
across the street between the Ma
sonic hall and the postofice. The
village buzzel and scrubbed and
polished for FIVE days.
Nettie alone made no prepara-
lions. She was sure Paul would be-
come enmeshed in the tolls of the
French adventures" and that
there was no use fighting fate. Paul
! had polished and cleaned his auto
mobile and covered it carefully for
the night Of the dance. When he
neglected to take her for their usual
Sunday drive she wrote to her aunt
in Connecticut, offering to spend
the summer with her
! Mrs. Parsons and her cousin did
not arrive until late Tuesday night.
A perturbed neighbor knocked at
morning and was met by Mrs. Par
sons, briskly getting breakfast.
We were just SO busy down to
Boston that we missed the early
train. And Cally was seasick from
( the boat, too. She's sleeping late
this morning." She would be de-
lighted to go to the dance that night,
Mrs. Parsons was sure.
shes Is nice a little girl as ever
l see she added
Nettie was dressing in her old
rose colored voile when Paul called
up and said he thought be ought to
bring Mrs. Parsons and her cousin
to the dance in his machine. She
, choked back a desire to cry, but she
/ agreed with him and, stubbornly
resisting a temptation to stay at
home, got ready and went with her
brother.
The crowded hall was in a panic
OF suspense a half hour before the
word went around, They are com
| ing" Then it broke I'D into
giggiing, whispering groups. The
tableau was arranged, each one of
the group standing stiffly holding
an armful of roses.
Paul entered first and imme-
diately the band struck up the
"Marsellaise." He looked queer,
fustered and a trife gastly. He
/ gaZed wildly around the room, saw
Nettie, and rushed across to her
i with something of the attitude of
| one fleeing from doom.
How lovely you look" he said
rapturously, squeezing her hand.
Lovely, beside the girl from
Paris?"
'Paris," Paul fairly snorted.
There she is now, Look at her!"
In the doorway, shrinking behind
Mrs. Parsons ample purple gowned
! figure, was a girl, timidly twisting
her red hands in the skirt of her
striped muslin dress. Her mouse
colored hair was pulled up shame
lessly, exposing her ears. She
| blinke1 increasingly in the glare
of the uncovered electric bulbs.
Inc tableau stood as il petrifed
The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-04-17
THE GIRL FROM PARIS.
BY Miss Lillian Dougherty.
Copyright, 1922, by Wheeler Syn
dipoto TnpO

BY Miss Lillian Dougherty.
| Copyright, 1922, by Wheeler Syn
dictate, Inc.)
Going away, Mrs. Parsons"
Just to Boston for few days to
meet my cousin from aPris. She's
going to visit me all summer. As
nice little girl"
From Paris?" Nettie Ketchum' S
eyes opened wide with surprise and
dismay. The acknowledged belle of
Pineville could hardly be expected
| to greet news of visitor from Paris
with equanimity.
Yes. She's lived there all her
life. She's 10 now. Well be back
Wednesday," Mrs. Parsons said, and
hurried away to the station.
Before noon the whole village was
| bubbling over with the news of a
visitor from across the water. From
Paris Of all places! The young
people gathered in the drugstore
and discussed the startling event,
the men with JOY, the girls less en-
Enthusiastically.
"She sure will liven up this
burg" Paul Tinker remarked. And
I'll say we need it" Paul kept the
only garage in town, and owned a
roadster He was considered Nettie
Ketchum's undisputed property.
Just now he glowed with what Net
! tie considered disloyal anticipation.
"Of course she'll be at the Ma
sonic dance Thursday night" Mile
| Carson said. Il just can't wear my
lavender silk again"
81 say, Paul, OF man, she'll talk
French, you know. We ought to
! know a few words to sorta give a
'juda spirit to our conversation. "
Jasper King turned confidently to
Paul. The others looked at him
with surprised respect.
There's French books in the Ii
brary," Mile offered.
Before long the group separated
deliberately, going in different di-
rections.
! Ten minute later, Nettie ran into
Paul at the foot of the library steps.
I've been trying to get Main
| Street for the longest time" she
murmured.
Paul said nothing, but once inside
the door he melted into the dark
recesSes in the back, where he
II ApP0u OfeI jasper Juggling OuSly
volumes from the lower shelf.
| Nettie backed out of the reading
! room when she caught glimpse of
Mile pouring over a fashion maya
zine. Miss Benson, the librarian,
was putting mounted photographs
around the rooms.
! Il found these views of Paris. and
thought they'd be interesting, since
we are to have q visitor from there
| she said.
| Forlornly Nettie wandered home.
She could not afford a new dress,
and, anyway, she felt doomed to be
eclipsed by the brilliant foreigner
/ She stified a sob as she saw the in
terloper dashing about in Paul's
car. with Paul making love to her.
1t was sure to happen so.
In another day Pineville got busy
in earnest, preparing a welcome TO
the stranger She should not find
things too different from her Paris
| home If they could help it.
| The village Emporium decorated
/ one of its windows with two hands
clasped. one labeled Paris" the
other "Pinevilie." each emerging
from the folds of its national colors.
The other window boldly dis
played the dusty. shop-worn bolts
of Our Latest Imported French
Ffannels-" In that window, too,
| was the sign, lei On Parle Fran
Gals"
The Masonic dance began to take
The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-04-17

10 each indiytduaL So aItsl.slua W. u
three and three-fourths millions
barrel in 80 days. The Dos Bocas
well, south Of Tampico, Mexico, is
estimated to have given over five
millions in two months. Other
prod1gious gushers are in Rou
mania, Russia and Mexico.
@. What is a fly wheel?
P. y. l.
A A fly wheel is a heavy wheel
for opposing and moderating by its
inertia any fluctuation of speed N
the machinery with which it re-
wolves. Such a wheel is used on
an engine crankshaft to counter
act variable pressure during the
stroke and carry the engine over
the dead centers.
Q. 1 saw a reference to John
Haywood who said, "a byrde' i'll
the hand is worth ten in the weed.
Who was this John Haywood?
B. e. B.
A. John Haywood was an Eng
fish author probably born in 1897
and probably died in 1880. He was
a fayorite at the courts of Henry
VII, Mary, and Edward VI. He
excelled in writing epigrams.
Q. What city in this country
leads in the manufacture of tacks?
E A.
A. The city of Taunton. Mass. is
the great Matchmaking center of the
world.
The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-04-17

@. In the corner of Northern
Pacific railroad stock in 1901. how
high did the stock go? P. S.
A. at that time, the price OF the
stock rose abruptly to 1000 bid.
Q. Are Gaelic and Celtic he
same language? J. r. c.
A. Celtic languages are a group
of languages to which Gaelic be-
longs. Other Celtic languages are
Welsh, Breton, Irish, Scottish and
Manx.
@. What oil wells are the great
est gushers? w. S.
A. The United States geologi-
cal survey says that there is M
tabulation Of the largest oil gush-
ers. There is one we'll in Bib Eli
bat, in Russia, which gave nearly
The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-04-17

Joseph Tumulty has been taken TO task by
his old boss, Woodrow Wilson, for some orator
ical indiscretions. 1t inevitable that one
talking and writing so volubly as Tumulty has
been since leaving the White house should
eventually put his foot in it.
The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-04-17

SO Jasper stepped up and said,
"Parle VOC"
The girl Uttered bashfully "Ain't
he a scream?" she appealed to Mrs.
Parsons.
Jasper stepped back a trif1e
stunned.
Nettie looked inquiringly at Paul.
He slipped her hand under his arm
and led her to seat on the window
ledge.
She came on the boat from Port
land" he exploded. She's from
Paris, yes, Paris, Maine!"
The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-04-17

Marguerite Matzenauer. the singer, rid OF
her latest husband. declares she has abandoned
quest of the ideal husband She might try the
old-fashioned plan of waiting to be chosen as
an ideal wife.
The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-04-17

About time for beginning of agitation against
scant bathing suits. 1t doesn't do any harm, but
is powerful business stimulus, filling the sum-
mer resort hotels and increasing the railroad
passenger receipts,
The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-04-17

Outburst by an insane woman disturbed
John D. Rockefeller, Jr, at religious worship
yesterday. Otherwise John D. might not have
drawn his customary Monday morning story on
the front pages of the newspapers.
The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-04-17
OH WE'LL. NOTHING CAN N.Kr ,

Sir: At the conclusion of NJ
latest comedy Mrs Arbuckle "expresseS tas
thanks to McNabb by giving him a resouns ner
kiss Very nice; very nice And one of - s
did not cry get ill as did "Onr Me- aat ne
being kissed for the first time by a eove-ner
and a mayor in the same day" so'efnor
SOLOMON PTFErE
The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-04-17

Live birds on women's hats is the latest in
Paris. And an investigation would probably
reveal bats in the belfry.
The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-04-17

Tommy O'Connor's whiskers ought to be
long enough by now to permit of his return to
Chicago to settle down among his old friends
and live in peace the remainder of his days.
The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-04-17
Argus Information Bureau

q
full ana
u
to
The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-04-17

If the coming summers fly crop seems
larger than in former years you will realize
that you failed to do your early swatting duty
The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-04-17

It has been figured that some fox rotters
go 80 miles in an evening. And some OF them
don't stop far this side of hades.
The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-04-17
Uhr Tnnthatnrr
axxx Eus uArs ANcTExf KNEzfx.
Dull CARE
VINO passxrxns rm UNIovxD ccsA
uxWABBt
STAINING LAZY POETS.

STAINING LAZY POETS.
(If the minor poets dared to employ the SLOPPY
riuaiur approved By poets. he would writ.
thusl
Dear heart! If to reveal my love
A fitting voice to me were given,
I'd sing a strain that we'll might move
To envy all the choir in heaven!
I'd HYMN your brow so smooth and fair,
In smoother stanza, fairer line,
And all the joyous birds that were
In hearing9 in the song would join
I'd sing your tresses, zephyr-blown,
Your cheek, enriched with mantling blood,
Your eyelids, modestly cast down.
Your dewy lips. fairys food!
Ye muses. nine, that far above
Your former earthly haunts have gone.
Revisit now the sacred grove
Where once your heavenly beauty shone.
From your ethereal dwellings come,
And see upon this lowly earth
How fire celestial makes its home
For once upon humble HEARTH
What maid beside her ever was
Aught but a frame for hanging clothes?
Or how compared, except as grass
Rivals the glory of the rose?
Thus would I sing, if had been
Baptized in Hippocrene's river.
And then my song unto my queen
Would live forever and forever
Ted Robinson in Cleveland Plain Dealer.
The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-04-17

Princess Mary of England is to visit her
mother in-law. 1t is to be hoped that the vaude-
Vile wits will not fail to make proper use OF
this incident.
The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-04-17
HEALTH TALKS
BY William Brady, NJ.
Noted Physician ard aurnor.

most of those superb chaps are
overtaken by such a cortege long
before their time for hypertrophied
muscles are like parasites sapping
mans energy. 1t is exceedingly
precarious business for a sedeu-
tary person to indulge in any ex-
ercise which is likely to develop
powerful muscles. II helps ones
health or resistance against dis
ease not one whit to grow huge.
bullying muscles. The professional
strong man" is neither long lived
nor equal to any real test of en-
durance. The freak with the enor-
nous muscular development never
wins any races, nor does he shine
in any of life's contests.
The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-04-17
WE promised faithfully that

Would reach our home at o'clock
T is now sos and-hully gee,
- We're due to get fearful shock,
E. E MIG
The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-04-17

PROBABLY there doesn't live a greater
stickler for accuracy in rime than the author
of Enter Jerry. Any contrib who puts over
a sloppy rhine on Ted Robinson deserves a
niche in the h. of I.
Tennyson, we assume, comes under the
classification of major poets Here's a sample
of major poetic riming from "The Lady of
Shalott":
From the bank and from the river
He flashed into the crystal mirror,
'Tirra lrra, by the river
Sang Sir Lancelot."
The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-04-17

strong man" is neither long lived
nor equal to any real test of en-
durance. The freak with the enor-
nous muscular development never
wins any races, nor does he shine
in any of life's contests.
Questions and Answers.
Beware Medical Latin-I am suf-
fering with what the doctors claim
is cardiac heart. w. G.
Answer-Well, you have plenty
of company. Cardiac is a medicine
term which means of or pertaining
to the heart. You must have mis-
understood what the doctors said
Even if you have something the
matter with your heart, | can give
you no advice about it. That is
always a matter to submit to your
own physicians judgment.
The Morning TORTURE am a
great believer in exercise, and il
is my practice to exercise morn
ings until l am dripping with per
spiration, then jump into a cold
tub, then take a good rub with a
coarse towel. discontinue in
cold weather for fear of taking
cold, but have started in again.
have no shower at my disposal. Is
there anything detrimental in this
practice? 1 do not feel SO good aft
er exercise when l omit the cold
bath. P. M. A.
Answer-Ouch, say I. However,
if you feel refreshed and warm uu
we'll after the cold plunge, it is
healthful for you, in cold weather
as well as in mild weather.
cannot understand the mental pro-
cess whereby you follow such a
practice yet harobor a fear of TAX
ing cold"
Weaving Now-My baby II
months old, has II teeth is
breast fed. l thought of weaving
her. Some say to wait till the
signs are right. Others say !
should have weaned her months
ago. MRS. c. K.
Answer-The signs are always
right. 1t is better not to nurse a
baby beyond the first year. Send
a stamped, self-addressed envelope
and ask for general Instructions
The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-04-17

AN italian astronomer announces the stars
tell him it is probable President Harding will
come to the Genoa conference. Now, how many
stars told him that? Three, is our guess; and
we'll bet they shone on a bottle of (you guessed
it, Three Star Hennessy.
HELPING YOU IS THE FONDEST THING
WE ARE OF
Dear Mac: Please help me out! When l
was in Davenport few weeks ago mentioned
to some friends that your column
[ellipsis indicates censorship account we con-
ductor's extreme modestyl and rather boosted
that 1 contrib. Since then I've had a
letter from Jewell. She says she is now a
constant reader but fails to find anything by
Peggy. The truth is, Mac, that since I've con-
fessed to being contrib I'll be doggoned if
I've even had glimmering of an idea worthy
of sending you. What to do?
Chicago 4-14-22. PEGGY.
1T is said" writes the paragrapher of the
Blue Island Qll) Sun-Standard. that chickens
get tough if they run around too MUCH
1t is said, too, that chickens always come
home to roost-but some of 'em don't do any
such thing.
The Wheeling intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1903-1961, 1922-06-22
! THE THEATRES
VICTORIA THEATRE

Charlotte TTynters. Weddings own
beautiful and talented actress. and her
popular associate players. are making
the hit Of the season this week al the
Victoria Theatre In William Hodge {
great ComCdy-drama. The Man From
Home" which has been acclaimed by
the many who have seen u as on" u:
the greatest plays on the American
stage today. There is action aplen'T
and aside from a few dramatic scenes.
QhOundS in refreshing humCr.
As Ethc! Simpson. the orphan. Miss
WINTERS scores perhaps her oigSesc trt-
jumps Of The seasons. and at the sam"
tive Is afforded occasions for the dis
pldl - exquisite gowns. Her Inimitable
personality. wcll-mndulated voice and
the general Characteristic smile Of
youth. all tend 20 make her part high
" appreciated by the attentive audi
e"ce
M NcWa,ters. Fred Nelson. Edna
Marshall, James Philips. Owen Coll. Mr.
wcrsick and George Dill are seen in
the principal parts. while the balance OF
the company htS in nicely. The story
Is full OF laughs. serious moments and
gorgeous scenery. II Is in four acts
Last night a full house was present,
advance seat sal" indicating a clean
ul, for the rest Of the week There will
Be ~ matinee today and Saturday, with
the regular evening performances dur
Ing the present attraction.
The Wheeling intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1903-1961, 1922-06-22
ACCUSED CLERGYMAN
PRAISES UNDERWORLD

Los Angeles. calf. June 2l.-Al-
though credited with having eliminated
segregated districts from several CALL
fornia ci.ics the Rev. Donald D. Stewart.
hold in tho county jail here, facing
nharges OF committing b!gamy In -FOUR
states and Fleeing a quartet OF wives
cut Of thousands Of dollars declared
today that he found that men and wom-
en- Of the underworld have Eeater
hearts and were more charitable 10 him
than the members Of his own church.
Il have gone down and down from
the time that I was unfr"ckcd in OAK
land in 1917" Stewart said. but men
and women Of the underworld were
kinder and more char':anle to me than
members Of the church whose worship
l had led. Not one Of my flock stood
by me ia my trouble.
Stewart denied the charges OF
hiGamy.