davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
New-York tribune., 1922-10-25
Mother Goose in Politics By Emma Bagses
Mother Goose has gone in for poll.

Mother Goose has gone in for poll
tics.
Gone are the days when the simple
Joys Of the kitchen and the Banbury
Cross road were enough for her home
keeping soul. A right up and coming
old lady, she prtdes herself on keeping
abreast of the times, and is really TAX
ing up politics in serious way, or at
least as seriously as could be expected
considering her habits for the last
couple Of centuries. What she hopes
to do is no less than to bring about a
change in the Fundamental Attitude Of
the American people toward their po-
litical responsibilities, change which
she believes can be effected only BY
arousing the interest Of young children
in voting and running for Office.
We found the dear old soul as live
ly and genial as ever, in spite Of the
pile of Congressional Records on her
desk and the photographs Of model
polling places which had replaced the
water colors Of Mary Mary's garden on
her wall. She had on the plain black
silk frock with the white muslin collar,
just like Lady Astor's, which all the
ambitious women Of Our Town have
adopted as political uniform, but the
cat and the fiddle were still on the tut
fet and the old clock was still ticking
away in the corner Though we were
grieved to note that Mother Goose
seemed to depend more on her wrist
watch for the actual time Of day..
whats this? What's this I" she
chirped, staring at us through hsr
specs, "oh, yes, about the nursery
rhymes. Just wait until r ring for tea.
There are some fresh tarts from the
pieman's and I've been SO busy about
that workmen's compensation for poor
little Jacks broken crown that I
haven't had any lunch."
They were good tarts. They say the
pieman has taken his wife into part
nership now, rs It was choice be-.
tween letting her have career in the
home or going into the movies.
"Well, my dear, this is how il hap
pened," said Mother Goose at last.
"You see, after the women got the
New-York tribune., 1922-10-25
Is,cosrigible Pacifists

There IS little to choose between
the pacifists who, with Governor
Baxter of Maine, deplore the move
Iaent to keep our navy up to the
strength allotted to it ir the 5---5--3
treaty and those who welcome cut
ting down cur army rntil it is no
longer efficient. They are in the
same class an former SECRETARY Of
War .saker. who, in ar official bulje-
lin Of his department shortly after
we had st.ctared war against Ger
many. stated that he delighted In the
fact that when we entered the war
we were not, like our adversary,
ready for it.
sThese pacifsts either deliberately
refuse to recognize or else are un-
ssble TO understand that the pleas Of
Secretary Weeks and cf the advo-
cites of Navy Day are merely to
mako efficient use Of the establish.
foents Tor national defense. Under
New-York tribune., 1922-10-25


government to remedy conditions.
but these wera Of no avail, and the
government itself naturally suffered
from the national disaster.
Although General Crowder, repre-
senting President Harding, has done
much to straighten out the result
ing political tangle, he has been
handicapped by his lack of training
in financial matters. The tasks Of
political readjustment once conf
pleted, what Cuba has needed has
been skilled financial advice and as
sistance.
1t is this which Governor Harding
will be asked to give. A banking
system remains to be established and
the conditions Of new s50,000,0W
loan TO be determined. This is a
task for a financial rather than II
military expert, and one which Gov
ernor Harding can ably perform.
New-York tribune., 1922-10-25
The lngratituele of Woman

Colonel Harvey has done real
service in reminding man of the orig
inal plans and specifications by which
the first woman was laid down.
aPlainly she was designed as and
through many early ages continued
to be hclpmeet to man. If perhaps
suggestion of a soul passed over
into her along with Adams rib Ii
was not of sufficient Importance to
be noticed by commandments or
affect her status in the universe.
Mans responsibility toward her
was clear and simple--much like
that of responsible mechanic to-
ward useful mechanical contriv-
ance to-day. No need to bother
about her development. When she
wore out, replace her. Regarded
from the exclusively masculine point
Of view, she was undoubtedly the
greatest labor-saving device ever in
vented.
But women, born to be unerateful.
refused to accept this theory. They
have persisted, year in and year out.
IN trying to grow souls. Thence has
flowed practically all our troubles.
the woman problem, the servant
problem, fapperism. The new deca-
logue that Colonel Harvey demands
for women is the least of mans
worries.
Clearly the time has come for TAX
ing stand. Women say they must
have souls. But why must they? Or,
II they must, cannot a new woman
be invented out Of steel and springs.
or perhaps out Of ectoplasm, which
Will restore to man his dear, old.
hustling helpmeet of the Pentateuch.
the Zend Avesta and the Talmud /?
Isn't this the idea t,ward which the
colonel, in his sly and subtle way,
would lead his fellows?
New-York tribune., 1922-10-25
The Padded Budget

IL the Office of Mayor Of New
York were a life job, paying SO 900
year for an assistant to Mr.. Hylan
might be an excellent Investment
for the taxpayers, providing, of
course, that the assistant could be
selected for ability and fitness.
Few occupants of the Mayors
Office have been more in need of
assistance than the present incum-
bent. Had he at his elbow a man
conversant with the transit situa-
ton, who was aware that relatives
of the Mayor ought not to be in.
suring municipal bus operators and
who had taken the trouble to study
the science Of municipal government,
Mr.. Hylan would be far less damag-
ling as public servant.
But the citizens hope in trife
more than three years to elect a
Mayor with the ability to give the
city businesslike and scientific adj
ministration. In such an event the
Office of assistant Mayor, created by
Mr.. Hylan and his Board of Esti-
mate and tucked away in a corner
OF the budget, will not be necessary.
Few people will believe that Mr..
Hylan would profit much by the adj
vice and counsel of a Mayors helper
although he would unquestionably
profit politically by being able to
confer such an Office on one of Mr..
Murphy's boys. Mr.. Hylan has been
into.erant of advice since he has
been in office. Unhappily for the
city, he believes In doing things in
his own way. One of the results
of that tendency is the bus affair.
Another is the continued traffic
stagnation, which promises to send
him down to history as ''ths double
fare Mayor"
The new office, like those of assist
ants to Commissioners Hirshfield.
Whalen and Enright, also included
in the tentative budget, will lie help
full only to the gentleman to whom
1t is given. Tamn,any has a way
Of providing for it's own whenever
the people can be made to supply
the salaries, and these ingenious
additions to the public pay roll bear
the unmistakab,e Tammany tag.
Unfortunately for the thirteen
commissioners appointed by Mr..
Hylan, no pay advances for them
could be hidden in the budget. and
the fear of publicity forced the
Board of Estimate to refuse to re-
ward them for the present. But Mr..
Hylan has given himself man
Friday and bestowed similar func-
tionaries upon his three favorites.
Hirshfield, Whalen and Enright. If
the citizens stand for that, perhaps
the other ten commissioners will be
taken care of next year.
New-York tribune., 1922-10-25
More Truth Than Poetry
By James ]. Montague
Speaking of Operations

Speaking of Operations
little by courtesy of Irwin 8. cohb].
My stomach, liver, lungs and
heart
Have suffered some disintegra-
tlon,
But no ones taken them apart
At any human service station.
give myself no lofty airs,
But many years I've piled my
calling,
And ! have needed few repairs $,
And never had an overhaulinc.
My upkeep has been very light,
! never yet have needed tow
-, ing.
I've journeyed far, by day and
night,
And all the while I've kept on
going.
Repair If. me men great and wise
Within. their shops have never
lureI me,
Though vowing that by slow
1SSLCCO
I'd turn to junk unless they
cured me.
[ know of course my day will
come,
Whatever is must have an end
ing,
And when my years add up their
sum
My vitals will be past all mend
ing.
A little chap who smiles at me
He just is learning how to
toddle-
Shall take my place, and | shall
be
Discarded, as a played out
model.
But when I'm scrapped they'll
scrap me whole,
No specialists shall overcome
me
And-not to speak about my
Shall take the gifts of nature
from me.
Askance these men of knives |
view
Whenever OH the street / meet
one
l know that when at last I'm
through
I'll be a wrecl--bur a COM
plete one.
New-York tribune., 1922-10-25
Banished by Boston

Boston is such sensitive creature
that it is difficult to rate accurately
the gravity of Miss Isadora Duncan's
high crimes and misdemeanors at
Symphony Hall. Apparently there
were many averted gazes when she
first appeared in full costume; and
later, when feeling the call Of Rus
!sia, she seized upon q piece of her
Grecian drapery and waved it above
her head, there were only few
horror stricken eyes bold enough to
observe the facts.
Was the drapery waved red? And
did Miss Duncan cry aloud that she
was Red? Plainly, when the clas-
sic atmosphere of Symphony Hall
was thus throbbing with wild and
appalling sights and sounds, accu-
rate testimony was difficult to find.
1t may have been green drapery that
wns snatched from it's accustomed
task, and Miss Duncan may have
merely remarked that she thought
well Of the Irish Republic. With
every sensibility on edge, her Puri-
tanical conscience throbbing pain
fully, her spectacles awry. how could
Boston possibly be sure what hap
pened!
Under the circumstances Mayor
Curley took the only sensible and
humane course He banished Miss
Duncan from Boston for all time.
Thus she escapes being jailed for
life, or some similar melancholy end.
and takes her place with the Mac
Monnies "Bacchante" and all the
other parts of Boston that have found
it necessary to live in New York for
their own and Boaton's good. Our
city has gained much through the
years by virtue Of that westbound 5
o'clock express. 1t runs little more
slowly nowadays than it used to. but
1T runs just as surely. Welcome to
Miss Duncan!
New-York tribune., 1922-10-25

, vote we all thought that the political
millennium had arrived. that the womer
would all vote and vote wisely. 1.
hasn't worked that way. Even now,
gr'eva to tell you, in Our Town there
are actually women who say they are
mot Interested
Don't give me credit now for whats
coming. It was the League Of Women
Voters down in Texas who first called
attention to the fact that people are
not trained early enough in politics
and suggested that revise the nursery
rhymes along political lines. You kno.
Psychologists say 1t Is the first six
or seven years Of life that really de-
termine our mental habits. If child
never hears Of voting until he Is TWEEN
ty-one how can he care much Sor 1t
Everybody loves Little Miss Muffes
and Jack Horner. Why? Because they
were their first loves. The first time
q child laughs 1t Is over the COW jump
ing over the moon. His first knowl-
edge Of tragedy is Humpty Dumpty.
Now ths people Of Our Town are lov-
able and entertaining. but they never
gave much attention to politics, an
afraid, and that is why so many chill
dren are deficient in public spirit. We
are trying to counteract this by min
Cling little political lore with their
rhymes"
Old Mother Gooss swept away poor
Jacks compensation documents and
scratched around in her desk until shs
found bundle Of papers.
"How is this to teach little girls
they must always insist on men of
high character for political office? Z" she
chuckled, picking up the first one.
Mary. Mary. quite contrary,
10" does your campaiEn go7
win senator's and Presidents
And honest men all In q row.
And here is another that pokes q
little gentle fun at the conceit Of pub
lie men. who really owe their posi-
tion to the people, you know. but act
sometimes as IL they had done every-
thing ali by themselves:
little Jack Homer stood on the corner
BeEging election pie.
he put In his thumb and pulled out a plum
And said What q great Judge an. i!''
We people tn Our Town. said
New-York tribune., 1922-10-25
The Purpose Of Many Dau

To the Editor Of Tho Tribune.
Sir: ! notice in this mornings is
sue Of 1.-The World" an attack upon
Navy Day, in which It says, ''No pos
sble excuse can be offered for work
ing up popular sentiment over the size
and prestige of the navy, unless st is
intended that the Washington treaty
is to be scrapped and the battleship-
building program dug out of the dis
card. =. The size Of the navy
has been fixed by Congress and special
treaties have been negotiated in regard
to it,,
In commenting on the above ex-
tremely mistaken implications by your
contemporary ! beg to state that the
Navy League stood and stands whole
heartedly back Of the effort made at
the Washington conference Of last
winter to limit naval armament by
agreement. The essence OF the agree.
ment to that end is that the navy Of
the United States be maintained on q
basis Of equality with that Of Great
Britain and fiye-thirds the strength Of
that Of Japan In every essential
respect.
The Navy League suggested Navy
Day for She purpose Of focusing pub
lie attention on this situation, to sup
port the limitation Of the United
states Navy in strict accordance with
the agreements fer the Limitation Of
New-York tribune., 1922-10-25

ornaments and to maintain the United
States Navy In accordance with tho.e
agreements namely: On the basis Of
equality with Great Britain and ave-
thirds the strength Of Japan in every
essential respect.
we ask nothing more and we be-
iieve that anything else falls short Of
supporting the spiris and substance Of
the Washington Conference for tho
Limitation Of Armament.
In this connection / beg to noint ont
that II the United States Navy Is
actually maintained at its full treaty
strength. then the United States viii
DC IN better position to press for
further reduction Of armament BY
agreement when the psychological
moment arrives.
In view of the above outlined cir
cumstances I must confess to total
inability to understand how any
whole hearted American can oppose
the maintenance Of the navy Of the
United States on the basis OF equalitv
With Great Britain and five-thirds Of
the strength Of japan in every respect
nniess he be controlled by the unrea-
soning emotions of the pacitsst on ur-
less he be attempting TO make partisan
capital out Of the national situation.
WILLIAM H. GARDINER,
ice-President Navy League Of tho
United States.
New York, Oct. "a, 1922.
New-York tribune., 1922-10-25

Mother Goose, winking at NE Ia her
old wicked way, I'VE Just can't take
politics too seriously, and I think /. Is
/ good thing.
Maybe, il you laughed at things q
little more, you would be mo.s In
terested in them. Anyhow, have
o. KID this rhyme, though dent
mind telling you--not for publiestsa
that the committee was divided:
There was an old woman who L~k /
a shoe;
She had so maay children she dihk
kEov what to do;
SO she fed them on tariff without srs
And franked them a!I soandiY and WATCHED
them all croak.
"But here Is one that has moral
beyond reproaeh, and Is lesson in
practical politics, too:
Little Miss Kitty sat On COMMITTEES
P!suHtn6 ways and n.ssns:
She said more than she'd ertss
To handsome reporter
And 'twixt them they spilled all the BEAM
Mother Goose apparently had dozens
more Of these revised RI. mes, but We
were interrupted just then by
terrific hubbub outside. We rushed e
the window and beheld the entire
population Of Our Town congregsset
around huge pumpkin shell on ths
top Of which was q wildly gesticulss.
ng young woman, the story Of Who's.
grievances was evidently srousin.
much public feeling.
But Mother Goose had to hide gTin
"Poor Peter-Peter," she Uttered; 20
curse, the law forbids all legal dis
.riminations against women. and Oic
ling Cole will punish him severely fsr
lot keeping his wife on plane OF peg.
ect equality, but don't know -
blame the poor chap much. ARR
all, you can't change human natus
much with woman suffrage. and SONS
times wonder If even nursery rhyrei
will do it."
New-York tribune., 1922-10-25
The Down Town Hospitals

To the Editor Of The Tribune.
Sir: A year ago made contriou-
tion to the Down Town Hospital ~.
ISOLATION, presumably to take care o.
NV obligation to the down town hospf
tai service.
Yesterday was approached Dy
personal friend for contriput'0n :
the Bsekaan Street Hospital. snd ss'
informed that my last years cons1'us
sion did no. cover this hospital ~
friend further pointed out tns. :.
district assigned TO Beekman Ss'se.
Hospital by the City Ambulance bos'a
extended even below Wall Street. oan
you inform me as matter o. puD''s
interest:
tai What are the actual anou'1hs.
districts covered by the Broad Ss1sss
and Beekman Street hospasais :
spectively?
(b) How many hospitals are nsa
bers Of the Down Town Hosp'sss =
scciation7 !.
(c) What allocatfon Of suao' {. .
made to different hospitals " ~
Down Town Hospital Association -,
+ D. cHINNocK
New York, Oct. II. 1922. ~.
r(a) The Broad Street Hosp'sa'
ambulance district includes =
downtown section south Of onAM
bers Street west Of Broadway, z.
south Of Beaver Street esst Z, Z,
Broadway. Tho Beekman Sss.s' I,
Hospital covers the adjacent dis1I's'
to the north. reaching 70 oaus'
Street and The Bowery.
(b1 Only the Broad Street no'
nitaI is connected with the Dos'
Town Hospital Association.
{c) Funds received by the Dos'
Town Hospital Association are avg
Gated only to the Broad Street Ass
|pital. Ed.l
New-York tribune., 1922-10-25

troll over her finances, bedeviling
them In the hope of escaping ac-
countability, or whether the Allies
will step in and, for their own pro-
lection, end the colossal fraud of
currency imitation and remission Of
German taxes.
New-York tribune., 1922-10-25
Our Society of Nations

UH GdlltIk QL q SNiNAS 50 fAAhNS~N
can conference in Washington illus
trates the sort Of international CO.
operation which President Harding
and Secretary Hughes have at pres
ent most in mind. The five repub-
lies are invited to revive those Prov
sions of the semi-federative treaties
Of 1907-also signed in Washington
which experience has shown to
be of value in maintaining peace
and helpful relations among them.
Disarmament and plans for arbi-
trating international disputes are
included in the conference agenda.
Here is a practical venture in in
ternational association. All the
powers concerned belong to one
famiiy-a family recognized as
such for a century. It came into
existence with the Spanish-Aneri-
can revolutions and the proniulga-
tton of the Monroe Doctrine. 1t prac-
tically covers the Western World
world on which some of the Euro
pean statesmen most interested IN
the League of Nations now want TO
confer kind of regional autonomy
within the larger circle.
In this American group the influ-
once of the United States has al
ways been controlling and will
continue to be so. There is no ser,-
Gus desire anywhere to abate it or
snuff it out. If there are American
disputes to be settled the best place
TO settle them is not at Geneva but
on this side of the Atlantic The
republics here are old friends. They
feel at home with one another. They
have co-operated for years in the
Pan-American Union and have regu-
lated their political and commercial
relations in series of Pan-Amerr-
can agreements.
The fact that most of the Latin
American republics are in the
League Of Nations while the United
States is out of it has not initiated
against Pan-American solidarity
Chile and Peru did not take the
Tacna-Arica dispute to the league.
They negotiated settlement at
Washington with the friendly aid
OF the United States. Secretary
dughes successfully ended the long
standing Panama-Costa Rica bound
ary controversy. Now the Central
American states, at our invitation
are to consider return to the com
pacts Of 1907, which confederated I'd
them for many purposes and brought
them into an international grour
jurisdiction by creating a Centrs.
american Supreme Court, with =
seat at Cartago.
This court had only a BRIG
existence. The Central American
states have frequently united ane
then separated. They have old fan,
ily attachments and indulge i,
ibrusaue family quarrels. But
spirit of rapprochement is now j,
the air and the State Department
nas done the neighborly thing j
nrging the FIVE republics to rene,
h old ties.
In taking this step we are onl
= DONG what we would do were we in
society of nations operated on IN
regional basis suggested by Lor
robert Cecil. Toward such con,n,o,
sense groupings of nations this co,r
try has never expressed antaponisr
lt Is the conception Of a wor,
league implying fixed Obligations =
mutual defense and attempting i,
assemble III one body nations hav,n
few joint interests ard little has;
Tor mutual understanding that ha
been rejected.
---------------- -------------
~
New-York tribune., 1922-10-25
Coming Soon

The societies that suppress sup
posedly harmful literature will sue
ceed by and by in putting about half
OF the books published in the coun-
try into the hands of bootleggers.
New-York tribune., 1922-10-25
Lloyd George as Labor Leader

10 the Editor of The Tribune.
SIR; Lloyd George will become lead
er OF the Labor party in England. It
may not be exactly under that title
is may be Democratic Labor party, I,
or some such title, but his appeal will
be to labor. CAssANnpA
Hot Springs, Va, Oct. %, 1922.
New-York tribune., 1922-10-25
The Only Explanation

Congress is still protecting what
were infant Industries in 1883 on the
theory, apparently, that they are
now IN their second childhood.
Copyright by james j. Montaguel
New-York tribune., 1922-10-25
Eclipsed

Thompson's colt got reputation
for foolishness by crossing a river
to get drink Nowadays people
cross the ocean to get one.
New-York tribune., 1922-10-25
srgsBEa OK rng ASSOCIATED PRESS

TIE Associated PRESS IS eTcasivss eritite1 70
enc tss for tpouhieasion Of al Rrws dBvs2etses
ered.tsd 20 Il or no, ethsswtss credited IN thns
rsyey also tle iosai news os spontaneous eTisa'
All r.sais of repuelieshon q all othsr matter
kes a aaSo rfserySfs.
New-York tribune., 1922-10-25
al Aa Ty

fsy can saressss asrehsseiss advertised ts sHE
yeIauEE win c5esiuss satsty--sss II elasatisias-
t,os r,sults 10 say ease fHE THiHuAg ss&fsa.
tees to pay year nsssy tss& ssss fssesst, Ne rss
tase 10 cstbhsias. we ksfuae Sfesasfy u she
Eassrsser Gets ret
New-York tribune., 1922-10-25
WEDNESDAY. OCTOBER IS. 1912

pwred ~ Hsx ysrk Ittaans Ina. Ns~ 1ask
c@speeaiscu. rfuhiisnes aafsy. Ogden Hesd. pysss-
ds1s. nsiea Hnssts EeM. Eecrsssrys 4 y. Mazfisid.
treasurer Aadsss, Tfssuas Hsssdfrx. ist Nassau
Stres. Ne. Yerx CITY Tei.enoae. Bseknan 1850.
New-York tribune., 1922-10-25

With regard to Napoleon Bnnaparte.
captain Fitzurse believes that he was
a descendant Of julius Casar.-"Everv.
tning points that way, sir,' says the
Captain. .--"The Corsicans are more
Italian than French, ard aeide from III, ~ q
military genius of both men, lust look
at their remarkable facial and cranial
resemblance!
About six month ago Capt. Fitzurse
read Wells's "Outline of Historva9.
When he got to the place where Wells
makes some rather disparaging re-
marks concerning Caesar his HOOD
boiled When he came to what wells
SAYS of Napoleon it boi'ed oyer~Hs
teiephcned for messenger bow and
caDied Wells challenge.
FOR some reason, Wells has never
repi,ed-ls the. man afraid 2" said the
gaptaIn' puzzled. "Or does he hesi-
tate because he feels his inferioritv in
the matter Of family and thinks - -
would be presumptuous IN him to eros :
/ swords with Fitzurse z"
Some day, the Captain saws. Walt.
VIII be in this country again on a iac.
ture tour or something and
tnen we shall see what we shall seel
- 81
.or it may be-" said the CAPTAIN.
.that he is Bringing out another edi..
ton in which he retracts the insuIts ],
Weiss silence worries the Caprain,-a
And. personally, we think it is rather
cruel on the part Of Wells to continue
TO worry gentle old codger who, after
ai, asks nothing more than the onnor.
tunity OF cutting his throet
DON MARQUIS.