Evening star., 1922-05-28

In the wild mustard. making himself
all warm and panty. That's an edify-
ing sight says.
You bet says the Sweet Caps
Kid. kind of dreamy. its q great
combination he says, hot dog with
fresh mustard. That's the way we
got 'em at coney,' he says.
Sweet Caps says. you are
breaking my heart Desist,' I says.
I ask you to desist. If you don't de-
sist.' I says, I'm going to. tear your
head of by the roots and after that
I'll probably get right rough with
you. Follow me- Says, and don't
speak another word of nc description
Whatsoever :,
CHE traits aloh.Y behind me, and
his head 10 hanging low and
he mutteis to hisself. In5un file we
retraces our weary footsteps until we
comes once more to the village Of
Plentiful Valley. We goes along
Main street-1 know it's Main street
because it's the only street there is
until we comes to a small brick
building which you could tell by the
bars at the windows that II was
either the local bank or the Gala
boose. On the steps of this here
establishment stands a party almost
entirely concealed in whiskers But
on his breast i sees a German silver
badge cleaning like a full moon seen
through thick brush,
The town constable, / believe
L says to him.
THE same he says. What can
do for your
Lock US up.' / says him ana NJ
both. We're tramps,' / says, 'vaf.
rants, derelicks wandering to nna
fro 1 says. like raging lions seeking
whatsoever we might devour-and
not 1 says. having no luck. We are
dangerous characters I says. and
it's a shame to leave US at large.
Lock US up says; and feed u.s.
Nothing doing he says. Try the
next town-it's only nine miles and a
good hard road all the way
"T thought says, that you toos
hide bound oath never to shave ur..
til you'd locked up tnousano
tramps.'
Yep he says. that's SO; but
you're a little late.
"T pinched him about an hour ago.
"'Pinched who?' 1 says.
1.-THE thousandth one lie says.
Early tomorrow morning he says,
Tn going to get sealed bids and est
mates on clean shave. But arsu
he says, in celebration OF a historic
occasion, I'm giving little supper
tonight TO the regular boarders in
the jail l guess you'll have to eX-
cuse me-seems to me like / smell the
turkey dressing scorching.
And with that he goes inside and
locks the door behind him, and don't
nav no attention to us beating on the
bars. except to open an upstairs win
dow and throw a bucket of water al
US.
That's the last straw. My legs
gives way. both at once, in opposite
directions Sweet Caps he drags me
across the street and props me UP
against a building, and as he fans
me with his hat l speaks to him very
soft and faint and low -..-
Sweet Caps. says, I'm through
Leave me- l. says and make for CIV
ilizstion. And / says. If you live to
get there, come back sometime and
collect my mortal remains and bury
EN- 1 says. Fin some quiet. peaeefui
spot. No. says, don't do that neither:
Bury me- / says. ina Chinese Gene
terry. The Chinese says. puts Wit
ties on the graves of their dear de-
parteds instead of flowers. Maybe.
/ says, my ghost will walk at night
I says, pointing up Main street on
the other side. Read that sign he
says. a.
II looks and reads, and IL says on
a front window: Undertaking and
Embalming in All Its Branches
4 X
..I RALLIES little. Son boy I
says, you certainly are one
thoughtful little guy-but can't you
take a joke? / talk, about passing
away, and before / get the words out
of my pore exhausted vacant frame
you begin to pick out the fun'el= di-
rector. What's your rush. says.
'Can't.you wait for the remains
keep CAM he says, and ~ look
again. Your first look wasn't a sue
succ. 1 don't mean the undertaker's,
he says: I mean the place next door
beyond. It's a delicatessen dump lie
SAYS, containing cold grub adj ready
to beSet without tools he asys. And
what's more he says, the worthy
delicatesseher is engaged at TINS
present moment in locking up and
going away from here. In about
half an hour he says. he'll be set
ting in his happy home picking his
teeth after supper. and reading comic
Jokes to- his little son. And shortly
he says. 'whatll you and
me be doing? Well be there. in that
yittles. emporium, in the. midst OF
plenty he says. filling cur midst
with plenty of plenty. -Thats what
we'll be doing he says -
..Sweet Caps says. reSsSing
slightly :. remember who we are7 Re
the profession which we
adorn?l Would YOU L says. sink to
=. 81
"sscandalous.'. he says, with feeling.
.rm SO. hollow / could sink about
three feet without touching nothing
Death before dishonor.