The Topeka state journal., 1922-04-29

The majority-in q government of
the people, by the people, and for the
peoples q. tyrant. The beauteous
and 1rebuIous theory OF American gov
ernment is that If more people want
a certain thing done, and done in a
certain way, ipso facto that is the best
possible thing and the best possible
way
Working on this hypothesis. which
it were treason to decry, the eminent
founders of our republic doped out d
system whereby the majority is sup
posed to rule. And no matter how
sincerely or how earnestly the minor
ity wanted something which the ma
jority didn't want, the minority was
out OF luck.
And the majority, because it was
a. majority. not only impressed its will
tered. fined and Jailed the luckless
minority for daring to differ.
The only resources left to the mi
nority is to change its ideas and join
the majority In compensation for
the loss of whatever the minority
wanted, the minority was accorded
the privilege of assisting in, and par
ticipating in the enjoyment of hang
ing. drawing. quartering, filming and
jailing the remnant of the minority
which didn't have wit enough to flop.
Times Are Changing.
quartering. boiling in oil and kindred
methods of correction have gone out
of style. Even hanging is being
frowned upon by some of the govern
Jail sentences and the like for the
minority, ara still the privilege ac-
corded the majority however.
But they are not the only means
which the majority has at hand to en-
force its DEGREES.
fra faI ho Of
the men who outrageously dares to
fiaunt the majority by drinking blacl.
coffee. Americans drink coffee. with
practical unanimity- And a huge ma
jority of them like it with cream
or the restaurant substitute for cream
in it.
Probably 100 years ago a man who
didn't like cream in his coffee, if it
had been brought to the attention of
the proper aurohrities. could have
been fined and placed in jail. But
as has been mentioned. such punish
ments are being applied with less and
less severity.
But the majority, which swil1s cof-
fee with milk in it. still has a method
of enforcing its will on the hapless
minority of ~black-coffee-drin If
you don't believe. it, order q cup of
black coffee at the first restaurant
you happen TO drop into, and see what
happens to you
The waiter or waitress will look at
you with a start of astonishment,
for once out of his or her
vacuous apathy. She will look as if
you had suddenly shouted Down with
the United States? Three cheers for
crime!"
just Won't Understand.
And then a light of understanding
Will break over her features. She'll
wander away thinking to herself that
her hearing is certainly getting worse,
and considering the installation of an
under the bobs which hide
her ears and prevent her from get
ting the orders of her customers How
She had thought for a
that that funny-faced bird at
the counter said 'black coffee
She rounds up the other comestibles
which you included in your order. and
brings them to you. You may have
skipped from point to point on the
menu card and ordered a most ap-
palhngly Heterogeneous combination Of
groceries There may have been in
tricate instructions about Just how the
steak was to be done, and the length
OF time the eggs were to be boiled.
You may have ordered any number
Of tom-fool things done to your meal.
and on the average. when it arrives at
the counter Il will be just about the
way you ordered it. No one knows
Just how sha does it If a waiter or =
waitress could put on paper the sys-