davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1922-06-03
ERSKINE GUEST OF
HONOR AT CONCERT
AT COUNTRY CLUB
Employees. Members of Stude,
baker 55-Piece Band, Honor
Corporation Head.

A r. Erskine, president OF the
Studebaker corporation. was the
guest of honor at a dinner and con
cert given at the County club last
night by the 55-piece Studebaker
band. which has the reputation OF
being one of the best industrial
bands in the United States. The af-
fair was arranged by the members
OF the band as token OF appreciation
for the hearty support which Mr..
Erskine. in his capacity as head Of
the Studebaker institution. has given
TO the development of the Stude-
baker employees.
W. S. Gundeck. mana ger OF the
band, under whose supervision the
organization has made rapid strides
in recent months. presided at the
program. Following the serving OF
the dinner, he PRESENTED the mem
bers OF the band to the president Of
the corporation. each individual re-
spending as his name was called
with a statement Of the length of
time he had been connected with
the plant and the department in
" lAANAA 4AE dS tll1plONtQ-
LaudS Organization.
DR.. G. A. Lippincott. director of
cooperation of the Studebaker cor
poration. praised the ability and the
spirit Of the members Of the organ
ization. Mr.. Erskine also Landed
the musicianship and spirit of CO.
operation displayed by the band
members. He expressed his appre-
citation of the friendly attitude shown
by the employees and pointed out
that such activities as the develop
ment of the band were A manifesto
ton Of the "Studebaker spirit" OF
loyalty and coordination. He called
attention TO the fact that during the
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1922-06-03
MiSHAWAkA NEWS
LOCAL FIREHEN YIN
FROM SOUTH BEND
INDOOR BALL TEAM

In an exciting game OF indoor
baseball the Mishawaka firemen de-
feated the South Bend hremen by a
score of u TO on the Leeper park
dia mond Friday afternoon.
The lineup follows: Mishawaka-
Stubby. right field: Grove. catch;
Roggeman. pitch: Heiser, left short;
Raab, first base; kindly, center field:
Hatch. right short. Ganser. second
base. and Fetters, first base. South
Bend - Klowetter. Ollie. Zalla s.
Pete. Brakeman. Leaders. Brandy,
Thomas, Study and Sweeny.
The Mishawaka firemen will meet
the strong Foreman's club squad OF
the Mishawaka Wooden CO. at $3.50
O'Clock this afternoon on the local
diamond.
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1922-06-03
DEVELOPMENTS IN
MONEY MART SEEN
Loans Open at Five Percent
for Highest Mark in
Three Months.

NEW YORK. June Trading on
the stock exchange Friday was char
acterized by extensive and oompre-
hensive dealings mainly at higher
prices. but interest in the market Ct
self was overshadowed by interest
ing delevolments in the domestic
and foreign money markets
eau loans opened ar per cent.
the highest initial figure fin three
months relaxing when all early de-
mands had been met. 20 AZ PEI cent.
Time money hardened ~ ctionally
and accommodations again were
limited 70 short maturiues.
British exchange continued 20 fea-
ture international currensies demand
bills on London rising 20 Ar an
the pound. and the highest quotation
IN three years.
other European exchanges shared
only slightly in the strength of ster-
ling. allied bills gaining an average
OF about two points, with reaction
in the German rates Neutrals. es-
pecially the dutch rate. rallied from
Thursday's setback although private
cables reported additional with
drawals Of German financial re-
serves from those centers.
Announcement of the Republic
Midvale- Inland Steel merger evoked
little enthusiasm for independent
steels. Midvale being under constant
pressure. Crucible was steadily
bought. however and L. 5. Stee'
scored a new high for two years al
1O3. shortly after Chairman Gary
statement before a legislative com
mittee that the corporations surplus
probably amounted 10 $500. 600, 600
Oils as a group designated the
markets speculative side. Stude-
baker advanced to new high for
the year and other motors and theiI
subsidiaries rose one 10 two points.
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1922-06-03
Fail TO Get Into Store:
Thieves Rob Gasoline Tank

Thieves. falling 10 obtain entrance
into the julius Grueger grocery store,
South Bend av. and St Louis blvd
shortly before midnight Thursday
night. broke the doors of Of curb
gasoline tank and empt:ed il OF about
Is gallons OF gasoline. A fivegallon
can and a funnel found later beside
the tank gave evidence that the
thieves had been surprised in their
undertaking.
The robbery was reported 20 the
police Friday afternoon by Grueger
who stated that providers had at
tempted 10 break into his residence.
next door 20 the store. at about this
time OF night and believed the same
parties who stole the gasoline were
the ones responsible.
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1922-06-03
CRIME WAYE AGAIN
STRIKES CITY, net
LAID FOR THIEVES
Plan to Comb City for Gang
Many Naluables Taken in
Series of Thefts.


A half dozen robbery and burg
larry reports have come TO the at
tention Of the police within the past
so hours Tools, money. checks
reviewers and other merchandise
have been lost due 20 depredations OF
thieves.
Sometime during Thursday night
a pair 81 trousers belonging TO sam
SIX. 1903 Ernsperger st.. containing
Sis. in cash. a South Bend gold
watch and $15% in checks were
stolen. Investigation by the police
resulted in finding the clothing and
recovering $1,000 in checks.
Steal Army Pistols
The T.. s. Army store. Michigan
and Division SITS. was entered 10y
Burglars and a miscellaneous supply
OF autOmatics and reviewers stolen
Entrance was obtained through a
grating on. the south side OF the
building leading into basement
window. -Four As calibre automatic
pistols. one six-shot revolver Of the
same callbre. two smaller automatlcs
hog skin bag were among the DOT
An unidentified negro at o'clock
Friday morning grabbed pocket
book containing $50 IN cash while
Mrs. reese Hotes, proprietress Of a
grocery store at 704 w. Division 81.
was making change of a bill he hau
rendered her. The man had pur-
chased a dimes worth Of cheese and
presented a IS bill While making
the change the negro jerksd the
purse from the woman's hand and
ran out OF the store. turning west
on Division 81. The police have
been given a description OF the
thief.
IT. +. Fultz. rs f. Ohio ST.. com.
planned 20 the police OF the loss o
a new electric automatic drill, valued
at $50. stolen by thieves breaking
into the. office OF the new Lasaue
hotel.
Two pair Il chains We're removed
from the delivery wagon owned by
the Butzbach fruit store, 119 +
Bowman ST. A saw. claw hammer, q
Jack flame and two chisels were OBJ
tanned from a tool box belonging tC
Ed Atwood at the new w. Sibley
residence under construction at Eddy
and Wayne SITS
Use Garden Tool.
At the Six store. the trousers
thief failed TO gain entrance through
the door and used a hoe. found ly.
ing nearby the window. TO obtain the
apparel A skeleton key was found
wedged in the lock officer Diver
who made a search Of the premises
found the trousers IN a wagon box
$50 feet away from the window. A
studebaker check FOR $22.5O and
another for $50 were missing in
addition 10 the money and watch.
The recurrence of a crime wave
abated for the past several weeks
when few robberies We're brought &c
the attention of local authorities, j:
expected 20 result I'M a "drag-net" by
the police in which members of th'
day force OF the department Will als'
be called upon to participate. Sucl
a measure as prevention of crime
was broadly limited az by police Of
ffcials Friday. OF the recent robber-
les but few II any clues were obtain
ed that would lead 10 the apprehen-
sion Of the criminals.
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1922-06-03
BAND CONCERTS START
TONG

The band concert season will be
open this evening when the Dodge
Co.. band, directed by Capt. L. Eu-
gene Willes, viii render a program
on Main st, near the four corners.
This musical organization will alter
nate with the Mishawaka Wooden Co.
band under F D. Thayer. in giving
10 Mishawakans and those FROM out
lying points a Concert every Satur-
day evening throughout the summer
season
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1922-06-03
VI. II. 5. Alumni to Hold
Strawberry Festival

Plans have been completed by the
Mishawaka High school Alumni for
a strawberry festival TO be held June
at 1880 p. m, At the First NJ. +
church parlors The money raised
vii go towards defraying the ex-
penses OF the forthcoming alumni
reception. Members Of the Tri-Kap-
pas sorority viii do the serving
Musical selections viii be given by
Harry Mason and Earl Myers.
The general committee is: Logan
Emerson. chairman: Hardy Stebbins.
Edwin Sawyer. oscar Mattmiller.
William Middleton. Rex VanTilbury.
Earl Christman and Harold Holder
man.
Tickets are now on sale az the
Mishawaka Electric shop.
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1922-06-03
BUSINESS TIPS

NEW YORK, June Passenger
cars and motor trucks in United
States total beyond 1O,5OO.OO0. on
basis Of latest census by National
Automobile Chamber Of Commerce.
Auto industry is beginning 10 con
slider an output of 1900. 900 pass
enEer cars and 500 900 trucks the
normal figure for a years production.
This is the basis Of the oil trades
optimism about the future OF the
gasoline industry. which is regulat-
ed by use of motor cars. Gasoline
sales this year apparently will break
all records. probably exceeding g.
O00. 900 600 gallons for domestic and
export consumption
FAILURES
Business failures total AS fin one
week, compared with 303 in cor
responding week Of 1921.
STEEL PRICES Up.
steel prices continue upward. the
eight leading steel commodities now
averaging $500 ton. which is
S4.0S a ton higher than 10 weeks
ago. The average was S5y.11 in the
13-year period, 1901-1s13
FAVORABLE BALANCE.
Foreign trade outlook Is better.
IN April exports exceeded imports
S104 600 900. which leaves America
TO che good" a. a rate OF about
S1,250. 0oo, 600 a year. Money vaIue
Of exports is nearly as big as a YER
ago.
4ORH BREAKS RECORD.
Henry Ford had just smashed his
record by turning out 1875 cars and
trucks IN one day i'm his Detroit
plant. Since he started. Ford has
manufactured 100000 cars
MEXICAN OIL.
Mexican light oil fields are pro-
ducing about $500. 600 barrels OF
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1922-06-03
MARKET SUMMARY

the New
industrial highs 1922 made by many
Motor achieving
and exceeded previous records for the month
Sudbake estimated to be earning the OF sac snare
i q
Bulls United States Steel found plenty OF ammunition in the es
big
hollow hand" brought
a
Common standpoint but because
which 1920 S2OOO0OO0O by Judge
its preferred ddned the first of this and there little
O 0
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1922-06-03
INDIANAPOLIS LIVESTOCK

INDIANAPOLIS. June 2-HOGS-Re-
celpts 10000; market steady. Best heavies
$1,000 1000, medium mixed $40 60, com
mon choice Sl0G0N1065; bulk OF sales
$1,000 10.fI
Receipts 90; market lower
Top 81 JUH3
CALNES-Receipts 200; market strong.
Top il
CATTLE Receipts SO. market slow
and steady. Steers S5O0d850: cows and
heifers s. 5OT SIS
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1922-06-03
Ne,Cs-Times 'NewsieS' Enjoy
Feature Picture at Orpheunl

Invited 20 attend a showing Of the
feature movie. Ten Nights in a Bar
Room" by John Scharnberg. man
ager of the Orpheum theater. who
had in mind distinct moral pointed
out in the picture when he extended
his bid. more than 100 local News
Times carriers lined up at the news
paper office at $3.50 o'clock last night
and marched to the theater in a
body.
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1922-06-03
CHICAGO PRODrcF

TIER-Creamery 34iac. standards
- gc, hrsts BOA 80 &c. seconds 2Se7 2ac
EGGS-Ordinaries 211zM DC; frsts 28a
CHEESE Twins 1Sd1sIzc: Americas
1917 G19c
POULTRY Fowls 2flLc: ducks DC:
geese 14ci turkeys pc. ROSTERS 14c:
hroilers sea 40c
POIATOES-Wis round white. sacked
SL4Od ~. Mich. sacked and bulk 81 asa
l..tl- NeW Louisiana BLISS Trrurnnhe So IS
H215i Texas Bliss Triumpms 81 50d2 50.
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1922-06-03
Graduating Class
Shows Talent In
Peg O. My Heart
Annual Senior Class Play a
Real Success-Present
Play Again Tonight.

The rollicking comedy. Peg o. Ny
Heart" presented Friday evening al
the high school BY members Of the
graduating class as the annual Senior
play was a real success. With a
cast which fitted with, ease into the
situations OF the play. and unusually
artistic stage sittings. there was lit
tie that could add 10 the finished
product. The results OF carefully
and detailed coaching were evident
in the manner in which the mem
bers OF the cast handled difficult
situations
Agnes Roloff made as fippant and
pleasing a Peg as could be desired.
From the time OF her entrance with
Michael" her dog. until the close
of the play when she steps into her
place in the heart Of Jerry" she
carried the audience with her inter
pretations Of the ever changing
moods Of the, Irish girl.
Jerry" (sir Gerald Adair) was
played by Paul Fortenbacher. who
proved himself an able guardian and
lover. Some especially pleasing act
ing was done by Edmund Bierwagen
I'm the part Of Alaric, son OF Mrs.
Chichester and a cousin Of Peg. His
Interpretation OF an cratic young
Englishmap kept the audience in an
uproar. Mrs. Chichester" was
played by Ruth Hershenow. who dis
played unusual dramatic ability. and
Virginia Byers As Ethel. her daugh-
ter. added some fine bits OF work 10
the excellence of the whole produc-
ton. other members OF the cast
were Joseph Wilson as the footman
Richard Steele. as Christian Brent
George Stricken as Montgomery
Hawkes.. solicitor. and Pauline Jelli-
son, as the maid
Present Play Tonight
The heads Of the committees in
charge Of the details connected with
/ the presentation are as follows;
Stage. Mr.. Bush; stage properties
Miss Hindelang. John Slaughter and
Daniel Rich; properties and cos
tunes. Mr. Westphal, Lois Sartin
and Theresa Salinger; tickets and
publicity Miss Hindelang, Thomas
Stanfeld. Helen J. Miller. and Hitler
Krei ghbaUm; posters, Daniel Kelly
and Julia Giomi
The officers of the. class are Ed
mund Bierwagen. president; John
Bowman. vice president: Gertrude
Jaquith. secretary. Thomas stan
field. business manager and Helen
j. Miller. Interlude reporter
The new curtains for the auditor
ium stage. which are 10 be the me-
mortal of abe class OF 1922. were for
mally presented 10 the school by
Edmund Bierwagen. the class presi-
dent. J. :. MCGOWAN, principal OF
the high school. accepted them on
behalf Of the school, stating that
they would fill a long felt want.
The play will be presented again
this evening. the receipts from the
ticket sale Of both performances be
ing used as payment for the curtain
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1922-06-03

A survey OF the scout reservation
at Four Mile bridge was made Fri
day afternoon by Col. @. w. F'reyer-
muth. a, member Of the camping
committee of the south Bend coun-
ell. Some work OF Improvement at
the reservation vii be done Satur-
day.
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1922-06-03
SOUTH BEND Markets
corrected Daily By y. a Rowe. so4 a
Michigan 81. Phone Lincoln B2zsl

HAY. STRAW AND FEFD.
SEED MARKET
IIMCIH Selling, $50 Der bu
CLOhEk-Medium red, selling 81.
SUDAN GRASS-seiinz s. cwt.
AlLLEI-Commou. selling. g1Ts ewt
ALSIkE-Seliiug, SI4
mammoth red. SIS; sweet clover. ta
ALFALFA Selling, g14
SOY BEANS=GTf
SEED CORN-S2
NEW HAY-Paying. slsTIs: seIlinr
k24n 20 per ton.
OATS-Payiug. soc; selling. 5Oaeoe
cow pEA-S3da 30
Corrected Daily by the Wesisy Mill.
FLOUR and Feed Co. s20 =. Michigan "a
Phone Main ss6.l
COkN-Paylng. soc. selling Goa Toe
CLOVER SEED-PayinS, &i4. selling
flGulS
ALSlKE CLOFER-Seliing. gl4diA
ALFALbA-tNoTthern grown. S1L
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1922-06-03
Troop 1 OF abe Bow Scouts held an

Troop OF the Boy Scouts held an
ice cream social at the home of their
scout master, E. A. Peach, South
Bend and Notre Dame aves.. Thurs
day evening.
The condition OF Miss Elizabeth
Miller. OF Goshen. Ind. who submit
ted 10 an operation al the EpworIe
hospital for the removal OF a cata-
ract from the eye, is improving.
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1922-06-03
NEW YORK CURB
MART CLOSING

Aetna 13 bid.
A W. Paper. 41k-4A
Allied Packers s-I2.
ar IAght 500.
Chalmers L.
Cities Svc. Bankerh 25-E.
Cont Mfrs sis-S.
Curtis 4ia-5N
y A. Pulp 2iS-ta.
Perfection 3-4
Phil. Morris 19%-2o
Stearns Mfrs. 20-22
stand. Mfrs. 4l4-3s
lob. Prod Ex 81
Uni PIT. Shrg. 7%-S
Uni. Ret. Candy ~.
U. $. Light 11a-9-16.
L. s. ship 81
Wayne Coal 17s-2
Wright Martin 2-5.
Allen oil 1910.
Allied 2-3.
Bos. Wyo. 92-9s.
Boone liz
Carib S&-i5
Elk Basin 1t%-k
Federal ISIS.
Glenrock 1@-24.
Harvey "a
Int Pete. 267-1k.
Livingston 1&-i5
Marland of Mex. ~.
Merit 12i2-2.
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1922-06-03

Walter Arust. Chicago. was arrest
ed yesterday afternoon by Omcer
Ferge- on complaint Of Iva Miller.
al Marion ST Arnst is charged
1vitIi failure 70 pay a board bill.
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1922-06-03
CHICAGo GRAIN 49,.
CHICAGO CASH GRAIN

y ~ ~ nAft aA~h GhAlNs
WHEAT. 2 red 81 %. No hard
Sl.9llzH l2l"l. No. hard Sl19aL19Is
tORN-NO- ] yellow coz. a6lc: No.
mixed 6O1sc. No. ] white Gle
white 352 d38ltc.
BARLEl -tiJII Gac
kGE-No. .. 800
TIMOTHY 1880
CLOYER-SI2My
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1922-06-03

The Pocahontas Interurban meet
ing viii be held al Bourbon tomor-
row eve. June 3rd. instead Of June
10th. as was previously announced.
Adv. l54.
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1922-06-03

1880 600 barrels a week being pro-
duccd in United States
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1922-06-03

Hose companies from the No. .
station were called 10 the residence
of Valentine Belinski 903 DunAaui
St. at 1880 O'Clock Friday morning
A roof FIRE caused IS damage.
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1922-06-03
HInEs ANn TAIInu

tCorrected Daily b. =. W LlppmAz an
y Main -. Phone Main 2sI.l
HIDES caHskins. 1Oc
IALLOW-Rendered Sc; rough, 10ts
BEEsW AN-.1lg sc Per 10.
LARD-I2izc 10
WHEAT. CORN. OATS. Erc.
Corrected Daily b. ID. r. Morgan. So
Mills. Hydraulic Az. Phone L-5aeIl
CORN-Payiug 50c Der bu
OATS-paF luE. Sc.
AlDDLINGs-SelI $50 cwx
SEED OATs-Seliing 15c bu
BRAN Selling. $50 cWt
REE-PnvinE SOC
SCRATCH FEED-SsIIinE, 800 wi
WHLAI-N0. ] paying $3.50 bu
Corrected Daily by Brotherhssd Gro,-ry
go y. Nan - Plane N-I-BsD
IER-Paying. Soc selling. t2e
2ec duE
FRUITS AND VEGETABLES - Can,
iOTnia navel oranges. 4Oc dos
POTATOES selling. 81 = In
BAGE-Selling, s. 10.
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1922-06-03

J. J. kreuzberger. merchant tailor.
moved 10 3Q1-3e3 Dean Bldg. 6I-tf
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1922-06-03


WHY'S Overland ....-..--.-.........
Newport
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1922-06-03

Mexican light OF fields are pro-
iucing about z.50o. 600 barrels OF
Pocahontas star herald., 1922-03-03
/ ID A I TT
They Never had A Chance

A vast majority of the thousands
of Illlterates In the state who are
now being gwen an opportunity to
learn the fundamentals of a practi-
cal education say that they never
bad chance while they were young.
The Arkansas Illiteracy Commission
was created by law to meet these
requirements to give them a chance.
Their children have the advantage
of an education through the public
schools and they having been denied
these blessings in their youth, find
an open door In the Opportunity
Schools that are being provided for
them.
Pocahontas star herald., 1922-03-03
Warning Order

In the Cllancery Court OF Randolph
County, Ark.
Virgie Brown, Plaintiff.
VS..
Chester Brown, Defendant.
The Defendant, Chester Brown is
hereby warned to appear in this
court within thirty days and answer
the complaint Of the Plaintiff. Virgie
Brown.
Witness my hand and the seal of
said court this 4th day OF Feb. 1922.
e. r. Hicks. Clerk.
J. W. Meeks,
Attorney for Plaintiff. 26.4tp
Let Johnston fill your prescrip.
tions, and know they are right.
Pocahontas star herald., 1922-03-03
b Warning Order

In the Chancery court Of Randolph
county, ARK.
Oklahoma Farm Mortgage Co., and
Andrew Kingcade as trustee, plaintiff
VS..
e. W. Crismon and others, defend
ants.
The defendants, e. II. Weinrich,
Robert II. Harris, Jesse e. Harris,
Maud Harris and j. L. Smith are
hereby warned to appearin this court
within thirty days and answer the
complaint OF the plaintiffs, Oklahoma
Farm Mortgage Co., and Andrew
Kingcade as trustee.
Witness my hand and the seal Of
said court this 18th day of Feb, 1922.
e. r. Hicks, Clerk.
II. w. Harris and Schoonover & JACK
son, Solicitors for Plaintiffs. q At
Riggs d Jones have used and
rebuilt cars at exceptionally low
prices. see them before you buy.
Wanted: Men or women to take
orders for genuine guaranteed
hosiery, for men, women and chill
dreu. Eliminates darning. $4,000
a week full time, OIL 90 an hour
spare time. Experience unnecessary.
international Stocking Mills,
.25 st Norristown, Pa.
Pocahontas star herald., 1922-03-03
E. NEWTON ELLIS

II W. W NAN AAIH1HD
La,Ouer and Licensed Aucfioneer
l have paid the License required by
law to Auctioneer In Randolph Co.
Rates; IS per day, plus 2 per cent
minimum fee, $40.
Legal advice and assistance In ad-
vertising, FREE.
Pocahontas star herald., 1922-03-03

When in hurry for some
thing good for dinner, call
us, we always have some
thing new and we delight in
giving you servicea along with
Quality Groceries. Give us
a trial order that we may
demonstrate our ability to
"'Deliver the G o o d S
Pocahontas star herald., 1922-03-03

chased box of Doan's Kidney Pills
Pocahontas star herald., 1922-03-03

Il thus appears that while Frank.
Pocahontas star herald., 1922-03-03

Riggs d Jones have used and
rebuilt cars at exceptionally low
prices. zee them before you buy.
Evening star., 1922-02-17
Dopey Dan Tabs a Few Beats From
the Heart of the Nation
BY w. II. CLAGETT.

barrister was over CANNES he could
never succeed in maxim one Of them
do a tricki
The village sported a trifier. also "A
dog fancier, who would only have TO
own one a week, when he'd have 1t
jumpin' through a hat, playin' the
piano. eatin' with q knife and fork
and everything else that a bow-wow
can do!
One day. while walkin', the lawyer
seen the bug" settins by the roadway.
putin one of his doggies through all
kinds of shenannigans, and the sight
got his goat.
Coin up to the lout. however. he
said. How do you manage to do alb
that? l can't teach my dog one trick"
You gotta know morc'n the dog,
Mister Lew, or you can't learn him
nothin'"" snapped back the triher, as
he whistled for his purp.
Continuin' with the meat OF his ad-
dress. DR.. Eato got to another touchy
section of his outburst. when he felt
that a little more recall stuff would
relieve the situation.
This time he was ree-minded OF a
period durin' the early part of the
great war. before the United States
had got into the mess, when kindly
old lady, walkin' through the country
in England. happened to spy a great,
big, burly Britisher camly settin' on
stool, milkin' a COW!
Heartbroken over the news Of the
turrible losses her country had SUI
fered. and indignant that sich a
healthy lookin' specimen wa Sn't IN the
trenches she approached the milker
and said, "Why aren't you a the front,
man."
why. really, old dear" replied he.
that would be absolutely foolish, as
every drop of milk comes out OF this
end"
thank YOU. DOPEY DAN.