American Falls press. [volume] (American Falls, Idaho) 1907-1937, 1922-03-03

tale?" drawIed Heck. he barely heard
the answer:
81 guess ! don't mind, By
Heck's sympathy made him gulp
But he swallowed the lump that came
up in his throat and began bravely:
zone time the was a Teller named
Smith. Odd name. Bill. amt 1t? 'Hoss
fly Smith. they called him, cause u
was. said at he could easy shoot 9
hossfy often a hoss's ear and never
break hide on the animile. He was a
helliOn. too. One time Hosshy, he was
a-tryin' to git app'inted the chairman
o. some sort o. politics doin's, and Oh
that same day he was a-drinkin' sort
o. tOl'able heavy. They agreed &c
make him the Temporary chairman, bui
Hossfly, he didn't want that. So he
hops right up in the middle O. the meet.
in. and he hollers out and says:
"'Feller citizens he says, 4 want
to be the permanent chairman {! ain'i
a-goin' to act in the capacity Of .
burned Temporary chairman; l abso
d-n-Iutely ain'tr
His old inemy, Eb Wright, he yeIls
back and says smart-like: Set down
thar, Hossfy.' says Eb-'you're drunk
and you don't know the difference q.
tween temporary and permanent
well, they knowed Eb had it q.
comm to him right then, and they IFS.
tened fo' it. Hosshy. he addresses the
whole meetin', and this here is what
Hossfy says:
"'Feller citizens says he, 'Eh
Wright thar lows | don't know the diff.
ference atween Temporary and perma-
nent. I'll prove to you that I do know
the difference. Eb Wright says I'm
drunk. | am. That's Temporary. Eb
Wright is a ~poke-nosed idjit. That's
permanent r"
Heck finished with a lazy laugh:
"Haw. haw, hawl Hee-haw. hee-hawl"
"That story" Dale said YEARLY,
has been told on dozens Of politicians.
II has become a part of the history Of
this state"
swell. my gosh I" moaned By Heck.
He thought deeply for a moment, de-
cided that Bill Dale wouldn't laugh at
the story of Tom Jones plg-which
had drank all of a %gallon-pail of but
termilk and then gone to sleep In the
self-same pail-and went on:
Here's one. by Jake, at amt been
told on dozens O. politics men. And
every word of It is the solemn, dy!n'
death-bed truth, too.
"One time | was out In the mOun
tains a-huntin'. a-goin' along slow and
a-lOokin' TO- a squirrel. when all of a
student I hears a skeery noise right
ahead o me I'm the laurels-z-z-z-z-zl
Z-z-z-z-zi lest like that. | stops. /
stops de-e-ad still. | looks keen. Thar
was "a den O rattlers. and the very
least n "a as big around as my left
hind laigl Then l hears a turrible
growl right ahind O. me. looks keen.
Thar stands a big old she-bear with
her teeth a-shOwin', and two cross
eyed cubsl Then hears a whine at
my left. looks keen. Thar stands a
she-panther as big as a boss. with her
eyes jest a-blazin'l Then hears q
spittin' sound out to my right. l looks
keen. Thar was seven f~ull-grown wild
cats, and all of 'em had been bit by q
mad dawg! Some fix to be In? Yeuh
some fxl
"Well, | thinks to myself. Eff
shoots the rattlers, | thinks to myself
the bear and the panther and the wild
catsll git me. And eff | shoots the
bear, the panther and the wildcats
and the rattlers'll git me. And eff
shoots the panther, the wildcats anG
the rattlers and the bear'n git me
And eff | shoots the wildcats, the rat
tiers and the bear and the p~anther'll
git me. And eff don't shoot none OF
'em. they'll all git mel Some OngOdly
fix wasn't 1t. Bill? Now, how do ye
reckon | got out OF itT"
Bill Dale only smiled. ~ can't i'm
agine, By" he said.
II CANT imagine, neither" grinneC
Heck. But anyhow, I'm alive today
Well, now that ye're In a good hume.
n time more, I'll tell ye some news
hated to ruffle We up like a yale
goose a-tiyin' back'ards whilst We wal
so cussed, DANCED blue. Bill, old boy
1t amt but five days ontel Christmas
A lot o. them Nawth Ca1lner Turner
from Turner's Laurel is a-visitin' thei
kinfOlks. the Balls, and they'll ever,
dadslatted one of 'em git drunk oil
white lIghtnin' ticker To- Christmas
and-theyTl shore think O. Blacl
Adam. The Morelands amt with Y,
no more. Bill, rickOllect; only the Lit
tlefOrds is here now"
Bill Dale rose and stood there star
Ing at BY Heck with eyes so brigh
that they sparkled.
IF they came down on us looking 70
trouble, I'd be a sort of clan chief
wouldn't II" he asked. Without wait
ing for an answer: Il wouldn't min'
that, y'know. I've got a letter here
BY, that want you to put aboard tn
next southbound train that passes tn
Halfway switch. You've got about a