The New York herald., 1922-12-31
Living on Air Made Easy.

Why" he says, II got hold of farm
paper in the prison one day, an it had
two pieces into it. One told about the
in things grow: an the other one says
that plants just draws that nitrogen outa
the air. l got thinkin about it while was
breakin' stone. an then it all come to
me. That was the time l begun TO
laugh 1t was all | cid do to keep from
screechin'. But 1 KEEP still after while,
an when | got out went around preachin'
my doctrine. If we cid git air enough,
told EN-, We cid live without vittles
They said | was crazy, but 1 proved
/ wasn't. | jest stopped eatin', but /
went along strong an hearty, an | amt
tasted vittles from that day to this Then
they begun to believe it. An one day in a
city hospital they had a poor cuss that
was fetched i'm off n the street, an had to
be cut open
With this he leaned away over an
stared into my face: "Wha dye think they
found?" he whispered
"A deficit" 1 says, fer a rough guess" ="
1T sure was, he says; the feller had
ben practicin my system, an he'd gone
without food so long that his digestive ap-
paratus had plumb disappeared, jest like
the tail is gone, an the little toe is goin'.
Nature gifts red of machinery that don't do
no work" ''An' be you the same way?" I
says.
"Everybody's the same way now he
says: the human race is gittin' red of
its useless tools. the food shops an
profiteers is all bust. becus there amt
nobody that needs to eat-or kin eat
except in the 'Aesophagi.
There they be ag'in. | don't think
git them 'Sophagi.' says.
why he looked at me kinda sur
prised; the 'Sophag is the folks that
had all the money an cid afford to buy
vittles. An they KEEP on stuffin en-
selves. while the common people was
learnin to live on air that didn't cost
nothin' The sophagi is the few remain
in folk that's got oI fashioned insides
They're piped fer vitties They're Jest
the moneyed aristocrscy what with the
cussed combines they financed they put
food - hieh nobody that was worth under
seven hggers could eit 81 without steaiin'
Now they got g. an to fhsmselvss ar
welcome The resf of ~ Kin take a fsw
deep hreafhs every daf an usvef 81
dyspepsy.
That clears Hr mfsfsfY fsr ue HsE
friend G ssgs ben wauarriu faf
qu.te vhle whai a sas thaf ksn farm
business on ths ham Nas knaa Thsrr
siu't uelsslf eslin- snvfhne
An H auf ong fhe farm eas8nsss p
BE- Save Hs tbe DISH faetofsa u the
can mile caok Stove faaaa fIes o.
docks sa.Hpin rsaraa1s Ifa
changed sFeIgfhine euew maytf they u
so noW fhat ihef akerdans rhet kflsa
the gouse fhai laid tae eolaen eee Ff
q generation ~ tao GEES hste Hnt
tme sfunln emss3rrs an then theg H
have o. peter aut from intsrmarfIaer be-
Gus there uuHt ue 80 more p'sbeiau hiood
20 kesp em az o. heaith an sfreuth
We're q different race nsw Wei q
SAYS "you Cert'n'y done the JOB up brown b
lie nuckerea up hls forehead an SAYS
There's the trouble There was jest one
thing ! overlooked an that's what they
eall the directive Intelligence of capital
"HoNs that I asked him
Why he saws jest as soon as they
found cut that the people was gittin' SOS
they could live on nitrogen outa the air
they sent down to washinton an got
Congress 10 give EN- control OF the air
One day | was goin along an a policeman
stopped me an he says. 'Leme see yer air
receipt | didn't know what he meant,
but ! found out. They got law that