Atlanta tri-weekly journal. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1920-19??, 1922-12-23
THE WOMAN'S BURDEN
Dy Dorothy Dix

SAID a woman the Otner day:
| 1--WE women are always being told that we
/ must adapt ourselves to our husband S
pecuiarities, that we must KEEP our worries
to ourselves, and make home bright and hap
Ply, and that when our husbands come home
in the evening, we must be all dolled up and
meet them with glad, sweet smile.
II don't see why it is any more incum Dent
on wife to make herself over to suit her
husbands TASTE than it is for him to alter
his habits and way of thinking to please her
don't see why it is any more q wifes bust
ness to MAXI happy home than it is a hus-
bands l don't see why woman should
take any more pains to dress herself up so
she will look attractive to her husband, than
there is why he shouldn't beautify himself
so as to be easy on 1er eyes
II don't why women should have to
do all the adjusting and keepin~ the peace
and jollying, and camouflaging in matri-
mony."
There isn't any reason, my dear, except the
lronbound copper riveted reason that it is
a thing that men won't do. and therefore
women have to do it, If it is done at all. And
II it isn't done marriage goes on the rocks
1t is one of the situations described by Mr.
Cleveland when he said, "a condition. and
not theory, confrontS u.s."
Of course, marriage is partnership in
VIII h a woman invests her all Just as much
as a man does, and if the venture Fails she
Is lett more completely bankrupt than he is
because he has more outside interests to fall
back UPON than she has, and it is easier for
MIN TO make fresh start. ut is, therefore,
peculiarly an obligation of honor on man
to make his marriage success by making his
wife happy, but, curiously enough men sell
dom ever realiz this, make any effort to
pay this debt
The average man considers that his duty
to his wife consists solely in feeding, and
clothing her, and giving her comfortable
shelter, and when 4.e las done this, and
especially when he has added few fri1ls in
the way of French millinery and an automo-
bile, he feels that he has done everything
that any reasonable woman could ask and he
pats himself on the back, congratuating him.
self on being! such cd husband.
Yet if he had wife who interpreted her
marriage VOWS as he does his, he would be
hunting around for an affinity who under
stood him, and" sympathzed with him. He
wouldn't consider a; Y woman who merely
set we'll cooked food before him, good wife
He wouldn't think that a woman who took
no pains to please him, who went sloppy and
slouchy about the house, and who growled
and grumped, and snapped when she was
spoken to, was much of a home maker.
And if she told him that he cid not know
what he was talking about when he expressed
his views on a subject, and if she openly de-
rlded his opinions, and her f.yOrite funny
story was recounting to stranfe- some fool
sh mistake he had made why, then, there
would y ructions, divorce :. that fam
lily, according to whether it moved in the
circles that throws crOckery goes to law.
Every man wants his wife to give him
comprehension, and sympathy that he sell
dom even dreams of bestowing upon her. He
expects her to bear her part of the burden of
matrimony, and in addition to assume about
half of his load. Above all, he expects her
to be the little ray of sunshine in the home,
ready to make a place where the most
pessmistic dyspeptic take his glooms,
and have them charmed away.
1t is utterly unjust and unreasonable.
Theoretically; there is no more reason why
Mrs. John should have to acquire the difficult
art of walking on egss so as not to role Mr..
Johns peevish disposition, than there is why
Mr.. John should ut study Mrs. Johns pecu-
liarities so to be ~ble to- sidestep her lit
tie 1dOSyncrasies. Nor is there any reason
why Mr.. John should not read up on the sub
jects that interests rs. John, and spend the
evening regaling her on the snappy stories he
has heard during the day in order to make
himself fascinating and interesting to Her.
Neither is there ally reason why Mr.. John
should not count his CalOries, and do with
out everything he likes to eat in order to re-
tain the boysh figure that originally captur
ed Mrs. Johns fancy.
But you see Mr.. John doing any of
these things in order to make dOmesticity a
grand, sweet song for his wife? Not in a
thousand years! Mr.. John considers that
being married to woman gives him a right
to say what he pleases TO her. and that every
mans hone is his grouchery, and that if
wives don't like a three days stubble of
beard, and old pipes, and old coats, they can
lump it.
while as for making home entertaining
fer those who have 20 live in it, he no more
considers that his job than darning the
babys socks.
When you find a peaceful home in which
there are neither spats arguments, you
will find that it is he wife who steers the
talk safely past the danger points. When
you find a married couple who gets along
ha moniously together, you will find little
wife deity stroking husbands fur the right
way. When you find bright and cheerful
home you will find life wearing the smile
that won't come off.
And husband accepting it al.
:: isn't fair, but it's life 1t is the condi-
ton and not the theory of rlatrimony.
AND that's that.