Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1922-03-22


4 1t is easy to find fault says an ex-
change, and nobody wants it.
X ~
When doctors disagree, the patient
may get well or die in peace.
Funny thing about happiness-the
more of it you give the more you have.
Man, like a postage stamp, isn't
worth much unless he sticks to his job.
II Good Idea. Say We
I photographed on Decker Street,
!, Dorothy: Mother, why can't they
| make dishes like they do ice-cream
cones, so that you can eat them when
you are through the meal? Then we
wouldn't have to wash the Dishes"
Rev. Harris says that speaking Me-
thodistieahy, Secretary Hughes has
been the presiding elder in the con-
ference at Washington.
Wouldn't Europe be in a sad fix If
Columbus hadn't discovered America I?
It was bad, of course, that so many
New Workers died from drinking wood
alcohol. but it Is nevertheless a fact
that there was not much sympathy for
them personally.
An exchange says that in the cold
storage plants of the country there are
a million chickens all dressed up and
no place to go.
Some people seem to get along very
well without hands or feet, but we
} don't understand how so many are
able to get along without brainS4
Very frequently rich parents make
lpoor parents.
Stung Again
why didn't you arrest that motor
list? He was going go miles an hour"
"He said his house was afire," re-
piled the village constable.
"0h. that's different
"But / didn't recollect till tn burned
( catfish was out Of sight that he doesn't
live here"
There are no traffic cops on'ihe rad
= peiui'ioh' y
: Even colored people can ten white
lies.
J Edna Krippendorf o t Cincinnati
E swallowed a dime and then penny
! for war-tax.. An X-ray showed small
change in Edna.
: A noiseless typewriter has been in
vented but she still chews gum.--Life.
Codes Of Coin
"Girlie, I'd gladly die thousand
: deaths for you"
> Its a sweet dream, Charlie. We
could get rich on life insurance"
7 Youngstown, Ohio, is to have a
breath inspector" to assist in the en-
i forcement of the prohibition law, but
L the dispatches do not state whether
4 the new official is to be man or a
woman.
:. A reformer is getting ready TO call
! a convention of women who are OPP
I posed to short skirts. And the Poor
3 ia Transcript offers its telephone
7 booth to hold the meeting in.
4 n X n n
There will be no more kissing in
e Chicago railroad stations if the hard
hearted station masters have their
s way. Which is only one more reason
e for our already firmly cemented be
b lief that Chicago is a grand place-for
!, Chicagoans.
I Income Assessor p III. KnutaDn ex-
plains that the difference between a
y living and an income these days is the
difference between pants and trousers.
Water, Water Everywhere
Professor Tin engineering) class
What's dry-dock7
Stude--A physician who won't give
out prescriptions.-Ba Business hnvel-
opes.
Chance of a Lifetime
{. The occupants Of the parior CIR OF
2 the Limited were startled by the sab-
rupt entrance of two masked bandits
!. Throw up yer hands," commanded
the bigger of the two. Were gonna
rob all the gents and kiss all the CUES
mo, partner" demonstrated the
smaller one galiantly. "We'll rob The
gents, but wen leave the ladies alone
"Mind your own business, young
y fellow" snapped female passenger
n of uncertain age. 1.-THE big man n
e robbing this train"
:. Backward Turn Backward
S Backward, turn backward of time IL
your flight,
q Give US a maiden with skirts mot SO
tight;
] Give us girl whose charms many or
few, l&s
! Are not exposed by much peek-a- boo.
Give as a maiden, no matter what age
: Who won't use the street as a vaude-
vile stage
: Dress her in skirts the sun won't shine
: thru.
Then give US the dances Of days long
!, gone by
With plenty Of clothes and steps not
81 so high.
And turkey-trot eapers and butter
Il milk glideK
And hurdygurd twist and wiggle-tail
{ slide,
!. Then let US feast our tired optics one
4 On genuine woman as sweet as of
u yore.
Yes, time, please turn backward and
4 grant our request
= Of Gods richest blessing--but not one
undressed.
4 X =
/. Subtleties of Success
A little fattery brings advancement
: more rapidly than service for the pub
tic good, remarked the cynical courtier
e Why do you say so2
Because Walter Raleigh stepped in
e to prosperity by spreading his cloak
e on the ground for the queen TO walk
lon He never would have got anywhere
u Z - =