davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1922-02-24
lmDortant TO Mothere
ED. HoWE's FAvoRITE STORY
WeIl-Known Kansas Editor Takes
Pride in EffectuaI Way He
SqueIcned Bore.

e. w. Howe of Kansas has been
something of traveller. He made a
number of trips abroad and went
twice around the world. 1t was on
his first trip abroad that he encoun-
tered one of the sea hounds whose
chief boast is concerned in the num-
Der Of times they have crossed the At
lantic. Mr.. Howe tells the incident as
his fayorite story.
"Is this your first trip the sea
hound asked Mr. Howe on the occa-
sion of their first meeting. Mr.. Howe
admitted that it was. WELL" said
the sea hound, 1--WE crossed the Allan
tic 40 times" On the second day the
sea hound again put the question to
Mr.. Howe and again Vouchsafed the
same observation. He repeated it at
frequent intervals during the trip.
1t was on the sixth day, after the
sea hound had again spoken of the
number of his crossings, that Mr..
Howe said to him: "By the way, have
you ever been to Omaha?" The sea
hound said he never had. SWELL" re-
torted Mr.. Howe, 81 go there every
week. "-Philadelphia Public Ledger.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1922-02-24
If You Need a Medicine
You Should Have the Best

Have you ever stopped to reason why
it is that SO many products that are ex-
tensively advertised, all at once drop out
of sight and are soon forgotten? The
reason is plain-the article did not fulfill
the promises of the manufacturer. This
applies more particularly to medicine.
A medicinal preparation that has real
curative value almost sells itself, as like
an endless chain system the remedy is
recommended by those who have been
benefited, to those who are in need of it.
A prominent druggist says "Take for
example DR.. Kilmer's Swamp Root, a
preparation I have sold for many years
and never hesitate to recommend, for in
almost every case it shows excellent re-
suits, as many of my customers testify.
No other kidney remedy has SO large q
SALE"
According to sworn statements and
verified testimony of thousands who have
used the preparation, the success of DR..
Kilmer's Swamp-Root is due to the fact,
30 many people claim, that it fulflls al
most every wish in overcoming kidney,
liver and bladder ailments; corrects uri-
nary troubles and neutralizes the uric
acid which causes rheumatism.
You may receive sample bottle of
Swamp-Root by Parcels Post. Address
DR.. Kilmer & Co., Binghamton, N. Y,
and enclose ten cents; also mention this
paper. Large and medium size bottles
for sale at all drug stores. Advertisement
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1922-02-24
SHOULD BE FINISH TO THIS
Probably Some Readers Would Like to
Know Just What the Lieutenant
Colonel Said.

Private Washington Lee Johnson mad
just come up with the requirements
and, not never having had no luck
a-tall, went on sentry duty the first
night in the new camp. In the wee,
sma' hours along blew the lieutenant
colonel who had a reputation for be-
ing one hard-boiled guy.
Halt! Who goes dar?" beloved Pri-
vate Johnson.
"Oficer of the post"
There was long and painful silence
while the sentry racked his brain
for the proper thing to say. Then the
officer snarled:
.WelI why don't you say some
thing? Are you going to- leave me
standing here like this all night?'
"Nossuh," answered Private john
son in relief as flash of inspiration
came mo, indeedy. sub. At case /"
American Legion Weekly.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1922-02-24
couIdn,t control sneeze.

Margaret, age three and one-half
years and a confirmed early riser, had
repeatedly been warned to keep very
quiet when getting up in the morning,
in order not to disturb her older sister,
who was conyalescing from recent
tonsil operation. About the third morn
ing, under the new regime Of quiet
ness, as she was tip-tceing across the
bedroom to her mother, who was wait
ing in the hall, she succumbed to a
violent and uncomfortable spell of
sneezing. AS soon as the paroxysm
was over, she raised troubled blue
eyes to her mothers face and Whis-
pered, sorrowfully: ''Muzzar, I was
still, but / just couldn't make my
sneezer be STILL"
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1922-02-24
DIVULGED SECRET OF PAPA'S
Small Daughter of Story Writer Quite
Unwilling to Make Exhibition of
Family Skeleton.

A little girl, whose father is widely
known as writer of humorous stories,
was recently approached by a visitor,
who said:
st must be nice to have papa who
knows so many fine stories"
The little girl blushed and hung her
head.
aren't you proud of your papaw
the visitor asked.
"Yes," the little girl answered, ''but
think l ought to tell you something"
what is it?"
"The stories by my papa aren't
stories at all"
mot storiesY'
'sNo."
And in a deep. hoarse whisper, the
child confessed:
HE makes them all up out Of his
own head"
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1922-02-24
MANY Races Claim Boone.

From any Investigation Of the leg
ends and facts of the past it now
appears that the identity of an in
dividual even so we'll known as Daniel
Boone is not to be ascertained easily
There was apparently an English
Boone, a pure Irish one, German one,
and two or three more representing
other nationalities. 1t is just a ques..
ton of time and little more investl
cation and we may he&r of a Scandi.
navian Daniel Boone, &a9iek, an Arab.
ian, and what nos.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1922-02-24
.n 'ssas4,on roS s7 PATENTS
MORSELL 6 KEENEY
Solicitors Of Patents and Trade Marks
80 Years Continuous Practice
sos Majestic BLDG, Milwaukee. Phone CT. 1904
A Crusade.

The Old Reformer-There are lots
of things in this town that need at
tention. For instance, the young men
here spend all their spare time in
shooting craps.
The Neophyte-I don't see how
they have the heart to shoot them. I
propose that we start society for
the prevention of cruelty to craps.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1922-02-24
Had the Proof.

Pennsylvania town did not seem In
clined to accept the assertion of one
Of her girl pupils that she had been
christened in an orthodox way.
SLOW do you know you have?" asked
the teacher with smile.
Because" said the little girl, 81
have the marks on my arm. "--Milwau-
kee Sentinel. 4
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1922-02-24
WAS NOT THAT KIND OF SPIRITS

a Pullman, he fell into conversation
with a friendly travelling man, who
presently observed:
I'm in the hardware line. What's
yours?"
WELL" the minister responded with
a twinkle in his eye, II might say that
I'm in the spiritual line"
The other looked about hastily, and
laid cautioning hand upon the minis
ter's knee.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1922-02-24
Friendly Traveller Meant Well, but He
Rather Misunderstood the CIer-
gyman's Statement.

There is a certain good minister of
the gospel who does not make parade
of his piety or even mention his call
ing unnecessarily, particularly where
such an announcement might tend to
dampen the spirits of a gathering. Re
Gently, In the smoking compartment of
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1922-02-24
Iack Of confidence.

''You have no hesitancy in refusing
men who propose to YOU"
"None, whatever" said Miss Cay
enne. "They invariably show nerv-
BUSINESS that indicates very slight con-
fuence in their own suggestions"
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1922-02-24

"You know, I kind of suspected you
were keeping something under cover"
he said. Its all right with me, of
course, but you want to be little
more careful with strangers, old man.
Why, for all you knew, 1 might have
been a federal agent. "-Philadelphia
Ledger
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1922-02-24
No Chance for a chanae.

"Are you still Mrs. Ashby?" he asked
when they met, after lapse of cou-
pie Of years.
"Oh, yes" she replied. "My hus.
bands too busy to stray from the
straight and narrow, and / don't care
to because it's so common
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1922-02-24
Naturally Qualified.

"What makes you think your boy
Josh will be a good jazz performer p
Because" answered Farmer Corn
tossel, she can stand most any kind
Of noise without getting nervous"
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1922-02-24
Surely Do!

Philosopher says clothes give man
confidence. Sure. He'll go a lot of
places in clothes he wouldn't dare to
go without EN-.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1922-02-24
Details Desired.

"He pressed his cheek to hers. The
color left her cheek
"You mean he rubbed it off?
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1922-02-24

It must be a great consolation to the
widow when the insurance more than
covers the loss.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1922-02-24
True. Perhaps.

Nathaniel-"What does 'collegebred'
mean, dad?' Father-"Mcrely big
loaf, Nathaniel"
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1922-02-24
Post Office Calamity.

Pretty Girl-Any letters for met
Young Clerk-No, miss.
Pretty Girl am surprised.
Young Clerk (gallantly)-So am I I
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1922-02-24

A woman is clever when she makes
a man think he knows a great deal
more than she does.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1922-02-24

HE 9,0O0-ton United states-Au-
stralia line freighter, West Wind,
Captain Charles A. Abbott, go
days out from Brisbane, N. S. W.,
arrived in New York harbor and
tied up at the army base wharf,
foot of Fifty-ninth street, Brook
Ign, listing to port and rusty
from keelson to funnel cap. The
ship's log tells a fascinating tale
of adventure in the South Pacific.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1922-02-24

Strawberry Plants, Fruit Trees, Small Fruits,
evergreens, shrubs. roses, vines, etc Write for
prices. Big Rock Nursery. Box A, Big Rock. Ill.
The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-04-10

springtime- That IS why Father
Johns Medicine is and has been SO
successful as spring time tonic
-( ADVERTISEMENT
The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-04-10

Fortunes daring thries worthy u
her aowry'
Confined In our next issue.l
The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-04-10

rejected, bat this HAae after longer
scrutiny; the STANDARD was Lot at
its first height of perfection.
He was enormously ~ast down by
his rejection. When he got back
that night he went straight In 70
her. Il say. they're rejected me-
They won't have me-" His face was
working It's that ~ursed hear"
She slightly puckered her broTs-
-Oh-d you know, for the minute /
couldn't think what on earth You
were talking about. Were you re-
jected? Well, must s. y I'm glad
He said fatty, Why are you -
well, do Just imagine what
| you'd look like in private soldier
clothing She laughed very heart
lily again.
He turned away.
CHAPTER VI
l.
| Up in his room he began n long
letter to NoLa, pouring out to her
| all his feelings about this second
rejection. He was writing to her
and hearing from her-regularly
and frequently now. 1t was his
only vent in the opposition of these
frightful days She said that it was
hers, too.
In her letters she always men
| toned Toney. She wrote to Tony
every day, she told him; and there
were few of her letters but men,
toned parcel of some kind sent to
her husband Tony never wrote.
She once or twice said, witho II
any comment, But he is writing
| often to Mrs. Stanley and Lady
Grace Hedden and Sophia Basildon
and l hear bits of him from them
| and know he is keeping we'll. Oh
course l pretend to them that n sir
news is stale to me- l feel most
frightfuIly that the best thing every
woman can do in this frightfuI time
is to do all she can for her man out
there; and Tony's mine. When this
is all over-oh, Mako, is it ever
going to be over Things will hurt
again; but while he's out there the
old things are dead and Tory's mine
and 'Engiand's-my man for Eng
land; that is my thought; that is
my pride; that is my prayer"
And a few lines farther on, And
/ he's so splendid OF course you car
imagine how utterly splendid he IS
Lady KingWarner, his colonel's
wife. told me yesterday her husband
says he's brave beyond anything she
could imagine He said-shes giver
me his letter-+the men have picked
up from home this story about
angels at Mons and are beginning
to believe they saw them Tybal
say he hopes the angels were neal
him, because he thought he was in
hell, the particular bit he got into
and he thinks it must be good foI
The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-04-10

angels- eniarging for tLeir minds.
To know what hell il ike. As =
matter OF fact. Tybar himself Is
nearer To the superhuman than
anything | saw knocking about at
Mons His daring and his GOODNESS
and his example are a bywori in a
battalion composed. my dear. with
the solitary exception of the writer,
entirely of heroes. In sticky places
Tybar Is the most wonderful thing
| that ever happened
Cant you imagine him, Mako -
II
On the fol owing day Tidborougn,
opening its newspapers, shook
hands with itself in all its houses
shops and offices on It's own spa-
The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-04-10
ORR HEUM STAGE
ATTRACTS FOUR
TRI-CITY Girls
Three Daughters Of J. A. Shelley,
Davenport and Virginia Smith,
Rock Island, 10 Go.

Following the footsteps Of their
father and brothers to the stage,
the younger daughters OF Mr.. and
Mrs. J. A Shelley, 1913 East Four
tenth street, Berth
ella. 10, Monica, IT, and Ann, 15--
will go on the Orpheum circuit for
a six weeks tour this summer and
In September will probably make
the extended Orpheum circuit.
Miss Virginia Smith, talented
daughter of Mr.. and Mrs. William
A. Smith, 1134 Third avenue, Rock
Island, will accompany the girls AS
pianist. The girls will be chap
eroned by Mrs. Skelley. mother of
the Shelley children.
The unusual opportunity for the
Young ladies TO enter the theatrical
world was given them last week
when a tryout at the Columbia
theatre by orpheum managers was
made and they were accepted. the
six weeks tour, which will take
them through the middlewest, will
be made this summer, but the ex-
tended run, which begins in Sep
tember and covers Canada and the
western part of the United States
20 the coast has not been fully de-
cided on by the parents.
Two brothers and their wives
are also on the stage, Harold Hal"
Skelley with the Orpheum and
this week in Sacramento. Calf,
and Hugh Skelley with the Pam
tages, is in Portland, Ore, this
week Mr.. Shelley. the father, was
formerly on the stage
Open In Columbia.
The girls will begin their act at
the Columbia theatre, the date
however. undecided. The act
will open with dance by the three
girls, accompanied at the niana
BY Miss Smith. There will be
solo dance by Ann, and duet num-
Der by Monica and Berthella, pi-
ano solo by Virginia Smith, and
musical number in which Virginia
will play the piano, Berthella the.
violin and Monica the cello. The
act closes with a popular dance
number.
All four girls studied dancing
with Miss Margaret Schnitzer of
Rock Island, doing exceptional toe
work. Miss Smith is Miss Schnil-
Ter's accompanist
The Shelley children will be sent
TO the Alviue school in New York,
following the contemplated tours
where they will receive theatrical
finish. The Alvine school is known
nationally and has turned out
many of the best known actresses.
The girls have appeared in local
talents, have given programs at
various places including the Fort
Armstrong theatre, and have also
appeared in Peoria. Ill.
The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-04-10

Extraordinary the intensity of his
searching. suspicious stare. Hard,
stupid old man, Sabre thought.
Dash 1t. does he suppose I've got
designs on the girl?" He would
have returned an impatient answer
had he not been SO anxious on the
Perches' behalf. Instead he said
pleasantly, "Of course she's not. Mr..
Bright Mrs. Perch is a very Old
friend of mine and a very simple
and kind old lady. Therell be only
herself for Effie to meet. Aud
she'll make a daughter of her"
Nothing of the penetration abate i
from the deep set eyes, no- came
any expression of thanks from the
stern, pursed mouth. "I'll take ny
girl over and see for myself, Mr..
Sabre"
Surely, stupid old man. However,
poor young Perchi Poor old Mrs.
Percht The very thing, if only il
would come of.
1t came off. Sabre went up &c
Puncher's Farm on the evening OF
the day Mr.. Bright, ito see for him
SELF" had called with Effie. Young
Perch greeted him delightedly IN
the doorway and clasped his hand
in gratitude, TITS all right It's
fixed. She's coming. 1 could see
she took to the girl from the start.
BY Jove, you can't think how
grateful / am to you, Sabre"
CHAPTER V.
This frightful war, On his brain
like a weight On his heart like a
pressing hand.
Blowing about the streets, in the
newspapers and at meetings, in the
mouths of many, and in the eyes of
most, was the new popular ques-
ton, Why aren't you in khaki 81
The subject of age. always shroud-
ed in seemly and decorous mod
esty, was suddenly ripped out of it's
prudish coverings.
That was in the third month OF
the war But by June, 1915, the
position on these little points had
hardened. In June, why aren't
you in khaki" was blowing about
the streets Certain men avoided
one another. And in June young
Harold Joined up. Sabre greeted
the news with very great warmth.
by Jove, I'm glad. Well done,
Harold That's splendid. Jolly
good luck to you"
Later in the morning Twyning
came in. His air struck Sabre as
being deliberately aggressive.
We'll, Harold's gone" he said.
Yes, I'm jolly glad for the boys
sake. l was just congratulating
him. l think it's splendid of him, $
Twyning breathed heavily
through his nose Splendid? Huh.
Well. he's gone now and 1 hope
you're satisfied"
: Sabre turned in his chair and
questioned Twyning with puckered
brows. Satisfied? What on earth
do you mean-satisfied ?''
You always thought he ought TO
go. My boy saw it"
You're talking nonsense. I've
never so much as mentioned the
subject to Harold"
Twyning always retracted when
Sabre showed signs of becoming
reused. "Ah, well, what does it mat
ter? He's gone now. You wait till
you've got son, then you'll think
differently. perhaps. You don't
know what my boy means to me.
The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-04-10

furious anger was about to burst
when there had suddenly come tC
its control the thought, These two
aren't getting at you for any love
of England, for any patriotic rea-
son. Theirs is another reason" He
said very slowly, Il never told you
perhaps 1 ought to have told you at
the time, that l was refuse for the
army some while ago"
Twyning spun around from the
bookcase. Really? By Jove, and you
look fit enough, too, old man. Fancy
Jolly sporting of you. Fancy-Oh-
l say, old man, do let's have look
at your paper if you've got it on
you"
Sabre was at his door. What pa
PERI"
Your rejection paper, old man
I've never seen one"
Il haven't got one"
Not got one! You must have, old
man"
We'll, 1 haven't. I was seen pri-
vately. I'm rather friendly with
them up at the barracks"
oh, yes, of course. Wonder they
didn't give you a paper, though"
Sabre paused on the threshold.
He perfectly well understood the
villainous implication. Vile. intol-
cradle! But of what service to take
it up?
II.
In August, the anniversary month
of the war, he again offered him
self for enlistment and was again
The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-04-10

elaI and most glorious '. Cord
Tyhar
Tybar's V c. was the first thing
Sabre spoke Of TO Mona when. a
fortnight later, she came down and
be went up TO her at Sorthrepps in
the afternoon. It's brilliant gal
lanfry. rendered so vivid to him
by the intimacy with which ne
could see that thrice attractive fig
ure engaged in its performance,
stirred him most deeply. He had
by heart every line of its Official
record in the restrained language
, Of the Garette.
The left flank of the posi-
| ton was insecure, and the post
when taken over, was prepared for
The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-04-10

defense When the battalion
was suffering very heavy casualties
from a TTmm. field gun nj yery
close range. Captain Lord Tyhar
rushed forward under intense ma
chine gun Gre and succeeded N
capturing the gun sfngie-hanied
after killing the entire cres
Later. when repeated attacks de-
veloped. he controlled the defense
al the point threatened. giving per
sonai assistance with revolver and
bombs !. Single-handed he re-
pulsed one bombing assault
It was entirely owing OF the gallant
conduct of this officer that the sit
uation was relieved
Oh. rare and splendid spirit
The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-04-10
Gi91l ASMHuTCEslNSoNl

! He's everything in the world to me
| got him in here so as to have him
with me and new this cursed wars
taken him. You don't know what
he is, my boy Harold He's a better
that. He's good Christian boy
He's never had a bad thought or
said bad word"
Not very long after this incident
occurred another incident. In its
obvious aspect it was also related
TO the Why aren't you in khaki %
question; Sabre apprehended in il
a different bearing.
One morning he stepped sudden
~ from his own room into Mr.. For
tunes in quest of a reference
Twyning and Mr.. Fortune were
seated together in deep converse
ton. They were very otter thus
seated, Sabre had noticed. At his
entry their conversation abruptly
ceased; and this also was not new
Sabre went across to the filing
cabinet without speaking.
Mr.. Fortune cleared his throat
"Ah, Sabre. We were just saying
what very deeply unfortunate
thing it is that none of us orin-
cipals are of an age to do the righi
thing by the firm by joining the
army"
Yes, it's a pity" Sabre said.
I'm glad you agree, | knew you
would. For myself, of course, In
out of the question. Twyning here
is getting on for 40 and of course
he's given his son to the war. You
of course, you're married, too
and there we are! 1t does, as you
say, seem a great pity"
Sabre spoke very slowly. Mos
The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-04-10
PUBLIC DINNER FOR
SENIOR SEMPAIO rs
SET FOR APRIL Is

Plans for the reception of Senior
Sebastian Sempaio, Brazilian con-
sui and commercial attache, who
with Frank A. Harrison of the de-
partment of state will visit Rock
Island Tuesday, April Is, include
dollar dinner to be given in the
Rock Island club under the aus
pices of the Rock Island Chamber
OF Commerce.
Rotary, Exchange and Kiwanis
club members will attend in a
body. and business men of the
community in general will partici-
pate.
The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-04-10
PALMER TO SPEAK
AT ROTARY MEET

DR.. B. ]. Palmer. head Of the
Palmer Chiropraetic school. nag-
export. viii address the Rotary
club at the noon luncheon tcmor-
row. He has been requested % re-
late some of his recent experiences
abroad.
The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-04-10
To the Voters of
Rock Island County

AS a resident of Rock
Island County for the
past 81 years, a tax
payer and citizen, l
kindly solicit your sup
port at the Primaries,
April II, for County
Treasurer on the Re-
publican Ticket. If nom
mated and elected, will
enter Office unpledged
or obligated to any fac
ton or individual, but
will devote my entire
energy and ability to
giving taxpayers of the
County efficient service,
without fear or favor.
Upon this platform and
my business record for
the past twenty years I
ask your consideration
and assistance for which
I thank you.
HENRY C. LUCHMANN