The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1922-11-02
ON SECOND THOUGHT
BIZ JAY n HOUSE.
(Fron PhiIadslphia Public Lsdeasl


paper all TO yourself, my dear?
Mr.. Bolingbroke: Here it is for
you, my dear; I have finished it.
/ Mrs. B.: 1 humbly thank you for
giving it to me when you have done
with it. I hate stale news. Is there
anything in the paper, for cannot be
at the trouble of hunting it?
Mr.. b.: Yes, my dear; there are
the marriages of two of our friends
Mr.. B.: Your friend. the widow
Nettleby. to her cousin, John Nettleby.
Mrs. B.: Mrs. Nettleby? Deart
Mr.. B.: Because you asked me, my
dear.
Mrs. B.: oh, but I, is a hundred
times pleasanter to read the para
pleasure of the surprise by being told.
Well, whose was the other marriage?
Mr.. B.: Oh, my dear. will not tell
you; I will leave you the pleasure of
the surprise.
Mrs. B.: But you see, I cannot find
it. How provoking you are. my dearl
Do pray tell me.
Mr.. B.: Our friend. Mr.. CRANKY. !
Why did you not make me guess? I
should have guessed hiRp directly.
But why do you call him our friend?
am sure he is no friend of mine, nor
never was / took an aversion to him,
as you remember, the very first day
saw him. I am sure he is no friend
of mine.
Mr.. B.: am sorry for it. my dear;
but I hope you will go and see Mrs.
Mrs. B.: Not I, indeed, my dear.
Who was she?
Mr.. B.: Miss Cooke.
Mrs. B.: Cooke? But there are so
many Cookies. Can't you distinguish
her in any way? Has she no Chris
tan name?
Mr. b: Emma, I think Yes, Emma
NJ. -
not be my friend. Emma Cooke; for
I am sure she was cut out for an old
maid.
Mr.. B.: This lady seems to be cut
out for good wife.
Mrs. B.: Maybe so. I am sure III
never go to see her. Pray, my dear,
how came you to see so much of her?
y Mr.. B.: I have seen very little of
her, my dear L only saw her two or
three times before she was married.
Mrs B.: Then, my dear, how could
you decide that she was cut out for
a good wife? am sure you could
not judge by seeing her only two or
three times, and before she was mar
ried.
Mr.. B: Indeed. my love, that is a
very just obserXation.
Mrs. B.: I understand that compli-
ment perfectly. and thank you for it,
my dear. must own 1 can bear any
thing better than irony.
Mr.. B.: Irony. my dear, I was >per-
fectly in earnest.
Mrs. B.: Yes. yes; in earnest; SO I
apprehension, butt my feelings are
quick enough; L comprehend, too well.
Yes, it is impossible to judge of
woman before marriage to guess
what sort of wife she will make. II
presume you speak from experience;
you have been disappointed yourself
and repent your choice.
Mr.. B.: My dear, what did I say that
was like this? Upon my word. I
meant no such thing. L really was
not thinking of you in the least.
Mrs. B.: No, you never think of me
now. can easily believe you were |
not thinking of me in the least.
Mr.. B.: But I said that only to prove |
to you that I could not be thinking |
ill of you. my dear.
Mrs. B.: But I would rather you
thought ill Of me than that you should
not think of me at all.
Mr.. B.: Well, my dear. will even |
think i'll of you, if that will please
you.
Mrs. B: Do you laugh at me? When
it comes to this I am wretched, in |
deed. Never man laughed at the |
woman he loved. AS long as you had
the slightest remains of love for me |
you could not make me an object of
derision; ridicule and love are in
compatible, absolutely incompatible. /
Well, 1 have done my best, my very |
best, to make you happy, but in vain.
I see 1 am not cut out to be a good |
wife. Happy. happy Mrs. CRANKY!
Mr.. B.: Happy hope sincerely that
she will be with my friend; but my |
happiness must depend upon you, my
love; SO, for my sake, if not for your
own, be composed and do not torment
with such fancies-
Mrs. B.: do wonder whether this
Mrs. CRANKY really is that Miss Emma /
Cooke. I'll go and see her directly; |
see her must.
Mr.. B.: I am heartily glad of it, my
dear, for I am sure a visit to his wife |.
pleasure.
Mrs. B.: promise you, my dear, I
do not go to give him pleasure, or
you. either, but to crafty my own
curiosity.
Editors Notes: As the reader has
already suspected, the Bolingbrokes
to the early Victorian era. |
up-to-date little lady she would have
shot Mr.. Bolingbroke Immediately fol-
lowing his complimentary reference to
Miss Cooke.
Immediately thereafter neighbors
would have summoned the police and
reporters would have appeared on the
scene. After some delay 1t is proba-
bic Mrs. Bolingbroke would have been
on a charge of murder and
permitted to be at liberty on her own
recognizaEce. The papers would have
been full of the ragedy; lady report
ers would have been detailed to sob
upon the shoulders of the public. The
character of the dead man would have
been blackened.
After a time, Mrs. Bolingbroke
would have been subjected to the in
dignity of a trial in court With the
smart lawyers for the defense and the
newspapers playing upon its SYM
pathies, the community would have
gone on an emotional drunk. That
deadly intoxicant, mush. would have
run knee deep in the streets.