Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1922-07-20
SEEN ON THE SIDE
BY HENRY EDWARD WARNER
PNNErcha.


BY HENRY EDWARD WARNER
ProEreas.
And how Is my daughter getting on with
he plano. Professor" asked Mrs. Sniggle-
ritz
"Spiendidly." said Herr Biit1endoerrfer.
She haf progress so dot now she blay mid
tut schticking ouid her tongue, and next week
he make moosic NIT two more fingers.
shucksI
Say. Doc. didja hear about Mrs Smifkins
giving Bill the dickens when she caught him
'ith his typewriter on his 1ap?"
Nav! Yuh don't say"
Yeah He vas cieanin' 1t with her tooth
rush"
Solomon.
The Wiscst Man who Ever Lived had a
ouple hundred wives. He was wise. because
n that crowd he could always And at least
me who had nothing to complain OF at the
moment.
Reduced to simplicity.
Name two Of the most important events In
III history" commanded the examination
heet in tho history class
To which the candid student In the mrs,
ow replied:
when l Was born. and when am going
o die"
The Tragedy.
wv" by two they were hustied on the Ark
>"ah couldn't Acc: II was terribly dark!
Md two got on when Noah wasn't looking
Tw" got by with an accidental booking
w" were saved-what pnin the world hast
Md one wrote scenarios and one wrote jazz!
Too Serious.
s: Why is il that you never write any
ok"s about the mother-in-iaw?
A Readerettc
because We have one. Persons who make
light NJ the neother-in-law are Iil-intormed
m"thsr-in-law. Readerette, is no joke,
I've rot it, exclaimed Benson
III. or thcm?" inquired SmiH
n" sp"ohns." protested Renson. You
'n"w this sea serpent they talk 50 much about
very resort season? I've been trying TO fig
ire him out. Ire got him He's the same one
hat was in the Garden Of Eden"
Mabel didja notice that bis mole right In
h" middl"of MyrtIes back?"
Yeah, seen ut"
Makes her look terrible over-drcsscd. don't
I -"
Etiquette Hints.
II is considered very improper for a mother
% ask her daughter where shes going might
Pale people should stay out late and lose
'"ep; II helps get rid OF surplus population.
Smartncss Is always reflected In extremes
false cyeiashes arestrictly the vogue
Up With the Times
ny u. o. II.
II should he understood. OF course, that the
President and twentr-eight Governors cannot
iis the amount OF coal the country needs
Especially when one OF the twenty-eisht,
Governor Morrison. wants to DO his part OF
he digging In the Presidents ribs
Says correspondent: "Fresident Obreccn
VIII adopt mailed 'st' policy in dealing with
,chels." Sounds more reasonable, at any rate
ng the one-armed Mexican chief a. two
listed man.
With the progressive Republicans split abou,
I've ways. the Nebraska "olt guard" was abI.
y" run second This simply does not seem to
,e regular" year.
No doubt there ways OF computing time.
= which know considerably less tban
q
when after sixteen weeks Of a strik. soma
'ody ups and says the end Ia no nearer than
was In the beginning
Soviet spokesman ara said to have denied
hat Ienine IL dead But we wou!a like IN
sk em one question: Hasn't he been?
Echoes From Down Home
Concord is the latest North Carolina town
~ vote hig bond issue for schools Dema-
:oEu"s may rave. hut the old state goes right
IN clinEng to the belief that its boys and
Urls are worth all the money It can put into
hem.-Grcensboro News.
We have stressed industrial neglect time
nd again. and here Ia one more time we take
he opportunity to do IT, large portion OF
'ur bean. cucumber and other vegetable pro-
'uction Eote TO waste every season known
% the calendar. Some day, maybe We Will
wake Wilmington Star
Mr.. Hoover says hs would like to hear from
ONE Of the consumers who havs heen over
harGed for coal How can he fan to- with all
nc hoIler they're putting up?-Ashevillc Cit-
an.
t.