The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-08-16

AOAAASeSAOSA 49,
Fidence.
IN Michigan three men kidnapped young
married woman and dew away with her In m
airplane. That is what We should call flying
In the face Of Providence.
THERE are number Of persons for whom
We have little fondness though We seldom
grow violent in letting the fact be known.
But for the bird who SWITCHES the Chicago
daily papers before We get . chance to look
at 'em our aversion 10 = soul-scorching thing
and We can lick him on q dime!
PROBABLY.
Dear Mac: This was in The Argus the other
ION information from the west end
Of the city where Green operated. Ofhcer
Kirsch arrested him. last night
fig. c 6AETAON ETAOIN ETAO"
Probably the aforementioned information
in code-0r somethfng-not!
MRS. ICIE NJ BEERS Asks Heart Balm"
according to headline in the Peoria Star.
Somebody has been stealing the nectar from
Ieis's lips and gosh! how he must have dread
ed it.
TOTHER day the Young Rufian descended
into the depths of degradation. While visit
ing at the adjacent camp he tore up some
papers and as punishment one Of the young
men caught and kissed him. Ordinary bumps
and hurts do not feaxe him but the unwelcome
kiss opened the tear ducts and kept them open
for half An hour. What hurt your feelings most
when you were kid!
Wen Have to write Another Paras;iapA About
This.
From RIGS Pillar, Chicago Post.l
THE editorial writer, the colyum conductor
and two cartoonists Of the Chicago Tribune
h>vv noA
velt's big stick" in the rail and mine strikes.
Which reminds US of~the unfortunate gentle
men who tried to bend the bow of Ulysses
Mac, in the R l. Argus.
Ulysses, Mac! To 10, Warren seems rather
a second Penelope. putting OF this and that
thread. until such time a. IN Ulysses shall re-
turn to the throne Of Ithaca
THE Penelope comparison is apt Rio, but
what We were getting at Is something else
again. We were comparing Warren not to
Ulysses but to theS"unfprtunate gentleman" lit
should have been singular). You see we sort
OF figure that. just az none save Ulysses could
bend his bow. 20 none save T. h. can swing
his big stick. (All of which explanation il
unethical on the part Of = colyumist) =
The Haven Of Those Who Slice Their Shots.
From the Peory Star,l
-. So he enlisted the cooperation OF
Dick Bradley and this afternoon they
rounded up tho children Of Neighborhood
House, the Guardian Angel orphanage.
Home for tee Friendless. etc. -,
ANYWAY, the difference befween Alexander
the Great and Gamaliel the Wait IL perfectly
clear. Gamaliel isn't signing for any more
, worlds to conquer.
Speaking Of Colyuns.
| from Editor L Publisherl
| "COLYuM" is word SO comparatively.
| new that the very latest six-cylin-
dered dictionaries do not contain It; but
"colyuIping' 10 an old game. nevesth>-
less. Paraxraphers have been grinding
out their clever comments for long
| time.
| Surely a tablet of Egyptian hero
eiyphics, provided 1t be humorous .and.
for all most OF US know. some Of EN-
arelis fully entitled to be called a COL
| yum. And, to bring the matter I'M to ana
including the flscal> year Of 1872, even
| those papers which today do not carry
an omcial coumnist are wont to run
! some breezy remarks concerning the A.
| fairs Of the day under the editorials.
This is probably done In the hope that
some readers. IN search Of the daily
paragraphs that make life worth living
and there 10 No Asnd like . connrnned
! coiyum hend-may accidentally read the
| Asv uaesseI Woel6 Inc 6eQ S0x and the
Braves finish in the league races this
| year, the fact remains that the Boston
Gazette was one OF the ffst American
papers to grant colyum to its readers,
Under the somcwhat unjaxzy title Of
The Bower OF Sentiment and Mirthr.
the literary ancestor Of Eugene Field.
+. p. A., Don Marquis. ct a. endeayored
70 wallop his readers In the funnybone.
HIS name Is unknown; he signed himself
| neither BY initial nor nom de plume. -
Which Is pity, for he swung q wick
ca pen. Here IL . mean quatrain from
his Bower" from the Gasette Of April
%, 1soD:<
Observe fair Celia, an IN an
Mild, beautiful and young.
It's true; but then her mouths 20 small
1t cannot hold her tongue"
Which might get the much desired ton
the colyum even In these dayp-
Morrie Rysdnd.
MORRE ussd to be (perhsps stfll Il, :
star contrib to !. ?. As colyum. Hes eood Is
Tar - he eoes but he ought TO come ont "a
examine ne places where the west beEius@
then when he had ocoasion to saumsrsss the
u ~ g she Gaasttsb unknown colyum,
T., ct H." = =
THE coal strike has bsen ended .aa part.
~ understand
n,. Inc /, e.. 80 - permits ~ resumption II
Hat ths PAT dat permits the reduction Of
slssl