Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1922-09-27

Hickory, Diekory, Dock.
The mouse ran up the clock.
But down 1t ran when she screamed
Twas shocking,
For you see the clock
Twas on her stocking.
REFLECTION AFTER A KISS
The Creator realized how few beau
tiful girls there were and created dark
ness.
LEFT 1T OUTSIDE
Now, this big fish
Why did you let him get away?
We really didn't have room for him
in the boat.
The liberal minded man is willing
to keep half the Ten Commandments
and let his wife keep the other half.
r. 4 Y
Sister-Has the baby had the meas
les yet?
Mr.. Newdad-Don't speak so loud.
Whenever he hears anything mention
ed, he hasn't got he cries until he gets
it.
n r. - "
FACE OF LIFE
The bird that was caught stealing a
sidecar outfit 'just for lark" has
been Gagged. The clark" didn't even
attend his trial-she couldn't "Take-
Off from her work at the laundry.
A rolling motorcycle gathers no
crowd.
After the hardest day at the office
the ordinary man needs only thirty
minutes at home to brag himself into
good humor.
+ Are we human because we hate the
umpire-or do we hate the umpire
because we are human?
n Y n X
Still, if we are unable to get coal
this winter, it will save us the trouble
of kicking over the price.
HE WAS
Impatient Diner-Who's waiting at
this table?
Passing Waitress-You are.
= y ~
He-Stunning combination.
She-That's not a combination, it's
AN evening gown.
father can't wear mothers nightgown
and fool it.
SOMEBODY'S MISS FORTUNE
"And when you told him | was mar
ried," said the girl who had Tilted him,
did he seem to be sorry?"
Eyes" replied the other, che said he
was very sorry-altho he didn't know
the man personally"
OUT OF THE FRYING PAN
Has you second wife a more even
temper than your first?
More even? No, even more.
IS THIS your
When ice cream grows on Macaroni
trees,
When Sahara's sand grow muddy,
When cats and dogs wear B. v. Dees,
That's the time / like to study.
Neighbors like relatives, we can't
choose, but thank Providence, we can
still hand pick our friends.
American end: in.I CAN"
Nothing seems to please loafer so
much as an opportunity to bother a
man who is busy.
A Question That Motorcycling Par
ents Don't Have to Worry About
Nav, are we rich?
Mol
Then, why do we own an automobile
4 \
Have you even met a man so poor
that he was unwilling to share his
TNNx rfv
Kitty:-Isn't it a most fortunate
thing?
Ethel-What?
Kitty-That people can't read the
kisses that have been printed upon
girls lips.
Three strikes are out, in baseball.
1t is said that in golf three strikes are
outlandish.
Sidewalk Critics Put Ladies
Fair in Proper Niche
The sidewalk critics were assembled
on the Garner.
"She is passing fair" murmured
they as junoesque creature, blonde
as a hand-maiden of Zeus. fioated by
on pavements all too earthly.
Here, thought the reporter, "are
gentlemen Of rare good Judgment"
And he fingered to approve.
Came maid as fair as an hour
ravishing. Her clothing was dark and
modest-Oh, jewel so rarei The re-
porter took the count,
"a fiat tire, murmured ont Of the
critics lanquidly.
fYea. very lemon" agreed his col
league in tired voice.
The reporter CAPPED In amazement.
A poet jeered; an artist laughted TO
scorn-a heavenly vision called elem
on" by clods.
"But, sirs," the reporter remon-
strated. (He was good Judge of
women as was his father before hfn1)
The critics looked their disgust.
Hes Just of the hay trail" one re-
marked in languid sympathy. (He was
speaking of the reporter.)
"Yes," agreed his companion with
equal languor. "sThe DANES old fash
toned" and with graceful gesture ne
indicated the edge of white beneath
her dark and modest skirt.
And To- what he said was true. The
goddess wore q petticoat