New Britain herald., 1922-07-27
What Harry Underwood Asked Madge
 to Do to Aid Him.


 The Idea ot Harry Underwood act Ing like a father to any girl was so ludicrous that l nearly choked in the effort 10 suppress a laugh, and stole q look at him 10 see II by any possi hility he expected mo 10 take serious ly the balderdash he had been utter ing But as caught his eyes he exploded into a loud laugh which sent the resentful blush to my cheeks,
 Very nearly put one over on you that time Lady Fair Z" he chucklel, For second or two had you srog- gy. HoweVer"-his voice lost its mirth-"dont get me wrong on this Yes, I expect to use them some more, But the old pop-gun father deserves anything that can be done to him, in- cluding a nice boiling oil bath, Every dollar he has made cheating the gov ernment in the war But l haven't been tritling with the ey-r-r-l's affec- tions. Remember that. with these he touched the snowy white mus tachios and Van Dyke beard,-"Im grandfather"
 l smothered the retort on my lips to the effect that he had carefully ex- plained to the romantic Miss Helen an appealing reason for his white whiskers. II was evident that he honestly acquitted himself of philan- dering with the young daughter of his host. But l remembered a remark of Dicky's to the effect that "old Harry would do the impressive to depart ment store lay figure if there were no other feminine person on his horizon," and realized the futility of making him see any other viewpoint but his own distorted and fantastic one,
 Besides, l told myself grossly, it was none Of my business anyway And I appeased my conscience with the thought that the romantic Miss Helen would have thu opportunity to get over her infatuation if it's object were really going away.
 \ Roundabout Route.
 Where do you wish me to take you?" I asked, glad of chance to switch the subject. TO the railroad station?"
 Not the first thing" he returned, dropping at once into the matter of- fact tone I had adopted. l guessed that he was glad to avoid any further discussion of Miss Helen. "I want to go to the Smythe- Hopkins house first and throw few things together would you mind waiting for me there l won't be gone more than a few min utes, and-I can put a steamer trunk in the tonneau, cant l %
 "Of course.'' said quietly, although did not exactly relish the prospect of driving through the streets of Southampton with a trunk in the tonneau, and so striking and bizarre a figure as the pseudo Don Ramon Almirez sitting beside me
 T know it's a miserable thing to ask you to do," he said contritely, but I can't afford to let any of those dubs get a line on where I'm going. 1 I'm afraid I'll have to trouble you an awful lot, but your father seems to think it necessary. don't want to take the train from this station. Could < you get me to the Shelter Island ferry { to Greenpoint without attracting too . much attention?
 I considered his question a minute. | Then l answered slowly:
 Yes, there is a wood road from | Southampton to Sag Harbor, and l can drive you around the back streets there to North Haven, and from there f to Shelter Island, Many of the sum- mer people have gone anyway
 Dr. Petit Passes By.
 "Yes, I know" he returned with a sardonic grin. My hosts would have | been gone long ago only I persuaded | them that the real aristocracy fingered | late in the autumn. Well, that's set tied then. But what about this saw bones you are supposed to send back i to the palpitating MT. Smythe- Hop ! kins? I suppose it's dear old Herbie | Petit. If so, you don't catch this child near the telephone, It's my private belief that bird could spot me ever it without my uttering a word.'
 I involuntarily broke my rule of [ keeping my eyes on the road ahead | and gave him a quick, astonished | glance.
 There's nothing clairvoyant about .