Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1922-11-15

eoeYs,e.sr 1921. az E0eAa ALA, lose.
--------------------------'------ -.
She Sure Am
Neither Sambo nor Rastus could
read the time of day-or ANYTHING
else-but Sambo had a nice big Inger-
soil which he exhibited with a great
air of superiority.
What time am it," said Rastus.
Sambo hesitated and then extended
the timepiece saying: "Dar she ann
Rastus lock at it carefully and said:
''Dam it she amt"
X X
Get the Peanuts
Grandma, are you with the cir
cus?"
"Of course not, my dear. Why?"
II heard pa say that when you came
to visit us we'd have, an elephant on
our hands,"
Omit Flowers
She-Fashion's dead this winter.
He-Yes, I've noticed you're wear
ing your hose at half mast.
T. n
1.-THE evening wore on" continued
the man who was telling the story.
Excuse me-" interrupted the would
be wit. But can you tell us what the
evening wore on that occasion 2"
Il don't know as it is important"
must know, believe that it was the
close of summer day"
{ 4 X 4
Prof. lin engineering clsas What
is a drydock?
I Stude lin rear)-A physician who
won't give out prescriptions.
n x X
my son." said the father who was
somewhat addicted to moralizing, ''this
is the age Of specialities and Special
lists. Is there anything you can dc
better than anyone else in the world -
tYeth, thir," lisped the small boy
Il can read my own writing.
lrate Golfer: you must take your
children away from here, madam; this
is no place for them"
Mother: Now don't you worry
they can't ear nothin' new-their fla.
Their was sergeant-major, e was!"
Doctor said the shrewd-lookinq
man, chow many feet of gas does il
take to kin person."
That's rahter queer question" re-
piled the doctor "Why do you wish
to know?
well, you see, one of the guests
at my hotel used enough of it to kill
himself, and | want to send in a pro-
per bill to his executors"
| She-"Why do you always look
down when there is young lady
ahead of us?"
He-"My college education has caus.
ed me to observe all places of interest
\ T.
| Mr.. MacTavish attended q christen-
ing where the hospitality of the host
knew no bounds except the several ca.
pacities of the guests. In the midst
of the celebration Mr.. MacTavish rose
up and made the rounds of the CON-
pany, bidding each profound fare
we'll
But, Sandy, man. objected the
host, "ye're not goin' yet, with the
evenni' just started?"
NAY" said the prudent MacTav-
ish, "I'm mo- goin' yet. But I'm tellin'
ye good night while know We ALL"
The youth seated himself in the
dentists chair. He wore a wonderful
striped silk shirt and an even more
wonderful check suit. He had the
vacant stare that so often goes with
both.
II am afraid to give him gas" the
dentist said to his assistant.
"Why?"
well" replied the dentist, show will
| know when he is unconscious 2"
"Why is it that a red-headed wo-
man always marries a very meek
man ?"
"She doesn't. He just gets that way"
-
watch out, niger. Use hard. SO
hard ! busts buzz saw when / runs
again it,"
/ Huh Call that hard? Why, Use
so hard | scratches the bath tub"
/ =
Jim Jones was born in the city and
while yet young man went into the
country TO work on a farm. Did he
ever tell you why he came back to
the city TO live? No2 ] don't blame
him. Well, I'll tell you.
The second day he was on the farm
ne was called before dawn and told to
harness the mule TO the sleigh. He
was too tired to light lantern, and in
the lark he didn't notice that a COW
was in the stable with the mule. The
farmer, impatient at the long delay.
shouted from the house:
Jones, what are you doing out
there2"
Il can't get the collar over the
mules head" Jones yelled back, "his
ears are frozen stiff"
4 4 n n