davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Brattleboro daily reformer. (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1913-1955, 1922-04-20
National League.
YESTERDAYS GAMES.
American League.

Boston. ; 10
New York, 3 8
Quinn and Walters; Mayo and Schang.
First game.)
New York, 6 Is O
Boston,
Hoyt and Schang Russell, Fullerton
and Walters. (Second game.)
St Louis. Is 20 o
Cleveland,
Vangider and SEVERED; Coveleskie,
Pott, Keefe and Nunamaker.
Arizona republican., 1922-03-07

pie think OF visiting the cemeteries
outside the city when they set out
for a Sunday afternoon stroll. De-
cidedly. the dead are not so much
with us as they were a few centuries,
or even few generations. back.
Tombstones Topics Of Talk
Then, tombstones were a live topic.
A man expected to have an epitaph
written about him. and IL there was
any fear in his mind that his rela-
tives would not make good Job Of 1t,
he wrote the label for his stone him
self or hired a professional TO write
ore.
Ben Johnson, Milton and Pope
write epitaphs. Shakespeare wrote
his own epitaph in a four-line verse
of warning to any who might wish
to disturb his bones. To dash off a
witty epitaph for a friend or enemy
was a parlor trick with which kings
and courtiers whiled away a dull aft
ernoon.
Thus when Charles II casually
sked Rochester TO write his epitaph,
the courtier thought a minute and
I produced the following now famous
| lines:
| Here lies our mutton eating king,
Whose word no man relied on;
Who never said a foolish thing.
And never did a wise one.
The king took no offense but set
his brains 10 work and composed a
Arizona republican., 1922-03-07
THE DEVIL AND THE DEEP SEA
EmiIe Amavet, director Of industries in Burna,
BY DIR. FRANK CRANE
Copyright. 1921. by Frank Crane)

Emile Amavet, director OF industries in Burma
some time ago reported the following:
81 have succeeded in photographing marine mon
ser of the order cephalopoda which has been thrown
up on this coast This mammoth OF the Indian ocean
measured when alive nearly 30 metres IN length and
weighed about 80 tons No one has yet been able to
identify to classify it scientifically The natives
frightened by its fabulous dimensions, have been cut
ting it up with hatchets for twelve days What is this
animal? Is it the devil of the deep sea which, accord
ing to the legend used to attack barks and drag them
to the bottom of the ocean? It's flesh is as hard as
indiarubber 1t is probably several centuries old and
rare descendant from anteduvian times, when the
marine fauna Of the most monstrous type"
Is there some truth after all, in the legend Of the
Sea Serpent?
At any rate, it is much more in the realm of prob
ability that grotesque and unknown monsters habit the
deep places of the than it is that spoo friendly
and otherwise wander among men.
1t is thing we do not realize, that there is more
life in the ocean than in the air.
The surface Of the sea is great curtain, which
conceals from us vast world, teeming with living
creatures.
We catch great many of them and destroy and
deyour them but then they catch great many Of us,
and probably enjoy eating us as much as we enjoy eat
ing them.
The vast depths of the mighty waters have not
been fully explored and it is quite within the realm Of
possibility that there jabberwoks and gazooums
hidden down there, whose acquaintance we have not
yet made.
III TACT, HuHldH lie Is SuTrOuHueu Dy regions Lnab
trail off into mystery.
Within us, and about U.s. is the innumerabIe COM
Ipany of microbes. For all the inhabitants of the
microscopic world have not yet been listed Above us
the regions of the air. and more than one story has
been told of palpabe monsters that lurk there and
threaten too-daring aviators.
Most of the regions Of the solid earth have been
pretty we'll investigated but there depths of the
sea so far has been able to plumb.
AS matter of fact, large section of scientific
ODniOn has the nOSShilitV thn
ence of the Sea Serpent Anyhow, it opens up fas-
cinating field for and gives us something
new to worry about in get to feeling too COM
Portable.
Arizona republican., 1922-03-07

We are only curious but not at all anxious, to
know to just what extent advertisers permitted
to go in apprising public Of the facilities they
afford for assistance in the violation of laws.
This curiosity has been aroused by advertise
ment we have encountered in a Prescott newspaper.
The advertisement begins with description in dog
gerel of the untimely end Of one Sandy McGrew who
in the process OF manufacturing home brew used
a utensil made of the wrong kind of metal and
Now he's gone to far-of land
The advertisement proceeds Moral Have
them made of copper. We have good stock of cop
per and can make you anything you wish"
This is plainly an offer promote distillng along
correct lines. We wondered then what would happen
to an enterprising merchant who would advertise
skillfuly designed burglars TOOLS appliances TO
make porch-climbing easy, or reliable Knockout
drops
1t seems to us that If this kind OF advertising is
not barred it be barred only by the newspapers
themselves.
There is another rather more guarded but still
more effective incentive offered people to break
the prohibition law. 1t purports to be warning
against violation of the law advising prospective
purchasers Of various ingredients used in home brew
against putting in too much sugar or yeast or some
thing else for disregard of that Injunction would
result in an unlawful beverage which by the way is
what the brewers striving after all the time
Arizona republican., 1922-03-07

sauare miles in colonies and depend
encies. France, with all her pos
sessions. has a population almost the
equal to that of continental United
States.
J. g; {. "h'" ia Easter Sunday W.
A. Easter is the first Sunday aft
err the first full moon after the 21st
of March. This year 1t will fan on
April Is.
@. Is il true that the proportion Of
weight to height in men should be
two pounds to the inch? v. w. D.
A. The Surgeon Generals office
says that average statistics are based
on 2,097 pounds to the inch. but that
the army used two pounds to the
inch up to 81 inches. over that, z
pounds TO the inch is added.
/. J. r.
s A. Calamity Jane was an Amer
lean army scout and mail carrier.
She was an aide to General Custer
and General Miles in numerous cam
paigns and carried mail between
Deadwood, S. D.. and Custer. Mont.
@. ls there an airship which does
not use gas for initiation? 1. /. o.
A. The air service says that an
invention has been reported IN Italy
by which the ship rises by the rare
faction of the air within the machine.
Ii is a dirgible which can carry 30
Arizona republican., 1922-03-07
FORECAST FOR THE NEW YEAR

January
There will be a shakeup in the
staff Of prohibition enforcement Of
ficers.
Quotations on rye in case lots win
go up $40.
There will be grave disturbances ia
Ireland, Egypt, Germany, Kansas, and
the Scene Shifters' union.
Eugene ". Debs will be extensively
interviewed, kissed and photographed.
Skating and skiing pictures will
predominate in the newspapers and
the movies.
Senator Watson will challenge a
fellow senator to a fist fight.
The government will announce a
probe into the high cost Of food.
There will be considerable snow
rain. and slush, with the usual suits
for damages against the city and
universal criticism of Anticipated
street cleaning machinery.
February
Millions of people will agree that
there being but 2S days in It, Feb
ruary ough. 70 be a short month.
The grounding will get more space
in the newspapers than Lloyd George
and the Prince of Wales. Secretary
Hughes or the two latest French
ballet dancers to be photographed
on the Carmania with their knees
crossed.
The worst snow storm in years"
will arrive and every municipality
will come forward with the worst
excuse in years for not having pre-
pared for it.
Vice President Coolidge will pro-
nounce Abraham Lincoln great
American. Also G. Washington.
Senator Watson will threaten to
punch a United States army officer
in the nose during an investigation
into the refusal of a major general
of the Sixty-ninth division to share
a case OF Scotch with the hostler.
There win be a shakeup of the
prohibition enforcement officers.
Case goods will go up $40.
The government will announce in
quiry into the high cost OF food
stuffs.
March
Eastern newspapers will publish
old photographs showing street
scenes during the blizzard of 1888.
There will be big shakeup OF pro
hibition officers. Drug stores will
Jack up the price 10 Vt drink.
Colleagues viii restrain Senator
Watson from punching member OF
the senate committee on ducks and
brakes
There win be grave disturbances
in Ireland.
Rev. DR.. Crafts win denounce all
forms of pleasure.
The government will announce ar
inquiry into high food prices.
April
A half baked designer OF French
pastry win appear on Broadway In
the first straw hat of the season and
be pursued ny 5000 camera men.
President Harding will show i'm
proving form at golf.
Arizona republican., 1922-03-07
CENSORED TOMBSTONEs

WASHINGTON, D. c., Mar. g.
Censorship is now beng carried to
the very grave. The latest thing in
censors, according to serious minded
trade journal which keeps UP with
tombstone news, is censor of cpl
taphs. This official has been ap-
pointed in an unnamed English vii
lage and entrusted with the lob of
seeing that graveyard solemnity is
not violated by flippant quips and
epigraIns on the tombstones.
English Wears for a number of
years have supervised to some extent
tombstone sentiments. 1t may seem
strange that now, when epitaphs are
no longer INDUCED in by poets or
poetasters, there should be any great
need for q special guardian of tomb
stone dignity. But the dangers. il
seems. are in the pitaphs which have
been perpetrated in the past. Graved
on old, moss grown. tottering stones,
the verses of a century or two ago
oftentimes express sentiments re-
gardiug death and the dead that are
flipuant, irreverent, and in short, un-
suited for public perusal in this high
~ regulated age.
Our attitude toward tombstones
undoubtedly has changed. 1t is not
so much that we think more solemn
ly OF death; but rather that we think
less of it, The churyard is seldom
the graveyard any longer. Few peo-
Arizona republican., 1922-03-07

order that may not becomes more of annoyance,
or too much of nuisance.
We trust people not always, though, to
do the right thing at exactly the right time but al
ways to do the right thing in time, before it is
everlastingly too late If democracy should
time fail it will not be because the people de-
Perforated but because they will have believed that
they have found something better. There is though,
in America nothing better in sight and none in
temptation except among the few Socialists and the
fewer anarchists, the latter of whom dreaming Of
time when shall all be good and wise, that
we live in perfect and blessed state of anar-
chy which would make the millennium superfluous.
Arizona republican., 1922-03-07

passengers and a crew OF 2S The
machine Is built OF duralumin, and
consists Of concentric chambers, en-
abling the air to be rarefied in each
until the machine Is enabled to rise.
This is accomplished by machinery
connected with the motors. and can
be varied, enabling the ship TO rise.
fall and move at varied speeds.
q. Where are earthquakes most
frequent? r, 2. p.
A. Japan probably has the most
earthquakes Within a period OF s
years, 1881 shocks were recorded.
this being an average OF three a day.
q. What are drop biscuits? r. S.
A. Drop biscuits are made just as
other baking powder biscuits are, ex-
cept that more liquid Is used. The
biscuits should be OF such consist
ency that they may be dropped from
the spoon upon baking sheet or tin.
but no thin enough TO cause them 20
spread.
@. What 10 meant by keel haul
ing7 D. r.
A. Keel hauling was a form Of
punishment inflicted in the navies Of
the British Empire and the Neither
lands. BY means of tackles, usually
on the foreyard arms, the offender
was hauled from one side OF the ship
TO the other underneath the keel.
Weights attached 20 the feet insured
the sinking Of the culpriL.
Arizona republican., 1922-03-07
No.hirc q a. nskeered or

Mrs Carrie Chapman Gait is worrying about
something else again. She sees ten menaces to
American democracy II the feminist movement ana
tho League of woman Voters are unable to dspel
them Mrs Gait fears the worst Among the peris
listed by her are iiteracy ignorance partsanis in
difference government by groups, patronage, the
use Of money bosses, slander and abuse All this
constitutes the hydra headed monster OF which we
have heard much.
we have lived for many years but we cannot look
back to a time when somebody was not desparing of
the republic or the democracy Nor, by the way since
we come to think of 1t, can remember time when
somebody was not apprehensive Of the early end Of
the world We are prone to perceive imaginary and
imminent disaster.
we do not believe that the American democracy
or anv other existing will survive for
ever we think from analogy that they will each
perish from the earth" No government since history
has been recorded has survived for more than few
hundred years The Swiss republic is the Oldest Oh
them ALL But every successive government, once It
was fairly established, either Immediately better
than Its predecessor else was rude stepping stone
to something No section OF the civilized earth
was ever long without a government, and + has
always been such government as the people at
the time demanded
There are unmistakable signs OF change OF
rovernnent in other countries but we can peIcSlNS
none at all of a Revolutionary change in our own
We were never in peril but and then matter
was settled which removed that peril So long as
we agree upon our loyalty to the constitution which
Americans have always held sacred and so long as
,ya agree upon its meaning, and Americans are now
more nearly in accord as 10 that than ever before
the democracy is secure
II is true that we have iliteracy and ignorance
ana anathy There are still bosses, but fewer and
80, ;sl,entiaI ones than ever before We have the
~, ~ money but in a much lesser degree than at
,,,,e within the last half century. The influence
- patronage has been greatly curailed. Our great
cst fault is our apathy. ANY government ana any
min, else with which mortals have to do must have
,stant attention 1t will so wrong SO affairs IN
- overnment have gone wrong from time to time
. ,he,, have never come to the brink OF the
ci,,ce when they have become bad enough apa-
- "a, hen driven away and even the illterate and
,.norant have been made TO understand that there
.o.a of correction in which they must perform
! part e,.., co. 5ou,o
., srn, Of government than we have been at any
49, thin the last hundred years. The people that
10 great mass OF the people, are better INFORMED
ore intelligent than they ever we're before ana
- ,esults OF democracy rest upon the inteIl-
/. 49,, neople immigration, it is true, has
,~ an element Of ignorance which many
,..,,+ - be menacing but it has never been
,,ore than annoying. In comparison Win tHs ''''e
vstriotisrn Of Americans, it may be regard
o negligible and We are now a"aAen'u ~ 'n9
ca ,rttr - q rigid restriction Of immigration IN
Arizona republican., 1922-03-07
THE ONCE OVER
BY H. 1. PHILLIPS

There will be an Easter parade in
all American communities.
There will be a shakeup of pro-
hibition enforcement officers. Cir
will be hard to get for the next
day or two.
There will be grave disturbances
in Belfast, Egypt, Berlin, Moscow
the Chicago stockyards, and the
American Federation OF Hat Trim
mers.
Home gardening will start.
Senator Watson will be restrained
from attacking a colleague who crit
icized him for exceeding his quota
OF free garden seeds.
There will be a. shakeup OF pro-
hibition enforcement officers.
June
Big shalaeup OF prohibition en-
forcement officers
The Harding summer capital viii
be announced.
Vincent Astor's yacht will be shown
in the photogravure sections togeth'
er with pictures Of Charlotte Boyle
and other women swimmers.
There will be rumors that Doue
Fairbanks and Mary Pickford are to
separate,
First heat wave.
July
Norwich will win another race.
Styles in women bathing suits
will be asSailed from pulpits ano
forums.
Asbury Park and Rye, n. J.. will
pass ordinances requiring all bathing
to be done while fully dressed and in
Quaker costume.
There win be shakeup OF pro-
hibition officials.
Bourbon will go up So a quart.
The government will continue Il
announce a war to the death on boot.
leggers.
August
The S. P. G. A. will start a cam
paign to provide for ice caps fol
horses.
The board walk at Atlantic City
will be crowded with people whC
have left cool homes to spend two
weeks walking In the hot sun.
There will be a shakeup OF pro.
hibition enforcement officers.
September
There will be reports OF great de.
struction by the boil weevil in the
cotton belt.
A H. Woods Will produce his new
play, "One Thousand and One Bras.
sieres."
October
Mr.. Woods play will be denozncet
| as indecent
November
The courts will pronounce the play
o. K.
December
Mr.. Woods play will be packing
'em to the doors.
Senator Watson will threaten Il
punch a witness before a senate com.
mittee.
All liquors will 80 UP $40 a case.
There will be a shakeup OF pro,
hibition enforcement officers.
Arizona republican., 1922-03-07
TUESDAY MORNING. MARCH 7, 1929
The very curse of an eviI deed is
that 1t IS that 1t must 0laUGys con-
ti1eue to epgender eviI.-Schiller.


We hope not impertinently inqusitive but
would like to know what has become Of House
Bill which we believe was sent to the senate nine
days and the following day regular would
have been referred to standing committee.
House Bill is known as the Kimban BILL
amendment to the Improvement Act to provide live
1ier competition in bidding for street paving
tracts. This legislation recommended in the call
Of the governor and had been recommended by the
Phoenix and Tucson chapters OF the American Asso
citation of Engineers.
1t has recently been reported that there is
soker" the bill but we are inclined suspect that
he "joker' is in the Of the 'joker" The
amendment is a very simple one so plain and trans
parent that there be pretense OF ambiguity. 1t
herely provides that city commissions and councils
nay advertise for bids alternative types Of paving
nstead of being restricted to single type because
an enterprising solicitor has succeeded in securing
tgnatures representing something more than 50 per
ent Of the frontage certain district, for petit
son calling for particular type of paving.
1t has been argued against the amendment that
Il may deprive the people their choice OF types As
matter Of fact the signers rule want no choice
They merely want some type OF paving and generally
do not sign petitions with great deal Of enthusiasm
What they want when they want any paving, is
durable type that will cost them the least. And no
type viii cost them the when that type is in the
field alone, removed from competition.
Very frequently the signers OF petitions, and we
suppose that so majority Of instances do not
inquire what type is proposed to be laid They are
asked if they will sign a petition for paving and
then they sign they do not.
The amendment is which ought not to con-
sumo great deal of committee time. 1t reported
promptly out of a house committee. On the earliest
succeeding day the comttee Of the whole agreed TO-
it without debate or opposition and the following
day it was passed by a unanimous vote.
Arizona republican., 1922-03-07
Questions And
.AnSuUers

(Any reader can get the answer TO
any question by writing The Repub-
lican Information Bureau, Frederic j.
Haskin, Director, Washington. ID. c..
This offer applies strictly to infor-
nation. The bureau cannot give ad-
vice on legal. medical and financial
matters. It does not attempt TO set
tie domestic troubles, nor to under
take exhaustive research on any
subject Write your question plainly
and briefly. Give fun name and ad-
dress and enclose > cents in stamps
for return postage All replies are
sent direct to the Inquirer.
Q. How many miles Of territory
did France gain in the late war7
e, X.
"A. France gained 5,605 square
miles of territory ana also $50
Arizona republican., 1922-03-07
THE rHINe SOUNDS EAMILlAR

In the Gulf of California lies the island of Tibu-
ron inhabited by an Indian tribe in which the
completely dominated by the
When young man desires young in
marriage he must before wedding her, serve her for
one year in the capacity of slave If he behaves him
self during this period the thing is arranged and,
the wedding day. the bride paints her face white as
a sign OF triumph.
Perhaps the young women who in civilized lands,
wear white gowns instead of painting their faces
white. do so with the same motives. Our slaves how
ever are sometimes recacitrant-Let Petit Parisen.
Paris (Transated for the Republican,.
Arizona republican., 1922-03-07
BertOn BrdleyS Daily Poem
OneKind of Writin3

Whine, whine whine, whine!
Whine about life "as fit only for swine"
Dwell the flesh and deny the Divine,
And brand Of critic will shout out, for sure,
That's literature!"
Crab, crab crab, crab!
Crab that there isn't color but drab,
Fill up your pages with gloomies CAB,
And one brand of critics viii cry, enough,
Marvellous stuff"
Snivel snvel, SWIVEL snive
Swivel that faith, hope and love but drivel
Snive, that fates been intensely uncivil
And there is group which will say from the start
Gosh, but that's art!"
Wall wall, wall waili
Wall that all effort is certain TO fail
Wall about things that dreary and stale
Same little group will just follow along
With Gosh! Amt it srong?"
Wall, snivel crab whine
Chapter by chapter, and line by lne
Maybe that's art, s critics agree,
But somehow it's nothing but yellow" to me,
Yellow stuff set down by cutters who pine,
And wall
Swivel,
Crab.
Whine,