The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1922-11-02

him by de hand und shouted: "Brohlbl-
ton Prohibition YAH und of course We
got it. More vadder blease). Why, oh
veil you know und We will keep it any
how until de last is gone or until de
booth leggers get out of de country. VOt
do you, mine friends, dink? Vot? (Hearty
applause from the crowd-more, more,
more).
Den dere vas some ding else. How
many of you dot vas here object to vomens
wearing short skirts? AS far as l vas
concern und l guess dot l would voice de
majority of de beople in politics. l mind
mine own business first und only find fault
where such is to be found. On my last trip
to New York to order Won new supply
for mine store l vent into Won restaurant
where all sorts of crazy artists und actors
fed der face. l found Won seat by two
Neutrality-suspicious. each Won of dem form
in his obinion of de United States und as
a blaze for honest men like dere self to
live in. Dere vas in de restaurant some
Mexicans, Russians und Poles, und few
ex-bartenders lacking de nerve to peddle
Won quart of home made hutch on de sly.
What dey said vas enough to even bring
Won blush of shame on Won face. Won
fellow mitt Won good crop of vhiskers all
offer his face complain dot We as Won
Americans vas de greatest bunch of med
oilers in de world und said dot We meddled
in efer countries business und it vouldent
SURPRISE him Won bit if We didn't some day
got into troubles. He said dot Won nation
like our should be like Won plant growing
for de benefit of de inhabitants und ad-
mirers. He stop by saying someding like
dis:
"My country, Russia, vas>1ike Won rose
Won beautiful rose to stick your nose in und
to inhale its fragrance. Turkey vas not
like Won rose, but only like Won carnation.
You can stick your noses in und schmell
nit out being totally overcome by de odor
But de United States, ah, it has no smell
it has, it has"-he could not finish his sem
tence und l vent to his help und said
loud enough for de whole blaze to hear it,
You may compare de United States nit
cactus. You can stick your bolchivick nose
into de affairs of Russia und Turkey und
get de kind of fragrance you best like but
ven you try to stick your nose in de goot
old United States you will haft to hafe
Won nose guard or you will surely get
stung, und Wit dot I walk away out for
you can nefer tell vot he would de to me
(Dot ISIS if he vas near enough).
Now as to vomens clothes vot difference
does it make vether dey wear long or
short skirts. l notice dot ven you see Won
mitt short skirts your eyes-vell you
schust can't make them behave. Now iss
rot dot right? 1 will told you Won ding
ven I become mayor of dis town, l won't
care vot de women wear. Dey can wear
vot dey please, do vot dey please, schust
like mine wife vas doing. Yah, lofe
mine wife schust as much as l lofe mine
beer und pretzels und dere vas Won ding
dot | won't stand for und dot iss to let her
boss me around. She knows dot und ven
put mine foot down, she right away quick
goes away back in de corner und sit down.
Yah, chentlemen you must first learn to
be de boss of your own home und make
your wife do as you say, schust like mine,
err ahem, do -.
The speaker was suddenly interrupted
by stern face lady who had forced her
way through the crowd and upon reaching
the platform where Herr Limberger was,
gently but firmly shouted in loud voice
"Limberger you go home AT ONCE"
vent und ven l got dere, ach-vell
wish l nefer vent.
VCt did she do? Vot didn't she do. Oh,
mine gosh l vas Wishing for Won umbrella
for l dought dere vas Won storm coming
und schust as sure as you vas foot high
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