Albuquerque morning journal. [volume] (Albuquerque, N.M.) 1903-1926, 1922-01-23
Crabbscrawlings

Crabbsc rawlings
WARNING. ....
When you feel the wintry breezes
On your shapely little kneezes,
Ere you catch dose of sneezes :"
Better take off B. v. Deezes.
wANTED-second girl at Monkbridge Manor
journal Ad.
We proletarat will naturally wonder what be-
came of the first one.
Mustapha Renal is reported to have been assa s.
have suspected Fatima or Omar
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14oO chickens to be vaccinated by the county
agent.-Irreducible headline.
Keep back, men! Don't crowd!
HOW TO TREAT RELATIVES
Whitman Wright drove his cousin, Lee Giles,
home Saturday night after four-weeks visit
Arkansas paper.
Don't you suspect that this French BRAND is
Just getting ready to go on the chautauqua plat
form next summer?
HEE HAW!
Sir: Didn't the Burch and Arbuckle jures
mind you of the North Dakota judge. who, when he
told that jury after all night vigil stood
eleven to one for acquittal, said Bring up eleven
breakfasts and bale Of hay?'-EATON B. GOING.
The instructor in physiology in Philadelphia
VINO told his class tnat all girls were knOCkRneeu,
has not seen all the girls
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IN WHICH WE GET BAwLED OUT
The verse you write about the west
Hotels that grow, Barelas bridge
The lamb and lion now at rest;
1t may be good, but dunno!
The visions dreamed the visions dead
The Roslington Rattlers that daily go;
The Chamber of Commerce far ahead,
May be alright, butt dunno
Perhaps the stuff has a kick of old
And hits you with mighty blow,
It's sentiment may knock you cold,
You may be good butt dunno!
Why send your dreams all smashed to h?
If airy fancies hurt your dome
How come you had dream to tell!
II that's good stuff, then-take me home!
Tiny.
ENGLISH a. SHE is SPOKE.
Miss Stortz' singing seemed even better than
usual and the several duets between she and Ches
Byrne left but little to be desired. Journal
OH PEGGIE! HOW COULD YOU!
SIR: like your column At times it is good.
have often wondered how you keep it up week
after week. have discovered the reason. 1t is in
the 22nd chapter of Numbers the 2Sth verse first to
ninth words inclusive-PEG TOP
sir; me prohibitionists propose star in the
labor to the bootleggers!-DON FULANO
o
BITE EN-, INA, MY PINCHERs ARE COLD.
L
well and consequently attend strictly to business
my friends call me bed bug. Since you are
Crab wish you'd pinch em for me.-IMA CHASER
We lamp in the Holbrook News-you've heard
OF Hoibrook-that John Kist has been to California
PROBABLY to see his relatives, the Sunkists.
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All T TOO WE'RE WITH YOU TO A MAN:
Each morn l wish at six o'clock
had great big missile
That could throw hundred blocks
And smash that sawmill whistle
-TooTIE FOOT!
r. Perry Scope observes that the Society for the
prevention OF Something Other evidently did not
attend the concert when Miss Rea sang the encore
about the lilac bush bearing apples We marvel
that those who denounce the Blood of the Con-
querors' did not also protest against this risnue
mule dtty All of which reminds one of the wheeze
ma was once popularity applied to Andrew Com
truth" w" 'ie H'Neu
OMIYES! A NUMBER OF TIMES,
. SIR Surely you have heard Of the high school
boy who was describing the surrender Of leo IN
Grant. and said that while Lee resplendent in
new Confederate uniform, Grant had on nothing
but an old Union sut-H. s. '22.
THE BEST STATE
I've rambled about quite bit in my time
I've travelled the hills and the plains
I've gone from the SHOWS to tropical cline,
From deserts to every day rains.
I've visited states where the field were all green,
And some where the hills were all hare 9'
And others where factories were to be seen
While In some not thing was there
I've asked as rambled, to find II could
Why a man likes that place, or this
Why states that hold some are to Others no good
While others think theirs is plain bliss
1t puzzled me then, how each boosted his own.
- But now 1 am free to confess
The state that each plugged for was simply home
And where he had found happiness.
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GREATEST CONTEST! OPEN TO ALI
We nave opened this column n mr. CONTp
and READERS for suggestions for a name for THE
NEW HOTEL. ~ ~
-, The PRIZE to be given for the BEST NAME
will be SURPRISE.
=. The judges, if they can be induced to serve
will be: ~ w.
Mr. r. E. Putney and Mr. Carl c. Magee vs.. Mr.
Jack Raynolds and Mr. A. b. McMilen assisted nv
sary. ivy a. - iS0e'
The RULES governing the CONTEST are quite
SIMPLE, in KEEPING with this COLUMN
III The NAME must not include more than
FOUR WORDS, and preferably only ONE or TWO
% 1t must be DESCRIPTIVE of the COM
MUNlTY SPIRIT which made the HOTEL, nossi-
bic. This RESTRICTION may TAX your IMAGIN-
ALIVE powers, but no GREAT RESULT was ever
accomplished without GREAT EFFORT The ave-
nues for the FREE COINAGE of WORDS are
WIDE OPEN in this CONTEST
(3) The only name that is BARRED Is "Blood
OF the Conquerors," as will have no naughty
naughties connected with our HOTEL.
just as a SUGGESTION, the HOTEL might be
called THE SIDE WEILer something like that
subtle, you know, like a BILLBOARDl
Answers should be mailed so TO reach us
lEf- kNsAs