Arizona republican., 1922-01-07
LARDNER WEEKLY LETTER


To the editor:
/ see by the papers where they are
putting on old fashion spell down in
Detroit and giveing away prizes to
the kids that can spell the best and
etc. and a event like this kind always
stirs up a lot of int. in a town and is
a good thing for a town though it
does seem kind of funny to hold a
spelling contest in place where
they put a in Cousins.
But any way they's no subject
which / am more interested in IL
than the subject of spelling and this
may come as a surprise to some of
my readers as the impression seems
to of got around that | am not A.
No / speller though nothing could
be further than the truth. They may
be a good many wds. which l don
spell them the same way like they
are spelled in the dictionary but that
is no sign that my way amt just as
good and maybe a little better and
always say that if people can under
stand easy what man means, why
that means he is a good speller and
| will bet you can't find no wds. in
any of my writeings that is Il as
hard to understand as wds. you will
find in the dictionary.
In fact the dictionary way of spell
ing wds. is so hard that after every
wd. they half to write down some
other wd. that means the same thing
so as people can tell what the 1st
wd. meant.
Speaking about the dictionary it
has got a couple of chapters in 1t
which you can read without going TO
sleep and one OF them tells where
several different men of learning has
tried to fix up our language so as
every letter would have only one
sound and as soon as you seen a wd.
spelled out you would know the right
way to pronounce it. and one Of
these men said the only way that
could be done would be by adding
IA more letters TO the alphabet. This
idear was throwed in the ash can
on motion of the people that makes
alphabet soup.
In another chapter it tells where
man named Ellis was trying expert
ments with the letters we have all
ready got and he found out that you
can spell the wd. scissors 5000 diff
ferent ways. 1t didn't tell what he
done with himself the rest of the
morning. And it didn't tell why we
half to go on spelling it scissors
when sizzers would cut your nails
just as pretty.
WHY WORRY?
Fl. L. Mencken has wrote q book
on the American Language, which
he brings out in it how different we
spell than the English though we are
supposed to both be useing the same
tongue.
Well. they will be more and more
differents as the yrs. go by, so what
say is that 1t don't do no harm for
me to spell wd. different from the
way some old English dictionary
writer spelled it, provided ! make the
spelling easier, which is what Ameri-
cans generally always do. Like for
inst. an Englishman would say:
Il have the honour to enclose a |
cheque."
Whereas we would say:
i have the honor to enclose a !
check, which is two less letters which |
don't amt. to much in one sente, ce |
but would be a big saving in long |
book. Take Wells's history book for !
example, and If he had used American !
spelling / bet he could of wrote it |
in at least u hr. less time.
Vile we are on the subject of |
spelling, though l don't want to dis
courage none of the Detroit boys and |
gals that's trying to improve them
seifs along those lines, vet it seems
nessary to say at this pit. that SPELL
ing Is something which you can't
master no more than singing alto.
Either you are born good speller or
a born bum speller and If you are a
good speller you won't half to spend
no time in school studying how to
spell this wd. or that.
On the other hand If you are a
rotten speller you will keep on , cling
rotten speller though If you have
got a good memory you can get high
marks.
Like for inst, know a girl that
when she was in school she always
got 100 in spelling because she
studied all the wds. that was IN the
book and memorized how to spell
them. But for the 1st 2 yrs. after
we was married we lived on Prairie
Ave. In Chicago and every time she
wanted to write and tell one of her
friends her address. she would half
to go out first and look at the street
sign. But woman don't half to be
a good speller to be a good wife and
In fact some of the best wifes l know
has their bad spells.
FAMOUS MEN NO SPELLERS
But they's another wd. of cheer
which / might breath to folks that
aas trouble with their spelling and !