South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1922-06-11
why Not More?
By Winifred Black

BY Winifred Black
n o they're going to cut the obey
out Of the wedding ceremony.
- are they?
I wonder what they'll put in 10
take its place.
And while they're about It, why
don't they do a little more cutting?
The woman promises to love,
honor and obey, the man vows 10
love. cherish and protect-how
about that promise 20 ''protect?"
II you're going 10 cut out the
obey" why not forget the pro
tcct' at the same time? That's
playing fair isn't TT
''Obey''-what a strange survival
that word isl Who ebeys anyone
in this day and age? Why. the
children don't obey the parents, they
don't obey the teachers. You and
I don't obey the laws OF the land.
Obey! II sounds like something
carved on a tomb in some forgotten
graveyard.
Who wants anyone else to obey
him, or her?
don't want my child to do right
because I tell him TO do right, or
vii punish him I want him to do
right because II Is right. because il
makes him happy TO be kind and
Just and generous. not because
somebody says he must do so.
don't want my friend to love me
because It IS a duty
don't want my sister 10 obey and
I am quite sure if she wanted me TO
obey her. she would be apt 20 find
herself very much disappointed.
No courageous. self-respectng
soul obeys or wants 70 obey slavish-
" any other human being.
Yes, that's an fashioned word
and 1t was an old-fashioned man
who wrote it into the wedding cere-
nony.
Weddings were old-fashioned
things. even in that day.
The wedding ring used TO be. a
OF a slave-and women in those
days were proud 20 be owned and
ruled
I wonder If they were very much
less unhappy than the women today.
Strange place 10 put such a word
Into the wedding ceremony.
Love never asks obedience. never
wants obedience. Love demands
sympathy and understanding mot
obedience.
And vet. somehow. I don't think
I'd like a girl very we'll who would
mt marry a man until she made
the minister promise 20 cut the
word obey out of the beautiful old
ceremony. There is something
wrong with her, something stubborn
and obstinate and self-willed-
something little and nagging. and
something selfish and egotistical or
she'd never even think Of raising
such a question
For better or for worse. for
richer or for poorer, in sickness and
r health until death do us part
who would dare 10 try to improve
upon the beauty of these linked
syllaIbles?
Every letter OF them ought to be
sacred TO every woman who has a
particle Of sentiment in her heart
Your mother spoke those words
dear little mother. can't you imagine
her as a bride?
She wasn't afraid 10 promise "a
obey-she knew and loved the mar
she was marrying and she would
have followed him around the world
n she had had 10 go barefooted q
do il. She knew that he loved her
too. and that he would cherish and
protect her as long as he lived
What would she have done n yoU
had said anything TO her about
changing the marriage ceremony
. Why she loved IL. every word or Il
I every syllable Of it, She loved q
think of IL and 20 dream Of it-thi'
. ceremony that linked her 10 the one
man she loved as long as they bOtf
should live
How queer we are, we moderns
+ always picking flaws In everything
II I knew "A girl who wanted tht
. obey taken out Of the wedding
. ceremony and man who refused 2,
promise 20 protect" her. I should
go 90 their wedding with a ligh
( heart-they're we'll matched
But woe 70 the poor cOnfidins
: man who marries a girl who Is s,
+ dead-set on having her own wal
trat she is goigg 70 make a fus
about Il at the very altar,