Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1922-10-18
MRS. MILLS W1ANTEDA " ZODEv NEST:
LETTERS BARE PASSION FOR HALL

10 Talk ABOUT IN Jne DOOk. we "uSe
take 1t with us when we ride and talk
This man Keable certainly knows
peoples hearts. / love Chris and Ceci!s
few hours together. How he vows he
will kiss her before leaving Mallory's.
Oh, 1t is sweet. darling--but nothing
compared to our love. How they hnger1
behind the others, their love vows, ana
how they rush into each Others arms.
"Earths Longings Now Fulfilled"
''Take the book with you--7or. else
will leave It in your room. don't want
10 read such books again, ever. Why!
You know. They make me dream.
Yearning for what. perhaps. l miss In
this life. And to think now and here
after / will never escape this longing
until our souls are ut last one. hate
to come back to realities--as l always
have to. Reading books (oh. love
them y makes me yearn. and as much
as love it-why does 1t pain to have
to come back to even. taking food for
nouristment9 So / long for the time
when I will have you forever and dream.
dreams,-no yearnings. ...,e,,.s.
All earth's longings now fulhlledr
Yesterday I was happy, In Away. On
the boat and in the water. But, on the
way home was thinking hard, darl-
ting; 1t is as IL we have had glimpse
of what our souls cry out for aAd then
be denied again. And / feel as though I
never want to hear you say again :!
love you or caress, or kiss me SO hard
It hurts. You haven't any right to and
then wake me up. Or is it myself?
"When any one else calls you an
endearing name and you say dear 1t
is far more merciful Of you to stab me.
How can I even call you darling as I
have this morning.
20, / ought not make It harder for
you-but that is what you do to me and
/ am not repaying, just stating what
is the truest fact. You say we are
favored for having such a great love.
But always--it Is SO and will ever be-
we must always take the bitter with
the sweet And hope don't see you
today. What is the use. when you
always leave me. Oh, my darling
babykins, what muddle we are in.
But will be content. WILL"
On Her Knees, Worshiping, Adoring
In the letter, Mrs. Mills says she
is ION my knees darling, looking up at
my. noble man, worshiping, adoring." "
dearest. dearest boy Of mine, good
morning.
"What Joy and peace. is ours today.
And strength. How gracious God Is to
privilege us to know this most joyous
greatest blessing.
Precious true heart, I will write
this afternoon when I ! will have more
time.
II am on my knees, darling. looking
up at my noble man, worshiping,
adoring.
"Wonder Of wonders-that I love you
even more than yesterday-more frag-
rant, this love Of ours"
Third Letter Tells Of Illness
Another letter of the first batch,
written when Mrs. Mills was suffering
of toothache, tells Of her disappoint :
ment in not seeing the rector the day
before. She had advised him not Ia
call upon her because "he was here.''
dearing terms, and contains the prom
Use to keep tryst with DR.. Hall, no
matter "how much 1t pains" 1t fol-
| lows:
"Six o'clock.
"Oh, darling, darling mine, what
painful hours today. When I got back
from church, in addition to my pain
was so troubled about you. As I
told you l didn't. speak a word to
any one. got undressed and sat in a
rocker, no peace anywhere. I guess
| l was weak from the pain and no sleep
last night. Soon l became drowsy and
lay down and slept for an hour. When
l awoke torturous, dear, cannot tell
you how 1t has pained. I was alone
then and had no one to telephone to
you.
"Oh, dear, I knew you would be
anxious and disappointed, but, darling,
l walked the floor until 4 80. Haven't
l said. oh, he will know an suffering
and cannot come up When I came
back from Miss Opie's, l was sicker
than before as you were disappointed.
l can ahrdly cry. Although now the
pain isn't continuous as 1t was, It
ceased for about ten minutes.
Il wish some one would be merciful
to me and give me something to put ne
to sleep, to forget, forget you were
disappointed, how you felt this morning,
and get some relief from this constant
pain. | never felt so miserable as l do
now. You asked me did I want you to
come; Honey. mine, l was needing you
as only you know-but he was here, and
so l said not to come.
,Iomorrow, believe, I'll walk miles
and be alone. Darling, can I bear IT.
MY ear aches, too. The pain goes
to the top Of my head. Worse than be-
fore, for am sick over the disappoiut.
ment Of not seeing you. 1t pains so at
times | stumble in walking around here,
and almost fell. Why it doesn't turn
your mind don't know, although truly,
dear, it isn't as painful as it was.
II want you---your arms to hold me
and fold me close, II only to forget
this pain for moment. Nothing will
cure me now but that. I was tempted
to drink enough to put me to sleep, but
d! am strong enough to realize it would
do uncurable harm to the kidney,
Dearest, give me some word of com.
fort. Tell me you know I was wild
to come to you this afternoon, but I
couldn't. 1t will take hours for the
pain of disappointment to leave me.
My darling, who cares every moment
and suffers with me. Just to look at
you tonight will be relief and Joy.