The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1922-11-24
ON SECOND THOUGHT
BY JAY =. HOUSE.
tFron Philadelphia Public LsdgaRl

Our Ticket
For President in 1924
SAMUEL G. BLYTHE
OF California and the Waldorf-Astoria
Platform Not another green shall be
trapped
Mr.. Blythe needs no introduction to
readers of this column, but brief refer
ence to his qualifications for the place
| is pertinent and timely. He is the
| first man with the courage and the
prescIence to come publicly to the de-
Tense of that downtrodden and OPP
pressed individual, the dub golfer.
He is not enough of a Republican to
ALLEVIATE congenital Democrats. nor
enough OF a Democrat to offend con-
the leisure necessary to one who de-
votes himself to public affairs.
Meanwhile. we suggest the following
campaign slogans and move their
adoption:
Fewer bunkers and better fairways.
Millions for greens, but not a cent
for traps.
Make golf game for those who pay
its bills.
Senator Newberry's resignation was
a happy thought 1t relieves his fell
low senators of the odium of assocfNt-
ing with one who in his campaign for
office spent more money than the law
allows. But We trust his conspicuous
service to this country will not be
forgotten by those whose methods of
bookkeeping enabled them to achieve
victory without compromising them
selves.
What was this conspicuous service?
Why, he kept Henry Ford out of the
United States senate
Tho Great American Novel.
Sir-Anent your oil stock byplay.
some day I'm going to write a story
with plot like this: An oil stock pro-
motion company with a piece of bar
rem land as a basis has such good
sales agent that it sells out the whole
stock issue, and just about that time
its one "come-on" well begins beIch-
ing out oil at the rate of several mill
lion barrels an hour, leaving the pro-
motors high and dry with no stock in
the company that owns the well. OF
course, ultimately they would beat the
suckers anyway, because that's what
suckers are for, but my story would
end before that. Can you get Boni &
Liveright to publish it? A. r, w.
We think that is corking idea for
a story. But it has one inherent weak
ness. That is the assumption that an
oil stock promotion company would go
to the trouble and expense of acquir-
ing land. However. A. r. w. is
gifted facile gentleman. He might
be able to play the sour note in his
scenario so pianissimo that nobody
would notice it.
Wen take the matter up with Boni
& Isiveright, but we are satisfied the
procedure is mere gesture. We don't
relieve Boni & Liveright would touch
it. The formula is too cold and pas
sionless for their clientele. We doubt
N,@ Il xrr-iT Tr1rr a
NV could make an oil well throb.
Correspondence concerning our flu
tile endeavor to secure tickets for the
Some write to twit, others, to sympa-
thize, but nobody incIoses tickets. a
woman friend in Ardmore is doing her
dcr1ldest. Ike Lambert, upon whom
we leaned in calm assurance, alone is
silent.
We met Ike in the Bellevue two
weeks ago come Friday night. With
him we talked of many thingss. Be
ginning at "'grasshopper'' year we
skirted The declivity of time by way OF
politics, sports, economics, ancient
and modern history, literature and art.
We talked to him of soft shell crabs,
the latest fox trot, bass fishing in the
Cottonwood river. the marking of
Pawnee Rock, the cats knickerD Jck-
ers and, in the end. of the Army-Navy
game, thus laying bare the subject
resting most heavily upon our con-
sciousness. Forget it, quoth Ike.
I'll get you tickets. If worst comes
to Worst I'll get Bill Montgomery's
he won't be coming to the game.'
And that was the last we heard of
Ike.
Meanwhile. the light gossamer-;ike
substance of our self-esteen is~beiag
prickeL in q thousand places. Every
time we cross the threshold of our
modest apartment we hear Adelaide
saying: ia like to go to a football
game once in a while. too. You go to
West Point, you go to Princeton and I
stay at home without word. But
when 1 cypress a desire to see he
Arrny-Navy game you say you can't
get tickets. You can't amount to
very much or you could get tickets to |
a FOOTBALL game"
Will Ike Lambert kindly write? All |
we want from him is just one little |
word, Eyes" or mo" Just yes" CT
mo"
RwmmA- ana snAaam AAAAa~mnAt |