davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington times., 1922-06-04
DISCUSSING AGED wHEEZEs

A marvellous coincidence COM
pels a group Of your readers to
request you to discuss in your
inimitable column the origin Of
that aged wheeze about the per-
spring cop who found a dead horse
on a street with q long name
which he could not spell and who
dragged II around to q street Of
q short name that he could spell
In making his report.
vERITAS.
II any Of our readers wish to
enlighten us on this all right.
Cops, though, are human and not
all Of them can spell correctly.
We saw a note recently that a
Washington cop gave a young auto
driver he had held up for falling
to observe q signal. It was ad.
dressed to his police station and
directed the station to "soke w.
The Washington times., 1922-06-04
NUT ADDRESSES.

f.. NUT ADDhEOoHo.
( Here are two nutty addresses
on letters to H. and s. which
washington postmen unraveled:
"BILL; NOT THE
KING OF swATS,
BUT THE
KING OF NUTS,
CITY"
ELL PRICES
FUN SHOP,
Voteless Washington,
.y ID. @.
The Washington times., 1922-06-04
PUT UP YOUR HAMMER.

with YOUR hand are do fikewiss,
ANY one can be . knocker,
Any one can criticise.
Cultivate tho boosting habit,
Though Il hurts your fsce 70 smiie'
At the start it may TO swkward,
But you'll get IL after whne:
Giving O bogus check for out.
Iawed whislxey Is no crime, but IT'S
n rotten trick TO play on an honest
bootlogger. RUFUS.
Every evening, Wilmington daily commercial., 1922-12-06
COLDS THAT
DEVELOP into
PNEUMONIA

Chronic coughs and persistent colds
lead TO serious lung trouble. You can
stop them now. with Creomulsion, an
cmulsifled creosote that is pleasant to
take. Creomulsion Is a new medical
discovery with twofold action: II
soothes and heals the inf'amed mem
branes and kills the germ.
or all known drugs. creosote is rec
ognized by the medical fraternity as
the greatest healing agency for the
treatment Of chronic coughs and colds
and other forms Of throat and lung
troubles. Creomulsion contains. in ad-
dition 10 creosote. other healing ele-
ments which soothe and heal the in
tlamed membranes and stop the ir-
ritation while the creOsote goes on
to the stomach. is absorbed into the
blood. attacks the scat OF the trouble
and destroys the germs that lead &c
consumption.
Creomulsion is guaranteed satisfac.
| ory in the treatment OF chronic
'oughs and colds. bronchial asthma
,atarrhal bronchitis and other form,
Il throat and lung diseases, and /,
'Xcelleut for building up the system
ifter colds or the flu. Money refunded
any cough or cold. no matter oi
now long standing. is not relieved
,fter taking according 20 directions
Ask your druggist. Creomulsion Co
| atlanta, Ga.-(Adv)
Every evening, Wilmington daily commercial., 1922-12-06
Sandman Story.
by Abby Philips Walker.
Copyright. 1922. by the Wheeler
Syndicate. Inc. ~. Y.
THISTLE DECLARES
HERSELF QUEEN

In field by the side Of the road
one morning in summer n purple
thistle tossed its head. ooh" exclaimed
the buttcrcups and daisies, IF there isn't
that horrid coarse thistle growing in our
field"
Even Dandclion, who never was
known to feel proud, shook his bright
head and said, IL should think there
would he room enough in the road for
YOU, Thistle. Why do YOU come to the
field where Daisy rcigns ms queen?
You are so common We really had rather
YOU would not stay"
The daisies and buttcrcups nodded
To show that they quite agreed with
Dandclion. and twisted about on their
stems as il they scorncd the company
Of purple thistle.
"Ho, no." laughed Thistle. Queen,
do YOU say? Daisy is queen here, is
she? That is very funny, my friends.
for queen should bc well protected,
and what has Queen Daisy that will
protect her from being carried OFF,
None Of them knew SO no one replied
and Thistle went on in scornful
voice. II am well fitted to he Queen. T"
she said; purple ! wear and E, do
queens. ! have an army To protect me
Every evening, Wilmington daily commercial., 1922-12-06
REDED|CATE TRINITY
LUTHERAN Church
Appropriate Exercises to be
Held Next Sunday. With
Prominent Speakers.

on January -. 1906. six mon inter-
.wted In organizing a Lutheran Church
across the Rrandywinc met in the A.
q. 4. w. Nan at Ninth and Market
streets 10 discuss the feasibility OF such
project.
Ae result cf the efforts OF these
men a permanent organization was
effected and a constitution adopted on
Palm sunday, April s. 1906. and the
name Holy Trinity Evangelical I.uth-
.ran Church was adopted by the new
congregation. The name was TO mem
orialize the name OF the First Church
~ the First City q the First State.
which was Holy Trinity Evangelical
Lutheran Church. known at the pres
cnt as Old Swedcs.
Two months later Rev ]. II. Main.
II u. accepted call 20 become pastor
and plans were laid for the locating
~ a suitable site upon which 10 erec;
a place Of worship.
The 81 upon which the present cdi-
ace now stands. at rwenty-third and
Madison streets. was given 10 the
congregation by Samuel II. Baynard
on September 3. 1906. and a temporary
chapel was erected In which TO wor-
ship
The congregation soon oHgrew those
quarters and the first unit e n stone
church waA constructed. Three years
ago &. became evident that larger
quarters were necessary and a second
unit - the building was started. The
construction of this unit has been
.necessarily slow because the greater
portion Of the work has been done BY
the members of the church In after
working hours.
Last July the last lap In the bulldlns
program was reached when the finish
ing touches were put on the new uni
and the old unit rearranged and reno
waited. which included the refrescoins
Of the walls and ceiling. the laying O.
hardwood floors and a new carpet
tho installation OF n new lighting sys
tom and an adequate heating system
and tho installation 4 n $4,000 MOlle
pipe organ.
The church has been served by nv
pastors. Rev. Samuel Evarlstus Vic
kcr has been pastor since November !
1920. The various ORGANIZATIONS O
tho church are very active and IN
future % tke congregation - mos
promising
The celebration of the rededlcatio
or the church will be held on SUNDAY
December 10. AZ II a. m. p. m. an
y. m. with appropriate services. Th
preacher az the morning service W.
BE- Rev. J. Chantry Hoffman. d. d
Superintendent Eastern District {
The BOARD - Home Missions OF N
United Lutheran Church OF America
Rev. Marion g. Richard. pas;cr OF IN
Frs; Lutheran Church IN Coll.nsdal
"a, and presiden; % the Ph!ladeiphi
Conference % the East Penneylvani
SYNOD VIII hc preacher AZ the aSte!
noon service. The address at IN
aver'rg service will be delivered b
Rev. u. Burt Smith. u. d. fe!d secre
tarv or the Parish and Church Scho,
bosri % the United Lutheran Chur-
IN America. The public - cordial
invited 20 participate With ere concre
sse~r sr -Nss. services
Every evening, Wilmington daily commercial., 1922-12-06
STATE DEATH RATE.
Government Report shows About the
Same as Year Ago.


According to figures which were an
nounced yesterday by the Department
Of Commerce the death rate for Della
ware for the first six months in 1922
,s almost the same as the rate for the
same period in 1921, the birth rate for
the state shows a slump according to
the figures.
There were go deaths in April. May
and June, 1922, as compared with $50
deaths for the same three months the
year before. In the same period this
year there were 1.l46 births, while for
a corresponding period in 1921 there
were 1,2si births.
According 10 the report or the De
partment OF Commerce. the figures
gathered so far this year indicate n
lower birth rate and a higher death
rate for 1922 as compared with III,
preceding year.
For all the states compared thc
average death rate was 1876 in 1922 as
compared with IL per thousand in
1921. Delaware, according 10 the re-
port. was considerably higher thar
the average. The state Of Maine had
the highest mortality rate for the yeal
with rate Of Is, and the state o
| Idaho. with rate Of SO had the low
est figures.
The highest birth rate was showi
! by the state Of North Carolina whicl
had for the first six months Of tn
year an average Of 30 babies per thou
sand Of population. Vermont. with Is.
per thousand had the lowest brit
rate. Delaware again is considerahl
below the average birth rate for IN
country
Every evening, Wilmington daily commercial., 1922-12-06

bc from many things. never sur
render and here ! stay until autumn
and go sailing away on wonderful
journey just as queens should do.
$50 you may call your daisy queen
if you like but | am the real queen Of
the fields or any place ] choose 10
grow, and II any one dare 90 come
near me will quickly show him. I
am n queen, by nigh. which makes IL
right, for me at least"
All the daisies turned their heads,
the buttcrcups lowered theirs and poor
Dandeion crouched closer 20 the
ground. There was nothing 10 he said
Thistle was queen wherever she chose
10 bloom and the other field flowers
could turn away their fees IL they
liked. Prickly Thistle cared not at all.
She was queen and no one dared try
TO make her move away.
And n ere she sat all summer on
her prickly throne and watched the
Others carried of 10y merry children
who came to gather them, TO wither
and bc thrown away.
"No one darcs touch me" said
Thistle as she tossed her purple head
flowers may come and flowers may ~
but the Queen stays until the end ol
rsummer Long live the quecnW
Every evening, Wilmington daily commercial., 1922-12-06
EDUCATIONAL MOVIES.
Delaware schools Being Shown In
Local Film Production.

An interesting feature Of Education
Week is the film on Delaware rural
schools which is being shown each
afternoon and evening at the Savoy
Theatre. The pictures Were taken last
summer by the county supervisors
and although the picture has appeared
elsewhere, II is the first showing in
This city.
The opening pictures show a field
day held last spring in Frazer Field.
Newark a health parade Of school
children is shown, followed by the
games and sports on the field. The
large group OF children whose atten-
dance was over 90 per cent are pic
tured.
The Sussex schools are well present
I'd. exter.ors and interiors Of tho
Laurel and Lewes schools being
shown. as well as the first model
rural school 10 he erected ny loca
Initiative. which is located al Shockley
Every evening, Wilmington daily commercial., 1922-12-06
Velour Sofa Pillows
some of gold cloth
SPECIAL

Restful is right for gift like this beauty its first
name and the last word in economy for these pillows
are specially priced. Damask trimmed. And 50
many shapes that Euclid himself could not have
described them.
Every evening, Wilmington daily commercial., 1922-12-06

the first consolidated school. Lord
Baltimore. and the community school
at Providence. a county field day at
Georgetown is shown. with its open
ing parade. physical examinations. eX-
hibits of work, and sports. The state
championship hall team Of Selbyville
is shown. and n military drill at Del
mar. In addition 10 the schools, there
are views Of banks in Sussex. orchards
of $4,000 trees. and strawberry fields
i'm Sussex, which produces more of
this fruit than any other county in
the country.
A Kent county field day IL also out
lined in detail, emphasizing the physi-
cal fitness OF the school boys and girls
Every evening, Wilmington daily commercial., 1922-12-06
Candlesticks and China

Mentioned breath they opposite
earth and both make lovely gfand because they're both equally
beautiful
The CHINA from JapanA touch the Orient pleasing the e
graceful and rage-chotoae and fruit and sand
wh celery and others that clear beyond the comprehension
Of a man.
The CANDLESTCKS-Br descrbedfOr the XnaS shopper
mahoganyea poly chrome eafed electrically treated
mahogany fnsh-S, and l2-inoh Scores Of patterns
Every evening, Wilmington daily commercial., 1922-12-06
West Happy Workers.

The Christmas meeting o. the
Happy Workers Missionary Society
% West Presbyterian Church will he
held on Saturday. a. 8 o'clock. in the
sunday school room. Miss Elizabeth
smith Will have charge % the pro
gram, which Will be followed by n
social hour. AL OF the children az the
church are invited 70 attend.
Every evening, Wilmington daily commercial., 1922-12-06

and no do Queens"
This was too much. "An srmy7"
Who're is itY" inquired Dandclion.
My stout, sharp pricklcs, to bc
sure" replied Thistle pcrtly. "You
do not see me bothered by people pull
ing me from my place and carrying
me of
Every evening, Wilmington daily commercial., 1922-12-06
To Give Gard Party.

a oa,d party viii be given tonor-
row nisht commencing az o'clock
which Will be given by the Social Ser
vice Committee of the Washington
Heights Century Club in the club
rooms. Mrs. Joseph 4. wickersham
a. chairman % the committee.
Every evening, Wilmington daily commercial., 1922-12-06

tho church on NEXT Tuesday evening.
AZ n later date the Hanover Wonsen's
League will also give Christmas
play
Every evening, Wilmington daily commercial., 1922-12-06
pIny nj Hanover.

The Young Peoples Dramatic Club
OF Hanover Presbyterian Church VIII
give Christmas party and play az
Every evening, Wilmington daily commercial., 1922-12-06

"No one darcs touch me, not even
the cows though for that matter none
Of you are much bothered that way
But attract more bees and butterflies.
than any of YOU and am not both
cred by insects crawling over me and
that is more than any Of YOU can say.
II am protected as queen should
The Morning Tulsa daily world. [volume] (Tulsa, Okla.) 1919-1927, 1922-09-24
sAPULPA

Mrs william g. Louis vaa
n guest In the home uf hr ana N-a Uugh
ffarNny over SUNDAY AfrF jackson wac
formerly Miss gophla Armsn. librarian st
the Carnegie libtary hero
Mrsdamea IS o. suyefa ". I. NIIsr.
T. 4 Cnarer Hrf tsrss Mas s5fsffalnsf
ON Thuraisv 4f'rrroar 90 the home Of the
latter. with a SILVER tea
Nilss Marguerite Thuups lcft Sunday
nIett .1r Goiftey 800. tl eufsr Monticello
Mr srd Mrs Marry A. Anarewa and iit
ue daughter Mary T.i returned home
Monday from summer lr Michigan. ,Ho.f
former home
Mis- GLADYS rlaruput entertained com
rlImeutaty 40 a uumt.r ~ tho tfIoI IHuus
aifIs. Win " siurbs- ulriv saturday 'riant
founs.d bv an .arlv flotntrg Iifs aud
rlarpoDt was .aglatuT ly Mira non o.
vinson NO eatauling hospiiaiiy ot Nrsos
RUN uHhIuau ouwe wa.For tma
Grigsby
rIr vfIs..ns ..,4.elrk clHa rrff rs
firr, meeting o., ,hs season on Fr.iag aft.
crnaon AZ .he home of Nts HHUey 100
Ehst Thompson yuer, a uII ne.uatnHI. ID.
va los rtioIi.n.s .,o sue.ra N ,U,
afternoon were Nfa Cut.s ant Mrs K,a
Ur. ~ -,..a,i,ta. .I. l..i.., ..t..I b
ins vUl D., hsia ON tho nrst Friday uHH
Mrs g4ff.r "a hostess
Nrs 4, o. Taylor offended very informal
hospitality to o. group o.. a.snls Y1 Ihufs
tav afternoon IH farewell 10 her sister
Nra i w parFrr who dauarfsd Friday
B4oruirp Tor non home ln FApette,lI. ARK
Nr and Mra s. w. Moore were called
to TULSA Thursday morning 90 the bedside
az their daughter Nra Low wilson who
"a. very low sitter on operation Iu tho
Mouuinlsido hospital Mise ruth sio0re
sister ~ tho aick woman. who ia teaching
.,baol I'm hiUuckah arrived home friday
Mrs Charles Gussei and sou Donald re-.
turned Friday tp their home Ia Tulsa after
r wrpfA visit with Ms HuHsags Sister.
NrH Zoo GnnhIu and Mr gambUI
Eaatln q Wo,fnrth. wife and baby Of
wichita. Kan. are hero FOR t1TtnlEhts
yis!t ~!'h the formers sgat Ar= n f..
FtHEF Mr Woiffarth ~ employed on the
wichita beacon.
j 4 Lawrence ana son Robert Lawrence
OF oklahoma City are guests ~ friends
here. the lstter iH being entertained In the
home of hdelbett Trottor, a fellow stu-
dent nt Annapolis naval bcademy.
REV NJ. r. lnErsham arrived home
Thurtlay from his old home a. InErohnm.
ili. where he has been visiting Tor several
weeks
Mr.. and Mrs. Earl Foster returned home
Thursday after several days visit with
relatives In Chandler
The Young WomnnH class 90 the First
Methodist Church met for tho first FAN
rosglon on Wednesday niFht with Mrs
Crawford, A. the paraonsRe OfncerH
The Morning Tulsa daily world. [volume] (Tulsa, Okla.) 1919-1927, 1922-09-24
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down rom NiNNnH' .'. '.' ...
Phillips County herald., 1922-08-31
sAwousr STORY

? ". Davenport. professor Of poll
ticsl science q, Hamilton College. at
Clinton. y. T. once made a speech
before the American Newspaper
Publishers Association After SPEAK
ing OF the newspaper =. an organ Of
democracy. fraternity and equality.
Prof Davenport concluded with this
parable:
Once there vas a country news.
PAPER man xho mixed sa~dnst With
the meal he fed his chickens He
iheasht they would nerer kno< the
difference. B.; they got even. when
ne cane 10 set the eggs. half the
b-ood h1.ched vere vootpecksrs
whs'soever a newspaper sowe,h.
that shall Il also reap.
Phillips County herald., 1922-08-31
Lakeside News

Mr.. Ed Considine and mother and
brother left Tuesday FOR tour
through the mountains.
Fred Noyes returned from his trip
TO the North park country one day
this week He liked the country so
well that they have decided to move
there in the near future
Mr.. and Mrs. Paul Hubert and
family returned this week from a
short outing at Wray.
Mrs. Asher Uphouse returned home
Friday morning. after spending z
week with her parents. Mr.. and Mrs.
Miell.
Mr. Evert Rowe has been cleaning
and decorating the Lakeside school
house this week.
Miss Mabel Walters of Shicklsy.
Nebr.. came "Wednesday 10 spend
couple of CT weeks with Mr.. and
Mrs c. L. Bredweil and family.
Mrs VIII Stevens called on hs-
sister. Mrs. ". C CriichIoE. Thurs
day afternoon.
Mr.. and Mrs. Mel and Vernon
took Sunday dinner with Mr.. VIII
Stevens and family. Mrs. A J.
Crifchlow called in tire afternoon.
Mr. Frank Hcls;lger of Sh;ckley.
Nebr.. come Saturday 10 visit a few
davs At the B-edwell nome.
There was no Sunday school az
Lakeside Sunday on account OF clean
ing and repairing the school house.
V. c. Critchlow's Tisited at FAX
tun Sunday afternoon
Phillips County herald., 1922-08-31
THE
C.. B. & @. r. r.

the Vests nos; dependable rail-
road. operating s1ss miles % road
IN the II ereat ~e4lth-prodneirs
states between the Grea; Lakes an
TIE Rocky Mountains. wants ueiiAp-
pearinE nen Of experience for Der-aa-
rcn; positions a; points sn iiiino's
Wisconsin. Iowa. Nissouri and Ne
brssta. where the working conditions
are pieaszn; and desirable
yaehiriss soiiernsfsrs and black
r-ri;hs. -ec per hcsr:
A ssr helpers for these crafts. t1e
per boar
Passenger car ozrr.n,crs and repair.
srs. 7ec Per ho1r.
Freigh, csr carp-r;srs a-d rsp4ircrs.
&c per hour.
To replace faen On strike ssainr; de.
cislon q tss Unitsd State. Railroad
Labor Bozfd
Ysanr men who hare fnissei sheir
farm or Other ~ork - ths sezsoa
should sply now sor Positions as hip
srs r. tas car s-i iooornotiFe dsps-;.
rnou,a uhefr faefsta-inaa Hrrs uiH
sraa ehsiie them to rrsiifF fzr -.
siiluns rzftnr higher ssFes
For fsrtarr raffieli4fa snf ffsrtro-
fsfiqr. Il Hcoepfed call oa o. write
sfarisr weshsrie. G. 3 = q r n
sHEsfrss wyc,isc
Phillips County herald., 1922-08-31
NO rHRlLLs BARRED

Reports state that in the way OF
thrills nothing is barred in Bar
Nothin'." Fox photoplay which win
be at the Peerless next Saturday.
No, not even a barroom scene-that
favorite centre of villianous activity
and righteous wrath in the yester-
year Of Western ranch life and ro-
nance.
Buck Jones. who has been rising
steadily in the favor of the picture
fans. is the star. and he is said to
present some sensational work in
Bar Nothin'r that is unusual, even
for him.
Ruth Renick is the leading lady.
She is the sister of sickly English
man in the party. and the object of
Buck Jones affections Miss Renick
lis charming little actress. and she
should prove an excellent foil for the
strenuous star.
Phillips County herald., 1922-08-31
MINOR MUSINGS

Ths proper study OF womankind
also Is n.sE-
Every married man longs some day
TO BE allowed TO eat the things he
wishes without being told what he
ought to eat
There is nothing less so than :
bathing beauty that isn't
4 crooked man can get a new
slant On life BY going straight
-chlaren are 30 much troubIe. =
iired parents often say. but they
shounld consider ho~ much trouble
parents are 20 their Children
TIE movies are not 50 bad as they
are pictured
yos csn tel by the way 10; Q,
folks &C; that they think ;hs biblical
injunction. Be ye also perfect was
mean; h,r somebody else
Then there IS the rnzn vho asks
ycu for advice so be can argue With
you ard show Jon zhsre you are
wrong
nis a mystery TO Amos. any nan
o. moderate means how he manages
10 nee, his bills
one beautiful thing about country
life IS ;ha; !; never Is Necessary 70
70 psenlcfing.
Phillips County herald., 1922-08-31

DAYS with costs OF court, and also
the pleasure Of spending said thirty
days, not in cell, but at work on
the county roads. Franks was
charged by his son of beating him
about the face during an argumeu,
over some crops that they both had
interests In.
(Hsxtun Herald)
Roy Sutherland and family were
over from Hoiyoke Sunday. visiting
with friends for the day.
Haxtun and community has suf-
fered severe loss through hail this
season. but regardless Of the hail q
large crop is being harvested. Corn
Is ine this year. A light shower fell
Sunday evening which, means much
for a plentiful yield. Considerable
smut has showed through the corn.
especially since the hail. but all are
optimistic for good corn crop.
Clarence Waters. held on a charge
OF the murder OF Deputy Sheriff 3.
J. Wilson on May %. was taken 70
Fort Morgan jail Friday by police
fatrolman James Kerr. who is now
on his vacation. Waters failed 10
obtain the bond of'sio.oeo which was
reonired By Justice A. ". Warren
when Waters was bound over TO the
Phillips County herald., 1922-08-31

The main trouble with the world
Is that there are so many human
beings in IT.
4 grssshopper hops without know
ing where il Is going. A lot OF men
are grssshoppers.
Phillips County herald., 1922-08-31
FROM OUR EXCHANGES
lsteriins cemoerat)

Excavation was started on new
addition to the Burlington shops this
week. Extensive Improvements are
being made and a new building will
be erected that will enable them to
take care of twice the number Of
engines as the old shops.
Joe Franks, a Russian living near
Atwood. who was arrested and
charged with assault and battery by
his son. Joe Franks, jr.. was tried in
Justice CT the Peace Kinzie's court
Wednesday morning and given thirty
Phillips County herald., 1922-08-31
NOTICE

Notice is hereby given that the
Board Of County Commissioners o..
Phillips County. Colorado. will meet
as Board o. Equalization az The
Office OF the County Clerk, IN Eol.
yoke. Colorado. on September 5. 6
and :, 1922, for thu purpose Of equal
izing the assessment Of ;hs several
taxpayers Of the county. And also
that they viii NEE, :; the oncs O.
the County CLERK CT September Is
and 20. 1922. for the purpose OF hear
ing complaints from taxpayers whose
assessment has been changed
rated at Hoiyoke. Colorado. this
lth day Of September. A D. 1872
REN c. EVANS.
County CLERK. Philips County Colo
Phillips County herald., 1922-08-31

district court Waters is said to be
tabercular and is recovering from
gunshot wounds inflicted in the fight
in which the onhcer was killed. The
local jails are not suitable for his
confinement.
Phillips County herald., 1922-08-31

1t is en- open question whether
more men who hare trouble at the
c.1ce take their spite out on the fam
ny. than men who have trouble zt
home take ii out on the once help.
Phillips County herald., 1922-08-31

Ms Marion Walker and darsh,er
Alice q BEpckteld. No. who have
oeea visiting Mrs. Walkers sls;er.ln.
las. Mrs. A wilsoa. lef for Denver
iharsdAy afternoon TO vtss; relatives
Phillips County herald., 1922-08-31

WE WILL BE CLOSED FROM
1880 UNTIL AFTER THE RACES
EVERY CAY OF The PHILLIPS
COUNTY FAiR-eAIscE MARKET.