davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-04-07
A CHANGE OF AIR.
By Grace Garfield.
Copyright, 1922, by Wheeler
Syndicate, NnGN

SYNDICATE, NnCA
DO you realize" Anne's tone
was tragic, as though she were re
cording the obsequies of her las
earthly friend, that 1 have never
I in all the II years of my life, been
out of New England% ' She
brought from the closet a large
scale map of the United States, and
placed it upon her fathers desk, Iii
rectly under his gaze. Then seiz-
ing his broad palm, she forced him
| to illustrate her remarks by coin-
! parison of relative sizes.
| Look at New England" COM
manded Anne, and then look at
the rest of the country. How do
you expect me to be liberal minded,
as you say you want me to be, when
1 have always been confined with
in the limits of five States-and lit
tie, measly ones, too" She finished
in deepest scorn
Her father protested feebly. He
was too much astounded by the
sudden onslaught to be able to sum
mon his forces for an adequate de-
fence.
THE New England States are the
best in the Union" he declared
loyalty. Better than all the rest
put together"
ooh, of course" cried Anne.
everyone thinks his own state
better than the rest. But that
needn't keep him out of the others.
How am to appreciate New Eng
lands wonders uSth1,,+ zao;r ~ :
rest of the country?' And now
came her real grievance. This
place is so-provincial" 1t would
seem, from her tone, that the one
word provincial pIumbed the low
est depths Of undestrabflity.
People are the same every
where, my dear" came her moth
er's gentle voice from the other
side of the room.
Anne was almost reduced to
tears. 1t was the old argument. and
she had no proper reply. How could
she know whether people were the
same everywhere? She had never
seen any except New Englanders.
oh, / know they aren't" she
sobbed. I'D die if I thought there
were a hundred million people in
the country as dull as this old
town. 1t takes only a part of a day
to get to New York, but I'd know
the difference in a minute. WHY. I
couldn't help noticing even the
change in atmosphere outside of
New England"
Her father and mother exchanged
glances over her head. Obviously.
the only way to convince this re-
bellious daughter was to let her
see for herself. Her father finally
spoke.
Il don't feel that I can afford a
long trip just now, daughter" he
said, but supposing we take, say,
days ride from here, going west
ward, and you and your mother can
stay at some town for a week. Then
you can Judge how different people
are in the wild west
Anne was a little resentful at the
teasing. and she was not at all sat
isied with the proposed compro-
mise; still it was something, and
in her heart of hearts she was
forced to confess that the conces-
The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-04-07

, such physical condition, by means
of these exercises, that you can do
the 18th movement as much as 10
times regularly along with the rest
of the better metabolism symphony.
with nothing but q bracing, uplift-
ing, delightful, after effect, you
may reasonably jolly yourself that
you are fairly fit.
QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS.
Physiology Straying Far Afield.
A little school girl wrote me a
delightful letter in the course of
which she said that her class in
physiology discussing the question
of pimples wished to know why
pimples come only on the face of
boys and girls from 10 to 16 years
of age, etc., and in reply I observed
that they don't and then l remark
ed that such a question scarcely
fell under the head of physiology
anyway.
Now comes the little girls teach
er protesting that my reply was
unfair.
Maybe physiology has been con-
siderably revised and enlarged since
1 went to school, but 1 cannot be-
ieve it has been extended to in
clude pathology too.
The trouble with the "physiol-
ogy" taught in the common schools
is that it is little dash of this and
that and almost everything mag
Unable save only the functions of
the human body. For example,
what does the boy or girl gradual
ing from school know about him
self or herself? Nothing to speak
of. The schools have not yet pro-
crossed far enough to teach the
pupil to know himself-it isn't nice,
as any ignorant taxpayer can tell
you, and so it isn't done.
School physiology" would be a
fine joke were it not for the regret
table waste of time it causes so
many little boys and girls and the
mass of useless and misleading in
formation it temporarily cutters
their brains with.
tuberculosis IN MIX.
Do tuberculosis germs pass from
cows in their milk? Should all
milk be boiled before drinking?
W. G. T.
Answer-If the cow has tuber-
culosis, as a large number do, the
fact may be ascertained by the tu-
berculin test. A tuberculous COW
is likely to eliminate tubercle ba-
cilli in the milk. Milk from cows
or herds that have not been tuber-
culin tested should be boiled five
minutes or else pasteurized Cheat
ed up to 140 degrees F., held at that
temperature 20 minutes, then cool
ed. This, according to most au-
thorities, is certain to destroy tu-
bercle bacilli and other disease
germs, though Metchnikof said it
could not be wholly depended, on
TO do so and advised boiling five
minutes instead. OF course certi-
fed milk is pure and requires no
such treatment.
The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-04-07
The Daily Short Story

sion was more than she had hoped
for at this time.
1t was, therefore, with no misgiv-
Ings at alA, but with much citation
at the prospect Of seeing even a bit
of the world, that Anne set out with
her family on their days automo
bile trip. 1t was long after dar
| when they arrived at their desn
IA ton, SO Anne was unable to see
the name of the railroad station
past which they drove. The next
day, however, she learned from the
landlady of their modest boarding
house that the town was called
Eastman. 1t was on this day, too
that Anne began to see life.
She was careful not to mention
New England in any way, or to join
in conversation which might lead
up to the subject. She lived in
mortal fear lest someone discover
that she was a native of that pro-
vincial section, and she tried in
| every way, in her speech, manner
and air, to approximate the attitude
of those about her, whom she
greatly admired.
For it had turned out that her
mother had two or three lifelong
friends in Eastman, and they cor
daily welcomed the bright, pretty
daughter. Indeed, after the first
night, she and her mother were
lodged at the home of one of the
lifelong friends. They gave par
ties for Anne, and dances, and
bacon bats, and seemed to vie with
each other in seeing that she had a
good time. 1t was the most glor-
lously ecstatic week that Anne had
ever spent, and for seven delicious
days she entirely forgot the exist
ence of New England.
Perhaps her enjoyment was not
due SO much to the admiring atten-
lions of her mothers friends, or to
the gay clan of young people
which received her gladly, as to the
specific attentions of one Jack
Peters, who was altogether the
most delightful young man imagin-
able. He could talk nonsense in a
!! most convincing manner, but he
also coldd, upon occasion, con-
verse with great gravity and ser
iousness. He and Anne were agreed
upon the really important things
in life, and they settled, in their
hours of intimate conversation.
many problems which had long
been troubling the world at large.
With the deepest regret, Anne
rose on that last morning, and real
lied that the time had come for her
to leave Eastman-and Jack. The
blush and the smile which she be-
slowed upon her mirror at this
thought, however, might lead one
to suppose that she rather expect
ed this last devastating not to be
final one.
The two young people managed
to get few minutes together that
afternoon, just before it was time
for Anne to go. Her father and
mother were already in the car.
"Goodby, Jack" whispered Anne
shyly. Il like New York lots"
do your" Jacks tone was a lit
tie puzzled. But you have a soft
spot in your heart for our old New
England. haven't your" he asked
tenderfy.
Anne withdrew her hand. Our
own New England?" she stared at
him a moment. aghast. Then. slow
The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-04-07

" CHesIon VI NtlHNS 4he argus AhluE1s
Washington. D. e. Give full name An4
eturn postage. Be brief. Al inquiries al
70 each Individual. DO AbtenN0n HL4 v
while Subsistence might increase In
arfthmeticaI progression. For this
reason, he concluded that there
could be no permanent ameliora-
ton of the lot OF the poorer classes
@. What are love birds?
]. B. G.
A This is a popular name given
to many diminutive parrots Of var
ious genera and even of different
families. They receive their name
on account of the affection when
they display toward each other DoLl
in wild state and when connned
in cages.
@. Is it true that woman has
one more rib than man? B. v.
A. There are "A ribs in the nu-
man body. The common belief thal
a woman has one more rib than
man is erroneous.
@. Who discovered copper? How
did it come to be called by LnN
name? Z. B. ID.
A. Copper was discovered by tne
ancient Greeks in Cyprus, iIon
which the name copper is derived.
@. What is a geode stone?
c. N. B.
A. Goodies are rounded, hollow,
aggregates of mineral material O
! indurated nodules, either empty =
containing a more or less solid anu
free nucleus and having the eaVl'!
frequently lined with Crystals
They are sometimes called pr
tato stones" on account OF tAs-
size and shape. The name seems y
have been given them because tne!
are occasionally found filled VIZ
soft earthly ochre. Agate IS geolS
built up of concentTic layers V
chalcedony.
The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-04-07
Chr UnitthHtuttp
axxx lies MArs AEczEz<x KrFmHx.
DILL CARE
VINO pausrEns rn Usn.ovxS cUsA
sAMARKAND.

SAMARKAND.
hate to write "skinback",
To grovel I'm not fond;
: But If it will appease you,
Then make it Samarkand
You've spoiled a fond illusion.
For which you'll pay beyond.
But have struck my colors:
You're welcome-Samarkand
I've tried to argue on it;
I've threatened and I've fawne1.
The last words always with you,
So--damn iti--SamarkAnd.
I tried to hold my standard
Until at last 1t dawned
That Webster might be right, 80
From now it's Samarkand.
l think it sounds outrageous,
And you deserve the pond:
But still t would not convince yoe-
I'll stand for Samarkand.
P s.:
II this does not appease ys0-
My offering disdained-
There's nothing left to do then
But call it Samarkand.
But / have learned a lesson
And have been soundly panned.
1 never more will mention
That horrid S..
The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-04-07

O. When did the tricilor become
the flag of France? 7. P.
A. Marquis de Lafayette brought
about the adoption of the tricilor
in 1883.
q. Is Lowestoft china still made?
90.
A. The production of this cele-
brated blue and white china was
begun in Lowestoft toward the end
Of the 18th century, but it is no
longer made.
@. How wide. long and deep is
the Amazon river? w. r.
A. The Amazon river is 3,400
miles long, and is $50 miles wide
at its mouth. The river varies
greatly in lepth. on account of
foods. For $50 miles from its
mouth it is nowhere less than 80
fathoms deep.
@. Is kelp still being harvested
for its potash on the Pacific coast?
W. E. S.
A. The kelp industry. which grew
to Importance in California during
the war, is now memory, all plants
having closed down.
@. What is the Malthusian theo-
ry? G. S.
A. Thomas r. Nautilus, an Eng
fish economist, propounded the
thesis that population in all times
has tended to outrun subsistence.
He argued that population tended
to increase in a geometrical ratio,
The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-04-07

Mary L4aHdon Baker, a Chicago girl is gain
ing lot of newspaper notoriety by he I'M
usual social eapers. You may feel that Mary
isn't worth all the attention she is receiving
in the press. Perhaps she isn't but her SEN
sational conduct is. After ALL the newspapers
don't make the news. We foolish people do.
The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-04-07

James Hamilton Lewis, former Illinois SEN
ator, will attend the Genoa conference. And
he will not employ his pink whiskers to con-
ceaA his American identity, either.
Vt Us denied that Aenine, the Russian boA-
1 shevik leader, is suffering with cancer. Blu
Russia is
The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-04-07

ly, comprehension dawned on her.
Jack Peters," she demanded,
what state is Eastman in?"
why, you sweet child, in Massa-
chusetts, of course, where else %
Jack laughed.
The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-04-07

Actress appearing in Chicago claims she mas
been paying $500 week for her temporary
residence The sad part OF this statement is
that it will be believed by every silly girl with
stage ambitions.
The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-04-07

Disappearance of eight Chicago girls on
one day is attributed by police to spring fever.
1t will likely be found that most of them car
ried copies of the latest story on Howl Got
Into the Movies"
The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-04-07

A friend of Jack London says he has been
in communication with the spirit of the dead
author and that Jack is complaining that he
misses his daily libation Of liquor. The friend
doesn't mention the address of Jacks spirit
The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-04-07

A Chicago newspaper sent an expert to the
Los Angeles moving picture colony in search
of the most beautiful woman in the world. And
it is Just as likely as not that she lives right
here in Rock Island
The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-04-07

Congress has passed bill providing Tor
the deportation of aliens who violate the pro-
hibition law If American citizens were IN
cluded the bootlegging Industry would quickly
end in this country.
The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-04-07

1t is proposed to eliminate the word obey
from the marriage ceremony of one OF the
churches Might as well. 1t doesn't many any
thing, anyhow.
The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-04-07
FRIDAY, APRIL q, 1922.

The records show that new citizen is dorm
in New York every nine minutes- bul tnde l.
a sucker born every minute.
The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-04-07

Noted animal collector says he found the
most beautiful women in the world In the
Dutch Indies Must have been Americans who
were wintering there.
The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-04-07

AND there as the Arab remarked to the
desert as he folded his tent and s. s. a., you
are. Yet we can't forbear pointing out an
other error committed by C. E H. when he
tells US, 1.-The last words always with YOU
Doesn't he know we're married?
Why, Nina! We're Surprised.
[From the Peoria Journal
Miss Nina Sherbine of Canton has re-
ceived word from Minneapolis of the
marriage Saturday of her son, Howard
S. Sherbne, to Miss Elma Rosencrantz
thing is to have tiny watch set in the handle
of miladys fan-"to time your firtations"
The American fapper probably will substitute
a speedometer.
The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-04-07
Oh, Girls! Lets Have a Paiama Party.

ords to that effect
Oh, GirisI Lets Have a Paiama Partyt
(Anothsr "tashi0n nots"S
Chicago April Ga shop here is tea-
turing black silk paiamas. They are
much more gay than patamas in colors
for the black is heightened by embroid-
cry in purple, VermUIfoH and yellow
across the breast, down the back and
around the knees Further briIliance is
added by lonk silk fringe around the
ankles, the fringe repeating the enbroid-
cry colors. With the black paiamas are
worn silk slippers in some Of the gay
colors.
PREMIER CRAIG reports sighting the dove
Of peace lowering over Ireland. But does the
gentleman from Ulster know a dove when he
sees one?
SHAM.
Once a week
You are a changeling:
Crossing the threshold
OF man-reared temple
You go
1t is your spiritual wash-day
Swathed in your Pharisaie garments =
OF bigotry and hypocrisy
Careful draperies,
Worn with sanity smirk)
You march in state
To well-uphoistered pew
Where you kneel, monk-like
Mutterfng righteous prayers -.
coming from your lips,
These are indeed rare blasphemy,
Between your precisely -clasped fingers
Peep your greedy eyes
Sensuous, speculative
Seeking future prey
At nightfaH
You are done with masqueradinx:
On the morrow
The world finds you
Stalking the helpless,
AS usual.
Poor fool
Do you imagine
That by DOMINIC special manners
For Sunday prayers
You In any way deceive
Much less your God?
JAY G. sIGMUND.
CERTAIN of us read with apnreciation :.
scathing indictment like sham" In 49,
however, It is futile; for the eentrv A. ~,
II Is aimed have hides thicker than that al
legged to encase the much discussed n1esso-
saurus pieslo-
THE first page artist of the eaJeshnr,
should be awarded a banJ
painted. embroidered makeup rule for his
this: o 0an Deaf
ILLINOIS MINE OWNERS WILL REJEr~r
THE PARENTAL COMPLEX.
They tell me to my house has come
pretty little stranger,
But I'll not worry yet as Ions
AS don't have to change bar
RIO. in The Chicago Post.
FOR 10 minutes lady has been imnortnn-
ing US TO write last line and come on"
So there's only one thing to do.
R. E. MIG.
The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-04-07
SONNET CONTEST.

ENTERED by o. D. XII
To write line and make it end with PIG
Has driven me insane, in fact plumb BAT
Ty. I've worried SO to close this with a CAT
I've lost my hair. I'm bald. All. for a WIGi
I'll make the wigger shake nasty JIG
To furnish with garnish for my HAT.
I've got this far and now that nutty RAT
Must have its fling. Ho, hum, care FTGi
I'll just dash off the rest-Oh, whatta LIE,
Should turn a statues white to Russian RED
But l, alas, will cast the W. k. DIE
Then HE myself up to my little BED,
Perchance to dream Of printers brand of PIE
Twixt Nightmares I've acquired since I was
WE'D
THE services of the visiting nurse (take it
from the Marshalltown Times-Republican) are
ito be had without pay by those in straight
e1ed circumstances.
To them that hath it shall be given-or
words to that effect
The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-04-07
Argus Information Bureau

the
J.
to anon
The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1922-04-07

FoR 10 minutes lady has been importun.
ing us to write last line and come on"
So there's only one thing to do.
R M.C
The Monett times., 1922-09-22
WEST PRAIRIE

Mr.. and Mrs. R. r. Mccormick wera
shopping in Monett' Thursday.
Mr.. and Mrs. Joe Bauman visited
his father Sunday.
Mr.. and Mrs. G. w. Mcintosh were
in Monett Monday.
Mrs. Joe Mccormick and daughter
Frances were shopping in Monett FRS
day.
Miss Hazel Mccormick, Miss Mil
dred and Lucille Vogt are attending
high school in Monett.
Dewey Parker and son are baling
hay on Stones Prairie.
Mr.. Stark has been assisting Joe
Bauman cutting corn.
Mr.. and Mrs. f. D. Parker and son
Alvin made a business trip to Frei-
staff, Saturday.
Rev. Ed Brown is conducting
meeting at Ebenezer church, every
body is invited to come and assist in
the meeting,
II. w. Wallen is having his straw
baled
The Monett times., 1922-09-22
MONETT z. F. d. 3

Mrs. I. A. spilman' and Mr.. and
Mrs. Rice Woods and sons visited
Mrs. w. R. Russell Wednesday.
Several from this community at,
tended funeral services of Mrs. Bey-
mer at Kings Prairie church last
Monday.
Sam Fletcher has been on the sick
list threatened with typhoid fever but
is reported better.
Mr.. and Mrs. jim Mulkey were din-
ner guests of Mr.. and Mrs. Jim Nc
Cormick and family Sunday.
Mr.. aud Mrs. Earl Larkln spent
Sunday at the home of Witt jenkins
and family.
Mendon school was dismissed at
noon Friday. The teacher, Miss Bolin
was suffering from severe burn she
received few days ago, and was un-
able to teach.
Mrs. Florence Russell and sons
spent Friday night with her parents
Mr.. and Mrs. L. A. Spillman, who
live near Wentworth.
The Monett times., 1922-09-22
PURNELL-FREELAND

Mrs. Julia Freeland, of Monett, was
married at $50 o'clock, Monday even
ing, September IS, to Mr.. Thomas j.
Purnell, of Topeka, Kansas. Inc
ceremony was performed by DR.. j. D,
Shaddrick at the home of the bride,
5I1 Third street.
The ceremony was witnessed by Mr.
and Mrs. R. T. Bennett and Mr., and
Mrs. James Watson, of Peirce City;
Mr.. and Mrs. Will Counts, of Purdy;
Mrs. s. T. Clutter and Mrs. Frank
JONES'.
Mrs. Purnell has lived in Monet
for a number of years and is promlnl-
ent in church and lodge work. Mr.
Purnell holds responsible position
in the engineering department OF the
Santa Fe railroad with headquarters
at Topeka. They left Monday night
for months trip through the nortt
and east, and will visit Chicago
Pittsburgh, Pa, and other points IL
Pennsylvania, Washington, d. 9. anc
New York City. AS Mr.. PurnelPs po
sition occasions considerable travel
they will retain Monett as their home
which win be convenient to his terri
tory.
The Monett times., 1922-09-22
HELPFUL WORDS
From a Monett Citizen.

Is your back lame and painful?
Does it ache especially otter eXer-
tion?
Is there a soreness in the kidney
region?
These symptoms suggest weak kid
neys.
If so there is danger in delay.
Weak kidneys get weaker fast.
Give your trouble prompt attention
Doan's Kidney Pills are for weak
kidneys.
Your neighbors use and recommend
them. "a
Read this Monett testimony.
Mrs. j. B. Tyler, 400 Lincoln avenue
says: 81 have used Doan's Kidney
Pills off and on for years and know
that they are a good reliable remedy
When my kidneys We're out Of order
they caused me great deal of trouble
by their irregular action. My bacl
was weak and ached severely. al
ways get Doans' Kidney Pills whel
bothered this way for l know they cal
be depended upon and very shor
use strengthens my kidneys up i
good shape and removes the pain
from my back"
Price 6Oc, at all dealers. Don
simply ask for kidney remedy-ge
Doan's Kidney Pills the same tina
mrs. Tyler had. Foster Milburn Co
MFRS, Buffalo, N. Y.
The Monett times., 1922-09-22

that the members were bent on in
creasing state expenses and therefore
taxes. Nothing could be farther from
the truth. On the contrary in every
committee an attempt has been made
in the consideration of the problems,
to conserve the. interests of the tax
payers in every way possible. An
earnest eff )rt is being made to reduce
the expense of government and to
tighten the burdens of the taxpayers
If some Of the sections written by
the various committees with this END
in view are passed upon favorably by
the convention, the proponents feel
that they can go before the people
and promise an incalculabie saving to
the taxpayers if the constitution is
adopted All the expense Of the con-
vention, they contend, will be mere
trifle when compared with the annual
saving that will result.
The report of the Committee or
Taxation, the provisions of which
have been tentatively adopted, is be
ing written up for submission ant
final passage by the committee before
it goes to the convention. It will
probably be at least ten days before
this report comes into the convention
1t will contain some of the most i'm
portant provisions for consideration
by the members, and which may bt
among the most far reaching of an!
to be submitted in the constitution
when finally completed.
Many petitions are pouring in ask
ing for favorable action on the pro
posal regarding the reading of tn
, Bible in the schools. This provision
as has been previously stated, corle
to the convention from the bill o
rights committee where it received
tie vote, and so will be considered b.
the committee of the whole as
separate proposition, but if adopte
will be put into the bill of rights.