davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The West Virginian. [volume] (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1914-1974, 1922-12-21
HOULT


At a meeting OF the Workers
Conference Of the NJ. E. Sunday
school one evening last week, the
following officers were elected for
the ensuing year: Superintendent,
s. j. Smith: Assistant superInten-
dent, w. F. Hoult; secretary, Mrs.
Edna Huffman; treasurer, Mrs. s..
%. Cummings; librarians, Merl
Keller and Grace Hoult; Superin-
tendent missionary department,
Jas. D. Bowman: secretary-traas-
urer, Ellen Holbert: superinten-
dent temperance department, Ray
Bowman: secretary, Hazel Bow
man; organist, Mrs. Edna Huff
man; superintendent home de-
partment, Mrs. s. ]. Smith, super
intendeut Grade roll, Florence
Wiles.
1t was decided to introduce the
use Of graded lessons IN the Pri-
mary Cass, making two classes u.s.
ing the graded lessons.
Personals
Mrs, Newton Reese held a quilt
ins zee at her home yesterday. A
number OF neighbors gathered at
tue i.eese home for the affair.
John G. Bowman of Morgan
iowa is a gust OF his brother,
Jas. Il. Bowman.
Mr.. and Mrs, A. ]. Mcolvin and
daughter Betty Lee are guests Of
Mr.. aud Mrs. George Sperllng and
Mrs. Mcolvin's I1Cther, Mrs. s. J..
Smith. Mr.: McOlvin moved his
family from Fairmont to Akron,
Ohio, short time ago, but they
will reside here again in the near
future.
Mr. and MIS-. II. G. Harroud and
c!i,dron OF Preston County are
Eu"scs Of Mr.. and Mrs. D. E. VIII
sen.
The West Virginian. [volume] (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1914-1974, 1922-12-21
Sidelights
a MARROW ESCAPE.

A local man had quite an unusual
Christmas experience this week.
He is the proud father OF three lit
tie girls, one Just 5 months old.
The other day he went down
street and purchased for the two
older girls dolls that murmur
"Mama" when tilted Just right. In
order to allow Santa Claus TO func.
ton properly, he ordered the dolls
sent TO q neighbors, where Santa
Claus would get them the night be.
fore Christmas.
In some manner the delivery OF
the dollars bungled, and so while
the family was at luncheon yester.
day, the front door opened and a
delivery boy placed two packages
inside the door. He placed them
ut such an angle that
Mama, Mama came from the
two dolls In rapid succession.
Goodness me- said one Of the
children at the table, ''isu,t our III.
tie baby sister smart--only S
months old aud'she can say Mama, /.
Taking the needed cue, father
said TO mother: "That Is wonder.
full. ] guess che wants a drink OF
water" Then he left the table TO
The West Virginian. [volume] (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1914-1974, 1922-12-21

Ernest Mccoy Mrs y. w MI
son, Mrs. sue watson stoelSisy;
Mis-. w. q. watson. Nh. George
.. peddieord. Mrs. b. L. Butcher
Miss Minnie Mccoy. Mrs. walton
Miller. Mrs, H. l.. catlett. Aunt
Hat. Mrs, w. c. Cole, Mrs, Ed.
win Robinson, Mrs, q. F. Robert.
son, Mrs, Charles 3. Ward, Mrs.
b. F. Ramage, Miss Ida NJ. Wat.
son, Mrs, Arthur B. KoontE, Mrs.
a. B. Fleming, Jr., Miss Mary
Louise Oldham. Mrs. Murray
Diekerson, Mrs. John H. Rock,
Mrs. A. B. Scott, Mrs. Edith Frey.
Amos, Good Housekeeping, Mrs.
Daisy s. Piter, Mrs. H. s. Bev.
erley, Mrs. n. Annie NJ. Phil.
lips, Mrs. =. @. Bell, Mrs. R. r.
Burt, Mrs. John Henshaw, Mrs.
Harry Smith. Mrs. Mamie B. Hen.
shaw, Mrs. Clement L. Shaver,
Boston Cook Book, Mrs. j. E.
Watson, Jr., Mrs. Baird Mitchell,
Miss Maggie L. Watson, Mrs. Bss.
sic Henry (Mrs. G. ". Watson). .
Mrs. Laura D. Plekenpaugh, Mrs.
Emma Bainbridge, Mrs. Frank
Lyon Miss Louise Smith, Mrs.
David r. Tappan, Miss Louise
Rock, Mrs. 2. F. Robertson, Mrs.
Jeftries, Mrs. B. R. Blqckford,
Mrs. Guy Hartley, Mrs. A. j.
burlington, Miss North, Mrs. Fttz.
hugh Lee, Mrs. Able P. Upshur,
Mrs. George Pullen Peede, Mrs.
Arthur Martin, Mrs. @. E. Ward,
Mrs. Emma seigk, Mrs. Francis
3. Nichols.
The West Virginian. [volume] (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1914-1974, 1922-12-21

1t isN reported that there was one woman in
Fairmont last Christmas who purchased, wrapped.
and tied every single gift that she wished to
present, who sent out by parcels post every pack.
age that she wished to send to distant friends who
mailed every Christmas card and never forgot a
single person whom she wished to remember, who
got all her Christmas baking and cleaning done.
the house trimmed with greens. put dollar in
the Salvation Army kettle, gave dollar to the
Times Christmas fund, bought dollars worth
OF Red Cross Seals, and sat down on Christmas
eve with serene untroubled mind, But who was
she!
The West Virginian. [volume] (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1914-1974, 1922-12-21

Considering the temper of the Turk toward the
remaining Christian population in Turkey, it would
be wise move on the part Of the latter they
were to get out Of the country before being
chased out Thousands Of them are doing this
very thing and American vessels are daily packed
with these pitlful people The Stars aud Stripes
are beginning to have similar significance to that
of the white banner with the red cross in those
countries overseas. Americas dag is become re.
fuge and help wherever It waves.
The West Virginian. [volume] (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1914-1974, 1922-12-21
rHREE TEAMS AccEpr.

PASADENA, Calf, Dec. 21.-
Three college football teams will
see the University OF Southern Cal.
ifornla and Penn State football
teams clash here New Years Day
in the Tournament of Roses annual
East vs.. West gridiron clash. In.
Vitations have been accepted by the
football teams Of Pittsburgh, Con
zaga and Utah Agricultural Col
lege.
The West Virginian. [volume] (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1914-1974, 1922-12-21
to pay, but we did.

to pay, but we did,
,Iohn VnsetS HeSeF cease says
S
a.
one OF the West Virginia play.
straw nat; It was only about 20
degrees ABOVE zero.
80
We mean the temperature, not
Who knows-they may be going
to put on minstrel show en-
route.
Christmas sure does give us a
"strapping."
Hope Deacon slapapple gets
plenty OF good cider for Christ;
doing right WE'LL though.
Well get a blast from Manning.
ton for that one.
Italian Dictator Once an Editor
The West Virginian. [volume] (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1914-1974, 1922-12-21

That new sleeper service to Charleston has al.
most caused the public to shed tears Of gratitude.
Probably an excursion to Charleston would make
hit during the holidays There are hundreds OF
Fatrmonters who have never been in Charleston
but once aud then they were too tired, and hungry
and mad, to give the city an unbiased chance to
make good impression.
The West Virginian. [volume] (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1914-1974, 1922-12-21
RUFF STUFF

Another move is likely in the
SaDitol matter;
Pretty much Of chess game.
oa'y four days until Christmas.
pnn't give the ice man tins cold
shoulder.
Tho nutu have. a good :i.as no
doubt at a tackey dance.
All honest people are no. dead.
Conside rthe woman who t7un a
pocketbook with $4,000 few days
before Christmas and returned it
to the owner.
We know the inside stuff now on
why that Tlmss.west Virginiaa
bowling match was called of last
night. Pop Mapel had a banquet
We got q Christmas card yes.
terday with the postage due, but
we were glad to pay the costs.
Johnny Scott never expected us
The West Virginian. [volume] (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1914-1974, 1922-12-21
HAVE MARROW EscspE

CAYUGA, Dec .20-Five pris-
oners In the Haldemand County
jail had narrow escapes from be
ing burned to death today when
fire RACED the jail and courthouse
Flremen reached the men in the..
cells just in time.
The West Virginian. [volume] (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1914-1974, 1922-12-21

get the baby a drink" Incident.
ally he grabbed the packages con
tanning the dolls and rushed up
stairs to hide them securely.
Gee, what q narrow escape" no
remarked later to his wife.
The West Virginian. [volume] (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1914-1974, 1922-12-21
TWO BUILDINGS DESTROYED.

CINCINNATI. Dec. 21.-Fire OF
undetermined origin late last night
destroyed two OF four buildings
comprising the main plant Of the
Williamson Heater Co., situated in
Oakley, a suburb Of Cincinnati. The
loss was estimated at 100000.
The West Virginian. [volume] (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1914-1974, 1922-12-21

has lost some Of hers anyway"
Excused for the day." said the
Maid.
Thanks"
The West Virginian. [volume] (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1914-1974, 1922-12-21

The new freedom enjoyed By
Turkish women has caused In
creased exports Of lipstlcks from
the United States.
The West Virginian. [volume] (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1914-1974, 1922-12-21

people who are NOW squirntng under the question
ins Of tie proaeention. T6sre aIe few who act
differently under the circumstances.
The West Virginian. [volume] (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1914-1974, 1922-12-21
.Berton Bralsss Poem
DOESN'T d. THoueIaf

DOESN'T II, THOUGH
were born. and go on growing.
Through chlldhood's seasons glow
Ing,
And the world rolls on. AG
we ttlst, as lads and lasses
Till adolescence passes,
And the world folls ons
oh, the world rolls on,
From dawn to dark and trem dark
to dawn. NJ
We're. dull, or sad, or merry,
( We work, when necessary, "
And the world rolls on.
We have our time OF dreaming,
OF planning and Of schemins,
And the world rolls on;
we grow q little older, #
Our blood runs slower, colder,
And the world rolls on.
Yes. the world rolls on,
Night and day TIL the years are
gone
We boast Of our successes =
Or wall at our dlstresses,
And the world rolls on.
And yet there's fun in strlying,
In toiling and contrlvlng,
While the world rolls on;
We have our little furry, ''
Then laugh, "well, we should
worry,
Let the world roll ont"
Let the world roll on,
We can't argue either pro or con,
Well live life till IT'S over,
And then, beneath the clover,
Let the, world roll on!
Copyright, 1922 :
The West Virginian. [volume] (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1914-1974, 1922-12-21
THURSDAY EVENING. DnoEMBBR Al. 1e22.

Marietta College announces its intention Of dis
pensing education by radio. Correspondence
schools will probably have heart failure at the in
uoyation.
The West Virginian. [volume] (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1914-1974, 1922-12-21

Now see how you can mess It
up today-Gosh darn It!
As a soleful gift,Iwe suggest a
pair Of shoes.
The West Virginian. [volume] (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1914-1974, 1922-12-21
Go away, dull care, go away.

We don't mind sitting around a
coal fire, but how we hate to
drag In the coal and drag out the
ashes.
The West Virginian. [volume] (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1914-1974, 1922-12-21

Johnny Scott never o9pectet US
The West Virginian. [volume] (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1914-1974, 1922-12-21

One Of the West Virginia play.
ers started on the trip wearing a
straw hat. It was only about 20
degrees above zero.
The West Virginian. [volume] (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1914-1974, 1922-12-21

We mean the temperature, not
the hat.
The Washington times., 1922-09-25
WAYSIDE WISDOM
CCopyright. 1917
by S. E. kiser
| Don't Want to Go There Now.

HEAVEN must be extremely quiet,
III No disturbance over coal,
Not a chance to start riot
Or to help to save a soul;
No bootlegging, no home-brewing,
No rum runners to be caught;
All serene and nothing doing
If alPs true that we've been taught.
MO contention over borders
~ Separating little states;
No armed forces or disorders,
No men shadowed by their mates;
Not a Ku Klux Klan in action,
No disdain of sect or race.
Nothing but sweet satisfaction
Heaven, what a humdrum place!
MO crap shooting and no racing,
~ Not a single game of chance,
No girl brought to grief through placing
Faith in some smooth strangers glance;
No oppression and no cheating,
Not a gun and not knife;
No regret from over-eatirg-
How can angels stand the life!
MO old lady angels caring
N How the napper angels dress;
No old fat he angels tearing
Through distractions to success;
Not "Folies" girl pursuing
Any rich mans son and heir;
No strike. breaking, nothing doing
Gosh, il must be dreary there!
NEVER any. expectation
~ OF a change to better things
When a new administration
Parcels out the harps and wings;
No reforms to push. and never
Anything to win or lose,
Just the same old Joys forever
'Tve got-Tve got the Lysum bluesr'
The Washington times., 1922-09-25
Something to Think About
BY Bruno Lessing-
I'M TAKING A DAY OFF.

WHEREFORE, as 1t Is rain.
l. ing and I cannot so out for
a walk and haven't a good detec.
tive or mystery story at hand
and don't feel like thinking. I'll
tell a real story that a friend Of
mine told me the other day.
His wife went to Europe.
Before she left she asked him
what she should do in case she
needed money.
I'm glad you spoke of that"
he replied. Whatever you do,
don't waste money on cable.
grams. They're too expensive
% cents a word.
Just cable me a single word
Say 'Hurrah.' When l get that
I'll know you need money an
I'll send you all / can"
Several weeks later he ri
ceived the following cablegraml
from her:
Am at Hotel Ruhl in Nice,
frantic with worry. Went to
Monte Carlo and lost. Cannot
paJ hotel bill. Borrowed 5000
francs from Uncle Edward, who
came down from Paris. He lost.
too. What shall. l do? HUR.
RAIL"
However. IL you insist upon
thinking about it. there's no
objection.
The Washington times., 1922-09-25
When Winter Comes,
Can Strikes Be
Far Behind?
By BUGS" BAER..

How are you going to keep
II warm this nice. openwork
winter?
RLIZZARDS will soon be pub.
~ lished with extra editions OF
frost. And coal bin full OF
sleigh bells may make nice
music. but harmony throws OF
no sparks.
YOU can promise your w'te
beautiful Kolinsky coat. but
what are you going to do about
YOUR cellar furnace? That ac'
cepts no promises.
COME folks figure on burning
- rubles, either I'm family or
walnut sizes. Celluloid collars
throw off mics heat. but button
holes are total waste.
OIL stock is just right for
" kitchen stoves. German
marks burn quickly. But not
quick enough.
SoCIETY folks are figuring on
~ stoking their furnaces on
marriage certificates, divorce
papers and alimony bonuses.
They have enough supply on
hand now and can always call
on their lawyers.
SUPREME COURT hands down
~
must 20 back to work. even II
they haven't got any jobs.
THAT means we will get our
L slate again In habit-forming
quantities. But mine owners
claim Il takes time and money
10 harvest coal crops. Laborers' ,
time. And your money.
DRICE will be fourteen dollars
L per ton. direct from farm to
table. That's enough to make
your furnace get a lump In its
throat.
long about October, price will
~ get hotter. Sixteen slugs
per ton. win or lose. Around
december, there will be another
increase in your Xmas stock
ing. Enough to make consum-
ers play wharf golf. You start
on wharf and make Hudson
river in one.
WHEN coal gets up TO one
w thousand dollars for any
kind Of ton of anything, 1t will
be time for citizens to hold in.
dignation meeting in bankruptcy
carnival. -
GOAL isn't coal any more.
IT'S souvenirs.
The Washington times., 1922-09-25
|DO YOU KNOW

According to an ancient Hin
doc superstition, thirteen at
table boded Ill for someone
seated there. In Morse myth.
ology there is a tale which says
that one night twelve ma jor
gods were seated at a table in
Valhalla when Loki, the evil
spirit Joined them, making the
thirteenth. Quarrelling with
Baldur. the Apollo Of the Scan.
dinavians, he shot him dead with
a mistletoe arrow.
Limberger cheese Is made in
the Belgian province Of Lin.
burg.
The Washington times., 1922-09-25
Vacations Need Revising

when the rate Of growth of
height is incomparably greatest.
II was found that both the heig
it was found that both the
height-weight index and the reia.
tive chest measurements dimin-
ished apprcciably.
The authors ask: Can school
work alter the physiological
fluctuations in the development
of the child with impunity?
Their answer is emphatically in
the negative. and they call for a
re-arrangement of holidays more
in consonance with the physio-
logical requirements Of the child.
At present the autumn term
lasts from August 10 to Decem.
ber 81; the spring-summer term
from January Q to June 80.
Thus the term when the child
enjoys the greatest vitality is
one of 103 or 104 days, while the
spring.summer term is one Of
1872 or 1873 days.
The Washington times., 1922-09-25
WHAT effect the school cur.

WHAT effect the school cur
w riculum has upon the
health Of students is the subject
Of study made by Capt. N. c.
Z. Hcrtzberg and DR.. Carl
Schiotz, chief OF the School Of
Medical Service in Norway, who
nave published in the. Medic'7sk
Revue a summary Of their con.
clusions.
Captain Hertzberg and DR..
Schiotz kept records Of the
heights, weights and chest
measurements OF seventy boys
between the ages Uf twelve and
sixteen for one year, from jan
uary, 1920, to January. 1921.
The Lancet Oondon remarks
that "the most significant fca-
lures OF these curves arc the
declines imposed by school work
at seasons when, under physio.
logical conditions. there should
be a rise instead OF a de-
cline. Further. the summer and
Christmas holidays were marked
by a definite rise, and even the
short Easter holiday was long
enough to impose, a small spur
on the curve as it descended
from January to May.
The Washington times., 1922-09-25
SAP and SALT
BY Bert Moses.

tcopyrisht. 1sc2, by Premier Syndicate. Incl
Big truths are usually expressed in small
words.
Woman's most venomous hate is saved up
for her successful rivals.
Bad health often results from an overzealous
intent to have good time"
The pill habit is worse than the diseases
for which they are taken.
The peculiar thing about settling down is
that you first have to settle up.
Hez Heck says: "A good square kick
teaches things that you can't find in a text.
book
The Washington times., 1922-09-25

"WouLD it not be wise.
w the authors ask. for June
to be given up to holiday making
and for August to be made a
work instead of a holiday month?
The authors recommend start.
ing the summer holidays on
June l and letting them last till
the end of July. The Easter
holiday. which comes at the time
of the child's lowest vitality,
should be prolonged to fourteen
days, and the autumn tenn
should be given l19 or 120 DAYS,
while the spring-summer term
has only 80 or 100 days"
The Washington times., 1922-09-25

sdTHE last months before
Il the beginning Of the sum-
mer holidays were characterized
by the lowest weight and chest
measurements in relation to the
height, and the same conditions
were found in the last months
before the Christmas holidays.
In the first half of the year,
The Washington times., 1922-09-25

CTATISTICIANS in the cleo
- trical industry are author.
ity for the statement that more
money is spent by women for
jewelry, perfumery, silk stock.
The Washington times., 1922-09-25
We TOWNE GOSSIP
l. Copyright. 1922. b. star Company.
By T. E. Powers
Q. by star Company.
BY X. G. B.

More than 1000 applications for dos
licenses were made during the month Of
August, according to License Clerk Wallace.
He further stated the city is little more than
$50. 900 richer as q result Of the suddenly de-
veloped desire for canine pets.-Los Angeles
Examiner.
The Washington times., 1922-09-25
Stars and Stripes

THE STUFF COSTS.
There are a lot Of saving folks
And will say they're sly ones
They used to save for rainy days
And now they save for dry ones.
Gent in automobile met beautiful young
lady at edge of town. Wont you have
an automobile rider" he asked
NO. thank you," she replied Il am
Just walking back from one"
The Washington times., 1922-09-25
Lururies Come High

ings and other luxuries than for
the light. heat and power fur
nished by ell the light, heat and
power companies In the United
States.
The Washington times., 1922-09-25
ECONOMY NOTE.

ECONOMY NOTE.
What Is needed most is a salary that
will stick around long enough for us TO
get acquainted with II.
A statesman nowadays is a man who
can get himself reelected.
What is needed is a municipal shooting
gallery for lady bandits. They have no
aim in life.
The Washington times., 1922-09-25

Ihe editorial whch foLows today IN the t easo
W. H. HearstS latest The Syracuse Teegram
of this newspaper D be fact that the reading
family to hch they belong includes another most p0rta
city, Syracuse ~ Y making TWELVE cities Of the gftea
States hich pubhhedl
The Washington times., 1922-09-25

. who withdraw themselves from
the society Of their playmates
and have a tendency TO lsola-
tion and popularity, should
carly be taken in hand, and
should be taught that they are
going to need few things more
in life than to learn how u ad.
just themselves to other people.
Love itself, while it may not
be adaptability. feeds upon
adaptability, and dies without
IL.
Religion that is too rigid to
adapt itself tends TO become a
matter of lunar politics.
And in the more intimate
personal relations the matter
becomes more tragic. Many
a mother is sitting around
plying herself because she has
lost her hold on her husband
and children, when the fact Is
that she simply never learned
to adapt herself.
MANY man explains his
" unpopularity by every
reason except the right one,
which is that he never suf-
ficiently studied how to fit
himself to other people.
Adaptability is not Il sign
Of weakness. nor hypocrisy,
nor softness. II Is one of the
finest products Of human
genius. The cry of all the
inferior and inefficient IS he
cry Of Eugene O'Neil's HAIRY
APE. II don't belong" Every
body with intelligence enough
to want to get the most out
OF life should remember that
his first duty to the human
race is to BELONG.
The Washington times., 1922-09-25
THE SPECTATOR
AdaptabLe PeODLe

KATHLEEN NORRIS says
IA that the people who are
the most generally loved arc
the adaptable people.
1t would seem that the lady
here as In the case of the
queen upon classic occasion.
has said a mouthful.
After all, most people are
hlackballed in the secret coUn.
ellis OF our spirit just because
they do not tit.
The crime OF high treason
against our personality is that
you will not accommodate your.
self to 1t.
You do not have to agree
with us, accept our opinions and
say Amen to our creed, but you
have to put yourself in our
place sufficiently to get Uur
point Of view; otherwise, you
can go hang.
"HEN we speak Of impossi.
w BILE people we simply mean
those who either refuse to adapt
themselves to us or are incap-
able OF doing so. In either case,
our only word for such folk is
What's your hurry? Here's
your hat"
To be adaptable is to be low.
able.
unfortunately, a whole lut OF
the morality and high princi.
pies and virtue of this world
is simply stiff-necked unadapta-
bility. which is why we hate It
and the people that parade it.
THE possession of righteous.
l. ness accompanied by a
sympathetic understanding Of
unrighteousness is a rare com.
bination.
Children who will not mix,
The Washington times., 1922-09-25

WITH HIS operation
FOR APPENDICITIS
AND WHENEVER I
see him
HE TELLS me abour
Il.
WITH GREAT detail.
AND 4t make. me
sick.
AND 10 tax that guy.
AND raraE's the
woman,
THE BIG fat woman.
WHO DRESSES
herself.
IN kNicksR.
BockERs.
AND ON Sunday
morning
wAooLEs PAST my
house.
10 SURE tax her.
As A matter OF fact.
IF ! we're boss.
THERE ARE so mony
things.
THAT I would tar.
BEFORE THE dogs.
THAT MORE than
likely.
WHEN ! got to them
10 LET them live.
wrrIouf ANY fee.
svr' r.ess other
birds.
10 SOAK 'em good.
The Washington times., 1922-09-25

IT'S a simple thing IL you
l. know how TO handle II.
Homer was great writer.
Athens was a splendidly gov
crned city. Alexander the Great
was q genius as well as soldier.
Archimcdes was "A great inventor.
Aristotle was wonder as a
philosopher.
And in all these centuries we
haven't improved on them.
All you have to do is TO harp
on these facts, ring in a few
more names and make every
body feel like a "dumb-bell." l."
It's the easiest thing in the
world-I've done it a hundred
times.