davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Birmingham age-herald., 1922-02-03
FURTHER ANNOUNCEMENTS
 BY BROTHER VOLIVA

Wilbur Glenn Voliva has elaborated his idea of a flat world. The sky is solid dome, says Brother Yoliva, resting on an ice rim, like the cover of chafing dish, to which the sun, moon and stars are attached. The ice is to keep reck- less mortals from tumbling over the edge. The sun is about 40 miles in diameter and is. 8, 3,000 miles distant from the earth
 Henry Ford is said to have pronounced hi5- tory "all bunk" Voliva goes him one better and calmly scraps the accumulated knowledge of the earth and the universe that has been gathered by painstaking philosophers and scien- tists for centuries. Two or three thousand years ago if savant had stood in the market place of some ancient city and announced that the world was round he might have been mobbed, but great deal of water has run under the bridges since then. Even Galileo, who died as late as 1642, was condemned by the inquisition for knowing too much
 overseer Voliva not only declares the earth to be flat, but the school children of Zion City are being taught his views, which makes matters worse. If Zion Citys overseer is what is known to the newspaper profession as "pub- licity hound" he is an unqualified success, but if he is sincere in what he says, the University of Chicago should send few missionaries over to Zion City. f
 Volva is said to be shrewd and successful in business. Evidently, man may be pro- foundly ignorant of this universe of ours and still make money, and that brings up the moot question of the value of college education. :.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1922-02-03
nANGfR
From II

From 1T nerican Legion Weekly.
 sas and Donald were paying their ,s.s to the metropolis and fodnd the ways of the big hotel not their ways. The morning found them pTen ..-to fare forth, but unable to locats tha -yairway. Sandy discovered the elevate Aaft with the door open, and very promptly tumbled to the bottom. Leaning over the opening, Donald called to his friend sprawled out below
 Did ye get doom a richt, Sandy?"
 Aye, thot did, replied Sandy. 'But, mon, be careful O thot first step-tis brutep'
The Birmingham age-herald., 1922-02-03
FITTING TRIBUTE TO A COURAGEOUS VOTER

The Calhoun county road bond campaign manager has arranged to reward one citizen in Beat 16 of that county who had the courage to cast favorable vote where all the other voters cast 32 negative ballots. If this citizen is man he will receive suit of clothes; if woman a dress
 It required real grit and conviction of being right for this one citizen to oppose all the other voters of his beat participating in that election. It was more difficult because in rural beats voters are closer together and the per sonal equation is involved.
 But brave men and women can always be found. They are in every community pre- serving it's stability. They do not at once win every cause which they espouse, but the leaven of their courage and sincerity works on their neighbors until it gets results.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1922-02-03
AMERICANISM IS SAFE IN THE SOUTH

It is good for the preservation of the ideals of our American forefathers that the country has the unmixed native blood of the south to which to appeal in national crises. Whatever the faults of the southern people, they are typi- cally American. They live and think as Ameri- cans.
 The census figures of 1920 show that of the 2,34S,174 inhabitants of Alabama there are only 17,662 of foreign birth, which is only d fraction over per cent of the total white pop ulation of 1,447,032. Foreign hates and preju- dices find poor soil for venting themselves in Alabama.
 There are 9oQs652 negroes in this state. So far as Americanism is concerned, the negroes are like the whites. In fact the negro, being of simple mind and taking small note of the world beyond his home knows little about foreign countries and cares less. German propagan- dists who tried to influence him during the war failed.
 The south has broad and roomy spaces It welcomes desirable people from wherever they come, but it wants them to come as matter of individual preference and because they like
The Birmingham age-herald., 1922-02-03
MAKING QUICK DELIVERY OF
 BIRMINGHAM GOODS

Birmingham's railroad friends are doing their part in the extension of our trade territory. The quick delivery of goods in nearby towns over fast local freight lines is bringing business to this city's wholesalers and manufacturers.
 One afternoon at 9 o'clock an Alexander City merchant ordered goods of a Birmingham wholesaler by telephone. They were taken from stock, packed and in an hours time were at the Central of Georgia freight depot. By o'clock the next morning the Alexander City merchant had the goods on his shelves, was making sales and writing his check in pay ment. The check left Alexander City at o'clock for Birmingham
 The Southern railway announces an uptown delivery depot in Tuscaloosa, and cars leav- ing Birmingham at 9;30 in the evening will arrive in Tuscaloosa ready for delivery of freight by 7:30 the next morning.
 When to quick delivery are added the freight rates favoring Birmingham in her trade ter ritory, the advantage of having the Birming- ham wholesaler act as warehouseman and the excellence of the stocks from which the country merchant draws, nothing seems to stand in the way of the trade relations that should exist be- tween Birmingham and cities within 100 miles, and more.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1922-02-03
FAMOUS AFTER-DINNER SPEECHES

From Judge
 "Let's adjourn to the cellar"
 'Now, lady, if you'll just show me where de snow shovel is"
 "Confound it, why don't you try another butcher?"
 "John, the maid is out, and you'll have to help with the dishes"
 Say, waiter, I asked for my check-not for last months grocery bill"
 .'Where the dickens did I put my pepsin tablets?"
 ''No wonder you're fat, with the amount you eat"
 ''Please-excuse-me-ki go -out-pop?"
 'You are certainly swell cook, kid. Will you marry mel"
 "Goo-geol'
The Birmingham age-herald., 1922-02-03
IN HOTEL LOBBIES
 AND ELSEWHERE
TRADE AT HOME

Buying home products has got to become au- tomatic before we really get there on that line" said James H. McCary. "Let me illus trate. Ten years ago when I was in the whole sale business I also operated box factory. At that time l handled large amount of crackers made in Atlanta.
 Thought occurred to me that the Atlanta man whose crackers I bought should buy boxes from me. I went over to see him and named prices that were quite attractive. He tried to let me down easy, but when I urged mw prices, he had the manhood to tell me that he bought only Atlanta-made boxes, even though paying sometimes more for them than others could be gotten for. He believed it his duty to pat ronize home firms.
 q had no counter argument Tn fact, had greater respect for the man and greater admira- tion for the city with that spirit. It has got to be that way in Birmingham before we land where we should"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1922-02-03
cHANsoN AUX cHEvALIERs

c. T. Davis, in the Arkansas Gazette. Chorus of sword blades singing,
 Shock of the shattering lance, Tide of the victory swinging
 On the turn of circumstance; And the war chant rising and ringing; Then peace-and the deep night bringing Red lips and white arms clinging,
 And the glamour of sheer romance o Warrior, when it is over
 And the last of the battles are won; When the pinions of silence hover
 On the rim of the vanishing sun; When the long trail ends for the rover May you go to the death you discover As a lover that goes to lover
 Through the dusk when the day is done.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1922-02-03
DANCING GETS MAJORITY

"The people in Precinct g, District 1, certain ly are in favor of dancing at East Lake if the sentiments expressed by those voting there Mon day is any sign" said Robert R. Durfeld.
 q had referendum petition the opening of Pershing Pier at the store where the voting was going on, and every man and woman vot- ing Monday invited to sign the petition. Not single man woman refused to sign it.
 "They not only all signed the petition, but all said they were strong for the opening of the pier
 "One woman 79 years of age asked to sign the petition, stating that she enjoyed dancing when she was a young lady and could see no harm in it when properly conducted
The Birmingham age-herald., 1922-02-03
THE RACE OF sUPERMEN

From Leslie's Weekly.
 Just as we were wondering whether bobbed hair brought bald heads, the international eu- genics congress invoked America to produce a race of supermen. The agitated solicitude of the gyneeologists exposes fear lest we should shrink from the task.
 It is to be regretted that "superman" is not defined with the clarity of "agenda." But we have already 6,000,000 families owning homes; werkingmen who pay $60,000,000 to 1500o0 labor leaders who order them to strike 104.- 0O6, ,0O0 working days annually, yet still find time to work; business which is feasting presence of justifable hope in shrunken mar ket-and a man in Manhattan who left dining room without tip or riot.
 It will be no exertion, but a pleasure, to bring forth race of supermen.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1922-02-03
EXAMINE. IMMIGRANTS ABROAD

William Roscoe Thayer, in the North American
 Review.
 Doubtless more care is taken now than used to be taken to shut out immigrants whom in- sanity or loathsome contagious diseases would render danger to population. But any inspection which is limited to minute less for each case cannot be thorough. Indeed, it must seem a mockery to everyone who realizes how much is at stake. To make our inspection worthy of this great country and adequate to the need of safeguarding the health of the 110,000,000 persons here is something that should be insisted on. One obvious means of securing proper examination would be to have the prospective ,emgrants examined by an American official at the American consulate abroad from which the emigrant expects to sail. Then, if for any reason he is found unfit and denied passport, he cannot make the voy- age over her and either be turned back sue ceed in sneaking his way past our immigration authorities
The Birmingham age-herald., 1922-02-03
x * *
GQRGAS MEMORIAL CAMPAIGN
 BEGINS THIS MONTH

By establishing an international institute at Panama City and a school of sanitation at Tus- caloosa, fitting honor will be done to Maj. Gen William Crawford Gorgas, and in a way that would have pleased him most. The work for humanity which he did in many parts of the world will be perpetuated.
 The campaign to raise funds for this pur- pose in Alabama will begin February 20. Rop- ert Jemison, ST., of Birmingham, is state chair man for the Gorgas memorial, and George Gordon Crawford is chairman of the executive committee. Workers are being organized in every county in the state. Doubtless the task of raising Alabamas quota will be speedily ac- complished.
 Wherever the name of General Gorgas is known it is reverenced, and in those countries where he eliminated some of the worst scourges to mankind he is regarded almost as a di- vinity. Alabamians in particular should take pride in the career of General Gorgas, a native of this state, whose family has played con- spicuous part in its history.
 The Gorgas memorial is a practical philan- thropy as well as a means of honoring great American The school of sanitation at Tus- caloosa and the Gorgas institute in Panama will perform service of incalculable value.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1922-02-03
BOOK VOYAGES

I often cruise the tropic seas And meet with strange adventures there; No ship need for trips like these I journey in my easy chair. The palm trees wave by gleaming strands, On coral reefs the pillows break The haunts of bold, marauding bands. Well armed and swift to vengeance take I ride the waves with pirate crews And chase a galleon OCT the foam, With such wild ways as seadogs use, But all the while stay safe at home.
 PAUL COOK.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1922-02-03
WANTS SECRETARY EMPLOYED

Passing resolutions and appointing commit tees will never get real results in attracting small industrial concerns to Birmingham; the city must have paid secretary who knows his work and who if necessary can go out and bring in the type of firms needed 'here,' says Richard Randolph, chairman of the industrial development committee of the Birmingham Real Estate Board.
 When I was in Cincinnati recently I mo- ticed that the upper floors of many buildings were occupied by small manufacturing con- eerns, many of them making things for home consumption. They call these places lofts
 of Birmingham could have many of such industries and would back them by support of purchasing Birmingham-made articles, the city would stride forward at faster pace than now.v
The Birmingham age-herald., 1922-02-03
MOVEMENT ENDORSED

American medical associations throughout the country have indorsed the work to be car ried on both at the institute at Panama and the first field branch at Tuscaloosa as a me- morial to General Gorgas," said Dr. Scale Harris.
 "A work so vast and far-reaching as that of the Gorgas Memorial institute can be main tained only by an assured income from perma- nent foundation. Therefore the board of di- rectors of the Gorgas memorial are establishing a permanent foundation of $6,OO0,OoG whose principal will never be touched, but will be for ever carefully guarded and as carefully in- vested. Such a foundation will guarantee that an adequate income will be available each year for the carrying on of the scientific program in Panama in this country and elsewhere throughout the world"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1922-02-03
LETTERS TO EDITOR
TRIBUTE FROM A FRIEND

To the Editor of The Age Herald:
 Shakespeare, the great English poet and play. writer, uses in substance this characterization of the human family: "All the world is a stage and men and women are the actors; each appears in turn, acts his part, and retires behind the cur tain" We are almost daily witnessing scenes that impress us with the truth of this concep- tion of the poet Just yesterday one of the actors in the great drama of life completed his role and passed off the stage never to return.
 Sixty-nine years ago John Milton Erwin was born at the old home place of his grandfather, John Erwin, on the Pinson road, just south of the Five Mile creek ford. His father, William Erwin, inherited this home and there reared large family, three of whom are now living, N. H.. F. L. and E. B. Erwin.
 It is my good fortune to have been reared in the same community with the Erwin family. say good fortune for no has ever suffered any detriment from coming in contact with the Erwins. They truly represent that human elekent known as the salt of the earth. I have never heard of an Erwin being charged with doing an improper thing, either in social, civic or political matters, and what I say of the Erwin family can repeat with emphasis to John Milton, or Uncle John, as his neighbors loved to call him.
 Uncle John was quiet man, but in no sense a recluse; he took lively interestin community affairs and was responsive to the demands of his church and Masonic order, as well to ill- dividual appeals for help. No worthy applicant was ever turned from his door empty handed
 He is gone, and we shall all miss him-miss him in the civic counsels, miss him in the church activities, miss him in fraternal relations, miss him in.community affairs, and most of all in the home, where a wife and daughter have grown accustomed to rely upon his guidance in solving their home problems. But may not they, and we as well, console themselves in the belief 4hat death is but gateway to better existence, and that by and by there will be a reunion that will be perpetual?
 R. c. HEWITT.
 Ri,,,,i ochal,a EehrlIary 1922
The Birmingham age-herald., 1922-02-03
FRAUDULENT ADVERTISING IN
 ITS WORST FORM

In recent editorial the Atlanta Georgian is- sued warning against flake" employment agencies which are taking advantage of eco- homie conditions throughout the country to rob their victims of the last few dollars they pos sess by dangling before them the prospect of a job. The Georgian says:
 There is one particularly vicious and wicked quality of advertising abroad in this land just that needs particular guarding against. Conspicu- examples of it to be noted right here in Georgia It is outcropping of the distressing unemployment situation-happily getting what better-and is and contemptible it is manifestly designed. It seeks take from the pockets of the unemployed and needy by foul the little that said unemployment and needy may have wherewith to tide itself along it seeks employment
 Beware the advertisement. for example, that offers for a "smal fee'-if stated in the 'ad' than s5 say. but generally not stated put your sort of preferred list of prospective employees" here and there, perhaps upon contemplated tentatively considered project of moment which may may teralize.
 The chances that such lad" is Take" pure and simple. and has to do with you only the primary extent of getting fee from you for services never to be performed.
 As the Georgian declares this form of 
 sible, because it is aimed at cas sof people who can least afford to be victimized. There is little sympathy for the man who buys a "gold brick" in the expectation of getting something for nothing. He is overreached by his own greed, but the without job who stakes his last dollar the chance of getting one, because he retains his self-respect and wants to earn his living, should be given every protection of the press and police authorities
 Something of this kind has been attempted in connection with the promised development of Muscle Shoals. The publicity which Henry Ford's offer has received makes it easy for swinders to obtain money from persons looking for work by assuring them that their names will be placed "preferred' list for fee, and they will be given highy-paid jobs at Muscle Shoals.
 No responsible newspaper ever accepts fraud ulent advertising knowingly. It is not always possible to find out whether proffered adver- tisement is a fraud or not, but close watch is kept and much questionable matter is rejected A large newspaper which tries to protect its
The Birmingham age-herald., 1922-02-03

F San Francisco man who found a stolen mail pouch containing $lO0, ,000 and returned it, not only received no reward, but can't even get a job. He may be excused for wondering if honesty is the best policy.
 * No wonder members of the Railway Business association were surprised when President Alba Johnson made humorous address in New York. The average railway man nowadays is the picture of gloom.
 George Sylvester Viereck, testifying in Big Bill" Thompsons libel suit against the Chi cago Tribune, says Bill" is fine fellow Wen what could you expect from George Sylvester! Liberty hasn't been battered to earth after all. The Georgia court of appeals has decided that when an automobilist has bottle of hooch in his pocket his car can't be confscated.
 < < < "Bluebeard" Landru's appeal having been de- nied his head must come off. There is noth- ing now to prevent Landru from showing the world how Frenchman can die.
 * Portugal doesn't want to support Carl and zita in Madeira. That's a responsibility no country would be willing to undertake on purely phianthropic grounds.
 ;; Trotzky, the cables tell us, is the idol of the bolshevik army. That shows the low tastes of bolsheyid about as well as anything we know of
 Secretary Davis is in a sanitarium for physical inventory" The doctors usually find something wrong to reward their search
 X X x The hoarse hoots we hear are coming from country editors who have been informed that mail order houses are losing money. With something like 50 daily papers, every Parisian should be able to see something in print that meets with his approval
 x X New York must be more tolerant. Some of the critics admit that the Chicago Grand Opera company can put on a show Women students are rioting in India. The emancipation of woman in that part of the world seems to be complete
 x X Nellie By, if still alive, would be in posi- tion to dispute the assertion of Voliva that the world is flat.
 If MT. Bryan does land seat in the Senate the Congressional Record may have to be con siderably enlarged.
 * x * Waht we don't understand is how Starving Russia can maintain the largest and finest army in the world.
 x Ridicule may be fatal to man in public life but it hasn't hurt the sale of flvvers.
 < < The passing of the clay pipe does not leave void that can't be filled.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1922-02-03
THE PIANO AS HOME DISCIPLINE

From the Cnlcago NeWS'
 Superintendent Mortensons plea for less jazz and more home discipline touches a national issue already rather widely discussed. One parent, writing to an eastern newspaper, has urged general revival of piano lessons as first aid to sane rhythms and parental discipline No engine, he claims, is so good as the piano for inculcating industry, endurance and exact ness in the young, and no other form of home work is so easy for parents to keep under super vision.
 There seems to be good deal in this sugges- tion.l In the modern apartment home parents cannot fail to overhear and, granted an average musical ear, to criticise every step in the daily stint. They will unfailngly cooperate in this form of discipline, mourning thereby training in endurance hardly less beneficial than that re- ceived by the child As for the moral stamina developed by young pianists, one has only to recall how the famous Elsie Dinsmore fell off the piano stool in a faint, cracking her little head upon the floor, rather than quit her post without parental permission.
 More time at the baby grand and less in the chummy roadster seems one practical way of reviving Spartan virtues in the young. "What is home without a metronome?" might serve as a slogan for the campaign. One scarcely needs to add that the family automatic piano and other lazy paths to music should be barred in the interests of sound discipline
The Birmingham age-herald., 1922-02-03
A CHINESE PUZZLE

'The Meridian rate case is the Chinese puzzle of modern railroad rate confusions," said Charles Jones, of the traffic bureau. "As many different opinions are entertained as to bearings of<he decision of the interstate commerce com mission as there are men giving expression of opinion.
 ''In my opinion the tange has not begun to untange itself. The case has beer ae,1sd six times, and each time so muc' a Ion follows that it must all be oae over sir We are not near the 1 i5N
The Birmingham age-herald., 1922-02-03
Birmingham, February 1, 1922.
Ex-soLDIER IN TROUBLE

To the Editor of The Age-Herald
 Has anyone any sympathy for an unfortunate soldier boy that served IT months in the United States army during the World war?
 After being discharged the first of the year 1919, he has had all kinds of bad luck. Sickness getting crippled, his father getting disabled at work, having to take charge of his fathers busi- ness and short crops, with the fall in prices of farm products, have placed him in such posi- tion that he is at his rows end to know what to do as his father has large family of little ones and he and his father very badly in debt with nothing to get any money out of
 Anyone that has any sympathy for him, and feels like helping the poor fellow over the rough place, please send all help that they feel like giving him direct to William E. Kerr, ex-Private United States Army, Elkmont, Ala, R. F. D. No. 3
 January 30, 1922.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1922-02-03
LIBRARY ON FOURTH FLOOR

''You can imagine my surprise the other after when pretty young girl walked up to my desk in the city comptroller's office and asked if I would let her have 'Ruggles of Red Gap
 to read,' said E. w. Ellis. q looked at the young lady, and after begging her pardon asked her what it was she wanted. She repeated the title, and I realized she thought she was in the public library, which is on the fouft floor of the building. 1 told her she must be in the wrong place, but she stated she had never been in the city hall before, but had been told the library was on the third floor. When she real ized her mistake she beat hasty retreat"