davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington times., 1922-11-30
SAP AND SALT
By BERT MOSES

" nBWE MUSES.
(copyrisht. fsss. BY Premier syndi-
cate. fnc.)
Justice is q costly luxury II you
60 to law for It.
It IL highly advisable to stick to
the thing nature intended you for,
Ambition II wasted n II II d.
rected toward something that 10
not useful.
Popularity 10 easier for . beauti-
ful woman to acquire than for one
who 10 virtuoue.
One way Or another, the world
Seems to get along on very low
percentage Of honesty.
Much Unnecessary trouble could
b. avoided II We quit interfering
with Cody way Of doing things.
Hes Hsck says: "It's 4 dirty
trick 70 6roD . hairpin into IN auto
belongin' - . nan with . Jealous
The Washington times., 1922-11-30

r OS ANGELES. - In future.
when the love dream Of John
- and Jane gives way to strife
and turmoil. instead Of seeking the
balm Of q divorce court they Will
visit Q vibration specialist to be re-
turned to connubial harmony
much a. q piano 10 tuned when
fiat notes are heard-fof science
has stepped in TO solve the prob
lem. t" ~
II is> an = matter Of discordant
vibrations. accordiAg. to Baron Eu-
gene Fsrsen. formerly Of Moscow
and now in Los Angeles.
And Baron Fersep should know,
for while he IL q bachelor, he 10
also an international authority Of
that branch OF science which Is
delving deep into the secrets Of the
hitherto unsuspected physical laws.
tending to show that Q strange
substance, known as AURA" radi.
ates from every individual and OBJ
ject.
That this radiation is not theo-
retical but a tangible material Is
shown by the Investigations of
prominent scientists, who, by
means Of special color screens,
have actually seen this many hued
magnetic force thrown off by the
body and have measured its VI
bratory eccentricities with delicate
Instruments. the baron said, quot
ing authorities.
When this physical power be-
comes better known John won't
marry Jane until their vibrations
have been tested Lovers since
the dawn OF time have tested these
vibrations by walking along lonely
lanes, but Baron Fersen says Il
can be done much better BY SOL
epce. b KS
The siri who has found her
"sheik" and n unable to time
him up to her vibratory pitch can
at least tow him GROUND to =
Psychological laboratory and -.
termine whether hers n IN aheo-
lute1x hopeless case or not
We have found there are ar.
fsrsat vtbeattsas fse 6xfcsrsat
The Washington times., 1922-11-30

sorts Of love-" the Baron, said.
Mother love vibrates differently
from the love Of q child for its
parents. All the other loves are
vibrating electrons. The reason q
man is attracted by . particular
girl, or vice, versa, ID because their
vibrations harmonic.
- one person loves and not
the other, the lover, for . time.
can set up similar vibrations In
the object Of passion-always pro-
vided there ,is not q stronger coun.
ter force pulling In another direc-
tion. Aa
I'm that case the two were
never meant for each other, and
the sooner they find 1t out the
better"
The Washington times., 1922-11-30
Fasting TO Cure Fits.

Epilepsy may b cured BY fast;
ing. DR.. Hugh Conklin told th4
twenty-sixth annual convention a
the American osteopathic Asod
citation. Epilepsy, according q
DIR. Conklin. 10 caused by the N
proper functioning of osstn1I
glands in the bowels. BY fastiA1
for twenty-five days, taking onl}
water. . cure may be effsctsd. ,
said.
MANY people," said DR.. c6nI
lin. fast thirty days and are nsvsI
afflicted with fits again. Ths
longest fast which any pstisot
ever took under my dlrsctie1
lasted sixty days. out a. thif(yI
seven tests IN which childrsn ~
used a. patients only two seill n
affected by the diseass. The GO
dren al were under the A9o ~
eleven years. bat we affect eNfc|
In older patients in from 20 O<
per cant cf the casse ~ unde
take" u, q
The Washington times., 1922-11-30

can consul general. cit on Tues
days and Thursdays; and one -
SCISSOR each. appointed by the ftAl
ian and Japanese consul gensrals,
sit on Saturday. In the French
mixed court assessors only sit
with the Chinese magistrates. !.
The Washington times., 1922-11-30
Undsrground River =
Lubock ~

The mystsrtcus diff,sultis
which Lubsek. 0ssmAay. hes -
.sxpsrieneins MIN ~ wa&er suy
ply are found d ~ aps 70 - ~
suspscted nndererennd ~,
with several tributeriee. nug1ol
into the Nnltio about tvUoQ
nilss bevsa1 NE seaseerA
The Washington times., 1922-11-30
BY David M. Church

r ONDON.-Unhappy marriages
are poisoning the life streA-l
- In England, and all because
OF anttQuated divorce laws, accord
ing to Sir Arthur Conan Doyle.
Several hundred thousand people
are now wandering about Eng
land, helpless victims Of our cruel
and antiquated divorce laws" Sir
Arthur declared. "They cannot
live with their legal spouse, yet
they are not free to marry. II
stands to reason they will form
illegal unions.
such people are as dangerous
to the body public a. microbes in
the blood, poisoning the lifestream
Of the nation.
I'VE have half q million graves
in Flanders" said the author, his
deep voice tinsiing with CULVER
ings. I'VE want half q million
cradles in England.
But here are hundreds Of thou
sands of people practically steril-
lied by our divorce laws. They
cannot settle down and raise fami-
lies, because the law forbids them
to marry.
"And this sin" - Sir Arthur
leaned forward and spoke earn.
estiy "is the fault Of the
Church!
"Ths bishops Of England. good
people, no doubt, but slaves to old
texts which do not In the least
correspond to modern conditions.
are IN that way the greatest enc
miles to human progress and hap
piness!
'Unfortunately. the bigoted pco-
pie Of the Church are organised.
Only one out of ten people in Eng
land 10 connected with the Church.
But the other nine are not organ
lied, 90 their will In overruled by
the organised weapones Of the
Church, always against progress.
Surely It II obvious that q law
that keeps q man or woman tied
for life to q dipsomaniac, q life con-
vict, an insane person, or one by
whom they have been deserted. 10
cruel.
1--WE are the laggards of the
world In this matter. just as we
were the last to reform our abom-
Unable criminal code"
Sir Arthur ID q leader In the
movement for divorce law re-
forms. He displayed heaps OF
letters upon his study table from
persons who bewailed the fact that
they were enmeshed In unhappy
marriages. but were unable to se.
cure relief because Of the English
divorce laws. which permit divorce
for men only on proof Of miscon-
duct BY. their wives and for women
only upon proof Of misconduct.
cruelty or desertion.
Pastor Exposes Medium.
MARION. INDIA flsshlight In
the hands Of the Rev. d. L.
Woodward. uaator Of thA First
The Washington times., 1922-11-30
TUNING VIBRATIONS TO RESTORE
LOVES DREAM

Baron Eugene Fersen Has New Plan for Putting End to
Domestic Strife.
The Washington times., 1922-11-30
DIR. ALEX XANDER IRVINE
ON MENTAL MEDICINE,
How One Soldier Was Aroused From An Ap'
pareptly Fatal Lethargy in France By
Anger at Army Surgeon Who
Predicted His Death.
BY DR.. Alexander Irvine.

IL haA q
TN base hospital in France purpose in Life It wasn't tn.
Of nobes kind Of purpose but y2
ssy arr waS Which haS os% s'e ended ii.
.:s % !: s:: ;:
Of and wasting away snsy % that an dsh WAS WAS
cenDs .sia .si's e iSs iSs
q r o s s fs
tell cohnely in How Medical Change
textbooks
now ns% yssl' snd those
&. .s:
in n, few day: anyway. Just tSAt every decade
%ns Gives New m .s:ss. ss & s tn: N: :: q
connss ay sr n % % $ nao- We Of .r
's.. s his % are n paid to asD psS E ~s si
81 % s. he d viii uas H the Ss stage
DSs.s s:.s &
sas sxe '
ne ed for ns worS nd
mmicked Engishman he right thought ,s
PSALMS FOR TODAY
Happy the nation that boaseth Of greatness
herself her nighbors by loud voice
in the face Of the weak From 'erofyns God
Happy the nation which beloved Of her because
she but ,bs sd she sSe F the character Of
Happy the nation whose flag sends thrill Sf Joy into the
the eaa: :'ss:
nation whose worker: well cared 4 fo M q
His tenderest solcude toward the and the oppressed
virtue ss Of %edoe TSs mediocre sd the
the bad for heaven and the too good for hell God
and whose have sn II
Tree. planted By the water bringing fruit
happy and people therein For
greater than riches and harmony Of hearts than fine gold
The Washington times., 1922-11-30
GEORGE BERNARD SHAW
AND ::'WORLD OF FOOLS

He Yiev Of K-sssn Proposal "tho pet Thing Yettvi
To Be Half a Commission
The Washington times., 1922-11-30
Pastor Expoees Medium.

Pastor Exposes Medium.
MARION. Ind.--A flashlight IN
the hands Of the Rev. d. L.
Woodward, pastor OF the First
Baptist Church. disillusfo o n . 4
thirty citizens who were listening
to the conversation Of alleged
.spIsis:" in . North Marios home
- suaisnes xas csntiensd u
The Washington times., 1922-11-30

There arc million opportunifes Tor wonHn In the United
States-more than million Women goi be and
important In business We wish that ty could all stay
at home and raise children and take their families
They Will some day. when en are what theyought to be- and
when for every good there will be supplied by cvxa
tion good man whom the woman trust
In the meanwhile woman 70 amount TO something must
very often work for herself and woman can It, Il il
difficult they imagine Vert often tie head Of bus
you get there by CLOSE attention. politsnss hard
work and integsnoeyou And the position Of boss easier
than the position Of smploys
He Or shs who works for himself or hask works with 4
mind that n always aetivs with heart beating with hope and
ambition
And thas h thrssxparssr a success.
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1922-02-02
Juss Common Humanity.

The very serious trouble with most
people 10 that they are human, Ike
ourselves. They react In the same
way under the same stresses. They
also want sympathy, and are looking
Tor friend They, too. heartily en-
Joy being appreciated or at least. un-
derstood. Burdens that are heavy for
u are heavy for them. II Is as easy
for them to watch other people At
work as II is for US. They. likewise,
enjoy picnics and parades.-ExchanRe
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1922-02-02
TALES OF TOWN
HoNING For SPRING.

Gosh but I'm tired Of this winters cold
And maxim hres and totin' in coal
And cindsrs out Of the old stove
bowl!
And ache TO feel the old. glad thrill
When the redbud blooms and the
coyote cries
Through the April night to the star
lit skies
Gosh-zicketyi
l hone for spring.
know that the farmers they-all talk
That the real sharp weather always
10
The time whom fesder does the biz
Slnppin' the sidemeat on his stock;
And feed goes furder, and all O. that
Sticks to the ribs and makes more
fat
Butch, gee whizl
hone for spring.
hone for spring and the onion smell;
For clean-turned dirt and . can O.
bait;
For the lilAc's bloom by the garden
gate
And the taste Of greens; and the lur-
inR spell
OF earth and sky, thru the night
and day,
From . crocus bloom to the Milky
Way! !.
Gosh-ding II all
hona for spring.
The most terribls sight is to see
pretty woman spit.
. q 3
Any man Who has . smart son or
daughter believes in heredity.
q . .
Anybody can get married, but It Is
not every lawyer that can get a per-
son out Of It.
. . q
HTaxes To Be Reduced in 1922"
says . bsadline. DON'T cheer, boys
The poor fellow may be lying.
= = &
Il have ny franchise said . man
coming from The court house with =
marriage hcaAse IN hi hand
Eonae day everybody will acknovi-
edge that business Is more . question
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1922-02-02
bee line for squaw Butte.
A Judieious Inouirv.

A we'll known travelling man who
visits the drug trade, says he has Of
ten heard druggists ask customer.
who wished to buy a cough medicine
whether it was for child or an adult
and d for . child, they almost inyar-
iably recommended Chamberlain's
Cough Remedy. The reason for this
u that they know there is no danger
from 1t and that it always cures
There Il not the least danger in giy-
ing it and for colds, Group Ind whoop-
ing cough it il unsurpassed,
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1922-02-02
WHILE Emmstt's rood fortune IN

WHILE Emmstt's good fortune In
= getting = mammoth Ice plant
nus IT . time vhAn m lee plsnt
seeassd abovt the last thing II needed.
~ valns Of ths acquisition will BE-
much nose apparent - the tsmPera-
uss rises IN the sweet and gentle
summer time. The msn who had the
courage 70 make such . big invest
nsnt 1t time Of financial depression
aFe 70 b. commended.
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1922-02-02

Henry Ford announces that he will
Immediately begin campaign to
eliminate gold ~ = monetary basis in
the United Safes. 1t may bc-we
don't know-that the time has come
whsn the monstary system Of the
country must b rsadjuStsd upon .
Aivver standard.
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1922-02-02

THERE 10 Z fellow In the federal
psnitentiary, sentenced for 10
years. for printing and circulating
an exact copy Of an article from Sem
ntor Tom Watson's paper. 1t was
during the war and before Watson's
pspsr was suppressed. The fellow At
Lsayenworth can't understand why he
should 70 TO the pen and the man
who wrote the article should 90 TO
the United states senate. There are
others who can't understand.
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1922-02-02

CURRENT COMMENT

THERE i = small matter which
ooms Of our eub@eribers have
1ssMin9ly forgotten. To VI It u
nacso1ary IN our bulins@@. We are
WY nodset and do not wish to speak
MM
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1922-02-02

The federal vocational educational
bureau wants farmers wives to keep
diary Of what they do every day.
That won't be hard TO do. All farm
ers wives do is just work.
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1922-02-02

The New York Tribune says the
north pole il moving south. That may
be hard to believe, but it might have
been worse. Suppose the Tribune
had stated that the north pole was
moving northl
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1922-02-02

IF the farm conference in Washing
ton accomplished nothing moro than
to awaken eastern business men to
the real situation confronting the az
rieultural sections Of the West IL viii
have an achievement to its credit Of
great importance. The buying power
Of the farm ID morc than = third Of
the buying power Of the country. With
this cut dowr. the factories that for
msriy supplied II are running on part
time or are closed. II the East knows
whore it's bread i battered, Il Win
give it, best corporation to helping
work out the problems now confront
ing the farmer, 20 far - they can
be worked out through intelligent
collective action.
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1922-02-02

Secretary Of State Hughes's chief
clerk il named Ben Davis. Can It be
possiblel We haven't seen our Ben d.
since yesterday, and II the chief clerk
10 baldheadsd, has dropping mus
tachs. military air and greets his
chief with "How arc you, you forlorn
imp Of degeneracy"-thxt's our Ben.
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1922-02-02
TAey Appeal to Our Symu,th;..

The bilious and dyspeptic are con-
slant sufferers and appeal to our sym
pathies. Many such, however. have
been completely restored to health
BY the use Of Chamberlain Tablets
These tablets strengthen the stomach.
invigorate the liver and improve the
digestion They also cause 4 gentle
movement Of the bowels. When YOU
have any trouble with your stomach.
give them . trial.
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1922-02-02

"Ths minors WIN hght TO the end,"
according TO John L. Lewis. their
prssiasnt. It IL 20 much more fup
fighting than working, and 10 much
more profitable for the leaders. In
dustrisi peace would mean starvation
to the windy boys.
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1922-02-02

The Dodge family Of Detroit now
turns up with = million dollar pearl
necklace which Cathrins, = Russian
princess, used 10 own. This ought to
put the Dodge car In socisty.
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1922-02-02

King Boris Of Bulgaria has some
elephants on his hands which he
wants to dispose Of. We know num-
her Of politicians, as well as other
people, who are In the same fix.
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1922-02-02

A Milwaukee robbsr Is out for the
spectacular prize. He stole q rail-
road engine and the company can't
find Il.
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1922-02-02

Another Milwaukee rcbber planned
to steal = carload Of cheese. But it
was strong he couldn't do it.
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1922-02-02

Only 1000 guests will be permitted
to attend the wedding Of Princess
Mary in London. We will not be one
Of them. Our invitation evidently
blew of the front porch.
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1922-02-02

Russia II turning from communion
Hunger generally pounds some ssnss
into people.
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1922-02-02

A Havana editor wrote what he ac-
tually thought about = book and the
author shot him. Moral: Don't be
an editor.
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1922-02-02

Armour lost 81 millions last year.
II seemS that the Western cattlemen
were not the only ones to get n jolt.
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1922-02-02

A New York client drove his attor-
ney to suicide. The worm turneth
At last.
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1922-02-02

Argentina has a compulsory voting
law which carries 4 penalty Of fine
and Imprisonment for failure to vote.
In America the only penalty is for
voting too many times.
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1922-02-02

Taniac corrects stomach disorders,
Strengthens the nerves and restores
health through its effect ON the aP-
petite and nutrition Of the body. d.
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1922-02-02
uENRY FORD announces the .us-

HENRY FORD announces the sus-
pension Of his stacks on the Jews,
. tardy acknowledgment that he was
On the wrong tack He did great in
jsry to . race which in many respects
y an example to al others. But it
II impossible TO keep . good man
down, and Mr.. Ford IL out for 4 new
strike, proposal TO abolish gold and
silver - = monstary basis and sub
stitute IN abstraction which he calls
"AumAn snsrgy." When the project
b examined, what It comes down to
coneTetsly Il our old friend, fiat cur
rsncy, issued by the government and
ineonvertihls. History" Henry Ford
declared sometime ago. ''is bunc."
Such persons invent their own history
~ they 20 along, and 20 comes about
the proverb that history repeats it.
self The old errors and Illusions are
revived by peoples ignorant Of the
experience Of the past and Of the pen
alties Of fAllscious theories whom put
into practices. The dslusion Of ire
dssmabls money has infected society
for centuries. and With every genera
tion Henry Fords pop up, ignorant Of
hhtory. diminishing Il ~ hunc, and
repeating the old costly mistakes.
which . knowledge of ~ ps1t would
saAbls them TO avoid. 5 Henry Ford
has startled the eouztry from time,
y time BY vagaries, sueh - his VI
eIous attacks upon the Jewish race.
his peace mission. his contempt for
history and now his nat money prop
uganda. delusions that are surprising
h . man 30 useful, efficient, success
ful In his chosen line. . matter that
~ knows "from the ground up" He
10 an example Of the danger Of no
learning outside Of his speciality. II
. little learning Is q dangerous thing
no learning whatever Of what history
iRculcates IL no better. Fortunately
the American people rs years ago.
when Henry Ford's back was turned,
went through = campaign Of educa-
ton on rotten money that has served
the country we'll ever since. They
win disappoint him ~ much in his
Nat money compaign - in his crusade
against the Jews.
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1922-02-02

and talked the people wanted him t.
come back with the same old story
II that old bird can get away with IL
for 30 years we ought to hack it fo1
three weeks.
"Did you know" remarked Old Bill
Misgivens, shat the largest locomo-
tive id the world Is in Omaha, Neb.,
operating over the Union Pacific rail-
road? 1t has five acres Of CRATE bars
and four acres Of netting in the smoke
box. 1t takes . man q day and q
half to walk through one Of her cyl
inders. It has an elevator running
up to the headlight, and it takes 10
barrels Of oil to fill it up. 1t takes
two men Is minutes to light one sin
gle light, and it took 10 carpenters
nine months to build her pilot. They
have steam shovels to give her coal.
The tender holds lot carloads of coal.
Every time she exhausts it rains for
so minutes. The engineer uses a
searchlight to look out for signals
and goes blind after running six
months. It takes two astronomers,
with powerful telescopes, to see her
going. The pony wheels are the size
Of the largest turntable in this coun-
try, and = section Of the Pacific cable
il used for her bell cord. It takes -
hours for one Of the sparks 30 fall
and It ID q meteor when it strikes the
earth. When the whistle blows Il
causes m epidemic of deafness in
Deadwood, s. d. Monster trees have
been broken from the wind Of this
train. She runs from Omaha, Neb., to |
Ogden. Utah. \ distance Of $40 miles,
n hour and 81 minutes, making
her tunnels ~ she goes. She hauls
s143 loaded cars and the roundhouse
'orce hold their annual picnic in her
'irebox every summer. When they
rash her boiler it is necessary to
Train the Missouri river at Omaha
She carries 311o pounds of steam
PRESSURE and l240 pounds Of air. The
throttle is pulled by stationary en-
zine in the cab. The lubricator holds |
a barrels Of oil. When she leaves |
he rails there is. IN earthquake in Los
ANGELES four days later. This train |
-uns 20 fast that when it stops still
he is still going ten miles an hour.
The glare Of the headlight can be seen
through 4 hill . half . mile thick.
When she'takes water she drains Lake
danawa and lowers the level Of the
Missouri river 10 feet. And when
'ut everybody, except the Office cat
lad tainted and pussy was making a
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1922-02-02

"Old man." said = valued subscriber
the other day, "you want to keep .
better check on your memory You
have said tie same thing three times
in Is many weeks We know 1t. We
do 1t on purpose. We got onto It BY
reading the advertisement Of q "a
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1922-02-02

nous lecturer. The ad said this man
had delivered the same lecture over
two Thousand times and was now get
ting more money for it than when he
started out, and wherever he went
and talked the people wanted him to
come back with the same old story.
II that old bird can get away with it
for 30 years we ought to hack it for
three weeks.
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1922-02-02

A little girl from Boise was visit
ing at home near Emmett. Every
thing in the country interested her
very much. On butchering day she
was in her glory. Nothing escaped
her. When the work reached GER
tain stage she cried out in amaze
ment: "Myl didn't know pigs had
inner tubes!"
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1922-02-02

"How is the moonshine liquor down
the valley?" asked an acquaintance Of
Old Bill Misgivens. "Tollable poor
stuff" replied Old Bill. while was
taking a dram of it the other day l
stopped some on one Of the dogs and
burhung il it even blistered him!"
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1922-02-02

An Emmett woman says she ca
tell when her husband has won or los
at poker. II he has lost he throw
his pants across the foot Of the bed
II he has won he puts them under hi
pillow.
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1922-02-02

Old Bill Misgivens has spent eight
years developing new species of
canary singing bird. Bill says the old
fashioned kind all use their Threats
for bellows. Humans use their stom-
achs for bellows, in singing. Why
shouldn't birdsl asked Bill, and then
he started out to develop q species
that would. He has succeeded. Bills
new tangled singers have long slim.
nat heads, syiph like necks and big
stomaehs. Old fashioned canaries
have high foreheads, goiter necks and
n.rfect 36 stomachs.