davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington times., 1922-10-01
Cruelty to Scotchmen.

THE origin of the bagpipe was
being discussed, the representa-
tives of different nations eagerly
disclaiming responsibility for the
atrocity. Finally an Irishman
said: "Well, I'll tell you the
truth about it. The Irish in
vented it and sold it to the
Scotch as a joke; and the Scotch
amt seen the joke yet"
The Washington times., 1922-10-01
The Realist.

TITLE Freddy came home one
- night with his clothes full of
holes.
"What in the world has hap
pened to you?" cried his mother.
ooh, we've just been playin'
grocery store and everybody was
something" replied Freddy.
"And | was the cheese"
The Washington times., 1922-10-01
His Weakness.

UWHAT brought you here, my
" poor man." inquired the
prison visitor.
"Well, lady," replied the
prisoner, 81 guess my trouble
started from attending too many
weddin's."
"Ah! You learned to drink
there, or steal, perhaps?"
"No, lady; ! was always the
bridegroom"
The Washington times., 1922-10-01
Police I

"0H, ,Clarice, Pm so worried!
" You know you told me to
put that piece of wedding-cake
under my pillow and I'd dream of
my future husband?
Eyes, dear; didn't it work."
"That's what worries me. l
dreamed of the Seventy-first
Regiment"
The Washington times., 1922-10-01
The Jealous Maid.

MISTRESS-I've lost the key Of
l'l my writing-desk, Marie. Go
and look in the old trunk In the
kitchen-you might find an old
key that will fit.
Marie-It's no use, Madame, I
tried them all long ago, and none
Of them fit.
The Washington times., 1922-10-01
It Was a "Pusher."

It Was a "Pusher."
"VES, num-" sniveled the pan
handler, "there was a time
when I rode in my own carriage"
"My, what a come DOWN.
sympathized the kind-hearted
woman. "And how long has it
been since you rode in your own
carriage?"
Gust forty-five years, num-"
replied the Panhandler, as he
pocketed the proffered dime. ~
was a baby then"
The Washington times., 1922-10-01
Hint to Speeders.

EIRST CONSTABLE-Did yer
git that feller's number?
Second Constable-No, he was
too gold-derned fast fer me.
Thet was a perty pert-lookin' gal
in the back seat, wasn't it?
First Constable-She shure
was!
The Washington times., 1922-10-01
Rural Editors
Scrap Book

A LOT Of water has gone out
~ over the dam since the new
filtration plant was put
into the water works; also a lot
OF dams have gone out over the
water.
The Washington times., 1922-10-01
New Policy.

Union LEADER - Give me
~ $4,000 or I'll call the men
off the job.
Contractor-Why, that's down.
right highway robbery.
Union Leader-Nope, strike
insurance.
The Washington times., 1922-10-01

water.
They had some animated car
toons down to the general store
on Main street last week. Some
fresh eggs which were packed in
them there cartoons, which Is the
new tangled way. Of shippin'
eggs, began to hatch out an If
that amt animated cartoons, not
to say anything about precocious
eggs, why then we don't know
whereof we speak.
The popular phrase with some
of these here city kids that are
summerin' in our midst seems to
be cry an git it.
-
Sid Galloway an his wife have
just returned from a trip across
the continent. They had some
harrowin' experiences comm
across the western desert, almost
dyin' of thirst. Mrs. Galloway
sat down on a rock an COM
menced to cry their plight was
so serious. Her tears collected
in sort of a basin in the rock an
the stone was so hot that the
tears began to boil Sid saw in
this an opportunity Of gettin' a
good supply of sterlized drinkin'
water an by recitin' "Over the
Hills to the Poor House."
Father, Dear Father, Come
Home to Me Now an sech
touchin' poems he kept Mrs. Cal
loway cryin' until they had two
quarts Of drinkin' water.
Lem 2CasWeu has position
down in the city as anaesthesian
for famous surgeon. He gives
the ether while the surgeon
whites away on the subject.
Sort Of a pains-takin' employe,
say we.
Danny Green has an engage
ment to meet all of his creditors
down at the Court House next
Wednesday. Another rendezvous
with debt for Danny, say we.
Some of the institutions of
$ this town are arrangin' to use
soft coal the comm Winter an
we suppose all of our citizens
will soon be followin' SCOT.
In the days of old although
some of the court ladies might
have neglected their early educa-
ton they made it up later by
studyin' knights.
There was a little girl,
An she had q little curl
Right in the middle of her fore
head.
When she had powdered she was
very, very pale,
When she had not she was florid.
Anon.
If we could get hold of the
poet who writ the above he would
have his license revoked, but
after leavin' the poem he ran so
fast we couldn't git his license
number.
Maybe that show at the Opr'y
House last week was mellow
drama, as the management said
in its advertisements, but il
seemed like rotten drama to US.
, Very hiss-trionic to say the least
say we.
The Washington times., 1922-10-01
Appreciating the Views.
His Limit.

His Limit.
UVOU refuse to buy me a new
costume! (Sob) Yet you
used to say you'd 60 through fire
and wator for me"
"But, my darling! I never
said I'd 60 through the bank
ruptcy court"
The Washington times., 1922-10-01
A Few Good Ones
Well Raised.


A NEGRO nanny had family
IA of well-behaved boys, and one
day her mistress asked, "Sally,
how did you raise your boys 50
well"
"Ah'll tell you, missus,"
answered Sally. "Ah raise dem
boys with a barrelstave, an All
raise 'em frequent"
Approaching the Views.
MRS. NEwRICH (returning
nA from tour)-We went very
swiftly all the way.
Caller-But travelling in fast
auto, how could you get any idea
of the country!
Mrs. Newrich-Oh, bought .
lot of picture postcards every
place we stopped at.
The Washington times., 1922-10-01

Lem ,Caswell has a position
down in the city as anaesthesian
for a famous surgeon. He gives
the ether while the surgeon
whites away on the subject.
Sort Of a pains-takin' employe,
say we.
The Washington times., 1922-10-01

Maybe that show at the Opr'y
House last week was mellow
drama, as the management said
in its advertisements, but it
seemed like rotten drama to US.
Very hiss-trionic to say the least,
say we.
The Washington times., 1922-10-01

Danny Green has an engage
ment to meet all Of his creditors
down at. the Court House next
Wednesday. Another rendezvous
with debt for Danny, say we.
The Washington times., 1922-10-01

The popular phrase with some
of these here city kids that are
summerin' in our midst seems to
be cry an git it.
The Washington times., 1922-10-01

Some of the institutions of
$ this town are arrangin' to use
soft coal the comm Winter an
we suppose all of our citizens
will soon be followin' SCOT.
The Washington times., 1922-10-01

In the days of old although
some of the court ladies might
have neglected their early educa-
ton they made it up later by
studyin' knights.
The Washington times., 1922-10-01

If we could get hold of the
poet who writ the above he would
have his license revoked, but
after leavin' the poem he ran SO
fast we couldn't git his license
number.
The Morning Tulsa daily world. [volume] (Tulsa, Okla.) 1919-1927, 1922-12-03
Kidnapping TWO Deputies,
Liner OutSpeedS TugbOat
Escaping With Booze Cargo

NEW YORK, Dec. Out
speeding the police tug Manhat-
tan, which had been ordered to
overtake her. the Cunard liner
Assyria tonight flashed past
Sandy Hook and headed for
Scotland carrying with her IL
sos eases of whisky deported by
federal prohibition agents, and
two deputy sheriffs alleged TO
have been "kidneped" while ex-
ecuting an order to seize part OF
the cargo.
when tho Manhattan gave
chase the Assyria already wHs
well down the bay on her way to
Scotland The police boat was
under orders OF Deputy Chief In
spector CahilaD, to whom he
sheriff had appealed for aid,
The deputies had gone abroad
10 execute a writ OF replcvin
against the 1000 cases issued In
behalf of the Alph Drug COM
pany. Prohibition officials re-
fused to honor the writ; threat
ened to arrest the sheriff's dep
uties; placed two prohibition
agents abroad to guard the cargo
overseas, and the Assyria pulled
out.
The Manhattan, which had
been sent out with orders TO res
cue the deputy sherlffs "by force
IL necessary" was too slow for
The Morning Tulsa daily world. [volume] (Tulsa, Okla.) 1919-1927, 1922-12-03

tho liner. her captain reported
whom he returned to the Battery.
The whisky had remained in
customs storage since 1921 when
1t was shipped by Heilhorn and
company, distillers of Glasgow,
Scotland. to an agent in this coun-
try. II was not seized by the
prohibition officials until recent
~ II was consigned by the
agent to the Alph Drug company
and another firm. both Of which
had permits TO import and dis.
tribute wine.
The chase OF the Assyrla last
ed more than an hour when
the Manhattan, empty-handed,
returned to her berth, Sheriff
Percival Maggie and a score OF
deputies, with as many prohibit
ton agents, customs officials
and attorneys for the Cunard
line were waiting for him.
Sheriff Nagle Immediately an
nouuced he would proceed with
the case on the basis that tho
Assyria's captain had deliberate
iy "shanghaied' the deputies,
Acting on wireless instructions
from the authorities, tho pilot
boat New York took the two
deputies from the Assyria at the
three mile limit and brought them
back 20 the battery, shortly before
midnight.
The Morning Tulsa daily world. [volume] (Tulsa, Okla.) 1919-1927, 1922-12-03
TIGER REVIEWS
APPEAL TO u. S
Says America Must Even
tually Return to Fin
ish Up Her Job
ST. LOUIS CHEERS W. W.
Mention of Wilson's Name Is
Signal for Prolonged Out
burst of Applauding

oDEoN, ST. LOUIS, Dec, a.
Georges Clemenceau, the Tiger" of
France, declared in an address here
this afternoon that France was
against Germany regardless of
what Tom, Dick or Harry may think
about it."
He fought back at his critics, who
accuse him OF militarism and said he
had helped to overthrow Napoleon
III,
Z. s. Partly Miiitaristic.
The United States, with the best
frontiers in the world demanded
100000 tons OF the warships at the
arms conference, he said,
Sometimes / think there are
some Americans who are little mil
itaristic," he said. Time alone will
tell"
In fairness It must be admitted,
that Germany has been better in
peace than she was in war" Clemen-
ceau said, hut democracy is not so
very strong there"
Now what is the matter with
America 2" the Tiger" asked.
"You did not have 10 go to Europe
In 1917" he said, but that is the
most glorious page OF your history" p"
He said he did not want OF tell
Americans how to run their affairs.
Left Task Undoue.
TN a nutshell ClenAnceau con-
tinued you went away from Europe
and left your task undone."
ASK the wounded soldiers X
France Is militaristic," he asked.
Some people In France told him
he would be badly received in Amer
lea. NJ. Clemenceau said. He said
that he knew America loved France
and that he knew better than TO be-
lieve the assertions.
II don't know whether America is
represented at Lausanne or not ne
continued. "She went and then she
did not go. | don't know exactly
what an observer is. though l am an
admirer OF great ideas. | don't be-
lieve in the league Of nations as
method OF ending war.
of you choose 10 get into the so
clety of nations, that Is your bust
ness. Whatever America does is all
fright, but you may be assured that
sooner or later you VIII have 10
come"
Wilson's Name Cbeered,
The great audience cheered for
nearly Two minutes whom Clemen-
ceau referred to Woodrow Wilson
and his II points,
You can not be great today ana
small tomorrow" he said.
Clemenceau reiterated that Amer
lea must intervene in European az
fairs
'The IA points were the soul OF
America" he said.
a few minutes later he brought
the audience 10 its feet when he ex-
claimed; 1T
mo one could have labored with
a greater heart than woodrow VIII
SON"
The former war premier declared
that the treaty Of Versailles was not
TOO hard on Germany ana that
France has since abandoned o1 per
cent of her demands,
CIemenceau left shortly before
midnight on a special train for Bal
| timore. He was scheduled TO make
a five-minute speech 10 members
OF the Society of Friends at Rich
mond. Indiana, in the morning. lie
arrived in Baltimore about 9 o'clock
Monday morning.
The Morning Tulsa daily world. [volume] (Tulsa, Okla.) 1919-1927, 1922-12-03
B0LEN ASSAILS HARRISON And hep
KING FILES SUIT TO DUST SEA VEL
Another System
To PrOl0ng Life
Found BY Doctor

NEW YORK, Dec. 2,-Youth- =
full exuberance at 100 without
monkey glands, no more bald
heads, no wrinkles, no false teeth,
no crutches and active support
tby men) OF the short skirt in
women's dress styles are promised
today by DR.. c. Il. Everett Field,
director OF the radium institute,
as the result of radioactive treat
ment.
Doctor Field believes that the
treatment will be perfected with
in the next few days and that 1882
will see men and women ignoring
completely the biblical span OF
three score and ten as the allot-
ed period for human life.
Doctor Field quoted DIR. Barton
ScammeN, president of the Brit
tsh Radium society, as saying:
These methods OF infusing life
and vigor have long been applied
to the soil and are now adaptable
for humanity"
The Morning Tulsa daily world. [volume] (Tulsa, Okla.) 1919-1927, 1922-12-03
STATEMENTS SCORED
Seaver Led People to Believe
Dry Laws Wouldn't Be En-
forced, King Charges
SEAvER HAS NO COMMENT
County Attorney Has Moth
ing to Say" on Attempt to
Remove Him From Office

Clifford w. King. assistant at
torney-general representing the
state OF Oklahoma. tllcd suit in dis
trlct court Saturday afternoon
against County Attorney w. F,
Seayog asking for his immediate
suspension frqjn office for official
misconduct and refusal to enforce
tho prohibitory and other criminal
statutes OF the state OF Oklahoma"
District Judge Albert G. Hunt
stated Saturday night he granted
King's request that the hearing be
held in district court here December
10. date that allows 5cayer the
legal period OF 10 days In which 10
make preparations for his appear.
ance. This hearing ig TO cover only
the demanded suspension the custer
hearing 10 be held at later date.
Ends Two-Day Probe.
The filing Of Kings petition comes
on the heels OF a two-day investiga-
tion by tho assistant attorney
general following soavers public
announcement that $50 far as | am
concerned. liquor can flow down
the streets OF the city OF Tulsa" and
his declaration that tho people OF
Tulsa do not want the prohibitiory
laws enforced. together with the
Wholesale dismissal of cases against
alleged mOOnsniners ana boot
l3ggcrg.
Kings petition further sets out
that Marie Harmon and Raymond
sharp, charged with the murder Of
Homer Nida September 20, 1920,
were released on Scaver's order, and
that the county attorney also has
dismissed several cases against auto
mobile thieves.
Tho cases on which King bases his
accusation against Seaver are stated
in detail In tho petition, which
covers about twenty typewritten
pages and is divided into three
counts.
II is charged that seaver "openly,
notoriously and publicly declared
that no would not make any further
efforts as county attorney 10 en-
force the laws OF the state OF Okla
homa against the sale. manufacture.
giving away or otherwise furnishing
OF intoxicating liquors In said Tulea
county, that the conduct and action
Of the public showed him public
sentiment OF Tulsa county did not
CONTINUED ON PAGE NiSE
The Morning Tulsa daily world. [volume] (Tulsa, Okla.) 1919-1927, 1922-12-03
Don't Poor
Riddles Here
BeDisappOinted

Three more weeks until Christ
mas.
People are beGlnning 90 study
their calendars, figuring time
they have 10 buy gifts and the
money they have or viii have 10
buy these gifts The Tulsa
county humane society has some
several hundred Gf there IL the
need, and the money! gifts OF
Christmas baskets to get ready
By December 25, and it's workers
are beginning 10 study their call
'nGaTs. figuring time they have
20 buy these gifts. and the money
they have or will have 10 buy
the gifts,
They don't have very mucn
money now, that's certain. How
much they viii have depends al
together upon Tulsa. II has been
Tulsa's generous custom 20 re-
member it's "other half at
Christmas time with gifts OF
money that the humane society
transforms into miracle Christ
mae baskets. These gifts have
been made 20 The Worlds Emp
~ Stocking fund AZ the name
implies. u Is the little children
that The World had primarily In
view when the fund was started.
II Is 10 make a Christmas for the
klddies who will have no Christ
mas otherwise. that the Empty
Stocking fund is opened now.
All gifts should be sent 10 the
Empty Stocking fund, The Tulsa
Daily World.
The Morning Tulsa daily world. [volume] (Tulsa, Okla.) 1919-1927, 1922-12-03
Telephone User
Awarded $1,000
For Bad Service

MINNEAPOLIS, Dec. a
George 3. Grimes. prominent at
tornoy. IN clated over n verdict Of
$1,000 damages given him hy
jury in what he claims is the only
case of the Kind on record IN the
country. where n telephone COM
p1ny has been found guilty OF Civ
ing a subscriber poor service and
been ordered to pay the subscribe
er for "lo@ OF time and annoy
nnce."
"For tho past six years have
been hearing the same old words
such as tho line Ia busy they
don't answer sorry. but the
party hung up and other phrases
repeated to cover up poor serv-
Ice and inexcuhable delay" Grimes
said
Grimes sued the telephone COM
pany for $4,000 for damages al
legged to have suffered over peri
cd OF ak years for poor service.
Tho company announced today
the case would be carried to the
highest court in tho land" as to
let the verdict stand would "open
the doors to endless litigation
brought by telephone subscribers
over minor and unavoidable lapses
in service that no telephone COM
Dany or management could al
ways avoid"
The Morning Tulsa daily world. [volume] (Tulsa, Okla.) 1919-1927, 1922-12-03
BORAH is NAMED
NEW GROUP HEAD
Ladd of North Dakota Is
Also Elected to Execu-
tive Committee
| NEW BLOC ORGANIZED
La Toilette Opens Meeting
With Warning That party"
Must Proceed Cautiously

WASHINGTON, Dec. 2.--SenatoT
william l.. Borah Of Idaho was
elected this afternoon as chairman
OF the executive committee of the
progressive congressional group,
composed OF both democratic and
republican legislators.
Others elected 20 the executive
committees were Senator Ladd. re.
publican. Nash Dakota. Senator
Sheppard. democrat, Texas; Ashurat
democrat, Arizona; Representative
Woodruff. republican. Michigan
Beck. republican, Wisconsiin, LO-
gan, democrat. South Carolina, and
Collins, democrat, Mississippi.
BY the Associated Press
WASHINGTON, Dec. 2.-Plans for
promotiRn OF progressive sentiment
and policies throughout tho nation
were made today at concluding
meetings OF the two days conclave
of progressives called by Senator
La Toilette, republican. Wisconsin
and Representative Huddlestou
democrat, Alabama, under the aus
pices Of the peoples legislative ser
| vice
Resolutions declaring for con
tlnuation OF the nGw progressive
movement which Is to be actiyely
translated into legislation through
the bipartisan progressive bloc OF
! congress formed yesterday were
adopted during two aessions iOdal
! OF the public conference and ad-
dresses were made by dozen
leaders IN liberal movements.
FIay Many Officials.
Presentation Of detailed legisla-
tive and economic program was not
attempted. but spearcrs at today''
"Open forum" and at the closing
dinner tonight proposed a multitude
Of reforms and frayeG past and pre-
sent government officials and
policies A feature OF the dinner to-
night, attended by about eight hum
dred persons was another attack
upon Attorney DauEherB
By Samuel CntcTmycr. New York at
tOrney
Senator la Toilette presided over
the open sessions today and speeches
were delivered by Presidpn
Gompers OF the American Feder1,
tion Of Labor. Governor Blaine OF
Wisconsin, Senator Norris republic.
an. Nebraska, Senator BrookhaFt
republican, Iowa; senator8-eleci
| Wheeler, democrat. Montana, and
| Frazier. republican, North Dakota
and Representative Frear, republic.
an. Wisconsin, and Sinclair, re,
publican. North Dakota,
Resolutions adopted unanimously
by the convention declared that the
movement was "nonpartisan' and
| designed primarily to promote pro-
/ gressive legislation. Other resolu,
| CONTINUED on PAGE NINE
The Morning Tulsa daily world. [volume] (Tulsa, Okla.) 1919-1927, 1922-12-03
Two Killed IN WRECK.

FRESNO, Cal, Dec. 1.-TWO per-
sons were killed and several were
seriously injured when AtcnisOn.
TOesb & Santa Fe passenger train
No 22, eastbound, plunged into an
open switch a few miles west OF
Bakersfield, early tonight.
The dead are CAlifornians Sew
eral passengers and the conductor
Nsra badly shz kan IN
The Morning Tulsa daily world. [volume] (Tulsa, Okla.) 1919-1927, 1922-12-03
THE WEATHER

TULSA. Dec. 2-Msxlmum. S., mini
mum as: south wind. clear.
OKLAHOMA-sunday ana Monday isH'
not much change in temperature
KANsAs-Gensrslly fair sunday and
Monday, no important change In tempera-
tuTs.
The Morning Tulsa daily world. [volume] (Tulsa, Okla.) 1919-1927, 1922-12-03
MORE EXECUTIONS
FEARED IN GREECE
Prince Andrew on Trial
by Revolutionists for
Part in War
BRITAIN IS IGNORED
Protests Fail to Aid Brother
of Former King Constan-
tine; Denies Charge

LONDON, Dec, 2.-prlnce An
drew has been sentenced to per-
petual banishment by the court
martial sitting at Athens, ac-
cordlng to a Reuter- dispatch. In
addition, he will suffer degra-
dation IN the army.
ATHENS, Dec. 2.--Ignorlng the
protest Of Britain and Italy the
Greek revolutionary committee to-
day arraigned Prince Andrew,
brother OF former King Constantine,
before a military tribunal. chatg-
ing him with disobedience while
commanding an army corps In the
Turco- Greek war in Asia Minor.
(Note: A censorship prevented
transmission OF press messages out
OF Athens on Thursday. There was
apparently a relaxation on the part
OF the Greek revolutionary officials
today, as dispatches were received
without interruption telling OF the
arralgnment of Prince Andrew)
General Vlachopclos !s chairman
of the extraordinary war council
that Is trying Andrew. The hearing
is taking place in the chamber OF
deputies. Troops are on guard
outside, but the city is quiet.
Andrew was allowed TO testify In
his own behalf. He defends all his
actions on the military field and de-
clares that Greece was always firs,
in his heart and mind.
The Morning Tulsa daily world. [volume] (Tulsa, Okla.) 1919-1927, 1922-12-03

by the Associated Press state Wire.
M'ALESTER. Dec. Z.-The inter-
est Of delegates 10 the Oklahoma
CONTINUED OK PAGE NINE
The Morning Tulsa daily world. [volume] (Tulsa, Okla.) 1919-1927, 1922-12-03
No Direct Appeal Made.

LAUSANNE. Dec. 2.--Lord Cur
zon visited former Premier VENICE
los OF Greece today, following re-
ceipt OF word that Prince Andrew
had been arrested AT Athens and
SeNRTrArTEn - pea" .'fNs
The Morning Tulsa daily world. [volume] (Tulsa, Okla.) 1919-1927, 1922-12-03
BY the Assooiated Presr

PARIS, Dec. 2.---The deepest anx-
Iety was feh tonight by Prince
Christopher OF Greece for the fate OF
his brother, Prince Andrew, whose
trial before the revolutionary COM
mittee in Athens began today.
No News Of trial.
He spent the entire day in attempt
ing TO get some word as % the pro-
Sress OF the trial, but at o'clock
tCnight all the official sources help
ing him had failed 10 throw any
light on the situation.
Prince and Princess Christopher,
who arrived IN Paris week ago
with Queen Mother Olga. have re-
tanned their suite on the stea mship
Majestic, sailing for New York on
December g. In spite OF the deyel-
opments. but VIII postpone their y!ait
20 America Indefinitely II the trtai
results adversely 10 Andrew.
No Direct Appeal Made.
Christopher declareS that n An
drew's life n placed IN jeopardy by
the verdict of the revolutionary
court. he will devote his whole time
| 20 trying 10 save him.
The queen mother and Christie
| pher have already made every pos
s. 10 effort on behalf OF Andrew.
4 All the members OF the family have
carefully avoided any direct appeal
Ito the revolutionary committee,
/ fearing such a move would only
/ further enrage the committee mem
hers.
The Morning Tulsa daily world. [volume] (Tulsa, Okla.) 1919-1927, 1922-12-03

Home buyers are safest Wien titlss are
guaranteed and deals closed by Title
Guarantee a Truat ca S~--''---- --~-