The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1922-01-26

T stinketh ike q polecaI
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The pity Of the social and economic
order is that when youth would EMO,
the worth while things Of life it has
not the means, and when the means
is earned then youth is gone.
The organist who plays the wedding
| march at the marriage of Princess
Mary of England will receive $500
The Liberty Four orchestra Of EN-
NETT could do better JOB for one
fourth the money.
A little boy sat down the other day
and wrote a newsy letter to his
grandmother. This is the 14etter
"Dear Grandma: have sold my pup
and joined the church. Lovingly,
Paul"
Somehow those blizzard items from
southern California suggest to one
that the funniest sight in the world
must be 4 California real estate agent
being ordered by his wife to cover up
the flowers for the night.
q . .
One man says in . hundred years
women will be armed with rifles and
fighting in the armies. Then they
will lose. Arm the women Of ma
ton with frying pans, ROLLING pins and
skillets, with line Of squalling in
fantry in the cradles, and they will
dominate this old world.
In a Missouri county seat town the
tax collector has put up sign in his
Office which reads: "No swearing in
this ROOM" Taxpaying ut the county
office in Emmett would
have been speeded up considerably II
4 sign like this had been put here:
please step outside before fainting."
An Emmett man who is stickler
for etiquet, wonders which wife took
precedence wien Solomon introduced
his TO- wives to the queen Of Sheba.
that's easy. If. Solomon was
half the diplomat we think he must
have been, he rounded up the 700
wives and with 4 grand sweep Of the
hand, remarked, "Quennie, meet Mrs.
Solomon"
A salesman Of spectacles and eye
glasses was peddling his wares in the
he outskirts Of town the other day.
approaching a man, he told his pro-
,pective customer that he would "like
o At you with new pair Of glasses.
4 never wear glasses" replied the
"But the mark across
FOUR nose between the eyes," persist
ID the salesman, Indicates that you
,ave.' "Nope," drawled the other,
we all drink moonshine' from glass
ars down here"
Flows your brothers rheumatism
" now?" asked an Acquaintance of
Did Bill Misgivens. "Well," replied
I'D Bill, "pears like it's better. His
made up some liniment
ut Of moonshine ticker and one thing
nd another, and / reckon she didn't
weaken it down enough. At any rate,
. rubbed it on his legs and 16 sec
nds later jumped through the window
nd lit out. hitting the high places
or the tall timber, yelling in an un-
nown tongue at every jump. Took
i'm three days to get back, and he
avs that either the exercise or the
niment cured him and he don't know
'hich."
: A man who is suing, or being sued,
,r divorce, complains that his wife
item woke him up at night to read
oetry to him. A wife is pretty sure '
wake her husband during the night. !
Te are not sure that one who did SO
'r the purpose OF reading bit OF I
,rse abound would not be preferable t
one who wakes hi mup to inquire i
here and with whom he spent the q
,ening, and Why he stayed out SO
tie. There may be, and probably
e. husbands so fecund in the matter
improvisation that wife's ques-
ons never bother them. But we are
ank to confess that ks,-s 1uI1 out :
satisfactory rejoinders.
Q Q .
That the German is ingenious near e
everybody knows-but the Teller
ade 4 fizzle that invented paper
,thes. The need was past debating 4
ID the idea was a beaut-that set
back quarter for bran new Sun
y suit! 9
We know the paper collar was (,
sssinK in its day-when Teller got
sweating he could throw the thing
ray. And I've nearly died A-lA6ing &
len = gang of little brats would par N