davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1922-03-09

SO we'll tiidt Iho lcScucTS tiliih ~
can't be.
In Latin class we are so bright,
Miss Mccartney thinks we study all
night,
We answer our questions right away,
And translate hard sentences without
delay.
In Algebra I'd have you know,
Quadratic equations we do just so;
Mr.. Brechbill will tell you we factor
SO fast
And know all the rules from the first
to the last.
If you doubt US in Science just ask Mr..
Duff,
He'll tell you the Eighth Grade is just
the stuff,
And as for English we're as bright As
can be,
Always know our lessons to please
Miss McCaffrey.
In Sewing and Cooking our girls just
glory,
But they couldn't do well without Miss
Flory.
And about Manual Training, just con-
suit Mr.. Stull,
He'll be apt to tell you our boys are
not dull.
Nothing but a well known lesson will
pass,
Thus, the Freshies like Miss Shipley's
History Class.
And in Singing period every Thursday
Mr.. Stull does seldom look forlorn.
Now that the Freshies you know so
well,
I'm going to ask you the truth to tell;
When some folks say we're the green
est of the green,
Don't you think those people are the
meanest of the mean?
Mary Roddy, '25
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1922-03-09

Slim:Why is Charles Stull's hail
like Wanamaker's store?
Sam: Because it covers block.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1922-03-09
DIAGNOSTICIAN

Specialist In chronic diseases.
l make study and treatment
of any kind of disease the fam
lily Doctor is not curing. Tell
me your trouble and I'll tell
you what is your disease. and
what can be done for it. I'll
send blank and specimen case.
Give me your name.
HA0ERsToWN. MD.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1922-03-09

Mary had little lamb,
She liked it very we'll,
She fed it stick of dynamite
And blew it all to-little bits of
pieces.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1922-03-09
The Hero

Updike stood on the railroad track,
The train was coming fast,
Updike stepped off the railroad track
The train went whizzing past.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1922-03-09
A Dream

Our Freshman Glass is a studious
crowd,
We never laugh or talk out loud,
But study and know our lessons, you
see,
So we'll that the teachers think it
can't be.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1922-03-09

Mr.. White: How you feelin this
evening jolly?
Jolly:I's feelin fine boss but Arthur's
real low.
Mr.. White: Arthur who?
Jolly: Our-thermometer.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1922-03-09

Jolly: Say, as was going down the
street de other day saw an automo-
bile run into a dog and knock three
wheels off his tail.
Slim: What you talkin' about dogs
tail amt got wheels. A wagons got
wheels.
Jolly: Well, the dogs tail was 4
Vaughn.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1922-03-09

The train was coming fast,
Updike stepped off the railroad track,
The train went whizzing past.
Miss Flory: Cecilia, wouldn't like
to be you.
Cecilia: Why, Miss Flory?
Miss Flory: Why to be in love with
Franklin and carry all my mullins up
to him.
Cecilia: Well, I wouldn't want you
to be.
Miss Flory: Why?
Cecilia Feeling sad at the thought)
Because you might cut me out.
Ham: You ought to see my little son
He's only ten months old and is be-
ginning to walk and talk.
My sister has boy in his third year
that weighs $50 pounds, is over six
feet tall, and can kick a soccer ball 100
yards.
Ham: You say he's in his third year
and is over six feet tall?
Huckleberry:Yes, Sir, his third year
in Thurmont High School. His names
Spoonie Knott.
When the Seniors said they were dig
niied,
Why really and truly, I laughed TIL l
cried.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1922-03-09

Echoes from Mr.. Jet Black Whites
Carnival Minstrels.
Mr.. White: How you feelin dis morn
in Lucas?
Lucas: Jest like ten dollars and cost
Mr.. White: How you feelin like ten
dollels and cost?
Lucas: Fine, boss, fine.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1922-03-09
No. 3
Philokalean Number
Nutty Stuff

Nutty Stuff
Miss Mccartney (In Literary Socie-
ty): Mr.. President, please appoint the
judges.
Donald: ! have.
Snitz: Miss Mccartney, what have
you been drinking, corn whiskey.
Where did you get it?
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1922-03-09

Mr.. White:Wouldn't you like to live
your married life over again?
Ham: Who, me? After all dat I've
gone through wifi. Never no more, no
time.
Mr.. White: Don't talk dat way.
Your wife's a splendid woman. At
least, dat's how she strides me.
Ham: And with a washboard, dat's
how she strike; me.
Mr.. White:But, she says she misses
you terribly when you're gone.
Ham: Yes she shore does miss me
when Pm gone, but oh baby how she
do strike me when I'm home.
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1922-11-09
Even Kentucky May Ignore Duel

other with pistols at II PAGES. Tne
crowd cheered Justify.
Public opinion then turned against
ducllng and il was discarded in Ken.
lucky.
Lawyers fought more duels tnan any
other class Of people, with legislators
a close second.
One Of the most famous Kentucky
duelos was that between William j..
Graves and Jonathan Cney, both meme
oers of congress, fought IN 1898. There
was no quarrel between them. but
Graves challenged Cilley because the
latter refused to accept a message from
Graves Graves, carried by a newspape,
editor Cilley had quarreled with.
Cilley died from rifle bullet fired
by Graves. He died, expressing high
est regard for the man who shot him.
Henry Clay fought two duels. one
with Humphrey Marshall, in 1905 in
which both We're slightly wounded, and
one with John Randolph, IN 1926. tne
men We're friends and Randolph fired to
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1922-11-09
NEW MONEY SOUGHT
FOR EDUCATION FUND

New money, as well as payments on
the second installment now due of the
Christian education fund of tho NJ. Il.
Church, South, will be sought by the
conference secretry-tearsurcr of that
cause ii is announced by w. +. Hogan,
of Nashville, Tenn, treasurer of the
Board of Education of that denomina.
ton which fostered a campaign for
s33, 600, 900 ON behalf of its church
schools and colleges.
Secretary y-treasurers for annual con
ference territory are making encourag-
ing reports, said MIR. Hogan, of new
money which has been pledged to the
cause of Christian education. IL. G.
Morehead of Arkansas Methodism, re
ports the collection, on one trip alone,
of one $500 check on a five year pledge,
and $4,000 new money; J. NJ. Morse, of
n recent report, secured S19.050 new
money, which he expects to increse to
$4,000 w. O. Good of the Western
North Carolina conference reports $50.
600 new money received during the
past year in his territory. Similar re-
ports from other Of the thirty-eight an
nual conference divisions of Southern
Methodism, said Mr.. Hogan, indicate
that the conference officers who are
directing the work are on the job and
will leave no stone unturned to col
lect the money subscribed during the
Christian education campaign. and to
solicit additional funds for this cause
which is important To 81 denomination
al schools and colleges in Southern
Methodist territory.
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1922-11-09
Italian
Leader Is Worlds
Youngest Premier

covered with wounds and medals and
bearing iu his heart a bitter hatred
lor ,hc lia'iau radicals who had failed
their country In It's time OF need.
lie found the Italian Industrial and
economic life upset. Unemployment
was rife and Italys great economic
safety valve-emigration 10 the United
Sotcs-had been cut orr.
These conditions had prepared fcr
tile spawning ground for bulshcyist
propaganda. Agitators. many OF them
inspired by funds sen, from abroad.
were at work in all OF luly's indus.
trial centers and were gaining many
converts
Then the germ OF the Fascist OF.
ganiaation was born in Mussolini's mind.
He began handing together his form.
er atmy comrades IN political groups.
sworn to oppose the rcd flag both at
the voting booths and through direct
action" with sticks stones or rifles.
BY the beginning OF this year Mus.
solini had organized 100000 Young men,
all ready to do his bidding.
In answer the political extremists
called a general strike Aussolni de.
feaied the strike boy putting his ZOO.
oeo followers into the jobs the strikers
had quit.
This intensified the bitterness be.
tween the bolshevistic elements and
the Fascist. open fighting broke out.
At the kings request Alussoim. this
summer demobliiged his forrUa fn aid
"a o., 11d not
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1922-11-09

LOUISVILLE. Ky. -- State'offlcials
n Kentucky need not swear they
never participated in duels, If a propos-
ed measure becomees law at the next
cs.slature. This would eliminate ref
cronce TO dueluug from The oath ot Of
f.ce administered.
Those fayor,ng the change want %
show the world that "ihe dark aud
!oody ground" Is as modern and law.
abiding as the rost of these United
States.
Duels outshouc stump speeches iu
carly day politics But since 1Si9 they
have passed out Of fashion in connec.
tion with vote getting,
Henry G.. Pope and John T. Gray.
Louisville men, fought the last duel
~ consequence that year shot guns
loaded with single balls, were fired at
~ paoes. Pope was mortaly wounded.
Lawyers Fought Most
Later thut year 2u attorney named
smith and % school teacher named Sing.
ui. satisfied honor hy wouudng each
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1922-11-09

"demobolize' his political power
When premier after premier failed
20 establish cabinet that could last
Mussolni came forward and now VIII
Try TO stand whore older and better
trained political leaders fen
Mussom is The SON OF am iron work.
er. Eui he Is versed in music. ant
and literature and speaks several lau-
euagcs
lie has been a school teacher. editor,
writer of stories. a rowing laborer.
The name OF his organi2ation-Fos.
cisti-comes from the Latin word "fae.
ces' bundle which originally referred
to the bundles OF rods carried 10y the
old Roman hctors.
Mussolnis advent to power is Ger.
tain to have "a farrcochIng effect uu
ltaly's International relations.
His first step probably viii be abro
cation OF the troateics between Italy
and Jugoslavia parttloning the Ardia
tiot coast. Mussolnio also wishes ia
annex Malta. II is reported thlnp
which would involve Italy in u gray,
controversy with Great Britain
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1922-11-09

miss. This affected Clay and a recon-
ciliatiou followed
The Alexander GIamlton-Aaron Burr
duel fought in 1904, in which Hamilton
was shot after he had fired into the
air, really turned American against
this practice. For half century more
though. society tolerated this mode of
settling affairs of honor, despire its
banning by law. y man challenged
either had to accept of be ostracized.
But TO duelling, say authorities. civ
ilization is indebted for its modern in.
strumont of justice. the court of law.
And prize fighting must point TO the
duello as its parent
All quarrels Of the nobility were set
tied by battle in the days when robbcr
barons We're coming into fashion in
Europe. The courts were arranged for
the benef.a Of spectators. and kings
and their courts were judges. knights
fought ON horseback, using lances. Les
or pole1Xec
ser persons hattled 30 ont with knives
OF The past week.
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1922-11-09
PLANS COMPLETE
FOR DEDICATION
Vets HOSPITAL
Legion Department Chaplain
Will Open Ceremony;
Mayor VIII Deliver
Welcome Address.

MUSKOGEE-Final plans have been
announced for the ceremony of laying
the cornerstone and dedicating the Sol
diers Memorial Hospital here Novem.
Der II. The American Legion will have
charge of the ceremonies, which will
feature the Armistice Day exercises.
At $3.50 a. m. all ex-service men will
march in a parade through the business
district. All eX-service men of the
state have been invited to Muskogee
to participate in the ceremonies and
march in the parade, which will start
from Cherokee and Broadway.
IL. Il. Fell Of Ardmore. chairman of
the Soldiers Relief Commission and
past department commander of the
American Legion, will preside over the
ceremonies. The ceremony proper will
he opened at II a. m. by the depart
ment chaplain of the American lie
gion, Rev. Samuel q. Rogers OF St'l'
water. At exactly Ii o'clocq All heads
win be bowed during thirty seconds OF
nIl'INe III hollol VI utNcdoV" Noi'i' ''"'''
Mayor George II. Walker OF Muskogee
viii deliver the welcome address, fol-
lowed by an address by Horace III.
Ilaean of Tulsa, past department com.
nander OF the American Legion, and a
member OF the Soldiers Relief Com
mission which built the hospital. Dud
ley c. Monk, of Okmulgee department
commander of the American Legion
will make the dedicatory address and
lay the cornerstone. The NIuskoseo
high school band will furnish music
for the occasion.
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1922-11-09
ICE MAKERS TO MEET
KANSAS CITY NOV. s

KANSAS CITY, MO.-One of the
Oldest organizations in the Southwest,
the Western Ice Manufacturers Asso-
citation will hold their twenty-fifth an.
nual convention in this city November
s, and 10 at the Coats House, Alonzo
=. Clark head of the Convention Blu.
reau announced today.
This convention usually draws about
two hundred and fifty of the leading
ice manufacturers in this section. Due
to the fact that this will be the silver
jubilee of the organization the attend.
ance his year is eNeptced to almost
double this number. States which con
tain members Of the association are
Missouri, Kansas, Iowa. Colorado, Ne
braska, Oklahoma, Texas and Arkan
saS.
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1922-11-09
His Political Career Begins
When Way Is Fought to
Head Of Socialist Party;
Edits Paper

GoME.-Onc of the worlda Youngest
political headers today .s couisuug
here with king Victor Emanuel ON
the formation OF now italian cabinet
In which ho will act as rormlcr and
besides will take On his youthful should.
ers three separate portfolios.
he BE- B,niu Aussouui. 3s-beforc
The war leader OF Italian Socialists
and now head of the most bitter anti.
ildica body .n The world. the Fas.
,isti
Mussolim political career started
with he fought his way to the leader.
ship of ihc Italian Socialist party. lie
h,camo editor of their newspaper organ
"Avanti" That was Immediately be-
fore the outbreak of the World War
n 1914.
When the war came German SO.
c.alists voted a. bloc to support the
iatherland In it, military adventures.
When Italy entered the lists on the
side uf tho allies. Mussolini wished
his followers TO give the same support
10 italy
BROKE With Socialists.
The italian Socialists refused Then
MussolInio broke with them. lie enlist
"a IN the army.
The eN-Socialist leader came hack
from th- t--. -ssar the armistics
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1922-11-09
ESTABLISH BOOK
DEPOSITORY IN THE WEST

on recent trip TO the Pacific slope
where hereTresented the publishing in.
terests of his church before annual con.
ference meetings. DIR. A. J. Lamar, sen.
ior publishing agent for his denomi.
nation, established a book store in San
Francisco in order to serve the rapidly
increasing trade of that section. DIR. W.
II. Nelson, editor Of the Pacific Meth.
odist Advocate win be in charge Of the
new plant. DR.. Lamar slater that every
indication pointed to success for the
new venture. Bishop II. NJ. Du Bose,
bishop in charge Of Methodist interest
for the frontier and border sections,
heartily approved the enterprise which
will draw patronage from Mcthodists
in California, Arizona, oregon. Mon.
tana, Washington and Idaho.
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1922-11-09

NEWKIRk American Legion mem
bers from the six posts of Kay county
will gather in Newkirk Thursday night
for their quarterly banquet and coun-
ty convention. More than 400 Legion.
naires are being prepared for.
The posts to be represented are Pom
ca City, Blackwell, Braman, Tonkawa,
Kaw City and Newldrk A vaudeville
program viii be given in addition to
addresses and music.
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1922-11-09
pilnt .lnmns TO Safety.

DANVILI.E. ILL Signalled from
the air by other aviators. Captain Law
renee II. Hickey, of Rantoul Field, was
saved from possibly fatal injuries Sat.
urday oven when he piloted his plane
down over the Wabash river and
jumped.
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1922-11-09
Cushine-Bristow Bus Line Started

CUSHING, Okla-A bus line be
tween this city and Bristow has been
started. cutting the time required for
travel between the two cities more than
thirty hours. intermediate stops are
made between the two terminals.
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1922-11-09
Expelled From Firm

NEW YORK.-Expulsion Of Samuel
Mast of the Chicago brokerage firm Of
Mast and company. from membership in
the New York Stock exchange, was
announced from the rostrum today.
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1922-11-09
Campaicn Started

AFTON.-Under the direction OF
Mrs. w. c. Scott, chairman, q member
ship compaign will be put on by the
Alton chapter of the Red Cross next
Sunday.
The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1922-11-09

The fastest recorded days trip by "a
sailing ship was l31 miles. made by the
Sovereign of the Seas on voyage from
Ncw York 90 san Francisco
The West Virginian. [volume] (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1914-1974, 1922-03-15
Plan Long Trips for
Varsity Tennis Squad

bNoRGANToWN, March Ia
Forced to call OF the proposed
eastern trip OF the tennis team be-
cause of the inability TO arrange
suitable schedule the West Vir-
gfnia University athletic officials
are making every possible effort to
outline an attractive card for their
racquet squad. AS announced sew.
eral weeks ago an Ohio trip is be
ing outlined and now comes the
news that a; movement is on foot to
send the squad on q post.season
tour of the state to meet the vari.
Gus West Virginia country club net
aggregations.
sssbecame known here today that
local authorities have been in com.
,municatlon with officers OF the
Wheeling Country Club for several
weeks in an cndeavor to schedule
d match. Letters have also been
sent to sthe country clubs at Fair.
mont, Clarksburg, Parkersburg,
Huntington and Charleston in or.
der that q series OF foar or five
matches may be arranged.
If scheduled the games will BE-
played after tho close OF school,
probably between the dates of June
40 and juno Is. This jaunt In ad.
dition to tho Ohio trip and, the in.
yasion OF western Pennsylvania
viii give the Mountaineer netmen
4 Yefy. attractive road" card, while
the home schedule also gives prom
ptse Of being up to the standard Of
past seasons.
Such a trip as Is now planned
was practically arranged last
spring, but a change in the exam.
nation schedule made 1t necessary
for Director Stansbury to call it
oil, thus causing tho season to end
rather abruptly. However, allow.
ances arc being made for such uu-
toreseen occurrences this year and
II suitable guarantees can be Sc.
cured the matches will undoubtedly
he scheduled. The Mountaineer
tennis candidates are now practic.
inR indoors and with number OF
new men showing up we'll the pros.
pects OF a successful season are
Terry good,
The West Virginian. [volume] (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1914-1974, 1922-03-15
1IgR QUINTEIS
! WII.L WITNESS
THIS CONTEST
Big State Championship
Games Start on
Thursday
an LARRY

West Virginia univcrsjt; tIid
West Virginia Wesleyan College
win battle on the Wesleyan COL
lege floor at Buckhannon this
eyening in a game TO decide the
state intercollegiate basketball
chanpionship.
Eais Will he the opening number
Of the state championship high
school series with teams en:ered
from all over the state. Whsle the
first game in this series Is not
bcokedsuntil tomorrow afternoon,
large number OF the participant.
ing teams will be on hand this
evening to SEQ the big college
game o. the year.
Several of the NIarloL County
teams VIII be present. fCr the game
tonight, while one or two CT them
iwill not leave here until tomorrow
morning, arriving In Buckh ZION
little before noon.
Among the Efayorltes at'tale tour
nament this'year vii be the speedy
Wheeling High School five, which
has not lost a game this season.
wheeling was jammed out OF the
state games last year by not get
ting entered on time, but the
Stogies will be on the Job with
plenty of fight this trip. Bristol
Hish School may also have to be
figured IN the running this year.
n Wheeling happened to be re-
turned winner in the series at
guckhannon, 1t would mean two
championships for that city, as the
Wheeling girls won the Spencer
tournament last week. making the
third time in succession they havs
captured the series.
This series this year promises 10
be a hotly contested one and
the games in Glass B will be Just
rs bitterly fought as those In Glass
ANf41sl
The West Virginian. [volume] (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1914-1974, 1922-03-15
GETS NEW AGENCY.

A. H. Reeves OF the Allied Motors
has also obtained the agency foT
the new Starr car which Is being
produced by the Pioneer motor cat
builder, W. G. Durant, and which
sells for $34S, In tho regular tour
ing car model. These cars are man
ufactured by Durant Mtors, Inc, fol
the Starr Motor Car Co. and produc
tion in quantity began on January
/ Of this year,
The West Virginian. [volume] (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1914-1974, 1922-03-15
SpatFlasIles
SouthernCaIrlps
REDS PLAY DALLAS

CINCINNATI, March IS
George Harper, recruit pitcher,
who developed pneumonia follow
ing an attack OF influenza, was
much improved, 1t was reported in
dispatches from the training camp
OF the Cincinnati National League
team at Mineral Wells, Tex.
He, probably will be able to
leave his bed by the last OF the
week.
The Dallas, Tex, league team
and the Reds were scheduled to
play an exhibition game at the
Cincinnailans ground this after
noon.
Beginning today a new sliding
pit, built Just beyond the third
base line will be an important
feature of the Reds daily prac-
tices. George Burns will coach
the recruits in the art of sliding,
The West Virginian. [volume] (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1914-1974, 1922-03-15
EXPLAINS. TlRE.sLlp WEAR

Should q thirty-four- inchtire,
out of alignment one inch, BIO run
8 400 miles It will cover $4,000
miles OF that distance by turning
over and over as It should, but It
will have been litrally dragged
sideways the remaining 100 miles,,
declared Lum Harr, Of the Tire
Service station this morning. "The
tire would be an exception, Indeed,
were It not worn out completely
by this 100 miles OF sheer drag.
cling undr the weight Of the car.
This is because mis-alignment OF a
cars wheels causes tires to side
slip, producing friction that rapid
ly wears out the sturdiest tires"
The West Virginian. [volume] (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1914-1974, 1922-03-15
Negro Woman Held
As State Witness

Mary Waldon, a negro woman
who was shot in the mouth by
George Perry, a negro, at a dance
staged about three weeks ago at
Ida May, was arrested last night
BY county officers and locked up in
the county jail. The woman Is
being held at the request OF the
prosecuting attorneys office as a
material witness for the state.
Rumors that she was planning to
leave this section and that she
was not going to prosecute the
case against Perry caused the ar
rest.