davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
New Britain herald., 1922-05-08
JESS BARNES HURLS
 A N0,H|T GAME
Giants Hurler Allows One Base on Balls, Spelling Perfect Record

New York, May s,-Jess Barnes, tionals, almost duplicated the perfect game pitched by Charles Robertson of the Chicago Americans just a week ago, when he pitched a hitless game yesterday against the Philadelphia team. The Giants winning, to 0.
 Only one base on balls marrod Barnes great performance, Williams being the recipient Of the pass at the start of the fifth inning. He was doubled mp when Fletcher hit into a double play. Only twenty-seven men faced Barnes as in Robertson's game of week ago,
 Four Hit to Outficld.
 Barnes pitching was so effective that few of the chances offered the New York felders were hard, though Bancroft and Rawlings cut off several hits by smart inield play. Only four balls were hit to the outtield.
 J. Smith, Philadelphia coach, asked for the ball with which Barnes had been pitching at the end of Phil adelphia's half of the seventh. He showed Umpire Hart where there were several cuts in the ball, and Hart threw it out.
 The Giants won the game in the early innings on the wildness and in effectiveness of Meadows. Kelly led the New York attack with two dou- bles and a single The score:
New Britain herald., 1922-05-08
JOHNSTON BEATS TILDEN

Berkley, May S.-Honors we"e even at the close of yesterdays play in the East vs. West tennis tournament each being credited with two wins. Yes terday Vincent Richards, representing the East, defeated Roland Roberts and William M. Johnston, of the West, won from William T. Tilden, 2d. The scores were :7-9, 6-1.
New Britain herald., 1922-05-08
Pittsburgh II, Chicago ,.

Chicago, May S.-Pittsburgh hit Alexander, Jones and Cheeves hard today and easily defeated Chicago, II to 5. The visitors were unable to score on Osborne. Carlson had three bad inning, but was given great sup port. Home runs by c. Rohwer and Grimes were features. The score:
 PITTSBIfRGH
New Britain herald., 1922-05-08
ATTEMPTING COMEBACK.

Sioux City, May S.-Harry Covel- eskie, who for a number of years was one of the leading pitchers of the De- troit Americans and who retired in 1918 will attempt to come back in the western league. The former big leaguer has been signed by the Ok lahoma City club and will join that team in Des Moines this week. Jack Holland owner of the club announce ed here today
New Britain herald., 1922-05-08
St. Louis 10, Cleveland z.

St. Louis defeated Cleveland here yesterday 10 to :. The Indians made sixteen hits against fourteen for the Browns. Joe Wood made three dou- bles and a single. Severeid and Ja- cobson each made triples with run ners on base. Kent Williams went hitless in three times at bat. The conf-e.
New Britain herald., 1922-05-08
MURPHY WINS AUTO RACE

Santa Rosa, Cal, May S.-Jimmy Murphy won the 100 mile Cotati speedway events in world record time yesterday, two minutes under the former mark, when he came home ahead of fast field in 52 minutes, 1o3 seconds, an average Of 114.93 miles per hour. Frank Elliott was sec- ond, Harry Hartz third.
New Britain herald., 1922-05-08
International League
FORMER BALL PLAYER DIES

Poughkeepsie, N. Y, May S.--Wi1- liam Daly, 5G, former well-known baseball pitcher. was found dead in his bed at his home here yesterday From 1886 until early in the nineties he was a member of the Boston National League club.
New Britain herald., 1922-05-08
'Batted for Leslie in 9th.
 1Batted for Henline in 9th. 1Batted for G. Smith in 9th,
'. SIIIItlI m JVI I'll
 NEM YORK

UdsS @V7F'3F Young 2; double plays Rawlings, Ban croft and Kelly; Fletcher, Parkinson and Leslie; left on bases, New York 1, Phila- delpha none; base on balls, off Meadows in 1 1-3 innings, off c. smith in 2-3 innings, hit by pitcher, by Meadows l, (Shinners), by G. smith 1, CBancroftl; los ing pitcher, Meadows; umpires, Hart, o'Day and Emslie; time, 1:37.
New Britain herald., 1922-05-08
S6 E ] WASHINGTON



 New York ................ O42 0lo 0l0-s Washington ............... 900 900 Ol0--1 Three base hits Devormer, Fewster Judge; stolen base. Pipp; sacrifice, Brewer: double plays. Bush, Harris and Judge Charity and Harris; left on bases New York [, Washington 3; base on balls of Phillips l, off Brillheart 4, off Jones l; struck out by Phillips 1. by Brillheart 9 by Jones 5; hits, off Phillips in 2 1-3 innings, off Brllheart in s 2-3 inninrs hit by pitcher by Brllheart tJones); wild pitch Brillheart losing pitcher. Phillips; umpires, Connolly and Wilson; time, 1:i3.
New Britain herald., 1922-05-08
fV I Y CLEVELAND
'Batted for Morton in 4th 1 R ttnl far Il 2 q hN In Sf h

TBatted Tor bag gby III 6th,
 St. Louis ................. 050 200 300-1o Cleveland ................ 002 002 O21-
 Two base hits McManus. Wam bsganss, Wood 3, Speaker, Gusto. Jameson; three base hits Severeid, Jacobson; sacrifices. EKolh ?, Speaker; double plays. Ellerbe, McManuS and Sisler; left on bases, St. Louis 1O Cleveland 10; base on balls, off Kolp 2 off Mails 3, off Bagby 9; hits, off kolp IS in 23 innings, off Vanglder. none in 1-3 innings, off Morton in o-3 innings off Bagby in innings, off Keefe in 1 inning; struck out. by Kolp 1, by vangilder l. by Morton ?; winning pitch CT Kop: losing pitcher Mails; rmpires, Hildebrand, Evans and Dineen time o09.
New Britain herald., 1922-05-08
NEW HAVEN HIGH SCHOOL.
2h Il q 2-

Two base hits. Grifen Beagle, Wade. Johnson; hits. off Gray in innings, off Williams in innings. off Purmont in '6 innings. off Cauffer in innings; bases on balls, off Gray in innings, off Will Hams 2 in 5 innings off Purmont 7 in 6 innings, off Cauffer in innings: um- pite, Shanley: time 2:l5; scorer, Rakowski.
New Britain herald., 1922-05-08
SAM JONES HOLDS
 SENATOR'S IN CHECK
Two Hits Is All Washington BatS-
 men Get OH His Delivery

Washington, May s.-Jones had Washineton's hatsmen completely curhcd yesterday and New York won easily. & to l. Until Judge triple in the eight, Jones had not allowed safe hit. The score:
New Britain herald., 1922-05-08
 
Baseball in Brief
NATIONAL LEAGUE.

Yesterdays Results. New York 6, Philadelphia 0. Boston 4, Brooklyn 8. Pittsburgh II, Chicago 5. St. Louis 8. Cincinnati 5.
New Britain herald., 1922-05-08
EASTERN LEAGUE
Results Yesterday

Albany 2, Hartford 1. Springfield 5, Waterbury 8.
 (12 innings.) New Haven 8, Fitchburg 2. Pittsfeld 2, Bridgeport 0.
New Britain herald., 1922-05-08
Standing of the Clubs
Games Today

Games Today Hartford at Albany. Fitchburg at New Haven. Pittsfeld at Springfield. Bridgeport at Waterbury.
New Britain herald., 1922-05-08
INTERNATIONAL LEAGUE

Results Yesterday Rochester IA, Jersey City 4. Syracuse 5, Baltimore 4. Reading II, Buffalo 4.
New Britain herald., 1922-05-08
Standing of the CIuhs
Games Today

Jersey City at Rochester. Newark at Toronto. Baltimore at Syracuse. Reading at Buffalo.
New Britain herald., 1922-05-08
Standing Of the Clubs,
Games Today.

Games Today. Chicago at New York. Cleveland at Philadelphia. St. Louis at Washington. Detroit at Boston.
New Britain herald., 1922-05-08
AMERICAN LEAGUE.

Yesterdays Results. New York 8, Washington 1. St. Louis 10, Cleveland '. Chicago 3, Detroit '.
New Britain herald., 1922-05-08
Chicago 9, Detroit I.

Detroit, May S.-Falk's home run in the ninth inning with Hooper on base, decided the Chicago Detroit game here yesterday, the White Sox winning, 3 to :. Alfred Kenning, 65-year-old fan, dropped dead while cheering Cobb in the seventh inning when the Tiger leader hit a home run with two men on, The score:
 CHICAGO
New Britain herald., 1922-05-08
CHICAGOa

Continued on Tenth Page).
New Britain herald., 1922-05-08
Standing of the Clubs.

Games Today Brooklyn at Pittsburgh.
New Britain herald., 1922-05-08
THICAGO

Continued on Tenth Page).
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1922-06-20

doing business as Duncan's Garage
146-152-159-164-4c.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1922-06-20

" - 49,
lie down because of
pains. One Sunday
my aunt was visiting
US and she said her
girls took Lydia E.
Pink hams Vege-
table Compound and
got well, so mother
said she guessed she
would let me tryit. 1t
is doing me good and
| praise it highly.
You are welcome to
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1922-06-20
AUCTION SALE

TO WHOM 1T MAY CONCERN:
Take notice that James NJ Dun
can, trading and doing business as
Duncan's Garage, having first given
the notice required by Section 1922,
Code of Virginia, 1919, will, for the
purpose of satisfying his warehouse
mans lien for storage, sell at pub
lie auction. for cash. at the south
east corner of Pitt and Cameron
Streets, Alexandria, Virginia, on
Saturday, the fifteenth day Of July.
1922. at twelve o'clock noon, the
following described personal prop
erty, which was stored under the
names of the persons given below:
One Cadillac truck stored in the
name of Harry Feeder,
One Dodge automobile, Factory
No. S1S6O. stored in the name Of
Monty Stone.
One Maxwell one ton truck, fac
tory No. 220, 966F, stored in the
name of Joseph Stepko.
If. for any reason, the said sale
be not commenced on the said 18th
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1922-06-20
Supreme Court Docket

Wytheville, Va, June 20, 1922
Proceedings in the Supreme Court
of Appeals of Virginia sitting at
Wvtheville yesterday were:
French ct al Us. STANCE Mining
Co.. ct ais. argued and submitted.
Sweery vs.. Patton, submitted on
briefs.
Virginian Railway Company VS..
Stoke. argued and submitted.
Writs of error and supersedeas
awarded in the following cases;
Pat Hill ct ais against Common.
wealth, from the Circuit Court OF
Wise County
Joseph D. Rosenberg against
Commonwealth from the Hastings
Court of City Of Richmond.
Witcher against Commonwealth
from the Circuit Court of Pittsylv-
ania County.
Price against the Commonwealth
from the Circuit Court of Pittsyl-
vania County.
Writ of error refused in case Of
Parrot against the City Of Roa-
noke
William B. Wright, Of Roanoke,
qualified to practice law in the
Supreme Court today.
r. W. Williams
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1922-06-20
WITH THE MAJORS
AMERICAN LEAGUE
Yesterdays RESULTS

Chicago. 2; Washington, O..
st. Louis. 3; Philadelphia, ,.
Cleveland. 4: New York, ,.
Detroit, IL; Boston, 3.
TODAN'S GAMES
Washington at Chicago.
Boston at Detroit.
Philadelphia at st. Louis.
New York at Cleveland.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1922-06-20
LIVE NEWS
Continued from page two)

The missionary society of Del
Ray NJ. f. Church held their regu-
lar monthly meeting last Thursday
afternoon in the home of Mrs John
R. Harding, president of the society,
After routine business Mrs. Clar-
ence S. Haley, delegate, gave a
most interesting report of the re-
cent convention in Salem. The local
branch completed arrangements for
lawn fete to be held on the church
lawn the evening of Thursday, June
2Sth, tickets for which are on sale
and may be obtained from any
member of the society.
By special invitation from Mrs
Harding, Miss Gretta Ludwig and
her Sunday School Class, the "Busy
Bees" of Trinity NJ. f. Church
Alexandria, accompanied by Mrs T
f. Ludwig, were received By Mrs
Harding in the Red Room of the
White House yesterday. at 1916
o'clock. The class presented Mrs.
Harding with a beautiful bunch of
American Beauty Roses, and great
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1922-06-20

The goodwill and reputation for
making dependable products
which this company has among
the great motoring public has
taken years TO build up and is to-
day lis greatest asset.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1922-06-20

day of July, 1922, or, if common
ced, be not concluded on that day,
the said sale viii be adjourned and
continued from day to day at the
same place and commencing at the
same hour, until the same shall be
concluded.
James N. Duncan. trading and
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1922-06-20

ly enjoyed their visit which lasted
about 20 minutes, after which, at
Mrs Harding's direction, they cal
led on the President who greeted
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1922-06-20
STANDING OF THE CLUBS

To find mares rest-To discover
something that seems Of Importance
only to find it isn't of consequence.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1922-06-20

Use this letter as a testimonial:
STELLA NEWTON, r. r. 5, Portland,
Mothers-You should carefully guard
your daughters health. Advise her Of
the danger which comes from standing
around with cold or wet feet, from lifting
heavy articles, or overworking. Donot
let her overstudy.
If she complains Of headache, pains in
back rlower limbs, or if you notice a
slowness OF thought, nervousness or IT.
ritability on the part Of your daughter,
give her careful attention.
Lydia L. Pinkham' Vegetable Com
pound is an excellent medicine for your
daughter to take, as it is especially
adopted torelieve just such symptoms.
Rememberit contains nothing that can
injure and can be taken in safety.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1922-06-20

Morganatic MISUNDERSTANDING of
a person of high rank to woman Of
inferior rank, who does not take her
husbands Citie.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1922-06-20
ToDAX'S GAMES
STANDING OF THE CLUBS
NATIONAL LEAGUE
Yesterdays RESULTS

st. Louis. 5; New York, 4.
Brooklyn. E; Pittsburgh, . GA innings).
Philadelphia. 5: Chicago. g.
Cincinnati Boston postponed, rain).
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1922-06-20
TODAY'S GAMES

Pittsburgh at Brooklyn.
81. Louis at NcW York.
Cincinnati at Boston
Chicago at Philadelphia.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1922-06-20
Girl. HAD
PAINFUL times
Mothcrs-Read This Letter
and Statement Which
Follows

Portland, Indiana.-'I was troubled
with irregularity and constipation and
Vashon Island news-record. [volume] (Vashon, Wash.) 1919-1954, 1922-07-21

Tourist; driving up in his
Cadillacl How far is it to Clcvc'
landR
Attendant; About one hundred
and ten miles,
Tourist: Give me twenty gal.
Ions of gas and half gallon OF
oil.
The next arrival is an autoist
in Il peerless"
Autoist; How far is it to Cleve.
.lond2
Attendant: About one hundred
and ten miles.
Autoist: Give me ten gallons OF
gas, and a half gallon of oil.
Then along comes a tivver
driven by Max Marsh, who m.
cramps himself, gets out, stretches
and enquiries, Glow far is it to
ClevelandY
Attendant: Oh, about one hun,
bred and ten miles.
Leisweist: Is that all? Gimme
two quarts of water and a bottle
Of 'three-in-one, and hold this
sm-of-a-gm till | get in.
Vashon Island news-record. [volume] (Vashon, Wash.) 1919-1954, 1922-07-21
Information Wanted

Where can man buy cap for
his knee,
Or a key for the lock of his
hair?
Can his eyes be called an academy
Because there are pupils there
In the crown of his head. what
gems are found?
Who travels the bridge of his
own nose?
Can he use when building the
roof Of his house,
The nails on the end of his toes
Can the crook of his elbow be
sent to jail?
If so, what did he do7
How does he sharpen his should,
er bladeSQ
I'll be hanged if I know, dc
you?
Can he sit in the shade of the
palm of his hand?
Or beat on the drum of his ear
Does the calf of his leg eat the
corn on his toes?
If so, why not grow corn on the
ear?
Vashon Island news-record. [volume] (Vashon, Wash.) 1919-1954, 1922-07-21

An editor was believer in
yellow" journalism and ran this
as a leading editorial; "Thc bust.
ness man of this town who is in
the habit Of hugging his stem.
ographer had better quit, or we
will publish his name. "
The next day thirty-seven bust
ness men called at the office, paid
up their subscriptions n year in
advance, left thirty-sevcn col
umns Of advertising to run mdef-
initely, and told the editor not
to pay any attention TO fool
stories,
Vashon Island news-record. [volume] (Vashon, Wash.) 1919-1954, 1922-07-21

AS many persons are aware,
most Of the older streets in Mon.
treal are named after Saints,
male and female. A progressive
Yankee has a typical American
drug store at the corner Of two
Of these streets and last summer
he put the following sign in his
window; Meet your girl here
for an ice cream soda. This is
whore st. Thomas meets Ste.
Gcncvieve."
Vashon Island news-record. [volume] (Vashon, Wash.) 1919-1954, 1922-07-21
Lieht and Dark Shades

A young colored couple were
sitting at the foot of the Statue
of Liberty. Henry was holding
Mandy's hand.
"Hemy," said Mandy, "does
you-all know why dey has such
small little lights on de Statute
O. LibertyP"
"Ah, dunno, replied the Ethio.
plan swain, "unless its because
de less light de mo- liberty -
California Pelican.
Vashon Island news-record. [volume] (Vashon, Wash.) 1919-1954, 1922-07-21
Almost Instructive

"I noticed you got up and
gave that lady your seat in the
street car the other day"
"Since childhood | have re-
spccted a woman with a strap in
her hand. "
Vashon Island news-record. [volume] (Vashon, Wash.) 1919-1954, 1922-07-21

Once a year the ncwsboys of a
certain district of London are
taken for an outing on the Thames
by a gentleman of the neighbor-
hood, when they can battle to
their hearts content.
AS one of the boys was getting
into the water a friend observed,
Il say, Bill, amt you dirty!"
Yes" replied Bill, 81 missed
the train last year"
Vashon Island news-record. [volume] (Vashon, Wash.) 1919-1954, 1922-07-21
The Man Who Wins

The man who wins is the average
man,
Not built on any particular plan,
Not blessed with any particular
luck,
Just steady and earnest, and full
of pluck
When asked a question he does
not guess
He answers the question, eyes"
or "No.
When set to task the rest can t
do,
He buckles down till he's put it
through.
Vashon Island news-record. [volume] (Vashon, Wash.) 1919-1954, 1922-07-21
Saving It For The Wake

An Irishman, lying on his death.
bed, was questioned by his incon-
solable prospective widow. "Pool
Mike" said she, is, there my.
thin we wud like to have that
wud make We feel better2'
"Plaze, Bridget" he replied
"0id like a taste of that ham Oi
smelt a boilin'."
eco 'on wild We. Divil a bit OF
that ham yell get, Ills for the
wake"
Vashon Island news-record. [volume] (Vashon, Wash.) 1919-1954, 1922-07-21
No Irish There

CTwo Jews in n street carr,
First jew vii nofcr go Ply
Far Rockaway AEGEAN fer de SUM
mcr. Nothing but Irish every.
where"
Second Jcw--"It's de same at
Saratoga, Abey, it's alive NIT
Irish. ! wish | could 90 we're dere
was no Irish. "
Mrs, Clancy Con the opposite
scat)-"Yez can both go to h--ll ;
yen find no Irish there"
Vashon Island news-record. [volume] (Vashon, Wash.) 1919-1954, 1922-07-21

The ceremony was over, both
had 81 willcd" aud the happy
couple were receiving the clergy.
mans blessing. First he said a
few cheerful words to the bride,
then he turned to the bridegroom
to give u few words of advice.
Now, my son. he said "you
have come to the .cnd Of your
troubles"
A few months passed and the
man met the clergyman again,
Overcoming his feelings, the man
managed to gulp out - thought
You told me at my wedding that |
had come to the end Of all my
troublcs2' The clergyman smiled,
"My friend" he beamed, 81 did
not tell you which end.
Vashon Island news-record. [volume] (Vashon, Wash.) 1919-1954, 1922-07-21
Some Things are not What They
Seem


Here are some choice lines
gathered by Everybody's Maya
lme from various publications
over the country.
Experienced on ladies
pockethooks an d handbags
steady work,
Wanted-Maid for general
homework in family of two
adults. Must know how TO coo.
For rent-In Townsend apart,
ments, a large, newly finished and
furnished room, with windows on
four sides.
Silk socks 49c. 1000 pairs pur-
chased for this sale. You never
saw such values They won't last
long.
Wanted by a widower, res
pcctable woman to nurse a little
girl at least 35 years old.
For sale-Assortcd lots of ladies
f numbers. we are disseminating.
practically all sizes represented.
Mostly blacks and values up to
II.
For rent-s,econd story front
Dom; semi-private bath; electric
light.
Wanted-Thirty or forty good
Young laying hens wanted. Must
ne reasonable.
Vashon Island news-record. [volume] (Vashon, Wash.) 1919-1954, 1922-07-21

why does the boss always
keep his desk locked?"
Important papers,"
"lle never locked up his papers
before prohibition came in. )"
Vashon Island news-record. [volume] (Vashon, Wash.) 1919-1954, 1922-07-21
U. S. A.-C. O. D.

When John left home for Eu-
rope, his father told him to send
a short wireless message if ever
he was in trouble. One day the
message duly came collect" and
this is what it said:
Dad:
SOS. s P.D.Q. R.S.V.P.-son.
Vashon Island news-record. [volume] (Vashon, Wash.) 1919-1954, 1922-07-21

Don't be afraid of your com
petitor. Learn from him. If he
is doing enough business to be
dangerous, he is worth studying.
The popular Storekeeper.
Vashon Island news-record. [volume] (Vashon, Wash.) 1919-1954, 1922-07-21

No girl is really in the spinster
class until she begins to get angry
when called one.
Vashon Island news-record. [volume] (Vashon, Wash.) 1919-1954, 1922-07-21
SENSE AND NONSENSE
Little Nonsense and Then Is Relhcd BY Best of Men"

Ford Is Willing to Run" says
headline. Yes, that's the best
thing about EN- Syracuse Her
aid.
Vashon Island news-record. [volume] (Vashon, Wash.) 1919-1954, 1922-07-21

Everything is divided equally.
The rich man has the twin six
and the poor man has the six
twins.
Vashon Island news-record. [volume] (Vashon, Wash.) 1919-1954, 1922-07-21

A man was brought into court
For the Illicit distilling of whis-
key.
"What is your name?" asked
The Judge.
Joshua replied the prisoner.
"Joshua?' repeated the judge.
All! are you the Joshua who
made the sun stand still?"
"No sir, Judge" was the ans
wer. 81 is the man who made
The moon shine. Star Liner.
Vashon Island news-record. [volume] (Vashon, Wash.) 1919-1954, 1922-07-21

"Don't raise racket" said
the thug as he held up the tennis
players.
Vashon Island news-record. [volume] (Vashon, Wash.) 1919-1954, 1922-07-21

You can't push yourself for
ward by patting yourself ON the
back.
Vashon Island news-record. [volume] (Vashon, Wash.) 1919-1954, 1922-07-21

Only a few years ago people
gazed in wonder at the first gas
light.
Now they gaze in wonder at
the last gas bill.
Vashon Island news-record. [volume] (Vashon, Wash.) 1919-1954, 1922-07-21
Missing

Has anyone seen Pete?
Pete whoP
Petroleum.
Kerosene him yesterday and he
iaSn't benzine since.
Vashon Island news-record. [volume] (Vashon, Wash.) 1919-1954, 1922-07-21

Summer friends fall of, like
leaves when the frosts of misfor-
tune come.
Vashon Island news-record. [volume] (Vashon, Wash.) 1919-1954, 1922-07-21

There is probably nothing quite
so bad as the actions of a man
who tries to be funny.
Vashon Island news-record. [volume] (Vashon, Wash.) 1919-1954, 1922-07-21

A modern definition of an OPP
timiSt is a man who carries, a
corkscrew.
Vashon Island news-record. [volume] (Vashon, Wash.) 1919-1954, 1922-07-21

Rey-"For why you go up
them stairs two at once?"
Izzy--"To save my shoes,
papa"
Ikey-"Fm sonny, but be
careful and don't split your
pants"
Vashon Island news-record. [volume] (Vashon, Wash.) 1919-1954, 1922-07-21
Which Country

Housewife-"Are these eggs
frcsh2"
Peddler (in an injured tone)-
Certainly, ma m; They're right
from the country"
Housewife-"lf they're any
thing like the last ones you sold
me, they must be from the old
country. "
Vashon Island news-record. [volume] (Vashon, Wash.) 1919-1954, 1922-07-21

Pep is not mere hurry and
hustle and Illustration.
Vashon Island news-record. [volume] (Vashon, Wash.) 1919-1954, 1922-07-21

The best way to be lucky is to
be plucky.
Vashon Island news-record. [volume] (Vashon, Wash.) 1919-1954, 1922-07-21
True Two WAYS

One way to get on your feet is
to sell your motor car.
Vashon Island news-record. [volume] (Vashon, Wash.) 1919-1954, 1922-07-21

II isn't the first kiss that counts
It's the upkeepl
Vashon Island news-record. [volume] (Vashon, Wash.) 1919-1954, 1922-07-21

Life is cafeteria. There are
no walters to bring success to
you. Help yourself, Here's Howe.