The Bridgeport times and evening farmer., 1922-04-01

And talked himself into a fit and
 copiuS was bled, But not a member in the room could one word he said. Then Lu. Segee. he asked the chair,
 if bleedin' was the thing; He said he guesses the club would
 bled with this ere building ring. But Fred Mccoy replied he thought
 he'd better stop his jug, And it he blowed that tune much
 more he'd bust him in the mug. sikes Patterson. he lifted up and said
 the human race Was usin' us as were just simply a
 disgrace.
 He wasnI any fghtin' man nor least
 wise was he weak, And he could punish any slouch that
 travelled on his cheek. Then Charley Shelton called the chair
 a dead beet and a galoot. When someone slung billiard ball
 and took him on the shoot: It caromed on Van Keuren and
 slapped Frank Wilson's ear And bent the Joking glass in two and
 bent the chandelier. Which Shelton tied handkerchief
 around his bloody nose And reached for paper weights and
 things, and got up on his toes And chucked them round regardless
 in somewhat general way. Till there was very little room where
 it was safe to stay. Then House got up and just remarked
 that he was sorry, very, When something sudden took him in s the lower maxillary, It might have been paper weight,
 that facvt I have not learned, But his remarks were very brief and
 hurriedly adjourned. Frank Fitch. the man as Knows , bank" got up to say a word, But sich was the proceedins that he
 could not well be heard; He dodged the things a little while
 and finally sot down, But not until a boxing glove had bust
 him on the crown. Then Walter Bacon, which he had,
 quite friendly, made a call, Got up and hailed the chairman and the members one and all; He said he was a stranger in a some
 what foreign land, But in the game before him he would
 like to take hand. Before the chairman could reply and grant him his request Some member hove a bod of coal
 which fetched him in the chest. Sich treatment of a visiter must con- fesS was odd, And then the man as hove the coal he
 banged him with the hod! But Bacon rig his dander up and
 didn't lose his grip, And there was music for a while to
 hear the coat-tails rip. Till Wallace took a billiard cue and
 poked him in the eye, When he wilted in a corner and al- lowed that he might die. And so they legislated, and each one had his say, Abusin' of his neighbor in a very friendly way, Until at length Sam Sanford demand
 ed that the chair Should put the question and decide the matter then and there. But Press he had the speakers chair and would not give 1t back. And Stevenson he rose and ripped till
 everything was black, He said that Press was rulin' wong, and everything would spoil, He wasn't usin' rules as were agree able to Hoyle! Just then. as Lyon was a quid was spottin' of a fly, He missed his mark and sudden took
 Jack HawIey in the eye; Jack threw a loaded spittoon back
 but Lyon ducked his head, And so the thing upSot and bust all
 over Press instead. Then Stevenson got up and got to
 stop such work as those, But Press struck wildly right and left and caught him on the nose, And then they clinched, quite cordial
 like, returnin' hit for hit. And pranced around amusin' in the
 blood and dirt and spit Then things began to get quite mixed, leastwise I cannot think Who first poured over Stevenson the bottle of blue ink, Nor who, when those two gentlemen was rollin' on the floor. Pushed Samuel Sanford over them with half & dozen more! About this time. unfortunate, the stove it was upset, And scattered coals and sich about till things were very hot And, accidental like, the gas was all at once put out, At which the members waded in and gouged and bit and fought. And after that the meetin' took q slight promiskus tone. And things was lively for a while as ever had been known; And might have been quite serious leastwise somewhat to some, When McNeil choaked a swallowin' a piece Of Watson'S thumb. He got quite black into his face, and throwin' back his head, Just wilted like, and all the boys thought certain he was dead.- And then there rig a tide of grief as threatened to OCT whelm. Till MT. Maxey fetched him to by shoutin', port yer helm!" He hove and sot and sot and hove, and then hove up the thumb, And after that he came about, for 1t refreshed him some, And then the members took their hands out of each others hair, And let gs~with their teeth when they was holdin' anywhere! At last, when things got quieted, it was a sight to Ace, The style of damage that was done, and likewise the degree,- Fred Nick had got a busted beak his beauty to enhance, Segee had lost his biggest ear and Waldo lost his pants. Frank Wilson could not find the piece