davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
New-York tribune., 1922-10-22

she may eschew aluminium in favor of q nra-
clous mahogany chest.
She knows bit about men, this girl. Hasn't
sne worked with them in 'the office" fer ages?
1ao dozens OF friends among them? Known
'hem as comrades? Rivals in business: Never
hoted as "a necker," she is fastidious enough
10 turn up her nose at the idea. She likes
men, has played about with them lot, she
VIII tell you, but that! No. thanks!
Inc Young Ineffectuals" may asvbelieve
lheres no sich animal. Let them mutter dis
parag1ng comments on dumb Doras' and the
IKE. u yearn here for some Of Mr.. John
Weavers picturesque slang, but it eludes me
ohe is quite as lightly contemptuous of "net-
ting" as they are of victorian" prudisbness
Poor old Vic-how often is her name taken in
vain! Si -
res. the New Bride, who is also The Girl
"itn-a-Job, sometimes feels n,onstrouslv old
When the clat-clatter of the Y. /. surround
her. Poor darlings, they think they've discov-
ereo new world, and Columbus did that
Ash De dashed hard On them, presently
"neil people stop talking about them and pull-
i.ie iong races over their witnesses and the
uen.i.s'ees they are so TREMENDOUSLY fearful the
"oiia viii not hear about. They'll be forgot
zen as were the bloomer- wearing, bicycle eirls
" she Sus. and the peek-a-boo blousa aro.
lies % slightly later era, and the dehutanta
siouchers. and the rest.
Meantime the Bride continues r. ba f.o,4
page material, SO to speak. If the ..ahon,ant
flapper can't make herself noticeable i, ,,r
other way, if she doesn't dance in mus;cal
comedy or write for the magazines 81, A. ILL.,
sraeions Tor the Sunday supplements, there is
always one way to get her name in print-to
oask, briefly, at least, in the limelight,
Mr. and Mrs. John Doe announce the mar
riage Off, i''ai
Yes, it Is awfully old-fashionedl
New-York tribune., 1922-10-22

all is said and done the wonder is that YOU can
actually buy cabbage in town for 10 cents.
Why, cabbage is a miracle. How sordid citv
people are. The farm certainly does change
your angle on things How it enriches YOU in
appreciation, even of humble thing as a
cabbage. And how philosophical you become.
wonderful experience when you become the
owner of cow! Words are Inadequate to
picture the thrills attending the arrival Of a
cow She is led through the barnyard gate by
plain man, her recent owner, and how huge
she looks, like some dear antedluvian. some
prehistoric creature, as she permits herself to
be conducted to her new home Such fun in
selecting name for her! As to owning a
continuous milk supply, when the most you
have ever known has been bottle on the
dumbwaiter or at the front door of YOUR
apartment-well, there are some things too
big to take in. But it's the way of the
farm; succession Of surprises-of miracles.
Never dull moment in the whole day: al
ways something different happening. Another
PLAIN man tells you that it is no more expense
to care for three cows than for one and he
urges two more cows upon you, kind of in
stallment plan purchase. You yield to the lure
OF the idea. The milknan will buy all the
milk and give you cash for it. Why, of course!
Easy and simple as pie. So YOU purchase
few large milkcans which cost no end of a lot
of money, but you don't care for now YOU are
IN the dairy business. The milkman buys YOUR
output of milk for four days, and then he tells
you he has lost some of his customers and
can't buy it any more.
what are you to do? The family holds
council, and the decision is that a bulletin on
butter making must be procured from the De-
partment of Agriculture, and butter must he
made scientifically. Always something happen
ing! The bulletin arrives; pans must be bought.
churn, all the paraphernalia; but now YOU are
surely In the dairy business; the directions
mention the bacteria in every line. and make
great point of temperature. Now there are
thrills and thrills, but positively there are no
sucn thrills anywhere as belong with newly
made butter; the whole family gathers around
the cnurn as you lift it out, lovely golden
prooucI, and everybody reads the directions
ABOUT the bacteria, and as each item tallies in
Cne demonstration, proved up and recognized
You begin to understand what life is for. It
Is to produce! Such thrills Then when
weekend guests arrive and you gather around
the table, how self-conscious YOU fee, as vo,,
pass the butter. Have some Of the bntterin
you urge as butter were unusual, adding
ihoaeseiy IN tones ringing with triumph. 81
made 1T myself Always something happen-
ing. Meantime the COWS pasture in the, Lot,
across the road and you take snapshots Of
Them, lovely pictures Of contentment: three
cows, all yours. You brush and groom them.
ana they know you and respond to the grand
New-York tribune., 1922-10-22

seemed; but some birds that done theii
studyin' straight without no booze on the sds
got so far ahead of him he seen It was hoIs
less to try to keep up with them, an so :
just peddled his telescope. ,
ut was a shame, he said, the way hopvu
took no interest in stars except the -
sharps. He said they all knew the names 3
three or four stars, though hardly any
EN- knew the same lot, an they all wantsss
see those they knew an didn't take nos
terest in learnin' about any more.
eff the stars they knew didn't happes :
be starrin' at the time O. night they napps1's,
TO meet up with the telescope they Wsaa.
their money back, so he got to polnsin s
glass at any old star an tellin' em tnas ~.
the one they was after. That way ne asss y,
got his 10 cents an the bird always sV0a.. :.
up to him, too, fer bein' able to PICK any 5. s
a fella might name right out OF sne.s,ss s.
off-hand an show it to him. They Was ,:a... sss.
used to see the Southern Cross from -
Square through his telescope. 4.
"He'd be pretty mournful about ~.
maybe as many as four or five hooksla s
then he'd begin to get scornful. his cus's'-
was lotta boneheads, he'd say, an Ms a. IS
fessors that was huntin' new stars = Z.
time wasn't no better. They could 'aa ass i,
well be maxim comfortable liv1n' aA.,l al
was, he said, if they had the brains sn.rs ,.,.
gumption to do it, instead of KILN tnelns,ss s
workin' a telescope with one hand ne So
addin' machine with the other fer she ss.sss
of a lotta numskulls that was just as pase.. s.r
at gettin' wrong steer an would pay 49,
for it besides. sd
"He was capitaiizin' little knowledes 1 e
say, an gettin as much out Of It as tas s,:s' 81
bugs in The observatories that just keps ps. .1.
up lotta worthless knowledge in their pss /,
The less man knew about astreno os
said, the more money be could make oas =
New-York tribune., 1922-10-22
Old Love and New Brides
BY MABEL McELLIOTT

"lfaE was when she had to have at
least three dozen monogrammed guest
H. towels, flock of lingerie and an i'm.
posing fleet of tablecoths. nank;ps
sheets and pillowcases, before she jared ~
take the fatal step, as it was popularity knowr
The new bride--and though she NAV mot ha-
ioilg TO the genus Flapper she is The-Girl-
witn-the-Joo-usually bothers with nothing of
Ihe sort. She Is far too busy working and
snatching enough time to dash up to her NET
shop to charge few trousseau frivolties to
know what an embroidery frame looks like
In fact, she might not recognize one If #
ioomed up out of her bottom drawer. And
when her Young Man comes to see her ;nste.d
of working away delicately at French lsnots
and cross stitchery, her sunny head hen+ n.
tently over her work (as the noyelists of tho
last decade liked to vision herl. while thay
argue fondly the relative values of side
porch and rose arbor, the New Lovers souab
bic hotly over old man Schopenhauer and spil,
some OF the kitchenette rabbit as they make up
It's not that young love is particularly diff
fcrent. Your determinedly indifferent, pseudo
cynical youth answers the trumpeting of ro-
nance much as his fathers did Your bobbed-
haired Girl With-a-Job is secretly as proud Of
her two-rooms-and- nd-kitchenette as her mother
was of shining cup stairs and down." She
buys her towels after the ceremony, that's all
And she never even wanted to own cedar
chest!
She may choose to live in the Village, three
flights up, over an Italian grocery, with plenty
of atmosphere and bit too much scent from
below. In that case there will be futuristic
draperies and bare floors and a black couch
with orange pillows. Or she may try the out
skirts of Gramercy Park, with no cooking
privileges, and go in for good" old things
picked up in the thousand antique
shops scattered along Madison Avenue; and
New-York tribune., 1922-10-22

IN McManon, the retired bartender,
Ia how people always want to be
pryin an inquirin' into things?
They've found lotta new stars now that's
so far away they couldn't nobody see 'em be-
fore, an they're as pleased an proud about
it as if they'd found new recipe for maxim
hooch
ITS f4ob'bly safer experimentin' with stars
than with new booze, but it don't seem no
more necessary. If fella was to travel as
fast as he could see, they fggered out, it
would take him about 10000 years an a few
odd months to get from here to the nearest
OF the new stars, an by that time they probly
would have prohibition there too.
ESQ far's they could estimate there was
more stars beyond them they seen, an as
nobody but an expert could begin to realize,
even if he had the ambition to try how far
these new stars is away, it seems like most
OF us would ha' been just as well off if they'd
said in the first place that there was stars
as far's anybody could see an then some.
but after while some bird with a new
telescope an new way Of figgerin' will find
out that there's some more stars that's bOO-
ooo light years away, an feel just as pleased
an proud about it as these fellas do
There was fella used to have q telescope
on Seventh Avenue that he rented out fer 10
cents look that had the right dope on the
stars. He used to come into the old place on
Tenth Avenue now an then when business
had been good an give me the low-down on
astronomy.
He was always pretty low in his mind
alter he'd had three or four snifters an,
would begin to tell how ignorant all the rest
OF the world was except him He'd gone an
studied up on stars fer years an years, Il
New-York tribune., 1922-10-22

bages are really cheap at $40 a piece when you
have raised them on your own farm. With
what cheer and hope you SOW your cabbage
seed in flats in February, placing the boxes in
the best, sunnest bay window where you can
watch the tender shoots come up out of the
earth. You have 1000 cabbages started in the
bay window and then you turn nurse You
learn what the word nursery means as diff
ferentiated from the human kind The dar-
ling, tender shoots respond to the sunshine
and to the care you give them, and finally it
New-York tribune., 1922-10-22
1T will cost

the farm agent proves most persuasive He
tells you of the wonderful chicken houses
on the farm, all ready for use He
tells you that with enough chickens
you can lie back and the chickens will SUD-
port YOU He talks about SQUADS and the
market for them. OF course, there are manv
subjects to be spoken of in an unknown
songue-the kind farmers use in speaking of
1arm matters-but any city man can under
stand eggs. There is scarcely a man on
New-York tribune., 1922-10-22

y" HE editor of "The Rural New Yorker"
has come to the aid of the city man
N who is at the mercy of the farm agent.
II have raised all kinds of things on
my FARM writes the editor, 'but have never
been guilty of selling farms to suckers" This
is how it is from the editor-farmers point
Of view:
"Some one asks us to name the most profit
able line of farming. Which crop gives the
best investment on capital? During the last
twenty years we have raised many crops.
They run from apples to zinnias. During
this period there have been years when we
made little money on all these crops, and
other years when we lost considerable. We
have never tried the sort of farming which
seems to pay best-that is, selling farms to
suckers. 1t seems to be easy if you know
how and possess a leather conscience You
get possession of an old farm for about 81, 900
Then you find some back-to- the-ander with
a childlike faith in agriculture He has
about $1,000 in cash, and you sell him the
farm special favor for $4,000. This
means $4,000 down and contract mortgage
for the balance. He thinks it will be as easy
as eating cherries to pay 81 900 year out
of his farm proceeds The first year he will
not make expenses; the second year he quits
in disgust. He has the experience and you
have $4,000 part of the interest and the entire
farm, and you proceed to sell this real estate
to another sucker on much the same terms!
This is no fairy tale, but the saddest kind
of fact, which is being worked out time after
time. There are cases where such farms have
been sold in this way half dozen times Of
course no back -to-the- LANDER has any business
to buy farm with little or no capital and
expect to pay off rs per cent of the purchase
price from the proceeds. Still, there are some
who seem willing to throw away their money
in that way, and so long as they are willing
to do it there are human hogs who will do
this dirty 'real-estate' business
l am back from the farm; but bring no
negative propaganda. Perhaps some time
some other time, somehow, somewhere, shall
again go back to the land, carrying all NV ex-
perience, for even to one who went bearing
aloft the torch of hope and returned holding
smudgy tallow dip, there is still the lure of
the country. the place where grass grows and
birds sing and flowers bloom and where there
Is skyline, a horizon, and always, always an
New-York tribune., 1922-10-22

Broadway to-day who would not halt h ,i...
to the fairy tale of egg production. bel;ev. \
and register VOW that he will one dav ~
out the idea to perfection To the usual =.
on Broadway the farm is the promised 4.
OF his moral existence. Seldom rnentioa;s
it lest he be misunderstood by the women !
home, there is tucked away with the uutT
filed longings of his life, the idea OF e.,
with chickens on it.
Chickens are really wonderful Thew ew.
stitute another miracle group. You resr.
that they constitute the worlds greatest i.
dustry, and any day you may read an itw
IN the newspapers telling how many hIGs
dozens America produces in a year. The faa
are overwhelming, and you vibrate 70 ss
terms of the responsibility for your msdes
part in it. The day when the chicken exrs.
calls was banner day. He explains clear
what is the matter with your chickens tt
are not "doing" as well as chickens should i
He exhibits the plans for scientific chic.r
house and convinces you that it is what "
require. 1t will cost money, but, then, uns
you employ InOueTH neJnOQS IN farming RI
says, you might better quit. No man ID
afford to be called names silently, and Vi
decide to become properly equipped. The aI
ject is to have fresh eggs in December. ID
US now change the pronoun from the seoal
person to the first and narrate with diEgI
ness exactly what happens.
The agent supplied the ideas and the pa
and we had an architectually inclined Mem
come up from the city on week ends and the
business men of the family took Saturday &c
and the chicken house began to be constructsd
Every week end was holiday time and part
for weeks and weeks. The scientific chicks
house was supplied with plumbing, heafn
and electric appliances, running founts'
palms, fancy chicken runs, avenues for hen
to stroll in, up stairs and down stairs, fas
feeding hoppers, illuminated perches, sEy
lights, balconies, nests for laying hens an
nests for setting hens. scheme for breakn
up the ideas of hens who wished to "setp ou
of season, yard to scratch in, tiled walls al
incubator attachment and brooder for th
New-York tribune., 1922-10-22

names you have given
them, guests Of honor
Of the farm. But the
day a calf is born!
Here at last is the BAN
ner thrill! A wonder
full little creature with
hoofs and with big, as
tonished eyes, an i'm
ported toy. arrived
from miracle headquar-
ters; Immediately he
owns you; you are un-
der a spell; he is your
responsibility, the fam
lily pet; but after a
while when he has
eaten S75 worth of
grain and you take in
ventory in the sordid
way of common NOR
tails, you accept an
other plain mans offer
for him. He brings you
SIS and as he leads the
plain man down the
road in all the vigor
Of his we'll nourished
youth you turn aside
to hide the tears and
you say something
quite different and
pessimistic about life.
It's the way of the
farm. Not all sun
shine.
Then there is the
chicken lure. It is with
the chicken legend that
New-York tribune., 1922-10-22

Continued on page seUen
New-York tribune., 1922-10-22
tenth Avenue Astronomy
BY ROBERT B. PECK

INT it strange" observed Marty
Mcmahon, the retired bartender,
show people always want to be
New-York tribune., 1922-10-22


Mother Nature dwells
all the year round, re-
ceiving her children
with loving approval.
This is to be the kind
of an article that will
pass by the editors
disapproval, for it is
the editor with the
longing for just what
the country will bring
to a weary man who
has stood in the way of
such truth being told
as "The Rural New
Workers." editor has
the courage to express
in a leading editorial.
I am back from the
farm. Oh, rare expe-
rience of finding your
morning paper on the
doorsill, a bottle of
milk at the front door
and the wonder of a
head of cabbage for
ten cents and lettuce
for seven cents, won
derful lima beans, all
shelled, offered for a
mere pittance! These
farm products are on
sale at the green
grocer's around the
corner, where city
housewives buy them,
taking them as a mat
ter of course, the
same as they do
plumbing and gas
stoves and theaters
and shopping. Cab
New-York tribune., 1922-10-22

THYME was when she had to have at
least three dozen monogrammed guest
H. towels, flock of lingerie and an i'm
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1922-08-23
BY FRANK G. MENKE


Every SO often a beaten fighter in
sists that his foeman used loaded
gloves"
And sometimes a winner does the
same thing.
Jim Jeffries whipped Bob FitZsim-
mons twice. But no one was able
then to convince Jeff fully that the
gloves of Fitz didn't contain "soma-
thing" other than hands upon both
occasions.
After their affair in San Francisco
which Jeff won, but only after Fit
had pounded and punched him to a
CORY spectacle, Jeff was quite sure
that his cornish foeman hit him with
something a bit harder and stoute1
than human bone and muscle.
Whether Fitz used something other
than his hands in those Jeffries fights
always will remain mystery. But
in later years a man who was con
nected with the Fitzsimmons outfit
for while, declared that the willy ole
warrior used to slip some plaster
paris between layers of bandages ant
| then, as he was about to put on his
CLOVIS, dip the bandaged hands in wa
| ter.
! 1.-THE result was that in few min
! utes the knuckles of Fitz were Gov
cred by solid layer of plaster paris
he explained. THAT gave him ;
i mighty weapon when he hit solidly
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1922-08-23
Tennis ENTRIES FOR
COUNTY TOURNAMENT
MUST Be IN SEPT. z

Wayne county tennis players desir-
ing to compete in the annual tennis
championship play which will be held
Labor day, Sept. 4, on the Earlham
college courts. should turn in their
entry to the Community Service Of
fees by Saturday evening, Sept. 2,
not later than o'clock. Joi
Events which will be contested this
year will be the mems doubles and
women's singles. The mems doubles
will be started at o'clock in the
morning and the women's singles in
the afternoon at $3.50 o'clock 1t is
the plan of the committee to complete
both Journeys in the one day
A mems singles tourney is expected
to be played early~irr September.
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1922-08-23
Leading Golfers Try
For Western Open Title
(Bv Associated Press

DETROIT, Mich, Aug. 23.-On a
course baked by continued drought
and with speedy greens, scores of the
leading golfers of the country got
away at Oakland Hills Country club
this morning in quest of the Western
open championship.
The twenty-second renewal Of the
event brought out field of about $50
entrants and the grind that, barring
ties, ends Friday night, will see new
title holder crowned, Walter Hagen,
now champion, not being in the list OF
contestants, on account Of exhibition
schedules.
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1922-08-23
DEMPSEY TO APPEAR
AT MICHIGAN CITY

MICHIGAN CITY, Ind. Aug. "a
BY permission of Governor McCray,
Jack Dempsey is to appear in Floyd
Fitzsimmons' arena here Labor day
against sparring partners, but not in
defense of his title. Four bouts other
than the Dempsey exhibition will be
on the card for the big show.
Jimmy Clabby, who holds the mid
die, light-heavy and heavyweight titles
of Australia, and Billy Wells, the
middleweight belt holder of Europe
will be among the foremost boxers on
the card.
The show will consist of:
Jack Dempsey vs.. sparring partners
Jimmy CIabby VS.. Jimmy Darcy, ter
rounds at $50 pounds.
Billy Wells VS.. Dennis OKeefe, tel
rounds at lat pounds.
Harold Smith VS.. Herbie Schaefer
eight rounds at rs pounds.
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1922-08-23
GIANTS PLAY FLASHY
BRAND OF BASEBALL;
DEFEAT REDLEGS "a

CINCINNATI, o., Aug. 23.-Pulling
through with three-run lead at the
end of the first inning of Tuesdays
opening game at Redland field, the
Giants succeeded in maintaining the
lead and won out to 3.
Hugh McQuillan, ex-Boston hurler
and rejuvenated into fast company.
took the mound for the Giants and
remained until the end of the game,
although he was wobbly at times and
was in bad in several innings.
John Couch started on the mound
for Moran's Redlegs and was expect
ing to add another victory to his al
ready long list, but the smuggling OF
the Giants was too much for him, and
he gave way to Cactus Keck, who
found the going good until Bancroft
hit fluke home run off his delivery.
The Cactus was taken out in the sixth
inning for pinch hitter, and Giles
pie took the mound. The Giants were
unable to do much with the latter
from then on until the end of the
game.
Groh Starts Rally
With one out in the first, Groh drove
sizzling liner past Fonseca. Frlsch
flied to Burns for the second out, but
it was the Giant luck to score on the
Reds after two men were down. Irish
Meusel singled to center. Young flied
to Duncan, but the Red left fielder
muffed the ball, Groh scoring. Kelly
crashed a single and the other two
runs crossed the plate.
Another inning of the same variety
came in the third. Young singled to
center Kelly field to Duncan and the
Pep took second after the catch.
Stengel singled and Snyder drove in
two runs with a double to left. Nc
Quillan singled, scoring the catcher.
Bancroft doubled to left, and Couch
was off the mound in favor of Keck
The Cactus then retired the side on
fly outs.
RedIess Score
Cincy scored one in the second on
Fonseca's single and Pinelli's triple
one more in the third on double by
Burns and single by Daubert. Roush
led off with a short fly to center IN
the sixth. StengeI tried for the catch
but missed the ball entirely, and Ed
die went on to third Fonseca was
retired, but Hargrave scored Roust
with a single to center. PinelH sin
gled and Harper, batting for Keck
worked McQuillan for a pass. Will
the bases filled Bressler pinch hit fol
Keck, but hit into double play.
The score: