The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1922-04-22

/ The following article concerning
i Personal Injury Reports" written by
F. Z. Smith, chief clerk in the Union
Pacific law department at Topeka.
for the last edition of the Union Pa
| ficic Magazine:
After twentY-nine years service in
the Union Pacific law department
for Kansas and Missouri 1 have ma
turaIly run up against some peculiar
propositions in personal injury cases,
and first I want TO pay respects to
physicians in general and railroad sur
geonS in particular for repo- ling in
| juries in an unadulterated foreign
language. Now lawyer has to know
| a good deal of Latin, but is not sup
posed to know the alleged technical
name of every bone and muscle in the
makeup of a "furiner'' who gets next
to the business end of a ow-catcher.
For instance. part of my work is to
brief personal injury cases-the re-
ports-in preparation of trial, and not
long ago I ran across this in the re-
port of a prominent surgeon. Among
other injuries the victim had:
"A slight superficial denudation of
the spideTmis on the anterior portion
of the fibia-'
Gosh! What an awful fix to be in!
But / boiled it down to four words:
He barked his shins-"
Words and Energy Wasted.
OF course the doctors statement was
perfectly plain and did not require
the use of a dictionary; in addition,
his version was much more dignffied
ana impressive than my interpreta-
tion-but, think of the waste of words
and energy-energy, If conserved, that
would move a switch engine from a
given point to chalk mark on the
ties. JET
Physicians followed the same prac-
tice on the witness stand, and the
judge and attorneys frequently try to
coax threaten them into talking
United States so the jury at least can
comprehend what is said
Many amusing statements are to be
found in personal injury reports-if
nan is not too busy to stop long
CROUCH on life's weary journey to dig
q smile or laugh out of them. I recall
examining some personal injury re-
ports not long ago which contained
the sad history of a man and his wife
who were perambulating over a side
walk not far from here, which side
walk is supposed to be maintained by
the Union Pacific in a safe and re-
liable condition. Eahe male end of
the party stepped on the loose end
Of board and it TIPPED up Just in
time for his better half to trip on it;
in other words the sidewalk fleW up
and hit her in the face
Ready for the Adjuster.
During negotiations for settlement
she stayed home and kept on a dress
ing gown with some kind OF a Wra p
per or bungalow apron over it. She
could never tell when the claim ad-
juster was liable to drop in, but when
ever any one appeared at the door
she threw off her wrapper and hoped
into bed and had her mother answer
the call at the door. This continued
for some days and finally (the reports
showed) a neighbor lady dropped in
and found the injured party lying in
the middle of the bed, kicking up her
heels. and making loud and unusual
noises with her mouth. Being asked
what was the matter she walled:
'Oh, T Just want to be forgiven for
my SINS
AS this claim was not brought into
court I never found out how it was
closed or whether her sins have been
forgiven.
In another case a man originally
from the Mediterranean region walked
into a station agents office and de-
manded damages, saying.
''The Union Pacific can't knock my
brains all out of my head and get
away with it,
Which shows the aptitude with
which foreigners pick up our slang
phrases.
Wanted $4,000 Damages.
A railway was recently sued for
SIS. 900 damages for chasing an alleged /
harvest hand (genus hobo) off a |