davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington times., 1922-09-11
By BILL PRICE.

THERE are more traffic and
parking regulations in the Dis
trict of Columbia than there
are stars in the Milky Way, in the
view of the average Washington
motorist, and the puzzling ar
ray over which motorists stumble
wherever they 60 seems about to be
increased by the ruling of one of
the judges of the police court that
it is an infringement of rules for a
car owner to park his jitney all
night in front of or near his home.
The other judge Of the court ap-
pears to take a different view and,
apparently, the question will have
to be tested in the higher courts.
The intimation is that the. police
will follow the decision Of the
Judge who holds that all-night
parking of cars, whether they are
properly lighted, Is in violation Of
existing regulations. Why not fol-
low the decision of the other judge
that It Is not violation of law2
Why, unless absolutely necessary,
add any more interpretations of the
parking regulations to the un-
wieldy accumulation that is already
a perfect nightmare to citizens who
are unfortunate enough to be the
owners Of automobiles
Abuses of all-night parking are
entirely probable, even certain, but
a sweeping regulation which would
prohibit all-night parking in front
of a citizens home, under certain
conditions, would be unfair and
unwise, especially if this parking
is done away from congested CEN
ters of the city.
There are thousands of Washing
ton people who live in suburban or
semi-suburban sections who do not
have access to garages and may be
unable, for various reasons, to i'm
mediately construct garages of
their own or to rent space in pri-
vate garages. One auto owner may
spend the night with another, who
has room in his garage for only
one car. There are so many con-
ditions under which it may be nec-
essary for a car to be parked all
The Washington times., 1922-09-11
Piling Up UnWelc0me
Parking Regulations

night in a street that to attempt
to enumerate them would be fu-
tile.
Therefore, common sense should
be, and no doubt will be, shown by
the police department on this ques-
tion of all-night parking. And,
heaven knows, sensible enforcement
Of traffic and other laws will be
welcome. Instead of adding more
regulations, the best thing that
could be done would be to simplify
and reduce the number now in
force.
Nobody will believe it proper
that the public streets should be
used month in and month out as a
garage, but it is a pretty safe bet
that the streets come near belonging
to the people, and that as far as
possible the public should be al
lowed the use of them to the fullest
extent, short of monopolizing them
or IN detriment to public interests.
We have on several occasions
pointed out, and seemingly the rec
concentrations we have made favor
ably impressed the police depart
ment, that the traffic police can
well afford to spend the bulk of
their time enforcing the really i'm
portant sections of traffic and park
ing laws, giving only such time to
the minor sections as is necessary
to keep them alive.
The chief aim of traffic laws is
to protect lives and property; to
make the streets safe to the travel
ing public. Every violation of law
which endangers life and limb
should be relentlessly followed by
the police and courts. There is an
enlarging field for the police de-
partment in this one particular.
There is waste of time and irri-
tating annoyance in giving undue
attention to minor violations, which
are nearly always the result of
thoughtlessness or ignorance.
There is plenty of deliberate, will
full violation of the really vital por-
tions Of the traffic laws to keep
the traffic police and the courts
busy every minute. And it should
be added that the traffic officers,
under the common sense reign of
the head of the police department,
are following just the lines we
point out. Thorough cooperation of
the courts in the imposition of
heavy fines and prison sentences
is eventually going to make Wash
ington the safest place in the
country.
The Washington times., 1922-09-11

RUT' again what impresses
us about Mrs. Crawford IS
the spiritual caliber and the in
tellectual ambition that prompt
ed her to make the pilgrimage
from Carolina to Columbia, at
an age when most pious folks
feel that they have lived their
allotted span.
And certainly they feel ,hey
have nothing more to learn!
There is no end to growth"
she said, when interview ID.
You see, she has the courage
even to say the perfectly obvi.
Gus, because she gives It new
and original meaning through
embodiment in her own life.
Just ask yourself whether
you at three-score-and-ten would
care to follow her example.
Indeed, now that you nre
"fessin" up, suppose you admit
how little of serious studying,
reading or thinking you have
had gumption to do since you
left school.
The Washington times., 1922-09-11

limit production, and unduly influence and
irritate employers. ,ax~aeae6Gk
Unreasonable shop rules have done
more to injure Labor and prevent it from
getting the good wages, good hours, and
good working conditions that it really
should have, than all the conspiracies
among employers that have ever existed or
even been alleged to exist.
Labor stands in it's own light when it
limits production, because production is the
creation of wealth. Wages and profit are
the division of wealth.
Wealth cannot be divided until it is Gre
ated. and it can only be divided in proper
ton to the amount created. The less wealth
there is created the less there will be to be
divided, not only in profits but in wages.
From statement given by William
Randolph Hearst to Cornelius Vanderbilt
Jr, for the CIV Syndicate.]
The Washington times., 1922-09-11

WELL spoken by this wise
w young woman Of seventy
one, who has been taking
courses in comparative litera-
ture and in the radical, conserve-
tive and reactionary tendencies
in present day morals.
All this to serve her as a basis
for well-ordered reading during
the winter months at home in
far-off North Carolina.
However, what here concerns
us most about Mrs. Crawford is
Herself as an example of that
second, or continuous, flower.
ing which Is one of the beauu-
full possibilities Of life for all of
us while breath holds out.
After graduating from a col.
lege for women and a year at
vassar. she was a teacher for
two years. Then she married
a Methodist minister. what
with being the mother Of six
children and her normal pre-
The Washington times., 1922-09-11

THE recent Republican primary selec-
i lions show strong progressive trend,
a trend even stronger than most pro-
gressives had hoped
Nevertheless, had always firmly be-
noved that tho reactionary trend of the
country after the war was entirely tempo
rary and due wholly to certain very proper
caution on the part of our sound thinking
people lest our country be drawn into the
extremes Of radicalism that were evident in
soue European countries
telt. however, that the progressive
trol1d Of politics would soon come about
again, for there must always be progress in
politics just as there Is progress in mechan-
les, economies, or any other field of human
endeavor.
remember In that reactionary period
sitting In my library that overlooks the
Hudson and talking with very despondent
The Washington times., 1922-09-11
Anchor for COU's Tail

Joint. Attached to this clasp Is
a short chain to which in turn
is fastened a taii.engaging
clamp or spring clasp which Ia
pinched on to the bushy part
Of the tail. This arrangement
permits Bossy to wag her tall
to a moderate degree-which
usually satisfies her-whereas
she is prevented from using II
in the face OF the milksr.
The Washington times., 1922-09-11

ITO prevent the playful COW
- from gently Tor otherwise)
switching the farmers face at
milking time. VIII r. johnson.
Of Harvard, Neb.. has invented
a convenient anchor for the
animals tail. II consists Of q
spring clamp that IL ciasped
around one Of the hind legs Of
the COW just above the knee
The Washington times., 1922-09-11

MY old man has lot OF ideas. He was
WI talking about gameness the other night.
HTAMENESS is a great thing" he said,
VI "but there amt much money in it.
The gamest man in Pueblo was a Teller
named Big George Christmas. He was as
game as a pebble, and maybe gamer.
ssTNHE Boo gang was laying for George,
l. and one night he walked single
handed into the Star saloon, where he knew
there was ten of them. He walked right
in shooting. Everybody said it was the
gamest thing they ever did see.
GT WAS in there at the time, but l run
out the back door when the shoot
ing started. People said l had cold feet,
and maybe / did. l know l felt nervous.
tT ALWAYS admired George for his
L gameness, and l was one Of his pail
bearers. Some folks said he was crazy
for taking such chance, but everybody
agreed he was game.
IS 4 MOTHER game Teller in Pueblo was
"A Henry Peavy, the gambler. Henry
would bet you higher than a cats back.
One night he bet everything he had in the
world on a poker hand and lost it. Every
body in town said at the time that Henry's
bet was the gamest thing they ever did see.
"T WAS in the game, but Henry bluffed
L me out without any trouble. l never
was very game with my money.
SuENRY'S been broke ever since, and
IL people point him out as the Teller
who made that bet. They say he must
have been crazy to do such thing.
$0TNHERE was a wonderful prize fighter
Il in Pueblo by the name of Battling
Smith. He didn't know much about fight
ing, but he was game. He never knew
when to quit. He would keep on tearing
in no matter how much the other fellow
was beating him up.
ST'VE seen thousands of people standing
on their chairs cheering for Battling
Smith, and telling each other how game he
was and | used to read lot in the papers
about his gameness, too.
GLE hasn't been fighting for several
IL years, and the last heard of him
he was still around Pueblo, and people
were saying he was crazy to take all those
beatings."
The Washington times., 1922-09-11
Haze You GumptiOn?
BY DR.. Charles Fleischer-

MRS. A. P. CRAWFORD. OF
AA Greensboro, N. c., was 4
student in this summers ses-
sions of Columbia University.
What Of that? Something of
that, you'll say. when you learn
that she Is a grandmother, sew
enty-one, and a Vassar student
of more than half a century ago,
when Vassar was only four
years old.
or course, she was Columbiu's s
oldest student. But one who
has the secret Of youth. IA.
vorite of the high gods who
keep their beloved ones alwPys
young.
There is no need to grow
old, mentally at least" says
Mrs. Crawford. "Stagnaticn
and intolerance are ones great
est foes in keeping young. These
changing times demand new
viewpoints, and the woman Of
today must keep herself well
informed as part of her duty as
a citizen"
The Washington times., 1922-09-11

The progressive political movement
throughout the country to-day is simply
the reaction from reaction.
tits the current of progress temporarily
stopped by postwar conditions and now
resurning its full flow, and resurning it with
such strength that at the end of certain
period there will be as much political prog
ress made as if the period of reaction had
never occurred.
The attitude of American Labor should
be, first, patriotically for what is the best
interest of the country; second, wisely for
what is it's own best interest
But it should always take the trouble to
learn what actually is for it's own best
interest.
think Labor should concentrate it's de-
mands more on good wages, reasonable
hours and proper working conditions, and
less upon shop rules which hamper business
The Washington times., 1922-09-11

lot of progressives who thought that reac-
ton had come to stay, that autocracy was
firmly established in America, and that de-
mocracy was headed for destruction.
looked out upon the Hudson and the
tide was coming in, forcing the waters of
the river back so that they seemed to be
flowing up towards its source.
I said to my progressive friends:
Look out at that great river. Some
times the water is flowing downwards
toward Its mouth sometimes it seems to be
flowing backwards toward the source But
at the end of every day, in spite of this varia-
ton, the full flow of water has progressed
and reached the sea-
so it Is with human affairs. Progress
always prevails. Sometimes circumstances
which correspond to the tides create a tenn
porary reaction. But at the end of given
period definite amount of progress will
have been made"
The Washington times., 1922-09-11
THE COAL
SITUATION
BY BUGS" BAER.

NEW YORK: Mrs. Jingle took
her lump Of coal down to
Tiffany's to have II matched.
WASHINGTON: sident
w Harding has bought him
self two oil stoves.
BOSTON: There is enough
coal here to last all Winter
IL our wood holds out.
BUFFALO,: Railroad detectives
- arrested five Erie passengers
who were trying to escape with
cinders in their eyes.
CINCINNATI: Breweries COM
~ plain that IL they can't get
coal they will have to close down
because of Eighteenth Amend
ment.
PITTSBURGH: There is no
= unusual coal shortage in
this town. Our dealers always
sold II eighteen hundred pounds
to each ton.
SEATTLE: Coal peddlers here
~ refuse to join strike. They
say they have never struck be.
fore and they will keep their
slate clean.
pHILADELPHIA: Soft coal is
hard. To get. Hard coal is
soft. For profiteers.
CLEVELAND: Flappers ex-
pect to keep warm by using
coal dust for complexion powder.
oLEDO: When somebody
sang Turn Back the Uni.
verse and Give Me Yesterday"
he didn't know yesterday was
going to be Heatless Monday.
nETROIT: Owing to coal panic,
~ Ford closed down his flivver
plant and threw two million re-
pair men out Of work.
A LBANY: Last winters ashes
"A are fashionable again.
DENVER: Remember story OF
poor little match girl who
froze stiffer than an iron bridge
on Christmas Eve? She tried
to warm her fingers on matches
and got universal chilhlains.
Well, that poor little match girl
is now paying income taxes in
Heaven. We wish we were there
ourselves.
TEXAS: Koal Koal Klan amt
- riding anybody out of town
on fence rails nowadays, because
victim burns rail and invites his
friends to fire.
KENNEBUNKPoRT: Wireless
IA from London states that
Conan Doyle claims to have been
in communication with a lump of
coal. We're going to freeze up
here because we ain't superstitl.
Gus.
The Washington times., 1922-09-11
HOW many original thoughts
do you have in q yea-?

do you have in a yea-?
Not that you couldn't have
them. but you just do not use
the necessary energy Of mind to
face life with an insistent in.
terrogation mark.
And suppose you were fifty.
Would you dare to pull yourself
up by the roots from where you
had lived most Of your ,du;t
years and ruthlessly transplant
yourself to some other town?
Such re.potting Is good for
the human plant, and is sure to
produce, as reward for red.
blooded courage. that further
Towering which is proof Of tho
eternity Of our spirit.
Copyright. 1929, by King Features
Syndicate, Inc.
The Washington times., 1922-09-11
WORTH HAVING.

II don't care to 20 to that
play" she said. ''The papers
say II isn't fit to be seen"
by George" he exclaimed:
You're not turning II down, are
your"
Certainly not"
Excuse me. Could get you
70 become my wife1'
The Washington times., 1922-09-11
Permitted to Live.

Partisan "dandies" are shaving off their
eyebrows, and wearing bejeweled anklets. The
fact that they are permitted to appear in
public leads naturally to the conclusion that
bludgeons must be scarce in Paris.
At the time OF the signing Of the Declara-
ton OF Independence, II Is estimated that
one-third Of the merchant ships flying the
British nag were constructed in America
The Washington times., 1922-09-11

OWING to the death of Mrs.
X. c. Beaton, the daily
contribution of TX. c. B." to
these columns is suspended
for a few days.
The Washington times., 1922-09-11

occupation with parish work she
has been busy enough.
She believes she kept herself
young by striving always to be
intellectually awake and safc-
guarding her health with Judi.
cious exercises and a few simple
rules of hygiene.
The Washington times., 1922-09-11
M Y OLD NJ AN
AVA Copyright. 1922. by Star Company
BY DAMON RUNYON

MY old man has lot of ideas. He was
Nl talking about gameness the other night.
The Washington times., 1922-09-11

KENNEBUNKPoRT: Wireless
~ from London states that
Conan Doyle claims to have been
in communication with a lump Of
coal. We're going to freeze up
here because we ain't superstitl.
Oila
The Washington times., 1922-09-11

90 CAMENESS is a great thing" he said,
VI "but there amt much money in it.
The gamest man in Pueblo was Teller
named Big George Christmas. He was as
game as a pebble, and maybe gamer.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1922-02-12
Emperor Wilhelm
 Was Thrifty, His
 BiogrGpher Says
spec,al CnbIe to me Age-HeraId.

Special CnbIe to The Age-HerAld.
 Paris. February 11.-New facts are coming to light which demon strate that the deposed Teutonic monarchs were not such bad fellows after all
 The Kaiser, for instance. who has been 20 much abhorred by right thinking people until now, has his merits, People say he was wont to murder and torpedo ships, but against these weaknesses a recent btographer sets the virtue of thrift. Thrift Atones for many faults.
 It appears that Wilhelm was so thrifty when he used to live in Pots dam, that sometimes he would save as much as s250 900 q year Lest the reader suppose that he accom- plished this by denying himself food or cutting down on his wifes wardrobe, 1t fs explained that even during the war the Kaiser always in- sisted on having the best of victuals on his table, and his wife enioyed every luxury her heart desired. There was nothing mean about William. He accomplished a large part of his savings, 1t Is said. by reducing the pensions of retired palace servants to three or four marks a month. The enormous pension roll previously paid to the aged. decrepit and totally use less ex-servants was quite a/ need less expense.
 Future generations of schoool chil- dreu may learn many awful lessons about him to take care of their ene- mics by studying the life of Wilhelm II of Prussia
The Birmingham age-herald., 1922-02-12
France 10 Decide Bet,Ueen Large Standing Army or
 Good WiH Of Entire World
M0NTEVALLO COLLEGE

Montevallo. February 11.-(Spe- cial.)-Interest in the pottery exhibit at Alabama Technical Institute and College for Women is proven by the fact that out of the 50 pieces ex- hibited, IT have been bought by students, faculty members, and townspeople. The exhibit comes from the following potteries; Fulper, Elem ington, New Jersey; Paul Revere, Boston; Sophie Newcomb college, New Orleans; Redwood. Cincinnati, O. Van Briggle, Colorado Springs, Colo. {; Durant Art Galleries, New York Bowl Shop, Brighton, Mass; Dedham, Dedham. Mass; Southern Mountain, Jugtown, N. C.; Niloak, Benton. Ark. i; and specimens of American Indian Pottery found in New Mexico.
 Some pieces of local interest have been shown in connection with the exhibit. They arc fragments of American Indian pottery, unearthed d in Florida by W. Nj. Jones' Williams, college electrician, and pieces made in the college art department, show ing the use of Alabama clays
 Miss Mary E. MacMillan, head of the art department, takes special in- terest in pointing out the possibilities for pottery making furnished by the variety of colored clays in this state.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1922-02-12
New System! of
 Fat Reduction

Here's A new way for all fat people to laugh together at that old bugaboo- Obesity. The saying that "there is noth- ing new under the sun" does not now ap ply to fat people any more. Here Is something new for them-A new senna- tion . new pleasure. new and graceful figure, easily found by anyone who is passing beyond the limits of slimness. Everyone has heard of the Marmols Pre- scription; that harmless combination of fat-defyinK elements perfected by one of the foremost physicians. Now, from the same high authority. there comes another idea-the idea of eondensing these same pure, harmless ingredients into a pleasant little tablet. Taken sfter eating and at bedtime they help the stomach to dis pose of all the fatty foods, converting them into compact. solid flesh. muscle and energy, without dieting or exercise Marmola Prescription Tablets regulate entire system-do for you what bodily exertion and self-denial can not do, and the fat, once routed. is gone for good You can prove all this, at Q trifling cost. Marmola Prescription Tablets sold by all druggists or sent postpaid by the Mar mola Company, 4612 Woodward Avenue Detroit, Mich. A cse-sufficient to bring results-is but one dollar.-Adv.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1922-02-12

Think of an apartme ent house where children are welcome! The thousands of home seekers who have become exhausted mentally and physically in searching for an abode in which to house their children, will rise up and call the man who conceived this idea blessed.
 the Roskind Optical company. Nash vile, Tenn. who will erect the 'Margaretta Apartments" that city, where children will be welcome furthermore, the possession of at least one child is an absolute requis- ite for securing lease of an apart ment therein.
 Then think of this: Every family which Is visited by the stork during their tenancy receives the rental of their apartment for one month free , the month during which the event occursi
 The unfortunates who have been forced to grovel in supplicatin,g en- treaty before some of the child hat ing apartment house owners should city pause and consider pr. Roskfnd's Innovation; those who have time with out number scanned the for rent" columns in search of a house, only to find at the end of the description VI tho AOQSG oT that couples with children need not ap- ply" Many of these apartment house magnates who bar children will welcome as many dogs or cats as the apartments will hold-but never little childl
 Dr. Roskind has experien enced this peculiarity of the landlord, as his comment here given indicates. He says:
 When I sold my house recently I made application for an apartment from one of the leading real estate agents of this city, and rented same. When 1t came to signing the lease, the agent asked me if had any chill dren, and which I told him I had a little daughter, he very abruptly in- formed me that he would not con- sider me as a tenant. A canvass of other agencies proved likewise that children were denied homes-not wanted-thus putting a premium on race suicideI'
 When in my home that evening with my little Margaretta on my knee, I reviewed the experience of the day and determined that I would erect an apartment house, give it. to her. and tell her to fill 1t with play mates. I would absolutely refuse to rent any part of 1t to anyone who did not have at least one child, and in addition I would give one month rent ire to the parents ofa ny little one born in the apartments
 T secured for the erection of this building a we'll shaded lot on Bel mont boulevard near the ward-Bel- mont school and adjacent to the George Peabody college with it's great kindergarten and it's demostra- tion school.
 Tt Is to be three-story building of brick, containing six six-room apartments. The blueprints specify that every room shall receive sun shine and air enough to make the small tenants for whom it Is being constructed. as healthy and comfort
The Birmingham age-herald., 1922-02-12
By I. b. MARS

able as they could possibly be in the most spacious country home. There are broad windows in every room. an open court, which indents the rear of the building, making this possible. T had been informed by agents that children's destructive tendencies made them undesirable tenants and I therefore set about to obviate this objection in my own building. The walls of the Margaretta are to be finished with s specially prepared plaster which Is very durable and practically impervious to the kicks of the most irrepressible small boy. The floors. and woodwork, too, with out sacrificing beauty of finish, will be fortified against the wheels of the chu-chN trains and the im- prints of little hands.
 In the court is to be a wading pool, that will give the summers the ad- vantages of the seashore or camp. Back of the building is the play ground, where will be found many amusement devices. Slides and swings, sand piles and see-saws ga-