Evening star., 1922-07-02

iangour that came over nm OF
a Sunday afternoon when he wished
for enough energy to go and play
golf but actively bored SO that every
action Of his life as far as he could
see was ugly and lusteriess. And
yet he loved his wife and his two
good little girls. Mary was pretty,
good. devoted, and-though his mind
hesitated a little over the last step
intelligent. Her mind was as alert
and vigorous and quick to under
stand his thoughts as 1t had been
when, the autumn after he left col
lege, he had married her.
1t was matrimony, he told himself,
not Mary. that bored him; but he was
aware that the line was fine one.
Nevertheless he had been careful to
draw it when. the evening before.
Sam Francis and he had been dis
cussing the advantages and disad-
-vantages OF the married state. Sam
was a bachelor. He had come over
to dine. and after dinner the two
friends had gone to moving pic urr.
Mary was busy putting the children
10 bed. The picture. as it happened.
dealt with the life of young mar
ried couple: and though all the walls
were Of rough plaster. all the door
gays were arches. and all the trees
euca;yptus. breakfasts and babies
and bills seemed to be much the same
on one coast as on the other.
IT'S dull picture" said Sam. the
bachelor. lightly.
'It's a dull subject" said Eliot the
married man, bitterly.
THIS opened the door to a discus
sion none the less frank and
intimate because it was carried on in
Eeneralities. Eliot began by quoting
that terrible sentence from Middle
march: IT never loved any one well
enough to put my head into a moose
for them'-"it is a moose. you know.
Sam agreed, but wondered whether
every man as he grew older (Sam
as twenty-six) did not want a home
of his own, and at this point an
irresistible desire for self expression
came over Eliot. He remembered
how he had once been free-free not
for evil things but for adventures
that were often nothing more than
inteIlectual-free to miss a dozen
suburban trains, II he wanted to
finish a book at the club-free to go
to the theater without asking him
self whether the money would not
have been better spent on the chill
dren's shoes-free to wander all
some futile paradoxical philosophy.
without owing any one an explana
tion OF his irregular hours-free even
to give up his job, II it became in
tolerable to him-free to hazard his
future in any way he felt inclined.
This was the aspect of matrimony
that no one explained to you. You
or your favorite cigar. and perhaps a
good tailor. but no one made it clear
that your privacy and your leisure
and your liberty to choose must go,
too.
And to some people" Eliot said
judiciaily. as if he had nothing in
common with people like that--"to ,
some people life becomes an intoler-
able bore when those things go. or
course that does not apply to us, !
because Mary is an exceptional
woman
"Oh, very" said Sam smiling TO
himself in the darkness OF the theater ,
over the fact that any one could call ,,
Mary exceptional.
Be- The conversation made little i'm
preston on him, but in Eliot's mind
1t created clear mental picture of
his situation that he could not forget ,
Never, 1t seemed to him the next
morning at breakfast. had his two
daughters asked why and when SO
often. Mary. neat and pretty at the
head OF the table. smiled and poured
out coffee. She generally answered
the children with patience that
seemed to Eliot miraculous but mis-
placed. She thought that the young
minds were stirred by intellectual
curiosity. But Eliot could never un-
Qerstand why. il this were true, the
children never listened to the an
}wers. "They listen to mine, dear"
Mary would reply, because I really
try to explain to them. You only try
TO put them In the wrong for ask
ing" ''Oh, ] don't question. my dear.
that you are better worth listening
to than I am" Eliot would say, |
'.oniy-'
That was the pattern conversation
they usually had upon the subject.
but this morning Mary did not an
sver every why and when-she
seemed not to answer any one i'm
mediately-not even Eliot himself.
though 1t was only afterward that
he remembered her silence.
WHEN he came home that after
:" noon a note from Mary was
lying on the hall table,. not un-
usual occurrnce. She had probably
gone to the garden club. She was
punctilious about letting him know
Ser plans. 1t was the afternoon of
sse children's dancing class. The
touse was deserted. Eliot's spirits
rose. He would actually sit down in
Ais own sitting room and read, or
thrnk, or do neither, without any one
saying, what have you been doing
all day, dear" or "Did you remember
the butter" or why must l. father?"
: He did It., He clasped his hands
behind his, head and looked at the
ceiling. The little country neighbor
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