Albuquerque morning journal. [volume] (Albuquerque, N.M.) 1903-1926, 1921-12-05
Crabbscrawlings
HOW COME?

HOW COME?
The days you're feeling poly
And you do not shave your mush,
You have a flock of company
And you're flustered til you
blush!
But the days you're feeling peartly
And you scrape your homely phiz,
Not a darn soul comes to see YOU
Now wonder why that is!
Wanting a divorce is all that will
make some women admit they ever
made a mistake.
Most of these mo Beer No
Work" fellows seem to be succeed
ing at both.
Married women are fond Of dogs
because they are responsive.
Married men like them because
they can't talk back.
II used to be that when girls
reached a certain age, they put on
long skirts.
All men may be born free ana
equal. but there it ends.
There may be more dejecteu
looking persons in the world t.iai
an old bachelor on Christmas oay'
but they are not advertised as eA-
tensively.
When hubby begins to bring ths
newspaper to the breakfast table,
wifey can give up worrying about
| her boudoir cap being little soiled.
Liberty bonds in Reno remain at
par.
An unbreakable vase would put
"Bringing Up Father entirely OUT
Of business.
We wish somebody would invent
an unbreakable vase,
Enthusiasm is great thing, but
the boys who bring home the oa-
con don't 60 hunting with prass
band.
Good management and hard work
are the Siamese twins of success
II black is becoming to them,
widows are relieved OF a lot OF the
sorrow.
A bachelor is known by the
apartment he keeps.
A benedict Is known by tne nech-
ties he wears.
The biggest fool thing we have
heard of recently is French heel
nine inches high.
II Is almost time for mother to
decide whether she will give father
a new set of teaspoons or a pair OF
satin pumps for Christmas.
If those Santa Fe and Las Vegas
bootleggers were selling gooo
whisky emphasis on good) at $3
and 81 per pint, they deserved ar
rest.
Dogs are lot like people. The
ones WIN Ln6 Siildlieol Hciuo 6SA
orally make the most noise.
Tobey Toadvine's apartment In
the highlands has been temporarily
rented to Mr.. Otto Fishface, a re-
cent arrival in our mist, as we say
in California.
Having no regular trade, Mr..
Fishface will no doubt take a flyer
at selling real estate here, while IN
! his spare moments he will attempt
to work up a literary career, an
other falling peculiar to health
seekers.
Both the Barelas board of trade
and the Old Town optomlsts have
made Mr.. Eishface very flattering
offers to locate in their respective
municipalities, but the newcomer.
naturally of a leisurely disposition,
has fallen admirably into the spirit
of manana, and a decision may not
be reached for years, or perhaps
not even until the Barelas bridge
is repaired.
It is refreshing to know that
something in Albuquerque is going
/ to be started and finished according
to schedule.
The Y. M. c. A. drive for 200
members will stop in zoo minutes,
win, lose or draw, regardless.
II Albuquerque had as many
paved streets as it has drives" 1t
should be annoyed about the cost Of
asphalt, what?
THE DREAM RIVER.
The Lickin' is a river
That keeps flown thru my
dreams,
And the murmum Of It's rifles
Keeps a-callin' me, 1t seems,
To the dam where l went fishin'
And the millpont where ! swum,
And 1t keeps a-callin' plainly,
Tho 1t knows | cannot come.
For the Lickin' that Is flown
Thru my mind this autumn day,
Is the river of my boyhood,
And it's flowed on far away
Where 1t emptied into manhood
When the flush Of youth was on,
But can't go back to see 1t
For too many years have gone.
I have looked the country over
! For another stream like that,
But 1t seems that God don't make
'em
ANY place 'cept where that's at.
And would go back to find 1t,