Perth Amboy evening news., 1921-10-05
R~UBBERNECK
By Frederic j.. Haskin.

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wagon, which a few years ago was confined to
cities with unique sightseeing features, is now,
without exaggeration, ubiquitous.
Practically every town of any size or distin-
gushing features is equipped with at least one
line of buses to show strangers its millionaire
row, city hall. and normal school.
The rubberneck wagon Is typically an insti-
tuition of the day. Imagine, II you can, any one
OF your Victorian ancestors with his ideas OF
dignity and reserve, climbing up on the seat by
the driver and rubbering with animation while
a megaphoned individual shouted facts and
Jokes in his ears. This is what travellers want
nowadays. If there was any doubt OF TINS, a
glance at the neatly packed buses rolling over
the streets of any big city would prove it.
Here in Montreal, an unusual situation pre-
walls. The quaint OLD cabs and victorlas nave
stood out against the invasion of the big, ef-
hcient- looking buses with their megaphone
spielers. But it is no use. The buses are here
and the cabs will go eventually, though a few
people do still prefer their atmosphere
The reason why the cabs have been able to
hold out against the autos is Mount Royal. This
mountain that rises back of Montreal is a pleas
ure park belonging to the city. 1t is a favorlte
drive, or climb, with residents of the city. ana
strangers never miss driving to the top to enjoy
the broad view of Montreal below and the st.
Lawrence winding beyond.
They drive up because the city permits no au-
tomobiles to climb Mount Royals winding roads.
At different times, sentiment has been aroused
in favor of removing the restriction on automo-
biles. But the constantly curving roads are re-
sarded as too dangerous for swiftly moving We
hicles, especially il the drivers should be mex
perienced, intoxicated, or reckless. So the cab
Dies are IN InelT GltIltllI HtEtY dHu w q fNANNS
busting business up the mountain.
Montreal further varies the monotony OF the
usual assortment of green, red, blue and whlte
buses, by having its own sightseeing street car:
This car is gaily decorated in gold paint and
electric light, so that it resembles the chariot on
the merry-go-round. 1t goes round the base Oh
Mount Royal and offers an hour ride Tor 20
cents. But elsewhere in the city, and IN other
cities, the sightseeing automobile is what might
be called the tourists delight.
The interesting thing about the buses is the
people who do the spelling. Generally they know
their harangue by heart and deliver IT IN stem
torian tones with about as much expression as a
boy reading the newspaper editorials to his
grandfather.
Bus Jokes.
The buses hold to one belief, and that is that
the tourist likes Jokes. When the megaphone
man is about to spring a good joke on a building,
he goes through the same sort of stunts That a
circus star does to preface his chief stunt. In
the circus, the music stops, the star stands still
and claps his hands, and waits. The audience
holds it's breath and is all attention.
Well, the bus cicerone hands out a Few c1iu
facts. and then pauses. He is still wearing his
megaphone. and the bus waits anxiously Tor the
next pearls of wisdom. By the time the atmos-
phere is sufficiently tense, the strategic point
has been reached. The megaphone man dra-
matically shoots out his right arm and says, ON
your left, ladies and gentlemen, the steal WORKS
sometimes referred to as the CITY Han. oh
The crowd relaxes and giggles. And the lady
on the third row repeats the joke wrong Tor the
deaf lady back of her.
Apparently there is no end to the jesting
possibilities about a city. 1t is a new game
You look at a building and wait Tor the mega
phone operator to point out the hidden humor.
Or, maybe you try to spring one yourself, mop
ing to achieve fame by having 1t incorporated
into a story told five times a day, 10 thousahuS
of people a year.
An insane asylum would obviously inspire any
guide to point it out and add soothingly, we
inspires the pun: These ground are so beautiful
that people are dying to go there"
A stock joke in Washington is sprung al
Co. r:-I NIL ND oil his InVPTnmenI
Row. He points out the statue of General
Winfield Scott, representing the war Depart
ment. Daniel Webster is on the left, represent,
ing the State Department. And Hahnemann,.
he concludes with a sweeping gesture, .on-the
right, representing the Interior Department.
For the benefit of those who are not up on
medical history, the barker then explains that
Hahnemann was a doctor and repeats his joke
to be sure everybody gets II.
Sometimes the megaphone man takes What
might be called a mean advantage to josh the
bus driver who obviously can't shout a retort'
though he may reply under ms preath. tail
Ahead of you on your left, the city jail
where the driver learned his trade" burbles
the guide joyously with a wink at the driver.
Dollar Hotel. The driver eats lunch here every
day-on the curb" u,o
There is somewhat less of this irrepressiDle
gaiety among the CANADIAN guides fnst tnan aI noths
ing is too impressive or dignifed to be safe from
lest. The Goddess of Liberty is always the
young lady" and Broadway is now Main street,
Prohibition Produces Humor.
Prohibition Jokes are f~avorites among the
guides. In Washington they point out in iowa
Circle a corkscrew, camel, and jug, all represent
ted in shrubbery by clever planting ana trln-
ming. Strangely enough, the shrubbery art was
not inspired by prohibition. The symbols nave
been in Iowa Circle for some years-posslpiy
as a Cassandra like warning of impending rate
1t is only since prohibition that their meaning
has been clear, and the whole story Is not yer
told. On one side of the park there Is a mystic
rios hen done in shrubs which the guide has not
worked into the analogy.
New York has a large assortment Of prompt
ton Jokes. For instance, the fact that a cana
once ran through certain streets OF New YORK
suggests schooners. and schooners suggest
drinks. Hence, the story that schooners used
10 be seen on the streets of New York In canal
davs, and could still be seen there until the dry
ness extended from the streets to interiors
three years ago. ia
We offer this detailed study to show you Ius'
how it is done. Try it on your post ONCE. Un-
earth the ear splitting truth about the town
square. When the personality of the home town
begins to be appreciated the town is ripe for
the rubberneck wagon.
Undoubtedly it is only a question or time
before the most retiring hamlet in the country
will have its bus-model of LELAND Its one
arm driver. who performs on a megaphone with
the other. to meet the trains.
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