davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1921-05-26
GOD BLESS HIM.

From the New York Herald.
Almost 90 years have passed since Joe
Jefferson, seeking a clergyman to read
the burial service over the body of ver-
satile and we'll beloved George Holland,
was told by pastor of little vision that
the funeral of an actor would not be
permitted from the house of God over
which he presided. but that there was
a little church around the corner"
wherein it might be held. God bless
the Little Church Around the Corners"
exclaimed Jefferson, and into Twenty
the Transfiguration. where the Rev.
George Hendrick Houghton received
him with sympathy and understanding.
The name thus given to that church has
achieved worldwide fame; wherever it
is uttered men and women think of
kindly interest, of benevolent assist
ance wisely administered, of friendship
and inspiration from priests whose sim
plicity of mind is the reflex OF their
wide experience and truly Christian
faith.
For George Hendrick Houghton, as
he was good and generous in life, was
fortunate in death to have a worthy
man to succeed him in the rectorship
Of The Little Church Around tho Cor
ner. This was his nephew. the Rev.
George Clarke Houghton, who took up
his uncles office in 1897
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1921-05-26
A SERMON ON WORRY

From the New Orleans Item.
IN VERY day the news dispatches
lT, furnish us texts upon which we
can construct our own sermons.
Here is happening worth thinking
about:
At Havana, Ill, Mrs Emma Schmidt
went to her sons place of business for
a check for 5000 to help his sister
through school. She dropped it on the
way home. but didn't miss it. Alfred,
following close behind, found it where
she had dropped it, but forgot to tell
his mother he had it. Late at night,
Mrs. Schmidt discovered her loss and
began frantic search for the check.
After she had overturned everything
In the house, she went out and paced
up and down the street in the dark
Finally. despairing of it's recovery she
flung herself in the river.
Mrs. Schmidt didn't stop to reflect
that the loss of the check meant no
loss at all; that probably somebody
would find it and return it, that no.
body could get the money on it but
herself, and that if il was never found
all her son needed to do was to write
another check and stop payment on
the missing one. Evidently she took
no one in the house into her confidence.
or her panic wuold have been allayed
She gave way completely to worry. as
some people foolishly do, and 1t finally
made her temporarily insane.
Another instance of the danger Of be-
ing discomposed by trifles is that of
Jacob Rothschild of Omaha. Jacob had
trouble in securing comfortable set
of false teeth. He had had % sets
made, and not one of them was a good
tit instead of going to a new dentist,
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1921-05-26
cApa1rltaMl43aasefH
FIGHT STORMS WITH pELL.


Temple Manning. in the Cleveland Plain
Dealer.
While farmers in this country avert
disaster to their growing crops by every
scientific means in their power, the
peasants of Europe still use magic
means that centuries of failure have
not convinced them are useless. All
over Europe there are quaint ways of
"propitiating the weather." but none is
more interesting than that of ringing
in the storm" common to the Tyrol
From the moment the harvest is be-
ginning to ripen, the Tyrolean farmer
sleeps with his weather eye open and
fixed on the skies. Any particularly
black clouds fills him with gloomy
forebodings, for in the course of a few
minutes the work of the whole year
may be swept away.
Hoping to shield his property from
the powers of evil, he employs every
means his brain can devise, and pins his
faith to the bells that are usually found
on the roof of the Tyrolean farmhouse.
But the farmer who lives nearest
church considers himself the luckiest,
for the bells in the churches ape
thought to have greater power as storm
propitiators than common bells.
That storms still destroy crops in the
Tyrol makes no difference for the good
folks believe IL they had not rung the
bells the destruction would have been
even greater. Anyway you take it, the
bells that ring In the storm" get the
credit for averting disaster.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1921-05-26
ALMANAC 1000 YEARS OLD

BY E. e. Free, Science Service.
n UST 1898 years ago this summer
there assembled to the throne of
Babylon gentleman named
Ammi zaduga. Doubtless he had
among his contemporaries a character
and some reason for distinction. He
was perhaps a big army man or he
advocated including Elan in the Baby
lonian League of Nations. But it is
not for these things he is rememb err ed
now. His excuse for getting into an
article written nearly 1000 years after
his death is a, curious one. He en-
ployed an astronomer.
Back of this there is story; the
story of how two scientists collabo-
rated, though one of them was dead
nearly 40 centuries before the other
one was born.
This story begins with the fact that
we are able to set down the date of
this kind so exactly-s,SSS years ago,
or 1877 B. C. A decade ago we would
not have dared to be so precise. The
record kept in Babylon itself were in
terrupted. of course, when the city
fell to Alexander in 331 B. C.sand
gradually lost it's Importance. AL
though the baked clay documents of
the earlier times furnish tho names
and reigns of many of the kings, there
has been no way in which these docu-
ments could be dated exactly in terms
OF the Christian era. Whether a par
ticular king lived in 1900 or 1900 b.
G. was necessarily a matter of infer
ence and the individual Judgment of
each historian. That this uncertainty
has been replaced by an exact chron-
and his astronomer.
In the collection of clay tablets
brought back by Sir Henry Layard to
the British museum We're two which
proved on translation to contain a
record covering 81 years and giving
the days of the month on which the
planet Venus first appeared and dis
appeared as evening and morning star
successfully. The figures are Of ex-
actly the same sort as you will find
in any modern almanac. The observa-
lions for the eighth year are dated in
the text as having been made in the
eighth year of the reign Of King Am
mi-zaduga.
The purpose of these records was
doubtless to discover whether the
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1921-05-26
LUKE M,LUKE SAYS

Why is it that girl is always trying
to act womanish and a woman il al
ways trying to act girlish?
1t is possible to get your own way
in this world. But you'll have to pay
big price for it.
Even when girl who is worth 800,
900 is shaped Hike a bed slat, it is easy
to fall in love with her figure.
Another Damli: Once upon a time
there was a retailer who didn't claim
that the wholesaler got all the profit
When wife gives her husband a
piece of her mind. she loses something
and he gains nothing.
One nice thing about being a woman
is that you do not have to join the
uniform rank in order to wear a willow
plume.
The reason why mother is sure that
her son is going to be a great man is
because his father is about knee high
to a tumble bug.
Men like 10 talk about the vanity OF
women But the truth of the matter
is that no man is as handsome as he
thinks he is.
A spendthrifts argument is that If
everybody saved their money. how
would anybody get any to save?
Don't believe that woman can't
keep secret! Many a girl IL engaged
to the fellow months before the fellow
even suspects 1t.
Other things may get BY under rca-
sonable doubt. But baking powder and
girls are supposed to be strictly pure.
Any man who can be hypnotized to
do thing wanted to do the thing any
way.
If the whole town were burning down
on Monday morning, lot of women
would pray for no rain because 1t was
wash day.
Copyright. 1919
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1921-05-26
Old Postoffice Site
Should Be Retained

n I would be mistake to sell the old
u postoffice site. Collector of Reve-
nue. Mcneil is right in opposing that
idea.
The larger Birmingham becomes
the greater the interests that the
federal government will have here.
They grow each year. AS the func-
tons of the government expand values
of central property increase and the
more difficult it is to secure sites
for federal purposes at reasonable
figures.
1t also requires time to put through
any kind Of trade in which the gov
eminent has part. Birmingham
will be that much closer to obtain
ing the additional services Of the feder-
al government that will from time
to time become necessary if the real
estate is already in hand.
The Second avenue and Eighteenth
street property should not be dis
posed of, but held for the growing
needs of the government in this sec
ton. Uncle Sam will find need for
all he has in Birmingham.
The city and the county should like
wise hold onto their real estste for
the benefit of future generations. I'M
provig is one thing; turning loose
valuable property held in fee simple
is quite another.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1921-05-26

or trying the dentists of some other
town. Jacob solved his perplexities the
other day by taking his own life.
The worrying habit does not always
lead to such extremes as these, but
it causes much of the unhappiness of
life, both to it's devotee and the in
nocent bystanders. 1t is the most
senseless habit that human beings
can contract. Worrying never stopped
an ache or a pain, never restored
lost money or valuables, never brought
back neglected opportunity nor
the slightest degree. Most of 1t is
done over events which are irrevocably
past. Much of the remainder is over
things that may never happen.
1t is wisdom to safeguard ones self
as far as possible against evil chances,
either impending or possible-and then
to take events as they come; but aft
er loss or any injury has been sus-
tanned it is bad sportsmanship to go
around whining over it. II the loss
can still be averted or minimized, by
all means seek the counsel or help of
those you may depend on. If nothing
can be done about it, forget your
grief. Nothing in this life is irrecov-
cradle, but life itself. Don't shorten
it or waste 1t by useless repining.
With many people, worrying is just
bad habit that can be overcome
without much difficulty. 1t is per-
petual bid for sympathy over trifling
misfortunes and annoyances. 1t poisons
life for all others in the household.
II you are addicted to it, give it up
now, for the sake of their peace of
mind, If you have no regard for your
own
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1921-05-26
WHO IS INDISPENSABLE
the Montgomery Advertiser.

FROM the Montgomery Advertiser.
The New York Evening Post would
be glad to see Mr.. Hughes returned to
the supreme court bench but for the
fact that he is indispensable" as Sec
rotary of State.
Mr.. Hughes is an ornam emit wherever
he is put, but neither Mr.. Hughes nor
any other man is Indispensable" When
we describe any human as ind!spensa-
BILE we over-praise him. One Of the best
things life does is to demonstrate every
day of the year that no man IL indis-
pensable.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1921-05-26

by means of astronomical calculation
Modern almanacs are made, as eyery-
one knows, by advance calculations,
using the known motions of the heav-
emily bodies to predict, for instance. thu
days on which Venus will be even
ing star or morning star during the
coming year. BY extending exactly
this same calculation backward it is
possible to set down the same infor-
nation, that Is the almanac. for any
given year in the past All that was
needed, therefore, in order to date ex
actly the almanac Of King Ammi-
zaduga was to calculate the Venus
data for a century or two at about the
time of the King and then find which
successive Fl years out of this period
agreed with the observed data record
ed in the ancient tablet. This has
been done by DR.. Kugler, the distin-
guished Dutch astronomer. He found
three periods which would fit the an
Gent data, 2041-2020 B. c., 1s77-1s56 b.
c. and 1S5S-1S37 B. C. There is histor-
ical evidence proving that the middle
one of these possible periods is the
correct one, and we have therefore
an exact date in our own chronology
for the reign of this ancient King and
the 1abors of his astronomer.
One wonders what use will be made
of modern almanacs, if any survive.
after another $500 years-twice tho
interval which separates US from tho
time of Christ.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1921-05-26
University of Alabama
a Splendid Institution

COMMENCEMENT exercises at
" the University of Alabama drew
many loyal alumni to the historic in
stitution at Tuscaloosa, which has
played such an important part in the
educational life of this state.
If there were among the visitors
some of the older alumni who have
not seen the university in many years,
they must have been struck by the
great enhancement in the beauty of
its grounds, the improvement in it's
equipment and the increase in the
number Of students, now more than
1000 in all departments.
Although it has been in existence
approximately 100 years, the univer-
sity did not begin it's modern growth
until the incumbency of DR.. J. w.
Abercrombie, now state superintend-
ent of education. DIR. Denny, force
full and able executive who succeeded
DR.. Abercrombie as president, has
carried on the work Of making the
University of Alabama one Of the
strongest educational institutions in
the country and it now holds that
rank.
For years the university struggled
along with inadequate financial sup
port and as result small student
body. But a great expansion has
taken place. Imposing new buildings
have been erected, numerous frater-
nifty houses add distinction to the uni
versity neighborhood and the campus,
always one of the most beautiful in
America, has been improved by re-
moving the athletic field to a new
location.
This growth, however, has brought
increased financial burdens. DR..
Denny states that he does not expect
the number Of students to increase
for a time and further increase
would not be desirable, as the univer-
sity is already taxed to its capacity.
The state legislature should deal gen
ercusly with this grand old institu-
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1921-05-26
Salvation Army Work
a Community Necessitv

7f7HE work Of the Salvation Army
u must go ahead. 1t has taken its
place among the necessities of civil
lied peoples in peace and in war. It
has never flinched. never sought a
soft place, never denied help when it
could help.
At this time in Birmingham it Is
sheltering "a young women and their
babies besides 20 children from week
to years of age, SO human beings
so crowded that many Of them slec 0
on hallway cots and pallets OH the
floor. At another place it houses and
feeds derelict smen until they can get
on their feet again.
These are but two Of the many
methods by which the army reaches
destitute and friendless humanity
otherwise rot reached. For this WORK
III Birmingham $4,000 is no large
sam. Birmingham must raise it and
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1921-05-26
Wear Collar Ornaments.

Marines in the Birmingham district
have been ordered to wear their collar
ornaments at all times on their uni
FORMS" said Sergt. Linn Hill of the
local marine recruiting station. Or
ders to that effect have been received
from Washington recently.
1T is for the purpose of distin-
gushing the marines when they are
indoors and are not wearing their
hats. 1t is a mark of distinction on
the uniform 1t has been done in other
parts of the country, but the orders
were just received in Birmingham"
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1921-05-26
HOW TOAsTs ORIGINATED
m the Detroit News

from the Detroit News,
When John Smith gets up at a BAN
quet and, lifting a glass of legitimate
or illegitimate liquor. calls out: The
ladies', God bless emf" or, Robert
Brown, our honored guestv or what
ever else comes to his mind he doesn't
realize that in thus proposing toast
he is only going through the relic of an
ancient ceremony
Originally, when the ancient Greeks
or Romans were at feast, the custom
was to bow before the statue of Bac-
chus the god of wine, exclaiming. BE
propitious. Bacchus" and pouring 4
little wine on the ground. This was
also done to other gods Emperors be.
ing deified. this honor was paid them.
Then wealthy people and beautiful
women were thus toasted, and the habit
of toasting was established and later
people decided to drink the liquor In.
stead of wasting it.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1921-05-26
ADRIFT WITH THE TIMES

CONSERVATIVE NEIGHBORHOOD.
las a patriotic American, Senator
snortsworthy. what is your opinion OF
bolshevism"
I'm for it,"
"What?"
LAS theme for oratory. It's one OF
the few up-to-date topics a speaker
can handle with invective, sarcasm
and humor down in my part of the
country and not run the risk of losing
votes"
LITTLE LESSON IN THRIFT.
I'm hard up, boss"
did you buy any silk shirts during
the war, when wages were high and
work pIentiful?"
"a few"
well, didn't and 1 don't propose to
help out the people who did. Good
morning"
TELEPATHY.
Il dare say you are on the point
of telling me where to CO." re-
marked the motorist who had smashed
a fender on the car of another mo-
torist.
THAT isn't necessary now" replied
the second motorist. II see you have
already guessed it,"
HENCE THE EXPLOSIONS.
Strong drink is raging, my broth
err" observed the gentleman with u
moral cast of countenance.
You are right about that" replied
Mr.. BIBLES, land if you put too much
sugar in the stuff before bottling 1t
you will discover that its rage is ter
rife" PAUL COOK.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1921-05-26
Help the Army

Birmingham is maintaining its
splendid record in raising funds, and the
Salvation Army campaign will raise it's
quota before the end Of the week, said
DR.. P. H. Woodall chairman of the
community advisory board.
Many business houses and organ
izations are returning the petition
signed 100 per cent, and a number have
not yet returned them, but have noti-
fled the committee that they would
reach the 100 per cent mark in a short
time. and would then send them in.
This campaign has been meeting
with hearty response, and everyons
seems glad to be able to contribute to
the splendid work of this organiza>
ton"
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1921-05-26
HEAVY MILK CONSUMPTION

From the Montgomery Advertiser.
President Harding congratulates the
parents of bankruptcies. one of whom Is
named Warren Harding. It will take
the output of one Jersey COW to keep
the bottles Of this quartet filled and
ready for use.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1921-05-26
GOLD

BY Shakespeare.
o thou sweet king killer, ana dear al
vorce
'Twixt natural son and sire! thou bright
defi1er
OF Hymen's purest bedi thou valiant
Mars!
Thou ever young, fresh lov'd. ana dsal-
cate wooer
Whose blush doth thaw the consecrated
snow
That lies on dams lip, thou visible god,
That solder1t close impossibilities,
And mak'st them kiss! and speakst
with every tongue
To every purpose,
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1921-05-26

~NNJ
Not only the physical relief ex-
tended by the Salvation Army, but
the spiritual regeneration which II
brings about is of essential importance
TO the community. Men and women
either contribute to society or prey
on it, ACCORD ing to their attitude. The
Salvation Army is continuously
changing the wrong into the right
attitude.
y y y
Forty Eight members of the senior
class at Johns Hopkins acknowledged
that they have kissed a girl. The
other members of the class leave ono
under the impression that their edu-
cation Is incomplete
y Il r.
II he can put up with some members
OF the United States Senate, Senator
France sees no reason why he should
not be able to tolerate some of the
views of Russia's bolsheviki That
looks reasonable.
There should be no objection to start
ing at the bottom in trying Germany
war criminals If there is any posi-
bility of ever reaching the men higher
up.
IL corpulent gentleman is observed
elbowing his way to a press seat at
the Dempsey Carpenter fight it is
more than apt to be Col. Irving S.
Cobb, of Paducah.
y 4 y
impeachment charges have been
brought against Sheriff Strength of
Elmore county, possibly on the ground
that he did not typify the strong arm
Of the law.
The enthusiastic welcome given
President Harding by children of New
York's East Side is not necessarily a
vindication of the melting pot
y y y
AS II there were not already enough
trouble and unrest in India, PUSSY
fPot' Johnson will set out for that
country in August
y y 4
lnveighing against women's clothes
promises to give the moralists some
thing to do for at least another 900
years
That proposed clearing house" for
poets would make a great hit with
the bards il it contained a cashiers
window.
Maybe one reason why hooch parties
in apartment houses are SO disorderly
is because there is no head waiter
around to maintain decorum.
X y, y
The approaching fight between Car
pentier and Dempsey has brought out
the cave-man instincts in about 80
per cent OF our population.
y y y
The college wrestler whom Stranrler
Lewis failed to throw in 20 minutes
will enter the ministry and spend his
life wrestling with the devil.
\ x *
The wooden statue of Won linden
burg in Berlin has been offered for
sale as firewood. Alas, that a war
lord should make kettle boil.
y X 4
Great Britain would have less to
worry about If France and Poland
were not so friendly.
y y 4
Just at this juncture it is a bit un-
kind to remind BRAND of his "nape of
the neck" speech
Charles Hapsburg Is looking about
Tor a permanent place of residence.
His first choice is still. Vienna.
+ 4 ~
The capital ship of today is the tub,
of tomorrow, but the overwhelmed tax
payer is expected to carry on"
\ 4 4
According to Chicago dancing mas
ters. the old-fashioned use of feet for
dancing will soon be restored.