davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The New York herald., 1921-04-03
WHY?

authors note: These are some things
that have been bothering me. Possibly
some one knows the answer to some of
them)
FIRST VERSE.
Why should they run in the Subway
When they're not in a hurry, | know?
We all know that Slow can't be driven
So why should they tell us Drive Slow
SECOND VERSE.
Why should the Irishman waiter
In taking my order say our?
And why should l keep up this rhyming
When | also write verse that is free?
authors note The following is free
verse quite free. There are a couple OF
French words which mean the same thing
but do not know how to spell them The
author does not write, speak or think French.
Therefore please overlook our vulgarity In
using Englsh)
THIRD VERSE.
Why speak of "the kids" and mean children
When a kid is a son of goat?
why. too, when I'm asking a question
Do they always address me Jack?
FOURTH VERSE.
Why does the Magistrate fine us
For breaking the laws about speed?
And the traffickman down on the corner
Will bawl US whenever we don't
authors note: Having demonstrated
that can do that stufr just as we'll as n
regular poet, we will now have a return to
normalcy)
FIFTH VERSE.
Why tell us to live on a yeast cake?
Better Bred | pre- -ume they will say?
Why also should Hell" and "Hoboken"
Produce big laugh at a play?
SIXTH VERSE -
Why when you said IL with Flowers
In seeking her love as a boy,
Do you give her broom and some scissors
~ And expect her to tremble with joy?
L'ENVOI.
Why should not bluntly ask questions
When so many things are amiss?
So now that you've purchased the paper
Why stand for such piffie as this?
(Author's note: If you see this In print
blame the Sunday Editor. not me. He has
the authority
The New York herald., 1921-04-03

Special Correspondence to THE NEW YORK
HERALD
CHICAGO, April 2.
TIME Swan Song of that favorite haunt
of Hobohemia, that thirst emporium
where long lines of unwashed un-
kempt iotsam and jetsam were wont to fore
gather the day long in the hope that some
SON Of wealth would slip them "jit," is
being sung In Chicago to-day. The song is
little late. for the object of its verse has
already passed but among certain coterie
such a matter makes little difference. They
are mourning the passing of the Working
mans Exchange. that hoboes' palace at 307
South Clark street, where Alderman Michael
Kenna. better known as "Hinky Dink," held
forth as car or Chicago's "Folst Ward"
The country needs no introduction to
Hinky Dink's place. II is known far and
wide as the place where for almost forty
years the largest and coolest in the city
in the words Of the elect-was obtainable
for nickel-a "jt" in the argot of the
Dink's boys"
The Dink would have you know that pro-
hibition is not the cause that makes his
landmark of the "old days" give way TO a
newer place where food will be sold ex
clusively. albeit Chinese food. The world
famed workingman's Exchange, 70 pass
which in the "old days" one had to run the
gantlet of beary eyed sons of rest Is closed
because old Hi Cost" dealt II knockout
blow
Hinky Dink Explains
Reasons for Quitting
Let the Dink explain its going
prohibition didn't get me-, he announces
Il would have stayed IL had been given
the opportunity Of renewing my lease on
this dump. There was a sort o. verbal
agreement about the renewal, but j suppose
the landlord took II for granted / wouldn't
stand raise Of 100 per cent I'm payin
$500 a month now and the new tenant /
understand, Is going to pay 81 900. ! prob
ably would have stood for reasonable in
crease for the boys sake, but not the boost
for grand. So they rented the place over
my head and now I've got to close up. They
gave me notice to get out.
I've been In the neighborhood about forty
years, but since prohibition I've been losing
money. But had TO have a hangout for
the boys, and / was willing to stand the loss.
But grand a month"; Wen. that's differ
ent. And that's ALL Hinky Dink's Work
ipgmans' Exchange Is closed. and amt
gonna open again some place else
The DinlS's saloon was known far and
wide as just "I1inky Dinks." To the Chi
cagoan no address was necessary. Every
Windy Cityite knew the Dink and his place.
They knew that all the policies Of the First
Ward machine were promulgated there. as
were mony Of the policies Of the city itself.
The New York herald., 1921-04-03
JINXES, 'HANTS' AND OTHER IMPORTANT
Two Dollar Bill May Be Unlucky, but There
Are Ways to Foil the Hoodoo-Gems
in Prose and Poetry

had many thrills in il. The usual convenient
friend told this man that if he wouli put
the liquor In two gallon can and cover Il
with half gallon of gasoene. the gasolene
being lighter. would not mix with the liquor,
and the latter being the bottom, would
not smell If the Sheriff demanded the right
to take Whit. The thing sounded right
so the man did it. When he got home he
siphoned off the gasolene and then near
The New York herald., 1921-04-03

authors note: These are some things
that have been bothering me. Possibly
some one knows the answer TO some Of
them.)
The New York herald., 1921-04-03

JULIUS CESAR: A TRAGEDY. BY William
Shakespeare, Stratford- Avon. Olden &
Antique, Ltd
The New York herald., 1921-04-03

~ ARNEY REILLY of New York. who
~ was at one time in the business end
of the show business. first with Saw
age and later with Klaw & Erlanger, but
who is now broker down in the financial
district. says he dreamed a musical joke the
other night 1t seems that he has often
dreamed good thoughts that he had forgotten
by morning that he formed the habit OF
placing a pencil and pad at his bedside at
night.
Several mornings ago he woke up ana
upon reading his pad he found this written
upon it:
o.-"Can Home, Sweet Home be played
with variations?"
A-"Yes, 1t can be done in flat"
TAMES j. FARNSWORTH, now in the
moving picture business up on Forty
J second street, at one time in the
-eal estate business in a little town near
Miami, Fla He had very faithful negro
working for him who was always willing to
help out in an emergency. Mr.. Farnsworth
wondered why one particular house he had
on his list was vacant all the time Aven
when places to live we're in demand until
this negro told him.
"Dey done got out er tale bout de hants
in dat house." said the boy. "Dey says she's
des hatchery erlive wild 'em. OATS why yo'
can't do nothin wild it."
II developed that the negro did not believe
in ghosts and he agreed to sleep several
nights in the house for Mr.. Farnsworth
The New York herald., 1921-04-03

Uncle George" he said. here is a gall
Ion of liquor that l do not like. / will give
you big drink of it and IL you want it you
can have the whole gallon"
The New York herald., 1921-04-03

threw fit when he tasted his liquor. 1t
was awful
He had an old darky working around the
place, so he called him IN.
The New York herald., 1921-04-03

TORREsT ADAIR, who is in the real
estate business down in Atlanta and
who year or two ago was the impe-
risl potontate of the Shriners, tells a yarn
about man who lived in Decatur, Ga near
him, and who had q gallon of corn liquor
which he wanted 70 take from his Office to his
home Now the Sheriff OF the county was ac-
tive about that time and Transporting liquor
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1921-04-18

memories to see II there has been n
stroke oar as light as Mitchell in so
important race in the past. Many
say there has never been others arc
inclined 90 wait and look up the rec
ords. AZ present. however. IL seems
that Mitchell is at least one Of the
lightest men ever TO stroke a varsity
eight in such race.
Pennsylvania covered the distance in
minutes and q seconds. just 4 seconds
better than Yale was clocked in. The
time IL not considered fast in view Of
the record that is some 30 seconds bet
ter. but all things considered, the fog,
condition Of the river, and other rea-
sons, the time was excellent and au-
gurs we'll for the future success Of
Mitchell and his pals.
'Of course / am happy" said Coach
Joe Wright this morning. The varsity
eight rowed n beautiful race and Mitch
ell stroked them like veteran. Inst
year he did the same kind of work in
the 15O- pound eight. which won the
championship. We will start work this
afternoon in preparation for the Childs
Cup race on the Harlem River on MAY
IA"
The junior eight stroked by Bill Cone.
land, lost the race 10 Yale by little morn
than half length after making a
valiant fight to win. Had il not been for
the fact that Rush in the middle OF ths
boat took sick after the first half mile
the Red and Blue might have won the
race.
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1921-04-18
CHAMP NOT STRONG
FOR FRUSH BATTLE
KiIbane Turns Deaf Ear to Balti-
more offers--Danny Boxes
in Camden Tonight
CHANEY MEETS BENJAMIN
RyLOJ1JS II. JAFFE

Sammy Harris. Of Baltimore. is in
Philadelphia today. Sam is the king
pin manager of boxers in the Oriolc
city. and he is anxious to be Mt the
helm Of another worlds champion. 1Iar-
ris. as you know. used to guide Kid
Williams when that little chunk Of
mnuling material was boss Of the ban.
tam division.
Said SamI today: Baltimore Is
ready TO stage featherweight cham
pionship contest Mt the drop of the
hat. with Danny Frush as the person
of the second part. But. for some reason
or other. the promoters in Baltimore
cannot get n rise out Of Johnny Kill
bane.
"I know Of an offer of $4,000 that
has been made Kilbane for 15-round
contest to referees decision against
Frush, and another one of S15.m0.
but Kilbane apparently is suffering from
writer's oramp. He hasn't even ac-
knowedged receipt of these offers.
Boxes In Camden
Fruah is here with Harris and so Is
Knockout George CLANCY. Both Frush
and Chaney are In the vicinity for
punching purposes. They nre scheduled
70 appear in respective bouts at the
Camden Sportsmen's Club tonight, on
the first program of n series to be held
by Herman Taylor before he starts put
ting on open air shows at one of the
ball parks here.
CLANCY Is to answer the tingle of the
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1921-04-18
143- POUND STROKE
LEADS PENN TO WIN
Eddie MitcheITs Stout Heart
Carries Red and Blue to
Victory Over Yale
COACH WRIGHT IS HAPPY

Coach Joseph Wright. the Canadian
tutor Of the University of Pennsylva-
MIA. is vindicated. When Sir Joseph
decided some weeks ago that Eddie
Mitchell, weighing 143 pounds, was to
BE- the stroke of the Red and Blue
varsity, there was considerable doubt
expressed by those well versed in
rowing knowledge that the move was
n wise one. How much the better was
tho wisdom of Wright to that of his
critics was exhibited In the dusk of
Saturday night on the HousatOnic River
M in Derby. Conn. when the light
weight Mitchell strokcd his varsity
boat across the final line full length
ahead Of the widely heralded Yale
eight.
II was the wonderful stroking of
Mitchell and the superwork of his seven
pals that earned Penn one of her big
gpst victories Of the year. Mitchell
brought his strength from somewhere
among his l43 pounds of bone and
flesh and stroked his eight to victory.
And the best part of the victory and the
surprising part az we'll was the fresh
nrSs Of the Red and Blue biadesmen at
the conclusion Of the race. This can
be attributed 10 the early start the can
didates had in the outdoor work and
the fnct that Wright brought them along
slowly.
The intercollegiate world Is agog over
the wonderful performance of the Penn
eight, and Mitchell In particular. Old
timers are talking of the prowess of the
Ardmore lad and are checking up their
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1921-04-18
Rang Davis Tournament

gong in bout with Joe benjamin. of
Frisco. This Is TO be the final fracas
and is scheduled for ten rounds. Frush
is paired with Tommy Cleary, Of Mana =
yunk. and this set to, the second match
on the card. is to be an eight rounder.
Another ten round match will be be-
tween Danny Kramer. of Philadelphia,
md Joe O'Donnell: the rugged Glouccs-
tor gloveman. In the opening set to. an
light round tilt Battling Murray will
represent Philadelphia against Johnny
Rosncr, Of New York.
Al Wagner Has Stamina
Knockout Al Wagner. best Of the
local comeback boxers, proved on sat
Urday night that he had n lot Of STAN
ina, in addition to gamencss, grit and
rccupcrative powers. For five and a
half rounds Andy Chancy displayed at
the National Club that he was Wagner <
master. then Al turned about. flared up,
rallied and finished lot stronger than
the Baltimore battlpr. However, Wag-
ncr's rally failed TO even up matters
nnd Andy stepped from the ring win
ncr. but not by big margin.
Wagner seemed TO have trouble start
ing early in the bout. Every time he
led he was met by Chaney's straight left
or right cross. and at close quarters
Andy pummeled Al hard around the
body. Several times the South Phila
delphia Italian was staggered by
punches on the chin or was half doubled
up by body blows.
But after the sixth round was about
half over. Wagner brought into play m
attack for which CLANCY failed to find
defense 1t was the we'll known
aerial bombardment OF johnny Dun
dee. and Wagner seemed to out Dundee
the New Yorker. Time and again Wag-
ncr smOthered Chnney with his leaping
lunches, and AIS rally SO impressed his
followers that they were in frenzy
until the final gong sounded.
Kid Wagner crossed the dope when he
returned n winner over Hughey Hutch-
son by n margin. The former had the
better Of four rounds, one was even and
the other belonged to Hutch Wagner
has been showing improved form every
time he has gone TO the post.
Tommy Devlin won from Tommy Nc
Cam. Johnny Paxson beat Billy Gan
non and Billy Hines stopped Whitley
Burke In the fourth.
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1921-04-18
JUNIOR CATHOLIC
LEAGUE FORMED
Four-Team Circuit Will Play
Saturdays at 47th and
Spruce Streets
HlLL0ALE STARTS DRILL

a new baseball league. the Junior
Catholic League Of West Philadelphia,
was launched at meeting held In the
clubrooms of st. Francis De Sales Bat
TALON, Forty seventh street and Spring
field avenue. Plans were completed for
the formation of four team league.
Representatives from St. Francis,
Moorlyn G. c. and victrix c. G. we're
in attendance and the following officers
elected: James Byrncs, secretary, and
James McGill. treasurer. Frank e.
Loughran ACTED as chairman. All
games will be played at Forty seventh
and Spruce streets on Saturday after
Moons. the first to start at = p. nj. and
the second at 4 p. m.
a silver loving cup will be presented
the winning team and numerous other
awards will be provided for individual
players. The next meeting will decide
on the fourth member Of the organiza-
ton. For information write Frank F..
Loughran, 1908 South Forty sixth
street.
Hilldale Starts Work
Manager Ed Bolden, Of IIildale, will
have eighteen players at Hilldale Park
this afternoon to start the first workout
on the home grounds. The Darbyites
open the season next Saturday. when
they travel to Twenty sixth and Reed
streets and play Fleisher The follow
ing Tuesday they tackle Dobson at Fast
Falls, and on Friday, April 30. jour
ney to Bridesburg and play Ed Caskey' s
club.
The western clubs will come east in
June and the local fans will &c a chance
to see strong independent teams play In
Darby and Camden. Saturday, April
90. Fleisher plays at Hilldnle; Sunday,
May 1, Hilldale. at Newark, double
header Saturday, May Z. Lit Bros, at
Ililldale; Sunday. May 3. Hilldale at
Newark. morning and afternoon. and
Thursday. May IL. Hilldale at Pencoyd.
Bob Bailey. an infelder, and Fred
Daniels, a pitcher, from Texas, are ex q.
perted to strengthen the regulars.
Brown, Dobbins and Stevens are prom
Using youngsters, who will fight 1t out
York, catchers Wbitwork, Cockrell,
Rector and Flournoy, pitchers; Allen
Cummings, Downs and Francis, in
fielders; White, Briggs and Johnson,
outtielders, all look good as most of
them have been wintering In Cuba,
Palm Beach and Los Angeles and play
ing there.
South Philadelphia Recreation has n
fast travelling team. Manager Musi has
signed Markley, right field; Williams,
catcher; Lanzallo, center field; Crosse,
first base; Oresti, third base; Oliver.
shortstop; Perry. second base, and
Schilling, left field.
Musi will take care of the hurting.
He would like to hear from Nativity.
Stetson, Marshall f.. Smith. Hilldale,
Camden City and teams Of this caliber
Address Anthony Musi, 2314 South
Hutchinson street.
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1921-04-18
THE u. S. ROYAL CORD

A famous tire-a famous tread. Acknowledged
among motorists and dealers alike as the worlds
foremost example Of Cord tire building. Alway.
delivering the same repeated economy, tire after
tire, and season after season.
The stripe around the sidewalks is registered as
trademark in the u. S. Patent Office.
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1921-04-18
REAL SPORTSlMANSHZP
IN WORLD OF TENNIS
nos,ite Supreme ability OF Tilden and Johnston,
More Than Dozen Nations Bid for Davis Cup
Tourney-Entirely for the Came Itself
by GRANTLAND RICE

much harder blow. That sounds rca-
sonable, doesn't it? ii. l.. +.
TNltIS SPEAKER may be a tffile
bald and trihc gray but there is
nothing very aged about his batting eye
or his outfielding legs. The ton Of the
head appears to be minor matter. II
conditions are properly adjusted about
two inches lower down.
MTE SOMETIMES wonder what ball
w players who are turning down
$4,000 offers are going to do to earn
$4,000 in other ways?
TNHE noted scientist who discovered
l. Betelgeuse has yet been unable to
discover why English fight fans insist
upon paying out money to see Bonn
bnrdler" Wells and Joe Beckett ex-
change blows. This planet has i.s mys-
teries to compare favornbly with any
thing space has TO offer.
COPYRIGHT. 1891. All rights deserved
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1921-04-18
TIE Il e, leeiti1133attss ts use :;

AMONG advertisers it has become an un.
n written law that the word "best' should
never be used in talking about ones own product.
Anybody can claim to be "best".
But getting the public to believe it is another
matter.
The only way manufacturer honestly knows
his product is "best' is when millions of people
give it their unanimous OK.
This is just as true of tires as anything else
Notice how many u. S. Royal Cord Tires YOU
see in your own community. Notice, too, that
when man has one Royal Cord on his car, he
generally has toar-and maybe a spare or two
besides.
Stroll along any Automobile Row in the coun.
try and see how many different cars are making
Royal Cord Tires one of the attractions.
Hob'nob with u. S. Tire dealer and listen to
what he says. ''''~' - ~
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1921-04-18
Heavy Snowfall Halts
CLeueIdnd.DetrOit Series

Detroit, April 1s. Navin field
Is blanketed with snow several
inches deep and indications are
that none OF the games Of the open
ing series between Detroit and
Cleveland will be played this week.
The snowfall began late Saturday
night and continued Sunday
afternoon, postpopement Of the
opening game with Cleveland being
announced early in the afternoon.
The Tigers have played but two
games, one OF them in a steady driz-
zle Of rain, since the season opened.
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1921-04-18

Jory ERan, West Philadelphia welter-
weight, who whipped Vic Warner lRst week
Is training daily and he issues challenges to
Sharkey.
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1921-04-18
Aim Blow at Baseball "Holdouts"

Chicago, April IA blow at baseball
"holdouts' was delivered by the major
when a rule was adopted providing that
players under reserve who fail to report tc
their clubs within zen days after the open.
ing Of the championship season would BE-
placed on the ineligible list and that the
applications of such players for reinstate-
X NJ. Lands.
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1921-04-18

much harder blow. That sounds rea-
sonable, doesn't 1t? ii. l.. L.
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1921-04-18

There nrc letters In tho SportsDcpa rtment
Of the EvESiSG PuBLtC LEpGER for Joe Ken
nody, Harry Gordon. Wilus Britt, Bobby
Gunnis and Herman HindiD
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1921-04-18

The I'mpire's PSnim OF Strlie
Tell NC not in moIrntW numoers @
ThGt an mp Sc"S md rho siumbers
For LIZ Me M Epcrs guards his team.
H"''e u"
sy. :, ,eoI strife Is earnest,
Ind the grave is soon or goat
rns,ed thou art to oussed refrrnesf,
Stands the token OF our ro'e.
tr the games rae field OF odthe,
Through the birondc ana me SrVe'
Ubat are ice but driven Gdtte,
Branded iCith the pocd' E"Ve'
=. .;.J.,
LireS OF ump1es o' to"t 81, hand
We muSt sp'1,.. ,o,r, 70 behind "a
Or, depnrting, H. -, tLc sopd.
foo'' "
,J Jo;,,
Let as msh -. p",o o,r ,ote
Ere ool'e III ,bo boo;n1
And ~ SPne y ,.,, at tbo niGfe.
Learn 10 c"'' -"
Ii, ,o
MlIll1, asks
wv ,,tchcr. shouldn't we slip Ruth
,..o,tional passpsp Is there anything
,nU';Sntontionai about his home runsE
o"'''''' ,v,-,d n. largo
Sport and the ""'" q"
THERE is a strong inclination upon
.h0 ,ort of n good many citizens Of
NV ot;nn Kan n imagine that that par.
e,D,,or ea.,i ," nation is most highly surchargcd
uiu,", 'Ii.I s,ort ortsmanship.
VII" 'PO' .,ia ,osnoct ve,d l;ke'to offor
ny !" ,.inf .n' for Tho world Mt large,
polite Or'ei ~, % 80 tbo noris Cr,
CCnsluer .,. .ne ,I oioor,v proved tint III.
We nave Trtt.! .'aH a.n, s,,nron,o Th;o
foct s is established as clearly as any
thing can be cStaolish'd IN sport
Under such conditions me attempt TO
win the Davis Gup "ouiu iook 10 gs
such torIorn cnance that le" would
care to risk the time' money ana 'nort
IN the assault. =,
Yet, in the face OF thls oarrler, with
the odds all against them, we have more
than dozen nations exceedingly Keen to
enter the joust Just for the sport itself.
They would like to win, OF course.
But they cant very well expect to
win
Yet they have all rallied to the oc.
cason in way that only 100 per cent
sportsnen could rally. They have in
His case certainly put the playing of
the game above victory alone, for most
Of them know they haven't even the
rpmotest chance to beat two such ten
mis- stars as Tilden and Johnston, even
II they worked their way into the chsl-
eGEe rEunu' ~ =.
verse NJ large, with fbe accent On ~,
foreign nations. one might ston for a
moment ond consider tbe case ~ tba
Davis Gun
Cpovrp C1 EvTI,S,D .,r
" ANDER s,.nnod ;,,o ,.,o ,..
play tust ten years ago this spring, He
was star from his first appearance,
and today he Is the last of the Old
Guard Of pitching stars in the National
League, that once numbered Christy
Mathewson and Three Fingered Brown.
We recall back in 1910 where two ex-
pert scouts turned him down on account
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1921-04-18

Thousands of tire dealers today carry n,
other tires but United States. Thousands NOR
are arranging their stocks SO that they ma,
become 1909 u. S. dealers within the next few
months.
We are IN year, not only Of better tires, bu
OF better tire service
No motorist today needs TO experiment witt
tires unless he wants to.
Any man who has had enough of "bargains'
Surplus stocks" and Discount offers" can 90 TO
y. S. dealer and get fresh, Hve tire of cu,yen
manufacture.
He can get economy Of the kind that is base,
on full moneys worth. Not somebody's CUES
not a purchase made on hope-but tina
surest of all saving that is backed bv the ooo'
faith OF the oldest and largest rubber compan
in the world.