Omaha daily bee., 1921-07-31
Problems That Perplex
Answered by
BEATRICE FAIRFAX
WHATS the TroubJep

- tuc ll'uDiC.
Dear Miss Fairfax: l am another
one Of those disgusted wives. Am
II years old, have been married
three years, have one little boy IA
months old and will soon have an
other. Miss Fairfax, my husband
has certainly been q puzzle to me
for the last year. He Is out of work
and does not seem to care in the
least. He has not worked for J.
months He has been offered sew
eral good positions but turned them
all down because he said they did
not pay enough wages for the
amount Of work done. He seems
to want big wages for little work.
When we were first married, we
lived with his parents but just be-
fore our baby was born we went to
stay with my parents and here we
have been ever since. / was work
ing for a while but as l am unable
to work now, it leaves us entirely
to the support of my parents.
never have asked him for cent
of money, and what he has given
me has been given just because he
wanted to give 1t to me. If l ask
him to do anything for me, he re-
fuses and thinks / am more able
to wait on myself.
When he is at home he complains
of being sick all the time and per-
haps in the next half hour he will
be out playing ball or horseshoes.
He seems to care a great deal for
ne, and when / speak Of leaving
him, he ALWAYS begs me to please
stay and he will go out and work If
he has to dig dirt. This goes by
and he forgets that he has ever
said It.
Now. please. Miss Fairfax, will
you advise me what to do?
My feelings are like this: When
he speaks kind to me and treats
me like a human. l feel that |
love him and would like to stay with
him. but when he is cross and re-
fuses to do for me rs a husband
should, I feel that | hate him and
never want to see him again. Is
this true or false love? Should /
leave him or stay with him and be
dependent on my parents? Please
tell me how to settle my difficulties.
Thanks MARY.
think any woman makes mis-
take when she goes to her people,
or even her husbands people, to
live after marriage. 1t gives the
man such an easy chance to shift
responsibility, and it is so much
harder to keep perfect harmony
when two families live together.
do not advise you to leave your
husband now. The time may come
when you will have to. but since you
really seem to care for him make
one big. strong effort to redeem him
from what seems to me to be in
excusable laziness. These are the
things you should do:
First, make sure your husband is
in good health. His laziness might
arise from tuberculosis or other i'll
ness Then by all means insist upon
your own little home. Let 1t be
ever so small, even one room, but let
1t be yours. Your husband will then
Afeel responsible for paying the rent
>Snd buying the food. Don't COM
plafnA If things aren't perfect. If
he VIII work and pay the necessary
bills you may hope for a gradual
Improvement A man likes to be
seIf-respecting. >H He hates himself
when he is not and 1t makes him
srouchy and irritable. Don't let
others do for your husband. par
ticularly your folks. / feel sure II
YOU can manage to get your hus-
band to move into your own home.
YOU will be able to work out your
problem. At least try that before
you resort to divorce. which can
plainly see you do not want.
Heartdck Girl: Now, my dear
child, you get right over the idea
that you have wrecked your life.
You have done wrong, but you have
the right idea of life and If you take
hold Of yourself in good and strong
way you will make a fine. useful
citizen in the world. BY all means
explain to the boy and strike out
on a new path. l wish I could talk
to you. You need courage and
strength. Seize them for yourself.
But do not repeat your mistakes.
That would prove you all you think
S->urself.