The Brattleboro daily reformer. (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1913-1955, 1921-04-20
BY DAVID LAWRENCE.

hension of United States senators. But
none other than John Sharp Williams,
Democratic senator from Mississippi, and
Boies Penrose, Republican senator from
PENNSYLVANIA, have publicly confessed
that they do not understand the theory
of relatively propounded by Professor
Einstein. And what is even more shock
ing. they have gone so far as to suggest
that they didn't believe any body else
either inside or outside of the senate
understood the thing either. This is how
| it happened:
| Senator Williams is talking about the
''steam roller which the Republicans adj
/ nit they are about To apply over the
heads Of their Democratic brethren in the
matter of appointing committees in the
lSenatc. Says Mr.. Williams with his far
/ famed plOquence: Il understand how
great intellect can roll over common pie
bian minds l understand how great
scientist like Isaac Newton could bring
/ into the world n new principle that would
| control mankind forever. But | do not
Understand how a political steam roller
can control a democratic country of toll
Ierably intelligent people Mark you.
| did not say intelligent people, said
tolprably intelligent people. | recognize
/ that - out of 100 men are not very in
Itclligcut at all. but ] do not understand
! how a partisan steam roller without any
7 $|tElBlal ATTRIBUTES. without any ~t'tpl-
/ titic attributes, without any intellectual
attributes. without any moral eXccllcncy.
Imercly the cXcellenCv i'm membership in
some so-called party. could manage to con-
troll a country which imagincS itself in
ItoIloCtual | say 'imagiuGS itself because.
| Judging by the last election. it has got
long way to 20 to know it is intelligent.
PenrOse ON EinStein.
| Mr. PenroSe replies thus: The Sena-
tor referred very eloquently 10 Newton
and others who have contributed to sci
encc. | know the senate would patiently
| listen to him if he would explain his
views on EiuStein'S theory of rclativity.'
! Mr.. Williams answered: II have long
cOntended that the wittieSt, the vagucSt.
and the most indefinite man i'm this body
| is tho senator from PennSy lvania. but
did not know until this morning that he
could discover anything more vague or
indefinite than himself | frankly confess
that | do not understand Einstein. /
| frankly confess that / do not believe the
senator from Pennsylvania understands
/ EinStein. | frankly confess that ] do
not believe the senator from Connecticut
| Mr.. Brandcgeel would even contend that
he understood Einstein. and / do not be
| Gcve that even the senator from AIaSSa-
chusctts tNIr. LODGE would make a very
positive pretenSe in that direction
| Whereupou Mr. PenroSe rcjoiuS: Il
own a volume of EinStcin in the introduce
ton Of which it is stated that there are
only - men in alLthe world who under
stand the book. | thought, perhaps. the
senator from Mississippi was one of
| them. | confess that | have nearly lost
my mental faculties in trying to under
| stand Einstein.'
Williams UnsqUeIched.
Not to be squelchcd. however, Senator
| Williams continues: Il believe it is the
Earl of Derby who once said that there
were only two men who ever understood
the Near Eastern question that one of
them was dead and that he himself was
getting old and had pretty nearly forgot
item it all. So far as Einstein is CON
lCerned. | did endeavor for little while to
understand Einstein. / do not believe
the senator from Pennsylvania ever even
tried. but ] frankly had the wisdom to
confess that | did not understand Elm
stein. However. | do understand that
there are certain great fundamental car
dinal principles of fairness which exist in
the world and | know the senator from
Pennsylvania knows that. too"
1t is al this point that Senator Brande-
gee abruptly removes the discussion from
the domain of Einstein and brings it back
! to the practical problem of giving the
Democrats six members on important com
mittees to the Republicans 10. instead OF
six and nine, which was the ratio before
the Republicans won such an Overwhelm-
ing victory in the last election.
Brandegees Notions.
Il believe in the intelligence of the
American people, says Mr.. Brandegee
The Republican party will go out OF
power some day. | remember eight wears
ago, IN 1872. when we came back here anC
we were out and YOU were in. and the
pulchritudin0uS senator from North Caro-
lima, Mr.. Overman, who now refrcsheS tn,
galleries with his senatorial beauty. me
me at the door here and assured me thai
the Democratic party was in power fol-
1.-THE next 30 years, and wanted to know
what | meant. being corpse and buried
in walking around here and pretending t
be alive. Times change and men change
| with them. We NAV go out. of course
but if we do we will do it as your honOreC
vice president did. with a smile on his fac
and with a brave heart. Whenever TIN
public get tired of the Republican party
of course, they viii put them out. The,
- course. Generally. those intermissions ar
very few and far between. Nevertheless
the mutations and bleatings and squeal
we have heard for the last week from on
Democratic friends about this very fai
program we have adopted are about t
lsubside.'
. The tumult and the shouting dies
The captains and the kings DEPART An
the steam roller is about to start =
Whercupon the senate hears a closin
lOration by Senator Williams, who point
out that he has heard of the steam role
before. in the days of Aldrich when DOLL
YER was the insurgent and in the days @
, Joe Cannon'S Speakership i'm the house O
representatives About all that Senate
Brandegee has proven" remarks Mr.. Wi
liams. lis that the senator from Mort
Carolina, Mr.. Overman, made about tn
same mistake that he is making now, a,
sorting that when a party got into powe
il stayed in power forever. and all it ha
- to do was to be selfish and take all til
power it could"
Thus is the senate returning to MOI
\ malcy. with its conversation about New
ton and Einstein, steam rollers and insul
lgency and moot questions as to the rel,
tive intelligence of the electorate.
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