davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1921-04-29
Other Editors Than Ours
INTRODUCING YOURSELF.
CBy DIR. William II. Barton.

There is a person whom I should like to have
You meet. and whom I desire the pleasure of in
PRODUCING to you. That person is yourself Please
take a good look at yourself in the glass and make
your best bow.
Socrates asked you to be acquainted with this
person, and did Pope, and did many other
distinguished people regret that you do not know
yourself well as you ought. There are many men
Of whom ". E Eagan might have written:
he read the books which all the wise writ;
He searched the world for knowledge not for pelf
lie thought no man unknown keen his wit.
But he met a stranger-'twas himself"
This stranger TO whom 1 introduce you is well
worth your knowing. You know him but superficial
y. Much that is best in him you do not know. You
familiar with the commonplace details OF his
life, but you do not sufficiently recognize his aspira
tons his worthier purposes. his real and true ma
ture.
said 10 stern
II expect to live longer than you and 70 conduct
your funeral service. I going tell people that
you fraud"
He started 10 be angry. then stopped, for he felt
that had not meant II unkndly went
You have bluffed your way through life,
ceadng all that is best in you. and everywhere
putting your foot foremost. You have tried
10 act as II you were hard -hearted and have act
ed If you ashamed Of all that you have
most reason 70 be proud Of I know that you have
a very tender heart"
His eyes filed with tears. and he said
Boy. boyi How did you find that out?"
1 only wish he had found 10 out earlier. I wish
all men would discover their best selves. They
live such grabbed, narrow, mean and fretfu lives
strangling their better selves.
stand up and make a bow 20 your best self and
SIT and make for him. He d.
serves
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1921-04-29
PLUCKED EYEBROWS.

Back in 1920 the elder DIsraeH wrote an
China the girls continually plucking their eye
erows that they may be thin and long"
He spoke Of this custom among the Chinese IN
essay feminine fashions Prevailing in be-
lighted countries like China, Turkey and Africa
He cited it as an example of the lengths to which
women in those lands will go in order to conform
20 their peculiar notions Of beauty.
He described the Chinese custom of pucking
eyebrows in connection with similar customs else
vhere. such the practice of the of
Greenland who color their faces blue and yellow;
and the fashion of painting the face red among
native Of India; and the custom in ancient
Persia Of breaking the in order to give the
Rquilne contour.
Thank goodness" the ladies' of DIsraers time
eoubuessly exclaimed. fashion does no: condemn
us 20 such atrocities"
And he would have been regarded ASIA crazy
prophet wEo would have predicted that 100 years
later, women in America and Europe would be
having their eyebrows plucked in order to pro-
luce thin and long effect so popular in China.
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1921-04-29
THE DOUBLE MOTIVE BEHIND THE
"PRO-PRlMARY'' MANDAMUS CASE

Institution OF mandanus suit TO force the hold
Ing of the city primary, despite the provisions OF
the commission manager enabling act suspending
that primary incident TO the proceedings there
under, while claimed TO be a friendly act. appears
rather TO be bit Of political strategy maneuverng
for position between two opposing forces,
antagOnistc 10 each other but both anxious u
have the commission manager election sidetracked.
Both the Carson and the Seebirt factions OF the
republican party-with the Office Seeking Mutual
Admiratonists OF Bourbon Democracy sand
WICKED in between them.-seem contendng upon
sdvise OF the usual grist OF unconstitutional
lawyers that the enabling law IS invalid and all
proceedings hereunder faulty. The night the
courts IS really for advantage as between the
factions in case their "wish"-tre father OF the
thought"-can DE realized upon. regardless OF
hooks crooks
Remember, First Of all the purpose is to ward
off adoption OF the commission-rnanager system;
that much in the interests OF the politicians office
seekers. and their henchmen generally. Secondly.
rhe Seebrt aggregation IS suspicious OF the Carson
fac1on-knowing that it has its arm W its sleeve.
and pretends 70 be bringing its mandamus sui;
70 prevent The latter from bringing an injunction
proceeding later. and perhaps winning out on it
sitter that viii leave the former without
much standing The idea IS unique. The seebirt
crowd convinced. welanteiDato BY virtue of its
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1921-04-29

1t is customary for people who
would say it with bricks, while you
are alive to say it with flowers af-
ter you have been tipped over. And
doubtless they mean well enough,
but too often the spirit IS willing
while the meter is weak. I embalm-
ed Cob, happy word) this idea once
in faultless verse which purled along
somewhat in this fashion:
Just inside the outside portal,
Called (by some) the Golden Gate,
Stood the spirit of a mortal
Who had just arrived of late,
And he voiced a ghOulish chortle
That was cluttered up with hate:
II am waiting for a geezer,"
We're the words he said to me;
Il shall land upon his beezer
Very hard and fluently
For the In Memoriam wheeze, or
Rather verse, he wrote, I. e.:
Tn Loving Memory of my Friend
Alexander Blubbits.
He has died and went to heaven.
His friends, in their sorrow, weep;
Why did you leave US, Alexander?
When do you suppose we will ever
meet2
You are gone but not forgotten,
In my memory you remain;
Every time I think of you
1t gives me a pain"
NOE 10 s,,-
was a typical eulogy, but that isn't
so. It is much broader in spirit and
deeper in meaning than the average
oulogy. Which is one of the reasons
why we all hate TO die: we know that
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1921-04-29
More Truth
Than Poetry
By JAMES ]. MONTAGUE
A MISTAKE sONrEWHERE.

"A y
Paint the inside of the house blue
and you will get rid of the flies
The New York Daily News.
1.-The fly" the paper said.
Us pleased by any hue
Or tone of pink or red,
But hates the shade of blue.
If blue is on the wall.
The microbe bearing fly
Will not do we'll at all;
In fact he'll shortly die"
And so the brush we piled.
Till walls and floors as we'll
And everything inside
The house wherein we dwell
The staircase and the hall,
The cellar, areaway,
And garbage cans. were all
AS blue as Baffin's Bay.
"Ab!" we grimly said.
With triumph on our face,
The flies will soon be dead
That enter in this place.
No more they'll brighten us
with their ill-favored sheer;
Their deadly bacillus
Will swiftly wither here"
The weather now is warm,
The house IS overlooked
With flies that flock and swarm
All over our abode
In pastures pertly quaint
They stand around and scoff.
They lighted on our paint
And simply ate il off
Copyright, 1920
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1921-04-29
APRIL %. 1921
WAGES AND COST OF LIVING.

"The administration does not expect labor 20
do all There must be further reductions in
the cost Of living that will enable the work.
ingman to accept reduced wage
This paragraph, quoted from Washington goes
very OF the big problem pressing
for solution. That problem Is to find new level
where wages cost Of living can with
sonable equity to all concerned That the admin
istration realizes that there is great dis
crepancy between the production and retail sales
costs those things which the workingman
buy is a good sign.
We suspect that Mr. Hoover Is largely response
bic for this administration roint of view. It IS
probably unfair the retailer charge all of this
machinery OF distribution. Between him and the
original manufacturer brokers' jobbers whole
So ers and whatnot all performing
asefuI functions the profit Of which
dnally translated into terms Of price the
ailer.
on top OF this the retailer is entitled a fair
croft What the workingman. any other
'umer is interested in is what he pays to the
'aier. This is the figure that be taken into
account when OF living. in its relation to
wages, is being considered.
There Is no doubt that much OF the recent talk
shout reduced OF living is based upon de-
creased prices received by the manufacturer and
farmer Some OF this great decrease has been
ected in retail prices. but not enough to stimulate
buying the extent that it must be stimulated
before there be return of real prosperity.
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1921-04-29
Ignorant Essays
By ]. P. McEVOY

the question, 90 Grave, where is thy
Victory; Oh Death. where is thy
Sting" is not entirely rhetorical
The Sting is the bum eulogy which
some friend will write for us.
Now 1 propose to rob Death Of
one Of it's terrors. Instead Of look
ing forward with dread to eulogies,
let US inaugurate the policy of hav-
ing mylogies. In other words, pre-
pare your own eulogies in advance;
write them with care or have an ex-
pert write them; polish them off
neatly and then file them away
with your best pose, where the win
dow can find them easily when the
reporters come around.
In short, everyone should read
proof on his own eulogy and epitaph.
Who could improve on Piron's sar-
castle epitaph, which he wrote him
self: eve translate roughly):
Here lies Piron, who was nothing,
Not even a Member of the
Academy"
And Stevenson's exquisite:
Under the wide and starry sky
Dig my grave and let me lie,
Glad did I live and gladly die
And 1 lay me down with a will;
These be the words you grave for
me.
And the hunter home from the
hill.
Here ne lies where he longed to be;
Home is the sailor, home from the
sea,
To sum: A eulogy is what other
people write for you, a mylogy is
what you write for yourself Event
ually. why not now? Roll your own.
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1921-04-29
The Tower of Babel
BY BILL ARMSTRONG

crors out. regardless OF who Is The
perpetrator OF the same.
IF YOU HAD II MORE KIDS. YOU
MIGHT GO INTO VAUDEVILLE
AND PLAY "HEINZ'S 81
PICKLES"
South Bend, Ind.
April 27th, 1921.
Tower Of Babel,
City.
Dear Bill:
I am looking for some good
business 10 put my children in,
as soon as they grow up. What
would you suggest?
Say II With Flowers,
ADAM BEEHLER.
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1921-04-29
JUST FOLKS
BY EDGAR A. GUEST
PEANUT SHELLS.

PEANUT SHELLS.
Some may ride in limousines and
some in fine sedans,
But let me have the common car
which is the happy mans,
The car which once was new and
fine. but now is new no more,
The good old car with peanut shells
forever on the floor
I do not hunger for a rig which costs
so very much,
I want no polished body which the
children must not touch;
I like to see the sticky prints en-
blazoned on the door.
And see the last rides peanut shells
still strewn upon the floor.
Oh. let me have the popcorn car,
with candy papers, too.
And I'll not envy him at al whose
bus is ever new;
Though I would be a tidy man.
somehow when day is Ger
It's good TO put the car away with
shells upon the floor.
It's good to have a battered car TO
drive along the street,
A car which shows to every eye the
marks Of little feet,
It's good to have a happy car. with
gladness running DER,
And there's no richer sign Of JOY
than shells upon the floor.
Copyright, 1929
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1921-04-29

About the only exciting thing
that's happened around town In the
past "a hours that we know OF IS
Dave Fishgrund stopping his ma
chine in front OF Garland's 10 sea
how Toms anniversary sale was go
Ing, and claiming that he was
forced 10 STOP there because he had
run out OF gas.
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1921-04-29
FIRE

LIQUID fire 20 the bedbugs. ants,
reaches and fleas IS what the new chemi-
cal discovery really is. although there
is no danger or no damage 10 be done
by using IL 70 your springs, furniture
or clothing This new chemical IS known
as Pesky Devils Quietus, L. d. . Costs
35c but this few cents viii have the
power Of Kidding your house Of bedbugs
ants. reaches and fleas II you purchase
i. d. .. Z. u. Q. Is used and rec
Ommended by the leading Hospitals and
Railroad Companies as the safest and
quickest way Of Kidding the pesky bed
bugs. ants. reaches.
Special Hospital size S2.JO-makes five
Callons-yOur druggist has IL or can
procure IL for you OF sent prepaid
either size 20 your address on receipt
O.. price by the Owl Chemical Co. Terre
Haute. Ind. The success OF Z. d. ..
has caused imitatOrs 10 have been pros
ecuted. peddling an imitation. Genuine
4. ID. .. Is never peddled.
Sold by American drug store, Central
drug store South Bend: Red Cross phar-
macy, Mishawaka; Opera Frumas drug
store, Elkhart Ind. Adv.
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1921-04-29

An east side man stabbed his wife
three or four times the other day
during a family quarrel. The news
paper stated that the wife was very
much surprised over the attack.
It's funny how little thing like that
would occasion a woman 10 any
more than lift an eyebrow.
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1921-04-29

Frank Thorpe, who has been with
the Goodrich Rubber company ever
since Doc Goodrich quit the spra-
gettf business and started making
auto tires, is abroad in a new Essex
roadster The car was purchased on
the confidential credit plan.
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1921-04-29

The most important meeting OF
milk producers ever held in St. Jo-
seph county viii be held in the su-
perior court room al the court house
Saturday afternoon. April so. at .
O'Clock. This means you. Notify your
neighbor and get him 70 come.
S561-S0-Advt.
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1921-04-29
Significant

The post office clerks are wonder
ing If they are going 20 benefn by
the coincidence that Hays rhymes
with raise"
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1921-04-29

A prospect was seen to run and
lump in a manhole yesterday p. m.
downtown. when he observed A. s.
Burkart bearing down on him for
a fast canvass.
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1921-04-29
But II Hasn't

We have been watching the pa
pers TO see If the reduction by the
United States Steel Corporation was
going 70 make safety razor blades
cost less than radium.
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1921-04-29
CONDENSATION.

The Devil sends the blessed winds
That blow the knee-slirts high
But God is just and sends the dust
To blind the wicked eye.
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1921-04-29

George Platner, the venerable to-
bacco dealer, reports that he has
had TO put on another clerk TO take
care Of the business he got out OF
John Zuver's editorial the other
day.
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1921-04-29

Fred Loughman SEE he's always
afraid OF an undertaken chair be-
cause he hasn't did any gymnasium
work in years.
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1921-04-29

Be sure you are right. then go
ahead, even If the neighbors are
watching you from behind the cur
tains.
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1921-04-29

Some people are so two-faced
they ought TO enjoy riding on a
train as they can look out OF botn
windows at once.
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1921-04-29

At the Kiwanis luncheon the other
day, Rev. A. NJ. Eells was telling his
companion that he got the habit Of
exchanging cigars with other trav-
cling men when he was on the road
years ago. Hew to the line, let the
Quips fall where they may. Our
policy is TO expose sin wherever It
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1921-04-29
NOTICE.

Modern Woodmen and Royal
Neighbors. Family night Friday
evening at hall Of COlfax Camp.
8562-29.
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1921-04-29

ATTENTION FARMERS,

Anyway. we ought 10 make Greece
come across with what she owes US
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1921-04-29

Some Of these days the reformer5
are going to propose that Wayne
Wheeler be made fun censor of the
United States.
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1921-04-29

They say the Gays are longer at
Zion City. Ill, but maybe they just
seem longer.
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1921-04-29
REFERRED To DOC FREEZER
MUTH.

wash. School Hatchet)
In England they have parks that
it takes six weeks to go through
Ha, that's nothing. we've got al
leys in South Bend that the health
officers never go through.
ELEANOR WITUCKA.
The watchman and southron. [volume] (Sumter, S.C.) 1881-1930, 1921-05-18
MEXICO STARTS
RELIGIOUS VAR
Fifty Persons Killed il,
Clash Between Radi-
Gals and Catholics
at MOrelia

Mexico City. May 1S-Iifty persons
were killed, and score wounded last
night in Morelia, capital of the State
of Aichoacan. according to the news
paper Excelsior, when the police. aid
ed by unsolicited help from Radicals,
charged upon large group OF Catho-
lies, who were much incenscd Sunday
when Radicals entered E1urches.
broke images and eventually raised
red flag on the Cathedral. a demon
stration Of protest which followed
yesterday was broken up by the po-
lice, added by federal soldiers.
The demonstration was renewed
during the evening and when the
crowd refused to disperse the police
fired over their heads. This being
ineffective, a volley was fired into the
crowd. Intense bitterness is being
manifested against the police chief.
The watchman and southron. [volume] (Sumter, S.C.) 1881-1930, 1921-05-18
Wateree Bridge
Soon Under Way
Construction Foreman for Hard
away Company in Columbia
Saturday-To Bring
Equipment

Columbia. May 15.-E. +. IEarda-
VA. j.. of Hardaway Construction
company who viii have charge oI the
forces h;lilinS the Wateree bridge.
vas here stcrtiay and announced
til:it actual Work on the structure
Wil begin within Il few more DAYS.
FarccS to bring ;he equipment here
from th" biz water power plan; Just
on The W2terce river above
ramden viii be under construction at
Camden Wednesday. Mr. lIardaway
said.
The equipment will be brought
down the si:rcam 10 Gamers ferry
and only short tiluc vii! clapsc un-
iii the bridge viii be 1Indcr WAY. iWc
viii :iavc aH overhead galloway
across he stre:;n for the tGan&porta-
tion of material" Mi.. Hartlaway said.
Grani:e from Wa;ercc Mil be used
and also lo"al sand. we Will Use
about four gangs IT vorkmen With
10 OF II msn 10 The gang, the fore
man said M IIerdaway expects to
comp.;c the iob this summer.
The watchman and southron. [volume] (Sumter, S.C.) 1881-1930, 1921-05-18
STATE UNDERTAKES
ASSOCIATION

Columbia. May 1.-THE 5ta;c con-
vcntion OF the associuJis" OF cmb;tln-
ers and undcrtakcrs Vii open in Co.
luinbia Tuesday. 10 continue through
Thursday. This is The twcnty-,hird
ccNvention of this association.
I.of. Chas. O. Dhonau. prcSid"n
Of the Cincinnati College of En-
balninS. is 10 be the Chief speaker.
Others speakers are Senator Z. l..
Pearce. OF Columbia: y " Lump
kin. lawyer Of Colunl:a: IL J.: Ell
lis. OF GIacn"ood: G. X. Chrci:zbcrS.
OF Rock ilil; Geo. &. Jones. .At:antD:
a. &. Connolly. Charleston: j. s An
dreWs. G;r"enwo0d: james NJ: iiistcT
Charleston and Austin Breed. Gin
cinnati. Mr.. Connellcl is president uf
the association. J. 5. Andrews. Of
Greenwood, is secretary and treas
urer. Committee Chairmrn are J. NJ
VanMeter. Columbia. executive: w
NJ Waters. Florence. constitution:
Thos. +. McAfce. Greenvi!le. member
ship: +. y. Leavell, Newberry. griev-
ance; J. w. Mccormick. Columbia,
legislative.
The watchman and southron. [volume] (Sumter, S.C.) 1881-1930, 1921-05-18
The Mountain War
YoIIeys Poured into Merr.mac
After Day of Quiet

Williamson. ". III, May ID y
haiI hour of shooting at Mcrrim%>.
w Va. was The extent of nostiilsics
in the West Virginia -kentuck: bcr-
der battle tonight. according to Capt.
j. Il; Broc!iuS OF the state police. who
returned from the zone ot operations
shortly before midnight .Nt"r cx-
allininS reports from The AtinSo r.
2ion. the captain said that Ut that
hour The situation was quiet.
Captain i;rVckus and q squad OF
state troopers left Williamson for
Mcrrimac carly tonight when it was
reported that shooting from the Ken
lucky side opposite that village had
been resumed. Before they reached
Mr.;i,nac, however. thcy were ad-
v;scd lhe firing had ceased and re-
turned 10 his city.
Sheriff +. G. pcnson said his r.
ports indicated that III" shots from
inc kentucky side had bean answered
Y rii!cncn on Tie West Virginia
.;tlc. Whi:c the ""st Virginia troop
crs rctu'ncd to headquarters here.
SIX deputies continued theil. trip into
The mountains in an cndcaror 10 cap
"a those firing into MerriIuac.
The watchman and southron. [volume] (Sumter, S.C.) 1881-1930, 1921-05-18
Fight Between
Express Co,npa
American Railway Express
pany Requests Railroad Coz
n,issica to Rescind Order

Columbia May 1.-THE -American4
Railway Express Company has re-
quested the South Carolina Railroad
to ar!.lll its recent order
requiring the two express companies
20 handle freight for each other. so
that express shipments can be ilandl-
cd over I'll. shortest route between
points served BY beth companies. The
has set June l as date for
u hearing in the matter. the Anleri-
can company having requested
hearing.
The American company inserted
clause III its tariff. following the for
nation of the rev Southeastern
company. to the effect that freight
must be handled. between points
served by both companies. entirely
yer the lines OF the company receiv-
ing the freight The railroad COM
mission took the position that III
many cases this would nccessitate
long, roundabout Journey. and so an
order Vas issued len days ago, re-
curing the companies to use the,
shortest routing between two points
reached by both companies. and TO
charge a through rate. The Aneri-
can company has complied with the
temporary order, but has asked that
It be annulled.
The outcome Of the situation will
depend on testimony taken at the
June l hearing.
The watchman and southron. [volume] (Sumter, S.C.) 1881-1930, 1921-05-18
Wheat Acreage
Decreased
Department Of Agriculture Gives
Survey in Which Crop is Said
to Be Promising

Washington. May 15.-Winter wheat
acreage for III" Il countries in the
northern hemisphere growing the
crop was placed AT 99.4o". 900 acres as
compared WIKI 1"3.2ao.ooo last Year.
in u survey issued today by the de
partn1ent OF agriculture. Agricul-
;ural prospects of winter crops
;hrought toe northern hemisphere
we're described as quite satisfac-
Tory The spring crops, the survey
stated. remain as yet an unknown
factor. although soil and climatic
conditions have SO far been favorable
FOR seeding.
The corn crop of the Argentina is
estimated at 23i:.433.oG0 bushels or 50
per cent Of last ;ear's productions.
Discussing farming conditions in tn"
::;ou: ile.n hemisphere further, the
department report asserted that there
were indications Of large area be-
ing seeded 10 winter w3eat III AUS
traiia
The watchman and southron. [volume] (Sumter, S.C.) 1881-1930, 1921-05-18
PAPER BRINGS SUIT
New York Globe Sues Interna-
tional Paper Company

Kew York. May 1.-THE CONNER
cj.l Advertisers association, publish
ers OF the New York Globe, an after
noon newspaper, brought sEit here
IN federal court TO-DAY for S50o,o00
damages under the Clayton act
against the international Paper COM
pany and Philip y. Dodge and George
F. Steele, as individuals, alleging un-
lawful conspiracy in restraint OF
trade during 1915, 1916. and 1911.
The complaint charges that the
Newsprint Manufacturers assocja :
ton. formed prior TO April Is, 1915.
and operated until late IN 1917. and
with which Mr.. Dodge and Mr.. steele
were affiliated, dominated the trade
in neWsprint during the period Dnnlcd
and because OF this alleged CON
Sp'rGcy. III. complaints adds. tho C;!ohe
vas: unable to procure paper from
any other producer than tn" lnter-
national Paper company. The l:wS-
paper required from 5000 TO 1000
tous OF ncwsprint annually.