The Washington times., 1921-02-04

should be.
-And. now. gentlemen and ladies.
the combat viii begin. and the nrst
participant will be a gentleman who.
quite appropriately. comes from the
corn-growing and eorn-feedinE State
OF kansAs-Hoaorabis J. N. Tincher."
Congressman Tincher spent one
week searching the Congressional LII
brsry for points for his argument. but
failed. II. o. Bishop. one of the Ma
tionai Press Clubs fsttest members.
came TO his relief. Here's Mr.. rinch-
ers story:
have had four thousand suSges-
tons made TO me In the last ten days
or TWO weeks about q point that
would absolutely settle this debate.
because 1 think that IL IL important
that we should win. The most impor-
tant or conclusive suggestion I have
had came from 4 man named Bishop.
built on the style of Winslow and my
ssif' 4 member Of the press and 4
member OF the Press Club. He told
me that In the Book of Deuteronomy
would ind \ passage of Scripture,
stating directly. Blessed be the fat
man. for he shall enter the Kingdom
of Heaven.
MOSES ID NO BISHOP.
Assuming that distinguished gem
tleman knew what he was talking
ABOUT went along easy. even In the
absence OF all literature on the sub
ject from the Congressional Library,
thinking that that would not handi-
cap me, and that i would get the
book. bring II here and read that pas
sage or scripture. But. 10 and behold,
an examination OF the Book OF Deu-
teronomy disclosed the fact that that
scripture 10 not there. 80 the question
arises as to who Is right. Bishop or
Moses. Moses wrote the book. or
course. II has been transcribed many
times. But / have every confidence In
m friend Bishop. lie believe that
there is a mistake in the book. and /
propose. this afternoon, so that there
can be no question about the result
OF this debate. to take the steps neces-
sary to settle this great question for
all time.
II therefore. Mr.. Speaker. move to
strike out OF page POI, chapter 7.
which now reads
"'Thou shalt haze no other oods be-
fore me"
to strike out those words and sub
stitute In their place
"'BIessed Is the fat man, for he shall
be IN the Kingdom Of Heaven"
Uaughter.)
"And on this question / NOW the
previous question. Those in favor
Will say AYE" (Mr. Winslow and Mr..
Tincher voted aye.) The "ayes" have
II.
REGIMENT OF TAILORs.
''rhe question now arises on the
adoption of the amendment. All IN
In
Mr.. Tincher voted Aye.) The ayes
have 1t. and the amendment Is
dopted.
"The theory Of Bishop prevails. the
writings of Moses are corrected, and
we now have as our authority no less
than the great Good Book, which is
placed in every hotel room.
"This is as 1t should be. I can
prove by the actuary of any insur-
ance department in the world that the
fat men are closer to Heaven than
the lean men.
'Now. hope that you folks will
not lose sight of the Importance Of
this question. I will admit that there
are some Inconvenience about being
fat ! will admit that IL we are
going. say, to a masquerade ball. my
distinguished colleague in this debate
and purchase a few bolts of dry
goods. that he would have to as
semble a regiment OF tailors and have
himself dressed in such a way as to
represent q battle ship or something
of that kind so as to disguise himself
(laughter). l admit there Is that
which Is sometimes unhappy and II Is
impossible to get out and get under.
On the other hand. my distinguished
friend from Mississippi, the Senator.
IL he were invited to that masquerade
ball could step out and borrow a bed
sheet and chalk his head a little and
go to the ball as billiard cue
(laughter). So, there are some ad-
vantages and some disadvantages in
this subject"
Senator Pat Harrison, who opened
for the negative, said, in part:
II am sure Of one thing-that out
side of Barnun and Bailey's side
show the committee could not have
discovered two more perfect speci-
mems a living examples to represent
the affirmative side Of this question
than is to be found in Exhibits ! and
2. and hampered, Senator Ashurst, as
we are by having a stacked commit
tee to decide this question, we nave
got to appeal to the good common
sense and fairness and Judgment of
this audience and try to drive away
the feeling of partiality and favorit-
ism that naturally would arise in the
hearts of any one for subjects who
are so graceful in figure and perfect
in form as are our two antagonists.
This is an important question, i'm
portant since the morning stars first
sang together and the angel with
flaming sword stood guard at the
gates of desecrated Eden. In every
part of the globe and by all people
1t has received great consideration.
Captains Of industry, stenograph-
ers, manufacturers Of automobiles
and carriages, the common carriers
and trolley systems, all have to study
this great question in order to ar
rive at the capacity Of their particu-
lar manufactured article. Why,
kings and queens, princes and prin-
cesses, statesmen, speakers OF the
House and sages have all studied 1t.
But I am glad we are going to decide
1t this afternoon.
OLD FAT sTANDPATvTERS.