The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1921-05-03
A se-mNUTE POME.

A so.nNUTE POME.
ia ike to write some clever lines today;
know that you're expecting 1t OF me
(At least SOME do though why cannot say).
But time alas, tells me 1t cannot be.
No matter how pant and pun and strive.
II can't he done. IT'S now three ifty-ive
And l must meet the wife at four fifteen.
Deep In the misty past Ia hke 70 oeNe
And write an ode to some Egyptian maid
But that ambition shall have to shelve
And call upon mere words to be my aid.
Today the ripping rimes dare not weave
Those lines that you (perhaps) appreciate
Because twill soon be time for me to leave
And meet the wife-and MUST not BE- late!
10 Time! why do you flee so bloomin' fast!
why don't you give . harried bard a chance3
(But let US pray that all this speed will last
Else bang! will 60 this colyumist's romance!)
| o Time! I'm glad that l am nearly done,
That l have but to write two short lines
NV gosh. excuse me, folks, I've got to run;
! The clock says fifteen minutes after four!
THE foregoing may not be worth foot
note. Still, it may interest you 10 know that
20 minutes really was the time consumed in
composition. What interests us is the fact that
we were only 10 minutes late in keeping the
all-important appointment
DON'T MIND THIS BIRD, BROTHER. HE
| HAS A MEAN DISPOSITION.
| Sir: Cast your bread upon the waters
Already the contribution l cast upon the
waters of the Mississippi via The Tombstone
has returned from Quincy, bringing. appropri-
ately enough, the offer Of a bathrobe tied to it
In making the offer my friend Mr.. MARQUES
MAC, don't drop that final IS" or you'll spoil
his whole day. boasts: Just to stimulate in
iterest we'll give as our prize our model 1872
lbathrobe with one good elbow in the left sleeve,
to anyone who will convince US that anything
good worn out or otherwise ever came down
1.-The Father of Waters from Rock Island" For
a 9-year-old bathrobe still to retain perfectly
good elbow would, under ordinary circum-
stances, cause US to question the owners clean
Illness But when the owner is newspaper
man, and a Quincy newspaper man at that
perish the thought. Following the brick which
the waitress first whitfield at J. Hams wniskers
iMr. Marauss hands you this. Mac: AT that
. we've always considered The Tombstone some
thing OF a misnomer. It's far from being dead.
Apparently the gentleman from Quincy nuns
! the big idea which causes me to elucidate FOL
E his particular edifcation: Tombstone does
not die, old top; it's the thing. y'know, thai
goes over the dead ones. With quotes, yor
> can't muff this. -ETEOCLES.
: A FEMININE genius in New York conducts
: a shop where cats, canar1es and other pets ar
:, dyed to harmonic with milady's boudoir slip
Il pers. Heaven help the husbands Of New York
g FRINsTANCE: What shade is your hus
!. band, dearie? Green and gold-now; but w
had the drawing room redecorated and nov
: my dear, simply must have him done over il
It Mrs. Harding blue"
THE ANCIENT QUERY.
There are some things that puzzle me;
For instance, l would know
Why wOman's skirts are cut so high,
Her corsage cut SO low.
n, Another thing I've wondered at
a I'm waiting to be told
Why she wears furs in summer and
A. Goes bare-necked in the cold!
N Why woman's dresses are so tight,
Her boot heels are so small;
=; Why on the side of each fair face
- There sprouts hairy ball? -.
Tut tut! Since Mother Eve first hung
es An apron round her neck
or No maid has worn thing that man
- Can understand, by HEX! ID.
hot