davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Perth Amboy evening news., 1921-05-17
Giddap!

The Running Board said: '"When / nix
get up lots of steam;
I'm not a slow-poke plodder like
The doggone Walking Beam"
Perth Amboy evening news., 1921-05-17
Songs of Other DAYS.

Drunk Last Night, Drunk the Night Before!'
1--WE Won't Go Home Till Morning."
"Oh, Fill EN- Up, Bartender"
Don't Bury Me At ALL"
Joe Bowers He Said That His Father Was
Dead"
Here's to Good Old Lager. Drink Her
Down."
For It's Always Fair Weather."
Perth Amboy evening news., 1921-05-17

Have you noticed how hard it is to be pessi-
mistic on a nice warm, sunny, spring morning ?
Perth Amboy evening news., 1921-05-17

After the allied representatives met Lloyd
Georges home, "Chequers." it was to be expected
they'd tell DIR. Simons: IT'S your move."
Perth Amboy evening news., 1921-05-17
MORE QUESTIONS EDISON MIGHT ASK

Or, Mr.. Edison, you might ask young college
grads these questions. which-sooner or later
they must learn to face nightly as their eager
feet again enter the home portal!
Did you order the coal?
Where were you when I telephoned your Of
flee and they said you were out?
Have you mailed that letter. gave you this
morning.
How did these burlesque theatre ticket stubs
get in your pocket?
Did you go to the dentists?
Why don't you buy more than one collar
button?
How could you dance with that awful cat?
You know I despise her!
Who is this Babe Ruth" person you just
made a date to go and see?
Why don't you buy a new hat? Haven't
you any regard at all for how you look?
Where do you get the idea you can roll home
for dinner any old time and find it steaming
hot?
Quick, satisfactory answers to those ques-
lions, Mr.. Edison, will qualify any man for a
life degree Cor SENTENCE of B. D.-Bachelor
Of Domesticity.
The City of Happiness Is in the State of
Mind.
Biologically speaking. the least important
flies are easiest to swat.
After tho allied epreSeptafiye mot How'd
Perth Amboy evening news., 1921-05-17
Commence.

Although it makes the losers frown
To sip the cup;
Old Germany must settle down,
And settle up.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1921-05-17
Are You Abel to Stand This

why are you always raising Cain?' aske
the Angry Father.
II suppose it is the old Adam in me tina
makes me do it." replied the Penitent Son.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1921-05-17

We are gonna get up an excursion ana I'd
. trin TO Joplin. Mo-, to see Fred Battle
Thirteenth street and Schifferdecker aVenu
Perth Amboy evening news., 1921-05-17
Yes. But How Old Is the Dog.

Cad. in Greensboro, KY, 1nquirer.)
LOST-Airdale pup with brown spots seve
weeks old.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1921-05-17

PERTH AMBOY EVENING NEV
BITS OF BYPLAY
BY Luke McLuke.
Copyright. 1920. by The Cincinnati Enquirer.
Strange!
One funny thing about a man
Is this, that he will have to own,
He'll do more for your sister than
He'd think of doing for his own.
The Wise Fool.
Money gets a man into a lot of trouble
yes" replied the Fool. And it gets him
out Of a lot of trouble"
Horriblei
He had a dream, an awful dream, b
1t almost killed poor kellar;
And watched the Volstead hooch hounds take
The booze out of his cellar.
Then 1t Happened!
II wonder If you could?" unused the Cheer
full Idiot. $500
why, if a baker had a bakeshop on a corner,
I wonder if you could call him a corner LOAF
er 2" replied the Cheerful Idiot.
Giddap!
The Running Board said: '"When / hike
/ get up lots of steam;
I'm not a slow-poke plodder like
The doggone Walking Beam
Are You Abel to Stand This One!
why are you always raising Cain?' asked
Il suppose it is the old Adam in me that
makes me do It," replied the Penitent Son.
Drunk Last Night, Drunk the Night Before!"
we Won't Go Home TIL Morning.
Don't Bury Me < Ali"
Joe Bowers He Said That His Father Was
Dead"
Here's to Good Old Lager. Drink Her
FOR It's Always Fair Weather."
Commences!
Although it makes the losers frown
To sip the cup;
Old Germany must settle down,
And settle up.
Let's Go!
We are gonna get up an excursion ana take
a trim to Joplin, Mo, to see Fred Battle at
thirteenth street and Schiferdecker avenue.
Yes. But How Old Is the Dog?
Cad. in Greensboro, Ky, Inquirer.)
OST-Aird pup with brown spots seven
weeks old.
Fan Food.
Dear Luke: If a ballplayer stole home about
A. A. M. would his wife bawl him out and call
him a base deceiver? e.
And, judging by the attendance at the 81.
Louis National League Park, the Hornsby az
it6htioh
are t~hey?-Billie Wood.
Alta Boy!
You NAV not believe it, but Otaker lesaf,
pronounces his name as he spells II, lshl
a bit like his alarming title. He is a harmless
business man who sells c~omptometers and
thinks IN figures, not OF them. You'll nno
him in the Republic Building, Louisville, Ky.
Ho, Hum!
The saddest words,
Alas! Alack!
Are these: Gimme
Another stack."-Holyoke.
We find the following advertisement IN al
program issued for a playlet given by local
talent in Springfield, Ohio:
Special inducements
For |
Immediate Sales.
Spring styles Just Out.
The Springfield Coffin and Casket Company
Firms Is Firms. -.
Sounds like a convention of fiyyers, doesn't
it? What does? Why Tinker & Hooten run a
garage in Versailles, Ind.
Mercy!
Tramp Starr informs us that you can call
Kate Katie" and you can call Maud "Maudle,
comes to Belle, you'll have to stop right there.
Things to Worry About.
1t costs the government 50 to print a thou
sand $1,000 bills.
Our Daily Special
Variety is Also the Spice of Love.
Luke McLuke Says
Any time a man asks you for your Honest
Opinion about himself, he means that he wants
a mess OF Salve.
What has become of the old fossil who used
Perth Amboy evening news., 1921-05-17
Fan Food,

Dear Luke: If a ballplayer stole nome apou,
4 A.. M. would his wife bawl him out and cal
him a base deceiver? :.
And, judging by the attendance at the ot
Touis National League Park, the Hornsby ag-
gregation are not very good drawing CARDS.
are t~hey?-Billie Wood.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1921-05-17

Biologically speaking. the least important
flies are easiest to swat.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1921-05-17
Alta BOX!

You may not believe it, but Otaker lesar
who pronounces his name as he spells II, ism
a bit like his alarming title. He is a harmless
business man who sells comptometers ano
thinks IN figures, not OF them. you'll INC
him in the Republic Building, Louisville, KY.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1921-05-17

We find the following advertisement in a
program issued for a playlet given by local
talent in Springfield, Ohio:
Special inducements
For
Immediate Sales!
Spring styles Just Out!
The Springfield Coffin and Casket Company
Perth Amboy evening news., 1921-05-17

The City of Happiness is in the State of
Mind.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1921-05-17

Ho, Hum!
The saddest words,
Alas! Alack!
Are these: Gimme
Another stack."-Holyoke.
The Mt. Sterling advocate., 1921-06-23

by the army and navy TO test the
ability Of naval vessels to withstand
damage inflicted from the air.
The bomb that settled the fate Of
the U-117 was one Of a salvo Of nine
dropped from three planes that con-
stituted the first and only aerial di-
vision to engage in the actual work.
A few minutes before the fatal salvo
was fired the same division had
dropped three bombs to get the ac-
curate range.
The projectiles we're hurled from a
height Of about 1,100 feet, while the
planes were making more than 100
miles an hour. It<was only six min
utes after the second salvo was
launched that the D-117 made its
The Mt. Sterling advocate., 1921-06-23
CONSCIENCE STRICKEN

A man who was afraid Of thunder
Srawled into a hollow log as a place
of safety during a thunder storm.
The, thunder rolled and the rain
potNed down in torrents and the old
log began to swell up until the poor
felloxs was wedged in SO tight that he
codi8 not get out. All his past sins
began passing before him. Suddenly
he remembered he hadn't paid his
newspaper subscription, and he felt
so small that he was able to back
right out.-Na. Center Advocate).
The Mt. Sterling advocate., 1921-06-23

naval and marine planes and later
attack by twenty-three army ma
chimes IL the naval craft failed to
sink the submarine. Nearly 200
bombs we're provided for the affair,
but only twelve were used, and Of
the forty-seven aircraft scheduled
to take part in the bombing, but three
obtained a shot at the target, while
three more we're robbed Of their only
chance after reaching the scene by
the effective work Of the first di-
vision.
Just after the submarine was sunk
Lieutenant Colonel Culver, flying an
army plane, crashed down near the
Henderson. He and his assistants
were rescued by naval boats.
The Mt. Sterling advocate., 1921-06-23
Bomb Sends U-Boat
to Bottom Of Atlantic

On Board the U. s. s. Henderson,
off Cape Charles, Va, June 21-By
Associated Press) Within sixteen
minutes after the first division Of
naval seaplanes had attacked the
former German submarine U-117 to-
day the submersible was resting on
the bottom Of the Atlantic, so miles
from the Virginia Capes. A direct
hit with q 163-pound bomb did the
work Only three naval planes had a
chance to attack.
The direct hit abruptly terminated
the first Of series Of experiments
The Mt. Sterling advocate., 1921-06-23
CARD OF THANKS

We employ this means of express
ing our gratitude to friends, neigh
bors and relatives for their many
kindneASs shown during the sick
ness and death of our father, An
drew ]. Garrett, who entered on his
reward June 5th, after having been
sick for more than six months.
Very respectfully,
~ -aN THE CHILDREN.
The Mt. Sterling advocate., 1921-06-23

last acrssh divev 10 find a resting
place fifty fathoms deep.
The sinking in so short time
came as a surprise TO most of the
army and navy officers who witness
ed the experiment, many Of whom
had been frankly skeptical regarding
the ability Of the planes to even hit
the submarine, regardless of the fact
that all the conditions favored the
attacking force and no effort was
made to simulate real war action.
The U-117 was securely anchored
and the bombing planes were fur
nished with charts showing the ex-
act position Of the target.
The plans for the first test called
for participation of twenty-four
The Mt. Sterling advocate., 1921-06-23
HOW TO HANDLE YOUR COMPETITOR


This subject we'll unsonrovby by Crane
Modest bat master mind in the
ha( we reproduce it ID the Advocate DR. Crane says
It is mistake suppose that you fight your competitor
Nothing permanently gained by fighting fighting
knd obstruction Your competitor
He be friend Competition
and makes trade This based
person suit everybody No all possible business
eomnAty His personality
there lot of
Tho by the that
line together We find
Most of the automobile strung
section the The
eacA have their district This practical working
business locate the neghborhood competitors
that there
trade good lively competitor will grocers
grocer good valuable competitor poor
the provb and where eagles hover there is slim picking Don't
r competitor sounds bad and is bad Be good Play
Keep good your competitor you
that beat him to sell better goods
have working people Don't fight by cutting
pcXs your margin profits
underhanded methods to harm don't He cutting
his fool all the all the time
Straight
competitor of keep open
He will make energetic, careful
attentive business altogether will be good tonic for you
There business both
It'll influence keep
city, would do like business with him should ply this article"
The Mt. Sterling advocate., 1921-06-23
QUALIFICATIONS

An advertiser who was looking for
a post as companion put in the fore
front Of his accomplishments: "Good
pianist, plays golf, cards, etc" This
order of merit sounds like the actors
testimonials: 'Mr. So-and-So can
play Macbeth, Othello and Billiards.
He plays Billiards best"
The Mt. Sterling advocate., 1921-06-23
NOTICE

All persons having claims against
the estate of Claude P. Stephens will
present them, properly proven, to the
undersigned, or W. B. White, his at
tcrney.
(70-3t) John Gibbons, Agt. &c.
The Mt. Sterling advocate., 1921-06-23
THE REASON

"What does young Bjinks mean
by sending me one carnation a day,
right alongf"
''Why, don't you know2 He's say
ing it with flowers, and he shutters" I"
The Mt. Sterling advocate., 1921-06-23

Votes free on subscriptions.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1921-03-31
EASTER SERVICES At =. -.
9 THE AARDAHL. CHURCH

Easter Sunday was an interesting
day at the Aardahl church in FROM
Township. Despite the bitter wealth
er, there was fine attendance and
theSEaster program given by the chill.
dfen was very much enjoyed. ~
Pastor O.. P. Grambo preached the
sermon in the morning, taking for
his theme "Christ Is Risen for Our
Justification" and during the after
noon exercises gave an address,
"Christ, the Foundation Of All
Church Activities" These were great
" enjoyed by "a congregation.
T.. The Easter program was followed
by most interesting feature, the
taking over Of the FROM Union Sun
day school. ~. /
II The FROM Union Sunday school
was organized in the school house
east of Aardahl church last June by
Missionary w. S. Cummings of the
American Sunday School union and
since that time has served the COM
munity, there being no other Sunday
, school nearer than Rosby.
Miss Amanda Homme and Miss
Clara Nordbo have, with the assist
ance of other young pepole, made this
most useful organization. maintain
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1921-03-31
Mobility Of Health

Following is from Carlyle's Essay
on Sir. Walter Scott Health is Il
great matter, both to the possessor Of
1t and to others. On the whole that
humorist in the Moral Essay was
NOT so far out, who determined on
hGnoring health only; and so instead
OF humbling himself to the high-born,
to the rich and Well-dressed, insisted
on dofting his hat to the healthy, Cor
oneted carriages, with pale faces in
them, passed as failures, miserable
and lamentable !; trucks with ruddy-
checked strength dragging at them
We're greeted as successful and vener-
able. For does not health mean har-
mony, the synonym Of all that is true,
justly ordered, good; is it not, in some
sense, the net-total, as shown by ex-
pertinent Of whatever worth is in us?
The healthy man is the most merito-
rious product Of Nature, so far as he
goes" =
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1921-03-31
1 Value of Friendship,

Nothing that we experience in life
makes azdeeper appeal to us than the
loyalty Of our friends. in the hour Of
misfortune. Frequently we hear it
said that only in misfortune do we
know our real friends. There is no
doubt about this. Superficial friends
will not stand the acid test of adver-
sity. It is amazing what a tonic 10y.
atty is when life feels its stress. and
strain. 1t may not disclose itself in
any material way, for its, finest express
sions are quite apart from material
gifts. 1t is those who stand by us that
constitute our safeguards and are our
tunes cOme.-James e. Freeman.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1921-03-31

ing teacher training class and a
catechism class and sand tray work
for juniors as well as a week night
Bible study class. With the develop
ment of Sunday sa school interest
throughout the community and tn,
training of young people as Sunda.;
school teachers, it has become pos
sible for the Aardahl church to take
over this Sundays school. Sunday
afternoon it became the .Aardahl Free
Lutheran Sunday school with Mr.. A.
A. Haarklau as superintendent Mr.:
Carl Opsata as assistant superintendz
ent and corps Of teachers as: fol
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1921-03-31
Exclamation of Dreams.

Confusiye, fantastic dreams are a
mixup of recollections and partly real
izations of past physical and mental
experimentation, pain, happiness,
fear, etc. A~child will not have the
same dreams as a grown-up person,
because of the difference in each's real
ization and Installation. A person
born blind, deaf and dumb will not
have the same kind Of dreams, as a
perfect grown person.. Prophetic
dreams are received subconsciously
from the cosmic mind, either actual
rs the happening will be, or as the
dream picture is written in cosmic
language, which is in symbolism, as in
the Old Testament.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1921-03-31
MODELS

The new season s fashions offer some
charming novelties in taffeta frocks.
The first model pictured is in gray
taffeta trimmed with bands of black
ribbon with figures in Paisley colors.
The ribbon is stitched about the lower
edge Of the skirt front and over the
turn-back fronts of the blouse. Short
sleeves and a round neck-line add to the
youthful effect of the dress. Medium
size requires. S yards 36-inch taffeta,
withF2 Is yards ribbon. q .,u
x Charnleuse and taffeta are used to-
gether in the second model, the
clannish browns being featured. Three
deep aounees form the skirt, which is
attached to- a iong-waisted blouse with
short sleeves. Embroidery decorates
the edges Of the founces and reappears
on the sleeves, with cuffs that cores
pond with the skirt. Medium size re-
quires yards 36-inch charmeuse and
~ yards 36-inch staffeta. F."
First Model: Pictorial Review Dress
No. 9288. Sizes, 81 TO 4S inches bust.
Price, IS cents. III; B. =,
Second Model: Dress No. $3.50.
Sizes, "a to As inches bust. Price, IS
cents. Embroidery No. Gsl2464. Trans
fer, blue or yellow, rs cents. -.
~
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1921-03-31
BROWN-SWARTZ

Mrs. R. w. Kin gsbury of Crook
ston has received the announcement
of the marriage of her niece, Miss
Eva May Brown of Kramer, Sask..
on March 20, to: Alexander G..
Schwartz.
Mr.. and Mrs. Swartz left for the
Pacific coast on an extended trip, but
will be home to their friends May L,
at Prince Albert Sask., where Mr..
Swartz is engaged in the real estate
business.
The brides parents lived in Bemid-
il for a number Of years and were
engaged in the hotel business. Mr..
Brown was also one of the city alder
men for a number of years before
leaving for Canada.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1921-03-31
a. .. ~ ~, =
First American Train#Robbery.

Train robbery, pastiIne which was
for some years very popular in the
West, was inaugurated As years ago
at Verde, Nevada, when the Overland
express was held up and despoiled of
about $4,000. This robbery marked
a new departure in the field Of crime,
for previously only stage coaches and
travellers had fallen prey to holdup
men. When western outlaws are dis
cussed, the name Of Jesse James is
usually the first brought up, but he
was not the pioneer train robber.
That dubious distinction belongs to
one Buck Taylor, who, with four COM
panions, pulled off the train holdup
which was the first Of long string Of
similar crimes.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1921-03-31
..use Of .aEoIkr and nEolks.n

Folk is collective noun and is
used in the sense of either people or
peoples; as 1.-THE English are virtually
the same people or folk as the Dutch,
both belonging to the same division
the Low German of the Teutonic
branch of the Aryan family" Jose
phine Turck Baker. in 'The Correct
Word" holds the pluralizing Of folks
is good form. She says: "Folks is
used in the sense Of persons; as The
young folks of the church ; The poor
folks of the town. THE old folks at
home;' How are your folksT The
pluralizing of folks has been censured
by some authorities, but the criticism
is unwarrantable, folks used in the
sense OF persons being recorded as un.
Objectionable. City Star.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1921-03-31

lows: Andrew Anderson, George
Langerak, Clara ;Paulson and Thoren
Kvale... s54S : d: ~. ~ II.
A full equipment of the latest ma
terial for catechism instruction is
being secured and classes will be pro-.
vided for all in the community. Aar-
dahl now has a pastor, a young peo-
pies society and a Sunday school and
is prepared to do the best work for
all ages. .e: 8. s. !.
Gratitude was expressed for the
faithfulness and interest on the part
Of the Misses HommeE and ..Nordbos
and Missionary Cummings. aa.1 d. -.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1921-03-31
SURPRISE PARTY

Mrs. A. A. Andrews was surprised
Wednesday afternoon by few of her
friends, at her apartments in the
Kaplan building, the occasion being
her birth anniversary. The after
noon was pleasantly spent in social
way, and the self-invited guests serv-
ed a lunch. Mrs. Andrews was pre-
scented a bouquet Of flowers as a
birthday gift from the guests.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1921-03-31
EVANGELICAL LEAGUE TO
HOLD MEETING TONIGHT

The Young, Peoples League Of St.
Paul's Evangelical church will meet
at the home of Miss Myrtle Kobe,
'1'111- 'Doud avenue, at 1880 this eve
ming for its regular monthly business
session. All memb ers are asked to
be present. A social hour will be
held and lunch will be served follow
ing the business meeting.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1921-03-31
METHODIST AID DIVISION
r. HOLDS ENTHUSIASTIC MEET

The members Of the miscellaneous
division of the Ladies' Aid Of the
Methodist church of which Mrs. j. W..
Naugle is chairman held an enthusi-
astic meeting at the home Of Mrs. L..
B. Grandy Wednesday afternoon.
Keen interest was shown, and the
ladies are laying aside their own
work and filing special orders, a
large number of articles having al
ready been sold They will meet
again in two weeks at the home Of
Mrs. Earl Mcmahon, and are plan
ming on spending a day soon with a
member in the country. ~
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1921-03-31
BIRTHDAY PARTY

Mrs. D. r.. Burgess entertained
few friends of her mother, Mrs. J. B.
Bisiar, at her home, 615 Minnesota
avenue, Monday afternoon. it being
Mrs. Bisiar's birth anniversary. A
pleasant afternoon was spent in So
cial. way, and Mrs Burgess served a
birthday lunch.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1921-03-31
MRS M,GHEE SURPRISED

! About fifteen friends of Mrs. Given
McGhee went to her home 1241s
FBeltrami avenue, and surprised her
Wednesday afternoon. Mrs. McGhee
expects to leave soon for an extended
visit with her daughters on the
range. The afternoon was spent in
sewing and in a social way, and the
se1f-inYited guests served lunch.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1921-03-31
EASTERN STARS HOLD
F DC. SOCIAL, TOMORROW NIGHT

The Eastern Stars will hold an All
Fools Day masquerade party tomor-
row evening at the Masonic hall for
the young people Of the order and
their frien DIS. Comical costumes will;
be featurseof the affair. Music will
be furnished by Mrs. J. Williams,
and punch will be served. u. h @
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1921-03-31
Wanted Information,

Little David, four, had been I'M
usually naughty and his mother
threatened to put him to bed and
"spank him in the bargain" After a
moments thought David exclaimed,
'Mother, where's the bargain?"
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1921-03-31
IsCOPALlANS TO HOLD
" SUPPER FRIDAY EVENING

The Right Rev. Bennett, bishop
coadjutor of Minnesota and the new
Episcopal clergyman, Mr.. Elliott, will
arrive in the city Friday. A supper
and get-together meeting will be
held tomorrow evening at 6 o'clock
in the basement of St. Bartholomew S
church. All Episcopalians and 9TH
ers are cordially invited.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1921-03-31
WANTED JANIT0R

For new armory. Make bid and
application to manager Bemidji arm
DRY board and give references. Name
salary desired for full time and also
part time basis. The board reserves
the right to reject any or all bids:
1881
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1921-03-31
CAST OF ST. PATRICK'S
- DAY PLAY ENTERTAINED

Misses Pearl and Grace McLaugh-
lin entertained the members Of the
cast Of the St. Pa1tricks Day play at
their home. 8 II America avenue, last
evening at an informal dancing par
:ty. A very enjoyable evening was
spent by all, and refreshments We're
served by the hostesses. r.