The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1921-07-15

| the times are out of joint
only hurry home to eat
don't have any fun
can't go out and roam the street
| the coIyums never done
some day feel it coming on
i'm going on strike
some morning fine will find me gone
upon a carefree hike
i'll go to where the folks cant read
and therefore do not write
a little nerve is all need
and might start tonight
rig as you may recall said there was nc
punctuation in nature we shall go bit fur
Their tonight and say there is no punctuation
in i'll nature for we ill natured and that's
why we refuse to punctuate this colyum tonight
with the exception the compositor viii
please note of certain spaces between sen
fences which should as l used to say
adumbrate the idea we are getting at
there is as we have intimated in our un
punctuated stanzas a certain amount of energy
required in the insertion of periods commas
colons semi colons exclamation points inferno
cation marks hyphens and dashes and we shud-
der to think of the enormous amount OF weight
lifted each day by the average typist in holding
down the shift key for the making of capital
letters
this colyum tonight is the product of a
brain whose usually nitid outpourings have
been dried and withered by the intense heat
go 40
ity of our mentality still persists
don't want to throw cold water on you we
are quoting the lady who hates to darn our
socks though why she should not want to
throw cold water on one who so obviously needs
it is more than can fathom fathom by the
way brings to us a deep desire to be dropped
in water nine fathom deep but we are losing
the thread of our aragraph but continued the
lady your colyum of last n1ght shows that
your brain was not hitting all six are
struck by the fear that along with her tonsils
she lost a considerable portion of her hereto
fore sweet disposition still she is an honest
when she shall see this in print if she tells
us it is a punk colyum we shall seek a cozy
little nook in the mississippi and leave the
rest of the world behind
perhaps in printing clippings from oiher
journals today it were better that we conform
to the conventions in the matter of punctuation
and capitalization
Arthur! Arthur! Has the Stillman Affair
BIunted Your Sense of Delfcacyl
[Arthur Brisbane, in Today
Princess Fatima. here from Afghanis-
tan, with a valuable jewel in her nose, is
angered because Prince Mohammed, with
other long names, also from Afghanistan
doesn't call her and says he doesn't
know anything about her. Princess Fa-
TINA wants Mohammed to understand
that her family tree goes back to Alex
ander the Great and through him farther
back 1t is generally understood that
AleXanQerS 1amlly was WlpeQ out, LldnES
to female jealousy and misfortune. Bat
strange things may have happened IN
those early days.
and he will not be blamed we are quoting
our editorial colleague if he succeeds in max
ing example of some OF the holder visitors
from the city
dryden was too conservative when he wrote
shadows in painting make the figure holder
~Thou Art Clothed With Honor and Majesty"
[Galva Corr, Galesburg Republican Register
Galva has the honor of being repre-
scented in the Chicago Tribune on Tues
day of this week, when G. E. Banta's
picture appeared in the inquiring re-
porters column.
Mr. and Mrs. Banta were in the city
to spend the Fourth and while there Mr..
Banta was interviewed by the inquiring
reporter.
The question asked was: do you
think an Irish peace is in sight?" His
answer was: 81 think there will be some
kind of settlement although 1 do not
think peace will last long. 1 don't think
England will grant Ireland all it asks.
But they ought to settle it in some way
SO the fighting will stop"
the editor of the western illinois page who
OCCASIONALLY hands us quaint wheeze reports
call on the phone from a lady who expressed
olicitude for the condition of the argus re
orter who wrote the story of fire it seems |
hat the fire victim was a gentleman named I
S jake summers
mr. winter will we feel sure pardon our
over case handling of his honorable name /
re cannot consistently deviate from todays
olyum style !.
%, THE TUITION IS GRATIS. THEY
EARNS WHILE THEY LEARNS" i
Editor Tombstone: This is truly an age of L
pecialization. In your last issue I note the |,
blowing advertisement:
GRADUATED DISH DRYERS 4
Now, perhaps some of your contribs. can
IL US where the school, college or university |,
located that graduates this kind of desir-
Die dryers" |,
P. S. Dye suppose the tuition is "onrea-
,nable"? ANON II
upon reaching the Office yesterday morning
e received an awful blow the lady who brings Ii
70 morning mail Informed US that our proposaI Il
r the press club ladies to conduct the coIyurn L
T one day was fayorably received at their IL
onthly meeting tother night whereupon we &
niled gleefulfy but she added not until this
IL gosh right now is when we need a Ii
Ication Ii
one never can depend on women excla
ztions