The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1921-03-09

mat Ii WAFER Wu1u COlu.
INTERVIEWED by Tribune reporter at
the La Sale street station Mrs. Jake Hamon
declared the divine Clara had broken the sew
eltL commandment Speaking to the United
Press at Kansas City concerning Clara MIS-.
Hamon was willing to say without hesitancy
that Clara has broken every one OF the 10
commandments" What Mrs. Hamon will say
when she reaches the scene of the trial we
leave to your. imagination.
"A Deadly Cold Ran Shivering to Her Heart"
CTrom some paper unknown).
Miss Frances Louise Stevens, daugh-
ter of Mr. and Mrs Edmund H. Stevens
CT Kenilworth, became the bride OF Zero
Marx of Kenilworth on Feb. %. The
wedding took place in the kenilworth
assembly hall. After a honeymoon
spent in Jamaica Mr.. and Mrs. Marx |
will live in Evanston.
WHAT a cold outlook on life the poor girl
has," exclaims Bonner, who supplied the clip |
ping But" he adds, perhaps the genial ell
mate of Jamaica will raise his temperature"
WILL Bonner please indicate the name Of
the paper on any future offerings Of this sort
We are nothing if not meticuluous in giving
credit where credit belongs.
ACROSTIC TO A FAMOUS WORD.
Now is the winter of our discomfort
Our dark despair at hope so long deferred,
Reckoned in years, in months, IN days mis-
spent
Made glorious summer by one shining word.
| word that spells surcease from restlessness
Like unto that We have not known in years;
Controlled and guided by it we'll progress.
Ye gods! let's give this word three rouslng
cheers!
| A MILD curiosity has been aroused in US
as to what percentage of our readers passed
Az Iirr1 with
grasping the idea. We mildly curios be-
cause four persons have admitted to us they
muffed it. Now, an acrostic ls-but, no: we
shall not risk offending the cognoscenti by
any further remarks.
| In Which Ye Correspondent Coyets
| His Neighbours Chickens.
Bushnell Corr, Galesburg Republican,
Register).
Was in South Bushnell Friday after
noon to the home Of Harvey Hearsey and
found some of the best barred rocks
that l have seen for some time. and l
| think that it possibly may be that your
correspondent may take over the greater
part of his Barred Rock flock.
OF course you are interested in the marital
troubles of Ethel Barrymore-Mrs. Russell
lGriswold Colt? Well, they are nearly ended.
She has decided the Colts no longer can
ter together.
FURTHER ADVENTURES OF WILLIE GREEN
AMONG THE CHICKENS.
! Sir: was visiting at Friend Farmers the
other day and in looking over the place,
said: That's mighty fine COW" That's an
OK" sezze That's 4 big pig" sezzi. YES,
that's nice hog seize. "Oh amt those
pretty chickens" sezz That's rooster"
seize. We'll. what's that one?" sezzi That's
a hem" seize. Just then two young ladies
drove by Seize: Say, boy; talk about your
prize winning birds! There's the two SWEETEST
chickens in the state Of Illinois" &. . Can you
help me? WILLIE GREEN.
WILLIES adventures among the chickens
are hardly as thrilling as those of Joe Kiss
OF ST Louis, who bet Joe Koss $25 he could
eat four dozen doughnuts and two dozen eggs
in two hours. Mr.. Kiss slowed away the dough-
nuts and % eggs. then cracked the shell Of the
gath. A chicken stuck its head out and said
Kiss me, papa" Kiss declined but won his
bet by substituting a quart of milk for the
final egg
By adding pint Of brandy Kiss could have
transformed himself into an animated eggnog
In Other Words. Sport Is Undone.
(From The Sportscope)
The moment an athlete spectator
takes undo advantage of an opponent in
competition, sport becomes the sufferer
WHILE browsing around on the sport page
We also discovered story by Fried McCol-
lister" The compositor apparently desires to
make it hot for Frier.
Page Mr.. yolstead-Qu ick!
form letter received (probably) by The
American Issue. official organ of the Anti
Saloon league1
Circulation Manager
Dear Sir: l am taking advantage of
the fact that We are fellow-members Of
that great body OF brow beaten worry
hounds better known by the common or
garden name of circulation managers to
ask you for little favor
We want our paper on the news
stands in your city. Will you be kind
enough to write the name and address
of three or four such news stands on
the enclosed return postal card and drop
it in the outgoing mail box?
And sometime. when you're down
here in Texas on pleasure or business I'll
return this favor by introducing you to
the hes. bootlegger this side of the Red
river.
= | Many thanks for this favor. Any
thing We can do-you know!
Fraternally yours, etc.
Circulation Manager, Texas Oil Gazette
MARCH ON GERMANY" headlines the
Hearstaminer.
All. Fritz; beware the Ides of March!
HN R. e. MIG.