The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1921-12-06
ON SECOND THOUGHT
BY JAY e. HOUSE
tFrom Philadelphia Public Ledgerl
THE HAPPY HOME LIFE
Or, Why Men Go Downtown Nights
Domesticity in Three Acts.

DomeSticity in Three Acts.
SCENE-A Living Room
CHARACTERS Us.
Adelaide = There's something on
your mind.
Us-You Ae unusually compliment
airy, conceding, as you do. without
argument, that L have a mind and
that there is something on it.
Adelaide hate you when you're
like that; if there is one thing 1 can't
abide, it's a smart-alecky man.
Us-Fm sorry you feel that way
about it; l don't mean to be smart
alecky. But you don't really hate me.
I'm sure you exaggerate the antipathy
you feel toward me.
Adelaide don't suppose I really
hate you, but you are trying. 1 do
the best can. 1 buy the best food 1
can buy; try TO keep the house cheer
full and orderly. And you eat your
dinner. come in here and throw your
self down on a couch and never say
word. 1t is discouraging.
Us-Maybe 1 was a little distract, as
those who have studied French say.
The fact is 1 was trying to frame up
few bright, eXtemporaneous remarks.
have to make a talk tomorrow. l
find 1 get away better if I frame my
extemporaneous remarksain advance.
Adelaide-They ought to pay you
for making speeches,
Us-They ought TO what?
Adelaide-They ought to pay you.
Us-Have you ever heard me make
a speech?
Adelaide never have
U.s. thought not. When I make
a speech I ought to remunerate the
audience for listening.
Adelaide-Td write and tell them.
Us-What would you write and tell
them?
Adelaide-Td write and tell them
they must pay me something.
Us-Well, hate to make a speeeh;
probably that would be as good a way
as any to get out of it.
Adelaide did hear you make Il
speech once-the time the Belgians
We're in this country. I never was so
mortified in my life. I was so far
lack I couldn't hear a word you said,
but you would wear your Palm Beach
suit, and you kept hitching Up your
trousers al the time. Once vou let
the BelSlans holding the Germans at
L3ege while you hitched up yoUc trou-
sers; by the time you got bdcl. to the
fortress Liege had surren1er9i. You
practically lost the war for Belgium
right there. Everybody was Laughing
about it.
Us-Tm glad they enjoyed it; there
was nothing funnys about it to me.
Adelaide-What do you suppose
they are going to do in Washington?
Us-I haven't an idea; are they
planning to do something?
Adelaide-Don't be smart-aIecky
again. You know what I mean; I
mean the arms parley and China and
France and Great Britain. Do you
think they'll get the better of the
United States? Are they going to
leave France to the mercy of the Ger
mans again? A woman told me the
other day the Germans never were so
prosperous as they are now. They
ought to have invaded Germany. The
Germans don't know they were
whipped; they say they didn't lose the
war.
US know there is some sort of
party going on in Washington. but 1
haven't paid any attention to it.
Adelaide-Why, the papers are full
of it.
U.s. know they are, but 1 hardly
ever read the papers. Sometimes I
reod the Sporting page. I am curious to
know how hard Judge Lands is going
to oak Bake Ruth, so 1 turn over to
the sporting page nearly every day to
find out whether he has done it.
want to say Judge Lands either makes
himself or breaks himself with me on
that one decision. I can be for him
or against him, and it all depends on
what he does to the Babe.
i Adelaide haven't the remotest
idea what you are talking about. I
asked you what you thought of the
situation in Washington ana you ram
BILE off about something else. Do you
mean to tell me you nave read moth
ing about the Disarmament Confer
ence?
US haven't read anything about
it and I don't suppose l snail 1 did
try to read a little of this stuff by II.
G. Wells, because some of the fellows
claim he is a good writer But there
wasn't anything in it about a Confer
ence and, anyway, 1 couldn't stand
him. If he's a good writer, the edi-
tor of the De Soto Eagle is a genius.
Adelaide should be ashamed to
admit 1 knew nothing about what Is
going on at my country's capital.
Us-AIl right, you've read all about
it, you tell me what's going on. But