The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1921-01-01
Modern Rural
Sports

ftoptrt0hf. 1870. bu the Whrric'
Syndicate. fnoJ
jeff Peters must he reminded
Whenever he In called upon. point
eddy. for a story he viii maintain
that his life has been as devoid OF
incident ms the longest OF Troliope'i
novels. hut iured. he viii divulge
Therefore I cast many and divers
Tiles upon the current OF his
Thoughts before I feel a nibbie.
II notice" said I. that tho West
crn farmers. In spite Of their pros
lpcrity. are running after their old
populistic idols again"
It's the running season. said
jeff. "for farmers. shsd. maple trees
and the Connemaush river. know
something about farmers. l thought
! struck one once that had got on,
OF the rut, but Andy Tucker proved
To me was mistaken. Once a
farmer. always sucker said Andy
lies tho man that's showed into
the front row among bullets. ballots
and the ballet. He's the funny.bonc
and grirtie Of the country said
Andy. and don't know how we
would do without him.
"une morning mo and Andy wakes
up with es cents between US In a
yellow pine hotel on the edge Of
the pre- digestcd hoe cake belt Of
Southern Indiana. How we got off
the train there the night before I
can't tell YOU for she went thru
the village so fast that what looked
like a saloon 10 uH thru the car
window turned out 20 be a com.
ponite Wow OF drug store and n
water tank two blocks apart why
we got off at tho first station We
could, belongs TO a little oroide gold
watch and Alaska diamond deal We
failed 10 pun OFF the day before
over the Kentucky line.
when ! woke up I heard rooaterr
Growing. and smeit something like
the fumes OF niiro-mur,atic acid. and
heard something heavy fall on the
floor below us. and a man swear.
Ing.
Cheer up. endy.' says 7. We're
In a rural community Somebody
has Just tested a gold brick down
stairs. Wen 20 out and get what's
coming 10 US from a farmer. and
then yolckx' and away
when we went downstairs We
saw we was In the midst OF the
finest farming section We ever see.
About two miles away on a hill was
"a big white house 10 a grove sur.
rounded by wide spread agrieul.
turai axxiomeration ol fields and
barns and pastures ard oushouses
Whose house In THAR we asked
the landlord.
That says he. IS the domicIie
and the arborcai. terrestrial and
Horticultural accessories Of Farmer
Ezra Piunkeii. one OF our oountys
most progressive citizens
AFTER breakfast IN. and Andy
with eish, cents capital left. casts
the horoscope Of - rural potentsie.
LET me go alone says I. Two
Of us aEalnH; one farmer would look
ms one-widcd az Roosevelt using both
hands 20 kin a grizzly
AN right says Andy. 7 like
10 be true sport even when I'm
only collecting rebates from the
rutabaga raiscrr what bait are you
Eoing TO use for this Ezra thingT
Andy asks me.
"'oh.' says I. the first thing that
comes 10 hand In the suit oaSc.
reckon I'll take along some Of the
new income tar receipts: and the
recipe for making clover honey out
OF clabbcr and apple Feelings. and
the order blanks for the McGuffey's
readers. which afterwards turn out
to be Mccormick reapcrx. and the
pearl necklace found on the train.
and a poeketsize gold brick; and
a.
-rhat'il be enough snys Andy.
Any one OF the lot ought TO land on
Ezra. And. say. JEFF. make that sue.
cotash fancisr give you nice. clean.
new bills. It's "a disgrace to our de.
partment OF agriculture, civil service
and pure food law the kind Of stuff
some Of these farmers hand out 20
VI. I've had 20 take rolls from 'cm
that looked like bundles OF mlorobc
cultures captured out Of a Red Cross
ambulance
80. goes 20 livery stable and
hires a buggy on my looks. | drove
out TO the Plunkett farm and hitchcd
There was man sitting on the
front steps OF the house. lie had on
a white flannel suit. a diamond ring.
golf cap and pink ascot tie. Sum
mer boardcr.' snys I TO myself.
I'D like TO see Farmer Ezra
Plunkett,' says | 10 him.
You see him. says he. What
seems TO be on your mind3'
Il never answered n word ]
stood stlll, repeating to myself the
roliicking lines OF that merry Jingle.
The Man With the Hoe when !
looked Al this farmer. the little de.
vices ! had IN my pocket for bunco
Ing the pushed-back brows seemed as
hopeless as trying to shake down the
beef trust with n mittmus and a par
lor rifle.
well says he, looking AZ me
close, speak up. | sec the left pocket
OF your coat says good deal. Ous
with the gold brick first. I'm rather
more interested In the bricks than !
am In the trick G0-day notes and the
lost silver mine story
II had kind OF cerebral sensa-
ton OF foolishncss in my ideas OF
ratiocination. but I pulled out tho
little brick and unwrappcd my hand.
kerchief off IL.
zone dollar and eighty cents. says
the farmer netting II in his hand. is
IL "A trader
1.-THE lead In II Is worth more than
that says |. dignified. | put II back
in my pocket.
IAN right. says he. But l sort
OF wanted II for the collection I'm
starting. ] got a $1,000 one last
week for s210.'