The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1921-02-24
FATS AND LEANS
TO STAGE MATCH

~ VenV6 GHuIb VII
STOP! LOOK! LISTEN!
ATTEND
Important Question to be Decid-
ed for All Time.-Whether it
is Better to Be Fat or
Lean.
On next Friday, Feb. 25, there
will be played, at the Y. M. G. A.
game of basket ball which should
settle the important question of
whether a man should be considered
as slipping little when he starts
ordering pants in progressively
larger waist sizes. The two teams
which are to play in this game will
be made up of fat men on one side,
and lean, lank individuals on the
other, and they will be known, re-
spectively, as the Mellen's Food
Babies and Living Skeletons. Bill
Robinson is captain of the heavies,
and he has posted large guarantees
that there will be nobody on his ag-
gregation who does not measure
farther around the equator than he
does from pole to pole. Art Nell
son, who expects to pilot the String
Beans to a glorious victory, says
that the fellows with bay windows
are all has beens, but that when a
man has to stand twice in the same
place in order to cast shadow, he
can consider himself in the pink of
condition, and fit candidate for
his collection of fence rails.
So far, Caption Bill has enrolled
under his banner Doc Axley, Jack
McRae, Ralph Block, Elmer Olson,
"Doc" Ward, John Gibson, Kirk
Gibson, Fatty Bodin, Jake Segal
Jim Raarup, G. L. Knots and you'll
have to admit that this is sub
stanial crowd. Some of them
haven't quite made the weight yet,
but Doc Axley has prescribed large
doses OF Tanlac, and by the night
of the game, any one of these
gentlemen will be as tall lying down
as he will standing up, which will
prevent their slim opponents from
driving any advantage from push
ing them over.
The Bean Poles have so far sign
ed up Carl Jehle, Melius Sylte, p.
w. Picklismer, Ed Plant, Dewey
Raarup, Rev. Waters, Enock RocRs
stad, Jim Morris, Ever Bolin and
Elmer Oistad, which looks like a
formidable aggregation, and they
are already making up for their
lack of grith by throwing out very
heavy chest. We are pinning all
our cash on the Baby Elephants,
however, for very good and suffici-
ent reasons. In the first place,
the Sims will have a pretty hard
time finding each other when they
want to pass the ball, as the visible
space will be pretty well filled by
the Fats, and an occasional Tooth
Pick here and there will be anything
but conspicuous. For the same rea-
son, they will not find it very easy
to get the ball safely passed to their
team mates, as it will be very diff
fcult to throw it under, over, around
or through the living wall of flesh
which will be in their way. And
if by any chance the referee fails to
keep the team we'll in hand, and al
lows any rough stuff, good night to
the Strings! They certainly will be
snarled up some.
This great event surely ought to
prove a very pleasant break in the
monotory of the Lenten season. Per-
haps you don't feel that you ought
to dance, or drink, or smoke an aw-
full lot at this time of the year, but
there certainly are no restrictions
ON laughing, and we guarantee you
a side-splitting half hour. Don't
miss it.
After the blood has all been wiped
up, and the missing teeth and eyes
all recovered and restored to their
rightful owners, there will be- a
rapid fire demonstration between
the Washburn Scout team and the
Globe Trotters of Ashland. The
Scouts have used up all the teams
of their own weight in this neigh
borhood, and have found that they
have to go out Of their class to get
any real competition. The Globe
Trotters are a 1876 lb. team, which
is about 20 lbs. to the good, over
the Scouts The game will be
fast and furious, whoever wins it.
This is the last home game the
Scouts will appear in before their
playing trip to Duluth and Super
ior next week. Come out and show
them that their home town is right
behind them all the time.
L. 1Sr.%r