Evening star., 1921-11-12
LAUGH M|SS||NGAS
DELEGATES GATHER
Wood Thinks Smile May Do
/ Much to Prevent Future
Wars.
STORY OF A SECRETARY
How Presidents Choice Was Left
Out Because Chairman For
got His Name.
BY JUNIUs b. WOOD.

got His Name.
By JUNIUS b. WOOD.
One thing missing from the grave
discussions of the Washington confer
ence is the laugh. Though universal
through the world in the piping days
of war as in the doldrum years OF
peace. the smile has not received Its
deserved attention in the great as
sembly. 1t has been there and will
continue. Even grave statesmen can
not live without 1t. Journalists, cor
respondents and reporters nave taxed
their brains and amazed a reading
world with learned discussions OF ORR
entail mysticism, terrifying figures on
armament and inside theories OF
diplomacy, but little has been heard
of the laugh which makes all the
world akin.
HumOr In a Sad Face.
Possibly the missing feature will be
supplied by a sad-faced man who
wandered down the corridor of the
. State Department yesterday looking
for delegate to the conference. He
did not find anybody at home. for all
who could get ticket or fight their
way through the crowd were at Ar
lington. The serious man explained
that he was organizing a league for
the telling of truth and thought that
an Endorsement by the conference
might give international approval to
the idea. Many wish him success in the
field he has selected.
The humor of story which had
edited the visiting delegates as an
example of the nations free and easy
politics is not appreciated by several
dent indicated to one of his new ap-
pointees as chairman OF one of the
most important national boards that
he would be pleased to have a certain
young man named as secretary. VI
course the new chairman, the mere
directors as we'll; were ready to please
the President. The young man was
a stranger to them. but they were told
that he would be waiting in the ante
room when the board met that after
noon.
Reaches 18th Hole Late.
The chairman was late. 1t had taken
him longer to reach the eighteenth
hole than. he expected and the direc-
tors were waiting when his car whirl-
ed up and he made rush across the
anteroom. The young man rose up
and greeted him. The chairman only
paused.
That's all right" he said with a
fraternal pat on the shoulder. Il
know the Presidents wishes. Just sit
d
finish a little routine business we'll
elect you secretary"
The young man subsided at ease.
The chairman almost reached the
committee room door when another
young man stopped him. He also was
a young man that he had never seen
before. Both were newspapermen.
The last young man introduced him
self with a business card. He wanted
an interview.
with pleasure" said the chairman.
But the board is waiting for me.
when we finish I'll give you all the
time you want.
"His Name Is-
The routine business was brief The
chairman's gaze swept the mere d.
rectors with the superiority of con-
fidant of state secrets.
"Gentleman," he said, II am propos-
ing as secretary of this board man
who has done much for our party
and whose election will give pleasure
to our President? His name is
The chairman paused as hundreds OF
village chairmen had paused after
similar eulogies. when they forgot
the name of the visiting platform nero
they were introducing. But the chair
IL graceful wave of the hand. The
hero was in the anteroom. The chair
mans hand dropped into his pocket
and a card nestled in his palm.
His name is he continued with
hardly a pause. Yes, his name is
Mr. -" he concluded reading the
name on the card.
He Was u Wise Young Man.
The chairman's nominee was unani-
mously elected. He was invited be-
fore the board and astounded with
the announcement from the happy
chairman that he was secretary. OF
the august body. He was a wise
young man who said nothing. bowed
and retired. The board departed sat-
body. Later they discovered their
mistake. but to rectify 1t would be to
laugh. The other young man got
secretaryship. but not as imposing q
one.
Even the solemn and majestic cere-
mony of the burial of the nations
unknown dead had an incident which
brought a smile. One correspondent.
on his trusty typewriter, was soaring
to the pinnacle of waving flags and
salty tears. when in comes telegram
from a fairly large Wisconsin news
paper. 1t read:
Telegraph at once the names Of all
OF WisconSin'S unknown dead.
World Can Always Laugh.
Inc WOTlQ can always SIOp 10 lduk n.
On the day the American troops cap
1ured Fere-en-Tardenois. was plod-
ding through the one-time village
street. Above the rattle of wagons
the shouts of soldiers and the occa-
sional crash of a shell as the enemy
dropped one more in the village they
had lost came the thump-thump
thump of a cabaret air. Inside the
remains Of a house, a gaping wall
where once had been a window, roof
and ceiling tottering, a doughboy
was banging a piano. Dust from the
fallen plaster had dimmed it's luster
rifles and tin hats were tossed against
its mahogany, outside companies were
marching forward and ambulances
were bringing them back. The rattle
of the fight was less than a mile
away, but the gang roaring out a
catchy song still had time to laugh,
though their time was only q few
minutes away.
Possibly an occasional laughs for the
delegates during their stay in wash
ington may do much to prevent fu-
ture wars and save expenses of arma-
ment
Copyright. 1921