The Washington herald., 1921-04-03
,URUDoLPH PREKM
CONDITIONS MUST BE
TERIBLLE DOWN THERE.

URUDoLPH PRRKNSlI /
CONDITIONS MUST BE
TERIBLLE DOWN THERE.
Spartanburg. S. c.. must be in a,
bad way. according to Bernard
Kepsh, soldier of fortune-or rath-
er. misfortune-whoh honored the Po-
Ice Court with a visit.
Barnard said that there was moth
ing 10 eat In that town. There
fora he came to Washington. via
the blind baggage. to keep from
stayvfng-and was arrested as he
hoped OF at the Union Station by
Detective Springman.
DON'T see why the people down
In SpartAnburE don't have as much
to eat ~ We do up here" COM
nantsd Judge Hardison-
-Bsrnard could see no reason for
that condition. either. but Just the
sane he considered II advisable to
DO Ais eating here
,.However. he won't do much of
thax hare fhe court remarked that
10 already have enough stray Wis
tapzD hsre fvho e9f. but don't work,
vnAoak hnporttng any more from
s0ukh, carolinA
BsfnArd promised to eat his next
Bsd IN Phfladelphia and the court
let him 60 on probation with the
understanding that he get to the
CITY Of Brotheriy Love as fast as
he could. IL not sooner.
LAW1ER PAYS
CLIENTS FINE
Yaur Honor" said Dave Wolf,
Io
client Of mine. is a waiter at the
Town and Country Club. A good
many members of the Bar Associa-
t1on are members of the club"
Is that = reason for his condi-
tlsnr asked Judge Hardison.
OA, no, answered Wolf. 1T only
gess to show that We lawyers think
ssiSt Of James He Is a good. steady
reltabls fellow"
That being the case. some Of you
Iavysrs can pay his nne of $40 for
bsing drunk" said the Judge
That means that will have to
pay 1t mysslf." remarked Wolf, as
he sheIled out the ten iron men.
Lneas was arrested on q street
northwest BY Policeman J. r. Sulli-
van. What he drank stin remains a
mystsry.
HIS Ash WAGON
Is HIS CATTLE
Henry MILLS. ons-time coal HEAVIER.
but more recently an ash HEAVIER.
must get himself q microscope and
hunt forla . job. II he don't ind one,
the government will furnish him
Not since Christmas has Henry
Nu. hAtr A AA n
mpch himself. He eats his meals
At home, but sleeps in an old ash
wagon with . big clinker for a
pillow.
Policeman Wilson arrested the
man altar complaint had been made
that he had been using the ash
wagon As q hotel for more than a
month
Tia testimony showed that Henry
had been offered . job-but refused
to timber mp and 60 to work. As
long as his folks fed him and he
had the wagon to sleep in. 1t was
testified, there would be no work
done ~ him
IF you DON'T get . job in the
next few days. the court warned
him. -youn 90 to jail for ninety
days.
JOE LIKED sARDINEs
MIXED IN NEAR BEER
Joe stearns had just settled down
in his new home with Margaret, his
wife. ard was celebrating because
their furniture
They had a little spread Joe was
very fond of sardines and near beer,
while wifey stuck to candy and
cake
AZ they were about to finish Joe
poured some of the near beer into
an empty sardine can and rinsed II
around n little and then drank Il
This horified wifey. She read the
riot act to him. That started
Joe lost his head and tapped
wifey across her couture with ar
empty bottle and almost drove q
hair pin into her skull. the storJ
goes
He promised the court never tc
do II again and was put on proba'
tion>
WHEN BERTHA MEETS
DORA THINGS HAPPEN.
A dozen or more women were
gathered together one night at Ella
Smiths home for q chin-fest. Tht
talk as usual turned to the mascu'
line. tribe
Bertha Thompson. an engaged
girl, did not agree with anything
uHcomplimentary about the mel
Folks. She found herself all alon'
On this point 3
THE rest Of the women began tC
Case her and when they discovered
that their remarks went over hel
head they started to knock hel
fzncee.
The upshot Of Il all was tha
Bertha invited Dora McReynold
odtsfde for . fight. Dora accepted
The challenge. Ella acted as ref
cree. .
Although Dora was bigger ant
stronger than Bertha, she got I
licking at the hands Of the smalle
Woman
Just as Dora was about to hi
fsertha with q stick. two policemen
came along and put an end to tn,
feht and arrested them both.
The heavyweight tried to put al
the blame on the lightweight bu
tie light-weight had the heavies
evidence on her side and made ligh
Of the heavy-weight's testimony.
The result was that Dora wa
fined SO and Bertha let go withou
any nne at all. Hurrah for JUS men
VIOLATES PAROLE, so
COURT SENTENCES HIM.
Last August Thomas Fisher wa