The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1921-05-18
The Diary of a Pale Blue Ass.

May Ito the office early, as usual
Morning mail assayed some ,contributory gold
Most welcome contribution, however did not
come by mall 1t was handed me by the
cashier. Home early, where found T. l.. w.
H. t. d. m. S. under the weather las some one
once wittily described a slight illness). Es-
sayed the compiling Of the evening meal, with
even less success than usually attends the COM
piling of colyum- The pork chops were an
utter failure. However, We did not have to
cut them; We merely broke them of and ate
them with a spoon. Adding to the evening"
entertainment the devil again assailed the in
1ured foot, tofturing it till late when at last
left him to his devilish devices and embarked
- the Sea Of Sleep. Found it rough but
tpassable.
May 15-Up at $3.50. Breakfast with the
family IA weekly occurrence only After
Daughter and the Young Ruffian safely off to
Sunday school piled the broom in desultory
FASHION and rendered other first aid to T. L.
Who, ETC., after which l gave my weekday
trousers their Sunday pressing. Could l but
write as well as press pants, thought as l
proudly surveyed my handiwork, could af-
ford to hire some one else to do less skillfal
Job Next week hope to do this Saturday
night, that may 60 to church Sunday morn
ing. =. We 1.-THE Lady and u ferried to Day.
export this afternoon to set the air We got
it. l wonder why the exit doors of the Day-
export ferry slip haunt the two brass plates
labeled Push; for no one wants out until the
ferry warps alongside and then there is no
need TO push, as the doors swing outward when
the ferry turnkey pulls rope. But l could
wish Cap Henderson would have the brass hand
rails ON these doors polished They are most
unsightly. The ankle has not panied all
day and tonight succeeded in coaxing from
the palm of my right hand the elusive half
for two weeks. Were prone to worry at any
time should begin tonight-for apparently I
have nothing to worry about
May 16-Reminded this morning of Walt
Masons statement anent drawing the line
some place.. l drew it from the porch to the
garage and back again. Topped the colyum
this afternoon with some verses which. were
they printed in Germany. probably would he
regarded a. a PROCLAMATION of hell. I
wonder il there be such a thing as reinear-
nation! II so. what a sinner must have
been in my former state!
May H-Lent the dignity Of nv presence
to tho press box at Douglas park this alter
noon Tried to persuade the city editor the
sports editor, police reporter and A. P. teIeera-
pher to get out the colyum for me, Int thew
declined the honor. Some people are so uh-
appreciative am writing it at home. At
the close OF the first game the police reporter
sighed and remarked: Say. what would Won
call this game, anyways! The answer. I told
him. could b found only in Shakespeare. The
eea.e snouAo - CdI0o COm0Qy OF ErrOfS",
With the umpire playing the lead. Had
to choose between being an umpire or old KING
Lear, should choose the lot OF that unhappy
monarch.
THOSE Who have been aggravated by the
reticence Of Fred Beauvais should feel "a
freshed BY the frank statement Of Emil van
Gosthem. 2cline's untamed parent.
, E.m seems to Be ese Of the I'm teil tho
"eaa sOs. r. e MIG