The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1921-02-23
I'M OPEN LETTER.

Because I'm FOR you.
rye waited till you picked your cabinet
Before sat me down to write this letter.
/ view your various choices With regret
They could b batter.
! don't approve Of Mr. Charles E. Hughes;
He wears hts whisksrs Just like Jimham
A brainisr man. Of course, You couldn't
choose
But what's that TO us? i
This man you've picked to watch the treasury:
what. sir. may We expect Of Andrew Mellon?
Well, as my grandad used to say to me:
'Ther' amt NO tellin''
John Weeks for war scc.-man! We might get
In case Of war-1 think that choice is wrong
Instead Of week. 1 think you should have
picked
A man named Strong, sir!
/ see you have succumbed to friendships lure.
Well, Daugherty 10 wise; no man is saner.
Helismake Z good a. g.-but are you sure
He's no Sim Feiner?
And Mr. Hayes for p. rn. g. Oh. well,
At least Wills said to be nifty dresser.
But O! he cannot hope to e'er excel
His predecessor!
But here's one port find in all this storm:
| Ed DENLY whom you've picked to head the
I navy
Ia man who wore the khaki Uniform
8 all to the gravy!
Though Fall, interior secretary, s not
| To be compared with some OF our own
Caesars,
I shall not knock him. for he made it hot
| For all the greasers
This wallace-picked for agriculture Sec
l tell you frankly, sir, have no time for.
He's all right, but his names too hard, by Hex,
| To find q rime for!
For commerce sec. Friend Herbs your one
best bet;
I like him for his record In the Hun days.
| / like him, yes; but o! CAN'T forget
Those eatless Mondays!
Now who is. in the name OF Conan Doyle,
This labor secretary, Mr.. Davis?
We might approve him II from too much toll
The man can save us.
Although your whole burned cabinet I've
Don't think want a lob, please, Mr. Harding.
But let meAstate. lest you misunderstood.
I'll stick to harding!
THE thought comes to US that within two
weeks after presidential cabinet is named
not one person in q thousand is able to say
who's who or what. May we not tbetore may:
noting becomes passed. suggest that you clip
the foregoing lines and paste them over your
desk? Then you may one day astound your
friends by readily naming the secretary OF the
interior or some other obscure member of the
presidents Official family. Oh, as Mae
Tinee might say, don't mention it; y'wekkum.
@The Adventures Of Ruth.
bushnell Corr, Galesburg Republican
Register).
Our young friend, Miss Ruth Rose, is
certainly having very serious time OF
it. She is attending school at Holly
Wood, Cal, and q short time since. while
absent from her room, some one ertered
the same and relieved her of some very
fine jewelry and furs, and with only
short time intervening. word to her
friends in Bushnell reveals the fact that
she has again been the victim of hold
up. While riding with friend their
auto was stopped and Miss Rose was SO
scared when they were told to hand over
their valuables, that she gave very
loud scream and the wouid-De robbers
gave up the job and made their getaway.
HARRY KENDALL Of this city, who
Through no fault of his own is brother
to Odeekay, recently became the father of a
boy who has BEEN named Howard Alvin, The
other night Mr.. Kendall answered the phone.
"Is this Harry Kendall?" inquired masculine
voice. Yes, sir" well. say" continued the
voice, have you a new baby boy at your
houss?" Eyes, sir" Then, by gosh, you owe
me about box of cigars!" "How Gomez de-
handed Mr.. Kendall. well, my name is Harry
Kendall, too, and I've been receiving congrat-
ulations over that boy of yours for a week
and passing out cigars to my friends because
I couldn't convince 'em the baby wasn't mine" "
tn ho &c tIok
the innocent Mr.. Kendall's initials are.H A., !"
rs are those OF the baby boy he has been
wrongfully accused of possessing. There is
but one thing to regret about this amusing oc-
|currence; that is, in our opinion. And that is
THAT Odeekay wasn't the7recipient of the un-
Welcome congratulations. Of this colyum
doesn't appear tomorrow you will understand
that we are in court preferrins charges of as
sault and battery against Odeekay).
1No, NO; LIKE SOME WOMEN, OUR BALLAD
| MAY HAVE BEEN GOOD BUT
BEAUTIFUL? ALAS, NO!
Sir: When l sent you the name "Bonmilla
Herdlicka" for use as the basis of a ballad /
really felt that was going to stump you, but
even as turned away from the mail box the
music Of the name began to ring in my mind
in q new way. and soon found myself fash
ioning thsse poor verses, which, perchance,
nay be able to ride the waves behind your
beautiful ballad.
BONMILLA HERDLICKA.
Bonmilla Herdlicka, odd little name,
Dactyls, the footsies to measure the same.
Sweet little maiden, she, Belgian or Dutch.
Rhinelander, Polander. or something such
Bonmfila Herdlicka. 'Merican now,
Makes In new country her coming out bow;
Father and mother and brother are here, \
Surely we'll give them all welcome and cheer.