New-York tribune., 1921-12-17

can the reindeer get over tho fence?
A jolly lot, tho advertisement copy
writer's. "You may never have Happy
New Year IL you don't use Queed
Chains" we can imagine one Of them
writing. Or your Christmas will be
unhappy if your gifts are stolcn.
policy in the Kris Kringle Casualty
Company will protect you"
The Motorists Bartlett
How happy I'd be with the flivver,
We're t'othcr dear Chalmers away.
B. V. N.
Where Hank the lowiy aivver ran
Past taverns pleasureless to man.
L. G. T.
Rolls Royce, thou dark and deep blue
auto, roll LUCULLUS 4d.
1t strikes us that the comparison be-
tween Babe Ruth's transforming and
Judge Landis's baseball job is no good.
There is nothing in the rules or by
laws or constitution to keep Babe Ruth
from running billiard parlor or
book store or livery stable in addi-
tion to his baseball business. Prob
ably there would be some objection
made if Judge Lands tried to sit as
Judge in st. Louis three days week
and in Chicago three days week.
But why, II he has the ability, he
shouldn't take a $42, 500 baseball job
on the side, we, for one, can't see.
No objection by the baseball man
ayers ever was voiced because Mr..
Ruth and other players "wrote" news
paper articles, but that probably is
because most baseball players write
with as little effort as they read.
"rhat Reminds Me-
Editor of The Coming Tower,
New York Tribune,
New York City.
Dear Sir: Something in your
column recently reminded me Of
story told mo when 1 was teaching
country school. The story was about
like this:
In neighboring district there for
merly lived man named Jake who
was noted for wearing leather boots
after other folks had discarded them
and for enjoying many a drink when
he went to town. Hardly necessary to
explain this as being prior to the
eighteenth amendment.l
One day he had partaken very freely
at the village hotel, so much SO, in fact,
that instead of driving back home he
decided to go to bed right whero he
was. On being shown a room, Jake
Immediately rolled into bed, boots and
The latter's remonstrance brought
only the sleepy assurance, "Never
mind, Mister Walker, they are just an
old pair" Yours truly, V. NJ. B.
Walton, N. Y.
What gave Us sleepless afternoon
was not that story, but, as we tossed
about from side to side, wondering
what it was in this column recently
that reminded V. NJ B. of that story.
THE DIARY OF OUR OWN SAMUEL PEPYS
December 15-Early up, aud to the
office, and did some work, and Hilda
and Mistress Anne Colby came to
luncheon, and left soon thereafter, and
I finished my stint, and go to Mistress
Martindale's at tea-time, and had some
cakes, and had some talk about
journalism, and all said they thought
newspapers should be printed without
any editorials, which is not bad idea,
save for this: there is no law COM
pelling readers to read editorials, law
most readers know and take advantage
of, methnks. Home, and found j.
Kern and Eva there, and M. Glass, too;
a game called Shedding Light, wherein
one describes character in history
mythology, or literature, and all try
to guess its identity.
16-Lay later than | like, and so to
the office, where all day at my stint
which / thought l never should finish
"There are a3,o00,OOo bricks in the
yards at Haverstraw," testified Mr
Dent Fowler jr. 81 haven't sold brick
in two months" Aud when one says
something about bricks without Haver-
straw one has exhausted the already
weak possibilities of that wheeze.
Since bootlegging whisky--and e
Washington dispatch says only / pei
cent of it Is real whisky-has grown
so common, new meaning is attached
to the phrase the Burden Of Proof.
In Kin Hubbard's new Almanacl
, there are some keen animadyersions OF
E Loving Cups; but they were made be
+ fore Marshal Foch had received golt
, card of membership to some club OF
other
well" said Chicot, crashing his way
past women and children, to the Office
"why, since the Marines are guarding