The Birmingham age-herald., 1921-09-20
ANDREW AND TMOGENE
By ROE FuLKERsoN

Andrew came in from a lodge
 meeting and Imogene kissed him and
 laughed hysterically.
 "Oh. Andrew" she exclaimed, q
 have been so frightened. You know
 that I do not mind staying home alone usually, but tonight I heard
 something in the dining room that I
 was sure was burglars after the sill
 yer. I have been so frightened"
 Pooh" said Andrew disdainfully.
 Burglars nothing. If there were
 burglars here all you would need to
 do would be to snap on the lights
 and they would run, or if you
 squealed once they would have
 knocked a window out getting away"
 What do you know about bur
 glars ss said Imogene. You talk as
 though you had associated with a
 burglar all your life. I'll bet yoa
 never saw a burglar,
 Indeed" said Andrew, seriously.
 T had one experience with burglar that l will not forget as long as l live"
 That's funny" said she, doubt fully. T never heard of it before" Tt happened once in the summer while you were away" he said. I
 did not say anything about 1t for hCdt IL WOuiN 9ou. ~ was
 hot in the office in the day time. and had an important case working over, so I brought the papers home with me.
 T guess it must have been 2
 o'clock in the morning. I was working there at your desk. That drop light comes down so low that
 there was little light in the rom. and I was working busily. Once I thought 1 heard a noise down in the
 dining room, but I did not bother
 about it, for I knew we had taken all the silver down to the safe deposit
 early in the summer, and there was
 nothing of any particular value in the house.
 Suddenly I heard a step not yard away from me. and looked up into the gloom outside the circle of light cast by the lamp. and there stood d hulking figure of man with one arm extended in my direction. and as the figure gradually came out found I was looking into the muzzlc
 of pistol. The open end of the bar
 rel looked as big as railroad tun- mel to me. I laughed aloud It evidently made
 an impression onN the burglar. for he remarked that was very cool one, while as a matter of fact the laugh ter was entirely hysterical told him I WIS col because I knew that he had TO desire to hurt me. and that he was a burglar and we had noth- ing to lose. He wanted to know why we had nothing to lose, and I ex- plained to him that as it was sum-
 mer, and we were away from home a
 great deal. all that we had that was of value was in the safe deposit box, ha ha i. " and he wanted it without any furthe CT
 foolishness. I told him what was a fact, that I had less than dollar
 in my pocket. because I knew I was not going out that night and would need no money. i He looked doubtful at that, and
 so I went further and explained tn him that I was a professional man, and the only valuable thing about l me was my brain. for it was with this that I made my living. even If i. was not much of a living.
 | He lowered hisNpistol for minute and asked me if it was really fact that the only thing of value had was my brain, and I assured him that I was telling him the truth" | Andrew had been undressing as he ], talked, and he now reached up to turn out the light and stopped talk | ing.
 What happenedas" asked Imogene I breathlessly.
 Why he was burglar, of course, and as the only thing l had was my. 1 brain, he blew 'em out with his pistol 1 and took 'em with him."
 1 He turned out the light and from | the darkness came the remark: "Oh, that explains it."