Arizona republican., 1921-03-28
THE ONCE OVER
THE POPULAR SONG

ground that modern songs are degrad- 1 ing.-News Iten.) NO use pushing about the beetsi" exclaimed the stern chairman of the Committee to Purify Words and Music; "Nothing at all suggestive of any thing will be passed by my board of censorship, nor will anything suggest 1 i've of nothing.' But,' began the song writer. Enough!' cried, the stern chair man; let us not waste words. Just varble over what you have to offer and let me be the judge" have here new number that ouShta knock 'em dead" said the song writer
 "shoot" ordered the chairman of the Committee to Purify Words and Music And tho youth began: @Sha may have seen better days. when
 she was in her prime: Shc may have seen better days once
 upon a time;
 though by the wayside she fell she
 may mend her ways Some poor old n
 "sToP." bawled the censor. How dare you try to get away with any such corrupt and thoroughly degrading number? No ladies are to be allowed to fall by the wayside, or away from the wayside for that matter. in any lyric from now on.''
 But this lady = began the song writer
 Tush," commanded the censor. eff this particular lady whom you have In mind fell by a wayside as you suggest, let her lay, Or let her lie, according to your theories of grammar and fair play to the fair sex. If my committee was to set precedent by allowing one song writer to pick up this lady and drag her into nnnu1ar Ua uro,fld have every song writer in the country drag Eing the waysides of our fair land for similar material"
 T have another little thing" sug- gested the song writer.
 You may fire when you are ready Gridley,' returned the censor. AJust tell them that you saw me and they will know the rest: Just tell them that I'm looking well, you know;
 Just whisper, if you get a chance. to
 mother dear, and say,
 love her as l did long years
 ago -o-o-o"
 Impossible" roared the censor. sWhazzamattcr?" demanded the song writer.
 Have you no regard for the morals of our people?" argued the censor. But this number had quite a vogue in the late eighties" insisted the song writer. "Still, if you insist, I might put it over like this:
 Just tell them that you saw me and
 they'll know what is meant, sir; The rest of what I'd like to says de-
 leted by the censor"
 AThat's better" agreed the stern one "Any others?"
 ~Ive a number called She's More to Be Pitied Than Censured," said the song writer.
 More to be pitied than censored P inquired the stern one.
 ~Not censored censured, explained the song writer. Tt goes like this:
 aShe's more to be pitied than censured She's more to be helped than de spised:
 She's only lady who ventured On lifes stormy way i'll advised: Do not crush her with words harst
 and bitter.
 Do not laugh at her shame and down
 fan
 For
 "Tt'n never do,- interrupted the censor. 'Such words as shame and downfall no to mention the phrase Iife's stormy way have a harmful influence among our young people. and some of our old ones as well. The people would never stand for such 2 number. You might change the word. ing and have her venture some place other than life's stormy way. Wh, not have her venture into the monthly oyster supper and social at the Foul Corners parish house? That would be setting the lady on the right pati aud would point moral And thel you could close the song with the las two lines:
 Do not ply her with stale oyste
 crackers;
 Do not feed her with oyster un
 tanned.
 .Do you get the idea7 A sort c pure food song. I suggest this as great number for Eat Fish Day"
 Here is one you may approve of. suggested the song writer:
 "Jadda, Jadda, Jadda,
 Dada dee dee dunn dunn dah,
 Jadda, Jadda, Jadda,
 Dom pun di- do de dum-tah.H
 The chairman of the committee purify words and music thought a mo ment.
 "The Jadda part is all right" he fir ally concluded, ''and I think the da das and the dee-ees may be inoffer sive but don't know about the oon pums and the dum- tahs."
 ~Take back your gold. for gold ca
 never buy me.
 Take back your gold; you promise
 we should wed d-d."
 Pardon me-" said the chairma that's a perfectly scandalous numb some upstart of a lyric writer is tr, ing to put over on my assistant must go and warn him of the viciol trend in modern song writing" MAN O WARS TRAINER IS TRIE
 Louis Feustel, trainer of Man War has had his application for a cense tabled by the Jockey club TT officials refuse to give the reasons, b it is understood MT. Feustel is to questioned regarding certain condu' News Item)
 Jockey Club Prosecutor: %Mr. Ecu tel, to the bar! You are charged wi very serious violations of precede and custom in the matter of hor racing. What is your plea, guilty very guilty?"
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