Atlanta tri-weekly journal. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1920-19??, 1921-03-17
COREY DISCOVERS
PERUVIAN HOTEL
LIFE IS EXCITING
BY HERBERT COREY

| in each Lima hotel. Up home the
hotel guest punches a button and
rings in some distant room. Then
a very handsome and courteous bell
boy appears and gets the order,
which he carries out without I'M
varying accuracy and extraordinary
| despatch. Sometimes he does all
that, anyhow.
Down here the hotels buzer is a
| gong about the size and noise of
that which awakens the firemen in
| Delaware, Ohio. The functionario
proaches the balcony built round the
! interior court of the hotel. These
hot-country hotels are all built
around courts, which are open to
the sky, but shaded from the rays
of the sun by curtain that screech-
es to and fro on pulley wires:
Once" he inntones, "Doce."
When One wakes, All Awaken
Those cabalistic words mean elev-
en- and twelve, or whatever other
of the room in which the indignant
guest is impatiently awaiting the ar
rival of his breakfast. AS soon as
the first man in the hotel wakens
and calls for food all the others
waken. The process is an auto
matte one. No one can keep awake
when those alarm gongs start. The
| others then being punching their
| respective buttons and ringing
fresh. changes on the gong. The
! functionario rushes back to the
gong and looks at the indicator and
then hurries back to the balcony
| rail.
''Trienta, catorze, oos, veinnte Y
una" and many other numbers he
| intones.
So far as I know that is all that
| ever happens. The bells ring, the
functionario shouts, and the guest
| attacks another of the large black
fleas which are so prominent a
part, of Peruvian hotelscapes. A
| homeless flea would be a great i'm
provement down here-I hate to
! hear them crunch.
Il Americans National Dish
| By and by the guest uses what is
| left of the water in the pitcher for
a fairly clean place on the towel
and goes downstairs. He sees per-
sons eating breakfast, in the room
set aside for that purpose. If he Is
| an American he enters and orders
| ham and eggs.
ways order ham and eggs. 1t is a
sort of rite with them. No matter
what may be the delicacies of a
| country's cuisine, the loyal Ameri-
can always demands the sizzling
product of sty and hennery. If he
I
| of the most useful combinations in
the spanish-Peruvian language is:
"No hay"
phrase book and labored through
| polite conversations about the ex-
| treme violence of the rain outside,
although it has not rained in Lima
this year, he finds the word for
breakfast. He plays it up and down
JJf ia or6
| The chico-a chico isn't a polite
| word in Spanish, but all Peruvian
walters are addressed as Chico
listens for time and then recurs to
his conversational terminus.
Some More "No Hay"
"Coffee," says the exasperated
guest Il want cof-fee!"
Isl, ST, senior, replies the chico
suddenly enlightened. 1t has not oc-
should come into a room used exclu-
sively for breakfast purposes. He
brings coffee. 1t is good coffee,
though not the sort of coffee we are
used to. 1t is very black and has
been over-roasted. so that it is almost
bitter. Then he springs a surprise:
Sandwich"
The guest si-si's with violence and
the chico asks a lot more things in
Indian-Spanish Finally he gives it
up and brings the sandwich. 1t is
composed of a small, hard silver or
ham or cheese between the desiccat-
ed halves of q petried bun about the
size of a silver dollar. No one ever
gets anything else for breakfast in
Lima. No hay.
La cuenta." demands the guest.
He is on sure pathological ground
this time. The one word in the Span
ish language of which is absolute
ly certain is that for "the bill" The
chico brings it. Then you begin to
understand why all Peruvians call all
walters chico. He has charged you
for oranges, a couple of alligator
pears, bottle of mineral water, and
other odds and ends. At first he sim
ply looks into the distance and enun-
ciates the total. Then he writes it
down for you. Then he reluctantly
the unsportsmanlike conductof the
guest.
No bill is ever right In a Lima
hotel or restaurant. 1t is not expect
ed that it should be. That is a little
game that is played between patron
and chico. Sometimes Gringo will
pay it under protest: After the e first
seems to be that if the chico puts
something over he wins a point. He
never has the least shame at being
found out. Next time. you enter he
calls you Loudly:
Senior! Senior"
And if you do not come to him he
shakes his head with a sad smile each
time he catches your eye. There is
one invariable rule, apparently. He
never thinks of charging more for an
article than the price on the bill.
Maybe it has never occurred to him
to do so. Maybe he isn't equal to it.
His plan is merely to add and null
tlply the number of articles you have
had. .-
Empty Bottles as Evidence
The same rule applies when you
go to pay for your room. An Ameri-
can friend paid out this morning.
When he was handed his cuenta he
set up a turbulent cutlery. He
scratched off item after item and
finally came down to one which he
seemed to think was a real mistake
But / have had nothing to drink
in my ROOM" he said. 81 do not drink
at ALL
'Senor," the functionario said with
an unbelieving smile, the empty bot
ties are in your room"
They were, too. Some one had
taken the pains to cart a number of
empty bottles into the room Of the
departing guest and list each on his
bill. He didn't pay, Of course. The
trick was too childish. .
Even in the clubs of Lima-and
they are very ne clubs indeed-the