davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Free trader-journal and Ottawa fair dealer. (Ottawa, Ill.) 1920-1927, 1921-11-05

If Henry Ford's synthetic COW were
on the market the New York milk
strike might be robbed of its terrorS.
Free trader-journal and Ottawa fair dealer. (Ottawa, Ill.) 1920-1927, 1921-11-05

This is perfect package month for
opressmen. But the packages are
far from perfect after they get smash
eG around enroute.
The life Of a burglar seems to be all
roses and no thorns hereabouts.
Free trader-journal and Ottawa fair dealer. (Ottawa, Ill.) 1920-1927, 1921-11-05

And while the conference on the linz
itation of ornaments is on, will the
critics kindly limit their criticism to
what calls for criticism?
Free trader-journal and Ottawa fair dealer. (Ottawa, Ill.) 1920-1927, 1921-11-05
How are the bets layln92

Sweep out the empty wards IN the
hospitals. Company coming. II
The West Virginian. [volume] (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1914-1974, 1921-11-28

-Fairmont is Ready to Greet You
-Fairmont is Ready to Welcome Y
-Fairmont is Ready to Entertain
-Fairmont Wants to See You!
-Fairmont Really Expects You!
-Fairmont is Ready For Any Call!
The Washington times., 1921-04-13

ciple and immediate parent of des-
potism; a we'll disciplined militia,
our best reliance in peace and for
the first moments of war, till regu-
lars may relieve them; the suprem-
acy of the civil over the military au-
thority; economy in the public ex-
pense, that labor may be lightly
burdened; the honest payment of our
debts and sacred preservation of the
public faith; encouragement of agri-
culture and of commerce as it's hand
maid; the diffusion of information
and the arraignment of all abuses at
the bar of the public reason; free
dom of religion, freedom of the
press, and freedom of the person
under the protection of the habeas
corpus, and trial by juries impair
TALLY selected.
"These principles form the bright
constellation which has gone before
US and guided our steps through an
age of revolution and reformation.
They should be the creed of our po-
litical faith, the text of civic instruc-
tion, the touchstone by which to try
the services of those we trust; and
should we wander from them in mo-
ments of error or alarm, let us
hasten to retrace our steps and to
regain the road which alone leads
to peace, liberty and safety"
The Washington times., 1921-04-13
HUMANlsMS \
william Atherton Du Puy.

In that prime requisite OF the politicians, a
memory for names, Postmaster General Will II.
Hayes is the most gifted man in public life A
name and face. once given him. becames cata-
logued in his mind like a card into index file
and is there for good
One afternoon, when he had been in charge of
his new Cabinet post about two weeks. he sent
word around that he would meet everybody in
the building from scrubwomen to bureau chiefs.
They all came, 1000 of them They shook hands
and gave their names. Mr.. Hays careful to
get each cognomen correctly in mind II some
clerk sought to hurry past the chief would stop
him and insist the
Next day he began meeting these people in the
halls and in their offices, calling them by name
all of which helped materially in establishing
human relations.
The State Of Massachusetts, has III miles of
seacoast, which is a good deal of waterfront for
so small commonwealth or that length $50
miles are in the Congressional district of Repre-
sentative Joseph Walsh. of New Bedford. There
is no other bit of land in the United states that
has so much waterfront in proportion to it's area.
This Sixteenth Massachusetts, district includes
Cape Cod. which runs far out to sea- hooks
around, touches much salt water. but has a limit
ed square mileage.
There fishermen in Mr. walsh's dis
trct than in any other. 1t has an absolute mo-
nopoly on Plymouth Rock. where the Pilgrims
landed 1T produces a great many cranberres
When Mr.: Walsh was capagning, friend
drove him out on Capt Cod, where a group ct
seafaring people were demonstrating their ver-
satility by working in the cranberry bogs. Mr.
Walsh was introduced to their leader. who was
a bushy- bearded former sea captain.
This individual looked the candidate over
noted that his stature was diminutive, o ah ,yt
the degree of that of Napoleon Bonaparte, and
remarked:
1t looks to a seafaring man as though you
were not picking very big ones this year"
Senator LeBaron Bradford Colt of Rhode Island
was Federal judge in Providence for twenty
seven years before he came to the United States
Senate, where he became chairman of the COM
mittee on immigration. To one who had been
cloistered the numerous problems as to the
administration of laws controlling the admission
of million people a year into this country SEEM
ed at first quite beyond his grasp. SO, one day,
he exclaimed in evaporation:
why did take this charms nship? why did
I not select the chairmanship of the committee on
the five civilized tribes instead?,
Copyright 1921 by Public Ledger Coz
The Washington times., 1921-04-13
1t Certainly Is Fine to Hear
WashinqtOn Talk American

How quickly a sensible peace
could have been made.
How different the wretched, mis-
cradle, broken world would be now!
The only thing our policy needed
since that day of German surrender
in November, 1913, was courage
frank, honest, straightforward, truth
full courage.
The whole world would have been
far along the road to recovery from
the dreadful wounds of the war if
our Government had made clear it's
determination to insist upon the
exact fulillment of the solemn
pledges and repeated public declara-
tions of its own purposes and OBJ
jects in making war.
That noble opportunity slipped,
unregarded, from the knees of the
high gods.
The valor that won the war was
wasted by the moral cowardice that
lost the peace.
But now again, God be praised,
our old American spirit is again evil
dent in those whom we have chosen
to speak for us.
We do not have to hang our heads
when the insolence of foreign diplo-
macy evokes no challenge from
Washington.
We do not have to blush for shame
to hear our Department of State
echoing the words spoken for it's
guidance in Downing street or the
Quai d'Orsay.
Our America has found it's old
voice-that voice which menaces the
rights of no other people in all the
world, and which sternly forbids any
other people in all the world to
trespass upon our. rights, to insult
our sovereignty, or to derogate from
the dignity, the majesty and the re-
nown Of the Republic.
wv oCClu W Scc OuT America
again, rousing herself like lioness
that has slept while. prowling jackals
snarled and fought around her, and
putting the astonished crew to flight
by the majesty of her indignant
waking.
And again we say, happy day!
For, if the signs fail not, we have
Americans again on guard in the
high places of government-real
Americans, real men, with the same
kind of blood in their veins that our
two-fisted, outstanding, dandy, dear
old daddies had.
We ought to be glad and thankful
and proud.
Indeed, we ought.
The Washington times., 1921-04-13
Ubon1as Jefferson
Born 17S Years Ago To-day He Still Offers Wise and
Timely Counsel
(From His First Inaugural.)
Timely Counsel.

,<< 4 BOUT to enter, fellow citi-
~ zens, on the exercise of
- duties which comprehend
everything dear and valuable to you,
ut is proper you should understand
what deem the essential principles
. of our Government, and consequent
| ly those which ought to shape its
administration. l will compress
them within the narrowest compass
they will bear, stating the general
/! principle, but not all its limitations.
equal and exact justice to all
men; peace, commerce and honest
friendship with all nations, entang-
ling alliances with none; the support
sof the State governments in all their
rights, as the most competent admin
Iistrations for our domestic concerns;
the preservation of the General Gov
ernment in its whole constitutional
lvigor, as the best anchor of our
peace at home and safety abroad; a
jealous care of the right of election
by the people-a mild and safe cor
rective of abuses which are Topped
by the sword of revolution where
peaceable remedies are unprovided;
absolute acquiescence in the deci-
ssions of the majority, the vital prin-
ciple of republics, from which is no
appeal but to force, the vital prin-
The Washington times., 1921-04-13
MANLY sELF-CoNTRoL

E. j. WARD tells of fine example
OF self-control on the part of a Tech
High School boy. A Tech team of
hall players got on a Ninth street
car and this young man happened to
trip over the foot Of an old man
occupying seat. Then the young
man sat down in the narrow space
beside the old fellow. somewhat
squeezing the latter, who promptly
cursed the youngster. The latter
merely returned the compliments.
wbereupon the old man made a vi
clous pass at the boy with one net.
The manly boy merely grasped the
old man around the body and pre-
vented his striking again. After the
struggle other boys asked him why
he did not use his fists.
"Never!' he said. "He was older
than my father"
The Washington times., 1921-04-13
Stars and Stripes

When style goes to church it worships only at
the shrine of it's tailor.
A leaky old pot and man pitted with faults
will not stand mendng.
Where hatred between rivals is greatest their
right to the prize is least.
We can raise the fallen quicker by the hand
with service. than taking them by the ear with
a sermon.
4 discouraged cat makes an ambitious mouse
Anger is an ungrateful guest that robs n
mans mind of reason, and then sets fire to IT,
No man can bore his way into the sympathies
OF another by being a bore.
Good fortune never stands still: to enjoy its
company We must therefore keep up With IL.
The Washington times., 1921-04-13
IT certainly is gratifying to read
once more notes from the Depart

4
once more notes from the Depart
q ment of State that are written in
Iplain American, that speak Ameri-
can sentiment, that are genuine
EAmerican goods, all wool and a yard
wide.
Happy day!
Secretary Hughes plain, manly
statement to the allied powers
Bounds like old times.
! 1t is the kind of note that Marcy
used to write, that Webster used to
Nwrite.
1t has the straightforwardness and
Nigor of Grover Cleveland, the logic
pf Abraham Lincoln.
J After eight years Of official COM
hunications which meant anything
or nothing, it is downright refresh
Sng to read diplomatic note which
has but one meaning, which makes
that meaning as clear as sunlight,
and which breathes in every word
the firm resolve of the Government
of the United States to enforce it's
6ust rights and uphold its prestige
and sovereignty at any cost against
any challengers.
The governments of England,
France and Japan are very plainly
told by Secretary Hughes that
neither they, as joint powers, nor the
so-called League of Nations, which
Is their rubber-stamp, Will be per-
mitted to dispose of the equities of
the United States, to assume any
authority to use the name of the
United States, to bind the
United States, or to disregard the
United States in disposing of the
territories lost by Germany in the
war which the allies lost and the
United States subsequently won for
them.
The Empire of Japan is told in
vigorous and unmistakable words
That the United States has rights in
The Island of Yap which were won
by the army and navy of the United
States by hard, bloody, victorious
fighting, and that no decree of an
allied council and no agreement be-
tween Japan and other powers can
forfeit those American rights or dis
pose of them without the consent of
the American Government.
That certainly is American talk
plain, old-fashioned, outstanding,
manly American talk.
Again we say, happy day!
And, oh, if we only had had a
man to talk like that in Paris!
The Washington times., 1921-04-13
The fellow who says search
me-" rarely carries anything
worth searching for:
f. VETTER.

In an Alabama newspaper
man advertised that he wanted to
marry "a neat, plain girl" adding
that "vamps, butterflies. race
trackers. sweetie hunters, butter
fly hosem, all silks and telephone
bugs" need not apply. He GER
tainly did shut out a lot of 'em.
EAMON o. S.
The Washington times., 1921-04-13
THE PAST AND FUTURE.

THE PAST AND FUTURE.
191S-Rum. rye. gin.
1919-2.75.
1920-Home brew.
1921-Memories.
1922-Tobacco.
1925-Near tobacco.
1930-Rope.
1940-Corn silk.
1945-Near corn silk
BAL POLLY.
CHARLES H. RUOFF, manager
of the insurance department of
BOSS g. PHELPS, offers the editor
liability insurance against the Gin
creasing danger of being hit by a
golf ball." There used to be a time
when the worst danger of golf was
in the high ball at the 10Th hole.
Volstead removed that.
SPEAKING OF ORIGINALITY.
One of these brainless he-flappers
recited a clever little verse the other
day.
"Oh, is that original?" I inquired.
mo, indeed" he replied. 81 made
that up myself" ANNA COSTA.
The Washington times., 1921-04-13
BY HAZEL NUT.
THE HOBO's PRAYER.

THE HOBO's PRAYER.
Oh! my stummick Is Jest akein
For a little bite of bacon,
A slice of bread, a little mug of brew.
I'm tired OF seeing scenery,
Jest lead me to q beanery
where there's more than only air to chez,
l. M. A HO. 30.
The Washington times., 1921-04-13
GOOD FOR THE G. o. c.

Much good original matter Is
coming to the G. o. c. now. The
family" is working together in
harmony. and THINKING-think-
ing up good things for their ia
vorite column. There are hum.
dreds OF bright minds studying
nonsense. fun and fact for the
column. and all that has been
needed was for the fans to begin
to apply these keen minds toward
sparkling original matter.
Good work, contribs! You are
getting there now as you never
did before. BILL.
The Washington times., 1921-04-13
SHORT LINE POEMS.


/. A QUARREL.
Sniff,
Mif,
Tiff, =
BIFF!
Stiff.
3 AN AFTERNOON TEA.
Giggle,
Gabble,
Gobble.
Git,
8. EVOLUTION.
Smouldering fire,
Weather keen,
Cook Maria,
Kerosene.
Splendid FIRE,
Blazing light,
Cook Maria,
Angel bright!
"HooDA THUNKIT."
The Washington times., 1921-04-13
SPECIAL PRICE.

Auto Owner-How much will 1t cost
to fix my carr
Garage Man-Whats wrong?
Owner-I don't know.
Garage Man-SiS.50. r. M. w.
The Washington times., 1921-04-13
MIR. B. Baer
LOOK BEFORE YOU LOOP.

This is the fourth month
of the year. BY a fair Re-
publican count. The dog
wood blossoms are barking
into bloom. The lawn mower
squeaks in borrowed glee.
Only forty-six merry Xmas
instalments remain to be
sduelched on that happy
Yuletide gift OF 1920.
The Washington times., 1921-04-13
LIES MAD HURRY.

Wealth and warfare, work and worry,
Is driving the world distracted;
Mortsls feel weary of life's mad hurry,
The cesse'ess clamor of strife and scurry
Grows irks,me when re-enacted.
GEORGE SANDS JOHNSON.
The Washington times., 1921-04-13
HIDDEN NAMES.

Here are some more hidden name
puzzles, the first one being of birds:
He apologized with much awkward
ness.
I threw my card in, all the others
doing the same.
Lip lovers are seldom heart lovers.
Trees on the avenue make good fire-
wood.
The zinc ran evenly into the molds
These are of fish:
Gosh. ! nervously opened the win
dow.
His temper chanced to make him
angry.
/ wish a day would come when I
could have plenty of money.
The committee approved it unani.
mously.
Grab as she did and you won't fall.
HOMELOCK SHEARS.
BILL AND THE BILLY.
Bill and Billy make a good pair
As for openers. both are right there.
Bill takes the good, Billy the bad
Bill only laughs when Billy gets mad.
Bill took Billy to Bowie-on q pass,
Bili gambled on ponies. Billy on the grass,
Bill came home sad Billy content
Bill lost his money, Billy, not a SCENT.
The Washington times., 1921-04-13

Rosalie-Ah mus go home an take
nah beauty sieep.
/ Sam-Gsl, ef you is sleepin' to get
beautiful. you amt nevah goin' to
wake up. TOM CULHANE-
The Washington times., 1921-04-13

In New York's dry raids" they
arrested a man name Ginricco.
That thirst-inspiring name will
awaken many memories.
JULES b.
The Washington times., 1921-04-13
WARMING!

WARNINGS!
Be careful how ye live, oh youth so gay,
One solemn fact in life remains un-
shaken
The man who saves his liver while he may,
Will hnd in age that he saved his bacon!
BOX CAR HARRY.
The Washington times., 1921-04-13
111EARla sEEnA
By BILL PRICE.
THE MOTHS.

lnE MOInS.
Two little moths did I behold,
A sittin' on my coat
They were thin "Doggone the cold.
They said, ut gets our goat"
i told 'em not to Chew the rag"
Just leave my coat complete.
They heaved sighs Don't winter lag
Say, lady. when do we est7"
PEANUTS.
The Washington times., 1921-04-13

Another summer is almost
here with it's near hopes and
beers. It's new hopes and
fears. Shall we caravan 20
the country to get snapped
at by tourist-eating skeet-
ers? Or shall we lurk in the
city and make the commuter
chewing skeeters come 10
us? Either way is just as
economical to the skeeters.
The Washington times., 1921-04-13
THE &. o. G.

THE G- d. e.
At times rye written poetry,
Now some may call IL prose,
One or two of them were printed,
Where the rest went no one knows.
Please don't think that I am knocking.
For that's something l despise.
And your columns fair and square. Bill,
It's a good sight for the eyes.
IT'S full of wholesome sunshine,
And il always brings smile,
For II never fails to cure our sils,
Has all others beat a mile.
Every night my wife greets me,
She burns each and every bean,
And I wait and walt for supper,
Till she reads Heard and Seen.
GIMME b. OOZE.
Q-whats the difference between
manufactured" and "made?"
"A flivver is manufactured q
hold four people, but it's often mad,
to hold eight or nine.
PEGGY BEE.
The Washington times., 1921-04-13
Now's the time to buy ther-
mometers. They'll soon be going
up. SAYS WHICH.
COVER THE HILLS ETC.

COVER THE HILLS" ETC.
Get onto this sign:
'Shubert-Garrick Theater This week,
over the Hills to the Poor House
Accompanied by the Orchestra"
CHIMES.
RICHARD o. SMITH comments that
the pictures in this play are the fin-
est he has ever seen of the beau
tiful mother-love that thrills us all.
The Washington times., 1921-04-13

Folks will soon be pulling
an exodus from the comfort
able racket OF the city. They
will rattle forth to the
healthy verdigris green OF
the laughing farmlands to
pick a nosegay of skunk
cabbage, rutabagas and
freckles. It's tallyhoi for
the unjoyed allure of the
weeds in the far reaches OF
Jobs country.
The Washington times., 1921-04-13

After thirteen and one
A-rube-ian nights. you es-
cape from the place of far
reaches back to the short
reaches of New York's one
handed lunch parlors. Whom
twilight succumbs to the
Poormint Chewing Gum. the
Shirtless Button and the In
digestible Breakfast Food
electric ads, the baby starts
to cry in a metropolitan
minor key, the dumb"
waiter rope shrieks to ito
mate, the l. trains kettle
drum by. the wife bawls you
out plentiful.
Be II ever so palatiai.
there Is no place like home
to suffer.
The Washington times., 1921-04-13
BILL AND THE BILLY

GSrr~s n. o. g. Co..,
The Washington times., 1921-04-13

Far reaches OF the wilder
ness. Poetry. The garden
spot is tapped by a railroad
that is dying in it's tracks.
The garden spot is more
spots than garden. And all
the far reaches you see are
at the dinner table.
The Washington times., 1921-04-13

The wifi develops a triple
distilled crouch. The kids
are full of the wrong end7
OF bees. You walk yourself
camel-toed looking for n
snifter in a district where
they think the 18th amend
ment is on the level.
The Washington times., 1921-04-13

Two weeks in the country
Is a great education. You
learn how to find your shoe
in the dark.
The Washington times., 1921-04-13

OUR PENNANT.
Drawn by JOSEPH A. LYNCH.)
New Iberia enterprise and independent observer. (New Iberia, La.) 1902-1944, 1921-09-03
LOCAL NEWS.

Next Monday the 9Th, the
good sisters of Mount Carmel
Convent will begin the 1921
1922 session of the Convent.
The branches taught in this
famous religious training school
is English, French, Commercial
and Academic courses, book
keeping, typewriting. stenog-
raphy, music and fancy work.
This educational institution has
bright prospects for the largest
enrolment in its history. The
lovely building which is steam
heated and sanitary is one of
the ''show spots of Louisiana
and even at the termination Of
the sessions each year dozens of
the boarding pupils are 10th to
leave the lovely surroundings
and the influences of the good
Sisters.
New Iberia enterprise and independent observer. (New Iberia, La.) 1902-1944, 1921-09-03
Mrs. C. B. DeBellevue Of

Mrs. C. B. DeBellevue of
Crowley arrived here last Thurs
day to be the guest for a few
days of Mrs. S. B. DeBellevue.
Mr.. Calm, the enterprising
haberdasher of Jeanerette was
a business visitor in New Iberia
on Thursday.
Born to Mr.. and Mrs. Julius
Derouen, 619 Iberia Street, on
Thursday evening a girl.
Master L. F. Lallande, a son
of our fellow-citizen. Mr.. I. L.
Lallande has been seriously i'll
at the Dauterive Sanitarium
the past few days. The young
man it seems had been a victim
of appendicitis unknown to him
and when his condition was OBJ
served by his physician, his APP
pendix was ruptured. He was
operated upon on Wednesday
and on Thursday morning was
reported in critical condition.
Miss Yvonne Deucasse spent
several days in New iberia this
week, the guest of her friend,
Miss Ruby Thiery.
On Wednesday afternoon,
Miss Katie Murray entertained
at cards in honor of Miss Lyon
of Baton Rouge. These who
enjoyed the games were Misses
Nina Burke, Ruth Gebert, Mil
bred Weeks, Ethel Carver, Pau
line Suberbielle, Melba Lyon
and Ellen Suberbielle. The
guest of honor was presented
with prize.
The Bridge club met Thurs
day afternoon at Miss Ethel
Carver's. The first prize was
won by Miss Marie Renoudet.
the guest prize by Miss Katie
Murray and consolation by Miss
Theda Murray. Those who en-
joyed the games were Mesdames
Robert Perry, Earl Roy, Leon
ard Barrow, Albert Hill, Edgar |
Dupre,, Perry Burke, Misses
Melba Lyon, Pauline iSuber-
belle, Marie Renoudet, Nina |
Ellen Suberbielle, Pearl
Davis. Sadie Belanger, Katie
Murray and Theda Murray.
New Iberia enterprise and independent observer. (New Iberia, La.) 1902-1944, 1921-09-03

st. Peters Catholic College
in charge of Brother Arsenius
will begin its next school term
on Monday next with a large en-
rollment. When the school
closed several months ago to
give its pupils the summer va
cation the enrolment was over
two hundred. The Brothers now
looks forward to an increased
number and the faculty of nine
able instructors are now ready
to begin the session. This in
stitution has grown in leaps and
bounds since it was founded by
Rev. Canon ]. M. Langlois, v.
G. and it will not be many years
before more additions will
again be necessary to care for
the patrons.
New Iberia enterprise and independent observer. (New Iberia, La.) 1902-1944, 1921-09-03

The committee in charge
of the plans to build a road to
Vermilion Bay from this City,
a distance of some fourteen
and a fraction miles which
would give the people of this
Parish a bathing resort on the
sea coast have negotiated with
Capt. Thos. Jones to make the
preliminary survey. Capt.
Jones the engineer will COM
mence active work on the pre-
survey next Monday and as soon
as his estimates of the cost have
been tabulated. it is then pro
posed to push the movement for
an extension of the present New
Iberia Commercial Canal tax.
New Iberia enterprise and independent observer. (New Iberia, La.) 1902-1944, 1921-09-03

Rev. Noise HILBERT sung the
High Mass at St. Peters Cath
olic church last Sunday. Very
Rev. Canon ]. M. Langlois de-
livered a fine sermon on 0he
duties and responsibilities Of the
priest of God. Father Hebert
is q native of St. Martin parish
and is the first priest ordained
in the diocese of Lafayette. The
choir which consisted of the
Brothers sang in plain chant.
New Iberia enterprise and independent observer. (New Iberia, La.) 1902-1944, 1921-09-03

This tax will expire in about
nine years and it only remains
for the citizens to vote its ex-
tension and in that way funds
will be available to cover the
cost of this gigantic enterprise.
The sentiment in New iberia is
almost unanimous as regards
this Improvement, if it is proven
feasible by the engineer.