Ellsworth American. [volume] (Ellsworth, Me.) 1855-current, 1921-10-19
Barney's Wedding
Suit
BY WILLIAM FALL
9. 1921, Western Newspaper Union


the bride of a year eff anything
should happen to YOU"
But nothing is going to happen to
me, little chick" said bluff, happy
Bob, her husband "See here, you
sensible pet" said Bob. "Once year
the managers at our establishment
meet. Suggestions as to improving
trade, getting acquainted, promotions
awarded-and l expect one, mind
you-and real, good jolly fellowship
all around"
"Just think, though if they should
tempt you, Bob !" persisted Mrs. Aims
lee. "A dark night, lonely neigh
borhood, miles away from home. Look
at that man l hire to do our chores,
and think what temptation has cost
him."
"Eh! oh, yes" responded Bob,
glancing past the porch at man pill
ing up klndling wood in the back
yard. "Your protege, he looks fairly
comfortable, for all these temptations
you tell about"
"Just now, maybe but he was
wreck, and I reformed him. He looks
so comfortable" explained Laura
Ainslee proudly, because 1 give him
all your old clothes. He's waiting
for the season to pass to get the ones
you're wearing now"
"Oh, he is ~ remarked Bob. "Well
he'll have to wait two full months for
this one"
He's patient, dear" said Laura.
"Oh, Bob l feel SO pleased with old
Barney, as they call him. He's
given up drinking and is saving up
money. And what do you think He
is actually talking Of getting married
to a widow who owns restaurant
car. I have an idea he Is counting
on that suit of yours for the we'd
ding"
well, good-by." smiled Bob" Home
the earliest 1 can, and clear water,
dear, believe me-"
A fine fellow of his word, honest
Bob went his way. A big-hearted lit
tie phianthropist, Laura proceeded to
the yard.
"That was my husband, Barney"
she said.
"Yes'm; often seen him; often re-
marked how happy he oughter be
with a wife like you," bowed and
scraped the polite tramp.
"That suit he has on told him
you were waiting for It,"
Barney only grinned his delight at
the announcement.
"See here, num-" said the tramp,
1.-THE fellow who wouldn't try and
make good after being treated like
man as you have done, is no gentle
man. That suit !" added Barney gloat-
ingly "say, I dream about it nights.
I've sort of made it the top stone Of
responsibility My, won't l shine. I'm
deeply grateful mum, truly humbly
grateful"
Barney finished his task. Then
he came around to the back door to
report. Mrs. Ainslee handed him a
half dollar.
Barney felt quite proud as he
thought Of the anticipated garb. He
went to a restaurant, and then he
strolled around for an hour, and fl
nally landed at moving picture show.
1t was eleven o'clock when he fol-
lowed the crowd out to the street.
1t was drizzling trifle. AS he passed
well-known hstel, several gentle
men came out, shook hands in part
ing, and one of them, turning up his
coat collar, started on at breakneck
pace.
"Hello!" suddenly exclaimed Bar
ney with start and stare, "Why
that's my suit"
1t certainly was Bob Ainslee.
"Ive got to catch him." breathed
the ardent pursuer. cts beginning
to rain harder. Say, he'll spoil my
suit How careless some people are!"
About to hail Mr.. Ainslee, the tramp
broke into his best run instead. Pass
ing dark alley, Bob was halted by
three fOotpads.
Hands up, boss" ordered the
leader.
Biff bang-"POlice! ~ thus Bar
ney, his umbrella swinging hike "a
fail, his voice braying out in a hoarse
war hoop. At the corner a policeman
The baffled hold-up men
darted hack into the alley. Bob Aims
lee picked up his watch where 1t had
fallen when Barney struck up the pill
fering arm of the footpad.
"Why, my man! You arrived in
the nick of time, didn't your hailed
jolly Bob.
eyes sir. Umbrella, please, sir;
you're getting wet"
20, never mind that"
"But it's-it's my suit" explained
Barney desperately.
"Eh? ha! why, it's my wife's pro-
tege, declare! How came you here?"
Barney explained.
"See here, Barney" he said in
friendly way. "You call at my house
Tomorrow There will he something