davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Belding banner-news., 1921-12-07

1t is seldom that we pass along a
joke written in the form below, but
this isn't had for lightning repartee:
Englishman: Why, Pat, we run
our trains so fast in England that
the telegraph poles look like a tight
board fence.
Irishman. Do they now? Well,
when 4 was on a train one day in
Ireland, we passed first a field of
turnips, then wan of carrots, then
wan of cabbage and large pond of
water, and we were going so fast il
looked like Irish stew.
t*
About the only thing that present
day styles don't shows modesty.
Soon those who have money to
burn will be buying coal.
The married mans motto should be
United we stand-many things.
The girls nowadays seem to think
that they can improve on nature
and they can.
The Belding banner-news., 1921-12-07
FESTIVITIES OF OLD TIMES
Lord OF Misruie Was important Func-
tionary at Yuletide Celebrations
Of the Long Ago.

~ HE Lord Of Mlsrule was an impor.
w tant functionary at the Christmas
festivities of those long ago
times. An account of this important
parsonage has been preserved by the
historian and antlquary, John Stow.
who lived during the reign Of Queen
Elizabeth and during the first year OF
the reign OF King Charles |, and was.
therefore. contemporary OF Shake
speare.
In the feast Of Christmas" writes
Stow, there was In the kings house.
wherever he lodged, a Lord os Mlsrule
or Master OF Merry Deports, and the
like had We I'm the house OF every no.
bleman OF honor or good worship.
were he spiritual or temporal. The
mayor Of London, and either OF the
sherlffs. had their several Lords Of
Misrule."
At Cambridge university the Lord Of
The Belding banner-news., 1921-12-07

al alarm clock. Its bell wa. ring M
like everything. This was to wake the
Old Folks up.
First. he called the roll. tir see IL
they We're all up and awake. Then,
he began to pick the presents off the
tree
Soon the room was gay with dolls,
horns and jumping jacks.
A doll was riding in her carriage,
squeaking and rising up every few feet
aS she rode along.
There was talking doll, too. She
sang and talked when they pushed the
buttons on her dress.
There were hot dolls for cold nights
and cups and balls for the Old Folks
TO play with when they could not
sleep.
The old Folks all played with their
presents They blew on their horns.
and amused themselves with the jump
ing-iacks. and sent the moving toys
running about the room all az once.
But. after ALL the Old Folks thought
il wasn't so very much fun because
there were no real children there. So
they sent out TO see If they could find
some.
They found Lucy, Peter, Billy. Mary.
Sally. liilda, Ruth. and some other
children who all came 10 see the
old Folks Christmas tree.
Lucy told the old Folks the story
about her dog Trump.
Trump was u tramp dog. but he
could do some tricks. He loved TO be
dressed up in blanket, with a belt.
Then with beribboned straw hat
on his head. he would walk across
the room upon his hind legs.
After Lucy came Peter.
Peter said that he did not know any
for the big boys baseball team. and
they let him go in to see the base
ball game, free.
Then Billy told "A story.
He said that once he sat up all
night. waiting for Santa Claus 10 come
and fill his stocking. That is. he
tried To sit mp all night; but Santa
Claus didn't come and so he fell asleep
in the dark. The next day the doctor
came To see him. The doctor told him
he had had ''stockingitis."
Billy said, too, that when he woke
up in the early morning and found
that Santa Claus had forgotten To fiji
his stocking. he was going to throw
himself OH the floor and pound his
heeS on Il and holler. But then he
happened To remember how ugly his
The Belding banner-news., 1921-12-07

Misrule was master Of art, elected
to superintend the representation
Of Latin plays by the students. besides
taking charge Of their games and d.
versions during the Christmas season.
A similar Master Of Revels was chosen
at Oxford.
In the Inns Of Courts In London,
where the barristers had their Offices
and belongings, Lord Of Misrule
reigned with great splendor. 'being
surrounded with all the parade and
ceremony OF royalty, his guard Of hon.
or, and even his two chaplins who
preached before him In the Temple
church"
On the Twelfth day he abdicated his
sovereignty, and we are Informed that
In the year 1886, this mock-representa-
tive Of royalty expended In the exer-
else of his office about two thousand
pounds from his own purse, and at
the conclusion Of his reign was
knighted by King Charles l at White
hall.
The Belding banner-news., 1921-12-07
High Explosives

We thought we had discovered the
shortest poem in the world when we
ran across the little nonsensical
rhyme:
We
De-
Spise
Flies.
But now H. S. G.. sends in one
which eclipses even that. Ii is:
Adam
Had 'em.
He Got The job
Speaking of poetry, young fell
low just starting out i'm life applied
for position to a friend of mine.
His experience was practically nil
and so he made no mention of ii
and instead ended his application
with this poem.
/ may be the mayor of Timbuctoo,
/ may be hobo from Kalamazoo,
/ may like it cold, may like it hot,
And maybe I'm crazy and maybe Pm
not,
I've ears like wimpus and eyes like
cat,
But Pm willing to work for all oi
that
But seriously, do you suppose
that Miss Rappe thought she was
going to a Christian Endeavor class
when she went to Fatty Arbuckle's
apartments that night?
We know a fellow who stands in
front of bank for an hour every
day. He says there is money in it.
Clever Boy, WOt?
"The man went out. As he closed
the door behind him he left it ajar".
Everybody's Magazine.
The only time a man can have the
last word is when he looks on the
last page Of the dictionary. 1t is
"Zyxomma".
The Belding banner-news., 1921-12-07

that night, her mother said to her:
'What are YOU going 70 say, In
your prayer tonight. about that poor
little blind boy you saw to-day?"
so Hilda asked God about him.
The very next day she took the lit
lie blind hoy q big orange.
IL was now Ruths turn.
"Once | asked little girl II that
was her sister," said Ruth. The lit
tie girl said: u amt sister. It's
baby"
one of the other boys now had q
story 10 tell.
''Once | saw a cyclone come around
the corner of street." he said. "A
man had n tent there with a lot OF
dolls In 1t. The man wanted 10 sell
the dolls. but the cyclone took the tent
right up into the sky, with all the dolls
In IL.
another man asked him: What are
you making such a fuss about?
Weren't your dolls for sailT and
everybody laughed except the doll
man."
The Old Folks were having such
good time listening to the stories that
they thought the children ought to
have a good time, TOO. SO they took
all their presents that had come Off
the tree and gave them to the little
folks who had come In.
Every boy and every girl had toy
and box of candy-Lucy, Peter.
Billy. Mary, Sally, Hilda, and the
others.
Then, all the young Old Folks and
all the children marched around the
dining room singing.
They sang merry, Merry Christ
mas" and so the fun ended.
But guess II didn't quite end then.
either. For. as the young Young
The Belding banner-news., 1921-12-07
Saving the leftovers.

Instead of always frying up any left
over potatoes, why not use them for
hot tea scones? They only take a
few minutes TO make. TO half a
pound of cold potatoes add ew0 ounces
of -four and a teaspoonful each of
salt and baking powder. Knead them
all together. then add just enough
milk-sour milk II you like-to make a
stiff dough. Roll out and cut into
either squares or rounds with pastry
cutter or tumbler and bake on tin
In quick oven.
The Belding banner-news., 1921-12-07
First, He Called the Roll.

brother Harry looked when he did
that So Billy thought he wouldn't;
and he didn't.
Mary told about the songs she sang
tn her doll.
She said fhat the song that her doll
liked the best was:
The little dog went to the market town,
With one foot up. and one foot down;
But when he came TO muddy place
lie jumped cle-e-e-an over
Mary said that she always jumped
her doll at the Jump" part.
Sally thought that IL was a long
time since she had known a story,
"'most as long as the night before
Christmas" but she did remember
ride she once had on a little donkey.
She said they had TO send the old
donkey on ahead TO make the little
donkey hurry.
Then she remembered about the cats
at her grandma's house. There was a
big cat for the big mice. and q little
cat for the little mice.
HiIda told a story about little blind
boy she once saw.
When she said her evening prayer
Subscribe for the Ranner- News
The Belding banner-news., 1921-12-07

We thought we had discovered the
shortest poem in the world when we
ran across the little nonsensical
rhyme:
The Belding banner-news., 1921-12-07
Was He Shot Or Not?

A duel was fought between John
S. Knott ami Alexander Shott.
Knott was shot and Shott was not.
In this case it would have been bet
ter to have been Shott than Knott
At first is was thought that Knott
was not shot and Shott avows that
he shot not. which proves that the
shot Shott shot shot or that Knott
was shot notwithstanding. 1t may
be made to appear on trial that the
shot Shott shot solved into its orig
inal elements and Shott would be
shot and Knott would be not We
think, however. that the shot Shott
Who was shot?
School pads at the Banner-N News
office.
The Belding banner-news., 1921-12-07

clean water
The Belding banner-news., 1921-12-07

IL Old Folks de-
cided that il was
time for them To
be young again. SO.
they set up "A
Christmas tree in
Il corner Of the big
dining room.
Santa Claus came
bustling In and he
gan To make things
pleasant. Tied 10
his belt there was
The Belding banner-news., 1921-12-07
To sweeten Musty Teapot.

To sweeten a metal or enamel tea
pot which has become musty, fill it
with boiling water and drop I'm a red
hot cinder, close the lid and leave for
a short time. Then rinse out with
clean water.
The Belding banner-news., 1921-12-07

Folks went out Of the door and down
the street. the young Old Folks could
hear them laughing. long after they
turned the corner.
Resides. the young Old Folks have
been talking about their "Old Folks
Christmas" ever since.
The Belding banner-news., 1921-12-07
Put Him In Irons

There was a COB story going
around through the Navy camps dur
ing the war which possibly you have
not heard.
Rookie, on guard for the first time
sees Officer of Day coming: Haiti
Who goes there? (Fails to present
arms correctly
o. d.: Bonehead!
Rookie: Advance, Bonehead to be
recognized
The women did not put up much
fruit in Iona counth this year. The
men used all the fruit jars.
The Belding banner-news., 1921-12-07
Once a Sucker. Always

Lets see", said the peddler. eyes
this must be the house where my
friend said he sold the lightning
rods. So | guess / better offer my
newfangled BUTTERFLIES churn. | be-
lieve firmly in the old adage. Whom
man has done, man can do"
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1921-10-20
Stone Chick

! Miss Gladys Chick and Thomas G..
] Stone, both Of Cornish, were united in
marriage, Saturday afternoon, o.
, clock. at the Old South church in
j Boston, by Rev. J.. H. Gordon. The
double ring ceremony was used. Mrs.
J.. II. Wallace Of Haverhill. Mass.
and r. G. Ransom. relatives of the
bride and Mr.. and Mrs +. p. Fox Of
Medford Mass, uncle and aunt of the
groom were present at the wedding.
Mrs. Stone wore a navy blue panne
vclainc suit with Australian opposum
trimming. Her has was black panne
velvet and she wore n corsagc bouquet
OF roses.
Mr.. and Mrs. Stone arrived in the
city Tuesday and they Will he at 20
Willow street, for few weeks Mr.
stone has been located in this city as
temporary MANAGER Of the Augusta
district of the New England Tel &
Tel. company during the enforced
absence of Frederick T. Gray. Mr.
| Stone comes from the Portland divi-
sion Of the company. lie has made
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1921-10-20
Still Seized at Bridston

Deputy Sheriff c. Edward Abbott
CT Bridgton, accompanied by con-
stable. seized still, half barrel of
mash and a small quantity of liquor
Monday when they visited an aband-
oned barn in a field some distance
from any highway. The barn is
owned by Samuel Mitchell, who for
some time conducted store in
Bridgton, later removing to East
Brownfeld some time ago. Beeom-
ing suspicious upon learning that the
barn had been broken into, Mr.. Nit
chell notified Deputy Sheriff Abbott.
with the result that the latter's visit
revealed the still in operation.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1921-10-20
Growth Of the Farm
Bureau in ArOOstoOk

Presquo Isle, Me-, Oct. 19-The sec
Cnd annual meeting of the Aroostook
Farm Bureau and seed show will be
held on Oct. % at Perry theatre, this
town and about all Aroostook farm
CTS are planning to attend. 1t has
Lccn the general tendency of the
farming communities, as the people
become better acquainted with the
Farm Bureau movement and the CO.
operative agricultural work carried
on in the several sections, to organ
ize local farm bureaus ard to evcour-
age people to join.
The Farm Bureau organization in
Aroostooll started with member
ship Of 100 in II towns. The Aroos-
took County Farm Bureau today has
Sl2 members and 80 organized com
munities.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1921-10-20
Minting 100000 Sill
yer Dollars Daily

San Francisco, Oct 19-(By Main
Approximately 100000 silver dol
lars are being made daily at the San
Francisco mint under recent instruc-
tons 10 speed up production accord
ing to superintendent NJ ]. Kelley.
Every department is working to its
full capacity and the mint is so busy
that the plant officials have suspend :
ed, for time, the rules permitting
visitors TO inspect the establishment.
According to Mr.. Kelly. the COIN
Ing Of silver dollars is being in
creased in order that the government
might save interest on short term
treasury notes.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1921-10-20


Major William Quirk, who will be
here with the Salvation Army this
Thursday, is what can be termed a
Jolly good fellow" always wears a
smile. With his little Joe" as he
calls his banjo, he has no difficulty
in capturing a crowd, whether it be
in a building or on a street corner
He began his Salvation Army career
in Cleveland, Ohio, in 1894 and since
then has been constantly engaged in
the work. He worked for a time
with the United States army over
seas. and was well loved by the boys.
He now has the oversight of the
Young Peoples department OF the
Salvation Army in New England.
G. z. Wilcox of Augusta. we'll
known in automobile circles in Maine
and Massa chusetts. has Joined the
sales department of the Bangor Mo-
tor Co. beginning his duties Monday.
Mr.. Wilcox was for three years with
the Packard agency in Boston and
for the past 10 months has been road
representative of the Maine Automo-
bile Association, which position he
leaves to enter the employ of the
Bangor Motor Co. Thoroughly fami-
liar with the automobile business
and possessing a wide circle of friends
throughout the state. Mr. Wilcox win
make valuable addition to the local
concerns force and his coming to
Bangor to reside permanently is a
n nf GOOD 70 1,n ni
we'll as to the Bangor Motor Co.'S
large and increasing clientele.-Ban-
gor Commercial.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1921-10-20
DIED

CONNORS-Bangor, Oct II, Miss
Bridget \.
HJNNEWELL-Br Oct. 16,
Thomas r., aged s. years.
ST. LOUIS-Old Town, Oct. IL,
Frank, aged 81 years. II months. 23
REED-Bangor. Oct. II. Mrs. Laura,
widow of William H., aged IS years,
10 months formerly Of Camden.
KELLEY-Bangor Oct, Is, James
f.. son Of Mr.. and Mrs. Thomas w,
aged years.
McCOLLAR- slsowhegan, Oct. IA,
Earl. aged % years.
NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS.. Oct. II.
Guy L., of Dedham, Mass. aged IS
wears.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1921-10-20
Number Please?" and
How They Do It Shown
at Local Exchange

This is the week that the public is
invited to call at the local telephone
exchange Of the New England Tel. &
Tel. company. and inspect the build
ins Already number have taken
advantage of the invitation which
has been given and have enjoyed Wis
its through the exchange, being con-
'ducted by some official Of the COM
pany. A visit to the various depart
ments Of the work is a most interest
ing expedition.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1921-10-20
FARM BUREAU NOTES

The committee in charge Of the
annual seed show and exhibit of the
kennebcc Farm Bureau met,
Wednesday afternoon, at the Office
of the county agent and county
demonstration. Plans were perfect
ed for the coming event which will
be oct. % and which will he held ct
the State House.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1921-10-20

Mr.. and Mrs. c. w. Cummings of
Cushnoc farm and their nephew,
Harlow Bradford, were in Albion
over Sunday. Mrs. Sarah Cummings.
who has been passing four weeks in
Albion, returned with them.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1921-10-20

Mrs. Florence McGillicuddy is
passing a few days in the city as the
guest Of her sister. Mrs. T. NJ. Ware.
North Chestnut street. Mrs. McGilli-
cuddy has Just completed a most
successful season in charge OF one of
the houses at the Poland Spring
house. She has received number
Of fattering offers, one from the
Royal Poinsiana at Palm Beach,
Fla, which she is seriously consid-
ering.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1921-10-20

Ralph Atherton of Hallowell, who
fell a few weeks ago, from ID tree
when he was gathering apples, and
broke his left arm, was in the city.
Wednesday calling on friends. He
is getting along nicely and will be
able within a reasonable time to re-
sumo his duties at the Fifield Bros.
store.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1921-10-20

Levi L. Williams, local agent for
f. A. Strout Farm Agency has sold
the fine so acre farm owned by Abbic
NJ Taber, on the Taylor Road in
Windsor and bordering the mile
pond on the west shore. to Charles
2. Twill of West Hohoken. \. j.
who will take possession in the early
spring and make it his future home.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1921-10-20

Foley Cathartic Tablets are lust the
thing for constipation. Their action
IS wholesome and thoroughly cleans
ing. without gripping. nausea or incon-
venience. They Danish headache, hill.
iousness. bloating. gas had breath.
coated tongue and other symptoms OF
disordcred digestion. Mrs. II. j. Mar
chard. sc Lawrence ST.. Salem. Mass,
writes: Il used Foley Cathartic
Tablets for constipa tion with 'good
results. | keep them in the house"
Sold eyeryWhpre ADV
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1921-10-20

Hon. Frank r. Gurnscy, Rev. A.
w. Frye and Rev. II. f. Huse, Mrs.
Maurice Brown and Miss Mabel
True. all of Dover and Foxcroft, We're
in the city, Wednesday and attended
the Near East Relief conference.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1921-10-20

The annual Christmas sale of the
Claiming Guild of All Souls Unitari-
an Church will be held in the church
parlors Tuesday and Wednesday,,
Nov. % and 30.-Adv.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1921-10-20

Mr.. and Mrs. Charles Libby and
son Lewis, of Wintcrport. Mrs. l.. Fl.
Nickerson and Miss Cora Parsons OF
Swanvillc We're visitors of Mr.. and
Mrs. O. T. Robbins, Sunday. The la
dies are cousins of Mr.. Robbins.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1921-10-20

From Weeks Mills. Mrs. Ray w
Clifford sent a strawberry, fully
ripened it reaching the Journal Of
flee Wednesday forenoon. She is Of
the opinion that ripe strawberries At
this time Of year are more of a freak
than faspberries.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1921-10-20

The Claiming Guild of All Souls
! Church will hold their annual Christ
mas sale in the church parlors, We'd
nesday and Thursday, Nov. 3oth and
! Dec fSt.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1921-10-20

w. V. Tobey has resumed his dut-
les at the American Railway express
companys office, after being con-
fined to his home for week by ILL
ness
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1921-10-20

Mr.. ana Mrs Otis Il. Atherton OF
Lowell Mass. have motored to Au
gusta and are visiting Mrs, Athcr-
toms brother. Adelbert T. Sands, and
family at 5 Winter street for few
daJS
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1921-10-20
ILYKENNEBEC JOURNAL
T Telephone 1875

Cards Of thanks. obituary notices. res
olutions of respect, etc, viii be
charged at the rate of ten cents per
line. No charge less than 40 cents
Subscribers who fail to receive the
journal promptly will confer a favor
by notifying the office immediately.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1921-10-20

Ray Sanborn. who was thrown
from team, carly Tuesday morning
and sustained broken collar bone,
was reported, Wednesday as getting
along fairly well. He is at the Au-
gusta General hospital.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1921-10-20

The Ladies' Aid of the Green
street Methodist church will meet
this Thursday afternoon. $3.50 o'clock
with Mrs. Frank b. Mendall, 107
SeWall street
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1921-10-20

II. Chcrnowsky returned Wcdnes-
day morning from n few GAYS busi-
ness trip to Boston.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1921-10-20

The Woman's Club of the Penney
Memorial United Baptist Church will
hold their Christmas sale on Thurs
day Dec. s, in the church parlors.-
Adv
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1921-10-20

Members of Staples Camp, s. of V.
we hope TO see lot Of YOU at the
dance tonight at South China, G. A.
r. hall. Baked bean supper and mu-
sic by ToZier's orchestra. oct20d1t
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1921-10-20

Miss Bertha Hudson and Mrs.
Ethel Hartman of Winthrop were
here Wednesday, visiting friends
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1921-10-20

The Wohelo class will give Hal
Iowe'en party at the Penney Memo
rial Church Friday evening. Oct. %.
Admission 15c. oct2odlt%
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1921-10-20
LOCAL NOTICE

Special at f. Locke.s today: One
round of frankforts and one pound
of frankfort rolls for 80 cents.
oct ondIt
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1921-10-20
Thursday, October 20, 1921.
AUGUSTA LOCALS

Miss Dora Maddocks has gone to
Boston for a short visit with friends.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1921-10-20

Just received, Pictorial =, Review
fashion books for winter, c5c. each.
by mail Soc. LaBreck &S Lishness.
The Daylight Store octSdtf
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1921-10-20

many friends in this city during his
stay here and they wish Mr.. and Mrs.
Stone many happy years.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1921-10-20

I ess6ss .sss- ..soE..--.--
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1921-12-18
Silk ,Pethc0ats at

just lUU OF hem WI RO
All viii Be Sold. ........- UAsOO
Yes, sold before closing time tomorrow.
These SILK Jersey Petticoats, with their pretty
6ounces and lovely colorings are just the
Christmas presents hundreds are looking for.
And think, only sass.