The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1921-12-05
WOMEN CAN FALL
OUT OF LOVE, TOO,
SAYSD DOROTHY DIX
Middle-Aged Wives Can
Get Just as Bored as
Husbands.
By DOROTHY DIX.

SScHtcu WIcs VINO Al miuuie
age finds that her husband has tired
OF her. and is Indifferent to her,
even IL he has not wandered on
after some younger and fairer face.
We hear so much Of lonely wives.
and see SO many married women
working with might and main to
keep down their flesh, and keep
up their pep, In order to retain their
husbands affections that we have
fallen into the way OF thinking that
matrimony IL a perpetual picnic TO
women, ana that it is only men who
md 1t a rainy Sunday with rela-
tiyes in the country.
We accept the fact that the years
bring disillusion to the man. We
realize how the monotony of domes-
ticity gets on his nerves, and how
ne gets sick and weary of seeing
the same face across the breakfast
table from him. and listening to
the same complaints, and winding
the same clock. and putting the
same key in the same door at the
same hour every night.
We can see how his passion could
cool on as his wife's beauty faded.
and her peculiarities increased;
now familiarity could even blunt
ms perception Of her virtues, un-
I'll the time might come when all
he could see in her was just a
homely, nagging woman who sniff
lied when she talked and could
never let anything rest.
Far otherwise Is the popular con-
ception of the middle aged woman.
We picture her as sloshing over
with romance to her dying day. We
see her in an attitude OF perpetual
alteration before her husband, who
continues to be the hero of her
sirlish dreams to the end. We
never imagine her as growing tired
or domestic life, or as perceiving
that husband has gotten bald, and
oay-windowed. and prosy.
Men are especially committed to
this view Of a woman's heart be-
ing a perpetual motion machine
that never runs down after it Is
once put in motion. Therefore a
man never loses any sleep over the
problem OF how to retain his wife's
affections. He knows that he sim
ply can't lose her and that she Is
just bound to go on loving him be-
cause she can't help It. She's built
that way.
II appears that there is some
slight error in this view Of the
situation, and that very often the
Of matrimony as any man could be.
and just as much bored by her hus-
hand as he could possibly be by her.
At any rate, have gotten a lette,
from a woman who turns a most
interesting searchlight on this mat
ter. She says:
Il have been reading some of the
advice you have been giving to old
men who have wearied OF the
women to whom they are married.
and who want to swap off old wives
for new.
How do you know their wives
are not tired of them and glad to
have them go? A woman of so or
so may be done with romance. or IL
may merely be that her husband
doesn't look romantic to her as he
dozes over a newspaper by the fire.
and she would like 70 have a more
lively companion herself. II you
could look into the minds OF old
wives you would find many of them
are bored to death with their hus-
bands. It is hard to live with a
man forty years. and stay in love
with him. You know him too well.
"A lot of women OF so or so, re-
leased from the cares Of rearing a
family and helping to build up a
fortune, would like to have a fling
themselves. Not with another man.
Heaven forbidi They have had
enough Of matrimony. and its trials
and tribulations, but there are
other things for them to enjoy
pretty clothes. books. travel, plays,
cards, opera-the things they have
never had time for. or money for,
in their busy working years.
Many a middle aged woman, II
she could have these things in free
dom. would be perfectly happy.
ct am past so myself. and while
am used to having John around
and do my best to make him COM
Portable and happy. I don't kid my
self into believing that I am ro-
rnantIcaIly in love with him, or that
there Is a thrill left in my system
that he could arouse.
Hes a good man, as men go, but
there are a lot OF things about him
don't like. and that bore me to
tears. am tired OF his old jokes
that have heard a million times.
and If the way he swells up with
inportance when ne Is going 10 ex-
prrs. any opinion. as IL an oracle
were going to speak.
IT am disgusted by his rough
chin With a two days beard on ii.
and the sloppy way he dresses, and
nj. general untidiness. He falls
asleep over his newspaper Of an
evening and shores with his mouth
open. and that nearly drives me
mad.
y am sick Of having him yell at
me from the bathroom for fresh
towels, and the clothes that he
could easily get for himself. am
,Ir.d NJ having TO ask for money
that I have earned by my own
labor. and to which ! have a per-
feet right.
aT am weary OF having to side
step every unpleasant topic to
keep from rousing a devil of a
temper. and OF having to smooth
over matters. and present bills at
the psychological moment to stave
of family rows and scenes.
1T am tired OF pretending that I
think that a stupid, fat old man Is
the fountain of wisdom. and ro-
mantle hero. and little tin god on
wheels.
TT peves me to sit around and
watch a man give himself airs over
my success. my house. my
money, my cars. my children,