The Birmingham age-herald., 1921-02-26
!. M E N, W o Nj FEN
 A N D T H l N c s


 some of our n-municipalities, and an equally good story could be written about the smells of the Orient
 But my task is to be much simpler one, for I merely wish to call attention to the variety of flavors which are easily detected at banquets. There is the ban quet with a distinctly political flavor. There is the banquet with a religious flavor. There is the banquet with the legal flavor.
 I set down only few of them and leave my readers to imagine the rest was led along the line of thought am now pursuing by my trip to Auburn. for in a couple of days I had the pleas ure of sitting down to a quartet of eats, each one with a flavor all it's own, and being professional diner out, I had no trouble in appreciating the difference.
 The first was the banquet of the Trans portation club of the Montgomery Cham Der of Commerce, an annual affair which draws together the Heading men of the 1 Capital City. Chairman Lobeman and Secretary Caskie have every reason for congratulating themselves on pulling off such q bowling success, for the speeches and the fellowship were fine I enjoyed i touching shoulders with such splendid fellows and getting chance to address them.
 The second banquet got to register at was the one set at Auburn by the local alumni for their visiting brethren from all parts of the country. An alumni ban quet has a flavor all it's own. It comes nearest to ranking with a family dinner for it has all of the feeling of college spirit to give it the air of kinship 1t lis always time of mellow feeling. The older grads" beaming paternally on the lyounger ones
 John Denson of Opelika, who acted as tcastmaster, was in his proper element, for he knows the game. and what is more has the love of the alumni in high de- gree. For once felt that would have to sit patiently without chance of get ting in a word, for being an alumnus of the University of Alabama did not see how an opportunity would be extend- ed to me to take part in an alumni dinner of the Alabama Polytechnic institute.
 
 But there is where was mistaken for the Auburn bunch are good sports, and what was my surprise, after the welcome extended by President Ross, to be called upon to start the talk-fest. True to if for y<,I~~ <o~ Io notice on the public. eff you don't want to hear me talk, don't ask me- And some of my friends claim that they have no- ticed that frequently when I am not asked I volunteer, but I'll not attempt | to prove an alibi when accused of liking to make speeches.
 l I have never liked dull time, and so started somethingsas saw some co-eds present by saying that friend of mine stopped me on the street one day and said, Doctor. we know what men and women are, but what does. things stand for in your column ?' I, in spirit of fun, replied, for it was at time when the question of allowing women to vote was lin the balance, "oh; -things means suf- fragettes."
 Now. every one of my intimates knows full well that from the first I was an ardent supporter of womans 8 suffrage, even in the days when it caused any man who did so to be looked upon as queer if not a downright freak. I knew when admitted that had made such a at Auburn would hold my feet to the fire. and believe me, the charming speaker did it until they were we'll toasted, or perhaps the better word would be roasted. Now, tho reason I know that John Dem son is a Christian Is because he gave pe minute for rejoinder. It was one l time when man had the last word l The alumni banquet was enjoyable from start to finish, as no man, not even Presi- dent Dowell. fresh from his inaugural office which east a halo around his head. was permitted by John Denson, the reso | lute toastmaster. to speak over three minutes. I had claimed my rights as four-minute speaker to the extra min ute. but he set aside the claim with ruthless hand. He is the first southern chairman at public dinner who has run lit on schedule time. May his tribe in crease even though suffer at their hands in the abridgement of my talks. ] sat next to Toastmaster Sanford at the inaugural banquet at Smith hall ana he was in his glory. for he is an old hand at banquets at Auburn. A member of the board of trustees and a lifelong friend Iof tho institution, he loves 1t, and all who serve it or attend it. He was most happy in his preliminary remarks in tun- ling up the crowd to the right banquet pitch. This Is highly important, and either makes or mars the occasion. A good chairman can work wonders even with : lot of uninterestinE speak3rs 1 thought my endurance power around tho festive board would never be put to . severe test, for I have been profeo- sional attendant upon breakfasts, dtn- lners and suppers for moro than scoro of years, and thought was thoroughly seasoned sitter and an immunixed eater; Ibut with shame confess that for onco lin my life I came very near "white- eyeing" at the inaugural banquet, for 1t broke all records for length since pro- ihibtion went into effect lAsting nearly six hours, five of them being consumed in oratory Of every variety.
 This is not sour grapes on my pert for