New Ulm review., 1921-03-02
A Merger
BY FREDERICK CLARKE


Miss Agatha Browne was thirty-five
and looked older. She had been pretty
when she was a girl-that could easily
be seen from the regular contour of
her face, her soft, clear skin, and the
gray eyes which even her detractors
allowed would be beautiful if she did
not hide them behind those hideous
round spectacle lenses. Miss Agatha
Browne was professor of economics at
ledham seminary, which. as most
people know, receives only selected
girl pupils from among the first fami-
lies of the South.
Prof. Sampson Boylett instructed
the same select young ladies in Ro-
man history. The young ladies of Led
ham seminary might have been seen
with their heads very close together
one evening after the professor had
concluded his lecture. He had been
expounding "The Marriage Customs of
the Samnites."
Mustn't it have been dreadful in
those days!' said Miss Philippa Clark,
reading from her notebook. 'Just
think! Among the Samnite ladies it
was not an uncommon thing to take
the initiative in the proposal of mat
rimonial alliance. When gentle glances
and hints failed to accomplish their
purpose the Samnite woman did not
hesitate to address herself openly to
che backward suitor."
"Dreadful?" exclaimed Miss Mary
Campbell, one of the most select Of
the young ladies. "Why, it was grand"
Professor Boylett appeared unusual
~ preoccupied on the second day aft
erward
Er-one moment, ladies'" he began
as the class waited it's dismissal. "Can
anyone tell me whether there is a-er
--any attache Of this institution whose
initials are A. B.?"
"Miss Agatha Browne, professor OF
economics" chanted the class. And
the professor, after staring speechless-
ly at them for an instant, suddenly
bolted through the door.
At that instant Miss Browne was
saying:
"a most insulting thing has hap
pened to me, girls. I hesitate to men,
tion it, and should not, did I not fear
IT is some unworthy member Of this
seminary. I have received an anony
NOUS letter containing-in short,
proposal Of marriage"
'Oh, no, Miss Browne!' exclaimed
the class in horror.
ladies, your attitude does you
credit" said the professor Of econo-
mics. "Er-by the way, is there any
person connected with this seminary
whose initials are S. B.?"
"Prof. Sampson Boylett," shouted
the class in economics in unison.
Then an extraordinary thing hap
pened. Behind Miss Brownies large
gpectacles a reddish hue, arising in
the neighborhood of either ear, spread
and expanded until it completely COW
cred her face.
"Dear me-, this is very painful !''
purmured Miss Browne 'The class
iS dismissed"
The class, released from its duties,
rushed to the windows and looked out
upon the campus. 1t saw Miss Browne
emerge from the portals of the fa-
NOUS institution of learning with
hurried and yet furtive step, if such a
term could be applied to any quality
or attribute of Miss Browne. With
her umbrella folded in her hand, the
professor of economics picked her way
down the gravelly walk toward the en-
trance. Then the class and Miss
Browne simultaneously perceived
second figure, bent, irresolute, mid
dle-aged figure approaching the same
portals from the classroom in Roman
History.
And then occurred peculiar phe-
nomenon such as had never been
known to happen during the memory
Of the class. For Miss Browne, instead
Of continuing upon her resolute way
toward the gate, made short cut
across the soggy grass-Miss Browne,
whose state Of health was always
Known to be exactly commensurate
with the hygienic condition Of her
cvershoes.
And, as an immOvable body encoun-
ters an irresistible force, so Miss
Agatha Browne encountered Professor
Roylett beside the portals of the Led
ham Seminary for Young Ladies. The
professor saw her, Strengthened him
self, and spoke.
"Er-among the Samnites there ex-
listed custom"-he began.
II have always told my Glass;" Miss
Browne remarked at the same mo-
l1ient, "that the custom which re-
strains the female half Of the COM
munity-"
(which would be the last to con-
demn-"
From taking the first step"
"When hints and gentle glances
fhiled-''
Leading toward the marriage con,
tract
ITO effect matrimonial proposition
-er-"
."Oh, professor !" exclaimed Miss
Agatha, and could say no more.
Inside the seminary there was a
great hustle at this moment.