davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
SveÌŒt = World. [volume] (Cleveland, Ohio) 1911-1939, 1921-11-25
RANNf NAVSTEVA "
KLUBU.
Posvfcenska vystoupenf cleve-
landskych lupi6I.

Clenstvo The Eagle Klubu,
1926 vych. 55. ul. uspofadalo
We stredu tanecni pfedposvi-
censkou zabavu po skonceni
teze byl vlozen prijem ma
vstupntm vynos SHREK as
$1,000 do pokladny, kterou Sc
uvolil po zbytek noci hlidati
policejni straznik H. Hearn,
jenz jest souGasn6 clenem i've
dene organisace. Setrvali V
mistnosti spolu dohlizitelem
klubu w. r. Blecherem az do
z. hodiny ranni. Blecher pred
tim Sc odebral do horejSi mist
nosti, ably vzbudil portera a
vratil Sc ia chvili k Hearnovi.
Pojednou zaslechli kroky, ale
domnivali Sc, re jest to vzbu-
Zeny zfiZenec. Pojednou sc
vsak otevrely zadni dvere a
vstupovali diva maskovani a o.
zbroieni mladici as 20 az 25le-
ii. Spatrili vSak jen Blechera,
ielikoz Hearn sedel V lenoSce a
zustal vetrelcGm utajen. Poru-
cili 81, ably dal Blecher ruce
vzhuru, kdyz pojednou straz-
nix vytrhl sevolver casne no.
sty tim ma sebe upozornil. Tito
&c vSak nezalekli a pocali stTf-
lett, ma St6sti vsak panu bohu
do oxen, posleze Sc dali ma ry-
chly ustup a uprchli touze ce-
stou, kterou byli pTiSli - ok
nem zadni mistnosti. Jeden 2
Mich ztratil pfi tom revolver.
Die klubovnich ufednikG byli
neuSpeSni lupiGi patrn6 velice
dobfe obeznameni Sc spolkovy
mi mistnostmi. Ia vcerejsf no.
ci navstiveny byly ma Prospect
Ave. lupici diva reznicke obchc
dy, The Cleveland Pocking Co
els. 419 a E. ID. Schrimmer V
els. GA, V prvnejSim ukofistili
1926 a V druhem as 5000.
SveÌŒt = World. [volume] (Cleveland, Ohio) 1911-1939, 1921-11-25
ZENA UZILA v SEBEOBRA
NE REVOLVERU.

32-leta pani Minnie Eakino-
va. 1860 vych. 9. ul. Sc ma po-
licii priznala, re We stredu "a
povstale hadky V apartment
MIN dome t6ze adressy stfelila
42-leteho georgia Sackise. Ku.
lie zasahla krcni tepnu, takze
postfelenv vcera V Huron ne,
mocnici skonal. Die vlastni jei
vypovedi naSla pry revolver l
sv6ho pfibuzn6ho a zbrant
pouzila toliko V nutne sebeo
bran6. Pro Gin vyslychan by
policii Sol Laurie, mattel The
Central Athletic Clubu, 724
Hamilton Ave-, byl ale vcers
SveÌŒt = World. [volume] (Cleveland, Ohio) 1911-1939, 1921-11-25
NALEZENA KRKAVCf
MATKA.

V Lakeside nemocnici male
Iii vcera detektivove matku no
vorozenete, jez bylo objeveno
We stfedu rano Y zadu domu G
1926 Euclid Ave. Robe bylc
nalezeno dplne nah6 a vzdol
peel lekaru a oSetrovatelu' re.
mrelo vcera nasledkem VISTA
veni chladu. Matka byla Wy.
slechnuta policejnim inspekto
rem Sterlingem priznala Sc
re dala zivot decku V budov{
nedaleko kter6 bylo nalezeno
Cely pripad bude dnesniho do
poledne pfedan policejnimu zs
lobci.
SveÌŒt = World. [volume] (Cleveland, Ohio) 1911-1939, 1921-11-25
NOVA "ZNAMKA" VRACE-
JlCf Sc PROSPERITY.

Klerk Y Statlerov6 hotelu je
pfesv6dGen, re Sc nam vraci O.
desly blahobyt, soudi TAX o.
kolnosti, re Sc v hotelu ubyto-
valo ycera 0 posviceni 19 par
kG novomanzelskych. Kdyz byl
tazan, iak re poznava, re by
parky byly noVomanzele, Wy
pray6l, ze sc tito st'astlivci pro
zrazuji sami, jsou sama po-
zornost jeden k druh6mu, da-
ma jest pravidelne krasne u
pravena a re satd il obyCejne
pada rye, kterou die zvyku by
va nev6sta svatebnimi hosty o.
stfelovana. A dolozil, re pfece
nekdo Z t6chto parkG musi mi
ii n6jakou praci, kdyz ma ma
podnikani svatebni cesty dosti
pen6z.
Nam Sc MEDIA, re by byl do
tycny klerk dobrym pozorova-
telem, neb nevi ami, ze clov6k
ziiici 2 prace rukou svych So
tya 81 muze dovoliti slavit IL
banky V nakladnem hotelu.
SveÌŒt = World. [volume] (Cleveland, Ohio) 1911-1939, 1921-11-25

y hlavni policejni stanice po
priznani prave pachatelky pro-
puSt6n.
SveÌŒt = World. [volume] (Cleveland, Ohio) 1911-1939, 1921-11-25
DiVKA NEBEZPECNE IRA
NENA POL. AUTEM.

UJizdejicim policejnin au-
tenn byla vcera vecer ma Vych.
II. ul. a Superior Ave. zasaze-
na yazne zranena 22-leta sle-
cna Marian Lindova, 1876 Su-
perior Ave. Byla dopravena do
Lakeside nemocnice, kde leka-
ii shledai, re ma rozrazenou
lebecni kost. Ride auta byl
yelice svedomitym, ably "a
chranil divku, uhnul stranou
tax prudce, re stroj prevratil
a vyklopil slavnou policH ma
dlazbu.
SveÌŒt = World. [volume] (Cleveland, Ohio) 1911-1939, 1921-11-25
NEHODA KAZDYCH DIVA
GET MTNUT.

New York, "a. list. Nehoda
udala sc kazdych dvacet mi
nut ma newyorskych ulicich
b6hem minuleho roku. Celkem
sb6hlo Sc 1850 nehod pfi vo2
be vseho druhu, V nichz 864 0.
soby byly zabfty; poran6no by
10 1913 muzu a 6,146 zen.
SveÌŒt = World. [volume] (Cleveland, Ohio) 1911-1939, 1921-11-25
MANZELSTVf MA ZKOUSKU

Vesela fraska pbdfadnym
titulem Cerna ruka Praze,
kterou napsal pro pobaveniI
nejsirSich vrstev lidovych Ru-
dolf Mark, sehrana We vcerej-|
81 posvicensky den dram. sbo-
rem Tyl ' Cesk6 Narodni SIM
Ma Broadway a yykonala w
borne svoie poslani, iez vyvr-
choluje jedine We smichu. Bylo
tolik veseli, re bylo az ma "a
yadu V n6kterych mistech SOU
hre. Posviceni ma iiste svoje
pravo a nevime, proc by neme-
10 byti Casem sahnuto k podob
|nym rozmarnIm fraskam, KITE
re ovSem vaznejsi kritiky ne
snesou. Del jest sice hodne O.
trely. ale pusobi, predstayte 81
kominika, iehoz milenka nese
Istopy ieho tern6ho milovani ne
jen ma tvafi, ale i na zast6rce
a tim sob6 asi predstavite, co
Ivyvolavalo prave salvy smichu.
Veselym scenam nikterak vsak
Sc nerovnaly zp6vnf vlozky,
iez nebyly ami melodicke, ba
ami ne vkusne. Nejvice Sc ODE
censtvu zamlouvala skupina
hodne zkarikoyanych venkova.
nj. iimz byl natelnikem Mattel
Vohnout, starosta z NamrZle
Lhoty, pfedstaveny vyborme
panem Kratochvilem, jenz wee
ia op6tn6 jednou rozdovadel
syui humor V neipiilehaveiSieh
jeho 1lohach uplatnovany. X
nemu druzili Sc ostatni uCinku-
liici sice vesmes Sc zdarem.
Hralo Sc chuti a hra Sc vetSi-
ne libila. Pocetnym 1loham do
stale Sc nasledovniho zastou-
peni: FrantiSek KabelaG, mezi-
narodni Zapasnik, p. f. Hart
man; Ella, jeho chot', pi. Ruz.
Vokounova; Eda Pokorny,
pravnik, ieji bratr, p. A. Xii
mes; Jan Roubal, uTednik, p.
s. Matyas; Anna, jeho zena,
pi. A. TeXleroya; Rudolf, stu
dent, jeiich syn, p. O, Nieder-
le; mocenc kratina, kupec z
JiGina, p. V. Kavan; Matylda
ieho zena, pi. 4. Srs1ova; Kla-
IA, ieiich dcera, pf. B. Peli-
chova; Barca, zena Vohnouto-
va, pi. M. Bazilova; Mudr. Ka-
rel Vohnout, ieiich syn, p. v
| Dlouhy; Hon2ik Povfislo z Ma.
mrzle Lhoty, p. V. Vejlupek
Anci, jeho zena, pi. M. Maza-
ma: R6zi, sluzka u Kabelacd
tpi. A. Riedlova; Alois Petrmou
; SEX, kominik, p e. Pelich. Fras-
ku nacvitil dostatecnou pee
, fiditel sboru p. AL. Klimes.
Pro milovniky vazn6jsi dra
, matick6 tvorby chysta sbor na
: 2 hlayni policejni stanice pc
nTiZnani nrava nachata11,v nro
SveÌŒt = World. [volume] (Cleveland, Ohio) 1911-1939, 1921-11-25
SCHUZE CSI.. MAR. RADY.
Zahajena We stredu dopolednc
a skonGera v tyz den.


dopolednf zahajena byla pred
sedou, DR.. J. P. Pecivalem,
schuze Ceskoslovensk6 Narod-
nj Rady V Cesk6 Narodni SIM
Ina Broadway. V Rad6 zastou-
peny jsou organisace: Ceskoslo
venske Narodni Sdruzeni, Ma
rodni Svaz KatolIku a Sloven-
ska Llga, 2 nichz podavany
zprayy.
Ia Narodni Sdruzeni refero
vail PIP. Pecival a Musil, kte4
Sc zmihovali o vyprav6 do
Czech a pffpravach pro Sized
Sdruzeni, jenz zahaien bude V
sobotu Chicagu. Jak jiz jsme
Sc zminili We stfedecnim Gisle,
DR.. Pecival pfinesl a odevzdal
vyznamenani, jichz Sc Rad6 a
organisacfm nj zastoupenym
dostalo cd ceskoslovenske Via
dy ia jejich cinnost osvobozo-
vaci.
Ia Mar. Svaz Ceskych Kato-
liku podaval obSirnou zpravu
p. Jan Straka, jenz Sc zmino-
val ruznych akcich a podni-
cich t6to organisace a ia Slot
venskou Ligu referoval p. /
van Bielek.
Mezi obdrzenymi dopisy
cten a zivou pozornost a deba-
tn vyvolal omen cd SvaZu Le-
gionafd Chicagu, V n6mz "a
dano, ably Rada vzdala Sc sve
kontroly mad fondem, ktery
Legionarum sv6ho casu veno-
vala. Zadosti t6to nebylo vyho-
veno, jezto dozor Narodni Ra-
dy mad onim fondem uznan "a
zadouci.
Dosti tasu vyzadalo 81 iedna
mi o zalezitosti zasilek do Czech,
/ Y nichZ n6kter9 npd0SlV SDraV-
ne neb byly poSkoZeny a ne
kterych pripadech Vykradeny
Il usneseno, ably v6c tuto vyfi-
zovala ceskoslovenska vlada
/ prostfednictvim svych zdejSich
konsulatu, jezto slibila vesti
dozor mad rozeslanim beden Y
Ceskoslovensku. Panu A. Klie-
row vzdan dix "a jeho praci,
kterou 81 wal s roztrid ovanim
zasilek Praze a resoluce tato
ma byti zanesena do protokolu.
Jednano o reorganisaci Ma
rodni Rady a zvolen vybor,
ienz 81 to ma wit ma starost.
Odporuceno, ably o spolupuso-
beni pozadani byli redaktori
Gasopisd a duveryhodne oso-
by, V ruznych mistech, jez by
! predkladali Rad6 RUNE zalezi
tosti, spadajici do oboru jeji pG
sobnosti a Rada by pax o mich
roZhodovala.
Zyolen tiskovy vybor, jenz S
veZme ma starost zasilanl Zpray
z Ameriky do "Naseho zahra
Inici", ma jehoz kazdom6sicnt
Ivydavani, ma misto ctvrtletn6
Sc pomySli. Rovn6z tento vybol
ma vejiti We spojeni s odbocka,
mi Narodni Rady Y Praze !
Bratislave.
ku koncl zaSedanlm Jedna
no prosebnych zadostech M
RUNE podniky Ceskosloven
sku, iimiz jsou zahrnovanS
zdejsi spolky Gasopisy a u
sneseno pozadati, jak Narodn
Radu V Praze, tax zahrani6n
ministerstvo, ably to hledely
omeziti.
Schuze mela klidny prdbel
a k veGeru zastupci zmin6nycf
tri organisaci V pfatelsk6 sho
: de Sc rozeSli.
NALEZENA KRKAVCf
The Washington times., 1921-05-04
MAY 4, 1921
The District "Surplus" Is
No Myth
By BILL PRICE.

Senator CARTER GLASS; former Secretary of the
Treasury and for member of the House. makes
plain fact generally accepted in the Senatethat the
Surplus" Of the District of Columbia, in the Federal
Treasury, is no myth, but actual reality.
Even in the House, where the fiscal relations between
the District and Federal governments long created
tention there should likewise be question this point
AS Senator Glass clearly explains these funds
cumuated in the Treasury under specific contract between
the Federal and District governments They not
expended appropriations 1t may be true that the
than 100000 paid by District people part of their
tract and turned to the Treasury not labeled Cd
c. Money! but the fact remains that until Congress
Gently placed the fiscal relations 6040 basis the old
$3.50 basis was legally and fairly in existence.
The Senate shows strong disposition to regard this
surplus rgheously available for all District purposes
and specially for the large expenditures necessary to put
District public schools basis fit for the and daugh
ers of Senators and Congressman and of poor in civil
life to attend and derive the full benefits they entitled
to young Americans.
1t is widely recognized in the House, too that the
District schools must have prompt attention to bring them
up to standard existing in other cities where there is not
legislative bubble technicaltes and where the first
thought of ALL the people, out of public lfc is the
thorough education of their young
Even Congress to feel that the District has been
footbaed long enough in that body and the disfanchsed
local public earnestly believes the Congress going
to saddle extraordinary local expenditures upon taxpayers
whose is already lying unexpended in the Treasury
The Washington times., 1921-05-04
\
William Anterior Du Puy-

Tho Republican who got himself elected to
Congress from Texas Harry NJ Wurzbach. in
troduced another novelty in politics about which
the veterans are wondering.
He campaigned his distriet after the election
was over. He held series OF rallies that he
might thank the voters for what they had done
for him.
better audiences than during the prediction
days. Wurzbach preached his gospel to them,
why they should, vote for him two years hence.
The experiment was great success. 1t is
strange that 1t should seem so pew.. ....,..
How would you like to have the responsibility
for everything being in proper form in an
ganization punctilious and as important
the State Department?
Well there are two young women in that de-
partment who read every letter that anybody.
from the Secretary to the modest division chief.
writes. They Miss Margaret Hannah and
Mrs. Ruth B. Shipley.
II one OF these letters is not couched in proper
diplomatic Language, II all the amenities are not
observed IL precedence is not given its proper
place, IL policy is indicated that is not the ex
pressed policy OF the department-swish. swish,
goes the big blue pencil and the letter is re-
turned to the writer.
Mere secretaries and assistant secretaries who
come and go with the Administrations, may in
dulge in faux pas and then. but not
these women cars Of official correspondence
lives hundreds of feet below the level of the sea.
but he walks with his head in the clouds
His name is Phil ID. Swing, and his home Is IN
Imperial Valley, Cal. He looks like a boy. but
he has been judge in his own home town. He
is now Representative in the Congress Of the
United States.
In that great stretch Of desert in the South
west, Imperial Valley has become an oasis OF
astounding fertility. Under present conditions
the amount of land that may be irrigated is linn
tied for most Of the water that falls on the
watershed of seven States that drain into the
Colorado river runs to waste at flood season. goes
- sea without having served any usefAl
purpose.
. Swing sees the vision of a dam across
the Colorado a hundred miles below the Grand
Canyon. 1t would stop the floods. create
land sea that could be drawn upon at will IL
would furnish water to transform millions Of
acres of this desert sand, would generate electric
power to supply an unborn empire. 1t would
yerform the miracle on a stupendous scale that
already has been wrought in twenty places in
miniature
The Governments reclamation engineers say
the plan is practicable. Its carrying out would
cost the taxpayer nothing. The lands reclaimed
would be bonded for the cost The Government
would be asked to go on their note and supervise
the spending of the money, nothing more.
. This boy Congressman says he will accomplish
this in years resign.
Copyright 1921 by ublc Ledger Coz
The Washington times., 1921-05-04
A MINUTE WITH MILO Fl.

One of the first nuts to con-
tribute to II and S was MILO III.
He's great mixture of kindly
heart, sympathetic understand
ing and real nuttiness.
There came from MILO today
fat envelope containing con-
tribs. and its only address was:
POSTWAR!
Take me to that nutty place,
with welcome" on the
doormat.
The postmsn did his duty.
Inside, among other things,
was wrapped a new penny, which
the contrib asks be the beginning
of a fund to buy the editor a
new Panama hat, no contribution
to be over I cent.
That's a pleasing tribute TO the
editor, but he couldn't well spon-
sor a contribution of that sort
So. many thanks, contrib.
And MILO writes pleasant
greetings to Columniers who
have gone to distant lands, but
still ind good cheer In The Times
and II and S. He concludes:
Riddles! Gone To the earth's ends,
We have not forgotten you, our friends,
whether stranded, or bravely doing dut,
We send you one glad smile, although II
nutty.
The Washington times., 1921-05-04
No Hurry
About Dying
4 YOUNG MAN jumped from a
"a high bridge and killed MIN

4 YOUNG MAN jumped from
"a high bridge and killed MIN
= = self, saying in his farewell
letter that he was failure, and Life
was not worth while.
A large percentage of the worlds
subsequently successful men have
thought about doing the same, but
fortunately have not jumped. Ma
poleon thought seriously of suicide.
Youth passes through various
phases of detection. First it
imag.nes ITSELF failure. Then it
imagines the UNIVERSE a failure
and decides that it could have done
better. Usually it lives on patiently.
controlled by the wisdom that wound
it up originally. 1t lives to learn
that things are right, or nearly so.
1t is probable that Of those that
jump, and throw away their chances.
many possess the intense feeling that
might later have been changed to
success.
Never be in a hurry to die, for
that is something that you will not
miss.
The Washington times., 1921-05-04

NOTHING TO THE THEORY.
There's nothing to the Elasticity
theory OF DR.. INCONSISTENT. when
put to scientific analysis ii falls flat.
Any bootlegger knows it, too. That
eminent authority, DR.. Lie r UP,
finds that a gallon of bootleg, deliv-
cred in the original container. will
positively not measure a gallon. IL
Elasticity were correct II would be
different. DR.. REINWEIN.
I am undecided whether the MOON
SHEIN or DR.. LATE theories. as print
ed by you. should be taken internally
or externally. and IL so how much
and where? The point in the whole
theory is: Could the sun be sentenced
for making moonshine. even though
H. reflect on us. or would the elias
ITCHY of the lunar beams call for .
verdict of not guilty?
Z. PLURIBUS BUNKUM.
Most sublime secrets are developed
in the new theory of the "Consan-
guinity of Elasticity" The doctrine is
incomprehensible until you have mas
tered the ELASTIC KEY. This grand
philosophical conception is made
available in tabular form because
your undeveloped mind can more
readily assimilate such a methodical
exposition of the elementary con-
stituents. For centuries investiga-
ton of the "Consanguinity OF Elias
ITCHY" was hampered by humanity's
inability 80 comprehend the casual
elements, thus making the cogigation
OF the Totally and Coexistent
Schemata of Elasticity (of which you
will soon be familiar) beyond the
range OF reason. Now my ELASTIC
KEY places all knowledge within
your reach. l have hesitated to pub
lish this subtle secret to the common
world, but in the interests of human
ity I am now herewith revealing my
revolutionary discovery. Behold:
ABCDEFGHIJ
kLM MOP
QRsTUvwNYZ
ALAAM BEYMEER
The Washington times., 1921-05-04

AN nv AMI I'm ANNA
AND, IN MEN TO DETER ANY Enc
MES FROM ATTACKING US OR VIC.
TORIOUSLY TO DESTROY THEM If
THEY DO ATTACK U.s."
Citizens and friends, this editorial
was written nearly six years ago. Ask
yourselves if every word is not as true
now as it was then.
We were all told by the victorious
allied governments that henceforth the
old diplomacy, the old imperialistic
greed, the old muitaristc arrogance,
and all those evil things which had
brought so much woe upon the world
were to be things of the past; that
henceforth the weak peoples of the
world were to be as safe to live their
own lives as the strong peoples.
Now look at the pages of your daily
paper. Read the dispatches which come
in a stream from Europe telling of in
vaSionS, conquests, subjugations, re-
bellions, of. slaughter and famine, ST IL
the miseries of the tormented, despair
ing peoples.
Count the men under arms and see
how they outnumber the armies which
were marshaled in the summer of 1914.
See how democracy, instead of be-
ing safe everywhere in the world is
safe nowhere 10 the world. See how
every declaration published to the
world by the responsible heads of the
victorious governments has been re-
pudiated, how every pledge has been
broken and how all the smooth words
of the various chancelleries have
proven to be simply lies.
The impossible and preposterous pro-
gram for Supergovernment of the
world which our former President took
to Paris had no curative effect at all
upon the constitutional disease of civil
ization, which is the long-eStabliShed
and wholly evil system of diplomacy
that made the world a slaughterhouSe
during the six past tragic years.
These policies and the men who be-
lieve in them and act upon them are
just as much in force today as they
were when we warned you against them
six years ago. and we would be false to
every obligation of citizenship and every
obligation of American journalism if we
did not reiterate that our only security
lies in maintaining a navy that can de-
fend both our coasts against the attack
of any combination of powers-because
the imperialiStic and militaristic designs
of the German and the Austrian empires
were different in no way from the i'm
periaistic and miltaristic designs of the
governments which overthrow those EN-
pires.
In far greater degree than we
were six years ago we are the richest
nation and the most desirable spoil that
the world has ever seen, and if we do
not keep our defenses strong enough,
both by land and by sea, to beat down
any attack that may be made upon us,
we will become the spoil of these i'm
periaistic robbers in Paris and in Lon
don and in Tokyo, just as surely as the
sun will rise tomorrow morning.
The new Congress has already taken
up the naval program and the aviation
program Little Americans and little
navy men, we always have with us.
But we count on this Republican Con-
gresS to continue the great naval build
ing plan already authorized and to in
crease our air forces We do not need
a great standing army, but we do need
and must have a mighty navy.
The Washington times., 1921-05-04
WEST WIRGINNY.

The noses newhere bloom so red
As In West Wirginny.
The "moonshine" nowhere Kills so dead
As in West wirginny.
The birds" sing down there "on their
feet"
And nowhere hearts so slightly" beat
For flowers and earth are piled up neat,
Down In West Wirginny.
The graves are never quite 50 new,
A. In West Wirginny
Nor quite SO hlled with me an you,
As in West wirginny.
SO when my time has come to die,
Just take me back and let me lie,
Close by the still nlled with mashed ~
Down in West Wirglnny.
HARrERs FERRY.
The Washington times., 1921-05-04
Stars and Stripes

They who invite misfortune with impa-
thence entertain it with impotence.
Disputes are usually contests between
two men in error to ascertain which one of
them harbors tie greater
liar is never wise, for truth Is the
heart of wisdom.
Talent is but general ability, commanded
by its superior, private industry.
A crouch is fellow who complains OF
the bitterness of life, but docs nothing to
stir the sweets at the bottom Of his cup.
The Washington times., 1921-05-04

Suppose express train
passes pump. Relatively.
suppose pump passes express
train. Simple. That brings
in three more equations.
Never judge depth of we'll by
length of pump handle. Com
pare u. S. with Saraha
desert. Horrible, but true.
The Washington times., 1921-05-04

Income tax eats into in
come like worm into leaf.
Ultimate consumer doesn't
consume. Statistics show
that there IL per capita
wealth OF sixty dollars in
u. s. Tell that to hobo on
park bench. He will put an
egg on your skull that will
increase per capita lump per
person. You've got sixty
until you try to SPEND II.
That's per capita RELATIVELY.
The Washington times., 1921-05-04

In a Shine Emporium" the
other afternoon, where the mo-
tive power is a battery of keen
eyed pickaninnies. one OF the lit
tie scamps was overheard whis-
pering to another who was pol
ishing the trilbies OF rather
grouchy-looking patron: Oats
de crust whut don't nebber hand
out no tips. Glib his corns hell :"
" c.
The Washington times., 1921-05-04
A DRAMATIC SENSATION.

A great dramatic sensation II due
In Washington. The Film Elan
Film company OF Swampoodle. d. c. =
Is about to put on that greatest q:
all dramas. He Was Engaged to a
Girl with Wooden Leg, But He
Broke 1t on c. II. n
The Washington times., 1921-05-04

F'r Einstance-suppose we
have thimbleful of smoke.
Science knows that IL bear
chases man around tree long
enough that eventually bear
will think man is chasing
him and become frightened.
That's mental relatively.
The Washington times., 1921-05-04
THE HIDDEN AUTOMOBILE.

The hidden automobiles in the SEN
fences of Uncle Bob" were as follows
in each sentence:
1. King. Cleveland. Briscoe.
9. Cole, Davis, and Oakland.
8. Essex, Ford and bort
Stanley. Kissel Car and Pullman.
Correct answers were given by
EAGLE" "OIMNOT." wicked
EYES" PIGGY" CHOCOLATE and
VANILLA" "CRACkERJACK." NET
TIE W."
II. SMITH and others find that the
flowers in the anagram of MARY
ANNE were petunia. geranium.
honeysuckle, gardenia, sweet pea. vio-
let, aster, anemone, clematis. mignon-
cite.
The Washington times., 1921-05-04
What the Plimsoll Mark Is.

The Pltmsoll mark Is the line placed the
side OF every vessel to indicate to what depth she
may be loaded In salt water. Samuel rlimsol
from whom the name was taken, interested him !
self In the condition OF the mercantile sailors life
The Washington times., 1921-05-04

After Theoretically sealed
silence of eight years, Colonel
House has begun to talk. II
he had spoken when we
wanted to hear him, he could
have remained silent now.
Diplomatic RELATIVELY.