The Monett times., 1921-04-08

|
ceeded to have the time of his life; so
| much so that he was constantly over
| whelmed with wonder at his stupidity
! in not having become taXi-driver
years before! 1t should be remem-
bered that Mr.. Randolph was of New
York Yorky; he knew everybody cas-
ually, from Mr.. Milyuns and his
| daughter, Eileen, down to the latest
| addition to the pitiful ranks Of the
midinette. More than that, so broad
was his acquaintanceship that as a
sporting gent he had once or twice
been tipped off as to the where and
when Of proposed gun-play.
In addition to being by right of birth
an Integral part Of all the social strata
of Manhattan, he knew the surface of
the island and of the adjacent COM
moner soil of the mainland cOnsid-
erably better than he knew the palm
of his own hand. In fact, he could
scarcely ever have been conscious that
he had palm, even as map of per-
sonal fortune; for he who is complete
ly satisfied with the present never
worries about the future and Mr. Ran
dolph had been born content.
With such an equipment, is it to be
wondered at that he found the taxi
field rich with unexpected and sur
prising blooms? Fair flowers, he had
known heretofore to nod only over tea
tables and solid silver appeared sud
denly transplanted to his cab and
ready to nod on stalwart shoulder
Strong male tiger-liies of the money
market, grated to the cushions of
taxi, became complacent pillars upon
which some clinging ivy twined.
In six nights he learned the sound
that banker makes when slender
fingers tickle him under the chin; the
gasp of girl, first-kissed; the cry of
young man upon discovering the alb.
sence of grandfathers gold watch, his
since graduation day; the cluck Of q
top-hat fairly sat upon in the excite
ment of moment that else would
have been tragic, the exasperating tap,
tap, tap, Of hen-pecking tongue that
explained and eondoned murder mys-
terry in the next mornings papers, and
the sob of ruined youngster who had
played with borrowed money.
All these incidents took place with
people whom Mr.. Randolph knew or
knew of and just to show what an ex-
tremely honest young man he was, let
1T be said that it did not once occur to
him that he need never be poor while
humanity. supposedly in good stand
ing, continued to lay itself open to
blackmail at the rate Of case night.
At the same time, he was not stupid
and occasionally tapped out missive
loaded with dynamite on the garage
typewriter when no one was around.
Here Is a sample.
"Mr. Poindexter MacGuler, Sir: AS
I was driving you and Miss B. B.
larst night who was foster-mothered
by an aunt Of friend of friend of
mine, heerd you talkin to her and
all I got to say is If I see you out
with her again short of the bands of
matrimony I'll get another friend of
mine to get Mr.. Robert Herv Ran
dolph to tell what he knows about
you cheaten at cards on Dec. % last" !
Nights that gave birth in the morn
ing to such illiterary tit-bits could
scarcely be called dull, but it was not |
long before Mr.. Randolph found him.
self threatened by an unexpected mo-
notonous employment. Unfortunately |
for his entertainment, his reputation |
as the one par excellence st. Bernard |
lifesaver to the inebriate elite spread ,
rapidly throughout the Force so that |
the telephone was constantly burdened
during the wee hours with the follow
ing: "Say, is Slim Hervey on the job?
Well, when he comes in tell I'm 1 got
another tailor-model drunk here what
has lost his home address from his
mind"
With suspicious suddenness Mr..
Randolph proceeded to forget half his
school and eliminates and cold-blooded-
" leave them to their fate and
night out, not without coming to grief
on at least one occasion, however.
What are you comm over me?" de-
manded the irate captain of the Nth
precinct. "You amt forgot that you
was vally to R. 81. Randolph for seven
years, have va? Has all his frens
gone on the wagon?"
1t looked like a loop-hole. "Sure."
said Slim Hervey promptly. "His
clubs near busted what with water
drinkers and softs."
Sounds kinda phony to me- said
the captain grimly. "considerin' YOU
took this same gent home a week ago
.ome Friday" !
did II" said Slim, and with feigned
managed finally to recognize
he mess Of evening clothes that was i
luddled on a nearby bench. you're .
light, Captain. He's drunker than | ,
,ver saw him before and besides, he's
vearin' a new set Of shirt-studs. Kind
# changed his looks"
Slim fingered. aLook here, he mur. Q
nured to the captain confidentially '
You're on to me, but just let me
whisper. I'm getting to be the deliv.