The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1921-04-19
Every Defonseless Telephone Pole Ought
t0 Re Shingled.

uuisitiye reporter as to the wisdom of Sam
Gompers second marriage do not throw much
light on the question. Arthur Brisbane says:
"A wise decision. A man should be married,
especially if he has important work to do"
But there is only one opinion We care for VIII
some ouija artist page Nat Goodwin?
TO REMITTANCE ROOMS. WITH PRIVATE
and adjacent baths, for two. Douglas 34ib.
Chicago Tribune
Douglas, Douglas. tender and true; a beau
tiful bathtub built for two!
a" BUT when a perfect stranger comes
along and asks me if | do my own washing,
reads one of Uncle Walt Mason's stories, i
feel that the line must be drawn somewhere.
We usually draw it between the back porch
and corner of the garage.
Where Have We Seen This Name Before2
From The Argus
In addition to relatives here. daugh-
ter NJ .shG.AG;;.; 7S90ETAOI
LICENSED to wed: Aline H. Robinson, An
dover, ILL.,. Ethel A. Scott, Andover. Ill
One never can tell what women will do next
YOU'RE A VERSATILE CUss, zEKE.
Sur: Mi hibrou friend held me ovir the coles,
so to speek. fer uzin tibet werd. weth which l
klozd over jint pome. He sed it want uzed no
moar amung periight peepul; the farmerz uzed
the werd "slop" instid, end eyin the masuns in
THAR unsekrit katakism he'd a kwestchun end
anser like this:
"a Wut il the furst dutie ov a master
masun?
A. To slop hiz hogz,"
Mi trend sed two tibet he thot mite do
bettur ez a flosofer then ez pote; so hear
goze:
The hite az a gurlz skurt IL in inverce
rashOw to the bite Nv her moralZ.
Who maiks the sille fashunz, the munnie
maxim man er the pride achin womun? N. B.
This IL verryashun ov the old kwestchun,
Which waz furst, the hen er the eg? (the gold
en- eg?D
Evry good man IL a preechur ov riteyusnis
by presept end exampul; f'instance, Theodore
Roosevelt. W. j. Bryan end Billy Mcintyre.
Plant erly. but don't fergit to saiv sum sead.
-ZEKE TRITERITE.
RUSSIANS Pay Horse For a Box Of
Matches Clinton Herald.
The horse. OF course, was broke (Rural
readers are authorized to smile at this.)
Unmasked, By HEX!
From the Sherrard Bulletin-l
man apprehended for speeding in
Rock Island q few days ago gave the
name of William Ferguson of Cable. 1t
is needless to say that is not his name,
and he lives in Sherrard instead of
Cable
TUT, TUT. SIR; AND AGAIN, TUT.
Sir: find others OF a far-fung and humor-
thirsty tribe who, like myself, are feeling more
and more the need OF their daily additions in
your own sequestered pool of aqua-cooled
thought. as the pipeline Of their only other
source Of supply appears nothing more than
a particularly Turing mirage on the horizon Of
their desert-scorched vision, instead of the
magic spring which they had expected would
replenish their once never-failing oasis A
mirage is particularly difficult thing L, shake
(much more 50 even than the shimmy) and
they do 1t with hesitancy, but certainty. and
with the uppermost instinct OF selt-preserya.
ton they turn from its deceptive charms TO lie
down at your trough: at first to drink the deem
draughts their parched innards crave, and then
to splash about in the happy Inconsistencies
of the OF Swimmin' Hole. We in this section
Of witless and niprless Saraha should breathe
cuI thanks for our geographical location. which
provides US with fount In whose waters we
MAJ drink and dive, and watch the ripples ecdy
away. What MUST BE the suffering Of those
less advaneaseously located! -ETEOCLES.
SPEAKING Of things Va should remember
but always forget 1t may not be too late TO tell
A. n. S. that his happy little lad" Who loves
dAndelions 10 wanted by friend OF ours whose
front yard contains moro Of the yellow bios.
SONS than his mantle Of affection will cover.
SOME padagogue two forget his name ~
oourse) once laid down the rule that "a prepo-
| sition ID q bad thing to end sentence with"
Altar noting tia effect At the last lima Of Yea.
tsfdsy's colyum On Tie L. W. D. Q. g.. Va ora,
this amendmant:
"A PROPOSITION is a bad thing to end !.
oolyum vata!s RENO.