The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1921-01-27

Ell when his mother reminded him thu
e he had not yet washed his Deck he re
q piled, Gee whiz, amt going :
3. wear > collarlv
:. The war was responsible for tn
= coming Of . number Of new words
= and now woman suffrage has addes
n another. 1t Is "legisladies" - apply
{, ing To the women members Of the leg.
b islature. In : few years "legislady'
2 win be in all the dictionaries.
A German farmer lost = calf. II
/ proved to have been stolen and the
e thief was caught and brought before
the court. At the trial the. farmer
. was put ON the witness stand: "Face
the jury" said the judge, "and tell
/ them what kind Of calf this was"
"Shentlemen Of the jury" said the
, old fellow. dds calf vas not 30 high
like fence, but more WIDER out"
i A young man entered drug store
and asked the clerk for medicine for
a cough. The clerk, who was mex
| perienced, but who desired to get /
credit for making sale, gave the /
customer bottle Of castor oil, box
Of casearets and vial Of croton oil.
Later he told the druggist about it.
"That won't stop his cough" said the
druggist. "Oh, yes it will" the clerk
replied, "He won't dare cough"
An Irishman recently went before
= recruiting sergeant who tried to
kid" him. Have you read the Dec
ehration Of Independence :" the SER
geant asked. II hov not" said Pat
Have you read the Constitution of n
the United States?" II hoy not, SIR" n
The sergeant look sternly at the APP 4
pIicant, and asked: what have you II
read7" Patrick hesitated but the U
fraction Of second before replying, "
i hov red hairs on me neck" q
1t was in country store some h
,ears back. A one-gallus customer W
lrifted in. Gimme nickle's worth an
4 assafoetida." The clerk poured W;
ONE assafoetida in paper bag and OF
ushed it across the counter. Charge an
>" drawled the customer. whats ha
our name?" asked the clerk. "Hon- m!
yfunkel." "Take it," said the clerk.
wouldn't write assafoetida and Da
Ioneyfunkel for five cents" The
by
The colored cook had night off be-
,use of the wedding of her niece. r.
he related the event to the wife: Ik4
irst the eatables, how good they Z
ere; then the people, such a crowd; "
md the bride, ma'am, you should a. =
en the bride, all in white, long veil II,
she looked beautiful" "And the lHH
'oom," asked the wife, "what did he lB
earl" With great disgust Mandy IHl
,swered, "You know, ma'am, that I .
} count niger never showed up" I'LL
They had just pulled the cork when MI
lantern entered the room, followed
lengthy individual with whis- Xxi
RS. "By gum, I've ketched ye,"
outed Whiskers, flashing the star
tached to his galluses. "What are
u two A-doin' here?" "N-nothing,"
lmmered Jones, GENEROUSLY glanc-
, at the bottle on the table.
nothing" echoed Smith, covetous-
glancing at the bottle on the table. I
fell, what are we two amin to I'LL
?" persisted Whiskers. "N-noth- lI
- said Jones. "N-nothing," said
18th. "Whee," said Whiskers.
hen hold this lantern" hi
Sir Auckland Geddes, the new Brit
ambassador at Washington, was
King at a luncheon in Philadelphia III
nut seasickness. "There are num-
us remedies for seasickness,p he n
]. "Some advise cotton in the
$; others recommend smoked glass
a champagne diet has its vota-
i; fasting has its advantages as
|; but l, for my part, however, in
e to the old shippers view. 'Oh,
tain moaned lady passenger, my
band is frightfully seasick. Can -
tell him what to do?' 1T amt
sssary to tell him, maam. He'll y
t. said the old skipper gruffly.'"
Q
visitor of schools giving the n
her little advice, referred to the
ortance Of associating historical
its with admonition. "For in
CO. he said, "there is an apt ex-
lie; Don't play with matches.
ember the Chicago fire. The
her was struck with the idea and
,sDed tn nut Il into onara4;on r-;,