The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1921-09-03

you were young. Whenever boy
puts up job on me, and feel my
self getting mad. recall some Of my
own exploits when ! wns lad. and
that enables me to forget my troubles.
II was looking through an ancient
album last evening, and saw the pie
lures of n lot of people who fell of
the earth many years ago. Thcy were
venerable men md women In my
schooldnys. and I had played tricks
on every one of them; not with nal
Ice aforcthought. but just because n
kid must have his fun.
There was n picture of old Aunt
Betsy, who used to come to our house
once In n while, on n visit, and as soon
as she came she took charge of every
thing. She knew how to do things
better than anybody else, and she WINS
always criticising my mothers meth
DDS. Whenever mother started to do
anything. Aunt Betsy would tnke the
lob out of her hands, saying she would
show the right way to do 1t.
~ had heard somewhere that If you
put II drop or two of acetic ncid In
gallon of cream. that cream VIII
never mike butter. i hnd greht
memory for such fncts. and kept them
on file where they would be useful.
one morning mother said she would
have to churn. and she got things
ready. knew that ms soon ms she
started Aunt Betsy would want to
show her how IT should he done. 80
when had II chance. ! dropped some
of the acid into the churn. which was
one of those old upright affairs, with
n daslhcr that you worked up md
down until the butter came.
Mother seated herself on n stool
and began churnIng, and then Aunt
Betsy came along, and snid that while
she wns n modest and unnssuming
woman. she did claim to know n lit
lie more about churning than anybody
of her weight in that part or the
country Let me do II. my dear said
she. and I'll have butter In seven
minutes by the clock SO she took
hold of the dashcr and began slnpplng
away with IT, She worked and worked.
and the sweat began rolling down her
face. and every once In a while she'd
lift the lid of the churn to sec what
allied the doggonc cream. and then
she'd pour in some cold water. ana
then some hot water, and the more
she wrcstlcd away. the less sign OF
butter was there.
"She whangcd away Mt TINT ding
busted churn for two hours ana
couldn't get results. and she wns so
mad and disgusted over 1t she want
ed to pack her trunk and 90 back
home. Mother saw me rolling around
In the yard all doubled up with I'M
holy mirth, and she realized ut once,
by dcductivc reasoning. that l wns
responsible. and the licking | got that
evening took the edge on my sense
of humor for three weeks.
"Another time. Uncle James was WIS.,
iting us. He used to sit in n rustic
chair under an apple tree and doZe'
after dinner. He had n. bald head,
and his hat always slid OFT nfter ne
had snorcd few times. One dny
sncaked up behind him with fenther
and began tickling his hend. Hed
slap his dome of thought and cuss
n little. and then doZc again. when
would get busy with the feather. rha'
went on for quite while. and ! was
having the time OF my life. l never
heard any language more highly col
orcd than Uncle james put up.
my mother heard him saying
things, and came to the door and asked
him what was the mntter. ana ne
said a dingdongcd lopsided fly was
chewing his scalp on. He had chased
1t away three million times. but II nj
WAYS came back. i got another lick
ing that night. and my mind was oc-
cupied with serious things Tor
month";"