davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1921-05-21
SUCH IS FAME

From the Montgomery Advertiser.
All the famous people are not in
Who's Who" and all the people who
are in it are not famous. For instance
Babe Ruth, George Kelly. John Nc
Graw and Jack Dempsey are not repre-
seEted in the columns of this valued
book. There are three Dempseys-
Elan Franklin, a Georgia preacher;
James Howard, an Ohio lawyer, and
stephen Wallace, New York lawyer
whose names with biographical
sketches, appear in the volume. But
William Harrison talias Jack) Demp-
sey. is not mentioned Yet he is a
wcrld figure, while the other three are
scarcely known beyond the confines of
their congressional districts.
Perhaps, however, the editors OF
Who's Who" take the position that
Jack Dempsey and Babe Ruth receive
quite sufficient publicity through
sporting pages, and that the neglected
men of less reputation are entitled to
have the score evened in some way.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1921-05-21
DERBY VS.. DARBY

From the Louisville Courier-Journal.
~ NE whose confusion arises per-
W haps from mountaineering Of
sufficiently wide range to cover
the boxes and the field at Churchill
Downs makes the following demand
upon the Courier-Journal
will you please say whether should
Whenever I go to the races l hear
both pronuncations.'
Why not reach decision upon the
basis Of what you call your hat, If
you wear that type Of hat, and for
ever afterward retain the courage of
your convictions If you are of mill
tant disposition? If yours is milder
nature and you would rather be SO
cially agreeable than statistically cor
rect" as Isabelle Carnaby advised all
persons to be If they would get on
socially, or il you are timorous. adapt
your pronunciation &c your audience,
being always careful to make no slip
of the tongue. A slip in one quarter
might cause you to be regarded as an
unenlightened. If not i'll educated, per-
son. In another quarter a slip would
cause you to be charged with affec-
tation.
The word derby is said by lexi =
cographers to have meant originally a
place Inhabited by deer. DRY" was
the Danish word for deer, and by or
"bu' meant habitation. The town of
Derby in England is called Darby"
The town in Connecticut bearing the
same name usually is called Derby
in America. George Horatio Derby,
author of 1.-THE Squibb Papers" was
an American and was not called Oar
by" The Encyclopedia Britannica men
tions the device known as mason's
derby as being a derby or darby
..Webster's international" says of the
race: "Durbi - In England usually
"darbi." the southern English pronun-
citation. The Century dictionary pro-
nounces the race Durby or Darby.
The race at Epson Downs was in
stituted by the Twelfth Earl of Derby.
The fact does not oblige an American
to use the English pronunciation.
Nothing obliges an American to avoid
the English pronunciation. The Eng
lishman who calls the race the DARBY
pronounces err similarly when he
calls clerk clark Somewhat
less frequent but not unheard. is the
pronunciation OF service" as ''sar-
vice" shrub known In America
.spplss sses u called the sarvices her,
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1921-05-21
UNKNOWN HERO" SPEAKS

the scene of action drew closer and,
near the end of the journey. fell down
in the bottom of the cannon and was
trod upon by his scornfful comrades.
In front line dugout, young Of
ficer, covered with decorations In
formed our hero in brief incisive tones
that he would not dishonor himself by
having him in his company and or
dered two soldiers to take the craven
to the rear. Our hero doesn't remem-
Der exactly what occurred save that
his escorts suddenly dived for cover
their example IL he had not been so
drunk that his wits failed to work
There was an explosion, and he died
hero's death. His great moment
came. he says when the august finger
Of his Britannia majesty pressed
button and two minutes of silence
reigned over Britain. That was, In
deed, a great moment. He had the
laugh on his caluminators; 1t was to
taught
Then follows this final, startling ad-
mission--the one that should make the
stones of Westminster crawl:
zone word more. I must add this to
my conscience that, although buried in
which I am in no way responsible.
Everyone knows that when the battle
surges on to new point, the bodies
are gathered up and buried in COM
mon grave, friends and enemies alike
Now I must tell you for the peace of
my conscience taht althugh buried in
venerable Westminster abbey, am not
an English soldier, nor a French SOL
der, nor an Italian soldier, nor a Bel
gian soldier, nor an American soldier,
nor any other ally of either color. To
tell the truth. I was horn in a city
near famous porcelain works, famous
for manufacturing tobacco pipes. It's
industry is both artistic and honest.
1t is an old town in Wurttemburg. In
fact, am German"
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1921-05-21
AII-cIub Field Day

The all-club field day to be held by
on May % promises to be one of the
most enjoyable affairs ever given, "
said Legrande S. Wilson. Commit
tees are arranging many games and
stunts that will take the men back to
their childhood and it is hoped that all
members of all local clubs will attend
the field day celebration at Camp An
drews. A barbecued dinner will be
secured their tickets are requested to
get them from the office of the re
spective clubs"
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1921-05-21
From the Kansas civ Star

From the Kansas City Star.
! NtUSEPPE YUCCA, an ironical
MI Italian, writing in II Messaggero
Rome, fixes upon the moving in
cident of the burial in Westminster
abbey of an unknown warrior and ex-
ercises his Latin imagination at the
expense of sentim entahsts He i'm
AGNES himself voice from the grave
the voice, in short, Of the unknown
warrior himself-and, In a candid
confession, tale unfo1ds that should
make the stones of the famous abbey
crawl.
The unknown warrior, then, relates
that when the war started he was 32
years old, an unknown attorney of a
most pacific disposition, practicing in
small way in a small town. Realizing
that he would eventually be called
upon to take up arms for his country
he resorted to the most violent physical
exercise in order If possible, to develop
some slight lesion which would re-
lieve him Of the unhappy necessity Of
oCi WINS at ln0 lTOHt. IN JnlS ne was
unsuccessful, but, fortunately, the in
speeding officers in his district CHANGED
to be his uncle, so that in the medical
reports he was designated as unfit
for service because of "a slight hernia
So the trying days went by and, in
time, our hero became known as the
principal Stacker of the district re-
ceiving the usual gifts of white
feathers and weathering, with the aid
of booze, the furious gusts of scorn
and contempt which his appearance
evoked.
The time came, however, when the
local inspecting officer was relieved by
an efficient stranger, and our hero
suffered sudden and miraculous cure
So he got himself into the dreaded
uniform and staggered TO the station
under the bitter fire of ridicule and
abuse which had become his daily por-
ton. He got drunken and drunken as
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1921-05-21
LUKE M,LUkE SAYS

She may not know it.. But 1t is a
waste of time for a girl to try to act
sentimental when she has been eating
onions.
kipling was wrong when he an
nourced that a woman is only WON
an. She is also an angel and even a
devil at times.
We do not know much. But we do
know that If you are healthy you have
mo kick coming.
This might be as good time as any
to inform the 1921 crop of graduates
that an undertaken is the only bust
ness man who has any use for q dead
one.
When mother beats the rugs, 1t
sounds like bricks falling on a tin
roof. But when father beats them it
sounds like pins falling on grass
You can be honest and you can be
polite. But there are times wfer you
can't be both at the same time.
1t may seem paradoxicaI. Blu the
fac. that SO few OF us lose our faults
its responsible for so much fault find-
ing.
The reason wife gets so tired 81
having her husband around the house
Is because she isn't willing to let him
go anywhere else.
The world may forget to give you
credit for what you do hut it y ont
forget to blame you for what vsu do
not do
No, Percival Painting the cwp red
isn't one of the cardinal virtue
Too many women seem to hMre an
idea that 1t isn't proper to shsk nds
with anyone If you mean It.
When a servant girl knows Has
place it is harder matter u set hes
TO keep. 1t.
Copyright. 1921.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1921-05-21

steady nerves, is cheap theatricalism.
1t is just another manifestation of
the callousness which made it pos
sible in the first place for the muir
derer to take a human life.
Most men who are executed die
calmly. A few, like Wade. show ex-
cessive bravado. 1t is no great dis
tinction thus to meet their doom at
the hands of the law. Perhaps some
think that dying game" in a. meas
ure makes amends for their lawless-
ness, but most Of them are prompted
by vanity. Having been weak, they
wish to appear strong. Having been
cowardly in the commission of crime,
they want their fellow prisoners and
the little group about the place of
execution to think they are made of
heroic stuff. 1t will look we'll in the
newspapers next day, and be a topic
of discussion for few days, per-
haps.
But such exhibitions. of brute in
difference do serve one useful pur-
pose. They make an execution less
trying on the nerves of the reporters
who have to be present as a matter
of duty, and not of their own choice,
and this task is little less arduous
for the man who springs the trap
or switches ION the electric current.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1921-05-21
Getting Rendx

The hotels at the springs SUNNI err
resorts near Birmingham are prepar-
ing for a big tourist season." said
James A. Carney deputy state hotel
inspector. Il have just returned from
an inspection of the hotels at Mentone,
Borden-Wheeler Springs and Pied
mont Springs and found them getting
in shape for rush. / found the hotels
In good shape and they are making
every effort to comply with the regu-
lations"
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1921-05-21
eAopKDaMlAa,psslH
LETTERS TO EDITOR
National Hospital Day

To the Editor of Thc Age Herald:
Please allow me to thank you for
your generous aid in making National
Hospital Day the success it was in Biz
mingham and Alabama.
This. the first national observance
of the anniversary Of the birth OF
Florence Nightingale. was originated
by Matthew o. Foley, managing editor
Of Hospital Management. and national
chairman.
10 him is due the credit for the
closer knowledge hundreds Of thou
sands of people in the United States
have of work done by hospitals.
Again wish to thank you for your
lSird assistance in the way of publicity
and Endorsement.
BIRDIE GOLIGHTLY,
State Chairman. National Hospital Day
Birmingham. May 10. 1921.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1921-05-21

If former Governor Cats is an in
nccent man. he can hasten his vindica-
ton by telling the authorities where
he is.
If BRAND and Lloyd George are
merely playing politics they ought to
show some consideration for the pal
pitating heart of the world
= + =
Having crossed the Atlantic 81 times,
Colonel Harvey ought to know a card
sharp when he sees him.
The average "moonshiner" merely
asks to be let alone for 10 months.
After that time his heirs will have
something to look forward to.
= y y
"Crockery breaking" in Europe
should be stopped before 1t leads to a
prcmiscuous breaking of heads.
Franklin X. Lane died poor in world
ly goods, but rich in the esteem of his
fellow man.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1921-05-21

ry. an English pronunciation.
The English pronunciation of ser
In clerk" and derby sometimes is
spoken of as having been originally
cockney form, but ''cockney" did not
mean originally an ill-educated or I'M
derbred person. 1t meant a London
err born and bred in the metropolis
ignorant of rural life. 1t was equiva .
lent in its implications to the Ameri
ca frotiersmars term 'tenderfoot," which
implied ignorance Of western life and
the effeminacy which the westerner
attributed to anyone unused to the
frontier. The pampered or ''cockered''
heir, as we'll as the city-bred man, was
termed originally cockney in Eng
land.
1t may be argued that to be strictly
consistent those who call the Kentucky
derby the darby" must speak OF
clerk as a Clark" but Emerson said
a long time ago that a foolish fear Of
Inconsistency is the hob goblin Of small
minds. and the aphorism is applicable
to the use Of the English languaxe.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1921-05-21
HONOR AMONG THIEVES

From the Philadelphia Public Ledger.
Here's novel complaint. 1t is al
legged to come from the "Tramways
Plckpockets' Association of Genoa and
it is directed to the chief of police
The thieves feel outraged because their
victims have the dishonest habit" OF
reporting their losses as greater than
they really are When the loot is d.
vided. those who share 1T accuse the
man who brought 1t in of holding
OUT on the others. See they cry,
"the police reports say you got 2,5OC
lire You've only turned In so lire
Where's the rest?" And that makes
trouble in the ancient and honorable
fraternity. The moral. as the oecula-
tors remind the public, is that alleged
horest people should be more delicate,
The attitude of the Pickpockets' as
ISOLATION is that of a sidewalk mer-
chant who sold what were called ca
naries. He was indignant one day at
a dishonest patron. said he Il spent
half an hour painting an English spar
row to, look like canary, and that
man had the nerve to give mo coun-
terfeit half dollar for it,"
Evidently the public Of Genoa has no
heart for poor men who have under
taken to equalize the distribution OF
property, raising the INDECENT and
reducing the affluent to. democratic
fiscal level. OF what use is 1t to be-
come an expert in thievery If ones
sleight-of-h and science are to be
set at naught by those who bear false
witness as to the proceeds OF the pill
fering? 1t will be OF little avail to
build up a great reputation as a pick
pocket. il your victim tells the author
tiles that some new-fledgcd upstart
stole ten times as much MS you did. No
wonder the light-fingered gentry Of
Genoa are irate at this want OF per-
ception on the part Of their constitu-
ency.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1921-05-21


BY DR.. Edward S. Holder.
Here where resistlessly the rivar runs
Between majestic mountains TO the
The patriots watch-fires burned: their
consistency
Won freedom as heritage for their
sons.
To keep that freedom pure. inviolaAe,
Here are the nations children
schooled in arts
or peace in discipline of war; their
hearts
Made resolute, their wills subordinate
N To do their utmost duty at the call
OF this. their country. whatso Or be-
fall
Broadcast upon our history'' anhfs
The record of their valiant desds are
strowTi.
Proudly their alma mater claims her
own.
May she have sons like these from age
to age!
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1921-05-21

Suspension of Trade
Cause of the Trouble

! ~ UR foreign trade was stopped
w That is all that has happened
The rest is detail.
The cotton financing schemes, the
emergency tariff bill, the cry for i'm
port duties on graphite and peanuts
the necessity for wage reductions and
freight rate reductions, the wailing
of this and that man waiting for
prices to come down before resuming
what he was wont to do, the decline
in steel and iron, trade depression
and general stagnation date back to
that one thing.
James A. Farrell, president of the
Steel Corporation, compressed it in
three sentences, saying:
The original cause of the depres-
sion and stagnation was the COM
plete stoppage of foreign trade.
Nothing else has happened to u.s.
Our overseas commerce was
suspended by the war and our
whole machinery of industry and
trade slackened accordingly.
Did we delay association with the
allies for fear that the world might
realize what was meant by the thirC
of the IA points of Woodrow Viii.
son? Here it is:
The removal so far as possible
of all economic barriers and the
establishment of an equality of
trade conditions among all of the
nations consenting to the peace
and associating themselves for its
maintenance.
Did pure love of gain mask under
the plea Of isolation?
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1921-05-21
LLOYD GEORGE POORLY PAID

From the Detroit News.
There has been good deal of talk in
London, some of 1t at an official inves-
tigation, about the salary of the prime
minister of England. AS a matter of
fact that salary seems a little absurd
when one considers the Importance to
the world of the office, as indicated by
the events of the World war The
prime minister gets a salary. which,
translated tnto dollars (normal ex-
change rates) would amount to about
$25. 900
The President of the United States
used to draw just twice as much till
the salary was Increased to $4,000.
There cannot be the slightest COM
parison between the quarters of the
prime minister of England (the official
residence) and the White House. The
former is on Downing street. narrow,
dingy thoroughfare, which turns off
Whitehall at the foreign office dingy
The official residence is as dingy as the
street,
Downing street, since the Irish trou-
bles became acute, has been barricaded
with plain. painted board fence. 1t
was not shut off from the balance OF
London during the World war
The living quarters of Lloyd Geors e
occupy the upper stories of the dingy
old house and are inconvenient, old
fashioned and would make an American
congressman's wife grasp with horror.
not to speak of an American First
Lady of the Land" They are furnished
principally by the crown and the fur
nishings are rather awful, too.
At the investigation of ministers pay
by the select committee of the House OF
Commons. Mr. Asquith, for SO many
years the privileged tenant of mo. TO-
spoke of the old building with scant
respect, saying that it certainly does
not add to what one may call the
sweets of the spells of office.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1921-05-21
ADRIFT WITH THE TIMES
T IT RACK

HE'D NEVER GET 1T BACK
The magician will now extract a
pint Of Scotch whisky from the gentle
mans hat"
do you suppose he win pass it
around for inspection, as he did the
magic rings. the Hindoo blocks and
other apparatus2'
Hardly. He may want to use that
pint again"
DOMESTIC AMENITIES
"1'll have you to understand that 1
viii play second fiddle to no woman"
said Mr.. Gadspgr. at the height Of the
quarrel.
Who's trying to set up family or
chestra?" asked Mrs. Gadspur. sarcas-
tically. "You couldn't play any instru-
ment but a bass drum. and you
couldn't even hit that after one of your
home brew parties"
HELP WANTED
Doctor, Mrs. Torfel will be around
to see you in day or two
"well. sir?"
81 want you to prescribe rest in the
country"
you want to get rid of her. chr"
mot particularly. but she has her
heart set on jazz Beach,
PosTERITY's MISSING SOMETHING
There's no demand for great dra-
matte works.
You must be mistaken about that"
mo, I got my Information from
budding author, who has been trying
to sell play" PAUL COOK.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1921-05-21
Buy a Tag for
the Community Sing

0T1HIS is tag day for the commu-
u nifty sing.
No one should hesitate to give. 1t
is for every man, woman and child
in Birmingham. 1t is for all, free of
scharge to all.
The community sing has more than
indicated itself. Last winter the au-
diences were overlooking ones. The
sing has become a fixed feature of
community life.
We will need it still more during
the summer months when it will be
held in the open air and many thou
sands will enjoy it each Sunday aft
ernoon.
The man who doesn't know where
to the cheering words of our multi
millionaires who say hard times won't
last long.
4 patient in an Illinois hospital acct
dentally swallowed $4,000 worth of ra-
dunn. The doctors lost no time in
opening him UP. and for once the oper-
alton was justified.
= = q
Friction between France and Eng
land dates back to the time when an
English yeoman boosted that he could
whip three Frenchmen any day in the
week.
While several eminent Americans
have an eye on the chief justicesnip Of
the United States supreme court the
honor will probably go to corpulent
gentleman from Ohio.
y 4 y
The Illness Of Trotzky is said to
have been confirmed. We insist on
triple confirmation Of all news" from
Russia.
xE y
The balloonsts who will hop off"
from Birmingham this afternoon run
some risk of getting q ducking in the
great lakes.
So
Laying off large number of prohi-
bit.on agents just at this time may
tempt some Of them to go into business
for themselves.
= 4 =
NJ Carpenter says 1t won't cost
newspaper men franc to see him
train. Though foreigner, M. Carpen-
tier knows the value Of publicity.
= = =
A magazine was sold in Greenwich
Village for 81, which was probably 70
cents more than it is worth.
The anti prohibition sentiment in
Milw aukee may be due to realization
that beer made Milwaukee famous.
y =
Have we sense enough to disarm?'
asks contemporary. That's what
Brother Borah is trying to find out.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1921-05-21
IN HOTEL LOBBIES
AND ELSEWHERE
Getting Better

''The business outlook is growing
better already and there are indica-
tions of a good time coming in the
near future" said H. F. Cooper, presi-
dent of the Peoples Bank & Trust Co.
of Selma, who is attending the Ala
bama Bankers association conyen-
ton.
we are seeing signs of the better
ment now, although the money has MOI
as yet started to flow freely.
The farmers in our section of the
state will be able to pull through this
crisis all right. Those that are tenn
porarily financially embarrassed are
being helped by their neighbors and
In time will weather the storm and
will be able to gradually get on their
feet with the aid of the new crops
they expect to plant,
The lumber business in our section
has already started to boom and i
doing very nicely
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1921-05-21
AMONG THOSE PRESENT

From the New York Herald.
According to the very latest figures.
The population of the continental
united States is o5,71o.6ao--and G.
Carpentier.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1921-05-21
SHE'S ToDDLING NOW

From the Admission Star.
What has become Of the old FASH
Toned mother who. about this time Of
year, used to feed the children sassa-
fras tea and sulphur and molasses?
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1921-05-21
Another Ruth

1T is quite interesting to have a
famous newspaper woman as a name
sake" said Miss Ruth Nicely of Ashe-
Vile. N. c. There is Cincinnati news
paper woman who bears my name and
I am frequently mistaken for her. Only
recently l received a marked copy of
a magazine containing an article by
Ruth Nicely" but it was not me, it
was my double.
Il have frequently gotten mail re-
garding journalistic matters and |
know they are intended for the other
Miss Nicely. I certainly would like to
meet my double and tell her how much
I enjoy being mistaken for her.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1921-05-21

From the Cleveland Plain Dealer.
Michigan father is puzzled to find
name for his eighteenth child. Has
anyone suggested to him that "Finis"
might be the auspicious monikArf