Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1921-09-14
Womdn,s Life and Loue
Is MatrimonY Doomed2
BY yINIFRED HARPER COOLEY

even several babies. while he still is ir
| college and getting his first start-bu
in the nature of things this Is unusual
Among poorer folk marriages are
contracted without waiting for adc-
! quate earnings. or else Tin factory
! towns. especially, il is said) thousands
! Of temporary illegal unions are openly
/ INDUCED in. the girl working, as wet
as the man, but neither daring to take
I up the expense Of home. Such ir-
regularity is more prevalent through =
cut even puritnnical America than
most Of us average comfortable, well
! educated people realize.
/ Take it all In all therefore. Is monog- :
amy so widespread as the narrow
religlonist proclaims2
1t has much In its favor, If people
would just enter into il with rational
Ideas Of Giving and let live" of '' bear =
ing and forbearing," and with a decent
regard for the partners independence,
freedom and privacy.
But no irrational in the first throei
of passion and jealousy. irrational they
remain, even when the heat of first
love has cooled. The civilized world
has proclaimed for many centuries
that woman is owned by man, whether
father or husband. and until recently
she has been regarded as legally ir-
responsible. a ward of the state. To-
day most of the archaic laws have been
expunged from the books, but the basic
belief that man is the superior an
''thc boss" has sunk deep. Instead
of honestly seeing marriage as a freely
entered into partnership, the archaic
theory Is held that it is n miniature
empire with each man czar. No mat
ter what the relative intelligence or
ability or moral worth, always it is
the man who Is the head of the
house. in the general public mind.
Democracy has had long pull to es.
tablish itself in the body polite. and
kaiserism in the family also dies hard.
Even under the old system there were
many happy unions. Oontented slaves
are not an unknown phenomenon.
Gfldsd cages are attractive to those
who never lcng to use their wings.
Because Of physical comfort, harsms
even today often are extolled.
On the other hand, too. many free
marriages do come a cropper, and fail.
Given a wide latitude OF action, and
a many sided temperament mated with
another many sided temperament, and
there are infinite varieties Of friction.
But this does not prove that the an
cient immutable slavery was desir-
able and moral state of being
Monogamy certainly has not sue
ceeded. in any sense. but 1t is not
proved that it has failed. Grcnter free
dom of choice and a new moral plane,
on which woman can choose from de-
sire instead of from necessity of sup
port. will elevate marriage and i'm
prove the stock. If it seems that in
America a wide range of choice already
is permittcd--that no parents work Il
dover system. but that young folks do
exactly as they please-this is not cor
rect. \ man has considerable latitude
of choice. but a girl can select only
from n few samples presented her. Lack
cf opportunity. u narrow environment.
and the tradition OF modesty hamper
her, until she can but pick but one of
three, perhaps. from all the men in
the world Think of it: in choosing
a dress (Which Is trivial and tempo.
rary) we have the range of hundreds
of stores; but in selecting a husband
twho is important and permanently we
can pick but one out of two or three
from Life's Shop Window, or must be |
content with poor remnant on the |
Bargain Counter Is 1t strange that so
few marriages are ideal?