The Washington times., 1921-04-24
w IG w AG S
Sigrlaled BY Tiller
(CepyrieAt. ls2l.)

strike. durn ye. strike; you'll
never ind me better prepared
Senator Helm thinks the story oi
the farmer and his SNAKE me-"
cine" is fairly apropos as TO ="
preparedness of nations
Many Jokes have been told about
the colored soldier from the sou.n
who was drafted for service In the
world war. 1t was an entirely new
experience and adventure Tor thou
sands of these negro boys who haa
seldom been on their own neisn-
borhood soil. !.
Congressman Tom Connaily. OF
Texas, says he knows an ofncer
who one day met fleeing coioren
doughboy behind the battle lines
in France. He was a typical south-
ern darky and as he ran MS iace
and the whites of his eyes and dry
tongue depicted the initial rear OF
battle.
where are you going7" sterniy
demanded the white officer. ~ ne
halted the doughboy who was con-
Quoted q one-man retreat.
Boss. cap'n." painted the negro.
Use runnin'. jes CANT stahd al
dat fuss; dey's too much shoot'h
and bullets and noise for dis pore
sojer Who Is your"
Il am Colonel Blank" severely
replied the officer
"A colouel--a colonel" CALCULATED
the surprised negro. Lawdy,
colonel, is 1 dat far back towards
de rear?"
Congressman Connaiiy thinks
this is illustrative of how some OF
the doughboys at the front magni-
fed the distance back to reei-
mental headquarters. or course.
there were numerous colcnels ana
general in engagements. ana 1ew
soldiers, white or colored, ran
away from noise and bullets" but
II Is a good story just the same
ana II might have happened and 1t
might not. But IT is bringing a
laugh around where members OF
Congress swap yarns and expert
ences.
Outside of his ability and genial
ity, congressman Samuel y. Wins
low, of Massachusetts. has two dis
tinctions-he 10 the fattest man in
Congress and the only manufac-
turer of skates represented in the
national legislature. Congress has
claimed as members everybody
from undertakers and dairymen to
lawyers, 'dirt farmers" but Wins
low, so far as hasty examination
Of the record reveals Is the only
manufacturer of ice and roller
skates to glide into The biz Capitol
building.
CONGRESSMAN winslow weighs
more than 800 pounds and the cir
cumference Of his bodily equator
is such that an ordinary tape line
will not measure him. Not long
ago Mr.. Winslow sprained his
ankle and joking colleagues per-
sisted in spreading the report that
he had taken a tumble while on q
'winslow 'skate'-which may be
interpreted in one or more ways.
Congressman James r. Mann. Of
Illinois. one-time Republican leader
of the House and extraordinary ex-
pert on parliamentary law and
late cake. II Mr.. Mann were a
youngster he might be called In
these modern days Of soda foun-
tain lunches a ''cake-eater." How
ever, Mr.. Mann eats chocolate on
the floor of the House and not at
fountains. When there is nli-
buster in progress. or legislation
Is to be closely watched. Congress
man Mann foregoes lunch or din
ner and sends for a piece of choco-
late. This he nibbles while work.
ing away in his seat.
The late Speaker Champ Clark
several times referred TO Mr.. Mann
as the most useful man in the
House. This tribute from one of the
opposite party came because Mr..
Mann is almost a flend for studying
bills introduced. No bill. minor or
great, escapes his watchful eye and
no bill is called up on the floor
without Mann knowing from the
start that II contains q "joker," or
is loosely drawn. or against preced-
ent. or all Highland so on.
Congressman Mann seldom
leaves the floor and in the past en-
gagged in some notable fllibustcrs.
1t was then he learned to utilize
chocolate as a substitute for regular
food and he appears to get thrill
and sustenance from eating such