davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Birmingham age-herald., 1921-09-07
ONE LITTLE FLEMISH
Will Mar Your Beauty

No matter how perfect the features or how prettily gowned. if your com plexion is marred by pimple or ugly blemish, you cannot possess complete beauty.
 Little facial blemishes can be cas- iiy removed by the use of Black and White Beauty Bleach.
 This delightful flesh-tinted cream forms an invisible coating which will clear the skin of tan. freckles, pirn- pies, unsightly blotches, livei spots and similar blemishes.
 Black and White Soap should be used in connection with Beauty Bleach. It is a pure soap and a de- lightful aid in keeping the skin clear, soft and youthful.
 Black and White Beauty Bleach can be found at your drug or depart nlent store; Bleach 50c the package, Soap 25c. the cake. Free literature and samples of Black and White Face Powder and Talcum sent upon re- quest to Rita Murray. Plough Chemi- gal Co.,. Memphis. Tenn.
The Crittenden press. [volume] (Marion, Ky.) 1919-current, 1921-03-11
not

N o. D. UH..r VA m ioH
.. u tt.
........ 49,.
..,..
49,, s.,.,l., ~
it. Q.auuN ,anls,ne h'.i hrI'
$500. L.. t..r IA.
nuI.i a...hHf pastor ei ihs t'm
N,it.li.i .hunh
a Iet Hus vss r''rn ai i'
..l t aH tIaht u.hI liH
aa. atI aIif.i'i a.i l.
The Crittenden press. [volume] (Marion, Ky.) 1919-current, 1921-03-11
ATWOOD

Do lu IaHb .u u W
u. usUs iamt ani Nu tHa
H.mHr uu, n .W ns.tH.Ib...
'Udat snvmm
NI anI tI D.uIt laHh bel.
.I N.e use lamh afWia,
Aara tuiis, - Dol .u. mul..
auulai
Nn Nrnl M.p.u,U sni .'n. an'
Ussrisf sui uis Stella tUbuir Dol
an U.usl D. Wu.dsii, Friday
&c., Belle lamb Me- ,ma li'm
Does ani Me- Nsn uuual osr
sae.u q Au lanr lamb Friday
The Crittenden press. [volume] (Marion, Ky.) 1919-current, 1921-03-11
DYCUSBURG

Rev Geo Gass filled bi appoint
ment here last Sunday
Mu " g. Charlie. is visiting in
Roiiclare W where her husband b.
engaged in revival
Liela Ferguson b. spending The
week end with bee Grandmother
near koou
Ma ) O. Hayes and laIeen FER
guson retained home Friday from
lula whsr, ihey hay, been visiting
Freeman Hn,ion of Providence b.
visiting here
u u rcuyman Ua. called %
Henderson Wednesday fur .broal
examination
G L. Lott and family have moved
here
Mr j D. Mckinney pu' lu
night with Misse. ola and lyIme
I Charlie
A Graves spent DAG assl boo
lopknsviIle
Euy buchanan ii piiu.ah a.lt
.iur relative. here
Ton Mitchell n paia.ah h4 pu
chased Rice GmseD
I MlH Dave Krone reformed a boz
homs u. Gi.b,ri.t..r SATURDAY
So and Mu ,ha He,Ur after
spending o. manIh hsr have t.uu
io their hUmr hear h,.h,m
Leonard Ritter and hnIE mu
moved % Livingstone county
BE- and Mr Iom Hart u.lIs.
their .sn 30 ilLa lar ursk
Mrs Wood Hanrts. of logan Co.,
spsnt rhuriai alih Mn tam
Howard
Mr Orlsan Campbell ~ near e
ven spring. sas boo toau Saturday
lsaIan Mckinney and famll o
near Lula be- visiting Boz and Mr
Mhlu0n isuutuu
The Crittenden press. [volume] (Marion, Ky.) 1919-current, 1921-03-11

N Ir ua uIlali I,fHuni
ms f Nu colo N.t.mss
.'aI
800 HuI Mcconnell .sn iH
I.a..IHf -aiuIaat
Nn U.u. t.I.st visited boo .H
Dol. Nr un W,.i.ts .ar dai
h. artt
N 1ua N.uaasI and .t.iirsH
Iamr aH. la't ani boo sister MIt
A.. N I.is visited Nr core
u.ur. sn hmb Saturday
N Belle lamb aai Nir At'
N.Ia aft Boz ruharr ono iai
a.f at.E
M .su M.us n reported d
If I.II
800 ant ur AUis M.Nsrl ,.s
isI boo moits Mr ro.t thau
tl
The Crittenden press. [volume] (Marion, Ky.) 1919-current, 1921-03-11

sat,u,s, fsr the Press IL
Spirit of Jefferson. [volume] (Charles Town, Va. [W. Va.]) 1844-1948, 1921-10-04
A PROCLAMATION.
By The Governor.

approximately n e 1,5oo, y 100000 Of f' the
resources of our country were
destroyed by fire. The year 1920
witnessed the greatest fire loss we
have ever suffered, with the
exception of the year of the San
Francisco catastrophe. During the
past year our fire losses totaled the
gigantic sum of one half billion
dollars, due to frs that were largely
dollars, due to fires that were largely
been taken, fire hazards removed and
fitting degree of watchfulness
exercised. In the State of West
Virginia, during the present year,
several lives have been sacrificed,
numerous injuries have been
sustained and huge fire losses have
been incurred, due in large
measure to ignorance, negligence and
carelessness.
Therefore, I, Ephriam F. Morgan,
Governor of West Virginia, by
authority vested in me by law, do
designate and proclaim Monday,
October 10, 1921, as Fire Prevention
Day and / urge all the citizens of
West Virginia to take an active part
in making it day of practical value
to the State. Our fire waste in
recent years has been so appalling
that our future prosperity is
endangered. request that
appropriate exercises be held in the
public schools and earnestly
recommend that the day be generally
observed by public officials, church
organizations and all civic
organizations. Public officials in
city, district, county and state should
use every endeavor to interest and
arouse our citizens to the peril to the
state that has resulted from this
enormous waste of our resources and
the toll it has taken in human lives.
IN WITNESS WHEREOF, I have
hereunto set my hand and caused
the Great Seal of the State to be
affixed.
DONE AT THE CAPITOL, in the
City of Charleston, this twenty
sixth day of September, in the
year of our Lord one thousand
nine hundred and twenty one, and
in the fifty ninth year of the
State.
EPHRIAM F. MORGAN.
BY the Governor, HOUSTON G.
YOUNG, Secretary of State
Spirit of Jefferson. [volume] (Charles Town, Va. [W. Va.]) 1844-1948, 1921-10-04
w. C. BROWN NAMED
PROHIBITION COMMISSIONERS.

w. G. Brown, lawyer of
Summersville, Nicholas county, was
appointed last Saturday by Governor
E. F. Morgan to direct the activities
of the prohibition department in West
Virginia. He succeeds Walter s.
Hallanan, present state tax
commissioner who has heretofore
been ex officio prohibition
commissioner.
In announcing the appointment
Governor Morgan said Mr.
Brown is expected early in the week
to assume active direction of the
department.
The new prohibition commissioner
has been prominent as church and
school worker in Nicholas county, OF
which he is native, and in recent
years has been engaged in the
practice of law at Summersville with
John Wolverton and Thomas Ayers
under the firm name of Brown
Wolverton and Ayers. The governor
said, "He is a Republican and has
served as chairman of the Republican
county committee. He is widely
known as a layman in the Methodist
Episcopal church, and this
appointment is said to have beer
strongly urged by the temperance
forces in the state"
At the recent session of the
Legislature the Office of prohibition
commissioner was separated from the
tax commissioners Office. Such 6
division was recommended BY
Governor Morgan and Ta1
Commissioner Hallanan. The term
of prohibition commissioner is -four
years and his salary is fixed al
$4,000 year.
Spirit of Jefferson. [volume] (Charles Town, Va. [W. Va.]) 1844-1948, 1921-10-04
ACCIDENTALLY SHOT BY HIS
MOTHER.

The careless handling of revolver
at their home on the farm of Capt
Milton Rouss, four and half miles
south of Charles Town, resulted in
the death of Charles Hubbard, at the
hands of his mother, Mrs. Beverly T
Hubbard, Thursday mornings Mrs.
Hubbard and her son were packing
some small articles of household
utility, preparatory to moving. The
mother had picked up a revolver
from a drawer, and was about to
place it in a box along with other
articles, remarking at the time ~
have always been afraid of this
pistol" That instant there was q
flash and discharge from the
weapon, and the son dropped to the
floor with a bullet wound through his
right arm and chest. He died before
the arrival of his physician, DIR. Alex
Rouss, who was sent for as soon as
the accident occurred.
Charlie Hubbard was "a years old
and was one of four boys in the
family who moved to the vicinity of
Kabletown from Clarke county, Va,
two years ago. One of his brothers
and a sister live now in Clarke. The
other two brothers, and his parents
reside on the Rouss farm.
DR.. Rouss after making a careful
investigation of the tragedy reported
to the county authorities tina the
shooting wa undoubtedly an
accident, thereupon it was decided
that an inquest would not be
necessary. 7
Spirit of Jefferson. [volume] (Charles Town, Va. [W. Va.]) 1844-1948, 1921-10-04
THAT HAT.

Some beauties this year
Are handsomely shown
Of dropping brim and sailor
And Chin Chin Hats
Both large and small
And matron styles are clever.
But if you want hat
To suit your face
That's up to date and charming
AT Mrs. hollands place you'll find
And the price is not alarming.
But you may find
You're hard to please
And this would be surprising
Just go then to. Miss Griffith's store
Some beauties therefor buying.
The Autumn styles
This year are fine
In old Charles Town you see
The brightest, gayest styles yol
So becoming and will please.
But before you decide
To buy Fall Hat
Look we'll of course
Before buying
You'll find That Hat
At Miss Eddie's store
The one for which
You've been pining.
But before you know it
They all line up
Before Riddleberger's Show
Window
And there is the Hat
Sublimely made
The chickest of all
In color and shade
For Belinda. L. W. d
Spirit of Jefferson. [volume] (Charles Town, Va. [W. Va.]) 1844-1948, 1921-10-04

the case two hours after going to
their room. The first ballot showed
seven for acquittal and five for con-
v;cti :. Later balloting resulted in
an a. reement on verdict of mot
Guilty." According to instructions
from Judge Woods, the jury was not
allowed to find the defendant guilty
of murder in the first or second de-
gree, or of voluntary manslaughter.
The charge of carrying concealed
weapon is still pending against young
Stephens, and this charge will re-
ceive the attention of the court be-
fore inal adjournment. Court adj
jour I'd Wednesday evening to Tues
day, October d.
Divorce DEGREES were entered in
three cases. Florence j. Irving was
the complainant in the first against
James Irving, defendant. Thornton
T. Perry, VS.. Lucille Perry, are the
parties to second. Divorce was
granted on the ground of wilful de-
sertion for a period of three years on
the part of the defendant. Viola B.
Overstreet won the third case, OBJ
tanning a divorce fom Lewis w.
Ovelstreet, and was given the right
to resume her maiden name, Viola
Smallwood.
The case of Edgar Davis VS.. Nan
ME Davis, was referred to H. V.
Sheetz, Commissioner, with instruc-
tions to take testimony and report at
the next term.
Reports of Geo. M. Beltzhoover,
Jr., Special Commissioner, were con-
frmed in two cases, one of Louis c.
McAnly and others VS.. Mary McAnly
and others; and of Robert E. Fox,
Admir-, and Chas. w. Fox VS.. Dewey
Fox. His report as trustee in the
second case above was also confirm
ed.
Kearneysville Creamery Co. vs..
Joseph Wise and others; defendants
given leave to file their joint and
separate answer.
Berkeley Taylor VS.. the Fidelity B.
and L. Association; cousel for de-
PENDANT. was given leave to file a
written argument. Ten days were
allowed him for the preparation of
his brief.
James M. Mason, Jr., VS.. c. F.
Wall; leave given defendant to file
an amended answer in ten days.
The case of Southland VS.. the
Baltimore & Ohio Railroad is being
tried before a jury today, Attorneys
James M. Mason, Jr., and John T.
Porterfeld representing the plaintiff,
and Col. Forrest w. Brown
representing the Defendant. The
case arose from the accidental killing
of Mrs. Southland by a train at
Duffields several months ago.
Spirit of Jefferson. [volume] (Charles Town, Va. [W. Va.]) 1844-1948, 1921-10-04
BLoODHOUNDS TRAIL FIREBUC
IN BERKELEY COUNTY.

A pair of bloodhounds from
Fairmont, in charge of Sheriff
Glover, were put on the trail of a
suspected inceniary last Sunday
night in the Gleugary section Of
Berkeley County, and the dogs led
the accompanying posse, including
Sheriff Glover, and Deputies Lord
and Jack, from Sheriff Deans corps,
to the home of William Miller where
the suspected man, Garden Kettering
boards. The dogs followed the
scent of the foot tracks and stopped
with the usual signs Of nervousness
and excitement at pair of boots
which were found at the Miller home
and which belonged to Kettering,
The hunted man, however, had gone,
and the hounds were put on the trail
again after a shirt which Kettering
had worn while in the local Jail some
days ago. and which was recognized
by Jailer Jack and Turnkey Lord
had been passed in front of the dogs
to keep them a fresh scent. The dogs
then led the men to anothr place
some distance off where, it was
learned, Kettering had been at some
time Sunday. The trail was lost
there and the dogs brought back; but
Monday morning Sheriff Dean sent
the officers, without the dogs, out
again. The dogs were taken back to
Fairmont.
The barn that was burned
belonged to Alex Mason, of the
Glengary section, and was burned to
the ground about / o'clock Sunday
morning, with total loss estimated
at $1,000, and not covered by
insurance. Incendiary work Was
suspected from the start because OF
remarks alleged to have been made
by Kettering in speaking of Mason
and after some little examination OF
the fire and the surrounding ground
Mr.. Mason came to Martinsburg and
asked Prosecuting Attorney Hannis
and Sheriff Dean to get the dogs and
trail the suspect. The dogs arrived
Sunday night and were sent out
Immediately, working most of the
night.
Kettering was arrested Monday
morning by Deputies Jack, Lord and
Harper and brought to Jail to await
a hearing. The warrant for the
arrest was sworn out by the state.
Spirit of Jefferson. [volume] (Charles Town, Va. [W. Va.]) 1844-1948, 1921-10-04
BUSINESS LOCALS.

Highest cash prices paid for beef
hides. Hyman Wiener.
Bonnie B hair nets and good form
hair nets made from human hair and
sterilized. Brown & Hooff.
A new stock of perfumes, talcum
powders and toilet waters just re-
ceived at the lowest prices.
Brown & Hooff.
Pyrox and Dry Lime and Sulphur
spray material, For sale by Burns
& Marshall.
We have in stock a very desirable
quality of note paper which we are
offering at very low price with en-
velopes to match Brown & Hooff.
Hyman wiener pays good prices for
all kinds of junk. Let him know if
you have any.
We pay highest prices for horse
hides. Lyman Wiener.
A long experience enables me to
furnish you meat of the best quality.
Living up to this l can not always
furnish at the cheapest price
c. F. WALL.
Spirit of Jefferson. [volume] (Charles Town, Va. [W. Va.]) 1844-1948, 1921-10-04
FUTURE OF WORLD RESTS
WITH AMERICA.

Maj. Darwin, son of the author OF
Origin of the Species" has written
for The Washington Star, Sunday
October 9, his view of a great
opportunity now before America
New plans for the formation of an
ideal nation, the value of eugenics
Startling new theories by famous
English scientist. Order your copy
of next Sundays Washington Star
today!
Spirit of Jefferson. [volume] (Charles Town, Va. [W. Va.]) 1844-1948, 1921-10-04
LOOK HERE FOR 1T.
Many a Charles Town Reader Will
be Interested.

When people read about the cures
made by medicine endorsed from
far away, is it surprising that they
wonder if the statements are true?
But when they read of cases right
here at home, positive proof is
within their reach, for investigation
IS an easy matter. Read Charles
Town endorsement of Doan's Kidney
Pills.
W. H. Weakley, N. George St.,
Charles Town says: "Doan's Kidney
Pills are an old remedy with me.
have used them off and on for years
and have always found them
satisfactory. My back ached and
distressed me so at times / could
scarcely straighten up. There was
no let up to the pains day or night.
Inc action of my kidneys became
dlsordered and l was completely run
esown. Doan's Kidney Pills soon
nked me up and put my kidneys in
1000 e shape. l depend on Doan's
whenever whenever have an attack of kidney
Arnee 60c, at all dealers. Don't
Spirit of Jefferson. [volume] (Charles Town, Va. [W. Va.]) 1844-1948, 1921-10-04
APPoRTIoN ROAD BONDS.

After the fashion of distributing
the war loans of the government, the
state road bonds to the amount OF
seven millions or more are to be
apportioned among the counties
They are apportioned on basis OF
20 per cent Of the capital and
surplus of each bank.
The figures for the apportionment
in this senatorial district are:-
1929, 500. Berkeley county
$149,000; Hampshire county
$4,000; Jefferson county, 100000
Morgan county, $4,000.
Spirit of Jefferson. [volume] (Charles Town, Va. [W. Va.]) 1844-1948, 1921-10-04

The next invention is an automatic
telephone, which the Chesapeake and
Potomac Telephone Co., is preparing
to install throughout several
exchanges in Baltimore. The buttons
n the Dial are pressed when a
number is wanted, instead of calling
the operator.
Spirit of Jefferson. [volume] (Charles Town, Va. [W. Va.]) 1844-1948, 1921-10-04
CITY COUNCIL NET LAST NIGHT

At the regular semi monthly
meeting of the city coucil last night
there were present Mayor A. M. s
Morgan, and Councilmen A. D
Mahoney, w. H. Baldwin, FRANK
Cockrell, Vim. H. Anderson, G. F
,-onklyn and j. w. Carney.
Property owners on East Liberty
and East Washington streets were
ordered to lay pavements.
1t was ordered that a concrete
cover be put on the drain at the
corner of Mildred and Washington
streets.
A proposed ordinance prohibiting
the driving of cattle through the
streets was referred to the Ordinance
Committee.
Spirit of Jefferson. [volume] (Charles Town, Va. [W. Va.]) 1844-1948, 1921-10-04
Wooden Boxes For Sale

| have purchased from the u. s.
Harness Co. all of their empty Boxes
and will sell them cheap to quick buy
ers. Also have for sale large quaint
ity of iron snaps with small chain at
tached- Every farmer should have
some of these chains and snaps. Will
sell them cheap. Can be had at nv
place of business or any hardware stor {
IN town. LYMAN WIENER,
Spirit of Jefferson. [volume] (Charles Town, Va. [W. Va.]) 1844-1948, 1921-10-04
Catarrh

Catarrh is a local disease, greatly
influenced by constitutional con-
dltions. HALLS CATARRH
MEDICINE is a Tonic and Blood
Purifier. By cleansing the blood and
building up the System, HALLS
CATARRH MEDICINE restores
normal conditions and allows Ma
ture to do its work.
Spirit of Jefferson. [volume] (Charles Town, Va. [W. Va.]) 1844-1948, 1921-10-04

At large protracted meeting in a
small town one night, the Preacher
called upon Mr.. Van Zant to lead in
prayer. AS no response came, the
Preacher repeated the above request,
to which an old lady in the back of
the Church arose and said-Mr. Van
Zant has just stepped out.
Spirit of Jefferson. [volume] (Charles Town, Va. [W. Va.]) 1844-1948, 1921-10-04

Special services will be held in the
Charles Town Baptist Church every
evening at 7:45 beginning October
23rd, 1921. Mr.. R. A. Mcfarland,
pastor of the Rivermont Avenue
Baptist Church, of Lynchburg, Va,
will assist the pastor. We extend to
you a cordial invitation to attend
these services and bring your
friends.
Spirit of Jefferson. [volume] (Charles Town, Va. [W. Va.]) 1844-1948, 1921-10-04
FOR SALE.

Good Brick Dwelling in Ransom
on N. Mildred street, also brick
dwelling on N. George St., in Ran
son, near the Harness Factory
Large frame dwelling near the N. &
w. station.
The Moore Ins. & Realty Co. 2
Spirit of Jefferson. [volume] (Charles Town, Va. [W. Va.]) 1844-1948, 1921-10-04

Elk President Woodrow Wilson
lives a routine life and in better
health since leaving the White
House. Mr.. Wilson is now IS wears
old and has always kept up with the
established custom of Grace before
meals and the reading of the word of
God before retireing. Mr.. Wilson's
weight is $50 pounds, his hair white
as snow, his eye sight unimpaired.
de is looking well and has robust
appetite.
Spirit of Jefferson. [volume] (Charles Town, Va. [W. Va.]) 1844-1948, 1921-10-04

A household remedy in America
for 25 years-Dr. Thomas Eclectic
Oil. For cuts, sprains, burns, scalds,
bruises. soc and Coo. At all drug
stores.
Spirit of Jefferson. [volume] (Charles Town, Va. [W. Va.]) 1844-1948, 1921-10-04
FOR SALE.

Chevrolet light delivery truck,
express body and canopy top. Price
for quick sale.
j. Jas. Skinner.
Spirit of Jefferson. [volume] (Charles Town, Va. [W. Va.]) 1844-1948, 1921-10-04

Pleased to have you see the Beeves
We are killing. If you want roast
you can pick a steer and we will
drive him up and butcher him for
you. CT. Wall.
Spirit of Jefferson. [volume] (Charles Town, Va. [W. Va.]) 1844-1948, 1921-10-04

Mr.. Norval w. Gallaher, of
Washington, D. c., spent Sunday
with his sister, Miss Louisa n.
Gallaher.
Spirit of Jefferson. [volume] (Charles Town, Va. [W. Va.]) 1844-1948, 1921-10-04

Doan's Regulets are recommended
by many who say they operate
easily, without gripping and without
bad effects. soc at all drug stores.
Spirit of Jefferson. [volume] (Charles Town, Va. [W. Va.]) 1844-1948, 1921-10-04

You have missed treat if you do
not get roast from Wallis out of
his show cattle.
Spirit of Jefferson. [volume] (Charles Town, Va. [W. Va.]) 1844-1948, 1921-10-04

Blue Ridge Lodge, Knight of
Pythias will here after meet at 7:3O
p. m, instead of 8 o'clock.
Spirit of Jefferson. [volume] (Charles Town, Va. [W. Va.]) 1844-1948, 1921-10-04

l wish to return many thanks to
the ones who patronized me so nicely
at the curb market on last Saturday.
! will continue my same work at
home and deliver at the same price.
You can send your order by mail or
call. Lizzie Jobnson
4l0 s.. Lawrence St., Charles Town,
Spirit of Jefferson. [volume] (Charles Town, Va. [W. Va.]) 1844-1948, 1921-10-04
EXECUTORS SALE
OF VALUABLE TOWN AND
COUNTRY PROPERTY.

4 COUNTRY PROPERTY.
In pursuance of the provisions of
the will of the late Mrs. Susan r.
Carroll, the undersigned executors
will offer the following property for
sale at public auction on
TUESDAY, OCTOBER IS, 1921,
beginning at 10 a. M, in front Of the
Court House in Charles Town, w.
Va, to-wit:
pIIcINEcc ppnpEpTv IN
Spirit of Jefferson. [volume] (Charles Town, Va. [W. Va.]) 1844-1948, 1921-10-04

Any skin itching is a temper
foster The more you scratch the
Albuquerque morning journal. [volume] (Albuquerque, N.M.) 1903-1926, 1921-05-11

fetal to another. This circumocuton took time
and prevented the prompt action that one gets
in a private business where mans success de-
ponds on his ability to study out short cuts and
get quick action.
1t has been great reproach to the recent ad-
ministration, that it tolerated these antiquated
methods. Government business should have been
reorgani2ed years ago the model of private
corporation President Taft made earnest effort
to bring this about, but his work interrupted
by democratic victory. President Harding's cab
met has taken up the problem where he left it,
and will no doubt accomplish great improvement
of method.
Albuquerque morning journal. [volume] (Albuquerque, N.M.) 1903-1926, 1921-05-11

Wolf. But before | nibble your
ears I'll take a swing"
Z Down he sat himself in the
swing, but you know what hap
pened.
The vine broke, and down
came the old Wolf ker-bunko!
"oh, wow" howled the Wolf.
What has happened? ! guess
The sky has fallen! I'd better go
home" And away he ran, not
hurting Uncle Wiggily at all.
1.-THE Wolf was too heavy for
the swing and he broke it," said
the bunny, who didn't know that
the squirrel boys had gnawed the
vine almost in half. II must make
the duck girls another. I'm glad
the swing broke with the Wolf"
And Johnnie and Billie were
glad, too, and they didn't gnaw
the new swing which the bunny
gentleman made for the duck
girls. SO everybody was happy
except the Wolf, and he didn't
deserve to be.
But if the bread knife doesn't
cut the grass so short that it
looks like a bald-headed man
playing tag with a grasshopper,
I'll tell you next about Uncle
Wiggily and the hammock.