davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Coconino sun., 1921-08-12

J. H. Seay, the obliging slim guy in the Breen-Lewis drug store, asked an old colored man down in Mississippi who had been convicted of stealing chickens how he managed to lift them right under the window of the owners house when there was dog in the yard.
 "Hit wouldn't be no use, Boss," said the darkey, "to try to 'splane dis ting to you all. Elf you was to try it you like as not would git yo' hide full O shot and git no chickens, nuther. Eff you want to gage in any rascality, Boss, yo' better stick to yo' drugs, whah yo' am familiar"
 We heard good definition of one of our local citizens the other day who was described by another man who knows him well as the only man in Flagstaff who can strut sitting down.
 "No," said Davy Joy, speaking of stolen yearling, "the only earmarks the critter had was that his tail was cut off,"
 Dr. L. B. McMullen says one of his teachers told him about pupil that spelled marriage mirage. Did you mark it as correct?" Dr. Me Mullen asked the teacher. "I sure did" she replied.
 "A patriot" declares Ben Doney, in philosophical mood, "is man who refuses to button his wife's waist. A martyr is one who attempts to, but fails. A hero is one who tries, and succeeds. A coward is man who re- mains single so that he won't have to try"
 Judge J. E. Jones tells this of an old justice of the peace in Arkansas. He had just been elected to office. His first case was that of a man arrested for stealing horse.
 Guilty or not guilty?" asked the justice.
 Mot guilty" answered the prisoner.
 "Then what the deuce are you doing here?" demanded the justice. Get out"
 Davy Joy was telling someone about [. the recent duel, described in last weeks Sun, between Santiago Cutter ez and Jesus Vasquez, in which the latter slashed the former with a pocket knife. "He had four scalp wounds" Davy explained, 1.-two of them on his chest and two of them on his right arm"
The Coconino sun., 1921-08-12

the first paragraph of his address, and admitted that when he came to south ern Arizona he was a preacher. But when I saw that glorius winter wealth CT the territory had, warm sunshine, flowers blooming, birds singing, l un- derstood why the people were indiff- erent about going to heaven. And in summer I realized that hell had no terrors for them"
The Coconino sun., 1921-08-12

A folding gang plank for steam ships, quickly placed in position for use and taking up little room when idle, is the idea of New York in ventor.
The Coconino sun., 1921-08-12

arrested last week out near Moqul Tanks for bootlegging, were brought to the county jail, where the names of each were entered on the blotter, Gal lagher threw out his chest and an- nounced that his full name was James Hardboiled Gallagher.
 Our idea of a useless thing is the fire extinguisher that hangs on the wall at our lovely depot.
 A tourist lady told Sid Gassman last week that she knew he must be English, don'tcherno, because the front door of his store swings that way.
 Little Edwin, son of Mir. and Mrs. John Pollard, was sent to Keller's af- ter some sweet stuff. When he got home he said: q didn't go to Kel- ler's; l went to the other feller's." When asked if he knew where he did go, he said he didn't, except that he knew that Fatty Arbuckle waited on him.
 William Walker, who spent several months recently in Mexico on one of his jaunts into that country, says he saw whole regiments of Mexican SOL diers wearing American uniforms. A dealer near the border had picked up a lot of them and they had sold easily south of the border. Walker tells about seeing private stIuting around in an American officers uniform, com plete even to wound stripes, except that he had no shoes, and the same day seeing Mexican captain proudly wearing another kind of uniform. The latter asked Walker what branch of the American service the uniform he wore represented, at the same time pushing out one of the buttons for in spection. The uniform" was the elephant" brand overall.
 Walter Durham says that he and George Campbell had big argument once over whether a tramp that had been hanging around for day or two or goat that lived near the depot south of the tracks smelled the worse. They finally agreed to leave it to Sandy Donahue. They went out and caught the goat and brought it into Sandy's place, or the place he then owned, the Commercial, on railroad avenue. Sandy got one whiff of the goat and tainted. Then they brought in the tramp and the goat tainted.
 An eastern paper tells of a certain Judge Fisher, of Arizona, who was at a dinner and was introduced by the toastmaster in a long speech dealing humorously with the change in voca-
The Coconino sun., 1921-08-12

An eastern paper tells of a certain Judge Fisher, of Arizona, who was at a dinner and was introduced by the toastmaster in long speech dealing humorously with the change in voca- tion made by the judge after arriving in the territory,( soon to become a state. The judge noted this effort in
The Coconino sun., 1921-08-12
CHEERFUL CHIRPS
(By "DEL~

tly nonsense except in thos intervals when re
 comes along and is grabbed of
The Coconino sun., 1921-08-12

A tourist lady told Sid Gassman last week that she knew he must be English, don'tcherno, because the front door of his store swings that way.
The Coconino sun., 1921-08-12

"No," said Davy Joy, speaking of stolen yearling, ''the only earmarks the critter had was that his tail was cut off,"
The Coconino sun., 1921-08-12

We heard good definition of one of our local citizens the other day who was described by another man who knows him well as the only man in Flagstaff who can strut sitting down.
The Coconino sun., 1921-08-12

When Jimmie Gallagher, T. J. May CTS and Frank (Silent Kid) Kuhen,
The Coconino sun., 1921-08-12

Our idea of useless thing is the fire extinguisher that hangs on the wall at our lovely depot.
The Coconino sun., 1921-08-12

Dr. L. B. McMullen says one of his teachers told him about a pupil that spelled marriage mirage. Did you mark it as correct?" Dr. Me Mullen asked the teacher. q sure didw she replied.
The Morning Tulsa daily world. [volume] (Tulsa, Okla.) 1919-1927, 1921-01-24
STATE WAREHOUSE SYSTEM.

The world cannot refrain from advising the
members of the STATE legislature TO 80 exceed
ingly slow and careful in appropriating state
moneys for the construction of state warehouses.
There is not even a respectable minority sonti-
ment for this legislation, and even II there was II
would not affect the fact that such legislation
Is highly improper and in no sense contemplated
by the scheme OF government under which we
live.
Mr.. Townley OF the non partisan league
might be expected to ask such legislation II he
were In control OF Oklahoma affairs. for II /,
highly soclalistic lie has established Just such
institutions in Dakota where he has been in
control and It Is due to such legislation hy the
non partisan advocates that Dakota Is now
financially and economically, in tottering con-
dition.
There IL precisely no moro justification for
the state to erect these warehouses than there
is for the state TO erect tank farms for the
storage of oil at the taxpayers expense To say
that any considerable number OF farmers will
he benefited is to say what is palnabIy not 80
Because the scheme does not make IL possible
for any considerable number Of farmers 10 avail
themselves of the facilities created even did they
so desire to do so, which they viii NOT,
The explanation that the appropriation is
lin the nature OF a loan" that will be returned
TO the state is In line with several kindred moves
in Oklahoma recently The state hospital mai
ter is fresh In mind, likewise the $50. 600 900
road bond issue that wasn't to increase taxation
at all
II is one thing to sympathizc deeply with the
farmers OF the state and diligently seek to aid
them in every proper way, but it is distinctly
another matter to hypocritcally seek to gain
their favor through a legislative enactment that
is indefensibie from every standpoint
Gentlemen of the legislature you should &c
slow.
The Morning Tulsa daily world. [volume] (Tulsa, Okla.) 1919-1927, 1921-01-24
UONORING MOTHERHOOD.

A friend sends in the following editorial, taken
from an unidentified newspaper. with the sug-
gestion that it ls worth rcpublshng. lie is right
Here II is.
\ woman passed. She was soon to be
mother. Tho doctor had said she should take
wnlks IN the braclng air. She was obeying in
the interest Of her unborn child.
AS she passed, some women looked at her
pityingly and somc smilcd-a smile Of disdain.
II was an ordeal for her just to be seen.
only her duty to the child nervcd her.
Two men went by. when they had passed,
one smirked and winkcd, as IL the sight were
in some way humorous,
Nobody paid defcrence to approaching
motherhood. And yet the task for which she
was preparing is the greatest, the most important.
the most hazardous task that ono can perform,
No man hero ON IA battlefield ever did anything
half as heroic
Yet had famous soldier passed how folks
would have cheered!
The woman. however. did not want cheers
She did not want anything but Just to be allowed
to go her way IL not unnoticed, then at least
noticed not unkindly.
There are cuntrles whore, as an expoctant
mother passes. all men give right Of way and in
courteous tribute lift their hats
Is there any reason why we should make the
ordeal OF motherhood harder than nature her
self makes It?
The Morning Tulsa daily world. [volume] (Tulsa, Okla.) 1919-1927, 1921-01-24
THE QUESTION or DISARM AMENT.

Mr.. White member OF the Versailles
ference. says that the time is ripe for dIsarma-
ment and insists that the United States should
lead in the movement.
We turn to the advice OF Colonel Roosevelt,
given In private correspondence during the time
OF uneXampled peace. In meaning but not in
precise words, Colonel Roosevelt wrote What
folly II would be for any OF the free, self govern
ing peoples like the United states, to dsarm
first and thus expose themselves to the hos
tility OF old world governments that will ever
exist towards them SO. long as there is throne
to defend"
There ia nothing In the history OF the United
states to cause tho sliEhtcst uneasincss in IN"
minds Of other governments, no matter how
large an army It may maintain or how many
hattloships It may construct while such activ-
tiles on the part OF older governments, IN the
light OF history can mean but one thing.
The United States should and will follow any
legitimate and honest movement towards dis
armament. II would be the height OF altruistic
folly for tt to lead such movement and OK
pose its people TO the pcrs likely 10 follow.
The Morning Tulsa daily world. [volume] (Tulsa, Okla.) 1919-1927, 1921-01-24
Taking Ii Seriously.
JONES"

Editor World: OF course, the writer does
not expect everyone to agree with his ideas, but
he does want TO read the truth in his daily
paper.
The cartoon In this mornings paper lat
tached) is nothing more than a lie, No one can
truthtuly say that the present crime wave IL
result Of prohibition, II Is, however scientific
fact that liquor breeds crime. All employers
including yourself prefer to employ men who
10 not drink intoxicating liquors Most OF them
now insist total abstinence.
why this propaganda? why do YOU and
some other editors permit cartoons and articles
to appear in Your papers which lay false
charges against prohibition and other worthy
mOvomCntS2
with the wrong, get the facts, come clean and
words pictures IL yellow method,
been falsely pictured your editorial sheet
but the blue laws have been greatly exaggerated
and many misleading statements made regard
ing same.
have been a reader Of your paper for eight
aud oue-half years and have sent YOU some COM
plimcnts, Sp don't think I'm regular kicker
JUS play square; look around, you'll find lot
of Tulsans strong for prohibition and most Of
them have good reasons for being strong for II.
/ for ono know the brewer and saloon keeper
very well; | come from ST. Louis and have them
,he family among my friends; even some
4 thcm are glad prohibition came--thcy and
their families are better for II,
Sincerely,
Tulsa, Jan 20. ii, W. MEYER.
The Morning Tulsa daily world. [volume] (Tulsa, Okla.) 1919-1927, 1921-01-24
The Promoters Wife
BY JANE PHELPS

know what she had been told that
] hid the resentment from her.
"IIe said that the man / asked
about was on the verge OF some
trouble in his affairs. That his
health was giving way under the
strain; and that unless he changed
his tactics he would regret it al.
ways
II shivered with dread and appre-
hension. | had no way of knowing
that aunt, as had /, had given the
information in her question. That
almost anyone with keen brain
would have made the same deduc-
tioD as had the man to whom We
had paid ten dollars for a few min
utes of his time.
ut is ridiculous for him to have
talked that way. ] know Neil Is
worried and anxious, what man as
young as he who made so much
money wouldn't be? But the very
idea OF his daring to say that Neil
must change his tactics 1t is al
most insulting" Then after n mo-
ments silence ! added: II hope you
won't repeat that to Neil. | would
not let him know you have question
ed the man about him or his affairs
IL ! were you. He doesn't like any
thing that looks Ike interference,
you know" | said, thinking OF his
wish that his aunt would go home.
Il guess | have the right to ask
anything ] want to. And as for in
terfering, 1t would have been better
II | had done that when | first
come. am not blind, Bah. | know
there is something queer about Neirs
business affairs. | also know you
are aware of 1t, and that IL worries
you, causes you great anxiety"
II do worry" / admitted. Then
anxious to disabuse her mind of any
suspicion of NeIl | added, "But only
because OF his health. why Mr.,
Frederick told me only the other
day that Neil was perfectly wonder
ful in business" | did not add: "If
he used his keenness in the right
direction" which had been the way
Mr.. Frederick had finished.
Well, Frederick Is all right him
self, but | am convinced Neil isn't
aunt said decidedly, just as we
reached home.
(Tomorrow-Neirs aunt Is anx-
ious because or his constant over
workingD
The Morning Tulsa daily world. [volume] (Tulsa, Okla.) 1919-1927, 1921-01-24
Told at Oklahoma City
An Inside Glimpse.


An interesting senate episode can
come from the inside. When the
governors long list of appOintees
Jailed to be confirmed at the execu-
tive session Of the senate, 1t was
known there was trouble over con-
firming Highway Commissioner
Henry Wood and George Clark,
chairman of the state board of af-
fairs. There was also a battle
staged against state Health Com
missioner A. Il. Lewis. but not so
intensive as surrounded Wood and
Clark.
1, was arranged that Rutherford
was TO introduce motion to sus-
pend the board OF affairs operations
at Talihina for the tubercular hos
pital until an investigation should
he made and Floor Leader r.. T..
Hin also had a motion to hold back
and ask for further particulars from
the board
This was all regular and looked
good on the surface, and 1t was to
have proven cause for surmise that
the senate majority was just digging
down for actual facts.
Insurgent Bob Wallace broke up
the playhouse by scconding both
suggestions and making a speech in
each case. Wallace speaks well, al
though not long at time. He said
enough. however, to convince those
listening that Investigations ought to
happen, II for no other reason than
to set forth that the board Of affairs
is the correct business wagon Of this
state and has not warranted some
OF the rather violent attacks made
on its work in the past several
months,
The Morning Tulsa daily world. [volume] (Tulsa, Okla.) 1919-1927, 1921-01-24
About Torcn and
in Hotel Lobbies

Better lighting OF street, s ,r,
OF the paramount needs or r.. ....
now. This is admitted by do
"ciner, commissioner of ,,-.,..
and public property, and ls l,.,.l.,
by citizens who live ln r,ir,...'
n"ous Whcrc there are 300 stree,
lights. They believe adIrI.,.l
lights will help substanfisf.' d., '
ducing the number of ht'dup. r.,..
or which occur at on near d4rs
corners. There are apuiirIt..,,. ..a
file now for perhaps 200 u.t. ....,.
lights steiner said. We ara, .,
ing the Public Service comp,,.. .,
install them as rapidly as pus..t.,
and we have received 3-sYr4r,,
from tho company that uu. r.l.as,
will be fulfilled as soon as mlt....ls
can be obtained. We are mruIrI.1
that Il large quantity of tnis n,.
tcrial Is now ON the road. bu. Do ID.
doubtful If there Will bc enough FL,
this shipment to supply hl.f tho
lights chat are needed
Much OF the trouble that has
existed between Mexico and lie
United states has been moro .nla-
nary than real" declares H. q.
Knapp, connected with the local uf-
flee of the Mackcy Telegraph com.
pany. who spent number OF Year..
i'm Mexico and who speak, Spanish
flucntly. He acted az WtuprOt,.
part Of the time for GuNcru.. aa
Lara party hero last week. 'MIm
Of the stuff written about NuNyu
for consumption In the United
States. and much OF the sjuN Ngt-
ten about the United states for cuu-
sumption in Mexico has hooH the
product OF some shurt-ighted
writer who, perhaps, went mio
or two across the border and from
his experiences there wrote long.
winded stories Of the. entire country
10 the north or to the south ut tu,
Rio Graudo." Knapp asserts OF
have spent much time bon Mexico
during the past 81 years and hay,
vet to be insutcd by a Mexican Dee
cause OF my nationality"
The Morning Tulsa daily world. [volume] (Tulsa, Okla.) 1919-1927, 1921-01-24
Bennie's Notebook

Pop was smoaking and thinking
and | was looking at the diffrent
names OF the diffrent books in the
bookcase, and | sed, Wat does auto
boggriffy meen, Pop?
Wen people are hard up for some
thing to do they rite the story of
their life and everything that ever
happened TO them since they were
born, and that's their autobiography,
sed pop,
@ pop, I'm going to rite mine, /
sed.
Go to it. you mite as we'll get 1t
out OF your s'stem vile you're young,
sed pop.
Yes sir. sed. Wich | started to
do. and after vile | sed. It's done,
pop, do you wunt to heer IT,
I'm neutral, sed pop. Meenlns he
would lssen IL red II. Wich | did,
being the following as follows:
Wen | was baby was born In
the same house | kepp on living in.
Wen I was a week old | Couldcnt
wawk or tawk. Wen | was munth
old couldont either and wen | was
3 munths old | couldent and wen I
was munths old | couldent, and
this kepp un til, I was a yeer old.
and even wen ! was "A Ncer old |
couldent. After | was a ycor old |
started to go on yeers and this
kopp up for hole yeer until had
another berthday and then | started
TO go on 3 yeers and this kepp up
another hole yeer and then | had
another berthday and then | was
going on yeers still In tho same
house. and this kepp up for another
yecr---
Hay, hay. aid, sucker, assistance,
sod pop, how long is this berthday
stuff going to keep on
Ony iii I'm jest like In reel life,
I sed, and pop sed. Well then ! don't
need to heer cny more tn know
you're natural born autobiography
ritter. your autobiography is jest
about as intr!sting as most peoples
atohoggriffies,
Proberly being why ks dident
wunt to hesE AbQA
The Morning Tulsa daily world. [volume] (Tulsa, Okla.) 1919-1927, 1921-01-24

Another master mind has hit Tulsa. His
name is Adrian and he wants. at - much per
want we presume, our public schools to teach
birth control and the grading up Of the human
race.
How long, o Lord, how long!
The gentlemen had read. or been told, that
Japan, the rcactionary progressive of the Far
East, Is going to ass a similar law and straight
away he wants America to adopt the ism
the fad or whatever name best suits II.
II We get" the gentleman correctly, II ls
his idea that two-leggcd stock show be held
every year where the young men and young
women OF possible marrying age shan be OK
hibtcd and graded only those who manage TO
high enough to get the blue ribbon Will
be permitted to go 10 the breeding pen. Tho
othcrs-weli, we cannot even imagine what is TO
be done to or with the others
Frankly. We don't know how they get that
way. and what IL much more to the point,
don't know how It Is that an who do get that
way manage to find their way to Tulsa. Is
there cult here that secretly In seeking 10 make
Tulsa and It's schools the cat on which Is to be
tried all OF the utterly silly and indefenslble
theories of hair drained scholastics7
Sometime we fear that IL true,
Az unaiterabiy opposed are to al OF
the little ncar-g gods who arrogate to themselves
the right to dictate to the great human race how
II shall develop and expand; who are constantly
seeking TO contract the tremendous evolutionary
forces within narrow grove of their own
delineation. there are times when we can almost
some visture In their presentments
For instance. concerning the birth control
business. Had It been started soon enough
assuming that there is in fact some efficacy In
It's belief. we might have been saved the afflic-
ton Of just such individuals az Brother Adrian.
For II the censors judges whoever II is
that 1t Is proposed should fix the breeding
standards, had been vlgilcntly on the job. surely
they would never have let him happened.
In the mantme, however. we prefer TO nd
here to the old standards and the old methodS>
II we are any Judge OF prcssnt-dny conditions
too much already is already known concerning
birth control, and the grading is down rather
than up. At any rate, we prefer to let "A physi-
cal weakling Ike Roosevelt, develop himself
through sheer mental ability, which no uplirter
is capable of detecting into physical and in
tellectual giant that sways the world.
The Morning Tulsa daily world. [volume] (Tulsa, Okla.) 1919-1927, 1921-01-24
WANT SIBERIA EVACUATED
Opposition Party of Japan Ndopts.
Resolution Demanding Change =

TOXIC, Jan. 23, = ImW0UIlIV
evacuation of Siberia, universal n
frage and iusistcnce upon Jap1ns
rights in the California question
were demanded in resolutions passed
today at a general meeting of th.
Kenseikai, the opposition party o'
Japan.
The party in addition 20 tho fore
going demands, urged that 'he
maintenance OF friendship with me
United States be made basic p'icy
OF this nation.
Niscount Kato, leader OF the party
regretted tho fact that America Was
not a member of the league or ma
uons. lie approved the plan Tor zee
strlcting armaments, he said,
The Morning Tulsa daily world. [volume] (Tulsa, Okla.) 1919-1927, 1921-01-24
II Feel sorry For Him.

II feel sorry for him" said
woman attache of the state house
when Lieutenant -Governor Ed Trapp
appeared wearied OF chair duties.
Under the present arrangement
the presiding officer does not dare
to leave his position. lie would have
TO call President Pro Tcmpore Tom
Simpson to the chair. who is really
very splendid fellow, but whose
knowledge of parliamentary law
and senatorial precedent has been
very sadly neglected.
The lieutenant governor under
stands that simpsons taking the
chair means a grilling gun fire from
lnsurgent Bob Wallace. Even Trapp
has to work hard to keep Wallace
from rolling too many stones ahead
Of the dministration machine.
II Is an armed neutrality be-
tween Trapp and Wallace. The
former stands up TO preside, never
using the splendid big chair placed
at his disposal. Wallace resolutes
and motions and calls for points of
order with an astonishing regularity,
calculated to irritate The presiding
officer.
The warfare is OF much interest
and attracts visitors TO the senate
chamber usually about the drollest
and most uninteresting spot when
the legislature is in session. II Is a
real war-between two men who can