Evening star., 1921-04-10
|TORCHY PLOTS A SMEAR
demands Old Hick-
ory here the other mornin'
as he pads into the gen.

you. sir" says I. following him
into the inner sanctum with the
morning mail.
.''Ha" he snorts. chuckin' the last
three inches of a Cassadora into the
waste basket and selectin' fresh one
from his desk humidor And who
might some of 'em be-"
Well" says I, there's Mr.. Blivens.
from the Broadway National. to ask
about some securities of ours that's
been offered them; and the bulldin
agent with the renewed lease; and a
clerk from your personal attorneys
Bah" says Old Hickory. why
don't they see Robert?"
Because he went to Chicago last
night. sir" says 1.
Well. 1 can't spend the forenoon go
ing over trivial details. Can't do it.
Important matters. Send 'em all of,
and when you've done that. go to Mr.,
Piddie and bring me those Mesaba
contracts. Understand?'
Right" says 1.
But as hrrries toward the waitin'
room l almost runs down this poddy
old party with the pop eyes and the
Cordovan tan complexion.
"Ellins in YETI" says he.
Ye-e-es. sir" says 1: Just ar.
rived. But I'm afraid he's rather tied
up this morning, Mr.. Dowd."
"Oh. that's all right" says the Hon
Matt. "1ll be only minute. Got
something very special to tell him."
And in he goes, without even trou-
blin' to knock.
Course. beanless private sec. who'd
just had strict orders to bar every
rash about then; grabbed the Hon.
Matthew Dowd by the coat tails. or
said a few hasty words. But I don't
figure on the pay roll so heavy simply
because I've been with the Corrugated
Trust SO long. Part Of my job is to
know when to hunch my shoulders
and let things ride. Which is what I
did then.
You see, the Hon. Matt is one Of
Old Hickory's cronies. They're mixed
from seven figure investments to the
joint ownership Of a two-acre island
| down in Barnegat Bay. where they
used to go duck huntin' before either
of 'em got the rheumatism habit.
They're co-directors on half a dozen
different boards. and lately they've
| helped organize new plute country
club with an initiation fee that makes
me gasp every time I think Of it.
X X x X
| co who am I to block the Hon. Matt.
from the private Office when may
be he's toddlin' in with a scheme that
may mean millions to both of 'em?
| Besides. it was plain the old boy was
| excited over something or other. l
could tell that by the wild glitter in
his pop eyes and the puffy way he's
| breathin'.
| Honest. 1 hardly knew whether or
| not to break in on 'em when I'd got
the contracts from Piddie, but l de-
| cides to take chance on trickHn' in
quiet And say! What do you guess
they're debatin' SO hectic? Same old
Hon Matt. with his feet planted wide
and firm on the Turkish rug and an
umbrella gripped in both hands, dem
onstratin' a swing.
Il tell you. you old FOSSIL" he's an
or ha xn dqve G1t It seo as ss
Bah" says Old Hickory. you
| never got a 200-yard drive in your
, life. Matt: and what's more. you never
| will. What gives you such crazy
| ideas?"
'Hah" says the Hon. Matt. That's
| what I've been keeping a secret all
winter. But / don't mind telling you
| now. rye been using the Jock Mac
Intosh indoor instructor apparatus"
'Humph" sneers Old Hickory. ''Yes.
That doesn't get you anywhere"
"Oh, It doesn't, eh?" says Dowd.
"A fat lot you know about Jocks
me tell you. Ellins. I've gone into it
deep. Cleaned out my billiard room
| in the top story Of my house and in
stalled the whole apparatus. And
canvas screen isn't all. No, sir. You
must have the mirrors. the flight in
dcators. the speed registers and the
book. Especially the book. illustrated
with more than 100 cuts made from
actual moving pictures of Jocks
swing. And say. how 1 have studied
| last three months. But I can do it
now. I've got the Macintosh swing"
You" snorts Old Hickory. Why.
you old duffer you couldn't swing
| the way Jock Macintosh does to save
your life. He's a long-legged Scotch
man. built like jointed fishing rod.
while you and I, Matt, are more like
human pork barrels He can spraddle
out. of course. and use that low. fiat
| swing. But you! Ha! Ha-. Say. do
| that again, Matt. It's too funny for
'Is it," says Dowd, glarin' at him.
Til show you how humorous 1t IL
when get you out on our new course.
Let's make it twenty-five. Matt"
says Old Hickory. TT you must know.
I've been brushing up little myself"
"Oh, I know all about it," says
| Dowd. you've been taking lessons
Precisely" admits Old Hickory.
Just plain. everyday sporting de-
partment golf lessons at $1.ss for
every half hour. But given by one
| Of the best instructors in this or any
other country. Yes. Sir. That's what
| I claim this little Ross is. He knows
| better than to try to make a man with
a forty-two-inch waist measure swing
like schoolboy. No jumping jack
notions No straddling. Just a plain,
easy swing. with the body behind the
stroke. That's Neils method"
.Tommyrot!' says Dowd. That's
a sns ssp sas Says '0s5 ss IN Ga' ee
book. Do it with your arms and get
the snap in with the wrists at the
moment of impact. You'll f1ub every
shot. Ellins, if you try to get your
"oh. viii r. says Old Hickory.
Say. the new course is to open next
take you on, Dowd. at $50 a hole"
"Eh?" says Dowd. blinkin'.
don't know how many millions the
Hon. Matt could cash in IL he should
| unload all his holdings, but for all that
| he's a regular hard-boiled egg. I've
their golf matches before. but l hap
pen to know that the huge stakes
they've always played for has been
limited by Dowd to dollar Nassau.
Also I've listened in when he'd been
| struck all three ways. and he sure did
| beef some about parting with those
| three bucks.
FIFTY or nothing" says Old Hick-
| ory. "And if you've got a 2Oo-yard
drive up your sleeve. why should you
| worry? Put UP or shut up. now. Is
! it go for Saturday."