davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1921-10-09

No man should marry under
thirty nor over forty, cautions an
eminent writer. Now II some one
would only raise the age limit to
sixty most men would be safe.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1921-10-09

Some men are so afraid to talk
back 10 their wives when asked to
wash the dishes that they simply
dry UP.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1921-10-09

President Harding plays the
cornet. Even the greatest Of US
have our faults.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1921-10-09

The seventy.two-year-old Mayor
near Atlantic City who welcomes
the one-piece bathing suit must
have that eye for economy bust.
nessmen are crying for.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1921-10-09

Every benedict is a hero, only
some aren't so true when they're
tried.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1921-10-09

The Allies by their victory won
the freedom of the seas. But how
about the freedom Of the husbands +?
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1921-10-09
Proof.

tSEREDDIE has a fortune in poll
tics. He knows the ropes"
declared the admiring friend.
Eyes, judged that from the
campaign cigar he gave me-"
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1921-10-09
Pretty /!

eco you're engaged. Good work.
old man! is she pretty"
Pretty! Say, If that girl ran for
the Presidency of the United
States there wouldn't be a woman
vote for her"
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1921-10-09

Science would have a cinch 4
It was as easy to make a man out
Of a monkey as It is to make q
monkey out Of a man.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1921-10-09

Ad. in theatrical paper: AT
liberty-female impersonator. Per-
feet lady on and of the stage"
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1921-10-09
Important.

SSyUHAT are the most important
islands on the >globe?" asked
the geography teacher.
And without hesitation the boy
from New York answered: Ellis,
Manhattan and Coney."
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1921-10-09

A divorce by any other name
would be just as sweet.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1921-10-09

Progress means measuring dis
lance by Babe Ruth, time by pro-
hibition and dress goods by i'm
agination.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1921-10-09

When a man says his wife can't
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1921-10-09

Ethics Of poker: A gentleman's
game is quiet game where
nothing but money talks and seldom
II ever whispers to you. In such
a game very little is said on your
part excepting What you got?"
and That's good" Some people
can't talk without exposing both
their ignorance and their. hands.
Guys play with claim stud was
named that because players hid
cards in their shirt fronts.
Young couple gazing into jewelry
store window. She Is looking at
$4,000 sunburst; he is looking at
5000 solitaire. She tries converse
tion; he tries conversation. Leads
to argument. Young Thing: Il
know what I want" Good Thing:
"Yes, but / know what you're going
to get!" No further argument-or
conversation.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1921-10-09
The Meanest Man.

tcTHAT fellow certainly is .
dub"
For why?"
II told him I bossed my wife and
he went and told her"
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1921-10-09
His Excuse.

roLLECTOR-Why haven't you
paid your gas bill?
Consumer The light was 80 poor
l could not read the bill.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1921-10-09
From Here
and There
Not in Her Line.

0NE day Mr.. Smith went to buy
~ a bushel Of buckwheat for SOW
ing. The man who sold the wheat
was away. but his wife undertook
to make the sale. She found a peck
measure and they went to the
granary.
She filed the measure twice,
poured the contents into the bag.
and began to tie it up.
But, Mrs. Lawton." said the
man, ct takes four pecks TO make
a bushel"
"Oh, does IT." replied the woman.
untying the bag. We'll, you see. l
never had any experience in meas
uring grain before l was married.
l always taught school,"
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1921-10-09

Copyright by Star Co. Great Britain Rights Reserved
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1921-10-09

7 A N eastern professor has rung
"A the bell on longevity. He
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1921-09-01

Inc large bank barn on the farm of
J. X. Hopkins. mile east of Shen.
fefdstown on the Maryland side OF the
iiver, was destroyed by fire TUESDAY
nlght between 10 and II o'cIoct
when the fire was first noticed bv Mr.
hopkins and his family the whole in.
tefior OF the building was ablaze and
nothing could be done TO save II. The
corn-house near by was also burned
Consumed with the barn were 400 or
oOO bushels Of wheat, the crop Of hav
an OF the farm harness, a corn plan,
ter and few other articles. No live
STOCK was lost. No one knows how
the fire oiginated. There was an in
surance Of $1,000 on the barn and
$3.50 on the corn house with the Wash
ineton County Mutual Fire Insurance
company, and Harrison Schley had a
poMey for $500 on the crops.
ihls was a very large and sub-
stafial barn, Sc by AZ feet in size. and
was built in 1860 by the late VIM. M
Eiaekford. The stone walls were heav,
and the timbers in it were unusuaIlv
! large AMI well framed
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1921-09-01
onepnerosown Jefferson County, West 1871

Row" on New street. Some renegade
sent word TO the Union forces that he
was there and the house was surround.
ea before he could make his escape.
some one in the home saw the soldiers
ana gave the alarm. Captain Burke
ran 10 an upper room. The only place
In which 1t seemed feasible to hide was
a little low attic under the roof.
which could be reached through small
trapdoor in the ceiling. The only way
IN which the trapdoor could be reach
ed was by standig on the shoulders
OF some one else. Virginia McGlincy,
the robust young daughter of George
McGiincy, offered herself as a support.
Stepping from chair to her shoulders.
Captain Burke steadied himself and
finally worked the trapdoor loose.
Climbed through the aperture and fas-
tened the door behind him. In the
meantime the soldiers were banging at
the door, demanding entrance. Miss
McGlincy, armed with a hickory axe
handle, undertook to hold them back
until other member Of the family could
remove all evidence of Burke's pres
ence. The soldiers broke in the front
door. only to be met by the determined
young woman welding her club. She
gave way slowly and retreated to til
stairway, where she took her stand,
like tigress at bay. After she had
whacked several of the men over the
head with her axe, inhicting painful
wounds, they grew more cautious.
lhey produced a lantern, but she
Knocked it out of their hands. They
routed out old ME- Tommy Fawcett,
who lived next door, and made him
bring lamp. She smashed the lamp.
Unwilling to hurt a woman, the SOL
diers were puzzled, though they were
determined TO search the house.
Finally they got some candles, and fix
ing their baycnets in their guns thc,'
pressed her against the wall until tho
got the axe handle from her and held
her harmless. They then made q
thorough search of the house, b.
found no trace of Captain Burke, nor
did they know that another Confed-
crate soldier was with his family in
the same row of houses. After re-
naming at the house all night the SOL
diers departed, and when the coast
was clear Captain Burke and the othe
soldier made their way back to the Con-
federate lines near Kearneysville.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1921-09-01
Real Estate Sales.

MRS. Annie V. Moler formerly OF
Uvilla, but who has been living in Ha.
gerstown for the past year or two, has
purchased VIM. B. Rutherford's resi-
dence on the corner of Washington
and Duke streets in Shepherdstown.
and will move to this place and make
her home here.
Robert G. Miller has spId to Mrs.
Bernie Billmyer, the dwelling on Rum
sey avenue, formerly known as the
Snively property, at present occupied
by Mr.: Shafer, the railroad operator.
She will move into the house as soor
as she can get possession.
Miss Helen Pendleton, who last year
fought from r. C. Miller the prop
erty on Washington street formerly
known as the Virginia House, has re-
sold the place to Mr.. Miller.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1921-09-01
Change Of Court Term.

For the first time in about forty
years, the Jefferson Circuit Court will
convene this year in September, the
date for the opening of the term be-
ing a month earlier than formerly.
The grand jury will sit on Tuesday,
September 20. The change in the
date Of the fall term of the court was
made by an act Of the late Legislature.
The change from October 10 Septem-
Der was made in Difference to the de-
mand OF the Berkeley county bar
Berkeley had been having term OF
the circuit court in September. II also
happens that the u. S. District Court
convenes in Martinsburg in that month
thereby giving the county two courts
at one time. Under the new law
Berkeley will have its circuit court in
October.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1921-09-01
Taxes Will Be Lower.

Taxes in each of the five districts of
the county will be lower this year than
last. The county court cut the road
levy in Shepherdstown, Middleway and
Charles Town districts under the pub
lished estimates when the commission
ers were in session last week to take
action on the published estimates. They
reduced the Shepherdstown district
road levy from 25 cents to 20 cents
Middleway from 25 to 20 cents, and
Charles Town from 20 to 16 2-3 cents
on the hundred dollars.
Shepherdstown district makes the
best showing in tax reduction over
the rate of last year. The rate here
this year will be S145H as against
Sl.82 last year. Harper's Ferry will
have a rate Of S171H this year
against S1.94 in 1920. A slight re-
duction has been made for Charles
Town district. where the rate this year
will be S1.40H. Last year it was
S146.
A more substantial reduction was
effected in Kabletown district, the
rate there being cut from S1.49 in 1920
to S1.31H in 1921. Middleway dis
trict's rate this year will be Si.35X.
Last year it was S1.40.
The court allowed generations to
w. L. Erwin, Harper's Ferry, on per-
sonal property to the value of $1,000;
to George Robinson, Middleway, on
500; ]. L. Currens, Charles Town,
900 on personal property; Virginia
w. Weller, real estate in Ransom, $3.50.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1921-09-01
Getting the DOrInit0ry Ready

Local painters and paper-hangers
are at work this week getting the hotel
building, recently bought by the State
as a boys dormitory for Shepherd
College, ready for occupancy by the
students. The interior is being re-
painted and most of the rooms will be
newly papered. l.. A. Ambrose is in
stalling an additional bathroom and
the heating ;'llnt Will also be over
hsuled. The .ntire building will Dc
put in good order 11d the premises i'm
proved generally. Heals will prob
ably not be served IN the dormitory at
present, the rlan being 20 serve The
ycunG men in the dining room at the
girls dornnitory.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1921-09-01
Wants Assessments Raised.

Mr.. Yost, a representative of the
State Tax Commissioners Office, ap-
peared before the commissioners at the
levy term Of the county court last week
in the interest OF movement to in
crease some Of the real estate valua-
tions OF the county. The true and
actual value, he told the court, was
what the State Tax Commits ssioner
sought, and TO this end the court was
urged 10 have the assessor and his
deputies 60 owe. the county this fall
beginning October I, and revaIue all
the real estate. The assessments made
this fall, it was proposed, should be
the basis Of tax levies OF next wear.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1921-09-01
Boy Scouts Return.

The Boy Scouts who had been in
camp at Shannondale Springs for nine
days broke camp and returned home
on Tuesday. They enjoyed their out
ing very much, but they all had enough
and were glad when they faced home
ward. There wasn't enough amuse-
ment. They killed only two snakes
saw no spooks, got licked in both
games of ball they played and couldn't
even find bumblebee's nest to fight.
The nearest city was Kabletown, and
it wasn't what you would call lively.
The boys enjoyed the sessions around
the camp fire of evenings, when they
told yarns and sang songs. Rev. John
A. Grose, the scoutmaster, and Win
tiers Folk, the assistant, were in
charge, while Mrs. Grose and Miss
Mary Grose were housekeepers. The
scouts caught one fish, which wasn't
much Of an average FOR fifteen boys
for nine days. Mr.. Crosse reports tina.
they behaved themselves very well in
deed, and complied with the regula-
tions OF the camp admirably. The
weather was a bit too cool to pet much
enjoyment from bathing in the river
The boys say that they had to eat too
many beans, and had 10 pray or be
prayed to Sc times in the nine days
The drinking water was from the sui
phur spring, and while this was good
for them physically, the scouts couIdn't
get used TO holding their noses while
they drank. There was only one de.
sertcr from camp-Ollie Hamilton got
bad case of homesiokness and took
French leave.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1921-09-01

II you want better hair and nc
dandruff, use Owens Ouinine Hair
Tonic. Keeps the hair light and fluff
fy.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1921-09-01

BoswelPs good luck pie-flling makes
delicious pies, Favored lemon, vanilla
and chocolate.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1921-09-01
Good Roads and Traction Engines


When Floyd VanMeter, a Berkeley
county thresherman, who moves his
outfit over the roads with a traction
engine, found that he would be liable
for any damages his engine might cause
to the new State road Just completed
up there, he put his thresher under
shelter, declaring at the same time he
would quit the business. A delega-
ton Of farmers appeared before the
county court to effect some kind OF ar
rangement by which they could have
their wheat threshed. The court point
ed out that there was no prohibition
against running the engine over the
road If it did not damage the road. but
that any damage done would be charg-
ed to Mr.. VanMetre under the law,
the court having no discretion in the
matter: II also indicated that any ma
chine which in its natural state would
do injury to road might be so pro-
tected as to make it possible to run il
over the road. No order was entered
by the court, which reminded the del
egation that il had no authority in
the matter, was not responsible for the
law, but was merely calling to the
attention of the operator the facts OF
the matter
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1921-09-01

Owens drug store has always sold
Mrs. Prices Canning Compound.
Book of directions for the asking.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1921-09-01

tbr.lIt;,1in Burke figured in another
He tb.,g9 episode in Shepherdstown.
se,-''.d Siipped into town on one OF his
Of r errands and was at the home
urge D. McGlincy in the "Stone
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1921-09-01

Harrisburg, Pa, are visitors at the
horne of Mr.. and Mrs ]. Harry Hill In
Shepherdstown.
Mr.. and Mrs. Frank w. Myers and
their two children, of Crawford, N. J.,
are in Shepherdstown, their former
home. to spend few weeks among
their relatives and friends.
Mrs. Anna Houser and her daugh-
ter, Miss Clara, and Miss Katherine
Jackson, of Washington, have been
visiting the family OF Mr.. Frank Allen
the past week.
Miss Beatrice Goodwin, very
talented singer Of Washington, spent
couple of days with Mr.. and Mrs.
E. l. Coldsborough at Iceland this
week.
MIR. Willoughby M. Lemen. of Eliz-
abeth, n. j., is here to spend a couple
OF weeks with his parents, Mr.. and
Mrs. ). F. lemen, and to enjoy the
fair.
Mrs. Padgett and her son and Mrs.
Gale, of Maryland, were recent Wis
itors at the home Of Mr.. Richard
Osbourn on Sandy Ridge.
Mr.. Spencer Nottingham is here
from Eastville, Va, for a visit with his
wife al her old home He drove from
Easville in his automobile.
MIS-. John w. Link and the children
are here from New Market, Va, to
spend some time with her parents, Mr.
and Mrs. Vim. c. Linz.
Mr.. and Mrs. Joseph F. Stone and
her -four children, Of Roanoke, are in
Shefherdstown visiting the family OF
MIR. @. W. Ferrell.
Mss Virginia Needy, of the Mar.
tinsturg neighbcrhood, has been ir
Shcfherdstown this wee; visiting Mis-:
frankie Needy.
Mrs. Alpharetta Swartley and her tive
little boys, of Highspire. Pa, are her:
visiting at the home of Mr. and Mrs
E. r. Hill.
Mr.. Clarence Lick, of Marysville
Pa, was visitor IT the Reformed par.
sonagc in Shepherdstown the pas
week.
Mr.. Hiram Owens, of Owens drue
SUM- mas bSSU III washington tniS
week on business and pleasure com.
bined
Miss Mary Clark, of Baltimore, spent
the past weekend in Shcpherdstowr
with her cousin, Miss Blanche Rome.
nous.
Miss Edna Sprankle, of Harrisburg
Pa.s has been in Shepherdstown the
past week visiting Mrs. ]. L. welshans
Mr.. Charles ]. Unseld, of Wilson
Pa, is in Shepherdstown for a visi
among his relatives and friends.
Rev. Edward L. Folk, OF Frederick
county, Md, spent few days in Shep-
herdstown the past week.
Miss Mary Campbell, OF Roanoke. is
visiting Miss Sidney Kearfot a,
Kearneysville.
Mr Charles B. Na1Mcire srrrt sew
era days in Luray Va, the past week.
The Cordova daily times., 1921-07-02
Remembered
 Debt to
 Lafayette
A S9 ,a1Daa
 9ed ds S %ts .G (

Whether you have been there or are planning to go, here's a story of Val ley Forge you will want to remember. l give it as IL was told by writer in Our Dumb Animals:
 The incident nm about to relate oc- cured in 1924, during Lafayette's last visit to this country. Forty years had passed since his promise to Washing ton to return as his guest. He was now nearly 70 years old. but his heart beat as warmly for his adopted coun- try as in those earlier days when he had fought for its liberties.
 A brilliant reception was under way A slowly moving line of stately guests passed by Lafayette, who greeted each with courtly grace. Presently there ap- preached an old soldier, clad in worn Continental uniform. In his hand was an ancient musket, and across his shoulder was thrown small blanket, or rather q piece of blanket
 On reaching the marquis the vet eran drew himself up in the stiff fash
  military salute As Lafayette made the return signal, tears started to his eyes. The tuttered uniform, the ancient iintlOck. the silver haired sol der, even older than himself. recalled the dear past.
 Do you know me?" asked the sol dier.
 No, cannot say that do," was the frank reply.
 Do you remember the frosts and snows of Valley ForgeT
 "I shall never forget them" an- swerd Lafayette.
 "One bitter night, general, you were going the rounds at Valley Forge. You came upon sentry in thin clothing and without stockings. He was slowly freezing to death. You took his gun. saying: Go to my hut. There you will find stockings, blanket and fire. After warming yourself bring the blanket to me. Meanwhile I will keep guard
 "The soldier obeyed. When he re- turned to his post, you, General La fayette, cut the blanket in two. One half you kept; the other you present. ed to the sentry. Here, general. is one half of that blanket. for am the ssGr try whose life you saved"
The Cordova daily times., 1921-07-02

Some l4O years ago. in what was then the nucleus Of the United States every man and boy owned musket and knew how to use 1t.
 They were skilled in woOdcraft knew their own country and could bring down any game within range with one shot.
 Yet in all the terrible years of the Revolutionary war 1t took 25O,OOO of them to defeat 150 GOO invaders.
 The British could not shoot us well and neither did they possess the spirit of the American col0nist, who was fighting for his home and his convic- lions.
 But they were organized. They were trained
 Organization and training, brought over 5000 miles of sea. kept them go- ing in strange and hostile country where they were greatly outnumhered by the inhabitants and enabled them to remain there for eight years!
 Individually, the Colonials were b'N''4 liEil'Ali- 'Ai'ii 'iltil '''' ''A'''NA'' . collectively, they were not.
 With T5,000 trained and equipped men-half the British number-Wash- incton might have vanquished the in- vaders as quickly as their regiments were landed. Given equal training and equipment with the British. and their spirit and knowledge of the coun- try and of craftsmanship would have done the rest. At the utmost, it Is unlikely that 1t would have required more than two years.
 But instead Washington had rag ged Continentals," half starved, loosely organized, and equipped with practi- cally only what they could furnish themselves.
The Cordova daily times., 1921-07-02
TELLS OF HISTORIC OCCASION
Christopher MarshaIPs Account of Reading of the Declaration of
 Independence in Philadelphia.

There are three or four COntem- porary accounts of the first public reading of the Declaration of Inde- pendence, none of them very full of particulars and all of them lacking in agreement on some points. One of the best accounts Is that of Chris tOpher Marshall who was a member of the committee on safety and who was in an official position in Phila- delphia. This brief record of that "Remembrancer" He writCs: Warm SunShiny morning At eleven went and met the committee of inspection at the Philosophical hall went there in a body to the lodge; joined the committee of safety Gas Called) went in a body to the state house yard, where in the presence of n great con course of people the Declaration of Nixon. The company declared their appreciation by three repeated huzzas. The kings arms were taken down in the courtroom, state house. at the same time. This day the eight members for this county to serve in convention were elected very quiet ly at the Ssate house. Fine. starlight, ringing bells. with other great demon- strations "f joy upon the unanimity and agreement of the Declaration"
The Cordova daily times., 1921-07-02

Workmcn employed in the different de- partmynts, in addition to complete list of all the vessels used by the army with their masters names, ton mage, and the use to which each was put.
 These shipping lists dc moi include 'h" rr-u.ar ships of the line in the navy, hu' the boats actively cuutrlh- ulug to lh" maintenance of the army include nNrr GD craft. from small horse and prpy .uu boats to several armed uu-~ and ~loops and rhr prison ship Eamnulh.
 That those iu charge of the gov "rmn,ut pUr-e>tr'uI- had manipulated the expenditures for personal gam is q matter of history, and lruttmg, to use uo har-urr term. in the quarter masters, commissDIy's and harruck masters departments. had been prcya- lent from the very day that ,he Brit iSh set foot upon Manhattan island
 Thomas Jones. who was judge of the New York Supreme court before the Revolution. and who suffered from both sides during the war, although an ardent loyuliSt, criticiz"s the tuan- cia management of the British army severely in his History oc New York During the Rcyolution.' He does not mncr matters in describing the pecu- IationS of the quartermaSter generals in New York under Howe and Clinton and the wealth they carried back to England.