The Washington herald., 1921-02-06
By o. HENRY

l get bunch of flowers from him.
and on 'em he pinned a note. Now.
Mr.. Pratt, you know lady when
you see her; and you know how
| stand in Rosa society. Do you
think for a moment that Id skip
out to the woods with a man along
with jug OF wine and a loaf Of
bread. and go singing and CavOrtinE
up and down under the trees with
him? I take a little claret with
my meals, but I'm not in the habit
OF packing a jug Of it into the brush
and raising Cain in any such style
as that. And of course he'd bring
his book of verses along, too. He
said so. Let him go on his scan
dalous picniCs alone! Or let him
take his Ruby OFT with him. I
reckon she wouldn't kick unless it
was on account of there being too
much bread along. And what do
you think of your gentleman friend
now. Mr.. Pratt"
We'll, m" says I. 1T may be
that IdahO's invitation was a kind
of poetry, and meant no harm May
be it belonged to the class of rhymes
they call flgurative. They offend
law and order. but they get sent
through the mails on the grounds
that they mean something that they
don't say. Ia be glad on Idaho's
account il you'd overlook it," says
l, "and let us eXtriCate our minds
from the low regions of poetry to
the higher planes of fact and fancy.
On a beautiful afternoon like this.
Mrs. Sampson" goes on. we
should let our thoughts dwell ac-
COrdingly. Though It is warm here.
we should remember that at the
equator the line of perpetual frost
is at an altitude Of fifteen thousand
feet. Between the latitudes of forty
degrees and forty-nine degrees it is
from four thousand to nine thou
sand feet
"Oh, Mr.. Pratt" says Mrs. Samp-
son, its such a comfort to hear you
say them beautiful facts after get
ting such jar from that mink of a
Ruby's poetry"
Let US sit on this log at the road
side says I, and forget the inhu-
manity and ribaIdry of the poets
1t is in the glorious columns of as
certained facts and legalized meas
ures that beauty is to be found. In
this very log we sit upon, Mrs.
lAAA RSOA' say l. Is SlallSLlCS
more wonderful than any poem.
The rings show it was sixty years
old. At the depth of two thousand
feet it would become coal in three
thousand years. The deepest coal
mine in the world is at killing
worth, near Newcastle A box four
feet long, three feet wide. and two
feet eight inches deep will hold one
ton OF coal. If an artery is cut,
compress it above the wound. A.
mans leg contains thirty bones.
The Tower of London was burned
in 1s41."
Go on, Mr.. Pratt" says Mrs.
Sampson. Them ideas is so orig
inal and soothing. 1 think statis-
tics are just as lovely as they can
be"
Put it wasn't till two weeks
later that l got all that was coming
to me out of Herkimer.
One night I vas walked up by
folks hollering "Firew all around.
l jumped up and dressed and went
out Of the hotel to enjoy the scene.
When I seen it was Mrs. SIMPSONS
house I gave forth a kind Of yell,
and was there in two minutes.
The whole lower story of the yell
low house was in flames, and every
masculine, feminine and canine in
Rosa was there, screeching and
barking and getting in the way of
the t1remen. l saw Idaho trying to
get away from six firemen who
were holding him. They were telling
him the whole place was on FIRE
downstairs, and no man could go in
1t and come out alive.
Where's Mrs Sampson" I asks.
She hasn't been seen" says one
of the firemen. she sleeps up
stairs. We've tried to get in, but
we can't and our company hasn't
got any LADDERS yet"
runs around to the light of the
big blaze. and pulls the handbook
out of my inside pocket. 1 kind Of
laughed when felt it in my hands
I reckon I was some daffy with the
sensation of excitement.
'Herky, old boy" 1 says to it, as 1
hipped over the pages, you amt
ever lied to me yet, and you amt
ever throwed me down at a scratch
yet. Tell me what. old boy, tell me
what" says l.
turned to What to do in Case
Of Accidents" on page III. I run
my finger down the page, and struck
t. Good old Herkimer, he never
overlooked anything! 1t said: