The Monroe journal. [volume] (Monroe, N.C.) 189?-1965, 1921-04-22
COTTON JOKES

their employer. that il he would pay
them for over-hours. they would at
tend nkew Use at the Methodist chapel
in the evening.
They seem more impressed with the
slogan "eat an onion a day" instead
of buy a dale day And as the
onion crop has increased. they are
urging eat peck OF onions day
TO get health, equal to buy ten bales
a day" and get Ilch-but it's more
lack OF wealth than lack OF health.
In any event. the cotton men are In
peck-er trouble anyway.
Hoover SAYS conditions in cotton
trade will become normal by June
lst. This IS cncoutaging. as a con
dition OF normally Is predicted IN
every branch Of the trade. II so, Wt
can thank President Harding. uo'
only for coming the word. but he
iug TO briug Il about But just nov
lis darkness before dawn 10 ta,
AVERAGE cotton man. with more q
the darkness and moi oven a eo>e
growing for dawn.
The farmer convention and cen
eress ana association are still meet
ine. talking. planning. praying. cu-s-
ing and discussing some way to eur
tail acreage OF do og'ething TO help
him along. but he is working. plant
ing and chopping out his cotton. Re
minds me. \ minister had a salary
Of $4,000 per year api received a call
with 5000 salary \ number CT
the parishioners Went around TO his
house to sgo I'll he was going TO ae-
eept the call His son. Bobby. was
in the front yard ana they asked him
the question. il his father was going
TO accept the call He said. Il don't
know. Pa is in the library prayin-
for guidance, but Ma. she is packing.
1t seems impossible to get them 70
sell cotton in any large bulk. Hold,
hold seems 10 be the order OF the
day. am rather like the engineer
in the fifties. An Indian was lassoing
a locomotive when the engineer saw
him wiring through space al the rate
of forty miles an hour. fast to his
lasso. He rested his head upon his
hand and watching from the window
said: Indian, admire your pluck
but T. your Judgment.
Is the farmer really suffering
Can't he make diversified crop and
make money? Is he bankrupt after
several years of high prices for cot
ton? Don't he like farming? Re
minds me: 4 man travelling in Maine
met middle-aged farmer, who said
his father. ninety years old, was still
on the farm where he was born.
Ninety years old. eh?" Yes, pop is
close TO ninety" rs his health
good?" Tain't much now. He's
been complaining for a few months
back. whats the matter with
him?" Il dunno; sometimes ! think
farmerin' don't agree with him.
But maybe they need little spank
ing TO teach them the way Texas,
oklahoma and the West sold cotton
all the way down. and save them
selves from heavy loss. Reminds me-:
Mary had little lamb,
She put him on the shelf,
And every time he wagged his tail.
He spanked his little self.
There are many words of comfort
we could utter jus now, but we feel
proud Of the South for not forcing
cotton on the market, just at this
time. we condemned them freely
when the eastern part of the belt ac-
cumulatod their cotton and stacked
! il up. while Texas sold herself al
most out OF cotton at one to one and
half a cent cheaper than Carolina,
1 Georgia and Alabama were Offering.
/ A little grit, patience and courage
wins the fight. Among the many
I firms we do business with, we find
some who are peculiar and who are
persistent holders the entire season.
Others have sold freely, | note that
some of our best firms names indi-
cate their chief characteristics:
"Onc of our good firms is Watch
and Waite.
And another: 'Attit Early and Late.
And stll another is Doc and Dairet.
But the best is Grin and Frank
Barrett
Exporters who have been saying
NO so much and even won't" are
now saying all sorts of things that
mean yes" II not exactly expressed
so clearly. Reminds me; He was
q sentimental youth who had been
suffering for some time from severe
love sickness. One morning he turned
up at his fathers office looking the
picture of abject misery. Whats
the natter asked his father. 81
J -. La.ll.. IN 80. =, hn fol inrnd