davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Birmingham age-herald., 1921-09-18

permits for residences of an aggre- gate value of approximately half million dollars"
 Birmingham's August record is 125 permits for residences valued at approximately quarter of million dollars. The Atlanta valuations are higher, but Birmingham has built the homes.
 Both records are fine. There is a home building spirit in both cities There seems to be more of it in the chief city of Alabama than in the chief city of Georgia.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1921-09-18
Political Prisoners
From the Kansas City Times.

rom the Kansas City Times.
 A federal prisoner in the Missouri
 penitentiary, a woman, declines with
 haughtiness to accept freedom on the
 condition that she consent to de-
 portation to Russia, where she came
 from. Her rejection of the proffer l Is made on the ground that she is !
 political" prisoner. which she just
 loves to be, and that to enter into
 any negotiation with the government
 would be to recognize its right to do
 what it has done, which her princi- | ples will by no means allow her
 to do.
 l Wartime offenders against the
 nations laws get good deal of sat 1 isfaction out of their claim that they are being punished for their political
 acts. In their own criminal circles this passes for martyrdom. Draft ob- structors, preachers of sedition, all comforters of the enemy who were caught at their work and locked up, are political prisoners. sufferers for principle, martyrs for the cause of human freedom. That Is their
 pose and they enjoy 1t immensely. 1 Probably they do not much deceive
 themselves, but if they can deceive
 their followers and acquire some re- nown in revolutionary circles abroad, where the United States government | Is regarded, of course. as one of the
 worst oppressors of free political opinion, they are satisfied and ac- count their martyrdom profitable. To
 be political prisoner Is high distinction Such a prisoner Is sup posedIy to have given the govern ment terrible fright The prisoner may be a poor, crack-brain nuisance.
 caught clumsily trying to set fire to
 warehouse, but his crime being made out as "political" by the crack brains still at large. his reputation ie made-and frequently his living when he gets out. He is represented
 as great '1iberal" leader who had
 the government on the jump. It was
 so afraid of him that 1t Suspended
 tho constitutional guarantees-
 dearly loved phrase-and locked
 him up.
 Political crimes, 1t will be seen,
 have considerable advantages over all
 others. As these become more widely
 recognized, political crimes probaoiy
 will be rapidly extended until they include all varieties of embezziement' highway robbery, train banditry, arr son and bootlegging. Tfe specialists in these latter brahches undoubtedly have overlooked their opportunities.
 They have neglected the oratorlcai' political and propagandst depart
 ments of their craft, and by reason of their deplorable lack of fmagina- tion have had to accept criminal
 status reflecting slight credit on their abilities. If they could Jus. 1et if to the public that they are
 heinz persecuted for their political
 oninions by an oppressive govern
 msnt maybe they could get a littie favorable publicity, too. But we are afraid our criminal classes lack po- litical education. They have oeVoteo s nuch time to specialization they seem to have missed the wider signih- eance of things.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1921-09-18
pIJT ONCE THAT WAY

From Wayside Tales.
 The well-dressed man who smiled l., tne doorway was plainly book salesman.
 The woman of the house senseo that such was his calling. she greeted him rather jelly.
 Madame" he said politely. T am selling a volume, single volume which I think will interest you. May I not"
 "No books" she said firmly. Posi- lively none. am not lneeres'eu ~ any books"
 "Ah. not any books possibly, but this particular book of mine IS the only one of its kind in the world It is only s4 and worth many times as much to its owner. May l not "No." snapped the woman. T wouldn't buy 1t at any price. am tired of opening my door and find ing an agent standing there waiting to sell me something" "I though as much, my deaI madam, and that is why hoped to sell you"
 T am not interested"
 q shall never come this way again I knock but once-then pass on for ever. The title of this volume Is |N.How to Get Rid of an Agent Without Buying Yes. indeed madam. $4 is correct I thank you! Good morn ing!
The Birmingham age-herald., 1921-09-18
Satisfactory Session

T think the recent session of the Birmingham Baptist association at the Ruhama church was one of the best associations l have ever attend ed" said pr. J. R. Dobbs, pastor of the First Baptist church, the moder- ator.
 Tn the first place the attendance was unusually large. I think 1t equaled during the thre days ses- sion the state convention or exceeded 1t in numbers. Another striking fact is that it held for three days. Or dinarily when three days sitting is scheduled 1t is crowded into two days, but the delegates at Ruhama never seemed hurried or worried, and each subject before the association had a good, free and full discussion. The church and the community enter tained the gathering in true southern style"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1921-09-18
ADRTFT WITH THE TIMES
lae)t37uea

the o1d-fashioned stenographer who used to keep one stuck in her hair" WHY LANDLORDS LOOK BORED
 According to the terms of this lease, I'm not permitted to have a photograph in my apartment"
 That's correct" said the landlord. with yawn. A
 "In case like this, what becomes of personal liberty?'
 'spurlos versinkt." said the land lord. "Sign here"
 AN UNFAIR ADVANTAGE
 T was grieved to read the speech you delivered yesterday. senator
 "Garbled. sir. Garbled in the press reports"
 "But the reporter claims he took 1t down in shorthand"
 'The dickens he did! Is there no protection for man in public life?" PAUL COOK.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1921-09-18
T0 1RMINGHAM occupies its new lEN postoffice building this morn ing.

YN BIRMINGHAM occupies its new lN postoffice building this morn
 ing.
 There Is nothing in the country to compare with 1t. It is simple. con venient and useful. It is artistic, yet there is nothing ornate about it. It is a real postoffice and government building with every facility for speedy distrioution or the malls.
 Birmingham has had such exten- sive growth since this building was appropriated for by Congress that 1t is not large enough for all the gov ernment offices, and, perhaps, the internal revenue department will continue permanently in the old building on Second avenue and Eighteenth street.
 With the growth of this depart ment, caused ky income and excess profits taxes, and various other methods of raising revenue for the government, It's personnel has in creased so much that 1t will almost fill the second floor of the old post office building.
 Instead of selling this building, as formerly proposed, the government will have to retain 1t and occupy 1t.
 The new government building Is a credit to Senator Underwood, who not only induced Congress to appropriate for 1t but has taken more or less personal supervision of It's planning and construction. It Is largely built of Alabama marble and other prod ucts of this state.
 # * #
 Now that we have this new gov ernment building, everyone is eager to see the construction of the pro- posed new auditorium at once. There has been unnecessary delay in start ing the construction of this build ing. probably on account of conflict in the City Commission as to what department it is directly under. But, at any rate, the building Is to be started at once and it Is to be hoped that it will be made large enough to answer Birmingham's requirements. It should have a seating capacity of not less than 5000.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1921-09-18
RAN IN THE FAMILY


 You must have kept great many people out of the penitentiary during your professional career"
 "Oh. yes. said the eminent crimi- nal lawyer.
 Did you ever regret defeating the ends of justice?" "Only once. got pickpocket ac- quilted and discovered later that he was distant relative of mine" ART IS ExACTING
 Gan you write me a bedroom farce around suit of pink silk pajamas?''
 "Of course," said the playwright Have you star who can make the weight?" What do you nean?" ITO appear successfully in pink silk pajamas no star should weigh over 40 pounds" SHOCK WAS TOO GREAT What's the excitement here?''
The Birmingham age-herald., 1921-09-18
HOW ITO QUIT

J. D. s., in the Macon Telegraph
 q am through with booze," says Fatty Arbuckle. And that. as the after dinner speakers say, reminds of an anecdote. An old befo'-the-wah darky, alarmed at the way 2 member of the white family to which he was attached was hittin' 'em up. remon- strated with him. "Yo' been goin' mighty strong here lately, Mister Jimmy" he said, "an' you oughter kind O let up on 1t. To gonna make yose'f sick eff you don. dat's all. "Oh, know that, of course" replied Mister Jimmy. but got started on this jamborse and it looks as if I can't quit" Yes you kin, too." said the old man. "Whut you oughter do now Is take de nigger keeley cure .Nigger Keeley cure?" returned Mis- ter Jimmy. How do you take it?'' Easy enuff." was the explanation All you got to do is des run out of sumpin to drink"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1921-09-18
F Hs Vr New Federal Building and The Birmingham That Was

FNHERE is an old book in The
 ll Age-Herald office containing views of what are now principal business streets when they were not much better than unpaved country roads, with here and there a build ing to foreshawod the towering sky scrapers of today.
 It is a far cry from that era of Birmingham when "Linn's Folly" was considered an imposing build ing, to the magnificent new post office which will be opened for busi- ness this morning, a majestic struc- ture and palatial in it's appoint ments. It will be an ornament to the city for many years to come.
 The old resident who recalls the Relay House and our first boxcar station must find it hard to realize sometimes that so many changes have been wrought in brief span of years. Nothing is more signifi- cant of Greater Birmingham" than the new postoffice, one of the finest to be found in the country, alike a model of convenience and a master piece of architecture. In its massive proportions it stands as a vindica- ton of the pioneers who put their faith in Birmingham.
 Fifty years ago the site of Bir- mingham was a plantation. The Woodward building was our first skyscraper. The new postoffice is another landmark on the road of progress.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1921-09-18
NO DOUBT

From the Edinburgh Scotsman.
 Simpkins was talking about mir acles.
 "Supposing." he said to his friend you saw man fall from high roof. land on his head. get up, and walk away. What would you say?'
 No answer.
 "Supposing the same thing hap pened again soon after?"
 No answer
 "SupposIng the man did 1t three times in day. what would you cali Hit?"
 "Habit." answered the friend. with la yawn
The Birmingham age-herald., 1921-09-18
Columbus, Miss, Centennial

R. E. Johnston of Columbus. Miss. spent few hours in Birmingham yesterday MT. Johnston is chairman of the executive committee of the Columbus centennial and home com ing week, October IT to 22.
 We are planning for the greatest week in our city's history" said MT. Johnston. "Distingueshed men and women who have gone out from Coz lumbus are being invited to return to their old home to greet friends, and the entertainment features are be- ing planned on an elaborate scale.
 "Furthermore, we expect thousands of visitors who we want to see our city, enjoy it's hospitality and learn at first hand what we are doing in building up thriving community and at the same time providing all the attractive features which make it a desirable place in which to live"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1921-09-18
IN HOTEL LOBBIES
 AND ELSEWHERE
AlI in ths snme bond

"Huntsville is very much interested in selecting a. queen to represent Madison county in the Birmingham semi-oentennial celebration" said N. L. Pierce, who formerly lived in that city. T am afraid they will have some difficulty in making the selec- ton, for. of course Madison has a large number of. queens.
 "In fact I think Birmingham and Huntsville are very much on par as home Tor pretty girls. and both cities lead the nation in this re- spect."
The Birmingham age-herald., 1921-09-18
Want New Library

"As there seems to be some doubt in the matter, 1t migh be well to explain that the city has signified It's willingness to purchase a site for new central library. funds for which are being sought from the Carnegie foundation" declared John R. Hornady yesterday.
 The fact Is that when a letter was read before the commission from MT. Donnelly. chairman of the library board. the board instructed the city clerk. MT. Ryall. to advise Mir. Don- nelly that this would be done. Mir. Ryall wrote that letter tho next day. l understand.
 The city commission stands ready at all times to cooperate with the library board so far as 1t may do so.''
The Birmingham age-herald., 1921-09-18
Commendable Rivalry
 In Home Building

1ffEHE Atlanta Journal states that U s6s permits for the construc- tion of residences were issued in At lanta during the eight months of the year, ''the topmost record since the 12-month preceding the World war; In that same period Birmingham is sued 075 building permits for resi- dences.
 The Journal also calls attention to the August record, which was 123
The Birmingham age-herald., 1921-09-18
NENED BRACE TALKS ABOUT THE NEW POST T OFFICE BUILDING AND PROPOSED AUDITORIUM

trouble If he had full charge of a Pullman car. It would be burden he could not bear, and it would cost the Pullman company faE more in damage suits than it would save in doing away with its conductors.
 The Pullman conductor is as neces- sary to a train. hau1ng two or more Pullman cars. as is the railroad con- ductor.
 The Louisville Courier-Journal and one or two of the most dyed-in-the- wool democratic newspapers of this country are absurdly making much ado over Senator Underwood's accep- tance of a place on the world disar- nfament commission. Had Senator Underwood declined this appointment he would have been disloyal to his people. who have honored him. and oiSioydl to the pest lhtelSSLa OL HE country. He would have been merely a petty politician playing for political position. and an obstructionist.
 The disarmament congress is in no wise political. It is called for the purpose of relieving the great gov- ernments of the world. in 8 measure. of their greatest burden of expendi- lures. It is likewise called for the purpose of preventing further wars.
 The republican party threw no ob- structions in the path of the Wilson administration to win the World war. Why should the democrats throw ob- structions in the path of President Harding to bring about that partial disarmament which slpuld eventually bring to the world everlasting peace great nations of excessive burdens of taxation?
 Ninety-nine per cent of the people of this country will indorse Senator Underwood's attitude. The per cent who would play politics in times like these are unworthy of serious consid- eration.
 That the Louisville Courier ournai Tits new management, is amazing. I,ej t1,aea
The Birmingham age-herald., 1921-09-18
OLD DOCKS

From the Argonaut.
 Perhaps the bitterest moment in the life of lover of books" says a New Yorker. lis when he finds that his treasures are valued by no one but himself once tried to weed out my collection. after had, be- come convinced that either the. sur plus volumes or their owner would have to move out of the library. This wedding was painful process. but at last the second hand book dealer. was invited to name his price for the up-rooted weeds They're no good to me.' was his disconcerting reply. What, none of them? No, not one Someone suggested that as the books had to go the dealer might better have them for nothing. Jt was a bit- ter moment. but finally assented The man then remarked: 'Thatll be half dollar Half a dollar for whatr For taking them away"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1921-09-18
Teaching History To
 For1etful Americans

fH7 EST WE FORGET" com
 ll1 piled and written by Wil- liam Hay Williamson and published by Theodore Roosevelt Post No. 627 of the American Legion, Chicago, is designed to promote patriotism in America by reminding somewhat forgetful nation of great events in American history. Proceeds from the book, which must be bought by purchasers under guarantee that it will be distributed free, will go to the memorial fund of the Theodore Roosevelt post, to help ex-service men and their dependents.
 The author has been struck by the indifference of Americans show to- ward men who have played a con spicuous part in making this nation what it is today. It is good idea to set before the man in the street, and particularly the foreign born citizen, events of great historic sig nifieance which are known to most schoolboys, but have been forgotten by their elders. For instance, on January IA, 1776, the Rev. John Peter Gabriel Muhlenberg stood in the pulpit of the Lutheran church at Woodstock, Va, and spoke these memorable words: There is time for all things; time to preach and a time to pray; and there is a time to fight and that time has now come. May God of Hosts be with us!"
 Removing his vestments, he stood
The Birmingham age-herald., 1921-09-18
THE HOUSES

Majorie Charles Driscoll. in Leslie's. Across the street the hill runs high.
 The hill runs high and very steep. And up the narrow twisty road
 The little houses lie asleep. Their roofs are drawn down just like
 brows, Their window eyes are all shut tirht They sleep so soundly all day long, And then they wake up. just at night. [ watch the liehts begin to show, And up. as far Aa I can see The houses open all their eyes
 Across the street. and look At ma
The Birmingham age-herald., 1921-09-18
Members Coming In

New members are coming into the Wholesale Merchants and Manu.ac- turers' association daily said Charles F. Yarn. secretary The re- quest of members of the chamber eli- gible for membership to join has
 been met with hearty response
 Truth is, the spirit of co-opera- tion has been advancing wonderfully during the past few months, and this has been especially the case since
 the Chamber of Commerce has been giving its weekly luncheons and the members have begun to realize just N hat the chamber is doing and trying to do
The Birmingham age-herald., 1921-09-18
Indorses the Women

T indorse the questionnaire sent out by the League of Women Voters to the candidates for public office,' said w. N. Malone. We have come to a period in our city affairs where candidates should be placed on rec ord before they go to the polls ask ing for the support of their fellow citizens. The candidates should not object to questions asking them how they stand on vital issues.
 "The questions put by the women are practical and to the point. The main thing is: Are we to have a nar- row city government, and one where pr ejudices play large part. or are we to have a broad one where men and women citizens get the same t, eatment without regard to preju- dices and narrow viewpoints?
 "The women seek to have the can didate go on record for breadth and fairness of vision with respect tc public affairs. They are right. Il should have been done long age"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1921-09-18
MAKING CHILDREN LAUGH

MAKING CHILDREN LAUGH From the Chicago News.
 Not even the gravest scientific bodies can escape the wave of Chap lin fever now sweeping Great Brit ain. Psychologists in session at Ed inburgh have made Charlie topic in connection with the sense of humor in children. What children cry for has been settled upon and widely ad- vertised, but. the psychologists are still debating what they laugh at pr. c. w. Kimmins. an educator, ad- vanced the theory. for example. that children laugh at Charlie because he breaks all social conventions by do- ing the things they are forbidden tc do.
 The Kimmins theory. like many others. is valuable for the objections 1t stimulates.
 Does Charlie teach forbidden ca pers? The first nursery commando ment is Chat children should be seen and not heard Charlie is seen and not heard. Considering his wager. ies in detail there are few Chaplin antics that nice child might not bt allowed to attempt, granted. ol course, the acrobatic gifts and dut respect for proper times and places The throwing of custard pies Is. oi course. an exception. But how few children take to throwing pies! Ina there are better uses to which thos
 delicAcies may be put they know vel
The Birmingham age-herald., 1921-09-18

1 Let pr. Barrett and the entire City Commission get busy at once and give us this auditorium building next year.
 pr. Barrett can we'll afford to give his time and attention to this work. for the politicians say that he Is sure to be reelected and it is not necessary for him to give large part of his time to the pending cans- paign.
 | And this reminds one that some of the candidates for city commission CTS are becoming boistrous and re- sorting to the old time political meth ods of denouncing their opponents and making all manner of absurd charges, which on one occasion, at least, almost led to a general riot in the meeting.
 The people of Birmingham want dignified, working City Commission and the chances are that they will elect such regardless of the boistrous- ness displayed in the present cam i paign.
 I xs | Those of us who often have to take a business trip as far as New York or Chicago, or those who take pleas ure trips to the west and northwest are exercised over the proposed plan of the Pullman company to do away with their conductors and allow the negro porters to handle the cars
 This would never do. The porters have all they can do to make up the berths and serve the passengers.
 How, for instance. could negro 1 porter straighten out difficulty when two people happened to appear in a car with tickets for the same berth. The Pullman conductor has his hands full all the time on long runs.
 The Pullman porter has been trained to take tips. It is part of his revenue. He expects it and hs would naturally hold out berths or seats on the train for the highest bid l der. The porter is looked upon as a menial, and there would be endless
The Birmingham age-herald., 1921-09-18
NOT YET

From the Boston Herald. With general housemaids asking ks1l a week without laundry work and with furnace cleaners getting s1.25 an hour and fares. traveliAk included, 1t is hard to believe the
 financial experts who say deflation Ia accomplished.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1921-09-18
Circus Day

There Is certainly one thing that Will make even the oldest of us feel young again, and that's circus said V. W. Moss. Yesterday when the parade started and the band could be heard coming down the street. ] watched the people as they walked along and the majority of them braced up and began to keep time with the music.
 Tt really does one good to go to a circus, for 1t brings back the days when we were barefoot boys and en- joyed watching the animals and clowns so much. Somehow l just can't forget those days"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1921-09-18

"A theatre patron has tainted"
 overcome by the heat?"
 No. The man in the box office greeted him pleasantly and sold him the exact seats he wanted"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1921-09-18
SPOILED THE SERMON

SPOILED THE SERMON
 Well, my dear" said MT. Gadspur, as he laid down his golf clubs. "did you enjoy the sermon this morning7'
 NO, I didn't" said Mrs. Gadspur Just when I was beginning to get some spiritual inspiration out of pr. Founders remarks, caught sight of that hateful Mrs. Calder dressed up in brand new outfit and looking as if she were smirking at the an gels"