Atlanta tri-weekly journal. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1920-19??, 1921-07-19
SUGGESTS TRAINING COURSE
FOR ARMAMENT DELEGATES
BY ROBERT C.. RENCNLEY
associate Editor of Li6e)
UeasCd Wire Service to Tie Journal.)

| Copyright 1921
NEW YORK, July 16.-Now that
| the invitations are out for President
Harding's disarmament conference
! the only question remaining is that
of the identity of the lucky boys who
are to have their expenses paid as
| delegates.
AS there seems to be some little
feeling about Lloyd Georges ap-
pointing himself as the brother rep
resenting the British chapter, and as
in every participating country there
is sure to be more or less hard feel
ing of the appointments as arbitrary
it would be only fair to hold an ex-
| animation among the candidates for
delegates, much as college glee clubs
hold trials to see which members
shall be taken on the trip to ST.
Louis.
A call for contestants might be IS
sued in London late in the summer,
let US say, setting aside the Queens
club athletic field as the foregath-
ering place. Candidates should bring
their own morning coats. silk hats
and sneakers. The government will
furnish everything else. =,
AS the chief obstacles placed In
the way of diplomats visiting IN
America are the banquet and other
forms of official entertainment, 1t
should be absolutely necessary that
delegates have great dietary endur-
ance. A statesman with dyspepsia,
no matter what his other qualifica-
tions might be, wouldn't last round
in this country. The first try-outs,
therefore, should consist of eating
fourteen special priced dinners IN
n
pureemongo1, halibut maitre d'Hotel,
homeless SQUAD chicken bonnie femme,
salade mauvaise femme, biscuit tor
toni, cigars and coffee); during each
will be required to carry on a run
ming conversation with the chairman
of the entertainment committee on
his left and the mayor on his right,
neither of whom speaks the language
of the guest of honor.
Following this heat, time trials
will be held to test the wind. of
those who aspire to be shown points
event contestants will be hauled
about, in and out Of autos, from
place to place, and will be made to
lay corner stones, make three minute
speeches. plant trees and kiss little
school girls.
AS it is quite probable that most
of the colleges will put on special
matinees for the awarding o. hon
orary degrees to our d1Stlngulshe
guests, they might we'll be Versed
in walking across a campus in doc
tors robes, chatting with the dean;
without tripping up. They should
also learn a simple courtesy to make
Immediately after the award or the
where Sneakers" Come In
Those candidates who are left in
the field at the conclusion of these
time-trials, will then proceed to the
examination Of their fitness TO at
tend a diplomatic conference on the
question of limiting ornaments. Here
is where they will need the sneakers
that they have brought.
The first event will be IN long
distance hedging. The cand. cate
will be seated at a table and required
to agree to ten different PROPOSE
lions in such a manner that he can
not really be held to any agreement
at all. If, on any one of the propo-
sitions he is actually found commit
ing himself, he will be tnroWn cut
Immediately. .,,
come next. The contestant will be
surrounded by 25 or 80 people rep
resenting American reporters, locked
in a room with no backdoor, and
will be obliged to answer their cues
lions without giving them any IN
formation. He will be expected to
keep genial during the interview,
and to cali the newspaper men
boys" talking at great length on
each question in such a manner that
thew will be able to write 'nly
short paragraph when thew get back
to their papers. When asked What
he thinks of prohibition, contestant
must be able to affect an amused
expression aad shrug shoulders.
And finally he must be able to
stand in front Of movie camera
and pose for the news EDITORIALS. talk
ing off and putting on his hat,
glancing coyly to one side as If some
one were calling to him, shaking
hands with a secret service man
whom he has never seen before, and
patting 'laddie boy"
And the man who can pass all
these tests deserves to be allowed
to stay at home.