Perth Amboy evening news., 1921-06-10
BITS OF BYPLAY
By Luke McLake.
Copyright 1890. by The Cincinnati Enquirer.
Strange!

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Strange!
The ice man is a funny guy.
In fact, he often makes me sigh;
For, while he always makes me pay.
! know he gives his ice a weigh.
OUGHT
What is a long time loan?" asked the Old
SWoll, there's that book you borrowed from
me about four years ago. for instance" re-
piled the Crouch.
Firms Is Firms.
No wonder a certain grocery store in Klon-
dyke. Ohio, is always crowded with women,
1. N. Tice runs the place. n
wuhi
The man in the moon I can't resist,
He is a cheerful guy, by 5ings!.
I know he must be an optimist,
He's always making light OF Things.
His Motto.
We were interviewing the candidate who was
And what is your favorite motto ?" we asked.
"'Put Yourself in His Place." replied the
candidate.
The official rat killer of the Names Is Names
Club is going to visit the house at 1880 Wabash
avenue, Ft: WAYNE, Ind, to see what can Do
Is That So?
The hen said: Mans a helpless mutt,
For knowledge he should beg;
A man can lay a carpet, but
He cannot lay an egg!'
Demanding Full Credit!
1.-THE evidence shows that you threw a nrlck
at this Englishman," said. the Police Court
1T shows more than that. yer Honor!" re-
piled Hogan. ut shows that I hit him."
w., u-o,- u,vnV
I'd like to choke this Johnny Joint,
And some day ! will do 1t;
He always seems to make a point
OF never coming to It..
Firms Is Firms.
Live & Let have a drug store in Savanna,
Tenn,
Cheer Up!
We do not know much, but we do know that
if you are healthy you haven't any KICK COM
And vet some big, husky guy. who never
had an ache or a pain and doesn't. know whetn,
be terribly happy if he was In the place OF
some dyspeptic old geezer who can't walk ana
has to ride around in a 12-cylinder omo
Dusty Miller.
The Chorus Girl.
A chorus girls sure hard to gauge,
When you see her work on the stauge.
You think she can boast
OF 16 at most, -
But 60 is more like her auge.
Something Wrong!
If everybody wanted prohibition, and vol
steadism is such a good thing why are nine
men out Of ten defying the law and holding II
to ridicule? How many men do you meet In
a day who will admit that they voted t dry:
of the Eighteenth Amendment every day? why
is it that good citizens who respect and abide
states: "Thou Shalt Not Drink?' We have
given prohibition a fair test. 1t is worse than
a failure. 1t is a Joke.
Alta Boyi
The manager of an inland summer resort IN
Massachusetts at which there was a pathins
beach, advertised for two men to act as lire
savers at the beach. A big raw-boned youth
from Vermont applied for the job. He was
seven feet one inch tall, and looked tailer De-
cause he was so narrow.
'Can you swim 2" asked the manager.
Nav" replied the young giant. :" don't
hafta swim in this y'ere lake. kin wade IKE
Hi"
Learn One New Thing Each Day.
Bear in mind in case an argument comes up
The question has been decided officially. IA
dunn is not a mineral, 1t is a salt.
You Win,
Yonkers refers to it as the Eternal Revenue
Department.
Giddap!
Rhoda Steed, of Petersburg, Va, wants us 10
get her a job as jockey at the Latonia race
track.
Our Daily Special. .
Some Men Won't Yield to Anything Except
Temptation.
Luke McLNke Says
Even when the babies he used to know get
married and have babes of their own, a man
hates to admit that he Is getting OLD.
Even after a man sees how much harness.
his wife wears he is willing to believe that the
other fellows wife has her own natural figure.
If a woman looks like forty. guess her age