The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1921-07-28
The Diary of a Pale Blue Ass.

July 22-Awoke at a. m. Unable to go
back to sleep for some time but finally man
aged it after considerable tossing and twisting.
Up at Z. Quiet day. Took an hours nap in
the afternoon. Am having vacation but do
not appreciate it. Bed early.
July 23-Awake again at o'clock. Same
business of tossing and twisting, for which
T. L. w H t. D. m. S. chided me somewhat.
Don't understand Why l do not sleep when 1
have nothing else to do Suffer no discomfort
from my arm at all. My conscience is reason
ably clear; but persist in waking at o'clock.
|. =. At my typewriter this afternoon knocking
out colyum for Monday. Had no idea my
left hand useful. In a few weeks I
should be able to operate two typewriters sim
ultaneously. Bed early.
July 24-Awake at the usual hours
O'Clock. Back to sleep for few minutes, then
arose and hed myself to the bathroom where
my trusty left arm gave me further cause for
pride Stropped my safety razor blades then
did fair job of shaving. Net result: a smooth
face-with the exception of two small hicks
in the chin. Later posing the Statue of
Liberty, achieved a satisfying bath. Went to
Broadway church because it was nearer the
base of operations. DR.. Stevenson (after the
services) advised me to avoid Sunday school
picnics in future. Just now 1 am willing to
abide by that advice. To Long View park this
afternoon where I found real entertainment in
listening to the marvellous whistler with the
Elks' band. Later rode to the Watch Tower
but did not enjoy myself Took the Young
Rufhan on the merry-go-round. HE liked it,
Home early and to bed. All the mosquitoes
IN the WOTlQ COHSIeBdLeQ just OUTSIDE the bed
room window for a mass attack on the screen.
Made me nervous 1 feared the screen might
not withstand their vicious assaults. .
Sleep at last.
July 25-Awoke and looked at my watch 1t
was-yes, it was o'clock. A glance at the
bedroom window disclosed the mosquito array
still making fruitless assault upon my screen
defense. Heaven pity mankind when some
Teutonic mosquito discovers the efficacy of poi
son gasi =. Up at $50 To the Office at
7:45 with my copy. AS 1 FASTENED to the
front of an Elm street to alight my coat
blew back off my right shoulder. AS l endeav-
ored to wrap my left arm around my neck to
reach it young lad (about IA, 1 judged) hur-
ried up behind me and placed the wayward
garment back where it belonged. 1 thank
him again for his thoughtful courtesy Ten
to one he is a Boy Scout Watched the
Laying" of the cUlyum stones, then came
home Tapped out tomorrow's colyum this aft
ernoon in record time A headache. which as
sailed me yesterday morning, seems growing
worse tonight. To bed early, feeling punk
Did not trouble to reconnoiter for MOSQUITOES
July 26-F1ve o'clock again! Is there 1
wonder, some disembodied spirit siroliverlodg-
ing me at that hour each morning. If so, why
should 1t, she or he pick a skeptic? Up at
6. The headache gone, for which l am grateful.
To the office at s. Home again at noon Sprint
ed two blocks to catch an Elm street chariot
caught it-and damned the heat; not audibIy
however. lady sat right behind me.
This afternoon as l compiled my lefthanded
colyum The Lady Who Hates to Darn my
Il wish l had something in the shape of a
lemon besides husband" The wittiest retort
could think of was Ring Lardner's fayorite
:oneoack, is mat So! Sometimes l won
der II 1t IS best that a colyum conductor be
wouldn't think of saying SO out |
side of this diary. :. Early to bed A mos |
quito was in the bedroom somewhere but we !
couldn't find him.
LADY TO DO HOUSBWORK IN
family of four in the country with modern |
conveniences- Good wages. J. F. Orth
Seaton, Ill, Route Monmouth Atlas
AS what, frinstance?
ALEDO Opera House. Saturday, July 3oth |
md Monday, Aug. LIST Body and Soul featur
ng Alice Lake-Ad in Aledo Democrat.
MY dear, you MUST see herr
"OI.D Muscle Shoals Lobby STEERING Eord y
-Chitrib. 0Au
SSoIHlNG; anybody can steer ford !