davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The New York herald., 1921-01-23

"Oh, my God!" groaned old Mr. Opdyke
well, anyway said Hood Gubbings
hopefully "he can pick up plenty while he's
over here, to take back with him for the
home trade. We won't charge him export
duty on works of art that are more than
fifty years DID,
Sure" said Mr.. McCann. Were generous
al right in this country. We'd give away
our shirt. We started out with thirteen col
onies and freedom, didn't we? And all We
got left now Is the number 49,"
THAT isn't paradox said Toliver Per-
kins. sternly "That's superstition"
"a superstition" said Walter Jings, sis
truth that howls around the house at night"
MY wife believes in superstitions," said
Mr.. Gubbings stoutly. Amt it q paradox
that woman will believe in anything but
the TRUTH"
II dunno" said Harvey Maple, trifle
sadly. MY wife believes I'm a great man.
I don't know whether you'd call that a
paradox or just desperation"
The secretary of the club shuddered
slightly, then spoke. Although it is well
known that misfortunes never come singly,"
he whispered, "single men often marry"
II commence to get you. / think" said
Mr.. O'shaughnessy, breaking silence. "A
paradox Is that figure of speech that makes
two and two equal five. Am I right?"
"It doesn't matter" said Walter Jings
Keep on telling the truth and eventually
youI be hung for q liar Widowhood isn't
the only thing that's revealed by veil.
Early to bed and early to rise is one Of the
rules at the poorhouse- Remember Jim2
He was so worthless that he married money;
his wife was so perfect that Jim took to
drinkin' and Mrs. Jim was so crazy about
him that she run Off with bootlegger and
then Jim said it was lesson to him. and
he reformed. dunno: the older I get the
more think the strongest thing on earth
is a baby
my niece is 1s now. and lookin' forward
to the time when she'll be old enough to
wear short skirts. like her mother. She's
almost old enough to believe In Sanity Claus
The New York herald., 1921-01-23
MIR. Chesterton's Ar
rival From England
Gives the Members
a Weighty Subject,
Even if Pounds Are
Not What They
Used to Be
By SAMUEL mccoy.

TT Just shows" remarked Walter Jings,
at the latest meeting Of the Innocent
Bystanders Club, .that when folks
get an idea about anything once fixed in
their heads they hate having it removed
just like a tooth. 1t may be an idea that 8
all wrong. at the root, but il anybody tells
'em it ought to be pulled they think they
ought to call the police"
What's hurting you now?" asked Harvey
G. Maple.
Mr. Jings looked grieved. Hes not fat,
after ALL" he said.
"Whos not fat?" Old Mr.. Opdyke.-who
weighs much. bristled up at the remark
"Chesterton," said Mr.. Jings.
"Whoozat2" asked Mr. Opdyke.
Don't YOU read English?" retorted Walter.
He's that big English writer you simp, that
just came over from Dover to give us the
twice over. He was supposed to weigh
about 4OO The papers have been kidding
him about it for years"
-Four hundred" said old Mr.. Opdyke. I'll
say he's a big author, all right"
YES" said Mr.. Jings, but when he landed
he turned out to be as thin as Bill Taft 1t
was an awful blow"
Give him chance" said James Mccain,
kindly. "A pound amt what it used to be in
London. You got to allow for the deprecia-
ton"
Eyes" pursued Mr.. Jings, 'but the report
ers that met him said he seemed to have
lost lot Of his paradoxes, too"
"You don't say sol" calculated old Mr..
Opdyke. "Darned if they don't operate for
almost anything, nowadays!"
Mr.. Jings grunted scornfully. You don't
operate for a paradox. he explained, "you
go to an oculist. Anyway. the reporters said
he didn't have any to hand out when they
met him."
What are they?" demanded Mr. opdyke.
English cigars?"
Harvey G. Maple condescended to explain.
Its something with kick to IT," he said.
mo wonder he couldn't bring it on shore. y
observed Horace Gubbings bitterly.
Nav, that's not IT," said Mr.. Jings. "A
PARADOX is wise crack about something
that wears Disguise"
"Oh, get you'll" said Mr.. McCann. ITS
the sentence a holdup man gets.
mol" roared little Mr.. Jings. mol"
"well, you needn't get so hot about 1t" re-
turned Mr.. McCann hastily. Il was only
thinking that a wise sentence about some-
thin that wears a disguise---"
"Shut up!" shrieked little Walter Jings.
What Walter means, Jim." explained
Harvey G. Maple kindly, rs that paradox
il sort Of like short order of philosophy
with paprika on the side. This Chesterton
has been servin' them out for years. He's
the OK that pulls the paradox-just for a
yoke"
The New York herald., 1921-01-23

amortizc our Investment have convinced the
department that II wouldn't pay.
The department also for time contem-
plated the development OF power in Croton
at Cross River and Croton Falls aqueduct.
but no proposition of the several that have
been diligently studied looked good enough
financially to warrant going ahead They
were all dismissed on account of the short
time that will elapse before we get the extra
water from Esopus Creek.
ut would not pay to bring power from
Croton to Manhattan. II we could sell
power at Croton to any of the subsidiary
companies OF the Edison that would be
financially a good proposition. Unfortu-
nately II does not appeal to these companies.
That there Is an economic waste I
frankly state as an engineer, and in the
same capacity. that Of engineer. have roc
cmmended to the State Legislature the ad-
visibility OF giving the department the legal
right to develop power and sell II.
THE plan OF pumping water down from
Croton directly into the city has been under
consideration for several years. Whether
1t ever comes or not is up to the Board OF
Estimate and Apportionment.
I'VE could pump Croton water by using
catsxill power and save sa40 day"
BY doing this II is understood that the
expenses OF the present pumping stations
would be cut down or done away with en-
tirely. The shutdown win occur anyway
when the 225,o0o,0oo gallons daily come
down from the Schoharie watershed.
The New York herald., 1921-01-23

nowadays, but there's no place like home;
you can't tell it from barroom. The
Inauguration Day profiteers down at Wash
ington aren't going to be allowed to make
capital out of the Capitol on March A. and
they'd only make enough to buy one bottle
anyway
Little orphant Prohibition has come to
our house to stay. and it looks like the
goblets will git you, eff you don't watch out.
The old habit of treating to drinks is gone
forever, and the doctors are busy treating
for drinks. You can't deport the Irish, but
you can decant lots Of Scotch. It's only love
that makes the world go round, nowadays;
but If that's so, there must be lot OF kick
The New York herald., 1921-01-23
Plenty of Additional Water viii Soon
Be Available From the CatskiIfs

''The department has studied the plan or
o generating station for pumping the Croton
water into the Catskill aqueduct with the
power so generated 1t gave up the idea
because ir Ave years we will get additional
water from the Catskills amounting to
225 1000 900 gallons daily. through the devel-
opment of the Schohare watershed.
when that happens the department will
shut down its pumping stations, and Il
wouldn't pay to make this development for
that short time. II is possible also that be-
tween now and FIVE years hence we might
have a series of low rainfall years which
would cut of the flow that is now over
running the dam.
These things have been carefully gone
over and all the expenses. taken into con-
nection with the fact that we shall have to
The New York herald., 1921-01-23

IL has no power to sell 1t and IL 1t ever gets
that power from the Legislature II won't
know where to find customers. But be-
lieve a plan viii be found whereby the city
can receive a revenue from its excess OF
water"
To impress the Legislature with this
possibility tentative effort was made to And
out IL there would be a market for the ex-
cess. Manufacturers were requested TO send
IL list of their requirements in the way os
power and 1t was expected that a great num-
Der of them would comply. But one small
concern did reply. It anticipated doing a
little mining near Croton and it's needs were
not great. AS n speeder up Of legislation
this tentative effort was a failure
There is so far as have developed one
by the overflow could bring revenue to
the city. Electrical power could be fur
nished the Edison Company through its lines
that extend to Croton. An immense saving
OF coal would thus be effected while the rev.
enue to be derived would be considerable. II
all seems quite easy but for one insuperabe
obstacle"
Engineer Brush smiled and waited 20 be
asked what this obstacles consisted Of. Then
said he:
1.-THE obstacle in the way is this. the
Edison Company is in the market to sell
electricity, not to buy it,
II was suggested that this company might
find II cheaper to get its electricity I'm this
way without necessarily having to increase
rates TO che consumer.
-sPossibly so,' replied Mr.. Brush. "l am
not prepared to say anything for the COM
pany. II knows its own balance sheet ana
an outsider doesn't.
The New York herald., 1921-01-23

consequence OF the nlsn average
"A rainfall Of the year 1920 Greater
New York is losing 12o, 900 900 gal
Ions Of water daily. That is the
average amount Of water that rushcs over
the Croton spillway every day in the year
and does nobody any good At the metred
thirteen cent rate the loss in money may
be figured at $4,000 day.
At first glance this seems like a shameful
waste In reality it isn't waste at all;
the city loses nothing by the water that goes
over the dam because nobody wants that
water. What nobody wants as gift or for
a price is i'm either high or low economies,
worthless.
The citizens of Greater New York could
| have twice as much water as they use now
and not exhaust the resources of the Croton
and Catskill water sheds. AS II Is these citi-
zens waste lot of the water that passes
through the mains and they are not at all
concerned with what runs to waste before
| II ever reaches a main.
Problem of Profit From Surplus
Water Is Yet to Be Solved
There Is no sale for this extra supply OF
water" remarked Nicholas J. Hayes, Com
missioner OF Water supply Gas and Elec-
trfcity. Moreover, we have no legal power
10 sell IL. The department engineers are
interested in plans to pump the escaping
stream back into the Kensico reservoir to
be held in case Of an emergency; in the
event that these plans mature and are car
ried into effect the money spent i'm the
various pumping stations OF the system
might be saved, but even then there might
be no positive saving as additional funds
would be required for this work When
the studies that are In progress are con-
cIuded then we will start comparing costs"
To the lay mind ever SO many avenues
seem to open for the sale OF this abundant
fluid transformed TO energy. Why should
. not be harnessed to do the public business?
why is not this power used In the city,
utilities7 Would it's flow over turbine harm
the water. rendering II unfit for other pur.
posos7 A dozen questions rise In the afore-
1aid lay mind which the engineers have no
trouble To dispose Of.
| Deputy Chief Engineer William W. Brush
1isposed Of some OF these easily. He said:
Speaking a. IN engineer. deplore the
waste you refer to and number Of engin-
eering minds besides those In the Water
Supply Department are engaged In thinking
of how 10 solve the problem. II is difficult
pne; the city has something to sell although
The New York herald., 1921-01-23

The daily aggregate consumption Of water
within Greater New York exceeds 660. .O00. 900
gallons. including the 100000 gallons daily
furnished by the private water companies OF
Brooklyn. Richmond and Queens The city
according to these figures supplies somewhat
over 100 gallons to every citizen. Figures
given above show that the Croton. Byram.
Bronx and Catskill watersheds may, with
average rainfall be reasonably counted on 20
yield together at least 750,000000 gallons
daily. This means, in the language of En-
gineer Brush that every citizen has twice
the water required for his needs.
cafskW Water Distributed by
Power of Gravity Only
CatslSil water is being used to nearly the
full present capacity Of the Catskill aqueduct,
because through its greater pressure II con.
stitutes the least expensive OF the supplies
to operate. AT the present time about three
fifths OF the water New York uses Is Catslill
and two-fifths Croton.
water as can be distributed by gravity and
no further substantial amount OF Croton
could be used except after pumping to give
adequate pressure. For this reason the de-
partment selects Croton water as the excess
water which shall run to waste.
The spiliway of the Croton is 1850 feet
wide and six inches OF water Is now flowing
over the top. dropping 100 feet and flowing
into the Hudson. At present conditions are
The New York herald., 1921-01-23
tys Daily Loss of $l33000 in Water Sets Engineers Fg

Ions from subsidiary reservoirs in The Bronx
and 20,000.000 gallons overdraft on CatslSil
making total average daily consumption OF
675,00o,o00 gallons.
Some details concerning the use of the
water from the Croton River may prove IN
teresting. All this water that is used in
parts Of Manhattan and The Bronx elevated
forty feet or so must be pumped to give it
adequate pressure. About 5000, 900 gallons
daily are normally being pumped for this
purpose M the departments two pumping
stations one At Harlem River and 18TH
street and the other at Columbus avenue and
Ninety-eighth street. small amount OF
Croton water is also pumped in certain
wards OF Queens and Richmond for use on
the highest grounds OF those boroughs.
Water Pressure in Manhattan
Undergoes Great improvement
Since the introduction Of the Catskill sup
ply water pressures in Manhattan have
undergone great Improvement The Borough
ot Manhattan. constituting the old city OF
New York, had until 1912 no general water
supply system. The present city OF New
York is the result OF consolidation in 1925
OF two great cities and various adjacent com
munities Their water supplies were de-
veloped without regard TO the present city
limits and Il was not until 1917 that New
the city as a whole.
Definite steps were taken IN 1909 to for
mulate and execute such plan. In that year
a commission of engineers was appointed.
which. after careful study. recommended
that the city go TO the Catskills for add
tional water. In 1905 the Board OF Water
Supply was created by act OF Legislature
and at once proceeded to mpound the
waters OF the Esopus, watershed in the
Catskilis on which tho city planned TO draw
and for delivering the supplies OF water
throughout New York city.
The Catskill system was successfully
completed and turned over TO the Depart
ment OF Water Supply for operation In
1917. This department is not to be confused
with the Board OF Water Supply. Gas and
Electricity The latter named board is now
engaged in developing another OF the Cats
kill watersheds. the Schoharie From this
new shed It is expected that the city will
draw 25o.oooooO gallons daily. bcginning
with the year 1924.
with normal rainfall" said Deputy CHIEF
Engineer Brush, there will always be some
water overflowing the Croton reservoir.
safe flow Is estimated al 336,000.ooo gallons
a day and the so-called normal fow Is 400,
100000 gallons daily. Estimating for sue
cession OF dry years we call a safe flow
CSC. 900 gallons daily
The overflow of Croton is likely 10 con
tnue all winter and into May or even
June. Should there fall heavy frost tho
flow would drop at once and with Ions
continuance OF This frost 1t might stop alto
gether."
The New York herald., 1921-01-23

in it. The wetness OF drought is more ter
rible than the dryness of champagne.
Gentlemen" cried Tolliver Perkins,
chairman of the house committee. rapping
for order. at has been moved that we in
vite Mr.. Chesterton to address the club Do
1 hear any seconds?"
Lave him comet" said Mr. OShaugh-
messy heartily. Hes so full Of truth it will
be a pleasure to correct him"
The New York herald., 1921-01-23
Six Snap Shots in America

There's Riches-once Ambassador--he' s
proud by right"
l see your face change-when you're quite
alone,
And utter WEAKNESS well in your eyes:
The nation asks your counsel in great things
But tell me OF your son--does he write home
iii. GANCSTER.
He. who had lived in great city by the sea,
In great nation pledged to give all men
An equal opportunity to rise. be free,
And who had from his birth lived in a den
Unspeakably squalid; where, to live at all,
Men robbed. and women sold themselves for
food,
And some his friends. preyed upon womeps
fall
slouched at the docks one day as huge
liner
Disgorged its living. who for days had stunk
Within the steerage: out they came; finer
Procession Of poor fools, with all their junk
He'd never seem One made him laugh
= Poor cuss,
He stopped and kissed the ground, all full of
hope!
The gangsters snickered: "Gct that Thofs
the dope
Americas future'" Nix" said he
watch asi"
The New York herald., 1921-01-23
L. ALIEN.

Poor woman from Eief whom see cross
the Square
With your great bundle poised upon your
head
Walking erect--I know the home you seek:
One room; six feet by ten where there's dry
bread
And maybe gaslic; there your babies wait,
They're sick, sometimes but oftener they
crow,
/ know your aim, and therefore your proud
gait,
Beneath that load. is easier to know:
Men make democracies, or call them So
Women pay tribute to an older State
III. AMBASSADOR.
Proud tall old man whose shrewd eyes fight
in vain
Against the wrinkled pouches underneath
/ see you rising every day at dawn,
Worn. from a bed where darkness brought
no sleep;
See your manservant make you young with
clothes.
With the red button in your left lapel
Watch you walk down the street. and hear
men gaze
The New York herald., 1921-01-23
v. LEADER.

l look for you, but nowhere have / found
YOU
Though you may be within the struggling
mob
That shrieks and raves beneath the weights
that bound you
zone time) to acquiescence with bitter
job:
Surely you're not within the secret" meet
ing,
Where hopeless men grope stupidly, that
chains may fall?
How shall vision YOU, when you're 80
fieeting
Shifting your home. from digniifed town
hall
TIC laborers' sordid forums and to palaces?
You are the rioter: you are the club of
Law:
You, the profaner; and. no less Gods chal-
ices
vi. BABY.
Why is life "all right? Because you've
not yet tried it;
Because your mothers happy when she
Because it will be long before your lips
deride it:
Because so many things are vet for you
to do;
Acknowledge that some end up worse than
when they started
Acknowledge that most women get rotten
deal:
Admit that friends meet only to be parted
And that some honesty is down at heel:
Still. in the whole long line OF human his
tory
Yours is the only life that's not yet done.
What will you do? Ah. there's the mystery
And, spite of all the past. there's all the fun,
The New York herald., 1921-01-23
ii. AMBASSADOR.

spnwy
h tn
The New York herald., 1921-01-23
Nobody Knows What
It's All About, but
Everybody Explains
1t in Full With Many
Vivid Illustrations
Drawn From Per-
sonal Experiences
Nv. PRESIDENT.

Had not known you, long before the crowd
Hooted behind your back and sneered and
spat;
Had not known you long before this day
When all the nation has gone wild with
praise
And hangs on your least word as on
gods
Then I'd be like the rest and call you great"
But know better; remember you
When you lived with us all in this old town
Where naples arch the streets; you never
fretted;
Yoy lost your mother there and aged some
what;
You smiled when fortune took your bottom
dollar
And helped old Billy when his boy went
There's nothing in your life to make fuss
Of;
You're just man But still ,ce miss
you, here!
The New York herald., 1921-01-23
Experts Seek Way to Make Tangible Asset Out
of l2O,OOOOOO Gallons Overflow Running
to Waste From Croton Reservoir

S a consequence Of the high average
rainfall Of the year 1920 Greater
\ New York is losing 2o,ooo,ooO gall
Ions Of water daily. That is the
The New York herald., 1921-01-23

r. T just shows" remarked Walter Jings,
at the latest meeting Of the Innocent
4 Bystanders Club, "that when folks
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1921-05-12
A Little More
about Insurance

| wish to say to my friends and
policy holders and prospective pat
rons that there is no question
about the quality of Insurance put
out IN my Office. All companies
have been tried and tested for
years, and have many living and
enthusiastic policy holders. Many
policy holders have had losses and
been paid by company. Did you
ever hear Of any one who was not
satisfied, in case of loss? Some
agents sell experimental policies
cheap but cannot show forty years
business record and no lawsuits
or dissatisfaction. Just at this
time the company is extending
payment of notes coming due to
policy holders who have never be-
fore asked extra time on their
notes; and company pays losses in
cash, and no discount for cash.
Talk about it not taking money to
run insurance business! It takes lots
Of money. Over $4,000, 900 worth
OF property burned up in Iowa; in
1920. The agent who writes your
insurance ought to be able to point
out all the conditions of your policy
contract and explain to you why
the contract with you and COM
pany is worded like it is; andwhy
it is necessary to have those condi-
tions in the policy, to do business
with all classes of policy holders.
II your agent cannot explain his
contract to you, you'd better do
business with a company's agent
who can. If you do not under
stand, it is the agents place to in
form you. He shouldn't ask your
patronage and take your money
when he doesn't give you value re-
ceived for what you paid him, and
his company. Beware of agents
who promise cheap insurance and
cannot back it up with good loss
paying record for honorable deal
ing with their patrons.
THEO PATTY,
Phone g.,
Extra, Iowa.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1921-05-12

Mr.. and Mrs. Looney have de-
clded to return to Iowa to locate
and have purchased property in
Atlantic, where they moved their
belongings last week. They were
former residents of near Extra, be-
fore moving to Kansas sometime
ago.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1921-05-12

Mrs. Sturgeon is expected home
tomorrow from Eldora, Iowa, where
she has been spending the winter
with her daughter, Mrs. Idah
Moffet.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1921-05-12

Mrs. o. A. High and children
leave here Saturday morning to re-
turn to their homestead near
Teckla, Wyoming. Mr.. High went
last week by auto, arriving at his
destination, in fine shape. He ex-
poets to return to Iowa, to secure
similar position to the one he held
here as station agent, but is unde-
cided yet where he will locate.
Friends wish the family all kinds of
good luck and prosperity.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1921-05-12

The Woman's Community Asso-
citation will serve supper at the M.
p. Church Saturday evening May
.21st. 35c per plate.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1921-05-12

Oscar Jensen and family were in
Extra over Sunday, visiting at his
parental home.