The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1921-07-09
BALLAD OF CAPT. SHUGG.

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BALLAD OF CAPT. SHUGG.
Captain Roland Paget Shugg recently was
married in New York;
o many many names I've seen
Which brought chuckle to my throat;
The mem'ry of them all is green
And often have paused to note
The names that through my fancy float,
But now pass them with snrue-
I've found name that gets my goat:
IT'S Captain Roland Paget Shugg!
lot of monickers, I ween,
Would never get single vote:
For instance there is Bunker Bean,
About whom What shisname once wrote,
And many others l might quote
But wait a moment, lift lug
I've found name that gets my goat:
TITS Captain Roland Paget Shugg!
Toward the man I have no spleen,
have no wish to rock his boat;
1 hope his married Iife's serene,
Although l DO not care a groat
For him only love TO pote.
But, gosh! it gives my heart tug
I've found name that gets my goat:
IT'S Captain Roland Paget Shugg!
l. ENvOI.
Prince! Bring to me my hat and coat;
I'm going out to buy jug!
I've found a name that gets my goat:
'Tis Captain Roland Paget Shugg!
QUOTATION marks are an eyesore to us
in many cases but can't approve the style
of the Geneseo Republic. That paper, in re-
printing dialogue jokes from various publica-
tions, omits all quotation marks
COULD you, by the way. approve para
graph which begins and ends with the same
words? Or could you?
The Damages, understand, We're Caused by
the Damaging Fire Which Damaged
the Building.
From the Davenport Times
Several thousand dollars worth of
damages were caused in fire which
damaged the Bettendorf candy kitchen on
East State street. Bettendorf, this
morning.
RUSSIA" writes the efervescing Arthur
Brisbane, once stood, like great unconquer-
able feather bed, between Asia and Western
Europe"
What would you conjecture is more un-
conquerable than feather bed? (To Rio: You
might enter Arthurs contribution in the smile
contest)
Our COngrats to Mr.. Harris!
bushnell Corr, Galesburg Republican
RegisterD
The following births have been re-
ported for record by DR.. J. P. Roark
Arthur E. Inman, May "a; John Henry
Geves, June ri; Mildred Catherine Grit
fifth. June %, and City Clerk B. S. Harris
made the record.
THE obit reporter reports that he met Miss
Mabel Wunder of Davenport t'Other evening.
Wonder if he'd care to meet the Early sisters,
Ruth and Verna of Annawan, ILL.,? Or per-
haps he'd be drawn more toward Miss Elody
Cartoon, who appears daily IN Atkinson, ILL.,
The Diary of Pale Blue Ass.
July up at usual time To work at usual
time. This is the day some persons celebrate
the signing of the Volstead act. l celebrated
il BY working which is safer and saner-if not
aS Home abOut 3 20 Went
the Rock Island station with friends at
10. They left on the 1880 train for Omaha.
Sorry to see them go, Home and to bed at
IL. Tired-gosh! I'm tired.
July Sup early Hot Felt Rotten. Had
a ridiculous dream last night Dreamed l
ewoke just night prowler had
ceeded in pulling half way through the
window Why anyone should want to kidnap
me passes all understanding and why The Lady
Who Hates to Darn my Socks should siren
uously object was also bit of surprise; for
in my dream she tightly hugging my legs,
vociferant in her verbal lambasting OF the
BLACKBOARD who would attempt to steal her
liege lord. Long day at the office. Hotter
than ever. Damn!
July 6-Up at 6. Still hot These days one
could almost envy those so-called unfortunates
mentioned in Dante's Inferno who were con-
demned to remain for eternity frozen in a lake
of ice. They'll never bleat about the heat,
at least. Another long day. My contrib
utors seem to believe L actually like to write
this colyum myself The Spuds came again
Ills evening anu we got d DTtdLu OIL air Wnll6
riding around in their car. Miss Spud seems
TO have fallen deeply in love with me, but 1
am not embarrassed, nor do l fear the jeal-
ousy of The Lady Who. etc. Little Miss Spud
is Il BELIEVED 4 years old The Young Ruff
fan, however shows glints of green in his
eyes and hastens to lay claim to his share of
my affections. =. A world without children
would be habitable as Death Valley
Home late and to bed.
July 7-"Goodness. It's O'clock was
the first thing l heard this morning. Query:
Is. is not. an alarm clock more dependable
than woman? We do not use an alarm clock
Late at the office but not too late The
L. W. H. t. D. m. S. phoned that our daughter
had written from Lake Geneva Wis, which gave
me a shock, as she supposed to be in
Geneva Ill. The matter was explained. how
ever. Friends and automobile had kindly
kidnapped her and "gramma" ~ wonder
if she has spent that $100.05 yet. Home
early. To bed early.
"I4AWLESS Abuse of Negro" was the can
ton of editorial in the adjacent columns
tother evening; which stirs in US a mild Gu |
rfosity TO know what constitutes a lawful |
abuse Of the negro.
mn IJE pPEAE prrnpn