The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1921-04-06
Dorothy Dix Talks
Teaching a Child Deocit-2.
BY DOROTHY DIX
Worlds Highest Paid Woman Writer.

+ Teaching a Child Deccit-2.
There is a common phrase among
women that is at once pitiful and
sardonic. 1t is: What a man doesn't
know, doesn't hurt him." and it means
that woman feels that she has a per-
feet right to purchase peace in the
household by as many lies and decep-
lions as are necessary to buy it.
Perhaps this is cynically true as far
as the woman herself is concerned.
Perhaps a woman is justified in out
whiting a crouch, or a tight-wad, or
tyrannica1 husband in any way she
can, but the effect of such a moral
standard is bound to be disastrous on
the children.
Children don't split hairs in logic.
They can't grasp half measures. No
mother can teach them to lie to father
and be truthful to her, to deceive
father and be frank with her. If
what father doesn't know doesn't
worry. him, what mother doesn't know
won't worry her. If children learn in
their youth that they can save them
selves unpleasant scenes by telling
falsehoods to father, they naturally
carry the same working principles into
general life. with the result that they
become that most futile and despised
creature, cheerful liar, whom no
body takes seriously.
\ There are plenty of families in
(which the mother pads the household
budget to get the money to give boy
what his father has refused him. and
in which the mother connives with the
girls in receiving attentions from men
of whom their father does not APP
prove; where the mother shows the
children how they can deceive their
father to escape punishment, or get
what they want.
OF course this teaches the children
to look upon their father as an enemy.
and one in whom it would be folly to
cCnfide.
1t also teaches them to regard their
mother as az woman of lax principles.
Children are ruthless in their judg-
ments, and they have little respect for
a mother whom they know to be a
time-server and a prevaricator, even
when her sins have been committed
in their behalf.
Aside from theirsmoral values. truth
and fra nkness are the handmaidens of
happiness and success in life Nobody
respects a liar or a doubledealer, or
wants to have anything to do with
them. No man wants to marry a girl
whom he cannot trust, and who will
carry on petty intrigueS behind his
back. No man wants to give his hon
or into the keeping of woman whose
pretty lips babble falsehoods, and
whose character is a dark web of
conceit.
Truth. and honesty, and frankness,
and candor are a tangible asset in
business. You can borrow money on
them at the bank. The man whose
word is as good as his bond can get
credit, and help, and backing in any
enterprise. and command a high sal
airy as a trusted employee
These characteristics must be bred
in children from their first conscious
ness. They are not a grace that can
be acquired later in life. and they can
never be taught as a side-line to de-
ceiving their father.
TheEefore, a woman might better
make a sacrifice of her own personal
pleasures, or have a thousand fights
with her husband, rather than teach
her children directly or indirectly to
lie to their father