The herald and news. [volume] (Newberry S.C.) 1903-1937, 1921-01-18

you We're young. HiiSiiSFeI Il o"S
puts up a job on me, and l feel my
self getting mad, recall some OF my
own exploits when l was q lad, ald
that enables me to forget my troubles.
Il was looking through an ancient
album last evening, and saw the pic
lures of lot OF people who fell Oil
the earth many years ago. They were
venerable men and women in my
schooldays. and I had played tricks
on every one OF them; rot with mail
ice aforethought, but just because
kid must have his fun.
There was a picture Of old Aunt
Betsy, who used to come 20 our house
once in while. on a yisH, and as soon
as she came she took charge Of every
thing. She knew how to do things
better than anybody else, and she was
always criticising my. mothers meth
DDS. Whenever mother started to Go
anything, Aunt Betsy would take the
job out of her hands, saying she would
show the right way to 90 it.
sT had heard somewhere that if you
put a drop or two Of acetic acid in
a gallon Of cream, that cream will
never make butter. had a great
memory for such facts, and kept them
on file where they would be useful.
One morning mother said she would
have to chGTn, and she got things
ready. 1 knew that as soon as she
started Aunt Betsy would want to
show her how it should be done, SO
when I had chance, l dropped some
of the acid Into the chHfn, which was
one Of those old upright affairs, with,
a Gsasher that you worked up and
down until the butter came.
s.AIother seated herself on a stool
and began churning, and then Aunt
Betsy came along, and said that while
she was a modest and. unassuming
woman, she did claim to know lit
tie more about cl,urping than anybody
Of her weight in that part of the,
country. let me do it, my dear said
she. and I'll have butter in seven
minutes by the clock So she took
hold Of the dasher and began slapplng
away with it. She worked and worked,
and the sweat began rolling down her
face. and every once in while she'd
lift the lid of the cEurn to see what
allied the doggone cream, and then
she'd pour in some cold water, ana
then some hot water, and the more
she wrestled away, the less sign OF
butter was there.
"She wnanged away at that ding
busted cliurm for two hours ana
couldn't get results. and she vas so
mad and disguised oycc it she want
ed to pack her trunk and go back
home. Mother saw me rolling around
in the yard ali doubled up with Tn
holv lnir1h. and she realized at once,
f:y deauctive reasoning, that I was
responsible, and the licking got that
evening took the edge off nay sense
of humoT for three weeks.
"Anotner tine. Uncle James was Wis
itins US. He used to sit in rustic
chair under an apple tree and doze'
after dinner. He had a bald head,
ard his hat always lid off after ne
n4d snored few times. One day 1
sncal,eG up behind him with feather
and began tickling his head. heu
slap his dome of thought and c''ss
a little. and then doze again. when
would get busy with the feather. That
ve-t on for quite while, and 1 was
having the time Of my life. L never
hear;! any language more highly COZ
ored than Uncle James put up.
My mother heard him saying
things. and came to the door and asked
him Whit vas the matter. and ne
said Il G;ns-donged lopsided fly was
chewing his scalp off. he had Chased
= ay.ay three million times, bot II al
WAYS car,e hack. I got another LICK
ing that night, and ny mind was &C.
crnied with serious things ior
month :"