Atlanta tri-weekly journal. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1920-19??, 1921-03-22
DOROTHY, DIX TALKS
Have a Heart, Girls!
BY DOROTHY DIX
Copyright, 1920, by the Wheeler syndi-
cate, Inc.

sport, which is planning their weddings and
buying their trousseaux.
In innumerable homes the floors are knee
deep in flmy fluttery lingerie, and mother In
growing haggard to decide whom to invite to
the church, and whom to the house; and
father is lying awake at night trying to 1gure
out how he is ever to pay the bills; and hosta
of helpless friends and acquaintances are
grooming aloud in their misery and sayinga
mabel Smiths wedding cards came today.
and we've got to send her a present, and there
goes my new hat. And needed it so badly!'
And everybody except the bride-elect hates
the whole miserable business, and thinks that
it is no wonder that marriage is so often a
failure when it is entered into with such an
amount of tom-foolery.
Now getting married is lot more solemn
and serious thing than dying Is, and why
people send out invitations to their friends
and acquaintance to come and see them mar
ried any more than they ask them to come
and watch them die, nobody knows. It would
seem that any decent soul would wish to be
as much alone as possible at it's most crucial
and terrible moment.
Few women feel this way abou. it, how
ever. Most of them desire, all the fuss antH
feathers, and noise, and hullabaloo they can
get, and to embark upon the holy estate with
a grand splurge.
From the time girl baby begins to think,
she commences to plan her wedding, and be-
fore she is cut out Of pig-tails she has decided
on whether she will have church weddinga
with a flower-girl and ring-bearer, or bel
married under a floral arch in the back parlor
at home.
Therefore, it is wrecking the dreams of her
life when you ask her to cut out all of the5
doo-dabs, and, when she finds the man to-
whom she gives her heart for keeps, just to-
with thAr@H
have the knot tied with neatness and dis
patch, and without any Of the work and worry,
and nervous prostration and debt and graft
that accompanies the usual marriage.
Nevertheless, do appeal to girls in behalf
Of humanity for a sane and sensible wedding,
and not to sacrifice their own families theirI
own futures and everybody they knew to the
qualification of their vanity.
I appeal to them to cut out the hold-up OF
showers and wedding presents. Because youI
are going to be married is no reason for levy-7
ing blackmail upon your friends, yet that Isl
precisely what wedding invitation does. TheI
big, square. white card is just much al
demand to stand and deliver, as q pistol
pointed at our breasts, and most Of us enter-|
tain about as cordial an opinion Of the oneI
as the other.
Don't do it, girls. Have heart. Tryl
to remember how many calls everybody hasI
upon their pocketbooks, and how Ill most
people can afford to make presents these days.
blessings will be rained down upon the head
of the bride who has declined to be show
cred with silk stockings, and embroidered
towels, and aluminium ware.
OF course you may say that this Is your
only chance to get even for the many, manyI
times that you have been forced to contributed
to other brides, but somebody has always|
got to be the leader of every reform move
ment, and the distinction and gratitude you
will gain by being pioneer in the no-present|
the loss of a few salt spoons, and imitation
Japanese vases.
Besides, the wedding presents are not all
gain. Always, most of the things appear toI
have been selected by your worst enemy in
her most vindictive mood, and it prof1teth al
bride nothing to have lot of junk for which,
she has no earthly use and no place in her
new home. Furthermore, they all have to bel
returned.
But most of all, think of father, and have
a neart. He has about all he staggerI
under now. Look how old, and worn, and
tired he is. Notice how quiet he is growing.
Are you willing, for the sake of trailing upl
church aisle in white lace and chiffon and
orange blossoms, to add another crushing
burden to those he already bears? Are you
willing to have him work longer hours to pay
for the flowers that are withered in an hour,
and the music, and the flummery of your
wedding reception? Will you enjoy wearing
the foolish and extravagant f1nery of your
trousseaux Wnen you remem Der that 1t has
been wrung out of his very life blood
have known plenty of men who were liter
ally ruined by their daughters weddings
They never got out Of debt. All of the ball
ance of their lives they were slaves, toiling,
harrassed, worn, trying to pay with years Of
labor for silly and selfish girls five minutes
parade up church aisle
Don't let your marriage call down a curse
upon your fathers old head, girls. You
know what he can afford to give you. Take
it, and ask for no more Let your last days
of girlhood be filled with consideration of
your parents, not of gouging the last thing
out of them that you can get.
Think Of the men you are going to marry,
girls, and have heart. A man Is very
helpless thing in the hands of the woman he
is In love with and is about to marry. He
is AFRAID to oppose anything she wants to
do, for fear she will think he is stingy; and
when she weeps, he becomes as pulp under
her tears.
Therefore, many sensible chap Is forced
into display wedding against his inclina-
ton and better judgment. He knows that
the money he has to spend for flowers ard
taxis, and presents to ushers and best man,
and a new dress suit, and foolish wedding
journey, should go into furnishing a little
home, but he hasn't the nerve to stand up
to the girl he is in love with, and fight her
to a finish and tell her that they will ba
married according to the way they have goe
to live, not at all.
For the wedding day is the brides day.
She is the pu1ssant one who decides every
thing for the community, for her family, and
for her husband-to-be. Therefore, I pray
her to have heart and be merciful to them
all.
DNTNTEN DAD ADIyc