Omaha daily bee., 1921-07-24
THE HUSKINGB BEE
Its Your Day
Start It With a Laugh
THAT'S DIFFERENT.

THAT'S DIFFERENT.
Within him every fellow has the bug OF camping
With his domestic nature it is blent,
And when vacation time arrives he'll give a
happy shout
And HE him to the dell to pitch his tent;
And there he'll sleep on boughs and tight the
For ] fourteen N days and nights and maybe
more,
Where all the hardships seem 10 him but
blessings in disguise
And sunburn doesn't even make HIM sore.
But when at home a fellow cannot stand the
untamed life,
4 wrinkle in the bed sheets sets him wild,
If fly gets in the kitchen he will lmpcate
his wife,
While burnt toast makes him pcevish as
Which proves that every fellow is Jekyl and
Hyde,
Two separate natures dwell within his dome,
When i'll winds come while camping out he'll
smile and let en- ride
But raise the roof about such things at home.
PHILOSOPHY.
1t is waste of time to tell the gang what a
swell time you had on your vacation They
won't believe it.
The easiest way to find trouble is to look
Tor it.
Strange paradox--the more pointess con-
versaton is the quicker it bores.
They say poverty isn't crime, and yet it is
punishable by hard labor.
THE WATERS FINE.
Omaha Chamber of Commerce Journal cx-
plains that patrons wishing to buy from the
Piggy Wiggly store enter, through a turn
stvle, pick up basket and wind through
tortuous and continuous isle" To which "Y"
wonders if patrons then have to swim home.
"How SOP
"They seldom catch anything"
Friend A. D. G.. busts into song which
contrary to his Cor her0 expcctations-breaks
into print-thusly:
(Same Old Stuff
really haven't any hope
OF breaking into print,
And even though l send the dope
Ny pay won't break the mint;
But this I'll say-Gll swear it, too),
The weather's most too awful hot,
If this keeps up then I'll just stew
Until I'm just grease spot!
A. D. G..
NOW ALL TOGETHER, THE CHORUS.
While Herb Hoover is drawing up a set Of
blue prints OF plans to end the housing shortage,
the Great American Society of Homeless
Orphans will continue singing the national
anthenl-"Ten Tonight
SH-H-H-H
Officers seize booze plant when they hear
liquor bubbling in boiler" We always had an
idea a booze plant was still.
Fih Stillman has gone away for rest. At
which information several million newspaper
readers sit up and give three hearty yawns.
HOME BREW FOOEISHNESS.
Josh my III walrus
I'm fraid he got in jail,
He got too gay and sassy
And fipped his Ill tail.
He twirlcd his roguish whiskers
And tapped his fipper fin,
And yet so sweet and gueless,
How could they run him in?
Have you sheen my iii warus?
You'd know him by his gait,
A sinuous rolling motion,
A wriggling hezhtatc.
I know some cop did spy him,
And thought his dance too crude,
And took him to the hooshgow
Now wouldn't that be rude?
And now I want my walrus,
I've Josh my iii pet,
Jus' one drink or maybe two,
Twas that made me forget
Sho if you shce my walrus
Jus bring him back to me,
I'll be waiting for him, MOSTLY,
With my arms around thish tree.
ID. M.
There has been a lot said about Hon. Andy
rously now, what is your honest opinion OF
man who would obliterate beer and chew plug
tobacco:
Jack Dempsey doesn't care whether the
bonus bill passes or not.
all her troubles when he knows blame we'll he
can't wear her shoes.
Fra sinks into department store and asks
for pair Of roll tops. Floor walker doesn't
know whether to conduct her to the office
furniture section or shoe her to the hosiery.
Patron: Critically Waiter, this plate you
brought ME has spot on it.
Waiter: (apoogetically) That isn't spot,
sir. That is the half portion OF steak you Or
dered.