The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1921-02-02


It's nIiips-though not postry, Of course.
But neither Is the stuff you sometimes write;
It's lust a meas of words arranged in rimes.
You'd best wake up and try to see the light,
Else some day you'll DO hanged for all these
crimes"
DETROIT man stood in his burning house
the other night tryiaG to think OF the most
valuable thing he might save. When his wife
and daughter, who had rushed out without
stopping to think were growing frantic he
finally emerged carrying "a huge portrait OF
President Wilson" Apparently no couldn't
think Of it
Apparently Hashimura Togo Has Entered
Tho Field Of Journalism.
(From the Washington. D. c., Times).
Secretary of War Baker has just
made what are regarded % the first
Official admission that Bergdoll is in
Germany.
THREE gunner entered Toronto jew
elry store knocked the proprietor loose from
his thinkiets and looted the place. The jew
elers name was l. Shoot But perhaps it
refers to craps-not firearms
LIMERICK NO. +
(As completed by its author, Helen.
You may guess on the growth of vine
Or the length Of small piece of Irvine,
But l surely opine
You'll not guess the last line
OF THIS LITTLE LIMERICK or NINE.
THE last word seems easy enough for us
to guess and we appear to express the idea in
tended by the various "limerlcists; but get
ting the exact words-well, the prospect OF
days vacation for US seems faint. Well. here's
another one; and We don't see how We can
miss this one:
LIMERICK NO 1.
entered by Eye Gee Ell; last line is ours).
1t looked like q bottle Of bond,
OF which I'm excessively fond.
But the bottom'd been drilled.
Then the bottled been filled
WITH THE LIQUID THAT'S FOUND
IN POND!
SPEAKING of the weather (although as
this paragraph is written it Is almost unspeak-
able) Odeekay relayed good wheeze to US
tho other day from his fayorite barber. He
should have written it down as We stfAightway
forgot it. 1t seems that Odeekay in his inimita-
BILE manner called the BARRIERS attention to
the lovely weather We were having since Mr.
Young took charge Of it. EYES," flashed the
barber. hes doing darn sight better than
the old weather man.
Dire Effect Of Mr.. Dowie's Batting In.
tFrom the Monmouth Atlas.
Dowie dented Madison Square garden
for month and proclaimed to the world
he was Elijah H.
TWO girl babies were born to two Cali
fornia mothers on the same day. The mothers
are twin sisters and each baby weighed the
same as did it, mother at birth. Now, how
the deuce do you suppose But it must DO
the glorious climate"
HOW D'YoU MEAN "vALUELEss"!
From the Davenport Democrat).
Red Oak, Iowa-TeFroH reigns here
because of Tom, the Hugger," who
Rugged and kissed ~ girls Wednesday
night. In cases the man entered homes
| by breaking bedroom windows where the
girls slept, stealing small valueless alti-
cles from each victim.
AT last reports the Red Oak correspondent
was headed due west, holly pursued by ~
irate young ladies.
THE first negro woman to be a candidate
for alderman in Chicago filed her petition the
other day. Odd that no paragrapher has vet
referred to her as dark horse" Perhaps
she will become if elected, nightmare to The
city council.
ACCEPT. SIR. OUR RENEWED
ASSURANCES"
II you want to hll your colyum with hilasity
You must substitute obtuseness for plain
4 clarity;
Assure Us that you're not
Talking simple salesman's rot
When you choose to hammer booze with such
| asperity ANON.
THE above lit is not limerick though at
hrst glance 1t appears to be one) came to us
unsigned, penciled on the white spaces of an
automobile I'D. We were net aware that We
had Hammered booze with such asperity, ;"
But. never mind. What we want to impress
on contributors il this: put SOME sort OF .
signature on your offerings. We don't care the
4 v. k. tinker's dam what name you gave the
census taker: We merely like to see monicker
attached to Z contribution.
IN the meantime. suppose you try ruess-
ing the last line Of the following standard form
Of limerick I've didn't write it, of course):
! There Was young lady, Amanda,
Whose Balladss Lynques were quite Nm Do
Steele. leam:
| But her Journal Intims
FOR SALE or TRADE Light ok 5-passen-
ger autos for hedge posts or hedge fences suit
able for posts. Box 20S WINFIELD. Kan.-Cap-
per's Weekly.
| Verify: many are the uses Of the gas buggy.