Omaha daily bee., 1921-11-12
The HUSKING BEE
Its Your Day
Start 1t With a Laugh
MY ROSARY.

MY ROSARY.
The hours I've spent in shoveling coal
count indeed total loss,
| They add no bank notes 10 my roll
Unto my larder bring no sauce;
And ah. It's just like burning cash
To see black diamonds turning white
As they reduce to worthless ash,
My anthracite, my anthracite.
Since thou vert taken from the earth
Thy values trebled, pom my soul.
What terms can now compute thy worth!
My load oi coal
Each day to keep the furnace hot
| count each scoopiul-going fast!
II fills me full Of grief TO wot
How quick you last, my coal. how quick you
Ny shining Jewels give me pause,
Pray tarry here, already yet
Thou'rt called "hard COAL" and that because
Thou'rt hard to get, gadzooks, thou'rt hard TO
get
PHILOSOPHY.
Some folks say to frown on trouble, but a
grin will Danish il quicker.
Speaking Of at bonus BILL il doesn't look like
1921 will reward fighters.
Woman who is suspected Of killing four hus-
bands is convicted in Idaho OF murder in the
SECOND DEGREE!
Well that's giving husbands rating Of about
one-eghth which is higher than jures usually
concede.
Carved Safe Brings $780, chirps news
item. But what we are particularly interested
in now is what an uncarved turkey is going to
bring.
HANDY WITH THE TINWARE
Dishwasher wants job Can also drive Ford
Want Ad.
GLAD PEEP.
As days advance
Eftsoon, we know
Well have chance
To shovel snow.
Big drive on next week for Father Flanagan's
Boys Home. Don't Overlook it'll
DON'T URGE HER.
When girl tells you she can't sing, it may
be modesty and then again, it may be the truth.
EVENING UP.
Omaha's death rate by automobile accident
shows an increase, according to government sta
tistcs But there was decrease in the number
Of deaths from old age.
If your coal gets low and the rooms feel
chilly, by attaching the thermometer to an cleo
trio light globe, the temperature may easily be
run up to 80 or 90 degrees.
**A
When beet drops cent a pound, wholesale,
a lot of consumers get excited and yell, Look
out below!'
SYMPATHY.
The butcher cried ut is shame
The prices that you have to standl"
And as he paused those words to frame,
The butcher weighed his good right hand.
Old Man Ouch advocates revolving door for
the home. Says could slip out while the
bill collector was sliding in.
With nothing between the crusts of a mince
pie but mince meat, Thanksgiving isn't what it
used to be-
Friend of ours decided to make the little old
overcoat do one more winter.
First evening he wore it downtown a bird
stopped him and asked him where the mas
querade was.
There is shade of difference between being
spoken of and being talked about.
r
Once in lifetime, perhaps, outside of fiction,
one will run across an ambitious young
man who would rather work for living than
marry girl with money
Rather than begin at the bottom and work
top and slide down.
AN EPITAPH.
Here lies at rest old Grocer Dan
No more he draws his breath,
We know he was an honest man
Because he starved to death.
"How did you make this coffee, dear"
II made it in my new electric percolator"
"Well, it's little weak. You better give it
another shock"
UNIMPORTANT ITEM.
The law prohibits a hunter from killing more
than Is ducks in one day, but fortunately it
doesn't require him to kill that many.
THE WORLD DO MOVE-IT
FAIRLY FLIES.
When 4o'ers left New York for the Califor-
MIA gold fields, travelling la carte, first news
they heard upon their arrival was that the Civil
war had been fought and won. When they got
back to New York with the stake, Bryan was
running for president.
Now II the shayeS