davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Morris tribune. [volume] (Morris, Minn.) 1880-2000, 1921-08-05

J. A. Thabes Caine is in Mime
apolis on business this week.
Morris tribune. [volume] (Morris, Minn.) 1880-2000, 1921-08-05

Mrs. P. H. Canty and daughter,
Ruth went to st. Paul on business
Wednesday.
Morris tribune. [volume] (Morris, Minn.) 1880-2000, 1921-08-05

Miss Margaret Ernst, saleswoman
in the Weum-Belverud Company is
taking a vacation this week.
Morris tribune. [volume] (Morris, Minn.) 1880-2000, 1921-08-05

Phone or leave your city bus calls
at LeGrand Hotel. advt.
Morris tribune. [volume] (Morris, Minn.) 1880-2000, 1921-08-05

If you have a farm that you want
to sell call and see me, or write to me.
at Morris, Mimi. Jos. J. Gaffney. adv
Morris tribune. [volume] (Morris, Minn.) 1880-2000, 1921-08-05

j. E. Danielson returned from
Green Lake where he spent several
days visiting his son F. E. Danielson.
Morris tribune. [volume] (Morris, Minn.) 1880-2000, 1921-08-05
CITY NEWS, ITEMS

Call up LaGrand Hotel for city
bus service. adVtt.
Morris tribune. [volume] (Morris, Minn.) 1880-2000, 1921-08-05

Miss Rose Ernst returned from
Danvers where she spent a week visit
ing relatives and friends.
Morris tribune. [volume] (Morris, Minn.) 1880-2000, 1921-08-05

B. E. Adams has purchased a big
sample line of jack knives which he
is closing out at less than the whole
sale price. Advt.
Morris tribune. [volume] (Morris, Minn.) 1880-2000, 1921-08-05

Stanley Ryan is i'll with rheuma-
tism this week.
Morris tribune. [volume] (Morris, Minn.) 1880-2000, 1921-08-05

F. E. Shepard of Ortonville was in
Morris Sunday and Monday of this
Morris tribune. [volume] (Morris, Minn.) 1880-2000, 1921-08-05

DR.. and Mrs. o. T. johnson and
baby daughter motored to Elbow
Lake on Sunday.
Morris tribune. [volume] (Morris, Minn.) 1880-2000, 1921-08-05

Mr.. and Mrs. ]. Olson of Herman
were in Morris on business the first
of the week
Morris tribune. [volume] (Morris, Minn.) 1880-2000, 1921-08-05

A 10 pound son was born to Mr..
and Mrs. Paul Retzlaff of Swan Lake
township ON Sunday morning, July
31st.
Morris tribune. [volume] (Morris, Minn.) 1880-2000, 1921-08-05

Mr.. and Mrs. A. w. Libby and Mr..
md Mrs. Earl sherwood have taken
/ cottage for the week at Lake Min
1owaSka
Morris tribune. [volume] (Morris, Minn.) 1880-2000, 1921-08-05

Born to Mr. and Mrs. William
Lager of Baker township a son on
Friday, July 20.
The Washington times., 1921-02-03
Let Us Hope the Ground
Hoo Is q Faker
By BILL PRICE.


Wen all hope the ground hog is faker on this notion
the civilized world has about what he does Candlemas
day.
For he his shadow yesterday, and if he's what
he's pictured we're going have six weeks OF bad weather
The winter in Washington has been the finest in many
years. bringing blessings to the poor and good to every
body The outdoor over-the gardener the fisherman the
golfer the hkerhave all been looking forward to early
spring. and it's too bad the woodchuck chucked wet
blanket over such strong hopes
The next six weeks will tell whether the ground hog
amounts to anything prophet Of will have
some bad weather The season is ripe for it. February
and early March invariably the worst part OF Wash
ngton winters The grounding theory, though, is that
the six weeks after he back in his hole will be
tionally
The tradition OF the ground hog appears to be almost
as old the history of the human It's not an
original American notion. An old British encyclopedia,
published in 1916 makes ancient tradition there and
in ancient Germany there two proverbs-the same
have to seeing his shadow and the other that
rural citizen would rather wolf enter his barn
Candlemas day than to the shine that day.
The Washington times., 1921-02-03
HUMANlsMS i
William AthertOn Du Puy-

Joseph H. DeFrees. president OF the Chamber
of Commerce Of the United States. not long ago
received q letter over which no chuckied Tor
days 1t asked whether. when he was a boy. he
was called Joey DeFrees. 1t asked whether In
1859, he presented himself at a certain prepara-
tory school in Richmond. Ind, and whether he
was q party to tho following conversation:
"Whatcher Manor
"Joey."
"Joey how much?"
"Joey Halfbushel'
Was he the boy who known Joey Half
bushel through the remainder of his stay in that
school? The man writing tho letter said that
his name had been, at that remote day, Willie
Jones. He had become a doctor. had prospered.
had retired and was living at q country place
near Buffalo.
Joseph H DeFrees wrote back that he
joey Halfbushel that he had prospered as law
yer in Chicago, and that he only missed retiring
to q farm by having been chosen last year to
head the Chamber of Commerce OF the United
States, but that he hoped to get there next year.
He did not say So but he might have told Of
coming near losing his identity in no less per-
son than Samuel Gompers, president OF the
American Federation of Labor at the time OF
his election The first photographer who snap
ped him did not do a very good job Of It. He
made the new president look like Mr.. Gompers.
which he does not to any material degree. But
this picture apeared in all the papers, and folks
have ben asking this man of wealth ever since
whether he is a twin brother to the labor leader.
When Senator New was a boy fifteen years old
he went to Europe and stayed for three years.
unattended. He wandered about the continent,
never went to school, did as he pleased.
So, when he returned to Indianapolis and his
father put him in school it was hard sleding. He
was out Of the habit Of study.
One day a friend of the family. who happened
to be owner Of an Indianapolis newspaper. stop
ped the youngster on the street and was talking
to him. The governor of the State Blue jeans
williams who had defeated no less a person than
BENJAMIN Harrison for that office, passed as
young New made remark about the governor
which impressed the editor as indicating insight
and intelligence.
That remark changed the course Of his life.
The editor offered him job as a reporter on the
spot. He worked at 1t for twenty-five years and
came to own the newspaper, entering public life
through that doorway. He holds that his life
would undoubtedly have been an entirely diff
ferent thing but for the quip delivered on a
street corner.
The Washington times., 1921-02-03
FROM THE PUBLIC
TO THE
EDITOR
ANOTHER SOLDIERS LETTER.

To the Editor Of The Times:
This in answer to the letter signed Soldier"
appearing in the issue Of your paper OF this
for eight years. 1 am an ex-member Of the First
Division having been With s, It All fh50ash tae
al present stationed here in Washington and
feel that can speak with knowledge OF my
The complaint lodged by soldier" is an old
any city where the same complaint has not been
Rsd ns s.me for ah.
seT hs ago ~as s.s t%s tss
Est largest recratins depot in the army. i was
member of the permanent party. the feeling OF
civ Civilian Clothing or dress Uniform to distinguish
mitted 10 wear the "olive drab." .,,.
.usee Sss hnk sSt9 @
with the soldier Not with the individusl 1S sn but
mta shf is dihtr il s
viii will be juds ed by the example Of q few NJ
%ent Is Very often formed from superacis
viii IF the sn
form and upon his associates than 100 OF his
ons of
1t is peculiarly true that the complaint of bad
shsn By the man Of f'e ieneer
equally that that hs Ss !; ee
soldier come to feel that he is in disrepute. and
A'fs But the Civilian i, not free from blame. His
times he is woefully ignorant of the true condi-
tions Of a soldier. To resort to his vernacular,
ne that sppeaon sOIGisa ae that the who
will consent to wear the uniform for $50
month is a useless, no account person. And he
is greatly surprised when he learns that there
soldiers here in Washington whose pay and
allowances equal to or better than the stand.
ard wage. But so long as he is ,, ignorant s.i Of
by his salary. 50 long will he have this feeling
am n compelled to say in defense OF washing
ton business people that have received nothing
but the most courteous treatment ana Judging
been stationed the soldier is exceptionally well
treated here have Seen Pisoes where the the
churches The soldier who went to church was
escorted to an obscure and rear pew and he
been patronized. am happy to say from per-
sonal observation that condition does not exist
ens ss there Te Is ts' nSt IN
Washington but what welcomes the soldier with
open arms. The Christian Endeavor societies
am a member of the First Congregational
Church and I know that everyone in that church
chaplain OF the Second Diyisionl down to the
last member will welcome the soldier.
that the better class OF people do not feel as he
thinks. And the opinion of the others doesn't
Seeps, and % the solder who is identihed WITH the
right class of people VIII never find his uniform
It is hoped by most Of the service people that
the present wartime legislation which compeis
an officer or soldier to wear his uniform at all
war we enjoyed the privilege of wearing civilian
clothing when or duty and there Is no valid
reason for the same permission not being
But granting that a man is not quite so CON
S ban a IN thst ne can De
AS SOLDIER cannot ndorse the complaint
which solder" makes Truly Truly yours, ys,o, arc
George Washington Inn.
The Washington times., 1921-02-03
Educate your cats! I've got
one that every time you kick him
he makes a BOLT for the door.
THREE w.
WINS THE PRIZE.

WINS THE PRIZE.
A. MCKNIGHT wins the prize, at
least for patience, in sending In the
record number of words derived from
the letters in the word washington"
His list compromises 255 words, four
words better than KANSAS CITY"
Mr.. Mcknight also gives the mean
ings OF words that are not in ordin-
ary use.
This illustrates the grit Of the III
and S gang. They work hours on
problems and find II beneficial to their
minds.
SMITH d. FRY, for years a
baseball fan, says that PAUL
HINES, now Of the Department of
Agriculture, twas the only great
triple-play man ever in the national
game, and moreover was the most
graceful batter who ever stepped
to the plate" Hines was hitting
400 when he made that wonderful
triple play at Providence in 1878.
The Washington times., 1921-02-03
Once-Overs
Copyright, 1871, International Feature Service, Inc
LOOK OUT FOR SHARKS.

TWIN WI II 0'S S''1~'7'
II you have a little money in the bank and
wish to invest IL in something to bring in a
greater interests do not be led into taking stock
in some OF the thousand -nnd-one wildcat schemes
for getting money out Of unsuspecttng folk.
Go to your banker and talk to him about how
you should invest your money s.
His concern earns Its income through invest
ments, and IT is his business to know what are
sound investments and those which are gambles.
The man who gets little money ahead out
OF ordinary salary does so on account OF
many sclf-denials on his own part as well as
those of his family.
He and his family have gone without good
many little luxuries that some might consider
necessities, in order to accumulate the nest egg.
After saving for years It is surprising how
Rullible n man can be.
Never In history were there so many apparent
ly feasible schemes for getting hold OF the nest
egg and attracting the savings OF the man of
small means.
Many kinds of sharks consider the small saw
ings man the best prey.
The Washington times., 1921-02-03
HOW Is Your
FL. Q. -?

WHAT is your "I. o." What
w was it ten years ago, what
p" will it be ten years from nowi
Those questions interest everybody.
The 81 O." means intelligent
quotient.
In the schools, properly run, the
81. O." of each child is carefully
noted. 81. O." merely means un-
developed possibilities. 1t all de-
pends on how that possibility is de-
veloped. Ninety-nine times out of
hundred it dwindles rapidly, it is
higher at fourteen years of age than
at twenty-four, higher at twenty
four than at thirty-four, it reaches
the vanishing point usually about
fifty. If time would turn backward
in its flight, and make us all little
boys again just for tonight, the
great majority of us would be sur
prised to find what damage the "I.
O." has suffered since the little boy
days.
The way to keep your "I. O."
fabricated and working is to interest
yourself in new ideas, even though
they be not YOUR ideas, and keep
your mind open to them.
The Washington times., 1921-02-03
DEFINITIONS OF HOME.

Tho eoiden setting. in which the
brightest Jewel is mother"
A world of strife shut out. world OF
love shut in.
Home Is the blossom Of which heaven
n the fruit.
The only spot on earth where the
faults and failinRs Of fallen humanity
are hidden under the mantle OF charity.
The place where the great are some
timea small and the small often great.
The fathers kingdom, the children's
paradise. the mothers world.
The jewel casket containing the most
precious of all jewels-domestic happi-
ness.
Tho center of our affections, around
which our hearts best wishes entwine;
WIDOW.
The Washington times., 1921-02-03
Blundering Wilson Policy
On Russia Cripples u. S.

all kinds which Russia so sorely
needs will be streaming from Eng
land and her possessions into Rus
sia.
And, since Russia has great need
and few ships, practically all of this
enormous commerce will be carried
in British vessels.
Considering the huge bulk and
the huge value Of the trade and
commerce which has thus been for
bidden to American manufacturers
and exporters and shippers and
tossed wholesale into the waiting
lap of Great Britain, we are forced
to conclude that if the London Post
was wrong in styling Mr.. Wilson
"the greatest living Englishman,"
it would have been exactly right
had it styled him the greatest living
asset of the British Empire.
The Congress is in session, and it
ought to take hold of this Russian
situation with firm hand.
It is time that Russia was shown
that there is still some intelligence
left in at least one department of
our Government.
Malice and treason themselves
could not have inflicted more injury
upon our country than has the peev-
ish and stubborn stupidity of the
Administration in it's dealings with
Russia.
The material loss, alone, caused
by this peevish and stubborn and
ignorant stupidity is greater than
the interest on our entire war debt.
Future generations will find it
hard to believe that at the very
time when England was evading the
payment of the interest due on our
loans and was actively conspiring
with our other European debtors to
cheat us out Of the principal of
those loans, the President and his
Cabinet should. deliberately hand
over to these same welching debtors
the immense and highly profitable
trade which great Russia was eager
to give to America.
The whole course of the present
Administration in dealing with for
eign affairs has been marked by one
tragic, inexcusable blunder after
another. But of all the inexcusable
blunders, the failure to pursue a
common-sense policy in dealing with
the Soviet government stands out
pre-eminent amidst the pitiable and
amazing ruck.
The Washington times., 1921-02-03
BIBLE VERSES.

Deut, 11th w.. Sd chap describes
an iron bedstead.
Eccl., 4th w.. 9Th chap, living
dog better than a dead lion.
Eccl., 1st w.. 10th chap, tells OF
dead flies" and mans folly.
I'd Kings. 11th ", I'd chap, mem
tions a chariot and horses Of fire.
Judges. 4th w., 18th chap, for a
fox chase.
Habakkuk, 11th ", I'd chap, a stone
and a beam talking together.
H. SMITH.
The Washington times., 1921-02-03
The "voice of Spring" IL q 800
hat for your wife.
HEEZA BUM.
SHORT ONES.

SHORT ONES.
what became of that gtri you made,
love to in the hammockr~
"We fell out"
"what are you carrying that shuts
ter around forT'
"Just for a blind"
"why don't you water your horsers,
'T don't have to. He's q. BAY.
II. ID. b.
The Washington times., 1921-02-03
MIR. B. Baer
NO EXPERIENCES
NECESSARY.

A Western State will es-
tablish a law to slip weekly
wages to gents who don't
work because they are lazy
and to others who don't
work for inferior reasons.
The Washington times., 1921-02-03
How q man can make q hit
Call big wom'~ my dear little
girl" CURLY.

CALLS THIS PROBLEM HARD. /.
A baseball in thrown vertically
upward to a heighth of o. feet
The suns rays make an angle
of 30 degrees with the ground.
How fast Is the shadow of the ball
moving, as the ball Just strikes
the ground7
u. VA. MATH HOUND.
''SI KOLOGY" has an idea that
MILO II. is a cake-eater. No, Milo
has writ" some sharp pieces about
the calkisA
The Washington times., 1921-02-03
PRETTY GOOD ADVICE.

There's many q good man ruined.
And many a good woman. too,
BY somebody starting q rumor.
Not q word of which In true
So when you hear some one knocking
man or a woman's good name,
You can bet it's a cheap lie;
Forget II, and never repeat II again.
MOTHEI
The Washington times., 1921-02-03
Some Speed.

The French government organization charged
with the manufacture Of cigarettes will increase
the output by installing machinery that will
turn out 100000 day.
The Washington times., 1921-02-03
HE WAS AwFULLY TWISTED.

Americas Champion Draft
Dodger has about decided that
he has jumped from the frying
pan into the skillet. He now
figures 1t Is a "toss up" as to
which is the most fortunate-to
be with Dutch in Europe. or to
be ain dutch" with America
HARPERS FERRY.
The Washington times., 1921-02-03
111EARl> 5SSEEnA

The fat girl, backed by a fat bank
account, may be most fascinating,
but the lean girl is apt to be more
healthy. Germs leave her spare
body in dismay to feed on the am
pier proportions of the more succu,
lent sister. FRED VETTER.
HE WAS AwFULLY TWISTED.
Mike dressed in a hurry to get to
work. putting on his overalls wrong
side front. An explosion occurred
where he was working and was un-
der the debris.
Pat was trying to rescue him. Are
ye Rilt, Moike?" Pat asked.
MS meself that don't kno', Pat.
I'll leave II to yez."
Pat-"Well, / don't think yer IL ded.
but begorra, ye is awfully twisted"
w. D. PAYNE.
The Washington times., 1921-02-03
Points About Peat.

Next to coal, peat Is the best fuel possible. 1t
burns longer than wood and gives more heat.
Ireland has peat equal to 1000. 900 tons of
coal There are 40, 900 900 acres OF peat bog in
Europe, and another 30,00000o in Canada.
The Washington times., 1921-02-03

The pay will be on an
eight-hour-day basis. This
compels the boys to loaf the
other sixteen hours at q
loss.
The Washington times., 1921-02-03

The town loafer is liable
to get sore, leave Moogens-
willie and 80 to 4 bigger
town, where there is more
loafing to do.
The Washington times., 1921-02-03

The real reason why a
town loafer doesn't work
Is because he is afraid that
he might lose his job. Re-
move that fear and you
have the worm in the core
OF the apple.
The Washington times., 1921-02-03

l know one guy who has the cake
eater habit so bad he has his pa
jamas made bell-bottom style.
PHILLUP. /
The Washington times., 1921-02-03

The bill makes no provi-
sion for time-and-a-half for
overtime. extra pay for
loafing on Sundays and
bonuses for wearing overalls
at masquerade partiea
The Washington times., 1921-02-03
AN EASY PROBLEM.

Maths say that "FULLA FUN'S"
problem was very easy, and gave
1912 feet as the height of the tree.
this being correct. Answers by r. II.
ATKINSON, NJ. /. T., "U. VA. MATH
HOUND" and VIM. e. CULLEN.
The Washington times., 1921-02-03

Going to make the lads
sorer than a picked turkey
when they are forced to
wake up every hour to ring
the time clock. Every work.
day will be a holiday be-
cause it's a workday. No
man who snores will be al
lowed to work with the
boys.
The Washington times., 1921-02-03

public the terms OF the preiimi-
nary treaty with the Russian
Soviet government. Briefly, these
terms are:
/. Each government agrees to, re-
frain from hostile action against the
other.
2. Each agrees not to impose any
form of blockade against the other,
or any hindrances to trade. Russian
ships in English harbors and English
ships in Russian harbors shall re-
ceive the treatment accorded to for
eign ships by commercial nations.
8. Free use of telegraphic and
postal facilities between the two
countries.
4. The Soviet government is not
to encourage actions hostile to Great
Britain in Asia Minor, Persia,
Afghanistan and India.
5. Great Britain is to refrain from
attaching any gold securities or COM
modities which the Soviet govern
ment may send outside Of Russia as
payment for goods, and is to cancel
all restrictions against the exporta-
ton of specie or bullion from Rus
sia to British territory.
Lloyd George must have to laugh
whenever he thinks of the way in
which he has made a fool of the
Wilson Administration in dealing
with Russia.
At the very time that the British
premier was in daily consultation
with the Soviet governments rep
resentatives over the terms of this
treaty of amity and commerce, all
the influence which the British gov
ernment has in Washington was
being busily employed to encourage
the stubborn and foolish Wilsonian
policy of non-intercourse with Bus
sia.
The result was that on the day
Leonid Krassin, the Soviet Repub-
lies representative in England, left
London for Moscow with a treaty
guaranteeing the resumption Of po-
litical and commercial intercourse
between Russia and England, Lud-
wig Martens, the Soviet Republics
representative in the United States,
left New York for Moscow under
an, order of deportation as an unde-
sirable alien, carrying with him the
contemptuous and insulting message
that the present Government of the
United States refused to have any
relations, political or commercial,
with the government Of Russia.
After what happened during that
day, Lloyd George and his associ-
ates in the Cabinet and a number
of London financiers must have
spent a very enjoyable evening.
The most significant feature of the
agreement with the Soviet govern
ment, which has been made public
in London, is the preamble, which
states that the present agreement
is only a necessary preliminary,
"pending the conclusion of formal
general treaty between these gov
ernments, by which their economic
and political relations shall be regu-
lated in the future"
This is the language Of negotia-
ton between governments, each of
Iz-~1.l~.
The Washington times., 1921-02-03
CURIOUS FUNERAL CUSTOMS.

Natives Of Australia tie the
hands Of the corpse and pull out
the finger nails. fearing that the
dead will scratch their way out
and become vampires.
The primitive Russians placed
a certificate OF character in the
dead persons hand. to. be handed
to st. Peter on reaching the gates
of heaven.
The Washington times., 1921-02-03

Can you pipe one OF the
boys at 4 p. m? Only two
hours to loaf and the days
work Is done. 1t will be
awful when the loafing Is
slack and the men are
forced to lay of. Give me
the happy and contented
employe who yawns at his
work.
The Washington times., 1921-02-03

The man who watches your au-
tomobile in the evening on Fifteenth
street is not paid by Keith's Thea
ter or the Washington hotel. He
depends on voluntary contributions.
T. Z. H.
The Washington times., 1921-02-03

Quiet must be maintained
in all shops. The working
man who wakes up sudden
ly is liable to wreck the ma
chinery. Alarm clocks must
be muffled within the city
limits. Production must be
speeded up.
The Washington times., 1921-02-03

Only steady loafers will be
benefited by the new law.
The bum who watches the
clock will be ostracized by
the boys who put their
whole hearts in their work.
The Washington times., 1921-02-03

When discontented en-
ployes refuse to sleep on
the job, strikebreakers will
be imported. Daylight in
somnia Is a big item in over
head expense.
The Washington times., 1921-02-03
YEA, BO!

Life always has some horrid clog.
To trip q fellow up.
It's hard to be a gay gay dog,
On the income OF q pup.
NJ. /. RITE.
The Washington times., 1921-02-03

Man used to take his musket
and powder horn and go hunting
for DEER. Now the little
DEAR takes a powder pun and
goes hunting for a man.
w. WALTER
The Washington times., 1921-02-03

The nurse said, "It's a boy"
And he was overwhelmed with JOY.
For having now become pop,
His income tax will drop.
The Washington times., 1921-02-03
EAMON o'sUILLEABHAIN.

A guest at the st. Marks cafe
asked waiter if he knew Fritzie
Scheff and he answered, mo, but
l am we'll acquainted with the sauce
cook"