The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1921-10-06

The Times last evening. The repo7
(Which came too late for the green
Pity the poor umpire. whose I'M
tutored mind never seems to please
everybody. and he works 30 hard.
Do you remember how Themis-
toclss was driven out and forced to
live In Persia by the ungrateful
country that he savedf That would
be like sending Runyon to live in
Yonkers. The umpire knows the
bitterness that drove the old Greek
to his end. There could be no base
ball without him. yet he has all the
hate, none Of the game. Please, II
you ever see q baseball game. cheer
the umpire. No. that would not be
heard In the Kissing. But anyhow,
shake hands with him afterwards,
like Roosevelt unbending to the loco
motive engineer.
Babe Ruth comes to bat. begin.
ming Of sixth inning. score to o
for the Yankees-you have lost your
bet with the writer 30 far. One man
on second base, here Is Ruth's
chance to bring that man home, and
great heavens! Babe Ruth has
struck out. Fourteen minutes past
three, October s, 1921. Write It on
your tablets and recite to yourself:
Somewhere In this pleasant land.
The sun In shining bright" etc.
Hero Comes Meusel.
However. here comes Bob Meusel.
Yankees Bob. He hit two-bagger,
brings In that man. But bark! he
did not put his foot on first base a.
he went by, and he IL out. How
ever, that run counted, and the
score In Q to o for the. Yankees.
How easily man could become q
gambler, after picking the winner.
When you know nothing you irnme-
diately think that you know some
thing. Then you are lost.
There are to be four more innings
Of this, perhaps extra ones; and
pledged to write the game "scienti.
fically by innings." as this writer Ii.
II ID q long pull. Owners Of news.
papers, from Hearst to the editor OF
the Skibbereen Eagle. are informed
that they ought to raise the pay OF
their baseball reporters. It Is hard
work, ungrateful work and requires
the magination Of a Dante and the
perseverance Of q Trollope. Such q
combination In worthy good pay.
Like II or not. attribute the state
ment to age that makes the feet tot
ter and the mind slow down, hut
baseball Is dull.
Sixth inning ended. a boy from
Fordham, ancestors from Germany.
frankie Frisch. has won the little
glory those Giants have, but no rune
for the Giants and three for the Yam
KEGS. The Yankees come to bat. be-
ginning Of seventh. Thousands in
the seats all stand up together.
Strange mystery in that unanimity.
No. Runyon says. Those are the
Yankee fans. and it's the beginning
Of the seventh. They all stretch:
didn't you ever know that7"
~. They All Stretch.
The writer had heard It: in fact, ad-
vised an advertising man to make
use Of IL in Q garter advertisement.
They all stretch" but important
things leave the mind. When ths
Giants come to bat in the seventh.
the Giant fans will all stretch.
Fan" by the way. Is an abbrevia.
ton Of fanatic" That explains
baseball.
Two Yankees out. II you care 70
know. one on first base, Mays Is bat
ting. does II well. But his hit forced
q man to run from first to second: no
two men on one base, which SCENE
very unjust. While running. tho
man from first was hit by the batted
hall. and out: end of the seventh for
the Yankees.
The tiresome flying machine II
hack again. There II O kite above,
advertising "Beefsteak Charlie" FIJI.
tieth street west Of Broadway. This
Is the place for Beefsteak Charlie to
advertise.
To know how much beefsteak those
eighteen players could eat would In.
terest Lucuilus, still more Whaling,
tho emperor from whose name we
get our word WHALES" Some peo-
pie will remember that. after they
forget today's score. Just listen to
this: Perfectly seriously, Runy> n
says. But here comes Ruth, and II
will be his last chance for q homo
run In this game, unless the score Is
tied in the ninth inning. and It won't
be-"
Ordinary reporters are afraid to
prophesy like that. in the middle Of
a game.
Az Runyon Was Saying.
To go back to Runyon. He was
saying, perfectly seriously. mo