davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1920-09-09
SEMEN0FF'S MEN FOLLOW
CAPTURED GOLD RESERVE
when the General Lost 1t, His Sol
d!ers Went Over to the Rus
sim Far Eastern Republic

I.UNIIUN. Sept. 8.-Gcncral Scmen-
OF adventures in tho Far East have
ended and his troops. under the
leadership of General Lokhvitski
have gone over to the government
of the Russian Far Eastern rcpub-
lie according to u wireless dispatch
from Moscow.
Scmcnon's entire gold reserve Is
said to have been captured and
handed over TO the Vladivostok gov
eminent.
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1920-09-09
Funny Nicn.

W aANe been asked: WHO in YOUR opin-
on We're and are the worlds creates, humor-
!s;s?"
Well begin with Plu,srch Aristotle
N!"Ee7eS' we come down TO Horace Ep!c,etus
Marcus Au-el.us and still farther touch light
j. on that unnamed host OF Men who Took
themselves seriously. For after all. the true
mission OF The philosopher and savant. the
voc; and Prophet, the Alchems; and Rcformer
: - make Us laugh.
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1920-09-09
Nuts.

We know. gentleman In an institution who
stands Win his right arm crooked out like a
handle, and thinks he IS a Pot OF Tea He
'eGGires 70 lie grabbed ny the arm now and
tHen AID poured. or he goes dangerous: so
they have keeper trailing around doing moth
In s hut pouring h!:.i.
And get. thinking Of some other men we
AAo~. NOT in institutions. that doesn't seem
s. extreme,
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1920-09-09
woman. Luffiy woman.

She Is now the official equal of Man. and yet:
i She hangs onto the peek-a .bco.
? She SILVER. Tor mouse.
3. She uses lipst!ck.
!. She cheats The conductor
;. She paints her hair with henna tea
6. she dies into petty RACES
A"d she t;srs when he calls her pet
names.
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1920-09-09
Picked In MT R,ndom

y Fool wrote Book. and another Fool
read il;
The wise uAn plays Folly to win.
The noise Of loud Amen Is nothing TO the
Cater OF . dollar ,on the plate
NAeaTAe" increment Is all that keeps some
men from being uletul
M2;r.1eay is a partnership and Man is the
S.i.a; Partner
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1920-09-09

The senatorial olGarchy releuted on its
order combining Senator Harding to his
front porch and permitted him TO make a
trip into Minnesota. Ii put him aboard u
special train, however and gave the train
crew strict instructions TO bring him back
on schedule time
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1920-09-09

The Maine State election will be held
on September Is and both parties are keen
~ interested in the outcome, Is they
imagine the result will give some iudi-
cation of how the voters are lining up for
the national contest
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1920-09-09

For the first time since he was named
to head his party's ticket, Senator Hard
ing, in his Minnesota State Fair speech
failed to wobble on The league OF nations
That was because he failed TO mention it.
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1920-09-09
Charcoal Eph. Dali, Tbourh,

"iiit sure do beat ALL" said Charcoal Eph,
'u'ninatve!E. how some men draw all night Z
ihrces an got L lay down t a fellah fillin' a
three bob hunch. Eat hunk O. melon
MIsJAh Jackson
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1920-09-09
AIISIATi'I,E ALMANAC
ELECT THIRTY DELEGATES
TO CONVENTION OF u. D. C..
Hi"hm"nd Chapter to lie Represented
la Force mt Petersburg Mt
Annual Gathering.

AT the meeting OF Richmond
chapter United Daughters or Con-
iedcracy held yesterday morning.
ucleGatcs 10 the convention Of the
Virginia division, which meets in
i'etersburE September 90. we're
elected. The president Of tho divl-
sion Mrs. Cabeil. will preside over
the convention.
The Richmond delegation Will lie
-. guests or the National Society.
United states Daughters OF 1912, at
tea In st. Joscnh's HALL Tuesday
nlEhr; SEPTEMBER IS from to :
o'clock. Mrs. Irwin Wnln Neon and
MISS Mary Anna Ncbl.tt ar. chair
men for this event.
Those delegates to tho convention
CHOSEN yesterday were as follows:
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1920-09-09
Hay Fe,Vr.

Tat'e arc wrinkles in my eyebrows
And a soreness In my throat:
srsn snseze TIE Star-Spangled Banner"
Wt:hou. missing . note.
Contributed by y. o F.. Richmond
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1920-09-09

The Washington government is conduct
ing all investigation TO ascertain the prog
ress being made by the nations of the world
in the movement for universal disagma-
meni AS yet, it has struck 10 pay dirt a."
The recruiting agent seems to be active
everywhere. and in some countries is work
ing overtime
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1920-09-09
DUBLIN PHYSICIAN QUITS
Lcnve* Irish Privy Council I'm protc.,
Against British Governments
INV Assoclated prnss

BEiFAST. Sept; S.-Dr. Michael
Francis Scott. the noted Dublin
physician. has resigned from Tho
Irish privy council as protesI
against the governments policy in
Ireland.
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1920-09-09

1t is probable that the big packing houses
are entirely sinosre in their announced
anxiety TO sell all their by-product enter
prises. They may calculate with reason
able certainty that in few years they Will
buy back the properties al their own price
after the purchasers have met the disasters
inevitable for inexperience, fancy theories
limited capital and lack OF contro! OF
SOURCES OF supply.
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1920-09-09

Nainiall IL hours ending l.. NJ. Sone
Ealninil - hours ending l.. NJ. None
excess Since March l.........,....,. III
ENcess since January l.......... SD
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1920-09-09
Voice of the People

Letters must give the name and address of
the writer. Name Will not be published 10
writer . requests.
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1920-09-09

i3rnl Observations ut q =. VI. Yesterday.
y M,nu direction. south: wind velocity. z.
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1920-09-09
Local Trmperntur. Yestcr,,.v

l.. NJ. temperuture... ...~'' -.
Maximum temperature to y y. NJ ~
minimum temperature To s l., If b5
Mean temperature yesterday ia
Normal tcinDera;urc Tor this date III
n.u,inny Svstcruny
bciisisney since "ss January ntsn ii .... g,
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1920-09-09
The Weather
tFurnt. &c by U. 8. Weather Burenu,
Forecast. vIrsInIa-

Forecast: ylrEinIa-
Cloudy Thursday. prob
nbis followed by show
ers; Friday showers.
Moderate temperature.
North Caroilna-IOcui
showers Thursday and
l'rlduy.
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1920-09-09

'THURsbAY. sErTEMBEK ., ie2O-'-
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1920-09-09

LIN his efforts to capture the Yves; Seaa.
Tor Harding is promising 70 reclaim all
the Western wet lands and CONVEX, them
INTO flourishing farms Realizing nc iu-
tility of trying TO break tho Solid south.
he has failed 10 mention The 50 O0O. 600
vet acres below the Mason and Dixon line
which properly drained could feed the ma
ton lie would, it seems, lea the Demo
cratic South perLsh In us sWamn.
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1920-09-09

N" foregoing scents 10 be nm
49, cm,nHo on IN" rlnnk in the New York
p.HySratIc state platform daCl,..I,,1
IIDr iEht wines and beer. Tbynn'
out,hs "f the Sew York dcic.n;io.,
tion Ia" l,Inoeraiic national conv,ps
'"c nomination Of McAdooJ
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1920-08-12
LATEST STYLE IN HAIR CUTS
New York Tonsorial Artist Advertises
to Trim the Bean "Physiog-
nomically."

Hair cut physiognomically" Is the
Impressive sign on the window Of a
"tonsorial artist" in the downtown Sec
ton of New York.
whats the sign mean?" asked q
customer who drifted into the shop rs
barber started to wait on him.
II don't know" was the reply. "Some
new-fangled idea Of the boss"
When appealed to the proprietor of
the place swelled with pride and in
his weightiest tones explained his
brain child in this manner:
"That means that when you get into
the chair we study your face and then
proceed to cut your hair in such a
manner that the trimming will con-
form to your general physiognomy,
meaning your face. Sometimes man
Is victim of his barber in regard to
his appearance-you know there are
some men in the barber business here
who ought to be shoemakers and can
not see any further than the hand
that holds the expected tip. We bury
defects in the face by the manner Of
hair cutting and enhance the good
points. Women don't overlook this in
putting up their hair and there is NO
reason why men should"
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1920-08-12
Eagle as an Emblem.

They are two different species of
eagle. The American eagle is the
white-hcaded or bald eagle, while the
German is known as the imperial
eagle, probably identically original
with the golden eagle of Europe. Our
American eagle first appeared as an
emblem ON the great seal of the United
States, adopted June 20, 1882; it's de-
sign was shield on the breast of an
American bald eagle. The device is
stated to have been largely suggested
to John Adams when minister to Great
Britain by Sir John Prestwich, Eng
fish antiquary. The eagle was first
used on United States coins in 1888.
The Pcrsans, Etruscans, Romans,
French under Napoleon, Austrians,
Russians and PrnSsans have all used
on their standards the imperial eagle,
emblem of power; the double-headed
eagle of Austria and of Russia signi-
fed power east and west. The Ger
man eagle is the single-headed black
eagle. With red claws and tongue and
the crown of Charlemagne over the
head.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1920-08-12
WOULD MAKE EASIER READING
Boston Man Has Idea for Printing
Books That ls Interesting but
Revolutionary.

Why not print all books in such {
way that every page is a right-hand
page? asks ID. l. Winslow of Boston
who claims patent for his conception
Of how to do 1t. He holds that if one
has To mad pages on one side of a book
only. his will be held more easily the
eyes will not wander, there Will be &c
necessity for changing the position OF
head and neck when passing from one
page to another. Thus reading espe-
ciall big, heavy volumes, will be
less uing not only to the eyes
he and neck, but also to rims
and hands.
Mr.. Wins, w's idea is to print II book
SO that you I'D straight ahead from
right-hsul page to right-hand page
these being numbered consecutively !;
then, when you have read through to
the last right-hand page, you turn the
book upside down and continue reading
as before, what in ordinary books are
left-hand pages now being rght-hand
pages. This, of course, involves print
Ing all left-hand pages upside dow
and numbering them consecutively
from the back of the book This would
easily be arranged by the printer in
laying out the forms, though to get the
paginatiOn of large book correct
would require some nice calculation or
the printers part.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1920-08-12
CHIMES RING AGAIN
Bells of ST. Clements, in Old London,
Appeal to Children, as in
the Olden Days.

"OrnngcS and Lemons rang out on
the old bells of st. Clements on the
last day of March on an evening as
fine as any during the finest w:ntcf
London hns ever known. The bells
rang. but few heard them, prevented
by the roar of the Strand traffic 1t
was the first time the old nursery
rhyme had been rung out from the
steeple for very long while Some
hundreds of school children, who han
been invited to attend the church, file /
out at the close in small professions,
rloted across the streams of traffic hy
the London policemen. Every child
carried an orange or lemon, n gift
which made up to them for the faint
tones in which the voices of the old
bells reached their ears. Down the
streets with the historic names running
from the Strand to the Thames. St.
Clements music was more audible the
sound carrying over the noise and roar.
and into the Offices where anybody,
with a turn of mind for antiquity, has
hut to throw open his window to hear
the sound of n bell cast in the year of
the Spanish armada.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1920-08-12
Hawai-, Claims wettest Spot.

Hawaii now claims the wettest sro't
on earth. From records COVERING .
long period, Cherrapunii. village al
ali Elevation of about $500 feet in the
KhaSi hills In India, has established
rainfall average Of 1876 inches year.
with a maximum of sos inches in the
questionable record for 1861. Short
period observations show that Mount
Waialeale, the central peak of the
island Of Kauai, with a height of $3.50
feet, has yearly average of 47G
inches; while estimates for nearby 10
cal1ties for the wet years of 1914 and
1910, when no records We're kept. make
1t appear that the rainfall then must
have exceeded 600 inches Other parts
Of Hawaii are scarcely less damp Pun
Kukui, 5000 feet high, on the island OF
Maui. has had seven-year average OF
800 inches, with a maximum of 56g
inches in 1914. At least a dozen other
spots, above 1000 feet of elevation. are
reported to have exceeded $50 inches
In each of the years 1914 and 1918.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1920-08-12
HORSESHOE PITCHERS
DECIDE CHAMPIONSHIP

Iowans are manifesting more inter.
est in the horseshoe pitching contest,
which will be held as q part of the
state fair, than they are in the devel-
opment Of the crop situation, according
to word from the fair board.
Practically every county in in the
state is entering team in the contest
which will determine the champion
ship pitchers of the state. The COM
petition will be in progress every day
of the fair. It will open with a pre-
liminary tournament in which each
team will pitch for points. Each
pitcher is to throw % shoes from each
end in competition with some other
team to be selected by lot.
Following these preliminaries, the
eight teams which stand highest, will
be entered in a final tournament for
the championship of the state. Each
team will pitch one game of 81 points
with each other team,
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1920-08-12
Iron Germs.

in the same manner that coral is de
rived from certain minute sea-insects
who flourish in the South Pacific, so
certain iron ores are obtained from
particular microscopic organisms.
That is the latest scientific discovery.
which promises interesting develop
mentS.
1t has been proved that these germs
not only aid in the decomposition of
rocks and in the formation of chalk
and limestone, but play an active part
In the forming of iron-ore deposits.
Laboratory cultures have been made
Of bacteria which deposit iron com
pounds both in surface waters and in
mine water hundreds of feet under
ground, and the hard crusts and Shiny
masses that choke up water supply
pipes have been found to be composed
of millions of these "iron bacteria"
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1920-08-12
FIREWORKS A FEATURE
OF BIG NIGHT SHOW

A spectacular display depicting 'sThe
Siege of the Dardanelles," the most
famous naval battle Of the late war,
will be the chief attraction at the
night shows of this years state fair.
The program for the fair, which has
just been received here, announces
practically all of the old night show
features which have drawn such
large crowds in the past. 1t has been,
announced that the horse shows to be
held each evening in the stock pavilion,
will be considerably enlarged this year
They will include showings of fancy
horses of all types, saddle, harness,
jumpers, hunters, military and half
dozen other kinds. Secretary A. r.
Corey has stated that entries are to
come from some of the finest stables
in America for this show.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1920-08-12
Queen PIeasures Carnival.

All the Protestant churches acllnowi-
edge the continual dlminution of their
congregations and are earnestly en-
deavoring to discover why the great
majority abstain from public worship,
says a Sydney, N. S. W., dispatch to
the London Times. Several novel
schemes have been propounded to
make services more attractive but the
clergy finch from any startling limo
vations. Recently Rev. G. Black at a
meeting of the Baptist union declared
that "Queen Pleasure holds high carni-
VAL" and continued: "The churches are
unheeded by the mass of pleasure
trippers, who patter by with feet
tingling with the torch of the tango,
ears atingle with the Jingle of the jazz,
and hearts atlame with riotous pas
sion"
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1920-08-12
GASOLINE TURNS THE EARTH
Motorboats Are Replacing Gondolas In
Venice, and Even the WindmlIis
In Holland Disappear.

Wotorboats in Venice, replacing the
gondolas are not the only mechanical
proclamation that Is coming In to disap-
point future American travellers in Eu-
rope. A letter from Amsterdam tells
us that the Dutch windmills are being
replaced by mills operated by steam
and electric power. Every year some
of the old windmils are burned. and
they are not regretted Time may
come when a few windmills will be
treasured as relics in Holland; Just as
similar structures are still preserved
on Aquidneck and Nantucket islands
for their curious interest, says the
Boston Transcript. Already winGmills
of American construction, with steel
fans arranged in wheels. instead of
the picturesque old wooden arms ha9
begun to make their appearance, even
in Holland The metallic windmill
with the revolving wheel. is more pic.
turesque than the ordinary steam or
water power min, but it is not so pic
tureSque as the old wooden affairs.
On our western prairies and plains the
tall windml!s, with their big metal
wheels spinning high in the air. are
indeed a fine feature In the monot
onous landscape, but even they are in
danger of yielding to, the process of
pumping water by means of gasoline
motors. The power of the wind, to
be sure, costs nothing. while That OF
the gasoline motor may cost a good
deal, but there are times when no
wind blows, and the householder tires
of waiting for it to rise. Less and
less we are content to attend upoE
forces of nature. The beautiful sails
are vanishing from the seas. to be re-
placed by bclching smokeStacks. On
land windmills give place to structures
operated by steam and electricity. The
stalwari oxen are no longer seen at
the farmers pillow; it is gasoline that
turns the earth now. Homeward the
unweary motor banks its way!
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1920-08-12
DIDN'T TELL ALL THE STORY
Man Really Had Performed Remark.
abie Feat, but He Had Great
Reason for Hurry.

One of the very substantial men Of
thriving town in the West is named
Garry Mcintyre. One day. in conversa-
ton with a number of soldiers from a
military post near by, he said:
~ understand you lads are going
on a hike. When you reach Snake
river, take a good look at it, It's full
of undercurrents and eddies. Boys,
am the only living man who ever swan
that river
Several days later the men crossed
the Snake river on cable ferry. The
iewylnan Glanced to inquire. quite cas-
ually, of a waiting soldier:
DO you know man down in your
country by the name of Garry Nc
lntyre? They tell me he has accumu.
lated a lot of money"
II was talking to him only the OF er
day. said the soldier. Gle told me
he swan Snake river once"
That's right, he did" said the ferry
man. He sure did; but we were all
shooting at him."-Philadelphi Ledg.
err.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1920-08-12
Love as camovfIaqe Artist.

To fall in love means the surrender
ing of ones normal capacity for judg-
i"ent, says a modern novelist. 1t is
impossible both TO love and criticize.
Love turns every goose into a swan.
love is the greatest of all camou-
mage artists. 1t makes ugliness APP
pear beauty, cruelty seem like kind.
ness inanity has a sort of genius.
When You fall in love with an ass
on cad or an empty-headed young
Woman with very moderate looks Gas
YOU frequently do) and your friends
point out the truth to you (as they
certainly wilD, you either lose your
temper or Your friends, or spend 5hur
whole life in inventing mitigating cir
cumstanccs. I'm either case you are
inevitably and quite properly regarded
as a fool. Do not imagine that yon
can love with discretion, win the
thrills. at the same time retaining the
reputation of well-balanced sanity.
That is MISUNDERSTANDING.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1920-08-12
Nothing Green in Death Valley.

The natural vegetation of Death val
ley is scant and stunted. There is not
a green thing that grows there natural
ly. The thorny mesquit trees are of q
acknowledgement tinge; so, too, are the
grease bushes, while the sagebrush is
either yellowish gray or the color of
ashes. A little round gmlrd called the
desert apple grows in some of the can
yons. 1t turns yellow when ripe and
has a thin meat within that is exceed
ingly bitter. The cactus that grows
beyond the valley in abundance is
rare here In short. the vegetation of
Death valley is terribly scant. even in
comparison with the Mojave desert.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1920-08-12
WEAR BELLS ON THEIR TOES
Men Of pakar, French West Africa,
Also Carry Surprising Assortment
Of Other Trinkets.

Men of Dakar, the seat of French
West African administration, literally
wear rings on their fingers and bells
on their toes, not to mention amulets,
beads, coins and surprising ussort-
ment Of trinkets, mostly regarded as
charms. The natives, however, are
not to be regarded as savage, except in
their ability to fight.
OF the West African tribes. the Ber-
heFs are believed by some experts to
have been at one time masters Of the
Mediterranean. They have many times
their homesteads but always .nain-
tain their racial identity, their physi.
cal characteristics and persistent
love of freedom.
The Belber women have fought by
their husbands sides, and their moral
ity is of q high character. In Dnkar
can also be seen the Serers, q tribe
OF natives that worship the snuke and
believe in the tranSmis-ation of souls.
height of six feet and six inrtes
is not uncommon among the men Of
the Serers.
Among the most intelligent Of the
natives are the Fulahs, whose folk
tales be'fay lofty ideals aid poetic
Imaginary that is comparable with
early Greck and Morse lore. Their
Workmanship is famous, and their
cavalry is noted for daring and valor.
The intelligence of their wohlsn and
the respect accorded Them is attestel
by the proverb: LET female slave
enter household and she soon be-
comes mistress"
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1920-08-12
Foolish Question.

An official who was making up an
assessment roll because of some re-
cent street improvement called at each
house on the improved streets to learn
the names Of the property owners. At
one house he climbed out of his car.
went to the door and knocked.
"Who owns this property?' he asked.
"Why, I d." the woman answered.
The official got her name and put II
down in his book. Then he took y
squirt at the size Of the lot.
"How many feet?" he asked. 1.-TWO,
Of course" the woman snapped, won
dering whether he thought she was
centipede.