The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1920-01-08
TALES OF TOWN

year popping early.
II the wood alcohol fools multiply
the country will have to give still
more attention to reforestation.
This is the age when money comes
easy, goes easier and we're gol dern-
ed uneasy when we haven't got it.
A man goes to the school Of life for
fifty or sixty years, but about all he
learns il that he doesn't know much.
II the "stews" insist upon drinking
all the wood alcohol, automobilists will
have to invent something else to keep
the radiators from freezing.
An Emmett man received as =
Christmas present q handkerchief
which was accompanied by this note:
BLOW yourself 1t my expense
It Is quite evident that the fools
who trifle with the illicit kick will
have to be careful about the voltage
Of It.
In some cities, it Is customary to
clean off the sidewalks when it SHOWS
In Emmett the system is to tramp 1t
down and let nature take it's course.
BY the time woman has finished
waiting on her husband and children
they are all hungry again and it is
time to cook another meal
The recent meeting of the Republic
can national committee opened with
prayer, led by Chairman Hays in per-
SON. Which is certainly one on the
Democrats.
An exchange contained this news
item: mrs. Porta, who liz sueing her
policeman, for divorce, tes-
lifted that he beat her until there were
welts on her afterward--."
. .
Attorney General Palmer promises
an early reduction in food prices. We
ndorse that program, and though we
10 not wish to appear impatient we
would be glad to hear of sweeping re-
auctions in pants.
A Minnesota gent has invented
with which eggs may be
ropped 800 feet, without getting the
melete effect Eggs will have to
all about that distance to get within
each Of the poor mans breakfast
able. There may be some trouble in
Inducing an egg to ride in the inven-
or's parachute, as the egg has been
iding in the balloon until it has
rown TO enjoy the higher attitudes.
A well known furniture dealer Of a
irginia town wanted to give his
aithful negro driver something for ,
hristmas in recognition Of his un- I
ailing good humor in toting out I
loves, beds, pianos, etc. "Dobson," !
e said. you have helped me through I
,me pretty tight places in the last I
IN years, and want to give you :
as Christmas present r
rat will DO useful to you and that /
ou will enjoy. Which do you pre- =
IA ton of coal or gallon of good i
hiskey?" Boss" Dobson replied,
All burns wood"
On the Bassans docks at Bordeaux,
rance, an old-time sergeant of a t
sgro regiment was having trouble t
it'll detail of men of his own race, c
no seemed inclined to loaf on their L
ork Of loading box cars with provi- {
ons for the army Of occupation. Ad-
'essing the negro. who was especially
zy, he exclaimed: Come on, you.
it to work. darl. "Shucks, sergeant =
piled the lazy one. "Ah listed for !;
wan, an nltS over. 10 Ait u I
arm fool the sergeant yelled. ''Yo' o
sted fob dc wah. Y-a-s-sl An also :
h do duration Of de wah. Now. mig
err, de wah hits over, but de durs-
on, hits jes' done begun
The steel and coal strikes were on;
lie reds were busy in thousands of
communities stirring up an
-chy; the civilized world was liter
ly broiling with discomfort; the
were piling up their guilty
illions unrestrained. And Fred War
m. former editor of the Appeal to
sason at Girard, Kas., socialist
cturer Of national renown, was
arting out from home with his ira
ling bag in hand, to fill q speaking
where are you going
WI" inquired Mrs. Warren. "Out
save the world" he replied. allow