Arizona republican., 1920-11-14
LOW COST OF LIVING


 Government investigators announce that portions are going up and prices going down in restaurants and lunch rocns.
 The fifty-two slices to a deck sys- tern1sof bread cutting is to be cut in half. with the joker and the crust no longer wild in the two card draw. Butter will be served. in portions permitting at least two trips with the knife. Extra portions may be ob- taincd without permission of the war nnae. conservation board
 The 'con" Is to be taken out of con- somDne and the chicken that has been In accordance with the rigid one-Way traffic regulations will now be per uifted to make a round trip Mock turtle soup will be less mock md more turtle. The lond standing split between the peas fn split pea soup has been ad- Dusted and one whole pea win be guar Ruterd with every portion.
 me commission for the conserva- tiot of waterways has taken hold of the tomato soup situation and ruled tha4 the tomato must be mightier than the reservoir from now on-
 And. oh. mani the fish entree. thanks to a policy of protecting the rights of uman rRtionA win be given more rec ignition It has been impossible to recognize it in the past.
 Washington has announced that the fish portion must be larger than the alice of lemon and that the practice sf exasperating the patron by hiding EaId fish under a spray of parsley or holly. or whatever 1t is. must be aban- toned
 In au meat orders the emphasis is Do be put on the last three letters of fT4ma nN4A nf w one bone for about eight bones and a half is to be abolished.
 Chopped steak and hash will be ab- lutely forced to declare themselves, their politics and their component parts
 There is to be more duck and less roast in roast duck and breaded breast of guinea hen will have more breast and Jess breeding.
 EQuabs are to be cheaper and there is Co be no charge for the frilled white paper rolled on the drumsticks.
 Lamb and mutton will be much cheaper. due to the recent dumping onto the market of the presidents flock of White house sheep.
 Beef is to fall. This will mean more beefing by the chef and less by the customer.
 The practice of serving potatoes pompom. in the form of little white balls. has been ordered stopped. Nu- merous camphor balls have lately found their way Into such orders by mistake.
 From now on there will be more gravy for the customer and less foI lhe pfoprietor.
 At last a patron will be guaranteed his just desserts. All portions of des- sert will be visible to the naked eye This win result in a saving to the res taurant amounting to hundreds as wei as tho patron. Every restaurant hal lost hundreds of dollars worth of dish - cs a week due to the attempts of thu diners to scrape the. pears off tho plates. How were they to know tn fruit was painted on?
 And. shades of old New England The Soxony system of price fixing a applied to pies is t0 be cast aside Ney biucprints have been drawn up to gov crn tho early winter pie cuts; and consumer will be able to get a sig Go it him. In the past the standar pie cut has been infants size only Adult sizes and models are now prom feed.
 The water portion in finger bowl will be much larger. but customers from the sticks arc respectfully urge not Co add sugar and cream before be ing rebuked by the educated eaters out at the next table.
 The fines for stealing spoons, fork and napkins will not be changed in tn feast