The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1920-09-02
COT BILLS COAT
He Simply Couldn't Understand
About Wife's Hands.
Doing Only a Small Part Of House.
work Allotted TO His Helpmate
His "Fins" Were a Sight,
but Hers, Never.
Bill is wearing gloves !


Any time you see Bill wearing gloves
know ye that something has occurred.
II may be death and Bill may be
going TO attend the funeral or II may
be that Bill Is bound for o wedding,
or else there Is always the chance that
the Improved order OF Joints Is going
10 have some sort Of n ceremonial and
that Bill is going to be participant
1t was knowledge OF this peculiar
ity which caused all to look Mt Bill
In an lnquiring sort of way when he
came In t'other night and which
prompted Joe to ask: ",Ehats the big
Idea, Bill, that you've got your fins
covered7"
"Wlfe sick"
II was far from satisfactory ex-
PLANTATION. Joe voiced the sentiment
when he remarked, petulant like.
that's HI of reasonv
"Huhw
u was plain Bill wasn't going to he
voluble on this subject of "them"
gloves. Now II there Is one thing In
this world that Joe delights in more
than another II is In pecklng away
Mt Bill, and Bill equally enjoys seek
Ing to harass that persons nanny.
81 said that wasn't much of rea-
son." repeated Joe. "My wife's been
sick and | didn't wear gloves; don't
see no reason on earth why you should
be wearing gloves Just because the
Mlssus is ILL., unless you're expecting
her 10 pass over and are making pre-
iimlnary arrangements for the serv-
| ices"
That nettled Bill. "Smart, aren't
| you" he asserted. "It's the great
wonder OF my life that some OF the
funny papers like the Undertakers'
Herald haven't engaged you to con-
duct their humorous column. You're
about as funny, as, as-as a stick
of wood. Now you're so darned in
| quisitive, Just look at them"
Bill peeled of the gloves and dis
played his hands.
Say, but you ought to have seen
'em. Red A fresh boiled lobster
was dark blue compared to those
hands
There's the answer" says Bill.
"The wlfe's been sick and I've been
doing the housework. didn't mind
II much at first, sort of fun, you know.
Made me think I was some cheese
around the house. Didn't do II Just
because l wanted to. but because !
Ind to. Couldn't get any help and the
wife had to be cared for. had to have
n bite to eat and the house had to be
looked after. I did 1t; yes. | did. ]
cooked and swept and / washed
dishes and, believe me. did some
chore, but gosh almighty. don't un-
derstand II yet, why my hands got so
blasted red.
Just look nj EN-" Again BIZ dis.
played those hands. Look at em
aren't they beauties Honest, the only
thing | can think of every time look
at those hands is Joe's nose before
the first of last July.
"Those hands. say, began 10 get
red. They got redder and redder un-
I'll they're what you see displayed be
fore you. win they stop there? |
dunno. But this here Is what gets
me: When the wife is on her feet
doing the work, she does 100 times
as much as I've been doing; she not
only washes the dishes. but she scrubs
the floors and washes the clothes and
cleans the house and gosh only knows
what and, by hockey. I've yet to see
her hands when they look even slight
ly red. What's the answer Tell me?'
Sam, In Lewiston Journal.