davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington times., 1920-07-17

advice--but none Of the relations
believe in experts, and they have
made fun OF the little mother and
laughed at her and nagged her
about it until she doesn't know
whether she's on her head or her
feet, and doesn't care so very much
What shall she do about 1t? Well.
now; I'll tell you. little mother.
Spring is here. and the dandeIions
will soon be all over the place, like
so many gold medals. for honorable
conduct on the field of battle. and
the meadow larks will be sitting on
the telegraph wires. calling at the
top OF their voices, Gee. what
peach of a day!" And the bobolinks
will swing and play chute-the-
chutes on the swaying tips OF wild
bushes along the roadside, and the
violets will be blue at the foot OF
the old oak tree. Why don't Sou
and husband and the baby hurry up
The Washington times., 1920-07-17
BRITISH TO RESTORE
GAY UNIFORM
BY Robert j. Prev,
Universal stan Correspondent.

r ONDON, June 16.--The gay days
Of the red-coats are return
ing. whitehall, the Strand,
and the parks are again to be
splashed with the red, blue. green
and tartan of the British army pre-
war uniform.
Today khaki Is still the military
hue seen on the streets of London.
the only color notes being found In
the brilliant uniforms of the Life
Guardsmen keeping mounted guard
at the portals Of the war office and
In the old-time skirted costume OF
the Beefeaters at the Tower OF
: London.
Small wonder that Winston
Churchill, the war minister. finds II
difficult to fll the much-thinned
ranks of the British regular army.
or to arouse any popular enthusiasm
for the revived territorial army. 1t
was always tho winning attraction
OF the vivid army uniforms that
enabled color sergeants to hand the
Kings shilling (the symbolical ac-
ceptance Of service with the colors)
to steady streams OF recruits.
Khaki "won the war" and Will be
retained as the working dress OF the
British army. but rainbow uniforms
have again TO be restored 10
win men to the ranks. There will
be greater simplicity than in pre-
war days. but the traditional regi-
mental distinctions are to reappear;
historic flashes and badges. varic-
gated kits and stockings plumes
and feathers, each a badge OF honor
won for the regiment in battle
great or small. A beg Is to
be made at once with the Household
Troops. The Brigade OF Guards are
reintroducing their pre-war red
coats for full-dress parades and
walking out. and corps and regi-
monts OF the line will quickly fol-
low. RlHemen return to Lincoln
. green with black equipment; the
Royal Horse Artillery get back to
their sober uniform OF blue. with
broad red stripes, and the sapper to
his rcd tunic with blue facings,
which is the descendant OF the coat
made for his ancestor who invented
sapping and mining and saYed o.
braitar from the spsnisrds.
The Washington times., 1920-07-17
Winifred Black Advises Mother to Raise Own Baby

them see what you mean by it-)ust
turn the tables on them. that's all;
and IL they have any sense of humor
or any sense Of justice at all, theyl
laugh and let you alone.
And then you and husband and
baby can have-oh, the incest time
in all the world. and make your
own mistakes and learn your own
lessons and quarrel about them, and
make up again. and be natural and
simple and real-as you were in
tended to be when you were born
And that, 1t seems to me, will be
rather nice.
Copyright 1890, Newspaper Feature
The Washington times., 1920-07-17

and get out into the country before
summer gets here!
You need it. and husband needs
II and baby needs 1t, and while
you're going. get just as far away
from the relatives and the in-laws
and the advisers As you can.
You and your husband and your
baby will be all right when you get
away by yourselves. Get away. as
fast as you can.
A SIMPLE SOLUTION.
II you can't go to the country, 30
somewhere else-to another part Of
town. Don't say why. but Just 90,
and IL they all come trouping to
visit you anyhow. smile and smile.
They won't come very long. II you
move far enough: and when they
begin to advise you about that baby.
be awfully sweet and grateful and
advise them, oh, so nicely. about
some Of their own Affairs Don't let
The Washington times., 1920-07-17

differ" Let us all try to contribute
what is generally interesting.
From MILO H-Don't worry. the
old column is all right She will take
care Of herself. Confne II TO what II
stands for. Heard and Seen.
From FRED sToKEs-were you 10
change present policies. then Heard
and Seen might not be the popular
and interesting feature that IL 10.
Don't spoil 1t. but spread II over more
of the page.
From G. II. MCCARTHY suggest
that III. and S. be left as IL has always
been. The greater the variety OF sub
Jects the better. The mathematical
problems should be kept as they are.
| among the most interesting subjects
treated. If more space could be had
II would be pleasing to many OF the
fans.
From J. p. SIMPSON. Keniiworth-
If you eliminate puzzles and prob
lens, why not eliminate Heard and
Seen?
From ELLEN d. NJ, Alexandria, Va
Put In the column that which
pleases the greatest number OF read
ers. just as you have been doing.
From HARRY NJ. COHEN-Sorry I
can't offer any suggestions for the
| Improvement OF Heard and Seen, as IL
can't be done.
From BETTY M.-Give more space
TO Heard and Seen, as we all enjoy
| IL.
From LEON GoRDoN.-why not
add another column to Heard and
Seen? The clothes are getting toe
| small forit.
The Washington times., 1920-07-17
By Winifred Black.

TN HE baby Is a year and half old,
as fat as butter, and 1t has
blue eyes and brown hair like
floss silk and dimples in it's knuck-
les. and a little crease where it's
head is Joined to tho neck. and no
body can help wanting to kiss
that baby-not when the baby has
on its best white frock and blue
Jacket, embroidered in white with
scallops and blue bottles and has a
perfectly ridiculous ribbon bow OF
blue tied right around it's hair-no
nobody!
And it's clever. oh. awfully clever!
that baby. She says Dada"
she sees her father and Mama"
when she sees her mother. and
when she wants to go riding she
scuttles over to the place where her
little hood is and waves her pudgy
hands and knits her eyebrows and
makes a speech about it--only no.
body can understand what she says.
and nobody has to-because every
body knows.
And she has a white eiderdown
rabbit and a gray flannel elephant
and a woody Teddy bear. left over
from somewhere, and rubber
kewpie doll, and a grandmother and
three ants and four uncles and all
kinds Of cousins.
And baby's mother is just about
crazy.
She loves the baby so she doesn't
know what to do, and her husband
loves her and the baby, and you'd
think they'd be perfectly happy,
They would, too, IL people would
let them alone and stop giving them
advice about that baby.
But the people won't Mother has
her say, and all the aunts have
theirs. and the cousins approve Of
this, and disapprove OF that and
all the In-laws come over and tell
her what never. never to do for her
own baby, unless she just wants to
see 1t pine away and die, right be-
fore her eyes.
Grandma wants to give the baby
n bit Of bacon rind to chew--she
says 1t will develop tho digestion.
Aunt Kate believes In three
hours nap in the afternoon. and
two hours in the morning. and no
going to bed till 10 o'clock at night
THE ADVICE VARIES.
Aunt Mary says the new tangled
idea ns putting child To sleep in q
crib by itself Is all wrong. Babies
ought to sleep with their mothers
that's all there Is TO 1t.
Uncle Harry declares that any
woman who won't feed her baby
every time the baby cries Is a
heartless monster
And Cousin Mary says that the
ono way to spoil baby Is to pov
attention TO II every time " lifts its
eyebrows.
paby's mother has written TO me
about 1t. She ssys she's about die
trsctcd.
She took her baby to tho nearest
baby experts and got some expert
advice and the baby appeared to be
doing perfectly we'll under the
The Washington times., 1920-07-17
THE CROWS NEST

As we hear that a ninety nine-yesr-
old Baltimore woman has been ar
rested as a runaway from home. II
would seem to us as though a per-
son OF such mature years should be
safe from the law. but we guess some
cops were simply born to 60 after
extremes.
, Now come the German coal miners
OF the Ruhr giving the hoot to the
agreements OF their diplomats as
once again the world is reminded
that Teutonic signatures are only
AFFIXED to scraps OF paper.
The Washington times., 1920-07-17

The rocket trip to the moon has
been postponed for a month. but no
matter when it's fred, those who go
along will surely feel perfectly al
home with Mother Luna II they by
chance happen to arrive at their
destination.
Cy Cummings AYERS that he never
bets, but Ia al enthusiastic moment
At the WHITE House admits he has \
few thousand ~ back up his opiniou
al to what Maryland thinks Of Cox.
all OF which puts borrowing friends OF
Cy on notice that he 10 not awaiting
without
The Washington times., 1920-07-17
What's become of the old
fashioned woman who used 10
spit on her handkerchief to wash |
baby's face? w. c. McCI
.sDOwN r STREET wAY.-
(By Jimmy Collins) .

(By Jimmy Collins).
Some one told me that could see
Some vamps a. wild as wild could Be
Down + street way.
So l went down, and looked around;
1t seems the incest part of town,
Down street way.
CHORUS.
All the girlies looked SO sweet
Down F street way;
Not a vampie did i meet.
Down street way.
! saw a lot of he-vamps with manD~
bold and gay,
But not one grille thA. even cast an eye
astray.
30 listen, you cake-eatcr houndr-her~'v
my little say:
You will surely come s-crorpe-
II you look for things improper
Down + street way.
The Washington times., 1920-07-17

From MAXWELL PEARSON. Ber-
wyn. Md.-The column 10 o. X. as IL
is, except that II should cover half OF
one page each day instead OF only
two columns.
From FRED vETTER--As I see 1t.
the reading public, plus Bill. plus
BiIps waste basket, will continue 10
handle the situation quite satisfsc-
torily. As for US nut writer's, all we
care is to see our names in print. IL
each one OF US had his way III. ana 3.
would be q strictly one-man column.
From CHARLES SCHENKEN-The
column belongs to us. we, the people.
You may censor, blue pencil and re-
ject, but don't meddle with the present
system Let II continue to be the
most popular, democratic, cosmopoli-
tan feature OF any newspaper. Your
| column 10 like the old-time family
gatherings. where every member Is
| trying to entertain in his own way,
and everybody is enjoying himself.
| Nobody takes ofrense at our shirt
| sleeve, backyard frolics.
From c. ]. MENASCO-If you ever
attempt to run the column in accord
ance with the advice you will get. al1
| low me to advance you a large hunk
| of fs-y-m-p-a-t-h-y, for you will need IT.
| One that old II. c. l.. has not gotten
| his hooks onto is this commodity
known as advice" which Is gratui-
tously and promiscuously hurled at
| us from every known quarter and a
| lot Of unknown ends. The lady was
running true to form who. when re-
monstrated with about licking the
cat, replied that "everybody's tastes
The Washington times., 1920-07-17
HE is CONSERVATIVE.

Regarding that epitaph by II. F.
SMITH, which wound up with Pre-
pare for death and follow me-
wish to add:
wherever you are I wish you well,
II up in heaven or down in hell
hut to follow you I'll not consent
Until I know which way you went.
JOE FRAT.
The Washington times., 1920-07-17

Score orc Tor
Sir Tom Iipton's
Irish"
Major rer'na'd
Schroeder " used
to fy'rg higher
thau ~ war De-
oartruenl rpn af-
snrd - s'cw him.
4nd a. Ne looks
no. H." N a cap
tains VAR, ths
a : y, ~ iOscS an
rhh'' nne OF It's
-sa! rS"rs.
-
70 tie long l'-t
: tnoSr who have
l,ppi IA O'It OF
something re
AdIsd the District
delegates to the
Farmers Ia bnr
Vary who kept
the platform dry.
The Washington times., 1920-07-17
BRYAN thinks the Democratic
platform isn't dry enough. Let
him read it. It's dusty.
z. NJ. SULLIVAN.

Have you read the new book.
slave Drivers OF the census
written by the card punchers
of the bureau? -Four million
holes per day or walk the
plank" Is the title of the frst
chapter. SELNO.
The Washington times., 1920-07-17
A CLEANUP CAMPAIGN.

Mrs. Jane J. p, signing herself
"Sunshine Jane" recommends that
Heard and Seen folks, who she says
are the "livest people in Washington,
take the lead in a cleanup campaign
in the District. The streets look
shabbier. she says. than ever known
to her. Paper and trash blow every
where, and something should be done
to start a general clean up.
The Washington times., 1920-07-17
11EARlsns sEErkh
By BILL PRICE.
They Say the Column Is All Right
By BILL PRICE

With virtual unanmy, the contributors to and readers
of Heard and Seen satisfied with the way it's
Quoted. Given the opportunity say how they would
the column if they in charge of it, the fans Loyalty
stand by the mixture of fact clean fun wit pep problems
puns, conumdrums, etc. They speak for themselves:
The Washington times., 1920-07-17
CLOSING THE Eyes IN PRAYER

We close our eyes when praying to
concentrate our minds on God and
Him alone, for II one leaves his eyes
open while praying, he will most
likely be distracted by something
that he sees about him and likewise
forget to pray entirely.
EDWARD J. DUyAIL
The Washington times., 1920-07-17

Perley Parker Christensen, rresi-
Dental nominee OF the Farmers-Labor
party, being given a different Chris
tian name by each press association,
must feel as though somebody Is try
ing to put him In tho alias class.
with the little brown man 70 the
South Of MS. In the Philippines and
now IN california and Japan. indulg-
ing In the general racket. IL looks as
though some NJ us may leave eff
seeing red for awh 10.
Thievc. at Connellsville, Pa, stol,
smallpox hospital. Arrest IL be-
Isved futile. as they would in all
probability break out.
WILLIAM NJ. CONRAD.
The Washington times., 1920-07-17
yvrsT ANSWER THESE.

why does 1t always rain when you
60 out in your new palm beach suit!
why, in the name of H and ana
all other nut institutions, does a fel-
low happen to he walking near a mud
puddle Just as big truck comes
along and spatters his new suit with
mud? MorNAb'
The Washington times., 1920-07-17
SOUNDS NATURAL ANYHOW.

The baseball player raped a sharp
hit to the outfield, dropped his bat,
and started to first base. His wife.
viewing the game for the first time,
called out: Jim come back here and
put that bat where you found it,"
JOHN H. d.
The Washington times., 1920-07-17
IT MADE SOME DLFFERENCE.

Cutomer to manager-I wouio
like to see some diamonds.
Manager-"What Is your occupa-
tion?"
Customer-'I'm a plumber"
Managcr-Henry, let this gentle
man have ANYTHING he wants.
JUST A FEW MINUTES LATER
Young mani would like to buy
a wedding ring"
Manager-"Whats your occupa-
tion7"
Young man-"r-I-Tm an offfce
clerk"
Manager-"Im sorry, but we can
not give credit without references,
Bring one from yours bank"
A CLERK.
The Washington times., 1920-07-17

don't believe in tossing saw
dust in anybody's cream OF wheat.
but the guy we ought to mourn for
is the amateur mechanic who tries
to give you advice when your car Is
stalled. THEODORE SAkS.
The Washington times., 1920-07-17
GOVERNOR COX HAD BETTER LET THE DEAL
PAST BURY IT'S DEAD.
Continued from First Column.

Continued from First Column.)
years He avoid having of the burdens Of
the last two years of President Wilson's administration
thrust upon him by his enemies If he has good sense he
will any of them hut he will face forward let
ting the dead past bury its dead including the League Of
Nauons
The Washington times., 1920-07-17
STYLES IN THE ARK DAYS.

Now skirts and stockings. waists ana sucn
Are things no poet dares to touch,
But speaking in a friendly spirit,
And softly 90 no man may hear It,
Dear ladies, may ] not remark,
That hore were short" upon the Ark.
skirts never reached below the knees
w. C.. T.,
The Washington times., 1920-07-17

Won't somebody in Washing
ton start soft drink establish
ments where honest-to-goodness
glasses are used, not thimblcs,
miniature hour-glasses or hollow
paper darts? / want to get re-
ceptable with enough in II to wet
my mouth. JAMES v. COLEMAN.
The Washington times., 1920-07-17

SympathizinE with the $4,000 sur
trage fund for Tennessee and denfr-
ing to do all he can tn spread the
Eight, Senator Thclan sends 1000
more. a. the rest OF the country
awaits the flying OF tho fur
ou' ~ the Jackson Hole country.
ve ars informed that the petticonts
sc blowing IN the sulch~r In the
r'oS' h"slness-lIke sort OF way. and
'ur' MI the bandits are nither evan
'N''Sts. hank presidents. or trying TO
'ptne To- Congress, which proves v, y
let OF us that woman always could
reform the heAhen ~ she vent At
him rlsht
The Washington times., 1920-07-17

A good many cake-eaters are go
ing down to Colonial Beach put l
haven't seen any Of them picked.
That's because they are too broke TO
buv any picking fluid. A. b. G.
The Washington times., 1920-07-17

T.. NJ. SULLIVAN pens his belief
that Hamburg steak and boarding
house hash are made UP OF about
equal varieties of unguaranteed ma
terisls.
MIR. SULLIVAN has received a let
tor from a friend in Siberia stating
that a newspaper can be purchased
there only by permit.
The Washington times., 1920-07-17
THAT OLD GOLD NINE.
r STREET TYPES.

H. II. writes to inquire II there
ever was a gold mine between Glen
Echo and Great Falls. For many
years the lure of gold has tempted
some people to the Maryland regions
close to Great Falls. A good many
people have been "stung" in gold
mine investments in that vicinity, but
nobody has yet struck" gold there.
The Washington times., 1920-07-17

Gossip among us H and Sites Is
that you, Bill, use profanity in as
sorting particularly foolish patches
of H and s stun. That's naughty,
~ true F.. VETTER.
The Washington times., 1920-07-17
HAS FAMILIAR RING.

They say two hearts can beat as one.
Can yours beat time to miner
II so we'll take cour honeymoon
In good old summer time.
IEAp-YEAR Girl.
The Washington times., 1920-07-17
WANTS ,EM NAMED.

Will somebody give the right name
to tho good looking bunch OF toys
who hang around seventeenth street
and park road? 1 hate to call them
cakeeaters .. w. X.
The Washington times., 1920-07-17
Neu.oaper ads,

Newspaper ads:
wanted-High chair for baby
with a cane bottom.
For Sale-LapdoS for a lady with
hap-ears. L. o. W.
The Washington times., 1920-07-17
RED-HEADED vAMPs.

On the subject Of vamps, we have
been warned against red-hcaded
beauties. Now Is IL true that the
red-haired baby doll is any worse In
breaking male hearts than the other
kind? TEDDY AND y. V. ID.
The Washington times., 1920-07-17

From the latest
trail OF n love
mad chauffeur II
would seem that
more than ono OF
'em has now and
and then n Robin
Hood sort OF ex.
Istencc.
The Washington times., 1920-07-17

"TsACHEU's WRONG. ED, ABOUT
THERE BIsIN' FOUR sEAsONs-iTS
JEs JULY. .AUGUsT-AND WINTER"
The Washington times., 1920-07-17

After Resolute
had her sails
sw ] n q ! & like
gates and sham
rock " manages
to finish after the
runa way, what a
satisfaction IL is
to hear a real
sportsman says
it's mot Tom LIP
tons way"
The Washington times., 1920-07-17

NJ e m o ri es OF
G o u mt Perrea rd
and his pspe-
osstile, may they
never grow dim.
Grand Forks herald. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1916-1955, 1920-05-19
NEW YORK.

New York. May ia rather gen
eral decline took place on the stock
market today, the reaction embracing
oils. motors, steels, equipments and
food shares at extreme losses of / to
5 points. Mexican petroleum.. Stude-
baker, Pierce Arrow, Chandler, Re-
public Iron, Baldwin locomotive, At
lantic. gulf and American wooden
comprised the weakest. issues. United
States steel offered some resistance
to pressure and rails suffered only
moderate reaction. Sentiment con-
tinues to be adversely affected by the
depreciation Of Liberty bonds. The
first and second IS and Victory 81 s
recorded new minimums. SOfrerings
of call money at Z per cent failed
to stimulate trading.
The movement of prices was again
mainly downward at the opening of
today's stock market. A majority of
the active issues reacted fractionally,
u Royal Dutch, American Wooden
and Studebaker soon forfeited / to 2
points. Dealings were very light,
pointing to another dull session. In
the bond market, however, there were
early indications of further extensive
liquidation of liberty issues. A block
of $4,000 of the fourth a las
changed hands at $3.50, while the
second 4 las sold 1t S2.40, repre-
senting new low quotations in both
cases. &
The market became more active at
midday but wholly at the expense OF
values, all leaders making further
~losses:s Steady offerings of Liberty
bonds at lower prices and an advance
of discounts by the local federal re-
serve bank directed new attention to
the strained credit situation.
Grand Forks herald. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1916-1955, 1920-05-19
CITY TEAM TO
SEEK REVENGE
Will Clash With University
Players Tonight at Da-
cotah Park.

This Grand Forks city baseball art
lists arc out to take sweet revenge on
the university team this evening.
Although cseaned up by the varsity
team last Thursday evening the locals
have come ahead rapidly since tina,
time and having beaten the Winnipeg
and Hatton teams believe that the
time has come for them to use the
cellegians for mopping-up purposes.
The game will be played at Dacotah
Park at 6:15 O'Clock this evening.
Coach Davis of the varsity is plan.
ming to start the game with Stats
Sinclair on the slab. with Haugen be-
hind the bat to handle his fast mes.
The city team management howev.
rr Is keeping its artillery dispositions
we'll camouffaged, and the dope on the
battery will be uncertain until the bat.
Tic actually begins.
Grand Forks herald. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1916-1955, 1920-05-19
DULUTH.
DULUTH GRAIN.

Duluth. Minn..i May 1s.-Elevator
receipts domestic grain, wheat. 12S,-
800 bushelsl barley, $500; rye, TO-
100 bushels: flax. $500.
Shipnents-Wheat, 514,S0O bu.;
rye. $4,000; flax, 1900.
Duluth car inspection - Wheat,
Nos J. and 2 lark northern and Nos
l and 2 northern, I; No. 3. dark
northern and No. 3 northern, FL:
other spring. 80: Nos !. and 2 amber
durum and Nos l and 2 durum. 32;
No. 3 amber durum and No. 3 durum,
II; other durum. 13: soft wheat, l.;
mixed, Coo; all wheat. 176: naA, 3;
mixed grain. 3; rye, 1906: barley, S;
all grains, 293: on track, %.
Herald Want Ads Bring Results.
Grand Forks herald. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1916-1955, 1920-05-19

AMERICAN LEAGUE
Detroit Wins Another.

Philadelphia. May 19.-Detroit's
heavy hitting continued yesterday
with an 80 victory over Phil adelphia.
Enmkc held the locals safe at all
times. Home runs by Heilmann and
Dykes made the total seven for two
consecutive games here. Cobb stole
home after hitting a triple into right.
Score:
R./H. E.
Detroit ......O2o oO1 023- 8 IL 1
Philadelphia 100, 900 1907 9 6 2
Ehmke and Stanage; Keefe. Martin,
Rommel, Perry and Perkins. Wyatt.
Grand Forks herald. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1916-1955, 1920-05-19
PRODJrCE

New York, May 19.-Butter unset
tied. receipts 1882; creamery higher
than extras 62@62 L.; creamery ex-
tras coz score) 81 q 81 1-2; firsts (SS
to 81 score) 81 1-2@60 1-2.
Eggs irregular; receipts 1854;
storage packed extra. firsts 4S lao
40; firsts as 4S; fresh gathered extra
firsts 47@48; f1rsts 44@46 IA.
Grand Forks herald. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1916-1955, 1920-05-19
WANTED SEALED BIDS FOE coz
TRACT Road WORK

tH |a.t
The Board Of Supervisors of Cleveland
Township. Walsh Co., N. D., wishes to
receive sealed bids from reliable parties
with a good size tractor to pull one 10
IT. blade push grader Bids to specify
so much per hour or per mile for tractor
and operator: Township viii furnish
10000 will be spent on this job. Bids
nay be entered with the clerk Of said
81. 1920. on which date the Board will
meet at 2 o'clock P. N. at the clerks
office fortthe purpose of examining said
bids. Interested parties should appear
iniperson,o on the above mentioned date to
receive specifications. regarding the work
to be done. This job must be completed
The Board reserves the right to reject
any or all bids.
Of May, 1920.
ALBERT JALLO,
c. b. MARTIN. I
j.. N. HUsEBY. Clerk.
Route l. Fordville, N. D: ~
MAY 19-22-26.)