The Bottineau courant. (Bottineau, Bottineau County, N.D.) 1895-1929, 1920-08-26
DIFFERENT STORIES
Of TWO MINISTERS
Mushhead Sensible CD and Deacons
Will Raise His Pay, But Harrison
Won't DO-TeIls Truth

Rev. John Mushhead, the esteemed.
weil-to-do and widely respected pas
tor OF the United Congregation Of
Money -grubbers, at Squirrel Corner,
North Dakota, preached a two-hour
sermon last Sunday in which he de-
clared that farmers, office employees
and laboring men of this state should
be contented with their lot on earth
because eventually they will pass
through the pearly gate and reap
their rewards in heaven" Several
leading financiers in the audience
gave the speaker their rapt attention
throughout his discourse. After the
doxology had been sung they warmly
congratulated him, characterizinx
him as "a safe-and-sane pulpiteer in
these days when so many clerical re-
formers are showing a tendency to
rebel and make war upon Mammon-
or even ally themselves with Art
Townley and the Nonpartisan Leag-
uers." Incidentally, it might be
amusing to record that an entire row
Of gray-haired farmers up in the
Amen corner fell asleep right in the
midst Of Rev. Mushhead's f1owery
outburst of oratory After church
was dismissed the sexton tapped the
sleepers on the head with his walking
stick, rousing them from the land
of Nod.
Rev. Fred Harrison, bold and
fearless minister of Elkhorn, Wis,
wrote communication to the Oour-
ier-News at Fargo, N. D., defining
the word radical" as follows:
Radical, that is the pet word which
ignorance and reaction is hurling at
any one who has get brains and il
using them. The great crime today
is to think, especially on economic
and social affairs" Rev. Harrison
concluded his letter with a demand
that North Dakota farmers, manual
laborers and office workers Aiall reap
their reward on earth.
&AAA
When the same coterie Of Squirrel
Corner financiers who lauded Rev.
Mushhead for his conservative re-
marks" read Rev. Harrison's COM
munication they met in the corner
grocery store that evening, calling
him a crazy, unbalanced, trouble
making, chicken-eating skypilot and
said they wished these blamed pulpit
pounding, pestiferous preachers
would confine their sermons to peo-
ple's conditions in heaven and not put
them up to spelling the gratis Of men
like the Rockefellers, Goulds, Wander
bilts, Morgans, Pillsburys (the Twin
City Flour Kings), or even Us Squirrel
Corner Big Bugs-here on earth.
From the point of view Of the
Squirrel Corner financiers, Rev.
Mushhead is sensible minister, the
type of pastor that John Adams,
chief executive of America when the
first cordially-despised alien and Sc
dition law was signed, would counte-
nance, were he alive. Yes, indeed,
they declare, Rev. Mushhead could
not help but meet with the approba-
ton of statesmen like Adams, Alex
a11der Hamilton or even jeff Davis,
one-time exponent Of chattel slavery
in America. Here's one preacher
who talks about nothing but heaven,
shows that he appreciates the benefi-
cent works of kind-hearted plutocrats
and at an early date the board Of dea-
cons will meet, granting him sub
stantial raise in salary. But how
about that other fearless pastor, Rev.
Fred Harrison? The Squirrel Corner
fnanciers are noisily discussing the
feasibility d organizing Klu Klux
Klan, going over to Elkhom, Wis.,,
and ordering him to quit "poisoning
the mind of the farmer and laboring
man against the idle rich upon pen
atty Of tar and feathers, or deporta-
tion-TO SIBERIA.