The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1920-12-20
IN O. Henry
STORY a Day
/ Humor, Pathos, Romance
Aristocracy
Versus Hash

Stone was wandering up the avenue
kAt night on his way horne from
pe Y. NJ. c. A. rooms when he Was
pproachei by gaunt. hunery-look.
As man with wild eyes and dis
Dheveiied hair. He aocosted the ~
porter in a hollow. weak voice
Can you tell me. str. where I
can find In this town a family Of
scrubs
I don't understand exactly
e q let me tell you how IL is said
~ stranger. inserting his forrfingcr
1thc reporters buttonhoie and bad
n Managing his chrysanthcmum- I
49, representative from Soapstorc
bunsy and I and my family are
puseiess. homeless and sheiteriezz-
~ have not tasted food for over a
5eek. brought my family with me.
- have indigestion and could not
Eek around much with the boys. Some
aHys ago started out to find a
boarding house. "a cannot afford
q, put NJ at hotel. found a nice
a1(stocra,ic looking place. that suited
~ and went In and asked for the
bprietress. A very stately lady
N Koran nose came In tho
5cm. She had one hand laid across
Tier stous--across her waist. and the
I other held lace handkerchief.
fold her | wanted board for myself
Ind family. and she condescended to
Ike ~. I asked for her terms. and
said $500 per week
I had two dollars In my pocket
I gave her that for a fine tea
that l broke when I fell over
table when she spoke
-Youappear surprised. says she.
"a will please rcmembah that am
widow OF Governor Riddle of
brgish: my family is very highly
Injected; give you board as a
Fah: I nevah considah money any
fuivalent for the advantage Of my
pciety. l."
- yell. got out Of there. and I
W. to some other places. The
tnext lady was a cousin OF General
1dahone OF Virginia. and wanted four
dollars an hour for a back room with
! . pink motto and a Burnet granite
bed In IT. The next one was an aunt
n Davy Crockett. and asked eight
Imitation Of the Alamo. with prunes
for breakfast and one-hour's CONVEX.
sation with her for dinner. Another
enc said she was a descendant OF
kBenedict Arnold on her fathers side
knd Captain Kidd on the other.
" She took more after Captain
kidd
~'She only had one meal and pray
hrs day. and counted her society
Dorth 500 a week.
N I" 4 found nine widows Of supreme
judges. IL relicts OF governors and
geperals and % ruins left by various
happy colonels. professors and
majors, who valued their aristocrntic
worth from $50 To $500 per week,
with weakened hash and dried ap-
kpies on the side. I admire people of
Pine descent, but my stomach yearns
pr pork and beans instead Of cuI-
Ere. Am | not right?'
Your words said the reporter
&.cruxince me that you have uttered
mi you have said
"'Thanks. You see how II is
am not wealthy; I have only my per
kdiem and my perquisites. and can
ot afford to pay for high lineage
nd moidy ancestors. a little corned
beef goes further with me than a
oronet, and when ! am cold a coat
n arms does not warm me-
~ greatly fear said the reporter.
with a playful hiccough, that you
have run against high-toned town.
Most all the first.class boarding
|bouses here are run by ladies Of the
bid Southern families. the very first
the land
4 am now Desperate said the
resentative, as he chewed n tack
s51nile. thinking IL was a Glove. Il
Fant 10 find boarding house where
5he proprietres8 was an orphan found
IN a livery stable. whose father was
a dago from East Austin. and whose
! grandfather was never placed on the
map. want scrubby. ornery. low.
DOWN. snuff-dipping. backswoodsy.
. 10 bald gang, who never heard OF
kger bowls or Ward McAllister, but
51o can get up a mess OF hot corn.
uNktand Irish stew at regular mar.
kef quotations.
Is there such a place In Austln7'
'~rhe snake reporter sadly shook
his head. Il do not know he said.
but ! will shake you for the beer
''Ten minutes later the slate in the
Blue Ruin saloon bore two additional
characters 10"