davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington times., 1920-11-05
Beatrice Fairfax
GIVES
Advice.
UNI I'd
Adpice,
HE BELIEVES HE KNOWS.

DEAR MISS FAIRFAX:
don't agree with your answer to "Buddie.'
II the girl seemed to be able to put "Buddie'
in possession Of himself and to make 1t easy
for him to live up to his best. and appeared to
encourage his attentions, he then wrongs all
three not to give the girl a chance to choose
between him and his friend.
Seldom does It happen that any person meets
more than one who Is almost exactly suited to
him. And II the facts stated the chances
are these two natural mates. And the girl
thinking she has no choice in the matter, may
deceive herself into marrying his friend, only
to wake up to her terrible mistake when it's
too late and spend the remainder Of her life in
secret, perhaps, but hopeless misery.
His friend would be nearly as hopelessly un-
happy she.
Why not lay the whole situation candidly be-
fore the girl, give her much time as she
may wish in which to choose, and until she Is
certain as to her heart, ask her to divide her
spare time equally between the two? Then each
neither better nor worse.
Truth and absolute candor are absolutely es-
sential In order that the girl may judge cor
rectly, and thus insure her happiness and that
Of the winner, while the loser, knowing that he
has played absolutely square both to himself
cision was not the result of any misunderstand-
ing, will have nothing to regret or to wonder
about and will therefore find himself able in
me to turn his attention to other people or
things.
Had the writer pursued this course many
years ago, instead of the followed by
''Buddie." he might have saved four people lives
Of misery, and a blight on the children Of one
II not two, families.
ONE WHO KNOWS
The Washington times., 1920-11-05
The School Curriculum

To the Editor Of The Times:
Appropos of the discussion OF the need for
schoorooms In the city, beg to submit a few
scientifically correct opinions
First: four-year course in addition to q
kindergarten Is sufficient schooling for any
child, these conditions only; namely, an
Angecization OF all the arts. sciences and
PHILOSOPHERS, that literary study would be
unnecessary. This accomplished and the text
books Standardized rs to the terms, the ordinary
child OF twelve just entering adolescence could
Finish any trade. profession, art or other course
in six years, and be ready and equipped to take
up the duties OF life on reach ng the dawn OF
adult age, between eighteen and twenty-five.
Public schools OF fine arts, literature, pro-
fessions, etc, could be instituted to meet the
coming needs, and Washington would become
a model for the world to copy. Instead Of be-
ing looked upon as impractical such a system
would be very practical and would give the
world at large a new impetus toward new
golden age. when men and women with one-half
the effort It takes could become self-sup-
porting.
Every state would soon be a willing follower
and ignorance, with all attendant evils, would
be given one last blow in the great drive
against tNe cryptic. hidden terms of the sciences
and arts. Broad mindedness, and tolerances
would be the inevitable outcome of such a push
in the right direction.
Since we have gotten rid OF Old John Barley.
corn. let's get rid of this medieval fake in
education.
The present system requires too much time
and effort and too much money In brick and
mortar, without any adequate results. Here Ia,
too, quicker, more definite system. new
schoo, OF thought must OF necessity arise. Good
schools make good citizens u. NJ.
The Washington times., 1920-11-05
Indian Time.

The American Indians OF early days reckoned
time by what they called sleeps" and moons"
The Indians sleep" referred to a sun-to-sun
day OF twenty-four hours, and his moon" to
what the white man roughly and Improperly
calls q month. The Indians indicated the noon
hour pointing vertically upward. To indicate
the middle OF the first half OF the daylight
period--0 oclock--he pointed upward midway
between the horizon and the zenith, and to In
dicate mid-afternoon--3 o'clock-he pointed to-
ward the opposite quarter. He spoke of the
eastern horizon as Sunrise and the western
horizon az sunset"
The Washington times., 1920-11-05
Peat PAPER.

Peat. long used in Great Britain and ireland
as a substitute for COAL now gives promise Of
taking the place OF wood pulp for the manu-
facture OF paper, says Popular Mechanics Maya
zine. Experiments recently conducted in Man.
chester, England demonstrated the possibility
of making a usable grade of ncwsprint from
bIeached peat pulp, and the inventor displayed
samples of other papers Of various tints, suit.
able for wan papers. waiIboard, wrapping
paper etc. For better grades Of stock, Il is pro-
The Washington times., 1920-11-05
Icy Greenland.

The source OF practically all the icebergs OF
the arctic and sub-arctic regions is Greepiand.
Owing to the northwest set OF the west Green
land currents, the bergs OF this 9 de are carried
first to. the north and II is only at about the
seventy fourth or seventy fifth parallel of lati-
tude that they begin to make their way east.
ward to come down on the American sidA
The Washington times., 1920-11-05

Find two numbers. such that
the square OF the firstl plus the
square OF the second, equals the
cube of the frst minus four
teen; and the sum of the first
and second equals the square Of
the first minus the, square OF
the second. CHEMIST.
The Washington times., 1920-11-05
HE GRAVES MUSIC.

II ever I get to be
Rich as Rockyfellow.
Stead Of schools OF learnin' Grand
I'll endow q German band.
Umpah, Umpah, thru the land,
Music makes 'em mellow.
Ain't no tears a-going to dow
Hearing nddles Quaver,
Takes the good old-fashtonsd bfnrS,
Fife and drum to raise the hair:
UmpAh, Umpah, hear 'em swear
Husics what I prsy for:
The Washington times., 1920-11-05

Astronomers say that our solar sys-
tenn Is wound UP like a clock, and like
q clock 10 running down. The earth.
then, cannot be a perpetual motion
machine, as Milo H. suggests. Seems
as II the universe might be the only
real perpetuum mobile. HOMO.
The Washington times., 1920-11-05
OHIO'S FAME.

Cleveland builds autos. wrought from
Youngstown steel.
There's q rubber tire from Akron on every
auto wheel:
Dayton boasts the Wright boys, who taught
Their. we We're sGos lots Of Of "hop." in cincy before
the States went dry:
Toledo sends US spark plugs and Over
Columbus has 'ohio State" what town
could ask for morer
But after all Is said and done, no poem
could relate
One half the fame that's in your name
OHIO, Buckeye State. OHIO.
The Washington times., 1920-11-05
submit that hailing cabs
and omnibuses Is worse than
raining cats and dogs"
MILDRED.
MUSICAL NOMINATIONS.

By BABE-WILLIE (Jazzbo) DARE.
n. j. avenue. is the jazziest violiniss
In town.
!. By ELSIE C.-HARRIS ATCHISON
Is the real jazz king of this town.
By ADMIRER-ABE DENNIBERG
can put a song over as good as the
best,
The Washington times., 1920-11-05

for Washington. He expressed
himself as heartily in favor Of
the election Of all municipal
officers, utilities and school
boards, and two delegates to
represent the District in Con-
gress.
"The great war was
fought and won for democ-
racy," he said. Democracy
means self determination. It
also means that the peoples
of the world will sooner or
later select their own govern
ments instead of submitting
to autocratic rule. The free
dom of Ireland is coming.
Self determination for the
District Of Columbia is at hand.
The world war will not
.
The Washington times., 1920-11-05
G!|1fARDa RDanSfErfi5Sa

Sambo-Mose. pass me de '1asses.
Mose-How many more times does
have to tell you to say molasses?
Sambo-How can / say mo-lasses
when amt had none yit? J. S. c.
The Washington times., 1920-11-05
Australien Sheep Shearers.

Shearers in Australia ore paid by the number
of sheep they shear. good man will shear
about 100 day. The actual record is 327 sheep
shorn by a Queensland shearer In nine hours
And other big records have been made.
The Washington times., 1920-11-05
"Yes.- she said. his name is
AGAIN. our THANKS.

SO many of the happy family WEI
come the return OF the editor, as well
as give praise to The Spare Tire"
It Is n great pleasure to again ex-
press thanks.
w. d. PAYNE, veteran rooter for
the column. says November 2 brought
punches OF rood news. BILLS back
and wARREN'S coming"
MILO n. joins In with: "BILL
seems just like my old dad coming
back after n vacation or business
trip. The Spare Tire didn't have one
blowout"
The Washington times., 1920-11-05

wIGGLY and GIGGLY, two
Georgetown girls, write that there
are some mighty good lockers in the
Naval Hospital, including WALTER
B., OWEN j., and Garlic H.
The Washington times., 1920-11-05
ANOTHER OPINION.

Don't think that girls are no
good because they paint and
powder. They're a darn sight bet
ter than these here pale face
babies. II you don't like these
painted dolls 60 and find some
pale face James. These little sis
sizes that run around with their
fingers in their mouths are the
BLONDE AND BRUNETTE.
The Washington times., 1920-11-05
CHANGE or NATIONALITY.

A colored girl In a crowded street
car was jostied into the lap OF a
portiy gentleman, who helped her
arise, and remarked: 81 took you for
an African, but you seem to be a
Laplander." II. SMITH,
The Washington times., 1920-11-05
Votes For Washington

In addition to being ardent advocate of the freedom
of Ireland from British rule Congressman Cornelius A.
McGennon of New Jersey is strongly in favor Of votes
The Washington times., 1920-11-05

Liberty will con-
tinue to enlighten
the world.
John Bull win NOT
get the money
and manhood of
free America
pledged to
guarantee his war
spoils.
Indeed, in this
prophetic picture,
Winsor McCay
makes clear that
it is time for
John and his pals to
start the retreat
which will be in
full swing in the.
cold gray dawn
Of two days after.
The Washington times., 1920-11-05
Ye ToWNE low! ]! ;: c.: Gossip IS
BY X. C.. B.

table and cheaper than derbes or felt hats? OF
they Very well, then, why not start cap
movement? You start it in your column and I'll go
right out and buy q cap. Then you buy one and veil
meet and organize and 20 ahead How about it?
The Washington times., 1920-11-05
FOR THE HOUSEWUR

This suggestion appeared our
ing the preserving season: sTS
prevent your preserves worlr1nG.
use LOAF sugar" l.
The Washington times., 1920-11-05
THE EDS TROUBLES.

You editors may dig and toll
TIL your finger tips are sore,
But some poor ash L. sure TO say,
w II, r., jr.
The Washington times., 1920-11-05
JUST BEATING THE CLOCK.

she flashed by me in the entrance hall.
Her face was flushed with fear.
Her chestnut tresses streamed behind,
In her eye there cleaned . tear.
Her heart wss pounding 'gainst her chest
She plowed right through the line.
Shed just beat the clock to .. o,
The Washington times., 1920-11-05

You've entirely overlooked the
War Risk girls in favor OF the Navy
Yard girls. Take a squint at the
pretty girls In the Award Section,
among them FLORENCE WALSH,
ROSE RABOY, KITTY REGAIN,
HELEN LYNN, e. BURKE and
KITTY SULLIVAN. ]. X.
The Washington times., 1920-11-05

Lave been fought in vain Jerseyman and in com
with the people of that great commonwealth believe
that the peoples Of Porto Rico Hawaii and the Philip
pines entitled to the voting privilege surely the highly
intelligent residents Of Washington should be granted that
boon"
The Washington times., 1920-11-05
BLONDE AND BRUNETTE.

SALLY says her cousin in Balti-
more wants to know who is the
"star" performer in THE COLUMN.
She thinks it's MILO H.
The Washington times., 1920-11-05
NEEDS MORE SPIRIT.
DEAR MISS FAIRFAX:


am seventeen years OF age and have
love- He says he loves me. He Is as good to
me as anyone could possibly be when he is
with me-
There is only one fault can find during
these two years, and that Is he breaks so
many dates. Although he vows there Is no
other giL whom he cares for. still I can't
see why he breaks so many dates, unless y IL
on account OF his boy friends taking him off,
or his mother doesn't want him to come.
He gave me lovely ruby ring for my
birthday and acts as though he hates to leave
when he js with me.
Can you advise me as to what to do in
case like this? FLOWER.
Do you not ask him for an explanation of hi,
actions or for the reason for breaking dates
No man should break a date with n woman
without a very plausible excuse Show a littl,
more spirit the next time he undertakes tt
break an appointment p
DEAR MISS FAIRFAX:
I am q young girl OF nineteen, considered
very beautiful, talented and ambitions My
one aim in life hss always been to be an old
maid but mel both young and old, continually
poster me for my friendship and dates.
don't wish to be rude, what sh all I do to keep
them away, AGGRAVATED.
You are evidently one of those sensible poc
sons who has had no experience with pupp,
love- Better wait a while. Some day YOU will
meet the right man, and you'll want to chanet
your mind about being an old maid.
In the meantime II you don't for tn,
friendship Of the men whom you know, you'll
just have to be too busy to see them or to tall
to them.
However, one way to know the right one Il
to know those who are not the right ones.
The Washington times., 1920-11-05

Cloverdale Clubs opening danes
at the Arcade Saturday night All ths
extras. Dust up there.
TOM WILSON.
The Washington times., 1920-11-05
.coLDIIsv WANTS IN. TOO.

II ever you start printing pho
tographs in your column think
I deserve first consideration. 4
have a wonderful new picture
and 1t will make them look moro
than ONCE. Til say. but I'm too
modest to offer It Amt the
clever one, to the world I'll
whisper. GOLDIR-
The Washington times., 1920-11-05
THE FIRST WEDDING RING.

The Wedding ring ddtes back to
the "Tron Age" when mon then
uoated a oirl ou Ne had to do toas
to male an iron ring the sise OF her
neck, 10Th a choin ottoched; hook It
on her aud toke her osooy scttA him.
He ~otc bugs the ring on credn offer
she has "hooked" hin,. BILLIE b.
The Washington times., 1920-11-05

Why not give praise to the ex-
ceptionally good-looking men in the
Tool Shop Drafting Room Of the
Navy Yard? Just look over "NEE-
DLE' MARBURY, "NOSEY" GOD
FREY or any Of the others. r. c.
The Washington times., 1920-11-05

II is agreed by the following that
3o1 is the correct answer to ELMER
o'HARA's problem; H. q. RossELL,
Q. e. D., J. II. r., NAME ORLEANS,
" d PAYNE, U. s. MARINE.
The Washington times., 1920-11-05
HE'S DREAMING.

An + street C. q gives notice that
he's quitting the c. Z. Union, going
away to Chicago with $4,000 cash.
The Washington times., 1920-11-05

A girl whose name was Kate,
Came to work Tuesday very late.
She had gone to the polls
Her vote to enroll
For Mr.. Cox. It's sad to relate.
The Washington times., 1920-11-05
FROM OUT OF TOWN.

o. T. writes from New York that
he sent in 157 contributions 30 Tho
Spare Tire" and didn't get any
printed, but be is going to keep on
+. A. H.. 1t Lake Placid. In the
Adiropdacks, writes that II "GoLDIE'
were up there It would be q case "a
rainbow meeting mountain
Hector and he IL divinely slender;
SO nice looking: 80 cute and sweet.
with such soulful eyes, such per-
feet teeth, such lovely curly hair.
and SO loving" II was her pet
Pekinese pup she was talking about
j. ID. w.
The Washington herald., 1920-04-19
San Reno.

Lloyd George. Milca,d Nitt with their advisers
today bamy OF San Reno the tokens lavish
generosity Russian and German royalties the city
their whom pleasure and breathe the odors of and
Accompanying them advisers the
premers spine stiff.
Settling business makers Of the Of Europe,
and Africa will face problems than dealt with by the
the conference adjourned Unfortunately
during the interval they have and received personal and official
that will make awkward and constrained the first efforts
unitedly. Yet ultimately they do do the
which the French minister of has been talking,
nigh
Neither States, Germany will repre-
this conference huge the total of their
populations their potential wealth. and predestined
their function make world history Possibly Italys
raise the OF this voluntary abstenon by the United States
compulsory exclusion of Germany and Russia Possibly he
supported in this by Lloyd George But whether he
haunting fact will remain for makes against
manency OF the conferences findings
Then that will be easily
the PanTuanan and Pan-Aab upsng the tcnay with which
Soviet Russia obtrudes her and political hee and
demanding formal and the pouring
quarters that the ratified be enforced without
provoking orcbc methods whose predict
\ weary dislusioncd less cynical and ugly tempered
world will await the decisions of the conference with mingled hope
and dread If imagination, wisdom and unsehncs
there will be where of the
kind Italys has nimations that possibly
may required height If he Ntt will become
Immortal"
The Washington herald., 1920-04-19
Naval Orders

Lieut.. Comdr. Myron C. Baker Medical
Corps), Det. U. S. S. Arkansas; TO duty
NIral Hospt, Mare Island. Cal.
Lieut.. jjunior gradel John $. Bessent,
Det conn. L. s. S. Parrott; to Q. s. =.
Borie. ~, ~,
Academy, Annapolis, to U. 3. 3. Connecticut.
Lieut.. Comdr. Richard = field. Det Uniee
Naval Intelligence, Navy Department. wash
invton. to duty as Assistant Naval Attache,
American Embassy. Rome.
Lieut.. Clarence Z. Garcia. dental Corpsl,
Det. Navy Yard. Mare Island. CAL; TO U.
8. 8. Charleston.
Ccndr. Earl p. Hun. Medical Corps), Det.
Naval Academy. Annapolis; to U. s. 5.
Lieut.. Comdr. William d. KiIdur. Det.
Naval Academy, Annapolis; to I. 3. B. oon-
Lieut.. Albert C. Martin. Det. Homestead
Steel Works. Munhall. Pa; to Naval Prov
ing Grounds. Indian Head.
A. p. Clk. Henry +. Rodner. Det. Sub
marine Division 10; to U. s. &. Ohio.
Li,Gt. Emile J. Topp, Det. L. S. s. MI;
to conn. (. o. U. s. s. ST..
Notes.
Capt. Oliver d. Norton (MCD tReD unac-
tiye-Died at Monticello, Santa Barbara,
CAL. March 20. 1920.
Lieut. Comdr. James Reid webb-Died
March u. 1890. at Maedalena Bay.
Lieut.. william NJ. Gorham tCl-2)-Det.
U. s. s. Nero: to L. 8. 8. Pensacola as
Executive Officer.
Lieut.. Junior eradeD John =. L4rkin
tCl-3l-Det. U. s. s. Quincy; to q. s. s.
Gulfport.
Lieut. Austin H. MacCormick tCI-4)--Det.
l.. 4. 8. North Dakotp; to duty Naval
Prison. Portsmouth, y. II.
The Washington herald., 1920-04-19
What Was Gained?

public against
and direct the railway The
process
boring in by flank Like "buddes" who
gone through together supposed
affection between the allies will If the
Board the the nation will
which pleasanter atmosphere
If the leaders of the outlaw" STRIKE who
their followers asking "What ganed"
what their will be-
support enduring op-
their and their method OF asserting their belief
Again shown that in
they will all
of the abore he putting himself above
broken So it will be here,
hbor is defiant We patient goodnatured folk but
inconvenience tyrannes endure
The Washington herald., 1920-04-19
Army Orders

Capt. Leo Joseph Ward. Medical Corps.
Is relieved as assistant recruiting officer
Newark. n. j., and will report by telegrapl
to the commanding general Eastern Depart.
Maj. Harry c. Gardner. ouartermas,er
Corps. is designated as financial manager
and disbursing officer. st. Louis Distric,
Ordnance Ofhce. thereby relieving Mai
Wallace =. Baker. Quartermaster Corps.
Col. Ira y. Fravel, Air Service upon the
be granted him. will proceed to Langley
Field. Hampton. Va. on temporary duty In
connection with dirigibles
First Lieut.. Michael 7. Hayes, Signal
Corps. will proceed from Washington. D.
e., to Buffalo. n. Y; Dunkirk. n. V:
thence to Buffalo, n. Y. on temporary duty
In connection with the production of radio
sets at the Mulholland factory. Dunkirk,
n. Y.
Mai. william X. Naylor, infantry. will
proceed. on or about April 10. 1920. from
Fort Leavenworth. Kan, to Camp A. A.
Humphreys, Va. on temporary duty In con.
nection with the Instruction Of students In
the Engineer School at Camp Humphreys
Capt. Walter L. Reed. Inspector Generals
Department. will proceed to Garden City.
Long Island. n. Y. for the purpose Of
making the annual inspection Of the avia.
tion general supply depot.
Maj. John =. Hunt. infantry. will report
to the president OF the examining hoard
convened by the commanding general East.
ern Department. for the examination OF in
fantry officers. to determine his fitness for
promotion.
Capt. Ira II. Treest, Signal Corps. will
proceed from Camp Alfred Vail. Little sii.
yer, N. j., to Brooklyn, n. ". on tempo
rary "uy in connection with the production
OF signal Corps school property.
Capt. Henry Malinka. Chemical Warfare
Service. is relieved at Lakehurst Proving
Groung. Lakehurst. n. j.. and will proceed
to Washington, d. C.
First. Lieut.. James Clayton Harding
Medical Corps, q. s. Army. Is honotab bly,
discharged from the service. to take effect
at U. 9. Army General Hospital No. IL.
Fox Hills. Staten Island, y. Y.
MAI Walter J. Gilbert. Coast Artillery
Corps. will proceed from this city to For;
Rodman. Mass. on temporary duty In con.
neetion with recruiting.
Maj. William J. Ratisan, Veterinary
Corps. Is relieved at Camp Knox, KY. and
will proceed to Camp Funston, Kan.
Mai. Gen. William L. sibert u. q. Army,
upon his own application, Is retired from
active service with the rank VI major
general
The Washington herald., 1920-04-19

scatters. After a cleaning the por-
trait was moved into safer quarters
in one Of the reception rooms.
Two Philadelphians. Harold b.
Barnett and Curtis 8. Haight. have
taken q prominent part in the COM
munity sings which are q regular
feature of the week at the big Navy
Department Building on the Mall.
Mr.. Barnett, who is chorus leader.
II the son Of the Rev and Mrs. Au-
gustus +. Barnett. well known In
Philadelphia religious circles. Both
men are graduates of the Wharton
School of the University of Penn
sylvania and members of the Pi
Delta Epsilon fraternity. Mr.. Bar
nett is employed by the government
in the Bureau of Internal Revenue.
Mr.. Haisht holds a special appoint
ants to the Naval Compensation
Board. Of which Rear Admiral w.
L. Caps is the senior member.
Bainbridge Colby. Secretary OF
State. was lunching this week at
the Shoreham with q Washington
newspaper man when a man at
the adjoining table came up and
greeted Mr.. Colby effuusively, call
ing him by his first name. When
he had departed. Mr.. Colby asked
his companion who he was. The
newspaper man was as much at sea
as the Secretary OF State. but knew
that he had seen him all over the
world wherever there wasa big
event.
He must be related to the man
who knew more persons that did
not know him than anyone else In
the world" said Mr. Colby.
The Washington herald., 1920-04-19
Notes BY a Washington Obseruer
Custard Pie Comedy in Department of State.
Two Philadelphians Prominent in Commun-
ity Sings-Colby Meets Sociable Stranger

Rear Admiral william 8. Sims,
who has been in Washington during
the past month testifying on the
charges he made against the Navy
Department. has completely recov-
cred from . severe cold which kept
him indisposed for several days.
The Sc. tie Naval Affairs Commit
tee, before whom Admiral Sims
made his charges, will continue
hearings this week. Josephus Dam
iels. Secretary of the Navy. will be
the hnal witness, but the date for
his appearance has not been def :.
nitely arranged as yet.
One would never suspect the De-
partment Of State to engage In COM
edy of the custard pie variety. but
the life-size portrait of the Bey OF
Tunis presented to this country just
after the civil war was moved from
the office Of A. A. Adee, Second As
sistant Secretary Of State for Just
such a reason. For years Mr.. Adee
has taken his lunch at his desk, a
sandwich, a cup of tea and u piece
Of pie. The messenger attached 10
Mr.. Adee's office has orders to bring
in the repast at a certain hour, no
matter what Mr.. Adee may be doing.
On one occasion Mr.. Adee was ex-
tremely busy signing some official
papers and the messenger came In
and left the tray on the desk. MI.
Adee paid no attention, so in hve
minutes the messenger. who knew
that Mr.. Adee detested anything but
the hottest tea, plucked him by the
arm. without looking up from his
work Mr.. Adee cast the pie over his
shoulder. The messenger ducked,
but the portrait of the Bey could
not, and the pie landed just where
a well l-directed movie pie always