The Washington herald., 1920-09-10
CUPID 4 La CARTE


they do. No. I'll tell you what
I'm going to do Name turns.
sudden. to animation and bright
eyes. There's a girl named Susie
Foster in Terre Haute. a chum of
mine. She waits in the railroad
eating house theEe worked
two years in restaurant in that
town. Susie has it worse than
do because the men who eat at
railroad stations gObble. They try
to fiirt and gobbIe at the same
time. Whew, Susie and | have it
all planned out. We're saving
our money. and when we get
enough were going to buy a lit
tie cottage and FIVE acres we
know OF. and live together. and
grow violets for the Eastern
market. A man better not bring
his appetite within mile of that
ranch
Don't girls ever 1 com
menced, but Name heads me off,
sharp.
No. they don't. They nibbIe
a bit sometimes; that's all
- thought the Confec-
For goodness sake. change
the subject says Name.
AS ] said before. that expert
ence put me wise that the femi-
nine arrangement ever struggles
after deceptions and illusions
Take England-beef made her;
wieners elevated Germany: Uncle
Sam owes his greatness to fried
chicken and pie. but the young
ladies Of the Shctalkyou school.
they'll never believe il. Shake
speare. they allow. and Rubin
stein, and the Rough Riders is
what did IN trick.
Twas situation calculated
to disturb couldn't bear to
give up Name: and vet il panied
me to think Of abandoning the
practice Of eating. l had acquired
the habit too early. For twenty
seven years l had been blindly
rushing upon my fate. yielding
to the insidious lures of that
deadly monster, food. 1t was too
late. l was ruminant biped for
keeps. 1t was lobster salad to
dOughnut that my life was going
to be blighted by it,
Il continued to board at the
Dugan tent. hoping that Name
would relent. had sufficient
faith in true love to believe that
since IL has often Outlived the
absence Of a square meal it
might, in time. overcome the
presence of one. | went on minis
tering to my fatal vice. although
| felt that each time I showed a
potato into my mouth in Names
presence I might be burying my
fondest hopes
Il think Collier must have
spoken to Name and got the same
answer. for one day he orders a
cup Of coffee and a cracker. and
sits niJblinE the corner of it like
girl in the Parlor. that's filled
up in the kitchen. previous. on
cold roast and fried cabbage. |
caught on and did the same. and
maybe VIC thought we'd made
hit, The next day we tried it
again. and out comes old man
Dugan fetching in his hands the
fairy viands.
Kinder off yer feed, amt ye
gents he asks. fatherly and
some sardoniC. Thought I'd spell
Name a bit, seein' the work was
light. and my rheumatic can
stand the strain.
so back me and Collier had to
drop to the heavy grub again.
noticed about that time l was
seized by a most uncommon and
devastating appetite. l ate until
Name must have hated to see me
darKen the CIpr. Afterward I.
found out that l had been made
the victim of the first dark and
irreligious trick played on me by
Ed Collier. Him and me had been
taking drinks together uptown
regular. trying to drown our
thirst for food. That man had
bribed about ten bartenders to al
ways put a big slug of. Apple
trees Anaconda Appetite Bitters
in every one of my drinks. But
the last trick he played me was
hardest to forget.
"One day Collier failed to show
up at the tent. A man told me
he left town that morning. My
only rival now was the bill of
fare. A few days before he left
Collier had presented me with a!
two-galIon jug of fine whisky
which he said a cousin had sent
him from Kentucky. / now have
reason to believe that it contained
Appletree's Anaconda Appetite
Bitters almost exclusively. con-
tinued to devour tons of pro-
visions. In Names eyes / re-
manned a mere biped, more ruml-
nant than ever.
About a week after Collier
pulled his freight there came a
kind of sideshow to town. and
hoisted a tent near the railroad.
I judged it was a sort of fake
museum and curiosity business. Il
called to see Name one night and
Ma Dugan said she and Thomas
her younger brother, had gone to
the show. That same thing hap
pened for three nights that week. !
Saturday night I caught her on
the way coming back. and got to
sit on the steps a while and talk
to her. ] noticed she looked diff |
ferent Her eyes were softer, ana
SHINY like. Instead of Name
DuSan to fly from tho voracity