South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1920-06-06

Edu, contributed 5000 600 10 Gen.
Woods campaign fund. the idea
being 10 have a clean campaign.
Gov. LOwden plunked down nearly
$500. 900 Of his own money. Demo
Gratis. your need only about four
grains OF common sense at San
Francisco. Pray for it.
Young Hiram johnson Is quoted
as having said: Nominate dad. or
the country Will go democratic"
Nothing is more charmingly inno-
cent than adolescence clinging with
mistaken loyalty TO the paternal
raZzle dazzle.
There are the elements OF both
joy and sorrow in boiled cabbage,
and it Is for intelligence 10 estab-
lish the dominion of cabbage JOY.
Cultivate cabbage happiness.
viii Scotland go dry?" asked T.
H. Ahara Of US. II Scotland should
go at all IL would have 20 go dry.
but since few OF us living today are
likely 10 remain on earth more than
100 years. we do not think this
query is anything TO become excited
over.
The situation will change for the
better when men come 10 see that
real life consists of doing as much
work as they can for the money
instead Of as little as they can for
the money. If the work is important
az all. it's more important than
money.
Eve must harmonic our differ
ences like good republicans" says
VIII II. Hays. Who ever heard OF
good republicans?
only one thing seems certain
this year The greatest man in the
country viii not be nominated or
elected.
Gen. Pershing is probably glad
that he elected to remain a hero.
Now that everybody has taken
en- of. We proceed a step further
in the season and announce short
sleeves for the women and rolled
up sleeves for the men. But in
every case the individual must main
tain nicely sandpapered elbows.
When mother begins TO keep
boarders and the four girls get jobs
at the Wooden company, you are
mighty apt to fird father sitting on
the front porch the greater part of
the day smoking his pipe in peace
except at meal time.
Whisky sells in ireland. at 40 cents
a glass and is said to be plentiful
If that's the situation, Britain is
in, hn
Emerald Isle. And if you know
what Irish whisky is, you'll make d
book on it.
OF course, the senate is raising
some dust in showing the high cost
of campaigns, but il would raise
more Amens and Hallelujahs from
the proletariat by showing some
lower cost OF sugar, potatoes and
bacon.
Well. the Grand Old Piehunters
are trekking to Chicago, where the
hotel keepers have their leg grippers
al! ready for the occasion.
We have discovered a Mishawaka
woman who can keep a secret. This
shows that there are more things in
heaven and earth than Horatio ever
dreamt of in his philosophy.
There is a great deal OF poetry
about June as a month of roses,
love and weddings, but when you
get away from June's poetry, you
stagger at the ice and laundry bills.
ASK a thousand different men who
is the prettiest girl in the world
and they'll name different girls,
says a writer. That's the way it
ought TO be. Beauty is Of the soul,
and there can be but one prettiest
sirl in the world for any one man.
If the Chas. Roy family come to
live in our aristocratic neighborhoOd
in an endeavor to capture the bridge
honors that rightly belong there. we
see where we Will have TO brush up.
Atty. l. K. Parks. we are told
surpassed himself in that address
to the jury during the past week.
That Isaac can be both brilliant and
logical when in the humOr is no lie.
We're for him for judge.
We saw George williams at work
with his lawn mower the other
in trim for the fremens convention
at MiShawaka this month.
Since Chevrolet drove a Monroe
car first to the winning post at the
indianapolis classic recently, we see
Blithe Buchanan on the streets at
all hours Of the day and night i'm
his speedster. He tells us he sold
IA Monroe's as a result of Chevro-
let's success. Ii may be so.
The street sensation this week was
the remarkable feat performed by
PatrOlman Charles Ainely who lifted
425-pound gypsy woman, carried
her Of Yards and dumped her into
an automobile containing her hus-
band and / 9 kids
We suppose we should he thank
full that potatoes and sugar have
rot fallen into the category OF boot
1ocuor com IN odfffpg