davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1920-03-17
Topics of the Times

Sioux City is to take another test.
Short is a candidate for reelection
to the mayorality. II might have
Just happened the first time but II
they do il again, why that will be
deliberate.
The military candidate" did pretty
we'll, thank you. in Minnesota.
An exchange notes the number of
baby buggies offered for sale at
second hand and wonders II folks
are closing out on the babies. Well,
it's a mighty expensive thing to
have a baby. or to die nowadays.
They seem to get 'em coming and
going and meanwhile.
as secretary of state followed the
requested resignation of w. S. Allen,
has announced his candidacy for the
republican nomination to that office.
Mr.. Ramsay has been a competent
man in office and is deserving Of the
nomination which he will naturally
receive. Little opposition is likely
to develop.
Some captured German cannon
would look well beside the civil war
relics in Iowa parks and courthouse
squares and, according 10 the Wash
ington correspondents. about all the
congressman have to do is ask for
them. 1t appears that we picked up
a lot of them While the picking was
good.
Germany escaped the horrors of
war by invasion If she chooses to
work out her own punishment by
civil war no great sympathy need be
extended her. Germany has not bid
for world kindness and interest: and
it seems that very dangerous part
Of her population still banker to be
ridden and ordered by the Hohen-
zollerns and the militarists. That
country will have to show fruits
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1920-03-17
SEE THAT HE GETS HIS CHANCE.

The Vocational summary Is
published monthly by the Federal
Board for Vocational Education" a
perusal of its pages would indicate
that this board is accomplishing
great things. 1t tells all about how
il should be done and how it intends
to do it, quotes this and that expert
and finally as proof of the activities
of the board and its preeminent sue
cess relates the cases of three dis
abled" veterans who are making
good, one as a tire repairer, another
at a school of fine arts and a third
at a school for cartoonists-
But how many of the disabled
men are being given the chance
promised them and which belongs to
them? How many boys among the
thousands who have earned and to
whom belong the chance are still
waiting and wondering?
When a wounded lad comes to
ask what can l do, how can I get
to go to some school where l can
learn TO make a decent living" sick
boy unfit for hard labor. who needs
a friend and who has earned it, the
query of what the board and the
examiners are doing crops up. This
boy had been drafted and had been
wounded overseas and given a SIG
disability. He can't shovel dirt or
carry a hod. What is he to do with
himself?
There are many such boys. phys.
ically incompetent and by reason of
physical weakness and loss of hope
otherwise incompetent.
Now what are we to do with
those Which is the better plan to
let them drift into a semi pauperism
on SIC disability pay 'or strive to.
make them independent, earning
citizens. Which is the investment
and which the loss?
It will soon be too late to do any
thing for them. 4 couple of years
will do for them. If these men are
to be benefited by the vocational
plan, it must be applied now. And
the vocational board seems to be
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1920-03-17
Stock DivldSnds.s

The supreme court decision !, that
stock dividends are not taxable as
income was, on the whole, expected.
The principal surprise is that four of
the nine justices should deliver dis
senting opinions. The decision
draws clear distinction. between
capital and income. and emphatically
classlnes stock dividends as capital.
It points out that such dividends do
not necessarily imply increased in
come, that whenever they do result
In such increased income It auto
matically becomes taxable, and that
to tax the stock dividends AZ in
come would compel the owner to
diminish .1.s o ::r!:. Is 20, the tar
When corporation distributes an
issue Of new stock among its share
holders. on the basis Of accumulated
profits, it does not distribute money
or other, income. Il distributes
paper certifcates' OF the fact, that.
the shareholds1s capital has been
increased in business. but absorbed
in such q way that it is impractic-
able to withdraw the accumulation.
The stakeholder may receive a larger
incons because lot his larger stock
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1920-03-17
! Ohm Burroughs
.&Nss''ss:s.

I. DO the red squirrel. the chip
munk. and the gray squirrel lay up
winter stores?
2. How does the. cat-tail flag
spread?
8. Why does the female bird usu-
ally build the nest?
Answers to Yesterdays Questions.
/. How does man differ from low
or forms Of animal life In oyercom-
ing wasted tissue7
When hostile germs from without
invade a mans body, ha Ia Ill. he has
n chill, a fever. an inflammation. but
little he knows Of the warfare-the
struggles. the defeats, the deaths
that are going on In his tissues. some
OF the lower forms have the power
of regeneration. or OF re-growins
lost part-a tail. a section, a limb
but mans body lost this power when
II took on its highly organized nerv-
Gus system with its hugo complex
brain.
2. Is the COW thoughtful when she
chews her cud?
AS u matter OF IdCt, SuppoSS 80
more vacant mind could be found in
the universe than that OF the COW
when she is reposins in a field chew
ing her cud. But she Is the cause OF
tranquil II not Of great thoughts IN
the lookers-on. and that is enough
Tranquility attends her wherever she
goes; it beams from her eyes. ana
fingers In her footsteps.
8. Have young ducks an instinc-
tive desire to enter the water?
The statement that young ducks
have no instructive impulse to ente'
the water is misleading. Why, then
do they enter 1t voluntarily? Iouns
ducks have no instructive recogni-
ton of water thru the eye. but they
have thru the feet: the moment they
feel the water with their feet, the
impulse to enter is awakened, ana
away they go. Is this true of chick
ems? Neither ducks nor chickens
know water thru the sense of sight,
but by the sense Of touch.
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1920-03-17
Ripping Rhymes
Bv WALT MASON
NO AUDIENCE.

AUDIENCE.
its ecest pangs they claim to know;
in tale Of Oh none
attention wall
the flu I'D like to have some chse disease
affection Of the knees or an
ofhes original
could I've had that anenf
with high dsdain all the people Of
wekin echo with song alas
along Oh
around
And will listen to spiel
tough feel for all the
boys
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1920-03-17

meet for repentance before civiliza-
ton does much weeping over her in
ternal troubles.
ANY kind of road patrol system
will do that delivers a good road ana
keeps it SO. Any other system will
not.
Seems like the Hearst editors
ought not TO be sent to Jail so much
for what they don't as what they do
toll
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1920-03-17
WLNDY DIRECrORY
-op TIVE
MASONIC TEMPLE
~ Masonic Meetings
0 Vis,tors Always Welcome.

MARSHALL LODGE NO. los a,
r. A. NJ, Friday. March ID, az 7'so
o'clock. Business session. e. u
Jennings. w. NJ; John w. Wells Sec
rotary.
sYGNrr CHAPTER. No. -, ". a.
NJ. Monday: March 20, 1880. business
conyocation. Frank T. Nokes' H. ~
John w. Wells. secretary.
KING SOLOMON COUNCIL No
% states assembly Monday. MarcA
., business sessions. O. G. FOX
master: John w. Wells, recorder
coNcI.AvE ST. ALDEMAR COM
.aNDERY No. - x. T.. TnesdaV'
March g, 1880 o'clock. The Temple
ona business session. C!Tce y.
stewart. commander; John W. Wells
recorder.
CENTRAL CHAPTER No. 81 q. r.
REGULAR meeting wednesday
,,,rch ~. at 1880 for business. w. u
Richards, w. NJ: Mrs. Archer Walton
secretary.
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1920-03-17
DEMPSEY BACK IN FORM.

DEh SE D<hNEN ~ 4 Oxs-'Ks
ICouncil Bluffs Nonpareil.
The manager of Jack Dempsey
SAYS. we won't go to Europe to
fight" This makes 1t clear that he
and his protege are running true to
form. This Is the second time Jack
has ducked the proposition.
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1920-03-17
DOLLARS AND SENSE.

[Sioux City Journal.]
The business manager Of a news
paper office supplies the dollars and
the editors supply the sense.
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1920-03-17

SWAIN TO HIS
CHARMER.
IL you were a picture post card
And were a 2-cent stamp,
I'd stick to you close as her lover
Sticks to movie yamp.
But maybe I'm really q villain
However you may construe 1t,
I'm obliged to say in my tactless
way, .s
I'd have to be licked to do 1t.
We hereby offer q prize Of two
volumes of the city directory for
1898 and 1908 to anyone who, over
swer to the following simple ques-
ton: What number Is this,
please?" The best we've ever been
able to get is, "What number. do
you want?"
Funny to see the presidential
candidates banting to get rid Of their
superfluous opinions, isn't It?
The fashion magazines inform us
that Paris has just moved the waist
line again. IL doesn't agitate US a
mite. Our waist. line Is where our
suspenders meet our pants-and the
only way it's going to be moved is
slowly and steadily forward in the
direction it has been travelling for
several years.
All England Is greatly concerned
over the shrinkage of the pound.
We've noticed 1t over. here, too
especially in the grocery stores.
BILL BLAKES RELEASE. Z, &
I've just put twenty years in stir:
Now I'm a bundle stiff.
My feet plug down the highway. but
My head keeps wondering II
1 couldn't find my corridor. ~
And crimp the trusty's key,
And then tell myself again.
You're free. Bill Blake--you're
feel"
It's chilly hereabouts at night
used to have bed
And four strong walls. but now I've
got
No place to lay my head
generally have TO flop
Beneath some whispering tree.
And all night long the leaves they
sigh:
You're free. Bill Blake-you're
free!"
They claim I. wasn't crook enough
To get sent up for life,
But twenty years was plenty for
My children and my wife.
wish the Devil or the Lord
It makes no odds to me-
Would stop me on the road and
say:
You're free. Bill Blake-you're
free!"
It would be an awful thing for the
republicans If st. Peter turned out
to be q democrat.
"The unspeakable Turk" seems to
pc inspiring a lot of speaking.
They're going to take away his
navy, they say. All that now re-
mains to do is to take away his land
and leave him swimming about in
the Bosporus.
Spring fever pome:
Spring has come:
Ho-hum!
Isn't 1t amazing how the sterling
ret-.ct who has No deeire tn Obtain
the nomination for president ham
mers his colleague whom he sus-
poets Of leanings in that direction?
F. +. v.
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1920-03-17

81 -. y
\ s',,'A..s|
~ ~. !
- ~
100
In..x~|
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1920-03-17
The Windnill'
OUR GREAT SERIES OF HEART

OUR GREAT SERIES OF HEART
SONGS.
why Did They Take My Booker
l met very sad.eyed man.
His face was full Of gloom
His eye was cloudy like the sky,
A shadow there did loom.
asked him what the matter was.
He shook his head and sighed.
He dropped a tear or two. he did,
And this Is what he cried:
Chorus:
Pink lizards and blue elephants
My way they used to light.
And snakes that wrtggled round and
round
Made life for me quite bright;
Green Appropriateness danced
Them baby hippo blues;
I used to see all kinds o. things,
Why did they take my boozeY'
I tried to cheer him UP bit,
/ sang to him a song,
But when my last sweet note was
out
His face was just as long.
l couldn't make him smile or grin
No matter how tried;
I told him all the jokes know
And when stopped he cried:
es rr Chorus.
RED monkeys and green kangaroos
They used to make me glad.
And purple chimpanzees did cheer
My heart when 1t was sad
And whales that were most hello
trope
Did take me on a cruise
l used to have all kinds O. fun.
Why did they take my booze7"
An optimist il a person who car
ries corkscrew in his hip pocket.
Obviously the president doesn't
use a noiseless typewriter. ~
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1920-03-17
Spring fever pome:
Spring has come:
Ho-hum!

Isn't 1t amazing how the sterling
ce.-sot who has M desire IL Obtain
the nomination for president ham,
mers his colleague whom he sus-
poets Of leanings in that direction?
F.. F.V.
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1920-03-17

All England Is greatly concerned
over the shrinkage OF the pound.
We've noticed 1t over here, too
especially in the grocery stores.
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1920-03-17

They're going to take away his
navy, they say. All that now re-
mains to do is to take away his land
and leave him swimming about in
the Bosporus.
The St. Joseph observer., 1920-05-22

as well as a strangerl Make her glad
you've come home instead of worried
about il. Make her feel that you
sympathize with her. Make her feel
that you're a friend she can always
depend upon to cheer her up, instead
Of feeling you're just husband who
is pretty handy with the harsh words,
Go further than this-not only
treat your wife as a stranger, but try
to be as entertaining in your own
home as you would when visiting a
strange household. Try out your
new jokes on your own family--you'n
find your family the most critical
audience in the world. You'll be
kidded when you try to be entertain
ing your jokes will be laughed at in
the wrong places. you'll be made fun
Of and all that, but believe me IL you
can entertain your own family you
can make good anywhere as an agree
able fellow-a good scout" A story
that the family will laugh at has got
to be real bang-up story.
Try this out-and then after the
trial, if you are not able to get out Of
the house, write and tell this paper
your conclusions.
The St. Joseph observer., 1920-05-22
WHY Is THIS, CHIEF TOM?

Every day the Gazette and the
News Press give the list of those au-
tom mobilists who have been yanked up
before Police Judge Gray. by Tom
Moore's mlnions of the law-but there
never is a motorcyclist among the
number of speed regulation violators.
and it has caused this organ of pub
licity to wonder why?
Is a man driving a motorcycle i'm
mune from prosecution? one would
think so from the manner in which
the two-wheeled devils behave.
The driver Of an automobile today
is in far greater danger Of being call
ed to account for law violation than
is the manipulator of the motorcycle,
able to do a great deal more speed
on any sort of road. Motorcycles
run around, about and over us at
tremendous clips without a word be-
ing said by the police. The automo-
bile that SWITCHES" a meager mile or
two is likely to be harpooned by the
gendarmes.
Our advice to Chief Tom is TO
watch the motorcyclist as well as the
motorist.
The St. Joseph observer., 1920-05-22
KNOX HAD TO SUSTAIN WILSON

For once Senator Knox was forced
to sustain President Wilson-for the
simple yet ample reason that he could
not get away from so doing. Not
that he did not want to get away,
but he could not-that's all.
When he opened the debate In the
Senate over the peace resolution his
speech was mysterious owing to the
position he took contrary to so many
of the other senators, for part of his
speech were destructive of the very
resolution that he had drafted. He
even denounced as false one of Sena-
tor Lodges favorite Characterization
of his own work on the covenant of
league of nations.
The highest praise the Lodge reser-
vations have received from the Mas
sachusetts senator's admirers ha,
been that he "Americanized" the
league of nations. Mr.. Lodge himself
invariably rejoices in public speech
over the miracle of characterization"
nc has performed. Now comes Sena-
tor Knox rudely declaring:
ut has been said that reservations
proposed in the senate Americanize
the league. This, of course, is not
true. They tend to make it safer for
America to enter the league by re-
fusing to be bound in many important
particulars by its action. But this
especially insured relation created an
inequality which was dangerous"
Despite all his fury at Mr.. Wilson,
the Pennsylvania senator in that pas
sage has upheld the president as
Lodge reservations. Mr.. Knox and
MIR. Wilson are in substantial agree
nent. When MIR. Knox says that by
the reservations America would re
| fuse to be bound in many important
| matters" by the leagues action, he
says in effect what the president said
in denouncing reservations that were
nothing but qualifications. Mr.. Knox
Is quite as scornful as Mr.. Wilson in
denying the virtue of the American
| ization" flubdub. He furnishes Mr..
Wilson with ammunition against Mr..
Lodge in declaring that the reserva-
tions created an inequality that was
| dangerous" That Is what the presi-
dent has believed all along. The
president is justified out of the Penn
sylvania senator's own mouth in re-
! tions.
The St. Joseph observer., 1920-05-22
POLITICS INSTEAD OF PEACE

While Senator Knox sophistry sup
carried the day in the Senate Satur-
day, when the gop plan to declare
peace by resolution went through by
bare majority. his entire argument
made before that body was but plea
Of evasion, for with all of his artifices,
he had at last 10 rest his argument
upon assertions having no basis of
law or fact.
THE war is at an end" he ex-
claimed many times, which is true
as regards the western allies and
Germany and positively untrue as
concerns ourselves. The only way We
can end the war is by treaty, and the
only treaty in existence is the one
that the United States senate has re-
jected. Under that agreement we are
assured the fruits OF victory in addi-
ton TO the blessings OF peace. The
senate resolution contemplates moth
ing better than a separate negotia-
tion with Germany and a separate
| peace.
Knowing that the resolution, IL
passed over the presidents veto. will
come under the eye Of the supreme
court, Mr.. Knox processes confidence
in the judgment Of that tribunal
which we can hardly believe that he
feels. Upholdlng the war prohibit
tion law, the court last December
said that "in the absence Of specific
provisions TO the contrary the period
OF war has been held TO extend "a
the ratification Of the treaty Of peace
or the proclamation of peace" The
senate has failed to ratify the treaty
OF peace, and there can be no Lawful
proclamation OF peace until it does.
The senator's recital Of the evil
Of war powers exercised in time Of
peace is the one part Of his address
which will stand examination. Ir
that. however, no convicts himself
The St. Joseph observer., 1920-05-22
should Have Been Defeated

That was a very silly resolution
passed at the Joplin convention con-
graduating Bryan over his election
as delegate to the National Demo-
cratic convention. Nobody particu-
larly cared whether he was or was
not a delegate. but for Missouri DEM
ocrats to pass a special resolution on
the subject just after President Will
sons policies were indorsed was in
consistent to say the least as Mr..
Bryan was not in sympathy with the
president. The resolution was an af-
front to President Wilson and to Mr..
Clark, whom he (Bryan) robbed out
OF the presidency. 1t should have
been promptly tabled or defeated
Boonville Advertiser.
The St. Joseph observer., 1920-05-22
WHAT AFFLCTS YOU WITH
"NERVE.S"

For a long time past-but especial
ly since the world war began-the
American people have been suffering
with what is now national disease.
nerves" They are produced by those
three old friends, Hurry, FURRY and
Worry.
Hurry. FURRY and Worry never go
on strike. II they get you. yours is
a short life and a quickly buried one.
Hurry always believes today is the
last day in the calendar. Furry is
always falling upstairs, tripping over
his feet Worry is a disease of the
Imagination. He forgets that tomor-
row is merely yesterday that hasn't
arrived yet. and that yesterday moth
ing much happened.
Hurry, FURRY and Worry-if you
can lick those three roughnecks you
will begin to yell "Eureka!" and "Ex
celsior!" In one breath. The knucklei
in your spine will turn to steel, anC
the fear in your eyes will be beater
into cleaning swords of will.
The St. Joseph observer., 1920-05-22
TREAT HER LIKE \ STRANGER
PROVIDING

There is a man in this town who is
the pioneer Of new method--and a
daring pioneer is he toO-for there
are but mighty few men who will
dare that much with his wife-and
succeed.
This man wanted to be happy In
mis- home and get away from the nag
ging. quarreling and fretting that
marred his home life. He tried a
number Of plans which failed, and
finally hit upon the idea Of treating
his wife like a stranger. And it
worked:
Let's see.
It's been a busy day. You're pretty
well worn out-in fact, it's hard TO
drag yourself home. When you en-
ter the house your wife looks cross
and tired. It's been hard day for
her, too. She looks at you tragically,
The groceries didn't come" she an
nounced in the-end- Of the world
is-here voice. and the baby spilled
the milk and there's almost nothing
in the house to eat!"
Rather a nasty thing for you &c
bump into after your strenuous days
work ch? But wait,
Suppose yos had been taken hom'
by business friend for dinner snC
this friends wife had met him at tn,
door with similar announcement
You, as a stranger to the wife. woult
naturally feel sorry for her. You''
do your level best to cheer her up
make her feel that perhaps It WASH
such a terrible tragedy after all
You'd do your utmost, for your owl
sake and for the sake of the stranger
to obyiate the family quarrel. an,
the fretting and harsh words 80 FIRE
quently arising from such a situation
II you'd do as much as this for
stranger. why not do as much, an
more. for your own wife, Treat he
The St. Joseph observer., 1920-05-22
THIS WILL NEVER STAND

A resident of New Jersey, and the
father Of a family refuses to have his
sick daughter treated except by
Christian Science practitioners. The
child dies. The father is brought to
trial for gross negligence" and the
jury brings in verdict of man
slaughter.
The charge of negligence" is ridic-
ulous. The father was not, on the
face of the facts, negligent. lie fol-
lowed out his belief that the best
treatment for his daughter was by
Christian Science. The issue is wheth-
ol such belief is criminal
There is not a chance in the world
for such a verdict to stand, When a
state or community passes a law or
or quarantine, or other specific scien-
tific action, disobedience is illegal.
and may be criminal, and this despite
the fact that disobedience of the law
may seem to the individual morally
necessary. In such a case, the Chris
tian Scientist may become, in the
true and honorable sense of the
phrase, a conscientious objector."
But the New Jersey jury sets up
the group judgment OF one set of
men against the group judgment of
another and declares the difference
Of opinion crime. 1t is as vicious
an attack on freedom of opinion, as
vicious an attempt to interfere with
religious thought. as has been seen
in America.
Suppose the father had consulted
homeeopath and jury Of allopaths
had declared him criminal? Sup
pose. instead of consulting the health
officer of Newark, he had gone to
his own family physician? Suppose
he had yielded to advice and put the
case in the hands of a regular ply
sician. and the child had died? In
any of these cases his judgment would
have conflicted with the judgment Of
some one else-but what Of it?
The right of a nation. a state, a
community. to make laws to govern
all the inhabitants thereof is not in
question. The effort to declare that
opinion is law is fundam entally op-
posed to every principle of the mod
! Crn state.
The St. Joseph observer., 1920-05-22
They Can't Scare Cowgirl

Mayor Cowgirl. of Kansas City, has
taken the wind out of the republican
control of the late city election by
asking immediate trial and insisting
that 1t be completed before the Aug
ust primary. The republicans had
no thought OF having to make good on
their charges but expected to howl
from the housetops about the frauds
in the city election until the primary
was past and then forget.-Moberly
Democrat