davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Mellette County pioneer. [volume] (Wood, Mellette County, S.D.) 19??-1971, 1920-11-26

4 asa week when Saturday night
e was juaa Douta close UP .aud
Gueeta work | no fee!a yer good. |
gotta money but no mocha pep. |
stoppa one place where SelIa ia flow
erS for gecya look. Was lcetle kced
outside bouta SecXa years Old. lie
SCila ia paper but he gotta plenta
left WOt he no Seiia yet.
He aSka me. please, mecster, YOU
lika buy ia paper?" | say, "Wot's mat
ter YOU no sella before dees? Every
body stoppa read Tor 90 to bed now"
! aSEa eef he wanna gotta rich one
day. He say no Wanta getta rich
iusa buy hces mudda buncha flowers
ror Sunday. lieeS name Jimmy Brown
ana he tella me hecS fadda 80 dead
Tonga time. He say tomorrow was
WAS wien hoes mudda gonna lava Ga
Birthday.
~ lika to buy my mrdda some flow
prs SO | Try sclla more paper" he say.
"Ecf I sclla every one | gotta plenta
money. | BETA, mecSter, my mudda
sure glad oef | gceva her flowers for
ia present. Wonta YOU please buy
jula one papcr?"
You know | reada paper Tonga time
before dat night. But | lika dat leetle
Jimmy Brown ALA right. | no Wanta
hecm gotta wise 50 | say | gotta TWEEN
ty-tive kceds my family and everyone
wanta newspaper and | buy da whola
works.
And righta queeck Jimmy Smila 50
bccg and 90 buy hecS mudda some
flowers. He say, "Tanka YOU. Mees-
ter" and den he walka home maka
plenta noise weeth wheestle. lie sure
was glada keed ALA right.
Jusa between you ana mt no for
sprpada round TO Jimmy. | no gotta
twcnty-fva keeds and | no wanta alla
dat paper. But l wanta see Jimmy
geeva heeS N da beega bOquet
for present. l buy everyone da paper
he gotta and when he ees gone l
trOw cen la waste can.
Pretty queeck / no feela seeck any
more and | starta wheestle, too. SOM
ating maka me feela good ALA for
sudden. Mebbe was dat tune Jimmy
wheestle.
Wot YOU tink?
The Mellette County pioneer. [volume] (Wood, Mellette County, S.D.) 19??-1971, 1920-11-26
OF SUCH THINGS ARE DREAMS
Remarks That flight Well Be Chased
Under the Head Of "lmpoSsibIe
Paragraphs"

"What, Only 81 for Il steak with
potatoes? Wen, ! must say that IS
very reasonable! Here, waiter, take
this SO and keep the change"
%"Spiffkins, the boss says YOU can
have IL two months vacation with pay,
instead of the usual two weeks. And
he wants me to notify YOU that he will
pay all expenses"
Stay out as late as YOU please, dear
and have Il good time. y married
man is entitled to jump the fence once
in a while"
Dear Sir: We want YOU TO try cur
new brand Of granulated sugar and
beg you TO accept a l0-pound sample
free Of charge"
isn't this near-becr delicious? |
think it is much superior to real beer,
don't your
"COme on down to my house, Jim,
and I'll give YOU q case Of whisky. I've
got more than | can use myself
Cincinnati Enquirer.
The Mellette County pioneer. [volume] (Wood, Mellette County, S.D.) 19??-1971, 1920-11-26

She does n0W-she must learn some
ding from watching two such experts
as we are"
And this was the reason puSSie
White was 50 unhappy and as she
washed Ter face she was thinking how
she could catch more mice and show
Tabbie and BlHckie that She was just rs
mart us they thought themselves to be.
luS9.c White had a friend that lived
down the road, so She took herself
or to tell Peter Dog her troubles.
Peter was u very wise little fellow
played together when pussie was Il
kitten, and she had never scratched
him as the other kittens had done.
Il think l can help YOU, pussie,"
said Peter. Il am not at all fond Of
mice. but | am sIre | can catch them
and tonight if YOU can manage TO
keep Blachie and Iabbie away from
the barn | am sure we can catch mice
enough TO surprise those two spiteful
creatures"
That night when the three pussies
were eating their supper in the farm
house Kitchen PuSSie White slipped
away before the others had finished.
Down the cellar stairs She ran and
climbed out Of the window where
there was an opening for the pussieS
to 90 in and out.
When PuSSie White went out she
managed somehow TO knock the board
that was fastened on the outside and
down it slipped right Owe the open
ing.
Some time later when Blackie and
Table wanted to go to the barn for
the night, as they always did, they
had To stay in the cellar all night.
The next morning TusSie White did
not care for her breakfast ana smiled
To herself as She heard the farmers
wife say to the other puSSicS, Il guess
PuSSic White caught all the mice last
night and YOU two did not catch any,
from the way YOU eat"
But her revenge was complete when
later Blackic and Tabbie ran into the
barn and could rot find Il mouse, for
those that Peter and puSsie White did
not catch the night before were fright
cncd and ran away from the barn to
live.
Tabbie ard Hlackic did not make
The Mellette County pioneer. [volume] (Wood, Mellette County, S.D.) 19??-1971, 1920-11-26
A Feeling Of Security

You naturally feel secure when you
know that the medicine YOU are about to
take is absolutely pure and contains no
harmful or habit producing drugs.
Such a medicine is DIR. Kilmer's Swamp
Root, kidney, liver and bladder remedy.
The same standard of purity, strength
and excellence is maintained in every
bottle of Swamp-Root.
1t is scientifically compounded from
vegetable herbs.
1t is not a stimulant and is taken in
~teaspoonful doses.
II is not recommended for everything.
1t is natures great helper in relieving
and overcoming kidney, liver and blad-
der troubles.
a sworn statement Of purity is with
every bottle of DR.. Kilmer's Swamp
Root.
If you need a medicine. you should
have the best. On sale at all drug stores
in bottles of two sizes. medium and large.
However, if You wish first to try this
great preparation send ten cents to DR..
Kilmer & Co.. Binghamton. n. V, for a
sample bottle. When writing be sure and
mention this paper.-Adv.
The Mellette County pioneer. [volume] (Wood, Mellette County, S.D.) 19??-1971, 1920-11-26
.| H9w ItI6 ftatIt
FORKS.

TINE table fork is comparatively
modern. 1t was first introduced
in Venice by a Byzantine princess,
and it's use rapidly spread throughout
Italy. In an inventory Of the court
Of Charles V of France, dated 1879,
there is mention of silver forks; but
for some time the use Of these instru-
ments was satirized. Certain French
and Scottish converts even forbade
them as sinful. Their original form
was two-tined; the three and four
tined varieties came later.
(Copyright.>
The Mellette County pioneer. [volume] (Wood, Mellette County, S.D.) 19??-1971, 1920-11-26
FINGERS

Y AM indebted to one Of my readers
Il for the following letter, which was
sent me after some advice on the cure
for cracked nails. The letter came
some time ago, and | have saved it
to use as the season approaches when
nails and fingers split from the change
OF weather.
Says my correspondcnt-Whose
name is withheld by request-"l had
cracked fingers for nearly two years
before going 50 our family doctor.
He said the condition was due TO Il
generally Mncnic condition Of the
blood. and that this was partly due
The Mellette County pioneer. [volume] (Wood, Mellette County, S.D.) 19??-1971, 1920-11-26

to constipation. TONES for the blood
and salineS for the bowels were nee
essary i'm addition to the constant use
of olive oil on my fingers"
Olive oil, she added, had afforded
he: only temporary relief, but her
case was n most unusual one. But
this advice is excellent, and should be
followed by every woman who suffers
more or less from this unpleasant
afniction. Salines or salts need not
be used If some other laxative is used
in their place. Salts as n rule are the
most effective, though some women
cannot keep them on the stomach.
For ordinary cases, the woman
should do most Of her work wearing
rubber gloves, keeping the hands from
direct contact with dish or scrub wa
ter, especially if the water contains
bOraX or ammonia, or some such dry
ing solution. Ashes, stove polish, ETC.,
should be handled with glOved fingers.
Then the hands should be rubbed with
The Mellette County pioneer. [volume] (Wood, Mellette County, S.D.) 19??-1971, 1920-11-26
His Way.

"Thc Hon. Bascom Bunk Of your
township is an avowcd candidate for
the Legislature, isn't he?' asked the
able editor Of the Tumlinville Torch OF
Liberty and TOcSin Of the Times.
"Eh-yuhr." replied Gap Johnson OF
RumpuS Ridge. Hes the avowin'est
candidate YOU most ever seed. Why,
it's got 50 that when hey see him COM
ing the children Climb trees or scoOt
under the house to keep from being
avoWcd by him. And if he don't quit
avOWing rs men some Teller will take
Il shot ut him The first thing he knows"
Kansas City Star.
The Mellette County pioneer. [volume] (Wood, Mellette County, S.D.) 19??-1971, 1920-11-26

That love sometimes cures dis
ease is a fact that has been callcG
to the attention OF the public by &
prominent physician. Love il not,
however, the cure FOR Gil wogn1n.
Many 2 woman is nervous and
irritable, feels dragged down ana
worn cut for 40 rcc5oa that SIS
can think OF.
Doctor Iierco's Favorito Fra
scrlptl0n gives new life ind rey,
strength to weak, Woru-out,
rundown WC,nCl. "Fav0rite
Prescription" makes weak women
strong and sick women wei. Il
is now sold by all DRUGGISTS ii tic
United States il tablets IS Wei.
as liquid form.
BLAIR, NEE2.-"I think Dr.. Piorce's
Favorite Prescription q fine tonic for
girls as we'll as grown ome AIy
daughter was in an extremely nervous
condition and suffered with irrogu-
larity. Just a half bottle Of TIE pre-
scription.' cured her of both the merry
BUSINESS and other trouble AMI proved
to be an excellent tonic besides.
"Seyeral months afterwards, | wae
in a very nervous state and the hall
bottle Of Prescription that my daugh-
ter had left | took and found it just
rs efficient as in her case" - Mrs.
l.. ii. LoTHRoP, 2il 4. Lincoln Ct.
The Mellette County pioneer. [volume] (Wood, Mellette County, S.D.) 19??-1971, 1920-11-26
Swallowing His Words.

for naughtiness, started mumbling to
himself.
"What are you doing now?" asked
his mother.
use swearin'," said the youngster.
"but Use chewin' it up so God won't
hear me."-BOston Transcript.
The Mellette County pioneer. [volume] (Wood, Mellette County, S.D.) 19??-1971, 1920-11-26
Simplicity.
iNi!IlUl

olive oil or vaSclinc after the nightly
hot water ana soap washing, old loose
gloves drawn on. If the fingers are
badly cracked, and kept on all night.
This is as much to protect the bed lin
against the skin.
(COpyriGht)
The Mellette County pioneer. [volume] (Wood, Mellette County, S.D.) 19??-1971, 1920-11-26
Retort Courteous.

He was very modest, and to his
great horror was called upon to say
grace at his first dinner at the old
fashioned country house.
He %Quavered and said:
"For what we're about to receive
~er-thanks awfully." - Tit-BitS.
The Mellette County pioneer. [volume] (Wood, Mellette County, S.D.) 19??-1971, 1920-11-26
Cuticura Soothes Babv Rsshes

That itch and burn with hot baths
of Cuticura Soap followed by gentle
anointings Of Cuticura Ointment
Nothing better. purer. swecter. espe.
cially If a little of the fragrant Cuti.
cura Talcum is busted on at the fin.
fish. 25c each everywhere.-Adv.
The Mellette County pioneer. [volume] (Wood, Mellette County, S.D.) 19??-1971, 1920-11-26
Backhand Compliment.

Proud Parent-What do you think
Of the baby? They say he looks like
me
Truthful Friend-That is a tough
inheritance for the poor child to face
the future.
The Mellette County pioneer. [volume] (Wood, Mellette County, S.D.) 19??-1971, 1920-11-26
S.othino Like II.

THAT chap is Il humorous writer,
isn't he?'
"Not at all. He writes jokes for the
funny papers"
The Mellette County pioneer. [volume] (Wood, Mellette County, S.D.) 19??-1971, 1920-11-26

fun Of Pussic White AGAIN, but they
never knew how pCSSie managed TO
clear the barn in Il single night.
(Copyright)
The Mellette County pioneer. [volume] (Wood, Mellette County, S.D.) 19??-1971, 1920-11-26

Beware of the unloaded gun and the
crippled mule.
The Mellette County pioneer. [volume] (Wood, Mellette County, S.D.) 19??-1971, 1920-11-26

COIeTs CarboIiHaIVc VutrhTN TNcIEtNVs
and heals burning, itching ana torturing
skin diseases. 1t instantly stops the pain
of burns. Heals without sears. soc and C0c.
Ask your drdggist. or send 3Dc to The j.
w. Cole Co. Rockford. H.. for a pkg.AdV.
The Mellette County pioneer. [volume] (Wood, Mellette County, S.D.) 19??-1971, 1920-11-26
Wanted 10 Make Good irapreaeion.

Wanted 10 Make Good impreoeion.
Il understand YOU kissed your VIE
several times before leavinA the house
this morniug:' said the man TO his
next door ncighhor.
Yes; that, what | did" vas The
reply.
"But, l understand YOU haven't
kissed her for 4 long time before to-
day"
NO; that's 50, I haven't, but we
are about to get n divorce and | want
her to feel Kind o pleasant about it,"
Workers Statesman.
The Mellette County pioneer. [volume] (Wood, Mellette County, S.D.) 19??-1971, 1920-11-26

have q little tlattcry than a lot Of SYM
PATTY.
The Mellette County pioneer. [volume] (Wood, Mellette County, S.D.) 19??-1971, 1920-11-26

Mrs. n. Palncrson Williams Of New
Orleans in private life, but universally
known as Marguerite Clark, long n
of the leading "movie" stars, is re-
garded by many as the sWeetest girl
on the screen. This is a recent pic
ture of the little star.
The Washington herald., 1920-02-15

Of Monsieur Grandjean. one of the
leading architect constructors OF
France The building will face the
Seine with a frontage OF 10 feet and
a depth OF 800 feet. 1t will cover thir-
teen acres or an area as large as the
famous Place de la Concorde al Paris.
which faces the Hotel Criuon. where
the White House" held forth duriua
the Peace Conference.
The building will contain besides 50a
shops for producers from all over the
world who wish TO display their prod
ucts there. a luxurious club for buyers.
swimming and Turkish baths, 8 roof
garden. restaurant, lecture rooms an
Industrial theater. a press room, ad-
ministrative offices and offices for the
commercial attaches and secretaries
of all embassies and consulates.
The storerooms in the big palace will
be leased by the French government
at reasonable terms to producers and
manufacturers all over the world. who
wish to establish headquarters and dis
plays there for the benefit of world
buyers who constantly fock to Paris.
Although the plans are not even COM
pleted. requests have already been
made for over 200 reservations Amer
ican firms are well represented
amongst those who arc thus getting in
on the ground floor.
France expects 10 spend S30Oo0. on on
the building. and by so doing to secure
for herself the worlds market plaCs.
The Washington herald., 1920-02-15
Paris Structure
To Contain "WorlEs MarRet''

Paris. Feb. I'm the commercial and
Industrial era that is coming with
peace. Paris is determined to hold the
center OF the worlds stage the same
as she did during the war and the
Peace Conference.
As the first step to this end she is
rushing TO completion the plans and
preparations for the construction at
Paris OF a gigantic commercial palace
that is to be known as The woris' s
Market"
When il is completed. within the next
two years. as now planned. it will be
the largest building in the world.
Frances idea back OF the new enter
prise is to provide a meeting place for
both buyers and producers. Each will
have Offices and displays in the big
building. and they can meet there and
trade without having to chase each
other all around the greater portion
of the civilized globe.
As Paris is the great railway center
for all continental lines. not only for
those of Europe. but for those running
through to Asia and connecting up
with steamhsip lines for Africa and
the rest of the world. il is regarded
as merely logical that Paris should be
the center best adapted for a common.
universal world market.
Plans for the building are now being
rushed to completion by fifty leading
architects under the general direction
The Washington herald., 1920-02-15

business. without sentiment ths
work would be too hard.
Armour happened 10 remark one
day in the hearing Of bright boy
that one OF his greatest pleasures was
the developing Of young men.
Mr.. Armour" spoke up the youth.
you need not look any further. You
can start right here" pointing 70. him.
seh.
Now Vice President Of Ftrn-
Right there Mr.. Armour started.
Today the boy is vice president Of
Armour and Company. and Ar
mour's right-hand man. Robert J.
Dunham, director In Chicago bank
ing and business enterprises-zu
at 90.
ITO get the right kind Of men.
we begin early" said Armour. We
are more particular about the hir-
ing of Office boys than about any
other thing connected with the or
ganizstion. for the once boys OF
today will become, our department
managers tomorrow. We practi-
cally never go outside for a high
priced man and the young man
who starts with us at the bottom
can hope to rise TO the top"
The Washington herald., 1920-02-15
Chief Guard at White House
Is Expert Crank Detector

Il want to see the President have
an important message for him. know
how To-
Just a moment" said Detective
Sergenat Clarence L. Dalrymple.
chief guard at the White House. The
President is not able to see you at
present. His secretary will attend to
you"
= ~ret rice man, the "secre-
fa.-. 49, ~ ed the wild-eyed per-
SD la ~, cutive offices of the
. .--ass T.. card his tale and had
i-u sew ashington Asylum Hos
1.gal 'g- s.1 observation
-sz.r-- r.. is just that way. He is
re sJu. -tesy. whether he may
20 de- r- -- cranks or diplomats.
LIS uus-H,-- sauveness ever comes
% -1s ru-,
-7 ris enty five years experience
a. a white House guard DalrympIe
has intercepted thousands of cranks,
many of the dangerous type, desper-
ately bent on seeing the President.
"Cranks come in waves" Dalrym-
pie said last night. During the
war a lot of people with disordered
minds tried to get the Presidents
ear. to tell him Of a sure way to-
win the war
After the war. a flock of cranks
with crazy ideas on reconstruction
kept us busy. Just now there are
many people who are worried about
the Presidents illness and insist on
sending him sure cures. from thought
healers down to pills and liniments.
Dalrymple is familiar figure to
many national and international
personages, nd was known inti-
mately h y sinley, Roosevelt and
'~C O.. -r-s.s IT Wilson now calls
tEs .iitl tr'- d by his established
rl-<.aUrt al" but Dalrymple
hszlt 'a. > gressed to the stage
WEsrp ne re his boss Woody"
ono rr rymple's remarkable
t~zus is O.. Guilty for remember
1EE @arss faces. He cultivated
-his EsNI. III, now IL has become
a great 4 r. his work.
The Washington herald., 1920-02-15
|, 200 ATTEND CLASSES
AT BAPTIST CHURCH

Daily attendance is increasing at
the school for Christian workers con-
Quoted by the District of Columbia
Association of Baptist Churches at
Calvary Baptist Church, Eighth and
II streets northwest Twelve hun
dred persons attended Wednesdays
classes.
The present tendency among
churches in Washington and the ma
tion is towards federation, but a
strong note Of denominationalism was
struck last night by Dr., Edwin M.
Poteat. a noted Baptist.
Tie speake: spoke of the large sums
that have recently been raised by his
denomination and stated that the sue
cess of the campaign for funds was
due to the awakening of the Baptist
people to their opportunity.
The classes and lectures will con-
tinue through tomorrow. The classes
begin at 3:15 p. m. and extend through
six forty-five minute periods until
$50. when the lecture is held. DR..
William A. Hill will speak tonight on
The Supreme Call" The closing lee.
ture will be given tomorrow night by
DR.. William z. Chalmers, the, subject
teins After This School whatr'
The Washington herald., 1920-02-15
CARE NEEDED KEEP
HAIR IN CONDITION

BY reason OF the fact that the
roots Of the hair are among the
most delicate organs in the BODY.
beauty experts state that the scalp
should be treated with extreme
care. Hair should be brushed
thoroughly. but not violently.
Only small strand Of hair should
he combed at a time. This should
be held in the fingers Of one hand.
close to the roots. while IL il
combed. The combinE movement
should be one slow. long stroke az
ter another. to the ends OF the hair.
4 heavy. ropy appearance will re-
suit IL hair H. combed and bruSfeI
in too thick strands. In the ideal
condition. with each hair standing
out individually. il forms a fiuhy
frame for the face.
IL is imperative for healthy hair.
that 1t be brushed thoroughly c.l,n
night. to remove the dust. and livcn
circulation. An easy way to insure
a long enough period of brushin=.
is 20 set a dcinit" number -
strokes. such a. 100 strokes each
night.
II the hair Is dry and brittle, {
should he treated with NS>'li "r
olive oil. r'Irh i i-:r H.. a'u a
small quantities. each night for =
period OF eight or t'n Gay. "a
doing this. care must he observed %
prevent the oil from getting int" c rn
hair itself. At the end of the period
of treatment the hair should b.
shampooed. rinSed and dried in IN"
open air and sunlight.
For a home shampoo the sat"s'
way to rinse the hair is with q
spray attached to the faucet of t''
bathtub. with the spray. water ms e.
4 be gradually changed from hot, "a
warm. and finally TO very cold.
The Washington herald., 1920-02-15
MANY RETURN
CENSUS SLIPS
Supervisor Mattingly Says
D. c. Population Will Be
Announced This Week.

Residents who hrd not been seen
by a census enumerator are respond
ing to the appeal sent out a FEW
days ago by the Chamber of Com
merce. the Board of Trade and the
Merchants and Manufacturers As
sociation. More than a thousand
slips have been returned since the
last portfolio was turned in last
Wednesday. As far as possible.
these returns will be included in the
announcement OF the population.
we are leaving no stone un-
turned. and residents of the District
may be assured that every man,
woman and child who belongs here
will be counted" said Robert f.
Mattingly. District supervisor. yes
terday. Letters were sent yesterday
to the managers of all hotels and
large apartment houses asking their
cooperation.
As yet Washington and Cincinnati
are the only cities with complete re-
turns, but census officials stated that
three or four cities. including Chi
cago and New York, are about COM
plete. Announcement OF the popu-
lation of Washington and Cincinnati
will probably be delayed until the
end of the week The unoffcial
opinion of oficials is that the census
will give the capital a population
OF about 100000.
The Washington herald., 1920-02-15
HOUSEHOLD HINTS
BY LEARNED WOMEN

IL we assume that experience is the
only teacher we can amend il and
admit that the experience of others
will help Us to learn, too.
At the Public Library they have a
host Of the most interesting books
campiied by persons making life
work of solving just the problems
that confront every housewife. Have
you read the following?
Marketing and housework manual
by S. DorehanL Contains good mar
keting charts. menu making. and
comparative food values. 4 good gen
eral work for the housekeeper.
Successful canning and preserving.
BY Ola Powell An invaluable work.
Covers every phase Of food preserva-
jtion. Profusely illustrated. No house
keeper can afford to be without ii.
Thrift in the household by ID. NJ.
Hughes. A thorough work on the sub
Iject. Considers thrift from all angles.
what it is and what il is not.
Adventures in thrift by A. $. Rich
ardson. Presented in fiction form. de-
ilightfully told. Shows the uuinitiated
how TO make use Of the many agen-
icies for cutting living cost such as
Housewives Cooperative League. etc.
Complete housekeeper by Emil
Holt. An encyclopedia Of the house
hotd. Covers every phase of household
management from cellar 10 Garret as
well as the back yard and garden.
lContains simple home remedies and
suggestions for the care OF the sick
| The home and its management by
NJ II. Kittredge. A very practical
and general treatment of the sub
ject. Contains good inexpensive cook
ing recipes.