davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1920-01-17


THEY seems 10 be a Few people left
l in the L. y. 6hat still thinks we
wasn't justified OF something in de-
clarinE war on Germany. but / guess
these birds would feel different II
they stopped TO think that it was a
German that invented the telephone
and II I.ouvain and the sinking of the
Louisiana was a crime what about the
invention Of the telephone witch
comes from the Greek words tele,
meaning far off. and phone. meaning
sound. ard maybe its on acct Of me
liveing IN Greenwich. witch isn't far
off from the Sound. why maybe that is
why the telephone service IS So
we'll you know.
the telephone was invented by q Ger
man why you can't help but believe
the rest about them for lnstants IN
venting tear gas and etc but not only
that but IL also shows how VS. de-
uocracv they .lras when they invented
something that nobody only the leis-
ure class can use because for inst
Too Expensive.
and you couldn't never AFFORD u
even II we only figured our time at
10 cts. per hr- witch nobody gets as
little as that now days only the presi-
dent Of Harvard college or q soldier
CT something, because FOR lnstants II
I am out here in Greenwich and want
70 talk to somebody in n Y city why
ii wouldn't only cost me about $500
dollars 70 so down there and see them
where II teiephoued IL would be $50
cents for the call and days 70 put
II through and II ] worked on s hr
basis at 10 cts per hr- why that would
be a total of $3.50 for the 2 days that
il took to put the telephone cal
through where I could go down ana
see them and get back in hrs. or
some such figure
But in the case OF the leisure class
its different as the only real work
they have 10 do the whole year
round Is TO make out their income
tax blanks which only takes 8 months
10 figure out how they can beat the
government and II il wasn't for tha
telephone they wouldn't know what
10 do with the rest Of their time.
where as now when they get tired Of
poker and bridge and etc and have
got a lev days lett on thelr nana WY
an as t-ey half 70 do 70 xiii couple
days = Try and get SOMEBODY on the
telephone =
Substitute for the saloon
But I don't want my genial readers
20 think this crabhy article means
thar I don't hold no brief for the teie-
phone company on the other hand
il il wasn't for a German invenung
the telephone why they wouldn't Of
no American invented the telephone
directory witch is the greatest insu-
tuition we got left here from a amuse-
pent point Of view since the saloon
was wiped out and the purpose Of
This letter is 70 point out the advan-
taEes OF haveing a telephone direc- [
tory il the home for birds that can't
afford 20 subscribe TO the public IL
hrary and etc
The TELEPHONE directory has never
been gave the credit to deserves and
personly have got I regret in life
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1920-01-17
By MISS HELEN ROWLAND

her. And 81 Isn't as the theorists
think. a matter OF vitality and radl-
ance; because perfectly r-'li
den can ruffle a mans feelings IKE
blustery wind. and IS usually apout
as fascinating as pound OF pota-
Dempsey W. VIM. :. Hart.
And even Jack Dempsey couldn't
win against william s. "0rf
timentaI battle" interpolated the
Bachelor. m0desrly-
And It has nothing TO do with
brains, or genius or nrilIancE- or
Wit. or intelligence
Il knew itt~ exclaimed the Bach
Tor. with sudden conviction ITS
vanity
What
eEgotism. conceu. apiomb. savior
faire. Misrepresentation Anybody
who thinks a lot OF himself CO.
ways make the rest OF the world
Only temporarily-n0 permanent
" objected the Widow Vanity and
beauty are merely good self adver-
tisemeuts. And when We find they
have deceived us. and that me mag
netism isn't there, we are always nor
ribly disappointed. It's sometime
far deeper and more mysterious than
that. 1rr. Waafharhv. It's an appeal
20 the IMAGINATION
Appeal 10 ImnEination-
"Ah. 7 see,~ murmured che Bache-
Tor. TITS what makes women elope
with their chauffeurs. and what
makes widows. and trained nurses.
and soldiers, and actresses so fasci-
mating. They may not all have ula~-
uetism. but all Of them appeal 20 the
Imagination
-Yes." agreed the Widow. with a
smile OF understanding. they have a
running start. But real magnetism,
real charm, IS more powerful than a
uniform or a row Of footlishts- IL IS
a secret power. a reserve force that
you can't see or define. but can sim
ply feel It's mental electricity
still" suggested the Bacheior. -if
the average girl would be a little less
frank in her ways. and he o.
zion. and her gowns. she MIGHT an-
peal more to our imaginations-aud
our curiosity. mightn't sheZr
@Of course sighed the Widow.
-It'S always the quiet little thing.
sWuthed in draperirs. who sits in
n corner ant uses h-r
draws all the men 70 her. And
It's never the life n re r--s.
hut the quiet. reserved man. with
the devoted. rffcrrfve --~r---.
who captures the belle Of she eve
ming
~oh. I don't know objected the
Bachelor I never see TOu sitting
off in a corner and
"EeF' repeated the Widow. opening
her eyes -Oh. I'm a widow, Ir.
Weatherby. I have q running start
Men can always imagine things about
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1920-01-17
MoUie Men Boost Bill For
2-Cent And I5-Cent Coins

Washington. D. C.. Jan. i7.-Beiisv-
ing that 2-cent and lucent coins are
needed. the national association Of
the motion picture Industry has sue
ceeded in having two bills introduced
in congress Since the revenue tax
on admissions went into effect the
necessity for making change AZ the
box office has occastoned an appre-
cisbla delay
Other industries 20 be benefited viii
be newspapers. telephone and tele-
graph companies, soda fountains and
candy stores and transportation lines.
Motion picture men want a 15-cent
coin because 10 cents is rapidly be-
coming the standard price of admis-
sion.
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1920-01-17


kids could break
witch is that 7 didn't keep all the
telephone directorys witch was ever
gave 70 ne as IL would save me from
buying a cyclOpedia witch costs SIS
per case as opposed 70 a telephone
directory that don't cost nothing II
you ever get u and has got or 9
times as many names In il and besides
that the names in the cyclopedia is
80 percent dead compared 10 the
names telephone directory witch IS
only so percent dead when you try
ana call them up.
Only Has Old Ones.
I also wished I could bring 18th q
modern vol l. prove my assertions
but unfortunately the only telephone
books 7 got in the house is the latest
one from Greenwich where you all
ready know the number Of the
grocery store and butcher shop and
taxi cab Co. and Mr.. Quan who lones
you money and also the y. Y. city tel
ephone Directly Of May 2. 1918, and
4 suppose II I u here q couple more
years they viii give me a October
book Of 1913 and keep ne up 10 date
So viii half TO prove my point II
any by QuOteing from the Y y city
directory OF May ?, 1913, as follows as
they say
IN the first place It says that use
full iuforma alton can be found on
page Il. So you turn to page II and
the first thing that strikes you in
the eyeball is a ad witch says we sell
artificial limbs that fit Wen sup
pose that some morning you was 10
wake Up and have a craFeing- for q
artificial limb that fit you and you
didn't know how 10 90 about il 10 get
one and they wasn't no telephone
directory in the home, why where
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1920-01-17

the skee. and ont OF the window he
jumped
well. now he's gone. we can 90 on
with cur game said Uncle WigEily,
when the broken window OK Of which
the Skee had jumped had been COW
cred with a blanket. and the front
door closed So the checkers were
picked ID. the board Strengthened out,
and Uncle Wiggily and Grandpa
Goosey played their game SO this
teaches Us It is a good thing 70 know
about Scotch checkers And II the
cocoauut cake doesn't Try to crawl
out Of the oven and hide away from
the ice puddln- in the ice hox. III ;~il
you next about Uncle WigEily and
the egg beaten
(Copyright. 1890. by the Mcclure
Newspaper Syndicate.)
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1920-01-17

A MOTHER lucky day, according 70
/ n ast-oIogy Uranus. Mercury, the
sun and Jupiter are all in benefic
aspect Saturn. alone. frowns-
II is a time for initiative Of every
sort, whether in the launching OF
great enterprises or the search for a
humble position.
During this configuration plans T..
ventures that viii be OF lasting sue
cess should be made and progressive
ideas entertained
Uranus is IN place supposed 20
encourage sympathy and understand
ing between men and women. This
sway VIII be most beneficial in bust
ness and politics.
The stars seem TO promise that the
ratification OF the suffrage amend
ment will give the vote to all women
in the nation before the first month
OF spring-
Warning is given that when wome-
are full citizens they should be reck-
oned with seriously, for &c is prophe-
sled that they will chooc the next
president Of the United States by
uniting without regard 10 party on a
favorite candidate.
There is a good sign for commerce
and trade Merchants should find
this a most favorable time.
Public improvements OF every sort
are subject 10 a direction that seems
TO indicate delays. but final achieve
ment that is extraordinary.
Building comes under a direction Of
the stars making Tor artistic effect
and beautiful surroundings
A new regard for landscape garden
ing viii mark the coming summer. IL
is prognosticated. and many women
VIII engage in the profession in this
country.
Again attention is called 20 reac-
tionary tendencies which will affect
not only political parties but social
customs
1Iodesty. reticeuce and the virtues
esteemed IN the Victorian era viii
gain popularity and even become fads
in the year 1929. the sesrs declare
Persons whose birthdate il Is only
have worries in the coming year. but
they viii prosper II they avoid specu-
fation-
Children born on this day may be
rather inclined 10 be self willed and
opinionated, but they are likely TO be
talented and clever-Copyrigh 1920.
BY the Mcclure Newspaper Syndicate.
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1920-01-17

and the freight on the otueI fi0o Av-
possession Of her glinting hair
Don't be facstious,' she begged
This is serious. III give you two
more guesses-
Most Absorbing Secret
ION well. Il I must be serious,
comnlained the Bachelor. the most
absorbing secret in the world IS the
secret Of happiness; and the mos
fascinating secret Is the secret OF
success. And then. there's the secre Z
OF eternal youth. and the secret OF
the sphinx and
an vrong,~ interrupted the Wild
nv with z wave Of her hand Lots
Of people have discovered the ansW er
70 the first two-and there IS no an
and the Don't Worry club and the
mental scientists all know the secret
Of happiness know il myself. And
once you KNOW q secret il isn't las
cinatinE any morea And as Tor the
secret OF success. It's still easier 10
solve. A measure OF hard work. a
world Of faith IN yourself and q cash
Of luck. But the GREATEST secret
in the world is something that every
body longs % know-and nobody has
ever vet succeeded IN guessing
Either you've GOT it"
Il haven't protested the Bache-
Tor. frivolously. I haven't had il this
AFTERNOON What is III!
ais sJAGNETIsMs- announced
the widow. impreasively- "and
either you have it-or you haven't
fl And nobody in the world
knows what IL is nor where Il
comes from. nor what It's CON-
posed or
7 dor" declared the Bachelor. IN
blushingly. It's composed OF about a
hundred and twenty rounds OF mink
and white frivollty and two pounds
OF rlitterinz hair. and
at Nsu't a matter OF beauty" pro-
ceeded the Widow, ignoring the per-
sonal application I've seen rranv a
Venus sitting out half her dances
while some snub- nosed, freckle-faced
thing had 20 split the EXTRAS
times 70 satisfy all the men around
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1920-01-17

she sat curled up
amongst the multi
colored pillows in
a C orn er OF the
window seat
What is this-a
Fabu 50" he de-
NJ a 2 d e d. suspi-
ciously. "or are We
playing charades p
The greatest Sc
cret in the world ?
Why woman 8
real o-iuion Of her
husband"
The Widow shook
her head until the
afternoon sunlight
ION the o Il e side
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1920-01-17

shock, you never looked at a maga-
zine OF went 70 a dinner but what
people we're telling OF the horrors or
she'll shock
And in both cases you got what you
see II you don't agree with me- Then
think 30 over some more and tell ne
IL you don't think the Eiuly coutrari-
ness OF life Is a pretty good thing 10
laugh at
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1920-01-17

GsIITHAT is the greatest secret in
w the worldz' inquired the
Widow. impulsively.
The R4chelrr glanced VI 20 where
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1920-01-17
Seen Through The Widows Lorgnette;
Magnetism Greatest Secret In World
Because Nobody KnOtUs Just What 1t Is

me-that have past or q history
or q broken heart Really. when YOU
think how easy be IS 70 start the mas-
culine Imagination working, you Wc1-
der why every woman can't be maE-
uetfc But magnetism like common
sense and dim1les. seems 70 be rtft
Of the high gods 20 the rare few
whom they love It may be stimulated.
I hut it cant be cultivated, or acquired.
or pasted on Its Ike second
says It's Hypuotism-
"TtE hypuotism, That's what e is-f
declared the Bachelor. emphatically.
. and. IL rhe gods only knew il. giving
magnetism TO red-haired widow IS
carving Goals 10 NeWcastle-'
Thank youf" returned the Widow
airily. Then giving magnetismr 70 an
eligible bachelor must be-
Carrying soap 20 Russia groaned
the Bachelor. bitterly. He doesn't
know what 90 do with IT,"
1T MUST make life complicated for
YOU commiserated the Widow.
But you haven't yet told me what
10 is said the Bachelor. hastily
. changing the topic
II can't" admitted the widow.
and YETI she added gazing
dreamfly out OF the window. sits
what makes you think Of Ear-
dcux. and moonlight. ana fnfr1~
stories, and Prince ChurminE.
when you listen 70 mans
volee-
And what makes you hear music
and smell vioiets. and dream OF Ven
| Ice and young love. when you look
into woman's eyes" added the
Bachelor, gazing dreamily into the
fire.
-The secret OF the aEes-the great
est secret in the world-' murmured
the widow and we haven't even
guessed it,"
WIDOW-CIslIs.
A nan IS as old as he feels-after
a good dinner and a woman Is as old
as she lcoks-after a Trash marcel
and a face massage
The distance 70 the end Of the rain
bow looks hundred years ahead. &C
90, but at 30 It looks just 20 years
back
A man IS chiefly interested IN
the beginning OF q love affairs
but woman always wants u
take a peep nj the last CHAPTER
and see how Il Is going to turn
OUT before she can work m any
vital enthusiasm over IL
A bride trsmbles when her husband
meets the woman he used 10 love
but seasoned wife has no fears OF
perturbatious until ne meets one
whom he has not yet loved.
No mater how many chins a woman
may have. she Is not actually passe
until she begins 20 feel f1attered a. a
boys sentimental impertlnsnce-
Copyright. 1920 By the Wheeler Syn
dicate- Inc
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1920-01-17

BY the acceptance of her applisa
tion for admission as a student f3r
the bar Mrs. Gwyneph ". Thomson.
Great Britain.
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1920-01-17

THE young lady across the way says
she saw in the paper that a silver
dollar IS now worth SLOT and the next
time she buys something that costs a
dollar she mustn't forget 70 wait for
her change.
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1920-01-17

Lady Aston. who recently took hei
seat as member OF the British h0usi
OF commons. will have at her disposal
a smoking room. tea and dining room
a library and boulder.
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1920-01-17
People Get What They Are Looking For;
1t May Be Unhappmess; Can Be Pleasure

In World of JOY and Sunshine One Is Bound Get His Share a It
Sooner or Later; Look on the Bright Side: Don't Be
MARTYR to Pain or Affie6on
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1920-01-17

No mater how many Chins q woman
may have she Is not actually uasgs
until she begins 20 feel flattered a. a
boys sentimental impertlnence.-
Copyright. 1920. By the Wheeler Syn
dicate. Inc.
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1920-01-17

A man IS chiefly interested IN
the beginning OF a love afEalrs
but a woman always wants to
take n peep NJ the last chapter
and see how Il Is going to turn
OUT before she can work M any
vital enthusiasm over IT.
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1920-01-17

A bride trsmbles when her husband
meets the woman he used 70 love
but q seasoned wife has no fears OF
peTturbations until he meets one
whom he has not yet loved.
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1920-01-17

The distance TO the end Of the rain
how looks a hundred years ahead. At
20; but at 30 II looks just 20 years
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1920-01-17

AlDOM-llsAea
A nan IS as old as he feeIs-aftei
a good dinner: and a woman e As Cd
as she lcoks-after a Trash rnarcei
and a face massage.
Montgomery County sentinel. [volume] (Rockville, Md.) 1855-1974, 1920-01-16
GENTILITY IN HUMBLE GARB
Rags and Tatters Proudly Worn by
the Famous Experimenters at
Brook Farm.

"Arcadians though we were" wrote
Hawthorne of the Brooks farm expert
ment, "our costume bore no resem-
blance t. the berlbbOned doublets, silk
breaches and stockings, and slippers
fastened with artificial roses that dis
tinguished the pastoral people Of po'
etry and the stage. In outward show,
humbly concede, we looked rath-
er like a gang of beggars, or bandittI,
than either a company Of honest labor
Ing men or a conclave Of philosophers.
Whatever might be our points of diff
ference, we all of us seemed to have
come to Blithedale with the one thrifty
Did clothes. Such garments as had an
airing whenever we strobe afleld
Coats with high collars and with no
rollars; broad-skirted or swallowtallcd,
and with the waist at every point be-
tween the hip and armplt; pantaloons
Of n dozen successive epOchs, and
greatly defaced at the knees by the
humiliations Of the wearer before his
ady-love; In short, we were living
spitome of defunct fashions, and the
very raggedest presentment of men
who had seen better days. 1t was gen.
llity In tatters. We might have been
sworn comrades to Falstaff's ragged
regiment. Little skill as we boosted
N other points Of husbandry, every
mothers son of us would have served
admirably to stick up for scare
crow"
Montgomery County sentinel. [volume] (Rockville, Md.) 1855-1974, 1920-01-16
MEXICAN IDEA OF CREATION
Maya-ouIche Scripture Resembles In
Marked Degree That Handed
Down by Other Peoples.

The true indigenous civilization Of
Mexico-the Maya-Quiche, so named
from Its foremost peoples, still nu-
merous and robust--has its authentic
scripture in the Quiche tongue, the
PopOl Vuh, unearthed by Padre Kline
nez about 1875, and printed in full,
with an interleaved French translation
by the Able Basseurde Bourbourg in
1865, according to an article by Charles
Johnston, In the Atlantic monthly.
The scriptures cosmogony begins
with universal night-what the San
skirt scriptures call the night Of
Brahma-when darkness was upon the
waters. Then follows the develop
ment Of worlds, first formed like thin
cloud-wreaths In the abyss, and grad
under the formative will of "the
Creator, the Moulter Heart of the
Heavens, Heart of the Earth" Then
beasts and birds are formed. But,
although they have voices, they have
no articulate speech; they can not In
woke their Creator, or call upon the
Heart Of Heavens in prayer.
Therefore the Divine Powers set
themselves to make man, who can
pray and praise the Creator, SO the
Divine Powers may receive alteration
from their handiwork. Two races are
made only to fail; men formed of
wet clay, who melt and dissolve, and
the manikins, whose hearts are hard
and who can not worship. At last
race, intelligent, reverent, full Of a
penetrating wisdom that sees all things
In the heavens as well as on earth, is
brought into being. This perfect race
renders praise and glory to the Creator.
Montgomery County sentinel. [volume] (Rockville, Md.) 1855-1974, 1920-01-16
FEAST WORTHY OF THE NAME
Montenegrlns Put Up Elaborate Spread
as Natural Part Of the Wed-
ding Ceremony.

The feasts prepared by Monteneg-
rims. when weddings are celebrated,
overshadOw the most elaborate affairs
along that line In America, says Ed
ma Worthley Underwood, in a transla-
ton of a story, "Furor nlyricus," by
A. Won Vestendorf. Two serving maids
and the head of the house enter with
huge, four-cornered bottles. One little
drink and dried fig open the meal.
This Is custom to Danish the taste
of cigarets, which are always in evil
dence. The heavy, thick, ink-black
wine Of LISA is then poured, and the
diners choose their favor1te morsels
from plates, after which sugared eggs
are passed around. This is just the
beginning of the banquet, which Is
followed by mineStra, baked macaroni,
with hashee made from the entrails
of young lambs, fowl roasted In sugar,
small barboni baked In oil, baked ink
fish with citron, pullets cooked with
fresh vegetables, and beef served on
huge platters. Wine flows In abund-
ance, and boisterous laughter and loud
talking prevail. The banquet is closed
with a special dish, after champagne
has been served. A roast lamb Is
brought in on a wooden platter. and
put near the lower end of the large
table. With a lordly gesture the mas
ter Of ceremonies steps forward, and
with a large knife, ground MS thin as
a hair, chops the lamb into four
pieces with two strokes. The women
continue to eat cakes and fruit, but
the men spend the remainder Of the
time drinking.
Montgomery County sentinel. [volume] (Rockville, Md.) 1855-1974, 1920-01-16
SPEED OF EPIDEMIC VARIES
Diseases Travel According to the
Modes Of Transportation In the
Regions AFFLICTED.

The speed at which an epidemic
whether 1t be Of influenza or any 9TH
er infectious disease-spreads de-
ponds upon the rapidity Of the usual
means Of transportation. In his presi-
Dental address at the congress of
American Physicians and Surgeons,
DR.. Simon Flexner said:
"In eastern Russia and Turkestan
Influenza spreads with the pace of a
caravan, In Europe and America with
the speed Of an express train, and in
the world at large with the rapidlty
Of an ocean liner; and If one project
forward the outcome Of the means Of
intercommunication of the near future
we may predict that the next pan
demic, should one arise, will extend
with the swiftness of the airship.
Moreover, not only is this rate of
spread determined by the nature of
the transportation facilities Of the re-
gion or the era, but towns and vii
lagos, mainland and island, are In
vaded early or late or preserved en-
irely from attack according as they
lie within or without the avenues of
approach or are protected by inacces-
sibility, as In instances of remote
mountain settlements and Of islands
distant from the ocean lanes or frozen
In during winter periods"
Montgomery County sentinel. [volume] (Rockville, Md.) 1855-1974, 1920-01-16

CecIy, duchess of York, who lived
toward the end Of the sixteenth CEN
fury, was doomed to witness in her
family more appalling calamitles than
probably are found in the history of
any other individual. Twenty-slx Of
her closest relatives, through whom
she hoped to inherit the throne Of Eng
land, were killed in battle, poisoned or
murdered during her lifetime. Her
father was that rash and powerful
nobleman, Ralph Neville, earl of West
moreland. She was the youngest Of
twenty-one children, and on becoming
the wife of Richard Plantagenet, duke
Of York, her family exerted all their
influence to place her on the throne Of
England. After series of splendid
achievements, unparalleled in history,
the whole family of Neyilles was
swept away long before Cecily had de-
scended In sorrow to her grave.