The Hope pioneer. [volume] (Hope, N.D.) 1882-1964, 1920-09-09

like to be, but that Is all"
"You are a hideous old fool" I said,
"but l think l can handle you, and l
give you warming"
II am going to be quite friendly"
said Jed.
"You flatter Yourself" I said.
swell, anyway" he said, I'm friend
ly."
He proved to be so. The life of the
house went placidly from day to day.
Isobel, with a sense of our posturing
toward each other, made hooking ges-
lures Of affection which shocked her
mother. She particularly delighted to
demonstrate, when Jed was serving
dinner. l thought she would end by
getting me shot in the back, but Jed
had rated me finally as u%nimportant,
which did my egotism no good. For
such a rascal to discard me, formally
betrothed as l was to 1sobel. in his
scandalous pursuits of that beautiful
girl, was preposterous.
If Mrs. Sidney had known that I was
idiotically in love with Isobel, she
would not have sought relief from her
distress by the arrangement which
made me her daughters protective
faance. The only thing l could take
credit for in this absurd situation was
that Mrs. Sidney vas not allowed to
know the state of my feelings.
1 was as sensible as a corrupting ro-
manticism would permit me to be. I
knew that any affection l might place
In this fashion was a real and serious
emotional vice, which if not controlled
might lead to unhappi1ess. That con-
sciousness had steadied me, but it had
not delivered me.
Isobel walked brightly through the
old house Of tragedy-as surely it was,
however hidden the tragedy. She was
the CLINT Of sunshine in the aisles Of
the dark woods, the odor of roses
against the wall. She had the charm
Of the hollyhocks, the freshness Of the
hepatica in the spring. the beauty Of
the wild rose in June.
If l showed my feeling more than
a liver sausage shows q soul, I hope I
may be punished. What l thought Of
Isobel was my own affair, so long as
l kept it strictly my own affair.
I took myself in hand with as much
energy and promptness as I could, fol-
lowing the announcement Of our en-
gagement. I did not want to confess
myself a fool. 1 did not intend to do
so If I could help 1t.
I overdid it. I became ~disagreeable.
I kept as much out of Isobel's presence
as possible. I never willingly was
alone with her. I did my best to avoid
meeting her or speaking to her. Isobel
met the situation with her natural
%frankness after l had been giving this
demonstration Of myself for some time.
Doctor" she said, "this household
necessarily imposes friendships upon
the people in 1t. l wonder If we could
not be a little more agreeable to each
other"
l did not know what to say. I hoped
not to be a %hypocrite, and l did not
want to be absurd.
II shall be glad to be as agreeable
as I ca1." I said after some mental
SSOIlClluSs 1 "dut 10 Uc, DuC i 8m
so awkward"
II wantt to be, too" said Isobel land
1t we both want to be, we shall not
have to glover at each other every
time we meet. Even mother does not
require 1t and father would detest H."
Without saying anything more, she
made me see that I had used a cheap
device to escape the consequences of
a foolish affection. The girl in a very
friendly fashion had shown me that
my avoidance Of her was marked, cool
and unreasonable. 1t was wholly rea-
sonable from my poor standpoint, but
from no other.
I saw that I was meeting my difficult
ty by running away from it, and I not
only did not like the timidity of escape
in this fashion, but furthermore, l did
not like the opinion Isobel formed Of
me because of it. I had to face the
music, and after that l did. 1t ought
not to have astonished me that l felt
better Instantly. knew that a cow
ard only increased his troubles.
l imagine II I had not seemed such
a professional stick, such a thing aloof
from human emotions, Isobel would
have been merely friendly and kind.
AS 1t was she was tantalizing. She
liked me we'll enough. but that meant
very little. If she did not drive, ride,
walk or play tennis with me, she had
a choice Of the servants. 1t was l or
nothing.
I was with Mr.. Sidney a number Of
hours every day. They varied, some
times seven or eight q day in different
periods. sometimes three or four. Very
little Of this time was occupied in pro-
fessional duty. Life at Hartley house
would have been intolerably lonesome
If l had been there merely as q prac-
titioner. And therefore I welcomed a
routine that was outside my profess
sion. Mr.. Sidney had a d~elicacy Of
perception which told him when at
tention upon eve So amiable an in
valid might be drawing upon the phys
zeal reserve of the people waiting upon
him or being with him. He always