South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1920-01-11

body IN this burg call everybody else
by their Christian name 10 their
face Immediately following an intro
ductione
Non ComprcDez Nous.
r. ID. @. writes-"Your picture Of
Mine Host Blackburne as he ap-
peared New Years eve is recognize
bic. 1 am curious 10 know what be-
came OF the candles ne had on"
The American Library association
declares that young girls are no
| longer reading Laura Jean LAbbey.
/ but better literature But Laura
Jean can never be disposed Of By
! any such girlcott as that The serv-
ant girls remain loyal and she can
carry on just the same.
The Germans stole $4,000 dogs
while in France and now France is
demanding their return. The dog
I that passes through a German saus-
age mill never returns. Not even
an echo Of his bark breaks the eter-
nal silence into which ne has raded
News print paper in the New York
open market reached 10 cents a
pound a few days ago The Amerl-
can breakfast paper is threatening
10 break into the egg bacon and
/ butter class.
If YOU marry this year have the
/ ceremony conducted by a preacher.
unless the old man is coming fast
| with d shotgun and the justice OF
me peace is handy
one of the most pleasing notions
of politics j. that which alludes to
an assemblage of democrats as "a
Love Feast"
one of our ministers has rendered
us an offer by which we are to have
his pulpit some sunday and in re-
/ turn ouers To get out the Misha-
waka section of The NeWs-Times the
/ following day We don't question
our ability 20 entertain in the pulpit,
but have our doubts about the broth
/ Cr's adaptability for our jon. our
printers have an exquisite sense OF
/ the eternal fitness of things. and just
at present are in no mood 70
iugsle with endless pages of saliva
tion.
The January white sales are be
/ ginning. Formerly. white sales inter
ested only those of the gentler sex.
but now they have universal APP
peal since all neither mysteries have
Ions since been revealed.
Germany is either conducting ex-
lpensive propaganda i'm America
which she can't afford or there arc
some big fools i'm this country" de
clares "a New York lawyer. IT must
Doc the latter Why should Germany
pay FOR what may be had among the
Doneheads gratis
With Johnnie SCHNEIDER. president,
land Charlie Bingham. vice president
of the Miami Country club. we anti
lcipatc tina, shares in the institution
will soon become so valuable that
none of MS will care TO sell even al
Ia hefty premium.
We do not know exactly how the
census taking is progressing i'm Mish-
luNaka. but our bet is that every dan
there are more noses powdered than
counted
FIFTY tcd~ we're taken iu the
Milwaukee raid. We can't under
stand il unless thc officers arc lazy
WHY Berger got et0O0 votes there
Tho supreme court is better
nudge of beer than We thought il
Twas Intelligent discrimination was
bound Co condemn the vile 2.75 stuff
The spirit" of London husband
told the wife that there was smok
ing in heaven also. % earthly con
Editions continue as they arc for
generation. heaven will have TO of
for smoking. moving picture show
and dinner dances To- secure immi
STATION from this neck Of tho uni
verse.
q You observe. too. that goo,
many OF the boys arc getting 50 they
= can walk without lifting one foot 3,
much higher than the other. with tn,
q old brass foot rail receding furthe
into the lurid and fragrant past.
Keep your nose on straight. UnCl,
sam is counting IT,
The Chicago News says if the re
port that the cost OF living is com
ing down that il viii be a fine thiul
for the survivors. More vittles NOR
pants and a heightened shirt tail
That prospect ought 90 gild the hori
2on of hope.
The moor man who steals an auto
mobile lacks intelligence. He vii
know what stern experience is whel
o.. h.-4 40 f.l