Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1920-06-06
real BASIS OF welded
love IS UNDERSTANDING
Beatrice Fairfax Describes tho One
Quality That InSnrcs Happi-
ness Of Couples.
ASKS WHAT WOMAN GRAVES
Knowing All and Forgiving All
Essentials Not Lacking Where
Husband and Wife Study Motives
Rather Than Outward Show.
ny nEArnIcE I.AInrAX.


ny BEATRICE FAIRFAX.
is there any single quality which,
above all Others, wins mems love?
What is it which men care for most
put this question to three men,
And each answered me after his own
fashion. Personality dictated some
part of each mans viewpoint; eN-
pericncc did the res.
Said the married man: 'Sympa-
thetic understanding"
Said the bachelor: Good sports
Said the widower: Charm"
Each answer held one phase OF
the reality: but !, seems 20 me that
the facts OF the full truth.
The man In whose soul there is
still imprinted the picture of one
wants little OF any other woman.
With the feeling that his emotional
life Is done Cor End finished. lustin {
still gropes for the human magnetism
which will call him from his dreams
and force him - live his If" AGAIN
as other men live it.
II needs the magic OF charm >
waken HIM again. He ism, look ini;
for love. lie doesn't want love with
my part OF his conscious mind. bu;
the, ovcrwceninr loneliness. which
DRY SO unsatisfactory. Graves "a way
out: Nothing short OF charm. mag
netic, irresistible lure can awaken
me widower from dreaming and his
SubconSicouS soul recognizes this.
Good Sport>mnn>hip Desired.
The bachelor says that good
snortsmanship" is what man most
wants from women. Going his eager.
self-centcred way, along a path Of
life which he has very satisfactorily
marked out. the bachelor fears in
plans upset. He doesn't know how 10
1ace being called 10 account when
the freedom Of his existence il; based
so completely on being accountable
To no on" and TO nothing but his
own whim and the convenience of
Tho moment.
No woman can seem supcrlativcly
ATTRACTIVE 10 him il he hauls him up
and holds him punctiliouSly 10 en-
Sarcments. suppose he wants to
work in his office until seven? Then
how can he find lovablc the woman
who wh!mpcrs about the dinner on
EaCement for which he's late. or m.
eel?
But the married man--out of the
wisdom Of his years Of adjusting him
self to another personality in order
10 ma happiness with it--says that
what man most desires Of woman ia
sympathetic understanding And
j think he is rieh;-for sympathctic
understanding holds In itself all the
quail which make for happiness
sympathetic understanding can
hoi he iclt by one person for another
unless that other know all and for
gives all" II means knowing another
human being just as he is and loving
him for being 80. II means accepting
the things which add up TO make the
personality YOU love. and finding COM
nensat!cn for one quality in another.
IL means satisfaction with tho real
instead OF cropping for an ideal and
knocking over all the facts in the
side OF imagination
sympathy n Rig Asset.
Given woman who is deep in
crested in his ambitions. ana can
come to her with the story of his
work and aspirations With hcr as
ms confident he can climb toward his
goal Sympaihctic understanding is
IN tune with tho lonGinGs and cray
inGs OF mans nature-be they spiri-
tNai. mental or physical II does nor
-"antonly refuse love the fun rift of
sell or II shares desire through un-
otrstanding II adjusts it's mind as
. well as it's soul to unison.
4 The man and woman who care
deeply for each other must try 10
grow together. so that there will he
spiritual as well as mental harmony
IN tneir life together, What they do
not fully share they must undcrs,anI
What they do not fully comprehand
must sim ind them so sympathcij,
. ihat they are ready 10 accent with
liberation and enthusiasm
After all! what a man demands Of
ioV. Is also what a woman Graves
And which Of us can hope for any
ming better from life than 10 he
Loved completely for just what We
When emotion might he Jealous.
ssymnath thy Will smile. Where devo-
tion may be critical, understanding
MI! see the motive behind the aC,
Where all else would. fail, the tender
insight OF one wnt'.iovts. tMith sym
pathetic undcrst"r i,rg viii have INC
great gift Of putting herself in his
place or Of being willing TO acccn,
Just because the thing is one of ,hc
gear. queer Ways OF the man she
When two people bring 10 their
nndersta nd!ng- can love 20 o,
the rocks