Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1920-05-07

A rattle or shiny crio,
A high chair or a fancy bib.
But how l pray that were he-
AS dirty as he wants tc be.
Whenever / begin to play
To drive the gloomy thoughts away
And feel bit of joy and hope,
They come and fill my mouth with
soap.
Now that we're all logged out In
jeans. somebody has started a wear
no hat movement After that, we sup
pose. they'll start wear-n no overalls
movement, and then the police will
interfere.
You can't always Judge a fool by
his face. Sometimes it's necessary
to have a look at his wife.
The governments crusade against
the profiteers' ring is too much like
q safety razor-it scripes the sur
face. but never breaks the skin.
A DYING CHILDS PLEA.
Mother. dear mother. your little one
dies!
Answer oh. answer my pitiful
prayers
Who hoists the rain-drops up, up to
the skies.
And who puts the chewing gum
under the chairs3
Some OF tho boys who took that
little vacation over in France must
find it pretty exciting back home
here In the states with q presidential
campaign and n lot of strikes and
parades and strawberry festivals all
going at once!
Beach resorts are elready begin
ming to remove the moth balls from
their sea serponts.
And. speaking OF queer fish. the
difference is this: You put plain,
ordinary lobster in hot water and he
turns red. Do the same with a red
and he turns first white and then
yellow.
-
h This bird d'Annunzio Is irrepres-
sible! Here he goes forming an anti
league OF nations and stealing all
Hiram Johnson's campaign stun!
We've otter wondered why poll
ticians always have fat necks. Per-
haps It's protective tissue in case
the people don't vote right.
RONDEAIJ.
Your rondeau spend In trifling vein.
From subjects over-g-ave abstain.
A facile hand the Tyre should sweep,
Don't try to scale Parnassus steep
Or, else the fragile form you'll strain.
On laughing eyes Of Grace or Jane
Or loves encircling silver chain,
Or any motif rot too deep,
Your rondeau spend.
Two rhymes: one thought-your
course is plain.
Now soft and light as April rain.
Or lullaby that woos to sleep
Your lines in harmony should leap.
And then, to twist the last refrain
Your rondeau's penned.
IL labor unions can only sign up
Mother Nature. Jupe Pluvius, Aurora
Borealis and Pa Neptune, they may
be able to make the next general
strike a humdinger.
Father Time, of course, will not
join. He believes in a twenty-four-
hour day.
It's got so that every time the gov
eminent issues dollar bill II utters
a litter. Every single one is now
signed by Houston B. Teehee. regis
trar Of the treasury.
II the young idea could only be
taught to shoot the "economicar'
politicians who are blocking raises
In pay for school teachers!
INCONSISTENCIES REVISION.
Q. yeast is yeast and vets are vets
ana always the twain shall meet.
Until the last protesting dry IL hum
bled in defeat.
We conoede that there may be an
economic reason for . strike of ele-
vator operators. But consider all the
interesting people they meet and
think OF the glow Of satisfaction that
must suffuse them when they start
tneir cars with rush ana stop them
with a jerk. carrying your body along,
put leaving your feeling on the floor
above or below, AZ the case may be.
The only one big union there's
room for in this country is The Unit
ed States Of America.
Mascagni and Puccin1. tho demon
composers. have been elected 20 the
Italian senate. Maybe they can send
note to dAnnunzio that will com.
pose him. r. "
| Each and Every /
Spoonful Of
|Glape}luts
Is a spoonful HI
dh health food