The midland journal. (Rising Sun, Md.) 1885-1947, 1920-10-01
A SHORT STORY

Still what else could you expect
of 210-pound young hick who wore
baby-blHe tie and carried pearl
handled pocket knife in channels
case? That's as good a pen and ink
closeup as can give you of this
Ham. Curtis party. Well, maybe l
might add that he had cute little
rosebud mouth, ears like lima beans,
and wore his mud-colored hair brushed
straight back, like the boys in the col
lar ads.
Near as can make out young Mr..
Curtis is in trainin' to help his old
man run the bond business. That is,
one of these days. But he don't seem
in any grand rush to horn in on the
regular 8 to 5 schedule No, he be-
lieves in easin' himself into high
finance gradual and not lettin' his
enthusiasm for work interfere with
any important Country Club dates.
such as garden teas and dinner dances.
Besides there are the young ladies.
Trust fat man for not overlookin'
the fair sex. Uh-huh! That may not
be the regulation dope, but it's the way
I've got 'em sized up. And the more
weight they carry the mushier they're
apt to be. Take Ham. Curtis as Elk.
hibit A. Watch him at any social
function, from an afternoon tea fight
to an annual ball, and you'll see him
buzzin' around like an over-fed butter
fly, first with one sweet young thing
and then another, TOWN. 'em off into
shady hooks and dark corners, and
gettin' over the Romeo lines, expect,
at every openin'. How he gets away
with it, considerin' that 44-belt meas
ure and the roll Of fat where the back
of his neck ought to be, is past me,
but he seems to be quite a success.
AS for minglin' much with his fell
low males, that appears to bore Ham.
more or less. You don't find him
hangin' around the billiard room
swappin anecdotes with the other
young hicks while the jazz orchestra
is zoomin' out one-step or fox
trot. Not Ham. At the first squeal
of the saxaphene he'll be out on the
floor with some zippy young yamp
cuddled up against his manly chest,
shalkin' out the shimmy steps like he
was a sparrow takfn dust bath.
So feel highly honored where here
the other night Ham follows me onto
the sos and slides into two-thirds of
my seat
II say, Torchy,"" says he, "what
about this little Miss Candy who's
visiting at the Bob EIlinses'?"
.Eh?" sayslI. "Ain't you held her
hand and told her the story of your
life yet Why. you've had nearly two
whole days! Been in Jail. or whaf?"
ooh, I've met her all right" says he.
"Had a couple of dances with her at
the Country Club the other night
And say, she's perfectly all right. But
somehow didn't seem to get on with
her very well.''
"Now that's strange" says /.
Couldn't you lead her out to your
fav'rite nook and spring the usual
lines?"
How ,o,,tc. yaov;sb IIA aiu,t much
used to being kidded, but in his case
it's plain he's made up his mind to
stand for it because he knows I'm in
with the Ellinses and maybe can be
helpful
That's all tommyrot about my
having any usual lines. you know,
Torchy," says he. 81 like girls well
enough. and perhaps have played
around with them more or less; bur
honestly, there's been nothing serious
until-well, until met Edith"
"Oh!" says 1. Got that far durin'
the second dance, did you? Her mama
is Edith, is it? How'd you discover
that?"
asked her, naturally" says Ham.
81 always do. It's such sweet name,
Edith. Don't you think so?' ~
Never tasted it." says /.
"Oh, you know what mean," says
he Seems to be SO appropriate for
her. Really, couldn't imagine her
having any other name. 1t goes so
well with her clear gray eyes, and her
petite figure. and her shy. modest
manner. Stunning hair she has. too.
Pm crazy about ash blondes"
Are your says I, smotherin' o
yawn i was beginnin' to wonder II
I'd got to listen to. this sort of thing
all the way home.
Not all of them, Of course" says
Ham. But I've always admired the