Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1920-06-21
HOPE FOR THE MARRIED

Now that domesticity and the
humdrum dailyness OF married life.
has begun to carry such social
stigma that young husbands are hid.
Ind their licenses under the hall rug.
while blushins brides wear their we'd
ding rings only in the privacy OF the
bath, we rise to inquire what mar
r1ed couples who didn't realize their
disgrace soon enough and confessed
their hopelessly bourgeois unions to
the whole world are going to do
about it?
There must be some relief from
the pitiless contempt with which al,
modern minded people regard tn.
breakfast table occupied seven days
out of the week by a man and !;
woman who, unfortunately, have
perfect right to be there.
All, yes-there Is. The remed.
is divorce. Not the ordinary, COM
monplace. newspaper headlined. gos
siped- about. old fashioned divorce.
but secret. not to stay suppressed di-
vorce. For just as notoriety shakes
the dew from the wedding bell anu
publicity steals the charm fro
the divorce and withers the romance
In the courts distinction.
Let us assume that a married
couple, truly fond Of each other, yet
haunted by the disgrace of their
wedlock, have quietly sought judicial
relief What is the effect?
Mrs. Matilda Flimp Ia popular.
smokes cigarets, drinks a cocktails
(when she can get it), tells an inn.
proper story most winsomely, be-
lieves in bolshevism and reads Freud
or at least says she does. In fact,
she Is modern in every particular
and eligible under the strictest social
standards to the most advanced set.
Yet she has the encumbrance OF
husband. 1t is known that they live
together-in the same house. Cos
sip does the rest and Mrs. FIimp's
acquaintances sorrowfuily begin to
drop away.
Finally, her best friend, Natalie
Spinfit, comes to her. Miss Spinfit
also has a husband, but only few
Of her closest associates know II.
They meet only on alternate Tues
days and Fridays and then merely
for quiet plate of ham and eggs
over a chaf1ng dish.
Matilda" sobs Miss Spinfit, the
tears streaming down her Russian
blouse and falling drip-drip drip into
her little Oxford ties, II have been
your friend thru thick and thin,
especially thru thick. But we can
no longer meet, Matilda. You have
husband perfectly conventional
husband, whom you publicly ac-
knowledge as your spouse. He is in
this house even now. AS entered
he was washing the second story
windows. 1t breaks my heart to say
it, dear, but we must part. have
my reputation to think Of"
But Mrs. F1imp does not drape
herself, fainting, upon the floor, as
you might expect. She seizes her
friend by the arm.
Come with me. Natalie, she
Kisses.
Mystiaed, Miss spinft is led from,
room to room and finally into the
kitchen. With supurb gesture.
Matilda Flimp throws open the re-
frigerator and brings forth q packet
of papers tied with red tape. That
is to say, she takes the papers out
of the refrigerator.
Read" she demands triumphant
ly.
"FIimp versus Flimp Oh,
Matilda shrieks Miss Splindt in an
ecstasy. It's your divorce decree.
And it's four years old!"
Into each others arms they fall.
sobbing out the gurgles Of renewed
friendship and restored respect. Mr..
Flimp. meanwhile, continues to pol
ish the window panes Of the second
floor front.
Picture this touching scene repeat
ed in home after home thruout the
land. OF course, there may be varia-
tions. You may imagine "a middle
aged couple taking their divorce de-
cree out for q picnic. Or a lisping
little girl learning from her mothers
knee with thankful heart that her
parents are not really married after
all. But the principle remains the
same.
Truly, as one of our leading and
most widely pictured specialists.
with solemnly uplifted finger. used
to say:
THERE is HOPE!"