The Coconino sun., 1920-02-20

it a sharp cut, and was dumbfounded to hear voice from under the hat ex- claim:
 "Hey, there! What the heck are you trying to do?"
 Then Herb made the alarming dis covery that the owner was up to his ears in mud.
 "Great heavens" he exclaimed, Sis the mud that deep over there ?"
 Deep" answered the victim, "why man alive, I'm standing on load of hay"
 Just after MT. Tinsley, the Salva- tion Army worker had addressed the Boosters club at their meeting on February 5, Lester Ruffner, president of the Prescott chamber of commerce and one of the prime movers in the wild west celebrations there, Was in troduced to speak about cooperation between those conducting the celebra- tions there and here in Flagstaff. He started out by paying a graceful trib- ute to the Salvation Army; then gravely informed Mir. Tinsley that the horses down Prescott way had shook hell out of as many young men, as the Salvation Army had.
 It is reported that not long ago the Saginaw and Manisee Lumber Go. shipped carload of lumber from Williams to Phoenix and that, on it's arrival, the customer wired back:
 Carload of knot-holes received. Please ship knots to fit holes.'
 About thirty high school pupils journeyed to Ada last Thursday even ing to birthday surprise on Miss Ruth Dirmeyer of that city. On the way they told stories, sang songs, played games, and scratched each others faces with straws, and "that ain't all."-Dunkirk, Ohio, Standard.
 Shortly after County Attorney F. M. Gold graduated from law school, he moved to a sparsely settled county in the western part of his home state, Kansas. Though it was a republican county, he entered the race for the off, flee of county attorney. At big po- litical rally he was called upon to speak. He knew that most of his hearers were republicans, and that his chances of winning favor was slim. After a few minutes talk, he decided to stake his chance of making hit with the audience by telling a story. So he said:
 Probably good many of you won der why 1 ever came out here. I'll tell you. had just graduated, want ed place to practice law, and so wrote to a man in this county, whom l knew slightly, telling him was hon. est and democrat, and asking him to advise me what the opportunities were here. He replied that as long as l was honest 1 would have no competi- tion, and that, being democrat, would be protected by the game laws. So came."
 Colds yarn made the desired hit, all right. and he was the only demo- crat elected to office in that county at that election.
 Jesse L. Boyce, state auditor, and not at all unwilling to be governor, was with a party of men visiting the state insane asylum at Phoenix, it is said. He strolled into an empty cell, someone swung the door shut, it lock ed, and the rest of the party lodged around into a corridor out of Jesse's sight. Then they sent guard past the eel.
 Hey" called Jesse. Let me out of here"
 Cant do it," the guard replied, and went on. Soon another guard passed.
 "Hey," Jesse shouted. "Let me out of here. Pm the state auditor"
 "Sure," said the guard, "all you fellows think you are something big" and on he walked
 To a third guard who dropped around in few minutes, Jesse yelled, this time thoroughly mad:
 "Hey, let me out of here,
 it, l ain't crazy; I'm the state auditor"
 "Sure," the guard said. "They all say they ain't crazy"
 Presently two guards walked up to- gether. Jesse tried to attract their attention, his language decidedly em- phatic. They ignored him, but, com ing to stop near him, began to talk so he could hear them, about how dangerous he was, the necessity for putting him into a straight-jacket, etc.
 Fortunately for Jesse's patience, dignity and his hope of the hereafter, in few minutes later his friends de- cided he could be released.
 John Weatherford tells on himself the reason he left his dads farm, a few miles from the little settlement of Weatherford, Texas. He had just returned home one morning when his mother told him that the county sher- if had been there a short time before. asking for him. John at once packed a bundle, jumped on his pony, went to the nearest railroad station and took train to the end of the rail- road, which was then building west l. , JOHN McWILLIAM'S :