davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1920-07-22
JUST FOLKS
ny EDGAR A. GUEST.
THosE UNFoRTUNArE nREAKs.

THOSE UNFORTUNATE BkEAkS-
When l was very wise and young
kept no brakes upon my tongue
let 1t gallop. trot or pace
At any time or any place.
And frequently to my chagrin
used to exercise my chin.
lsut am Older grown today
And do not have so much to say.
Unless I'm certain of my ground
My vocal shords don't make sound.
"oh, gosh :" said I, with courage rare,
Who is that homely woman there?
In all my days I've never seen
living human butter bean.
lsut there's dame from feet to chin
That's just as flat and just as thin!
She's one the angels high above
Would find 1t difficult to love.
Yet some guys tied to her for Iifei'
Yes said The stranger, "she's my wife. "
"0f all the books that recall.
There goes the biggest boob OF all.
II that bird had pound of brain,
He'd still be far from being sane"
The pretty damsel turned her head:
I That is my brother joe" she said.
There goes a chap that detest,
lie Is nuisance and q pest"
The lady's checks at once turned red,
That is my husband, Sir" she said.
oh, lessons. have sadly learned
As with chagrin my Checks have burned
oh. splutterings, I've made In vain
As I've attempted to explain!
oh bitter hurts I've tried TO nurse
Aud soothe. always to make them worse
Now | am older grown and gray
And do not have so much to say.
| haid my tongue, and never let
IL utter speech / may regret.
Copyright, 1919, by Edgar A. Guest.)
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1920-07-22
LITTLE BENNY'S NOTE BOOK
az LEE PARE

Ma was in her room holding one
hand up at her he'd and saying, deer,
wonder who invented he'd axes, o
my. suteh a he'd axe,
Watts the matter, ma, you got a he'd
axe? sed.
That's putting It mildly, sed ma.
Meening she had a fearse one, and 1
thawt, G, I wonder IL can cure 1t by
hipmotism?
Sounding like a good ideer. and I
got in back of mas chair where she
couIdent see me and started to wave
/, 2. 3. he'd axe, I command YOU TO
dissapeer.
1Tich waited about a ninnit to
give 1t a chance and then l sed, How
do you feel now, ma? ~
Verse, sed ma.
Maybe you feel better and its sutch
a serprize it ony seems verse, 1 sed.
Maybe you have the sents you were
born with and maybe not, 0 deer, wat
a he'd axe. sed ma. Me thinking.
Gosh, that's funny. And I tried it agen,
waving my hand different frum wat I
waved them the ferst time and think
ing, He'd axe this is yoF last chance,
I command you to change yourself
into a butter fly and fly away.
And 1 waited another minntt and
then 1 sed, How is 1t now mat o.
sutch a he'd axe, its pounding like a
million hammers sed ma. and sed.
Gosh. does it feel enythtng like a but
ter fly, ma?
Does that? sed ma. And she gave
me a fearse krack feeling the opposite
of butter fly, and mas he'd axe did
ent go away till after suppir. either be-
cause the hipmotiEm dident have eny-
thing to do with it or because it took
| a long time to werk. being hard 10
prove wich and me not feeling like
asking eny more questions.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1920-07-22

There appears to be little chance
that the railway workers will reject
the wage award of the labor board.
Among the wage earners of all sec
lions and groupings the responsible and
honest railway labor leaders were the
first to declare that they would rather
have lower living costs than higher
wages because constantly increasing
wages without correspondingly in
creasing production simply pump up
prices higher than ever. Intelligent
labor the country over must sooner or
later agree with the common sense
railroad men that making things cost
more and more will not make their
bread and butter cheaper.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1920-07-22
Is YEARS AGO IN TOPEKA
From tho Columns OF
THE TOPEKA STATE JOURNAL
July 90. 1895,

July 90. 1895.
The Labor day committee of the Trades
Assembly has selected Garfield park as the
place for holding the afternoon sports.
T. T. 1ellam of Topeka Is making some
interesting experiments at Burlingame in
shaft has been leased by Mr.. Payntor.
inventor of the machine; Mr.. Marks. a
practical miner, and Mr.. Kellam. Fully
one-half of the cost of digging is in pick
Ing the soil away from under the coal vein.
The machinery to be used drills this out.
1t - costing the iessees of the Deming
shaft $500 to get started.
c. =, HaHley of Shenandoah Ia. Is visit
ing in Topeka. Mr.. Hanley and c. F.
Bridge were old time playmates from 1860
to 1854 in Sivel Bend. la. Since that time
they have never met until now.
J. II, LarimeF left today to join his fam
~ az Sunny Side House. Aanitou, where
he will remain until August 10.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1920-07-22
Dorothy Dix Tails
BX DOROTHY DIX
z's HiEhesA Paid Wsmnz
Company vs.. Home Folks-a.

Company VS.. Home Folks-2.
In proof whereof. take Exhibit A,
wherewith most of US are all too IA
miliar.
Mrs x is going to have company to
dinner. She goes upon an orgy of
house cleaning until everything shines
like a new pin. The table Is iInmaeu-
late. The dinner is cooked to per-
lection. for Mrs. X is master cook
when she turns her hand to It, Mrs.
x herself is charming in a becoming
froek
But when there is nobody home but
the family, Mrs. x lets the house go at
skies and sevens; the tablecloth is
soiled, and she slams any old unappe-
tizins food in any old way on the ia
bic. 1t is too much trouble to put in
the dash of paprika that turns hash
into gouiash, or to give the little touch
that changes the poor meal into a good
one, just for home folks. And Mrs. Y
herself is fFoWsy and cross because
she doesn't waste her charming
clothes and personality on just hus-
band and the children.
And Mr.. X doesn't treat Mrs. X as
if she were company. either. II he
were dining with Mrs. Q he would
praise Mrs. as cooking to the skies.
and tell her how beautiful she was
| looking, and he would make himself
an agreeable and charming compan-
ion.
But at home Mr.. X gobbles down.
without a word of praise, the dainty
dishes his wife may have spent hours
in preparing. He never notices how
she looks. and he sits up so silent and
glum behind his paper of an evening
that she might as well be married TOY
stone effigy of a crouch so far al any
be about as companionable and inter-
esting as the other.
Likewise consider Exhibit B. When
Mrs. A. meets Mr.. b. she puts forth
all of her feminine charms and graees
to please him. She listens with an
enraptured expression while he proses
along about what he said TO the boss
and what the boss said to him; she
laughs merrily over chestnutty stories
that she heard while still in the
him until he sweils and beams with
self-complaceney under her manipula-
tions.
But she does not hesitate to yawn
in her husbands face when he starts
recounting his office experiences, nor
she has heard an oft-repeated story a
million times; neither does she hold
her hand from stabbing his vanity in
thousand places.
And Mr.. A. pays Mrs. B. compli-
ments that make her gurgle with de-
nSht, Whlle ne tens MS VIE nome
truths about her appearance that
cause her to shed bitter tears. Yet
the KS really love each other. and
the AS are devoted to each other and
desire each others happiness. and
don't care a rap for the BIS and
the as.
And so the little boys conundrum
remains unanswered. Why do we
treat strangers so much better than
we treat our own? Why don't we
treat those We love as we'll as we treat
eOmDauV?
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1920-07-22

MIR. McAdoo favors the payment OF
treasury. This plan would enable ev-
cry man in the country to enter the
race. But there would still remain
the danger that the party in power
might play favorites. The voters this
year showed a considerable capacity
for handling the problem of campaign
expenditures. The man who probably
spent the smallest amount OF money
got the nomination at Chicago. Ac-
cess to the federal treasury would not
have helped him.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1920-07-22

was telling another about his expert
ence of the night before. And she
and l had dinner downtown" he con-
Guided. 1T only cost s2.25."
That was a pretty cheap meal for
a hotel" commented the friend.
Well said the first, IT couldn't
help it. That's all the girl had on
her"
DO lizards Spend?
This sort of thing is undoubtedly
carried on by some of the curb lizards.
Others are slightly indignant over the
suggestion that Porker will never
spend money. And it Is quite true that
mem beers of that particular species OF
curb lizard have been seen on at least
three occasions paying for lemonade
checks in a down town drug store.
However, viewing the matter from the
scientific standpoint, we find that the
bulk of the evidence is that the lizard
is not as a type a notorious spender.
One of the most unusual features of
the PorkeT tribe is the magazine which
they issue weekly. This sheet is a
typewriter affair gotten up rather
hastily and only for the edification of
the club 1t consists in the main of
jokes and comments on the doings of
members. particularly their conquests
of feminine hearts and purses
To the credit OF the organization, no
a news note reads: The spiffy little
dame in pink with the lonesome doll
expression was seen with Blinks
Brown again last evening. Striped
Creek papers please copy"
This magazine is the one sign of
eruditiOn so far noted in the curb
lizard species. For the most part,
agility in the dance, and a record for
long distance eating are more admired
than brains by the lizard and his Liz.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1920-07-22

E =. Copeland says the public will
not feel the freight rate advance
which will be necessary to meet the
$500. 100000 wage increase awarded
TO railway workers. and he probably
IS right about it. But what the public
will feel will be the increased profits
which it will pay in purchases. Deal
ers. If they follow their usual custom,
will collect 50 for every extra dollar
they pay to meet freight charges.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1920-07-22
George Matthew Adams
Daily Talk
MAN-woMAN.

Put a noble man and woman side by
side-and you may look upon far finer
things than any touch of hand or
thought of brain ever conceived
No two men or women are alike
tho each is made IN the image of the
Creator.
A mantle trail blazer and path
finder, the newer, the builder. the pro-
ysder, the fighter and protector-the
loader over hard stretches and thru
untried things
A woman-the understander, the
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1920-07-22

If congress had repealed the excess
profits tax and thereby reduced the
cost OF living. as it could have done.
there might have been no necessity for
the advance in wages granted by the
railway labor board with a possible
further advance in living costs. Some
time, somewhere, the endless chain
must be broken.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1920-07-22

The man who aided by the Nonpar-
tisan League defeated Volstead for the
Republican nomination for congress
in the Minnesota primary has been
ruled off the track by the courts,
The situation looks promising for the
success OF a Democrat in the Velstead
district. The Leaguers who refused to
vote for the author of the dry law in
the primary may be expected to vote
for his opponent in November.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1920-07-22

The allies nave agreed to help Po-
land in resisting the onward march OF
the Bolsheviki, if she will retire with
in her own boundaries. But if Poland
will give up the plan of trying to ex-
tend her Jurisdiction over neighboring
territory. perhaps she will need no
help.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1920-07-22

Collar makers are reported to have
met and agreed to lower prices. II
they had agreed to raise prices their
action would have been called q vio-
lation of the antitrust law and prob
ably Mr.. Palmer's men would have
been down on them.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1920-07-22

If figures tell the truth. food prices
are continuing to decline slightly.
Bradstreets Food Index number.
based on the prices per pound of
thirty-one articles used for food, Is
s4.T4. which compares with $4.79 the
previous week and s5.22 for the week
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1920-07-22

The suggested British plan of with
drawing from Ireland and permitting
the island to shift for itself is not a
bad one Probably it would be but a
short time until the Irish would be
glad to re-enter the fold.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1920-07-22

endinx July II. 1919. It shows a loss
of per cent in week and of 90
per cent from the like week of last
Heau
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1920-07-22

Our own interest In the proceedings
of tbs third party convention was cas-
ual. but we were SO intrigued by the
query of the delegate who asked
whether the convention had met to
follow a leader or to eliminate the
damned evils of our present rotten
system of government" that We made
note OF his name. It was Lefkowitz.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1920-07-22

The country is in a bad way. AS .
native of il. we wish to see no man
detained in il against his will. We,
therefore. ask that unanimous peFmis-
sion be granted Mr.. LefkoWitz to re-
turn to the one in which he got his
name.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1920-07-22

We feel this way about It: We have
grown accustomed to the present sys-
tenn OF government. 1t does not great
ly annoy us. But it must crate harsh
ly upon one of the name OF Lefkowitz.
and we would not wish to see its rigoFs
and its hardships imposed upon any
such.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1920-07-22
A~I1 49,

Copyright, 1920. by the Wheeler Syndicate
Inc.)
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1920-07-22

We quarrel mildly with the contem-
porory writer who refers to the
French revolution as a surgical opera
ton. The French revolution was an
application of the abattoir motif to
government.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1920-07-22

In view of the fact that Mr. Bris-
bane's friend, Mr.. Hearst, had been,
perhaps, the most insistent of these
who demanded a third party. Mr..
Brisbane's comment on the conveH-
ton is more than interesting. 1t is
illuminating.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1920-07-22

Recurring to the third party. which
we had no intention of doing again to-
day, il seems to us the most interest
ing comment upon its convention was
that of Arthur Brisbane. "Grasshop-
pers." writes Mr., Brisbane. have in
Vaded a town in Michigan. swarming
thru the city streets. doing a million
dollars worth of damage to growing
crops. You read and pass on to the
next column. The grasshoppers now
are not important, but in the old days
they We're"
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1920-07-22

1t still is necessary for those who
run for office to say they will enforce
the law; but that is about all that is
expected of them.
The Seward gateway daily edition, and the Alaska weekly post., 1920-05-27

.oration of governmental abuses long since become intOlerable to civilized white men. Tho adhcrcntS of this con ccpt a!c few; they realize that at best statehood is but a possibility of the remote future; but hope that its ad- vocacy may meanwhile influence the American Congress to redress the more gricvouS and destructive evils.
 Alaska has borne the burden of American political domination for q half century and more, with the net result that today it is govcrnmentally a hopeless wreck, and, despite the heroic sacrifices and unrcmitting toll of its people, is fast becoming an in- duStrial barren under the blight Of bureaucratic government, With any fair or equitable or intelligent system Jf civil administration during that period of fifty years and more, Alas Ia would rank today in population md wealth with it's corresponding leighbors of northern Europe. ln- stead, it is slowly reverting to tn" status of a primeval wilderness.
 In view of this shameful record 5r maladministration and the coIre- lated circumstance that each succeed ing year has witnessed the creation oi fresh abuses, burdens and restrictions, together with added inefficiency in governmental service, it is difficult to hope, and impossible for a candid mind to believe. that relief will come while Alaska remains a dependency of the United States under it's present jurisdictional status.
 All things considered, statehood for Alaska within the time of men now living may be dismissed as dream, q fantasy, a thing absurd. Statehood in the remote future is solely in the lap of the gods; but even were it ccr- tainly attainable, it might well tax the wisest stateSmanship to determine if it would be advantageous either to Alaska or the United States under any conditions imaginable. The great Re public is amply large geographically and it's territorial unity is source oi both strength and pride to it's people Moreover, it k difficult to imagine a time OF circumstance in which Amer
The Seward gateway daily edition, and the Alaska weekly post., 1920-05-27

intelligent men whose children are corn in Alaska, and who themselves expect to be buried in Alaska, would favor a political connection with the United States government of a mu-
 uasly advantageous character, if such were possible, rather than total scy- ,rarcC of political bands. And, there appears no adequate reason why a nominal political connection similar to that SubSiSting between the Canadian Dominion and the British government would uot answer the purpose. It
 would hold for the United States gov
 pnmcnt all the advantages it could 'airly expect or, indeed, that either ,Uuity OF sound policy would justify; and. at the same time, free Alaska nom governmental dependency and
 u incidental administrative policy be- rome iutolcrablc. and which in it's very puturc cannot continue indefinitely. It nay we'll be doubted if there could be
 ound competent student of Alaskan affairs who does not foreSee that the utlue holds in store for Alaska either ritual independence or rigorous sub lection under a proconsular deSpot supported by the power of the sword alone. Should the might of the United States choose to inflict and enforce an dcSpotism in Alaska, it's on V gain would he deserted country, m empty shell. Even under the abuses of its civil administration more than sixty per cent of the people have been iorccd to abandon their Alaskan homes in despair and seek new doml- ci,rs i'm other lands. Under a military lcspoyiSm the remaining forty per cent would quickly disappear. 1t iS i'm conceivable that any government, and ps tiyu'miy a government under act ual o, oStcnSiblc democratic influence, would choose to invite such consequent ,es. And. there k no other ultimate excepting government of Alaska by the people of Alaska them selves. md a willingness by the gov crnmcnt or the United States to be content with the great but purely in cidcntal advantages derived from nominal Suzcrainty, supplemented by sho loyd friendship of a grateful peo. pie,
 In respect of Alaska as state, as thv domicilc of men, as q source of re- venue. as convertible asset, it must be administered by it's own and primarily in their own in tercsts. The United States govern mcnt cannot both eat its cake and have it.
 Statehood has been advocated by various AlaSkanS aS a means of amel-
The Seward gateway daily edition, and the Alaska weekly post., 1920-05-27

ican sentiment, not to mention Amcri- can political sagacity, would not hcsi- tate to attach to the Union as Sovcr- cign and equal States tar-diStant and nOn-cOntiguous regions. The unhappy thought obtrudcs itself even, that q willingness tO dO so might cyidruca d dccadence of both pride and patriot ism Of baleful promise to the proposed non-COntiguouS States. Such country might well hesitate to contract a re- lation of statehood with a Republic whose people had ceased to regard their natural and normal boundaries with jealous soicitudc. An American public sentiment become indifferent to it's traditional pride of solidarity could scarce be expected to entertain m adequate interest in a far-distant people thus connected with it by re- cent and purely artificial ties. And, also, the disagreeable but unavoidable conclusion forces itself upon the mind that since the United States govern mcnt, during a period of boaSted ethic- al virility uncxcelled in history, has forced upon the people of Alaska a policy of bureaucratic oppression such
 Continued to Paya o
The Seward gateway daily edition, and the Alaska weekly post., 1920-05-27
GIYCERINE MiXTI RE
 SURPRISES SEW ARD

The quick action of simple glycern", hlrktholn bark, etc, as mixed m .AEer-j-ka, is surprising. One spoon tul relieves ANY CASE gas on St'm- .,,h or sour stomach. Adler-i-ka acts on ROTH upper and lower bowel and removes all foul accumulated msti"i which poisoned stomach. Often CURES constipation. Prevents appendices, One lady reports she has no more pain in back of head or gas on Stom- :sh since using Adler-i-ka. SEWARD DRUG CO.,
The Seward gateway daily edition, and the Alaska weekly post., 1920-05-27

Continued to Page .
The Seward gateway daily edition, and the Alaska weekly post., 1920-05-27
Rrarlrh Grill

For the Best Food aud Most Perfect service. There iS None Better iu the City.
The Seward gateway daily edition, and the Alaska weekly post., 1920-05-27

Herring fish bait for sale at Hali. hut Cove, price three cents a pound.
The Seward gateway daily edition, and the Alaska weekly post., 1920-05-27
C|dSSifiedS

FOR RENT Furnished houses and cabins. See Doughcrty.
The Seward gateway daily edition, and the Alaska weekly post., 1920-05-27

GEORGE ANDERSON, piano ex- pert factory agent for high grade rianos. player and electric pianos, will be n Seward shortly, headquarters at the Overland Hotel. Home address, Juneau Alaska, Box 99l. A5tf.
The Seward gateway daily edition, and the Alaska weekly post., 1920-05-27
At rO\OMN \ SOIl TlO\
 FOR ALASKA PROBLEMS
,Gy Thomas E, pyaytoul

There k just one solution ot the Alaska problem, aud no morci and that solution k autonomy. it may b. accepted as a certainty that all ntrlh- gcut men tc whom Alaska is home, all
The Seward gateway daily edition, and the Alaska weekly post., 1920-05-27
READ THE
 GATEWAY ALL OF THE NEWS DAILY.
 TRAPPERS TRADERS SHIP TO GEORGE R. GOSHAW, INC. DEALERS IN RAW FURS

Seate New York, Alaska Building. l27 w. 27th Street.
 Ship direct New York for highest shipments handled by graders and New York Market Prices paid grading the received desired shipments will kept order that approved by Providing valuation does satisfactory the Fus will transportation charges prepaid Ship by Insured Parcel Express Ship condition Always enclose and address, All made check Bank other desired Special instructions
Mohave County miner and our mineral wealth., 1920-05-22
NOTICE TO CREDITORS

Estate of FERDINAND A. WILDE.
 Deceased:
 Notice is hereby given by the under signed, Robert W. Wilde, Ferdinand A. Wilde and Kenneth W. Davidson, execu- tors of the will of Ferdinand A. Wilde. deceased, to the creditors of and all persons having claims against the said deceased, to exhibit them, with the nee essary vouchers, within four months af- ter the first publication of this notice to the said executors. at their office in the counting room of the Desert Power and Water Company, Kingman, Arizona, the same being the place for the trans action of the business of said estate. in said County of Mohave.
 ROBERT W. WILDE
 FERDINAND A. WILDE
 KENNETH W. DAVIDSON. Executors of the Will of Ferdinand
 A. Wilde, deceased. Dated kngman, Arizona, this 2Sth day of April, 1920.
 First insertion May 1. Last insertion May 29-5t-up.