davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1920-05-27
Sheep and Lambs stronuer-
Hoped Pots and Jack cade.

In the Middle ages in England many
drinking pots were made with hoops
so that when two or more persons
drank from the same pot or tankarG,
no one Of them should take more than
his share, each hoop marking half,
third or a fourth of the contents of
the pot, according to its make.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1920-05-27
Tho rrouhla.

II told you sol I warned You that
you could not believe half he said.
"Oh, knew that before. The trou.
bic was that I believed the wrong
half.'
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1920-05-27
Tho Proof.

Tho Proof.
The new doctor who came hero 10
vaccinate the children must have been
In the army"
'What makes you think sol"
~As soon as he had them lined up
before him he said, Present arms.'.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1920-05-27
LOOK

AOOh
Jim's Place ON Lincoln Highway
! wish to announce to my friends
and the public at large, that I have
now opened the Lincoln Highway
Cafe as first class Cafe. It has been
remodeled throughout and entirely
new fixtures put In. We serve every
thing.
Special attention given to banquets
and parties. We strive to please all.
Our motto is first class service. and
reasonable prices.
Hoping to see all Of my old friends,
! am,
Respectfully
James Granzales. Prop.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1920-05-27

BODY OF EDMOND OLSON TO BE-
RETURNED FROM FRANCE.
Robert Olson, residing at ITO N.
18th street, has received a telegram
from Washington, D. c., stating that
the body Of his son, Edmond, will ar
rive at Hoboken, N. j., from France,
on June s. and will then be sent here.
Edmond was in the late Worlds
War, passing away from an attack Of
Flu and bronchial pneumonia.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1920-05-27
Extetnporlxlna.

sThat meeting Of actors led to some
confused discussion"
'Yes," replied Mr.. Stormington
Barnes. after all, 1t 10 best to call
In an author now and then to help
out with the dialogue"
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1920-05-27
NOTICE.

To the relatives and friends: The
Reel Association will hold their an
nual picnic in the park at Logan, if
the weather is favorable. If not, at
the house, as usual.
Effie Brayton, Cor. Sec.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1920-05-27
Tho AFFINITY.

"A fashionable hairdresser and an
advertising agent ought to make .
good pair"
"Why so!''
Because she wears puns and 10
puts wares"
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1920-05-27
DECORATION DAY OBSERVANCE
AT MAGNOLIA.
Sunday Afternoon, May 80.
PROGRAM.

PROGRAM.
1:15. Meet at L. D. s. church
lawn to form procession.
1880. or soon after procession to
cemetery, led by Logan Drum Corps.
2:4b. Exercises at school auditor
ium, consisting Of readings, recita-
lions, vocal music. addresses by Rev.
Noble and Elder Mcdowell.
A. N. Fyrando, Chm.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1920-05-27
Strategy.

.Gee, but it's late! VIII your wife
got up and let you in when you get
homer
"Tll make her. TIL scratch on the
door and whine. and she'll think her
dogs been locked out"
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1920-05-27

Il Makes q Difference.
Gsrtie Would you say that she u
good looking7
MaudeAThat depends.
Gertie-On what?
Maude-On whether was speaking
Of her face or to her face.-I.ondon
Answers.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1920-05-27
THE SALVATION ARMY LASSIE
DOUGHNUT.

DOUGHNU Ut.
Here is the recipe for the famous
Salvation Army doughnut that is
ranked among the big features in
winning the war "over there"
5 cups flour
2 cups sugar
5 teaspoonfuls baking powder
1 teaspoonful salt
2 eggs
y cup milk
tablespoonful lard.
Knead, cut and drop into boiling
lard. When thoroughly brown, serve
with smile.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1920-05-27
WARDS WILL REMAIN HERE.

WARDS WILL REMAIN HEkE.
We are sorry to have Mr.. and Mrs.
Harry Ward retire from the business
circle of our city, and wish them sue
cess in whatever enterprise they may
enlist. They will continue to make
their home in this city, and Mr.. Ward
will, no doubt, soon enter upon an
other line of business activity.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1920-05-27
Once Too Many sor
Have POINT n corn,,on 9.

It Is the general understandine that
there are all kinds of people In tie
world. but at times we get the notion
that ts.ey are oil exactly alike. Ct that
Wilmington News.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1920-05-27
suaplcloua.

Husband lat dinner)-By George,
this is regular banquet. Finest
spread I've sat down to In an age.
What's up7 Do you expect COM
panyi
Wife No, but think the cook does
Life.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1920-05-27
HIS LITTLE JOKE.

"Hey Buggy. it's a poor rule that
don't work both ways
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1920-05-27
Art and Nature.

The comic pictures rouse my mirth
They bring mo Joy each day.
And yet I'm glad that on this earth
1Sw people look that way.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1920-05-27

a Hopeless Undertaking.
There's no use arguing with Blig-
9ins." said the opinicnated man.
Cant you make him underestimate =
HE doesn't want to-. He simply
paws the air and shouts. The only
way to get him to listen to anything.
would be to chloroform him and then
he'd miss all the intellectual benefit
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1920-05-27
DIsnal DAYS for Jack,

Dismal Days for Jack.
Little Jack Horner sat In q corner.
But he didn't cat pudding or pie;
No raisin or plum adhered to his thumb.
For the price Of such things was too
high.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1920-05-27
A Awful Is Thounht

An Awful Thought
= believe in obeyins the law to the
letter."
$50 do r. said Mr.. Meekton earn
estiy. $50 do I. But you can bet I'm
glad don't live In q state whsre they
have those old blue laws still on the
books that permit man to discipline
his wife with switch % large q his
finger"
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1920-05-27
lto S11ukua

when ! marry, I am goins 70
marry for wealth."
That's rich joke" !.
Ones Too Many Sometimes.
II we had two heads" remarked
the man on the car. '.we'd have more
trouble getting them to track than we.
have with our feet. Toledo Blade
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1920-05-27
TOO LATE.

Hello. Tommy. what nice little
chap you, arei"
Jaw. 60 on. It's no use talk,n. ).
me Hike that Sis got . fsller q.
ready"
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1920-05-27

le uOpoS W Improve his neAlCN.
Mrs. C. E. Kane had the misfor-
tune to fall down stairs at her home,
last evening. She sustained a severe
shock from the impact, and numerous
abrasions. DIR. Hugh Tamisiea was
called and rendered the necessary
medical attention.
Harold Fitch has gone to Harding
ton, Neb., where he has accepted q
position in a barber shop.
Mr.. and Mrs. Lee Highley Of New
Meadows, Idaho, were guests at the
Anderson Thomas home. Thursday.
DR.. H. L. Roberts this afternoon
accompanied Miss Margaret Wiskus
to an Omaha hospital, where she will
undergo an operation.
Mr.. and Mrs. j. d. Brown have re-
turned from Los Angeles. Calf.
where they have been spending the
winter. They were accompanied by
Mrs. J. L. Hardy Of Massachusetts,
sister of Mrs. Brown. who also spent
the winter in the Golden state.
Mrs. T. H. Cooke, former resi-
dent, who has been spending the win
ter with her daughter, Mrs. Stella
Stevens, at Granville. New Mex,
has arrived at her home in Blair,
Neb. 4.
Mrs. ]. D. Murphy. daughter Mary,
and sons John and James, Of Omaha,
were the Tuesday guests Of the David
Edwards home.
Greenbrier independent. [volume] (Lewisburg, Va. [W. Va.]) 1859-1980, 1920-12-24
o. The -
Book
TAKING UP YANKEE METHODS
Chinese Beginning to See the Virtues
Of the Sewing Machine and the
! Typewriter.

Here and there in Manchuria new
sounds have recently become audible
"A steady, whirring noise emanating
from some Chinese household that has
recently become possessed Of sewing
machine. and click click-click from the
local office Of some foreign business
firm that tells the initiated that some
body within is operating n typewriter
Or perhaps the click click click Is er-
ratio, and then ono may know that
some ambitious young Chinese has &C.
CURED typewriter and is sedulously
teaching himself to use it, probably
with one finger. The sewing machines
are more common than the typewrit-
ers. for an American company has
sent its travelling men up and down
the land, and they have been selling
Its useful product even In remote cor
ners Of south Manchuria. AS for the
typewrlters, the only variety yet avail
able Is the small travelling machine
for which the Chinese student will
lingly pays 125 gold yen. His type
writer, In terms Of American currency,
costs him $62.50.
The demand for typewriters, In fact,
Is greater than the supply, and none
OF tho larger machines is yet on the
market. Sooner or later, no doubt.
there Will be plenty Of them, for the
foreign firms are opening more and
more local branches, each Of which
needs Chinese assistants with a knowl-
edge Of English, and. If possible. some
Skill at the typewriter. So far the
schools teach English, but the student
must learn typewriting as best he may
If he seeks to qualify himself, as
good many are said to do. for starting
commercial career as assistant In
| one Of these foreign businesses
Christian Science Monitor.
Greenbrier independent. [volume] (Lewisburg, Va. [W. Va.]) 1859-1980, 1920-12-24
ONE STEP SHORT OF SUCCESS
Too Many Men Lack Determination,
and So Arc ciassed Among Those
Who "Failed."

The world is full OF people who are
almost successful. Here is a man who
is almost physician, but not quite
mere another who Is almost physi-
clan, but is neither n good druggist.
good surgeon nor n good dispenser.
Another man is almost clergyman,
or about halfway between farmer.
or il tradeSmun. and clergyman. An
other is almost teacher. but not
quite competent to take charge OF q
school or an academy. We meet, ev-
cry day, people who are almost some
thing. but just little short Of It.
IL these people undertake anything,
they never quite finish 1t; they never
quite complete their course at school:
they never quite learn q trade or pro-
fession. They always manage to stop
Just short Of success.
We encounter people everywhere
who are almost happy. almost phil
osophical, almost religious, yet do not
exactly belong to any class or sect.
They never know just where they
stand; they are not quite anything.
Almost" Is dangerous word It has
tripped up many man who might
have been successful If he had had
determination and grit enough to 70
little further. to hold on little
lonSer.-Success.
Greenbrier independent. [volume] (Lewisburg, Va. [W. Va.]) 1859-1980, 1920-12-24
HOLDING CHEMICAL TRADE
Statistics Show That United States
Has Been Able to Hold High
Mark Set During War.

Official statistics for the fiscal year
1920 demonstrate that this country
has been able to keep its trade In
chemical and allied products very near
the high mark set during the war, de-
spite the loss Of markets for purely.
war. supplies and despite the pressing
demands that must be met In the do.
nestle market.
Such Is the conclusion reached By
o. P. Hopkins. a well-known stats
tician, writing in the Journal Of Indus
trial and Engineering Chemistry. -
I'm almost all lines except NUM-
tions." he writes, "the exports fri 1920
exceeded in value those Of 1918, a fact
that can be explained. in some cases.
perhaps. by rising prices, but, which
nevertheless warrants the assertion
that the position has not been weak
ened. These exports, which very
greatly exceed those OF the last nor
NAL pre-war year. are made up almost
entirely Of manufactured products.
Imports have more than held their
own and comprise raw and partly man.
ufactured products required for fur
ther advancement by American chem
fcal manufacturers"
Greenbrier independent. [volume] (Lewisburg, Va. [W. Va.]) 1859-1980, 1920-12-24
y DID YOU,
Q Ws,,an Ns~,p-s<s Un.,,

Did you give him a MT? He's 4 brother
OF man,
And bearing about all the burden he can.
Did you give him q smile? He was down.
cast and blue.
And the smile would have helped hin, tn
battle 1t through.
Did you give him your hand? He was
slipping down hill,
the world. 30 ! fancied. was using him
Ill.
Did you give him u word? Did you show
him the road.
Or did you just let him 20 on witt, his
load?
Do you know what it means to be losing
tho fight.
When lit just In time might set every
thing right?
DO you know what it means-Just a clasp
OF q hand,
When q mans borne about all q man
ought to stand?.
ing lip?
why the half-suppresscd sob, and the
scalding tears drip2
were you brother OF his when the time
came Of need?
Did you offer TO help him or didn't YOU
heed?
Greenbrier independent. [volume] (Lewisburg, Va. [W. Va.]) 1859-1980, 1920-12-24
PUT BETS ON JUMPING BEAN
Peculiar Gambling Game Among Mex.
icans at Least Has Merit Of Be-
Ing ION the Squares

One of the strangest and most un-
certain gambling games In the world
Is that played by natives Of Sonora
and Guerrero. in Mexico. The game is
played with brincones. or jumping
beans, small brown berry about the
Size. shape and general appearance Of
coffee bean. The beans contain the
pupa Of an insect, and 1t Is the iatter's
spasmodic movements that cause the
bean to hop about ut most unexpect-
ed moments.
The players gather in a circle about
a ring drawn on the floor with chalk
or merely scratched in the dust. The
contesting beans are put in the midi
die. and wagers are made as to which
bean will first by series Of jumps
clear the circle. AS the beans do not
pursue any one direction, but are apt
to hop back and forth without pro-
crossing an zach for a long time, the
game becomes highly exciting, and the
wagerS rise in value, reaching among
the richer Mexicans up into the hun
dreds. If not thousands of dollars. The
children gamble for bits Of food. fruit,
or even buttons by the same means.
The beans will retain their jumping
ability for months under proper care
or In other words until the pupa dies.
Greenbrier independent. [volume] (Lewisburg, Va. [W. Va.]) 1859-1980, 1920-12-24
HAS THE SAVIOR OF OLD DAYS
Picturesque indian Village Where,
Among Other Things, One May
Watch the Salmon Leap.

The little Indian village Of Awillgate,
on the Bulkley river in British Column
bia is famous for its leaping salmon.
writes Helene De Courcy Lett in Trav-
81. Here over a great rock which al
most blocked their way, salmon were
leaping. A leap Of ID feet is neces-
sary." Old-time packers and guides.
the old Hudson's bay posts, Indian dogs
and Fairgrounds, the towering Rocher
Desboules, ancient totem poles. and the
flashing fish leaping high In the air
above the mad whirl Of waters-all
these arc at Awillgate. All fishermen
will sympathize as they read of the
"large fish that we could see quite
plainly as they swan toward the edge
Of the pool" alas for the big ones
that get away when you have to watch
them swimming contemptuously past
your tly--and these were rainbow
trout There was an ancient bridge
there once, and upon 1t 10 squaws were
made ito dance to test whether 1t
was safe for n horse to cross, while
the fiimsy structure swung to and fro
above the boiling water"
Greenbrier independent. [volume] (Lewisburg, Va. [W. Va.]) 1859-1980, 1920-12-24
"HEAD BUCKET" NOW RELIC
Gruesome Article Passed With the
Passing Of the FeudaI System
Among tho Japanese.

One Of the most grim articles Of
household furniture known to man is
the kubioke. or head bucket of the
Japanese of the old days. The bucket
was part OF the furnishings of the
samurai, or fighting man in court cir
cies, and was kept by him In high,
narrow closet with sliding doors close
to an alcove, considered the place Of
honor Of samurais home. When the
mead OF the house offended his lord
there was no bother Of d trial or an
arrest. Instead there came q very DO.
lite note from the court, which stated
the lordy was sure that the samurai
would return the noble honor of his
family. The messenger took back u
note MS polite as the one brought, in
which the writer thanked his lord for
his honorable generosity.
He then shaved, bathed, donned q
white robe, and committed hari-kari by
falling on his sword. His head was
taken Off and placed In the kubioke,
wrapped in white paper. and q nap
Kin bearing his crest was placed over
1t. A messenger then took the bucket
to the court, where the head was ex-
hibited and identified and then re-
turned to the family with a polite note
Of regret.
The head-bucket now is merely q
decorative bit as little used as tho
spinning wheel OF our own parlors.
Greenbrier independent. [volume] (Lewisburg, Va. [W. Va.]) 1859-1980, 1920-12-24
FALLING PRICES.

They say books are growing cheap
But I get enough OF sleep:
And they say tie price of Ice cream
soda's coming down;
But that's something 1 don't drink
Unaccompanied by a wink
And to wink these days gets nothing but
q fro&n.
am told the price Of ships
Has descended. and that tips
Are about to do turn. to do their share:
And that chewing gum and curls
Will make happy lots OF girls
BY q fall they've calculated to a hair
It is said, that diamond rings
And that golden pheasant wings,
Also motorcars and furs are In tho throng
That will some day feel the gnn:
That a first-class phonograph
Will be purchasable next year for q song
Rncing yachts and aeropianes,
Lavish lavallieres for James,
Sarouk carpets. choicest curtains. sheer
and white.
Little things like bonds and stocks
Have run down already-clocks
VIII be doing 80 AZ wcil-the keys In
sight.
Well. I'm glad they've made a start,
But cannot say my heart
At the Hops we've thus fur felt has skipped
a beat:
That will happen on tho day
That bone won't look passe
Buying bread and butter. smokes and
milk and meat.
Maurice Morris. in New York Herald.
Greenbrier independent. [volume] (Lewisburg, Va. [W. Va.]) 1859-1980, 1920-12-24
Sea Lion Leather.

Large numbers of sea lions on tho
British Columbia coast which destroy
annually vast quantities Of fish food
may be slaughtered and their hides
placed on the worlds leather market,
If proposition which comes from
Premier Oliver and has the approval
OF many experienced fishermen. Is car
ried ont. The sen lion weighs irons
1000 to $500 pounds, the hides being
nearly m inch thick. These hides
make tough and durable rough
leather such us Is used In workmen's
gloves and in saddles. It is stated
that these animals will eat 50 pounds
OF fish In day. -Four hunters recent
ly killed several hundred sea lions in
one day In Charlotte Islands.-Sciea.
fife American. = .
Greenbrier independent. [volume] (Lewisburg, Va. [W. Va.]) 1859-1980, 1920-12-24
SUCCESS.

us DOING your Job the best you c4n
And being just to your fellow-man;
It's making money, but holding friends.
And staying true to your aims and ends:
ITS ngurlng how and learning why,
ana looking forward and thinking high,
And dreaming little and doing much:
It's keeping always in closest touch
with what Is finest in word and deed:
us being thorough. yet making speed:
IT'S daring blithely the field or chance
while making your work q brave TO.
nance:
It's going onw ard despite defeat
And hEhting stanchly. but keeping sweet:
It's being clean and it's playing fair:
It's laughing lightly Mt Dame Despulr:
us looking up at the stars above,
And drinking deeply Of life and love:
It's struggling on with the will to win.
But taking loss with cheerful grin:
It's sharing sorrow, and work and mirth,
And making better this dear old earth;
It's serving. striving through strain and
stress. '..
It's doing your noblest-that's Success.
Greenbrier independent. [volume] (Lewisburg, Va. [W. Va.]) 1859-1980, 1920-12-24
Movies tho eiqoest Industry.

The motion picture business now
tops the list Of California industries.
according to booklet just published
by Los Angeles bank. With more
than $150.OOO,OO0 invested this indus
try Is nearly twice the size Of its near
est competitor, oil, with $S7,OOOO00.
Expenditures in California last year
by the motion picture industry were
more than $120,OOO,O 900, and were con-
fined almost exclusively 10 Los An
geles and vicinity. San Francisco has
attracted little attention in this line
as yet, though one concern Is now pre-
pairing to locate at San Mateo.
Greenbrier independent. [volume] (Lewisburg, Va. [W. Va.]) 1859-1980, 1920-12-24
Why Go to Dentist?

If you have the toothache Just press
one Of your big toes and the ache will
disappear.
That's zone therapy. It's the lat
est thing, according to DR.. William Ii.
Fitzgerald Of Hartford, Conn.
He was one Of the speakers before
the Central Society Of Physical Their
apeutics, In convention at Chicago re-
Gently.
"Your whole body" Doctor Fitzger-
aid explained. us divided into ten per-
Greenbrier independent. [volume] (Lewisburg, Va. [W. Va.]) 1859-1980, 1920-12-24
OUR BIRTH RATE IS NORMAL
csnsus Bureau Statistics Show That
Births Exceed Deaths by About
One-Third.

The census bureau, on the strength
Of registered returns. gives figures to
show that the birth rate in the United
States exceeds the death rate by one
third. which is gratifying fact We
are not one of the nations that need
be anxious on this vital point as far
as present conditions are concerned.
One OF the most serious troubles in
France Is the warning in It's censuses
that In some years more Of its inhab-
itants die than are born. sumo Of
its neighbors grow much faster In
population. This disparity was some
what noticed in the past. yet without
fully realizing the terrible menace In
vOived. The desolated towns and
farms Of France are q monument to
the old census admonitions and the
awful sacrifice Of young French man.
hood Is far more dreadful than the
devastation. Often have the public
men Of France sounded an alarm ON
the defective birth rate. It Is much
discussed now by thoughtful French
legislators and writer's. A census al.
why's demands intelligent study.
The United States grows BY immi-
grafton as well as births, and our.
school system tends to Americanize
the whole body Of citizens. Our
schools are a great melting pot for
Americans Of the future and to In
crease their proportionate number.
The welfare Of children Is a great
national issue. The birth rate and
death rate need continuous attention.
Greenbrier independent. [volume] (Lewisburg, Va. [W. Va.]) 1859-1980, 1920-12-24
"Snow. Burnt" Rails DANGEROUS.

a curious cause Of railway accidents
Is brought out I'm q United States
interstate commerce commission re-
port on the derailment Of a passenger
train. The deralmcnt was caused by
the breaking of opposite rails which
had been "snow-burnt," this condition
apparently resulting from the friction
Of an engines wheels slipping on ac-
count Of being stalled In the snow.
The report states that "thc means Of
distinguishing between safe and un-
safe rails Of this type unfortunately
has not been made known as yet.
These "snow-burnt" rails nre somewhat
common.
Greenbrier independent. [volume] (Lewisburg, Va. [W. Va.]) 1859-1980, 1920-12-24
Has a Problem to Solve.

At Verdun near Montreal electric
light wires rubbing against the wall of
house lost their covering. The cleo
tricity ran down metal pipe into the
sheet iron covering Of the building. A
Jersey COW was passing with her neck
chain dangling. She brushed against
the house, the chain attracted the cleo
tricity and she fell dead. Her owner,
Donat Mailloux, not understanding,
pulled her leg to wake her up. and re-
celved shock which sent him to sleep.
He recovered after time and Is won
dering whom he shall sue to obtain
recompense for the loss Of the Jer-
sey-the owner of the house, the cleo
trio company, or the firm which in
stalled the WIRING