davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Birmingham age-herald., 1920-05-04
LUKE M,LuhE SAYS

When Friend Wife does the cooking, Friend Husband isn't so blame fond of kissing the cook.
 We hope that some of the books we have read recently were as tiresome to write as they were to read
 The man who knows it all at 20 is the same fellow who discovers that he doesn't know anytring at CO.,
 If some men got all that they prayed for there wouldn't be a blame thing left for the widows and orphans.
 When the kids act mean, mother tells father that the children got their meanness honestly and that they take after their father.
 We have often spent $50 and three days time getting three-cent fish But we are proud of the fact that we never spent s30 and three days time getting thirty-cen. rabbit
 The trouble with the man who owns pedigreed dog is that he does more barking than the dog.
 What has become of the O. f. bride whc used to get a feather mattress or a bolster for wedding present.
 Many man who cin trace his an is working for man who never had grandfather.
 A girl is mighty modest with her ankles when she is wearing ordinary cotton stockings. But it is different when she is wearing expensive silk ones.
 If man can't make a living at anything else he can always make a, pretty good salary by joining the Anti Saloon League.
 No married man Is cutie as fond of his wife as he Is of his wife's hus- band.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1920-05-04
From the New York Times.

T rum tle -NeW 1Ork Hines.
 WV sass sss' of s'' ss 's"s .ns'i.s 's ;'sss' ss'.
 phone during the Victory Loan campaign, when tn evoice of speakers was delivered through a sys- tenn of overhead megaphones half a block and more from the rostrum. The experiment which is to be made in Times Square tomorrow morning is of far greater magnitude and significance.
 As the Atlantic fleet steams up the harbor, Secretary Daniels. who is on the flagship Pennsylvania, will deliver an address to the people of New York, which will be transmitted by wireless to the Times building. There in the second story facing north, "maga- vox" and receiving horn are being in- stalled by wireless experts from the navy. It is hoped that this apparatus will make Mr. Daniels address audi be for at least block, in spite of the noice of traffic. If the experiment Is successful the apparatus will be used on the following days to transmit the hand concerts which are to be given on Admiral Wilson's flagship as long as the fleet remains in the Mort hriver.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1920-05-04
THE NITRATE PLANT

real purpose in the attempt to stay thc government hand was Ito kill the plant"
 Senator Shoot denied that the amend. ment would have the effect of killing the plant saying it would not interfere with it's operation, but only prevent additions being made until Congress could con- slider legislation now pending relative to what disposition was to be made of the project. He denied that any sinister in- fuences were back of the amendment and contended it was inserted in order to prevent further expenditures being made for the development of the plant until Congress could act.
 But the amendment none the less had the appearance of all that Senator Un- derwood said it was and would have tended to the evil result he indicated.
 The nitrate plant has great possibili- ties for good not for the south alone, but for the country at large. It can bs used for making fertilizers greatly need ed for farm production. It may compete with private enterprises of the same kind, and therefore runs counter to prf- vate interests, condition always likely to engender schemes of legislation in- in icable to a government enterprise.
 It is gratifying to know that the op- noxious amendment has received it's quietus, and that the work on the great nitrate plant will proceed.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1920-05-04
High Prices Preferred

Tt seems ingrained in the American judge values by the price mark" says Morris Bush, head of several industrial corporations.
 q saw negro miner recently enter a commissary seeking a pair of shoes. lie was shown a very serviceable shoe showed him a pair at s1o. He wanted better They presented pair for Sl2 Better still was the demand. The clerk drew from its receptacle the highest priced pair he had. They were s14. The negro took them
 But it is not negroes only. A young man whom I know we'll had invested in two residences, which he rented for number of years at very small net profit. Some time ago. seeing other residences disposed of to advantage, he placed one of his on the market at 5000. A num- Der of persons visited, inspected and went their way without purchasing at the very reasonable figure which he had set. Other residences not as well st- uated as his sold for more. He could not understand it. He consulted several real estate agents. They agreed that the comparatively low value placed on the property created suspicion and pre- vented its moving. The young man ad- vanced the asking price to s6,5o0 and sold at s6.25o what had been several times turned down at s5,o00.
 'The psychology of the negro and ele $ shoes and the residence seekers and the 5000 home seems on a parallel"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1920-05-04
Need $5O,0O0 to
 Complete Warrior Job

G7N HE Port of Birmingham Corpo-
 q ration, which is nearing the completion of the city's river termi- nals at Birmingport on the Warrior, lis going to ask citizens of Birming- /, ham who have not yet lined up in that community cause, to subscribe about fifty thousand dollars, the amount required to place the termi- nals in finished working order and ito enable the full realization of Bir- mingham's dream of freight rate ad- vantages.
 Little besides this is to be done, but this much must be done by Bir- mingham. and it is not fair that the few who have already done more than their share should do it all. At Mon days meeting the Port of Bir- mingham stockholders, after they had heard the reports of the work accomplished at Birmingport and the clear freight rate advantages arising out of use of the river had been shown, doubled their subscriptions Cold -blooded business men they are, but not too -blooded to appre- ciate what the canalized and equipped Warrior means to them, to Birming- ham and to contiguous territory.
 It was shown that one subscriber to the capital stock had saved three thousand dollars in freight charges On one upstream shipment of four thousand tons, or three-fourths the amount of his subscription. What the Warrior means to that man it means to all other shippers, and what it means to shippers it means to every man, woman and child in Bir- mingham.
 The Port of Birmingham commit tees, who will make an early canvass for the needed fifty thousand dollars, expect to raise that amount in two hours. No more time should be re- quired He who is so unappreciative of plain fact as not to understand the worth of the Warrior at this stage of its outstanding and proven merit, should be considered impossible. Bir- mingham has few such persons with in her borders.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1920-05-04
Nesbitt's New Word

W. D. Nesbitt, president of the state board of control and economy, and War rior river captain, has discovered new word. At least he has discovered the man who discovered the word. The word is "peptomst,' evidently derived from pep MT. Nesbitt, talking to War ror river folk on Monday, said:
 "A recent writer has declared that ' men are subject to classification under three heads: optimist, pessirnist and pep tomist. The optimist, he says, is one who finds everything going right ana decries effort at making them better. The pessimist is the fellow who believes everything is destined to the 'demntion bow-wows' and surrenders to the inevi- table, as he conceives it. The peptomist is he who sees opportunity, grabs it and goes to work making use of it. The Warrior river more than justifies tho peptomist"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1920-05-04
Court Denies Rehearing of
 Steel Corporation Suit

TIT HE supreme courts refusal to
 ~ grant the government re- hearing of the antitrust suit against the United States Steel Corporation is viewed with satisfaction in the Bir- mingham district, where the company has spent millions of dollars in de- veloping it's plants.
 The suit was decided in favor of the Steel Corporation after prolonged litigation which kept the affairs of the company unsettled, held up it's plans for future expansion and was felt particularly in Birmingham. The acquisition of the Tennesse. Company by the Steel Corporation gave tre- mendous impetus to the growth of this district. It was the beginning of new era in our industrial history and dissolution of the corporation would have been a disastrous blow to Birmingham, anticipating the expend- iture of huge sums here as soon as the case was ended. These expecta- tions have not been disappointed.
 The Steel Corporation won it's suit on equitable grounds and was clear ly shown not to be a combination in restraint of trade, in the scnee of be- ing a "trust."
The Birmingham age-herald., 1920-05-04
SOURCE OF sOLoMoN's GOLD

From the Detroit News.
 "The Great Zimbabwe" ruins of Rho- desia are the principal structures of the land said to be Ophir, mentioned in the Bible as the place from which Solomon obtained the gold for the building of the Temple.
 The interior of the Zimbabwe is iaby rinthine. A long, narrow passage lead- ing from the main entrance to portion containing a conical tower is so narrow Fl some parts that two persons cannot walk abreast On either side rise the stupendous granite walls thirty feet high. The valley between the clip tical ruin and a hill fortress Is a mass of ruins. and contains at least ten re- mains of elliptical buildings and curi- ous enclosure divided into several chambers at different levels.
 The hill fortress is of great strength, being about 500 feet high. On one side there is precipice and on the only accessible side wall of massive thick ness decorated with succession Of small towers three feet in diameter, alternating with tall monoliths.
 In the course of excavation work soapstone birds. gold wire. bangles. speciments of pottery, goldsmiths' tools and many other interesting relics have been found. In 1899 a soapstone cylin- der ornamented with rosettes was found and considered to be undoubtedly of one found at the Temple of Paphos. in Cyprus.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1920-05-04
LaYge Pipe Shipments
 To the Pacific Coast

M NE of the most significant " movements of Alabama products far afield is now being duplicated at Mobile, where three thousand tons of gas and water pipe manufactured by the United States Cast Iron Pipe Company in it's Anniston, Bessemer, and Birmingham plants, shipped to Mobile by rail, are loading there on a vessel of the emergency fleet cor poration for Los Angeles and San Francisco via the Panama canal. Por- tions of the cargo are for these cities and other portions are for inland Cal ifornia points.
 Ships were allocated to Mobile for this system of transportation, which it is proposed to make permanent with monthly sailings. The voyage between Mobile and the coast con- sumes two weeks, which is not more than would be required for an average transcontinental rail movement. Ship ments of canned goods and other Cal ifornia products are expected to bal ance the westbound movement
 The shipment of pipe from Mobile is not an experiment, but is based on exact calculation of comparative cost of transportation. When Bir- mingport is equipped with its perma-
The Birmingham age-herald., 1920-05-04
CHORUS FROM LINCOLN

By John Drinkwater. You who have gone gathering Cornflowers and meadowsweet. Heard the hazels Elancing down
 On september eyes. Seen the homeward rocks on wing Over fields of golden wheat, All the silver cups that crown
 Water-lily leaves;
 You who know the tenderness
 Of old men at eve-tide. Coming from the hecgerows,
 Coming from the blow. And the wandering raress
 Of winds upon the woodside, When the crying waffle goes
 Underneath the bough: You who mark the flowing
 Of sap upon the May-time, Anc the waters yelling
 From the watershed You who count the growing Of harvest and haytime. Knowing these the telling
 Of your daily bread Yor who cherish courtesy
 With your fellows at your gate. And about your hea sJhstone sit
 Under lcve's decrees |
 Speaking with YOU soon or late. Kirsmen. what Is mother-wit
 But the light of these? Knowing these what is there moro For learning in your little yearsf Are not these all gospels bright Shining on your day? How then shall vou- hearts be sor' With envy and her brood of fears How forget the words of light From the mountain way . Blessed are the me-ciful Does not every threshold seet Meadows and the flssht of birds For compassion still? Blessed are the merciful Are we pilgrims vet to speak Out of Olivet the words
 Of knowledge and good wulf
The Birmingham age-herald., 1920-05-04
Spread. Disease

'In spite of the campaign which has been going on for years against the spread of tuberculosis, said Il. Key Milner, there is still in many m stances, even among those who should know better. a fragrant violation not only of the simple laws of health. but of the respect which should rule in the ordinary courtesies of lifes There are laws against splitting in public places, in street cars and even on the sidewalks, but time after time l have known men who, without thinking, have been guilty of putting their feet on ones desk. I realize the right of Americans to elevate their feet in order to be comfortable, but surely this right should be abridged when he comes into another mans office
The Birmingham age-herald., 1920-05-04
UNsOPHIsTICATED

From the Dallas News.
 And our position s,mply is tha. a movie actress who has been married only twice has got the right to pose as an ingenue.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1920-05-04
ToMoRRow,s ANOTHER DAY

From the Montgomery Advertiser
 Frank Munsey says that if the pa pers don't watch their presses there won't be any wood pulp left in the world in twenty-five years. Frank is no doubt right. but he is not at all impressive. Nobody can impress peo- pie by warning them of disasters to Cnma year after next
The Birmingham age-herald., 1920-05-04
PRESENT STATUS OF CATS

From the Tampa Tribune.
 The Pensacola Journal says there was never a time when Catts was in such disrepute as today. He's worse than that. He's what the old consta-
The Birmingham age-herald., 1920-05-04


 As an illustration O: what is re- qulred nowadays to slake g seagoing thirst, the ship has been stocked with two hundred thousand gallons of lic GOT, sixty thousand gallons of ch~n pagne and eighty thousand gal Ions of other wines. With such fa- cilisies at hand to while away the ted:lm of travel, when La France reaches New York some of her pas sengers may see two Statues of Lib erty instead of one
 A Vermont woman says the Provi- dence Journal. was fined s25 "becadse she carried a bottle of homebrew in .. bag with her cat" If it was mere ly intended to provide cat-nip the fino was excessive
 A decree forbidding the importation Into France of American motion pie ture films is called restriction against laughter and enjoyment" by French movie fans. That's a compli- ment for c. Chaplin and R. Arbuckle,
 # < #
 Ohio school teachers blame the war for the increase of smoking among schoolboys. The war has been blamed for nearly everything except the fail- ure of Amundsen to reach the north pole.
 The Cincinnati Enquirer discusses Thinking in Wider Orbs" The trou- ble with great many people is that they think in circles and soon get back to where they started.
 * # #
 Senator Conner. who evidently went 10 Washington with the intention of the Senate sit up and take Lotice. has succeeded. as any cotton speculator will bear witness.
 # # +
 "One of the finest things in the world is to know when to mind your own business" True enough, but if I rracticed what would become of the uplift?
 Yet fhAre in tory of this country when clerk employed in small town owned his i ome and reared a family of rosy on $50 month
 # x x Chicago barbers are charging 75 cents for a haircut. which may eventually result in Chicagoans going about look ing like musicians
 # # +
 Annette Kellermann has bought kome in Santa Monica. Cal. probably with the object of using the Pacific ocean as a swimming tank.
 # # #
 The efforts of Joe Bailey to dis credit the Wilson administration in Texas seem to have reacted with con- siderable force on Joseph
 x * #
 Furthermore overalls stand up re- well undcr the wear and tear of pressing club.
 * x #
 Freedom shrieked when Kosciusko fell" but laughs gleefully every time the Poles swat the bolsheviks.
 # < #
 I.ondoners have not entirely recov- cred from the war. Scruhwomen re- fuse to clean the German embassy. An eclipse of the moon did not ap- preciably reduce the output of moon slime" in moist Alabama. The mantle of Roosevelt" is trifIe large for Hiram and is extreme ly loose on Leonard Wood
 * * #
 myself dHl d sinner. says vice President Marshall. Perhaps, but why F reclaim it in the market place?
 s # <
 Those Sim Fein hunger strikers show a contempt for the "spud" that Is foreign to the Irisb nature.
 # # +
 Maybe by the time the earth gets too cold for human habitation we will
The Birmingham age-herald., 1920-05-04
Spring Cars

"One activity that is reaping the benefits of the coming of spring is the automobile business" says Arthur Whetstone Every person who owns car tries to get out in this fine weather for trips to the country. The sale of tires has increased and also the sale of gasoline. Every car owner is having his car overhauled to stand long trips in the country.
 Garage owners are receiving nu- merous requests for information about the condition of roads and the routes to different places of interest around Birmingham. Many people are plan ming to take their vacation in an auto mobile this year.
 There are a number of tourists passing through the city, with their tents and camp utensils piled in the cars. One passed through recently with an Ohio license. and the owner stated that he was on his way to Cali fornia, through Texas and other south western states.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1920-05-04
ANOTHER VICTIM

ANOTHER VICTIM "A new patient rived this morn ing"
 What's his troublc7" "Overconfidence" q don't understand "A ouija board told him he was rich and he began to scatter checks a round.'
The Birmingham age-herald., 1920-05-04
FRITZ THINKS OTHERWISE

From the ,Indianapo'iS Star.
 The rest of Europe may regard America as race of ouitters. as Ray mond B. Fosdick asserts. but Ger many is not saying anything along that line.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1920-05-04
Mobilize Our. Brooms
 and ScrubbinI Brushes

WhMITH the united support of all
 w five departments of the city government, "Clean Up Week." which began Monday, should be the most successful campaign against dirt Birmingham has ever experienced.
 No citizen worthy the name will require more than hint to make his premises shine and see that his neigh hor does likewise. Soap. water and paint are great rejuvenators. Soap and water will suffice for personal cleanliness, but paint is needed to add finishing touch to homes, fences and outbuildings.
 The "smoke of prosperity" makes it perhaps more difficult to keep Bir- mingham sqick and span than other towns, lacking great coal, iron and steel industries While a smudge r.i2y be honestly acqu- ed and be in itself mark of r:oG,ess, it should not be permitted to remain on the tip of ones nose indefinitely. Neither should we rest content under the ac- ccumulated grime that settles on resi- dences, business houses and public buildings. And there is no place in a well ordered community for trash and debris.
 A clean city is pleasing to the eye, hut better still, it is healthful city. If the people of Birmingham, men, women and children, will roll up their sleeves and tackle the task with the enthusiasm shown when we were rais- ing millions in war "drives," the ubiquitous germ will die in disgust land Birmingham, through all its length and breadth, will be better, a more beautiful and happier city in which to live.
 # # <
 No Need to Wish Bon Voyage To Passengers of La France 7HH HE liner La France, en route to
 0 America when last heard from, is bringing to these parched shores three times as much alcohol as it ever carried on previous trips. Slime of the stecrage accommodations have been converted into storerooms for the kind of refreshments the Ameri- can people may still read about, but seldom see.
 According to La Frances stewards, drinking on ocean liners is four times what it used to be when citizen of these United Stnes did not forsake his native land in quest of the cock tail, the gin rickey and the highball. The owners of La France are deter mined that no passenger or board
The Birmingham age-herald., 1920-05-04
CONTEMPLATING A RAISE

CONTEMPLATING A RAISE
 You say your landlord Is not 'hard- boiled'?"
 Not yet" replied the tenant, but I frequently see him doing a little figuring on the back of an envelope and I fear that by the time my lease expires he'll be in the same class with a twenty minute egg.'
The Birmingham age-herald., 1920-05-04
ADRIFT WITH THE TIMES

WHAT HAPPENED TO DAMRoscH
 "A celebrated conductor says tiSS day of the artistic temperament' is' over"
 'Well?'
 But an equally celebrated prima donna made him wait an hour for her to rehearse and then failed to show up. So it seems to me the artistic temperament is still in flower"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1920-05-04
LOGICAL INFERENCE

LUGICAI INFERENCE The orator of the evening announced when he began to talk that he would not descend to personalities" ''But he abused the opposition cam didate for an hour"
 Maybe he meant that in his case 1t was not a descent"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1920-05-04

man who fled to the marshes: "In
 swampum, up stumpo, non-comeatem."
The Birmingham age-herald., 1920-05-04
ON THE GO

ON THE GO Mrs Calder says if housing condi- tions don't improve ahe may have to live in her motor car"
 That would be the obvious thing to do," replied Mrs. Snipperton. ''ShA practically lives in it now"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1920-05-04

RARE Most happy is that little town No matter what it may be named, To which the census figures give More population than 1t claimed. say most happy" but will add. Fen though 1t may appear unkind, A town that's so conservative It might be rather hard to find.
 PAUL COOK.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1920-05-04

SPRING STYLES Well. it seems there were no May Day disturbances in this country" Only the sartorial kind" Yes"
 T saw a great many young men wearing green suits, striped caps and chocolate colored shoes with bilious tops"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1920-05-04

A DEATH BLOW TO POEsY cannot sing the old songs,
 Those songs so. full of cheer, With which l used to usher In
 The springtime O the year. With due observance of the buds
 And skies of cloudless blue And rippling streams that seaward The lovely valleys through. cannot sing the meadows green,
 The fauna and the flora. Because, you see old H. c. l..
 Has captured angora.
 DENIED THEIR OPPORTUNITY
 What are those chorus girls talk ing about?"
 "The shortage of production"
 What do they know about eco nomicsT
 They are discussing the show in- dustry. It seems there are not enough shows being produced to give tal- ented members of the chorus a chance to reach stardom."
The Birmingham age-herald., 1920-05-04

'Tis the times plague, when madmen
 Iead the blind. king Lear.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1920-05-04
Washington Bureau. 500 Davidson

TELEPHONE Hell (private exchange c0nnecuhs nlI departmental Main 49OO.