New-York tribune., 1920-04-28
THE MODERN JOsHUAs

The old solar systems a terrible bore,
So, for q change, let's call three
o'clock four.
bother and care
More things to put silver threads into
it's hair;
The old style is orderly-give it
knock!
Alter the clock, brother7alter the
clock!
Forward, go forward, go any old way!
We are so sick of the old-fashioned
day;
Can't we drop some of it? o that
we could
Take a few hours and just lose them
for good!
Time is a fiction; so come, let us fling
A bliy big monkey wrench into the
thing;
Come, let us bash in its face with a
Alter the clock, brother-alter the
clock,
Tired of what's sensible, regular, sane,
We turn to the freakish with might
and with main.
Many a good stroke of work has been
BY timepieces set to accord with the
sun;
Hence, we must loudly and wildly
insist
On giving that method bit of twist.
Join the time thinkers now running
amock:
Alter the clock, brother-altcr the
clock
Truly, the nation defeated us once,
But that can't stop us and our little
stunts.
Truly, large classes of citizens find
Our whimsies a pest of the pcskiest
kind;
But if we gain our ilusory point,
Why should we care what is thrown
out of joint?
Be to all reasoning deaf as a block;
After the clock, brother-altcr the
clock. G. S. B.
The myth of Editorial Solidarity, re-
Gently spoken of by Bill Hard, is not
one of this departments supcrstitions.
Frequently we disagree utterly with
the expressed policies of a contrib; and
we are Daylight Saver no matter what
G. s. B. says.
Germany's indemnity, according to yes
terdays rumors, will be 22 billions
Probably the Allies are waiting to find
out how promptly she pays her bills at
other places where she may have ac
counts.
At the risk of being called a pro-
Teut, we avouch that the American har-
monica is inferior to the German, Our
two best harmonious are German, al
though one of them is the Buffalo Bill
brand.
The interplanetary telephone service
is no better than that prevalent in our
fair city. We devoted most of day
to the attempt to get Mars. and we
didn't even get an excuseitplcase.
Virtue From Necessity
(Martiol 5, AZ
Phil never drinks alone says he.
And Phil says true, say T.
Phil either drinks my private stock
Or else poor Phil is dry
PAN
The world may or may not have for
gotten how to smile, as Signor Nitti
said. We should be satisfied if April
would turn on little of her golden
laughter
it is not only that the world smiles
in the wrong place; it is the wrong peo-
pie who laugh. The proftecrs, for in
stsnce, are constant gigglers; the vic
tins do not smile. "Ha! hal" say the
profiteers. Have you no sense Of
humor?"
Until, of course, a profteer IN neck
wear has his rent raised "Here,v he
says to the landlord, "a jokes a Joke
: 1t IS useless to try to make a svs-
tematic person out Of sloven. as Bart
let's Familiar Quotations SAYS in its
own way. We used to keep our various
securities in a pigeonhoe in an un-
locked desk. Tainted about our care
lessness, we bought Strong Box. And
all yesterday afternoon we souandered
trying-in vain-to find the KEY.
George Christie, managey of agencies
Of the Globe & Rutgers Fire Insurance
Company, announced yesterday morning
that in the afternoon he would sail for
an extended trip in Jersey City.-Jour-
nal of Commerce.
Copyreading continues to nystifv us
The head is Manager Christie Goes
Abroad"
For $l.25 we have bought & cory Of
"Why We Punctuate.' The author, rs
all who telephoned us may want to