davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington times., 1920-09-01
Thoughts Upon the Income Tax

Twenty thousand income taxpayers the tax returns
show, admit receiving $4,000 more year. 49,
To those who their fifty thousand by useful serv.
ice-many dove proffer congratulations.
They not the who begrudge the Government
their share Of it's cost.
They are not the targets of popular dislike
People respect efficiency, is the drones that
make honest workers angry.
Uneained incomes never overtaxed. The Govern
ent could take 100 per cent and society would benefit
Tor then the endowed drones would have work and might
develop latent talents
The quarrel of the TWO million who report incomes Of
less than $4,000 each not with tho fact that earn
more but that any get what they do not earn.
No social plan cqualze incomes And even II thi'
humanity possible tho equality would last For ono
would and another would waste until the old Qaps
would reappear.
But each should havo reasonable chance to qualify to
ahead That just wage for father comfort
able home for mother good schools for the children and
monopolistio entailing Of the common wealth.
you can't find political party sincerely aiming At
those ends, make
The Washington times., 1920-09-01
Another Irish Hero

Has the world ever seen heroic spectacle than
the Irish leaders and people presenting in their
struggle for liberty?
The death that Terrence Mcswiney, Lord Mayor Of
Cork is dying makes the sacrifice Of Nathan Hale
insignificant although it the greatest Fate permitted
Hale to offer his country Hale regretted that he had only
one life to give America circumstances permitting
Terrence Mcswiney give thousand lives to ireland
He is dying by hours, minutes, and seconds On the
scahold it is all over in moment. In McSwineys cell
death wracks him with torture day and night
But there other Irish hearts suffering the agonies
of deaththey watch the fearful ebbing of Mcwnsys life
His beautiful wife, his son, his sister, and all his relatives
asking mercy suggesting an abandonment Of the
ghasy sacrifice await in topor of pain tho message that
will the fight from world Of savage and hypo
critical the dauntless spirit of husband father SON.
brother patriot to join the spirit of Robert Emme and
dozen other martyrs o. British tyranny in Ireland
In the face of this awful spectacle Candidate Cox and
the Democratic party bound to the Wilson English chariot
asking the American people to pledge its power by
Article of the League Of Nations to aid Great Britain
crush such spirit she needs help against any power
which may be brought to the aid of Ireland
The Washington times., 1920-09-01
THE FIRST RAILNOAD.

For the information of your read
ers who asked about the first locomo-
tive or railroad in the United States
submit this:
The "Stroubridge Lion" built in
Stroubridge, England. in 1928. by the
arm of Foster. Rastrick & Co., was
the FIRST locomotive to run on this
continent 1t ran out OF Honesdalc,
Pa. mot Hornsdale, Pal, in 1929, on
the Delaware & Hudson Company's
Railroad. The engineer was Horatio
Allen.
The John Bull. which ran on the
Camden -Amboy line in New Jersey,
was built by George Stevens e. Co. at
Newcastle on Tyne, England. in
1S3O-31, and was shipped from Liver
pool July II, 1881, on the Allegheny,
bound for Philadelphia.
If any of your readers are In doubt
as to the veracity Of this statement,
refer them to the Smithsonian Insti-
tuition. where both of the engines are
at the present time. G. NJ. e.
The Washington times., 1920-09-01
The Licorice Plant.

Tho licorice part OF black Ilcorice
Is derived from Spain, where II 4.
made from the juice OF the plant
and mixed with starch to prevent It
from melting In hot weather. The
licorice. plant is a shrub that attains
a height OF three feet and II grows
wild where it's roots reach tho
water, 1t flourishes especially on
the banks OF the Tigris and Eu-
pirate rivers. Since tho valley of
the Euphrate contained one of the
earliest civilizations in the world,
the probability Is that licorice Is
about the oldest confectlon In the
world, and tho taste which the boys
and girls OF today like so we'll was
enjoyed by the youngsters OF 5000
years ago.
The Washington times., 1920-09-01

young scoundrel who not only
wastes his life gambling, but in
rlsts on having somo one else pay
his wsy7 Why not frighten, him
with the ugly possibilities his fault
would make come true II no one
stood back OF him7
A little cold-blooded common
sonso applied to the top much fam
ly" problem L. very likely to solve
81, Sentiment and weak fear-of un-
plonsantness encourages the trou-
biomakers to go right on with their
destructive work.
A man and his wife are partners.
They form a close corporation--a
unit. Why not make that unity
more important than the demands
or interferences or difficult stand
ards folk who class themselves as
outsiders the minute they take un-
fair advantage of their rights as
family"
The Washington times., 1920-09-01
Beatrice Fairfax
ON
The Family
THIS has been Husbands day

THIS has been "husbands' day"
At least, that's the record of
my mailbag. Letter after
letter has tumbled out from poor.
bewildered young men who aren't
making much of go of marriage.
Ono Of them is being tagged
about by a mother-in -in-law who reads
a. II an alienist ought to see her.
She forced herself along on ,he
honeymoon. She wouldn't stand
for the house which the young hus-
band had bought for his bride.
Not only did she insist on living
with her children" but she also
made a stand for choosing the
abode where she'd mako them
miserable. She opens the groom's
letters. She Is caught spying
through keyholes. She directs the
modus operandi of the household,
from choosing the dinner menu to
insisting on getting hubby's pay
envelope and selecting his new
9vercoat and his wife's dresses.
Dear me! The poor deluded old
woman seems under the impression
that she Is omnipotent. I wonder
why the young husband doesn't call
in q doctor-or the law--or ncve
out, bag and baggage and young
wife. There IL such thing in the
world As taking a stand.
To me there will always be one
word in our language beautiful be-
yond all others. That word Is
MOTHER" But mother means all
that motherhood should stand for.
Love that understands. Love that
forgives and sacrifices. Love that
protects. Vision and devotion are
part of the real mother heart.
The true mother Graves happiness
for the child who Is her immort-
ality. She does not spend her time
depriving her child Of any possible
chance OF happiness. So much Is
sure.
who 10 driving this young husband
to distraction doesn't deserve the
consideration fne folk almost in
evitably offer to motherhood. What
she 10 inviting and ought to get
10 tho summary treatment due to
q cantankerous, interfering old
woman who needs a strong hand
to discipline her.
One OF my "despairing" young
correspondents complains OF
brother whose gambling debts arc
q constant worry to his wife and n
steady drain on his income. An
other can't get on with tho chap
his wife's sister thinks of marry
ing. There's another who IL most
unhappy because the standard by
which his wife's cousins regulate
their nffluent lives 10 constantly
being thrown in his face by n young
wifo who can't sec why no isn't
able to coin money hand over fist
like "other folk"
Dear me--doar mot Why should
folk insist on living In "othor
peoples housesT why measure
existence In terms OF what sono
ono elso has7
How about thinking OF Il for a
change from the point OF view or
what sorao ono oiso-hnsn'tf How
about tho youth the wealthy cou.
sins cannot hope ever to resnin'
Why worry about tho suitor who
may be rejected by sister1 Even "
she marries him, no one insists on
occupying q two-family house or
spending tho summer together,
Why make life miserable over
The Washington times., 1920-09-01
Prickly Pear Pest.

Australia is suffering from a
prickly pear pest, which takes ad-
vantage OF the rivers as a means
of spreading. shoots break OF
from the parent plant growing
along n stream and the part II car
ried downstream to found a new
colony. Thousands OF acres are be-
ing ruined yearly owing TO the raw
ages of this plant and no means
have been discovered of stopping
it's march. Rolling, spraying, and
poisons have proved Intellectual, and
II II hoped that some scientist may
md some commercial use for the
plant.
The Washington times., 1920-09-01
Fooling With Words
We got hold of a little thing by Nj

We got hold Of a little thing by Mr. Alfred Krsymborg
the other day
Mr. Kreymborg is said to be q poet We profess no
great knowledge Of poetry but after reading some OF A
Krsymborg we have TO the conclusion that he should
bs politician.
Mr. Krsymborg has tho faculty Of putting words TO-
gether in the form Of saying something without saying
anything to high degree
We quote:
Il weren't what am
wouldn't b what / am
xiss 'Psnsda Of .;s rssps:sf .sf p D'1'S.SsasS
and my wife wouldn't sy. me
feel Ike roach when she eyes me So
:s: 81: s.sss Ssssss s.:n ~n't Ss as what .A. was.
she wouldn't be what she is ,,
she wouldn't have Sunday as well - weekday
Ss sss turn: se'as ike syd thisf e. whom eye
had di,crmin.ion in their choice of each other
had more discrimination in their choice Of each other
If Mature had had di.4inh.sen .iA
sA:, s..ss ss sss s.: :.. :1 b.; mo % 81 to soa II
.r-ra surely % have gone tn. Browns
,,Srvsss tsS.y = ssas.y Ssss s"as.y- sus%
i,vss viss s:.sss..ss ssssss Sss :sS.sn ssSsss@
T vou,aas ss b sitting ns.-
She telling the about it
what can he tell me about It!
Il looks important. It POUNDS important. Yet it
doesn't say anything.
Politicians will envy N.Y. Kraymborg his rare gift
The Washington times., 1920-09-01
l6| nEARl z5EEHa
ODD SIGNS.

ODD SIGNS.
In Denver recently saw some in
teresting lettering on cafe windows.
On the window to the left OF the
entrance was tom KEEPS THIS
PLACE" while on the other window
was. THIS PLACE KEEPS TOM"
MRS H. A. X.
What's going to become of the
"Apollo Guards" when the price of
that theater goes up September 5,
as I'm told it will?. They'll be hard
to find. JUNE.
When they paved Connecticut ave-
nue. they put up sign. near Cathedral
avenue, reading, $50. Cross Street"
GRoUcHo.
A girl friend of mine tells me she
was out with a cake-eater and no
ticed in the breast pocket Of his
coat what appeared to be a silk hand
kerchief. She pulled it out and it
was a Windsor tie folded to resemble
a silk handkerchief.
' u, NANIMoUS.
Barbara addressed the General:
Shoot, IL you will. this old grey head.
Your bullets can not harm me"
"why?" the General alarmingly in
quired.
II wear Paris garters and no metal
can touch me-" CALC.
A cake-eater know keeps his coat
collar up by attaching q hook from
the coat strap to his stiff collar.
mo.
To NELLA W.: Your poem re-
garding H. and 8. of Friday Is
great compliment to the column
and a catchy bit OF verse. Being
somewhat long, the editor asks
you to send something as good
on any subject, but shorter.
The Washington times., 1920-09-01
THE JNsIDIOUs LIPsTiCK.
a Tragedy
A stylish caker--clothes quite slick;
A pretty girl--a red iipstick.
An auto ride--ouitc a frolio;
A kiss or two-painter's collie.
MAXWELL PEARSON.

COL. GIvADAM T1NK. OF Rock
Creek, recently took his sweetie to
the movies. The scene showed
burning building with the hero dcs-
perateiy clinsing to the window lodge
with one hand while his other arm
was enciroled around the unconscious
heroine. And then the sweet young
thing burst out, ''Oh. why doesn't he
nut both arms around herr" This ex-
plains why a piece was bitten out of
the back OF the seat In front OF where
the colonel was sitting. KUTO.
The Washington times., 1920-09-01
Bugs" Baer
War Memorials.

Ever since the war was supposed
to have ended, artists and soft
skullptors have been steamed up
dizzy over an appropriate memorial
to the big shindig.
These cuckoos are afraid we will
forget the war. The Eighteenth
Amendment and the income tax
make that impossible. One addle
pateriot wants to spend a billion
washers for another Tower OF
Babble. This wouldn't be a re-
minder of the war but of the
League Of Nations.
Another bird who has been dodg-
ing the flying squirrels asks Con-
gress to appropriate, a skillion
smackers for a bridge across the
Atlantic. He makes one concession
to the alienists. He's willing to
build 1t across the parrowest part
OF the fish gymnasium.
Everybody wants to spend money
to remember the war. That's the
wrong slant. The way to make the
war stylish is to stop spending
money.
The soft shelled pateriots want
to remember the war and forget
the soldiers. Why not forget the
war and remember the soldiers?
Instead Of dishing out the United
States Treasury for statue to
General Swivel or Admiral Dry
dock, why not kick forth with
bonus for the boys who stepped
out and lost an arm or leg?
This doesn't mean that the con-
tents OF a pocket will pay for the
contents of a sleeve. But il Is bet
ter than shooting memorial sky
rockets at a sentimental Mars.
The marble statues OF General G.
Washington do not keep the men,
ory OF George green. Put all the
granite statues OF George in the
Delaware and they will sink. George
crossed II.
That's what makes you remember
G.. w.
Put all the statues OF the world
war In the Atlantic and they would
plop down in the whales cellar.
They couldn't cross, but the dough-
boys did.
The best way to remember this
war Ia to turn the Statue OF Lib
erty around so that she faces
America.
Ana turn America around so that
she faces the crippled soldiers.
The Washington times., 1920-09-01
MY GINGHAM GIRL.

MY GINGHAM GIRL.
BY c. B.
I've looked in eyes of blue and gray,
Brown eyes have held me in their sway,
Each pretty smile
Charmed me awhile,
But way back home
Some ones mighty lonesome
That's why some day I'll say;
CHORUS:
NY Bingham Olvl,
/ want you only,
For I'm lonely precious pearl;
You've won my heart
Thro' all the weary miles,
Your simple little dimple smiles,
They seem to haunt me.
To taunt me.
when we're apart
There comes a longing for the shady lanes.
With shadows falling sweet refrain,
OF birds s-calling;
Ny brains are in a whirl
I'll tell the crowd I'm through
And ind n little nest for two
Where I can hide away with you.
My bingham Girl.
The Washington times., 1920-09-01

! gave my seat to lady in oGo
of the Washington-Virginia cars ilc
other day and she actually said.
THANK you It's a long time SIM
that happened to me before.
G. X. NJ, Jr.
There was a little girl
who had q little curl
Risht in the middle Of her forhssd,
Once she wore her stockings rolled down
And all the old ladies called her horrid
pOBBrH l.
lever walk down the street feel
ing like a 800 bill and wishing yer
best girl would come along. when
Just then she turns the corner
dressed In q purity white drsss. with
pee-Gnws all hanging roundf rou
get gawky, your legs feel heavy. and
you les naturally stumble over q
match. That's goat getting, I say.
NUTMEG.
The Washington times., 1920-09-01
NEW YORK CALLING HER.

Uoidie mischievous Goidie,
The powerys calling you,
with your high-prioed frooks,
Those roll-top socks,
And your hair Of golden hue, sr
The time will com. when some mans son
viii probably fall for vsu.
But let me tell you, uoldie,
These words are very true.
You may pull that stun In iittie New YORK,
but wsshinston's no place for you.
Isn't Il awful some fellows have
all the girls and some none7
JR. DRUG CLERK.
The Washington times., 1920-09-01
We TOWNE GOSSIP
u Rsgtstsrsd u. & Patent ofnsA
BY K. G. B.

OF A new arrival.
IN HIS three-room home,
AND THE other day.
HE CALLED me up.
AND WANTED to know.
IF HE might come over.
WITH HIS baby girl.
AND l said he might.
AND HE came along.
AND BEGAN to bras.
ABOUT THE baby;
AND 1T never cried.
AND WAS always good.
AND HE gave it to me.
AND I talked to it.
AND 1T poked my eyes.
AND PULLED my tie.
AND MUsSED my collar.
AND ALL at once.
1T BEGAN to scream.
AND couldn't stop it.
AND GAVE it back.
AND 1T kept on screaming.
AND HE took it home.
AND A little while later
HE TELEGRAPHED.>
"THE KID had your scarfpin.
an IT'S hand.
"AND- WAS pricking its finger"
AND SURE enough.
1T HAD swiped Yy. pin.
| THANK you.
The Washington times., 1920-09-01
LITTLE, BLACK, LONELY.

Hes Just q ragged negro kid;
80 little he's almost HID
by the big trees, and aitho' he's black.
With but half . shirt upon his back,
And pantaloons hung all awry
BY one old gaiius, there's In his eye
So II seems to me, as pass by
n lonely 1eok.
And no I took
A chance and wrote this Hutty verse
I don't know any that could be worse-
Neglected, no wonder his heart II stone.
Whoever stops, close to 18th and 8.
A their car starts up the hill.
To say . kind word to poor little Phil
To brighten. bless.
Should We do lessy
The Washington times., 1920-09-01

FOUR YEARS ago.
WROTE one day.
OF LOSING a pin.
FROM OUT OF my tie.
AND A letter came.
ON A later day.
FROM A prison cell.
IN A nearby place.
AND THE writer said.
If I'd get him out.
AND SHOW him a pin.
THAT I'D like to have.
HE'D REPLACE the pin.
THAT l had lost.
WITH THIS other pin,
AND, OF course, he jeked.
AND I wrote him.
AND 1T came about.
THAT IN a month.
HE WAS on parole.
AND HE went to work.
AT AN honest Job.
AND THEN war came.
AND HE went to war.
AND CAME back home.
AND BACK to work.
AND MARRIED a girl. ..
AND AWHILE ago.
HE WROTE me a note.
The Washington times., 1920-09-01

l went to South America and
stopped there, but was sent home
because I did not go there?
What am 1? s. Il. d.
The Washington times., 1920-09-01

and said: "Quick, give me q mouse
trap. I want to catch a Potomac
Park car" 1t was her only saliva
ton. A. e. H.
The Washington times., 1920-09-01
FREAKS ARE EVERYWHERE.


/ admit that it 10 impolite to stare
SO much on street cars and elsewhere,
but really there are so many freak
nowadays that we forget our man
ners. 1t is Just as good as going 70
q circus to see some of these cake
eaterettes. MRS. +. w. r.
"Razo Joe" wants. to know who
remembers when they yelled "scc5
beer?"
Among Washington musicians
know no one who IL there" witt
more appropriate music for the pie
lures than GEORGE II. EMMONS, at
Loew's Palace. He Is also very popa
lar.
And ROBERT GOTTA. pianist at
thu Riaito, 10 another boy whose sous
is in his finger tips. AL GEREA.
The Washington times., 1920-09-01

Ever since the war was supposed
to have ended, artists and soft
skullptors have been steamed up
dizzy over an appropriate memorial
TO the big shindig.
The Washington times., 1920-09-01

Typewriter picture OF the -Reso-
Lutte" by Eugene Wilkinson.
The Washington times., 1920-09-01

Ana turn America around so that
she faces the crippled soldiers.
The Washington times., 1920-09-01

A cake-eater I know keeps his coat
collar up by attaching q hook from
the coat strap to his stiff collar:
mo.
Gunnison news-champion., 1920-09-24
ABOUT OUR DEMOCRATIC
COUNTY CANDIDATES

SUu that the dust cloud Of the pm
mary election has rolled by. and We
can -sr or candidates, let's pause u
moment and take good look at those
who are 10 carry the Democratic
banner 10 ,Gct0Ty this coming Novcm-
bsT
4 number af the candidates on the
ticket Tor county Offices are nc1S ones,
but some are those who now
hold Office and seek r--clectlun n the
coming election OF the latter II Is
hardly necessary 10 say much hey are
too wcll known and the fact that they
have again been chosen 20 represent
the Democratic party, speaks for =
self 4 vote for any Of them Is n
yot" in the night place
There our popular sherif-Pat
Haulon Every body knows Pat Per
haps that's why there Is 20 little law
breaking IN our county. Eyil-doers
no know Pats ability as a guardian
OF the peace. generally think twice
before starting something in this neck
Of the woods Even in those trouble
some times when most of the state was
torn asundcr with labor conflicts, Gun
nis0n has been singularly free from
such disturbances. When you have
the right man in the right place. why
change? Vote for Hanlon this Nov
cmbcr.
Continued Next Week.
Gunnison news-champion., 1920-09-24

rr carylny Uut any oral agreement
'.4. bee madr "rth nrs fellow lawyers
rr ath The tour, and insisted on the
-amr integrity ur the part Of those
that h. did hl-lr'-. with He at all
times had th" r'p4'a,Ion Of hating
d lr and or.s recently ne made he
statement; ,ha. h" had absolutely re-
fused 20 represent a clcnt whom he
Wa satisfied had r.prcscutcd the
facts 10 him Wal" hr was prunounc-
ed IN hrs opn.un- and .nNstcnt on his
rgh,-. he VA Away agreeable and
consd,-a'" % ht- follow practitioners.
Il will b" long before those who
knew hlm ran realize that his strong
hopeful life Is ended, and that his
sympathetic heart Is stllicd. II may
be- trulhfully SAID that Senator Sapp
has an enduring monum"n; Of loving
memories "n-hr.ned IN the hearts Of
his friends.
Gunnison news-champion., 1920-09-24
o O o o o o o o o o . o o o o
o OHIO CREEK o
o o
0 o OO 900 o OOO o o o o o
News-Champion Correspondence.

Wednesday, September D.
Mrs Lloyd Carpenter went to Canon
City Monday and returned Wednes-
day.
o. +. Wiseman and wife plan 70
start tomorrow in their Nash car for
an overland trip thru the lower val
leys, going first TO Paonia-
Mrs. Archer Miller is eported some
what improved but will remain at the
D. & Z. G. hospital in Salida for
some weeks yet.
Fred Mckee is moving his family
to Gunnison for the winter, so that
Gene and Donald may attend school
They are taking some days for the
removal, as their town residence is
not yet ready.
Ralph Allen and family expect to
start for trip overland to Denver.
Sunday. 1t will not be much like the
trip Ralph took with his parents from
Boulder overland in the nineties, when
they We're many days driving over.
While he was riding along the Ohio
creek road, this week, Dave Easterly's
horse stepped into n praire dog hole
and snapped the bone of his front leg.
Another valuable animal gone be-
cause of the pests. They are trem-
cndously thick along the road oppo-
site the Lehman and Carpenter
ranches and real campaign should
be made in the spring with poisoned
bait to eSterminate them.
School began in Fairview district
this week with Miss Vera Alsdow as
Gunnison news-champion., 1920-09-24
o ooo 600 o o 600 o
o NORMAL SCHOOL NOTES o
n n n n n n n n n n n n n n n

New hampton Correspondence
James Hall is among the students
coming from the Delta vicinity TO
attend school this winter.
Miss Rita Dotts arrived from Delta
SUNDAY evening and registered At the
Normal Monday.
Miss Lucy Spicer came in Saturday
evening from Boise, Idaho, where she
spent her vacation with a sister.
r. George Damson returned Satur-
day from Holland, Michigan. 20 re
sumo his duties at the Normal Col
lcgc.
NJ Eva Carpenter, one Of the Nor
ma faculty., returned Sunday from
PUu and. Oregon, where she spent a
month vacation.
81 katherine FIrebaugh. popular
dramatic teacher at the Normal Col
lege. who was absent last year, arriv-
ed Saturday 10 once more take up her
duIfrs At our institution.
Work will be started next week on
band bungalow" which will be
buIl' back OF the Normal school. The
building will be 2Ox30 feet, and will
be u-ed for music rooms in which to
teach music and will be a meeting
rI,-. Fy, tho bapA ,pJ ,rrb.s.ra