The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1920-03-20
ON SECOND THOUGHT
By JAY z. HOUSE.
(From Philadelphia Public Ledssr.)

We trust our editorial coadjutor, the
Hon. William Howard Taft, will not
take it unkindly IL we promote his
latest quip in the column. The nature
of the Hon. Mr. Tafts lucubrations IS
such that he cannot use it in his. Mr..
Taft says. and we can almost hear his
chuckle as the quip cascades from his
Hips. he says a gentleman is one who
never hurts anybody's feelings uniu-
tentionally.
Alongside Mr. Tafts neat jspery,
and as a sort of companion piece to
it, we wish to lay Doc Douglass's
definition OF a lady. "A lady the
Doc" says; and we don't know where
he got it, lis one who never remem-
bers herself nor forgets anybody else"
Hhere is controversy as to whether
the Bibles placed in hotel rooms by the
well-known and highly esteemed Gid
cons serve in any way to regenerate
hotel guests AS to that we offer, no
opinion. But we should be willing to
lay little at considerable odds that
the Bible in a hotel room saves the
hotel many towels, to say nothing of
pictures, furniture and plumbing.
One must be fortified with morar
oeliQuity in considerable cegree to
possess the courage to purloin a hotel
towel in fun view of a Bible.
You can attract some attention by
being a champion speller, but the fel-
lows who leave it to the stenographer
nave most of the good jobs corraled
1t has been discovered that our svs
tenn OF education makes children wiser
than their parents But, il seems
worth noting in the connection, the
children are no wiser than their par
ents were at their age.
The column frequently has stressed
the point that every man has his dis
.inction. John Klopfer probably in
the only man who ever chewed to-
bacco thirty-one years and then vol
unfairly abandoned the habit.
We note, incidentally. that another
reporter has referred to horse-racing
as the sport of kings. Stripped of its
! physiological verdure, horse-racing is
almost wholly the sport of gentlemen
ambitious to enlarge a shoestring to
A man may be said to be making
progress as soon as he discovers that
the empty soapbox at the corner groc-
cry is mighty poor seat.
Sim Heckle says he is not one of
those who clamor for grand opera in
English. AS a member of the prole-
tariat, Mr.. Heckle holds. with his
kind, that grand opera should be dis
guised in some way;
| Buck Kilby says there is nothing he
cares enough about doing to make
giving IL up in Lent an act of penance.
The newspapers carried a telegraph
story concerning a woman fifty years
old who looked twenty, but the teIe-
graph has been imposed upon. Look
ing twenty years old is one of the
things that cannot be counterfeited
A man enjoys being chased a little
by the women, but he hates to be run
down.
Meanwhile. il you can play third
base up. to the big league standard
and in sensational style, you need not
worry over any competition you may
have to meet from gentlemen whose
names adorn the pages of history
A thin man has a better chance
than a fat one. Women out cunning
for their common enemy occasionally
| puncture a fat man. But few women
shoot well enough to hit a thin one.
Tank Beverly says If the precedent
of shooting a partner who trumps an
ace, recently established in Arkansas.
I becomes an obligation he knows a
woman who hasn't long to live.
| Next to the photographer the cor
! set probably does more for woman
than any other agency working in her
! behalf.
We asked the Chief whether in
view of the white paper shortage. we
should write anything for publication.
He instructed US to go thru the mo-
tions. We have done so.
Our faith in the good taste of the
American people, often at low ebb. has
been temporarily renewed. The heirs
or the late Mark Twain collected
$77. 900 in royalties last year. Mark
Twain was a writing man who had but
one fad-that of smoking in bed And
he did not exploit that in his pub
lished works.