The Ordway new era., 1920-08-27
By HOLWORTHY HALL

/
| plain is that I've made another mis-
take =" After the first great effort
( the words came tunbling. passionate
ly. Unchecked at would have been
so Infinitely better for both OF US II
I'D never met you at all. e. My life
| has been n whole series of mistakes;
this IS the worst. =. The worst.
or course. 1t would be absurdIy sim
4 pie II | were going AWAY from Syria
| cuse. II | were going TO leave you
here, and go-but I'm not. I'm going
to stay here. And | can't think it's
decent not to tell you now that IL you
knew all | know . what I've
| been, what I've done . you wouldn't
| marry me II | We're the last man left
| to ask you. =" He gestured i'm
| patiently. Were chiidishly hopeful
sometimes . . all OF US . hoping
| for what we know is impossible
what We know always will he lmpos-
sible. I've been like that-and
what hoped was that you could take
me on the basis of what I've been
| for the last few months since
| July =. because that's the way take
! myself. just mana man-llke
/ Jack Armstrong. | hoped we could
! simply eliminate the past. and
/ can't ger away from II. It's on my
heels every minute. It's what am.
now . but II went much further
back than that, you and the doctor
would both think just what ! do about
myself and I'd have 10 say good
| by to You anyway just os I'm do
ing tonight. hope you can see that
lin not telling all this to you from any
other motive except to be quite honest
with you. Quite honest-for once. l
care too much about you to let you
live another day without knowing that
| can't go on-it's over. I'm not
fit to be even your friend. That's
all"
She sat motlonless. HIlliard had
turned back to the fireplace.
Were you as bad :. as that?" she
whispered
"once.' he said bitterly. over his
shoulder. 81 used TO be gentleman.
But that was a long time ago"
She raised her head "Nothing
could ever make ME believe" she said
that you haven't always been just as
u
can and nothing will What you may
think about yourself makes no differ
ence to me. l."
DON'T" he said. and his tone was
asonized. Don't you see"
II don't believe you she said stead
lily.
Hilllard's voice was unstable with
his great bitterness of failure. "YOu
Halter me" he said harshly. And be-
Shakespeare wrong"
She was up. and beside him. smiling
bravely into his eyes. and he was fog
ging his Will to keep his hungry arms
| from snatching her. from sweeping her
| close to him. and =.
| What do you think women are?'
she demanded, with sweet imperlous-
ness Nothing but marble statues
or putty ones? Just made TO stand
around and let the world go past.
without having anything to say about
| lit"
He retreated to the wall In self-de-
fense Don't, Don't, I'm the one
who's driven myself into this corner
not you!''
But you don't have to stay In 1t
always, do your
He stared at her in mystificntion.
Don't he silly" she said. and don't
be unreasonable: I'm not - She
touched his sleeve; his expression was
unchanged. Don't make me think you
are unreasonable! she said compass
sIonately. "If you're not satisfied. why
can't you make yourself what you
] bag Ipa nf N
the past, that you can't help. why don't
you think about things you can help?
Living Is about all there is to live for.
isn't III"
He drew In his breath perilously.
"But I'm letting you 60" he said,
daZed.
She stamped her foot In tremulous
severity. mo. you're not; | won't al
low 1t Can't you see why? Do
have TO tell you that? Well e.
because ! want you for friend even
! If you don't want me-
want your lie cried. and remem-
bered himself, and froze to Immoblity.
"Oh-as a friend ~
surely. AS IA friend-what else did
you think | meant?"
The young man shook his head
81 don't know. Only | came up here
to tell you | haven't any right to your
friendship. | emit tell you why &.
haven't as much callOusness as all
that but II | did tell you, your
last atom of faith In me would be
gone And you can't afford to have me
even far frlend-now that I've said
that. can your
Yes" she said stendfastly, 81 can
afford It,"
"When when I've told you
:" His lips were parted in
| au,aza,inasS his eyes rnvpd dullv aI