The Birmingham age-herald., 1920-09-19

opperasion for appendeseetus shrink like a new undershirt in it's furst experience in an ammatoor laundry. He Is the boy with the Bank roll He may have to hire an expurt to help him with his incum tax, but he don't need enny assist ense when it cums down to fixing the per diem for attaching a wind sheel to your barn-not so as you would notise it. The high cost of living has no terrors for him-he's getting his.
 Also in the good old days before the Bone Dry--it was easy to in duce a cultured lady of ample pro- pensions to drop round to your dommisile on Mondays and annoy the family wash; in addision she would skrub the back porch; pol fish the stove; use a little Sapolyo and elbow greese on the bathroom. Then she'd cum back Tuesday and do the iruning; do up the curtains; dust out a few rugs and such uther and sundry services as one could think up all for one and half rum men, and such uther perquisites as mite by laying round not working. Besides this one could have one of hur cuzens who could make. the most deliteful flap jacks; and could prepare ham nuckle and cabbage in such a way that 1t would melt in your mouth-also she would make up the beds and insidentally be cook housemaid, and handy all round help for the muniffisent sum of bones per week and such sun dry groseries as she mite cart away under an apron that could easily do service as a side show tent for a sircus.
 But is it different now? I'll say is. Now if you can induse laun- dress"-they air no Iongur wash ladies--to evven drop in on you long enuff to sprinkle a union suit and squirt rose watur ovver fatigued pair of pajammas it will take hur a couple of days, and then she's all worn out and is hardly abull to carry home hur pay-un1ess it is in large bills. If she did half the work for you that she willing ly performed five yeers ago-extry -reseeving outside hur regular compinsasion an old pair of nook need trousers, or an antique cot tun undervest--I say if she did only half of the extrys of the old days, and charged hur usuel fee which she would--she'd have to. send round truck aftur hur mummy. At that she's not keeping pase with the grosery man; the meet man; the rent man; the coal man; the shoe man; and all the lther memburs of the furm of James bruthers and Yungur. As fast as she gets it, they all take it away frum hur and they all take 1t away frum you--the poor simp whose sallery stands pretty close to the same old figger-in uther words the feller who has got Just enuff educasion to get job and hold it-but not enuff works in his upper story to go into the pyrate bizness on his own hook is the goat He will continew to be sed goat-nuthing can reform him.
 Of corse the polytisians tell us that what we need is ree-adjust- mint. Maybe so-and it's going to take a lot of plain and fansy rec adjusting for us evver to get back wheere the pocketbook of the ordi- nery evvery day boob can be veneered ovver his expense &C., count in mannur that will be at
 
 When the wife of ones boosum, who has shared his joys and his sorrows goes down to the village emporyum and buys an ordinery shurt waste on bargain day for twenty-one bones and 9S sents, which ten yeers ago she would not have worn to a dog fite, l rise to say that sed rec -adjustmint is long ovverdew. When one has worn an overcoat thru thre administrations and then in a momint of weakness summSls up enuff corrage to go into the open market ins an effur: to secure anuther one-trying to put up bluff that he expects rich relasion to croke In the neer future who has intimated that he will remembur him in his will and finds that he can secure per fectly good sixteen dollar overcoat that looks like a horse blanket for only one hundred and sixty two samolions-cash in hand--he feels that rec -adjustmint ought to be just round the corner and the only way to get it soon is profusive use of the well-known guyernmint sanitarium located at Atlanta, Ga. So he returns pasiently back to his job. and is forsed to be contint by wearing his old overcoat which has moor darned phases on it that theere air resurvasions to the leege of nasions.
 Of corse Mistur Eiditur. could go in -finitNn and few uther things presinting the same old story--the point is that we must have rec djustmint-thats what everybody seys--and the man who can furnish us the sed ree-cdjust- mint is the guy we air now seek ing. The only job therefore in