davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Coconino sun., 1920-01-16

floor with a crash loud enough to wake the dead, and there was no splash of water to drown the crash.
 The audience, expecting to hear the splash, and hearing instead the thun- derous impact on the floor, began to laugh. But Joe's nerve, equal to the occasion, silenced them.
 "Heavens;" he shouted, "the waters frozen"
 One of Flagstaff's large em- ployers of labor, said the other day in discussing the interest some men take in their work entrusted with the interest some other men take in watching the hands of the clock move along toward quitting time:
 Sometimes l think it's almost rob- bery for some men to take any wages at all for the utmost service they seem to be able to render"
 Alex. Johnston phones in that last weeks nursery lore," about Jack and Jill, reminds him of Lowell Otis. Roose's famous lines;
 "Jack and Jill went up the hill
 To get pail of water;
 Jill sat down on cactus crown
 My daughter, o, my daughterw
 Mayor Earl Slipher says it's high time to tell about the "meanest wom- an" and give the "meanest man" a rest, acknowledging that all men are mean, nearly all of them meaner and most of them meanest. The mayor starts the ball rolling by telling of woman he saw on bathing beach d few years ago, whose husband had been drowned few minutes before. His body had not yet been recovered. She rushed up to life guard and ex- claimed:
 "Why don't you get out there and do something? It's just too provok- ing! He's got the key to our bath house around his neck and there's no telling how long it will be before can get in there and get my clothes" 1"
 If you want to get "rise" out of A. J. Sullivan, congratulate him on the new show windows he hasn't got yet. The old windows are out, their place taken by wall of boards, while the workmen, shy of cold fingers, have been laying off the job of putting in the new plate glass until the weather is so moderate they can keep warm with out exercise. Mrs. Sullivan is in Call ifornia, visiting, which is the. one con- solation Sully has, as he has to sleep in the store anyhow to be on hand to receive any enterprising night prowler who might deem it an easy matter to break through the window-boarding and get himself new outfit.
 Sully says he's beginning to be- lieve life is just one gosh-darned stall after another.
The Coconino sun., 1920-01-16

Dear c. C.--Yesterday was exam ined for life insurance and, "in contin- uation of and as part of the examin- ation," the medical examiner asked me: Do you use intoxicating liquors to excess?" And I says: "No, Doc; I don't, but if you will tell me where can get some l will" Wasn't that a slicker?-J. M. Clark.
 You bet! But you neglect to state what his answer was. If encouraging, send us after it.
The Coconino sun., 1920-01-16
TIME TO SHUT UP

The club bore was telling one of his adventures in mountain climbing.
 Below us," he said in awe-inspir- ing tones, "yawned the chasm--
 "Pardon my interruption" broke in the club cynic, "but were you talking to the chasm?"
The Coconino sun., 1920-01-16

Three little spirits I've always had; One was good and one was bad, The third was the one that made me
 play
 That was the spirit they've taken
 away.
 That little spirit was full of zip; used to use it as my whip; When l was tired and ready to drop, That little spirit could make me hop. That little spirit made false seem true And every old prospect fair to view; It applauded me, and made me know The boy is clever, and, boy, some
 beau!
 Now skies are black and life is gray, For this little spirit is chased away; And here drift, too tired to be shown How to take Bevo and let it alone.
 Il. D. s.
 "The same old thing goes. Gihs that propose the coming year marry at half price; old maids for nothing Judge Ashdown's adv. in the Sun dance, Wyo., Times.
 Will Marian calls attention to the obligations we are under to him by reason of the fact that he started off the mean man" episodes in this col yum. Will says he also discovered the most practical man, one of whose hands was heavily bandaged because of an injury last summer, and he wiped his nose on the bandage.
 The Lincoln, Neb., Star announces in it's birth notices:
 "Mr. and Mrs. Harold B. CaywOod apartments, girl"
 "Mr. and Mrs. Harold c. Caywood apartments, boy"
 It must have been a very busy day for the Caywoods.
 "Mrs. Andrew Duncan, on Wednes- day, gave birth to triplets, two boys and girl. MT. and Mrs. Duncan are highly respected citizens of Mon- terey."-Nashville, H., Banner.
 How do you mean respected ?" Be- cause of, or in spite of?
 Joe Wilson, in an amateur play, several years ago, had part in which he had to leap into river to escape from wild beast. The stage was so arranged that the river was invisible. Joe was to leap and disappear, strik- ing a soft mattress in the wings, and at the same time a rock was to be dropped in tub of water to create a splash.
 But, though the leap worked all right in rehearsal, on the night of the actual performance it went wrong. Neither mattress nor tub was in place. When Joe jumped he fell eighteen feet and landed on the oak
The Coconino sun., 1920-01-16

Nursery Lore: We are reliably in formed that upon time there was young lady named Muffet, who sat on tuffet, busily engaged in the act of eating prodigious portions of curds and whey. In the very midst of her rerast, it is credibly stated, that an enormous tarantu)a sat down beside her, and that in her surprise she im- mediately took her departure, with such percipitancy that the chronicler of the event made special note of it.. A failure is man who has blund- cred, but is not able to cash in the ex- perience.
 Enjoy what you have; work for what you lack.
 Every man has a favorite motto. Sometimes he holds to it with super stitious steadfastness, never perform ing any act that is in variance with it. Here are the favorite notices of some of our local celebrities:
 Ray Ramsey-The early worm goes fishing.
 F. E. Brooks-It's an i'll wind that makes nobody rubber.
 Jack Herrington--Present company always suspected.
 Dr. Schermann-A stitch in time is worth two in your back.
 Rev. O. s. Baum--There's often a slip after the cup and the lip.
 Prof. o. H. Where wis dom is bliss, 'tis folly to be ignorant.
 Judge J. E. Jones-Many of Cupid's matches are scratched in the divorce court.
 Cyclone Bill" Beck says that he once attended the ceremonies attend ant upon the formal opening of new town in New Mexico and the bestow- ing of name on the same. Abig crowd had gathered from the plains around. Suddenly a voice boomed from the crowd:
 "Mr. Chairman, move we name this here burg old Glory"
 "Why in tarnation do yuh wanter caller that?" demanded the chairman, reaching for his gun.
 Wall" answered the man, "she ain't never goin' to be nuthin' but a flag station"
 Wong Ben Sung, the 13-year-old ward of Wong June, proprietor of the American Laundry, is more adept than most of his older countrymep when it comes to bandying words in English. He is waiting on tables in restaurant here, where Assistant County Attorney Geo. w. Harben oc- casionally eats. The other day, while he was waiting on George, the latter asked:
 "Say, boy, what do you think of the league of nations?"
 "Nigger rations 2" the boy retorted. Guess you no like lat coffee, eh? l bring you black coffee"
The Coconino sun., 1920-01-16
LAYING IN A NEW SUPPLY

Heck-"What's that, a bill for a new dictionary? I thought you had several"
 Peck-"We have, but Mrs. Peck re- quires the latest, as she is often at a loss for words"
The Coconino sun., 1920-01-16
C H F x ER F UL C 1T IR P
(Ry "DEL.")

Mostly those intervals when real idea along and is grabbed of.
The Coconino sun., 1920-01-16

Strayed or Stolen-A Buff Orping- ton hen and rooster. Anyone seeing them notify Mrs. Merle Caris. Mt Pleasant, Mich, News.
 That's what one might call an elope- ment in low life.
The Coconino sun., 1920-01-16

Justice of the Peace R. J. Kidd was performing marriage ceremony not long since.
 "John Blank" he said, "do you take this woman to be-" "Never mind what l take her to be, '' said the prospective groom, sharply. "I'm marvin her even if I'm mistak- en. Go on with the ceremony"
 "l have just read again that old saw that love is blind From personal ob- servation, l would like to assert that love is blind, deal, f,-dumb and crippled; legless, armless and paralytic; has St. Vitus dance and shutters; is an idiot and walks around in circles. Love is the most helplessly irresponsible con- dition within human experience, and there's no cure for it."-Bill Doney's philosophy.
 A friend of our in the east sends us the following epitaph he ran across summer before last in England:
 "In memory of Thomas Thetcher. Grenadier in the North Regt. of Hants Militia, who died of violent fever contracted by drinking Small Beer when hit on the 18th day of May, 1764. Aged 26 Years.
 "In grateful remembrance of whose universal good will towards his Com rades, this Stone is placed here at their expense as small testimony of their regard and concern. "Here lies in peace Hampshire gren-
 adler
 Who caught his death by drinking
 cold beer.
 Soldiers, be wise from this untimely
 fall,
 And when you drink, drink Strong
 or not at all"
 Which proves that a little. drinking is a dangerous thing.
 Here's another epitaph, of man who drank "strong" as advised above:
 "He took a drink of alcohol,
 The kind that's known as wood.
 It killed him and embalmed him,
 And relieved the neighborhood."
 "When a mewl lay back he ears an squint sou'-eas' wid he nor-'wes' eye,'' said Brunette Ike, ruminatively, "dat's good sign fo' all wise men t move ovah back O de haystack an lay low. Try hot dog, Misto Dixon"
 Strayed or Stolen--A Buff Orping- ton hen and rooster. Anyone seeing them notify Mrs. Merle Caris."-Mt Pleasant, Mich, News.
 That's what one might call an elope- ment in low life.
The Coconino sun., 1920-01-16

"When mewl lay back he ears an squint sou'-eas' wid he nor-'wes' eye" said Brunette Ike, ruminatively, "dat's a good sign fo' all wise men t move ovah back O de haystack an lay low. Try hot dog, Misto Dixon."
The Coconino sun., 1920-01-16

A failure is man who has blund- cred, but is not able to cash in the ex- perience.
The Coconino sun., 1920-01-16

Enjoy what you have; work for what you lack.
The Coconino sun., 1920-01-16

"The same old thing goes. Gihs that propose the coming year I marry at half price; old maids for nothing" Judge Ashdown's adv. in the Sun dance, Wyo., Times.
The Chesterfield advertiser. [volume] (Chesterfield C.H., S.C.) 1884-1978, 1920-01-15
MR.. Fl. w. PUSSER'S
AUTOMOBILE STOLEN

Automobile thieves stole the Buick
car from the garage of Mr.. H. w.
Pusser last Saturday night. No clew
upon which to work was left and from
present indications the thieves have
made good escape. However,, the
matter is i'm the hands of the local and
State authorities and there is hope
that they may yet be apprehended and
the car recovered.
The car stood in the unlocked ga
rage at the Pusser residence on East
Main street and indications are that
it was rolled off the premises and
down the incline to the street before
being put under it's own power. The
theft was probably committed be-
tween the hours of 10 and II o'clock
and was not discovered until Sunday
morning, thus giving the thief suffi-
cient time to get well out of the
State before authorities i'm surround
ing towns could be notified. The car
was in fine running condition and
this added to the ease with which it
could be gotten away quickly.
The Chesterfield advertiser. [volume] (Chesterfield C.H., S.C.) 1884-1978, 1920-01-15
MAYOR TROTTI CAPTURES GUN

DR.. l.. Fl. Trotti, our genial Mayor,
had lively tussel few nights ago
with a disorderly negro. In the alb
sence of policeman the Mayor, as
is his custom, decided to take the
offender in custody. He met with
stubborn resistance. During the mix
up the colorcd man reached for his
artillery, but the Doctor was too
quick for him. A well directed blow
from in front in CONJUNCTION with a
trlp-up movement Of the foot sent
the black man sprawling. He was
quickly relieved Of his weapon which
proved to be of 3S calibcr and good
make. The town treasury is now one
pistol and scventy-fvc dollars better
off
The Chesterfield advertiser. [volume] (Chesterfield C.H., S.C.) 1884-1978, 1920-01-15
HONOR ROLL ANGELUS SCHOOL

The following is the Honor Roll for
Angclus School for the month begin
ming Dec. l and ending January 7.
lst Grade: Oscar Snypes.
Advanced 1st Grade: Ruth Long
Ewald Steenc, Louise, j. b., and Cur.
tis Sullivan, Aston Wilkes.
I'd Grade: Lizzie Broom, Allison
Miles, Robert Snypes, Herlcy Sulli.
van.
3D. Grade: Curtis, Nitabel and Ruby
Clark, Summett Wilkes.
4th Grade: Hannah Deese, Blanch
lowers, Minnie Knight, Nellie B.
Long, Lee Wilkes.
5th Grade: Eula Byrd, Ray Clark
Ira and Larry Knight, Mary Lee.
9th Grade: Sydney Clark, Vernon
johnson, Kemp Long.
7th Grade: George Byrd, Alma
lowers, Eva Johnson, David Knight
Sth Grade: Nellie Clark, Carlisle
lowers, Lizzie Johnson, Donald and
Lola Knight.
The Chesterfield advertiser. [volume] (Chesterfield C.H., S.C.) 1884-1978, 1920-01-15
SERGEANT w. A. SELLERS
RECEIVES SERVICE CROSS

Sergeant Will A. Sellers, of Ches-
terfield county, has received his Serv-
ice Cross from the War Department,
for especial bravery in battle. Sergt.
Sellers is the son of Mr.. James Sell
lers and is now living at home on the
Sellers farm.
The particular deed of valor for
which he received the distinction of
the cross consisted Of his attacking,
single handed, d German machine gun
nest, killing the five men in charge
and taking the nest. While fighting
with his command he observed that
many men were being killed by ma
chine gun fire from nest that could
not be reached by direct fire from
our lines. He made detour and APP
preached the nest from the rear. He
observed that there were but two men
operating the gun, so he rushed them,
bayonetting one and shooting the
other. He was then surprised to see
three more Germans come from un-
der cover and make for him. Two of
these he brought down by shooting
and the third, who had closed in ON
him, fell with the bayonct through his
vitals.
The Chesterfield advertiser. [volume] (Chesterfield C.H., S.C.) 1884-1978, 1920-01-15
FRANK MOORE DIES
FROM ACCIDENTAL SHOT

A most distressing tragedy occur
red last Thursday night by which Mr..
Frank Moore was accidentally shot
by his sister, Miss Anna May Moore.
Brother and sister, the son and
daughter of Mr.. A. f. Moore, had
gone from their home at Westfield
Creek, Chesterfield County, to par
ty at McFarlan, N. c., and it was
there that the accidental shooting oc-
cured. In the parlor Of the house at
which number of young people had
collected a large caliber revolver had
been placed on the mantel. Franl;
Moore picked it up and
removed the only cartridge
it contained. He then plav-
fully snapped it, while pointing it at
several of those in the room. Miss
Moore was in the room at the time
He afterward replaced the cartridge
and put the pistol back on the man
tel. In the meantime his sister had
left the room. She returned shortly
and thinking the weapon was not
loaded jokingly pointed it at her
brother and pulled the trigger. The
pistol fired and Frank Moore fell to
the floor, a bullet wound near his
eye. He was taken in an unconsci-
Gus condition to Wadesboro and plac-
ed in the hospital where he remained
until Monday morning when he pass
ed away. The body was brought to
Chesterfield and inferred at Shiloh.
Frank Moore was well known i'm
the Shiloh community where he had
spent good part Of his life. He
was an ex-soldier, having spent Il
year and half in France with the
American Expeditionary Forces. He
was insured in the United States Bu-
reau of War Risk Insurance for So
600 and only Il few weeks ago had
taken out policy on his life for
$4,000 in Chesterfield.
Miss Anna May Moore, who is
8 years of age, has many friends in
this county, all of whom deeply SYM
pathiZe with her in her grief.
AT the funeral Mrs. A. f. Moore,
mother Of the dead young man ,and
Miss Anna May Moore collapsed. Miss
Moore is suffering from mental and
physical breakdown and is under the
care of physicians.
Funeral services were conducted
by Rev. B. j. Guess.
The Chesterfield advertiser. [volume] (Chesterfield C.H., S.C.) 1884-1978, 1920-01-15
NEGRO BOY ROBS
MAIL BOX OF 5000

Tom Little, a negro boy of Is, i,
an inmate of the county Jail pending
action by the Federal authorities. He
will answer to charge Of robbinp
the United States mails at the Ches.
terficld post office.
On last Friday while hanging
around the post office he observed
that a certain mail box containing a
large number of letters was not lock.
ed. Watching his opportunity he
emptied the box and departed with
the contents. A short time later he
accosted Messrs. G. l.. Hunley and
II. j. Redfearn and told thm he had
found a money order and inquired if
he could get reward by returning
1T. Mr.. Hunley took the money order
and seeing that it was made payable
TO County Treasurer j. A. Welsh, told
Little he would return it to the owner
and get the reward if any was FORTH
coming. When Mr.. Welsh was hand
ed the order he noted by the date
that 1T must have come in the morn
ing mail, which he had not taken from
the post office. Hurrying to the post
Office he found his mail box empty,
AT this time of year Mr.. Welsh usu-
ally receives several dozen letters
daily, the majority of them contain
f.,x ~.,f,,
money orders. He thereupon started
post haste in search of the negro boy
who had found" the money order.
Approaching Littie's home he saw
the dusky youngster take across the
fields toward another house. He fol-
lowed to this place and again Little
ran, but Mr.. Welsh ran him down and
took him to the court house where he
turned him over to Deputy Sheriff ].
L. Grant, who locked him up. Under
cross examination he confessed to pl-
fcring the mail box and told where
he had hidden some checks. Between
five and six hundred dollars of the
county's money was found under a
log described by Little. The money
was all in the form of checks. Whe-
ther or not all the checks and money
orders stolen were recovered is not
known. One money order payable to
the treasurer was found on East
Main street Friday night.
This is not the first time the Little
boy has been in trouble. Several
months ago he stole bicycle from A.
f. Davis, @butsw gotten off by his
people returning the wheel and max
ing good the damage. He was in jail
about three weeks ago for stealing
money from his grandmother. Upon
returning part of the money and
promising to reform he was released
The Chesterfield advertiser. [volume] (Chesterfield C.H., S.C.) 1884-1978, 1920-01-15
coll WEEVIL MEETING
AT COURT HOUSE

The Boil Weevil Conference called
y Governor Cooper will be held at
he Chesterfield Court House next
tuesday, January 20. Similar meet
Ings have been held in many towns
If the State and will be held in every
county seat before the end of the
winter. Clemson College will supply
a number of experts on the weevil
and other important subjects. Better
methods of farming under present
conditions will be discussed as well
as under weevil conditions. Stock
raising, peanut growing, oil mills and
production will come in for consider
able attention. Mr. w. J. Tiller,
County Demonstration Agent, has re-
ceived number of inquiries from
farmers throughout the county, ask
ing for detailed information regard
ing this meeting To these and many
others Mr.. Tiller is mailing post cards
giving full details and advising every
farmer in the county to attend next
Tuesdays meeting.
The Chesterfield advertiser. [volume] (Chesterfield C.H., S.C.) 1884-1978, 1920-01-15
MIDDENDORF

There will be a minstrel at the
Middcndorf school house, Friday
night, Jan. lG, given by the Jeffer,
son High School.
The Misses Melton, of Chesterfield
spent the week end with their sister,
Miss Pearl Melton.
Mr.. and Mrs. w. r. Johnson very
charmingly entertained a number of
their friends Friday evening.
Rev. Morrison, the new pastor, fill
ed his appointment at Hebron Sunday
afternoon. People of the church are
well pleased with Rev. Morrison.
We regret to lose from our commu-
nifty the family of Mr.. j. b. Sims,
who have moved to Hartsvilc. Mr.
Sims has lived here for number of
years. Also the family of Mr.. l.. N.
Roberts who have moved to Angeus
We welcome to our midst Mrs.
Laura Sullivan who has moved from
the County Home of Chesterfield.
The many friends of Mr.. and Mrs
Warren Johnson are sorry to know
of the illness of their baby boy.
Mr.. j. Henry johnson who recently
underwent very serious operation
at the Baptist Hospital at Columbia
we are glad to know, is at home much
improved.
We are pleased to note the express
sions of some Of the leading people
of our county along the lines of better
roads. From the condition of some
of our roads, the good work should
be started up Immediately and con
tinucd.
The Chesterfield advertiser. [volume] (Chesterfield C.H., S.C.) 1884-1978, 1920-01-15
TWO JUGS OF WHISKEY
ARE FOUND AND LOST

On last Monday morning when Mr..
George w. Eddins repaired to the
| woodpile in the rear of the Bank Of
Chesterfield in search Of fuel with
which to build the daily fire inf his
| Office he was amazed, shocked, thun-
dcrstruck, and, some of his friends
| say, bcfuddlcd to behold at the foot
Of tree in the banks backyard two
jugs, one Of clay and the other of
glass, containing two full gallons Of
the liquid that, while voiceless, has 4
reputation for cheering. George was
| not at first so befuddled that he could
not make sure of the contents of the
| two jugs. They were filled with moon
shine whiskcy. One smell told him
that. Not knowing just how to pro-
ceed and not having any of his
friends present who afterwards told
him what he should have done, Mr..
Eddins carried the two jugs to the
office in the bank and called Sheriff
ID. p. Douglass. The sheriff soon ar
| rived, and, as is required by law,
poured the fiery liquor forth upon
the unapprcciativc earth 1t was
then that Mr. Eddins began to learn
what he should have done.
"Why didn't you let me keep it,
we might have found the owner"
was one suggestion.
Another friend said: what pity
to waste it. Suppose it was for some
sick person."
Several mourncrs, who were in at the
finish, thought it had the smell of be-
ing pretty fair grade of JOY dispen-
ser and all thought it might have
been put to better use than settling
the dust.
The question uppcrmost in most
minds was and is, by whom were the
jugs deposited and for whom? The
next is, why did the person for whom
they were left fail to connect with
them?
To both these questions many an
swers have been conjecturcd, the
most plausible being that he sat
them down and having others out of
which he had imbibcd, thus causing
him to forget or fail to remember or
not to know or care just when or
where he was expected to leave them
for the party who was expected to get
them.
Some of these same questions
have been puzzling the Sheriff anC
Deputy Grant, both of whom woulC
very much like to know from whence
the jag containing jugs came ant
whittier they had been expected to go
The Chesterfield advertiser. [volume] (Chesterfield C.H., S.C.) 1884-1978, 1920-01-15
HONOR ROLL FOR JEFFERSON
GRADED SCHOOL

1st Grade: j. B. Small, Grenda
Mungo, Elaine Thomas, Billy Threat,
Marion Shute.
Advanced lst Grade: Leroy Bird
Ernest Demby, Hasty Demby, Joe
Gregory, Robert Gregory, Pierce Hor-
ton, Cathrine Holly, Bertha Jowett,
John G. Miller, Robert Kirkley.
I'd Grade: Dorenda Threat, Alice
Robertson, Anna Belle Shutc, Geneva
Middleton.
3D. Grade: Emma Blakeney, Mary
Can't, Ellen Miller, Evic Mum, Ruby
Myers, Louise Secgars, Leonard Ra-
ley
4th Grade: Clara Demby, Lucille
Cook, Inez Horton, Joe Bird, Charlie
Stoudemire, Aditme Shute
9Th Grade: Murphy Smith, Eugene
Middleton, James Stoudemire, j. T.
Nicholson, Comfy Middleton, Kathar.
inc Horton, Vivian Hartman, Vida
Smith, Maggie Lee, Myrtle Belk, J
T. lowers, Margaret Shannon, Eliza
beth Holly, Ola Gardner, Rembert
9th Grade: Juanita Blackwell
Horton, Nora Phillips, George
Blackwell, Jack Threat.
Wincy Blakeney, jamie McCaskill
| Lille McCaskill.
7th Grade: Maude Knight, Gladly,
Bird.
9Th Grade: Leroy Sowell.
9th Grade Valeria Gregory, Heller
Seegars, Otie Griffith.