The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1920-12-06
WHY WE DO IT.

We spend our time assembling tOmmyfot1
Why sit before a soulless, cold typewriter.
With fingers idly resting pom its keys,
A CLASSY eyed, despairing looking Brighter
In travail, DER the birth Of one small wheeze.
Why can't we quit and start to raising chickens
instead of writing pine wrapped in rime?
Why can't we sell insurance-why the dickens
Must we be stepped in colyumistic crime?
We're not alone-thanks be!-in our afIiiction.
For other COL conductors feel the same;
They, too at times write truth instead Of fiction
And to a cruel world lay bare their shame
Why do we write colyum? Here's the
answer:
Though Art is long tis hardly ever rash:
And in these hectic costly days a man, sir.
Is apt to do most anything for cash!
1T Is with undoubted sincerity that we
apologize to the editor Of the Sherrard Bulletin
Tin behalf Of the esteemed Argus) for the recent
attempt to extend the boundaries of Rock Is
land county to encompass his village. We
gladly agree with him that The Argus was
slightly mixed on geography" However. ITO
err is human"
The ~Glazial" Period, Y Know, Began
When Glazier Woodwork Installed
@Jewelry" Counters.
There are no diamond mines in ILL
nois, but diamonds Of considerable value
have been found in the sate These
facts are brought out in q 3O0-page vol
ume by Prof A. r. Crook chief OF the
state museum. Prof Crook explains
that they were brought to Illinois by
the GLACIERS during the glazial period.
did you know" inquiries E. F.. that DR..
A. Ford Carr lives in Chicago" Well, we
seem to recall that he has already been given
a place in B. L. Us Academy Of Immortals.
E. F.. however believes 1t only fair to DR..
Carr to say that he is NOT flivver.
Moral: Don't Sass Your Wife.
(Rapatee Corr, Galesburg Republican
Register).
Uncle Jack Swadley and wife cele-
brated their golden wedding. A couple Of
years since. and the suppostion was that
he and Betty were as happy as kittens.
But when uncle Jack came to the bazaar
on last Saturday evening with two
patches below his right eye. Explanations
were demanded by his friends. 1t seems
that while Mr. Swadley was putting
couple OF chickens in coop one of them
clawed him in the face, cutting an ugly
cash. He had to 60 to the doctor and
have it dressed.
WITH an apology for desecrating Christ
mas classic we submit the following lament to
be recited by Chicago hotel keepers Christmas
eve:
Its the night before Christmas-
And look at the house.
Not creature is stirring
Not even q souse!"
READING over the foregoing atrocity the
parody seems 80 obvious that we suspect some.
- late AA<
we're concerned, however. it came to US "un-
wept, unhonored and unsung." Let 1t 60
! likewise.
Changel Yes-Not to Speak Of Few Bales ol
Federal Reserve Notes.
(W ]. Bryan in the Commoner).
The woman vote did not seem to help,
Cox much. but that is no reason for re-
GREETING woman suffrage-the male vote
| did not help much either. Some hope
| for the future can be derived from the
old proverb that credits woman with the
| right to change her mind. To win In
| 1924 We need a large amount Of change.
! LISTEN to Mrs Jake L. Hamon Z moment
Taking care Of children and living in ten
and trying to assist a husband made me ole
and it would make her old. After hav,
grove old she comes along with her beauty
:. She gives her age as 81 when she il
really 80. -. was once young myself bu
as one grows older she grows uglier."
| And there you glimpse the real tragedy
She is old and faded while Clara Smith II
young and beautiful.
| DEAN FRANKLIN Of Evansville celleg,
suggests for high school girls the prayer Lore
keep me from marrying the wrong man."
/, Isn't that asking . lot-svsn Of the Lord!
| r. E.. MIG.