Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1920-08-20
CHAPTER v
Tho Merchant OF Venus


Fifth Inning
In the Midst. of My Drawin's Room
Friend and Etc, Joseph--Joe. am
writin' this underneath the greatest OF
difficulties, because we are doin' nothin'
less than movin' and everything is IN
wildly confusion. Chairs and tables 10
weight champions Is roughin my furni-
ture around the rooms and out into the
street and / gotta keep eye on EN- sos
they won't bust nothin' outside OF inc
usually 5000 worth the dishes and the
like. Jeanne and my baby has ALREADY
gone forth to my new home, but was
left fiat here with the Instructions to
come up with the motor lorries (English
slang for truck. Joe) which Is gonna
try and move us SOS I can see that
nothin' In the line Of house furnisnin's
gets lost, strayed or stolen on the ways,
unless It's me and in that case IL uont
make no difference. It's easily enough
TO replace husband, Joe, but Looey the
Ia antics like our parlor set Is ne rare
as hen with a toothache ana must
be watched like a young infant bauy.
will tell you how Il come to the pass
that am inovin' joe, from my magnih-
Gently apartment up on Riverside's drive
where Grants Tomb and all the well-to
do millionaires lives although of lately
IL amt as exclusively as form'ly. because
family with the unromantical name OF
Smith which got, their. jack outa the
sausages and choice bolognas etc. pro.
fession. is tnkin' the very apartment I
am leavin' behind. The reason ! am
| inovin Ia the same as the reason l can
afford to do II and that's no less than
Jeanne. the luckiest wife in the world
bein' mine
After the worlds series Is all wound
UP and I have covered myself up with
glory, l come back TO New York with
Jeanne to become second Geraldine
N trlN mi fINs T,I@
you remember / told you we had signed
lease with a huge and famously com.
pany which guarantees us almost nearly
as much salary as Colombus wouldst
get now IL he could come to life and
go to work somewheres as a judge OF
| real estate. The lease claims we
| must make at least three pictures a
year and no questions asked and they
somewhat shrewdly and let 'em try and
bust my contract and they will see NOR.
lawyers hve minutes later than the
average judge sees in lifetime-and
We'll. Joe. one of the nrst things
that greets my eyes when we get back to
my fiat is a official communiquc from
the landlord sayin' he wants to see me-
| at my earliest convenience or in the
other words, at once OF course. they
Is only one thing for me to think re.
| garoin' this subject and that is that tho
landlord IL hlled with cravin' to con
/
In the worlds series and probiy he nc
doubt wants me TO accept the hat FIRE,
Tor the next year and can pick my owr
hall boys and etc. I was kinda tirec
or gone to bed, but man like me beit,
in thep ublIc's eye from mornin' tc
night Is under certain obligations to on,
ana all, 80 l went down to tho bas.
ment where the landlord has q otiic,
| without no more further ado.
! am forced to say Joe. that this gu,
aidnt leap up off his chair and try I,
Kiss me. or nothin' like that Instead
rection and says:
rye been expecting to see you 70
the last week Mister Harmon. Hav
you been out of town."
Joe, can you imagine that? Have
been outa town-after what done !,
the worlds series, | bet that guy woul,
trip! e"
one II necessary, SO I give him righ
back his colby nod and says:
What dye mean, have l been out.
town? l been outa town for over
month Don't you ever read tn
papers?"
Not the police court news!" he says
yer What was the trounle?"
greatest Of difficulty. Imagine this her
ig'rant fathead. which amt got nothin
but nine apartment houses on River
sides drive and two on Second avenue
intimidatin' that had been In jail
Are you tryin' to kid me p" I holiers
In terrible rage. why, you old booh
] Just come back from helm the bright
shinin' star Of the worlds series. whicj
you. prob'ly don't even know what tha
is hey? ''''
Worlds series of what?" he sneers
,Parcheesi. you idiotical hick !"
yells. furiously with anger 'If
knowed as little as you do about what,
this and wha's that I'd run for Con
gress and prob'ly get elected I bet the,