The Washington times., 1920-01-17

this was a Lawrence's ave. 1T. car and
you would think when they was only
. vehicles romeing around in a town
as big as Chi why the odds would be
about a million TO 1 that they
wouldn't hit each other. But on this
occasion the long shot win and when
Tegained consciousness and asst for
my car they showed me the chassis
with no more on II than ,Aphroditey
The body and the top and so forth
was all on the st, car going west.
On another occasion ] was out TAX
ing the air on Mich. ay. somewheres
between 8 In the morning and this
time they wasn't nothing else on the
st. but the lamp yosts sticking up In
the middle OF IL but the one at the
intersections OF Mich. and 13 ST. jump
ed right out In front OF me and bit
off a wire wheel. So you see IL isn't
the jams witch causes the danger but
II Is just some piece OF carelessness
like on the part OF the 1T. car or the
lamp post that had their mind on
something else.
Advice 10 Besfnners.
! They's no special advice ! can give
new beginners on how TO avoid these
accidents only TO say use your head
like the fellow l rem ember reading
about in Chi that was driving 1 night
lords I OF those bridges scrost the
river that when they's a boat comeing
through II RACES up in the middle
witch IL spirit open to give the boat
"A chance to go through without
humping its bean.
Well this guy didn't hear the bell
ring or something and he was pretty
near the middle OF the bridge before
he seen that the section he was on
was getting pretty hilly but II was too
late 10 stop himself SO he give her all
the gas she would take and she lept
over the gap and lit on the other sec
ton and then he throwed on the
brakes and stopped before he got TO
the bottom OF the down hill side.
Some OF his friends kind OF hinted
afterwards that when he STEPPED on
the gas going up he ready meant\to
step on the brake witch would or
been kind OF fatal but any way he
got away with the story In the pa
pers Critics may point out that this
guy used his foot instead OF his head
but some peoples brains Is located In
different places tho same as their dis
eases.
One OF the nrst things that the new
beginner should out to do when you
get a hold of your car Is throw lot
of things out Of II like the tools and
the curtains that don't do no good
and just weight the car down and
make il heavier. The curtains is one
OF the best practical jokes connected
with moter life.
Toss Them In River.
II you want TO have the factory put
them up when you first get your ma
chine and then leave them up why
well and good.
People that rides lin the car won't
be able to see none OF the scenery but
IL they been over the Same roads be-
fore why wyhat Is the diherents?
But don't never get the idear that
curtains is going to help you out for
"A emergency like in the case OF a
storm because II the storm don't last
longer than the one Noah was out in,
why you won't get the curtains hung
up till either the sun is shining again
or else it's time to buy q new car.
Houdini might be able to understand
a set Of curtains but II you amt him
why all they will do for you is wear
out your temper.
Finely, they's always a elaborate
Kit Of tools comes with new ma
chine and as said above, the frst
thing TO do with them is toss them
into the FIRST river you drive acrost,
otherwise the hrst garage you take
the car into Is going to get them.
But even IL they didn't what good
are they as the jack will break the
first time you try and change a tire
and the other tools Is no good with
out a Jack and besides IL you use
YOUR head like i advise, why you will
always manage to have your tire
trouble and other trouble In front OF