The Rock Island Argus and daily union. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1920-1923, 1920-10-09

e . e.
|HsRE liEs rsAsis ANCIENT ENEMY,
QUILL CANE.
|sNe pss.sreas rAe uaLoveo evss,
eEwAse!
YE POET COMNUNETH WITH HMSELP.
How now, thou poor brain-weary vaEabond.
Who hast CLOAK Of pessfmism donned.
nestir thyself and spur thy laggard muse
70 struggle from this slough Of deep despond!
What though thy gladstone spirit is cast down.
Or that thy smile is routed by frown?
Though knowest well NO part thou mayest
choose
rach day save that Of harlequin and clown
Thy daily task: to white out a wheeze
The iowbrow and the erudite to please
wellnigh hopeless thing to undertake +. :.
II must be done, else thou'rt piece Of cheese!
"a piece of cheese is right! Likewise mutt!
Some people MAY enjoy our musings but
There's Just one observation we would make:
The bird who writes column is q nutD
IO, u
(numerals, OF courseD has it doped out that
Mayor MacSwiney and his brother h. s.'ers
should be given q vote OF thanks for aiding in
the reduction OF food prices. M. c. F. bases
his deductions. presumably. upon the function
ing OF the ". k. law Of S. and d. We are, how
ever, bit skeptical. We've been on a near
hunger strike for three years.
Great Bunch Of Buddles. What!
From the Monmouth Atlas.
Mr.. and Mrs j. G. Buddy of Chicago,
Mr.. and Mrs. d. A. Buddy. William Buddy
and Misses Lena and motored to this city
Yesterday, and Florence Buddy of Mt.
Pleasant. Iowa. spent the day at the
home of Mr.. and Mrs. Frank Schnurr
THERE were many great battles in the
|, World war which historians, we suppose. will
Gttingly record. But the creates. battle of the
World war is still raging and when it ends
il it ever boswell asseverate the historians
Of the future will have sweet time deciding
who, or what, won. 1t is the Battle Of the
Interpreters Of Article X.
But Mr.. Debs Did Not Learn Discretion Until
! Uncle Sam Go, His Number, Y'KnOw.
tFrom the Dubuque Times-JournaD.
Cox deliberately charged. in one of
his New York speeches, that the Repub-
licans were buying bayonets to overawe
strikers. Can it be possible that he con-
| ing gross falsehoods of an incendiary
| character? Even Debs.. as presidential
candidate is more discreet than Cox.
THE Rock Island Savings bank will take
charge Of your property at your decease and
| according to their ad in the Milan Independent
| conduct up your affairs and settle them" as
| yeur will directs. Well, we'd rather be con.
, Quoted up than down. at that
| MAY we not remind the Milan editor. in his
capscity as a col. conductor that it is net con.
sidered ethical to fitch humorous clippings
from B. L. T.? f'4
| GluttOn for PunishmenN.
From the Port Byron Globe,
| One of the best known examples of
! a much-married man is afforded by Sir
| Gervaise Clifton, the historian of ia
maica. who married seven times, five of
thetbrides being domestic servants from
his own household. His matrimonial
| ventures all turned out happily
OTHER colyum conductors OF greater fame
would allow their modesty to suppress a fhine
like the following. But they receive more con.
lt-ibutions than do we. Just moment while
We turn our back. Now read an
! ACROSTIC TO THE TOMBSTONE.
Prologue:
There's column in The Argus snappy,
Hugely funny oft-times is it: happy
! Ever In quotation; never gappy.
hen how dear to my hearts this incompara
| BILE column,
Oldest of titles for Eiffels of fun
n ay asseverate anything solemn
orders on sacrilege if here's it done?
a.anic you are in discovering errors
I hat journalists make in purveying the new,
~ bfuscating editors. grammar out -darers).
! \ ow for syntactical sinners what terrors.
xtremely horrific, you daily infuse
Epilogue being free verse-very free
approaching license, perhaps)
4 isibility is represented by your first initial
Entertainment is your middle name.
n irth appeared when you commenced breath
ing.
omedy is your twin brother
q ayety goddessed you.
FROM San Jose. Cal. o. D. X. receives a,
Argus mailing sticker addressed to "R c
Snedley, y. W. c. A. Building" Mr.. Smedle
protests. Now, what do you mean Y. w, E
A." he asks. I'm still working with tn
men!" '
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