El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1920-09-23

VurHAT does a reporter think about
w e was q kindly and ven IN
teurioued woman a BIT gray
renorfer Is about the most curious
Individual Of a home talent variety
we have ne must keep company
with kings when necessary ana llEe
At home when he can get there me
-r-fcl-7aver laws his bricks gets his
SO Tor q days work and goes home
The only time a hricklaTer has 20
wear q waite collar IS Wnen ne mar
ries- goes TO q union bail or when ne
dies A reporter has TO wear a clean
one every day and be ready 70 inter
view any sort OF an Individual rom
the president Of the United states
down. and go anywhere, from a re-
vival meeting 90 keno game IN
Has VnrIed Experience.
Thinking. therefore. such as taxes
place within the cerebral couFoluuons
Of a reporter. makes I'D in variety and
Intensity al times what it may lack In
logic and sequence
Let us illustrate by taking exam
pies from the life Of the reporter I
personally know most about as they
are probably typical he gets Up az
2 o'clock or whereabouts iu the morn
ing Opening his eyes, he looks down
across the vast eLpanSe OF bed and
body ar window Out or this win
dow and below it somebody usually
is having trouble with a flivTer or q
Damn that thing" thinks the re-
porter. as he yaWns. Disguised with
the subcouEcious realization that he
must eventually get up
The reporter then looks at the clock
He Thinks II can lie here five min
ures more" lie lies the five minutes
and along comes a train and wakens
him widely. He puts one FOOT on the
floor and Thinks I'm gonna get
Job where I won't have 10 so 10 work
until o'clock and not ar all on holi-
days The other foot hits the floor
in getting ont Of bed so much fuss IS
made shat friend wife wakes up and
lets out a howl about he's husband re-
semblinE a hippopotamus- The re-
porter thinks -I wish I had never
get married 7 wouldn't have 70 work
~ didn't want TO-"
Wakes Uu Neighbour
Reporter goes 70 bath room. turns
on the water. Gets in Slips and
fails and bumps himself pretty badly
This wakes him UP entirely. while
his profanity wakes I'D everybody
else In the building AS he bathes he
thinks how nice 1t would be if he had
a big home with q patio or something
with a pool and a fountain so he
could take little swim
Time files The reporters vie re-
minds him Of this. Reporter thinks
what ne thought once before about
getting married- dauts on under
lle old lady can find time 10 make f
clothes for all cf her women friends j
who haven't sense enough 20 sew but F.
she cant keep mT buttons ou-' Then ]
DE thinks. iu addition. what he .
-louEn- about getting married
Hunts for socks Can't find them /
links as stated above Finds socks. I
bug they have holes in them Thinks /
as above Finally finds pair that viii I
Goes TO basin and washes face. I
" Ire says- "Be sure and wash back .
OF your neck Report thinks as be-
lore about getting married
Finds shirt Needs mendiuEs- Swears.
resi- Of dressing Kisses vie hur-
rle4lE before going ont the door Feels f
ashamed as he goes down the street
ilinEs N ell. SHE'S pretty good ]
roman, alter al- guess I am too
Day starts Wrong.
Comes into the Office Had Thought
DE would work barber than usual F
ags nello 20 telephone girl Gi-
Was up late with beau and so she Is
sore 4 curt reply makes reporter I
think oh go 10 Juarez7
city editor says. Looks like you
would get GO work on time once.
Here are your clippings and assign
7ellIs Reporter IS sore Hurries
lrouEn with work and sneaks out TO
ear q louEhuut and swallow a cup Of
BY noon the reporter perks up.
J tAla good story writes IT, Boss
says us good Puts bT-liue on it.
maybe Thinks ~Ili buy that new
9Eess my vile wants. maybe ] guess
81 Join that lodge and those two
-t-Da Also rnluEs- II get that
sllt o. clothes and that book
Reads paper. first edition. That's
deuce Of note he thinks. as he
eos aloIE lumo plot or a new re-