The Washington times., 1920-04-07

There is. OF course. such a thing
as tustihable jealousy-but IL is rare
In comparison with the varieties for
which there is no excuse. whatever.
Directly or indirectly. these latter
cause more trouble between husband
and wife than any other thing
brought to the attention OF the
| courts.
| Let me cite a few OF the cSm-
moner varieties AZ unjustiiabie jeai-
whether any one of them is propagat-
Ing divorce bugs in your mind.
| First on. are YOU Jealous or the
love your heipmate may retain for
his Tor her) parents? That is a big
newlyweds, and gives the divorce
courts more work than all OF the
| other varieties put together.
| Yet II Is the most unworthy of all
your unworthy thoughts. 1t demands
that husband or wife shall relinquish
the tender affection that is the tap
| root of all love. the very quality that
makes them worthy of marriage and
all that 1t involves.
Thes effort to belittle or destroy
nlial love is a dangerous boomerang.
/ success In sitting mans love as
son Is almost certain to kill his
love as husband. The Same is true
OF wife's affections for her people.
| BegrudEcs Hubby's Time.
Another popular form Of jealousy
lis that which begrudges the time a
husband spends at his office. or q
wife in the pursuit OF innocent pleas
! ures.
How utterly absurd! The husband
| Is down there hustling for the
wherewithal to maintain the home.
purchase the necessities OF life and
few of the luxurles. and probably
to lay aside little reserve for
| emergency.
Isn't the wife who permits herself
to question her husbands right to
labor for their Joint contcntment. now
| and In the future, very .silly-not
| to say insane-woman? Yet there are
| many of them who do that very thing.
And the man who begrudges his
wife some innocent amusements
while he Is away from home--does he
deserve anything better than grass
| widowerhood?
Scarcely less unworthy than those
1.-TWO varieties Is that kind Of green
eyes" which Is forever barking back
to the life of either spouse before
marriage, taking exception to pre-
| nuptial acts which have little or no
bearing on the present.
My advice to welded couples, unless
| some dishonorable act has been COM
| mitted and not acknowledged previ-
| Gus to marriage, is< to "let the dead
| past bury its dead" Nothing but
unhappiness will be CLEANED from
pre-wedded days in order to win some
slight but bitter domestic victory.
Faith In Defense.
There are many other varieties
equally insidious. THE green-eyed
viciousness in his attack-he bites.
scratches, stings, claws. crushes,
| stabs, and otherwise 'manhandles his
victims.
| The greatest defense against him
Is faith in your life partner and in
his or her love for you. Arm your
trust in your spouse with the sword
of true affection and frankness.
Cultivate a trustful, confident frame
Of mind. not a suspicious one. Then
the green-eyed monster will vanish
like the wrath he usually is.
| A recent novel, entitled 'The Five.
Barred Gate" draws attention to a
phase Of married life which has a
most important bearing on the divorce
question.
| The discerning author points out
that a certain time comes in the lives
| of every married pair when they ap-
proach a crisis. In other words, they
are brought face to face with each
others true soul. and are called upon
to decide whether they will go for
ward or turn back.
| In England the span from the altar
to this gate" or crisis, is estimated
at approximately FIVE years-each
year "bar" In the United States
I am led to believe, no such length OF
time is required.
| From one to two years of married
| life usually suffices to bring the
American husband or wife to a full
re ea1ization of what their joint con-
| tract involves. If that realization
does not send one or the other in
search OF a lawyer the chances are
that their union will survive.
| The trouble with so many American
! marriages is that they belong to the
| order Of "leap-before. .you-look.'
Either that or they have been guided
by some motive less worthy than
love - social. financial or sordidly
physical matches, which seldom en-
dure. The "five-barred gate" cannot
be opened by couples fundamentally
unsuited to one another.
Begin Cure Mt Homo.
The cure, or preventive, for this
phase of "divorcitis" must begin in
| the homes of our boys and girls. The
fathers and mothers of young Amer
lea must be brought to a realization
Of the fact that the only foolproof,
bulletproof, ageproof marriages are
those based upon true affection.
Money, prestige, freedom from fur
ther responsibility--each OF these may
rightly be a consideration when
parents discuss the possible marriage
| of their children. But IL any, one OF
them becomes the consideration the
contract Is very likely to turn out
Enthusiastically. II not disastrously.
As soon as children reach an age
of understanding they should be fully
and frankly informed of the obliga
tions OF matrimony. Special stress
should be laid on the length of time