Perth Amboy evening news., 1920-09-02
SUCH IS LIFE
RY o. b. Joyful

hoof.
II is a period of tense and ardent
effort to keep up with the parade In
the forenoon. and with la picnic
party in the aft.
The aching feet, the tired feet. how
they throb, and hurt, and sting!
The feet so happily joyful at the
dawn of day, are the feet so doggone
tired at the end of Labor Day.
They're the feet unused to hikes.
They're the feet, union feet willing
feet. but by heck. they're not in the
hibit of marching so far.
the morning.
But, believe you me there's some
thing oUt of gear with 'em before
they get past the reviewing stand.
Never before did the feet have any
idea city blocks were a mile long,
and the farther you go the longer the
blocks.
Looking into the dim and distant
future you may observe the dawn
of an era in which people may cele-
brate a day without parading.
The first labor parade, points out
Squire Abner Tarpington, happened
when Adam marched out of Eden to
earn a living by the sweat of his
brow.
Did YOU hear about that New York
know-it-all who argues that only 16
persons out of every 100 really work
enough to induce a flow of perspira-
ton? Which doesn't mean that all
of the other 81 live off the sweat pro-
duced by 16.
This wise guy says lat least half
of all human beings live by the sweat
of others brows; included among
these parasites of humanity are all
children and most women"
On the other hand, many a worker
gets a better living because his boss
does hefty thinking, which produces
not at all any sweat upon the brow.
And again, there are times when
the boss thinking does directly lead
Ito the accumulation of perspiration
upon the noble toiler's manly fore
head.
In Winsted Conn.
If you have long been a reader
of newspapers no doubt you have
read under a Winsted, Conn. date
line, queer little whimsical stories
that at first startle and then cause
a wide, wide smile. Little bits OF
stories ingeniously woven copied
from one end of the land to the
other. Stories that steal over the
weary soul with all the so~othfulness
of Gilead's balm"
There, for instance, was the story
lof the bulldog that sat on a setting
of eggs, which had been deserted BY
a discouraged hen:
The story about the cat which
had the hare-lip and that whistled
"Yankee Doodle;
The story about the hen that laid
four eggs a day, two OF them
double-yolked;
The story about the COW thaf
gives ice cream in winter. and thai
other yarn about the COW that wal
so shocked when a Winsted garage
blew up that when the owner milket
her she gave butter-all excited anc
churned up;
The tale about the Winsted wind
storm that blew a sheet of papel
into a typewriter and typed off thu
alphabet backward;
The story of the wild cat that wen
to Sunday school and refused Il
stop;
The classic OF the tu~nneling trout
Pete, who came when one called
him by name:
The story of the sheep tina
"chawed' tobacco and smoked blacl
cigars;
The tale of the whale that ha'
the initials of Goliath carved on It
tale. the whale being so old that i
came apart when taken from tn
water and 'smelled horribly;
The weird story of the Black Min
orca hen, chum of a chef. that lay
an egg in his bed every morninI
at $50. and then cackles to yah
the chef:
And the tale OF the turtles VIII
climb trees around Winsted.
The author of these tales tina
bring laughter and sunshine into
tired world is Lou T. stone, edito
of the Winsted Citizen. a loved an
Exemplary citizen, and practices
philosopher. Winsted. a sign boar
! will tell you. was founded in lit:
but it will also tell o that Lo
Sstone put II on the map.