davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1920-03-18

COLORED HOME MAKERS.
II you.do not own your home de-
sire 20 talk to you personally about tho
splendidiy located homesites in my sub
division OF
LONGVIEW
RIGHT ON the III street car line cx-
tended at 6lst and Dix N. e.
What I may say should interest and
IL may help you. \ visit does not OBJ
ligatc you to buy, but you will learn
about these highly elevated homcsitcs
in a built-up neighborhood of many
attractions. and agreeable terms OF
purchase. Lots from 5000 Tho Office
OF Lcngview at slst street is open from
noon until dark.
T.. p. WEEKS.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1920-03-18
PHONE US IF YOU DO NOT
FIND WHAT YOU WANT IN
THIS LIST.

S0,OUU
7-room and bath homo in tho NORTH
EAST: convenient to cars. This house can
be bought on reasonable terms Near
UNION STATION.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1920-03-18

Price sio,5oo-Nsar 18th and Park road In MI
Pleasant plan OF house that VIII please you: en-
Moor; front and porches hot water heat eeetrc
lights oak noors Paved alley In rear OF lot Posses
sion
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1920-03-18

FOR HOME BARGAINS SEE
us for quick results
N. Il. RYON. CO., Inc.
Main Ss7 itas p y. W
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1920-03-18
FINE LARGE RESIDENCE
On 21st St. Near 2 street N. w.

Exceptionally well constructed home con-
tanning eleven rooms and three baths hot
water heat. gas, electricity. Parlor, recep-
ton hall, dining room. pantry and kitchen
m first moor. This property could not be
duplicated today for 10000. Vacant. Title
now ready.
PRICE, sl5,5Oo.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1920-03-18
COLUMBIA HEIGHTS
A BARGAIN AT S8. 300

large rooms. tile bath. hardwood
noors. reception hall, electricity and
room for garage; only " square west
OF 18th ST.; Possession and reasonable
terms.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1920-03-18

Colonial type homo, 6 rooms and hath:
located right of NEW HAMPSHIRE ave-
nue.; hot-air heat; gas light: Is II. alley
convenient to cars: excellent condition:
reasonable terms
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1920-03-18

II you WANT TO BUY OR SELL REAL
ESTATE talk u over With
n z. MORGAN at o. D. ZANTztN0Bh
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1920-03-18

Price s7.0oo-owner occupying premises will give
possession any time near the soldiers Home one OF
Ing hot-water heat. electr>c lights. and an enususy
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1920-08-13
PADEREWSKl AT THE PIANO
Wei! Called a Gem of Humor-
Gus Composition.

The death recently of Ed II. Smith
recalled the humorous editorials which
made his little newspaper. the ChUla
News. noted The one which FIRST
drew attention to it follows
I'VE heard the Polander. Paderew-
ski. play the piano in Kansas City last
night. The fellow is deceitful. He
makes you think all the time that he
IS going to play a tune, but he never
does. He flirts all around tune. but
never touches it His hair looks like
wig. but 1t isn't. He deceives you
in a hundred ways. He makes the
sweetest sounds you ever heard that
were not tune he has his plane
SO trained that the doggcne thing viii
keep right on playing when he is not
touching it. He reaches out slowly
and strokes it drawing back his e.
bows like man brushing a girls hair.
You see the moonlight and you're
there with your girl, bat somehow she
eon't love you We know the sorrow
Of that, and that's why we don't like
Paderewski. There are troubles
enough In the world without hearing
Paderewskf. A man don't want to
feel like he had thrown the mutilated
rematns Of his grandmother in the
sewer If this is paderewski's last
visit to America we're glad of 1t. But
~e woHldn't take 500 tor what we
heard
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1920-08-13
Honors Remained With Mule.

While a circus parade was in prog
ress at Kane, Pa, one of the elephants,
thinking possibly to relieve the monot-
ony of the occasion, gave its trunk
toss in the air and brought it down
with resounding smack on a mule
that had been standing at the curb
quietly watching the sights, In spite
of the handicap OF being hitched to a
delivery wagon. the mule promptly
wheeled about, took quick aim, and de-
iivered two kicks with lightning swift
ness. The kicks caught the elephant
squarely on the knees. 1t stopped for
an instant. but if it even momentarily
contemplated further interchanges
with the mule it gave up the idea, and
finished the parade with a decided
limp-Phiadelphia Record.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1920-08-13
HAVE ONLY ALLOTTED SPAN
Death OF Trout, Although at Advanced
Age, Disproves Theory Which
Seems Absurd.

An ancient controversy has been re-
7fved by the published story of tbs
death in Dumfriesshire, Scotland. OF
= trout which for 20 years had sur
.iNHd in we'll.
Jne fish was caught In an adjoining
-.'"-aIr-rne River Evan a ,rirutar,
Z the Amman, near MOffat, and wa,
ICED in well formed in a burn al
@cent to d remote railway signal box
few miles north Of Beattock. on the
'9ledCnian main line. The signalmaI
"ho at the time was in charge of the
ittn took n lively interest in the fish
'8 did also variCus engine drivers and
her railway workers on that sector
the line, when intervals permitted
u their visiting the 'aquarum." witt
Is solitary occupant. The trout grad
lally became quite tame and dorile.
lud WAS accuS ;Omed to swim boldly
the edge of the we'll to receive tit
nftc from visitors In the form of worms
# insects suitable to its appetite,
1t is still argued by some authorities
hat unless some accident befalls him
a trout lives on indefinitely.
Opponents of that theory find SUP
oort In the account Of the dea>h Of the
scotch trout for their opinion that all
ISL, even the members of the princely
,"lnted span Of !ife.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1920-08-13
Police Unappreciative of Art.

One of the best stories English the
atrical men tell about Sir Henry II
wing is of an occasion when he was re
hearsing for Don Quixote at the Ly
ceum. The one great difficulty was
to find Don Quixote's horse-sufficient.
ly quaint, starved and aged. His man.
ager, Bran Stoker, at last announced
that he had found one in the provinces
an animal whose ribs could be
counted, whose bones stood out like
hat pegs, and which had a head like
camel. ut is on its way from E1-
ston now" said Bran Stoker. in an
swer to Irving's anxious inquiries.
But the animal never arrived The
man and beast had got as far as Bow
street when the police stopped them.
The horse was ordered to be shot.
and the man was sentenced to a
months Imprisonment for cruelty to
animals.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1920-08-13
LOOKED AS IF He KNEW
Good Reason Why Soldiers Urged
Lieutenant to Take Military Po-
Iiceman's Word for 1t.

a co!ored detachment under q white
lieutenant was making its way through
the shattered territory near Dun-sur
Meuse during the thick Of the Argonne
drive. At a crossroads 1t encountered
a traffic-directing NJ 2. who halted
the column
Sorry. sir" he said to the officer In
charge. You are not allowed up that
road We have information that it &
about to be shelled by the enemy"
The officer carefully examined his
orders. My instructions read differ
emily" he declared 81 cannot be
iieVe that this is the road to be
&hesled. Have you any veritication?"
At this moment a shell burst within
hundred yards tearing up the earth
and sending debris flying in every d.
rection. The entire landscape was OBJ
liberated, and dead silence, broken
only by the crash of falling stones, en-
sued. Then, out of a cloud Of set
Ting dust, arose one faint. terrified
voice:
"Fo' Gawd's sake, Iootenant, please
take de gemmun's word fo' little
Rome Sector.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1920-08-13
NHY HIS SECOND BEST BED
Writer Feels Called On to critici1
Shakespeare for Provision Made
In His Will.

we are indebted to an English l.
i!cation for copy of the last W L I;
testament of the late William Sha
1Teare. In the course Of this ,la.
ment, we observe the following $
'euCe:
81 gyve onto my wief my second hl
ted with the furniture"
We have no desire to find fault WI
me successful poet and dramatiSt
Stratford for this apparent i>.rimina
ton against the Widow Shakespear,
What disposition he made Of his frs
o3St bed is a matter thar is not re
'ealef by the copy of III viii of tn,
versatile author whose last Testament
~ raported in the columns of our ale-'
i.'Gt!on contemporary However. rs.
'i"a't think Mr.. S. showed just the
right spirit in eyveing onto his wief HI.
second best bed. q, why did he ne,
give onto her his first BID. or his te,
potte or his punch. bole with the I'll,
h3stert1yes, or his fAyorytte wigge. o,
Ais safetie razure. ar fountain penne, OF
bicycle-anything. In fact, but his sec
ond best beer
No doubt Mr. Shakespeare had gons
to bed with his boots on many Il Satur
day night in that very second best bed
and get, hallOWed as 1t vas by such
memories. one cannot but feel that the
widow was treated unfairly. Perhaps
WINS folks influenced him As a CO.
writer we have only the highest regar3
and esteem for him. But we don.
think he acted right about friend wief
Thrift Magazine.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1920-08-13

Single combat in various forms sur
wives all over the world and different
peoples have different methods OF
Nhowin heir prowess. In the island
of Trinj ud. for instance. the natives
who spe;lI a mixture of French patolS
and English. call their method "plaT-
ing bos" Oiterally stick fighting),
The stick used, says the Detroit
News, Is about a yard long and usual
ly made from the "puie" tree, a very
hard wood. This is held at each end
diagonally in front of the body. and
the blows are struck by releasing one
hand and striking with either the left
or the right.
In the carnival season bands from
the various districts are made up and
contests take place whenever two
bands meet. The stick men are ex-
traordinarily cleSer at parrying blows,
and an expert will stop a cricket bali
thrown at him.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1920-08-13
WOODSTOCK, VA.
AUG. 81 to SEPT. l.
HAS EYE ONLY FOR DEFECTS
Chronic "knocker' Blind to Any Good
Qualities Prominent in Either
Friend or Enemy.

Inc knocker is common wild an
lmal you have all met He is known
by the loud noise which he makes all
the time, which sounds like the strokes
OF a hammer on an anvil. I never
knew of a place which did not have
az least one confirmed knocker One
10 enough to go around.
Inc knocker seems to be afraid of
oylng from shame If he should ever
De caught saying something good about
person. He knocks the folks he
works with. If you mention a good
tnlng about man, he Is always ready
with his Eyes, but" and then he
starts In with long string of defects
TO offset the good qualities.
This animal has very keen eyes
when he Is locking for defects. but for
good qualities he is stone blind In
nine cases out Of ten he is envious or
jealous, and when one has feeling Of
inIerlor1ty, 1t is much easier to run
down" other people than to lift ones
self up.
many men do It who do not mean
10 90 the harm they cause, but it is
habit they easily get into, and it not
only does harm to other people, but 1t
RODS man himself Of the pleasure he
might get out Of the good things in
other men.
AN astronomer had been looking
through telescope at the sun for sew
erai hours one day, when someone said
to him, what fine day we have had"
really hadn't noticed it." he an
swered, I've been looking for the
spots in the sum-
A man misses all the good things
when he is on the outlook for spots.-
d. u. Luccock in give Minute Shop
Talka"
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1920-08-13
WAS TOO FERvENT
Law Saw More Love Than Re.
Iiglon in Mans Kiss.
Exhaustive Legal Opinion by British
Judge Laid Down Fine Distinction
Between the Salute Amatory
and the Salute Religious.

The islanders of Lewis, the island
in the western Hebrides, off the coast
of Scotland, which is coming so much
into prominence since it's recent pur-
chase by the soap king, Lord Lever
hume, have many quaint customs, one
of which was stril1ingly revealed in
an action for divorce tried in court at
Edinburgh. The story is well told in
the judgment pronounced by Lord
Sands.
The action was at the instance of
Alexander Matheson, fisherman of
Portnaguran, Stornaway, against Mrs.
Isabella Mclean or Matheson, 6 Port
naguran, and against William Camp
bell, merchant, Portnaguran, as CO.
defender. His lordship granted a de-
cree of divorce and found the CO.
defender liable in expenses andf40
damages.
His lordship said he thought it was
proved cHlat, considering their previ-
ously distant relations, there was
remarkable intimacy between defen-
der and codefender. The cOdefender
kissed the defender both when they
were alone and in her house before
her children. This in itself would
have been conclusive had it not been
for one circumstance. The defender
and the codefender were both members
of the UA4tad Free church. There was
evidence that could not be disregarded
that there was a certain practice Of
kissing between communicates, though
in Difference probably to British ideas,
the salutation seemed to pass only be-
tween persons of opposite sexes. The
existence of such a practice seemed
somewhat startling, but his lOrdShip
thought it was explained by the cyl
dence taken in relation to what was q
matter of public knowledge among
those conversant with religious CON
ditions in the highlands.
1t had been the practice for only
mere handful of the adhergnts of the
church to participate in communion. al
though the communion season was a
far more solemn action in the high
lands than in the lowlands.
Since the split in the Free church,
| however, in 1900, the sections which
adhered to the United Free church had
| tended to become much more like their
| brethren in the soul, and thus il man
! ifested itself among other ways in
many younger persons becoming com
| municants. This caused an awkward
| complication rs regarded the kissing
| custom. 1t might be all very we'll for
elderly saints to greet one another
with a chaste oriental salute, but it
was different matter when it came to
Young married women being promiScu-
ously kissed by casual male acquaint-
ances who happened to be fellow COM
| municants. This extension of the Gus
tom was therefore disapproved Of by
| many, but to a certain extent the Gus
tom prevailed. Such being the state
Of matters, the kissing INDUCED in
by the parties to this case had not
| the conclusive character of undue IA
mtliarity.
1t was proved that the codefender did
more than kiss the defender; he also
put his arms around her, fact which
he admitted His lordship felt that re-
Hgtous custom did not justify this e1-
tension of the embrace.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1920-08-13
FOR CHILDREN ONLY
Junior ChautsuqusHs will have
"A Mother Goose Party"

It looks as tho the boys and girls
we've going to have the best Of the good
things on the Chautauqua program this
year. Look what's coming!
The regular Junior Chautauqua meet
ings in the tent in the mornings are
promised as usual, with lots of new
songs, games, and stunts.
And then the last afternoon looks
very much like Childreu's Day when
you glance over the program First;
there will be Jolly Polly-The Chau.
tauqua Clown. At last the children arc
going to get what they have been
wanting for 80 long-a real clown.
They say that jolly Polly will do and
say some of the funniest things you
ever saw. Guess none of the young
STEERS will miss that part of the pro-
gram. 9
And when Miss Elizabeth Roberts
comes ON after jolly Polly they won't
go home either. Miss Roberts knows
ell the songs and reading that the chill.
dren like best. The children will want
her to stay all afternoon until they re-
memDeF WHAT comes next.
"a Mother Goose Party" by the
children themselves Nuf sed! -Ad-
vance reports say that this Junior play
Is the best yet. All the old compan-
ions of the children win be there, and
some surprises too. Jack and Jill, b.
Peep, Little Boy Blue, Humpty
Dumpty, Mary, and yes, her lamb, toos
thsy viii all be there. a
If anybody but child has read this
far there isn't any doubt but that he
win feel he is stu young enough to
ezioy this aftsrnooa-and he Is, too.
WOODSTOCK, VA.
AUG. 81 to SEPT. |.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1920-08-13
Boiling Steel In OIL.

Cincinnati Is one Of six places In the
world where steel is strengthened by
being boiled in Oil. At plant in Car.
thage. steel shaft weighing $1,000
pounds. the largest piece ever subject
ed to the new method. went through
the process of being strengthened. It
was ''hollow bored tumbler shaft'' for
use in dredging gold in California, cost.
ing about $4,000. The great shaft was
first suspended in an upright furnace
until heated to just below the melting
point. A crane then picked it up and
dropped 1t into huge wen Of oil,
where it boiled and sputtered, throwing
out clouds of oily mist.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1920-08-13
Humminu Birds Nest.

Burroughs, in his charming little
book, wake Robin" says it is an
event in ones life to find humming
birds nest. The event happened to
me without any effort on my part.
Looking up from Il seat in the grove,
I saw the ruby-throat drop down on
its nest, like shining emerald from
the clouds; 1t did not pause upon the
edge Of the nest, but dropped imme-
diately upon it. The nest was stu
ated upon an oak twig, and was
about the size Of black-walnut, and
from where sat 1t looked more like
an excrescence than a nest. It was sit
uated in the fork Of two twigs, and
firmly glued at the base to the lower,
but was not fastened to the upper
twig.-Mary Treat in "Home Studies
In Nature"
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1920-08-13
Rapid Transit in Distant Past.

"Sir," said Boswell, or one Of the
minor fry in the service of the oracle
Of Fleet street, forget which-"they
are now busy with scheme of rapid
transit by means of postchaises.'
"AAd the rate Of the acceleration OF
velocityT Queried the other. Il quote
entirely from memory "They talk
SIR, Of twelve miles an hour" Sir
exclaimed the sage, ut would be i'm,
possible; we could not breathe
There" comments the biographel
shat is just the man he was, he could
always lay his finger on the veal
point. They had never thought d
lhat t-Richard Whiteing. In Nanchee
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1920-08-13
Chinese BARRIERS

The Chinese are not accustomed n
tipping the barber. AS a matter of
fact the Chinese barber is very mod
est In his prices, and his patrons can
obtain hair cut, head shave, a face
shave, and In addition have his shoul-
ders and back massaged, all for a sum
total OF less than 5 cents. The straight
razor used by Chinese BARRIERS is a
triangular shaped blade with straight
handle. folding up as does the Amer
ican straight razor. The blades are
made from old rails or any other crude
steel which has outltved it, usefulness
y 1lhee Alrect1ons.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1920-08-13
Puzzle for ArcheoIoulsts.

Archeologists are puzzled by the pre-
historic carving of lion near Vera
Cruz. Efforts have been made to trace
the origin of this little known relic Of
prehistoric America. but have thus
far proved futile. The similarity to
the African lion rather than The noun
tain lion Of this hemiapAeee ~. ao1ea
to tie mvutefx.
Shenandoah herald. [volume] (Woodstock, Va.) 1865-1974, 1920-08-13
One Thino at a Time. Bow.

When a fellow is trying to mobilize
enough courage 10 kiss girl he isn't
Abie - think Of GermA.-Uoledo BaAde
The news scimitar. (Memphis, Tenn.) 1907-1926, 1920-12-27
A Problem.

Mrs, DeniDe. who complained that
her husband had been ridden To- the
police station in the patrol wagon
three times in the past week, while
she had only had one ride in the
past month, must turn green with
envy at the record of Ernest Miller,
OF st. Louis Mo, who has been ar
rested 473 times in the past seven
years, IN average of G. times a year,
or over five times month, and now
has gone UP for eight years for com
plicity in an Interstate shipment
theft last spring.
How the police will miss him They
will feel lost without the old familiar
face to greet them The Judge, too,
will look for one of his old stand
bys, and see nought but an aching
void Police come to have sort of
proprietary interest in these tharac
ters that make So much work for
them Wonder where old Scrub
Mary iS'' quoricd one New York no.
liceman of another. "she has not been
arrested once this week" Ofttimos
the passing Of these poor dercllcts
Is sincerely moururd 10y the sleuths
of the law who are supposed TO he
their enemies, bat are in reality.
thclr protectors. oven from them
selves NOT iufrprrn. t,, H.
The news scimitar. (Memphis, Tenn.) 1907-1926, 1920-12-27

should make marriage a success RI,
theif home is a perpetual -storn,
center. II Is full of strifa .,,s
pickering, and ordinations. and re
examinations, and is a place that one
would flee from as from purka torv
itself The husband and wife are he
ginning to hate each othera The
chllaren never come home az long
as they can stay anywhere else
ana the whole trouble In that
poth the man and the woman are
VICTIMS or the arguing habit. They
nave to go to the mat on every
subject, from. politics to pie and
night II out to the bitter end. Neither
one VIII ever give in. Neither one
VIII ever use any tact in dealing with
the other. Neither one ever con
ciliates the other and tho result Is
That they are running each Others
ilVes, and turning a home that should
De heaven into hell.
or course we all enjoy Expressing
our oplnions, but there are "a cre.r
many times when the pleasure YOU
get out of 1t isn't worth the price,
Not only is 1t true that silence Is
golden, but upon occasions dumb
ness. pays the biggest dividends Of
anything in which we can possibly
invest.
Suppose yonr employer has
made Plunder. Think what you
please about it, but keep YOUR
thoughts to yourself. He lis prob
ably as sore as a boil over his
stupidity, and you won't endear
yourself to him by rubbing II in.
suppose the evil you have propne-
sled does come true. Don't mention
It, or all the people in the world
we hate the chief among them, are
the I-told-youAso's.
NSuppose you have a gift of say
ing sharp and funny things. Don't
use 1t. A laugh is poor pay for the
loss OF friend, and many a woman
cuts the throat Of Dan Cupid with
her tongue People will forgive any
other wrong we do them quicker
than they will being made ridiculous.
Laugh with people and they will
love you. Laugh at them and they
will hate you.
Suppose the members of your fam
lily have their little weaknesses and
faults. Suppose your wife Is grow
ing fat and your husbahd bald
headed. Suppose Mary's dress is UNI
becoming, and John has no taste In
neckties. Just keep silent about
their little eccentricities. The rea-
son most Of us do not enjoy the So
ciety of our families is because they
are the only people on earth who re-
mind us continually Of what poor,
weak, miserable creatures we are. A
little judicious silence would go far
Their than anything else In oiling the
wheels of domestic life.
And why not eliminate argument
from the family circle? Let each in
dividual hold his or her own opinion,
You can reserve the same right for
yourself. Don't say the thing that
is as good to start domestic fight
as a nickle is for a. gingercake. and
you will find that the dove of peace
has taken up its abiding place on
your hearthstone,
Believe me that the things we are
gladdest of afterwards are the things
we might have said, and didn't say.