davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The herald. [volume] (New Orleans, La.) 1905-1953, 1920-12-16
PALACE THEATRE.

Andre and Pools Mystical Girls
will have the honor position on the
Junior Orpheum stage Monday. This
exquisite. mirthful. melOdiOus and
musical act promises TO be real
pleasure. The added attraction
will be a patter and dance act pre-
scented by Billy Mann and Paul Ne
wins.
Miss Belmont. a Goth century girl
of real ability will interpret songs
in the way that the composer in
tended them to be. She will have
Charles Seville for her aCcompa-
The herald. [volume] (New Orleans, La.) 1905-1953, 1920-12-16

JOUS.
Jobs are what everybody is sup
posed to have or to want.
The job a man has is hardly ever
the one he wants, after he has got 1t.
He knows Of another Job that beats
his all hollow.
Another fellow has II.
1t is easier work and pays better,
and the dub who is holding it down
well. how he gets by Is more than any
body can find out.
Must have some kind of pull, he
reckOns.
This job the man has would be all
light If the hours we're different, II
he pay was raised, and II the boss
wasn't unreasonable.
Only last week the boss refused to
AXE this mans advice about some
thing.
StubbOrner'n n mulel
Like to know how that guy got TO
be boss, anyway.
Some fellows have all the luck.
He gets to do the kind Of things he
wants to. II the man had the kind Of
things the boss gets to dO-ah, there
would be the snap!
But catch that boss letting him do
theml The boss knows very we'll II
he let the other fellows do rhnS.
things awhile they'd get hep 10 wha'
a snap he has, aud wouldn't have an,
respect for him at all.
HUH Guess yes.
o well, some people get II mighty
nice, but others have to work.
When an employee says Work with
a capital, he means his own job.
When he says II in lower case. quo
cation marks around II. he means the
snap the other fellow has and thinks
is work-hahl What's he know about
work?
The, permanently unemployed and
unemplOyable are those who cannot be
fitted with a job.
There is something wrong about
every Job they get,
People who are inclined to be frank
about II, think the main objection on
the part of some folks to a Job, is that
there is work connected with 1t.
But OF course this may be wrong.
The herald. [volume] (New Orleans, La.) 1905-1953, 1920-12-16
ELECTROCUTED WHILE AT
WORK,

The sad news of the death of Vic
tor \. NARROW. which occurred in
Portland. Oregon, on Saturday, Nov.
27th. was a great shock to his many
AIgiers friends. Mr. NARROW was
eleCtrocuted during the recent storm
which swept Portland He is sur
yived by his wife. who was Miss
Lizzie Gerrets, of our town, and by
four children.
The herald. [volume] (New Orleans, La.) 1905-1953, 1920-12-16
MANS BEST FRIEND TT

II the pet dog is unhappy, its mas
ter Is the same.
To encounter a mongrel dog Is to
expect sickness In the family.
II Is good luck to have a dog return
after It has been driven away.
It is good luck to be followed by
q dog If 1t comes of its own accord.
II pet dog utters inarticulate
sounds as If trying to speak you will
hear news.
For a strange dog to track up new
ly scrubbed porch is a sign the family
will move soon.
The Indians offered up a small dog
when a child lay sick, supposing the
dog to be the cause.
In ancient Persia II one was dying
a dog was brought In to drive away
the waiting demons.
II a dog dies under your house, 1t
is a sign that you will soon move to
another residence.
It is unlucky for dog to pass be
tween a couple who are going to be
married or between two friends.
When you pick out friend do not
take the man whose dog never wants
to follows him. Also beware of the
man your dog refuses to make friends
with.
II on entering strange house
dog should make much of you, espe-
cially if 1t should lay It's head on your
lap, you are going to meet a man who
will be strong and faithful friend.
II your dog leaves home, as some
dogs have a habit Of doing, you can
make him stay home by placing few
hairs Of the end Of his tail under the
steps at the entrance to your home.
The herald. [volume] (New Orleans, La.) 1905-1953, 1920-12-16
SAWDUST
BY Newton Newklrk.

SAWUUSI
The British bought 100000 pounds
Of American honey in 1918.
There are $4,000 steam locomotives
now operated In the United States.
Los Angeles is now the largest city
In the world west Of the longitude
Of St Louis.
A national radium bank has been
established In New York with a CAPT.
tai Of S375,OO0-consisting Of three
grams of radium salts.
With 6 per cent Of the worlds
population and per cent Of the
worlds land area, the United States
produces: 20 per cent Of the worlds
gold; % per cent Of the worlds
wheat; 40 per cent Of the worlds iron
and steel; 60 per cent Of the worlds
cotton; IS per cent of the worlds
automobiles.
The herald. [volume] (New Orleans, La.) 1905-1953, 1920-12-16
ODD AND INTERESTING

Peasants on the Swiss noun
tains use horns, often as much
as eight feet long. to converse
with one another from dis
lance.
A maidenhair tree planted IN
Kew gardens. London, about
17GO. bore fruit for the first time
toward the end of the last year.
The name INDIAN" vas given
TO the original inhabitants or
America about 1893 by Column
bus. who thought he had reached
India.
Agricultural labOrers are us
ually of excellent physique at
90 years of age, but in many
cases have become middlc~uged
at 40.
The herald. [volume] (New Orleans, La.) 1905-1953, 1920-12-16

1t Is to be regretted that In comic
opera only does the punishment as a
rule fit the crime. 1t would be much
better for the welfare Of the commun-
ity II the idea were borrowed from
comic opera by the law.
The herald. [volume] (New Orleans, La.) 1905-1953, 1920-12-16

The Russian soviet wants to study
the English proletariat It will next
want to examine the American prole-
tariat, but will encounter a consider
able obstacle in the fact that "there
amt no SIGH animal"
The herald. [volume] (New Orleans, La.) 1905-1953, 1920-12-16

In the Hawaiian islands the pine
apple industry has. during the past
few years experienced considerable
development. causing il TO rank sec
ond to that Of sugar. At present there
are about 1000 acres planted with
pineapples.
The herald. [volume] (New Orleans, La.) 1905-1953, 1920-12-16

Nearly G0,0OO women were engaged
in engineering work in England dur
ing the war.
The herald. [volume] (New Orleans, La.) 1905-1953, 1920-12-16

According to the town reports. II
cost the town Of Leicester 5000 to
catch one brOwntail moth last year
but Peter Gibbons, official moth eX-
terminator of Clinton, says that 1t
was worth the money.
The herald. [volume] (New Orleans, La.) 1905-1953, 1920-12-16

Women factory workers In Japan
outnumber the men by over 1,Do,oOO.
The herald. [volume] (New Orleans, La.) 1905-1953, 1920-12-16

Stockholm. ChriStiania, Berlin and
London. in the order named have the
lowest death rates among the Euro
pean cities.
The herald. [volume] (New Orleans, La.) 1905-1953, 1920-12-16
()fAJiin!(hAjiil
STRICKLAND WGlLuEAN,
IN CONFIDENCE.
(Copyright.)

I would not speak IN bitter tone,
But Brown is such a stupid pupil
His collar-button's made OF bone.
And so Is he, from that place up.
The herald. [volume] (New Orleans, La.) 1905-1953, 1920-12-16
STATISTICAL NOTES

Norway has nearly 100000 persons
engaged in agriculture.
The herald. [volume] (New Orleans, La.) 1905-1953, 1920-12-16

Save the pennies. 1t only takes
about 200 of them to make a dollar.
The herald. [volume] (New Orleans, La.) 1905-1953, 1920-12-16

You never can tell. Many a man Is
we'll heeled whose shoes don't indi-
cate II.
The herald. [volume] (New Orleans, La.) 1905-1953, 1920-12-16

The fact that everything is so high
is responsible for most of us being on
our uppers.
Every cloud has a silver lining,
which unfortunately is more than can
be said Of every pocket
Marriage is a lottery" says the
Cynical Bachelor. There is no such
thing as a safety match"
The superfluity Of medical advice is
demonstrated by the doctor telling a
chronic kicker that he needs more ex-
ercise.
There are social distinctions in all
classes. Even the washer-wOman has
to draw the line somewhere.
Hoax-Yes, he makes more money
than he can spend. JoaX-Gee, Some
job Where does he work? HOaX-in
the mint.
The herald. [volume] (New Orleans, La.) 1905-1953, 1920-12-16
GATHERED BRIEFS

It takes an accomplished liar TO tell
the truth with a straight face.
The herald. [volume] (New Orleans, La.) 1905-1953, 1920-12-16

FINNICIN FILOSOFY
If yer find amy throuble low
in other people, use on thin
some av what yer have been
wa-astin' on yersilf.
The herald. [volume] (New Orleans, La.) 1905-1953, 1920-12-16

II your dog leaves home, as some
dogs have a habit Of doing, you can
make him stay home by placing few
hairs Of the end Of his tail under the
steps at the entrance to your home.
The herald. [volume] (New Orleans, La.) 1905-1953, 1920-12-16

II on entering a strange house
dog should make much Of you, espe-
cially if 1t should lay its head on your
lap, you are going to meet a man who
will be a strong and faithful friend.
The Elk Mountain pilot., 1920-04-15
Over ceehetep. Psss

Geo. Espey and Jack Andrews of
the Rainbow garage, arrived Saturday
from Pueblo with two Nash trucks,
one ton and two ton, which they
brought over Cochetopa pass,
They left Salida en- Thursday, ar
riving at Parlin Friday evening. and
on account of huge snow drift there
were compelled to wait until Satur-
day before trying to buck 1t.
Everything went along smooth un-
til they came to the lane east of town
where they encountered mud which 1t
seemed impossible to get through,
being up to the journal of the two
ton truck. Jack stuck with the one
ton truck. but George. who was drag
ging Tom Stevens car in from Parlin,
broke down. butted into him and
pushing one and pulling the other
went through without any trouble.
The two-ton Nash is four wheel
drive, while the other is two wheel
drive.
Mr. Espey advises US that it will be
about ten davs or two weeks before
the Pass will be safe for touring
car to go over
The Elk Mountain pilot., 1920-04-15
PERlsHED IN BLlzzARD

pitiful incident that of a mother and per-
ishng in the blizzard Colorado Springs. At
tempting to make trip of only two mile being stuck in
the and trying to walk to safety they died of either
suffocation cold and found clasped in
others
Such events common that apt to
slider them unavoidable but the facts that following
simple will often life those First of
all do become panic stricken when discover that
apparently lost in blizzard for that matter
anywhere else. Panic kills oftener than anything else
In the of the blizzard unless you extremely
fdent that partly facing the storm will take to safety
simply follow the of the range cattle viz: drift
with the slowly conserving effort trying to keep
moving always with the wind and not walking fast enough
20 tire Few people realize how far they walk
before they either chill through become exhausted
Keeping motion is safety yielding to rest is death
But steady drifting with the practically to
lead a haven of safety.
Every year hundreds of stories of people lost
in the mountains This is absolute folly The mountains
safety All under the that IS is to
down hill and keep going To reach habitations and
safety certain be. The fact that
the hills disposes of the question of being lost long
Remember that when you lose your bearings in the hills
There is Bolshevism the square inch in New
York than to the foot in Russia Peter
Inns tells a Lincoln audience. That makes New York
than Russia by l44 to L. He adds that America
contains Boshevsm to the square foot than
to the square mile That is ratio of 446,o54,OOo
As America with all this Boshevism. is still its feet
and apparently to remain there these stories about
shevism in Russia must be all wrong.-Lncon, Neb,
State Journal.
There a very distinct trend of opinion favorable %
decent candidates for the Presidency the part of both
the republican and democratic parties. So far held
the primaries have given progressive the
of the people Johnson looms infinitely stronger
than any other republican In public faver. While
yet given any marked preference, every
hour shows how dead Palmer is how not to be considered
Bryan is and in fact the pendulum be swinging
towards McAdoo infinitely the strongest and ceanest Of
all q
see election when neither candidate satsfac
tory to Big Biz
The Elk Mountain pilot., 1920-04-15
Catarrh Cannot Be Cured

With LOCAL APPLICATIONS. e they
cannot reach the seat of the disease.
nuepcsd BY Constitutional conditions. and
in order to cure 1t you must take an
internal remedy. Halls Catarrh Aedi-
the blood on the mucous surfaces OF the
System. Halls Catarrh Medicine was
prescribed by one Of the best physicians
posed Of some Of the best tonics known.
combined with some of the best blood
Puriners The perfset comeinst ean.t stion n.S,f 81
cine 10 what produces such wonderful
results in catarrhal conditions Send for
F. j. CHENEY 9 CO.. Props. Toledo. o.
All Dfuggfsts, &c.
Halis Family pills for eonstipafion.
The Elk Mountain pilot., 1920-04-15
NOTICE FOR PUBLIcArION-IsO-
LATED TRACT
PUBLIC LAND SALE
Department Of the Interior

U. S. Land Office at Montrose, Colo
RADIO. March 3, 1920.
NOTICE is hereby given that, as
directed by the Commissioner of the
General Land office. under provisions
of Sec. 2455, R. S., pursuant to the
application of Phillip Jocklich, Serial
No. O1331s, we will offer at public
sale, to the highest bidder, but at not
less than $3.50 per acre, at 2 o'clock
p M. on the Goth day of April, next,
at this office. the following tract OF
land: SWASWA Sec. %, T. 13 S., r.
SO W., Sixth P. M.
The sale will not be kept open. but
will be declared closed when those
present at the hour named have
ceased bidding. The person making
the highest bid will be required to
Immediately pay to the Receiver the
amount thereof.
Any persons claiming adversely the
above-described land are advised to
file their claims, or objections, on or
before the time designated for sale.
o. C. SKINNER. Register
GEO. w. BRUCE, Receiver.
First Pub. March 1S, 1920.
Last Pub. April 10, 1920
Bill heads, letter heads, envelopes.
cards, etc. printed at the Pilot ONCE
The Elk Mountain pilot., 1920-04-15
POSTED PITFALLS

Oh, the garden of girls it fairly
With Blossoms, with Violets, Lilies and Roses,
With Hyacinhs Mgnonettes, Fuchsias and Myrtes,
Its Daisies, and Panses, and all sorts of Posies!
And Pm fan to confess-there's no denying
facts-that these understanding flower
pretty;
Yet in face of the future, 1 help viewing
The girls they're tackled with something like pity.
Though love the dear Daisies 1 never behold
In the fesh-without fear think how Time passes:
For their fresh fair young faces but conure up visions
OF garrulous, ray-headed Daisies with glasses.
You may say yonder shrinking, shy azure-eyed beauty
Bears the right her name long dropping
lashes:
But the thought of Violet, fair, fat, and forty,
And yard round waist, through my scared fancy
flashes.
There's that pretty poetic young person just passng
To say that she is properly named now is easy;
For today she's sixteen. But, oh, you imagine
A Pansy that's palsied asthmatic and wheezy?
And, tho fair her namesake, white and stately,
The sight of that other young creature, it touches
Me almost tears, I picture a Lily
Grown jaundiced and aded, and going crutches
Oh what's like Rose than young girl just budding
womanhood? Prithee, tho, would it eer strike one
That shrivled and shrunken old woman of eighty
Or ninety was-honest, now!-very much like one?
Then, tho she's soft little rosy pink blossom.
Fond parents bethink you, when naming the baby.
How the you like best would suit somebody's grand
Sinceif baby should vethat just what she may be!
M N. b. in Boston Globe
The Elk Mountain pilot., 1920-04-15
A SONG

There is song somewhere, my dear,
There is a something sings always;
There's song of the lark when skies are clear,
And the song of the thrush when the skies are gray
The sunshine showers across the grain,
And the bluebird trills in the orchard trees
And in and out, when the drip rain,
The swallows twittering ceaselessly
There is song somewhere, my dear
Be the skies above dark fair;
There is ever a song that hearts may hear
There is song somewhere, my dear;
There is song somewhere!
There is song somewhere my DEAR
In the midnight black the midday blue;
The robin pipes when the sun is here,
And the cricket chirrups the whole night through
The buds may blow and the fruit may grow,
And the autumn leaves drop crisp and sere;
But whether the sun, the rain or the snow
There is ever a song somewhere my dear.
There is song somewhere my dear
Be the skies above dark or fair;
There is ever a song that our hearts may hear;
There is ever a song somewhere, my dear;
There is ever a song somewhere!
James Whitcomb Riley.
The Elk Mountain pilot., 1920-04-15

The Gunnison Empire is the County
Seats leading paper, absolutely IN
dependent in politics, but not neutral
in any sense. You can subscribe for
it at the Pilot Office any time. 1t
will be interesting during the coming
campaign. you can rely on that.
The Elk Mountain pilot., 1920-04-15
SUNDAY NIGHT MUSINGS
BY C. T. Rawalt.


deputies will investigate whether the railroad strike is
interfering with the transportation of food sus That
is brilliant idea, indispensable step in ending the
strike We would suggest that after his other activities
somewhat abated he might set the force to in
vestigate why God left the brains out when he made
Palmer. 1t would not benefit any than his
other Investigations but it would and occupy the
U. S. District Attorneys.
big discussing the necessity for large army
urged the other day that relations between this country
and England becoming strained and that any time
might be at with that country. We feel like
ing that whenever this country is menaced by foreign
power you will find all sorts of soldiers ready and will
ing to enlist without conscription compulsory mil
itay legislation The voluntary enlistments could
be obtained the late because the people
in huge majority opposed to it, and the admins
traton that elected the slogan He has kept
of war; knew very well that conscription force
ertion absolutely necessary If to raise
appreciable number of The force exered and
the men who fell victims to the draft now wise 20
many things least among which the utter unappre
citation of their involuntary sacrifice.
Again as in the of Victor Berger every good
Of the New York Legislature were not expelled because
they were socialists but because they had been proven
nenshp and i we're eeeed to oee Anyone who
by s N o ehs @ @ lns
that it is only malicious persecution OF the party on
whose ticket they elected is person of
intellect That was not and never will be the issue
Paonian.
You mean every good Kept paper 40 you not' broth-
Craig? OF could not expect decent self
respecting, patriotic paper to tell the people such
damnng government destroying lie could you? Every
who has the most abstract knowledge of the
form of government here enjoy knows that denying
tho right of the people to correct their real FANClEO
by eecns who trsty represent thsir isess
is sap the very foundations of the and in
the direct actionist his worst Even if you
were foolish enough believe that these
PEELED because they proven dsoya know that
the crooks that expelled them now passing a
bill prohibiting the socialists to ticket But
you not foolish. That never be an excuse with
YOU Tour wickedness based ignorance, but on
wisdom perverted probably by pay. 1t is not like
to perform for nothing and prefer to think
of you at least trying to keep Personally
prefer to remain in the class whom describe
persons sub-norma intellect fellow feel
ing more decenter of supporters over here
would express 1t.
The Wheeling intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1903-1961, 1920-12-09
NEED or ECONOMY

7. n. Merriman & Co. received the
following from u we'll known New 1ork
authority yesterdays:
I think the situation in the United
States Is not altogether deplorabie. The
nation is n. rfcctly solvent. Our ma
tional resources are as enormous as
ever We incurred large war debt but
we can easily pay II and If those in
c~~trol OF the government arc wise
enough to distribute this debt over a
period Of nifty years It can he paid and
no one really know Il. II. however,
they attempt to pay off large portion
Of It in the next ten years. they Will
very seriously cripple the business en-
tcrprise Of the country.
don't know whether tho Rcpubli-
can party has the nerve and courage
to reform tho present system or lack
Of system. OF taxation which is the
most uncconomc scheme that a So
called civilized people ever devised. 1t
StranglcS enterprise. 1t puts check
on fruGalty. It takes out OF the life
Of the young man OF the country any
incentive. and without such incentive
no country ever progressed.
Furthermore thCre is a very great
necessity for public economy not only
In the federal government but in IN"
states and in the cities. l think We
have gone crazy on the subject Of pub
lie expenditures and II will have To -
checked or very serious consequences
will result. believe that 1t will be-
checked rs soon rs the people realize
everyone. And the man that IS injured
the most IS the man that works for
his living each day with his hands or
his brain,
The Wheeling intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1903-1961, 1920-12-09
TO EQUAL|zE
Continued from Page One.)

t!cies In leu of the present tax on the
con6umrr. 10 yield $lO.OOO.OO0.
Al additional 8 per cent tax on Jew
elry and precious metals. to yie!d w.
100000
An additional tax OF ; per cent on mu-
steal instruments to weld $l3.0N0.000.
An additional lax of : per cont on mo-
tion picture MINIS. 10 y!rld Si.oouoOo'
Income Tax ReadjustInent.
In the REIMBURSEMENT Of surfaces. MT.
Houston PROPOSES the division Of income
INTO ''SlvCd' or rciNrc~ted ana spent
On the former class he would limit the
inCor,,r spent would he subjected I" Il
tax ranging az high as 80 per cent
Under The plan proposed 10y the sccr,,-
tarv. incomes bel W. en- $1,000 and $4,000
would De ta\cd .'"T cent on me nart
saved and the sam" on the part spent
Tho Same ratio with 4 graduated In
crease would apply TO Incomes up TO
S30.U00 whore III" maximum, OF ~ per
cent on Stv"d inCorn" is reached; From
So hO0 in $40 hnU the rates would he 2N
rrr cent on saved md - pr cent on
snrpt; $40 ONh 90 -n."rn 20 per cent and
81 per cent Saxon" 10 H.".puV, ~ rcr
cr"t and 80 per Cei'. E'o.uuo 10 Sl"V'
u,A 90 Ter Gu. and 40 per cent. and
cvrr 500, GnO ~ per cent AMI 80 per
cont or 4 total OF 20 per cent hermit so
Tho rro.ram for r"drrming other gov
nrnnirrt obligations will not hc ham
rered by s'"4 1.nsuE. sr RfEme"'S'
Mr. Uoustnn tells congress MAT tho
heavy payments required by the Trans
porta;ion Act had ''dlSarranged the gov
crnlnrnt'S fiscal plans" but he believes
carly SprinE will witness tina! settle
mcnt Of IL. claims OF the railroads un-
der tho guaranty provisions and that
tho treasury then can proceed with It's
previously announced program ar meet
i'm, and retiring tho War Savings Ger
tllicat"S, amounting to $S0U.hou,O 600 and
the Victory Note issue which aggrc-
gates 81 500, 10000
Through operations OF the sinking
fund, use OF the small rcpaymrnts by
foreign governments on loans. and the
rmnloymcnt uf certain salvage returns
To tho treasury. II has retired l.IG4,-
Sa6l5O in bonds, MIR. Houston says. saw
ing 500. 100000 on ia" transactions ny
huyiuC in the opcn markets. or the
amount purchased. bonds aEErcEating
Sl1yln9. 900 were retired from funds re-
paid by The foreign governments.
Lessons Of the world war. Mr.. ious-
ton saws, have shown The need for the
;ranSfnr If some Of the treasury ac-
iivitirS to other departments. Five hu-
rrauS, War RISK Insurance, Prohibition,
Public Health Service. SURPRISING
Architect and Genera! Supply Commit
tee, are in no wa related TO tho fiscal
operation of the government he says.
and urges that they b. placed under
other jurisdiction; TIL" REQUEST. he
adds. is unusual for few II any other
executive department heads have been