The county record. [volume] (Kingstree, S.C.) 1885-1975, 1920-11-11

- way. get sleepy
as soon as l begin to read, and my
wife comes and tells me my snoring Is
disturbing the neighbors."
ITS that way with everything we
look forward to- observed the hotel
keeper, sadly. "ylan always will be,
/ but is never blest. rs some half-baked
! poet remarked. Young Gooseworthy
was in here last evening, bubbling over
with happiness. There wasn't any
body around, so he took me into his
confidence. He's going to marry
| GwendOlin Jimalong, next month, and
he's perfectly satisfied that his mar
ried life will be one long stretch OF
sunshine. He seems to have the idea
! that he's going to do something orig
/ inal when he gets married, but the
idea isn't new. Men have been getting
married ever since Christopher dis
! covered Columbus. Ohio, and every
doggone man jack Of them had the
idea that everlasting bliss was going
| to be inaugurated on the wedding day.
81 listened to GooSeworthy for three
hours, and hadn't the heart to say
anything that would dampen his en-
| thusiasm. His twittering recalled the
. long vanished days when I was get
! ting ready to be married. felt about
! il then Just as he does now. l thought
the parson opened the gates of para
disc when he Joined two loving hearts.
Ny wife lived up to all the plans and
;pecifications, and was and is one of
| the best women in the United States,
hut I hadn't been married three
months before I had sneaking con-
viction that the man who gets married
Is chump.
"a good many optimists say that
married man doesn't need any more
money than a single one, If he marries
the right sort of woman. but they
might as well 90 TO the blackboard
and demonstrate that two and two
make two instead Of four l fell for
that cheerful theory when l was mar
ried. was earning enough to keen
myself comfortably. and never had
any financial worries. | could have
/ been buried for less money than
ook TO be married and the expenses
! from that time forward were double
what they used to he. although my
wife was so economical she used 10
make waists and such things for her
self out OF my superannuated shirts.
"Oh, doggone it, there isn't any M
adulterated happiness in matrimony
wonder that young fellows like Goose
worthy don't look around them, and
contemplate the detected appearance
of the majority Of husbands. But even
! if they did, it wouldn't do them any
good. suppose, for they are full OF
| pine dreams, and they think the girls
! they are going to marry are different
from all other girls. and that they will
prove exceptions to the general rule.
81 had a wise old uncle in those hal
| cyon days. and about week before
the wedding day, he backed me into
! corner and handed me dust-proof
package of wisdom. He tried to lead
me into taking a sensible, view Of the
! future. He talked about the cares and
| responsibilities that would be mine
! after the wedding. and wanted to
know if I felt equal to them. He tried
| TO show me that | wasn't going TO
marry an angel. but a human being
like myself, with a human beings
faults and frailties.
81 Let him get thai far, and then
| told him that his gray hairs alone
| saved him from having his head re-
modelled. and said never wanted him
~ darken my door. and he never did.
had 10 darken it myself, with wal
| nut stain. But many time after
| ward, I recalled Ia. wise words and
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