The Taney County republican. (Forsyth, Mo.) 1895-1992, 1920-01-15
HIS JINx AT WORK
Traveller Felt It When He Saw
Those WhiSkerS.
But That Didn't Prevent Him Fall.
ing" for Probably the Oldest Suck
er" Game in Existence, and
Then Kicking.

Mice dayw said the stout man as he
lowered himself on the seat beside me
In the day. car with a parlor-car look.
Nice" / remarked just to humor
him, although must say that always
try to avoid a man who wears whlsk-
ers. This man was wearing q No. 5
face fungus with ear flaps, l thought
at nrst of asking him II he had to take
out license for his face trimmings.
But, after all, felt that he had kind
face--what | could see of it-behind
the shrnbbery, as it were.
Are you commercial traveler?" he
asked, stroklng his beard to starboard.
NO" replied, "but | once had a
fourth cousin who did seven years In
jail for another Offense. That was the
only member of my family who stray
ed from the narrow path of virtue"
Lucky for your he snapped out,
pushing his plantation In my face. ITS
a dogs life. Everywhere you so peo-
paS tuih bbuuJ TIC pGdCGs
"Ah!" ! interposed, there is a peace
on, then7 | thought I saw something
about 1t In the press"
"Are you an Americana" he raped
out, getting nasty.
"Yes," l said. "Are youi Or do you
live in Hoboken, n. j." | felt
would like to have struck a match aud
started bush fire around the wooded
portion of his face.
~ see you have some cuts on your
face" he remarked.
"Yes. My tonsorial artist lllustrat.
ed me with some funny cuts"
"Ahl" he slipped IN. "You should
shave yourself and you would never
have face like that"
! should like to have told him that
his was no oil painting. Especially did
hate his face mats. I detest a min
who tries to look venerable by wearing
face mats, when underneath he may
have the chin Of q criminal.
DO you wear those germ traps on
purpose?" | asked curiously.
"Them's calnouhage," he said. "Just
TO show what people look like when
they don't shave. travel for Raxro's
safety razOrs, $3.50 each, and seeing
you're a nice sort Of boob l can do
you one for S. Here Is the last one
/ have"
took It. II IL had been a scythe |
should have had harvest with his
beard.
Then fell TO thinking Of his whlsk.
ers again, They were the most vile
whiskers I had ever seen. They stood
out at all angles from his face. |
couldn't make up my mind whether !
should like him better with or with
out them. But ] was quite prepared
to get a lawn mower and try.
Seeing you are good business
man." he went on, 'what about nice
pipe llghtar2 have really good line
at 25 cents each. Sorry I haven't got
one with me, but | can send II on. New.
or fails, and always lights pipe or
cigarette. In fact, II is one of the best
pipe lighters ever invented. Just give
me 25 cents and your address and |
Will send II along"
OF course | fell. handed him the
quarter and got out at the next station.
Some days later package arrived
at my villa. Here was the pipe lighter.
Breathlessly I opened the package,
eager to see the contrivance. 1t was--
Yes, q match. I gulped two mouthfuls
Of fresh air and threw my cigarette IN
the porrldge.
And that Is why, when | meet a man
with fun set of face mats | always
say---(Oh no. you don't. Not here,
at any rate.--Editor.)-Wa Stuart
Marsden In Pennsylvania Grit.