The Washington herald., 1920-07-26
|STAGECOMEDY
OFTIMES REAL
Veteran Tells a Few Good
Ones He Experienced
Behind Footlights.

| Accidents will happen in the best
regulated comedies. When they do,
somebody has to do some quick
thinking. or he will be a good deal
funnier than he had planned to be;
and no actor is comfortable in be-
ing quite that funny.
/ An actor who refuses to be ruff
fled by mishaps is old Frank Bacon.
He told of some funny expetiences
he had been through.
! "0ne time in Miles City, Montana,
we almost didn't nave any orches-
ira. The only orchestra there was in
that theater consisted of one man
/ playing the piano, and when we
arrived we found that this fellow
had beat up his wife and got put
In Jail. The sheriff happened to be
an Elk, and I persuaded him to
bring his prisoner to the theater
for that evening. So the musician
played with his leg chained to the
leg of the piano, and with the
sheriff sitting in the front row be-
asked him how he liked the show.
oh, hell he says, take me back
to jail!'
When I was in Seattle, once, we
had a horse in the play. l hitched
him TO a piece of probing that
represented the wall OF a house. He
was probably tired from hauling
our baggage. At any rate, right in
the middle of the act he walks off.
taking the house along with him
clear out of the theater."
What on earth did you dor
Chased Through Streets.
H Chased down the street after
him and brought him and our
horse back.
\ Another horse that helped TO
make life interesting was one out
in Colorado, that didn't want to
1 climb the stairs of the theater.
There was no runway to take him
up. When he baked the house
manager did, too, refusing to count
! up because we'd advertised that
| there was a horse in the play. He
1 said unless we made good. we
wouldn't get our money. So all of
Nus worked at that horse between
our turns on the stage. tugging and
prodding at him, till finally we got
him up. He was supposed to APP
pear in the first and second acts,
but by the time he arrived in the
wings it was the third act, with a
drawing room set; but we led him
across the stage anyhow. to collect
our money.
I'm another place out West we
had almost as strenuous a time with
a COW. We finally did get her up
stairs, but we never did get her
down again. When we left town
she was still in the theater. For all
! l know she may be there yet"
( There is one comedian on the
American stage who positively rel
ishes the unexpected. To Willie
/ Collier il is the spice of life.
An accoutn of his merry misad-
ventures and oThand surprises
would fill a large folio. Here are
/ typical incidents.
/ Ruins show; Fired.
About the first thing l ever did
on the stage was to ruin a show
and get fired for it The play was
/ 'Odette,' given by Augustin Daly's
/ Company. 1 played a French waiter.
/ All l had to do was bring in tray
! of drinks to three men who were
plotting a murder. AS l made my
entrance and the folding doors were
closed behind me, my long coattails
got caught. There 1 was stuck. l
reached back with one hand holding
the tray wobblingly with the other,
and tried to unfasten the door. No
use. l couldn't keep standing there
all night, holding up the show, so
Il gave a tug and off came both
tails, tearing the coat into a short
Eton jacket. Then l passed my
drinks and tried to make my exit.
Couldn't. Those coattails had put
the lock out of commission. Even
tried to duck out through the fire
place. Finally, seeing l just couldn't
get out, l settled down in a chair
and pretended to fall asleep, so the
Williams could go on with their
murder plot.
Next morning one of the papers
said Daily showed rotten taste in in
Producing such low comedy stuff
into a serious drama
Another time. 1 played a waiter
in the grande fcte scene in Man
kind handing round a tray of ices
made out of cotton. when som"
smart Alec actor threw in a lighted
match, and / had to chase out with
a young bonfire. This time it was
he, not l, that got bounced"