The herald and news. [volume] (Newberry S.C.) 1903-1937, 1920-12-10

s's'ssssSS''''''''''ae two somebody
comes along asking impertinent Ques-
tions as to how many children l have,
and my maiden name before I was
married, and whether there's insanity
in the family.
"I'm sick and tired Of answering
such questions. IF my old friends
want to dig into my family history,
I'll give them all the information they
want, although I may consider their
conundrums in bad taste, but when a
perfect stranger comes along and asks
me If I do my own wash1{ feel that
the line must be dra1 lmewhere.
Every Jack in office asAt 46estions. 1t
used to be that the assessor would
come to the door politely, and inquire
how many dogs we kept, and take our
estimate of the value OF our prop
erty without looking as though he
knew we ought to be prosecuted for
periury. But now he must know the
color Of your grandfather's side whis-
kers, and if you tell him that you keep
no dogs he goes out and looks under
the house, and In the barn, and when
he comes back he warns you that the
penalties for giving false Information
are severe.
s1fr. Curfewi says that the next
time. the assessor comes, he is going
to throw him over the back fence and
kick. him down the alley for dis
tance of seven blocks, and hope he'll
keep his word"
"I didn't mean to offend you" said
the stranger. "I'm introducing wash
ing powder that saves half the labor
and dispenses with soap altogether.
With this marvellous powder woman
can do the weeks washing and have
her clothes hung on the line, inside OF
two hours
"Well, mister, yen take package
Of, your marvellous powder down 10
the creek, and give yourself a good
scrubbing, for you look as though you
had been fishing out of somebody's
dustbin. Your whiskers are full OF
sawdust, anu your face is covered
with CRIME. II you were introducing
bituminous coal, there might be some
excuse for your appearance, but a
man who is selling washing powder
ought to be like the driven snow, or
nobody will have confidence in him.
"And wouldn't have anything 70
do with your washing powder IL you
offered to bring me a wagonload ror
twenty cents. I make my own soap
of I've and grease, and although IT
isn't indorsed by the crowned heads
of Europe, or by preiates or vice pres
idents, it's the best soap ever made'
and I know the ingredients are whole
some. even if they don't comprise
barks and buds and healing herbs.
ayyhen I use my own soap, l kno"
the things I wash won't be any the
worse for it, but the washing powders
sold by agents are made of dynamite
! and lunar caustic, and Il garment once
| washed with them will never De III
to use again.
"tast spring was feeling TOO poor
" TO make the usual batch OF soap
so I bought a package OF Washing
! powder from an agent who had Ms
nockets full Of testimonials SHOWING
| that he was man Of high moral char
acter. 1t happened that week ina
| all of Mr.. Curfew's white Shirts were
IN the wash. Mr.. Curfew is very par
! ticular about his shirts. They mus
.he as white as arctic snow, or the way
| he raves around the house is a dis
! grace. Well, I wish you could nave
seen those shirts after they wer'
washed. They had an old gold coiof
and have been getting yeliower eVe'
! since. and Mr.. Curfew never sits ao"l
! but he speaks about it ana 9aAe'
things uncomfortable.
$50 you had better toddle asonl
! and sell your washing powder to some
! woman who doesn't know how to MAKE
! good soap"