davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Jones County news., 1920-12-02
GETTING II Straioht.

Wife (arriving home late)-Oh,
dear, I'm so sorry; I'll get your din
ner in a jiffy. l ran down to the club
meeting at three and it didn't wind up
till six.
Husband-Humph You mean it
was wound up at three and didn't run
down till six.
The Jones County news., 1920-12-02

woman ccnfers upon herself O
doubtful honor when she reforms q
man by marrying him.
The Jones County news., 1920-12-02

"You hear lot about Easy street.
"Well ?"
"But a man who peddles articles
from door to door never finds it,"
The Jones County news., 1920-12-02

When the last fool is dead there
won't be anybody to buy him or to
attend the funeral.
The Jones County news., 1920-12-02

Experience ID jewel, and 1t need
be So, for 1T is often purchased at an
Infinite te.-Shakespeare.
The Jones County news., 1920-12-02

Famous Whoppers.
'Do you premise to love, honor and
obey?"
81 do."-Detroit News.
The Jones County news., 1920-12-02

Music Teacher-Johnny. don't you
know what your mother sends you
here for?
Johnny-For spite. She wants me
to be able to play worse than the girl
In the next fiat.--Boston Transcript.
The Jones County news., 1920-12-02

Hurry motherl A teaspoonful of
California" Syrup of Figs today
may prevent sick child tomorrow.
If your child is constipated, bilious,
feverish, fretful, has cold, collie, or II
stomach is sour, tongue coated, breath
bad. remember = good "physic-laxa-
The Jones County news., 1920-12-02

confidence during rs years. Manufactured
only by WriRht's Indian Vegetable rtI Co..
372 Pearl st.. Nsw York City-Adv.
The Jones County news., 1920-12-02

Never Judge the fidelity of friend
by his eagerness to point out your
faults.
The Jones County news., 1920-12-02

A $40 gold piece is nice round
sum.
The Jones County news., 1920-12-02

A man isn't beaten as long as he's
not discouraged
The Jones County news., 1920-12-02
A PASSING MEMORY

Waiter-Er, haven't you forgotten
something, slr2
Dner--yes; what decent meal
tastes like.
The Jones County news., 1920-12-02

Freakishness In art subslsts on the
acqulescence Of hosts who dor's care
one way or another.
The Jones County news., 1920-12-02
OUCH! ANOTHER
RHEUMATIC TWINCE
Get busy and relieve those pa.ns
with that handy bottle of
SIoan's Linimcnt

VTTHAT Sloan's does, 1t does thor
w oughly-penetrates without rab-
- bing to the afflicted part and
promptly relieves most kinds of exter-
nal pains and aches. You'll find it
clean and Notwithstanding. Keep ii
hctdy for sciatica, lumbago, neuralgia,
over-cxerted muscles, stiff joints, back
ache, pains, bruises, strains, sprains,
bad weather afrer-effccts.
For 80 years Sloan's Liniment has
helped thousands the world over. You
aren't likely to be an exception. 1t cer-
tainly does produce results.
All druggists-3Sc, zoe, s. 40.
S1OafpsS
Linirrse1ltG( G(ssssdam)
ssu srsu~,.s~.u~-. .~uw~s =
The Jones County news., 1920-12-02

Love Is blind; therefore 1t can't SEQ
Its own finish.
The Jones County news., 1920-12-02

tive" is often all that Is necessary.
Children love the "fruity' taste OF
genuine @Califcrnia" Syrup of Figs
which has directions for babies and
children printed on the bottle. Say
California" or you may get IN ini-
tation fg syrup. -Bcwarei
The Jones County news., 1920-12-02
USE "DIAMOND DYES"


Dyes Color Card'-16 rich colors. Ady
The Jones County news., 1920-12-02

cuticura Soap for the Complexion.
Nothing better than Cuticura soap
daily and Ointment now and then as
needed to make the complexion clear,
scalp clean and hands soft and white.
Add to this the fascinating, fragrant
Cuticura Talcum and you have the
Cuticura Toilet Trio-Adv.
Talk.
Talk is cheap, but not when money
does it.-Life
Meafal exertion Is as distasteful to
some as physical.
The Jones County news., 1920-12-02

Knows Better.
Mrs. Grag-"Does your husband ex-
pect you to obey him?" Mrs. Orig
"Oh, no! He's been married before r.
The Chattanooga news. [volume] (Chattanooga, Tenn.) 1891-1939, 1920-09-22
DOCTORS use
CALOTABS FOR
COLDS and FLU
Influenza and Grippe, Like Or
binary Colds, Require Gallo
tabs, the Purified and Re-
fined Calomel Tablets That
Are Nausealess, Safe and
Sure.

Doctors are warning the public that
simple colds and mild cases OF infiu-
onga often lead to pneumonia and Other
serious complications They say that
every cold should receive immediate
attention and that the first step in the
treatment Is TO make sure that the
liver is active, For this purpose Gallo
tabs the perfected. nausealess calomel
tablets are the surest. best and most
agreeable laxative,
One Calotah az he'd time with a swal-
low Of water-Athat's all, no salts, no
nausea. and no upsettlng of the dices-
tion and appetite, Next morning your
cold has vanished. your liver Ia active,
your system Is purified and refreshed
and YOU are feeling flne with hearty
appetite for breakfast. Eat what you
please.--no danger
For your protection, Calotahs are sold
only In original scaled packages. price
thirtv-hve cents All druggists recon-
mend and guarantee Calotahs and arc
authorized 10 refund the price II YOU
arc not delighted with hem.--(Adv)
The Chattanooga news. [volume] (Chattanooga, Tenn.) 1891-1939, 1920-09-22
ssx JOHN q. sHAMsLIN.,

Benton, Sept. 81 notice, from
newspaper reports, that "Uncle John
Shell. OF Greasy Creek. KY, has cele-
brated another birthday. now claiming
70 be l32 years old. being the Oldest
person I'm the world. II seems that he
celebrates his birthday on one day one
wear and on another day another year,
and the more birthdays he has the
more money he makes.
But when II comes 20 celebrating
real birthdays Uncle Johnnie" In not
N 4 with Mrs. Sarah Lingerfelt OF this
For several years / had had II in
mind 20 visit Aunt Sarah" and talk to
her and learn something OF her life
and history, but Il was only n short
time ago that was permitted to make
Il was early one morning that tin
lizzie pulled up In front OF the Office
door and stopped. The occupants of
the car were representative OF we'll
known Chattanooga concern and Wal
ter Cline, the man the grounding made
famous, or the man that made the
grnundhog famous, and convinced GER
tain skeptics that groundhogs really
exist. Mr.. Cline informed me that they
were on their way to visit AUNT Sa-
.ah" Lingerfelt. and invited me to Join
them. ! gave the tin lizzie the once
over, and asked him n he thought we
sould make the trip in the thing, and
ne said he thought we could. that he
rad travelled more than $4,000 miles in
I. visiting the home OF Uncle John"
she'll. the home OF Sergt. York, climbed
likes peak time or two, and had
The Chattanooga news. [volume] (Chattanooga, Tenn.) 1891-1939, 1920-09-22
PROHIBITION in U. S.
HAS WORLDS ATTENTION
Declares British Ambassador.
Daniels Speaks-Pageant
Feature Of Program.

Washington. Sept 22.--Prohibition In
the United States has attracted the at :
tention OF the world, Sir Auckland
Geddea. British ambassador. declared
In discussing the opening session Tues
day OF the fifteenth international con-
gress against alcoholism. In support OF
his assertion. Sir Auckland told the
congress that detailed reports Of its
proceedings had been requested by his
home government and that the govern
ments of other nations were undertake
Ing studies OF the sociological and eco
nomic effects OF total abstinence.
Practically all OF the European ma
tions and a number OF tho South Amer
lean republics were represented at the
opening session, which was held In the
Pan-American building. After greet
ings had been extended by. Assistant
Secretary OF State Merley Smith and
Director General Rowe. OF. the Pam
American union, replies were made by
the heads OF the various foreign dele
cations.
Much Of the FIRST session was taken
up with the welcoming ceremonies. In
elected Edwin Dinwiddie. former Iegis-
lative superintendent OF the Antisaioon
League OF America, chairman to sue
coed Premier DeBeerenbrouck, Of The
Netherlands. who was made president
OF the international committee OF the
congress. II. II. Cheerington, OF wes-
terville. o., was chosen secretary OF the
congress and OF the international COM
mittee.
Delegates to the congress last night
of Temperance" which was acted on
the east front Of the capitol, and which
depicted the progress OF prohibition In
the United states. Later the delegates
The Chattanooga news. [volume] (Chattanooga, Tenn.) 1891-1939, 1920-09-22
A Simple Way to
Remove Dandruff

There Is one sure way that has never
failed TO remove dandrum at once, and
that Is to dissolve II, then you destroy
IL entirely To do this Just get about
arVon from any drug store (this Is all
YOU win need, apply II at night when
retiring; use enough TO moisten the
scalp and rub Il in gently with the
finger tips
BY morning most N not all OF your
dandruf win he gone, and three or four
more applications win completely dis
solve and entirely destroy every single
sign and trace ~ g. no matter how
much danGrun YOU may have
You viii ind All itching and digging
~ the sCalp WIN stop instantly, and
your hair viii he flufty. ustrnus glossy.
silky and soft and look and feel a
hundred times bctter.--Adv.
The Chattanooga news. [volume] (Chattanooga, Tenn.) 1891-1939, 1920-09-22
Polk County Woman
Near I2O Years of Age
Story of Mrs. Sarah Lngefelt-Long Life in Mountains Ver
table Record of Heroic Deeds and Hardshps.

visited Heils Hollow and the big smo-
kies OF North Carolina. and had never
had n breakdown nor a puncture, Mr.,
Cline having convinced me OF lizzie
ability to make the trip, ! climbed in
and we were on.
Mr. Cline remarked that there must be
something wrong. He stopped and got
out, and on examination found that
one OF the castings was punctured. We
soon had on a new casing and were on
our way again
The first place TO engage our atten-
tion was the little town OF Austral, To-
Gated Just below where the Hiwnssee
river breaks through the gap OF Chill
howie mountain. II was here where
stood. but there q nothing now left to
show just where the town stood.
Came Reliance and then sprlngtown.
From Springtown on to Towie creek
some real mountain roads were en-
countered. Along about II o'clock we
Aunt Sarah" unannounced.
Mrs. Lingerfelt lives with her young
est daughter. who is n years old, and
with her grandson, Frank Smith.
There IL no authentic record Of the
best INFORMATION obtsinabie. she was
born in December. 1901. in Cherokee
county. North Carolina. At the age OF
IS she married Jonathan Smith. Mr..
Smith died during the Civil war. and
later Mrs. Lingerfelt married Amos
LinEerfelt, and in n few years was
again left widow. At the time OF the
death Of her first husband she was left
with several small children to look
after and make living for herself and
them. The story OF her life IL a record
OF heroic deeds and struggles against
adverse circumstances. For many
years. and In fact up until about thirty
years ago, when she lost her eyesight,
she hoed and plowed corn and did gem
eral farm work. in addition to doing
her homework. IN
In addition 70 being blind, Mrs. Lin
gerfelt IL crippled with rheumatism and
had to be carried out on the porch Of
The Chattanooga news. [volume] (Chattanooga, Tenn.) 1891-1939, 1920-09-22

/ three departments OF his home govern
ment were intensely interested" In
the work OF the congress and named
trade and the ministry OF health.
Discussing prohibition from the
standpoint OF scientist, DIR. Eugene
Lyman Fisk, medical director OF the
Life Extension institute, New York. de-
very satisfactory account OF its GUS
tody OF the human body despite the
development attained through the
years. Man, he said, has reached only
the border land OF physical freedom"
The league OF nations, by its promise
of the prohibition OF the liquor traffic.
slave trade and traffic In arms in man
date countries, "holds up a beacon to
light the way for reforms In older and
stronger nations" Secretary Daniels
declared In addressing the congress
"Articie XXI OF the covenant has
the promise of deliverance to peoples
In the stage where tutelage Is needed
and acceptable" said Mr.. Daniels. 80
long as great nations carried them,
opium. arms. intoxicants and practiced
the slave trade, such nations were
bringing curses and not blessings to
peoples who looked TO them to lift
them out OF ignorance and its attend
ant evils.
while no league OF nations could
have voice In the domestic affairs OF
member nations. the declaration Of
Article XXI has the Significance OF
international appreciation that the
three specific things they promise to
prohibit In mandatory countries are
evils which the world should prevent;
ARTICLE XXI, therefore, becomes the
basis for good men everywhere to agi-
tate In their own country to prevent
arms falling into the hands Of persons
either weak OF win power or with. evil
purpose to prevent the traffic In IiQuor
or In human beings. The promise TO
mandatory peoples will thus become a
beacon to light the way for reform In
older and stronger nations"
The Chattanooga news. [volume] (Chattanooga, Tenn.) 1891-1939, 1920-09-22
NATURALIZATION or WON.
HI JUST A SILLY HOAX

Atlanta. Ga, Sept. 22.-Nor-
man Hapgood. recently United
States minister to Denmark, dis
tinguished publicist and author
ny on present day Russia. ~ in
Atlanta.
Mr.. Hapgood was asked Tues
day by q Georgia representative
about the alleged naturalization
of women by the Russian Soviet
government. He said the charges
are too silly TO be discussed.
These charges have not only
been offlcially denied and dis
proved by the soviet govern
ment." he said, "but they have
been exploded by the British
foreign office and our own de-
partment OF state. and by every
investigator who has entered
Russia and there have been liter
ally hundreds OF them. Any
repetition OF these charges IL
simple sllliness,v
The Chattanooga news. [volume] (Chattanooga, Tenn.) 1891-1939, 1920-09-22

from the effective date OF each tariff
and supplement to tariff respectively,
unless otherwise ordered by this conn
mission, and no changes should be
made In such rates charges and fares
sion unless authorized BY special per-
mission OF this commission; and
''It Is further ordered that copy OF
this order be filed in the tariff fles in
the office OF the railroad and public
utilities ,, comssiHp and that copies
Carolina. clinchfieid q Ohio railway,
Southern railway, Cincinnati New Or
leans g. Texas Pacific railroad, Nash.
The Chattanooga news. [volume] (Chattanooga, Tenn.) 1891-1939, 1920-09-22

willie. Chattanooga g. st. Louis railway,
Louisville & Nashville railroad, Mobile
81 Ohio railroad, Illinois Central raft
road, Chicago, Memphis a. Gulf rail-
road. Hartman & Northwestern rail-
road, Tennessee g. North Carolina rail-
road companies, and that said carriers
De and they are hereby made respond
ents to this proceeding, and that they
be duly notified OF the time and place
OF the hearing above ordered.
"B, A. .ENLOE.
HARVEY H. HANNAH.
GEORGE N. WEIGH, =,
nyniaainraru -
The Chattanooga news. [volume] (Chattanooga, Tenn.) 1891-1939, 1920-09-22

her little cabin home In a chair In
order to pose for her picture.
She has very good memory and heI
hair In as white as snow and as fine nj
silk. She seemed delighted to have hel
picture taken.
After an hour or 30 spent at the
little cabin home, we bid Aunt Sarah
and relatives good-by and started or
Without mlshap. Once or twice. wher
crossing some OF the little mountain
streams, Mr.. Cline remarked that II
looked like there might be wildcat
still up about tho head OF that creek
but we didn't take time to make any
Investigations.
The Chattanooga news. [volume] (Chattanooga, Tenn.) 1891-1939, 1920-09-22
About Chronic catarrh.

Chronic catarrh results from neg
lected cold or from q succession OF
colds, that Ia, before you are over one
cold you contract another. The in
ehronie when " tbe eolS DeeoerlS
treated and promptly cured there IL no
further trouble Parents often neglect
colds contracted by their children and
chronic catarrh. from which they never
fully recover. IL the result. To get rid
OF a cold take Chamberlain's Cough
Remedy II Is prompt and effectuai.
.-(Ady)
The Chattanooga news. [volume] (Chattanooga, Tenn.) 1891-1939, 1920-09-22

waste. Use only a little. It
goes a long ways.
Grandma saves time and cuts
soap bills. Soak your clothes
with Grandma. No rubbing
is needed. Your washing is
over earlier. There is no chip
ping nor slicing of bar soap.
The Chattanooga news. [volume] (Chattanooga, Tenn.) 1891-1939, 1920-09-22

Take GROVES TASTELESS CHILL
TONIC to destroy the Malarial Germs
in the Blood and thus Prevent ChIlls.
75c.--(Adv.)
The Chattanooga news. [volume] (Chattanooga, Tenn.) 1891-1939, 1920-09-22

The most economical soap
that you can buy from the
cost standpoint You may
still purchase a large pack
age of Grandma for SC.
A real soap in powdered
form. Wonderful for clothes.
You measure it in just the
quantities you need without
The West Virginian. [volume] (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1914-1974, 1920-11-22
M~-r
Suits that we're Low
will be Is LOWER!
--fOr tUO days only!

A7ITH practically a full seasons wear in store for Suit purch-
w asers this two-day sale offers a truly remarkable opportun.
iy for saving. The stock here is not a "season-end' or odds and
ends proposition. 1t is wel-rounded as to fashions, materials
and sizes; there are Suits for all the women in Fairmont who
want them for late Fall and Winter needs. Tuesday or Wednes-.
day you can save exactly ONE-THIRD fyou choose an Osgood's
The West Virginian. [volume] (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1914-1974, 1920-11-22
Choose any Osgood Coat
One Fourth Reduction
TWO DAYS ONLY!
TWO DAYS Only!

VIZ E Have maintained all along our Coat Prices were the lowest
w in toVn-uuaity consdered-but these two days we will go even
farther in value giving. Figure it out! We will 25% discount every single
Coat in stock, and it's an exceptionally large stock. There's every OPP
portunty in the world to find the Coat you want at this substantial
saving.
The West Virginian. [volume] (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1914-1974, 1920-11-22
Evening Fr0cks a:
as Daytime Dresse
RE- UCED
The Osgood Dress Assortment is now the largest in the history
ofthe Store and Every Dress is Embraced in this Reduction

ONE doesn't expect Evening Frocks to be
~ price-redueed right at the beginning Of
the social season-yet the dozens and dozens
of new modes here will be offered at ONE
FOURTH less tomorrow and Wednesday.
One doesn't look for new Dresses for after
noon and street wearing just in from New
York to be SO soon reduced in price-yet the
asortments received only last week are sub"
ject to the general saving Of fourth. This
is an extraordinary chance to select the Dress
you want at a much lower price than you
would usually pay.
The West Virginian. [volume] (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1914-1974, 1920-11-22
---including New Goats from
New York Last Week

The finest and newest and certainly the most desirable Coats that
have come to town this season, are to be found here, At the end Of last
week we received upwards to two hundred new models, some Of which
are the finest examples of wearing apparel we've ever seen. There are
any number Of plain and beautifully furtrimmed Cloth Coats; several Of
the popular fur-trimmed Cloth Goats in all wanted lengths with all the
smartest Fur Collars. Each Coatf for two days at ONE-FOURTH RE-
DUCTION.
The West Virginian. [volume] (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1914-1974, 1920-11-22
Imported and Model Suits are
important items now in stock

m HIS is indeed a rare opportunity to selects different Suit-one outoI
L the ordinary run of style and quality. Only a few weeIsag MI. Qsgood
purchased some wonderful imported Suits and models from better known
New York designers and they art included las are all Suits in the St~e) IN.
this sweeping offer. r
The West Virginian. [volume] (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1914-1974, 1920-11-22

n Year ago we conducted a notably important Sale
"A two days prior to Thanksgiving. This year we
have made even greater preparations to serve the ap-
parel needs Of women who will be newly CARRIED for
the holiday, Tomorrow and Wednesday should be
banner days here!
The West Virginian. [volume] (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1914-1974, 1920-11-22

= ACH Assortment Of up-to-the-minute apparel ems
traced in this store-wide sale emphasizes the truth Of
our statements that We are bringing prices to lower
levels. For these two days savings Of extraordinary
amount will be the rule here-savings that drive home
the wisdom of buying now.
The West Virginian. [volume] (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1914-1974, 1920-11-22
A few price Illustrations

Every Suit In Stock Will BE Sold at the Discount Of One-Third.
The evening herald. (Klamath Falls, Or.) 1906-1942, 1920-06-23

Jim Hilton planted 90 acres OF
Bpuds. Yes folks. he planted them
All right. And JamoS had rare visions
OF wealth pcrmentlng HIS mind. Ny.
shat Jim wasn't going to do when
them thar tatcrs n cum up, Police
forco'-not much-no more police
force for Brother Hilton. We heard
Il wnn u Pierce Arrow that James was
figuring on. Anyhow II was some
such high.prlc.d car aa that But
sud 10 relate. all James pipe dronm@
have gorc up IN smoke--there amt
no NOR, tat.fn We'll. but you ray
didn't he plant them Oh. ycs--5o
acres OF them and there Amt q
burned ppud left out Of the whole
cnboodlr OF en-,
The evening herald. (Klamath Falls, Or.) 1906-1942, 1920-06-23

You soc, folks, ia like thls--A
colony Of Jack rabbits about ai1 inches
long happened to yet line on Jim's
spud patch. with the result that the
little Jack rabbits are now about
three rc.t long. and Vim Amt got q
spud to his name. It's too bad. but
thes. young fellows will get thess big
idcaa into their mindS--and tn. devil
and all his angels cant stop them. 40
wha, nr. you going to do. Maybe
th.y'ii learn In time. and then they
may ooufiuc their efforts TO making
nm honest living. and no, to dabbiing
In high finance.
The evening herald. (Klamath Falls, Or.) 1906-1942, 1920-06-23

Some years ago Andy was practie'
Ing medicine In San Francisco On,
day h. had call TO u ccfiain point,
junction Of two main thorough.
fares. but when he got there he found
that there was nothing 10 do. All
the victims had been injured 20
slightly that they were able to walS
hons, Andy was krcniy dlsappoint
od. but hts chauffeur was equal to the
occasion. aud. walking up To him Snid
In nice. Kind sort OF way. Never
mind. Doe Just jump In tho car
III run some huslurls down for you
before wc gvt home"
The evening herald. (Klamath Falls, Or.) 1906-1942, 1920-06-23

Better keep your hands OFT high
finance. Yim-rlray. that TO the A q.
= Sassi"tr They are much more
competent TO deal Ia those sort OF
propositions than y-u are Aud be-
s'd there are Few Bootlegger- ief,
around town yet. whom Il might pay
you TO try and round M That In ~
course u I, does not Interfere WITH
your regular police duty.
The evening herald. (Klamath Falls, Or.) 1906-1942, 1920-06-23

Chances are he viii run you in but
{ b. doe, luat send In a hurry up
,all q the Herald orncr. and Mr..
Murray will get In touch with the
Lone SlaF. and. having some pull
h.marl; be- viii See what he can do
towards gutt,ng. you out.
The evening herald. (Klamath Falls, Or.) 1906-1942, 1920-06-23

very proud OF that skeleton" us
he7" asked tho other little tot.
why" "Oh, I don't know Just why.
but he maybe II was bis first
patient"
The evening herald. (Klamath Falls, Or.) 1906-1942, 1920-06-23

Harry Thrash.r has been sick an,
wo met him on the street outsid,
SsansOn's barber shop yesterday
Did the doctor treat you today" ",
The evening herald. (Klamath Falls, Or.) 1906-1942, 1920-06-23

Then they toll another one on
Andy. but We viii not vouCh Tor the
truth ~ this one. although oh sell
nuff Hcd You know. Andy has a
little girl ands shea exceptionally
smart for her az, Tho lItti. girl
aud one OF her playmaics wer. play
Ing In Daddy's office not No long ago
when suddenly the little invited guest
pulled open a closet door. aud eI.
posed to view an articuiatcd skeleton
For the lands sake said the iittio
failow Who was playing with Lois.
what under the sun In that thinE 80
oh" said the baby. my daddy Is