The Washington herald., 1920-12-12
Post t-Mortem on Campaign
Features Gridiron Dinner
Satiric Shafts Hurled at Candidates and
Politicians, Many of Whom
Were Present.

Making merry at q post mortem
ordinarily would be considered
heartIess and in the worst Of form.
That newspaper band known ~
the Gridiron Club. and devoted to
the garnished board with sparkling
wit. shafts of satire and laughable
lampoons on the side. last night
demoQstrated that such seemingly
incongfuous joliity can be made
quite con1n1e II fant.
The occasion was the organiza-
tion's thirty-fifth annual dinner at
the New willard and the post-mor-
tenn was political in character.
Two hundred guests, including the
usual group of diplomats, high gov
ernment officials, and big men In the
business world. found the more
than-usually finished program Q
source of smile and laugh-provok-
ing amusement
President a,d Vice President Henered
Before getting down to the scin-
tillant foolery which is the piece de
resistance of these affairs. the club
members, of whom there were seven
ty-five at the tables. presented.
Though the retiring president. w.
w. Jermane. a large silver gridiron
to Vice President Marshall. referred
to as a "Gridiron steady" A similar
emblem was sent to President Will
son. who, before his illness. was q
frequent guest at the banquets.
The first of the main skits of the
evening was q front porch scene Al
Marion. Ohio. where such characters
as Senator Harding. Harry NJ
Daugherty (present at the banque,
in person). John w. Weeks. william
Jenning0Bryan and "the slusn fund
appeared viii II. Hays was re-
vealed singing iplaintiveiy to the
then Republican, candidate a ditty
setting forth that: Ny2z
For four long years I passed the hal
From Maine to Mexico;
/ organized and specialized
On ways to raise the dough.
And SO, dear friends, when Cabinet
jobs
Are waiting to be fiiIed,
And White House doors have vel.
come knobs,
For those who sowed and titled,
Then please remember.
Please remember me-
Coolidge and Harding I'm Arkunent
When a newspaper corresponden nj
remarked to former Senator Weeks
You are being mentioned for Sec.
Iretary of the Navy,"the latter urged
Speak up SO that Senator Hardins
can hear you,
In another episode crystal gazer
garbed in somber robes, read poIiti,
cal futures In his ,shininr<srh. Herr
- soees of his snnonncsd diseoS'
President Harding is sending tn,
league OF nations to the Alien Prop.
erty Custodian.
vice President Coolidge and Mr.
Harding are having an exciting dis.
cussion- Calvin has uttered nine
words in the last hour"
The gazer found that president
Harding is working on a message &c
Congress, but when asked for the
text. he could only submit: Il can
not give you that. but the style will
cause no intellectual Inconvenience :
Named 500, Haven't Finished.
10 snow that the post-mortem ap.
Piled to all. three new members OF
the club were arraigned as to their
fitness to be on the rolls. This trio
composed of political workers, have
been engaged in making a Cabinet
for the President-eiect.
How many names have you men
tioned?" one was asked.
About hve hundred" came the
answer.
How many Cabinet places are
there?"
Ten"
And you haven't finished yetY'
How can /? Harding hasn't be.
gun"
Maintaining the mortuary theme
OF the making. Mark Anton,
Hitchcock next entered and .deliy.