The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1920-11-17
Today
~ Countries Reforming.
Pigtail Strainers.
What Women Want.
Still Making Gas.
ARTHUR BRISBANE
lcopyrisht. isss).

tSopyu6ht. istsI
The League Of Nations, with
representatives Of forty-one coun-
tries of the world, is In session in
Geneva. The statement that the
United States has mot even an
observer present" is incorrect.
The best observers are there,
trained newspaper reporters. They
describe an interesting gather
ing, white, black and brown men
from all corners Of the earth.
They also declare unanimously
that the United States is missed
BY all. Well il may be. The United
States Treasury was to be the OK
at the barbecue, and when the OK
Is absent, the barbecue is a fizzle.
With this country safely out Of
1t, il is pleasant to note that
forty-one nations are gathered to
discuss the advisability of giving
up cutting each others throats.
The United States, which hasn't
made war, is not going to make
war, but is always going to defend
itself, and be able to defend itself,
has no place in that gathering.
The assembled gentlemen are do
ing their best to reform and sub
stitute justice for war and muir
der.
How powerful Is imagination?
II a plate of soup were put be-
fore you and'the waiter said, that
soup was strained through filter
ing cloth made of Chinese pig
tails" you might push the soup
aside.
The Interstate Commerce Com
mission has established a carload
rate for sending filtering cloth
made Of hair from 100000 Chi
nese queues.
The cloth Is used for filtering
of all kinds; heat in the process
destroys germs.
Strange ups and downs in his
tory. The conquerors Of China
compelled Chinese girls to squeeze
their feet so they could not run
away from their conquerors. Soon
the Chinese women thought they
liked 1t. 1t was so respectable.
Our women once thought the same
of squeezed waists.
The Chinese men we're ordered
to let their hair grow long. The
long queue was convenient for the
Tartar conqueror. Galloping along
ON his little pony, he could take
hold of the queue with one hand
and cut off the Chinese head with
the other.
After a while Cinnamon became
attached to their queues and would
rather die than sacrifice them.
Then came the republic, with
liberty, and the queues went. And
now they are used to strain soup
in America. There is moral In
that, somewhere. ..s,.-~-
Men and women misunderstood
each other. The learned Judge
Lewis, of Chicago, meditating on
divorce cases that come before
him, says: "Women are like kit
tens. You have got to pet them to
keep them happy"
Cynical women have said: "Men
are like pigs. You have got to
feed them to keep them happy"
Both are mistaken. What men
and women want is Intellectual in
terest. Men usually are too dull
to give it, and that's what's the
-, ,,offay x,,;tb roorr;o nm M a ,,,lo
Women don't want to be. petted.
They despise it. They want to be
respected, interested mentally.
The Western Union Telegraph
supplies an excellent argument for
Government ownership.
1t notifies the State Department
that it cannot send cablegrams ex-
cept after payment in advance.
Rather "upitty" even for a big COR
poration addressing an Admins
tration on its last legs.
Secretary of State Colby is a
first-class fighting lawyer. The
Western Union will probably
change its mind in a day or two
about refusing credit to the United
States.
Meanwhile, observe the prepos-
ferrous proposition that the Gov
ernment must not own its own
telegraph wires and can be told by
a corporation, creature of the Gov
ernment, that it cannot use the
cables for national business ex-
cept on q cash-in-advance basis.
While others. go to Geneva and
talk blessed peace, Lloyd George
attends to business. He has just
told the House of Commons that
under his orders scientists are at
work improving various brands of
deadly gas used in the war.
The League Of Nations says you
must not do this, but Lloyd George
says that other nations not in the
league may be, or are, improving
their brands of gas; therefore,
he is doing the same. England
can rely On Lloyd George, as long
as he lasts to supply brains for
the empire. Also good reasons for