South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1920-05-23
Girl For An Ideal Wife BY Hsze" RopAo"d


There goes a girl who would
make you an ideal WIFE" announced
the Widow, as a frilly young person
swept past the Bachelors table with
out deigning TO glance at him.
Great Scott" he exclaimed. drop
ping three Jumps Of sugar into his
tea in his confession. I've refused
her, long ago."
ask you to marry her, Mr.. Weather
by"
"N-not exactly" confessed the
Bachelor. You see, IL"
, You didn't give her a chance!"
accused the Widow with conviction.
You delivered your ultimatum, at
the first meeting. You fired the
first gum"
did what?"
Told her you weren't a marry
ing man." answered the Widow,
without moments hesitation.
i've been refused that way, lots
OF times" And she nOnchalantly
reached for the cinnamon toast.
"YOu!" exclaimed the Bachelor,
almost dropping his tea-cup, why,
how could a man-how dare he"
"A man will dare anything, when
he's sufficiently frightened, laughed
the Widow. 1T was not a cold
heart, out cold fear that drove them
to it," she sighed sympathetically.
That girl you fancy would make
me an ideal wife" began the Bach
elor. hastily changing the subject,
lis charming. But she's much too
wise and popular. and frivolous.
She's a potential 'vamp'!" and he
bit his toast with virtuous decision.
you mean" said the Widow.
that she's an accomplished CO.
quette?"
Exactly"
Then, why don't you snap her
up?" demanded the Widow why
has a man such an aversion to
marrying the one kind Of woman, in
all the world, who can understand
him ?"
Good Lord!" groaend the Bach
elor. I'm afraid
Afraid of what?" scoffed the
Widow. That she will understand
you too well?"
Perhaps" grinned the Bachelor.
"And besides a chap wants to read
his own books-first.'
Dear me! On that basis, a
woman would never marry at all.
retorted the Widow. Where in
the world could she find a masculine
heart that hasn't already been read
by half a dozen other women"
ooh, that's different" declared
the Bachelor. Everybody knows
that a man who has had his fling
will make the best husband, once
he settles down. A man who has
seen life will not be so apt 10 be
looking for II. after marriage; a
man who has known a lot Of women
is pretty sure OF his choice when he
selects one OF them from out OF a
variegated assortment"
Then. why on EARTH" demanded
the Widow, Shouldn't a girl who
has known and fiirted with a lot of
men be much more apt 10 be sure
OF her own heart. whom she makes
her choice, than one who simply
takes her irst offer-haphazard?
Why shouldn't = girl. who has fan
cied herself in love several times.
be much more apt 70 know the real
thing from the imitation when she
finds IL, than a girl who has never
been engaged. or kissed?"
but that's Just IT," insisted the
Bachelor desperately. "A man likes
to fatter himself that he is the
first 10 kiss his own wife,"
"Of courss!" coed the Widow.
And a woman can fiatter herself
IL she is the last to kiss her own
husband Isn't that just like a
mans reasonin-.! But. a girl VINO
has cen courted Pr kissed is much
apt to wonder. after marriage, how
other men make love, Mr.. Weather
by. A girl who has known the
giamor OF romance is much less
apt TO wake up and yearn for il,
after the honeymoon is over. and
the prosaiC mOnotony OF marriage
has set IN. Why. most OF the nice,
quiet, happy, successful wives [
know were perfectly outrageous
heartbreakers before they married.
and most OF the married fiirts I know
were wO rem who married their first
love. and began 10 wonder. after
ward. IL their husbands were really
the most fascinating men in the
orld. II must be awfully hard on