Gilpin observer., 1920-06-17
MY WIFE'S
DIAMONDS
By o. B. DU Bois

(CCpyright)
My name is Raymond, Henry ]. Ray
mond, and am stock broker by pro-
fession.
You probably remember the rise of
g. r. Q. In nineteen-two. Well, was
one of the tight little sticks in the
financial kite at that time, and I got
mine. am going to be perfectly
frank, my hat-size increased directly
after this transaction.
began to buy diamonds for Mrs.
Raymond, and never stopped until l
had loaded that clever little lady with
gems galore. 1 even bought them for
my wife's sister. The day gave Mrs.
R the diamond necklace, l gave
one to her sister Belle. 1t was scan
dalous the way bought diamonds.
They never came too big or brill
liant for me, and every stone was
tested by my friend, Silverstein.
used to lunch with Mr.. Sllverstein
quite often. his pawn-broker Shop be-
ing located on the same block with
my office.
Well, you know the condition of
the market in nineteen-three. 1t was
simply awful, and things going from
bad to worse.
l was living out at BrintOn that
year. and when the winter came on l
was simply cupped for money. You
can imagine how bad things were
when tell you that sifted the fur
mace ashes and shOveled the snow just
to economic, and yet we seemed to be
paying our household bills. Somehow
that blessed little wife Of mine could
stretch a ten-dollar bill until 1t COW
cred fifty dollars worth of expenses.
Matters came to focus, however,
one morning in December.
Jessie CHATS Mrs. RaymOnd), and i
had been to a reception at the club
the night before. Ye gods! but she
sparkled like a cut-glass chandelier
And there was going to the city the
next morning with just thirty-two
cents In my pocket.
/ was In the smoker when the idea
came to me.
"Pll steal Jessie's diamond neck
lace" said /.
You see. 1 had convinced myself
that three thousand dollars tied up In
a necklace was too much money.
Directly after dinner Fate drove
things my way on a gallop, for Jessie
suggested that we go down and call
on her sister Belle.
Say, Jess" said I, -''if you don't
mind, I'd sooner run over to the club
house while"
Very WELL" she replied like an obe-
dent little wife. But you'll call for
me, won't your"
Certainly, certainly, I'll drop in at
10 30 sharp" / answered.
oh, but it was easy! just walked
around the block, went in the house,
dug down In the trunk and took my
plunder.
just TO keep up the little comedy
and introduce Il realistic effect, l left
the trunk lid open and wrenched Off
the fasteners from window opening
on the kitchen extension.
Naturally, l went to Silverstein's
the first thing in the morning, and he
came up dollar for dollar. OF course,
l explained that the market was in
bad shape and 1 needed some ready
money that day, ETC., etc. Do you
know that the fellow actually wantel
to press more money on me; but the
jump from thirty-two cents to three
thousand dollars was enough for me.
Maybe l didn't take home some
flowers that night.
l invented charming fabrication
about sudden rise in stock when !
presented some roses that evening.
Well, all things come In due season.
and l felt certain things were about
due when Jess went upstairs to dress
for dinner. She said she would dress
special" in honor of my good luck
and the roses. i knew that Special"
meant diamonds.
She had been in her room few mo-
ments only when l heard her scream.
Mercy! Jess, what is it," l asked.
"Oh, oh! I'll die from laughter.
oh, but this is too funny"
what is It, Jess? Tell me ut
once"
why, I-why somebody has stolen
my diamond necklace" Then she
went Off into another fit of silly laugh
ter.
WELL" thundered. Tell me, Is
that something funny?"
"Oh, yes; it's too funny" she man.
aged to say. "They-they were only
paste"
Pastel Those diamonds paste! 7" I
howled. you're crazy"
"Oh, no, Pm not; it's too funny.
IL had n duplicate necklace made
of paste diamonds" she gurgled. ~
always knew that we'd be robbed
some day. oh, isn't It good joker"
I saw SilversteIn taking the matter
In the light OF a good joke.
"Where are the real diamonds? :?
hot ,hot Y t., z