The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1920-04-15
up the road a mile a minute.

from the Chicago packers, setting
forth their sad condition and the aw-
full hazard they are constantly running
,, by staying in business. The story has
moved US to tears, and We shall at
once write the packers letter Of con-
dolence.
| While he was making his way about
his platoon one dark night bergeant
heard the roar Of &c. l, Can" over
head and Owed into a shellhole. 1t
was already occupied by a private,
who was hit fully in the wind by the
noncom's head. A moments silence
"a long, deep breath, and then
"Good Lord! is that you, Sarge?"
That's me-" THANK heavenl was
just waiting for you to explode"
1t was dawn end very chilly in camp
and one man was unable to find any
Of his outer garments. He wandered
about, asking all his mates If they
knew where they were. HAS any one
seen my b-b-b!anket?" he demanded,
and was told that no one had. "Has
any one seen my t-t-trousers? No
answer. The unfortunate soldier
scratched his head for a moment
"Well, Pm g-g-glad have on q nice
w-w-warm pair of sus-sus-suspen-
ders." :
Shed inspected every parrot in the
store, and the dealer was getting
rather tired She declared one bird :
was too green to go with the dining
room and another too red for the :
drawing room, and so on At last she
almost settled on purchase. Then :
suddenly she Asked "But is he a :
good bird? | mean, l hope he doesn't
use dreadful language" "E's a saint
lady," breathed the dealer fervently, :
Sings 'yms beautiful. 'ad some par :
rots wot used to swear crool, but if s
you'll believe me, this ere bird con- :
,erted the lot of 'em'
Farmer Turmut went to the city
or a visit and, on friends advice,
tayed at a quiet hotel On his re-
urn to the village this friend asked
low he had got on. "Rotteni" re-
orted the old chap shortly "Why,
'eren't they nice to you at the hotel?"
sked the friend in surprise. "Nice!"
I'D Turmut's tones were whitening.
Well, if you call it being nice to fool
man because he comes from the
ountry, they were. Why, the very
rst night that / stayed there they
ave me big bottle to take to bed,
nd when ! unscrewed the stopper
,ere weren't nothing in it but hot
ater"
Halo hallo!" shouted the fireman,
nswering the frantic telephone sum-
IONS.
Are you there?" came back in
veet feminine tones.
"Yes."
"Who is it,"
"This is the FIRE station you've
I'll"
Eyes, ! know. Ny front garden
ms along the side Of the Bigflames'
use. Now, only today l sprinkIcd
me fine new grass seed on my lawn"
"This amt gardeher's!" roared
e fireman.
II know! know! / know! But I
mt to say that as my garden is my
rticular pride"
"Wot's it j got to do with us?"
'Oh, well, the Bigflames asked me
tell you that their house was on
e, so don't let your nasty firemen
But he was gone!
An Emmett man may be entitled to
'at credit for not bringing suit for
orce. While digging flower beds
his wife the other day, he saved
the good looking angleworms for
ertain purpose you may be able to
IS, and put them in an old lard can.
the time the garden was finished,
lard can held rich treasure. A
days later, the fever came upon
|, and taking certain rods and lines
uhar to his hobby, he sought the
-