The Washington times., 1920-05-05

Two Breakfasts a Week .
Fewer Breakfasts Later.
Don't Mix the Jobnsons.
Spare Your Heart.
d. ARTHUR BRIsBANE

0y AMTHUh bhiSbANE
! News that will interest men
and women is Fanny Hurst's an
nouneement of her trial marri-
age" with jacques S. Danielson
and her "two breakfasts per week
plan"
AL through the ages there have
besn trial marriages, most Of them
rather trying for the wife. Our
ancestor of the Stone Age married
Q young woman; when she got a
little old he married another.
Later he had two old wives hitched
TO the plow made of a sharp piece
of wood, the latest young wife
holding the plow and driving the
two old wives. An interesting
picture Of that is in Reclus' book
Man and the Earth"
Solomon tried an experiment
with thousands of wives and con-
cubines. Whether he breakfasted
with all or none Of them We don't
exactly know. p.
Miss Hurst has a theory that
too many breakfasts spoil the mar
riags. She and her husband live
apart, send notes when they want
70 SEQ each other, and meet for
breakfast about twice o week.
The announcement would seem
70 indicate that in the latest trial
marriage the husband is on trial.
That's an Improvement on the old
system.
Just how it may work out with
geniuses, like Miss Hurst, au-
fAoress, and Mr.. Danielson, musi-
cian, Is not for ordinary mortals
70 say.
II may be that to have break
fast only twice week with your
husband, II you happen to be a
genius. Is wise. We should say
that two breakfasts with Cleo
patra would be plenty.
For the ordinary mortal it
would mean that breakfasts would
grow fewer and fewer as time
went by.
With ordinary human beings it
is the breakfast every morning,
dinner every, night, the feeling
that one person at least will al
ways be there and always reliable,
that makes married life worth
while.
When Burns wrote "John An
derson" he did not write:
"John Anderson, my 10, John,
Wien we were first acquent
We breakfast twice a week to-
gether
And skipped the other five days"
John and his wife went up the
hill when his locks we're "like the
raven" and they went down the
hill when his locks were "Eke the
snow" and they slept together at
the bottom Of the hill when it was
all over. d..
That sounds very old-fashiohed,
but 1t will still be the fashion ten
thousand years from now. One
thing worth while is the absolute
confidence of one other human be-
ing. Two breakfasts a week won't
get it for you.
A famous orator, asked to put
In a few words the secret of his
success, said:
Remember, that you cannot
possibly cxaggerate the stupidity
Of the public, and you will have
no trouble"
He meant that you must make
things very plain, in order to be
understood.
A reader sends this note.
MANY people think that Hiram
johnson, who is running for the
Presidency, is the same as Pussy
foot johnson. Please write an
editorial, explain the difference"
Evidently the orator was right.
A young athlete, formerly of
Yale, bet that he could run up the
steps Of a building forty-five stor-
les high in fifteen minutes. There
we're nine hundred steps in the
staircase of the forty-five stories,
plus the length Of the landings.
II the young man could have
seen himself as others will see him
seen his heart, watch it work as
he went up the nine hundred steps;
if he could have seen himself as
others will see him later, when
his ill-used heart refuses to work,
he would find more sensible ways
of distinguishing himself.
Young men and old men ought to
know that any fool can abuse his
heart and make IL do wonders but
no man should be fool enough to
do it
Long hard races, especially
those In which young boys are per-
mitted to take part prove nothing
and ruin many constitutions.
What is the use Of racing human
beings, worth at least ten thou
sand dollars each as working ma
chimes, when you can buy an auto