davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1920-06-07

Oue W dil'
over -abund-I
ance of that
poison called)
uric acid.
The kidneys
are not able
to get rid of
it. Such con-
ditions you
can readily
overcome,
and prolong
life by taking
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1920-06-07

with the curse of pity?
Lo. it is the JUNE BRIDEGROOM!
Yea, it is HE, the Dreamer of
Dreams and Vower of Vows, who set.
teth forth upon the Sea OF Matrimony
and embarketh upon the Great Voyage
of Discovery!
Behold, many things shall he dis
cover. which he doth not now suspect
Yea, verify, he shall discover that
the price Of one evenings diversion
will pay for ton of coal, and that the
money squandered upon box of Per
fectos would have bought a pair OF
candlesticks and potted palm.
He will discover that GOOD chairs
are not meant to be sat upon, and
that the parlor divan is NO place fol-
a mans feet.
He will discover that not all a wo
mans hair is attached to her head
and that her hats and frocks do not
GROW upon her, but come in flow
cred boxes with bills affixed
He shall discover that he hath &C
quired the right to have his buttons
sewed on and his hose darned, but
hath lost forever the right to choose
his own amusements and rule his own
goings and comings and stayings out
at night.
He shall discover that, by wearing
an overcoat for three seasons, and
having his hats blocked and pressed
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1920-06-07

one may soon be able to afford a new
Turkish rug for the drawingroom.
He shall discover that not all the
days of a mans life are holidays, but
that here are such things as cleaning
days." moving days, rent days, birth,
Gays, family reunions and ami
versarieS.
He shall discover that many of his
cherished opinions Of himself were
merely illusions - and that to be
understood" is not always flatterins
to the soul.
He shall discover that the little love
srats of courtship, and the quarrels
Of matrimony no more resemble eacl
other than an April shower resembletl
a storm at sea.
He shall discover that matrimony
is NOT a safety-vault wherein a mar
may deposit a woman and leave hel
until he happeneth to think Of her
again, neither hitching-post where he
may tie her until he is ready to &C
home evenings.
He shall discover that theory is al
excellent thing-until it cometh to run
ming an automobile or a woman; bu
that he who attempth to conquer
THESE, requireth much practice ant
the sporting spirit of a gambler
| And 10, my Daughter, when he hail
discovered all these things, then shall
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1920-06-07

"Anuric" (anti-uric-acid). This
can be obtained at almost any drug
store, in tablet form.
When your kidneys get sluggish
ara clog, you suffer from back
ache, sick-headache, dizzy spells,
or twinges and pains of lumbago,
rheumatism or govt; or sleep is
disturbed two OR three times a
night, get DIR. Pierce's Anuric, it
will put new life into your kidneys
and your entire system. Send DR..
Pierce's Invalids' Hotel, Buffalo,
N. Y, ten cents for trial package.
ELKHART, IND.-cWhen I started
TO take Anuric the kidney excretion
was thick and cloudy, sometimes I
was disturbed fifteen times in one
night. l am advanced in years and
quite timid about taking advertised
remedies, but felt perfectly safe in
taking Anuric because I had been go
greatly helped by DIR. Pierce's other
remedies. / took one package and
my rest at night is unbroken, and con-
sequently my general health is greatly
hnproved."-MRs. S. J. ANDERSON,
No. 700 Marion Street.
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1920-06-07

Government experts have ascribed
the numerous cotton gin fires in Tex
as TO static electricity.
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1920-06-07
Mrs. Solomon Says
Being the Confessions Of The
Seven-Hundreth Wife.
BY Helen Rowland
Copyright, 1919, by The Wheeler

Copyright 1913, by The Wheeler
Syndicate, Inc.)
Who is this, my Daughter, who is
this, that entereth the tabernacle pale
and trembling, and emergeth there
from covered with blusnes and pride
and confusion?
Who is this that rusheth wildly
forth from the house, bearing three
grips and bundle of umbrellas in one
arm, and girl in the other?
Who is this that dodgeth old shoes
ana bouquets and prosecutors, and
Shaketh the rice from his collar with
murmurings and m4tterings?
Who is this that unwindeth himself
from white satin ribbons, teareth down
PIacards, and curseth all bachelors
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1920-06-07

he make the greatest and most start
ling discovery of all.
Yea then, shall he discover that he is
a MARRIED MAN!
Selah.
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1920-06-07

cises of Miss Helen Buckley, daughter
of Mr.. and Mrs. Samuel Buckley.
The wedding of Miss Lillian Werk.
OF Cincinnati, and Edwin G. Price, of
this city, will be solemnized in Gin
cinnati June &C. Mr.. and Mrs. Price
will reside on South Eighteenth
| street.
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1920-06-07

according to views expressed at the
annual convention of the Oregon state
medical association. Much that was
called appendicitis in recent years was
not at all, but plain stomach ache in
varying degrees of intensity, accord
ing to these physicians.
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1920-06-07
OH, DEAR! NY BACK !

Merciful Heavens, how my back
hurts in the morning! It's all
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1920-06-07

APPENDICITIS OPERATIONS ARE
NOT IN STYLE ANY MORE
PORTLAND, Ore, June 7-Oper-
ations for the removal of the vermi-
form appendix are going out of style,
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1920-03-25
ENTIRELY UNTITLED FOR IT
Meighty Reason Why Mr.. J. Fuller
Gloom Declined Nomination for
the Legislature.

aNo!" a trife grimly said J. Fuller
Gloom, in reply to the tender of the
committee. II am not now, have never
been, and never shall be, q candidate
for the legislature. At the age Of twen-
ty-fye years painful experience
caused me to abandon the idea that
The world owed me a living, at thirty
I lost my strut, at thirty-lye ! ceased
to think I was smarter than my fellow
men, at forty / gave up expecting
something for nothing, at fortyrfiye
desisted from talking when I had moth
ing to say, and at ffty-ive I became
convinced that honesty was the best
policy. / have never been q liar. My
abdomen does not protrude. ! have
always been able to make a living and
at the same time hold the respect d
those who know me. On these &C
counts, and others I might name,
decline without thanks the invitation
to accept the nomination. Good after
noon.-Kansas City Star.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1920-03-25
vsnetation In the Sahara.

The Sahara has been incorrectly
represented as an immense expanse
composed Of shifting sands receiving
no rain whatever, and entirely desti.
tute of vegetation.
The Sahara Is. to be sure, a very
dry region; but 1t does rain there.
It also contains a number Of wells or
pools of water-without mentioning
the mer Ghedirs. Temporary
ponds or water holes, spots where
rain water stands for a certain length
Of time" But for many centuries
these wells have received no attention
Another legend which does injus-
tice to the Sahara Is that this i'm
mense expanse is entirely deprived Of
vegetation; but the largest portion OF
this immense surface proclaimed as
a desert in reality possesses a plant
life which Is quite various and often
very abundant. It contains numer
GUS pastures and some pieces Of wood.
land, even outside the oases.-Scien
tiic American.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1920-03-25
HE MIGHT CHARGE FOR A LOOK
Certainly, at Price Druggist Wanted
for Oil, a Little Should Go a
Long Way.

Recently, n cold morning, several
women were waiting in a North side
drug store until the street a came.
A cnlored woman entered and asked
the druggist for a certain kind of oil.
He went to the rear Of the store
where he kept the stock, and coming
back, said: "It is 1925 an ounce,
How much do you want?"
The colored woman was plainly dis
concerted at the high price. After
a seconds hesitation her face brights
ened, as she said earnestly: ."Maybe
"a drop would be enough"
Just as seriously the druggist re-
piled: Lady, we don't sell It by the
drop"
The ludicrous side Of the situation
struck the women spectators and they
began to laugh. One Of them re-
marked; "Well, at that price ! think
a smell would be Standardization
apolis News.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1920-03-25
HOMELESS!
Constipation, Headache.
Colds, Biliousness. driven
out with "Cascayets"

Drive away those persistent enemies
Of Observation-Disclosures and consti-
patton. Don't stay headachy, sick,
tongue coated, sallow and miserable
Never have colds, Indigestion, upset
stomach or that misery-making gas
Feel splendid always by taking Gas
carets occasionally. Cascarets never
grippe, sieken or inconvenience you like
Calomel, Salts, Oil or nasty, harsh
PILLS. They cost so little and worh
while you sleep.-Adv.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1920-03-25
DOCTOR ADVISED
CHANGE OF CLIMATE
Run Down and Lungs Hurt-Staycd
Home and Gained 22
Pounds.

ssTn November, 1911, I had a severe cold
and la grippe, which left me with a bad
cough. My lungs and shoulder blades
hurt SO I couldn't sleep and / finally had
to give up my job and was ordered to
change climate. In April, 1912, / began
taking Milks Emulsion. On the second
bottle I could see q change. My appetite
wa better and / commenced to gain
strength and weight. Now (Augnst %,
1879 / have used % bottles, have In
creased % pounds in weight and believe
I am permanently cured."-W. F. Bour-
land, Route 6. Wolf City, Texas.
Mr.. Bourland was fortunate in COM
mencing to use Mills Emulsion when he
did. A rundown system invites disease.
Milks Emulsion costs nothing to try
Milks Emulsion is a pleasant. nutritiyf
food and a corrective medicine. 1t re-
stores healthy, natural bowel action, do.
ing away with all need of pills and phys.
lea. 1t promotes appetite and quickly
puts the digestive organs in shape to as
similate food. AS a builder of flesh ane
strength Milks Emulsion Is strongly rec.
commended to those whom sickness ha:
weakened. and is a powerful aid In resist
ing and repairing the effects Of wastint
diseases. Chronic stomach trouble ant
constipation are promptly r~elieved-usu
ally In one day.
This is the only solid emulsion made
and so palatable that it is eaten with
spoon like ice cream. Truly wonderful
hor weak, sickly children.
No matter how severe your case, yo'
re urged to try Milks Emulsion unde
his guarantee-Take six bottles bonn
With you, use 1t according to directions
md II not satisfied with the results you
money viii be promptly refunded. Pric
eOc and $40 per bottle. The Milks Emnl
sion Co., Terre Haute. Ind. Sold by drug
Rists everywhere.-Adv.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1920-03-25
How About YourC atarrh?
Do You Want Real Relief?

porarily clear them away, they
will promptly re-appear until their
cause Is removed.
S. S. S. is an antidote to the mil
lions Of tiny Catarrh germs with
which your blood is infested. A
thorough course Of this remedy
will cleanse and purify your blood,
and remove the disease germs
which cause Catarrh.
For free medical advice write TO
Chief Medical Adviser, 101 Swift
Laboratory, Atlanta, Ga.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1920-03-25
Uneasy slumber.

"The man who wrote Pangs of Vir.
tue the most successful play of the
season, slept on a park bench last
summer"
"He did, ehr" replied the crusty
old gentleman. well, he has moth
Ing on me. I slept through his infer
nal play in an uncomfortable theateI
seat and paid the price Of a room and
bath for the NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS.
Age-Herald.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1920-03-25
Foxy Pa.

"Mr. Blank must favor Toms suit
for his daughters hand; he's invited
Tom to dinner"
"That's where you're mistaken. His
daughter Is keeping house now, and
he thinks when Tom tastes her cook
ing that will settle it."-Boston
Transcript.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1920-03-25

Doesn't hurt a bitl Drop a little
Freezone on an aching corn, instantly
that corr stops hurting, then you lift
it right out. Yes, magtcI
A tiny bottle Of Freezone costs but
a few cents at any drug store, but is
sufficient to remove every hard corn.
soft corn, or corn between the toes,
and the calluses, without soreness OF
irritation.
Freezone is the sensational dis.
coyery Of a Cincinnati genius. It Is
wonderful.-Adv.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1920-03-25
RECIPE FOR GRAY HAIR.

To half pint Of water add ! OF. Bay Rum,
q small box Of Barbo Compound, and x
q. Of glycerine. Apply to the hair twice a
week until it becomes the desired shade.
Any druggist can put this up OF you can
mix it at home at very little cost. 1t will
gradually darken streaked, faded gray hair,
and will make harsh hair soft and glossy
It will not color the scalp, is not sticky OF
greasy. and does not rub of.-Adv.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1920-03-25
His Superiority.

His Superiority.
what kind of a fiddler is that there
big young son-in-law Of Gabe Gun
der's?' asked an acquaintance.
"Finest In the land!" replied a citi-
zen Of Straddle Ridge. "You know,
it had got so most every time a
stranger showed up at a dance he
thought he had to whip the fiddler
some time during the function. And
prob'1y he done so. But, by cripes,
when they jump onto this young fell
Ter they take a-nuther notion right
sudden. He lays his fiddle down,
whips the gent and then begins saw
ing again right whur he left off,
Kansas City Star.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1920-03-25
Assistance Furnished.

$50 this is one Of those help your
self restaurants"
"As you see. However, the manage
ment doesn't expect a patron to do
everything for himself"
"No?1
"There r lady cashiers stationed
at strategic points to relieve him Of
his money."-Birmingham Age-Herald
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1920-03-25
I'll. cuticura Toilet Trio

Having cleared your skin keep 1t clear
by making Cuticura your everyday
toilet preparations. The soap to cleanse
and purify, the Ointment to soothe ana
heal, the Talcum to powder and per-
fume. No toilet table is complete
without them. 25c everywhere.-Adv.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1920-03-25

Management Of Coming Events.
"Why Is a prophet regarded as
without honor in his own countryf"
'Well," replied Senator Sorghum, Il
suppose politics has been politics ever
since the world began; it naturally
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1920-03-25
pouohnuts Gone to the Dog.

MY most embarrassing moment came
when 1 looked back at q bride and
groom, fell over a dog and spilled a
dozen doughnuts all over the sidewalk
know how Lots wife must have felt.
Chicago Tribune.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1920-03-25
Just His Feet.

Russell Limped into the house with
his feet In a twist and his face wear
ing evidence Of pain.
"Do your new shoes hurtT' his ia
Their inquired.
mo, but my feet do"
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1920-03-25
trusted.

The City NANNY boy, when I was
your age, / was at my desk at seven
o'clock In the morning.
His Son-That may be, pa, but |
know the business is perfectly safe
IN your hands, even while I'm away.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1920-03-25

The mantle Of charity protects a
multitude Of amateur theatrical per-
formances.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1920-03-25

From D Story-sEarlier in the day
he sent her some orchards. "-Boston
Transcript
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1920-03-25

TDen Throw Away Tour bpIuys
and Other Makeshift Treat
ment.
Whyf Simply because you have
overlooked the cause Of catarrh,
and all of your treatment has been
misdirected. Remove the cause Of
the clogged-up Accommodations that
choke up your air passages, and
they will naturally disappear for
good. But no matter how many
local applications you use to tenn
Atlanta tri-weekly journal. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1920-19??, 1920-11-16
|OUR HOUSE.
CONDUCTED By LIZZIE Q. THOMAS

pie, pear or peach for some on off
the place.
Guests go to that home and some
child is sure to come in with a treas
ure he or she has put away for just
such an offering. That family sells
lots of fruit but it is the surplus.
They keep books and could tell you
exactly what the orchard pays each
year, and each child takes an inter
est in the fruit sold because there
was not one of them stinted. Eat
all you want, but not waste" is the
rule.
I know another family. They live
in town and have always had a fine
garden, Half of it is planted in rye
every fall, and the other half is in
winter vegetables. Next spring the
rye is turned under and that side has
the vegetab les, and peas are planted
where vegetables were. There is al
ways enough sold to pay for the
money actually spent, and a little
over. There are chickens there, and
the rye and peas lessen the cost of
eggs.
At first it may be monotonous to
set down every nickel that comes in
or goes out, but it pays. Some farms
are not fenced with any idea of util
ling the by-products. If the cotton
and corn are in the same field, often
see it that way. There is not much
chance for the pasture to be used.
It's hard to get out of rut. Old
habits cling to one and are often
detrimental, but common sense should
teach one that there is better way
than to follow the same plan year
in and year out, and lose money all
the time. Mentally lazy people are
all over this land. They do not want
to stop and plan next years work
and see if their plans are going to
be profitable. If not, why not? Work
on your plans and live up to them.
Atlanta tri-weekly journal. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1920-19??, 1920-11-16

ping stumps. Huh! Keep quiet for just a
moment, and we will call the roll. Archie
and Ollie Moye, Walter Mock, Peter Con
way, Clarence Evans. Jim Childres Rhode
and John Daw, Henry Bailey, Grady Forte,
Granville Coursey; Oscar. Esker and Lonnie
Rowell, Route A. DelmOre Griffin, Bourghs
Forte Carl and Albert TrOutman, Byron
and Robert Lee Gulley, Willie Leather
wood, Arthur Boozer, Leeman Paige, Dink
Goldsmith, George Ward, Route B. Ha!
ha! The roll is called, and only few
were absent. Anyone desiring to know
the rest Of the boys names write some rainy
day. And may be they will al be present
SOUTH'S PEA 3PATCHERS.
Atmore, Ala.
P. S.-Aunt Julia, print thsi for We want
to break the record.
Dear Aunt Julia: Will you admit little
west Florida girl into your happy band OF
girls and boys? / have been silent reader
of the letter box for some time and like 1t
fine.
As it seems to be the rule I will describe
myself so here goes: Auburn hair, blue
eyes, light complexion, feet inches tai
weigh l25 pounds anaMm fifteeh year: old !;
I read and go to school. Aunt Julia think
it is nice of you to think of taking care of
an American child. 1 will do my part. Well
as my letter is getting long 1 will hush,
hoping to hear from some of the cousins.
JESSIE RICHARDS.
Altha, Fla, Route l, Box SO.
Dear Aunt Julia and Cousins: Will you
admit a Georgia boy into your happy band
of boys and girls? 1 have been a silent
reader of the letter box for long time, but
have not had time enough to write. 1 live
on farm and like farm life very WE'LL We
have been busy picking cotton down here,
but we are about done now. How many of
you cousins like music? / like it fine. and
l am also fond of books. If any of you cous-
ms would 1ike to exchange some books,
please write me, as l have plenty of good
books. Let me hear from every reader of
the letter box by return mail. Hoping you
all long and happy life, l remain as ever,
your true, loving friend and cousin,
FRANK HARDY.
Tayiorsville, Ga, r. u. 1, Box "a,
Dear Aunt Jnlia and Cousinss Here comes
a little Alabama girl to join your happy
band. have been reading your letters, must
say they are all fine. For pets 1 have three
little kittens, named Louise, Lecon and
Honey. Honey is in my arms now slapping
at my pencil. 1 am not going to school, 1
have been sick with fever, but surely hope
to go soon. 1 have light hair, blue eyes,
fair complexion age eleven. Some of you
little girls write to me. 1 will answer all.
Your niece. VIRGINIA RILEY.
Evergreen, Ala, Route B.
Atlanta tri-weekly journal. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1920-19??, 1920-11-16
Chapter XLVIIT

vs. DR.. Findlay finished his ques-
ton there was notable like
ness to the plausible, suavely
persuasive Ed Dulaney of an
earlier day-had his dead wife been
there to recognize tin the express
sion which now came over the face
of 'Dr. Hathama." expert in mental
healing.
Did you ever read Dumas Hang
ing at LIE Piroche, Findlay?"
mo" The younger mans tone was
bit crisp. Evasion displeased his
scientific mind.
The older man seemed not to no.
tice. well, in closing, the author
leaves his readers at liberty to select
three versions. One appeals to re-
ligion, one to science, one to just
plain common sense. For my part, l
think two versions of explanation for
our series of mysteries will be
enough"
Something in the kindly, quizzical
expression of his companion dispelled
the irritation of Newton Findlay
while it riveted his attention.
you have just had" continued Du-
laney. "the scientific explanation. And
since Roger did not, really die, we
need not take religious theory into
consideration. Which leaves us with
our third version, that of common
sense Will you pardon friend for
assuming in words~-despite the short
line 1 have seen you and Miss Gates
together, I feel certain that my as
sumption is correct-will you pardon
me for suggesting that you put GER
tain question to RoSalie when your
relations become such as to make it
posSible?"
Newton flushed holly, furiously, in
dignantly and yet-why try to hide
from this man the glow that warmed
his heart?
The other man did not wait for his
stammered rejoiner.
Gust a moment, Findlay. I put
that badly. 1 should have merely
suggested, as one who tries feebly to
understand the intricate problem OF
human nature, that you make II easy
for Resale when she comes to you
as l think she Will come quite soon
with a confession"
Only one short scene, we will call
it "rhe Third Version"-ls required
to complete this drama OF the oulJa
board and tipping table.
The rising curtain discloses Rosa
lie holding off in eager, ANXIOUS ioV-
err with pathetically outstretched'
slim white hands. ..a4
Is "But listen, listen" she is INSIST
ing between sobs. Il tell you tLla1 =
had even gone so far as to get
wretched medium to sleuth about
and she was there-had fixed things
the day the table talked. But l
really did not know about it until
afterward. My own conduct so dis
gusted me that 1 would not listen or
see the woman-just sent her money
and dismissed her.
you believe me, don't you, New
ton? I must have been mao TO
have loved you so, for now L hate
you! Fool that 1 am! 1 hate you
because I am still idiot enough to
love you"
Who would have recognized the
calm, cool, perfectly poised MISS
Resale Gates in the dishevelled girl
Newton gathered perforce in his
strong arms.
TT is only real woman who can
hate with impunity the man she
loves" he whispered.
(THE ENID