davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington times., 1920-10-09
e. ~
WHEN A DOCTOR Is DOCTORED.

Say doctor, iOhen a doctor has
to be doctored, does the doctor
aOho is doing the doctoring, doc.
tor the doctor tho Wdy he sOdnts
TO doctor the doctor or does hS
doctor the doctor the ,Ody the
doctor 1Oho has to be doctored
pants to be dOct0red. PECK.
The Washington times., 1920-10-09
Alexandria sign:
AUTOMOBILES REPAIRED
&
FORDS FIXED.

She wears her bobs
And has her hobs,
Especially roiI-top hose,
She blacks her brows,
Keeps late houra.
And puts powder on her nose.
MRS. n. W.
The Washington times., 1920-10-09

All good Rumhammedans are
bowling toward the Yeast looking
for the second coming Of Allah
Kohol. The old boy is booked for a
comeback by the powers that
oughn't to be.
Rumhammed il not his only profit.
When you spot q funeral in Potter's
Field you know that Allah Kohol
has the ticket privileges. At all
barroom brawls. drunken murders
and insane crimes. Allah Kohol Is
the concessionaire.
This is the second year Of tho big
drought and John Barleycorn Is
looking for the big flood of rotgut
and poison that Albany has prom
ised us. New York used to be
Johns town. When the alcoholic
dam breaks. John will send a mes
senger on a dead horse to warn the
widows and children of the sooth-
ing tidal wave Of booze that will
float them into the refining influ-
ences of our beautiful State poor
houses.
Albany hasn't been swinging
New York SO well since Allah Kohol
was gathered TO his red-nosed
fathers But when Johns town is
Johns town again. the sober tail
wags the drunken dog much easier.
Swinging an election Is difficult
when you have to poll your deleEa-
cream sodas. The back room OF a
corner glue pot is the only logical
forum for political science. When
the corkscrew IL the chairman's
gavel and the whisper behind the
hand Is the battle cry of victory.
John Barleycon's town will be
Johns town again.
Vote for Albany and booze. Give
the sidewinder back his fangs and
his poison sac and tie a muller on
his rattle. Vary the deadly monot-
ony of health and happiness and let
us have the spice that is the var
iety of diseased life.
New York's jails, hospitals and
nut asylums were built at the cost
OF millions and are now almost a
total loss. The hum of industry is
fading from Matteawan and Ossin-
ing. Vote for Albany and booze
and these factories will again be
working on three eight-hour shifts.
Vote the straight crooked ticket
and Johns town will be Johns
town again. Put your mark in the
circle marked double X.
The Washington times., 1920-10-09
ORDERING EGGS.

This summer we learned to order
eggs scrambled in this manner:
Put Adam and Eve on a raft and
wreck 'em." BOOTIE l..
The Washington times., 1920-10-09

NORMAN MARCERON writes that
he's no fashion plate" for Congress
Heights or any other place. He ad-
mits that Congress Heights is a great
place for leadership in dress. vamp-
ing and other modern specialties. He
doesn't live there any more, though.
The Washington times., 1920-10-09
HOW CITY LIFE AFFECTED HIM

A somewhat old but good story is
told about the boy who left the farm
and got a job in the city. He wrote
a letter to his brother. who elected
to stay by the farm, telling him OF
the joys OF city life, in which he
said:
Thursday we auto'd out to the
country club, where we golfed
until dark. Then we motored to
the beach and Fridayed there"
The brother on the farm wrote
back:
yesterday we buggied to town
and baseballed all afternoon.
Then we went to Ned's and poker
ed till morning. Today we muled
out to the cornfield and geehawed
until sundown. Then we suppered
after which we piped for a while.
After that, we staircased up to
our room and bedsteaded until the
clock fived."
JAMES z. LLOYD.
The Washington times., 1920-10-09
Bugs Baer
Johns Town.

All good Rumhammedans are
bowing toward the Yeast looking
for the second coming of Allah
KohoL The old boy is booked for a
comeback by the powers that
oughn't to be.
The Washington times., 1920-10-09

AS Uncle Sans trained war pig
cons are out of a job, why shouldn't t
he give the MALE CARRIERS jobs
in the Postoffice Department?
HARPER'S FERRY.
The Washington times., 1920-10-09

kissing a woman is like get
ting olives out of a bottle. Get
the first one and the others come
easy. WHIZ BANG.
The Washington times., 1920-10-09

Albany hasn't been swinging
New York SO well since Allah Kohol
was gathered TO his red-nosed
fathers But when Johns town is
Johns town again, the sober tail
wags the drunken dog much easier.
The Washington times., 1920-10-09

Vote the straight crooked ticket
and Johns town will be Johns
town again. Put your mark in the
circle marked double Y.
The Covington leader. (Covington, Tenn.) 18??-current, 1920-09-09
PAYS TRIBUTE TO
"A FORMER TIPTONIAN

E. G. Boyd, Of Clarksdale, Miss,
one Of the victims Of an automobile
accident which occurred at Clarksdale
about 10 days ago. died on Tuesday
evening at the Presbyterian Hospital
in Memphis.
Ed Boyd was Al years Of age, son
Of the late Capt. Alfred Boyd and
Mrs. Kate Whitley Boyd and was
born and reared in Upton county. He
was splendid young man, generous.
genial hospitable. Of excellent BUSH
ness qualities and one of the most
popular statesmen in the Mississippi
delta.
Seventeen years ago he was united
in marriage to Miss Bessie Tate, of
Bolivar. who, with one son, and one
daughter. survives. He is also sur
vived by his mother and three broth
ers, DR.. J. j. Boyd. Of Covington:
Robert Boyd, Of Washington, and
Graham Boyd. of Brownsville.
The funeral services were held
Thursday morning from the residence
Of Mr.. Knox Tate. Rev. S. G. Ware
officiated. The interment was in
Polk cemetery.
The floral tributes from friends in
Clarksdale, Covington, Brownsville,
Memphis and Bolivar were magnifi-
cent and numerous.-Bolivar Bulle-
tin, September 3.
The Covington leader. (Covington, Tenn.) 18??-current, 1920-09-09
MARRIED COUPLES
CAN GET HOMES


ANY young married couple can
make sure Of a home by this simple
plan:
IT, at the time Of marriage the
head Of every family viii lay aside
$40 a month, investing it in Treasury
Savings Stamps or Treasury Savings
Certificates. which yield something
more than four per cent per annum,
he would have:
In five years. ol0.0U
In ten years. l,45l.oO
In fifteen years ...--....~.. z,49o.aV
n twenty wears. ................ 3,715.20
If he would save $40 per month he
would save double the amount. viz:
In five wears. ..4..L-..............S l,35l.20
In ten years.-.---..,--.---.,-....- z,999.z0
In twenty years 1,a3O.4O
This is figured on basis Of only
four per cent. If you wish to make
larger profit, when you get sums
of 500 and over saved up you could
buv government bonds, Victory Notes
of Treasury Certificates of Indebted
ness at prices yielding about six per
cent and the accumulation would be
much more rapid.
For example: Ten dollars month
at Six per cent. would in five years
amount to S716.40 instead Of S675.6O.
In 10 years it would amount to
81 676.4O instead of 81 ,49760; in 15
wears it would amount to S2,96O.4O
instead Of S2.498.40; in 20 years it
would amount to $4,668.S0 instead Of
$3.715.20.
Now while interest rates are high
there is excellent opportunity for ac-
emulation by monthly saving put
out at six per cent. as fast as SlOO
or more has been accumulated.
For accumulation in $500 amounts
there Is nothing better than Treasury
Savings Stamps, which may be bought
weekly or monthly. or as often as
convenient. Twenty Of these Savings
Stamus NAV be EXCHANGED for a.
500 maturity value) Treasury Saw
ings Certificate Of the sarae series,
hearing the same rate Of interest and
convenient for registration to protect
fhe owner from loss in case the GER
tificate should be destroyed or lost.
A great advantage of these certi-
ficates is that thew compound their
interest automatically as fast as it
accumulates.
You can insure the education OF
your children by adopting the same
method we have suggested for the
purchase of a home Put aside $40
4 month from the time your boy or
GIRL is born and by the time they are
through with high school YOU will
have enough to put them through
four years Of college.
The Covington leader. (Covington, Tenn.) 18??-current, 1920-09-09
SQUATTERS DESCEND
UPON BAYOU LAND

A dispatch from Blytheville, Ark,
to the Memphis Commercial Appeal
under date Of September 2 says:
Like a swarm of seven-year To-
Gusts and by prec0ncerted arrange
ment almost 100 souatters today des-
cended upon the banks Of Pemiscot
BAYOU in Mississippi county from
Little river to the Missouri line.
Tents dot the land living within the
meandering line of that devious
stream and a Cripple Creek-Okla-
homa homestead rush is on. Spurred
bv the formation of a settlers rights
organization, the land hungry gentry
have girded up their loins and come
over INTO this new canaan which, like
the canaan Of old. abounds in milk
and honey, for within the appropri--
ated area are nearly 1000 acres OF
the most fertile land in the delta,
much Of it in a high state OF cuiti-
walton.
The recent arrivals lay claim to the
invaded acres on the theory that
when the government many years
ago surveyed the IdIluS III blilS 1oSaA
ity, it's agents did not include
those lands when inundated by the
waters Of Pemiscot bayou and hence
when under the sunk land grant the
surveyed lands were decided to the
State of Arkansas title did not pass
to the disputed area. 1t is claimed
that this area. though covered with
water then, has since become firm
soil. owing to recession Of the water
to the present narrow channel Of the
bayou. :.
As considerable of the seized land
is adjacent to the corporate limits,
Blytheville today presents the ap-
pearance Of a beleagured city with
the tents Of the invaders pitched just
outside her gates. Irate land owners
are thoroughly aroused over the
threatened loss of their valuable soil,
and several local planters have re-
vised their estimates Of early auto
mobile purchases from Packard pro-
portions to Ford figures.
The Covington leader. (Covington, Tenn.) 18??-current, 1920-09-09

lures.
The passing Of the everglades Of
Florida has been a great loss 10 the
world in some ways. In a like man
ner would the dismal swamp and
Others Of smaller moment be missed
from the maps. They are natures
ereation-for some purp0se-and
possibly have a bearing on the econ
oinv Of the country. Why should not
many Of them as well as the Mann
moth Cove Of KENTUCKY be preserved
by the government and not be pro-
iected for commercial purposes I
There Is plenty Of land for agricul-
tural needs for many generations 70
come. We have no excuse 70 offer
for such sentiments.
The Covington leader. (Covington, Tenn.) 18??-current, 1920-09-09
eREAr sWAMPg oF THE soga

George Madden Martin has recently
published a book. some Of the SCENES
Of which lie in one Of those big
island swamps in South Carolina that
are familiar to many Of US. These
dense morasses have a fascination
something akin to the peaks Of high
mountains; something mystic per-
tains to them. While on the noun
tain top one can see vast regions Of
country sweeping away in the dis
tance, the antithesis prevails when
closed in by hugh cypress trees and
water and semi-darkness, turtles,
snakes and alligators; hidden feel
ing envelopes one when shut in from
sunlight and the outer world. with
deer and other wild things around,
the last asylum for many wild crea-
The Covington leader. (Covington, Tenn.) 18??-current, 1920-09-09
ExECUTRIx's NOTICE

All parties indebted to the estate
Of L. E. Greer must settle same with
me and all parties holding claims
against said estate must present
same, properly authenticated, within
the time prescribed by law. or they
will be barrtd.
(2sep2w) Executrix.
The Covington leader. (Covington, Tenn.) 18??-current, 1920-09-09

Mrs. L. T. Scobey Of Memphis.
spent Thursday night with her son,
Mr.. w. H. Scobey.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1920-09-19
64-In. MerceriZed Damask
s'.s9 Value, at $1.19Yard

64nch Extra Fine Quality Mercerzed Table Damask,
launders and equally we'll the linen damask In
variety OF neat pretty patterns An opportune time supply
your tablecloth needs.
S8nch YarnMercerized Table splendid wearing
%o fsn s9 s ysd In an Of neat soc
zoxzo Mereerzed Damask Table Napkins neatly hemmed
sorted patterns Limit dozen. Mill seconds of
aodebrx' Floor
The Washington times., 1920-06-27
By Lady Duff. Gordon ("Lucile,")
.HE time has long passed when one could
say with any truth "It doesn't matter

THE time has long passed when one could
say with any truth 1T doesn't matter
- what we wear for outdoor sports"
II does indeed meter . great deal. The
wave Of daintiness in apparel has reached
even to the garments worn for out-ofdoor
recrsstion and relaxation Even the skirt
and swester In which one lounges in ham.
nook Or stretches ON the lawn while she
tickiss her nose with blade Of grass should
b neat and whole and possessing chic or
smartness-
The specimen which you see on the large
ogurs In the middle OF the page shows how
fresh and dainty . sports dress can be.
This sesshors sport frock is q one-piece
gown OF crepe de chine. II is made on sim.
pie lines, being almost straight. Slight darts
Sre- taken low In the waist on either side.
The Washington times., 1920-06-27

There is an inset In the front Of the dress
Of contrasting material The wide, Dat
girdle is composed Of both materials. the
crepe de chine OF the dress and the silk
employed for the inset The sirdle has
short sash ends on one side. Tho sash
ends are fastened by long silk fringe reach
ing nearly to the hem OF the skirt, The
Tam O. Shanter is Of Ansora cloth. trimmed
with interlaced rows OF nat straw In two
contrasting shades.
On the left hand you see . model OF .
country sport coat The coat In . short,
belted one, with short sleeves and sligbtly
open In front, showing the white lace blouse.
The coat is Of silk duvetyn. It is trimmed
about the skirt with four rows OF sst silk
braid. The belt Is adorned with q double
row OF the braid. 4 Down the front and about
The Washington times., 1920-06-27

the threequarter length sleeves is the braid
arranged In single rows. With this is worn
q skirt of heavy outing flannel of the wash
able sort.
The last OF the group OF three pictures is
that OF o ribbed duvetyn motor coat The
fulness Of the coat is gathered upon q deep
yoke. The long sleeves are full and wrinkled,
like Yvette Guuberts famous black gloves.
The skirt Of the coat is cut away In the
front and finished in points on the sides. The
collar. is a wide, rolling one. The coat hsuFs
loosely from the shoulders, being fssteuo0
only by two large buttons, Its occurrences
The Washington times., 1920-06-27

is relieved by Q gorgeous. many-oolorsd
lining of foulard. The hat worn with II u
OF silk straw, fashioned into q draped tur'
ban and trimmed with small silk bow.
Sports clothes are growing more and more
handsome Great care is taken that they
be smartly cut for elegant effect. But equal
care is taken that they be OF substantial,
preferably dark colors for service, and that
the material be not too quickly perishabie.
b. A striking. note OF the new sports clothes
IA their ornateness. For instance, note the
lace collar aud cuas 90 The gown reproduced
IN the middle ~ IBIS page
The Washington times., 1920-06-27

I ADY DUFF GORDON. the famous "Enele" Of Lon.
don. and foremost creator Of fashions in the world.
writes each week the fashion article for this newspaper.
presenting all ha, newest and best styles for wedessed
women.
Lady Duff Cordons Paris establishment brings her into
close touch with that centre Of fashion.
Lady Duff Gordon. American establishments At Nos.
81 and 80 West Ffysevenh street. New York. and No.
l400 Lake Shore Drive Chicago
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1920-04-22
AID YOUR ADVERTISING

Mr.. J, o. Springer. Manager ouroh
Dros.' sters. Points Ways to Help
Publicity Ad Club Committees
For Year Appointed President
Holmes, Of Drake, to Speak.
Pointing out aids to advertising
that can be given by the thoughtful
merchant, J. o. Springer. manager of
Burch Bros local store. spoke be-
fore the members Of the Ad Club
Wednesday night. His subject was
Craftsmanship and Advertising"
Standing committees Of tho club for
the year were announced and a
chairman of each was named. The
next meeting Of the club 10 to be ad-
dressed by President Arthur Holmes,
Of Drake University. Des Moines,
who will speak on retail Selling"
Too many merchants. said Mr..
Springer. invest money in adver-
Using but fail to couple to It eff
cheney in salesmanship. The first aid
to successful advertising, and the
chief assistance to publicity is the
entire and complete cooperation OF
the sales force. Salespeople. he said,
who do not know what the store Is
offering In Its advertising, are poor
aids to that publicity.
He pointed out the vital need OF
the store owner carefully coaching
his sales force in advance about what
was to be advertised. the selling
points, questions Of quality. value
and all the details on which to close
the sales after the newspaper
publicity had brought to the store
the prospects. Without such aid, a
great deal of money invested in the
advertising is lost. With 1t, the maxi
mum benefit to the store Is gained.
is wholly successful II properly
is wholly successfully II properly
managed. and carefully planned. The
talk was a careful and thoughtful
analysis Of the twin forces of adver-
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1920-04-22
Careless ShampO0ing
Spells the Hair

Soap should be used very carefully.
II you want to keep your hair look
Ing It's best. Most soaps and prepared
shampoos contain too much ailxal,.
This dries the scalp. makes the hair
brittle, and ruins Il.
The best thing for steady use Ia
Mulsified coconaut oil shampoo
(which is pure and greaseless.) and Ia
better than anything else you can
use.
One or two teaspoonfu's win
cleanse the hair and scalp thorough
ly. Simply moisten the hair with
water and rub 1t in. 1t makes an
abundance OF rich. creamy lather.
which rinses out easily, removing
every particle OF dust. dirt, dandruff
and excessive oil. The hair dries
quickly and evenly, and it leaves the
scalp soft, and the hair fine and silky,
bright, lustrous, fluffy and easy to
manage.
You can get Mulsified coooanut Oil
shampoo at any pharmacy. It's very
cheap, and few ounces will supply
every member Of the family for
months.
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1920-04-22
BANGOR WOMAN DIES.
Mrs. Asenath Green Dead Of Cancer
After Years Sickness.

Mrs. Asenath Green Dead Of Cancer
After Years Sickness. -.
Mrs. Asenath Green. wife of NJ. H.
Green, a well-known woman of near
Bangor. died of cancer Monday fol-
lowing sickness Of year. For sew
cral months the family has known
that Mrs. Greene's case was hopeless.
Mrs. Green had been a. resident of
the Bangor neighborhood for sixteen
years. .a r
She was born Asenath Hooker in
North Carolina, Nov. 16, 1857. She
was married to NJ. H. Green at Ell
dora, Oct. 9. 1881. Mr.. Green at that
time was station agent employed
by the Northwestern. After Mr.. and
Mrs. Green were married they went
to Stratford to live and later, wn.e
Mr. Green was employed by the rail-
road, they lived at Clifford, Rushville,
Neb., and Buffalo Gap, s. D. When
Mr.. Green left the service of the
railroad, the family moved to farm
naIr mile east or Bangor, where
they have lived since then.
In addition to the husband i've
children survive their mother. They
are r. C. Green, Columbia Falls,
Mont, L. H, Green, city; Mrs. Louis
Davis, Clemens; and Mahlon L. and
Miss Ruth Green, Of Bangor One
child died in infancy. The following
seven brothers and sisters are also
living: L. H. Hooker and Mrs. A. p.
Winslow, city; Mrs. Henry Keeler
and pohn Hooker Albion; Harris
Hooker. Greentown. Ind, Joe Hook
er, Greenfield, Ind, and Mrs. Emily
Green, Kokomo, Ind.
The funeral will be held at the
Friends church at Bangor at 2
o'clock Friday afternoon. Burial will
be in the Bangor cemetery.
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1920-04-22
See What 1t Does

Present the coupon for To-Day Tube
Use like any tooth paste. Note how clean
the teeth feel after using. Mark the absence
of the Shiny film. See how teeth whiten
as the fixed film disappears.
Watch the results and read the reason
for them. Compare this new method with
the old. Then adopt for yourself and have
your children adopt the method which seems
best This is of lifetime Importance to you.
Cut out the coupon SO you won't forget.
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1920-04-22
BAD COUGH; NIGHT
SWEATS:L0ST WEIGHT
Mr.. COLEMAN THOUGHT HIS
TIME HAD COME. BUT HE'S
WE'LL NOW.

II was taken with dry, hard
cough about months ago. Finally l
got so sore across the chest l could
hardly breathe: had night sweats SO
bad everything would be wringing
wet. and coughed continually until
thought it would kill me. Had no
appetite. spent over 500 on doctors
and medicines. and was worse off
than when ! started. .a
1.-THE first bottle OF Milks E1nuIsion
did me more good than all the 500
spent for other treatment. It soon
gave me a good appetite, my cough
left me, and have regained the flesh
and strength I had before I was
sick" Arthur Coleman. Box s91,
Helena, Ark.
! You need an appetite, a good stom-
ach, and some real strength IL you
want to fight off disease. Give Milks
Emulsion trial at its makers risk.
Milks Emulsion is a pleasant, nu-
tritive food and corrective medi-
cine. It restores healthy, natural
bowel action. doing away with all
need OF pills and physics. It promotes
appetite and quickly puts the diges-
tive organs in shape to assimilate
food. AS builder of flesh and
strength, Milks Emulsion is strongly
recommended to those whom sick
ness has weakened and Is a power
full aid in resisting and repairing the
effects Of wasting diseases.
This is the only solid emulsion
made, and 70 palatable that it is eat
en- wilma spoon like Ice cream. Truly
wonderful for weak, sickly children.
No matter how severe your case,
you arstnrged to try Milks Emulsion
under this guarantee-Take six bot
ties home with YOU. use 1t according
to directions and II not satisfied with
i the results, your money will be
Promptly refunded. Price coo and
1920 per hottie. The Milks Emulsion
! Co, Terre Haute, Ind. Sold by drug
/ sists Av1rywhere.
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1920-04-22
That Film on Teeth
Can Now Be Ended in This Wav

You can feel on your teeth a Shiny film,
ever-present, ever-forming. That film is the
great tooth wrecker.. Dental science now
traces nearly all tooth troubles to it.
The film clings to the teeth, gets between
the teeth, enters crevices and stays. The
tooth brush does not end it. The ordinary
dentifrice does not dissolve it. So millions
find that teeth discolor and decay despite
the daily brushing.
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1920-04-22
Stop Theft!

Stop inert!
Back in the days when the west was
rare,
II a bad man lifted a body's mare
A hot wrath ran thru the country
side
With a quick demand for the bad
mans hide;
For a plug purloined was a hostile
deed
And it didn't square with the cow
mans creed, 3
A posse drew to the sheriff's shack
And they all fell in on the filcher's
track. y
No distance baked: to the VESTS
renown
They rode the trail till they ran him
And it wasn't fine for the bad man
Or a brief sojourn in the comfy pen.
Take it from me as from one that's
joe,
I've read Brette Harte and I ought
to know; r.
They strung him up in the leafy void,
Ard the steel came back to the own
er's fold.
But today from out of it's customed
cote |
Some rake of the rabble has frisked
my boat
The motor that is my JOY and pride,
And thirst like sin for the bad mans
hide.
The sheriff yawns and he bees to
state -
That the arm Of the law will investi-
gate,
But l know darn well that boat re-
trieved
Is never the same as the boat that's
thieved. 49,
They'll slip the pirate that wrecked
my chaise
A measly mulct or his thirty days,
Or caution him not to fitch anew
Which is what tbs sentence invites
him to.
We can tie to this as a wager, pal,
That Wen miss our cars from. the
old corral
Till the term dealt out for the
crime appears
A bit unhealthy for buccaneers.-Am-
erican Motorist