South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1920-08-20

Next sunday" said Dennis Carna-
han. "Ir be after going down 70 see
the new Coney Island that's risen like
a phoenix bird from the ashes Of the
old resort. I'm going with Norah
Flynn. and wen fall victims 20 all
the dry goods receptions, from the
red-fannel eruption Of Mount Nesu
vius 20 the pink silk ribbons on the
race-suicide problems in the incu-
bator kiosk.
WAS ] there before? was l was
there last Tuesday. Did see the
sights2 I did not.
Last Monday 1 amalgamateG my
self with the BriCklayers union. and
i'm accordance with the rules / was
ordered 90 quit work the same day
On account OF a sympathy strike with
The Lady Salmon Gamers Lodge No.
2. OF Tacoma Washington.
90 Twas disturbed 1 was in mind
and prOCllviucs by losing me job,
helm already narrassed in me soul on
account of havin quarrel "a with
NOrah Flynn a week before by rea-
son OF hard words spoken al tho
Dairymen and Street Sprinkler priv-
ers' semi-annual bsll caused by jcal-
ousy and prickly heat and that divil,
Andy Coghlin.
so, l says. IL Will be COney for
Tuesday: and IL the chutes and the
short change and the green-corn silk
between the teeth don't create diver
sions and get me feeling better, then
1 don't know at all.
"Ye Will have heard that Coney has
received moral reconstruction. The
old Bowery. where they used 70 take
your untype by force and give We
I knockout drops before having your
palm read is now called the Wall
street Of the island. The weiner-
wurst stands are required by law to
keep a news ticker In EN-; and the
| doughnuts are examined every four
years by retired steamboat inspec-
/ tor. The Niger mans head that
was used by the old patrons TO throw
/ baseballs at is now Illegal; and, by
| order Of The police commissioners the
/ image Of man drivin' an automo-
/ bile has been substituted. l hear
! that the old immoral amusements
/ have been suppressed. People who
used 10 go down from New York 10
\ sit in the sand and dabble in the
surf now give up their quarters 10
/ squeeze through turnsules and see
/ limitations of city fires and floods
painted on canvas. The reprehensi-
! bIe and degradin' resorts that dis
| graced old Coney are said TO be
wiped out. The wipin' out process
consists Of raisin' the price from 10
cents TO IS cents, and hirin' blonde
named Maudie 10 sell tickets instead
OF Micky. the Bowery Bite. That's
| what they say don't know.
'But 20 Coney goes a-Tuesday. l
! gets off the L and starts for the gilt
, term show. Twas n fine sight. The
roof gardens was blaIiu' with thou
/ stnds II electric nPhtS. and IN 2
\ Babylonien towers and the Hindon
streets was thick with people. '1'is
a true thing they say that Coney low
els all rank I seq miiliOnaires eaun'
/ Popcorn and lrampu' along with no
/ crowd. and sec eiSht- COllav-a-w eek
clOthin'-store clerks IN red automo-
biles fghtin' one another for who'd
squeeze the horn when they come 70
a corner
81 made a mistake. I says TO my
self. Twas not Concy needed. When
a mans sad It's not scenes of hilarity
he wants. 'Twould be far better for
him 10 mediate in a graveyard or e
attend services at the Paradise Root
Gardens. It's no consolation when
n mans lost his sweetheart TO order
hot corn and have the waiter bring
him the powdered sugar cruet in
stead Of salt and then conceal him
self. or 10 have ZOzOOkum. the gypsy
palmist, tell him that he has three