Albuquerque morning journal. [volume] (Albuquerque, N.M.) 1903-1926, 1920-11-08

quently be compressed into an cpl
gram. Take for example that old
bit of advice for young maidens
matrimOnially inclined: THE way
to a mans heart is through his
stomach" Tersely put. without a
doubt, but what a host of mislead-
ing directions are contained within
that well-turned phrase.
THE way to a mans heart 10
through his stomach" May l VEN
ture an humble opinion that this
bid of sage advice has been the
rock that has sCuttled many skiff
of love. Girls will try it. you know;
they will reach the mans heart.
Usually they attempt to reach 1t
through the mouth, down the
throat and via the stomach where
as the guidebook mentions neither
porcelain or palate, Many girl
otherwise unObjectlonable, even
desirable, has persisted in the be-
lief that a meal cooked by her own
fairy hands would send the par
ticular fraction of masCulinity hon
ored by her service of love into &C.
stacies, while the result usually is
commissions.
The directions are plain: through
the stomach! But" you protest.
"unless | use mouth or nose, sur
gical operation would be neces
sary." Not at all. The proverb is
older than surgical science. 1t
dates back to the days when the
stomach was considered the seat OF
the emotions. Interpreting the say
ing in the light of modern science,
the way to a mans heart is
through the emotions. Which
brings me to girls and giddiness.
Abaft my starboard window,
there is a mountain peak which
has splendid figure. l am certain
that the Golden Segment was
used in the calculations of its pro-
portions, so perfectly is it superim-
posed upon the surrounding mesa.
To the right and bit back of
it, there is a ragged peak, with
pleasing curves where its neigh
Dor has straight line, with little
twists and turns and dark spots
which suggest pine forests and
tumbling brooks. The peak at
tracts me, lures me to its play
grounds. 1t is perfectly charming;
he other is charmingly perfect,
| Which brings me again to the sub
ject of girls and giddiness.
How unsatisfactory is the usual
professional beauty Delilah Ju-
neau has a face of chiseled mar
| ble-and brain of much the same
material. Botanists have increased
| the size and beauty of the rose
and decreased it's perfume. MANY
times l have wished that biologists
could do as much for a certain
black and white striped animal
whose pelt now makes lovely
fur) This leads me to remark
that to one who has more than
eyes, size and shape have little to
do with charm. Which brings me
for the third time to the subject of
girls and giddiness; | capnot long
er delay.
The easiest emotion to produce
in man is that of giddiness. JOY,
pride and smaller feelings carry
with them an unmistakable tickling
around the pit of the stomach,
which wags have attributed to the
swallowing of a feather. 1t is plain
giddiness. Praise a man effusively,
fIatter him outrageously, carry him
up to the dizzy heights of expec-
fancy and drop him into the depths
of realization, his feelings are all
the same,--he is giddy. Giddy in
his success; giddy in his failure.
The Giddy Whirl, All Right,
Excuse me! Does "giddy" mean
to you "happiness?" l use the
word in the dictionary sense of a
"whirling in the head, state Of
wild excitement" Noah Webster
may have known the English Ian
guage but he scarcely knew the in
fluence of girls on young men, 9TH
erwise he would have defined gid
diness as ''whirling in the head
which, by its centrifugal motion,
produces a feeling of emptiness in
the stomach" Consider the stom-
ach the seat of emotions and you
will realize why the ancients con-
sidered that the way to mans
heart was through the stomach.
| How go about making a man
giddy? One girl does 1t by turn
ing away from preferred en-
brace, covering her face with slim,
well-tapered fingers, and swinging
back at the man with a lambert
eyes which seem to bare her soul
behind the network of flesh. Meth
DDS vary; the result-with me-is
always the same.
To close: this word to every girl in
| town
Don't try to cook mans heart
away;
lust turn his poor mind upside
down
| And start the sands the other
way.
DON FULANO.