The Washington herald., 1920-07-23

WIN d SldI, ludl Incdus Icduy "
serve" Now. let's see. Age 55;
married twice; Presbyterian. likes
blondes, Tolstoi, poker and
stewed terrapin; sentimental at
third bottle of wine" Yes she
goes on. I am sure can have
your friend. Mr.. Bummer. ap-
pointed Minister to Brazil
Humble says ]. And United
States Marshal was the berth
oh. yes says Mrs. Avery. 7
have so many deals of this sort
sometimes get them confused.
Give me all the memoranda you
have of the case. Mr.. Peters. and
come back in four days. l think
1t can be arranged by then
so me and Andy goes back to
our hotel and waits. Andy walks
up and down and chews the left
end OF his mustache.
"A woman of high intellect and
perfect beauty is rare thing.
Jef.' says he.
AS rare says !. as an omelet
made from the eggs of the fabulous
bird known as the epidermis.
says 1.
"A woman like that says
Andy. ought to lead a man to the
highest positions of opulence and
fame
u misdoubt.' says I. IF any
woman ever helped a man to Sc
cure a job any more than to have
his meals ready promptly and
spread a report that the other can
didate's wife had once been a
shoplifter. They are no more
adapted for business and politics.
says ]. than Algernon Charles
Swinburne is to be floor manager
at one of Chuck Connor's annual
balls. l know says / to Andy.
that sometimes a woman seems TO
step out into the kalsomine light
as the charge d'affaires OF her
mans political job. But how does
il come out? Say they have a
neat little berth somewhere as for
eign consul of record to Afghanis-
tan or lockkeeper on the Delaware
and Raritan Canal. One day this
man finds his wife putting on her
overshoes and three months sup
ply of bird seed into the canary's
cage. Sioux Falls?" he asks with
kind of hopeful light in his eye.
mo, Arthur" says she, Washing
ton Were wasted here" says
she. You ought to be Toady Ex?
traordinary to the court of st.
Bridget or Head Porter of the
Island of Porto Rico. I'm going to
see about it,
Then this lady, says to Andy.
moves against the authorities at
Washington with her baggage and
munitions, consisting OF five dozen
indiscriminatinG letters written to
her by a member of the Cabinet
when she was Is: a letter OF in
PRODUCTION from King Leopold to
the Smithsonian Institution. and
a pink silk costume with canary
colored spats.
"'well. and then what I goes.
She has the letters printed IN tn-
evening papers that match her
costume, she lectures at an infor-
NAL tea~given in the palm room
of the Baltimore and Ohio depot
and then calls on the President.
The ninth Assistant Secretary OF
Commerce and Labor. the first
aide-de-camp of the Blue Room
and an unidentified colored man
are waiting there TO grasp her by
the hands and feet. They carry
her out to S. w. B. street and
leave her on a cellar door. That
ends 1t. The next time we hear
of her she is writing postal cards
to the Chinese Minister asking him
TO get Arthur a job in a tea
store
Then says Andy. you don't
think Mrs. Avery will land the
marshalship for Bill?
"T do not says 1. 4 do not wish
to be skeptic, but 1 doubt IL she
can do as well as you and me
could have done
I don't agree with you,' says
Andy. I'll bet you she does. I'm
proud of having a higher opinion
Of the talent and the powers OF
negotiations of ladies'
I'VE was back at Mrs. Avery's
hotel at the time she appointed.
She was looking pretty and hne
enough as far as that went, TO
make any man let her name every
officer in the country. Butt l
hadn't much faith in looks, Sc 1
was certainly surprised when she
pulls out a document with the
great seal of the United States on
II, and William Henry Humble in
a fine big hand on the hack.
You might have had 1t the next
day, boys says Mrs. Avery smil-
ing. I hadn't the slightest trou-
bic in getting it, says she. 1
just asked for it,, that's all. Now,
I'd like to talk to you a while she
goes on, but I'm awfully busy.
and / know you'll, excuse me. I've
got an Enthusiastically, two con-
sulates and a dozen other minor
applications to look after. ] can
hardly find time 10 sleep at all.
You'll give my compliments to Mr..
Humble when you get home, OF
course
We'll. handed her the $500.
which she pitched into her desk
drawer without counting. I put
Bills appointment in smy pocket
and me and Andy made our adieus.
We started back for the Terri
So L. ~.rfr~ ~d