El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1920-07-03

I It Tow many kinds OF men are
II thereT" a man asked me the
other day.
spoofed him off. for women don't
offend men II they can avoid It by
lying. But for publication I'll say
there Is only one kind OF man. Some
times these men tyou viii notice that
I know some big words, even II am
a telephone GRID react differently to
external stimuli, especially when said
stimuli are women But inwardly
they are all alike.
For instance, there is the fat, jolly
bookkeeper who openly and shame
lessly makes love to me every time he
goes by. I don't think this boob
would really desert his wife and
children and elope with me, If it came
to a showdown. But I think he
thinks ne would. The reason I think
he wouldn't is because he is a COW
ard He is afraid he would be ar
rested and scandaliZed. But he makes
per asks me If 1 won't slip out some
evening to the Chinaman's, where
there are booths, and eat dinner with
him he says nobody viii ever know
it. that his wife viii not find II out
and that she doesn't understand him
and that he doesn't love her. Every
man pulls the same old gag about his
wife il you give him a chance and he
thinks he can't step out with you any
other way. 1t is usually. My wife
doesn't understand me" or my wife
doesn't love me-" or something like
that Occasionally a man who is
good looking and who can get a girl
in a Whirl does not drag his wife into
IL isn't necessary. Some silly girls
don't care whether man is married
or not.
Then there is the tall. slim sales
NO n~a
emily He is quiet, sly and slips by
my board without a word. Then /
comes the little note He is good Z
church member and wouldn't do an
undignified thing for the world But
he makes love in his own way. And
give him the opportunity and he viii
tell about what a bump-ou-a-log his ]
wife is Really you would be sur
with the wives OF the men VINO try [
to get fresh with US around the Of I
flee. In the first place, we wonder I
how they ever got wives. In the sec ]
ond place we hate to think OF how
the wives would feel II they knew the I
things their husbands say 10 US about !
them
Men think women are fools. They I
are, that's true But they know men |
a lot better than men give them I
credit for knowing. We are eco
nomically slaves for we have to l
work ourselves to death or marry. /
And we can't always be too parucu- ]
lar about what we marry, as we can't /
do the asking We have 10 select ]
what looks the best to US among the j
single ones who ask US And usually 1
the Single man is either a incoming /
young fool who doesn't know any
thing and can't make a living. or he /
is an old bachelor or old Widower I
who has some money, maybe. and /
nothing else that a woman wants.
The story book lover simply amt 4
that's all I've often thought about /
the cave man. Believe me. the aver /
age girl would not mind being hit 4
over the head by a real cave man,
provided he had a good cave to drag
her of TO after he slugEed her.
It is because the average man is
such a fool that women ignore them /
after they have children Children /
are the most interesting things in the
world But their papas are usually
The most ludicrous. They dirty up
heir faces and the house with to-
1acco and their old clothes. They eat
Ike hogs and then 90 10 sleep. They
make love TO other women and get
trunk But they expec- US to be
models Of virtue. They think because
hey feed. clothe and house US and
give Us name We ought to be their