davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Indiana daily times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1914-1922, 1920-10-14
DIAMOND Dye OLD
FADED DRAPEslEs.
COVERS, HANcINos

Each package OF Diamond Dyes con-
tsias objections so simple that any WON
an can diamond-dye old, faded garments
curtains. draperies. window hangings
chair and couch coverings, pnrtieres, ev-
erything. whether wool. silk, linen. cot
ION or mixed goods, new, rich, fadeless
colork.
Buy Diamond Dyes"-no other kind
then perfect results are guaranteed.
Druggist has Diamond Dyes Color Card
TO help you select shade desired.-Adver-
tisement
Indiana daily times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1914-1922, 1920-10-14
Meetinns

The reception to have been given tomor-
row night in the Hotel SEVERN by the
federated patriotic societies Of the G. A.
r., In honor Of William Ketcham, the new
national commander Of the g. A. R., has
been postponed indefinitely because of
the absence from the city Of Mr.. Ketcham.
The Woman's Home Missionary Society
of Roberts Park NJ. q. Church will meet
tomorrow afternoon In the church par
lors.
A card party viii be given Sunday aft
ernoon at st. Patrick's Hall by the
Young Women's Association OF st. Pat
ricks Church. Miss Celesta Graney wila
be the hostess.
Indiana daily times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1914-1922, 1920-10-14

Miss Marie Bresnahan Of washingto
Indiana daily times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1914-1922, 1920-10-14
Madeline Is a
Hand Bag

In black, brown, or navy
blue, 1t is made Of rich velvet,
striped in Pekin blue, draw
ing-to at the top by means
of a heavy silk cord. And
held together by q fancy
ieweled metal clasp of Trim
ity plate in a green gold finish.
Priced at $1O.5O-that' IS
Madeline" the bag smart
women will carry with smart
suits.
---Ayres--Leather goodA
street floor.
Indiana daily times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1914-1922, 1920-10-14
Mrs. Housewife, "
Do You KnOIU?

How cockieleekie soup derived its
name?
p What is pan broiling2
3. What is the advantage ia using
kerosene in cooked starch for clothes.
Three questions win be answered to-
morrow by the HOUSEWIFE.
Indiana daily times. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1914-1922, 1920-10-14
ANSWERS TO YESTERDAYS QUIZ
TONS.

ANSWERS TO Yesterdays CUES
TIONS.
1. Cochineal. used to give pink color
20 candies and other CONNECTIONS, con-
sists OF the dried bodies OF an insect
found upon a certain tropical cactus.
.. To saute food is to cook 1t in a fry
ing pan with n small amount Of fat. Up
to-date cooks use the word fry to apply
only TO the process Of cooking food In
deep fat
g. Attach heavy cotton goods at back
where buttons are attached to re-enforce
them. Four-hole buttons always stay
on better than those with two holes
Copyright, 1890
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1920-09-19
BREAKS C0LLARBONE ON
RANDOLPH MACON GRID
Poor Material Mt Hand for New
Coach to Whip Into

Especial to The Times Dlspatch.J
ASHLAND. VA, Sept. 10. - Facing
one OF the hardest schedules in years
and with very poor material. pros
5 9ei,s M i9r winning team at nan-
bptsht TRn dismal nrn 'a sa from C SeaaS
Marshall last year, when. with the
pest material that ever appeared on
Day t!c!d. he was able TO win only
ONE championship contest, has set the
Jackets back at least three years In
their athletic program.
Inc result OF last years miserable
hasc9 is easily seen when out OF a
squad of forty men, OF whom six
Teen We're awarded monogrums, only
one letter man has returned TO coll
leSe, and only i've members OF the
entire squad have reported for prac-
+: ii. Golf. Of Danville, Ill.,, sue
cetas CoaGh Marshall as athletic d.
rector. lie comes highly recon-
ihchutd and Is not unknown through
out me state, since for the past three
years hc has been in charge of ath-
ietics at blackstone Military Acad-
envy and the teams which nave rep
resented that Institution attest TO his
ability.
Con received his initial ironing at
the Danvi!ie. ~. High School and
i.o!s and Lebanon University, Lebanon,
"a. playing on three teams at both
schooIs. Upon leaving Lebanon Uni
fersity, he went 10 Blackstone Mill
tary Academy. Though facing one OF
the hardest propositions n Yellow
Jacket coach has ever had to contend
with. Coach Golf is optimistic and will
pat forth every effort to construct a
formidable machine with the odds
heavily against MIN. Even the most
| ardent supporters of the Methodsts
| hardly hope for u championship team
This year. as for the next few years
randolph Macon must pursue a con-
Structive policy in an effort to build
up athletics to their former standard
Although only two practices have
been held and very light workouts in
Ashland camp Vaught, formerly OF
Rando!ph- Macon Academy. and one
OF the most promising of tho new
| candidates. broke his collarbons yes
tcrday whii. falling on the ball, and
will doubtless be lost to the team
Tor the remainder OF the season. His
| loss will he kcenly felt
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1920-09-19
WHITE SOX PUSH YANKs
BACK into THIRD PLACE
$1,000 Windy City Fans See Them
Line Out 81 Hits and Wnllop
New York 10 to o.
10y Associated Press


CHICAGO. Sept. 1S.-Thc Chicago
White Sox tonight arc firmly en-
trenchcd in second place in the
American League pennant race as n
result of defeating New York for the
third straight time. Is to 9.
The game was played before the
largest crowd that ever witnessed 4
baseball game in Chicago, the at
tendance being estimated at close to
ta,oGp. During the three-gamc
Gcries II is estimated more than lOO,-
OoO persons Witnessed the contents
Cotniskcy Park was damned until the
spectators swarmcd ten deep on the
Ilaying field, making a hit into the
crowd good for only two bases.
The White Sox went on batting
hits. including six doubles and a
triple. Off the four Yankee pitchers
Shawkcy started the game for New
York, but WAS driven Off the mound
after the SoS bagScd seven hits and
scored Ave runs in one and one-third
Innings. Mosr!dge attempted TO
check the SoS and was touched for
three hits, including brace Of
doubles. which netted Chicago three
more runs. McGraw, a rookie pitcher.
succeeded Mogridg. and survived the
next inning. but in the fourth Chi
caEo launched another attack and
McGraw retired In favor OF Quinn,
after four runs had been scored.
Babe Ruth, who had hoped 10 bag
his iiftieth homer. had disastrous
day OF IL at bat. getting only a
single.
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1920-09-19
SUPERBAS, PUSHED BACK.
HOLD A F|vE-GAME LEAD
Things Still Look Rosy for Brook
1yn-Indians Seem Likely to Take
American League Pcnnant.
YANKEES SHOWED TO BID PLACE
II Indians Break Even In Next Ia
Games New York and Chicago
VIII Have Work Cut Ont TO Tie
Them.
ny Associated Press.I

NEW YORK, Sept. lS.-Brooklyn's
lead in the National cague pcnnant
race was cut TO five games over
New York today, when Cincinnati
won the last game OF the series from
the Supcrbas and New York defeated
Pittsburgh.
The Cleveland Americans made IL
three straight from Washington. and
are one and half games ahead Of
Chicago, which ousted New York
from second place by taking the third
straight game from the Yankees.
brooklyn can cl!nch first place by
winning seven of its nine remaining
games while Cincinnati and New
York, which start "A four-g game cries
At the Polo Grounds tomorrow. are
winning all of their contests. The
Giants have thirteen games 20 play,
and the Reds sixteen.
Cleveland has distinct advan-
tage in the American race, for II the
Indians break even In their fourteen
remaining games. in order 10 tie them
Chicago would nave TO win seven
out OF eleven. and New York seven
out Of ten.
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1920-09-19
SPORTS
RAY AND VARDON BEATEN
BY EVANS AND JONES

NEW YORK. Sept. 1s.-The worst
defeat ever suffered in this country
by Ted Ray and Harry Vardon. the
famous British golfers. az team.
Was administered today by Chick
Evans and Bobby Jones. the latter
pair winning. 10 up and . to play.
The match was played over the
course of the Morris County Golf
Club OF New Jersey.
Much interest centcrcd in the match
because II brought together the 1920
American open championship. Ray on
one side. and the 1920 America n
amateur championship. Evans on the
other side: Nardon was only one
stroke behind his partner in the
open tournament and Jones was a
semiflnalist in the amateur tourna-
incnt.
Evans and Jones played one of
the most brilliant team games OF
the sc"son. while Ray and Vardon
show. \ Hv effects Of their tour
through lnc West. The amateurs
set such IL fast pace that the British
golfers were able to win only one
hole during the day.
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1920-09-19
TRUCKERS LOOSEN COLTS GRIP on PFNNANT
Scott Ordered From Field
by lump" in Goth Game

DE R0IT, Sept. IS.-Ivcrett
Scott, Boston American shOrtstOp,
added the U87th to his string OF
consecutive games played when he
appeared In the Boston lineup for
three md one-thIrd innings In
yesterdays game with Detroit he
fore being punished from the field
by Umpire Owen.
In the fourth Inning bush, Rftcr
NlpKlinE md HcorinE two men,
stole second. Scott claimed he
tagged the Tiger player ns he
hoped into the snck. owen called
bush safe, md when ScOtcn pro-
tests became too vehement, unycd
him from the field.
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1920-09-19
FIGHTS WITH BROKEN RIB
Tender, OF philadelphia, Winner
Over Frankie Callahan. OF Brook
iyn, ut Cuddy's Arena.

LAWRENCE. MASS. Sept. Is.-I-w
Tender, OF Philadelphia. made short
work of frankie Callahan. Of Brook
Ign. by breaking one Of Frankie's
ribs in the second round Of sche-
du!ed eight-round bout here today
a; CudGys opcl-a!r arena.
Callahan fought through tho third
and fourth rounds. but when. at the
end Of tho fourth he notified mis- man
agcr, Benny Murphy. OF his broken
rib. Murphy refused 10 let him 90 on
with the fight.
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1920-09-19
MITCHELL WINS RUN
Gfny Assocla,ea prensl

PHILADELPHIA. Sept. lS.-Cl!n
Mitchell. 81. Christopher Clup. New
York. won the siXteen-mile run from
here, which opened the track and
field meet OF the American Legion
today. covering the distance in one
hour. forty minutes. eight seconds
g. w. Gubb, unattached. finished
second. L. n. Hill. Meadowbrook
Club. Philadelphia, took third place;
John Weiss. Northwest Boys Club,
Philadelphia, was fourth, and John
Con-. st. Christopher Club. New York.
NTH.
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1920-09-19
ST. PAUL AND BALTIMORE
TRY AssocIated Prcss


BALTIMORE. Sept. 1S.-The post
season series between the st. Paul
team, pennant winners In the Amer
lean Association. and Baltimore, pen
nant winner in the new International
League. will open in this city Oc-
October 5. Z. Q and 10. after which
the teams will go to ST. Paul.
The series will be the best in .
"
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1920-09-19
JACK JOHNSON DROPS HIS 90
FIGHT TO WIN RELEASE
Negro PuEiIist Goes to LeaycnuortI,
Prison for Yenr for Mnnn Acts
Violation.

FfOIatIOn.
CHICAGO, Sept. 1S.-Jack Johnson
former worlds heavyweight clsm-
pion pugil!st, today decided to L VII
his fight for release from convletNsN
of violation Of the Mann act. ark
prepare to leave tonight for LeaveR
worth prison to begin his sentcnc.
OF one year. He failed TO file an APP
peal.
Johnson's counsel had announced
previously an intention 10 file writ
of error and appeal the case. The
negro and his attorney appeared be-
fore District Judge George A. Car
sue that course. but when assured by
the court that his liberty on bond
would he denied. johnson decided TO
drop his fight. In addition TO the
sentence OF a year and 4 day, the
negro was fined S1.00O $500
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1920-09-19
Portsmouth,.

i . ON : s 4
|atted for Now hortcr in second.
lttcd for Schulz in ninth.
IRE by innings: ~ r..
mond 0a0o100oO o.
I;mouth ...,....l . 0 0 90 o 3-7
Inmnry: Two-base hits--Gooch,
ton, Nl6H, Parker, Post. Stolen
'-Vtox f2). Sacrifice hits-Poole,
! cr. Post. Double plays-DauEh-
ITO Stuart. Passed baIl-Pnrker.
throw-Schulz. Left on bases
mond. 6: Portsmouth. S. Bases
II Post. 2. IIits-orf McWhorter,
! . innings; off Schulz. 4 In Z inn
off Post. z in innings. Struck
I-by McWhorter. 1: by Schulz. /:
ost. 4. Time OF game. 1:45. UNI
1-Westervelt and Orth.
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1920-09-19
F Z, I.;ys condItlcn Favorable.

INNSCSE, ". Z, = sept. IN
|las w. Murphy. grand circuit
fr.. underwent m operation for
hdicitis hero today. His condi.
was reported favorable tonight.
was stricken ut the. State fair
e. E tho assss 81 thss es ssss Just
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1920-09-19
Totals As 10 81 27l1
Score by innings:

New York ...... 002002 02 81 D
Chicago .......... 3 5o511oO x-i5
Summary: T~o-base hits-Jackson.
J. Collins 90. Felsch, Schalk. Meuscl,
Ward. Three base hit-Felsch. stolen
base-Felsch. Sacrifice f. Collins.
Double playa. Collins to Risberg to
chieaso TO- on Bases sases on SSils aorS
C!cotte. 3; OF McGraw.. 2: off Quinn,
l.. Hits-.off Shawkey. Z in l-3 In
nings: OFF Mogridge. 3 in Ia inning /:
off McGraw, 3 in l-3 innings (none
out in tourth): off Quinn. S In in
n!nEs. Struck out-by Sha@key, .:
by McGraw. .: by Cicotte. 8 by Quinn,
Mild cIeotte oainr Mi9ainE
Shawkey Umpires. Moriarity and
Hildebrnnd. Time. ESQ.
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1920-09-19
PENN MUTUAL WINS

,ocial 10 Tho Times-Dispatch.l
liza DELPHlA, PA. Sept. IS
Mutual team. of Richmond, de-
ID rem Mutual team here today
e intercity insurance game.
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1920-09-19

WHERE THEY PLAY TODAY.
Boston nt Cleveland.
New York ut 81. Louis.
Philadelphia ut Chicago
washington Mt Detroit
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1920-09-19
MAN O. WAR Is WINNER
OF THE POTOMAC HANDICAP
1'hrec-fcnr-Olh Brcnkx Track Rec
ord, Capturing $4,000
tBy Associated Press ]

HANRE DE GRACE, MD. Sept. Is.
Man o War, champion three year
old race horse. won the Potomac
handicap here today, breaking the
track record by running the mile and
one-sixteen;h in minute, A As sec
onds. The old record was 1:45. The
race carried n purse of $4,000.
Man o War won easily by two
lengths. Wild Air was second ana
BlaZcs third. Paul Jones also ran.
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1920-09-19
SPORTS
Virginia League Series

First Game.
kichmond. 3; Portsmouth, ).
CTen inningsD
Second Game.
Richmond, z, Portsmouth. 1.
Third Game.
PortHmouth, 81 IIchmond, IS.
Fourth Game.
Richmond, 81 Portsmouth, o.
Fifth Game.
Rtchmond, OF Portsmouth, 2.
Sixth Gnme.
portsmouth,. ~ Richmond, 4.
STANDING OF CLUBS.
49,, Won Lost Tic PC.
r"rtn%oa,h y = .9S%
wIiEItE THEY PLAY MONDAY.
hlchmond Mt Portsmouth. Game
starts at 4 Il. NJ.
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1920-09-19
How They Stand Today
AMERICAN LEAGUE

Yesterdays RESULTS.
Chicago. 10: New York. ..
st. Louis. !; Philadelphia. l.
Boston. Z; Detroit, :.
Cleveland. !; Washington. 5.
~.
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1920-09-19
HLETICs BUY CHAMPLIN
|tstop Hurry ChRmpIin. OF Rocky
Punt Club, Goes TO Philadelphia
In Spring.

FCh MUUNT, ". C., Sept. 10
Rocky Mount club OF the Vir-
} League. today announced the
OF Shortstop Harry Champlin to
Americans. lie will
the Athletics next spring.
YoungstownskeÌ SlovenskeÌ noviny = Youngstown Slovak news. (Youngstown, Ohio) 1910-1940, 1920-05-14
90 rfsU . oEsKo-sLovEN
sKu AN1ERIUKE tAsoPIsY.

"The Plain Dealer jeden
naiva6sich dennikov Y Clevelan-
de, takto pfse . nasej CSR,
e echo-Slovakia, one Of the
new states born Of the war, has
been diligently and unostenta-
Htiously plodding along, giving
little heed to political alarmists
and none at all to prophets OF
disaster. It seems that there are
no pessimists in Cecho-Slovakia.
Already this husky young nation
has assumed self.reliant de-
meanor. There is much work to
be done, much energy to be ap-
Piled, but Cecho-Slovaks are
workers and their leaders are
men Of energetic action. Optimism
| and clearness Of vision have made
the Cecho-Slovaks one Of the
| most practical and strong hearted
Of European peoples.
Po slovensky:
tCesko-S -Slovensko, jeden 2 no.
vo-narodenych statov vojny, usi-
.Ilovne a bez vystatovania sa pra-
cuje morduje sa t'azkost ami,
dbajdc malo ma politickych pop
lasnikov celkom mic ma proro-
kov katastrofy. Zda sa, ze Ces-
ko-Slovensku MET pessimistov.
Tento vytrvaly mlady narod uz
wal ma seba seba-spoliehajlce dr.
zanie. MajH oni tam moe t'azkosti
ma prekonanie, moe potreby ma
vyvinutie energie, ale Cechoslo.
vaci s1 pracoviti ich vodcovia
cnergickeho einu, Optimislnus q
iasnost' videnia urobily Cecho.
slovakov jednym 2 najprakticke..
sieh a najsrdnatejsich narodoy
Enropy."
Slovaci, bud'te pysni ma svojr
republiku; nedajte 81 ju petupo
vat Cd l'udi, ktori "a nu mic ne
vykonali!
YoungstownskeÌ SlovenskeÌ noviny = Youngstown Slovak news. (Youngstown, Ohio) 1910-1940, 1920-05-14
KTO JE POSLANCOM v MAR
SHROMAzDENf?

Uz nam prisly noviny 20 Slo-
venska vysledku volieb. Ale e.
Ste vzdy ME $ uplnym vysledkom.
Podl'a tychto zprav SLOW. mar. a
rol 'nicka strana dostala len II
mandatov a nie Is, ako bolo uda-
vane. L'udova strana zostala ma
IA a socialist ma %. Mad 'ari do
stall 10 mandatov. Zprava je ne
uplna tom, re neudava nplny
soznam mien vyvolenych poslan-
] GOV.
Ia mar. a roll. stranu zvolenl
boil: dr.. Vavro Srobar, DIR. Jan
Vanovic, Jan Jancek, Or. Ivan
Halek, dr.. L'ud. Medvecky, DIR.
Bohus Klimo, dr.. Milan Hodza,
Kornel Stodola, Sopko, Branecky.
| lChybujn dve mena.
Ia l'udovl stranu: Florian To-
/ manek, Michal Tomik. DIR. Karol
hmet ko, or. Marek Gazik' ar
Jozef Buday, Arnold Bobok, An
dreJ Hl'nka, Jozef Vrabec, ote.
fan Onderco. Tiso, Hancko. Chy-
buJu tri mena. Ferdls Jurlga. Je.
Il = = = 4 lg I =
den z ! udackych vodcov' zvoleny
nebol; porazill no Jeho vlastnl
byvall clrkevnlcl' ~ knazskel
hodnostl Dol vyzdylhnuty pre-
vselilake vecl, ktore 90 noyln ne
patrla.)
| "a socialno-dcmokraticku stra.
nu: ar Ivan Markovlc, Andre.
! kubal, Jan Pocisk, DIR. Ivan De
rer, red. Ferdinand Benda, red
AndreJ Hvlzdak, Jan Zveree. NC
Anna Sychrayova, remes. Joze'
oktavec, oceliarsky rob. Jan Be
The Irish standard., 1920-05-01
g<{&R{[ERHF{8EEE &|||||{[EZRFEE |{|:[|E|||R|
ark, they might like it in Wood.

dark, they might like it in Wood
ville."
So of to Woodville they trotted.
and under the tree where Mr.. Owl
lived they began their music.
When Mr.. Owl heard the terrible
noise outside, he ducked under the
clothes and hid, for what was after
him he could not think.
But after a while, as nothing hap
pened but the noise, Mr.. Owl poked
out his head, and then got up. But
instead Of getting out Of the right
side Of his bed, as he first started to
do. he got out this time on the wrong
side, which made him very cross.
He ran to the window and threw it
up with bang. and Tom Kitten and
Bah Rabbit were sure this time they
were to get mouse or radish.
Each held up his hat and said {:
"Pity two poor orphans and give US
something"
"rll give you something" said Mr..
Owl, for he was cross when he went
to the window. but when he saw who
1t was he was crosser than ever.
Mr.. Owl did not wait to dress. He
few right out Of the window just as
he was, in his night cap and slippers.
and down he pounced upon the two
orphans.
He carried them up to his window,
and there ia no knowing what would
have happened If the window had
been large enough for Mr.. Owl and
Tom Kitten and Bah Rabbit to get
through all at once, but it wasn't, and
Mr.. Owl, thinking Tom Kitten was a
rabbit and could not get away, he sat
him down on a limb of the tree until
he could put Bah Rabbit inside.
No sooner did he let 60 Of Tom
Kitten than away he went down the
tree and off at his best running speed.
Old Mr.. Owl was so surprised that
he dropped poor Bah Rabbit, and the
moss under the tree was thick, and
SO when he struck it Bah Rabbit
jumped up pretty quick and ran hip
perty-hop-leap away from around Mr..
Owls home.
Tom Kitten and Bah Rabbit had a
very hard time explaining how they
tore their clothes, and to punish them
their mothers made them stay in bed
all the next day, and you may be sure
that neither of them ever again want
ed to play orphans.
(Copyright)
The Irish standard., 1920-05-01

II should not care for mice, you
know"
"Come along with me. am sure
we can get lots Of things" said Tom
Kitten.
or they ran up to the farm over
the hill, and hanging in the barn they
found an old fiddle with one string
and drum with hole in it.
1--WE will have to look poor and for.
saken If we want everyone to give us
things" said Tom. "I'll make q hole
in my coat and you tear your stock
ing"
Oh, such a sight as those two crea-
lures were when a little later they
went along the road playing the old
fiddle and the drum.
But the mice or the radishes did not
come. as they thought. Instead they
made such bad music that all the cats
in Catville threw tin cans after them.
and by night time they were two very
hungry and tired little fellows.
1--WE might try your woods" said
Tom. my family does not seem to
like our music; but when 1t is little
The Irish standard., 1920-05-01
Rann-dom Reel.
By HOWARD L RAM
SEASICKNESS

g EASICKNESS is a disagreeable
~ malady which is caused by the
stomach losing its equilibrium and so
forth. People do not always miss the
equilibrium at first, but this Is not
true Of the SO forth.
Seasickness almost always results
from coming In contact with water
which refuses to lie flat. There is
nothing more terrifying than a large
body Of water which stands first on
one leg and then on the other and
causes the apprehensive tourist to
wish that he had been carried of BY
tho mumps in early youth. It would
seem that science could discover some
method Of preventing the ocean from
rising up and driving inoffensive pas
sengers away from a table d'hote din
ner which was paid for before leaving
the dock. but it has not been able to
do 80. This teaches US that science
Is Of about as much use to the aver
age citizen rs the interstate commerce
commission.
Seaslckness usually sets in as soon
as the three-mile limit is passed, and
dies lingering death on reaching
the Irish channel. There are several
successful cures for this ailment,
however, and after man has tried
them all he will be in sight of land
and will feel considerably improved.
Many person has started on an
ocean voyage relying upon some cure
for seasickness recommended by a
friend who never got out of the corn
The Irish standard., 1920-05-01
~ THEIR day 90 veesit leetle town
~ where worka firsta Job gotta

~ where worka firsta Job I gotta
deesa country. Everybody treata me
swell cen dat place. I no been dat
town more coople days when my
frfens geeva beega cheecken deener
jusa for say hello weeth me.
l eata SO mOOcha checker feela lika
wanta lay round for mont. I dunno
where he come from seence da prohi-
bish, but we gotta somating weeth
leetle keek cen, too. catcha da hee-
cup, but he no sounda right. I eata
SO moocha checker dat hee-cup gotta
tune ALA same as de cackle.
But was jusa one ting wrong weeth
da deener. Da cook maka da soup too
thick and when we eat was preety
hard time nnaka da music.
Seence I been dat place lasa time
everything ees deefrent leetle bit.
Longa time ago know one man cen
dat town wot never buy da haircut.
And when see other night he losa da
hair. He was so bald now eef he
standa upaside down hees head looka
jusa lika shoe shine.
meeta one guy wot used to worka
weeth da railar0ad. But he gotta new
job now. He raisa beega family and
starts newspaper cen dat place. BE
tella me he gotta feefateen keeds,
twenta granda keeds and tree. four
dozen greata granda keeds. So I fee
gure he was smarta guy ALA right Eef
hees family TAXA da paper he gotta
bcega circulash ALA ready.
Wot you tink?