Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1920-03-18
THINKOGRAPHs.

Some men always tell the truth
but make it as hard to recognize as a
man IN a barber chair.
The man who on himself relies will
never lack a friend, and he'll wax rich
while helpless guys toward the poor
house wend.
Eearst's attacks upon President
Wilson are on par with the fight
the humming bird put up against tn,
Colossus of Rhodes.
The people who have to spend all
summer in Canada to keep cool and
all the winter in Florida to keep warm
are not very important to the affair;
of this world
There is one economic truth tina
you can never batter into the con-
sciousness OF bonehead, and that is,
possessing the ability to pay none
for anything doesn't justify one iii
living an idle life. The able-bodiel
individual who permits day to slid
without doing some useful work ough,
not TO be permitted to eat, even if h,
has million.
Mexican women, says refuge,
from there, are better than Mexican
men. That's nothing. That's true il.
any country. It's true right here.
And women don't have to be so all
fired good, either, to be better than
men.
The proposed tax on bank checks
is a sign that there still exists anon,
men that form of cerebral obliquit-
the possession of which by legislat-
or enables him to keep the world Won
dcring whether he is born idiot or
self-developed pale blue fool.
We have made the world safe for
democracy and now it begins to look
like we had better be hunting up some
kind OF a serum to make the world
safe from democracy. 1t is quite pos
sible for person to go crazy on de-
mocrazy, as some do on religion, or
wee-iee boards.
'Senate leaders say they will favor
only such plans for reconstruction as
may be brought to their attention by
their own constituted committees"
Tut-tut, gentlemen! What makes you
think that the country's brain power
or political economy, sociology and
material production is centered in
your your own constituted commit
tees?
Ssn Francisco has been holding
meetings at which so-called "heal-
er" prayed for and with thousands Of
sick and afflicted people. He did
nothing but pray, yet many declare
they were helped, and no doubt they
were. There is power of mind over
matter, and prayer and faith helps
that power work for good.
The congregation from Boston are
net the ones who spill the beans.
Sometimes a fellows matrimonial
nestegg matches into alimony.
Some women marry for love, some
for money, and others from force of
habit.
High society has a freckled past, a
speed burning present and hot fu-
ture.
Some congressman and legislators
are born great, and others wear but
tonhole bouquets.
There are quite a number of self
made men who need not worry about
taking out patent on it.
Even if you have the flu, it is not
necessary to blow your nose as though
you thought you were Gabriel.
If the ladies expect the men to ad-
nlire their new hats Easter, they bet
ter lower their skirts about six inches
University of California boys put
drugs into grape juice to get "kick''
out of it. They got the kick; also
doctors bills and funeral expenses.
When the ways and means commit
tee talks about socking hair-liftine
tax on the automobiles, don't you OBJ
serve how the pedestrians sit on the
curbstones and weep until the cutters
are sloppy?