The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1920-03-22
ON SECOND THOUGHT
BY JAY E. HOUSE.
tFrom Philadelphia Public Ledgsr)

lust as we had despaired of getting
a rise" out of anybody, w. H. flashes
to the surface with the suggestion that
the term ''reactionary Republican
not an epithet but an epitaph- we
congratulate w. H. He achieves
considerable result without recourse TO
verbosityN So many of those who ne
gotiate interminable journeys in the
direction of physiological effect never
arrive at their destination.
The daring of Senator Harding pro-
vokes our admiration to the point at
which we reach up and pin a rosette
to the lapel of his coat Il magnify
no posthumous claims to an intimate
friendship with Colonel Roosevelt
the senator is quoted as saying in one
of his recent speeches, and coui9
have no title to his political mantle
even IL such bestowal were possible in
this republic"
We don't know whether Senator
Harding can be nominated or elected.
We have no notion as to whether he
would make a good president But
his frank discussion of a matter which
every other candidate is trying to
straddfe has attracted the favorable
attention of a number of customers.
There is" writes one eminent pub
licists. more than one way to kill a
cat.' Buck Kilby. therefore, suggests
that all of the various methods be en-
pioyed.
A good deal of the light housekeep-
ing is predicated on the theory that a
meal is anything that can be carried
home from the delicatessen.
The Whispering Post.
The trouble with the "columyer' is
not as "Gladiolus' asserts, that he is
what is vernacularly known as a
Crouch" The trouble is that he is d
shy anemone whose reticence makes
him inscrutable to the casual observer.
But the reputation of being a crouch,
assiduously cultivated by many, saves
them much trouble and annoyance. A
crouch is not expected to sing and
dance and make merry for the edifica-
ton of the villagers. Nobody suspects
| him of playing the ukelele, and he is
| placed on no soliciting committees as
j sembled for the purpose of separating
the working citizen from his
dross. One with the reputation of
being a crouch is less frequently az
| flicted by the various human pests
| than one called upon to sustain the
/ illusion of geniality. When a human
/ pest tackles crouch the latter can
| turn on his heel and walk away with%
! out hurting anybody's feelings. 1T is
! precisely what is expected of him. The
| town cut-up never slaps the crouch on
| the back. He invariably reserves that
mark of distinction for the sunshine
| scatterers. No drunken man sobs
/ himself to sleep Upon the grouciis
shoulder; no politician buzzes in his
ear. The crouch frees himself from
many of life's petty annoyances at no
expense either to dignity or energy,
and because he spreads the converse
| tional unguent with a spaFing hand
| he generally is esteemed a great deal
smarter than he really is. Genia'ity
subjects its possessor to a continual
strain. To be a crouch is greatly to
minimize the friction of life.
Which reminds us of another of the
| inequalities of life. Had DR.. Frank
Crane or Colonel II. Addington Bruce
written the foregoing Splash" it
would have been considered literature
Editors would have We'd with each
other in paying money for it. We
shall, doubtless, have trouble in get
ting it past the Chief. 1t may not get
into the paper at all.
To our mind, however, Mr.. Hoover's
! fortissimo note is not expressed in the
| fact that he is a very able business
man. To us the appealing quality of
Mr.. Hoovers involuntary candidacy is
! that he has never tried to kiss the
| people.
! If you wish TO please a man. dance
with his wife, thus relieving him of the
| obligation to do so.
| NJ