South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1920-02-01
Man in the Street
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so distressing to the patriots who
have loved and lost
A Kentucky lady OF 60 years and
a vast accumulation OF human ex-
perience told an audience in Louis
vile that husbands were necessary
plaques Well. who plaques them.
anyway
A writer confesses that he used
drugs 20 aid him in writing popular
songs. We have fancied that most
OF the popular songs were due TO
some mental condition in which con-
science and sanity were stupefed or
suppressed
a bank robber is being tried be
fore "A California jury composed en-
tirely Of women. Well. il ne hasn't
big brown eyes. a curly mustache
and wavy hair. Wen say he's going
10 81. quentin.
Storage eggs have fallen u cents
ID dozen in Toledo. We are sorry for
every fallen egg. but there is no re-
dcmption for it in chaste circles
To viii turn out is usual that the
majority Of presidential aspirants Of
January are only perspirants in
June.
If reform has reached the point
whore humanity is an eighth Of
mile out of the clutches Of Satin,
IL might not be a bad idea TO pause
"A little and let it blow a bit and
familiarIze itself with its new envir-
onment
A local merchant sent his clerk
out OF the store one afternoon the
past week telling him he was going
10 mark down his stock. and wanted
TO surprise him when the work was
done Returning two hours later,
the clerk surveyed the new prices
and immediately tainted. on coming
10, he explained that the upward
trend was more than his delicate
constitution could comprehend.
Pussyfoot Johnson says he intends
to stay with the job until England Is
dry It's a tough job, and sometimes
we doubt that pussyfoOt's ocular e.
quipment will last long enough for
him to finish it.
Hotel Accommodations in Havana
cost $50 day and Americans are
tanning the town. The Kentucky
society Is already in action and its
members are said to be in fine spirit.
We hate 20 be suspicious, but in
view OF the ingenuity and resource
fulness OF the distillers we are
strongly tempted TO believe that the
present Influenza wave is largely pO-
litical
Chicago has an epidemic Of pneu-
mOnia. The number of cases multi
ply by the dozen, now that the doc
tors say whisky is the best remedy.
Mishawaka has awakened TO the
fact that teachers must eat. Com
munities that think teachers can live
on atmosphere and natural scenery
will have TO learn some OF the char
acteristics OF the human appetite.
The Philadelphia Public Ledger
prints the picture of two lady props
encased in a $3.50 pair OF lace stock
ings. 1t is idle 10 expect a woman
wearing that sort OF hosiery to take
kindly to long skirts.
Lady Astor says she hates the
very word prohibition" II the
fair politician will visit her old home
in America she will find thirsty pa
triots at the dock ready to kiss her
for them kind words.
If the American dollar wore a
corset and high heel shoes. it could
scarcely be less able TO do an hon
est dollars worth of work than II is
now.
II YOU want a real musical treat.
go and hear Gatty Sellars at the
Methodist church this evening The
edifice should be packed TO the cell
ing; its a free show.
7n1Or 0r 0uOro