The Washington herald., 1920-09-10
CONTINUED FROM PAGE ONE.

how much trouble you can be. OF
course. FriedChICke
porkchopshamandeggspOtpie' -
and 50 on. She called me Jen. but
there was no signifcations at
tached. Designations was all she
meant The front names Of any
OF US used as they came to hand.
Id cat about two meals before
l leit. and string EN- out like a
society spread where they chang
ed plates and wives. and josh one
another fcstively between bites.
Name stood for it. pleasant. for
1t wasn't up to her to take any
canvas OF the tent by declining
dollars just because they were
Clipped in after meal times.
1t wasn't long until there was
another fellow named Ed Collier
got the between meals affection.
and him and me put in bridges
between breakfast and dinner.
and dinner and supper. that made
a three-ringed circus Of that tent.
and Names turn as waiter a con-
tinuOUs performance That Collier
man was saturated with designs
and contrivingse He was in we'll
boring OF insurance or claim
jumping or sOmething-Tve for
gotten which. He was man
well lubriCatfd with gentiIity
and his words were such as
recommended you to his point Of
view. So Collier and me infested
the grub tent with care and ac-
tivity. Name was level full Of
impartiaHty. Twas like a casino
hand the way she dealt out her
favOurs-One TO Collier and one
to, me and one to the board and
not card up her sleeve
Me and Collier naturally got
acquainted, and gravitated to-
gether some on the outside. Di-
vested OF his stratagems. he
seemed to b. a pleasant chap. fun
Of an amiable sort of hostility.
Il notice you have an affinity
for grubbing in the banquet hall
after the guests have fled says
l to him one day to draw his
conclusions.
Well, yes says Collier. re-
fleeing; the tumult Of a crowded
board seems to harass my sensi-
tive nerves
1t exaspirates mine some,
too says !. Nice little girl, don't
you think
- see says Collier. laughing
Well. now that you mention it,
I have noticed that She doesn't
seem to displease the optic nerve
nerve
She's a JOY To, mine says l..
and I'm going after her Notice
Is hereby served
I'll be as candid as you.' ad-
mits Collier. and if the drug
stores don't run out Of pepsin I'll
give you a run for your money
thatH leave you a dyspeptic at
tho wind-Up
so Collier and me begins the
rac", the grub department lays
in new supplies; Name waits on
us. jolly and kind and agreeable.
and il looks like an even break.
with Cupid and the cook working
overtime in DuEans restaurant
Twas one night in Scptemb Der
when ] got Name to take a walk
after supper when the things
were all cleared away. We
stroIled out a distance and sat on
a pile Of lumber at the edge OF
town. Such opportunities was
seldom so I spoke my piece. cN-
planning how the Brazilian dia-
monds and the fire kinder were
laying up sufficient treasure to
guarantee the happiness of two.
and that both Of EN- together
couldn't equal the light from
somebody's eyes. and that the
the name Of DuEan should be
changed to Peters. or reasons
why not would be in order.
Name didn't say anything
right away. Directly she gave a
kind Of shudder. and l began to
learn something.
'Jeh,' she says, I'm sorrya YOU
spoke. l like you well as any
Of them. but there isn't the man
in ths world I'd marry. and there
never will be. Do you know what
a man Is in my eye? He's A
tomb. He's a sarcophagus for the
interment OF Beefsteakporkcho
liever' nbaConhamandeggs. He's
that and nothing more. For two
years I've watched men eat. eat,
eat. until they represent nothing
on earth to me but ruminant BIZ
peds. They're absolutely nothing
but something that goes in front
OF a knife and fork and plate at
the table. They're fixed that way
In my mind and memory. I've
tried to overcome il. but I can't.
I've heard girls rave about their
sweethears. but l never could un-
derstand it, A man and a sausage
grinder and pantry awake in me
exactly the same sentiments. l
went to a matinee once to see an
actor the girls were crazy about.
] got interested enough to wonder
whether he liked his steak rare.
medium, or well done. and his
eggs over or straight up. That's
was all. No. JEFF; I'll marry no
man and see him sit at the break
fast table and cat and come back
to dinner and cat. and happen in
again at supper to eat, eat, eat
But, Name says /, it'll wear
OF. You've had too much of it.
You'll marry sometime, of course
Men don't eat always