The Washington herald., 1920-02-25

A woman writes me that her
daughter is in love with a man OF
whom she highly disapproves. ana
she wants to know how she can
break off the match. for the girl Is
determined to marry her unsuitable
suitor.
| or course the only reliable method
| of preventing an undesirable mar
riage is to forestall Cupid, and pre-
vent young people from falling in
| love with the wrong parties. It's
case where an ounce of prevention
Is worth a pound of cure, and il par
ents' foresight vas only as good as
their hindsight in sentimental mat
ters. they could save themselves anu
their children many heartaches,
| Quarantine your house as rigidly
against beautiful girls, and fasci-
mating young men that you do not
wish your sons and daughters to
marry as you would against small
poX. Keep your young people as far
as possible from associating with
those whom you would not welcome
as sons aud daughters-iR-law. Fol-
| low these rules. and you are reason
ably safe from having to interfere
in your children's love affairs.
But there are times when all rules
fail, and all precautions are in vain.
and when fathers and mothers are
forced to nip some youthful fancy
in the bud to save their children
from the folly of wrecking their
lives by making disastrous mar
riages.
The great difficulty about doing
this is that when boys and girls are
in love, or think they are in love,
ora riIv insane and he
yond the reach of reason. They
cannot be argued with because they
have lost all Judgment, and all per-
spective on life. They may admit
that the argument you advance
against their marrying the individ-
uals they want to marry would be
cogent in other cases, but they are
convinced that their own cases are
exceptions.
A still further difficulty is that
love thrives on difficulties. and there
lis mo- surer way to make IA match
than to oppose 1t, and in their
anxiety and their panic at the dan
ger that threatens their beloved
child. parents are nearly always be-
trayed into the fatal step of as
serting their authority, and forbid
ding the bans. which precipitates the
calamlty tney dread.
If, therefore, you wish to break
off a match never openly oppose it,
for that puts the youngsters backs
up and makes them determined to
assert their independence. and show
that they are not children to be
dictated to. Neither be guilty of
the folly of continually harping
upon the undesired sweetheart's
shortcomings. This makes the
lover rush to the defence of the one
of whom he is enapoured, and not
only marshall his or her every
charm and good quality. but manu-
features additional ones to justify
his choice.
There are, however, many ways of
choking a cat except upon butter.
You will recall that the willy old
Major Pendennis, when called upon
to break Oft the match between hfs
nephew and fascinating but blow
sy actress, murmured as he read
over her letters. "Ah, yes. Lovely
creature. lovely creature. Adores
yeu. I see she spells affection
with one f. Lovely creature, lovely
creature"
But that one "r did for Arthur
what all his mothers tears and en-
treaties and prayers had not been
able to do.
A certain mother. whose young
son imagined himself In love with a
very common girl. was. aghast when
the boy announced his choice Of a
wife. She did not bat an eye, how
ever, when he delivered the blow
that dashed all of her hopes for him
to the ground,
Whatever is for your happiness,
is for NINE" she said. Bring VILLA
bella to stay with us at once" joy
onsly the boy brought wiIlabelIa.
but prudent mother had filled the
house with the most beautiful and
charming girls of her acquaintance,
and whep the boy saw wiiIabella.
against his BACKGROUND instead Of