The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1920-01-06
Through the
Widows Lorenette
BY HELEN ROWLAND
Copyright, 1918, by The Wheeler
Syndicate. Tnc.)
THE SPOILED SEX

thanks has been written, the Christ
mas tree Is down, and all the holiday
debris has been cleared out! Oh, il
l were ONLY a mani"
"Thanks-for the tribute!", said the
Bachelor, cheerfully ensooncing him.
self In the most inviting chair, But
don't quite SEQ tho connection"
"A mans life IL such an easy. care
free existence" explained the Widow
wtstfully. HE is never expected to
clean up things. nor pick up things,
nor find things, nor put things away.
The stage Is always cleared for his
entrance and after hts departure. He
escapes all the ugly, disagreeable. har-
rowing, little details Of life. He Is the
most pampered being on the face of
the earth!"
"Humph!" returned the Bachelor,
who goes around picking up all the
things that a woman is continually
dropping, I'd like to know-the fans.
and handkerch1efs, and vanity-cases,
and hair-pins, and hints, and secrets,
and"
"Oh that, interrupted the Widow
with a wave of her hand, THAT Is Just
a pretty, simple, little parlor- trick
that we've taught you as a sop to our
own vanity. A woman just LOVES to
believe that she is delicate. helpless
creature being waited on and protect
cd and having all the burdens lifted
of her shoulders-by big, strong man!
It's an obsession with her. But when
1t comes to genuine helplessness and
inertia-well, show me man who has
the energy and muscle to fix his own
bath or find his own clothes, If he can
get a woman to do It for him!"
"Oh we'll, II you WILL spoil us
began the Bachelor defensively.
But we don't,I retorted the Widow,
MAN spoils himself from the time
when he begins throwing his toys on
the floor for his nurse to pick up, to
the time when he begins f1inging his
shoes and cigar stubs and newspapers
around for his wife to pick up"
Perhaps" admitted the Bachelor,
but he only does 1t out Of kindness of
heart-just to humor you
What" exclaimed the widow, half
rising from the chair.
ITO give you something to do" an
swered the Bachelor, calmly blowing
rings from his cigarette, " Cleaning
up is the one grand passion Of a
woman's life. NO girl is perfectly
happy until she finds man to muss
things up around the house for her.
Why. even now, you are talking of
cleaning up nice and tidy. the
moment you get the opportunity"
The Widow leaned back and smiled
a triumphant smile.
IF we don't" she retorted, 'it will
be the first time in the history Of the
world, that woman hasn't HAD to
clean things up after mani"
"And yet" unused the Bachelor with
malicious CLINT In his eye, "did you
ever see business mans desk that
looked as much like the afterefects
Of an earthquake as the average
woman's dressing table? Did you ever
see business office that wasn't the
pink OF neatness and order?'-
NO, agreed the Widow promptly,
"But WHO keeps it that way? A
charwoman comes in at night and
cleans up all the dust and debris. A
woman stenographer comes down in
the morning and streightens out the
popers, and girl file-clerk puts away
the letters and documents. By the
time HIS ROYAL HIGHNESS arrives,
the stage is all set; and all he has to
do is to sit in swivel chair and smoke
a cigar and contemplate his own eff
fciency. He doesn't even have to keep
track Of his own appointments, Or an.
swer his own telephone calls, unless
he wants to-"
"Well, that's it,, protested the
Bachelor. "A man hasn't time for all
the little. minor details Of life. He
does the big. important, vital things
and naturally leaves all the insig
nificant things TOTO somebody else.
YES" sighed the Widow laconical
ly, ITO a woman! He accomplishes the
big feat of eating his dinner-and
leaves the dishes for woman to clear
up. He achieves the vital, heroic feat
Of hanging picture on hook-and
leaves the ladder and the nails and
the dust for woman to clear away
He takes his bath, and expects his
clothes to come running to him whcr
he whistles, and his studs to leap his
shirts with harks of Joy. But I've
never yet known case where doing
the "big things" in life relieved q
woman Of the responsibility of all the
tedious little things, have you? I've
never known a successful business Of
professional woman, who didn't have
to plan the meals. and run the house
and answer all the family letters, an6
do all the Christmas shopping and gel
up the laundry and keep the clothes ir
order, exactly as though she had moth
ing else in the world to do!"
"Great Scott" exclaimed the Bach
elor, impatiently f1inging his cigarette
into the fire. That's 'woman's work
isn't it! You don't expect a MAN t.
do all those petty feminine things, d.
your"
mo-" sighed the Widow. 'T'd be {
disappointed woman, if 1 did! That:
why I yearn to be a mani"
There you go again." complained
the Bachelor. do you know it shock:
me and makes me feel creepy all ove
to hear a little five-foot-two creature
in pink tulle and chiffon and viole
sachet say a thing like that!"
"Oh I don't yearn to LOOK Xix,
one" the Widow fastened to reassur'
him. nor to exchange clothes, no
morals, nor habits with one! But
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