davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Alaska daily empire., 1919-10-23
Luke McLuke Says


 The reason a man sets the alarm clock carefully every night is be, cause his wife has to yell at him six times every morning to get him up.
 A man can go to Hades and get back into society again. But the world won't let woman have re- turn ticket.
 Too many men go through life with he belief that toothbrush is some thing used only by dudes.
 The more you see of some men the more you are convinced that a crea- .ure doesn't have to have four legs 70 be a donkey.
 About the only thing man Is snra If about his wife is that he Will md | pound of her hair in the comb when he wants to use it.
 It doesn't matter what size shoes ! girl wears. any other girls shoes are always too large for her.
The Alaska daily empire., 1919-10-23
BITS OF BY PLAY By Luke McLuke Copyright by Cincinnati
 Enquirer

Names Is Names. Pierce Nee lives in Cookville, Tenn.
 Your Laughing Machine. This Luke McLuke, he is no flulle, His wit is surely keen; He puts the file" right into smile And starts your old machine
 Billy, Ft Wayne, Ind.
 Hooray! Prosperous Fancher has added a new porch to his home in Newport, Tennessee.
 Fact. Don't kiss away a sweet girls tear Though you sure feel like trying For, if you do, the little dear Is sure to keep on crying.
 We'll, Well! Pebble Stone lives in Big Stone Gap, West Virginia, .. Something for Nothing. Some get-rich-quick ads may con vince you That something for nothing you q gain; They're merely anS effort to quince you, f .s As you may find out to your pain Though something for nothing yout collar
 Believe me, it is sure bet, That you'll have to put up dollar For each dollars worth that yor get.
The Alaska daily empire., 1919-10-23

The proposed Alaska Industrial Union Constitu- ions preamble accepts the extreme Socialist view point. It is opposed to profits and private owner ship in productive industries. It favors the conten- eion that labor should have all that it produces. stands for industrial revolution.
The Alaska daily empire., 1919-10-23
flaw. HaW!

This man positively identifies you as the man who hroke into his home and stole money and yaluabl from his clothing" said the judge.
 What lar lie is,' said the burg lar How could he identify me when he had his head under the bedclothes all the time I was in his room?"
The Alaska daily empire., 1919-10-23
NEW FILLMORE HOTEL

DETROIT, Oct. 23.-A new $10,- 100000 hotel, to be known as the Detroit Biltmore, will be erected in Detroit by John M. Bowman, head of the Pershing Square group of ho- tels in New York City.
The Alaska daily empire., 1919-10-23

Let's stay in Juneau this winter and have good ime--and money to help make Juneau grow md ourselves prosperous.
The Alaska daily empire., 1919-10-23

Governor Harding, of the Federal Reserve Board points out that work is the for high prices; but who is he going to get to work?
The Alaska daily empire., 1919-10-23
Oh, Joy!
Though winter hears,
 Do not get sore; The little dears
 Won't wear much more.
Ouch!

 The young woman who had just married the wealthy old man stood in the hall of her home. The wealthy old man had been very ill. His con dition had been critical. "Tell me- said the young woman to the doctor who had just left the bedroom of the patient. Tell me the worst! I will be brave! I will try to bear it.
 "Then nerve yourself for terri ble shock" said the cynical doctor He is going to recover"
 Advice. Some girls would add much to thei,
 graces.
 They wouldn't hear so many jeers: If they'd quit using rouge on theii faces
 And start using soap on their ears
 l'Eenvoy. The series is over. and every fan Wants to Kid Gleason and Pat
 Moran.
 Our Daily Special. Over-rest hurts you more than over work.
The Alaska daily empire., 1919-10-23

You get real meal satisfaction at the Alaska Grill. adv.
The Alaska daily empire., 1919-10-23

Lenine and Trotsky said to be looking for a jai- Indianapolis Star)
The Alaska daily empire., 1919-10-23

Colonel Bullitt may have decided to coaborate with Gutzon Borgium a study entitled "SiIent Aferthoughts "-( Washington Star)
The Alaska daily empire., 1919-10-23

IL has just about gotten in this country that | onhd man can tell when he reaches big town by the talcum powder
The Alaska daily empire., 1919-10-23
~~~ DR. ANNA !. DROWN ~s~

from all parts the world will meet New York active campaign L. Dr. Eleanor Bertne "f the and believe that will offset the the downward path.
The Alaska daily empire., 1919-10-23

Probably the only advantage in being stout 'ady Is that she can begin her massage just any where - '> N-'
The Alaska daily empire., 1919-10-23

Bulbs-Leave orders with Juneau Florists. adv.
The Alaska daily empire., 1919-10-23

Our observation is that the cost of living is al. ways objectionable to those who imagine their social tatus is superior to homemade homny
The Alaska daily empire., 1919-10-23

Also the cost of living good deal lower in ne good old times when the spendthrift swain could delight his sweetheart with dimes worth of candy
The Alaska daily empire., 1919-10-23

And judging by his actions, the circus clown is bout the only individual who isn't huffy over his working conditions.
The Alaska daily empire., 1919-10-23
TIPS FROM TEXAS I
(Dallas News)

(Dallas News) Another difference between a fiye-cent and a ten-cent cigar is a nickel
The Alaska daily empire., 1919-10-23
Our Daily Special.

Over-rest hurts you moro than OVeF- work.
The Alaska daily empire., 1919-10-23

Miss Albrecht
 OSTEOPATH Swedish Massage, Medical Gym nastics. Expert treatment given in all cases requiring massage, diet and mechanical therapeutics. Room 410 GoIdsteIn Bldg. Office. Phone 117-Res. Phone 123
The daily Gate City and constitution-Democrat. (Keokuk, Iowa) 1916-1922, 1919-01-17
LEE COUNTY
AND WAR FUND
1t Exceeds Its Apportionment Of the
December Drive For War
Work, as Does District
and State.

Lee county raised about one-fourth
more than her allotment for the
united war work drive last Deem
Der, collecting 81 1915 FOR the
united war work on an allotment OF
SIS, 200.
The wlole first congressional dis.
trict exceeded its quota IN similar
way. the final figures just given out
show. and the result by counties is
as follows:
Lee e county Quota, s5s,200;
amount reported. s71.4sT7s.
Des Moiues county-Quota, $685.
100; amount reported, sT0.444
Jefferson county-Quota. s29, 900;
amount reported. 10000
Henry county Quota, $4,000;
amount reported. s42.IsO
Washington county-Quota, s46,-
100; amount reported, $50, sos.
Louisa eounty-Quoia, s27 900;
amount repoJed. s31, T22.s5-
There were Just three counties in
the state that had not raised their
quota up 10 December Is. these be
Ing Decatur, Wayne and Guthrie.
According 70 z complete data siree t
up 70 the middle Of December. re-
ceived yesterday. Iowa raised $780,
50z.57 in the recent drive, or 40 per
CENT Of the quota rs announced at
something in excess Of 100000.
The daily Gate City and constitution-Democrat. (Keokuk, Iowa) 1916-1922, 1919-01-17

was disclosed when the state tax
cyommission received returns from
Adair, Pemiscot. Montgomery and
Morgan counties showing that the
assessed valuation in these four coun-
ties had been increased to s75,6S8, 1913
from the last figures of s24.679,216.
Last year, all the counties in Mis-
souri, assessed on basis of a hun
dred percent, but a majority of the
state boards OF equalization rejected
the figures. This creates an inter
esting situation
The daily Gate City and constitution-Democrat. (Keokuk, Iowa) 1916-1922, 1919-01-17
RED CROSS
AUXILLARIES
They Are Doing Good Work and
Have Done Very Much For
the Comfort OF the
Soldiers.


The rural auxiliaries of the Red
Cross have been faithful in their
WORK all during the time that the
Red Cross chapter has been receiv-
ing quotas. They are now helping
on the pajama quota of the sewing
department, and on other work
The Argyle auxiliary is at work on
six suits of pajamas and sixty hand
keTchiefs. Donnellson branch is at
work on forty-eight suits of pajamas.
Sanudsky auxiliary is at work on
thirteen suits OF pajamas and fifty
handkerchiefs. Montrose auxiliary
has completed twenty-four suits Of
pajamas and has two suits in process
OF making SummitviIle is at work
on ten quits of patamas. Summitville
has completed and sent in six suits
Of pajamas and one pair of trousers.
They still have four suits in the
naking.
Primrose has completed eleven
suits OF pajamas. Charleston is at
work on six suits and Melrose is
maken seven suits and hemming
The daily Gate City and constitution-Democrat. (Keokuk, Iowa) 1916-1922, 1919-01-17
OERTEL'S VOTE
WAS AGAINST
Lee County Representative Opposed
Ratification OF Prohibitory
Amendment by
Iowa.

Representative Frank Oertel from
Lee county. voted against the prohi-
bitory amendment in the Iowa house
" Wednesday, being one of the thirteen
who opposed ratification.
Telegraph reports Of the vote sent,
The Gate City Wednesday afternoon,
did not include Oertel's name among
those who voted against the measure
and IL was therefore taken by readers
OF the item that his vote had been
cast with the affirmative side. This
wac not go. a-s he voted nay"
The daily Gate City and constitution-Democrat. (Keokuk, Iowa) 1916-1922, 1919-01-17
BLOODY AK ON
RIVER BRIDGE
Big spiotch Of Blood Found Beside It
This Morning by Waiter Cliff
ford Who Lives Near
iowa End.
GOOD WORK BY POLICE
Solve Whole Mystery in Few Hours
and Reconstruct Deed In Dark
by Scientific Meth
DDS.

| A bloody ak lying near a big splotch
of blood on the floor of the Des
Moines river bridge was discovered
by Walter Clifford this morning.
! He at once notified the police de-
lpartment and Assistant Chief Pearson
! hurried down there. Clifford lives
near the Iowa end Of the bridge
He found plenty Of blood on the
bridge floor, dried into the boards,
an ak with the blade covered with
blood, but no signs of struggle
which however would not be apparent
) on the plank and steel bridge.
Pearson acted quickly and soon had
| the evidence of people living near
there that they had heard commo-
, ton on the bridge about midnight with
at least two men involved, but had
paid little attention to it, as it was
not very uncommon occurance there
since one of the travelled routes to
Warsaw leads over that bridges
Science and Detective Work Win.
Then Pearson made careful search
of the vicinity and found half of
kidney in niche on the bridge floor
where it would be hard to see at night
but was visible in daylight. The kid
hey uou UecA Cut SllioOthiy IL lwo.
Continuing his exciting investiga-
tons, Pearson finally got the half kid
ney identified by comparative
pathology, and began to arrange for
an analysis of the blood which he re-
moved from the kidney and scraped
from the bridge
These showed enough facts to re-
construct the midnight crime. Some
body stole a hog in Missouri. stopped
ion the bridge TO cut it open and throw
the offal into the river to prevent 1t
leading to detection in a keokuk
lalley or back yard, dropping a kidney
in the work.
The daily Gate City and constitution-Democrat. (Keokuk, Iowa) 1916-1922, 1919-01-17
HERE'S QUICK RELIEF FOR
YOUR TIRED, STRAINED MUSCLES

When your muscles become tired and
wollen and the joints become stiff,
our circulation poor, and your suffer-
lg makes you irritable, an application
{ Sloan's Lininent gives you quick
slief-kills pain, starts up q good
irculation, relieves congestion. II IS
asier and cleaner to use than nussy
iasters or ointments, acts quickly and
soes not clog the pores. 1t does not
ain the skin.
The daily Gate City and constitution-Democrat. (Keokuk, Iowa) 1916-1922, 1919-01-17

For s-s;nE, st-zias. b-uises, --DlzcE
and olUe epOs, Scans Lizi1eat re-
ouces the pain and eases tie Soreness.
Certainly hae for rHeu-zsti--l, sti7
neck, scis-a1z, lane back, tootEache.
You doa trsed torub-z4 peaee-ztes.
Its use IS 80 raiserzl that yo1TL
consider slozu's Lia;-eur friend Of
the whole family. Generous size bue-les
at druggists ev=ygoe-e-
The daily Gate City and constitution-Democrat. (Keokuk, Iowa) 1916-1922, 1919-01-17
aOH, II | COULD
BREAK THIS COLD!"
Almost as soon as said with
DIX. Kings NewDiscovery
Get q bottle today!

The rzp:Jity with which Tia sfty.
yes--5ld family remedy relieves coughs,
coias sad nald bronchial attacks Ia
what has kept its popularity On the
Increase yer by year.
This standard reliever Of coda and
copgazpg soelis never loses friends. It
oos qascsdy sad pleasantly wfzst It 10
recommended % ID. One trial p1ts It
s. your MEDICINE cabine< as absoiu,ciY
indispensable. 5oc and $f.Z0.
The daily Gate City and constitution-Democrat. (Keokuk, Iowa) 1916-1922, 1919-01-17
sixty-five handkerchiefs.

Mrs. Chenowith reported at the
Red Cross meeting yesterday that
Argyle had made one hundred COM
fort kits; DonnelIson branch. one
hundred comfort kits and twenty-five
childrens petticoats; Sandusky made
twenty-five comfort kits; Montroas
made thirty petticoats for children,
and Summitville twenty. Primrose
made forty comfort kits and New
Boston made ten. Melrose and Gro
ton each made fifty comfort kits.
The daily Gate City and constitution-Democrat. (Keokuk, Iowa) 1916-1922, 1919-01-17
Chinese Help Grandma
Wise orientais Provide Aid For Goose
Grease and Tdrpentine as
Eoid RAn1Adv


Cold Remedy.
1t cannot be denied that the Chi
nese sometimes show their brothers
of the West some valuable ideas.
They did this when they added
Menthol, wintergreen and other
soothing. healing oils to the goose
grease and turpenine with which our
grandmothers anointed the chests OF
their patients.
The Chinese Grandmas showed the
sufferers of the Orient how to inhaie
the balmy fumes of the Menthol and
other plant extracts. This soothed
the Inflammation from the inside
the western remedy worked from the
outside.
Goose-grease and turpentine are
as effective now as ever But when
combined with the Chinese remedies
they produce results much quicker.
Men-Tho-Eze is the combination OK
all these-and gives relief In twenty
minutes.
Get 30-cent jar today and keep
IL handy. For sale by most drae
BlbtAs
The daily Gate City and constitution-Democrat. (Keokuk, Iowa) 1916-1922, 1919-01-17

ELECTRIC SIGNS, darkened and drafted
L from commercial service for the period
of the war; are the first to be mustered out and
returned to industry with the coming of peace
The daily Gate City and constitution-Democrat. (Keokuk, Iowa) 1916-1922, 1919-01-17
CLARK COUNTY
ASSESSMENTS
VIII They &c Increased This Year to
&c Three Times What They
Were Last Year, is the
Question.

Clark county. Missouri. people are
much Interested just now In the de-
termination Of al the county asses
so-s Ia that state 70 assess all prop
e-+y q its fun cash value.
The first news Of this new plan
The daily Gate City and constitution-Democrat. (Keokuk, Iowa) 1916-1922, 1919-01-17

What's become OF the careful
residents who used to wrap their
necks with wooden scarfs In winter
timer" asks Anxious Inquirer" Quit
kidding and consult a glossary OF
cemetery epitaphs.
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1919-06-01
FROM OTHER VIEWPOINTS
National Problems
SOLVING THE BALKAN PROBLEM
Ian Army

TT.cSnrd everything connected With tho
h tnaiRans as kind of Chinese puzzle,
age man That peninsula ie considered
a wrter OF opposing races. so intrl-
s srs ir, mixed up that all frontier lines
are Impossible AS consequence the
, ,eemdency is to abandon study OF the
Ih ikn r, as insolubie It may sound
10 balkan problem. Tho problem in
ne past was purely artificial one.
sometimes = group. OF the great powers
VII" used their unfortunate protege as
n cats paw to advance it's interests.
the European chessboard. which had
from time to time TO he sacrificed to
cover the moves Of the more important
II left TO themselves Serbs. Bulsars
Montcnegrans, Greeks and Roumanians
'tor,, though Roumania is not strictly
such interest I'm the conflicts Of the Bal
KAN states as to give her at least
hbgSne, rank among them would soon
The sword or by negotiation. But each
time something like n definite settle-
ment doomed on tho horizon. one or
on IL.
The world war has taught one lesson
at least that Is the necessity OF putting
An end. once and for all. TO This state OF
things The allied powers have for the
first time, consented 20 allow the Bal
kan states TO work out their own sal
walton. TO allow the separate elements
OF the various races 20 fuse together
INTO separate states and reach dcn-
niic scttlcmcnt among Themselves
This has led 10 the creation OF one
new state. the kingdom of the serbs.
troa's and Slovcucs Cnore popula rly
Known AS JuEoslavia). and the extern
son Of TWO others by creating Greater
Roumania and Greater Greece
Jugoslavia or Southern Slavia
rJus" is the Serbian word for Sou,hJ.
Is composed Of Serbia. the Serho-Croa
tian provinces formerly held BY Aus.
fria. and Montenegro. The Serho-
Croatian provinces OF Austria consist
"a OF Bosnia. Herzegovina. Croatia.
S!avonia. ls;r!a. Sori;zta. Dalmatia and
pari o, the Banat OF Temesvar. In the
struggle OF these countries for their
Independence Serbia has played the
role OF the Balkan Piedmont. with The
result that the other provinces have
sroupcd themselves around her and
proclaimed King Peter sovereign az
hc now dominions As CONSEQUENCE
IN" number OF his subjects has grown
from four and half TO $4,000. 900
Greater Roumania has been formed
hc tho acquisition OF Transylvania. the
Bukov.na and part or the Banat OF
Tomesvar from Austria. and OF mo
part Of Russian Hessarabia Inhabited
by Eoumanians King Ferdinand now
rules over about 10000 900 subjects.
instead OF seven and a half, as former
~.
Greater Greece 4. formed nv She
addition 20 the former Kingdom OF
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1919-06-01
Books and Authors

George II. Doran Company announce
Tor early juno publication n list Of NC
ton which has many sided appeal
For those who deleh. in mystery. in
trigue and exciting love stories thcr.
are One OF Three by Clifford Raw
mond., and Tn Secret" by Robert W.
Chambers. \ serious note is touched
in Charles NJ Shcldon's novel of re-
construction. "All the world Dan
serous Days" by Mary Roberts Rin4
mart, is herslded by those who have
read It In serial form as her best novel
Last. but not least. comes Irwin s
COBB with humorous skit called 9TH.
Life OF the Farty."
Mind and Conduct" BY Henry nu,-
gers Marshall. l." IT, D., u. S.. autho,.
OF Pain, Pleasure and Aesthetics
Instinct and Reason" and "C,ouscio,,.-
ness was published by the 8cribners
on May %. The contents are prouncI
under the three sections: THE Corr.
iation of Mind and Conduc,". som.
implications OF the Correlation AMI
Guides to Conduct" DR. Marshall was
invited to deliver the lectures mas
the Morse Foundation at Union Thee
logical Seminary in New York thie
spring and this volume is an enlorac
ment of views alrcsdy rubli.hed: :,
number Of the points brought out havn
not thus far appeared In print.
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1919-06-01
Why Not Pass II Back?

II bPUBLlCAN statesmen in the new House
ana senate keenly resent the Presidents
action III passing the prohibition buck" 10
them. They are hopping mad about it, They
insist that his recommendation was merely
an adroit political maneuver designed to en-
harrass them. and that such tactics are nm
worthy OF a great political figure like the
President.
me embarrassment is being felt or this
thcre can be no question. The Republicans
arc III control OF the parliamentary ma
chinery Of both branches of Congress. No
Dill can come TO the floor for vote without
the approval of Republican committee. No
measure can pass without Republican votes
IN large numbers, and no proposition can be
suppressed unless the Republicans consent
10 IT. II the prohibition repeal measure
comes forth, therefore, it will come by grace
oil Republican favor. which will give offense
10 the drys. II ii is choked TO death in com
ml'tee 1t VIII be choked under Republican
auspices and give offense TO the vets
lhere seems TO be one other course which
the Republican majority can pursue They
can brlns out measure which will place in
inc hands of the President the power to sus-
pend tho wartime prohibition bill This
would pass the buck back TO the White
House. The President minated very clearly
in his message that If the law had authorized
MIN to deal with this question: he would have
issued such an order. If the Republicans
think he is bluffng about it, they can cffcc.
lively call that bluff by passing a Joint rcso-
luton empowering the President to RESPITE
the wine and beer interests until the consti-
tutional amendment becomes effective
Nor could the President object to such leg
islation In fact. he has seemed to invite il
lie did not tell Congress what sort of
measure II should pass, but he told 1t that. IN
his Judgment, no restrictive legislation will
be necessary after July !, in so far as wines
and beer arc concerned. lie was speaking
OF course, with reference to the food and
fuel conservation, to bring about which the
original legislation Qstensibly was passed II
III is ms judgment that the law should be
repeated congress can very properly au-
thorize him TO follow that judgment and TO
assume such resi- possibility as NAV he in
volvcd
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1919-06-01
A Magical Strain
Rf y. =. DADCOCK.

-Four little notcs-b hat d. T. and II nat--
heard in an ascending sequence! We Americans
Their effect. where nultitudes assembled
out of doors is like that Of vaat scythc sweep
ing over the throng. and barring it Of every ha, .
within doors they assume the function Of some
mighty lever. suddenly uprootng all hearers
from their seats.
doubtless there are scores. perhaps hundreds
OF musical compositions beginning with an
idcntical combination Of notes, but today in any
part OF the United states one need az we'll
douht tho power of spark ignite powder
AS TO doubt tina; blaze OF patriotic emotion Is
THE star panEled Banner over and over
again during the past year have witnessed.
almost with awe, the magical effect Of that
opening strain.
Wonhrous spectacle is this! Thousands of
men npon the streets suddenly halted by mere
strain of music as though on the briul, of a
pit; bootbacks knecIinr with cans ,hrnwn On
the pavement. before barcheaded customers;
P"liccmen and every man wh" wears uniform
SStandinG like a statue. with hand raised to his
forehead; young women on their way TO store
or office. rendered motioulcss and silent: news
boys ceasinS to shout their wares. in open
doorways held by this agic spell either from
crowded square a sea OF hatIess heads
Less impressive hut equally illustrative Of
our national anthem. is the spontaneous action
they occasion in all thcatcrs halls or other
places OF asscmblaGc; never a man or woman
too lame feeble o arise in instant rcsnousc
to their command
Why is il that Tho frs, suggestion of the
mcioaN. sometimes indeed at merely the initial
note. The Star. Spangicd Banner receives
Is i, not because the war has ingraftcd mron
our inner consciousness realization. never
before so constant or so acute OF all tina, the
Mas stands for. Have not been il may
use tn" expression. surcharEed with the spiri,
OF patriotic enthusiasm which only needs
crcr in our subconsciousncss seeking such
escape.