Albuquerque morning journal. [volume] (Albuquerque, N.M.) 1903-1926, 1919-03-25
Copyright, 1919. by Press Publishing
III You Can Not Be Domestic, Be as
Domestic As You Can.

There seems to be a widespread
opinion that epigrams are made to be
stolen. However, 1 shall leave to
someone less hampered by a New
England conscience than / am the un-
holy joy of appropriating the single
sentence which ispired this series of
articles and credit it to the January
Smart Set where, at least, so far as
know, it began its career.
Every man has two wives" this
witty paragI aph asserts; 1.-THE woman
he married and the woman he thinks
he married"
1t is my personal opinion that at
least one other wife was left out of
this aphorism - the woman SHE
thinks he married But. of course
something has to be sacrificed in
every epigram. and after all what is
one wife more or less?
Anyway, considering the two ladies
with whom we started, 1t happens fire.
quently that the actual woman q man
marries is a far nicer person than the
woman he thinks he marries. TT
takes coarse personality to get over
footlights," Abraham Erlanger re-
marked years ago IN an interview
which l have remembered ever since
because of its rare good sense. And
so many men have footlights around
their hearts that women who seek
to interest them have to dramatize-
really to burlesque themselves.
All my life | have been puzzled by
the fact that an idea expressed to me
personally by one of my women
friends mi sht meet with my entire
approval, yet the same idea quoted
to me from the same woman by an
admiring male would fill me with
scorn for his simplicity. Poor dupe"
would think inwardly, $50 that is
the pose she takes with him.
For a long time / was unable to
determine whether this psychological
discrepancy was due to the fact that
a woman's thought might suffer in
transmission through the coarser me-
dunn of mans mind, whether my
friend was a frightful hypocrite or
just a plain pussy cat who disliked to
hear another woman quoted with APP
prevail. And then one day the solut
ton came. with women she IS her.
self!' I reflected, with men she ACTS
herself--or rather the version of her.
self she knows they prefer.
The most successful wives--I don't
say successful when l mean ideal
am convinced are those who discover
early in marriage the woman the hus-
band wants them to be, and play that
part forever after. AS rule, the role
is not an exacting one. A few sour
cynics among the sex that likes its
wives, its collars and it's derby hats
to be exactly alike may. prefer in
tellectual brilliancy 20 more conven-
Al .fo1
negligible in number, and every single
one of them is more pleased to see
the blue stocking he has domestic-
ated engaged in darning his socks and
sewing buttons on his winter under
wear than IL she wrote one hundred
sonnets in his honor.
After all. it is whole lot easier
to sew on buttons than to write son
nets, Also 1t pays better. Have all
the brilliant women since time began
received financial rewards comparable
| to those which belong to the generally
| ton contract for men like Rockefeller
Carnegie Schwab or any other Croes.
us who happens to come !nto your
| mind?- &t N4& NJ 20 p,
| The husband of one of the most
AWOHitH nave CNtl Setili
who is as Intelligent. charming and
witty as she is lovely. when he wants
| to brag about his wife, mentions the
marvellous sphagetti she can make
Another husband. who has lived SO
long with a brilliant woman that
E! epigrams are no more to him thar
yesterdays newspaper, was touched
almost to tears because she crocheted
a necktie for him Christmas.
The simple, every DAY, despised do
nestle virtues are the common herit-
age of the woman every man thinks
he married. The ideal wife. of course
| is a cross between Cleopatra and lit
tie brown hen. and whether he domes-
| ticates the siren. or the fowl he will!
spend the rest of his life trying to
make the little hen look like Bird
OF Paradise or teaching Cleopatra to
cluck, ssa7e NJ MA,
Now. Il is far easter to cluck than
to be brilliant or beautiful. And
y al = . 7 (. f,l :