The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-03-28
MEN, WOMEN
 AND THINGS

There is one thing sure, no Rotarian
 can truthfully say that the programmes
 at the Wednesday luncheons are all on
 the dead level of monotony. for they
 are very much like the old saying
 about petit juries, that the Lord him
 self does not know what they are going to do
 II I suppose this has much to do with the great attendance record which Birming gham rolls up. much to the joy
 of headquarters. but to the chagrin of
 some of the other cities seeking to gs.
 ahead of the chapter here in this pace
 setting town of ours.
 1 I referred to the petit juries as all
 unknown quantity and of the imputed ignorance of the Lord himself as to what verdict they will render. Now,
 while Morris Bush isn't Lord, yet no 1 Is known to all as a prince of good
 fellows, and some wise guy, but few meetings back, he said he was in the dark as to what the wives of the Ro-
 tarians were going to hand him. 1
 | I have never been a very forward Rotarian and up to date there is no 1 score against me for taking up any
 time in talk or suggesting ways and means to add to the pleasure of the l lunoheons, but I am going to be bit pushful and at least state that think it would be a fine thing for the bache- | ta or at least every quarter. (The bache- iors not being called upon to foot the bill. but each man buying his own wife's meal ticket) --~
 The above infringes upon some Ro- tary rule, sbut what care I, for it's my pleasure to be a free lance and 'butt" in where older Rotarians may be afraid to tread. I do not know that will go far enough to bring 1t for mally before the body, but just throw the idea out in order that the members | may null over it for awhile and if.I 1t seems good to the programme com- mittee., let them father it. q amere- ferring to the married men on the committed; the bachelors will be ez- cused from the fathering act)
  I thought the invasion of the wives was a mighty fine thing. It impressed me greatly at the time, but the more I recall the fun and fro1ic the more my appetite calls for a return engagement. The only thing regret is that Dolly Dalrymple was not present to have written it Up in her own inimitable way and let the outside world see just how clever the women put one over on the men. For boise and ability to handle any situation I will set up my gifted and ] versatile presiding officer and master 1 of repartee against any president ot any Rotary club in America, but | think he will admit himself that it is l much easier to handle men than 1t Is 1 women. even if 1t be far less pleasant. l When they stole the flowers from un- 1 der his very nose he simply smiled and | waved gallantly to the speakers table I opposite where sat Mrs. Connors. sur- l rounded by some lovely matrons.
 
 I saw, however cloud pass over ms l face as one of the charming but saucy l young brides lifted his gavel and started away with 1t. He couldn't l publicity grab her He was too much | of a Chesterfield to speak roughly | to her. but he was parliamentarian l enough to know that a presiding off, | fioer without the symbol of authority | in bis hand was powerless to dominate | meeting. Diplomatist that he is. he | called on the sergeant -at-arms to re- l store it to him, but he made no movo | to invade the enemies territory.
 Morris. with his wonted diplomacy, l tried to win over the rebellious wives 1 with bonmots la Bush, but Mrs Con- 1 nors. who had assumed charge of the | gathering, was far too wise to take the | bait, but with a courtesy equal to. that | of the prince, waived him aside and 1 put the ball in play in such an expert way as to let her sisters know that she meant to see to>it that they kicked 1 goal if every man in the house had to be bowled over.
 Tactful Morris. not yet subdued pleaded that a special programme had been arranged and tha it ought to be carried out. but that if the men were going to meekly submit to their wives he supposed that as bachelor it would be best for him to fall in line with the crowd. Itwas good safety-first play. and as the chinamen say, he saved his face and was content to sit on the side lines. instead of directing the performance
 Believe me, things began to happen lively when the wives got going. There were speeches, motions and hap- penings galore. A three-ringed cir GUS wasn't in it with the rapidity with which they moved A dozen bachelors had been ordered to the bar and it was pitiful to see the expression on some of their faces as they faced the charge of having failed in their duty to their sex. They were let off with q light fine. It fell to their lot to pay for the lunch for the ladies.
 NOW. I want to say this much for Morris Rucb 1