davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1919-04-12
FAIRFIELD

Fridays session Of the Maine confer
ence vas opened az SD o'clock. the
usual hour, bY the devotional service ;
led by Bishop ?. y. Bristol, who gave
a very strong address. stating that
mans need at the presea, time .s not
tire wings OF dove 5u, great filth.
Ats O'Clock the conference went into
executive session. Il was reported that
Rev. W F. Lord was at the New York
East Conference.
A, his own suggestion Dr. ". F. Be--
rs was placed in the supe-aUnar- re-
la,ion. as was Rev. II. A Clifford. Rev.
c. Rogers was transferred from th-
supernumery relation 20 the retired re-
lation.
Re- H. G. Mccain IL to continue
in the studies of the fourth year. Rev.
W ". Latte and Rev. John s. Cross
land were advanced to the studies OF
the fourth year. Rev. c. c. Chayer VII
continue in the studies OF the fourth
year
A. J. Belts OF Tire Methodist Booi. Co
was granted few moments in which
he spoke IN ne interest Of the publish
ing COMPANY. He presenter them with
daft OF s1:9 which was receive
with thanks by the conference and was
tr--ed over TO the conference treasurer
TIE time was eyuended and Tr Rock
we'll rlanc- was introduced and gave =
short address on his. work in India
Or. ". r Perry smoke 81 .ha new law
WITH res-ect TO alcohol I'D tee- a,1
commenced The governor for the stand
he has taten.
J. ~. Art@rs moved. anh Il carried
'ha. the secretary send letter Of ap-
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1919-04-12
being sen. by the insurance bureau 70

being sent by the insurance bureau 70
al army and navy stations 10 have the
nen apply for Transmission % the ce--
;ifcates to themselves or .heir bene-
fic.aries-
New York. April li.-Guy e Tr:2p.
chairman ot the bard Q. directors OF
the WESTINGHOUSE Electric ard Manu-
featuring Company, announced today
that an agreement. had been reachei
with certain British interests under
which the Westinghouse company sold
It's British holdings 1o- cash ard en-
tered q commercial! alliance locking to
the development o; export business
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1919-04-12

Washington. April iI.-Acting Score
tsry Roosevelt has directed .he Amer
lean Naval attaches ~ London AMI
Madrid 20 express TO the Grand Span
ish Adrni-al:ies the Nay DEPARTMENTS
appreciation for the rescue Of officers
and r.en OF the DESTROYER L-ansdale 81
the crews o. the British warship Lich
eos and the Spanish warship Princess
&c Asturias at Tangier. Morocco. De-
cerlber $ TIE Americans we've throw
overheard b. tire ca1sizing OF a small
boat from the destroyer
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1919-04-12
New York Money Market

Monday. April y. has been finally set
tied upon as the date for the opening
OF the Eastern Steamship Lines between
Boston and Bangor. This informa ton
was received Wednesday by supt. sher-
man from President Calvin Austin.
supt. Sherman has been at Camden
during part Of this week overse cling
the work upon the steamers ]. T. Norss
ana Catherine. which are being put in
snops there for the coming season. As
mas been stated. President Austin had
originally intended to start the Boston
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1919-04-12
DANCER Turks IN
ONE OF US.
We Are a. Full Of Deadly Peisons
as a Germ Laboratory
AuTO-INTQxICAT|ON
OR SELF-P0|s0NING
-FRUiT-A-TivEs" Absolutely Pre-
vents This Dangerous cendi.ien

TIE chief cause Of poor health IS
our neglect &C TIE bowels. Waste
matter, instead Ct passing from the
lower in;est:aes regularly every day,
is allowed 70 remain there. general
Ing poisons which are absorbed By
the blood
In other words. q ps-son who is
habi.usily co-s-.pa1ed. Is poisoning
hinss.t We know .ow tia: AUTO
intoxicati6n. due 20 non-acr.on Ct the
bowels. Is directly responsible for
serious Kidney ard Bladder T-or-
bles; thai !. rczets TIE Stomach.
causes Indigestion. Loss Of Appetite
and SIeep.essness; that chronic
Rhe Gnstisrn- Govt. Pain II The
Back. are relieved as soo-. as the
bowels become regular; ard that
Pimples. Fashss, Eczema and other
Skin Affections disappear when
--Fruit-a- tiyes" are taken to correct
Constipation.
Fruit -tives" Tor Fruit Liver
Tablets, will protect you against
Auto into1ication.
.ec. box. for $3.50. tria, size
25c. At all dealers or sen, On re-
ce!pt Of price, by FRCIT-A-TIVE;
Limited, OGDESSBCRG, y. y
Adv.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1919-04-12
Rolsheyiki At Nicaraqua

San Sa.vafo-. ThursGay, April T
The Nicaragua. government has 70
ceive1 Information that Bols::evi;
4 gents are arriving in t1st countr!t f.
the purpose Of secretly reaching p-iE-
cioal cities in Central America. Az
tho-.,ies a, ports ard along the tron-
tiers have received orders 10 ha ezp=-
c.ai.y v!g:laat II. OBTAINING ue. SUSPECT
ed ot icing Bolshey.ai
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1919-04-12

Seul, F1oav. April 4.-fBy the -Asso
cia:ed Press mime persons are repor..
ed 10 have been killed ard many other
injured in Disorders a. Songdo. Chang
.hon. Songyarg. VIII ard HonThyon
in the province II Ping Yang, accor1'
ing 20 government adyices- Seul Is
cuiet.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1919-04-12

Washington, April u--As e .e-na-
nent organization II promote establish
.nen. motor truck trunk transportation
lines in rural districts ard FOR short
han! service generally. the highways
,1aspor. committee cf the counc!! o.
national defense has been reo-ganizei
70 include representatives Of several
government departments interested Y
improved highway trsnzror.a;ioa.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1919-04-12
AUGUSTALOCALS
"Y" GIRLS Shine
Score Success in An
nual Exhibition
Wonderful Skill and Training Shown
in Succession Of Drills, Dances and
Games-Governor Miiiiken Pins
Honor Badges on contestants-
Ceny Girls Trim Aiumnae at Bas.
ketbali

Miss Doris Wilder starred a WON
derful success with the annual ""
Girls gymnasium exhibition at the Y.
N. c. A. building last evening. From
start to finish the 400 spectators who
entirely filled the seating capacity Of
the gymnasium were entertained with
program Of drills. dances. games.
eac.. which showed in a marked de-
gree wonderful skill and training
Never in the history of the Associa-
ton has the Girls gymnasium classes
staged such a fun evenings enter
tainment where each number showed
variety and charm throughout.
The evenings program was opened
with Swedish floor work by the Jun
Tors. which pictured to the audience
. typical setting up drill. and this
was followed by a dumb bell drill by
the Seniors. Miss Mae Richmond
then gave a fine exhibition Of club
swinging. The next number was
Folk Dances Of Nations by the Jun
Tors. the first being the dance OF
Greeting" (Danish). and the second
was 'Carrouser' (Swedish). The
Seniors then went through . series OF
athletic free arm exercises, and the
Juniors gave a wand drill. And the
closing number OF the first part was
. solo dance which was very grace
fully executed by Miss Dorothy Gray
and was warmly appluaded.
The Seniors then gave two folk
dances: Mountain March (Norweg.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1919-04-12

Score: Cory Girls Il; Cony Alum
nae u. Goals from floor. L. Folsom
4, "A Steri.rg .. G. Best 3. Goals from
fouls. L. Folsom 4; H. Thompson 2;
G. Best . Referee. Miss Clafke; UNI
pire. Mira II. Sterling; scorer. Miss
Bertha Morrill,; timer, Miss Marga-
ret White and DR.. Anderson. Time.
four s-minute periods. Attendance,
40
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1919-04-12
CHELSEA

Rev. T. j. Coolhro;h. pastor of the
Adventist church at Waterviile. will
hold a meeting Sunday aftrnoon and
evening at the Kings schoolhouse,
Chelsea. All are invited.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1919-04-12
GERMAN GRAVE
DIGGERS STRIKE

Berlin, April 1.-The grave d!ggers
in some parts % Germany have gone
on q strike. consequently the ladies
Of many dead remain urburied.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1919-04-12
TWO CANADIAN
EDITORS COMMANDED
IMPORTANT DIVISIONS

hcnccn. April n-viA Xontreal-
Field Marshal HAig. IN his dnal dis
patch as commal6er-in-chief Of the
BE,Sa forces in France, cites a
number Of instances OF men who
from civil or comparatively humble
occupations rose during the war TO
important commands Promotion was
entirely by sueri,. be says-
Tie field marshal cited a school
master. a lawyer a taxicab driver
and a sergeant major who command
"a tr;gades and an editor who con-
macGet q division.
Two editors. both Canadians, ros.
20 important commands in the i'm
pe-ial army IN France They were
Major General Sir David Watson.
Quebec, ccmEanoing the 4,h Ca
madam division and Major Genera!
E ". Morrison. Ottawa, command
ing TIE Canadian artillery Both
started the var as colonels in tie
Canadian militia.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1919-04-12
AUGUSTA PEOPLE MUST MAKE
SuPREMEEFFO TODAY TO GO
OVER TOP IN Y. NJ. c. A. DRIVE

ta's quota is $500 and this will be
subscribed today in full II every
worker and giyer does his full share.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1919-04-12

Fred ?. Lard, Blaine Owen. Forrest 9.
T?soa, NJ D. solver ". Turner. u. D,
P 9. Weller, P Il. Whiting.
.k4c:s! Students.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1919-04-12
TOO TIRED
TO WORK?

II you get up in the morning .', ani
if you weary with little exertien 1, s
if vim and 60 are lacking. aet an,
upon it that your liver is torpi11, iii sil
dose of Schenck 8 Mandrake tiils y,
wake up" that lazy liver ana Nan Nan.
you feel like new. SchencA aht.
drake Pills are worth a tria! 'on's'
3se pr bse-u.-sassl - sugar e0''''
Dr. J. H. Schenck 4 Son. Philade'p'-
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1919-04-12
Feel Better

lis .t TO fA bee- astes many weks Of deeson 1nga o
ae.< DO appes AID s1.h E;z flights. n mary case. th
,e. fro ~roz eating AID nes q tie cay action Ct tae
ty~es. Yea ca readily pore tbs ~ Gynz the go-ne
1Fn A.r,,ss Ns.aciae. Take ,ezspoonta n gas d
... a. h- bce t.ezk.z s1d smaller azoat after meals,
you a. tss.- Eat oxy Of plz;n food. drink zrnzyd
.ad ooe.e zod tea =: bedtime with little IL.
Axod Msaae. Yea vi lee. bite. m day OF two AID n
lev woa5es.Ey improved Bay today OF yo dz'ef the
true Il. F.. a6e ~ TIE L. F. Nene Co., Porfiznn Die.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1919-04-12

Bangor season on April IA but da'e ~
week later was found to Se more
ticahlA
Palisadian. [volume] (Cliffside Park, N.J.) 1906-current, 1919-11-22
Horse Stealing in Berlin.

Thirty-tive to forty horses are stolen
each dry in Berlin, and very snail
percentage are ever returned to the
owners, despite the creation Of a spe-
ciai police department to combat this
evil. The horses disappear forever be-
cause they are usually Immediately
slaughtered and the meat sold through
Illicit trade channels.
The thieves watch for teams, the
drivers of which have left them for
moment. and drive the horses away.
If the wagons contain anything of val
use, it is stolen and the horses are TAX
en- to secret barns and sheds. or even
to wooded suburban sections, and kill
ed Immediately.
Insurance companies that used to in
sure horses and teams. will do so no
more.
Palisadian. [volume] (Cliffside Park, N.J.) 1906-current, 1919-11-22
Dads Wide Acquaintance.

An Erie man took his nine-year-old
daughter along with him to X. c. the
other day. After arriving at the Union
station they started uptown and, when
about two blocks from the depot, this
Erie man said to his daughter:
Hold my suitcase. dear. there's a
man in here l know"
They walked past three more build
ings and again 1t was, Hold my suit
case, dear. there's a man in here 1
know" And then they walked on to
the corner and dad once more said:
"Hold my suitcase, dear. there's a
man In here l know" When he came
from the building this time the nine
year-old Erie girl looked up in her
fathers face and said:
"Dad, you must know nearly every
body In Kansas Clty."-Erie Record.
Palisadian. [volume] (Cliffside Park, N.J.) 1906-current, 1919-11-22

Nancy OOVCk
children, having the measles. prevent
ed her rushing home. Shortly after
their recovery. came Clifford's brief
confirming note. Nancy had stolen her
sweetheart.
After the death Of her parents the
following year she cut all communica-
ton with her home town, more than
ready to yield to the new life and for
get the old.
Bretna looked back at the wasted
years of toll. unselfish burden.bearing
"a life sacrificed. And for what pur-
pose. To be dumped aside now that
her labors were no longer needed. The
youngest and last of the five children
had married, and William had decided
to make his home with his favorite
daughter. The house. grown so dear
nothing for her but to go back to the
village and witness the happiness that
might have been hers.
And she had loved them so dearly.
Stuart, the oldest, and the twins,
Frank and Lee; Jimmie. her favorite,
and the youngest, and pet, little gold
en-haired May. Oh. she would tear
them all out of her heart, even Will
liam, who had always been SO Kind
and good.
Bretna found the little cottage. her
inheritance, and began in a half-heart-
ed way to clean up and keep house.
She was lonesome, desperately, home
sick and ashamed! Yes, mortified. to
face the old friends and acquaintance
who knew of her love affair." She re-
scented their pity. Every time she
nervously entered the village stores
she heard the whispering. Once she
caught: Eyes, Nancy stole him away"
and poor girl" Then all the more
she enveloped herself in a mantle of
ice and kept everybody miles away with
the coolest of mods.
Most of the day she worked In the
stony vegetable patch and the evening
sat alone and desOlate In the vine-cov-
cred porch, trying not to think of Will
laugh. or hear the old familiar creak
of the garden gate announcing a visit
of one of the married sons.
"Wasted years, wasted years."
croaked the distant frogs, and Bretna's
trembling lips repeated the words even
up In the low-ceilinged bedroom far
lnto the night.
Palisadian. [volume] (Cliffside Park, N.J.) 1906-current, 1919-11-22
Transportation in Palestine.

Crossing the Dead sea proved no
easy task In IA land where commerce
is at standstill, and transportation
facilities are virtually nil. A Red
Cross engineer who recently returned
from Palestine tells how II was done.
ut was necessary TO carry boat
from Jatfa, on the seacoast. to Jerti-
salem In order TO cross the Dead sea
to Jericho to get grain to take back
to Jaffa. This journey of something
more than 100 miles was over an al
most impossible terrain. some OF IL
iowlands, hundreds Of feet below sea
level, and much Of 1t rugged. noun
famous country. The Dead sea itself
Is 1000 feet below sea level.
This Is typical of transport diff
culties all over Palestine"
Palisadian. [volume] (Cliffside Park, N.J.) 1906-current, 1919-11-22
HEADACHE
Often Caused by
ACid-Stolr1acIl

Yes indeed, more often than you think.
Because ACID STOMACH, starting with in
digestion. heartburn. belching. food-repeat-
ing, bloat and gas. IL not checked. will even
tually affect every vital organ OF tho body.
Severe, binding. splitting headaches are.
therefore, OF frequent occurrence a result
of this upset condition.
Take EATONIC. 1t quickly sanishea acid
stomach with it's sour bloat. pain AID gas.
1t aids digestion-helps the stomach get
full strength from every mouthful Of food
you eat. Millions of people miserable.
weak. sick and ailing because of ACID
STOMACH. Poisons. created by partly d.
gested food charged with acid. are absorbed
into the blood and distributed throughout
the entire system. This often causes rheu-
matism, biliousness cirrhosis of the liver.
heart trouble, ulcers and even of
the stomach. 1t robs its victims OF their
health, undermines the strength of the
most vigorous.
II you want to get back your physical
and mental strength-be full of vim and
vigor-enjoy life and be happy. you must
get rid of your acid-stomach.
In EATONIC you will find the very help
you need and it's guaranteed. So get big
SOC box from your druggist today II #
falls to please you, return It and he will
refund
Palisadian. [volume] (Cliffside Park, N.J.) 1906-current, 1919-11-22
Catarrhal Deafness Cannot Be Cured

by local applications as they cannot reach
the diseased portion OF the ear. There Is
only one way to cure Catarrhal Deafness.
and that Is by q constitutional remedy.
HALLS CATARRH MEDICINE acts
through the Blood on the Mucous Surfaces
OF the System. Catarrhal Deafness IL
caused by an infiamed condition of the
mucous lining of the Eustachian Tube
When this tube Is infiamed you have a
rambling sound or imperfect hearing, and
when it is entirely closed, Deafness is the
result. Unless the Inflammation can be re-
NAL condition, hearing may be destroyed
forever. Many cases of Deafness are
caused by Catarrh. which is an inflamed
condition OF the Mucous Surfaces.
ONE HUNDRED DOLLARS for any
case of Catarrhal Deafness that cannot
be cured by HALLS CATARRa
MEDICINE.
All Druggists &c Circulars free.
3. ]. Cheney & Co.. Toledo, Ohio.
Palisadian. [volume] (Cliffside Park, N.J.) 1906-current, 1919-11-22
RASCALS
Bilnusness, Headache. Colds.
Constipation. driven out
with "Cascarets"

Why take nasty cathartics, sickening
salts, or stomach-turning oils to drive
these rascals out? Let gentle, harmless
Cascarets remove the liver and bowel
poison which Is keeping your head
dizzy. your tongue coated. your skin
sallow, your breath offensive, and your
stomach sour. Get box Of Cascarets
at the drug store and rid your liver.
stomach and bowels Of the excess bile,
poisons, and waste which are keeping
you miserable. Cascarets never grippe.
never sicken, never Inconvenience.
They cost so little and work while you
sleep.-Adv.
Palisadian. [volume] (Cliffside Park, N.J.) 1906-current, 1919-11-22
B0SCHEE'S SYRUP.

In these days of unsettled weather
look out for colds. Take every pre-
caution against the dreaded influenza
and at the first sneeze remember that
Boschee's Syrup has been used for
fifty-three years in all parts of the
United States for coughs. bronchitis
and colds, throat irritation and espe-
cially for lung troubles, giving the
patient good nights rest, free from
coughing, with easy expectoration in
the morning. Made in America and
kept as household remedy in the
homes Of thousands of families all
over the civilized world. Try one bottle
and accept no substitutes.-Adv.
Palisadian. [volume] (Cliffside Park, N.J.) 1906-current, 1919-11-22
Wasted Years
By LILY WANDEL
Copyright. 1919, by tho Mcclure News
paper Syndicate.)

Bretna Sterrett sat In the crowded
depot waiting for the train that was to
take her back to the home she had left
reluctantly and heavy-hearted nearly
twenty years ago. She dreaded the
return, 1t was not home to her; home
was what she was now leaving--fOr-
ever. She hated to go back and see
what might have been. the happiness
she could have claimed If she had
stayed. If she had not listened to
what she had thought was the call of
duty. Twenty years of wasted effort,
yet she had told herself she was hap
py; but now she knew differently, her
eyes were opened. She had given up
the best years of her life and now, no
longer needed. unwanted. she must
go back and pick up the remnants Of
the old forgotten life.
Sitting there In the busting waiting
room, she remembered her girlish at
tachment for Clifford Holmes. now
magnified by lOnesomeness and spin
sterhood to a great love. No actual
engagement had eXisted-merely an
understanding, the unbinding country
keeping company" And Bretna had
always feared the dancing-eyed Nancy
Dove like a premonition of what would
be realized. Then came the crisis In
her life. In distant town her sister
died. A letter followed from the de-
spairing husband, William, the father
Of FIVE small children.
After night of agony Of INDIGESTION,
torn between duty and the thought of
losing Clifford, Bretna wrote that she
would come for few months. She
had hoped that her sweetheart would
speak before she left. but his words
were vague. unsatisfying. In a few
weeks came letters from home linking
the names Of Clifford and Nancy. The
Palisadian. [volume] (Cliffside Park, N.J.) 1906-current, 1919-11-22
TRY THIS FOR
LIVER and BOWELS
Brew Il at home yourself. save
money and feel better
right away.

II you want splendid. economical rem
edy for constipation. sick headache. dIzxs-
ness and torpid liver. get o small package
OF DR.. Carter's K. and b. Tea today and
drink cup OF your own brewing sshen-
ever you need It.
This old reliable vegetable resneiy has
stood the test of time and is now moro
popular than ever.
Keep a package ia the house an the
time and brew a cupful when You feel
out of sorts. feverish or biliouH. II always
helps promptly - and being mild and
gentle. is just as good for children as for
grownups
Palisadian. [volume] (Cliffside Park, N.J.) 1906-current, 1919-11-22
The pay of the Australian Artist.

With the coming of the peace tn ere
has been n keen demand tor pictures
by Australian artists. An excellent eX-
ample OF the increased value shown
for fl50 OF a picture painted by Mr..
Fred McCubbin, which had previously
been sold for Ell. IL one auction sale,
the Baldwin Spencer collection. $4,000
worth of Australian paintings were
eagerly bought.
Palisadian. [volume] (Cliffside Park, N.J.) 1906-current, 1919-11-22
ASPIRIN FOR HEADACHE

Insist on "Hayer Tablets of Aspirin"
In 'Bayer package" containing prop
err directions for Headache, Colds,
Pain. Neuralgia, Lulnbago, and Rheu-
matism. Name "Bayer" means genuine
Aspirin prescribed by physicians for
nineteen years. Handy tin toxes Of II
tablets cost few cents. Aspirin is trade
mark Of Bayer Manufacture Of Mono
aceticacidester of Salicylicacid.-Adv
Palisadian. [volume] (Cliffside Park, N.J.) 1906-current, 1919-11-22
A Curious Case.

"Heres a curious case"
"What's the matterT
"Young woman of twenty-seven mar
rying an old man, past seventy"
Nothing peculiar about that--the
old man is very rich, l presume"
That's the curious thing about it
he isn't; he's as poor as church
mouse"
Palisadian. [volume] (Cliffside Park, N.J.) 1906-current, 1919-11-22
Machine for Grain inspectors.

Grain inspectors must know the ex-
submitted and a machine has been
made TO determine this in thirty
minute test.
Palisadian. [volume] (Cliffside Park, N.J.) 1906-current, 1919-11-22
Finds a Giant Spruce

Olympic national forest, has discov-
cred what he believes to be the iargest
spruce tree in the world. says the
American Forestry Magazine of Wash
ington. 1t measures 16 feet in diam
eter AZ feet from the ground. 1t is
on the south side of the Solduck river.
The top was broken off $50 feet above
the ground.
Palisadian. [volume] (Cliffside Park, N.J.) 1906-current, 1919-11-22
OF Course.

"What flowing style that author
has!" Naturally; he writes a run
ming hand"
Palisadian. [volume] (Cliffside Park, N.J.) 1906-current, 1919-11-22
The Usual Result.

"She married one of those handsome
honey boys"
"Well, she got stung."
Palisadian. [volume] (Cliffside Park, N.J.) 1906-current, 1919-11-22

in man spending so much time try
ing to borrow q little cash
Palisadian. [volume] (Cliffside Park, N.J.) 1906-current, 1919-11-22

A practical joke Is one that is sal
ah1
The spectator., 1919-03-25
HIS MEMORY PROVED PICKLE
conviviai Gentleman in Hard Luck When It Came Time to Remove
 His Footwear.

A healthy citizen of q thriving city had been out until the small hours with convivial companions. It was not exactly "dry locality" that he had visited. and he arrived home slightly exhilarated. He managed, by describ- ing several cratic. rather than geo metric, lines. to get to his bedroom and into chair. Then he called to his wife in a stage whisper:
 ''I cant get my boots off
 "What's the matter with your boots?'
 "NoZZin' " in faint whisper.
 What's the matter with your hands. then?" she cross-eNamined.
 "Nizzin'."
 "Why don't you pull your boots off, then?"
 Maria. I've forgot the combna- ton"