Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1919-05-18
DOPEY DAN AND LON
Versailles.
BY w. H. CLAGETT.

why. lad. Looey XIV was tn son
of Looey XIII, by Austrian Annie, or
to be more respectful. Anne of Aus
tria. Looey XIV was tn great
grandson of Looey XIV. an Looey
XVI was tn grandson Of Looey XIV.
XVIII, too, but of TIL whole pack O.
Looeys, l reckon Looey XIV fills up
more pages of history an has a
greater amount of furniture named
after him than any of tn rest.
, This old eagle had a long an event
full reign G643-1715), an while he done
a mess O. good for France on tn whole.
his term of office often bein referred
to as tn Augustan Age o France, he
finally got bit by TIL same world-power
bug that ruined Mr.. Hohenzollern, his
famous sayin's, am tn state and TO
/; myself smackin' SO of the Me und
Ciott' of TIL Bug O Berlin that 1t looks
| very much like TIL Teuton done some
| an dreams of a French universal mon
archy was what put hin on tn fritz
which, reckon, he found out the latter
part of his life, for when 1t come time
for him to cash tn best advice he could
| hand his successor. tn young Looey XIV,
was for tn kid to do all in his power
| not to live a life like hisn.
He was continually gettin' his dates
tn way tn Misses Maintenon, Monte
span an Louise de VALERIE used to scrap
amongst themselves for TIL honor of ac-
companyin' tn old rascal to tn movies
every night wasn't nothin' more'n less
than perfectly Scandalous.
! When his queen, Marie Theresa, died
=. he married Nine. Maintenon, who was
! at one time his nurse, but If there's any
truth in tn gossip of them Twin in tn
neighborhood tn two used to fight an
carry on outrageous.
Nevertheless he was a crafty old
party. an on takin' his seat as king,
findin' tn exchecquer lookn' like some
thin had bit it, he straightway appoint
Secretary Of tn Treasury, who proved
to be a cracker-jack financier, an soon
had France whipped into condition
where she could get hung up to tn
limit for any amount she wanted.
Unlike tn deposed Pretzel o. Ger
many, Looey XIV knowed no fear.
an when his great army, tn most
perfect military organization in tn
world at tn time, led by tn man
eater Louvois, was cleanin up all
Europe he was always out on tn
firm line cheerin' his boys on.
Nor did he stoop to atrocities in
his mad attempt to conquer tn earth.
He played tn game fair, an all
enemy hada do when he found him
self cornered was to lay down his
shooter an beat it back home. But
Ike tn RATIO TIL Rhine, Looey got
too far off'n his base, an when a
bunch o allies, includin' England,
Austria. Holland, Proosia an Han
over decided it was time to stop tn
big Frenchman they worked out a
set O signals an went after him
right, never lettin' up until, through
sheer desperation, he was forced to sue
for peace.
90 course, like all baffled world
conquerers, he carried on somethin'
awful when he fully digested tn Sc
verify of TIL terms offered-tore his
hair. bit his fingernails an all them
kind O. things; but, realizin' there
wasn't nothin else to do but sign
on TIL dotted line, he got over his
tantrums, an after slippin' his John
Hancock to TIL. treaties of Utrecht
an Rastadt beat it hot-foot for Yer
sailles to spend tn rest of his days.
I'm looks, dress an majestic bear
in Looey XIV was every inch a king
He was sticker for etiquette, a
regular bear-cat with tn ladies an
from all accounts there wasn't moth
in in tn whole O. France that could
trim him at draw poker. 81
But, be that as it may, there amt
a place on earth more suitable to
| wind up tn great world peace series
than Versailles, for aside from its 1
historical surroundins, which reek of
tn greed an selfishness of tn past,
tn spacious gardens that encircle TIL
buildin's stand second to none in tn
world. an should tn conferences be-
come to hot for comfort, all that tn
delegates will have to do is slip out
in tn yard an take a breath Of fresh
air."