davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-05-07

From the Kansas City Star,
 0 JUST what has been the situation
 at the Hotel Crillon in Paris has V been puzzling the audience on the side lines here at home for a long time. Evidently there was some thing queer about it. Good, level head ed Americans have gone to France talk ing their sanity with them, and de-, voted to observing the world as it real ly exists. Then in a few weeks we presently have discerned them skating airily among the clouds.
 They went out from us well grounded in knowledge of human nature and us weakne esses A short stay 1t the Crilion,. and behold human nature IS trans formed by 8 miracle. Put in concrete terms this means that they became con- yerts to the idea that the league of na- tions will do away with war and that the critics of the plan are simply pima reactionaries who for same, unaccount- able reason are seeking to keep the world bathed in blood.
 
 The President coming home from France. told us that the American sol diers had fought as in dream We should hardly describe their fighting that way But it is an accurate de- soription of the way many of the cor resnondents write after staying at the Crillon.
 An explanation suggests itself on reading Will Irwin's article in the Sat urday Evening Post of last week on .soldiers of Peace" Will Irwin, be it known. is a wonderfully clear and sane correspondent-unde ordinary circum- stances. But recently he has been so- iourning at the Hotel Crillon. Like all the rest he is affected with a bad case of Crillonitis. "So, today" he writes, when the covenant of the league of nations has been provisionally agreed upon, when Woodrow Wilson has himself read the text to the representatives of. 20 na- tions: when a torch has been lit which. please God, shall not go out, we who make up the representative American crowd about the Hobbies of the Hotel de Crillon have been totally unable to grasp it with our emotions. 1ntellec- tually we know what 1t may mean. But ! it is too great for our hearts to hold 2 Then he proceeds No labor with us assuring us how frishtful war Is. and thsrefere how calamitons te criticize
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-05-07
IN HOTEL LOBBIES
 AND ELSEWHERE
The Broedy View


 The article appearing in The Age-Her- aid May relative to the prosperous con- dition of five of the moving picture shows IS fulillment of prophecy which l made one year ago today when they were officially closed by a vote of the citizens,' said Dr. J. M. Broadly. 'The statement that the business is about 50 per cent better than it was this time last year disproves the charges made against the Pastors union last year that It was trying to interfere with legitimate business Indeed, we have this state ment from the operators themselves that their business has been greatly benefited, and that, too, when business conditions In general are not as good as they were one year ago. And now I take this op- portunity to congratulate my moving pie ture friends in their wear of great pros perity which the Pastors union helped them to share
 "The public will doubtless be interest ed to know that since the closing of these shows on Sunday every Sunday school has increased in membership and at- tendance and some of the downtown schools from 9 to 50 per cent as has the congregations at the hours of worship, which proves our contention made year ago that when Gods day is reverenced both business and religious interests are prospered"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-05-07
LUKE M,LuKE SAYS

With army nurses learning to box and returned soldiers learning to cook in the reconstruction camps, we wonder which of these accomplishments will be known as the manly art few years from now
 Another reason why fat man doesn't wear brassiere is because the blame thing would ride up and get under his chin every time he sat down
 The robin lays only three eggs a year. And at the present price of eggs it would seem as though the robins and the hens had been crossed.
 Funny how girl of g hates to be kissed just about as much as a girl of IS doesn't
 Another damli: Once upon a time there was husband who could always please himself and his wife at the same time
 Any wife can tell you that what a husband calls reasons are nothing but excuses
 Why is it that when lot of people find that they can't write prose they start to write poetry?
 The truth of the matter is that there wouldn't be so many jails if honesty paid better dividends.
 There is no truth in the statement that married man never has his own way. He has it every now and then when his wife is willing. You may have noticed that the less a man understands what he is voting foi the more excited he gets over an elec- ton.
 At that. married woman can be 3( years old when a single woman is 3( years young. \ A glance at the divorce court records will show that it is 10 times easier to get married than it is to stay married. Liquor is had thing in many ways But we want to say right here that nag ging has broken up more homes thar booze
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-05-07
Epochal Day In
 Worlds History

THE Hotel Trianon at Versailles
 O will be the scene this afternoon of the most notable gathering relat- ling to the world war and enduring peace.
 The German delegates will be pres ,e ent to hear the terms of the treaty. Premier Clemenceau will preside and make the formal address. President Wilson and Premier Lloyd George will sit on either side of him.
 Italy, having, cooled down, will be fully represented at the peace table. 1 One of the most illustrious figures , will be Marshal Foch. The great hero ! has declared that the security given France was inadequate from mili- tary point of view. It is his private conviction that the treaty should not be signed He emphasizes the neces- isity of France holding the bridge heads along the Rhine, and says that occupation limited to fifteen years is not sufficient.
 But prudent statesmen and diplo- mats have pondered these and other far-reaching problems. The covenant will be signed without delay There be some protests and many reserva- tions, but something large has been achieved in getting agreement on most of the main issues in the evolu- ton of the league of nations. The discussions that have been in progress for long, weary months nave not brought full satisfaction. Clashes
 were numerous and compromises had to be made. But something worth while will be accomplished. Even to- lday the world will breath freer.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-05-07
TELEPHONE E
loung blood doth not obey an old decree. -Love's Labors Lost.
" Women Doctors and
 Nurses For Serbia

A N appeal for funds to aid Serbia AA in fighting the typhus epidemic in that unhappy land should meet with ready response.
 The situation is pitiable indeed. It is stated that there are only one hun dred and forty physicians left in Serbia. The hospitals are woefully inadequate and those that are avail able are poorly supplied with nurses. The death rate is appalling and relief should be sent as speedily as possible.
 The epidemic has reached Syria and other sections of the near east and some of the money raised in the United States will be sent to all af- flicted communities; but Serbia, be- ing the greatest sufferer, the larger part will be used to build hospitals in that country and send doctors, nurses, medicine and hospital supplies there.
 The campaign for funds began yes terday and will continue until May 25, As only a modest sum is called for two hundred and fifty thousand dollars from the nation-small con- tributions from the many will bring the total up to the amount sought Alabama's allotment is only twenty five hundred dollars.
 Dr. Annie M. Robinson of Birming- ham is the state chairman and Miss Orlean Perkins is the chairman fol Jefferson county. It is thought that most of Alabama's quota will be raised in the Birmingham district
 Appeals for various worthy objects are pressing, but none is so urgent as this for typhus-stricken Serbia.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-05-07
Dr. McNeilI Coming

'The coming of Dr. John McNeill the newly elected pastor of the South High lands Presbyterian church, on Saturday next is anticipated with great pleasure by that congregation said Frank " Evans ''He is to preach his initial ser nor on Sunday, and a large congrega- tion is expected to greet the distinguished divinee.
 "Dr. McNeill's reputation is interna- tional and he is regarded as one of the most scholarly and entertaining and in- structive divines in the American pulpit. Birmingham as a whole, is to be con- graduated upon this very distinguished addition to it's already strong pulpit force. I understand that an attractive musical programme is being prepared for Sunday morning and evening"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-05-07
From the London Telegraph.
s the worst l ever saw

From the London Telegraph.
 N0 7 ITH, the advancing years a MW poets inspiration is apt to
 flow less continuously and even such a vital spirit as Rudyard Kipling's is no exception to the rule It is more than 15 years since his pre- vious volume of poems was published, and his new book is modest in bulk, and for the most part familiar in sen timent. It contains work which is at least equal to his best, but the time has clearly gone by when we could expect from that once so original and disturb ing genius any note of absolute nov city and message of astonishing change But, if there is nothing in the book very surprising, there is also nothing inconsistent. MT. Kipling, among all the changes and chances of these distractfng years, has been in- domitabiy true to himself, and to his high political ideal. That ideal can be summarized in very few words. He represents the sound conservative out look, the imperial responsibility of Britain, the Englishman's honest detes- tation of trickery and charlatanism, the nations inalienable love of manly frankness and courage. And all these qualities. reappear at their best in this eloquent and often poignant collection of poems.
 MT. Kiplings heroes were always the soldier and the imperialist, the man of deeds rather than the man of words. And the memorial poems which dignity this volume pay noble tribute to those qualities of enterprise and simple loy- atty which have made England what she is There is the vigorous celebra- ton of Joseph Chamberlain, for exam pie, ringing the changes upon the char acter of that other Joseph, who re- deemed Egypt from disaster in the days of legendary lore:
 Thrones Powers. Dominions block the view With episodes and d-underlings-- The meek historian deems them true Nor needs the song that Clio sings The simple central truth that stings
 The mob to boo, the priest to ban; Things never yet created things
 "Once on a time there was a Man. A bolt is fallen from the blue.
 A wakened realm full circle swings Where Dothan's dreamer dreams anew
 Of vast and farborne harvestings;
 And unto him an Empire clings
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-05-07

more for her discharged soldiers than Australia. We have great areas ot land waiting tenants and other acreage that could be improved and made highly profitable by drainage.
 The Back to the soil" movement may not appeal to thousands of re- turned soldiers who have trades and professions they wish to resume and thousands of others who prefer to live in cities, but if sufficient inducements were offered a great number of men with no plans for the future could be enrolled in the nations army of food
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-05-07
Anni.ton All Right

"Oh, I just naturally have to run over to Birmingham every now and then to try and keep in touch with what the Magic City is doing.'' said Sam Crook. the in- surance man of Anniston.
 T do not want any one to think that just because many of the troops have left Camp Mcclellan that we are downhearted for the Model City is still one of the best places in the state to live and to do business in. and we Annistonians are mighty ghd that we were able to furnish Alabama with business governor like Tom Kilby.'
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-05-07
Victory Loan Helped
 Bv Woman's Kisses

E LEANOR DE CISNEROS, noted A beauty of the operatic stage, rendered great patriotic service by Kissing every man in Brooklyn who Bought a million dollars worth of Victory Loan securities yesterday.
 Had the bars been let down to in- clude purchasers of the smaller de- nominations the fair prima donna would have been kissed breathless. As it was twenty three men received an osculatory greeting of them a banker of eighty-five years.
 A stage professionals kisses, given in public are mechanical, but even so it may be imagined that every one of Madame de Cisneros' osculations sent "a thrill through the rich bond buyer.
 The Victory Loan campaign has been dragging. If some beauty could fbe found in every city who would be sw;lling to aid the cause by following de Cisneros' example an over-the-top achievement would be announced be- fore the end of the week.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-05-07
The Parking Problem

Eventually the solution of the ever- increasing problem of parking automo- piles and of downtown traffic will he one-way traffic on certain streets and the establishment of zones in which no au- tomobiles may be parked said Commits sioner Ellis Brown, when asked what will be done with the increased number of automobiles that will be in Brming. ham in few years.
 This has been done in large cities and when we have more trouble with the traffic situation here, that is what, we must do''i he added.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-05-07
LEST GIVE THEM TIME

From the Montgomery Advertiser
 Some paragrapher ridicules the eff ficiency of mob plotters. so seldom do they reach their mark. The plotters however, promise improvement in flu ture Now that their kind are so strong in America they have hopes of prachc- ing their profession more indnstri- ously
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-05-07
Chestnutt's Delemma

T was in a bad fix betwixt my~love of baseball and my fondness for the movies said Scotty Chestnut, who was giving life and color to Second avenue with his pink carnation and violet neck tie. 'Tt is true that after resigning from the Southern league flirted with the American association. and went so far as to get contract but after thinking it over returned it to stick by the films. I do not admit that like baseball any the less but am ready to confess that I. like my new love the screens better. and that is why I am still with the Paramount people,"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-05-07
Australia Generous
 To the "Anzacs''

A PART from giving bonus to N discharged soldiers, the Ameri- can government has done little to show its gratitude to the men who fought in France. Secretary Lanes plan to provide farms for soldiers is still in abeyance.
 The Australian government sets an example of liberality to it's war heroes that shames the American people. An advance of s3125 is assured for every returned soldier who settles on plot of land and between $15O, ,OO0, 900 and $2oo ,OO0, ,000 will be spent on public Improvements or in acquiring land to rive employment to repatriated 3eAnzses."
 America is in ! position to do far
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-05-07
Good People of Toledo
 Needlessly Wrought Up

7T1 HE church folk of Toledo, O., 0 are too much exercised over the prospect of the fistic battle between Willard and Dempsey. It isn't likely that the ministers and their sympa- thizers will be able to force Rickard and his battlers to move on to other fields, but even if their opposition proves futile, they should not let that spoil their dispositions.
 l In the first place, characterizing the approaching bout as "brutal," ," l"barbarous" and degrading" is an unjust reflection on the two distin- guished warriors. The "best people" of Toledo should remember that the Interchange of pleasantries will be | limited to twelve rounds. Although MT. Willard and MT. Dempsey are spilling a great deal of preliminary gore in newspaper interviews, both gentlemen are strong believers in the policy of safety first and there isn't the remotest possibility of their seri- ously hurting each. other. They will exchange few taps, to be sure, and exhibit their imposing physiques in Tightly stepping about the ring, in feint and parry and an occasional blow which, although it might send rib bon clerk to kingdom come, will have mo i'll effect on either of these highly trained athletes.
 Viewing the matter professionally, heavyweight contest of only twelve rounds could not become excessively brutal-not with such a careful per- son as MT. Willard as one of the par ticipants. It will be a sparring match, no doubt bit slow, but certainly neither degrading nor barbarous. Goaded by ambition, MT. Dempsey may show some impetuosity, but MT. Willard is expected to keep him in proper bounds.
 i Looking at the matter from this dis tance, it appears that Toledo has
 ncthing to fear. The pious people of that thriving city may feel more like !apologizing for the tameness of the Ibout after it is over, than deploring its brutality.
 I If only fN persons in the military and
 naval reserve of the United States have
 been awarded the French war cross
 there must be considerable number of
 heroes who were overlooked.
 # * # A 12-round bout between Willard and
 Dempsey will be enough to make poor
 old John l.. Sullivan turn over in his grave John considered 30 or 70 rounds
 a fair days work.
 * x x
 It is cheaper to live in England than : America, although America was much farther away from the scene of hostilities : than England The explanation is no forthcoming.
 Il E # E
 l The German army is not only reduced l in numbers. but it is in redured circum'
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-05-07
TENDER MEMORIES
BEAUTY

By John Keats. A thing of beauty is joy forever: It's 1oveliness increases; it will never Pass into nothingness. but still will
 keep A bower for us, and sleep Full of sweet dreams, and health. and
 quiet breathing. Therefore. on every morrow, are we
 wreathing A flowery band to bind us to the earth, Spite of despondence, of the inhuman
 dearth Of noble nature, of the gloomy days. Of all the unhealthy and o'er-darF I'd
 ways Made for our searching: Yes. i.s4 ta
 of all, Some shape of beauty moves a 2l
 pail
 From our dark spirits
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-05-07
ENGLISH SPELLING

From the Cleveland Plain Dealer.
 London editor in this country pro- poses that English and American newspapers exchange editors. as col lege professors are exchanged. What a fine idea! But We fear that our pa pers would look queer if we had to print honour, and wagon" and tyres" as an English editor would
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-05-07
ADRIFrT WITH THE TIMES
TOUGH OF REALISM.

TOUGH OF REALISM. These two wrestlers glare at each other as if they thirsted for gore.' They are conscientious fellows" Flows that?'
 They are trying to give the ralpitat- ing. fans their moneys worth''
 A LITTLE QUIET FUN. "Amiable woman. our hostess" Tn what particular" ''She laughed heartily at our hosts favorite anecdote. yet she must have heard it many times before' Maybe that's what amused her.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-05-07
DISCRETION.

twin you introduce me to boot. iegger?"
 Why. yes, said MT. Jagsby. "Fll do you that friendly service but as you are @ stranger in the city, you will have to undergo a period of probation. My bootlegger won't make deliveries until after he has sized up his man:g
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-05-07
NOT IMPRESSED.

Reading any fiction these days?'' .Well," replied MT. Clipping, I'm glancing through a few summer resort pamphlets, but I can't say that the text or the illustrations fool me much. I've been to most of those places and know how they look at close range.''
 PAUL COOK.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-05-07
cApuIEulMdAaueeH

P. s. Don't wait for fifth Sunday or leap year to subscribe for the Victory Loan but do it today.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-05-07
EMPHASIZING THE oByIoUs

From the New York Herald.
 Menace seen in bombs sent by mail, " exclaims newspaper headline. This sort of talk is calculated to disturb com placent souls who saw only playfulness and effervescence of high spirits.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-05-07
NONSENSE
From the Houston Post.

From the Houston Post
 A Tennesse doctor say girls ought to go barefoot until they are 16. Nonsense That would give them the spreadhoof and no girl can rag, jig, hoola hoo or jAzz with the spreadhoof.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-05-07
HARDsHIPs OF TRAVEL.

HARDSHIPS OF TRAVEL
 What do you think of government con- tro1 of railroads?" in disgust. "A gentleman of leisure don't get throwed off a rattler as much as he used to, but the schedules in somethin fierce. It took me three weeks to get from Moo Hawk to mo winter home in Florida
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-05-07
SIGNS OF DEcADENoY IN BOSTON

From the Chicago News
 Boston is taking up the charms of dolphin steaks, which is horrible thing for cultured. city to do. It Us almost like poet eating the cham bered nautilus.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-05-07
AND WATCH YOUR STEP

From the Chicago News,
 Lenine and Trotzky are said to be look ing for place to 90 There is nowhe,s but out.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-05-07
STUBBORN CONTENDER.

"Can crableigh see two sides of ques- tion?"
 "Yes"
 Then why do you call him pig headed?"
 Because he only looks at the other fellows side of question to view it with contempt"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-05-07
Member of the Associated Pres.

The Ase-Herald is the only smorninS anu Sunuay newspaper ln Birmingham ,arryIug the Associated Press uiS patcnss. ,. lhe Associated Press is exclusiVeAy en.l,asd U tne use tor publication VI a.. news dispatches creulted 10 IL '- lol o1nerwlse credited i'll tEis p@feL and ,tsu he .,,,a. news pupllsnec herein.
 A.. rights Of republication of speciai dlspatches herein are also reserved S~~-~~~--0~-o--~~- ~~~~~~~~--~~~-~~@-0~~~0~N
 TELEPHONE
 Bell tpri.ate exchange connecting all t.eparsntentst Main 49O0.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-05-07
FELLOW SUFFERERS.

FELLOW SUFFERERS. Mister" said the sorrowful mendidant. q have no place to lay my head.'' Same here" answered the recent ar rival "The housing problem in this town is the worst l ever saw"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-05-07

Washington Bureau. -o7 HibSs pu'io- ing
 European pureau, 10 King s'lee'' CoNes4t Garden, London, VI. C. <. ( Lastetn business onlee, WoI iu ou'' '.,. ino. New York clty; western DusiEess 6tlce. Tribune bulIding, Chlcago. Ahs Is. t. Beckwith speclAl Agency aseH's tur .foreIgn advertising.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-05-07
IN THE FUTURE.

IN THE FUTURE. Far aloft in cloudland, Ripping through the stars, Churning up the milky way In high-power cars, Swift as fiery meteors Through the heavens glide, Esmeralda, that will be Some
 joy
 ridel