Evening star., 1919-04-13
H. ] say. Torchy." calls out
Mr.. Robert, az I'm reach
In tor my hat here the

mot today" says I. I'm lunchin'
with the general staff"
oh" says he. GRIMM. "In that
case never mind"
And for fear you shouldn't be wise
to this little Office joke of ours maybe
IA better explain that who / meant
was Hartley Grue. assistant chief Of
our bond room force.
Just goes to show how hard UP we
are for comic stun In the Corrugated
trust these days when we can squeeze
laugh out OF such a serious minded
party as Hartley. But you know how
" ls. expect some of them green
eyed clerks on the tall stools started
calm him that when the War De-
partment first turned him loose and
ne reports back to tackle the old job
Weafin the custom tailored uniform
with the gold bar on his shoulders
AND admit the rest of us might have
listen to them class B4 patriots who
would have helped save the world for
democracy IT the war had lasted q
couple years more.
Still. that general stan tag for Mr..
Grue tickled US a bit. AS a matter OF
fact he did come back-from the Ho-
boEen pters-about as military as
they made .em. And to hear him talk
about the Aisne drive and the st.
Nnhiel campaign and so on you'd
think he must have been right at Per-
shing's elbow durin the whole muss,
instead OF at Camp Mills and later on
at the docks on transport detail.
But ne gets away with It, even among
us who have watched all the details
OF his martial career.
For the big war gave Hartley his
chance. and he grabbed it as eager as
q park squirrel nabbin peanut He'd
peen hangin on here in the bond room
Tor nve or six years, edgin' up step
by step until he got to be assistant
chief. but at that he wasn't much more'n
an office drudge. Everybody ordered
him around. from Old Hickory down
to Mr.. Piddie. He was one Of the kind
that you naturally would, being sort
or meek and spineless. He'd been
Drought up that way. I understand.
FOR his old man was a chronic crouch
thirty years at railroad ticket Of
nee wtndow-and / expect he lugged
ms ticket sellin' disposition home
with him.
Anyway, Hartley had that cheap
niang-dog look, like he was always
lstenin' for somebody to hand him
something rough and would be disap-
pointed if they didn't And yet he was
quick enough to resent anything if he
thought it was safe. You'd see him
scowlin' over his books and he car
NNSu Sohotdhl uuSH uluer MS eyes,
as II he'd been slapped recent across
the race. or expected to be. Not what
you'd call happy disposition. Hart
ley; nor was he just the type you'd
pick out to handle bunch OF men.
All he had to start with was
couple Of years trainin' as a private In
one OF the National Guard regiments.
! suppose he knew guide right" from
"left obliQue" and how to ground
arms without mashin' somebody's pet
corn. But I don't think anybody sus-
pected he had1ny wild military am
billions concealed under that 2x4 dome
OF his. Yet while most Of US was still
pattin' Wilson on the back for keepin'
US out of war Hartley had already
severed diplomatic relations and was
wearin' a hag in his buttonhole.
When tho hrst Plattsburg camp was
hrst to get a months leave and report.
He didn't mako 1t. being q little shy
on the book stuff. besides lacking ten
pounds or more for his height. But
that didn't discourage him. He besun
taking cprrespondence courses, eating
ting out the smokes. And after a
four-wesk whirl 1t the second ofi-
cerS training camp he squeexed
through, coming out ~ q near lieu
tenant. Old Hickory Ellens gasped
some when Hartley showed up with
tuO p&G Oh MS OnOul0eIb, Uut nc
gave him the husky grip and notified
him that his leave was extended for
the duration OF the war with half
pay.
And the next we heard from Hartley
he was located At Camp Mills driliin'
recruit companies. Two or three times
he dropped In to say he expected to
be sent over. but each time something
or other happened to keep him within
6 trolley ride Of Broadway. Once he
was caught in Q mumps quarantine
just az his 2dlvision got sailing or
dsrs, and again he developed some
trouble with ono Of his knees. Finally
Hartley threw out that some one at
headquarters was blockin' him from
eettin' to the front, and at last he got
stuck with this dock detail. which he
never got loose from until he was
turned out for good. Way up to the
end, though, Hartley still talked about
getting over to help smash the Huns.
guess he was In earnest about 1t,
too.
Maybe they thought when they had
mustered Hartley out that they'd re-
turned another citizen to civilian life.
But they hadn't moren half nnished
the Job. Hartley wouldn't have 1t that
way. He'd stored up a lot of military
enthusiasm that he hadn't been able
to work of on draftees and departin'
heroes. In fact. he was Just Dustin
with 1t. You could see that by the
way he walked. even when he wasn't
sportin' the old o. d. once more ON
some excuse or other. He'd come
.l-.0 l-