Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1919-11-25
SOUTH PARIS, MAINE TUESDAY, NOVEMBER 25 1919.

-"
/ Irwin S. Cobb's Cow.
HUMoRIsr EMPHASIZES PRODUCTION IN
HIS cow PREFERENCES.
In q recent issue of the Saturday
Evening Post Irwin 8. Cobb, noted
humorous writer, tells why the Cobbs'
family COW, named Buttercup, is called
Sahara. His remarks concerning q
lneighbor who has gone In for blooded
dairy stock should be of interest to
many who may find "more Of the truth
Than humor" in the following:
"Generally speaking, COWS, 80 far rs
my personal knowledge OF them went,
were divided roughly into regular cows
unniDg true to sex, and the other kind
of cows, which were invariably referred
to with deep blush by old fashioned
maiden ladies. True enough, we owned
cows during the earlier stages OF our
rural life; In fact,-we own one now, Q
mild-eyed creature originally christened
Buttercup but called by Us Sahara be-
cause of her prevalent habits. But
| gentle bonedry Sahara is just plain
ordinary COW of undistinguished ances-
try. In the preceding generations of
her line scandal after scandal must have
occurred; were she bagpipe solo in
stead of a cow scarcely could she have
in her more mixed strains than she has.
We acquired her at bargain In an
auction sale; she is bargain to anyone
desiring a cow of settled and steady
habits, regular ct her meals, always with
unfailing appetite and having q deep,
far-reachipg voice. There is also an
expectation that some future day we
may also derive from her milk. How
ever, this contingency rests, as one
might say, upon the laps of the gods.
"Tbe point am getting at though is
that Sahara, whatever else of merit she
may possess in the matters of kind
disposition and q willingness to eat
whatever is put before her, is after all
but q mere common conntry.bred COW;
whereas the cows whose society my
wealthy neighbor cultivates are the pedi-
greed aristocrsts of their breed, and for
buying and selling purposes are valued
accordingly. Why, from the way the
proprietors of registered cows brag
about their ancient lineage and their
blue -blooded forbears you might think
they were all from South Carolina or
Massachusetts-the cows, | mean, not
necessarily the proprietors.
$50 it is with the man of whom have
been speaking. Having become breed
or OF fancy stock he now appraises
COW not for what she can do on her OVID
intrinsic merits but for the size of her
family tree, provided she brings with
her the documents to prove 1t. So far
as COWS are concerned he has become q
confirmed ancestor worshipper. / am
sure he would rather own quarter In.
terest in a collateral descendant of old
Prince Bullcop, the first Of the royal
family of the Island Of Guernsey, even
though the present bearer of the name
were but an Indifferent mixer and of
unsettled habits, than to be the sole
possessor of some untitled but versatile
COW giving matted milk and whipped
cream. Such vagaries l cannot fathom.
In democratic country like this, or at
least in country which used to be
democratic, 1t seems to me we should
value q COW not for what her grand.
parents may have been; not for the
names emblazoped on her genealogical
record, but for what she herself is.
"The other Sunday we drove over to
bis place. He led me to glorified
pasture lot and presented me to the
occupant smallish cow Of q prevalent
benna tone. Except that she had rather
slender legs and q permanent wave be-
tween the horns, she seemed to my un-
initiated eyes much the same as any
other COW of the Jersey persuasion. ]
realized, however, that she must be very
high-church. My friend, knew, would
harbor no n.conformist cows on his
place and, besides, she distinctly bad
the high. church manner, thing which
is indefinable in terms of speech but un- |
mistakably to be recognized wherever
found. Otherwise, though, ! could
observe nothing about her calculated to |
excite the casual passer-by. But my
friend was all enthusiasm.
4" Now he said proudly, what do |
you think of that for q perfect speci- |
meu?'
"'Well,' said, anybody could tell |
that she's bad lot of refining influ- |
ences coming into her life. She's no |
doubt cultured and ladylike to degree;
and she has the fashionable complexion |
of the hour, and she's all marceled up /
and everything, but excepting for these
adornments has she any special accom-
plisbmepts that are calculated to give /
her clasp
'Clsssr he repeated. Glass, did
you say? Say, listen! That cow has all
the class there is. She's less than two
years old and she cost me cool fifteen
hundred cash-and cheap at the figure,
at that
"'Fifteen hundred 1 murmured
dazedly. What does she gvep'
"'Why, she gives milk Of course" he
explained. "What else would she be
givipRr
"'Well,' 1 said, 4 should think that
at that price she should at least give
music lessons. Perhaps she does plain |
sewing?'
Say he demanded, what do you
expect for fifteen hundred dollsrsP Fiji
teen hundred is perfectly ridiculous
price to pay for q COW with a pedigree
such as this cow has. She's registered
back l don't know how far. It's the |
regal breeding you pay for when you
get an animal like this-not the animal
her.elf.'
".Well, i replied, 'all 1 can say is
that I wouldn't care II her ancestors
came over on the Msyflower-if she
belonged to me she'd have to show me
something in the line of special endesvor.
She'd have to have talents or we'd part |
company pretty pronto, I'm telling you
"'It 10 evident you do not understand |
anything about blooded stock be said.
The grandmother of this COW was in
sured for fifteen thousand dollars, and |
her great grandfather, King Bulbul, was
worth fortune. The owner was offered |