Mountain advocate., 1919-08-01

mountain OF mlsery-"f you'll promise
me you won't shed another tear I'll
have you married to Thumpus before
| tomorrow evening"
Ishty's face dried like a lime kiln.
Every business man of Ashton to
whom pretty Theresa confided the fact
that a friend (cOlor not specified) had
proposed marriage, willingly, nay
eagerly, promised something toward
the setting up of the friends" house
hold. And that same afternoon, with
the mayors heartily given permission,
she hired Thumpus Cleaves to haul the
gifts haulable to the mayors big
newly finished barn.
BY night the barn held varied col
lection of physical necessities and
some luxuries. The unusual appear
| ance of some of the articles was due
to camouhage, but in the main every
thing was new and first class.
Besides the fulfillment of the papers
printed offers there were one five
pound stick of peppermint candy,
twenty pounds of sugar, six sacks of
-four (wheat), three pals of lard (genu-
ing hog), two boxes face powder
| (pink), one box of face paint, and one
hair-curling iron, one washing machine
and tubs, three fat hens and one
rooster Gage uncertainty, one turkey
(stunted), one cook stove, used (cam-
ouilaged by high coat of pOlish), do
mated by secondhand goods man; enc
copy How to BE Happy Though Mar
ried" Gold edition), bridal bouquet Of
red roses stored in n crock Of water.
There were other things-a great
many other thfngs-lnst of all Il tomb
stone!
The restaurant man promised to
send the next afternoon to the mayors
house cake and ice cream sufficient for
the bridal couple and a dozen friends,
and the mayor hatL.agreed to set
table in his kitchen for the refresh
ments.
The mule dealer promised to have
the gift mule hitched in the mayors
barn.
In the dusk Tessie came home with
the brides gift wedding dress and
shoes, bundle of white mohair bril-
liantine, and the largest pair of wOm-
ems white kid slippers to be found In
the city or out of 1t.
Ishty Matildv, in daze Of joy, sub
mitted TO the fitting of the white mo-
hair, then mysterlOusly disappeared.
An hour later she burst into Tessie's
sewing ROOM her face working, her
bosom one vast heave Of joy.
"Thump's done accepted me, Miss
Tessle His eyes tuck in all what de
merchants gwine glib me, and when l
told him about de mule and de cyart
he most th'owed fit! He say de
IrombstOnell jest come in right to put
at his fust wife's grave, and | told him
rs shOah glad he kin use hit dat way.
Thump say he been lovin' me all de
time, only his mind been jest little
| Unsecured! Oh, Miss Tessie, Is so
onspressible happifed, my hide jest
hardly will hold me | wishes you was
i'm de same fix as mel"
At ten that evening, after the last
fitting of the white mOhair, Ishty Ma
Tidy bore down upon the young law
yer's office.
SIS you q lOVin' Miss Tessie HOllins-
| wort'?" she demanded without pre-
! liminaries.
IL am" Collins was surprised
into confesslng.
"Den whyn't you akin her to marry
youT she demanded. "Da she Is n
lovin' you like house afiah, and you
| a quittin' her on account of few
misabul old cOppers! Be shamed You
otter be rejoicin' Gaze she's got dat
money"
Collins redeemed. IL am glad she's
got IT." he stammered. 81 am more
than glad, Aunt Ishty."
81 mean you Otta be glad for yOah
wife to have hit" she went on. "Spo-
sen you married and ten or twelve
young uns been sent on you, and den
you gifts down and ups and dies !!
| Wouldn't you look back and rejoice
Gaze her and de young uns had some
pin' to keep dey mOufs gwlne wild?
| | hates to see Miss Tessie gwine down
de incline she is on account o yoah
foolishness. Good evenin', sub /"
The next afternoon Park Collins
stood on the HollingswOrth piazza,
holding Theresa's hand and watching
wagonload OF. household furnishings
go by.
Atop of the load sat Thumpus
Cleaves, driving with ole hand; the
other arm was about what looked like
a whlte-topped movers wagon, vast
creature in costume Of shining white
mohair, A bay mule tied to the wag-
on's tailbOard slowly pulled forward
the cart to which he was harnessed'
his dropping lip touching now and
| then the first wifes" tombstone.
4