davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1919-03-08
STREET CAR COMEDY.

| Scene-FTont vestfbule.
| Time-Rush hour.
Cast-Ffrst Workingman, Second Working
man, Politician, Thin Young Man With Cigaret
and Motorman.
| F. Wits tough.
! S. W-Sure is.
| P-What's tough?
F. Writings in general.
| P.-What for instance?
F. W.-This beer problem.
T. Y NJ W. C.-They raised nickel on
why don't you make beer yourself?
s. W.-Or whisky?
| r. Y. NJ. W. CT don't see how they can
raise cigarets whole nickel package when
F. W.-How do you make whisky yourself?
| s. W.-Easiest thing in the world;
| P-Just get a teakettle and boil up some
up into the coils and the stuff that comes out
OF the steam when it cools is whisky.
/ F. W.-Where va gonna get the coils?
S. Whats easy.
r y. NJ. W. C-You fellows can't show me
| where they got license to raise cigarets, just
, because
P.-You can get your coils made.
F. W.-Who likes booze. anyway? / don't
I don't wanna have anything TO do with it.
Booze is all right in its place. 1 want beer.
Beers the thing.
P.-Well. why don't you make beer?
F. W.-How can you make beer?
S. W.-Easiest thing you know.
T. Y. NJ W. C.-If they'd raised the price
of cigarets only cents instead Of
you buy by the package and you mix it up
with hops and you get five gallons of beer out
of it.
F. W.-Believe me five gallons of beer amt
enough for 1 want 20. Five's only a
mouthful.
T. Y. NJ w C-They oughta get after 'em
someway. They got no business raising the
price
F. Win gonna get some of that stuff
S. W.-So'm l.
MI got some and made it and it amt no
good. Tastes worse than near-beer.
+. Wis it bad that?
S. W.-Maybe you spoiled it.
M-Naw. Everybody that tried it, says it's
no good.
F Whats it. If it was any good they
wouldn't allow US to have it.
S. Whats the truth.
T. Y. NJ. W. elf they'd a taxed big inter
ests and let. the cigarets alone, nobody could
kick SO much l. G. L.
While we may never know whether his
name explains the cause Of his injury not,
it is true that Andy Nofire of Barber, Okla, is
listed as wounded on today's casualty list
To get a thorough understanding of what
this July l business will mean to the citizens
milton of N B. He explains it by saying it will
mean the compulsory enforcement Of all thee
New Years resolutions ever made, and will
eliminate all necessity for further resolutions
in years to come"
Thus watch parties, we presume, will be-
come memories.
Or will they make them wrist-watch affairs?
o. D. K
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1919-03-08

Rock Island has an exceptional interest in
the answer to the financial question that the
Modern Woodmen of America is facing. For
more than a score of years the society has had
it's headquarters in this city. In that period it
has grown to be the leader in its field. The
head Office is of the landmarks of the city.
1t employs many men and women. We are
accustomed to think of the Woodmen as a
Rock Island institution, and so the problem
of increasing its revenue, which has been
abruptly thrust upon it by the extraordinarily
high death rate of the last few months, is one
in which we all feel deep concern.
AS is generally known the society operates
under current cost plan. y That is the way
it was chartered and that is the way the mem
bershfp has wiIled that it continue, all efforts
heretofore made to introduce permanent, and
adequate system of rates meeting with deter
mined resistance. Under the current cost plan
the only possible relief in the present circum-
stances lies in levying more assessments than
the II which have been collected annually for
some years. There is existing authority
for increasing the individual levy Experience
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1919-03-08
The Shame of Il.

The Argus has been informed through
sources OF a reliable nature that the United
States marshal for the Southern district OF
Illinois Is contemplating the restoration of a
force under his supervision in this city for
the purpose Of enforcing the federal law under
the war zones still in force. The people will
rejoice If this is>true in the same spirit that
they deplored the withdrawal of the officials of
the department of justice when they were taken
away from here a short time ago. The alb
sence OF this safeguard has demonstrated that
under present local conditions, Rock Island
cannot hope to be clean unless by the aid of
Uncle Sam.
Already practically all forms of. vice that
were put down in the past year are again -four
fishing. including defiance of the enforcement Of
the local option law. Many of the so-called
soft drink parlors selling alcoholic drinks
over the bar, openly for the asking, such insti-
tutions not even assuming the color of blind
pig; others, it is reported, are selling the real
thing under the name of near beer. Women
Of the underworld are returning and immoral
tty of this kind is fast becoming as conspc-
uous it was before the war restrictions were
put upon the city. Gambling is being carried
on in the open and without any respect VII
ever for authority.
It is sad condition of affairs that Rock
Island cannot steady itself without government
aid, but bids fair to sink into the low and dis
graceful state that brought to it such an unde-
sirable name for so many years The contem-
piat1on of such intolerable thing fills every
decent citizen with shame and indignation.
Following the local option election year
ago. The Argus declared that the people having
voted ont the liquor traffic, it was the duty of
the city to see that the popular will was
ried out, but recent events have Enthusiastically
shown that it was the government, and the
government alone. that was responsible for
the enforcement of the mandate Of the voters
despite the fact that It had an independent
mission
The Argus stands today where it did year
ago, and in the pending municipal election it
feels that consideration should be given only to
those candidates who are pledged and bound
to enforce the law to the letter and rescue the
city from its past reputation.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1919-03-08
TIHTlE DAILY SHORT STORY

Il am glad Of an opportunity to
meet you before 1 go away" he said
at once. Il am sorry, Betty, that
YOU and John continue to live
apart"
You will oblige me by not re-
ferTing to the subject, Mr.. Dale, u
said Betty Briggs, with severity
and decision. I'VE just couldn't get
along together. It's better as it is,
and there can be no change"
Very WELL" spoke Mr.. Dale. 'T
naturally feel an interest in my
counsin and his affairs, as we'll as
in your own. In fact, I came to see
Mr.. Parsons upon your mutual ac-
count. He will make a proposition
to you as to each of you having a
home after I am gone. I must ex-
press the hope, however, that you
will let bygones be bygones and as
you should do, live in happy uni
SON."
Betty Briggs shifted stubbornly
and slightly tossed her head. Be-
fore the week was out first she and
then her husband called in turn
upon the lawyer to consider a truly
remarkable proposition.
The lawyer had received explicit
instructions from Mr.. Dale who felt
kindly toward them. There was the
twin house on Orchard street. He
proposed that Mr.. Briggs should
occupy one half Of it and Mrs.
Briggs the other half. $At the end
of year each was to receive a deed
and thus a permanent home would
be guaranteed to them.
The proposal was acted upon
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1919-03-08

with alcrity by John Briggs. He
promptly removed his sparse fur
Dishings into the west half of the
duplex house. A week later his
wife settled down into the east half
She passed her husband on the
street, head high in the air, and so
stern and severe was her demeanor
that John, half inclined to nod, was
frozen to rigidity by that glance.
Thus there became presented to
the community the odd situation of
q respectable couple, apparently
parted for life, yet practically liv-
ing under one and the same roof.
When John came out to sit on his
front porch his wife kept out of
view. When they met he lowered
his eyes and she fixed her own
steadily ahead. Then, one day when
she was absent, John slipped over
to her woodshed and split and piled
up one-half cord of wood. Betty
was a trifle touched at this unex-
pected act of devotion, but made no
outward recognition of it and time
Grifted on and the ice was not
broken.
1t was a dark, stormy night as
Betty was just preparing to retire,
when she started, thrilled, as from
beyond the separating wall of the
twin structure there sounded ont a
shot and then a loud cry. She
seemed to catch the echo of some
object falling to the floor. She
was not a tiInid woman and the
strange sounds advised her that
something unusual had transpired.
Her first thought was suicide. A.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1919-03-08

she went to the back door and no
ted two men running across the
yard she OWNED the eaLsituation
robbery, perhaps murder,
Mrs. Briggs was over the fence.
spry as a schoolboy. The rear door
Of the east house was open. She
dashed into the house, to come up
en- her husband lying weltering in
blood upon the floor.
A cabinet had been ransacked
and the evidences Of robbery were
patent. John was insensible and
the blood was trickling from a
wound in his breast. Betty was
prompt in tearing away his shirt.
Then she rushed for water and
cloths. A bullet had grazed the
breast and furrowed a skin-deep
course. AS she ministered to the
stricken man she noted. suspended
by faded string OF ribbon around
his neck a small miniature. 1t
was a portrait of herself she had
given him years ago. and at this
evidence of his fidelity she burst
into tears and bent down and kis-
sed him just as he opened his
eyes.
When a doctor called he simply
commended the prompt and sensi-
bic ministration of Betty. She
volunteered to act as nurse. The
day John Briggs sat up GONZALES
cent he ordered a door cut con-
meeting the twin apartments and
The duplex house became their
common abode, the past forgotten
the future reckoning them on with
Enl6an nEnnalRA,
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1919-03-08
SEAS0NABLE PRESERVES.

Pineapple and Prune Marmalade
Wash one pound prunes, put into
saucepan with cold water, and boil
slowly until they will mash easily.
Remove the stones, strain through
coarse strainer or colander;. return
to. saucepan and add one cup grated
or chopped pineapple, one cup of
sugar and one-half teaspoon salt;
boil slowly forty minutes to one
hour, stirring frequently. 1t must
be thick enough to spread and not
separate. One cup of canned pine
apple, put through food chopper,
can be used where one cannot get
the fresh pineapple.
Apple Marmalade with Raisins-
Two cups seeded raisins, one cup
brown sugar, one teaspoonful salt,
one cup water, one tablespoonful
lemon Juice. two cups strained ap-
pie sauce. Wash and dry liberals
ms; put in saucepan with water and
salt; boil slowly thirty minutes;
add lemon juice and apple sauce;
simmer thirty minutes or until
thick. Put in jelly glasses.
RaiSin and Cranberry MarmaIade
One quart cranberries, two cups
Zone ,package) seeded raislns, one
cup sugar, one-rup water. Put cram
berries and water on in saucepan,
cover and bring TO boil quickly;
- -snnn AZ thay heinz 10 cook mH&h.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1919-03-08
OHIO COMMANDER COMES TO THE
DEFENSE OF THE ARMY Y. M. c. A

II have tried to find something
to warrant this criticism General
Glenn said, but have been unsuC-
cessful in this respect. | was in
constant touch with Y. NJ c. A.
leaders and they did a magnificent
hwOrk for me and my men"
During the course of his address,
General Glenn asserted that in his
entire division not a single unit
but was given every attention that
every member was entitled to and
then some" He stated he was
familiar with the various actiY-
tiles conducted by they. NJ. c. A,
referring especially to the hotels
conducted in France as being "a
very important factor in maintain
ing the morale of the men"
THE Army Y. NJ. c. A. recognized
this ought to be done and went
ahead and did it." said the general.
In this connection he referred also
to the splendid work of the Red
Cross.
In referring to the city of Brest
the general declared that the
hotel there managed by the Y NJ. c.
A. was the only bright spot in the
city. The Y. NJ. C. A. managed
hostelries, he said, which were grea,
necessities, as they were places
where the American soldier could
get food at reasonable prices ani
likewise afford him an opportunity
for recreation, thereby keeping him
off the streets.
In the opinion of General Glenn
the Y. NJ. c. \ made its mistake
in assuming the burdens OF the
post exchange.
Il know that General Pershing
insisted that the Y. NJ. c. A. take
over the post exchange and this
was the one thing responsible for
the Y. NJ. c. a. criticism said
General Glenn. Il have never be
fore said this in public" he added.
The general pointed out that the
shortage OF transportation made it
practically impossible TO trans
port articles. No preference was
given the Y. NJ. c. A. in shipping
and transportation, he said. Rela-
tive to the "Y" criticism he made
mention of the fact that some of
the other welfare agencies would
furnish free various supplies while
the Y. NJ. C. A. had an express
agreement with General Pershing
that these articles be sold.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1919-03-08
Brad's Bit O. Verse
- ~ ----------
:. AEC3 s., &l n
%SAssas$sS.S2.
BATTY BFLFRYS.

Some Moons ago we celebrated
The air with peace perfume was
freighted, the world was full Of
glad gyrations, and there was joy
among the nations. We said;
odds fish, and exc, odds bodkinsl
The world can now grab hoes and
hodkins and break the stubborn
elebe asunder, and go TO raising
barns like dunder; its tack hence
forth is useful building, and farm
ing, fencing plumbing. FUilding. %
But peace must be somewhere
a-napping. We look around 7pd
see much scrapping, ana hear "a
many sanguine fuses 'moug Boil
shevists and SpartacuFses and
trouble mOugers, crauks and
strikers and other brands OF
Won't Workers. They do not seem
10 know it's over, and that the job
of stacking clover, or any honest
work or choring should call them
now, instead OF warning. Some
men are built on pattern queer
some. They rant that war is wrong
and fearsome, vet when they see
the dove alighting, they scare IL of
and keep on fighting. So many
minds OF sense Invested. so many
belfrys bat-infested.
GLEN BRADSHAW.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1919-03-08
Long Bones and Short FOLKS.

When we sit down we are all
pretty much the same height. Stat
ure varies with the length of the
| long bones, chiefly the length OF
the femur or thigh bone and the
tibia and fibula or leg bones. Thus
the gents clothier can buy all his
pants for siX-foot men and merely
shear off from two to twelve inch
es from the lower ends to make the
suits fit all other sizes of men like
the paper never hung on the wall.
You are tall or short according to
the length of your thighs and legs.
If the thymus gland, one of the
ductless glands, which lies back of
the breatbone, is removed from a
young animal, the skin soon be-
comes spongy and soft, the erup-
ton of the teeth is greatly delayed,
and the bones become soft and fail
to grow much in length. The basis
of this defective bone growth is a
lime deficit. If a bone is broken
there is little or no callus building
as in a normal animal, and even
the unbroken bone is soft and cas-
lily bent, as in a bone from which
the lime Calcium has been large
is removed by soaking in acid. This
calcium deficit occurs, no matter
how liberal the animals diet may
be in lime-containing foods. There
is evidently some functional factor
destroyed or impaired by removing
this little ductless gland. That
factor is the physiological control
Of calcium Oime) assimilation
In the Boston Medical and Sur
gical Journal for Aug 10, 1908, Dr
Z. W. Wilcox reported the case of
stunted boy IA years of age who
increased nine and one-half inches
in height in three years, apparent
ly as a result of persistent and
carefully regulated ductless gland
hormone medication.
Another of the ductless glands,
the pituitary gland which lies at
the base of the brain, is known to
have a direct influence on growth.
Indeed, enlargement and over
activity OF this gland in a function
al way seems to be the cause OF
giantism and the condition called
acromegaly, a condition in which
the hands and feet, ears and chin
enlarge out OF proportion and the
voice becomes low-pitched and
hoarse from enlargement and
thickening of the structures of the
larnyx.
In the New York Medical Jour
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1919-03-08

Camp Sherman, Ohio. - 1.-THE
criticism directed against the army
Y. NJ c. A. is unfair, unjust and
unwarranted," declared Major
General Edwin F. Glenn, command
er of the Eighty-third division,
Ohio and Pennsylvania troops VINO
gave such a sterling account of
themselves in France. General
Glenn was addressing the conclud-
ing session of a four-day CONFER
ence of business and professional
men held at Camp Sherman to
consider problems concerning the
returning soldier. The convention.
held in the heart of the camp at tie
community church, was conducted
under the auspices of the Red
Triangle organization Educators,
clergy, industrial leaders and men
prominent in various lines Of en-
deavor throughout Ohio, attended
the meetings which sought to map
out a comprehensive program rela-
tive to the soldiery return to civil
ian life.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1919-03-08

The peace conference has wisely put up
the bars against the submarine as an imple-
ment of war and also proposes to outlaw long
range cannon. There is general agreement
that, no weapon should be employed which
cannot be accurately controlled so as to avoid
indiscriminate slaughter and destruction OF
property. This is more than international
law has demanded heretofore The important
thing is to provide means Of enforcement
which there never has been and which can
only come through a well organized league of
nations.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1919-03-08
THE DUPLEX HOUSE.
By Jessie E. Sherwin.

When Richard Dale went to the
city to get plans for some houses
he intended to build on his vacant
property in Whedon, his fancy was
caught by the architects idea of a
twin structure. quite popular with
people who wished to live in a part
of the same and rent the balance.
The duplex" house was simply
one edifice> comprising two equal
halves Joined together with separ-
ate entrances Each section had six
rooms and a thin wall separated
them
Richard Dale's health broke
down. The physicians recommend
ed California as a permanent home.
He sold off most of his realty hold
ings. The last one of the twin
houses was left in his hands. At
the final moment of his departure
a whimsical idea took possession
OF him. Forthwith he repaired to
The office of his attorney.
Parsons" he said, you know
my cousin, John Briggs?"
'-Oh, yes. He was in here yester-
day paying his monthly mainte-
nance installment to his wife.
She'K be in to get it today. There
she is now"
Il think I would like to have
few words with her" said Mr.. Dale.
and as brisk, nervous, worried
looking woman entered the room he
greeted her with courtesy, almost
friendly Wcrmth.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1919-03-08
QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS.
Citrus FrHiLs and Cont.

Would il be uuWise for one cub
!ect To recurring attacks Of govt IN
one foot to indulge a fondness for
the citrus fruits? ] love oranges,
lemons and grapefruit, but I do no.
want to eat anything that is likely
to aggrayate the govt s. =.
Answer-The citrus fruits con-
tain citric acid, which Is oSidizod
in the body to alkaline carbonaLeii
which tend to diminish the acidity'
of the urine Care often prascribedl
for this purpose) and 10 Increase
the alkaIinity of the blood. I cam
imagine no reason why you should
not eat such foods. in fact. being
diuretic, Giaphoreuc and LAXATIVE
they should be helpful.
Fumes from Kerosene HeEGST-
Kindly inform me whether tho'
fumes or gases from a Kerosene
heater In a room are harmful.
L. y. -
Answer Such a heater produces'
large amount of carbon oxide
gas, which is the same gas that is
given of by the lungs of animals
or men u is just as necessary to
carry away the products Of com
bustiOn through tlue or pipe TO the
outside as il would be with any
other fuci-burninR heater. The in
c!dents of odor or smoke arc IN
important.
Some Barber Shop Lore.
I am troubled with boils on my
neck, or rather sore Jumps that
usually do not come 10 a head. The
barber feIlg me they are caused hg
wild or ingr0Wing hairs. Motto
YOU recommend yeast in boi!s
Would it help in my case? IT. d
AnsweT-ProbabIy not The les.
ions are due to an uncIeanly hanSr
ling and TO friction by the collar
The barber and his "ingrowing" or
wild" hair theory are two things
you should carefully avoid. Hairs
never go wild or grow in-outside
Of second-rate barber shops,
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1919-03-08

Rock Island county's liability in the pay
ment of claims of contractors employed on
the new Jail not definitely established,
opinions of interested attorneys to the con-
trary Notwithstanding The county board
probably went beyond its authority authorizing
construction in defiance of court order. Ger
tainly it showed i'll considered haste and want
of judgment. It is shame to expend public
funds with so little to show for them.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1919-03-08
Household Hints

with a wooden potato masher and
boil three minutes; mash through a
strainer, then add the sugar and
raisins. which have been washed,
dried and put through a food chop
per; return to fire and boil slowly
thirty minutes, stirring quite often
This makes an excellent spread for
bread.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1919-03-08

Paris does not know where in the world
it is going to find suitable quarters for Presi-
dent Wilson. Is it possible that failure Of con-
gress to pass the peace conference expense
appropriation has awakened doubts in the
minds of the Parisians that the board bill will
be paid?
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1919-03-08

London physicians have formed union and
uow it is said the dukes of Great Britain are
organizing along similar lines for their own
protection. England continues to lead the
movement for perfect cooperation of all the
individuals engaged in given trade, occupa-
ton or business, and seems to be making
considerable progress toward the goal
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1919-03-08

The king OF Denmark has seen the light
He refuses to appoint a new cabinet till its
members are endorsed by the popular as
sembIy. Like Davy Crockett's coon the re-
naming rulers Of earth are coming down with
out waiting to be shot at.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1919-03-08
EITEATITI TALKS
BY WILLIAM BRADY ND.

nal of Medicine for September, 1913,
Dr.. Browning reports favorable re-
suits from persistent administra-
ton of a pituitary hormone to ply
sfcaIIy backward boys and girls
mot dwarfs). One boy aged -
gained two inches in stature and lO
pounds in weight in eight months
in another 10 months he made a.
further gain OF three inches IN
stature and II pounds in weight.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1919-03-08

Little Woodrow Wilson Sayre his Swishe
Little Woodrow Wilson the newest gandid the
daughter Phia
delpha fellows grandfather paid
Tuesday when he made special at Philadelphia enreue
New York where he delivered nations
sailing photograph shows
baby Woodrow which
to occupies.