The Chattanooga news. [volume] (Chattanooga, Tenn.) 1891-1939, 1919-07-15

One of the curious reactions OF
matrimony seems to be that. In the
great majority Of cases. 1t dulls the
brightness 0nd withers the charm OF
those who enter into II. Some fine
and illusivet quality OF mind and
spirit, some airy fairy grace OF soul
appears to be crushed out by do
mesticity so that you rarely find a
man and a woman who are as at
tractive after marriage as they were
before.
This is true even OF those who are
happily married and who have no
black disappointment to warp their
outlook on life. or kill their aspira-
lions. Except In the solid. plodding,
work a. day virtues, after marriage
the great majority Of people stand
still, or IL they progress. they prog
ress backward, as an Irishman might
say.
Before marriage John was an ON
niverous reader and nothing was
more interesting than to get him
talking about new books and authors.
Meet him five years after marriage.
and he will tell You that he doesn't
keep UP with current literature; that
he only has time for the newspapers
and the stock market. Or perhaps
John was a marvellous raconteur who
could tell a story or do a bit OF pan
tomime as well as any headline
vaudevillian, but few years of
matrimony extinguish Johns sense
of humor and put his little talent
| entirely out of commission!
Before marriage Mary played and
sang almost like a professional.
| Thousands of dollars and years OF
time had been spent on her musical
education. Ten years after marriage
Mary can't play the, Maiden's Prayer,
| and when you ask for a little music,
she says: "Why, haven't touched
| the piano In years, and don't be-
lieve / have sung anything but lul-
| labies since my first baby was born"
When you exclaim In horror at her
having let her talent rust out. she
says apologetically that John doesn't
care for music. When you ask John
why he doesn't read as he used to.
he says that Mary isn't interested in
books and likes to play cards of an
evening, or that he has given up tell
ing stories because Mary thought he
made a buffoon Of himself.
Neither husband nor wife intended
| to block the others development
but they did lit just as effectually by
their indifference as they could have
done by a malicious plan. For the
finer flowers of life must have the
warm sun Of appreciation shine upon
them IL they are to grow and flourish
and this congenial temperature they
seldom find at home.
OF course, II we brought any In
telligence to bear--which we do not
upon the great problem OF how to
be happy though married, husbands
and wives would not be guilty of the
crime of hindering each others de-
velopment in any line. They would
perceive the importance of introduce
ing new interests new enthusiams
new sympathies into their lives to
take the place of the old ones Of
which time Is bound to rob them.
That would make a woman encour.
age her husband to develop every pos.
sible power of mind and body. to use
his talents, to study, to learn, to grow
instead of sinking into mere money
| making machine or an automaton thai
works on a shuttle between home ant
office, and has no knowledge or interest
outside of the shop
1t would make the man encourage his
wife to keep up her little accomplish
ments, to practice her music to keer
UP her painting and drawing, to pursue
whatever studies she had taken up be
fore marriage. even to go in for clubs
and movements If she has executive
ability, or to become a champion tennis
or golf player If she has athletic ten
denotes.
He would help her develop whatever
facility she had into a faculty instead
Of letting her degenerate into iabby
peevish, aimless creature whose whole
horizon is bound by her own home anc
bargain sale.
Nothing would do more to eliminate
the dullpess of married life than fol