The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1919-08-07

fried chicken and hoecake, we have re.
garded love as one Of the best cures
for all ailments men are subject to.
"Oh, well, il the prices Of everything
was what they were four years ago
and was getting my present salary"
remarked wage Garner, would have
to wear two pairs Of suspenders to
keep my money from pulling my over
alls off"
While some Scottish regiments were
disembarking in France. sofae French
officers we're watching them. )nc OBJ
served. "They can't be women, FOR
they have mustaches; but they can't
be men, for they wear skirts ~ have
it, said another. They're that fam
Gus Middlesex regiment from London"
man has had two cars for a couple
of years, and after the experiment fav-
ors the smaller car for this reason:
When he takes the big car to the gar
age the mechanic charges him 81 an
hour. When the garage man fixes the
little car and he asks him how much,
the garage man usually says: saw,
that's all right"
In giving testimony in his million
dollar suit against the Chicago Tri- |
bune Henry Ford said he didn't know
the meaning Of "esoteric." That's all
right, Henry. Very few people do, and
it doesn't mean anything important to
who is worth three pinches of
salt. Drop "esoteric" from the Ian
guage and the only result is to simpli-
fly it, by so much.
The train was pulling into the sta
ton, and as the passengers crowded
10 get off, the hotelman walked up and
down calling: "King George, sir?
King George?" Coming up to an old
gentleman from the country he said,
while STOPPING for the mans bag.
king George, sir?" "No, sir" re-
piled the old man. you're mistaken.
Pm just plain Abraham Mccarthy"
Bill and 'Enry had not met for some
lime, when they quite Unexpectedly |
,ame across each other in the street.
Noticing that his chum was looking
iowncast, Bill clapped him on the back
md said: "Hallo, 'Enry; how are yer
settin' ONT" Still working for the
'ame people" eyes," was 'Enry's
lad reply. "Wife, mother-in-Iaw and
EN- kids"
Smith got married. The evening of
lis first payday he gave his bride
'39 Of his salary and kept only dol
ar for himself But the second pay
ay he gave his wife 81 and kept 500
or himself. "Why John" she cried,
n injured tones, chow on earth do you
hink l can manage for whole week
n paltry dollar?" "Darned if
now. had rotten time myself last
,eek. It's your turn now"
. q q
Two Scots were on journey on a
OF summer day. "Hae we got any
bod wi we, McNab?" asked one. "Ou,
v, bottle o. beer. What hae you
IcAllister % "Dried tongue "Guid!
hen we'll gaze halves wi orr proves
MS The beer was duly divided and
runk McNab wiped his whiskers:
Moo for yer dry tongue, McAllisterp
Mon," said McAllister, cts no dry
Dol"
Strolling along the quays of New
ork harbor an Irishman came across
le wooden barricade which is placed
,und the Enclosure where emigrants
lspected of suffering from contag-
us diseases are isolated. "Phwat's
lis boarding for?" he inquired Of
ISLANDER. "Oh," was the reply,
hats to keep out fever and things
&c that, you know" "lndadel" said
at. solve often heard of the board
health, but bejabers, It's tie first
me Olive seen it."
Q q q
Colonel Roosevelt never wearied Of
Hing the story Of I.ittledale, a story
illustration of resourcefulness and
uck He would begin: During
ME amateur thestricals in my early
'uth, Littledale. one of the perform
$, had to leap into river in order
escape from some wild beasts. The -
age was so arranged that the river
as invisible, but Littledale was to =