The Hartford herald. [volume] (Hartford, Ky.) 1875-1926, 1919-11-12
tbs JINx AT WORK
Traveller Felt II When He Saw
(, Those Whiskers.
De- That Didn't Prevent Him "FaII.
ing" for Probably the Oldest "suek.
o." Game In Existence, and
Then Kicking

Mice dayi" said the stout man as he
lowered himself on the seat beside me
N the day car with a parlor-car look.
Nice" I remarked Just to humor
him, although must say that I always
syy to avoid a man who wears whisk-
ers This man was wearing a No. 8
face fungus with ear flaps. / thought
nj first of asking him IL he had to take
0ot q license for his face trimmings.
but, after all, felt that he had a kind
face-what I could see of it-behind
che shrubbery, as It were.
Are you q commercial traveller" he
asked, stroking his beard to starboard.
NO." I replied, but once had
fourth cousin who did seven years In
J.ll for another offense. That was the
soIy member of my family who stray
ed from the narrow path of virtue"
Lucky for you!" he snapped out,
pushing his plantation in my face. "It's
q dogs life. Everywhere you go peo-
pie talk about the peace"
~Ahw I interposed, there is peace
an, then? thought saw something
sbout It in the press"
Are you an Americana" he raped
eut, getting nasty.
yes" / said. Are you? Or do you
live in Hoboken, n. j." felt l
would like to have struck a match and
started bush fire around the wooded
portion of his face.
hor
face" he remarked.
''Yes. My tonsorial artist illustrat-
ed me with some funny cuts"
"AhrH he slipped IN. "You should
shave yourself and you would never
have a face like that"
Z should like TO have told him that
his was no oil painting. Especially did
bate his face mats. I detest man
who tries to look venerable by wearing
fnce mats, when underneath he may
have the chin o. u criminal.
do you wear those germ traps on
purpose?" asked curiously.
"'Them's camOufage," he said. Just
To show what people look like when
they don't shave. travel for Raxro's
safefy razors. $3.50 each, and seeing
Sou're a nice sort Of boob ! can do
you one for 50. Here is the last one
I have"
took It. If 1t had been a scythe I
sssuld have had harvest with his
heard.
Then fell TO thinking Of his whlsk-
eSs again. They were the most vile
whiskers ! had ever seen. They stood
oct at all angles from his face. I
ccuidn't make up my mind whether I
SHOULD like him better with or with
cot them. But l was quite prepared
20 get q lawn mower and try.
Seeing you are good business
man." he went on. what about nice
pipe lighter? have really good line
sf rs cents each. Sorry haven't got
one with me, but can send it on. New
er fails, and always lights a pipe or
cigarette. In fact, it Is one of the best
pipe lighters ever invented. Just give
spe % cents and your address and /
will send 1t along"
of course | fell. 7 handed him the
suarter and rot out at the next station.
Some days later IL package arrived
nj my villa. Here was the pipe lighter.
Breathlessly l opened the package,
p%gPr TO see the cOntrivance. II was
Yes, . match. gulped two mouthfuls
of fresh air and threw my cigarette in
the pOrridge.
And that is why, when meet man
with a full set Of face mats, / always
ssy-(Oh no, YOU don't. Not here,
nj any rate.-ElitOr.) Walter Stuart
Marsden in Pennsylvania Grit.