South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1919-03-23

the most Ievel-headed Americans
which goes there without their fam
lilies and business associates, which
III this here League OF Nations had
been fixed up at a peace conference
held somewhere down on Lower
Broadway instead of she Quai a Or
say Abe. the chances is that the
United States senate would of had
whole lot more confidence in II than.
they have at present"
saw" Abe exclaimed This here
League OF Nations could of been
pulled off in Paris or II could of been
pulled off I'm respectable neighbor-
hood like Prospect Park West,
Brooklyn. Mawruss. for all the spare
time il gave the fellers which framed
IL TO indulge in any wild night life.
Take for instance the proposed con-
stitution and bylaws. which was
printed on three pages Of the news
paper the other day. Mawruss. and
anybody which dictated that megil-
lah TO a stenographer would be too
hOarse for weeks afterwards to or
der so much as a plain benedictine.
Also, Mawruss. nobody which didn't
lead a blameless life could have a
brain clear enough TO understand
the thing. let alone composing IT,
which last night I sat up till ?
o'clock this morning reading them
&c articles. Mawruss, and 10 grains
OF asperin hardly touched the head
ache which got from it."
Naturally" Morris said, be
cause when Mr.. Wilson wrote that
constitution. Abe. he figured that
people which is going 10 read il has
got a better education as one year in
night school"
"Sure I know" Abe agreed satiri-
cally, but at the same time every
body amt such a natural born Har-
ward graduate like you are. Nav
russ. and furthermore. Mawruss. it's
a big mistake for Mr.. Wilson to go
ahead on the idea that we are. v
understand. because so far as I re-
member il. the constitution OF the
United States didn't say that this
was a government Of the college
gradgawates by the college gradga-
wates. Y understand: neither did
the Declaration OF Independence
start in by saying: We. the college
gradgawates OF the United States
Mawruss. The consequences is that
most OF us ingeramusses which has
got one vote apiece. even around
last November already. begun to
feel neglected. and you could take
IL from me. Mawruss. If Mr.. Wilson
tries 20 win the confidence OF the
American people with a few more
OF them documents with the twin
six words in them. v understand,
by the time he gets ready 20 run for
president again. Mawruss. the only
people which is going 20 vote for
him would be the Pm. d. and A. NJ.
fellers."
We'll Mawruss" Abe said a few
days after the conversation above
set forth. Il see that Pres't Wilson
got back TO America after a rough
passage"
Was he seasick ." Norris asked.
Not a day" Abe replied.
Then that accounts for it," Nor
ris commented.
u
Or Grayson being an admiral"
Morris replied which a couple Of
years ago when Mr.. Wilson appoint
ed DR.. Grayson 20 be an admiral
over the heads OF a couple OF hun
dred fellers which had been captains
OF ships for years already. a LOT Of
people got awful sore about Il. and
now IL appears that he got the ap-
pointment because he can cure sea
sickness"
Il suppose IL DIT Grayson could
cure locomotive ataNia the president
would OF appointed him director
general OF railroads" Abe remarked
For my part Abe Morris said
IF had a good doctor like DR.
Grayson attending ne. and IL was
necessary 10 appoint him TO some
thing IN order 20 keep him. Abe. T
would appoint him a field marshal