The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1919-03-28

Tommy should have Immediately
drop oed dead.
Turning to the next. he said, "'Cur-
ly.' xor the love - Mike, who Is her"
Curly. with a knowing look. an
swered, "'E runs the Kings Arms
public 'ouse. down Rye lane"
With piteous look, Stewart
glanced my way and jerked my
thumb in the direction of the other
Tommy. who seemed to be bursting
with suppressed eagerness. Stewart.
looking at him, calculated. "Spit 1t
out before you choke"
This fellow, with a superior air,
turned in the direction of the two de-
jected Tommies, and answered, "John
MacGraw. why everybody knows i'm
e was the fellow In the London Scot
fish who clicked 'crucifixion' for
stealing the rum issue at 'Wipers'. e
was lad, not 'arf he weren't"
A kissing noise issued from Stew
arts lips, and he seemed to collapse
like punctured toy balloon. After
few seconds. he Strengthened up and
look Of determination came into his
eyes. Addressing the Tommies. he
exploded you blokes are enough to
make Billy Sunday take to drink. Now,
listen here. and let 1t sink In deep.
John McGraw is the manager of the
New York Giants. He is a baseball
player; get it? A baseball player. A
| guy what manages a baseball team.
And any fellows who can't make good
on his team, or in the bush leagues,
he sends 'em a cricket bat with their
name inscribed on 1t and pays their
passage to England. Get mel"
Several Tommies took exception to
this, and said that they had followed
cricket all their lives, but had never
heard of any American cricketers be-
ing sent over by Mr.. McGraw. At
this I exploded, and Stewart went up
in the air. Standing up and turning
to the bunch under the trees, point
ing his finger in their direction, he
let out:
"Now listen, this is good. I'm go
ing to send down to the ordnance
corps and get a dozen gimlets and
some tunnels. With these gimlets I'm
going to bore holes in your 'nappers,'
and using the funnel I'm going to pour
into those garrets of yours little
brains. Then, after you've acquired
gray matter, I'm going to teach you
the great American game of baseball A;
and then when through teaching you,
I'm going to retire to the Old Soldiers
home as physically and mentally un-
fit, because know the Job will put
me there"
The Tommies did not take excep
ton to his pointed remarks about Their
lack Of brains. They overlooked this
because they were very eager to learr
how to play baseball.
A chorus of, go to hit, Yank, that.
what we want; something new on
} ere In this bloody mess Of mud ans
, Coolies"
, Stewart said that we would have tt
talk the matter over. and beckonini
to me, went in the direction of thu
billet. ! followed. he then outlined
: his scheme.
We were to form two baseball
| classes, Stewart in charge of one,
the other. On the plaster of the billie
: we carefully scratched out baseball
! diamond, ana then called the Tommie:
! in. They sat around like little chill
= dren in school, eagerly intent. Fol
9 two hours we explained the game t.
= them. When we got through they al
8 knew how to play baseball-on paper
] We dismissed them, telling them an
! other class would be held the follow
r ing afternoon. That night, Stewar
D and /, around the stump of candle
went into details for organizing two
/. teams. Everything appeared rosy, ant
t we were highly jubilant. A Tomm,
eased over in our direction and limo
0 Gently asked:
( IT sye, Yank, isn't 1t necessary Il
ave byseballs and clubs? We Gavin
very well ply without EN-"
This was bombshell to us. In ou
eagerness and excitement we had quit,
4 forgotten that bats, balls and glove
=? were necessary. I thought Stewar
t was going to burst. Letting out swell
t I'll be blowed !" which nearly blew tn
candle out, he turned a silly look II
t my direction, and looked just a
e cheap.
At last the Tommies had stumpe,
us, and we could see our reputation
fading into nothing. A dead silenc
reigned for over Ave minutes. Thel
:, Stewart started madly to open his hav
G ersack. l thought he had suddenl
t gone crazy. I reached my hand in tn
o direction OF my bayonet, fearing tina
t he was looking for Mills bomt
}, When he drew his hand out, hangin
to his fist was writing pad. ( let g
e OF my bayonet. Borrowing pencl
e from me <Stewart was always borrow
ing), he started writing. thought pei
q haps he was going to commit suicid
i? and was writing farewell letter home
p and asked him what was up. H
r whispered to me:
8 Emp. we're two bloody fools not t
have thought of this long ago. Al
Oof n, do Go ff, to boy,,o 70, m