The West Virginian. [volume] (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1914-1974, 1919-08-06
THE&DA.IIaY
SHORT STORY
On the Edge of Things.
~ Wit Z. AMEs.
Copyright, 1919, by the Mcclure

edge Of the Inheritance of a fair
chance In lke-and straightway her
mother elected to handicap her with
the name she had since borne, and
then her father failed In business and
died, leaving his daughter to the i'm
pending fate Of double orphanhood
For Mrs. Warner. as might have been
expected of one who would name a
child Florabel, had some time since
developed an interesting Victorian
( case Of tuberculosis. alias "a decline"
which sent her to her grave and
Florabel to an institution for benefit
children.
Then a rich woman who was taking
stock Of orphans with a view to
adoption, had finally decided on Sc
lecting F1orabel when the latter.
bored by an interminable interview,
between visitor and matron, yawned
and exposed to the quick eyes of her
almost foster mother the unusual
fact that she had two rows OF teeth
from the first molars back, Double
rows Of teeth are weirdly uncanny
to some persons Of nervous tempera-
ment Mrs Etherby was rather
nervous. 1t was all off.
Then, when Florabel did have a
good fortune to be taken by tender
hearted woman OF small though suf-
ficient means, 1t was her luck that
that good but sentimental lady should
fall victim to the brilliant campaign
OF gentleman who forgot to mention
until after their marriage, that he
was the widowed father of an active
family OF four. The family he brought
to live with and at the expense of the
late Mrs. Curtis and present Mrs.
Brenn. Brenn spent most OF his time
shooting pool II was short COM
mons all around.
Furthermore, when Florabel. to
whom a high school education had
become as the road to all happiness,
finally obtained the frightened con-
sent OF her overburdened foster moth
er. she failed in her examinations by
failing an even one per cent under
the stipulated average. After that
she almost got place at milliner's,
but was five minutes too late. And
now that she was an usher in the I'm
perial Picture Palace, and head over
heels with the head operator, along
must come this Peters girl, Just at
the very hour. almost, when Ned
Morse was all primed up to the point
Of declared responsiveness, and Just
walk off with Florabel's fellow as
easy as anything. 81 never saw any
thing like it in my life!" walled Flor
abel in the solitude of her tiny room.
Which was quite untrue, since she
had never seen anything greatly diff
ferent.
Florabel was almost eighteen by
this time and had been steering tot
terry old gentlemen and obstinate old
ladies' into flashlighted seats for the
latter part of two years at the Imper-
lal Palace. In the course of those
years she had learned how to dispose
Of the freshies in the briefest possible
time. There we're so many of them,
and SO many times did they make
precisely the same speeches and I'M
dertake precisely the same advances,
that 1t had become matter of sheer
automatism for Florabel to ask II
they'd like to have her call the cop
FOR them to tell the story of their
love to; she never remembered one
Of these incidnts for two minutes.
But one day there came into the
theatre, Just after the opening of the
doors, positively the freshest thing 1
aver saw In all my born days!" as
Florabel described him to the girl on
the next aisle.
The freshest thing was a young
Z man In palm beach suit and straw
hat, whose necktie was screaming
chorus Of color and who bore in one
hand an undisguised suit of overalls
Ind In the other an equally frank tool
kit.
A swell IN morning coat on Fifth
avenue, carrying an ashcan, would
not have been better study in con-
trasts. He was red-haired and short,
and across his face. from above his
right ear to the opposite corner of his
chin, was 4 noticeable scar. He
breeLed past the doorkeeper, whose
protests he regarded not at all, and
made directly for Florabel.
y Hello, sweetheart" he said with
put preliminary Of any sort; "youn
mes going to have dish OF chop or
sumep'n in your relief time-d'you
know It? Surest thing. But where's
the way to the gun position? I'm
from the Jumbo Protector Company,
an I've got to put the mash into one
Of your machine. Tell me where to
go andiwhen you're off"
II amt ever off to smarties like
you mister. What do you think !
am 4 tramp? can feed myself!
Take that door at the end of the right
aisle. and when you get up there. II
wasfyou, wouldn't be SO fresh or
you'll come down through the air
There'sfa grown up man up there
"oh-hoi Thataway? All right,
I chiok, but you'vetgot a date, remem-
twas then, thatfF1orabel, described
the visitor to, the. girl in the next
lisle. She was genuine indignant
at the4yuuth's sunwarranted familiar
fly. hut1such IS the psychological ex-
pertness, LOT theE theatre usher that the
{ girl on Sthe ;nextsaisle said to the girl
on the third aislegwithin three min
ptes thereafter: "Betcha she soes
Wtththmt And she did.
Joseph Jefferson Hines combined
the brazen effrontery of sideshow
barker with the. courage of bearcat
Rndsthe direct efficiencyjo of kick in
he stomach.
susisten. infants, ha ha,a, no.