Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1919-04-10
Thompson Feature s Arvice. 1919, Copyright

erVlce. 1919, Copyright
, bade him to mention the matter to
His Majesty" the Queen went on,
but 1 am afraid it will penetrate
to the all-highest ears by and by,
and then the Princes allowance may
! be cut off altogether"
A Case i'll Point
HAS anybody heard of the pro-
tected English tour of the Meinin-
gens?" asked the Kaiser at lunch
con one afternoon.
Won Egloffstein had heard the
Hereditary Prince say that he and
the Princess intended to accept an
invitation to Windsor Castle.
But the cost" exclaimed, the
Kaiser; 1T will be at least ten
marks ($2.50) head every day they
are absent"
| The very next day, at second
breakfast, the Kaiser's menu card,
on which he had sketched "the fu-
ture south front of the castle with
the surrounding territory" was
| handed around.
II am glad to announce" he said,
that l have perfected my plans for
the improvement of the Schloss.
After abolishing the popular amuse-
ment of looking into the Kaiser's
! "ihtoNoib llC IClCl GU W lIlG ulo-
mantling of the houses opposite the
royal residence, the Schloss Freiheit
-"aftcr routing the sweet plcbs
across the way, L have decided to
erect another barrier between my
self and publicity. AS the sketch
i shows, terraces will be built adjoin-
ing the south front of our palace,
and they will extend far enough to
place within the royal precinct that
~ Of HA
between the Schloss and the great
, fountain. These terraces" added
the Kaiser, will at the same time
| serve to deaden some of the noise
from the incessant traffic"
Throws Away Twenty Millions
will the city be willing to sac
ritice the space?" asked the Prince
of SaXe-Altenburg, who was the
! guest of honor that day.
With my permission, certainly"
! replied the Kaiser.
But the scheme, if pushed to
such length, will involve an outlay
of twenty Millions" warned the
Minister of the royal house, Wcdcll.
Maybe, more or less" The
Kaiser said it with a frown, but i'm
mediately resumed his semi banter
ing tone, and added, lightly: Per
maps Will duInOTlZe L EXCEL
lency to arrange another lottery, or
to take up loan that holds out
large premiums, as they do in Aus
tria and Serbia"
With that he turned to the Coun-
! tess Brockdorff, whom he detests
and ordinarily treats with the Sc
Verest indifference, and, by way of
changing the subject, told her a
rlsque story across the table.
A Fool in Science of Finance
That is the Kaiser all over; it
worries him to think that any of
his relatives should spend ten
marks, and he disposcs of ten or
twenty millions of public moneys
as if they were old bricks or oyster
shells; in fact, the Kaiser has no
notion whatever of the value of
things.
Among the many strange facts in
these revelations, Williams remark
concerning the Meiningens' trip to
England is certainly not the least
astonishing, coming from man
who is almost continuously on the
road-the heir and heiress to a
Duchy, paying a visit of state at
Windsor Castle, covering their COM
bined expenses with a paltry five
dollars a day!"
The surmisal is too ridiculous to
require analysis; but it might be
just as well to state here that the
Prince of Meiningen was a very rich
man, while his wife was certainly
the best-dressed woman at Court.
Besides, on their travels, the prince
ly pair were always attended by n
suite. of some twenty people, all of
whom, the Kaiser thought, could be
provided with transportation and in
cldentals for ten marks per day!
kaiScr'S Lack of Business CAPACITY
The cold, precise truth is that the
man striving for absolute power in
Germany and in the rest of the
world, was as deficient of business
| capacity as of the love of truth, of
decency and humanity. Before and
during the war, he promised the
revenue of the great Indian Princes
to all and sundry who subscribed a
million and more for war loans. And
When that failed to draw money to
his Golfers, he granted subscribers
countships and principalities to be
formed in Australian territories.
The World Impostcr Also Imposed
Upon Himself
We now return to that imperial
lWenty-million project launched
with so much self-satisfied compla-
cency between soup and fish"
William brought forward fresh ar
guments in favor of his grand
scheme.
The municipal council could not
offer any objection to his plans,
no matter what the cost" for he
means to give the terraces over To
his sons as Il playground. Besides
the terraces would offer a formid-
able bulwark against the plans of
anarchists morning, noon and
night.
And as a final trump: eve will
promise to prolong the annual stay
of the Court in Berlin at least one
month or six weeks'-arguments
worthy of the royal imposter, who
raised the mineself-und-G Gott piffle
to the dignity of a cult.
Give up one-half of public
square-the most imposing in town
AS playground for his half
dozen kids" some half-witted. like
Oscar, others with criminal tenden-
cies like Eitel Fritz; again, others
more Clown-princely trash.
Bulwark against anarchistsi"
Well, the eX-Kaiser should paze
upon his castle now! And he would
proions his stay for twenty millions
ana public square. He would in
deed until his bones dropped from
the gibbet erected by his loving sub
jects!
THE greatest foods are also tho
greatest charletans and liars"