Manchester Democrat., 1919-04-30
AUTOMOBILE SCHOOL
WITHOUT EXECUTIVE
EDITOR RANN'S REPUTATION AS
DRIVER SHATTERED. SCHOOL
CLOSES IT'S DOORS.
BAUMGARTNER TO BE SUCCESSOR
Surmounting Array Of Obstacles Caus.
es Auto Fans to Insist that Mr..
Baumgartner Succeed Ram.

Manchester is not overburdened with
establishments commercial, Industrial
educational, or otherwise, and it is
therefore with profound regret that we
are compelled to chronicle the sudden
disintegration of a local institution
in the meteor-like rise and progress of
which our citizens took such pardon
able pride We refer to the famous
Auto Engineering School, conducted by
Mr.. H. L. Ram, the brilliant editor of
The Manchester Press.
Years ago. when the automobile first
began to appear on the streets Of Man
chester, in the days when the little one
lunger of Mr.. Fred H. Munson
started on its wheeling way to car
ry its owner toward those distinguish
ed heights of public honor and trust
which he now so worthily occupies,
when J. A. Strickland sounded the
praises of Delaware County farm lands
through the braying throat of the horn
attached to the little red devil in which
he whisked his prospects over the
country, Mr.. Ram, with that unerring
instinct for detecting the public good
for which he has always been remark
able, discerned the need for an institu-
ton in which would-be drivers Of cars
should be taught the rudiments Of the
art of auto management, before they
proceeded to crack the curb stones
along the streets, NOW down the shade
trees of law-abiding citizens, and en-
danger the life and limb Of innocent
pedestrians. With Caesar-like brevity
of action, Mr.. Ram not only saw, but
he conquered. He organized the insti-
tute with an adequate faculty Of ex-
perts, and sent out his prospectus for
students. He did not deem it neces-
sary to discontinue the publication Of
his weekly illuminator. He employed a
competent foreman and devoted all of
his surplus energy to the advancement
of the Manchester Intitute Of Auto
Engineering, of which he was the
proud progenitor. His efforts met the
reward which genuine merit never
fails to secure. Students flocked in
from far and near, and the fame Of the
Institute spread with the rapidity of
Spanish Influenza.
"But there came a day" which was
to demonstrate once more the hollow
ness of earthly fame. One Of the Cedar
Rapids nabobs had become possessed of
a high-class Marmon car. 1t was the
last word in auto-construction at
least so far as appearances go. But
there seemed to be something wrong
with its internal mechanism. The
parts would not collaborate. Proper
adjustment seemed to be lacking. The
owner, after consulting local experts
in vain decided to submit his machine
for inspection to the renowned authori-
ty at the head Of the famous Man
chester institute.
A few days ago his machine limped
painfully into Manchester and came to
a stand before the doors of the insti-
tute. The moment Mr.. Ram caught
sight of this triumph of auto manu-
facture, in all the undimmed sheen and
glory Of its newneSs, momentary feel
ing of weakness came over him, for
he realized that in comparison with
this scintillating product Of genius his
own famous Cadillac, in which he had
always taken a special pride, and
which he had held up to the public as
the acme of car construction, was but
small pumpkins after all. But he re-
pressed this emotion and proceeded to
inspect the mechanism Of the car. One
look was sufficient. He located the
trouble instantly and proceeded to do
what was needed. He brushed the
teeth of the carburator. rectified the
took three stitches in the
readjusted the sched-
ule of the commutator, relieved the
strain on the injector, equalized the
current of the instigator, rectified the
Of the safety valve, mas
saged the manifold, gave few chiro-
practic punches to the vertebral
column of the magnetic, and ended with
a slightly different tilt to
the loud pedal beneath the dash board.
We dislike to bore the reader with
these technical details, but their emu
is necessary to show what a
real expert can do, and with what un-
erring rapidity and certainty he does
it. 1t was just what the new car need.
ed One touch on the knob of the self
starter and the motor began to purr
like the family cat before the fire.
As its speed was gradually increased,
it's song became low whine like the
plea of the boche when he falls into
the hands of his American captOr. Then
it rose into aroar of power that caused
visions Of sixty miles an hour joy
riding to fit before the eyes of Mr..
Ram. To make sure that everything
was in proper working order, he sug-
gested a little trial trip to the owner.
Two lady passengers were secured, and
in few moments the party went
whizzing up Franklin street at speed
that made other drivers gasp.
Near the cemetery is crossing that
pugnaciously lifts it's back six inches
above the surrounding surface ordin-
arily, and six additional inches the mo-
ment it is touched by vehicle of any
kind. It's purpose is to give the last
earthly jolt to the dead and forcible
reminder to the living of what is COM
iration of the moment, forgot this OBJ