Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1919-01-19

YOU phone inc and I'D have, given you an
He said: go dip seven times in tho
Jordan"
your tin.yps You ' DON. get s me- T in , Ss
nuddy. turbid waters OF that stream. why.
ns. We have. far better streams than this.
why. people living in the far parts OF the
lions and bnthe in our waters. MOI"
., Like many n fool to-day Listen to me!
walton. instead OF getting on his knees and
;haniiing God for giving him a chance to
Urn around and damn God and then damn
inc nr'ae whsn fGr prcn , Gods truth
20 b. saved instead OF being thankful,
he begins to curse.
GOD WANTED TO TAKE POKER
OUT OF SAAMAN'S BACKBONE
Naaman was wroth. Oh! God could have
saved him without the dips. but he wanted
Here's = man an who wants n" TO be- Sseno farmer
What VIII no do? Oh: go hire out to a
Una, man ths! wants, to be jeweler. What
VIII be do? Go hire out to tho railroad
sir. that wants 10 go a doctor. What Will
NJ y, DO 90! On; why; :et him go work for a
II a man wants to be a doctor we say:
on, GO !" a medical school and study. come
fellow to &c, cut up and come in for medi-
Hers some fellow wants to BIO a law.
and study tn. construction OF the law.
what will hc do? Go down to Tinany's.
Here's man wants to be farmer. Put
r". CHRISTIAN what viii h" do? Oh Eo
ask some OF these God -rorsalcn old devils
ask thai od.forsaken. dirty gang. 10 dirty
maj The dev!l would duck UP an alley to
~. he knows Ito has studied no viii
'"!i YOU what to do.
Hcrn's a man falls down and breaks his
IL nc Cali al in the bise 'losTi M Ms
doesn't Know anything about It. So IL you
wnnt H. 70 to somebody that knows
MAN WHO CONDEMNS WHAT HE
HASN'T TRIED Is UNJUST
The man tina, condemns whatever he
=, Finally he listened to The entreatics of
ready s %r hts and sse them nc getting
IAN unon the bank of The river Pretty
soon ,',i his alligator hits him on the shoulder
section of the country"
=, N" ana says: II thought a fellow hi,
And SO can see them out there getting
mr., Feady for The bath. he wasn't used to
didnt have any porcelain bath tubs. pre-
Pared par, Cntirura and Ivory soap. that won't
to scrub your back.
., So they get, him ready. lie starts into
covered with slime and he slips off and
cut. his toe on clam shell and says:
lie walks on; into the water and stick
i,o;I ,'o down hit, him and he jumps; He
Coll m Gold nr-r Br-r. ,nr-riF'
out Of his ears. No. he comes up and
ne begins to examine himself to see how
WHEN GOD SAYS SEVEN
TIMES DO NOT STOP AT SIX
knew 2 fellow that went to church.
SGt under s,ms the power Of the preacher had
think feel little better
..n Irie "a, fellow low out In Illinois He said:
wccts and feel better. / only cussed my
better"
BY and by the muddy sediment begins
they begin to itch and he says: Ooh oo-oo!'
Oh s1: God un sns SIX W%.n notisa
seven don't stop at six for there Is no bless
a good many in the church have Just rot
cn4ugh reliEion to mako them miserable
and an. II YOU have no 10y in, religion. you've
No I've Sometimes a"ahTs tt ,hd SHH 'hf'f
got or. that YOU haven .neid Tor wouid fail
70 Some necr'e Wouldn't have anything
cc,luloid collar and one pair OF hole
family nrayerEnc HAVEN, '9 got re Religion ndSn
,. -,uh 10 s'Hr iyinr-,,o! Haven't GOT re-
hoo:c out Of the Ice box. to ask a blessing
- IN" tahlc--no. not at all
UP TO NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS. IsISGLY
What's the natter They haven't COM
Blsary Gysn ,bs Cod
rood. rich friend who takes hundreds
Of tho moor bows and iris froIaI the city. out
NJ their lives. He viii take out two or
'h-"" hundred bows for counlc ne weeks
vSnr thcv " en- an" eat pa" rh"v don't pxt
',,st So much on Their rlatcs, hnt: thcv SGT
''r, eat I'm h" touches It. Then they go
hH,hc Oh th"v have q. rreat time.
20 they came down the hill. jump!nr On 'hn
s"-in". hoard and down CAME p red hea del
'"kc n shampoo YOU could smell burnt ono
90 Tor two blocks. Hts air was so rod
,-"nt into a bnildfne He came rurn,n-
down th"r" ard HITTING the sn-inr-hoa-d
~-"n. as he took the overland strokes
~" y n!pn:s'"'n AMI he stood shfv"-,r~ q,
~" ode" Of N" wa'c-. mn he would Stick
ssid arc wne's ~ m matt if w, fSd x,,,
~"t ITO the game there. you guy. It's
And ,tcrc this 'itt'c kid stood. sticking
his to" In a"d shvcrlnE. and goose PIN
MOS all over him.
Jrsr EHNUC" rrrTCInN ~ eo,-E
PIN'PIE TO GIVE THEM GOOSE-PJMPLES
That's tn" way. with lot OF people Mt
church ri r ,hev'ye lust got enough religion
religion enough TO get away out into the
fnthomless d~n'hs OF Gods great ocean
nf love. Haven't faith enough to do what
God wants them to do In this world OH
am almost afraid to say something that
might make Some Of them laugh for fear
might be arrested for wanton destruction
Of rare, antique hric-a-brac. NV goodness
,iir". You'd think that IL some peon,e
laughed It would hrnalS their faces To
600 some. ynu would think the essential
Of orthodox Christia nifty Is to have FREQ
- lor~ vom could cat oatmeal out Of the
A Coated Tongue?
What it Means
A bad breath, coated tongue, bad
taste in the month lanonor md dnhilitu