davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1919-03-22
Advice to the Lovelorn
ny BEATRICE FAIRFAX.
The GrnspinE Girl.

Dear Miss Fairfax,--I have been going
about with girl for about four months, /
love her dearly. but am not sure iny love
is returned. tahc her continually TO the
thcatcrs. and she accepts ii matter Of
course. ! am spending more money than |
can afford. have talked with the sir!
about II. but. as said before. she expects
H. IL has gotten me into numerous quar-
TeIs With my parents PLEASE advise M M.
there is any other way OF continuing IL.
Your young lady sounds very grasp
ing and selfish to me: In fact, she re-.
mentioned in the Bible, who cried con
tinuaHy. Give. give ! should have
plain talk with her and tell her tina /
further extravaganza on your part j.;
entirely out of the question. And il
her: You don't want a friend who is
plainly working" YOU for a good time.
She No Longer Writes.
last summer / met a girl and fen deeply
in love with her. and she returned my love.
when W. cane ne back to the city We me,
COULDN'T, see her for a few DAYS would
, wrin &, and she siways answered as soon as
written 70 her nearly every week without
me Is that che often told me how much she
loved me- and now she doesn't seem TO care
to write. ANTHONY.
If You had lost the affection of this
young lady. but girls are so queer.
especially when they are in love, that
little explanation may be worth seek
ing. Write. her dignificd and self
longer friendly with YOU. Perhaps
there Is some little unimportant. thing
that Is keeping You eStranged.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-01-08
A TIME FOR SELF RESTRAINT

OPE who have chafng under the restraints imposed
 by the during the past two too much inclined to violent opposition the restraints imposed by present abnor nal conditions in Birmingham.
 But is above all time for self-restraint The Age Herald beseged by requests make the city commission clean the streets make the railroads their trains me make the street railway company make the merchants deliver goods promptly make the newsbos get out earlier with their and make the coal deliver coal when it is ordered
 conditions in the Violence accompishes good end
 Throwing rocks through street window does not m- prove conditions III temper toward newsboy who has rudged through and ice deliver paper rived hour late does improve his service Roasting city commission because does not remedy evil the city does not aid them in their work
 The spirit of the hungry unemployed boshevk with his lent means of fighting all far different the spirit of those who would right wrongs by methods Men in authority line of business ment today doing everything humany possible remedy existing wrongs and inadequate public service merchant the city, the public service corporationa srug gng against adverse factors weather labor shortage high costs Time will remedy conditions every woman help by cooperating and lending instead ing down and increasing the difficulties of the task
 Brmlng wants of the boshevik spirit may small matter but boshevism dangerous poison Its nJecton into community whether be Russia Germany Birmingham is serious in the highest degree none
 in Birmingham and law abiding to his home city to do his part stop right have won victory over the Huns and the present is good to win victory over our own rebeious sentiments here at home
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-01-08
BOGUS HEROES.

From the Stars and Stripes.
 There have been a lot of bogus he roes in America since the army began dispatching men back to the states for sickness, wounds, training and other reasons Evry soldier who has gone back has been a hero until proved otherwise. and the temptation not to nrove themselves otherwise has been too much for. some.
 There is the case of the air service mechanic who went back with heact trouble. His home town newspaper printed his diary. which recounted several stirring flights over the Ger man lines. all imaginary. The nearest he had been to the front was Issou dun
 There is the case of the sergeant who lectured on the battle of Cantigny for the fourth Liberty Loan (and sold a lot of bonds. top) until he was found to have spent his stay in France, par ring travelling time, at Le Mans.
  how hard it was not to be a hero. Of the major who returned and. merely obeying military regulations, refused to be interviewed. AS far as he had got toward gunfire and danger was a training school at Langres. Modest lv declines to speak of his part in Cha teau Thierry fighting" was second in line of the heading over the story about him, in the next mornings pa ner. The fault was the newspapers. not the majors
 TO date. in the eyes of the people back home, every soldier who has been in Europe has undergone the hor- TOTS of the front. Private Johnnie Jones of the s. o. S.. whose greatest hardship in this war was taps at 9;So was pictured in his home journal and cautioned. John Jones of this city now battling for freedom in the trenches. It is going to be hard to convince the homefolk that of the 100000 Ameri- cans in France. half of them. through no fault of their own. of course, never got under fire.
 we get back with our first hand knowledge of affairs over here. the bo- gus hero is going to have pretty thorny trail.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-01-08
From the New York Sun.

From the New York Sun.
 N RE passenger pigeons returning? A\ F. H. Manrose, vice president of e S the Connecticut state board of fisheries and game, and F. D.. Curtiss of Forestville in the Nutmeg state, both testify that at Graniss Pond, Stoning- ton, they observed last May three passen- ger pigeons perched on dead tree not more than 50 feet away from them. One was a fine specimen of the full fledged cock piogeon, with the markings; an- other was a full grown hen pigeon and the third individual was yearling cock, with slightly mottled breast.
 Both men being members of the For estville Fishing club they urged the other c. w. Wooster on June observed all three birds and w. K. Parker noticed the two old birds seven days later. All the mer are over 60 years old, and in their be yhood days were familiar with the pas senger pigeon.
 The evidence holds out hope In Science of November l, there appears statement that three bird students saw small flock of passenger pigeons between West Galway and Charlton, N. Y. Some or our Great South Bay oystermen and bay men insist that few of these birds may be seen migrating every year along the southern shore of Long Island
 Since the death on September l, 1914, in the Geological Garden at Cincinnati of what was generally believed to be the last surviving passenger pigeon, there have been numerous reports Of the sighting of passenger pigeons, but on investigation the birds have proved to be mourning doves.
 An attempt was made in 1910 to find an undisturbed nest of the passenger pigeons, and although more than s30oo was offered in rewards to the discoverer of one and the offer held good for sev- eral years no award was ever collected. State rewards of 5000 were offered with the same end in view in New York, New Jersey, Massachusetts, Connecti- cut Pennsylvania, Illinois and Mich ,igan, where the passenger pigeon once was prolific, but Childs, Kuser, Bor-
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-01-08
LIKE MLUKE SAYS

Every time a man looks at the ''be- fore" and after taking pictures in the patent medicine almanac they re- mind him of his wife.
 Any man is brave enough to face the music when he rolls home about i1 the morning. What he fears is having to listen to it.
 Another thing man can't unde5- stand is how a woman loves to wash babies and how she hates to wash dishes.
 They say that a wife can make or break home. So can the other enc of the team. Are you a husband oi merely married man?
 A girls hair occupies all of her at tention until she gets her first corset And from then on her shape occupies all her attention.
 The simp spoilers are not all em- ployed on the highbrow magazines Some of them are employed as sign writers in stores.
 The fashioned man who used te get the Sellow janders" now has : son whose smoked fingers look tha way from smoking cigarettes. Now that the inventors have qui devising internal machines with whicf to win the war they might turn theil talents toward a hot-air muffler to bt worn by a man after he has inhaled hi: fifth drink.
 A five-foot girl doesn't look like sh' is showing much when her skirts ar. knee high. But when six-foot sir wears knee-high skirts she looks lSf' she is almost naked. And what has become of the old fashioned boy who used to have wart' all over his hands? A woman often goes shopping ant forgets to take any money with her But she never goes shopping and for gets to take her pocketbook with her A man can wear whiskers and stil be human being. But there is nt hope for the man who is so fond O his whiskers that he puts perfume ol them.
 The man who spends four hour telling what he is going to do usual, accomplishes as much as the hors who uns his race in the paddock be
 fore he goes to the post.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-01-08
COULDN'T FOOL HIM TWICE.

From the Cincinnati Enquirer.
 > A green clerk was employed in seed store and joker went in and asked him for some sweet potato seed. The clerk hunted all over the place and announced that they were just out. Later on the boss told him that he shuold be careful and not let smart Alecks play jokes on him. little later a lady came in and asked for some bird seed. "Aw, go on, grinned the clerk. You can't fool me Birds is matched from eggs'
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-01-08
CONCRETE DoMEs.

'Why did you pause in the middle of your speech-to let your words sink in?'
 No" replied the disgusted orator "IFwas out of breath. With crowd like that I'd have to crack their era niums first.v
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-01-08
Preparing for New
 Savings Campaign

TN the 1919 War Savings Stamp jU campaign, to begin on the seven- teenth of January, the thrift idea will be stressed. In many states last years organization will be maintained and strengthened, and where there was lack of organization, cooperation and earnest and sustained team work must be the rule.
 Only by nationwide concerted ef- ! fort can a 100 per cent achievement be expected. And as the amount sought is two billion dollars, nothing less than an intensive drive will be worth considering.
 Arthur c. Crowder, who succeeds Crawford Johnson as state director of Alabama's War Savings canvass, is a man of uncommon energy and valuable experience in philosophical leadership. He can be counted upon to leave no stone unturned to make the campaign a signal success.
 MT. Johnson was model manager. His was heavy task, because he had to develop an organization from un- tried volunteers. But with the aid of men and women eager to serve their country and help win the war, the state director accomplished wonders.
 Few patriots made greater personal sacrifices than MT. Johnson. He gave up, to a large extent, his own busi- ness in order to further vital cause. MT. Crowder will find his work strenu- ous. but after all it will be compara- lively easy, if he has the support of the splendid organization that his predecessor built up.
 Alabama should have spirited thrift drive from the start. Every school district in every county in Ala lbama should continue to be strong thrift center. If it be so this state will go well over the top. l x * *
 One of the former Kaiser's sons has gone into the automobile business. It is feared that Frederick William has been Crown Princing so long that he'll never be able to go to work
 E j. #
 A contemporary discusses the psy' chological effects of flying. Might as we'll postpone that until We are reason- ably sure that the fool-proof airplana has arrived
 While it is possible for soldier to dance with an artificial leg, he would be foolish to essay the Argentine tango.
 Berlin. where riots are of daily oc- currence. used to have the most auto- cratic police force in the world.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-01-08

world simply because he lived there. The simple funeral services which will be performed in the primitive church which Colonel Roosevelt and his family attended, will be more inn pressive than the blare of bands and la stately procession of notables as- sembled to do him honor. They will be in keeping with those ideals of democratic simplicity and lack of os- tentation dear to the American peo- pie. Whatever his critics-.may have said of him in the heat of political tstrife, Colonel Roosevelt was the most democratic of men and typified in his person many of our national traits which form the basis of Amerlcan
 character.
 Now that its most distinguished
 citizen is dead, after a little while Oyster Bay will cease to figure in the date lines, but it will always hold an interest for the American people, since it will be the resting place of a
 man who left his impress on the his- tory of this country and built himself a monument in enduring works.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-01-08
"ALIIESo

From the Stars and Stripes.
 Ausses there are by the score in Lon don, with their distinctive fedoras and their regulations of being the highest paid fighters on any front, past or present.
 An American was sitting on the top deck of a motor omnibus when an Aus sic climbed up and sat down beside him.
 "Ay, Yank.''
 'Ah, there, Aussie." @tlt aA
 Well heeled, Yank?" ~
 Now even though several million men have been fighting together and risking their lives for each other and all that, still there are limits, especially when a perfect stranger breaches another per feet stranger on the subject of loan. At least, it looked like a bid for loan. So the Tank, not wanting to seem in- hospitable, framed little white lie.
 Well, I don't kpow. You see, we haven't been paid yet.'
 Fine" said the Australian. linen let me pay your fare"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-01-08
THE PASSENGER PIGEON

roughs, Kinney, Avis, Mershon, Thayer Grinnel and Hodge and others inter ested in the passenger pigeon, had their checks returned to them.
 Civilized man was the exterminator of the bird. Millions of the birds were brought down by systematic slaughter for the market and the pot by the shot guns, clubs and nets of the earliest American pothunters. How could a bird, even though it's numbers once darkened the skies, stand such slaugh- ter as was involved in a daily ship ment of three carloads for 40 days? The town of Hartford, Mich, did that in 1869. The total was estimated at 1,SS0,000 birds. In two years an- other Michigan town marketed 15,s4o.- 900 birds
 In 1S4S Massachusetts gravely passed law protecting the netters of wild pig cons There was fine of sl0 for dam aging nets or frightening pigeons away from them. Pigeon slaughter was a 'le- gitimate industry. In 1867 New York came to the conclusion that the wild
 
 ling year saw it's last great nesting, the last roasting being in 1875. Michigan gave the birds protection in 1869 and Pennsyl- vania not until 1S7S Massachusetts in 1870 gave protection to the birds that once were sold for 12 cents dozen The millions of passenger pigeons were so suddenly exter1ninated that it was hard to believe that they were extinct Assertions were numerous that the birds that formerly ranged from the Atlantic coast westward to the Rocky mountains had taken refuge in SouthpAmerica or in Mexico" Alexander Wilson, the pio- neer American ornithologist, once esti- mated the number of passenger pigeons at 2,2So, ,272,oo0 no wonder wasteful Amer jeans regarded them as food for hogs.
 That the bird Regarded as extinct has been seen again will make observers par ticularly watchful during the nesting time of 1919 Perhaps the American Or nithologists union will come forward again with an offer of rewards in the hope of finding nesting pair or colony of these birds.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-01-08
Crowd shows It's Curiosity

Tt is an old saying that folks are mighty curious said Russell Hunt, and Monday afternoon we had an example of it at the corner of Second avenue and Twentieth street on the old Norton cor ner.
 Tt seems that the snow had melted in the gutter but was deceptive in ap- pearance, for those who put their weight on it had the unpleasant sensation of begging down in slush ankle deep. Quite a crowd gathered to see who would be the next victim. Along would come a dignified matron, and in she would go and glare at the bystanders who snig- gled Then a tripping miss would plunge in and gasp for breath; but the crowd got the most fun out of the 'Johnnies who got their spats splattered. Finally some fellow with a heart put an old carpenters horse up as an obstruction and the rubber necks' sneaked away.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-01-08
THE OLD SONG

By Charles Kingsley. Whsn all the world is young. lad,
 And allNthe trees are green: And every goose a swan. lad,
 And every lass a queen; Then hey for boot and horse, lad,
 A ARa round the world away; Young blood must have it's course, lad
 And every dog his day. When all the world is old, lad
 And all the trees are brown: And all the sport is stale, lad,
 And all the wheels run down.: Creep home and take your place tlrcf.
 The spent and maimedy among; God grant you find one face there
 You loved wheFali was young.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-01-08
TUB FOR WILHELM.
'm the Chicago News.

From the Chicago News.
 Wilhelm Hohenzollern might emu late Diogenes to the extent of procuf.t ing a tub to live in and placing it in the much desired place in the sum- But. of course. Alexanders\ to insult are going to be scarce. Still thers will be presidents to snarl at. tub for MT. HohenZollern.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-01-08
WAR AND DESCRIPTIVE WRITING

WAR AND DESCRIPTIVE WRITING. From the London Daily News.
 The war has not left the really live descriptive writer without opportuni- ties. What may still be done is vividly illustrated in the following excerpt from an account of the Kings progress through Paris:
 Even the drainpipes of houses had hardy adventurers clinging apparently by the eyebrows to acclaim with both hands the head of the allied state.-
 How the eyes of the hardy strap hanger clinging by his trouser buttons to the oscillating edge of the carriage window must have bulged when he read that.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-01-08
THE LONE EXCEPTION,
n the Arkansas Gazette.

From the Arkansas Gazette.
 The only man who does well by him self when he pulls bone is the paleont- oiogist who reaches down in the earth and draws forth the osseous part of the left hind leg of an ichthyosaurus.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-01-08
4 MEETING OF OLD MEN.

From the Montgomery Advertiser.
 This may be a young mans age, put nevertheless young men will not fix the destiny of the world for the next hundred years. Old men have been called to per- form that tremendous task. Here are the ages of the men who will control the peace conference:
 Wilson is 62 ga#Bs
 Clemenceau is TF1
 Lloyd George is 56,
 Balfour is 70,
 Lord Reading is 5S.
 The bright young man, just out or college, will be conspicuous by his ap- sence from the counsels at Versailles
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-01-08
ABSOLUTE ZERO.

From the Des Moines Tribune. Marching into Metz without struS' gle must have been about as thrilling to our mettlesome doughboys as kiss
 ing ones own wife under the mlstie-
 tOa
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-01-08
FORGED cURTAILMENT.

Have you resolved to drink less during 1s19?"
 Yes" replied Mir. Jagsby. That does you credit"
 q deserve no credit The visible supply is diminishing. sir"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-01-08
A GIFT.

Of course you got a Christmas book,
 Dispatching thanks with proper speed;
 The kind at which you sadly look
 And which you'll never, never read.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-01-08
DEALING WITH AN AUTocRAr.

DEALING WITH AN AUTOCRAT.
 I'm surprised that man of your standing in the community could be almost servile in a telephone conver- sation. Where's your dignity and self respectT'
 You don't know who l was talking to-" answ cred Mir. Dubwaite. T was trying to persuade my coal dealer to sell me ton of coal"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-01-08
HE WON'T GET IN.

HE WON'T T OET IN. The man who hoar1s his worldly pelf Some day will need no heater; His good opinion of himself Will never fool St, Peter,
 Luke McLuke Though of f~his goodness every day He always may be prating. It's possible St. Peter may Give him a different rating.
 Newark Advocate. Although he's certain that some day He'll wear a golden crown, He's apt to hear. St. Peter say: stand back. there! Going down!~
 Paul Cook. s
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-01-08

Washington, bureau, POT bieos ouii0 ing.
 European bureau, Henrietta seiss'' Covent Garden, London.
 Eastern business office. W building, New York city; western posi- ness office. Tribune building, Chicago The $ (. Beckwlth Special ASeh~!' agents for foreign advertising.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-01-08
To Americans in France
Monuments Raised

!
 7TYIE first American soldiers to fall in battle on French soil have been honored by a monument erected by the French people of Lorraine as near to the spot where they fell>as it was then safe for noncombatants to go. The shaft stands at the little vil- lage of Bathelemont, in the French department of Meurthe and Moselle. The three men whose names are in scribed on the monument were Cor poral James R. Gresham, Private Thomas F. Enright and Private Merle D. Hay, members of F company, Six teenth infantry regiment, First divi- sion. They were killed in the first clash between German and American troops in the trench raid of Novem- Der 2-3, 1917, near the village of Ar racourt-
 The battle front was not far from Bathelemont when the monument was erected with funds contributed by thousands of Lorraine townspeoplc and farmers, in gratitude for Amer ica's help in the war. The shaft may eventually be moved to the exact spot where the American heroes fought for France and civilization.
 A picture of the monument was pub lished in a recent issue of the New York Evening Sun. It is simple shaft, bearing the double cross and holly leaves of Lorraine and the in- scription, "France-Etas Unis-1917 La Lorraine aux Etas Unis," with three stars at the base. On the re- verse side are engraved the names of the American soldiers, with the words, HAs worthy sons of their great and noble nation, they fought for justice, for liberty, for civilization against German imperialism, scourge of man. kind. They died on the field of honor
 In years to come other monuments xr;Il ho ovocfod ir Franco fo conmem. crate American heroes and the part they played in the war, but none will have greater interest for visitors from America than the simple shaft ir Lorraine.
 Oyster Bay Loses
 Its Foremost Citizen
 "0YsTER BAY mourns the
 W death of Colonel Rooseevlt.'
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-01-08
ADRIFvT WITH THE TIMES
THE MOTOR SAMARITAN.

THE MOTOR SAMARITAN. man who's worthy your applause Is Nichodemus Green; We like 10 give him praise because He's very rarely seen To pass a poor pedestrian by Who's waiting for car He halls him with a kindly eye And says, Jump in. How far?'' Abou- -ben-Adhem won great fame, Who loved his fellow man, And Nicodemus is the same,
 For tell me. if. you can, What favor wins more gratitude Upon a frosty day When snow and ice impede and you'd Be speeding on your way, Than such a kindly, thoughtful deed That's far too seldom seen? That's why we wrote this little screed To Nicodemus Green.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-01-08
CuIIman Man Ha, Fire.

T was birding myself on the fact that I was snugly fixed up in my modern furnace heated bungalow" said Dwight Fuller of Cullman, who was in the city on business yesterday, but something went wrong and fire was started in one of the upstairs rooms which re- suited in the burning off of the roof, and for the time being I am out of house and home. A fire at any time is a bad thing for family but in such weather as we have had it is serious