Putnam patriot., 1919-06-13
SALESMAN SLICK AS
GREASE HE SOLD
Bought Ii For IL Cents the Jar
At S and 10 and Peddled
Ii For $1.50


Slick as the grease he sold. Per-
haps little bit slcker, for it was
by no means a high standard article,
an unknown with ability to conduct
school of craftsmanship, honswog
gled few of the heads twhen their
husbands are away of our best fam
lilies over on the east side during the
the beautiful sunshiny day, Thurs
day.
Cold cream with exceptional pro-
clivities as beautifier. Made by the
seventh daughter of a seventh son, of
perpetual rose leaves and cherries
that would bring the bloom of the fa-
vorite wedding flower to the cheeks,
and the dark colorings of the summer
time fruit to the lips. all for the sum
of a dollar and half-and less if
one was not willing to pay this small
price.
Sales were made of course. Ladies
| would buy magic beauty mud if a
slick salesman with some good looks
put it up at auction, especially if it
| was offered at dollar forty-nine,
worth dollar fifty; such bargain
| would cause small riot On, yes,
the beautifier salesman sold goods un-
til some woman undid one of the
| packages and, finding no mystic hi
eroglyphics on the bottle felt that
the seventh daughter of a seventh son
of perpetual roseleayes and cherries
had no hand in making that beauty
cream. Her immediate thought was
Of a humble bee--stung. Police, po-
lice. was the lady's cry. That is the
| way they cry when stung, but not
when they want a new bonnet, oh no,
then it is real sat tears that makes
the cold cream necessary. The po-
lice responded. 1t went to the wo-
mans house fifty-ffty, which is to
saw half of the day force responded.
The captain went to investigate.
In the final chapter the captain is
still investigating. He was actively
investigating, .but, IL rs now past
tense. for he Wound that the good
! looking smart little salesman was ped
ding brand of war paint or cold
/ cream that had been purchased at the
five and ten, so called because most
articles cost five or ten cents, but
this cream cost the agent eleven cents
| either because he belonged to the
BuffaIoes. or the cream was consid-
cred a luxury by the U. S. Govern
ment, and taxed, as it was considered
a luxury by the Grove street section
ladies who paid tax, or perhaps he
paid eleven cents for it because that
was the price charged. But what's
the difference what the reason was
| This cold cream cost this smart guy
salesman eleven copper pieces at re-
tail and he sold it for one good simo-
leon and a half of another, which in
fractional currency, as they say in
Wall street, when speaking of thou
sand dollar bills, is just $50 red In
dian heads, which is the smallest coin
of the realm.
Now from II cents to $50 cents in
such a short time is going some. This
smooth slick-her-up salesman was GER
tainly breaking the speed limits and
if the captain had caught up to him
he, the salesman, would certainly
have been arrested and the captain
would have had his hands full keep
ing back the irate ladies who would
have doubtless tried to scratch his,
no. no, not the captains, the sales
mans eyes out. But he hasn't been
caught yet. If he is there will be ma
terial for another story. Don't you
hope he is? Yes? No?
The real true story of the transac-
ton is that this man went to a home
ON Bradley street, where he induced
a woman to become massage artist,
saving that there were many ladies'
that do not like to go to a place In the
business section. He was to send an
other lady to show the prospect how
to massage. Then he was to put the
cream in a local drug store. Every
lady that purchased jar got cou-
pon and for that coupon got a mas
sage from Bradley street. The
massage artist was to be paid " a
week for four hours a day She had
to buy one jar of cream for $i.oo,
which she did, and then woke up.
f M. Wheaton and Wallace Good
IL 4 70,