The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-01-31
MEN, WOMEN
 AND THINGS


 have written morei have heard 1t talked about from time to time among my friends; have listened to the experts on 1t, but somehow it never seemed to interest me personally
 
 | I looked on 1t as a dreaded disease which was disorganizing business, de- stroylng the morale of camps. endanger- ing the lives of the fighting men, and stealing into our homes and robbing them of some of our brightest and best be- loved.
 From the very start I was constantly exposed to it-on the trains, in taxis. in 1 hotels. in stores, in churches, speaking in theatres and moving picture places, in offices, on the crowded street cars, or elevators, on the streets-just every where, and thinking myself immune.
 Then without rhyme or reason l went on a trip, and woke up with long, dark taste, without having created it the night before, and a dull headache. and dis arranged stomach, watery eyes, fitful sneezing, and that tired feeling which is so extensively advertised, with little cold chills running up and down my back, and my temperature rising.
 i sss
 I knew I ought to have turned around and headed for home, but 1 kept going, believing that I could wear 1t out, and fearing to give up I kept at it for nearly
 ,,rIa and had sense enough to go by and see Dr. Heacock, who happened to be out. I, however, was lucky and got him on the phone when he telephoned in to his office.
 I said over the wires. Doc, can fel- low have malaria in the winter timer He replied that such a thing was pos sible, why? To which I gave feeble re- ply that then I've got it." It was the only thing I ever had had which had made me feel so miserable, and thinking that I was not "flu' suspect, l just became resigned to a long course of ma lara treatment.
 In a little while he came in and be- gan to quiz me. He did not first put me through the usual medical cross-examin- ation, but took me unawares, by asking: Have you any desire to attend lunch con at the Tutwiler?" I said "No." 1 Then he shot at me, How about mak- ing an address?" Quick as flash an- swered, "Not me-" "An right" he calmly went on, "are you eager to write a story" I answered with a shake of my head. The diagnosis was over, for as if thinking aloud he remarked "Well, you are a mighty sick man.
 I have always admired the masterful way in which physicians handle their clients. They know their helplessness and they Just bully them to beat the band. This is why I began first.> ''Doc," said | q have an out-of-town engagement to preach tomorrow, and if you will let me fill the date I'll take anything you give me, and I'll go home and go to bed if you order it'' It never feazed him. For answer he replied, Hold out youl tongue" He evidently found fault with 3 Lit Then he put something around his } forehead and took long view down my windpipe, and almost with ecstatic rap ture exclaimed, "You have perfect flu 3 throat" I thought, yes 1t has been a flue } through which some mighty good drinks ) and delicacies have found their way. , was right proud of it myself. Then he 3 felt my pulse, and worked on my ches' l with some kind of an instrument, and 3 I knew I was goner
 Then he assumed the wise look af focted by all medical men-it's half ia therly and half professionalism said
 Forget your sermon, you are going home and going to bed," and then to add dig . nity and give his command touch O
 fear, he added, ''or I will not be respon :, slble for the consequences" I fell fo i- just like all the balance of the help . less patients. We make fun of th
 medicos until we get sick, then weale them handle us at will.
 d He never took any chances on my fol 9 lowing his directions, but ordered hi y chauffeur to drive me straight home c even forbidding me to get out at Tn q Age-Herald, which I had no intention o o doing, for If had a case of the flu" d was the last bunch in town that I wa
 wishful of giving it to- I wouldn't eve
 have gone by to see Tom Akers, althoJgl
 he wrote me up once in that sarcasti a yeir in Alabama Bound" I did thinl n of going by the Ledger to ask frien Martin what was the best patent medi q cine for the "flu,' but I was afraid h t night shoot me for trying to pull a bur
 joke.
 t My home coming had been advertise = to my wife, and I was met at the doc
 and ushered to my room. in which fir II blazed in thu grate, and was put to bee if and just think of the luxury of it, n ho, water bottle nestled at the foot c l. the bed-and I knew that at last afte
 mcre than two stormy years had passe .s I was going to be able to spend da
 or two in the bosom of my family. a It though I was quarantined. ,e If you have had the flu there is n
 need of my wasting my time to tell yo l. about it, and if you have never had i :. although I am preacher there is al in my tn fa