The Washington herald., 1919-11-24

or course the only solution OF the
mother-in-law problem that really
works is for no mother-in-law and
daughter-in-law to try to live together.
Human nature will have to be made
over. and redeemed and sanctifed. be-
fore the two women who love the
same man supremely can regard each
other without a gnawing jealousy that
eats all the fiercer into their souls be-
cause one has upon him the claim OF
a mother, and the other the claim of
wife.
Any man who establishes the fatal
triangle of self. and wife. and mother
in his home, and who expects to find
peace and happiness in It is a fit sub
ject for an alienist. while a girl who
deliberately adds the trial of dealing
with a mother-in-law to the other
tribulations of matrimony is even
more imbicile. She has gone out of
her way to hunt for trouble with the
certainty of finding it a-plenty.
In all good truth there is no other
danger to a home greater than having
mother-in-law in it. 1t Is a peril
to be avoided. IL possible. by the pru-
dent. but II is not possiblesalways to
avoid the danger. Circumstances
arise which make it necessary for
mother-in-law and daughter-in-law to
live together, and the only thing they
can do to conserve the happiness of
the man they love is for them to
make the best OF trying situation
Possibly the most effective way in
which this can be done is for the one
who is staying in the others home to
bear continually in mind that she is
a guest. and to conduct herself ac-
cordingly.
IL a man takes his wife to live with
his mother let her never forget that
she is in another woman's house, and
that she has no right to interfere in
any way with its established order,
or the manner in which It is run.
1t Is her home, and her way of do
ing things. and her daughter-in-law
should adapt herself to the ways of
the household. as any other courte-
Gus. guest would. without trying to
change them.
And it would be even more efica-
cious for the mother-in-Iaw who goes
to live with her daughter-in-law to
feel herself always a guest who must
pay her way by making herself agree
able.
OF course this is a hard thing for
lne inOIher 10 90 because the money
that runs the house Is her sons, and
she feels that what Is her sons Is
hers. But this is not true as regards
the home. Every woman's home is
her castle and she has an inalienable
right to open or close her door at will.
Wherefore the mother-in-law does
well to keep ever before her eyes the
fact that she is the guest OF her
daughter-in-law. and that a guest IS
not free to make suggestions about
the way her hostess manages her
household, and that she keeps her
mouth shut even when she sees that
her hostess uses her best china every
day, and doesn't snap out the lights
every time she leaves Q room. and
that she throws things into the gar
oage that ought to 60 into the stock
pot, and that she doesn't do things
the way she did when she kept house.
II women would only remember to
conduct themselves as II they were
guests when they live In another wo-
mans house 1t would make the
dreaded in-laws much more agreeable
people with whom to live than they
are.
Dorothy Dix's articles appear reEu-
larly every Monday. Wednesday and
Friday.
Copyright. 1873. by The Wheeler Syn
dicate IIncl