davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-10-05
SEVEN

Is apt to feel that the whole world is rolling Nown hill into his mouth ana to make up his mind that hefty exer- tion on his part is no longer needed. Why keep givng always the top of the basket when second rate wares will fetch the price as neatly? To Herford's credit be 1t said that, if any such notion ever bobbed into his head, il bobbed out again yelling for mercy.
 But, dear me, I must not seem to e suggesting that Herford slaves over his fun, or that he spends an entire week polishing a single line" If l understand his method. he perspires inspirations. It Is a dangerous thing for second rate inspirations to come his way. He mows them down with great fury in order that first-rate in spirations may frisk in a free field such. for example, as This is the Yak so negligee" or Beware the Le-o-pard my child" or the one like best of all, to-Wit:
 Man loves the dog because he'1l stay
 And listen to his jokes all day.
 The dog loves man because he sheers
 His coat, and clips his tail and ears
 Copyright. 1919. by The Bell Syndi-
 cate. Incl
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-10-05

case it pictures the Herford that ought to be, whether he is or not English at bottom-in even his gayest moods a perfect gentleman-the Oliver we have taken to our bosoms stands out among American humorists as kind of coffee house wit transplanted into modern America and, although capable of frohcsome mischief at time, invariably polished and elegant and irreproach- able, in short humorist for the pret- tiest and daintiest of matinee girls. If you question it, pick out the prettiest and daintiest of matinee girls and try her with Herford cherubs.
 Or watch her as she opens 'the Bash ful Earthquake" (poems by Herford, drawings by ditto) and comes to dedi- cation thus charmingly worded:
 ITO THE ILLUSTRATOR
 "in grateful acknowledgement of his
 amiable
 condescention in lending his exaui- delecate art to the establishment of poor verses from his sincerest ad-
 mirer
 THE AUTHOR"
 admit that this is in principle a common enough species of fun. Il reminds you of Bill Yves self -admira- ton, or of Artemus Wards, and recalls the glorious nerve once displayed by George Bernard Shaw. A new Shaw play was being given, and thereScame shouts of Author! Authori' and C. E $. stro1led out before the curtain, sur
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-10-05

mania for kittens. though you would guess it from his writings. He has not only devoted a book to them but em- beIlished anothr volume with these re- markable verses:
 Gather Kittens while ye may
 Time brings only Sorrow,
 And the Kittens of today
 Will be old cats tomorrow, to say nothing of a poem called "rhe Music of Tomorrow and telling how Montague Meyerbeer Mendelssohn Green took off his hat whenever he met a cat, not because he respected cats, put because he worshipped the violin and the fugues and sonatas that might
 "possibly hide
 "Jrncomposed in her-well-in her
 tuneful inside.
 In the days of their youth. Herford and Miss Carolyn were great pals, ana among her tales of Herford, 1 remem- Der one about his thinking up a glori- ous fine joke, hiring hanson, riding around all the afternoon to hunt out everybody he knew and tell the loKe
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-10-05
Gather kittens while ye may

, and ending by cabling it to his father in Europe.
 Extravagant? What difference if it
 was? He could always be extravagant and make up for 1t later, and in those days he had no care whatever for mere material considerations, anyhow. You should have seen his studiol Every conceivable sort of artistic rubbish
 piled up, and up, and up, until his only
 hope of relief was a periodical auction. WONDERFULLY ABSENT MINDED. According to sundry and various Her ford yarns, Oliver is absentminded at best-which accounts for partly, and has added to his fame. Do you chance i to have heard yarn about how he ! bumped into an old crony he had not | seen for years and said, cordially, You must look me up, man; I've an awful lot ] to tell you?"
 "All right said the other. Whats 1 your addressY'
 "Ohw said Oliver, vaguely, Some
 where up town. Now, let me see--it's -its--really l don't remember at the countenance brightened-"I can find 1 out"
 | Removing his hat and consulting a ! row of figures pasted inside it. Her | ford went OH, "Ah. yes, yes. My tele- l phone number! You see when I forge. can always call the place up on th<
 telephone and ask them where it is.' | Having told of this n vest-pocket account of Herford in the American Magazine, Frank Marshall White goes
 on to say that not by any means all | the Herford stories should be swallow 1 ed without the well known g. of s., for there are unprincipled scalawags who
 invent proposterosities by the dozen
 and ring in Oliver as hero. Thanks to 1 these injustices, many people think Herford must spend his time running
 for dear life to avoid being eaDn by
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-10-05
AMERICA FINDS
 ITS BADEN
Wonderful Curative Power of Mineral Deposit Proven. Wa ter Recommended for Blood Troubles of Long Standing. Uses Include Treatment of Rheumatism, Pellagra, let ter, Eczema, Etc.

Likened to the great Baden Springs of Europe-such are the curative wonders of a mineral deposit composed of Iron. Sulphur and Potash recently found out in Mississippi It is commonly known that each-Iron, Sulphur and Potash-are almost considered specifics for all forms of diseases caused by an impure blood The combination of all three of these clements as supplied by Ma ture easily surpasses the chemists fondest hopes. It can't be done like Nature did it.
 Simply by treating this mineral deposit with pure water, a preparation known as ul-Ferro-Sol has been produced and is now being offered for sale everywhere. As the result of an investigation by the United States Government it was proven that Sul-Ferro-Sol had cured eases of PeI- lagra of from to years standing; cured cases of Eczema up to 20 years standing. Remarkable cures of cases of Rheumatism. Tetter. and other forms of blood poison were also recorded. Data of testimony covering any disease mentioned will be furnished on request
 ul-Ferro-Sol. the great proven edy for Rheumatism, Eczema, Tetter and all forms of impure blood.
 At all drug stores. everywhere. Liberal bottles for one dollar.
 Interesting booklet. Road to Health, 7 upon request. The Sul-Ferro-Sol Co.,. Mont gomery. Alabama. Desk B.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-10-05

spoke admiringly of Walter Pater. who was so conscientious that he never wrote above thirty lines a day. An sighed another of the young as- pirants for fame, that's something
 quite parelleled in my own best writ
 ing. There are times when l give at
 least two days to constructing one para graph"
 Yes unused a third, solemnly. 'It
 is much the same with me. The rhythm
 of single line has often occupied my
 thoughts for an entire day"
 | Then, from among the sofa pillows
 on divan in corter, came the mild.
 slow voice of Herford. saying, with rare simplicity. And I, too, have often spent week polishing single word" By some curious freak of fortune,
 both the foregoing tales have got into print, from which I am stealing them
 without batting an eye, for l remember Herford's own test of joke. If it's good, it's mnet" And from print I steal Miss Carolyn Wells Testimony that Herford has perfect raging
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-10-05
veyed his audience, and said:
 trXNall urha dn Nni1 thin k of ii

veyed his audience, and said:
 Well, what do you think of it?"
 "Rotton!" cried a spectator.
 'T quite agree with you" said Shaw. ''but what are two against so many"
 However it takes a Herford to car ry off that sort of joke with consum mate grade. No matter how startling his pranks, they leave always an inn pression of faultless good breeding.
 have often wished that Herford were less incurably gentleman, for his school charm has greatly limited his output All the incest clubs want Herford around. Swarms of dear, lovely, attractive people overrun his studio and eat up his time. Besides editors have been so bewitched with Herford that they paid him anything he asked for his jingles and pictures and he could loaf week on the pro- duct of a nrorning--and did.
 HIS UNPUBLISHED WIT
 But there are cancellations. Much that fails to reach us in black and white arrives by word of mouth. Every body who ever knew Herford has Her ford yarns to tell-how he remarked one day, Let's go down to the Waldorf Astoria and hear the rich peo- ole eat,"-how he said to righ' reverened gentleman whose something or-other-b by marriage had gone on th' stage, well, Bishop, actresses VII happen in the best regulated families: and how he once drawled, as if talk ing to himself, with thoughtful, won dering pause where I insert dash why do men marry-Lillian Russell? Several years ago Herford chancet ! to fall in with a group of young writeri i who were talking about literary styi and the labor it costs. One or then
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-10-05
Dressing Contest

In the great hospitals maintained by the United States government for the re- construction of it's wounded defenders every effort Is made to encourage a healthful, cheerful morale, free from dis couragement and gloom. For this pur- pose fresh air. sunshine and competitive exercises hvae been found more bene- ficial than whole carloads of pills, says the Popular Mechanics Magazine. An il- lustration portrays one of the mosk hot ly contested events in recent field day, or athletic carnival. staged by the crip- pied veterans. Three contestants, each handicapped by the loss of hand, are racing to see who can most quickly dress himself.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-10-05

as they enjoy entire freedom from cohc and never wear out their shoes.
 But I learn that even bodyless cherub has his drawbacks. When it comes to a matter of discipline-well. observe how profoundly Oliver Herford has gone into the problem and with what results. Beneath a drawing, of a head positively y-nothing- else cherub, read his solemncholy lines: "A cherub who from right had
 swerved,
 When told spanking he deserved, Replied, Good sir. do not doubt it. But what are you going to do about
 it'?"
 Something tells me that I ought to have begun this chatter about Herford with a biographical note relating that he was born in England, and, as soon as he was old enough to know where
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-10-05
OLIVER HERFORR

U rem ember those delightful cherubs you see in pictures just heads, with tiny wings to them. If I were getting up cherubs myself, I think I should favor that kind,
 e T E-. -@T.@
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1919-11-28
DOCTORS FIND
REMEDY FOR
COLDS AND FLU
Calotabs, the New Nausealess
Calomel Tablets, Cut Short
Colds and May Prevent Flu
By Keeping Liver Active.

Physicians have learned from experience.
during the epidemic of influenza. that one Of
the most important factors in the preven-
ton of flu and pneumonia is to keep the
liver active so that the digestive organs NAV
be in perfect working order and the system
thereby enabled to throw off colds check
sore threats. and resist serious :omplica-
tons For this purpose they have found
that the new, nausealess calomel tablets
called Calotabs, are far more effective even
than the old style calomel, which was fcy
merly the universal favorite. Calotats do
not weaken the patient, interfere with
the appetite and digestion
At the first sign of cold Or sore threat.
doctors recommend one Calotab Al bed time
with a swallow of water-that's all No salts.
no nausea, nor the slightest interference
with your diet, pleasure or work. Next morn.
ing you wake up feeling fine, your liver ia
active. and your appetite is keen for good
breakfast.
For you, protection Calotaos arc .;cId only
in original sealed packages, price thirty five
cents. All druggists recommend and guar
antee Calotabs. Your money back you are
not delighted with them.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1919-11-28
GUM TALKS Of
W|FE'S TROUBLES

John w Gum. senior member OF the
firm of Gum & Co, 654 Third street
Macon. Ga. gives the following testi-
mony regarding Eel Vigor:
INV wife was down with a serious
disorder of the kidneys and had suf-
fered so long that had begun to think
that she would never get UP from her
bed. Nothing did her any good. Her
Joints and limbs were swollen and she
was in misery all the time. At last
I was persuaded bv someone who came
to our house to try Ell Vigor and | got
a supply
Inside of two days after she started
taking Eel Vigor 1 noticed an improve
ment. She began eating like a well
person and enjoyed it. She kept right
on taking Ell Vigor and before Ions
she was up and going. She is just as
well as anybody now and is like
different person. since Ell Nigor re-
lieved her troubles"
FL Vigor is sold in Birmingham and
vicinity by the following leading drug
eists: Arnold Masberg Drug company
TAYLOR Drug company. Inc; Fulton
Drug company, Bessemer; Rochester
Hall Drug company, Ensley; Halls
Drug store. Fairfield; Slack Drug com
p.ny. North Birmingham; East End
Drug company, East End Birmingham
Drug company. and by leading drug
Rists everywnere.-Adv.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1919-11-28

Mfho. Lula Df<IbO.>1Es1
Many local people are telling of the
wonderful benefit they have derived
from the use Of Plant Juice in all
ments of long standing.
For instance. Mrs. Lula DeRoncey,
of Weems, Ala. who is popular among
a large circle of friends here. recently
stated:
For the past 10 wears I have suf-
fered from stomach trouble in the
form Of indigestion and would have
terrible pains after eating. could
scarcely keep any food in my stomach,
as it would ferment A. cause gas to
form / would have such choking
feeling at times that L could hardly
get my breath: I had such terrible
dizzy spells that I felt as If | would
fall over; l had pains all through my
body, could not sleep at night and felt
weak and all run down. lost in
weight and was reduced to skin and
ZONES l started to take Plant Juice
and got great relief from the first
few doses I took; since I have con-
tinued to take it l can honestly say
that 1t has put me on my feet and I
feel like living again. I eat all kinds
my meals. ! sleep well and have no
more trouble with gas i have gained
over four pounds in two weeks and
feel that l can honestly recommend
Plant Juice to anyone as it did so
much for me-"
Plant Juice Is sold in birmingham at
Norton's Drug Store. Fourth avenue
and Twentieth street--Adv.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1919-11-28
ANOTHER OF
NATURES WONDERS
Rare Mineral Deposit Discov-
cred in Mississippi. Unusual
Combination of Iron, Sui
phur and Potash. Water
Proven Success in Treatment
of Disordered 8 lood or
Troubles Arising Therefrom.

Iron, Sulphur and Potash-all three
made and combined by Nature in Ma
lures own perfect way.
Nature has made few things with
out purpose, and the purpose of this
mineral deposit is unquestionably
that of blood purifier.
By simply extracting this mineral
with water a remedy is made, known
as Sul-Ferro-Sol. And so Sul-Ferro-
Sol is nothing more than mineral
water rich in Iron, Sulphur and Pot
ash.
AS remedy for Rheumatism, Ec-
zema, letter and other manifesto
tions of an impure blood, Sui
Ferro-So, is most highly recon-
mended.
If your trouble is casued by bad
blood try Sul-Ferro-Sol, the great
natural remedy.
Interesting booklet, Road to
Health" upon request. The Sui
Ferro-Sol Co., Montgomery, Alabama.
Desk B.
! Sold by Rochester Hall Drug Com
pany, Ensley; the Darlington Phar-
macy, Pratt City, and by all drug
gists everywhere. Liberal bottles
for $1.00.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1919-11-28
CHILLS, COLDS,
FEVERNHNESS
Black-Draught Is Used By
Virginia Lady for Colds,
Fever and 9th er
Troubles With
Fine Results

Rocky Mount. va.-Mlss Mae Chit
wood. of this place. recently stated: 4
lava used Black-Draught for colds and
stomach trouble and certainly have
found it very satisfactory
When l would feel bad and feverish,
as though l was taking a fresh cold, l
uould make a good cup of Black
Draught tea and it would soon set me
all right.
can recommend 1t as a splendid
laxative and gladly do so. You may pub
fish my statement"
wnen you feel chilly, tired. feverish,
headachy and fear that you are taking
cold. take a good dose of the old. relia-
BILE. liver medicine you have heard SO
much about-Thedford' Black -DrNught
1t is made from purely vegetable in
gradients acts in a gentle. natural way
and by helping to drive out poisonous
waste matter from your system. it will
often, il taken in time. prevent a chill
from developing into a cold.
benefit in such cases.
Try it. the next time you chill or
sneeze.
Thousands of people during the pas
20 years. have found Black DrauEht OF
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1919-11-28
BESSEMER NEWS

Bessemer, November N.-(SpeciaD
Thanksgiving was observed as a gem
eral holiday in the city. and was thor
oughly enjoyed by the residents, each
individual seeking a favorite form OF
diversion. Although the price of tur-
Keys scared high. from the reports of
the markets in the city there were few
people who did not have their regulation
Thanksgiving dinner
The most exciting event of the day
was the leaving of the several special
cars of enthusiasts for the football game
at Fleetwood at o'clock. 1t was a
noisy, good-natured throng of high
school pupils and supporters of the local
team in holiday mood, cheering, blow
ing horns and giving the high school
yell.
Services were held at the Church of
God with DR., w. P. Price preaching the
Thanksgiving sermon, and a large nlySA
Der attened Many hunting parties left
the city early in the morning, and the
street cars were filed during the after
noon with matinee parties, and also the
atre parties for the evening.
The local moving picture theatres were
crowded all during the afternoon ana
evening, and the small boys of the city
had good time with toy pistols, spark
lerS and small fireworks
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1919-11-28
VANDY DEFEATS THE.
TIGERS IN STARTLING
EXHIBITION OF BALL
CommodOres Win by Hitting
Line and BY Open Field
Work of Latham and
Berryhill

Nashville, November ~
(Special.) = Vanderbilt tri-
umphed over Sewanee, her
ancient rival today in one of the
most startling exhibitions OF
football ever staged in the bat
ties between Commodore and
Tiger, the final score being 80
to ri in favor of the gold and
Black.
Vanderbilt won by hitting the lien
and by the brilliant open field work
of Latham and Berryhill. Sewanee
placed her dependence in the forward
pass and time after time worked them,
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1919-11-28
REAL ESTATE ACTIVE

Several real estate deals for business
property have been made this week that
has made the past few days the banner
week in the sale of real estate during
a most active period. Among the sales
was the store building occupied by l..
Barr of 100 and Ill Nineteenth street,
which was sold to Sam Rainier by c. y.
Ebersole of Birmingham for the consid-
GRAFTON of $4,000. The property has a
frontage of 40 feet on Nineteenth street,
which makes the purchase price $3.50 a
front foot, the highest price ever paid
for real estate in Bessemer.
The store building at 1921 Second ave-
nue. was sold to Oddo Pasquale by Erfick
& Lefkovits for $4,000 The buildin., is
two stories and fronts % feet on Second
avenue. Five lots on Nineteenth street
between Fifth alley and Sixth avenue,
which were the property of Jake Rosen-
baum of Gadsden, were sold to DIR. T. c.
Donald and Ben G. Perry for the con
sideration of $4,000.
Sam Romano bought the J. Marks resi-
dence on Sixth avenue and Eighteenth
street, which is one of the hanGsomest in
the city, for sl2,5oo
The building located at 2oo4 Second ave
nue. and occupied as a laundry, was
sold by w. S. Lowell to Charlie Gong
and Sam Lee, who will continue to OPP
crate laundry in the building.
The deals concluded this week aggre-
gate, $4,000 and freak all records in the
sale CT business property
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1919-11-28
GRIFFIN-WILLIAMS

The marriage of Miss Marguerite VIII
liams and Mr.. Charles Griffin of Whit
man, Miss, was soemnzed at the resi-
dence of the brides parents Mr.. and
Mrs j. E. Williams, on Fourth avenue,
Thursday afternoon shortly after 4
o clock. The ceremony was performed
by the Rev f. H. Hutchinson in the pres
ence of the relatives and intimate friends
of the young couple. The bride wore a
going-aw2y suit. and Immediately fol-
lowing tbs ceremony. Mr. and Mrs. Grif-
fin left for Whitman, where they will
make their home. Mrs. Griffin was
very popular young lady, and Mr.. Grit
fin holds a position as county demon
strator of agriculture at Whitman.
The Rev and Mrs. E. VI. Hutchinson
have returned from Georgia, where they
attended a state convention of the Chris
ton church, and also visited relatives.
The Rev Hutchinson will fill his ptf~S
at the First Christian church at both
services Sunday.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1919-11-28

Sherman for Adams. Neill for Sherman.
Wade for Bailey Buckner for Wade,
Meenich for Hendrix, McGill for Meen-
ioh. Hendrix for McGin. Goar for Ter
foss, Zerfoss for Goar, Sherman for
Floyd. Floyd for Sherman, Berryhill
tor Richardson, Wigs for Wade. Sc
vance, Werner for Skidmore. Council
for Goughlan. Query for Burton, Sat-
tarlee for BEETLE. Touchdowns: Van
derbilt, Latham ?, Zerfoss Rerryhill,
Hendrix For Sewanee, Harper
Coughlan. Goals from touchdowns,
Cody 5. Clark s. Officials: Umpire,
Thomas Purdue); referee. Finlay (vir-
Ginia; head linesman, Huntington (Uni-
,Versity of Chicago; timekeepers, Char 4
ley Brown Wonderfully and WORKMAN
tSewanee).