The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1919-03-20


Such is the perversity Of human
nature that, while returning soldiers
and sailors are trying their hardest
to get jobs. men with good jobs are
enthusiastically going on strikes.
The other day the stork brought
two boys and two girls, all in one
litter. to Philadelphia man and his
wife who already had 10 children. Still
we suppose the Lord knows his bust
ness.
II is certain that this community
will not bulge an inch on the airplane
business until it is definitely given out
how many miles fellow can make on
gallon of gas with one Of those
things.
Old Bill Misgivens has received
word from his brother Ike, back in
Indiana, saying. "I'm in favor of this
here League of Nations because Wood
row may not be here to keep us out
Of Il next time a war comes along"
q 4
There really isn't any need TO call
the editors attention to typographical
errors in any particular issue of this
paper. We always hear about those
errors when the family at home looks
over the paper on press day evenings.
Vexing problem Of conduct: When
one is talking across the table to
woman he doesn't know very well,
should he inform her ut once she has
dropped some gravy on her waist, or
should one wait and let her find it her
self after it is irreparably soaked in ?
4 4 o
Ii is told that an Emmett couple,
just married, boarded train and were
so absorbed in each other that the
groom handed the conductor the mar
riage certificate when he called for
the tickets. This is good for long,
weary journey, said the conductor,
"0ut not on the Oregon Short Line"
Q Q q
Returned soldiers tell of a negro
trooper still over in France who quick
ly tired OF the war, and then tired
Jain Of the war after the war" and
now says. "Ef even git back home,
dey1l haff to burn de woods and sift
de ashes before dey even get me in
another war"
A woman bought lamp, but after
using It couple of times took it back
to the store Whats the matter
with the lamp" asked the clerk.
ats too much like my husband" re-
piled the woman, "has too much brass
about it, is not remarkably brilliant.
requires a great deal Of attention, is
unsteady, flares up occasionally. is
always out at bedtime and is bound
to smokel"
didn't raise my boy to be soldier,
but cowardly, sneaking, yellow
hearted whalp,
Who helped the Huns by prating of his
conscience in a wailing, whining,
moaning sort of yelp.
didn't raise my boy to be soldier,
to bravely face the deadly shot and
she'll
raised him up a conscientious Stacker
and you note that he's been doing
fairly well.
Lincoln Eyre. the war correspond
mt. tells of rascally French inn
,eeper who had given Yank bad
,ieee Of money The ineensed dough
10Y went back and demanded good
money. and after some argument the
nnkeeper made good, Just as the
oughboy was about TO leave, the inn
.eeper called him back. Pardon,
monsieur, but vii you kindly give me ,
ack that bad coin7" "Can't be done, /
'renehy." ehuekled the doughboy: lit $
box me three hours to pass il myself. /"
Many people at home have wondered
shy the soldier boys in France have
ot written more fully Of events in T
he war zone. The following letter 9
rom soldier to his mother tells the
eason: Dear Mother: have dis c
hcved no officer. violated no rule Of I