davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1919-05-28

Spectrul distance during apple ana
cherry time.
HENRY N. STATE"
Here's something that makes me
feel fine. A post card from a boy
who went overseas with the Ameri-
can army:
: ~ don't k1o1O Ho1I, but your col
tEnsz, whenever I could read e, look
ed good to me. This Is TO let YOU
EEo10 I AN COMING HOME. Fred
Litz, 165th MGehtae Gun Co., RGis-
bo10 Division"
Wen give you a hand, Fred, and
anything else you want.
Checkered Cat.
Il think that cat must be like q
game Of checkers" says Mrs. Lee.
She has made some moves. The
first time / saw her was at 18th and
P streets. Three weeks later she
was at 18th and R-still dead"
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1919-05-28

Here's a person who evidently
knows who the nine boys are and
complains about their not being in
the celebration and then falls down
on the one practical thing he could
do-which is to furnish US with a
clue which would result in getting
these nine to the part
In the following communication,
HENRY NJ. STATE rises to heights
of fame:
"In your paper Of May II, 1919,
your correspondent, signing himself
"A Disciple of Henry George makes
favorable comment on the idea Of
establishing a War Memorial Fruit
and Nut Tree Grove. suggested by
another correspondent, and adding
a suggestion himself that 1t would be
a valuable asset to have an apiary In
the midst Of the grove. (By way Of
information, an apiary Is not place
where they raise monkeys, but where
bees are kept) And l heartily agree
with him.
His idea Immediately raised the
thought in my mind how well the
bees would keep the women and
girls out Of the grove, but allow me
to make the suggestion that it would
be a better idea to propagate q hor-
nets nest on every. tree in the place
- 80 F.,~ -p~--- ~ 80 ~ -
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1919-05-28

Machinists' Lodge, No. 325, Of Ar
genta, Ark, recently sent out letters
to all their district lodges and to To-
Gals of the machinists' unions, urg-
ing them to support public owner
ship of railways.
The Denver municipal coal depart
ment took over the work Of supply
ing the seven pumping stations Of
the newly acquired municipal water
plant on November / last. The pri-
yate water company paid IS per ton
for coal used at these plants. The
municipal coal department will fur
nish it at $3.15 a ton. About 10000
tons are used annually.
In answer to my plaintive query,
What's funnier than the bronze
whiskers on the Dupont statue?" I
get this anonymously: "You."
HENRY HALL has my hearty sup
port in his criticism Of the movie
bore" and it Is not always Of the
masculine gender, either. Doting
mothers read subtitles to their chill
dren that often bring a blush q
shame to grown-ups' cheeks.
Managers would confer a favor on
a long-sufering public if a request
for silence was thrown on the screen
every half hour.
The force and enjoyment Of many
good productions is lost by this con-
slant reading aloud. I thank you
MRS. HAMLET.
The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1919-05-28
Charkarod Caf

Wen give you a hand, Fred, and
anything else you want.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1919-03-12

Once In a great while there may be
little sectional row between the East
and West, but II never amounts to any.
thing. The real sectional differences
which crop out In debates from time
to time are those between the North
and the South. Only recently there
was a furry Of some proportions
caused by a remark Of Senator Len
root to the effect that Southern sena-
tors were somewhat irresponsible as
10 the size Of appropriations, particu-
larry when a large amount Of the
money was expended in the South and
nearly all Of It raised by taxes In the
North. This aroused the Ire Of several
Southerners, who did not mince words
in expressing themselves against the
utterance of such sentiments In the
senate. Lenr0ot's words were that
Representative in both houses Of con-
gress from the Southern states have
very little responsibility from ma
tional standpoint concerning expendi-
lures. providing only the appropria-
tIops shall be expended in their own
states"
Senator Fletcher of Florida in re-
plying said that he could understand
how something Of that sort might be
said on the stump in the heat Of po-
lltical campaign for political purposes,
but a statement coming Ike that In
the senate goes beyond all bounds Of
propriety or Of justice and is wholly
unwarranted."
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1919-03-12
GIVE CALIFORNIA SYRUP OF FIGS
AT ONCE If BILIOUS OR
coNSTlPATED.

Look at the tongue, motherl If
coated, it is sure sign that your lit
tie ones stomach, liver and bowels
needs a gentle, thorough cleansing at
once.
When peevish, cross, listless, pale,
doesn't sleep, doesn't eat or act natu-
rally, or is feverish, stomach sour,
breath bad; has stomach-ache, sore
throat, diarrhea, full of cold, give 81
teaspoonful of California Syrup of
Figs" and in a few hours all the foul,
constipated waste, andigested food
and sour bile gently moves out of the
little bowels without gripping, and you
have a well, playful child again.
You needn't coax sick children to
take this harmless fruit laxative :"
they love its delicious taste, and it
always makes them feel splendid.
Ask your druggist for a bottle OF
california Syrup of Figs" which has
directions for babies, children of all
ages and for grown-ups plainly on the
bottle. Beware of counterfeits sold
here. To be sure you get the genuine,
ask to see that it is made by the "Cali-
fornia Fig Syrup Company" Refuse
any other kind with contempt.-Adv.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1919-03-12
SAFE, GENTLE REMEDY
CLEANSES YOUR KIDNEYS

For centuries GOLD MEDAL HARLEM
Oil has been a standard household remedy
for kidney, liver, bladder and stomach
trouble, and all diseases connected with
the urinary organs. The kidneys and bad-
der are the most important organs of the
body. They are the filters, the purifiers of
your blood. II the poisons which enter
your system through the blood and stom-
sch are not entirely thrown out by the
kidneys and bladder, you are doomed.
WEAKNESS, sleeplessness, nervousness.
dependency, baekache, stomach trouble,
headache, pain in loins and lower abdo-
men, gall stones, gravel, difficulty when
urinating. cloudy and bloody urine. rheu-
matism, seiatica and lumbago, all warn you
to look after your kidneys and bladder
All these indicate some weakness of the
kidneys or other organs or that the enemy
microbes which are always present in your
system have attacked your weak spots.
GOLD MEDAL HARLEM Oil Capsules are
what you need.
They are not patent medicine" nor
new discovery" For 200 years they
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1919-03-12

have been a standard household remedy.
They are the pure, original imported Haar.
lem Oil your great-grandmother used. ard
are perfectly harmless. The healing, sooth
ing oil soaks into the cells and lining OF
the kidneys and through the bladder, driy.
ing out the poisonous germs. New life,
fresh strength and health will come as YOU
continue the treatment. When complete.
" restored TO your usual vigor, continue
taking capsule or two each day; they will
keep you in condition and prevent a re-
turn Of the disease
DO not delay minute. Delays are es.
pecially dangerous in kidney and bladder
trouble. All druggists sell GOLD MEDAL
Harlem Oil Capsules They will refund
the money if not as represented. GOLD
MEDAL Harlem Oil Capsules are i'm.
ported direct from the laboratories in Hol.
land. They are prepared in correct guam.
tity and convenient form, are easy TO take
and are positively guaranteed to give
prompt relief In three sizes, sealed pack.
ages. Ask for the original imported
GOLD MEDAL. Accept no substitutes
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1919-03-12

much noise. think I'll Just rap you
over the head, or how do you wish tc
die?"
She expressed a preference for poi
son. So he mixed bumper Of bichlor
ide of mercury and forced her to drink
1t, she says. She became i'll. He pro
fessed regret and gave her olive oil as
an antidote. Then he asked her:
NOW, viii you marry met"
Mrs. Clayton was too weak to reply,
He summoned physician who had her
sent to the county hospital.
parzIo Under Arrest.
Detective sergeants William Begley
and John Adams Of the Deering sta
ton arrested Parzio last night. He Is
being held. pending Mrs. Gayton's re-
covery. He denied forcing the woman
TO drink poison or threatening her with
a revolver.
"Will you marry him?" d reporter
asked her last night
mo"
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1919-03-12
GREEN'S AUGUST FLOWER

Has been used for oil ailments that
are caused by a disordered stomach
and inactive liver. such as sick head
ache, constipation. sour stomach,
nervous indigestion, fermentation of
food, palpitaton Of the heart caused by
gases in the stomach. August Flower
Is gentle laxative, regulates digestion
both in stomach and intestines. cleans
and sweetens the stomach and alimen-
tary canal, stimulates the liver to Sc
crete the bile and impurities from the
blood. Sold in all civilized countries.
Give 1t a trial.--Adv.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1919-03-12
Catarrhal Deafness Cannot Be Cured

by local applications as they cannot reach
the diseased portion OF the ear. There is
only one way to cure Catarrhal Deafness,
and that is by a constitutional remedy.
HALLS CATARRH MEDICINE acts
through the Bloo3 on the Mucous Surfaces
OF the System. Catarrhal Deafness ia
caused by an infamed condition OF the
mucous lining of the Eustachian Tube.
When this tube Is infamed you have q
rumbling sound or imperfect hearing, and
when II is entirely closed, Deafness Is the
result. Unless the Inflammation can be re-
NAL condition, hearing may be DESTROYED
forever. Many cases of Deafness are
caused by Catarrh. which is an infiamed
condition OF the Mucous Surfaces
ONE HUNDRED DOLLARS for any
case of Catarrhal Deafness that cannot
be cured by HALLS CATARRR
MEDICINE.
AN Druggists TIC. Circulars free.
r. J. Cheney g. Co.. Toledo. Ohio.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1919-03-12
CREAM FOR CATARRH
OPENS UP N0STRILS
Tells How TO Get Quick Relief
from Head-coIds. It's Splendid!

In one minute your clogged nostrils
will open, the air passages of your
head win clear and you can breathe
freely. No more hawking, snuffling,
blowing. headache, dryness. No strug-
Cling for breath at night, your cold or
catarrh will be gone.
Get a small bottle of Ely's Cream
Balm from your druggist now. Apply
4 little of this fragrant, antiseptic,
healing cream in your nostrils. 1t pen
etrates through every air passage of
the head, soothes the infamed or
swollen mucous membrane and relief
comes instantly.
It's just fine. Don't stay stuffed-up
with cold or nasty catarrh-Relief
ZONES so quickly.-Adv.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1919-03-12

Bucyrus, Ohio-Court Bailiff Calvin
Kniseley found the defendant guilty
in a divorce proceeding here. The de
PENDANTS wife had charged him with
being an hab,tual drunkard. During
the trial Of the case the defendant
disappeared. Cali the defendant"
said Judge Rabst.
''The defendant has gone to get g
driDk,' answered Kniseley
Divorce granted" said Judge
Babst
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1919-03-12

Employment of soldiers who are
discharged from the military service
is one Of the questions that have
given rise to a great deal of dis
cussion and there seems to be consid-
cradle difficulty in solving 1t. The
general belief is that there is employ
ment for any number of men at this
time. At least it is said that there
never was such a demand for labor of
certain kind but 1t is manual labor.
A great many people are having diff
Guilty in finding men to do work and
the agricultural districts, according to
reports, offer plenty of jobs for men
If they are willing to take them.
During the debate on the good roads
proposition in the post office appropri-
alton bill 1t developed that a large
number of soldiers were being used on
roads in states where there are large
encampments. 1t was clair ed that
this good roads appropriation would
afford employment for soldiers. al
though quite a number OF senators
secuted the idea that The returned SOL
diers are going to work as day labor
ers on the roads. On account of the
statement that soldiers still held in
the service were being employed on
roads a provision was inserted in the
bill which makes 1t mandatory to pay
these soldiers the same wages that
other men receive for that work, rath-
er than the $50 a month they draw as
privates.
Senator Thomas of Colorado told the
senate of n soldier who came to him
and talked about the many soldiers
that were now out of Jobs. "They are
not looking for jobs" was the COM
ment of the soldier; "they want posi-
tions. There are plenty of jobs" II is
quite evident that these soldiers do
not want TO 20 back to the farm or 10
drudgery work in shops and mines. It
is also apparent that great many
who were formerly in the country dis
tricts would like to remain in the
cities. All these things are going to
make It difficult TO find employment
for the soldiers when they are dis
charged.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1919-03-12
MAN WOOES WITH
DEADLY POISON
Noman Says He Chose New
Way Because Pistol Was
Too Noisy.
HE'S REAL CAVE MAN
Chicago Man Shows Steadfastness Of
Purpose With Women That
Smaeks Of Delightful
Days of Stone Age.

Chicago.-There is a certain stead
fastness of purpose In the way Of
Morris Parzio with women that smacks
Of the delightful old days of the stone
age, and makes him quite irresistible
As wooer. Mrs. Eleanor Clayton, who
learned about cavemen from him, Is
now coRvalescing at the county hos
pital.
Mr.. ParziO conducts Il meat market
at 1l43 West Harrison street, where
occurred their first meeting in De-
cember OF 1915. Mrs. Clayton came in
as customer. but the business ameni-
ties rapidly ripened into acquaintance.
Mr.. Parzio drugging her and removing
her to a house at 500 South Racine
avenue, she says.
At that time she was IS and single.
Later she met and loved John Clayton.
They were married. The butcher Loeb
tnvar WAS exceedingly enraged, she
said. and told her ''Tll get you yet"
Carried OFF in Auto.
1t was last Monday night. Mrs. Gay
ton. who Is separated from her hus-
band. was at the home of her sister,
Mrs. Fred Patzman, 324& South Wells
street. She says Parzio seized her
while she was entering the home. car
ried her to an automobile and con-
veyed her to his home, over the butcher
shop at 1143 West Harrison. Then he
asked:
"Will you marry met"
"NO."
"All right, I'll kill you" she quotes
him as saying.
He drew a revolver. and then said :
mo. If shoot you It win make too
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1919-03-12

, about lucky hits" the best kind Of sue
cess in any mans life is not that which
comes by accident; the only good for
tune we are justified In hoping for is
that which we Gre capable Of making
for ourselves. And We can only at
tain success by constantly thinking
success.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1919-03-12

Another member Of the staff wants
a raise-says he can't live on his sal.
airy Of $40 week" "Who is it,"
''BuIlem. the bachelor editor Of our
woman's PAGE. He writes those inter
esting articles on how to support a
family of four on S15 a week."-Blr-
guingham Age-Herald.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1919-03-12
Eear. euraIars. shoots At caller.

Atlanta, Ga.-The mere fact that he
Is blind did not prevent Sanford
Thompson. negro. from taking a few
shots one night recently at what he
said he thought were burglars, but
really was a negro woman caller. The
shots, however, went wild. Sc did the
uegress, who yelled frantically for the
police.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1919-03-12
Earn 81 600 on Vacation

Clarence Magoon and Joseph Curtin
decided to take a vacation In the
woods near Greenfield, N. II. In a
months time they trapped 81 foxes,
II cOons. "A skunks. IA minks, and q
light muskrat. This latch netted
them over 81 900.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1919-03-12
True.

Candidates in ancient Rome, to
make themselves popular, gave free
grain to the people,"
Seems like poor politics."
"Still, you can't deny that those
chaps actually tried TO reduce the cost
Of living. Courier-Journal.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1919-03-12

"What is the remedy?" was a query
put to the senate generally but more
particularly to Senator Thomas of
Colorado by Senator Kenyon of Iowa.
He was speaking Of the lack of en-
ploymcnt in this country which was
causing 20 much apprehension, and
continued: eff there is not some rem
edy in carrying on public works, what
is the remedy? The remedy is not to
make speeches about it,"
"Oh," remarked Thomas, making
speeches is a remedy for nothing, es-
pecially in the senate of the United
States"
THAT is the only way we remedy
anything here SO far as 1 know" con-
tinued Kenyon.
Unfortunately" Thomas replied,
that is the only way In which we
transact business here. The other
house votes and does not talk. We
talk and never vote, and of course /
am just as guilty as anybody else"
"The learned senator from Colorado
always talks very interestingly" inter
jected Vardaman. of Mississippi.
Interestingly and too MUCH" &C.
knOwledged Thomas.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1919-03-12
Artistlc Temperament.

'T fear Miss Peacher has an exagger-
ated opinion Of herself"
THAT'S easily explained"
"YesT'
"She posed as Joan Of Arc in So
many tableaux during the war that
she's beginning to think she has a
place in history.'-Blrmingham Age
Herald.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1919-03-12

The drift toward Capitalization in tho
federal government and toward pa
ternalism generally continues, In spite
of the protests of a very few who
would still cling to the old ideas
Of what the government was In
the early days. There have been
several speeches made on this subject
and solemn warnings have been issued.
but it is observed that there is not
much use in trying to stop the 1eople
from coming to the government for ev-
erything possible. The idea seems to
have grown into large proportions
that the government can do almost
anything for the people, and that It Is
the duty Of the government to support
the people rather than that Of the peo-
pie TO support the government.
A great many people may be aroused
when the new revenue law goes INTO
effect and IL is found that few viii es-
cape taxation. Every married man
with an income of more than $1,000 a
year and every single man with an in
come of more than 81 900 a year will
be compelled to pay an income tax.
This will bring home to at least 20
100000 people the fact that fl costs
money to carry on war. Then there
are other taxes levied in the bill which
Will reach many people. and which wild
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1919-03-12

Senator Vardaman Of Mississippi
says the whole country is crying for
farm labor. 81 receive from one TO
fifty letters from my constituents in
Mississippi every day. urging me to
use what little influence l may have
with the war department to get the
boys out of the army, in order that
they may come back and help to make
a crop the present year. And if The
boys are not permitted to go home
pretty soon they VIII not be able TO
make a crop during the year 1919.
think it is an outrage and an injustice
to the soldiers and a misfortune to the
country that the farmers boys are not
discharged and sent back to their
homes"
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1919-03-12
Boy Fatally Burned
in Boiler of Water

ST. Louis. Mo.-August Teska,
8, was fatally scalded when he
fell into a boiler Of water while
his mother was engaged in do
ing the family washing. Mrs.
Teska had placed the boiler on
the floor while her husband was
repairing a stove pipe.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1919-03-12
Acquired by Practice.

Fiancee-How did you guess there
were a lot of nice young men where /
spent my vacationT
Fiance-You've learned to kiss so
nicely.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1919-03-12
makina conueraation.

Always remember thnt many a man
vbo Inquiries AFTER your health really
doc@n't ,urp rap whether It's good
bad or didsreut.-James0n Ce1.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1919-03-12

The path Of sureess in business s.
Invariably the path Of commnB Sense.
-otwithsian dlng all that has been said
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1919-03-12
Uncle Eben.

Oars a difference" said Uncle
Eben, between happiness and pleas
ure. One is home song an de others
mostly jazz"
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1919-03-12

It's all right to pray for the things
you want, but it's good idea to work
for the things you actually need.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1919-03-12
LONG DEBATE DUE
OVER ARMY BILL
MANY SENATORS TO TAKE THE
OPPORTUNITY TO TALK OF
MILITARY CONDITIONS.
MEASURE MAY BE DEFEATED
Minority Leader Mann Has Joyous
Time With Larsen Of Georgia Who
Seeks to Put a Curb on Discus
sion.
By ARTHUR w. DUNN.

Observation-Disclosures all signs fail
the debate on the army appropriation
bill is going to be long drawn out.
The whole army condition is going TO
be threshed out thoroughly, particu-
larry in the senate. 1t is somewhat of
surprise TO those who want TO avoid
an extra session that the army bill has
been delayed so long, for the talk upon
it may defeat it and if it is defeated
an extra session will be necessary liz
order to get money to support the
army. 1t is evident that many sena-
tors are waiting for fitting oppor-
tunity to say what they think about
army conditions and they will take an
opportunity to do so when the regular
military appropriation bin is before
the senate. On several occasions the
military bill has been the last to be
considered and once or twice it has
failed to pass before congress adj
journed.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1919-03-12

Some people borrow trouble and
some others wait for the neighbors
to throw II over the back fence.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1919-03-12

Don't stay upset. Eat a tablet of
Pape's Diapepsin and Immediately the
Indigestion, gases, acidity and all stom-
ach distress ends.
Pape's Diapepsin tablets are the sur
est, quickest stomach believers in the
world. They cost very little at drug
stores. Adv.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1919-03-12

probably aid in keeping up high prices
all Of which will give all the peop,e
Information that the government is not
entirely made of money and that The
money that has been paid ont in al
the extravagances that have been GO
ing on for several years past will have
TO be paid by somebody, and in the
end it is the people themselves.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1919-03-12
Mean ReIoInder.

In silence" "Benham-"If they keep
Mrs. Benham-"Some women suffer
silent they certainly suffer"
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1919-03-12

AS without oil the best engine is use
ess, so without friendship society is
4 sham.