The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1919-10-23

cook sca,loped potatoes and spaghetti
in"
please, man," b egan the aged hero
in appealing tones, as he stood Ut the
kitchen door on wasbday, 1--WE lost
my leg" well, | amt got it,
snapped the woman, slamming the
door.
Those cranberry producers who fear
that the big crop will cut into their
profits ought to start . story similar
to the raisin story, that q cranberry,
dropped into bottle Of near beer
and left for certain number Of days,
will do SO and so, etc, etc.
A professional seeker Of inconse-
quentiaI information has at last placed
the blame for the fountain pen. He
says French person named Jean
Benoit Mallat invented it in 1843. SO
the next time one Of the darned things
springs leak in your pocket, you
know who to cuss.
4 4 q
II the story Of the good Samaritan
we're written today it would probably
state that the priest and the Levite
drove by on the other side in their
super-sixes and that finally a Samar-
itan in flivver stopped and picked
up the man who had fallen among
thieves.
Norway went dry by $4,000 major
ity. Well if they don't need liquor
up there where the breath of the Arc
tic is blowing in Scandinavia's face all
the time, we doubt that they need it
anywhere. We half suspect that Carl
Johannesen of Emmett, who is visit
ing in that country, is responsible for
the result.
The jury was evidently getting on
the judges nerves, and at last he an
nounced: 81 discharge this jury" A
tall, lean member of the II then rose.
'Say, judge, you can't discharge mel"
Can't discharge you? Why not?"
Numbered the Judge. WAL replied
the juryman, pointing to counsel for
he defense. 81 was hired by that guy
over there"
A British hero limped into the post
office to lift his weekly 24s. d.,
awarded him by his grateful country
% be squandered on washing and lodg-
ngs and food and clothing. The polite
postmistress apologized as
he offered two crumbled and filthy
Is. notes: II am sorry that have
It clean ones to give you" "Hand
hem over" said the bold Bill. IL
lon't mind; no microbe could live on
ny pension"
Science has again laid heavy hand
pom tradition. In recently issued
realise devoted to the wart it is
tated authoritatively that the hand
hk VI iIokS mas HoIhiHk " W Will
!. Popular belief has sustained no
ach blow since Casabianca and Will
am Tell were declared myths. 1t is
lso interesting to learn that warts
re Catching. The probabilities are
nat If those with whom you play have
arts you will ultimately contract
lem. Truth continues to be as strange
s mystery.
An ignorant man was making q
,eech. He had his notes in the top
ocket of his coat, and everytime he
'anted to refer to the notes he peek
l into the pocket. "Who is the
ather of our country?" he yelled,
nd then he looked into the vest poe
1t, and said, George Washington, of
purse" who liberated the colored
sople." he yelled. He again looked
to the vest pocket, and answered
mself with "Abe Lincoln, Of course"
Who were the three greatest generals
the world war 2" he shouted. Look
e into the vest pocket, he answered
usly: Hart, Schaffner & Mark"
A lady at the picture show ticket
ndow, during rush, opened her
,ndbag, took out her powder puff,
ok out her handkerchief, took out
e babys bottle, and lastly
ok out her purse, and laid all the
Ems along on the window shelf, then
ened up the purse, and counted out
twenty-five pennies for the purchase
three tickets. Then she carefully II
'sed the purse, put it into the hand -
e, put back the baby's bottle. put n,
ok the handkerchief, put back the !.
WIDER puff, closed the handbag,
thered up the tickets, and got into
: show before the first reel was