The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1919-05-09
NO MORE BOYS
"a garden flu II of weeds,
Is like a boy of words,
But not a boy of deedsp

NO MORE BOYS
ooh dear" she said it is too bad!
That boy would make angel mad
And I'm no angel; that know
There now he comes, his feet all snow,
With which he'll track my carpet DER.
And when he goes he'll bang the door
Or leave it just enough aJar,
That when perchance comes in papa
I'll have to hear him fume and scold
Because let the room get cold"
Her neighbor coming in just then
Began to talk about her "Ben."
II never saw his like" she said
THAT boy think would live in bed"
Down street. meanwhile in shop and store.
The fathers this same trial bore. q
Boys sent on errands would be late,
And customers would have to wait;
Perchance, get vexed and go elsewhere.
Such kind of things are hard to bear
What boys are made for don't know
Except it was to eat and grow;
Use UP with dirt and dust their clothes;
And boots and shoes run out at toes;
Good customers of chewing gum,
And loving best horn drum.
In palace or in humble cot
In places cold or places hot,
In city and in country too,
This seems to be the general view.
If dogs are stoned, if cats are killed.
If mk-cans with water filled.
If horses run, will not go,
If some says "Get upr' or "Whoa!"
If girls are teased until they cry
And babies made almost to die
By eating fruit as green grass,
If teachers get their fill of Sass"
In facteif anything is done
That should not be beneath the sun
Or what should be, not done at ALL
The blame is always sure to fall
Without exception the boys,
That should have been their mothers joys,
Their fathers help, their sisters pride,
And lived like angels till they died.
"The man who first invented sleep"
So runs the proverb; "let him reap,
The blessings of the race at large;
But curses let each mortal charge
To him who first invented boys.
Depriving life of half its joys"
PART II
Nineteen hundred and ninety-four.
One day the rain began to pour.
1t raned all day it raned all night,
And when next day, came corning light,
Mrs. Jenkins to her husband said,
",Tis time Tom was out of bed"
well, call him then" "I have" she cried.
"And he has not word replied"
So with a groan the man arose,
But could not break his boys repose.
What can the matter bel" he said
"Pve yelled enough to raise the dead"
The matter? why, the boy was gone.
And SO that father had that morn
To build the fire in the CRATE,
And patiently for breakfast wait;
Not patiently that would be we'll
For boys. as men so aften tell.
But men-how could they patient be
With wood just taken from the tree,
AS green as grass, and crooked too
What could man with such things do? :
Meanwhile. the mother had gone out
To clear the ice from frozen spout.
Slipped on the same, and falling down.
Made noise enough to raise the town.
What did Mrs jenkins say that day?
'Tis understood woman must
Express her feelings or else bust!
Mrs. Jenkins had much to say
In Fact she had much to say.
About the work there was to do.
That when noon came. it was not half through.
That boy I'll fix when he gets home,
So he abroad no more will roam"
Just then her neighbor called to say,
Her boy since had been away;
Her neighbor and her neighbor too.
Indeed, of all that street twas true.
The boys were gone, no one knew where.
And as they did accounts compare
Twas with them al1-"I never saw
So many things to do before"
And while they talked the men came in
Who to their mills and stores had been,
The shutters up. the floors unswept.
Where things of various kinds were kept
No could tell. "The boys" they said
about such things had gone ahead
And kept the track of this or that"
The parson could not find his hat
"Iohn always looked to that" he said.
when il was not upon my head"
What could it mean? No boys in town.
lust then the morning train came down,
Behind several hours too.
For what could even railroads do.
Without the boys their help to wake?
And fires in the stations make?
From far and near the news come in
With silence heard:-,lo noisv din
Disturbed the quiet of that day
When all the bows had run away
While many said with signs and tears
aft thev'd come back-the little dears-
They might make all the noise thew pleased"
And many more their feelings eased.
With lamentation loud and long