davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Alaska daily empire., 1919-08-14

Percy Noodles says that when he wrote the capi- talists daughter at the seashore not to swim ming without skirt and stockings she wired back Do you think I'm going to bring my trunk to the beach?"
The Alaska daily empire., 1919-08-14

And it may be that the who first made two blades of grass grow where one grew before was professional lawn mower.
The Alaska daily empire., 1919-08-14

It has just about got in this country that ii costs man to paint his house than it used to cost him to paint the whole town.
The Alaska daily empire., 1919-08-14

What has become of the old fashioned Southern gentleman who built house with wide hall clear through it and spent the there?
The Alaska daily empire., 1919-08-14

Our observation is that a natatorium is a place for a man to go for the study of astron
The Alaska daily empire., 1919-08-14
Mean Brute!

Mean Brute! "Oh, talk is cheap" sncered Mrs. Gabb
 'Is that so?" replied MT Gabb. Well, many a durn fool has to pay from $10,00O to $5O,000 for speaking just four words" What are the four words?" asked Mrs. Gabb.
 Twill you marry me?" replied MT. Gabb
The Alaska daily empire., 1919-08-14
Gosh

Many man misses a collar when the laundry is delivered But Mrs. A. Cuff is visiting in Piqua, Ohio.
The Alaska daily empire., 1919-08-14
Straininq.

Some funny things come to your
 mind, And we find ono right here; Though you may strain your voice.
 you'll find That it won't make it clear.
The Alaska daily empire., 1919-08-14
Exactly.

Hard luck may give you some hard
 licks,
 But you should grin and mix it. And, when you find you're in a fix The thing to do is to fix it.
The Alaska daily empire., 1919-08-14

(Daas News.) or course, every man ought to be liberal with his wife but there is in giving her enough money to hire divorce lawyer.
The Alaska daily empire., 1919-08-14
BITS OF BY PLAY By Luke McLukf
 -:- Copyright by Cincinnati Enquirer
What's the Use :?

What's the Use? She got tired of reducing her weight, And a seven pound sirloin she eight. She picked at her teeth. And she said with relief: well, now I'm resigned to my
 feight."
 Dam! Where is the biggest dam in the world?" asked Willie. q do not know where it is now, my son." replied Nav But it was in our cellar last night when your Paw dropped the only quart of whis ky he had and broke it."
The Alaska daily empire., 1919-08-14
Boo-Hoo!

Here lies the body of Ignatz Vooze, And his demi5c caused many q
 tear;
 For sixty years he lived on booze. But he expired when he drank
 near bccr-Billic Wood.
The Alaska daily empire., 1919-08-14
Well, That's Nice!

Few Hurt runs q cafe in Tulsa Okla.
The Alaska daily empire., 1919-08-14

Fair Laura Lemon lives near me, And l may be a 'geczer," But sure as fate I'd like to be A reg'lar lemon squcezer.
 Dalton (Ga.) Citizen.
The Alaska daily empire., 1919-08-14
Carrying Coal to Newcastle.

Carrying Coal to Newcastle.
 A. B. Ice, a prominent oil man of Tulsa, Okla, was married to Mar garet Kilcoyne. of Fulsom. w. Va. last week. MT. and Mrs Ice left i'm mediately for Alaska, where they will spend the honeymoon.
The Alaska daily empire., 1919-08-14
Dur Daily Special.

The man who has no business has about the same number of friends.
The Alaska daily empire., 1919-08-14
Etta Gourd lives in Moorcsville, N. c

AW, kwan! I'm very fond of Dolly Dee, She is a peach all right; And though she's right in front of me, l think she's out of sight.
 Luke McLuke.
The Alaska daily empire., 1919-08-14
WuH!

Judson-Was Jenkins upset whoI he heard that his packing house pro fits were being threatened?
 Jeffrcy-Yes, indeed. He shed 9 profit tear.-Ball Crank.
The Alaska daily empire., 1919-08-14
Friend Wife's Ruiscuits.

FrTend WIfe BUISCUItS. He dropped her biscuit with a crack Then said: Now, don't get sore. I'll get tho automobile jack And raise it from tho floor
The Alaska daily empire., 1919-08-14

Names Is Names. Let's knock off and go down to Knoxville, Tom, and see John Sha- yer.
The Alaska daily empire., 1919-08-14

What? What has become of the old-fash- toned nickel that would buy you; A cigar.
 A bottle of pop A soda.
 A shine.
 A beer.
 A street car ride A sandwich.
 A movie show ticket. A pack fo tobacco. Fooey! We have often opened canta loupe that tasted ike something else But what We stared to say was that
The Alaska daily empire., 1919-08-14
TIPS FROM TEXAS

(Dallas News
Omaha daily bee., 1919-06-09
KEEP COOL AND LOOK AHEAD.

Presumably as an aftermath of the war, labor
conditions generally are in state of precarious
instability. Talk of strikes in various lines of
industry is heard on every side, with here and
there strikes actually in progress. The moving
causes are too self-evident to require descrip-
ton, but the conclusion is unacceptable that this
situation will put the cause Of trade unioni1:n as
embodied in the several national and interna-
tional labor organizations, to severe strain
that will call for wise and sane leadership to
meet the test
Although all labor has not been unionzed
nor is soon likely to be, labor has made tremen-
dous progress along the paths bazed by the
unions and has made greater advances in the
FIVE years since the beginning of the world war
than in the Is years preceding. What has been
gained for labor can be held or lost, according
as labor holds fast to the sane principles, or
over-reaches itself. by wild excuses bound to
react.
This is the time for labor, the rank and file
OF the industrial army, as we'll as the officers,
to keep cool counsel and to look to the future
as we'll as the present. 1t goes without saying,
that the same admontion applies to the en-
ployers, individually and collectively
Omaha daily bee., 1919-06-09
No Excuse for Police Outrages.

Regardless of all that may be said or done,
the rules of every we-regulated police depart
ment should secure known and responsible
people from being hauled to Jail in the dark
hours of the night unless arrested in the per-
petraton of crime. There is no danger of
such persons running away; they can be had at
any time would appear in police court when
ever wanted in response to notice served on
them. Dragging responsible people from their
homes in the middle of the night on fimsy pre-
texts savors too much of Russia and the police
ridden autocracies of Europe, and is a practice
that has no place in freedom-lovng America,
where even the meanest criminal has some
rights.
Another thing to be borne in mind is that the
doctrine that the police can do no wrong is a
relic of past era. 1t is no part of the duty
of the head of police department to uphold or
defend the fragrant offenses or palpable mis-
takes of subordnates. Such system spells
license for police officers to commit outrages
and abuse their authority over individuals at
will. assured of protection by the higher ups. A
police organization that holds every member of
it to strict account for vigilant yet common
sense and lawful exercise of his power as a
police officer will alone get along. Against
arbitrary police oppression, no matter where
perpetrated the people will and should always
crV ont
Omaha daily bee., 1919-06-09
The Servant Question Again.

The household servant question we have al
ways with US, and instead of becoming less
troublesome with the ending of the war, it seems
to be more acute not only here but abroad as
we'll. The release of women war-workers is
apparently not sending them back to domestic
employments, or at any rate not to the same
kind of domestic employment that prevailed
before the war. Not long ago we referred to
a report of British commission detailing the
servant difficulties besettng the householder and
suggesting some things needed to be done to
solve the problem. Going at it from another
side, the Y. w. c. A. through its employment
and immigration department is undertaking
practical experiment in London to supplement
its registry for domestic workers by opening
hostel for day domestic workers to be known
as the Blue Triangle Home Service Corps
which, if successful is to be started also in
different neighborhoods, the girls going out to
work in the neighborhood of their hostel. Ac-
cording to the plan adopted, a charge is to be
made to the employer at an hourly rate-l0
pence or 20 cents to start with-to be paid to
the organization, while the workers to have
fixed wage of 80 shillngs, or $3.50 for a
week Of 4S hours, Exclusive of meal times), and
of this they will pay 9l, or S., to the hostel to
cover board, lodging and laundry, use of uni
form, guarantee against unemployment and club
privileges. They will have quarters in the
hostels, to which they will return for meals, and
the use of two workers uniforms consisting of
overall and cap, per week The workers be-
fore being sent out are to undergo an efficiency
test and to have their references checked up
and in addition enjoy course of training under
the superintendent of the hostel.
As an experiment we wish this scheme we'll
1t may turn out satisfactorily in England or
other old world countries that have distinct
servant class, but we have grave doubts as to
its possibility of success in America, where
every one is born free and equal and the
servant of today may be at the head Of her own
household tomorrow.
Omaha daily bee., 1919-06-09

Powerful Master" murmured the
Genie, and a look he flashed at
Peggy filled her with dismay. 1t was a
look of despair-a look that seemed
to beg her forgiveness. Was the
Genie really the servant of Red
Beard? Had he betrayed her in the
hands of the cruel Turk?
princess Peggy shall be gowned
as BELTS the honor am about to do
her" grunted Red Beard. He clap
ped his hands and in a moment
Peggy found herself surrounded by
busy slave girls They lifted her
from the cart and carried her swiftly
to room within the castle.
In the room were dozens of pretty
dresses, each are more beautiful
than the other. There were party
dresses, garden dresses, Sunday
dresses, all in a delightfully."- bewil-
dering array And there were hats
without number and more slippers
and boots than Peggy could count.
Immediately the slave girls began
to deck her in the choicest of the
f1nery. They picked out the very
prettiest of all the dresses, the most
dainty of all the slippers, and placed
them upon her. In almost less time
than it takes to tell Peggy was
CARRIED in the most beautiful raj
ment she had ever beheld.
But she couldn't understand why
she was being so arrayed. Was she
to be a bridesmaid at Red Beard S
wedding? That would be exciting,
Omaha daily bee., 1919-06-09
MUCH IN LITTLE.

After failing many times Italian
engineers have successfully bored an
artesian we'll in Tripoli.
The Union of South Africa an
nually produces between 100000
and 100000 gallons of wine.
The presence of the water auto
matically starts and stops a new
electric pump for private plants.
A recently patented toy soldier can
be made to hold a rifle in several
positions, including that of firing.
The famous collection of butter
flies belonging to Lord Rothschild is
estimated to have cost not less than
100000.
AS a preventive against fire Aus
trian laws require dwellings and
business houses to be built through
out of solid materials.
Great Tom" the chief bell Of st.
Paurs cathedral, in London, is
tolled only on the death and funeral
Of any member of the royal family
or of the bishop, the dean or the
lord mayor.
Canada's position as a fiber pro-
ducing country depends largely
upon two things, namely, the in
vention and use of modern ma
chinery and the proper grading and
standardizing Of the seeds and fiber.
The Pennsylvania Railroad sta
ton in New York City, occupying
eight acres of ground and with ex-
terror walls measuring about one
half a mile, is the most extensive
building in the world constructed at
one time.
Omaha daily bee., 1919-06-09
Famous Astronomer.

Returned Soldier: A soaring aero
plane in the south Atlantic was used
by Prof. David Todd in making OBJ
servations of the solar eclipse 10
days ago. Professor Todd is not a
freak astronomist. His record indi-
Gates thorough training, experience
and knowledge in that field. AS far
back as 1875 he was an assistant in
the United States transit of Venus
expedition. He was chief of the
United States naval observatory
eclipse parties in Texas in 1878, chief
assistant on the United States nau-
teal almanac in 1S7S-1SS1, astron-
omer in charge of the Lick observa-
tory observations of the transit OF
Venus in 1882; astronomer in charge
of the American eclipse expedition
to Japan in 1887, chief of the United
States scientific expedition to West
Africa in 1889, and the head of half
a dozen or more eclipse expeditions
in later years. For five years he was
professor of astronomy at Smith COL
lege and since 1881 he has been pro-
fessor of astronomy and director of
observatory at Amherst college.
Omaha daily bee., 1919-06-09
Responsibility of Suffrage

That the senate would pass the woman's
suffrage amendment was foregone conclusion.
That the states will ratfy the action of congress
goes without saying. With the so-called Susan
B. Anthony amendment within sight of ratihca-
ton, therefore, it would not be bad thing if
all the women's organizations which so
splendidly equipped for socio-political work and
now must have lot of bottled-up energy avail
able, which should start nationwide campaign
to impress on all men, as we'll as women, what
the possession of the franchise means To vote
is not an idle privilege, but serious responsible
ty. For the proper and intelligent exercise of
the franchise under the conditions that exist
today deeper sense of duty should be devel-
oped in all citizens and voters. and the issue OF
consecrated self-dscipline, which will make the
voter, man or woman, competent citizen
when the question of public matters comes up,
is one that the woman sutfragists should take
to heart. Every one is aware how manhood
suffrage has turned out badly at times through
the individual shortcomings OF the voters. since
there is nothing in the nature of miracle inherent
in the mere right to put ballot in box and
unregenerated human nature is not reformed
because it has access to the voting booth, but
may indeed have greater capacity tor political
evil and greater opportunity tor social mis-
chief. The so-called "dilution of the voting
citizenry" of today, by which incapables play
too large part in deciding things which they
have neither the mental capacity to understand
nor the moral training that fits them to pass
upon will be as great, if not a greater problem
after all the states have woman's suffrage than
it is today. But if the amazing ability the
women have shown in managing their campaign
to secure suffrage will now be directed toward
making America safe for democracy" the
phrase goes and the voter worthy of his priv
iege, great and needed reform can be brought
about The women have, indeed, had their
uuvers full of arguments as to the injustice
OF denying them the vote when so many males
who were unworthy of their privileges and in
competent as citizens automatically became
voters on %becoming of age" The women can
easily make over these arguments in
patriotic crusade that will bring it about that
whatever the men may do or be. the women
voters at least will set an example of sterling
competency as cftisens from which the coun-
try may expect nothing but the best results
Philadelphia Public Ledger,
Omaha daily bee., 1919-06-09
e. title cT6AJ' Corner 3

but even as the idea flashed into
Peggy's mind a disturbing thought
came. too. 1t didn't seem right for
Red Beard to marry 10 wives. In
deed it was positively wicked and She
didn't want anything to do with that
kind of wedding.
AS she wondered over this the
slave girls, exclaiming admiringly at
her beauty, led her to full-length
mirror. There Peggy's astonished
eyes saw reflection she scarcely
recognized. 1t was herself, OF
course. but herself no longer little
girl but seemingly grown up into a
lovely and gracious princess. The
dress had completely transformed
her.
Before Peggy recovered from her
establishment confused shouting
from without drew every one to the
window easement. There they be-
held a scene barbaric and thrilling.
From all directions, out of the for
est, across the meadows and down
from the hills were pouring wild
riding bands Of horsenen. At first
Peggy thought they were attacking
the castle of Red Beard, and she
was glad. Then she saw that they
were not foes. but raiding parties
sent out by Red Beard himself. And
each raiding party was bringing
home a captive held in the arms of
its leader. And each captive was
beautiful damsel.
"Ah, ah, ah." softly walled the
slave girls Here come the brides
Of Red Beard
Gin tomorrow's chapter Peggy meets
heroines long known to her by fame.)
Omaha daily bee., 1919-06-09
Peggy DOns Royal Raiment.


Peggy Dons Royal Raiment.
| X lumpety, clattery, clack. went
~ the two-wheeled cart as the
Mighty Bronze Genie spurted down
the rocky hillside and across a
sloping green that led to the doors
of Red Boards castle. Peggy had a
wild notion Of leaping from her
swaying seat and seeking safety in
flight, but before she could balance
herself to jump. the Genie drew up
before Red Beard. stopping with a
jerk that almost threw Peggy to the
ground.
Then Genie dropped the thills Of
| the cart and salaamed low before
Red Beard.
Most Powerful Master. I have
brought to you Princess Peggy Of
Birdland," he painted in tones so
humble that Peggy was even more
alarmed than she had been
before. Red Boards fat, sleepy eyes
suuinted at her in a way that made
her blood run cold, but his face
behind it's mask of fiery whiskers
neither smiled nor frowned. Nor
did he stir. He sat silent while his
lazy eyes looked her over from head
to foot.
"Humph" he finally grunted In a
piggy voice princess Peggy is
young and fair. She may be trifie
thin. but with a little fattening she
will do very nicely"
A cold thrill ran down Peggy's
back. What did Red Beard mean?
Was he cannibal? Was he plan
ming to eat her up?
you have done we'll. my faithful
Genie" continued Red Beard, look
ing at Peggy, but talking to the
salaaming Genie. your reward
shall be a whole gallon of straw
berry ice cream for yourself at my
wedding feast"
you command, I obey, Most
Omaha daily bee., 1919-06-09
%8eeAyMm
&A@w81%
Muny Drug store-Soda Water, Too?

Muny Drug Store-Soda Water, 100!
Omaha, June 6.-To the Editor OF
The Bee: 1 have noticed great
deal in the papers lately about the
improvement Of Dodge street, and
what a big thing it was going to be
for Omaha. Now there is much said
about a 20-story building to be put
up on Seventeenth and Dodge for all
of the doctors to be in one place.
It seems to me that this would be a
splendid time for the newspapers to
get together and put over something
really worth while. Make sure that
grading Dodge street and erecting
this magnificent building will really
be of great value to the people OF
Omaha.
There WILL of course, be a drug
store in this new building, and as all
of the people who buy medicine will
be in the building to see their physi-
clan, they will naturally buy their
medicine at this drug store.
Suppose we took temptation out
of his way by establishing a munich
pal drug store in this building, Sc
when poor folks need medicine, they
can get it. at cost or fair margin
Of profit.
Will your paper take this question
up and start it going? The COM
mon people will be with you and
will call you blessed.
MARTIN F. LARSON,
PAPA Burt street.
Omaha daily bee., 1919-06-09
Bolshevisim's Imminent
COLLAPSE.
Brooklyn Eagle.

All signs point to the collapse of the Dol
| shevist regime in Russia within short time.
| That Lenine will survive the signing of gen.
| eral peace as real power in Russia has been
made more doubtful by developments within
| the past few weeks, inside of Russia and out.
and since only certain kind of peace would
| have been of service to him his prospects are
made worse by the particular treaty the present
! German government is expected to sign.
| 1t has taken time for bolshevism's utter fail
ure to become manifest That it has not come
sooner is due chiefly to the fact that the rest
! of the world was at and that conditions
in Russia favored the continuance OF such an
abnormality as Lenne's dictatorship OF the pro-
letariat." Bolshevism has failed politically and
economically. 1t was morally and financially
bankrupt from the start The last act of the
tragedy has come with the military failure OF
the Red Guard to maintain itself in the face
of resolute action by forces recruited, Tor the
most part, Russian soil.
Bolshevisms economic and political failure
cannot be too strongly emphasized Had Le-
nine succeeded in establishing his system upon
firm basis it would take more than handful
of Firms and Esthonans to endanger Petro-
grad and no army could be sent across Siberia
that would seriously threaten Moscow. The
combined efforts of those actively engaged in
fighting bolshevst troops would be negatived
if Lenne had succeeded in erecting govern
/ ent capable of functonng in Russia i'll such
a way to win the confidence of the masses
of the Russians And he might have set up
such a government if he could have made his
social theories work
Lenine has been absolute dictator of most of
Russia for year and half. He has had every
opportunity for trying out his experiment. He
has tried it and failed. That is the most i'm
portant thing to consider Had he succeeded
the terrorism and the outrages might have
counted less heavily against him. Certainly
it would have taken large armies long time
to dislodge him, even if the European govern
ments had decided upon real campaign against
the bolsheviki.
Since bolshevism has failed in this respect,
it has become comparatively easy thing for
the different forces to advance into Russian
territory. Today the Firms and Esthonians,
supported by Poles and other factions are
within striking distance of Petrograd. In the
north, despite the reported withdrawal of all
allied forces, our own included the Reds in
retreat. And from Siberia the forces of Ad
miral Kolchak the most formidable anti-bol
shevist faction, are marching west over wide
front In view of this situation we may give
credence to the rumor that the bolsheviki
leaving Moscow There is no place for them to
go except to the Ukraine, and even there they
cannot hope long to maintain themselves
Omaha daily bee., 1919-06-09
Hawaiian Romance Shattered.

Taking our information from the popular
songs, we were persuaded that the home of true
romance and unalloyed bliss was Hawaii, where
the beautiful maidens spend all their time strunl-
ming their ukuleles in the moonlight and dane
ing on the beach at Waikiki or elsewhere, clad
only in a smile and skirt of grass Hatred,
malice, sin and the unpleasant things of life,
we were convinced, never entered that paradise.
How shocking, then, to read the statements
of man who filed suit for divorce from his
week!
Instead of dancing and smiling, as we had
been led to believe all Hawaiian girls do she
drank too much liquor and cursed her husband.
Instead of strumming accompaniment to love
songs on her sweet-toned ukulele, she threw a
water bucket at him and sought to kill him
with cudgel.
Alas for romance! The Hawaiians, we fear,
all is told. We have been cruelty deceived by
the writers of popular songs.
Omaha girls, take it from US, can smile just
as sweetly as those of Hawaii and are less given
to killing their sleeping >spouses with large cud-
gels. Happiness abides just as much in Omaha
hills and wales as on the beach at Waikiki
And we'd rather hear an American girl.
modesty alfred pound out jazz music on the
piano than listen to any half-cad Hawaiian maid
strumming her ukuele in the moonlight