South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1919-09-03
CAST OF CHARACTERS

You.
/ The Garage Boss.
Garage Hand.
Your Wife.
Scene: A garage
You (driving a perfectly good car
/ into the garage. Hello
Garage Hand Gin rear of shop
Hello,
You. Can leave this car here
over night?
Garage Hand. What's the matter
with IL?
You. Nothihg's the matter with it,
just want to leave it here
Garage Hand I'll call the boss
/ Hey, there, Guy wants his bus fix
ed
/ Boss (From rear OF shop.
/ What's the matter with it?
You. NOthing's the matter with it..
Boss. I'll be right out
Your Wife. Don't let them do any
! thing 10 it Will you? They're so ex-
pensive
! You. Certainly not
The Boss. Coming forward). Run
I 'er on the turn table.
/ You. Very well.
/ The Boss. No, No, Not that way,
You All right Tell me how you
want ne to go
The Boss. Here. Say. didn't you
ever drive a car before?
You. OF course, 1 have.
The Boss. Look out! You'll smash
that Rolls Royce over there.
You. Suppose you run it in.
The Boss. l guess I'd better. Gets
/ into the car and takes gear shift
/ lever. She's in rotten shape, amt
she?
You No, she's all right. I just
want to keep her here over night
! The Boss. (After driving car on
turn table, Wait till 1 get a socket
wrench.
You. Don't use any socket wrench
on this car please.
The Boss. II won't cost you much
TO find out what's the matter with
her
You. / tell YOU there's nothing
the matter with her.
The Boss. Bring me that seven
| eighths socket wrench, Bill.
Bill. Here you are.
The Boss. Blending over gear
shift lever). l told YOU so.
Your Wife You mustn't do any
thing 10 that car
The Boss. It's all right lady.
/ Busy with wrench. In a moment
! the gear shift lever is taken out and
laid gently TO one side). Now let me
I get a look under the hood Gle
looks under hOod). Valves are jam
med Bill, hand me the three
+ eiEhths socket wrench.
Bill. Here she is.
You. Now please
The Boss. Just a minute. Just a
minute, I wouldn't dass let no car
go out O. the shop in that shape
Hand me the Stilson, Bill.
Bill. Here she is
The Boss (Busy with StilsOnl. =
told YOU so. (In a moment small.
parts OF the engine begin to come
out from under the hood. Bill
gathering them up and depositing
them in a bucket.)
The Boss I'm afraid she's a little
/ wuss off t1an what'n l thought she
was
Your Wife Make him put those
\ things back right away.
You Look here, You haven't got
any right TO take that car apart. I
\ tell YOU T.
The Boss Slow up there. slow up,
\ It's lucky you come in here when
I YOU did. she'd have busted on YOU
( 40 ways i'm another TO mile Bill
hand me the monkey wrench.
/ Bill Here she is.
The Boss Now take these valve
| heads CHanding more parts to
Bid.
You For the love Of Mike. will
YOU please put that car together
again or will call the police
The Boss Sure I'll put her to
/ gether but YOU don't want TO try
/ TO run with the cam shaft busted on
/ YOU. do YOU
You. (Not knowing what the cam
i shaft isl The cam shaft is all right.
The Boss It is. hey? Look at it,
/ OIolds mp a twisted metal rod for
your Inspection.
You Well IL was all right till We
came in here
The Boss t(Deprecatingly) Now
+ don't get hasty. Buddy. You brought
. the car i'm here for me 10 fix. and I
gotta fix IT, amt l.
/ You. I didn't bring il in here for
YOU 10 fix. 7 brought IL in here 10
+ keep over night
The Boss Well. why didn't YOU
say so then?
You haven't I been saying SO for
+ The last FIVE minutes
The Boss ] didn't hear you say
so. Anyway. It's my business 20 re-
! nair cars. We don't store no cars
here.
You. AL night. GIVE me my car.