Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1919-05-01
This and That

went to Ableman and got so full of
robin hop" the local police hoped"
him into the cooler in the city hall.
He had narrow escape from "hop-
ping On the carpet" in a justice
Office and from taking "hippity hop
to the county jail.
Good roads mean work for those de-
string employment, enhanced values
offarms along the way, and more eco
nonlical transportation. Why delay?
x 3. =
There will be a tax on hair restor-
ers after May /. Believe me, not even
the bald-headed man can escape the
federal tax system!
x + *
In case your neighbours chickens
visit your Victory garden, assist them
over the top.
A popular song to be sung in Port
age, Kilbourn Ableman, Plain, Sank
and other places not far hence is sSa-
hara, We Will Soon BE Dry Like YOU"
y * *
Concerning one of the attractions
with the Ringing Brothers and Bar
mum & Bailey shows, the New York
Tribune says:
2 Miss Norwood, it may be explained
is the flirty individual who came to
this country from her secluded haunts
on the banks Of the Nile two years
ago to become the biggest hippopota-
mus in captivity. In spite of The tre-
mendous size of the $4,000 bath tub
just installed for her personal use, it
is the portable variety, and Ne SIS Nor
wood will spend most Of tile hot days
Of her circus travels in its cooling
depths. Her seven tons of flesh sink
out Of sight beneath the water. of The
tub, leaving only her ingle-horned
nose protruding.'
Mote: The reporter who wrote the
foregoing paragraph might proftably
visit the New York zoo.l
= * !.
A News reader came along and sac
a friend told him that Baraboo man
had about come to the conclusion this
paper was opposed to the Irish. Moth
ing of the kind 1t is all punk. No
body is opposed to the Irish. but there
are a few people who hold they will
never be permitted to establish re-
!, public on the Emerald Isle. That is
all there is to the it, Even the people
of Ireland are divided on the matter Of
home rule, republic and remaining as
they are England could not afford to
permit the British Isles to be split to
pieces. If the Irish broke away, per-
haps the Welsh and Scotch woald want
to do the same and there would be a
grand catastrophe. Could the United
: States afford to permit the people OF
: Wisconsin to set up an independent
y government? The South tried it. At
this very moment there are persons in
this country who feel disgruntled be.
, cause there is dry wave coming and
feel like going to Mexico or some 9th
er booze ridden country. These same
people would set up different govern
ment here if they could. Those who
are not clear on this Should read lit.
tie volume written in Ian Hay, clear
: headed Scotchman. Perhaps we may
quote from Hay some day.
y y X
1--WE have entered upon a social
era" Charles NJ Schwab is reported to
, have said recently, lin which the
. aristocracy of the future will be men
who have done something for human
ity and for their nations. There will
be no rich or poor The rich men are
learning this-and | am rich man.
I'm told. But there has never been a
time in my life that had the sense
!; of possession or that my riches gave
me any happiness. 1t is the doing OF
something useful that has made me
happy"
Zone often hears, writes an old
New Yorker, complaints about the
rudeness of manners in New York city
! A little incident that happened to me
recently is to be placed on the other
side of the balance. I tried in vain to
! replace large glass stopper for a
! bottle. finally went into a big whole
sale drug house. hesitated to ask
the busy clerks about SO trivial a
matter At last / spoke to one OF
them. Glass shoppers of that size are
scarce now he said. But perhaps
you could use a large wooden plug
I FL see if can find one for you in
the cellar To my establishment this
man left his desk and went down eel
! lar to accommodate a stranger. He
T soon brought me a wooden stopper
Il don't know whether that will an
swer,' he said, politely, but you are
welcome to it, That mans act off
sets a good many discourtes:es."
y y x
Herbert Grub is building a new
home at the northeast corner of Second
, avenue and Center street. Hon Frank