The Washington herald., 1919-05-18

clared. which you must got to re-
member that beginning the first Of
May IL you would 60 to a soda foun-
tain and say Give me something for
a headache they would give you a
United States Internal Revenue
stamp for which you would got to
pay two cents before they would
even take the cork out of the
Bromo-Asperin bottle" -
What's the difference whether
they tax headache coming or go
ing. Mawrussr' Abe commented.
"A whole lot OF difference" Morris
said. "In the FIRST place. the taxes
which the country used to collect In
one week from people when they were
catching headaches would be more
than equivalent to the taxes which
the country is going to collect from
people curing headaches during the
next ten years. Also. Abe, nobody
thought II was q hardship to pay
taxes on a coming headache. whereas
there will be a terrible howl go up
over the tax on the same article
in the opposite direction"
AT that think these here May 1st
taxes is going to have a good effect
on the American people. Mawruss,"
Abe said, because there's nothing
like taxes to make a man wake up
and take an interest in the way the
government Is being rum"
"A man would got to be an awful
sound sleeper in that respect IL he
wasn't reused up a little by the In
come tax which he has been paying
for the past four or i've years. Abe.
Morris said.
That's only once a year. Maw-
russ" Abe said. but these here May
LIST taxes is going TO keep him awake
$50 days out of the year. People
which thought you was a tightwad IL
you happened TO mention that $780,
10000 of the country's money was
used up in experimenting with aero
planes. Is now going to shrek in
agony every time they buy a three
dollar-and-a-quarter shirt that it's a
shame and a disgrace the way every
little secretary in the Presidents
cabinet is gallivanting half over Eu-
rope on the peoples money. and
they'd probably beef just as hard II
the shirt only cost SIS excepting
that the luxury tax of 10 per cent Is
only collected from the purchasers OF
mems shirts OF the value of 50 and
upwards on amounts in excess Of
50 each. Also. Mawruss. people which
has just paid IS for a bathrobe on
which the tax would be 10 per cent of
80 cents, or 5 cents cash, y under
stand. Is going to say. Couldn't that
feller travel to and from Europe in
one stateroom, the same like anybody
else? Must he got to have a whole
steamboat and they will start right
in to estimate that the cost Of keep
ing a steamboat the size of the
George Washington in commission is
81. .eo.3 3s per diem. and Is 1t any won
der you've got to pay 1-cent tax
on every orange phosphate. under
stand me-"
Some people Is willing to get in
a knock at Mr.. Wilson without even
tax for an excuse. Abe" Morris said
significantly.
'T know they are" Morris replied
innocently." and as for Postmaster
General Burleson, seemingly he
couldn't suit nobody no matter
what he does. Take for instance
them fourteen bombs which was
mailed in New York tn other day.
Postmaster General Burleson has
probably given strict orders that no
mail should b forwarded which was
short even II cent postage stamp
even. the chances is that every one
of them fourteen bombs would have
been delivered and exploded by
now. But suppose that instead of
Postmaster General Burlsson, we
would have had as postmaster gen.
eral some good natured feller which