The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1919-12-18
TALES OF TOWN

- titi 10 eAHJ NiAfHk ~ q aAAi'~g 49,
: fellow Wood ought to be presidential
timber.
Son starts out wearing dads ole
ties and dad winds up wearing sons
old ones.
We're not much Of cook, but we've
seen dandy apple pie spoiled by cut
ting it into too many pieces.
i 1t is said that only 8 million Ameri-
cans carry life Insurance.. "Gwanl
there are that many agents"
It Is probable that the reason they
call It Dame Gossip" is because peo-
pie are too polite to leave off the "e'
1t is said sunflowers make good but
ter, but like other things that make
real butter, they have to be liquefied
by the COW.
The lady was looking for rugs, and
asked the clerk, who was new, for
Administer. "I'll AK him IL | can find
him." replied the clerk.
q q q
According to an exchange, Belle
Aiken has just married in a neighbor-
ing town. Wonder IL she got relief
when she changed her name!
The snow is fine upon the wheat,
it's nice for sleighing in the street,
but judging from the peoples talk,
it's got no business on the walk
According to scholboy, II the JAM
tor doesn't put some anti-freeze mix
ture in the water the radiators in
the High school building will freeze up
The general situation seems to be
pretty well summed up in the confess
sion Of "A negro: 81 sleeps well, and
eats well, but somehow has no desiah
to work"
No man is saint to his grocer. A
customer inquired for brown sugar the
other day, "Sorry," said the grocer,
shaking his head, However, I've got
the raisins and the meal"
Most needed among inventions at
present is pair Of pants that work
going or coming. Then they could be
reversed occasionally and the bag at
he knees pushed out the other way.
Little boys and girls, shun the per-
son who says there isn't any Santa
Claus. Emma Goldman and Alexan-
der Berkman said there wasn't any
Uncle Sam, either. and look at them
now.
Many a man has gone into business
Tor himself because he wanted to be
his own boss and has discovered that
he public demands more of him than J
he most exacting boss he ever worked
or.
The manufacturers wouldn't make Z
hose fancy 500 silk shirts if there +
we're not fellows to wear them, and
you can't expect this country to func-
ion normally as long as so many are 9
hat wild and hilarious. ?
. q t
Hereafter the government win re- r
uire that an emetic be put in hair s
onic. bay rum and "sich" so As to c
ender them nonpotable. If they get s
o putting emetics into the stuff the n
Id timers will take pound of shot f
S chaser to hold it down. &
A woman in state of great agita- 7
ion, called up the other day and con- I
essed that she had inadvertently il
rought the temperature in her home b
D 20 degrees, 2 degrees above the
Maximum allowed by the fuel admin
'tration. And she wished to know a
hat to do about it--open the win m
ows, or what? B
q y
How many children have you, sir ?" n,
Iquired the census taker. "What diff ),
'rence does it make?" replied Old ),
i'll Misgivens, who is blessed with w
olive branches. "If you are figuring n
4 poking fun at me, I'll just say its y
, laughing matter. And if you aim a,
sympathize with me, you needn't. IN
r I'm plumb used to it." tr
well" calculated Mrs. Bill Misgiv- 4,
Is in the midst Of her perusal Of the !,
Iper ut says here that an ordinary !,
ap bubble is only one five-millionth u
an inch thick. That's pretty thin, -
Mt it," "Yep. replied Old Bill. ~
about as thin as young Johns ex- :.
sc that he wants to talk horse -,
rap with me, when he comes over to
t alongside Of Hettie Jane" A.
. . =