The Ocala evening star. [volume] (Ocala, Fla.) 1895-1943, 1919-02-07
HIGH SCHOOL
Senior Class

Class roll: Leonard Wesson, presi-
dent; Loureen Spencer, secretary; Al
len Hollinrake, Tom Wallis. Ruth
Simmons, Marguerite Edwards. Fan
ME Carlisle. Sarah Herndon, Mayme
Smedley, Cevie Roberts, Mamie Hen
derson
Among the numerous attractions is
a one-act comedy. 1.-THE Pious Parson
and the Awful Actress" by noto-
rious high school author.
Dramatic personnel: Rev Abraham
Jackson Pringle, noted minister,
Fred Winer; Miss Bara Burnheart
Jones, a noted actress. Callie Gissen-
daner.
Agony One
Curtain rises showing Rev. Pringle
vainly trying to convert Miss Jones,
who he thinks a heather, altho he is
deeply in love with her.
Parson: You say you have read the
Bible. Well then how do you like it?
Actress: Oh, it ended just like all
the other books. They got married at
last and lived happily ever after. But
really, am very religious. / attend
ed your church last Sunday. While
we were reading the 23rd Psalm one
deaf old lady was walking beside the
still waters while the rest of us were
still lying down in the green pastures.
/ bet / know more about the Bible
than you do. Who was the first man?
p: Why. Adam. of course.
A.: Wrong. 1t was Joshua the son
of Nun (none). When is bill first men
toned in the Bible
p: Why-er-
A.: When Noah sent out the dovs
and it brought the green back. Why
did the whale throw up Jonah?
p: Why, really
A.: Because you can't keep a good
man down. But really think that
whale story is all bunk
p: When go to heaven I'll ask
him.
A.: But if he is not there?
p: Then you can ask him. After.
all Biblical people were a lot like US
moderns. The thirty-five cent hair
cuts drove Sampson to home talent.
And look what it did for him. Sunday
school is great thing; here is boy
and there is girl. What will they be
when they grow up?
A.: Sweethearts.
p: always do the best. I can in the
world. / made seven hearts happy to-
day. / married three couples.
A.: That makes only six.
p: You do not think | did it for
nothing do you? We had swell
wedding feast. They served pigs feet,
but it made me awful sick. You can't
guess what the doctor gave me. It
relieved me right away.
A.: What?
p: Aliens foot ease. The newly
weds are all taking their honeymoons
in large foreign cities.
A.: Where?
p: Zuber, Pedro and Santos. ] al
ways thought you belonged to a
Christian family! Didn't your father
live in fear of the Lord?
A.: think he did; anyway, he al
ways carried gun when he went out
on Sunday. His favorite text was
John 21:3.
p: Why?
A.: John says. 81 go fishing" You
didn't know / have brother in the
army, did you!
p! No. l suppose he kneels beside
his bed every night and seeks guild
ance from above.
A.; No; he has top bunk. He is
officer of the day and so he doesn't
have to be out at night. He is some
soldier. He was promoted from q prI-
vate to a field marshal in only two
months.
p: To field marshal in two
months?
A.: Did I say field marshal? Well
it may have been courtmartlal. | am
going to give party in few days:
What do you think of this scheme OF
decoration, holly leaves and laurel!
p: Why to be frank I would rather
have mistletoe over you. Dearest
I'm afraid I can never convert you,
hut lust the same, won't you become
my wife?
A.: Will you be good to me and let
me have everything my way!
p: Yes, dearest. everything you say
goes.
A.: Are you sure everything ] say
goes?
P: Positively.
A.: Abraham Jackson Pringle.
p: x x.
Censored by the National Purity
League).
Exit parson. Curtain
Note: This is not meant TO be sac
riliceous. This note is for the more
than superconservatlve.
Tom: aMiss Conibear. please let US