The Washington herald., 1919-04-16
DOROTHY DIX.

CONTINUED FROM PAGE SEVEN.
on life. They discovered within them
selves new possibilities, unsupported
sptitudes. undeveloped strength. Many
OF them for the first time found out
what financial independence means.
and the Joy there Is in DONG construc-
tive. worthwhile work, and that ex-
perience took hundreds of thousands
Of women out Of the clinging vine
class forever.
And what Is true of the great world
is equally true OF the little world in
which each OF us lives and has his
being When things are changed, they
are changed, and they can never be
the same agnin no matter how much
we long for II, or how fervently We
try to deceive ourselves that they are.
We can never go back to the status
quo ante. Perhaps IL we remembered
that We should deal more carefully
with out human relationships, and
guard more tenderly those who are
dear and precious to US.
A woman once told me this story.
She said that when she was very
young she married a handsome young
chap who developed into a brute and
a drunkard- For many years he mis-
treated her IN every possible way. and
himself descended lower and lower.
until he reached the very gutter.
Finally, terrific spell OF delirium
tremens frightened him into giving Up
drink. and he said to his wife, Now
I have reformed, and we will go back
TO our honeymoon days, and be per-
fectly happy together"
But, couldn't 20 back" said the
wife. Il could never look at him
clothed and in his right mind without
seeing him filthy. maudlin, sodden
with liquor. When he tried to caress
me shrank from the hand that had
struck me. When he talked of love
IT raised no answering response in my
heart, for he had killed my love and
respect so long ago It was past all
resurrection.
1T was cynically amusing to me
that people seemed to think that
the past could be wiped out, and
We could go on together just like
any Darby and Joan who had always
lived together in mutual love, ten
derness and consideration. Why, j
could no more bring back the love
I used to have for my husband than
could have changed myself from
middle-aged, careworn, heart
broken woman into a gay and
laughing girl again"
This woman's experience will find
Its echo in the memory of every
married person There are no hus-
bands and wives who do not know,
IN their secret souls. that after ev-
cry family spat things are never
quite the same between them They
can never 90 back to the status quo
ants
In the heat OF anger words are
said that rankle in the memory and
Tester there like poisonous thorns
In the flesh. Accusations are made
that are insults that cI9 to the bone.
Criticisms are hurried back and forth
that strip every rag Of vanity from
one. and leave one naked. shivsr!ng
and ashamed. Also anger tears
away every veil OF Illusion that we
have wrapped around a person
No woman cap evers seeus an an
gel to a man who had once seen
her red Of face and furious. bawling
iike fshwifS. No man is ever q
little tin sod 20 a woman after size
has beheld him with all self control
gone. stoEmins and swearing in fu-
tile rage. After these degrading
spsctacles the husband and wife
kiss and make up. but the glamor
OF their romance has gone. Each
holds the other cheaper, and the lit
tie rift has been made within the
lUte that by and by will make loves
music mute il they continue to cusr-
rel
Precisely the same thing may be
said Of friendship. Our friends ara
oisloysl to US, or say bitter things
to Us, or fail US. They seem to think
ti,st they can atone for their Of
fen3c By saying they are sorry, and
can 60 back to the old intimacy.
Never was there a greater mistake.
There will always be the knowledge
o, their faithlessness. You can no
more patch up a broken friendship
without showing the dishguring
place than you can mend Seyres
ynse without showing the crack.
We can never undo what We nave
done. We can never go back to the
status quo ante. Let that terrible
thought make Us careful Of whes
we do.
ICr-risht, lsl9. b the Wheeler Syndicate. Incl