davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington times., 1919-07-26
COOtie, COOtie
Pests in the Industrial World Must Now Compete
With Vigorous Men.

CoOtis is an animal that up and down making
trouble.
British soldiers in the trenches adopted old Scotch
word coote, meaning roughlegged, as trade name for
them, because coolies have irritating horns on their tiny
feet, which scratch the human skin
The cOOtie is not eater. His disturbing appa
ratus is all in his feet
The cartoon on this page is Hal Coffman's idea Of
human cootie,
p, The human cootie is legion in Washington and
throughout the country Here is the way identify him.
He comes to work just few minutes late He can't
find his inkwe his typewriter out Of order somebody
has upset his paste pot the Office boy has tempered with
his papers.
cooler
he grumbles about hard work and low pay.
BE makes errors in his work. because he is watching
the clock instead OF his job And when he makes mistakes
he passes the buck to some else
He is reprimanded, and regales his fellow workers
later with detailed account of how he talked back to
the boss.
When there is extra work to be done he has head
ache date.
He washes his hands several minutes before quitting
time and makes other elaborate preparations to be
able to leave promptly.
When the time is up he is the first man with his hat
and coat
War times were great times in America for human
coolies Shortage Of labor made necessary for employers
to pay many men and women who not worth their
wages.
ANY KIND OF help In labor shortage is better than
none
Now our soldiers have returned from France Good
men, better than they before they into the army
are back the job They have new determination that
comes from added physical vigor.
They willing to work and to fight for promotion
They amenabe to discipline having learned It's value
They don't grumble.s
They are going to make it poor place for the coolies
Over in France coolies in the soldiers garments were
killed by mechanical process, called delousing
In America industrial delousing process is going on
right now.
Human coolies in competition with those who
are eager to get ahead and who realize that effort
IS the most certain road to success.
The coote has interest in the or failure
of his employer provided his pay regularly His
aim is to get much and to give little as possible
but now he must compete with men who have learned
to beyond the payroll Our in France fought with
object in view. They have returned with increased
ability to look ahead of the present They willing to
work hard for long hours.
Your human cootie spends two minutes of every five
trying to find way to get out Of working the other three
minutes.
The wise employer picks the coolies out of his organiz
ton as fast as they show themselves
The artist shows human cootie about to be ficked ont
of the picture by immense hand This the hand of
honest endeavor.
The cootie has been scratching about aimesslv but
itatingly he survives the blow from that finger he
viii now have to scratch hard for living
America doesn't need coolies these days.
The Washington times., 1919-07-26

This is one of the most re-
markable stories / have ever
heard:
RAY MORGAN, farmer and
journalist, says that once a pig
got on top of his house and drank
two gallons of muriatic Scid and
lived.
Just begin to analyze that
and see what questions you win
begin to ask.
The Washington times., 1919-07-26

Over in Philadelphia the other day
I had dinner and supper with RAY
ROBIN, the artist, who told me that
he had been playing q series Of ten
mis- games with FRED c. KELLY, Of
Chevy Chase, to determine the title
OF Worst Tennis Player On Earth.
The title hasn't been announced, nor
even decided.
The Washington times., 1919-07-26
The Wandering Soul.

With grim certainty destiny hurs "
on to age.
Cause It's better for our souls to md
A puIcr world in space.
'Tis better here to burn awhile.
To conquer passion with 4 sniiiA.
To free the soul from sin and ga1itA.
And win the other stage.
=. A BERGDALE
The Washington times., 1919-07-26


Would you believe it? went fish
ing again, and my old, old side KICK,
BILL HOUCKE, went with me- be
did not 60 to war, and as a result
did not omit his weekend fishing
trips during 1918. He told me that
he errgft a big one in 1918, and
pointed out the exact spot. OF
course, it got away like all big fish
do. with hook, line, and sinker.
Houcke did not fish much Saturday.
He Just threw out his line and kept
pulling it in.
Well. finally his line caught a
straw one, and the way Houcke
pulled, dragged, and yelled, I thought
he had a whale. His line contained
a single struggling toad, but Houcke
kept on pulling the stray line, and
much to my surprise, he yanked
five-pound trout into the boat with a
whoop.
After the excitement had subsidized
Houcke then confded to me that it
was the same line, sinker, hooks, and
fish that got away from him in 1918.
Would you believe him?
BILL BRADLEY.
III say that BEN FRANKLIN'S
STATUE at 10th street and Penn
sylvania avenue needs bath, and
Pm still holding on to WILLIAM F.
MAHONY'S check for two dollars to
start a Saturday Night Wash fund
for the old man.
while so much is appearing IN the
newspapers about the high cost OF
living" says a friend, some rents
haze been increased. At least that
is what has happened to the tenants
of the Apartment house at PIT F
street, n. W., whose rents were
threatened to be increased $1,000
ner month. Some of the tenants re-
fused to pay an additional $1,000,
however, and the raise of $500, eff
fective August /, 1919, was made"
Didn't the Salisbury Resolution
get in it's antidote?
The Washington times., 1919-07-26

I see that 27,50O shares Of W. R.
and e. common stock are to be sold
and l hope nobody breaks leg IN
the rush to get it.
The Washington times., 1919-07-26
SLAVS! SLAVS! SLAVSI

DEDICATED TO THE czECHosLovAK LEGION
sYLvASIA AVENUE cHATEAU-THIERR DAY.
The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1916-1920, 1919-01-26
TRADE BRIEFS.

once furniture ana supplies are this
needs OF firm In England
Cardenas. Cuba. offers a favorable mar
ket for the sale OF American iron and
steel products such as rails, plates. bars,
angles and galvanized sheetinE. Three
large machine shops and seundries located
there employ approximately 500 skilled
mechanics.
What Is thought TO be tho FIRST shipment
OF American house building materials ever
sent direct TO Norway has recently Eons
forward.
During 1913 tho United States shipped
almost as many tractors to Mexico as to
all other Latin American countries, Mex
ico's share lacking only thirty-four OF tho
combined total OF the others
Sukkerfabriksn Vestsjaellsnd. a beet SUI
gar factory with head once in Copenhagen,
Denmark. Ia increasing its capital stock
from $3.50. 900 to Ss04 900.
On a rec.nt voyage from San Juan and
Mayaguez. Porto Rico. the steamship Ma
rina Of the Bull-lnsular Line landed over
8. 900 packages of general merchandise at
Dominican ports. These shipments con-
sisted mostly OF shoes. notions. dry goods
and hardware, shipped by wholesale houses
in Porto Rico 70 importers.
The extensive areas OF agricultural land
in Latin American countries offer a rich
neld for the development OF trade In farm
tractors Many of tho estates. comprising
hundreds OF thousands OF acres. still cui-
tivats their crops OF grain. sugar and cot
ton under the old systems. that require
large numbers OF laborsrs and horses
The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1916-1920, 1919-01-26
Happy Results From the Use OF q
ID and q Dash.

Representative KEARSs has started
something, as the saying Is. which is
likely to travel far, cause much con-
troversy, create feelings Of doubt and
sorrow. Joy and triumph. Will the
use Of the word implied thus. 3D."
always cut red tape as nothing else
will accelerate the wheels of circum-
locution for effective work?
The circumstances leading to this
question deserve word OF explana-
ton. The Treasury Departments Blu
reau of War Risk Insurance is sup
posed to pay in certain carefully spe-
Gifted cases allowances to soldiers de-
pendents, also to remit to the bene-
ficiary Of the allowance an allotment,
a designated part Of soldiers pay.
The distinction between allowance
and allotment must be kept in mind !:
the first Is made from funds Congress
appropriated for the purpose and is
made only to person to whom a SOL
der makes an allotment; the latter is
made from money already earned by
a soldier. soldiers pay. money be-
longing to soldier. and, when not
accompanying an allowance, is paid
through the War Department, and a
soldier may send 1t to his sweetheart.
his banker, his tailor on account, his
club for dues. as he wishes to dispose
Of his personal funds.
Representative KEARNs wrote to the
Bureau of War Risk Insurance asking
why a poor woman of his district,
mother Of two soldiers fighting in
France, received neither tho allow
ance the Government had made to
her nor the allotments of their pay
her sons had made ia her. He re-
ccived, rs thousands, tens of thou
sands. of other inquirers have re-
ceived, a QUESTIONABLE which in
The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1916-1920, 1919-01-26

is not without blemish. But, to say
nothing Of Europe, We Americans.
with old Mexico, Porto Rico and the
Philippines in view, may not be too
censorious. When we remember, as
we do wildly, how in 1872 Yokohama
was placarded by the Chinese with de-
nunciatlons of the japanese for yield
Ing to the foreign devils, how they
were called traitors for deserving ORR
entail culture, we refrain from severe
criticism. We recall, too, how in 1874
the message Of Corea was maddening
in Its revllings because Japan had
adopted Western civilization. That
in earlier days would have meant in
slant invasion and war, except that
Japan's wise men were bent on a
policy not Of revenge but of national
reconstruction. Three years later this
determination to be lenient to n weak
neighbor cost her a civil war Of seven
months duration, in which the toll
was twenty thousand lives and one
hundred million dollars. To-day. af-
ter two costly wars in behalf Of Corea
and millions spent on Corca's material
development. japan gives her Prln-
cess NAsHIMoTo to wed the former
Emperors son, now one Of the richly
pensioned princes of the empire. Con-
gratulatlons to both lands and both
peoples.
The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1916-1920, 1919-01-26
The Hydropiane.

When I was turning seventeen
At homo way up the State.
I thought a sleigh and thoroughbred
For speed was something great.
loved to glide along upon
The snow with loosened rein,
But had never pilo.ed
The wondrous hydrop'ans.
I often dreamed when jus. q kid
OF skimming on my sled
Across the white and feathery clouds
That hosted overhead.
Or sliding on In azure spacs.
And now / fesi again
That diazy sxaltation whom
ride a hydroplane.
IT'S like the smoothly running sleigh
without the hampe-ing steed,
It's like the sled OF dreams that spun
Through space at lightning speed.
A whir. a drone. a 6ssh OF spray
That falls IN diamond rain.
I'm of to navigate tho sky
And drive a hydroplane.
The water shimmers far below,
The wind Is wh!stlIng loud.
race the hawk, defy tho gale,
Toboggan down the cloud.
Tho sunoeams in the zenith change
To castle towers In Spain.
I'm out to break a record In
Tho magic hydroplane.
am a brother TO the gods,
1 steer a supsrship,
No rocks or reefs obstruct its COURSE
Obi what a glorious trip.
And when once moro Il comes to rest
Upon tho hesving main.
I'm proud to be the captain OF
A navy hydroplane.
NINA 1RvINo.
The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1916-1920, 1919-01-26
Warning by the Great snider.

Not having received his invaluable
Almanac for 1919, we had suspected
that Professor ALBERT LEE SNIDER,
the eminent meteorological OF Griffin,
Ga. had gone abroad in December
with other great scientists. perhaps
TO report to the peace conference on
future weather conditions in Bohemia
or Bombay. But, Pluvius be praised,
he is still in America and he writes
as neatly as ever and on as many
sides Of the sheet:
ITO THE EDITOR OF The SuN-Sr. You
will find enclosed my weather forecast
for February. which publish In your pa
per SO your readers may be posted on
what kind OF weather is in store for
them. Just tell the readers to cheer up.
as the worst is get 10 come. dor Feb
ruary will be rip shorter: see my
weather forecast for full details. The
coming spring will be a late one.
This coming fall am going to throw
a terrible bomb in the midst OF Griers
Almanac. for my edition will be enor-
thousand copies. Ny almanac will prob
ably have nifty or sixty pages which will
contain poetry. funny pieces and various
things. 1t will be the finest almanac
| in America Professor A. L. SNYDER.
GRIFFIN, Ga. January 20"
Glancing at Snider's Weather Guide
We see why no almanac for the pres
ent year reached US: No Snider's
1919 Almanacs. All sold out" We
must be content with the four page
leaflet devoted entirely to the weather,
; although we miss Professor SSIDER's
dispositions on other things. But
about the January weather. which
some of us may have been too busy
to observe as it went past? The Pro-
fessor says:
| January will be cold. wet and stormy.
but of course there will be SON fair,
warm days. But the general outlook is
for much rough weather for January
Persons in the tropical North may
cr,tic!se this unjustly, remembering
that this has been the warmest Jan
uary since they don't know when. and
! forgetting that in Arctic Georgia the
Sniderian forecast may have been
coming out to T. In his prediction
for February the Professor is specific
as to some regions:
Look for a big. sweeping cold wave
about the lIth or 18TH. Great cyclones
may be looked for out IN the Western
States and heavy transforms on old
Georgia soil This winter will be SO
cold that somebody will think that Rob-
ERr f. PEARr has left open the door to
the north pole
The Kansas City prophet, n. A. y.
GROVER, has Informed us that the
winters back will be broken by the
middle Of February, Take your
choice. according to whether you wish
to 90 to Florida and fish or stay up
North and golf.
The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1916-1920, 1919-01-26
A RUSH TO CANADA.
Exodus Of Reasonable Drinkers to
the North Is Suggested.

To THE EDITOR OF THE SuN--Sfr: There
is a country bordering on our own from
the Atlantic to the Pacific. kindred
country having tho same language ana
similar laws, but where the laws are so
administered that the murder rate aver
ages less than one-tenth of that of the
United States: a country that Is also
rich In natural resources and offers many
attractions to the man of business and
to the home seeker-Canada, the Land
of Promise!
Is II not certain that unless tho SUI
preme Court puts quietus on the be-
trayal OF democracy that has been per-
petrated by cowardly lobby ruled politi-
clans who mlsrepresent the people; Is 1t
not certain that the effect of forcing
universal and Interchangeable prohibition
without the consent of the people will
induce hundreds of thousands of those
of our citizens to whom personal liberty
10 n highly priced possession to leave
the country and make their home in
Canada? That such an exodus would
occur seems unquestionable. 1t would
be begun by the wealthy and well to
do---a class that Canada would be quick
to wclcome-and II would be continued
by multitudes of mechanics and others.
There are millions of sober and Indus
trious workmen who enjoy their daily
beer and believe that 1t benefits them,
even as the richer man regards his wine.
To deprive them of this liberty without a
vote Of the people and without the pos
sibll,ty Of remedy, they would bitterly
resent. These would follow into Canada
The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1916-1920, 1919-01-26
poEMS WORTH READING.



Nearing San Salvador, the steamers prov
Filings brilliapt orange seaweed on Its
Such iusty growth as chesrsd columouss
eyes,
Weary of watching for the far new world
Its tangle, meshed across the Indigo
OF this suave deep, Is fligree OF gold
1nlaid on glowing lapis lazuli
Vast In the eastern heaven, lustrous domes
or cumuius cloud return the fervid sun
In sheen Of ivory and butternut.
The mighty buiks with fold on topping
fold.
Poised Ger the mirror OF the placid sea
That nying-nsh etch with their dartins
trails,
Seem built of some confection. creamy
smooth,
To melt their honey al the Furnished gulf.
or are the bright cloud forms tho massy
flesh,
Yet delicate and dimpled as a chihs,
OF calm olympians. re-breasted. fair.
That scan their peariy re6ex In the sea!
In sulien contrast on the western sky
Rise iivid shapes of nimbus. like the threat
or smoke that mushrooms from volcano
mouths.
And wrap the sea beneath their pillarsd
murk
Pm mournful puppies of profounder gloom.
And yet along the far horison's rim,
Where beyond view the linked Bahamas
lilo,
Through the drsb fringe OF showers sun
bursts thrill,
Piercing the sombre hansings OF tho storm
Until they shine like dazzling arrases.
Abiaze with silver OF celertial looms.
ELIOT WHITE
ON RoARD STBAMsUIr CAnRILLo.
The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1916-1920, 1919-01-26
The Sun Calendar
THE WEATHER,

For eastern New York, cloudy TODAY
probably rain In south and rain or snow
In north portion; clearing tomorrow
not much change In temperature; fresh
south and southeast winds.
For New Jersey. cloudy, with probable
rain, to-day. tomorrow fair, not much
change in temperature; fresh south ana
For northern New England, cloudv ,,a
warmer to-day. probably followed Nv rain
or snow by tonight: tomorrow clearing.
For southern New England cloudy 10.
day. probably followed by rain to.nor.
row clearing: moderate temperature, fresh
today prosaby ' fkd Ss y raS 5i'n 10y
morrow fair: moderate temperature.
Is passing east over the great lakes ana
another ~ n,s di, ~ Is passing n9rthcss
During the last twenty-four hours thsr.
we're we're rains in the south Atlantic and Gult
north Pacihc coast. There were heavy
rains in south Louisiana, southern Miss.
ssiippi,, Alabama. Georgia and northw,s,
Temperatures remain decidedly abov.
the normal ma IN 81 Psrts e. the county
southern Rocky Mountain region.
The indications are that the weather
VIII pc untettIeu, with rains SUNDAY and
fair Monday throughout the Atlantic
States
Tho weather will be generally fair Sun.
day and Monday in the region OF the great
lakes, the Ohio and lower Mississippi va &.
leys and the east Gulf States.
Mild temperature for the season will
continue over the east half of the country
during the next forty-eight hours. and
probably longer. Storm warnings are dis
played on the Atlantic coast and south ~
Cape Hatteras and on the east Gulf Of
Mexico.
The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1916-1920, 1919-01-26
In tho Tents OF the Sun.

sing tho song of a planet
Old. and very old!
That had been born. and lived, and died,
And had grown dark and cold.
For am outworn scion
Cleft from another Star
And was not born In the tents OF the Sun
As his other children are.
was hither and thither driven.
whirling and lost in space.
Whom the Sun. with his great arms cap
turing mo.
At his own hearth gave plaoa
With his rudy brood he placed ma
The wanderer and forlorn;
And he made no difference IN his tents
'Twixt me and his own blood born.
So I stand mid his flaming cohorts
with his shining light on my brow.
Whose heart was ASH OF another FIFE
Long and long ere now
Think ye do not love him,
In his tender and matches gracs7
But there comes the dream of a long lost
Light
And the call OF my vanished Race.
NJ. 4. BuHLEl
The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1916-1920, 1919-01-26
be ma6e more accurate than they have
been. In his words:

be ma6e more accurate than they have
been. In his words:
Nothing but tho facts will help the
farmcrD or any other class in the ma
ton. 1mpressonistlc studies are highly
likely to be misleading"
The subject Is Of vital interest to
everybody. In the past eighteen
months all of us learned how utterly
dependent we are on the farm. The
tiller of the soil stood with the rifle
man In the trenches; had the farm
crops failed, the soldier would have
failed too. If agriculture collapses all
Of us will fall In its ruin. Conse-
quently. the collection and intelligent
Interpretation Of farm crop costs is q
matter that concerns every dweller In
the land; and great many persons,
farmers and non-farmers, will wonder
why the Department Of Agriculture
has failed to install a system that will
bring out the truth.
The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1916-1920, 1919-01-26
Keeping Books on the Farm.

In their struggle with the milk dis
tributers the dairymen revealed to the
public a new system Of cost deter
animation which completely justified
their demands. OF course, the distrih
uters do not accept 1t as sound. The
consuming public has not attempted
to fathom Its mysteries, and frankly
does not understand II. To the man
who pays the price all farm account
Ing systems are mysteries and agri-
cultural statistics are suspect.
Nor do those acres of figures that
how from Government printing
presses, orderly though they are in
arrangement and exhaustive of farm
conditions though they advertise
themselves to be, enjoy a higher re-
pute in one place Of their creation.
Secretary HoUsroN made n speech on
January Z before the Association Of
American Agricultural Colleges in
which he confessed that he was "by
no means satisfied with the work OF
the Federal Department Of Agricul-
lures Office of farm management re-
lating to studies of costs of farm
crops" The statistical product of the
Office on this subject made in the war
called forth particular condemnation
from the Secretary. The innocent
public had swallowed 1t. however.
Like any other honest worker the
farmer Is entitled to fair return on
his Investment and for his labor. He
must keep the soil he tills fertile; ho
must keep his buildings in good con-
dition; he must pay himself and his
helpers for their labor; he must pay
interest on the money he has put up.
The difficulty Is that nobody knows
how TO figure the numerous items nc.
curately and good many farmers do
not try to figure them ut all. These
are poor farmers, poor in tho sense
that they are inefficient, likely to be
poor In pocket Yet who can blame
them for pursuing their calling N
ignorance II the officials OF the De.
partment of Agriculture admit that
their system of computing costs is
unsatisfactory?
Secretary HousroS says "precise
cost figures for each unit producer
cannot be obtained. but he hopes lie
averages the Department deals in ma )
The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1916-1920, 1919-01-26

Official announcement from Wash
fngton advises the more than 10000
900 American people now in the grip
OF high cost food "a follows:
sniildness of tho winter has resulted
IN the saving in this country OF approxi-
tnately 100000 tons OF fodder s.uffs.
which can b sent to European neutrals
IN the form of oil cake and oil cake
meal. the War Trade Board estimated
to-day after consultation with the Food
Administration. Dairy herds in Europe
owing to a scarcity OF fodder. and this
has been largely responsible for the
shortase In fats. Food Administr alton
officials believe that the fodder savings
will be of great benefit to the people of
Europe"
In this country meats have been in
urdinately high and are still high be.
cause Of an insufhclency of fodder OBJ
ealnable at reasonable price to feed
and fatten live stock for tho tables Of
American consumers.
In this country milk and butter and
cheese have been Unfortunately high
and still are because Of an INSULT
cheney of fodder at reasonable prices
to maintain the dairy herds
In this country poultry has been in.
ordinately high and still is because Of
an fnsufticiency of grain at reasonable
prices to feed chickens and ducks and
geese. For the same reason eggs
have been and are inordlnately high.
1t has been. and still is. lack Of
cheap fodder in our own markets
which has kept up. keeps up and can
go on keeping up the cost Of living. 1t
is because of this that wages, in the
effort to get high enough to buy bread
and butter, rise and rise; and as they
rise they lock the wheels Of industry,
threaten to tie up production and I'M.
poverish the nation.
Wherefore, when a mild winter has
given us 100000 tons Of extra fodder
which might be used to provide food
and bring down the cost OF living for
the American people, let us, to be
sure, shoot it across the seas for any,
body and everybody but ourselves!