Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1919-07-14
The OTHER ANGLE.
H0bble Skirts.
BY KIRK MILLER.

Everybody has contributed toward
making the world safe for democracy,
but nobody's doing anything to check
Soon as one atrocity gets thoroughly
Cancelled from the atrocity menu up
pops a new outrage, worse than the
last. After that fine job Of reducing
the Hun to murmur, it seemed as
though the world was romping along
and we could call ourselves a rational
nation. but no more'n peace becomes
a legal fact a new menace to civ
ilization looms up on the horizon big
ger than the odds against the coun-
try ever going wet again.
Gentlemen, we refer to the hobble
skirt!
Women's styles flop from one ex-
IRENE to the other in this peace
freckled universe of ours, but unless
somebody hops to the rescue, the
gigglipg set will never recover from
the wiggle-skirt epidemic, which ar
rived here just about two jumps
The modern dress isn't made by
a modiste-it's made by a cooper.
During the war days the southern
extremity of lady's uniform was
fashioned wider than a whales lips.
so they could make doughnuts and
of the rolling pin. Gowns for war
times were designed along liberal
lines. like the Trotsky-Lenin reign
in the land of the rhubarb. All the
war workers from yeomen CD to
the knights of the knitters' kIub wore
broad-brimmed hats. broad brimmed
smiles and broad-bottomed skirts.
The hats and smiles haven't changed.
but the skirts fit the ankles like a
police cell fits bum. and the dresses
bloom out at the sides, same as the
RIA.
regime of raiment is forced to risk
itself on a city full of feminine
Charlie Chaplins shortfooting it UP
and down the asphalt like the well
known ant on a hot rock. Fair Wash
ington is threatened with growing up
into league Of cinema clowns. walk
ing stick, black derby and all. From
half block off you can't tell whether
they are approaching you in a wig
gle. walk or wabble; all you see is
set of hips gyrating like a walking
beam and trying to keep from get
ting ahead of a complement of feet
| which seemed to be glued to the
pavement.
It's a terribly embarrassing pro-
| cedure for the baritones who meet
the sopranos for Sunday afternoon
stroll up the arid avenue. Just like
a bloodhound promenading with a
dachshund or de Haviland-4 step
ping out with a moving machine
/ They wouldn't invite a ferryboat to
sQuabble across the ocean with the
Leviathan. but still they ask the tax
paying and taxicab-paying depart
| ment of humanity to reduce its
| cadence to the regulation hobble skirt
step. which at high tide isn't over
| three inches and a half. gross.
We feed starving Europe and make
! the seas safe for canoeing. and set
| tie the rune about Fiume and every
| thing; why not slip in a rider to the
| league of nations to make dresses SO
! the shrill set can get out of a crawl
| Sompin' else for the allied council
! to adjust for small nations-of men.
| Women want their hands I'M
shackled so they can vote, still they
insist on Stacking their feet SO they
| can't walk to the polls.
Only thing to do now is to call
| out the home guard.
Time to call for a cold deck or con.
| suit the Humane Society or redraf,
| the ground rules-anythingt to relieve
the worser half who can't gear his
| speed down to the hobble-skirt slide