Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1919-05-27
A WEDDING,

a
(After the manner of a circus barker.
Last night, at the glitterng and gorgeous
home of the brides parents, Mr.. and Mrs. Will
liam Henry, Hicks. 999 Ninth Place, Miss Mary
Gladys Hicks and Adelbert Smithers were
united in the sensational, awe-insp1ring bonds
of matrimony. The wedding service pro-
nounced in peerless and poppy manner by
the Spiritually Rich and Right Reverend Doc
tor Morton S. buds, rector OF the exceptionally
expensive and exceedingly exclusive Saint
oesus-in-the-Ffleds.
The bride entered upon the massive, mus
cular and marvelously moulded arm of her
father, passing through an avenue OF the larg
est, longest and latitudinest tropic palms in
captivity, while the air about was heavy with
the shimmering, seething scent of precious and
overpowering petals of spring ranged in racy
and rollicking array about the handsome and
harmonious Hicks home. An orchestra of four
count them!-clever comic and delightfully."-
daring musicians supplied the mushy and melo-
dious music to which the bridal party modestly
and morally marched. The grand, gigantic and
brobdignagian groom, accompanied by his bald,
brave and best man, ". Percy Smithers, await
ed them at the improvised. but otherwise fault
less, altar.
See the sQlemnly spectacular meeting of the
bride and groom! See the merry and merito-
rious maid Of honor See the four-count them
-beauteous. beamfng and brilliant brides
maidsI See the innocent, infantile. inhnitesi-
NAL flower girl, Miss Teenie Hicks, in her fear
less fascinating but foolish act of scattering
fair, freakish and fragrant flowers in the path
OF n6f SlSIer, the pride! See Lnem A Il L. !
they are ALL INCLUDED, all under one roof!
Ito be continued).
%
WHO is the Fifth street woman, who, wish
ing to break her little girl of the habit of put
ting her fingers in her mouth placed a light
sprinkling of pepper on the child's fingers, and
was soon afterward astounded to hear the
little tot, after licking her fingers. exclaim:
GLIB.
Notice to
NJ. R.: Yes. by all means.
E F.: The poletariat is bowling for queer
monickers Il
Miss O.: To appreciate joke is to show
sense of humor-a most admirable character
istic but to be able to enjoy a pun at ones
mable trait, and one that is-unfortunately-
rare.
E. T s.: Isn't it about time again?
YOUR REPLY SHOULD BE: 'UNFoRTU-N
NATELY ONLY UNDERSTAND
ENGLISH"
Sir: What would you do to a person who
said to you: she uses her private car of her
own" What should l answer? JP.
HORSESHOES lucky? You can't tell John
Hamilton of Chicago that they are. He had a
whole sack of 'em-stolen ones-when cop
caught him.
WE MIGHT IN A PINCH.
Sir: Having noticed it cannot refrain
from calling to your attention the fact that a
headline saying Fraud Denied in Rubber
Deal" seems to convey the impression that
the one making the charge is regarded by the
defendant as having stretched matters slightly
Or wouldn't you mention anything so obvious?
NJ. G. H
LEON Barritt's new book on How to
Draw" should fill a long felt need We have
found ourselves holding many a poor hand
due to lack of knowledge on that subject
'25 Boys Seized for Shaking Dice on Canal"
Chicago Tribune headline
Obviously wet affair.
o. D. X