davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Topeka state journal., 1919-12-25

the sugar, but instead OF the eggs he
had bought lemons. She asked
Didn't I tell you to bring eggs and
sugar?''
Yes. you did, mother" answered
the little fellow, but was AFRAID
the eggs would break, SO got lem
ons."
There is a Philadelphia mother who
is forgetful and knew it, but who is
clever enough to discount this failing,
as rule. Not long ago her small son
was rather indisposed. and the doctor
ordered a medicine to be given at
three-hour intervals.
Did you give Tom his medicine
regularity" the husband and father
asked unhopefully upon his return
home.
Didn't miss a time" the mother
responded with satisfaction.
How in the world did you ever
think of it?" the man asked.
ct didn't; but it was easy 1 Just
told Tom this morning at what hour
he was to take the medicine, and half
an hour before each time he began
wailing that he didn't want to. take
it,
The Topeka state journal., 1919-12-25

From the keynote speech delivered
in the Republican national conference
held recently is quoted the following:
II We go into this campaign on a
platform of economy and efficiency in
public administration. of firmness and
business in our foreign relations, and
OF constructive and practical prog
rcss towards our domestic develop
ment. we shall be Overwhelmingly sue
cessful." This causes the Detroit
News To inquire: WAS there ever a
national party in the history of Amer
lean politics which did not come out
unqualifiedIy for economy and eff
cheney. for frmness and justice in for
eiEn relations and for domestic devel-
opment?" The News's point is well
taken. Probably something more
than platform made up of timezworn
generalities Will be necessary to win
the next election. National elections
frequently have turned on catch
phrases such as ''the full dinner pail" !"
or "he kept US out of war" but the
voters generally recognize the fact
that platforms are built to last only
until the election is over. when they
are forgotten by everybody, including
those responsible for them
The Topeka state journal., 1919-12-25

Speaking of the waste of print
ahops. says the Los Angeles Times,
there is the government printing Of
fee. which turns out more stuff for
the waste baskets OF America than any
other dozen plant combined. There
are hundreds of high-priced men
gathering material and writing PAM
phlets and documents that are read by
no one but the helpless and unfortu-
nate proofreader.
The Topeka state journal., 1919-12-25

Pop was in the setting room hold=
ing his hand to his he'd, and I was
setting on the floor. and pop sed, Now
Benny. far be it from me to ask you to
stop breething or otherwise impairing
your helth, but L have a site he'd axe
tonite and it would give me CRATE
plezzure and comfort if you could get
along with an -absolootly minimum
amount of noise. Do you know wat
minimum meens? fas'..
No sir, does it mean less than usual?
I sed.
Well in this case, it does, sed pop.
And he kepp on holding his. he'd,
and L thawt a vile, and then / sed.
If I just made sounds like diffrent
herds, would that be a minimum
noise, pop?
1t would not, and 1 positively for
bid it, sed pop.
Even if they all was as little as
sparrers and canaries, pop? sed,
and pop sed, / don't care if they're
all as little as f1eez and inflooenza
germs. kindly drop the subjeck, the
very thawt of it makes my he'd AXE
verse.
Yes sir. sed, And I thawt another
little vile. and then I sed. Suppose 1
gave a imitation of 2 clocks striking
IL at the same time. would that be
minimum noise. pop?
Absilootly not, don't you dare, sed
pop.
Well how about jest one small size
clock striking IL all by itself? sed
Not even lady's watch, now for
the love of Peet let's call the discus
sion settled, sed pop. Meening not
to ask him about eny more mimi
mum noises, and I sed, Well jest one
more, pop, sippose I
Suppose you cleer out of heer in
bubble quick time, or elts Suppose 1
dust your pants for you with a min
ninum amount of tenderniss, sed pop.
Wich 1 cleered out.
The Topeka state journal., 1919-12-25

The lawless element among the
N:nsas coal miners appears still to
be in the ascendant since it has pre-
cipitated another strike as a protest
against the enforcement of the law by
Judge Anderson. These miners are
certain TO discover in the end thai
they cannot defy the laws of the coun-
try and get away with it indefinitely
That is something that never has beer
done in this country BY anybody.
The Topeka state journal., 1919-12-25
LITTLE DROPS OF WAIVER.

''Trifles make perfection-but per-
fection is no trifleu"
The greatest body of water in the
world-if it were to dfsappear-would
finally resolve itself into single drop
OF water. Power is the sum total OF
the tiniest atoms of strength. AL
things begin small
Great Journeys are not started out
on royal" roads, but usually thru un-
blasted paths and over roads strewn
with rocks.
At the start. no one gets very far
Not until the last few days of training
does the athlete experience his conf
dence for winning.
The Topeka state journal., 1919-12-25

Attorney General Palmer says that
he has found that s5 and perhaps 80
per cent OF the retailers are honest
and not profiteers within the mean
ing OF the Lever act. That being the
case, what is there for local fair price
committees to do? 1t seems to be
demonstrated that the retailer is a
negligible figure in the kiting OF
prices and probably he would heartily
The Topeka state journal., 1919-12-25

welcome a law such as is proposed by
Mr.. Palmer requiring him to tag his
goods with the cost ices when they
left the manufacturer or producer.
But why all this hue and cry about
high prices? There Is no more suf-
fering than usual and nobody is go
ing into debt for living expenses.
The Topeka state journal., 1919-12-25
THE NEW UNION.

It is announced that movement
has been set on foot for the organiza-
ton of the public. in an effort to
maintain its rights and interests
against all efforts at encroachments
thereon by organized capital or by or
ganized labor.
The organization is to be called the
Peoples League of America. 1t is de-
signed to include in its membership
all those affected by the rising cost
of living. and without organization
back of them to enforce proportionate
increases-not including those already
organized or able to take care of
themselves, such as labor federations.
the I. w. W., combinations of capital,
etc. The claim is that with the scram-
BILE for profits by capital and the in
sistence upon wage increases by labor.
the unorganized middle class is getting
into a worse plight every day. In
this middle class are ministers. teach
ers. writers, artists, actors, musicians,
doctors, bankers and merchants
clerks. store employees, skilled arti-
sans. small property owners and
Among the activities to be under
taken is noted pressure, thru wide
propaganda, on public servants to
compel the real enforcement of the
law and "the enrolment of volun-
teers to replace unjust strikers who
may threaten the existence and COM
fort of the community" The slogan
is: I'VE do not hate capital and we
do not hate labor, but we do hate all
class privilege detrimental to the peo-
pie as a whole, and we intend to fight
it."
The special representative OF the
public at present is supposed to be the
politician. The trouble with him is
that he may be honest, says the Bache
Review, but is usually non-expert-
and may do more harm to the public
than he does good. A recent case in
Oregon is cited by the Review to IL
lustrate this. 1t says: A statute has
been passed there requiring that all
gasoline shall be SO degrees gravity
Baume, to be salable in that state.
Now, all gasoline marketed by the
Standard OIL company outside of Ore
gon has a Baume gravity of approx
cheney can be obtained by the con-
sumner from gasoline of 56 degrees
gravity than from the gasoline regu-
lanly refined and sold in other states.
On the contrary. the gasoline fur
nished in California and Washington,
and elsewhere. gives better results in
power and mileage than the gasoline
which must be especially made for
Oregon. The qTality OF gasoline of
the usual grade (54 degrees) conforms
TO the specifications prescribed by the
United States government in its pur-
chases.
What was in the mind of the Iegis-
lators who put this statute thru for
Oregon? Its effect will be to require
the special manufacture of the gaso-
line sold in that state-and a result
ing advance in price. and the supply
for Oregon will be affected by the fact
that general stocks of gasoline of a
lower gravity will be unavailable for
consumption in Oregon. So that the
legislature, expecting to benefit the
public, has loaded it up with burdens
and inconvenience. Imagine the po-
litica1 mind cropping around for some
method of getting credit with the pub
lie and arbitrarily raising the gravity
from 81 to 56 on the general theory
that nothing is too good for the pub
lic
The Topeka state journal., 1919-12-25

Our record for continuing a war
after the fighting is over is being
maintained. Politicians went right on
fighting the Civil war for years after
the last gun was fired. Politicians are
now maintaining a state of war with
Germany more than year after the
cessation of firing and regardless of
the fact that all our soldiers have
come home
The Topeka state journal., 1919-12-25

Attorney General PaImer's promised
reduction of prices to be brought
about in sixty days has been post
poned. Mr.. Palmer now has fixed
definitely upon January 1 for the big
slump. If everybody should stop buy
ing while waiting to hear the dull thud
of falling prices the attorney general
would be aided greatly in making
good.
The Topeka state journal., 1919-12-25
Moulton Musings
By ROY X. MOULTON.


The Ideal.
Her cheek is like the blushing rose;
Her starlike eyes are fair to see;
Her swanlike neck and Grecian nose
Have surely made a hit with me-
She has two shell-like ears, SO cute,
And hair that's like a golden sheaf.
When I'm near her, I'm stricken mute
Her beauty's quite beyond belief.
She never seems to move an eye
Or make cen one coQuettish sign
When other men are passing by,
And so 1 guess that she's all mine.
She always wears the same glad smile
Whene'er 1 gaze upon her face.
She's OF the kind that's well worth while /;
/ simply marvel at her grace.
I'd like to warm up to TINT girl,
That is a way I've often felt,
But IL did I'd be churi,
For 1 am sure that she would melt,
I love that lady, il you please,
Ny heart is won as ne'er before,
But it's a hopless case, for she's
A wax girl in a dry goods store. ,.s
We see so many papers referring
to the dry wave" that we feel con
strained to rise and ask what sort of
a wave a dry wave is.
In referring to a musical show in
advertently as a muscle" show we
believe one of our esteemed coritem-
porarfes was more or less right.
DIR. Berthold A Baer tells US that
one of the favorite maxims of Lao
TIE, the famous old Chinese phi
losopher, was: He who knows how
to plant shall not have his plant up
rooted" and we can't help thinking
that would be a great slogan for some
enterprising undertaken.
The Topeka state journal., 1919-12-25

The New York Post calls to mind
that the late Colonel Roos evelt. phe-
nomenally strong of body and rugged
OF constitution. once complained that
the amount OF work laid upon him
as president was Infamous" The
complaint most often heard now is
that President Wilson will not let any
body help him.
The Topeka state journal., 1919-12-25

The Grand Rapids Press attributes
the smashing of the. packers to an
aroused public sentiment. AS a mat
ter OF fact the public hadn't a thing to
do with it. The wholesale grocers and
the politicians are responsible.
The Topeka state journal., 1919-12-25

The reason for Hollands permitting
the former kaiser to remain under
her protection is out at last. He is
paying $4,000 income tax into the
treasury OF that country.
The Topeka state journal., 1919-12-25

President Wilson may insist on
serving another term in the White
House in order to be in a position to
take Fiume away from Italy.
The Topeka state journal., 1919-12-25
Dinner Stories

A little boy was sent to the store
by his mother for a half-dozen eggs
and some sugar. When he returned
his mother discovered he had brought
The Topeka state journal., 1919-12-25

The men who robbed a bank in Mis-
souri, Monday probably now are look
ing for a place to buy pound of su-
The Topeka state journal., 1919-12-25
ON SECOND THOUGHT
BY JAY E. HOUSE.
(Trom Philadelphia Public Ledgsr.l

when a golfer" we quote Grant
land Rice, "can play these three shots
IA long straight drive down the mid
die, a high mashie or mashie niblick
pitch to the green and a deadly put
ting touch-he is going to be a diff
cult proposition to overcome"
which reminds US that Walter john
son has nothing but fast ball, and
John D. Rockefeller only couple OF
billion dollars.
Senator Capper's arraignment of the
profiteers. while lacking the merit of
novelty, struck g. responsive chord, in
Nearly every ultimate consumer be-
lieves he is being stung- But he
doesn't know who Is doing it and Sem
ator Capper didn't say.
One of the easiest and most delecta-
Bile of tasks we go on to say, is that
of hurling the Hypothetical javelin at
a purely speculative target.
Tho whispering Post
A-The incandescence Is faint and
not particularly luminous, but. such
as it is. 1t shines for all. If we look
ed for it we should not know where
to find 1t.
C. 1. Cts a good story. but
they've all heard it..
We all have our problems. May We,
for the moment. rest the weight of
ours upon your shoulders? We have
an artistic eye and can pick out love-
ly material, but We have no notions
as to the sizes worn by a lady with
blue eyes and brown hair who il
about five feet and six inches in
| height and who weighs in the neigh
borhood of 160 pounds.
The moral of most of the crimes re-
Gently committed by them Is that the
Workmanship of the women is i'm
| proving. There was a time when =
woman couldn't hit anything but an
innocent bystander.
However, We gather from reading
! them that the most heinous of Ban
Johnson's offenses was his refusal to
/ try his case in the New York news
papers
We note, in the connection, that the
course in civil law has recruited an
| other student. A Philadelphia busi-
ness man has bought the Washington
ball club.
The column responds to the impor-
| tunities of it's friends. We shall not,
| for the present at least, dole the short
| quart of Old Crow now in our possess
| sion to the fishes. We prefer break
( ing the spirit of the law to commit
garded as a sacrilege.
Later on we may decide to comply
with the spirit of the law. II We do
| so. we forestal other applications by
saying the person to whom the work
of destruction will be delegated has
already been selected.
Attempts to achieve zero in futility
are numerous. But we thought then.
and still think, the bartenders who
| went on strike last June approximated
1t.
| While we have never been in SYM
pathy with their views. We can under
tEtand the reluctance of Emma Cold
man and Alexander BeFkman to be
deported to a country where there is
protection neither of life nor of prop
erty and where a state Of practical
i anarchy prevails.
/, Anarchy ceases to be an attractive
doctrine when 1t Is not accorded police
protection.
The Topeka state journal., 1919-12-25
Household Hints
Christmas Menu.
DINNER.

Christmas Menu.
DINNER
Noodle Soup
Roast Goose - Dressing and Gravy
Cranberry Sauce. Chilli Sauce
Potato Croquets. Lobster Salad
Baked Squash. Celery.
Plum Pudding. Pumpkin Pie.
Preserves. Nuts. Fruits
Coffee and Top Cream.
Bread and Butter. Jelly.
The Topeka state journal., 1919-12-25

In many quarters it is being noted
that the supply OF sugar increases and
dimlnishes in accord with changes in
the price.
The Topeka state journal., 1919-12-25

ly; then. add two tablespoons grated
chocolate and stir until melted Set
to cool in individual molds and serve
with the beaten whites which have
been sweetened with two tablespoons
sugar
The Topeka state journal., 1919-12-25

We note, in the connection, that the
course in civil law has recruited an
other student. A Philadelphia busi-
ness man has bought the washington
ball club.
The Topeka state journal., 1919-12-25

However, We gather from reading
them that the most heinous of Ban
Johnson's offenses was his refusal to
try his case in the New York news
papers.
The Topeka state journal., 1919-12-25

The moral of most of the crimes re-
Gently committed by them Is that the
craftsmanship of the women is i'm
proving. There was a time when -
woman couldn't hit anything but an
innocent bystander.
The Topeka state journal., 1919-12-25

Attempts to achieve zero in futility
are numerous. But we thought then.
and still think, the bartenders who
1t.
The Topeka state journal., 1919-12-25

The column responds to the impor-
tunities of its friends. We shall not,
for the present at least, dole the short
quart Of Old Crow now in our possess
sion to the fishes. We prefer break
ing the spirit of the law to commit
ting what seems to be generally re-
garded as a sacri1ege.
The Topeka state journal., 1919-12-25

with the spirit of the law. II we do
SO. we forestall other applications by
saying the person to whom the work
Of destruction will be delegated has
already been selected.
The Topeka state journal., 1919-12-25

Culture and grace crop out in the
pauses of official routine" says one
The Topeka state journal., 1919-12-25

In referring to musical show in.
advertently as a muscle" show we
believe one of our esteemed coritem-
poraries was more or less right.
The Topeka state journal., 1919-12-25

While we have never been in SYM
pathy with their views. We can under
stand the. reluctance of Emma Cold
man and Alexander Berkman to be
deported to a country where there is
protection neither of life nor of prop
erty and where a state of practical
anarchy prevails.
The Topeka state journal., 1919-12-25

we all nave our problems. May we,
for the moment. rest the weight of
ours upon your shoulders? We have
an artistic eye and can pick out love-
~ material. but We have no notions
as to the sizes worn by a lady with
blue eyes and brown hair who il
about five feet and six inches in
height and who weighs in the neigh
borhood of 16O pounds.
The Topeka state journal., 1919-12-25

Anarchy ceases to be an attractive
doctrine when 1t is not accorded police
protection.
The Topeka state journal., 1919-12-25

Which reminds US that Walter john
son has nothing but a fast ball, and
John d. Rockefeller only couple OF
billion dollars.
The Topeka state journal., 1919-12-25

when a golfer" we quote Grant
land Rice, "can play these three shots
"a long straight drive down the mid
die, a high mashie or mashie niblicN
pitch to the green and a deadly put
ting touch--he is going to be a diff
cult proposition to overcome"
Perth Amboy evening news., 1919-11-06
BOUND POLAND?
CAN'T Be DONE
Because the Nation Has No Bor-
ers---MuChU Unsettled
BY HARLOD e. BECHTOL,
European Manager of N. f.. A.

Ia La IA
WARSAW. Nov. 6.-Poland todal
Is a nation without boundaries.
That condition m%ultiplies the new
born republics problems in buildinl
the machinery of government, bust
ness and trade.
On east, west. north and south tn,
peace conference left border question,
hanging in the air. Still they are un.
settled. No one knows when they will
be settled.
Every day of delay and uncertaint,
Is a German day, because the Ger.
mans are In control of the most im.
portant doubtful areas.
The Poles know that they will have
q good-sized state extending out in all
directions from Warsaw, and that's
about all.
To the east Poland stretches Out
into what was Russia-how far no
body knows. Russia didn't attend the
peace conference. For the present
Poland's army has moved out to O
line east of Minsk.
MAYBE POLAND WILL
MEET RUMANIA.
On the south Poland will border or
Czecho-Slovakia, and = perhaps-or
Rumania. But eve the Czech border
Ia undetermined and will remain un-
determined until a plebiscite is held
in Teschen,
Westward and northward, Poland
extends out somewhere into what
was Germany. But there must be
plebiscites in Upper Silesia and in
southern East Prussia before the
boundaries are fixed.
Under these conditions Poland's af-
fairs are In nebulous state. Work on
the new constitution drags. Parlia-
ment finds it difficult to make decis-
ions before 1t knows what the popula-
ton, racial divisions, products, wealth,
size and general makeup of the coun-
try will be.
Under these conditions 1t Is impos-
Sible to arrive at a final intelligent
taxation policy, fiscal policy, tariff and
customs policy, or any other lasting
policy.
On Dec. 80 Poland will take a
census. 1t will cover all districts
under Polish Control. But when
1t fs completed nobody will be
able to tell what the population of
Poland is, because nobody will
know just what Poland is.
Ihat Is an example of the uncer-
tainty and difficulty evident in every
branch of the government, in every
industry, in every business house.
worry ana rear are gnawtng at the
government, at capital and industry,
at labor, at the people.
KNOW THEY'LL HAVE
ACCESS TO SEA
The Poles know that Danzig will
have a Corridor t. the sea" and an
outlet for their products through the
great Baltic port.
The important working arrange
ments, however, are still to be drawn
up, settled and announced by a high
commission which, as this is written,
hasn't even arrived in Danzig.
the Germans are in full
control and 1t is practic aIIv imnos-
slble for a Pole to 60 to Danzip Tn
upper Silesia n East Prussia the
POLES say that the Germans are fore
ing Poles to plebiscite districts with
day. 'ouns
Perth Amboy evening news., 1919-11-06
THIS WOMAN FOUND RELIEF

Men and women suffering from back
len joints, lameness and soreness, will
be glad to read how one woman found
RELIEF from kidney and bladder trouble.
Mrs. G Hyde, Homestead. Mich. writes
II have been troubled with weak kid
neys: and several times in the last ten
years 1 had that terrible backache and
tired out feeling. scarcely able to do
my work. Foley Kidney Pills made me
feel like a new person." For sale by
Barnekov & Petz.-Adv.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1919-11-06
LADIES'! DARkEN
YOUR GRAY HAIR
Use Grandma's Sage Tea and
Sulphur Recipe and Nobody
will know

The use of Sage and Sulphur for re;
storing faded. gray hair to- IT'S nat =
times. She used 1t to keep her hair
beautifully dark; glossy bs,y t anH o a5' that
dull. faded or streaked appearance,
this simple mixture was applied with
wonderful effect.
pvt.dsrewing at home is mussy and
81 IN uatek Nowadays, by asking a.
: drug store for a bottle of Myet vo, I
viii get this famous old preparation,
impToysd by yyb the ssa Ss de of othsr u ip-
On to restore natural color and beauty
to the hair. .
A ~well-knoSn downtown
saws 1t darkens the hair so naturally
and evenly that nobody can tell 1t has
been applied You simply ampen q
sponge or soft brush with 1t and draw
this through your hair. taking one
strand at a time. BY morning the
gray hair disappears. and after an
other application or two. 1t becomes
beautifully dark n glossy.-Adv.