davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Perth Amboy evening news., 1919-04-24

Even IL a tiny baby looks Hike a
monkey lou cam make its mother
mad by telling her that 1t looks Ike
her.
Z You may not believe 1t. But a mar
RED man can quarrel with his wife
by just sitting still and listening.
Better work hard and save your
III If o want to spend old age in
comfort. The chances are that neither
the I. w. w. nor the Bolsheviki will
do much for you.
When Nature fails to give a. woman
all that is coming to her h doesn't
get discouraged. She calls in Art to her
aid. Another great truth is hat one
half of the family expects the other
mixing.
Any time you see an advertisement
for a plain Cook" the betting is that
the male end of the sketch didn't in
sert ii.
A lot of zap State Legislatures seem
to be legislating on the theory that
it is crime to have money or be
wealthy.
Any married woman can tell you
that men are just like roosters. They
do all the growing while the females
do all the work.
Funny how we are all so free in Of
fering suggestions to others when we
wouldn't think of acting on these sug-
gestions ourselves.
We nave often noticed hat the fell
low who has to take time to get his
coat off before he starts to fight ON
the street isn't going to do much fight
ing.
Short skirts are merely another in
dication of woman's inhumanity to
woman. The ones with the knock
knees are trying to show UP the
ones with the bow legs.
A young married oma doesn't
care much how the soup tastes as long
as it looks pretty.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1919-04-24
Public Opinion


EDITOR EVENING NEWS:
| / ave made suggestions before, as
to an aviation field and a boat harbor
and pardon me for also making a Sdg-
gestion for a soldiers ad sailors me-
mortal in the form of a monument.
l do not mean a monument of stone,
as such a monument is too
As the most OF the fighting was done
in France / would suggest a small
Eiffel over" AS there are four ideal
corners for the foundations, situated
by City Hall Park the idea was to
erect an arch spanning right over City
Hall Park, intervening north and south
corners of High street and east and
west corners of Market street. On
top of the arch, a tall tower to be
erected at least three or o N hundred
feet high with an observation
observation post or crows nest,"1
to be fifteen or twenty feet in dame
ter. Above the observation oom
could be a lighthouse.
The observation room to be for the
public Sightseeing, and could also be of
benefit in case of certain troubles aris-
ing in the city. It could be of educa-
where the people of Perth Amboy
could be proud to invite their friends
and visitors. And as an elevator could
be run to the top, a small fee of say,
three cents could be charged.
The observation room could be dec
GRATED with a mark from every diyi-
sion of the army and navy il could be
decorated with small statues or else
enlarged pictures of soldiers and sail
ors from this city who participated
in the world war, their names, rank
and biography.
The whole monument to be made
of iron beams and anglo iron lattice
work.
Here is a suggestion for considera-
tion, as 1t would be a memorial of
France and a benefit to the people of
Perth Amboy. as they would have a
monument we'll worth showing their
friends visitors n strangers coming
to this city. A monument anyone can
be proud of to show as a memorial
to our soldiers n sailors from this
city.
A. T.. OLSEN,
361 Gordon Street.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1919-04-24

WASHINGTON, ID. c., April "a
Before the var no city OF the Near
East, ave Bucharest, so nearly re-
sembled Paris and Vienna in its hec-
tic night life as did Odessa" says a
bulletin from the National Geogra-
phic Society concerning the city re-
ported to be occupied by Ukrainian
soviet troops.
Odessa has hundreds OF sidewalk
cafes, its municipal opera, its palaces
of chance. and its gilded halls of the
half world. It a more than half a
million population, yet Is one Of the
newest cities in Europe. Moscow's
history extends over a thousand
years. hat of Odessa only a little be-
tyond a century.
There il a unique analogy between
lOdessa and the capital city of the
United States. Both were started at
Iabout the same time-during the last
decade Of the eighteenth century
and both were begun because of the
lfar-seeing wisdom of the chief rec
lutives of the two nations.
Perhaps the oldest coincidence is
the fact that they both were planned
| by foreign civil engineers of the same
nation. While Major L'Enfant was
devising the city OF magnificent dis
~tanees' to be erected on the banks of
1.-THE Potomac, Voland, also a French
man, laid but Odessa on the shore of
1.-THE Black Sea. While President
Washington was dreaming into being
the beautiful city which bears hts
name, Czarina Catherine the Great
was sponsoring the upbuilding of a
municipal stepping stone toward the
lchief object of the Russian Bears
stealthy tread-Constantinople.
Like Washington, Odessa was laid
out in the midst of a virtual wilder
ness and swamp. An isolated Turkish
fort, Khaji-Bey, stood on the site of
the present city at the time, 1883,
when it passed to Russia. In early
years of the Christian era Greek col
! onists had taken advantage of the
| Bay OF Odessa.
Until five years ago IA railway
| distance between Odessa and Moscow
| was more than a thousand miles, but
Perth Amboy evening news., 1919-04-24
HATS OEFt

EDITOR EVENING NEWS:
I have witnessed many parades in
New York City, also in Hobeken. my
home, and I have stood alongside of
all classes of men. gentlemen, social
lists, Jews and the Russian Baboon,
the Bolsheviki on Fifth avenue at
that, and when the American flag.
the Red. White and Blue, passed
every man takes off his hat and those
who forget or fail are told their hat
will be Knocked off for them.
The ignorance of some men on
Smith street when the flag passed
them, to fail in paying this tribute to
the national colors is a shame to
Perth Amboy. Kindly instruct the
ignorant through your valuable paper
to C their head in reverence to
the Red, White and Blue in the fu-
ture. and act as a fun blooded Amer
lean instead of a rubberneck.
BLANCHE CULLEN,
Hoboken, N. j.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1919-04-24
Walt Mason's Ripping Rhymes
FISH

The FISH again are in the brook, from distant waters fanng:
spring arrives I always feel a n idiotic longing to go abroad with rod
and reel where other sports r thronging. My wife remarks, ITO
streamlets shore 1 beg that you won't beat it; go. buy canned SAL
at the store, and stay at home and eat it You're always
grouchy al a bear when you come home from angling; the way you
around and swear sets all my nerves a-jangling" 1 know she's
right; the fishing game I ought to call a halt on; rl-never duplicate
the fame of good old Izaak Walton. Twere better far to plant some
spuds. O prune the growing carrot, " gather up M winter dudss
and store them in the garrett. And yet the mighty urge I feel would
make the deadest swab stir; TIL have 20 try to catch an eel, a dol
phin o a lobster. I ought to trim that stately tree, whose life is
plainly failing; but oh. the brook is calling me. and I must catch a
graying. L ought to grind the reaping hook, and toll like thrifty
brothers.; but there are suckers in the brook, and wall eyed pike
and others. So I'll forsake the growing green's, and leave the rhu-
barb dying, and go and catch some canned sardinesys o break a fish,
pole trying.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1919-04-24

n new line, via Bakhnatch.
fBat distance to s14 miles. The steam,
shin distance between ODESSA anu
Constantinople is $50 miles.
From its history 1t Is evfuent Wy
sion city, Mark Twain found the only
Pnssian Things about 1t to be the
shape of the droshkis and the aIess
Of the drivers. He might have men
fioned the giIded domes or q rev
churches There the Russian likeness
ends. -
"a few miles to the north and aasc
to the southwest are three nnn.
~ ,agoons famous for mudbaths, be-
fjeysd n benefit persons with .
atism. govt and skin diseases. me
most popular of these is twenty miles
long. a mile wide, 10 feet deep aho
lies fe feet below n level Oh inc
Black Sea-"
Perth Amboy evening news., 1919-04-24

I1uFSuay, Apf1t "a, 1878.
Copyright. 1919. by the Mcclure
Newspaper Syndieate.)
Mercury and the sun are in beneic
aspect during the hours of business
today, according to a~strology. Later
Uranus n Saturn are adverse.
The morning should be favorable
to dealings with men in high position.
to h seeking of support in ambitious
schemes and the signing of CONNER
ciaI agreements.
1t is a day fairly fortunate for Dip
lomats. but they should not rely on
their Judgement after the Sun has
passed the zenith.
Publicity will be urged as an aid ia
many fields of endeavor not hitherto
depending ON advertising. News
papers will benefit greatly
The stars presage good news this
day. 1emanating from persons in ex-
allied station.
Politics are subject to contradictory
influences during this rule of the
planets. While the Sun seems to en-
courage the seeking of positions and
rewards. Uranus is in an aspect max
ing for party sehisms N personal
criticisms, The sway presages disap-
pointments, envyings and malice
where there should be cooperation
and friendship.
There is a sign read as indicating
! the prevalence of evil reports and SER
ious misrepresentation
This is not a lucky rule for we'd
| dings n low AFFAIRS Men should be
especially analytical of women,s mo-
tives during this planetary govern
| ment.
During the next few weeks there
may be occult infiuneces making for
| forebodings and uncertainties that are
destructive to success and prosperity.
Cheerfulness and optimism should be
| cultivated.
| star until May and the morning star
| for the rest of the year is believed to
be significant
This star COMBINED with Mercury in
the sixth house is held 70 be exceed
ingly menacinE to the public health.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1919-04-24

1t takes = move mans furniture a
to make $500 worth of furniture look
like Is cents.
An e~asy-going plodder gets some
consolation out of the reflection that
il ii wasn't for the little fellows at
the bottom there would be no big Pc
at the top OF the heap.
The = why a man + satisfied
that any time he can raise $4,000 to
boot he can trade Il In Tor a real car.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1919-04-24

You can't push a mule and you
can't null him. As an example Of firm
ness what better do you want. A
mule sure has the courage of his Do
yietions.-Jaeksonviile Times-Union.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1919-04-24

Loupe tells US thai a small boy asst
ed his father where the West End OF
a dog was. and his father wanted to
know why he asked such q question.
WELL" replied the boy. 1T says In
this newspaper that q mad dog was
shot in the West End
Perth Amboy evening news., 1919-04-24
Gosll!

1t is nothing new for a man to fight
justice. But what we started to say
was that Justice Fife has been arrested
in Dayton Ohio.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1919-04-24

'T suppose that my son is making
himself indispensable around your Of
fee ?" said the Proud Father.
Eyes he is replied the Boss. HE
is about as Indispensable round my
ONCE as an 1856 calendar"
Perth Amboy evening news., 1919-04-24
First and Last

We have a Kansas nan in the Club
nemed A. b. Gee. And we have just
admitted Miss x. Y. Zimmerman, OF
Waukesha, Wis.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1919-04-24
What's the Fare to Atlanta?

1918 sedan, driven slightly. lots of
extra equipment, wire wheels, self
starter. hot and cold water, sanitary
plumbing throughout: cost about ST.
100.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1919-04-24

r The old-fashioned man who used to
take his pen in hand now has a son
who takes his typewriter in his arms.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1919-04-24

He married a woman named Dollar
And now she acts just K a
stranger:
Her actions are making him holler
And bet ten cents he will change
her.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1919-04-24

We didn't go to he ooubleyou jay
Bee in his lectures: The Task Before
U.s." but wen bet that he didn't say,
tina the task before US just before we
went to war was to see how quickly
we could crawl under the bed and hide
away so we wouldn't have to do any,
thing 50 unprohibition as to defend
Old Glory when we could spend our.
time and other peoples money in de-
Tending the Milk White Flag.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1919-04-24

Every good band has a few French
horns. But French Gornett is in the
hardware business at Whitesburg, KY.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1919-04-24

Sign on to saloon OF january Getz
in Hamilton. Ohio:
'The 2sth of May is the Last or
January"
Perth Amboy evening news., 1919-04-24

TO your little wife you Should always
be kind.
And see hat she never gets sore:
For when love flies out at the win
dow you'll ind
Aimony walks in at the door.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1919-04-24
Obi
man % asked

"Are you a married MANI" asked
Miss Oldgirl.
sShould say mott" replied Mr.. Old
bach. ..It is my rheumatics that make
me look so sour and grabbed"
Perth Amboy evening news., 1919-04-24
Old Fashioned.

smith is very old fashioned isn't
he ?" said Brown.
"He certainly is" agreed Jones
WHY he still refers to the automobile
as the horseless carriage"
Perth Amboy evening news., 1919-04-24

to South Bend. Ind. and C. A. Seick-
mani
Perth Amboy evening news., 1919-04-24

This problem makes my worries Pile,
Explain it I entrust!oR. WIG
Explain it I entreat;
Why, when a runner runs a mile,
He only moves two feet.
-TuEe Mel pEa
Perth Amboy evening news., 1919-04-24
Firms Is Firms.

Sign on the door of a law firm in Co
lumbus, Ohio:
Moore
Pain
FOSSIL. r. E
Perth Amboy evening news., 1919-04-24

A cheerful optimist is he
always makes a hit with me:
He Is a man who'd like to bet
The best things haven't happened "
Perth Amboy evening news., 1919-04-24
Daily Horoscope
Thursday, April "a, 1913.

THE stars incline, but do not compel"
Perth Amboy evening news., 1919-04-24
Bits of Bu-Pldu
Advice.

By LUKE McLUKE
Copyright. 1919. the Cincinnati
Inquirer.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1919-04-24

When the kaifs close" said Doam;
Well order up a soda then =
Try to blow off the FOAM"
Perth Amboy evening news., 1919-04-24

And when a runners run his race,
He starts in then to fret,
For well he knows he cannot run
And yet he runs in debt.
Hastings (Neb.) Tribune.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1919-04-24

Force OF Habit.
1T win DO hard an Us poor men
Perth Amboy evening news., 1919-04-24

Our Daily Special.
A Wise Man Figures That Every
Gun Is Loaded.
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1919-04-11
STRONG TO CUBS MINERS TIGERS TOMORROW
BLISS READY FOR GAESTART SEASON THE STADIUM

ALL paths VIII lead toward Rio
AGrands park next Monday after
noon at z o'clock when the Fort Bliss
AIl-Stars clash with the Chicago Cubs.
1913 National league champions who
are en- route back home 70 start the
season on April %. with the Pitts-
burg Pirates Practice viii be finished
by the Al-Stars Sunday afternoon,
daily workouts having been the rule
since negotiations for the game were
closed by Lieut. Edward G. Knowles
and secretary John o. Seys OF the Cubs
team The tentative lineup Of the
Bliss team has not yet been selected
but judging from the likely material
reporting at workouts the Cubs viii
face some strong opposition
Erect Grandstnnd.
A Erandstand to accommodate z0oQ
fans is being erected at the park By
the Eighth engineer regiment for use
at this game only. The stand wiz
probably then be sold TO the city
Tor use at Washington park where a
baseball field Is under construction
The Bliss team will not suffer much
from the lack OF pitchers there being
no less than seven twirlers on the
staff They are; Neyland and Reese,
Eighth engineers; Wilson. Seventh
cavalry: lobe, Remount station Sud
darth and Speck. Fifth cavalry.
Has Many Cntchers.
The team Is particularly strong in
backstops who are: Bently, Seventh
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1919-04-11

cavalry Kemp Eighth engineers; Tice
and Marx, SD field artillery
First base viii probably be held
down by Hadiey of the Flfth
cavalry while Pfpkina Of the Sew
enth and MIlnrn OF the Fifth win
be in the reserve.
Rainey. Seventh field battalion. will
cover second and Janslzi, Of the ord
nance depot will be At the third cor
ner. ShOrtstop Is q toss up between
Lauderback. Of the Seventh; Patch, OF
the Seventh. and Gadi and Jensen OF
the Fifth Lieut.. Wynne viii doubt
less be in right field while Locke and
Baker are in the running for the cen
ter garden position. Diaz Of the Sew
enth field battalion and Matthews Of
the Fifth cavalry are left fieiders-
Seventh Ii Victor
In q practice game between the
Seventh cavalry Tompkins Terriers
and the All-Stars Thursday afternoon
the Terriers won out By s 10 IN five
innings Many OF the men who VIII
be picked on the All-Star team 70 face
the Cubs were Seventh cavalrymens
however
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1919-04-11

GONE mighty interesting baseball
y viii be dished up tomorrow sfto'
noon at the high school stadium When
the State school OF Mines and the Hi
Tigers will inaugurate the local sea-
son on the latter's home grounds. AS
the game viii be the initial contest
for both teams and each IS extremely
anxious 90 start with a victory there
is little doubt but that It viii be in
teresting for the full nine innings as
It Is expected TO develop the weak and
strong points OF the rival clubs The
Miners have a slight edge on prac-
tice. having been working out for
some time while the Tigers started
preliminary work Thursday. due to
the late end OF the basketball season
1IuIeahy MEy Pitch
Either Johnny Mulcahy or Emman-
uel Ponsford. both southpaws will
start the game for the Tigers oppos-
ing either O'Keefe or Summers, for
the Miners. This will make the third
year that Mulcahy has been a mem
Der Of the High school team and each
time the work OF this little pitching
star has brought the Tigers up to the
top berth OF southwestern school
teams for the season Ponsfordis reg
ular position Is first base and II is
probable that the tail boy who is such
a crack at throwing baskets in the
gymnasium viii be stationed at the
corner during the first game.
Mines Line Up Strong.
Manager James z. Crenshaw Of the
Miners yesterday afternoon announced
his tentative lineup for the game.
Whitmer viii catch. and either Sum
mers or O'Keefe viii be in the box.
Savage, q member OF last years team,
viii be on first and Herbert viii cover
second Creushaw himself viii be at
the third corner and Viescas at short
Cordova, Sorrels and Concha will be
in center. left and right fields respect
lively.
OKeefe and CrenshavF were
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1919-04-11

both with the team last year. The
Miners are exceptionally well or
gunized and expect 10 bring home
the bacon IN their first game.
Six men remain on the Tiger roster
from last season and viii be used to-
morrow with three men who viii BE
selected from the tryout squad They
are: Cohen. center field Long. short
stop: Alderete, third base; Ponsford,
first base and pitcher; Mckemy. left
field and Mulcahy pitcher. About Is
men have reported 10 the coach for q
tryout on the team and these viii be
weeded out until the strongest pos
slble team has been secured
Need New Field.
The players are handicapped by the
surface OF the stadium which Is very
rocky and makes the judgment OF
ground balls erratic. Efforts are be-
ing made 70 obtain the cooperation OF
the school board and making Il a
first class playing field with green
grass
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1919-04-11
AintHa Grand and Glorious FeeIin? :

= AND T4eRES = FANiLTl
NEXT To NoO VINO Has
A DAUGHTER That PLAYS.
FINGER EXERCISES on Ihe
PIANO AL DAT LONG
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1919-04-11
'SPORTOGRAPHY b -lc7ag2-

A THOUGH never considered q
Z n great star. Shane Collins OF the
White Sex is known as one Of the
most reliable men in baseball He Is
always on the Job and when called
upon Is never found wanting.
Hal Chase has made many a
trip to the trimming camp, but he
looks as EOOd today M he did
when he was the talk Of ball
dom
Branch Hickey. manager Of the
Cardinals. will try out nearly a dozen
college players before the pennant
races begin Hickey always has been
strong for high brow talent
Wladeck Zbyszko. who won the big
wrestling match at Madison Square
Garden recently, Is still nursing
blue eye he says that the head
lock applied repeatedly by Stranger
Lewis put his lamp out or commits
sion. Lewis accepted his defeat in
good sNrit and made no excuses, but
ne declares that in due time he wants
70 obtain another match with the big
Pole. II Earl Caddock returns to tho
game some time before the hot
weather arrives he may be signed to
wrestle Zbyszko at the Polo Grounds
in New York.
irish Patsy Cline's return TO form
has added another prominent member
10 the welterweight division. Cline's
twO-round knockout OF Jimmy Duffy
at Montreal recently shows that the I
New Yorker is as good as he ever
was ana perhaps little bit better. |
Several months ago Cline was serious I
" injured in an automobile accident, /
and for time IL was feared that he I
would never again be able to box Ap-
parently his long rest has done him |
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1919-04-11
Wilde May Make
Trip To Australia

Jack Munroe, who has taken Snowy
Bakers place as manager OF the Stad-
ium, sends word that he has been en-
dCavOring 70 get Jimmy Wilde, the
great English fly weight champion.
and George Carpenter. the French
champion to make q trip to the Antip-
odes, but the prospects are not so
bright at present, as both OF these
stars have big offers In Paris and
London
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1919-04-11
AMERICAN HAS
STRONG STAFF
Of TWIRLERS
Only Cubs, Dodgers and
Giants of Nationals Have
Strong Pitchers.
YANKEES HAVE GOOD
PITCHING TIMBE B

BOSTON. Mass. april ia baseball
ID expert here says that In the Ma
tional league the Chicago Cubs.
Brooklyns and Giants appear to out
class the other teams In first class
pitching material But IN the AmerI-
can league every team has one or
more star pitchers the. pitching
strength OF the Johnson circuit as a
whole, excelling that Of the older
league As a matter OF record the
American league has possessed more
and better pitchers in the last ten
years than the National league.
The Red SoL trimmed the Cubs in
the worlds series last October chief
lT through the efforts Of Pitchers
Nays, Bush and Ruth. The Cubs
used their left handlers, Vaughn and
Tyler, alternately, but the Boston
gtrategists proved TOO much FOR them.
Il Babe Ruth Is played regularly in
the outfeld this year 10 strengthen
the batting OF the Red SoL. baseball
sharps figure that the worlds cham
pions VIII not measure up 10 several
rival teams in pitching skill
Ruth May Get Workout.
In the opinion Of impartial stu
dents Of baseball form the Red Sox
win have 20 depend entirely on Nays.
Bush and Jones 70 carry them along
N me vans ---4 u win 1lLl 70 pc
called On in case one OF the Big
Three should crack under the
strain The Red Sex did not appear
TO excel all Of the other American
league teams on the mound, and It
vii not be surprising u Manager
Barrow s. compelled 10 use Ruth in
the box more frequently than he has
slammed
MnIer Higgins. providing an
q the Yankees b0Emen are in
line BEFORE the championship sea
Son begins here on April ., viii
BE able 10 EhoFT = more fornid-
EbIs staff % hoEmen than the
Red Sex. This assertion O. based
On ne assumption that the
former BostoulanE, Ernie shore
and Dutch Leonard, are able to
Gene back vita their former sf-
WectiTeneEI.