davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1919-05-11

ually blast my hateful environment.
devoutly wished to peel the rind off
organized society, but something re-
strained me. l hate to tell what it
was, but l might as we'll. 1t was a
wide and richly cleaning streak of
chemically pure yellow that extended
clean through me and out on each
side till it touched those garments
worn next the hide. Of course | didn't
call it that. | merely reasoned about
1t like a grown man. | could burn the
schoolhouse, but the principal of that
school was a perfect devil for finding
things out, and in his torture chamber
ne highly favored an old oaken seat
Stat. And l could fire the home. but
maybe that male bourgeois, surviving
IN spite of flames and air gun, would
lead me by one ear to the SMOKING
ruins of once competent woodshed
and do something really fancy to me.
And | saw no reason why the world
should be made more hellish than if
was. So l struggled on amid those
dreadful social and industrial condi-
tons.
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1919-05-11

Have you carefully considered ~
consequences of what you suggest? h,
inquired finally. "'
am not interested in the conse-
quences. All l know and all caro -
know Is that the present conditions arc
intolerable.' A'e
bue wait You know that splend;d
adage: Look before YOU lean" Nou,
you want to remember that | am o;v;no
you employment. Don't forget +h.t
LOT a minute. If it were not for NV
in'elative and my organizing ability
you might have nothing at all 70 do
ana instead of being Respectable
member OF society you might this very
minute be starving to death
"Sindbad, having been reared as q
iaoorlng man, realized that according
TO the way things were regulated there
was good deal in what the other sold
but he made no reply.
4 do not deny you the right 10
better your conditions, young man II
IS your duty to yourself and your fam
'iy to better your conditions in e,,or,,
way possible, but before giving un ono
JOB, you must think about tho newt oro
Now what would you do if should
get off your back and tell Won that Won
are discharged?'
Weli' for awhile I would be CON.
tent to do nothing at ALL
But you could not keen that nv
iong' You would be arrested for lott.
ering or for having no visible means
Of support = 40
Sindoad shuddered, for he had been
taught from childhood to fear the M
lice. ~"
So you see, continued the Old
man OF the Sea, following up his ad-
vantage, so you see that this Is NOT q
one-sided question after ALL
But l absolutely refuse to oo IN
this way insisted Sinbad. NV strenoth
will not permit it,
wen, now l tell you what I'll do
I'm working on little profit sbarin @,
devlce. In few days am cettinq ont
some nice new stock certificates and
l am going to give you the privilege
or buying these at the market prce
and paying for them on the insta]men,
plan. l will make 1t very simple yo,
VIII be put to no trouble at all. | will
simply deduct the proper amount from
your pay envelope every SATURDAY.
night
But. ---- began Sindbad.
iou don't have to let me know
now said the Old Man of tho Sea
Ihink 1t over and we will discusa
the matter more fully the first Of nov,
week Now think we better be push.
ing on. for we have many mllea he.
fore u.s."
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1919-05-11
A Red Of His O,cn

Bless his soul, if Mr.. wilso,,
hasn't found fragrant outcronn;nu
OF Bolshevism right in his own
home, but he thinks he can manaoa
it. This is his story:
"And here, just now, find p,
shevlst in my own home. It's all trro
1hat thing about the sins of the faith
ers. The ardent young Red was with
violence footing his sister. who was
bourgeois for the moment by reason of
possessing an almost bicycle which he
craved. The capitalissic regime camo
down on him heavy. Thereupon he GO
cured a Spartacan grip on the loosely
tied cravat of organized society ana
against the rules of civilized warfare
darned near strangled the government
right there. This outrage reouir;,a
drastic measures, the government ho
came at last reused and suppressed tho
Red revolt in jigtime. And there ware
two definite cuffs on bare leg. ;us+
to show that constituted AUTHORITY
would stand no nonsense.
"Whereupon the wounded Spartscan
stopped crying instantly, glared coldlv
murderous at the oppressor. and said
in cool, clean, terrible tones: III break
your typewriter!'
"And there you are Even in nv own
house-sabotagel What are children
coming to, anyway? And he has never
read line about Bolshevism, | know
because he is horribly uncertain even
on short words like bas and cat and
rat Well, must meet the problem in
my own way, and think can solve II {.
Continuing that he has already
half convinced" the young Boil
shevist that his typewriter was very
necessary to the economic system
OF the Wilson home and that it had
a direct bearing on certain Shet-
land pony very much to be desired.
the writer concludes:
II sometimes think great deal can
be done by education. And l have only
to add that If there should come any
more Of that Spartacan stuff, in spite
Of my best efforts at teaching, l will
know what to do, and do it good and
plenty. And I haven't even thought of
deporting the anarchist. 1t will be
simpler. That sprouting young Red
will be put upside down and spurlos
verspankt. may not have the dialect
right, but know what l mean. And
so will he.
Washington, D. c.. please take no.
tice."
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1919-05-11
Shorty Bursts

Shorty Ulmer bursts forth in wisdom,
and is responsible for the following.
L. All women like to be loved. and
All men love to be liked.
2. Advice for poker players:
The fellow who plays poker
Should take this to heart
His ANTE" and his "uncle~
VIII not be far apart.
8. Mary can truthfully say that Z
am single by choice.
Jack-By whose choice?
4. "ardmaster (to colored PATIENT
Have you pajamas?
colored patient-No. sab; Captain
Blank said had the mumps.-
Ontario Post.
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1919-05-11

way, couldn't the Government take g.
Joke?
"He is handsome wretch, who can
talk about the casual plexus Of the ALL
and write poetry, and do other literary
tatting If he wants to, but heretofore
ne has got his by telling the masses
TO rise up and shake themselves. He
was the worst wolf that ever howled
at midnight until he faced skeptical
prosecuting attorney; then he turned
a refulgent chrome yellow that made
the courtroom like something cloudy
you dimly descry while the west is
still remembering the sun. Trust old
Nature with her protective coloration.
"He will never suffer injury in any
mix-up, legal or otherwise. know lust
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1919-05-11
''C00d M0rning' -

the tone of the initial product. A
paraphrase which is a first class
example of the contents of the first
issue of Good Morning." is con-
tanned under the caption "Giving
Employment" and follows herewith:
"Sindbad carried the Old Man Of the
Sea few miles further on, but finally
as the heat of the sun grew excessive
he halted under the shade of a fig tree
and once again entered protest.
"'Now say, you old duffer, this thing
has gone just about far enough. You've
got to get off,
"The Old Man of the Sea was
thoughtful for moment before reply
ing.
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1919-05-11
The Yello,Uist

He is but one of many types all
too yellow to act" Here is the bow
Mr.. Wilson's editors tab as "the
yellowest yellow yeti:
"Then we have those literary geishas
who write in safe sec'usion and take q
chance on what happens after it is
printed. There is that superstylish
Bolshevist, with safety -first catch,
who the other day told jury he hadn't
meant it that way at all. He admitted
that he might seem to be a Red, but
honestly now he was only pale pink
If you looked at him closely; and, any
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1919-05-11
Cleveland News

Cleveland owes n vote of heartfelt
thanks to Chief of Police Smith and
members of his force for their cour
ageous handling of Thursdays Social
lst-l. w. W-Bolsheviki disturbance. 1t
is probable that their instant and de-
termined action saved Cleveland the
disgrace of some serious outbreak of
red flag incendarism.
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1919-05-11
Montgomery Advert;..r

Let US try the policy of ruthless
ness, within the law, for a while. Let
us see if it is possible to destroy
those who would if they could destroy
us. Let us nail up the doors, wher-
ever found, behind which men and
women contemplate "revolutionss and
high crimes.
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1919-05-11
Il HAY DAY arrived with an
W. accompaniment of inter
a v Il national fireworks by So

IN \
a v Il national fireworks by So
cialists, Industrial Work
ers of the World and the Bolsheviki.
In the United States more than a
score of bombs were discovered in
the mail, riots of soldiers and citi-
Gems versus Socialists or Bolshevists
occurred in New York, Chicago,
Cleveland, Boston and as far south
as Tampa. AS though to make the
programme complete, Francisco
Villa, the arch Mexican rebel, broke
forth again.
In Europe, where since 1890 May
Day has been set aside as the time
for general socialistic demonstra-
tions, there was the usual upheaval
and subsequent subsidal, on the
whole no more serious nor signifi-
cant than in years gone by.
The press OF this country, in a
measure divided in their interpreta-
ton of American May Day demon
STATIONS, are agreed that the spirit
of Bolshevism, if not it's corporeal,
devastating self, is with us. The
Bolshevik movement, they would re-
mind US, is no longer an abstract
dialectic entity; it is here in the
concrete, not greatly, but still here.
Remedial suggestions differ. Those
who believe it should be outmatched
by force differ with those who think
Bolshevism is political plant
tweed" some editors say-that sim
ply cannot take root in the soil of
democracy.
No more ingenious exposition Of
the psychology of Bolshevism has
been advanced than that which
Harry Leon Wilson publishes in
'The Saturday Evening Post" He
links the Bolshevist, wherever or
whenever found, with his counter
part, the dad boy" of school. They
are men with boys minds, danger
Gus, to be sure, since they have not
the mentality that will function for
truth.
In sum, the Red, set forth by Mr.
Wilson's vivid and satiric pen, is
sky-blue thinker. He was once a
Red himself, admits Mr.. Wilson:
Have you little Bolshevist in your
home? Long, long ago knew a nice
old home that had one, and I was it.
And no wonder For the capitalstc |
bourgeoisie had me ground down some
thing cruel. Slave labor in a garden
and at woodpile to crush my proud |
spirit; dcbasing toll compelled at
times even on q Saturday! And foul
mprisonment-close confinement five !
days week in a red brick penal in
stitution under brutal keepers Life /
was bleak with despair.
And so I became a Bolshevist years
and years before you began to see
the word in every headline-and wasn't
it thoughtful of the Russians to pick
out for their sports and pastimes
word that every one can spell?
Yet I didn't go finally over to the
Reds until | had applied the devices
of revealed religion and proved them
impotent. Did | not for one week
on chilled and bony knees pray nightly |
that my red brick prison house would
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1919-05-11

revolution and discord, who have been
ihnaming the minds of the ignorant
ana the vicious be brought to Justice
IL 'here are not jails enough TO hold
them all, more jails should be con
Structed. and if there are not enough
men available to force an obedience Of
the laws, steps should be taken to re-
cruit more.
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1919-05-11
Wichita Beacon

There Is CHASTITY irony in the fact
that the only person who was serious
ly injured by one of these internal
machines was a girl of what the
l. W. W. call the working class" 1t
only goes to show how insane and ut
terly futile and unreasonable are the
tactics of the terrorist organizations.
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1919-05-11
BY the Dozen

Revolutions can never establish
equality and that, the Bolsheviks
claim, is the Ell Dorado thew are
seeking. They might spare their
pains as the writer SAYS:
"Strike off the head Of a ruler ard
a dozen other heads of other rulers
appear. And with freedom to strike
off those other heads there will still,
be no equality. 1t is the one bafflino
puzzle Of human association. that in
eluctable difference between one human
brain and another. Not even in a. world
OF free lootng can there be eoua1itv
That IS the rift within the loot. Some
men will loot better than other man
perhaps more industriously, peyhans
with superior knowledge of values
One Will search closets SYSTEMATICALLY
while another plays some childish
game with the carcass Of the s1air
owner. And the very hottest of these
ldeallsts will refuse to believe that
ne ought to share the proceeds Of his
own individual enterprise with his less
discriminating or less active fellow
so it was, after all, only beau
tlful dream of the child mind that ws
can take from ourselves and still have
fretty soon, | suppose, there will be
another organized society in Russia
put with the same old offensive laws
against murder and burglary, and with
the same old bourgeois leadership
because society must have leaders, as
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1919-05-11
New Orleans Times.Picavun.

We cannot allow May to be made
day for preaching doctrines that
have bred only hatred and strife in
Europe. 1t has stained many of the
European streets and resulted in the
death or manning OF many hundred
thousand victims of agtators who seek
to climb to power through the blood
OF those they have misled and tricked
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1919-05-11
Buffalo Expre..

+. snake is an upright, honest and
courageous member of society when
compared with the type of human that
was responsible for filling the mail.
with bombs designed to bring about
Wholesale murders of jurists, Cabinet
members, officials and public men.
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1919-05-11
The Boston Daily Cloh.

land of liberty must also H. n land
OF respect for liberty. Our legislatures.
national, state and municipal are per-
iec'ly competent to pass all the pro-
tective legislation we require. 1t Is
next incumbent on the accredited off,
GERS of the law to enforce it.
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1919-05-11
Indianapolis News

Clearly it is time for general
cleanup in this country. We have
been much too easygoing in our meth
Gus Every one can now see that those
involved in this criminal campaign are
not reiormers, but criminals of the
most dangerous character.
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1919-05-11

MISTY and mystic gatherings abou.
what may be done If the offence is re
peated will not do. What is needed is
prompt and drastic action, if we wish
to escape the ENGRAVING of this Old
World idea upon our American life
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1919-05-11

pass public school without shudders
OF repulslon, and | am unable to feel
properly glad that l didn't start a
brisk fire under that particular prison.
| don't say | wish l had only say
| am not S, pleased as ! should be
that | didn't. But that never started
the home fire burning l am heartily,
unaffectedly glad. That male bour-
geois would almost certainly have
nailed me. 1t will be seen that | was
more doctrinaire than practical.
was what is called philosophic an
archist. ! could think of lot of bully
things to do, but l was a rotten actor.
"Why, once our local soviet, of which
| was talkative member, a little band
OF idealists meeting in secret back
of some ones barn, planned to abduct
that same school principal and hold
nm IN cave a couple of versts up
back of Liberty Hill until he promised
to be better man. | freely told the
ardent young Reds just how the
scoundrel could be leaped on some dark
hlght, borne to earth, bound, gagged
and carried to our lair; and thought
up lot of good things to do to him
IN the cave-things he would have
remembered all his life even if he lived
TO be very, very old man. The most
that soviet ever did was to despoil the
capltalistic class of a few apples or
melons. And that hardly rose to the
dignity of a peasant revolt 1t was
more like stealing
Il didn't know it then, but what
should have done was to start one of
those radical little papers, something
called The New Dawn or Liberty
or THE Toling Masses For I was
natural leader and too good to do
the actual rough stuff that might have
been found out on me. [ could have
told the others how to do that. those
others that were just plain serfs with
out vestige of the genius of leader
ship. And if | had finally worked the
soldiers and sailors committee of that
soviet up to some bit of direct action
and the bourgeoisie had unreasonable
blamed me for it, couldn't have
crawed gracefully by saying | hadn't
meant anything of the sort, except in
purely academic way? | certainly
could. And the jury would have had
TO disagree, at the very least"
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1919-05-11
The Baltimore Sun

Tue Tree speech Of fools is one
thing: the free use of bombs is an
other. 1t is time to make the red
creed of assassination and bloodshed
Improbable and unpleasant to those
who feel inclined to take it IN.
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1919-05-11
The Kansas Citv Journal

Inc issue seems to be more and
more definitely Joined as between the
forces OF law and the forces of an
archy, between the Stars and Stripes
and the emblem of defiance for which
the Star Spanged Banner stands
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1919-05-11
Russian Infants

Carrying the smile further. Mr.
Wilson finds in Russia the men with
boys minds ready to physically
make the trial to realize his own
ooylsh dreams, as he goes on to say:
"Supposing that no real boys would
ever have the enterprise and the
strength to practise these methods 7
beheld Russia. And there persistinr
children are making of their world
precisely what | wished to make Of
mine. They are free to take OF candy
and toys as they list; free to enter
deserted banks and take loads Of
money. Better still, they have real
printing presses and can print their
own toy money, millions and millions
OF sheets Of it. They make it in auan-
tlty production. What lots of fun thew
must have turning out that wealth.
because money will buy anything, won't
1t? And if you can print lot of
money you are rich, are you not? So
these Russian boys have reasoned.
they get ever so many thrills out of
TINS toy money they print.
and another thrill they have that
was not mine. My world was mae;-
caliy depopulated. 1t never occurred
20 me to save a few school teachers
ana fathers and keep them in a game
preserve. The children of Russia are
ahead of mo there. They not only
RaVe all the fun of burning and Loot.
lng but they can take some GOOD
sharp sticker knives and 60 out and
get fine mess of bourgeois any morn
ing before breakfast. They have on
" ~ march a few vodkas in any d.
raction, and there their game will he
ana they can set the house afire after
they have fixed the inmates right. 7
ADMIT they are having moro fun than
ever did in that lonely world Of
mnc. | suppose by this time there il
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1919-05-11

copperheadism has not been broken:
1t remains in force, and it is deter
mined, no less in time of peace than in
time of war, to transplant terrorism
IN our soil.
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1919-05-11
San Francisco Bulletin

bolshevism is anti social-it is an
archy. 1t is a menace to the ORGANIZED
labor movement.
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1919-05-11
Cincinnati Enou;r.~

For sheer malignity we put the bomb
'hfower. or sender, ahead Of any other
criminal in the catalogue Of evil
minded men.
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1919-05-11

Fight Bolshevism with Americanism
Keep the arteries of our national ,,ss
tree of the poison OF imported treason.
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1919-05-11
Chicago Daily Newa

Great care must be taken to distin-
gnish between lawful exercise of the
rights Of free speech and free assem-
bly, and wilful abuse of such rights
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1919-05-11

hardly Bolshevist home that hasn't
a good bourgeois head mounted over
the fireplace in the smoking room.
"But they are older boys than I
was; physically older. If the condi-
tions under which l lived had kept
me forever a boy, no matter what my
years and physical strength, there
would eventually have been some real
fires and slaughterings and lootings
IN my town, because you can't keep
boys mind in mans body and not
have trouble. That is the kind of
trouble Russia is having. Under con-
ditions that actually were the evil
conditions l thought l endured, the
Russian boy had to stay boy in
mind. Then suddenly he found him
self man in strength, and his boys
mind began to direct that strength
with boys lively imagination"
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1919-05-11

now ne feels. did no waiting rouns
myself when at last got the massas
worked up to throw that stone tbronsh
the church window" ."
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1919-05-11

In dealing with the sReds," molly
coddling is out of place. for tho Bol~
sheyiki understand only the strong srnl
method Of suppressing criminals.
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1919-05-11
Some MAY Day" Suggestions

The remedy for revolutionary
iawlessness is the impartial but firm,
application of the law.
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1919-05-11
Portland Press

IL is time that some OF the radicals
VINO have been sowing the seeds OF
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1919-05-11

even Russia must know by now, and
a leader automatically becomes a bour-
geois. And if this new organization
is flexible enough to permit children
to grow up in mind as we'll as in body
it will be a fairly lasting organiza-
ton"
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1919-05-11
Harvey's Weekly

M :: ~ e; +, t.: : : E; ;::
lea; but the thing is already
mere. What are we going to
do about it?
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1919-05-11

Perhaps the most unsightly flaws
in the Bolshevik scheme are the
persons identified with it. Running
his eye over the types Mr.. Wilson
says:
Let's have a look at some individuals
of our little group Of pinks-our safe
ty-hrst Bolshevists. l think first of q
dear, sweet, amiable old fluff who sits
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1919-05-11
4 Rotten Actor

Looking back am not wholly sorry
struggled. True, I can't to this dav
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1919-05-11
ME latest periodical to join
h the 'little group of serious
r. thinkers" is Good Morn

ing, a weekly publication,
which indicates that it will do it's
serious thinking in terms of self
confessed humor. The first number
OF this magazine appeared on the
streets of New York last week.
It's editors-Artist Art Young
and Ellis 0. Young-in introducing
their offspring to the public take oc-
casion to announce: "'Good Morn
ing aspires to be a citizen of the
world. but that is not quite possible
yet" a shibboleth in keeping with
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1919-05-11
Toledo Blade

The link between pro .Germanism and