South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1919-07-13

now that it is printed we can find
no evidence Of one of them having
reaG it,
The kentucky beauty who pulled
down prizes il Kentucky beauty
shows Is being sued for an absolute
divorce by her rich New York hus-
band. A Leauty show prize winner
- not apt 70 ne a success a. wife in
any mans country. she's a loser
everywhere else.
If We could get the same interest
in a harvester or throsher champion
ship as we can in a wrestling OF
pugilistic championship, We might
get Kansas quiet. anyway.
Patriotism without common sense
amounts 10 nothing 80 II is well
enorgh fer Uncle Sam TO DC always
on guard AGAINST the fools who love
him well but not wisely.
Thanksgiving day is still many
days distant, but personally we aant
10 include among the causes FOL
universal gratitude the circumstance
that the Lord didn't shape the wom-
on according TO the lines Of the az.
fists VINO draw the fashion pictures
If somebody were 10 shove the
Sermon on the Mount suddenly be-
fore bOrah, he would assail it,
Herald Readers Condemn Presi-
dent for His stand Against Italian
Ambitions is the New York Herald
headline. And here are some of the
names of the condemnators: Fran
colini, Marzorati, Pescia de Ferrara
As between America and Italy, these
Americans CD favor italy But the
country is not going to increase that
kind Of American citizenship. sonny.
Perfectly Legal.
Drink 10 me only with thine eyes
And / will drink with mine
Or leave but in the cup a kiss
And III not ask for wine.
MY Heart and Ny Husband" *
The title of Adele Garrison's domes-
/ tic serial. We suppose if MIR. CARR
son were a writer nc would choose
for the title OF his screenings My
stomach and Ny Wife"
We do not think much of trying
Won Rethmann-Ho in place of
the kaiser. If the cause of Justice
is To he completely served we are
inclined 10 think that it viii be de-
sirable TO hang EN- both.
J
| Possibly. the best way to avoid
| talk IN writing mp the doinss of the
''yourser set" is 10 omit names In
/ discussing the years of a girls life
some women find it difficult TO avoid
felinity.
Still there may be other wars and
we must see tia the next one doesn't
catch Uncle Sam in his nigntshirI
and his pants at the pressers.
Marshall county farmers are fnd-
ing biz money il hog raisins. There
| is biz money in hogs for everybody
( except the DOOf leNA9 VINO nave 10
buy bacon and porR 10 eat.
is il dry in Mishawaka q" asks a
South Bend visitor. Dry IN MIsha p
/ waka? Why, man. if you stand out
in one of our famous downpours for
two hours YOU are still so dry that
II you walk mo the White Palace
barber shop YOU Will give the boy
an extra nickel TO dust you off
There is a way TO capture the
bootlegsers and smugglers OF South
I Bend with the goods, but there
seems 10 be no way To safegua the
evidence which is necessary to con-
Wet them.
Those who are foolishly saying that
there is nc freedom left in this coun-
try forget that men are permitted
to vote the republican ticket with
no punishment save the reproaches
which outraged conscience inflicts.
We would not be candid if We did
not confess our regret AT the pasSinc
OF the mince pie. There can never
legally be real mine pies anymore.
All alleged substitutes are hypocriti-
cal and wicked.