davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1919-01-30

glaring at me. Never have I seen
an expression of greater ferocity.
1t was too much. l knew for GER
tain that if he ever lunged at me
I'd never live to draw another yell
low slip.
Mister Officer" l gasped, point
man, don't you think that .he's
just a little too close? I'm afraid
might hurt him by accident"
The officer surveyed the situa-
ton with a swift, practical eye.
"Oh, l guess he can take care OF
himself all right" he replied. That
was just what | feared.
The man smiled grimly.
But does he know that this is
only practice?" l continued. He
certainly doesn't look as if he
did"
That's the way you should
look said the officer, work your
own face up a bit This isn't a
vampire scene. Don't look as if
you were going to lure him.
Y'know you're supposed to be angry
with your opponent when you meet
him in battle, quite put out in fact
And furthermore, you're supposed
to look it"
| regarded my opponent. but on
~ terror was written on my face.
Then suddenly we lunged and eth
er through fear or mismanagement
/ succeeded only in running my
bayonet deep into the ground. In
some strange manner the butt of
the gun jabbed me in the stomach
and | was completely winded. My
opponent was dancing and darting
around me like a local but thor
ough-going lightning storm.
abandoned my gun and stood side
ways, thus decreasing the possible
area of danger. Had the exercises
continued much longer l would
have had a spell of something,
probably the blind staggers.
You're not pole vauIting," said
the instructor to me, as he re-
turned the gun. in a real show
you'd have looked like a pin cush-
ion by this time" l felt like one.
Then it all started over again
and this time I thought l was do
ing a little better, when quite unex-
pectedIy the instructor shouted at
me.
Stop prancing around in that
silly manner" he cried. you're not
doing sword dance, sonny"
"He thinks he's still show
girl" some one chuckled, hes
that seductive"
Mess gear interrupted our hap
by morning. The sight of a knife
fairly sickened me-
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1919-01-30
Advertise Our Greatness.

Stating a plain fact the United States is
the greatest country in the world. Americans
should make it their business to keep it so and
they need not be backward about proclaiming
its merits, either
II this country is to successfully assimflate
the large number of foreign born within its
borders it must make them all citizens. To
bring this about aliens must be given desire
to become naturalized. Citizenship must be
made in fact something worth having and it
must be so advertised
The Chicago judge who refused to grant
final naturalization papers to a Russian who
had been carrying red flag took the proper
course. If that Russians desire to become
citizen is strong enough he will set about learn
ing why he should not carry a red feg.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1919-01-30

/ ed with a second staggerer. It was
a letter from an attorney in his
home town announcing the death OF
a wealthy relative who had left a
large estate in which he was a
beneficiary to the extent OF TWEEN
ty-five thousand dollars.
1t was natural that Walton should
pay exclusive attention for the time
being to this unexpected legacy. He
spent week away from business.
advising headquarters of the fact
The legacy was paid in cash as d.
rected by the testator and Walton
left the executor with a certified
check in his pocket
He arrived in the city at nine
o'clock in the evening. His way TO
his hotel led by the establishment
Of Tyron & Co. His curiosity was
aroused as he noticed light in the
office.
Walton peered through a street
window. Mr.. Tyron sat at his desk
He looked wan, worried, abstract
ed. He was gazing vacantly into
space. Abruptly he stretched out
his arms and his head fell across
them in an apparent state OF col
lapse.
There's trouble brewing, that's
sure!" reflected Walton. Maybe
Mr.. Tyron is H." and he shook the
office door. His employer started
up rather weakly, it seemed, ad-
vanced to the door, made out Wal
ton through its glass panel and ad-
mitted him. Then he unsteadiIy
resumed his seat. Walton sank to
q akaa5Es oanoGits him
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1919-01-30
THE BONUS.
BY T. B. Anderson.

Twice Walton Gresham had met
Miss LueIla Tyron. The first time
he had scarcely Joined in the gen
eral conversation Of a pleasant
chatty coterie of young people. He
was so CENTRALIZED with her gracious
ways and rare beauty that he could
only sit and drink in her loneliness.
She seemed to like him greatly at
their second meeting and Walton
left the elegant mansion of his en-
pIoyer, John TyrOn, treading on
air. That Miss Tyron was beauti-
ful and probably an heiress meant
nothing to him. He loved her for
herself alone.
Then came, not the evaporation
of his lofty dreams, but total de-
moraiization of the same. The
chief clerk in the business estab-
Iishnent OF Tyror G. Co. sent such
a shower of cold water over his as
pirations that they seemed incap-
able OF recovering from the shock.
Hear you've been twice up to
the house OF the boss" spoke this
individual put a peg there. Don't
cross the danger limit"
"'Why, what do you Inean?" IN
eerrogated Walton.
aust this: Three times and ont,
Miss Ty-on Is inclined 10 adhere
to her own preferences, but Mr..
gyIon has hiS7oBsn ideas as to q
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1919-01-30

June 11-This war is going to put
a lot of Cinnamon out of business
if it keeps up much longer. The
first thing a sailor will dc after he
has been paid off will be to estab-
lish a laundry, and he won't be a
SLOUGH at the business at that. I
feel sure that | am qualified right
now TO take in family laundry and
before the end of summer l guess
I'll be able TO do fancy work. At
present l am what you might call
first class laundryman, but I'm not
a fancy laundryman yet. Since
they've put US in whites | go around
with the WaSher-womau'S complaint
most of the time. Terrible shoot
ing pains i'll my back. My sympa-
thy for the dOwntrodden is in
creaSing by leaps and bounds.
can picture myself without any eff
fort of the Imagination bending
over q tub after the war doing the
family washing while my wife is
out running for alderman or pull
ing the wires to be appointed COM
missioner of the docks. The white
clothes situation, however, is seri-
Gus. II seems that every spare mo-
ment I have l am either washing
or thinking of washing or just
after having washed, and to
one who possesses as I do the
uncanny faculty of being able to
get dirtier in more places in the
shortest space OF time than any ten
street children picked at random
could not equal, life presents one
long vista of soap and suds.
You boys look so cute in your
funny white uniforms" a girl said
to me the other day. 1T must be
so jolly wearing them"
June ii have been hard put
today. The Lord only knows what
trials and tribulations will be Wis
tied upon me next. At present l
am quite unnerved. Today l was
initiated into all the horrifying Sc
crets and possibilities of the bay
onet, European style. Never do l
remember spending a more IN
pleasant half an hour. The in
structor was d resourceful man
possessed of most vivid imagina-
ton Before he had finished with
US potential deliCatessen dealers
were lying around as thick as
flies. We were brushing them off,
After several hair-raising exhi-
billions he formed us into two lines
facing each other and told us to
begin.
Now lunge," he said. land look
as if you meant business"
ularonI II, ~
my adversary. He was simply
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1919-01-30
Brad's Bit O. Verse
The MOdern Mand.

IHb MOueIu MAuus
The Quaker poet, good and gray,
sang of Maud Muller raking hay,
put soulful sentiment in his rhymes
that would hardly do for these mod
ern times. No up-to-date Judge
would talk soft gush at sight of a
barefoot maiden's blush. He would
hand her out, with n grace truo
horn, the latest treatise OF husklng
corn, and give her Bulletin Imply
Three on how To cook meals from
microbes free. He would have the
documents there TO show that al
falfa hay is the crop to grow, and
would talk 10 her in n fathcrIy wN%.
on'h0w 10 make hogs and poultry
pay; of the helpful hen and the
stately steer, OF crop rotation and
.armyard gear, OF cholera serum,
OF sheep and kline. and the latest
fdds in the drainage line, Ana
Maud would listen with thanks de-
mure. and homoward hike with her
chinch bug cure; she would put
those bulletins 10 the test, and good
old nature would do the rest Her
brother would get his aeroplane,
her sister would get watch and
Chain; and 20 give this romance
the proper turn, Naud would mar
~ the judge and have wealth TO
burn, GLEN BRADSHAW.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1919-01-30
Hoart GoHOfnQ
|44h55DrObIO1mcC
~ Il MRC. ELIZABETH THOMPSON

Dear Mrs. Thompson: am a
young married woman and l dearly
love my boy husband, but he has
would be correct for me to go out
with boy friend while my husband
is away?
I think quite a bit of this man
and he tells me he loves me.
want little excitement. l would
never be contented TO sit at home.
Please tell me what to do, as
have no one to whom 1 could speak
of such matters, as l am an orphan.
FLOSSIE-
1t would most certainly not be
correct for you TO go with the other
man in your husbands absence.
You must be loyal 20 your husband
II you hope to retain his respect
and faith in you. Without faith
there cannot DO love, and So you
should be very careful not to give
up the thing which means most in
life TO you.
Lack of excitement will be far
better and moro comfortable than n
husband at time when he has
given up so much for you.
Dear Mrs. Thompson: am
troubled with inflamed skin, Can
you recommend anything to use for
this. LITTLE BEAUTY.
The following is a remedy for In
famed skin: Boracic acid, one
dram; distilled witch hazel, two
ounces; rosewater, two ounces,
If this, however, has no effect,
it would be well to consult a ply
stefan, as the blood or stomach may
be in a bad condition, and a local
treatment Will have little effect.
Dear Mrs, Thompson: ! am a
young married woman and am I'M
able to work. During the war
was patient and managed to get
along because at that time l did
work. What can l do to get his
discharge? l., r, S,
Tell your husband to make appli-
cation to his commanding officer
on the ground Of having depend
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1919-01-30

The British find they Will need a million
men in the army for a time even after peace
is signed. Since it is impossible to get force
Of that size by voluntary enlistment it is pro-
posed to adopt some device for selection and
then do everything possible TO make life in the
arm as attractive in the common run Of
other CaIlings. The pay is to be increased,
more frequent furloughs given and diversions
provided for hours when off duty. This Is
NEE ing a situation in a practical way, which
is a fashion the British have that we would be
wise to follow
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1919-01-30
Household Hints
whipped cream Just before servin,

whipped cream Just before serving.
Good Recipes.
Meat and Cabbage RolIs-One
pound ground steak, one cup
cooked rice, one egg, one large
onion, salt and pepper, crisp fresh
cabbage Ieaves. Blend the ingred-
tents we'll and season to taste.
Form the meat mixture into oblong
rolls and roll each into a cabbage
leaf. previously washed and
drained. Fasten with toothpicks,
lay close together in a baking pan
and after adding a cup OF hot
water bake until tender IN a mod
erately slow oven.
Rice Cakes-One cup lice. one
egg. Cook rice in double boiler
until dry. Cool and add we'll beaten
egg. Make into small cakes anc
fry until crisp in hot fat,
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1919-01-30
Tasty Salads.

Potato and Celery Salad-One
quart potatoes, one cupful finely
cut celery, ore-half teaspoonful
mustard. one-half teaspoonful salt,
one teaspOonful sugar, two table
spoonfuls vinegar, two tablespoon
fuls leomargarine or oil.
Wash. boil, skin and cut the po-
tatoes into cubes or thin slices;
mix with the celery and dressing.
One tablespoonful OF chopped
onion can be added; that is mat
ter of taste. Serve on a bed OF
shredded lettuce and garnish with
few pieces OF picked beets;
sprinkle one tablespoonful
chopped parsley over the top.
Baked Bean Salad-Three cup
fuIs beans. one-quarter cupful
finely cut onion. one cupful cold
boiled carrots, cut fine. two table
spoonfuls finely chopped parsley,
two cupfuls finely cut erdiVe.
Line bowl with shredded lettuce.
Mix the beans and onion together,
place in center of bowl: put the
chopped carrots around the beans,
cover with French or boiled dress
ing and sprinkle with chopped
parsley
Dressing for Fruit Salads-In
the top of a double boiler mix two
egg yOlks with one-half teaspoon
salt, dash of cayenne. one-quarter
teaspoon mustard and one table
spoon granulated sugar. add four
tablespoonfuls tarragOn vinegar
and cook over hot tnot boiling
water until thick. Then add two
tablespoons butter q little at a
time, until all is in, Cool and fold
in three-Quartcr cup sweet or sour
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1919-01-30
TattOOing.

| IaJUO0lnRs
ct am a boy 16 years old. belong
ing to club of Is members" type
writes an intelligent reader. we
have all agreed to have the club
monogram tattooed upon our arms.
Several times have been told that
the arm swells from the tattooing.
Please advise me if such report is
true. 1 enclose a stamped. ad-
addressed envelope and hope to re-
ceive an early reply. Your respect
fully"
Boys will be boys. and if they
were not boys they wouldn't be
! boys.
Tattooing on the human skin is
a sorry confession.
Recently l met a fine type of boy,
handsome lad with a straightfor-
ward manner, in short, the type Of
| boy il is a pleasure to know. But
! when he stripped for physical ex-
animation ! was shocked TO see the
| shameful mutilaiOn of his skin,
some fool eagle design tattooed on
an otherwise perfect chest. / felt
almost as sorry for that lad as
would feel if l saw him making n
fool of himself in any other way,
say by taking his first drink or be-
( traying the faith of his mother.
1t is great sport being tattooed,
| if you are a bit defective in the top
story. Frederick All boys are de-
fective until they become old
enough to acquire sense, and many
boys never become old enough for
that.
Yes, the place does swell and
feels pretty sore fr a time. But
you won't mind that nearly as much
as you will regret your fooIishness
later in life.
Tattooing is shameful mutila-
ton in every instance. 1t carries
with it stigma of degeneracy. You
don't see self-respecti men so
decorated. You might find that
kind of art in the wilds of Africa
or TERRA Gel Fuego.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1919-01-30
CIR Rull nf Gnrnt

ported by the commanding general
OF the American ExpeditionarS
Forces: Died in airplane accident,
/; died OF accident and other caus-
es, z; wounded severely, 221. To-
tai, 229.
Died Of Afrplane Accident
LIEUTENANT.
Alexander S. Tarnoski, Chicago.
Wounded Severely.
CAPTAIN.
Francis J. Heraty, Chicago
LIEUTENANTS.
Ward X. lines. Chicago.
Richard Lacey McMunn, Olney,
Ill
SERGEANrs.
Robert W. F'rabel, Dubuque,
Iowa
Edward p. Kilcoin, Harlem, Iowa.
MECHANIC.
George Ships, Catlin. Ill
PRIVATE,S.
Arthur e. Bundy, Springfield, nL
Cecil Cannon, Harrisburg. Ill
James M. Christensen. MOmence,
Ill.
Albert Hamilton. Chicago.
Ernest Kile, Monroe, Iowa
Henry Kirschof, EdWardsville,
Ill
Edward J. Koca, Chicago.
George Kozak, Chicago.
Thomas r. Mahoney, Chicago
Frank Malarich. Chicago.
Albert J. Monsoon. BOde, Iowa
Ernest G. Ocheltree. Clinton, Ia
Ralph Schepp, Chicago.
Frank F. Lamp, Elgiu, IL
John z. Olson, Sheffield, Ill
Moritz r. Reincks, Battle Greek,
Iowa
Harry p. Turner. Chicago.
Glenn W. Williams. Ottumwa, Ia
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1919-01-30
EgEsAISTN TALdA9
BY WILLIAM BRADY rlD.
NoTEo PFtsaAht And uIl1oR

It is easy TO have the tattooiRg
put in, but very difficult, practical
ly impossible to have it removed
without leaving a hideOus scar
However, even q scar is preferable
to the disgrace Of tattoOing.
Just between friends, Frederick,
when a doctor notices tattooing on
an individual he registers a very
uncomplimentary impression OF
that individuals mental and moral
calibre-with the emphasis on the
moral.
What your club needs more than
anything else, my boy, is a raid by
few stern fathers.
And what the professor who
does the tattoOing needs is a long
Job breaking stone
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1919-01-30

ent wife to support This may
hasten his release. =
Dear Mrs. Thompson: How can
a girl converse with a bashful boy?
SMILES.
If a girl finds It difficult 10 keep
up conversation with a bashful boy,
she shold resort 10 reading. This
takes up time and furnishes a topic
for conversation.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1919-01-30

The proposal to practically bar immigra-
ton to the United States for a number of years
is m eeting with strong support. The prevalent
notion is that we shall need some sort OF a
quarantine against the political ills that
breaking out in those countries from which
the heaviest influx probably would come il
there were no restrictions.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1919-01-30

: firm Of breeders in Iowa sold Sc Duroc
hogs recently for s36,725, an average Of $3.50
apieee. OF course they were not bought for
mea, hut the prices paid for these swine were
dire tly due to the fancy figures pork lately
las been bringing. While war has been pulling
down the aristocracy Of Europe it has been
building up another one on the farms of this
COuI try.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1919-01-30

The national war garden commissions post
ers already are in full bloom. AImanacs fail
to say whether this is a sign of an early spring
They must have some significance, however,
otherwise Why should MONEY still be spent in
circulating them now that the war is over?
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1919-01-30

We hope Industrial conditions in the United
States may not come to such state. If every
body keeps a cool head and consufts his own
best interests there will be no danger.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1919-01-30
Menu Hint
BREAKFAST,

BREAKFAST.
Fruit Oatmeal
Fried Mush and Syrup
Coffee
LUNCHEON.
Lima Bean Soup Bread and
Butter
Cinnamon Tea Cakes
Milk or Tea
DINNER,
EscaIloped Oysters
Stewed Potatoes
Stewed Tomatoes
Lemon Pudding
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1919-01-30

Governor Lowden is entitled to credit for
undertaking to see that Illinois boys on their
return from Europe shall be given some sort
Of a welcome by home folks at New York 1t
should have been done before.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1919-01-30
SONGS OF THE WAR

(Tune: Long, Long Trail.
There's no long, long trail a-winding
Into no-man's land in France.
There no shrapnel shells are bursting
And no shining lance.
Therell be no more drills and hiking
Because our dreams have come true
And We've been and shown the Germans
What the Yankee boys could do.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1919-01-30
kEE<60Fd@8
4SGE68EG;
THE SITTER.

She sat down upon every plan
Brought up before her club;
She sat down the brute called man
thing not worth his grub;
Sat down on everything that's nice,
Condemned its bogus worth;
And, homeward bound, stepped on some ice
And sat down on some earth
JACQUES.
The ratification of the prohibition amend
ment to the constitution is proclaimed and an
nouncement is made that the restrictions on
the manufacture of near-beerS have been Or
dered removed. One can well imagine the in
terest the latter announcement would have Gre
ated a year or so ago, but now, when the proc
lamation mentioned above is also considered,
one does not wonder that the newspaper Of
fees were kept busy answering telephone calls
to affirm the report that the manufacture Of
near-beerS was again to be permitted
THAT'S OUR ONE MARK OF DISTINCTION.
Sir: have often wondered why you do not
spend more space, time and thought upon Ruiz
STA as the situation there appears to be a field
with a wealth Of material for Jokes, and one
that many are taking advantage Of Why do
you pass it up? n. B.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1919-01-30

The versatile Mr.. Monroe at least gave Us
a temporary impression that we were up
against something new in crime, or near crime
but It seems he was one of the same old type
with penitentiary record.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1919-01-30

Bouquets by the way of showing apprecia-
ton for the part they played in the war, con-
tlnue to be thrown 1t the Yankees. Paris
blames them for 81 murders, 22O assaults and
500 serious fights and they are also held re-
sponsible for riots which broke out at Marburg
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1919-01-30

Considering the volatile quality of alcohol
the period between now and Jan. 16, 1920.
should be long enough for the drying-out pro
cess in this country.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1919-01-30
Last Call for the Water Wagon.

News item: The hiccough epidemic which
broke out in Louisville and other parts of Ken
lucky continues-to spread. Tandy Quisenb berry,
widely known tobacco man, has been hiccough-
ing since last Tuesday.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1919-01-30
THAT'S OUR ONE MARK OF DIsTNCT1o,
Add Modern improvements

pittsburgh Gazette-Times).
One large furnished room for two gentlemen
with kitchenet,
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1919-01-30
Diplomatic PliraseOlOgy.

Diplomatic PliraSeOlOgy.
Jefferson, Ohio, Gazette)-
Considering everything there a good at
tendance at church Sunday.
1t has always been the general impression
that the expression food Spectator" referred
to the wealthy brokers who deal in foodstuffs.
But it seems the impression is wrong. A. Z. L.
says the most of US are food spectators as
we are always specializing as to where we are
going to get the next meal
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1919-01-30

An automobile firm makes the announce
ment that diamonds used in the manufac-
ture of its machines. Judging from the prices
asked for some autos, one would imagine that
they were the principal material.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1919-01-30

Suggests 5000 Idle Painters Paint City"
says Chicago Tribune headline. 1t has been
our opinion all along that there were several
thousand engaged every night in painting the
oil town.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1919-01-30
THINGS THAT NEVER HAPPEN.

Once there was a barber,
BY name, J. Edwin Merritt,
Who combed q customers hair
Almost like he wore it
Life. which is able to get away with such
things hands down the decision that "the ideal
home is the place where the wife has her way
and the husband thinks he has his"
Add signs Of spring: The janitor has in
stalled the water-cooler.
With the prevailing weather wonder who
the coal men think they going to worry
with their As cent boost in the price of coal
But keep your eyes on the ice market
D. D. K.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1919-01-30

It is said 100000 Americans will remain in
France. Part of them are charmed with French
life and the rest with French women. Which
of the two reasons is responsible for the ma
Jority of the Yanks staying?
The ayes have it,
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1919-01-30
Boy! Page Mr.. FOch.
(Rockford Register-Gazette'

-UolLtLI5J
Rockton is the latest to put in a bid for one
of those German cannon. Looks as though the
terms of the armistice would have to be
changed again. With all the towns demanding
cannon for centerpieces in their scheme of mu-
nicipal decoration there won't be enough to go
around unless arrange for Germany to hand
over few more hundred.