Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1919-01-16
Little Talks by
Beatrice FdrfaT
BY BEATRICE FAIRFAX.

L WONDER II some or the dlHlcultles
set forth in letter I have just re-
ceived do not exist in q great many
homes where the factors OF second
marriage and stepchildren have COM
plicated the household situation.
in A such cSses. h have the courage to
hold for years to their own view of
duty and responsibility. as my cor
respondent has done, whatever 1t
may cost them-and it has cost her
II your second husband. naturally
preferring the young children OF
whom you and he were the parents.
came to dislike and even persecute
Of your first marriage. and even
made her banishment from the home
the price of your domestic happiness
what would you do. conscienti-
Gus and tender hearted woman read
err
/ will let her tell her own story.
about fourteen years ago l was
left a widow with a child OF four.
1 was able to work. but my employ
er promised to be a father to my lit
tie girl, and so married him. l now
have two other children. aged nine
"Five years ago my husband lost
all he had by gambling. me preao
in which my thirteen-year-ol daugh,
ter, my husband and myself worked
day and night. AS we prospered IN
this business my husband made my
tried to prevent her going to night
school. lie would allow her no
amusement. Many q time he threaten
ed to strike her. Finally he told me
that either she must go out OF sho
How could get a sixteen-year-
old girl. unable to take care, OF her
self, leave home. even II she were
not my child? Many people have told
me that I should have let her go,
since he cannot understand her. But
am sure Miss Fairfax you VIII not
Now my husband has been away
two years: My daughter Is In an OF.
I am failing in health and they do
not receive proper care. ] wait. hope
and pray. What shall I do2 Have, /
done right in letting my own child
'a' What would You Dot
Frankly, l don't think even consi-
entious women would agree about
situation of this sort. Many l am
sure. would take the practical view
that the peace of the home must be
preserved at all hazards. and that II
a stepchild proved, however inno-
Gently. to be the disturbing element.
that element must be removed. They
would advise the mother, in spirit
of Compromise to make the best pro-
vision possible for the unwanted
child so that the rest of the family
at least, could live in happiness and
sympathy.
fashioned view that woman owes
her husband absolute submission in
everything. will Insist that Whatever
maternal agony she might suffer. a
tate the membership of the household
even IL 1t involves sending defence
less young girl out into the world
alone.
A mother can do no more than fol-
low her own idea of what Is right.
wherever it may lead her. But l
find myself in especial sympathy with
this particular mother who for so
many years has stuck fast to her be-
lief & that a woman Ssr an,y isn nb,,5 uS''"e' !"
Just think for moment or the
pressure that must have been brought
to bear on her. Think what 1t meant
to resist. year after year the reiter.
who didn't want to tolerate another
mans child at his hearthstone-even
though the child was spending all
her energy to keep this hearthstone
the prospect OF the husbands deser-
tion. and his withdrawal of support
for the children, and the disapproval
of friends and neighbors.
You may DeneVe InlS WOMAN VIZ
totally wrong. but you must. admit
she was a heroine. l wish could
believe that there are many. of US
who so thoroughly live up to our
conclctions when the penalty TO De
paid Is 80 severe. And / don't know
any better fortune for a child than
to have a mother who takes mother
hood in this spirit
htink, of course. that the situa-
tions this courageous mother has de-
scribed is an extreme one. Step
children may often be the cause OF
Misunderstanding, but rarely, I be-
lieve, of such tragic results as this.
But for the very reason that 1t is
extreme, wish widows yes. and
widowers-would study 1t and take
warning.
warning tO> widows.
A second marriage. IL one has chill
dram Ii a far more serious AFFAIR than