davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1919-03-28

There was rush Of wind, a cloud
of dust, and the car rushed on, leav-
ing the old gentleman sprawling in the
roadway. He picked himself mp and
dashed up to a policeman, yelling ex-
citedly;
"That uotorcar knocked me down."
Tie policeman took out a business
like notebook and said:
ibid you notice the number, slr2'
''Yes.e said the injured one. 1T was
number &C"
Just then another policeman, who
had seen the accident, came hurrylng
IN. and said:
"No. no. The numbers 90. This
gentleman was standing on his head
when he noticed itw = Pittsburgh
Chronicle-Telegraph.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1919-03-28

The most cutting bit of repartee we
remember 10 have heard in recent
weeks happened out n The Willongh-
bench picnic OF certain fraternity TO
which we belong. A very young man
and very pretty girl were discussing
costumes, horseback riding. golf and
fudge. The girl said that she could
ride. but preferred the old-fashioned
side saddle. She said she thought It
more graceful
"But, really. Miss T.. insisted the
very young man. do you see anything
inherently improper in the divided
skirts'
-Nothing whatever, Mr.. o." an
swered the very pretty girl, earnestly.
For instance. think that you might
wear one with perfect propriety."-
Cleveland Plain Dealer.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1919-03-28
A Feeling Of Security

You naturally feel secure when you
know that the medicine you arr about TO
take IL absolutely pure and contains no
harmful or habit producing drugs
Such a medicine is Br. Kiimer's Swamp
Root, kidney, liver and bladder remedy.
The same standard Of purity. strength
and excellence is maintained in every
bottle Of Swamp-Root.
It is scientifically compounded from
vegetable herbs.
II is not a stimulant and is taken in
teaspoonful doses.
Il is not recommended for everything.
Il u natures great helper in relieving
and overcoming kidney. liver and blad-
der troubles.
A sworn statement Of purity is with
every bottle Of Dr. Kilmer's Swamp
Root
II you need medicine. you should
have the best. On sale at all drug stores
in bottles Of two sizes, medium and large
However, if you wish first 70 try this
great preparation send ten cents to DR..
Kilmer & Co, Binghnmton, N. Y, for a
sample bottle. When writing be sure and
mention this paper.-Adv.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1919-03-28
Lives 200 Years !

For more than 200 years, HARLEM Oil.
The famous national remedy Of Holland,
has been recognized as an infallibls relief
from all forms Of kidney and bladder dis
prders. Its very age is proof that it must
have unusual merit.
If you are troubled with pains or aches
in the back, feel tired in the morning,
headaches, indigestion, insomnia, painful
Or too frequent passage of urine, Irritation
or stone in the bladder, you will almost
certainly find relief in GOLD MEDAL,
HARLEM Oil Capsules. This is the good
old remedy that has stood the test for
hundreds Of years, prepared in the proper
quantity and convenient form to take.
II is imported direct from Holland lab.
oratories, and you can get it at any
drug store. It is a standard. old-time
home remedy and needs no introduction.
Zach capsule contains one dose OF flFc
drops and is pleasant and easy to take.
They will quickly relieve those stifTened
joints, that baclache. rheumatism, lum-
bago, sciatica. gall stones, gravel, brick
dust, etc. Your money promptly refund
ed If they do not relieve you. But be sure
to get the genuine GOLD MEDAL brand.
In boxes three sizes.--Adv.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1919-03-28
COMB SAGE TEA IN
HAIR TO DARKEN IT
lgs crandmother's Recipe to keep
her Locks Dark, Glossy,
Beautiful.

The old-time mixture of Sage Tea
and Sulphur for darkening gray
streaked and faded hair Is grand
mothers recipe. and folks are again
using 1t to Keep their hair a good,
even color, which is quite sensible, as
we are living in an age when youth
full appearance is of the greatest ad-
vantage.
Nowadays, though we don't have
the troublesome task Of gathering the
sage and the mussy mixing at home.
All drug stores sell the ready-to-use
product. improved by the addition Of
other ingredients, called "wyeth's Sage
and Sulphur Compound 1t is very
popular because nobody can discover
II has been applied. Simply moisten
your comb or a soft brush with it and
draw this through your hair. taking
one small strand at time; by morning
the gray hair disappears. but what de-
lights the ladies with Wyeth's Sage
and Sulphur Compound. is TINT. he
sides beautifully darkenlng the hair
after few applications, It also pro-
duces that soft lustre and appearance
of abundance which is so attractive.
ADV.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1919-03-28
DON'T DRUG KIDNEYS
RUB BACKACHE AWAY
Instant relief Rub pain. soreness and
stiffness from your back with
nSt. Jacobs Llniment."

Kidneys cause backache7 Mol
They have no nerves, therefore can
not cause pain. Listen Your back
ache is caused by lumbago, sciatica
or strain, and the quickest relief is
soothing, penetrating "St Jacobs Llni-
ment." Hub it right on the ache or
tender spot. and instantly the pain,
soreness, stiffness and lameness dis
appears. Don't stay crippled Get n
small trial bottle of "St. Jacobs Lini-
mcnt" from your druggist and timber
up, A moment after It is applied you'fl
wonder what became of the backache,
scatica or lumbago pain. "St. Jacobs
Liniment" stops any pain at once. It is
harmless and doesn't burn or dlscolor
the skin.
It's the only application to rub on a
weak. lame or painful back. or for
lum5ago. sciatica, neuralgia. rheuma-
tlsm, sprains or a strain.--Adv.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1919-03-28

''Why NOT spell Germany with a
small G hereafter queries superln-
tendent Shells. surely She has earn
ed the distinction.
1.-The old incorporating, potbellied
capital G is typical of German type
of other years. hut the small g that re-
sembles whipped dog. with its
down-hanglns tail between its legs.
is in keeping now"--Los Angeles
Times.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1919-03-28
SPEECH APPEALED TO HIM
More or Less Good Reason Why List
ener Considered It Great
oratorical Effort.

They are telling god joke on VIII
Upshaw. He was up the CHER day,
and was the interesting center OF sew
eral groups Of members who had heard
Of the prohibition Cyclone of
Georgia.
While talking in the lobby to one
of these groups Of forthcoming as,
socrates, Congressman Garrett Of EIous-
ton, Tex. passed after salntations.
Did you ever hear Garrett speakT
asked Upshaw of The members Of his
group.
Yes they all chlmed in.
"rhe most mastery address, the
most beautiful. sorl-stlrring address
ever heard in ell my life Of asso-
citation with great orators. fell from
the lips of that great Texan and
statesman one night at Dallas" said
Upshaw.
"On what subject was Garrett speak-
ingYH queried one Of the party. rather
Interested.
He was introducing me- replied
Upshaw solemnly.-Atlanta Constitu-
ton.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1919-03-28
C,iarrhaI Deafness CANNOT Be Cured

by local applications as they cannot reach
the diseased portion OF the ear. There is
only one way to cure Catarrhal Deafness,
and that is by a constitutional remedy.
HALLS CATAERH MEDICINE acts
through the Blood on the Mucous Surfaces
OF the System. Catarrhal Deafness ID
caused by an infiamed condition of the
mucous lining OF the Eustachian Tube.
When this tube Is tnfiamed you have a
sumbllng sound or imperfect hearing. and
when It Is entirely closed. Deafness Is the
result Unless the Inflammation can be re-
duced and this tube restored to Its nor
NAL condition. hearing may be destroyed
forever Many cases OF Deafness are
caused by Catarrh, which Is an infianed
condition Of the Mucous Surfaces.
ONE HUNDRED DOLLARS for any
case OF Catarrhal Deafness that cannot
DO cured by HALLS CATARRH
MEDICINE.
Al Druggists TIC Circulars free.
r. J. Cheney & Co. Toledo. Ohio.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1919-03-28

pardon me-" said the army cook.
for military chefs are prone TO adj
dress their underlings courteously,
but / prithee tell me where you
learned to peel potatoes so artis-
ucally7 I observe that you do not
cut of the cuticle in great hunks.
as. alas. too many do. but loosen
bit of the skin Of the tuber and then
deity strip it all on. You must have
had much experience IN sltnnings e'er
entering upon a soldiers llfe?"
q did. thank you, SIR replied the
accomplished member Of the kitchen
police. Before decided TO make the
world safe for democracy l was a
banker. kansas City Star.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1919-03-28
BOscHEEs SYRUP

Why use ordinary cough remedies
when Bosehee's Syrup has been used
so successfully for fifty-one years in
ali parts of the United States for
coughs, bronchitis, colds settled in the
throat, especially lung troubIes2 1t
gives the patient a good nights rest,
free from coughing, with easy expec-
toration in the morning, gives nature
a chance to soothe the inflamed parts,
throw off he disease. helping the pa
tient to regain his health. Made in
America and sold for more than half
a century.-Adv.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1919-03-28

IF you dig pit for your neighbor.
you may fall Into It yourself remark
&c the man who remembers his Sunday
school vaguely.
Yes" returned Mr.. Chuggins; that
retribution Idea may be ali we'll enough
for pIt-digging But the man who
breaks glass bottles in the street very
seldom has any tires Of his own to be
ruined"
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1919-03-28

Prof Albert Bushnell Hart of Har-
sard said in Boston the other dry /:
'The kaiser was always unbalanced.
Look at the way he was continually
rigging himself out In different uni
forms and costumes. Why. the man
neinally had 1874 SUITS
Professor Hart smiled.
Exclusive" he added. "of his go
ing-away suit"
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1919-03-28

1t seems, after all, that the kaiser Is
developing a pretty strong following
in a most unexpected quarter. Rus
sci IIarker, Big Rapids soldier, writes
home in a vein suggesting the begin
nings Of change of attitude on his
part which may in time go far:
In Paris now; great city.
Met French maid; great girl.
Took her to a cafe; great eats.
"Says she likes all Americans who
fought in the war
"God bless the kaiser."-Detroit
News.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1919-03-28

A young American soldier, who was
married just before sailing. was so
fred with patriotism that he was GER
tain he would have an opportunity to
do something heroic before the war
came to an end. He mentioned this
in letter TO wiley, and told her he
hoped to bring her the Croix lie Guerre
from France. But the youthful patriot
received this reply from his better
half. cts so sweet Of YOU dear, to
offer to bring me the Croix de Guerre
you mentioned, hut IL it's just the same
TO You. I'd rather have hat from
Parish
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1919-03-28
cutieura for pimpIy Faces.

To remove pimples and blackheads
smear them with Cuticura Ointment.
Wash on in five minutes with Cuti-
cura Soap and hot water. Once clear
keep your skin clear by using them for
daily toilet purposes. Don't fail to in
clude Cuticura Talcum.-Adv,
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1919-03-28

Jean was romping with her dog in
front Of the house under the watchful
care of her mother. A woman passing
asked her If she knew where a GER
tain woman lived. Jean was over
heard to say, Yes. she lives over there
in the third layer"
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1919-03-28

Bobby was good about saving his
pennies and buying Thrift stamps all
during the war, but with the FIRST 50
cents he accumulated after the war
was over he bought candy, for which
mother scolded him. Crying, he said:
"Oh, gee. a Teller can't even be patri-
otto and have little peace celebra-
ton without being called down"
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1919-03-28

Just as soon as you eat a tablet or
two Of Pape's Diapepsin all that dys-
pepsia. Indigestion and stomach dis
tress ends. These pleasant. harmless
tablets Of Pape's Diapepsin never fail
to make sick, upset stomachs feel fine
at once, and they cost very little at
drug stores. Adv.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1919-03-28

Arm CLoUDs coNEs sUSzHnE.
AFTER DZsFoNDENcY COMES joy.
AFrER SIcKNEss CONES HEALTH.
AFTER WEAKNESS COMES STRENGTH.
In the spring when you're call
in"-fagged out-blood thin, if
you will turn to Natures remedy,
a tonic made from wild roots and
banks, which has stood fifty years
as the best spring tonic-you will
find strength regained. No need
to tell you it's DR.. Pierce's Golden
Medical Discovery, put up in tablet
or liquid form, and sold by every
druggist in the land. After a hard
winter-shut up indoors, your blood
needs a temperance tonic, q tissue
builder and blood-makersuchas this
Medical Discovery" ofDr. Pierce's.
Petersburg, Vo.-"My little girl has
always been very puny and weak and was
subject to colds and coughs. / gave her
the Golden Medical Discovery and it
helped her wonderfully. It built her up
and started her TO grow strong and healthy.
! am lad 10 recommend DR. Pierce's
Golden Medical Discovery for rundown
or weak systems. Mfrs. W. D. Dickson,
l07 Woisorer Are.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1919-03-28
END INDIGESTION.
EAT ONE TABLET
PAPE's pIAPEPsIN INSTANTLY
RELIEVES ANY DISTRESSED,
UPSET STOMACH.

Jumps Of undlgested food causing
pain. When your stomach is acid, gas
sy, sour, or you have fiatulence, heart
burn. here is instant relief-No wait
ingl
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1919-03-28

"Did you say Bliggins is a good los
err" Yes "Why, even when his luck
is worst he never loses more than two
or three dollars That's what call
good loser"
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1919-03-28

First Newsboy-Dere amt no news
in de papers any more.
Second Newsboy-No. I'm selling
dem now by hOllering de headlines of
de adyertisements.-Judge.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1919-03-28

81 just dote on hotel dinner"
$50 do /, If II is good table
d'hote.7
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1919-03-28

BE patriot Don't mar the immor-
tai emblem Of humanity, the Declare
ton Of Independence.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1919-03-28

Being in society is good deal like
seing in Jail it isn't so bad after you
get Used to II.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1919-03-28

what is tile best test OF realism IN
a piay?' ''lbe real money It draws at
the box Office
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1919-03-28

The great trouble is that the people
who resolve to do or die don't do
either.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1919-03-28

Or. piarce's Pleasant Pellets put an end 70
sick and bilious headaches. constipation dlazi-
sees and Indigestion Clean house, Adv.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1919-03-28

Life may be a grand. sweet song to
some. but it's just plain jazz to . lot
OF us.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1919-03-28

'Pa, what is family jar2"
"A vessel Of wrath, my on.r--Bos-
ton Transcript.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1919-03-28

No, Hazel. not all gushing letters are
written with fountain pen.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1919-03-28

Everything we need is within reach
here and now, because It is within us.
Look within for the treasure mine.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1919-03-28

stella-Does she want matrimonial
bonds?
BelIa-No, matrimonial shortterm
notes.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1919-03-28

1t is wrong to sorrow without ceas-
inc
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1919-03-28

But for adversely some men would
never know how little they can Dor
row.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1919-03-28
Increase Your Wool Clip

Shear with narhine ard not only get 49, mere
wool the FIRST season hut leave a smooth even
stubble that gross more wool the next year You
lose money by shearing with hand shears. MI
enine sheasiuR is easier and doesn't scar the
sheep, Get a Stewart No. 9 Ball Bearing Shea.-
S2-pay balance on arrival Write for cataloQ.
CHICAGO FLExl8LE SHAFT COMPANY
Dept 172. isih Sroat arc ceafra Ave-. ehiesxs, ~
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1919-03-28

Free speech is no excuse for talking
too much.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1919-03-28

A few cents buys tiny bottle Of
the magic Freezone at any drug store.
Apply a few drops Of Freesone upon a
tender. aching corn or callrs. In
stantly that troublesome corn or callus
stops hurting, then shortly you lift It
cut. root and all. without any pain
soreness or irritation. These little bot.
ties Of Freezone contain just enough 70
rid the feet Of every hard corn, soft
corn, corn between the toes and the
calluses on bottom Of feet. So easyl
SO simple Why wait? No humbug !
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1919-03-28

The Addition.
as II true that Mrs. lIasty's tenn
per broke up the family?g
''Yes, and most of the croekery."

Garfield Tea is Natures laxative and
blood purifier; it, overcomes. constipation
and its many attendant ailn1ents.-Adv.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1919-03-28

Never forget the high cost Of So,
rying,
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1919-03-28

The budding mustache of youth IRE
quently gets twisted.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1919-03-28

Indigestion produces alsagreeabie and
sometimes alarming symptoms Wrights
indian Vegetable Pills stimulate the dige5-
tive processes 70 function naturally. ADV.
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1919-03-28

REyARNIsH Furniture ard AHtos, Quick easy
method makes you expert Hasy money. Stamp
brings particulars aos l. scHKrltK, rsEsasuth 0a1u
Maryland independent. [volume] (Port Tobacco, Md.) 1874-current, 1919-03-28

lEAAo I'LL oil field q Ire World tod
IN OUT weekiy letter It's ffoo. Send TO-DAY
gIcKAPvo OIL ASSOCIATIONS, Tcxarknnn, Tex
The Washington herald., 1919-05-04
W.

had such a nice letter several days
ago from Mrs. T. o. Donaldson. wife
Of Gen. Donaldson, who has been vis-
iting In New York for about a month.
She Is having a beautiful tispe there.
going to parties galore. ShN b been
given dinners, dances, theater and
opera parties day after day. She
motored out, too. a number of times
to Mineola to watch her herofc
young son. Lieut. John o. Donaldson.
fly. Just now he is touring the coun
try in the interest OF the Liberty
Loan. She received last week a pho
tograph Of her husband, who has been
at Tours for quite a few months now,
dated April 13, showing himself being
decorated by Gen. Petain with the
Legion of Honor. That is the second
decoration for the Donaldson family;
rather. the second member Of tae
family to be decorated, for John y.
was decorated several times. Mrs.
Donaldson has just written the story
of John O.'s capture and escape from
a German prison for Harper & Broth
ers. and 1t is to appear in one OF their
publications in either July or August.
Mrs. Donaldson is having such a good
time she thinks she will remain IN
New York another two weeks. which
will bring her home about the middle
The Washington herald., 1919-05-04

ing to DO for the French war relief
committee among the peasants Of the
Aisne no fellow can md out-the add
ed paragraph which closed the COM
munication OF the State Department.
signed by the second Assistant secre-
tary OF State, Hon Alvey A. Adee. will
be Of interest TO all who have for the
last four years been engaged in sue
cessful relief work:
Furthermore. I wish 20 inform you
that In view OF changed conditions the
department has adopted the policy not
70 issue any more passports TO enable
unmilitarized relief and hospital work.
ers to 60 TO France"
80 there you are. You NAV have
invested well over s1.ooo.o 900 IN relief
for the people OF villages In trouble;
you may have pledged your word 10
carry through certain things upon
which lone-suffering localities depend;
you may have 800 young children on
your hands who have returned be-
cause they and their people count on
you to zee them through. as you havs
promised them this FIRST year-arid
suddenly. without warning, you are
told by a paternal government that
CONTINUED on PAGE six
The Washington herald., 1919-05-04
ANOTHER CHARMING VISITOR
FROM MERRIE ENGLAND.

Mrs. William Wilson has a charm
ing visitor at her apartment in the
Ontario. her niece, Mrs. Jack Car
penter. formerly Marjorie Ord. Her
husband. you know. was killed in
the wsr. She is the daughter of
DR.. and Mrs. William Ord. OF Saulis-
bury, England. Mrs. Wilson, you
will remember. went to England to
visit the Ords just before Germany
declared the submarine blockade
and was only there for a week or
two. when the blockade was de-
clared. and she sensibly hurried
back home. Mrs. Ord was Carrie
Billings, daughter Of the late DR..
John S. Billings. of this city. Mrs.
Wilson was Dot" Billings, a sister
iR-law of Charlie Wilson and Mrs.
T. Perry Lippitt. Old DR.. Ord.
grandfather of Marjorie, and DR..
Billings were close friends. and Car
rie Fittings met Marjorie's father
when she went to England with her
father to visit old DR.. Ord. Mar
jorie has been here about a week
and is going to remain indefinitely.
Quite a few parties are being given
for her. Mrs. Eveleth E. Whiting.
wife of Maj. Whiting. gave a small
bridge party in her honor yesterday
afternoon and asked a few friends
in for tea afterward. Mrs. whiting
who was Fannie Cox, of the old
Washington and Georgetown fam
! lily. and the Wilson's and Billings
girls all grew UP together.
The Washington herald., 1919-05-04
NOW TO JupoG 4 WonAn
~ HGR HAiR

There Is real common sense II
just noticing whether the hair i
well kept 10 judge of a woman's
neatness. or good taste. II yot
are one of the few who try to
make the most of your hair, re-
member that il is not advissblt
to wash the hair with any eiesnser
aade for all purposes, but aiwsyt
use some good shampoo. You car
enjoy the very best by getting
some eanthrox from your drug.
gist, dissolve a teaspoouful in
cup OF hot water. This makes .
full cup of shampoo liquid, enough
SO IL Is easy to apply Il to all the
hair instead Of just the top OF the
head. Dandruff, excess oil and dir
are dissolved and entirely disap-
pear. Your hair will be so f1uffy
that il will look much heavief
than il is. Its luster and softness
will also delight you, while the
stimulated scalp gains the health
which insures hair growth.--Adv