The spectator., 1919-04-04

Our guns crew, as was it's wont. was sitting on the straw in the corner of our billet, far from the rest of the sec ton. The previous night we had been relieved from the fire trench, and were resting" in rest billets. Our days rest" had been occupied ia digging a bombing trench, this trench to be used for the purpose of breaking in would be bomberS.
 Hungry FOxcroft was Slicing away at q huge loaf of bread, while on his knee he was balancing piece of ''is- sue' cheese. His jack-knife was pretty dull and the bread was hard, so every now and then he would pause in his cutting operation to take large bite from the cheese.
 Curly Wallace whispered to nc:
 ''Three bob to q tanner. Tank, that he cats the cheese before he finishes slic- ing that 'rooty.'"
 I whispered back:
 "Nothing doing, Curly, you are Scotch, and did you ever see Scots man bet on anything unless it was a sure winner?'
 He answered in an undertone:
 Well, let's make it pack of flags. How about it, Yank?"
 1 acquieseed. (Curly won the fags)
 Sailor Bill was sitting next to Curly, and had our mascot, Jinl-a Sorry-look- ing mut-between his knees, and was Ai,sl- rinnnS nf e paws. Jim was wagging his stump of q tail and was intently watching Hun gry's operation on the bread. Every time Hungry reached for the cheese Jim would follow the movement with his eyes, and his tail would wag faster. Hungry, noting this look, bit off q small piece of the cheese and Tipped il in Jim'S direction. Jim deftly caught it in his mouth and then the fun be- gan. Our mascot hated cheese. It was fun to see him spit it out and sneeze.
 Ikey Honney reached over took the candle, and started searching in his pack, amidst a chorus of growls from us at his rudeness in thus depriving us of light. l was watching him closely and suspected what was coming. Sure enough, out came that harmonica and l knew it was up to me to start the ball of conversation rolling before he began playing, because. after he had once started, nothing short of Ger man ''five-nine" shellburst would stop him. So slyly kicked Sailor Bill, who immediately got wise, and then broke the ice with:
 "Sailor. heard you say this after noon, while we were building that traverse, that it was your opinion that darn few medals were really won that it was more or less an accident. Now, just because your D. c. NJ. came up with the rations, and, as you say. it was wished on you, there is no reason in my mind to class every winner of a medal as being accidentally lucky "
 This medal business was a sore point with Sailor Bill, and he came right back at me with:
 "Well, if any of you lubbers can tell me where n D. c. M. truly came aboard in a shipshape manner-that is, up the after gangplank-then I will strike my colors and lay up on a lee shore for drydock."
 Ikey Honney had just taken long. indrawn breath, and his cheeks were puffed out like balloon. preparatory to blowing 1t into the harmonica, which he had at his lips, but paused, and, re- moving the musical instrument of tor ture, he exploded:
 "Blime me, I know of a bloke who won D. c. M., and it wasn't acci- dental or lucky, either. I was right out in front with him. Blime me, sure had the wind up but with French if was business as usual He just carried on."
 We all chirped in, "Come on, Ikey, let's have the story"
 'I will if you'll just let me play this one tune first" answered Ikey.
 He started in and was accompanied by dismal, moaning howl from Jim. Illey had been playing about a minute, when the orderly sergeant poked his head in the door of the billet, saying
 "The captain says to stop that infer nal noise"
 Highly insulted, Ikey stopped, with :
 "Some people lave no idea of mu- sic"
 We agreed with him.
 Somewhat notified, he started:
 Corporal French is the same bloke who just returned from Blighty and joined the Third section yesterday"
 Authors Note-The incident here re- lated is true happening. Corporal French won the D. c. M. In the manner described by Honney. I will not attempt to give it in the cockney dialect)