Courier Democrat. (Langdon, N.D.) 1891-1920, 1919-01-23

Standing With His Hand on the Knob,
He Turned.
81 couldn't help it, Hazel. 1t seemed
the only way. 1t seems so yet to me
There was nothing more to keep me
In Notwithstanding to make me
hurry away. If I had weakened and
temporiZed with you it would only
mean the deferring of just what has
happened. When you declared your.
self fatty and repeatedly it seemed
hopeless to argue further. l am a poor
pleader, perhaps; and 1 do not believe
in compulsion between us. Whatever
you do you must do of your w wolf.
tor, without pressure from me. We
couldn't be happy otherwise. If ]
compelled you to follow me against
your desire we should only drag mis-
cry in our train.
81 couldn't even say good-by. ]
didn't even want it to be good-by. ]
didn't know if I could stick to my
determination to go unless l went as
| did. And my reason told me that if
there must be a break it would better
come now than after long-drawn-out
chickering's and bitterness. If we are
so Numerically opposed where we
thought We stood together we have
made Il mistake that no amount Of ad.
justing, nothing but separate roads.
will rectify. Myself I refuse to be.
lieve that we have made such a mis-,
take. l don't think that honestly and
deliberately YOU prefer an exotic, use
less, purposeless, parasitic existence
to the normal, wholesome life We hap
PLY planned. But you are obsessed,
intoxicated-I can't put it any better
and nothing but a shock will SOBER
you. If I'm wrong. if love and Bits
c~ompanionship can't lure YOU away
from these other things-why, | sup
pose YOU will consider it an ended
chapter. In that case you will not
suffer. The situation as il stands will
be a relief to you. Ii. on the other
hand, it's merely a stubborn streak,
tldtt WIN l 4 you &'1ll NAtt Scu W
carried your proud little head on an
overstitr neck, do you think it's worth
the price? 1 don't.
I'm not scolding, little person. I'm
to. No fool pride can close my eyes
to the fact or keep me from admitting
freely that I love you just as much
and want you as longingly as l did
the day / put you aboard the Stanley
D. ut Bella Coda. l thought you were
stepping gladly out of my life then.
And / let you go freely and without
anything but a dumb protest against
fate, because it was your wish. l can
step out of your life again-if it is
your wish. But 1 can't imprison my
self in your cities. I'm neither an
idler nor can I become a legalized buc.
cancer. l have nothing but contempt
for those who are. Mind You, this is
not 80 sweeping . statement as it
sounds. No one has a keener appre-
citation of what civilization means than
I. Out Of it has arisen culture and
knowledge, much Of what should make
the world a better place for us all. But
somehow this doesn't apply to the
mass, and particularly not to the cir.
cles we invaded in Granville. With
here and there a solitary exception
that class is hopeless in it's SNUG self.
satisfaction-its narroWness of out
look, and unblushing exploitation of
the less fortunate. repels me.
"And to dabble my hands in their
muck, to settle down and live my life
according to their bourgeois standards,
to have grossness Of soft flesh replace
able sinews. to submerge mentality in
favor Of a specious craftiness of mind
which passes in the city for brains
well, I'm on the road. And, oh, girl,
girl, I wish you were with me.
II must explain this mining deal
that phase of it which SEM ME on the
rampage in Granville. I should have
done SO before, should have insisted
on making it clear to you. The other
side had been presented to you rather
cieVerly at the right time. n your
ready acceptance of it angered ME be-
yond bounds. You were prejudiced.
1t stirred me to a perfect fury to think
you couldn't be absolutely loyal to
your pal. When you took that position
l simply couldn't attempt explana-
lions. Do you think I'd ever have TAX
en- the other fellows side against you.
right or wrong7
Anyway, here 1t Is: You got the
essentials. up to n certain point. from
Brooks. But he didn't tell 1t all--hls
kind never does, not by a long shot.
They, the four OF them. 1t seems. held
a meeting rs soon rs l shipped out
that gold and put through that stock