The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1919-02-27

! forces on the Rhine. Beneath the
crest, showing cootie rampant, are
, the words: "Coot NIT uns" Only
veterans Of three months scratching
experience are eligible.
! = 2 q
II happened in England where one
Of the crack regiments of horsemen
we're drilling. One very wild horse
made dash across the field in spite
Of all his rider could do. Where are
you going?" asked the instructor. 81
don't know, SIR replied the rider,
"but the horse belongs in Canada"
4 q q
When Bill Jones, buck private, re-
turns to find his sergeant delivering
the ice; the lieutenant collecting the
bills for the coal dealer; his captain
trying 10 sell him new car, and his
major running for some state Office
take il from us, boy, his time for re-
yenge has arrived.
Private Hogan was seated in the
first row at his farewell party before
sailing for France, and having inn
bibed too freely Of the amber brew
he found it difficult TO keep his bal
ance. An actress singing "Over
There" kept pointing at Hogan,
you're going over, you're going
overt "For tn love o. Nike" shout
ed Hogan, irritated, 81 know it; you
don't need to push mel"
The Ladies' Aid were having lunch
together and talking over the events
of the day. The question under dis
cussion was as to who had done most
to win the war. Some said Haig, 9th
ers Sims, others Foch and others Per-
shing. At last one woman Clipped in.
Il don't know who done most to win
he war;" she said, but know who's
been most talked about" who's :
hiatt" came a chorus. "Why, this
,ere Alice Lorraine that the French
md Germans came to blows overl"
= =
Some one, just for joke, asked for
ONE sweet potato seeds in a seed
tore. The clerk hunted all through
he seeds, but could find no sweet po-
alto seeds and finally appealed to the
oss. The latter explained that he
vas being kidded and cautioned him
bout not letting smart Alexis put
nything over on him. A few days
iter lady entered the store and
sked for some bird seed. saw, go
n" grinned the clerk, "you can't kid
lie. Birds is Matched from eggs
4 4
An Illinois physician who had mo-
,red into an Ohio town found the
egro porter standing back Of the
lachine laughing whats the joke? 2"
lquired the owner. "Nuthin', boss,
ut you're a doctor, amt your"
Yes" 81 thought so when saw
lat Red Cross on the front of your
lr. But if | owned a machine I'd
rely take that sign off the back"
he doctor walked around to the rear
I'd looked at his license tag. 1t read,
5000 H."
81 was reading the other day about
kind of fish in India or Africa or
mewheres over there, that climbs
ees,' said Old Bill Misgivens. 81
int think nothing special of it, for
'e known the same thing myself. A
Her went fishing and slipped and
sted a bottle of this here Internal
,onshine liquor. 1t all ran into the
EEK and before he'd got through
ling about it every dad-blamed fish
the hole climbed right up trees to
away from the miserable stuff"
They are telling this story in Boise:
poster on bill board in that city
'ws a woman in a bath tub.
ing man who was pifflicated the
er night stood in front Of the bill
Ird and sang "The Star Spangled
nner." But the lady in the tub was
patriotic and did not stand up.
\ man was arrested for stealing
e bottles of beer. Il can't fine this
A." said the judge. "Why not?"
rted the policeman who had made
arrest. Because it, takes three
'e bottles to make case" said the
ye. "The defendant may go home
his wife and kids
q 6
ere is report from the Civil ,
archives concerning the captur-
of a rebel battalion by batta-
Of Union troops, in which the ma
detailing the engagement, wrote
'ollows; sour left was trying to
e around the rebel right, but the -