The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1919-03-20
THE FRENCH TRY
BASEBALL .

John Evers, Mike Donlin and othel
{ stars of the great American gam,
have been trying at odd moments t.
teach the French to play baseball al
sketch from the Baseball Magazine
! would indicate that the Americans eff.
forts have not met with unqualified
succe IS:
! John EVERS-Well, fellows, if you
think you have the rules down pat
let's start real game. You've looked
great in practice, and l guess you are
all set, aren't you?
Colonel Dieuxtemps-Oui, Monsieur
Evairs. Eet ees Eat We are prepare.
John Evers-Fine business. All o.
Kl Mike, will you umpire?
| Mike Donlin-Sure. Anything to
help the good work along. All ready +?
Take your positions. Batter-r-rup!
Lieutenant Santerre-Ah-h-h, re
kindness of re Monsieur Dongling! Re
task of re umpire, eet ees arduous,
tres exacting-I think re Monsieur
Dongling-oui, oui, | shall embrace re
Monsieur Dongling! Kisses Mr.. DON
lin on left cheeky
Mike -Here-hey-lay off'n
me! What the - say, what sorta
game is this, wanta know?
| John C. Hendricks-One on you,
Mike! Go ahead-start 'em off.
Mike Donlin-Come on! Batter-r-
rupl
Captain Partonnais lat bat)-So to
pliz re dear friends American, We
sail all spik re language Eengleesh,
oui?
Corporal Lassagne (pitchingD-Oui,
ouil So sail We spik! One t'ousan'
pardons, mon captain, but am about
to peetch re outcurve!
Captain Partonnais-Eet ees veil
sail re outcurve assault wiz re beet
tremendous, re beet Eat sail for re
run of re home go avec rapidement!
John Evers-Here, here! What
d'ya call that stuff? You're supposed
to fool the batter, not to tip him off
Corporal Lassagne-Ah, Monsieur
Evairs Ees eet Eat l sail deceive
mon captain Eat has been as a gros
oncle to me zese four years? Eat
would be re ingratitude horrible!
Mike Donlin--Ho, hol Haw, haw!
Oh, John, learn something new
wouldn't that be great to pull at the
Polo grounds?
Captain Partonnais-Ze Monsieur
Evairs, he ees of rightness, oui. Eet
ees all game of re sport, mon cap
oral. Peetch re ball, but tell me not
vat ees re peetchl
Corporal Lassagne-Zen, avec votre
pardon, mon captain, acceptez-la!
Mike Donlin-One strike!
Colonel Dieuxtemps-Sacre! Sapris-
til All, Monsieur Donling, Eat ball eet
go so far outside re plate!
Captain Partonnais Monsieur
Dongling, wiz re bat ten feet long |
could not Eat ball have encountered!
General Huillier-Doubtless Mon
sieur Dongling make re small mees-
take, Feet ees unfortunate Eat We
make re objec'! Monsieur Dongling
,ill pardon re objection.
John Evers-Hey, lookahere That's
10 way to kick about raw decision!
Make him know you are kickingl
Stand up for your rights Kick, I tell
you, kick!
Captain Partonnais-Ah, Monsieur
svairs, non, non! Fees eet Eat We
Fall keeck re so-good Monsieur Dong
ing, who make re sacrifice of re time
o precious to zis ball game umpire?
Nh, non, non / repent Eat make re
bjec' l embrace re Monsieur Dong
ing on re both cheek!
Mike Donlin-Help Helpi Get
way from me. Somebody gimme a
at! What's this I've got into, /
santa know?
John Evers-Haw haw. haw haw,
o no, hee heel (Rolls on ground.)
Captain Partonnais-0uchl Oeeeh!
lille tonnerres! am smitten viz ~
all
Corporal Lassagne-Ah, mon capt. =
ain, re tousand pardons! Re ball ac-
urst, eet deceive mel try to t'row
e outcurve, but ! forget, | forget
t'row instead re incurve, an ne ball
ct strike mon noble captain!
Captain Partonnais-Eet already
es forgot. Embrace me, mon capor- .
|! (They kiss each other.)
John Evers-Wonder how that
ould go over home. Can you mag q
he Heinie Zimmerman kissing Jim
aughn after Jim sunk fast one in 81
is shape? E