The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1919-09-30
A ARDMORE CAR OWNER
ADVISES DON'T PARK
NEAR FIRE PLUGS

Ardmore has n whole lot of ordi.
nances including those which are tab.
ulated and compiled, adjudicated and .
annotated and non.adjudicated and un.
annotated
Some of these ordinances are good, |
some are bad. some are very bad and |
some are not worth a tinker's hurrah |
in that land in which departed fidders .
are said to seek an eternal habitat.
Some of the ordinances are enforced |
to the letter, some are partly enforced .
some are never enforced and some are
not worth trying to enforce.
All of the above and foregoing accord |
ing to the statement of one of the best |
lawyers and citizens of Ardmore.
The part relative to the enforcement |
of some of the ordinances, as the same |
particularly applies to one particular
ordnance, is written after an interview
with three lawyers and one minister Of
the gospel)
The latter gentleman stated to the p.
Man on the Street" that he was firm
believer in the sanctity of the law and |
felt that it should. at all times and un.
der all circumstances, be upheld and
vindicated; that the Scourge of the law
should smite the backs of the guilty, |
letting not the ninety and nine escape
in order that one Dog Tray, caught in
bad company, might go unwhipped of
justice.
Hence it was that this gentleman OF
the church, himself an owner Of an
automobile while driving down the
main stem of this beautiful city Of oil
realizations and political aspirations
noted the manner and style with which
certain autoists bombarded the atmos-
phere with muffler open, and how 9th
erS scorched the asphalt ana cut cor
ners and hummed over crossings and
took turns on two wheels and scattered
dust into the eyes of the just and the
unjust. alike. and left in their wakes
long, blue ribbons of profanity, which
bubbled and ebuated from the lips of
the mere pedestrians who had flirted
with death in an unwise attempt to
pursue their daily avocations and earn
their lcaVened bread while the autos
were out. to catch them if they didn't
mind out.
And noting all this he communed with
himself, our informant deposeth and
said, just as a careering auto turned
the corner on Main and Washington and
passed between a lady and her escort
marooning them each on n different side
of the street car tracks, in a swirl OF
dust and Old papers and general garb
age and street debris. Now, amt that
a shame? Were | anything other than
a preacher | would repeat the words
that man is saying and utter the words
the lady is thinking"
And then he drove his own foaming
benzine wagon to the sidewalks edge
and parked it right square, slap-dab in
front of a fire plug.
Hey there, 30! Don't you see that
plug" shouted blue.clad minion of
IA fractured law, Don't you see that
fire plug? Are your eyes lame?"
The preacher replied that his eyes
We're not travelling on crutches and that
his optical functions were not so i'm
paired as to necessitate course in Vo-
cational training; that he saw the fire
plug and thought it Il very pretty piece
of municipal equipment; that he felt
the day was not far distant nor unseen
when the waters of Hickory creek might
spout forth from the vents of the plug;
that he believed there were several other
plugs of the same general style and ar
chitecture of this particular plug, scat
tered about the city; that he had not
mistaken the plug for hitching post
and that he noted no board attached
thereto advising him that it was so
many miles to where he could buy a
pair of shoes, and other garments,
hence ne recognized the fact that it
was not a sign post.
The heck you say" vociferated the
policeman after the storm of oratory
had swept by, adding Move over, you,
and let me get in"
But | do not want you to get in"
said the preacher Il did not invite you
to ride with me and do not think that
you have any business at the place
where | am bound"
We'll" said the cop, you have bust
ness at the place whittier | am bound.
| am going to the police station and
you are going with me and after you
/ have held communion with the Chief,
you are going to see the Mayor. These
here laws of this here city are going to
be observed"
1t was then that the minister Of the
gospel awakened TO a realization of the
fact that he had, unwittingly, commit
ted & compound fracture of the ordi-
nances which prohibits the parking of
cars in front of fire plugs.
SO he drove around to the city hall
and hunted up the mayor and kicked in