Arizona republican., 1919-11-30
SCOTCH WORDS
(By Robert Leighton, Published in 1sss)

They speak in riddles beyond the Tweed plain English they defty read; Yet when without the book they to speak, Their lingo half English and half Greek jaws chafts; closed nsives Their breads in slices but in shieves Their armpits their oxters; palms are lufs; Their chields; their timid fools cuffs; Their lads callants and their women, kmmers Good lasses, denty queans and bad ones, limmers. They hoe when they endure scart when they scratch And when they give sample it's swatch. Scolding is fytin and long palaver Is nothing but a blether a haver This they call a butt and that the ben And when they do not know they dinna ken. On keen cold days they the wind baws shell. And when they wipe their they dicht their byke; And they have words that Johnson could spell As imphm which means anything you like. While some though English and well known Have got Scottish meaning all their To prig's plead. down thing in cost; To coft s to purchase; a coughs hoast; To crack Is to converse; the lifts the sky; And bairns are said to greet when children cry. When lost, folks never ask the way they want They spier the and when they yawn they gaunt Beetle with them's the clock; a flames a lowe Their straw is strae; chaff, cauff hollow howe pickle means a few; muckle is big: And piece of crockery is called pig Speaking of pgs-when Lady Deacour Was her celebrated Scottish tour One night she made her quarters the Grown" The head inn of well known Scottish The chambermaid in lighting her to bed Before withdrawing curtseyed low and said "The ncht is cauld, my teddy wad you please To hae pig in bed yer "A pig in the bed to tease Whats that you say? You are impertnent away, away!" Me mpident! men-I mean nae harm But just the beard pig to keep ye warm" "Insoent hussy, to confront This very instant shall your know. The bell-there's none. of course go here.' My mistress mem dinna need to fear; In sooth it herser that bade spier; Nae insult, mem We thocht ye be glad On this cauld nicht to hae pig in bed" Stay, girl your words are strangely out of place. And yet, see no insult in face. Is it custom in country then For ladies to have pigs in bed with them?' "oh quite the custom wi the gentles mem WI gentle ladies, ay, and gentlemen; And troth, if single. they wad sairly miss Their het pig a cauldrf nicht this"
 I've seen strange countries-but this surely beats Their rudest makeshifts a warming pan Suppose, my gir, should adopt your plan You would not put the pig between the sheets Surely my teddy, and other where Yell find it do the mais guid there" "Fie, fife, 'twould dirty them and if keep In fear of that you know would not sleep. Yen sleep far better Tax my advice; The nicht blaws snell-the sheets ice
  I'll mak sac comfortable and trig,
 Wi coortans, blankets every kind hap, And warrant to sleep sounds a tap. As for the fyin of the sheets--dear The pigs clean outside as pig be closed mouths enough iher folk But if ye like I'll put it in poke"
 'But Fife that's your name, think you said Do you yourself now take a pig bed?" "Eh. men pigs only for the great, Wha lie in feather beds and sit up late: Feathers and pigs for puir riff-raff- Me and my neibor lassie lie cauff" Whats that-a calf! If your gather. You and the other lassie sleep together Two in bed and with the calf between
 That suppose. my girl is what you mean?- Ma, leddy-od ye're jokin
 We sleep thegither that is
 But nocht between us; wi claes a af, Except sarks lie upon the cauff"
 Well we'll my girl surprised That of English habits live so
 Such barbarous customs-Effe you may 20; AS for the pig, thank you but
 Ha ha, good nght-excuse if laugh
 I'd rather be without both pig and calf"
 On the return of Lady Delacour
 She wrote a book about northern tour
 Wherein the facts graphically told
 That Scottish gentlefon<s when nights arc cold Take into beds fat pigs to keep them warm
 While common folk who share their bed halves Denied the richer comforts of the farm
 Can only warm their sheets with lean cheap calves circumstances were also used sy fassy representing the allegation Of the already contributed the Indictment that there conspiracy aid the No Senate Action Probab n office illegally There WASHINGTON. Nov 2s = htc IyStf fYnAnf had