davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1916-1920, 1919-04-06
Paris Bourse Trading,

PARIS. April b.-The prices on the
Bourse to-day were irregular. Thre6
per cent. rentes were quoted at SO francs
rs centimes for cash exchange on Lon
don. 81 francs rs centimes: s per cent.
loan. SO francs IS centimes. The dollar
was quoted at 5 francs 50 centimes to
5 francs % centimsA
The Guthrie daily leader. [volume] (Guthrie, Okla.) 1893-1996, 1919-12-22
CAL0TlDs IRE
BEST FOR COLDS
md influenza
Doctors Now Prescribe Calotabs.
the Purified Calomel Tablets
That Are Nausealess.
Safe and Sure.

Doctors are warning tho pablo that
simple colds and mild cases II influ-
enza often lead 10 pne1monis and csher
serScas complications. They say that
every cold should receive immediate
attention and thaa tire first step In Ehe
trcSasnenf is 90 make sure that the
liver ID active For this purpose Gallo
tabs. me perfected. rauSealess cslomsl
tablets are the suresi. best AMI mos
agreeable laxative.
One Caiosab q; bed time with =
swallow os uursr--thst's all 40 salts,
no nausea. and no upsstsing Of the
digestion and appetite Next morning
your SosG has vanished, your lrcr ~
active your system, Is purssied ard re-
freshed aud yol are feeling fina with
hearty appetite for breakfast. Eat
what YOU plezSe,-nc danger. =.
For your protection. Caauaes are
The Guthrie daily leader. [volume] (Guthrie, Okla.) 1893-1996, 1919-12-22
OSACE INDIAN LAND
SALE FEBRUARY 3RD

Another Ossgye Saie Is scheduled
for rsaEuary E. Al the office of she
Indian agency. PAwAuss2. Al This
time iheTr will be offered Indian lands
10 the amount Of sl-I3 acres. The
area covered by these lands is in pro
drcsng territory having s,Eos barrels
producing wells now bringing in an
average daily production OF $4,000
barrels The last Osage sale held
October 6. netted she indians over 81. u
100000, and TINS sale II is predicted.
VIII reach over tina; mark
The Guthrie daily leader. [volume] (Guthrie, Okla.) 1893-1996, 1919-12-22

lContinued from Page 40
Gently in which the principsl was |
woman who. because OF spinal trouble
could move only her head and hands
After. some time OF treatment. he de-
clared. she wss awakened one niShl
by voice which told her she wouic
be able 10 walk in the morning. When
morning came. he said. she arose zno
was a physically normal person.
IN his open lecture Mr.. Hiskson ex-
planned clearly the way the spirit cf
God works through him ia healing. He
explained that II Is unnatural 10 be III
and a sign OF violation OF one Of Cod
laws and tina, by prayer and the aid
os God this unnatural thing may bf
The scene yesterday in Trinity
church was probably the only one oi
lis kind ever witnessed in Pittsburgh
Old and young. rich and poor. cayns
TO ask the aid OF the healer and eac,
received that prayer and treatment
Tor which he came.
During the afternoon while Mr.
Hiekson wss a, the church for time
several dozen came in and were re.
seiscd and treated by him The serv-
ces viii be resumed this morning III
10 o'clock.
Mr. Hsckson does not claim any
'rcedii for himself because OF HI,
work He declares il is but 10 |
working through him to those whs /
Snnot be REACHED by themselves.
The Guthrie daily leader. [volume] (Guthrie, Okla.) 1893-1996, 1919-12-22
Catarrhal Deafness
Cannot Be Curec

BY local applications. as they canno
reach the diseased portion Of rAe "a,
There is only one ~sy to cure ca
isrraal deafness and that is BY q con,
siiiasiioaal remedy. Catarrhal Deaf
ness ls caused by an in1amed conLl.
'aoa OF the mucous lining OF tAe Eus
issahian Tube. When this tube Is in
Tanned yca have r1znbI.ng sound o
lnpAFfecl hearing. and when j; is en
isresy closed, Deafness is the resu.
Unless the inflammation can De
cnfed and this tube restored 10 X
normal condition, bearing will be g.
slrcyed forever Many cases Of deaf
ntss are caused by cstarrA. which .s
al srlfAsr1-ned condition ot the nlr
ocas surfaces. Haal's Cssrarrh Med.
cine acts thru the blood on the uuco-
s1r1sces OF the system.
Ne viii give One Hundred Dollar
for any case OF Catarrhal Deafnes
that cannot be cured by Halls Ca;ar.s
Medicine. Circulars free. All Drug
gfs1s, --c-
r. J. CHENEY d CO. Toledo. 0
The Guthrie daily leader. [volume] (Guthrie, Okla.) 1893-1996, 1919-12-22

These tablets are intended especial.
b - Indigestion and constipation
They tone Up the ssonAca and enable
Ii 10 perform its functions naturally
They scs gently 7 tne isre- and oowe.x,
thereby restoring the stomach and
bowels 10 heslfhy condition. When
you feel duIl. ssaasd and ooas;ipatsi
give them trial. You are certain 10
be pleased with their effect
The Guthrie daily leader. [volume] (Guthrie, Okla.) 1893-1996, 1919-12-22

Interrupted steamship conmanies
iion, the high cost af imported mer-
chandise. restricted naea snres on i'm :
ports sud exports. and other causes.
directly or indirectly conf -cSeds with
the war. all contributed TO restric;
commercial development in Panama
during 1878.
The Guthrie daily leader. [volume] (Guthrie, Okla.) 1893-1996, 1919-12-22
WILL REMARRv WIFE
TO AVERT COURT ACTION

Chicago. Dec. 7s-Roberf Bowmar
Peck wealthy poet. announces thai
he Is willing 10 marry Mrs. Florenc1
Reid Peck all over gain ii she will
drop her suit for separate msinien
ance. Peck says ihe first marriage
was Illegal They have TWO chicldren.
The Guthrie daily leader. [volume] (Guthrie, Okla.) 1893-1996, 1919-12-22

Among the last articles received
al the salvage headquarters OF the
American Red Cross in Washington,
are mimeograRh machine. several dis
caried bell hop uniforms. three soup
containers. seven trunks and harch
OF 15.V09 postcards.
The Guthrie daily leader. [volume] (Guthrie, Okla.) 1893-1996, 1919-12-22

A patent has been granted for de-
vice featured for sort Of three hand.
ed ciock dial 10 indicate In ord
the day os th~ week. day OF the month
and hour when a man absent from
ais office will return the public h
raaishsble by fine.
The Guthrie daily leader. [volume] (Guthrie, Okla.) 1893-1996, 1919-12-22

Every man. woman aud chsai in ia .
staie OF Oklahoma Enusi buy Red Cross
Christmas seals If the quota Of sIE.a.-
900 or le.ooa.0eo stamps is 10 bs
reached.
The Guthrie daily leader. [volume] (Guthrie, Okla.) 1893-1996, 1919-12-22
Only On. ~sRoMo oulNlNEr

To get The -enalne- csll for tuil name
LAXATIVE BRONO Q-TNINE Tab
lets. Look fer signature al f. w
GROVE. cures a Cold in One Ises,rr..-
The Guthrie daily leader. [volume] (Guthrie, Okla.) 1893-1996, 1919-12-22
r. ]. CHENEY d CO. Toledo. 0

The Red Cross wants 10 ind a ca.
7-ed woman 10 take care o. s sc.
colorad woman on Eas. Villas. Coco
wages viii be paid Apply al Ret
Cross rooms Phone s-s.
The Guthrie daily leader. [volume] (Guthrie, Okla.) 1893-1996, 1919-12-22
A TEXAS WONDER.

For kidney and bladder troubles.
gravel. weak and lame back, rhs1ma-
sism and irregularities OF the kidneys
and bladder. Regulates bladder trcu-
oles In children. If no; sold by drug
gisis. mail sl25. Small b-ossle o.leI
cure. Send for sworn testimonials
DR.. E, w. Ha.., 1926 Oi.re ST., st.
Louis. NO. Sold by druggists.
The Guthrie daily leader. [volume] (Guthrie, Okla.) 1893-1996, 1919-12-22

The Colonial government OF the
Dutch East Indies. proposes to build
as"s miles Of railways during the nexi
Is or % years
The Guthrie daily leader. [volume] (Guthrie, Okla.) 1893-1996, 1919-12-22

The laws OF Italy are strict in re-
rArd TO iheaters and circrses Every
sos or rersor nance announced on The
bills must be given.
The Guthrie daily leader. [volume] (Guthrie, Okla.) 1893-1996, 1919-12-22

Red Cross cnrisesnas Seals can
be secured BY calling - the Red
Cross roo-s5 in he feaera. huisd.
ing.
The Guthrie daily leader. [volume] (Guthrie, Okla.) 1893-1996, 1919-12-22

Don't forget 10 Sosn The savings claa
~ he Oklahoma State Bank.
The Guthrie daily leader. [volume] (Guthrie, Okla.) 1893-1996, 1919-12-22
Next chrss.m,s

Have plenty OF Christmas funds
next Christmas. join the Savings club
OF the Oklahoma State Bank.
The Guthrie daily leader. [volume] (Guthrie, Okla.) 1893-1996, 1919-12-22
chr,stmas Euoes

Don't forget TO Join the savings club
49, r~ OF the Okiahoma Stare Bank asNw
The Guthrie daily leader. [volume] (Guthrie, Okla.) 1893-1996, 1919-12-22

|sunken, black circles and pale
|chccks-I was restored to health
BY the Fayoritc Prescription Of Dr..
Pierce" So write many women.
Changed too IN looks, for after tax
ing Dr.. Piecce's Favorite Prescrip-
ton the skin becomes clear. the
eyes brighter, the cBselrs plump
Druggists sell it in tablets q
liquid. lisa rumaa's best tenn
perance tonic, made from wild roots.
WHISTLER, ALA.--T was bothered
with bsckache and headache and was
net able 10 do my work until tried
Or. Ferce's Favcr:se Prescription, and
can say | an now able 70 do sll my
uork, such as cooking. washing and
ironing. ard even getting wood, uber
before sxed this neiicine Va
almost m invalid ard did rct car
yhe,her lived or died ELlz,-
..rn tAaosAs. Car siIass. -
The Guthrie daily leader. [volume] (Guthrie, Okla.) 1893-1996, 1919-12-22
To Heal a ccuob

Take HAYES HEALING HONEY
ssc Per hottie.
The Guthrie daily leader. [volume] (Guthrie, Okla.) 1893-1996, 1919-12-22
Such a Change

in feelings
and lookl
after
suffering
pain, feel
ing ner-
vous, dig
zy, weak
and drag
gel down
by weak
nesses OF
my sex
my eyes
The Guthrie daily leader. [volume] (Guthrie, Okla.) 1893-1996, 1919-12-22

None Ssch Pudding - (Rscipe for ssise
kfs-c&er biscnits or biscuits; cupful
dark cern-eyrup: = cupful brown sugar: z
cupful butter substitute: 2 egg-yollo; y
cupfuls None Such Mince Meat: egy-vhites.
Beat egx-yollrs thoroughly before adding.
Mix ingredients completely. put in : we'll
oiled baking dish and bale thirty min utss
in . moderate oven. Make mefingue os
the egg-vhites. heap il on the pudding and
allow to brown in the oven.
The Corpus Christi caller. [volume] (Corpus Christi, Tex.) 1918-1987, 1919-11-07

d. lcd n thip werl, with 6n Aomiisr
-'iNF TIE acroni committee cnmtas
~ II Mte NJ o. lopc chairman. Mra.
tonnes Wnlmln lcrhhrdt louis nar-
no memberships Hnd thc thIfd c,.n
mi.tcg cans'atlng D., Mrs W n Grimm
lnd Mrs q W Calcott. added "a nstn.s
in ihe Nti Cross ruatcr
chairman Millst urges that those
VINO nave not sea Joined stud dollar
'nNmnef sh.ns o. either Dts nffrr an no
laM ~ fhe GALLEY nuJdne CO..
tp Rod l'rnss heahgnsftef. o. offi.a. ~
ihr Commercial Association
dNtlilNH report 0f thr gnfulls
.htis.l work to dafe s rlren below
Sod Cross
rrsnFf
The Corpus Christi caller. [volume] (Corpus Christi, Tex.) 1918-1987, 1919-11-07

Don't miss an 'ssue or the Caller.
The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1919-09-04
SURPRISES EXPECTATIONS
CONTINUED from page y

with the display from Cove. Bogus
Brook received the first award and
Cove the second. 1t was difficult for
the judges to determine which was the
best display, but eventually decided
that the Bogus Brook exhibit was su-
perior to the extent of a couple OF
points. The Bragge and Anderson
families were actually the people who
made it possible to enter this exhibit.
Like the good loyal Americans and
good farmers that they are, they hus-
tied around and supplied most of the
vegetables, grains, etc., from their
own farms-the neighbors contribut-
ing a very small portion. Mr.. Bragge
told US he did not want to see the good
old productive town of Bogus Brook
left out in the cold, so he, his wife
and M. B. Anderson and wife hoped
to the proposition. Both displays
were excellent and we are inclined to
give the farmers wives mentioned the
long end of the credit for the work
involved in getting together the COL
lections.
The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1919-09-04
County School Notes.

A few of the district clerks are tar
dy in sending in the annual report to
this office. Do it now, please, as our
report to the state is due in Septem-
Der.
The department of education mott
fed us last week that the Mile Laos
County Teachers institute will be held
in Princeton for five days beginning
September %. A school officers
meeting will be called during that
week.
The Cove school has added fourth
teacher this year and is now classed
as a graded school. Industrial sub
jects usually taught in consolidated
school are also taught. w. F. Frost
is the new principal.
Returns from the state teachers ex-
aminations held the first of August
are expected at any time now. Ger
tificates will be mailed out as soon as
received.
Census blanks were sent to every
clerk in the county some time ago
A complete census of all the children
Of school age must be taken at this
time. Special state aid will be with.
held from any district which fails ir
any one year to take the census unit
such census has been taken,
The Princeton schools opened OF
Monday morning with B. F. Hal
as superintendent. Supt. H. F. Bald
win succeeds F. C. Thompson at Mil
AGA, Chester c. Housh will have charg,
of the Onamia graded schools during
the ensuing year and C. V. Schofelt
has been retained for another year a
principal of the Wahkon schools.
| Olof Wasenius, Co. Supt.
The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1919-09-04
Public Schools Open.


The Princeton public schools opened
on Monday, September l, in the new
high school building. A very large
enrolment greeted the teachers in the
upper grades and high school. There
are six grades in the high school build
ing besides the high school, and all
have quite comfortable quarters. It
is little crowded and there is short
age of coat hooks and places to hang
wraps on account of the large number
in the building but it is hoped to ar
range all matters satisfactorily very
soon. Some difficulty was experienced
in getting enrolled in high school as
several pupils had taken courses that
were considerably mixed.
Parents should advise their children
against taking subject in high school
just for credit. They should urge
them to take some of the solid sub
jects in science, mathematics and his
tory in order to get a well-rounded
course that will fit them best for life
rather than to take only some courses
that seem to them to be easy.
All children having the whooping
cough should be kept at home until the
danger of giving it to others is passed.
Parents are invited to visit school,
and friendly criticism and advice will
be welcomed. Visiting on the part of
the parents will help to keep them in
formed in regard to the school and will
create much greater interest on the
part of the pupils, as it will inspire
them with a sense of the value of
school work we'll done. If you cannot
find time to visit ask about the child's
work and encourage the children to
do their best.
Do not let children stay out of
school for any reason except the most
necessary. The child who stays out
of school one day week loses two
because of the extra work necessary
to catch up. If possible have everyone
start to school at once. It will pay
Time spent in school has been care.
fully figured to be worth 50 or sic
per day in earning power added be.
cause of study. This is the average
and to some it is worth much more
than that. In addition there is rea
value to the community, the state ant
the nation which is more than equa
to the value to the individual.
Parents will aid the school to secure
good work if they will be careful t,
see that the pupil brings written ex
cuse for absence on his return t,
school. It may not make any diff
ference so far as your children ar
concerned, but it does help the teache
to check up on the school as a whole
B. F. Hall, Superintendent.
The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1919-09-04
Was Not a Drinking Man.

The daughter Of the house was en-
gagged in a desperate endeavor to drag
conversation from the shy and silent
young man, when the pianola in the
lounge began to play an air from one
Of Meyerbeer's operas.
"Don's you love Meyerbeer?' she
asked, hopefully.
Il have never touched intoxicants
IN my life," replied the young man
coldly.-Dallas News.
The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1919-09-04
Base Ball Games.

On Thursday the Greenbush team
put it over their country cousins from
Crown and walked off with the long
end Of a 6 to score. Greenbush took
the lead in the early part of the game
when they scored four runs in one
inning. Crown did all their scoring in
the fifth, when they punched hits and,
aided by several misplays on the part
of the Greenbush outfit, ran in a total
of six runs. Their lead was short lived
however, for Greenbush came right
back and grabbed off pair Of tallies,
tying the score, and the next inning
put over two more, cinching the game
and go per cent of the purse. Bat
teries: Leander and Sandstrom for
Greenbush, Kite and Kriesel for
Crown. Wood and Doane, umpires.
In the Friday game Princeton got
sweet revenge for their mistreatment
at the Kanabec county fair on Mon
day, as they manhandled the Mora out
fit to the tune of to 1. Princeton
outclassed the visitors in every de-
partment of the game and shut them
out up to the 9th inning, clearly dem
onstrating to the record crowd watch
ing the game that, had the game be-
tween these two teams at the Mora
fair been allowed to be played accord
ing to the recognized rules of base
ball, that bunch from the Snake river
country would have been handed a
life-sized trimming by Manager Hoff's
veterans. Beckett for Princeton was
in rare form and allowed the Mora
team only three hits; two of these
came in the ninth frame and paved the
way for Josh Clark's lone score, which
saved his team from shut out
Handschu was on the firing line fol
Mora and the locals touched up his
offerings for total of seven hits
Princeton scored one run in the second
three in the fourth and one more in the
fifth frame. From the second inning
on there was no question as to which
team would be returned the winner
and the only point left was whether
The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1919-09-04
The Other Way About.

The English clergyman was in the
middle Of his sermon when baby be-
gan to cry and it's mother rose and
carried it towards the door. "Stop,"
said the preacher, "the baby's not dis
turbing me-
The woman turned towards the pull
pit and replied, ooh, e amt, amt e?
But you're a-disturbin' Of I'm Bos-
ton Transcript.
The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1919-09-04
Horse Races.

Thursday-Farmers' race, trot or
pace, half mile heats, best 2 in 8, for
purse of $50; divided, first $25, Sec
ond SIS, third $40. Axel Bragge first
and second, Verne Steward third.
Running race, free for all, half mile
heats, best in 3, for purse Of $35;
divided, first SIS, second SIP, third
$3.50. Nels Robideau first, Hartman
Camp second, Robert Sausser third.
Friday-Free for all trot or pace, 1
mile heats, best 8 in 5, for purse of
$100; divided, first $50, second $50,
third $40. A. L. tombstone first, J. A.
Depue second, c. P. Grove third.
Farmers race, trot or pace, half
mile haats, best 2 in 8, for purse of
$40; divided, first $40, second $3.50,
third $3.50. Axel Bragge first and
second.
Saturday-Free for all trot or pace
/ mile heats, best in 5, for purse of
$3.50; divided, first $50, second $40
third $40. A. L. tombstone first, C. P
Grove second, J. A. Depue third.
Running race, free for all, half mile
heats, best 2 in 8, for purse of $40;
divided, first $3.50, second $3.50
third $40. Nels Robideau first, Hart.
man Camp second, John Mullen third.
The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1919-09-04
NOTES..

Inc Canad1an government eXnlDlC
of grains, grasses and vegetables at
tracted considerable attention.
Foley, Cambridge, Isanti, Mora and
the lake country, as we'll as Baldwin,
Blue Hill and Milaca were we'll repre-
sented at the fair.
The Mora ball team was on it's best
behavior when it came to Princeton,
and even after it had been vanquished
by the home team.
Mr.. Mccullough of the state expert
ment station judged the dairy cattle,
hogs and sheep, and Mr.. Carnes the
beef cattle and horses.
There were numerous industrial dis
plays at this years fair, the principal
being those of the Evens Hardware
Co., Galley Hardware Co., Odin Ode
gard and J. A. Lynch.
Verne Steward, formerly county
agent, had a nicely mounted display
(under CLASSY showing the different
varieties Of standard potato stems,
roots and leaves, with illustrations of
the tubers and giving a description
of the seed in each case. 1t was an
instructive exhibit.
Mrs. H. G. Cooney and Mrs. N, A.
Stacey, who superintendent the fruit
and flower department at the fair, are
both lovers of the beautiful in nature
the rich coloring, the blossoms, the
gradual evolution from the bud to the
| perfected fruit or flower. But best of
all, both are lovers of dumb animals
and birds-they speak for those that
cannot speak for themselves.
While every fair director did his
best to make the fair success, we
must take off our hat to E. K. Evens.
For months Ed. has been at work to
bring the fair up to standard of ex-
cellence and he performed no small
part in making it a success. Mr..
Evens is one of the greatest boosters
Princeton ever had or, if we are per-
mitted to prognosticate, ever will
have. He has at least the welfare
and prosperity Of the town in which
he resides at heart and there is nc
animosity in his soul.
Tom Skinaway-a subchief OF
something of that sort-accompaniet
by couple of squaws with papoose!
in their arms, were one of the at
fractions at the fair on Saturday
Tom is a chunky, fat, short-windet
old rooster who seems to have bee1
misnamed. When it comes to skin
away we scarcely think he could out
run turtle. But that's neither her
nor there. Sam, upon this perticula
occasion, was all dolled up in chief
headdress, varicolored pants an
= streaming ribbons flying in the all
y The first place he and his squaw
made for was the merry-go-rount
where he purchased tickets, escorte
l. his companions to chariot an
mounted a spotted horse. He after
" ward told us he had a grand an
glorious time, all right, but bronx di
= not buckee enough. Tom late
watched the airship and remarked
q "the biggest eagle I ever see-wish
i had my gun"
The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1919-09-04

Don't let your children suffer. If
they are fretful,, peevish, puny or
cross, give them HOLSTERS Rocky
Mountain Tea a harmless but safe
laxative for children. Csc. c. A. Jack
Drug Co. Adv.
The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1919-09-04
An Unsatisfactory Room.

Hotel Clerk-And how did you like
your room, sir?
Disgruntled Guest-It was most un-
satisfactory. There was no gas with
which to asphyxiate myself, no bath
in which I could drown myself, and
no rope fire escape with which to
hang myself and all I came here for
was to commit suicide.
The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1919-09-04

the visitors would be able to save
themselves from shutout, which they
finally did in their last chance at bat.
Batteries: Beckett and Mitchell for
Princeton, Handshu brothers for Mora.
Hoke and Newgard, umpires.
On Saturday Wahkon and Onamia
went to the mat, urged on by the
biggest delegation from the lake
country ever seen at the county fair.
This game proved to be a real con-
test and finally wound up 2 to in
favor of Wahkon: Onamia played a
strictly home team with the exception
of their pitcher, Burman of Isle. Wah-
kon imported some outside talent
from Duluth and Superior, including
Lindberg, their southpaw pitcher. 1t
was pitchers battle right from the
hop off and pitching honors were about
even. Lindberg proved to be the
luckier of the two as his teammates
slipped in two runs in the third inning
and the Onamia bunch were unable to
score at all. Wahkon's two scores
came in when Princeton, the visitors
heavy hitting outfielder smashed the
ball over the left fielder's head for a
triple with runner at first. The ball
was bungled on the relay in and Pat
terson tore for home in the footprints
of the runner just ahead of him. He
was caught at the plate but in the
mixup the Onamia catcher dropped the
ball and the umpire declared him safe.
Batteries: Lindberg and Lavalle for
Wahkon, Burman and Stelmach for
Onamia. Wood and Doane, umpires.
The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1919-09-04
Not a Sporting Proposition.

The Lawyer do you swear to
this remarkable story you have just
told?
The Witness yes; swear to it,
but wouldn't advise you to bet money
on it.