The Butler weekly times and the Bates County record. (Butler, Mo.) 1918-1950, 1919-02-06

| an incident o.
years ago. tn OUT community there
lived an old couple. They were very
devoted to each other and to their
church. But even christian can be
provoked to the point of doubling the
patience OF JOB Tor anybody else) as
this story will prove. Twas Satur-
day night. The old man had gone to
bed little early that his good wife
might wash his trousers (they meant
to go to meetin' next day.. After
washing them she placed them on a
chair in front of the fireplace to dry.
During the night one of the dogs
sleeping ny the fire. turned over
Gin his Sleep md upset the chair.
The trousers fell in the fire and one
leg was burned off (before the fire
compan" arrived. Next morning
the old man was rarin' and chargin'
He was terrible. His good wife did
her best to comfort him and said to
him, Nov pa, don't carry on SO.
Just be patient. Remember Job. "
Patience, hell said the old man.
Job never had the leg burned off of
his Sunday breeches, did hep. (P.
ST. kinda sided in with the old
man,
am convinced that the old saw
where ignorance is bliss tbs folly
to be wise is true. Adam and Eve
lived for quite spell in the same
neighborhood and must have met
frequently without realizing that
they were violatin' the laws of
"sassiety' in their manner of dress
Tor undress) as the case may be and
were or seemed to be happy-and it
they had remained in that blissfu]
state OF ignorance bare skin suits
would be more popular today and
much less expensive than the "all
wool" (cottonade) suits we have to
wear, to say nothing OF comfort.
opine that if the war had gone
on two or three weeks longer that
an infant born last week would Gf it
lived) have been perusin the casual
~ lists when said infant had attained
the ripe old age of Methuselah Tor
-t4tteee++tt- eee years
women as Newspaper Managers,
From the Los Angeles Iimes-Morc
than score of daily newspapers in
the United States are owned and &C
lively managed by women.-Well, |
KNOW OF quite few more men than
that who are owned land also active
ly manageu) by-women.
Goethe is quoted as having
said that what we don't unders tand
we cannot really possess. | want to
go on record as disagreeing with
Goethe. | can and do really possess
which | don't understand.
Something that no one past, present
nor yet to come ever did, does, or
will be able to understand. What is
it! Nothing but Ford. Il
T'o:her day l read of a lady ind
Kansas City who had worn to
church skirt made from pair OF
huDbv's trousers-as soon as ! could
| clipped the notice from the paper
and stuck it in the stove. Why:
Simply because ! don't want to dis
cover (some Sunday when the last
bell is ringin) that my Sunday
trousers are missin' and that all
nave to wear to church is coat and
vest. DO you get me!
A fellow got a bit fresh t'other day |
and said to me, Jim, do you know
when pig ceases to be pig and
becomes hawg?" 20, yes | re-
,lied, IL discovered that last fall
when you eat dinner at our house
A fellow who lived near me once
and who couldn't tell the tune of
Turkey in the Straw" from odd
Dan Tucker" told me he was thinkin
If learning to toot horn and jine
he band and asked me how he
should begin and l says, says l,
first of all see that the dues on your
lie policy are paid up to date. See
70 it that your last will and tesla
nent are duly witnessed and on rec
ord. Attend to any little personal
matters you have on hand. Be very
sure that your title to mansion in
he sweet subsequently, is perfect and II