davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Omaha daily bee., 1919-10-05
EDITORIAL.

The Btmble Bee again is in tn,
vanguard Of advanced thinkers or
one of the vexing problems OF mod
ern life-what to do for automobil.
storing space in the downtown dis.
trict.
The Bundle Bee has a solution
which will keep all automobile:
from being stored if the streets and
leave these highways open for traf-
flea as they should be.
The plan is to have the city buy
all the ground between Douglas and
Harvey streets and between Four
tenth and Seventeenth streets, re-
move the buildings and throw this
space open for automobile storage.
This property could be purchased
probably for about $50,000,000 and
then the removal of the buildings
could be done.
Think of the fine amount of
space this would provide for the
storage of automobiles. No more
cluttering up of the streets with the
cars. Rlenty Of room!
Strange that no one ever thought
of this solution before. it is not:
We Often Thought So.
Down- Stairs Values at Up
Stairs Prices,s says a display card
in local shop window.
Wonder What the Parson Meant?
{Cuming County Democrat)
In letter from Rev. l.. r.
Powell at Washington ILL.,. he
states that the purse of money
which was presented to him at
the farewell reception when he
left Grace Lutheran church, was
used to purchase just as good a
davenport as that amount OF
Omaha daily bee., 1919-10-05
Bouquet of Live Human Interest Stories About People
ELIGIBLE Omaha Bachelors
became bookkeeper and clerk for
the Trans-Mississippi Grain Co.
W. Vnu Rat HA Acrspted

became a bookkeeper and clerk for
the Trans-Mississippi Grain Co.
You Bet He Accepted.
He COPIED so successfully with the
books of that concern that the Up
dixie Grain company offered him the
treasurership of its company which
he accepted on August |, 1899.
After coping with this job and
also being manager of the elevator
department OF the company for a
number Of years, Mr.. Cope decided
to cope with business on his own
hook. And now at 400 South Nine
teenth street you can see on
window the words, Cope & Kear-
ney, Grain Merchants"
That's Elmer.
He's All of That.
Elmer is debonnair, a hale fell
low we'll met" a boon companion
outside of business hours, a club
man.
He belongs to the Omaha club
(where he lives in bachelor apart
HleHtSJ, the country CluD, the Fletu
club, the Chamber OF Commerce and
other clubs.
Elmer drives his high-powered car
like the heroes in the movies. He is
"a wonderful dancer" the girls say.
His men friends say he is "a won
derful poker player"
Neither Did We.
He is disciple of Lucullus. What,
You never heard of Lucullus? He
was the old guy in ancient Rome
that was strong for the eats. Gave \
feasts, y'know. where they had one
thousand $1,000 different dishes.
Well, Elmer likes to cope with the
eats" Yea, verify He likes that
thick, juicy beefsteak and those pate,
de fois gras and all that.
But he doesn't seem to be able to
cope with Cupid.
However and nevertheless, he may
do so some time.
Omaha daily bee., 1919-10-05
Offered to Buy Store---Boss
Objects to Clerk Taking Nip
The Man From York Went Broke and the Clerk Came
to the Front for Him-Next Day When He Got
4 His Wad He Was Duly Grateful.

Well, anyhow, as Bobby Gaylor
used to say in THE Little Arab" the
next afternoon about 2 o'clock the
man from York appeared at the
cigar store again. He was smil-
ing all around his mouth, which,
made considerable smile, believe
me. as the girl says four times in
every sentence.
You're good scout" said he to
the, clerk. 1--WE got some more
have some"
The clerk scratched his head,
glanced hesitatingly toward the
back of the store, and winked his
eye.
Sure enough" said the man. He
peered toward the back of the shop,
and lowered his voice to a whisper;
that is. he let it down until it it
couldn't be heard more than four
blocks. rs she a good looker?"
Its the boss" explained the
clerk.
Tell with him." roared the man.
"Trot him out"
The boss emerged from the
rear His expression indicated that
he had Come to ascertain who had
fired the Big Bertha in the front.
Il want to give this old timer a
drink, y explained the man from
York. Whats the kick?"
Its hardly customary" explains
the boss.
We'll change the custom" said
the mar from York. I'm going to
give this man a drink or. bust. How
much for the joint"
The boss smiled. 1t was one OF
those highly sarcastic smiles which
under ordinary circumstances
would shrivel man, up like green
persimmon.
1T would take slightly more than
So" he said softly. with a grim
glance around at the overloaded
sleeves.
The man from York didn't shrivel
5 cents worth.
Instead he took roll of bills from
his pocket, and hattened it on the
corner. IL made a bale about two
and half inches high.
SAY when" he said, beginning
to count. They were all yellow
boys.
The proprietor capitulated and
waved his hand to the clerk. "All
right" he said. I'll take a cigar
for mine"
What's the windun7
About 10 o'clock that night the
big fellow numbered in. He leaned
over the counter. He winked his
eye, grinned, and laid a scent
nickle on the pad.
where's the wads" queried
Voltz.
"Story's copyrighted" said the
man from York. Gimme smoke
I'm going home"
Omaha daily bee., 1919-10-05
Two Papers Ought to
Consult the Sheriff
About These Pigeons

Sheriff Mike Clark has received
from a Canadian expert full plans
and specifications for the construc-
ton OF. scientific pigeon loft.
Mike is a great pigeon fancier
and his special variety is the hon.
ing pigeon which finds its home
from a distance of hundreds or
thousands of miles.
ITS most wonderful thing,
says Mike. ITO think of turning
pigeon loose in Salt Lake City
and that it will find its way back
to Omaha. And not only that, but
it will find it's way unerringly to
its own loft after it reaches this
city.
Il never get tired specializing on
how it does this. No human being
even of the highest order of in
telligence could do that. We might
find our way by inquiring of other
people but we couldn't just get up
in the air in an airplane and fly
straight home The pigeons must
have some sixth sense that human
beings lack, which enables them
to find their way.
"Of course they have to be
trained. We take them out when
they are young and let them fly
back from a distance of about
mile. Even that is remarkable.
Then we take them five miles. Then
perhaps 20 miles and so gradually
work up to the great distances"
Mike gets expert hon1ing pigeons
from the expert breeders. He has
some from Philadelphia and other
distant points.
Omaha daily bee., 1919-10-05

court were discharged at once. In
only one case there were fines. And
these fines were not for spoonlng,
but lack of chiyalry, the judge said.
The Syoung men >of two couples
taken to ! the police station tor
spooning used what money they had
to bail themselves out OF Jail for the
night. They permitted the two
young ladies', to whom a few short
hours ago they had pledged indy
ing fidelity, to remain in Jail until
discharged in court the next morn
ing.
Next, the police commissioners
retaliated to counterfeit the lenlency
Of the municipal judges by raising
the spooning ante. Bonds for
spooners. which previously had been
$40, were hoisted to S5Ol for men,
and SOL for the weaker sex. This
proved to be cruel stroke. Before
the Judges could discharge spooners.
those unfortunates must needs cool
their ardor in deep, dark dungeons.
Spooning at the price of those bonds
was practically prohibitive. The
fancy of most of the young men in
volved had turned to love, not high
finance.
Omaha Youth "In Bad"
And the high cost of spooning
did not apply only to the domestic,
variety. There proved to be duty
on the imported spoons as wei.> A
young man, on a visit from Omaha,
took young lady out for motor
car ride. To put her at her ease.
orFbe polite or something, the young
man kissed the young lady. At this
moment the sspooners' nemesis,
Lieut.. Albert Reyes of the motor
cycle squad, whom many Kansas
City 'suitor would like to see tied
hand and foot with lovers knots
and fed to turtle doves, approached
and arrested the budding romance.
The girl tainted at the police sta
ton, arousing the pity of even a
Omaha daily bee., 1919-10-05
But What If Casey
Never Gets Close to
Those Golden Gates?

he following is an extract taken
from an |. w. w. song book, which
was found on the person of a pris.
oner at the city Jail
CASEY JONES'"
me workers on the S. p line to strike
sent out a call
But Casey Jones. the engineer, he wouldn't
strike at all,
His boiler. it was leaky. and his drivers
on the bum,
His engine and his bearings were all out
of plumb.
CHORUS.
Casey Jones kept his junk pile running
Casey Jones swas working double time,
Casey Jones. got a wooden medal
For being good and faithful on the 8.
p. line.
The workers said to Casey. Wont you
help to win this striker"
But Casey said, Let me alone, you'd
better take a hike.
Then someone put a bunch OF ties, across
the railroad track
And Casey hit the river with an awful
crack.
Casey Jones hit the river bottom,
Casey Jones broke his bloomin' spine,
casey Jones was an angelina.
Took trip to heaven on the S. p. line.
When, Casey Jones got up to heaven, up
TO the pearly gate
He. said. I'm Casey Jones. the guy that
pulled the S. P. freight"
You're just the man." said Peter, "Our
musicians went on strike,
You can get Job assembling any time
you like"
Casey Jones got Job in heaven,
Casey Jones was doing mighty fine,
Casey Jones went scabbing on the
angels,
Just like he did to workers on the S.
p. line.
The angels got together and they said 1t
wasn't fair,
For Casey Jones to go around a-scabbing
everywhere.
The Angels Union Number %, they sure
were there,
IND they promptly fired Casey down the
Golden Stair
Casey Jones went 10 hell a-fiyng.
Casey Jones" the devil said. ''Oh,
Casey Jones. get busy shoveling sui
phur.
That's what you get for scsbbing on
the S. T. line
Omaha daily bee., 1919-10-05
Missed Again.

On the range a party of recruits
were firing their first course. The
sergeant in charge noticed that one
of them. a man named Smith, was
missing the target every time.
AT last. quite fed up with the
mans bad firing, the sergeant went
across to him and told him to 60
and shoot himself.
: The man disappeared, A few
seconds later a, report was heard
from the spot where Smith Had gone
to. The sergeant hurried TO THE
spot and shouted:
".Are yolf< there. Smith,"
Yes sergeant" came the reply.
i've missed, again" &
Omaha daily bee., 1919-10-05

tod my neighbors about the luck J
had with my harvest help, and
when they were through at our
place neighbor who was much in
need of some help offered them rs
cents an hour, but they declined.
They evidently had the wandcrlust.
They explained that they were go
ing 70 the North Dakota harvest
fields. They just had the migratory
inclination in their veins and were,
unable to stay long in one place.
And away they went, but | was cor
vinced that little kindness is a
good investment even when hiring
farm help of this class"
Omaha daily bee., 1919-10-05
Livery Stable Not
So Easy to Find as
A Few Years Ago

Where can | find livery stable!y
Sounds funny doesn't it, but come
to think of it look around and see
how many garages have taken the
place OF the homes for horses. Pat.
Boyle, newspaper reporter, is taken
by many of his friends to be an in
formation bureau and the above
question was asked him by one OF
his friends who led a pony to the
steps of the Central police station,
where Pat obtains his news.
Il got pony and don't know
where to put it, he exclaimed. It's
a cinch you can't put him in here
Pat replied. After considerable in-
vestigation Pat located place to
put the pony.
Omaha daily bee., 1919-10-05

Elmer Ames Cope has been per-
fectly able to cope with every prob
lem OF life except the marriage
problem
He COPIED with the public schools
at his birthplace, Streator, H., and
COPIED successfully with the three
famous RS leaving them in a
state Of collapse and wreck with
vi their knowledge in his head.
In fact he COPIED SO successfully
with the "R" which stands for 'Rith-
metic that he became an expert
bookkeeper and, having attained
the ripe age of 10 years, he came
TO Omaha and, ON January I, 1898,
Omaha daily bee., 1919-10-05
Fat Man In Bluffs Is
Human Paper Baler
And Likes His lob

Walter E. Harkert of Council
Bluffs, weighs almost 200 pounds
and because of the fact ne is max
ing and saving money for his shoe
store. A paper baler is not at all
necessary in this establishment,
Walt takes the place of it.
Every morning Walt can be OBJ
served in the rear Of the store
jumping up and down. in box
crushing boxes and paper much
better than an ordinary baicr could
do. He says it is helping him to
reduce and it also saves the expenaae
of the store.
Omaha daily bee., 1919-10-05

lie was the kind OF man of whom
YOU have read as buying up the en-
tire shebang, hotel or store, wher
some cmploye failed to please him,
Just in order to fire the man.
And he was the kind of man who
looked the part, if you know what
mean, as they have taken to saying
lately i'll the SADLY Post stories.
This time he wanted to buy Out
the tobacco shop in order to give
his friend the clerk, drink, the
clerk being reluctant about accept
ing his hospitality owing to the pres.
cnce Of the proprietor.
1t was 1880 at night, here in
Omaha. The place was the tobacco
store. The clerk had nothing to do
for about 10 seconds, and had good
start on a sigh Of relief at having a
moments surcease from peddling CT
yars and doing the. Paderewski on
the cash register when the light
from the street was suddenly shut
off by the advent of bulky shape
in the doorway. y
II was man, and he looked ike
Guiliver's great grandson. Bending
low and turning sidewise he edged
in. The clerk gave him a quick
size-up, observed his extensive di-
mansions and the size of his
mouth. and opined secretly that a
man with a mouth big enough to
take a 10-cent cllaw for small bite
would have voice to rattle the
cobblestones.
The clerk was right. When the
man spoke it became apparent that
his voice was not only there, but his
breath was also. The voice scared
the bubonic plague out of all the
rats for a. block around and the
fuscl Oil on his breath curled the
Wrappers on the Pittsburg stogies
on the counter.
Say" he roared, leaning over the
counter as # to ooze a confidential
whisper. "I'm from York, and |
want some money"
Good boy" said the clerk,
what's the rest of the proposition?"
The man from York flashed
pin set with II diamonds. The
clerk took one look at it. The pin
was no Eskimo souvenir 1t was
geauine-possibly Sl75 worth.
so you're from York;" ques-
Toned the clerk, cycling the pin from
various angles. The clerk. it may
he interpolated, knows all about
York and Workers, but the current
leviathan didn't happen to be listed
in his own personal who's who. Il
suppose you know AL R-g," he
Questioned.
e sight over the plate rumbied the
nxn from York. know him and
!. hiss blinkety- blink-b blank bowlegged
brothkf. Go right on through the
brother, III trail you, I'll
trail Won.
oM, it happened that Joe. third
SA{6fbkr ofsrhe first named "Al" was
.isl only IN Omaha himself. but had
bees IN the cigar only half an hour
bcfofe, and at that moment was
A his shotel only three blocks
away The clerk so informed the
man. Tke mau grinned. He asked
'kor fl1e. number Of the hotel. Got it,,
ssisd called up joe.
e'fo Joe said he, "this is Bill.
~ This morning. I'm around
q t..sc Cigar store. Got some-
\ sl1 F.4yeif! All bright, I'll wait
" Y s,s.sss .isw minutes Joe turned up.
(. & fsaA : from J ork got his
SsSc5 they had interviewed,
said "sometling' and
NJ The clerk in on ~
rerfa;nv
Omaha daily bee., 1919-10-05

professional bondsnan. who bailed
her out. But the young man So
: journed in Jail over Sunday and
Labor Day. until the court sat
Tuesday, and the judge could allow
him to make all speed back to
Omaha, where life, liberty and the
pursuit OF happiness are still counte-
nanced
To such a pass are armorous
matters come in Kansas City TO
date. And there all spooning must
end in deadlock or wedlock, it
seems, at least until winter arrives.
and spooning becomes once more
an indoor sport.
Omaha daily bee., 1919-10-05
Gosh Durn En-.

An old-fashioned horse-and-bug
drove past Sixteenth and Farnam
streets t'other day. A twin six, two
Fords and Chandler roadster
stampeded at the unusual sight and
became unmanageable. Drivers OF
such rigs should be careful on the
streets. Always should stop when
they see signs of restiveness in ap-
preaching automobiles. I
Omaha daily bee., 1919-10-05

who's regular kink, with kingdom,
crown nall that. What's more he's
bringing his queen along to look
us over! Some class, what?
You Bet He is.
And didn't fate play right into our
hands by sending us General Wood,
ahead ofstinfe so we'd learn how to
act when the Belgian rulers get
here? And isn't Leopard some
king, even if he isn't crowned: Well
rather,
A single wave OF his hand and the
Omaha daily bee., 1919-10-05
THE DIFFERENCE.

Only a step from vandalism to
heroism. If the youth who led the
charge UP the steps to the third floor
of the. court house and was killed,
had been doing the same thing in the
war he'd be hero.
Omaha daily bee., 1919-10-05

Building a Jail on top of a million
dollar court house has advantages
and then again it has disadvantages.
Omaha daily bee., 1919-10-05

Now the wars over and the
worlds supposed to be safe for de
mocracy, it's some startling the way
new kinks are turning UP.
Seemed as though every kink in
Europe was either dead or down and
out before the Yanks quit breaking
the Hindenburg line, didn't it? And
here they are, poppin' up again
right here in our own little demo-
cratic west.
Old Ak is Different.
OF course, old Kink Ak has ruled
his merry followers one week year
for long. long time, but that's diff
ferent. He's real western king,
with democratic ideas, Then there's
Rink Corn whose kingdom extends
over many broad acres of the west
and Kink Cotton of the south. This
royalty we take for granted.
But now we have a kink who is
about to enter our happy domain
Omaha daily bee., 1919-10-05

, Civilization is only veneer-deep.
Omaha daily bee., 1919-10-05

money can buy in these times"
About two weeks after they
reached Washington, Ill, Rev.
and Mrs. Powell and Alice left
for Ohio where they spent about
two weeks with his folks. They
arc now back in Illinois ready to
begin their work.
PERSONALS.
You probably don't 2 take" the
London Times, but you can enjoy
the "nutty' ads in the personal col
umn of that great daily. Here are
few which The Bundle Bee has
clipped out for your amusement:
R-Preparing for your return. Anxious :?
BULL-Thinkng Of you. Send address,
Bunnie.
BAKERLoo Tube-still away. Write.
Should like to see you.-Elsie.
C-A-Will sender of cake from Paquebot.
Southampton, through Cox's, please en-
tighten r. E. T. BOX K-S92. The
META-And the purple flower is on the
ground.-Omega.
M.-MACHINE burst into flames 2l00 Sun
day, and was totally destroyed rs miles
from Edinburgh.-D.
50.-MANY happy rethrns.-44.
WHITE Star-Previous letter lost; phone
early if in town.-A. *
WEDNESDAY, April I'd, sos p. M, Pad
dington to Reading. Should like to see
you again.-"B,' Box 6s11, 2ss Oxford
street, w.
THE Greater.-You may consider you are
top dog. but wait.-The Lesser.
TWO Bachelors who recently advertised
for a domestic Housekeeper, thank the
81 applicants for their offer of services.
but regret that no more individual re-
plies can be made.
B.-RETURNED Thursday after very
pleasant trip--G. -
NINETTE.--I miss you terribly, but look
forward to- the day when you will join
me and when there will be no more
parting.-Adrienne.
Omaha daily bee., 1919-10-05
abpmE{b!l8 B&e6BnazzEin@s
~ u W-W- a. aERz -I-U

SUBALTERN tRegular), public school boy,
on sick leave, would like HOME for five
lnonths-Box U-442, The Times.
YOUNG officer (gentieman), no means.
requires PERMANENT HOME and good
4 JOB. Immediate de.nobiliza tion.) He
apologies for wanting to live.-Box u
434 The Times.
Observation-Disclosures embarrassed. too
honest eg, too proud borrow, wants
EARN f100 quickly. Who'll employ him,
evenings only BOX U-457. The Ftmes
HCMPTY-Don't fail me this time. Two
pink, one white.-PRINTEMPS.
N-WRITE plans; know all, have no fear,
love abiding.-M.
LADY. (39) very lonely. would ike 70
MEET ANOTHER similarly placed in
London to become friends.-Box Y-s4s,
The Times.
BILL.-Youve set me longing to see you
again.
Omaha daily bee., 1919-10-05

iuCttS. II you meet nlfn on the
street and he bows low and mutters
"All hail, your majesty" or some
thing like that, don't misjudge him.
He's merely rehearsing his part for
the reception.
Fancy Buck" Bowling.
As the kink has expressed a de-
sire to visit the stock yards, E.
Buckingham will also be preparing
for his highness. And here serious
complications arise. Can Mr.. Buck
ingham bow as one should bow to a
real kink: One of those back breaking
! bows that bring your nose within a
foot of the hoor?. Still. Mr.. Buck
inghan is a resourceful nnan-his
bow may be as low as Mr.. Ure's.
John w. Gamble, president of the
Chamber of Commerce, supple
man, IS expected to be most adept
when it comes to bowling. But
bows aren't everything in welcom-
ing royalty. Our efficient state de-
partment at Washington has advised
that their majesties' slightest wish
must be, considered. j
Show Her the Pest House.
An advance notice states that the
queen desires to inspect our hos
pitfalls. What could be sweeter than
TO have our little artist, D. Powell,
show ner highness through the we'll
known CITY pest house!
Was he not there himself for over
month?
Yes, royalty may expeGt real en-
tertainmept when it visits Omaha.
Omaha daily bee., 1919-10-05

Welcome. your highness! The
city is yours" Or whatever he is
supposed to say to real live kink.
No doubt Mr.. Ure is at this min
ute buried in volumes of court ETH
Omaha daily bee., 1919-10-05

carnival was closed. Another wave.
a little more majestic this time. and
Ak-Sar-Ben's parades were post
poned. A third wave and the car
nival was "reopened. And never a
protest. Some king, is Leonard I.
But to get back to lkink AL, OF
Belgium and his queen. Liz. Omaha
should be in fine trim to give 'em a
regular reception when they arrive.
It Will be Some Bow.
It's said that acting Mayor IRE
will bear the brunt of the reception
Omaha daily bee., 1919-10-05

i'll case the mayor is still disabled.
Fancy Mr.. IRE making a ,portly
bow, whatever kind of bow that is.
to his majesty and while Bonded
shout ioyouslv:
New-York tribune., 1919-05-02
Mrs. Vernon Castle Says
She's Not To Be Married
Dancer Denies Reported En-
gagement to Capt. Robert
E. fireman. of Ithaca

Mrs. Vernon Castle, whose husband
was killed in an airplane accident, de-
nled yesterday that she is to be mar
rlec to Robert E. fireman, who was
until recently captain in the aviation
service and is now head of hardware
lobbing firm in Ithaca, N. Y, as was an
ncunced in an evening newspaper
Mrs. Castle said that, although she
knew Mr.. fireman very we'll, she has no
intention of marrying him or any one
else at this time. Mrs. Castle is going
to the Adirondacks to-day to finish .
picture In which she is appearing for
the Famous Players Film COMPANY. ~
According to the story printed YES
terday, a relative of MIR. fireman
whose name was not disclosed. said in,
v'tations had been sent out to friends
and relatives to attend the ceremony,
1t was also said that the marriage
would be performed at the Little
Church Around the Corner.
Attempts to reach Mr.. fireman or
any Of his relatives, his father. Robert
II. fireman, being deputy governor of
the Federal Reserve Bank in New
York, proved unavailing.