Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1919-06-30
TALKS BY
BEATRICE FAIRFAX

and she hoped with all her heart
he would not be old. snuffy and un-
attractive. 1t did not make the
least particle of difference if he
happened to be all three, if her
father and brothers approved of him.
They handed over the poor little
sixteen or seventeen pawn who had
to curtsey. dry her eyes as best she
could and express her thanks for the
great honor the old and snuffy party
was comforting on her
Nowadays if girl makes a mar
riage of this sort it is almost al
ways her own fault. She can work.
and wait till the man of her choice
comes along. She does not have to
marry because the men of her fam
lily decide on some man as an elig-
ible husband. and leave her wholly
out of the family calculations-as
very probably was the case with her
great-grandmother
No girl who has a job in which
she is interested and who had learned
the joys of doing useful practical
work and being financially independ-
ent, and who has begun to get an idea
of woman's real place in the modern
world need even marry for any rea-
son but because she is in love.
A girl who is proud of being a
woman. and who has a sloriously
busy, happy time promoting I'M
portant things, does not have night
mares over the "old maid" idea. The
foolish words have absolutely no
terror for this sensible type or girl.
And you couldn't possibly use the
old fashioned taunt in such way
| that it would wound her.
No Sting in the Words
tirer
the term "old maid" from the time
| that girls stopped waiting passively
at home for somebody to come along
and marry them, though why any
| one ever found it in his or her
heart to laugh at so pitiful hgure
| it would be difficult to say. she was
| n woman practically uneducated and
wholly unframed. whose chief occu-
: patton in life was to smile and be
| agreeable till she was taken off her
| fathers hands. Wouldn't such a des-
| tiny be enough to sour and embitter
a saint. and do you wonder when
their smiles and little coquetries
! failed, and no man came to take
them, that the very word stood for
ridicule and failure?
Now work. wages and independ-
ence have changed the position oil
woment With the advent of these
things it has ceased to be favor
on that part of man to ask a
woman to marry him. On the con-
trary, he is asking one.
And on the mans side, his accept
ance to-day by a girl "bread-win-
ner" is a good deal more fatterlns
because there can be no question
! of the honesty of her affection
4 whereas in the old days he was
| ralPa Sc
from spinsterhood and "provider" OF
a home for the superluous daughter
under the parental roof.
And nowadays man cuts his
moods more. according to his wife
than in the old days when the en-
tire household rotated around the
gout of the head of the family, oi
If not his gout, then his pet crouch
or something else at which he fell
at liberty to vent his temper ane
indulge his tantrums
The girl who had lived at home
and waited-was used to a display
of temper on the part of the men oi
the family. They were spoken o.
as 1.-The Lords of creation" and il
must be confessed they did goot
deal to justify that title. Hei
father raised Cain" when he was
angry, and she looked for further
Cain" raising on the part of hel
husband as his constitutional right
But somehow or other the wife
who has had training in a profess
sion or business expects reasonable
ness and courtesy on the part oi
her husband and. what is more, she
gets it. She has come to regard
a display of rage and violence as
out of place in the home as II
ali q Tod
Well-balanced people do not go IL
for this sort of fireworks: there i:
a prejudice in favor of being safe
and sane" and that particular pre1u'
dice carries the day.
The war was largely instrumental
in doing away with the waiting
game" For patriotic reasons al
sorts and conditions of women took
Jobs, and, having taken them, they
found out how interesting and alb
sorbing work really is, and they have
been loath to give it up. even though
the cry for every available pair Of
hands is no longer so insistent.
want to beg the girl for whom
the term "old maid" still has ter
rors to take thought. Fit yourself
for some occupation or profession
that will be an outlet for your owr
energy and, at the same time, a
service to the community.
Your chance of meeting the right
man will be tremendously increased
coming in contact with more desir.
able men in the business world than
in what we call society" and II
for any reason you should not hap
pen to meet "the right one" your
DAYS will be less drab and your eve-
/ nfngs less solitary If you are vitality
| interested in something than IL you
/ sit-and wait.