The Richmond Virginian. (Richmond, Va.) 1910-1920, 1919-07-13

1t Is always hard to tell the whole
tale in one column about the Rotary
club meetings. The trip to the Boy
Scouts camp, on Tuesday, would take
several articles. and that is why this
one is being written now--so that the
record may be kept straight
After the gang had eaten all the
boys brunswick stew and fish, they
went out to the lake to see Aaron
Jacobs and Floyd Reams row the
boat
Aaron's invisible colored suit with
a red rose In the lapel, was the cyno-
sure of all eyes. Traynor. Walker Cot
trell Tom McAdams. and one or two
other expert swimmers, arrayed in the
latest Atlantic City bathing toys. sur
rounded the boat. and were just about
to rock It real swift, when Doug Free
man shouted:
Hold! Save him; he owes me
money"
Aaron was accordingly saved.
Following this incident the crowd
followed the scout master to the camp
fires around which the boys had gath
cred. and were singing weird song of
the aboriginees.
when say, kankakee, Yankee,
said the scoutmaster you say,
How"
You noticed" he continued by way
Of explanation, when I was at your
last meeting and anything was done
that pleased me. I raised my strong
right arm. and shouted, Howl That
meant I was nightly pleased with it.
How in English means Fine Bully
Great. anything like that
Then after Doug Freeman got
through making speech in the Chick
asaw language, everybody raised his
right hand. and shouted How"
Except Harry Cole. He couldn't
think of the word. and he was later
ducked in the pond.
At the conclusion Of the speech by
Dock Freeman. The Virginian dis
penser OF literary gems. asked him
for copy of his speech to print in
| full He rummaged in the rear poe
ket Of his boy scout pants and produc-
ed a wellworn bunch Of manuscript.
You will find here some OF my ex-
itemporaneous remarks" said the Dock
| in sort Of soto voce tone of voice.
II always make my speeches that
way I am always taken by surprise
when make speeches. and must.
therefore speak extemporaneously."
! The reporter went off in a corner by
! himself, where no one could see him.
and opened up. the MINIS. Here is
what he found:
/ Gentlemen OF the Grave Diggers'
union: 1t gives me the greatest pleas
ure to be with you today. l always
like to get acquainted with people with
whom I have to finally come into con-
ltact with anyway. whether wish to or
mot"
/ And again ladies'. the last time
appeared before this branch of the
| Epworth league. the sporting editor
had mixed the scores so that instead
of getting on the church page, your
proce edings were sandwiched between
the prize fight column. and the space
left for Damon Munyon."
again. gentlemen. when we figure
that the cosmos OF the predigested
germs of Anticipated monstrocities and
that Of the genus hypochondriac. are
lintermingled we have the modern day
discovery, the profiteer. and it would
be needless for me to mention to you
gentlemen OF the Academy of Medi-
cine and Surgery. that such a thing
would be utterly impossible, we're it
not for"
II am no politician. fellow MEM
bers OF the Henry Clay Political club.
but I do know that the time Is not
far away when in order to get their
votes you will not only have to kiss
their babies. but you will. fellow vot-
eTS. nave W MISS INC idAACo tHSAu-
| selves"
MY text, brethren and sistren. is
taken from the first chap. of the book
OF resolutions. tenth stanza. He who
follows the chickens, generally goes
home to roost. but before beginning
our discourse, would request the
brother In the back pew to throw his
cigarette out the window on the left.
II 20 out that way"
Following these reflections. gentle
men OF the Advertisers club. believe
that the man who does not advertise
his business is generally very busy
brushing out the dust and the cob
webs. while the man who does adver-
ttse. particularly in the paper to which
I belong. IL able to ride around in his
limousine. and carry an account with
the corner grocerynian. who may
even at that prove to be profiteer
upon his customers keen foresight"
And then again. ladies. II you
should care to learn the art Of knitting
socks for homeless kittens, you might
drop one-catch one-drop ee-catch
two, and you will nhd very neat and
pretty little design
- A~s -.