davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington times., 1919-11-16
The immortal ]. N.

The little story about the Immortal
J. n. published in yesterdays Times
recalls to mind my first and last meet
ings with ]. N. whose name, by the
way, was Freese, not Freer.
first met ]. n. when ] was city
editor of the Toledo Blade, two years
previous to the Chicago Worlds Fair.
He had been a friend Of Nasby's and
called frequently at the Blade office.
II was understood at that time that
he had become mentally unbalanced
during the civil war. At times he was
perfectly rational. At others he con-
sidered il his duty to remove the
pressure" I suppose I have heard
him use that expression scores, pos
sIbly hundreds of times. Among
others on the local stan Of the Blade
at that time who have made them
selves either famous, or notorious.
were Brand Whitlock, stephen w.
Bolles, J. Russell Thompson and Capt
Charles Coghlan, a brother OF Admiral
Coghlan. and of whom II was reported
that, according to Dana, he wrote the
best snake stories that ever appeared
in the Sun.
NV last meeting with j. y. was tne
wear following the louisiana Purchase
Exposition. was then on the edi-
torial staff Of the st. Louis Post
Dispatch. At that time HARRY DUN
LAP was managing editor. J. n.
STAYED around the office nearly two
weeks, being in and out several times
a day. He was still removing the
pressure" and proposed holding a
public meeting to explain how. His
face had changed considerably and
was as mild as a child. He wore a
little mustache and his hair was long.
Otherwise he appeared about as he
did years before, with his broad
trimmed hat and long. frock coat.
During those few days / remember
that we had visits from several noted
literary characters, IL so they may
be called. II was the occasion OF
Mark Twain's farewell visit to the
Mississippi valley. He spent a fore
noon about the office and stood for his
photograph. On the heels of hi~ call
there drifted in ]. WEST GOODWIN.
of the Sedalia Bazoo. and COL GRAD.
DOCK, of the Bourbon County (Ky.)
Democrat Then along came J. n. IL
would be hard to say which aroused
the most interest, Mark Twain. with
his shoe; OF white hair: Goodwin,
with his historical white beaver hat
I Col. Craddock, with his nearly i've
score years and "reminiscences of the
The Washington times., 1919-11-16
What About the Kaiser L?

To the Editor of TIE TINES:
Although l am only boy of six
teen, l have opinions OF my own. Nj
one great opinion is that the whoia
world Is asleep During the wal,
much talking was going on as t.,
what would be done to the Kaiser
Now the war is over and has beer
over one full year all talk Of tho
Kaiser Is dropped. Where are tn
people who said exile him? Where
are the people who said hanging wa,
too good for him?
Even though l believe in the BibIc
/ believe that he is the one enemy
that should not be forgiven. Tn,
Bible says that we shall forgive on
enemies. but the Kaiser has been tho
"ause Cf the death of many wome,
and children, and is probably sittin..
on velvet cushions, laughing at u.
whole world. Shall he escape from
The Washington times., 1919-11-16
Can't Insult Him.

1 enlisted in the navy and after
using my first three months pay for
clothes, insurance and allotment. I
finally received 81. then bought sSos
worth OF Liberty bonds
When was discharged ! was fnsn-
cially on the rocks. The only thing
that kept me from being a peon was
the fact wasn't in Mexico. I sold one
bond for ss+47, and bought some
clothes, and later sold the other two
at about the same price TO keep me
and my family from becoming a pub
lie charge.
Now, IL the Honorable Carter Glass
thinks that / would be insulted N the
Government reimbursed me partially
for just my loss alone, he is radically
wrong. 1 don't believe that he was
sincere in his statement when he said
that eN-service men would take IL as
an insult i have never known him
or any other high Government official
TO refuse anything. or question the
character OF the giyer.
EX-GoB,
The Washington times., 1919-11-16

can at least rest your mind and body for fifteen min
utes Then you go again. and you may live long
He advised all conscientiousy and as he advised them
HE WORKED HIMSELF TO DEATH His friends called
him. his patients called him. the hospital where he worked
for charity called him. doctors all the country camored
Tor his help and cooperation He the typical
ing American and he dead whereas he should have
been working at his best for another twenty years.
So much for able American representative of pro-
fessonal life.
Another American of great power E. r. Hartman,
the railroad builder He made hundred millions there
abouts But that represented small part of what he
to the country in properly rebuilding of its greatest
railroads and opening up territory
Hartman could build railroads. he could find hundreds
Of millions for finance he could take of all the prob
iems that present themselves from the Atlantic the
Pacific. But could not would not TAKE CARE OF
THE BODY OF E. H. HARTMAN. And he died. literally
killed by the fierce energy that drove him at age when
his real work should have been just beginning
Those that him in his Office in the middle of the
day thin, overworked man. eating hastily mouthful
that a clerk put beside him. and working as he ate.
Mr.. Hartman kept fine horses for the amusement of
his children he had found groom feeding the horse
and working the horse at the time he would have
discharged him He would have said the groom when
this horse works he needs all his strength to work When
he eats he needs all his strength to DIGEST Let him rest
after he eats
Every American business man knows enough to say
that about HORSE but not one in hundred knows
enough to say that about HIMSELF.
The folly that drives men quickly through life and
quickly into the grave not confined unfortunately to
the adults that control themselves
Children school, occasionally but in millions of
made the victims of driving process that Injuries
body and mind breaks down force produces the
magnificent crop of nervous American invalids
Children go school longer hours than they should 90
if all their work done at school They bring work
back with them sit down to the work Immediately after
eating, ruin their Digestion AND THEIR IGNORANT
The Washington times., 1919-11-16
% THE TIMES.

To the Editor Of THE TIMES:
NV son attends one of these port.
able schools, and 1 therefore wish TO
Ieuy some charges made by a gentle
nan some time ago in your paper in
regard to sanitation. lighting, and
comfort Of these buildings. ] visited
the school room on two occasions and
stayed about an hour each visit. The
windows open out at the top, thus al
lowing the fresh air to come in am
not blow in directly on the child; the
sanitation is as good as could b
found in any school in the city fror
my point OF view and the lighting and
heating are also all that they should
be Is II not better to have portable
schools and each child sit alone tina.
to be crowded and overcrowded in tho
large public schools, and thus spread
sickness? They have a nice clea'
room with new seats. clean floor, nice
light, ample black board space cover.
ing two sides of the room, and be"
OF all, smiling, but strict teacher
who takes pride in her school room
and pupils, and works with them T.
grasp the problems which will NEAR
so much to them in the future. Wha.
more could any one ask? / am cranl
about pure air, cleanliness, and sani.
tstior. yet l delight in telling tho
Washington public and the mother;
who are too busy to visit the portable
schools, about which we have hearC
such condemning remarks hurled
that they are absolutely all that the,
should be for the child's welfare.
only wish that the teachers re
ccived more pay for their pains, harr
work and patience, for / am sure the
deserve much more than they ar,
paid, and hope to live to see the day
The Washington times., 1919-11-16
Wants Discharge.

j was a prisoner OF war in Ger.
many for nine months, and suffered
hard treatment most OF the time
When / was released I was sent back
TO the United States as q hospital pa
tient. class d, No. 2, which means
that ! was UNIT TO do duty. On the
25th day OF January, 1919, was
again examined and restored TO duty.
Later / made affidavits for discharge,
naming my mother and three sisters
as dependents, but the papers were
disapproved. have been back al
most ten months and have seen sol
diers discharged by the thousands
Do you or anybody else think il is q
fair deal?
4 was the first prisoner from the
city Of Philadelphia captured by the
Germans. BB.
The Washington times., 1919-11-16
Why Editors Go Wild

Mexican war. or the Immortal ]. N.
All have since passed away.
During the week we printed several
pieces by J. \. They were published
just as he wrote them and all began
J. y. says" Each was about a stick
In length.
II was always a mystery 20 news
paper men where J. n. got his pull
with the railroads. For years he was
allowed 10 ride free on practically
every railroad in the Middle West L
DO not think he ever asked any news
paper TO furnish him Transportation.
HIRAM W. HAYES
The Washington times., 1919-11-16
SLOW DOWN.

which is inhabited, from time imme-
mortal by Greeks.
Yours very respectfully.
Committee of "Annunciation," Greek
Ladies Association: Ainarevivn
!. kajgoyjon, Catherine Ch.
Calfoglou, President; Loe \.
\. LlamOubi, Theoetisti II.
Hadjopouiou, Apolonie Vieanta-
filou, Photoni Raltsci. Helen NJ.
Sta nouli, Anastasie Cocoli. Ell
piniki Stamouli, Irene hpostolidi.
"Ste. Paraskeir" Ladies Benevo-
lent Association at Epivatae
(Thrace) Marie ID. Sterghiou.
Silivri tThrace), September 23,
1919. Mer of Marmora. S. G.
Ceriakidel, Sopia T. Cepranio,
Diri Doubria ton Epivatae
Dean Normal College, Archi-
geneia at Epivatae),
The Washington times., 1919-11-16
A Crabs Life.
Ru Mnru Krduse@ nAnrs-

II AAf IOuf O.
A crab is round and IL has four legs
and his front two legs he pinches
peoples legs with and feet too, and
Ii holds also whatever IL eats with
them too, and his back two legs he
uses them for walking and swimming.
On the bottom of the salt water a
crab makes his home and lives In a
little dark hole quite deep in the
water and away from land because
they are afrade OF people and fisher
men taring up their homes.
They eat small fish. dead people and
large fish.
Their enemies are people and fisher
men, which scoop them up with nets.
Once was crabing down in Florida,
because 1 like to crab and get a few
and so i went Grabbing and caut six
with my cousin and ] went to the
hotel and the jeff cooked them up for
me and they were good.
Crabs sometimes are eaten raw
with ketchup on them and are called
crab coktale, and It is very good and
The Washington times., 1919-11-16
HEARD AND SEEN
BY EARL WIN.

Thirteen Hundred and Twenty
dollars as a minimum salary for
Government employees has been rec
commended to the Reclassihcation
Committee. There is consideraol,
difference between THAT salary
and the $500 sub-starvation stipend
that is doled out year after year to
men who are called upon to do re-
sponsible work. Whether or not
there will come a day when 1920
is the minimum salary paid by the
Government is an interesting spec
ulation-but the recommendation
shows how minds are working.
No greater shame exists than the
low salaries paid to Government
employees unless it be the shame Of
the Governments neglect to provide
proper retirement and pension
fund system. This great big Gov
ernment, so rich that every other
nation on earth is hanging on to its
coat tails begging for credit, cash,
food and everything else-and yet
We are paying the men and women
working for the u. s. ut sub-starva-
ton rates. 1t induces a man to take
on Government job and trains him
for that job alone and lets him work
himself into the grave.
The reclassification committee has
turned up some remarkable facts.
One of them is the fact that the
United States has a gentleman nine
The Washington times., 1919-11-16

ty-one years old on the pay roll. He
has been at work since four years
before Daniel Webster died; thir-
teen years before the Civil wsrl
This possibly is a worlds record In
service for a government and q
worlds record in shame for a gov-
ernmental system which permits a
man TO work that long withoct re-
tirement on a pension.
believe that the Government
should have the finest system in the
country. We ought TO have the best
workers, at the best prices. We
ought TO fire the shirkers and -ay
the workers; and pay them well.
Government stars ought 10 be paid
the same as other stars. Men who
are using the best brains in science
should be paid according 10 the
worth of those brains. At present
the brain worker, the stoker, tho
plumber, the clerk, the errsnd boy
ALL are underpaid or mixed up in
1umble OF clsssif1cations and laws
that takes seventeen King Solomons
10 decipher aud 10 interpret after
they are deciphered.
The laborer is worthy of his hire.
50 is the scientist. So is the clerk.
Every man jack of them in the Gov
eminent service should be paid what
he is WORTH. There ought TO be
some way whereby the bov who Is
doing the country a service and who
is going TO make il a greater coun-
try by his work can be encouraged
and PAID. Until we get to that
point we are NOT going to get our
moneys worth of work even for the
small salaries we pay NOW.
The Washington times., 1919-11-16
Only Humans Sleep.

To the Editor of THE TIMES
! beg to take exception to you
statement in an editorial today that
the ant is the only living thing that
does not sleep. The human being is
he only living thing that does sleep.
Sleep is the mystery of the soul, and
he human being is the only living
thing that has soul.
J. G. BASHFORD.
The Washington times., 1919-11-16

Father Time Is Giving to the Hurryns American Some
Advice That Ought to Be Put Up at Every Street
Corner.
The Magistrate VIII Fine You Ten, Twenty or a
Hundred Dollars of Money If You Go Too Fast in
Your Car Nature VIII Fine You Ten or Twenty Years
of Life If You Go Too Fast with Nerves or Brain
SLOW DOWN!
The Washington times., 1919-11-16

AT the Left of This Cartoon You May See Sign
That Some Humorous Sheriff Has Put Up One of
the Roads Leading from Big City, The Automobile
Driver Who Sees the Sign Knows That Whoever Put
the Sign Up Means 1t, and He Drives Slowly for a
Mile or Two, Anyhow, Until He Gets Away from the
Sign On the Right Sids of This Cartoon, by McCay
The Washington times., 1919-11-16
Letters From the Public to the Editor

when they receive at least what some
Of the uneducated, frivolous Govern
mcnt clerks have been getting, Thank
you. MRS. A.
The Washington times., 1919-11-16
Slow Down and Live Longer
Too Much Time Devoted to Work and Not Enough to
Fresh Air. Costs Much in the End.

The graveyards of America are filed with human
beings that die too soon.
The average useful takes into the grave with him
at least twenty years of good work, lost forever.
This cartoon is that ninety out of hundred work
ing Americans NEED and unfortunately few of the ninety
win stop to pay attention to it.
man knows that his horse must rest and even his
engine of steel must have its periods of cessation and stop
to be examined and put in order.
No man would try to electric battery without
stopping occasionally to have it charged.
But the American forges that his body is engine, Of
very soft material the heart the motive power, and his
battery that must rest to be recharged like any
other battery.
Statistics carefully prepared by the Government tell
you about great losses that the nation endures
Insects destroy many billions in crops every year.
Rats destroy their hundreds of millions worth of prop
@ty.
From one single ship coming to dock and fumgated
with deadly gas while the matches battened down. they
took out two thousand dead rats and QUARTER OF A
TON OF CoCKRoACHEs The health authorities felt
proud to keep out all that destructive force They well
might
~ Fires that might be prevented hundreds of mil
Hons in loss; forest fires great drain.
We know that impure milk supply, unhealthy hous-
ing dirty cutters where children play and other features
Of civilization cost the yes every year of many children
The consumption germ alone carries away each year its
hundreds of thousands.
There is no lack of statistics as to what the country
loses through these msfornes through hail and flood
drought and premature frost.
But the greatest loss to the world and especially in
America that caused by the death of that die too
SOON
In the world of business science literature the valuable
asset is the of fifty His best work should be done
tween fifty and seventy And if he knows how to live
wisely ten be added and the best thirty years
found between fifty and eighty
Gladstone, Moltke, Pope Leo and host of others did
their most valuable work. at their very best work
ing forces when past seventy.
The man who dies in middle age represents, from the
cold calculating financial point of view loss infinitely
greater than represented in the death of young child
The man Of fifty has been a charge the community
for the first twenty years. during which he produced little
nothing The schools have taught him. fathers and moth
doctors and teachers have taken him and de-
voted time to him.
The farms have fed him. the factories have dressed
him. shoemakers have shod him Scores have contributed
to keep him alive At twenty he begins be useful at
thirty he is useful at forty still useful if he is
OF the right SORT and at fifty his really important work
begins.
AND AT FIFTY, OR SHORTLY AFTERWARD TENS
OF THOUSANDS OF THE MOST USEFUL AMERICANS
STOP SUDDENLY AND GO DOWN INTO THE GRAVE
The Washington times., 1919-11-16
FATHERS AND MOTHERS BOAST OF THEIR STAND
ING IN THEIR CLASSES

Thousands of children have become successful men
they have had the energy to resist the false educa
ing process that would crowd the mind and weaken the
nerves of a tired child.
If man had young colt six or eight months old, he
would not be proud to show it if it thin shaky
nervous creature He would not brag about it and say
skinny looking colt you there works late at night
and early in the morning and keep him driving all the
time he did say that, his friend would reply What
fool you not to know that the most important thing
tor horse of that age is rest and good air. and health
and pleasure"
The who would not thus brag about an over
worked undeveloped young horse will point with greatest
pride to thin. paefaced child, and say with swelling
chest that his boy girl is at the head of the class works
late at night and starts at it again early in the morning
And can't be pulled away from the books"
A man of middle age driven by ambition avarice
vanity habit may, if he must overwork himself throw
away the best twenty years at the end of his life.
But there is for foolish fathers and mothers
that overworkng their children ruin their systems
in their childhood and overcrowding their minds and
encouraging them in mental Indigestion make it possible
that they will be prodiges children, and in later life
thirdclass adults
SLOW DOWN
We here to look this world realize it's beauty
walk through it, NOT TO RUSH THROUGH IT.
Life is not steeplechase. Man should lift his eyes
the sky the the stars occasionally He should have
time for the trees and the green fields and for pleas
ure. He is body as well mind. The mind depends
upon the condition of the body The body that is merely
galley slave cannot produce mind worthy of human
being.
SLOW DOWN.
You do not lack warning Your tired mind as you try
to concentrate your tired legs and back you walk up
the stairs your restessness after eating thousand
ings tell you to SLOW DOWN.
Better do it, instead of having the slower and longer
lived grave digger say, Here another of those
that in too much of hurry
The Washington times., 1919-11-16

There are millions in this country booked for an early
funeral who know perfectly well that they living fool
ishy reckessly hurrng toward early death The trouble
with the American is that he KNOWS but will not use his
knowledge.
English French and Italians wiser They value
life, they know the worth of the later years They sop
they have done enough for that day begin fresh
the next day
But when the American has done enough he lashes him
self and does Finally he drives himself into the grave
when his best work should be beginning
Go to club of American business men where thew sit
without hats and you have trouble picking out the men
past forty. THEY ARE ALL BALD
Look closely at their faces and you will see them pale
the majority Of them with deep lines You see written in
those faces too much time work. enough to fresh
air and the making of blood that the brain must have
TO do its work.
Dr. Murphy, of Chicago, of the greatest surgeons
and danoscans that this any other country produced
constantly impressed upon his patients of middle age that
they must rest in the middle of the day.
Stop the engine, lie down. sleep for five minutes if you
The Washington times., 1919-11-16

our clutches? Shall he receive no
punishment?
Wake up you're asleep. l.. l..
The Washington times., 1919-11-16
Walks To Work.
Seven Cents Saved.
In Better Health

/ cannot resist the impulse to say
to you who are ever alert in cham
pioning those things which make for
civic Justice and righteousness, that
/ have appropriated your recent wise
and happy suggestion to resort TO
Walkers hack" since the burden
some cent fare went into effect
The result has been that ! am being
materially benefited in every possible
way. My appetite is better, ] sleep
better. my mind seems more alert,
and the good. sslubrious morning
air and ozone are proving q tonic
that has no equal. Every man and
woman should try il and then send
you a vote Of thanks commensurate
with the benefit derived. ! live as
far north as Park Road, and the
walk back and forth each day beats
the motor car all hollow. / offer
this as q suggestion to all those In
quest OF health, TO. say nothing of the
40 pennies saved each month. Az
stated above, since adopting your
idea i have become
A BEN EFTCIARY.
Why Editors Go Wild.
Like the poor, Earl, ! am always
with you. Witness exhibit A herein
under attached, head line and all.
And, as Mister Bugs Baer says,
Yours till the Crown Prince grows
a chin. WAYNE c. MARTIN.
EXHIBIT "a"
SHE is, rs SHE!
Times head:
MISS. DEMOCRATIC
BY BIG MAJORITY
The Washington times., 1919-11-16

then have crabstue with osterets xnS
IL Is good that way too.
The Washington times., 1919-11-16

AND AT FIFTY, OR SHORTLY AFTERWARD TENS
OF THOUSANDS OF THE MOST USEFUL AMERICANS
STOP SUDDENLY AND GO DOWN INTO THE GRAVE,
BECAUSE 7HEY HAVE NEGLECTED. THE WORDS
THAT OLD FATHER TIME IS SAYING IN THIS
PICTURE.
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1919-07-11
End Ready to
Welcome Home Veterans

Lykens, Pa, July 11.-EverythinS
is booming for the big celebration
to the homecoming soldiers which
is to take up three days beginning
July 20, Sunday after next. All the
committees are working overtime
and daily bulletins, putting forth all
the news are appearing daily from
the pen of H. f. Burlington, who is
publicity manager and general pep"
producer to the other committees.
The big event in the celebration
of the four valleys is the military
day, which is to be as closely as
possible a replica in detail of canton
ment and overseas life. Lieuts. Hoff
and Zigner are organizing that end
of it. and expect to put on the most
exciting and realistic trench scene
that has ever been attempted in this
country; in fact, 1t is warranted to
make the natives of Lykens and
Wiconisco feel that they are back be-
fore the 18th of last November.
Everyone in the vicinity is pushing
as hard as he can to make the cele-
bration the best in the State, and
from present indications they are
going to have just that kind of a
party. Several hundred discharged
soldiers are assisting in the prepara-
tioR of the program.