Weekly Caledonian. (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1919-1920, 1919-03-05

INTO the stage kitchen bya party
prominent in white overallS and the
door slapped shut in a manner that
Oci.ed the scenery. Then the baby
quit as promptly as it had begun and
to the uttermoSt part OF that house
penetrated apparently the opening
line Oh the play:
"My Gawd. If Jim Hoadley knew
| was here, he'd rip this place into
tatters"
Which considering that Jimmy
Hoadley never did anything more
spectacular than post bills for liv-
ing, struck Paris a. rather overdrawn.
Eoar.c whispers advised Mibb what
Tic trouble was, and she rose 10 the
dilemma
"Have you no friends, my good
woman" she asked earnestly.
"No! If had" retolted the Hoad-
ley woman, "they'd take George Grif-
lin out and lynch him."
1t was several moments before OF
der was restored
Come, rest awhile, my DEAR"
struggled Nib bravely onward. Then
in an undertone: "--please don't
spoil the play at the start, Amy! Do
your best for the sake of the rest
of U.S."
The appeal in Mibb's voice softcnc1
the Hoadley' woman somewhat and
for wonder her baby kept quiet.
\She looked back and saw her retreat
cut off and for the sake of the ugly
pr&dicament of the rest she decided
to pull things somehow.
"AH, right she agreed. Then a.
loud and to the stark astonishNlent
of the Gest on the other side the
set: "H&s deserted me! He's desert
ell met" she suddenly cried. And she
staggered &agnificently across to the
sofa.
1t was the Audiences turn to gasp.
The Hoadley wpman's last audible re-
ference had beep to Georgia Griffin
and Paris battcd \the public eye. Was
she referring perhaps to Jim Hoadley.
The Hoadley womAn's name was not
on the program. Was juicy bit OF
dramatic scandal being promulgated?
1t was an awful halfNWoment!
"Cripes" said Georgia weakly, 81
see where I need Il drink"
But the Hoadley woman went on:
Gle deserted me and left me penni-
less. I'm sick and dying. Have pity
on Il poor unfortunate sister and care
for my child. Heaven will ! reward
you! and about its neck you will find
Il locket that that
eyes, ycs!" cried Nib. t"That
what, my dear?"
Chat Identifies it so that We can
kin it tomorrow" bawled George
from the wings.
But the Hoadley woman had faRcn
back apparently dead! \
"Tha poor, poor motherlcss littN
thng!" went on Mibb picking up thd
threads of her mangled lines. And
she went to take the infant from
the apparently deceased mothers
arms.
But would that brat consent to be
taken by Mibb any more thar by
Mrs. Stacy? Not on your grand
mothers tintype! Nib acquired it
by the laying on of hands but it was
like picking up a twentytwo-pound
chunk of bowling wild cat. That
child knew it was on the stage and
hogged the scene with every last
trick of cheap actorine Mibb tried
to comfort it and get a word in be-
tween breaths. The other players
came on as they were supposed to
come on but not a word could get
across the footlights. That infant
kicked and fought and squealed. The
scene was finished somehow in pan
demonium of terrific bawls; and
Mibb got white-faced fearing it would
go into commissions. Slug Truman
suggested she lay it on it's stomach
and George Griffin from behind made
some frightfully suggestive panto-
mime with his property hammer and
all the mothers in the audience said
it was a shame to abuse a child so
but what could you expect from that
Hoadley womanAshe never had
brain in her head anyhow. Again it
was up to George to do something
and again George did it.
"Run down the curtain!" he
ordered.
The curtain was lowered but did
that child notice it? No. 1t was
very peevish child and set in its ways.
Its mother leapcd up, once the cur
tain had fallen and took it and patted
it on the back and laid it over her
shoulder and said let her get out and
take it home and George said yes
for Gawd's sake let her. And the
Hoadley woman postponed settling
with George until more suspicious
time and the audience followed that
child in all its journeyings for the
next three minutes, twice around the
stage and downstairs to where the
mother got her wraps and down the
'tairs outside and along the wall of
he opera house under the east
and down the street until
nerciful distance made the episode
'nly a nightmare.
And Uncle Joe Fodder in the front I
ow remarked that "Out of the ;
mouths of babes and sucklings the
Lord may have ordained truth; but .
ot that Hood1av c,,oL1;nri II ~