Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1919-08-07

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! President Wilson has opened his own drive
on food proiteers. He is to deliver a message
on the subject. May suggest that mes
sage will have about much effect on the
duck. There is only one way TO stop prof.
teering, and that is for the government to
take control of marketing, eliminating the
middle man, the fellow who produces nothing
but grief to the consumer.
Captain Archibald Roosevelt arrived in
Chicago the other day to make his home. The
next day he was sent to a hospital. This ill
ness is nothing" he told reporter. Wait until
he gets the doctor bill.
Fifty thousand Chicagoans have signed a
petition demanding reinstatement Of Cy De Vry,
keeper of the Lincoln park Zoo dismissed by
the park board for alleged disorderly conduct.
counter petition has been placed in circula-
ton by the park board. But the public has
not lost faith in Cy. And he'll be back in the
old job, in time. Even the animals are calling
for him. He may have erred, but the mistake
was Of the head and not of the heart
American shoes are said to be hit IN
China They are kick in this country.
The actors now are threatening to strike
because they are not paid for Sunday work.
Did you ever see an actor work?
Chance for Some Bright Mind.
Sir: An Associated Press dispatch came to
my notice the other day relating how bomb
placed by Italian terrorists suddenly explod-
ed" killing FIVE That's the trouble with prac-
tically all of those bombs-they're so sudden.
If some one will offer good working attach
ment to cause them to go on with more delib-
Grafton he will earn the thanks Of a grateful
aristocracy. X Y
The former kaiser's hair has turned white
What was it a famous poet said about the
frost on the pumpkin?
Someone has rightly said that the man who
invented the near-beer had mighty poor
ception to distances.
prof writes to recommend that Brandy
wine, n. Y, be changed to Antiwine.
owing to a misunderstanding announced
an elder to a church congregation in a nearby
city, "the supply arranged for in the absence
Of the regular pastor has not appeared, conse-
quentIy there will be service The congre-
CATION will rise and sing Praise God from
whom all blessings iow,' and be dismissed"
Captain Archie Roosevelt has taken job
with oil company. He says he does not
know what his duties are to be. Wen hazard
a guess that he'll be merely an advertisement
to sell stock and products.
One of the most difficult jobs to make good
at is that Of being the son Of famous father
The paradoxical thing about the airplane is
that it is not much good unless used up
Now that the big war is ended the smaller
nations of Europe can resume their battling,
which really never has ceased.
Oscar Hammerstein, the opera impressarfo,
was buried in New York the other day. The
theatrical profession stood with barred heads
the funeral passed. Hammerstein won his way
into the affections of the professional world by
his artistic boldness. In his productions he
kept his eye on the stage, and not on the box
Office. He made and lost millions in backing
his Judgment and ideas. The stage is better
for his having lived.
Grave diggers in a cemetery at Long Island
City have struck for increased pay. Another
answer to the question, death where is thy
sting?
Even the cost OF kisses is on the raise In
Chicago the other day man was fined $25 for
taking one. The price formerly was SO.
What has become of the old-fashioned
friend who used to ask you Us it hot enough
for you?"
Two personal letters of former President
Taft got into the public prints. and he wrote
the Associated Press that they were Of con
fidential nature and should not have been
printed. But the Judge ism u angry. Inc Judge
doesn't get mad. He's not of that tempera-
ment. He merely feels hurt that his confidence
should have been violated.
Leon LAghteheart has obtained a marriage
license at Rockford. Well?
Sometimes woman would rather get nerv- !
GUS prostration than not to have her own way
at all.
I. i. W. e. f. y?
J.MC