davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-06-29
By RoLLIN LVNDE HARTT
By RoLLIN LYNDE HARTT.

lerton to do his work for him. When Lardner showed up, it was always with an imperturbable air of innocence, and the same air of innocence enables him to get away with the widest jokes. For instance, he had a perfectly insane, poiutless, idiotic >yarn which, by pre- arrangement. his friends Joe" Farrell and 'Bob" Cantwell would intersperse with uproarious chorting. The yarn would run like this:
 "Onee there were two little girls named Pat and Mike Gaughter) and they lived in Buena Terrace Screams of naerrimenD, and they went out across Irving Park boulevard (whoops
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-06-29
RUNNING A "C,OTYITM g

all too sperspicuously, at refreshments on me.
 RUNNING A "COLYUM"
 Now, it is Beelzebub's own job, run hing a daily column. I, have tried 1t. Before six months were up, I yearned to chuck that job and devote the rest of my allotted span to the infinitely more frolicsome task of editing obituaries for the Gehenna Evening Sob. There is nothing so ghastly as being humoroua to order, Nothing! A professional daily joker has said, You wake in the morn ing and find seven little red devils point ing their wicked forefingers at your and yapping, "ScintilIate, darn you! Scintil- late!
 And yet, cross my throat and hope, to die, do believe Lardner enjoys it. Cfum though he looks and acts, he is a rol- licking, dappled merry -go-round of blithesome ideas inside-personal ideas, oftentimes-ideas he would never let out ill talk. Give him a column, and, so to speak, he puts his little hand in ours and tells us all Are there tag days? Lardner reflects how poyerty-striclzen he is (poor fellow, he was reputed to be getting only $2S,00O a year when I last saw hip) and announces a Lardner tag day for the relief of Ring W. Is there new infant at Lardner's? Thanks to his column, he can start contest to se- feet a name TOT the Inlanl ana keep II raj ging swe xiksertaihmtairftaihm raging six weeks He loves these inti. mate disclosures. Once he wrote, with transparent accent on the last two syl- lables) satisfaction, %If Secretary Daniels needs another destroyer may we not recommend our youngest?"
 HIS OWN HERO.
 And in his finished worlS-that is to say, his boows, you have invariably the notion that the hero is Ring Lardner himself Permit me to reach for the
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-06-29

An English inventor has patented 2 process for so treating the edges of paper money that. when placed in d photograph of his invention they pro- auce words attesting their genuine ness.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-06-29

Women form the majority of the workers in the textile trade inx nxI,anca- shire, England, and, also form she bership.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-06-29
No. 8-Ping ". Lardner

NO. o-E1Qg w. GdTuuSI
 r-nM. RIGGS, the cartoon
 <bH8#lHaFD ist buckeled down
 to work one morn
 .Asg1 ing and had barely
 I1-1 sketched out a
 --SsS f=e comic strip entitled
 AA~ "Wonder What s 2 .. B. :. ;. <: <: ::. !. x. ... MFsI4#Ji8Eh2A Thinks A b o u | - k -WiM% his old and dear
 24 friend, Ring Lard
 % ner, whom he had
 Ts'ssZ not set eyes on for cES-,sssssT-- six solid years. Tall, dark shaven. well groonsed. (ktrictly pomme de terre, and as solemn Sas a tongue-tied owl, Lardner nodded Eilently. selected a chair, sat down, toolz out a newspaper. read it for a ihalf hour or so without speaking, and }then, as silently as he had come, got up, nodded, and walked out On one side of the family Ring Lard fner is descended from Peter the Silent, and on the other side of the family he is descended from a cigar-store Indian. Well may the poet sing:
 'Lardner wouldn't gigle, Lardner
 wouldn't smile,
 Lardner wouldn't chuckle, for it wasn't ]Lardners style;
 ! Lardher is as solemn as a half a ton t of coal
 And you couldn't tickel Lardner with
 a ten-foot pole.9
 In Miles, Mich, where he was born. Lartner had a job in the express office. while his brother worked on a news paper. One day an emissary from the South Bend News came over to engage the brother'sl jervices, but by a blum der got hold Of Ring instead. Without batting an. eye, though fully realizing the humor of the situation, Ring ac- < cepted the offer, and thus began his l journalistic career.
 VI While tearing around with a base H ball team developed genius for h missing trains and wiring Hugh Full
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-06-29

The dbddess of Liberty was created by the French convention in 173s and
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-06-29

hour of need and say. Congratulations, old top! Now you're famousi and hint. all too sperspicuousy, at refreshments on me.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-06-29

which gave me the jumps, and caused my friends to rally around me in my
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-06-29

And, my stars! What a lime Lardner tfoi I cannot persuade myself that it was an,
The Birmingham age-herald., 1919-06-29
$40 Suits and Dresses for $24.95

Dresses of taffeta, satin, geor- gette, crepe meteor, crepe de chine, foulards and in all the various combinations, such as only The Ideal carries. Shown in every color imaginable and beautifully trimmed with bead and embroidery. You'll want one when you see them at this price.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1919-07-31
ADOPTED new WAY
|. IN KILLING VICTIMS
Turks Decimate Greeks
Along Black Sea Coast by
1'ParboiHng' Them.

NEW YORK, July 30.-Charges that
Turkish officials decimated the Greek
population along the Black sea coast.
100000 men, women and children liy-
ing between Sinope and Ordou. with
out the shedding Of blood, but by
"'parboiling" the victims in Turkish
baths and turning them half
clad out to die of pneumonia or other
Ills in the snow Of an -Anatolisn
winter. are made in a letter from DR..
George E. White, representative of
the American committee for relief in
the near east, made public here
today. e.
sinope was the birthplace of. the
philosopher Diogenes. Dr. White re-
calls, and Ordou IL just beyond Cape
Jason. which is stiil preserved In
memory Of the >Argonauts and the
Golden Fleece. The letter, written
to Prof. J. P. Xen1des. secretary OF,
the Greek relief committee here, de-.
scribed the new method Of Kidding
the land of its Inhabitants, which, 1t
that employed by the Turks against
The worst Of the crimes laid to the
Turks, accordings to DR.. White. were
committed In the winters Of 1915 and
1917. when orders were issued for the
deportation of the Greeks along the.
Black sea coast. IT
The people. he wrote, were crowded
into the steamrooms Of the baths In
Chorum under the pretense of "sani-
-tary regulations" and, after being
tortured for hours. were turned, out
Of doors into snow almost knee deep.
and without lodging or, food Their
garments, which had been. taken from
them for fumigation. were lost. ruined
or stolen. Most Of the Victims. Ill
clad and shivering. contracted tuber-
culosis and other pulmonary diseases
and "dfed In swarms'' on the way to
exile, the letter declared. 49,
DR. White said that in the province
of Bafra. where there were more than
20, 900 village Greeks, now less than
Il, 900 survive. and every Greet set.
Element has been burned. The num-
Der of orphans. including some Ar
menian and Turkish children, in the
entire district, 1t was said, aggregat-
ed $4,000. Since the armfstice. the
doctor wrote, many of the deportees
have been returning to their ruined
homes.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1919-07-31
THE WEATHER.

For the District Of Columbia and
Maryland-Partly cloudy weather,
with probably showers tonight and
| Friday; not much change in tempera-
ture; gentle variable winds. mostly
south and southwest.
For virginia-Partly cloudy In
south and probably showers in north
portion tonight and Friday; warmer
in extreme west portion tonight; gen.
tie southerly winds.
For West Virgtnia-Showers and
Fthunderstorms probable tonight and
Friday; warmer in east portion to-
night.
Records for Twenty-Four Hours.
The following were the readings Of
the Thermometer and barometer at
the weather bureau for the twenty
four hours beginning at 2 pm. yester-
day:
Thermometer-Yesterday, 4 pm, so:
8 pm. IS: IL midnight, 20. Today. 4
am, So. 8 am. II. Maximum. 81. at
Is pm. yesterday; minimum. IS. at 2
am. today.
Temperature same date last year
Maximum, 70: minimum, 81.
Baromster-Yesterday, 4 Pm: 1901;
o p.ll.s HC.OSs IL iuiulIS uts OWL = "
day, fam. 5000; 8 am. 5000.
Condition Of the Water.
Temperature and condition of water
at am; Great FaIls-Temperature,
so; condition. 30. Dalecarlia reser-
voir-Temperature 81; condition at
north connection, "a; condition at
south connection, %. Georgetown dis
tributing Observation-Disclosures 81;
condition at influent gatehouse. Is;
condition at effiuent gatehouse, IS.
The Sun and Moon.
Today-sun rose. 500, am; sun sets.
1921 pm.
Tomorrow Sun rises. sos am; sun
sets, 1921 pm.
Moon rises. 10:4s am: sets. 1881
pm.
Automobile lamps to be lighted one
half hour after sunset.
Up-River Waters.
Special Dispatch to The Star. ,s
HARPERS FERRY. w. Va. July 81.
and Shenandoah rivers
both muddy this morning.
Weather in Various Cities.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1919-07-31
JAPANESE UNIVERSITIES
PLAN TO ADMIT WOMEN

BY Gable to The Star ana CAieags
Daily News. CepyrightS 1913.
+ TOXIC July 25.-The Waseda and
Keio universities. leading private in-
stitutions Of learning holding ideals
Of Independence in thought and free
dom. are arranging . plan to admit
women to their college of literature
provided they are able. to pass the
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1919-07-31

competitive examinations. In case
they do they are welcome.
/ This project, which shows the apirit
of progress Of the present age, awaits
the sanction Of the authorities.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1919-07-31
81 Profit on Pair Of Shoes.

Mr. Dawson Insisted that profiteering
is a live issue. more interesting to the
people than the peace treaty, even. to-
day. He said friend Of his had priced
been told they were $12. This friend
had a friend in the shoe business. He
wrote and asked to have similar pair
of shoes sent him at wholesale price
and got a bill for IS.
Miss Nora James Of the woman's
union in the bureau Of engraving and
printing, with membership OF 1900
women, offered the services of the
union to aid the committee She said
that while 20 per cent Of the women
employed have dependents, their pay
ranges from $2.37 to 1888 day Many
of them have to work outside to make
ends meet.
National Board Of Farm Organiza-
lions. said that there was q dangerous
lpropaganda spreading through the
country, attempting to fasten upon
the farmer the blame for the present
high cost of foodstuffs. He said that
such propaganda made for bad feeling
between the consumer and the pro.
Queer and widened q gap already too
wide. He said that the people In the
cities should be told the farmers side
Of the story and insisted that the
farmer was not making huge profits
Mr.. Lyman urged the need of a great
movement to point the way to CO.
operative buying. He said that iso-
lated associations usually went to
the wall because big trade organiza-
tions boycotted them.
Land Tax Urged as Remedy.
BENJAMIN c. Marsh, secretary and
director Of legislation of the Farm
ers' National Council. urged upon the
committee the need of handling the
question Of the high cost Of living
from national standpoint. He said
that the government should own the
railroads, the natural resources of the
country, and that excess profits taxes
should be enormously, increased. He
urged, too, that the tax upon land val-
/ mes be increased. He said that IL the
tax upon the land in the District OF
Columbia were increased to 3 or 4 per
cent it would bring prices of land
down and rents would have to fall.
too.
of cooperative buying associations
and cooperative business associations
Of producers. He said that entirely
too much is expended in advertising
now, and that much. Of the advertis-
| ing cost which necessaries now bear
could be eliminated II the cooperative
, purchasing and selling organizations
were developed.
SIN the District Of columbia during
the war the increase In rents has been
inexcusable," said Mr.. Marsh. There
| is no solution for this increase and
the high cost of dwellings. but for
Congress to levy high taxes upon land
spectators of the city.w He opposed
| the continuance of the half.and-half
plan and said that Washington should
| pay all its expenses
Sergt. Jaferies, who said he repre-
scented an organization OF soldiers and
civilians who desired "the abolition of
| censorship. the return OF freedom of
speech and free press. and the re-
form Of the military court.martiai
was needed was free competition"
! and that such free competition In
trade would result in reducing the
cost Of living.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1919-07-31
KoHGo 10 HAVE AIR LINE.
One Of Purposes Is to Conduct q
.Cartographic Survey.

BRUSSELS. July 10 Correspond
encs Of the Associated Press).-The
Belgian committee ON aeronautics has
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1919-07-31

decided on the creation Of = line "a
hydro-airpianes for the Konso esi.'
ony. Besides mall and passenger
transport hydroairplanes are to an.
dertake an important cArtogrAphf0
mission covering thousands OF milsa
with q view to establishing the car.
Biography Of the Kongo river.
King Albert has contributed to thu
special fund Of the mission and sls0-
for the necessary flying machines.
The Persians have Q different name
for every day In the month.
The annual number OF pilgrims 10
Mac - often exceeds 100. 900. II ,
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1919-10-08
LOSS TO NEWPORT
We'll Known DIR. Gould Goes to Utica,
N. Y, Where He Will Build.

O1u;no to the poor health of DR.. 0.
Could and the necessity of closing
his office and spending the winter IN
Florida. he has permanently removed
from Newport to Utica, N. Y, Wnere
he has shipped his household gooos,
purchased building site and expects
to erect a residence in the near Iu-
ture.
DIR. and Mrs. Gould left Newport
the middle of September for Utlca,
where they will visit relatives before
being joined by Mrs. Gould's niece
and husband of Lyndonville and 60
In the departing of DR.. and Mrs.
Gould, Newport loses two OF It's most
popular people, who will be greatly
missed in the business and social af-
fairs.
DR.. Gould was born in Barnston, P.
O.. in 1854, moving with his fathers
family to .Irasburg when he was II
wears of age With the help of
brother, two years older, he managed
to support a family of eight persons
on a small farm and pay off mort
gage. He began riding with DR..
Green of Coventry, who was treating
him, and soon mastered the primary
medical studies, and it was then he
decided to study medicine at u. V. NJ.
This was in 1873. His work at col
lege was interrupted by sickness at
home, and within three years he bur-
ried his mother, brother and four
sisters, but in 1877 he graduated from
the college of medicine, spent Ia
weeks at Harvard medical school and
read medicine with DR.. Carpenter of
Burlington.
In August, 1877, he married Miss
Ella Rowell of Coventry, and the fol
lowing February commenced his
practice of medicine in Greensboro,
where he continued for three and one
half years, at which time sickness
overcame him, which lasted for
year. When recovered from this
sickness, he began to practice in the
town of Coventry, where he contin-
ued until his health again failed him
three years later. A season in Den
yer, Colorado, restored his former
health and he went to Derby and set
tied in May, 1886. In 1891 his wife
died and for several years he made
his home at the Memphremagog
House.
In 1893 he married Mary Caswell
Lawrence of Newport and the great
er part of the time since has been
spent in our city, where the doctor
built up an active and lucrative prac-
tice in this immediate vicinity.
He is a member of the Orleans
County Medical society, knight
Templar of Malta Commandry, and
has host of friends in this place and
throughout the county.
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1919-10-08
Newport
Blay Gets $4,000 Damages.

James w. Blay, chauffeur for the
late Ex-Governor George ID. FrouIy'
who was killed on the tracks OF tne
Grand Trunk, two miles north OF
Waterville. Que, in August, 1919,
,uo,, verdict of S14,687.50 in United
Ctotas district court at Windsor from
tbe Grand Trunk railway. The jury
wrought in verdict after three
hours deliberation.
Mrs. Prouty, widow of the ex-gov-
ernor. who sued the road for S3OO,oOo
and $1,000 for the loss OF the auto
mobile, lost her case when 1t was
tried in federal court at Newport
early in the summer. :,
The suit of Blay against the rail-
road was in federal court about a
week.
Mrs. Prouty, before Blay got his
verdict. filed a motion for new trial
but this motion has not yet been de-
cided.
The accident which resulted in the
two suits happened the morning OF
Aug. 19,1918. Mr.. Prouty was killed
outright and the chauffeur badly in
iured. The railroad claimed the Prou-
tv car was driven at high rate of
speed as it approached the crossing.
Blay claimed the bells at the crossing
were not rining.
Testimony that was not introduced
at the trial of Mrs Prouty's suit was
brought into Blay's case. Physicians
testified as to Blay's nervous shock,
and that the accident untitled him for
further work along his line. Drs.
Blanchard and Gaines of Newport
testified for Blay and disposition
was read from DR.. Lynch of Sher-
brooke. Dr. Allen of St. Johnsbury
testified for the railroad.
An electrical engineer and a for
mer employee of the Grand Trunk also
were witnesses or Blay.
The plaintiff introduced evidence
to indicate that the roadway ap-
preaching the Waterville crossing is
so outlined that it would be impossi-
BILE for a car to be driven more thar
25 miles an hour.
( There is no indication as to whether
the railroad will take an appeal. Blay
was represented by Chas. A. Prouty
Albert W. Farman and Ward Prouty
of Newport The Grand Trunk was
represented by John W. Redmond OF
Newport.
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1919-10-08

before the footlights. But these
young actresses are financiers and
philanthropists, and their labors are
entirely for the hospital fund. The
little entertainment given Saturday af-
ternoon Melted S1.75 and was so much
applauded that it will be repeated
in a few days. The program was
carried out entirely without assis-
lance or coaching. Watch the date.
Help the children help the hospital
fund
Joan of Arc, Ensemble
Beautiful Ohio, Lucille Goodwin
III Say She Does, Ensemble
Dance, Mildred Pomroy
Till We Meet, Claire Coburn
Lucille Goodwin
Dance, Josie Pomroy, Airline Lyford
I'm Forever Blowing Bubbles,
Ensemble
Dance, Fern and Doris Turcotte
How va Coin to Keep En- Down
on the Farm, Ensemble
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1919-10-08

During the absence of the family
clever thief broke into George Kit
tredge's house on Beebe road and got
away with $3.50. Mr.. Kittredge was
at the Laball farm cutting silo corn
and Mrs. Kittredge had taken the
team and gone to Newport to carry
a visitor to the train Two little
boys, sons of Rufus Brown, a neigh
Dor, who were watching cattle near
by, said man asked them, els Miss
Kittredge home?" They replied that
she was not, that she had gone to
Newport. On Mrs. Kittredge's re-
turn little girl came over to ask if
she was expecting company, explain
ing that a man had been walking
back and forth in the rear of the
house and looking in the windows on
the back porch.
Mrs. Kittredge at once looked at
the desk and found the lock forced
and two pocketbooks rified of their
contents. The entrance was made
through a woodshed.
The Brown children described the
man as being of medium size, and
rather light complexion, wearing q
green felt hat and dark checked suit
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1919-10-08
DAVID SMITH, AGED MAN,
HANGS SELF IN BARN.

David Smith, an old gentleman, who
for some years past has made his
home in the family of Allie Blair,
took his own life by hanging Monday
afternoon in Beebe. Mr.. Smith had
been in poor health for some time and
it is thought his sickness affected his
mind.
Funeral services were held We'd
nesday afternoon from Mr.. Blair's
house and interment was in the Beebe
cemetery.
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1919-10-08
AID HOSPITAL FUND
Little Folks Get So from Self-Planned
Show in Garage.


A show was given Saturday after
noon by a few of the little tots of
Ihlrd, Pleasant and Prospect streets.
In Emery's garage, for the benefit
OF the hospital fund, and So was real
The garage was converted into a
real stage, with flags and flowers in
PERCUSSION and the following program
was well carried out:
Selection, vic+rol.
Song, GOOD Afternoon to YOU"
poo;+4. Company
InseciIaIlon, Payson Davis
Dcance, Geneva Hayes, Olive Wilkie
H 60ng, Bubbles, Company
C, Olive Wilkie
2Heiection, Victrola
BBanee, Butterfly, Vivian Peabody
Olive Wilkie, Geneva HAYES
LIE Mickey, Company
Dorothy Hayes and Alvara Farman
S+ar Company
Much credit is due these children
ana especially Geneva HAYES. who
Planned and directed the affair with
rare skill. Win
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1919-10-08
First Piano AID in New York.

New York's first piano advertise
ment was printed on Jan. 10, 1889.
John Jacob Aston, whose store was at
81 Queen street, "next door but one
to the Friends meeting house." was
the advertiser. He announced the sale
of "an assortment of pianofortes of
the newest construction. made by the
best makers of London"
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1919-10-08
EASIER NOW THAN.LATER

tits easier to break up cold or check cough now
than it will be later Persistent bronchial coughs tina
chang on all winter pave the way for serious throa
and lung diseases. l. w. Day, 6s Campbell Av., E
Detroit, Mich, writes: 'Foley's Honey and Tar re-
lieves of bronchitis very quickly. Ihope to
have it again. This reliable family medicine for the
lief of coughs, colds, Group, hoarseness, etc. con-
tans opiates. Children like it.-Sold everywhere
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1919-10-08

Sunday forenoon as Mrs. Mary
Clark and her father, Willard Miller
were returning from church, while
attempting to cross the street, Alex
Hebert in his fathers car, backed out
of the Brainerd garage, struck and
knocked down both Mrs. Clark and
Mr.. Miller. The victims were taken
at once to DIR. Gilfillan's and after
ward removed to their home. Mrs.
Clark has a broken arm and is badly
bruised about the head and Mr.. Mil
Ter 1t is feared has several broken
ribs and other minor injuries.
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1919-10-08
A Revolution In
Talking Machines
See the very latest
I'm talking machines
Repeats the record
eight times

You set the dial at |, ?,
8, or up to 8, and when
machine has finished play
ing the record, it moves
the arm back to begin
ming and plays through
again.
You do not have to
touch it. When it has
completed the number Of
times you set the dial for,
the machine stops.
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1919-10-08
Another Little Folks. Fntart.;n
tainment.

When Mr.. and Mrs. Rodney Co.
ourn want an evening of musical
comedy or vaudeville they lust call
on tnelr young daughter, Claire. who
gathers in her talented little friends
ana tney put on "show'' which ;s
I'm funny from behind the sno,.re =