The Washington herald., 1919-04-18

New York. April 17.-Thoughts while
waiting for your wife at Broadway
and Thirty-fourth street: How Herald
Square has changed. Only the owls
on the Herald building left Why
don't she come on. Wonder II the
McAlpin still serves those tall ones
with short collars. Too bad they can't
decide to give the worixingman a mild
brew.
No more Book beer signs. Someone
has their goats. 'Zas q good one.
Little Joe Weber getting OF a street
car. Why don't he use a limousiner
Funny about him and Lew Fields.
Just got tired of looking at each other.
they say.
I'll wait ten more minutes. then 60.
Don Marquis. Of the Sun. Is getting
stout. No one will believe 1t is his
real name. Still no one Will believe
my name is Odd. Woman with the
red parasol is Nora Bayes. Gotta
theater named for her now. Some
Jump for a chorus girl.
Blue Pete, the old blind man. Is still
here. Told me once he was happier
since gunpowder blew out his eyes.
The little ''wig-wag' man has a Job
directing traffic here. Suppose he gets
about so a week.
When she does come she will get
piece of my mind. Sid Mercer wear
ing a cap. They're getting stylish.
Cute little thing in the red tam o
shanter Is a pip. Who's that with
Senator Burton? Seem to be lot
of japanese chauffeurs lately.
Hope Lee Kugel doesn't try to dis
cuss the league of nations with me.
Never knew which one Of the Shu-
berts that is. Here she comes now.
No use to ouarrel on the street corner.
At various times in New York the
Brooklyn Bridge has been sold. So
has the Flatiron Building. Even the
circus rights to the Zoo in Central
Park have been disposed of. But here
Is a new slant.
Just outside the Waldorf there Is .
big scale on which the patrons of the
hotel are welcome to weigh them
selves as many times day as they
wish. There Is no charge.
The other day the house detective
stepped out to the scales to see a
young chap in the uniform of a sailor
ask a man to step UP and be weighed.
He had just purchased the rights to
the scale for S. He said he formerly
lived in Peru, Ind.
There is talk Of Futurist play ap-
pearing on Broadway. 1t would prob
ably take about five minutes. For
Futurism requires chiefly imagination.
Thus: Curtain. Scene: Bare stage.
Cow ambles out and eats a caviar
sandwich Church chimes in the dis
tance. A C5ist back-drop depicting
rage. Curtain.
Public restaurants and theater lob
bies are the scenes of begging nightly
by men in uniform A clean-cut young
officer at Shanley's the other night
grabbed a beggar by the nape OF the
neck. escorted him to the street and
gave him the end Of his highly-polish-
ed boot. OF course. some OF them are
fakirs. but many are men who care
nothing for disgracing the uniform.
On the other hand. the begging Is
awakening New York to the realiza-
ton that she must provide jobs for
soldiers at once.
Down by Brooklyn Bridge is a card:
Just back from Chateau Thierry
where / lost an arm and a leg.
solicit your patronage" The owner of
the news stand formerly clerked in a
Nassau street store. Several people
have stepped up to his stand and
bought and left large tips. which he
quickly and with scant ceremony re-
turns.
Il am not begging" he said. II
painted the sign because America does
owe me a living and l want 1t. But
don't want charity. I couldn't get
any kind of a job but this"