Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1919-01-22
MUCH IRONY IN DON'TS
EOR CHURCH MEMBERS

MI Oh IRONY IN nON'TS
FOR CHURCH MEMBERS
church Membsrs 'S' was repi Sn!s w iGf
ne irony for which he is famous,
He !Hon are som, some Of them them: -, :. ,
do, come late. II It's 200 vet. TOO dry.
700 hot. too cold. TOO windy, TOO dusty.
don't come. OF course the preacher
You expect him to be there Don,
imagine the front seats were ever in
tended for YOU when YOU go 10 church.
People might think you were interested
If you got up under the pulpit.
TRAISMEN PLACE LOADED
CARS IN THE FRONT
II used 10 fire for the Northwestern
Railroad ! can run A locomotive; IL
she blows out "A cylinder head breaks
side rod or throws a tire. ] can I'M
couple her and bring her in. ] used
to fire for the Northwestern Railroad
carry little card that let's me ride.
And SO VIC used TO. when we made up
freight train, put the loaded cars
in front and the empty ones behind
because 1t pulls easier.
Don't for the world ever think of
praying for the preacher. No. or the
church. Don't sing. When You come
10 the tabernacle or go TO church. don',
friends. on the huh OF a ship. Don't
sing! And don't attend prayer-meet-
ing, and II YOU do why don't take part
NEVER GIVE PASTOR
AM ENSOURAGEME
You know Paul said women should
not speak in meeting. Yes. but
will tell YOU something why he said
so. 1t has no more reference 10 me
and you than wearing sandals instead
of shoes. will tell YOU some time
tell his. faults to everybody you see.
and>if his sermons help you. don't le;
him know il. but IL he says something
you don't like. get busy.
n I,n nttI
ence, don't shake hands with him be-
cause II you do he will come back, and
he might go 10 heaven instead of hell.
lie might fall in love with Jesus Christ
and hate the devil il you showed an
interest in him. Let him alone.
LET THE PASTOR
DO ALL THE WORK
Never try to bring anybody 70
fiji UP the old ice house. Let the
pastor do all the work. The general
does all the fighting while the private
sit around under the shade. smelling
the coffee boil and the bacon fry. See
tina, his salary is always behind time
He can work down here and board up
in heaven.
III he doesn't visit you as often as
xoM ih.nk he s., should or that You de-
nothing particularly 10 do but to wait
on you. lie only has to preach two
sermons a week, and run the prayer
reop!e. and settle individuai ' and
church Guarrels. and visit the sick. and
n n6ay VIII ,hs dyi1ES and eGlsc,
nm Just TO look nice and amuse you.
- lie hasn't any.hinE. special to do.
ACTIVE CHURCH WORKERS
Try and run the church. II you
see ANYBODY willing TO take hold and
help with the church work. he sure and
OF being bold and forward. And never
speak TO anybody abou, Jesus Christ
i@nr pastor should do ali that kind
don't lie particular about how Gods
house looks inside or out. but keep
candeiahra OF wealth on Your floor.
ne chufch is good enough for the
,hiTyy-h hSinc ingram; Insist on your
brought mp before the church. And
apn.t give IN for the majority This
rule but in the church. the tall wacs
the dog.
NEVER LET MINISTER KNOW
WHEN you ARE SICK
pastor know anything about il. DON,
5G!a nm. lie Is supposed, to lind out.
,ii,G i, ne doesn't then tell people how
never came near when you were sick.
=. H US, h het my .ifc just by, look ing
doin.' You've got just thai kind OF -
nap on you. II you see anythins
%oTking harmoniousiy, ge, busy and
Try ana stir M a fuss"
NJ SUNDAY closed his sermon with q
Wci'-to!d incident OF q Dakota blizzard
ahq or the woman and the baby who,
( following travelling mans advice in :
Stead OF thc brakeman's. got OF nj III.
| wrong station and went 10 their DEAN
| IN The snowstorm
w nat direction are you giving IN
nc people In your home" concil,ded
NJ. sunday What directions arc vou
! FlNlnR IN YOUR sOCictN2 EollnmInr rnn