Mountain advocate. (Barbourville, Ky.) 1904-1935, 1919-07-18
JUST FOLKS
LAWYERS

John says he has had experience
with two who gave him his present
opinion of the legal profession
One Of these lawyers opposed John
in court and the other was for him
John says the first fellow beat him
and the other fellow lost the case
and there you are and what chance
did he have? Indeed, yes. but never
theless and not withstanding and
without the slightest desire to SUPER
impose the reflections of our super
lative intelligence on a suffering pub
lie, still
Lawyers have their uses!
Those with contradictions to this
observation please step forward.
None! Therefore we come to the
ground root of our argument which
is that lawyers are just folks and
useful.
For instance. one of Barbourville's
distinguished sons does something
especially distinctive, not connected
with getting into the penitentary,
and it is desired to do him honor.
How do We do it? We decide on a
public meeting, commonly called
mass meeting on account of the
fact that there is generally a bakers
dozen present at such affairs and,
when the grave question as to
what we shall do is brought be-
fore the thoughtful citizens, on
whom do we call to express the
thoughts OF the great, dumb, oyster
like brotherhood, known as Mr..
General Citizen? The lawyer, of
course. and we appeal to these
Caesars of the body polite because
they have ideas and know how to ex-
press them. Ideas are what the
world pays for and it is the legal
luminaries of our great county who
can and do express them. We lay
men may have ideas, but they are
like the pearl that the oyster shell
guards and which only Occasionly
sees the light.
Whom then, l repeat in thunder
GUS tones, or should so thunder were
| possessed of the necessary legal
lightning, or on whom, do we call
to solve the vexed question? The
query is to provoke our disabilities.
There is but one ancwer. The Legal
Profession.
While we unlegalized ones have
been Tuning under the collar, wait
ing for one solitary ray of intellf- |
gence to trickle into our cellular
gray matter, the legal collar of our
Blackstonian friend has remained |
seated calm in the knowledge that |
above il rises a dome of thought |
well versed in the art of penetrating
labyrinths, finding a passage thru |
or of developing the
sixth sense to the Nth power. The
united gray matter of the assembled
unlegalized ones at last receives an
Inspiration, cry comes out of
Binks! Binks!
Calm, cool and with perfect sang
froid, Binks rises. clears his organ
reeds and begins.
Mr.. Chairman, friends and fell
low citizens. You do me too much
honor in calling on me when you
have such oysters among you as Mr..
Silent, Mr.. Dum-Dum and Mr.. Fizzle.
However, to our muttons, as Spencer
says in the Fairie Queen, (don't look
[ up As | understand the ques-
ion, Mr.. Chairman, and | believe |
10 understand it, the object of this
meeting is to decide as to how We
hall best do honor to Hon. Jones NJ.
5inkle, recently returned from Afri-
"a. where he sought out the benight-
ID, shiTtless African and bestowed
lpOn 1893 of these the garment of
'uT civilization. These shirts, gentle
men, were flannel that they might
asst the longer and therefore be a
more lasting testimonial to the great
'eople who were so moved by the
ARE suggestion Of a bare skin that
hey sought this means of removing
What might become a public menace
rom the world. Mr.. Binkle is
for the statement that I
lsny OF the Africans insisted upon 1
utting their legs thru the arms of
be shirts. and this is but an
ther irTefragable proof that s