The Logan Republican. [volume] (Logan, Utah) 1902-1924, 1919-03-08
HICKEY GETS DEMOBILIzED


form and ALL" exclaimed Jorkins, as
Hickey the Fan breezed into the restaur-
ant $50 you're out of the army now, old
chapw
"Yea, DO. l got demobilized at Camp
Dix yesterday" answered Hickey, with
delightful grin as he shook hands. "An'
if joy was coin, I'd have the Fourth Liber-
ty Loan lookin' like buck private's bank
role copla laps ahead of pay day. No
more reveille at 5 a. m. / can duck X.
p. without bein' N. G. with the G. o. No
G. /. cans to manicure. No A. w. q. u. to
worry about. can't get S. 0. l.. with the
0. d. an don't hafta watch my Ps and
Qs when the M. P.'s r givin' me the 0. 0.
if I'm out late in the p. M. In camp
usta get soaked the whole darn army al
phabet but, gosh kid right now Pm 0. X.
"Why thought you liked the army?"
exclaimed Jorkins.
on said gumfull," chuckled Hickey.
"When Bill Hohenzollern was the Kaiser,
/ was glad to be in, but now that the Kais-
er's Just plain Bill Hohenzollern, Pm glad
to be out. But don't leave no one kid va
about the army, DO. It's great stuff, an
va get lot out of It'll busted into it with
good clothes, bad cough an tired feel
in, and came out of it with honorable
discharge, twenty more pounds in weight,
a service stripe, swell workin' knowl-
edge Of toll, lottsa pep an barracks
bag.
"The army sharpens up your wits an
learns va lots of stuff, too. Now, you
take Vincent Reilly, one of my buddies
which was in my squad. Vincent was so
dumb when he first busted in that he usta
salute the 'Y' an K of C. secretaries, say
Hello kidv to the End Lieutenants,
couldn't duck detail no better'n chorus
jane can duck publicity, an usta pull a
Parade Rest at taps. But now he can
stay on Kitchen Police longer an accum-
ulate less work n the Mess Sarge hisself
He can whistel Reveille an Retreat thru
his teeth, bawl out a guy as good as a
hard-boiled Top Sergeant, an could al
most walk up an slap M. P. in the eye
an still keep coupla jumps ahead of the
guard house.
''The army learns va that the pen is
mightier than the sword in coppin' off
pass to town, an that if va do to others
like they do to you you'll geta court mar
tial for bein' disrespectful to officers. va
learn that all things comes to him who
waits, if you're a good waiter an can
wait long enough, nd that swell abb
is abomination to the Top Sergeant but
q very present help in time of trouble. va
learn that all men r. free an equal unless
va forget to say Sir to a brand-new End
Louie or try to horn into the officers
mess, an that plain buck private is the
equal of any other army guy except on
pay day an the other twenty-nine days
of the month.
Before va slide into the army, va don't
know the difference between a mess-kit
an supply sergeant Can sometimes
there amt any as far as you're concern
ed), but after va pour yourself into
khaki uniform an get a army cereal num-
Der hung around your neck va get wise to
the old proverb that the Lord an every
guy in your company love cheerful CIV
er. Before va get thirty bucks per va
don't know the difference between the
Corporal of the Guard an Right Dress,
an va maybe think the Officer of the
Day quits work before it gets dark. But
before va get soaked company punish
ment many times in the army va learn
how to stand lotta things besides Reveille
an Retreat
ITS real healthy life" commented
Jqrkins.
1T is,' grinned Hickey, "if va watch