The Breckenridge news. (Cloverport, Ky.) 1876-1955, 1918-07-17
Secretary Gets Chance to Show
All He Knows.
GRINS And KEEPS At IT
Solves conundrums With One Hand
While He shovels Out Smokes and
Writing Paper With the Other
Mostly He Knocks Out Three-Bau-
gers and Homors, but Once in
While He Fans.
Trom the Stars and stripeso

prom the Stars and Stripes)
Have you ever hung over desk in
a Y. NJ. G. A. hut long enough to get
a slant on the questions the gang hurls
over the mound to the secretary be-
hind there?
They are like the Question Box col
umns of 80 Siwash newspapers rolled
into one, and the way the old boy with
the red triangle on his sleeve bats at
'em and knocks out three-baggers and
homers with 'em is sure a caution.
OF course, sometimes he fans, but
then what would any fellow do after
he's been handing out all day long p.
A. at % centimes per each, swapping
Scent American postage stamps for
soap wrapper French money, shooting
lot of bull to crowd of rufnex to
write home to mother, or cashing post
office money orders for 5000 or $7.S5
when the rate of exchange is ST., and
then some doughboy asks him how to
write letter to his brother In Montey-
niger.
Grins and Goes on.
WOULDN'T that make any ordinary
cuss rear up on his hond legs and blow
off steam? But the "Y" fellow Just
grins and goes to it. can't help think
in sometimes that fellows Just ask a
"Y" man lot of fool questions to see
If they can get his angora. For in
stance, here's some / heard with me
own eyes yesterday afternoon in 10
minutes while l was waiting for a
"Y" man to look up and see if Bloody
Mary killed Queen Elizabeth or If Bes-
sic done the trick to Bloody Mary.
SLOW do you spell 'provincialismY"
Imagine X. p. pulling that, will you?
How much postage does it. take to
send a hanlly with Souvenir de France
broidered on it?'
Then some crophead what looks like
he's doing =. G.. work at Sing-Sing
asks: "Where in hell is a. Z. o. 9jGO?"
Then II big fat slob of an Arbuckle
from the Pill SINGERS comes in with a
caddoky over his sergeants chevrons
and springs this one: whats the
French word for kiss?"
Then lollypolly second loot blows
in. "What was the date the LOOsi-
tania sunk?" asks the loot.
Then comes in a couple of colored
boys from below the Wright and Dit
son line and they buys some plug and
sweet chocolate, and one of 'em leans
over the counter like he was feeling
for the rail with his right foot and
wanted at the same time to whisper to
Harry in the white coat that he was
awful thirsty but he didn't have the
confines to raise gusher, and he
says low-like to the Sec:
How Is This One?
"Say, boss, me and buddy wants to
know If you all was ever serving bah
in the caffy of the Jeffson hotel in
RichmondT
Fancy sprlnging that on "Y" guy!
Then along comes a fellow what
used to be cavalryman on the bor-
der. He was one of them hard-boiled
ones what spit rust.
"Say," he says, looking as prominent
as the white citizens committee, "who
was the guy in the Bible what had
thousand James all to hisself, and was
there Jew named Joseph who was
5. O. l.. cause he had fancy overseas
hat and his pals couldn't get none at
the @. MI" ...,,., ,- -,
Wonder what struck him? Must have
got religion all to Oncet.
Then a pink-faced mommer's boy
strolled in to get some writing paper
to write II love letter to his Lizzie and
l got so darn Disguised that they let
a thing like that wash his mess kit in
a u. 5. pan that just thanks the "Y"
man and turns around and goes to
work and splits on the floor and beats
it.
Gee! them Y. M. c. A. fellers sure
ought to have the Crooks de Gurr, all
right.