The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1918-11-28

THE EMME
I'd strangers, seem to be dwelling to
re gether in harmony in this sign in
re restaurant in a neighboring town
g "Don't make fun of our coffee-yo,
W may be old and weak yourself some
s time"
e The following epitaph, written or
!. a scrap of paper was picked up on the
n streets few days ago:
, Here lies the body of Sarah Ann.
Safe in the arms of Abraham:
It's very nice for Sarah Ann,
. But rather tough on Abraham.
= = z
! An American captain found a Ger
man prisoner at railroad station in
a recaptured French town. The Ger
man had lost an eye, ear, leg and arm,
and his face was all smashed in. The
captain gave the wounded man 10
francs. Thank you, captain; you
have a kind heart" said the prisoner.
kind heart, hell" came the reply.
you're the first Hun have ever seen
who was shot up to suit me-.
q 4 z
"The whole company then gave up
their arms. | knew it was the kaiser,
but if he had moved would have shot |
my last bullet into him." says the
Dutch sentry who held up the Hohen-
zollcrn party What pity the kaiser
didn't feel an insufferable itching on
his ear just then-what lot of sub
sequent worry he would have spared
the world
A soldier writing to his father says
that football game between the engi- :
neers and the medical corps, recently
played in France was one of the wick
eldest he had ever Witnessed Both :
sides were out for blood, and the fact
that no one was injured he attributed
to the hardened condition of the play
ers, seasoned to many months of Sc
we're training. About five thousand
French soldiers witnessed the game, :
and afterward one poilu said to Ser
seant Eddy: "If that is what you Yam !
Sees call play, I'd hate to see you :
light
In spelling list for class in a
certain school were the words singing
md singeing. The class was asked to
write sentences using these word to
how that they knew the correct mean
ng of each. One little fellow wrote:
The Italians are a singing nation"
The Allies will soon be singeing the
eard of the kaiser" With sideward
'lances he watched his teacher mark
is paper, and timidly asked: eyes"
he said, but the kaiser has no beard;
e has mustache." 81 know, know,
ut wanted 100 on my paper, and !
ouldn't spell mustache."
z Z Z
A Scottish farmer was being in
tructed by a Government official as
, what he was to do in the event of
aid by the Germans on the east coast
Scotland. can hiv | RELY tae dae
lis wi a ma beasties gin the Ger
ANS me?" the farmer asked anx-
usly. eyes," was the reply; "all live
ock of every description must be
landed and driven inland" The old
as looked the picture of despair
)earie me-! he said. Pm thinkin' I'll
lie an awful job wi ma bees"
A bachelor reader of The Index
rites for information as follows:
What is the proper thing to do and
Y when you happen to walk suddenly
% room and find a young lady sitt-
z on young mans lap?" Giving in
rmation on such subjects is the long
it of the great family guide. There
E three things that will relieve the
assure. The first and perhaps the
st is to yell "fire" and run scream
. to the neighbors. The second is
point the finger of scorn at the
lily pair and stand there until the
M has been successfully disarrang-
The third and most unnatural
nix to do is to crawfish gently out
the room, close the door quietly,
ting the knob slip around to its
&c without click, and then go
under the blue vault of heaven and
at the eternal stars and dream
the days that are gone, Maggie,
en- you and | were young" The In
trusts that our bachelor friend