Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1918-08-06
Stories From Tit.Rifs


feature of village life at Fuzzleton, and
on one of these occasions the local
operate company essayed to play a
musical piece written round the story
of The Mistletoe Bough."
To be brutally candid. the heroine
was not success particularly as a lvo-
calist. Nevertheless, the play proceeded
till that good lady was imprisoned in
the old oak box. kindly lent fer the oc-
casion by John Smith. who presided over
the Fuzzleton, stores. The only hitch In
the proceedings was that the lid of the
box closed with an audible click at the
critical moment is-
Stealthily the stage manager sidled
up to the grocer, who occupied one Of
the front seats. -.~ .-r -. p
THE lid of your box is locked" he
whispered. painedly.
rs she goin' to sing any more?"
queried the grocer.
Yes came the reply. Her spirit
appears in the next act, and she sings
twice.
oh, do it?" snapped Mr.. Smith Then
I'm goin' to lose the keyn'
When the wealthy employer Of the
old governess died and left her $500,
her friends and neighbors wondered
whether the faded little spinster. who
had had such a hard struggle for life.
and had only been able just to keep
BODY and soul together. would gain
much comfort in her old age from this
windfall
They called upon her in a body next
day.
well now, Letitia. and whatever will
you do with all that money? You'll nut
II oy, l suppose in the bank, and"
Put 1t in the bank?" flashed Letitia.
Nothing of the kind. I mean to have
some enjoyment out of it, lte never
had much of time so far, but now I'm
going to indulge myself All my life
I've wanted to have a pair of side.
combs with glass heads on 'em, and
now--now I mean to have 'em. Yes,
thats what I'm going to get. I don't
care how much they run to even II they
cost me as much as FIVE shillingsv,
About Christmastime every year 4
clergyman goes to a farm a few miles
out to have a days shooting He ia a
very poor Shot but generous piyer
facts we'll known to Jack, the at.
tendant.
Last Christmas he was out shootinr.
ana rabbit jumped up about ten yards
away.
Bang went both barrels, but bunny
escaped with whole skin. ....
Did l hit him, jack" asked the par
son., in an excited whisper.
Well" said Jack, thoughtfully "r
couldna say 'zactly as you 1t i'm. but
mus says I nivver seed rabbit wuss
scared. Ye're vastly improved sim last
year, sir"
The clergyman smiled proudly.
An If We keeps on improvin' and
comes agin next year, why"-with a
shake Of his head-"summat'l happen to
that rabbit London Tit-Bits.
The vicar of mining village sent A
pair of boots to the cobbers for repairs:
but Bill who had been imbibing rather
freely, felt no inclinat ation for work, 50
the boots were not touched that day.
Next morning his nerves were rather
shaky, and he longed for "a hair of the
dog that bit him"
His own boots were rather dirty, so
he thought there was no harm in put.
ting on the parsons, which he. accord.
ingly did, and started off for the vil-
lage pub to get ''reviver" He had
not gone very far when whom did he
meet but the vicar, who said:
sent ,,,y hnot. do,,a ,.~..-
Williams Are they not finished YETI"
Why, mister" answered Bill calmly,
they're not mended yet, but they're on
the road"
As she stood outside the little country
inn two great tears shone in her inno-
cent eyes. tears SO large that the passing
cyclist saw them. Beauty in distress
caused him to dismount and ask If he
could be of any assistance
I'm afraid not, thank you" replied
the damsel, sorrowfuly, as she pointed
10 an automatic chocolate machine at
tached to the wall of the inn. I've just
put a penny in that thing and nothing
has come out"
That's soon remedied" said the
young man, confidently. ...@
He slipped coin into the slot. and
then another. '", -.
After The sixth he muttered angrily..,
raised his cap, and pedaled wildly away
AS he disappeared female face
peeped round the door. r
ANY luck?" asked the owner thereof.
"Oh, yes, maj" replied the simple
damsel, gayly. That's the tenth I've