davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1918-01-25
Bviefs Of The Week

Lawrence LaLonde left Tuesday for
Detroit.
Mrs. Frank German is very low with
pneumonia.
Miss Carrie Porter is confined to her
home by illness.
Florence Ashley is confined to her
home by illness.
Mr.. and Mrs. Chas Brown left Mon
day for Muskegon.
John Porter left Tuesday on a bust
ness trip to Detroit.
YIN. E. Mapass left Tuesday on
b0sn4ess trip to Detroit.
Raymond Knight returned home
Monday from Bay City.
Howard, the little son OF Mr.. and
Mrs. Carl Whiteford, is i'll.
Mrs. A. J. West of Cheboygan is
~guest Of Mrs. Geo. Bowen.
II. H. Cummings returned Tuesday
from his business trip to Detroit.
Mrs. Earl Burt of Central Lake Wis
tied friends in the city first OF the week.
Elder r. ID. Davis of Boyne City was
guest at the Hector McKinnon home,
Tuesday.
Mrs. Henry Cummings entertained
party of friends at her home, Monday
evening.
Harry Walstad is home for a visit
with his parents, Mr.. and Mrs. A.
--Walstad.
Mrs. VIM. Cole OF Ellsworth Is visit
ing at the home of her mother, Mrs M.
Sedgeman.
Ed. Smatts is spending few weeks
with his daughter, Mrs. r. M. Burr, at
Central Lake.
Miss Una Burdck returned Tuesday
from two weeks visit with friends at
Harbor Springs.
Miss Beuah Holiday is here from
Traverse City guest of her mother,
Mrs. j. q. Holiday, and other relatives.
Mr.. and Mrs. Gus Jensen left last
Saturday for their home at Chicago,
after weeks visit here at the home OF
Mr.. and Mrs. Harry Simmons
Mrs. Frank Zouek has invited the
MEGA Mica Club to spend the evening
at her home this Friday, JAM 25th All
r'shing tn DeTotify your president.
l. ~
~ ~ Manager, VIM. H. Sloan
nd na wye last Saturday from
sueet for that city again on
MCHlG.,css .esday noon. He ex-
poets to return Friday.
George and Lyle Jepson left Tuesday
for Grand Rapids where they applied
for enlistment in the Navy. They were
rejected for physical disability and re.
turned home latter part of the week
Regular meeting OF Masonic Lodge,
No. 379 F. & A. M. this Saturday eve-
ming. Owing to shortage of Electric
Light service, meeting will commence
at 700 p. m. Possibly work in third
degree.
George Hamilton was taken quite i'll
last Saturday with severe cold Kid
ney trouble developed and he has been
quite sick. DR.. Armstrong of Charlie.
voix was called in consultation on the
case, Tuesday.
Mrs. Matilda Smith passed away last
Sunday evening at the home of her
brother, Geo. Matthews on Bowen S
Addition. Deceased was 68 years of
age. The remains were taken to Rapid
City Tuesday. Funeral services and
interment were held at that place,
Thursday.
Ira Bartlett, who has been suffering
from badly infected right hand for
some time, was up to the Reycraft hos
pital, at Petoskey, latter part of last
where he had the finger next to
the little one removed. He returned
ome first Of this week and the hand is
how improving nicely.
~ GEE
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1918-01-25

Perhaps the best hand . man car
hold in the game of life 10 the hanl
Of some good woman.
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1918-01-25

A woman's mind IL nearly always
en- dress-which may explain the fre
Quent changes OF both.
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1918-01-25

The church with the hishest stespls
isn't always the nearest heaven.
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1918-01-25

Alas for the intellect when the IN
Outstanding Is limited only by the size
of the feet!
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1918-01-25

The man who hands out free advice
10 others always goes elsewhere for
bis own.
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1918-01-25

The woman who makes fun OF z
new style one day is usually trying. "a
initiate II the next.
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1918-01-25

Many man doesn't realize what he
70 up to until he Is called down.
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1918-01-25

The mind cure may be al right
but the patient must have . mind o.
his own to start with.
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1918-01-25

A woman 10 always suspicious Of
another woman who dresses better
than herself.
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1918-01-25

The stronger the butter In the tve
the weaker It n In the market.
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1918-01-25

You may have a way Of your own.
but you will not always have your
own way.
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1918-01-25


those . year ago, lumber camps are
having dinculty In keeping msa.
some camps sfs installing moviAs
pictursa.
WAYsiDe WISDOM
Married in haste, repent In . garrsA
The proof OF the parlor u the kitohp
On.
Feed Q man. flattsr . man. feol .
man.
Wild oats make a mighty poor brsa,E.
last food.
Poor relatives should b seen aaa
not heard.
Sometimes good fellowship To- enly
skin deep.
There 10 no use for fat man 70 txy
TO Be . genius.
Tell me what you buy and wfll ten
you what you are.
Silence IL golden no doubt but -
book agent thinks 90.
The value OF q dollar depends q
who borrows II from you.
We all talk too much-bscause
there 10 so much to tSt1 tts1k,.p
Some men try to get ahead In THE
world by holding others back.
The optimist enjoys the fruit ana
the pessimist slips on the peal.
A pink tea soul and q church sair
mind-what affinities are thsseY
II would be al right IL the man who
doesn't mean anything wouldn't cay n.
Reason II the faculty which enables
~ 70 justify the conclusions Of PERU
d1ce.
There are no dreams 90 sweet a
those which the alarm clock will poe
let NJ finish.
Might may not make right but Il n
the part OF prudence 70 have both M
on your side.
Everybody would b satisfied VIII
his lot u Il would - possible q pue
. Rertss&e a II
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1918-01-25

When q man says q bright thing he
nearly always forgets the quotation
Earks.
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1918-01-25

Honesty pays in the end-but you
must be at the right end.
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1918-01-25

Lots of men are lenient with them
selves because of their belief thai
charity begins at home.
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1918-01-25

Some people are willing to be good
II paid for 1t. and others are good for
nothing.
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1918-01-25

II you want anything done wen, do
II yourself That is why most people
laugh at their own Jokes.
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1918-01-25

There IL danger that Q little learn
ing will result In q swelled head.
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1918-01-25

Hot air 10 the motive power that
operates the human talking machine.
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1918-01-25

Women have never been able to find
. successful way of keeping secrets.
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1918-01-25

A miser II . great lover of ssner
csity In everybody except himself.
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1918-01-25

dsemins feature. at least he never
sUNFLoWGR PHILOSOPHY
When q man Is crazy about one
thing, he II usually off about every.
thing else.
A good rabbit dog and . good pool
player may be added to our list Of In
teresting paradoxes.
II IL . good old fashioned rule. In
listening to gossip. that any one who
will bring, will carry.
People don't regard any sickness -
serious that doesn't cause them 70
take off their clothes.
Probably . widower enjoys q second
wife as much az Q widow enjoys her
husbands life insurance.
A small man always has one weapon
he can use against . great big man;
he can talk, about him.
Some poor people have nerve that
would make them rich r. directed at
dollars instead of doughnuts.
II 10 q great deal more satisfactory
and respectable to bury o husband
than to get a divorce from one
We are glad we are not pretty
gaan: . pretty man IL unhappy except
when o woman 10 admirlns him
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1918-01-25

An opportunity 10 frequently run to
earth by a hustler while . lazy man
is sitting on the fence waiting for Il
10 come along.
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1918-01-25

Some men will even 30 to church on
Sunday rather than stay 1t home.
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1918-01-25

A man may be able to deceive his
own wife. but not his fathers wife.
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1918-01-25

Doing as one pleasss soon ceases %
be fascinating II no one objects.
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1918-01-25

Polish Is not necessary to enable Q
man to shine In society-if he has
the coin.
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1918-01-25

1t 10 . wonder that some Of Cupid's
Victims haven't turned and put htn
out of the running long ago.
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1918-01-25

Beauty is said % be only skin deep.
but many a woman's beauty depends
upon the size of her balance in the
bank.
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1918-01-25

Money also helps the man who tries
- help himself.
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1918-01-25
ODD

OO6
That we should speak OF wadinE
through q dry brook.
That one can make ones maiden
proposal to q widow.
That. a fellow can be in girls pres
erce and yet be gone.
That the more we think Of some
people the less we think Of them.
That we often speak Of folks being
.. odds when they are really trying to
get even.
That the more people we get u
| clip us keep q secret, the sooner II
gets away from Us.
That saying a man Is capable Of
anything" is a very different thig from
recommending him as thoroughly cap.
able.
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1918-01-25

There are more ways o: dassrlfns
punishment than there are Of sscsp-
,ns IL r..
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1918-01-25

Fearing to break into profession
that's overcrowded, some men waste
the best years of their lives looking
for one that isn't.
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1918-01-25

The highest price ever paid for
single flower was given for tulip in
Amsterdam by an enthusiast who
paid $250,000 for II.
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1918-01-25

Keep your hand on your pocketbook
whom q man begins to pat you on the
back.
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1918-01-25
CHOW PICTURES TO KEEP MEN

Ashland. Wis With wages doubls
those . year ago, lumber camps are
having difnculty In keeping msA.
some camps de installing movins
ndcturoa.
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1918-01-25

The chronic borrower has one re-
dseming feature. at least he never
Charlevoix county herald. (East Jordan, Mich.) 189?-1953, 1918-01-25

II you want anything done wen, do
1t yourself That is why most people
laugh at their own Jokes.
Perhaps the best hand . man CAP
hold in the game of life 10 the hanl
Of some good woman.
A woman's mind IL nearly always
en- dress--which may explain the fre
Quent changes OF both.
Alas for the intellect when the IN
Outstanding Is limited only by the size
u the feet!
You may have a way OF your own.
but you will not always have your
own way.
Some people are willing to be good
II paid for It. and others are good for
nothing.
Polish Is not necessary to enable Q
man to shine in society-if he has
the coin.
Hot air IL the motive power that
operates the human talking machine.
Women have never been able to ind
. successful way of keeping secrets.
A man may be able to deceive his
own wife. but not his fathers wife.
A miser II . great lover of gsner
csity In everybody except himself.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1918-10-17
ACROSS OCEAN IN AIRpLANE
Expert ls Of Opinion That Successful
Flight Will Be Made Before
End Of Year.

The most famous voyage in the his.
tory of the world was made In 1892.
Columbus sailed from Spain, touched
the Portuguese coast, paused at the
Azores, and then drove across the. I'M
charted seas until his jollyboats nosed
the sands of new world.
Another voyage that will shine. IN
history beside that of Columbus will
almost surely reverse the route of the
great discoverer-from the American
continent at Newfoundland, say, to
the Azores. thence to Portugal and
finally to France. But it will be made
through the skies by airplane. And II
there is anything in prophecy based on
science it will be made this year.
AT least this is the settled opinion
of Maj. Gen. William s. Brancker, con.
troller general of equipment on the
Isritish air council. General Brancker
is now in Washington to help co.ordi.
nate the effort of the allies in the air.
His position as to the flight across the
Atlantic is simply this: Tint 1t must
be done some time in the present war,
that 1T is already possible to do 1t, and
that therefore 1t should be done now,
Once the first flight is an accomplish.
ed fact he sees steadily growing fleets
of huge planes making the trip as q
regular part of the independent aerial
offenslve.-lrom Committee on Public
Information.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1918-10-17
One Day TOO Late

i The average Oklahoma Indian Is
more Interested in oil royalties than
In current events. Recently locally
well-known Indian came into Ardmore
to cash his quarterly check. and on
being approached for Red Cross con.
tribution, asked:
"What for, Red Cross?'
Red Cross work was briefly ex.
planned, and the Indian came back
with another query, What WARP"
"Why, the war with the Germans,'
was the answer. i'Didn't YOU know
America is at war with the Germans? p
"No," replied the Indian. "How
long?"
The situation was explained al
length, and after studying over the
matter, the Indian said:
"Too bad! Know UNI yesterday
could help heap. Two Germans by
my place, hauling well-rig. Could xii
'em easy.'-Everybody's Magazine.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1918-10-17
DEEMS POINTS OUT
/, DANGER FROM FIRE
UNITED STATES FOOD ADMINS.
TRAITOR URGES FARMERS TO
(, PROTECT GRAIN FIELDS
|, ALONG RAILROAD LINES.

United States Food Administrator J.
#. Deems of Iowa is concerned about
the danger of losses of grain by fire
and has issued q statement urging
farmers. railroad managers and every
body to cooperate in avoiding this
menace.
Travel through the state discloses
that much grain is stacked and shock
ed near railroad lines. and hay is
stacked adjacent to rights of way Rail
road rights Of way, for the most part,
are covered with rank growths Of
weeds.
All Of this material will burn rapid
ly. Indeed, cut.over fields will burn
as readily as grain and hay which
have stood for day or two after be-
ing cut.
Sparks from locomotives will carry,
with the wind, sometimes $50 or 300
feet.
This combination of circumstances
makes the danger from fire very
great peril.
But 1t is easy to guard against it.
II farmers will stack as far from rail
rond rights of way as possible and will
pillow guards 70 to 125 feet within their
fences along railroad rights of way,
burning the strip from the burrows to
the railroad, the danger will be large
ly eliminated.
Administrator Deems urges that at
tsntion be given y, this vital matter
10 Iowa at once.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1918-10-17
MADE THE CHAIN COMPLETE
Physician In His Excitement Rather
Gave Away Secret He Should
Have Kept.

Attorney General Gregory tells this
piquant story Of prominent finan-
cier and well-known physician:
The money juggler called at the Of
Gee of his family physician one morn
Ing and told him with much concern
that his only son was suffering from
diphtheria. The doctor was SOLICITORS
but assured the financier that with the
care given in the hospital to which
the boy had been taken he would pull
through nicely. "Of course" said the
medico, 'no one is safe when that
terrible disease is around"
But" said the father, f'the boy con-
tossed to me that he is sure he caught
the disease from the parlor maid
whom he had kissed"
swell, young people are certainly
very thoughtless," mused the doctor,
.I'm sorry to hear that your son has
been so indisc-eet."
"Yes, Of course, DOCTOR" said the
financier, nervously, "but don't you
see, to be frank with you'll have
6lssSu tHe girl. 10 you tnlnk 1, 100,
will have the disease?"
"Why, yes" said the doctor. "You
are probably already infected. In
fact, that would be the very next thing
to expect"
"oh. that's awful" gasped the finan-
cier, sand I kiss my own dear wife
every morning and evening, SO she,
too
"Good heavensl" cried )thee ply
stefan, Jumping up excitedly, "then /,
too, will have it!"-Illustrhted Sunday
Magazine.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1918-10-17
NOT MARK OF DIsREsPEcT
Omission of "Mr." Before Name Of
President Is Thoroughly Sane
toned by Good Usage.

A Kansas City teacher asks the
Star whether it is really in good taste
to refer to the president in head
line or elsewhere as "Wilson." Ought
it not always be "Mr. Wilson, or
president Wilson," she asks. 1t has
Jared on her in reading the news
to pupils to find the presidents name
used without handle.
Hard and fast rules in matters of
good taste are difficult to establish. In
general the title is appropriately used
with the presidents name: in general,
but not always. The omission OF the
title is not dfsrespectful on the CON
trary, the more distinguished the man,
the more the omission OF the title is
sanctioned by good usage. We speak
of Webster, Calhoun, Lincoln. Glad
stone habitually without the "Mr."
So with living men. Isn't it more often
edison" than "NIr. Edison.' Berg
SON. than IN. Bergson," "Kipling" than
| "Mr. Kipling," 'Lloyd George" than
"Mr. Lloyd George" ''Poincare" than
IN. Poincare," "Kerensky" than "NIr,
Kerensky?"
When reference is made to we'll
known man by his name without IT,
tie or even initials there is an implied
compliment. The implication is that
there is only one Lloyd George only
one Clemenceau, only one Wilson,
Whether the title is used or not de-
ponds largely on what seems to be the
requirements Of the observation-disclosures
City Times.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1918-10-17
Historic siqnals.

Our books on naval history which give
In terms of flags, Nelson's signal at Ira.
falgar, will have to be brought up to
date to include in Morse dots and
dashes, the immortal "St. George for
England" of Zeebrugge. Our japanese
allies will be the first to note the fine
Watchword for Togo, an intense ad.
mirer of Nelson, employed a variant
OF the Trafalgar signal in the great
sea battle with Russia. Said he in his
reporE II ran up this signal for all
the ships in sight: The fate of the
empire depends upon this event; every
man is expected to do his utmost -
London Chronicle.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1918-10-17
Allies Have more whsat.

England and France have made q
remarkable wartime record In raising
crops this year. The French crop Of
wheat promises to be 10000, 600 bush.
els more than last year. and England
probably will have 100000 more
than In 1917.
With 100000 fewer male laborers on
the land than before the war, England
and Wales have planted SO per cent
more KIND to crops this year than In
1915, and the area Of grain is the
largest on record. The Increase in
grain and potatoes is 100000 acres,
Scotland and Ireland are expected to
show almost as great an increase. The
wheat acreage in England and Wales
is 2,665O00 acres; oats, 2,s2O, 900
acres; barley, 10000 acres; rye and
minor grains, $4,000 acres; potatoes,
645,OOO acres.
The entire wheat area Of the United
Kingdom this year as estimated by
Broomhall is 100000 acres, on which
the crop may exceed 1OO,OOO,OOO
bushels.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1918-10-17
Fate's PIavfuInes..

A lean young infantryman, hurried
across France with his regiment, was
flung into fight near Chateau Thierrv
with scanty sleep and short rations.
went over crest with the first wave
of assault, emerged from a mix-up
with German bayonet none the worse
except for a tear in the seat Of his
breeches, escaped by miracle every
blast in the murderous crossflre Of
German machine guns and finally came
out one of the few unscratched ones In
his platoon He dropped on the ground.
doubly thankful for the promise of a
few moments rest. but he bounded IN
again in the agony of his first wound.
His face had landed in bunch Of
nettles.-Stars and Stripes.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1918-10-17
Wrist Score pad..

A convenieht little score pad for the
softer is attached to q leather strap,
which may be fastened around the
wrist.
The score pad II worn, Of course, on
the left wrist and the golfer may jot
down memoranda Of his score as easily
as social meIh0s are scrawled on
starched cuffsor used to be when
starched cuffs were In fashion.
The usefulness of the wrist has been
sadly neglected In other years, when
the bracelet and occasionally the fan
were the only things 1t was expected to
carry. Wrist watches and golf scores
now fall to Its share as part Of the
burden Of life'a impediments, and very
efficiently 1t meets Its new obligations.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1918-10-17
New lnxention

A recent invention which has mot
been marketed as yet, but is reported
to be a great success, is an electric
roller for use in making the much.
needed five-yard rolls Of bandaRes.
The new device is not only a great
time and labor saver, but requires lit
tile practice to learn to operate. Tho
rollers operated by hand, as they have
been heretofore, require skill and
training to operate them successfully,
and the work is strenuous. BY rolling
electrically the operator is able to
Keep both hands on the bandage, while
In hand operation one hand guides the
roll or bnndage' and the other eper-
ates the roller.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1918-10-17
The Dream and the su,iness.

1.-THE Germans thought war was ro-
mantle and glorious" said Brand
Whitlock IN q Toledo address. They're
finding 1t very sordid and disappoint-
ing business.
1.-THE Germans are in the position of
the young lady who was asked If her
seaside love affair bad been very ro-
mantle.
'R0mantie?' she replied. NO. Real
istic, rather. Hubert and / each
thought the other was an immensely
rich swell, and 1t turns out that he
collects the monthly installments on
eur near-silk parlor curtains"