davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1918-08-02

get home these nights that they can't
do much practlcing.
Isn't It wonderful how you like to
listen TO a good looking woman talk II
YOU are not married 70 her?
The trouble with the big g-mouthed
guy who says what he thinks is that
he never thinks.
The Bride who is proudly sweeping
up the aisle doesn't realize that in
about wear she will be humbly scrub
bing down the woodwork,
Nothing makes a man so mad as to
ask his wife for half cup of coffee
and have her fill the cup to the brim
A wife may fuss a good dral and may
keep you from doing lot of things
that you want to do. But when YOU
get sick she takes mighty good care
Of YOU
No man ever impressed us with his
love OF cleanliness by carrying a tooth
brush in his vest pocket
And Eve wasn't the last woman to
let snake talk her out OF a happy
home.
BE sure you are right-and then talk
1t over with your wife and do as she !
tells you to do
Behold the Married Man. He ram
bleth home at midnight filled with Re
morse, Affection, Tamarack and Good |
Intentions He entereth his household .
and stumbleth over a chair placed in
MS path by his wife with Malice Aiore-
thought And his Affection and Good |
Intentions vanish even as a SNOWFALL |
in the Kaisers' future home
A pretty girl hasn't much to worry |
about Any man will accept her at her
face value
In eight cases out Of ten the woman
who is always wailng that her hus-
band will have a Stepmother for the
children when she dies manages to
stick on the job and has a Stepfathcr
for the children when her husband
dies.
Many a man who baS callouscs all |
over his conscience hnsn.t any on his /.
hands.
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1918-08-02

Anxious The fact that you saw pink
elephants in your bedroom last night
Should not cause you worry. But it
herd Of red. white and blue elephants
should call on YOU, you had better
either cut out the booze or see a spe-
CialS.
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1918-08-02
Betcha
SAID sad Mr. Rore

SAID sad Mr. Bore,
As he brushed or his clothes.
"A rap ON the door
ls worth two on the nose
Luke McLuke
Said pro German crank
A. he caught himself rreling.
"A bat on the nose
Follows bats In the ceiling"
North Georgia Citizen.
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1918-08-02
COUNTY GUARD GUESTS
AT STATE GUARD CAMP

The Oklahoma county guard Of 100
men Of which NJ C. Binon is captain,
will be guests OF Company II and Com
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1918-08-02

guard it is expected will be accepted
by the war department within the next
ten days Following their official
recognition in all probability they will
receive orders for a fifteen day en-
rampment for manenYcrs
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1918-08-02
GUARD LIBERALIZATION
IS EXPECTED SOON

Twenty-four line, six staff and one
medical company comprising the Sec
ond and Third Oklahoma national
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1918-08-02

Willic-Paw. what is a pitched bat
,Ic'
Paw-A fifteen inning baseball game
without run, my son.
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1918-08-02

A hypocrite tx Dealer Dare.
He. boarding worldly treasures.
ilr ls % mHu who's long on prayer
And short uu weights and measures
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1918-08-02
Rouse Nit DEM

ybgkQi etaoin shrdlu cmfwyp xzfflN
Cincinnati Enquirer.
Eiaoin Shrdlu and Cmiwyp are all
good American names But how did
them two Huns, NbglqJ and Xztiti, get
into the lineup
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1918-08-02
Per'fly Correct.

Since Major General Hell. formerly
Won MackcnScn's chief OF staff has been
leading the retreat Of the Hun forces
we suppose It is all right TO say that
the Americans are fighting to beat
He'll
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1918-08-02
Helm

We wrote this little rhyme FOR fun
Some day, friend, you will learn,
That, while the water hHs to run,
The fire has time 10 burn.
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1918-08-02
Luke McLuke Saws

This Work or Fight order is a good
hing The amateur ukulele and saxa-
phone players are so tired when they
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1918-08-02
WHERE THEY PLAY TO-DAY.

National League.
81 Louis at Philadelphia.
Pittsburgh at Boston.
Cincinnati at Brooklyn
Chicago NJ New York
American League
Washington at Detroit
Philadelphia at Chicago
New York at st Louis.
RustOn at Cleveland.
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1918-08-02

pany | at their meckly encampmcnt held
on the state fair grounds Saturday and
Sunday.
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1918-08-02
Then II Happened.

Then 1t Happened.
Il wonder il YOU could" unused the
Rummy as he stirred his highball
you wonder if you could WHAT de-
mandcd the Barkeep.
81 wonder if you could say that an
electrician would make a good Circuit
Judge replied the Rummy as he head
ed for the door.
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1918-08-02
Clara KimbaIl Young

= The greatest of all screen
= artists now appearing exclusively
at the Strand theater in her --latest
and best photoplay. The star of
"Magda" stands in a class all by
herself. not only on account of her
fascinating beauty. but her classic
noise and perfect form and charm
ing personality; a face which is
Of striking beauty. The story OF
"Magda' is a gripping drama OF
rare pathos and power and points
a moral 10 fathers and mothers
who arbitrarily attempt TO rule
the lives Of their children. The
iAct tla1 Clara KimbaiI Young is
- . favorite with our readers
11N M the Strand at every
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1918-08-02

The Point of View.
An awful Joke I'm telling you.
You won't drop dead / hope.
But speaking Of the point Of view.
There IN the pcriscOpe
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1918-08-02
LukeMLn1ke
His Column
Mercy!
)D(NN,N /QN9

The glazicr is a drunken ass,
he Is rummy sluh,
They say he has to have his glass
Before he'll do u job.
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1918-08-02
Bliss.

Did she marry happily" asked the
First Woman
Il should say So" replied the Second
Woman "Why, her alimony amounts
to 500 a month"
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1918-08-02
Scoreboard
YESTERDAYS RESULTS.

National League
At Philadelphia e. 81 Louis Oirst
imol,
At Philadelphia /, St Louis . (sccond
gnmeD.
At Brooklyn 4; Cincinnati 0
At New York o. Chicago 3.
At Boston 0. Pittsburgh
American League.
Al Chicago 2. Washington /.
AZ Detroit 0, New York 7
AZ Cleveland 0: Philadelphia T.
At St Louis / Boston ..
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1918-08-02
the Yoke"

The battle for love OF a woman with
no regrets, against a vivio back
ground of stirring action in the
Philippines A new Theda Bara
super 6-reel PRODUCTION.
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1918-02-12
Alta News Notes.
Special to Times-Republican.

special to Tlmes-Republican.
Alta, Feb. 12.-All Of the churches in
Alta are closed and services are held
in the school house. where fires are
maintained. This practice will continue
until spring when no fires are required,
or until the fuel situation becomes re-
lieved
Mrs. Sophia Gulbranson and Victo,
Adolphson. two pioneers of this COM
munty. died last week and were buried
in the Alta cemetery. Both had Deen
residents of this place for more than
forty years and both leave large fam
lilies.
The young business men Of Alta have
formed a home guard company, and
nightly four of them assist the regular
night Waterman in patroling the town
to guard against fires. The elevators
are given especial attention.
Mrs. Chris Reese. of this place. has
three sons in the United States service.
all in the navy. but not content with
this offering to her adopted country
she is a steadfast worker for the Red
Cross. and to date has knitted IS
sweaters. pairs Of socks. helmets,
4 pair Of wristlets scarfs and pair
OF mittens and gloves. Mrs. Reese Is
81 years Of age. a native of Denmark
and a resident of this country for moro
than twenty wears,
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1918-02-12
HEAVY MEAT EATERS
HAVE SLOW KIDNEYS
Eat Less Meat il You Feel Baekaehy
or Have Bladder Trouble-Take
Glass Of Salts.

No man or woman who eats meat
jgularly can make mistake By flush
hg the kidneys occasionally, says a
we'll known authority. Meat forms uric
acid which clogs the kidney pores so
/ they sluggishly filter or strain only
1 part of the waste and poisons from
the blood. then you get sick. Nearly all
rheumatism, headaches, liver trouble,
nervousness, constipation. dizziness,
eleeplessness. bladder disorders come
from sluggish kidneys.
The moment you feel a dull ache
in the kidneys or your back hurts, or
II the urinesi is cloudy, offensive. full OF
sediment, irregular of passage or at
tended by sensation Of scaldins, get
about four ounces of Jad Salts from
any reliable pharmacy and take a
tablespoonful. in glass Of water be-
fore breakfast for few days and your
kidneys will then act fine. This
famous salts Is made from the acid OF
grapes and lemon juice, combined with
litllia, and has been used for genera
tons to flush clogged kidneys and
stimulate them to activity, also to neu-
tralize the acids in urine so it no long
er causes irritation. thus ending
bladder disorders.
Jad Salts is inexpensive and can
not inture; makes a delightful effer-
vescent lithia water drink which all
regular meat eaters should take now
and then to keep the kidneys clean
and the blood pure, thereby avoiding
serious kidney complications.
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1918-02-12
Northwood News.

Special to Times Republican.
Northwood, Feb. 1.-THE Worth
County Farm Bureau is now assured
the required number having signed up
and the organization will be perfected
on Thursday, Feb. IA.
Mrs. S. A. Pangburn, wife Of DR.
Pangburn, died at her home in the city
Monday, Feb. 3. and was buried at
Sunset Rest cemetery, services and in
termcnt being conducted by Rev. H. r.
Williams, of the Baptist church. She
leaves her husband and two children
her aged parents Mr.. and Mrs. X. II
Douglass, of this city, and two brothers
who live in Wisconsin.
Hans Peterson, Northwoods veteran
mail carrier, died at his home Thurs
day from a complication Of diseases.
Funeral services were held at the Luz
theran church.
Miss Leav Krogness, OF Northwood.
and Grin c.. Tenold, of Kensett, were
married Sunday evening in Northwood,
at the home of Rev. Mr.. Fosness. The
young folks left for wedding trip TO
various points in Wisconsin. after
which the bride will make her home
with her husbands mother, he having
been called to the colors.
Walter Johnson, Of the Northwood
Mercantile Company, severely injured
his leg Monday while breaking kind
ling. and will be unable to work for
some time.
X. l.. Moen is back from Iowa City
where he has been for some time re-
cuperating from the effects of an oper-
alton for appendicitis.
Link Perry returned Friday from
Camp Pike. Ark. where he visited with
his two sons, Burt and Floyd. Floyd
has been i'll with pneumonia, but is
improving gradually and receiving good
care.
A. X. Trustem, deputy sheriff, went
to Minneapolis Sunday, and took Al
bert 1ngebretson. who has been at a
private sanatorium there for mental
trouble, to Cherokee, where the unfor-
tunate young man was turned over to
the state authorities for treatment.
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1918-02-12
OUT OF TWENTY CASES OF Al
LEGGED PLOTTING ONLY TWO
ARE FOUND TO De JUSTIFIED.
PEOPLE UNDULY SCARED
BY FALSE REPORTS
No Glass or Poison Found in Tomatoes,
Candy and Other Samples Of Food
stuffs Submitted to State Dairy De-
partment-Sand Found in Tomatoes
Talk Causes Suspicion.
oecial to Times Republican.

Special to Times Republican.
Des Moines, Feb. 12.-Out of some
twenty samples Of foodstuffs submit
ted to the state food and dairy COM
mission which were believed to have
glass or poison in them two samples
were found to contain glass. One Of
these was from a small town in east
ern Iowa and the other from west
ern Iowa town. In both instances the
pieces OF glass were rather coarse and
easily discernible.
In one instance the glass was dis
covered in sack Of flour and the 9TH
err it was in corn meal. The evidence
thus far secured in these cases would
indicate that personal enemies OF the
persons in whose -four and corn meal
the glass was found were responsible
rather than alien enemies. altho the
complete evidence in the cases has not
been secured.
Samples Of tomatoes, candy and
various other foodstuffs have been
submitted to the dairy department but
no glaas or poison has been discovered.
In peanut candy submitted some small
pieces of wood were found which evil
IDENTIFY were included with the peanuts
when the candy was made. No for
eign substance was found in the to-
matoes.
Tomatoes thought to contain glass
were submitted to the city chemist at
Des Moines recently. Upon analysis
sand but no glass was found in the
tomatoes.
People are very apt to think food
stuffs have been poisoned or filled with
ground glass nowadays when there
has been so much talk about these
things" said Dairy Commissioner w.
B. Barney in commenting on the large
number of samples which had been
forwarded to the state food and dairy
office for examination.
of course it always pays to be care
full and we can't be overcautious but
the evidence so far does not show any
widespread attempt to poison or injure
foodstuffs."
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1918-02-12
HUBBARD LEADS IN STAMP SALE
Banner Town in Hardin County, Elk.
eeeding Allotment so Per Cent.

Banner Town in Hardin County, Elk.
eeedins Allotment so Per Cent.
Special to Times Republican.
Iowa Falls, Feb. 12.-In this county
Hubbard leads the way in the cam
paign for war saving stamps and has
over subscribed its allotment SO per
cent. This Is record of which the
people Of that part Of the county have
reason to be proud. New Providence
has also gone over the top in this cam
paign and has already over-subscribed
the apportionment made for that local
ity. The campaign in this county is in
charge Of s. J. Osgood, cashier Of the
Peoples Trust & Savings Bank, and
the above reports received by him
last evening are most gratifying. The
city campaign is in charge of E. E.
Benedict cashier Of the State National
Bank, and an organization for the can
vass Of the city Is now completed. The
first report made is by the committee
named to solicit subscriptions from
$500 to $1,000 and from this canvass,
about $4,000 was raised. Tho apport-
ionment for the city - $4,000. Tho
schcc!. are carving on an active cam
paign for w. 8. s. under the direction
Of Attorney Gerald Lerning. Tho can
vas Of tho city for smaller amounts
will be made during the closing Ays Of
the month and those In charge Of the
campaign have no doubt that the allot-
ment for the city will be met and over
subscribed as have the other appor-
tionments for liberty bonds, etc.
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1918-02-12
Montour Items.

Special to Times Republican
Montour. Feb. ia boy was born
to Mr.. and Mrs. ]. NJ. Bridges last Fri
day.
Mrs. Rhody Dwiggins and Mrs. Stella
Kent returned to their home at Green
field after a short visit with their
mother, Mrs. Clarrisa Paxton.
Mrs. Vance Webb and two children,
who have been visiting Mrs. Webbs
father, Goodwin Goodvinson, at Os-
trander, Mimi, returned last week.
Mrs. George Doran and two daugh-
tiers Of Belle PLANE, visited the formers
parents, Mr.. and Mrs. r. IL. McMlchael.
Mr.. and Mrs. Ed Hepfer and children
Of Gladstone, visited at the home Of
T. o. Gibson Sunday.
Floyd Ellis sold his meat market to
Carl Avery and gave possession Mon
day. Mr.. Ellis has not yet determined
what he will do.
Mrs. Frank SturtZ went to Cedar
Rapids last week to visit her mother
for few days and attend the wedding
OF her brother. Harry Milligan.
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1918-02-12
Return to Old Customs.

Special to Times Republican.
Cedar Rapids, Feb. 12.-Coe College
seniors will appear at the chapel exer-
cises in caps und gowns in the future,
according to II decision reached by the
TENDERS Of the class recently. The
wearing Of the academic costume by
the members Of the senior class has
always been a custom Of the college in
the past. but as the war has worked
havoc with some Of the college tradi-
I :ans it was not so closely adhered to
as In past years. But on supectal &C.
casions the cap and gown will be worn,
with the faculty Of the college as we'll
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1918-02-12
STOP CATARRH! OPEN
I M0S7RlLS AND HEAD
Says Cream Applied In Nostrils
Relieves Head. Colds 1t Once.


q IL your nostrils are clogged and your
Pad b stuffed and you can't breathe
eely because of a cold or catarrh, just
y small bottle Of Ely's Cream Balm
any drug store. Apply a little Of
Us fragrant, antiseptic cream into
5ur nostrils and let 1t penetrate thru
iery air passage Of your head, sooth-
b and healing the infiamed, swollen
}ucous membrane and you get instant
slief.
4 All! how good it feels. Your nos
lis are open, your head is clear, no
pre- hawking, snuffling, blowing: no
pre- headache, dryness or struggling
m breath. Elyis Cream Balm is just
that sufferers from head colds and
htarrh need. It's delight.
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1918-02-12
ORGANIZE FARM BUREAU.

Farmers Of o'Brisn County Take Step,
70 Secure County Agent.
Special 10 Times Republican.
Sutherland, Feb. IA county farm
bureau has just been organized for this
county. The following officers have
been elected for one year: Eugene
Sullivan, Primghar. president; Verne
Brady, Sanborn, vice president: w. =
Armstrong. Primshar. secretary: W. a.
Warwick. Hartley, treasurer. Also a d.
rector was elected from each township
for the period Of one year. Guy G,
Youde, Sutherland, was elected to re-
present Waterman township.
A committee Of three was appointed
to find q suitable man for this county
While some Of the cost may come out
OF the county direct, the balance. or up
to $500. will be paid ~ the Uovsssa-
naent The county agent Will useE with
the officers Of the association onos
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1918-02-12

Waterloo.
Twenty dealers in cigarets in thi
CITY we're hailed before the polio
Justice Of this city Thursday on tn
charge Of selling cigarets to minor
under Is years. Miss Grace Ames. tn
truant officer, brought the charge
Most of the dealers pleaded guilty an
fined from IS to $12. Others asked TO
more time. in which to plead.
Clinton.
Two Clinton nurses have heard tn
call Of the Red Cross flag and ar
ready to go. Both are graduates o
Agatha hospitalMiss Hazel Stephen
son has been assigned cantonmen
service, and has been called to g
into the service Feb. Is. Her home /
at Rock Falls. Miss Dora Miller, VIII
has enlisted, will be called March Ii
according to her latest information.
Clinton.
| Marching beside the slowly movins
auto hearse, $50 boy scouts of Ameri
ca Saturday paid tribute to Clinton
first soldier to die in the service; Ser
geant John Deane Stuart, an infantry
man, who died at Camp Cody, Deming
N. NJ. All flags were at half-mast il
the city and remained so by procla
nation issued by Mayor H. c. Hanser
until after the funeral services in thu
First Presbyterian church Sunday ar
ternoon. Stuart was prominent II
state high school activities and alst
played with a number of professional
baseball league teams. at one time be.
ing q Cincinnati National league clut
recruit.
Cedar Falls.
Cedar Falls is up against another
shortage. This time it is sugar. Sat
urday morning our merchants were OBJ.
liged to limit all sales to 10 and q
cents. This Is the result Of an edic,
given out by wholesale houses Of Wa.
terloo in which the information Is given
that for the next thirty days they will
not have a pound Of sugar to Offer
the trade, so that it behooves the Local
dealers to restrict sales in order that
their limited supply may go as far al
possible. Therefore, in all probability
by the time the coal situation eases
up you will be confronted by sugar
famine. hnt at that it will not be as
bad az fuel shortage because 50 many
will tell you that using sugar Is all q
habit. But most Of US seem to like It.
North MeGrssor.
A wedding that has been kept q
secret until now Is given out in the fol-
lowing announcement: Married.: Aug
rs, 1917, in Paymton, Sask., Canada
Miss Winifred Canada to Mr.. Guy
Towers The bride is the second daugh-
ter Of MI. and Mrs. James Canada, OF
Elkader and one Of Clayton countys
best young ladies. and teacher oi
marked ability. She taught in the Law.
Ter and Elma schools and at Elma spec.
ialized in drawing and penmanship
She resigned few weeks ago from
the Luana Consolidated school to joir
her husband on the Towers ranch, neal
Paymton, where they will 60 to house.
keeping. Mr.. Towers has expected to &c
to France, but was exempted and sent
for his bride. Mrs, Towers has host
of friends here, who extend congratu-
lations.
Dysrsviils.
The fine new concrete bridge over
the MAguoketa river here will be com
pleted by Nov. 1. This stipulation was
In the contract with the Staner- Herkes
aYm, which secured the contract fol
1856. II The bridge when completed
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1918-02-12

cvening telling Of tho serious illneaa
OF his mother in Tennessee and hs
started for that place at oncc.
Miss Esther James went to Cam
bridge Friday afternoon 10 visit at the
Kenney home.
Henry Branson. on the Chase farm.
delivered forty-one l0-months- old
pigs TO the Thornton buyers Saturday
that brought him $1,S54S4. or s4524
per head.
Mrs. Samuel Konorc filed the Meth
odist pulpit Sunday morning and even
ing in the absence of her hunsband.
NJ, X Hunt. the local stock buyer.
bought and shipped out from this place
over $4,000 worth Of hogs last week.
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1918-02-12
Sioux Rapids News.

Special to Times Republican.
Sioux Rapids, Feb. l2.-Harley
Clauss came Friday from Camp Dodge
for a ten days visit with his wife and
parents.
Lester Marsh is home on q furlough
from the Great Lakes training station.
Fred Lowe underwent an operation
for appendicitis at the city hospital
Saturday.
The Red Cross auction sale and sup
per Saturday amounted TO nearly
$4,000.
Joyce Snyder is suffering from an
acute attack Of appendicitis.
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1918-02-12

there calculated 10 intvre the work. He
said false report had come back to
Iowa from Camp Funston to the effect
that Red Cross goods arrived at that
camp marked for drafted men only. He
said this was entirely erroneous and
thorough investigation rad just been
completed at Camp Funston proving
that no such marked goods had been
received there
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1918-02-12

Special to Times Republican.
Grinnell, Feb. 1.-THE Grinnell Col
lege string quartet, consisting of Mrs
C. N. Smiley, Professors D. E. Peck
and G. L. Pierce, of Grizcell. and Grace
Seary, of New Sharon, left for Camp
Dodge this morning, where they will
give a concert this afternoon and two
tomorrow. They are going at the in
vitaton Of the Army Y. NJ. c. A. The
girls glee club has been asked to sing
and will appear at the camp in . few
weeks.