Trench and camp. [volume] (Augusta, Ga.) 1917-1919, 1918-07-10
Our Weekly Fable In Slang
By BARTON RICHARDS

laws to suit himself. If instead Of
slipping a disciple Of Blackstone q few
weeks pay as a retainer when q man
had a grudge against his fellow flat
dweller he laid for his f. F. .. some
brunette p. M. and laid him out with
q few well directed shots Of Irish con-
feth, what I repeat would happen to
our future Supreme Judges. Possibly
the bricklayer shortage would he stop
ped or the plumbers would get q sup
ply Of good men, but that's neither here
nor there. No, no, in stenorian tones
/ stenore with q loud and reYerberant
stem against any changes against the
present penal code, except in few
cases which 1 believe have been over
looked.
My easus belu with the present sys-
TEN is that the penalties are not COM
mensurate with the crime. For in
stance il q rnan steals a kiss from
some coy damsei he gets fined G couple
Of years salary, but If he steals a nice
fresh railroad or steals the ice supply
from the poor IN the summer, he gets
honorable mention in the village blue
book. What's one or two kisses more
or less, when there are thousands Of
dams got EN- to peddle, with bear
market, while railroads or ice are some
thing else again.
AiEte are NlAiltS WIEN tHEt AiiG re-
version to type So eep across my soul
with a regular clyclonic sweep and
for the moment I feel myself reaching
for stone club such as my autedelivlan
ancestors packed on their hip. and
that urge has done some sweeping the
last two or three mornings
Up until a week ago, our erstwhile
peaceful neighborhood was as quiet as
the conference room at the Hague is
Just now, and the dickey birds sweet
carOilng in the morning sounded like
q boiler shop would sound In the East
end OF Pittsburgh which as you know
is the abode Of the elite. Up until
800 q. m. there was no other sound
than the strident tones Of somebody's
Big Ben announcing the coming Of
another morn, and the Milkman who
brought the milk at $50 a. m, Wore
rubber soled shoes to avoid disturbing
the wooing Of Morpheus as wooed by
our street
But no more. ais. do we have the
peaceful rest that rightfully belongs to
our urban community. ThS other morn
ing, or rather it was near the middle
q the night, being about 1870 a M
/ was pounding my ear peacefully when
the calm tranquility Of the summers
morn was rent broken and destroyed
by nerve destroying air splitting
racket that sounded Ike cross be-
tween Iuachine gun l3rlHg ana the
exhaust from a FORD AZ first
lhouBHt tnaL tne Germans NAG iahaen
at Battery Park and were double tim
ing up wan street and then as me
noise seemed stationary came to inc
conclusion That some one mad installed
pneumatic fiveter. down the street
l had an astute chanee q plifeFlng
any more nay tRat morning VITA tHat
row going on and eased INTO my y;
v DIS, with sigh in one breath and
a hymn OF nate IN tho next; Next
morning | thought that possibly the
noise wouldn't be heard but ] sure
had D bum steer Just as bum az II
had played the black TO- win ana
the red turned up for about 7:80 @. M,
the aforesaid peaceful tranquility re-
ceiyed another waIop IN its mldriit
that shook the foundations. First
whirrrtr. then a snort and then mil
lion rat tat tats with each tat sound
ing like hand grenade wiping out a
Hun.
This trip thinks /, III investigate
this cross between an earthquake ana
womans suffrage convention and with
a sock in one list and q CLUB IN the
other | hoped down the stairs and