davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Morris tribune., 1918-04-05
CFOKIO

Mabel Eddy is spending this week at
Hancock.
Miss Lenore Caldwell returned to
Carleton college after spending her va
cation at her home here.
Mrs. Sarah Leaman left Tuesday eve
ming for Winnipeg, Canada, where she
will spend the summer.
Mrs. Caldwell and aughter Lenore
were Norris callers Thursday of last
week.
Mr.. and Mrs. George Mowery of Barry
were Chokio callers Saturday.
Mrs. James Robinson spent Sunday
with her son Ed. at Dumont.
Mr.. and Mrs. Lee Eddy and children
Morris tribune., 1918-04-05

Little Falls Business College
where you get a little more and
little better than elsewhere" School
in session until August 1st. You can
enter at any time. It's the School for
You. adv. Sly
Morris tribune., 1918-04-05

We have wrecked REQ car and
will sell all parts cheap, including
engine, radiator, electric lamps, etc.
The Buick Agency, Morris, MINI. If.
Morris tribune., 1918-04-05

Stanley Britt, Joe Ka1ey, Luel1a Hensch,
Hattie Larson, Hoyt Caldwell, Agnes and
Olga Peterson, Janet and Ester Jacob
son, Florence Conroy and Alice Rich
muth.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1918-04-12
HEAVY MEAT EATERS
HAVE SLOW KIDNEYS
Eat less meat if you feel Back
achy or have Bladder
trouble.

No man or woman who eats meat
regularly can make mistake by
flushing the kidneys occasionally, says
a well-known authority. Meat forms
uric acid which excites the kidneys,
they become overworked from the
strain, get sluggish ana fail to filter
the waste and poisons from the blood,
then we get sick. Nearly all rheuma-
tism, headaches, liver trouble, nervous
ness, dizziness, sleeplessness and ur-
mary disorders come from sluggish
kidneys.
The moment you feel dull ache in
the urine is cloudy, offensive, full of
sediment, irregular Of passage or at
tended by a sensation Of scalding,
stop eating meat and get about four
ounces Of Jad Salts from any phar-
macy; take tablespoonful in a glass
of water before breakfast and in a
few days your kidneys will act fine.
This famous salts is made from the
acid of grapes and lemon Juice, COM
bined with lithia, and has been used
for generations to flush and stimulate
the kidneys, also to neutralize the
acids in urine SO 1t no longer causes
irritation, thus ending bladder weak
ness.
Jad Salts is inexpensive and can
not injure; makes a delightful effer.
vescent Whitewater drink which
everyone should take now and then
to keep the kidneys clean and active
and the blood pure, thereby avoiding
serious kidney complications
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1918-04-12
DARKEN GRAY HAIR,
LOOK YOUNG,PRETTY
Sage Tea and Sulphur Darkens
So Naturally that No
body can tell.

Hair that loses its color and lustre,
or when 1t fades, turns gray, dull and
lifeless, is caused by lack of sulphur
in the hair. Our grandmother made
up mixture Of Sage Tea and Sulphur
to keep her locks dark and beautiful,
and thousands of women and men who
value that even color, that beautiful
dark shade of hair which is so at
tractive, use only this old-time recipe.
Nowadays we get this famous mix
ture improved by the addition of other
ingredients by asking at any drug
store for a 50-cent bottle of "Wyeth's
Sage and Sulphur Compound" which
darkens the hair SO naturally, so even
ly, that nobody can possibly tell 1t
has been applied. You just dampen
a sponge or soft brush with 1t and
draw this through your ha.r, taking
one small strand at time. BY morn
ing the gray hair disappears; but
what delights the ladies with Wyeth's
Sage and Sulphur Compound, is that,
besides beautifully darkening the hair
after few applications. 1t also brings
back the gloss and lustre and gives 1t
an appearance of abundance.
Wyeth's Sage and Sulphur Com.
pound is delightful toilet requisite
to impart color and youthful appear
ance to the hair. 1t is not intended
for the cure, mitigation or prevention
OF disease.-Adv.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1918-04-12

bureaus investigations In 1906, for
the size of the average load hauled
has nearly doubled since then. A days
haul Of wheat in 1906 was SO bushels ;
now 1t is 112 bushels. In 1906 1,7OO
pounds of cotton was hauled in n
day; now the average daily haul is
5000 pounds.
The inquiry developed the fact that
the loads hauled In the cotton country
are the smallest but the most valu-
able Thus the average value of a
load of cotton was found to be $1S3,
wheat SAB and corn SOS. The longest
hauls were found to be in the Rocky
mountain states, where Nevada holds
the record with an average haul for
all farmers Of IS miles. The shortest
hauls were shown to be in the middle
West, Ohio at the bottom Of the list
with four miles.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1918-04-12
BIG GOOD ROADS DIVIDENDS
Motorists Of Massachusetts, Spent $25,
100000 Last Season, as Result
Of Good Roads.

Motorists spent 100000 in Massa-
chusetts last season, largely as a re-
suit of the good roads of that state.
Rather fine dividend
Great progress has been made In I'M
proving the roads In Minnesota, but
there are communities which as yet,
apparently, see but one side to the
good roads question, and that Is, cap
ital going out and no dividends COM
Ing back. While the returns from
motor travel are indirect, neverthe-
less they are certain. 1t is obvious
that any town Is at least indirectly
benefited by having such good roads
that motorists delight in making 1t an
objective on their weekend tours.
Any district that has bad roads be-
comes Just as well known, but Of
course adversely. Unfortunately, too
many specific cases might be given
Minneapolis Journal.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1918-04-12

Bright eyes, clear skin, and rosy
cheeks, follow the use of the "Pre-
scription."
All women require tonic and nerv-
inc at some period of their lives.
Whether suffering from nervousness,
dizziness, faintness, displacement, ca
tarrhal inflammation, bearing-down
sensations, or general debility, the
Prescription" is sure to benefit. In
tablet and liquid form.
DR., Pierce's Pellets were first put in
ready-to-use form nearly so years ago,
and will always relieve the inactive
liver and biliousness. Insist on getting
DR.. Pierce's Pleasant Pellets-there is
none SO good.-Adv.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1918-04-12
Laugh When People
Step On Your Feet
Try this yourself then pass
II along to others.
1t works!

Ouch ?!?! This kind of rough
talk will be heard less here in town If
people troubled with corns will follow
the simple advice of this Cincinnati
authority, who claims that few drops
Of drug called freezone when applied
to a tender, aching corn or hardened
callous stops soreness at once, and
soon the corn or callous dries up and
lifts right off without pain.
He says freezone dries Immediately
and never inflames or even irritates
the surrounding skin. A small bottle
of freezone will cost very little at any
drug store, but will positively remove
every hard or soft corn or callous
from ones feet. Millions of Americas 8
women will welcome this announce
ment since the Inauguration of the
high heels. II your druggist doesn't
have freezone tell him to order small
bottle for you.-Adv.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1918-04-12
HAULING CROPS TO MARKET
Average Farmer Must Haul His Prod
ucts Six and One-HaIf Miles
Other Points.


How far must the average farmer
In the United States haul his crop
to market? Exactly six and half
miles, 1t can be answered, for the bu-
reau of crop estimates of the depart
ment Of agriculture has completed an
inquiry into the whole matter Of farm
hauling throughout the country. In
cidentally, the results Of the inquiry
show that If only one wagon were
available to haul crops 1t would re-
quire about 15,747000 days for 1t to
complete the job for only the mar
keted portion Of three most prominent
farm products-wheat, corn and cot
ton.
The investigation shows that 1t re-
quires about half a day for the aver
age farmer to make round trip to
market, and about two-thirds of day
on the average for the farmers farth-
est from market to make similar
trip. That market distances are grow
ing shorter is shown by the fact that
In 1906 1t required almost so per cent
more time for the average round trip.
One reason for the improved condl-
tions, 1t is pointed out, Is that since
1906 the steam railroad mileage in
the United States has increased 10 per
cent and that many new freight-car-
rylng electric lines have been built.
Another point brought out by the.
inquiry Is that there has been marked
Improvement in public roads since the
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1918-04-12

Highway building in Indiana will be
accentuated by the war, rather than
stopped, state officials announce. Plans
have been completed for the building
of 500 miles of paved roads next year,
at an estimated expenditure Of nearly
$3,000,000. One road will extend from
the Great Lakes to the Ohio river and
three will traverse the state from the
Ohio to the Illinois lines.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1918-04-12
Greatly Improve Road.

BY keeping a road drag and drag
glng the road along ones land after
heavy rains the road may be greatly
improved. 1t is an easy matter to
have an agreement so each farmer
will drag the road In front of his
farm. This would maintain the road
till the regular hands could be called
out ut stated intervals or till the COM
missioner could make the repairs.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1918-04-12
Watch Your Skin Improve.

On rising and retiring gently smear
the face with Cuticura Ointment. Wash
off Ointment in five minutes with Gu
tcura Soap and hot water. For free
sample address "Cuticura, Dept. x,
Boston, At druggists and by mail.
Soap 25, Ointment 25 and 50.--Adv.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1918-04-12
WESTERN Truck ATTACHMENT
Kept Busy.

Things are not like they were in
the old days"
How so?"
1--WE don't think as much of one an
other as we once did"
Cant. Nowadays much Of our think
ing must be devoted to keeping out Of
the way of automobiles. louisville
Courier-Journal
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1918-04-12
A Eriend,s Advice.

"This man has been widower for
20 years"
"Well,"
"Shall / marry him?"
you're taking chances. It's another
case of Rip Van Winkle. He'll expect
you to run the house on his first wife's
schedule of costs" louisville Courier
Journal.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1918-04-12
A HustIinu Town,

~ TTUoEIIIf9 EVVETfs
Lord Northcliffe, at a farewell din
ner, expressed his admiration for
American hustle.
"On train the other day." he said,
"I heard dialogue that brought out
your bustling qualities beautifully.
"1'm from Ashton said man.
Finest little town in the Middle West
"'Ashton? sneered another man. I
don't think much of Ashton
"'You don't? When were you there
last? said the first man.
""Two weeks ago.
ooh, WE'LL said the Ashtonian, you
ought to see her w!'"-Pittsburgh
Chronicle Telegraph.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1918-04-12
A woMAN's HEAD is level and her

ID level anu u6I
judgment good
when she puts
her faith In DR..
Pierce's Favor
lite Prescription.
There is n o
beauty without
good health. No
body expects to
become really
beautiful from
the use of COM
plexion beauti-
fiers.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1918-04-12
A Sleepy Humorlst.

Mrs. Timmid - John, wake up!
There's man downstairs; Pm sure
l heard a noise that sounded like
yawn.
Husband-Oh, go to sleep. What you
heard was probably the rubber plant
stretching itself.-Exchange.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1918-04-12
Double Value.

"Do you think your daughter is going
to do well for herself in marrying that
young actor?"
"Sure she is, for he Is an unusual
combination. He is both promising
and performing young man."-Balti-
more American.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1918-04-12

Rookie-Why is that ferocious-look-
ing Turk prisoner weeping SO better
ly?
Lieutenant-He was captured by a
man wearing wrist watch.-London
Punch.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1918-04-12
Addition.

Teacher - Adding two different
things together doesn't make more
of one. For instance, if you add an
apple to an orange you don't get more
apple.
Johnny-But, teacher, if y u add
piece of meat to a dog you get more
dog.-Boston Transcript.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1918-04-12
ALIENS FooT.EAsE DOES 1T.

When your shoes pinch or your Corns and Bum
ions ache. get Aliens Foot-Ease, the antiseptic
powder to be shaken into shoes and sprinkled in
the foot-bath. Gives instant relief to Tired, Ach-
ing, Tender Feet. Sample FREE. Address Allen
S. 0lmsted, Leroy, New York,
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1918-04-12
Got 'em All Spotted.

For one thing, looking for sugar
takes one out into the open and ac-
quaints one with the grocery geo.
graphy of ones section.-Chicago
News,
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1918-04-12

No longer can it be said that the
small town literary clubs meet BIZ
weekly to discuss salad dressings.
Now they meet to discuss surgical
dressing.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1918-04-12
Speaking Gently.

"You say he has a lovely disposi-
tion?"
Wonderfully lovely have known
him to go all over the golf links and
never say anything more emphatic
than oh, fudgeh h"-Exchange.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1918-04-12

miss Oldgirl says she doesn't pre-
tend to be brilliant nor witty nor wise.
She is just plain woman"
plain! Great Scott, but she is good
to herself. ."-Exchange
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1918-04-12

Horace (earnestly)-Dearest, If
were you I couldn't live without me-
London Taller.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1918-04-12

He-Have the car ready at the ad-
miralty at 4:30.
Chauffeuse-Very well.
Helm accustomed to being ad-
dressed as "My Lord"
She-I am accustomed to being ad-
dressed as "My Lady"
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1918-04-12
Traditional Courage

"Pop, are the Crow Indians harder
to fight than any other kind?"
"Not that l know of. What makes
you think so?"
"Well, pop, crow never shows the
white feather, does it?"-Exchange.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1918-04-12

The Portland man who used his
trousers for pillow and had them
stolen by burglar should wear them
to bed in the future if he does not
want to lose 'em.-Waterville Sentinel.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1918-04-12
Very Much So.

eve had alarming news at oul
house yesterday morning."
What was it?"
"Our alarm clock went off an hour
too soon." ."-Exchange.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1918-04-12

'How is your son getting on with
the law?"
"Fine. He is already prosecuting his
studies. ."-Exehange
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1918-04-12

"Are you going to amuse yourself
next summer by making a garden?"
"Amuse myself? No. I'm going to
make garden and sit up nights with
it."
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1918-04-12

Edgar"
Eyes, mother" .
"What are you children doing?"
playing royalty. | am Knight of
the Garter and Edwin is Saturday"
"That is an odd name for royalty"
"Oh, it is just a nickname on account
Of his title"
"What is his title?"
might of the Bath"
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1918-04-12

He-Darling, you're looking prettier
every day.
She-Then why do you want to
marry me so soon? Why not wait,
If that's the e?-Brooklyn Citizen.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1918-04-12

Miss Young-You can't believe half
a man says when he's In love.
Mrs. Wyse-That's easily accounted
for, my dear. Half the time he doesn't t
know what he's saying.-Exchange
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1918-04-12
Oh. Never!

About the beginning of February we
feel that we will never hate beauti-
full yellow dandelion on our lawn again.
-Des Moines Register.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1918-04-12

Pure blood is essential to Good
Health. Garfield Tea dispels impuri-
ties. cleanses the system and eradi-
Gates disease.-Adv.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1918-04-12

"Leglongs" are something new to
knit for soldiers. They sound like just
the thing to wait for street car in.-
Pittsburg Gazette Times.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1918-04-12

An Indiana woman found a hundred.
dollar pearl in an oyster. Now will you
let up on pork and eat sea things?-
Washington Herald.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1918-04-12

Without knowing exactly what Pc
tard is, we hope the kaiser has one in
good hoisting ondition.-Washington
Post.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1918-04-12

Passengers on water wagons this
year are advised to keep sharp look
out for hostile periscopes.-Chicago
News.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1918-04-12

II the first robin Is discreet 1t will
avoid coming around on meatless day.
Chicago News.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1918-04-12

Good health cannot be maintained
where there is constipated habit.
Garfield Tea overcomes constipation.
-AdY.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1918-04-12

"I wouldn't go to that milliner for
an opinion"
"Why not?"
Doesn't her business make her a
r?"-Baltimor American.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1918-04-12

Took Preparatory Course.
"The auctioneer seems to know his
business"
Eyes. Knocking down is his spe-
cialty. He used to be a pugilist."
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1918-04-12
Evidence to the Contrary.

"Sir, this clock will last you life
time"
"How can that be when I can see
for myself that its hours are num-
bered ?"-Exchange
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1918-04-12

Garfield Tea, taken regularly, will
correct both liver and kidney dis
orders.-Adv.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1918-04-12
Pertinent Suggestion.
What are commons, pop?"
"Why, foOd--rations.
"Then, pop, Is hotel q house o.


Did She Mean III
Bashful Visitor--Don't you love soil.
tude?
Girl-Yes, stay while longer,
please.-Boston Globe.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1918-04-12

DR.. Pierce's Pellets are best for liver,
bowels and stomach. One little Pellet
for laxative three for a cathartic.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1918-04-12
That's What We Think.

Early rising in a cold flat imparts
efficiency and speed in dressing
Chicago News.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1918-04-12
Not a Real Feed.

Not Real Feed.
Say, John?"
"Well?"
"Did you feed the furnace?"
you could hardly call 1t feeding. I
did give 1t little light lunch, so to
speak. "-Louisville Courier-Journal.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1918-04-12

Why Not.
He--I have half mind to kiss you.
She-I have half mind to let you.
Cupid-Go to 1t, you boob-two
halves make a whole.-Florida Times.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1918-04-12
Slxteen-Foot Roadway.
War HELPS Good Roads.

Maintain at least 16-foot road
way.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1918-04-12
MONEY FOR YOU.

Thousands of trained young people needed.
8ehnke-Walker Business College, Portland. places
students in positions Enroll any time. Free
Catalogue.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1918-04-12

-NVUuC TUT ETVTTIY'
Motto to hang In hen houses An
egg day keeps the hatchet away
Irish World.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1918-04-12
Sure Thing

Sure Thing.
"This sugar shortage is terrible"
Eyes; it's getting the country into
a sweet mess" s."-Exchange.
The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1918-04-12

We're Still Listening.
Wilhelm never has observed that
he'd rather be right than kaiser
Louisville Courier-J Journal.
The Leader, enterprise and press. (Fitzgerald, Ga.) 1915-1921, 1918-10-16
G. H. JOHNSON

a long distance message from At
lanta last night announced the death
OF George H. Johnson at sanitariurl
in that city. Mrs. Johnson and chill
dren were already in the Atlanta
sleeper enroute to that city when the
message reached here, and were join
cd by Mr.. w. B. Hammock, brother,
in-law of Mrs. Johnson, who accom-
panied the family on their sad mis-
sion.
The remains will be brougll. to
Fitzgerald for interment.
Mr.. Johnson left here several weeks
ago to have all operation performed
in hopes of restoring him to health,
but he gradually grew worse until
the end came
He leaves devoted young wife and
two small children to mourn his loss.
The Leader, enterprise and press. (Fitzgerald, Ga.) 1915-1921, 1918-10-16
RED CROSS CHAPTER IS
MEETING EVERY CALL

At meeting of the executive COM
mittee of the Red Cross Tuesday
morning, the reports of the various
chairmen of the subcommittee
proved an interesting chapter in the
current history of this city's activi-
ties in the war work. Mr.. J. L. Dor
miney, chairman of the Drive for
Clothing for the Belgians, reported
having shipped 1000 pounds of cloth
ing and wearing apparel of excellent
condition to the New York head
quarters for trans-shipment.
Mrs. M. w. Garbutt as chairman
of the Linen Committee for the Red
Cross hospitals, reported having
shipped double the amount of linen
called for from this chapter, gener-
ously donated by the citizens of Fitz-
gerald. also $4,000 turned into the To-
cal treasury, amounts donated by in
dividual citizens in lieu of linen.
Miss Esther King, treasurer, re-
ported the treasury being in pros
porous conditions, some $93222 on
hand at this time. A meeting of the
entire membership of the Chapter
will be held next Wednesday for the
annual election of officers and the ap-
pointment of committees for the
coming year. An official notice of
this meeting will be issued by Chair
man Z. K Farmer.
The Leader, enterprise and press. (Fitzgerald, Ga.) 1915-1921, 1918-10-16
GEORGIA-FLORIDA FAIR
OPENING POSTPONED

The management of the Georgia
Florida Fair at Valdosta has agreed
with the health authorities that it is
best to protect the health of the coun-
try, and in the interest of the visi-
tors to the fair has postponed the
opening until such time as the danger
of spreading the influenza has passed
The disease is not ALARMING in this
section of the South and the health
authorities are very much encourage
ed over the effect that the prompt &C
ton taken III each county has had in
stopping the malady.
1t is the intention of the manage
ment to open the fair on Monday
November 18th, with the great gov
ernment&exhibits and all other ex-
hibits and attractions engaged for
the dates first set.