The Butler weekly times and the Bates County record. (Butler, Mo.) 1918-1950, 1918-08-15


; cross-eyed he could look at his owl
= head and who couldn't whistle a tun
to save his life and yet he was musi
: lover. And smiles? Well, if there i
anything that Will take You farthe
and get you more for less money thar
smile, don't know what it is. Blu
when you combine the two you hav,
a combination which can't be beat
The man who whistles and smiles i,
to be trusted. | would trust such ;
man from here to there and bach
again. Davy Crockett knew the value
of smile. He was great hunter
He would go into the woods coon
hunting. Locate coon in a tree then
seat himself on a log or stump and
smile or grin at the coon in such 4
friendly way that the coon would
climb down from the tree and sur
render SO it will be with you.
Whistle, sing and smile. no matter
what the situation nor how dark be
the day and the obstacles will be re
moved. The clouds will lift. the rain
bow of hope will CLEAN above YOU
land the whole earth will bask i'll the
sunshine OF your smile,
For the benefit OF the narrow mind
cd parties who animated that Mr.
Hoover would take ofiense at my
Jokes about his Administrations. | will
say first-Mr. Hoover is much too
busy to notice anything may say
and end, if there be any joke about it
am the joke. l have rigidly OBJ
served every rule. have oheyed his
every mandate. have Iooverizcd
till it has become habit which i
fear will be hard to cure. Why.
actually, would no more think OF
eatin' all want than | would al
tcllin the truth. am a living e>-
ample OF conservation From a we'll
fed, corpuient citizen, have degrner-
ated into a "slat." am So thin tina; |
the doctor don't have to use an X
Ray machine to get a photo OF what !
goin on inside. Joke? Wen, Mr., |
Hoover may think I'm jokin' but as
one who is on the verge of starvation
| give you my word it is no joke, but
a very stern reality, Hoping this ex-
PLANTATION will relieve the pressure ON
the three corncrcd brain oi the in
significant blot on creation who
Though still damp with the dews OF
his YOUTH feels that he has arrived
at MAN $ estate. shall consider the
incident closed unless---he repeats tn"
offense
The primary has came and went
Some candidates have paid the price
Of politics and after months oi vast
cd time and energy have rrapcd
nothing but leaves. 1t is matter OF
regret and yet, such things needs
must be- Men TOO often exalt the
ego and become inflated with sell
to an extent that impels
them TO reach ont for the. unattain-
able and to some the result is newt ;
ably disappointment. | do not refer :
o our local primary specially, but to =,
politics generally, | said in for !
ner article that the most effective
way Chat | knew of) to find out :
me 5 standing or importance in any ,
community was to run for office.
Cnqliet meals make i'll Digestion +
saw this in a paper. Now, | call !
ucl1 talk irrelevant, incompetent anu y
almosD impairment. How in the +
lame of all the prophets can TELLER {
lclp bcir' quiet when he goes to the !;
able these days Why, there amt Y
nything on our table to make noise /
is. don't even feel like
akin to my plate any more.
A party on learning that am rails
lg geese thought to disturb the SER
nifty OF my good nature Che blamed =,
Ugh succceded) by asking me How N
ing can goose stand on one foot?'
hats stale one. You all know the a
nswer, SO | let it pass. Then he "
'anted to know to what age a goose X
'ould live to be. Well" says | (as +,
reached for club) Il can't say for
ure, but ] am pretty certain that S;
DOSE will live quite bit longer than t,
ONE folks who go round askin' such q,
amfool questions" Maybe I was c,
it hasty. but the fact is the word is
goose" produces about the same ef- v,
ect on me as shakin' red rag in the fo
ace of j Mexican bull does. 6,
Headlne-"How Long Will He'll II,
asst" Now, haven't the remotest tc
lea. But it's just got to last till we
nish this war. Where else can we m
end the flat heads SO that they would Ia
eel at home? He'll will probably last "
S long as eternity. How long will ri
ternity last do you ask? l answer Z;
Quien sabe." In;
A certain party has taken excep- c,
ions to what l said hast week about d;
ducated apes Dear me, you should ii
ave heard him. I listened to His dia- K
ribe until tired nature could endure ii
o more and then l asked him if he e:
laimed to be an educated ape. mo, eli
ir," said he, most emphatically I do c,
OF" "Oh, WE'LL" says 1, "then you