Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1918-05-01
The OTHER ANGLE
Be a Salesman!
BY KIRK MILLER.

Next to wanting to be the man tnIthe
moon and the clown in the circus. every
American youth and youthess has at
one time or another in his career aided
and abetted a secret desire to be
salesman e to sell something - and
here's your chance.
You've got what's left Of today and
three additional gyrations Of the earth in
which to prove to your Uncle Sam that
you could sell set Of sails to sub
marine If you had two samples. and the
thing that It's up to you to peddle Is
something that the whole world has gone
bugs over-liberty.
That's what you're dispensing When you
get the bird who plants his war garden
next door to yours to annex liberty pond
along with his other patriotic purchases
and If he don't inscribe his name on q
pledge card before Saturday snen you We
got a legal right to toss all OF your FISH
worms over the back fence into his gar
den so they can eat his cabbases right
loose from his corn beef.
If YOU ever planned starting out on the
career Of a salesman you've got a little
over three days in which to turn demo-
cratic and buttonhole every star-spangied
citizen who's got the cheek to smirk
around in the acoustics and inhaie all our
free ozone without helping Uncle Sam to
pay the installments on the ozophone
And don't let your prospective client
Hthink he is doing you favor by sepa-
rating himself from the first symptom OF
a liberty bond purchase. Show him that
he owes you an apology for waiting for
YOU to come around and that mes only
paying the first premium on me lnsur
ance policy that he doesn't have to curl
IN and die on before he can iniale its
that's what a liberty bond is. folks.
a life insurance policy with the most
r.
anteed : not : to fade. stano without
hitching company on the northern
fringe Of North America. And IL you
don't want to make sure OF your future
here. where 2-cent stamps only cost
cents and twelve inches still make
foot then YOU can remain a passive
patriotic parasite and let your next
door neighbor keep the air raiders from
knocking home run into your ROOF
garden and spelling the new bathroom
plumbing.
man has to install in his selling ward
robe is an argument and desire UNI
derneath the vest of his victim for the
thing which he is trying to shed.
But in inoculating people with liberty
bonds YOU don't need either. All who
are devoting their lives to Tapping
around this universe like a revolving
door at a white linen sale wants lib
erty bond to protect themselves from
getting tangled up in the squirrel cage.
that's what the kaiser is trying to do.
He wants to push the galloping door
around the other way and Keep all the
goodies for himself and crowd out the
public; and if you stand passtvely by
and let him pull the hidden-ba!l trick
on you, he's likely to get. all the way
around to third base and on home be-
fore you know you are hit
So you don't need any argument to
sell the goober who sits in the swivel
chair next to you pa+n at least nd a tts
day mighty There's no argument
there is any protest against bread and
butter. schools and churches. trench
coats and lavender stationery or Palm
Beach suits and brown derbies-they're
all part and parcel OF our daily
scenery. and now its up to us to let
our dollars dash out and preserve the
right to inhale them in habit forming
capsules.
, Every one wants liberty bond, only
every one hasn't been inoculated with
the desire. and you've got to be the
Make this old liberty bond SO con-
tagious that it busts loose into a
raging epidemic that viii rage right
up the Hapsburg ,a sho%lder6iade: eat
rate 'em from their fiat chests and
liberate their bad intentions from
their queer ambitions.
Quarantine your own country and
that Of the allies by dropping bar
rage of liberty bonds across the At
lantic that will make those seventy
five-mile noberts look like a cap pistol
at wild west show.
Men-Subscription or CONSUMPTION?
Observation-Disclosures or bondwoman?
Stick to the band wagon and play the
game. Threes beat two pairs, and the
kaiser has checked the bet-to you.