Highland recorder. (Monterey, Highland County, Va.) 1877-1972, 1918-11-22
FROM CROWN PRINCE
TO PAPA
published by rcGuest)

tFuDllSueQ Dy fGIueSL)
From Somewhere in France
In his retirement before the Ameri-
cans the Crown Prince has seen fit
to address q letter to tie Kaiser. The
letter is printed in full, as follows:
Dear Papa:
I am writing on the run, as der
brave and glorious soldiers under my
command have not seen der Rhine
for SO long dat dey have started back
dat way, and Of course I an going
nit dem. Oh! Papa, der has been
some offol dings happened here in
France. First l started in my big
offensive which was to crush de fool
Americans, but dey know SO little
about military tactics dat dey will
not be crushed, shust like l want dem
I sent my men in der fight in big
waves, and ven dey got to der Amer
leans dey all said Boo as loud as
dey could holler. Veil according to
vat you have always told me, de
Americans would have turned and
run like blaZes, but vat do you
think; dem fool Americans don't
know anything about war, instead Of
running de odder way, dey come
right toward us. Some of dem vas
singing someding about eve Won't
Come Back Till It's Over, Over
Therefor some odder foolish song,
and some Of dem we're laughing like
fools. Dey are so ignorant. But
dey are awful reckless nit dere guns
and ven dey come toward us it vas
den dat my men took de notion dey
wanted to go back to der deer old
Rhine. We don't like de dirty old
Marine River, anyhow, and, Oh!Papa
dem Americans use such awful Ian
guage. Deg know noting of kultur
and say such offel dings right be-
fore Us. And dey talk blasphemy
too. Vat ~; sjnkdoy said right in
front of my face? Vun big husky
from de place called Arizona, he
said Oh! Pcp2, hate to tell you vat
III awful ting he said tI:t cant help
It, he said "To Hell Nit De Kaiser.
DID you ever hear anytingso ofcl?
I Wouldn't stand and hear such an off
81 ting, it made me so mad, so l turn
ed around and run nit der oIder
boys, was I right? ? And Oh! Papa
you know dem breastplates vat you
sent us, can you send some more to
put on our backs? You know We
are going de odder way now, and
hreastplates are no good, fer de
cowardly Americans are shooting
lis in de backs. Some Of our boys
took off der breastplates and put dem
on der backs; but der fool Ameri-
cans are playing us Der Star Span
gled Banner" nit machine guns on
der plates, can't you help us? You
remember your speech in vich you
saidnotting could stand against de
brave German Soldiers? Oh! Papa,
[ don't believe desc ignorant Amer
cans ever read your speech, for Gcy
run after us chust the sameas We vas
a lot of rabbits. Vat you tink OF dat?
Can't you send dem some of your
speeches right away? Dcy don't
know how terrible We are. Can't
you move my army back in Belgium?
we're We Won our glory Ny men can
vip all de vimmen\and children dat
de Belgiums can bring Us, but desc
Americans are SO rough and igno-
rant. We can't make dem understan
dat We are de greatest soldiers on
earth, and ven We try to sing" Deut-
schland Ubber Ales' dey laugh like
q lot of monkeys. But We are get
ting de best Of dem Americans. We
can out run dem. Papa, if We are j..
not de best fighters on earth We are
de best runners. No body can keep
up nit US We tink of de deer old
Rhine and my army never did tink
so much of dot deer old river. Let
me know vat to do by return post
office right away.
Your son,
Crown Prince Willie.