New-York tribune., 1918-03-20
Shoes and Ships
And Sealing Wax
Forty-seven track walkers, Mr.. Shonts
informs us, go through the subway on
foot each day. The lucky stiffs!


informs us, go through the subway on
foot each day. The lucky stiffs!
| When you've battled to the subway
car and lodged the closing door, and
you've perched upon the feet of those
who have theirs on the floor, and some
one that's behind you takes youI back
bone for his rest, while a dame you
never saw before is plastered on your
chest, and another wears an ostrich
plume that dusts your helpless face,
and it seems you will grow senle e'er
you get to Astor Place: when the man
who lives on garlic breathes its essence
down~your neck, and your chances of
check-oh, then, with wishbone caving
in, how cheering 'tis to see Mr.. Shonts's
timely placard on the growth of cour-
tesy!
Somehow we don't trust spring this
year. Poets may assert that she walked
abroad Yesterday. If she did-the
hussy! we'll bet she held one hand be-
hind her and in that gripped an icicle
as a blackjack.
If George Borden Goldsboro. n. C.,
negro. could save enough from his
household expenses to buy service
flag, it would put the banners displayed
by some corporations to shame.
George has fourteen sons in the SER
vice of Uncle Sam, who is helping Mr..
Borden in war against autocracy. 1t
is sort of lonely for George since his
boys went away. There are only
thirteen smaller Bordens about the
house now. Were Roosevelt still Presi-
dent their father would get Congress
sional appropriation or something. He
has been married three times, and has
fathered four sets Of quadruplets.
Captain Hawkins, of the Royal Brit
ish Artillery, had been speaking of the
mud in Flanders. Horses, he said, sank
to their girths in it, and it was physi-
cal impossibility to move anything
heavy across country.
"a couple of Tommies were trudging
slowly across waste of mud one day.
he said, "when one noticed hat
directly in front of him. He stopped to
pick it up, and beneath the hat saw a
face.
"After bit of digging the pair ex-
tractcd the face from the mud and
found it to belong to another Tommy
Then one of them said:
"I say, old top, you were bit low
down just now, weren't you?'
"'Not near so low >as you might
. think the Tommy answered promptly
I was on top bloomin' omnibus al
the time"
John Foster Carr, secretary of the
Immigrant Publication Society, who is
publicity agent for the book drive ii
front of the Public Library, tells this
at his own expense. While barking
through his megaphone yesterday he
saw woman passing briskly down the
aver ue with two books under her arm
With some hesitation he called out
would not the lady with the two
volumes who is passing like to give
them to the soldiers ?" With patriot,
, alacrity she tripped up the steps
/ handed him the books and then hur
, ried on her way.
= AS soon as Mr.. Carr was free from
y his now familiar call of "Rummage
= rummage, rummage in your library fo
: books for soldiers and Sailors" h,
, satisfied his curiosity as to the vol
umnes, which proved to be merely dunn
mics of new novels from we'll know
publishing house. Mr.. Carr is nov
waiting for the lady to bring in he
substitute gift Of real books.