The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1918-06-29
DeteCkatiVe
NEE SCHOOL OF DETECTING.

40 "aS ah6iy with ulIuSeu ne naQ
talked too we'll. He had talked SO well
he had talked himself out Of a break
fast. He had proved SO thoroughly that
he was a detective that p. Gubb would
not believe he was hungry.
See here, bo." he said suddenly, rs
this straight about you being a de-
tective, or is it a bluff?"
Philo Gubb showed Chi Foxy the
badge he had received upon completion
OF his correspondence school course.
I'm the most celebrated and only
deteckative in the town of Riverbank,
Iowa." he said seriously, land you can
ask the sheriff or the chief Of police
II you don't believe me. I'm working
right now onto a case of quite some
importance. into which a calf was
stolen. but up to now the clues amt
what they should be. If you don't
think I'm deteckative you can ask
Farmer Hopper. He hired me for to
stealer aforesaid"
Chi Foxy studied Gubb's simple face
And can you arrest a Teller and
lodge him in jail?" he asked
I've arrested many and lodged them
into JAIL" P. Gubb assured him.
We'll. bo." said Chi Foxy, I'm the
man you're looking for. I'm as guilty
as dirt. Arrest me-"
Tho tramp knew enough about ar
rests to know that even a suspect when
lodged in Jail would be fed. and he was
hungry. and getting hungrier every
moment p. Gubb looked at him with
immense surprise.
I thought you said you was q de-
teckattve." he said.
I am" said Foxy; TN ono of tho
greatest in the world. or wouldn't
know I was a criminal detected It
Even my old friend Shermlock Hollums
couldn't detect 1t, but did. I'm "a
murderer, am! There's a thousand
dollar reward offered for me-"
Then why don't you arrest your
self and get the reward?" asked Gubb
Say" said Chi Foxy. with disgust,
you never heard of a detective arrest
ing himself. did you? It can't be done.
know. for I've tried. I've grabbed
myself and tried to take myself to jail,
ana as soon as I got hold of myself
break away from myself and run. No,
DO. It can't be done. How do you
think q swell detective like me would
get to be SO low he'd be begging a
breakfast in a tall-grass town like
this7 Runnin' away from myself. that's
how! I'm q fugitive, that's what I
| am I'm a poor, chased. frightened
fugitive. fleeing everywhere to keep
| out Of the clutches of the law. And
right behind me, no matter where I
nee to. comes myself. ready to grab
me and arrest me. That's the kind Of
| a detective I am-what get on a trail
never let up. I've chased myself all
over Europe, Asia and Africa, and I
can't grab myself. lists amful!"
Chi Foxy wiped an imaginary tear.
And I can't keep away from the
scene Of my crime" he said. II come
back here time after time"
ibid you do the murder here?" asked
p. Cub. with increased interest.
That's what did," said Chi Foxy.
Il did 1t hero. And back here I come,
like criminals always do. And I'm
weary tryin' to escape from myself.
| and I'm ready now to give myself up.
Como ahead and arrest me for dom
| that murder and take me down to the
| lookup. Me and you can hold me-"
IT'S somewhat out Of the ordinary
common run for a Teller to be a de-
teckative and the criminal murderer
he's chasing both at once" said Gubb.
That's SO. amt it," agreed Chi
Foxy. 1T looks that way. can see
how you'd naturally feel about 1t.
You'd think It was out Of the ordinary.
| I would myself. II anybody just told
me that much. But facts are facts"
"Quite occasionally they are such. !"
agreed P. Gubb.
That's right" said Chi Foxy, land
| all you've got to do Is to explain them.
You see. DO, was a young Teller when
I murdered this old miser-"
What did you say his nane was?"
| asked P. Gubb.
Smith," said Chi Foxy promptly:
John L. Smith. and he lived right
here in this town. I was a young fell
| Ter, workin' for him, and I took an
axe and killed him and went of with
his money: but I done it and got
away, and nobody suspected me. My
name was-was Jones. Henry J. Jones.
And murdered the old fellow and got
| away. Nobody cared much whether the
old Teller was murdered or not, and
nothin' much might have been said Of
| 1t, except that the old Teller had a
nephew His name was Smith-Peter
J. Smith
what did he do?" asked P. Gubb.
HE offered a remward Of a thousand
dollars" said Chi FOXY. About a
| thousand detectives tried to solve the
I celebrated case. Nobody knew but me.
| and I wasn't tellin' it."
II should think not" said P. Gubb.
mo, sir!" said Chi Foxy. II skipped
up the river. and nobody thought of
| looking for me. because I wasn't sus-
pected. And then I did a fool thing"
"Murderers most always does"
"Sure!' said Chi Foxy. Il thought
| I'd 60 to New Orleans. So I got a
| steamer ticket and started Gown the
| river It was all right-Eice trip. Until
we got to Dubuque. And then what
| happened? The old steamer up and
bust her boiler and blew up. 1 was
sittin' on the top deck Just over the
| boiler when she blew up. and she sent
me higher than a kite. I went sailin'
| I'D in the air like one Of those here
skyrockets, 1 did. and when l come
| down 1 lit head first
TT is a remarkable wonder 1t didn't
kill you to DEATH said P. Gubb.
Amt it7" said Chi Foxy. But 1t
did worse than kill me- When I come
to I didn't remember a thing out OF
"a