The weekly Alaska citizen., 1918-06-03

peace coaxed out from his hiding place. and they all went up Cush. man street looking for an alien en. emy to capture.
 BILL Mrs. Kate Faley, once WAS familiar figure on STUMPED. the streets. is becom. ing feeble from age but she strolls out occasionally and has lost none of her Irish wit. Billie Butler met her on the street short time ago and being an ad- mirer and old friend. said, Hello. kid," as he met her.
 Now. Willie" she replied. Don't call me that or the bys in Hoyt and Killys Fl think we're engaged"
 WHICH Last week a large IS THE auto beautifully paint. TIN LIZZIE ed. olive-green and chrome.yellow got stuck in the mud near Halls baths. It sputtered and groaned but still stuck. In front of the N. c. plant a young man. with bronze" hair, observed the predicament oi the car and cranked up a little old Ford, battered and paint blistered that outwardly looked as if it was ready for the scrap pile, but the young Samaritan knew his business. He cranked up few times and jerked away on his errand of mercy. The old reliable whizzed along over the top turned around and pulled the stylish King s" out without any trouble and slid along home while the driver of the big tin Lizzie rode |'up the street with slow dignity.
 HAUNTED The Citizen shop has BUT GHOST been the scene of DIDN'T WAlkmany conflicts and the floors have been soaked with the gore of our ad. versaries as we have killed them off in our editorials the past few years, so it is no wonder Dorman, our Linotypist, was a little nervous when the old familiar stump of the post (that once supported the upper story but now sawed off at the floor leaves small stump to stumble over) nodded to him.
 He rubbed his eyes and watched 1t as he worked the grave yard shift and 1t surely was moving up and down. It got on his nerves and he finally came rushing into the editors sanctum for witness. The pencil pushers went back with him just in time to see the post come bobbing up and toppling over on the floor. The high water had work ed 1t loose and finally shot it up into the air. Our perfectly sober operator was satisfied with his alibi and went back to hammering out commas and dashes for this Great Family Journal"
 AND THEN During the dark THE LIGHTS scenes of the movies FLASHED one of our young ladies who has be. come an adept at knitting sox for soldiers. kept right on with her work, watching the screen and her fingers flying nimbly back and for. ward.
 Two young men came in late and seated themselves in the adjoining chairs. After a few moments one whispered very gently to the other, Who is the lady next? I've made hit or she knows me for she keeps nudging me in the side and don't want to stare. Size her up if you can" Just then the film ended and the lights went on, and friend was the only man in the audience whose laughter rang out at "Finis" of an ordinary film.
 SIX DAYS Our chief of police SHALT THOU is so busy seven WORK. days each week with directing the conduct of the citizens. acting as truant of. ficer. curfew enforcer, kid bandit raider, sidewalk inspector, inspector of drains and sewers. and tabulator of baseball averages, that he has forgotten that there is such a day as Sunday and that 1t is a day of rest.
 Last Saturday evening he served notice on a minister of the gospel giving him twenty.four hours to re. place three cracked boards in the sidewalk in front of the house of God" wherein he holds worship. It is needless to say the reverend gen. tleman did (not) obey within the time limit
 FUTURE The younger children FEATURE in the school exer. FIlMieT6 cises held lost Wed.
 nesday showed how