Grand Forks herald. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1916-1955, 1918-03-04

ism, rare is the person who
S striyeseto' give the impression of
really good breeding. 1t is a So
cial art, this n of good breeding, now
I rclegated, as the saying goes, ITO the
good old days" The chief aim and am
bition of the truly modern man and wo-
man is t be distinctly individual, differ
ent, and i'll most cases, regardless of
ways and means. To express oneself is
the fad of the moment; and it really
isn't a bad idea, this one of individual
expression. But, its abuses are so many
as to obscure the main issue.
The obscuring abuses of a worthy ex-
preston of ones distinctness may be
summed up in a definite, sometimes de-
iberate disregard for the niceties Of the
social code. Unhampered individuality
to the ultra modcrnist means absolute
freedom from social obligations and
purposeful ignorance of ettiquet. Pc
culiarly gifted individuals. exceptionally.
handsome people, have SO much to make
up for their lack of "ffiesse" in other
things that people are disposed to over
look their" idiosyfcrasies."
But now a word about good breeding,
what constitutes it? Taste, fine SENSIBLE
lilies, a nice discrimination, keen percep-
tionj heart, sincerity, all enter into what
Is pleased to. be zcalled1"good breeding"
It is something unmistakable that may
be the. heritage of rich and poor alike /;
it graccs the" most sordid of common
places; where it is real, it gives the as
surance Of a high moral standard. Per-
maps you may not. be so fortunate as to
have had early opportunities; /" we'll, no
matter, if your desires arc strong in the
right direction, and your hearts in the
right place, the polish is not insurmount-
ably, difficult to acquire. To come down
to actualities, take careful note Of the
really wcll-bred persons whom you
know. You can not; but appreciate their
restfulness, their quiet. charm, Their
uloughtfulness, their mobility: Pcshap:
The first thing to. cultivate is control Of
" oneself Of ones feelings. Try not te
maintain q constant display Of impa:
ticncc; of petty grievances, of sham Ell
husias1n, Of i'll temper; in a word, d.
not iMflict your moods on people. How
can you expect to control others, t
command their constant respect, to re
tain their friendship, ii you can not con
troll yourself? 1t is all very we'll 70
geniuses and the like to have moods !;
The layman can not have moods an,
friends, or even a livelihood, at tn
) same time. 1t behoovcs the most of u.
then, to cultivate control Of our trouble
some selves.
And not let us consider individualit
or rather the desire to impress peopl
with sour particular individuality. i
nine cases out of ten, the desire. arise
from failure to attract attention: in an
other way. The girl. who is inclined t
be boistcrous, Or who realizes her def
ciencies socially, suddenly awakcns
:, 1.-THE belief that she is a type Straight
way she expresses herself, and she sut
ceedsy i'll becoming, through ~consciou
emphasis Of her dehciencies-a :carics
turc. So vanity it is that is at the DO,
tom Of the cult of individualism. How
ever. there arc SO many people sthrivin
to be distinctive that they are fast9mere
ing into a class, leaving the wise an
really wcll-bred person quite the cent?
of attraction.