davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-09-11
Labor s Great Rally
 Tomorrow Night

l 7NHE labor rally in Capitol park
 0 tomorrow night, under the
 auspices of the United States em- iployment service, will be an event of
 exceptional interest and of far-reach- | ing benefit.
 Several large meetings have been
 held in the Sixth employment service idistrict, comprising Georgia, Alabama,
 Mississippi, Tennessee, Louisiana and Florida, but it has been planned to
 make this the biggest and most inn
 portant of them all
 | Distinguished speakers will be present and the working men of the
 Birmingham district are expected to turn out en masse. The open air ,amphitheatre has a seating capacity tof seven thousand and there is a standing capacity around the speakers platform of seven thousand more. There should be no vacant places.
 Labor throughout the country IS in- Itensely patriotic and in no part of the United States has labor demon stiated it's loyalty to the government or its determination to help win the war with more whole-hearted impulse than in Jefferson county.
 Wage eagners, like employers, know what we are fighting for, and they are eager to do their part in bringing victory to freedoms cause.
 But the rally we are to have in Capi- | tol park will be an inspiration. Its Influence will be widely felt and
 everyone who attends should feel all
 the stronger for the performance of
 the eXacting duties of the hour.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-09-11
Protest is Nationwide

T am afraid the Washington story about the protest of the Baptists against the order withdrawing camp pastors may be looked upon as limited to Alabama said George Estes, Tor many years moderator of the Birming- ham Baptist association, which is now in session at Woodlawn, but the fact is, 1t is nationwide.
 "rhe Northern and Southern Bap- tist conventions have passed resolu- tions pledging their loyalty to the President, but requesting him to use his power to set aside the order of the third assistant Secretary of War as an abridgment of religious liberty. The Baptists are not the only ones protesting"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-09-11
All Within Draft
 Age Must Register

1f1 OMORROW is registration day
 0 and all men coming within the age provisions of the new law must register, no matter what be their physical condition or the exemptions claimed.
 Every youth from eighteen up is required to register, even if he only attains his eighteenth year on the 18th of September. And every man up to forty-six must register. There seems to be confusion in the minds of some men who have reached the age of forty-five, but are under forty six, as to their status in relation to the law, but the provisions of the act make it plain that every man in his forty sixth year is liable, that is to say every man who has not reached the age of forty-six.
 Slackers in this part of the country will be few and far between. Ala bama is patriotic to the core and it is safe to assume that the vast ma jcrity of those affected by the regis tration law will not only comply with it's terms, but do it gladly for the wipnipU If tha war
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-09-11
LUKE M,LUKA SAYS

An old maids idea of a hog is a woman who has had three husbands and who is chasing another.
 A lot of men would be wealthy if they worried as much about their own business as they do about other peo- ples business.
 Never bet a hat with a woman. If you win, you win g. If you lose, you lose 32.
 Great excitement is something dis played by a woman when she has a five-dollar bill in her pocketbook and sees a page advertisement of bar gain sale in a department store. The man who would lie and steal to get money is usually the first to sheer when a preacher leaves a church and goes to another church because he has been offered larger salary.
 Another thing we can't understand is why girl will spend two hours dolling her hair up and then put on a hat that hides everything but her face.
 If the average husband kisses his wife in the morning and kisses her again at night, he doesn't think that she has any right to bother him in the interval.
 If you are talking to a girl and she signs and tells you that she expects to die an old maid, you had better beat it. you are fooling with dynamite.
 Honestly is the best policy. There used to be some profit in being crooked, but nowadays the competition is too fierce.
 husband often has to admit that he is in the wrong. But it is different with his wife.
 As soon as we discover one who can step on wooden collar button with lieve in the, superman. But until then we will maintain that there ain't no sich animal
 And what has become of the old fashioned barkeeep who used to say: Have one on the house, boys"
 The trouble with Q wife Is that she always seems to be in need of little more coin than she can get.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-09-11
Hun Ruse Lures British Soldier to His Death

M MOTHER little story from GA France, illustrative of the way the Hun brain functions. The London Morning Post says its authenticity is "unquestioned."
 In recent operations the Fourth British army reoccupied a town after it had been evacuated by the Ger mans. While passing along one of the shell-scarred streets a live kitten was observed nailed on the door of house by its forepaws. The cries of the wretched animal and it's struggles to free itself aroused the pity of kind hearted British soldier, who ran for ward to release it. He pulled out the nails which held the animal, but just as he did so there was flash and a roar and the mutilated body of the soldier was hurled across the street.
 The Huns, when retreating, had secreted explosives behind the door and used a kitten to bait their trap, knowing that such an appeal to the humane instincts of anyone not of their own breed would have it's effect. When the soldier drew the nails he set off the charge of explosives.
 Verify, the Hun is monster of many forms. Such story as this might seem incredible, were there not substantiated incidents where human beings took the place of the kitten.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-09-11

We refuse to believe that J. Ham Lewis showed the slightest perturbation when the vessel on which he was returning to America was torpedoed It is beneath the dignity of beau sabreur to show trepi- dation in any circumstances.
 # # c A recent photograph of King Alfonso shows him wearing a broad smile. AL fonso is one of the few kings on earth just now who can look pleasant for the photographer without making an effort.
 # < # No more Fords will be manufactured until after the war. There is apparently one for every man, woman and child in America, although the vintage of some is older than that of others
 # !. # Orders have been issued against German soldiers occupying deep dugouts. Yet, there was time when Teuton thought that once he burrowed into the ground he was safe.
 F # # The militant suffs needn't flatter them selves that President Wilson has called off his Liberty Loan tour because they threatened to heckle him all along the route.
 Big Bilr' Thompson is by no means politically dead, thus proving that it is still possible for a man to get votes in America who isn't 100 per cent patriotic
 # + +
 The Kaiser and King Ferdinand of Bull garia are said to have exchanged warm words at their last meeting. We who are lined up for democracy should worry.
 x # 4
 The Tages Zeitung, which called Count Von Herting "the Prussian monarch's grave digger" unconsciously paid the count a compliment
 # < i.
 Hun cannon may batter some of those French villages into a scarcely recog- nizable mass of ruins and they will still look picturesque.
 All is quiet along the Potomac, but there is an entirely different story to tell of the situation along the Trans Siberian railroad.
 The next time an ambitious young Russia girl decides to take a shot at Lenine, she should do some target prac- tice in advance.
 Sensible advice from Admiral Sims Our fighting men abroad should not get the notion that they are doing it all.
 + < #
 While the war has played hob with baseball there is still considerable &C., tivity on the golf links.
 x # #
 The Turks are hoping for early peace with all the fervency of Mussulman yearning for new wife.
 # # #
 America Is waging a war 5000 miles away France and England can telephone to the front
 It seems the best a U-boat can do is to get a transport on the return trip.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-09-11
BEwHIsKERED ACTORS
,m the Boston Transcript.

From the Boston Transcript.
 I always had a prejudice against side whiskers, particularly on actors. And yet they all wore them. Tyrone Power, James w. Wallack, Henry Wallack, Les- ter Wallack, George Vandenhoff, Freder- ick B. Conway nice and curly). Edwin Forrest, Joseph Proctor. Wyzeman Mar shall. Charles K. Fox, w. H. Smith, F.. F. Reach, all with "siders." Mustaches were common, and a clean-shaven actor was a rarity I refer to the actors who flourished previous to about 1870. Look over any collection of photographs of ac- tors taken between 1850 and ~1s7o, and what do you find? Most of them with whiskers. I have often wondered why?
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-09-11
PARLEZ VOUS FRANCAIS?

Good heaven! Why, even the little child ren in France speak French!"-Addison. By Thomas Hood. Never go to France
 Unless you know the lingo, If you do, like me,
 You will repent. by jingo. Staring like a fool,
 And silent as a mummy, There I stood alone.
 A nation with dummy. Chaises stand for chairs,
 They christen letters Billies, They call their mothers mares,
 And all their daughters Allies; Strange it was to hear,
 I'll tell you what's a good 'un, They call their leather queer,
 And half their shoes are wooden. Signs I had to make,
 For every little notion, Limbs all going like
 A telegraph in motion. For wine I reeled about,
 To show my meaning fully. And make a pair of horns.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-09-11
Copyright 1918 by the 1sen Syndicate ADRIFT WITH THE TIMES
THE REAL THING.

He may have played hero's part, But we begin to doubt it. When with imaginative art
 He starts to write about it, And clutters up the magazines With stories of his daring, The while he moved through warlike
 scenes
 With calm, unruffled bearing. We much prefer the quiet lad Who tries to shun attention And seems to think the scapes he's had 'Tis not worth while to mention.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-09-11
cA1mEueM1@autfI

To ask for Beef and bully" Moo! I cried for milk;
 l got my sweet things snugger. When I kissed Jeannette,
 Twas understood for sugar If I wanted bread.
 My jaws I set a-going. And asked for new laid eggs. By clapping hands and growing! If wished a ride,
 IHstell you how I got it; On my stick astride,
 I made believe to trot it: Then their cash was strange, It bored me every minute, Now here's a hog to change,
 How many sowS are in it? Never go to France,
 Unless you know the lingo, If you do, like me,
 You will repent, by jingo;s Staring like a fool,
 And silent as mummy, There I stood alone.
 A nation with rummy!
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-09-11
World Series Income Decreased

Tt seems an unheard of thing that the world series should be bothercd about finances" said President Baugh of the Southern league, "for heretofore about the only difficulty they have had was in determining into how many slices the melon should be cut, and in spite of some kicking on the size of their pieces received. the slices were usually pretty thick.
 But it seems that this year on &C., count of the weather and the war that the dimension of the melon has shrunk to the size of a lemon"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-09-11
Utilization of All Ground

Tt seems rather an unusual thing but it shows that we are learning the lesson which the government asked us to learn in the way of utilizing every available plot of ground to raise foodstuffs, to see a man on High land avenue blowing up potato field of some size," said E. E. Ellis.
 "On my way into town from my home on Lakeview avenue, I pass quite a number of plots between the curb and the sidewalk which have been planted in sweet potatoes, and juds- ing from their healthy look, they will make a good crop. Germany will have a hard time starving the south out as long as it can fall back on the sweet potato"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-09-11
Bogus War Hero
 Is Soon Exposed

Sl1T1HE reins of truth are tighten
 U ing on another aviator whose thrilling air exploits have reached the copy desk of one of the best known publications in America, the Saturday Evening Post" says Plane News, published by, the avia- ton section of the American army in France. "Keen interest has been aroused in French and American avia- ton circles by the recent exposure of the tales of Harold Everett Wright, one time of the Lafayette escadrille, as printed in the Post"
 Plane News declares the stories of Wright to be considerably more fiction than fact. That versatile per son seems to have picked up an as- tonishing supply of "local color," al though he is said to have flown a total of only thirteen hours over the enemy lines and twas rejected as a pilot because of his complete unfit ness." Wright's claim to have fought with Baron Richthofen, the celebrated German flyer, is also discredited.
 The bogus war hero we have with us during all wars. Fortunately, his capacity for doing harm is not very
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-09-11

great. He may impose on gullible per sons for while but he is soon found
 out. Some of the bogus heroes are amusing and others merely contempt ible, but it is characteristic that they all try to make capital out of their
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-09-11
THE BEST ADVERTISING MEDIUM

From the Florida Times Union.
 We woundn't want to discourage the Photographers and artists, but if there were any way of checking up We would be willing to wager our stray hat against a brown velour that one live newspaper sells more War Saving Stamps and Liberty Bonds than dozen walls full of posters
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-09-11

BEGINNING THE DAY-Oh, my God, forbid that I should bar the way. Thou nrt anxious to employ me and to multiply my powers that Thou mayest employ me. Thou art anxious to shine through me. Hut I am made of clay and my dull un- willingness holds Thee back. Amen. H. NJ. E.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-09-11
IN HOTEL LOBBIES
 AND ELSEWHERE
Eastern seaboard War Industries

T went up to see my daughter who married Capt. H. Lee Konening, and who is now stationed at Philadelphia" Said R. s. Warner, "and I found the Quaker City a veritable humming hive of war industries.
 Tt is almost inconceivable how the Delaware river has been turned into great shipyards and munition facto- ries. If you want to get some idea of the magnitude upon which this country is waging and getting ready to wage war, it is necessary to go to the eastern seaboard. It makes one feel that Uncle Sam is going to mage a good job of it."
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-09-11
LOOKING FAR AHEAD

From the Cleveland Plain Dealer.
 We expect to live to see the day when people will say, Look at that quaint. old fashioned fellow-he's wear ing stiff, linen collar!
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-09-11
Member of the Associated Press.

The Age Herald is the only morning and Sunday newspaper in Birmingham carrying the Associated Press dis patches.
 The Associated Press is exclusively entitled to the use for publication Of all news dispatches credited to 1t or not otherwise credited in this paper and also the local news published herein.
 All rights of republication of special dispatches herein are also reserved.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-09-11
Splendid Team Work
 In Naval Forces

NN1HE members of the naval com
 0 mittee of the House of Repre- |sentatives, who have returned from their trip to Europe, bring cheering accounts of the situation abroad. They inquired into all the naval ac- tivities and found the conditions ex- cellent.
 Representative Padgett of Ten nessee, chairman of the committee, stresses the splendid team work" between the naval services of the United States and the allies. He tells, too, of the perfect coordination be- tween the American navy and the American army in France.
 The destroyers this country has overseas are doing great work, says Representative Farr of Pennsylvania, "but we need more of them;" also i've need more aircraft and then more"
 On the whole the committees tour was well worth while. Washington is kept thoroughly informed, of course, through the regular channels of all 
 that happens lover there," but the public feels doubly assured when congressional committee, after mak- ing close range survey, reports fa- vorably and with unrestrained en- |thusiasm.
 * *x
 been champing the bit in public because he couldn't go to France and fight the Hun, but was secretly glad of it, should remember that even if his forthy-sixth birthday comes the day after tomorrow, on September 12 he will still be forty five and must register. # * # The belief that Germany is starving to
 death is. of course, all nonsense. How ever Germans in the fatherland don't
 eat as many times a day as they used to when the Kaiser was merely getting ready to conquer the world and hadn't found out that his calculations were all
 wrong.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-09-11
EASILY HANDICAPPED.

EASILY HANDICAPPED. Calls himself a commercial bard, eh?' "Yes,' replied the literary person, with sniff of contempt.
 What sort of poet is that?" 'I dare say it's one who couldn't do full days work if he should happen to onyms.'
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-09-11
Washington bureau. POT Hibbs build

WashIhglOH DuTeaui @V' 1IIUUS Ou'11 ing,
 European bureau, Henrietta street Covent Garden. London.
 Eastern business office, World build ing, New York city; western business office, Tribune building. Chicago. The S. C. Beckwith Special Agency. agents for foreign advertising.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-09-11
BAD SORT.

There are all kinds of undesirable cit- izens."
 True. But there is one type who strikes me as being more pernicious than all the rest".
 Describe him.
 Hes the fellow who goes about with a bundle of sedtious pamphlets in one hand and a bomb in the other.''
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-09-11
WEST VIRGINIA SUBSTITUTES New York Correspondence Pittsburg Dis-

" E<SI New York Correspondence Pittsburg Dis-
 patch.
 A New Yorker who has just returned from trip through West Virginia, de- clares that the state is drug ridden since John Barleycorn was given the gate. 'In some of the mining towns that I passed through said the man from New York, "I learned that many of the stores are purchasing cough mixtures from whole sale druggists by the carload. These mixtures contain opium and other nar- cotics that are dangerous to health in large quantities. I was told these come in five and ten-gross shipments. In- quiring the reasons I was informed that since West Virginia went prohibition the miners and their families have purchased these medicines reduced them with water and drink the mixture because they have been deprived of beer. wines and whisky"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-09-11
FoREsTALLED.

"Mr Blackstone" said the close-fisteo man who wanted oget some legal infor- nation without paying a fee. T would like for you to give me little advice. just between friends. and not in the way of business, you know"
 Certainly, sir. I shall be glad to ad- wise you to the best of my ability on any subject under the sun except law
 PAUL COOK. culture and once more live in the noun tains where civilization was only skin deep. do not try to analyze or defend. but there is no denying it that the ele- mental passions of love and war grip us as nothing else can.
 l have but pictured how it gets few men hid away in the mountains. We call them feudists. but today when the Ger mans are killing our loved ones a great desire sweeps over us to kill not for the mere lust of killing. but to wipe out Kaiserism from the face of the earth
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-09-11
GERMAN LOANS

From the Cleveland Plain Dealer
 Americans are preparing for their fourth Liberty Loan campaign, resolved to make 1t the biggest. most enthusiastic achieve ment of the kind ever recorded Ger mans have passed through their eighth campaign, subscribing this time nearly a,ooo, ,ooo0oo in bonds for support of the war
 Germany's first war loan came in Sep- tember four years ago-the time first set by the Huns for the capture of Paris Each succeeding loan has been larger than it's predecessor and the number or individual subscribers have generally in- creased from one campaign to another More than six millions and half bought bonds of the eighth issue.
 Judging by the frequency of past bond campaigns, Germany will soon be com pelled to go to the people again for more money. Nearly s2S,00O 100000 have been subscribed in the eight loans. Until now. however, Germany has been able to offer it's people the prospect of victory as an encouragement for liberality. What will be the result of the next appeal, if tho allies continue their relentless hammer ing back of the Hun line toward Hun dom?
 It would, of course. be impossible for an American to say how willingly Ger mans have subscribed to the war Issues of their nation. The imperial govern ment never hesitates to apply the lash when dynastic needs require it. If Ger mans did not buy bonds voluntarily they, would doubtless be compelled to do so.
 Americans buy the bonds of their gov ernment because they recognize the jus tice of the cause which the bonds are to finance. The fourth issue, soon to be off, fered, should mark the high tide of achievement in this direction.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-09-11
HALE AND HEARTY

T cannot live without you, dear"
 He told dozen lassies. He's eighty seven, now, we hear,
 And reads without his glasses.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-09-11
sessed by the movies to catch life as It IS and preserve it for future generations.

Finally the New England maid taiis under the spell of the strong, self-reliant mountaineer who is the king in his iano' and she. after nearly bringing about his death and downfall. reverts to pioneer maiden and seizes rifle and fights py his wounded side, for she found it true as he had told her, that when one you loved was hurt the desire 70 kill would get YOU. and it sure got her.
 know the picture was genuine, for it rang no false notes and it gave me heartache to rurn my back for awhile on the city with fts conveniences and
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-09-11
CONSIDERABLY soFTENED.

CONSIDERABLY SOFTENED.
 This war is dreadful"
 ''So it is,' replied Mir. Dubwaite, but it has made better neighbor out of me-"
 How is that?"
 ''The young man who used to practice on the cornet morning, noon and night in hall bedroom across the street has been decorated for gallantry in France. If he ever comes home and wants to re- sume practicing won't say word
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-09-11
Copyright. 1918, by the
CLEVER WORK.

You can get around almost any man If you will use the right kind of flattery.' "Umph! Did you ever try that sort Of persuasion on a motorcycle policeman who was about to arrest you for speed- ing?"
 "Once, and it got results. When the fellow overhauled me said it was pity that man ho could handle his machine as well as he did wasn't winning fame and glory as a dispatch bearer for Gen. eral Pershing. That started him off. He told me how he'd tried to enlist six diff ferent times and had been rejected for physical disability. He got so indignant and I listened with so much sympathy that we shook hands at parting and he forgot all about what it was he stopped me for"
 MIGHT SMASH SOMETHING.- Young Grabcoin took up the law and dropped that"
 "Well?"
 ''Then he took up medicine and dropped that"
 What does he think of doing now?" 'Hes going into the crockery business. I hope he doesn't drop that"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-09-11

of the war.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-09-11

One never knows what 1t is that is go. ing to set ones memories going. It may be an odor, a face, or picture In this case it was the latter.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-09-11

mylhlcaI eXpIolts.