Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1918-06-07
Much Ado About Nothing
ny ROY X. MOUI.TON.
Speaking OF Nuts.

! Speaking OF Nuts.
| Tho Magic OF an Aero of Walnut Trees" Is
inc 'heme OF DISCOURSE on nuts by that learned
| expert Dr. j. H. kellogg. OF Battle Creek lie
| Is an enthusiastic advocate OF nut cu,,ure md
| he says:
Every acre OF walnut trees will produce an
| nually food equal to:
| Fourteen thousand pounds of red bass Ca
| shipload).
| Three thousand pounds beef five steers,
| Seven thousand five hundred pounds O,
| chicken broilers
| Fifteen thousand pounds Holsters
Ten thousand pounds oysters
| Five thousand dozen eggs.
| -Four thousand quarts milk
Thirteen sheep.
Two hundred thousand frogs"
Now just sit down and figure that mt and
see what nuts will do, and calculate what
100000 acres of nuts would produce
Let us hear from that other great exponent
| OF nut culture. tie warden of Matteawan
The Oldest man In America lives in Trov. N
y. He can remember when turkeys were Is
cents a pound.
The bray is to be removed from the arnv
mule, thus essening the horrors of war about
so per cent
Looking at gallant little Belgium, Russia must
feel very proud of herself
California professor says whalemeat Is more
digestible than chicken. Yes but who wants to
keep flock OF whales in the back yard?
One thousand dentists are wanted in the
United States Army. Take all of EN- See II
We
Professor Goosebone.s Forecast for summer
Professor Goosebone the eminent past pres-
ent and futurer also lost umbrellas recovered
who won fame by predicting the Messina earth
quake the morning after it happened and added
nv, tim
Josef would not reach liz years OF age has
issued the following forecast for the coming
summer months, which may be taken as fairly
accurate:
commodities during the summer. including fruit
can rubbers, lead pencil sharpeners. snowshoes
violin strings. beefsteak. greaseless face cream
and buttonhooks. on account OF the war
There will be continued troubles in Europe
and a good many Americans will sail eastward
across the Atlantic. Indications point to the
fact that the fight will not be over before
July 4.
been failure.
Several Congressman will run fo- Office sEain
this fall.
ut is indicated that money will be hard to
get during this summer but on the other hand
it will be spend.
There will be good crop OF Eooseberries
because nobody likes them"
Teuton!c
casualty list No Hohenzollerns, Hapsburgs
Hindenburgs or anything like that
The Prince of Wales is going to be married
One war at time evidently isn't enough for
that boy.
See Pershing's boys don't hesitate about cut
ting the Germans dead Little society etiquette
in this war
81 Day.
Oh. the farmhands they are scarce
In Kansas.
The hired men nix
In Kansas.
And It's seven bucks day
That the farmers have to pay
Chance for actors to make hay
In Kansas.
What will become OF the actors this summer?
| The annual question. What becomes OF them
every summer? Nothing.
United States Marine Corps advertising for
horseshoers. What? Are they the celebrated
horse marines?
Joe Henchel's chickens positively refuse to
recognize the set-the- clock head a hour move
ment.-Greenpoint Home News
And lot Of other chickens don't recorniz.
II. either