The Washington herald., 1918-06-28
me Girls Go .wrs.g.

There are shoppers and shop
pers."
The last named do not shop: they
swipe. They leave their conscience
home under the bed when they so
downtown.
Nellie johnson and josephine
Smith met downtown Wednesday af-
tsrnoon.
Let's 90 shopping" suggested
Nellie. : "Awright," said Josephine.
"but we amt got any money"
THAT doesn't make no differ BIT
tance." explained Nellie. "jes watch
me-
Josephine watched and learned q
few tricks In shoplifting.
The pair operated in the SC and
10c stores.
They swiped perfumery. rubber
heels. soap. taicum powder. stock
ings, carpet tacks and lunch paper.
Policeman w. r. Burke spotted
them and although In his uniform.
he watched them closely and later
arrested them.
Lots Of other things. such as silk
stockings. lace. etc. were found In
their rooms. It all goes to show
that they had been shopping be-
fore. ~
However. the girls confessed their
sins. They didn't try to ib their
way out
The court took this into consider
alton In sentencing them. The girls
got four months each
Never More FOR Livermere.
Bootleg whisky may have been re.
sponsibie for Bill Livermore's tooth
ache, for all we know.
Bill was proving along Pennsyl-
vania avenue Wednesday night.
Someone sneaked up behind him and
gave him a drink.
Several mysterious persons did this.
and pretty soon Bill was loaded like
a tramp steamer bound for the war
zone.
He reeled all over the street. He
kept one hand up to his face. He
was groaning. 81 wisht the Kaiser
had this dam toothache." he remark
ed. as he leaned up against a plate
glass window,
Bill leaned a little too hard against
the window and smashed 1t into
pieces.
A man looked out of a window
upstairs above the window.
Hey, what's coming off?' he de-
manded, looking daggers at Bill
Nothin' comm on" gurgied Bill.
IT'S all comm In. fell agin yore
window. Come down and pick me
up"
Policeman Roamer came along and
took a slant at things and then took
charge of Bill.
There was no evidence that Bin
smashed the window out of pure Gus
sedness. 1t was merely carelessness.
Therefore the court only fined him
s50-or sixty days.
Aw-slush!
Henry willet has a young and at
iractive daughter.
The boys buzz around her like bees
cs,cr honey. And this buzzing has
h"ea getting on Henry's nerves.
fonday night Louis Ralston called
80 Eta, the daughter, and he was in
Vied to have supper.
There was no sugar on the table for
70 iced tea. Henry apologized to his
Suest and explained why he didn't
have any.
oh. dat's an right. Mister iIenery."
said Louis: you darter am sweet
enough widout de sugar" Henry was
shocked.
Turning to Eta, Louis kissed her.
Honey" he said. I'VE doan need no
sugar. do we? 70 am sweet enuf 70
me-"
"well." said Henry when he found
his voice, ''of all de scandalous car
ryin's on dis am de limit
"Yo wux young yohself once, wuzn't
yo?" asked Minnie, Henry.s wife, who
suddenly found her voice.
Dammit, woman" snapped Henry.
"shet up. All doan wanna hear
word outa nobuddy."
With that he showed Louis away
from the table and slapped Minnie in
the mouth. "Yo all kin go whar dey
don't drink iced tea" said Henry rs
he got up and went out.
He was arrested. He pleaded guilty
to assaulting his wife and paid a fine
Of so. The story above Is drawn from
his wife's testimony.
Poor But Cruel
ledge, All am a poah man." re-
marked Isaac Hilton.
I'VE are all poor people" said
the court. 'T am poor myself"
"Ah knows dat, Jedge," said Isaac,
but All is poah twice in de same
place. Nah wife ticks all nah
money en- woan gimme any of it,"
rs that any reason for you to
beat herr asked the court.