davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-03-31

district agricultural schools and experi- hear them talk of what they were doing and trying to do to prepare young men and young women for practical home makers. And then the principals of the county high schools are as fine a bunch of level-headed educators as can be found anywhere. know personally the work being done by many of them, and it is worth while in every way.
 
 But do not overlook the superintend- ents of the city schools. just take tho case of pr. J. H. Phillips. He has got mans size job and has made the public schools of Birmingham known and re- spected throughout the country. Many of the others are making good. Then come the county superintendents. a mighty important body of men, They most of them are filters.
 got great pleasure out of greeting my teacher friends from all over the state, and I got the idea that tho Ala pama Educatlonal association Is a for ward looking body and means to keep step with the best there is in the land, and while not underwriting the cultural studies, yet by the nature of the demands made upon us all to be producers, to see to it as never before that every boy and girl youth and maiden, young man or young woman who passed through the schools of the state shall be fitted not only to make living for themselves, but be able to care for others, and inl this way to do their part in helping Uncle Sam to win the war
 Birmingham was proud to have them as her guests and hopes that they will come back next year 5000 strong to cele- brate the states centennial in a fitting way. It could be made a great home coming for all who have ever taught ir
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-03-31

By FRANK WILLIS BARNETT

By FRANK WILLIS BARNETT policies of the Alabama Educational as- sociation.
 the schools of Alabama.
 General regret was expressed that Dr.
 Nicholas Murray Butler was held in New
 York by the war activities in which he is proving to be such a valuable servant to the government but the presence of
 a number of other distinguished educa- tors from out of the state made up in a degree for his absence.
 The big guns in the state were on hand to furnish all the educational thunder
 needed Drs. Denny and Thach, while
 much In evidence in the outside gather ings, took minor parts if any on the programme, but all the same their in fluence was felt, and 1t was a comfort to know that we had two such splendid
 gentlemen to head our great schools at
 Tuscaloosa and at Auburn.
 l was glad to see that the heads of
 our state normals were on hand. l
 learned to appreciate both the men and their work some while back, when 1 visited number of them. I got to greet Drs. Willingham, Shackelford, Brock
 and Daugette. and was pleased to hear them say that in spite of war conditions their schools were we'll attended. I fear
 that too few realize just what good work
 is being done by the nornals. I came near overlooking President
 Palmer and the Alabama Girls Techni- ! cal institute at Montevallo. I have had
 great respect for him and a high re- gard for the institution ever since my visit to it last year with Mrs. Mathis. have been back since and the more 1 see of it the prouder am that we have such a valuable training place in the 1 state for our young women.
 l met some of the men in charge of the
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-03-31
Increase Food and
 Feedstuff Crops

ACCOMPLISHMENTS the urgent N N appeals of the food administfa- ton for largely increased crops, both field and garden, the food slogan should be sounded day after day from now until seeding time is past.
 The south should have fed itself in other years. Now it is imperative. If Alabama fails to feed itself this year it will suffer. But it will not fail in that respect. In addition to feeding itself, Alabama is expected to have a surplus to ship to less favored sec tions.
 There must be no relaxing of inter- est in the all-important crop diversifi- cation movement. Many of the farm-
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-03-31
*
New President of
 Alabama Educators

THE Alabama Educational asso- 0 citation, which closed it's thirty seventh annual convention here yes terday, brought together the largest number of teachers and principals ever assembled in the history of the organization. While patriotism was an absorbing theme, practical peda- gogy received the usual share of at tention and the proceedings were fruitful of good that will be of a far reaching character.
 Much consideration was given to the "better speech" movement and it is noteworthy fact that in most of the graded schools pupils are show ing marked eagerness to improve both their oral and written English
 The election of Miss Cora Pearson to the presidency of the association was not only fitting recognition of the ability of one of Alabama's fore most educators, but it stressed a pro- gressive policy that means much for the future of the public school sys- tenn.
 She is the first woman to be hon pred with the executive leadership of the association As a member of the faculty fthe state normal school at Florence her constructive work is widely known, and her achievement as a member of the articulation com mittee of the Alabama English asso- citation entities her to the especial thanks of all who appreciate the value of accuracy of expression and con- vincing style in writing or speaking
 If too little has been done in Eng lish courses new departure is now in full swing that should in time make up for any deficiency in the past.
 Educators in general will be ready to cooperate cordially with Miss Pear son, and everybody will wish her well.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-03-31
LUKIE LUKE SAYS

Do not argue with your wife-she doesn't give a hang about parliamentary law. And do not fight with your wife she doesn't give boot about Marquis of Quensbery rules.
 It is none of our business. But the man who marries a woman who has been divorced five times must be mighty fond of secondhand goods.
 If the antediluvian weather forecasters you can't blame those old cave men for giving Noah the laugh when the latter predicted the flood.
 This is funny world. You are prais-
 ing man when you say that he is level- headed, and you are knocking him when you say that he is flat t-headed.
 The man who writes all of his love letters on postal cards is never sued for breach of promise A hobo is a great student of human nature. And when a hobo is hungry and sees doormat with 'Welcome on it in front of house he goes to some other house.
 The manners of some girls, like their complexions. are put on for the occa- sion.
 Some men cant understand how an art ist who has somi-nude female model posiliS lOr Hiin ever AidAaSoS to 6Se any
 work done.
 What has become of the ld-fashioned youth who used to write, Roses are red,
 violets are blue," in a girls autograph album?
 Many girl who marries because she doesn't like to spend her evenings alone
 keeps right on spending them alone. l The Investigators now announce that l 70 per cent of our women are knock | kneed This may or may not be true, but what we want to know is who does the Investigating, and why the Hek
 Luke can't get on the einvestigating com mittee.
 | What has become of the man who used to mourn by wearing yard of crepe on his derby hat? An engagement ring doesn't attract half as much attention when 1t appeals on girls finger as 1t does when it dis appears from girls finger. l A woman hunts for bargains in other things. But when she goes shopping foI
 her spring hat she wants something ex- l pensive.
 When a mans wife calls him up and | tells him that she has something she wants to talk to him about he is pug
 zled because she usually talks to him about the things she hasn't got. l specialist announces that he knows how to make red noses white. But, shux, Inc has nothing on us. We know how tc
 make noses red.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-03-31

the first few shots it caused no more sensation in Paris than the chance drop-l ping of splash of bird-lime from some sparrow overhead that gun, so the offi- cial German announcement informs tnel world, keeps on firing. No doubt it willy keep on firing until the crack of doom-E or rather until the crack of the gun; for! such gun cannot last long.
 Some day the victorious allies ought toA look up that gun, or whatever may bs8 left of it. It would make rare contrI-l button to a, museum of war reIics .an5 interesting memorial of the TeutoncH brain, which, outside the craniums of theI German general staff, perhaps cannotS be better studied than in the activitiesa of the .blue-bottle fly which, conceivingl the idea that the one desideratum is to} get out of doors and that the one way} to get out of doors is to buzz and butts its way through an ;mpenetrable win-s
 dow pane "continues," as a GernanG
 official announcement might say, ltss efforts to buzz and butt it's Teutonicl brain through the window pane until i'd drops into Nirvana.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-03-31
From the Louisville Courier-J Journal.

From the Louisville Courier-Journal.
 HHNR HE continued the lombard
 w ment of the fortress of
 v Paris" was an official Ger man announcement yesterday.
 No doubt true-at least that they con tinued plunking away with that long range gun which at first caused so much mystifcation and speculation But the Parisians didn't mind it yesterday. They were not enough interested in the con tinued 'bombardment' to make any ref erence to 1t In the news of the day
 And so the 70-mile bombardment of Paris takes it's place in the annals or German stolidity and stupidity which em- balm the feats of the continuous bonn bardment of the women and children of London and the continuous policy of .frightfulness' against noncombatants wherever they may be reached.
 The brains which are responsible for the theory of German 'kultur" conceived the theory that England might be un- nerved and stampeded by dropping bombs from the air on the women and children, and although it was quickly proved that
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-03-31

It's hard to realize the full importance of the recent meetings of the Alabama Educational association, for 1t brought into conference hundreds of the picked men and women from all parts of the state
 The lobby of the Tutwiler for three days was miniature Alabama as all of the 67 counties were represented. It was also sounding board of state wide gossip, but I was glad to find that education, farming, and business, and war drowned the faint voices of a few professional politicians who were mingling in the various groups.
 have been going over the state pretty freely In the past month or so, and I haven't found anyone outside of the of- ficeseekers excited as yet about the com ing election, either as to the men or the issues, but after the April meeting scheduled in Montgomery on the 4th of April it may be possible to create a breeze of interest
 It's good sign that winning the war is uppermost in the minds of the peo- pie when 25o0 leaders of thought can come together in public for discussion with gubernatorial election only few months away and yet practically ignore it in their overwhelming disire to mobil- ize their forces in the service of their state and nation
 It was, however, a field day for the women. The election of Miss Cora Pear son of Florence as president, and of Mrs D. A. Echols of Birmingham as sec ond vice president, evidences the fact that after years of devoted and untiring service the men are anxious to honor their sisters by giving them fuller rec ognition in the molding and shaping the
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-03-31
THE EVENING STAR

By Thomas Campbell Star that bringest home the bee. And sett'st the weary laborer free. If any star shed peace, 'tis thou,
 That send'st it from above, Appearing when heavensc breath ant
 brow
 Are sweet as hers we love. Come to the luxuriant skies. Whilst the landscapes odors rise, M Whilst far-off lowing herds are heard
 And songs when toll is done, From cottages whose smoke uhstirre'
 Curls yellow in the sun. Star of loves soft interviews. Parted lovers of the muse; Their remembrancer in heaven
 Of thrilling vows thou art Too delicious to be riven
 By absence from the heart.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-03-31

Amiable Child" The touching inscripl tion has aroused much curiosity as tc| the unrecorded name of the victim of an| untimely fate. A New York city papei] says that the child was the son of Georgd Pollock, who owned a tract of land in this section in 1797. While this s'amia ble child'' was on a fishing excursion with his father at a place called Fish ing Rock,' a short distance out in the! river, he fell overheard and was drownedl The father wrote, in conveying to and other person the land where the monui ment stands: "The surrounding ground, will fall into the hands of know nod whom. whose prejudices or better tastsl may remove the monument and lay tha
 enclosure open. You will confer a pecuA liar and interesting favor upon me by) allowing me to convey the enclosure te3 you **s keeping it, however. always
 enclosed and sacred"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-03-31

was running to form. The Bush Termi- nal company holds property valued at s2o,0oo,0o0 for the Russian government, but refused to certify how much of 1t belongs to MT. Romanoff. The only re- course was to enter suit, secure judg- ment, enter it, and have thel Bush com pany ordered to specify the property m its hands owned by the former Czar, which he doubtless knows nothing about He might be pleased to know he has been sued for not paying his debts like a regular man.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-03-31
Experts Explain The Mystery Gun"

e7F HE world was amazed when the
 ~ Germans began to lombard Paris at distance of more than seventy miles. Yet, ordnance ex- perts tell us that the great gun, with which it was hoped to strike terror into the hearts of Parisians and which. in that purpose has proved miser- able failure, represents merely the logical development of well known principles.
 J. Bernard Walker, editor of the Scientific American, says: "Any na- tion that thought it worth while could have built 91a-inch gun with range of seventy miles; but all mill tary men except those of the German breed have realized that they have no use for a gun of super-range. The German breed had use for such gun IS part of it's programme of fright fulness hence this dropping of un- aimed shells into the city of Paris"
 Mr. Walker thinks the new gun, which was turned out at the Krupp works, according to the Kaiser, who expresses his pious gratitude to the heads of the Krupp concern, has an elevation of about 431s degrees and is immovabIe, except in the reeoil. It
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-03-31
coLoNEL.s INMosT THOUGHT

From the Nashville Banner.
 Down deep in his heart-though ne never intends to reveal it--there is the certainty that the intrepid colonel knows that, had he, instead of IIais. been in command the slaughter of Germans would have been far greater and the all lies would now be rushing on to Berlin.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-03-31
JUNGLE JOE. EXPLAINS

Washington.-Unc Joe Cannon Is S' but mentally spry The subject of the ..slicker" came up today. and Uncle Joe was asked why so many of the army re- serve officers in Washington wore spurs
 "The reason is simple" he said. Tt is to keep their feet from sliding off the desks"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-03-31
PREPARING FOR THE WORST

From the Arkansaw Gazette.
 Another indication that the situatior5 has taken decided change for the betT ter-the German newspapers already
 have started to framing up their alibis3
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-03-31

cannot be aimed because of its great length, requiring either a stiff steel truss or solid concrete for support, to prevent it from bending under it's own weight. The shells dropped on Paris have fallen within comparatively narrow radius.
 Hudson Maxim, distinguished American inventor, also holds that there is nothing mysterious in the construction of the new gun. He es- inmates its total length at 100 feet; caliber, 20 inches; powder chamber, 30 feet; diameter of powder chamber, 27 inches; diameter of projectile, 9 inches; length of projectile, 27 inches. If the Germans had one of these weapons at Ostend, by slightly in creasing the range, they could bom- bard London, just as they are now bombarding Paris.
 Shooting seventy miles merely means burning sufficient amount of powder, at sufficiently high pres sure, in sufficiently long gun" A cannon of this sort is not practicable because it soon wears out and it is not mobile. As a weapon of fright fitness" it has it's uses. For military ,,,,,,o-o, ;+ Sc x,,or+L1acc
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-03-31
TO GAN AMIABLE CHILD.

From the Outlook
 small monument reminiscent of old time New York is often noted on River side Drive. near that somber memorial. Grants tomb. The little stone is in scribed: Erected to the Memory of An
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-03-31

Qh01sllldS tNB V AiCC0OAli 4ACSAg And stem the Hun advance; Although the wide seas intervene, Our hearts are with you, France.
 IN FOR IT. Was the wedding success in every respect?p
 Tn most particulars. However, some of the guests thought the brides mother cried more than was really necessary "Yes?'
 You see. the young couple will make their home with her. "Umph The old lady wasn't shedding any idle tears"
 THEN SHE GOT MAD. "John," said Mrs. Dubwaite, T see where another man has been asphyxiated in his garage"
 Well, my dear?' "The next time you have any work to do on our car I'll insist on going with you'
 Its kind of you to be willing to dle with me, my love, but who will look after the children?''
 PRACTICAL WORK. Let poets sing of voflets And fair bucolic scenes; I have no time for triolets- I'm raising turnip greens.
 PASSING OUT. He's joined the departing procession, His day is OCT, The chap whose favorite expression Was, Just one more''
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-03-31
Monday Last Day
 For Tax Returns

1D)ERSONS liable for income tax U who have failed to make their returns to the internal revenue office have only one more day in which to comply with the government regula- tions.
 Returns not made by Monday will subject the delinquent to 50 per cent increase on the amount of tax as- sessed and fine of from $10 to 5000.
 The treasury department has an |nounced it's intention of prosecuting |relentlessly all slackers. No one will be allowed to escape. The rate of tax lis small and the department has been liberal in exemptions for men of fam lily and unmarried men with relatives dependent upon them.
 A vast sum of money is needed in the conduct of the war and he or she who would try to evade the. income tax law is lacking in every sentiment of patriotism. Let there be no slack CTS hereabouts.
 The tax does not have to be paid until June 15, but in view of the gov ernment's needs, it will be an accom- modation to Uncle Sam if the final date for paying is anticipated. Many persons and corporations have already given evidence of their patriotism by paying in advance. And the rule from now on should be to pay before June,. wherever it can be done without serious inconvenience to those liable.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-03-31

 cultivate their lands intensively. Those who have not been progressive must become so.
 If every tiller of the soil does his best 1918 will not only be Alabama's banner year but in helping to feed the allies it will be performing service for humanity and democracy that cannot be overestimated.
 With everybody's shoulder to the wheel the result of thN years agri- cultural activities will be nothing short of a revelation.
 < % x
 It was rather unkind of a pr. Some body or other to charge Anna Held and Gertrude Hoffman with corrupting the public's morals. Anna has been ser time she has made her eyes behave.
 # 4. #
 Birmingham lady whose grandmother met Lafayette, says she was impressed by the marquis large ears. Large ears usually denote a large heart You sell dom see a man with that kind of ears who robs widows and orphans.
 < < #
 The fact that Dr. Cook passed through Birmingham several times without being interviewed is not surprising Dr. Cook dispensed with his ballyhoo man long ago.
 What has become of the old-fash- toned statesman who could stand 10 feet away and expectorate tobacco juice into a cuspidor without missing? ~
 # * x
 Some of these days President Wilson is going to be in great hurry and forget to start one of his communications with the phrase, May I not?"
 4. # #
 Hardly day passes that one or more student flyers don't lose their lives by accident. They deserve place on the roll of honor. H5 A British officer has warned New Workers to be prepared for an air raid. That's bringing the war home to us with a vengeance.
 Has anybody in this country any ob- jections to General Foch's winning all the glory of turning the Hun offensive into rout? The proposal to have an eggless Eas- ter was received calmly. Nobody has ever had nerve enough to suggest hat less Easter. Representative Cox says Congress fid- dies while the world burns The next question is: Shall we build fire under Congress?' # # # Old Irving Cobb is eminently correct. There won't be any peace in this world until the mania is knocked out of Ger mania.
 * # # That German soldier who was captured by Americans and wanted to go back and get his brother was an unselfish fel- low. S American "hello'' girls have arrived in France. When they say the lines bus, lover there" they'll probably mean it x * x The suspension of meatless days means nothing in particular to the dyspeptic Iwho subsists on crackers and milk. :* * # | That new gun of the Germans has made good by dropping shell on church full of people in Paris. |
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-03-31
A pIG pRoyIsO :

From the Louisville Courier-Journal.
 "God willing, we shall overcome the enemy in the vest" says General von Hinderburg. Quite so In other words. it will be dry under foot if it doesn't rain.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-03-31
ADRIFT WITH THE TIMES

 RIMEs OF THE TIMES. Each time a ship
 Glides to the sea We've struck a blow
 For liberty.
 Birmingham Age-Herald And every time
 We gaff a Hun You bet we've struck Another one.
 Macon Telegraph. And every time We spare a spy We let chance
 To strike pass by.
 --Memphis Commercial-AppeaL And every time
 We strike a blow We help to lay
 The Kaiser low
 Jackson clarion-Ledger. CONTEMPTIBLE TRICK. "Confound it. believe that cook has broken another plate" Shall I remonstrate with lher?u demonstrating won't do any good.  She has 8 brother in General Haig's army, has she not?9 Yes sF Suppose you tell her that every time she breaks a piece of china she's aiding the Kaiser?"
 MISSED THE POINT. My doctor advised me to take tong rest" That was good advice, wasn't it?'' Yes, but I fear he has no sense. of humor. When asked him, What on?' he solemnly replied, "A houseboat' :"
 PAUL COOK.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-03-31
Lntchstring On Outside

In a letter to a member of The Age Herald staff John D. Rather, president of the Chamber of Commerce of Tus- cumbia, writes:
 4 Tt was 8 genuine pleasure to have the Chamber or Commerce of Birming- ham and press representatives with us on Tuesday, and we hope all enjoyed the occasion as much as we did. You can rest assured of a cordial welcome at any time to any of you who will come to see us.''
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-03-31
SWAPPING IT BACK.

Reuben, Reuben, I've been thinking How our cause it would promote, If all women shc,Gd be moving To the states where they can vote.
 -E. F. s. Rachel, I am almost certain If the women wish to go Where their votes will all be counted, I'll be the last to say them no.
 -Tennyson J. Daft. Reuben, once again I'm thinking You'd not stop for idle talk If the women should be moving You'd go, too, if you had to walk. Roswell, N. M. III. F. K. Reuben, Reuben, I've been thinking When the women get the vote, If they stuff the ballot boxes That will be a helva note.