The Washington herald., 1918-06-05
TOO MUCH FAMILY
BY DOROTHY DIX,
THE WORLDS HIGHEST PAID WOMAN WRITER


The fatal human triangle does not
really consist of the husband, the
wife and the other man or woman.
as. novelists and dramatists have led
US to believe. It consists Of the hus-
band. the wife and the in-laws.
When all Il said not many men and
women are gay deceivers-faithless to
their marriage vows. Even the ann
ity II a somewhat rare, bird whose
habitat is in the places Of the rich.
and who seldom fiutters around the
ordinary home. But in-laws. like the
poor, are always with US. and few
there be who escape them. They are
an ever present danger and menace
to every new household that Is start
ed.
This danger Is all the greater be-
cause 1t is a secret. insidious. even an
unintentional one. that Ii neither
perceived nor planned until the dam
age has been done. and 1t Is too late
to avoid the catastrophe. Indeed. the
harm done is inspired by affection and
that Is what makes 1t SO deadly, FOR
we can cope with malice and fight
our enemies. but we are helpless and
weaponless before those We love ana
who love US. although they slay US
through misdirected kindness.
That is what makes the in-law prob
lem the most insoluble and acute
problem of life. If our in-laws were
wicked or disreputable, nefarious. de-
signing people, plotting against our
peace and happiness. We would know
how to deal with them. There would
be jails, stone walls and triple bar
red doors for them but they are not
wicked people.
On the contrary, they are the salt
of the earth. honorable. kindly. shin
ing examples in the community In
which they live. They wouldn't
knowingly do US any harm for the
world, and as for being engaged In
any deep, dark lot to wreck our fire.
sides and ruin our lives. they'd be in
capable of such a thing.
Nevertheless and notwithstanding.
the first quarrel that every young
couple has is over his or her own
people. and the last, before one or
the other starts for Reno. Is on the
same subject. In-laws, according to
divorce lawyers, are practically at the
bottom OF nearly every divorce. They
drive men to drink and drown women
in tears. and are such potent
source of disCord that about the only
safe person to marry is a founding
who was reared in an orphan asy-
lum.
OF course the blame for this rests
mainly with the young. Every youth
and maiden who enter into marriage
do SO with a chip on their shoulders
that they dare the relatives of the
party Of the other part to knock of
They are looking for offense. and
they find it, in the most innocent acts
and words.
Other women may make suggestions
to an inexperienced young bride. and
she receives them with mGeknCss and
thankfulness. but she ruffles UP ike
wet hcn IL her mOther-in-law dares
to hand her out the slightest mint
about the best way to do thing
Other people may advise the young
husband. and he takes 1t in the spirit
IN which 1t was meant, but let any of
mis- wife's people dare to pipe. and he's
up in arms for fear they are trying
to boss him.
What there is in the marriage serv-
ice that should cause his wite's family
to become anathema to a man and
make the woman hate her HUSBANDS S
people, sight unseen. nobody knows.
1t merely just generally happens that
way in this illogical old world of ours.
There are exceptions OF course to
the rule. There are cases in which
the in-laws establish a spiritual kin
ship that is ueerer and tenderer ths n
any tie Of blood, hut, for the most
part. even good people find that there
is something in the in-law relation