El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1918-04-13
Old WinecaSR
GUeS Seat
To Gas Tank
Prince Carbonic Publishes
Up Discarded Crown of
Old Booze King.
By THOMAS SHEPHERD.


THE king is deadi Long live the
L kingl Old Winecask the ten mill
lionth. so long monarch Of the thirsty,
with all his glorious future behind
him. is fleeing TO other parts, and the
erstwhile pretender. Carbonic tank.
comes to the throne and is even now
having the dented old crown straight
ened and polished against the day Of
his coronation. How viii the con-
vivial subjects Of the tipsy. old de-
posed ruler accept the new dispense
ton? VIII they submit wholly and
cheerfully, or will they secretly har-
Dor agents Of the old Winecask. who
shall be ever fomenting conspiracy
and eabal TO reseat the former SOW
ereign?
Tuesday they'll begin changing ma
hogany for marble and lining VI a
row Of little round topped stools in
front Of the ba-counter! The Lions
Den" where they sold soda and hook,
VIII change its sign to, Daniel Horst
heimer, Soda and Sweets. Candy With
Sugar In It." Mikes Place" win be-
come Miguel O'Halloran- Light
Lunches and Confectionery" the first
name being a concession 10 the Span
ish trade, while The Bloody Bucket"
viii blossom out, accompanied by a
delicate OdOr Of azurea, as -Teacup
Inn. HaViland used Exclusively"
But there viii be points Of similarity
between old and new. Where was
thirst parlor viii be a candy kitchen;
and the tap room will still be a good
place for knocking" when the right
two meet over their reducing drink
OF citric acid
What About the PaintinEss
Well, thereu be a few places ITO
market, but the space viii be alb
sOrbed and so viii the glassware
much Of It. probably, by German
agents for use in canning factories.
Lemon peel is a by product and
needn't be considered. but without
suggesting decentralization for the
man who grows cloves, 1t strikes me
that the greatest and most serious
problem is that Of the people thrown
out Of employment
Bartenders and saloon ownersZ
WhT, my dear man, don't you realize
that for every bartender who has to
look for work there viii be at least
three women who viii lose their
places. Those luxurious ladies'" I
mean. who hang on the walls Of every
saloon and. in their gilt frames, are
forever coyly dipping too pink toe
into a marble pool or doing their hair
while they take the air bath so highly
recommended by Benjamin Franklin
Then there's that other lady" whose
artist with another appointment in
half hour, arrived most announcement
" Just as she was getting out Of bed
You can't blame her-these artists
are temDeramental and must be all
lowed to work when they're in the
mood
odds Against Chrome Girls
What is TO be done with these2
7 submit that they wouldn't go at ali
too much of life. these girls from
over the bar. Though they don't
bother with dressmaking. they know
a lot about the seamy side. They
have witnessed a thousand reels OF
that lurching drama, Ten Tights IN
a Barr0om." But it's all from OBJ
serTa ton, not from experience. Re
member first that these girls are
good. they have always held them
selves high-anywher from eight 10
ten feet-and have never fallen ex-
cept on the very rare occasions when
a bullet cut the string that held them
on the wall
Then remember that they for years
most Of them all their lives, been cut
off from association with their
equals among their own sex, and you
readily see that Il wouldn't do TO
drop them suddenly into the frivo-
lOus and critical atmosphere Of q soda
fountain. II would be safer over
fountain, no doubt; there would not
be the same danger Of being scratched
by splintered glass or getting a
shower from the settler bottle, that
Drop and mainstay Of the humOrOusly
inclined "souse" But the odds would
be all against the chrome girls in
sweets shop; there are too many more
artiEtica llv painted ones there