The Washington herald., 1918-02-21

Special Correspondent Of The Washington Herald
New York, Feb. 2-LOne hundred
pounds OF coal can thank Herbert
Brown and Charles Hobson that it
still is receiving admiring glances in
State street, Brooklyn, instead Of be-
ing a few cans of ashes on the way
to the dump, as it would be by now IL
its gallent defenders had not frus-
trated a bold attempt to kidnap and
burn 1t to death the other morning.
Herbert and Charles collected an as
sortment of cuts and bruises that eX-
hausted the court plaster and arnica
reserve in Brooklyn. But they have
the satisfaction of knowing that the
two men who inflicted their hurts are
now wondering which of the prison
baseball teams they will be roofing
for next summer.
Herbert and Charles are employees of
a garage at a State street address.
The coal, in a close fitting sack, was
in the cellar recuperating from a
rough voyage across the Hudson.
Whenever the employees OF the gar
age performed any special services
they were allowed to enter the eel
lar and gaze on the treasure. Then
early one morning the sound Of coal
protesting as it was being dragged
across the floor convinced Herbert
and Charles that all was not as it
should be-
Ignoring the fact that the safe was
open and that all sorts of cars were
lying around loose. Herbert and
Charles rushed from the garage in
time 20 see two gem collectors drag
kA 4 H., ln.E
fist fight followed and Herbert and
Charles began TO study astronomy
for a few seconds until a policeman
arrived and the day and the coal
were saved.
collectors said: We shouldn't have
been so hoggish. We should have
been satisfied with one piece of coal. &"
There has been found in New York
man who did not know the war was
going on. He is a BOwery derelict
and admitted that he had been too
busy drinking to read the papers for
three years. Asked his occupation, he
said he was an advertising man. 81
carry poster boards on me, front and
back ne explained.
The undertakers of New York State
attired in the conventional black
broadcloth and diamonds-gathered at
the McAlpin this week to stop right
where they are and talk it over. They
discussed business to the tune of
Hearts and Flowers" interpolated
with the new ditty Il Don't Want 10
Get Well"
one feature OF the meeting which
f; lowered above every other in the in
terest was the discussion Of the cof-
fin situation. It has reached a stage
where a snappy Ss-note coffin is un-
obtainable at any price.
The mahogany, which formerly gave
dignity and polish to q major league
funeral. has been seized for the man
ufacture of aerOplanes. ANY under
taker knows that to attempt a Class
A funeral with a cloth coffin is Moth
ing short of lauGhable.
Briefly, the cost Of living may be in
tolerable but the cost of snuffinc IL out
is higher than persons in moderate
circumstances can approach. The un-
dertakers of New York merely ask
a little patience on the part Of those
who have set. their minds on goin-
west.
Blue mourning is the latest seen on
Fifth avenue. II does not mean death
lit means divorce. Said a blue
mourner: "Blue is the comDronise
color. 1 have lost my husband. ] dc
! not dislike him, but / had to divorce
him. The mourning Is half for him
and half for the memories. We were
brought up together. He got rich toe
fast in New York. He began to gu
the pace. He left me at home while
he played the grills and the white
lights He is married again--to his
/ stenographer.''
On the authority of experts repre-
1 senting forty-three leading life iusur
ance companies It appears that 9
spinster lives longer than a married
| woman Business women live longts