davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-10-07
LIKE M,LUKE SAYS

This is hard world. When a man fails in business and is trying to fight off the blue devils of despair, all he hears is: "Ill bet he soaked a good wad for himself and is letting his cred- itors run for Sweeney
 The reason married man likes to get out at night is because when his wife's photograph isn't going her chin |ograph is.
 You know how other people bore you and get you sore when they call on you when you are busy, but you never think of this when you call on some other man when he is busy.
 A clever girl is kept busy studying men,, pretty girl keeps men busy studying her.
 Those who cause others to suffer must suffer themselves. Thus, when you tell a man one of your jokes, he will make you listen to one of his. The reason why a man can be so good natured when some other woman is out with him is because he can be so grouchy when his wife is out with him.
 There may not be dog heaven. But a real dogs idea of a dog hell~is to be a poodle and have to wear pink rib- bon and have to answer to the name of 'Cutle.
 After a girl gets married she discov- CTS that it takes heap more to make her happy than she thought it would.
 And the reason why mother thinks that her son is as innocent as the day he was born is because nobody else does.
 We don't know why q girl is afraid of mouse. But we do know that she ie,,r f,.,i r,f han a,1co iS xnyp. mi v,ey q mustache.
 Every time we hear man knocking the rich and bla bbing that the wealthy think more of money than they do of anything else, we know that he is going to touch us for two bits before we get away from him. The only thing in common between patriotism and politics Is that they both begin with g ?
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-10-07
FROSTED c.nEs BANNED

From the Washington Star.
 Food Administrator Hoover has or dered the bakers to stop baking iced cakes and requests housewives to do the same Sugar is scarce, and there is no prospect of an early increase in the supply. Sugar is needed for ordi- nary food purposes too urgently to be Cake is toothsome even if not frosted"
 4 request to cut out the iced cakes should be regarded as a rule. Hereto fore the food administrators requests have been cheerfully and universally granted by the people The various days of abstention from particular staples of diet have been generally and conscien- tiously observed. And so it should be in the matter of the cakes.
 The food administrator has not im- posed needless burdens or sacrifices upon the people. There has been a sound reason for every rule and request As soon as the shortage has been overcome in any particular line he has notified tions. Meats and wheat have been ad- mitted to more liberal use, as occasion has permitted. Now the sugar must be saved, and in this small item of iced cakes the public can surely do it's best, as it has in all other particulars of the national food saving effort, which has been an inspiring display of patriotic en- deavor.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-10-07

effect of bumper gate receipts at the opening can scarcely be over estimated
 The exhibits are larger and more varied than ever before. The results of crop diversification will be marked ly in evidence. And the people of the city should see the displays so as to get a better idea of what Alabama farmers are doing and learn how the mercantile interests of Birmingham are bound up in the prosperity of the tillers of the soil and the breeders of live stock. The, larger the crowd to- day the greater the incentive to the exhibitors to do even better next year.
 If you cannot spend the forenoon or the afternoon at the Fair, take at least an hour off during the day, have glance at the show and go again tomorrow for fuller survey.
 But your presence today, if only for a short while, will encourage the management and count beyond measure.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-10-07
GLORIOUS YEAR FOR RAINBOWS

front before Chalons you were thrown against the picked troops of Germany. For eight consecutive days you attacked skillfully prepared positions. You cap- tured great stores of arms and muni- tions. You faced the crossings Of the Ourcq. You took Hill PIP, Sergy, Meurcy Ferme and Seringes by assault You drove the enemy. including an imperial guard division, before you for a depth of ls kilometres. When your infantry was re- lieved it was in full pursuit of the re- treating Germans and your artillery con- tinued to progress and support another American division in the advance to the Vesle
 For your services in Lorraine your division was formally commended in gem eral orders by the French army corps under which you served. For your ser- vices in Champagne your assembled of ficers received the personal thanks and commendation of Gen. Gouraud himself. For your services on the Ourcq your di- vision was officially complimented in letter from the commanding general First army corps, of July 2s, 1918.
 ITO your success all ranks and all ser vices have contributed, and I desire to express to every man in the command my appreciation of his devoted and courageous effort.
 However, our position places a bur. den of responsibility upon us which we must strive to bear steadily forward without faltering. To our comrades who have fallen we owe the sacred obIiga- tion of maintaining the reputation which they died to establish. The influence or our performance on our allies and our enemies cannot be overestimated, for we were one of the first divisions sent from our country to France to show the world that Americans can fight.
 Hard battles and long campaigns lie before us. Only by ceaseless vigilance and tireless preparation can we fit our selves for them I urge you, therefore. to approach the future with confidence. but above all with firm determination that so far as it is in your power you will spare no effort whether In training of in combat to maintain the record ot our division and the honor of our coun- try"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-10-07
c30ulzIlM1AnusiI
HUN GIVES SERVICE

Eroy, the New York Evening Sun. ,
 There's a dusky corporal in the 18th ragiment of New York who used to jug gle dishes in a Broadway restaurant. He Is noted as the noisiest, braggiest darkey south of the Arctic circle. When his regiment reached the firing line in France Henry marched his squad into the trenches and assumed his right as ranking officer to be the first to climb up on the firing step for look at the. Germans. according to the story that has come back to San Juan Hill.
 Henry, who with all his boastfulness is no coward strengthened up to his full height and glared with rolling eyes at the desolate panorama before him. Then he shook his left fist in the direc- ton of Berlin as he waved his auto matic in the air.
 Come on, you Bush soldiers'' he cried. Come on, you Heinie Kaiser! Come on you Krupp guns. Gimme some shells; Gimme some shrapne! Gimme some bombs. Dass all Gimme eml"
 At this instant big shell exploded about forty yards behind the front trench and the shock of the concussion sent Henry somersault over the pros trate bodies of two privates. When he
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-10-07
x x x Should Make Large Showing at the Fair

e17HE State Fair opens today and 4 Birmingham should be repre- scented by large attendance. Reduced rates have been made for the pupils of the Birmingham and Jefferson county schools and full turn out of boys and girls is assured.
 This years Fair is to be exception ally attractive-attractive from an educational point of view and doubly attractive in it's free act" features. No child should miss it.
 Al for grown-ups, every business man and every busy woman should make special effort to visit the Fair on tho first day, no matter how often visits may be repeated. The moral
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-10-07
Miss Roland on Midway

Yep, you will see a new attraction on the midway at the fair this year." said Miss Maude Roland, popular and clever manager of the cigar stand at the Tut wiler, who perhaps knows more about cigars and tobacco than anyone in Bir- mingham who does not use the weed.
 The fact is, am going into business for myself for one week. I have the con cession at the fair for cigars and to- bacco, and will be located near the check stand, adjoining the Western Union booth. l am going to mop up, too-Just watch me. am the best little ballyhooer that ever ballyhooed. and there will be line of nicotine conversation handed the users of the weed that will make them smoke up as they never have smoked before. I am sure that 1 will enjoy the outing for week, but I will be fair with you, am out there for the change--and I don't mean change of scen- ery--I- mean the kind that will rattle and buy Liberty Bonds I want everyone who smokes to stop in at my smoke house, for l will have plenty of matches to give them-even if they do make ngh; of them after I have furnished them'
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-10-07

From the New York Evening Sun.
 M MAJ. GEN. CHARLES T. MENO- .lMl HER of the "a division has aa- ave dressed to that body an inter- esting review of the Rainbow Division s.' accomplishments in the year past. Start ing with the time it was formed, Maj. Gen. Menoher traces it's actions from the entrance into the trenches in Lorraine in February to the glorious victories re- gently won.
 His message dated August 13, which has just been received here, reads:
 ITO the Officers and Men of the Forty
 second Division:
 "A year has elapsed since the forma- tion of your organization. It is, there fore. fitting to consider what you have accomplished as combat division and what you should prepare to accomplish in the future.
 Your first clements entered the trenches in Lorraine on February 2l. You served on that front for no days You were the first American division to hold divisional sector and when you left the sector June 21 you had served continuously as division in the trenches for longer time than any other Ameri- can division. Although you entered the sector without experience in actual war. fare you so conducted yourselves as to win the respect and affection Of the French veterans with whom you fought Under gas and bombardment, in raids, in patrols, in. the heat of, hand-to-hand combat and in the long dull hours ot trench routine so trying to a soldiers spirit you bore yourselves in a manner worthy of the traditions of our country
 You were withdrawn from Lorraine and moved immediately to the Cham pagne front, where during the critical days from July 14 to July IS you had the honor of being the only American division to fight in Gen. Gouraud's army which so gloriously obeyed his order, We will stand or die,' and by it's iron defence crushed the German assault and made possible the offensive of July IS to the west of Rheims.
 From Champagne you were called to take part in exploiting the success north or the Marne. Fresh from the battle
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-10-07

l. should be comparatively easy to save fruit pits for Uncle Sam. No person in his right mind wants to swallow them.
 i: 4 # With so many women wearing plain but serviceable uniforms, an overdressed woman is more conspicuous than ever.
 < x * The shadow of a cold, bleak winter, bringing starvation, disease and death, rests on hapless Russia.
 # # # Writers of movie scenarios show a dis regard for history which could hardly be called refreshing.
 * T * Beware the Teuton bearing peace of fers with string tied to them.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-10-07
THE MESSAGE

You are the mother of the son with our forces overseas whisper comes to you that the Germans are ready Tor just peace. This whisper may come from a&neighbor, or it may come in print, or in some other way. The neighbor, or the author of the lines in print, may be only foolish, or he may be a sym pathizer with Germany. Your son is be- yond the Flanders crosses, row on row, along the danger line, facing the ex- ploding shells and poison gas of the unpitying enemy. Other men in his com pany have been killed. Perhaps you would be more than human if you did Perhaps it is not strange if you arc tempted to believe, and to say, we must make the just peace the Germans are willing to accept" Not strange!-- with peace your boy comes home, with out it he stays to face the exploding shells and the poison
 But what of the son of another mother, who sleeps in Flanders fields? we are the dead" If he could speak, would he say. Let them have their peaceY' The answer has been made by one now him- self of their company:
 "If ye break faith with us who die, We shall not sleep, though peoples grow
 In Flanders fields"
 That your son may know immediate safety it must not be that those other women's sons died in vain. They have given the Hast full measure of devotion,'' and they, more than we who have given almost nothing. arc entitled to speak. Take up our quarrel with the foe" It must not be that their death was fruit less, nor must the son of your son be forced to go through this same ordeal a quarter century from now.
 For of course the point is here; The Germans do not want just peace. A just peace means the wiping out Of their whole military machine and most Of their dangerous feudal system of gov ernrnent. A just peace means the hang ing of considerable number of Ger mans of high rank who have ordered the violations of all the rules of civilized warfare A just peace means that the Germans must pay for all the unlawful damage they have done. The Germans do not want ~a just peace.
 This job must be finished. We shall not break faith. These dead in Elan ders did not die in vain. While the larks still bravely sing, our guns must as bravely speak below till peace is won of which both the dead and the sons of our sons can say: They kept faith"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-10-07
srANDARDIzING SHOES

From tne New York World.
 The government has fixed the prices of various commodities, but its action in standardizing shoe prices and styles is an interesting innovation. By the rul- ing of the war industries board, shoes Of what is designated as Class, A will re- tail at from s9 to SIP. of Class B from $5 to $780, and of Class c not to ex- ceed &75 Styles and fashions of shoes are reduced from about 65O to l5O and the feathers used are restricted to three colors, black and light and dayk tan. Particularly as respects womens foot wear, the maximum prices are material. ly below those now obtaining Consum- CTS who want to pay a fancy price for fancy shoes may still have them made to order; the ruling imposes no curb or profiteering by individual shoemakers.
 But for the general public, which has had to pay in many cases exorbitant war prices for shoes. the reduction will prove boon. Manufacturers are hound to object to it on principle; but since neither
 cattlemen, packers nor manufacturers benefited from the inflated prices, per
 haps they will fare better under fixed prices
 l At least the scale established is a lib- era! one. There ought to be fair mar gin of profit in making serviceable
 shoe to sell at from s9 to sl2, prices well above those exacted before the war Standardizing shoe styles, moreover. should have the good effect of eliminat- ing the waste due to overproduction of freak shoes. There are excellent reasons
 to suppose, indeed, ><hat federal regula- l try will systematize and otherwise im- | prove it.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-10-07

From the Woman's Home Companion. MMANY people think that of all the
 UWl reams of poetry brought forth by
 the war there has been nothing to compare in thought and expression with
 Tn Flanders Fields" by Lieut.. Col. John McCrae of the Canadian army med- ical corps, since dead at the front:
 "In Flanders fields the poppies blow
 Between the crosses, row on row,
 That mark our place; and in the sky
 The larks, still bravely singing. fly,
 Scarce heard amid the guns below.
 We are the dead. Short days ago
 We lived, felt dawn. saw sunset glow,
 Loved and were loved and now we lie In Flanders fields.
 "Take up our quarrel with the foe! To you, from failing hands, we throw The torch. Be yours to lift it high! If ye break faith with us who die, We shall not sleep, though poppies grow In Flanders fields"
 However beautiful may be the express
 sion in this poem, it seems subordinate to the thought, and need not detain us here The dead speak in these lines, and we who live must heed.
 There can be no question as to the out come of this war. The spiritually and intellectually civilized part of the world
 has resolved that the portion intellec- tually civilized only must be subdued. 1t this portion had kept the peace It would have been left to breed and barter in it's hut ha and came ravening out of it's jungle. The Germans know that they are going to be beaten, as well as the allies know it. For months, however, Germany has hoped, and she still hopes. that by some chance she may make peace which will Germany knows that the spiritually civ ilized world did not want war and long ago came to hate this war forced upon it. It is here that we must heed the voice of those who lie in Flanders fields. "If ye break faith-"l
 The creatures called, for want of more precise term, ''pacificists," have grown constantly less numerous. Noise ra ther than numbers distinguished them even from the first But to millions of our people there comes sometimes the
 temptation to long for peace. even
 though it falls short of victory. Has not
 the torch beenf carried almost Tar
 enough? Even if taken up, may it not
 be held a little less high?
 These millions of our people" are
 so ,,,. of tba fathers and mothers Of
 the soldiers who have gone to the front'
 we are thinking particularly or the
 mothers.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-10-07
Decatur VIII Go Over

dropped off in my old stamping ground, Decatur for few hours last week.. said H. L. Morrill,, now engaged in Y M. c. A. work, "and l was not surprised to note that Decatur was get tlng up the grade ready to lunge over the top shortly in the fourth Liberty Loan drive. I knew that she would do 1t, and am proud to see the earmarks or good organization and much hard work having been done there by the com mittee in charge.
 T had the pleasure of participating in the past drives there, and naturally 1t gives me great pleasure in seeing the good work that is being done now. De. catur knows how to do, and she can al- ways be counted upon to deliver with g punch when the time comes"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-10-07
IT'S ALL RIGHT. BOY

By Mai Bailey Tull. It's all right. boy. sinve I've thought
 it out; You're miles away, but you're happy
 no doubt. Yet your poor old dad can't help be-
 ing sad When he thinks of the good old times
 we've had. It seems like you ought to come whis- And tell us all about where you've
 been When the moon swings low, and the
 stars shine out. But it's all right, boy, since I've
 thought it out. It's all right. boy I'm glad you could I'd never have you stacker. you You're fine and strong and brave and
 true, Ready to do what Uncle Sam wants
 you to. Only we miss you 8 lot for you're all
 we've got. And we've watched you grow iron,
 tiny tot. But it's all right. boy, since I've
 thought it out. Just make as good q soldier as you
 were a scout. It's all right. boy. you're under the
 flag. You must not shirk, you must not lag And if the clarion call you hear, Meet death bravely and without fear. But. best of all. when the vcitory's
 won. And you've put to flight the last
 bloody Hun, Let your boy heart lead you to the
 old home-nest. Back to mother and dad, who love
 you beat sss.. E sss
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-10-07
Swivel Chair Heroes
 Unfairly Criticized

IN ESPITE the fact that they are l1 presumably doing work as nec- essary to the successful prosecution of the war as men at the front and many of them, were they permitted, would gladly serve on the firing line, "swivel chair" officers in Washington are oc- casionally called hard names. Inciden- tally, some of the most indignant of the -blooded" critics are not them selves at the front.
 A New York man expresses his feelings as follows in a communica- tion to the Evening Sun:
 No good American begrudges the
 boys at the front the very best
 food and clothing the country can
 give them. We cheerfully adjust
 our diets to meet MT. Hoover's ev- ' cry wish and in order to conserve
 materials, wear our clothes an ex-
 tra season or two and have our
 shoes resoled as long as the up-
 pers will stand for it, but 1t is
 more than difficult to arouse en-
 thusiasm over the use of the
 leather we have thus conserved
 for puttees for little generals
 doing stenography and typewrit-
 ing in quartermaster depots at
 home and for swivel chair officers.
 who have never been nearer the
 battle fronts than Washington or New York and have no more need
 of leather puttees thans of ar mored>tank&a a daily convoy be-
 tween office and home.
 Using President Wilson's favorite golf expletive, we would say to this gentleman, tut, tut. Even were the situation more serious we should think twice before detracting one iota from the splendid appearance of our "lit- tie generals" Without going into em- barrassing details, the trousers of mill itary men are so cut that unless there were something more about their neither limbs they would shock the ladies by indecent exposure of socks and unmentionables. They have to wear leggins and in the circumstances leather puttees are the most logical covering Not only do they look well, but one pair should last a swivel chair officer a lifetime. Now, as for the seat of his that's another matter.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-10-07
PRINCE MAYS RECORD

From the New York Times.
 Prince Max was born July 10, 1867. In 1900 he married Marie Louise. princess royal of Great Britain and Ireland, and Duchess of Brunswick Lunneburg, whose father, the septuagenarian Duke of Cum berland, and whose brother the Duke of Brunswick, are both under restraint in the Cumberland chateau on Lake Gmun- den, Austria. The prince himself has been an inmate of an insane asylum. That was in 1895. after he had been tilted mirovna of Russia on account of his ai- legged philanderings.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-10-07
DEFERRED PAYMENT

From Harper's Magazine,
 A little girl of Ssentered a store in q small town and said:
 q want some cloth to make my dolly 6 dress.'
 The merchant selected some and handed the child the package.
 How much is it?" she asked
 Just one kiss was the repiy'
 All right" said the child, as she turned to go. grandma said to tell you she would pay you when she came in tomorrow"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1918-10-07
Gets Fine sansages

nave for quite while been fortu- nate enough to get some fancy smoked sausages from one of the best house. keepers in the state, who lives in a nearby town," said W. B. Leedy.
 would tell her name but l am afraid might be limited on my supply and am just selfish enough not to put any one wise. She seems to know just how to give them a taste that one cannot get from any of the markets or any of the advertised brands, I am sorry to learn that one of my preacher friends has gotten Oh to my game, for it is hard to down minister when he gets his mouth set for chicken or sausage