Saint Mary's beacon. [volume] (Leonard Town, Md.) 1867-1983, 1918-03-28
Mr.. SIMPkINS PAYS
HIS INCOME TAX
~ aoBERT McsLAIR.

DeGu pEVulOteu AON f1aOk 10Ah"b t@A~
Civil War and had died brayely on the
field OF action. Mr.. SimpkIns' throat
ached now for two reasons: First. he
reverenced and adored the memory OF
ais father; secondly. his age and bis
eyes and his game leg wouldn't let him
20 TO wEr himself. And as he observed
the martial bearing and uncompromis-
ing gaze Of Colonel Simpkins he saw,
in magma ton, the khaki clad lads VI
the new generation marching forth and
crossing three thousand miles Of sea to
fight, maybe die. for liberty.
Mr.. Simpkins peered around to make
sure that neither Bess nor John (who
we're at the teasing ages of sixteen
and .seventeen) were where they could
see him, then he Strengthened and
threw his right arm mp for a salute.
But his equity shoulder twinged, and he
groaned. He couldn't even salute.
Damn" said Mr.. Simpkins. and
with his other hand fiercely twirled his
white mustnchios.
He turned and limped into the IL
brary and sat down crealriiy before the
mahogany desk on which were lying
the blanks for his income tar state
ment, blanks which he had rather
grumpily got from the Internal Reye-
nue. officer only that day after lunch
con on his way home from the club.
Mr.. Simpkins' income for 1917 had
amounted to just about $4,000, and he
had been rather snappy on the sub
ject OF taxes ever since he had discoy-
cred that the more income man has
the greater the percentage Of It he
pays In taxes. He could think OF sew
eral men who. like himself, were mar
ried and had two children, and yet,
although their incomes were nearly
half Of bis. they would pay only a
small Traction OF the amount he paid.
He gioontIy drew the blank nearer
and began filing in the information
that II asked for.
As Mr.. Simpklng income was $4,000
he had to figure out the amounts pay.
able on each Of the successive smaller
classes of incomes in order to arrive
at the total due from himself. He
passed over thu first class who must
pay taxea. that IL. single men making
over 1000. His calculation for mar
rted men then showed up as fellows:
First. they pay per cent (under
the 1915 lAwt ON all income over
$4,000, deducting 800 for each Of their
children under eighteen years. In Mr.
Slmpkins' case this was 1912, which he
put down in the payable column
He saw next that, under the 1917
law, married men pay an additional 2
per cent. on all over $2,O00-with the
same allowance for children. This
added $3.50 to his payable" column.
He then observed that for every
$4,000 jump In his income over 5000
he had TO pay Surtax. the percentage
growing larger with each jump. This
was $3.50 more added TO his burden.
And on top Of all this came an "Ex-
cess Profits" tar Of per cent. on all
Occupation" income over 5000, max
ing ST20 more.
The total, then, he must pay was four
teen hundred and thirty-four dollars
"Whswr" exclaimed Mr.. simpklns
angriiy. ...rhere's young Henry VIII.
kinn, wifoA Id Jake JohnsoD's gail.
be rpsEkee s2.0O6 hnauAe doesn't nav a
cent o. taxes. guess this h his wal
a. well as miner
Thinking Of young Henry wilkins
he remembered that Mrs. wilkins went
every afternoon to make bandages for
the Red Gross and that Henry, who
was a lawyer, was aiding the Local
Draft Board with Its questionnaires.
WELL" he admitted to himself
''that makes difference"
He thought next OF Judge willough
by, whose income was about $1,000.
HE only pays $40" commented Mr.
Simpkins, not quite 80 angrily this
time; and then thought struck him
and he sat up rigidly In bis chair.
Judge WIlloughby's son had been
drowned on the TuscaniA when IL was
summarized with the loss OF two hun
dred soldiers.
Judge Willoughby gave his son "a
America" muttered Mr. Simpkins
He leaned forward suddenly and put
his face In his hands.
For a long time Mr.. SLnpkins sal
very still in that position. There was
no sound in the library except the
ticking Of the tall clock and an occa'
sional trill Of laughter from the chill.
drcn skylarking upstairs. The square
of light on the carpet gradually with
drew itself through the window, and
first twilight and then darkness settled
In about the quiet, white haired. some
times irascible old man.
Mr.. Simpkins was thinking thing'
which he would never afterward speah
Of, he was thinking things that were
too sacred ever to be put into words
But some mixing OF his thoughts ma,
be found IN his rejoinder TO Mrs
Simpkins when that placid lady cam'
In and turned on the lights, and asked
him whether he was ready FOR dinner
Judge Willoughby's only son Wal
worth as much as fourteen hundred
and thirty-four dollars, wasn't her
Mr.. simpkins demanded Of her.
AS his wife. who was not unused {,
his superficial irritations, watched hin
In mild establishment, Mr.. Simpkin
Iimped out TO the hail and took hi
old felt hat and silver-headed cam
from the hat rack. Letting himself GU
into the foggy evening, he tapped hi
way down to the corner. and mailed hi
income tax statement and check witt
bis own hands.
"Now, God be thanked" said Mi
simpkins as the lid cianked shut owe
his missiye, Il can do this much 70
NY country, anyhow"
- ------s-
The Model sHdes."
] will say this respecting the horse