Evening star., 1918-04-14
The OTHER ANGLE
Proud Patches.
BY KIRK MILLER.

While Secretary McAdoo is buster than
a porcupine with ingrowing quills max
ing sthe third liberty loan acute and
keeping that hour of daylight from
catching up with his trains. he has
found time to peel off wrapper of
philosophy which would do to paste in
your hat or on your automobile wind
shield.
Mr.. McAdoo's message to the gentle
men of North Carolina is to wear
patches and win the war. and he doesn't
believe it should be a long time between
half-soled shoes or anything. In our
own vernacular we should say he said
an earful-for a bird who is too proud
to wear patches is entirely too naughty
to live on this war-spangied earth, and
would probably be glad to see the war
prove a fiat failure because it interferes
with his ukelele lessons.
Howsomever, patches are to be a part
and parcel of this regatta, and 1t doesn't
make any difference whether you wear
'em three-cornered or on the bias. A
patch is a patch, whether it's on your
Tapping languidly in the American ter
rain is a signal to Germans that they
have twisted themselves into a terrible
morsel of macaroni
Now that it's fully decided that the
kaiser is an awful sample of cheese we
don't think Wen buy any, for II the
legitimate order is anything like the
sample they'll have to revamp the
welsh rarebits and ring-tum- didies or
whatever disguise those Hawaiian
dishes are wearing this summer
We could render brilliant summing
up of the kaiser II somebody would
furnish the words. as all our words
are too good to waste on him, and the
English language hasn't got any to fit
him. Only trouble is our summing up
would sound more like subtraction, and
were TOO busy "etting "e@4v to subtract
him from his future. Easily!
Getting back to the patches. though.
we're serious about 'em. While Nat
Wills was alive he was supposed to be
patch connoiseur of the universe. and
when he licked off the /. w. W.'s and
bullshivik fell heir to the diadem
Wills could wear more patches to the
square inch than centipede has
knees. which proves that he was a
good American, according to the Nc
Adoo prescription.
Half-soled shoes, half-soled hats and
in habit-forming quantities so that the
soldier boys will not suffer. If we're
going to quarantine the fighters against
undernourishment and exposure to the
elements, we've got to expose some Of
those funny little short-tailed coats we
she'd never see.
Dig up in the old attic and unravel
those shoes you gave to the servant
to give to the policeman. They've got
leather in 'em which Is every reason
why they should be locked up in the
safe instead of being left around with
the papier-mache kicks for which we
now drag ourselves away from a ro-
bust bank roll.
An attic Is naive institution and
can hold more than a magician's high
hat. You've got some chance Of soIy-
ing the mystery of what is in hash, but
attics are very coquettish in letting
you know what they conceal Perhaps
If you probe around in your loft you'll
be jumped at by an old set of hoop
skirts which you can half sole and
thereby save that yard of suiting that
you would ordinarily have purchased
for your spring golfng smock. Or is
a yard too much?