The Greeneville daily sun. (Greeneville, Tenn.) 1918-1920, 1918-07-05
ADVICE TO LOVEL0RN
BY VINCENT c. PERRY.
Copyright, 1918. by the Mcclure Newspa-
per Syndicate.)

0N13 SVau - AnO young GuhM
am engaged to insists upon using
rose perfume on his hair, and
just detest the odor OF rose per-
fume on anybodys hair. am
afraid 1t is going to cause us to
break on our engagement. love
him dearly, too. What would you
adviser Broken Hearted"
Bob Clarke read the letter over and
showed piece of copy paper into his
typewriter. In less than half min
ute he had written a paragraph of
advice to Broken Hearted" and
pinned 1t to her letter, ready for the
printers. There was a heap Of letters
before him and he dealt with the ones
on top. They were all along the same
line.
When Bob had answered more than
he thought the editor would let go
through, he. sat back In his chair and
looked at the pile Of unanswered ones
that would have to go into the waste
paper basket. 1t seemed as If every
person in love In the city wrote to
"Joan" for advice. If they had known
that Joan was man-and a very
young one, too-perhaps there would
not have been so many letters.
Lovers Quarrels had always seemed
a joke to Bob, until he had had one
Of his own. 1t was no joke.
He paced up and down to think It
over and then sat down again. He
had the room to himself, so he was
able to think 1t out undisturbed.
He wished there was some one to
tell him how to go about 1t to Ak
things up. Then the idea came to
him. Why not follow some Of his own
advice? he thought. He had his col
umn on file for year back and he
went through the paper to locate a
case like his own. He did find one that
was very much like his. The girl In
the case had been just as stubborn
as Cleo and had banged down re-
celver just as Cleo had done. Re
ceivers seemed to be a popular
weapon In lovers quarrels. He read
his answer and noted each instruction.
BE bold; don't let her see that you
are down-hearted; go to her home
and demand admittance: show her
that you mean business, and she win
be sure to forgive you," he had said.
That answer didn't seem to fit his
case at all. But If "Pining Away"
had been successful, he didn't see why
he couldn't be, by carrying out the
same plan. It wouldn't hurt to try,
at any rate. Cleo couldn't do any
thing worse than close the door in his
face.
Cleo didn't slam the door In Bob's
face, but after she had snubbed his
every effort to talk to her, for fifteen
minutes, he wished she had.
"Why won't you be reasonable,
CleoT he pleaded at last.
"ReasonableI she exclaimed.
slave not been reasonablei 1t is
You who are not reasonable. If you
really had loved me you would be-"
"But / have apolOglzed, dear, and
taken all the blame" he said. "Won't
you be your old self again1 Why did
you allow me to come here IL you
weren't going to speak to met"
81 don't want you to take the blame
and / didn't want you to come here.
If you really thought you were to
blame you wouldn't acknowledge IT.
men never do.
There was an entirely new argu-
ment for Bob. He had always been
Of the impression that women were
odd, but now he was convinced of 1t.
"Any one will tell you / am. to
blame" he said. Then he was struck
with a sudden thought. "Why don't
you write to the Advice to the Love
lorn' column In the paperf The an-
swer will convince us who Is to blame.
Joan knows all about such things"
"But Joan must be a friend Of
yours; do you know who she isT'
Cleo asked suddenly.
"Joan is my worst enemy" he an
swered. ''My knowing who Joan is
won't make any difference in the re-
ply. I will guarantee that"
"You will have to help me compose
the letter." Cleo said, as she secured
the stationery.
Bob did most Of the debating and
Cleo did most of the writing, chang
ing his views Of 1t here and there.
"Read It over" Bob said, when It
was completed.
Cleo read 1t aloud,
Doesn't 1t sound foolishT' she
asked, as he finished. at Is as silly
as the ones that appear in the paper.
Bob, wen make idiots Of ourselves II
we send this in. We really didn't
have anything to quarrel over"
Il don't think we had. either" he
agreed. Lets settle it without send
ing this letter in. Tear 1t up"
Cleo needed no second bidding. The
letter was reduced to fragments
II am so glad we didn't decide to
send it." she sighed, YEARLY. "News-
paper people must have lots Of fun
out of letters like this one"
ave do" he answered seriously,
"but do you know, I'm never going TO
laugh at another Of those letters. III
answer any one OF them and I'll spend