Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1918-10-12
Little Talks by
Beatrice Fairfax
BY BEATRICE FAIRFAX

| some one-a man, of course
has written a letter asking me to
define the difference between an old
maid and bachelor girl.
1 don't know what the diction-
aries have to say on the subject, or
if they discourse to any extent on
the space thta sparates these two
states, but to the world at large
/ the dissimilarity is as the poles.
To be an "old maid" denotes a
state of mind rather than a con-
dition of single blessedness, and is
! by no means confined to the female
sex. Old maids in trousers and
! Derby hats and taking pride in
mustaches and pointed boards in
fest our street cars, professions and
public offices. The old maid may
be determined by, a tendency. to
ossify, or turn to bone, usually be-
ginning at the head.
They are opposed to change of
any sort, they like things to keep
on in the same old rut, because
they had always ben that way from
their earliest recollections.
| The genuine article, of either six,
is more concerned with things than
principles. A world war may be
raging, nations pershing of starva-
ton or by the sword, but the real
.ssue of life to the gentlemanly old
maid will be: Are my suspenders
where 1 have them every night q"
And to the ladylike old maid lis
my hat on straight?''
Their world is bounded on the
north by Me" on the south by My
Things" on the east by What I
hn hxr
4 Feel About Other People" Some
times a genuine old maid marries,
but not often; the responsibilit of
seeing some ones else shoes ar
ranged at what may be an offending
angle is too great a responsibility.
Better go through life unloved,
unwed, unmourned, than take such
chances. To the simon pure o. NJ.
there are really no such things as
The day l go to church, ride in a
Ford, ferry or trolley, according to
my circumstances. Monday is my.
Monday, but the day 1 have my
clothes washed. Tuesday, the day l
eat the last of the cold roast. We'd
nesday, the day my sweeping is
done. Thursday, the day go to the
movies or indulge myself in some
such recreation, etc,
LII line manner, 1871 4 is not the
year of the world war, but the year
l set out my scarlet runners, or had
my front tooth filled with porce-
lain"
"Prunes and Prisms Preferred"
This self-centered product had
flashes of patriotism, and would
honestly enjoy buying Thrift
Stamps, War Savings Certificates, or
even a Liberty Bond or two, but the
habit of vniesting in "Prunes and
Prisims preferred" has been formed
and the o. NJ. cant bear the thought
of risking change.
For very much the same reason
your typical o. NJ. is always an
for the compelling
motive that his or her grandmother
was one. Why they. do not wear
caps and hoopskirts for the same
reason it is difficult to follow.
We have old maids of this type in
the Sente, House and State Legis-
lature. We have always had them,
and like the Biblical poor, we shall
have them perpetually. The impa-
tient reformer does not always see
it, but these reactionaries are
valuable spur to all forward move
ments.
They are the pebbles that give
greater momentum to the stream of
progress. But we think of them
and lament their presence in Tenny-
sons apt phrase: "A yet-warm
corpse, and yet unburiable" Not
long ago, one of these ran for the
Presidency, he also undertook an
pleasure excursion, at
the governments expense, for which
a certain club awarded him % medal
for valor. l do not know the inscrip-
tion on this gift horse, but bearing
his record on women suffrage in
mind, it might have read: He has
not changed his mind i'm fifty
years"
Some times the old maid is young,
as years are counted, but as set as
a hard boiled egg in the matter of
convictions. The crown prince of
Germany, for instance, sees a per-
shing world waiting for him to set
1t straight.
The Bachelor Girl
The bashelor girl differs from the
old maid in that she lis invariably
feminine. We have no bachelor
girls in trousers and wearing mus
taches and boards, as we have old
maids-and all too many of them.
The bachelor girl is a spinster,
and as progressive as the old maid
is ractionary. The bachelor girl
almost always marries, and if she
does not, it Is for every reason but
lack of opportunity. She dresses
well, because she realizes that a
good appearance is the best intro
duction and while a dowdy jacket
may cover a noble heart. she real
ICES it will obtain slower recogni-
ton than if its nobility were mask
ed by one that is up-to-date.
The bachelor girl is human, gen.
uine and refreshingly free from
cant. She is never a Pollyanna-
glad because an automobile ran
over her, and thereby secured her
nonsense.
The bachelor girls were the first