Evening journal., 1918-05-14


ship sail by perpetual motion.
Someone asked Allen Hackett II this
wasn't a funny looking town all doled
up and no place 10 go. Yes" Hack
replied, and how much funnier II
would look II one were cross-eyed."
Bill Mckee. who studied tsutology IN
his Younger days, strolled into one Of
the swell restaurants the other day and
ordered one splash Of noise, seasoned
we'll, clough we'll done with COW 10
cover, are confined with a lick on and
chaser Of Adams ale.
Charles Ruf took bic Tin Lizzie out
for a ride the other day. She made
him 80 nervous that he lost control
Approaching the nearest ditch she
dumped poor Ruf on the bottom and
what q yel when she got on top for
she nearly smothered Charles till an
other Tin Liz came along and dragged
her on.
Johnny Cole, the vegetarian poet, 10
requested by Lee Franklin 90 show bic
smiling counlensnce any evening this
week Come on Johnny we need the
keys for the Keystone safe.
Well boys what do you think OF our
baseball team2 We arc OF the opinion
that before the season Is over the fans
will have 20 recognize us as the best
amateur team IN the staie.
Harry Jennings and Hook Meredith
are a couple OF players that any team
would be proud off, You other teams
better keep on them as we have the
lron-clad Keystone clamps on them
Big Joe Niischy. who some years ago
was classed as one Of the best pitchers
In the State. looks better than ever this
year. He showed the Elkton team that
he has the goods Even Rube Dunbar
was swinging like q gate without any
hinges.
With Virgins. Brodley and Graham
In the ouifeld where can you find q
better set OF ny chasers In the indie
pendent ranks Tho boys are regular
servers IN their position.
Mldse Mclaughlin Is one Of he class
lest and scrapplest innelders the city
has ever turned out He puts plenty OF
life into the boys and has the opposing
players almost crazy with his witty re-
marks That's the spirit Midge. old
top.
We have three utility men In Jen.
nings. johnson and Manager Hackett
All can ably 1ll the regulars shoes at
any time Hsckett and jennings can
also push the old ball In case the pitch
er goes dry
In Ricly Run we have catcher who
can catch them long ways. short wsys
front side and back side. You're lust
the quality cap, more power 10 you.
Jake Reason. who is a pocket edition
Of Stuffy McInnis In the neld and a
Frank Baker az the bat, promises TO put
couple Of balls IN the Delaware river
next Saturday al New Castle. Hope
youll stick % your promise Jake. We
are with you.
All baseball players and rooters are
asked to meet al he club SATURDAY Al
40 O'Clock, as we want 10 so over 10
New Castle 30 strong
We we're surprised 10 hear that some
or our members PLAYED knof-hole fans
at the Harlan-Lebanon game Lee
Franklin fsred better than the rest M
the boys He had q reserved seat IN a
tree along the causeway. Lee was also
accused OF taking Joe Farrell up 10
share honors with him on ton Of the
tree. II IS claimed Lee pulled him IN
with the skyhook
Arthur Cooper witnessed the game AZ
south side Park last Saturday in hls
aerodrome which Is a mysterious CON
struction similar 20 the skyhook.
When Manager Payne, Of Harlan. dis
covered that Biddle was in the bleachers
ne ordered locks and keys placed on the
Dahs. That accounts for Dumoni los
ing MS speed In the closing inning He
claimed the locks were overweight.
zealand tried 70 get IN the game free
by trying TO make the ticket tsker be-
lieNe ne was a detective. He displaved
hoek-shop detective badge but 10 didn't
work.
Russell Boyer was he only member
that was a sport at last Saturdays Har-
Ian game He sat In the reporters box
some one said the only way he got there
was by climbing the flag pole. We did
not know that-we had steepls-lack IN
our club.
Herbert Booze. one OF our former
members walked into the FIRE Insurance
otlce and wished 10 insure his barn.
Few haystaoks and q flock OF geese
what facilities have YOU for extinguish-
ing nre in your village. Mr.. Booze, in
quired the clerk. Booze scratched his
bushy dome and pondered over the
matter a little while and replied. well. |
It rains sometimes"
Wonder what makes Lu Franklin so
fat2 some say he must be eating sol |
dier's wood u always goes TO the
front
Curb your broad phnosophisins
You'll be only what YOU are. always .
laughing lchewngl and surmlsing all
The corner Of the square. "
Bill Mckee also witnessed the Har-
Ian game by sending wireless message