The Washington herald., 1918-02-17

do you mean to tell me that as
old q woman as you are. you haven't
the backbone to let whisky alone?
What is to become OF you in your
last moments? Do you expect to die
in the gutter? Can't you see what
whisky is doing for these younger
people,"
Mary crimmins WINGED. almost
crumpled up under this lecture from
the court.
No wonder. Mary was nearly "a
years of age. How much Of this time
she spent uppling whisky goodness
only knows.
She was picked up on Seventh street
on Friday night shivering with the
cold, as drunk as any woman ever
gets to be.
For twenty years she held one Job.
She was fired from this job about a
million times for fooling with the
booze.
The last time she got fred the boss
wouldn't forgive her or take her back.
So she drowned her troubles. Her
own children refused to do anything
for her. Her husband left her long
ago because even he, a moderate
drinker. couldn't put up with her ac-
tions.
The court recommended that she be
sent to Blue Plains. She was willing
to go anywhere to get away from
Washington.
The probation officer took charge
of Mary. He may be able to do
something with the pitiful wreck.
Didn't Like wife's Relatives.
When Ted CARRIER married Lillian
Emery he had no idea what all her
in-laws were going to do.
He thought that with 60 miles be-
tween them he would be perfectly
safe.
He was for about six months.
Then one by one they came on to
visit him.
First, his wife's brother Joe came.
Then Irene, her sister. bobbed up.
Then some of her cousins, first, sec
ond and third, came on.
He stood 1t for a while. But when
he saw the grocery bills and counted
up how much they borrowed from him
and didn't pay back. he almost
tainted.
He talked the matter over with LII
lian. She wasn't very pleased at him
mentioning her relatives.
Then Ted boxed her jaws. He did
several other mean things.
While the court could see that he
had cause to be riled, it couldn't see
where he had any business to hurt
Lillian.
But he got of easy. 1t only cost
him ten spot
Soused, BY Gum!
There is considerable contention
among medical men and laymen
about the virtues of whiskey as a
cough remedy.
Granted that It may be useful, is
1t necessary to nearly drown your
self to get rid Of a cough?
Is it wise even IL you get rid of
the cough, to get yourself in such
shape that you have an ailment al
most as bad as the cough?
For quite a little while, Tom
Jeffries argued about this with the
court. Tom had been pinched. He
was drunk. the cop said.
He wasn't drunk, Tom said. He
was Just naturally weak.
There Is no law, the court said,
to prevent man taking a swig of
whiskey to help a cold. Neither
does the law say how much or how
little to take.
Tom was staggering along the
street. His breath spoke for itself.
Only one thimbleful did he take,
Tom swore. His, weakness. due to
the racking cough, prevented him
from walking straight.
The court said that IL Toms cough
was as bad as he said 1t was he
should have stayed in the house. SIS
fine for him.
:. 'Tis q Cold, Cold world.
A poor old man. hardly able to
stand, with his clothes in tatters. his
hair dlsheveled. his knees shaking,
faced the court.
He was charged with jumping his
board bill.
He owed SIS. a woman said, and
she must have II.
The man contehded that he didn't