Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1918-06-15
Preface to an Obituary for
the Kaiser


assembled the throne; but one does not
think of Wilhelm in connection with
throne A throne is something to sit down
on In all the innumerable photographs of
the Kaiser we have never seen one show
ing him sitting down Except on horseback.
We wish we had the right touch for
writing a little sketch of the Kaiser's thirty
years. career as German Emperor. 1t ought
to be done with ripe rare flavor; with a
sting of satire and with fine bass note
of anger. Marse Watterson got $500 Tor
some such enormous SUM for writing ITO
hell with the Hohenzolerns." If we could
only blast off something vivid and zig
gag like that, perhaps some one would
send us a check.
Our trouble seems to he that I'VE don't
hate the Kaiser enough. 1t seems to US
that hatred requires a big object; target
commensurate with the emotion. Hatred
is pretty serious and venomous kind OF
feeling: it implies an intensity and ferocity
of dislike that cannot be wasted on any
thing petty or picayune. One does not
hate a centipede. One does not hate
maniac.
We hate people who talk too much: we
hate people who bother us when we are
busy; we hate people who believe every.
thing they hear we ha people who disbe-
lieve everything they hear. Sometimes we
hate ourself. But how can we hate the
Kaiser. that poor pathetic lunatic, that in
oil ipf in th0usa nj
uniforms? In a better job perhaps he
wouldn't have been bad sort: an ag.
gressive salesman, a brisk bartender, an
endless retailer of snappy smoking-room
stories. Age doth not wither nor custom
stale his infinite fund of energy. And
think what a blessing he has been to the
| cartoonists. No, as far as hating goes,
| Wilhelm is a big thing to look for. but
| small thing to find.
The only time we really feel bitter toward
| the Kaiser is when we pass one of our
| favorite second hand bookstores and think
| of all the books we might have bought If
| we hadn't skimped and scrooged to buy
Liberty Bonds. Then. it is true. a feeling
of resentment almost akin to hatred does
vibrate in our placid heart.
The first thing the Kaiser did on June Is.
1885 when the great nation of Germany
| was committed to his hands, was to issue
| a proclamation to the army. We were
| born for one another" he told his soldiers.
| These were the words of mental irrespon-
! sible. Indeed, the Kaiser has shown but
few signs Of rational control since June
| 16, 1871. the day he rode his piebald pony
| down Inter den Linden in the gittering
| trumphal procession after the Franco
| Prussian War. He was reared in the echo
| Of that drilling, tramping foolery" Of
| Prussian militarism; he was besotted and
| bedazZled with the grotesque dream Of
| soldierly glory. Most of us are. as chill.
| dren; there is no game so delightful as
| that of playing soldiers; as a game, war
| fare is magnificent: but to take it seriously
to conceive the breaking of women's hearts
as trade for grown men-it is madness.
Old Doctor Hintzpeter, the Kaisers tutor,
has naively recorded his difficulties with
| his erratic charge. He said that Wilhelm
was totally unable to fix his thoughts on
any one subject, and his character ma
tured with almost tropical rapidty." Ger
tanly his character, whether mature or
not, has since exhibited some of the
| freakish and brightly coored poisonous
growths Of tropical fungi. The Kaiser
seems to have conquered his inability to
concentrate; see how his thoughts have been
fixed for four years on that entry into
Paris. Still, to concentrate for four years
on an impossible idea is not very high
proof of sanity.
1t is a bit hard to account for Wilhelm's s
streak of insanity. His father and mother
were both very reputable people. Certainly
it would be hard to find saner. shrewder
old lady than his grandmother Queen Vic.
toria. His mother was English and he had
an English wetnurse. When he was born
Berlin was decorated with English flags
out of compliment to his mother; and the
London papers burst into congratulatory
verses. One such paper wrote Din the meter
of the national hymn:
Hail the auspcious morn
| To Prussia's throne is born
| A royal heir.
May he defend its laws,
Join with old Englsnds cause,
! Thus win all mems applause.
|
But alas, one cannot always depend on
birth and parentage to guarantee perfec-
ton. Let us not forget 1--WE say it in due
humility that the parents of Dr. Krupp
Won Bohlen were Philadelphians and his
grandfather general in the Civil War
The Kaiser's English mother and wetnurse
did not avail to graft in him British COM
rka, 8 f,,,il,
fevered him as measles or scarlatina does
most infants. Undoubtedly the swift mad
dening glory of 1870 had a deal to do with
the permanent scrambling of Wiihelm's
volatile brain. Reared against that trellis
work of military prowess, what could the
young mind do but blossom in bombs and
bayonets.