The Washington herald., 1918-03-10

such Ii Life.
The court almost scared George
Taylor to death
George is a little bit of a fellow
"a shrimp" is what his wife, Estelle,
calls him.
She had him arrested for threaten
ing to kill her.
The case looked like a joke-George
looks like a peanut beside his 800
pound spouse.
DO All hab to 60 back en- lib wild
dat woman, judge?" he pleaded with
tears In his eyes. "Cause ef All
has to she will sure land on me
en- All will halter to go to de
horspistol."
NO" answered the court, you
don't have to live with her-but you
mustn't carry out that threat"
"Ah neber did mex any threats
Jedge," squeaked George, dat wom-
an is too big for me ter handle. She
eben made me marry her."
At one time during the hearing
when the court was telling George
what to do and what not to do.
he almost dropped when the court
suggested a reconciliation.
Reconciliation to George meant a
lot of bandages wrapped around him
and maybe a lot of people walking
slow behind him.
The court could see which OF the
two were dangerous, and accordingly
let George go under bonds to keep
the peace.
Stanley Refused to BE Left.
ledge, All Ierf nah husban' en-
ftUn Aa
honery dat no decent spectacle wo-
man could lib aroun' him.
He follows me to Washin'ton.
aroun' en- bodder me. Den he slaps
She hit her ownsen. Jedge."
ed by his wife. Ida, with assaulting
her. 'Ah went ter TEX de chair
awayfen de doah so All could git
outen de house en- she jumped at
me-"
Don't you know" said the court,
that you haven't any business to
come around to where your wife is
stopping and worry her to deathT'
She's gotta cum back home wild
me. Jedge," said Stanley.
Not unless she wants to-" an
swered the court. "She is her own
boss and don't you forget IT."
"Ah thought All was her boss,
Jedge." said the surprised husband.
cause wen we married she prom
ised to obey en- lub me-"
Il know that, too" replied the
court. but her marriage vows say
nothing about her standing for your
brutality. Pay q fine of SO and
stay away from her or you will go
to Jail"
Three Pickles.
Il wasn't exactly what you call
drunk. Jedge." pleaded Harry Roll
ins. And 1 want a chance to get
out Of this II l can"
There is only one way I know
OF that you can get out Of it," said
the court, "and that is to pay a fine
OF s25 or go down for thirty days.
Il am not going to give you men
prizes for coming here for being
drunk. You ought to figure on hav-
ing 325 before you get drunk"
"Ah am a cripple Jedge," said
Emmett Washington. "en dat is
what made de cop think l was
staggering drunk"
Il see, said the court. you were
crippled in one leg and got drunk
in the other. 1 am sorry that that
tree you fell against didn't get out
OF your way so that policeman
wouldn't have seen you. Twenty
five dollars fine"
Il was walkin' along with another
man Jedge." said Tom Hall. "and
the cop ran up and said 1 was
drunk"
But there was no other man
there" answered the court. and
therefore if you saw a man beside
you when there really wasn't any
there-then you must have been
drunk. Twenty-Five dollars fpe."
Softly There, Annie.
Dat woman's husban' sent her
'roun to nah house aftah nah hus-
BAN. Dey wanted him to shoot craps.
Now Jedge. All doan allow nah hus-
BAN to do anything lax dat. Den she
up en- cuss me-"
She cussed me fust, ledge" pIped
Anne Carter, charged with disorder
ly conduct by Josie Thomas, "she
tole me to git de h away fen her
house"
Den All tole. her, Jedge," went on
Annie. dat All wouldn't cuss her
ef she cum foun to nah house, en-
she kept on cussin'''.
The whole trouble started when
Annie went around to Josie's house
to deliver a message to the latter's s
husband.
Josie swears II was q message cal
culated to bring her husband out of
the house to join a crap game, some
thing which she had positively for
hidden him to indulge in.
A cop heard the cussing and Josie
motioned him to take charge Of An
ME.
But Annie swears that Josie started
IT by ordering her away from the
house.
And since the cop only heard An
ME swearing he could not very we'll
arrest Josie.
Pay a fine OF S." said the court
to Annie. "or 60 to Jail for fifteen
days"
just NaturaI-BoFn LakIness.
Whoever it was that invented
work. he or she has the undying
hatred Of Paul Jackson.
II Paul ever worked 1t was al the
workhouse.
There is no record whatever Of
his ever doing anything harder than
chewing his food or drawing his
breath.
Once his father nronoised hin, a