The Appeal. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn. ;) 1889-19??, 1918-04-27
Mr.. SIMPKlNS PAYS
HIS INCOME TAX
BY ROBERT MceLAIR.

49, S11O ttVOO1vl6 ~
BY ROBERT McsLAlR. ii.
Mr.. Simpkins gazed at the portrait
on the wall till his eyes filed with
tears. It was q portrait Of his father,
Colonel Simpkins, who had four times
been promoted for valor during the
Civil War and had died bravely on the
field OF action. Mr.. Simpklns' throat
ached now for two reasons: First, he
reverenced and adored the memory Of
Ills father; secondly, his age and his
eyes and his game leg wouldn't let him
20 to wGr himself. And as he observed
the martial bearing and uncompromis.
ing gaze OF Colonel Simpkins he saw,
IN tmagtnat ton. the KHAKI. Rad lads Of
the new generation marching forth and
crossing three thousand miles Of sea to
light, maybe die, for liberty. =s:l-z.
Mr.. Simpkins peered around to make
sure that neither Bess nor John (who
were at the teasing ages Of sixteen
and seventeen) were where they could
see him, then he Strengthened and
threw his right arm up for a salute.
Buthi equity shoulder twinged, and he
groaned. he couldn't even salute. -"
Damn I" said Mr.. Simpkins, and
with his other hand fiercely twtrled his
white mustachios. = >'~.,,, ~
he turned and iimped into the IL
brary and sat down creakily before the
mahogany desk on which were living
the blanks for his income tax stater
ment, blanks which he had rather
grumpily got from the Internal Reve.
nue. officer only that day after lunch.
con on his way home from the club. r
Mr.. Sfmpkins' income for 1917 had
amounted to just about s15, 900, and he
had been rather snappy on the SUBJ
ject OF taxes ever since he had discov.
cred that the more income a man has
the greater the percentage Of it he
pays In taxes. He could think Of sew
eral men who. like himself, were mar
ried and had two children. and yet,
although their incomes were nearly
half OF his, they would pay only
small fraction of the amount he paid.
He gloomily drew the blank nearer
and began filling in the information
that It asked for. ~
AS Mr.. Simpkins' income was SIS, 600
he had to figure out the amounts pay
able on each of the successive smaller
classes OF incomes In order to arrive
at the total due from himself. He
passed over the first class who must
pay taxes, that Is, single men making
over 1000. His calculation for mar.
ried men then showed up as follows:
First, they. pay 2 per cent. (under
the 1915 law on all income over
$4,000, deducting 5000 for each of their
children under eighteen years. In Mr..
Simpkins' case this was 1912, which he
put down in the payable" column.
He saw next that, under the 1917
law, married men pay an additional 2
per cent. on all over $2,OOO-with the
same allowance for children. This
added 1852 to his payable" column.
He then observed that for every
$4,000 jump In his income over $1,000
he had to pay Surtax, the percentage
growing larger with each Jump. This
was $3.50 more added to his burden.
And on top of all this came an "Ex-
cess Profits tax of per cent. on, all
"occupa ton" income over $4,000, max
ing $720 more.
The total, then, he must pay was four
teen hundred and thirty-four dollars.
"Whew !" exclaimed Mr.. Simpkins
angrily "There's young Henry Will
kins, who married Jake Johnson's girl, |
he makes $1,000 and he doesn't pay a
cent. Of taxes. l guess this is his war
as we'll as miner ,.... -. w..
Thinking of young Henry wilkins.
he remembered that Mrs. wilkins went
every afternoon to make bandages for
the Red Cross and that Henry, who
was a lawyer. was aiding the Local
Draft Board with It's uuestionnafres.
SWELL" he admitted to himself,
THAT makes a difference"
He thought next of Judge Willough.
by, whose income was about $1,000.
HE only pays $780," commented Mr.:
not quite so angrily this
time; and then thought struck him
and he sat up rigldly in his chair.
Judge Willoughby's son had been
drowned on the Tuscania when it was
with the loss of two hun
bred soldiers Il
Judge Willoughby gave his son to
muttered Mr.. Simpkins.
He leaned forward suddenly and put
his face In his hands. g. : II
For long time Mr.. Simpkins sat
very still In that position. There was
40 sound in the library except the
licking of the tall clock and an occa-
sional trill of laughter from the chill
1ren skylarking upstairs. The square
II light on the carpet gradually with
1rew itself through the window, and
1rst twilight and then darkness settled
n about the quiet, white haired, some
lines frascible old man.
Mr.. Simpkins was thinking things
which he would never afterward speak
II, he was thinking things that were
90 sacred ever to be put into words.
But some inkling Of his thoughts may
,e found In his rejoinder to Mrs.
simpkins when that placid lady came
n and turned on the lights, and asked ],
lin whether he was ready for dinner.
Judge Willoughby's only son was
worth as much as fourteen hundred
md thirty-four dollars, wasn't hep.
dr. Simpkins demanded OF her.
As his wife, who was not unused to
lis superficial frrftatiOns w1fphpd him
a mild astonishment, Mr.. Simpkins