Iron County news. [volume] (Hurley, Wis.) 1913-1950, 1918-05-11
Indeed a
Cheerful
Tc1e
Copyright, Frank A Munsey Coz

my life.
Mrs. Green. Lucile's mother was pa
tiently cheerful and drank three glasses
of water like a sponge. l didn't care
much for mine. had previously had no
idea that water was so fat and taste
less. 1t is also an extraordinarily elus-
i've and clammy thing to put into an
empty stomach which is eagerly ex-
pecting bacon and eggs, mullins and
coffee.
Il feel better already" Lucille said
gayly as we left the table. My mind
is clear-I have wasted none of my
vital energy in merely digesting food"
l knew that she was quoting Upton
S. Clair, whom | was beginning to re-
gard with disfavor. to say the least,
but l refrained from voicing my opin-
ion of a man who win help women to
get even more fool ideas than they can
think up by themselves.
l took q cigar from my pocket. cut
the tip off carefully with a silver cut
ter Lucille had given me the previous
Christmas and was about to light 1t
when she stopped me.
mo. no, no; you mustn't. Did for
get TO tell you that while We are fast
ing we have to give up ali stimulants
and narcotics. such as alcohol and to-
bacco"
"What-cut out smoking for d week 2'
Certainly" she replied firmly. ''In
the first place, if you don't you will be
deathly i'll; in the second place. the
whole object of the fast is to rid the
body of all toxic poisons, such as nico-
tine, alcohol and so forth. BY the time
you have done without tobacco for a
week l should not be surprised il you
never smoked again"
Nor me either" I reflected gloomy
out loud. III be dead"
"Of course IL you don't care to make
the experiment" Lucille said Jelly, "I'f
put off the fasting for another week
until Frank Bopp is here. I'm sure he
will be willing TO Try it,
This was waving a red flag at me.
/ Frank BOpp was ray rival. After her
reference to him l would have gone
without breathing for week If she
had suggested it. Bopp is a thin, con-
versational insect who can perch on
/ the arm of girls chair and chirp by
the hour. Sometimes | regret that for
architectural and educational reasons
] can't do that, and then | remember
what other men would think OF me If
| could, and | am solaced. ! refrain
from saying what l think of the mama
"Bopp."
Thus through my love and Jealousy |
was led into deeper water or, shall |
say, more water because somebody
hended me glass OF the stuff every
few minutes. / drank it In the vain
hope that l could drown the inner
man, who seemed to be yelling for
help all the time and kicking me just
below the belt buckle when he didn't
get it,
That morning we went for a walk
Walking is the best exercise in the
world" Lucille stated 1T is excellent
for reducing surplus flesh around the
abdominal region"
InvariRbly she had little stinger for
me concealed in any remark she might
make. ! have since learned that this
is sign that a woman takes a proprie-
tary interest in man.
Before we went she fed Tootles. her
/ long haired pup. TOOtles is one Of those
dogs so constructed by nature that
when you want to look them in the face
you don't know where to look. often
wonder If Tootles herself isn't In doubt
as to which end to wag.
Isn't Tootlcs going to fast. too?"
protested. Cant she stand 1t as we'll
as / CAM"
Possibly she could do It," Lucille
said as she gave her a dog biscuit,
but she hasn't intelligence enough to
understand why she should go without
food"
I'm not far above Tootles in intelli-
gence. then" l remarked, but under my
breath this time, so she could not hear.
After watching Tootles eat we went
walking. Whenever 1 go walking IN
the city l hire a taxicab. IL ! want to
see nature in all her grandeur do | 20
tramping through the woods? / do
not. / buy seat at moving picture
show where they are running a west.
ern outlaw film. Mature for nickel"
is my motto. Fatigue is eliminated,
and the sum total of knowledge is ad-
vanced several thousand feet.
After we had covered several miles,
as it seemed 10 me, l suggested that
we had better not 30 much farther
away from home.
Why not?' Lucille queried.
1--WE might not get back in time for
lunch"
Il brought our lunch" she said and
produced a flask of water.
tTO BE CONTINI ED