Arizona republican., 1918-07-14
For Sale-Miscellaneous

CRAWLS-REASON.
 The lurid experiences of a human often are better untold, but following the injunction of Sister Sophia, who at every revival shouts, Tell the truth, sister, for it shames the Devil, and does your soul good,' I'm going to make my Spiel" Humanity gives no credence to quadruped reason, deem- ing all motions, or acts, as instinctive You're off your base. This'll prove it! 1 shall write of the louSe; pray, my sister, don't shudder. for since Burns saw that one in church crawl OCT the Misss "lunardi," another has never at tempted it, his ignominious fate hav- ing warned all others. You do not know it, but louse is the sweetest of all insects, the truth of which a mon- key or Digger Indian will testify. I have sat for hours watching the Cal Indian pick from the juvenile scalp the dainty morsels, never for the mo- ment dreaming that intellect was being murdered, but at the crack of each sacrificed martyr my exclama- tions of "Ah!-Oh!" truly indicated near readiness to join in the feast, and 1 gut OCT the dainties. My frously head and friZZly hair afforded rare pasture to hordes of its denizens, who, at times, when rampageous, in all similarity to humans-Gmages of their maker) would "burrough, bite and bit while during my restful hours, they seemed to flight, fought and fit Mother finally bought me that jewel in all households, a fine -toothed comb, having in mind the one thought, eXter- imitation. But her son, with his ever productive brain, had conjured far diff | I tp music-All boys know how to produce comb music; then scientific study, to satisfy myself whether a louse is ever satiated to that point where his | lengthy prod ceases to work. Then | intellect" of which now 1 can assure you. Standing before the glass, after | having raked a multitude on the mouth organ, l struck up that patri- otic strain, Worded, If you love me as I love you," etc, and, would you believe it. every cussed member immediately enthused and began to caper, reel and rolic with each other, regardless of sex or heartless brothers. In joy they pranced, in stunts did battle, like caged rats or crazy cattle. It might have been cotillion strides, or modest quirps of bonny brides. but turns and jig and innovations, I never viewed, as tripped this nation. l want no inSinuations regarding my sanity; you can call it fantasy, or delusion, or attribute these lousy antics to vibrations of my harp sichord, but adjure you, with all your opportunities (the louse family is still prolific) to test this theory, but l warn you not to substitute juvenile maidenly piano music, for the mouth organ" for one dash at that, by classical young 1ad tn c den as instinctively as it causes me to rush for cotton batting to wad mine ears.
 There are times when you must sell goods.
 Money makes the mare go."
 How about the "Hoss"? 100 Refrigerators left.-Price 'em.
 Just in-Car load Cheap Chairs.
 Electric Fans-Plenty left
 Humidity-Sprays for Electric Fans
 Typewriters: a bushel.
 1 cheap Cash Register.
 1 large steel safe.
 medium steel safe.
 Automatic Counter Scale.
 Meat Slicer and Cheese Cutters.
 All sizes sausage grinders.
 Meat and Vegetable Grinders.
 Lots of Tools.
 |
 Electric Carpet Sweepers.
 elegant Victrolas, cost $60 %; price s40.00; new.
 Some New Conn Cornets.
 Banjos-Guitars-
 Caps for fruit jars, 15c dog.
 Plenty of Fruit Jars.
 Lot of water pipe.
 finch iron tube posts.
 Lots Wire carrying Iron Posts. Big lot Window sash: good. Some doors.
 Sett lattice folding sanitary doors. Hand Printing Press and Type.
 Lots of Clocks and Pictures.
 Fine lots of Books All sizes Office Desks. Large Asst of Tents. : Nice Lot mems clothes. Beds and Bedding,-all Kinds. Trunks and Grips, new or old. Rugs;-Anything you want.
 Oil or Gas Stoves. Ranges galore, all sizes. : Mine Blowers, large or small. Motors for sew, or other machines
 Elegant office and Parlour tables. <, A large asst Baby Buggies. New Mattresses. at bargains.
 2nd Hand Mattress, cheap. Pillows Very Cheap. Immense Stock Beds and Cots.
 Some fine Navajo Rugs.
 Guns, Pistols and Cartridges.
 Harness saddles, and collars. l We have a department, No. IA [ . Adams where nothing but new furni 9 ture is sold:-Installments if desired |, Country trade is solicited. I vii K ship goods free when amount justi t fies.
 Don't you think I am interested il a Glendale store, as has been removed r Il own no store outside of Phoenix. l I am moved to the old Boston Store l 22O E. Wash. and prepared to buy an n saleable goods for spot cash, and pa 1 full value.
 . Phone 1776. 7. FORDS STORES
 22O and 222 E. Wash St. |