The Washington herald., 1918-05-10
Is Self Conceit an Asset?
By DOROTHY DIX,
THE WORLDS HIGHEST PAID WOMAN WRITER

II don't know whether to foster
my children's self-conceit or try to
curb it," said a mother to me the
other day. because I've never been
able to decide whether egotism Is
a help or a hindrance to US in life.
"Of course we are all taught that
vanity Is one OF the seven deadly
sins and meekness is one of the car
dinal virtues, but all the same, OBJ
servation shows US that vanity Is
the first aid to getting there, and
meekness invariably gets left at the
post. Most Of our great men. from
Napoleon to Col. Roosevelt. up and
down, have been an incarnate /.
ALSO We are forced to observe that
there Is no other such unfailing
source OF contentment and happiness
as self-conceit. II you admire yourself
enough II doesn't make a particle
Of difference whether other people
admire you or not. Their criticism
rolls OF of you like water OF Of a
ducks back. II they don't think you
the handsomest creature in the
world you simply set 1t down to their
lack of appreciation. II they don't
admire your work, they are merely
lacking in taste. II they refuse to
let you lay down the law TO them,
or to kow-tow before your opinions.
they are a generation of fools and
asses, no less.
You go undisturbed on your way,
serene in the unshakabIe faith that
anyone who has any intelligence. ar
tistic sense or Judgment sees you as
you see yourself
There are times when I see old
women adorned in the raiment of
ffsppers, and ugly, fat. ungainly wom-
en- rolling their eyes at men. and
trying to look cute and coquettish.
and when I writhe under the tor
ture OF being bored to extinction by
platitudinous gentlemen who tell me
jokes that heard in the cradle, and
monologue along by the hour about
themselves and their own affairs,
under the conviction that must
find them thrillingly interesting be-
cause they are so interested in them
selves. then I am led to the convic-
tion that self-conceit Is Gods conso-
iation prize to his stepchildren.
For IL you will notice. as a gen.
eral thing. the less reason people have
TO be conceited the more conceited
they are. The vainest women I have
ever met in my life have not been
living pictures. but chromos. and the
men who talk most about themselves
are the men who have never done
anything worth mentioning.
SO when you look at vanity in this
llght-that Of something that merci-
fully camoufiages ones own defects
and shortcomings from ones own
sight and leaves one purring with
self-satisfaction instead of railing at
fate-it seems the cruelest thing in the
world to deprive a child of it.
You feel like saying to your young
ones. 60 to it. my child. Think well
Of yourself, because precious few other
people will. Cultivate a good opinion
OF yourself. then 1t won't make any
dinerence whether you get the glad
hand from the world or not. Wrap
yourself up in as many of the chif-
ions of pink illusions about your own
looks and talents as you can manu.
facture out of your vanity, for they
are more impervious to the slings and
arrows Of outrageous fortune than a
coat of mail would be.
Il speak with feeling on the SUBJ
ject. because I had a mother who be-
longed to the old school that held IL
was a parents first duty to raise up a
child to be humble. and to nip in the
bud every sprout Of vanity that might
show itself in the little ones character,
Therefore. had all of my faults
and shortcomings kept religiously be-
fore my eyes. was told continually
that 1 was a dark, ugly little thing.
and that was awkward and in every
body's way. Children exaggerate
everything and the result of my moth
ers homilies on my looks was ia
make me believe was repulsiye in
appearance and blunderer unfit for
polite society.
The tears have shed, the ago.
nies have suffered over INV lack
of attractiveness no one can even
imagine. grew morbid on The
subject, and to this day; even when
am middle-aged, 1t embarrasses me
to death to find anyone looking
steadily at me. Ny mind files hack
70 my mothers early teaching and
l think that they are looking at me
as at something grotesque.
And the cynical part of IL is
that all OF this suffering. and shame
ana humiliation was for nothing i
really wasn't an ugly girl at all. j
was quite as good looking as the
average, and I only needed the
stimulus Of vanity to have made me
a pretty girl.
fhere are women who carry
themselves SO per cent above their
looks and other women who carry
themselves 75 per cent below their
looks. belonged to the latter
class. for in destroying my vanity
my mother had made me shy, and
deprecating and self-conscious. So
1 went about with my shoulders
slouched over. and my head hang
Ing down. and wore my good clothes
as Il they were rags and pasted my
self up against the wall, q fore
doomed faiIara In sociafx ,,x,fil