The Richmond Virginian. (Richmond, Va.) 1910-1920, 1918-07-05
GERMAN ARMY LIKE
THE ONE-HOSS SHAY
When Hun Collapse Comes, Entire
German Power VIII Melt In Day,
Like Famous Cart.


France, July tim sick o. the .'ols
bIoomin' business" said Spudhole, the
Cockney soldier. gloomiiy, MS he clam
orsd up on the drestep and looked at
the German trenches which showed on
the other side of no mans land. Bone
tired / am o the ole damned caboodle;'
o. the pip saueaks, the nine point aves,
the minnies, the whizZ- bangs and all
the rest o II. When Is 1t goin' to eud7
Is this war ever Roin' to end? Can
you answer that question, Gahey. you
red-headed. big. hulkln' freshman. can
you answer that question:"
Gahey. red headed and Irish. rose
from his seat Ola the hrestep. stepped
into the slushy trench and lit his pipe.
In the dumps again. me boy?" he
inquired, looking at Spudhole- ITS
always on the wet day that ye're
grumblin' and feelin' sick Nv the Job.
And it's not IN me to blame ye. for 1t
has been rainin' cats and dogs and
kettle drums ever since stand-to this
morning. Glory bel but it's weather
that's fit to chilli the heart Nv an angel"
End Ssuse Day.
90 was talkin' about angels?"
Spudhole exploded Not me. for all
that I wanted ter know was when this
bloomin' war was goin to end an let
me back ter Blighty for good. Dye
think that las ever goin ter end.
Gahey?"
"Ah. it'll end one fine day. me boy"
said Gahey "It'l1 come to an end all
in a heap. like--the One Horse Shay"
The wetT' spudhoie exclaimed.
Are yer tryin' ter pull my bloomin'
leg, Gaheyr"
Tn not pullsn' yer leg. We limb"
said Gahey. I'm just teilin' ye about
the OneHorse shay. There was poethry
made about IL and / read IL when I
was a cub in the National school ~
Bali yrudden, me own town-land. I
mtsrem EN- bsr the word Nv it, but I've
still got the lie iv that pone in me
head. This one-Horse Shay was built
be a man in the old times"
A One-Hcrsc Shay.
But wot ts blooufn' one-'oss
shay" Spudhole inquired
Yes. what Is it?" said Gahey TITS
this. It's sort of cross-b breed between
tank and A donkey cart. It's glorfw'
Gus vehicle that man or woman
can go to church or u market In. It's,
In short. sort iv 5auntin' car. And
this enc that the porne speaks about
was an exceptional one. the best in the
four corners Nv the country. The man
that made 1t. bein' KNOWN fellow
with more In his head than comb
could take out, saw by his own OBJ
servatious that all sorts iv vehicles
came to sudden end. because one part
Nv them was worse than the others,
and this part when it gave out put all
the rest in the vehicle out iv gear.
For example, a cart may be all
right in its body, but the shafts are
Il bit wake and when the shafts go
that cart Is c. Immediately. So the
spokes Nv a wheel may be all right, but
they're NO good If the axle Is faulty.
Well. this man In the porne. he studied
these things and took it into his head
to make a One-Horse Shay with every
one part iv 1t just as good as any
other part. He started on the maxim
iv one at once. for he had no book Nv
regulations to hold him back and
everything about the shay that he
made was perfect. The rims w the
wheels were as strong as the spokes,
the spokes were as good rs the Inch
pin. the Inch pin was on an equal
footin' with the axle and the axle was
as strong as the body above it. The
same with the tail board. the shafts
and the breechin' hooks. Glory be.
when 1t was finished that One Horse
Shay was a delight and wonder to
behold. II was the best ever seen in
the country before or since. And
when it got to work II was good to
sit in 1t and get driv about In It to
church or market
A Long Life.
"A long life 1t had and many q
sound pony 1t outlived as well as the
man that fashioned 1t and the son Nv
that same man and others OF whom
rye forgotten all tally. And the true
length Of its days was one day added
to a hundred years. Then 1t went
west in a very funny way. The man
who owned It. the great grandson Nv
the man that made II I think he was,
was goin' to church one day on top tv
the shay when all of a sudden 1t dis