davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
La prensa. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1913-1962, 1918-07-05
FERROcARRLER0S


Va e tempo de poner en- prac-
iica las n0bicS aSpiraciO0eS cue To-
do bucn ncxicanO hg tcuidO STEM
pre-, de i~nS:ruirSc Sabiamcnte en- 10
eoncerniea;e Z SuS differences la-
bereS-
Los LiSroS que former la "8l-
RLiaTECA DEL FERROCARiLEHo
gEylCAN0" Ia i2eititaTsn Icda H.
formeci6a que sc ~relaeiene con Su
trahaio-
ahera sc oi-eeen al Gremio Ne
eanieo, los primeroS HIRES La
Locomotora Hs:iet Compound Art-
cu,ada.- Eel Compressor de Are
cuwpogni''. ES.9S Sc mandarin u
ezasg8ler parie &. Mexico o de les
Estados JniuaS, sI rccih0 DE- giro
sesial De Sis, por caGa uuo. mo-
media americana, o sill equi'aieate
en- Moueda MrNicana. hb-e de porte
Reeor:e este enuEciO ahori uiiSmo.
uSaqalc en- sabre con su E@mb-e '
direction Y manG"io u CARLOS IL
aCEyEDO, p. o. 2oN -, iptio, ca,
U. 6. A.. ' = yuelta e CorreO re-
cisira ;aIieto = io:ogrsfisS intere-
san;es.
La prensa. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1913-1962, 1918-07-05

MEXICO, D. F. JUNO 3O.-un eS-
pantoso drama ~ocasionadc por la MI
seria mas negra Sc desarrollo Aye en-
ia entrada del Bosque &c Chapulte-
pee. en- los precisos .momentos en- que
una multiud allegro Sc dirigia a nues-
tro hist6rico parQue en- autos y en- CO.
ches. para disfrutar de Ia hermosura
de una manana prin,averal de las mas
bellas.
Junto al enrejado del bosque, por Ia
parte de afuera. caminaban con rum
DO a Mexico Una sonora va entrada en-
mos Y IN cabaliero viejo tambi6n, am
Dos humiide pero limpiamente vesti-
dos. en- cuyo aspecto genera! sc adivi-
naba una miseria sOmbria Y terrible.
Ambos caminaban ~Silenciosos Y Ell
caballero 10 hacia con Ia vista clavada
en- el suelo, como entregado I cristes
peasamientoS.
La prensa. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1913-1962, 1918-07-05
C0MiSIONADO DEL CONDADO.

IA PRENSA," esta autorizada
para anumciar al senior Jacobo Rubio-
Ia, como candidate al puesto de Co.
mlsionado de; Condado, por el Distri-
20 r0mero uro. sujeto a las eleccio-
mes 2rimario-democraticas que deve-
ran verificarse el - de Julio de 1918.
political Adv
La prensa. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1913-1962, 1918-07-05
In Ia ultima miseria.

Mlentras tauso. todo 10 de valor
que en- Ia casa del pobre professor
existia, fuc yendo a parar p~aulatina-
mente a los cmpenos, hasta que lego
un Ola en- CUE en- aquel hogan TO ha-
bia NADIA empehabIe. mi un pedazo
de pan que Sc pudieran los esposOs
Torres llevar a ia bcca.
EntonceS, en- eI cerebro eufermo Y
debll del professor surgio la idea de
Ia maerte. Todo era preferable a la
prolongacion de aquclla espantosa ST.
t~uacion; Y pensandolo asi. ci senior
Torres manifesto a 81 compahera de
miSeriaS y anlarEuras Il intenciones
de venrr d esta capital a echar mano
del ultimo recurso".
Ago terrible presintio la buena Sc
nora, pues Sc cpuso con toda insis-
tsnc!a 4 qQe el professor -ealizata csc
La prensa. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1913-1962, 1918-07-05
Poclamaron va
Ia .,ueUa ley
electoral
Castro, general car
rancista, ha sido retira-
do del ejercito

MEXICO, D. F. JUNO SO.-Aana-
ma por Ia manana sera promulgada
en- esta capital Ia nueva Ley Electo-
raj que fu6 aprobada pcr ell Con-
greso de Ia Union, Y tai prociama-
ci6n Sc hara por bando solemne.
Sc formara una gran columna
minitar u sera presidida por el
Gobernador del Distrito, Ia cue re-
.rre~a las principales Gale de Ia ciu-
dad. asistiendo q la ~fijacion de los
decretos impreso Ell donde Sc decla-
"a en- vigor la ley .mencionada.
Fus robada una csntriea sombrereria
Doscientos noventa Y caatro SOM
braros firos de marca "Stetson' Y
Iauarento V cuatro "panamas" fueron
rohad9S aver de una sombereria lla-
Imada la Madrilena.' que Sc en-
'~cuenrra situada en- Ia avenida del IS
de Sophomore, Y ell autor de tai ha-
'zana parece haber sido IN indivl-
duo de nombre Maxine Rosete, quien
dos . tres dias antes Sc habia hos
~edaGo N una casa de huespedes
coatigua 4 Ia citada Sombrereria Y
sue comunica con esta por 81 patio
interior.
Antier q ESQ de las Siete de Ia no.
che. Rosete Sc presento en- la casa
de hl6spedes Y anunci6 a Ia patro-
NJ que eSa misma noche saldria
para Chapala. por 10 que mas tarde
Ivendria por su equipaje a su cuar-
70.
En- efecto, q las once de Ia 2oche
Sc presento en- Ia ASA de huespe-
des; Ell portero lie abri6, pues va 10
conocia como chente, Y entonces Ell
"alero penetro a una imprenta que
nay en- la miSma casa, f~racturando
a puerta: de ALI. rompiendo un ira
agluz. pcnetro en- la s~ombrereria, Y
..Gc@o puso el producto del robo en-
dos granGes munGos que tambien sa-
co &c la misma casa, Saliendo cor
todo su "equipaje" a la vista del
portero, quien 10 dej5 salir sin la
meHos Gesconfianza.
La pclicia anda tras de Ia pista
del habiI rata.
La prensa. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1913-1962, 1918-07-05
ChN.sE.

LaSi.SEs
Cstsio5e de daasS u~eIleaaas J ot-as
nartuRaliLaacs Szlessa liSia Dc 2erLn9-
SOS soEabrrS.
MaRte IN DOLLAR ' &c enEiaremo5 =
yue!.a lie corFcc. nueS.TV complete. Ia
tSlodu Matrimonial. ccE d~e>c-i?eiOneS
completes, de nuchSS i~0Eeres ' algr-
mas yludGS, que bUScaI = u Usrid0
b.ero V hcaFad0. Pueie listed eScEi9ir
q cuzf8uiera de elias y cOnirasr IN fe-
liz msirim0nio en- muy oreye TEMPO
NoSoircs, pOr nueStTs Parte som1s per-
So1as ~recomeaGs5leS, RueStro Esgocio
esth baSado sObre Ia h0RraGcI ' leqil-
miaad: ash IS que no dele que Ia peque-
ia cantidad de IN DOLLAR >lryc &c eS-
iorAo cl uua probable FELiCiDAD IA
TgiSUNLt[- ESGSIhR hoy atSHnS Z:
COSMR9OLTTAN CORRESPONDENCE
?. g. Eoa iS- Nesirc, Cal
La prensa. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1913-1962, 1918-07-05
Castro ab2ndona Ell Ejercito.

CeSareo Castro. Jefe de las opera
clones en- los Estados de Pueblo Y
T!axcala. pidi5 a la superioridad una
~!icencja de dos meSeS para s~epararse
De! servicjo militar, para atender =
sus i2tereses que Sc haiian en- e
EStado de Coahuila.
En- los circulos nilitares Sc CO.
menta en- varias formas esta licen-
ga soiicitada por el referido gene
raj. no faltando quien asegure que
no Sc trata de tai licencia, Sino de
"ceSe" que IA Secretaria de Guerra
az dictado en- contra de Castro. qlien
hace algu2os dias pidio la separa-
ci0n de seis generates del ~servicio
militar, entire los que estaba corsi-
dorado el general Cabrera, autor de
los asesinatos de los generates No
"ca ' Elizondo.
Sc cree que Castro Sc separara
aC Serv,eio cen '25eGci0n de no VOL
vcr : =. ro~ no haber. side atenGido
SIS Recommendations en- eli sentido del
&c aigunoS miii.ares de alta
graduation.
No * page d los empieados
+! Tescrero Genera! de ia Nacion
declare h0y . medic dia. que por mo-
two Dc fucrza mayor no Sc cubriran
los SGeldoS de los e~mpleados fedora
les hoy. que es final de mes Y dece-
IA. sine Que los pages Sc comenza-
ran a hacer q medi&doS de Il soma
ia e~Gtraare.
La prensa. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1913-1962, 1918-07-05

Cuaadn neCC5;.e ii3Tos en- espah0l,
d~iriiase Il IgEacio Z. Lozanc. l1S n.
Santa Rosa ave. San hn:onip. Tczaz.
La prensa. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1913-1962, 1918-07-05

iATENCI0N, iATENCION.
fA-NES-

fAlENS1DN-
\ CA>NitS5
CaIaiOCO &c GaiuaS T"Ni"a-aS : OtrdS
aaciona,iJEdeS : eAienSa iiS;a lie her
mOSOS UOmugeS.
E~nvienoS IN Dollar SOllmente = nos
ot-OS le reniti-eEs0S. = Vu"lIa O. &c
rrao. aues;ru complete CaIaio-1 mIirl-
monlai con C~esr'l.ciCneS Get2l,a&aS. FJ-
TDGRAFIAS. NUMBRE> y DIRECCIO-
NES de j6yeaeS. SehOraS ' ScNOrIiaS
mexiCanaS Y G" O,gdS nICIuEai!tsceS, Il
zanas viuEzS 3e lI'icGan!r> an,-ceGeu-
tcS qUtcGs- cs>eaG ci.rgC.:UT IN aouTa-
DC Y 3GrG e>,nSp. u. rHrde e>c1iDlT-
lie Entertainments . Cga:.,gisgI Ge elias
y contraeT IN sGG.clmunjC iellZ en- cor
20 fieInpO. SoMCS tig1pS dc cCnTianZa
J nos deLIcGElgS ! u HegOcsO Ecu-auo
V iicitO. No pcTui.ia, uu2s, cue Ia pc
CCe12 Suma q" IN dollar es:a dc por
medic entire I'd ! - mUy possible FE
LIGEDAD MATRIMONIAL.
EScTi3a hoy RiSElo 4:
RELIANCE GLIB
Go1 $40. ... ID. los Angeles, Cal.
La prensa. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1913-1962, 1918-07-05
reyisan a t0d0s
los p~asajeros los
equipajes
LA POLICIA DICE QUE TR4TA DE
EVITARSE QUE Sc ENVlEN
ARMAS 4 LOS RE-
BELDES

MEXICO. JUNO 30.-A pesar de
las muckas q@eias que por dlstlnros
conductos han llegado a Ia lnspec-
ci6n General de Policia references
a los abuses que cor los ~pasaJeros
com ten en- Ids estaciones del fe-
r~rocarril los encargados de revisar
los equipajcs. Ia citada oficina del
gobicrno insiste en- que Ia revision
de e~quipajes q todos los viajeros sc
debe ssguir 2oniendo en- practica,
pues opina ell Inspector de Policla
:g1e antes que TODD esta la Tranquil
!idad de Ia R~epublica, Y que de esa
revision que SC esta hacienda con
toda escrupulosidad depende en- gran
partc cl que la pacificaci6n sc pue-
da llevar a efecto en- el pals, va que
los rebeldes Sc veran muy pronto
imposibiIitaios de recibir parque Y
armas por los conductos rc!ativamen
lie faciles que hasta hoy les haoian
servido para surtirse de elementos.
La prensa. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1913-1962, 1918-07-05
Victima de Ia miseria, ur1 viiejo maestro de
escuela Sc priv6 q de Ia vida
Desesperado de La triste condici6n q que Sc
hallabba reducido, mientras paseaba por jun
to al Bosque Sc arroj6 debajo de las
ruedcs de un trea e~Iectrieo

viaje. V en- vista de que nc podia con-
vencerlo con razones, Sc decide a a
companar!o. hacienda u 81 lado el via
je tristemente, los dos callados, los
dos e~ntregados 4 los mas amargoS
pensamientos.
En- dos o tres oportunidades, duran
ce Ell viaje. el senior Torres habia in
tentado arrojarse a Ia via de los tran
vias en- los momentos en- que pasaba
uno de estes, pero Ia sonora 10 habia
impedido con tinanicos esfuerzos. has
ta que, aparentemente ca!mado, el
professor sigui6 su viaje tranqui!amea-
te. por 10 cue IA sonora crey6 que
Ia idea de suicidarse Sc habia ALICIA
do de su pobre cerebro.
{! momcnto terrible.
Como qued0 d:cho, cerca de la puer-
ia principal del bosque de Chapulte-
pee. Ell los momentos en- que IN tren
de San Angel pasaba . ;oda ve.ocid2d,
q senior Torres arrojo lejos de
81 a la sonora que le acompaEGba, y
Sc .arroj0 soDrc los %rieles, siendo mucr
70 instantanea y te~rriblemelte.
FL cadaver del Unfortunate profe-
sor fue rscogido por las autorida-
des, y Ia viuda, en- eStado inconscicn-
te, fue Nevada q un puesto de 5000
rios en- donde Ell mGdico de guardia
declare que 10 primcro que lie hacia
f2lta 4 l. pobrc sehora, era tomar
algUn alimento, pucs estaba material
me2te muriGndose &c hambrc... -.
Este e;pantosG drama de miseria y
descsperacion ha consternaLo a ia So
ciedad de Mexico.
La prensa. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1913-1962, 1918-07-05
Sc arrojo sobre la Via.

De prolto, cuando in r c dc San
Angel Sc acercaba a toda ~velocldad, e!
anciano a~rojo violentamente de I'm
ampeli6n q la sonora sobre el enreJado
del hosque, y Sc arrojo 4 Ia via de los
trenes. siendo arrollado cor las rue
das del vehiculo y decapitaCo compile
samente, pues su cabeza fue d OAR
a IN metro de Ia via, en- tanto CUE Ell
cuerpo quedaba cnmedio de los rie!es
CambiGa horr;blcmcnte tr;turado. Las
ruedas de la derecha del CAIRO lie ha-
bian pas2do precisamcnte por el cue
10, produciandole una mucrte que de-
bio ser instaHtanea.
La sonora Sc lanZo Embellishments
81 seguimiento del caballero, que era
81 esposo. pero "a 10 hizO tarde, pueS
Ell caro- habia daGo lin con la vida del
infortu2ado anciano'
La prensa. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1913-1962, 1918-07-05
Sc castigaran los abuses

Por 10 que respecta a los abuses
que sc dice cometen los e%mpleados
V hasta los destac&mentos encar-
gados de las revisiones dc los equi-
pajes en- las estaciones dc las pobla-
cioE2S reqleFaS, Ia Inspection de
Pclicia declare que Sc tendran en-
cuenta les Quejas que sean presen-
tadas sobra este particular por los
yiajeroS, sjemnre que vengan justl-
ficadas, y que los responsableS de
tales faltaS scrin sacramento cas-
iigadOs.
La prensa. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1913-1962, 1918-07-05

Sc cr,e ;nGEl Ia Media.
\ pe<ar del empeno que las au-
ioridades han puesto ! s!guen po-
T2sl I Ia ga. rag. Col 5a-)
The Hope pioneer., 1918-12-26

a food map OF Europe today shows
not single country in which the fu-
ture does not hold threat Of serious
difficulties and only small part which
is not rapidly approaching the famine
point. With the exception Of the
Ukraine only those countries which
have maintained marine commerce
have sufficient food supplies to meet
actual needs until next harvest, and
even in the Ukraine, with stores accu-
mulated on the farms, there is famine
in the large centers of population.
Belgium and northern France, as
we'll as Serbia, appear on the hunger
map distinct from the rest of Europe
because they stand in different rela.
tion from the other nations to the peo.
pie of the United States. America has
for four years maintained the small
war rations Of Belgium and northern
France and is already making special
efforts to care for their increased
after-the-war needs, which, with those
of Serbia, must be included in this
plan, are urgent in the extreme and
must have immediate relief.
The gratitude Of the Belgian nation
for the help America has extended tt
her during the war constitutes the
strongest appeal for us to continue oul
work there. The moment the German
armies withdrew from her soil and she
was established once more in her OWL
The Hope pioneer., 1918-12-26

seat or government the little nation s
first thought was to express her graft
tude to the Commission for Relief IN
Belgium for preserving the lives of
millions of her citizens.
Germany, on the other hand, need
not figure in such map for Ameri-
cans because there is no present in1i-
cation that we shall be called on at all
to take thought for the food needs of
Germany. Germany probably can care
for her own food problem If she is
given access to shipping and is enabled
to distribute food to the cities with
dense populations, which are the trou.
BILE centers.
England, France, the Netherlands
and Portugal, all Of which have been
maintained from American supplies
have sufficient food to meet immediate
needs, but their future presents seri
Gus difficulties. The same is true OF
Spain and the northern neutral coun
tries-Norway, Sweden and Denmark
whose ports have been open and who
have been able to draw to some degre,
upon foreign supplies.
Most Of Russia is already in the
throes Of famine, and 100000 people
there are beyond the possibility o.
help. Before another spring thou
sands of them inevitably must die
This applies as well to Poland ant
practically throughout the Baltic re
The Hope pioneer., 1918-12-26
NOTICE OF HEARING PETITION FOR
LICENSE TO SELL REAL ESTATE

State of North Dakota, County of
Steele.
In County Court. Before Hon. Adam S.
Moote, Judge.
In the Mater of the Estate Of Florence
Tucker, Deceased.
George Murray, Petitioner,
Samuel c. Tucker, Marion Tucker,
Claude Tucker, Greed Tucker, and
r. A. Lathrop as Guardian Of the
Estates of Claude Tucker and Greed
Tucker, Minor heirs of Florence
Tucker, deceased, Respondents.
The State of North Dakota to the
above named Respondents and ell
persons interested in the Estate Of
Florence Tucker, Deceased.
You, and each of you, are hereby
notified that the petition Of George
Murray, Administrator of the Estate
Champaign, County of Champaign and
State Of Illinois, deceased, has been
filed in this Court, therein petitioning
that he be authorized. empowered and
directed to sell all the real estate be-
longing to said decedent's estate, des-
cribed as follows, to-wit:
An undivided one-fourth (A) inter-
est Of, in and to the Southwest quar-
ter lsWA) Of Section thirty-two (32).
West Of the Fifth Principal Meridian.
That said petition will be heard and
duly considered by this court at the
Court Rooms of said Court, in the
County Court House. in the Village Of
Sherbrool1e, in said Steele County,
North Dakota. on Friday, the 10th day
of January, A. D. 1919. at ten (10) in
the forenoon of that day.
Or. in the event the County Seat Of
| said Steele County shall be then locat-
ed and established at the Village Of
Finley. in the said County, then and in
that case in the Court Rooms Of this
Court, on the second floor Of the eFFirst
National Bank of Finley, Village of
Finley. in the said County of Steele, at
| the time above mentioned
1t Is Further Ordered, That you, and
| each of you. are hereby cited and re-
quired to be and appear before the
Judge Of this Court, at said time and
place, and then and there show cause,
if any there be why said petition
should not be granted.
Dated November 18th, 1918.
By the Court,
(SeaD ADAM S. MOOTE.
Judge.
The Hope pioneer., 1918-12-26

it into pamphlets, each containing one
of the authors short stories. He
passed the copies, thus, abbreviated,
along the line, and they literally were
read to pieces.
The most insistent call is for detec-
tive thrillers and for tales Of the
Rocky mountains. Next comes the de-
nand for poetry. Robert w. Service
is the soldiers favorite poet, with
Rudyard Kipling close second.
Guide books which describe cha.
teaus, cathedrals and points Of his.
toric interest are in great demand, as
well as histories Of France. A recent
cable message to this country called
for 500 copies of :Jeanne dare" show
ing that the Maid Of Orleans is as
popular as the modern French maid
ems.
Demand for Serious Reading.
The librarians have been surprised
at the unexpected demand for serious
reading. Many soldier has evident
ly chosen war times to get in dig
ut some books the reading of which
he has hitherto postponed to q more
convenient season. With a perfectly
straight face a doughboy inquired the
other day for Boswell's life of John.
son."
OF course more than one inapproprl-
ate book has found its way overseas.
Imagine the emotions of the young
giant who stalked into "Y" hut, set
tied down for a quiet evening, and
found that the first book staring him
In the face was one Of the gushiest
and most effervescent of the Elsie
books.
Most of the money spent for the
565OOO purchased books has gone for
technical volumes designated to aid
the ambitious soldier in mastering the
science of war. Among these are books
on the psychology Of color for the
camouflage corps, the chemistry of
high explosives. ballistics, sanitary en-
cheering, hydrostatics, meteorology,
applied geology and other subjects on
which the modern soldier must be q
specialist.
The Hope pioneer., 1918-12-26
gions, with conditions most serious In

elOnS, with conditions most serious IN
Finland.
Bohemia, Serbia, Roumania and
Montenegro have already reached the
famine point and are suffering heavy
toll of death. The Armenian popula-
tiOn is falling each week as hunger
takes its toll, and in Greece, Albania
and RoNmania so serious are the food
shortages that famine is near. AL
though starvation is not yet imminent,
Italy, Switzerland, Bulgaria and Tur-
key are in the throes of serious strin-
gencies.
In order to fulfill Americas pledge
in world relief we will have to export
every ton of food which can he ham
died through our ports. This means at
the very least minimum OF 2O,000,000
tons compared with 6,O0O,O0O tons pre-
war exports and 11,S20,O00 tons ex-
ported last year, when we were bound
by the ties of war to the European
allies.
If we fail to tighten the black spots
on the hunger map or If we allow any
portions to become darker the very
peace for which we fought and bIed
will be threatened. Revolt and anarchy
inevitably follow famine. Should this
happen we will see in other parts of
Europe a repetition Of the Russian de.
hacle and our fight for world peace
will have been in vain.
The Hope pioneer., 1918-12-26
MILLION BOOKS
sent TO FRANCE
No Army in History Ever Read as
0mniverousIy as the
Yanks.
prefer DETECTIVE STORIES
Unexpected Demand for Serious Read.
ing Surprise to LIbrarians-Tech.
nicai Books Great Aid to the
Ambitious Soldier.

WashIngton.-More than a million
books have been shipped abroad by
the American Library association for
the use Of the American expeditionary
force. The total available was 3,OOO,.
600, aal this will be supplemented by
unlitl war work campaign contri-
button of $3,500,O00 out of it's total of
$17O,500,o 600 for the six allied welfare
organiAa ions.
About one-half Of the area covered
IN France by the American expedition.
ary force has received it's first sprink-
ling OF books. The distribution is pro.
ceedirg rapidly and next July there
Will be established in Paris central
reference library of 10000 volumes
available to any American soldier in
France. Upon application of hut
secretary any book in the Paris Ii.
brary will be sent anywhere in France
free OF charge.
At every bookshelf the men hnd O
poster Which reads: "These books are
loaned on the honor system. If YOU
fail, it fails. America is far away,
tonnage scarce and books precious
Play square with the other fellow; he
has played square with you"
Fiction Predominates.
The books seht to Europe have been
Of two kinds, those contributed and
those purchased by the funds Of the
association, which have amounted to
$1,OO0,O0O. The variety Of contributed
books is astounding and ranges from
mystery stories to theological treatlses,
from murder yarns to Milton's poems.
Fiction, of course, predominates.
No army in history ever read 80
omniverously as has the American
army in France. The men are greedy
for books. In the days when the sup
ply was inadequate, the demand was
so great that u doughboy who had
taken over ipDhis barrack bag copy
Of o. Henry's The Four Million" split
The Hope pioneer., 1918-12-26
A Mean Remark.

A Mean Remark.
1--WE pride ourselves on being pro-
gressive community" said the resident
of dead town.
"In what respect?" asked the curious
stranger.
"Our streets are always kept clean"
"But what does it profit town to
have clean streets, if they are not in
use2"
The Hope pioneer., 1918-12-26
Stunned,

Stumped.
"Now, Lieutenant Tompkins," said
the general, "you have the battalion
in quarter column, facing the south
how would you get it into line, in
the quickest possible way, facing north
east?"
"Well, sir" said the lieutenant, aft
er moment fruitless consideration,
'do you know, that's what I've often
Wondered?"
The Hope pioneer., 1918-12-26
!. WITT
ana
[dl(UKXW!}
Means Nothing to Fer.

"There's thing that's troubling
me-" remarked Mr.. Glibwitz.
"Tell me your SORROWS" said Mr..
Gadspur cheerily.
"Why is it that when the average
married woman starts out to teach
her husband how to economize she be-
gins by telling him to quit smoking?"
"That question is easy to answer.
It's because the average married wom-
an doesn't smoke"
The Hope pioneer., 1918-12-26
Embarrassing Predicament,

Embarrassing Predicament.
"Do you know of anything more tire.
some than listening to some other fel.
low make love to girl over the tele.
phone?"
"Oh, yes" replied Mr.. Dubson.
"Name it."
Being at the other end Of the line
and trying to look unconcerned while
waiting for the girl to ring off and give
you few kind words"
The Hope pioneer., 1918-12-26
Closed Up.

SLOW long did you work at the last
place where you were employed2"
"Only day, SIR"
you didn't stay there very long"
mo. sir. But it really wasn't my
fault. I got there day ahead of the
sheriff."
The Hope pioneer., 1918-12-26
Wow!
Little grains Of powder,
Little dabs Of paint =
Make the girly-girlies
Look like what they amt.
A Dilemma.

A Dilemma.
Mrs. Mulligan-Do yez feel better
this morning, Mrs. O'Toole?
Mrs. O'Toole-I do, an then again
I don't.
Mrs. Mulligan-Thot's bad, fur it's
harrud to know whether to say Dim
sorry or glad.-Harper's Bazaar.
The Hope pioneer., 1918-12-26
Such a SIlllness

Such Stiffness!
"Ever 60 fishing with a glrl?"
"Once."
did she protest against hurting the
6sh2"
mo. She said she was sure they
were perfectly happy, because they
were all wagging their tails"
The Hope pioneer., 1918-12-26
Painful SUGGESTION.

Painful Suggestion.
"My life is insured for $50,000," said
old Crustiboy, proudly.
"Have you ever discussed with
young Mrs. Crustiboy the possibility
of your dying some day2"
"Oh. yes. Quite often"
"Ahem! And while you were dis
cussing that subject did you ever no.
tice wistful look on her face?"
The Hope pioneer., 1918-12-26
IndestructlbIe.

IndestructlbIe.
II presume the vases, plates and ar
ticles Of furniture broken over the
heads of modern picture comedians
are made of soma soft material to
avoid serious injury"
mo doubt. But even SO, believe
the average movie comediaa's head
has the durability of granite"