Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1918-03-01
The OTHER ANGLE
Spring Fever

Spring fever is one of those diseases
you can't be vaccinated for.
1t takes more than traffic cop and a
'Go-go" semiphore to vulcanize you
against this annual accident, and the
surgeons have never discovered any
anti-toxin to At it.
With lots of folk spring fever is a
year-round alibi for being late to work
and with all the others it's just chronic.
Mexico has an epidemic of spring fe-
yer every time the sun gets north of
the equator, and she tries to revolu-
tionize the northern hemisphere.
when to plant their potatoes by the new
promises the kaiser sprinkles in their
peace prospects.
Symptoms of spring fever with us
Americans make themselves apparent
in various forms in various natures.
Witness the golf f1end-when winter
overtakes his spring fever he goes to
Pinehurst or Palm Beach and has it all
over again. He Is never without the
germ of spring fever in his system, and
1t makes itself contagious in his con-
versation.
Everything he takes hold of he tries
to knock for a field goal or something.
and at the table he asks for a portion
why the Mrs. bawls him out for trying
to sink it in two drives and a putt.
He's merely warming up for Sunday
afternoon.
Another Indication of his ailment is
noticeable in his mannerisms at the
shop. He tells the Office boy he isn't in
to any callers unless their names are
on the club mailing list, and If the am
bilious caller can't chatter golf. he
way gossip is all he has any ears for.
and the bird who tries to buzz about oil
stocks is spouting in foreign jabber
Then there is the automobile maniac
and here is an easy victim to the
scourge. About March l he can be
counted on regularly to bust out into
an epidemic Of spring fever. and he's
good for the carburetor ward until the
last leaf has fiuttered from the mamma
oak.
His symptoms are first noticeable
when he starts purring and whining
every time a motor shutters past his
office window.
He begins to be affable to the clerical
force. He chucks the Office boy under
the chin as he dashes out to luncheon.
and he declares Saturday a half-holi-
day without petition signed by a
quorum of the factory inmates.
When he gets to treating every one in
the corporation and a couple of shares
OF worcestershire stock, then you can
make sure his mind is not on undivided
profits or the annual treasurer's re-
port
This invalid from automobile spring
fever is all inoculaaed up with a
virus that they never have invented a
formula to heal The only way you
can cure the specimen Is to give him
inner tubes when he asks for dough-
nuts and iubricating oil when he yelps
for near-beer.
You can always tell when he is con-
valescent. for he will crave Hamburger
steak on meatless Tuesday and angel
food on wheat1ess Wednesday-the
poor fish not knowing that they are
both prohibited by George Creel on
porkless Friday.
You don't need to see the buzzards go
north. or the price of eggs go south to
tell when spring arrives, II you look
for the earmarks Of the first signs of
a thaw on the heels of the commuter.
Heels are a funny place to look for
earmarks, bit not any funnier than
Germany's peace terms to Russia. so
why get personal among friends?
The propellers of the ordinary sub
urbanite always indicate to us town
folk when to lay away our fannels
and press up the old palm beach
kimono.
Loving ones country is a noble trait
but wearing it on ones shoes is pa
triotism of the sort that is bound to
chagrin the kaiser.
You said it,