New-York tribune., 1918-01-30
Shoes and Ships
And Sealing Wax

,.hcy were nice, fat wild ducks, and
-hcy swan 30 close to the Depart
mcnt Of Corrections steamer Corrcc
ton on her way to Blackwell's Island
that Harry Cunliffc, of the Department
Of Finance, reached outside to grasp
one, his mind filed with visions OF
apple sauce and sage stuf1ing.
Then his foot slipped and he divcd
toward the ducks and the inhos pitablc
water Of the East River. No one knows
what might have happened had not the
tail of his ovcrcoat caught on hook
While deckhands ran for boathooks, Mr.
CunIiffc hung suspended. giving Il
noisy but otherwise excellent impcr-
sonation of .Mahomet's coffin.
Finally the boathooks got purchase
and he was hoistcd aboard, upside
down. The wind was chill, and Mr..
Cunliirc FASTENED to the cabin to cover
sundry rents in his attire by sitting
firmly in the largest chair obtainable.
The ducks went on swimming.
The market Tor police whistles has
been brisk in Jersey City and other
Hudson County towns since Hoboken' s
highwayman began his nightly dcprc-
dations in the streets of these munici-
palitics. One cntcrprising firm has
sent canvassers from door to door and
rcapcd large profit thereby. Doubt is
beginning to creep into some purchaG-
crs' bosoms, however. as to whether the
highwayman, if he does hold them up,
Will consent to their blowing their
whistles, even once.
BALTIMORE, Jan. 29.-From over
the other side Of the world the faint
mu.tor Of wireless message came to
the ears of the operator at the station
in Camp Meade to-day. He tuned his
instrument and the faraway sputter-
ing5 became clearer. Suddenly he real
ICED that he was listening in" on q
message flashed from Naucn. Germany
No ono knows for whom the message
vas intended. But it is at Washington
now, whore the code may be dcciphercd.
The good old days" are among the
many things that never come back, and
for this reason William Travers
Jerome. once the bane of gamblers in
New York City, does not believe that
the town will bo "wide open" again, no
matter how lcnient Tammany may be
inclined to be
NO town. said the man who closed
Canficld's. that has once been closed
ever "copens as widely again. In the
old days that the city once knew gam
blcrs were so bold that they all but en-
ployed the 'pullcr in methods formerly
prevalent among clothing men in Bax-
ter Street. You almost had to play,
whether you wanted to or not.
"lt will never be like that again. No
matter how much a town wishes to
backslidc. it is bound to retain some
shrcds of spcctability and restraint.
The old days will never come back
LIVERPOOL. Jan. 2e.-Whcn the
Mayor Of Southport gave his annual
dinner to The 500 poor of his bailiwicll
ne was moved to apologize. Tea was
50 expensive. he explained. that he
would have to serve beer instead. With
one voice the guests announced that
it didn't matter in the least
WILKES BARRE, Penn. Jan. Do
The suburb Of Scotch Hill is to-day a
deserted village. BY tomorrow it may
be nothing but a series of holes in the
ground. The last Of the forty families
living there moved out to-day. At any
moment their homes may drop into the
mine of the Madeira Coal Company,
directly beneath the community. Al
ready the ground is cracking and the
buildings arc beginning to sag.