The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1918-08-01

bell and rely on the clock. Let the
maid have breakfast at the proper
hour. and we viii be there"
That night he wound up the alarm.
and then set intellectually he set II
on, owing to the fact that he wound
up the alarm before changing the dial
hand.
do you think it necessary to mo-
tify all the neighbors that you have
purchased an alarm clockY' his wife
asked sweetly.
I am running this clock" he re
torted.
The alarm informs us that it is
time to get up before we have gone
to- bed" she suggested, "and the clock
| is the autocrat."
| 1T will be after this" he answered
doggedly. 'Tve got the hang of it
now
Barring the fact that he made a
mistake of fifteen minutes in setting
1t. all was as it should be the first
morning. and the second 1t was alb
solutely correct
| Now" he announced jubilantly,
1--WE have things down to system.
| Hereafter pay attention to nothing
but the autocrat."
| This is busting day." Mrs. Hoskins
remarked. Don't you think we'd bet
ter put IT."
II think" he interrupted, "that It
is only necessary to let 1t alone and
say nothing. 1t is doing all right as
1t is, and / don't recall that your
ideas have helped matters very much
heretofore.
So 1t happened that he was awak-
ened about one o'clock the following
night.
"Shall we get up?" she asked sleep
lily. 'The autocat has spoken"
1.-THE blamed thing is crazy!" he
exclaimed. Somebody must have been
fooling with it."
Il told you it was busting day."
she returned, land I saw the maid
examining it with some curiosity"
why didn't you say sol" he de-
manded.
Interfere with the autocratT she
asked with mild surprise.
He gave an angry exclamation, and
devoted five minutes to setting 1t by
the light of match. But he forgot
to wind the alarm again.
/ l- Tn x,I,op I,o ,,ovk xuo1>o
up he found his better half standing
In the doorway, fully dressed.
Don't you think you'd better get
up, dear?" she asked solicitously.
breakfast was ready fifteen minutes
ago."
| "Great heavens" he cried. "Why
didn't you call met"
"The autocrat was to do that" she
answered pleasantly, "and it would
hardly do for me to interfere with
anything so reliable. Nothing else is
to be depended upon, you know"
He recalled his oversight. and
dressed hastily without further com
ment. But he was not in good hui
NOR. However, the clock worked to
perfection for the three succeeding
days, and his equanimity was restored
In fact, he commented with some
pride on the fact that, for the first
time, the house seemed to be running
on a system. Then, one morning as
he was dressing, he noticed that his
wife was cycling him with idle curl.
Osity from her couch.
| "Sick 2" he asked.
"Oh, no." she answered.
aren't you going to get upf'
"After WHILE" she replied with q
yawn.
/ 'Laziness," he announced, sis come.
thing detest."
$50 do l." she asquiesced careless
| ~, "but it's disagreeable to get up SO
long a time before breakfast"
The fun import Of this remark did
not dawn upon him until he was al
most fully dressed. Then he turned
to her with startled look and de
manded to know whether anyone had
been fooling with the clock.
"Not that I know Of" she an
Swered.
/ Anything wrong with itY'
II think not. But, you see," she
| went on lazily, "this is Sunday morn
ing, and we therefore have breakfast
an hour later than usual"
/ For moment he could only glare
at her.
/ "And you let me get up and dress
myself I" he cried.
"What can do" she asked, "wher
the autocrat speaks? A poor, unre
liable woman dare not dispute it."
i He picked the clock up and dropped
it on the floor. Then he kicked it
and after that he put his heel on it.
sMrs. Henry Homer Hoskins," hi
said with emphasis ''are you the au