The Butler weekly times and the Bates County record. (Butler, Mo.) 1918-1950, 1918-12-12
ii Letter From One of Our Boys in
France.

The following letter was written by
4 soldier overseas and published lit
-Liiaison," the official paper of the
Coast Artillery School, Fort Monroe,
IVA.
n III the first place, never get ON a
train in France without an overcoat,
= copy OF La Vie Parisienne, three
Tpackagcs of cigarettes, few bars OF
chocolate, a good nights sleep be-
hind yon, and a prayer on your lips.
Also, it might be we'll to wear, a
French dictionary. a heavy pair OF
socks and an aggressive look. In
France, as in America, they have the
local and the through trains, whose
velocity vary between that OF the old
Battery Ruggles' Express and the
Newport News Monroe Electric.
The locals are partial to flat wheels
and sidings and have low ballistic
rco,.efficient The others aren't so
Ebad-in the daytime-if you happen
10 be leaving Paris, know the ropes,
have loose franc, and are not arerse
to quitting the Boulevard long
enough to make reservation. On
any other occasion, you have to rely
upon your prayers. poorest manners
and physical prowess. Some trans
have heat, but you always strike the
ones that haven't, and then the radi-
ator undorfoot refrigerates-where
fore the heavy wool. Some trains
have diners. but. somehow. you also
manage TO miss those. And then
comes the Camels' utility: for Gig
arctic or two or three fraternally
proffered will usually awaken a
French invite to share Camembcrt.
war bread and win rouge. 1t is said
that sleepers are furnished to pill
grims to Nice-but we do not acquire
sleeping acquaintance with them.
All trains have first. second and
third-class carriages: which differ
practically. i'll their degree OF cleanl!-
ness or I'M depending upon the last
|occupants). and, theoretically. in the
LEG room. These carriages possess
either corridor ore not. The former
are seen on the through trains; the
latter are cross between Il row OF
bird cages and Sing Sing when pop
ular In the corridor cars yon usually
stand in the corridor In the others
you crowd a seat Or lounge on the
floor. \ locomotives impressiveneS
is in direct proportion to the note OF
its whistle. The French is h,gf,
Tetrazinni squeak. first cousin TO our
miniature railways uninspir'ng 1al
setto. \'uu may sometime be able tn
catch train which does not arrive
at some hour between retreat and
rcyillea but this is unusual. But yo,
have to hand it to EN- that they sc!
sou therc-even ii it takes two extra
LAPS and a new whistle to do it.
Getting up to the Front is fifty
fiftv between hobomg it through
Texas and running circus. There
arc, possibly. fifty cars i'll Your tram
a busy mess sergeant. aho
|"tInnmcs," forty per box car. lo;
swear nj the hard seat, eat somt
more, and wonder when YOU are go
ing to get to Flanders. and then yov
doze off until your brother lieuten-
ants sibilant shores awaken you. ano
YOU take another bite, Then you gel
disguste,l and wish you were IN one
al the "llommcs 4o-ChevauN : ca
booses; and finally, if you think OF u
and are willing to flirt with repri
mand you sleep on the floor of the
least crowded equipment car-anc
wake up in Lorraine. There
nothing like it!
Up at the Front YOU travel by mar
row gauge. truck. side-car, "A pied.
or Dodge. The narrow gauge is all
right ii it doesn't run off the track
and you are possessed of an infinite
patience and prospective shower
bath. The truck furnishes a chiro-
practic sort of experience until 1t de-
yelops gastrunomic asthma or tail
ing for bitches. The side car makes
the hand salute menace to the right
eve: and a'pied" is @. X. il YOU
aren't wearing the soN tina, mother or
sister sent you. But the Dodge,
the Dodge. be it the most debilitated
Dodge that ever ratified, will make
even a lieutenant lounge with the
comfortable ease OF a q. Nj. paymas-
ter Cadillacing south.
But, between all OF us uniformed
kickers, IFS lot better sport than !,
sounds and. anyhow, who the devil
wants to spend his life tippi ng Pull
man portcrS.
Co.. Cat 81,