The Ocala evening star. [volume] (Ocala, Fla.) 1895-1943, 1918-03-20
HAPPY HITS
(ocaleean Ensign)

(0caleean Ensign
Miss Mays: "Now, who will tell
me what name was applied to the fol-
lowers of John Hus?"
Sam: "Hussies."
Miss Williams: eyes, l want YOU
to read sPrue and T. by tomorrow
Tom: ("Thoughtfully'D Prune
Eyer what funny name? 2"
81 notice that wealthy woman who
is giving all her time toward knitting
for the soldiers got hurt in motor
accident"
WAS she badly injured ?"
Seemingly not. You see the car
turned over and when it was righted
she was found under it, still knitting
away for dear life Excited? yes, very
much so because she had dropped
stitch. Birmingham Herald.
"Did you know that the u. S. gov
eminent has contracted for the entire
water melon crop of Florida this
year,"
mo, what's the idea ?"
"Well you see our troops will have
taken half of Germany by the time
watermelons are ripe, and of course,
Uncle Sam will feed our troops on
the @Rhine."
What are you conserving ?"
/ "Blackberries."
"Why they don't get ripe until
May"
'But. you see. I'm hoping that the
war will be over by then."-Ex.l
Father: "The man that marries
my daughter gets prize"
Baron "Bonehead": "Bah jove, it's
rally clevaw idea, don't cher
know Milestones.
Science Teacher: "Can you tell me
what the unit of electrical resistance
is called ?"
Tom: "No'm."
Science Teacher: "That's right, an
ohm"
| A green grocer's boy hailed YES
sci in dock. The surly mate asked
him what he wanted in a gruff voice.
GIVE got some vegetables for the
ship" was the reply.
Cali right, stay where you are and
toss them up to me, one at time"
The boy started tossing up dried
peas. "Ahoy, up there" he said, give
got two hundred pounds of them. -
Selected.
Mrs. Todd: (Which New England
state has two capitals, Jack?"
Jack: .New Hampshire"
Mrs. Todd: Indeed? Name them"
Jack:"Capital M and capital n +"
If two red lips were upturned to your
With no one around to gossip about it,
Would you pray for endurance to let
them alone?
Maybe you wouldn't I doubt it.
Penn. State Froth.
Yes, In Wartimes
Miss Williams: Louise, what is
meant by the word Joiner
Louise Spencer: 81 don't know un-
/ less it is a preacher"
| Corporal Rastus, (ex-chicken thief
i eff all youse colored bucks don't get
on these heah logs, Use gwine ter hand
in yo name to the lootenant."
Private Black Jack: "Gwan, Mig
ger, Use known yo down in Georgia,
yo cayn't write tall. "-Ex.
Try This On Your Piano
Your hands were made to hold, my
/ dear;
Your hair to lure me on;
Your eyes were made to sparkle clear;
POUR face to gaze upon.
dear;
| Your waxen ears petite
Were made to catch the silver strains
OF music soft and sweet.
| Your lips were made to kiss, my dear
| Your arms were made to cling;
Your voice was made to speak,
But-NOT TO SING.-Albany Press.
Moultrie was having his fortune
told. "Look out for a dark man who
will in the near future cross your
path"
| Moot: "You better warn him,
cause when I get my FLYER started,
"she" takes long time to STOP"
Kinks: In the olden days a gentle
man used to call upon a lady with
much formality and stately ceremony.
Blinks: Well, what of it?
Kinks: Now he merely drives up
| in front of her home and honks for