The Meeker herald., 1918-09-21
ADVICE TO LovELORN
BY VINCENT q. PERRY.
Copyright, 1918. BY the Mcclure Newspa
Per 6yndicats.)


Copyright. 1918. by the Mcclure Newspa,
Per syndicats.)
"Dear Joan The young man
am engaged to insists upon using
rose perfume on his hair. and
Just detest the odor Of rose per-
fume on anybody's hair. am
afraid 1t Is going to cause us to
break OF our engagement. love
him dearly, too. What would you
advise? Broken Hearted"
Bob Clarke read the letter over and
showed piece Of copy paper into bis
typewriter. In less than half . min.
ute he had written = paragraph Of
advice to Broken Hearted" and
pinned 1t to her letter. ready for the
printers. There was heap Of letters
before him and he dealt with the ones
on top. They were all along the same
line.
When Bob had answered more than
he thought the editor would let 20
through. he sat back In his chair and
looked at the pile Of unanswered ones
that would have to 90 into the waste
paper basket. 1t seemed as II every
person In love In the city wrote to
"Joan" for advice.i II they had known
that Joan was q man-and q very
young one. too-perhaps there would
not have been 80 many letters.
Lovers quarrels had always seemed
a Joke to Bob. until he had had one
Of his own. It was no joke.
He paced up and down to think It
over and then sat down again. He
had the room to himself. so he was
able to think 1t out undisturbed.
He wished there was some one to
tell him how to 60 about 1t to AZ
things up. Then the idea came to
him. Why not follow some Of his own
advicef he thought. He had his coll
umn on nle for year back and he
went through the paper to locate Q
case like his own. He did find one that
was very much like his. The girl in
the case had been just as stubborn
a. Cleo and had banged down a re-
ceiver just as Cleo had done. Re-
ceivers seemed to be . popular
weapon In lovers quarrels. He read
his answer and noted each instruction.
"Be bold; don't let her see that you
are down-hearted; 60 to her home
and demand Ambulance: show her
that you mean business, and she will
Be sure to forgive you" he had said.
That answer didn't seem to ft his
case at all. But II "Pining Away"
had been successful. he didn't see why
he couldn't be. BY carrying out the
same plan. Il wouldn't hurt to try,
at any rate. Cleo couldn't do any.
thing worse than close the door In his
face.
/, Cleo didn't slam the door In Bob's
face, but after she had snubbed his
every effort to talk to her. for fifteen
minutes. he wished she had.
"Why won't you be reasonable.
Cieor he pleaded at last.
"Reasonablei" she exclaimed.
"Have I not been reasonable1 It u
you who are not reasonable. II you
really had loved me you would be-"
"But I have apOl0gised, dear. and
taken all the blame" he said. wont
you be your old self asainf Why did
you allow me to come here II you
weren't going to speak to mer'
T don't want you to take the blame
and I didn't want You to come here.
II you really thought you were to
blame you wouldn't acknowledge it
men never do.
There was an entirely new argu.
ment for Bob. He had always been
Of the Impression that women were
odd, but now he was convinced Of It.
ANY one will tell 700 I am to
blame" he said. Then he was struck
with a sudden thought. "Why don't
you write to the Advice to the Love-
lorn' column In the paperf The an
swer will convince rs who 10 to blame.
Joan knows all about such things"
"But Joan must be q friend Of
yours; do you know who she isf'
Cleo asked suddenly.
"Joan Is my worst enemy" he an
swered. my knowing who Joan u
won't make any difference In the re-
ply. will guarantee that"
you will have to help mo compose
the letter." Cleo said. a. she secured
the stationery.
Bob did most Of the debating and
Cleo did most Of the writing. chang
ing his views Of It here and there.
READ It over" Bob said, when Il
was completed.
Cleo read 1t aloud.
sDecsn't It sound foolishr she
asked, Al he finished. ut 10 a. silly
a. tie ones that appear In the paper.
Bob. we'll make idiots Of ourselves II
we send this In. We really didn't
have anything to quarrel over"
Il don't think we had. either" he
agreed. Lets settle It without send.
ing this letter in. Tear 1t up."
Cleo needed no second bidding. The