Manchester Democrat. [volume] (Manchester, Iowa) 1875-1930, 1918-09-11
The Kaiser as | Knew Him
for Fourteen Years
By ARTHUR N. DAVIS. D. D. S.

49,

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Copyright. 1s1l ~ the Nc
sYour new ambassadors daughter IL
the best looking young lady who has
attended our court In many . day." he
declared "Half dozen Of my young
staff officers are very anxious TO marry
her. Can you tell me. DaviA whether
these Leishmans have money!
II the Kaiser despised the American
propenslty for money-making. he was
certainly not averse to acquiring
American dollars sss..esa,<.~-S
He told mo once that every trip the
HambQrg,American liner Amerika
made from New York TO Hamburg re-
suited IL transferring $4,000 from
American to German pockets. and
added: #We're mighty glad to get some
Of your American money. I can tell
you."
OF the kaiser's versatility had
convincing evidence. In his converse
tions with me we usually wandered
From subject to subject In the most
haphazard manner. and he invariably
displayed surprising store Of infor-
nation ON every topic we touched, and
Z am not vain enough to believe that
he was SO anxious to make favorable
impression upon me that he prepared
Cor these discussions In advance.
Indeed, the kaiser discussed so free
y almost every subject that suggested
itself that 7 often wondered what his
advisors would have said had they
overheard our conversations. His read
lness to talk to me was undoubtedly
Hue to tendency he had to trust
every one with whom he came In init
mate contact. For man who was apt
to have 50 many enemies, he was less
suspicious than anyone had ever
met. He seemed to trust every one. and
his sense OF security unloosened his
tongue and made him more laxative,
perhaps, than was always discreet.
The kaiser was very fond Of listen
Ing to and telling stories with point
and would frequently invite me to tell
him any new one that might have
heard. Some of the stories we ex-
changed were more or less risque and
would be ont Of place in these pages,
but I do not mean to intimate that
there was anything very much amiss
with them. They always amused him
very much and he was quick to catch
the point.
The kaiser's sense Of humor fire.
qnently exhibited itself. He told me
Of q conference between representa-
tlves of all the powers regarding the
selection Of king for Albania after
the Balkan war. Some Of those present
thought The incumbent ought to be
Catholic. Others insisted that a Greek
Catholic was essential, still others
maintained that Mohammedan would
be- most logical.
It seemed quite impossible to come
to any agreement as to just what re-
llgion the king Of Albania should pro-
Tess, and the kaiser had ended the dis
cIlssion. he said, with the suggestion:
"Well. gentlemen. II a Protestant
won't do, and Roman Catholic won't
do and Buddhist is out Of the Ques-
ton, why not select Jew and call him
Jacob the First? He'll have his throat
cat. anyway, in three monthsi"
The powers did not select Jew. but
the prince Of Wied. the kaiser's nomi-
nee, was put on the throne. and within
q month or two afterwards had to fee
for his lie.
In referring to Roosevelt's patriotic
offer to lead an army In France, the
kaiser declared that he admired him
for his courage and zeal.
II hear he said, shat he is now on
he's way to Italy. 1t is too bad we did
not postpone our offensive there. Per-
hslps we might have captured him.
Wouldn't Teddy look funny in a gas
nlask?''
Shortly after the U-boat Deutsch-
land made Its successful trip to Amer
lea, the kaiser called on me. and he
was in very ocular frame of mind.
happened to mention to him that
planned to go to America the following
summer in connection with the porce-
lain tooth had patented.
well, 1t won't be necessary now.
Davis" be commented. 1--WE can send
the Deutschland over and bring back
a boatload Of teethw
six my teeth well. Davis" he de-
clared on another occasion. $50 that ]
can bite. There are lots Of people I
would like to bite" and he snapped
hls jaws together in way that would
have boded Iii for the victims he had In
mind. although his remark was evi.
IDENTIFY more facetious than vicious.
The courtesy and affability which
the kaiser almost invariably displayed
In his relations with me did not pre-
vent him on one occasion from show.
Ing his indignation when I touched him
upon what was evidently a very sore
polnt-the part that America was go
ing to play In the war. although he al
ways claimed to be unperturbed about
tho American situation.
He had pointed out that America at
that time had only 10000 men In
France and he believed that the o.
boats would effectively prevent any
great addition to our forces abroad, If,
indeed, they ever left. our shores.
"As a matter Of fact, however" he
added, your countrymen would be
very willing no doubt, to fight for their