davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1918-09-06
WEAK KIDNEYS MEAN
A WEAK BODY

When you're fifty, your body begins to
creak little. at the hinges. Motion is
mcre slow and deliberate. mot so young
as l used to be- is frequent and unwel-
come thought. Certain bodily functions
upon which good health and good spirits
so much depend. are impaired. The weak
spot is generally the bladder. Unpleasant
symptoms show themselves. Painful and
annoying complications in other organs
arise. This is particularly true with ell
DERBY people. If you only know how, this
trouble can be obyiated.
For over 200 years GOLD MEDAL
HARLEM Oil has been relieving the in
convenience and pain due to advancing
years. 1t is a standard. old-time home
remedy. and needs no introduction. 1t is
now put up in odorless, tasteless capsules.
These are easier and more pleasant to take
than the oil in bottles.
Each capsule contains about one dose Of
five drops. Take them just like you would
any pill with small swallow of water.
They soak into the system and throw off
the poisons which are making you old be-
fore your time. They will quickly relieve
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1918-09-06

those stiffened 'oints, that backachs, rheu.
matism, lumbsgo, sciatica, gall stones,
gravel brick DUST" etc. They are an
effective remedy for all diseases of the
bladder, kidney, liver, stomach and allied
organs.
GOLD MEDAL HARLEM Oil Capsules
cleanse. the kidneys and purify the blood.
They frequently ward off attacks of the
dangerous and fatal diseases of the kid
neys. They have beneficial effect, and
often completely cure the diseases of tho
bodily organs, allied with the bladder and
kidneys.
II you are troubled with soreness across
the loins or with simple" aches and pains
in the back take warning, it may be tho
preliminary indications of some dreadful
malady which can be warded off or cured
if taken in time.
Go to your druggist today and get box
of GOLD MEDAL HARLEM Oil Capsules.
Money refunded if they do not help you.
Three sizes. GOLD MEDAL are the pure,
original imported HARLEM Oil Capsules.
Accept No Substitutes.-Adv.
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1918-09-06
LEMON JUICE
TAKES OFF TAN
Girls! Make bleaching lotion
if skin is sunburned,
tanned or freckled

Squeeze the juice of two lemons into
a bottle containing three ounces Of
orchard White, shake well, and you
have quarter pint of the best freckle,
sunburn and tan lotion, and complexion
peautlher, at very, very small cost.
Your grocer has the lemons and any
drug store or toilet counter will supply
three ounces of Orchard White for a
FEW cents. Massage this sweetly fra
grant lotion into the face, neck, arms
and hands each day and see how freck-
les, sunburn, windburn and tan disap-
pear and how clear, soft and white the
skin becomes. Yesl 1t is harmless.-
Adv,
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1918-09-06
Lovers EstranQed.

The cruel wind tore at the waves as
II to whirl them away.
The man and the maid sat close to-
gether on the bench and watched the
storm.
How the wind howls, darling" said
she, yelling to make herself heard.
Yes. shrleked her lover
why does 1t how'll" she screamed.
Dunno Perhaps it's got the tooth
ache" he beloved.
1.-THE toothache?" she howled. Glow
ever"
Yes" he roared. Haven't you
heard of the teeth of THE gale?"
Then the wind howled worse than
ever, rs she bonded him back the en-
gagement rnp--Stray Stories.
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1918-09-06

cpd my troubles caused by that weak
ness are thing Of the past All women
Who suffer - | did should try Lydia E.
Pinkham's Vegetable Compound. -
Mn. JAS. RoHRBERG, $40 Knapp St.,
N: s., Pittsburgh, Pa.
Women who suffer from any form Of
weakness, asindicated by displacements,
Inflammation, liberation, Irregularities,
backache, headaches, nervousness or
1.-THE blues," should accept Mrs. Rohr-
berge suggestion and give Lydia E.
Pinkham's Vegetable Compound q
thorough trial.
For over forty years It has been
correcting such ailments. If you have
mysterious complications write for
sdvice to Lydia E. Pinkham Medicine
Co.. Lynn, Mass.
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1918-09-06
AAll OUT

One day rent collector knocked
three times at certain house, without
even once getting n reply. Becoming
enraged, he went back a fourth time,
and In response to his knock an urchin
opened the door. "Where were you all
day2" demanded the collector. ~ was
out" replied the boy. "Where is your
father?" Hes out" "Where is your
mother?" "She's out" "Well," said
the collector, IT Will just go in and sit
at the fire until some one Of them re-
turns" "But the fires out, tooT quick
ly responded the boy.
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1918-09-06
DISPOSED OF.

you remember that clock you sold
mew asked the lady.
Eyes, madam. l do" replied the
salesman.
"You told me 1t would run eight
days without winding"
well, does 1t not, madam"
II don't really know. 1t had such a
diabolical alarm that l didn't keep 1t
long enough to find out"
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1918-09-06
Did Best She Could.

Mrs. Flatbush-Tm surprised at that
neighbor of ours.
Mr.. Flatbush-What's wrong now1
"Why, l saw her banging her hus-
band over the head today with her um-
brella."
"Oh, we'll, dear, ! guess that's all
right. Perhaps she didn't have 3 nut
cracker handy"
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1918-09-06
For PjmpJv Eaces.

To remove pimples and -blackheads
smear them with Cuticura Ointment.
Wash off In FIVE minutes with Cuticura
Soap and hot water. For free samples,
address "Cuticura, Dept x, Boston"
At druggists and by mail. Soap 25,
Ointment 25 and 5O-Adv.
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1918-09-06
HUSBAND
SAVES WIFE
From Suffering BY Getting
, Her Lydia E Pinkham's
Vegetable Compound.
Pittsburgh, Pa" For many months
y Wa not able to do my work owing to

. weakness which
caused Blackjack 9
and headaches. A
friend called m y
attention to one Of
your n g " spaper
advertisements and
i'm m ediately my
husband Dough I
three bottles Of
Lydia E. Pinkham's
V eye table Com
pound for m e.
After taking two
k~Ak1~ IA
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1918-09-06
Excusabje.

That's the first fight that ever made
me rum" said Broncho Bob.
II didn't know running was In your
line"
ut isn't. But this time III hadn't
run fast enough to catch up with Pr
ute Pete, there wouldn't have been any
fight"
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1918-09-06

Parkins was never tired Of prophecy
Ing calamfties and his friends were
gettin a bit fed up. Parkins had al
ready predicted famine and one day
he remarked dolefully to a friend:
what would you say, my boy, if
I were to tell you that in a short space
of time the rivers of our country would
all dry up?'
HIN, should say replied the
irlend, Ego thou and do likewisel"
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1918-09-06
Se~inQ Things.

Yeast--I see in book Minneapolis
man has invented for children pic
lures of animals which jump out in a
lifelike manner as the pages are
turned.
Crimsonbeak-I hope they'll keep it
away from father. because Mime
apolis isn't bone dry yet. You know.
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1918-09-06
MIGHT Try 1t.

Egypt? All, that Is dreamy, ro-
mantle land, the land of lotus eaters"
81 never ate any lotus" declared
Mrs. Wombat briskly. How is it
served %
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1918-09-06

When man is in love he is either
so happy or SO miserable that he
doesn't care what happens.
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1918-09-06
Perhaps Both.

Wifey-I believe you're getting old;
you never go out with the boys any
more.
Hubby (knowingly)-It isn't age;
It's wisdom.
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1918-09-06
happx pIsanpointment.

Sad prophecies all unfulhlled
Bid every pessimist be mute.
Each year we say, THE fruit crops
killed.
Yet somehow there IL always fruit.
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1918-09-06

Some folks go to church for the pur-
pose of obtaining fresh supply of
gossip.
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1918-09-06

Children are happy because they
have not learned the art of being mis-
cradle
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1918-09-06

"DO you believe children Inherit
faultsT
Certainly. Our children get al
theirs from their fathers side"
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1918-09-06
Good Reason,

Redd-They always call ship she,
don't they?
Greene-Yep.
well, do they call an airship she.
too7"
Certainly"
"Why7"
Because they're inclined to be
Eighty"
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1918-09-06

Gardening Is a good deal like rails
Ing children"
Il find that It's not enough merely
to have one. To get the best results
with either a child or garden you've
got to give them constant care"
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1918-09-06
ABSORBING I Ssess

. ":E313:ITT7 STOPS
n LAMENE&0
from Bone SPAWN. Ring Bone,
Splint, Curb, Side Bone, or similar
troubles and gets horse going sound.
1t acts mildly but quickly and good re-
IA suits are lasting. Does not blister
~ or remove tho hair and horse can
IA be worked. Page II in pamphlet with
u each bottle cells how. 81. SO bottle
delivered. Horse Book r free.
ABSORBING, JR., the antseptc liniment
for mankind, reduces Painful Swelings, En-
larged Glands, Wens, Bruises, varicose Veins,
heals Sores. Allays Pain. Will tell you
more if you write. fl.2s bottle at dealers
or delivered Liberal TRIAL bottle for Zoe samps
W.T. YOUNG, P. o. r.. ao Temple ST. cid, Mats
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1918-09-06

Mary's Little Shoes.
Mary had a little limp
And burrows in her brow.
She couldn't wear number two,
But tried 1t anyhow.
The Pensacola journal. (Pensacola, Fla.) 1898-1985, 1918-05-29
UNCLAIMED ''KA|G"
REMAINS IN OFFICE
OF j. s. MARSHAL

In the office of the United States
marshal is t6 gallon Of beer key with
a wooden spigot and no owner. II
looks lonesome and empty, not having
been refilled since its rough usage by
party of soldiers about ten days ago.
1t does not belong there. Attaches OF
the marshal's office have so officially
stated and just what its disposition
will be made is a matter of conjec-
ture but it is believed it should go
back to it's original owner but no one
apparently wants to be the original
owner.
This key played part in dignlrIed
United States court proceedings but
being mute, could not give any testi-
mony which would enlighten the tr:-
bunal, hence its neglect, it not being
appreciated at all.
This is the key which, when full, was
taken by Corporal Stacey, or said to
have been taken by Corporal Stacey
the army, to point near the military
reservation. where it was met by a
party of soldiers, who welcomed it and
/ carried 1t tenderly in the bushes and
licked" up its contents.
Steve Jones was arrested, charged
with having taken the key to the sol
diers in red automobile. Corporal
Stacey testified that he was the one
who drove a machine of Jones with
the key in it as precious freight, not
Jones. Jones was tried before United
States Commissioner j. ]. Sullivan, VINO
after hearing the evidence for the gov
eminent and the defense, rendered a
Scotch verdict of mot proven" and
Jones was released.
But the keg remains in the office Of
the United States marshal and If the
owner wants it he can have it. Appar
emily Corporal Stacey does not care to
again adopt it and Steve Jones has
not laid any claim to it.
1t might be ratified off for a patriotic
cause.
The Pensacola journal. (Pensacola, Fla.) 1898-1985, 1918-05-29
SHOOT MOSQUITOES
WITH LOADED GUN
This is the only satisfactory way
to get rig of this
harmful pest

Ladies who have used so-called mos
quito remedies which. instead of de
stroying, seemed to fatten the pests
who have risked~ iajuring their com
plexions by applying evil-smelling mix
lures to face and hands, will learn witt
interest how to get rid of mosquitoes
also reaches, flies and other pests
quickly, effectively and without dis
comfort
Many prominent Florida women us
a Fenole gun, which is small hand
sprayer, loaded with Fenole. With thi
gun properly loaded, fine mist is
shot with force into corners, crevices
and all parts OF the room which might
be hiding places for mosquitoes
reaches, spiders or bugs Of any kind
Fenole not only kills insects, but il
sterilizes the eggs.
Make home a safe and comfortable
place in which to live. Get a Fenole
spray gun and can Of Fenole stain
less liquid spray from your grocer
druggist or hardware store today. The
cost is trivial compared with the salts
faction and comfort it insures.-Adv.
The Pensacola journal. (Pensacola, Fla.) 1898-1985, 1918-05-29
Exemption Board
on Appeal From
Nineteen Counties

The federal exemption board for
in session last evening going over ap-
peals Of cases from local boards from
nineteen counties, which are within
their jurisdiction. The members stat
ed. that there were no appeals Of es-
pecial interest. The board will hold
another session tonight from six to
seven o'clock in the American Nation
al Bank building, rooms 30 and 211
and will be glad to hear anyone desir-
ing to appear before 1t.
Last evening there were represen-
tatives of industrial concerns who
told the board that certain men who
were subject to service were necessary
as workmen in. plants which were do
ing government work. Most of the
appeal cases come up on these
grounds.
Members OF the federal board re-
quested that It be stated that there
are three boards sitting in Pensacola
doing work Of a like character Upon
one occasion there was considerable
comment raised about one case in par
ticular, with which members of this
body stated they had nothing what
ever to do but were subject to some
criticism.
The other boards passing upon
cases, which they desired to call at
tention to were the Escambia County
local board and the medical advisory
board.
The Pensacola journal. (Pensacola, Fla.) 1898-1985, 1918-05-29
Mack Lewis Says
People Very Kind
to the Sailor Boy

Friends of Mack Lewis. who Is now
on the way to France, will be inter-
ested to learn something Of that
well-known young mans experiences,
which he writes to relatives in this
city.
This Is some world" writes Mack
in a recent letter. from New York
The people up her in New York treat
MS Just like kings. Our uniform
passes us in shows and moving pic
lures and most anywhere we want 70
GO It's no joke when tell you / can
90 over to the city and see all kinds
of shows without a cent, for there Is
always someone ready to furnish g
sailor boy with ticket.
IT sometimes wish had Joined the
army so could get into the fight ]
sure want TO get into 1t bad, but I
guess I will in time get my share or
It."
Enlisting in the latter part Of jan
uary, young Lewis was transferred to
MONTGOMERY and thence TO an Allan
tic port A Florida boy, residing here
all his life. he did not appreciate being
thrown into a cold climate so sud
denly. especially when 1t was snow
ing every day, he reported. Gee. 1T
was cold" he wrote in former let
ter. land I would probably have suf-
fered very much from the intense
cold. but for the Red Cross. Yea
know did not have a chance to take
an overcoat. really did not know /
was TO be so suddenly transferred to
land of ice and snow. but, do you
know the Red Cross sure did come
across with an appreciated package
for me. In 1t, among other things
was a warm sweater, and you just
don't know how l felt toward those
who sent IT,"
He writes that he would like to tell
all about what he observes in the
several points he has visited, but says
that he will try and remember some
OF IL 10 tell whenever he gets back
home. He wished, however to be re-
membered to his many Pensacola
friends.
The Pensacola journal. (Pensacola, Fla.) 1898-1985, 1918-05-29
|||W[Q II! III TOP
AN ANlERICAN SOLDIER
WHO WENT q a
AQIflUl GUY FfIpEY
MACHINE GUNNER ,jERyING On FRAhcE-
lARIhR an EfipEYI

40 or three poorly dressed civil
Ians passed me. and although they ap-
oeared physically At, i said to myself,
They don't want to Join the army;
perhaps they have someone dependent
On them for support" so I did not &C
cost them.
Coming down the street / saw a
young dandy, top hat and all, with
fashionabIy dressed girl walking be-
side him. I muttered. You are my
meat and when he came abreast Of
me I stepped directly in his path and
stopped him with my swagger stick,
saying:
'You would look fine In khaki; why
not change that top hat for a steel
helmet? Aren't you ashamed Of your
self. husky young chap like You In
mutt when men are needed in the
trenches? Here / am, an American,
The Pensacola journal. (Pensacola, Fla.) 1898-1985, 1918-05-29
Swearing In a Recruit.

came four thousand miles from Ogden,
fight for your king and country. Don't
be a Stacker, buck up and get into uni
form come over to the recruiting Of
fee and I'll have you enlisted"
He yawned and answered, 81 don't
care II you came forty thousand miles,
no one asked you to-" and he walked
on. The girl gave me sneering look;
7 was speeches..
recruited for three weeks and near
~ got one recruit.
This perhaps was not the greatest
stunt In the world, but 1t got back at
the officer who had told me, Eyes, we
take anything over here" I had been
spending a good lot Of my recruiting
time in the saloon bar Of the Wheat
Sheaf pub (there was a very attractive
blonde barmaid, who helped kill time
was not as serious in those days as
was a little later when / reached
the front)-well, II was the sixth day
and my recruiting report was blank.
I was getting low in the pocket-bar-
maids haven't much use for anyone
who cannot buy drinks-so looked
around for recruiting material. You
know q man on recruiting service gets
a bob" or shilling for every recruit
he entices into joining the army, the
recruit is supposed to get this. but he
would not be a recruit IL he were wise
to this fact, would he?
Down at the end Of the bar was a
young fellow In mufti who was very
patriotic-he had about four "Old
Six" ales aboard. He asked me If he
could join, showed me his left hand.
two fingers were missing, but I said
that did not matter as 1--WE take any
thing over here" The left hand Is
the rifle hand as the piece Is carried
at the slope on the left shoulder. Near
IL everything In England is "by the
left" even general traffic keeps to the
port side.
I took the applicant over to head
quarters, where he was hurriedly ex-
amined. Recruiting surgeons were
busy In those days and did not have
much time for thorough physical exam
nations. My recruit was passed as
"flt" by the doctor and turned over to
q corporal TO make note OF his scars.
was mystified. Suddenly the corpo-
raj burst out with, "Blime me, two OF
his fingers are gone" Turning to me
he said, ''You certainly have your
nerve with you, not 'alf you amt, to
bring this beggar In"
The doctor came over and exploded,
"What do you mean by bringing In
man in this condition.
Looking out Of the corner of my eye
I noticed that the officer who had re-
cruited me had joined the group, and
/ could not help answering, well. sir.
was told that you took anything over
here"
I think they called It yankee Inn
pudence." anyhow it ended my recruit
Ing.
The Pensacola journal. (Pensacola, Fla.) 1898-1985, 1918-05-29
THIS IS THE
AGE Of YOUTH
Stands of Gray Hair May Be
Removed.

Strands of gray hair are unattractive
and very unnecessary and accelerate
appearance of approaching age. Why
not remove all traces OF gray in the
hair and possess an even shade of beau
tiful dark hair in bounteous qualities
by the use of "Lo Creole" Hair Dress
ing? Used by thousands of people
every -everywhere-with perfect
satisfaction. No one need be annoyed
with gray hair-hair streaked with
gray, diseased scalp or dandruff when
offered such a preparation as La
Creole" Hair Dressing. Apply it freely
to scalp and hair, rubbing it in we'll,
and after a few applications you will
be delightfully."- surprised with the re
suits.
The Pensacola journal. (Pensacola, Fla.) 1898-1985, 1918-05-29
TA CREOLE. HAIR DRESSING

FOR gray or faded hair and retain tne
appearance of youth. Used by gentle
men in every walk Of life to restore an
even dark color to their gray hair
beard or mustache. Sold and guaran-
teed by all good drug stores every
where, or sent direct for $3.50 by Van
Vleet-Mansfield Drug Co., Memphis,
Tenn.-Adv.
The Pensacola journal. (Pensacola, Fla.) 1898-1985, 1918-05-29

and those concerned and they are to
cooperate with the Department Of
Justice.
The United States District Attorney
office has already been notified OF this
registration and will see that the law
is carried out.
One of the peculiar features Off the
law does not mention the alien female
of Austria or any other country at wa
with the United States.
The Pensacola journal. (Pensacola, Fla.) 1898-1985, 1918-05-29
FEMALE.ALIENS
REGISTER JUNE II

Postmaster B. S. Hancock was yes
terday officially notified by the post
office department, along with otner
postmasters throughout the country
through the medium Of the Postal Bull
letin, that the registration of German
alien females will begin Monday June
II next and continue until June 26.
Rules for postmasters and postal EN-
ployes who will assist in this work,
have been forwarded to postmaster
The Pensacola journal. (Pensacola, Fla.) 1898-1985, 1918-05-29
PROCLAMATION Of
PRESIDENT POSTED

Postmaster Hancock yesterday re-
ceived the proclamation OF President
Wilson, relative to the registering by
young men who have attained the
age OF 81 since the last draft.
In it the president recites the act OF
congress and the rules governing such
registrations.
The proclamation has been posted
in the corridors OF the u s. Post
Office and Court House building.
The Pensacola journal. (Pensacola, Fla.) 1898-1985, 1918-05-29
CHAPTER n.

BIighty to Rest BiIIets.
The next morning the captain sent
for me and Informed me: 'Tmpey, as
recruiting sergeant you are a wash
out" and sent me to training depot
After arriving at this place. was
hustled to the Quartermaster stores
and received an awful shock. The
quartermaster sergeant spread a wa
terproof sheet on the ground and COM
menced throwing a miscellaneous as.
sortment of straps, buckles and other
paraphernalia into 1t. I thought he
would never stop, but when the pile
reached to my knees he paused long
enough to say, "Next, No. 5217, Iris,
B company" / gazed in bewilderment
at the pile of junk in front of me, and
then my eyes wandered around looking
for The wagon which was to carry 1t
to barracks. I was rudely brought to
cart by the quarter" exclaiming,
Ere. you, 'op 1t; tyke 1t aw'y; blind
my eyes, 'e's looking for is batman to
'elp i'm carry it,
Struggling under the load, with fire.
quent pauses for rest. I reached our
barracks Qarge car barns), and my
platoon leader came to the rescue. It
was a marvel to me how quickly he
assembled the equipment. After he
had completed the task, he showed me
how to adjust 1t on my person Pretty
soon I stood before him a proper Tom
my Atkins In heavy marching order,
feeling like an overloaded camel.
The Pensacola journal. (Pensacola, Fla.) 1898-1985, 1918-05-29

TO MY FRIENDS
In Escambia County and the En-
tire State of Florida.
! am working for the election
of my brother-in-law, j. WILL
YGN as State Auditor and ask
for your full support of his can
didacy,
Because
He has always made good
has proved that he is fully quail
flied to fill the office.
His election will prove to your
best interests-to the best in
terests of the entire state.
He is a West Florida boy.
He is clean, honest, progress
sive, dependable.
I will appreciate your vote for
]. WILL YON in the June 4th,
Primary.
MAX de- la RUA,
Conductor, l.. & n. r. r.
Paid ADVERTISEMENT 1854
The Pensacola journal. (Pensacola, Fla.) 1898-1985, 1918-05-29
COMPANY G TO PLAY
THE SHOP BOYS TODAY

Today. at $50 p. m. Company G.'s
ball team will cross bats with the
shop Boys once more on the East Hill
diamond
For the past several games between
these two fast teams the Shop Boys
emerged victors. Company G.'s
team will however go after the other
teams scalp with energy this after
noon.
The Pensacola journal. (Pensacola, Fla.) 1898-1985, 1918-05-29

(To be continued