davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Amarillo daily news. [volume] (Amarillo, Tex.) 19??-current, 1918-10-19
scarcity ~ Nurse 100 Gotham.
% AasorIal.d pfsa.

NEW YORK Oc o.. The soar
'liy of. nurses Is so great In thI. city
hat. 40 deal with 'Hr paulsh I'M
flnenAI epidemic, Health Commits
sioner Copeland tonIfU' appealed 90
business and pros nHh men 90
volunteer 10 work boz gHt shifts
in The hospitals. a. relieve nurses
Who have been on I"I. Io. many
hours 40 stretch
In asserting that boz had not
changed his mind about keeping
he schools open. Dr Copeland said
inyesti PatiOn indirafad chat more
than half Of the abr,nfas snre not
attending chool heau.r Hf car of
influenza held by thfr r.rr.f. aud
nor because the children we're 900
Even 10 more teacho become M.
ho said he deemed Il 100 necessary
'o Keep children in SCHOOL ud TO-.
Tor supervision
Former Health Comm si0ncr
GoldWaier tonight urs.i rhlt the
public schools be- closed Ji once
Rear Admiral Usher TODAY ISSUED
orders tp all officer. Iud enlisted
men under ms jurisdiction to keen
pui pf the subway AMI underground
'uhes until the span influenza
epidemic has ahaied.
Amarillo daily news. [volume] (Amarillo, Tex.) 19??-current, 1918-10-19
Arizona Pastor Unanimously Elected One Of Them
After He Braued Shell and BuiItf To Hem Cayyg
Wounded Colonel Bach 10 Safefg -Lcid Up
NOW Himself For Reraiys

troops m and down The Western
'.o. Most of mo fme b. Las
spent WITH tl- marines
la ,4.. be- Is A marine Uis
election vas luaumu. ana BOD
ray 4..l.t.rt9 ..u -l.... MID. "a
ai~ayf ready Cog t.a.i. WREN
uri'i- comes Naa.an .ruu e
Needed nap one afI.'.l as
couldn't Dad DE ,.af a.. .4p A
prank b. thought and D.. walked
or tl ~ ile a.r Hlr. Dee ...
Amarillo daily news. [volume] (Amarillo, Tex.) 19??-current, 1918-10-19

'r-a b % q -hsh and both
Gi.HHaI
I.. marine I %" r.s. - E..
.'. o.. t.. minute. eyer
Ir'. I.- ..il.a- .trl .at
Tie l.. wandering toward i.r Geo..
man Ines sfls l mE self
WHAT'S fAc halter H... .Ie iH.
] wells a. l'm. srf be- says be- o.
..bs tu hesdsHar',.s.
SO. N.. q. To- --Ys g. You're
.'t.rI'g stra.gL. ~ th, Ho,hos.
with taat %. loc kinder
griln-d add saii be- guessed be
t.1.r Wa.f 20 De n'ppli vet
sLIl- pie ge.s uraei around
Cd n t fF ri.lt uafi.
h- nmps lt 'Hf fUre hs
shoes h1r, hin ~ sometf ~
Up the street hhriug went h
Toe 10. didn't know y then. ngt
the shock o. tho exploding sLsu
had urnh.d his left LED aud
tr bed s1n.e ~ fhe nerves. so ths'
Or several Rt.ks his LED would
suddenly ard painfully give cut
under Llm
Amarillo daily news. [volume] (Amarillo, Tex.) 19??-current, 1918-10-19
Little change IN olora'lo.
~ A.socisisd Prs.s

DENVER. Od D. little material
change in tho iuflurHu .ifuaiion was
noied either BIS uafa or cts health
authorities today. confidence being
oppressed by both d. D. Kennedy.
.c'reiary OF the state board of health.
ana b. Or William % { Sharpley
manager of health 100 Denver That
efforts 90 combat boz disease are
meeting with rra utHlr degree of
success
10 ihnyer twenty additional deaths
we're reported duriHg HD lasi TWEEN
y four hours. bringing ile total FOR
The epidemic fp l3s ur 7harpIey
expects iHe epidemic 90 Denver to
show marked de.rear hs sunday
or Monday
IN no state condition. ere mprDy-
ing 90 Colorado SPRING while 300
northern and northeastern Colorado
new cases are growing BOO number
Fort Collins repurr Do. rdses
among students OF rh agricultural
college The student training camp
and citizens Wmy report. 200
Asses in uni county
Amarillo daily news. [volume] (Amarillo, Tex.) 19??-current, 1918-10-19
INFLUENZA EVIDENT
IN EASTERN STATES.
EfiDENIG MORE PRONOUNCED IN
so lions FAST OE THE
MISSISSIPPI
CASES STILL INCREASE
Total 't.f- REPORTED Prom arm,
Roach 25D.pi5: Also 1895
90 Win Pneumonia
MI Death.


MtaillNGTON. OCT Us Reports
tp ito public health service today
from % states showeg that spanish
in.u'ull 5000 H on tho Increase In
most part. pI the country Condl-
SON. DOB army camps also we're les.
DrftI'. The tssl ueW cases re-
ported Zoo uuon today .howing mat
Tho dN'a.o apparently vas station
.ary an'r th, marked decline noted
fDr several days
Ihr ,pd 'mlr Hul H more pro
uuuur'N 900 fut eastern section ~ the
rOurfr fhHu % b.. vest OF the Miss
sIpu river dur to m. more crowd
el condition Ir mo large cities Up
DOB popI'. taw Jersey had reported
Iut.tsH ,l.'H with 2.232 deaths.
tuii. 100 N'e York Ciiy. 4733 cases
pf influenza with 1856 deaths ami go
cases uf pneumonia with lg7 deaths
srrN reported yesterday
Delaware Epidemic Subsidies.
Deaths loo rnnnsyiyaniu up 10 90.
'Dnrr Do sen. placed at l0.0OIG ln
Delaware IUe epidemic apparently
Ras ub.ldlug Fewer cases also
Fcre reported from Massachusetts,.
1u' Boo Maine Rhode Island and New
Hampshire tho disease still was epi
semi. Maryland Also reported many
Hon rt.rt as did Virginia. North
1r0iiua South Carolina. Tennessee
luhama aud Mississippi
The epidemic ALSO continues in the
u.idl" wDu Louisville and I'VE
other cities in Kentucky have many
urN rs.ns. while Indiana yesterday
rpOrfnl it.N new cases outside ol
IudHIIuulI where The disease r.
pldruI. THr malldy also continues
70 Illinois AND Michigan. while ohio
ported ih1t 30 D. prevalent iu thin.
..u 0ifrs ul that state
l;ca'hc, Epidemic Stages
H uuri reported epidemics IN Soy.
H cities colorado in seven cities
.uI kluHbs BOO .oyeu cities aud many
puuU. The disease ~as reported
rom .iN cities and several counties
% Sew Mexico The epidemic also
wide prnud 100 Arizona
Idaho reported new cases from live
I'l' south Dakota reported the
'i."as' throughout th" state. Wyom
uT rp0und 500 cases during the
1st Nr't. Montana r'poried . .U0O
.rw cases during fhr week ending
lrfuh.r o. Although influenza
uae. 100 army camps increased
lightly The number nf pneumonia
I.r. IHH decreased during tho
thour period ending today az
.unu D'aibs were 6lg against $50 f.
r.i'fisH Influenza cases report
d from 900 camps since The epidemic .
.'rIu nov total 1855. pneumonia .
I... t't|s. and deaths 1861
Amarillo daily news. [volume] (Amarillo, Tex.) 19??-current, 1918-10-19
rmpmnril, Quit. ke~ping Recor,i..
ha....fafssf 800


90. r\SO oct Us Efforts OF the
alnh department to keep record
fhe Spanish influenza cases we're
mpprlIi., abandoned TODAY boz.
II.r tHv doctors we're su uycrWurk
I'd ffry tiH not have time ip report
Ihr epidemic o. uuv conferred
fhe ~ vUu quarter Nine death,
.ufrrI there TODAY
IHUT Urrr seven deaths tt tur
'Hr H' Is hospital iu fh. past
a.HI.."rr hours and mine death.
nr. reported from Iuarpf Opposite
Sight InI iay military fuusr
continue .H hr HrIi aul ths lI.
i"r fHr posi- and surrounding
uH ..f .HHfHrf. med
Amarillo daily news. [volume] (Amarillo, Tex.) 19??-current, 1918-10-19
THEIR COLONEL SHOT

lie VAS nearly 20 heaisgs-'srs
vkss = usriao cane r1zzlrE d1Ta
TIE stree. 80 80 vt -. 80
colonel Ia l @ Hr rts
iug % q frel a.lss -ul
Geld .lst e. srE ~ fwaga &c
Amarillo daily news. [volume] (Amarillo, Tex.) 19??-current, 1918-10-19

Dams. Jolly % The marines
~ ous . The a,s,.uue rest.
ltnts ...l him Doe A. they
vent ag -r The enemy .a 'h5
glorious fsl.ug iu the tut Few
ds,. % summer be wslt fIth
THEA And when more thau one
wu.ujed marine woke up ia hospi-
Gal le asked '.aightuay
loss nl.' pid he come
through al rlht4
That's hos they feel about the
Dos what's ulra, they are very
proud ~ him For when The fsat
VA hottest Del helped drag a
s'-.' her acrc.s a shell swept feid
70 brins ha,l th..r colonel who
vas hing iu an exposed trsach bis
si.a.te sh.'. - by machine gan
-
he aii i'. Co., while he Ter lcg
vaf illl fr04 shell shock aud
o. .o.il ha.i.. look al his ieft
hand Or the na'n thar VS. in 70
Hu asuitut ury - he marines
astU toas a fnliaf al 'or him'
r-a.s lls Do feels abol, a.
Amarillo daily news. [volume] (Amarillo, Tex.) 19??-current, 1918-10-19
MI, Ma, Pa, In Rack ,ri.

N....H..I Does
IIH. 5000 ur Dis Rack ,lrff
HH H. refuge OF chicago chit
RON Hf r..E .s fH. result Ola police
-I.r .HI TODAY ls another step
.Hs..inE 8 prsld of influenza
Hr. r IH. Ilt Health CommIss.
HHs. Robertson directed % general
cremation .. lf..1roans with anti
.urs 'r.eI Hi Police Alroeks or
r |.r..'ra that policemen shoe an
.I.r.H .U fhs street. and d.spcrsc
r. CORNER gatherings aud CROW a
a Sind.
Report. received today Tor tWsn-
f.uHf hour. showed au increase IN
aihs aut decrease IN new cases
Influenza anf pneumonia The
CURES Nrrf Nfw eases influenza.
$40 pneumonia fo2 decrease. -
Deaths influenza 1fs. pneumonia.
81. inrrra.F. %
Amarillo daily news. [volume] (Amarillo, Tex.) 19??-current, 1918-10-19

az New - ru,,o.
~ Asnriaisd Pres.

SAN FRANCISCO. Oct IN Six
hundred aud fourteen now cases of
spanish influenza we're reported Ca
health authorities TODAY. bringing
'h's ciiN.s total goo 34sI cases.
twenty deaths Uerr reported. maxi
inE e total uf srtpuu to date
Amarillo daily news. [volume] (Amarillo, Tex.) 19??-current, 1918-10-19
DOC HANGS ON sRAvELY

tut SO they waited. aud waited,
ore tlrr two hours The doctor
looked a. his watch--it was after
-'.ht o'clock
'Cr.s we'd better make the
rr.st. be said.
They ro' tho colonel on tho
lt.a.,he- aud started Half way
rcr.ss tho FIELD the Docs leg went
ba d Ca him and he had TO let 90
his hold on the s'r-t.Aer BE- 10
TO-. D % again IN a minute o. two
CO t-lg on untn tho colonel waA
Comfortable "a bed In the sick
bay
After that the Doc wasn't exact.
D. safe " bat happened he though,
BE- was gp.ng 20 stay with the
marines. bIt when be got out OF
'fe canton "a which hs had been
i...t,i % ride by his major As
vas iu front - hotel IN Paris.
I didn't want 20 come back" he
'rlf ir interviewer 4 wanted 20
STAY with my battalion. nui they
TIA ne rs rather badly sho, IN
end 'hsy guessed ID better wait
g while ur,n "a reformed and
-e-av fcr al'l1n again"
Pc flmhicl IN hls poke, ana
drew OUT shrapnel bullet sliEht.
~ 1stcned on one side.
That struck between the colonel
ard h,s orderly willis We we're In
the trsrch." 10 sald. 4, hi a
stone AoIrded and fell q short dis.
lance away picked u up. ana
vhsnevsr show q 7 think % n.
c-nsriy--s brave. manly f.Ilov-
Who SO killed BY q piecs % ahsIi
witch struck him "a the side and
sE,lotsi he cartridges lie vas !.
-a-ryi-g-
70 Tcalin't aini; Il but thsrs
e 2 t-lsf IA; be VII think also 4
'or - proved himself : sull
@' rs rl'-'ce And n knCxs thai
20 SD rsvsr BE- slowed 20 loss -
: ARE. Dc.
Amarillo daily news. [volume] (Amarillo, Tex.) 19??-current, 1918-10-19

clfy announces that IA will be- fore
ed 10 saspend pubiioat0n because Of
the depletion Do the tanks of their
emplOYe Four BIZ bred empioyes
~ the central Pos 0ice and 1900
clerks IN one depa rtnent store and
oHe.har 0f The polirenen ~ the city
are ill
Reports received from Chile indi-
cate that an extremely grave cpl
demio exists there. ain a large per
ceniaRe ct deaths De- some neigh
borhO0d- OF santiago. Chile deaths
number three out 0f very ten per
souH arferfrd
Amarillo daily news. [volume] (Amarillo, Tex.) 19??-current, 1918-10-19
Iowa Governor ~ Win Innucu.a.

A...nI.I rrsss
uEa MONIES. Iowa. oct Is
.HN So Harding. 100 with Spanish
HNuarf B.. 80 no danger ~ cOmpli-
l'|Hu. h.. physicians said late to
aF predicting his recovery within
hfN N hours
Amarillo daily news. [volume] (Amarillo, Tex.) 19??-current, 1918-10-19
TRY A NEWS WANT AD
Doctor was with him and in urgent

Doctor was with him and In urgent
Lesd VI help
Shouting ~ another marine. mo
DC ran over 20 the sick bay.
grabbed a siretches and started in
thr direction In which the courier
hal pointed. II Nss al least thrsa
huudred Yards across the field.
slipers We're plentiful. and shells
Wt.e dropping all about. Down on
ia'ir st0mechs went the Dos aud
tie marine. Pushing the stretchsr
ahead. they wrlggled and crAwled
through tie stubble 10 the trench.
They found the colonel Nith The
do tor and tho cOl0uels orderly.
The colonel was weak from loss Of
blood The doctor said that they
mast get him cut N soon - pos.
s'..r But the shells were coming
TOO last and the snipsrs bullets
v.re whis'l'ng TOO ominously for
az Immediate getaway
rnrapuel alsO. was failing IN the
trench. The orderly put himself
te'wecn his colonel aud the enemy
f-,.
Amarillo daily news. [volume] (Amarillo, Tex.) 19??-current, 1918-10-19
Weakness {, Noted.

Au important weakness noted iu
thr emperor lespcrat" efforts 10
save hi- throne - his determination
rp t.su lhD Austrian Poles ont Of an
independent Poland The Poles OF
Austria lr" l- determined 10 Join
their fellow DnunirymHn boo establish
ur 900 independent government Of
Poland Dor. Dlecho-Sloydks are OF
becoming entirely ree The lugo-
~.at. ip rnf want autonomy under
iiJp. bura rule and Roumauia is cry
Inr 0ul ro fhp world tor reunion. not
restoration This would leave
Germany. Austria aud Magyar Hun
gary Nih fhr latter apparently In
fH, Hlflo tn constitute m. empire.
Amarillo daily news. [volume] (Amarillo, Tex.) 19??-current, 1918-10-19

taaa I'D rr-ss
nl FNOs AlnES Oci IA There
~ fuo hundred thousand Eases %
Hf'uHnfa iH nuenna Aires The med
cal authorities say that the disease
q. not spanish Influenza Thsfe
fate been uo deaths fran 10
Several 20 the newspaper % ne
Amarillo daily news. [volume] (Amarillo, Tex.) 19??-current, 1918-10-19

N... Hftd rrra
rNN FNNNCiSCO. oct lS-Ail
uolfI's aud motion picture houses
I fh. state we're ordered closed to
ay hN fbr state hoard ~ health -
result nf the spanish influenza epi-
ruI. schools and churches will
.Waiu open except in cities WHARF
r', already have been closed BY In.
Oh authorities. the board annuunC
4
Amarillo daily news. [volume] (Amarillo, Tex.) 19??-current, 1918-10-19

B'unos Aire. "r11 air has a
population Of approximately 1900
900. Thanks tO tn freai drainage
system iu the city vsfuions N cpl
denies have been traily unknown
Zoe recent years
Amarillo daily news. [volume] (Amarillo, Tex.) 19??-current, 1918-10-19
WAR AHtNTT MITTN
10 Dl~tt~~ kN~NI


Wy Nsf'. iHitd frss
tDFINllhGEN saturday, Or
DO The German war cabinet met
at o'ti"ct Bst evening to decide
the definite form of th" German au-
.Wrr iH President Wilson
Paw The Preside tut
Amarillo daily news. [volume] (Amarillo, Tex.) 19??-current, 1918-10-19

Telephone Num- Electric Co,
number ~, for Edison Mazda
Lamps.
Amarillo daily news. [volume] (Amarillo, Tex.) 19??-current, 1918-10-19
THe -roc~ A PREACHER

e. home tue Doc q he Rev John
H Dlnr ru last Pal be sas
as'or ~ the FI-st Baptist Church
T-scon t-if He lsfi the church
"a FRANCE for the Y. y e A.
cd flts last December be has
srl slikiAg vith The AnsTilAn
Amarillo daily news. [volume] (Amarillo, Tex.) 19??-current, 1918-10-19
WASHINGTON WATTS
FOR GERMAN REPLY
To WILSON s NOTE
Confined from PAGE -

least one more trial or bargaining
was to boz expected so another note
g. looked f0r as soon az those IN
power It Berlin decide that they arc
In @ position fD make proposal like
Iy either fo receive consideration or
POO cau.ea $500 boz the allied camp and
.frrneiheu rho situation af home.
Amarillo daily news. [volume] (Amarillo, Tex.) 19??-current, 1918-10-19

MOTTO-Stand behind the
President Buy Liberty
Bonds.
Amarillo daily news. [volume] (Amarillo, Tex.) 19??-current, 1918-10-19

The attitude In Washington is one
of confident Whiting for The break
THAT ultimately must come. even
though another winter and spring
.campaign may be- necessary Every
one watching The western front
The great retreat pf the Germans
t1er. s being carried out without
naturalization indicating that dis
ciplue aud Agit b. .iill len in the
ti..ra war machine Or s realiz-
cd that .trre.afgl stand before The
German border Frr reached may
govern fhc tome 90 The next diplo-
matte campaign aud xiv" 10" war
lords another period of grace
what rs happening boz Austria
Hungary observed with interest
though o. b. regarded as ot second
ay Importance Emperor Charles
proclamation q. liberalization of Aus
fr.a. officials remarked today b. q
frp u fhp right direction though u
does NOT materially change the sit
ua'iou generalization cannot save
b. dual monarchy In the first
place fur allies tro committed 90 ac-
uul independence uf the Czecho-Slo-
gaEa constituting very large part
uf Austria and Iu ne second the
llungariau- holding fhe upper hand
nov Boo fb' dual monarchy and show
ing nu disposition tp relinqush their
position have been the chief offend
"rs loo fHr sppr"- ION Of subject ma
fluullfIes
Amarillo daily news. [volume] (Amarillo, Tex.) 19??-current, 1918-10-19

IfV1FR or TINE Associated

EFWHFR or THE ASSOCIATED
Pin
The Associated Press IL srelu-
,fgsIF entitled 20 tha use Tor .ebub-
u.aN.u az nu ueas dispa' hos
credited 10 o. or not other is"
credited IN this paper aud also rho
b.aI ueus published herein
AH rights ~ rem i.l.tfian ~ spec
iaI Dol patches hsrslu .fa also ~
served
Amarillo daily news. [volume] (Amarillo, Tex.) 19??-current, 1918-10-19

.G-ruln a.I.r
r Dah.. uHp1p..r r.
'H ODD. r.r.. .H public
Amarillo daily news. [volume] (Amarillo, Tex.) 19??-current, 1918-10-19

ny carrier 10 Amrti'S zoe the
month
Amarillo daily news. [volume] (Amarillo, Tex.) 19??-current, 1918-10-19

Telephones 775-+7i.
as West fifth strssl
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1918-09-03
VICTOR NOW LOVED
War Has Brought Popularity to Italy's
kina.

The war has cast some kings down
from their thrones and held up others
to the scorn OF the world. But II has
also made some honored and beloved,
not by their own people only but BY
millions Of citizens Of other coun-
tries King Albert Of Belgium Is one:
King Victor Of Italy Is another. Vic
tor has not the imposing presence and
heroic bearing Of Albert, but his soul
has risen nobly to the occasion.
The extreme democracy Of Italy.
says Mr. Herbert Vivian In Italy at
War;" has always expressed itself In
the freest criticism OF the monarchy.
During the agitation OF May. 1915.
when many persons feared that Italy
might shrink from war, the name Of
King Victor Emmanuel III was fire.
quently taken In vain. The press pub
lished impudent caricatures and open
ly accused him Of being swayed by
Austrian sympathizers.
Poor little man! So small, and
rather alone! He has a splendid
wife. worthy daughter of the old lion
OF Montenegro. and he finds much
homely happiness in his sturdy fam
ly. But he has been the subject of
many sights and much Indifference:
indeed. only in Italy is 1t known how
near he was exiled in May. 1915.
But the time for pity has gone by.
and the king Is now by far the most
popular man in the kingdom. He is
almost a dwarf. with a coloriess face
slightly bronzed by the elements, a
crisp. manly voice, and a way of
laughing with his eyes. He stands
erect, with his short legs wide apart.
His hair Is beginning to grow gray.
and there are burrows on his forehead
and beside his mouth. yet he bears
himself like q. young man. walking
fast and never firing. He speaks little
and simply. always to the point, look
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1918-09-03
AS DOYLE SEES 1T.
Wants Germany to Pay Whole Cost
of the War.

Wants Germany to Pay Whole Cos.
of the War.
Sir Arther Conan Doyle contributes
an article to the London Evening STAN
dard under the caption Peace Must
Be Signed at Potsdam-Germany's
Coming Crisis-Prospects Of a Deba-
Gle or Revolution" He said:
THE war will change very suddenly
from the appearance of a close-drawn
struggle to an absolute German de-
feat.
There are only three absolute es-
sential conditions Of a satisfactory
peace. The first is that Germany shall
be invaded. Too long has she been led
to suppose she Is inviolata This de-
fusion must be shattered.
THE second is the occupation Of Ber-
lin and the signing Of the peace treaty
in Potsdam in the very hall in which
the plan was hatched.
-The third and most important Is
that Germany must pay to the last
penny the expenses her outrageous
conduct has cost the. Allies This
Is both policy and justice. She can
prepare no other war while she has
such a debt. She will need no army
or navy. In 1915 she planned to exact
four thousand millions from France
alone.
"a revolution could emily bring the
Social Democrats to the top. THESE
people have a small minority and
have in the main sustained the Ger
man attack against their neighbors.
We owe them no consideration. Who
ever shall rule Germany will inherit
the fruits of her criminal conspiracy
against the world"
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1918-09-03
TWICE PROVEN

III YOU suffer backache. sleepless
nights, tired. dull days and distressing
urinary disorders. don't experiment
Read this twice told testimony. It's
York enthusiastically proven:
]. o. Robinson, s. Congress Ave.
gave the following ststement March
%. 1911: Il found Doan's Kidney
Pills were mighty fine when l mad oc,
casion to use them some time ago:
am glad to recommend them. MY
kidneys were out Of order and my
back ached. I suffered terribly on
that account. / saw Doan's Kidney
Pills advertised at the York. Drug
Store. and got some Of them. Doans
soon gave me complete relief ana l
have had no trouble since
NEARLY SEVEN YEARS LATER,
Mr.. Robinson added: The cure Doans
Kidney Pills gave me some time ago
has been lasting and ! haven't had
any occasion TO use them since. III
tell YOU this medicine certainly Is re-
liable and am glad to haze you use
my former statement"
SOC at all dealers. Foster-Milburn
Co, Mfgrs., Buffalo. n. Y.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1918-09-03
Humorous department

All. Sufficient Reason.-A very
pompous army surgeon was sent 10
recruiting depot in the Highlands 70
examine a batch Of lads who had TAX
On the kings shilling. The abrupt
oyerbearing Of the doctor 80 frighten-
ed one recruit that he was unable TO
answer the first question as to his
name and place Of birth.
Why don't you answer" roared
the doctor. What's your name. !
say"
still the panic stricken lad could
only stare open -mouthed at MS
questioner, who exclaimed:
why / believe the fellows stone
deaf" And. taking his watch from his
pocket. he held it to the left ear OF the
recruit, saying: Can you hear that
ticking
The youtf. shook his head. The
watch was applied 70 the other ear
with the same effect. and then the doc
tor opened the walls Of his Indignation
on the head OF the would be soldier
What do you mean by enlisttng
when you are stone deaf? Why. you
can't hear the ticking Of . watch when
it's held within an inch Of the drum
OF your ear"
And then the worm turned.
she's no gaun." said the recruit
finding his tongue at last.
And when the doctor holding the
watch TO his own ear. found that II
had indeed stopped. his feelings were
too powerful to be expressed in words
extensive though his vocabulary ordi-
narily was.-Tit- Bits.