davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1918-06-04

Liver Tone for few cents under my
personal money back guarantee that
each spoonful will clean your sluggish
liver better than a dose of nasty calomel
and that il won't make you sick.
Dodsons Liver Tone is real liver
medicine. You'll know it next morning
because you will wake up feeling fine,
your liver will be working headache
and dizziness gone stomach will be
sweet and bowels regular.
Dodson's Liver Tone is entirely vege-
table, therefore harmless and cannot
salivate. Give it to your children Mil
lions of people are using Dodson's Liv-
er Tone instead of dangerous caomcl
now. Your druggist will tell you that
the sale of calomel is almost stopped
entirely here. (Adv)
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1918-06-04

81 saw you coming out of butcher
shop this morning, Mrs. Brown Doesn't
your family observe meatless days."
"Oh, yes, we observe it scrupulously.
but of course we can't let poor little
Fido suffer was buying meat for
him "
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1918-06-04

born in New York City, 40 years ago
today
Peter F. Tague. representative in
congress Of the Tenth Massachusetts,
district. born in Boston, ~ years ago
today.
Catherine Waugh Mccullough of Iii
nois, the first woman to be chosen as
a presidential elector, born at Ransom
willie, N. Y. So years ago today.
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1918-06-04
Problems
81 tie Heart
S9/Mr Hzzlh7F 2zSxa5JtW

n EAR MRS, THOMPSON: (D /
- am engaged to young man who
is expecting to be called in the
draft any time ! do not think we
should think of marriage before h
leaves, do youp
(2) have no engagement ring and
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1918-06-04

DO you break these sets1" asked the
shopper in the chinaware department
mo. I'm sorry to say we don't madam"
replied the polite salesman, but if you
keep a servant girl she will probably
do it for you. Town Topics.
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1918-06-04
Our Daily Birthday Party.

Thomas d. Schall, the bind congress.
man from Minnesota, born at Reed
City. Mich, Al years ago today.
Rev. Charles Stelzle, director of the
campaign of the federal council of
churches against the LIQUOR traffic.
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1918-06-04
Fifty Years Ago Today.
One Year Ago TODAY in the war

June a. l9l7-General BrusiloQ sue
ceeded General Alexeff as commander
in chief of the Russian armies; final
instructions issued to local boards for
registration of men of military age un-
der the selective draft law.
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1918-06-04

The Sioux Indian women OF III,
Standing Rock reservation in North
Dakota have organised a Red Cross
auxiliary.
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1918-06-04

Coal week is not . holiday. II IL
week Of business.
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1918-06-04

The victorious British troops during
the advance on Jericho discovered
skeleton which ahd been blown from It,
tomb by she'll and reported to Lon
don that the find was believed TO be
the remains of John of Antioch.
Cannot trace John OF Antioch" came
the reply. Send identification disk"
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1918-06-04
silence to jealousy and think ,hst I &
were too angry about ths girl 10 wsl14

silence to Jealousy and think shst n
we're too angry about ths siri 70 w5(l1
sidered right for girls 10 40 with Sovs
who drink u they act all right arouS
Dear Mrs. Thompson; 4 Il con-
the sirlsi They are considerei nice
boys In the neighborhood.
CARRIE.
Girls should not 20 with boys who
drink, There are so many fin, BOYS
who do not that II is unwise for girls
to waste their time with boys who can
never mean anything to them because
Of that very bad and usele. habit
Besides. girls cannot be too careful Of
their regulations.
Dear Mrs. Thompson: We are two
girls both IS years old. Do YOU think
we are too young to 70 10 dances with.
out chaperon II our parents do not
objeot' CHUMS.
You are too young TO 90 to dance,
without a chaperon.
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1918-06-04
~

One Hundred Years Ago Today.
l8l8-The general synod of the Re
formed Church met in New York City.
Seventy-Five Years Ago Today.
l&3-Charles {. Abbott celebrated
naturalist and author, born at Trenton,
N J.
Fifty Years Ago Today.
l868-Gen Irwin Mcdowell assumed
his duties as commander of the Fourth
military district.
Twenty-Five Years Ago Today.
R95-Duke of Edinburgh, second
son Of Queen Victoria, was made ad-
miral of the British fleet
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1918-06-04

river remaining normal for this season
OF the year.
J w Bennett, superintendent Of the
wsterwork' stated this morning that no
damage from rise is expected to re.
suit at the new dam. A several foot
rise would put the river over much OF
the bottom land in the south part Of
the city. he said
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1918-10-26
WANTED-Ro0MS.

SOUTHERN WOMAN. In ONCE. desires room
and board with private family in Mt. pleasant
car section. Phone North 5102.
WAR WORKER wants one large room or two
small adjoining rooms. plainly but neatly fur
Rished. with or without board, for wife, small
children and self; IL without board, near good
boarding house; prefer private family home,
and. IL desired, will care for own rooms.
Address Box 1o9-C, Star ONCE. stating termSs
Pc.
TWO FURNISHED ROOMS: Ink; young
married couple. Address Box &c. Star Once
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1918-10-26
BUSINESS OPPORTUNITIES.

50, 900 PEE month will consider combining with
another company. To add our equipment and
overhead and show . splendid profit. II you are
in this business get in touch with me. Address
BOX 13-C Star Office, 27s
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1918-10-26

FOR REET-GARAGES.
STORAGE ROOM FoR u AUroMoBILEsL
Concrete floor, wide alley and eatranee; viii
b ready on the LIST of November. Apply als-
ess G 81. N.W.-sPACE FOR ONE CAR. 27s
GARAGE FOR RENT FOR ONE Or TWO
cars or for one large truck; SIS. Phone Col.
1031.W. 1919 v NV. 2Ts
LARGE DOUBLE GARAGE JUST COM
pleted. rear Poll Kslorama nd. NV: SIS. The
Warrington Loan and Trust Co., Real Estate
dept.
GARAGE FOR RENT. ONE on TWO CABS.
Apply S25 18th st. NV, saeond door. 27e
HAVE SPACE FOR 4 FEW MORE CARS.
ARMY AND NAVY GARAGE. 1120 18th Ut.
nv. Phone YFasklia 1000.
WANTED-GARAGES.
a1R4aE-NnAR ONTARIO APT. PHONE
Col. 800. Apt. s22. q
WANTEDIGARAGE On SPACE FOR
Dodge roadster; near 18th and Clifton SITS.
Address Box l40-C. Star sdlce. 29e
FOR MEDIUM SIZED CAR; NEAR 18th AND
Buchanan SITS. nv. WALTER B. GUY. SIG
Weo9ward building. 26e
NEAR 18th AND 8 SITS. N.W-Space for
Buick roadster. Gail Col. 710s-W. 27s
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1918-10-26
EVENING STAR ROUTE in
the northwest section; good OPP
portunity for the right man.
Apply Circulation Manager.
::

FOR LEASE or sails a fully stocked and well
equipped delicatessen and lunchroom, centrally
located, with daily gross receipts Of approxi-
mately 80; easy terms. Apply after $50 2. m.
111S r at NV 27s
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1918-10-26

1913 FORD R0ADsTER, demountabls rims;
sorbers, ETC.; run only 800 miles. 1013 9th st.
NV. 27s
1si1 auPAOBILD roadster; Afst-ciass condi-
Mon snd appearance. 1913 9th NV. Phone
1917 PAIGE six-cyiinder fonfin9 car: fuil
equipment, including bumpers and snubbers;
price, N,100. Address Box 25s-B. Star once.
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1918-08-10
THEIR WINTER IN NEW YORK.
BY Grace Simcoke.

The Sherwoods lived in an apart
ment in New York The Thorton
Boarding school was to start Sep
TENDER 80, and it was now the 22d
Of that month. Mr.. Sherwood had
decided that the girls, Frances and
Gwendolyn, were to go to the board
ing school so they were now sewing
away to prepare for school,
The day came when they were
to start. The school was about six
miles from their apartment SO they
rad to go on the train. Every
weekend they came home to visit
their parent. They often brought
friend with them.
The winter months flew quickly
by and they had many good time
at school. When summer came
they went to the seashore again
and Gwendolyn was able to take
part in all of the sports.
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1918-08-10
THE EXPLANATION,

The attack made the other night
by the Germans on Bouresches,
which the American troops were
holding. was so violent that the
worst was feared. A report was
received that the town had been
occupied by the Germans and a
major was sent down from head
quarters to ascertain the facts. He
fell in with the officer who had
been entrusted with the defense
of the village.
Are the Boches in Bouresches? ?"
he inquired hastily.
Yes sir" was the reply.
There was a lurid interlude and
the staff officer was then under
stood to say:
Was it not the order that no
Germans were to. be allowed to
remain in Bouresches!"
Yes sir"
"Then, why the deuce have you
left them there?" was demanded.
Burying party not yet arrived,
sir" was the quiet answer.
Finally reaching very attrac-
tive restaurant that rainy morn
ing, | entered and took quiet seat
near the door. | was still very
full of troubles, so bending my
head | was making the most of
the situation when | suddenly real
lied that my feet were becoming
more and more wet. and looking
down on the floor discovered that
pool was collecting very rapidly
AT first | could not understand
what was the matter, but after
looking about the room | saw the
cause. A distressed groom, with
his bride who evidently was very
disdainful. was having troubles
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1918-08-10
NO DIFFERENCE

Little Tommy came home from
Sunday school one day in a very
thoughtful mood. Finally. looking
at his mother, he said
Mother, don't you think that I've
been good boy since I've been
going to Sunday school,"
"Why, yes, Tommy. certainly"
replied his mother.
Don't you think that you could
trust me now, mother"
"Of course do; but why do you
ask, Tommy"
"Oh, nothin'," said the boy, "only
I was wenderin' why you kept the
cookies locked up just the same as
you did before l went to Sunday
school. Contributed
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1918-08-10

What are you thinking about,
Harry" she asked in pleasing
tone.
Mother told me-" piped the little
fellow. mot to take two oranges,
and l was thinking that I would be
lucky if | got one"
A SAFE BET.
1t was at the dinner table and
the hostess addressed her hus-
bands brother.
DO have another piece of pie,
William"
Why really I've already had two
pieces: but it is so good | think l
will have another"
"Ha, ha!-mother's winner"
said little Frank, excitedly. "She
said she'd bet you'd make pig of
yourself. Ruth Critchett.
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1918-08-10
q SCRAPS FRO" Se oLp KIT xr7' BAG 60

pounded series OF technical Ques-
tons the other day to group Of
feminine drivers. He says the re-
suits were amazing. No affidavit
accompanies his report, but he's
supposed to be person of I'M
questioned veracity.
Here are his questions and some
Of the answers he says he got:
q, If your brakes failed to work
going down hill, what would you
do?
A. l would jump out and throw
rock under the wheels.
Q. Which side of car going in
the same direction must you pass?
A. Always pass on the safest
side.
Q. If your engine stalled on
car track, what would you do?
A. Telephone my husband to
come and fix it.
Q. When the car is standing,
which side should be next to the
curbing.
A. The side nearest the side
walk.
@. What precaution should be
taken in backing your car?
A. Reverse the engine.
9, What is the accelerator?
A. A thing that has something
to do with something inside the
car, when you step on it, or some
thing.
Q. When the batteries run out
! what must you do? A. Run after
them or get new ones.
@, Why must you keep grease
and oil off the wheels?
A. Because it gets your hands
and clothes dirty.
@. What is the office of the
spark plug?
A. The ONCE of the spark plug
! is the Office where it is made or
sold.
@. How far must you stop from
a fire hydrant?
A. Far enough not to scratch
the varnish.
Q. If your engine stalls going
up a hill. what do you do?
A. Try to start it.
@, What would you do if the
steering gear broke?
A. Drive to the nearest garage
and have the man fix it.
G. What is the speed limit in
the city? In the country?
! A. Not over forty miles an hour
in the city. Slower in the country,
because the roads are bad
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1918-08-10
NO WONDER.

"How do you like your new neigh
bor?"
mot a Bit" said woman who
was trying a little boys hat on.
"You see they don't like children
"How do you know"
"Well. they hurt Johns feelings
terribly when he throws stones at
their dog or turns the hose on their
windows. They looked at him real
cross"
Ruth Critchet, Warner school.
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1918-08-10
HE WAS WELL, ALL RIGHT.

Mrs. Smith. Il m aITaIu tnaI IT
have to quit giving Tommy that
tonic the doctor left for him
Mr.. Smith: "Why, isn't he any
better?"
Mrs. Smith: ooh. yes, but he has
slid down the bannister six times
this morning. broken the hall lamp,
Two vases, a pitcher and looking
glass. | don't feel that | can stand
it much longer"
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1918-08-10
A Groom Was Having Troubles.
JOKES.

A teacher told the children the
equator was an imaginary line run
ming around the earth.
The next day when little boy
was asked what the equator was
he said that it was an managerle
lion that had gotten loose and was
running around the earth.-Ruth
Critchet
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1918-08-10

Little Johnny went to bed one
night without saying his prayers
and his mother. said, Johnny why
aren't you saying your prayers"'
He answered, Because I'm get
ting tired praying for the whole
family. Grace Simcoke.
Gladys" said Mr.. Cumrox,
what's the idea of these extrava-
CANT clothes and the face make
up?"
1--WE can't ignore the fachion. l
don't want to be thought differen
and conspicuous"
Maybe it's AL right. But it
does seem to me that in peace
able community theirs no need for
so much camouflage." Washing
ton Star
what is that noise?" asked lit
tie James,
Out walking in the park.
"That noise you hear" his father
said,
as just the dogwood's bark"
"And tell me why the dogwoods
bark"
He urged, with such to-do!"
Il think" his father said, They
hear
The pussy-willows new"
Cleveland Leader.
A man who Kept a small shop
was waiting on a single customer
one morning. His little boy and he
were alone at the time. and the
shopkeeper was obliged to go up
stairs for some change. Before
doing so he whispered to the little
chap to watch the customer to see
that he didn't steal anything.
Very soon the proprietor re-
turned with the necessary change,
and the boy sang out: He didn't
steal anything, Pa; l watched him. "
Contributed.
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1918-08-10
REWARD.

Fifty dollars reward for a lost
boy carrying on his back an empty
bag. containing three railroad tun-
nels and an augerhole, and a monk
ey wrench. When seen last he was
up in a ballon shoveling wind off
of the courthouse steeple. He was
born day before tomorrow, thirteen
years ago
Elizabeth Estelle,
Ill North Third street.
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1918-08-10

Father" said little Harry excit-
eddy. there is a large black bug
on the ceiling"
Harry's father. who is profess
sor. was busy reading at the time,
and he answered, without raising
his eyes from his book: "Step on 1t
and leave me alone. "-Contributed.
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1918-08-10
NOTHING TO US.
In GOOD COMPANY.

Judge: "Ain't you ashamed to be
here so often?'
Booty Bill: why. bieSs your
Honor, this place is quite respect
able ter some places I've been
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1918-08-10
NO HOPE.

A charming hostess was enter
tanning a party of children. when
she discovered one little fellow sit
ting over in a corner. apparently
lost in thought
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1918-08-10

the doctor teils me, so that | might
have recovered without any diff
Guilty. But the trouble arose when
they suddenly came in contact with
great vacuum which drew the in
struments right out of their hands,
and since they could not get the
things in any way, they at last were
forced to sew up my head again.
leaving the tools inside.
While | was lying perfectly quiet,
| did not notice the inconvenience,
but since | am now able to sit up
and even walk around a little bit,
they rattle about SO horribly that
feel like a human Ford coming
down the pike.
Please write me a little letter at
once, dear cousin Lucy, telling me
what all the Pugnose family is 40
ing. Until it comes, am,
Yours, in head rafting misery,
Sammy Stay-at-Home.
BY David Henderson.
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1918-08-10

also, for the waiter was insisting
upon the payment of a bill which
was making the miserable man
drip quarts OF PRECIPITATION over
the room.
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1918-08-10
Monday.

aIa going up to the station MASTER,
l asked him where was.
Richmond, SIR" he grumbled in
such short, sharp tone. l scarcely
could understand at all "Rich-
mond, Wayne county, State OF In
diana. Hoosier."
"Who's here" repeated, glaring
at him with all the outraged in
dignation l could show. why,
I'm here for one"
He looked at me, seemingly in
surprise for a minute, and then,
lifting his eyebrows, ne said, as
sarcastically as he could, "Oh, are
you all tere?"
And then walked away.
Going out of the station I saw
a very charming lady standing un-
der the pliers of the depot's porch.
and since l always like to learn the
general standing of my location
approached her with very deep
bow. and said:
Madame, can you tell me the
population of this city,?
Population" she repeated, with
a puzzled look, II don't understand
what you mean"
1.-THE population. the number OF
people in the city" explained.
"Why, l couldn't tell YOU" she
answered. Really, I've never
stopped to count them"
Going elong until I came to de-
hghtfully shaded church yard.
where reighboring corn tassles
were swaying gently in the breeze,
giving = patriotic and at the same
time rustic air, pitched camp,
preparing to spend a peaceful night.
No sooner had I settled down,
however. than a frightful uproar of
squalks arose above me. | went
out to investigate, and found that
the orchestra was a well organized
band Of black birds who continued
to serenade me periodically
through the night.
Those black birds surely must
have been made in Germany.
Towards morning it began to
rain, and when came out OF my lit
tie tent, | was confronted with a
delightful swimming pool.
"Ah," l thought, What a re-
freshing morning swim awaits me"
But as | diyed in head first. !
came into such forcible contact
with very firmly pressed bricks,
that saw one large yellow star.
My swimming pool" found was
only one of the many holes in the
rough sidewalk.
Later l tried to go down town
for my breakfast. II only had
been fortunate enough to Ge horse
or mule, or even four wheeled
Ford. could have glided smoothly
along on the best asphalt street in
the city. But since l merely be-
longed to the poor taxpaying class.
l leaped from high point to high
point in the vain endeavor to keep
the water out of my high-topped
boots.
Little girl: Mother, will Char
ley Chaplin go to heaven when he
dies?"
Mother: Eyes, dear. l suppose
he will. Why"
Little girl; MY, but won't Jesus
laugh"
Chicago Tribune.
Sammy Stay-at Home, the other
day. was confronted by very wit
ty man who tried to catch him on
an old riddle.
what has four eyes and yet
cant see." said the man, smiling
to himself to think how Sammy
never could guess mississippi"
why. this potato here in my
pocket" answered the Sergeant
putting his nose up in the air. and
walking away.
David Henderson.
Nohope Saniarium.
Punk Luck Camp,
Richmond, Ind.
Lucy Pigail Pugnose,
Fish Hoo, Ave,
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1918-08-10

Q. Why was Eve made?
A. For Adams Express Com
pany.
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1918-08-10
NEVER BE A LE;jDEH%.

A little boy who was on the train
had very bad cold and as he was
suffering very much, lady who
was in the seat behind his asked
If he had handkerchief.
yes said the boy, Il have. but
| don't lend it to everyone.
NOTHING TO US.
81 see in the papers the Germans
are shooting a ton of lead in a
single shot
THAT is nothing our boys are
shooting Teutens" 1.-TWO tons).
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1918-08-10

Lucy Pigail Pugnose,
Fish Hoo, Ave,
.Pennsyltucky.
My Dear Cousin Lucy:
As you see, am in Nohope San
itarium. and am having more trou-
bles than ! ever had in my whole
nine lives.
One of tie most wearisome
times | ever had was when ! was
operated on, last week, to see If
they could locate a missing brain.
No trace was found Of the brain
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1918-08-10

Sammy Stay-at-Home's father
was testing him in addition and he
gave him this problem. ''If you
had twenty-five cents, and l should
give you fifty cents, what would
you have?"
Sammy promptly answered, "A
iii" Lynn Brendel.
New Mexico state record. (Santa Fe, N.M.) 1914-19??, 1918-10-25

ing of wheat and Shelled corn. The.
actual grading is done by licensed in
spectOrs who are not employed by the
department but operate either indie
prIdently from fees collected for their
services or are employed by CONNER
cial or state inspection departments.
The work of the inspectors is checked
W by representatives of the grain
supervision division of the bureau of
markets. which also maintains district
supervisors and serves as n court Of
appeals whenever grades assigned by
inspectors on interstate shipments are
questioned by growers or dealers. All
this organization assures that wheat
and shelled corr inspected by licensed
inspectors will be graded in accord
;ince with the same fixed standards
whether sold by country elevators, at
terminal markets or in foreign mar
kttS.
New Mexico state record. (Santa Fe, N.M.) 1914-19??, 1918-10-25
GOOD ANTI-FREEZE MIXTURE
Alcohol Solutions Are Cheap and e.
fective for Automobiles and
Other Engines.

The dairy farmer need not put u.
his automobile for the winter for fels
of the engine freezing, as it has been
found that alcohol solutions are cheap
and effective anti-freezing mixtures
for automobiles and other gasoline
engines. According to w. ives Of the
Ohio agricultural engineering depart
ment the strength Of the mixture fol
various temperatures is as follows
A 10 per CEN solution for 25 degrees
above; 20 per cent solution for 6 de.
grees above; 80 per cen solution for
temperature, and a IS per cent
solution for 10 degrees below. In case
a mixture Of 20 per cen alcohol
freezes, this simply forms a soft mush
which has no bursting power.