Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1918-07-29
War Is Making the World Smaller
By WALTER PRICHARD EATON

TADY GREGORY once wrote play called
II Spreading the News" which is an ex-
tremely amusing little comedy. and its
application is not confined to Ireland I
have always known, for instance, that right
in our own village little tiny story could
start out from in front of the postoff1ce at
mail time, 20 Jogging down our country
roads past the farmhouses and fields and
reach Brush Hill or the old North Parish
great big. whackins. juicy story. Its accumu
lation Of authentic detail and spicy incident
on the trip was always astounding.
DUT I never quite realized I think, how
- rapid the process Of growth could be
until the Franco American drive began above
the Marine. Then l saw the process of
spreading the news in all its beautiful per-
fection, and ultimately. arrived at the definite
physical law which guides the matter. This
is the law: The number of German pris-
oners varies directly as the square Of the
distance from the drug store
T LIVE, for instance, three miles and half
L from the drug store
We get our soda. tobacco. daily papers
water-elass. writing paper postcards. candy.
snowshoes novels and gossip at tie drug
store; we get about everything there-except
drugs What has become Of the od-fasr-
ioned drug store that used to put up pre-
scriptions':? ..r .. '-.
Now the square Of three and half is
what is it? Wait minute till l ask my
wife. Oh. yes--12A Accord
ingly, when 1000 German prisoners are cap
tured. the first farmer out from the village,
or the first one who comes past the Louise
who has been past the house Of somebody who
had been to the village pulls up his team
and asks me If I've heard the news. The
Yankees are through. yes. sir; got the Huns
on the run, captured more guns n they can
count and 10000 prisoners. (Actually, he
said, 10000. I fear according to my law he
should .have said something else, but I'm
not enough of a mathematician to reckon
what It's a good law. anyhow. and It's all
remember of physics.)
N/OU can ina gine, perhaps, the effect on
j my feelings when, at o'clock in. the
morning. just as am about to start opera
tions in the potato field a man comes by and
tells me the Allies tave broken through and
rolled up 10000 prisoners DO stop to
consider the source? do not Do l stop
to consider the welfare Of my potatoes? I
do not. I dron the spray, crank the car,
make a record trip 10 the drug store for
copy of the morning paper. sG7
And then find the news most gratifying,
fcations The Allies have not broken
through they have merely pushed in. They
have not captured 10000 prisoners, but only
1000. On the way back to my neglected
potatoes I reflect that my informant had
still two miles to drive, and i wonder how
many additional thousands Of Huns he
bagged on the way! II he would only drive
to the next town there. wouldn't be anything
left Of the Crown Princes army.
THE very next morning he went by again.
i This time knowing that the drive was on.
l had alrea ady been in to town and didn't
need to ask him the news But did just
for fun. '-1y
ITS soin' fine" he said. They're pustin'
EN- back STILL and rackin' in guns and pris-
oners Got most 10000 the paper said"
Not a blush as he said this, for he had
not even a memory of his yesterdays state
ment which has been based / presume, on
an excited glimpse of a headline. 1t was
the perfect unconsciousness of his exaggera-
ton that made it, in fact. such an excellent
example 4 ''g'4
VIYHEN you come to think Of IT., the some
w times despised and abused modern news
paper Eas some merit. When the r. #. D.
man brings me my papers from the post
| Office the headlines don't change bit on
the road. II the paper came OF the press
announcing 1000 prisoners. 1900 II rematns
until the breakfast ARE y ktnAied n ~
rsmo<est heunle(. VIM ~ iaat eppy. 1louo.
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