Sharp County record., 1918-03-22
Mr., SIMPK|NS PAYS .
HIS INCOME TAX
By ROBERT McBLAlR.

| Colonel Simpkins, who had -FOUR times
been promoted for valor during the
. Civil War and had died bravely on the
field of action. Mr.. Simpkins' throat
| ached now for two reasons: First, he
reverenced and adored the memory OF
his father; secondly, his age and his
eyes and his game leg wouldn't let MIN
70 to wGr himself. And as he observed
the martial bearing and uncompromis-
| ing gaze Of Colonel Simpkins he saw,
IN Imagination, the KHAKI! clad lads OF
the new generation marching forth and
crossing three thousand miles OF sea to
fight, maybe die, for liberty.
Mr.. Simpkins peered around to make
sure that neither Bess nor John (who
we're at the teasing ages Of sixteen
and seventeen) were where they could
see him, then be Strengthened: and
threw his right arm up for salute.
But his gouty shoulder twinged, and he
groaned. He couldn't even salute.
Damn 7! said Mr.. Slmpkins, and
with his other hand fercely twirled his
white mustachios.
He turned and limped into the IL
brary and sat down creakily before the
mahogany desk on which were lying
the blanks for his income tax state
ment, blanks which he had rather
grumplly got from the Internal Reve-
nue. officer only that day after lunch
eon on his way home from the club.
Mr.. Simpkins' income for 1917 had
amounted to just about $4,000, and he
lad been rather snappy on the sub
ect of taxes ever since he had discov.
nred that the more income man has
he greater the percentage of 1t he
rays in taxes. He could think of sew
aral men who, like himself, were mar
ried and had two children, and yet,
although their incomes we're nearly
half of his, they would pay only
small fraction of the amount he paid.
lie gloomily drew the blank nearer
md began filling In the information
hat 1t asked for.
As Mr. Simpkins' income was $4,000
he had to figure out the amounts pay.
able on each of the successive smaller
classes of incomes In order to arrive
at the total due from himself He
passed over the first class who must
pay taxes, that Is, single men making
over 1000. His calculation for mar
ried men then showed up as follows.
First, they pay 2 per cent. (under
the 1915 law on all income over
$4,000, deducting 5000 for each Of their
children under eighteen years. In Mr.,
Simpkins case this was $2l2 which he
put down in the payable" column.
He saw next that, under the 1917
law, married men pay an additional 2
per cent. on all over $2000-with the
same allowance for children. This
added 1852 to his payable" column
He then observed that for every
$4,000 jump in his income over $4,000
he had to pay Surtax the percentage
growing larger with each jump. This
was $3.50 more added to his burden.
And on top Of all this came an "Ex-
cess Profits" tax Of per cent. on all
Occupation" income over $4,000, max.
ing $720 more.
The total, then, he must pay was four.
teen hundred and thirty-four dollars,
"Whew!" exclaimed Mr. Slmpklns
angrlly. "There's young Henry VII.
kins, who married Jake Johnson's girl,
he makes $4,000 and he doesn't pay
cent. Of taxes. | guess this Is his war
as well rs mine"
Thinking Of young Henry wilkins,
he remembered'that Mrs. wilkins went
every afternoon to make bondages for
the Red Cross and that Henry, who
was lawyer, was aiding the Local
Draft Board with Its qucstIonnalres.
"Well," he admitted to himself,
that makes a difference"
He thought next Of Judge Wlllough.
by, whose income was about $4,000.
"He only pays 500" commented Mr..
Simpkns, not quite so angrlly this
llme and then thought struck him
and he sat up rlgldly In his chair,
Judge Willoughby's son had been
drowned on the Tuscanlu when Il was
summarized with the loss Of two hun.
dred soldiers.
"Judge Willoughby gave his son to
America muttered Mr., Slmpklns,
He leaned forward suddenly and put
his face In his hands,
For long time Mr., Slmpklns sat
very still IN that position. There was
no sound In the library except the
ticking Of the tall clock and IN occa.
slonal tril Of laughter from the chill.
dren skylarklng upstairs, The squire
Of light on the carpet gradually with.
drew itself through the window, and
Arst twilight and then darkness settled
In about the quiet, white haired, some.
times irnscible old man.
Mr., simptins was thinking things
which he would never ofterward speak
Of, he was thinking things that were
too sacred ever TO be put into words,
But some inkllng Of his thoughts may
be found In his rejolnder to Mrs,
Simpkina when thnt plneld lAdy CANA