davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1918-04-12
R.M.PARR9fF
CLOVER, S. c.

YES, TO BE SURE, our stock of
Spring Oxfords is very complete. We
believe we can please the most partic- :
ular folks as to quality and style, and
we are sure thai we can satisfy you
As to the Price. Give US trial Here
you'll find:
LADIES' OXFORDS.
Kid Oxfords, high and low heels
Priced 1T ...... S2.S5 TO $3.50
English Style Walking OxfOrds, Wei,
Tans and Black. ..... $3.50 to $3.50
Kid Pumps and Dull kid-beautiful
footwear-Priced 80. S2.75 to $3.50
MEMS OXFORDS.
English OxfOrtls--Vici Kid and Gun
Metal, Tans and Black-Priced at
...... $3.50 to 5000
TENNIS SHOES
For Men, Women and children-all
sizes.
Buy Your Footwear at Clorers Lead
ing Dry Goods Store.
o. M. PARRoTT.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1918-04-12

Fully Explained.-A tramp knock
.d at n farmers door and called for
something to eat.
Are you Christian" asked 'h'
good hearted countryman.
Cant you tell?" answered the man
Look at the holes worn In the Knees
OF my pants. What do they prove;
The farmers wife promptly brought
out the food. and the tramp turned 'o
20.
We'll. we'll" exclaimed the farm
or. What made those holes IN th'
back of your pants"
Back sliding" replied the tramp
as ne hurried away.-Christian Her
aid.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1918-04-12

corrected.--A teacher instructinr
her class in grammar wrote two SEN
tcrces ON the blackboard. The sen
tences were: THE hen has got three
legs" and who done it," She said to
Tommy who was not very bright
pupil:
Go to the blackboard and correct
those two sentences"
D-rcyrv ri-rrlr annr11shoa. Joe
.un.IJ --oIo~Iy s-pp.SS>--S~ ,.'-
board, thinking hard. Then he TOOK
the chalk and wrote:
The hen never done it. Nature
done it."-Good Jests.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1918-04-12
He'd Fix 'Em.-An attorney

He'd Fix 'Em.-An attorney WIG
was a daily passenger on remote
western railroad had row with inc
conductor one morning. When the row
was over the passenger turned 10
friend md i'm an audible tone remark
ed:
We'll. this road will never sec
n cent of my money after today.
The conductor who was collecting
tickets across the aisle glanced or"r
and snarled:
"Whatm you do? Walk
"Oh, no." replied the attorney pleas
antly. I'm stop buying tickets ana
nav nv fare TO you."-Exchange.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1918-04-12
J. s. HARTNESs, Cashier.
NOTICE

Is hereby given that a meeting Of
the stockholders Of the Kirkpatrick.
Belk Company. a South Carolina cor
poration with It's principal place Of
business at York, 8. c.. will be held
in the Office Of the company on TUES
DAY, APRIL 80, 1918. at 4 o'clock T..
~, to consider a resolution to in
crease the capital stock of said cor
poration.
BY order OF the Directors.
kRKPATRICK-B -BELK co.
April 5. IL. 19. 26'
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1918-04-12

Few and Far Between.-"Only took
two orders in this town. Gosh. I've
got to speed up this week" comment
ed the wiry traveller.
IL got my last order just three years
ago today" remarked the fat sales
man reminiscently. six months ago
nv salary was raised and l expect to
get another order in about six weeks
What do you happen to he hand
ling. anyway"
Suspension bridges. ."-EXchange.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1918-04-12

Mr.. Thomas Probably Was.-A lit
tie girl whose father was CONNER
cial traveller, sat on porch hoidihg
u kitten, and. creeping up close her
mother heard this:
Kitty" said the young miss, i
know YOU an know your mamma
an know all your little brothers an
sisters, but l amt ever seen your
papa"-then after a brief pause
spec he must be u travelling man.
The keystone Traveller.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1918-04-12

ia A Greenwich man tells Of q Con-
necticut farmer who. after having
driven lot Of hogs to Greenwich
sold them for a precisely what had
been offered him before he left home
You haven't made much bringins
your hogs here" remarked the man.
Well. no." replied the agriculturist'
dejectedly. II ain't made no money
but then. you KNOW" his face bright
ening. l had the company OF the
hogs on the way over."-Life.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1918-04-12

Because Of the prevailing scarcity Of
men and the expectation that the next
draft will still further reduce the sup
ply, the board Of education Of Port
land, Ore. has established a training
school for young women to be restau-
rant cooks and mattresses to take the
place Of the men workers.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1918-04-12

Experiment Of Far Reaching I'm
portanee.-Concretes ship. "The Faith" i"
has been launched upon the Pacific
coast. She measures 1900 tons. She
took the water six weeks after the
first concrete was poured into the
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1918-04-12
Followed Instructions

keen the visitors from coming up.
said the office boy. dejcctedly. TO th'
president. when ] say you're ON
they simply say they must see YOU.
Well" said the president, Just tei
them that's what they all say"
That afternoon there called at tho
office a young lady. The boy assured
her il was impossible 10 see the presi-
dent.
"But | am his wife," said the iadE.
"Oh, that's what they all say, said
the boy.-Selling Facts.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1918-04-12

Pulpit camouHase.-"Mabel." q"er-
led the caller OF the minister's little
daughter. does your father ever
preach the same sermon twice.?
Yes. think he does" replied
Mabel, but he talks loud and soft IN
different phrases each time SO II
doesn't sound the same to outsiders
indianapolis Star.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1918-04-12
The Nasal sy.tem.-when mothe

The Nasal System.-When mother
WAS arranging the pantry shelves
Marjory handed her the spice boxes
mentioning each spice by name. Pre-
sently, she said: Mamma, l can
read"
Can you. dear?
Yes. mamma" said MarJory: pu'
I don't read like you-1 read d!
smell."-Boston Transcript.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1918-04-12

eriuht Boston Pupil.-What Is the
meaning OF alter ego'?" asked the
teacher Of the beginners class in
Latin. 1T means the other L." re-
sponded a pupil.
give me sentence containing the
phrase"
He winked his alter ego. .-bos-
ton Transcript
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1918-04-12

Even So.-"Our country's best re-
sources are its women" shouted the
suffrage orator.
Came a voice from the gallery:
Our resources should be husband
ed."-Iadies' Home Journal.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1918-04-12

Not Always.-"Mother." asked Tom
my, do fairy tales always begin with
Once Upon a Timer"
NO. dear. not always: they some
times begin with My love. have
been detained at the Office again to-
night Judge.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1918-04-12

- The Enquirer sOlicits orders for
all kinds Of High Grade Commercial
Stationefy-Ietter Heads, Bill Heads,
Statements. Envelopes, Etc.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1918-04-12

Some Snap Also.-"They say the
banjo player here gets ten dollars q
night"
yeah. Pretty easy picking. -
Record.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1918-04-12
JAMES BROS.
All the Year Livestock Dealers
DID YOU KNOW

That the owner OF an Automobile is
just as liable for damages inflicted by
his car. either to life or property, as
Is a railroad. n cotton mill or any
other corporation? Whether you are
aware of the fact or not. you may
have II rude awakening some OF these
days after you have accidentally
killed or MANNED somebody or dam
aged anothcr's car or other property.
and then II will be too late. The only
safe plan is Ia carry liability insur-
ance. Infinitely more money is paid
out annually by companies writing
Automobile Liability Insurance than
by those writing Automobile Fire In
surance. Losing your car by fire.
even though II Is not insured would
not break YOU up. but being called on
TO pay $1,000 TO $4,000 damages
might. 1t would certainly Jar most of
us some. 1t will not cost you any
thing 10 look into the matter. and
might save you from bankruptcy.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1918-04-12

THE MULE YOU WANT
Will be found ut Our Stables. We
have Mules that will satisfy the most
| cxacting demands of the buyer-SiZc.
Quality and almost in color. What
ever may bc your needs I'm livestock. II
IN TO your interest to see us for your
needs. More Mules received this week
ana others are yet To arrive. Com" Ia
see our Mules.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1918-04-12
"See 'Gets-It' Peel
Off This Corn. "
Leaves the Toe aS smooth as the Palm
Of Your Hand.

The corn never grew that "Gets-!t
will not get. II never irritates the
flesh, never makes your toe sore. just
two drops of "Gets-lt'' and presto
the corn pain vanishess shortly You
can peel the corn right of with your
The Brattleboro daily reformer. (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1913-1955, 1918-12-24
COST OF STATE INSTITUTIONS.

The budget committee in making its
recommendations for state appropria-
tons for the coming biennial term
gave the increased cost of living at
the state institutions as one of the
causes for increasing the appropria-
tions for their support. The increases
recommended are shown in the follow
ing statement of current appropriations
and appropriations recommended by
the committee for the next biennial
term:
Brattleboro Retreat, increased $4,000
n year from the current appropriation
of sol 900 to $4,000; state hospital
for insane, increased $4,000, or from
$4,000 to 5000, 900; state industrial
school, increased $4,000 or from $780,
600 to $4,000; state soldiers home, in
creased $4,000 or from $4,000 to $24,-
600; state prison, increased $4,000 or
The Brattleboro daily reformer. (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1913-1955, 1918-12-24
TUESDAY, DECEMBER 81. 1918.
LOOKS EXPENSIVE.

II We read the statement of state ex-
rcnses, issued by the state audior, cor
rcctly, the last revision of the laws OF
Vermont cost the tidy sum of $50, $50.
81. The laws of the state are revised
once in ten years and this last revision
changed them from "'the Public Stat
utes of Vermont to 1.-THE General
Laws of Vermont. - The items which
90 to make up this sum of $J3, 5s3.61,
taken from the comparative state
mcnt of expenses are as follows
Commission to Revise Public Stat
utes" for the year 1914, $2,9G5.5l; for
1918, $77313.
Commissioner to Revise p s." for
the year 1915, $2O410; for 1916, $lO,-
o39.29; for 1917, $15,s3OO3.
Editors Public Statutes and Gen.
cral Laws for the year 1917, $2,0s7.-
%; for 1918, s21,6s3.56.
The total of these amounts is S53,-
5S3.6l. Divide this amount by the to-
tai number of days in these five years
1s25, and you get $29.36 plus per day
Sundays and all. Whether or not this
total includes the cost of printing and
binding the new edition of the General
Laws we do not know. But it looks as
though il was rather expensive iof
for the state.
II would be interesting to know how
much Of this large sum went TO the
man who had the most to do in this
work, how much for expenses and how
much for printing etc. To look at tn,
look and then at these figures make.
it appear as though Hog Island
job had been put up on the taxpayers o.
the state. While there probably would
not be anything criminal uncovered i
might be well for the incoming legis
lature TO appoint n committee and in
vcstigatc the accounts of this honorar,
member of "The Statehouse Gang"
The Brattleboro daily reformer. (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1913-1955, 1918-12-24
Little Benny's
Note Book
Proofs
By LEE PAPE


Iou are libel to find froot in pie, pud
ding or froot salad, but never in stew or
gravey unless its by axsident, proving
that froot is more OF dzzert than wat
it is of a vegetable
Froots are like people in ways, ferst
because they all have skin erround them
to perteck their insides and make them
look better, and 2nd because they are all
sorts OF diffrent shapes The skin is also
used In serten froots to attach one end
Of the stem on to. The politest way to
eat froot is to take the skin off ferst, ony
most people ony do it wen there's com
pinny, exsept bannannas. Even the most
ignorant people don't eat bananas with
the peels on, ferst because bannannas are
mulch tenderer by. themselves and 2nd
because they are sutch plezzant froots tc
peel. Most froots grow loose, but bannan
mas grow by the du2zen
The froot with the most joose in it i
the orindge. If you open a orindge toe
suddln 1t is libel to squert joose in your
eye and serprize you. If you took the
skin and the joose away frum orindg,
IT would be the most unimportant lookinG
| froot there is.
The name diffrents between crap.
and apple is that if you ate applet
you would start to feel satisfied.
The Brattleboro daily reformer. (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1913-1955, 1918-12-24
AREAL HAIR SAVER
Found at Last. Partisan Sage Shows
Results in Three Days.

If you are rapidly losing your hair
and fear badness, w. +. Root wants
you to try Partisan sage at their risk
1t will quickly stop the excessive loss
of hair and make your hair and scalp
look and feel 100 per cent better, or
money refunded.
Hundreds of men and Women have
written telling of the wonderful re-
suits obtained by using Partisan sage.
People who were getting bald say they
now glory in their beautiful hair.
Others who have had dandruff for
years and the head itched like mad
say they had clean, healthy scalp
after just a few applications of this
splendid home treatment.
No matter whether bothered with
falling hair, gray hair, stringy, dull,
brittle, oily hair, dandruff of itching
scalp, try Partisan sage today on this
money back offer. A large bottle is
inexpensive at drug stores everywhere,
and if your hair is worth saving Paris
ian sage is surely worth trying-Adv.
The Brattleboro daily reformer. (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1913-1955, 1918-12-24

from $50 1000 to $4,000; house of cor
rection, increased $1,000 or from $33,-
600 to $4,000; school for feeble-mihd
ed, decreased $4,000 or from $4,000
to $4,000.
With the material increase in the
amount of food produced by these in
stitutions it would seem as though lib
eral provision has been made for the
increased cost of necessities at these
institutions.
The Brattleboro daily reformer. (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1913-1955, 1918-12-24

me about from house to house and
rang the bell and left me on the porch
while the people came to the door.
| was there as visitor, saying how
do you do Well, some of those folks
banged the door when they saw me.
There is nothing wrong about me, but
you know there are some people who
are just cross and mean by nature and
they can't enter into the fun of the
autumn season and the pumpkin Jack
o. Lantern visitors. But thank good
ness. most people aren't like that
still, don't know just how I'm going
TO be liked"
The Brattleboro daily reformer. (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1913-1955, 1918-12-24

Occasionally cousin Emma of Mis-
souri, sends US copy of her home pa
per the Aurora Sentinel The following
account of an Aurora society event
would seem TO be the last word in lun-
cheons.
A grand luncheon was given by Tom
Black Sunday, the 'piece de resist
ancc' being huge and corpulent pos
sum. The guests of honor were Mrs.
Hardy Run, Mrs. Mack Patton, and
their children, and Misses Sophie
Brush and Miss Catalina Dough. 1t
was q highly ENJOYABLE event.
The Brattleboro daily reformer. (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1913-1955, 1918-12-24
Showed the Right Spirit.

This story of Lieutenant Colonel
Griffith is told by Dan Polling, a Y. NJ.
c. A. secretary recently returned from
France, who describes the colonel as
a typical soldier, ga military man from
his heels up.
A wounded Bavarian lieutenant was
being carried to the American lines
when the Germans fired on the little
party. The stretcher was dropped and
the men ran for cover. When they
reached headquarters and reported to
Lieutenant Colonel Griffith he inquired:
:" Did the carriers stay with the prise
ner2''
NO was the reply Gle a Hun
If Germany wants to kill her own men
she has the privilege of doing so, but
she shouldn't be allowed to muss us up
while doing it."
The Colonel smiled, then said quietly
3" Yes, he is Hun; we are Americans
Go back and get him.
The Brattleboro daily reformer. (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1913-1955, 1918-12-24
"A Horrid Old
Fly"

time, please buzzed the fly.
II beg your pardon" said the Jack
O Lantern.
I'll answer the first one first and
the second one second if you wish"
said the fly, though If you would
rather I will answer the second one
first and the first one second"
mo, don't do that" said the Jack
o Lantern, "for I haven't had any
schooling and I don't know great
deal. 1t would doubtless confuse me
and mix me up. if you did that. So
please answer the first question first
| and the second question second"
ITO tell you the TRUTH" said the
| fly, "Pye never been to school myself.
They don't have any schools for flies.
i They don't care TO educate US ana
teach US spelling. And SO, as l know
T.! so little and as my memory is so short.
I've forgotten which question you
asked first and which you asked sec
ond. And to tell you the honest truth
I've forgotten just what your Ques-
| lions were"
The Jack O. Lantern grinned and
it's funny teeth looked still funnier.
"My first question was that l said
How"
Howl" repeated the fly. "How
WHAT"
No, not how what-just hOw-all
by ITSELF" said the Jack o Lantern.
What went with how-strawberry
sauce or sugar or cake?" asked the
fly.
Nothing went with it like that"
laughed Jack o. Lantern. "YeS, I
really believe there are no schools for
flies. In fa,t, l think l know more
than you do. l asked you how you
were always received. You said you
always knew how you were going to
be received, you know"
"Oh. yes, yes" said the fly. waving
one of its wings. nov | seem to I'M
derstand and remember. l said that
l always knew how | was going to
be received-and I do OF course
don't know just how they'll go about
ii, whether they will use fly paper.
fly hitters. fly poisons or what. But
they won't give me 4 rousing welcome.
No, people don't like flies. They say
we carry dirt and germs and aren't
, nice at all It's perfectly true, We
de-
so you admit it." the Jack o. Lam
tern replied. well now, please an
Swer my second question. Aren't you
glad you know how you are going to
be received rather than not to know
it at all? You're sure you aren't well
come. But you know it beforehand.
!, You're all prepared"
"Oh, don't mind" said the fly. 81
:, fly about and care little for anyone or
anything Except food. and sweet
things especially. I'm not very fussy
about what folks think or what they
i; do If l fly about and live it's all
right and if l don't it doesn't bother
:, me.
"The sun came out so nicely today
that thought it was warm enough for
me. If anyone sees ME l will hear
this: oh, there is horrid fly But
it won't matter TO me-not in the
!. least"
d We'll" said the Jack o. Lantern
|. I'm different. AS you may know,
The Brattleboro daily reformer. (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1913-1955, 1918-12-24
Shortening Vermont Style.

(By Daniel /. Cady)
When Oleomargarine was small
And Crisco wasn't born at all,
While yet the house Of Cotton Seed
Was Identified with chicken feed.
Before a single packers name
Was hung within the Hall Of Fame.
We cooked with shortening-and III
say
We got it in the good old way.
We killed pig. or two, or more,
As Christian folks had done before
And when the pork was all put down,
Or 81 lent to neighbors round the
town.
To be repaid us, fitch for fitch,
When they themselves got freshmeat
rich
We tided up the house and yard
And turned to trying out the lard.
We aimed TO do it Tuesday, say,
When Mondays wash was out the
way;
And first we made kind of dope
With ashes, vinegar, and soap,
And secured the big brass kettle up
~ SHINY as loving cup;
Oh. if / owned that kettle now
Twould buy horse and half q cow.
The kitchen arch was nextly lit
With Mr.. Kettle top of il.
All filled with that delightful leaf
That s only tallow-stock in beef;
Then next we moved the woodpile box.
| And filled the space with Jars and
crooks,
And found middlings bag twas new
| To strain the precious product throuoh
| We kept the squeezerS "overhead"
In what was called the woodhouse shed
The weather hinges, soft and black,
| Would sometimes need an extra tack,
And then we sealt 'em till the steam
Was thick around as city cream,
And dried 'em on my tippet nail
! Beyond the reach of Towser's tail.
Our old big skinner then took hold
And bagged them scraps of russell gold
We dreened the bag as long as 'twoule
And then we squo2e it mighty good
And when we give the final squeeze
We held the handles 'twixt our knees
That bag, By Gracious! had to stant
The punch the family force coulc
land.
And say; them scraps was fine to eat
a pinch of salt brought out the sweet
And when that lard was cool and hard
Such lard: so white; OH My; such lard
The bosom friend of chicken pie.
/ The apple of doughnut S eye
Bring on most any Hoover card
But dose my dough with homemade
lard.
The Brattleboro daily reformer. (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1913-1955, 1918-12-24
The Reformer is on sale every evening BY

The Reformer Is on sale every evening by
the following news dealers;
Brattleboro, Brattleboro News Co.. C w.
cleveland. s. L. Purinton (Esteyville), Brooks
House Pharmacy, Aliens Depot Newsstand,
George J. Bower, 2 Riverview Street (Fort
Drummer district.
West Brattleboro, J. L. Stockwell.
East Dummerston, NJ. E. Brown.
Putney, M. G. Williams.
Newfane, N. NJ Batchelder.
Townshend, c. w. Cutler.
West Townshend, c. II. Grout.
Jamaica, r. ]. Daggett.
South Londonderry, F. H. Tyler.
South Vernon. f. B. Buffum.
Mortified, Mass, Thompson Bros.
West Chesterfield, N. 4, Mrs. w. Streeter.
Hinsdale, ". h, w. II. Lyman.
Greenfield, Mass, Greenfield News Co.
The Brattleboro daily reformer. (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1913-1955, 1918-12-24
Sure Relief For
All RheumaticS
If So Crippled You Can't Use Arms
or Legs, Rheuma win Help You.

Ii you want relief in two days. swift.
certain. gratifying relief. take small dose
of Rheuma once day
Ii you want to dissolve every particle Of
uric acid poison in your body and drive
it out through the natural channels so
that you will be forever free from rheu-
matism, get a bottle of Rheuma from
Wilfred F. Root or any druggist at once
1t must give the joyful relief expected or
money refunded
Rheumatism is powerful disease
strongly entrenched in joints and mus
cles In order to conquer it a powerful
enemy must be sent against it. Rheuma
IS the enemy of Rheumatism-an enemy
that cenquers is in nearly every instance
Judge John Barhorst of Fort Loramie,
crutches; today he is well. 1t should do
as much for you; it seldom fails.-Ady.
The Brattleboro daily reformer. (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1913-1955, 1918-12-24
TO THE SUBSCRIBERS.

II is the aim OF the management TO secure
efficient service in the delivery of the paper
each night, and il solicts the cooperation Of
be given Of each failure to receive the paper
on the morning following the omission, in
person, by telephone or postal card, thus en-
abling the cause Of the error TO be promptly
and accurately discovered and the proper rem
edy Immediately applied. II is only by this
method that the publisher can secure the de-
sired service.
The Brattleboro daily reformer. (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1913-1955, 1918-12-24

Rev. c. F. Hill Crathern. pastor of
the Old First church in Old Benning
ton, has received telegram instruct
ing him to report in New York on the
9th prepared to sail for France. Mr..
Crathern has had his name on the vol
untary overseas service list for Y. NJ
O. A. workers for a number of months
waiting for a call to Mesopotamia. Re
Gently he was notified of his transfer
from the Mesopotamia field to France.