The Washington herald., 1918-04-12
Hugh Was Slick.

Hugh Was Slick.
The first national bank Is not as
safe as We used to think 1t was.
II you don't believe task Belle
Cammyer.
Belle had been in the habit of keep
ing her bankroll in her stocking.
She and Hugh Miller have been
keeping company for some time.
Before we go on with this yarn
remember. please, that We are not ac-
cusing Belle Of doing anything un-
ladyike.
But-in some mysterious way Hugh
got hold of this money.
Belle didn't give it to him-and It
was surely in her stocking when she
last saw K-she is absolutely sure of
that
The pair were sitting in the front
room with dImmed lights Monday
evening, chewing the rag as they al
ways did.
An hour after Hugh left. Belle went
to bed.
And as she shed her stockings she
noticed that her roll was gone.
Hugh was nabbed the next morn
ing. He had $4.H on him.
He swore 1t was lying on the floor
OuI DCAAG lhltTC was Only one
hole in her stocking-the one she
puts her foot through to put It on.
SO fine for him.
Three Stews.
IT only drank a half pint Of whis-
key, Judge" said Jim Hunt. "and I
am positive that it didn't make me
drunk. II might have made me crazy.
though
That's enough to make any man
drunk" replied the court. Pay a
fine Of SO and drink water hereafter
instead
1t wasn't wet enough in the coun-
try for Moses Barron. He came to
town. wet on the outside and proceed
ed to get wet on the inside.
Nah foot slipped. Jedge," explain
ed Moses. Instead of de booze goir'
to nah stummick hit went to NAH
hald."
Ten dollar fine for you too" said
the court
Rather than have anyone mistake
Ed Long. a sailor. for a member of
the Shipping Board, Policeman Davis
had to arrest Ed and lock him up.
Ed was picked, awfully picked and
was spending his money like they do
on Hog Island. He was also cussing
in front of the women.
When Davis got him to the box, Ed
insisted that the cop take a seat on
! the wet sidewalk. Just imagine a COP
| running his pants that way.
Pay a fine Of S15," the court told
Eddie.
Some Girls Are Particular.
"Jedge. Yonner. All met dis yere
! gal, Essie Potts, on Sebenth street.
All says, 'Essie, how bout a bowl
of yokamee wild me?
Den she hoIlers LAX somebuddy
was killin' her. All only had holt
of her hand whilst All was talkin'
to her"
From the looks Of her shirt
7 waist" said the court to Fred
Benton. 'it looks like there was a
struggle. What did you hit her for?"
she hit hersefH, Jedge," explain
ed Fred. En- All thinks dat dat
is her hard luck-not mine"
We don't mean to insinuate that
Essie would refuse to eat yokamee,
oh. no-the- girl is particular with
whom she eats.
She never did like Fred's COM
pany, anyway. she said, and she
was scared to turst herself in
restaurant with him.
When she refused him, he grabbed
her and wanted to pull her into the
place anyhow.
She struggled. They both strug-
sled. And then Fred let Essie have
the palm Of his hand across her
mouth because she holIered.
Twenty dollars fine for him.
Keep Out Of the Kitchen, Henry.
ledge. ef NAH husband would jes'
stay outen de kitchen en- let me run
| things dere, We wouldn't hab no
trouble, at all at all"
1t doesn't make any difference even
IL Henry Mallory was once a chef
in an Atlantic City hotel-his wife