The Washington herald., 1918-08-09
To Be Divorced or Not to Be-
By DOROTHY DIX
THE WORLDS HIGHEST PAID WOMAN WRITER

A family is in moderate circum-
stances. The man makes enough money
not only to support 1t In comfort, but
to give ii many luxuries. The chill
dren are well dressed; they are being
well educated and given a fair chance
in life. The wife Is a middle-aged
woman. thrifty. industrious and a
good housekeeper. but she has been
trained to no gainful occupation. and
has never earned a dollar outside of
the home. Suddenly the wife dis
covers that her husband Is unfaithfu,
to her, and that he is philandering
around with other women.
What shall the wife do? Shall she
forgive" her husband. as the cant
phrase goes or shall she divorce him?
him7
This Is a problem that many women
ask me to help them solve. To them
! would say this:
We are SO accustomed to looking al
divorce from the moral standpoint
tht we often forget that it has a
practical side as well. Marriage may
or may not be a religious sacrament,
but It Ii certainly a meal ticket to
the average wife. A man may break
the vows that he swears at the altar
10 lONc lllC "OAhoh hc i1
marrying. but the law holds him
to his oath to cherish her, in so far
as supporting her Is concerned. as
long as she remains his legal wife.
1t is to this aspect n the divorce
question that I would like to direct
the attention of the hurt and outraged
women who are trying to decide what
they shall do with their unfaithful
husbands
Personally, have no prejudice
against divorce. In many cases di-
vorce is not only a right, but a
righteous thing. In many other cases
divorce is a privilege and a luxury
1t is no woman's duty to live with q
husband under conditions that de-
grade her, or in an association that
brings out all that Is worst in her
nature, nor is any woman called upon
to be a faithful. patient wife to +
man who fouts her. and insults her
by his infidelities.
Marriage is a contract. and when
man defaults on his part OF the
bargain, 1t automatically releases the
woman from all moral obligations to
fulfill her end of the trade. Un-
doubtedly, a woman has a right to
separate herself from a flirtatious hus-
band, but unfortunately. rights very
often are cold and barren things, and
before a woman in this unhappy sit
uation takes the fatal step, she does
we'll to consider her case from the
International and practical side. as well
as from the side of her wounded pride
and affections.
So shall she save herself from add
ing a lost home. lost comforts, and
a lost social position, to a lost hus-
band, for 1t Is not to be denied that
many a woman who gets her divorce
finds her last estate worse than her
first, and that she has merely Jumped
from the frying pan into the fire.
To begin with, divorce Is really q
| luxury for the rich. If a woman has
an independent fortune she can afford
to indulge herself in 1t IL her husband
does not properly toe the matrimonial
dead line. Also, II man has prop
erty upon which the law can lay its
clutching hands, his wife may divorce
him IL he does not walk the straight
and parrow path, and he can be made
to properly support her and hei
children.
But It Is easier for a camel to GO
through the eye of a needle than II is
for the divorced wife to collect ALI
mony from a man Of small means
\ The orders Of court to- such mer
to pay their wives a certain weekly
| or monthly stipend are just 30 many
scraps Of paper. There are thou
sand ways in which the ex-husbant
can conceal his real earnings and
keep from handing over the money
he wants for his own pleasures to q
woman that he only thinks of will
bitterness and hate.
The divorced wife, no matter how
Just her grievance against her hus
band. finds herself without support
but SO long as she remains the man'i
wife he is compelled to pay her, bills
and he does this generally willingly
not only as a sort Of sop to his con.
science, but because it ministers to Q
mans vanity to have his family live
in good style and present a goot
appearance.
| To a woman whose heart IL tori
with jealousy over her husband,
attentions to another woman, II
seems q sordid argument to say
| overlook his offenses against tht
| highest and holiest things in If,
because he can give you physica.
comforts, but n-such cases It IL q
condition and not a theory that tn,
woman faces. She simply has hel
choice between half a loaf or nj
bread at all
Her divorce win not make he,
broken heart whole again. It Will