The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1918-01-24
Cuffs and push back the Forelock and

Cuffs and push back the Forelock and
try to be Human
No use. He vas strictly Ritz-Carl.
ton from the Pumps to the Topper,
but the word Boob" was stenciled
right across the glossy Front.
When they had conquered all the
Earthquakes In the Tenderloin they
moved on to Europe, where they were
just as welcome as Influenza.
1t was great to sit in the Savoy
at the Supper Hour, surrounded by
the best known people mentioned in
the Court Circulars.
1t was indeed a privilege for Elan
and Claudine to be among the British
Cousins, even if the British Cousins
did not seem to place Elan and
Claudine.
Looking in any direction they could
see naught but frosty and forbidding
Shoulder-Blades.
After partaking of their Sole and
Grouse and winning pleasant Good
Night" from the Chevalier in the
Check-Room, they would escape to
their Apartments and talk to the Dog
In Paris they did better,
They learned that by going out on
the Boulevard and whistling, they
could summon a whole Regiment of
high-born and patrician Down-and-
Cutters.
Most of the Titles were slightly
worm-eaten and spotted with Fungi,
but nevertheless Genuine
It was Nuts for Claudine to as
semble all the Noblemen to be picked
up around the Lobby and gave them
a free run and jump at the Carte
du Jour.
Her Dinners soon became the talk
of the Chambermaids employed in the
Hotel.
Anyone willing to cut loose on
Caviar and stuff raised under Glass
will never dine alone in gay Paree.
Whenever Elan made noise like
1000 Frongs, he found a lot of we'll
bred Connoisseurs at his Elbow, all
ready to have something unusual
drought up from Ile Cellar.
The securing of an invitation to one
of Claudine's formal Dinners was al
most as difficult as getting into Luna
Park.
However, the list of guests sounded
Real when sent hack to America and
printed for the entertainment of per
sons living in Boarding Houses
Claudine became slightly puffed.
When she found herself between a
couple of perfumed Lads wearing
Medals, she would give Friend Hus-
band the Office to move to one side
and curl up in the Grass and not ruin
the Ensemble by boring in.
Elan was usually at the foot of the
Table behind a mass of Orchids Once
in a while he would try to crowd into
the conversation just to let them know
that old Ready Money was still pres
ent, but every time he came up Dearie
would do her blamedest to Bean him
and put him out of the Game
Claudine could make a stab at the
new Picture in the Salon and even run
nimbly around the edge of the Futur-
list vogue
Elan was ready to discuss Steam
ship Lines or Railway Accommoda-
tons, but VIXEN he was put against
the TalI-Brows he began to burn
low and smell of the Wick
Often, when surfeited with Truffies,
he would wonder what had become of
the Green Corn, the K and K, the
regular Chicken with Giblets, the
Pie, the smoking Oyster
Stew, and the Smearcase with Chives,
such as Gusta used to send in. These
reminders of lowly Past were very
distasteful
Once he talked in his Sleep about
Goldfish Balls, and next morning she !
lit on him something scandalous.
After the Partisan triumphs it
seemed safe bet to return home and
make new effort to mingle with
the Face-Cards.