davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1918-05-22
HARLEM OIL CAPSULES
IF YOUR BACK ACHES

Don't ignore the little pains and
aches" especially backaches. They
may be little now but there is no tell
ing how soon dangerous or fatal dis
ease of which they are the forerun-
ners may show itself. Go after the
cause of that backache at once, or you
may find yourself liz the grip of an in
durable disease.
Do not delay a minute. Go to your
druggist and insist on his supplying
you with a box Of GOLD MEDAL
HARLEM Oil Capsules. In "a hours
you will feel renewed health and vigor.
After you have cured yourself. con-
tinue to take one or two Capsules
each day so as to keep in first-class
condition. and ward off the danger of
future attacks. Money refunded If
they do not help you. Ask for the
original imported GOLD MEDAL
brand, and thus be sure of getting the
genuine.-Adv.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1918-05-22
HAD HEARD THAT QUESTION
Was Addressing the Highest Of
fetal Of the State.

One of our city's woman's clubs has
a booth In the Columbia club, where a
group of the clubwomen have been
selling Liberty bonds all week. Fri.
day one Of these women approached a
man who was passing the booth, and
put her usual question to him:
do you want to buy any more Lib
erty bonds?"
NO" answered the man declslvely.
To the woman's ear there was pro-
nOunced sharpness in his reply.
"Ah," she said. taking step near
er, "are you aware that the govern
ment Is anxious TO know the reason
back Of anyone's decided refusal to
buy Liberty bondsT'
The man threw his head back and
laughed long and heartily. A group
of men standing near, who had wit
messed the incident. Joined In the
laughter.
That's good one on you, COVER
nor" exclaimed one of the group who
happened to know that the man adj
dressed had bought many Liberty
bonds.
ut is, indeed" the man responded.
"and I want to say right now that this
spirit Of alertness is just what we
need everywhere, and I'm mighty glad
to have come In contact with IT," and
Governor Goodrich bowed himself
News.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1918-05-22
SCORED HEAVILY ON STACKER
Probably Dude Will Think Twice Be-
fore He Again Attempts to Have
Fun With a Kiltie.

The following was overheard on
street car one very cold day in winter
In q Canadian city. At a corner the
car was boarded by husky soldier in
the picturesque Highland uniform
the kits Of which leave the knees bare.
On the car was young dude still in
multi, seated with his best girl. The
girl cast admiring glanees at the at
tractively uniformed "Kiltie" much to
the displeasure of her Stacker escort
So he endeavored to make fun of the
uniform by remarking, 81 think that
outfit is most ridiculous. That fellows
knees look as If they were frozen"
The Kiltie overhearing the comment
glanced contemptuously at the dudes
civilian clothes, then scornfully re-
piled:
well. young fellc~. it is sure
thing my knees aren't as cold as your
feet"
The Stacker got Off at the next stop.
Canadian.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1918-05-22
ON GUARD

At this time of the year people feel
weak, tired, listless. their blood is thin,
they have lived indoors and perhaps
expended all their mental and bodily
energy and they want to know how to
renew their energy and stamina, over
come headaches and backaches, have
clear eyes, smooth, rudy skin, and
feel the exhilaration Of real good health
tingling thru their body. Good, pure,
rich, red blood is the best insurance
against ills of all kinds. Almost all
diseases come from impure and lmpov-
erished blood. II is to be noticed in the
pale or pimply face, the tired haggard
appearance or the listless manner.
Drink hot water a half hour before
meals, and for vege able tonic there's
nothing better than DR.. Pierce's Golden
Medical Discovery, the old-fashioned
herbal remedy, which has had such a
fine reputation for fifty years. 1t con-
tains no alcohol or h2rcctics. Il is
made from Golden Seal root, Blood
root, Oregon grape root. Queens root,
Black Cherry bark, extracted with gly-
cerine ana made into tablets and liquid.
Tablets sixty cents, at most drug stores.
In order to insure pure blood and to
build up the system try this tonic
known as DR.. Pierce's Golden Medical
Discovery. Get it now!
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1918-05-22

Do you feel tired and "worn-out?"
Are you nervous and irritable? Don't
sleep well at night? Have a dragged
out" unrested feeling when you get
up in the morning? Dizzy spells? Bill
ious? Bad taste In the mouth, back
ache, pain or soreness in the loins,
and abdomen? Severe distress when
urinating, bloody, cloudy urine or sed-
iment? All these indicate gravel or
stone in the bladder, or that the poi
sOnous microbes, which are always in
your system, have attacked your kid
neyS.
You should use GOLD MEDAL
Haarlem Oil Capsules Immediately.
The oil soaks gently into the walls
and lining of the kidneys, and the lit
tie poisonous animal germs, which are
causing the Inflammation, are imme-
diately attacked and chased out of
your system without inconvenience or
pain.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1918-05-22
Wouldn't Need To.

Pat walked into the post office After
getting into the telephone box he
called a wrong number. AS there was
no such number the switch attendant
did not answer him. Pat shouted again.
but received no answer.
The lady Of the post office opened
the door and told him TO shout a little
louder. which he did, but still no an
swer.
Again she said she would require
him to speak louder.
Pat got angry at this. and, turning
to the lady, said:
'Begorra, If l cold shout any loud
er l wouldn't use your bloomin' ould
telephone at all l"-Tit-Bits.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1918-05-22
FRECKLES
Now Is the Time to Get Rid Of These Ugly Spots

There's no longer the slightest need Of feeling
ashamed of your freckles. as othine-double
strengths guaranteed TO remove these homely
spots.
Simply get an ounce Of othine-double
strength-from your druggist, and apply little
Of II night aud morning and you should soon see
that even the worst freckles have begun to dis
appear. while the lighter ones have vanished
tirely. 1t is seldom that more than one ounce
Is needed to completely clear the skin and gain
q beautiful clear complexion.
Be sure to ask for the double strength othins
as this is sold under guarantee Of money back
n It fails TO remove freckles.-AdV.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1918-05-22

well and feel fine in the morning and
able to do my work. l gladly recon-
mend Lydia E. Pinkham's Vegetable
Compound to make weak nerves
strong. - Mrs. ALBERT Suite, 603
Olmstead St, Winona, MINI.
How often do we hear the expression
among women, al am so nervous, can
not Sleep" or cit seems as though /
should fly" Such women should profit
by Mrs. Suites experience and give
this famous root and herb remedy,
Lydia E. Pinkham's Vegetable Com.
pound, trial.
For 10. y years IL has been overcom-
ing such serious conditions as displace-
ments, infiamK alton, liberation, irreg-
ularities, periodic pains, bsckache, dir
ziness, and nervous prostration of
women, and is now considered the STAN
dard remedy for sucn ailments.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1918-05-22
Pass the Mustard.

"Who was that old guy 1 seen you
wild at the City club yesterday
asked Hop, who, OF course, was only
talking that way for fun and not be
cause he don't know no better.
"That was very interesting man."
answered Sarb. Hes an old salt, with
peppery disposition"
Il thought he was n well seasoned
looking chap" said Hop. with shrek
of laughter.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1918-05-22

State OF Ohio. City of Toledo Lucas
County-ss
Frank ]. Cheney makes oath thar he Is
senior partner of the firm of +. ]. Cheney
a. Co., doing business in the City OF To-
ledo County and State aforesaid. and that
said firm will pay the sum OF ONE HUN
DRIED DOLLARS for any case OF Catarrh
that cannot be cured by the use of
HALLS CATARRH MEDICINE.
FRANK j. CHENEY.
Sworn TO before me and subscribed in
A. D. 1888.
(seaD A. W. Gleason. Notary Public.
HALLS CATARRH MEDICINE Is taxi
en- internally and acts through the Blood
on the Mucous Surfaces OF the System.
Druggists, 75c. Testimonials free.
f. ]. Cheney & Co, Toledo, Ohio.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1918-05-22
A Sucker.

Banker Henry z. Dawson, the head
of the Red Cross, said at an artists
banquet: Gentlemen, once went in
for painting myself. l once enameled
a bathtub.
MY friends sought to discourage me
in my artistic aims They said. It's
no use going in for painting unless you
stick 10 your work
Gentlemen, did so.''
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1918-05-22

30 Dhu 4 CuuIu uOt
rest at mig 1t
would lie awake and
get so Lervous /
would have to get
up and walk around
and in the morning
would be all tilad
OFT. I read about
Lydia E. Pinkham's
Vege table Com
pound and thought
] would try it. Ny
nervousness soon
left me L Hleeu
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1918-05-22
PATRIOTIC Non-Gardener.

Going 10 have vegetable garden
this year,"
mo. for patriotic reasons"
II don't understand you"
Last year / tried a vegetable gar
den and learned that 1t would be
more patriots Of me to leave valuable
seeds to the men who know how to
raise crops This year I'm not going
TO waste a single seed that real farm
ers can make use of."-Detroit Free
Press.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1918-05-22
May Be Bad Enough Then.

Hobbs--I understand that you have
hired our former cook.
Dobbs-But don't be alarmed. We
intend to discount everything she tells
us.-New Haven Register. -.., .,---,.-, =
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1918-05-22
SUSPICIOUS.

"Why didn't you engage that cook,
my dear7 She had excellent refer
ences."
"The woman who wrote 'em is par
ticular enemy Of mlne."-Louisville
COURIER Journal
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1918-05-22
The Solicitous Senator.

The SoIIcItous Senator.
"Have the war appropriations gone
through"
mot yet. senator. I'm glad to see
you so interested"
Yes. l want to tack on a little
salary increase for a constituent of
mine"
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1918-05-22

When a doctor loses a patient and
he isn't sure of the cause, he attributes
1t to a complication of diseases.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1918-05-22

A new device which has recently
been patented win enable anybody to.
scale a fish quickly.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1918-05-22
At the Moves.

what cid the villain say just then? 2"
II don't know wasn't looking. -
Chicago News.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1918-05-22

What some men need is curb that
will prevent them from butting in.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1918-05-22
Sizing iiIn Up.

Sizing F1in1 Up.
June-"Can he trace back his ances-
try far?" Jessica-"Not very far for
a man who cannot earn over SIS a
week"
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1918-05-22

One touch of nature makes the
whole world kin and two touches ins-
dictate an EASY mark. !
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1918-05-22

81 understand Jaggs is in fine health
and full of spirits" Full of spirits7
Why, / heard only yesterday that he
was on the water wagon"
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1918-05-22

AS for honor among thieves, they
are Just ms bad as other people.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1918-05-22

A woman never feels dressed VI
unless she feels uncomfortable.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1918-05-22
TIE Reason.

Il saw Biz this morning and ht
looks all gone to pieces"
mo wonder; he's broke"
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1918-05-22

An Easy One.
81 want a good motto for my book
on sea travels"
"Why not try sic transitT"
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1918-05-22
WOMAN'S NERVES
MADE STRONG
BY Lydia E. Pinkham's
Vegetable Compound.

Winona, MINI. -"I suffered for more
than yee- FROM nervousness, and was
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1918-05-22

Kenosha - Federal agents, working
in Kenosha, have rounded up six men
charged with seditious talking One
of the men is alleged to have buried
important parts of war products, to
prevent prompt shipment of them. The
names of the men are withheld, but
federal agents are here making further
examinations
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1918-05-22

Fond du Lac-The body of J. F.
B~inkerhoff, SO years old. city clerk
for Waupun the last three years, was
found in his home. A bullet wound
was the cause of death. No explana-
ton is known.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1918-05-22

Madison-The University of Wiscon
sin cantOnment. quartering 400 troops
from Iowa. is under quarantine for
scarlet fever. There are now fifty
patients in the University gymnasium,
where the soldiers are CHARTERED.
Maiden Rockville knitting on the
last sock of the twentieth pair she had
made for the Red Cross, Mrs. Eliza
Heath, 49, a pioneer, passed away at
her home in this city. The body was
found by her daughter.
Neenah-A weekly newspaper, writ
boy scouts. will be issued here soon.
The scouts have purchased a printing
press and type.
Manitowoc - Another new hotel.
along lines similar to the Manitou. re-
Gently opened, will soon be erected on
Washington street. John NJ Kadow
will build the structure.
Neenah - The Eastern Wisconsin
Electric Railway company has filed a
request with the Wisconsin railroad
commission to discontinue the opera
ton of the local street car here
Marinette - S. r. Brough has been
appointed by State Fuel Administer
Fitzgerald to succeed w. E. Morton as
fuel administrator for Marathon coun-
ty, who has resigned
Neenah-Mr. and Mrs. J. J. Fish
celebrated their golden wedding an
niversary May 19 with family dinner
at the Valley Inn.
Wausau - While bark has not in
creased in price, a big shortage is like.
ly, as many mills will not even at
tempt to peel hemlock this year. due
to the shortage of labor. A 80 per
cent decrease in production is antici-
pated.
Prairie du Chien-James Mckee, a
town board chairman of Vernon ccun-
ty, was killed instantly when he step
ped out of an auto in the town of
Christiania 10 inspect a road An auto
driven by Ole Olson Aas, coming from
behind, ran into him.
Residents Of Racine county
are endeayoring to arrange that the
81 men leaving May rs for Camp
Grant 90 on a special train in order
that on the evening previous they
may be guests at a banquet and ball I
to be given in their honor.
Racine - Prospective dairymen in |
Texas. and other border states. are |
buying up all the mich cows il the /
market here at an average price Of /
S175. Stock buyers at Corliss shipped /
FIVE carloads Of mixers by express to /
Texas and Arizona farmers.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1918-05-22

Princeton-Green Lake county farm
ers have bought cooperative lime
stone crusher, since it was proved to
them that the land in their county was
quite generally acid. The crushed
limestone is being produced at half
price.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1918-05-22

Oconto-Eigbt hundred square feet
Of mushroom beds have been planted
in the barn Of Hunter Orr by himself
and Mark Karbon and fungi are al
ready. beginning n show above the
soil.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1918-05-22
VISION SIN
HAPPENINGS
News of the Badger State Arranged
....... in Condensed Form ......
OBSERVATION-DISCLOSURES

Madison-When a clerk in the office
of the secretary of state stuck a paper
knife into an envelope to open it, a
powder sitter over her hand and caus-
ed violent itching. "a COW itch pow
DER was the report of an analysis by
the chemical department of the state
university. The powder has been turn
ed over to the postal authorities.
Racine-The police are seeking an
unidentified man who entered the
boiler room of the power house of the
Milwaukee Electric Railway & Light
company here and opening one of the
furnace doors. threw into the fire the
body of an infant about months old.
The body was nearly cremated before
discovered.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1918-05-22

Viola-To have his neck dislocated
and live is the unusual experience of
Amassa Williams. The injury was
sustained through a fall downstairs,
and Mr.. Williams was about for
weeks before the increasing pain
caused him to undergo an X-ray ex-
animation and learn the truth.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1918-05-22

La Crosse-Closing a street car door
before a passenger had alighted, a
practice which has resulted in many
for $4,000 being filed against the Wis
consin Railway. Light & Power Co,
by Mary A. Madley, local woman.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1918-05-22

Kiel-Eliza Demunck, widow of the
late Abraham Demunck, who was
charged with the poisoning of her hus-
band, was dismissed from custody
by Court Commissioner Phelan at
Sheboygan, the state having failed to
establish any evidence to impilcate
her.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1918-05-22

Green Lake-During a recent wind
storm a large American flag on the
cottage of Rev. r. S. Ingraham was
torn away, but next morning it was
found flying uninjured from a nearby
treetop. Mr.. Ingraham regards this as
an omen presaging victory for the
Stars and Stripes.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1918-05-22

GAINESVILLE - Earl Scoville, former
employe of local newspaper, is held
under arrest by the Carranza govern
ment in Mexico He was taken into
custody with two other newspaper men
charged with writing articles deroga-
tory to the Mexican army.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1918-05-22

Argyle-John Wagner Of the town
of Ridgeway has the following record
of the capture of Wild animals the past
season seventy muskrats, bounty.
S36.05: thiTty-seven skunks, bounty
$I1075: nineteen coOns. bounty s47.
three minks, bounty $l2; fifteen foxes,
bounty 1920; one weasel. bounty ST.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1918-05-22

Racine - Prospective dairymen in
Texas. and other border states. are
buying up all the mich cows il the
market here at an average price Of
S175. Stock buyers at Corliss shipped
FIVE carloads Of mixers by express to
Texas and Arizona farmers.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1918-05-22

Oconomowoc - Archbishop S. G.
Messmer of Milwaukee ordained the
Rev. Fathers Aloysius Kipells of St
Paul, Frank Berg of Milwaukee. and
Aloysius Pregenzer OF Chicago to the
Redemptorist priesthood at the Re
demptorist college chapel at Lac La
Belle.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1918-05-22

Madison-The University of Wiscon
sin cantonment. quartering 400 troops
from Iowa. is under quarantine for
scarlet fever. There are now fifty
patients in the University gymnasium,
where the soldiers are CHARTERED.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1918-05-22

Kenosha - The federal government
has approved the schedules for the
completion of the Sheridan road thru
Kenosha county and has ordered the
road completed this year The Ken.
osha portion of the road has been
known to tourists as the worst road in
Wisconsin.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1918-05-22

Randolph The Rev. Otto Engel,
pastor of Friedens Lutheran church.
in an address delivered in honor of the
boys who left to fight on foreign bat.
tleflelds, urged his hearers to support
the cause of America by making great
sacrifices. A service flag was dedi-
Gated.
Vernon County censor. [volume] (Viroqua, Wis.) 1865-1955, 1918-05-22

Observation-Disclosures of Racine county
are endeayoring to arrange that the
81 men leaving May rs for Camp
Grant 20 on a special train in order
that on the evening previous they
may be guests at a banquet and ball
to be given in their honor.
Free trader-journal. (Ottawa, Ill.) 1916-1920, 1918-06-10

Sealed bids will be received by the
undersigned until Tuesday June lllh
1915 at O'clock A. VI for the furnish.
ing Of coal to the pumping station CT.
taWa, Illinois. as follows;
2oO0 tons OF Slack more or less, or
'oo0 tons Of Nut. more or less, or
.uo tons Of Mine Run more on less
Prices are requested in either Of the
WO ways.
filst. to be delivered and weighed
at pumpiGr station
Second f O & cars Ottawa, either
on switch tHera of Rock Island K Il
near pumping station or switch track
Of G, Il a Q west OF pumping station.
Contract to date June s. l9ls, and
run for one year
A certified check Of 10 per cent ~
the amount OF bid must accompany
each bid The successful bidder will
be required te furnish bonds Tor the
faithful performance Of contract.
The right is reserved to reject any
or al bids.
W. W. CURTIS,
City Clerk
Free trader-journal. (Ottawa, Ill.) 1916-1920, 1918-06-10
The New Library.

A stranger watkins thru 4 small
town that was rapidly developing,
came upon "A lonesome red hrick build.
ms IN the main street.
Seeing native lounsing outside, he
approached him.
What building IL this?'
This? Oh. this is the new free Ii
brary only Just opened. And bless The
man who built il sir bless him"
"Ah, my friend, thenS0u are book
lover, like myself? That is good And
probably, until the free library MAS
opened, YOU were hnsble to browse
upon the beauties IT, english l.iteId-
lure. Shakespeare WAS unknown to
you. The rhapsodies Of Keats and
Shelley, The stately prose OF Matthew
Arnold. The delicate Writings OF Char.
les Lamb, for which your starved
mind 80 hungered, We're denied N0u.
Now this DeneiaClOr has presented
Tins library the portals of The realms
OF gold are open 10 YOU, ana !ou are
free 20 wander~-"
ION, come ori it, sus-nor' Not ike.
~. Reason is that my missus as been
ont o WORK Tor SIX moyths, aud she's
just got the cleanin Of TINS bulld.
my"
Free trader-journal. (Ottawa, Ill.) 1916-1920, 1918-06-10
Layi 4 the Corner Stone,

The corner stone laying had been
Il brilliant success. The weather was
tint, the speeches eloquent, the music
impressive. The master OF Cereno.
MES was very well satisfied with HIM.
self. YET with the dispersal OF the
crowd he became strangely excited.
Hurriedly he sought The master ma,
son.
is ii possible To lit the corner
stone again he asked.
i am afraid mol, sir, SAID the ma.
son. Have you Il particular reason
for asking"
Il have. said the master Of cere
monies, I've left my hat in the re.
ceptace along with the records"
Free trader-journal. (Ottawa, Ill.) 1916-1920, 1918-06-10
Absent.minded.

An absent,minded scientist, in the
employ of the government At Wash.
'as,on, recently met his physician on
the street.
Il don't know what's the matter
with me, Doctor said the man Of
science. Il am limping badly today.
DO you think its locomotor ataXia %
Scarcely that replied the physi.
clan. You are walking with one foot
on the curb and the other in The gut.
ter"
Free trader-journal. (Ottawa, Ill.) 1916-1920, 1918-06-10

ALWAYS BUY TICKETS AND SAVE
MONEY.
Free trader-journal. (Ottawa, Ill.) 1916-1920, 1918-06-10
A Subordinate Position

Now said the bridegroom 10 the
bride, when they returned from their
honeymoon trip, let Us have Il clear
understandings before We settle down
10 married life. Are YOU The president
or The vice president of the socieiy?"
Il want to be neither president nor
vice PRESIDENT she answered Il viii
be content with subordinate posi-
ton"
lie" What position is that my
dear?'
She--"Treasurer."