davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington times., 1918-11-17
the Kaiser Contest Will Be Announced Tomorrow Times

be incIosed In q huge sound-proof cell.
with bare stone walls, on each side Of
which the following story should con-
front him in letters OF gold:
"Once there was q Kaiser. His
name was william He and God were
partners until Willie declared bank
ruptcy. One day Willie thought II
win conquer the world" But he for
got to ask his Uncle Sam II he would
Let him. So he tore up his promises
and marched over Belgium He even
get near Paris. Then he met Uncle
Sans marines and soldiersi Listle
Willie saw stars. Now William softly.
sings Nearer, Ny God. to Thee to the
tune OF Yankee Doodle"
VICTOR e. REICHERT,
Private, Medical Corps.
431 Fourth St, ". w.
The Washington times., 1918-11-17
EkhrhIt HIn Ina Car.

1 would have built a large steel
cage with the Stars and Stripes paint
ed on the sides and ends, place him in
1t. and exhibit him throughout the
United States as the beast who sunk
caused the killing of nearly 5.000.o 900
men, filled the world full OF MANNED
soldiers, burned cities. destroyed in
noeent women and children, shelled
churches and hospitals. Then would
turn him over to England and France.
o. F. PIRKEY,
p. D. Box IS, Strasburg, Va
The Washington times., 1918-11-17
A Rebuke By the Devil.

It's just a little story. and IT won't
take long to tell,
OF q sentence. after trial at the
DEVILS Court in hell.
Kaiser Bill, defendant, stood shaking
on his pins. -
While Old Satan ordered punishment
for the Hohenzollern sins:
"You little sawed-oh cuss, you
thought you owned this hell
of mine;
II thought 1t wouldn't kill the fish
I'd soak you in the Rhine,
But I'll take an empty barrel, drive
spikes in every stave,
A point for every man that died
through you. you dirty knave;
Then I'll dump you in the barrel, like
they often do with swill:
Then I'd send you rolling down a
steep and rocky hill;
Then I'll rub your wounds with vine
gar, with pain I'll make you
dance;
Then you'll realize the suffering you
caused to men in France;
Then I'll boil you up in coal oil and
bury you in lime,
To be sure you are extinct In the
shortest space Of time.
HARRY H. SHIELDS,
915 e street northwest.
The Washington times., 1918-11-17
Tu Hun for Murder.

In my opinion William Hohenzollern
should be tried for murder as speed
lily as possible with no more eonsid-
GRAFTON shown him during the trial
than is shown any other criminal tried
for a like offense before the bar of
Justice, and IL found guilty OF muir
der in the first degree, would have
him sentenced to work for the rest Of
his life in some Belgian coal mine.
and every pound OF coal thus mined by
this arch-criminal to be used in sup
port of a Belgian woman whose hus-
band or son had lost his life, direct
ly or indirectly. because of the in
vasion of Belgium by the German
army in 1914. y
]. ]. SHIRLEY, NJ. D.
1917 Swami street northwest.
The Washington times., 1918-11-17
Conascate PropertX.

Berlin is the place for him First
I would confiscate all his property,
and force the whole family to work,
then, in order that he could be easily
identified. would amputate an arm
and one leg. and, with a hot iron
would brand the word murderer on
his face, and force him TO live out of
the garbage cans in the alleys OF Ber-
lin
II the other writer's who have been
pronouncing sentence on him could
see what l see every day at the Wal
ter Reed Hospital, they would admit
that this would be very mild for his
deviltry. Some of the poor boys are
blind, some with their reason gone,
while hundreds OF them have arms
and legs gone. These boys are young,
and have to go through life MANNED,
The Washington times., 1918-11-17
Make Hin Itch.

I would confine the Kaiser in a
dungeon for seven years with the
"seven years itch" and cut off his
fingers SO he could not scratch. 1
would give him only bread and water,
and at the end of seven years 1 would
cut out the water. Then when he
cried for eater I would give him hot
lead on his lying tongue, made from
the bullets gathered from the battle
fields OF Belgium and France. All this
sentiment about permitting him to
live for remorse to punish him is mis-
placed II he had a conscience or was
susceptible to such a feeling he would
not be alive today.
II this should win the IS prize
please send It to the Red Cross.
SIMPLE JUSTICE.
The Washington times., 1918-11-17
show Him He was wronx.

He made a lifework Of his military
machine. and thought II was a knock
out until the allies drifted by In their
1918. twelvs-cylinder model. with auxii-
larry Yanks. The saddest possible
blow to Willie would be to see the
two machines compared. and to under
stand where his was inferior. To 10
this / recommend that he be Jalxen on
n tour OF inspection embracing every
phase Of the allied war-machino In its
undeniable supefiority. This tour
would extend to every corner Of every
allied land. However. when the addcd
light Of allied endeavor broke N upoa
his befogged Intellect. would con-
slider the punishment BETTING the
crime. FRANK u. CROSS. Jr..
500 p street
The Washington times., 1918-11-17
Tarfune Hin.

Put him in a dark, dismal cell where
no light could be seen. Give him
moldy bread: make him drink stale
water; give him a good cowhidins
every day for fifteen minutes. Make
scenes of his barbarous men murder
ing women and children. Torture him
by cutting off his whiskers. making
fun OF his defective arm. Make him
labor by cracking hard stones, and
make him long for death so he can
visit his mate, the devil, in hell.
W. ]. BELL,
1912 street southeast.
The Washington times., 1918-11-17
Cage Hin.

I would suggest that he be Gagged
like q wild beast, and exhibited
throughout the width and breadth of
the entire world-haye him securely
Gagged SO that no excited person could
do him injury: charge a nominal
price of admission and am positive
Barnum & Bailey's income would be
a pittance compared to the receipts of
one days profit in this undertaking.
Devote the proceeds to the rebuilding
of the devastation done to suffering
Belgium and other countries.
CHARLES H. TURNBULL,
407 Fourth street northwest.
The Washington times., 1918-11-17
Drive Hin Insane.

Have the artists. cartoonists, and
all who have participated in the pic
turization OF the German invasion
and occupation unite with those who
have verbally drawn the suffering
caused by the Hun and eollaborate in
presenting to the >devil's ablest as
sistant,s each morning, one picture
and one lecture, the latter denuncia-
tion to be read aloud by the ex-
Kaiser. No more conscience-seartng
torture could be devised, as death
from insanity would be the probable
result and what better revenge could
these unfortunate people ask than to
have their own sufferings react and
kill the perpetrator, slowly and
surely. G. p. MONTAGUE
The Washington times., 1918-11-17
Set Him Adrift.

I'd set him adrift on boat with
bread and water as his only diet
then I'd aim torpedo after torpedo
at him, but make a point to miss him
so that time after time he'd su1er
the tortures of suspense and fright
ten times more than the Lusttania
victims did. Then I'd take him to
Brussels and let him be a vassal OF
King Albert. In this way you'd pay
him back in his own coin. and show
the world what becomes of one-man
attempt at domination of the world.
JACK STEARNS GRAY,
Culpeper, Va.
The Washington times., 1918-11-17
Worst Of Torture.

I would suggest that we should
make him a prisoner of King Albert.
After King Albert looked him over
he should invite some of the Belgians
whose kin have suffered and died un-
der Germany's slaughtering to look
at him. Then send him all over the
world so that the people may see the
animal who tried to rule the world.
After all the people have seen him,
then make him suffer by torture of
the worst kind, so he can see how IL
feels. SOLOMON FISHMAN,
81 H street northwest.
(Thirteen years old.)
The Washington times., 1918-11-17
Extrnillte Him.

He should be extradited to Eng
land. where the coroner's jury in the
Lusitania case has already charged
him with murder, and lodged in jail
as any other person so charged.
Arraign him, and IL he pleads
guilty, sentence him according to the
laws of England. in whose waters
this offense was committed. II he
denies his guilt, give him the same
fair and impartial trial granted an
ordinary individual, and let the YER
dict and sentence be carried into
execution.
I. p. STEINBERGER.
Bellefontaine, Ohio.
The Washington times., 1918-11-17
~Man without Country.

"An eye for an eye and a tooth
for a tooth" Is not in the code of
the allies. Death Is too merciful for
Wilhelm Hohenzollern. once emper-
or of the Germans; let him live In
exile, haunted by his conscience
or lacking that attrIbute-by MEM
cries that will be more bitter than
gall.
Let himlbe a "man without a coun-
try" lost to himself, hes people and
the worldly an exile on the face OF
the earth. in some barren, Isolated
spot-not sunny Corfu. the beautiful,
whittier, report has 1t, the former
Kaiser's thoughts are turning. Let
not the isles of Greece, whittier
thousands Of refugees have fled from
his wrath, give sanctuary to the as :
sassin. C. W. STUMPE,
American Red Cross.
The Washington times., 1918-11-17
Would FHog Him.

He should be put into a cell where
he would just have enough food to
keep him alive. Maybe he afterward
should be killed, though I say that
an American, an italian. a British, a
French. a Belgian, and a German sol
dier should be allowed to beat him
with all their might until he was
nearly dead. And then have him put
into chains. with his arms upward.
That would seem a miserable torture.
JACK POOLE as years.,
2651 Woodley rd., Washington, d. c.
P. S.-Also let the President get a
knock at him. And. finally. make
him bow down and kiss the American
flag.
The Washington times., 1918-11-17
A Pnefie PunIshnent.

The way to treat the Kaiser, If you
want to treat him right is to take
him in an aeropiane till he's nearly
out Of sight The pilot now should
leave him, in a parachute should drop,
end leave the bally Kaiser in his
helplessness. to flop. Surround the
plane with fighting scouts, let's say
a score or more, so they. with their
machine guns can pepper him galore.
But they must be very careful not
to hit the Hun, for to kill the bloody
The Washington times., 1918-11-17

who was put aboard a ship to sail the
seas forever-a prisoner-and never
again permitted to have vocal or
social intercourse with human
being. Let him thus be ostracized
completely from the outside world to
ponder over his enormous sins. Let
him thus 60 in exile, never to frater-
nize with his fellow men, but ever, to
be goaded in secret retrospection by
the great wrongs OF his past.
w. RAY LOOMS,
Assistant Superintendent, Document
Room, House of Representatives.
The Washington times., 1918-11-17

the abolishment of autocracy and the
development of Germany as a demo-
cratic, progressive nation and the en-
tire ruin and abolishment OF all his
ideas.
1 would keep him under the sever
est discipline, making him work ana
live entirely according to the VIII OF
his guardians, that he might never
know anything approaching ease ana
luxury. EDNA /. SAWDON.
The Washington times., 1918-11-17
Read Own story.

1 would place the Kaiser in COM
plete isolation with just food enough
of the plainest kind to keep him from
starving. For entertainment he
would have only tales of the fearful
atrocities his policies have caused and
cinema pictures Of ruin and desola-
tion, starving children and ravished
women.
The photograph would reproduce
the cries OF hate and execration of
those whom he has wronged. With
The Washington times., 1918-11-17
Let Metherr Decide.

T think that the best trial for him
would be or should be by the people
that has suffered the most. So why
not have the court made up of the
mothers of France and Belgium? All
this talk of giving him a long and
agonizing Imprisonment seems to me
would be the same thing that we have
sent our sons over there ID fight
against. Give him a trial and verdict
that will be a credit to the world.
STEPHEN F. TILLMAN,
1902 p street northwest.
The Washington times., 1918-11-17
Speeehleas Solitude.

In applying the generally accepted
principle of humanity we can deal
with the Kaiser harshly without de-
liberately executing him. To kill out
right such an arch-murderer would
not begin to atone for his misdeeds.
To do so would only serve as a
lasting example in the future course
of the worlds events. and would be
neither meeting out the punishment he
rightly deserves nor right the wrongs
he has committed.
Let him be ingloriously shackled
and consigned to the fate Of the man
The Washington times., 1918-11-17
WHAT WOULD YOU
IDO TO EX-KAISER?
tcontinued from First Page.)

ex.Kaiser? He has reaped his re-
ward as he has sown. The Bible tells
usi is not for US to avenge, but 1, the
Lord, will avenge the enemies. Let us
feed the afflicted nations. Germany
Included, to the best of our ability,
denying ourselves more IL IL need be.
and by so doing prove to our enemies
welhave forgiven them, as we wish to
be forgiven by our Heavenly Father
for our many sins.
MRS. w. NJ. WILLIAMS.
Boyd, Nd.
The Washington times., 1918-11-17
Let Children PunIsh.

would give a children's party and
play a donkey game. Use the Kaiser
for the donkey, attach the donkey tails
to nails, and let the kids place the
nails first into his mouth, eyes, and
into his flesh as far as they could go;
tongue, too.
VIRGINIA A. KAUFMAN.
(6 wears old) 1889 Lanier pl. N. w.
The Washington times., 1918-11-17
Decide at Pence Table.

Leave his fate to the men OF
serious minds, men of brains and in
telligence, the men who will sit at
the peace table. II there is any means
by which he can be brought to pay
the penalty 1t should be for them to
decide. as well as to formulate plans
and principles that will hereafter
make the world safe for democracy.
EDWARD A. O'BRIEN.
The Washington times., 1918-11-17

long as they live; also compelled to
always use the goose-step in march
ing and walking. A charge OF SIS
for one or q party not to exceed nve
persons, to be fixed for admission to
see the menagerie at work. All
profits derived to go to the orphans
of Belgium and France.
~ H. s. ROBINSON.
The Washington times., 1918-11-17
Put HIn ta Work.

Capture. the Kaiser. bring him back
to Belgium and France, confine him
with chains and make him work at
hard labor for twenty years on public
roads, bridges, houses, etc, that have
been destroyed by his ruthless war
servants. and that he should only
have the bedding and eats that his
sailors had. c. w. GREEAR-
The Washington times., 1918-11-17

He should be banished to some
God-forsaken island, where In idle
ness, he could think over all his
many crimes. Daily newspapers OF
the four years of hell" that he has
caused could be sent to him daily.
and all articles citing instances OF
inhumanities, murders, and ravish-
ings could be marked so that he could
not possibly see without reading.
ORD. SGT. Z. /. LETUG,
In / St N. w.
The Washington times., 1918-11-17
Work Them All.

Arrest and try by a court appoint
ed by the allies. every officer. from
the Kaiser down Qet II be 100 or
100000, who are possibly responsible
for the frightfulness and inhuman
warfare. Take everyone convicted
and confine him in a specially pre-
pared institution located at some
central point where they will be COM
pelled to work ten hours each day, as
The Washington times., 1918-11-17
ADVERTISEMENT
Cured His RUPTURE

wal badly ruptured while lifting .
trunk several years ago. Doctors said my
only hopS Gf cure was an operation. TruEses
dil me - good Finally I got hold Of
something that quickly and completely
cured ne Years have passed and the rup-
ture has Cever returned, although am
doing hard work a. . carpenter. There
was n operation, no lost time. no trouble
! have nothing TO sell. but will give fulI
Information about how you may hnd q
complete cure without operation, II you
write to ma. Eugene n. Pullen. Carpenter
HOE harcsllus Avenue, Aanasquan. N. J.
Better cut out this notice and show Il to
any others who are ruptufed-you may
o. 'e . life or at least stop the misery Of
rupture aud the worry and danger OF an
operation.
The Washington times., 1918-11-17
send Hin to Siberia.

Danish the ex-Kaiser to Siberia.
where the atmosphere will cool
his fiendish blood, giving him plenty
OF opportunity to reflect on the past
four and one-half years Of atrocities.
GEORGE H MCMILLAN,
SO N street northeast
The Washington times., 1918-11-17
Put Him I'm CIrena-

Somebody ought to go to Holland.
get the Kaiser, bring him to America.
and put him in the Barnum and
Bailey circuA
WILLIAM w. ADAMS,
% Bryant street northwest
The Washington times., 1918-11-17
Lei r Roll.

What real. done to the
Kaiser u to take a barrel and ham
mer nails on the bottom. top and side.
and put the Kaiser In IL and take him up
on Thirteenth street hill. and put the
top on the barrel and let II roll down
the hill at the rate OF about twenty
miles an hour. and then when IL stops
rolling look IN the barrel and see
what is left OF poor Kaiser Wilhelm.
BERNARD ZARIN (Aged IL
10 Thomas st. n. W.
The Washington times., 1918-11-17
Put Hin On Exhibition.

Put the Kaiser on exhibition fol
the benefit OF the Red Cross, Saliva
ton Army. and Y. NJ. c. A.
EDWIN SOMERS, 10 years,
1900 Massachusetts ave. NV.
The Washington times., 1918-11-17
Put Hin on Ant Hin.

1 would have him brought over to
the States and stripped. his hands and
feet tied, and then have him put on
the red ant hills until he is dead.
]. T. SMALLEY.
800 c street northwest.
The Washington times., 1918-11-17
Make him shIne shaes.

Tar and feather the Kaiser with
game cock feathers and make him
shine shoes on Unter Den Linden.
L. p. WOODWARD.
Alexandria, Va
The Washington times., 1918-11-17
Urge. solitary Hard Labor.

The ex-Kaiser ought to be put in an
iron cage and placed on exhibition
and the proceeds turned over to the
Red Cross. Then he should be con-
signed to solitary confinement for
life at hard labor.
CHARLES T. CHANEY.
CLANCY, Nd.
The Washington times., 1918-11-17
John Early Would Approve

No punishment is too severe for
him. Even leprosy is not too severe.
Put him on a lone island filled with
lepers, and make him a servant to
them all.
HAROLD LUBER. IL years.
S23 Fifth st. N. w.
The Washington times., 1918-11-17
Leave IL To E0ch.

Can you imagine anything that
would please the world and also dis.
please the Kaiser more than to let
Foch finish him after the Foch fash
ion?
Should I win. turn my IS over to
the free milk for France fund"
r. R. RECORD,
Westory building.
The Washington times., 1918-11-17
ShnHe His Head.

I would suggest that the exLKaiser
be treated like all criminals and con-
victs-shave his head and dress him
in a striped suit of red. white, and
blue.
G. A. D., Washington.
The Washington times., 1918-11-17
ST. HeIena for Hin.

Confine him for life upon the is
land of St Helena-let this again be
the final home OF the dreamer OF
world empires. and in the still si-
lence Of his confinement, let him suf
fer the pangs of ''The Man Without
a Country" Do not hasten the time
when he must meet his Goblet him
live in fear OF it.
B. c. HARRIS,
Room 1l9. House Office Bldg,
The Washington times., 1918-11-17
Give Hin a Trial.

Let the ex-Kaiser stand trial for his
misdeeds, and am sure that he will
possess so much manhood to abide by
the sentence which will be meted out
to him and then execute the sentence
in the shortest possible time.
w. B.,
U. S. Soldiers Home.
The Washington times., 1918-11-17

and would 1t be right TO allow that
insect to spend the balance OF his life
in luxury?
A READER OF THE TIMES.
Walter Reed Army General Hospital.
The Washington times., 1918-11-17
The Zoo for Him.

Take the Fritz" to the zoo and
put him in with the lions. where he
belongs-they'n do the rest
MRS. ]. F. LEMINGER.
The Washington times., 1918-11-17
Put HIm m YIctory Parnae.

IN the victory parade, he should be
conducted by an iron chain, General
Pershing holding the other end. For
the remainder OF his life he should
The Washington times., 1918-11-17

$4,000. 900. which would go far to-
ward paying on war debt Of allied
nations. Mrs. ". B. HARRIS.
1901 Irvine street northwest.
The Washington times., 1918-11-17

Flowers for social Funetions. eeH
Guides home grown flowers and artistic
are supreme. 1914 = st-Adyesn 3
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1918-10-09
Need Straighforwardness for Business Merchant Says
Who Conduct Greats mkond0n

This war has taught the public many things and,
among Others, the value Of publicity. The pro-
greSslYe business man has been conscious of its
magic possibilities for years but now there can be
without It. nothing can get done. For publicity or
advertising, Is the art of making known something
of Importance or general interest.
The government once more has had to take
leaf out of the business mans book and learn to
advertise. No business enterprise of any size
can exist without publicity as a means of getting
into touch with peoples minds and needs and
purses. No single idea can bear any fruit until by
publicity it has permeated the intelligence of vast
numbers of thinking folk.
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1918-10-09
Straightforwardness Best

1t is publicity that has created highly sensitized
receptive national intelligence and to thwart this by
unwiSe censorship, whether of war news books, or
plays is a weak and stupid policy. Business adver
Using proves repeatedly that straightforwardneSS is
the only policy.
1t costs huge sums for a business man to turn the
Searchlight of publicity on to his own enterprise
Dishonest publicity defeats its own ends; it
makes no deep and lasting impression, which is
what every business man wants.
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1918-10-09

ginning Of this year we were, the sixteenth largest
house of the kihd, In the verdi AT the end of this
year we will be the sixth. Within two years after
the new stsfe building Is completed we viii be first
Talks to Millions
A BIG factors very big factor--tn thu record
has been and will continue to be neVVspaper advcrN
Using. We never could have broken through these
traditions over here without Il. We had to Use all
we could to break down prejudicea
We made people stop, lock and listen. Then the
store itself did the rest
We now talk to millions Of people every day
through cur advertising columns, and they Believe
In US, trust US respond to that advertising quickly
and continue to be our customers In ali kinds of
weather.
The large business enterprise that 4 not going
the limit IN advertising Just now Is making q huge
mistake.
Now, more than at any other time, it Is necessary
TO push the display advertising, The business man
who fails to realize that right now--in wartime
he should drive ahead with his advertising at greater
speed than ever has overlooked a golden oppor-
tlnitH
AT no time in the history of our business here has
advertising paid such large returns as right now
My only regret is that can't buy more space.
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1918-10-09

To spread the news of things to publish interest:
ing facts abroad to stimulate mems mlnds-ih short
TO advertise, make known-haS become an art:
Painters, craftsmen writers have lent 1t grace
business minds have given 1t lucidity and point BY
its means an advertising expert can make phuno:
graphic record on that most mpressonabe disc
the public f1ind-creating markets; selling goods,
or Gas It has been seen) achieving service for the
state What other force exists that can accomplish
all these things
Increases Advertising
On August S. 1914, the day after war was de-
clared increased our advertising space From
that day have been buying all the advertising
space available. would do more advertising today
If could get the space
We are limited only by the limitations Of the
newspapers We are taking right now every inch
they will give US, and at rates that would make us
in the States turn somersaults and fail ever back
wards.
am paying at the rate of 81 per agate line for
display space right now | will take more space IF
they will give it to me-and at that rate.
The first four months of this year have been the
biggest four months in our history. This growth
has come because we have forced it. AT the be-