Arizona republican., 1918-05-26

DhESSMAhlNG ana plaln sewing. 514 N. Ninth St. gs AN OFFSPRINGS PARENTAL RE-
 SPECT
 Pop said my sc- Did you ever ob- serve human skull closely?" q knew something was up his sleeve) Have you studied the lines, and the inter- woven lock stitch which joins the seams, and the various paths which cross and recross?" I replied in the affirmatively: Well Pop, do you know that with years these fastenings weak en, and seams open?" 1 said yes, but tinued, have you examined YOUR cranium of late ?'-I replied negatively, which was not lie. Pop, it behooves me to inform YOU that the cracks in YOUR bell hopper are expanding" express'd great surprise: Sit down, he continued; I shall arrange mirrors and by them show you how near your approach is to that subject of person. ality, donned a brainless fool" Phew! l xclaimed:-"Now, said he, raising my snowy locks, put your finger here: Feel the aperture? Now here;-note the depression? Now here:-Detect the gullies and ravines?" I sighed in acquiesience.-"Good enough" Pop, I'm grieved to express myse'e on the debit page, your too far gone to learn. Your head is filled with poetic gush , you deem yourself witty, you simper when with ladies, and when beauty" appears, you act like an old gink: :"- 'All this is significant, Pop, and I deem the time ripe to press the pedal and affectionately advise you to quietly go off and after saying your prayers, migrate from this coast to the land where troubles cease, and endless de- | light doth prevail" Tn other words, Pop" your course Is run" Say: that, boys, got me guessin: I always con- sidered him a precocious skallywag and even in youth very cute. Here's one he tells on me at home prayer | meetings. When courting mamma, at the period when young men mixed l their own hair oil. fof bears grease l and bergamot) Pop wasn't satisfied with profusian, he applied effusion. l Now, passing the odor, (surpassing skunk juice) this excess of grease. when warm, liquified, and Pops long black hair afforded straight lines for | it to traverse toward coat flap and celluloid collar, unobstructedly, so be- tween the violet @ aroma, and the melting grease, mamma told me, the situation would paralyze a stone inn age: In those days the furniture was of hair cloth design, and very slippery and l speak truth, (mamma said so,) the glaze of that covering, saturated with Pops fabrication made 1t SC slippery, that he glided right off into mamma's Ian. and d. if he didn't pop the question instanter, despite smell, oil. emulsion, or convuls'on.' I'll tell no more yarns on the boy: He gets me. Say friends these "remini- l sences'' of mine fail to bring results
 I fear my competitors who hand me
 the horse laugh, and tap their fore. heads with premonition, when I pass are correct when insinuating tha
 Ford's little weak in his "tuppet."-
 1 shall look to you for strength, sup.
 port, encouragement. and christian
 counsel, but will rely on Mex, Dago
 Russian, Hun, Indian, for the almight,
 dollar. the root of all evil" I shal
 not list all of my big stock today
 and it is big, but shall importune vol , to sell whatever you have to dispos
 of, to me. I buy in large or small lots
 pay cash,-all I can afford, and mak
 no rotten promises or talks. Whel
 you are ready to sell. call me:-Whel you want a windy appraisement cal : elsewhere: You must say yes or n to my bid. If you wish credit call ol
 my son. IA E. Adams. Formerly Ed
 wards. Bird, Furniture Col Larg , stock, new furniture. He will ex . change also.
 GEO. o. FORD
 40 g. Central Ave Phone 177e. 1