Tulsa daily world. [volume] (Tulsa, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 1905-1919, 1918-06-09

Thev tell US that people In the
country are early risers, but they are
not in It with city people, partlcu-
larlv those who pick it off the trees
IN Central park. II there Is ever
ANYTHING as large as a nickel hanging
ON any Of the trees after o'clock in
the morning l have not yet discov-
cred the fact.
I do not mean to say there is not
plenty of money in New York. for
there is. There is moEe money in
New York than in any other city In
the world, but the one slight diff
Guilty is that somebody has got all OF
It. II hasn't rained gold certificates
once since ] have been mere, and
when anyone loses q dime they tear
up Broadway pavement looking Tor
1t. They are very generous here.
They will let you work Just as hard
as you want to-
Easy 10 Invest.
The opportunities for Investment
in New York are wonderful Really,
they are unlimited. A man can in
vest a weeks salary here SO quickly
that is only child's play and re-
ouires no training at all.
The only thing you don't have TO
tip In this town is your hat, and that
IA because you don't know anybody
Sahd nobody knows you.
And II you slip a waiter or bell
hop anything less than n quarter for
services unrendered he looks at you
as though you were combination
OF kaiser and Won Hindonburg and
an apostle of super r-frightfulness,
Some of those boys have weak hearts
and a dime has more than once been
fatal The war seems to mean moth
ing to them. They don't care how
much your expenses have risen in
the past two or three years. The
bellhop In one club here Is worth
$4,000, and he hasn't carried a
pitcher Of ice water to any man In
nine years who Is worth as much as
he is.
A friend OF ours, who is a con-
! lfirmed Gothamite of two years
'standing. says you can live as cheap
iy In New York as anywhere else
And you can--if you live with your
wife's folks.
If you can get along without eat
'!ng. sleeping or wearing clothes,
would say that you can live here as
cheaply as you can in Oskalopsa,
lowa, or ChipmunkS MO-: but it is
n
>. doing any Of those thiags.
~ Money Least of Problems.
Getting rid of my money has been
one Of the least of my problems since
4 have been here--a matter of sew
ral yearS-and ! don't believe | will
N{er encounter any serious difficult
g in that regard. II there is any
body who has a-natural distaste for
money and hates to have ii around
him would say the place for him is
In New York. A 81 bin doesn't make
any more noise than one of the oys-
ters at Oyster bay, there Is so much
other noise going on In the neighbor-
hood.
A five chirps family and n ten is
slightly audible at certain times in
certain places, but 1t takes twenty
to speak right out in meeting ana
' command the respect of the audi
once. and even q twenty won't hold
the stage more than minute or two.
The only cheap thing in New York
70 buy Is Brooklyn Bridge. A man
from Indiana bought It last. week for
SS5 ana 1t has often been purchased
at cheaper figure.
Last week 1t was my misfortune
to be obliged TO stay at hotel for
three days while Luella, my wife,
was away visiting friends who have
country place. The first time It
cost me So cents TO get to my room.
/ crossed with silver every color OF
palm from white 90 tan, chocolate
and ebony. The following day |
saved SO in tips hy staying in bed
all day and sneaking down the fire
escape in the evening to find a one
armed restaurant.
Wise Ones Know Now,
But that sort of thing applies only
to the hicks like myself. The wise
heimers around this town know how
TO hang on to theirs. Only the ANA
teur New workers. feel that It is a
disgrace to eat in a one-armed cafe
or dodge. .thS palms Neither do the
seasoned New Workers think It a dis
grace TO sit in the balcony. II there
were no volunteer New Yorkers here
the theaters would be all balconies
and no orchestra floors at all.
II Is the boy who is here for the
nrst time who loosens, II he pays
less than S2.5O for a show he thinks
1t isn't any good: If he can't paw
ten bones a throw for opera tickets