The Brookings register. [volume] (Brookings, Brookings County, S.D.) 1903-1971, 1918-10-03

N1 hNduNht'y ihNtlC IIC W tCli
him any new one that l might have
heard. Some of the stories we ex-
changed were more or less risque and
would be out Of place In these pages,
but / do not mean to intimate that
there was anything very much amiss
with them. They always amused him
very much and he was quick to catch
the point.
The kaiser's sense Of humor fire.
quently exhibited itself. He told me
Of a conference between representa-
tives of all the powers regarding the
selection Of a king for Albania after
the Balkan war. Some Of those present
thought the incumbent ought to be q
Catholic, others insisted that a Greek
Catholic was essential, still others
maintained that a Mohammedan would
be most logical.
1t seemed quite impossible to come
to any agreement as to Just what re-
ligiOn the king Of Albania should pro-
TESS, and the kaiser had ended the dis
cussiOn, he said, with the suggestion:
swell. gentlemen. If a Protestant
won't do, and n Roman Catholic won't
do. and n Buddhist is out of the ques-
ton, why not select IA Jew and call him
Jacob the First? He'll have his throat
cut, anyway, In three months"
The powers did not select a Jew, but
the prince Of Wied, the kaiser's nomi-
nee. was put on the throne, and within
q month or two afterwards had to flee
for his life.
In referring to RoOsevelt's patriotic
offer to lead an army In France, the
kaiser declared that he admired him
for his courage and zeal.
II hear" he said. shat he Is now on
his way to Italy. 1t Is too bad we did
not postpone our offensive there. Per
haps we might have captured him.
Wouldn't Teddy look funny In q gas
mask?"
Shortly after the U-boat Deutsch-
land made its successful trip to Amer
lea. the kaiser called on me, and he
was In a very jocular frame of mind.
/ happened to mention to him that I
planned to 60 to America the following
summer In connection with the porce.
lain tooth l had ~patanted.
well, 1t went he necessary now,
Davis" he commented. 1--WE can send
the Deutschland over and bring back
a boatload of tccth!"
FIX my tee'f well, Davis" he de-
clared or another occasion, 80 that I
can bite, There are lots of people
It'd IKE a. bite! /" and he snapped
his jay together In o way that would
have b1aed IL for the victims he had in
mind. although his remark was evi.
IDENTIFY more facetious than vicious.
The courtesy and affability which
n kaiser almost invariably displayed
In his relations with me did not pre-
vent him on n occasion from show.
ing his indignation when I touched him
upon what was evidently a very sore
point-the part that America was 60
Ing to play In the war. although he al
ways claimed to be uuperturbed about
the American situation.
He had pointed out that America at
that time had only 10000 men in
France and he believed that the u
boats would effectively prevent any
great addition to our forces abroad, II,
indeed, they eve left our shores.
"As a matter Of fact, however" he
added, "yOur countrymen would be
very willing. no doubt, to fight for their
country to protect It from invasion,
but l don't believe you'll ever get many
OF them to leave home to fight abroad.
America will really be q very small
factor In the war. Davis!"
"Your majesty is Understanding
the power Of America I" l replied.
He turned to me Indignantly. and In
his most imperious manner exclaimed !:
I'VE underestimate no one! We
know exactly what we are doing!
How seriously he was mistaken In
this respect has since been sufficiently
proved.
No matter how gloomy the outlook
Tor Germany, the kaiser seldom show
ed concern. It Is true that whenever
things were going wrong, as when the
Russians In the early part of the war
were sweeping everything before them
In their advance on the Carpathians,
he and the rest Of the royal farily
kept az far In the background as pos
atble. whereas when the German cause
was triumphant, as In the case Of the
offensive against Italy. he could not
make himself too conspicuous at the
front.
But even when Germany's adversely
was greatest the kaiser always put on
q brave front. At such times / have
seen him stop In the street. after leav-
Ing my ONCE. and before the hundreds
Of people waiting outside to greet him,
SYSTEMATICALLY put . cigarette In his
mouth and light II. that everyone might
nOuce how steady his hand was and
Now llttle he was worried by the turn
things were taking.
~ Tie same time. On one or two oc-
enHlons after the war started. ! noticed
thot ~ acted differently when In the
16ntnl cn1lr than had been his custom
vhcn overythlng was serene.
GkA A.a~-H~~~ h~~~AA4 - go That