The Washington herald., 1918-05-31
Ala't Ii Queerf

- e~Nt
ledge. how you spec me to lib
wild a man wot keeps on beatin' me:
Eff ah went a whole day widout get
tin beat up ah would think dat de
worl' was comm to an end"
why do you keep on living with
him them" the court asked Margaret
Thomas. who was complaining against
Isaac, her hubby.
We'll, ah will tell yo Jedge, why an
libes wild dat man." answered Mar
garet. Hes got $3.63 ov mine en-
won't give 1t to me. Ef he would
gimme me nah money ah would light
out en- neber come back sgin."
DO you mean to tell me that YOU
are risking your life for $3.S3?" asked
the court in surprise"
Nah life is wuth dat much Jedge,"
said Margaret. "Hits wuth s3.SS TO
nah husband to keep me home en-
its wuth S.s3 for me to hang aroun'
till ah gets nah sS.63''
The court failed to understand her
logic-or rather her arithmetic
Isaac had nothing to say. He never
did talk very much when Margaret
was around. (she did all the talkingI.
iett nave you got 1Ot
beating your wife so much?" the court
inquired of Isaac.
TO keep her FUN beatin' me,
Jedge," said Isaac, satisfied that he
had made the proper answer.
You can pay a fine of $50" said
the court and stop acting like you
had studied "kultur."
The Nerve of Him.
Every time Maude Reynolds passes
a certain corner some rough party
speaks to her.
This has been very annoying to
Maude, having strange men speak
ing 10 her on the street
She stamped her. foot and deter
mined TO put an end to it. BY gosh,
she would. and right away.
Wednesday, she went to the store
to get a bottle of baby food-for
her sisters baby.
Jim Willis was as usual loafing on
the corner. He saw Maude when she
left the house
Dunno know nobody does yo kid
do:" inquired Jim. as she came by.
Nav, en- All doesn't wanna know
you. either, you black-faced monkey"
snapped Maude.
Needn't git fresh wild me gal"
retorted Jim. a trife peeved.
The boob reached out and grabbed
her. He kissed her. She hollered
and scratched his face.
A cop heard the noise and came
up and nabbed Jim and charged him
with assault.
He swore that he knew Maude in
court But Maude swore the other
way.
And the court ended all the swear
ing by fining Jim $25
More Than Mere Superstition,
Somebody told BETTY Jamison not
to sing before breakfast as IL was
bad form. She was sure to be cry-
ing before suppertime. they told
her
She would sing anyhow. 1t was
in her and just had to come out.
Along about o'clock the Same
afternoon as Betty was ironing
she heard some loud talking on
the sidewalk.
She stopped, looked. and listened
Then she got real mad.
She dressed hurriedly. She went
TO nearby yokamee joint.
Seated in a corner was her beau
making Eoo-goo eyes at another
woman. He was holding her hand
too. the brute.
Yelling at the top of her yoic.
Betty rushed up and grabbed her
rival by the hair.
Shouts of murder in Chinese rant
the air. Dishes flew every direc.
tion.
someone got a cop. He separa,.a
the women and locked Betty nm
sure enough she was crying be-
FORE suppertime. And not a sou1
came around to console her.
She still showed the effect. ~
sleepless and fearful night wban
the court fined her $40 and warned
ner not to repeat the offense.
The wsyward Youth,
II nearly broke old man Ke.f.r,.
heart to come into court and ask ths
Judge to send his only son to iail.
But IL had to be done. His .on
Murray had worried him To death
Not only that. the boy had stolen
from his own mother and then abused
ner when she asked him to return
the money.
The boy won't work. his father snid
Nc losfs around poolrooms ali night