Payette enterprise. (Payette, Canyon Co., Idaho) 1909-1935, 1918-03-21
Mr. SIMPKINS PAYS
HIS INCOME TAX
BY ROBERT Mc5LAlR.


ached now for two reasons: First, he
reverenced and adored the memory of
his father; secondly, his age and his
eyes and his game leg wouldn't let him
20 TO WET himself. And as he observed
the martial bearing and uncompromis-
ing gaze of Colonel Simpkins he saw,
in imaginati ton, the KHAKI! clad lads of
the new generation marching forth and
crossing three thousand miles of sea to
fight, maybe die, for liberty.
Mr.. Simpkins peered around to make
sure that neither Bess nor John (who
were at the teasing ages of sixteen
and seventeen) were where they could
see him, then he Strengthened and
threw his right arm up for a salute
But his equity shoulder twinged, and he
groaned. He couldn't even salute
Damn p said Mr.. Simpkins, and
with his other hand fiercely twirled his
white mustachios.
He turned and limped into the H.
brary and sat down creakily before the
mahogany desk on which were lying
the blanks for his income tax state
ment, blanks which he had rather
grumpily got from the Internal Reve-
nue. officer only that day after lunch-
con on his way home from the club.
Mr.. Simpkins' income for 1917 had
amounted to just about $4,000, and he
had been rather snappy on the sub
iect of taxes ever since he had discov-
cred that the more income a man has
the greater the percentage of 1t he
pays in taxes. He could think of sew
eral men who, like himself, were mar
ried and had two children, and yet,
although their incomes were nearly
half of his, they would pay only a
small fraction of the amount he paid.
lie gloomily drew the blank nearer
and began filling in the information
that it asked for.
AS Mr.. Simpkins' income was $4,000
he had to figure out the amounts pay
able on each of the successive smaller
classes of incomes in order TO arrive
at the total due from himself. He
passed over the first class who must
pay taxes, that is, single men making
over 1000 His calculation for mar
rled men then showed up as follows:
First, they pay 2 per cent. (under
the 1916 law on all income over
$4,000, deducting 5000 for each of their
under eighteen years. In Mr..
Simpkins' case this was $212, which he
put down in the payable column.
He saw next that, under the 1917
law, married men pay an additional
per cent. on all over S2,O00-with the
same allowance for children. This
added $3.50 to his payable" column.
He then observed that for every
50, 800 jump in his income over $1,000 !
he had to pay a SurtaX, the percentage |
growing larger with each jump. This
was $3.50 more added to his burden.
And on top of all this came an 'Ex-
cess Profits" tax of s per cent. on all |
'occupa ton" income over $4,000, MAX
ng S720 more.
The total, then, he must pay was four
zen hundred and thirty-four dollars.
"Whewr exclaimed Mr.. Simpkins |
lngrily. There's young Henry Will |
lins, who married Jake Johnson's girl,
lie makes $1,000 and he doesn't pay
,ent. of taxes. / guess this is his war
is well as mine"
Thinking of young Henry wilkins,
lie remembered that Mrs. wilkins went
very afternoon to make bandages for
he Red Cross and that Henry, who
vas lawyer, was aiding the Local
Draft Board with it's missionaries.
We'll" he admitted to himself,
that makes a difference"
He thought next of Judge Willough-
y. whose income was about $1,000.
"He only pays 500" commented Mr..
impkins, not quite so angrily this
ime: and then a thought struck him
nd he sat up rigidly in his chair.
Judge Willoughby's son had been
rowned on the Tuscania when it was
ubmarined with the loss of two hun
red soldiers.
Judge Willoughby gave his son to
.merica," muttered Mr. Simpkins.
He leaned forward suddenly and put
Is face in his hands.
For long time Mr.. Simpkins sat
cry still in that position. There was
o sound In the library except the
cking of the tall clock and an occa-
onal trill of laughter from the chill
rem slylarking upstairs. The square
light on the carpet gradually with
rev itself through the window, and
rst twilight and then darkness settled
about the quiet, white haired, some
mes irasclble old man. :
Mr. Simpkins was thinking things
hich he would never afterward speak
), he was thinking things that were
10 sacred ever TO be put into words.
ut some inkling of his thoughts may
, found In his rejoinder to Mrs.
napkins when that placid lady came
and turned on the lights, and asked
IN whether he was ready for dinner.
Judge Willoughby's only son was
orth as much rs fourteen hundred
Id thirty-four dollars, wasn't he?" =
r. Simpkins demanded of her.
AS his wife, who was not unused TO
$ superficial irrltatlons, watched him
mild establishment, Mr.. Simpkins
nped out 10 the hall and took his