The Washington herald., 1918-05-22
Bat Was Right.


Maude Keane and Jerry McCan-
trilI room at the same house.
Jerry got a room there because
he wanted to be near Maude, with
whom he was keeping company.
This was during last winter. And
with the warming up of the weather.
Jerry's love for Maude has gotten
quite cool.
Sunday night Jerry's other girl
came around to see him and brought
him some CLAIMS.
The pair sat on the front porch
clamming away to beat the band.
Maude was upstairs in her room.
She felt as though she hadn't been
treated quite right.
4 While later. Jerry was bothered
by a constant tapping on the head
!, Maude had half brick tied on
clothes line. bouncing it on his
head. The rope was an inch or two
too short to allow the brick to
bounce very hard.
"Pears to me-" said Jerry to his
new girl. dat it am ruther early
I for bats to be flying 'roun'. yet All
The girl to whom he was talking
right" she said. zen durn yo skin
ef it hain't a brick bat at dat"
! Jerry ran upstairs. He heard
Maude snigger. He grabbed her and
! turned her across his knee.
You have no right to paddle n
grown woman" said the court; pay
fine Of $40"
q. The Brute!
Last Saturday night about o'clock
; Ethel S:urgis started downtown TO
! buy pair of shoes.
! She met Ben Garnott. her old
/ time beau. Ben asked where she was
/ going and all about it,
With the result that he got Ethel $
! 81 and Ethel got no shoes that night.
/ He didn't exactly borrow the
money. Ethel let him have it be-
cause she was afraid OF his big fists.
! However. the next day she told
her troubles to Isaac Miller. a coal
! HEAVIER. Isaac was her new love
! and protector.
! Sunday noon found him at Ben's
{ house. He intended to get that 81
or get Benny.
He got both. Ben had shot some
craps and won quite a pile.
! Not knowing who he was, Ben
! let Isac in and without a word Isaac
! lit into him and tore him to pieces.
| And then to rub it in, Isaac drag
ged him around to where Ethel was
! and made him get on his knees and
! apologize.
/ Ben got real mad about this part
of the program. He had been at
, tackled first by Isaac and he had re-
dress in the court.
However, since he all but stole
/ Ethers money, the court couldn't see
where he was hurt very much and
, fined Isaac but s..
Lemme at EN-.
Joe Watson had a jag and s.
bill.
He got on a Ninth street car Mon
| day night with his sense of humor
stimulated highly.
! And he offered the conductor the
$ to take out a nickel.
| Cant. change that" said the con-
ductor handing back the five.
4 We'll. 'spose yo tear off a leedle
bit Nv de corner Nv dat bill en- call it
| square, suggested Joe.
e"Gainst the law to mutilate money"
answered the conductor. Got no
time to fool with you. Get off,"
Joe wouldn't get off. And so he was
put off when the car got to New
York avenue.
| A crowd of people had gathered to
, watch the negro and the conductor.
/ Joe got sore at the boots from the
crowd. But he was too picked to
| fight.
| He managed to struggle through
the crowd and walk away.
Policeman Norris came running IN
to see what was wrong. He heard
Joe challenge everybody on earth to
| fight.
Norris also learned few new cuss
| words from Joe, as the latter IVA 3
stumbling along, trying to get away
before some one accepted his chai-
| lenge to fight.
Joe landed in the lookup. Norris
couldn't stand by and see him get a
terrible thrashi.z.
-frA~ G>N-s. c--ed Joe $25.
His Wife the Boss.
"Jedge. All has been married nearly
thurty yeahs. En- doin' all dat time
All hasn't had chance to say two
words"
what was the matter"' the court