The Washington herald., 1918-01-18

Special Correspondent of The Washington Herald
New York. Jan. 1s.-lt was the cold
est day of the winter. John Rooney,
who has a warm heart and a hot
head, was doing his janitor duties
about the Yorkville Court Of which
he is master. Suddenly one of Mr..
Rooney's sweepers threw down his
broom and had a good hard cry.
Mr.. Rooney approached him seeking
the scent of liquor, but the sweeper
assured him his grief was OF the sober
type and that he was in tears at the
thought of his heatless home and the
discomfort therein. Mr. Rooney as
sured the worker that he would have
a ton of coal for him in a jitfy.
He called a coal firm and gave TO
them the number of the sweeper's $
town house. One hour later a driver
with a cauliflower ear and a beauti-
fully blacked eye howled through the
basement of the courthouse that the
ice had arrived. Mr.. Rooney came
forth and asked the decorated chariot
eer just what was on his mind. and
was informed that there stood with
out one ton Of ice as per order.
Il ordered COAL" roared Mr.. Rooney.
You lie." stated the driver. who
:
trouble enough.
And / wanted it sint somewhere
else" added Mr.. Rooney.
"Yere off yer NUT" said the gem
tleman driver, "and if yeh come out
here I'll slap y from under yer hat.
v boob. Whaddaye think / am any
way"
Mr.. Rooney's opinion of the driver
RnthnGia bod laGGanad
teriaIiy and rapidly. Behind him the
sweeper was beginning to cry again.
Mr.. Rooney went to the telephone and
the coal company told him he had or
dered ice and they didn't want TO hear
any nonsense about it. In addition
they didn't care for any more of his
trade, and Furthermore. he had better
get over the habit of talking through
saXophone or with marbles in his
! mouth.
Mr.. Rooney then went out 10 the
driver. but he was a block away. say
ing things that sounded simply awful.
So Mr.. Rooney went back TO the
sobbing sweeper and told him TO shut
mp. And outside the wind howled.
Leon Trotzky. the Russian foreign
minister who is trying his best to
perpetuate the Harry Thaw OF Pots
dam, is well remembered among the
night birds at Jacks restaurant. He
used TO appear there with Benjamin
DE Casseres, the poet
De Casseres found Trotzky in THE
Gilded Snake" in West Eighth street
He introduced him to Frank OMal-
ley, Tad Dorgan. and other Bohemians
Trotzky was like an elephant in a toy
store and bucked around proclamating
himself. He wore one pin, a Water
bury. and had L cents.
He is known to have borrowed cents
from Jack Francis. a Broadway press
agent, to buy a haircut one night in
one of the dingy Scent hair-cutting
places. He drank rum, cursed Wall
Street and smoked inpumerable foul
smelling Russian cigarettes. This is
the man who is now trying to be
president of the Planet.
War has come to the relief OF blush
ing newlyweds. No more will they
be pelted with rice by their enthu-
siastic friends IL the edict OF New
York hotels is followed generally.
There were five weddings in two days
at a hotel last week and afterward
pounds and pounds of rice were swept
up by hard-working housemen. 1t was
figured out that a pound Of rice will
feed family and that the waste In
rice throwing in New York hotels in
year would feed an army for a
month. Thus rice-throwing is barred
in the future Nothing is left now
but KIDNAPPING the bridegroom and
other little similar and innocent pleas
ures.
A migratory Hindoo has anchored on
Broadway and has opened up shop
where he sells nothing but fortune
telling crystals and he is reported to
be doing a big business. Many OF his
customers are lonely women and
mothers OF some who have gone to
war.