The Butler weekly times and the Bates County record. (Butler, Mo.) 1918-1950, 1918-05-02
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S u N B E A M S.

H1I'vc been away
longer than ! cx-
pected. You see. listened TO the fool
who sad that welcome Robin was 4
sure sign OF spring and made gar
den. That's been six or eight week,
ago. Since then have done very
little else than keep up a fire to heat
water to keep the garden sass from
fire, lin. m tutin a gun for this
wapply jawed. one-eyed, son-of-a-
mud-,urtle and when l meet him !!
mean to furnish him free transporter
tion into the sweet subsequently.
The chief aim OF man is to glori
iy God and raise hogs. ! notice he
usually raises the hogs first. The
chief aim oi woman is to spend the
money the old. man gets for the hogs.
There are as many different signs
OF spring as there are people. Ic
one the robin. to another the blue
bird. ~ still another the twittcr II
the frogs. Me: O, just mcandcT
asin Il tree Ia allay the irritation
caused by my silk underwear or in
other words, scratch my back. Then
know that spring has came
You are your own best friend and
also yuur own worst enemy, No one
can do So much ior YOU nor do yo,,
more injury as yourself. -Acqualll- |
lance, should be few and we'll chosen.
They may come i'll handy in a pinch /
but your one and only dependable
friend IS yourself.
You won't be held responsible tor
will be called To the carpet to a
count Tor the way you have used sad
talent Better find ont what your
talent is and be up and duin. TIE
day ri reckoning may not be far
away.
They Jay talk i, cheap" Mes. But
quite 4 few people are iindin' ont
that talk i, expensive as we'll as
dangerous In times like these sale
plan is 10 think couple Of times be
fore you spcal; and ,len,~dont.
They are talkn' OF conscriptin' all
u
million dollars and usin' it for the
army. New. why don't they take al
OF it. Who wants to worry along TT!
in to keep up appearances on paltry
million. Why life won't be worth
Twin.
The beautiful feature about HooE-
erizin' and substitutin' is that it costs
about three times as much to prepare
said substitutes in order to make
them ea,able as the real goods cost.
But while it costs us more we are :
savin the wheat.
- Me: Well I've hooverzcd so In
ten,cly that | am so thin that in case
| do 60 To war. II be in no danger
OF being >hot--ii | only have time to
turn edge wise.
Show me a man who says he never
was worth KILN nor accomplished
any1hing worth while till after he was
married and II show YOU man who
never did anything after he wa, mar
ried trNccpt to make some woman
Reuben, Reuben. We been thinking
How our cause it would promote
Ii all women should be moving
To the states where they can vote.
Il. +. $. some time since.
Rachel. am almost certain
Ii the women WISH to go
Where their votes will all be collnttG
Iii be the last to say them no.
= --Tennyson !. Daft. right now.
Reuben, rncc again I'm thinking
You'd not stop for idle talk.
If the women should be moving
You'd go too. ii you had to walk.
Roswell y. NJ. II. F. X.
D. you Reubens. am thinkin'
Some female has got your goat
And you'll be pickn with the
chickens,
When the women SET tn vote.
S. !.
| don't presume to even remotely
predict when the war will end. But
inless it does end feel quite sure il
will never stop. But ! may say, il
closing:
Twill be Xmas eve iI Berlin
And the Huns will gather there
The song OF peace-good will to men
Viii float on the wintry air.
Then the kaiser's VOICE i'll the dis
tance
Bidding all tumult cease)
saying what will you have for ali
Xmas gift:
And the Huns will answer-Peace.
Be good till | come again