The record., 1918-03-28
Nh h.II2l, SEMPKMS PAYS
HIS INCOME TAX
BY ROBERT McBLAlR.

been promoted for valOr during the
Civil War and had died bravely on the
field of action. Mr.. SimpkinS' throat
ached now for two reasons: First, he
reverenced and adorcd the memory of
his father; secondly, his age and his
eyes and his game leg wouldn't let him
20 to war himself. And as he observed
the martial bearing and uncompromis-
ing gaze Of Colonel SimpkinS he saw,
in imagination, the KHAKI; clad lads of
the new generation marching forth and
crossing three thousand miles of sea to
fight. maybe die, for liberty.
Mr.. Slmpkns peered around to make
sure that neither Bess nor John (who
were at the teasing ages of sixteen
and Seventeen) were where they could
see him, then he Strengthened and
threw his right arm up for salute.
But his equity shoulder twinged, and he
grOaned. He couldn't even salute.
"Danm" said Mr. Simpkins. and
with his other hand fiercely twirled his
white mustachios.
He turned and imped into the IL
brary and sat down creakily before the
mahogany desk on which were lying
the blanks for his income tax state,
ment, blanks which he had rather
grumpily got from the Internal Reve-
nue. officer only that day after lunch
con OH his way home from the club.
Mr.. Simpllins' income for 1917 had
amounted to just about $4,000, and he
had been rather snappy on the sub
ject of taxes ever since he had diScov-
cred that the more income man has
the greater the percentage of 1t he
pays in taxes. He could think of sew
eral men who like himself, were mar
ried and had two children, and yet,
although their incomes were nearly
half of his, they would pay only
small fraction Of the amount he paid.
He gloOmily drew the blank nearer
and began filling in the information
that it asked for.
AS Mr.. SimpkinS' income was SIS, 900
he had to figure out the amounts pay
able on each Of the successive smaller
classes of incomes In order to arrive
at the total due from himself. He
passed over the first class who must
pay ldAcS, iiLtL Is, SlllSic lllcH
over 1000. His calculation for mar
ried men then showed up as follows:
First, they pay 2 per cent. (under
the 1916 law) on all income over
$4,000, deducting 5000 for each Of their
children under eighteen years. In Mr..
Simpkins' case this was $212, which he
put down in the payable column.
He saw next that, under the 1917
law, married men pay an additional 2
per cent. on all over $2,OO0-with the
same allowance for children. This
added $252 to his payable" column.
He then observed that for every
$500 jump In his income over $1,000
he had to pay a Surtax, the percentage
growing larger with each limp. This
was $3.50 more added to his burden.
And on top of all this came an "Ex-
cess Profits tax of per cent. on all
"Occupa ton" income over $4,000, MAX
ing $72O more.
The total. then, he must pay was four
teen hundred and thirty-four dollars.
"Whew!' exclaimed Mr.. Simpkins
angrily. There's young Henry Will
kins, who married Jake Johnson's girl,
he makes $1,000 and he doesn't pay
cent. Of taxes. guess this is his war
as we'll as miner
Thinking Of young Henry Wilkins,
he remembered that Mrs. wilkins went
every afternoon to make bandages for
the Red Cross and that Henry, who
was lawyer, was aiding the Local
Draft Board with its questionnaires.
hn 70
THAT makes a difference"
He thought next of Judge Willough-
by, whose income was about $4,000.
"He only pays $20," commented Mr..
Simpkins, not quite so angrlly this
time: and then thought struck him
and he sat up rigidly in his chair.
Judge Willoughby's son had been
drowned on the Tuscania when it was
summarized With the loss of two hun
dred soldiers,
Judge Willoughby gave his son to
America" muttered Mr. Simpkins.
He leaned forward suddenly and put
his face in his hands.
For q long time Mr. Simplins sat
very still in that position. There was
no sound in the library except the
ticking OF the tall clock AMI an occa-
siOnal trill of laughter from the chill
drcn Skylarking upstairs. The square
of light on tire carpet gradually with
drew itself through the window, and
first twilight and then darkness settled
in about the quiet. white haired some
times iraScihlc old man.
Mr.. Simpkins waH thinking things
which he would never nfcrwnrd speak
Of, he WAS thinking things thni were
too sacrcd ever TO he put into words
But some iul,Iing of his thoughts may
be found in his rctoiudsr 10 Mrs.
SimpkinX when that placid Indy came
in and turned on the lights. and asked
him whether he wnH ready for dinner.
"Judge Wiioughby'S only son was
worth as much as fourteen hundred
and 1lirty-rour dollars, wasn't he?"
Mr.. Simpkins demanded Of her.
AS his wife, who was not unused to
his superficial Irritations, watched him
in mild astOnshment Mr.. Simpkins
| limprd out to the ball and took his
old felt hat and silver-hcaded cane
from the hat rack. Letting himself out
llllO l1c iOSSy CNtiiibtS. HC LttplCu liio
WAY down to the corner, and mailed his
income tnx statement and check with
his own hands
"E5yT, God be thanked" said Mfr
| SimCkI1:k as the lid clanked shut over
| his missiye, 81 can 90 this much nur
my country, anyhow
Any Osh=r taking mac hine may bt
had apleutv. AZ any season, but Vic
rrcas, madr in many rmes create,