The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1918-10-19
KITCHEN POLICE
Will Enjoy Telling of Their
Experiences.
Interesting Tale OF What the
X. p. Is.
BY w. S. TRAVIS,

When this war is over the men who
have been in. the army will be glad
they have had the privilege of K. P
Kitchen Police. They may doubt it
row, but they will believe it then.
The first full realization of this will
come when the soldier boy clasps to
Should they wed? He favors it, but
she is skepticai. Here he has come
home whole and there isn't any war
insurance to live on-where will they
get the cash? "Ah," he whispers in
her camouflaged ear, but 1 have had
K. p. experience, Millicent. All will
be we'll" Randolph" she will softly
Will Face Father.
Then he will have to face, father.
Father will expect it, and have on his
lips the conventional question about
the style in which she has been ac-
customed. But Randolph will see it
coming, and side up to the table and
begin to rub a book OF plate briskly
back and forth like a scrubbing brush,
sort of absent-minded and casual
like; and the sign will be understood,
and it will be a joke with papa.
And then they'll get married. And
some evening tie old folks will drop
w
around tie fireplace with full tum-
mics and empty minds. somebody will
suggest to Randolph that he tell them
about K. p, and what visions will
float before his eyes!
Tell a Pretty Fairy Tale.
What will he tell them? Maybe it
will be a pretty fair story about the
way it helped him prepare salads for
| his wife's table, or wash the dishes
clean. But right down in his heart
he'll have different picture.
He will remember how he got up
with a sigh about every so many
mornings apart, when he read his
name on the bulletin board down.
stairs. He assumed a sepulchra1 air for
the day)lwhen he started down, clad
in his BVDS and shoes and pants, for
the Iabors of the day. After that it
does. not seem clear; just mixed up
mess of scrubbing tables with scour-
ing powder and a floor brush, scrub
bling the tops and the bottoms and the
sides, and scrubbing the ends. and
taking the tables apart and shining up
the pals, all to the satisfaction OF
the mess sergeant and the cook. There
floats before his eyes a mountain
high pile of dirty dishes; awfuily dirty,
syrupy, buttery, sugary dishes, that
the white clad chef politely informs
him must be clean and dry and back
on the table within three-quarters OF
an hour or off goes his head.
In n Pool of Water.
Then he seems to be standing in a
pool when he tipped the mop-bucket
over as he scrubbed the splintery floor
and drenched his last remaining pair
of socks. And there are pots and
pans. He knows just how boiled rice
sticks to the bottom of the pan when
| it gets too hot. He knows the same
good old formula of the securing pow.
he hrI1 riv
| on the floor, to clean those pots and
| pans. He knows what it is to stick his
! hands in soapy water so hot it puffs
| his finger nails. and then when he
cools it off and gets it too cool, he
| knows what it is to have the white
| clad chef remind him that he wouldn't
| need more hot water if he hadn't beer
SO slow.
He knows what it is to stick his
! thumb in red-hot gravy bowls, and
drop them on the floor. with that ever
present and ever thoughtful chef max,
| ing remarks thereon. No matter how
long he lives. Randolph can never for
get the ;4ngry cries of *. Pr *. p
| *. p" from a hundred hungry
mouths as the rest of the boys eat
| Mr.. Caesars Roman multitude would
sound like the peaceful babbling OF
| the brook beside it. And then how
he went back and took a carving knife
| as big as the back of the stove and
peeled potatoes and always got the
skins too thick for the almost pestif-
erous chef
Loads of Canned Goods.
| When loads of canned goods came
he will reminder. the K. P.'s carried
them carefully on their weary backs
When the wood box was empty, the
K. P.'s filled the wood box up, no mat
| ter if it rained. And just about then
will Randolph's horrid vision be brok-
en- off by some ones gentle query OF
Are you asleep, Randolph? 1 thought
| you were going to tell US about your
experiences of K. p"
And will Randolph tell them what
he has been thinking of? Not much
| He will remember that K p. was the
only thing that made Millicent his
bride; and that only the mystic sign
of the scrubbing brush kept dad from
! asking question he couldn't just then
answer. And a great joy will fill his
heart and soul. and he will tell them
sweet nothings; he will idealize that
| ever-present chef, and put a little
French mustache on his upper lip. and
everything. And Randolph will be
| d he d