Mexico Missouri message., 1918-01-17
RAY NEIGHBORS WRITES
NOT A GOOD PEARL DIVER
Former Mexico Boy-Learning "How
To Get The Other Fellow Before He
Gets You"

My Dear Mr.. Beal: suppose you
would like to know how 1 like the
army. It's the greatest thing of
ones life, if helikesit. Here am and
have been here almost a year and
haven't found out yet whether am
a benefit to Uncle Sam or not.
1 answer reveille at $50, which is
always the most sleepy period of my
rest. Then we "eat" mess-some
mess, too. Then comes fatigue call,
which is to police" the Company
Street for cigarette butts" and the
like, which is done by moonlight.
Sometime when the sergeants have
become little childish, homesick or
got the blues they spot out some
poor buck private for X. P. (kitchen
police). Personally 1 always tried to
be out of his sight at that time, for
1 never did make a very good pearl
diver when at home, and l know
am no good as "tin digger" in the
army, for all the cooking utensils
are made of that unbreakable mate
rial.
When all this is done we hear the
buglers sound drill call. Then the
detestable whistles (Which everyone
hates to hear), when he is thinking
of the lovely by-gone. days of his
childhood; then "fall-out," "fall-in,'
right less, front, squads right, col
umn right, march-then we know we
are going to beat out eight more
hours at 1872 pages per minute.
At drill we have bayonet exercises,
(which is very affecticnate mode of
warfare. Then about once a week we
go on hike of about 25 miles, car
rying full equipment, and when the
end comes you feel as if the world
were about to come to an end and
you look like the last rose of sum-
mer.
Then comes retreat, the time when
every soldier salutes the flag, and a
soldiers day of labor is over and one
more day nearer payday.
My company is now on guard,
guarding my regiment and the pris-
oners in the "guard-house.
On guard is where many amusing
things happen. The old joke is often
heard that while walking on post No.
21-the officer of the day was
around inspecting the guard, the
; guard said, Halt, who's there?"
"Officer of the Day." was the re,
ply. Say, let me give you a tip, ii
the Officer of the Night catches you
here you'll catch hell; better beat
= it,"
What else happens l couldn't say
Saturday morning is general in,
spection of your equipment, and ev
l erythiug must be laid exactly so OIL
your bunk, and not a speck of dus
on your rife or bayonet. If so, it il
very likely you'll have to report t
the woodpile to do about tel
days. They are never in want of men
for this is a dusty corner and yol
can't see it all. The inspector, the
seems to have microscopes in hi
head.
Speaking of dusty country, yor
ought to be thankful you're in"goo
old Mizzo," for this country has nc
come to completion yet.
f AS to the camp in general, it is lik
i to large city think there ar
: about $4,000 soldiers here; all kind
# of land forces, infantry, artillery, er
Is gineers, aviators, yes. and also abou
% every description of humanity.
o But they are all soldiers, gone fc
Is the Kaiser; killing is their trade, an
is they are learning their trade rapiC
ly. at the rifie-range and hurlin
themselves at the dummies used
IN bayonet drill, learning how TO wre
al tie, box and all that pertains to ge
y, ting the other man before he ge
er Won