The weekly Alaska citizen., 1918-04-22

Let tne kalSeT GTOau, OuueT Lip' erty Loan."
 THE IDOL John Kelly, he of IS NOW the versatile adver. SHATTERED. Using pen. amateur artist, amateur enter tainment generalissimo. Red Cross booster, in fact, aid de camp to any "get the money" function to be pulled off by Fairbanks. Fair Sex, has fallen from his pedestal with sickening thud. and all because -. We'll, that Is a matter Of opinion, but at any rate Johns ex- cuse that he only kept the records of the conservation cards that he received doesn't go. and newspapers never leave out any names. not even of those present at a society tea splash, and at least twenty-five per cent of the good wives of Fairbanks were not on the honor roll. and Johnnie must be to blame.
 One matron mailed her card next day with a red ink notation: "If you don't receive this one I'll send the next by registered mail"
 John has one friend among thosr also not present. The lady had been bookkeeper herself in her former state of single blessedness and knew that while liars often figure. records and figures do not lie, so she i'm mediately made for her husbands overcoat and drew forth two good reasons for her name not being on the list
 Remember the Tuscania--Bonds Defeat Germania."
 AN x.RAY It is quite the thing OF HIS now to study French MIND. You see. when our | boys get back from lover there," they will all speak French, and the girls believe in pre- paredness and are seeking every ac- complishment that will make them feel at home when they come back.
 When the girls speak French, then our registered boys must, and then If they learn the language of our dear allies they will be ready when their turn comes.
 With this end in view young R. Y. St. C. has joined the class. He has learned that all adjectives must agree in gender with their nouns as in Latin, and when the instructor. Mme. Charles Blaser. asked R. Y. to write "the flower" he immedi- ately wrote "la feur." Why do you write the flower in the feminine gender. MT. St. G.?"
 I Because flowers are pretty and must be feminine" Quoth Yancy. TALL The Tattler had oc- ITHiS casion to go into lS TRUE. pie foundry late one evening and. as is usual with the biscuit shooters and the main heaver when things are slack, their conversation turned to the great and the near great who have lived in Alaska. The talk turn. ed to one who have been a member of the Legislation" and had been quite prominent in making the "com- piled" laws for the territory. The discussion went along regarding some of the situations that the represen. tative would get himself into when arguing, and one of the kitchen crew remarked. "Yes, and he would dig in his hip pocket for the con- gregationar record to prove what he was saying"
 Dig in, Sammy; We'll dig up.
 WHO With the many con- SENT signments of socks THEM? going to the front it is only natural that some message of cheer be sent along also so that the recipient may know that someone takes an interest in their welfare From Fairbanks and surrounding towns many pairs have been sent lover there" and in all probability a note has been in cluded. The following story by a well known narrator will illustrate the necessity of putting the note where it may be easily seen.
 "A consignment of sox had been enlisted man who badly needed them secured pair. He put them on and strutted around. It was the first comfort his feet had known for a long time. But soon he found that