The sun., 1918-10-14

There went to France with the FIRST
draft an Irish lad with whom his own
mother had always been between a blow
and laugh. She tried to make a priest
OF him. but he fed TO the Gashouse dis
trict and became a great fellow around
the corner saloons. Presently he was
touting at the race tracks. He wasn't a
good lad and he wasn't altogether bad
lie was as generous as he was reckless.
The army got him and put him to
shooting at Germans vocation none
too exciting for this youth-and occa-
sional!y he has written a letter to his
mother. Tho last she got put her. as
she said. between the two familiar emo
tons. She would have slapped his i'm
pudent face until II was red Then she
would have Rugged him. But she laughed
when she revealed the breezy. impudent.
irrepressible phraseolosy OF this son Of
hers.
Makes the Parish Laugh.
The letter has made an entire parish
laugh. THE Sun has the privilege of
printing Thames, Of course. being
eliminated:
Somewhere at the Front in France.
Aug. 10. 1918.
Mt DEAR BENEFICIARY:
Your scathing letter OF July 10 at
hand and needless to say It found your
big. handsome son enjoying existence.
Now. darling. by the tone OF this vio-
let scented note you can readily see I
am in the pink Of condition. My step In
quick. my eye Is clear and my fertile
brain Is working overtime. The beer
muscles have melted from my Greeklike
figure. Dissipation Is scratched. I have
placed Church In the entries and with a
good ride we'll finish way UP in the
money.
I am thoroughly converted and here
after I'll be a friend OF the cops. I am
very sorry now did not follow your ad-
vice and become a member Of the cloth.
but the ecclesiastical calling did not APP
peal TO me then. I know you would be
tickled to death TO see Rev. attached to
my monicker. Just another case OF a
misguided youth.
Taking Holy Orders.
Never mind, old sparring partner.
every time a steel tube busted over my
handsome nut II found me murmuring
Our Father. who art In heaven" &c.
long before its fragments settled on
terra firma. Nothing lukewarm about
your dazzling Wilbur.
So you say paid you a visit.
His advice may be o. X. but all can
say is Truly Warner doesn't make 'em
small enough" He has the brains OF
Gunboat Smith. It's about time the fam
lily asked for waivers on him. Where
there's no sense there's no feeling" Give
him the ozone the next time he drops In
and tries to talk you into making a sky
pilot OF me.
His notorious son. after diligent study
and hard work, has been rewarded with
the glorious honor OF a promotion. He
Is now first class private. The other
boy, I'm told. Is working TO advance
himself from the rank OF common sailor
and become a sailor. I can see no rea-
son why, with the backing OF the COM
munity. the prayers of his family and
strict adherence to the straight and
narrow, that the finish Of the interna-
tional quarrel will not ind one son an
acting corporal and the other lad swab-
bling even an Admirals side OF the quar-
ter deck. Barnum had the right dope and
Sherman knew Ave or six. The old man
has as many friends as an alarm clock
Yes, old gal, do get lonely once In
while 1t was only yesterday / sat
thinking Of the old Visitation and st.
Michaels outings. Them was the happy
days Even the priest carried gun on
those rackets sure miss them this
month, but I'm going to pour this into
your shelllike ear Til be back on deck
for their next occasions. We got the