davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1918-10-24
ARTHUR OCHSNER.
Plain, Wis.
Pumpkin Time in Piercevi!le
o. D. Brandenburg sends the foil

O. d. Brandenburg sends the follow
ing sheared poem to this department:
When children's 'maginations git to
goin' at their best,
Look out fer NELL be there playin'
boy with all the rest
A case in pint, fer instance, wuz tn
punkin war today,
In which we built punkin fort-to hold
the Huns at bay.
Course l don't make p'tensions I'm
a sojer brave an strong,
But I've sure got some theories know
would help along.
The boys wuz playin' Army round tn
lower forty fence
I've never seen two young'uns play
as hard with big events!
They tended like tn pawpaw trees
wuz where tn Yankee guns
Wuz shootin' at tn punkins they had
nicknamed "yaller Huns"
But, trouble wuz tn battle got to ragin
full an free
Right where gethered punkins-an'
tn shells got hittin' me!
Now | amt posed to pawpaws as a
article of food,
But bein' plastered with them-that's
pint to be construed
AS calm fer a armistce, as prompt
as prompt kin be
You'd ort to heard me boiler when
them sojers Pershinged me!
Says /: Cease firm, Army! I'm yer
ally, goodness knows,
An though these punks is yaller,
they're yer friends an not yer foes!
Then | proposed some strategies tn
boys wuz quick to see;
Says l: Lets build punkin fort an
fight fer lberty!"
Well, say, us young'uns started in an
piled them punks so high
TIL boches never could surmount that
wall of punkin pie.
Why, if old Kaiser Bill could reach
this pieblest Hoosier sod
He'd throw both hands up in tn air
an yell: piece, kamerad!"
BY Wrl. Herschell
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1918-10-24
Morning Clories

Last spring l planted some morning
glories in the form Of a pyramid, ar
ranging strings for the vines to climb
They grew nicely, making a great
snarl at the top. They blossomed pro-
fusely and when at their best | count
ed one morning 1872 blossoms. Every
morning one or two humble bees
would come and crawl down to the
bottom of each aower for nice break
fast. / noticed every vine wound
around strings from left to right, and
tried to compel two OF them to wind
in the opposite direction but they pos
lively refused. Now the~ hop vine
winds around a pole from right to
left and just as stubbornly holds that
course; so you see it is the Inherent
law of their being Life obeys the
inherent laws of its beings. The
vast difference of actively in man
comes because of his great number of
mental faculties. In due time my
vine pyrmid ceased to blossom, was
loaded with seed pods and, l thought
it would be a formidable weed if they
were sown broad east on a pIowed
field
BENZ. SIMONDS.
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1918-10-24
True Allegiance

Mrs. w. Hewitt, Baraboo sends
following to the Ollapodria depart
ment.
Ven grst meet mine Uncle Sam,
He say, "You benn not worth a tam,
You hat no money in your sack
| ding hat to send you pack"
hang me round the wharf awhile;
Den, | see Uncle Sammie smile
He say, Il guess it been all right.
III let you stay here ofer night"
He knows | ben gren German, broke,
He treis on me to get yoke.
Next day he borrow me a fork,
haul manure by New York
| work me rount, | get some dough
My bank accound be begin to grow;
[ buy one pig / buy one COW,
[ send me pack, und get mine frau.
Then Unkel Sam NIT out request
Say, II gif you some farm out vest,
Vre you can lif and grow up great
Pc kaiser of your own estate.
And all that | will ask of you
Ist yust to our own flag be true"
size him up nit Kaiser Bill,
Und shake his hand, "Pry God I will. -
Und now got some big estate,
drive me round nit Hudson eight,
help the president to shoose,
vote for Wilson or Hughes.
And when the Lusitania es sunk
1t rifles me UP mine German spunk
hat the German in mine veins,
But got America in mine prains.
need no bombs fall me on head
To see die butter on mine bread
I say, mine John, we Yoin die fight
For Uncle Sam been in the right"
He say, 81 guess you be too old"
say, 81 help you nit mine gold
And now John wear dem kakhi pants
Und fight for Uncle Sam in France.
Und VEIN our boys go Offer the top,
Something's den will hat to drop,
They'll nefer stop to pillow or pant,
They fight like Roosevelt und Grant
They'll buck right dru old Hindy's
line
Und make a TOUCHDOWN on the Rhine.
Und We must help dem efery day
Nit Red Cross und Y NJ. G.. A.
Und here. veel ring the freedom bell
Till We blow dat kaiser all to hell
Exchange.
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1918-10-24
America First and No Other
Country for Him

Must say that your reply states the
fact that you are much more interest
ed in things that happen far off and
do not want to hear anything of the
crimes that happen in this county
To the question, what | would say to
the criminal acts you ask, will say
that all has been done to me except
carried into slavery. That is why
asked the question. Is crime that
happens far off bigger than if it hap
pens close by? | did not intend to
sympathize with Germany but |
think that all who commit a crime
ought to be punished. My intention
was not to start the war question, as
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1918-10-24
Who Knows
Baraboo, Wis.

In the long ago / as a boy read
in Sanders school reader number 3
a poem about Alexander the Great
a dialogue:
The SON
How big was Alexander, pa,
That people called him great?
Was he like some steeple tall
With spear an hundred weight"
The Father
ooh no, my son, about as large
AS I, or Uncle James.
Twas not his stature made him
great
But greatness of his name"
Son
"His name so great, | know it's
long,
But easy quite to spell,
And more than half year ago
| knew it very we'll"
| don not remember the fathers an
swer to this question but he must
have told of large armies and many
killed.
Son
did killing people make him
great?
Then why was Abdel Young
Who killed his neighbor training
day
Put into jail and hung?
Father
Alexander moved his army,
The killing was in war,
But he who kills a single man
His neighbors all abhor,"
Son
Then, il should kill single man
I'd kill a hundred more,
+ | would be great, and not get hung
Like Abdel Young before.
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1918-10-24

Now it was quite impossible for the
little fellow to comprehend the great
subject, and he seems to have the
best of the argument. War is part
of the means of advancement, in 9TH
err words a part Of the ways and
means of progress. There is no such
thing as eternal peace on earth. Man
kind would grow selfish and ungov-
ernable and under the name of per-
sonal liberty become arrogant and
lawless instead of human and gentle.
Then comes war to unity the nations
giving new aspirations and nobler eff
fort. Right has oftenest triumphed
as a result All things that exist,
however terrible, have theiru Sc The
mighty tornado destroys in it's path
way but the growth following it is
resplendent and beautiful All the
vegetable and animal kingdoms are
forever waring among themselves,
every weed determined to possess all
the land, all animal tribes the same,
and man no exception to the general
rule Yes, war and ambition are nat
ural and cannot be suppressed.
BENZ. SIMONDS.
BaraboO
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1918-10-24
beauty Of earth,

My companion, the wealthy and noble
of birth;
Bright mansions for them, but a pal
ace to be,
With the handsomest knight of them
all for me.
Here the palm tree should rise it's
stateliest form,
And flowers and fruit all the land
scape adorn;
Here should loneliness dwell, as no
where else seen,
And over it all, I would reign fair
Queen.
Then, as by magic. before this fair
maiden's eyes
Stepped bright Fairy Queen Of di-
minutive size;
By her side stood a damsel with eyes
like the dove,
No exquisite beauty but with heart
full of love.
Then outspoke the Fairy, in soft sill.
yer tone,
While aloft in her hand held a tiny
wish bone;
In this little bone, lies magic the
best,
Found meath the feather of Robin Red
Breat.
Take it fair maidens and wish it in
two,
And loi the best wish will surely
come true;
But secret I tell you and it springs
from above,
One surest to win, is the heart full of
love.
Then they playfully took the bone in
their hands,
And pulled till they parted the frail
slender strands;
Lo! the proud one was beaten, and
then she knew,
The magic that lit up those bright
eyes of blue.
BENZ. SIMONDS.
DoroIoa
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1918-10-24
NV Platform

The following is my platform:
For an early, general and democrat
ic peace.
Against militarism and imperialism
at home or abroad.
Against race hatred and mob rule.
For compelling the war profiteers to
pay the cost of the war.
For freedom of speech, press and
assemblage.
For freedom of conscience and for
religious liberty.
For Socialism, which will guarantee
to every man the full fruits of his la
Dor, thereby removing the main cause
of wars.
ARTHUR OCHSNER.
Plain, Wis.
Editors Note: Mr.. Ochsner resides
at Plain, is candidate for the assem-
bly, from this county and sends the
above platform to this department.
Some Of the planks should be an
swered, and perhaps a member of the
Sank County council of defense, a
member of the Liberty loan committee
or other person, will write a reply
This paper has answered the candi-
date in previous issues.
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1918-10-24

from the boys on their way to "Ber-
lin" Did you see a red Ford" with
a funny canvas top in Baraboo few
weeks ago? That was my friend,
Passmore, and wife, commercial
photographers from San Diego on
their trip to Detroit and back. Stacy
Jones of Tacoma, Wash, was here to
attend his fathers funeral. He and |
were in the same school room in Bar
aboo thirty years ago, and while here
I took him to see the teacher who
taught us at that time in the first
ward, Miss Alice Green, now Mrs.
Mendenhall, wife of DR.. Mendenhall.
GUY o. GLAZIER.
2143. Union ST.,
San Diego, Cal.
Editors Note:-In reply to the for
mer Baraboo resident will say we did
not see the California visitors. Per
sons from distant localities are al
ways welcome and will be glad to
show them the, sights here when pos
sible. When your visitors come again
Mr.. Glazier, have them call at the Of
fee The News is always glad to re-
ceive a few lines from the members
of it's family, such as the San Diago
resident has written.
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1918-10-24
Some Conundrums
BENZ. SIMONDS.
BarabOO.

What piece of furniture of no furth-
er use in Baraboo, but which cannot
be removed?
Answer: -Bar.
What foreigner in Baraboo who will
never become naturaliZed, nor leave
there?
Answer: Arab.
Why does not, the News" Office
fear a fuel shortage?
Answer: Because there is always
coal (Cole) to be had.
Why is the News" the biggest lit
tie paper IN the country?
Answer:-Becaus it only has one
Page, but has all the news in it.
N. G. ABBOTT.
Eureka Springs, Ark.
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1918-10-24
Busy Mr.. McAdoo

Poor Mr.. McAdoo-
Think of the jobs he's hitched up to
The treasury, the railroad crew,
The income tax, and then a few,
Each week they hand him something
new
To tax his time and temper, too;
He has to know when loans are due,
What source to get his billions
through,
What fund to pass each dollar to.
Which tax is what, and who is who;
What bonds to sell and what renew
Which "trust" to coax and which to
sue,
He stretches out each day or two,
To do the things he has to do;
The job would founder me or you
But it's a cinch for McAdoo!
Philadelphia Inquirer
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1918-10-24
From New York

we always look for the Baraboo
News on Saturday and always an
xious to read the letters from the
boys that are in field or camp Our
son Charles, is at Camp Jackson,
South Carolina. His address is Pvt
Charles A. Hormig, 18th Reg. Battery
d., F. A R. D., Camp Jackson, South
Carolina. He is we'll and likes it fine.
They have much sickness there at
present He is working temporary in
the hospital, nursing the sick He
wants his schoolmates and friends to
know he is doing his duty for the U.
5. We send him the paper every
week so it goes quite a distance Our
family is well and we have had good
crops this year and doing well.
MRS. E. +. HORMIG.
Collins, N. Y.
Editors NOte-The HOrmig family
resided for some time on Webster's
Prairie. The News is glad to hear
from the Hormigs and others who
write to the paper. 1t is an excellent
way to reach old friends and acquain-
Tances.
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1918-10-24
RI hotties spell tibet ever wuz


Wuz tibet the's jist passed by.
Wy, right UP yere in Punkinyille,
Hit caused no great surprise
Tibet railroad rails wuz melted down
An run betwixt tn ties.
Hit wuz so warm that any man
Who said, Gee! amt it hot?"
Wuz melted thar right in his butes,
An never left tn spot.
TIL hawgs, theh wuz just all tired auot
An all us folks cud find
Wus jist some bones an some grease
spots,
An hunks Nv bacon rind
TIL chickens feathers wuz singed OFF,
An so NV co'se theh died,
An when folks went ter hunt 'em up
Theh found 'em nicely fried.
An ever last hen aig wuz baked
Except them stored away,
An taters, tew, wuz roasted fine
Ez in tn groun' theh lay
TIL coaws all guy milk gravy,
An when twus time ter chew,
Folks jist went aout an holped EN-
selves
Thar wuz nawthin else ter do.
But Nv hot places in tn taown,
Tn hotties one, yo' bet!
Wuz tn editorial orfce
Wv the Punkinville Gazette.
That, at a stun top table
Smokin' towels roun' his head,
TIL editor we foun' settin' on
A cake NV ice, stun dead.
In candy pail Nv water
Wuz stuck his tew bare feet,
An thet water hit wuz bilin,
So fervent wuz tn heat.
TIL ink we'll, hit wuz BLOWN OFF
Like a biler un'ner steam
An all tn paper wuz burnt up
Exceptin' half ream.
His pen holder an lead pencil
He'd disappeared frum sight,
But up ter tn last minute
He wuz sho'ly boun' ter write.
An when we read his maunerscrip
This wuZ whut we foun' writ
Which showed that he had stayin
pOW6IS
An plenty NV pure grit.
at should be evident to all
That chance to come this way,
That Pumpkinyille, for comfort,
Is just the place to stay.
Today is simply perfect
Tho rather warm for some
But folks who don't like sunshine
Had ought to stay at home.
The doctors say tbs healthy
For people to perspire-"
The devil" finished out the verse
18th you're doggone liar"
N. G. ABBOTT.
Eureka Springs, Ark
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1918-10-24
Likes News Features

AS I cannot spare 1.-THE News" I
am sending three dollars. hoping
that will keep me on the firing line.
AS you already have the notice of H.
p. Jones DEATH and our friend, w. H.
AcFetridge, has sent you all the war
news of San Diego it doesn't leave
me much to write But want to say
Il do enjoy Mr.. Benz Simond's bird
and animal stories. Mrs. Dudley's
Coon stories, n. G. Abbott's South
-ern Foolishness, aad the war letters
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1918-10-24
The Magic Wish Bone

I wish, oh! l wish. said a bright maid
en- fair,
I had beautiful wings like the birds of
the air;
I'd soar over fields, DER ocean I'd
roam
Till l found bright island to make
me home.
Then I'd cluster around me all the
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1918-10-24
Near Saw MILLS

We can't get along without the Bar
aboo News. All of the Baraboo peo-
pie that live here are getting along
fine. We have very good crops this
fall. Four saw mills are running full
time within one mile of our place. Fir
ties are $21.00 per thousand feet.
G. E. JOHNSON.
Lebanon, Ore.
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1918-10-24
Very Anxious

We could not get along without oul
home paper, and are very anxious tt
receive our copy each week.
OTTO F. BBNSHAUSEN.
Netal, S. D.
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1918-10-24
Mans Opportunity in Illinois

Wanted-A man to debate with the
woman Of this city on the subject of
equal suffrage - Woman's Civic
League of Galesburg. = Galesburg
Register.
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1918-10-24
That Doggo1ae Linotype

Interest on the third Liberty loan
coupon bonds are now due. All who
have bonds deposited at the First Ma
tional bank are requested to call on
or bautU- reETAONISHRDLUC and
get their coupons.
n. G. ABBOTT.
Eureka Springs, Ark.
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1918-10-24

your brother claim the privilege of
lying under the sofa while you make
fools of the other fellows" = Boston
Transcript.
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1918-10-24
Sends Paper Across

/ could not get along without The
News. After l read it l send it across
10 Baraboo boy who is in France.
MRS. OTTO RAYMOND.
Kilbourn, Wis.
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1918-10-24
Very Thougl,tfuI

Won Hindenburg is having notches
cut in all of the linden trees east of
the Rhine so that they will be easy to
climb. remarks an exchange
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1918-10-24
Brothers Privilege

mo. Mr.. DobIey," said the sweet
girl. 81 can only be a sister to you"
sWell, then" he savagely replied,
as he heard a subdued chuckle, "as
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1918-10-24
Source of Endowment

l enjoy the News very much.
MRS. NJ. c.. STEUBER.
III N. Henry street,
Madison, Wis.
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1918-10-24
Collins. n. Y.
What 10 Do With the Kaiser

Herewith Chipping from the St. Paul
EQaily News of the 10 inst, which
ta'hunght might be Of interest to
=" News readers.
Some time ago some one wrote in
this column in very strong language,
as to what disposition should be made
of the kaiser when we have captured
him and various suggestions had
since been made Here is one that
should appeal to Baraboo residents,
hence | am forwarding it to you.
Personal regards and best wishes
from a former resident of good old
O. QUALE.
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1918-10-24

Inclosed please find money for The
News which we enjoy very much.
HOWARD MORLEY.
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1918-10-24

Editors Note-In reply will say the
price Of the Weekly News has not
been increased.
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1918-10-24
The Rhyme of the PunkinviIIias,

The rhyme of the punkinvillian
In speakin' Nv bot weather spells
[ sez-an' faint no lie
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1918-10-24
Joy for This Reader

[ would feel that I had lost a frien'
If did not have the News every weel
TO read.
MRS. |. j. LATTIMER
Delton, Wis.
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1918-10-24
Ollapodrida
DEPARTMENT nEyorED TO INTERESTS OF NEWS READERS

ysu something tfney question d
ssk. IL 70 ths department. Limit all corr
n,unicatons 300 lsss.
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1918-10-24
Hudson, Wis.
For Ringline's sideshow

Editor Daily News: I suggest that
you put the kaiser in strong cage
and sell him to Ringing brothers for
80 cents and let them exhibit him
with the other beasts throughout the
United States. Let the money collect
ed thus be sent to help restore Bel
gium. 1 think the daily humiliation
he would be subjected to would be far
worse than any physica, in.
1t would give him a chance to see
the country he thought beneath his
notice and also give up a chance to
see and laugh at his discontinue. At
ter his tour of America take him to
Belgium and set him at manual labor
along with the rest who are trying to
repair the damages he has done.
e. J. ATKINSON
Dundas, Mimi
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1918-10-24
No Raise in Price

If the Baraboo Weekly News has
raised would be glad to know and will
send what ever it is.
ALBERT KUTZ.
Reedsburg, Wis.
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1918-10-24
Letters Worth the Price

We could not get along without the
paper. The letters from the boys
across is worth the price of the paper
alone
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1918-10-24

you give IN your repIy. agree with
you perfectly about the war, that Is
that Germany or no other nation
should be allowed to do cruel things
as have happened in the past. But
why is 1t that the News does not
know anything about the cruel things
that happen here? Have not cruel
things been going on in the township
Of Honey Greek for the last 10 years?
Such as the News states that if they
did not happen. How does it come
that the News knows everything that
happens in Europe and does not know
what happens close by? In my first
letter thought the News would know
that my property has been destroyed
and damage done in every other way
wherever it was possible to me and
others around here The News Is
right when it says there are men
without souls everywhere, but why do
you give any account of what should
be done with them? Do you think a
mob ought to take care of such peo-
pie? do not think that mob should
be allowed to do anything in civil
lied nation. | have more than
enough trouble of my own and got
no time to read much about the war
and SO will not say anything about
the war only to answer your ques-
tions. | have given the answers as
good as | am able to explain. Hope
you will under stand aow how
mean it.
Yours,
GEORGE MELLENTIN
Honey Creek,
Prairie du Sac.
Editors Note: In reply to Mr.. Mel
lentine will say we were not aware
that trouble had come to him or his
relatives. The district attorney is
working on the case and the whole af-
fair may be aired in court. AS before
stated it is difficult for a newspaper
to print criminal matters before a
court record has been made. Will be
glad to print full account if Mr.. Mel
lentine or other persons will furnish
the particulars. When a crime has
been committed the criminal should
be made to suffer, it makes no differ
ence if in this country or across the
sea. All law loving citizens will be
glad to here Mr.. Mellentine's enemies
have been punished in case the au-
thorities are able to run them to
earth.
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1918-10-24
DAVID MORTIMER

Wonewoc, Wis.
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1918-10-24

Reedsburg, Wis.
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1918-10-24

In the long ago | as a boy read
in Sanders school reader number 3
a poem about Alexander the Great
a dialogue:
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1918-10-24

Eureka Springs, Ark.
The independent-reporter. [volume] (Skowhegan, Me.) 1909-1955, 1918-06-20
To Study Machine Gunnery

Among the members of the A. f. F.
who passed the week end in town was
Edward n. Snow, son Of the late Benz.
X. Snow. This young man was a
graduate of the Skowhegan High
School in 1906 and of the University
of Maine, where he had been taking
the electrical engineering course, in
1910 After his graduation, he was,
for time, with the Western Electric
Co at Chicago, and later with the
Northern Electric Co in Montreal,
specializing in telephone sales engin-
eering He was mustered in in May,
1915, and went Immediately to the Of
ficers' training school at Camp Dew
ems. Recently, there was call
placed before this school for volun-
teers to study machine gunnery. Mr..
Snow is one of 1872 who have volun-
teered under this call and left here
Monday, to go to Camp Hancock In
Georgia, to study the use of this wea-
pom This Georgia camp is the prin-
cipal school for machine gunnery in
struction in America. Arthur Mer-
riam of this place has been studying
at this camp. for the month past
Other men from the service who were
in town over Sunday were Philip Bur
rill, who recently enlisted in the U. s
Navy. and Frank Huckins from Camp
Deyens.