The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1918-05-06
Second Husbands and Wives
Don't Expect Too Much of
the Other and Are More
ConSiderate, Woman Writer
Declares,
BY DOROTHY DIX,

| anu ldll'l lUDU'N, anu 'llllluB ludA
people Of their age should have their
thoughts fixed on their heavenly homes
instead Of on bridal trips
Stuff and nonsense! Why shouldn't
old people Lct married il they want TO /?
Surely II there is an body on earth who
needs a good home and a loving wife
or a tender husband, it is the man and
woman who have gotten to the place
where there is no other spot so at
tractvc as their own fircSide, and when
they are too old and stiff and rhcu-
matte to desire to run around and play
and hunt up outside playiellows.
Luxury for Young.
DomeSticity is a luxury for the young
| II is a necessity for the old and a
lonely, middle aged man and woman
never do a more sensible thing than
when they hunt up a suitable Joan and
Darby to bear them company on the
last lap of the journey of life.
1t is the custom OF the young 10 sneer
at such marriages, and the fear of max
ing themselves ridiculous, particularly
in their children's eyes, keeps many
man and woman from making a second
marriage and establishing second
home in which they would find nothing
but peace, comfort and happiness.
Laughable to Youth.
To the young the spectacle of a gray
haired couple, who have to favor their
left knee a little as they go upstairs
iancying themselves in love is matter
for rlbald laughter, because, in the mind
of youth love and marriage are indis-
sslubly linked with golden tresses,
peaches and cream Complexions, and ro-
nance and thrills. Possibly youth is
right. and after one has fought the bat
tie OF existence for fifty odd years, one
does no longer have hectic ievers at the
mere thought OF some particular in
divdual, or palpitate at the sound of a
certain football
PUT II the middle age cannot love
- with the glamor OF youth, it is ca
pablc Of passion that is an adequate |
consolation prize, 1t is capable OF |
deep, compcnsating and satisfying
friendship. and there is no surer founda- |
ton on which TO build matrimonial hap
pness than this. Indeed, it is all that
even the most romantic marriage has
IN it by the time il reaches middle age
for long before that time sentiment has
been torn TO tatters and the attraction
Of the senses has worn itself away, and
husband and wife have become either
comrades and chumS, or else they are
strangers, or enemies.
Happier Than First Marriages.
In spite OF what cynical Doctor John.
son says about second marriages being
the triumph OF hope over experience,
they are generally far happier than first
marriages There are many reasons
why this should be the case The first
is that people who marry a second time
have generally learned some wisdom
from the mistakes they made in their
first marriage, and use more common
sense in picking out their No ? mates
than they did in choosing No |.
Another reason why second marriages
are generally successful is because both
men and women are house broken to
domeSticlty A boy and girl enter into
the holy estate under the deIusion thar
they have espouSed impeccable saints
and angels not mere mortals,
Then Comes Disillusionment.
The man expects his bride to|
always look radiantly beautiful al
ways to be exquisitely dressed, and for
her always TO agree with him perfectly
on every question, and to be willing to
do just what he wants TO do. The wom-
,p ,vCcrts bn, Ivrk,,J ., l.. n ro,,
blnalion plaster saint and matinee hero,
and when they see each other in ncgligec
of dress and manners, and run .p
against the sharp edges OF each other
temper and scliishness. they suffer
agonies ~ disllluSionment and quarrel
like Kilkenny cats
THE man and woman who have had
a previous matrimonial experience
do not expect too much Of each other
and do not demand too much of each
other They know how to make allow
ances for nerves and temperament, antt
IN a subconscious way they try 10 atone
for the way they treated No by treat
ing No ? with extra tenderness and
consideration
Why Preferred Risks.
Second wives and husbands reap the
fruits OF many bitter tear of repent
ance that a man and woman shed over
still coffined form, and that's why
widows and wdowers are a preferred
matrimonial risk.
The chief reason, however, why sec
ond marriages are advisable--always
provided a man and woman marry in
their own age class-is because as
people get older they more and more
need the companonshp of someone
who belongs TO them. Old people do pot
readily make new friends They do not
attract strangers as do the Young and
gay They are thrown in on those OF
their own household for society.
Children Not Always HospitsbIe.
OF course the children virtuously pat
themselves on their breasts and say
mother or father can always live with
us, and we will take care of her or
him, and cherish his or her old age
AVERY kind in children, but the trouble
~ IS that mother or father doesn't
enjoy being put up on shelf in sons
or daughters house, and exhibited as
an antique Neither mother or father
in these days want TO be stuck off in
the chimney corner and expected 10 stay
put. Little as children suspect Il,