davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1918-12-06
Make the World Safe for Smokers

T CANNOT telephone comfortably
l. Unless I am smoking
And usually when the operator keeps me
waiting,
My pipe goes out.
Then what a problem
I transfer the receiver to my right hand
While 1 eXcavate my matches from my left
trouser pocket;
Then, by little legerdemain, I get out o
match
And shift the receiver back to my left
hand
But how to light the match?
I used to balance the box on my right ear
And strike a light with my right hand,
But I singed my ear-drum;
So now I insert the matchbox
Between my first and third waistcoat but.
tons
after unbuttoning the second button)
And lean slanting against the wall
SO that the sparks will fall on the floor
Instead of on my breeks.
Just as have got light
The operator connects me with my party
And have to unmouth my pipe In a hurry
So l can answer.
In my nervousness, generally put
The red-hot match in my ear,
The lighted pipe in my pocket,
And the receiver In my mouth.
Just then I notice the telephone company's
little placard:
The poice 1Uith the smile 1oins!
I wish had third arm,
An arm of maneuver.
SOCRATES
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1918-12-06
Mrs. Santa Claus
,T1WILL doubtless interest you to hear
L q do not speak to grown-ups-No, sir !!
But just to kids) that Christmas cheer

eET1WlLL doubtless interest you TO near
l. q do not speak to grown-ups-No. sir
But just to kids) that Christmas cheer
Is actually coming closer!
/ know this is fact because
I've met dear Mrs. Santa Claus.
I hadn't seen her since way back
(Before the war the world was shooking)
She used to fiji her husbands pack
And pack him off to fill your stocking
With candy, fruit and alley taws-
Fresh picked by Mrs. Santa Claus"
But have heard from her-Oh, yes!--
In Red Cross circulars and letters.
The dear old soul in times of stress
Was busy knitting socks and sweaterU;
Still hustng without let or pause,
A kindly Mrs. Santa Claus.
Said she, "The work was right at hand;
And clearly it was prov'dential,
Since war had made us understand
That Santa's work was nonessential
BY strict construction of the laws
She smiled, did Mrs. Santa Claus.
"Of course. our little girls and boys
Were not forgotten or neglected;
And certain dolls and other toys
From polar hooks were resurrected.
But this year VIII be free from flaws 7"
Said kindly Mrs. Santa Claus.
Despite her years, light were her feet,
And all her movements grly-whirly.
She warbled as she crossed the street,
"I'll do my Christmas shopping earlyf'
'Tis so she'll win our loud applause.
God bless dear Mrs. Santa Clausi
GRIF ALEXANDER.
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1918-12-06
On the Return of Book Lent to q Friend

I give humble and hearty thanks for the
safe return Of this book, which, having
endured the peris of my friends bookcase,
and the bookcase Of my friends friends, now
returns to me in reasonably good condition.
l give humble and hearty thanks that my
infant as plaything, nor use 1t as an ash
tray for his burning cigar, nor as teeth!nS
ring for his mastiff.
When lent this book deemed It as lost
I was resigned to the bitterness of the Ions
parting l never thought to look upon its
pages again.
But now that my book is CONF, back to mo.
I rejoice and am exceeding glad! Bring
hther the fatted morocco and let us rebino
the volume and set 1t on the shelf Of honor:
for this my book was lent, and is returned
again.
Presently. therefore. may return some or
the books that myself have borrowed-Life.
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1918-12-06

THE reason for the nomination to diplo.
= matte posts in the early days Of the
republic of men who later became Presi.
dent Is to be found in the fact that we
were governed for years by q close cor
poration, the members of which parceled
out the offices among themselves This
may be an extreme way of stating the
case, but it is approximately correct The
Presidents nowadays are nominated in con-
ventions composed Of delegates from all
the States. Martin Van Buren, vas the
first President to be nominated wholly by
the convention system. Washing on was
the unanimous choice Of the country and
he was elected without any formal nomina-
tion. Thereafter the candidates were
named in Washington. None of the States
suggested their favorite sons, but the men
running the Government picked from
among themselves the presidential candi-
dates. There was candidate of the Ad-
ministration, selected after consultation
among themselves by the men who con-
trolled the Administration. The minority
party In Congress got together and made
an opposition nomination and chose a man
more or less active in the national Govern
ment. Thus we find in the presidency, the
vice presidency the office Of Secretary Of
State and in the diplomatic service a small
group Of names the holders of which one
after another were promoted to the presl-
dency. Jefferson. Madison, Monroe, John
Quincy Adams, Martin Van Buren, and Bu-
chanan each served as Secretary of State
and each held diplomatic office. 1t was
not until the election Of Jackson that the
hold on the political affairs Of the country
by the men who had been The leaders in
| creating the Government was broker and
new order was instituted. And when
Jackson introduced the convention system
In order to secure the nom nation of Van
Buren, the hold of the Washington clque
on the political machinery E" the country
was broken.
Since then we have elected Grant and
Cleveland and Roosevelt and Wilson to
tho presidency when they had had no
| previous training in national affairs. In
less than three years Cleveland was lifted
! from the office of Mayor of Buffalo into
the White House, a thing which could not
have happened in 1920, because then no
| one outside of Buffalo would have known
anything ABOUT Cleveland and his cam
paign for municipal honesty and efficiency
1t was necessary in the beginning to select
| for the presidency men whom those in
Washington knew had some knowledge of
the national affairs. And the work of
forming the Government had developed
group Of such men Of great ability whom
It, was most natural to call upon for carry
Ing out the work which they had begun.
MIR, WILSON has reversed the old prece-
A'A dents by engaging in diplomatic work
while he holds the office of President, In.
stead of rising from diplomatic post to
the presidency. 1t is as near as he could
come to restoring the earlier practices,
which he began by going to Congress to
deliver his annual address after the man.
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1918-12-06

The earthquake just
Seismic Intelligence reported from Ataca-
ma, Chile. seems to
have had dramatic feeling for situation"
since that province is one OF those annexed
after the war against Peru and Bolivia,
echoes of which are still disturbing the in
ternatlonal situation in South America.
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1918-12-06

The Allies are said
Diplomatic Mysteries to be disposed to re-
gard Herr Hohenzol-
lern as a pirate or slave trader" without
rights of sanctuary in any country. Now,
why shouldn't they have said pirate and
slave trader?
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1918-12-06

It seems too bad the ex-Crown Prince
didn't set UP as an armchair war expert while
hostilities were on. Judging by the latest
interview with his ex-Highness his grasp Of
hindsight is something stupendous.
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1918-12-06

The news that the ALLIES have now tho
whole Turkish feet" probably literally
means that they have got the elusive Goeben.
which was only an Indian gift from the Ger
mans, anyway
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1918-12-06
SOCRATES.

The reports Of ex-Kaiser, writing
hour after hour" Suggests that maybe he's
about to syndicate himself But in that case
the reliability of the "Hohenzollerp Service"
would be more than questionable.
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1918-12-06

When you recall the name OF the ship
the President sailed on 1t becomes necessary
to admit that a great deal of the clamor in
the Senate seems unjustihed. Mr.. Wilson is
not far from Washington.
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1918-12-06
Mr.. schwab is willing to cooperate

Mr.. schwab Is willing to cooperate with
Philadelphia in the development OF the port
II Philadelphia will cooperate with him. But
how are we to do 1t when Some of our port
boomers persist in diverting to New York all
the business over which they have any con-
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1918-12-06
What Do You Kno,v?
QUIZ

QUIZ"
l. whG dessnsd the Statue of Liberty in New
g. What . stsa%shIp @ company formerly owned TIE
sesEs fsesd.nt s EI which Is carrying the
each each T%esP9ssctivslyo Re 9su gave to the American
4. What color Is sometimes called raddIe?
"sine die" and how is 1t appileds
9. What Is bsrratry?
Z. What IL the largest ely In Italy?
8. Who was N. =. wills:
0. What celebrated English admiral was known
Ss,,,ds as %eld Gros." and why was he 90
saptnrsd. .Aruinaido. the Philippine revolt.
Answers to Yesterdays Quiz
1. Doctor Garfield resions as Federal fuel admin.
OF Williams College. 40 "''''''n'
g. Gretns Green is a village in Scotland, for.
riages. many RUNWAY mar
s. The volcano Of OrIzaba. after which the ye.-
sci taking the American correspondents e
Europe Is named. Is In Mexico.
4. FIotow wrote the opera Of "Martha."
8. NJ. Cail,aux Is awaiting q treason trial 1.
g. GeGEEs W"shinston called the AmsrIeAa
effective policy Of delay. -
T. Goleonndai place Of treasure. IN eIlgsion to
Tma, Tai diamond mines once worked there In
8. Kitt. Give, nee Raftor, was m .s,shr.,.s
ggssttress gst1fs.sf q Irish extraction. Her dates are
"cFs.s ws@s osb,s slgsqsSs p ES. p.ss.. write.
the Roman Empire anu r".i of
though SPELLED "noo.b " pfo''unesa a.
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1918-12-06

The report from the George Washington
that "the sea is calm suggests that the Pres
ident may admit the possibility of compensa-
ton In all situations.
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1918-12-06

Those who doubt the
Quite True value of the services
rendered by the ad-
illustrators of the Governments emergency
departments during our period in the war
and there are few persons who seem to
believe that they were chiefly ornamental
might gain enlightenment If Hoover should
suddenly decide to Join the resigners.
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1918-12-06
0n1ens

The Berlin Govern
omens ment, as we go to
press, Is Red. The
mer Kaiser is extremely blue. And yet,
strange as 1t may seem, this doesn't mean
that Germany Is democratic.
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1918-12-06

Man." the boche arstocrats used to
say. begins with the baron" They neglected
to say that the progressive development was
downward
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1918-12-06

The President broke precedent by sailing
for Europe. and the next day 1t snowed-in
Germantown.
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1918-12-06

The sugar bowl is back on the restaurant
table and this, to most people, is a surer sign
of peace than the surrender OF the German
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1918-12-06

Somebody ought to stage peace confer
ence in the Senate.
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1918-12-06

IL Is not TO be assumed that tt Is sheer
nobility Of heart that prompts the tooao-
contst to 9tve a,cay little paper folders Of
matches.
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1918-12-06

>TENERAL GRANT as every one knows,
~ made a tour Of the world after he left
the White House. and was welcomed and
feted as the greatest military commander
Of his generation, measuring greatness by
success. And Colonel Roosevelt, unique
among Presidents, went to Africa to hunt
big game in order to get relaxation after
seven arduous years in Washington. When
he had got his fill Of killing animals he
returned home by way Of the European
capitals He called on the Kaiser in Bsr-
lin and the Kaiser ordered a review of his
troops in the Colonels honor. The Colonel,
il will be recalled, told his host that If he
had such an army he could conquer the
world. And 1t will be recalled also that
some years later the Kaiser made the at
tempt to conquer the world, with the re-
suit that he is now In exile at Amerongen'
awaiting with such calmness as he can
muster the decision Of the world as to his
fate. The Colonel also visited Paris and
London and made an address at oxford
University, received various honors and
came home
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1918-12-06

solution, according to strategists, tri-
umphantly proved right, would deci-
sively crush the German power. Some
Of its value was, Of course, dependent
on the success then obviously assured
of the heroic French and British eff
forts to the north. But at any time
the destruction Of the Kriemhild line,
the passage through the difficult Argonne
and the possession of the railway along
the Meuse would have been an appalling
blow to Germany.
With Marshal Fochs victories magnif-
Gently co-ordinated, the stroke was con-
elusive. When the armistice was signed
the two great armies under Billiard and
Liggett, respectively, had in consider
ably less than two months swept for
ward against the flower Of the German
army and against its most powerful
artillery a distance of twenty-five miles
through natural positions Of great
strength and often amid weather wholly
unfavorable to the conduct of an advance.
When operations ceased third Ameri
can army had been formed, more than
100000 Americans had seen fighting and
there were more than 100000 men
under our flag in France. Pride in the
whole achievement has no relation to
vanity nor need one be chary of it in
considering the still vaster sacrifices
made by our allies over much longer
period.
In the sober pages of General Persh-
ing's report these facts are evident:
That the American army throughout
the rdr nerer lost battle.
That from the time Of ats entrance it
1Uent continuously forlCard.
That il 7Uon a campaign 1Uhich shared
only aUith one or ttUo others the honor
of decisireness.
These truths impcrishably speak for
themselves in the soldierly commentary
of the victorious American commander
in-chief.
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1918-12-06

T,HON1AS JEFFERSON. James Monroe,
L John Quincy Adams, Martin Van Buren
and James Buchanan served tier country
abroad for many years before they were
elected to the presidency. They gained
knowledge and experience which served
them well when they entered the Whlte,
House.
Jefferson represented the Confederation
In Paris while the nation was being or
ganized long before he was elected to the
presidency Washington had three minis
ters to Paris. The first was Gouverneur
Norris. He was succeeded In 17S4 py
James Monroe, who remained In France
for two years. Monroe was sent to Great
Britain as our minister by JeHerson IN
1903 where he served alone until ne was
toined by James Pinckney in 1906, and the
two remained In London until 1871. John
Quincy Adams was our first minister to
Russia, sent there by Madison In 1903. He
remained In st. Petersburg until he was
transferred to London by Madison in 1915.
He returned to America IL 1917 after a
residence abroad of eight years. Andrew
Jackson sent abroad two men who later
Van Buren,, who served as minister to
Great Britain for about l. year from 1881
to 1882, and the second was James Blu
chanan, who went to St. Petersburg In
1882 and came home in 1888. President
Pierce. when looking for a man to repre-
sent the country in Great Britain, followed
Jackson's example and sent Buchanan
abroad once more. Buchanan remained In
London about twice as long as he served
in st. Petersburg.
Buchanan was the last man to become
President who ever held diplomatic post
of any kind, If we except Mr.. Taft Mr..
Taft was Governor of the Philippines before
he was elected as Colonel Roosevelt's sue
cessor. and he entered into negotiations
with the Vatican for the disposal of the
friars' lands. stopping in Rome for the
purpose on his way to his post. But this
service hardly ranks with that of the men
who were formally commissioned as the
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1918-12-06
OUR VITAL SHARE IN THE
TRIUMPH OF FREEDOM
Superb and Decisive Accomplishment Of
the American Army Revealed in Gen.
Pershing's Soldierly Report

1--WE had cut the cnemy's main line Of
Communications and nothing but sur
render or an d1mistice could SGve his
army from complete disaster"
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1918-12-06

The Transit Company seems to believe In
"signecures."
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1918-12-06

ALTHOUGH Mr.. Wilson Is tho first
"A American President to go abroad on a
diplomatic mission during his term of
office, and, SO far as the easily accessible
records indicate, the third man holding
the office to go abroad after he had been
elected, five Of his predecessors served
their country as minister in one or another
of the European capitals before they be-
came President.
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1918-12-06

A German paper says that the Kaiser
has fallen from the sublime to the ridcu-
lous.
We doubt whether he has fallen as far
as that. He never reached the sublime.
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1918-12-06

We are stHl a little nervous tchen he see
sugar botcl on the table and haze a
Sneaking fear that one OF Mr. Hoopers
agents nay be lurking Some,ohere about.
Perhaps IT'S q trick!
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1918-12-06

We were much interested to note the
other day that Mr., Hughes said in a
speech that one must not assume tina,
big business is bad business.
The most cathartic thinker of our time,
George Bernard Shaw, has put the matter
excellently well
Trusts are most ercellcnt things as
superior to competitive shopkeeperism as
symphonies are to cornet solos; but they
need more careful scoring and longer re.
hearsals and better conducting.
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1918-12-06
PRESIDENTS AS DLPLOMA7TSTS

envoy extraordinary and minister pleni-
potentiary to France, Great Britain or
Russia.
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1918-12-06

THE former Emperor sits at that win
dow" said an observer at Amerongen,
writing as though against time, hour
after hour, sheet after sheet"
And also, we fear, writing against Truth,
fb after fib.
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1918-12-06

WITH wonders tired he takes his ease
w At dusk. upon his mothers knees:
A little laugh. little cry,
Put toys to bed, then ''seepy-bye"-
The world is made Of such as these
At two years old.
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1918-12-06

At TWO years old the world he sees
Unjust seem expressly made to please!
Such new.found words and games to try,
Such sudden mirth, he knows not why.
So many curiosities!
AS LIFE about him, by degrees
IADiscloses all its pageantries
He watches with approval shy
At two years old.
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1918-12-06

A friend OF ours has recently been blessed
putting on heirs he was quite annoyed.
The watchman and southron. [volume] (Sumter, S.C.) 1881-1930, 1918-03-27
What Is the Matter?

study of the total and per capita
sales of War Savings Stamps for the
different States TO the end of February
must fill South CarOlinians with q
feeling the very reverse of pride; for
the Palmetto State, be it said, to our
reproach. tails the list. In total sales
every other State of the Union is far
ahead of us with the exception Of lit
tie Nevada. and Nevada's per capita
sales are nearly eight times as large
as ours
The trouble here can hardly be
blamed on our large negro population,
for Mississippi, which also has n negro
majority, is considerably ahead of our
record. North Carolina and n number
OF other Southern States have done
more than twice as well us we have.
In Louisiana the children of the pub
lie schools have bought and sold $3I2,-
600 worth of stamps rs against only
$19O,S69.20 for all the people of South
Carolina. One school i'm Louisiana,
with four teachers and only one hun
dred and fifty children. has bought
and sold $4,000 worth Of stamps. The
state superintendent Of Public Educa-
tiOn in Louisiana, Mr. Thomas ii. Iiar-
ris, estimates that "if every school in
the country had done rs well the total
would have amounted to $5,OOO,OOO,
600"
What is wrong in South Carolina
That there has nos boon thus far a
better response to this sound and pa
icr.
The watchman and southron. [volume] (Sumter, S.C.) 1881-1930, 1918-03-27
LIST YOUR FARM LANDS NOV.

Indications lands this
fall Those
oh opportunity to sell The
position satisfy
them better
purchase money
able farming conditions expeen come in
periods
From the standpoint
to
by experience such the standpoint of
able o the
farm
which products
enabling o
flu OF
of
the
in
al leas this
in showing
lands which to lis
suitable advertising
prospective buyer
will him the choice
ber special
position than
handle the
sell o take up with
The watchman and southron. [volume] (Sumter, S.C.) 1881-1930, 1918-03-27
Rcmbert Poultry Club.

The Rembert Poultry Club had II
meeting today ut the school house.
Samuel Young was elected president.
II j. Brown vice president and Harral
Young secretary. Miss Keels told us,
how TO make hen nest and how To
test eggs. Each member gave a re-.
port OF the work he has done. Our
agent showed us homemade egg
tester. IL was made out OF shoe
box and an ordinary hand lamp. Very
few OF the members have set their
hens. We wish to see them set their
hens right away as we want to hatch
OF the chickens before May. We
wish the parents would help the chill
dren to get the eggs. Each first year
member has to set three hens. One of
these hens must be set on pure bred
eggs. Rhode Island Reds. Plymouth
Rocks. Orpingtons Or Wyandotts are
the best breeds for poultry club mem
bers to raise. The club will meet
again next month.
Harral Young. Secty.
The watchman and southron. [volume] (Sumter, S.C.) 1881-1930, 1918-03-27
Home Demonstration Work
ANNIE keElS, Dsmunsirator
ALICE MARTIN, Assistant

The Dalzell Home Demonstration
Club held Its regular monthly meeting
at the school house on Thursday.
March ei. o'clock.
The following program was carried
out:
1. Song; March winds--By ~
OF the school girls.
q. Reading: Billy at the Poultry
show--By Miss Sadie Scarborough.
Q. The Hen--By Miss Rosalie
Rembert.
4. Talk on Poultry and Demon
stration of Preserving Eggs i'm Water
glass by Miss Keels. Home Demon
stration Agent.
The club will meet again i'm April,
on Thursday before 4th Sunday. at I
y. NJ.