The Lakeland evening telegram. (Lakeland, Fla.) 1911-1922, 1918-01-26

PIace. Berlin, the halSerS Library
in the Palace.
Dramatis Personnel: The Devil
and the Kaiser.
(By Noble Smithson.)
The Devil dressed as a German
Field Marshal, with brilliant sword;
the Kaiser dressed, negligee; seated
at his favorite table reading Ma
chiavelli. Enter the Devil through a
side door.
! Kaiser (rising): Hail to the Chief!
God Of War and He'll. I am delight
ed to see you here tonight!
Devil: All hail to you; my COM
panion and partner; the god of war
and hell on earth; all honor and
glory to you! With delight l greet
you!
lThey take seats on opposite sides
of tie table,
Compliments
! Kaiser: fear your Satanic ma
jeSty flatters me. 1t is true that
do all of your work that I can; but
l cannot do all that I wish to do
i abominate the Americans, English,
French and italians; I would shout
for joy, if l could see every one of
them broiling in your hottest flames,
l would like to see my beloved cous-
in. the degenerate king of England,
In the hottest hole, damn him,
Devil: My dear Kaiser, these are
noble sentiments, worthy of your
majesty. I have no doubt you speak
truly. I have watched your conduct
of the war; and l am sure that your
deeds tally with your words. But
really there are no words which can
describe the hell that you have made
on the earth! I am delighted at your
work! 1T is good, vast, glorious, Uni
vGrsal!
They Hank Back
am in reminiscent mood to-
night. Let us bark back and see how
long l have known you and how our
acquaintance wears.
Kaiser You remember when I was
appointed Second lieutenant of the
guard" | was ten years of age. You
took liking to me; and we haG
many interviews. You told me that
you had been the companion and ad
| wiser of Alexander the Great, Of
| Fianibal, Caesar and Napoleon; thai
! you had actually conducted the cam
| paign Of Attilla, the Hun; also tina
! Of Zingis Khan!
Devil: | remember that told vol
all these things and much more
What advice did give you?
Devils Advice
Kaiser: You told me to lie to ev
erybody about everything; that
should never tell the truth if l coult
avoid it. You told me not to trus
anyone, not even my father no
my mother; to hate everyone; to de
stroy, to rob and kill everybody an,
everything that was in my way
that the law, civilization, patriot
ISM humanity, friendship and low
were creatures of the Imagination
mere myths. You told me that yo,
would cause me to become empero
OF the whole earth, if / would fol
low your advice and live up to you
plans; and l faithfully promised vol
that l would do so. l have performe,
nv part of the pact, to the best 0
my skill and ability.
| Devil: Your memory is good.
II Kaiser Tells of His Own Work
| Devil: I have heard much o
crimes and atrocities committed b
you and your men. What do you sa
: on this point?
Kaiser: l have ordered my officer
and men to destroy the house.
buildings, roads, farms and all othe
improvements of my enemies. | hay
ordered them to do everything tina
will distress, worry or weaken m
enemies. | have ordered them to 70
my enemies of everything that yo
] can take away and use; and to burr
blow up and destroy what we can
not take away; | have ordered m
ofltcers and men to kill the wome
and children of the enemy; hav
ordered them to kill doctors, nurse.
) prisoners, patients, all; to bomb hos
pitals; to make a clean sweep: an
"leave no trace!"
1 Devil Hates Human Race
\ Devil: / hate the human rae
Every man, woman and child hate
me. reciprocate their hatred
never 10se an onnortup;tv - H.,