davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1918-04-18

O Hcazens vyercsmAn
But-ccnStznt. hewere perfect; That
HHnperuF
FfnShiux with fanfts.
-Twer~Gentlemen Of Verona.
q 4 q
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1918-04-18
UP 70 FATHER.

UP TO FATHER.
my daughter has been accustomed to
every luxury"
"I understand that. sir. And l was
er-just wondering"
about what?"
Whether or not you would have the
heart to deprive her of all those lux
uries after we are married.
RIMES OF THE TIMES.
Each time ship
Glides to the sea,
We've struck a blow
For Liberty.
Birmingham Age-Herald.
And every time
We gait Hun,
You bet we've struck
Another one.
Macon Telegraph.
And every time
We spare a spy,
We let chance
To strike pass by.
Memphis Commercial Appeal.
And every time
We buy a bond
We save a Sammy
Ger the pond.
Youngstown Telegram
And every time
We buy a Stamp,
We paste the Kaiser
IN the lamp.
Cleveland Plain Dealer.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1918-04-18
Likes Lady BARRIERS

II had one of the funniest expe-
riences of my life the other day." SAID
Arnold Masberg, the popular druggist.
"a man who has spent many years
in drug store is asked about many
things. The other day a fellow came
in and said: Doc, have you got
good hair restorer? I admitted that
had but looking at his head / saw
that he had the thickest glossest and
best cared for hair that I ever saw
adorn a male His face was fresh
shaved and he looked perfectly
groomed. My curiosity being aroused
asked him. What do you want with
hair restorer?'
"Well, it's this way, Doc. I dropped
i'll to get a shave at the shop nearby
your place of business and it was the
first time / had ever had a lady barber
shave me. and she gave me such
delightful shave that I want TO get
shaved again, but haven't the nerve
to go back until tomorrow morning,
and / thought maybe you had some
tonic that 1 could rub on my face that
would bring out sufficient "fuz" to
give me an excuse for getting a shave
in the morning and the afternoon
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1918-04-18


."Since my student days at Howard
I have been living in Tennessee whore
| did some special work in one or
the Baptist schools up there and later
accepted the pastorate of the Baptist
church at Jackson. in the same state"
said the Rev. Emory Berkstresser, who
was passing through the city en- route
to Talladega to visit his father. who
is i'll.
81 can't get over my love for the
Magic City. think Birmingham is a
fine town tor schools. 1 think it for
tunate that both the Baptists and
the Methodists have such splendid
colleges within it's borders. 1 was
greatly interested in the campaign
for the Howard endowment fund, as
am in the one just starting for the
Birmingham college,
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1918-04-18

washington bureau, 2o7 Hibbs build
ing.
European bureau, Henrietta street,
Coyent Garden, London
Eastern business office, Room AZ to
so. inclusive, Tribune building, New
York city; western business office,
Tribune building, Chicago. The S c.
Beckwith Special Agency, agents for
foreign advertising.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1918-04-18

Member of the Associated Press
The Age-Herald is the only morning
and Sunday newspaper in Birmingham
carrying the Associated Press dis
patches.
The Associated Press is exclusively
entitled to the use for publication
of all news dispatches credited to 1t
or not otherwise credited in this paper
and also the local news published
herein
AL rights disqualification OF spe-
rial dispatches herein are also re-
served
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1918-04-18

I have seen the national games OF
many countries, but there is none so
democratic as is baseball, none in which
the spirit of country is so incarnated,
and I have faith that people who be-
lieye in such clean and manly form
of amusement will be sports enough to
stay in the game until they win.
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1918-10-26
READERS VIEWPOINT.
The Sacrilsse Of Closins


To the Editor Of the Erening Public Ledger:
sir-"And David built there an altar unto
the Lord and offered burnt offerings and
peace offerings. the Lord was entreated
for the land, and the plague was stayed from
Israel."-H Samuel, xiv, 25.
The State Commissioner Of Health inhibits
any semblance Of the above action. He arro-
gates to himself the prerogative Of infallible
censor against the ordinance Of Almighty
God
First. Th:s'is sacrilese; 1t is also against
public policy, for it means serious loss
to the people of moral and spiritual convic-
tion In the promises Of God.
Second. 1t is a fearful thing in time of
trial and affliction TO deprive the people OF
the needed support and reliance upon the
church's ordinance.
Third. The danger from the opening OF
the church, II 1t exists at all. IL irhnitesiral
In comparison with that which results from
keeping open public offices, where accon,n1o-
daton IL small and hours are long. and yet
these cannot be cloeed.
Fourth. II to close Government and other
departments of business would be out Of the
question. it 10 equally contrary to public
policy to close the church and thereby silence
Gods witness, which speaks for Him And
His people in city and country
Fifth. General Pershing sent this mes
sage: I'VE rely on the churches at home to
keep the spirit of the people white-hot with
patriotism and courage until victory has been
Won"
The man that cut on the limb he was sit
ting on came to grief: IL this the accom-
plishment which tho State Health Commis-
sioner ID aiming At?
SAMUEL UPJOHN.
Rector st. Lukes Church.
Germantown, October rs.
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1918-10-26
Member Of the Associated Press
END OF DAYLIGHT SAVING

snAYLIGHT saving will end for the
present tonight. Turn your watch and
the clocks back one hour when you retire.
Tomorrow morning you will find them in
step with all other timepieces and with
ne railway trains and the working sched-
ule of the rest Of the countr::'. The official
readjustment of the nations clocks will
take place a. a. M. when the hands will
Be moved back to / o'clock.
None of the experiments instituted in
this country since the war began has been
more successful, more popular or. on the
whole. more generally beneficial than that
which actually added an hour of sunlight
to everybody's working day. The wonder
II that such an arrangement was SO long
delayed and that the pressure of war was
necessary to force humanitv generally to
an arrangement so logical and so happy.
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1918-10-26
COLONEL HOUSE ABROAD

HsO MOST of the country Colonel Z.
= M. House is hazy and somewhat ro
mantle figure of mystery who is pre-
summed to be constantly busy with secret
and extraordinary services for the Presi-
dent and the country at large. There are
times when 1t must seem that he belongs
In book rather than in real life. The
extent of the Colonel's achievements. like
the nature of his service. is not generally
known. His presence in France at this
tlme would indicate that he is accustomed
- q silent place of iinmeasurable impor-
itance in the actual work of government.
Colonel House has appeared suddenly
II Europe as the veritable other self of the
President at a time when trying differ
ences remain to be settled among the
Allies themselves. Has he been sent as
the personal amba ador extra ordinary of
the President to impress upon Allied
Statesmen the need for a united policy for
peace as well as for war? Is he to be the
Presidents voice in Europe saying things
that may not be trusted even to the cables
or the wireless-appealing for unity of
diplomatic aim as we'll as for unity on the
battlefront?
: II Colonel House has been dispatched
- act for the President in the endeavor to
unity national aims and to arrange for
their open publication to the world he is
charged with one of the weightiest mis-
AlOns ever laid upon an American-espe.
ciaIly one holding no official position of
direct responsibility to the people
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1918-10-26
SOFT.PEDALINC THE WOODEN.SHIP
PROGRAM

CINCE the early outbursts of enthusiasm
~ over the prospect of Transforming
american virgin forests into Sub" "-defying
vessels have been lately followed with con.
siderable soft-pedaling OF that alluring
theme, officials of the Emergency Fleet
corporation are said TO be considering
> general readjustment of the wooden-s ship
program with view to limit the produc
tion."
The 3b0O.ton wooden commerce carriers
already finished or soon To be completed
Will, moreover, probably not be used in the
M9naatlantic trade. Chairman Hurley
Uoggests that some be placed in the oil
1nAde between Mexico and the United
mates, thus releasing steel tankers for
4uropean service, and that others be sub
3 oettuted for coal coast barges, whose feet
ts1ns to have been augmented with twenty.
lPe million dollars worth of new craft.
I 3he contract for their construction has
( n1en wisely cancelled.
q steel is prosaic. but it is thoroughly
apyactical. The idea of winning the war
su5th wooden ships was a characteristic
}qG6x Of our native romanticsm, which
- - typically has way Of yielding 10
1nA sense when all the conditions of a
& G6 emergency are fully appraised.
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1918-10-26
WHAT A CONGRESSMAN SEES
Semiekly Touching Washington Personalities
Familiar to Philadelphians
By J. Hampton Moore

sailed on all kinds of ships in all the seas
of the world and sometimes happened to
be the only American OF. board. When
the war broke out he registered In the
Eleventh Ward and being a seaman was
put in the fourth class. Then he went to
sea again and after three months landed
in San Francisco. Going ashore without
his registration card he was picked up by
the United States marshal aid sent to
an army camp. He managed to get the
situation explained to City Solicitor Con.
nelly, of Philadelphia. and then the Wash
ingtoh inquiry was started. Erbe's anxiety
for sea service, for which he was fitted, was
brought to the attention of the War
Department and the United States shipping
board. Mr.. Hurley said the shipping board
was in need of just such men. The War
Department said they would give Erbe up
If the merchane marine needed him. Much
correspondence ensued and Erbe's became
familiar case. Months elapsed, but the
correspondence continued. The merchant
marine demanded sailors qualified for the
service but Erbe remained in the army
camp. One day it developed that the young
sailor had been shipped 70 the embarkation
point. Nearly six months passed. Mr..
Hurley was again calling for young Ameri.
cans to go upon the ships Erbe's appli-
cation and Endorsements were still pend
ing Then the army order to move was
giveL. Erbe's furlough was granted, but
the war Department replied laconically.
TOO iate.' The young sailor is now with
the army in France and the merchant
marine is looking for men.
( NHARlES r. HAMILTON has been max.
ing some Washington inquiries con.
cerning his son, Ross who is now in
France The boy volunteered in the F'irst
city Troop last year and when the troop
was broken up he was assigned to the cav.
airy, United States Remount. 1854 EnRi-
neers' For the last six months he has been
connected with the 1Osd Mortar Trench
Battery with the fighting Twenty.eighth
DIVISION All reports concerning him have
been exceedingly favorable. Evidently the
boy Acquires his cavalry inclinations from
MS rather, who is enough Of a horselover
to take an occasional blue ribbon. The
Hamiltons, moreover. come from Reyoiu-
tionary STOCK, because of which Charles r.
keeps alive the family traditions through
active membership In the New Jersey so.
ciety OF Pennsylvania. An appropriate
thing for Colonel John C. Groome. who is
now organizing the military policy of the
American army in France, to do, would be
to corral the gallant young City Troopers
OF philadelphia under his wing and let
them work together. 1t would be like an
American Homecoming to that strangely
scattered band, but such things evidently
are not possible under existing military
Arrangements. OF the City Troopers, how
ever, 1t Is to be said that they went into
Mexico ana stayed on their job like men:
and when broken up and scattered to the
four corners Of the army, they took thetr
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1918-10-26
Washington, d. C., Oct. 26.

o>N'
INTEREST in the improvement of Darby
Creek is revived by petitions to Con.
gress for a survey OF that stream. The
Yocum. Powers Company, George Gray.
son, c. L. Serrill George Kyle, William +.
Taylor, the H. X. Mulford Company ana
other Philadelphians have written strong
letters or. the subject They claim that the
whole of the Delaware River front between
Chester and Philadelphia is now taken up
and undergoing improvements some OF
them of a national scope. and that the
time has come for the Darby region 10
be considered. Following the cue, Tor
which Theodore II. Burton, of Ohio. at one
time chairman of the Rivers and Harbors
Committee is responsible, they have begur.
to call their stream river-Darby River
since in Burtons day the charge of pork
barrel" in connection with "creeks" was
overcome by calling them rivers That
il how Cooper River. once familiar to
northern Camdenites as "Cooper's Creek
attained its present legislative distinction.
DED tape continues to be one OF the
~ cruelties Of official life. The more de-
partments, boards and commissioners we
create, the more red tape we have 10
unwind before the plain citizen can get sat
isfaction. And we have never had more OF
those bureaus than now exist. They puzzle
citizens, lawyers and members Of Congress
alike. And sometimes the Government
suffers even as the citizen does. IL the
nP ins RAJ fha 6enen0-
ents of soldiers are now, up against delays
and confusion approaching gthe-intoierable.
The pension bureau, the quartsrmasters
bureau and the war risk bureau each
must be consulted some time to ascertain
why a dependent wife ard children do not
receive the soldiers allotment. We are
doing many big things--some wonderful
things-in this great war, but there are
many small things, many essentials OF q
detailed nature, that shock and distress the
individual. An avalanche .Os grievances
has been coming forward with respect to
soldiers mail why II It not delivered
more regularly" is the query OF hundred
anxious writer's In single constituency
II have received no allotment Tor three
months" comes the lead pencil appeal Of
many poor wives of soldiers fghttnE for
their country in France. Won't you ask
the bureau to hurry It alons?" IN answer
to these inquiries Congress Is pr0vj1Ihg an
additional $7,b0o,000 for clerk hire and
incidentals The war risk bure4u alone
10 said to employ $4,000 clerks. but the
work less and correspondence IL delayed.
A consolidation Of these war bureaus n
being discussed, t@f
APPEALS for men to man the merchant
ships sound strange to Louis Erbe,
formerly Councilman from the Eleventh
Ward. whose son. Louis J. Erbe, has gone
| to Francs Since April. 1918, young Grbs
has bssn the subtect Of an unusual ana
sansvhat dlaepopinklnG iaquiey. 4 6re1a'
80 :; =. ':' s.|''
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1918-10-26
PRUNEs and pRfSMS
Roads

Roads
WE HAD forgot the little roads
w And all the trails they made
Through meadows purple with the sun
And silver g. the shade.
LOR we have walked the wide white way
Il Where all the passersby
Trudge soberly with Christian feet
And hold their straight heads high.
VL1E HAD f. rgot the fairy folk.
w And when we heard them tease,
We only thought the wind as high
Oat in the forest trees.
Nov let us leave the lonely road
~ That stretches endiessly
And follow all the little paths
That lead to Already.
BEATRICE wAsHBURN.
Never insist upon a thing until you
have it,
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1918-10-26
What Do You Know
QUIZ

QUIZ
!. WHIT st. A~:El;;ss statesman arrived IL Ersasi
g. wHS We rssy. :f:sr .yber tss ..|. G|s.,asi
Hers sSsSS q vSrisni '''':'''' -
3. WIS h thS psstAies u Msnssrs
4. what u Ne eeSttal u CsaAdas
g. WI: -. :s'1 i.'ss- - s''s'''' 's the vile
r.: -::..:ss::ii .s:ii !s:;' s1s;''' Is ~ -'.'~.-..' .'
T. wit f.;; 'ss:s:, !, the '.'s'''' y 'A'
.. What 10 . ukAaes
O. what was ~ fsll nsms q Isvd Byssns
10. what n WiiiisA :. hsyss's ssSvs ssaIss
Answers 70 Yesssrdsy's Quis
4. The veaeA resIIare.t y e:Appefl u :
:. o'H.s;t, Y !s5 E:: E:::.v Vice r''',1..s 4'''.s
s"Hs NJ. e. g; .i.' .i:'::ss :s1 '.:' e ~. ::
&3ssiIe - ps. ss...ssi 49,. j;sn 6 osvss
:. Tss Essass = s.stASs asss fss shs sshssAs
A';;' ';;a. :slsss:ss.i' i';'ssE;';e :::':se y:
. wyeEl. s1ssssss rassssssy vs'ss "rAs
!. 4 sasasae9l = Z hla1 4 Mas. K,
: = W % ~ sllt 1f
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1918-10-26
The League Of Notions

Dear Socrates-Permit me to apply for
membership in your League Of Notions.
have invented humor serum. by which
people of light. waggish dispositions can be
inoculated against excessive untimely
laughter and all the jocose fevers that
affiict the irresponsible. The treatment is
simplicity itself: 1t consists OF tieins the
patient to a post and reading aloud to him
half dozen pages of the Congressional
Record. After that he will never laugh
again.
The Limitation upon this serum IL trihing.
1t will not work within ten miles of Oyster
Bay. CALVERT CRAVAT.
We feel that there 10 still hope for the
German people. for sccordipS to Clement
Shorter who got II, from the Berlin TaSs-
blato three Of the plays now running In
Berlin theatres are HsMlst. ChsrietS Teste
(CAer'ts's Asstj ana SkesIeok UnIfse1.
Asrlia I. eensi1onhlv 1es2 l1 r.
l1lpH1n4 Z &. 6; 4. Y e "a e
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1918-10-26
More Thoughts on
a Bitter Theme

Gilbert Chesterton remarked once that
many forerunners would have felt rather
i'll if they had seen the thing they fore
ran. Sir Walter Raleigh, We feel. sure,
would never have invented smoking if he
had foreseen Swedish matches.
1t is a curious phenomenon that Scandi.
navian safety matches will peek boo your
trousers with burnt holes, though they
will set fire to nothing else. 1t is we'll to
keep your garments as far away posi-
BILE while engaged in the gymnastic of
rubbing tandstickers upon their box. We
call this "gymnastic' advisedy, for many
people believe in removing their clothing
while spending the evenir-: lighting a
safety Swede.
Speaking of Sir Walter Raleigh, the
Tobacco World (Philadelphia's smokiest
magazine) reminds us that rtXt Tuesday
is the 300th anniversary Of the death OF
that noble knight. He was beheaded at
the command Of King James in 1918, os-
tensibly for having frisked the spaniards
of some bullion, but probably because OF
his love of tobacco, which James detested
Every wellnurtured smoker will blow
few reverent whiffs on Tuesday in honor
of the shade Of Sir Walter.
According to our way of thinking, no
democracy can long endure which is not
based upon a faithful use of the corncob
pipe II the Czecho-Slav ind Polish and
Ruthenian and other statesmen now in
session at independence Hall Will teach
their future subjects to smoke the sooth
ing cob they will have comparatively few
ructions The corncob Is natures great
sedative, composer OF peevish minds and
antidote for hasty passion. II only we
had sent a shipload of corncob pipes to
Russia the Bolshevik uproar would have
Gained down long ago.
We are getting interested in these
Czecho.Slovaks. They are fine fellows, we
have no doubt; but still we hope they are
not entirely exempt from human failings
We wonder, for instance, whether Cxecho
Slovak husband and father ever forgets
to mail a letter, or keep on talking because
he doesn't know just how to break of
conversation that bores him. II SO, We
shall hall him as brother.
Here's Dove Again
The Kaiser cannot grind his teeth
At the liberation Of Liebknecht
Because they have already been
Set on edge
BY President Wilson's last note
DOVE DULCET.
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1918-10-26
This lnruly
World!

+ ng a d. France
This Cnruiy Italy, Portugal, Serbia,
world! the Slavs-Jugo and
czecho--as well as
Spain and Scandinavia officially voiced their
approval of President Wilson's manner of
handling the German situation Just after
Colonel Roosevelt announced his bitter dis
satisfaction in torrential telegram 70 the
Senate. We have money to bet that Europe
now wishes it had waited while and
avoided the weight of august displeasure
certain to fan upon it,
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1918-10-26
A Perfect Reply

10 the Editor Of the EveMtn0 Public Ledger:
Sir-I want to congratulate you upon the
splendid editorial upon the Presdent's note.
which appeared today in the EVENING
PUBLIC LEDGER.
To Its contents nothing can be properly
added nor taken away. 1t IL In itsef q per-
feet reply to the German letter ,.
JOSEPH MELLORs
Philadelphia. October 20.
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1918-10-26
AUSTRIA ON THE SLIDING BOARD

~ IN the House of Usher, the cracks
IN the House OF Hapsburg are, though
IN. not surprising. The crash now
1 fully under way Fiume the sole
rert OF Hungary, is seething with
A11nn rebellion. Budapest reports
Eonignation of the badgered Burian.
~. Hungarian Premier, founders
oG1ly and Is said also to have quit.
yo4iments in Karolivicz have over
- the junker yoke.
4 W1pconceiye the present dramatic
n exhausted Austria Hungary.
olnaining active troops are stsgger-
4he impact Of a terrific new ltal-
- 20 be hypercautious. That
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1918-10-26

Telephone service is
what Else approaching normal
Could They DO: condition. And we
suppose the telephone
company has rugged up a lot of extra dyna-
mos to carry the pent-up conversation OF the
gosspers who usually camp on one side of a
party wire for an hour at time.
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1918-10-26

The pay of a press
why There agent In of the
Are Scandals city departments is an
nounced as $25 week
good suppress agent Of the sort that the
average municipal department requires costs
q great deal more than that.
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1918-10-26

1t may be said, with
Home to Rsost out exaggeration. that
the legendary Fures,
embodiments Of great sins that return in
evitably to destroy their perpetrators, are
having a sort Of old home week In Berlin.
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1918-10-26

The Rsichstas has given Prince Maxi-
MILAN four-hfths vote Of confidence. but
what does the lacking nfth amount e g
leag - the Kaiser trusH hims
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1918-10-26

Quaint Quartets
We bought last week great big Bond
To knock the Kaiser silly
Now how about a few Thrift Stamps
To finish Little Willie?
You know H. our Triangle Huts
Music's what HE enjoys;
Come then across with mandolins
And records for the boys!
The Red Cros. we must all support
But how my money goes
! wish that were rich enough
To wear my Oldest "cloes!"
Though some war work is rath"y hard
| like it, / declare
AT last I've got really good
Excuse to bob my hair!
We used to end up our invites
With neat r. s. V. Ps-
Now in the corner we engrave
DO come-if you don't sneeze."
ARsINOE.
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1918-10-26

One may say, II one IL suhicientIy rsck-
less. that the House-ipg problem win bs
promptly put up TO Germany The colonel
OF the whole situation ID unmistakAble.
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1918-10-26

Perhaps the Berlin stocks which went
up yesterday are ptrtinsptly prophetic. III
that case Germany itself win soon follow
them.
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1918-10-26

Mr. Wilson wants a Democratic House
and 10 do all the Democratic Congressman.