davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Birmingham age-herald., 1917-02-21
THE HOOT-OWL SCHOOL

failing barometer, not only of popular
 taste but of the merit of the entertain ment that lies behind it.
 It was the late A. M. Palmer, one of the most distinguished managers of his
 day, who coined the phrase, "the critic of the box office" more than a third of
 a century ago, as a staggering counter blow to the scribes who had denounced
 play that the public was clamoring to
 see. The word commerce and its deriva- tives always stood for dignity and
 probity in aaffirs until the great money bags of the town were poured into the theatre with lavish hands. And when the last of that money had been absorbed in the quagmire of popular indifference, there remained to the investors the sat- isfaction of branding the successful play houses with the opprobrious. term conn mercialism.
 Now I say unreservedly that every dol- lar that passes in through the box office
 window is dedicated to the service of true dramatic art and that every dollar car ried around to the back door in a bag helps to pauperize and degrade it.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1917-02-21
Civic Institution

Don't let anyone for moment overlook the Hotel Tutwiler,' said John Wiegand yesterday.
 "This hotel is so large and blends so we'll into the skyline of the city that the average citizen quickly be- comes so accustomed to seeing it that the great building, believe, after a short time. becomes to him a part of the landscape; and he ceases to real ize the full significance that is rep resented by this investment of near ly $2,O0O,0oo located in the heart of the city.
 Naturally the first object of im- portance. next to the Terminal station, in the eyes of the visitor is the great hotel. In fact. it is the whole town itself to some persons who only so- Journ here for a day or so. But be- lieve the average citizen fails to real ize the splendid personal and social advantages to be derived from fre- quent visits to the Tut with its ball. room, public restaurant. grill and pri- vate dining rooms. However, if these fail to attract, he should not fail to visit the hostelry occasionally to give the glad hand to friends who may visit the citv"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1917-02-21
HOTEL LOBBIES
Delighted with Weather

Well, I had heard lot about the Sunny South, but I had no idea it was like this at this time of the year, sad Benjamin Samuel, prominent attorney or Chicago. "This is really delightful wealth CT, The storm Monday night, admit ragged rather severely, and 1t was almost impossible to sleep. But to find day like yesterday in February is something quite interesting to me. If you have much weather like this in Birmingham such boosters. I should certainly be booster for any country that could reg ister weather like this. It's really de- lightful."
The Birmingham age-herald., 1917-02-21
GETTING A LOAN

From the Cincinnati Enquirer.
 A mere man, being broke and in need of coin, entered the office of a salary of borrowing s1O for 90 days. The mere man was handed a long and fearsome looking application blank, and at exactly 2:30 D. m. proceeded to write answers to the following questions:
 "Is it true that your wife's second cousin once robbed poor box?"
 Have you ever had ringworms?"
 'Is your right ear larger than the left?"
 Are you twin? If not, why not?"
 Did any of your aunts on your moth CTS side use tobacco?"
 What is the distance from the nearest fixed star to Naked Dog, Maryland?"
 Did your great grandfather have a birth mark on his back?"
 Do you like caviare?'
 Where is the wind when it isn't blow ing?"
 Are you prejudiccd against crema- ton?"
 How many doses of castor oil have you taken since you were born?'
 Why is diplodocus?"
 And 221 similar interrogations.
 Having replied to all of the queries and used up two bottles of ink, at 5:30 p. m. the mere man handed in his application. signed a receipt for s1o, signed an order on his salary for s27, and received $2 in cash, and wearily departed.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1917-02-21
THE OLD COUNTRY STORE

scuttles of coal ashes where those who were fond of chewing could expectorate if they chose this place rather than the
 floor.
 One of the boys now playing checkers
 with one hand, we discover, has the digits of his other in a box of prunes | prying one loose, while some other fellow has handful of crackers in his pocket
 and shies one to his mouth as the occa- sion demands.
 Up on a stool in the corner, with g. black skull cap on his semi-bald pate sits the proprietor who Is also notary public, sec retary of everything and treasurer of everything else in town. He is looking over his book account and figuring which creditor will bring him cord wood, which
 will bring him hay. or which creditor will bring anything at all to square the bil
 In the back room a clerk is planning a dance with chum while he lets the mo- flasses run over the side of the jug and | the chum is devouring sample of the cheese comprising from one-quarter to half a pound.
 
 on boxes and old chairs about the stove telling stories and passing views relative to the mistakes made by members of the community who are not on hand, for 1 1t was always the ones who were not
 there who were given the "once over." Now the overall drummer comes in and the best checker player in the town beats
 him three or four straight games, after
 which the drummer buys the cigars and lis forevermore one of the best men who comes to the place. A woman comes in with her basket of eggs and off the coun- ter drop the young men and older ones like snakes and turtles from a log into the water.
 All this makes up the ordinary coun- try store. or at least it did when you and went there.g It was a good place.
 It holds sacred spot in our memory. Time goes on. and new hands take over l the place It is cleaned up, perhaps, and
 modern methods employed The crowd thins out night by night for it is not the same place. It may be thriving but
 the old touch is gone. Thus, one by one the old stores pass and we feel queer sensation near the region of our heart when we recall the days back home" Sentiment? Perhaps. But sentiment so dear and so keen that if a stray tear
 creeps from between our eye winkers, we
 do not feel ashamed.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1917-02-21
THE UNFoRG1vING AFFRoNT

Claude Callan, in the Fort Worth Star Telegraph.
 Now she hates one of her oldest friends. Yesterday she was downtown with this friend, and just before noon she said to the other lady: Well, I am going over here and catch my car" Then the other said to her: Well, I am going home, too; I'll go over on Main and catch mine. I am awfully glad l ran across you, and I want you to come to see me real soon.' Martha said she would, and the two parted. A few min utes later Martha went into a place to get bite of something to eat, and what do you think? Yes, there she was-eat- ing lunch. q didn't want her to ask me to go to lunch with her" Martha ex- plained to us after she returned from town, but I don't see why she wanted to slip away I don't see why she wanted to pretend that she was going home. I am sure 1 am able to buy my own lunch but I want her to return those patterns she borrowed, and I never expect to set foot in her house again.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1917-02-21
A LONELY CoNTINENT

From the National Geographic Magazine
 Australia is the most isolated of all inhabited continents and is remote from the center of all the worlds activities Northward the sailing distance to Japan is approximately 5000 miles; to India 250t miles. South America is 1000 miles to the east and Africa an equal distance west
 From London to the capital of Australia ships by the Suez route traverse approx. imately Il ,0OO miles of water and by the Panama canal 12,7s2 miles. From Cali fornia ports the routes via Samoa, ol Fiji, or Tahiti cover quarter of the cir conference of the earth. Australia's only large civilized neighbor within radiu. of 1000 miles IS Java.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1917-02-21
Birmingham Best After All

Well, Birmingham is good enough for me" remarked J. A. Randy yesterday.
 Until a few months ago, I was not so sure that this was the best city in the south. I had heard other cities boosted so loudly and for so long that I wished to judge for myself. Therefore, the first time I had the leisure I decided to go on little tour of inspection.
 T visited Atlanta, Chattanooga, Mont gomery, Greenvile, Meridian and several others towns about whose civic pride I had heard considerable comment A trip of this kind is a good experience for anyone. It was a treat to see the fertile cotton lands of Georgia, Mississippi and of southern Alabama.
 T met large number of excellent peo- pie in all of the cities named, especially Montgomery; but somehow the streets and thoroughfares of these old munich palities seemed to lack the rush and hustle of the downtown business section of the Alabama metropolis.
 And most of all I missed the smoke which constantly curls or belches from the countless stacks of the Birmingham m district. Let no one get the idea that Birmingham is not thoroughly metropoli- tan as compared with other cities in this section of the country"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1917-02-21
LUKE M'LUKE SAYS

Why is it that the woman who claims that she wants to enlarge her sphere al ways wears corset to reduce it IS much as possible?
 The reason why girl gets so mad when her brother musses up her hair is be- cause she would enjoy the experience if some other girls brother did it. Of course, it is none of our business But we have often noticed that the sort
 of woman who will pay $500 for a poodle wouldn't pay five cents for baby. This is queer world. Once in while you will see a married woman who has a face and shape like Abe Lincoln, while another girl who is well built and good locker has to remain single because mo- body seems to want her There is bright sGe to everything You may have noticed that the women are not using so much corn starch on their faces since the price of groceries went up so high
 Working all night won't hurt you half as much as playing all night. A man wants to know something about a girl before he will hire her and put her in his office. But he isn't that careful be- fore he weds a girl and puts her in his home.
 Modern styles may be improvements on
 
 to be able to take stroll with the old fashioned girl whose skirts rustled when
 she walked?
 The man who would commit almost any thing but murder to get money is the same fellow who is always abusing the rich because they have money. If a man had to stand on the street corner alone for minute on a cold day he would get half frozen. But he can | stand on a street corner on cold day and talk mushy to chicken for an hour and his temperature will be about 99. | What has become of the uld-fashioned house that had big iron knocEer fas- l tened to the door and an iron foot scraper beside the door? One reason why man should be punc- | tual is because he will have to wait around for half hour until the other fellow gets there.
 | The man who can't run SIP week job can always tell you how the government
 should be run.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1917-02-21

From Commentator in the Theatre
 by James l.. Ford, in the March Scrib-
 ner
 m spell of what I call, in my simple
 fortunate enough to fall under the = spell of what I call in my simple,
 kindly fashion, the "hoot-owl'' school of thought, in honor of bird that flaps its wings and hoots instead of talking sense, commercialism and the critic of the box office are the two most thor oughly discredited figures in the theatri- cal world As my own slender knowledge Of the stage has been derived from an- other school-that of experience tempered by reflection-I feel moved to say a few words in defense of these two much ma lgned and but little understood figures. For I have long since arrived at the belief that commercialism in the theatre means a great deal more than mere money making; that 1t Is abso- lutely essential to the highest forms of dramatic art, and that the ticket rack, on which the box office critic writes his opinion in indelible ink, is an almost un-
The Birmingham age-herald., 1917-02-21
Glad tO be Here

"A man never knows today where he's going to be tomorrow, said o. L. Dunn, manager of the traffic bureau. For in- stance, several months ago I thought l was a fixture in Chattanooga and so did all my people. And here I am in Bir- mingham. I had to leave a practically new home that I had just built, and numerous connections of long standing. However, l am mighty glad to be here. My wife is not quite reconciled to leav- ing Chattanooga yet but I am sure when she gets to Birmingham she will like it, especially as she is a native Alabamian. have been to Birmingham on many different occasions and am already very much attached to the place.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1917-02-21
THE WORD

By John Masfield. My friend, my bonny friend. when we
 are old, And hand in hand go tottering down the
 hill, May we be rich in loves refined gold, May loves gold coin be current with
 us still. May love be sweeter for the vanished
 days,
 And your most perfect beauty still as
 dear As when our troubled singer stood at gaze In the dear March of most sacred
 year. May what we are be all we might have M been,
 And that potential. perfect. o. my
 friend And may there still be many sheafs tc glean
 In our loves acre. comrade, till the end And may be find when ended is the page Death but a. tavern on our pilgrimage.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1917-02-21
TIRE TROUBLE.

For incidence that gives one pause Observe Erasmus Cages, Who bought a book and wept because He had to cut the pages
 Birmingham Age-Herald. Far worse than indolent, we say, Is Nicodemus Rucker Who never whistles on his way;m It's too much work to quicker. "
 Youngstown Telegram. For indolence we recommend That good old scout. Bill Heth, Who had to ask an artist friend To help him draw his breath.
 Springfield Union. Down from upstairs Bill moved his bed He was a lazy pup; You see it's down and T. he said Don't have to make it up.''
 Newark Advocate.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1917-02-21
WORLDS GREATEST LABoRAToRy

Charlton Bates Strayer, in Leslie's.
 New York city is the greatest human laboratory on the face of the globe. With representatives gathered from every nook and corner of the earth, the great Amer ican melting pot is here at it's best. Men of science are losing rare privilege in not making use of this unique social laboratory. The Henry Phipps Clinic, an integral part of Johns Hopkins university at Baltimore is engaged not alone in the study of the laws of temperament and character Prof. Stewart Patton of the department of biology of Princeton makes the pertinent suggestion that science ought to take account of the wonderful experiments nature herself is making in cosmopolitan New York. Social agencies of various sorts are interested in the dis ease, poverty, crime, etc., which mark the end of the experiments nature is making in this human laboratory but too little effort is being made scientifically to control and shape these influences dur ing the experimental stage.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1917-02-21
A Joint Celebration

Much interest among the Pythians in the district is being taken in the district convention that will be held in the city on Thursday said R. T. Randall of Ensley. Ut will be an un- usual affair in that as the date is the anniversary of Washington's birthday and also the anniversary of the order of Knights of Pythias, it will be in the nature of a combined patriotic and fraternal affair and will tend to show how closely the two are allied. Patriot ism is a cardinal principle of the Pythian order and the occasion will further the patriotic spirit of our members which has always been noted In addition to the usual executive meeting we will have an open ses- sion to which all our friends are in- vited."
The Birmingham age-herald., 1917-02-21
SPELLING

From the Montgomery Advertiser.
 Considering the number of times Ed gar Allan Poe's name appears in print. it is strange that erudite editorial writers insist on spelling his middle name Al len. Age Herald.
 One could think that Macaulay's name should also be spelt correctly. but how often do we see it spelt "Macauley ?''- Albany (Ala) Advertiser.
 And one might think that good speller could spell it spelled" instead of "spelt." MT A. Carnegie and Mir. Roosevelt to the contrary notwithstanding. Carnegie and Roosevelt are republicans, dear Adver- tiser, and good democrat should not be taken in by their fads
The Birmingham age-herald., 1917-02-21

Charles l.. Rundell, in the Chatham Re- publican.
 NPRINKLED around throughout the N country, but getting fewer and " fewer each year, as we pass over the country roads, we find the old stores. Each one has world of history con- nected with it's life and active business career and each in It's respective com- munity might tell tale parallel to the
 other except that names and faces diff fel ed.
 Let us take look back to one of these stores where we as barefooted children used to run in, with our pennies and buy our cents worth of candy each, or in the spring as soon as piece of ground
 foot square had dried sufficiently, we
 bought for cent, 10 marbles of various colors and perhaps for another cent, big glass shooter"
 As we go in tho door of that old store we see a shelf of tinware such as dip pers, tunnels, tin cups and basins. Un-
 der this shelf perhaps was box or two filled with felt boots and overs while beside 1t was a box of rubbers for the "wimmen folks On another shelf back of the counter was pile of prints, cali coes and ginghams, while above that shelf an assortment of pins. needles. pin cush-
 ions, hose supporters. arm bands. combs. brushes, ribbon, playing cards, spectacles, hair pins, harmonicas, etc. Up near the ceiling where the winter coal fire had smoked the whtewash to a
 black, oily finish. we find boxes of mus tard seed, bird seed. carpenters chalk,
 bluing, stove backing and showed back
 out of sight, perhaps, a few mop han dies.
 In one back room was the flour mo- forks and handles and hanging from a
 row of nails driven at proper space apart ar assortment of horse whips | Then drug shelf containing cough medicine, herb teas, castoria, paregoric, quinine and under this shelf tobacco. chewing and smoking, and next to this counter was the candy where youthful noses poked up against the glass, scented
 the flavors in their imagination, of what
 the new stuff" tasted like.
 Inc one back room was the flour, mo-
 lasses. sugar. codfish rope. wall paper. few pairs of work shoes nails, hinges and other hardware, etc. Then there
 was the oil tank and the paint and var
 nish. the barrel of whiting. the drum or
 red barn paint and the cans of white
 lead.
 1 These things and hundreds of other items made up the country store where you could purchase anything from a needle to . crowbar The store was the place where the male population gathered of an evening and where a game of checkers or perhaps cards was going on. ! A board raised up from the floor and
 placed around the stove penned in . few
The Birmingham age-herald., 1917-02-21
NOT NUTRITIOUS

From the Savannah Press.
 Now comes reader of the New York Herald with the statement that corn meal as a nutritious diet is snare and delu- sion. The authority who claimed that 8 cents worth of corn meal contained as much nourishment as a dozen eggs or a pound of meat is shown to have been sadly mistaken.-B Birmingham Age-Her- aid.
 The average cornbread authority these days does not get in reach of a dozen eggs or a pound of meat often enough to crn corn pone
The Birmingham age-herald., 1917-02-21
cAMIEzMM1@uuleH
ANIMAL IS STRANGE PARADOX

ANIMAL IS STRANGE PARADOX
 From the National Geographic Magazine.
 The most primitive order of mammals, the monotremes are confined to Australia.
 There is the platypus, strange beast which lays eggs like turtle, but suckles
 Tits young; has horny pads for teeth and a bill like the duck; it's front feet are webbed and both back and front feet have
 claws. Little wonder that he has re- ceived many names or that his scientific designation is Ornithorhynchus para
 doxus.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1917-02-21

Thomas A. Edison is said to be work ing day and night to perfect the one man submarine. Thomas rather brides himself on losing sleep.
 * x The high price of white paper has not prevented some newspaper publishers from issuing "extras on the slightest provocation.
 * K There is a man in Birmingham who has read several long novels while wait ing for his wife who would be down in a minute"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1917-02-21
Poles Ayerse to
F'ighting For Germany

4gGGV8BIg U W1 S5S4 GA4@1Gy THE new Polish kingdom, pro- S claimed with such pomp and ceremony by the central pawers, seems to have proved fiasco. The better informed Poles perceived that the scheme matched at Potsdam was intended primarily to form a Polish army to fight with the Teuton armies against the entente.
 Late advices state that so far only few hundred Poles, most of them
 oung students who were carried away by enthusiasm and their belief in the speedy restoration of Poland as an autonomous state, have enlisted. The two army corps which Germany expected to get from Poland still ex ist largely on paper and it is pre- dicted that they will never be organ ized.
 Polish peasants are so averse to be- coming soldiers that they are going to Germany in large numbers, preferring to work in munitions factories and other industries, where they think they will be safe from conscription. Polish leaders are inclined to wait and see how the war is going to end. Ger many's chances to win the war are considerably less promising now than they were six months or a year ago and unless her submarine campaign proves far more successful than it has to date, she will never be able to 'starve out Great Britain.
 There may be another Polish king some day, but at present possible can- didates must defer their hopes. The issue has not yet been decided. The Poles are wise in adopting policy of watchful waiting.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1917-02-21
Brains Applied
 to Farm Work

M GRICULTURE has always had 3S an attraction for men who love nature as seen in field and forest; and in this day of applied science it is more fascinating than ever. No business rould be of more absorbing interest than scientific farming; and no industry has made greater prog ress in recent years than agriculture. The United States government has done wonders in this respect. Its demonstration work has been worth untold millions to the country. And following the enterprise of Uncle Sam's department at Washington, the railroads, the agricultural schools and the department of agriculture in the various states are doing much to add to the wealth of all sections.
 Alabama has an admirably con- ducted agricultural department and the bulletins which Commissioner Wade is issuing at frequent intervals are of exceptional value to the farmer.
 In spite of the boil weevil the year 1917 promises to be one of marked prosperity. Science and human indus try will do their part.