davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Birmingham age-herald., 1917-12-11
LUKE, M,LUKE SAYS

Avon,an may nut up bluff that she is conserving by wearing hhee. hivb skirt. But we won's believe tnat aha Ia really sincere until she goes out without wearing about hall or a oo4Iaf box of red camouhage on her race.
 And what doth it profit woman to save food stuffs in the kitchen anu then use up box of perfectly sooo corn starch in manufacturing com plexion?
 woman doesn't always use those big rainbow -colored bags to carry ner knitting in. She has discovered that thav come in mighty handy when she has to bring home a peck or potatoes or Is going shoplifting.
 There was tine when man was considered effemirlate if he wore wrist watch. But nowadays he Is considered effeminate if he doesn't know how to Knit.
 Wa do not know much. But we do know that when all the men have gone to war and women comprise the juries in our courts, pretty female attorney isn't going to win many cases when homely female attorney represents the other side
 Married men Nare supposed to know more about women than old bachelors do. But this is all wrong. 1T married men knew as much about women as old bachelors do. they wouldn't be married.
 Of course you have right to say just what you think in this country. But if you exercise your right you are going to wear one or both of your eyes in mourning most of the time About the time married man begins to entertain an idea that he could have done better in the matrimonial market This wife begins to entertain an idea that she couldn't have done worse. | Another reason why you should not order clam chowder in cheap hasf house Is because you will discover thai 1 while what they serve you may be cold l 1t is not a bit clammy.
 |, Dogs are a whole lot like men. Ever notice how brave an alley cur gets when he discovers that a bull dog i: wearing a muzsle?
 l Every romantic princess Is doomed \ to disappointment because the mutt shs will marry will not display any of thu
 fierce, undying brand of love she seei
 in the movie f1llums.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1917-12-11
MODERN VERSION.

MODERN VERSION. .rhat old saying. You're not the snly pebble on the beach, had wide currency some years ago"
 "Yes but it's antiauated slang now. The up-to-date way of rebuking & per son who has an exaggerated idea of his own importance is to tell him his pic- ture will never appear on postage stamp"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1917-12-11

| ing heaven that they are able to fight for their country. It is a shame that any able-bodied citizen of military age should quibbIe about technicalities for the purpose of keeping out of the war. The public rightly holds in con tempt pigeon-livered men, but fortu- nately towards as we'll as traitors are approximately few in numbers. The masses are patriotic.
 The governments brief is clear, clean-cut presentation, at once en- and stimulating, and should be widely read. * # *
 The Austrian premier, who says Will sons address to Congress is not clear, should box the ears of his translator, or else acquire more familiarity with the English language.
 # # #
 There is ,well-founded suspicion that the average soldier would rather see boxing match than hear lady elocu- tfonist speak a piece about the beautiful snow.
 The German peace terms offered the Bolsheviki show that the Teutons are consistent cusses, anyhow, at least so far as peace terms go.
 % # # British and French troops which have taken their stations along the Italian battle front know how to handle the Kaiser's shock units.
 # # * Nicholas Romanoff may be trying to "come back Alt /the present writing Kaledines and Korniioff seem to stand the better chance.
 # # 2. A Birmingham girl is now private sec retary to Mrs. Howard Gould. However, there are other reasons why Birmingham is on the map.
 # # x The old saying, "Go to Halifax" has been reversed. People are urged not to go to Halifax, unless they have urgent business there.
 There is more than remote possibility that the Don Cossacks will have some thing to say about the settlement of Rus sia's affairs.
 sThe origin of the fire is mystery" That is getting to be familiar line in the newspapers and it contains food for thought.
 General Maurice in England and Secre- taries Baker and Daniels in America tell us all we ought to know about the war. < S # bayonet school is no place for mollycoddle. The graduation exercises" do not call for flowers and bonbons.
 x * as The little chap who won't give his best friend a bite off his apple is practicing food conservation with vengeance.
 * x # What German conspirators in this coun- try couldn't do to the Jacob Jones' a U-boat accomplished.
 ;: * * Ye indefatigable bootlegger is having some difficulty in stocking up for the Christmas trade.
 * $: # "Cellaritis'' is much more prevalent III Washington than pneumonia is in the training camps.
 # * * The tall timber is waiting for him, but Senator LaFollette fingers in Washing ton.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1917-12-11
EMBARRASSING DESCRIPTION.

Does the boy write about any of his narrowing experiences as soldier?"
 T should say he does!' replied MT. Cobbles.
 'Is he fighting in the front line trenches?'
 Not yet but Henry's description of answering reveille on cold morning is as narrowing as any account I've read of soldiers going over the top /"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1917-12-11
c3mIEzMMlAa1ntfH
SARCASTIC EDI4OR
The Kansas City Star.

From the Kansas City Star.
 'The editor of the Plaindealer. who is always bowling at the rest of us to ob- serve meatless and wheatless days. is doing his bit for conservation. sarcas- ticaliy said the landlord of the Petunia Tavern. "He has seven newsless days every week.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1917-12-11
REVENGE.

"Confound these snooping detectives!, exclaimed the prosperous bootlegger. They've seized another trunk of mine full of wet goods. But I'll get evsn.''
 What are you going to do?''
 I'm going to board the train It New Orleans with trunk tuil of pickles and let them work their fool heads off for nothing"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1917-12-11
KuLTuR,s ExPoNENrs.

The more we read of kultur
 And all that kultur means The sack of captured cities,
 The ruthless submarines, The helpless babies slaughtered
 To make a holiday, The women violated,
 The old men dragged away To slave for Teuton masters,
 And other crimes so great, A world aroused to action
 Doth burn with righteous hate The more we read of kultur The more we yearn, egad. To boot the Hohenzollerns
 From Berlin to Bagdad.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1917-12-11
DON'T BE AFRAID TO SCRUB

From the Herrin Qll) Journal.
 Turkish baths are now opened under the City National bank. Visit this health lavatorium and you will see 1t grow under the management of Prof. c. E. Destro Dead animals hauled away free. Call 17S
The Birmingham age-herald., 1917-12-11

BEGINNING THE DAY--O great and gracious God! Not to work for Thee but to let Thee work through me! Not to spend my strength but to give Thy strength its chance! 0 to be to God "what His own hand is to a manw Amen.-H. M. E.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1917-12-11
Sheffield Hustliag

''I have just returned from trip 70 Sheffield, and believe mo that IS some hustling burg just now" said W. N Driver. manager of the Hillman hotel
 Those people up there are, or course. counting big upon the gov ernment development of Muscle Shoals and they are on the job every minute. But the fact that is most impressive Is their unanimity of effort. their te- nacity and boundless faith in their town. They are going to have three times the people in Sheffield in an other year as they have now. If every thing goes well with them, and the present plans are executed"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1917-12-11
Changes Passionate

q have resigned at West Woodlawn Baptist church to accept call to the Avondale Baptist church. made vacant by the going of Rev. John w. Inzer to Mobile" said Rev. w. P. Reeves.
 T have enjoyed my work at West Woodlawn. It is rather unusual for a preacher when he makes change of pastorates to merely move 8 few blocks away, but this is what I am doing. I believe there is a great op- portunity for service at Avondale. The people have built a handsome new church and are thoroughly organized for aggressive work"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1917-12-11
Auureciated Barnett Story

"When I concluded reading the ar ticle in The Age-Herald about Dothan, by Frank Willis Barnett, almost made up my mind to take the next train for the wiregrass city, so con clusively did MT. Barnett cover the meritorious points of that section or Alabama" said Aieck c. Montgomery. president of the Real Estate exchange.
 You know realtor ought to know good description of a batch of real estate when he sees it, and when it is carried into all of the fine points Of improvements. and the people that in- habit the place, I am sure that l can say without reservation that Mir. Bar nett's article left nothing unsaid in favor of Dothan."
The Birmingham age-herald., 1917-12-11
Reclamation Refused

T offered my resignation as pastor of the Pratt City Baptist church on yesterday" said Rev. F. l.. Durant, but the church refused to accept 1t.
 'I have not yet fully made up my mind as to what I will do In the premises. While it is a difficult field, I have greatly appreciated the help of many who stood by me. There is plenty of work to be done, and have al- ways liked to be busy"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1917-12-11
pr shclburne Herc

q am over for a short visit to see my family and get in touch with How ard college said pr. q. M. Shelburne, the president, but who was released to become social-education director un- der the army Young Mems Christian association at Camp Wheeler. Con ditions along health lines are being improved, and those in charge feel that the worst is over. While the death rate has been high, I am sure that all of the alarming rumors sent out broad cast over the country were, to say the least of them, overstated."
The Birmingham age-herald., 1917-12-11
IN HOTEL LOBBIES
 AND ELSEWHERE
Major auirlx Hears Biliy sunday

Major QuirIx Hears Billy Sunday
 Tt was my pleasure to be in Atlanta last Saturday and Sunday and my whe
 and went to hear Billy Sunday three
 times,'' said Major Quirk of the saiva-
 tion Army. T was very much pleased with Mir Sunday in a great many ways.
 He is earnest. fervent and sincere. UT course he Is unique in that he says the most remarkable things-things that mo- body else could or would say. I heard his sermon on temperance and 1t was
 wonderful. The man has a tremendous amount of magnetism and he sways ms audiences as few other speakers coulo' He spoke of going to France; in tact' referred to it many times and at one of his services a. splendid, fine looking officer-a major of 25 years in the Unit ed States army-arose and said if ms influence and his life which had been dedicated to the Master for 9 years could serve as an example to others ne and his boys would help them to go over the top, and with these words zoo Of his men marched, while Mir. Rode HSdNSA anu tuo CuOII c1h6 Fort for I Am Coming-that old song we all love SO we'll. I think Billy sun day does a great deal of good. I was III Philadelphia last spring about six weeks after his great meeting there. talked with a half dozen conductors on street cars. heard several Of them hum ming or whistling soma of the biily Sunday songs. and that's what attracted my attention. I talked with them ana each told me they had hit the traii when Billy was there and when l asked them how about their lives and their feelings after he left. they said they'd joined the church and were leading Christian lives. There were about loUo people out to hear Billy Sunday iast Sunday afternoon and l was told that the crowds had been much larger, put the weather was SC disagreeable and cold that it kept many back. We met Mir. Sunday and Ma too, and 4iked them very nluch.'
The Birmingham age-herald., 1917-12-11
A Popular Place

"Every now and then I hear some thing which gives me great pleasure said Joe Loveman. "I was told recently that a charming woman from a neigh. boring town came to Birmingham 10 shop without any thought of spending the night. At train time she went to the Terminal to catch a fast train and found that it had been annulled It seems her husband is a railroad man and she upbraided him for not teie' phoning or writing her. Man-like he said, But, my dear, I didn't know how to reach you But this did not sat- isfy her, and looking him in the face she replied, Silly, why didn't you have me paged at Loveman, Joseph & Loeb's.'"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1917-12-11
\ Mothers Gift

Tt seems that some mothers have been compelled to give what seems to be more than their share of soldiers to Uncle Sam," said C. $. LeCren.
 T happen to know that Mrs. Hen dricks, who lives near Greenviile' Ala, has three sons with the Rain bow division and one boy in the navy"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1917-12-11
ADRIF'T WITH THE TIMES
SOLVING THE PROBLEM.

There must be no knitting in this courtroom said the judge, sternly.
 There was consternation among the fashionabiy dressed women who had come to hear the details of breach-of- promise suit.
 Your honor" said one naughty dame. i've are knitting for soldiers
 Very well, madam. have no objec- tions, but I would advise that you do your knitting at home and have the pro- ceedings of this court read to you by your next of kin, if you are too busy to hold newspaper for yourself
The Birmingham age-herald., 1917-12-11
IIELps THAT MUCH.

HELPS THAT MUCH, We labored a lot And we added our brain And all that we got Was this feeble quatrain. -B. l.. T.. in Chicago Tribune. Still, at the same time, When hitting Tn pinches, Stuff like this here will Fill up two inches.
 Macon Telegraph. It's filling 1t up And hitting the spot, Though critics may call It veritable rot.
 Walton Tribune. By coming in late We heavily score; Instead of two inches We're filling up four.
 Savannah Press Onr poor added brain Is in such fix. We cannot refrain From making it six.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1917-12-11

o thou monster, ignorance. how de- f~4m'd dOst thou look!
 Loves Labors Lost.
 * x $
The Birmingham age-herald., 1917-12-11

INoU1srTIvE PHILANTHROPY. Boss, will you help poor unfortunate who was confined to his room for three years?"
 .'Why, yes I don't mind contributing a quarter. Did your room happen to have-er-bars across the window and a peep-hole in the door?"
 PAUL COOK.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1917-12-11

Entered at the Birmingham, Ala. nastoff{ce as second-class matter un- der act of Congress, March 8, 1879.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1917-12-11

No communication will be published without it's authors name. ReJeeted manuscript will not be returned unless stamps are enclosed for that purpose
The Madison daily leader. [volume] (Madison, S.D.) 1890-current, 1917-10-31
THE CITY.
WEATHER FORECAST.

Generally fair tonight and
Thursday; no decided change in
temperature.
-. =: -: - - - -
The Madison daily leader. [volume] (Madison, S.D.) 1890-current, 1917-10-31
A WORD ABOUT THE DELIVERY
SERVICE QUESTION.

Inasmuch as the majority of our
customers have been very, very con-
siderate in the past in the matter of
carrying their own bundles, If small,
we have refrained from making much
mention of the subject. However, it
can be easily understood that a very
important ideal underlies the plea of
the government to curtail every un-
necessary expense. And you must re
member that every parcel taken along
with you helps just so much in keep
ing costs down, and in allowing labor
to be used where ii is more neces-
sary.
We are not going to lessen our
service to you except in cases where
the service is an unnecessary waste.
However, on and after November /,
we are going to make a charge of 5
cents for the delivery of any order of
less than 81. Cooperate with us and
bunch your orders.
j. A. Johnson.
The Madison daily leader. [volume] (Madison, S.D.) 1890-current, 1917-10-31
BUDDE BARN BURNS
EARLY MORNING FIRE BURNS
BARN, HORSES, HAY AND
MACHINERY.

With all its contents of IL horses,
hay, machinery and harness. this
morning at 5 o'clock the barn on
the place occupied by Fred Budde,
four miles northeast of Madison, was
burned to the ground. The place be-
longs TO Mrs. F. Guerin, of this city.
The building was insured for 500 by
the owner. The contents are said to
be insured for small amount
The alarm clock woke the family
at their regular hour for rising. Aft
er dressing, Mrs. Budde opened the
door and saw that the barn was en-
veloped in flames. Quickly calling
her husband and rousing the nearby
neighbors, attempts were made to
save what they might. Their efforts
were without result, and IL head of
horses, Is tons of hay, all the har-
ness, and many farm implements
stored in an attached shed were de
stroyed. The flames had so far sur
rounded the place that entrance was
impossible The origin of the fire is
unknown. Nobody had been to the
building this morning, no lantern
had been used last night and there
had been no smoking in the barn.
The barn was a frame structure,
80 by "a, 12-foot posts with hip roof.
At the side was a shed for machin-
cry, 16 by 80, with 12-foot posts
Beside the barn was a small chicken
house at some distance. 1t, too, was
! burned.
Hans Urdahl, in charge of the af-
fairs for the estate, said today that
the barn would be rebuilt at once
but OF somewhat smaller dimensions
Estimates are even now in the hand:
OF the lumber firms for the bills o.
lumber
The Madison daily leader. [volume] (Madison, S.D.) 1890-current, 1917-10-31
RESOLUTIONS.

Whereas, God, in His infinite wis
dom, has seen fit to remove from
our midst and his labors of love and
service, to his eternal home above,
our beloved friend and brother, w.
NJ Beardsley, therefore,
Be it resolved, That we, as mem
bers of Madison lodge No. 20, /. o.
F., hereby extend to the bereaved
family our sincere sympathy. Re-
alizing there will be a vacancy in the
home where he was kind husband
and father, in the church of which
he was devoted member and in the
lodge in which he ever practiced true
fraternal relation sto all, and that
the community loses a good citizen
we must submit to the will of Him
who doeth all things well, therefore
Be it further resolved, That a
copy of these resolutions be sent tc
the family of our departed brother
one inscribed on the records sof this
lodge and one given to the local pa
pers for publication.
Fraternally submitted,
&C. s. McVay,
F. l.. Burnett,
j. H. Wines,
Committee
The Madison daily leader. [volume] (Madison, S.D.) 1890-current, 1917-10-31

composed of p. Patet, w. Jung, w.
Rohrer and r. Backhaus; Prof. A.
Bretzius, ''The Strangers Viewpoint
of the Glass;" Rev. w. S. Argow,
THE Goal and Influence of the
Glass" An intermission to "get ac-
quainted" was followed by a feed"
served by the members of the class
If the visions received last night and
the plans suggested are an indication
OF future activities, then great things
can be expected. Everyone went
away enthusiastically fully resolved
TO do their bit Contributed
The Madison daily leader. [volume] (Madison, S.D.) 1890-current, 1917-10-31

For Rent. Seven room house,
First street SE.-Bert Thomas.
Yardman wanted at the Lake
Park.
For Sale or Rent. Four room cot
tage. Inquire at this office.
Eat at Jacks.
For Rent. Two furnished rooms,
close in, heat and bath.-H. Z. Pow
ell, Phone 3217.
See Millard for flour.
Eat at Jacks.
Take your next meal at Rays Res
taurant, 35 cents.
For Rent. Five room cottage
with barn.--Mrs. VIM. Roche, Phone
1895.
The Madison daily leader. [volume] (Madison, S.D.) 1890-current, 1917-10-31
CROSSING STREETS
CITY TO MAKE EFFORT TO HAVE
CROSSINGS OBSERVED-TOO
LIABLE TO BE HIT.

There are legions of How to"
books extant. They treat of every
subject under the sun. One may buy
books now and receive a past master
ship in anything from How to Live
Comfortably on 10000 a Year." or
How to Make Delicious Irish Lace
from Potato Parings." There seems
to be but one break in the continuity
of the line of human endeavor. That
is in the matter of walking on the
street.
The city commission Monday night
took cogniaznce of the many narrow
escapes and the one recent accident
by persons "jaywalking" across cor
ners. They declare that though au-
tomobilists conform to every rule of
the game, even to stopping dead still,
there will yet be danger to this spe
cies of traffic derelict. The person
angling across cannot judge of the
direction nor speed of the machine
making the turn, nor can the ma
chine judge of where the person will
be at the time their paths cross.
And If their time of crossing Is at
approximately the same instant it is
easy to know which of them gets the
worst of the encounter.
The commissioners considered the
advisability of issuing warning to
the public through the public prints,
warning them against the dangerous
practice. They also intend to in
struct the police department to abate
the custom in Madison. Now. let's
watch what effect it will have.
Be it known that great suffering
was imposed on autoists in the early
spring, because. after wide and in
sistent publication and warning, the
sheriff and police began arresting au-
toista for not having number plates
according TO law. Technicalities and
almost invisible points of law and
justice were discussed learnedly to
| justify the improvident driver in not
having a number issued in Ammo
Domini, and against the injustice of
the officers demands.
Then again, the night lights.
Warnings, warnings, warnings. Com
mands. Finally threats-and not a
person, apparently, paid the least at
tention. Then came the Saturday
night festivities in police and justice
court circles. For months had the
traffic cops stood on the intersections
and stopped machines with admoni-
ton to have their lights trimmed and
burning. Each intercepted driver
was greatly surprised at the informa-
ton that his lights were not burn
ing, but the condition was not i'm
proved Then began the assessment
of taxes for the privilege of avoiding
the law. There was marked diff
ference almost at once.
Now comes the later game. viii
any warning or threat by commission
or police department do any good?
Will people accustomed to going
straight to their objective mend
their ways? Not with warnings.
Not by the active urging of the po-
lice, nor by the officers sending the
transgressors back to try to find the
crossing place. Unless there are ar
rests made there will not be a dozen
of the habitual "jaywalkers" con-
verted. The commission will either
have to let the street passenger look
out for himself or be defeated in
their effort.
The Madison daily leader. [volume] (Madison, S.D.) 1890-current, 1917-10-31

Insure buildings and live stock in
the Farmers Mutual Tornado Insur-
ance company. of Madison. S. D. Or
ganized one year. $2,000.000 of in
surance written first year. Rates
less than half Of. old line insurance.
Covers Lake, Moody. Brookings.
Kingsbury, Miner. McCook and Min
nehaha counties. See local repre-
sentatives. C. J. Johnson, #. J. Krug
or J. L. Sunde.
The Madison daily leader. [volume] (Madison, S.D.) 1890-current, 1917-10-31
SOCIAL EVENING
MEMS BIBLE CLASS OF THE GER
MAN BAPTIST CHURCH.

About As members of the pastors
Bible class of the German Baptist
church met last evening in their
rooms in the basement of the church
for social time. An interesting
program was carried out. After a
sing the following made short,
practical talks: VIM. Helling, The
Possibilities of the Class; Fred
Schroepel, THE Musical Opportuni-
ties of the Glass;; Oscar Mueller,
Our Soldier Boys; male quartet
The Madison daily leader. [volume] (Madison, S.D.) 1890-current, 1917-10-31
Eat at Jacks.
See Millard for flour.


Three rooms suitable for light
housekeeping for small family, close
in.-Phone 1884.
Girl wanted at the Sugar Bowl.
Good wages to right party.
See Millard for flour.
For Rent. Two furnished rooms,
modern, two blocks east new postof-
fice.-C. Terwilliger.
Broken Lenses accurately dupli-
Gated while you wait. Eyes exam
ined and frames fitted.-Yaeger
Optical Parlor.
So I'm cash to any person bringing
to my store a standard make watch
| cannot repair.-Guy e. Hanson.