The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1917-05-31


marriage announcement, didn't com
NIT such terribly heinous offens'
after all.
Pat and Mike were crossing the
ocean and Mike fell overheard. AS he
came to the surface he yelled "Hey
Pat, drop me line" Pat yelled back
l"What's the use, there won't be any
postoffice whore you are going"
| ~. 4 4 4
A Chinese students idea of school
ma'am:
Teachee, teachee, all day teachee,
All night, markee papers, never grow
sleepee;
No one kissee, no one huggee,
Poor old maidee! No one Lowell
You never expected to see the day
when pound of salt pork would sell
for the same price as pound of lob
ster, did you? Well, it arrived, at the
same time as that loaf of bread cost
as much as highball.
= =
While the agitation to turn all to-
bacco fields over to potato culture has
a fearful sound, at first, to smokers,
the wise ones know it won't really
make any difference until they turn
over the alfalfa and cabbage fields
to something else.
u
An inventor announces fishing
machine capable of removing call the
fish from 80 million square feet of wa
ter per minute" What does this
leave of the joy of life for the man
with hook, line and proper brands of
bait?
1t is reported that a woman who
has great many hens has hit upon a
scheme to make the biddies lay two
eggs a day. In her food ration she
has substituted coffee grounds for
corn chop and the coffee keeps them
awake six hours longer-hence the
extra egg.
Louis Swift, jr., heir to great wealth
has been detailed to assist negro
army cook. Another plute, golfer
of note, is driving a two-mule gar
bage cart. War is truly a great lev
eler. Let us hope it brings others up
as far as it has taken these young
men down.
Modern Battle Cry for the Garden
Club: "We'll rally round the hoe,
boys, and join the ranks of toll, shout
ing the battle cry of "Feed 'emp'Well
rain the crops to grow, boys, as tillers
If the soil, shouting the battle cry
If "Feed 'em!" Where there is work
% do, boys, we'll gather on the spot,
houting the battle cry of "Feed 'em!"
70 duty We'll be true, boys, and till
he vacant lot, shouting the battle cry
f "Feed 'em!" Nature, kind mater,
will aid in our need. Down with the
alter; up with the weed! So We'll
ally round the hoe, boys, and train
he crops to grow, shouting the battle
ny of "Feed 'eml"
A young lady reader sends The In
ex man this consoling story: An
'klahoma editor tells of an old In
ian that came into his office to sub n
cribe for the paper. The editor took
ne money, then the Indian wanted
receipt. The editor tried to talk II
i'm out of it, but Mr.. Indian insisted II
n getting the receipt. After making II
the editor wanted to know why he H
as so persistent about wanting a Ii
sceipt. The Indian said: "Me die II
,me time. Go to big gate and Saint H
eter ask if | been good Indian. 1 H
~ yes. He say, did you pay editor H
" paper? say yes. He say, where II
receipt? | no have it. have to H
IN all over hell to find you and get H
,ceiptl" H
Ihere is only one good way TO clean II
,ur desk of old letters. That is
IMPLY to take out each drawer in H
S turn and turn it upside down over II
e wastebasket, without regard to II
neither there is anything valuable II
the contents. There isn't anything II
Iluable there, or you wouldn't have H
st it among the old letters in the H
st place. Furthermore, if you be- H
n rereading letters, you will devote H
If day to it before you know it, H
ID you'll wind up with almost as
rdensome an accumulation as you H
arted with. And you know before
u start that the letters you'd like
keep are the ones you dare not
ep, especially if you're married
throw them all away at once. 1t II
II set an admirable example to your II
fe, who has an attic full of the H
me grade of junk. H