davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1917-08-11
SEEN ON THE SIDE
~ HENRY EDWARD MARINER
yShcn.


When your carburetor's leaking and your Diff
ferentials crack.
When your clutch starts in to slipping and your
fan bolts working slack,
When your batteries show five thousand and
your radiator drips.
And you get dry profaninE that you have
to bite your lips;
When your spark plugs all shorting and
your piston rings go bling!
When your floating axlo breaks, and something's
wrong with everything
Then you view your concrcte-mixer with a
flavor of remorse,
And You kind O. half way wish you had invested
In horse!
When your fake upholstery fails you, when
your top drops on the side.
When your springs squeak raucous protest every
time you go to ride.
When your spark connection leaves you and
you burn a bearing out
Then you sit and contemplate things with a
sense of gnawng doubt!
When your generator dies, or when your starter
won't perform.
It's enough to make fellows Indignation kind
O warm!
And he sits him by the roadsde-victim of
Fate's ridicule-
And compares his baking jitney to a stubborn
Georgia mule!
But when everything is working-say, good
people do you know
There Is nothing like tho feeling when your
wagons fit to go!
Up the hills and down the valleys, In and out
the pcrfumed wood.
launching by q cozy springhouse-honest, fel.
low, 1t is good!
Wings that bear you far and swiftly while your
engine sings a song
That is soothing. that Is smoothing. bear you
silently along:
And, say, when things working-no re-
grets and remorscs-
Why. I wouldn't give my spare wheel for a
stableful of horses!
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1917-08-11
Health Talks, by Dr.. Vim. Brady
wright 1916. National Newspaper Service)
Doing 1t to the Least.

With all the preparedness movement and the
universal desire of our people to do their bit
for the good OF the country. II seems rather
anomalous. ever embarrassing, that as vet there
has been general effort to train American
young women in the intelligent care Of babies
Too large a percentage of American woma nhood
appears to look upon babies encumbrance
a home childlcss by intention Is a depIorabIs
institution. of which the nation has no reason
to be proud.
There Is much Ignorance of tho rudiments
OF child care among our potential future moth
crs that 1t is no wonder the mother instinct Ia
weak. and no wonder many young couples
have such fine furniture Couples day are so
Internally proud that they feel they must start
housekeeping with an equipment about 100 per
cent better and more expensive tnan their good
parents had after twenty years of married life
This is sad tendency Of the times-and It
seems that everything Is done to encourage IT,
a very few progressive public schools are
making a preliminary effort to instruct girls
OF thirteen or older in the proper care Of babies
Even 80. few parents arc steepcd in pru-
school managers against the innovation on
tho ground that the knowledge 80 Unmarried
is undesirable for young women!
All over the country st-aid classes are re-
Of minor Ills and accidents and thousa nds Of
girls and women are eagorly availing them-
selves OF the opportunity to acquire little
useful knowledge from the medical lectures
learning how to deal with of Group or
convulsions or hemorrhage until medical MD
can be summoned.
There is a real need for general education Of
Rcrvation of human lifc In infancy is DcrhnDs
the greatest field OF philanthropic endoavor n
young woman can choose to-day. because It
tho responsible women of the community con-
slider this need and inutitute some country wide
movement looking toward tho universal educa-
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1917-08-11
Panic and Greed in Food Prices

n the war approaches nearer and nearer
to the stomachs of the American people,
the nearer approaches a revolution in their
whole character and manner of living The
change knows neither wealth nor poverty
neither the middle nor the ends of society
1t is striking at the very heart of all economic
life, but just what is to be the extent of this
revolution, no knows.
1t is just as much feature Of this war as
tho lighting on the battle field ITSELF 1t is
true the war was prefaced by rising food
prices and by the prohibition of the liquor
traffic. but the war has put great punch and
flight in both these movements and never
ala such panic and greed rule the market
that supplies the human stomach as now.
In the hotels and restaurants of the cities
and towns of America there Is steady re-
duction in the quantity of food served on
the tables. On the other hand there is an
equally steady advance In the price Of every
ounce or food served. Governor Edge, OF
New Jersey. showed in a comprehensive
analysis last week how the advance in cost
had conc up as the quantity dwindled, more
especially since the government began its
campaign for increasing food production
The big hotel associations of the country
have further radically curtailed the amount
OF bread and butter served. This feature OF
the menu could we'll stand further reduction.
But there has been added to this curtailment
The withdrawal of meat has not reduced the
expenses Of these days, but raised the cost
OF other items on the menu
Every person who dimes at hotel or
lunches at restaurant has presented to him
revelation in the amount of his bill and
the vacant feeling in his stomach. It has
set him to thinking thoughts he never had
before whatever may be the contents of his
purse. This rise in the prices of food and
l ut fha
duo moro to panic than to greed of hotel and
restaurant keepers. Wine and beer have not
only disappeared from the table in prohibit
tion States but in States where they are still
soio' there Is said to be sweeping reduc-
ton In the consumption Of these beverages
Tho great hotel population of America is
beginning to turn its eyes again towards
homes OF its own and the simple life. The
goa or luxury In this country for the first
t'me Is being hit hard and il the war keens
up many new things will be learned in tho
kitchen and dining-room
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1917-08-11
To the R,chmond Grays.
For The Times-Disnatch

For The Times Dispatch.
Ye Richmond Grays. go forth to war,
Your heads held firm and high;
A sturdy band Of volunteers,
Ready to do and die
Virsinia's sons. four hundred strong.
You leave for an unknown goal;
Then go, with cheerful hearts and true
All clean in mind and soul.
Your womankind, with smiles ana tears
Now send you off to fight,
To help the allies and the war.
To battle for the right.
To our bright flag, our starry nag.
And all 1t means. be true;
Never let it bite the dust
IT'S Libertys gift to you. "a"
And when at last. from Europe's shore.
When God shall end this strife.
with honor and glory como home. come
home.
To mother. sweetheart and wife
UNA 'HENRIco.- hs'
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1917-08-11
SIX BELGIANS ARRESTED
Charged With Smuggling Rubber and
Platinum Into Ger

NEW YORK, August 11.-Six mem
oers or a Belgian relief ship crew
were arrested hero to-day with three
other men on charges OF smuggling
rubber and platinum into Germany by
way OF Holland and Belgium.
All OF the prisoners are said to DO
Belgian citizens. and their arrest, the
police said. Is the elimination of a
years search for the underground route
by which. 1t is believed. Germany has
been able to get weekly an cstima ted
$4,000 to $4,000 worth of merchandise
surreptitiously from Atlantic ports OF
this country. The value of the goods
In Germany Is said to be fve-fold their
cost here.
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1917-08-11

The Germans have added another 'incredi-
BILE crime" to their record Of murder and
demonism in this war. When U-boat sank
the Belgian Prince, the submarine comman-
der after destroying the lifeboats and de-
prving thirty-eight of the crew of their life
belts. placed them on the deck of his boat.
Then he submerged his submarine, sweeping
these thirty-eight sailors into the sea and
drowning them. These men were deliberate
iy murdered. Even the most fiendish pirates
In history never quite descended to such
depths of infamy as that.
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1917-08-11

If the Republicans OF Virginia have any
idea that the differences of opinion among
Democrats in the recent primary campaign
afford them any hope of capturing the State,
they must be allowing their hopes to destroy
their recollection of Virginia political his
tory. There have been animated campaigns
before in Democratic State primaries, but
after the family affairs were settled the party
was invariably found united against the an
cient enemy,
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1917-08-11
II. Gillian. Majority s.e.

To tho Editor Of The Times Dispatch:
Sir.-In your list OF those receiving
the Democratic nomination In tho pri-
mary on yesterday for membership in
tho House Of Delegates OF Virginia.
Rodgers, from the city OF Petersburg,
when. as matter OF fact. the under
signed, Robert Gillian, Jr., was the
successful candidate for this nomina-
ton, having carried every ward in
this city and received a majority over
Dir. Rodgers OF 526 votes out OF 1908
cast. r GILLIAN IN
August 8, 1917.
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1917-08-11

ing the nations hand for prosecuting the war
successfully. The provision in the food con-
troll bill directing the President to expend
$10.000,0o0 for the purchase OF nitrates for
fertilizer and sell at cost to the farmers. will
be of material benefit in the way Of meeting
their requirements for enrichment OF the
soil, thereby stimulating larger Yields
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1917-08-11

mo American commission to Russia has
returned with the news that naturalizcd Rus
sian Americans who had gone back tn Russt,
since America entered the war were largely
responsible for the present chaos in Russia.
Nearly all these men ar. Socialists, and Ger
many has made 1t point to cultivate tho
socialists in America and send them to Eu
rope as her propagandists. The Russian
american Socialists have represented to tho
russian people that the Washington govern
men. is moro despotic than tho late govern
ment OF the Gear, and that America entered
tho war to make money. Such misrenrcson-
tations cannot be wondered at when the brand
or socialism this country fosters and pro-
duces Is put on examination. With compara-
lively few exceptions the American Socialist
has nothing of tho moral standing among bis
fellows that tho French, Russian. English or
the German Socialist has
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1917-08-11

Was it not Robert Louis Stevenson who
said "To travel hopefully is better than to
arrive? Candidates who have been travel
ing hopefully for some months without hav-
ing arrived may perchance find some conso-
lation in the words Of the beloved philoso-
pher, and certainly no one would wish to de-
priye them of any consultations to which they
are entitled.
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1917-08-11
information Bureau

Inquiries regarding almost any topic.
excepting on leEnl and medical sub
Quiries nre answered directly by per-
soual letter, n 2-cent stamp In required
for return postage. Address The Times-
Dispatch Information Bureau, Itch
nond. Va.
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1917-08-11

Secretary OF Agriculture Houston an
nounces as the agricultural war plan for tho
nation the urgent necessity of an increase
of the acreage that should be planted this
fall to winter wheat Of 47,337 900 acres and
OF 5,131,0O acres to rye This record
winter wheat acreage, an increase of Is per
cent over last year, it is estimated would
yield 672, 900 900 bushels If the average yield
for the past ten years is equaled or under
tho favorable conditions Of 1914, would give
$50, 900 bushels. With expected spring
increase it is estimated that the nation will
have~at least 1000. o00.0oo bushels of wheat
for dom este use and export. This increased
production is urged as absolutely essential to
prevent a serious shortage OF breadstuns next
summer. While the planting and cultivation
Z OF these increased acreages OF fall-grown
grains call for unusual efforts on the part
OF the farmers, their response to the appeal
may be confidently counted upon. as the
farmer class has abundantly demonstrated its
patriotism in a willingness to adopt every
intelligent means suggested for strengthen
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1917-08-11

G. o. II, Chinaport-Blue laws Is a
term that was applied to certain early
statutes of n puritanical nature passed
In Connecticut In the latter part of the
seventeenth century. The name Is now
frequently applied to restrictive stat
uteS that prevent Sunday activity.
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1917-08-11
HydropInnc and Hydroncroplane.

l. +: K. Richmond The two words
refer to different kinds of craft a
hydroplane is fast motorboat trav-
cling on the water only; n hydroaero-
plane goes on the water or i'm the air.
when the speed becomes sufficiently
great.
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1917-08-11
Burnley Amounted.

w. Sam Burnley. Il clerk in the office
OF the Auditor OF Public Accounts, was
appointed yesterday by tho State Cor
poration Commission as clerk in the
banking division, to succeed w b.
Christian, who resigned several weeks
ago.
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1917-08-11
Questions and Answers.

aroaseds Who viii rise with the answeS? mus
Questions and Answers.
,S Should S the Baby Fat Ra9nnasrour txoyear-
n vcritable Indian war song every timo he sees
children. They seem to agree with him. Am
WRONG in giving them to hm7 When he was
tho doctors said. but he tells me this is now
Answer.-Provided the bananas are turning
through and the portion-tho fobrous
part--pared off, | see no reason why boy of
two two years ,n should not eat them Possibly they
bananas chiefly fruit sugar, anyway and
baby's natural food is moro than halt sugar.
Organic Error Again Crops up.--I am nervous
and oyspeptic and have considerable palpitation
and shortncss OF breath when / walk or exert
myself ny ms in climbing flight of stairs. Have
forty years old, and have never taken
much care of myself use to drink considerably
Eanically sound. Can you suggest anything
:. Answcr,-Yes. sir. You are far from -: sound.
your organs were sound you would not be nj
That functional" and organic idea is Just
small talk the doctor uses to evade the Issue:
ton. including blood test Chemical and
mlcroscopical urine ANALYSIS. blood-prcssure
That may disclose tho nature OF your disease
Rubber and Fish,. Does tho wearing of
rubber ;soled shoes have any i'll effect upon
health? .. Does the wearing Of rubber heals
protect the nervous system from injury by lars?
s. Does the eating Of fish cause rheumatism!
Answer. No .. Rubber soles or heels are
OF no particular significance. excepting az a
do not eat enough fish. especially sea fish
winch would be good substitute for meat.
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1917-08-11
UNTITLED STEEL ORDERS
Report for July 81 shows Decrcase O.,
Ss9.1:3 Tons From Orders
on June 40

NEW YORK. August 1.-THE untitled
orders Of the United States Steel Cor
poration on July 81 were lo.S44,l64
tons. according to the monthly report
issued to-day. This Is a decrease OF
53s.l23 tons from the orders on June 80
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1917-08-11
no Increase the Wool suppl1.

To Increase the Wool Supply.
Mary has a little lamb,
But ought to have anotheri
And every lamb that Mary has
Must sure to be mother.
Mary must increase her lambs
In war tirle 'twould behoove her
To have a dozen-ycs, a gross
To please our Mr.. Hoover. w c.
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1917-08-11

g. C. w. Gordonsville.-The reason
for only a part OF the moons disc
being visible to the earth is that the
east and west sides become alternately
visible; this Is called the moons longi-
tudinal libration. The filtration In lati-
tude arises from the moons axis not
consequence of which a part of her
surface round the North Pole Is visible
during one-half and a corresponding
portion round the South Pole during
the other half of her revolution In her
orbit: the libration In latitude is about
degrees, II minutes.
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1917-08-11
1t Threatened.

1t Threatened.
1t threatened to rain to-day,
And then 1t didn't do it;
1t threatened to crack a cloud,
But there was nothing to 1t,
The banks of black piled in the sky,
And then the threatened rain passed by.
The moral that I deduce:
This world is full Of furry,
or fretting and fuss and muss,
And every kind Of worry.
And most of all our troubles due
To things that only threaten to-
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1917-08-11
Voice of the People

Letters must give tho name and I'd.
dress of tho writer. Namo will not bs
published II writer so requests.
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1917-08-11
James Russell Lowell.

c. 4. T.. Clarksville.-Jamcs Russell
Lowell never held Cabinet position
but was United States Minister to
Spain. lS77-1SSo. and to Great Britain,
1SS0-lSS5.
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1917-08-11

tion OF our girls in this vital mattery Every
village and city offers plenty OF material for
the tho work Of girls who know how to wash.
Is II baby so nsiEui1cant? Is tho mother in
stinct so dormant that 1t cannot be thus
aroused? Who will rise with the answer?
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1917-08-11
Charcoal Eph'. Daily Thought.

Hits jess lax men t. take credit I'm de
wimmen folks" said Charcoal Eph. ruminative-
~ Every time a hen staht t cackle.
OF fool rooster bus out CROWN he haid off,
Try some pickles, Mistah Jackson"
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1917-08-11
Limerick.

A sweet thing who lived in Duquesne
Had face SO exceedingly plesne
That she painted It so
That she didn't dare go
Very far from her home fearing resne.
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1917-08-11

Holland and Norway offer ships for food
but aren't ships indigestible?
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1917-08-11

korniloff succeeds Brussiloff. AS far as wo
can see, they arc both off.
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1917-08-11

Miss Rankin scored the copper magnates
Copper-heads never were popular.
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1917-08-11

MISS Rankin thinks the politicians are CON-
spring against her. The horrid old thine,
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1917-08-11
St,inE:

StunE:
Mary. was looking through my old vest
and what do you think found in the pockets?'
John Henry. gimme 1t right now; you gotta
gimme it. I get all that's found In the old
pockets.
"Rghto! Here 1t is-its hole-nend r."
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1917-08-11

He. having very little to say
Remarked to her: do you crochet"
She. with her gilt of ready wit,
Smiled broad smile and answered.: Knit
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1917-08-11

Miss Jeanette Rankins record in Congress
thus far does not very much encourage the
idea of filling mems places in that body with
women. She began by voting against the
resolution to declare war Germany, and
her first set speech delivered the other day
was defense OF. the lawlessness Of the /.
W. w. She was moved to make this speech
because of the lynching Of Little, the I. W.
W. leader, lawlcssness fighting awlessness
In these exhibits Miss Rankin's heart proved
to be too representative to know all sides
OF human nature, knowledge that is de-
manded of statcswoman as we'll as OF a
statesman. Her defense of the I. w. W.
will only tend to encourage that organiza-
ton to do more mischief.
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1917-08-11
Frontier.

Frontier.
Say. whatre they gon' { do with tn fellow
that stole Buck Stles's horse?"
Why they at first said they'd make him nav
loF In morse an keep 1t, but calmer judgment
prevailed. an they're just goin t hang hjm"
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1917-08-11
Scrapbook Stun.

Don't know who invented tits old-but
here II is. You read 1t tho same forward
or backward: Raw was I ere saw war"
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1917-08-11
Interpreted.

Doctor tell me something: what is meant in
the Bible by The first shall be last'?"
well. dunno unless maybe 1t means that
a doctor is the first man called and the last
paid"
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1917-08-11
nay of the Dupc..

p. c. F., Richmond.-The day Of the
dupes" was term often applied to
signal triumph achieved by Cardinal
Richelieu over his enemies on that day.
Maria de Medici. the mother of Louis
hating Richelieu. prevailed upon the
King to dismiss his "Insolent minister"
from the council. When next day the
in his hands the seal Of office. Louis
relented. refused to accent his resig-
nation, and made him more powerful
than over. The courtiers who had
flocked to tho residence OF the Queen.
mother at tho Luxembourg for mutual
congratulations were utterly confound-
ed; while the headsmans AK was long
KEEP. busy before the cardinals venge-
ancA iWa6 stated.
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1917-08-11

Senator Lewis conhded TO the President
that he expected Congress to adjourn on
September l. Mr.. Wilson in after years in
writing Of the few happiest moments of his
life while President. cannot overlook his
emotions when he learned the first session
Of the Sixtyffth Congress had adjourned
It may be said with due seriousness that no
set of men in this country has done more
to encourage slackers draft riots, outbreaks
villainous German-American and Irsh-Ameri-
can abuse of the government and German
persistence in the war than the La Follettes,
Gronnas, Reeds, Cores Hardwicks, Stones
and VardamanS in the Senate and the Nc
IGNORES and Manns in tho House. These
men have done their level best to hamstring
the country's preparation for war. They
have illuminated no discussions in which
they have taken part. The philosophy OF
most OF them is false, selfish cgotistc
humanitariansm, which they have employed
to keep themselves in the center of a stage
where they could not otherwise play These
men. with the plea of trying to prevent the
President from becoming 4 dictator, have
themselves become dictators.
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1917-08-11
Entente.

S. II. F.. Petersburg-On-ta unt is
about as nearly the correct pronunci-
alton as can be indicated here The
word is French. and signifies meaning.
or intention. The Entente Powers at
first were Russia, France and Great
Britain only. They were so called be-
cause they had reached n general I'M
derstanding, not amounting to a treaty
OF alliance. to support each other n
matters should take such n turn. as
they did take in 1914. This under
standing was known as .TEntente
Cordial" The meaning will be con-
veyed clearly II we translate 1t "thc
cordial understanding"
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1917-08-11
Exactly.
Wartime Repartee.

The new doctor complains that he has to
have more patience than patients.
Richmond times-dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1914-current, 1917-08-11
Lcft-Handcd
Guns
for Soldiers

~, TIC IeSSman
taken the matter UP with the War Department
ana learned that "a large number OF left
1etthhnded tendencies! Seriously. there
slackers who wish to escape the draft as there
are ar slackers In number. The frankest of these
reported to have made personal visit to the
t Wnite house at washington and lodged a plea
big coward to fght.-Chrstian Science Moni.
S'~N'NS "ANtiA0