The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1917-11-05
LETTERS OF
TWO WOMEN
From May Bond, Wife, to Kate Os-
way, Business Girl.
BY ZOE BECKLEY.


Kerryville, Kan, July 20.
Kate, My Dear:
1 am almost as distressed over this
harassing love affair of yours as tho
it were my own-not that haven't
troubles of my own, too, Kitsie, but
We'll dissect those later. Let me hurry
and give you some advice that seems
sound to me. OF course, people rare
~ take advice, and I don't insist that
you swallow mine, willy-nilly. But it
may possibly clear up a point or two
thai you seem cloudy on.
You say you see mo way out; that
to throw over c. J. for this other man
would be to commit murder"
Nonsense and tommyroti Men
them, my friend but not for love
No man yet has been murdered by
jilting. Men die occasionally. or COM
NIT that act of cowardice called sui
eide after disappointment in love. But
it is their weakness and not the lost
love that is to blame.
Where is your common sense, Kate 4?
Where is your copy of Ellen Key? 1
can't remember the exact words but
somewhere in Love and Marriage"
Ellen points out that the race not
only needs people who are willing to
lose their lives in order to make the
world better, but people with courage
enough to sacrifice others for the de-
velopment of themselves. In other
words, dear, the thing to do is the
thing that will put the most good into
life. The thing that has the most val
ue to the most people.
Now. if you love Paul Danssef, and
feel convinced that marriage to him
will make your life fuller, better, more
useful to yourself and others than it
could be otherwise, then it is your
duty to marry him, no matter what
it costs c. J.
You say Two people cannot build
happiness upon another's heartbreak"
You are absolutely wrong. They can.
You might as we'll say it is wrong to
build house because you must kill
a million little bugs and worms and
destroy their homes in order to build
1t. Or course you must. Everything
involves the destruction of something
else. Why. think of the people who
even justify war with all its hideous
numbering and destruction on the
ground that something good comes
of it.
No, Katie. darling. you are wrong
an FEELING that you must turn your
back on this marriage because of your
obligation to c. Us happiness.
Besides I do not even admit that
the sacrifice would be for his happi-
ness. 1t might save him suffering.
But it is like an operation or a siege
at the ist's-horribly painful, but
lot better for your health once it's
over.
Mark my words: C. J. will be bet
ter off in the end if you cut the tie
between you with a clean stroke. He
has so long depended upon your af-
lection and friendship that he forgets
the injustice it is to you. He loses
nothing and gains everything. You
gain nothing and lose everything For
you are neither engaged definitely TO
him nor are you free. And this silly.
profitless affair might go on for
twenty years. weakening you both and
getting you nowhere
No. Kate, have courage to live your
life and make him live his in strength
and uprightness. Ellen Key says.
Every individual must serve the
community according to his own
choice and upon his own responsible
ity- One helps thru happiness and
love as well as thru self-sacrIfice."
To come down to words of one
syllable. never worry too much about
the man you do not marry Hen
get along all right. A man has a
Thousand ways of nending his heart
Love isn't everything to a man It's
mighty near everything to a woman.
I'm glad in a way. to be sharing
your love troubles IT keeps me from
worrying too much about my own,
Ever thine. MAY