The Lakeland evening telegram., 1917-01-24
He Considered
Himself Smart
By BARBARA PHIPPS

1 was talkin' with Mandy Simmons
t'other day. was tellin' her about my
crops, Just how much wheat I'd TUX
in, how much corn and produce. and
ended up by confidin' to her that I'd
put In the bank more'n $500 over and
above expenses, livin' and all that
Mandy's a nice gal wouldn't "a told
anybody else what told her. 1t SEEM
ed like was tellin' 1t to myself.
"Land sakes. Mr.. Barnickel." said
Mandy, "how tight you do stick to
yer farm and yer crops and the money
yer putin In the bank! Amt y ever
goin' to think about gettin' married
! and havin' some one to leave all yer
| fortune to when y die?"
Somehow I'd never thought O. that
I'd felt lonesome-like evenin's now and
then, and when I'd had a stroke O.
luck l felt kind alike tellin' some un
about 1t. That's the reason why tole
Mandy how much profit I'd made
| durin' last season. / says to Mandy
when she talked about my gettin' some
un to leave my earnin's to, says /:
81 dunno any gal as would have me,
and a man can't marry unless he's got
gal"
"Why, Mr.. Barnickel," says Mandy,
Il don't reckon you'd have any trouble
on that score. l was standin lookin'
at gal t'other day, and she said some
pin to me. l couldn't hear what 1t
was, but somehow / reckoned it was
about you l asked her to write it
{, down, and she did. What do you
s'pose it was?"
II dunno"
"It was 4 wish Jeb Barnickel would
| propose to me-"
l was tux fat aback. l didn't know
any gal that had even looked at me
that away. / asked Mandy who the
gal was, but she wouldn't tell me.
She chuckled and said / might ask
her three questions, to which she
would answer truthfully, provided I
didn't ask the gals name. l began
by askin' her where she was when
she was talkin' to the gal, and she
said she was In the livin' room at
home. Then / asked her why she
couldn't hear what the gal said, and
she answered that there was glass be-
tween her and the other gal.
"Oh," says, "she was standin' out
on the porch or In the yard, and the
| winder was shut down."
Mandy didn't say nothin' to this, but
i ch 1ov vfo 20 lyil .l- \
her two questions and had one more
to ask. The only thing ! could think
of for this last question was, where
was the gal when she writ down what
you said she did?" l asked her this,
and she said the gal was In the same
room with her.
II don't want her." says |.
"Why not?" asked Mandy, serious
like.
"'Cause she must be deaf and
dumb"
With that, Mandy like to split her
sides larf1n'. didn't like bein' made
fun Of that Away, and l looked it.
With that, Mandy looked sorry and
sidled up to me and cuddled me a lit
tie, and she says, says she:
"Mr. Barnickel. 1t wouldn't be right
for me to give gal away like that.
But I'll tell you what Ill do. She
often comes to see me Saturday even
ms. If you'd care to drop in some
Saturday evenin' If she comes in, you'll
see her."
i ssTho 30 fo,rv seysI UJ,I, ,c,,,o xoxt
Saturday. How will I know when a
gal comes in she's the gal that was
talkin' to your"
"Oh, I'll put you on" says Mandy.
and with that she went away, with a
spark in her eye and a smile on her
lips. She looked SO pretty that kinda
wished she snd l was keepin' house
together and there wasn't any other
gal had anything to do with it.
Saturday night l put on my store
clothes and a boiled shirt and went
round to Mandy's. She seemed glad to
see me, but she said she didn't reckon
the gal 1 wanted to see would drop in
She sat by me on the sofy and tole me
that IL had anything on my mind l
felt like gittin' Off l was welcome to
do It.
Facin' the sofy was an old fashioned
desk or library or suthin with a look
in glass on it. We could see ourselves
in the glass. asked Mandy what part
O. the room she was in when the gal
said what she did to her. Mandy said
she was sittin' on the sofy.
Il thort the gal was outside" says l.
IF you was sittin' on the sofy you
couldn't see any one outside"
Mandy chuckled.
"You couldn't see nobody onless Y
saw yerself In the lookin' glass yon-
der"
Mandy didn't say nothin' to this; she
looked down at her knees and smooth
ed her dress with her hands.
do v think the garll drop In to-
nightf" says 1.
4 Il dunno" says Mandy.
"Well," says. II don't keer whether
she does or not. I'm mighty well salts