Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1917-01-12

parent and two shoes and who had
just taken his seat in congress In firm,
resounding tones. It's all excessively
interesting to me aud would be. even
II any of the facts mentioned were
trne. For | know Monty Barnes; I've
known him for years-ever since the
time we sat in the literary society to-
gether at Siwash college and Monty
used to get up and make speeches with
voice that sounded like a dried leaf
In wash boiler.
remember Monty's first speech as
plainly as If had heard it. can re-
peat IL word for word. lie said: "M-mr.
Ch-charman, IL n-murn we adj
3OOve." He was holding on TO two
chairs when he made 1t. Told me
afterward that ne stopped them as
they were going around him and used
them as substitutes for knees. He was
the shyeSt man and the worst speaker
who ever got into the Gnothautli Lit
erary society. He had sat for a year
before he dared make the above speech.
And it took him another year to get
so fluent that he could address the So
ciety with the aid of only one chair.
] remember how we used to look for
ward to the nights when Monty ran
the society. AS a chairman he remind
ed me of puny child trying to herd
wildcats. You could chase him into
the rafters with point of order and
paralyZe him for a whole evening with
an amendment to an amendment.
Monty was so meek when we took
him in that he had to have a written
permission to sneeze in chapel. | used
TO watch him trying to arrange his
knees when he wanted to speak. You
know how important 1t is that your
knees shall be in good voice when you
want to address a meeting. Time after
time he would get part way up with a
few remarks balanced on the end of
his tongue and then his knees would
balk and insurge. and by the time he
had braced them up he had mislaid his
remarks and the meeting had surged
on. ! used to pity him, though good
ness knows | wouldn't have gotten up
at that time for the world. was worse
fhAn he hut ! was resigned to it.
remember. too. the night when Barnes
suddenly found himself sailing along
about one thousand miles above sea
level, riding his train of thought and
feeding new thoughts into his mind
as fast as he emptied it. | can see
now the look of ecstasy OF his face
the look of man who has just discov-
cred how TO drive an airplane and ride
the gale on an even keel. From that
time on you couldn't head Barnes off.
lie became society nuisance He de-
bated and GRATED and remarked at
every meeting, and it was O common
thing for some member to rise in the
middle of his eloquence and say.
MIR. Chairman, ! think It is about
time to cap the gas we'll"
And now little Barnes is in congress
It's two years since he hung out his
law single. I'll bet he started politi-
cal speaking before he got his sign
painted. and I'll bet they couldn't stop
him. either, until he had said what he
wanted TO. I'd like to have heard his
campaign. I'd like to have seen the
surprise Of some of the tough old poli-
ncians who rose up to smother him
with scorn and got banged on the head
with the unabridged dictionary. And
Ill bet congress doesn't worry him
either He's had Gnothautii training
Monty has, and no measly speaker Is
going to head him off when he has q
face full of words.
That's what old Gnothautii did for
Monty. 1t did lot for all of us, too.
There is nothing In college that can
touch the literary society for teaching
man to get up and slam q few choice,
hand-picked sentiments into the other
fellow at minutes warming. Looking
back on those society nights cannot
feel surprised at the large number of
awkward youngsters who afterward
went out and began bOsslng cong, es-
SiOnal districts before they could raise
mustaches. After a man has spent q
few years baling up and delivering his
ideas In the face of parliamentary OBJ
1ections, whoops, yells, sarcasm and
sometimes furniture, a little thing like
hypnotizing a well-pollced ward caucus
is only child's play for him. They were
80 fatally critical in our society. You
could talk to 1t as long as you inter-
ested 1t and no longer. And the mem.
bers were so pleasantly frank about
your little faults of speaking. You
didn't have to guess at those faults
oh. no. AT the end of TIE meeting the
critic got up and told the society about
them. He made his meaning perfectly
plain. We always took cure to choose
a critic who had good command of
language.
Literary society night was a great
feature at old Siwash. Friday and SAT-
urday nights we frivoled and on Sun.
day nights we studied Monday, Tues