davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Northern Wisconsin advertiser. [volume] (Wabeno, Wis.) 1898-1925, 1917-05-25
KNEW WHERE TO FIND CROWD
Where Horse Had Fallen Upon
the Pavement.

1t was a dull day in the bureau of
city disturbances. Chief WazZle
yawned twice and scratched his chin.
Then he scratched his chin twice and
yawned. Then he yawned once and a
half and scratched his chin once and
a half, and at that moment the tele-
phone bell rang.
"Ah," said the chief, relievedly.
Maybe it's a riot or somepn."
"Chief of the bureau of disturb
ances?" asked brisk voice at the other
end of the wire.
''Him." replied Chief Wazzle.
swell, can you tell me whether a
horse has happened to fall on any of
the city streets during the past few
minutes, and if so, where's?
Corner Zed and Blug streets, twelve
minutes ago." said the chief, after con-
sulting a ledger marked Horse down"
Five minutes later a young man
jumped from a taxi at the corner of
Zed and Blug streets. Hah! The
horse was still down, and, naturally,
a great crowd surrounded the pros
trate quadruped. Mullen Void, the
worlds liveliest press agent-for it was
he-dived into the middle of the throng
(first crowd he had caught that day.,
and distributed notices of the coming
debut of Mile. Tattle, the fish-faced
woman, to Wickenthrow's dime mu-
seum.-Detroit Free Press.
Northern Wisconsin advertiser. [volume] (Wabeno, Wis.) 1898-1925, 1917-05-25
Making Sure.

Henry" she began, in a sweet, tim
orous voice, whats all this talk
about gold and silver?'
Henry, who reads the papers, and
was about as thoroughly ignorant on
the subject as everybody else, plunged
in bravely, but she stopped him.
II don't want to know that" she fall
tered, "but is gold getting so awful
scarce?"
awful scarce" echoed Henry, dis
mally.
"And is it all being taken away to
pay for the WARP"
''It is" said Henry.
'And if they continue to take it
away, there won't be any left in this
country by and by, and Wen have to
use silver?''
YES" sighed Henry.
Henry" she whispered, 81 told you
I would give you my decision in the
summer-but / repent. lit is "
yes Henry. DOn't-dOn't you think"
she continued, after a moments 81
lence, that it would be we'll to get the
ring now, before all the gold is taken
away ?"--London Tit-Bits.
Northern Wisconsin advertiser. [volume] (Wabeno, Wis.) 1898-1925, 1917-05-25
To Dynamite a Stream.

The editor of Jersey newspaper,
a thorough sportsman, is said to have
received this query from a reader:
please advise me how to dynamite
a stream"
The newspaper man sent the follow
ing advice:
-Four sticks of dynamite are suffi-
cient. Tie them securely around your
neck, attach fuse, light it and run as
fast as you can away from the water
to avoid injuring the other snakes and
reptiles. All Outdoors.
Northern Wisconsin advertiser. [volume] (Wabeno, Wis.) 1898-1925, 1917-05-25
An Effective Plea.

what do you mean by begging from
door to door when your country needs
such husky fellows as your" asked the
patriotic person, indignantly.
1--WE walked sixty miles ter en-
list, guv'nOr," answered the tramp.
''Dis is de las lap of the journey, an /
fought under de circumstances you
wouldn't mind givin' me a handout."
Certainly not. Step around to the
kitchen and I'll have the cook fix you
up good breakfast"
Northern Wisconsin advertiser. [volume] (Wabeno, Wis.) 1898-1925, 1917-05-25
YES! LIFT A CORN
OFF WITHOUT PAIN!
Cincinnati man tells how to dry
UP a corn or caIlus so it lifts
off with fingers.

You corn-pestered men and women
need suffer no longer. Wear the shoes
that nearly killed you before, says this
Cincinnati authority, because a few
drops of freezone applied directly on a
tender, aching corn or callus, stops
soreness at once and soon the corn or
hardened callus loosens so it can be
lifted off, root and all, without pain.
A small bottle of freezone costs very
little at any drug store, but will posi-
lively take off every hard or soft corn
or callus. This should be tried, as it
is inexpensive and is said not to irri-
tate the surrounding skin.
If your druggist hasn't any freezone
tell him to get a small bottle for you
from his wholesale drug house.-adv.
Northern Wisconsin advertiser. [volume] (Wabeno, Wis.) 1898-1925, 1917-05-25
Possible ADVANTAGE.

Wederly-Can the girl you are en-
gagged to marry swim?
Singleton-Really don't know. But
why do you ask?
Wederly-Because if she can you
ought TO be happy. Any girl who can
swim knows how TO keep her mouth
shut.
Northern Wisconsin advertiser. [volume] (Wabeno, Wis.) 1898-1925, 1917-05-25
Present Times.

Willis--Bump is going to clean up
a bunch Of money this year.
ellis pw so?
Whistle is going to tear down
that eighteen-story building that he
owns.
Gi1lis-And erect a bigger one?
Willis-Oh, no. Plant the site with
onions and potatoes.-Town Topics.
Northern Wisconsin advertiser. [volume] (Wabeno, Wis.) 1898-1925, 1917-05-25
GREEN'S AUGUST FLOWER

has been the most successful family
remedy for the last fifty-one years for
biliousness and stomach troubles. to
which the American people are addict
ed, causing sick headache, nervous in
digestion, sour stomach, coming up of
food and general physical depression.
% and 75c.-Adv.
Northern Wisconsin advertiser. [volume] (Wabeno, Wis.) 1898-1925, 1917-05-25
A Timely Gift.

Belle-Bob writes that the smoke in
the trenches is something fierce.
Beulah-Is that SO? Well, that gives
me a hint.
"a hint for what?'
81 promised to send him a birthday
present"
"Well?'
'TIl send him a smoking jacket"
Northern Wisconsin advertiser. [volume] (Wabeno, Wis.) 1898-1925, 1917-05-25
technical Talk.

"That young doctor raves about your
eyes, grille"
eyes, in medical terms. It's tritie
disconcerting."
Northern Wisconsin advertiser. [volume] (Wabeno, Wis.) 1898-1925, 1917-05-25
Druggists Customers Praise
Kidney Medicine

DR.. Kilner's Swamp-Root is tho
best seller on the market today in this
locality. l believe it is all that is claimed
and during my experience of eight years.
in handling it as kidney, liver and blad-
der remedy / have never heard singls
complaint and know that it has produced
very beneficial results in many cases, ae~
cording to the reports of my customers
who praise it highly.
Very truly yours,
HERBERT S., MAXWELL, !
Go
Northern Wisconsin advertiser. [volume] (Wabeno, Wis.) 1898-1925, 1917-05-25
Shrewd Guesser.

The Well One-The doctor now says
that his first diagnosis was correct.
The Sick One-Great ScottI Do you
mean to say that I am his first pa
tent?
Northern Wisconsin advertiser. [volume] (Wabeno, Wis.) 1898-1925, 1917-05-25

Though a man classes his wife as
turtle dove during the honeymoon he
may think later on that she resembles
a parrot.
Northern Wisconsin advertiser. [volume] (Wabeno, Wis.) 1898-1925, 1917-05-25
Physically impossible,

1.-THE engineers of those trains muse
have been off their heads to come to-
gether in such way"
mot at all. 1t was a head-on COLI
lision."
Northern Wisconsin advertiser. [volume] (Wabeno, Wis.) 1898-1925, 1917-05-25

Many a man has been convicted of
forgery because he took Solomon's adj
vice and CLOSE a good name for him
coIf
Northern Wisconsin advertiser. [volume] (Wabeno, Wis.) 1898-1925, 1917-05-25

Good resolutions are formed most
easily just before one gets up on thT
morning after the night before.
Northern Wisconsin advertiser. [volume] (Wabeno, Wis.) 1898-1925, 1917-05-25
You are Invited to Write for Free Advice.

successful in relieving womans
suffering Lydia e. Pinkhams Vegetable Compound
helpful by writing the Lydia
E. Medicine Mass Such letters received
by held in strict confidence.
Northern Wisconsin advertiser. [volume] (Wabeno, Wis.) 1898-1925, 1917-05-25
June S, 1916. Plymouth, Mass
Prove What Swamp-Root Will Do For Yew

Send ten cents to DIR. Kilmer & Coz
Binghamton, N. Y, for a sample size
bottle. 1t will convince anyone. YomI
will also receive a booklet of valuablsI
information, telling about the kidneys.
and bladder When writing, be sure and
mention this paper. Regular ffty-cens
and one-dollar size bottles for sale at an
drug stores-Adv.
Northern Wisconsin advertiser. [volume] (Wabeno, Wis.) 1898-1925, 1917-05-25

Many a man who claims to be SELF
made does his tailor a great Injustice
Northern Wisconsin advertiser. [volume] (Wabeno, Wis.) 1898-1925, 1917-05-25

You won't have to wait long If you
are looking for a chance to have your
feelings hurt.
Northern Wisconsin advertiser. [volume] (Wabeno, Wis.) 1898-1925, 1917-05-25

Blow your own horn, but blow it
with discrimination.
Northern Wisconsin advertiser. [volume] (Wabeno, Wis.) 1898-1925, 1917-05-25
Momen Of
MddkMqe
Many distressing Ailments experienced
by them are Allev;ated by Lydia E.
Pinkham's Vegetable Compound.
Here is Proof by Women who Know.

Lowell, Mass-"For the last three years have
been troubled with the Change of Life and the bad
feelings common at that time. / was In very ner-
yous condition, with headaches and pain good
deal of the time so was unfit to do my work A
friend asked me to try Lydia E. Pinkham's Vegeta-
Bile Compound, which did, and it has helped me in
every way. l am not nearly so nervous, no head
ache or pain. must say that Lydia Z. Pinkham's
Vegetable Compound is the best remedy any sick
woman can take."-Mrs MARGARET QUINN, Rear
$50 Worthen ST., Lowell, Mass.
Northern Wisconsin advertiser. [volume] (Wabeno, Wis.) 1898-1925, 1917-05-25
IfiIIIIIILAAlIiEfFi'

Friends Take Lydia E. Pinkhams Remedies
North Haven Conn-"When had the Change of Life
which trouble all have AT first didn't bother me
bearing down palms. called In doctors VINO
try things they did not pains One
day my home and sad why don't you try LYDIA
them bottles of Vegetable Compound and could
feel regainng health also used Lydia Pnkhams
sanav Wash and it has done great deal of good Any one
female troubles Change of
life te them to take remedies There about 20
of us world of Mrs. FLORENCE lsEU
Box 1877. Haven, Conn.
Northern Wisconsin advertiser. [volume] (Wabeno, Wis.) 1898-1925, 1917-05-25

Knokledge is power only so far as
it is Dracticed
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1917-09-06

when somebody else "opens 1t re-
quired some time and considerable
money to impress it on her that it
wasn't difficult to get two pair beat.
She's quit counting her 'straights'
aloud. But you can't keep her face
from looking like an electric head
light or red lantern on an excavation
whenever she gets good hand.
"She held four pat queens the
other night and she got no 'stayers-'
They'd all took a look at her face
when she opened They'd beat a
couple of good hands earlier in the
evening for her, and she wasn't over
amiable.
What's the matter?' she demand
ed, all of you got chilblains?'
"'Everybody's looking out the win
dow, honey replied.
"And," Lewis added thoughtfully,
at took the combined efforts of the
entire party to convince her that /
merely had used poker term and
not sarcasm"
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1917-09-06
TO LIVE LONG

A recipe given BY . famoqs physl-
clan for long life was: Keep tie
kidseys in good orderi Try 70 elinpi-
nate thr. the skin and intestines tie
poisoes that otherwise clog the kidneys.
Avoid eating meat a. much a. possible I:
avoid too much salt, alcohol, tea Try
. milk and vegetable diet. Drink plenty
of water. and exercise 30 you sweat
the skin helps to eliminate the toxic
poisous and uric acid"
For those past middle life, or those
easily recognized symptoms Of in6am-
nation. a. backache. scalding water"
or if uric acid in the blood has caused
rheumatism. rusty" joints. stiffness.
get Anuric at the drug store This
is > wonderful eliminator of uric acid
and was discovered by DR.. Pierce of
lnvalids Hotel, Buffalo. N. Y. If your
druggist does not keep it send 10 cents
to DIR. Pierce for trial package and you
will know that it is many times more
potent than lithia and that il dissolyes
uric acid as hot water does sugar.
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1917-09-06
IMPORTANT LETTER FROM
IDAHO WOMAN.
Moscow. Idaho.l"I have taken

have taken DIR.
Pierce's Favorite
Prescription for
woman's weak
ness. l used it
during expect
ancy to relieve
me of sick stom-
ach and back
aches. l used it
afterw ard 70
build me up and
in every case il
has always given
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1917-09-06
Binder Irvine.

We have a full supply Of binder
Irvine. 1t is of first class quality.
We advise you to call and get what
you need while it lasts.
HAWKINS HARDWARE.
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1917-09-06

me aDyoIute TeNcf.
:" was for some time troubled with
scrofula and running sores. l took two
bottles of DR.. Pierce's Golden Medical
Discovery; it purified my blood and left
my skin perfectly clear and smooth. -
Mas ]. L. GILLIE. 802 Deacon St.
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1917-09-06
Announcement.

l wish to announce to the public
that 1 am in a position to do carpen-
ter work by the day or by contract.
Estimates furnished free. Phone Sc
W.
w. H. BASYE
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1917-09-06

For a mild, easy action of the bow
els, try Doan's Regulets, = modern
laxative. 30c At all stores
The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1917-09-06

w. H. BASYE
The Morgan City daily review. (Morgan City, La.) 1916-1920, 1917-11-27
Chamber Of Commerce Represen-
tatives To Corpus Christi
Makes Report

ed as the Mayor Of Louisiana. Mayor
Behrman made an excellent address
pleading for a better understanding
between the business interests, the
people, congress and its committees.
Mayor Behrman also called the. at
tention of those who are too busy
attending to their own affairs-un-
der abnormal conditions-to give
any time to the development and
preservation of our resources, our
Nation, and its ideals.
Mr.. J. S. Cullinan followed Mayor
Behrman with an address on ''pork"
His address was very instructive and
his explanation of a vast array of
statistics was made very clear. He
explained with the assistance of a
chart, the small amount of funds
that had been appropriated for Riv-
ers and Harbors improvement as
compared to the amount expended
for the army, navy and the colossal
pension fund. Mr.. Cullinan advo-
Gated the proper improvement water
front and the establishment of ter
minals.
Congressman j. S. Mansfield fol-
The Morgan City daily review. (Morgan City, La.) 1916-1920, 1917-11-27
Government Shipyards
Delayed By Lack Of
Ti1nbers

New Orleans, La. Nov. 27. For the
first time since Southern pine man
ufacturers inaugurated speeding
up program in behalf of the Nations
wooden fleet, the movement Of ship
timbers from mills to shipyards is
now exceeding a million feet day.
Figures compiled at the local Of
flee of the United States Shipping
Board Emergency Fleet Corporation
show ship timber shipments last week
were as follows
Monday Nov. 10, 92 carloads.
Tuesday, Nov 20. "a carloads.
Wednesday, Nov 21, 43 carloads
Thursday, Nov. %, 81 carloads.
Friday, Nov %, Sc carloads.
Saturday, Nov. "a, 60 carloads.
This makes an average of 81 cars
of ship timbers shipped each day. and
a total of 4O2 cars for the week.
Carloads Of ship timbers average 16,-
900 feet to the car, so the total
amount of ship timbers moved to
shipbuilding plants during the SIX
day period was approximately g.
$4,000 feet or l,O72,OO0 feet per
day.
In spite of the better showing by
mills, w. j. Hayden, assistant pur-
chasing agent of the Fleet Corpora
ton, declares shipyards are being
supplied in no way near their re-
quirements. Two million feet day
will be necessary to enable shipbuild-
ers to make up for lest time, says
Mr.. Haymen. Large sizes, espe-
cially timbers such as arc used In
the frames of vessels, are particu-
larly needed.
Fully one-half the shipyards are
today wholly or partially idle" says
Mr.. Haymen. I'VE must have more
of the big sizes, and have them
quick"
The Morgan City daily review. (Morgan City, La.) 1916-1920, 1917-11-27

lowed with an address explaining the
work by congress in the past and
what they were prepared to do in
the future for the improvement of
Rivers and Harbors.
The Evening Session closed with
the reading of a paper by Mr.. Lind
say, Waters of Mission, Texas, which
dealt principally with conditions and
lack of transportation facilities in
the Rio Grande Valley.
Night Session.
The Night Session was addressed
by Chairman J. H. Small, Chairman
Rivers and Harbors Committee Of
Congress. He laid particular stress
upon the establishment Of terminals
and the improvement of water front,
as we'll as the construction of whar-
yes and landings by the municipali-
ties that expect to benefit from this
traffic. He explained, showing sta
tistics, that the railroads had invest
ed thousands in trackage facilities
where they had spent millions in per-
fecting their terminals. He illus
trated the manner in which water
transportation will fail to serve its
economic purpose in competition
with railroads unless terminals prop
erly designed and constructed are
available. He also explained why
good roads should be considered as
a part of water development, ex-
planning that good roads are neces-
sary in order to get the bulk of the
farm products to the terminals
Congressman Murray Hubert
New York City, said that he did not
The Morgan City daily review. (Morgan City, La.) 1916-1920, 1917-11-27

on the resources OF the section to
be tapped by the canal, calling at
tentlon to the TACT that along its
route 100000 tons Of sulphur, 3OO,-
900 tons of salt, 10000 barrels of
oil, and 100000 sacks Of oysters
were produced annually, besides the
large amount of produce raised each
season, and a vast quantity of lum-
Der that would find market in
these days when it was absolutely
needed for shipbuilding and other
purposes. Mr.. Alexander dwelt at
some length on the great resources
of the section of Louisiana contig-
uous to the gulf coast, and said its
already large yield of foodstuffs
could be much increased if proper
transportation were available His
address seemed to make a marked
impression on the congressman.
Walter Parker of the Association
of Commerce then was called on by
Chairman Small, and spoke at
length on water traffic generally,
and the economic conditions created
by the opening of the Panama Can
al.
Judge Whit Martin, when called
on, said he could add little to what
Mr.. Alexander had said. He did,
however. ask if the canal could not
be routed through Houma, and he
asked Colonel Sanford if the canal
could not go through Houma if the
town donated street for the right
of way.
Colonel Sanford, who had traced
the route of the canal as surveyed
by the engineers with great care for
the benefit Of the members Of the
committee and who had explained
matters not understood, replied to
Judge Martin that the width Of the
street, as proposed, would be much
too narrow. Asked by Judge Martin
to make out distinctly where it was
proposed to cut the canal at Houma,
Colonel Sanford indicated a line five
miles below the town.
Garland Dupre urged that the pro-
ject between New Orleans and Nor
gan City be put in the next rivers
and harbors bill. He said the COM
mittee should adopt not only reason
for doing the work. France and per-
haps Germany had not abandoned
canalization because of the war, and
the United States should not, but
should pass the rivers and harbors
bill and provide for such projects As
this.
Mr.. Small asked about the water
hyacinth, and Mr.. Alexander said
thise pest not only blocked naviga.
ton, but it killed the fish, valuable
food supply. The handling Of this
proposition, in his opinion. was
strictly a federal measure, for the
eradication of the hyacinths was
necessary to navigation in some
streams.
At this point the Alexandra
reached Larose, where the bayou is
cut by the Harvey canal No. ,, ane
The Morgan City daily review. (Morgan City, La.) 1916-1920, 1917-11-27
E,v9 Waterway Nine
Feet Deep To Nor
sn City
fsressuen Return From
III Visit Impressed
III What They Saw

n.nhers Of the rivers and harbors
.unittee Of the House of Repre-
..,utatiyes who attended the inland
raervays convention at Corpus
cr;sti. Texas, left Sunday night by
~ Leuisville and Nashville railroad
~ Mobile, delighted with the cordi-
N Il their reception in Louis
-. and impressed with the neces-
- & tie construction by the fed
a government and of the appro-
nl|ptipn BY the coming of session Of
cvae,en Of : sufficient sum to
IA the link from Lake Salvador to
nhstsa City.
Am reviewing the history Of the
fsojDet briefly, Mr.. Small said his
~ was that it would be well to
u ~ a ! section Of the work to
II q, and in his opinion that Sec
- the stretch between Lake
1sl1se and Morgan City. This,
y hhieved, was the proper proceed
II 1e1use there was a large COM
- b 6st section searching a
~ M that market could be
& - = New Orleans, which was al
n esrtant distributing point.
lghs-Fsst Depth.
on mid if the matter were
QrOached the committed
~ 5be engineering board t.
3 - Ae five-foot canal project
e tie nine-foot plan. He
1satioh to the absolute ne
j. terminal facilities, and
i ~ past Congressional COM
N I'D agreed to water i'm
ut On the supposition that
= would be supplied to feed
oesNiy, to learn later the i'm
TT Wis not used. He thought
npnities interested should
- assurance to Ne commit
s n1oge It reported that the COM
d vssA be supplied and that the
= terminal weuld be built.
Alexandsr addressed the body
The Morgan City daily review. (Morgan City, La.) 1916-1920, 1917-11-27
The Chamber Of Comerce Of Morgan
gan City and Berwick,
Morgan City. La.

gan City and Berwick,
Morgan City. La.
Gentlemen:
We, your representatives to the
Thirteenth Annual Convention of the
Waterway League Of Louisiana and
Texas, held at Corpus Christi, Texas,
November 22nd and 23rd, 1917, beg
to report as follows:
Nov. 22nd Morning Session.
After registration of delegates at
the Nueces Hotel we adjourned to
the Convention Hall. Invocation by
Rev. John W. Sykes, d. D.
The address of welcome was deliv-
cred by Hon. Roy Miller, who in an
address fired with eloquence, pleaded
for a more loyal anil unified activity
! in the future. He was frequently in
terrupted with applause and at the
close of his address the delegates
made known their appreciation in a
manner benefitting the occasion.
The Address of Welcome was re-
sponded to by Mr.. S. Locke BreauX
of New Orleans, in a clear and ex-
pressive manner.
The Annual Address of the Presl.
dent was read by Mr.. c. S. E. Hol,
land, Victoria, Texas, outlining the
efforts that had been made, are be-
ing made, and will continue to be
made for til compilation of the In
tercsastal Canal from the Mississippi
River y the Rie 0rande.
The ANNUAL Reports of the Sec
retary and Trasurer were read BY
Hon Leon Locke Of Lake Charles
La, and Mr.. G. J. Palmer of Hous
ton, Texas, respectively. The Treas
urer's report showed that Mr.: Locke:
salary as Secretary of the organiza
ton had not been paid since May
1917, and that about so per cent OF
the amounts paid by the different
communities, organizations, etc, hat
been paid as agreed.
/! Your representatives, T. L. Morse
and j. p Hebert were placed on the
Committees on Nominations and
Resolutions respectively.
Afternoon Session.
A very appropriate and instructive
| address was delivered by Col. Frank
/ P. Holland, Editor of Farm and
! Ranch and Hollands Magazine. We
would like to add that. Col. Holland
is splendid old gentleman who en-
joys the affection and respect of
his vast acquaintances and although
"love" is seldom applied as man-to-
man, it may be said with all SINGER
ity that he is loved in Texas. His
address was devoted to Canals and
Navigation and their relations to
railroads both as a developing me-
dunn and transportation facility. He
very clearly explained the history OF
canals both in the American and
European Continents, showing the
vast amount of tonnage, value, and
products handled over canals that
are properly utilized. A vote OF
thanks was extended him by the del
egates after the tremendous -ap-
plause had subsided.
Col. Holland was followed by Hon
Martin Behrman, who was introduc
The Morgan City daily review. (Morgan City, La.) 1916-1920, 1917-11-27

Columbia Carbon Paper and
Typewriter Ribbons for sale at the
Review Office. Phone 27S.