davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1917-08-25

started on down the street togeth.
er.
Nothing was said for several
minutes. Then the man broke the
silence.
Now Jim, what's the row about"
he said.
well. | tell YOU" began Jimmie
G., swallowing rather hard, in the
dark. You know. Bill Hadley got
a new thirty-five cent ball the other
day.--an' it rolled in Old Man
Ezras watermelons. an he wouldn'
let Bill get it. An so was goin'
to join a club, an the fellers start
ed it. An I was gettin' initiated,
an'.-well. l was JUS gettin' a wa
termelon that would pay up for
that thirty-tive cent ball of Bills.
That's all, l guess"
BY this time they had reached
Jimmie's front steps. and they
could see his mother sitting by the
lamp in the living room. Jean and
little sister. Mary had gone to bed.
and so Jimmie breathed a sigh of
relief to know his mother was
alone.
Say. Mr.. McKirdy, would you
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1917-08-25
Such Ailments

1--WE just been discharged" said
the shot gun gloomily.
I'm going to strike" said the
clock with a decision.
I'm all tired said the auto
standing at the gate.
81 haven't a stitch to wear" said
the sewing machine while on the
run.
The bell had tolled (told) so much
that it was ashamed of itself.
The only thing that seemed to be
enjoying itself in the whole lot was
the garden hose playing upon the
lawn.
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1917-08-25
PAGE THREE

will want to do them again. just
like Columbus did. Because you
see T. r. II. means Try Everything
Twice"
Jimmie G. was silent for min.
ute or two. Then he said. Il guess
1t won't be very nice to have to so
down to that old police station to-
morrow morning an pay Old Man
Ezra for his watermelon. But,
say mother, now honestly, don't
you think l did pretty good job
of picking it out?"
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1917-08-25
issued Today
GREAT TIMES ARE THESE
"SHUTALkA" CAMPERS LIVES

After the "big show" is over out
at the "Shutalka," we have a little
program given in "Camptown' out
in the same ozone. The program
remains the same all during the
life of the "Shutalka"-if there are
any changes - they're for the
worse. The program is:
$50 p. m.-Ukulele practice, all
u of the players at once.
9:45 p. m.-One of the Camp
todians" make hit with new fell
low-She explains it in front of a
sleepers tent.
1000 p. m.-Ukulele solo "The
Band-saW's dream"
1910 .. m.-FiddIe solo, Tine
cats night mare"
1915 p. m.-The Sympathy Or
chestra will play, consisting of
ukuleles. flies, fiddles, Jews harps,
graphophones and unframed voices.
1925 p. m.-Ukulele duet. INA.
bring in the skillet-its more in
tune"
1896 p. m.-Song by the chorus,
-Four o'clock a. m, is time enough
to go to sleep"
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1917-08-25

After q moving picture reel has
been made it must be edited" in
somewhat the same method as is q
manuscript. This operation Ia per-
formed by the editor making his
direction in a debating machine as
the reel is worked off in front Of
him.
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1917-08-25
TOO BAD, THESE CHICKS
WERE MATCHED THIS WAY

Bingtown-Squire Tibbetts used
an old box Of saw dust to set an
old hen and eggs in few weeks
ago-and when the chickens hatch
ed. five of them had wooden legs
and three were block heads.
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1917-08-25

1t is estimated by the National
Automobile Chamber OF Commerce
that 100000 automobiles were
manufactured in 1916 valued at
$S10.000.000.
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1917-08-25
"OLD MAN GROUCHY"

A little playlet in five acts-one
character-and same big stage set
ting all thru play.
Cast of Character.
OLD MAN GROUCHY, a miser-
able old human being, sour on the
woodworking pleases him or ever
will.
Synopsis.
Scene-This whole world on one
stage.
Place-Everywhere he goes.
Time-Past, present and future.
Eye Editors Note - The old
crouch appears aione-with bull
dog expression on his map" which
grew with him from childhood days.
He notices no one-he hates him
self-he despises everybody in the
world-he could crush happy joy to
death-and the only living friend
he has or ever did have is Great.
Observation-Disclosures, etc,
Grandpa Gloom Killjoy. This old
crouch is SO mean that ordinary
breakfast food does not satisfy him
and his morning breakfast food is
carpet tacks covered with sand and
Machine lubricating oil)
Now on with the play
Act 1.
Grouchy in the morning.
Grouchy in the night
Grouchy if you're wrong,
Grouchy if you're right.
Act2.
Grouchy if you're pleasant,
Grouchy if you're mad
Grouchy if you're happy.
Grouchy if you're sad.
Act 3.
Grouchy If you're poor.
Grouchy if you're wealthy,
e Grouchy if you're sick,
Grouchy if you're healthy,
Act q.
Grouchy if you're quiet,
Grouchy if you're talking,
Grouchy if you ride,
Grouchy if you're walking.
Act S.
Grouchy when you're away,
Grouchy when you're here.
Grouchy in his pleasure,
Every day in the year.
(Curtain)
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1917-08-25

All news notes that would sound
like it would make good reading
for the Breeze, should be sent to
HicksviIle Breeze, care of the Juni-
or Palladium.
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1917-08-25
VILLAGE BlABRER is WELL

Mrs. Hen Witherbeed has recov-
cred from her rheumatism and is
able to drop in on the neighbors
every day, SO that every one in the
village knows what every one else
is doing. 1t was mighty dull here
while Mrs. Witherbeed was laid up.
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1917-08-25
NICK Err S
THEY TRY TO RAISE
CHICKENS iNTHIS TOWN

While some of the members of a
colored church were carving a
chicken at dinner in honor of the
new parson, the new parson asked
if the white people raised chickens
around here.
'Brudder Johnson" said the par
son with a smile, 'do the white
folks around heah keep chickens?"
"No, sab, pahrson; but de sut'ly
tries to-"
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1917-08-25
JUST GIVE A SMILE

JUST GIVE A SMILE
Jolly the fellow whose down
today,
Give him a smile for his
SORROW
The world sometimes has a
funny way,
And you may be down
tomorrow.
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1917-08-25
acknowledgements"

HEARD FROM TENT TO TENT.
Did YOU wind the cat and put
out the clock. Mabel?"
mo. but | locked the light and
blew out the door"
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1917-08-25
WE ANSWER ALL QUESTIONS

Dear Huck-What is the life of a
flea ?-B. X.
Answer-Very hard, If not an
educated flea. They usually go to
the dogs in very short time after
they come on earth.
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1917-08-25
BREEZE
HUcKELsERRY FINN, EDITOR

Published every now and then to
let the people of the community
know almost the truth" and lives
up to it's reputation.
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1917-08-25
SOCIETY

Homersque Everett Fisher. the
lightweight pugilist of Bean Ridge,
is visiting down on the farm near
Center Point.
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1917-08-25

After he had gone Jimmie G. and
his mother had one Of their long
talks.
I'm ever so glad you are going
to belong to q TRY Anything Once
Club" Jimmie" she said. "Ev-
erybody who ever has done any
thing worth while, has had to be a
member. Columbus had to. before
he crossed the ocean for the first
time; and the Wright brothers had
to before they learned to fly In
their aeroplanes. But Jimmie, the
only really good members Of the
club. are the ones who do things to
make them worthy of the second
degree In the Order, and it is call.
ed the r. E. r."
"The T. f. t." repeated Jimmie.
Whats that"
That's what | want you to be-
long to, because then the things
you do will be such fun that YOU
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1917-08-25

MOTHER GooSE's GARDEN
Little Miss Muffet went out to
rough it
BY working with spade and hoe,
But when the tomatoes came up as
potatoes
Poor startled Miss Muffet said,
ooh"
Little Jack Horner grows beets In
the corner
And corn that his neighbors can't
beat
He's worked 'em all season and that
is the reason
His folks will have plenty to eat.
There was an old woman who lived
in shoe
Who had so many children she
didn't know what to do
So she set 'em to work with the
spade and hoe
And she'll feed 'em next winter
on things tina tiey grow
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1917-08-25
BEEFLESS DAYS -IMPOSSIBLI

BEEFLESS DAYS IMPOSSIBLE
LUCAS GAP When Sarah
Mootston told her husband that
owing to the war she was going to
give him one beefless day a week,
he said he wished he could believe
it, but she'd been beefing to him
about something every day for
thirty years, he guessed she
couldn't cut it out now--eyen for
one day.
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1917-08-25

10:45 p. m.-Ukulele quartette,
LET the Anvil Chorus Ring"
1900 p. Must General noise
till twelve o'clock.
11:15 p. m.-Ukulele Sextette,
"'The dogs last howl"
1880 p. m.-Violin solo. "The
Butcher Shop Rag"
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1917-08-25

CHEER UP!
Some people who doesn't make a
fool OF theirself occasionally is the
one whom nature saved the trou-
BILE.
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1917-08-25
HE'S SixTY-BUT HAS THE
ukULELE FEVER ABOUT RIGHT

OBSERVATION-DISCLOSURES Plum was
over to the city last Wednesday,
where he purchased one Of them
new-fangled Ukuleles, After prac-
ticing on it for a solid day Squire
Urks told him it would be perhaps
six months before he could be able
to play tune.
There is no reason why Constable
Plum shouldn't come out to the
Chautauqua and do his practicing
We have over seventy ukuleles with
us, and there are at least two
who can play tune. Come on out
and join us; we need more men,
bers - as we might as well all
practice together.
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1917-08-25
TRY THIS ONE
Here are the words You can
write your own music-but
you'll find the air outside.

David was shepherd boy,
A manly little feller;
When along came Goliath,
Acting pretty yeller.
So David took a pebble
An hit him on the crust.
And you ought t'ave seen Goliath
there,
A-lickin' up the dust!
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1917-08-25

BETTER SETTLE QUICK
Mr.. Oscar Buttercup
owes bills all over town,
He'd better settle up,
Before they shake him down.
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1917-08-25

mind coming In and helping me tell
her." asked Jimmie G., nodding his
head towards the open window.
"Sure, I'll help YOU" said his
friend. And he did
The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1917-08-25

A little playlet in five acts-on'
character-and same big stage set
ting all thru play.
Ashland tidings. [volume] (Ashland, Or.) 1876-1919, 1917-05-07
Died.

Friends of Mrs. Forest Emery, for
merly Miss Mabel Frances Blake.
we're grieved to learn OF her death
from typhoid fever, which occurred
in this city last Thursday morning,
May 3. She was we'll known by all
the pioneer families, her father, Chris
Blake, being one Of the first carpen-
ters in Ashland and helped with al
the pioneer Improvements Mrs.
Emery was truly a self-made woman,
having spent most of her life in the
beautiful wilds OF the Dead Indian
country, where she learned nature as
few of us knew it, Her collection Of
500 or more botanical specimens Of
wild flowers is one of the finest in
the state. She could do any part Of
the heavy farm work, yet educated
herself in all the finer arts. Since
her marriage to Mr.. Emery in OctO-
ber, 1915, they have lived happily on
his farm seven mTes east of town.
and her death comes as a great shock
to him and the aged mother and
brother, Charles Blake and sister.
Mrs. William Addison, of Independ-
ence Ore. She leaves 1O-days-old
baby daughter, Aileen Frances, who
will never know this mothers love.
but Mr.. and Mrs. j. W. Mccoy have
given her a place in their home and
hearts where it will receive every
care. The funeral was held Satur-
day from the Dodge undertaking par
lors. Rev. Mr.. Doran officiating.
Ashland tidings. [volume] (Ashland, Or.) 1876-1919, 1917-05-07
Farewell to Bride.

A very pleasant and sociable time
was spent at the home Of Miss Freda
Butterfield last Friday evening on
the occasion of her leaving Ashland
to make her home in Portland with
a former Ashland boy, S. A. Peters.
Those who were invited by her par
ents to partake of bountiful repast,
consisting Of many delicious things.
and to extend congratulations, were:
Misses Corabete Moorehouse. Lula
Fowler. Lillian Fowler, NJ. D., Mrs.
Boyd Mrs C. A. Brown and Mr.. and
Mrs. H. John Vine. The latter is the
pastor and wife of the Baptist
church, of which the Butterfields are
faithful members.
Later in the evening a number OF
the young people of the Baptist
church dropped in to enjoy a social
time and express wishes Of congratu-
lation, prosperity and happiness o
the bride-to-be
Mss Butterfield received many
beautiful presents to remind her Of
the esteem in which she was held by
so many.
Ashland tidings. [volume] (Ashland, Or.) 1876-1919, 1917-05-07
Peters-Buttprfield.

Miss Freda Butterfield, daughter
of Mr.. and Mrs. Fl. o Butterfield of
this city. and S. A. Peters, Jr., son
of S. A Peters of this city, were mar
ried IN Salem at the Baptist parson-
age Saturday evening Miss Butter
field Is the president Of the local
chapter of the Girls Honor Guard
and prominent in church and social
circles. Mr. Peters left Ashland a
few months ago to enter the employ
of the Canadian Bank of Commerce
at Portland where he has rapidly ad-
vanced to the position of teller in the
savings department. Both have a
host of friends here who wish them
every happiness. Mr.. Peters is a
member of the 1st company Coast
Artillery here, and will Join the COM
pany in event of call
Ashland tidings. [volume] (Ashland, Or.) 1876-1919, 1917-05-07
Annual Dinner.

The annual dinner at the Christian
church Thursday evening was quite
an enjoyable affair and was well at
tended. Over a hundred members
and friends of the church were pres
ent to enjoy the good things under
which the long table fairly groaned
After the dinner the church business
meeting was held.
The Christian Social Circle Chris
tian Woman's Board of Missions,
church treasurer and Sunday school
all gave very good reports. The So
cial Circle was commended for paying
s45 more into the church than their
pledge of s50-the pledge being paid
by December 10. Rev. Mellinger also
was commended for turning $50 into
the church treasury aside from his
pledge
II was voted that trustees as fol.
lows hold over for another year: G.
P. McAllister, James Beagle. A. H.
/ Peachey, NJ. C. Edgington and G. W.
Milan; elders. W B. Holmes. J NJ.
Beaver, A. H. Peachey, George Meal
lister, G. ". Benedict; deacons, V, V.
Hawley. J y. McCune, ]. V. Wright,
James Beaee, F. D. Swingle, ]. w.
Haskins ]. NJ. Morgan, Ed Hunt:
deaconesses, Mrs. Morrison, Mrs J v
Wright, Mrs. w. B. Holmes Mrs. Roy
Hale, Mrs. ]. n. Morgan Mrs. J w.
Haskins, Mrs. L. Caldwell. J. w.
Haskins was retained as financial sec
retary and Charles Edgington as
clerk.
Ashland tidings. [volume] (Ashland, Or.) 1876-1919, 1917-05-07

stoned much fun and intense rivalry.
Mr.. Pittman of the State Normal
School, County Superintendent Ager,
County Pathologist Cate and Mayor
Gates of Medford spoke briefly in the
afternoon, and School Supervisor
Peterson announced the results OF the
field day trials which were held in
the forenoon.
Mr.. Findiay of the State Game and
Fish Department showed his wild
bird and animal pictures early in the
evening, after which there was 4
"weenie" roast. The band gave a
concert and the festivities wound uo
with a dance in the hall, music being
furnished by Prof. Loveland's orches-
tra. Eagle Pointers said that the
dance was the largest ever held in
their hall, and all spoke highly Of the
music of both band and orchestra.
The affair was under the direction
of Principal Wheeler of the Eagle
Point schools, formerly of Wagner
Creek, and did him and the schools
participating much credit.
The Ashlanders came struggling
home from 6 p. m to 4:30 g. m.
(good morning), the last car being
"Bill' Loomis's with the orchestra.
Ashland tidings. [volume] (Ashland, Or.) 1876-1919, 1917-05-07
In the Social Realm
Live League Meeting.

The Epworth League of this city
has hit upon a plan for assuring
good attendance at the monthly bust
ness meetings. Each member bring:
something to eat, and then everybody
gathers around a table about two rods
long and enjoys what the other fe!
low has brought After the i'm
promptu banquet, chairs are pushed
back and the business of the evening
disposed of in lieu of after dinner
speeches. Tuesday evening two
hour session was necessary to dispose
of the regular and special problems
of the society. Finishing touches
were put on the plans for the forth
coming district convention, which is
to be held here, beginning May IS.
District President p. o. Smith has
been busy holding rallies during the
past month at Talent, Central Point
and Gold Hell and doing other pre-
convention work, in which he is ably
assisted by the district secretary, Miss
Gertrude Barber.
The average attendance OF the
League for April was H. The mercy
and help department under the direc-
tion of Miss Nina Brewer has been
doing splendid work. reporting for
April Is sick calls, 80 calls on stran-
gers. 19 bouquets of flowers given
away, help extended to 6 needy per-
sons, $3.50 worth of clothes bought
for poor children so the latter could
go to school, and Is other garments
given away. The department of spir-
itual work reported a Sunday school
organized at Neil Creek, with H. S.
Palmerlee as superintendent.
The annual election of officers re-
suited as follows: President, p o.
Smith. first vice, Chess Mckinney;
second vice. Jessie Thatcher; third
vice, Nina Brewer; fourth vice, Ger
trude Barber; fifth vice. Annabelle
Van Natta; secretary. Jess Clary;
treasurer, Ada Hartley; organ'st, Ber-
nice Yeo. The president mentioned
the fact that the last named officer
had never been tardy or absent but
once during the past year, and then
she furnished a substitute.
Ashland tidings. [volume] (Ashland, Or.) 1876-1919, 1917-05-07
Methodist Missionary Meeting.

The Foreign Christian Missionary
Society of the NJ. E church was held
Friday afternoon at Mrs. G. F. Bill
/ lings' home on North Main street. \
number Of ladies we're present and
] the hostess, Mrs. Billings, served re-
| freshments after the devotional pro-
gram was ended.
Mrs. Ralph Billings conducted the
devotional period of the program, af-
ter which a business session was he'd.
Then Mrs. Van Fossen took charge
of the program for the remainder Of
the service and gave a good talk on
"Heroism of Christian Conquest
She spoke of the physical heroism Of
our soldiers in the war in comparison
with the spiritual heroism of true SOL
diers of the cross. In both cases suf-
fering and hardship must he endured
for the cause we love. Mrs. Herbert
spoke on "The Heroism of Island
Pioneers" Mrs. Eubanks on MAR
tyrs of the Meeting" Mrs. Russell on
Recalled BY Cable" Mrs Douglass,
speaking on "Thibet," recalled to our
minds the fact that it is heroism %
work among these uncivilized people
missionaries finding them very hard
to work with on account of their be-
ing so treacherous. Mrs. Ralph BIZ
lings spoke on "The Cup of Chinese
Woe" This had reference to the
Boxer uprising and the trying ordeal
of the missionaries. A talk was given
on African Heroism" by Mrs
Marske, followed by several readings
by Mrs. Hellwig a recent arrival in
our city. The first reading was
Just a Little Light" followed by a
comical reading. "Mr. Brown Got His
Hair Cut" This was the closing Of
a very splendid program.
Ashland tidings. [volume] (Ashland, Or.) 1876-1919, 1917-05-07
Local Folks Enjoy
Eagle Point Doings

The field meet and community
Day held at Eagle Point Thursday
was thoroughly enjoyed by the Ash
land contingent. The Ashland band
had been secured some weeks ago to
furnish music for the event, and
though a series of unexpected hap
penings kept Messrs. Enders, Busn,
McGee, Freeman, Paulserud, Jordan
and Mowat at home, Prof. Loveland,
with characteristic energy, con
scripted" Prof. Root, w. H. Howell,
willie" Waite, Mr. White and Bob
by Allen from Medford and Happy
Hadfield of Central Point, and did
credit to the city.
The band party consisted of Prof.
Loyeland and wife. Mrs ]. NJ. Love-
land. V. o. ~ Smith and wife AMI
George Francis (don't forget George
Francis; he was the busiest man in
the bunch. Prof Loveland not except
ed), William Loomis, o. F. Carson,
William Hodgkinson, Archie Eubanks
and Meredith Beaver H. ]. Boyd
took over one load of band men and
3. W. Talcott accompanied Mr.. Car
son.
The entire party had read in the
Medford Tribune of the meals at the
"Sunnyside" of "Eaglets" fame, and
found them fully up to specifications
E. D. Briggs, Monte Briggs, Pierre
Provost and o. H. Frohbach went
over to boom the Hyiu Hehe, Round
up and Chautauqua and did a good
job.
Among other Ashlanders present
we're Misses Helen Dickerson. Helen
Moore, Nell Peachey and Margaret
Hodgson, who are teaching in that
part of the county, and several of
them had pupils in the contest. Su-
perintendent Ager and Supervisor
Peterson, who were present, give
good reports of the work of the Ash
land schoolms ans.
other familiar faces were "Uncle
Billy" Butler and family, now OF
Brownsboro, and Mr.. and Mrs. w. Y.
Crowson of Medford. They were ac-
companied by Miss Lucille Barber OF
this city.
There we're several unique features
in the field meet. The Ford was un-
usually in evidence. the potato race
being staged with autos, each car
having a driver and young lady
who handled the potatoes. Inquiry
fails to reveal where the jewels were
secured for this and the potato polo,
game participated in by about
dozen young horsemen. A tourna-
ment feature embracing the attempt
to gather rings suspended along the
course, with spears held by galloping
riders, attracted much attention.
Two other odd auto contests were
that of having lady try to hold
boiled egg on a small spoon, holding
the spoon handle in her mouth, while
the car jounced over a succession of
two-by-fours laid across the track
about two feet apart, and that of hav-
ing a lady try to bite biscuit which
was hung on a string, while the car
passed under it. They both occa-