Tulsa daily world. [volume] (Tulsa, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 1905-1919, 1917-07-08
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WOWS and\GO,uc
News andNQWS

Il offered TO enlist but they
wouldn't take me-" he said. He was
As years old. spawned in one limb.
walked on a stick, didn't have enough
teeth to masticate much and couldn't
tell green from Olive Drab.
I'm willIn' TO 60" he spouted.
Wish they'd let me carry a gun and
fight fer Unkle SAM"
Ten minutes later, on the next street
corner. he addressed an admiring and
attentive crowd OF curbstone dec
orators:
"What're we fightin for? Huh? Tell
me, somebody Don't know. do you?
Course not. Neither d. |. What're
we sendin' men over to Europe fer?
Just 10 get EN- slaughtered. thassal.
don't blame 'em fer not volunteerin'.
Fifteen minutes later he squatted in
the rocking chair at home.
"Jawn." shouted his wife from the
BACK porch. When you're rested up
wish you'd take this bundle OF
Washin over TO Mrs. Joneses and COL
lect 80 cents, so we can get some flour
and salt pork for tomorrow"
Get one o tn kids to CO." John
shouted back with great effort. I'm
tired all out Been lookin' all over
town fer Job. Mighty hard work,
I'll tell you"
That night his wife attended a
meeting OF the Red Cross women,
sewed bandages and surgical sup
plies for two hours, gave a dime sne
had held out from the last washing
money to help buy a sewing machine
for the workroom, and plodded home
ward in time TO make a hot lemonade
for hubby and battle his weary feet
in hot water.
Editor Of the lola (Kan.) Regis
ter says young man ran his touring
car into the ditch after drinking freely
Fl ON a quart OF whisky. and points
ID the case as a concrete reason why
We should have national prohibition.
which is all right, hut why can't we
he far ebout it? Does he want the
young man to drink gasoline!
Folks at Ada. Okla. know how to
celebrate the Fourth. They had
dance and Zeb Seybold WAS the fid-
dler. Balance all!
Fellow down in Georgia wants TO
stop the manufacture OF booze in
order to save the wheat and corn.
Wonder what he'd think about IL II
someone discovered a way to make
tie stuff out of watermelons?
Dearing. Kan, is all het up. This
from the bearing notes in the COffey-
vile Journal:
Like all towns Dearing has few
critics. The program committee for
| the Fourth planned to build a dancing
platform for the young peoples
| amusement. But some of the church
people are making big kick and
say that they will not place stand in
! the park and sell to people that dance.
However, the young people say that
whenever there is lawn supper or
, home talent show that these same
church people do not hesitate 10 take
the dancing populations tainted dimes
and quarters. Not all the chu: ch peo-
pie are objecting TO the dance plat
form, but some are. The young folks
who dance hope the committee will
go ahead with the dance platform as
previously planned and advertised and
this will probably be done.
What would the dear brothers and
sisters of bearing say If they had tho
Jitney Struggle?
Ponca City Courier says that Elmer
flagan is gong east to ioin a military
company made up of cowboys from
the planes Must be out of an aero
squadron.
Nobody has vet found out how 70
bottle homemade cider and keep it
| till next winter.
An Arizona man has invtented
kalsomine that that you can rub off
the wall on your fingers and use for
face powder. May be all right, but
what married man wants to repaint
his bedroom walls every thirty days?
! Eb Hudgins, the Wickville cabinet
maker. says that he's pretty old but
he guesses he'll have to enlist as they
seem to need a lot OF men in his line
over in Europe now.
, Roosevelt says In fifty years the
Atlantic coast will be the backdoor of
the United States. The colonel must
figure on prohibition sweeping tho
western front first.
| Wilson Gangrene Wickshire has
Joined the Y. NJ. C. A. When seen at
the Busy Bee confectionery last night
he stated he is going in for checkers
as he believes the selective draft will
eliminate most of his competition IN
pool and billiards. Wilson NAV have
a vision at that!