La Junta tribune., 1917-03-15

Since President Wilson has signed
the federal bone-dry law, unless the
Colorado legislature enacts a stat
ute In conformity with II there Will
be no law enforcing machinery In
Colorado on the first day OF July
when the congressional enactment
goes into effect.
b
'.The bone-dry law is sure having
effects down In Kansas" remarked
j. U. Griffin, who returned few
days ago from Kansas, where he had
taken a shipment OF sheep. 1T is said
the officials searched the grips and
trunks OF some OF the trains. fell
low isn't allowed to think about
ooze."-Fowier Tribune.
>
An old negro man was taking a
trip on the train. Falling asleep with
his mouth wide open, mischievous
Pueblo drummer came along and
having a convenient capsule OF qui-
nine in his pocket, he uncorked II
and shifted II well down on the old
negro's palate and roof OF his tongue.
The old darkey awakening, began to
spit around and called for the con-
ductor saying: Boss. is deere doctor
on dis here train,;' II don't know"
said the conductor. Are you sick7"
Yes sir. sho' Is sick" What is
the matter with your" Il donno. sir:
but II tastes like busted my gall.
>
As to COW population the state OF
Vermont ranks highest. II has one
COW for every els acres OF i'm
proved land. The state OF Wisconsin
has one COW for every SOC acres:
Minnesota, one COW for every 1903
acres. Iowa, one COW for every 20.97
acres; Illinois. one COW for every
2s7 acres; Missouri, one COW for ey-
cry 2s.7 acres South Dakota has one
COW for every f2s acres of improved
2s.7 acres; Missouri. one COW for ey-
cry 1892 acres. Colorado, one COW
for every forty-fivc acres: Wyoming.
one COW for each asa acres Of i'm
proved land, II Uhl be noticed that
the rumbcr a. COWS to the acre de-
clines from cast to west.
=
The solution OF the paradox,
when is an American not an Amer
lean" has Just been discovered by
Benno Weller. born in Nebraska. and
more recently engaged as a farmer
in Canada. Wieler came to Canada
some years ago and in order to OBJ
tain a patent on a farm there be
came naturalized citizen OF Great
Britain. a few weeks ago he returned
TO this country and tried to eplist
in the United States Marine Corps
but was rejected as an alien. The
secretary OF labor vas appealed to
and decided that Weller would be
required 10 go through the same
procedure as foreigner In order to
again become a citizen OF the United
States. which he did and was enlisted.
wieler said he would not change ma
tlonalltics again for a farm.
The second Inauguration of Wood
row Wilson as president Of the United
s,.,.a To-, s...N. 80. -. 49, 80,
usual occurrence, for since 1859 four
other men have FOR n second time
been indicted into that high office
Lincoln. Grant Cleveland and Me-
Kinley But the swearing In Of Thos
X. Marshall A. vic" president WAS IN
usual. for II was the first time In
cirh,y-flye years that such a thing
has happened Not since John c, Cal.
houn was sworn in az vice president.
In 1929. has any one succeeded him
seif In that office, Only four men.
John Adams. George Clinton. Daniel
u. Thompkins and John c. Calhoun.
In our les years OF national life.
have occupied the offic. Of yie..pres,
id.nt NOR. than single term. and
but two OF these. Adams and Thomp-
kins. were associated with the same
chief executive.
.
The great family journal circu-
iates In every cline under the sun
even In Siam and South Amcricm.
Right here on this ,errcs,rial sphere
In the good old u. $. A. this paper
eirculates under conditions that are
~ decided contrast. In renewing her
subscription 10 the Tribune Mrs. o.
y. Swanson writes that they are zen.
joying' decidedly cold weather. the