El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1917-01-10
BY G. A. MARTIN.

suitcase in the window labeled S2.65 and
declaring after purchasers had got in
side. that he had sold out all at this
price. but had some others a little high
er- The judge held that a firm must
have what II advertised and AT the price
advertised
Every hear John Wyatt tell about
the time when he captained the Georgia
Peaches OF course this was a mill
tary organization, in fact John mod
estly admits IL was the prize drill team
of the country.
Mai. Asa W Gambler. one OF the at
torneys for the Coco-Cola company,
now on duty here as a major in the
9Th Georgia says there is story told
in Georgia on John which has not come
10 light locally as yet
It seems that the governor OF Geor-
Eia appointed John on his staff a.
real colonel. with all the authority in
the world to wear the gold lace so
popular with members OF governors
staffs few years ago. John promptly
cornered the gold lace market and had
a wonderful and beautiful uniform
built TO the contours of his physique.
After a few days he donned his new
rig. much 70 the envy Of his friends
and went to call He rang the bell
and a small girl. aged s. appeared. took
one comprehensive look al the vision
and promptly vanished Soon ner
strident tones could be heard telling
her mother OF what was a. the door.
Mamma there is q man a. the door
who looks like Mr. Wyatt and talks
like him, but he's dressed Just like
Cod"
Force Of habit: Breaking New Year
resolutions
The galley boy says that 4 raise in
price on eggs hits hard, but he does
Z $50
a box for matches since he can bum
three or four boxes an hour az cigar
stands.
Colonel W. 2 Martin. chief OF staff
10 Gen George Bell jr., helps Cen Bell
run the Fl Paso district dung Office
hours. but II YOU catch him away from
the office he can tell a cOrking good
story and this is one of them. \ great
many years ago a new officer Joined
r western post He went down TO drill
with his captain. and il Is well 20 eX-
plain that the captain was at least a
grandfather, for this was in the old
days Of slow promotion While the
troops were At drill Lieut. X noticed
an old man with A great growth OF
whiskers wandering from squad 70
squad. so he asked his captain VINO
the man was and received this reply:
That young man. is my first sergeant
and you will find him very pleasant
man to get along with" Those who
knew the old army" and the old first
OF the captain was part OF the Cos
pei,
I've heard OF men committing COM
mercial suicide and things of that sort,
but never saw a better example OF II
than. when in San Antonio recently. 7
was shown a man. who. while working
for the street car company. had bought
a flivVer and put 1t into the 1itne
service. It is needless 10 say that his
connection with the street car company
had ceased when he was pointed out
to me and he was driving Il himself.
Rufus Daniels sends in this one, from
the New York Times;
= native Georgia cracker suffer-
Ing from sore eyes. went 70 q veterin-
ariau for treatment and got It He lost
one of his eyes. however. and sued 10
recover damages. The judge refused
TO award him anything on the ground
but an ass. he never would have gone
to q veterinarian for treatment"
=
Colonel ". II. Allaire IN command
Of the 18th infantry and the camp az
Fl Vale, Mexico. is known through
laire-7 Col AIaire is anything but
wooden and has been military attache
at Vienna. 50 7 do not hesitate TO tell
the anecdote- When the colonel was
A captain he was on duty at West
Point. One day he was inspecting 4
cadet company and one Of the cadets
pointed a rifle at his head. Capt. Al
laire pushed the rifle to one side and
said. Don't YOU know. young man.
that you should never point your rifle
at a person. Why if that rifle went
off. the bullet would 90 through eight
inches Of solid wood" As We all knew.
West Point nicknames stick and the
present colonel got his nickname then
and there.
Recently Capt Arthur Peter Watts
attended four dances. three dinners
and two receptions and next day h.
went his record of the day before sew
aral better. By the third DAY. he was
all IN and planned 10 20 20 bed in
the afternoon and remain there until
next morning. About noon, however.
Milton Schuster and Billy House called
him Up and said they simply must
have some soldiers that evening 10 i'm