Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1917-08-16

in the face OF the King OF Tenors. He
also had fine tenor voice which warbled
the topic songs OF the day, at times high
in vocal range-but not so elevated in
tone of morals; yet these were by many
more appreciated than the usual psalmody
OF the sanctuary. Yea. 1t was even aver
red by some peverse sinners that these
spread abroad more geniality and kindly
feeling, which are the proper aims OF the
songs OF Zion. Teddy was surely the
man who inspired that expressive stanza
in the poet SAKE:
Ye tailor man is glib enough,
He coileth up his limbs
And singeth songs, ye like whereof
Are not in Waits, his hymns.
Unfortunately his energy WENT TO waste
in joviality. Fondness for dissipation and
boon companions diverted him from
more serious business. Industry was not
laeking-he was alert enough, but not in
the proper direction, so he never came
on wave OF prosperity. Once heart
less, grasping landlord lad him elected
from his shop on Main street, merely on
account OF rfot having paid any rent for
several years. He moved his tailor
bench, goose, shears and other parapher-
MALTA down TO poorer street and had
them placed in an abandoned blacksmith
shop, next door TO his old chumS, the
Stephens boys, one OF whom was ad-
dicted to The clarionet, the other 10 the
cornet, and both 10 the bottle. The
smithY having never had cleaning out,
was as foul as that of Vulcan in the i'm
agination of Hamlet. The floor was a
kaleidoscope mixture OF SCOT, dust and
iron scrapings. Yet the tailor bench was
placed in the forge, and there sat Teddy,
his hand on his goose aud smile on his
face, cheerful as ever. When two gen.
tlemen darkened the spring sunshine in
the wide open door, he sang out:
Come in, gentlemen, ard welcome
But please be careful and don'teXpector-
ate on the Administer carpet 4"
There was yet another sphere where
Teddy's desire OF prominence rose 10 the
height OF a supreme ambition, and that
was in the making OF soup. He had sew
eral rivals, whose envious animoSity
never indeed came TO bloodshed, but
made sueering, disparaging remarks about
his concoctions, and suspicious hints as
TO his manner OF obtaining materials.
Soup, hereabout, meant no thin, watery
French bouillon or broth-it went beyond
the agout and consisted of every possible
ingredient, boiled down thereii', as the
rich Kentucky "burgoo," that included
all fashionable courses in one pile, en-
trees, meats, vegetables and dessert.
The chanticleer, the sheep, the steer and
porker, all went in rich harmonious con-
cord 10 the soup-pot II was at times
intnated that the contributionSto Teddy's
soups were not all voluntary. Folks
with stray chickens foraging upon the
street complained that, unlike curses,
they did not come home 10 rooSt. But
fortunately The soup-pot can tell no tales,
nor make any identifying testimony, and
perchance the soup tasted all the better,
as the wise man of Greece, when asked
his preference in wines, replied THAT he
liked that best which someone else paid
for."
AS the seasons roll around IN their
courses, the time came for Teddy TO have
another soup. The repast was always at
night, so as not to interfere with daytime
occupations-a needless precaution, for
the participants were gentlemen OF leis-
ure and pleasure, also win a plentiful
lack OF aught to ill the purse. When in
vited they duly saved up both time and
space for the appetisiug soup, without
qualms about its concoction, cleanliness
or the whencefrom OF its ingredients.
In the afternoon preparation, Teddy
had condensed a month of industry, for
| il was labor OF love as we'll as OF ambi-
ton. He had gathered the choicest ma
terials and would outdo all his former ef-
forts. So when his guests had come, not
clad in festal garments, but armed with
cup and spoon, he gave the comforting
assurance "Boys, tell you, she's line
tonight" So they stood around in eager,
hungry expectancy, looking on The soup
as tho they had row OF teeth IN each
eye, and already tasting its aroma and
flavor thru the sense OF smell. mo
quite ready" so meanwhile the antique
soup joke must be recounted, of the boy
whom his pious mother left 10 watch
pot OF calf-head soup while she wen
over to the church TO enjoy the meeting
giving him in structious that il it began tc
boil over, he should come and call her
This exigencY did occur, so he rushed
over, and from The door beckoned TO HI:
mother then standing up in the Ions
prayer, which was about coming 10 al
end. Not wishing 10 disturb the service
she motioned him to wait, but he grew
impatient, and just as the parson wa.
dropping his voice in the last cadence
before the Amen. he blurted out:
NOW. NANNY, you'd better hurry
for the calps head is buttin' all tht
'taters out OF the pot"
Thereupon one Of the older member:
duly located this piece of antique history
in his youthful deeSlrict, and laid tht
odium OF it on some acquaintance sgsins
whom he carried lifelong grudge. Sin.
gular, this propensity TO reincarnate olt
Jokes that were moss backed wher
! America was discovered.