Brownsville herald. [volume] (Brownsville, Tex.) 1910-current, 1917-08-11
Lucky Guy!'
bys Nftkpt Walter erahaIle Of
the v~igilantes.

tragically.
Drafted, heyf" replied the Consirne-
ton Boss. "Gee, you're a lucky guy"
Lucky shouted the File Clerk
What's lucky about having TO 90 IN the
army and perhaps getting shot! ] don !
see YOU running down to the recruiting OIL
flee and enlisting.'
NO. replied the Construction Boss a.
trifle sadly. but If il wasn't for The
wife and the three kids You would see me
doing just that little thing.
..Say.r he continued, ">ome oil you
young fellows make me tired. ] served In
the Spanish American war, and II didh |
kill met made me a better man IN every
way. Oh. YES, | know that the Spanish
American was wasn't much of show com
pared to this one, but We heard a lew
shots fired, at that
1T isn't only getting shot that worries
me- said the File Clerk. don't want 10
go around s~aluting every officer ! meet
Just n il | wasn't a. good a they are
Anyway, what fun will ! have IN the ar
myl-
you'll have all kinds Of fun-of the
kind Of fun that l. good for you. re
turned the Construction Boss, producing a
sack of Durham and proceeding Ia roll Il
cigarette. And a. for saluting officers
that's a privilege. not a disgrace.
1T shows that YOU are members oil the
same Observation-Disclosures IN arms. The
officer j. lust a much bound Ia return the
salute n YOU are Ia give II. And y You
don't like being a private YOU can be an
ofirer-if YOU are a good enough man.
We need all the officers we can get-all
YOU have 10 do l. To prove that You have
the stuff
'.Well, | don't want any If IT, said the
File Clerk. Little aid New York l. GOOD
enough for
YES, little old New York, eight hours a
day IN an office. a couple Of hours in a
movie theater ar a hum cabaret IN the
evening. a trip To Coney Island on sunday
and all of ten dollars a week. That's =
fine life for a man. isn't i'll
I'm the army You'll get up in the morn
ing feeling like a real man. You'll 20
through a half noun of setting up exer-
else, Ia take the kinks out If Your mus
cles. By the time the busle goe~ for
breakfast You'll want il, and you'll get a
real breakfast. Then YOU viii start IN on
the work of the day. You'll know what
il means Ia sweat. and You'll learn what
4 rood drink Of water really J.. You'll feel
the old sun burning through seur flannel
shirt and You'll like like 1t almost a
much a. the shade ot trees along the du>-
IN road when You fail out for a ten minute
rest.
Along about ten -thirty You'll start
thinking about dinner they don't eai
lunch in the %army--and you'll think about
il harder and ha RIDER until YOU get 4. At
ter dinner yon1l get some more driil-they
give you plenty To do-er learn TO Dig
trenches. or throw bombs or TO read maps,
ar Ia signal, or practice bayonet fighting
all Of them real mems jobs Then you u
get d chance Ia clean mp for retreat. which
comes along about shutdown. That's the
real CLASSY, dre-~-up affair OF the army
day. You'll march out onto the parade
ground and line up IN reeimcntal lorna :
lion. Then the band will play The Star
spangled Banner and you will stand at
attention while the flag comes do@n--and
il you are u real American you u feel u
creepy sensation down your spine and
You'll he so darn proud of your uniform,
and of your regiment, and Of yourself
that You'll almost bust the batlons Of
your shirt!
Then You'll eat again, and clean up
your rifle. After that You can read, or
write. or sit around and swap stories or
sing. Along about nine o'clock YOU y be-
gin 10 get noddy and by the time the wind
hammer blows taps you'll he ready Ia
stretch out on Your cot-and the next
thing You know you'l he cus>ing the bug
Ter for blowing ~reveille in the middle Of
the night.
"Yon won't have much chance io prac-
tice the one step, hut You'll get plenty OF
time for baseball and all the other games
that make men. You'll get a chance to
use your bean, too. The American army
wants men who can think for themselves.
not cattle that have To he driven along by
their officers. You'll hear lectures BY men
who have been up 10 the front. and they
will tell YOU tlings that We civilians won I
hear about until after the war l. over
You'll be kept Interested, all right.
Then sometimes You'll =" out On long
practice hike. You'll learn Row Ia take
care of yourself in the opcu. You'll smell
the smoke Of wood fires at dusk. and see
the moon come up over the long lines Of
pup tents and the biz black army wagons.