The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1917-05-12
ON SPUR OF
THE MOMENT
BIZ ROY z. MOULTON.

Chop Suey.
Chop Suey, oh where can there be
The pen that all honor may bring you?
No present day rhymer nor yet an old
So who in the world then are we
- To try for to praise to sing you,
70 try, in measure. to say how we
And relish your morsels and bits?
All, could We but fashion rhyme,
| sonnet or song so appealing,
The whole world would cherish and never
oh my how we'd MARBLE of you!
! wed have 1t so very sublime,
rh SO filled Inedo with SO 500 lovely feeling,
"Waitert
A dish of Chop suey or two.'
Our hunger We cannot appease,
Ger many a dish have we sported,
| And practically never, or seldom IL ever,
| Have had what we'd say was enough!
| Oh, pity the native Chinese,
For often We've heard it reported,
The folks over there they avow and de-
Have never once eaten the stuff!
| A Fable
| There were two men and each be-
| lieved himself to be the Most Patient
Man in the world. One had a shrew
for a wife who nagged and heck1ed
him from soon to late but he was al
ways patient with her which of course,
1
| the other had a daughter who had
| returned from boarding school and
corrected his grammar but he never
gave her a harsh word.
OF course each secretly felt that
he was far more patient than the
| other but they never quarreled on the
point and were only too glad to prove
| their greater patience by listening pa
tiently while the other dwelt on his
own patience. One of them was
doctor SO that of course some of his
patients didn't count. And quite
few of them didn't live.
| One hot day they were trying each
others patience by asking each other
if it was hot enough for him when
along came a curious old man in
Bingham tunic and a halo, carrying
a bejewe1ed medal.
| This" he said,t 81 am going to
pin on the Most Patient Man in the
World! So I must be getting along"
But I am her, said the one a bit
out of patience.
Stay! 1 am her, cried the other
impatiently.
"Fools." said the old man. .sTbe
man 1 mean dwelleth in a far parish
Seven times hath his collar slipped
off the collar button in back yet never
once did he scream or curse. HE is
the Most Patient Man in the World!"
Usually the people who are hardest
to please are the least worth pleasing.
Indeed!
In dental work, at any rate
This bit of cheer is found,
He doesn't charge us for the wait.
We're glad of that we'd surely hate
To pay him by the pound!
Il Shucks.
thug relieved him of his watch.
| And when another thief
Relieved him of his roll. he sighed,
n rnl of
/ Alas.
Why must it be Whenever we meet
One We adore upon the street,
We need a pressing of our clothes,
Or sunburn peeleth all our nose?
Ye Gracious Powers! One boon bestow,
One boon, that some day we may know
The joy to meet Her on the street
When we are looking pretty neat.
| There's no one more exasperating
than the man who never says what he
thinks unless it's the man who never
thinks what he says
How to Lay Out a Garden That VIII
Grow Things.
First
Il Lay out
Your
Neighbours
| Hens
Married people may grow to look
alike, but they usually manage to have
a difference between them.
Happy Thought.
Sometimes the woes of living are
those of the liver.
| Sure.
Most every day from Wisdom's hoard
| Some little Truth we're stealing;
| We've noticed when a man is floored
He often hits the ceiling.
The Queer Old Man.
Beside a gate he seemed to sit
His beard was gray and sere;
II saw he did not hear bit
And yet he bit
He sighed as sadly as could be.
1 asked. "Oh, tell why
No hope is in your sighi' Said he,
| For soap is in my eyer
THE wind" 1 talked of other things,
The way it blows is newr'
To no avafl.-He sadly sings,
II know my nose is blue.'
lyon BIRDS" 1 famed his fevered head,
THE pair is full of hasteI''
Alas. he only moaned and said,
| My hair is full or paste!
Now Gomez I said, little riled,
We've had enough of that
In case a chat like ours He smiled,
i I'D rather chase a cat."
There's little more that 1 can tell,
"Why, how you flee.' heard him yell.
And then, '-Whee. how you ny!''
Today's Sheer.
There's nothing so Uncommon as
Common Sense.
Perhaps it's patriotic to wear flag
pasted on your collar and perhaps it's
IouIy idjofir