Honolulu star-bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1912-2010, 1917-01-20
Rine-aIing-aIing!
"HeIIo." sargint Barney cahilI,
Troop, shpeakins."

- ERGEANT, this is Captain Bone
head, Officers Reserve Corps. |
- have just reported to the K. o. at
Headquarters and have heen assigned
as Troop Commander OF Troop for
the next two weeks, which will be
my period of active duty as provided
for in recent legislation by Congress.
| would have reported to you but for
the fact that | have one uniform at
hand, the balance being in my Is
trunks which seemed to have teen
delayed somewhere between here and
Coronado Beach. You know, Ser
geant, it's bad form to appear twice
in the same uniform on the one after
noon.
Barney Cahill-sott0 voce-For the
love of Peter, what's this?)
Just hold the wire a moment, old
chap, want to look up the regula-
lions and Sc what sergeant is: on,
yes, you are non-commissioned Of
ficer, you are one of those soldiers
that wear your insignia Of rank on
the sleeve Of your coat. BY the way,
sergeant, what is your Alma Mater.
Don't understand? See you tomorrow.
Tell the rest of the boys I'll be up to
pay my respects to them in the morn
ing, can't tonight as l have an en-
gagement at the-What did they call
it?-Oh, yes, the Officers Mess. BY
the way, Sergeant, /. have been as
signed quarters No. S2,604, beastly
place, only seven rooms, no elevator
service and no garage attached. Could
you send up my valet at once. the
chef need not report before the morn.
ing as have chatting dish with me.
tThe next day.
Good morning. Mr.. Cahill, l be-
lieve. ] am Captain Bonehead, 'phon-
ed you yesterday. How are the rest
of the boys? Didn't meet any of them
at the Mess last night, had quite
little game; penny ante. What's that
you say?-the men are at the stables
why, strictly uncalled for, desired
to meet them. Let the grooms attend
to the mounts.
You say regimental drill is the or
der OF the day. Don't understand, we
had no such drill at the citizens train
ing camp Iattended last summer.
also have a social engagement down
town, so you may inform the Colonel
our troop will not attend drill for
that reason.
Will ! sign this morning report be-
fore leaving? No, Sergeant, am not
to make any, reports until my two
weeks tour of duty is over and then
make them direct to the authorities
at Washington. l suppose they de-
sire me to inform them as to the state
of efficiency of this particular organi-
zation. You see, at the Summer Train.
ing Camp I was commended for the
flourishing reports could render.
Just carry myself and the Troop A.
w. L. on this report you speak of.
Barney Cahill, in whisper to
Troop Clerk / know how I'll carry
him, IL he don't pull out of here pret-
ty soon. TIN be on a stretcher
THE following afternoon)
First Lieut.. John Welcher, Officers
Reserve Corps, entering J. Troops
orderly room. and meeting Barney
Cahil.
Say, the Main Gazabo, up at head
quarters, told me to report to a Gink
by the name Of Captain Bonehead-
are you the guy? No? we'll. where
can ] find that piece Of cheese? He
don't need 90 think I'm going to run all
over this place looking for him. I'm
on q two weeks vacation and thought
. might Just ~ well take my period
% active duty at this time. Pretty
soft IN your Uncle Sammy. hey?
I'm IN rizht. you see. I'm Assistant
90 the leader % the 9Th Election Dis
trict IN my burg Say. you've got q =,
pretty good place here; could yOu fix
. guy No 90 he could flOp for the
niehti They told me down % that /.
jotnf where the Elie Squeeze HANGS out !
that they would aseien one room and
hath in the Bschelors' Quarters Tor
my use. some time this afternonn .
wouldn't bother 9th the hath bui I
would mke 90 saN of Q few this D. m !
! think I'n beat O. down the pike. So
Ions. CuL
CBarney cahiIf-Thst teller Is 80
tough the measles couldn't break out
on him.
about an hour later the same aft.
erncon
A second lieutenant OF the Off, ers'
Reserve Corps. with a big black cigar
in his mouth. enters the orderly room
wearing an enlisted mans uniform. !
leggings and hat cord.
Sergeant. am md Lieut. Vim. !
Rookie, Officers Reserve Corps:
when not on duty a. such am a pri- |
vate in the Coast Artillery. so you
see understand the game thoroughly !
q nd nothing can he put over me. Now. |