Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1917-03-15
Twice
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A Widows Experience
By ESTHER vANDEvEER
By ESTHER NANDEvEER

Their OF us could remember time
when ID did not exist His fathers
place was but short distance from
ours. Indeed, the rear line marked the
limits of both places. On one side OF
this line was the playground OF the
several children, boys and girls, in
Guiding Edward and myself, who lived
in the neighborhood. | can remember
as far back AS when | was seven years
old and Edward nine that IN playing
keep house he and | always played the
part OF husband and wife. There was
swing on this playground, ana Ed
wards father put up articles for a
boys gymnasium little house -four
or tive feet high was built for US girls
and furnished with toy furniture. AT
times we would leave our dolls there
all night. first putting them to bed
When | grew taller | could not un-
derstand how | could have stood up
right in that little house. Aud what
seemed more remarkable TO me was that
Edward could have done SO, for he was
always large child. And | remember
that when he had been away TO school
for long while and came back he was
taller than the house
BY this time we were growing ont of
childhood into that intermediate period
when, though boys and girls may feet
love. they are not likely to express IL.
1t is n period 81 transition from child
love to real love The boy mind is taken
up with athletic sports. while the girl
hides her secret almost from herself.
Indeed, So uebulous is this period that
in my own case il is difficult for me 10
recall my exact feelings | remember
them family and as existing at inter
walls. They were rather i small portion
of my girls existence than the whole
of il.
When ! was sixteen / was awakened
TO the true condition by the marked
preference displayed 10y another girl
for my Edward from tia! time my
love became the principal instead OF a
minor part iu my life Jailed 10 con
cea my jealousy from him. and this
brought out his own Consciousness OF
what was between MS There was no
formal declaration. no conventional
giving OF the hand. not even the loy.
ers' kiss lie merely sald something
about the other girl. ! know not what.
but il assured me there was no change
III our position since thu days when
we played husband and wife AZ Keep
ing housc--uo change IN the position.
but Il great change Ia tie condition
II had then been like a winter bud but
il was now swollen under spripg sun.
ready 10 put forth leaves.
sometimes wished that ! could have
experienced the proposal that other
girls seemed to regard the ncXt mos
important moment Ia their lives to
their marriage Edward aud ! had uo
occasion tor Il proposal our love was
rather. a. ! have said. an unfolding OF
bud than the birth OF butterfly
The only abrupt part OF II was when
he gave me the first kiss. treasured
that in lieu of proposal.
When we were married great changes
had occurred I had uceu teft alone lii
the world. 50 II was arranged thar we
should occupy my house our living
room vas OF the second door over.
looking the playground where we had
pretended 60 "a husband anu wife
The faint dream OF childhood had been
developed % realization OF almost
perfect happiness. II there could be
perfection ON earth these hgc years OF
my life. from twenty To- twenty-five.
were such condition Two children
were born 10 MS. a boy aud girl.
What seemed strange to me was that.
though | gave them bourdless love.
that which bore their father. instead
OF heiuc diminished, was increased
Truly love must be- like space infinite
Up 10 this point there had been al
expansion II happiness Suddenly
there came a check our younger
child sickcncd and died have de
scribed with Sornc minuteness what
have likened 70 the gradual unfolding
OF a dover have no heart 10 give
more than a brief mention OF its blight
ing Within few months after the
first death second occurred. ami
within another year ! iosi my husband
For time | was in a sort of col.
lapse. In which ! did not take enough
interest In my surroundings to be az
fected by them After one has met
with a serious accident or has been
operated upon by surgeon the senses
are deadened; then comes the begin.
ming Of pain II was so with me
When became myself my surround
ings were painful 10 me Some per
sons similarly situated nurse their
grief by living in such surroundings
longed 90 get away from them
Friends advised mo TO seek recovery
In the many new stcnc> ana interest
Ing objects that are 70 be found abroad
took their advice. sailed for Eu
rope. leaving the place where I had
been 50 happy la the hands Of IN agent
for sale. One thing was resolved
upon never 60 return 90 it.
II may be- considered that my story
is one OF coincidence 1t is more than
that. II is an illustration OF tlp very
different conditions that may otcur IN
the Ute az u single person Masters
Of romance have maintained that there
should be Id SONG uf story but one
love Piaywrights never bring % sec
ond on to the STAGE. They portray
rather romance than real HE and DO
not give an that real life necds They
are of the same order as the people of
india who believe Tint the wife should