Ripley County democrat., 1917-05-11
NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS., NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS..
THE CROsS-EYED COOK

Mr.. and Mrs Brooks Had been mar
ried only q few months. but already
they had had nine coolss. and most Of
the time had been without servant
at all. After each aud every departure
Of the presiding danes Of the culinary
department of the Brooks household,
Mrs. Brooks declared TINT she was sick
and tired of fooling with them. and
that thereafter she would do all the
cooking with her own fair hands. Mrs.
Brooks was long on enthusiasm. but .
trife short on experience and skin,
and. after week or two OF wheat
cakes with all the taste and juciness
OF asbestos, chops with all the endur-
ance and elasticity Of rope-ends. and
coffee that tasted like chill tonic,
Mr.. Brooks was wont to declare that
she was simply wearing herself to a
frazzie; that be wasn't going to have
II any longer. and that q cook must be
Immediately signed op.
II was on the frst evening after they
had moved into a new fiat, and Just
OTTER hr. Brooks had taken q stand Of
this sort that Mrs. Brooks announced
that she had that dny engaged new
cook. who had promised to appear on
the following morning.
On his return home from the Office
the following evening. instead Of Mrs.
Brooks. he met al the door Of the
fiat an apparItion that made him give
perceptible start before he could
control himself. II was huge, b0ny,
white.turbnned negress. with a com.
plexion Of Styglan blackness and the
cross-eyedest pair Of cross-eyes that
Brooks had ever seen 10 human be-
( Ing.
He walked back into the fat won
-dering where his wife could be. That
person came bouncing In almost ut
that instant. explaining that she had
Just run out for some flowers, the oc-
casion being one thats seemed to call
for some celebration "Haye you seen
herr" she demanded.
"0h. It's q her, IL itr said Mr.
Brooks. -Tm glad yon told me or |
might not have known. Yes, have
seen her. and l am stifi trIfie weak
from the SHOCK"
-What is the name Of this ill-favored
daughter of Ham7"
-Gwendolyn," replied Mrs. Brooks.
-Gwendolyn," repeated her husband.
sinking weakly down iupon couch.
Il was very agreeable odor that
smote Mr.. Brooks nostrils as he lifted
the cover from Gwendolyn's dishes.
And they proved to be no false her
aids Not many times In his life had
he snt down to so satisfying meal,
he soon found himself saying. Slipping
q cup OF delicious coffee, Mr.. Brooks
III cigar, pushed his chair back from
the table, and forthwith pronounced
the gargoylian Gwendoiyu the original
pearl OF great price. Mr.. Brooks, In
fact was 80 pleased and satisfied that
he could not resist the. temptation to
tease his young wife little.
Il might have known. though he
said glponiIy, 'thnt there would be
sonic thorn TO the rose. How could
you hase deliberately invited bad luck
by bringing q cross-eyed negro into
the fiat Just US we have moved into
itr
Mrs. Brooks looked Up In alarm. Her
eyes widcned. why. really, are they
bad iuck7" she inquired anxiously.
Are they bad lucki~ be repeated
solemnly. "Do you mean to tell u1e
that you've lived almost twenty-five
years and never heard thnt about d
cross-eyed negro. why. my dear child.
they're almost the worst luck there lar
How dreadful I" exclaimed Mrs.
Brooks, looking as II some horrible ca
laInity hnd already befal!en. .what
are we going to do about it3r
Nothing said Dir. Brooks. aWe1I
Just stand pat. You see II may be
years and years before this bad luck
happens SO there's no uss worrying
about It."
Meals at the Brooks dat continued
to be enjoyable. Gwendolyu remained
gloomy and silent. but sha proved her
self . born cook. and Brooks wended
his way homeward every evening with
great satisfaction In the thought or the
dinner that was waiting him.
II was a month or two after Gwendo-
lyn's initial triumph that Mr. Brooks
went home one evening and found hls
wife cooking dinner and also herself
IN the kitchen, She explained that Il
was 0wendolyn's Afternoon on.
Il was after her husband had eaten
braveIy through the meal that Mra
Brooks gathered herself together and
suddenly burst ont:
"John. just nov | told you only 4
hnif truth. II is the COOKS day Oh. but
she isn't coming back any more"
"What7" almost sIarieked Mr..
BrooRs. -what has happenedy
i've discharged herr said MrH
Brooks sipost tearfuIly.
discharges herr" shouted M.
Brooks -What does al this mean r
~Well. you see. Harry. Il was ike
thls." began Mrs Brooks trembIlngly.
y was feeling lonesome today while
you were gone. and | picked up 1 novel
telling ahout . young bride who lost
her husband on their honeymoon. and