Free trader-journal. (Ottawa, Ill.) 1916-1920, 1917-01-05
BEES AND
MATRIMONY
By M. QUAD
By M. QUAD
Copyright. 1916. by the Mcclure
Newspaper Syndicate.

Certain persons were always won
derlng why Baker did not smile or
laugh. but he was born that way and
couldn't help it.
When Mrs. Baker died. after many
years of quiet life. she left daughter,
Minnie seventeen years old. Minnie
was totally unlike her father. She
saw the humor of things. She was In
clined TO be cheerful and gay. She
had always laughed more or less. and
her father had become used to it, as
she had to his solemnness.
When the mother died the daughter
took up the housekeeping, and two
years had passed when she and Frank
Williams fell In love. Frank was II
pushing, industrious young man, and
he could at least have given her as
good a home as she had. He was
rather afraid of the solemn faced ia
Their, but had now and then called ut
the house and been we'll received.
Young Williams had opened COM
mission house. The farmers brought
him In stuff to sell, and he shipped 1t
to the city. When he was receiving
or shipping, his goods covered a good
part Of the sidewalk, but no one COM
planned One day as Mr. Baker was
strolling about he approached the COM
mission house just as farmer had
unloaded four big baskets of eggs.
There was room for Mr. Baker to
avoid those eggs, and he would have
avoided them but for a big rat. The
rodent ran from under the sidewalk
to q lumber pile, and Mr.. Bakers at
tention was thus distracted for the
moment. He walked along with his
head turned over his shoulder when
his foot struck one of the baskets, and
he fell forward with crash. AS was
afterward ascertained he broke all his
previous records by breaking twenty.
one dozen of the eggs. When he man.
aged to extrlcate himself from the
mess he was covered from head to
heel with the white and yellow yolks
of the eggs.
the humor Of things, and, though the
loss Of the eggs would be his. he fairly
roared with laughter at the upset.
No one could remember ever seeing
Lemuel Baker in temper, but he was
mad now as he rose up amid those
eggs. Hearing the Laughter at the door,
young Williams came out Of his Office,
and, instantly recognizing his prospec.
tive father-n-law, he began to laugh
too.
"You scoundrels, you villains" roar
ed Mr.. Baker as he stood dripping witt
the yolks.
1t was when he heard the victims
voice that young Williams came for
ward and expressed his sympathies.
$50 away, sir; 60 away"' was shout
cd at him. sYou had those eggs placed
there on purpose to trip me up. LOol
at me! My clothes are ruined. Don
ever enter my house again or ! viii
give you lawsuit
At the back end Of Mr.. Bakers hal
acre lot he had placed three hives o.
bees. There had been no trouble will
them, and they had paid in honey FOL
their keep. One day as the owner sal
IN Lio 'FRONT.' voro ,do In bio chirt clooyas
looking down the village street and
Minnie was upstairs in her room
grieving over the events which had
caused separation between the low
ers wandering COW appeared upon
the scene. She looked over the back
fence Of Mr.. Bakers lot, and she saw
cabbages, cornstalks and other good
things to eat She also took notice
that the fence was old and shaky. She
was tempted and yielded. She crashed
over the fence between two Of the bee
hives and brought them both tumblins
down, and the crash was heard for O
block around. The bees went for her.
Mr.. Baker was the next victim, an(
he hurried through the front gate
and went downhill toward the peace
fully flowing river His yclls brough
out the rest Of the population, and a.
fast as they appeared Mt their doors
or gates the bees gave them all prop
or attention. 1t was figured later OF
that at least 200 people, besides thu
COW, received scars to show that the.
had fought calamity and we'll Mr.
Baker kept on to the river Amid hi
pain and excitement he recollecte,
that bees and water are enemies. IT.
get rid of the bees he must have tn,
aid Of the river. He could not swim
stroke, and the water was deep, bu
when he reached the bridge over tn
rail he dived.
The COW had no river to plunge into
and she had TO keep on, believing n
every jump until she fell exhausted
AS fate would have it. young William
was at hand to plunge into the rive
to the rescue Of the man who had dis
appeared beneath the surface, and
was mostly by his efforts that rescu
was made. He it was who comman
dcercd wagon and got Mr.. Bake