The Nevada County picayune., 1917-11-15
THE BUY AT HOME DEPARTMENT.
Farmer Smiths Bitter Lesson
BARGAINS" ARE 4 DELUSION
After Unpaekins Goods, Quickly Goes Buys and Makes Vow Never Again to patronixe Catalogue House-No More Wonder Book Stuff

Buys and Makes Vow Never Again
 to Pstronixe Catalogue House-No
 More Wonder Book Stuff.
 Copyrighted. 1914. by Thomas J. suIlivanl
 Experience is the name men give their follies and their sorrows. It Is the successive disenchantment of the things Of fife
 It is reason enriched by the spells of the heart. Al least that is Smiths fin. depreciation of experience
 Disasreeable Brand of Wetncss.
 One December it happened that the weather man seemed 10 couspire with the mail order man He turned out a dIsagreeabe brand of wetness that All. ed the farmers with a dtstaste for the "open road" that David Grayson so optimistleany praises in all seasons.
 But all farmers are not optimistic. like David
 Farmer Smith liked the comfort Of his sheltered home So he naturally was attracted by an invitation from the mall order house to sit down in an easy chair before the fire and select his Christmas supplies from the pages of wonder book left at his front gate by the R. F D. man
 Wonder Book Solves Problem. The idea seemed mighty attractive and comfortable He thought he might as well experiment once anyway
 So he and his wife had nice time filling out the yellow order slip accord l ing to their needs and revenue.
 Then they sent it on its way to the firm which promised them thrilling bar gains in all lines of merchandise from pins 10 palaces.
 The Smiths had made one trip to town The day had been characterized by haste, hunger and worry They hadn't had time to buy what they wanted.
 So the catalogue seemed to solve the problem for them. It seemed as If 1t were going to save them lots of time. energy, money and brain flag.
 Shipment Arrives.
 It was a beautiful pre-Christmas dream made up in four measures Of 1 comfort confidence, curiosity and hope l The awakening came afterward. like i wise the disillusionmen.
 Their shipment arrived two days be 1 fore Christmas This WIS very reas- surfing But 1t necesstated special drive of nine miles to the nearest ex- press office.
 The C. O. D. express charges were unexpectedly high. The first intima- ton of a mistake came with the real jyation that the express charges eI ceeded the difference In price between l home store and catalogue house arti | cles
 Traffic had been congeSted ana the passage rough. Damage WIS visible. l Smith hoped 1t wasn't serious. but be took his stun home with unpleasant forebodings. and that night when the family was asleep he and his wife opened the package in the Kitchen.
 Caused Smith to Swear
 There was lot of excelsior 10 un pack. but when the work was done and the contents stood revealed there was a verbal fireworks display on the part of Smith. who forgot for the moment that he was deacon in the church, and Mrs. Smiths tears were bitter.
 The parlor lamp was a scream. It's embellishments were llvId enough to light colerrd Baptist eharrh without the aid ot acetY YleI,~
 The handcran HlItrahels looked as | if il had been ma1r uH q sWeatshop machine. intendrd t"t oreraiia. z The l guariutccd pure wool Overcoat assur' cd them .at a g4eAer now thoroughly they had been H""r"d
 PnSsne eb lhe'.I,, 'au.e at lire ''ai legged bafganlS, the gnhl st"rhiu- was the piece de res.-laI.= e#of theIr Christmas feast lt wa> i ttrtattp af fair decorated win green and red yarn Msseis and filled with junk that represented the discard of one cent novelty stock and eIuded suggestions of bacteria from top to toe.
 Dc Shopping at Home.
 Ths stocking was the fnsl straw. ke1t morning Smith hitched up old K.s,. and ne and bis wife pioddsd to town again through the slusb to get . bona nde supply of Christmas gtftA.
 What they bought then had the guar snte- of the manufacturer. the dealer ana their own eyes, for by this time the smiths were strictly from Missouri l They had had their lesson.
 Btit how many thousands Of Smiths and Joneses fin this country who have | had q lesson, but hesitate-fn fact, ab- soiutely Tefrain-from letting their neighbors and friends know that they hay. been through the same expert cnce
 The reason that they do not admit il is easily explained in few words