Arizona republican., 1917-08-12
For Sale Miscellaneous
RORD'S ROYHOOD FRANKS

FORD'S BOYHOOD FRANKS
 Boy, which is the road to Sacramen- to?"-"Show the stranger" said "Gran- n.y." popping her head out, and if he desire thee to go a mile go with him tWain' Granny was very religious. and had followed her teachings. today l would be a long visaged, graveyard old pelican, looking disgustedly @ on all female beauty, and classic form; believe me tho such is not the case, not on your tintype. We'll, away we went, and picking up Cub, on the road, dropped the stranger and struck straight for the mudhOle swamp where soon against all admonitions, we were yelling, splashing. padding, and chuck ing mud balls, until thoroughly ex- hausted Very unfortunately Granny with sister, sought wild berries that 1 day, and coming close to where Cub" and I were stretched in slumberous de- light, she determined punishment, by taking my clothes.-Horror of horforsi l went to dress, and too plainly did the l truth dawn for there were tracks giv- ing the clue, to my Respondent heart, of Georgie's downfall Fearful male dictions followed and then, like our sinning(?) forefather, I began to look
 
 at hand, Cub" and I settled on the drum head tulu, which in Moses i day was the 'bulrushes" that saved his bacon, and now was to keep from the gaping crowd a peep of Georgie's , vitals and form. Carefully arranging each stalk, till the body was encircled, a band placed at waist and beneath arms to support the stalks, and an ex- I tra twist to make all secure we started out, feeling quite humorous in what l termed "Geronimos war dress" All went smoothly until sweat, grime. blis- tered feet, and the sweltering sun, com menced their destructive and painful work after which "The Devil' seemed l to take possession First came the bursting of the tulu drum heads, scat 1 tering the yellow fibre all over my l body, to which it tenaciously clung; then moisture expanded the leaf belt 1 ing, allowing all stalks save what l could hug on breast, to slip through and then as the red dust fell and mingled with the already mottled GOV
 ering, I tell you Barnum never pre- 1 scented a monster to equal the present spectacle Cub" had "cut" me and gone ahead to notify. the gang, who 1 shortly appeared, yelling, Look at the Zulu Chief" Barnum now has 8 l rival,' "Zaccus has come down." David is here full of locusts and honey," and all such trash until final ly anger overcoming me, I let drive at Cub" and Gracious Peteri" down came all remaining bullrushes, leaving my poor body as bare as an artists model Aghast I stood, for the mo- ment, then bursting into a flood of tearn l dropped to mother earth, a lifeless mass All this had occurred fronting the hedge where lived my "Sarey Jane" who tremblingly had watched the melee. until she saw me collapse, when with womanly fervor and instant forethought, she rushed for Granny, { both of whom in a jiffy returned. fran tic and crazed. One look from Gran n.y. sufficed. as the poor soul threw up both arms, and falling over my inan- innate body, screamed My boy! My boy. Forgive me. Forgive mel Then she completely sWooned insensihle Both she and I were now thought dead and the little burg was in such uproar as was never before seen. We were carried to shelter where l, first came to life, and in spasmodic boyish grief begged and cried for pardon. hugging poor tyranny as tnouSh l had mas sacred her in cold blood. She soon re- vived however, and in those skinny arms, with pulu and red grime cover ing us, we were indeed in ecstasy for 9 time, as eaca begged forgiveness, and promised every good thing for the flu ture. Those promises were kept. The old soul has long since gone but were she here, "her boy" would be a fal better man, as you all will agree.
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