The Pensacola journal. (Pensacola, Fla.) 1898-1985, 1917-12-18
MARRIED LIFE.
By Mebel Herbert Urner.

The Letter Helen Writes to Warren
and the Letter She Sends to
Him.
Wednesday, May 3rd-
Dear Warren:-
1t is not quite ten, but the whole
house is quiet. They all go to bed
here SO early. But , cannot sleep.
And somehow want to write to you.
Dear, if only I could have taken
this visit. feeling that everything
enjoyed it. But as it is, I have been
here only day, already I am ner-
vous and restless and thinking con-
stantly of you. l am wondering if
things will be any better when l re-
turn.
"Oh, Warren WHY: can't we get
along? When l love you so much;
when / am willing to do almost any
thing to make you happy, why do
you make it so hard?
At times it seems that | can do
nothing to please you, shat every
thing l say and do only irritates
you.
Do you realize that for months
my attitude has been a strained eff
fort to concilliate you, to avoid your
humor? Surely that is not the prov
ince of a wife.
Had She Been Assertive.
Sometimes L feel it would have
been much better if 1 had been more
assertive and not tried so hard TO
please you; if l had made you un-
derstand in the very beginning that
my happiness must be considered as
well as yours.
/ think my very servility. my
eagerness to appease you, has, in it
self become to you source of irri-
tation. And yet, how can | change
now? In the few times L have tried,
you have only crushed me down and
have not had the courage, or the
strength to stand out against you.
Oh, Warren-Warren l am afraid
of the future-afraid of what it
holds for us. | did not tell you that
mother said if we did not have this
temporary separation now. we would
have much longer one later on.
Don't you realize what this
mans?
If mother, even in her short visit
with us, felt we could not go on much
longer, that we were fast approach
ing a time when-Oh, I cannot put
it into words.
And yet I believe that, in your
heart, you love me. At least l know
you love no one else. Whatever else
1 have had to bear in these two years
of married life, it has not been that.
Somehow, now that | am away
clearly than I did, and that is what
am hoping my absence will do for
you.
The Meeting With Will.
And Warren, something happened
on the trip out here that brought to
me an even stronger realization of
what your attitude to me has be-
comet was the meeting of Will
Farrell on the train.
In the hurried note l wrote on our
arrival last night / did not tell you
that he was on the train with us all
the way to Indianapolis. We met him
in the dining car and he insisted on
mother and I having dinner with him.
And, until he left US at Indianapolis,
he was so kind. so thoughtful, and
did so many little things to con-
tribute to our comfort, hardly know
how to tell you-how to explain
what effect all this had upon me- 1t
has been so long since | have re-
ceived any attentions of that kind.
With the exception of the few
months before Winifred's birth, do
you know how little consideration I
have had from you? Oh, Warren,
you can't imagine how / must feel
when just the ordinary courtesy of
friend should mean so much to me.
l am writing this because there
are some things easier to write than
say. When we are together our
thoughts are usually on the point of
dissension that is uppermost at the
time. But now that we are separat-
ed I see things more as whole. And
/ am hoping that YOU
Unfinished and not sent)