The Washington herald., 1917-05-29
New York, Day by Day
BY o. o. MCINTYRE.

Special Correspondent of The Washington HerAld
New York May 2s.-As Samuel Pepys
would record in his diary: Up early
and by gasoline buggy to Glen Cove and
find no one home but the caretaker-a
lonely old soul-who had not seen hu-
man being for fortnight. He dis
coursed learnedly on the war, million
aires and hewed the Kings English. let
ting the split infinitives fall where they
may.
To Tarrytown for late breakfast with
II. Warner, the actor, and he tells me
the comical story of the villager who
went to shyrurgeon to ask about his
peculiar condition. you know" said
the patient, sometimes it seems like I
see a dog comm down the street 1t
will look as real and then it will stop.
scratch itself, and then I can see 1t go
around the corner"
We'll, maybe it Is a dog" said the
chyrurgeon.
The villager paused and finally said:
We'll, maybe It is"
Home in the late afternoon and the
serving maid tells me that an officer of
the law called and worried and fretted
about what particular crime they had
caught me at at last Unable to work,
~ NiiS AASoiCSl pEGGlHCl, anu Sdpls
Vaughn Informed me that my yearly po-
lice card was waiting there for me. In
great glee l went out and bought a two
pound box OF candy for my wife, poor
wretch.
In the evening to r. Brinkerhofr's new
studio to birthday and find a gay crowd
and see c. Chambers and NJ, Justis, the
artists, and r. Goldberg, the sketcher,
and NJ. Justus and Mistress Justus dance
the tango with great skill
For walk home through the park anc
ma a young white puppy on the path
and 1t licked my hand and snuggled down
in the pocket OF my great coat and am
fearful that 1 will find the owner there
OF albeit with two dogs and the increas-
ing price Of puppy biscuits I fear I will
be unable to take vacation this season.
And so home and to bed.
Ring Lardner, the Chicago sporting
writer, had an interview with Gen. JofTre
while on one OF his monthly dashes to
New York to talk back to magazine
editors The conversation. according to
friends, was about as follows:
see by the apresmldi newspapers"
said NJ. Lardner, that you are going
to witness a ball game"
En- partie," replied NJ. Jofrre. "Of
course, we are in les Etats-Unis for le
plaisir and with so much temps to kill 1
thought l would like ct see the boys touer
la bale. I have always been derange
to see Les Cincinnati Rouges jouer a la
balle"
Cincinnati is your favori neuf?"
"Certainement." said NJ. Joffre. II
read that NJ. Merkle is now lie premier
basehomme"
"OuP' replied IArdner-and then
friends dragged him away to prevent
further assaults on the French language
Dinner in a theatrical boarding house
tuggler and his wife accuse the
glowering landlady OF favoring an in
terpretive dancer by giving her more
food. But the interpretive dancer pays
little attention. She has misplaced her
two yards of chiffon and fears she can
not do her act that night A song and
dance team enters. The landlady remarks
that certain gentlemen" seem to think
she Is running an "eely-monestary'' in
stitution. The team does not look up. A
slovenly maid enters with some soup and
places 1t before long and lean magician.
He takes one sip. "A chicken went
through this soup. in a sumbarine," he
snorts. All the guests laugh but the song
and dance artists"
All of this is a part Of a moving
picture scenario that was received by a
prominent film concern. And what is
more It was written by a man of big
business affairs. He should stick to his
dollar making.