The Daily Missoulian. [volume] (Missoula, Mont.) 1904-1961, 1917-11-26
CampComedies
,By Alma Woodward.

scene: camp Lewis. lime: Even
ing.
tThc increased circulation of certain
papers Is accounted for in the looks
of the barracks room. open at sport :
ing page and comic section. they up
holster tables chairs and floor
A docking up from article he's read
ins)-Do any Of you fellows know
anything about the wonderful war H.
brary that's sprung into being"
+ y tdryly)-Thc only thing in the
at me is One Thousand Ways to Kid
4 Baked Beam" and Sunny Sayings
Of u Saturnine Sausage" From the
tone of the books get you'd think
cooks were writing 'cm.
G (firmly)Yeh. and from the tone
Of the eats get you'd think writers
were cooking 'em,
A (diSdainfully) Gosh. YOU fellows
are getting self-centered. Don't you
suppose the rest OF the world is going
on just the same outside this camp !.
Can't YOU imagine anything but what
YOU get to eat and how long you can,
sleep? BY war library" ! mean book
that fellows who are in the war are
writing. Not trained writer's. either
People are buying them like hot cakes
and the guys are cashinS in solid or
EN-. They just put down what the!
see-what makes an impression or
thcm-and OF course It's thrilling Il
people 5000 miles away.
c twho'd picked holes in u GOLD
mine)-Yeh, but were onl! 50 mile.
away.
A (squclching himD Don't yo,l sup
pose even this camp is interesting tt
people who don't have to he here
Why do you think they come here IL
drovcs and
G (rctortinG promptly)---Scarch rue
There's a bunch Of nuts in every pro
fession.
ignoring the interruptlon,-
They're curious and come down t.
nose around. that's what.
& lonEins to get to the poinD -
Well. what's the heavy idea, boy:
can see there's something fancier thar
hair Weighing on your top piece. Tn
load.
A imcditatively)- was just think
| ing as | read this article. that Il lttl,
| extra cash wouldn't go astray in th
| bunch. Why can't we boys write ;
| book. firsthand--on camp life. AS w
| find it
| II twhining,--Why do have /,
| write it'll can tell how ! find it i,
! two words maybe T could condens
| it into one~-at a pinch
\ continuing Just the plain cy
cryday. unvarnished truth--straigh
from the shoulder You don't have 4
! hiShbroW about ii or use any eXtr
expressions. or anything. And be
thered be a, big sale for it. We'd cal
IL Around the Clock at Yaphank.
| What do YOU say?
generously Ill try anythin
once. But | gotta have my name o
the cover.
ieagcrly>-All right, YOU can hay
Your name on the cover. Now Just 70
tun--for Il tryout-l'm going to divid
our day into four equal parts and Civ
each chap IA
{ tdrcamily)-Oh. listen. for tn
love of Pete. and see If YOU can't o,
yourself in the way of earning a littl
extra coin in a perfectly legitima,
way.
\ tsitting crcct)-Andrcw. Do yo
call 1t legitimate for me to try I
: write?
L (ncrvously) Go on and divide II
day. kid--,and give US all IL slice.
A tseriouslyy-Bill YOU take fro
D: so Il. m. to 80: Charlie from o.
to 1880 p. M: Dan from 1880 to 5:3
and III do from 5:30 on. Just wri
the thing that in,presses you most
that part OF the day and don't u
any extra words~-be simple In expires
sion. Now, write.
During the next five minutes the
l is much looking slkyward. much clca
ing of threats and much biting Of pel
Gil points. After u while A puts dow
r his pencil.)
n 4 (gleefully)-Now everybody re;
g what he's written. Bill. you're first,
b (brfefiyD-f've written lust q
d word-"beans''
p Chorus Indignantly --Aw, tina,
o what Eve written, What're v
Grabbing my stuff tor
E44 .4sTg - - 49,.