Free trader-journal. (Ottawa, Ill.) 1916-1920, 1917-11-21
MESS COOK BIG
MAN Of ARMY
Even Company Officers Have to
Be ColSiderata to the lleW
AutoCrat.
NOBODY "BiWlS HIM OUT"
Any Kicks or GrumblinJ Against the
Worst Cook Are Made in Private
and Out Of His Earshot--
Word Is Final.

Field Headquarters. American Expc
dictionary Forces. France.-"Who's the
great hero in the estimation of the pri
Yates In the American armyf" asks the
man interested in the psychology OF
soldering.
''The commanding general, o'
course" interrupts his companion, an,
noyed at the apparently foolish ques-
ton.
"Naw, not him. | amt never seen
him even" replies a private, kicking
his hobnailed shoes into the turf.
"Your captain. then" suggests the
wise friend, coming down several
ranks.
Jaw, he's all right and we're nj
ways there 10 salute him. but there's
Others" says the private.
How about your top sergeant, a
veteran 'nnncom with rough talk and
strong right?" asks the friend, losing
confidence.
Were all for him, hut there's others
Just as good as him too" insists the
private.
put us next. who's the boss of the
company" the first questioner insists.
"The cook who else?" chorus half 4
dozen.
That's the hero-the company cook,
writes JnniuS +. Wood. in The Chicag go
Daily News. The cook may be hot
and grouchy, his uniform greasy and
his eyes red from smoke, hut he is the
most respected man in the mess. That
is. If he is a good cook. Even If he
isn't a good cook. indeed is a very poor
cook. which is unusual for our army,
nobody "bawls him ont" TO his face as
they might even do to a sergeant major
who isn't much of n scrapper. Any
kicks or grumbling against even the
worst cook are made in private and out
of his earShot
"Say. cook. gimme another helpin' Of
the stun gullonT" asks q soldier,
coming up with his tin mess kit
secured clean with a hunk of bread of
all traces Of the first helping of stew.
mo seconds, tonight replies the
mess sergeant.
saw, be a good fellow, I'm nearly
starved begs the soldier.
"Nothn' doin'. some Of the fellows
haven't got here yet, beat It,"
HIess Cook Is Boss.
American soldiers are always hungry
and a stand-in with the mess cook is
equivalent to one with the landlady's
daughter if you want the second piece
Of pie" He is the company autocrat
Anybody who has suddenly dropped
into n strange company about mess
time knows that the chances of dining
well. though he may be obliged to
squat on the ground, hold the mess
plate in one hand and feed with the
other, are better If the first call Is
made on the mess sergeant than If II is
made on the captain. The captain
possibly eats off q table made out of m
Did box. Certain formaities. however,
are observed among officers. The cap
tain may not always volunteer as host,
and it Is not good form to invite your
self.
"Say, sarg, any chance of Drumming
some ch0w?' is a good formula.
always can scrapc the old pan for
hungry man" Is his usual reply.
Don't want to crowd you, and |
haven't mess kit either" you say.
Guess I've got an extrn one around.
I'll fix you up all right" he says, and
you eat.
The American army eats well but ii
figures closely. Rati0ns are drf wn for
exactly the number of men ind the
exact number of days that they are TO
eat. II is up to the mess sergeant and
his cooks to see that everybody gets
his share of everything and THAI moth
Ing Is left over. That means cl de fig
uring with only his eyes and a big
spoon to measure by.
Not Too Many Cooks.
For each infantry company rf 204