davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Grand Forks herald., 1917-03-22

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Ak-a-AS-
Perth Amboy evening news., 1917-01-17
BASEBALL TODAY

Baseball players, we are told, are
going to join the American Fedora
ton of Labor Why shouldn't they?
Is not the actors union affiliated with
the A. F. of L.? If is it not, it has
Just as much right to belong TO that
organization as any other body Of
men working for a living.
Baseball is no longer a sport, 1t
is a money-making proposition pure
and simple. Men play baseball for
pay just as an actor acts for pay. 1t
is a means of making living. There
Is now no difference between going
to a baseball game or going to the
theatre. Both are conducted 10
amuse and entertain people, and men
are paid to do the amusing and en-
tertaining. The greater the star the
greater the salary, and so on.
Baseball is so far commercialized
that even O little so-called home"
team cannot be organized without
the players insisting upon knowing
"how much is there in it for me-"
The game is no longer played for the
games sake: no longer do young
men play baseball for the glory of
the old home town. Most of the
baseball players today would just as
readily play on the team that Is op-
posing the home nine If the opposing
team offered more money.
Even the crowds that watch the
score boards so constantly-the So
called "fans"-are not so much in
terested in the game as they are in
the pool they are playing. They
are interested in the success of q
certain team, not because of any
particular pride in that team, but be-
cause the success Of that team means
that they win the pool for that
week.
= Baseball has deteriorated. 1t IS
purely another form of business SIM
liar to the theatrical business. The
real lover Of genuine sport must turn
to college football, where the players
play for the love of the college.
BY all means let the baseball play
ers join the labor union and strike
to enforce their demands upon their
employers. Why not?
Perth Amboy evening news., 1917-01-17
DRUGS EXCITE YOUR
KIDNEYS, USE SALTS
If Your Back Hurts or Bladder
BotherS, Drink Lots of
Water.

When your kidneys hurt and your
back feels sore, don't get scared and
proceed to load your stomach with q
lot of drugs that excite the kidneys
and irritate the entire urinary tract
Keep your kidneys clean like you
keep your bowels clean, by flushing
them with a mild. harmless salts which
removes the body's urinous waste and
stimulates them to their normal ac-
tivity. The function of the kidneys
is to filter the blood. In "a hours they
strain from 1t 500 grains of acid and
waste. so we can readily understand
the vital Importance of keeping the
kidneys active.
Drink lots of water--you can't drink
too much: also get from any pharna-
cist about four ounces Of Jad Salts;
take tablespoonful In a glass of
water before breakfast each morning
for a few days and your kidneys Will
act fine. This famous salts is made
from the acid OF grapes and lemon
Juice. combined with lithia, and has
been used for generations to clean and
stimulate clogged kidneys; also to
neutraliZe the acids In urine 10 1t no
longer fs q source of irritation, thus
ending bladder weakness.
Jad Salts Is inexpensive: cannot In
1ure: makes q delightful effervescent
Whitewater drink which everyone
should take now and then to keep their
kidneys clean and active. Try this,
also keep up the water drinking, and
no doubt you will wonder what became
Of your kidney trouble and bacxachs.
ADV.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1917-01-17
Why Little Tommy Jones Made Ex.
ceedingIy Small Progress With
His Grammar Lesson.

The teacher was teaching her pupils
grammar.
"Now, Tom Jones'" she said to an in
telligent youngster in the front seat Of
the class. "A is the indefinite article,
you see and must only be used with
the singular number. You say a man,
but you can't say a men, can your
"Yes, I can," replied Tommy. II can
say a men, too, like father does after
his prayers"
Come. Tommy, no jokes" replied
the teacher, reprovingly; decline
he"
"Nominative he, possessive his, ob-
jectjve him."
"Now, you can't say him book but
you can say his book"
eyes, I do say hymn book too," said
Tommy, with chuckle.
Each one Of these sallies made teach
er smile in spite of herself.
"But now, Tommy, seriously, just at
tend to the active and passive verb.
Now, I strike is active, you see, be-
cause If you strike you do something.
But I am struck is passive, because If
you are struck you don't do anything,
do you"
"Yes, do; strike back again."
After this the teacher gave him up
as a bad job.-Exchange.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1917-01-17
Our Daily Special.
The Late Husband Gets the Devil.
Lake McIuke Saws

Lake McIuke Says
It may seem paradoxical But a
polished man should never cast re-
Elections.
The woman whose husband looks
like something that she got with trad
ing stamps imagines that the Chorus
Girls Union and the Dizzy Blondes
Union were organized for the purpose
of kidnapping her lesser half.
That Western pastor who announces
that the automobile is a menace to re-
ligion must have purchased either a
new tin Henry or a secondhand One
nineowefiver.
A woman can take an old canary
bird cage and some ribbon and make
a pretty nifty hat out of them. But a
man couldn't do it.
Isn't it funny how Honest and Up
right a man feels when the other fell
low gets caught and he doesn't?
About this time of year the last
crop of June Brides are coming down
to breakfast in the morning wearing
greasy kimonos and with their hair
wadded into door knobs on the backs
of their heads.
1t is hard to tell by early appear
ances. We doubt if there was ever a
President Of this country who took
prize at baby show.
never get homesck is because they are
never home long enough to get sick of
1t.
Another reason why we send our
sons to college is because when they
graduate they can come home and
sneer at how little we know.
The Bible teaches us Humility.
That's why a congregation builds a
100000 church and hires a $4,000
preacher.
You will never make hit with a
middle-aged woman by telling her that
she Is well preserved.
The average man is so stubborn that
he would rather break his neck than
bow his head.
Always remember that Opportunity
and Dame Fortune are the only knock
ers who ever made hit.
The reason why you often see six
foot 200-pound female Juggling around
five-foot 115-pound husband is be-
cause every woman ought to have a
man to protect her
Perth Amboy evening news., 1917-01-17
WHERE TO SPEND THE MONEY

Secretary Daniels has sh,wn con-
gress where it can spend the nations
money if 1t is so bent upon relieving
the treasury of the funds Its possess
es and is supposed to possess. The
InnSatary wants s12~sa.ss'ooV Ior HSeTt
yafcr5!ffe declares that the pre-
paredness program adopted by con-
gress the last time it met is in dam
ger because of lack of facilities not
only for the building of ships author
lied, but to keep the ships in repair
after they are built. This sounds
reasonable. 1t Is all well enough TO
authorize the construction of a large
number of war vessels, but if there is
no place to build them, of what use
is the authorization?
Navy yards and Notifications are
what the country needs far more
than post Office buildings in the
hamlets of the south and west. and
deeper channels in the rivulets and
bayous throughout the country. When
there is SO much to do that is really
worth while, we cannot see how men
worthy Of being called congressman.
representing the American people IN
congress, can deliberately plan sucb
raids on the treasury as is now pro-
posed.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1917-01-17
ADMIRAL GEORGE DEWEY

The death Of Admiral Georpe
Dewey at Washington, yesterday. re-
calls one Of the most stirring events
not only IN American history. but in
the naval annals of the world Deu,o,,
was little known to the nation. LET
alone to the outside world, when. ~
commander Of the Asiatic fleet no
headed his column of inferior war
vessels into Manila bay at the out
preak of the Spanish war, regardless
of the danger of mines and witbo,,+
knowing the strength of the Spanish
tefenses. The battle took place at
<lybreak on the first day of Nav
and as the American fleet circlod
again and again, bringing the broad
sides of each vessel to plav on tho
Spanish ships lying under the nro-
lection Of the fort on the shore, the
glory of the American navy was onca
more sounded throughout the world
With the Spanish feet annibiIatad q
W." N 'IdC Iue american ShiDs
not only had escaped unharmed. but
not a single man had been lost u
was a great achievement. No wonder
that Dewey was proclaimed the ma
tional hero.
Deweys welcome in New York y
year later is well remembered. and
with the exception Of a single m
pleasant episode, he has lived in the
greatest esteem of his fellow citizens
ever since. The officials at Washing
ton bear testimony of his unceasinp
interest in the navy and speak of
the valuable service he has rendered
an giving advice and counsel. Con-
gress Justly rewarded him with the
honor of being the first man to carry
the title of Admiral of the Navy" "
Never having been retired he died IN
active service. Admiral Dewey has
won for himself place among
American heroes that will pass down
with the ages No nation has ever
produced greater fighting calibre
tnan John Paul Jones. Perry. Fara-
gut and Dewey.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1917-01-17
Heard and Seen
Here and There

Washington, Jan. 17-Tick! Tick!
Tick! mo Quorum-the doorkeeper
will lock the doors, the sergeant-at-
arms (via the ticker) will notify the
absentees and the clerk will call the
roll" And the "absentees," reclining
in their private offices in the Senate
office building, several blocks from the
Capitol will glance at the tape and
hurry, via their subterranean passage
way, to the Senate chamber to answer
Present"
This will be the future procedure
in the upper house of Congress, and
possibly in the lower, If plans being
formulated today carry. The Senate
chamber Is to be connected up with
the Senate office building, across the
way, with a regular ticker service
as are stock brokerage offices.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1917-01-17
rnE REpuRLICAN PARTY

With the Republicans in New
Jersey taking over control Of the
state for the first time in six years,
it is naturally hard for the members
of that party in this state to realize
Just at this time that the Republican
party has not yet been restored to
its old time prestige, and that there
are still perilous times ahead. 1t is
significant that while New Jersey
Republicans were celebrating the in
auguration of Governor Edge, the
executive committee of the Republi-
can National Committee was deliber-
ately taking steps to undo much of
the work that had been accomplish
ed in uniting the party, and to sow
the seeds of discord.
The trouble with the Republican
party is that the stand-pat leaders
seem to think that the progressive
element that bolted the party in 1912
is now ready for unconditional sur
render. The "Old Guard" realize
that they are in a hopeless minor
ity as far as the rank and file of the
Republican party are concerned, but
they hold the advantage Of having
control of the party organization, and
this they intend to keep, apparently,
as long as they possibly can. BY
various tricks and secret dealings
they are entrenching themselves
against their inevitable overthrow.
The unprecedented action taken by
the executive committee of the ma
tional committee on Monday in elect
ing a vice chairman over the protest
of the national chairman shows to
what extent the reactionaries are
willing to go. They have caused
those Progressives who returned TO
the party fold in order to support
Hughes, to withdraw all active CO.
operation with the Republican Or
ganization, and unless something Is
done to show that the Republican
party is q party of progress and is
going to stand by the people, its ulti-
mate overthrow is bound to occur.
The action taken Monday was to
make certain the continued control
of the party by such men as Hemen-
way, of Indiana; Estabrook, of New
Hampshire; Penrose, of Pennsylva-
mia; Crane, of Massachusetts; Smoot,
of Utah, and Barnes, of New York.
As long as these men are in the sad
die there is little hope for the success
of the Republican party as a nation
al organization.
The action Of the executive COM
mittee of the national committee is
a great disappointment to the well
wishers of the Republican party. 1t
shows that the party is still hopeless
ly split, and in spite of an apparent
victory here and there, as in the case
of New Jersey, the Republican party
is still in very precarious condition.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1917-01-17
NEW JERSEY CENTRAL.

For New York Newark and Eliza.
beth at 6:2s. 7:12. x7:3S. 1855. 1921. 8:24
9.42, 1906. 1888. 1857 a. m; 12:46
2:50 3:14. 443. sos. 6:68. 1924. s9:5:
5:OS. 6:52. s29 D. m.
For Long Branch, Asbury Park
Ocean Grove. Etc.-12:51. $40, 9:12 q
M. 1908. s2.05 4:30, 5:33. 6:37. i0:6'
9:47 D. m.
For Atlantic City-6:10. 9:12 g. nj.
2:17 o. m Sundays-9:37 a. m.
For Philadelphia and Trenton via
1906. ,1:33 a. M: 12:45. 6:06. S:24 p. m,
Sundays-S.32. 9:28 g. m: 1855. sos,
6:52. 1929 p. m.
New York only.
Saturday only
Perth Amboy evening news., 1917-01-17
Nightcaps.

The nightcap is an old fashioned
affair, either crochetted or bottled.
Some men wear them on their heads,
others on their stomachs. You tell
one by it's tassel and the other by its
kick.
The crochetted nightcap isn't so
bad, It's Just crochetted nightcap.
But the bottled nightcap is treach-
erous and movable feast. A nightcap
at night, it becomes an eyeopener in
the morning; an appetizer at noon
and a cocktail at dinner. The Jekyll
and Hyde of nightcaps, as 1t were.
The man who sleeps with one night
cap on his head and another on his
tummie usually takes them both off In
the morning and puts on a crouch.
And he who wears a nightcap on his
head may wear a flower on his coat
but he who wears a nightcap on his
stomach wears a blossom on his nose.
Nightcaps ought to be abolished: All
of them. About the only thing they
ever accomplish anyhow is badness
of the pate or cirrhosis of the liver.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1917-01-17
Glorious HUNGARY.

In speaking of Hungary, German
writer has said: when 1 hear its
name mentioned my waistcoat seems
too tight for me, In my heart wakens
traditionary exploits of long ago, the
poetry and song of the Middle Ages.
Its history is that Of yore, the same
heroism lies within its borders, the
names Of Its heroes alone have
changed"
Perth Amboy evening news., 1917-01-17
NOTICE TO CREDITORS.

Maria Bacha, Administrative of Jo-
seph Bacha, deceased. by direction of
the Surrogate of the County of Middle
sex. hereby gives notice, to the creditors
of the said Joseph Bacha to bring in
their debts. demands and claims against
the estate of the said deceased, under
oath or affirmation, within nine months
from this date. or they will be forever
barred of any action therefor against
the said Administrative.
Dated January 8, 1917.
MARIA BACHA, Administrators
1-109t-oew-Wed
Perth Amboy evening news., 1917-01-17
NOTICE 10 CREDITORS.

Christine Clemensen, executrix of
Soren Clemenson, deceased. by direc-
tion of the Surrogate of the County of
Middlesex. hereby gives notice to the
creditors of the said Soren Clemensen
to bring in their debts, demands and
claims against the estate of the said
deceased, under oath or affirmation,
within nine months from this date. or
they will be forever barred of any
action therefor against the said ex-
ecutriX.
Dated December ~, 1916.
CHRISTINE CLEMENSEN,
437-12-139t-oew-W Executrix
Perth Amboy evening news., 1917-01-17
Have an Ally I'm Chicago Now.

Chicago, Jan. 17-Cupid, and girls
who overlooked their chance last year
have an ardent ally today in Mrs.
Elizabeth Guion Dormer, correspond
ing secretary of the Chicago Social
Club. Her duties are to bring sigh
ing SWANS and blushing maidens, who
otherwise might never meet, together.
Object, matrimony.
The chief aim of the club, however,
Is to establish a middle course be-
tween the expensive clubs and cheap
cabarets. The first meeting of the or
ganization, was attended by 100 doc
tors, lawyers. dentists, students, de-
partment store clerks and stenogra-
piers.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1917-01-17
Singing Contests in Norway.

Some of the songs Of Norway con-
sist of hundreds Of four-line verses,
which must surely be hard test to thSl
,-aNmerv- -cf the singsrss Sometimes
two singers wifi have duet In such
song, singing verse after verse alter
nately. He whose memory, or In de-
fault Of memory, invention, fails him
first is loser.-From Norway, by Nico
JuDgman.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1917-01-17
Help!

This novelist has made a hit,
Though he's not puritan;
He isn't pious, I'll admit,
But he's a writeouS man.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1917-01-17

We know that the prevailing hlgh
prices make the butchers over ANXIOUS
to get rid of their stocks. Yet, some
how or other, female shoppers are not
bit afraid to pass the meat market
of Halter & Grabber in Canton, ONO
Perth Amboy evening news., 1917-01-17

Smith imagines that he looks like
Napoleon" said Brown. "Can you
see any resemblance"
Sure" replied Jones. His head
resembles a Bonaparte."
Perth Amboy evening news., 1917-01-17

Will I. Phiguer, of the Mark Mfg.
Co., GAINESVILLE, Ohio, has found the
answer to the Figure 1t OUT cafe
dinner problem. The proprietor ill
have to buy his seven customers that
dinner in just 420 days.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1917-01-17
PERTH AMBOY 10 NEW YORK

HolidaysN5:s6. sos. s:Ss. a:Ss. .7:27,
7:27 '7:5s 1858. $3.50. $3.50. 1880. 1850
a. m. 1880. 1:50. 2:20. 2:50. $40. 4:28.
5:25. sos. e.46 500. $500. 1000. 11:0O
y. m; 70 90 night
Sundays Only and the following
Legal Holidays-Nov. Z. Nov. 80. Dec.
rs. 1916. Jan ]. Feb. 20. 1917 $40.
1880. $50. $3.50 l0:30. 1850 g. m; 1850.
1850 9:05. 405. 6:O5. sos. 7:15. 8:15.
9:20. 20" ~ M; 1900 night
Express trains.
Saturdays only.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1917-01-17
Dye.

A woman likes to look her best,
She breads the marks that come
from cares;
And you will find-this is no jest
She'll die before she'll have gray
hairs.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1917-01-17

The man who marries certain
GAINESVILLE (Ohio) girl may never nave
a fuss with her. But we are AFRAID
that on n few occasions he will nave
to call her by her maiden name. 1t Is
Esther B. Still
Perth Amboy evening news., 1917-01-17
WIlOa!
Obi

John Curry and Mary Comb have
just been married in Case county, Mo.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1917-01-17

"a man has to have great grand
children before he can be great
grandfather, hasn't hep asked the
Boob.
He has" replied the Student.
but you'll have to admit that Pres
ident Wilson is a great grandfather,
even if he hasn't any great grand
children" insisted the Boob.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1917-01-17
Time!

The ankle watch has passed away,
1t couldn't stand the knockings;
But it is plain. to see that they
Still wear clocks on their stockings
Perth Amboy evening news., 1917-01-17
Max Knows a Few Things.

Willie-Paw, what Is an economist!
Maw-An economist is man VINO
is buying something for his wife, my
son.
Paw-You get to bed, young man.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1917-01-17

In telling trees it is too bad
Their names l can't define;
But when 1 see one looking sad,
i know it is o pir,As- r-iS'fd Mccoy.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1917-01-17

Will Cook, o. Boyle and Well Dunn,
of Lancaster, KY, have agreed to act
as chefs in the club during 1917.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1917-01-17

It Is hard to spend a quiet evening
in some big cities. But when you are
in Cincinnati you can always go to
Helen Reed.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1917-01-17
Tine Table In Effect Oct. 2. 1919
NEW YORK TO Perth ANNOY

Daily. except Sundays and Legal
Holiday $50. $50. 700. 500. SOC.
1000. 11;0o a. M: I2:oo noon. t12:20' 0
sis. $3.50 5:45. 6:16. 6:30. 700. 500.
800. 1000 1880 o. M: 12 night: l:"e
a m
Sundays Only and the following
Legal Holidays: Nov. 7, Nov. 30" EeS
Is. 1916: Jan. /. Feb. %. 1917 = $3.50
-asQas~ e-fVSs.i:O q M: 1900 noon
800 Zoo 500. 1920. 500. $50. 1880
$3.50. $3.50. 1890 p. m; 1900 night; i:0'
Perth Amboy evening news., 1917-01-17
Huh,

1t may interest some of the Corn
Feds to know that Eva Sulter is a lad
les tailor in Huntington, w. Va.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1917-01-17

All, Gwan!
A scholar deep is Henry High,
He's in our college.
He reads dry books to satisfy
His thirst for knowledge.
Luke McLuke.
A temperance guy is William Guy,
rhe most persistent.
He always reads books that are dry
To be consistent.
Newark Advocate.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1917-01-17
BITS OF BY | A Y
by LUKE McLUkE
Copyright 1915. the Cincinnati
Enquirer.


He talks too mucn, does Billy BaZ,
And shows his ignorance;
That's why we VIII ADMIT he mas
An open countenance.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1917-01-17
STATEN ISLAND RAPID TRANSIT
Fare to New York

Round Trip .................... .6o
oV-Irtp TICKET 4S.vU
Monthly Communication ......... 1.oV
Perth Amboy evening news., 1917-01-17

Other towns may claim to have i'm
portant thoroughfares But what we
started to say was that Main Streets
lives in GAINESVILLE, Ohio.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1917-01-17
Names Is Names,

Miss Monroe Clubhouse lives at Ev-
ansville, Ind.
Perth Amboy evening news., 1917-01-17

Things To Worry About.
A tea plant won't live more than Is
years.
The Ward County independent. [volume] (Minot, Ward County, N.D.) 1902-1965, 1917-10-04

seven per cent is allowed before the
war tax attaches to the profits of cor
pOratiOnS, joint stock companies, in
surance companies and partnerships
making profits of seven per cent or
less during the pre-war period; and
an exemption of not more than ten
per cent is to be allowed to corpora
lions, joint stock companies, insurance
companies and partnerships making
profits of seven per cent or more per
annum during the pre-war period. The
report of the House and Senate con-
ferees will be filed in the House and
! Senate this afternoon and will likely
be taken up and voted upon in the
House and Senate on Monday.
The war department will soon an
nounce that a third series of training
| camps for officers of the Reserve
Corps will be held beginning about
January first. 1t is understood that
no civilians will be eligible for these
officers training camps. Only mem
bers of the regular army, the nation
al guard, and the new national army
will be entitled to qualify for appoint
ment to these training camps.
Newspaper items, purporting to
have been made last Friday by Rep
resentative Hefiin of Alabama, and
Representative Howard of Georgia,
referring to the sO-called "Slush Fund
of $50,00O requested in a telegram to
his government by Count Won Bern.
storff, Ambassador from Germany, ere.
ated a considerable amount of bitter
debate in the House this week. In the
newspaper reports that were heralded
to all parts of the country last Satur.
day, Representative Hefin is quoted
as having said:
81 have heard story that there
is a gambling room in Washington
where pro-German and peace-at-
any-price members of Congress
get their pay by being extraordi-
narily lucky at cards.
know | could name thirteen or
fourteen members Of the House
and Senate who have acted in a
very suspicious fashion"
And Representative Howard was
reported as having said:
This money was not all for tel
egrams. Some was used directly
and think | can pick out the men
who got it. They look whole LOT
more prosperous than they ever
did before"
On the introduction of resolutions
calling upon Representative Hetlir
and Representative Howard to sub
stantiate the truth Of their statements
they abjectly denied that they haC
made the statements that were pub
lished in the newspapers, and declared
that they had no reason whatever tt
believe and did not believe that any
member of the House had received
any of the Bernstorff "slush fund.- di
rectly or indirectly. Notwithstanding
these denials on the part of Hef1ir
and Howard, the newspaper reporter.