davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Tucumcari news and Tucumcari times. [volume] (Tucumcari, N.M.) 1907-1921, 1917-04-05

with an ole hat like they WIZ about
{ swing int eternity. did you ever
see Il tinid Teller hnngin' around Il
show window nearly hreukin' his neck
tryin' I read II pric" tab that wuz
turned III wrong way? He's afraid e
90 in. II seems like tn better YOU
know "A clerk m more anxious he Is
t sell You II Cat with II cup In IN
back. tn worse II sui; a clothes fits
you tn longer IL lasts.
Tn task - pickin' ont n new suit a.
clothes or n new hat. coupled with IN
ordeal a. pnrtin' with your money, is
bad enough, but your close communion
with II triple mirror duriu' m %trnnSnc-
ton destroys what little interest in
Iii" you may hay" saved out a. tn
wreck. How good a fcllcr feels when
The Tucumcari news and Tucumcari times. [volume] (Tucumcari, N.M.) 1907-1921, 1917-04-05

Come In amy time, I'll be glad e.
So" YOU"
Il wuz under tn impression that I'd
paid that"
We've never been up n night with
him"
"Surc, wen send 1t out t'day."
I'll have II nan out there t'mor-
row"
II tried I find you all day"
"lll make 1t t you fer jest what 1t
cost"
wv" could have sold II Il dozen
times Yesterday"
"Whut II bccomin' dress ="
"lll hand 1t { YOU Saturday"
I'm fond - grand opery.'
"lll hay L ask my wife"
Flu when IL comes { yeracity tn ole
time boss trader hnint In IL with tn
Teller who's been L Louisville an back
Ia Il second hand car.
The Tucumcari news and Tucumcari times. [volume] (Tucumcari, N.M.) 1907-1921, 1917-04-05

your" lookin' fer IN amy store In town {:
IN understood clerk with III bow legs
who tells you what they're wcarin'
down East III busy clerk who slips
u %ruincont on YOU an don't rome back
Ter an hour IN persistent clerk who
stands In front a. YOU when you prom.
is = rom" in agin an start fer tn
door. an tn real SS-notr regular clerk
who Is willin' I tear down everything
In III store { please you.
Some clerks are so pleasant they
scare YOU. Your whole disposition L
buy ynnishes tn moment they take
YOU by IN arm. Then theirs other
clerks YOU hate L bother. II n Teller
knows Jest what he wants when he
goes In n store h''s II crank. II he
don't know what he wants he's II dub.
TIL hnrdcst thing II { make n clerk
uH ierstnnd what you want If he hasn't
got Il. II n Teller Is undecided ms e..
what he wants he allus buys somcthin'
he don't want.
Tn Teller who goes int n store
Jest L look around IL nearly allas n
coward. lie wants 4 buy hut he's
afraid. He has carried home so much
Junk In tn past thar he can't trust
himself. II he wants II new round
crowned brown derby Jest like tn one
he's got GA. tn clerk II fish out II green
Fodory with II how In IN back nn' give
Inn III hypnotic eye an he buys II.
'l"p h" gets home hc gives It L his
lies l.;tic iru,hcr. Some fellcrs part
The Tucumcari news and Tucumcari times. [volume] (Tucumcari, N.M.) 1907-1921, 1917-04-05
handkerchief as Newspaper.

IN contrast I" the poetic and roman
tie side of It's character ARE the odd
uses 1" which the handkerchief has
been pnt and "f the part 1t has played
in history. For in $40 the British
government, in the absence of n penny
newspaper, did not dls,lain to resort
to this humble means of casting broad.
east the address delivered by Queen
Anne on the opening o! parliament,
and this strange practice, more or less
in vogue throughout her reign. com.
memoratcd the Victories ~ Mnrlbor.
ough over the French aud OF the treaty
~ Utrecht.
The Tucumcari news and Tucumcari times. [volume] (Tucumcari, N.M.) 1907-1921, 1917-04-05
LAXATIVE
FOR SICK CHILD
California Syrup of Figs" can't
harm tender stomach,
liver and bowels.

Every mother realizes. after giving
her children California Syrup OF
Figs" that this is their ideal laxative.
because they love its pleasant taste
and II thoroughly ~cleanses the tender
little stomach, liver and bowels with
out gripping.
When cross, irritable. feverish, or
breath is bad, stomach sour, look nc
the tongue, mother. II coated, give a
teaspoonful OF this harmless fruit
laxative" and in a few hours all the
foul. coastipated waste, sou bile and
~undigested food passes out of the bow
els. and o have a well, playful child
again. When its little system is FUN
OF cold, throat sore, has stomach-ache,
diarrhoea, indigestion. colic-rcmem-
Der. a good inside cleaning" should
always be the first treatment given.
Millions of mothers keep California
Syrup of Figs" handy; they know a
teaspoonful today saves a sick child
tomorrow. Ask at the store for a 30
cent bottle of california Syrup OF
Figs which has directions for babies,
children of all ages and grown-ups
printed on the bottle. Adv.
The Tucumcari news and Tucumcari times. [volume] (Tucumcari, N.M.) 1907-1921, 1917-04-05
CALOMEL S|CKENS! It SALWATES!
DON'T STAY BILIOUS, C0NST|PATED
Guarantee "Dodson's Liver Tone viii Give You the Best Liver
and Bowel Cleansing You Ever Had-Dont Lose a Days Work!

Calomel makes you sick: you lose a
days work. Calomel Is quicksilver
and 1t salivates: calomel Injuries your
liver.
II you are bilious, feel lazy, sluggish
and all knocked out, IL your bowels
ara constipated and your head aches
or stomach Is sour. just take a spoon.
full of harmless Dodson's Liver Tone
instead OF using sickening. salivating
calomel. Dodson's Liver Tone Ia real
liver medicine. Youll know It next
morning because you will wake up
feeling fine, your liver will be work.
Ing, your headache and dizziness gone
your stomach will be sweet and your
bowels regular. You will feel like
working. You'll be cheerful; full OF
vigor and ambition.
Your druggist or dealer sells you a
b0.cent bottle OF Dodson's Liver Tone
The Tucumcari news and Tucumcari times. [volume] (Tucumcari, N.M.) 1907-1921, 1917-04-05

under my personal guarantee that II
will clean your sluggish liver better
than nasty calomel; 1t won't make you
sick and you can eat anything you
want without being salivated. Your
druggist guarantees that each spoonful
will start your liver, clean your bowels
and straighten you up by morning or
you can have your money back. Chill.
dren gladly take Dodson's Liver Tone
because it is pleasant tasting and
doesn't grippe or cramp or make them
sick.
am selling millions OF bottles OF bod.
sons Liver Tone to people who have
found that this pleasant, vegetable. liv.
err medicine takes the place OF danger.
calomel. Buy one bottle on my
sound, reliable guarantee. Ask your
druggist Or storekeeper about me. Adv.
The Tucumcari news and Tucumcari times. [volume] (Tucumcari, N.M.) 1907-1921, 1917-04-05
The Sign Of Indian Prosperity.

The ownership Of II motorcar may
not always he II SAT" index of material
prosperity. but in the ease of John
Lightfoot of Arizona, ownership of n
car may NJ least be taken rs II proof
that III" blanket Indian can succeed
at dry farming. Mr.. Lightfoot is said
to possess such II machine, but it is
safe To predict that he will not long
be- til" only red man To enjoy this
privilege.
The Tucumcari news and Tucumcari times. [volume] (Tucumcari, N.M.) 1907-1921, 1917-04-05
CLEAR YOUR COMPLEXION
While You Sleep With cutieura Soap
and Ointment-Trial Free.

On retiring, gently smear the face
with Cuticura Ointment. wash of in
five minutes with Cuticura Soap and
hot water, and continue bathing Il few
minutes with the Soap. The influence
Of this treatment on the pores extends
through the night.
Free sample each by mail with Book.
Address postcard, cuticura, Dept. l.,
Boston. Sold cverywhere.-Adv.
The Tucumcari news and Tucumcari times. [volume] (Tucumcari, N.M.) 1907-1921, 1917-04-05
Diagnosis by Patient.

The physicians were consulting be-
side the bed of Il man supposed 10
have appendicitis.
"No," said one of them decislvcly,
IL think we should walt until he gets
stronger before operating"
The other doctor opened his mouth
to speak, but the patient beat him TO
II.
"What do you take me for?" he
asked feebly. "a checseI'
The Tucumcari news and Tucumcari times. [volume] (Tucumcari, N.M.) 1907-1921, 1917-04-05
In the Wronu Place.

An Old gcntIrmun WnIkcd up 70 The
pretty girl attendant NJ the counting
room OF II daily newspaper office II few
lays ago and said
Miss, ! would like 10 get copies of
your paper for Il week back
you had better get n porous plas-
ter" She nhstructly replied. you get
them just across the street"
The Tucumcari news and Tucumcari times. [volume] (Tucumcari, N.M.) 1907-1921, 1917-04-05
Oklahoma City

Favorite Prescription to anybody for Il
has done me worlds Of good and ] am
sure II will help others ms WE'LL
MRS. NJ. j.. SMITH, Box Is, Route 4.
Any medicine dealer can supply II in
ether liquid or tablet form. The cost
IL modest. the restorative benefits
truly remarkable. Write Or. Pierce.
lnvallds' Hotel, Buffalo. n. Y, for free
book on woman's diseases. You can
also have medical advice without cost.
The Tucumcari news and Tucumcari times. [volume] (Tucumcari, N.M.) 1907-1921, 1917-04-05
Sounds

Someone has estimated that there
are 3O,O0O,uD cats In this country.
lnasmuch as n few cats may sound
like millions at certain uncanny hours
AT night, we demand II count.-Pitts,
burgh Post.
The Tucumcari news and Tucumcari times. [volume] (Tucumcari, N.M.) 1907-1921, 1917-04-05
STOP THAT HACKING COUGH.

Mansfield formerly Hungarian)
Cough Balsam heals the inflamed and
lacerated membranes and quiets the
tickling nerves that lie underneath the
Infected portions. Invaluable for ba.
bies. Price PC and 5Oc.-Adv.
The Tucumcari news and Tucumcari times. [volume] (Tucumcari, N.M.) 1907-1921, 1917-04-05
PERUNA
LOOP the Loop With a Load.

Lieutenant Nugorski of the Russian
army HyiuIion corps has luop"d the
COP with II passenger ana LOO
pounds of extra weight.
The Tucumcari news and Tucumcari times. [volume] (Tucumcari, N.M.) 1907-1921, 1917-04-05

h" gitS out a II sore whore he nearly
bought Snrncthin'!
hut III worst - all IN clerks Is tn
on" who shows you what he wears.
Copyright. Adams Newspaper Service
The Tucumcari news and Tucumcari times. [volume] (Tucumcari, N.M.) 1907-1921, 1917-04-05
Good for the Nerves.

To obviate the noise Of pneumatic
riveting machines, one has been In
vented that squeeZcs rivets into place
with "A pressure of n ton.
The Tucumcari news and Tucumcari times. [volume] (Tucumcari, N.M.) 1907-1921, 1917-04-05
Russian Salt Output.

luSSia'S annual production of salt,
NhlCh II government monopoly controls,
'NcccdS 100000 tons.
The Tucumcari news and Tucumcari times. [volume] (Tucumcari, N.M.) 1907-1921, 1917-04-05
ADVICE TO WOMEN

okIn.-I SuWerc0
from a woInan's
weakness and gen.
eral debility until
] took DIR. Pierce's
Favorite ~l'rescrip-
ton and II has
done me o good
than any other
medicine ever
used. ] do not
hesitate to eco
mnud Dr pinrpa'a
The Tucumcari news and Tucumcari times. [volume] (Tucumcari, N.M.) 1907-1921, 1917-04-05
Red Cross Docs in War.

There are more than 900 Red
work for the wounded.
The Tucumcari news and Tucumcari times. [volume] (Tucumcari, N.M.) 1907-1921, 1917-04-05
Where He Rules

Are you the head Of the housef"
II wouldn't say that exactly. but |
do the driving when the mlssus and
| go out In the auto"
The Tucumcari news and Tucumcari times. [volume] (Tucumcari, N.M.) 1907-1921, 1917-04-05

Beautiful. GEAR white clothes delights
The laundrcs~ who uses Red Cross Ball
Blue. All grocers. ADV.
The Tucumcari news and Tucumcari times. [volume] (Tucumcari, N.M.) 1907-1921, 1917-04-05
Covers fer o. nts.

been invented for protecting
plants from cold.
The Tucumcari news and Tucumcari times. [volume] (Tucumcari, N.M.) 1907-1921, 1917-04-05

The United States yearly spends
S1OO,00O,0OO In building public schools
The Tucumcari news and Tucumcari times. [volume] (Tucumcari, N.M.) 1907-1921, 1917-04-05
womAN's GROWING GLORY

Is her hair. If yours Is streuked with
ugly, grizzly, gray hairs, use LA Gre
ole" Hair Dressing and change 1t In
the natural way. Price S1.O0.-Adv.
The Tucumcari news and Tucumcari times. [volume] (Tucumcari, N.M.) 1907-1921, 1917-04-05

Giovanni lihretto, dead In New York,
Ordcred SlW.NON spent on his fnncrni.
The Tucumcari news and Tucumcari times. [volume] (Tucumcari, N.M.) 1907-1921, 1917-04-05
Keep 1t
Handy

Ward off attacks Of grip,
colds and indigestion by timely
medication with the thoroughly test.
cd and reliable remedy OF the Amer.
can household
PERUNA
It's better to be safe than sorry.
Many o long spell Of distressing sickness
might have been prevented II this proved
remedy had been rcsorted 70 In the FIRST
ssnees. Any article that has been efficiently
used for nearly half n century has proved
its value. Tablet form II you desire II.
Al your draasists.
] TIfr pEnURk co. Csississ, Oh
The Tucumcari news and Tucumcari times. [volume] (Tucumcari, N.M.) 1907-1921, 1917-04-05
Horse SALE

Pure glyccrin will help to dissolve
fruit tains from linen.
Wall paper that Is made from rubber
hns been invented By IN Englishman.
The Tucumcari news and Tucumcari times. [volume] (Tucumcari, N.M.) 1907-1921, 1917-04-05

Kisses that ARE not intoxicating are
fhe kind that drive Il man to drink.
The Tucumcari news and Tucumcari times. [volume] (Tucumcari, N.M.) 1907-1921, 1917-04-05

Love Is never satisfied until It gets
both arms full.
The Tucumcari news and Tucumcari times. [volume] (Tucumcari, N.M.) 1907-1921, 1917-04-05

Send tn cent? to Dr. Knmer & Co, Binghamton, n. Y, for sample size bottle.
1t will convince anyone. You will ao receive a booklet Of valuable information.
telling about the kidneys and bladder. When writing. be sure and mentions this paper.
Regular City cent and n edolar sneb bottles for sale at all drug stores.
The Tucumcari news and Tucumcari times. [volume] (Tucumcari, N.M.) 1907-1921, 1917-04-05
Oklahoma Druggists Advice
to Kidney Sufferers

have been selling DR.. Kilmcr'. Swamp.
Root for fifteen years and during that tlmo
have heard nothing but praises from my
customers for the benefits received from
its use. Without exception, it Is the most
popular kidney remedy on the market and
one Of the best.
Very truly yours,
CItAS. \. FRASER.
Ex.Member Okla. Board Pharmacy.
Dec. 5, 1915. Red Rock, Okla.
The Ocala evening star. [volume] (Ocala, Fla.) 1895-1943, 1917-08-01
A PICNIC AND BALL
FOR COMPANY A

A number of the friends of the
members of Company A want to give
the boys basket picnic and ball at
Silver Springs Friday night.
They suggest that all who can do
so help with their cars to take the
boys out to the springs late in the
afternoon, and also provide generous
baskets of eatables. After a picnic
supper, they can dance in the pavil-
ion until coming home time.
1t is an excellent idea and the Star
hopes it will be carried out. Begin
ming next Sunday morning, the MEM
bers of Company A are in for months,
probably years, of hard work and
deadly danger, and it will be most
appropriate thing to give them the
most pleasant evening possible before
they go away.
Anyone who wants to help on this
excellent proposition, with auto,
lunch basket or both, please commu-
nicate as soon as possible with Rev,
G. A. Gilman or Messrs. w. 7. Gary
or c. w. Hunter.
The Ocala evening star. [volume] (Ocala, Fla.) 1895-1943, 1917-08-01

On orders from Washington, the
postmistress at Kissimmee released
the Valley-Gazette and it was allow
ed to go to it's subscribers four days
late. It's the Stars opinion that Mrs.
Simpson was right, and while it was
proper for the Valley-Gazette to be
released in this one instance (for it
is loyal paper), it should be made
a rule that all publications carrying
such advertisements, or advising re-
sistance to the CONSUMPTION act, should
be excluded from the mails. This is
no time for even the loyal to bubble,
and the disloyal deserve no considera-
ton. The people who are fighting the
selective draft are influenced not so
much by principle as by cowardice
and selfshness. They want the war
to be fought by other men and other
mems sons, so they can stay at home
and save their skins and their feel
ings and be in position at the end OF
the war to get ahead of the, men who
made sacrifices for the sake of the
country.
The Ocala evening star. [volume] (Ocala, Fla.) 1895-1943, 1917-08-01

Our idea of wasting a lot of valu-
able time and newspaper space is the
agitation about whether or not a
Cats may be captain.-Tampa
Tribune.
Yes; but if it was a company in
your home town and your friends
were wronged, you would raise the
devil. 1t is not so much a question OF
whether a Cats should be made cap
tain or not The law has been broken
and favoritism has been shown in the
place of all places where it should not
be, and the question is whether this
wrong shall stand or not. The boys
were given a dirty deal, to appoint a
captain over them without their
knowledge and then try to. put them
in position where they couldn't help
themselves.
The Ocala evening star. [volume] (Ocala, Fla.) 1895-1943, 1917-08-01

o In letter to the Florida Fedora
ton of Woman's Clubs Governor Cats
answers the criticism of the appoint
ment of Joe Earman as chairman of
the board of control, in charge of the
states higher institutions of learning,
by declaring that eff Jesus could as
sociate with a woman by name of
of Mary Magdalene out of whom he
cast seven devils, I do not see why
you and | can not associate with a
man like Mr.. Earman and lift him to
higher things."-St. Petersburg
Times.
This was the greatest contribution
made to current humor during the
month of July.
The Ocala evening star. [volume] (Ocala, Fla.) 1895-1943, 1917-08-01

Editor Benjamin wants to borrow
our society editor. We might con-
slider temporary exchange, if he
could offer US one as good-and good
looking. But we at this writing know
Of only one paper in the state which
could qualify for such swap.-Tam-
pa Tribune.
We might swap with you if you will
give us enough to boot. Our society
editor isn't much bigger than the
Kohinoor, but she is fully as valuable
and we doubt that you have the coin
to balance the exchange.
The Ocala evening star. [volume] (Ocala, Fla.) 1895-1943, 1917-08-01
TEMPERANCE NOTES
TO PLACE ALCOHOL WITH OTHER
POISONS
CBy the National Woman's Chris
tan Temperance Union.)

Prohibition legislation simply pro-
poses to place the traffic in intOxicat-
ing liquors on precisely the same basis
as the traffic in deleterious drugs,
poisons, decayed meat, spoiled vege-
tables, explosives and so forth.
We do not license men to sell de-
cayed meat for eating purposes; why
should we license men to peddle poi
soned beverages for drinking pur-
poses?
Decayed meat has its commercial
uses and so has alcohol. The eating
of diseased meat is not prohibited and
it is not proposed to forbid the drink
ing of poisoned beverages. Both eat
lag bad meat and drinking of alcoholic
slop is left for the individual to de-
eide.
But wherein is the state duty bound
to provide facilities for one to dope
himself, any more than to provide ia
cilities for a pervert to eat rancid
beef ?-American Issue.
The Ocala evening star. [volume] (Ocala, Fla.) 1895-1943, 1917-08-01

Frank Clark's reputed intention to
run for governor is causing a great
deal of speculation-principally as to
why he wants to quit Washington for
Tallahassee. 1t also recalls the fact
that another Florida congressman
once tried to make the same move
Tampa Tribune.
Whenever Frank Clark serves his
time in the House, Florida will find il
to her interest to promote him to the
Senate.
The Ocala evening star. [volume] (Ocala, Fla.) 1895-1943, 1917-08-01
SERMON FOR THE SOLDIERS

The pastors of the city desire to
give the members of Company A a
farewell service Sunday. If it is
given, it will probably be in the Tenn
pie theater or the Methodist church
Sunday evening. Beside the addresses
of the pastors, there will be the best
of music, and all the town should at
tend
The Ocala evening star. [volume] (Ocala, Fla.) 1895-1943, 1917-08-01

Cats says he had nothing to do
with foisting Sidney Jr. on the mil
tia company at Tallahassee-that he
protested against the appointment.
We imagine the protests of His Rev
erence were about as strong as a
hook-worm- infected summer zephyr.
Tampa Times.
Anybody who believes Cats in this
instance will believe-will believe
some of the other things he says.
The Ocala evening star. [volume] (Ocala, Fla.) 1895-1943, 1917-08-01

Says the Orlando Reporter Star:
Congressman Frank Clark comes to
the rescue of the Tallahassee boys in
their rights to elect the captain of
their own military company. Clark
and the Tallahassee boys will win out
if they stick to it, and Sidey J. Jr. will
be forced to resign. This idea of al
lowing the Cats family to ride rough
shod- over the whole state is getting
to be wee-bit repulsive to even
some of the Cats apologists."
The Ocala evening star. [volume] (Ocala, Fla.) 1895-1943, 1917-08-01

The Kissimmee Valley Gazette
says: "a cable reached here Thurs
day stating that Lieut.. Frank Vans
Agnew has received the military cross
for conduct in battle at Messines
Ridge. Lieut.. Vans Agnew is we'll
known here, and his former friends
and business associates will be graft
fed to learn of this honor which has
been conferred upon him."
The Ocala evening star. [volume] (Ocala, Fla.) 1895-1943, 1917-08-01

According to dispatch from
Jacksonville to a Miami paper, Joe
Earman not only voted for himself as
chairman of the state board of con-
troll and the state plant board, but
gave out the statement that he was
elected by unanimous vote. If he did
so, he told most disgraceful I'M
truth, as two members of the boards,
Messrs. Wartmann and King, did not
vote for him.
The Ocala evening star. [volume] (Ocala, Fla.) 1895-1943, 1917-08-01

The commanding officer of the local
company of artillery declined promo
ton until certain his men would get
the commander they desired. This
shows the right spirit and indicates
that the captain will look out for his
men first as first rate commander
always will do.-St. Petersburg In
dependent.
He is somewhat different from
Capt. Cats of Company B, First in
fantry.
The Ocala evening star. [volume] (Ocala, Fla.) 1895-1943, 1917-08-01
oCALA'S CONTRIBUTION

The contribution of the Ocala lodge
of Elks to the million dollar fund be-
ing raised by the order for the benefit
of American soldiers and sailors is
173. And that is very good for the
number of members of the lodge now
in town,
The Ocala evening star. [volume] (Ocala, Fla.) 1895-1943, 1917-08-01

Mems clothes, it is said, will be
made without pockets next season.
There1l be no need for pockets if
these Red Cross girls continue to
make their calls, so isch ka bibble.-
Tampa Times.
How would you carry your pocket
knife and matches.
The Ocala evening star. [volume] (Ocala, Fla.) 1895-1943, 1917-08-01
A POINT FOR PERSONAL LIBERTY
ADVOCATES TO CONSIDER.

A Roman Catholic priest in an Ohio
city, taking part with the pastors OF
the other churches in Sunday night
meeting of protest against the lawless-
ness of the traffic, said: 81 am
ashamed of any Catholic in this town
who is not able to provide for his own
family without blighting the families
Of other men,"
The Ocala evening star. [volume] (Ocala, Fla.) 1895-1943, 1917-08-01

The government recently command
eered as stolen property the original
journal of the oath Congress with the
long-hand account of the proceedings
Of the House during the administra-
ton of Andrew Jackson, which junk
man attempted to sell.
The Ocala evening star. [volume] (Ocala, Fla.) 1895-1943, 1917-08-01

a Kentucky college forty years ago
for shooting at man and missing
him. Probably that is why Clark,
who was born in Kentucky, moved to
Missouri. Such a bad marksman
could never hope to win political
preference in Kentucky.