Honolulu star-bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1912-2010, 1917-09-10

, careful of the furniture.
Nevertheless, this unhappy Nife's
grievance is a real grievance and 1t
is true that she is letting it wreck
her life. The pebble in the shoe can
spoil the finest outing and the grain
OF sand in the eye keeps us from see
ing the most beauteous landscape.
OF course the chief fault in this
particular case where marriage is
proving a failure is the womans. She
is making a mountain out Of mole
hill Providence having vouChsafed
her real trouble, she has gone TO
work, woman-like, and manufactured
a whole bunch of suffering and mar
trydom out Of nothing. II she had an
ounce Of common sense or philosophy
she would follow old Omars advice
and take the sweet and let the bitter
co." and pick up after her husband
and wash out the spots on the table
cloth and thank God that she hasn't
anything worse to do.
The husband, however, is to blame
this far, that he laughs at his wifes
point of view instead of trying to get
it. A happy marriage necessitates
many adjustments and none is more
important than for husband and wife
to see the little things of daily life
from the same angle and get the same
perspective on them. 1t doesn't do for
one to regard them as trifles and the
other as matters of life and death.
This is particularly true in the mat.
ter of personal neatness. Women are
always being advised as to the neces-
sity of keeping themselves looking at
tractive to their husbands, and are
warned that frowsy wrappers and curl |
papers and sloppiness and slovenliness |
will disillusion and disgust any hus- |
band on earth.
Nobody ever says word to men |
about keeping themselves barbered |
and shaved, and with spotless linens
and well pressed clothes in order to
retain their wives affection. Yet
women care a thousandfold more for
looks and good clothes than men do,
and nothing is more calculated to
wreck loves young dream than
three days stubble Of beard on a
masculine chin, hair that struggles
over a soiled collar, and suit that
looks as If 1t has been slept in and
that suggests that the owner ought to
wear bib when he eats.
How a dainty, refined woman who
always looks as IL she had just come
out Of bandbox can keep in love
with q husband who looks as If he
needed to be run through steam
laundry and the grass mower, is one
Of the mysteries Of the feminine heart
that we shall never understand. Per
haps she doesn't. Anyway, the theory
that a wife's affection is proof against
her husbands sloyenliness is one that
men win do well lot to put too much
faith in. Other wives may secretly,
be disenchanted as this complaining
wife is. e. "#...
Also it is undoubtedly discouraging I
to a woman who is trying to keep a
neat house to have a husband who
passes through i: like a cyclone. leav-
ing destruction in his wake, and who
doubles and trebles her work oysneYer
putting anything back where he got it.
This is rank unadulterated selfishness
Tor which there is no excuse. II
To the woman who is letting her
good, kind, generous husbands little
'aults blind her to all his big virtues. /
so that it is turning what should be
! happy marriage into a miserable
one, / can offer sovereign remedy I
hat never fails. Let her go away
rom him, go away among strangers
or a while. Separation is the cure
Tor nine-tenths of domestic misery.
ind it's pity that people haven't. en-
,ugh intelligence to realize this and
Lpply it themselves without calling in
he diyotce court doctor
Two people, especially when they =
ire Of entirely different tempera, :
nents, are practically sure to get on ,
ZACH others nerves when they live to- 8
,ether day in and day out. They see
zach other at such close range that I