The Wahpeton times. [volume] (Wahpeton, Richland County, Dakota [N.D.]) 1879-1919, 1917-04-05
His Medicine


cyclopedias he was missed from the
corner drug store for three nights, but
on the fourth night he showed up
bought his accustomed cigar and took
his usual seat on one of the round
stools ut the end Of the soda fountain.
It was noted that he was unusually
silent and solemn and did not join al
first in the discussion of the ordinary
topics that were preached by the other
members of the "club" touching upon
current events, but when the subject Of
the war came up and some mention
was made of the asphyxiating gas and
the curtains Of fire, jerks frightened
up and threw in the remark, rather cas-.
ually:
"There's nothing new about the use
Of liquid fire in the war. Greek fire
was in use by the Greeks of Constan.
tinople throughout the middle ages.
The Assyrian bas-reliefs also show that
it was used long before the Christian
era. 1t was said to be composed of
quick sulphur, dregs Of wine. Persian
gum, baked salt, pitch, petroleum and
other known combustibles-"
The 'bunch" eyed jerks curiously,
but refrained from comment. He had
evidently opened up jackpot and
found them with nothing to draw to.
Somebody switched the talk to brands
Of cigars and then to pipe smoking.
"Give me good old briar pipe." said
Jones.
"But you can't get them any more"
put in jerks. 'There isn't one genu-
inc briar root pipe In ten thousand
nowadays. The pipe generally known
as the briar root pipe is really made
frorl the roots of the tree heath-the
Erica arborea is the technical name
for 1t. 1t is obtained on the hills of
the Maremma and they ship it to Leg
horn to be manufactured, and I want
to tell you boys that it is some proc
ess even to prepare those roots for
the pipe cutters. They soak them in
vat for twelve hours-tf}at's what
gives them that yellowish brown color
that we all appreciate so much In
good briar pipe"
sounds like pipe to rle," muttered
the doctor who officed upstairs, but the
rest of the crowd lapsed into silence
for few moments and then began to
talk about the new city charter. jerks
continued every night to spring new
morsels of abstruse information on
them, until finally, one night, after he
had gone home. they met in executive
session and took up jerks case.
"Where in the world is that guy dig
ging up that high-browed stuff any
way?" growled Smith.
"Don't you know?' said the drug
clerk, "he's just got set of encyclo-
pedias. some down and the bal
ance later on, and he dopes up on it
every night"
'Oh, that's it. is it?" said the doctor.
"Wcll, that reminds me. I've got an
old book upstairs that was looking
over the other night. It is called Facts,
Fables and Fancies.' compilation Of
things not usually to be found in the
encyclopedias. Let's give jerks dose
of his own medicine"
So, for couple of nights longer they
continued to listen to jerks learned
discourses, while they passed the book
around and loaded for him. Then one
night, when they had got to talking
politics and somebody said something
about Tammany Hall. the doctor, fixing
his eye carelessly upon jerks, inter.
jected the remark:
'"The Tammany tiger never changes
its spots. 1t is up to the same tricks
now that it was in the days of the Lo.
cofocos."
"Yes," said Jones. the Locofocos
were the first fellows that let in the
light on that Tammany bunch. But
New York was always bear pit for
politics. You remember the Goodies
in Dewitt Clinton's time-they came
neal splitting up the old Federalist
party"
Goodies? Locofoeos? Where do
you get that kind of talk?" asked
jerks, little uneasy, apparently, aft
er the words had been banded back
and forth.
'What? Never heard Of the Good
les? Or the Locofocos? Surprised ut
you, Jenks-a man of your reading.
The Goodies was the name Of po-
litical sect that originated in New
York about the year 1914. They got
their name from a series of well-writ-
ten articles attacking Dewitt Clinton
and also the pacifists of the Federalist
party. signed 'Abimelech Coody'-the
articles were really written by Gulian
G. Verplanck. Dewitt Clinton called
the Goodies, hybrid sect, composed
| OF the SHAWN Of Federalism and In.