The Liberal democrat. [volume] (Liberal, Kan.) 1911-1924, 1917-08-09


a Doctors phone to phone for anoth-
er physician, which reminds US of
Manhattan woman who went into
one grocery store and used the phone
to place her order for groceries with
another store. Sometimes, in spite
of the sadness in the world, we have
to laugh.
Wichita Beacon: "War is Gods
laundry" says a Chicago mother.
Yet, after three long years of wash
ing, God has not yet touched the
Kaiser and his bunch.
In the Topeka Capital, Gel. J. E.
House recalling the time when J. f.
Todd snook up behind him and hit
him with loaded cane, rises gently
to the serene and philopsophic mood
that comes when one views the days
that were. From that vantage point
chased its editor with horsewhip
! The suggestion is not a bad-one. We
should follow it but for a plan we
have been maturing for years, to
print our recollections of the peril
Gus time of the Kansas press.
These pallid days upon which we
have fallen do not recall the blithe
I gay years when reporting was COM
beined with foot racing, mayhem
ground and lofty climbing, buck and
wing dancing and assault with in
tent to kill. Thirty-two years ago
this summer we began to kick the
heavy Cole jobber, rustic personals
at the trains and drop watermelon
rinds on prominent citizens passing
below as we nodded public opinion
in the forms, hot and often rebelli-
Gus, for the columns of the Butler
County Democrat.
Our first essay at reform was up
on a gambler who had little stud
game four doors down the hallway
from the office, and who used to like
to take out girl we fancied in red
wheeled buggy. That red buggy gave
US realizing sense of the wicked
ness of the gamblers life.
So, while the editor was out of
town, we slipped an item in the pa
per about the stud game which the
city marshal could not well over
look. The item was a mistake. That
gambler sat up out of hours four
long days trying to get chance to
kick our base of supplies into our
subconsciousness, and only a fleet
and earnest pair of young feet kept
the gambler from achieving his end.
incidentally, he got the girl. Which
taught us lesson about the graft
tude of republics.
The year following while riding
the hook and ladder trucks to fires
and drawing SO per week as a runa-
way reporter and train chaser for
Bent Murdoch on the Ell Dorado Re-
publican, we were persuaded by a
local advertiser to make a few SEN
sible remarks about lady peddlne
corsets in the town who was taking
business from the merchant prince.
The lady went to the harness shop.
bought keen rawhide and walked
Main Street and Sixth Avenue for
two days and haunted the Ell Dorado
Republican office at all hours for the
reporter The boss and the foreman
expressed virtuous indignation to her
at the shameless attitude of the re-
porter and he made his beat from the
| alleys, merely peering into a store
from the back room to see if she was
there, before entering it, and never
getting far from the alley door. We
wrote our copy on the back stairs
and sent in by the devil, who once
being eager for foot race or Some
thing Equally Good, told the waiting
and obdurate young woman where
we were perched.
Then that episode passed, and we
roasted circus that didn't advertise
enough to suit our nice taste in those
matters, and if the circus had sent a
sober man to do its fighting he might
have caught us. In those Eldorado
years we attempted to paralyze the
Farmers Alliance, and were ridden
in effigy through the streets of
town; boycott was declared on the
| paper, and the candidate for county
attorney on the alliance ticket bought
IA gun to answer our charges.
Then we moved to Lawrence,
where we have winged many gay
mile down Massachusetts street be-
fore irate citizens, have faced many
a furious mob of Democrats in the
'office, coming in to stop subscrip-
lions and order out advertising.
Once Jerry Gladheart-peace to his
'ashes-sent word that he would
shoot us on sight, and once Pete
! Foley came to call with large,
feverish ball bat, and remained to
pray. Life at Lawrence was just
one long, gorgeous filtration with
violent death.
In Kansas City, life grew gradual
| ly dull and monotonous. So we left
for Emporia, where for few years
business did pick up. We were slug
ged by prominent citizen, chased
by lady, laid for by. female joint
list with pistol, and hanged in effigy
in Populist parade. A negro muir
derer once tried to fuss his way into
fame through our remains, which
would not remain, and local states
man once removed big gun from an
indignant reader who desired our
blood.
The committee has told us we had
to leave town; bankers have warned
anrat,ot onr most duo mana ap1