The Washington herald., 1917-03-13
Stranger, Why Should | Not
Speak to You?
BY ORIsON SWEET MARDEN,

and desire to speak to me, why
should you not speak to me? And
why should not speak to you?" says
Walt Whitman.
What a great pity it is that the
usages of society, especially in large
centers, forbids our recognizing
strangers in the street, wherever we
meet theml
This is one reason why a great city
like New York, Chicago or San
Francisco, to a stranger, especially
one from a foreign country, is about
the lonesomest place human being
could be in. To pass thousands of
faces day after day, without a friend
ly look from any one, without a word
of greeting. without even a smile or
glance of recognition, is most dis
heartening. 1t seems cruel, brutal,
uncivilized, yet it does not proceed
from unkindnesS, or because people
don't want to be friendly-it is Just
the custom.
But why should we of the nine
teenth century perpetuate such a Gus
tom? Why should strangers stare so
coldly at one another when a simple
smile and pleasant recognition would
be so pleasant? These people we
call strangers are really our brothers
and sisters, for the human family
are all children Of one Father. We
have not had an opportunity to know
the so-called strangers simply be-
cause our family is so vast.
Meeting strangers ought to be
something like a brother or a sister
going back to the old home after
many years of absence and finding
new brothers and sisters who were
not there when they went away.
Many of the people we don't know
in the conventional way may be more
akin to Us in tastes and ideals than
some of the members of our own
family. often see the faces of
strangers on the street and elsewhere
whom | long to know, for am con-
scious that there will be much in
common between us. They not only
have a kindly expression, but they
often look as though they knew what
l was thinking and really felt sorry
that custom forbade our speaking to
each other.
Some will object that the custom
OF speaking to strangers, regardless
of whether we know anything about
them, would lead to all sorts of un-
fortunate results, especially for girls
And answer that it does not do so
where it is practiced in the South;
and it would not do so in large cities
if it were made the general custom.
A pleasant recognition, a smile or a
friendly greeting, does not, of course,
mean that we go off with strangers,
or that girls would allow themselves
to be led astray by strange men.
During my first visit to a Southern
town, after living in New York many
years, was much pleased and sur
prlsed at the cordiality of people,
even to strangers on the street. The
first time I passed through the streets,
many people whom I had never seen
before bowed politely to me. The
'colored men would raise their hats.
The whole atmosphere Of cordiality,
of friendliness, was such a contrast
to the cold'atmosphere OF New York
that it made a lasting impression
upon me. l was so agreeably i'm
pressed that ever since | have really
thought l would like to live in this
little Southern city. Since that II
have found similar spirit in many
ot the Southern towns.
The American and English people
particularly arc cold and stony when
coming in contact with strangers. II
have sat down at table in a hotel
or restaurant opposite an Englishman
who made me feel that he wished |
would get out OF his way, that it was
a piece of impudence on my part to
sit down at the same table with him.
On the other hand, when travelling
in Continental countries, especially in
France. if we enter a restaurant and
sit down, those sitting opposite us at
the table, or perhaps at tables near
by, smile politely and thus makes us
feel at home.
Some of the brightest experiences
of my life have come from travelling
in strange lands and meeting strang-
ers who could not even speak nv
language, but who would give me
such friendly greeting in their facial
expression as to make me feel that we
were real friends
How different it is in our country!
New York men tell me that they
have passed men nearly every day for
years, without ever speaking to them
or showing any sign whatever of