New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1917-07-29

"How old 7" I asked with trepidation,
mindful Of the terrors which proven
bially await the rash intruder In the
mystery Of mysteries, the age Of love-
ly woman.
But there was no storm. Forty
two she replied, without hesitation
and without tho suspicion Of frown.
Manifestly, however, it was absurd.
"Madame!" protested, "you surely are
not over twenty-fve!" Then there was
half a suspicion of frown as she
reterted, "Now, now! No jollying, Mr.
Census Man." and went on to the next
question; while l wondered IL the ira
dition of woman's unwillingness to con-
TESS her full age must 60 the way Of
other vanished fantasies.
How old p asked the next one, and
again an incredible reply was given:
"Thirty-nine." "Yes," I responded;
"then you must have been born in"--
Eighteen eighty-six," was the prompt
reply; and PRECISELY" added, quito
fabbergasted, and wondering why there
wasn't a question as to the extent Of
her studies in primary arithmetic.
Many Overstated Ago
But so 1t went on all afternoon.
Women Of all degrees Of loneliness and
conditions Of fascination, giving their
ages, or what purported to be their
ages, without resentment or hesitation,
but with the most nonchalant disregard
of the testimony of the mirror and Of
the rules Of mathematics. And the
queer thing about it was that they gem
orally much overstated their ages
Why? Could 1t be in order to avoid
danger Of being drafted into some pub
he service? But then, women are not
slackersl
1t was an interesting study in fem
| mime psychology and in some other
things. But it set this one particular
census taker to wondering why il
would not have been better to make
the age question more general. Instead
Of getting down to the brass tacks Of
/ year, month and day, why not ask il
the subject Is between eighteen and
thirty, or between thirty and forty
| FIVE? Some such arrangement as that
would have secured just as accurate
results; and think Of the taradiddles-
euphemism for perjuries-and the wild
mathematical stunts that 1t would have
saved!
Still, 1t added to the interest Of my
work as census registrar, and that was
no small thing. had volunteered
| for service in that capacity in or
der that ! might do my bit" In the
war for humanity and democracy. A
non-partisan, naturalized citizen, In
tensely eager to fight for the land of
rejected at the recruiting stations and
elsewhere as "too old" But that was
no insuperable barrier to census SER
vice, and so | rejoiced to be assigned
10 duty as a registrar. knew the work
be not uninteresting. But never did
imagine that 1t would be such a me-
LANCE Of varied experiences-comedy
and tragedy, melodrama and farce; and
first, last and all the time, protean
human nature.
Few Knew How to Cook
II was not all asking ages, Of course
There were questions as to ability at
cookery, and at making garments. The
unanimity with which nearly all
pleaded mot guilty" was astounding.
II suggested that all the cooks and all
the dressmakers must be mere men.
Scarcely q woman had seen the inte-
rior Of q kitchen, or even a kitchen
cite, and acquaintance with so much as
a chatting dish was confined TO obser-
vations in restaurants. Again the ire
pressible speculation arose, Could these
things be? Were these answers really,
truly true7 Or was I, as census
registrar, presiding over a school OF
amiable perjury?
In one unforgettable case, though.
there was surely truth; pathetic and
all but tragic truth. She was about
twenty-one years old; apparently in
some domestic service; cheaply but
neatly and even tastefully clad; mod
est in demeanor, with sorrow and suf-
fering written clearly upon her face
the face Of Marguerite-after she had
known Faust. With timid air and
downcast eyes she falteringly asked
me TO fill out the form. | did so,
question and answer after question
and answer; all doubtless truthful.
Are you married." "No." :.
Then Of course there was no need TO
ask some OF the questions, about hus.
band and children. "How
many persons nre dependent upon you
FOR support" "One." "Ah, your