The Richmond Virginian. (Richmond, Va.) 1910-1920, 1917-11-11
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Sor1ewhere-in France, FIR.
October the middle, II.

| OCTOBER the middle, II.
Dear Pa:
/ got your letter and It makes me
feel powerful good to hear all the
news and local scandal. Although
the scandal has lost its smack to me
/ now since I am over here and all
hear is that the KIzzer did this and
I he kissed this gal and robbed that
and so on and ct cetry, From what
the human bean family. They are
telling a tale on him now about hav-
Ing pizen on the tips OF his whiskers
and everytime some general or duke
or whatnot goes agin his grain he
calls them up and makes g. ado over
them and tells them he is fixin' to
give EN- a iron cross and after he
pins it on 'em he pulls their face over
like he aims to kiss their cheeks and
all or a sudden he gives a lurch and
his whiskers pricks their mugs and
they swell up and pop and he has
some disabled soldiers hobble around
and pick them crosses up and uses
them on some other suckers. There
are lots of other tricks he's got up
his sleeve and he is settin' up nights
now practicing how he aims TO work
EN- on us American boys. All I got
to say is that II he pranks with me
with any of them tricks that Dutch
man what don't speak to you since
ma fined the w. G, r. Z. and you
voted wet and lives on Main st will
get whitfield down to the size of a
tooth pick as soon as / get home-
Ono OF the prettiest girls ever
seen walked right smack up to me
and kissed me on the Rue de Nor que
the other day. What do you think OF
that? They VIII kiss a American any
where over here. sometimes right on
the front porch.
Pa, you told me not to do no gam
bling but l amt aiming TO hold moth
ing back from you times like these
and I want to say that taken a
gamble yesterday, I am betting soc
n month to five thous. agfn tho gov.
that I don't get killed. Everybody
over here talks about how rich Uncle
Sam is and ] got the same notion
now, because can't no man give SIGH
fearful odds less he's got rich kin
| folks or is Croakus himself one or
the other or maybe both. don't know.
All these fellows over here 10 IN on
the gamble and pore old u. Sam
amt seen where he IN wrong yet
poAt IT. h4lH " NtkhiS oOWA AllCl
I get the wtld-buck tourist spirit out
OF my System and you kin tell ma
that I am going to have my life in
sured Just as soon az ! learn how to
talk yes to them French insurance
peddlers. Gambling don't pay and
ma had II right about playing II safe
and getting insured which means in
sured and that means you can't git
killed reckon.
The flowers over hero are beautiful
but these women folks amt got no
notion what to do with them. They
git right groggy on occasions and
throw them right In front of US right
In the middle OF the street The first
day they started this I tried to be
| like a gentiemun had ought to be
and pick them all up for the ladies
what was evidently excited and didn't
know what they was doing, but I am
cured now since that first day. The
captain come along ana seen me hop
ping along in the ranks with arm
| full Of roses and SIGH and asked me
what the hell allied met I said I
was a gentleman. Then he said who
cut your gentlemany head off. and I
come right back at him and said, No
body: II you had any eyes you could
see it setting right UP there on my
collar button. Then that was the time
I woke up in guardhouse and looked
out through only one eye owing to
the fact that a rose blossom had been
pushed in the other. / am out now
and, pa. you know never liked flow
srs much noway. especially roses and
them French roses to boot.
I eined up to buy a gov. bond and
I am paying q dollar mo. on IL and
ain't never seen 1t yet but guess It
Is shackle or something like a fet-
ter or something to tie the Kizzer
with according TO q explanation a Of
hcer said. He lowed buying them
was necessary In order TO hold the
Kizzer in check and lick him. SO you
see Ii they are going to de-. that at
a dollar week a soldier that l amt
made no rotten bargain. If you git
a chance buy one and they will give
you dandy button for your Sunday
coat huttonhole free gratis of charge.
You and ma take keer- of your
selves and 7 will be back presently
as soon az I git through this job
Tell little Benny to 1ine something
and come on over rs he gets a good
suit of clothes, free grub. a bed and
everything and thirty dollars a month
and that / will meet him at the depot
when be gets of the train.
Respt. your son,
AD0TPH