davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1917-06-08
GREAT DESERT IN AUSTRALIA
Suffering Attending Explorations in
Continent Have NO Parallel in
United States.

As record of human endeavor the
explorations of Australia constitute a
chapter In history for which the Unit
ed States has no parallel. The pioneers
who crossed the Alleghenies found fer
tile country beyond; the trappers and
traders on our northern boundaries
were in country abundantly supplied
with food and water: the men who
pushed their way across the great
plains had forage and water for their
animals and wild game for themselves.
The forty-niners who crossed the des-
erts of Utah and Nevada were en-
couraged by the knowledge of Califor-
mia beyond. Only the Spanish ex-
plorers from Mexico and pioneer trav-
elers through the deserts of Arizona
and southern California can appre-
ciate the suffering and understand the
failure of the heroic Australian scoGts,
says the National Geographic Maya
zine
The center of the great continent,
which their hopes had pictured as
grass-covered plains, fertile valleys,
lakes and timbered highlands, inter
spersed perhaps with arid stretches,
had turned out to be one of the most
extensive deserts in the world, into
which streams rising near the coast
were lost in a sea of rock and sand.
1t is as if the people of the United
States should wake up some morning
and ind that all the land between the
Alleghenies and the Sierra Nevadas
had been converted into plains like
the arid stretches of Utah.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1917-06-08
TOGO BECOMES A FIRE HERO

place where habtualy
found home of Hon Mrs Mr.
tell
This Mrs Fogg
haps it Maybe this Annie Island build
PROUD
Togo she otter with serious eyebrows there drop IRE
insurance this house!"
entitled
following information about when
"Chmbeys dangerous
ogged
chimbley is sprinkle salt down him until he quits.
before all
Valuable heroom be
taking them cut"
instructions prepared anything
sorry with
this Hnda
all time.
Togo" report making
o in the livery-sabe business"
avoid peril firmly
usefulness
are
They might sad printed among pictures"
She with Romeo expression
Nearly
You hear that smell of smoker" she require.
mic Mr.
fashion there bridge
gamble amidst society clothing Hon togg medium
also there acting like a husbandmal
hours while those sat there
call each insults
suddeny smell of
hre.!
with iced brain
Chimby shooting aks pnwhees his
rage
in
roof scramble along shingles with peculiar
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1917-06-08

Some mud-bespattered autoists were
attempting to reach Nashville, Brown
county. Even with chains on their
wheels they were wasting lots of gaso-
line in investigating washout or a
valley which they had left triumphant
~ only u few minutes before
Three times in three hours they had
asked the distance and each time had
received the same answer.
"Bout three miles to Nashville"
1t is true that in those three hours
they had had one blowout and once
they had to get a team of horses to
pull them out of the mud. But even
SO, it seemed as If they could not be
more than half mile away Finally
they met a man on horseback.
How far 10 Nashville? Three miles
/ suppose - But the fine sarcasm was
not lost on him. He grlnned and said
in soft voice:
you're most there. It's jest two
hoops and hollar away"--lndianapo-
lis News.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1917-06-08
His Threat.

A month or two after the war start
ed collier entered large hotel on
Tyneside and ordered refreshments.
saying: big prices moo; Aa might as
weel be big man."
On discovering that the waiter was
a German, the irate pitman, choking
with anger, leaped to his feet, ran the
affrighted Teuton 10 The door, and as
sisted him into the roadway with his
foot, and then, wheeling round upon
the trembling. expostulating proprie-
tor, he spluttered
Man. if ivvor We dare te set a thun-
dern' Jarman tie wait on me agyen,
Aa'Il twist We an him roond yor aan
necks, an ram tn pair o. We halfway
doom yor aan threats until thar's nowt
re be seen ov We but tn ends ov yor
dirty sh'rt-collars stickin' cot ov yOr
bloomin' red eyes. Moo We knaa what
tie expect if We de London Tit-Bits.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1917-06-08
Futility of EMO Trespass" Signs.

In the American Magazine David
Grayson comments as follows on q
farmer who covered his land with ''No
Trespass" signs:
Il did not need TO enter his fields,
nor climb his hill, nor walk by his
brook; but as the springs passed and
the autumns whitened into winter. ]
came into more and more complete
possession of all those fields that he
so jealousy posted. / looked with
strange joy upon his hill, saw April
blossom in his orchard and May color
the wild grape leaves along his walls.
June ! smelled in the sweet vernal
of his hay fields, and from the Octo-
Der of his naples and beeches / gath
cred rich crops-and pat up no hostile
signs of ownership, paid no taxes, wor-
ried over no mortgage, and often mar
yelled that he should be so poor with
In his posted domain and / so rich
without"
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1917-06-08
Much Too Much.

We eat too much. We heat too much.
We try too much to beat too much.
We growl too much. We scowl too
much We play the midnight owl too
much.
We ape too much. We cape too
much and daily with red tape too
much. We treat too much, and cheat
too much, and fear to face defeat too
much
We buy too much. We lie too much,
and SWIVEL and deny too much. We
save too much, and slave too much,
with one foot in the grave too much.
We sit too much. We spit too much.
wear shoes too tight to fit too much.
We mess TOO much and dress too
much; in sixteen suits or less too
much.
We spite too much. We fight too
much and seek the great white light
too much. We read too much. We
speed too much, hit dope and use the
weed too much We drink too much.
We prink too much. i think we even
think too much.-Oscar Schleif, in
Health Culture.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1917-06-08

Thos Cats pepper
ing Vesuvius cut of himself
which
e all other furniture"
complete blanket
blanket knuckles
Mrs
considerable calling Hassok
wetne Of behind
before anything
wetish blanket round her head.
her forthly to fresh air
of this meanness?" Hon.
Ffre!" yeup Why stand there making speech
when home is sparking?"
everybody making andladder
birdcage plush
Haock sdebod but nailed to
Hon Mis- assock down street breaking reaars out OF te
phone poles
But strong n knuckes.
cabinet roll
valuable dishes saved from FIRE
bedroom and pouring
household of window Mattress pitchers etc. fell ike
family landscape
the of Aunt Nesa Hodges make hor and struck
onhe of through Too bad.
n pokng brass bedsead through
Mr. escorted by Mrs Mr. liassock and
brainless all
form house baze?
Did nots chimbley This
of
burning Oveletters kitchen
GrOnes by
so my house report disappOint
midnight could hear rural hosecar
the iced quality of
should put it OUT"
entire interior her home lay
Hon Fogg gargle with his teeth
eewheres with immediate rapidness
observed setting Station await
morning train and feeling quite roasted
Hoping are the same,
HAsHIMURA TOGO
Copyright BY international
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1917-06-08

A party which plans an exploring
expedition in certain South American
rivers has purchased a shallow water
motor boat. The craft is % feet long,
has an eight-foot beam and is equipped
with an 1S-inch propeller. The latter
projects less than ten inches below the
lowest point of the keel, is situated in
a well or tunnel, and operates at all
times in q solid column, which extends
upward from the tunnel, draws the
water up into the latter and the col
umn to a depth of at least four feet
nine inches. The boat has draft
of but seven inches without a load,
and when carrying Is passengers
draws approximately ten inches of wa
ter. The motion of the propeller tends
to lift the boat from the water. The
boat is so shaped that it produces
practically no stern waves. The pur-
chasers believe that it will prove par
ticularly adapted to exploring shallow
streams and inlets. 1t is large enough
TO carry good-sized party, together
with their camp equipment and all
needful supplies, for considerable
period.-Popular Mechanics Magazine.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1917-06-08
SIR LAUNCELoT TO RESCUE
But Gallant Knight Left Fair Damsel
to Her Fate, According to Mod
ern Version of Story.

That's funny" unused Launcelot,
one of the knightly boarders at King
Arthurs table. That's funny" he
added, 81 haven't rescued a damsel
in distress for almost two weeks"
AT that moment piercing, but
sweet, scream issued from behind a
clump of laryngitis trees.
"Sic 'em, Semper URANUS
chuckled Launcelot, and spurred his
good steed Yea-Bo. Behind the
laryngitis tree he found a fair golden
haired, dark-eyed female bound hand
and foot, while a great hulking wretch
was tickling her lovely nose with a
feather.
"What no! Ho what" cried Laun-
celot, and prepared to spit the fellow
on his lance.
NAY, nay. good knight, good
knight" cried the dark, fair ones tor
mentor. do you give me leave to ex-
plain. This wench is my wife, and
many a time and oft have l warned
her it would go hard with her If
came home once more and found her
at the 'runnies' instead of home pre-
pairing supper. And but just now l
came home famished to find no sup
per and my wife at the 'runnies.'"
"Give it to her good. Go to it l'
said Launcelot and hied him hence
Detroit Free Press.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1917-06-08

and STAYED four weeks but when came
home would faint just the same and
had the same pains.
A friend who is a nurse asked me to
try Lydia E. Pinkham's Vegetable Com
pound. began taking it thatvery day
for was suffering great deal. thas
already done me more good than the
hospital. To anyone who is suffering
as / was my advice is to stop in the first
drugstore and get bottle of Lydia E.
Pinkham's Vegetable Compound before
YOU go home. - Mrs. w. C. BROWN,
2844 w. 18th St, Cleveland, Ohio.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1917-06-08
When Bread Was First Made,

TIT earliest instance Of the prepare
t3h of bread as an article of food is
found in the Bible in Genesis 1876.
The grain employed was of various
sorts. The best bread was made of
wheat, which, after being ground, pro-
duced the -four or meal. Barley was
only used by the poor or in urIe of
scarcity. "Spelt" was also used both
in Egypt aud Palestine. Tie bread
taken by persons on a journey Genesis
IA %; Joshua 9:12) was probably q
kind Of biscuit.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1917-06-08

/ could not stand
it any longer. 1t
was all in my lower
organs. At times /
could hardly walk,
for if | stepped on a
little stone I would
almost faint. One
day ] did faint and
m y husband W rs
sent for and the doc
tor came. Twas ia
ken tn the hosnifai
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1917-06-08

Now lie the Time 10 Get Rid of These
Ugly Suota,

Ugly EpOtBs
There's no longer the slightest need or
feeling ashamed of your freckles as the
prescription otAine double strength is
guaranteed otyemoVe these homely spots
Simply get ounce OF othine--double
strength-from your druggist, and apply a
little Of il night and morning and you
should soon see that even the worst freckles
have begun to disappear. while the lighter
ones have vanished entirely. II is seldom
that more than one ounce is needed to COM
pletely clear the skin and gain a beautiful
clear complexion.
BE sure to ask for the double strength
othine, this is sold under guarantee of
money back II II fails to remove frecE!ea-
Adv.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1917-06-08
A Real Patriot.

"You ought TO be proud Of your
boy"
1--WE are He volunteered to serve
his country without insisting on be-
ing enlisted as an officer" ,e
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1917-06-08
Certainly Not.

Gee, but she's fine-looking wild
ew!"
"of course! And if l We're widow
You wouldn't see me-"
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1917-06-08

Give some men a dollar and they
will believe anything you tell them.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1917-06-08

It's hard for the girl who throws
herself at mans head to make hit
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1917-06-08

Nothing pleases little man more
than an opportunity to act big.
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1917-06-08
FOUR WEEKS
IN HOSPITAL
40 ReIief-Mrs. Brown Fin.
ally Cured by Lydia E.
Pinkham's Vegetable
Compound

Cleveland, Ohio. =" For years / suf-
fsred so sometimes it seemed as though
Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1917-06-08
Tender.
enoer.
"She's tenderhearted."

Eyes. She says she couldn't think
of planting potatoes if she has to cut
out their eyes 10 do it,"
The Washington times., 1917-01-08
LOAN MEMco's ONLY HOPE
Railroad Head Says U. 8. Does Not
Favor Such a Move.

LONDON, Jan. S.-vincent Yorke.
presiding at a half yearly meeting
OF the Mexican Railway Company,
said that the railway had been re-
ceiyed back on September 1, after 1t
had been in the possession of the
Mexican government nearly two
years. Since its return the company
has had serious difficulties to con-
tend with, which are net yet ended,
he said.
Regarding the revenue earned, Mr..
Yorke said he could not speak def
nitely, as the valns OF the enormous
blocks of paper currency received was
uncertain. He did not know whether
the paper could be converted into gold
exchange. The silver earnings had
been encouraging, he said.
There was no option. but for the
directors to appeal to the holders OF
debenture stock for q further mora
forum. The debenture interest rum
ming against them already amounted
to an alarming figure, he said. and
they had other liabilities which would
have to be met sooner or later.
There is no real sign of q return
to normal conditions in Mexico, he
said. Intervention by the United
States, which during the revolution
airy period often appeared imminent,
seemed today remote and improbable.
The only alternative, II any lasting
good was to come, seemed to him
loan to Mexico by the United
States, but the United, States does
INTO consider the present govern
ment strong enough to be worthy OF
financial assistance.
The Washington times., 1917-01-08
URGES WORLD PEACE PACT
Or. Lowell Presents Plan Before
Chicago Gathering.

CHICAGO, Jan. S.-A plea for Amer
lea to enter a world pact to enforce
peace was made by DR.. A. Lawrence
Lowell. President of Haryard Univer-
sity, at a dinner at Congress Hotel
here tonight, given by a committee of
seventy - Chicago's most prominent
business and professional men, inter
ested in the League to Enforce Peace.
"Wars in the future are likely to be-
come more barbarous, il the world Is
to go on with great nations Standing
armed against each other, each plan
ming or fearing an attack, and each
preparing to the utmost for the
shock" said DR.. Lowell
Mankind is brought face to face
with the alternative of losing its
civilization in the blast of war, or
OF contriving some means OF stopping
war"
The League to Enforce Peace, DR..
Lowell said. was most likely OF all
plans proposed, to succeed, because
SIT proposes the use of force"
The Washington times., 1917-01-08
WHATS ON PROGRAM
Many interesting Events Of Import.
anee Are Scheduled.
Today

Concert, United States Marine Band Marin.
Barracks $50 D. m.
Meeting. North Washington citizens' Asso-
Meetin9 W WASH SSeoO'i ss, ?; m; :,
Peace Party. Willard, 4 D. m,
Meeting. Interior branch Of the Federal En-.
pIoyes Union. auditorium. Pythian Temple,
Meeting. Northeast Washington Citizen,' An.
ISOLATION, Northeast Temple. Twelfth and
II. streets northeast, s D. m
Annual dinner. New Hampshire State Asso-
citation. Dewey Hotel. 7:3O D. m.
Address, Highway Construction" John q
Crandel. before Engineering Society on
George washington University. at the Bu-
reau Of Standards, s o. m
Meeting. Vermont State Association. 1ofo Saw
enteenth street northwest, d. m
Meeting, Piney Branch Citizens ASSOCIATE
Iowa Avenue Methodist Episcopal Church,
Meeting, Legion OF Loyal Women. for install.
lation OF officers, Raleigh, s D. m
Safety First meeting. section g. American
Electric Railway Association, 81 Four
teenth street northwest. p. m.
Address. The Theory Of Foreign Exchange %
II. Parker Willis, before Washington Chap-
ter. American Institute Of Banking, chapter
rooms, 1914 F street northwest. s:i5 D. M
Illustrated talk on rife practice Major Will
liam c. Harllee, U. s. NJ c. before Mems
Club Of Mount Pleasant CongregationaI
Church. Columbia road and Fourteenth
street northwest, p. m.
Address. THE Relation OF Salesmanship In
struction in Our Public Schools to Actual
Business Problems" George s. DeNeale.
before class In salesmanship in Thompson
School. in school, p. m.
Meeting. board Of directors Washington
Board OF Trade. board rooms, 4:l5 D. m.
Recital for the blind, Miss Helen Belt EpIp-
hany Parish Hall. p. m.
Lecture. South America and Its PEOPLE -
DR.. Thornton B. Penheld. Y. W. c. A, s
d. m.
Meeting, Citizens Association Of Chevy
Chase, d. c., in Chevy Chase School, 8 D.
Masonic-Dawson. No. IS: Pentalpha, No. q:
Stansbury. No. "a; Temple, No. 10; Column
bia, No. IS, Eastern Star.
Odd FelIows-Union, No. II; Beacon, No. Is;
Langdon. No. rs: Esther. No. 5, Rebekahs.
knights of Pythias-Decatur, No 8; Calan-
the. No. II.
Knights Of Columbus-Potomac Council.
Meeting. Anti-War League, Public Library,
p. m.
The Washington times., 1917-01-08
Pests OF the Metropolitan
AFTER WALT WHITMAN.
Hail, Camerados!

Hail, Camerados!
I salute you,
Also salute the ticket speeulator.
the usher who does not ush, and
the athletic young man who sells
y "lye-brettos."
What Is an opera-goer, anyway?
Oh, chaos and eternal torment
Listen to the melody OF my steam
calliope.
I celebrate the pests OF the Opera
elevate my fogJwhistle. Inspired
by thoughts OF the Cheerful Idiot.
1. The PGglidcci Prologue; the match
less art OF Amato; the pause
near the close; the doltss who
start to applaud, the glares and
Kisses of their neighbors all un-
minding.
2. The ''vesti la Giubba;" from the
same opera; the impassioned elO-
quence Of Caruso; the orchestral
close and the pantomimed despair
of Canio; once again the untime-
" applause OF blunderers, their
neighbors' fury all unheeding.
J. The opera ~ TroUGtore; the "Di
Quella Pira:" the first high c of
Manrico: the frantic outburst of
fools who wait not for the cOpl-
pletion OF the aria; the black
looks and imprecations OF their
neighbors disregarding.
1 celebrate the pests of the Metropoli-
tan.
Whoop,
C 3. C.
The Washington times., 1917-01-08
BRASS BUTTONS And
GOLD BRAID WASTED
Officers on Maryland Govern.
or's Staff "AII Dressed Up
With No Place to Co."

BALTIMORE, Jan. S.-what would
you think IL you had been officially
appointed a colonel or a general or
something-on the governors staff
and had spent $500, more or less, on
your gorgeous uniform. and were get
ting away with it-when, out of a
clear sky, some gink came along and
ruled that the only place you could
wear that uniform was in the privacy
of your own bedroom? Wouldn't
tt?
Well, that's what they've done here.
Adjutant General warfield has given
out the ruling.
1T seems that under the recent Fed
eral act, governing the guard, the
War Department ruled against the
wearing of national guard uniforms
by any except regular members.
And the stan uniforms are sort of
glorifed guard uniforms-but the
members of the STAFF aren't glorffied
guardsmen.
So there you are.
But some say they're going to get q
uniform of their, own. Sort of Turk
sh-Prussian-diploma effect maybe,
to cost a thousand, more or less.
F. So who cares?
The Washington times., 1917-01-08
Individual Quite. UnfuIfIIIed.

1t Is claimed by the National Pop
ular Government League that there
has been great improvement In polit-
ical conditions since that organiza-
ton buckled down to its work, and
that in one county of Ohio 1901 men
were disfranchised by one of the
judges for selling their votes. That
woald not have changed the recent
result in that State; but 1t would be
interesting, to know who bought
them. 1t is one OF the strangest fea-
lures of these record-breaking times
how many organizations there are
for doing the things that good citI-
zens ought to do as individual citi-
zens in their own strength and not
as members OF organizations with
long names. Only a few years ago
many protests were made against
government by commission" as op-
posed to the spirit OF American in
stitutions; but the fashion has
changed until now 1t is almost i'm
possible to find any activity of gov
eminent that Is not conducted by
some sort OF commission.
The Washington times., 1917-01-08
THE COMMUNITY SPIRIT

Words come into fashion and gc
out again, much like clothes. Just
now the word Community" is very
much in vogue. We hear about com.
munity singing societies, community
forums, community celebrations, and
community projects of all sorts
Most of these are highly COM
mendable.
One reaction, though, of the fire.
quent use of this word is to spread
the idea that all this community en-
terprise is something new. Every
thing we have done is by way of
community effort. That is one thing
that most Americans do not under
stand and one thing which a study
of our most widely read American
philosopher, Emerson, might not in
culcate.
All this may be highly academic.
Just the same it is a wholesome
thing to pause, sometimes, and re-
member that everything we do is a
community thing. In the final
analysis, with apologies to "Uncle
Joe" Cannon, there. is no such thing
as "self-made man." The Germans
have grown to understand this more
than we have; hence many of their
finest achievements in cooperation.
Lord Dundreary humorously ques-
toned whether any bird would be
such "darned fool as to go off and
flock all by himself" and inherently,
no sane human being does it. We have
been doing things in groups for sew
eral hundred thousand years now,
and we have been getting better at it
all the time. There is still long
way to go. That is where the preach
ers of community effort can help.
The Washington times., 1917-01-08
GEMS ON COAL CART
Driver Saw Children Kicking Sc, 900
Case Around.

BEDFORD HILLS, N. Y, Jan. s.
Policeman Mccall called on Timothy
Fogarty. driver Of a coal cart in this
town.
How about that diamond studded
watch. the diamond necklace. and the
two diamond rings you found?" asked
the policeman.
Fogarty's eyes popped wide open
as he denied finding them.
"They were in a black leather
case" persisted Mccall.
II found a leather case" said Fog.
arty. "Some children were kicink It
around the road, and took it away
from them"
He led Mccall to the coal yard
where he works, and there on top of
the coal in his cart was the battered
case. When 1t was opened the Jew
elry worth $4,000 was found intact.
The case had been lost by a woman
guest OF the family of John Magee.
Mr.. Magee sent Fogarty sos for hav-
ing minded the case.