The Birmingham age-herald., 1917-06-28
tinguished themselves by the success of their Red Cross campaigns.

of their Red Cross campaigns. In an address to his troops, the Kaiser is reported to have said that one regi- ment accomplished deeds which will please Old Fritz up there in the Ely sian fields" Still, there's a possibility that "Old Fritz went down instead of up.
 Cannon salutes have been suspended for the duration of the war Sensible idea. There's no use wasting valuable ammuni- tion that will be needed to swat the Kaiser.
 In calling on American housewives to help prevent the waste of food, Mr. Hoover takes it for granted that most of them know what is going on in their kitchens
 Comparing the two in a recent photo graph, Secretary Daniels has boy in the navy who looks much more like a sailor than the Secretary does
 X *
 It will require no less than a thousand parades to do fitting honor to the Amer ican inventor who discovers some way to put U-boats out of business.
  writers have found two happy synonyms for strike out" the one being "whiff" and the other breeze"
 X * x
 However. those Washington police may thank their lucky stars that the ''suff pickets are not as obstreperons as Mrs. Pankhurst used to be.
 * * *
 German soldiers recently captured say they were promised peace by September Of course, Great Britain will be on her knees by that time.
 * * s;
 Grief for Poland caused Paderewski to quit playing the piano. Grief for Ireland has not caused John Mccormack to quit warbling ballads.
 The Germans are evidently determined to demolish Rheims slowly, in order that their enjoyment may last as long as pos- sible.
 "Suff' Hazel Hunkins was arrested in Washington. If you had a name like that, wouldn't you try to keep it out of print?
 You don't hear any more talk about starving out Germany for the simple req son that Germany is now self supporting. Chicago will not incur the i'll will of the rest of the country by impeaching Mayor Thompson
 * * *
 Alfonso would rather be President of Spain than an ex-king without a job of any sort
 Score another failure for the U-boats! American troops have arrived in France * *
 LUKE MLUKE SAYS
 A lot of the fellows who married to avoid fighting are going to be badly fooled when they discover that married life is constant battle.
 For the one man who can't talk when he has tn others who can't keep silent when they have nothing to say.
 The man who has failed at everything else can always make some money by Writing book on how to succeed.
 Nowadays it takes as much money to carry a stock of meats and groceries as 1t does to carry a stock of jewelry It may be mean thing to say, but it is the truth that it is the fear of get ting caught that keeps most men straight.
 We are living too fast It has just about gotten so that a girl starts in using a powder rag before she quits play ing with dolls Every married woman knows that her husband is careless with his money and that he would as soon pay $1 for an ar ticle as walk four more squares and get It for 98 cents. The old-fashioned boy who used to have to do the chores and then wrasse with churn for two hours before he walked two miles to school every. morning now has son who lives two squares away from the school and insists on being driven there in a machine. We have often wondered what the magazines would do for advertising ix automobiles and underwear had never been invented. Somehow or other luck seems to like to hang around with a man who works hard, minds his own business and keeps his nose clean. Don't laugh at the fellow who is al- ways making good resolutions. If he keeps a good resolution only "A hours it has done him at least a days good. Father can't understand why mother can't remember who won the pennant In 1914 and who was lightweight champion in 1910. But when father wants to know the price of pork chops and sugar and eggs, he has to ask mother