davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1917-12-26
CAPITALIZING HUSBANDS

From tire Chicago News
If the gifted press agent is to be be-
lieved, Nine. Sasha Votichenko, the
wife Of Russian musician now touring
this country, has evolved a new plan
for the government and utilization Of
husbands. Nine. Votichenko has incor-
porated her willing spouse and retains
majority of the stock, common and
preferred, in her own fair hands,
This procedure apparently solves the
troublesome problem of home manage
ment'' that SO long has puzzled the So
biologists. To be sure, it appears to
re-establish in terms the long denied
right of property in persons, but as a
matter of fact this same right is one of
the basic principles of matrimony and
may as well be legally acknowledged.
Moreover, as a corporation husband
is not, strictly speaking, person, but
plant. The wife in the case is
merely majority stakeholder, but as
such she has voting control and can
compel, under penalties of the law, the
! fulfillment of all requirements affect
ing the welfare of her investment.
Perhaps If more homes were organ
lied on this sound business basis, with
contracts in clear, legal form, there
would be fewer appeals to the courts
for dissolution of existing partnerships.
One can foresee, however, the devel-
opment by enterprising women of a has-
band trust and finally the establish
ment of an exchange wherein there will
be brisk trading in domestic securities.
good provider" many find himself
paying dividends to a dozen or more
stockholders.
Truly, women are progressing. But the
outlook Tor husbands may have been
roster in less enlightened eras.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1917-12-26

From the Chicago Herald.
MN HE tempest which has ragged in a
tobacco pot over the question of
& smokes for soldiers ever since
America entered the war has hardly af-
fected the course of events. Tobacco in
large quantities has been sent the boys
and will continue to be sent. The larger
the better. But there are still thou
sands, perhaps millions, of good women
of both sexes, many of them mothers,
who are emotionally ruffled by the idea.
They think in syllogism crammed with
logic. Tobacco is harmful to young
man; a soldier is generally young man;
therefore tobacco is harmful to soldier.
There is in this syllogism one doubtful
premise and one fallacy. Tobacco is not
harmful to all men. Many of the best
men in the world have accomplished their
best work under the comforting influence
of the weed. Granted, for the sake of
argument, that tobacco is not good for
the health. Most of us would rather have
IS per cent of the health our constitu-
tions allow us and 10 per cent more peace
OF nina. Harmful - d WOlu eHe't ilOSNis'
careful definition. One who can do bet
ter work when he smokes would not al
low tobacco to be harmful to him, even
If he knew it shortened his life by a
year.
Furthermore, the soldier is not only a
Young man He is a very special type
of young man, in very extraordinary cir
cumstances. His first concern is not mis-
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1917-12-26

Secretary w. S. Sailing of the army
Young Mems Christian association at
Camp Wheeler is in Birmingham for a
few days. He received a wire from one
of the building secretaries yesterday Civ
ing a days record in one of the associa-
ton units which indicates the magnitude
OF the work the association is doing in
the camps
I'm that one building" said Mr.. Stall
lipgs, 1000 letters were written and
mailed and over $500 worth of stamps
were sold, 400 packages handled and
mailed for the soldiers, three religious
meetings conducted, the building crowded
all day and up to $50 at night. This is
one of 600 units in the camps in this
country and if you multiply this record
by 600 you will get some idea of the
service the association is rendering the
enlisted men in the camps in this coun-
try.
"Ycu can multiply this record by 1000
and get some vague idea Of the magni-
tude of the work among the enlisted men
of the allied armies. The building sec
rotary reports that several of the secre-
taries at Camp Wheeler are sailing for
France this month, and many others to
go early in the new year.
Alabama is sending many of her
strongest men into the ranks of the as
scciation to serve in this and other coun-
tries. Announcement will be made be-
fore the end of the year giving the
names cf several of the prominent men
of the city who have agreed to enter
the army Young Mems Christian asso-
citation work in France.
THE association is handling thousands
of boxes, packages and other forms of
Chcistmas gifts to the soldiers, and the
secretaries are working night and day
to meet this extra responsibility"
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1917-12-26
New Orleans and
Atlanta too Slow

Nh HE nation as a whole has gone
q far over its quota of 10000, 900
in the Red Cross Christmas drive for
new members, but several of the large
cities, in both north and south, are
considerably short of their allotments.
New Orleans is one of the disap-
pointments, but the canvassers will
continue to work until New Years day
with the hope of reaching the mark
set for it. There are no more gener-
Gus hearted people in this country than
those who make up the citizenship
of New Orleans, but it is evident that
the Crescent City is short ON organi-
zation at this time Of the year. New
Orleans made fine records in subscrib-
ing for the liberty loans and raising
money for the Red Cross 100000
900 fund; and it will do its full part
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1917-12-26
LUKE M'LUKE SAYS

Marriage is never quite as important
as the elaborate preliminaries would
seem to indicate.
Nearly every man who smokes cigars
owns cigar case that he never thinks
of carrying
We hate to seem cynical But the fact
is that many a divorce causes more joy
than did the wedding preceding it.
If men had the gift of second sight.
there would be mighty few cases Of
love at first sight. j
The average missionary is so anxious
to do good in a distant continent that
he hasn't time to bother with a nearby
tenement.
best brand of red eye And every
! woman imagines that hers is the best
brand of baking powder
When David figured that all men were
liars he didn't take in any too much ter
ritory. The only mistake he made was
in not including the members of the
other sex.
There will always be the high cost of
living to wrassle with as long as one
woman thinks 1t is her duty to dress
better than another woman.
Why is it that you can't keep a boy
out of water in summer ana can't get
him into water in winter?
We often knock the women. But this
world without woman would mean stag
nation and damnation.
| The reason why most Of us are over
worked is because we have to catch
| up on the time we wasted in loafins.
F! A woman never thinks of talking about
| her neighbors-unless it is bad enough
| to repeat.
1t is hard for a hero to act that way
when he steps ON a wooden collar button
with his bare foot
A jury may not get to read the news
papers. But it manages to find some
other basis for it's prejudices.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1917-12-26
Kaiser's Plans Will
Fall on Deaf Ears
y * *

MESPITE rumors OF peace ana ne
~ gotiations between German dip
lomats and Bolsheviki representatives,
the allies will continue to bend all
their energies toward the defeat OF
Prussianism. There can be no safety
for this world as long as the power
which drenched it in blood is still SUI
preme, with its potentiality for evil
increased rather than abated. The al
ane of the irrefutable
at Hanh cut by the war.
The Kaiser's specious talk of peace
at this time, with a big stack of
chips on his side of the table, is mere
ly bit of diplomatic camouflage. His
threat that if the allies do not accept
a peace made in Germany the con-
sequences will be on their own heads,
invites ridicule. Statements of that
sort are intended chiefly for home
consumption and for effect on those
neutrals who apparently do not yet
think the Hun is as bad as he is
painted. How a belief of that kind
can still obtain in enlightened coun-
tries, passes comprehension. However,
there are many indications that pub
lie opinion practically everywhere has
become adverse to Germany.
1t may be depressing to think of the
war going on four or five years more,
yet well-informed persons in Wash
ington know that our government is
basing it's calculations on a continu-
alton for at least four years. Neither
do our allies expect the war to end
at any time soon-not even if Italy
were eliminated, as Russia has been.
There is little likelihood of the
Kaiser offering new terms of peace
that would be Acceptable to the allies,
for the simple reason that the Kaiser
is not yet beaten. When this war ends
the world has about made up it's mind
that we shall never have another. But
we can have no assurance of safety
until Prussian militarism and the men
behind it are put down forever.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1917-12-26

one more proof that the greatest in
fluence for the development of musical
taste was to be found in the class
room. Others who have had an OPP
Iportunity of observing cultural agen-
cies, have reached the same conclus-
ion.
Educators throughout the country
now realize the Importance of music
as part Of the curriculum of public
school and college. In all the large
cities school children are taught to
read music just as they are taught
other branches of education.
Among southern cities Birmingham
has long been leader in respect of
public school music. At first the
music department was confined to the
thigh school, but now music, vocal and
instrumental, is found in the primary
grades. Only few weeks ago, fea-
ture of the community entertainment
was the performance of group of
short pieces-simple, but artistic-by
an orchestra made up of rs children
under the baton of Miss Kits, the
capable director of our public school
music.
| Rural as we'll as city schools are
now giving instruction in music, and
| if any community is tagging behind
in musical pedagogy in its school, pub
| lie sentiment will, in time, cause the
school authorities to get Gin line" and
lput their town on the musical map
just as the Shohone board has done.
Musical appreciation comes from
hearing the best, as well as from
correct teaching, in primary schools,
but if America is to become distinct
ly musical nation-a nation where
a love of master works is the gen.
eral rule-the basic instruction must
be traced to the public schools.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1917-12-26
Christmas Liquor
Stopped in Louisville

mn Q doubt many a Christmas spree
y v was postponed indefinitely be-
cause of the vigilance of federal au-
thorities in Louisville. The Associated
Press stated yesterday that 500 quarts
of liquor had been detained" while
on its way to such arid regions as
Alabama and Tennessee. Suspicious
packages carried by travellers and
freight parcels were examined, with
the result that the aforesaid 500
quarts will never reach their desti-
nation.
According to the same dispatch, "In
"a large Alabama center, it is said,
the prevailing price is So quart and
upward" If reference is made to Bir-
mingham, the latter part of that state
ment is correct, but bibulous persons
in this city have long since quit try
ing to buy quart of whisky for So.
1t is simply not procurable. The av-
erage visitor with money and thirst
gladly pays S. for any kind of IL
quor that bears a government stamp,
and he frequently has to do without.
In six months from now, it is quite
safe to predict that any recognized
brand of whisky will be selling in Bir-
mingham for $40 quart.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1917-12-26
WORKING FOR $25 A YEAR

! well ventilated shelter for hens? And if
so, what will it cost?
| Keeping the house and yard clean is
a matter of time and labor only That
the amateur poultryman can do, or could
If he had the time. Providing roosts and
nests is a matter of money and carpen-
| try Carpentry may be hired at fancy
prices or done crudely before breakfast
or after dinner, or upon Sundays Pos
sibly some green crop could be induced
to grow in the backyard, but grass never
has been green enough to mistake the
front yard for meadow. 1t has tacitly
but firmly declined to grow.
1t would be possible, no doubt, to
Spade up the yard frequently but it
would be sacrifice of bright after
Moons in summer when there is sure to
be a ball game. And would the green
crop like the yard being spaded up FREE
quently? Would it not be discouraged,
or feel a sense of intrusion, or turn tur-
tie?
Feeding the table sears and kitchen
waste is no easy mat Nr Ut " necessary
to give away the dos and cRecf sa ee
terte with the cook. Won aat a.aas
give away dog, ara yea 8H ha
ever poke about in tAt kitsHes tef0Ct
offending the cook. And sFs aa
to be no table scrans while tna wgl asks
| if you are pat
"Feed grain ono day. VT oauHal
be gotten at the jeweirs 4tora put at
the feed store around the corner they
charge jewelry store prices for grains of
corn, and tell you Mr.. Hoover's injunc-
ton as to feeding wheat to chickens is
Don't" while the department of agricul-
ture says they will eat rye, but will not
| lay eggs on rye diet, preferring, SEEM
| ingly, a corn, or, you might say, bour-
bon ration, plus the forbidden wheat.
Feed mash" U-m?
Evidently research is necessary. The
dictionary defines "mash" as "a mass of
| mixed ingredients reduced to ~ soft and
pulpy state by beating pressure; a
| mass of anything soft or pulpy; a mix
ture of meal or bran and water STEPPED
or stirred and fed to animals; a mess, a
trouble
Keep hens free from lice and mites"
Do you devote evenings to it, or Satur-
day afternoons, or national holidays and
are they spry and wary like fleas?
If You carry out the programme to
the letter and in the spirit of the let
tel you get, possibly, and as a maximum,
a gross profit of SIS year for your la
Dor, finding your net profit by deducting
the cost of the fowls and interest and
depreciation and upkeep on the plant
Does it pay?
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1917-12-26
"DERELIcTs OF THE AIR.

Julian Street, in the Saturday Evening
Post.
Once while gathering information,
had to question British birdman for
long time 1 knew he hated being
questioned, so presently l apologized.
Its a shame said. Il know that
, everyone you meet asks questions I
know how it bores YOU"
"Well-yes," he admitted But you
have to get your article. That's all
right. The thing one really minds is
idle, silly questions. They ask you: Is
| it cold in the air?' And they're always
asking how we can ever laugh and joke
together when things are pretty bad
when sometimes four of us start off to-
gether from our quarters in motor in
the morning and perhaps three, or two or
only one comes back in the evening.
They ask us how we manage under those
circumstances to go on as usual. But
don't see what else we could do, really.
How else could we act?
"Once I was at dinner with some
other flying corps chaps at big hcr,S1
T in England. There was dowager at
| the table and she kept asking questions
Everyone tried to shut her off 0sf fel.
lows all tried; even the hostess I5ad
but 1T was no good. At last IL gct Us
rather out of patience. Awful questions,
too. Finally she turned to a pal Of
mine and demanded: If your engine
stops when you're in the air. can you
get DOWN.
mo madam he said. That's the
annoying part of it. If your engine
stops you have to stay up. AS mat
ter of fact the upper ar is full of our
| poor comrades, drifting about and
slowly starving to death. Their engines
have stopped and they can't get down. .
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1917-12-26
Christmas Shopping

II am certainly glad the Christmas
shopping period is over" said Arnold
Masbery, a local druggist. although
Christmas time brings much pleasure,
the heavy work on business people
cannot be overlooked
"The shoppers were the most con-
genial and easily pleased group l
have served for years, and I must ad :
NIT 1 did get some pleasure out of
accommodating them. 1 found that ev-
erybody spent their money freely and,
judging from the nature of my sales,
the boys in the trenches were not for
gotten"
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1917-12-26
AmaEzMMdAaut6H
"a PROMISING POET.
From the Mobile Register.

From the MoDlle Register.
In an editorial on THE Unused Talent"
the Greenville News quotes the follow
ing from writer named Gray:
Full many a gem of purest ray serene.
The dark unfathomed caves of ocean
bear,
Full many flower is born to blush I'M
seen,
And waste it's sweetness on the desert
air."
The News does not give Mr. Gray's in
itials or tell where he lives, but the lines
he wrote are so pretty that we expect to
hear from him again. There Is a flaw,
however in what he wrote-due doubt
less to haste. 1t is SO patent that 1t will
appear to the average reader and SO we
feel that pointing it out is ALMOST a
work of superrogation But for the sake
OF those who are not quite up to the
average, we mention The fact that it Is
in the third line. A flower is not born;
1t blooms
1t is probable that Mr.. Gray. whether
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1917-12-26

in the membership campaign, albeit
slow about it.
But what is the matter with At
lanta? That is a good sugges-
ton of John Sparrow that J. Frank
Rushton send a detachment of his
light artillery to the Georgia city to
help it out. Such an act would be the
height of neighborliness and should
meet with local approval.
4 =
White House pickets VINO have served
prison terms are carrying banners which
read, Jailed! Why Released! why?"
Both of those questions are easy to an
swer, but it is waste of time to argue
with White House picket.
y =
Wisconsin is determined to attend to
Senator LaFollette if, Congress fails to
do it's duty There is more simon-pure
Americanism in Wisconsin than the pop
uation of Milwaukee would indicate
3 * *
A Harvard professor will return to the
Kaiser the Order of the Prussian Crown,
with which he was decorated some years
ago He is one professor who will never
be bounced for seditious speeches.
* !: i
Five hundred quarts of liquor were
seized in Louisville on their way to dry
states. Following that coup, there was
bound to be more or less disappointment
in Alabama.
Bolshevik, who landed at a Pacific
port Immediately began to fraternize
with dock loafers and NV. w mem
beers. Why not? Birds of a feather flock
together.
The allies now owe Uncle Sam total
of nearly $4,oOoO0O,0OO And it's worth
while, noting that there is plenty more
where those four billions came from.
* 81 X
New Orleans Red Cross drive was a
failure, Birmingham's more than sue
cess. "Going over the top is getting to
be habit with Birmingham.
* * *
Judge Hylan urged New Workers to cell
citrate Christmas as merrily as ever. an
appeal concurred in by Gotham's walters
y y y
Visitors to Broadway find the famous
thoroughfare changed by war condi-
tons. However, it is sun gay in spots.
The boys in the trenches want lively
stories to read, so don't send them any
late Iucubrations of Dr. Dryasdust.
- * y
ca is not surprising. He has been act
ing lately as if he hated himself.
y x y
Christmas ties make a noise in the
land, but ''high yellow" Christmas gloves
are close competitors.
* - i.
The British say the American censor
ship is too lax Maybe so, but in Amer
lea it's everybody's war
Il i /:
Auto bandits are showing a fine dis
regard for the high cost of gasoline.
* y X
The beef barons long ago demonstrated
their ability to stand punishment.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1917-12-26
SNOWFLAKES
BY Longfellow.

BY LOngfellOW.
Out OF the bosom of the air,
Out of the cloud folds of her garments
shaken,
Over the woodlands brown and bare,
Over the harvest fields forsaken,
Silent, and soft, and slow
Descends the snow.
Even as our cloudy fancies take
Sudden shape in some divine express
sion,
Even as the troubled heart doth make
| In the white countenance confession,
The troubled sky reveals
The grief it feels.
This is the poem of the air,
| Slowly in silent syllables recorded;
This is the secret of despair.
Long in its cloudy bosom boarded,
Now whispered and revealed
To wood and field.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1917-12-26

From the New York Sun.
OF the loot taken from the Church of
the Holy sepulchre by the defeated and
retreating Turks, the famous ostensory,
or monstrance, of brilliants has been
sent to the Kaiser in Berlin to take it's
place beside similar relics collected by
the imperial German governments
troops, or those of its allies. in the
course of the war
This trophy of war will unquestion-
ably please it's new possessor. 1t will
serve as evidence of the acquisition of
kultur by the Turks. 1t will consti-
tute an enduring testimonial to the
efficiency that Prussian masters have
imposed on their co-belligerents
No commander except a Turk cor
rupted by Prussian overlords would loot
the Church of the Holy Sepulchre. II
any man suggested to General Allenby,
the conqueror of Jerusalem, that he
should remove from the church its sa-
cred vessels, to send to King George
he would be expelled from the camp; if
an insane man should gather them up
and escape with them to France or
Italy, or Petrograd, or Japan, or to any
OF the other countries arrayed against
Germany, he would be punished, and
they would be returned The BolshevilSi
might rob the church, but the Russian
people would scorn the act.
But the Prussian system is different.
The world learned of it in the Boxer up
rising. 1t reaches out for the astrono-
mlcal instruments of China, and it ac-
cepts the monstrance from the Church
of the Holy Sepulchre; and the Kaiser
will keep the monstrance if he can.
For such is the nature of kultur.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1917-12-26
A soApLEss WORLD
From the Chicago Tribune.

If the war goes on indefinitely this
may yet be soapless world Germany,
whera seAp Vas first made, Is soapless
all eacg History teaches US. however,
tbs tie Wor1a was soapless for quite a
banAt4 e4 eenturies, and tolerable
encnss worla despite that The soap
me 5n9N HI the Old Testament con-
sis aa "a vess able ashes. 1t was soap
Only ~ courtesy of mistranslation
TIE glofs that was Greece knew nothing
of soar Ita grandeur that was Rome
made gi.e ac4eaintance of soap only IN
Plsns Gay = soapless world used olive
Oil lHsfsAd.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1917-12-26

BEGINNING THE DAY-Help me
this day to demand of myset COM
munion with Thee. Give me triumph
over the obstacles. Heal my dis-
eouragements. Cure my ind1fier-
ferences. Take away the sin that
keeps me back. Grant to me new
realization that my place is in Ihy
presence. In Christ's name. Amen
III. Nj. Z.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1917-12-26
Struck New Note

After all of the great speeches we
have listened to recently at the Tutwiler
lunches" said Gully Exum, II thought it
would be hard for anyone to give us.
new sensation, but DR.. j. A Duncan, at
the closing session on Saturday, struck
a new note in his talk on England"
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1917-12-26
Wants Light on Fifth Avenue
Great Women i'm Birmingham

II was greatly interested in the story
in The Age-Herald about Mrs. Leonard
I. Beecher," said Ben Moore. ut brought
to my attention the fact that we have
quite number of truly great women
here in Birmingham.
Some of them are leaders in society,
some leaders in the churches, some lead
ers in charity, some in civic matters, and
some are destined to lead in politics.