Cheyenne record., 1917-11-29

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ward the future. complete In Itself,
perfect-was q failure.
It was not until. pretty Fuefully.
they acknowledged this. tore up their
artificial resolution not to look at the
future. and deliberately set themselves
to the contemplation Of life that
would have to take into account COM
plex and banning considerations, that
their honeymoon became success.
1t was well along In their month that
this happened.
Rose had spent a maddening sort Of
day, a day that had been all edges,
trying not to let herself feel hurt over
fantastic secondary meanings which IL
was possible to attach to some Of the
things Rodney had said. trying to be
cheerful and sensible, and to ignore
the patent fact that his cheerfulness
was as forced and unnatural thing
as hers. The children-as a rule the
best-behaved little things in the world
had been refractory. So. after their
supper, when they'd finally gone of to
sleep, and Rose had rejoined Rodney
In the sitting room, she was in state
where 1t did not take much to set her
of.
It was not much that did; nothing
more. indeed, than the fact that she
found her husband brooding in front
Of the fire, and that the smile with
which he greeted her was a little too
quick and bright and mechanical, and
that It soon faded out. The Rodney
of her memories had never done things
like that. II you found him sitting in
a chair. you found him reading a book.
When he was thinking something out
he tramped back and forth, twisted his
face up, made gestures. That habit
couldn't have changed. It was Just
that he didn't care to be natural
with herL Couldn't feel at home with
her! Before she knew It, she was cry
ing.
He asked, in CONSERVATION, what
the matter was.
Nothing" she said. Absolutely
nothing. Really"
"Then it's just-that you're not hap
py, with me, like this" He brought
that out gravely, word at a time.
as though they hurt.
"Are you happy, with me-like
thIsT she countered.
It was question he could not an
swer categorically, and she did not
give him time for anything else.
whats the matter with us, RoddyT
she demanded. 1--WE ought to be hap
py. We meant to be-" Her voice broke
in sob over that. "And here we are
like this!'
"It hasn't all been like this" he
said. ''There have been hours, a day
or two, that I'd go through the whole
thing for, again, If necessary"
She nodded assent to that. 'tBut the
rest Of the timel" she cried. "Why
can't we comfortable together?
Why -. Roddy. why can't you be
natural with me7 Like your old self.
Why don't you roar at me. any moref
And swear when you run into thingsf
I've never seen you formal before
not with anybody. Not even with
strangers. And now you're formal
with me-" L-..
The rueful grin with which he ac-
knowledged the truth Of this indict-
ment was more like him, and it cheered
her immensely. She answered 1t with
one Of her own, dried her eyes, and
asked again, more eollectedly:
"Well. can you tell me why?"
"Why, it seemed to me-" he said,
..'that it was you who were different.
And you have changed. of course,
down inside, more than have. You've
been through things in the last year
and half, found out things that
know nothing about, except as have
read about them in books. So, when l
remember how things used to be be-
tween US, how used to be the one who
knew things. and how I preached and
spouted, I get to feeling that the man
you remember must look to you now,
like-well, like a schoolboy showing
or"
She stared at him incredulously.
"But that's downright morbid" she
said. "It's horrible that should make
you feel like that" she concluded.
'It isn't you," he told her. "It's
just the situation. can't help feeling
that I'm taken on approval. Oh, it's
got to be like that! There are things
that, with all the forgiveness in the
world, you can't forget. And until
you have seen that am different, that
I have made myself different. :"
She give shaky laugh. "On ap-
proval" Her eyes filed again. "Rod-
dy, you can't mean that" She came
over and sat down in his lap, and slid
her arm around his neck. 'This Is
where we'll beginl" she said. 'That
I'll never-whatever happens-walk
out on you again. Whether things
60 well or badly with us, we'll work it
out. somehow, together"
It was not until she heard the long,
shuddering sigh he drew at that, and
fe1t him 60 linn under her that she