The Washington herald., 1917-08-05
Good Morning, Judge .
Human Interest Stories Of
Police Court Happenings.
By
RUDOLPH
PERKINS

sometimes buys lot of rings from
the l0-cent store and puts tags on
them with 81. $3, IS and SO price
marks on them and wraps them in
tissue paper and begins his days
work.
II he secs an easy mark coming
down the street. BaHy pretends he
found the ring and wants to sell it.
The stranger sees the price mark
and the tissue paper and sometimes
thinks the ring is real and buys It
from Baily. giving him sometimes as
high as $40 for 1t and goes home and
kicks himself or herself. Business
has been rather dull lately, the one
that was born every minute did not
show up. and Baily was arrested for
vagrancy.
Judge Pugh said that anyone who
gave Baily so for Decent ring was
the person who ought to be arrested
and that IL the public supported Baily
In his little game he could not hold
him for vagrancy. Dismissed.
The Brickyard fo- Bill.
There is one man in town who can
find bricks when the contractors are
all up in the air about the shortage.
He is Bill Stewart. Last Thursday
Bill was standing on the corner.
never mind where, and to all intents
and purposes he was minding his own
keenan,, whom Bill had had some
words with few days previous.
No one saw a brick lying around,
and Bill certainly did not have it in
his pocket. because IT would have
bulged' and keenan, would not have
walked that way. Some more words
were exchanged. and from some mys-
terious place Bill got hold of brick
and nearly put Keenan, to sleep with
a knock over the head. The brick dis
appeared again. Not even the cop
could find 1t. But bricks are numer-
Gus at Occoquan's brickyard. and
there is where Bill will live for thirty
, days.
There's a Reason.
"Jedge, this yere womun wouldn't
cook nah poak chops an taters."
This is what Charlie Brice told
Judge Pugh in court yesterday
morning as an excuse of his using
his No. IL shoe on his wife. Charlie
went to the store and bought the
eatables and asked rwifey to start
the kitchen fire and cook them.
But wifey had something else to
do. 1t seems, and Charlie was SC
hungry that everything else, even
the war, paled into insignifcance
And SO he did a very impolite thing.
He kicked his better half. Anyhow
Charlie says that wifey hooked q
| brand new pair OF shoes that he
Just bought and bought a pint OF
gin and he said she did other rash
things and when she refused tc
cook his meal, he happened to be
In Just the right temper to kick her.
Lawyer Jones defended Charlie sc
well that the court only fined
him IS.
Now You Understand.
A vagrant is a person who has
no visible means of support, one
| that tries to sew up all the booze
in town and otherwise leads an inn
moral and profiigate life. A soldier
is a recognized means OF defense
or offense in the service OF a gov
ernment. He has a visible, very
visible. means of support in the per-
son of Uncle Samuel. who isn't a
poor man by any means.
Now that we have the two sepa
rated. we can see what happened
Hiram Morris, member of the En-
gineer Corps at the Washington
Barracks, was arrested Friday on
| charge of vagrancy. And, OF
course. Kaiser Bill laughed because
| spy cabled over to him that, ow-
ing to the lack OF something to do
the army was loahng around when
it ought to be in the trenches
Hiram had his uniform on and when
he faced Judge Pugh. the court
recognized familiar looking bunch
| of clothes and wondered what is to
become of democracy. And. nat
urally. there was nothing left to dc
but to let Hiram go.
Gude's Flowers Are Favorites.