The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1917-09-06
Dorothy D11 Says
BY DOROTHY DIX
Worlds Highest Paid Woman Writer

Model Husbands and
Wives at Discount.
1t appears that the ideal husband
and wife, who are models of all the
virtues, are only desirable as long as
they are intangible ideals, and that
when they rnaterialize in real life,
they make no hit with those who have
the luck to be married to them.
In witness whereof consider these
two news items reported the other day
in the press:
A 17-year-old Ohio wife who eloped
from her husband excused herself by
saying that the reason she left home
was because her husband was too
good and kind to her.
HE is too NICE" she told the judge
of the domestic relations court. Il
know he is a model husband He has
no bad habits and is always at home
at night. He treats me beautifully
and only smiles and kisses me when L
say mean things to him, and it got on
my nerves so that 1 couldn't stand it
any longer. If he had abused or bull
lied me, 1 would have liked him bet
ter"
This is woman's point of view on
the model husband. The masculine
opinion of the model wife is equally
| lacking in enthusiasm. A New Jer-
| sey man who was arrested a wife
deserter claimed that the reason that
/ he fled from his hearthstone was te-
cause his wife just loved him to
| death.
| MY wife was too affectionate, he
! said. She was so conSiderate of me
that she was uncomfortable My ego
| requires strife to create perfect hap
= pineSs''
And there you are. with the cynical
reflection that however much virtue
may be its own reward in the other
relations of life, in the domestic rela-
tons it doesn't pull down any reward
| at all.
Also, it leaves you rejecting upon
the difficulty of doing ones duty in
| the holy estate, for apparently marital
happiness is just as much endangered
| by goodness as badness. One is just
as liable to be cherished for ones
weaknesses and faults as for ones
strength and nobility. and the partner
| of ones bosom may possibly OCCASION
ally find black eye or a tongue lash
ing more interesting than an unbrok-
en- succession of kisses and soft words
| What is one to do, then, to keep
| matr1mony perpetually interesting to
| the party of the other part? Must
| the man be a bit of brute? The
woman bit of shrew? OF course,
all the moralists teach the husband
that he should be tender, and patient,
and long suffering towards his wife,
and the woman that she must be a
1 and
| that if they follow these rules they
cannot fail to inspire the deepest af-
fect!on and appreciation and gratitude
in the hearts of those to whom they
are united.
Unfortunately, common observation
does not bear out this cheerful theory
When we look about among our ac-
qua1ntanceS we see that by some mys-
ferrous juggling of fate most of the
model wives and husbands seem to be
cashing in no dividends on their vir-
tues.
We see a woman who IS lazy, and
selfish and extravagant married to a
man who slaves himself to death to
gratify her every whim, bu. instead
Of doing flip flops of gratitude per-
petually before him, she yawns in his
face and complains because he is sc
absorbed in business that he doesn't
nave time to read the six best sellers
or keep up with the latest dancing
step, and do the society act.
And we see women who are married
to worthless loafers, to drunkards ano
FOUNDERS who nout them and disgrace
them and neglect them, and who
cling with a constancy eff devotion
that nothing can shake to these
worthless hulks of humanity.
And the Strangest part Of it all i:
: that the man who has got the wife
who never considers him, consider.
her more than any man ever does the
wife who makes a doormat of hersel
for him, and that the more e woman
has to forgive in husband, the NOR,
4 she seems to love him.
Why this is thus we do not know
L 1t merely is Perhaps it really is NOR,
blessed to give than to receive, AND
, that we feel peculiar tenderness to
l wards the weak and erring wife o.
l husband because she or he continual
| ly calls out what is best in us, SO tina
e in our souls we are continually suf
fused with a glow of self righteous
ness that keeps us warm and happy
Perhaps, after all, perpetual good
ness is inane. 1t is like continue
diet of mush and milk, good for u
f and perfectly wholesome, but tasteles
. | and apt to cloy on the palate, wherea
@ | wickedness is always more or less ex
. citing and injects some paprika int
6 the daily domestic menu.
A wife whose every move you cal
= forecast, who is absolutely sure to d
= exactly the wise and econ smical thin
= in any emergency and who can al
n | ways be relied upon to meet you witt
u a glad sweet smile is Cndoubtedl
| comfortable to live with. but she ha
y no thrills, whereas wife whose mex
e move kept you guessing and who wa
s lust as likely to act like d wild cat a
e a sucking dove might not make mat
: rimony a sane and safe proposition
but it would never be dull
And the same thing would hold tru
p of the wandering husband. the neg
lected wifes pathway may be streW
n with thorns, but she never has to com
| plain because she lives in a rut
@ Bernard Shaw explains. as well as
can-be explained, why the imported
: husband and wife are more cherishe
e than the model ones when in his pla
s of Getting Married" he makes tn
brother-in-law tell why they alway
- took the fascinating Mrs. George bac
/ after each of her excursions after re
! nance: You see. she was so inter
Il esting" he said. ''She had so man
I strange experiences.
Family life is monotonous, at bes
and it is our instructive effort to &c
!, away from this that makes US cheris
those who have a spice of the devil
them above those who are just all ur
e adulterated saint. This is the VIII.