Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1917-06-09
CHAPTER LV

!
1t is difficult to consider a person,
| his character and his actions, dis
| sociated from his surroundings and
possessions.
1 do not make this statement as
an excuse for my lack of decision,
but only as one of the reasons that
made me hesitate to give Brewster
Norton a decided answer.
To be sure, he had not asked for
| one. Yet perhaps. had 1 been
| strong minded individual, I would
have spoken a definite YES" or no"
! At the time l seemed absolutely in
capable of doing this.
| For a couple of miles over which
| he drove his car slowly, there was
complete silence on the part of my
companion and myself. l was trying
| to think sanely. AS was my habit
! lately, 1 rehearsed some of the
! things Brewster Norton had done
! for me. Yet I spent little time on
/ heart and life.
1 knew l liked this man; I knew
I was happy in his home. How
much of this happiness was due to
regard for him, and how much to
my enjoyment of the luXuries and
pleasures he provided? 1 could not
! tell. Then, above all these physical
|
ton 1 was deriving from my asso-
citation with Grace.
| 1 felt pride and joy in the color
| that had come to her pale cheeks,
( in the curves that had replaced the
angles, in her growth in body and
mind. l recalled what 1 had heard
of her mothers nervous organization
and what Grace had been before I
/ came to her. Did / have a right to
leave this little creature now?
l would have been a blind fool if
I had not appreciated that the lonely
| child loved me, that she turned to
me with all her joys and worries.
AS for myself l had become so fond
of her that l felt a construction of
! the heart at the possibility of leaving
her. How could l bear it? And this
question reared its ugly head-where
would l go? / had no home. 1t was
rot likely that l would get another
position like this one. Yet if / told
this man, sitting by me now, that l
would never marry him l must go
away at once.
4 Difficult Situation
oh" l exclaimed involuntarily, 81
| don't know what to do! l want to
do what is. .>right-to be honest and
aboveboard-.yet L cannot look at the
matter clearly"
We had reached a turn in the road
and before us lay the highway, white
! in the moonlight, leading toward
Hillcrest. Again my employer
stopped his car, drawing 1t up at
the side of the road.
! There is plenty of room for any
one TO pass now," he exclaimed. 1T
is not likely that another car will
come this way, but if one does / can
pretend to be busy looking at my
! tires
1 wondered at his forethought.
| My own heart was so full of tumult
that 1 had not given the chance
passer-by a fleeting thought. Yet
this man, whose heart was even
| fuller than mine, could take time for
such considerations. Perhaps that
one fact reminded me that he was a
j man of the world, experienced in
ways of which I knew nothing, and
years older than 1. Here was an
other thing to give me pause.
| Now" he said, leaning toward
me, but not attempting to take my
hand or touch me, talk it out, dear
child. What can you not look at
clearly?"
at any of it, / exclaimed, trying
to formulate my disordered ideas.
| First, you are years older than /
am. Wait"--as he attempted to
! speak-''now, while ! have the cotlr-
age, let me say TIC lSSb VI II. nave
never had such beautiful things as
you have given me; l have been
happy in your home; 1 am fond of
Tom; love Grace"
AS I uttered the child's name L
lump came in my throat and 1 swal-
lowed with difficulty. Cant you
see," went on, how all these things
blind me to what l ought to do? The
question is not as to whether / care
for them-but whether''-
1 stopped. whether you care for
me?" he supplemented gently. Nor
is that the question, dear, 1t Is
whether you can ever learn to care
enough for me to spend your life
with me. / understand all that you
have said. You feel that in refusing
me you are renouncing all these
things.
But remember that in accepting
me you make them yours forever I
am older than you, yes, and that
can't be helped; but forty-six is not
old in a man or in a woman, either
for that matter. Grace needs YOU
So does Tom. So do /. I am not
asking deep love-yet. But I want
to have the privilege of teaching you
to care for me-"
A Willing Risk
But" 1 faltered, sit may not be
just to you"
II will take that risk" he said,
abruptly. Remember that. Try to
kcare for me, and the rest will follow
And If you can't love me mucn-I
will be satisfied with such regard as
you can give me. Think Of 1t, DEAR"