The Washington herald., 1917-02-06

Out from the banquet hall at Rausch-
er's last night there came steady rap,
rap, rap. 1t was the hammers and anvils
of the knights of Momus, assembled for
its annual banquet and knock fest"
They knocked prodigiously and earnest
ly, devoting their attention. In the main,
to widely known gentlemen occupying
seats in the big-domed building down
Pennsylvania Avenue way, commonly
known as the Capitol But they didn't
knock any one behind his back. The VIC
tins were all present-oh, very much
PRESENT. Also they seemed to like it.
Have Two Rules.
It was the twentieth annual banquet OF
the Knights of Momus. an organization
better known. as the Knockers Club, .
and recruited from the allied printing
crafts of the City. There are just two
rules enforced at these celebrations: you
must not smoke opium in the elevator,
and you must bury your own dead" In
other words, don't get rough. There Is
one other little thing. Any member or
guest, regardless of sex or previous con-
dition of servitude, who attends is re-
quired to check his worry with his over
coat. Everybody there last highland
there were too many of them to count
did it.
Guests Not Lisetd.
No list of guests will be printed with
this account of the doings. Anyone in
terested is invited to look over the Con-
a dozen or so persons listed In that book
who were not present at the festivities.
But half a dozen Is a liberal estimate.
| Uncle Joe" Cannon, Representative
"Phfr' Campbell, of Kansas, "the man
Roosevelt couldn't lick and all the
other Congressional lights who have at
tended the KNOCKERS Club" banquets
year after year. were there again to see
themselves caricatured. and watch their
work burlesqued.
And they all admitted that they liked
It. For the caricaturing and burlesqueing
and knocking done at the Momus
sofrees is always gentle and good-natured.
1t never leaves a sting.
Program Is "FearfuI."
The entertainment program last night
which had been kept as carefully secret
by the committee in charge as the where
abouts of a German submarine-was
either a thing of beauty and a Joy for
ever, or something fearful and wonder
full to behold-aH according to the way
you looked at II. II covered Just about
everything from ragtime to esoterics.
Most of 1t, of course, was just sheer
nonsense-deliberately so. But there was
also a more serious part. There were,
for instance, some vocal revelations by
the Kaspar Quartet. Mrs. NJ. S. Bowie.
Miss Ritchie Mclean, J. F. Bowie and
J. E. Kinsella- with George Wilson at the
plano. OF course, George O'Connor was
there with some songs-and the phrase
was there" is used advisedly. Mrs.
Bowie and Miss Mclean both sang solos
In addition to the quartet selections; w.
S. Shelby gave recitations that made the
diners sit right up straight and listen
close, and Miss Agnes whelan sang.
The Scroll Is Read,
50 much for the more seriou. part.
The fun began to grow fast and furi-
Gus with the reading of the scroll. -
Said Scroll Is a creed covering the
latest preceding banquet of the
Knights. The keeper OF the scroll had
written a detailed description of every
one who played any prominent part IN
that gathering. Said descriptions. 1t was
explained, were written entirely accord
Ing to the mood of the keeper, and with
out the slightest regard for libel laws
After the 'scrolI' had been read. the
knights got busy with stunts" based in
the main on recent live issues before
Congress. Various knights carricatured
as many members Of Congress and pro
ceeded to hold mock sessions
The first OF these sessions was called
to consider the leak" Here is the way
the knights cleared up the scandal:
enter plumber, dropping monkey
wrench, overturning chair, and otherwise
audibly announcing his. presence.)
Toastmaster-Well, who are your
Plumber-Im the plumber, sir; a mem
ber Of Local No. 13.
Toastmaster-You make a noise like
one. But why do you come here and
make such a row?
Plumber-Excuse me, sfr, but I am
searching for the leak
Toastmaster-What sort Of a leakY
Plumber-Well, something very hard to
place-kind of dlplomatical, you know.
Toastmaster-Then why don't you try
the State Department?
Plumber-You can't get next to q leak
down there unless you are q banker or
a newspaper man.
administrative you been on Capitol
Hill?
Plumber-Yes. Heard there was 4 leak
around there, but
Toastmaster-Well, was theref
Plumber-No leak; no, sir; IT was an
explosion.
Toastmaster-Anybody hurt2
Plumber-Just some regulations dam
aged.
Toastmaster-Don't believe II. Never
heard of anybody on the Hill with a repu-
tation that could be hurt But. where
else have you been?
Plumber-At the printing ONCE.
Toastmaster-Any leaks there?
Plumber-Not likely. You see they 60,
SO many plumbers there that
Toastmaster-Stop right therei YoI