The Lakeland evening telegram., 1917-02-10
The Cure of
Joel White
By Nj. QUAD
Copyright. 1916. by the Mcclure
Newspaper Syndicate.

years old and had never seen a live
elephant. lion. tiger. bear or any
of the wild beasts kept in geological
gardens or carried around the country
by circus menageries.
Joel White bought butter. eggs. hides.
potatoes and other things of farmers |
and shipped them to New York. He |
was known as quiet. honest man and |
had the respect of all. He had been |
In business i've years when the time
came that he had to go to New York
city. When there he went to the zoo.
The place was n great surprise to him.
He was fascinated. Instead of making
a visit lasting two or three hours, he
spent the best part of three days look
Ing at the beasts and birds. and then
could hardly drag himself away. When
he reached home he could talk of moth
Ing else to his family. and he had a
certain wildness of eye which his wife
did not like at all. However. he went
TO bed at the usual time and slept
quietly through the night.
When Joel arose next morning and
sat down to breakfast he looked at the
food placed before him with great con
tempt and said 10 his wifei
This is no food for lion. Go down
TO the butcher shop and bring me five
pounds of raw meat
( Why, what do you mean, JoelT' she
4 asked In astonishment.
/ II mean that am full grown lion
and that shall kill half dozen per-
sons during the day"
The wife ran out and got three or
four men. and when they entered Joel
retreated TO the back yard and there
\ roared aud snarled and paved the
earth like nn angry lion. Two doctors
came and examined him. and the yer.
diet was that he had gone temporari
~ insane The man-lion was guarded
AT day and night and next morning
looked ana acted as sane as anybody
He did not remember that he had play
ell the lion. and the doctors said thai
no one must tell him. lie went e
business ANA for three days was al
riaht Tlen he awoke to declare tina
he wae nm elephant The attack came
upon him Just as he had left his gait
behind l.ll IL - 10 n store. He begal
sWineiH his risat arm as an elephan
. swings lis trunk. and he sent fort
trumpet blasts
,loel's elelhantne fit lasted two day
> and thea suddenly left him He pickle
up his business at just the point wher
A he left II and did not seem TO realiz
that he had lost any time Then h
/ began to perform" again, and hi
r "performance" created sudden an
= great shock.
!. Joel White was member of one {
n the churches and was always In HI
q pew of Sunday He was there o
/. this particular Sunday. and be was
Q close listener TO the sermon. Whe
!, 1t was about half done Joel sudden'
!. sprang to his feet and yelled out:
# Look out for me. ] have turne
q into "A rhinoccros.'
n With this he began running up al
| down the aisle The people rose U
! and hurried out as fast as they coul
j but he bumped against full SEQ
ami sent them sprawling.
n The doctors were very doubtful
, he would recover from this last i'll
n. sion For two days he remained sull'
a. | and silent and did not seem to recu
"A nize even his wife. Then he awoke.
| ~ ~tg .t,.
: When Joel came to himself again
10 was plainly told Of his past perfor
a ances He was utterly astonisht
~ Those things were blank to him, a
r he wept over them So great was
N earnestness that ii was agreed to ri
m him a last chance. If he played z
y on that town any more he must
10 shipped OFF to the state asylum.
,a One morning Joel was mailing up
,f box in front OF his store. As he VOL
20 ed away at the box he suddenly en-
Il ted a sound between hiss and
A. cackle. and throwing away the ha
ar mer and nails, he cried out:
tom. | have been turned into
=, ostrich And don't let them pluck {
h. my feathers"
i, With that speech he went runni
i up the street with long strides. a
q, the town was soon In an excited sti
~ again Joel hadn't committed any da
- age when he came across a tin ~
y. dler's rig which WIS standing In fr'
o. of a house, and the peddler hirns
~. had Just come out of the gate aftel
1a call.
,se Look out, Look out.' cried Joel
i'm he came striding up. Il have bt
turned into a ostrich, and IL kick
.d once | shall break all your ribs.'
- Look out yourself" shouted
of peddIer. II am an ostrich myself.
,ra If there is any kicking to be done
10 bet your boots ! shall have a ha
.ry In it,
~ Joel made an awful kick at him,
~ missed. and in return was fairly tu
II ed around by the shoe which STIR