Douglas Island news., 1917-08-10
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for him Co keep up with his corrcs- poudcucc than it was in the sap rising period or former days with Che result that Of late unanswered letters have been piling up on him until Che department known us 'm- formation Sought" is crowded Go oycrHuwiur and Che only thing Go bc done is Co answer a number ot thc most urgent appeals or take down his sign and retire as Che most authentic and prolific source of iu- formation north of latitude 53. Realizing that tho latter course would work hardship on many mon and twicc as many women, hc win cudcayor Co pull himself to- rcthcr and dispose of % few ot the most urgent appeals now confront mr him. Here arc some samples of what for years has kept the Stroller awake many nights when .hc rest of Che world was sleeping and much of it sleeping sufficiently loud as Co bc heard iu thc next block.
 YaMmu. Wash. Aug. !.
 Recently | cultivated a red one and while In that condition made violent love to grass widow with six. As Che jag faded. my ardor eyarou.rd It was regular race between them. but thc ardor won out being ull gone by Che time the ias had reached thc dark brown taste stage. But had committed myself and Che widow wants me Go come across She wants mo Co mar ry her and then go Co war and get killed s0 she can wear black She says she looks better In black than u anything else. but that cousId- ormr .Hc manner iu which she lost Reuben tied can Co him and turned him 0dr.ft- she was not jus uGcd in wearing black ! anu knock uscI and only weigh llS after a bath and uU army win have me. and If ] marry Arubclla ! certainly want to ru Co tbc war. What am Go doe Answer quickly. as Che situo- lion ia ut high tension
 Shorty. Box 3g.
 Tho mistake you made was iu getting sober and allowing your or- dor to coul Better como North and annex yourself Go some out-ol-thc- way uuucry Better sill come North and annex yourself Co a tribe ol Indians. as lots of others have done. are doing and win continue to do. You cam give Che home folks that olI spell about being a mis- siouary
 Uookvorm. Georgia. July 2g.
 s1h, My nerves have gone back ou me- hayc missed Che three last mrecw ! shot at 10 may bc my r..irHt but anyway. ! missed 'cm. Tho result is that my stoudus both m rc Democratic party and Che Methodist church is somewhat inn paired What can do Go regain my ug#uec'
 Colonel Uourbou.
 Tr1dc yo' rcyolyah fo' a shotgun Colonel. and saw oG thc bahL You w. g,fme old. that's au. Know. mr you as Che Stroller does. hc is laath Co believe there is anything wrong with your nerve.
 Juneau August s.
 Who was tbo author of thc song. "papos Pants win Soon Fit Wuuce" Glen Bartlett
 10 was some housewife. but tbc Stroller has forgotten her uamc. He knows it was neither Barbara Frit- ac nor Julia Ward Howe. Ask Ed Russell.
 Miss Minnie Gigglc, ot Douglas. wants Co know why che wind is ol- ways blowing iu moving pictures. and a Trcadwcllitc who signs his name Gabriel asks ir Che Stroller has any eligible ladies on the woit- ms list of his matrimonial bureau.
 TO Miss Minnie -"Thc wind blow cth where it lstcth."
 T0 Gabriel Yes.
 Juneau. August 9.
 AIy home is saudwichcd in be-