davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1917-08-02
Habits of Authors.

/ was presented once to lady who
Immediately fixed me with an eager
eye.
II am making a study Of the habits
Of authors" she announced. Here q
dreadful sinking Of the heart assailed
mel Kindly tell me at what hour
you retire."
Usually at half past TO-" / answer
ed wretchediy.
At that, as l had expected, her eye
brows went up. THE author Of When
All Was Dark" she Informed me. "sies
up all night. She says she cannot
sleep until she has savored the dawn"
However, she was kind enough to give
me another chance. "What do you
eat" she asked.
Three hearty meals a day." 1 an
swered.
Not breakfastw she pleaded. "Why,
st. George Dreamer never takes more
than three dEops of brandy on a lump
Of sugar in the morning. Just the
sight Of a coffee cup will upset his
work for week"
And then she left me, sure, I do not
doubt, that no real author could con-
fess to such distressingly normal hab,
its as mine.--Atlantc.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1917-08-02
The -
Scrap Book
Pooled Ihaeksray.

Thackeray did not know the mean
ing of G. r. o. general postofice). In
his Irish Sketch Book" this ignorance
led to one Of the biggest "bloomers' in
literary history.
During the novelist's Irish tour he
was constantly encountering pillar box
es labeled sc. p. O." He inquired the
meaning. and somebody pulled his leg.
He went home and wrote as follows:
$50 blind and extravagant is the de-
votion Of the people to the great dema-
gogue that they have actually erected
along the highways pillar stones with
the inscription G. P. o. which means
God Preserve O'Connell.'
The error was discovered in the Lon
don printing Office and Thackeray pre-.
served from a mistake which would
have raised laugh that would have
rung round the world.-westminster
Gazette.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1917-08-02
APPLE ESTIMATES

Provided the apples of the coming
fall crop can be distributed normally,
that is, provided the car facilities for
the transportation of them will be fur
nished shipping agencies at the desired
time. the tonnage of 1917 should be
moved at most advantageous returns
for growers. At least all things indi-
cate such result. The Bureau of
Crop estimates of the United States
Department of Agriculture has Just
issued a bulletin on crops, which indi.
Gates yield slightly in excess of that
of last season. We have nearly always
found these preharvest estimates sub.
ject to a meterial discount, and we
predict that as the fruit nears the
picking time the government report
will shrink. A feature of this season. s
bulletin is encouraging to the grower
of commercial fruit district. While
some of the larger shipping sections
show heavier yield than last year,
the increase for the most part takes
place in districts that produce only a
barnyard grade of apple and thus that
do not figure in the general fruit
marketing.
A further encouraging condition for
the apple grower prevails in the
banana situation. The great need for
transatlantic shipping is leading to
the communicating of bottoms used in
the banana importation, and smaller
stocks of this universally used fruit
may be expected. The orange crop,
it is said, is far below normal yield. 1t
is up to the Hood River grower to
spray to kill the codling moth and
pray for plenty of cars.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1917-08-02
Nickel In Soapmakina.

II will probably be news to the aver
age ablutionist that the metal nickel
Is used in making his soap. And fur.
ther, perhaps. he will be glad to learn
that although the nickel, finely ground.
is mixed with the other soap ingredi-
ents the finished product contains
none of it. This is SO because the
nickel acts as what the chemists call
a catalyst-that Is, its presence causes
certain desirable changes to occur. al
though 1t takes no part in the chemi-
cal reaction. Offensive oils and those
too thin for satisfactory use when
mixed with finely divided nickel and
subjected to the action Of current
of hydrogen become deodorized and
harder and suitable for the soapmak-
er's use. Cottonseed oil, for example,
after the nickel-hydrogen treatment,
makes satisfactory soap.-Pittsburgh
Press.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1917-08-02
An Odd Experiment.

A strange and amusing experiment
IL described by q. Hugo In the Elec-
trical Experimenter as follows:
Place a copper coin on a silver coin.
The former should be at least three
sixteenth inch smaller all around than
the latter. A cent and half dollar
will do; an English halfpenny and
silver dollar will do better, because
they, are larger. On the copper coin
place an ordinary earthworm and
watch 1t try to crawl Of. 1t cannot do
1t, for the instant its damp body,
which Is In contact with the copper,
touches the silver 1t starts current
of electricity that gives 1t shock.
The shock makes the worm recoiL 1t
tries again, but each time its head
touches the silver It gets the shock
and soon finds It Is more comfortable
to stay on the copper coin.
OF course the current thus produced
is very slisAt, but It Is quite enough
Cor the wo0n
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1917-08-02

Here is a story concerning Nat Good
win and former spouse which served
to amuse a party Of friends at the
time. The Goodwins at that time pos
sessed a fine country home on the
banks Of the Thames river, near New
London, Conn. Every summer they
used to invite some Of their Thespian
friends to join their house party. On
one such occasion Mrs. Goodwin de-
livered a bonmot which is worth re-
peating.
Mrs. Goodwin" said some one. "you
certainly have fine place here. Just
think Of it--a lawn right on the riverT'
YES" was the reply, "it's fine. In
the spring we have the lawn on the
river, and in the fall we have the river
ON the lawn." Boston Record.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1917-08-02
Settled II.

In Illinois there is an old law on the
statute books to the effect that In Grim
inal cases the jury is Judge of the law
as well as Of the facts" Though not
often quoted. once in awhile a lawyer
with desperate case makes use of it.
In one case the Judge instructed the
jury that it was to judge Of the law as
well as the facts. but added that it was
not to Judge the law unless 1t was
fully satisfied that it knew more law
than the Judge. An outrageous verdict
was brought in, contrary to all instruc-
tions Of the court, who felt called upon
to rebuke the jury. At last one old
farmer arose.
"Jedge," said he, weren't We to
jedge the law as well as the factsT'
Certainly" was the response But
I told you not to judge the law unless
you were clearly satisfied that you
knew the law better than did"
well, jedge," answered the farmer
as he shifted his Quid. Eve considered
that pint."-Chioago News.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1917-08-02
Miss Huxley in Pageant

Miss Mildred Huxley rivaled movie
star in the way she played her part in
pageant on July 4 at Atascadero,
CAL, where she is now making her
home. The affair was a spectacular
performance dramatising "The His
tory of California" in which about
1000 people took part. Miss Mildred
took the part the of an Indian maiden
and in her elaborately beaded costume
of deer skin made the hit of the day
when she descended hill on a feroci-
ous cayuse and raced past the stadium
in pursuit of the Indians. She had a
leading part, portraying the part of
Isabel.
Miss Huxley is a niece of Attorney
and Mrs. E. H. Hartwig.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1917-08-02

Twelfth Company has gone. We
miss our boys. The town is an alto
gether different place since they left.
We miss their youthful spontaneity,
their energy in business and on ranch,
the cheerful smile of their greeting.
A large number of the boys gave up
places of responsibility, positions that
they or those dependent on them can
ill afford to relinquish. These places
should be held for the boys until their
return, no matter how long they may
be away-the places they left or bet
ter ones. We of Hood River want to
keep this thought alive.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1917-08-02

For US of the Hood River Valley the
great day has come. We are on the
eve of the actual construction work of
the last laps of the Columbia Highway
between here and the paved end of the
road at Cascade Locks. The road will
soon be graded and then will follow
the paving. 1t is a time that we
should recall the names of S. Benson
and Samuel Hill and we should all re-
ioice.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1917-08-02

Military drills should not be lacking
in Hood River because Twelfth Com
pany men have gone. The special
deputy sheriffs recently sworn in by
Sheriff Johnson ought to be organized
along military lines. The men should
drill regularly and thus accustomed to
strict discipline they will be able to
handle with a minimum of trouble any
labor disturbances that we may have.
A well disciplined home guard would
go far toward preventing labor difficult
ties when apple harvest time rolls
around.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1917-08-02

The Northwestern apple growers
have answered the call of the Presi-
dent, who said, "The- railways are the
arteries of the nations life, and upon
their employees rests the immense re-
sponsibility of moving the products of
the nation promptly and properly, "and
with the minimum load of fruits in
creased materially, each refrigerator
car will be forced the coming fall and
winter to render a miximum of service.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1917-08-02

Some clever advertising man ought
to read carefully the recent leading
acrticle in Better Fruit, the same hav-
ing been prepared after exhaustive
study by that publications. editor,
E. H. Shepard, and prepare from its
suggestions a slogan that should be
sounded often, and with the pep
that punchy slogans arouse, into the
ears of apple marketing men. Mr..
Shepard's article points conclusively
to the fact that one of the ills of the
apple game is lack of distribution.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1917-08-02
Takinq No Chances.

Senator JEFF Davis of Arkansas tells
this one on himself:
II had an appointment to speak at a
town in eastern Arkansas on Satur.
day, and l arrived on a late train the
night before, carrying nothing but a
small hand grip. There was no one on
duty at the hour except the night por-
ter, and he was acting as porter, clerk
and general overseer. registered, and
he showed me to room. But In a
few minutes he came back and said:
BOSS, my 'struction is. when a gem.
man haven't any baggage. to collect in
advance
"'Why, I've got baggage l replied,
pointing to the little grip.
81 know, sir, boss he said, but
you've stayed too long on that al
ready New York Globe.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1917-08-02
CHERRIES SELL AT
RECORD HIGH PRICE

The Apple Growers Association yes
terday received news from New York
that the last of the six cars of cherries
shipped by the concern for the season
had lust sold on the auction at prices
ranging from $l.65 to So per box, ac-
cording to size. The carload sold for
a total of $3,444, a record mark for
Hood River cherries. The cherr les
were of the Lambert variety.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1917-08-02
What Interested He~,

DR.. Anna Howard Shaw, discussing
the divorce evil, on one occasion said :;
"Love is the best foundation for mar
hage, of course But common sense
keeps it cool, and cool things, Of
course, keep the best. But selfishness
kills all-and some married people are
as selfish as the lady to whom the palm
list said, These lines. alas, tell me that
you are destined to wear widows
weeds oh, dear mel said the lady.
For how l0ngT"
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1917-08-02
Real Estate Transfers

j. M. Culbertson, W. c. Curtis,
Richard Woodland and wife, Alexander
Sim and wife, S. w. Curran and wife,
Matt johnson and wife and NJ. Oster-
gard and wife, Columbia River High
way rights of way.
Homestead Orchard Co. to r. ms
niger, small tract on Mosier range.
Mr.. and Mrs. F. Eggert to Thomas
E. Avery and wife, 20 acres on East
Side.
Percy E. Wells and wife and Ralph
Dennison, right of way to Pacific Pow
er & Light Co. on East Side.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1917-08-02
Elsphant Skin.

Elephant skin is beautiful and dura.
BILE, but it is very hard to get. The
price Of a live elephant is large, and q
leather manufacturer who promised to
provide a number Of elephant skin
bags at short order would find him.
self facing big problem. Almost all
elephants, after they die, fall into the
hands Of the leather manufacturers, or
else they are stuffed and put in mu-
Spums
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1917-08-02
POLK DIRECTORY
MAN LEAVES TODAY

W. H. Weber, who has been here Sc
curing data for the r. L. Polk direc-
tory of Hood River, Wasco and Sher.
man counties, will return to Portland
this evening. All who wish to get in
touch with Mr.. Weber to place orders
for the valuable publication, soon to
be off the press, should telephone him
at number 2524.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1917-08-02
Roman Rulers,

Three Of the greatest rulers Rome
ever had were Spanish born-Trajan,
Hadrian and Marcus Anrelius. Later
occupants Of the CaeRrian throne born
in Iberia were Theodosius and Homo
rius. Seneca, Martial and Quintilian,
famous In Roman letters, also were
Spaniards.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1917-08-02
Subscription. S1.50 Per Year.

Except IL pertain to live news matter com
munica.ions, or articles OF general nature,
their appearing In the issue the current week
When subscribers desire a change In address
fhis office should be notified promptly, and a
week before If possible. Always give old ad-
dress as well as the new. Also, Hood River
subscribers should notify this office at once
when changing their address from one rural
route TO another, or from city delivery 10
country delivery, or vice versa. II You do not
get your paper promptly, notify us by mail or
telephone and the matter will be Investigated
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1917-08-02
Pinch Hitter In a Pinch.

Ftncn r1ltter IN Fincn.
From section Of the big city where
they hit em over the ear just to see
'em fall" according to a local ball
player with minor league experience,
resident Of that excitement prOduc-
Ing neighborhood wrote to the man.
ager Of small league team for job
in the outfield. Contrary to custom
he did not 60 at length into a descrip-
ton Of his talents, but merely stated
that he was qualified to hold a posi-
ton.
This undue modesty, coupled with
the fact that the manager really was
in need Of an outfielder, prompted the
boss Of the team to wire back:
Can use you if you can hit"
Later in the day he decided that he
would give the candidate trial, at any
rate, and wired:
Join team here We will refund
your transportation"
The two kilograms apparently reach
ed the young ball player at about the
same time, for the manager received
the following reply to both messages:
Can hit pill, but can't raise dough"
The outfielder was wired transporta-
tion.-Louisville Times.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1917-08-02
Notice OF Unpaid Warrants.

Hood River, oregon,
July 23 1917.
State OF oregon, go
County of Hood River, Ss'
In accordance with Section No. 2S99, /. o. H.,
notice is hereby given that the following
listed warrants which were issued more than
seven years prior to the first day of July, 1917
and which have not been paid, that II said
warrants are not presented for payment on or
before the first day of September. 1917, they
will be cancelled and payment thereof will be
reused
No. 225. Dec. 9, 1908, Everett Edgerton, 81. 80.
No. 2S7, Dec. g. 1905, ]. C. Williams, Si.50.
No. $50, March 4, 1909, W. A. Johnson 100
No. 6sS, Oct 8, 1909, Hazel Keller, s. 50.
No. 7T3, Oct. G, 1909, q. W. Stafford, 81 40
No. 93l, Feb, s, 1910 W. M Thompson, 81 10.
No. 932, Feb. \. 1910, A. II. McKeon, So 10.
KENT SHOEMAKER, County Clerk.
az II. M. FRANCIS, Deputy.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1917-08-02
Those Who Fail,

"All honor to him who shall win the
prize!"
The world has cried for q thousand
years,
But to him who tries and who fails and
dies
give great honor and glory and tears
Give glory and honor and pitiful tears
To all who fail In their deeds sublime
Their ghosts are many in the van of
years.
They were born with time in advance
Oh, great is the hero who wins q name,
But greater many and many a time
Some pale faced fellow who dies In shame
And let's God finish the thought SUBJ
lime.
And great is the man with a sword un-
drawn,
And good is the man who refrains from
wine.
But the man who fails and yet still fights
on
Lo. he is the twin born brother Of mine!
Joaquin Miller,
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1917-08-02
Few Paupsrs In Japan.

There are few paupers In Japan.
Everybody works, and 1t is considered
disgrace to be supported by your
relatives while you have the ability to
earn your own living.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1917-08-02
aeIie of 6arbaritv

Balls placed on the top Of gateposts
are survival Of the barbaric practice
of our f0refathers. who hung over
their gates the heads Of their enemies
killed I'm combat.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1917-08-02
A Psssimist.

PA, what is a pessimistT
"A pessimist Is q man. my boy. who
can't enjoy fne weather because he
knows It isn't going to last"-Detroit
Free Press.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1917-08-02
WEST BOUND

No. IL. Soo-Spokane-P Portland 6 100 q. m.
No. 10, Port. P. s. Exp.,........s:54a a. m.
No. /, Portland Local. 2 40 D. m.
No. IL, Ore. & Wash. Limited 4 AS p. m.
EAST BOUND
No. 6, Salt Lake Express. IL 10 a. m
No. 2, Pendleton Local.. ..........10 80 a. m
No. Is, Ore. & Wash. Ltd. ...I2:1O p. m
No. IL, Spokane-Port. Pass. S:46 D. m
No. 4, Portland-Puget Sound 9:O6 p. m
]. H. FREDRICY. Agent,
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1917-08-02
MISCELLANEOUS

Lost-Hub cap 10 auto truck, between top of
East Side grade and the Sunday ranch. Find
er please phone Walter Forty, 57O9. az
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1917-08-02

For Butter Labels printed in accord
ance with Dairy and Food Laws, call at
this office.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1917-08-02
FINS, FURS AND FEATHERS

Hood river and Herman creek, both
in this county, have been declared
spawning streams for the propagation
of salmon by the State Game and Fish
Commission, and all fishing, except
angling with rod and line, will be pro-
hibited. The Commission has also
posted Eagle creek. lying partly in
Hood River and partly in Multnomah
county, which will be maintained as a
spawning stream.
Deputy Game Warden w. o. Hadley,
of The Dalles, was here Saturday to
file the formal papers of closing the
streams at the Office of the county
clerk.
A peculiar result followed an after
noon of fishing by the following local
men Sunday afternoon: DR.. j. M.
Waugh. Judge Derby, H. H. Larkin.
E. j. Middleswart and j. H. Fredricy.
When the men returned to their rem
devious it was discovered that each
had an even dozen trout. The creels
of Messrs. Fredricy, Derby, Middle
swart and Waugh were identical.
When Mr.. Fredricy investigated his
fish basket on arriving home he found
it was not his own. He motored at
once to the home of Judge Derby,
thinking it was the latter's basket.
DR.. Waugh. however, had switched his
basket with Mr.. Fredricy. Instead of
taking it to the owner, however, he
had hurried to the Middleswart home.
The men journeyed to the West Fork.
where the fish were caught, in Mr..
Fredricy's Dodge.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1917-08-02

Says dispatch from Helena. Mont. ::
The far-famed Fallon county jackass
has been matched. When assessments
came in last year, Fallon county was
found to contain only one jackass.
Assessment lists returned last week
from Sheridan county show that, while
the county contains 1000 sheep and
1000 lambs have been dropped this
year, there is only one ram in the
county. Assessors have named the
ram king Solomon.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1917-08-02

Self respect Is the cornerstone Ct oil
vtYsue. e.-Hefschei.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1917-08-02

Large fleas have smaller fleas upon
their backs to bite 'em
Smaller fleas have lesser fieas, and so
on ad infinitum.
When Geo. H. Lynn returned Satur-
day evening from fishing trip and
was cleaning his mess of fine trout, he
found in one of them, II inch trout,
a seven inch trout that the bigger fish
had swallowed. Stomach fluids were
just bringing about the digestion of
the smaller fish, and its skin was dis
integratlng.
Out of curiosity, Mr.. Lynn opened
the stomach of the smaller fish and
there he discovered the remains of two
still smaller fry that the rapacious
trout, now victim itself, had made
victims of.
DR.. ]. M. Waugh and family returned
the later part of last week from fish
ing and camping trip on the Mckenzie
river. DR.. Waugh reports that the
fishing was fine.
r. P. Bonham, H. B. Hazard and c.
r. Bean, of Portland, returned last
week from fishing and camping trip
on Lost Lake.
Mr.. and Mrs. ]. A. Epping and son,
Stanley, and Mr.. and Mrs. c. H. Slet-
ton and son, Paul, were recent visitors
at Camp Overall on the West Fork.
Ray lmbler and family have just re.
turned from an outing on Lake Branch.
Mr.. lmbler reports the fishing excel
lent.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1917-08-02
FOR SALE

For Sale-A IL 10 ten ounce tent and poles,
almost new. W. u. Webers Harness shop.
Tel. 25A. a9
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1917-08-02

For Sale-Two cows, one fresh In August
and other in October. Both fine stock. Tel
64ll early morning or evening. a9
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1917-08-02
FOR RENT

For Rent-Nne room house, partially FUR
nished, close In Furnace, garden, garage.
Immediate possession. 6l0 Oak ST, Phone
2463. as
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1917-08-02

KEMP LODGE, No. lSl, /. o. q. F.-M eets in
odell odd Fellows hall every SAT ur
day night. Visitors cordially welcomed
W. II. Ehrck, n. q.
John Duck wall, VIC.
ID. 5. Coughey, Sec'y; w. II. Bucher, Treas.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1917-08-02

W.AUNA TEMPLE PYTHIAN SISTERS NOS
Meets the second and fourth Thursdays OF
each month at X. of P hall
Mrs Gertrude Stranahan, F.. C.
MRS. May Nogel, NJ. of r. and C.
Mrs. Margaret Howell, M. off.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1917-08-02

For Sale-Two good milcb cows, one Guern
sey and Jersey, the other Holstein and polled
Durham, both now fresh. Address, d. c.
Chambers, Hood River, Or, or call at li0s l3t
Street. a9
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1917-08-02

r. P. Bonham, H. B. Hazard and c.
r. Bean, of Portland, returned last
week from fishing and camping trip
on Lost Lake.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1917-08-02

Ray Imbler and family have Just re.
turned from an outing on Lake Branch.
Mr.. lmbler reports the fishing excel
lent.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1917-08-02

TOT saie-A feed and hay cutter, 20 ton co
pacity GOOD as new. Only run about tue
months. Will take 25 per cent less than Gov, sso
Also one new Mandt wagon bed. stsnSord
size Cost s3l, will sell for SIS. ]. i. Thomn
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1917-08-02

Wanted Girl for general homework. Phon,
5i37. 40
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1917-08-02
WANTED

Wanted-A married man for general ,
chard work. F. A. Massee, Tel. Odell lIB q
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1917-08-02

HOOD RIVER CIRCLE NO. 524, WOMEN of
Woodcraft-M at X. of z. hall on the
nrst and Third Thursdays of each month.
Mrs. Cora Blagg, G. N.
Mrs. Matte Nickelsen, Clerk.