The Meridian times. (Meridian, Idaho) 1909-1938, 1917-11-16


AS the days go on critical appro-
priation from the family committee on
interference may grow harder and
harder to bear. 1t is depressing to live
under the microscope of criticism, like
an impaled insect. There is often con-
demnation where, if the full facts were
known, there would be only praise.
There is altogether too much judging
in the world, too much idle intrusive
censorship of the acts of others. 1t Is
uncomfortable to hear constantly that
you ought to do this" or you should
certainly do that" 1t is so easy to
solve the conundrums of another's
life.
The reason that advice is usually of
little value is that it is not based on
a perfect knowledge of the inffnity of
detail that makes up condition. Per-
feet advice should fit the situation as
a glove fits the hand; most advice
does not get much nearer than a box
ing glove in the matter of fitting.
That the family interference may
arise from genuine interest does not
excuse it nor even explain it; where
love is greatest it should be most ten
der and most considerable. There are
times when some tiny flame of misun-
derstanding arises between husband
and wife that a breath of kindly in
depreciation might blow into nothing
ness, but, talked over by the family
and canvassed and debated and in
| tensified, grows into confagration.
Under the gossip, often unthinking
Of it's evil influence, a tiny molehiu of
| difficulty may become an almost impas-
| sable Rocky Mountain range. Oil is
a good thing to pour on troubled wa
tiers but it is poor to put out fire.
A difficulty that originally concerned
only a duet now has been made to af-
feet the whole family choir. 1t is cas-
| Ter for two people to reach loving har-
mony than to distribute it among a
| dozen.
Sometimes the interference of fam
lilies becomes even more active and
aggressive than this, and because of a
fancied grievance or a genuine oppo-
sition it actually comes between hus-
band and wife and by harsh criticism
or condemnation seeks to incite strife
and discord between them. Here in
slant loyalty of the one to the other
should assert itself and refuse TO listen
to the voice. In an instructive spirit
of protection there should be a calm
dignified protest against the recital
of what if unessential should never
be spoken, and if of serious impor
should be heard only in the presence
of the one thus charged with VIVA
he or she should have the opportunit!
of denying or disproving instantly, be
fore the weeds of suspicion have time
to root themselves in the heart OF
the other.
In many homes, there is some one
in the family, on either side, whose
visits bring a trail of sadness, sorrow
protest, bitter opposition, an unneces
sary and unwarrantable intrusion OF
discordant element tending to worry
irritate and perhaps even to bring into
inharmony husband and wife. In this
delicate situation it often seems a prob,
lem how best to act The health and
happiness of the home must be consid,
cred as of first and greatest impor
lance. If it be but a trivial inconven.
fence or jar to the domestic serenity
the wisdom of tolerance for a time
should be manifested.
If it be of more serious menace, i'm
possible to master by patient bearing
the privilege of hospitality should MOI
be strained beyond the bearing point
There is a moment when sacrifice
ceases to be a virtue and degenerateS
into cowardice, vice. There may be al
injustice to oneself and to one neal
and dear that this unwelcome guest
hood outrages. 1t is not true hospital
ity to mask the hearts continued pro
J test under a smile, to submit unneces
sarily to an atmosphere that saps onet
: mental and moral vitality, that dull!
energy, deadens ones finer sensibility
and kills the joy of life, leaving on
worried, weak, worn and weary, unabl,
: to meet as one should the questions o
, everyday living.
If we constantly suffer injustice tina
we can remove, we are slaves to tn
individuality of another and coward
to our own. The ranking Irritation
of the unjust bearing, if continued, viii
7 permeate our whole nature, like al
5 emotional poison. We should therefor
: act calmly, wisely. with kindness AM
9 dignity, and frankly recognize condi
{ lions and with perfect fairness tax
the gentlest action that will remed
: them. Better a short, decisive battl
] fought to finish than a constant Sc
a ries of petty squabbles and skirmisheS
q We cannot be just to others if we ar
j unjust to ourselves. If one lives eve
: under the scepter of the decision o
$ others, it is not free life-it is slavery
5 One cannot keep emotion constant
+ corked up; some time that cork vii
y come out-perhaps inopportunely
g True love, true companionship, tru
: living, can reign in the home only a
n there is in the home an atmosphere O