The Owosso times. (Owosso, Mich.) 1897-1926, 1917-09-14
My Hypothetical
Wife
A Story of Preparation
For War

| While driving through the country
came upon house situated in yard
filed with shrubs and flowers In which
a sign was hung. as follows: "SchOol
of MatrimOny."
school of Matrimonyw repeated
to myself. surely there is something
interesting behind that sign. I will
go in and see what it is"
I found a middle aged, intellectual
looking man, who introduced me to his
wife, comely woman, who excused
herself, leaving me alone with her hus-
band. Before quitting the room she
spoke q few words to him, and 1 no.
ticed that, though what she had to say
was of ordinary character, there was
something in her tone and manner
that denoted a deep affection for him.
Seeing your sign, sir" said to the
gentleman-Mr. Larramore was his
name-"I have called to learn what it
means"
"Are you meditating matrimony?" he
asked.
'Well, yes. Every man meditates
matrimOny except those who are mar
ried, and many of those mediate di-
vorce."
ut is that divorced mean divorce
between couples with no well founded
reason for separation-which my wife
and undertake to prevent by educat-
ing those about to be married in the
dangers which they are sure to en-
counter during the early days Of wed
ded life."
Twill you state your educational
plan?" l asked.
Certainly; there is nothing secret
in it. BY attending divorce court pro-
ceedings my wife and / have collected
large number of reasons why cou-
pies drift into what is commonly called
incompatibility. On these reasons or
incidents we have constructed tables
showing that the greatest number OF
breaks which occur between two nor
NAL, well intending married persons
take. place within three years after
marriage. From that time they dimin-
ish rapidly. The most difficult period
for them to get over is from the third
to the tenth month Of welded life. We
instruct our pupils in the dangers they
are liable to meet during these critical
months. Those which follow are but
a repetition of those that have been
incurred before. Those who know the
perils they are to meet have far bet
tePchHfce Of fesistihg them tiiAri those
Who imYeet fhsfY sRNkOdt' having FBeen
prepared for them" - 6T
do your courses consist simply Of
verbal instruction, or do your pupils
receive practical Instruction.
1--WE deliver lectures, / to men, my
wife to women, but we have a co-edu-
cative course wherein couples hypo-
thetically married are carried through
most quarrels. During the quarrels
they use their own judgment as to
wherein either one or the other is in
error, the Instructor correcting them
from time to time, pointing out the
dangers Of certain acts during trying
moments or suggesting methods liable
to bring about immediate reconcilia-
ton"
II think" / broke in at this part.
that I will enter myself in your acad-
envy as a student on the co-education
PLAN"
Having been accepted as pupil, /
paid my tuition fee, and after attend
ing the lectures for a couple Of weeks
Mr.. Larramore showed me a number Of
photographs Of young ladies from
whom / might select a dummy wife. I
pounced upon a pretty girl whose APP
pearance denoted amiability and APP
piled for her. 1t happened that she
was not engaged 1 was introduced to
was handed a printed slip which read
as follows:
"My dear, when married you ] sup
posed I was marrying you alone. I
had no intention Of marrying your
family"
1 was instructed by Mr.. Larramore
to speak these words angrily to my
dummy wife. / did so, and despite the
fact that 1 was playing a part I saw
the hot blood mount to her cheek. She
made no reply, for the instructor inter-
posed.
"Those words should not have been
uttered" he said, though they may
have been felt. When a man marries
a woman, In a sense he marries her
family-that Is to say, he cannot ig-
more them. Whatever Is near and dear
to her must be treated with considera-
ton by him. II some old maiden aunt
addresses him on first meeting him by
his first name he may writhe within,
but outwardly he should act as IL the
lady and he had been brought up as
near relations"
"Hm!" I remarked. "Are my wife's
relatives one Of the dangers of matri-
mony?'
zone Of the principal Ones" replied
our teacher.
II would have you to understand"
replied my hypothetical wife, that my
family is as good as yours and. I've no
doubt, better"
This was not down I'm the course of
instruction end somewhat ratified me.
But Mr.. Larramore took advantage of
1t to get in some excellent points on the
subject of marital relatives and how
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