Five Mile Beach weekly journal., 1917-03-09
The Elevator Boy
By M. QUAD
Copyright, 1916, by the Mcclure
Newspaper Syndicate.

talk plainly to the boys who have just
entered upon the noble work of ele.
waiting elevators.
If you have been selected to conduct
a wire cage up and down, no matter
whether in a skyscraper or an apart
ment house, the first thing to be done
is to ask yourself these questions:
Am | a modest, unassuming boyT"
as my position going to make me a
conceited young jackass?"
Twill l keep my mouth shut and let
others do the talking?"
"Have l the proper respect for old
age?"
Having answered these questions sat
isfactorily to yourself. you can begin
your duties. If you have any doubts of
yourself take up some other profession.
for you will be a failure in this. l have
watched the career of scores of eleva-
tor boys and lamented the failure of a
good share of them. There was Johnny
Beers. He was a red headed boy with
a turned up nose and ears that started
out to be palm leaf fans. but stopped
halfway. His mother wanted him to
be Il lawyer and his father wanted him
to be a doctor, but he thought that ele-
waiting an elevator was the only thing
for him.
Within three months he fell in love
six or seven times, and it was his
proposal of matrimony to a widow
forty years old that finally sent him
out of the building with the agents
boot behind him.
And when Mike Salters was offered
a place to conduct a gilded cage in a
twelve story palace of an apartment
house he came to me to get pointers.
1t was a grand opening. The house
was occupied by aristocrats. Success
would be his if he only struck the
right road. l warned him of the pit
falls, and with tears in his eyes he
solemnly promised to avoid them.
Maybe it was his mothers fault that
he failed to do so, for she was a ro-
mantle lady, and the first thing she did
was to have him change his name to
Claude La Sale. He was told to adj
dress every man as monsieur and ev-
cry woman as madame and to lift his
cap and smile a smile as he addressed
them. He was told that in case he
carried a lone lady up or down he
should ask after her health. refer to
the weather and be as entertaining as
he could.
The tenants were amused for awhile
and then began to make complaints.
and one day after he had advised a
broker to quit that trade and open a
sawmill somewhere he vanished from
the building and never came back.
My heart saddens as | think of the
case of Jim Clark. He came to me
as others had done, and. though he
had once licked me when l had a sore
finger and could not use my right hand,
1 sat down and had a fatherly talk
with him. He agreed to do as l told
him, and if he had kept to his prom
Use he might now have been the owner
of the geological gardens in the
Bronx, to say nothing OF being the hus-
band of a widow worth $10,000,000.
Jimmy restrained himself for a cou-
pie of weeks and then broke out. He
felt that his passengers expected to
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surprise them. He jounced and
bounced that elevator until women
screamed and men swore. and one
day when he got stuck between the
nineteenth and twentieth floors and
every passenger was half scared to
death Jimmy held up his hands and
shouted:
Gal nf Won chI1f mi Whats oil fhic
row about, anyhow? Let me explain
to you that this cage got tired and is
only restin'. There is no danger
whatever. 1t will start up agin when
it feels like it. I am here to save you"
When the elevator at last reached
the first floor Jimmy was the first n
out. He went out as if kicked from
behind, and he kept IN down the cor
ridor and out of the front door and
out on the sidewalk. Jimmy is now the
driver of a motor truck. and, though he
suns over three or four people a day
on the street. he has no future before
him. To be a success as an elevator
boy Is as easy as to be a failure. One
need not be slavish. but he must be
modest and respectful. He may be
cheerful, but not enthusiastic. He
may be dignified but not surly. If
a travelling drummer takes his cage
for the twelfth floor and slaps him
on the back and calls him "old man.
he may smile in reply to show that he
appreciates humor, but he should not
go further than that.
The car starter in a s%kyscraper is
always a young man of great dignity
when on duty. The elevator boy must
respect that dignity. He is expected
to divide his tips with the starter,
and If caught holding out on him
there is sure to be a row.
The engineer of a s%kyscraper expects
the elevator boy to keep him in Gig
arettes. This sometimes comes hard
nnOn tha hOV'S nurse. but IL is only n