Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1917-12-20
WHY DON'T MEN
PROPOSE EASILY
Every Woman, Down in Her
Heart, Wants to
Marry
BY BEATRICE FAIRFAX


poser" Long, long ago, that was a
popular song. 1 don't remember
what mamma" answered, but do
remember that all the generations of
girls who have been coming along
since the days when that song was
written have had the same question
in their minds.
Why don't the men propose-and
how can they be made to? Impo--
tant problem it is-needing solu-
ton. No matter how she lies about
it, either publicly, privately or deep
within the recesses of her own soul,
every woman wants to marry. Don't
misread this and jump at conclu-
sions.
1 am not saying that either every
or any woman wants to marry Just
any man." Marriage means more
than ceasing to be Miss Smith, who
works for her own living and eats
alone at a cheap table d'hote of an
evening and turning into Mrs. Jones,
Who is supported by q husband and
fairly certain he will at least come
for dinner if the cooking is good.
Marriage in the true sense, the sense
in which any fine woman looks upon
it. means mating-rintellectu spir-
itual and physical mating.
Now, when Marion Thomson
twenty-three, charming, of good
family, sweet, lovable and earnest,
meets Arthur Johnson, twenty
eight, fine principled, we'll able to
support a wife and altogether the
sort of man Marions best instincts
make her admire. there might well
he pleasant little romance. There
ought to be, but all too often things
gang agley" and this is what hap
pens:
The Meeting
Marion meets Arthur, attracts
him. attracts him more and more,
SHOWS that he is by no means dis
tasteful to her. Tentatively, they
SO up little path together-friehd-
ly -friends-half-co con-
fessed lovers. And then suddenly
Arthur walks out of Marion's life
just as she felt "a declaration"
trembling on the brink of express
sion.
Marion can't figure out what it is
all about. Arthur was fond of her.
Arthur and she were fond of each
other for the matter of that. They
belonged to the same social plane.
There isn't any reason that Marion
can see for a man to be devotion it.
self up to August 5, 1917, and then
vanish out of her knowledge COM
pletely, finally. ineXorably.
Marion writes a little note. invit-
ing Arthur to call. He ignores it.
1,A fA1n Ia L, t.,
in, but If she will leave her num-
ber Mr.. Johnson will telephone her
directly he returns. Marion leaves
her number; Arthur does not phone.
Three months have passed and Ar
thur is still a mysterious stranger
to the girl who felt fairly sure just
a season ago that he meant to be
everything in the world to her be-
fore long. Why? Why? Marion
has racked her brain. puzzled over it
all-suffers more than a bit and
waits helplessly for the mystery to
solve itself.
AS a matter of fact, there isn't any
mystery. The whole thing reduces
itself to these terms: Arthur likes
his freedom. He doesn't want to
assume responsibilities. He doesn't
particularly approve of the marri-
ages he sees all around him. He'd
rather wait a few years longer "
So when he was simply attracted by
Marion, rather fond of her, he went
ahead with the friendship and en-
joyed 1t in carefree fashion. Then
it began to mean great deal to him
a very great deal and he decided
that he was thinking too much about
Marion.
Arthur cares too much to be "just
friends He cares too little to want
to bind himself to Marion for life
The world is full of distractions, full
of amusing temporary relationships.
So Arthur goes out of Marion's life
because he wants to avoid response.
b!lity, definite ties, because he does
not wish the appeal she makes to
him tc become so great that she will
ever be necessary to him and he
cannot go away. He enjoys phi
landering. He doesn't want respon.
sibilities.
Marion is unhappy for causes
woven of many strands. Men like to
philander and as long as there are
women to philander with, they will
continue to amuse themselves where
they are free to play without any
obligations of settling down TO a
long trip in double harness because
they have been trotting along side
Human Nature Unstable
Human nature is unstable. Life is
fluX. Change and unrest are part
of the worlds portion. So men,
quite without meaning to be cruel
or brutal or caddish, go off and
leave the girls who have expected to
work out the attraction they two
feel foI each other to its logical
conclusion. And women who have
let themselves become emotionally
involved on insufficient evidence find
themselves left to grin and bear it
or-not grin and bear it.
The way out? First of all. a lit
tie more chivalry among women
a definite standard of conduct from
which decent women will not de-
part. The girl who lets any man
who appeals to her a bit make light
and easy love to her is probably
stealing another girls husband and
losing her own real chances of mar
riage.
Men must be taught that stability
and loyalty and real devotion are
required of them If they are to be
given happy emotional experience
and privileges. And women must
not day-dream themselves into rose
hung cottages with men who may
only be philandering a bit and who
would run miles, if they dreamed
that they were walking themselves
intO serious SitI1a ti0nG