The Hays free press. [volume] (Hays, Kan.) 1908-1924, 1917-03-03
THINKLETS
tBy HARRY STOCK

This colyum was somewhat sur
prised, to say the least, to find con-
temporary who was willing to believe
that we are either in the state of suf-
fering from the fervour of devotion
or pining away because of unrequit-
ed return of affection. Of course the
contemp. is a married man-one of
those animals who think all who have
have not submitted to the matrimon-
ial belong to one of the two mention
ed classes. This colyum will continue
to attempt poetry.
The envy of the man who only Wis
its restaurant occasionally is the one
who calls the mattresses by their first
names and is a personal friend of
the chef.
The bulletin announcing the close
of the postoffice on the Sunday, after
March 1st, has been posted. This will
discommode many who use the lobby
as a meeting place Sunday mornings
Unless another form of amusement
is found soon, people will be forced
to attend church to while away this
dreary day.
Despite the spring poet-despite
the pen of the paragrapher-the har-
bingers of the spring are not the
barefoot boys, nor the bluebirds.
Spring comes when Mr.. Renter tits
his hat, scratches his head, runs his
fists deeper into his pockets, spreads
his feet and opines he'll build a new
house this spring.
oooo
P Connor, the Kansas City Wealth
er regulator and prophet states that
February was the driest month in
twenty-eight years. Very true, es-
March will be.
A jeweler in Detroit, has added
eggs to his jewelry stock. This col
yum has advocated this move since
the yolks have turned to gold.
The threatened war with Germany
has failed to rouse my ire.
To carry arms and strut and fuss me
seems in vain desire,
Yet should the break be broken and
fighting fights begin
I'll grab my little muslet and help
U. S. to win.
5000
With morphine selling at only S25
the ounce, and atrophine tipping the
market at S144 the ounce it would
be a popular habit.
The New York Sun sees it this
way:
H. C. L.
]. o. u
S. o. S.
P. D. Q.
Mr.. Simon Loewenstein, of Mt.
| Clements, announces the engagement
of his daughter, Anna J. to Bernard
E. Anspacvh of Detroit The Detroit
Free Press announces the proceeds
will be devoted to patriotic purposes
The Ellis County Teachers Asso-
citation will meet at 80 p. m, Sat
urday, March 8, 1917, at the High
| School in Hays. At this meeting the
primary contests will be held to select
representatives. to represent Ellis
County in the Golden Belt Educa-
tional Association contests.
There will be contests in reading,
| spelling, oratory, vocal music and or
chestra. The rules published in the
| g. B. E. A. announcements will gov
ern these contests.
There will be two contests IN read
ing: (A) may be entered by any pu-
1 pill enrolled IN the rural and graded
| schools of Ellis County, and who are
classed below the sixth grade; OBJ
may be entered by all pupils in rural
and graded schools of Ellis County,
classed IN the sixth, seventh, and
eighth grades.
The spelling contests may be en-
tered by pupils enrolled in any rural
graded, or high school of the county.
Oratory, vocal music, and orches-
ira are for High School pulls only.
As so few Of our rural schools viii
contests IN reading with the graded
schools of the cities, a special con-
test IN this subject and IN vocal mu-
sic viii be held. This contest viii
be open to all pupils enrolled N the
rural schools who do not take part in
the preliminary reading contests
We hope that many Of the rural
schools VIII take part IN these last
two contests
Following Is the program for the
day:
Roll Call
Contests
Reading Ia, reading (b), spell