davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Fargo forum and daily republican. [volume] (Fargo, N.D.) 1894-1957, 1917-12-29
BUSINESS COURTESY.

Occasionally there comes a BUSH
ness letter stamped at the bottom
with the offensive notation dictated
but not read. There is but one
fitting rejoinder to such a letter. It
should be stamped opened, but not
read" and returned to the sender.
Lack of courtesy in a business
firm, like lack of courtesy in social
circles, Is a sign of insecurity OF
standing. The business firm that
sends out such a letter tries to con-
vey an impression Of great haste I'M
der extreme pressure of business,
and Of consequent prosperity. The
real man Of affairs who receives such
a letter thinks only Of its lack Of
good taste, and the inefficiency Of
sending out a letter that has not
been read. He sees in it an attempt
to cover up an insecure business
footing by blum. just as the person
OF good breeding who has received
q social slight, sees in 1t only sign
OF social insecurity on the part of
the person who thinks it necessary
to adopt such an attitude.
II it is necessary for a business
man to dictate some letters and leave
them for his stenographer to sign
for him, the correct and courteous
method is for the stenographer to
sign his name with the notation
The Fargo forum and daily republican. [volume] (Fargo, N.D.) 1894-1957, 1917-12-29

set by with II as wen as you do. You
know that learned long ago that In
order to be a real nifty artist in de-
ception, Il would be necessary to
pretend q deep religious sentiment.
Say Bin, the way you slaughter chill
dren, killed 500 at one raid in Lon
don, and outrage women folks and
old folks is a caution. 1t nearly takes
my breath away; but when see you
telling your soldiers, and your people
that you do this by the help OF God
l nearly laugh myself sick. But we
can tell you about this some other
time, just now let me tell you what
am and have heen doing.
You know that / could not bear
to see you lose this war. Now I am
going to tell you again that / want
you to finish the job UP before the
United States gets into the game for
good. They are poor starters, in
fact think they talk too much to
be real good in getting at IL, but
when they once do get into IL, they
viii fight and fight like nose ever
fought before. tried to make that
country q slave nation, at one time,
but they got down to business after
a bit, and put IL over on me. 4
started a small addition to hell down
in Cuba once, and about the time
that l had things coming my way
nicely, they got into the game, and
cleaned us up in a short time. They
will do the same thing now; hence
get busy and finish up.
Il am having these people start
agftations for peace, agitations
for higher wages, higher prices.
and in fact for anything at all ex-
cept efficiency In their government.
In congress l have my friends raise
grave constitutional questions about
military matters. ! have them ques-
ton the honesty and the wisdom Of
the government; and have them pro-
pose substitutes for the measures
think that am asleep at the switch,
you just think again.
Not only that, but / have my
active agents out destroying prop
erty of all sorts. There was time
when l confined my efforts to mill
tary establishments, but l have |
learned better. / attack anything
that can be destroyed from the muni- |
tiona plants to the most peaceful |
home. / have my friends, who are
rich, try to get richer, on account OF
the war. and my friends who are
poor, try TO get rich on account OF |
the war. In fact / have a squabble |
started between them that bids fair
to do for the nation what the. same |
did for us in Russia. In |
other words, am appealing to the
selfishness in each. and 1t works like
a charm.
Let me assure you again that I |
have not resigned, and win not re-
sign. will stay on the job. and
give an account of myself that will
yet make the world realize that an
Did dog can be taught new tricks.
Congress IL now in session. and 4
| am devoting little time each day,
TO that body. and / must now hurry
off to Washington to confer with my
friends in congress.
"As ever your devoted,
SATAN"
The Fargo forum and daily republican. [volume] (Fargo, N.D.) 1894-1957, 1917-12-29
Other Mems Views
An Editorial That May or May No
Square With The Forums
CDinionA,

From The New REPUBLIC: The per-
manent Punishment OF the Turks
from the holy land and the holy
city would appeal wildly to the moral
imagination Of Christendom, and all
people OF Christian traditions would
like to know whether the heather are
going TO be restored and IL so who
favors their restoration. Do the
Austrian Catholics favor It? DO the
German Catholics? Do the German
Protestants?
These questions should be address,
ed publicly to Austrian and German
public opinion by some conspicuous
statesman of the allies, such as
President Wilson or Lloyd George;
and the answer would make interest
ing reading-more interesting even to
Jews than to Christians. For Zionism
has been gathering since the war be-
gan as a great social and religious
movement. Its future depends upon
the future occupation of Palestine by
the Jews-upon a new and permanent
return Of the Jews to Jerusalem.
II German and Austrian Chris
tians and Jews propose to defeat this
contamination and will insist upon
the possession of Palestine by the
Turks, their fellow believers in other
lands would like to know it.
The Fargo forum and daily republican. [volume] (Fargo, N.D.) 1894-1957, 1917-12-29
MAY THEIR SHADOWS GROW
LESS.

Doubtless It was some slender
youth with the wasp like waist of a
clothing store advertisement that
said it, but the remark has been
passed that mo gentleman weighs
over 200 pounds.
OF course 1t Is as cruelty untrue
al the remark attributed to Dr..
0sler, which he never made, to the
effect that a man has passed his era
OF usefulness at 40.
But untrue though 1t be, there
come times. as for example while
watching smiling Douglas of the
movies leap a six foot fence, that the
man who has passed the 80 mark, or
is sailing along in the forties, or
flfties, wishes with Hamlet, that his
'too, too solid flesh would melt".
There is no royal road to the elimina-
ton Of a convex profile.
1t is a long. hard road back to the
slim slenderness Of youth and the
renewal of the arteries. but the Far
go y. NJ. c. A is organizing special
work among business men to make
them physically At for the added
burdens Of war. A special meeting
will be held tomorrow afternoon at
o'clock for the purpose.
Hail to the drive on surplus en-
bonpoint. May the shadows Of the
members grow steadily less.
The Fargo forum and daily republican. [volume] (Fargo, N.D.) 1894-1957, 1917-12-29
Freedom OF The Seas

BY Hamilton Bell Of The ViaiIantes.
A word about that mysterious
phrase THE Freedom Of the Seas"
may be permitted. Before the war
there was. OF course, perfect freedom
OF the seas. Ships of all nations
came and went on their lawful oc~
casions without any sort of inter-
ference.
AS a question of practical inter-
national politics this phrase wou%
seem to mean that neutrals should
be at liberty to trade with belliger-
ents subject to the time -honored re-
strictions of blockade and contra
brand. Let us define these-contra-
band first. So long as nations fought
with comparatively small armies and
comparatively few weapons and sim
pie material, it was possible to define
the comparatively few articles which
constituted material Of war. But now
that armies and the services that
feed and supply them have become
indistinguishable from the nation at
large, and when the vast concourse OF
fighters and workers needs all the re-
sources and commodities known to a
highly developed modern science, the
limits of contraband Of war become
almost impossible to define. So too
with q bloclzade--So long as 1t was
possible for a squadron to lie close
OF an. enemy's port indefinitely there
was no great difficulty in defining a
blockade or In framing rules for its
conduct: but with the advent of the
mine, torpedo and submarine these
conditions which admitted simple
regulation have disappeared and an
enemy's coast has TO be blockaded
from a vast distance and when the
nations as a whole become the belli-
gerent forces OF either side, military
and commercial blockades become
indistinguishable.
No objection has ever been made
to the siege OF city with its COM
comitant deprivation OF the inhabi-
tants, not merely OF contraband Of
war but of every kind of supplies
even to those necessary to the
maintenance OF life. The extension
OF this principle to the land frontiers
where possible always accomplish
ed. To deny to naval forces what is
not and cannot be denied to military
forces is by no means easy IL JUS
tice to all men is TO be done. Indeed
so dificult Is 1t that 1t amounts to
impossibiIity, and freedom of the
seas during time Of war In the sense
Just defined becomes a Utopian
vision incapable OF realization.
There is no doubt that II is most
desirable that the sea ways shcsnd
be continually open to private en-
terprise, and that the capture of
private property at sea should be
prohibited as it is on land--theoreti-
cally. But while one belligerent-
Germany not only does not recognize
fhis even fheoreticalIy let alone
practically, on land. It seems illogical
may we not say preposterous-tha
she should demand it at sea. Per-
The Fargo forum and daily republican. [volume] (Fargo, N.D.) 1894-1957, 1917-12-29
GAINING ON THE SUBS.

AT last there is some information,
how reliable is not known, concern
inE the rate at which submarines
are being sunk by the Allied fleets.
Since the beginning Of the war, the
British admiralty has carefully pre-
served the secret of the number Of
submarines sunk. The German sail
ora were not permitted to know the
fate Of the men who did not return.
But this week q special dispatch
"a The New York Sun purported to
give some information based on the
latest available data from London
and Paris. 1t stated that the sub
marines were being sunk at the rate
OF LIS q day. or five in four days. 1t
was stated that the rate Of con-
struction did not exceed rs per day,
OF three in four days. That would
mean that every four days two more
Submarines were sunk than were
constructed.
III these figures are correct, the
favorable showing is due to three
chief factors: the depth bomb; the
assistance Of the American feet Of
destroyers and the change from a de-
fensive to an offensive campaign.
Formerly the destroyers were con-
tent 10 remain on the defensive, and
simply beat OF attacks. But now
tho submarine is on the defensive,
tlianks TO the great additions to the
fishting forces OF the Allies, and the
numerous inventions for detecting
and destroying the underwater
The Fargo forum and daily republican. [volume] (Fargo, N.D.) 1894-1957, 1917-12-29

f. f. Stratton of Fargo college
sends in an aftermath to the old
favorite, THE Night Before Christ
mas" which was republished In
The Forum last Saturday.
The pitiless American sense OF
humor leaves nothing sacred. For
example. stage comedians to the con-
trary, there may be constant hus-
bands; there may be happily welded
couples; there may be mothers lin
law who are kindly souls; there may
be New Years resolutions that are
So let's spare the Christmas
spirit After which little sermon,
we now present Mr.. strattons
jingle.
IT'S the day after Christmas; the
house is forlorn,
The trinkets are old. the candy Is
gone,
Our father rose early. Accusing St.
Nick
And mother looks worried, for baby
is sick.
The kiddies are cross and making p
noiseJ
The sled's in the way, and the
skates and the toys
Are useless 10 SooInS TAG SS0NSSASS-
That surely T.S1 each child now feels in
his breast.
How very discouraged good Santa
If these peevish children his old eyes
could see.
He. too, has had trouble in getting
around
Each year, he's worked harder 70
cover the ground.
And now his old team has about
given out.
Old age has subdued them, they
don't heed his shout,
And "Dasher" and Dancer ana
"PrancerY and Vixen"
Have slipped off the roof where his
pack he was fixin'.
And down from the caves 10 the
pavement below
The whole blessed outfit mas stFucA
in the snow.
His miniature sleigh" has collapsed
in a heap
So completely destroyed that there
nothing q keep
Now he'll buy him Fora Anu
speed on hts way
And serve up the reindeer Tor saus-
age some day.
IT'S wartime and we must Pc tFg-
ing to save
From the meat and the sugar we're
accustomed to have.
But the children can't spare phe
conventional treat
Though Santa is often now seen on
the street.
This modern old saint grown 90
pussy and tat
No longer deceives any wide-a-wake
brat.
These chimneys are small and furn-
aces hot
He couldn't get through them, u ne
wanted or not.
But what do they care, II the pres~
ents they get,
Whether brought through the Chin
ney or key-hole and set
They prate about Santa thoash eve
The Fargo forum and daily republican. [volume] (Fargo, N.D.) 1894-1957, 1917-12-29

columns may attempt to picture con-
ditions in England, but the agony
column of The Times does it much
more effectively. For example, note
this:
Nursing home in own extensive
grounds, away from air raids. Only
40 minutes from London, receives a
few ladies requiring rest cure.
Away from air raids" for a rest
cure speaks volumes OF what the
nervously inclined may suffer from
air raids.
Again: Would one or two city
men come and carve one day weekly
at a soldiers canteen near bank"
The. reason for such an advertise
ment is puzzling to an American.
Some person wants to purchase
genuine war relics, an aeroplane
blade preferred. A French officer
blinded at Verdun wants a position
as tutor in the French language. A
varsity man, bachelor" who has
been ''overworked in war; wants a
position as a paying guest, at a
country home where there is plenty
Of good riding available. An auc-
ton bridge club advertIses it has
vacancies for a few ladies and gen.
tlemen" which may be the equivalent
Of the American expression door
rights reserved. The Irish Distress
ed ladies" fund advertises it has
changed its address. One enterpris-
ing merchant wants to buy cast off
clothing or teeth.
There is no lack Of advertisements
of lectures, concerts, art exhibits
and entertainments of all kinds, but
there is q longer list Of advertise
ments for various charities.
1t is not a pleasant picture that is
left on the mind Of the reader 1t is
an impression of a huge, saddened,
sombre city. with countless in
diyiduai tragedies suggested by the
few which protrude through the ad-
vertising columns of the papers.
The Fargo forum and daily republican. [volume] (Fargo, N.D.) 1894-1957, 1917-12-29
Like the Sentimental
Songs

Francis Rogers in The Outlook:
Our little concert party consists Of
my wife, myself and Roger Lyon
My wife recites poems and tells
stories, sing. and Lyon plays the
accomplishments and helps to con-
duct the choruses. Give us q piano
and an audience, and we will give
you a concert at a moments notice
We can even dispense with the
piano. II is touching to see the
response of the boys; they are all so
eager for home talk and to hear the
poems, stories and songs associated
with their home life. They are
healthiIy homesick, every mothers
son of them, and their fondness for
mother" poems and songs gives
proof Of what good mothers they
have had. Al poem Of my wifes
called Now that My Boy Has Gone
to France" In which a mother ex-
presses her belief IN the high ideals
Of her boy, Is a great favorite; and
among my songs none is more popu-
lar than mother Machree" and
Mother o. Nine Among the songs
of different sentiment, I Hear You
Calling Me" and Bruno Huhn's fine
setting OF Henleys "Invictus" are
much liked.
t'The faworite poet Of the camps
seems certainly to be Robert wv. Ser
vice, and many OF the boys know his
Rhymes OF a Red Cross Man" all
most by heart. THE Pipe Of Sandy
McGrawf and @F'leurette" appeal es-
pecialig 20 them. Ralev's old Nan
and Jim never fails % It's eEkeet
The Fargo forum and daily republican. [volume] (Fargo, N.D.) 1894-1957, 1917-12-29
Honor Forbids

BY Robert Adger Bowen OF The
Viuilantss.
Honor forbids that we may longer be
The friends OF those who uphold
Germany.
Between the man who'd keep his
manhood clean
And him who champions all that's
vile and mean
Must yawn a chasm hridgeless as
the sea.
May We forget the scarlet infamy?
The bastard deeds that meet with
jubilee?
The foul excuses which no lies
may screen?
Honor forbids!
Our country calls. And answering
her decree
Youth bright with promise puts its
life in fee.
Nor may there any longer lie be-
tween
Cur souls and German arrogance
serene
The semblance Of a manly sympathy.
Honor forbidsl
The Fargo forum and daily republican. [volume] (Fargo, N.D.) 1894-1957, 1917-12-29

haps this Is now unnecessarily kick.
ing in an open door. Since the Uni-
ted States has entered the war she
has subscribed TO the doctrine that
freedom OF the Seas" In the Ger
man sense Nof the phrase is out of
the question. She sometimes mere
frankly defines it as sThe Empire of
the Atlantic" The Declaration on
the Embargo as illustrated tn the
holding OF the Dutch grain vessels
in the port Of New York Il proof Or
this fact.
II Is suficient testimony to the
work done by the British feet In this
war to say that IL IT were eliminated
from the contest the war would end
at once in Germany's favor, and her
invasion Of the practically defence
less United States would be Instant
aneous. Bankrupt Germany has boast
cd that she expects this country to
pay her the most colossal indemnity
ever exacted by a conquering ma
tion, and she would come for it
without a moments delay and get
~
The Fargo forum and daily republican. [volume] (Fargo, N.D.) 1894-1957, 1917-12-29
A Course In -?
BY Reinette Lovewell OF
the VIgilantes.

Efie Perkins started in at busi-
ness college" last Monday morning.
In eight months or a year she viii
be ready for job, and a pay enve-
lope.
Then she will sit all day in an Of
flee and tap out words on a type-
writer. She knows girls who have
jobs like that--and they wear ten
dollar shoes and Georgette crepe
blouses and white kid gloves.
Effie is a husky girl, with bright
eyes and healthy pink skin. Her
people have lived in the United
States more than two hundred years
and she has sung MY Country tits
Of Thee, Sweet Land of Liberty"
ever since she could lisp.
But-she is going to take a course
in shorthand and typewritIng now
in war time-when one Of the great
est needs of her country lie nurses
NOT volunteer nurses, but trained
nurses, nurses who start right at the
bottom as probationers in d hospital.
and get real old fashioned backache
doing the hardest sort of manual la
Dor. Nurses whose uniforms become
blood stained; whose fingers are
eaten by acids. Nurses who get 40
tired that they drop asleep with their
Snoes on swollen feet. Nurses who
learn how to lift unconscious forms
in the grim white wards, TO bandave
and to bathe-to hold back death.
Not only abroad. but at home are
nurses needed. The country must
above all things keep fit. There must
be no waste for lack of Intelligent
care-no lives snuffed out because
the nurse on duty has too much 10
DO and there Is no one to relieve her.
It's hard, stern, heart-rending bust
ness, compared to taking dictation in
an once with a rug on the floor, but
It's helping the United States Of
America to preserve her liberty and
n me- locals IN an hour Of terrific need.
There won't be much chance to wear
nufry blouses and silk stockings. but
there will be q chance for something
mighty big and womanly-and Amer
lean!
The Office jobs can wait the hos
pital wards cannot
Don't hesitate, girls!
The Fargo forum and daily republican. [volume] (Fargo, N.D.) 1894-1957, 1917-12-29
The Editor s Mail Bag

cry child sees
That the presents he gets all grow
upon trees.
To The Editor of The Forum:
Yesterday visited q meat market
and was interested in watching the
purchases of the customers there,
Two men, whose features indicated
American ancestry, bought fishi It
being a meatless day. Two others,
who were in the store. and whose
features indicated foreign birth or
ancestry, bought meat. Can't some
thing be done or said that will put
an end to the disloyal ones profiting
from the sacrifices Of the loyal?
FARGO AMERICAN.
Fargo. N. D.. Dec. rs.
Very good except the little fling
taken at those OF foreign" birth.
It would be just as unfair to say that
all Presbyterians, or all Democrats
were disloyal because there might be
a few disIoyaI Presbyterians, or
Democrats, as to class all foreign
ers' as disloyal. Why not just say
there were two men in the store who
were not doing their duty2 A man
who observes the spirit Of food con-
servation regulations, is showing
his loyalty whether he was born in
Potsdam or North Dakota.
Most Americans are OF foreign
ancestry" II you go back one or two
generations and after the showing
made in the Christmas Red Cross
campaign by one German commun-
ity, even the loyalty of many OF Ger
man birth or ancestry, cannot be
questioned. There Is just one test
to apply now. That is: Are you
wholly and actively an American
now, or not2" A man who arrived I'm
America five years ago and whose
name ends in son" or mann" can
be just as good an American or per-
haps a better one, than one whose
ancestors came in the Nayhower. He
ought to be a better one, for he
knows by experience, the opportun-
tiles America has to offer
The correspondence between Kais-
er Bill and His Satanic Majesty has
been rather fully reported in The
Forum, but T. NJ Moe OF New Rock.
ford, sends in a new installment oi
the Interchange OF letters. Ii Is tor
lengthy TO publish in full, but here
is a part Of IT:
wilhelm Hohenzollern,
Berlin. Germany,
MY Dear Bill:
Il have your letter Of recent date,
urging me not to resign. 1t goes
without saying that / am still on the
job. and am going to stay on the job
| 1t is true that ! have not had time
to see you.-or write YOU as frequent
| ~ as should have. IN the last few
weeks. but have not been asleep,
not by any means.
ITO begin with. | want you to
know that we are simply too elated
for proper expression over your ae-
c0mplishmenta. and your way 0i
handing the credit for them to Cod
You know j have had d lot OF men
on the job. but / have never had any
one that could Guido me in right
down fiendishness. and then hand
the honor rs tbs job over Ia Cod. and
The Fargo forum and daily republican. [volume] (Fargo, N.D.) 1894-1957, 1917-12-29
QUEBEC AND CANADA.

The threat OF Quebec to secede
from the Canadian Dominion is not
to be taken too seriously.
That is not meant to intimate that
there may not be serious disaffection
in the province unless Sir Wilfred
Laurier throws his full influence
whole-heartedly and actively on the
side Of the Dominion government,
and urges prompt and complete
submission to the CONSUMPTION law.
Undoubtedly the feeling in quebec is
very bitter and the condition is criti-
cal, but secession is another matter.
The Canadian Confederation was
ratified by the British parliament
under the British North America
act. Before Quebec could secede
this act would have to be amended
by the British parliament acting on
unanimous request from the Can
adam Parliament. Such a request
undoubtedly would come. only after
1t had been referred to the provincial
parliaments and approved by all Of
them.
The motion. which was introduced
by Deputy Fracoeur. is worded as
follows: THAT this House is OF the
opinion that the Province Of Quebec
would be disposed to accept the rup-
ture OF the federation pact Of 1857,
II, in the opinion of the other
provinces. 1t is believed that the said
province is an obstacle to the union
and the progress and development Of
Canada
This, in effect says. "if you don't
want US. we will get out" But the
other provinces do want Quebec, and
she won't get out Moreover. If Sir
Wilfred and his followers do their
full duty by the government. the
bitterness aroused by the last cleo
ton will die down. II is within their
power to stamp out this backfire. or
to fan it into an incipient revolution.
THE MIRROR or LONDON LIFE.
As a mirror OF the life OF England,
the advertising columns Of the Lon
don newspapers are ahsorbinEly in-
teresting.
Every few days a bundle Of Eng
fish newspapers comes to The Forum
once Their news and editorial