Daily capital journal. (Salem, Oregon) 1903-1919, 1917-12-25
Margaret CARROTS
HHSl,aBi
ANGER AND FEAR COMBINED
CHAPTER XCIT
By LANE PMLPS


4
l had stopped weeping, and sat ston
lily silent. What had l done that suel
misery should come to meg l had beer
true, faithful wife, 1t couldD t b
possible that Bob didn t love me; hi
must be i'll, out of his mind to talk tC
me as he had.
1t was all ON account of those people
they were to blame, not 1! They made
him dissatisfied with his home, hi:
quiet wife. Hoy l hated them all; ev
cry single person he knew, | even hat
ed his dead mother because he had talk
ed of her as if had l been like her he
would not have ceased to love me.
But he had said that he never haG
loved me. That his feeling for me was
only gratitude. L had caught him on
the rebound. He was sick and sore be.
cause Of his mothers death and just
because Of the very traits he now con
demned in me | had soothed him. 1t
was as | had said. He was crazy, stark
crazy.
| recalled what he had said about
the house He had bought it as a home
for me and the boys after we had sep
arated. He had complained that his
wings were clipped Didn t that
silly remark show he was not himself.
| would have him see a doctor in the
morning, l thought, then glanced at
the clock and saw it was already morn
ing.
| got stiffly up and went upstairs.
/ undressed and took a hot bath. By
the time l had finished Della was up,
and before l was dressed the children
had awakened I dressed them and
then waited for Bob to appear.
"Good morning, Margaret, /" he said
quietly; as he kissed the boys.
He was very pale, and had great,
dark circles around his eyes. He ate
no breakfast, but drank two cups of
strong coffee.
"I want you to promise me some
thing Bob," 1 said to him.
"What7"
"That you will see a doctor this
"See a doctorl what for9''
"To please me, DEAR [ tried to
speak naturally, "I know you are i'll.
Perhaps you have been OVERRIDING" :"
"lou think-because of last night
[ am ill9'' he said slowly.
Yes, / am sure of it. No man who
was himself would talk as you did.
| heard a stifled sigh. Then he said:
"We won't talk of it this morning,
but | meant every word |
said last night and much more l could
not express. Think it over today. Try
10 see it. from both sides; yours and
nine. Tell me what you have decided
% do-what you will consent to do
when / return.
ike man who was almost too tired
o talk. Then he kissed the boys again
md left me.
"Can l clean the table?''
When Della spoke l for the first
ime realized that | was still sitting
It the breakfast table, a cold cup of
.offee in front in me and the unat-
ractive breakfast on the plates. Al
Ways Della cared for the boys while
We ate; then | would take them while
he did the morning work.
I rose wearily. Even the strong cof-
ZEE had given me no strength.
"You look sick, Mrs. Garrett. III
ust clear the table, then take care of
he children and you lay down. the
.irl thoughtfully said.
''Thank you Della,''
1 accepted her offer gratefully. l
elt it a relief not to have to care for
hem. Ny brain seemed almost afro
lhied. / didn t even try to think; but
brew myself on the bed, and for hours
lay there staring up at the ceiling.
hen, my body rested, my head began
o work.
Bob had declared that he had meant
What he had said the night, rather, that
aorning. He had left John Kendall s
,arty to come home and tell me those
orrible Things l couldn't t understand
t at all. / had done nothingl wives
Who had been untrue were sometimes
reated like this; but not good women
md | surely was a good woman, Why,
never had knowingly done anything
vrong in my life.
That there were sins against good
aste, sins of character, which might
e harder for a man to bear than some
f the actual sins / never thought. For
ne the ten commandments were the
oundaries beyond which one might
ot go with safety.
That my nagging; my insisting that
e live his life according to my ldeasj
~ absolute refusal to conform in any
7av to his wishes; my constant fault
hiding; and my habit Of weeping over
should in any way be to
dame for the threatened rupture
ad no slightest idea. In fact | never
ad considered any of these things as
l did them.
Luncheon time came; Della brought |
le some tea and toast on tray, but
waved her away. | felt that I should |
hoke if l tasted it. About four o 'eloek |
got up, took a cold bath, and went |
own stairs My mind still refused to |
-ork eonneetedly. Perhaps when Bob |
ame home 1 would find it all horri- |
le dream He would tell me he didn' t |
lean that he had stopped loving me-
hat he never had loved me.
fTonlOrrov Bob remains in town.