davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Glasgow courier. [volume] (Glasgow, Mont.) 1913-current, 1917-01-26
His Own Shame.

Roberts mothers admonishings to
her small Sol generally ended with the
words. I'D be ashamed Of you if you
did so and So" and the word ashamed
therefore was constantly in his ears.
One day after he had eaten up his it,
tie sisters candy his mother said to
him:
Robert. did YOU eat Dorothy's candy
when | told you not to?"
Yes. ma'am.' said Robert in n one
Of triumph, land I'm Just as ashamed
Of myself as l can be, so you needn't
Post.
The Glasgow courier. [volume] (Glasgow, Mont.) 1913-current, 1917-01-26
"SHAVETERIA" IS THE LATEST

On Fifth avenue, in Chicago, is the
first "shaveteria" ever built. You
serve yourself to a shave there, just
as you serve yourself with food at a
cafeteria.
When you m in a hurry for a
shave, and you know that you could
do it twice as quickly as it could be
done in a BARRIERS chair, you step into
the shaveteria. Down one side of the
room are clean, tile-hoored, we'll
lighted booths. Each is provided with
porcelain lavatory, hot and cold run
ming water, and all things necessary
You do not have to wait. You steT
right in and do the job up yourself.
The Glasgow courier. [volume] (Glasgow, Mont.) 1913-current, 1917-01-26
TOO MUCH FOR HIM.
He Admits He Can't Grasp HE " ifs's
ideas Of Economy.

. ct Economy.
II III understand" remarked the
Office philosopher to the visitor to his
sanctum, most of the feminine traits
and characteristics that puzzle the o.
binary man, but when a woman be.
gins to practice economy she leaves
me dashed to. the mast and Q~uivering
with helpless establishment.
"Of course. the whole sex ia eco
nomical. You have to admit that. be-
cause every woman says she is eco
nomical. and no gentleman would IN.
dertake to dispute Il lady's statement
at least, no gentleman of my acquaint-
ance would undertake to dispute it in
his own house. What--tO use a vul.
garism-gets my goat is the method
they employ.
Take my wife, for example. When
eve she tells me she IS going to econo
mize l emit a single agoniZed shrek
and then leap for the tall timber. Her
plan is to think up a whole lot OF
things she cannot possibly do without,
and then do without them. BY this
device she Mt a single stroke the
cost of the entire list. Having thus
accumulated a surplus, she naturally
proceeds to spend it. and she is al
ways prepared to prove she has saved:
much money In the process.
"There is no answer. or no answer
worth making. On occasions Of this
kind It is my edstom to pass. for. with
out looking mt my hand. I know l can
neither trump nor follow suit."-Rich.
mond T1mes-D Dispatch.
The Glasgow courier. [volume] (Glasgow, Mont.) 1913-current, 1917-01-26
IDAHO IS 4 BIG STATE.
Larger Than Al New England Wjth
Maryland Added.

Larger Than All New England Win
Maryland Added.
To those OF VI who remember Idaho
in our school Biographies as a small
pink block. shaped like an easy chair
facing east. it may be Of interest that
this state. which in 1890 added the
forty-fifth star to the constellation Of
the dag. Is nearly as large as Pennsyl-
vania and Ohio combined and larger
than the six New England states with
Maryland included for good measure.
1t is divided into thirty-three counties.
the smallest Of which is half as large
as the state Of Rhode Island and the
largest greater than the combined area
of Massachusetts and Delaware.
Idaho covers an area Of S3,SSS square
miles. divided principally between the
Rocky mountain region and the Co
lumbia plateau. only a small part in
the southeast corner of the state lying
In the great basin. In elevation above
sea level the state ranges from 730
feet, at Lewiston. to 12.O7S feet ut the
summit of Hyndman peak. 1t is drain
ed mainly to the Columbia through the
Snake river and its tributaries and has
an annual rainfall Of about seventeen
inches. the range in a single year at
different places being from six to thir-
ty-eight inches.
The industries Of the state are chiefly
agriculture, stock raising and mining.
Hay. wheat. oats and potatoes are the
principal crops. A large area is cult
waited by irrigation. The mineral pro
duction includes gold. silver. copper,
lead and archaeological Survey Bull
! 1Qf}n-
The Glasgow courier. [volume] (Glasgow, Mont.) 1913-current, 1917-01-26
Both Died a. They Wished To.

TcnnysoH, who was 4 shy. reserved
man, could never understand Robert
BrOwning's love of society. He had
been heard to remark that Browning
would die In a white chOker ut a dinner
party. The two poets died rs they
would have wished to die-Robert
Browning in the grand Palazzo Resso-
nicco. with his son by his bedside, and
Lord Tennyson in his beloved Surrey
home. surrounded by his loved ones
The Glasgow courier. [volume] (Glasgow, Mont.) 1913-current, 1917-01-26
HOT IN THE SUPERLATIVE

A preacher was describing the
"bad place" to the congregation of
shellbacks.
"Shipmates," he said, "you've seen
the molten iron come running out OF
the furnace, haven't you? 1t comes
out white hot, sizzling and Kissing,
like some kind of snaky, horrible mon
ster. Well, shipmates"-
The preacher pointed his foretinger
at the awed shellbacks.
"Well, shipmates," he said solemn
ly, "they use that stuff for ice cream
in hades ?"
The Glasgow courier. [volume] (Glasgow, Mont.) 1913-current, 1917-01-26
Arrogant.

How are you getting aiOng with her
father?"
mot at all. He's too arrogant for
me-"
"What's the mattery"
"He eve wants to pick his own sons
in-la w.'-DetrOit free Press.
The Glasgow courier. [volume] (Glasgow, Mont.) 1913-current, 1917-01-26
Inefficient.

Mechanic-Ive gone owe. that car Of
Smiths pretty careful. but | can't find
nothin' the natter with it.. Garage
Owner Nc can't. Ell: What do We
s'pose ] hired We for:-Newark Eagle
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1917-05-27

Say. Walter, wanter hear good one, eh,
Walt?
Bugltr-No. thanks, guess not to-day,
Frank.
Mr. T.--Lis'en, Walter, what's the matter
with you? Tha's not what you're supposed to
say. it amt. Don't you remember, we had 1t
fixed up with General Wood that / was to
come out and say TO you: Hello, Walter
wanter hear a good one?" and you was to say:
"Why, yes, Frank, what is it?" or somethn'
like that Remember when we fixed it up that
way? All ri, now les begin again.
forget that we did it wrong, eh,
Walt? and lisen, Walter, let's don't
crab it again Now. remember, you
ask me what is the good one, Frank?
And then III spring it. All ready?
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1917-05-27

DIGESTION for a speech to be de-
livered by Frank Tinney when he
~ takes up his contemplated work
as recruiting exhorter. To be carried
on with the cooperation of the marine
who blows the bugle at the recruiting
tent.
Mr.. Tinney speoks-Well, recruits, the rca-
son I'm here is funny reason. il is
a funny reason an I'll tell yer why.
(Thas the way I get started on the speech, is
TO say some,hin' like what | just SAID see?
Then, after I get started on the
speech why. it's easier to finish it :.
after get started)
ITO the Buqler) Hello, Walter I.
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1917-05-27

Bugler-Well, what did the people say 10
him when he got back from the front, Frank!
Mr.. T.-Oh, gee, Walt tha's wrong. Now
you've grabbed the whole speech | was goln
to say what you said, was. That was the
point of the whole joke, for me to say that the
people said when the thin guy got back: well,
I see you're back from the front" =.
Sec? It was goin' to be that he was
so thin that they could see his back from the
front, Walt Don't you remember!
Oh. gee, tha's too bad. &.
Well. blow YOUR horn, Walt, an we'll get new
bunch around, and pull it again. An
ls'en, Walt. Hold yourself IN next
time, and all you ask me is: What did they
say when he returned? Got hI
All ri, Walter, blow your horn.
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1917-05-27

All ri. now. Hello, Walter.
Wanter hear a good one?
Bugler-Why, yes, Frank, what is 1t?
Mr.. What is it, Walter? Well,
III tell yer l.. 1t seems there was
very thin guy went to the front
See? Well, come across, Walter,
come across. =. You say some
thin next. Lis'en, Walt, amt you
bright or what? Remember here was
where you was to say: well. Frank, and what
did the people say to him when he got homer
Remember? You ask me
that. Remember? General Wood
said it ought to 20 big. All RI, les be-
gin that part again Ask me about
the thin guy, Walter, what did the people say
to him when he got home?
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1917-05-27

while a lean lank. loose-limbed indl-
vidual with a weather beaten complex
ion and leathery hands leaped on the
platform swinging Bible.
who's that warming up in front OF
the bleachers where the choir SITS"
asked the Old New Yorker.
"a natural-born outfielder.
The clapping of 10000 hands made
the building vibrate, and cries OF "Oh,
YOU, Sunday answered the question.
More applause than Home Run
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1917-05-27
Bv Henry ". Francis

tf"HE study of homlletlcS, the
late Cardinal Vaughan. OF
London. assured group OF
young theologians. should be pursued
not alone in the silence and solitude OF
the cloister, but advanced amidst the
turmoil of everyday affairs The
Divinity Student supplied the quota
ton.
IF there are sermons in stones, sad
he. 81 am inclined to believe more NOV
ing ones are in the pave stones OF the
Bowerv than in the paltry pebbles OF
Central Park.
That's very good for you" said the
Old New Yorker, "but don't make the
mistake of drawing all your morals
from the Tammany fold. What the
pewholders of to-day need is an intel
lectual and dignified theology minus
cant and NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS. sans
sensationalism. The ten, twenty, thirty
type of religion is due for quick Jade
ont. The melodramatic minister, the
fighting parson. the circus Christian
went out of style with the braided sack
coat. It's the specialist in religion TO-
day as in everything else. a Scrptural
appeal loses weight and becomes ludi-
crous if it depends for It's punch on
familiar and commonplace Illustration.
The theologian should stick to his last,
ut is evident said the Divinity
Student. that you have not heard
Billy Sunday preach
Does he do that" asked the Old
New Yorker. with all the cynicism OF
Washington Square. 81 was wondering
how he killed time between acts since
the President permanently sidetracked
Roosevelt's French expedition"
81 have two Tabernacle tickets for
his afternoons service" said the d.
vinity Student.
And l." said the Old New Yorker,
possess a lower tier Polo Grounds per-
nit. My afternoon / have planned to
spend in witnessing the discontinue OF
Jimmy Callahan's Pirates at the hands
of Johnny McGraw's hand-picked team
of pennant winners"
you've planned the impossible,
. said the Divinity Student. Games
POSTPONED on account of wet grounds.
Me ticker Just announced it together
with the dividend on my Agricultural
Chemical preferred"
'0The theologian should stick to his
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1917-05-27

announcements. unused the Old New
Yorker. Sounds Just like his 'Ba-a-at-
teries for to-da-a-ay's game -
Its Rodeheaver, Sundays musical
leader" explained the Divinity Student.
Hes singer and he plays on the
trombone"
HE should stick to his horn," said
the Old New Yorker; cts the age of
the specialist"
The 10000 voices united in singing
chorus entitled Brighten the Corner
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1917-05-27
Parallels Proving That the Req. Billy
Sunday of the Tabernacle Pulpit is Still
the Billy Sunday of Pop Anson's White
,Vor-H's as Hard to Teach an Old Ball
PLAYER Neu Tricks as 1t Is an Old Dog

last said the Old New Yorker reprov-
ingly.
THE text this afternoon is Fried
Potatoes; or, Pinwheels Within
Wheels" said the Divinity Student.
plain drivel and nonsense" irritably
exclaimed the Old New Yorker. "Where
IN the world do we get off to encourage
by our presence such a travesty on the
Gospel"
"At the 16Sth Street station said
the Divinity Student.
why, this is the very spot, should
Judge, where Hal Chase used to stand
guard at the Yanks' first sack unused
the Old New Yorker, when he was set
tied as well as it is possible for an old
New Yorker to be settled on a thirty
foot plank with twenty young New
Workers. "How times have changed
American League Park dispossessed by
an evangelist
"A baseball evangelist" corrected the
Divinity Student, while his companion
curled a disdainful lip.
A blue-suited official appeared near
what the Old New Yorker called the
plate" He carried horn which, to
the somewhat impaired vision OF the
Old New Yorker, might have appeared
TO be a megaphone.
where's the delegation from the
Pipeline Peroxide Company?' yelled
the blue-suited individual. Two hundred
of the 10000 who heard him rose; the
remainder cheered.
"Just where old McCarty, the spit
fire umpire used to stand and yell the
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1917-05-27

Baker got when he drove in the WIN
ming run in the World Series" said the
Old New Yorker. "The public is tickle;
# doesn't stick to it's favorites."
Iots of you New Workers" said the
preacher. "are so deep in your particu-
lar rut that you can't see over the SIDE.
You're hidebound, widowed. Played
50 long on the sidelines that you're not
fit for place on the diamond. benched
forever. the bunch of you, unless you
wake up"
"He talks remarkably like Wilbert
Robinson" said the Old New Yorker.
81 see some of the characteristics OF
Sturgeon in him." said the Divinity
Student.
"Ive covered the bases faster than
anv other man, alive or dead" contln-
ued the preacher. "After I took Jesus
Christ for my manager was as fast as
ever. No one ever has beaten me.
can 90 so fast now for five rounds that
Won can't see me for dust. The Bible
doesn't slow you up.
He whirled, wound up, and, hands be-
hind his head, he screamed:
81 hurl out to you the Cross OF Christ;
it's yours if you'll only put up your
hands and catch it,
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1917-05-27
There Is More Than Habit, However,
in Billy SUNDAYS Baseball Action.
There Is Good Judgment, for 1t Helps
Nauy a Male Wamderer to "Get OH
Get a Lead" on the SawdnSt Trail

"Just like CHRISTI Mathewson wnen
he puts over his slow one" said the oIo
New Yorker. 1.-THE very image OF Matn'
ewson."
81 throw out the !ifesaver OF salvs'
ton to you all-take hold-take hold
here you are, you folks way in BACK
and the evangelist went through thm0-
tions of putting over fast one nom
centre.
"Now he's iris Speaker-perfecN
marvellous the similarity Of action, en-
Unused the Old New Yorker.
There's merit in his argument ss'0
the Divinity Student. =.
"The best sermon / ever hesru'
agreed his companion. Look at MN
now-getting the devils goat-HusnN
Jennings for all the world
Cocoon. Devil, I've got you going.
Devil. Back to hell with you, you mutt
did you ever hear Jenningss seoIn,
full cry of Back to the bushesV? asksO
the Old New Yorker.
But the Divinity Student was ="
keenly interested in the "call to INV
trail"
Some on folks" yelled SUNDAY.
smiling. "Come on to Jesus. Get on. :"
your ruts, you old New Workers! i0'
don't. like my theology. You cnumP'
I've no theology; I've only mes'sAs
You don't like my slang. Come on y y
Jesus; he uses good English. Doa'
stick to the old sinking ship OF sen'
esteem-it can't float without Cnlns
Come on, old New York! Come on! -,
Jimmie Archer's SMILE said the w
New Yorker; "I'm going up to shake ~
hand
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1917-05-27

81 wanted you taken out OF the W
at first" he said, as he grasped oup
davis hand. "but you're a whole te'D
in yourself" q.
Zone error on you, pard,' SAID =
preacher. You'll play better gan
Yourself after this. Stick tight!
"But there was nothing about treps
fried potatoes or pinwheels.' said -
Old New Yorker. "You don't s'icA :
your text :, -
81 stick to the crowd" SAID =
preacher.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1917-08-04
Fall Styles
Appear at
the NJ. & K.
Great Huge Shipments of Fall Ner-
chHndiSg Being gupackeG i'm
Great Womcn's Section

They're here The fall suits. dress
es. coats. etc-
where why. at NJ. q *. who al
ways show the new styles first.
To see the new fall garments Is to
be enthusiastic about them for the
materials are beautiful. yet practical.
the c0lors dark but elegant and the
STYLES just the kind that everybody
viii like
NJ & X buyers have spent the last
three weeks in the eastern markets.
when they have been choosing the
spick and cream" Of the highest grade
merchandise. and. as result. for the
last ten DAYS new fall garments have
been pouring into NJ. * X. receiving
rooms and have been placed in stock
SO those who are planning their ward
robes early may have an early choice
The suits are stunning. a noticeab Bile
new feature being the length OF the
coats. for they are considerably longer
than any that have been shown for a
number of seasons. There are beau
tiful serge. satin and silk dresses ga
lore and the separate skirts were
never smarter
Among the great new shipments Of
waists are some stunning tailored mod
els which viii delight the tailored wo-
man and tne college girls. They are
of that celebrated make known as For
sythe. ana the materials. washable
satin. means wear silk. crepe de chine,
Ia ieTz in both white ard flesh, as weil
as some summers in stripes, are un-
usually attractive Georgette still
reigns supreme as the popular fabric
for dressy waists.
The August clearing sales aFe con
ttnuing 70 attract enthusiastic throngs
with liberal discounts still offered and
radical reductions being made in every
department.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1917-08-04
pn..ir.Enrris Engaraman-.

T--- y. g------.- ~
vs. us -, ~.
'...- 5. ~ 5r5z -
anu 81 3, p. va 'i.tl'7 --'.'l 4 .''7 :.
7.'i 49, 81 g.. a. re- t='--. - ~
~ H. -'~' N.t-L AF gI--S' ~ tft.---.-+
asz.E' son OF MI anu eil7- -
as7.=, 1919 leonard 7llrs.. 10 en-
Fol., was --aoe i"7- -.-5 -
PIe-'t's aPpo-i5-e1 parry 7.ss' - l-e
---o'l'e' on .Ae ol-o1-9Al-- a. .ls- NOME
D me- NJ e""-"s " u "@ a." event - s11ts
1,g7'7 L.7t
l5" Il' ,,''a- ---1','.7 " --'e 1-.@@ -
re l- -, e'l 1,o-N L7-s''lt anu IL - 5''.- 3
,a1 'gg-. wa7 o-+e eol u -o -
---i77 IT. S"-1 -'i.'i NJ - r
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1917-08-04

There was q good attendance at the
lee cream social held last evening on
tue lawn at the home of Mrs 9 rs.
Townsend in Sears. under auspices Of
the Ladies' Aid society Of the Sears
United Presbyterian church Small
tables were scattered about the lawn
which was decorated with japanese
lanterns About S14 was cleared. the
proceeds 20 go into the building fund
OF the church recently begun a mu-
steal program was given. consisting Of
a vocal solo by Miss Susie Forgy, and
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1917-11-14

TT ITTy GORDON In often accom-.
"a panied upon her long walks
~ by a magnificent specimen OF
Russian wolf hound. presented 60
her by a member oc the embassy 20
the court OF SO. James. The name
OF this royalty bred animal Is Car.
and Miss Gordon doesn't quite know
what Go do about this. with tho for
mer ruler OF all the Russias cxilcd 10
siberia and no other royalties In cvi.
dence TO any palpahle extent A
friend suggested calling tho creature
kerenslJy. but revolutionary poSsihil.
tiles are such that compromise
may bc effected under which Gar
may become plain Man Of the Hour.
Mary Ficlsford's picturc, The lit
tlo Princess" now playing nj tho
Liberty. Is reminder that Christ
mas IL coming and that the well
known shopping for the children
must soon commence. Christmas
trccs. roast turkeys. presents. dolls
and candy figure prominently In tho
incidents OF tho picture
The Gish girls, lillian and Dor
othy. arc hack In Los Angeles after
n trip TO Europe with ID. W. Grit
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1917-11-14

Leah BAIRD and Earic Williams led
tho grand march at "A brooklyn
movie bah tho other night
The Herbert Br~pon Film Corpora
ton Is taking no chances and has In
surcd the iifo Of otis Skinner for
$4,000 skinner II TO appear In a
plcturiYation OF "kiamot"
Tho Hungry Heart" Pauline
frcd.rick's picture. which closes Its
engagement at the Coliseum tonight
IL taken from David Graham Phil
lips novel. which was ono OF tho
best sellers when u came out
Where romances usually end. In tho
vague phrase. And they lived hap
PLY ever after" this story begins.
n. II. Herbert. who IL costarrcd
with Fiorunco Ia fiadie. In tho pa
triotle masterpiece. Tho Man With
out a Country" at the Strand. In a
prominent broadway leading man
and made hia first broadway ap.
p-,ranc. as BILLIE Burke'u leading
man five years ago. when he scored
decidedly In iinoro's "Mind-thc-
Paint Girl"
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1917-11-14

has trs~a three times 10 ret into the
army and has failed each time.
Hobart Henley IL tho latest play.
cr added to the Pathe staff Of Off
ecrn
Neal Burns and Chris Richards
have joined The Mack Sennett forces
and will appear In a Paramount.
Mack ssennctt comedy 10 be directed
by Clarence badger and featuring
Marie Provost iturnH already Ia
known to screen patrons. but Rich.
arin u from tho 'naihy" stage.
Clara kimban Young. In Tho
Price Ehe Paid" az tho Colonial. In
tho only actress IN captivity who
finds IL necessary 10 use the art OF
make up with reverse English Tier
eyes are no iarE. that she has to
make them gpr~ar smaller than
they really are Otherwise the cf.
feet on the screen is too startling.
Unusual and thoroly delightful IL
a square Deal which comes 90
tho Class A. Carlyle blackwell and
Juno f-ividEe aro starred IN this
production and Henry Hun and
Muricl ostricbo are featured Ia tho
cast
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1917-11-14

Francis Y. Busisman. ~ two
Gun" Carter. with a ready hand on
the trigger OF both guns. In n com
blnation warranted TO shoot straight
into tho affections of every patron
Of the Rex. whore '''rhe Adopted
Son 10 shown. Beverly Bayna. as
sweet Marian Conovcr. makes tho
hoid.up OF hearts complete.
the Silent Master" which win
he shown at tho Mission for tho last
times tonight. II a picture that will
set your nerves tingiing. Tho scenes
OF the story include many from the
Paris cafes and others I'm tho fash.
ionahic circles OF Now York, The
story Is adapted from y Phillips op.
penheirn's novel. The Court Of 81
Simon
The Clever Mrx. Carfax." a pho.
topiay Astounding In pcrraminEiy
funny situations. written by Hec,or
Turnhull and directed by Donald
Crisp. II Julian Eitnge's play at tho
clemmsr.
Julian Eiting- IL expected TO fol.
low the example OF Chaplin. Pair.
banks. Hart. rickford ct al. and
form a company Of as own soon. II
IL undrrutood rathe has made him
good offer.
Marshall >ciisn. Mary rickford's
director. Ia 10 continue with her aft.
~r all Mickey" has been excused
Edward Earle. vitaEraph player.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1917-11-14

Morgan. who just arrived from Alas.
ka. ana who was arrested by the dry
squad at Pier ID for having eight
quarts Of assorted liquors IN his pos.
session. was fined $50 instead Of 800
in tho police court Tuesday after.
noon.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1917-11-14

American International Shipouno-
ing office in Philadelphia
Charles A. Stone, Of Stone h
Webster. ls president Of the com
pany. which f. engaged In 49,
s5oo 600. 600 worth Of vessels
the government
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1917-11-14
Enormous Purchase and Sale of 1900 Coats Suits Dresses

M this advertisement bought such Quantities allow aded
II din
fail SALE THURSDAY.