Evening star., 1917-12-09
"Caught With the Goods"

George CreeI of the publicity bureau
was very much surprised When ne was
searched and caught with the sooaSs.
But there was nothing in the oot.le.
1T has been deleted." said the ponce
man, adding that George was up 10
his old tricks. c.a
A. c. Bedford. president OF .ne .ic,i,,
ard Oil Company. was the next Vlctlni;
and N was announced that he refused
TO be searched; he had something salu
able in his inside pocket. Ine oi.5e1f III
searched him and produced d
lar bill. ,..1u,h,e
about that" asked the chief
mir. Bedford says you'd think 1t val. al
liable if 1t was your salary from 'i'e
government for a whole year.
Here's another. chief; Mr. Le Roy
frost. a member of the board OF gov
ernors of the New York STOCK I@-
change h hnya
s.ocLs tbesa davs needs liquor for me-
dicinal purposes. You're discharged.
Mr. Frost That seems to be about an,
Sir. Go ahead with your dinner. -, ;,
I'm glad you give US 2 a clean M, piii;
said President Bennett; aou Ca,h MI nhers
ways find that the Gridiron CLUB ooeys
~ "The he Gridiron Club, Is this the Grid
iron Chm Help, Help, 1 thought It
was the Anti-Saloon League. come on
men. were in the wrong place.
one of the interesting features OF the
entertainment was sale of war saw
ings stamps. In the midst OF the pro
ceedings Frank A. Nanderlip OF tne
war savings committee and Henry
Ford took the stand in the center OF
the room. accompanied by Col. Henry
Hall of the Gridiron Club Mt van
derIip explained the scheme OF the war
savings stamps. Then Col. Han asked
for buyers He called the names OF
some of the prominent persons present,
who rising in their places, announced
their subscriptions.
Blanks were then passed among the
diners to subscribe and as these were
filed out they were passed up 10 sec
When Secretary McAdoo counted up
the blanks 1t was found that the guests
had subscribed to the amount or SlSl'-
$50.
A new limited member OF the eiue'
Herndon. Tudor MorSell. was initiated
He is a son of Herndon Morsell. who
has been limited member since 1889
The initiate came In dressed IN 1uVen-
lie attire, although he is strapping
fellow, and after being made to sing a
song and hazed a bit was declared duly
admitted Then he and his father sang
as a duet THE Song That Reached MY
Heart" which has concluded dinners OF
the club for many years.
Interpret War Tax.
It was announced tnat cOlIlfllttee OF
the club was assisting the Treasury De-
partment to interpret the new war tax
law and would show some of their analy-
ses by interrogatipg their interpreter.
What does the term .pre-war period
mean?' was asked. 1T means prior to
the 1916 election
What is net income?' Entirely a
matter of conscience.
what are the real excess profits?"
"The $500 a year which a congressman
receives"
what is information at the source"
Secretary Daniels description OF bat
tie with submarines"
"What are undivided profts?" What
the common stockholders never get"
what is near beer'?' ''Disillusion-
ment"
What is foreign partnership?
Jeremiah O'Leary, Bob La Toilette and
the kaiser"
what is a domestic partnership"
Woodrow Wilson and 100 million Amer
leans"
what is meant by the face value of
certificate of stock?" quite often
it's only value"
why did congressman exempt them
selves from the war tax " Because the
hide of hippopotamus is y Of an inch
thick"
my next-door neighbor has an income
of S1O,0 900 a year from bonds left him by
his grandfather. He pays 1855 tax. My
grandfather left me nothing. make
$4,000 a year by hard work and pay
s675 tax. Is that fair?' NO; your
grandfather was very inconsiderate."