The Washington herald., 1917-07-22
Boy. Page sherlock HoIme..

NAdANAAld LhODCALd huS F1NiCCs
these are all her names, was born on
the Fourth of July some twenty-odd
years ago. But this hasn't a great
deal to do with the case. Malvina
washes clothes whenever her hubby
has the ambition to solicit business
for her. He sits around all day with
some friends helping him do nothing.
When Malvina gets hold of some
change she very kind-heartedly pays
hubby for hanging around. With $2.5
in his pocket hubby wandered off Fri
day afternoon and meyer even said
where he was going, He should have
gone to the store. He went instead
to a craps game and lost every cent.
On his way back he made touch"
from his lady friend" Malvina.
when she heard that the man whom
she supported by the sweat. of her
brow did such a thing, did what any
other woman would have done. She
Tit" into said lady friend" and for
a few minutes the hair flew. But the
mystery is, where did hubby get that
ten spot to ray Malvina's fine? This
makes the story sound like a fairy
tale. Maybe lady friend" knows.
"Atta Boy, Roscoe,
Friday night Roscoe Conklin Rufus
Higdon went to a dance. He went
alone, as he had not been in town
long enough to know better. He
wall Powered" around for a while
until someone introduced him to a
girl who wasn't at all pleased to meet
him. Roscoe tried real hard to look
pleasant and said things about the
weather. Part of the time he was
dancing on the smooth waxed floor
and the other part of the time he
danced on the girls feet out of sheer
bashfulness.
Now here were two people with a
crouch growing every minute. Roscoe
was peeved at the apparent inatten-
ton OF the girl, and she was sore be-
cause he danced on her feet. By and
by the man the girl was looking for
all the time showed up, to Roscoe's
embarrassment. He was a rough per-
son, this intruder was, and he made
some uncomplimentary remarks about
Roscoe which he resented. Roscoe
came from a town where such a
thing is a signal for fight, and fight
he did He made mince meat out of
the "roughneck." 1t cost him SO to
defend himself and he paid it.
Sharp Sport, This.
There are several reasons why a
drunken man should not play with
a razor or have one in his possession.
The court says he might cut himself.
which isn't so bad. He might cut
someone else. and he may lose 1t, and
then have it fall into the hands of
someone else equally as irresponsible.
This applies to a man with three
razors as well as one.
Jim Embrey had three Of these
sharp weapons in his pocket Friday
afternoon. He fingered in barroom
too long II he had gone straight
home it would have been all right, but
every step he took up Four-and-a-half
street southwest someone would say
have anuzZer." He had as much as
one man could carry outside of the
razors. He fell into the arms Of a
cop and sobered up in Jail. For that
little spree and indiscretion Jim must
go to Jail for three months and pay
a SOS fine.
1t Wasn't the 18th Either.
Friday was bargain day at some
down town department stores and
Gertrude johnson and Bertha Taylor
needed some clothes. They started
out bright and early. but did some
thing rather suspicious at the start.
They carried a lot of empty paper
bags with them. Neither OF them
thought paper was so high that they
would have to wrap their own pack
ages. They had something else in
mind.
One of them lifted" a s25 coat
and ran out of the store with it.
Someone ran after her and caught
her. The other one in her haste and
nervousness got a pair of shoes. but
took two for the right foot instead
Of a matched pair. She had all her
trouble for nothing. Just because
both of them were bunglers when It
came to shoplifting they will have to
go to Jail. Gertrude got six months
and Bertha got three months.
Back, Back, Back to Occoqunn.
On the 9Th of July the gates of Oc-
coquan opened and Mary Montgomery
walked forth a free woman. What
she went there for doesn't make any
difference, as the censor won't let
us tell. Mary went back to her old
stamping ground and she confidently
expected the folks to have a party
in honor of her return. But she
guessed entirely wrong. Folks even
Stunned her. Even Emma Tyler once
her best friend had no welcome"
sign on the door. And what did
Mary do but heave q brick through
Emma's front window. This made
Emma angry and she had Mary
arrested. A $25 fine stares Mary in
the face, but what's the difference?
Mary never saw S25 at one time and
she will return whence she came for
a sojourn of sixty days.