Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1917-02-15
BE HELPFUL BUT
NOT PATRONIZING
Busybodies of Life Discussed
by Noted Writer of Wo-
mems Problems
BY BEATRICE FAIRFAX

The consciousness of power over 9TH
ers brings the most exquisite joy to
any human being. To be able to regu-
late other peoples lives seems a very
desirable position to most of US. or
course all life is managed on this basis
from the institution of an Emperor
down to that of a political boss.
But most of us do not recognize the
tyranny in our own natures for just
what 1t is. We call ourselves philan-
thropists and neglect to consider just
how welcome our philanthropy is.
l know a girl who took her stand
agai"s, ner whole family and assisted
her Younger brother in making mar
rage y, men to his youthful fancy seem
ed desirable. The girl had wonderful
feeling tnat she was playing Provi-
his sweetheart. She was a managing
young woman and stood out against all
or her people for what she consider
ed very beautiful and noble reasons;
She imagined she was actuated by
peautifuI sentiment of desire to make
others happy. She fancied she was the
on one vis person who S1 could get the point d1t
brother and the girl her whole family
deemed rather an adventures.
Sister CLOSED over the whole situ-
alton ana. with a feeling of nobility,
engineered u marriage which the boy
would never have put through by him.
SELF. TWO years proved 1t disastrous.
And like disaster attends almost all in
stances where one human being steps
in and manages the affairs of another.
II Is never tair to insist on regulat-
ing oLher peoples lives. 1t forces them
into an attitude of weak helplessness
that makes them parasites, whether
they are conscious or unconscious of It,
Being helpful is another matter. 1t
means giving aid where aid is honest
ly needed. 1t means answering cry
Tor assistance and letting someone who
else's opinion or of having their doubt
fulness borstered up bit recognize
the fact that the world is not a totally
cold and Indifferent place.
Between playing Providence and
being caliously Indifferent to the needs
OF others there is tremendous field
OF Of, s sympathy and helpful kindness;
thing that .patronizingly takes a square
| peg out OF square hole where 1t is
comfortably ensconced, and insists on
a notch or two higher up in the world
1t means manufacturing discomfort
Tor the object of your experiment If
you happen to fail. and making a weak
ling who needs to be directed out OF
that object If you succeed with him.
On the other hand. being helpful
one who has sat ali his life in an in
valid chair. who wants to walk and
yet who does not know quite how to
| take the first step alone. 1t means aid
comfort and the benefit of greater wis
dom and advice. 1t means being guide
counsellor and friend. 1t never means
leading someone whom you have blind
folded or dragging someone forward
IN long strides when they have a ca
pacity for taking short steps alone.
Feeling that you are a Lady Bounti-
ful to heaven-like arbiter of des-
TIMES may be rather pleasant for you
but it is miserably unfair to any one
| else concerned. Don't be guilty of 1t
Playing Providence" is just play y-act-
XOuTSelf. hat
in reality you are just a self-centered
boss quite like the child who won't
play" unless 1t can be president.