Grand Forks herald. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1916-1955, 1917-06-30
The Best of Hunror.
Good Stories from Many Sources.

A Boonton. N. j., real estate man
was trying to sell a small farm by
mail to a possible purchaser in Man.
haitian, a very precise and particular
person. One day a friend asked him
how he was making out on the deal.
of marked pleasure. "You see. he
wrote for SO many details. M kept
insisting on having more. that I got
tired at last and wrote. telling him il
he would pay the freight both ways I
would ship the darn farm down to the
city for him to ook at, and he never
answered my letter."-Puck.
Pestered by the ever-advancing cost
of living, and determined to exercise a
protective vigilance in the future even
in small matters, the customer picked
up a knife from the counter and
handed it to the butcher with a
friendly smile. II don't really want
it," he said. "but If you will u it
off | will take it along with the rest"
"Cut off what?" demanded the BUTCH
or in blank surprise. your hand"
was the gentle reply. you weighed
it with the sausages, and ! like to get
what I pay for"
A lank M%issourian walked into a
wonan's exchange in st. Louis. A
cantankerous middle-aged woman
stepped up and asked him what he
wanted. BE this the woman's ex-
changer" he inquired. cit u.s." h
snapped. "An' be We the woman?" he
persisted. 1T ami" she replied In no
gentler tones He looked thought
fully, transferred his tobacco from
one cheek to the other, edged toward
the door. then remarked casually!
"Wel, I reckon I'll keep Sal!'
A young man not particularly en-
tertaining was monopolizing the at
tention Of a pretty d%ebutante with a
lot of uninteresting conversation.
"Now. my broher," he remarked in
the course of a dissertation on his
family, lis just h opposite Of me in
every respect. Do know my broth
err"
NO" the debutante replied. de-
murely. "but I should like to-"
W 1rishmen were working on the
roof of a building one day when one
made a misstep and fell to the
ground; the other leaned ove and
called: Are We dead or alive, Nike"
I'm alive" said Mike. feebly. Sure.
Yer ye b sg $ a liza lisr IL I don't know :%., The ether
I must be Dead said Mike, 'for ye
would never dare to call me a liar IL
I was alive"
The old gentleman in his heart did
not object to the young gentleman as
a son-in-law, but he liked to raise OBJ
jections. and then reach an agreement
as though comforting a favor. When
the young man called he was ready
for him.
49," he interrupted hercely, almost
before the sutton could commence.
you want me to let you marry my
daughter. do you?"
The young man very coolly re-
sponded: -,
II didn't say so. did II"
The old gentleman gasped:
But you were going to say so!'
who told you'll WASP" inquired the
applicant, seeing his advantage.
But you want me to let you marry
her. don't you?"
mo-" exclaimed the old gentleman.
almost falling of the chair.
That's what I said"
Then what the mischief do you
want?"
= want syon to give your consent
replied the youth, pleasantly. 81 am
going to marry her anyhow, but We
thought your consent wouldn't BIO .
bad thing as Gstart.pp
It tookithe old gentleman . minute
lt~osreaitses the situation. When he did
he put out his hand.
ssh&ke hands. my boy" said he.
Shake hands ma boyss..s said he, 1--WE
been, looking for saOn-in-lAw with
some pluck shout him. ana I'm sure
you'll. d. hrst-class.:s
Max Ritten seowpship aaesGsor sf
Pigeon. township.A evansville. tells fhis
ionA.S j.. @
aays you d doE7ssasksd : spseial
fAx.Aasselors0faNh Evansville Womaa.
Mi, :, = vas tho voYaan,s ansgvof.
hon rom the kitchAn came saBoV.
01ss;grufkssEgfu ~ Ag n
that l. pour kittsa9" asAal
the sssssles.