Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1917-12-27
SATAN'S RESIGNATION
Indicates, in Favor Of Kaiser VIII
liam-1 kinks He'll Needs . Real
Ruler.

Louis Syberkrop, of Creston, Iowa
has acquired much fame in recent
weeks rs author OF satire on kai-
ser Wilhelm.
Requests have come to him from
Tam1lty, Secretary Daniels arr"
Roosevelt, and people in every state
Of the Union and in Canada, asking
for copies Of Mr.. Syberkrop's article.
"Ottumwa, Iowa. The Internal Re-
eion.'
$40 Wilhelm Won Hohenzollern, King
OF Prussia, Emperor Of All Ger
many and Envoy Extraordinary OF
Almighty God:
MY dear Wilhelm:
4 can call you by the fami'i:r
name for l have always been very
close TO you, much closer than you
could cvel. know. From the time that
vou were yet an undeveloped being
in YOUR mothers womb | have shaped
your destiny for my OWN purpose
"In the days OF Rome / created q
roueh,teck known III history as Nero;
nc was q vulgar character and suited
my purpose at that particular time.
In these modern days a classic de-
mon and efficient supernatural was
needed. and as I know the Hohen-
zollern blood, l picked you as my
special instrument to place on eartn
IN annex OF he'll.
Il gave you abnormal ambition,
likewise M over supply Of egotlsn,
that you might discover your own
failings, ! twisted your mind TO that
of a mad man with certain normal
tendencies to carry you by, 4. most
dangerous character placed in your
power: I gave sou the power Of a
hypnotist and a certain magnetic
force that you might sway your peo-
pie. am responsible for the deform-
cd arm that hangs helpless on your
left for your crippled condition en-
bitters your life and destroves all
noble impulses that might otherwise
cause me anxiety, but your strocs
sword arm is driven by your ambition
that souelches all sentiment and pity;
! placed in your soul deep hatred
for all things English, for Of all ma
items on earth I hate England most:
wherever England plants her flag
she brings order out Of chaos and tae
hatred Cross follows the Union Jack:
under her rule wild tribes become til
lers OF the soil and in due time prac-
teal citizens: she is the great civil.
zer of the globe and I hate her. !
planted in your soul cruel hatre'
of your mother because she was Eng
fish, and left my good friend BIS
mark to fan the flame l had
kindled. Recent history proves nv
work was well done. It broke your
roval mothers heart. but I gained
my purpose
The Inherited disease Of the Hohen'
/; zollerns killed your father, just as
it will kill you, and you became the
ruler Of Germany and tool OF mine
sooner than I expected.
ITO assist you and farther hasten
my work, ] sent you three evil spirits,
Neitzsche, Treitske and later Bern
hardl, whose teachings infamed the
youths of Germany who in good time
would be willing and loyal subjects,
and eager to spill their blood and pull
Your chestnuts, yours and mine; The
spell has been perfect-you cast
your ambitious eyes toward the Medi-
terranean, Egypt. India and the Oar
danel!es and you begun your great
railway to Bagdad, but the ambitious
archduke and his more ambitious wife
stood in your way. It was then that
| sewed the seed in your heart that
blossomed into the assassination OF
the duke and his wife, and all hell
smiled when it saw how eleverly you
saddled the crime onto Serbia. saw
you set sail for the fjords Of Norway
and knew how you would prove an
abb. How cleverly done, so much
like your noble grandfather who also,
secured an assassin to remove old
King Frederick, of Denmark, and
later robbed that county Of two more
provinces that gave Germany an cp-
portunity to become naval power
Murder is dirty work, but it takes