South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1917-06-03
Instructive Courtesy
By Y. p. Babcock.

the instinct of courtesy? If So
and there are many evidences such
is the case-what has brought il
about, and how shall the instinct be
saved from total extinction?
Instruction courtesy may, I think.
be defined as the antithesis of stud
important The latter being mere
~ an acquired trait, is subject TO
lapses of activity. Possession of the
former makes il impossible for a
man ever TO violate the law on
which rests his title a gallant gen
tleman."
Or, to put il another way, real
gentleman is and must Of necessity
be instinctively courteous.
The lifting of ones hat 10 a wom-
an against whom one has been push
ed accidentally in a passing throng.
or 10 an elderly stranger who has
asked direction TO some particular
locality, is more often a manifesto
ton of instructive courtesy than a
conscious act of politeness. The
hand goes automatically TO the hat,
for did its owner pause an instant to
reflect, he would realize that his &C
ton had faint chance of being OBJ
served either by the hurrying wOm
an or the perturbed stranger, and
hence could have no value as an as
set Of politeness.
It is clear that the habit Of uni
form courtesy, which we are pleased
10 call instructive. could never have
been acquired in an atmosphere for
eign to its recognition or unstimula-
tive Of its growth. Does not such an
atmosphere more generally pervade
American homes today than it did in
the former generations? Is it not
essentially the atmosphere alike Of
business office and ballroom
"Oh! yes" says the modern girl,
II grant you the young man of to-
day is less chivalrously attentive
than his prototype, but we don't
mind it. In fact, we rather like it,
since it places us more upon an
equality"
Now this may be all very we'll for
the girls but 1 am sure it is not at
all we'll for the boys. If a lad is not
permitted TO treasure the-suppOse
we call il "iIlusion"-that a lassie is
built of a little finer clay than him
self, what is TO prevent his becOm-
ing a more selfish creature even
than he naturally is? He has all
along known that-he being the
stronger-she couldn't force him to
give her the first drink out of the
bucket or the largest share of the
apple. and now that he is taught she
is no longer deserving of those privi-
Ieges. why accord them TO her?
II don't carev' says the girl, but
in that very expression she writes
an epitaph upon her fitness to be the
mother of a boy.
Courtesy toward women" is not
intended as a mere veneer for man.
i. should be ingrained at every stage
OF his development 1t is essential
to his growth, morally and spiritual
ly.
Perhaps it is from among those
girls who say Il don't care" when
treated boorishly by young men that
the type of mother I frequently see
i'm street cars is developed.
One of such. with two sons about
eight and 10 years old, respectively,
occupied three seats in a crowded
car L CHANGED to be in the other
afternoon. Both boys were chewing
gum. which added an element Of
distortion TO the otherwise cOmplac-
ent manner in which they regarded
/ a woman. old enough TO be their
| grandmother, who chung TO a strap
/ in the immediate foreground.
At first it seemed impossible the
/ bows mother could have observed
the older woman, but when the for
mer drew her bundles a little move
securely into her lap to prevent
their being knocked to the floor by
the latter. this faint hope of mine
that she was not determined upon
the humiliation Of every spark OF
decent courtesy in the breast of her
offspring vanished.
An elderly man on the opposite
side of the car presently yielded his
seat 10 the old woman, a spectacle
which those two gum chewing
embryonic gentlemen Of the United
States regarded as a diverting Incl
dent.
What social habits are likely "a
become instructive with those two
little male humans? Can't YOU ina
CINE them treading through life up
on the corns of others, utterly un-
conscious that either explanation OF
apology is required? Can't you sec
developing in them the germs of q
great anti-courtesy propaganda?
The strongest instinct Of man is
self-preservation which, after all, is
but a form Of selfshness, and to just
the extent that this instinct per
meates our social relations. court
esy-the essence of which is consid-
Grafton for Others-will be banished
Hence cultivation OF instructive
courtesy in the breasts Of the rising
generation is. I suggest. an Obliga-
ton society cannot afford 10 disre-
gard.