South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1917-07-25
HAPPENINGS IN AND ABOUT TOWN
And Now the River is Too
Shallow for Police Boat

II you want TO do an accidental
drowning below the dam. for the
love Of Mike do it on a day when
you know the food gates are open,
because otherwise the water is so
shallow that the police boat, which
draws as much as eight inches Of
water. cannot navigate and until the
water rises they can't go after your
body. They'll have 20 put the rudder
on. and fiji the oil cups. and put in
the seat boards, but that won't take
long-only they can't make the
thing go if the water is shallow
Yesterday. upon information
given out by Detective Diver. The
News-Times published a story 10 the
effect that the lower police boat
was not sea worthy. because the
annual coat of paint had not yet
been applied Great Indignation
followed at police headquarters and
Detective John Kuespert informed
the reporter that the boat was
painted. and perfectly capable Of
floating The reason the boat could
not be used. he said. was that the
engine in il was disconnected
Detective Diver, who is in charge
Of the craft. when questioned fol-
lowing the statement by the chief
said that the wrong impression had
been gained. The boat has been
painted, all but the top part, which
isn't i'm the water anyway. he said.
Then the charge that the engine
wasn't working was brought up.
What's the matter with the en-
gine?" asked the reporter.
Says Engine All Right.
THE engine? ?" echoed Detective
Diver Nothing at all Why, I
was running il last Sunday myself
while the boat was on the rack. 3"
But" was the objection, chief
Kuespert told me the engine wasn't
working. and that was why it was
impossible to use the boat last
Thursday when they discovered that
body down the river"
We'll, | know the engine is in
perfect condition now" declared the
detective. Chief of Police Kerr,
who was sitting nearby, confirmed
the statement
we had that engine i'm the shop
three days, while they had the boat
upside down, painting it," he said.
1T certainly should be in good con-
dition."
Just at this psychological moment
Chief Kuespert entered the room.
What d'yu mean. telling me the
boat won't run on account Of the
engine ." he was asked. Detective
Diver tells me there's nothing at
all wrong with it,"
"Oh. he does? Well. you misun-
derstood me- meant that last
Thursday. when the coroner called.
il was out Of order"
OH" said the reporter.
Anyway" declared all three
Chief Kerr. Chief Kuespert, and
Detective Diver-''we can't run the
boat because the water is too shall
low. Why. down there by the Tay-
lor st. sewer YOU can wade across
the river easy"
We'll. what I want to know is. IS
the boat all right now?'
'Yesr-this was unanimous.
The only trouble, then, is that
the water is too shallow"
That's il. Do you want 10 go
down 10 the boat house and see q?
I'll take you down" volunteered
Diver.
Sure"
Accordingly. the party left the
city hall and went Leeper park
ward on the way various reminis-
cences as to previous adventures OF
the police boat on the river were re-
Iated-which tended 10 get the re-
porter into a friendly attitude.
Arriving at the river bank. the
first remark on the part Of Detec-
tive Diver was, My, but the rivers
high today"
yes" agreed his chief. That's
because the gates up at the dam are
open. The factories make a lot Of