The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1917-08-10
Called conquerine Heroes

people waving their hats and cheer
ing.
Called Conquering Heroes
Then the Centerville Silver Cornet
Band began to play, See the Conquer
ing Hero Comes!" Eight little girls
in white began to strew flowers in the
pathway Of the military celebrities.
Next they had to stand still while
Cap Gibbs made a speech to them.
He never had been in the army. but
he owned the first steam threshing
machine ever seen in the country, so
that made him a captain. He had a
red, white and blue sash Topped
around himself and he barked in a
loud voice.
"He told the boys that they had
written their names on the scroll OF
fame alongside of Napoleon Bonaparte
and George Washington and q. s.
Grant
Toasted Like Kings.
Escorted by the Daughters OF the
Revolution, the boys then marched to
X. P. Hall where they were put at the
head of long table and served with
fried chicken, veal loaf. deviled eggs,
preserved watermelon, potato salad.
cottage cheese, dill pickles. grape Jelly,
soda biscuit, stuffed pepers. lemonade,
hickory nut cake, cookies, lemon pie,
ham, macaroons. New York ice cream,
peppermint waters and coffee. While
they were feeding the Sons of Vet
erans' quartet stood on the rostrum in
close harmony formation and sang,
TArN~hf Tnutiro Tnni0hf
Tenting on the Old Camp Ground"
cat the very first opportunity Yves
motioned to Schuyler and led him to a
little room off at one side--a place
where they kept the coal scuttles and
broons and such. He closed the door
and said. Say, Schuy, what the hell
is all this about? Do they know that
we're just couple Of privates.'
"'You are wrong said Schuyler.
AS near as can find out, we are a
couple of heroes
"Co you think you're a hero? ask
ed Yves.
"'No matter what l think, replied
Schuyler, I'm going to let them have
their own way. / may want to run for
sheriff some day
Don't Deny You're a Hero.
Young gentlemen, want you to
draw this lesson from what happened
nearly twentyyears ago. If any one
calls you hero, don't deny it.
If distinguished visitor put the
laurel wreath on your sunburned brow.
be polite and. in the vernacular, leave
it lay
IF fail to pass you the usual conf
pliments. it is not because you are un-
deserving, but because the English
language contains only 100000 words
and most of them already have been
used in trying to convince soldiers that
they are patriots.
They don't need to be convinced
They admit. l will not tell you that
you are heroes. You have been given
assurances to that effect by some Of
your distinguished guests and, of
course, you don't dare to contradict a
guest.
Won't Spoil Gen. Glenn.
II shall refrain from eulogizing Gen
Glenn. He is good man but highly
susceptible to flattery and we might
spoil him.
Il will play safe. I will give advice
to the young. After a man gets past
80 the best thing he does is to issue In
structions. II he got his money by
committing burglary and has got the
govt in both feet and plays poker three
nights week, he writes al article for
the paper and tells young men to be
homes and frugal, to guard their
health. practice moderation In eating
and drinking and never speculate.
1.-THE most helpful advice for young
people is condensed into morals, max.
inns and proverbs. "A bird in the hand
is worth two in the bush Great stuff!
If you had a bird in the hand you