davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Evening star., 1917-09-18

The man with coal bucket and fire
shovel is now hoping that theory and
practice in price regulation will yoke
up together and pull steady.
Evening star., 1917-09-18
SHOOTING STARS.
BY PHILANDER JOHNSON.
Getting By.

Getting By.
"Was your wife's party formal af-
fairi"
"Very," replied Mr.. Cumro1. 1--WE had
a very particular butler who didn't like
my looks. knew he wouldn't believe
me if I told him I was the owner of the
house."
"How did you get in?"
II told him I was one of my wife's
relations"
Evening star., 1917-09-18
A Spectator.

Sumpins gineter happen
l dunno jes' whut it is.
Sumpin' will be drappin'
Cause dem soldier boys means biz
l seen 'em all a-drillin'
An a-lookin' brave an strong.
De sight, it was SO thrillin'
Dat l had to drill along. /
hear dem rifles rattle
Wifi most convincin' tone.
rs dreamin' bout battle
An rifle of my own.
My footsteps, dey is tappin'
To de music of de band.
Sumpin's gineter happen
An guess Pll be on hand.
Evening star., 1917-09-18
The Social Side of Hyqiene.

Society as rule is generally careful about
.ne & state OF Its health. and it is apt to make
ventives. Germcides and antiseptics are in
Guided in this class. but the greatest care
should be exercised in using any which contains
poIsons, unless prescribed by Il physician.
By reason of its absolute safety and its
penenclal results, physicians have strongly
recommended Tyree's Antiseptic Powder This
preparation appears to occupy a unique position
asa rs a toiet and hygienic antiseptic and is being
niost IaForapiy commented upon by society. both
IN 'he states and abroad. The late Prof. W. NJ.
IfaE, pathologist to Providence Hospital and
microscopes TO the Army Medical Museum In
discussing the merits of this preparation. said:
rom the\ above and other experiments with
1Free Antiseptic Powder. conclude that 1t is
lis efficiency must be due to its peculiar mode
OF manufacture and its well balanced chemical
adJes'ment as well as the exceptional purity of
rs rs ihgred,en's 1t is sold in packages at DC,
soc and 81 by the manufacturers
}. 5. TYREE, Chemist, Inc,
Evening star., 1917-09-18
MYTHOLOGY Outdone.

"Did you ever hear of the goose that
laid the golden egg"
"No," replied Farmer Corntossel;
"but I've got a bunch of turkeys that
reckon will be worth pretty near as
much in an investment way"
Evening star., 1917-09-18

Congress expects to adjourn in Octo-
ber Opinions will differ as to whether
autumn melancholy will thus be en-
hanced or alleviated.
Evening star., 1917-09-18
Peaceful Germans.
m the indianapolis News.

From the indianapolis News.
Despite the plea of the Germans that
they are the most peaceful of people and
that somebody else started the war.
trouble always seems to follow in any
country where bunch Of them get to-
gethsr.
Evening star., 1917-09-18

American colleges are feeling the eff
feet of the war in reduced attendance.
In this case the absentees are men of
whom the colleges may be proud.
Evening star., 1917-09-18

Military age in Germany now includes
boys who ought to be at their school
books in the morning and at their mar
bles in the afternoon.
Evening star., 1917-09-18

After all the shark scares and sub
marine scares the only thing the coast
summer resorts had to complain of was
the climate.
Evening star., 1917-09-18

Berlin will find that the editorial as
saults on the submarines are attacks
least to be feared
Evening star., 1917-09-18

II seafaring men insist on tattooine
themselves into picture books they
should at least present themselves as
editions requiring no e1purgation.
Evening star., 1917-09-18

Argentina has put a stop to German
wireless facilities. Another gentleman
who thought too little and talked too
much is responsible.
Evening star., 1917-09-18

The pedestal of the soap box orator
becomes more and more insecure as the
demand for kindling increases.
Evening star., 1917-09-18

The U. s. A, once known as the most
extravagant nation on earth, promises
to become the most scientifically eco
nomica1
Evening star., 1917-09-18
Darwin Disputed.

"Do you believe in the survival of the
fttest?'
NO." replied Miss Cayenne. when
several men call on the same evening,
the greatest bore is always the last to
90 home"
Evening star., 1917-09-18
Doomed.

"Should old acquaintance be forgot 2'
AS sure as you are born,
Forgetfulness will be his lot
If he's John Barleycorn
Evening star., 1917-09-18

Berlin editors are glad that quotation
"the pen is mightier than the sword"
was not written in the German language.
Evening star., 1917-09-18

Kerensky will take no vacation in
order to go on honeymoon trip.
Evening star., 1917-09-18

An invasion Of Russia is not difficult
% start. The finish is another matter.
Evening star., 1917-05-27
Protect the Gardens!

In these days Of food stress it is the
duty of every one, old and young, to re-
spect the small gardens that are being
maintained throughout the city. Fri
day in the Juvenile Court two boys
were found guilty of depredations on
one Of the school gardens, and were SEN
fenced to make good the damage in
fiicted by them and required to earn the
money In some way to recompense their
parents for the fines imposed. II they
do not comply with the requirements of
the court they will be sent to National
Training School.
It is important that this fact be wide
" known to make plain that the court
viii protect the owners and keepers of
gardens. Many small depredations have
been committed, mostly by boys of a
mischievous nature. Perhaps others may
be suffered by the garden owners later
when the crops are advanced. The
courts should in all cases, as in this
which has just been disposed Of by Judge
Latimer. uphold the property rights Of
the gardeners by imposing fines, and ii
necessary imprisonment sentences, upon
all who maliciousiy destroy or steal the
fruits of these tracts. A respect fol
property rights should be inherent in
all, but evidently severe lessons are
needed in some cases.
Evening star., 1917-05-27
The House.

soiae peTsous are denouncins the
House. Others are pitying it. Poor old
House, Once SO powerful. Now SO I'M
potent. Once the eynosure of all eyes
wen important legislation was in the
making. Now the object OF mild curl
"sitv. Real inreIest is awakened only
when the Senate has business in hand.
Nobody expects the House to do more
titan cut out something in the rough for
the Senate or a conference committee to
put into finished shape. And so on.
In politics We must always allow for
cxasserations. There are exaggerations
i'll this sort of talk about the House. 1t
is not nearly so poorly off as its critics
describe. On occasions, when it rouses
and gets into its stride, it is still a
husky and forceful body.
And yet, it must be admitted that. in
the matter of popular interest, the House
has of late years been losing to the Sen
ate. The Senate has been oftener in
the picture. It has been doing some
notable things. Some very stirring epi-
sodes have been staged in its chamber.
Some filibusters, with far-reaehing eff
feets, have been conducted there. All
the successful fights on pork have
been waged there. In many things the
Senate has shown high quality for eour-
age, ability and general legislative re-
sources.
The House is itself responsible for
whatever loss of prestige it has sus-
tanned. In curtailing the powers and
importance of the Speaker, reducing him
to the proportions Of presiding officer
only. and in limiting debate too often
and too radically, thereby giving coun-
tenanee to the charge from the outside
that members wasted time with their
tongues, it inflicted injury upon itself.
The wonder is that the House does not
resume its old form. There never was
a car in the Speakers chair. Randall,
and Reed, and Crisp, and Cannon knew
how to handle gavel and promote bust
ness, but none was a tyrant in Office.
Under all of then, excellent legislative
results were obtained, and wide interest
in House proceedings maintained. There
was some denunciation, but no pityiug,
of that body in the public comment. The
Speaker should again be the second Off
Ger in influence under the government,
and have full scope for the exercise Of
talents associable with his place.
Evening star., 1917-05-27

ono Of those long polysyilables thst
mean many things all together and the
most accurate translation Of which 10
according to plan" II town ID evae.
uated It has been according to pisn. II
trenches are abandoned it 10 likewise
according to plan. If . retreat is ac-
complished over a long distance it is
also according to plan. Indeed, nothing
happens jim the German ranks that is
not according to plan. With that won
derful efficiency which is the boast Of
the Germans themselves and the object
Of general admiration, every possible
contingency has apparently been antici-
pated and provided for in the form Of a
plan. Doubtless there is a plan for
every move of retreat clear back to the
German boundary, and even beyond.
Probably If the British and French put
forth some wholly new engine Of war
it would be received and possibly coun-
tered according to plan long since
framed. There must be something sooth-
ing to the German nerves in the long
word that means according to plan,"
whatever the distance of the withdrawal
Of Teutonic troops. The thought is
probably encouraged by, the phrase that
the high command has deep scheme
whereby every allied advance is to be
turned to the advantage of the German
army sooner OF later. It is the "plan"
to fall back, and, therefore, it must be
right.
Evening star., 1917-05-27
Training and the War.

In Idaho there is protest against sena-
tor Borahs announcement that he will
retire from Office at the close of his
present term two years hence He has
been serving the state so we'll, the peo-
pie would keep him in commission
longer. Representative Smith of that
state says on the subject:
"While Senator BorAh has made great
sacrifices already, it is hoped that he
may feel that the interest of his eoun-
try in these years Of turmoil and un-
certainty - to the future is entitled to
first ciaim on his time and great intel
lectr
When Representative Gardner's resig-
nation was announced at home much re-
gret was expressed by the people of the
district. he had not taken them into his
confidence. Had they known his inten-
tioa they would have urged him to re-
main in Congress, where he had been
serving them satisfactorily for many
ye9s.
Nsw that tbs psyulstisnl il on tbs eve
Evening star., 1917-05-27
According to Plan"

The German language is regarded by
those who use 1t as the most scientific
system Of speech in the world. It is
built on the solid principle of efficiency.
Every part of every word-and the aver
age German word has many pafts-has
a definite meaning. It is somewhat like
the Chinese biography. 1t is claimed
that as a result the German language is
most flexible and can express most deli
cately every conceivable shade Of mean
ing. This quality has been exception
ally useful in the war, for the official
explanation department of the govern
ment, from which issue the bulletins of
military happenings, has had some diff
cult tasks to perform. It has been nee
essary to tell of good many things
positively distressing to the high COM
mand in way to be if not actually en-
couraging to the people at least not dis
couraging to them. Ever since the big
push began on the Somme front little
less than year ago the bulletins issued
in Berlin have been marvels of adroit-
ness. Tbs favorite expression has been
Evening star., 1917-05-27

Of being sorted out for public service,
senators and representatives. should con-
slider their own cases and sort them
selves out. Men for the army or the
navy have to be trained for their tasks.
Likewise men for the farms, the fac
tories, the mines, the railroads and for
other civil employments.
Likewise statesmen. They, too, have
to be trained. Their work is not easy,
as many men who have taken it up have
discovered.
When trained, a man does well to
stick to the work for which he has been
trained. Not only when war is on, but
at all times, competency counts. 1t in
creases the happiness of those employed,
and at the same time contributes to the
general comfort and welfare.
When preparations were afoot for the
war with Spain, some Of his old friends
whom he had commissioned for the army
called to say goodbye to President Nc
Kinley. "Boys," he said, in soldier fash
ion-he had been soldier himself when
young-"I wish could 60 with you. As
compared with your work mine is go
ing to be humdrum. But here j am, and
here must stay. Good luck; and when
you return-and hope you do return
come and tell me all about it."
As compared with army life, congress
sional life is going to be humdrum while
the war lasts. The work will be prosy.
But it will. be most important, and must
be done. Men who know how are the
ones to do it. The trained legislator
has as patriotic a duty to perform just
now, and may continue to have for some
time vet. as the trained soldier OF sailor.
Evening star., 1917-05-27
Volunteering and Selection.

Young man, over twenty-one and un-
der thirty-one, do not regard "conscrip-
ton under the selective draft law as a
disgrace! There is no stigma attaching
to the draft. Everybody is on the same
footing. IF there is an opportunity to
go forth before the draft, into line Of
service that is particularly attractive
and congeniai, and your going will not
disrupt affairs seriously, enlist ahead Of
the draft. But do not enlist now merely
because you think there is discredit in
waiting for the regular process Of Sc
lection.
The sclective draft system is based
upon the principle of equal opportunity
for all to serve the country. It is the
most democratic method of raising an
army. 1t puts everybody on the same
basis. 1t makes for universal chance
No man who waits to register and then
to be selected for service can be con-
sidered as lacking i'll patriotism. He is
doing his duty as the country commands.
The selected man, though named by
chance, is doing that for which he is
deemed best fitted. If he is better fitted
to remain at home and work in factory
or on the farm or in an Office he will
not be sent to the ranks of the fighters.
A higher judgment than his own will de-
termine this question for him.
There is some danger that the men
who, from fear Of the thought of slack-
ing. or from mistaken notion that
there is a stigma in being drafted, en-
list in one service or another may be
dislocating the industrial system of the
country more than is necessary. Yet there
is need of recruits now. The Army and
Navy and Marine Corps and the Ma
tional Guard require men. Those who
feel impelled to offer their services in
advance of the draft should do so only
after consultation and should never do
SO merely out Of shame Of the posi-
bility of being taken by selection.
Evening star., 1917-05-27
From the chicsHso Post.

From the Chicago Post.
Our navy is on the firing line.
The fact lends final proof OF the jus.
tfce of the naval recruiting cry. The
navy drst!"
From the Boston Transcript.
Nothing but hearty approval of the
promised sending OF PershinG and his
regulars can possibly be given. Gen.
Pershing is an excellent and a tried
commander.
Prom ths Indianapolis News.
There IL reason to believe that the
marked decrease in the destruction Of
merchant vessels by submarines Is to
some extent due to the strengthening,
by the Americans, Of the forces fighting
the submarines.
From the Philadelphia Inquirer.
The President has acted wisely in an
nounciny that q division Of regulars
will be sent to France at the earliest
possible moment.
From tie Chasiesten News and Courier.
Cen. Psruhing didn't get Villa. but
nobody will hold that against him II
he gets HindenburE.
Evening star., 1917-05-27

woman to show OF how they can im-
prove that sorter fiSger with these new
braces they got"
We'll what's the matter with your
Amt that your style. all fisht9"
mo, maam. 1t amt! And what's
more, nobody dast pass remarks on me
after this. neither! The demonstrate
Of a sine. I've got good lines, 20 thsre'.
no excuse for clothes not lOolcin' good
on mo-providin' I'm careful"
You take It mighty easy consider'n
what you said about wantin' the
Il want the money, all rfght"-and
the worry lines peeped out agsin-''they
pay bone for every demonstration,
and there's three. Still. it's worth good
cash to get it direct from q real ex-
perter that you got good lines
AS they went on together. the bsck OF
the huge woman Strengthened with an
obviously new attempt at erectneos. ana
even her tread betokened . suddenly
acquired consciousness that when it
comes to figgers she could give ca,ds
and spades to. say. Cleopatra-providin
she was careful.
And, also. It made a right seod 1ftsls
showing Of what . few words o. en-
couragement will do.
= ::
A rickety old colored man had drawn
his team to a curbing to let the circus
go by. The equally old and rfckety
cart was caked with Maryland mud.
and the ancient mare flitched to 1t
stood with a detected patience thai,
somehow. implied humiliation at hav-
ing to force the season in a rakisli
horse bonnet that had once been blue
and red gingham trimmed with used
to-be white fringe.
A circus-watching person who hap
pened to stand next, and who knows a
gentleman when she sees one, asked
the old man if he reckoned his horse
knew she had on midsummer bonnet
on chilly spring day. And he chuck
led-as she knew he would. in the voice
of unstudied melody which nature Ia =
given to his race and which neither
time nor trouble can jangle:
"Yes'm. Suttin1y she knows she got
body's fool. Yes'm. Country Cider
knows she gotter bonnet on, an, fur
thermo'. she knows why-huh. huh.'
The person also knows a story when
that the mare had a rather queer
name
"welrum. we thinks Country Cider
got yehy fine name. 1t come outer
:, book: book, l don't know what II
some mouty Gurus folks inside. The
fust an fo'must one Of all OF 'em
called hissef lord-which is fnouty
scan louS for wum OF the nth to
name hisse'f after the Hebeniy Marster.
an I don't care who heahs me say SO.
lutheran this lord man he wanted to
mahy a young widdery lady name OF
Country Cider. But, law. man, she
took to her heels an run away with a
po' german. an'-that's how Miss Fan
come TO chrissen the ole mare, be-
cause she run away with her one time
when the two of 'em was coltish-an'
now little Miss Fan an all the res Of
. - 4t,A
pearly gates. an my fus' wife daid. an
my other not nigh the same comfort.
no ma 'am--an' me an Country Cider.
We JUS pokes along toguever. Much
a little dram
And the woman, having paid for her
thread Of yarn. wondered, as she
reeled it on a pad. if the pallid old
mares name could have started out
as Countess Ida.
MAMIE LANCASTER.
Evening star., 1917-05-27
AMERICANS AT THE FRONT!

From the Cleveland Plain Dealer.
The call of France is needed. An
American army will be dispatched to
the trenches of western Europe long
before the great national force can be
selected and trained.
From the Boston Globe.
Nothing in Washington affords more
occasion for optimism than that our
military leaders are determined to make
haste slowly. to profit by the plentiful
lessons Of tho past
From the Wheeling Register.
The decision that Gen. Pershing has
been ordered to leave Immediately
meets with the unanimous and enthu-
siastic approval OF the American peo-
pie. =
From the Chicago Tribune.
They may not be able to do a great
deal. being so few men in the great
armies of our allies. but they will do
the best that Americans can do Just
now, because they are the best men
America can furnish just now.
From the Chicago News.
PershinE is fighter who knows how.
Evening star., 1917-05-27
Give Every Man a Chance!

In short time men who have regis
tered as generally eligible for military
service will be drafted for duty and will
present themselves for physical exami-
nation. 1t is assured that under the
most liberal standard of recruiting many
of these men will be rejected. The ques-
tion arises whether that standard is not
too high, too rigid. Of course, it is nee
essary to secure an army Of physically
fit men, men with sound organs and of
good frame, men capable Immediately
of withstanding hardships. But if the
old standard is strictly applied, if men
are rejected for what may be regarded
as technical physical faults, many will
be turned back who could with very lit
tie trouble and in a very short time be
made into the best of material for mill
tary service.
It has been repeatedly proved that
with systematic care for the teeth and
the digestion most Of the men who are
rejected at the American recruiting sta
tions could in short order be put into
acceptable shape for military duty. One
of the strongest arguments for univer-
sal military training is that it would
conserve the health of the nation by
making every man not afflicted with in
durable organic disease sound and fit.
Great numbers of cases are on record
of young men who have gone into train
ing under military conditions suffering
from disabilities that would cause their
immediate rejection at the recruiting
stations and have in few weeks after
systematic treatment been made into
perfect physical specimens.
As people VIC are now greatly con-
cerned over the question of conserva-
tion. We are practicing food econo-
mics and trying to check up on forest
and fuel wastes. But we are doing COM
paratively little in the matter of con-
serving humanity. And right now there
is an opportunity to conduct conserya-
tion work on an immense scale. Let
there, be two classes of acceptances for
military service, those physically fit for
immediate duty and those requiring
remedial attention. Let there be pro-
bationary period for those who are not
at once ready to go into the ranks. Util-
ize these men who are brought into the
service under the new law, not neees-
sarily to send them forth as soldiers to
fight in France or elsewhere. but at least
at the end Of the war to send them back
into the civilian ranks better physically
and probably better morally. If these
men are rejected as physically unfit they
will remain unfit. Give them a chancei