The sun., 1917-05-27

through tn0 p4Dom0uC- buG0f Wa0 al
Joy at the prospect Of having q real
bed to sleep in ana tho sight Of my
empty little room was q good deal Of
q Jolt
"-You said you'd lodge met no said.
Where's your bedr
"T didn't tell you I had a bed,'
explained This Is a studio
"Well. we made pillows out OF the
books and gave a fair imitation Of
slumber. And II was n profitable ex-
perience after all. For Butler wrote
charming little story about it. a
whimsical description of how Poe and
De Maupassant and the rest OF our
pillows had come to us and told us
how they too had been up against II; (;
how they too had gone hungry and
been homeless and yet had found life
full of wonderful things. II was a de-
lightful story. lie sold II for so and
he gave me $3.50 as my commission.
Those were great days. Ill never
forget an old washerwoman who used
to help me out occasionally. Swell
| friends Of my sister used to invite me
to various functions, and rs "A party
meant something good to eat | was
naturally keen TO go.
Unfortunately I had only one shirt
TO my back and II was rarely In a con-
dition that would cause me to shine In
society. My washerwoman friend had
n small stock of extra shirts, which
had not been claimed by their owners,
| and I discovered that IL could furnish
her a good laugh she'd come across
7 hn 1na Of Of ol, ,irty
$50 when I wanted TO go 10 a party
I'd start on a feverish hunt for new
story. or course that made me popu-
lar My worst enemies beamed on me
If I'd listen TO their pet Jokes. In their
joy at having n willing victim they'd
even invite me to eat or drink with
them. So I got my reward both going
and coming.
Yes, those were the days about
which I'd dream true IL l could. There
was the glamour and wonder OF youth
IN them. Lifo was game to us. Some
OF us lost the game. But those of us
who managed to live through it will
never forget It,"
What was your first appearance
on real stage?" I asked. Would
you dream true about that"
He thought moment
Yes. by George. I would. Il was
with my father. He and I were great
pals. My notion of being an artist
always amused him, but he let me
go my own way. Finally. though he
thought he'd try To cure ME of what
he called my silly idea and he per
suaded me to do a vaudeville sketch
with him.
I'VE opened down IN Coytesville
y. j. That was my theatrical debut
and ! made one Of tho biggest sensa
tlors in my career. watched my
father make up in his dressing room
Then ! went to mine and initiated
him as exactly as / could. His part
called for n big mustache. Mine
didn't; but l put one on Just the
same.
My father was always late getting
to theatre and this time was M
exception. So he didn't have a chance
10 inspect mo and to see what | hac
done with myself. He was alread,
on the stage when I appeared Tho
mustacho looked all right on him, OF
course. But with my small face, q
regular peanut face. was mustach
ioed up to the eyes and out to the
ears. He gave me one look Then he
said something that I've forgotten now
but 1t got a perfect roar from the
audience. Biggest hit I've ever made
II didn't take the stage any more
seriously In those days than a PUPPY
takes rubber shoe. Father gave me
up as n bad job, dramatically speak
Ing, and I returned to my artistic am.
bitions. My sister was responsible foi
my next appearance. She was playing
in Captain Jlnks' and wired me from
the road asking me II I'd like to take
Frank Byrne's part for a few nights.
"I was ready for anything tina,
promised a little fun. so | Joined the
company. My sister was nervous anC
anxious about how Id get along. but
! wasn't. I put on my uniform anc
went on as gayly as IL I'd been doinf
1t thousand nights and Just as sur,
OF myself
And then, when my cue came. m,
memory just fell into bottomless hole
didn't remember one word of m,
lines. Not letter! OF course ] ought
to have gone cold with fright. But II
seemed just huge joke to me. sait
anything that came into my head
We'll. now that we're all here. let,
get together.' That sort of thing, yo,
know.
"rhe rest of the company almos
passed away. But it was nuts for mo
At the close OF the act my sister al
ways took a curtain call. That nigh
| didn't give her chance. While tn,
I
over my fiasco l blithely stepped ou
and bowed my prettiest TO the audi
lence' Oh If could see myself doinl