The Butler weekly times., 1917-10-04
sun Y E4 MS
Gentle Folks. d
! appear before you
this August day u
October TO explain.

sSss3 sss4Ft OcIOOcr 10 SXplali
u i.ss' Last week l tol
you thst would only write you tw
II times month. But ! propose an
the editor disposes. Almost at til
last minute was sharply ordered I
get bizzy and hand in my cop,
Seems am very "rescherchi" and al
most indispensable. Hoping that thi
explanation will to some extent miti
gate my offense OF appearing thi
week, ! will proceed.
Our government is to experimen
with a poison gas OF dogs to find ou
IL it will kill the Germans. Now sa,
that's plumb foolish. Why not try
on the Germans first (and spare ou
dogs) and anyway poison tina
would kill dog probably wouldn'
have fatal effect on the Germans
nor on La Toilette.
Oh. yes. We brag about the Mis-
souri, mule (and justly SO too) but SC
far as real money value goes the Mis-
souri, hen has him beat as far as from
here to there and back. If you DOM
believe it (but you do) look up the
records of Biddy, the queen of the
barnyard.
have heard some wonderful music,
and it haunts me again and again
But the sweetest song l ever heard
was the song Of the laying hen.
They say there's music in Heaven
like the notes of grand Amen, but
no song so dear to my heart (that |
hear) as the song of the laying hen.
DO you know l think the reason
why the whale couldn't keep Jonah
in his innards any longer was that
Jonah was Bosche and a-relation of
Kaiser Bill.
And no wonder the whale got i'll by
the stomach. And say. there's good
many Jonahs runnin' around sort of
loose and promiscuous like (some Of
'em in Congress). They should be
heaved overheard same as Jonah (tl1e
first) was--only in their case good
swat with an axe) on the head
should be delivered so that in case
the whale spit 'em up they wouldn't
drift back home-alive. -
By golly, if l was out huntin' and
should run across the Kaiser and La
Toilette and only had one load left in
my gun. don't know which one Id
shoot. / think ! would try and get
'em in line and get 'em both at one
shot.
T'other day l saw this in a paper:
"How do you wear your clothes"
Now OF all the fool questions / ever
saw this takes the bun. Now any
body who knows me will tell you that
/ wear 'em just as long as possibly
can. Also every time / 60 out doors.
Once when I was boy wandered
away from home. Got out O. sight
Of the house and was lost. I trav-
eied for quite a spell and finally met
i man and asked him where l lived.
He replied II don't know son. I'm a
stranger in these parts. Heaven IS
my home and I'm only here on a
visit" Since then I've met a good
many. like him, far from home, visit
ing, and If Heaven is their home they
are blamed sight farther from home
than l was and stood about as mitch
chance of finding anyone who could
tell 'em where they live as did.
Think of it. lost and no one to tell
EN- the way home.
: Aha! At last a circus. Now may
J. Pluvius be good to MS. If there
Is anything on earth that will make
/ man. Tor woman) let the kids GO
hungry it's circus. I once knew
Df q family of poor folks, quite j
arge family. A circus was billed for
Iown and council was held to pro-
vide ways and means to see the show.
A vote was taken to decide if they
Ihould sell the cook stove and spend
lie money at the show. The vote
vas unanimous. The stove was sold.
rhe family saw the circus and cooked
" the fire place. Now, hope none
il yon will do that. just put potato
II al ear Of corn in your pocket. No
iced TO sell the stove this year.
Now folks, I positively will not
write you again for two weeks. I'll
&c editor wants to get some one. in
~ place let him 60 to it. He'llsbc
-.s