The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1917-12-08
WARNING TO GUESTS
Ake-Pots Plan Awful, Awful Recep-
ton for County Officials.

There will be a great and all-per-
vading sound of weepin' and wailin'
in the homes of many county officials
on the morning of December IS, for
the Ake-Pots OF the Ster-Boo clan
have laid elaborate plans for speed
ing the afore mentioned gentlemen on
their journey to Valhalla. And those
who undergo the fortunes in store for
Wednesday night may well expect to
eventually join the men of Thor and
Odin in the heaven of the Mortimer
for battle and fire and sack will be of
little consequence compared to the
fiendish suffering imposed by the AXE
Pots. The infant in the red-hot hands
of Baal, the victim of the Druids, and
the living sacrifice of the AZtecs to
the supreme Quetzal would not ex-
change places with the miserable vic
tins of the Ake-Pots. What is mere
death compared with the suffering of
the rack and the boot, and the red
hot iron shoe. Yea, verify verify, the
candidates of the Ake-Pots will long
rue the day when they subjected them
selves to the refined but ghoulish
cruelty of the local tribe of Ster-
Boo.
All the goats used in the ceremonial
have been brought in from the pas
lures of suculent grass and the mead
ow of new mown hay and for the past
month have been fed on nothing but
cactus and cockleburs. oh, yes, they
are wild enough to do their part with
vim and unholy joy. 1t is even rumor-
ed among those who know that many
of the tribe have become. so faint OF
heart that the new fortunes make their
calloused blood run cold, and the med
icine men and sachems of the tribe
are seriously thinking of putting them
to the torture to revive their cruelty
and foster a spirit of revenge on future
victims of the clan. George Godfrey
slarsc " a
longtoothed and slavery mouthed
congregation of ghouls and fiends has
been forcibly elected from the delib-
erations of the headmen on account OF
his growing soft heartedness and now
the usurpers are seriously considering
a speciaI horror for his particular en-
joyment And Moore wasn't so all
fired tame in his cruelty either. The
new initiatory rites are even unknown
to the officers of the tribe for fear OF
their interruption
Speaking of the awfulness of past in
itiations, it would seem that an the
horrors of a Hun invasion or Hall
fax fire will be play for babes and
children when placed in the balance
with the new rites and ceremonials
of the Ake-Pots. And the Ake-Pots
don't conduct their practices in secret.
either. They parade their victims on
the streets to lay the way for the Ro-
man holiday they so keenly enjoy.
WHY. instead of hiding themselves in
shame the Ster-Boo Clan has boldly
announced that they will parade their
victims on the streets of Topeka
promptly at 1880 on Wednesday and
invite all interested in taking last
look at the unfortunates to secure
place of vantage on the main drag of
the city to obtain a last view of the
county officials in the guise God gave
them. They will return from the in
itiation, if they do return, broken in
body and shattered in spirit, and for
ever afterward their voices will trem-
BILE and sink to a whisper at the mere
lention of the Ake-Pots of the Clan
of Ster-Boo.S Requiescat in pace.