Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1917-08-03
|Life'sProblems
Are Discussed
BY MRS. WILSON WOODROW.

A FEW years ago some lover of
~ statistics took the trouble to
investigate at just what stage
in the voyage of matrimony most of
the separations and divorces occur.
1 cannot at present recall the exact
figures, but know that the fifth year
stood pre-eminent in the list, and
that. too. by an overwhelming ma
jority.
That fatal, fifth year" of marriage,
as 1T has been called Then it is that
all the incompatibilities and diverg-
ences and irritations and antagonisms
seem to reach their climax, and either
culminate in the divorce courts, or
are forgiven and forgotten sQ that a
fresh start can be made. or else shade
of into that good-naturad tolerance
with which so many married people
regard each others foibles.
have many letters from women
who confide to me the various differ
ences which have arisen between
themselves and their husbands-dif-
ferences unimportant at first, but
which are now assuming proportions
which frighten them.
Here is one which is typical of a
large number: II was married at the
age of seventeen to a man of thirty
three. Ours was a real love affair
for almost two years. / have been
married five years now, have a boy of
three, and am a very happy woman.
My husband loves his child and adores
me. We are congenial and very sell
dom disagree except on one topic.
And that is money.
My husband claims that I am ex-
travagant, and 1 know that he is
wrong. During the five years of
our married life we have had some
very bad luck. Business reverses
seemed to be our lot. And when we
wouldn't have a dollar to look for
ward to, never complained In fact,
he never came home discouraged that
1 did not comfort him and plead with
him not to worry. More than once
urged him to let me look for a posi-
tion, but he would not hear that at
all. During all our discouragements
though. we were happy, and always
felt that If fortune ever smiled on
us our happiness would be complete.
Yet now that things look brighter,
and our love is as strong, perhaps
stronger, than it was during our hard
times. arguments crop up continually.
My husband says that when 1 see a
dollar L can't spend it quick enough.
And / reply that since I went so long
without things, mainly clothes, 1 want
now all the pretty things that a wom-
an of my age naturally Graves. Am
l wrong, and is my husband right?
Our happiness would be complete, il
only we could be enlightened so as
to reach an understanding on this
one subject"
This is a plain case of the fifth
year." and that my correspondent
should be having unsettled weather
prising thing. What should be sur
| prising would be for me or any other
outsider to succeed in Strengthening
out a marriage tangle. That can only
be done by an angel from heaven en-
dowed with a conscience, or the two
people directly concerned.
But just as an abstract problem in
human relations. the case is interest
ing. Here is an ideal union, husband
and wife are devoted to each other,
their mutual love has survived dis
couragement and reverses, and is now
further cemented by the child which
has come to them. More than that,
their lean years are apparently over.
and they are looking forward to the
fat years of plenty
Yet into their Eden has crawled
that same old serpent on crutches-
the dollar sign-who still alternately
woos and crushes the sons and daugh-
ters of men.
With every blessing that humanity
seeks-health, love, the rounded life
and prosperity-these two people find
time to squabble over a few miserable
pennies. Well, it all goes to prove
that you can't have everything, and
that, no matter how the gods dover
you, no one is satisfied.
Money! Money! The basis of nine
tenths of all the disagreements in the
world. The pocketbook certainly
marks the line where friendship
ceases But there Is more in this
matter than a mere wrangle about
money. The money question is SIM
ply the outward and visible sign of
an inner dissimilarity of nature.
Temperamentally. it is beyond this
mans power to appreciate his wife's
point of view; temperamentally 1t is
| impossible for her to understand his.
He has a masculine lack of COM
| prehension of a woman's love of pret-
! ty clothes; moreover. he is thirty
eight; and at thirty-eight one grows
cautious, especially when one has seen
how swiftly the winds of fortune veer
and how persistently they can blow
! from an adverse corner.
She is improYident twenty-five. taxi
ing no thought of the morrow, intent
only on gathering her roses while
she may. She is an ingrained op-