Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1917-07-09
JARs AND JTBES

y =
Charles Leedy IN Youngstown Fele-
gram1-
An ice cream suit is me LOT walk
ing in. but it soon loses its grace ana
beauty when one is Obliged to lounge
about or sit down in it.
The high price of potatoes does not
seem to have had any material effect
on the amount of salad used during
/ the picnic season.
The man who insists on keeping his
! feet crossed I'm the street car IS an
Undesirable citizen without question
especially If he wears white shoes
that shed powdered chalk
What's become Of the oId-fasb5oned
boy who used TO think nothing OF
patched trousers2
The young man who used TO court
/ his girl in q red-wheeied buggy IS now
running q touring car with one mana
and taking chances.
The weeds in the garden take no
vacation
Fifty. cent baircuts threaten to drive
] some men to the clippers.
/ The only practical joker worth
/ while IS the one who gets money for
I his product
/ A large strawberry crop has con-
+ trIbuted its quota of cheer and started
1.-The consumer toward visions Of bet
tier days and brighter prospects.
/ Nearly every year the convention Of
/ the newspaper hum0rists conflicts
with that Of the uudertakers, which
makes it almost impossible for pass
I ing observer TO pick ont the delegates
The limit has not yet beeu reached
in summer resort amusement devices
IF the present trend keeps up. some
50 Fafs g. !. E1F-a
with d device which viii scramble up
the patrons like a mammoth lemon
AIDE shaker
Rubber tires for The edges Of straw
hats might keep them from barking
peoples sbIns and also save the hats
from skidding uudujy-
Many a chicken is pigeou-toad.
Our idea Of nothing worth doing lis
trying 10 iii an elephant with water
/ What's become of the old-fashiOned
man who used TO say "Ther amt q
thing in the paper2'
Some people lose their step
watching the "steppers.
a frightened burglar in q ne5ghbor-
ing town. left his shoes behind. Which
looks like new version Of the annual
story about the chicken thieves who
robbed poor widow and left in the
coop q purse with a roll of bills big
enough to choke tuba
LOVING CUPS
/ The loving cup is an article Of fur
uiture which can be made generally
useful by converting it into something
else. a good sized loving cup. with
the inscription carefully eradiCated
and painted with coarse paint makes
a fairly presentabIe lawn urn There
/ is always danger. however. unless the
painting is carefully done that the
deception will be discovered, and tie
| loving cup revealed in all its useless
ness Hammered down hv an expert
loving cup hammerer the vessel NAV
chatng dish Care should he taken.
! IN this event that none Of the cheese
be permitted TO lodge permanently in
/ the crevices or in the part which was
formerly the pedestal of the loving
cup. AS missile the loving cup is OF
little or no use on account of the fact
( that the handles are exceedingly uu-
reliable. Persons have been known 10
drink ont Of the loving cup, but Theses
have been uusophisticated individuals
who have taken it for granted that the
/ ornament was intended fer actual use.
+ Care should be used IN placing "a low
I ing cup on its manteI or in its nook A
fairly well developed Ioving cup. fall
ing from considerable height. and
f landing unrestTained1y on the pet corn
/ Of an innocent bystander, can occa.
+ sion ufterances which are entirely for
! eign TO anything that can i'm any way
/ be associated with or compared TO
. love. Trust them not.