Tulsa daily world. [volume] (Tulsa, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 1905-1919, 1917-11-25


An argument Is mighty queer.
On this you can depend,
For, tho 1t always has two Sides
1t never has an end.
minister. having attended confer.
,nce three or four days In Tulsa, ana
being engaged in the matter OF writing
4 letter to his wife at home. wrote In
part as follows: 80 and do you
know. my dear. l do so wish l had
made visit here before l Joined the
church,
Paw, may / ask one more ques-
tion7"
"Yes, son; only one more"
What Is unrequted affection 2"
tits where q candidate kisses all
the babies in the county and then is
defeated. Now shut up. want to
read"
Is That SO!
He sings: 81 would not live slway"
Does Oswald Christopher McTope;
And yet he spends five bucks day
For patent medicine and dope.
Luke McLuke.
81 am a soldier Of the cross.'
He sings, and 1t goes down
His wife and children know he Is
The crosseSt man In town.
Memphis Commercial Appeal.
"The cOnsecrated cross I'd bear
Till death should set me free
He sings, and tho he's not crosseyed
Yet a growing bear Is he.
A traveller was leaning out the
coach window eating sandwich
which he had bought from boy out
side. He gazed across the beautiful
valley and exclaimed Isn't this
NO. sir" said the boy; Its ham
Our Extra Special.
The halibut is thin, flat fish which
swims with one flat side upward. both
eyes being on the upper side. and the
"innards" sometimes on the right and
sometimes on the left side Of the fish.
He: What are you sore at Briggs
about?"
She: He said dressed pavonine."
He: What did he mean7"
She: II don't know. But got mad
anyway so I could forgive him II he
meant we'll"
Ham Says:
Some men wait until they are dead
to wear a headstone on top of them.
Others carry one around all their
lives.
You might get the idea that dropsy
has broken out all over town. But not
so-it's only getting so dadgummed
cold nowadays that union suits just
had to be pulled. on.
Safety First now includes wearing
q Liberty bond button to prevent be-
ing shot for an 1. w. w.
They say there was once an elevator
boy who went one whole day without
hearing anybody say, There's always
room for one more" All unreliable
statements begin with They Say.
Most women's idea Of heaven Is a
place where someone else does the
cooking and washes the dishes.
Isn't 1t good thing for some folks
that the county. assessor will not list
them for taxation on their own valua-
ton Of themselves.
1t is curious. but true, that white
horse always picks out a mudhole to
roll in.
II nobody lost in contests, how could
there be winnersf
What has become of the elderly
gentleman who accepted gratuities-
because he was too stuck up to draw
wages?
Rip Van Wrinkle slept twenty years
In a story. But even at that, some
June brides are just now waking up
from dreams to realize sad facts. -
To he happy Is to be healthy. To be
healthy Is to keep the mouth closed
and breath thru the nose. But not
many women desire to be healthy and
happy under those distressing circum.
stances.
Because a mans nose Is red may
not mean that he IL q slave to Demon
Rum. He may have accidentally side
swiped the drug store cheek on his
best girl.
Bankers have lots Of enemies be-
cause they insist on folks paying on
the date they signed up to pay down
Judging from advancing prices, q
man may be able to keep his New
Years no-smoke resolutions, unless he
can bum off his friends.
The main reason lots Of men won't
go to church IL because every time
they do they think somebody must
have put the preacher next to the de-
tails of some Of their meanness, since
he rings up 20 many bull's-eyes.
The Good Book tells of q man at
whom folks pointed and said, AHA:
Aha" Probably he was physician
who had a severe sick spell Of hia
very own,