The Bridgeport evening farmer., 1917-10-13

TN
the midst of a battle and with Fritz
the Frightful as an unwilling and
very much surprised listener
You know the dirty tricks they
played on US, or tried to play US, in
the Big Retreat. At every village
they evacuated they left all sorts of
trinkets lying about in the ruined
streets, helmets, watch chains, knives,
belts, and dear knows what else, all
scattered as If they'd thrown every
thing from them in their hot haste
to escape being caught in the relent-
less British tide. OF course, we knew
all about these trinkets. Had we
picked up any of them, it would have
been a case of being blown to King
dom come.
. But to my story. A number of us
were following up, for the purpose of
clearing the dug-outs which Fritz had
left behind. We made all sorts of dis
Fcoveriesi in them, you may be sure,
besides the patches of skulking devils
hiding in corners, and only giving
in with a "Kamerad' when they saw
the game was up. Ane one Of the
discoveries we made nearly cost us our
lives.
We; had entered huge place, tun-
nelled deep down, strongly buttressed
with heavy beams, beautifully panel
led, and finely equipped with beds,
furniture, and even pictures. Oh,
quite luxurious place, assure you,
but the tit-bit of the whole outfit was
a handsome gramophone, set on a
Istand in a corner of the biggest room
in this burrow, and looking just as
innocent a thing as you ever clap
ped eyes on. So innocent and so in
wiling indeed, that one of the boys
was just about to une up when a
| warning shout rang out from our SER
geant. Z
| And we'll for us that the sergeant
| had all his wits about him. Going
over to the gramophone he made a
careful inspection. and sure enough
he found cunningly hidden though it
was, a thin wire. He traced it, and
the usual came to light, a fine fat
bomb away at the other end, suffi-
cient to have brought the whole place
/ about our ears. But that was not
ALL The records were piled all
around the gramophone stand, and
even some of them. had wires attach
i ed, too. Trust Fritz for attempting
the dirty when he's losing!
/ Of course, matters were soon put
right, and, as we were ar overtoy-
led. at the, marvellous escape we had
had, it was voted that we should have
a tune what time the rest of the
lplace was being explored, So the
lgramophone was. set agcing, and
there, in the midst Of the battlefield
we had the greatest concern you ever
heard from the operas
marches, and every jovial thing yor
I,could think of. Fancy a Hun gram.
i ophone playing during a British vic.
tory.
But the strangest part was yet tt
}come. We were not idle while the
lgramophone was going. That bis
burrow, with its corridors and rooms
took bit of cleaning up, and in the
i process what or whom should some
of the boys come across, but a part,
of Huns hiding in recess? The,
had evidently been too late to ge
4 clear, and they were nicely caught
Soon they were hurried into the mali
room where the gramophone was, ant
were told to keep quiet.
= Which they did.
Oh, they were the astounded men
. these Fritzies. They must hav,
known perfectly well about tina
& gramophone. SO judge of their sur
: prise when, instead of hearing tn
crash Of an explosion-from which
!. they themselves had every chance 0
, escaping-they heard the swee
$ twas to wipe us all out AS the must
issued forth there were no smile
from them. Their faces were study
The boys, although tragedy ha
been SO near, speedily forgot it al
and went about as eager as magpie
, hunting for things, but no NOR
, strange discoveries were made in tina
: part at least, and within a few min
utes what time the gramophon
: ground out it's music, Fritz and all hi
: works were cleared out. and the plac
: twas made habitable for it's new own
ers.
Has Fritz no humor? Well, I don
3 knowif he thinks it humorous to al
tach lives wires to gramophones, bu
2 personally think that kind of hu
Imor pretty crude, to say the least
! remember once hearing a caval
ryman tell a good story, though, of
batch of funny Fritzies who occupie
> trench not far from them Ho,
they knew that there were cavalr
there can't say, but one day the
stuck on the top of their parapet-
9 what you think?
9 A wooden horsei
t OF all the funny things imagina bl
9 1T looked the funniest, but there wa
:. an intended insult behind the ful
: and the cava1rymen didn't like it.
g A shot rang out, and the toy hors
: toppled over into Fritzie's trencl
q That wasn't the end of it, Ioweve