Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1917-11-13

/ to make to our SUBSCRIBERS TINS lsshe-
/ We have picked up more advertising
/ than we thought 1t was possible to get
/ for q single number of our paper
There has been great display Of in
ltelligence on the part OF our merchants.
/ They are no longer afraid to tell what
they have for sale, or to name their
prices. Well, you can see for yourself
THAT there has been a great curtailment
Of news. and in this connection We de-
sire to advise our subscribers that all
Of the deaths and births in our neigh
borhood have been postponed until
next week"
Il WAS amused at your sally at
the ministry when you said that the
one who was most popular with his
congregation was he who delivered the
briefest sermons" writes a Rock Is
land preacher. Il tell you this just
to prove TO you that we OF the cloth
| are only human, and that we enjoy
Jest the same as other mortals; al least
do You folks of the press, | have
noticed, are always so careful that
/ you might print a word at which We
ministers might take umbrage. l take
it that you have misjudged the temper
, of the average preacher. He wants 10
be a good fellow just as other men do
a In a rational sense; that is, he does F.,
. not wish to be understood as going
, about with his right hand on his chest (
y his face turned heavenward and afraid !
. to laugh lest he be condemned as too .
frivolous for his calling. / want to .
O thank you for your cunning rap.
, enjoyed il. It didn't hurt bit, as the
. dentist says. Come again. We preach
ers don't know it all. Perhaps some
4 OF us do talk too long, but | am proud /.
. to state that | never yet have put
worshiper asleep at his post, Ii you
discover any other weak points ia our
aTnor let US have both barrels We
ali ought to like it, In doing sc you
are doing more than you imagine in
= solving our problems
y ARE YOU saving those overeharge
4 receipts that you receive at the rail-
!, road ticket office when you take
u trio? Just as we thought Few are.
= The railroads knew you wouldn't
.. Some day you may wake up and learn
Il that the supreme court has ruled
= against the carriers and ordered that
:, the Illinois rate be restored TO the
- itwo-cent basis. Then you'll be mad
der than q wet hen. And the rail-
= roads will have the laugh on you. just
II as they usually TO-
ri TT appears that the fellow who has
e been committing all Of the small
le burglaries in Rock Island the past
D few weeks is dark, Perhaps that's
ID the reason you did not sec him when
a he was prowling in your home
N THE price Of FISH has advanced Sc
per cent The rise may keep going
= until the position OF the golden yari-
=. ETY. as home pet viii become dan
y. gerously insecure. Imagine a hungry
~ husband returning homo some even
y ing with his family gone and nothing
- in The food line in sight. Gazing upon
"a the bowl Of golden babies he might be
~ tempted to cook EN- up.
of LOCAL bakers assert they are con-
de fdeat that they will be treated to a
v square deal in any move inaugurated
S. by the government to obtain re-
Mt duced price of their product. It might
MS not be out. of place to suggest to the
in bakers that the surest means of their
he getting the consideration that they
OH are hoping for at the hands of the
on federal authorities IS to furnish a
a. square loaf. not wishing to intimate
do that they are not doing that little
thing now, but there is no harm in a
reminder that il would not be healthy
in for the trade as a whole if few OF
e- the brothers slipped and cheated
ne YOU may have noticed that many
\" OF our strongest men are inveterate
smokers They face trying tests daily
and as rule they conquer them, but
OF when their wives admonish them tc
all abandon the weed they do not hest
lot tate to confess their lack Of will power
ial to do So Which merely goes to prove
* that the strongest are not infrequent-
ly the weakest when you strike at the
spot where they live,
ties
,od ,,r,,-
ill ~ tiuiie@i iai government mas or
of the country be requisitioned. There
is d reason, probably
re-?
of THE manufacturers of leather ar,
le- to hold a love feast in Chicago Thu
rid month. Would it be fair to infer tina
the public will foot the bill?
lie" CARRANZA has recalled Seno
sge Burns as Mexican consul at New York
1t is reported that he will be sent t,
Buenos Aires to warm up that coun
. try's relations with his home govern
ment.
i We are tipped by Pansy this morn
ing that NJ. ", Slaughter is barbe
re in New York City and that Mr.. Needl
M is a tailor in Allentown. Pa
led
DON'T worry about the backward
on mess of winter simply because yo
have switched TO your heayies. You
OPP present discomfort doesn't cost yo
ANYTHING. When the thermometer be
in gins to register frigidity it will b
mn different, II you will permit your men
orv TO bark back to last winter an
ne, the snow piles YOU had to wrestle an
md the coal YOU had to shovel
Rs