Arizona republican., 1917-03-06
MR. HowELLs ApmonIsAEs

Writing in Harpers Magazine for March VII liam Dean Towels with characteristic urbantv calls the rising generation to account for its cruel abuse of the Kings English in the ensuing i'm aginary conversation between elderly gentleman the essayist-and sprishtly young lady who breezes n upon him with the words Well. hope she gets it.:
 Al this the essayist puts his hands to his ears and lamented. "0h, my dear child, my poor girl' Well. what is it now rncie2" she tenderly en- treated him. for she knew that she often afflicted him Dv her very common parlance and was always sorry for it. Have gotten something wrongy'
 Wrong, Don't you know that mustn't. that you really can't say. nope she gets it?'"
 What is the reason2 What would you say yourself?"
 What, but what all who speak English must say: T hope she may get it, or. I hope she will
 on Then saving I hope she gets it isn't English"
 And what is it, them"
 Tt is Yiddish"
 "Oh everybody says it"
 Do they? So much the for them and SO much the better for nobody who doesn't"
 Yes, but what's the use of worrying about these Of thnGs?"
 This sort Of things" he hissed
 T this suppose | shall try to speak English. you call it. out I away am afraid shall speak Yiddish again There is awful fascination in It. and after you have gotten the first strangness you don't notice it But couldn't you write a little paragraph. something. and but in all the things I oughtnt 10 say that I could memorize them and not say them?"
 The essayist smiled T had thought of some thing of the kind. Suppose try q little fable?
 Oh, splendid!" and she capped her hands rapturously together while he swiftlv wrote:
 There beautiful young girl who had been picked by all her acquaintances for her many brilliant and amiable qualities and for her devotion her uncle She knew how much he suf- fered over neologisms especially ugly ones. and she was always trying to shun them in her talk with him. By prodigious effort she had. she be- liCxsaI thought she would better get him to give her full list of them and then learn it by heart because really it seemed if he would end up sometime by going insane over them. Without such aid she would be able see how one phrase different than another and unless she wanted to have really i'll man her hands after she had gotten the list she herself memorize the hateful words with much ardor as would have done the most devoted daughter
 This s very sweet of you, Uncle" she said after she had read the parable twice Very sweet indeed though don't deserve the nice things you say of me. But now understand perfectly. ard I shall hurt your feelings again if vo" will only explain particularly about some of the neologisms you have marked I why you should despise such woman's word gotten and why, a strong Ally you must simply loathe over because it is translation of uber. think myself that picking rather unpleasantIy sug gests dressing fowls, and. after a little reflection anybody would rather not say different than would better. l suppose one would not like say ill man, much would dislike being so far out of the fashion gay sick man. But what is the matter with end up?'
 Nothing, except that t uncouthly oversays what end sufficiently says
 "oh, I see We'll that is all right then. but whats is the matter with going insane Why not say that?"
 Because 1t is getting too far away from the original ocuton going mad That was good, and going crazy naturally followed but when people become refined to wish mask the notion of madness. they obliged by fitness Of things to say become insane, and not go insane"