Omaha daily bee., 1917-06-10
Comb H0ney
By EDWARD BLACK.

The Picnic.
Once more the picnic season looms
Up with its joys and SORROWS, its sun
shine and rain. The picnic of today
does not seem to be what it was in
the long ago, when boiled ham was
within the reach OF all and the wild
wood had clientele of generous
numbers. But the picnic season goes
on forever, just like the old mill
stream and the gas meter at home,
Each year has its picnic season, and
each picnic season brings its new
hopes and joys and fears and
romances and lemonade.
There is the demonstrative miss
who screams when caterpillar
crawls down her back and there is the
chivalrous youth who plucks the
caterpillar from the young woman's
cuticle.
We will offer as exhibit A the
family picnic, that homogeneous di-
yertisement wherein filial, maternal,
paternal and conjugal devotions blend
INTO a harmonious entity at the be-
ginning of things. The best part OF
picnic is getting started and then eat
ing the provender. On the evening
before the day set for the picnic ma
gets the commissary ready and pa
does a lot of talking about what
great picnic engineer he is, Sister
Sue irons a lot of frocks for the girls,
and Willie ties up croquet set, ball
and bat, and few other articles used
during lucid moments at a picnic.
Sues steady young man joins the
family and ma admonishes Willie not
10 use any Of his uncouth language in
the presence OF the prospective SON.
in-law.
The start is made during the early
morn, with robins and larks singing
paeans OF praise in their matutinal
ecstacy. Sue and her beau lag in the
rear and Willie does a quick-step
with his burden. Pa jogs along, smok-
ing his pipe. The scene Of the pros
pective prandial frolic is reached and
pa remarks he is glad he did not have
to walk any farther.
After the lapse OF few hours,
Arthur, the 8-year-old, pierces the
woodland with this inquiry: "Say, ma,
when are we going to eatl" Sue and
her young man search Tor four-leat
clover. He carves heart with his
knife in a tree and cuts initials inside
of the heart, while she looks on and
sighs and sighs. /
"Do you remember the time met
you at a picnic and you were so at
tentive to me?" ma asks pa. i
Pa, reading the big league base ball
news, replies: "Pll say you have a
good memory"
'Well, just get busy here and help |
arrange the table. You've always got |
your face stuck into a paper when
want little help. You have half in
tercst in those children, Now, just
make the lemonade" says ma.
II don't know what woman suffrage |
is bringing us to- is pas continuation
OF the colloquy.
And they eat and eat, and the g.
year-old eats until he declares his
little tumny aches and ma reproves
him for having eyes larger than his
tummy.
They reach home again and ma
says, well. there's no place like
home"
81 told you that before we went"
replies pa.
Mushrooms and Mushrooms.
City Commissioner Hummef likes
mushrooms and so does City Attor-
ney Rine. Last week Mr.. Hummel
confded to his friend the discovery Of
a patch of mushrooms on the slope OF
the Creighton university grounds on
Twenty-fourth street. Rine poured a
few gallons of gasoline into his super
six and the twain sped away to the
scene which aroused the commits
sioner.
Rine scanned the fungus growth
and exclaimed, "Those are toad
stools"
"Well, that's why brought you out
here; ! wanted to know whether they
were mushrooms or toadstools," re-
piled Hummel.
Lest We Forget.
Do you know where Chadron is by
A Denial.
Ben Baker denies he is trying to
learn to play lawn tennis.
Liberty.
II understand that Steve Maloney
bought a Liberty bond out at Chad
ROM said Patsy Havey to his friend,
Michael Doolihan.
"How's that" asked Michael.
"Well," replied Patsy, you see,
he put up a $500 bond and got his
liberty, didn't hei" y
"And that's what ye be afther tell
ing me, is itf That's foin joke and
let me tell you, Patsy, me boy,
didn't think yc had it in ye at ALL"
reioined Michael