Arizona republican., 1917-12-02
For Sale Miscellaneous
"I.ovo Me. iove mv dawg. :"

He who loads his stomach. loads his brain: overload the stomach, you've got no brain. i've had turkey, thanks giving, and "thankscussin." A dear friend claiming to be the cook of cooks. invited. .-I accepted. After a long, weary wait, was seated. as "the guest of honor" next to her, Grasping the carver, her spouse shouted, "reddy?' "No, hubby, said she, not until Mir. Ford says grace" Me say Gracel Say, l can cusu with grace, dawdle with sweetness in grace, but to profane the church by muttering Grace, is beyond my ken. Years ago, Tin the wilds," l remem- bered n miners gathering at which was a big Swede, lately converted. The brother will give thanks" said the hos tess, nt which he turned all colors. Lord" he finally muttered, T ban stop here many years and had moighty turf grub, but this looks good today, so l am awful tankful." Thinking this appropriate, I started on the same lines, when a chunk of celery l was chew ing crossed the larynx. and with cop ibus flow of saliva was sputtered over the tRbfe, to the horror of guests, and my woeful consternatlon. That ended Grace" and the boss started at the turkey, striving hard to hit a joint. I've a good notion to put my knee on this turkey" yelled he, as with sweat and froth he whittled away first at neck. then at tail, and finally at tht hindermost leg. I neglected to say, that two gaunt felines and two aged ca hines encircled his chair, making their presence known by detonations, which at times made one forget surroundings the resemblance being to reverbera- tons of rolling thunder across chasms of the grand canyon, foreboding storm to see which I inadvertently went to the window adding insult to an injured hostess feelins, who thereafter treated me with the scorn deserved. Meantime the carving" was proceeding, partially successfully, as sport here can testify for the first joint of leg was severed and flying curvature lit on floor among a watchful animal group. Did you ever see newsboys when penny's were hurled among them, pile up?-Ditto- Cats dogs, feet. tails, heads, hands, and 'shoes.' were all there, but Sport won out, (momentarily) being in return, soon down and out" properly.-Age, you know makes sinews, both in bulls, turkeys. and man, solidify whereas teeth, spread, crumble, and soften, most anoyingly: - Anyhow, this leg got athwart his jaws, the gristles being i'm bedded between teeth, and with gasps, groans and pallsifying trimblings, Sport lost his breath, rolling over on his back in helpless stupor Say friends, womens affection is g. time worn anal ogy, and instanced daily. but not to equal this. as the madam. throwing both hands up, scattering the edibles far and wide, leaped over the table, and grabbing her aged associate wrenched from his mouth the tough ened tendrils bringing life to the car cass that I had hoped had passed into the kingdom of the hereafter. From this moment quiet prevailed. so did speech, but the windows of the soul" called eyes, in her case spoke volumes. and from change of color convinced me twas best to eat. and say nothing. l chawed too much: The Dr. says 1 will recover
 Mattresses by the dozen.
 Chairs of every make and shape.
 Davenports in mahog or oak.
 Leather or plain dining chairs.
 The very finest office furniture.
 Desks never seen in Phoenix
 Brass beds. and plain ones.
 Baby cribs and carriages.
 100 soft pillows at Sl00 each.
 Five blankets and quilts.
 Rugs and lovely carpets.
 Dressers for the elite, or poor.
 China closets of perfect loveliness. Book cases of all styles.
 Hall seats, and racks.
 Buffets for most fastidious.
 Chiffoniers of many styles.
 Library tables, 20 designs.
 oil burners for cook stoves.
 .. T
 Llnoleum extra thick, and medium A number of show cases.
 Several cash registers, some small. Elegant sew machines.
 Large assortment typewrters.
 Many sizes gasoline stoves.
 Some dandy gas ranges.
 Gas and oil heaters.
 Instantaneous gas boiler heater.
 Coffee urns and water filters.
 23-4 burner. oil stoves.
 A lot of trunks
 Electric, motor or hand washers
 Cream separators.
 150 milk cans, all sizes.
 Ffreless cookers, ? or hole.
 Auto boxes, racks and tools
 Electric lamps. chandeliers, etc.
 Jap screens for porch or window.
 Mems and some womens clothes.
 Books of every kind imaginable.
 A HOME BLESSING
 Wood and coal are expensive. I hay, new automatic distillate machine al ready to install. 1t cost $4O000. cal sell for s100.00. By it you can ligh entire house as well as cook.
 Guaranteed water boilers.
 Many blows and larrows.
 Harness and saddles.
 Guns and pistols of many kinds.
 Tents for autos. or camp.
 Hardware. crockery, and kitchel wSre
 Barrel churns and butter workers
 Tubs, buckets and tinware.
 Musical instruments all kinds.
 Electric carpet sweepers. cheap.
 new l4 h. D. motor and speed.
 An organ and a pianola.
 Gas and electric chandeliers.
 An electric blanket
 FOR TOURISTS AND CAMPERS
 A fine line of kodaks-Two larg lenses for photo and kodak. Drawin kits and many convenences.
 A full set of dentist tools.
 Electric waffle iron. beauty.
 Large pumps for mine or farm
 Cable. and hemp rope.
 fine steam tester and safety.
 Gurley transit. cost s500-S75.
 Electric massage and health kits
 Electric hair dryer
 FOR THE HOLIDAYS
 The finest articles Tor presents yo ever saw.
 I bought a bankrupt stock of ne' goods. Simply elegant-Come and loo the mover. Prices? No man dare com pete.
 DOES FOR BUY EVERYTHING?
 Only earthly trifles. Wouldn't refus furniture. stoves. hardware, crocker, guns. saddles. harness. rugs. beds. bed ding, clothes. shoes. refrigerators. fan