The Birmingham age-herald., 1917-05-29
Have You One of Those Little
 Bluebird- for-Happiness Rela-
 tives on Your Family Tree
By DOLLY DALRYMpLE

RH1l'D ask you home for dinner with
 me today if I could only shop q
 bluebrd-for- happiness relative Of my wifes off our family tree" said the baldheaded man to Jimmy Angelface yesterday.
 "Bluebird-for- -happiness?" What-d ye mean? Got in Aviary at your housey' he asked
 No; just. plain everyday maiden aunt" said the baldheaded man.
 Unpleasant sort of person?" commits erated the other.
 'Oh, no, no, no, no!" ejacuiated the other. Quite the contrary. Too d-d pleasant. (Excuse my French). She's one of those cultivated optimists."
 Whats an optimist?' he asked
 One Of those people that the only dif- ference between them and a pessimist IS er-er-one cocktail" he defined
 That canned good will toward men stuff, you mean?7 asked the other. "One of those people with the unrooted deter nination to make the best of the worst of things? A nothing so bad that it might not be worse variety of persons?''
 Sounds like a Christmas card senti- iilSHly SeilQ Iiie Ddlu1GdQeQ man. That sort of bluff which some people put up of believing in everything just so long as nothing disagreeable happens to them The kind that bore you to perfect fraz- ze In the dear dead days that are past once thought that steady diet of candy, all sorts of sweets would make pretty nice sort of long life menu. tried it for two days steady running, and after that the sight of a chocolate caramel, the whiff of mince pie or the aroma Of fruit cake put my commissary depart ment entirely out of business. Same way with canned optimism
 What dye want? A good, old-fash- toned row? Can't stand hot water tea menus?" came the question
 Precisely; I'd like to pull off fight, but how can l when this blamed blue bird-for- happiness aunt of mine has knocked all the fight out of my wife? There was a time when I could get up a TOW with Evelina any hour of the day or night-a regular Mrs. Caudle effect, but I'm blessed now if I believe I could even get E.Nelina to disagree with me about the weather. Why I firmly believe that if it was showing and I looked out the window and said the sun was shining, Evelina would say: Yes, dear; so it is, all or which is due to that er-er-' blue bird-for- happiness aunt of hers. w Ouiuil lldl dtSLTOy you
 Good little Evelina," said the other man. 'I know Ter like a book and this optimism that her -bluebird-for- happi- ness aunt has been infusing into her lit tie head won't last. When she goes home wait and see if Evelina doesn't return to her normal condition and storm you with a volcanic battery of It isn't so's,' and You've got another guess coming to you, Hubby and a lot of other wifely greet ings."
 tBut maybe Evelina likes this Mae terlinclz Irol osition,'' growled the other.
 Maybe she's made resolution that she'll keep it up. How about that?''
 T think .ou'd be lucky if she had,' was the reply You are the first per son I've eter seen who felt about op- tinism as you do; why man alive wait until you've resided under the roof with q pessimist'
 I've told the truth at any rate,n said the other man, and an eastern proverb says that truth is moon reflected in many waters
 Maybe, too, truth, like beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder; nay, deeper-in the heart,'' was the observation.
 Be that as it may,'' she said. I'm not down ell optimism, as optimism. Peace is | lovely and most lovable bird to keep round the house, but what | want is for my wife to be herself She is the only person in the world I ever enjoyed fighting with; she knows and ob- serves the rules of the game; you see, you've never seen Evelina when she's on one of her high horses and we start 1O-round, No 1 household boxing match, with words and"
 T know was the answer. I've been