The Daily Missoulian. [volume] (Missoula, Mont.) 1904-1961, 1917-09-02
az WILL 3. TOMBSTONE.

Sound the alarm! Here's the jazz
attack.
Trombones to right of IA, comets to
left of us and saxaphones in front of
us, will soon be volleycd and thun-
dercd. The dance craze Is going
crazicr. While our boys are crusading
against the goose step ''Over there"
We, at home, will be succumbing to tho
jazz step over here.
The jazz tarantula will infest Broad
way. beginning next Monday. when q.
Hepburn Wilson will let the bug out
of the bag ut the Hotel Mc.Alpin and
sic it on the light -foCtcd gentry Wis
ittng dancing musters, REQ strons) who
will come one-stcpping into town fol
light fantastic enlightenment.
New Workers who have already suf-
fcrcd from jazz music" merely got
jazzra zZitis in the incipient stage.
Now the crazy cadenza has become
virulent and the cacophonous notes are
to he interpreted into a jazz step by
specialists with caulifl0Wcr ear drums
The jazz tone poem. which sounds like
a boiler works symphony. will not only
find expression in the dance tcrics of
hclpD, but they will sing II While they
dance.
II this keeps on VIC may expect
Jazz soup spoons. jazz car wheels.
jazzoline engines with syncopatcd
explosions. The new jazz step Is in
fox trot time. and to dance it You
slide your feet like Il trombone. fore
and aft, port and starboard. and the
one who makes the most noise with
his tens land half wins the cut
glass dish. The appropriate tune for
it would be Broken Arches Falling
Down, My Fair Lady
BY n process of elimination the
jazSiest band on Broadway has been
engaged for the dance convention.
They will execute execute lis right
the musical drnmfire, and after dill
gent rchearsing feel able to slide
through the program without strili-
ing true note.
1t takes a lot Of brass in the band
TO jazz and II will take lots to dance
it, but it viii take more brass to
sing it. Hello. Pals" Is the friendly
title of the singing dance to be
introduced this season by the Jazz
pors. hut the singing viii be dclibcr-
ately mfricndls. The cabaret Caru-
sos with unmusieal tonsls and colora-
tura adenoids will inf,ict themselves
on New York and the country at
large, for when our dancing dolls and
tired business voices try to find tho
ranges their lower Register won't,
and their top notes will all be wild
pitches. Uptown hatboys and walters
will join in the chorus. and, as birds
.Af h.. 81.
help lot. Between the Jazz feet and
the jazz voices. it will be worse than
the old hoof -and- mouth disease.
New York is the terpsichorear
melting pot" remarked Mr.. Wilson
yesterday. az he signed Cries OF Au,
thor at the end of his latest novelty
THE RamLle, a War Dance
! Dancing is a finished art that i.
never finished" he went on, and r.
created not by the dancing instructors
but by the people. under the inspiring
| influence of garishly gilded cafes. daz.
zling lights and tintinnabulating, tilt
ing melody. which makes the hear
beat two-folJe time with a tantalizin;
| tempo
| What Mona Lisa was to Leonardo
| so the dance Is to the BrOadwa,
tango hounds. laboring under sponta
nctA,s creative impulse. And stand
ardizing the dance is treason. stand
ardiZatiOn limits the scope Of the art
LIST and leads only to the beauty o
flivvcrs. ..s.-. a.
The new r;lmblc is u one step fox
trOt- waltz-all in One--and will incsnd
the right -f:,cc. lcft-face turns of tn
military drill Home guarders shoul'
be adept IN this step, and when tn
rambling begins their feet will NOV
like the chase picture In a six. reelel
The tango is to be revived. TIL
1913 model tango will be simpiifie
into a self-starting step. The oil
! complicated recipe bouquet of Casti
r pinch Of Maurice, scramble Of leg
: and call the police" will be censored.
. Columbus discovered America, al
Irving Berlin discovered Hawaii III