The Washington herald., 1917-03-03
Want to Be a Good Talker
BY ORIsON SWEET MARDEN.

Young men as we'll as young women
who want to improve their conversa-
tional powers will get good hint in
the suggestions of a young woman
who has recently formed a conversa-
tional circle for young society women
in New York.
According TO this bright woman, in
spite of their early advantages, many
debutantcs stand much in need of drill
in interesting conversation. She be-
llcvcs the time has passed when men
do rot want intelligence in woman,
because Life is so much kCcner to-
day that beauty no longer satisfies
The averag" man; he demands re-
sponsivc interest in the affairs OF the
day"
In outlining her work to an inter
viewer, she said Pm gathering a
group Of tho dcbutantcs about me
here in the Plaza Hotel once A week,
very informally, to discuss the affairs
Of the day. | want to interest them
in something beside the society COL
urln OF the newspaper. don't lee
turc to them, just try to call to
their attention the movements and
projects in various fields with which
intelligent people arc concerned; :;
topics that they may like to watch, st
new. still, so up to the minute that
they have not yet found their way
into books. want to encourage the
broadest scope OF interests, the broad
est world views
"One week VIC discussed diplomacy
and the sort OF work which our rep
rCscntativcs. our conSuls and ambas-
sadors in foreign lands are called
upon to do.
I've arc also interested in the mcr-
chant marine which has been debated
in Congress. That is one OF tho ro-
mantle SUBJECTS; it is interesting to
compare the clippers OF old with the
racing yachts Of today.
Most girls enjoy learning about
interesting things when they arc no,
conscious they arc being instructed
"Whcn we talk about the drama Of
today | shall have photographs Of
the leading lights in tho dramatic
world
MY aim in having these talks for
or with-debutantes is not to tell
them what to think on any subject,
but to carry out the thought with
which Demosthcnes used to conclude
his orations, 4 beg of you to think. "
IL beg OF you to think" If you
do, and if you act as well, any young
man or woman, either in town or
country, can readily do what this lady
is doing in New York.
In practicing conversation, don't
make the mistake OF being always Sc
rious or solemn. Conversation is not
preaching, although some people
seem to think it is.
They are always delivering mono
lOgucS. little preachmcnts; they can
not, seemingly, talk in any other
way. They have an idea that con-
versation must always and everywhere
be a serious cducative matter, that
people should converse only to i'm
prove their minds; to increase their
knowledge, that there should be no
frivolity or lightness about it. One
might just as we'll say people should
go to theaters only to improve their
minds; that they must not go for en-
joyment, for the purpose of being en-
tertaincd. A monotonouS, heavy con-
versation has about the same effect
upon the mind as the resting OF the eye
for a long time upon a single solid
color, like red or green. The mo-
notony tires the nerves OF the eye
and the brain. and as the constant
changing Of color, the variety tina,
passes before the eye rests it so is
llS NIdllSlIlS Ol lllC zone OF COnNcfSa-
tion from grave to gay, from serious
to light and playful, restful to the
mind.
A popular society woman counsel
ing debutante protegee on behavior
is quoted as saying, Talk, talk, talk.
1t does not matter much what you
say, but chatter away lightly and
gayly. Nothing embarrasses and
bores the average man so much as a
girl who has to be entertained"
Light, frothy talk can hardly be
called conversation, but it has its uses
and is very valuable on occasion. 1t
relieves monotony, and in any event,
provided it is not ill-natured, is better
than an awkward, embarrassing ST.
lcnce. The touch and go Of society
takers, the small talk of social inter
course, has its place in the repertory
OF the skilled conversstionalist as well
as more serious subjects.
IConEriRht 1871