Honolulu star-bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1912-2010, 1917-08-25

Il quite agree with you in your
criticism of our advertisement in the
bapers.
II we're to criticise your criti
cism | would say that think you
use too freely your gift OF rIdiCule
dnd SARCASM.
# DOUBT II there was any inten'
ZION TO be unpatrlotlc or silly.
Men are not all gifted IL express
.Es themselves.
ii hau any doubt about the just
less OF your criticism it would be re-
go ~ IKE CUQIInents OF score o.
TOmen / have seen. You have them
ali on your side: Join the Chamber
-~-uue LI-GIe.
hanks, awIuIIy. Id feel about as
- d, I-J4Ae On the IiOOr or the
~hamber OF Commerce as / would
locked Out IN a bishops leggins.
/ don mind attending q prayer
meeting, or an AFTERNOON tea, anu
.~.c e4.u grace after a fasnIon, Out
o 81! Up in a place where men talk
Lollars and cents, sum UP totals In
.IsuIeS, discuss the details OF eXpenGi-
lire and taXation-eXcuse me!
Id get SO muddled they put me
Town as stupidity or Uue OF the de-
.ectlve creatures / have so unchari.
,aoy denounced from my pulpit.
There's nothing quite so embar.
fasslng as pelns out On place some.
Wnere. Getting into the wrong pew.
Its a gooo zeal the way d Oashful
young man teels about Ills Lands and
NJ hn l.;
oest girl has Inveigled him into Only,
1t your brains that are involved in.
stead OF youf hands and feet.
I've never liked to De conspicuous
0y virtue of long hair, oddity of man.
ner or dress, the want OF front teeth,
or a bald spot, and | never take a
ircnt seat i'll a public building.
l learned at college that when a
freshman occupies a front bench in
the arena, he ends up by going to the
rear at examination.
| would feel conspicuous sitting in
the Chamber Of Commerce.
don't think ever try to be smart,
or say anything for the sake of say.
ing it.
In fact, have to be pretty well
stirred UP by indignation, a sense OF
fun, or pity, before l can make up
my mind to write.
And l hate to think of having to
write anything. The fact that duty
impels nae troubles me a good deal.
l never sit down to write it. l go
off to Thomas Square or somewhere,
or wake up at o'clock in the morn.
ing and think it over. Then, when
it's all composed, every word of it,
copy it out of my head. 1t just
flows out like artesian water at high
pressure.
have nothing to do with it except
to put 1t down. I've never wondered
at the Ouija board.
Before the ink is dry, what I've
written sounds pretty good to me and,
il anybody's around, may bore them
with IL, especially, If it's verse (take
notice and don't try to get intimately.
+ Poets are great nuisances, and their
wives deserve pity on this account.
II you look over the-lis of divorces
granted, you will find that in a num-
Der of cases the cause of complaint
is-"Suffered great agony of mind lis
tening for an hour this morning to my
husbands Ode to Mrs. Mulligan's
Burnt Toast" -.
But when the article Is out in cold
print Il don't read my own stuff any
1nore), / get the 0shivers. | feel dis
appointed and blue over 1t all. / rea.
lie how much better almost any one
else could have done II. ~
There are a dozen men here who
could have written better criticism,
but they didn't write any, and knew
thy wouldn't.
I'd sight rather have sat down in
my easy chair and read an enjoyable
article. I'd have learned something
then.
l could get my name in the papers
at much less cost to my nervous sys-
tenn.
(. AS Mrs. Malaprop would say-My
astral intentions would have been in.
tercalated by the misapprehension of
knowledge. .c =
For nothing is truer than this-that
don't care darn what happens to
my LITERARY pIOuuCllOuS dLIST L luluh
they have accomplished what they
we're written for, and send my
friends reprints as propaganda to con-
vince them of something I want their
help in, or, If they already agree with
me, to prompt their cooperation.
It's not with mercenary purposes,
either, you bet. I've never done a
thing for myself yet, but on the ad.
vice of friends. I'm thinking about
beginning.
OF course, sometimes write a
verse, the surface of a deeper emo.
ton, or a squib for laughter. and for
these I'm very we'll pleased to have
appreciation. get it, too. lot more
than / deserve.
When vas in San Francisco the
last time they gave me'a dinnec On
the strength of some rhymes l hal
written. They didn't say a word about
the heavy treaties have written on
theology, medicine. or the theory OF
cerebral vacuums-not much. They
didn't even know that was pre-.
eminent scientist, lnil osopher and doc.
tor. There were Some pretty big
men at that table, too They made
me feel like a six day old potato salad
ri