Courier Democrat. (Langdon, N.D.) 1891-1920, 1917-04-26
Letters Of the
Counting Period
By DONALD CHAMBERLAIN


Why 1t is that a pair of lovers will
change their opinion Of each other so
often, dropping from an infinite height
to an infinite depth and rising from a
profaned depth to a heavenly height,
is n of the many mysteries Of love.
Ovid wrote Of the art of love. He had
better have written of the chaos of
love. Here are some letters written
by one of my grandfathers and one of
my grandmothers when they were
counting. The first is from grandpa.
Just listen to it:
Dearest, Sweetest Matilda-I have but
Just come to my room from hearing you
say that you would be mine, but I cannot
refrain from writing you how happy you
have made ME. l have met many girls,
but you are the only angel among them
l am awestruck whom I think of my hay
Ing secured such a prize. I only four the
when you find out how unworthy I am
you will cast me off.
My grandfather was in such q. futter
that ten minutes after he had left my
grandmother to continue on paper the
twaddle he had lavished on her in
speech he was in his room writing the
above effus1on. 1t would seem that
these young lovers. never can break
the steady: flow of~love that pours from
their hearts, and if they succeed in
doing so they must needs repair the
break in some other form as quickly
as they can: get an opportunity.
And what possessed the man possess
ed the woman. Scarcely had grand
father left bis mate than she rushed
to her escritoire and, sitting down, took
pen and paper and continued her own
heart outpouring in the following note:
Dearest-I know that I am foolish, but /
cannot-though you have not been gone
ten minutes-refrain from telling you how
infinitely happy you have made me by the
honor you have done me. 10 be loved by
such a man is simply ecstacy. How hon
orable you have been in refraining from
telling me you loved me before speaking
to papa!
OF l can't give what must
have taken hours to write. Besides,
what would be the use? 1t is all on
the same high G key. If he was writ
ing to al angel she was writing to a
god. Let us see how the mercury
dropped after the first spat:
Dear Miss MARSHALL must say I was
surprised at your action this evening. l
supposed you We're above treating even q
coachman, to s ~ nothing of a gentleman,
as you treated me. Do you consider what
you did ladylike? l confess that if my
father had a kitchen maid who would act
toward me as you ave lone I should in
sist on her discharge.
Note the rapid fall from angel to
Kitchen maid. And the old dufrer-1
forgot; my grandfather was then
young considered himself a gentle
a 4 gentleman to compare his
best girl to a kitchen maid! But his
act is nothing to compare with hers.
1t takes a woman to express her opin-
ion Of a man when she's mad:
Mr.. Winchell-I thought you were a gen
tleman. That illusion is gone forever.
You will always hereafter be classed with
those young men who, having been
brought up in the backwoods, have not
learned how to treat a lady. Since 1 don't
consider you worthy to enter my house l
beg that you will never again do so.
hou you prosecute ME with your atten-
tons hereafter I shall inform my brother.
In the evening after dinner 1 will let
Watch loose. His teeth are very sharp.
Noting the date of this letter, l find
that a reconciliation was expected the
day it was written. At any rate, here
are two letters, the first from grandpa,
bearing the same date as the last
quoted:
Dearest-Thank heaven it's all explained!
I will call at half past s to take the noblest
woman in the world in my arms and give
her a million kisses!
The dog that was to have been let
loose seems to have lost his terror.
This is her reply:
Oh, my darling, now UNNECESSARILY
happy ] am that this horrid nightmare
is over! And to think that it should lave
been about so trifling a matter as your
criticising the buckles on my shoes! Do
come earlier thar half past 8. We shall
be through dinner by half past Z, and how
can I wait a whole hour for you?
For a fortnight after this the waters
were untroubled; then came a flash Of
lightning out Of a clear sky. Its vio-
lence marks it for the lady's:
Sir-I return with this, by our negro
boy Sam, our ring. Considering who
ave it to ME. he is more thar a worthy
messenger. 1 would express a hope that
you would be happy With another girl if
1 did not feel sure you would lead any
woman a horrible life. Return my letters
at once by bearer.
His reply:
l will return your letters when you have
returned mine. Respectfully yours. etc.
This doesn't sound so bad as CON-
pairing his angel to a housemaid, but
it is really worse. He intimates that