The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1917-12-15
LETTERS OF !
TWO WOMEN
Rebellion.
ny ZOE BECKLEY
Kerryville, Kan, the 29th.


Kate Dear:
To be honest-no, I am NOT
pleased about the baby. Later on,
perhaps, I might have been glad to
give Curtis Junior a playmate, a part
ner in schooling and in all the build
ing processes of life. But 1 wanted
to get my equilibrium first, Kate. You
cannot imagine the incessant demands
a young baby makes upon a woman!
think have not known a real nights
rest since baby Curt was born, and
that was six months ago. I look at
myself in the mirror and shudder. I
am the typical, thin, pale, worn, wor-
ried, tired, round-shouldered mother,
who has no time for clothes or other
diversions, no time to be attractive,
no time for anything but housework
and baby-tending.
I wanted a little respite of rest and
happiness. For after my crazy break
home, we were happier. A sort of
calm settled on our home. A false
calm see it was now, for again
there are many storm clouds above US.
Katie, wonder if women ever really
WANT children? Don't they just have
them? And, after they are on the
way, become reconciled? 1t seems to
me cannot think of one woman who
deliberately planned to have a fam
lily and carried out her plan with viii
mostly
accidents. Only the other day nv
washerWoman sent me a note saving
she couldn't come as she was too Ill,
pending the birth of the fourth, but
as as soon as her trouble was over,
she would resume her weekly stunt
In my kitchen tubs.
Her trouble" Kat; think of sneak
ing of her coming baby as "troubIe"i
Isn't 1t frightful that women have so
oIten TO be mere machines of repro
ductlon? 1t is all wrong, dear, and 1
have made up my mind that this sec
ond kiddie, shall be my last.
l said something of this to my
mother-1n-law recently and dark
cloud came over her face. 1t was a
deflance of the Almighty" she said.
ana when 1 asked her if she thought
1t would not be equally a defiance of
the Almighty to bring six or seven
children into the world to be cared
| for on Curtis's income of S25 a week.
she looked startled, but repeated her
axiom that the Lord sends and the
| Lord provides" Frr
1t is not understandable to me why
the exercise of CO. sense and
| self-control SO that ones family may
not increase beyond the bounds of
ones ability to provide for them is a
defiance of God. By the same token,
why isn't it the same sort of de-
| fiance when we try to prevent acct
dents and illnesses? Surely they
come from the same superhumarl
agency I am forgiven. even expected
| to guard against typhoid fever by
| scientific means. But to refuse to bear
more children than my physical STAN
ina can endure, or decline to go on
having them for somebody else to
support and educate, is called wicked
| by such minds as my mother-in-l law s.
And she is called a good woman, Who
was it said 1T is the good people who
do all the harm in this world? ?"
So much for my troubles!
1 was tickled to death to learn
about c. US dining at home with you
and Paul. Paufs a wonder Me for
himi You don't half appreciate your
blessings. 1t was. brilliantly clever
thing, his forcing you to see G. J. at a
disadvantage. For ONCE you saw him
| as he really is. I hope you're cured
, of him. 1 don't mind your having a
lover, but for heavens sake pick q
| worthwhile one!
Always thine, MAY.