Askov American. [volume] (Askov, Pine County, Minn.) 1914-current, 1917-06-14

framed for u.s. Sur1ice it to say that
they went into effect the next morning
according To schedule.
We met at breakfast. l am never at
my best before drink my first cup Of
coffee in the morning, and the thought
Of the inhuman way l was about to
treat my "tummie" depressed me more
than usual. The table was CHASTITY
white. unbroken by the usual cheerful
array Of steaming hot dishes. At each
place was large glass Of water and a
napkin. What the napkin was for l
failed to discover l imagine 1t was
what the anthropologists would call "a
survival Of culture"
We have fifty-eight five gallon bot
ties Of distilled water" Lucille in
formed us. Il wonder if that will be
enough. 1t amounts to nearly hun
dred gallons apiece"
| made hasty calculation and de-
cided that hundred gallons Of drink
ing water would last me the rest Of
my life.
Mrs. Green. Luciles mother, was pa
tiently cheerful and drank three glasses
of water like sponge. l didn't care
much for mine. had previously had no
idea that water was SO fiat and taste
less. 1t is also an extraordinarily elus-
i've and clammy thing to put into an
empty stomach which is eagerly ex
pecting bacon and eggs, mullins and
coffee.
II feel better already" Lucille said
gayly as We left the table. "My mind
vital energy in merely diPesting food"
knew that she was quoting Upton
S. Clair, whom I was beginning to re-
gard with disfavor, to say the least,
but refrained from vOicing my opin-
ion Of man who will help women to
get even more fool ideas than they can
think up by themselves.
took a cigar from my pocket, cut
the tip OF carefully with q silver cut
ter Lucille had given me the previous
Christmas and was about to light 1t
when she stopped me.
mo, no, no; you mustn't. Did l for
get to tell you that while We are fast
ing we have to give up all stimulants
and narcotics. such as alcohol and to-
baccO!"
"What-cut out smoking for a week?'
Certainly" she replied firmly. I'm
the first place, II you don't you will be
deathly ILL.,; in the second place. the
W hn1 nj, Of thn CT &, IN y-i1
body Of all toxic poisons, such as nico-
tine, alcohol and so forth. BY the time
you have done without tobacco for a
week l should not be surprised If you
never smoked again.
"Nor me either" reflected gloOmly
out loud. 'I'll be dead
"Of course If you don't care to make
the experiment" Lucille said icily. "I'l
put off the fasting for another week
until Frank Bopp is here I'm sure he
will be willing to try it."
This was waving a red flag at me-
Frank Bopp was my rival. After her
reference to him l would have gone
without breathing for week If she
had suggested it. Bopp is a thin, con-
versational insect who can perch on
the arm Of girls chair and chirp by
the hour. Sometimes l regret that for
architectural and educational reasons
| can't do that, and then remember
what other men would think of me i.
| could. and I am solaced. l refrain
rom saying what think of the name
'Bopp."
Thus through my love and jealousy
vas led into deeper water or. shall
say. more water because somebody
handed me a glass Of the stuff every
.ew minutes. | drank 1t In the vain
nope that ! could drown the inner
nan. who seemed to be yelling for
'.clp all the time and kicking me just
Glow the belt buckle when he didn't
cct 1t.
That morning we went for walk
Walking Is the best exercise in the
world" Lucille stated. 1T is excellent
,or reducing surplus flesh around the
abdominal region"
Invariably she had little singer for
me concealed in any remark she might
make. | have since learned that this
is II sign that woman takes proprie-
larry interest in II man.
Before we went she fed ToOtles, her
long haired pup. Tootles is one OF those
DOGS SO constructed by nature that
when YOU want TO look them in the face
you don't know where to look. l often
woudcr if Tootlcs herself isn't in doubt
rs TO which end to wag
isn't Tootles going to fast, too?" l
protested. Cant she stand it as well
rs l CAM
Possibly she could do it," Lucille
said Us she gave her dog biscuit.
but she hasn't intelligence enough to
understand why she should go without
Good"
I'm not far above Tootles in intelli-
,cnce. them" remarked. but under my
breath this time. so she could not hear.
After watching TootleS eat we went
walking. Whenever I 90 walking In
The city hire n taXicab. If want to
see nature in all her grandeur do go
tramping through the woods? l DO
not I buy scat nj q moving picturp