davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
La prensa. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1913-1962, 1917-09-24
(Pasa a la Sa. Col. 3a.)
10 duda ella, acasO?

-. 10 uuud eIIi, dSdSO-
Pero 81 yo no deseo mas que este.
mo sabe que tengo el coraz6n des'
pedazado desde su Marcia? 70 nc
vivo va: lloro codas las noches en- M
habitaci0n Y algunas wees en- ell CAM
DO. cuando cstoy solo.
BESIDE que Mi pobre mujer murio,
no tcnia mas que a ella en- el mundo.
Vaya, vaya, senior Doltaire, los hiJos
no Sc dan cuenta de 10 que hacen SUI
frir a los padres, partiendo de repen-
! te. como en- esta OCCASION.
Despu5s continue con voz aspera,
| como necesitado de descargar su pc
IA V de acusarse 4 81 mismo para dis
! minuir sus remordimientos.
-Eoto a. Va Sc que no son de
ella todos los errores.
s. 70 no hubiese querido neciamen-
te obi.ga.Ia q casarse con e! senior
Marcelo, q quien ella no puede tragar,
este no habria ocurrido, Gverdad?
En- el fondo, ella no lie guerra, por-
cue estaba e~namoricada de csc An
dres, dc csc ingenierillo; 20 mismo, 10
ccnficso, tambien habia pensado en-
comr!accr a mi hija antes de saber
quicn era el.
ST. 70 habia tenido ideas sobre csc
joven.
Tn buen muchacho, 4 fe mia, ira
bajador, buena persona v NADIA ton
to. A.demas. habia salvado 4 mi hi
La prensa. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1913-1962, 1917-09-24

atearian. comvajeci@aIosa intericr-
mca,c 81, .a tr'sreza e-e rera,a52 IN
. t!rouoala .~yraaQa..a : fatt4@aa 5e
Da.,ebois.
Cuando Sc hubo sensaGo. no sin
c.e-,a .2sula,rd. ;mrres.onado por el
azpervo severo del !ugar, ell padre &c
llagdalena dijo;
-:Es para ha5larme de negocios
nara 10 que ne he hecho venir?
Porque Ie preyengo. senior Do!taire.
que no esroy dispuesto en- este naomen
to 4 aceptar las proposiciones que US
ted me IN hecho reSpecto dc 81 nue.
Va maquina DC batir.
~ por que:
-Po-aue ne sierto mas jnc.i22do =
.:saidar. = env;ar q paseo Ia hacienda.
les an:males ' -5jos los ch;c:mDo.os.
-yamos. amos. amigo na!.ebo.s.
aaaa de lesaEe@zo.
Ccn-engase listed, iaul jiablo,; TO-
davia Is listed Vt hor2b-e.
-Es possible, Y hasta SECURE. QUE
% sea III houhre an:mOso codav.a;
Zero Yea listed, Senor DoltGiro. tn.l-
~ soy " pare. -. sal-e 'Ien
d.s&r2cjado. :v2ya.
iOh. 81. muy dess-aciado.-reriti5
nclinando a cabeza endorsements.
Doltaire Sc Sinti6 ~cormov!Go por es-
tas Gltinas palabras. en- las cuaIes 81
huen hombre 2cababa de eNhalar SIM
plen,ente el grito de 81 alma deli
La prensa. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1913-1962, 1917-09-24
ia ell dia del fuego, iverdad?

i ell dia del fuego, iverdad?
Entonces, ell reconocimlento Y W
POGO de simpatia me i~nclina:oa -dci.
el.
Llegue a figurarme que Quizas pc
dria resultar un buen marido para
ella Y I'm buen yerno para mi.
Pero, c~ataplum, aqui esta 10 malo:
csc pobre diablo no tenia nonbre n;
fanilia, IN nino c~ualquiera %encontra.
do. Entonces, 5comprende listed? re,
trocedi.
Fijese listed, senior Doltaire, iur
nino encontrado!
DespuGs, cuando vi que Ia nina 10
guerra, NE decidi... Y quise obligar-
la q que Sc casara con el otro; yo
estaba idiota.
Como 81 fuese possible violentar ell
corazon de los j0venes y meterles en-
Ia cabeza ideas que no tienen.
En- efecto-aprob0 el senior Dol
taire,-los sentimentos no admiten "a
zones. Y en- las mujeres, sobre TODD,
mucho mas sensibles que nosotros,
cuando Ell amor existe, la razon pier
de sus derechos.
--Esto cs 10 que 20 me die des-
pues... demasiado tarde: Ia nina ha-
bia escapado...
Bien sabe listed, senior Doltaire, que
la nina puede volver.
iQue ell diablo ME llave 81 la vuel-
vo a hablar de csc senior Marcelo,
La prensa. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1913-1962, 1917-09-24

Dallebois levantandose estupefacLo Y
anSioso.
ST, 10 Sc, pero tenga calma.
-Digamelo en- scguida y correr5 a
b~uscarla.
"A su tempo, a su tempo, ami
go mic.
BESIDE luego este listed ~tranquilo
sobre su suerte; esta muy bien, nc lie
ha sucedido NADIA malo Y Sc hal!a STEM
pre- digna de listed.
Ash 10 espero.
-Si-replic6 Doltaire con calor,-
no podia ocurrirle NADIA.
Su hija, mi querido Dallebois, es
una perfecta Y honrada ~ioven, en- IA
mas pura acepci6n de Ia palabra; es
una naturaleza noble Y generosa, muy
dulce Y muy t%ierna; adem&s, n :
listed mucho.
-iPardiez. Bien 10 Sc.
No ha cometido mas que Tn error
verdadero, que ha sido huir de 81 ca
sa. cuizas enlcquec:da por IN exec,
so de autoridad de parte de listed.
Pero este eror 10 deplora vivamen-
te todos los dias, COMO tambien TO-
"a el carino perdido.
81 ella supiera que listed estaba
dispuesto a ~perdonarla, sin restriccio-
mes, no pediria mas que arrojarse en-
brazos de listed Y volver a su casa
isl yo IA quiero perdonar?-dijo
Dallebeois incorporandose de nuevo.
La prensa. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1913-1962, 1917-09-24
Ademas. tampoco esta ALI: q IA

Ademas. tampoco esta ALI; 81 TAM
bien he partido.
-iAh.-dijo-Doltaire, sorprcndido
y admirado 4 la vez.
y, despuGs de TODD, yo quiero mas
j mi hija que a csc joven, 6verdad?
BESIDE ell momento en- que ella no 10
quiere, yo no debo forzarla, porque
causaria su desgracia.
.-iEn buena hora, en- buena bora.
-dijo Ell fabricante.-He aqui unas
sabias palabras, amigo Dallebois.
Creame, listed sera recompensado mas
prcnto de 10 que cree.
-iAh! si-continu6 Dalebois ST.
guiendo Ell curse de sus pensam,en-
tos,-si csc joven hubiese tenido pa
dres, Sc habria podido YER.
-jEh?... :quien lie he dicho a
listed que no los tiene, amigo Dale
bois?
u listed 10 cree?
-Estoy SECURE.
" digo mas; listed quizas Sc lison-
jearia y Sc molestaria al mismo ITEM
pc, 81 ~conociera, en- dia proximo, a la
noble familia a que %pertenece.
i Que NE dice listed, senior Dale
bois? les possible cue yo me haya
enganado haste este punto?
iPero es precise que yo sea una
bestia, iverdad?
-Paciencia, ~paciencia, amigo Dale
bois, que va sabra listed este mas tar
La prensa. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1913-1962, 1917-09-24

.aTtc.
: c~9nvercido de que 81 dolor h2-
bin he.ho 50 obra de purificacion y
de que e. terreno Sc hallaba prepara-
do para el rerd6n. dijo en- tono grave,
cast solenne:
-Pues bien. amigo Dalebois, es JUS
tamente al padre a Quien me voy q
dirigir esta noche V no al hombre. al
c~Iiente, q Quien NADIA tengo que decir
en- este momento.
Dallebois levanto Ia cabeza atento Y
avido de escuchar en- seguida.
-Si-continu6 eli fabricante;-es al
padre, V listed me perdonara, ami
20 MIC. Que no lie maya dicho en- mi
carta de 10 cue Sc trataba.
Guerra verle antes. escucharle Y ira
tar de adivinar las disposiciones de
su eS2iritu : de Su coraz6n.
-Esto no es dificil de adivinar.
y listed me entieAde bien; no ten
go mas que IN cuidado, un solo deseo,
el de ~encontrar q mi pobre Y querida
hija perdida,
-Bien. bien-aprob6 Do,taire dull
cemeHte.
-Vamos, a hablar de su hija,
de esta bella Y querida MagGalena
quizas ingrata para listed.
ST NE promote ser razonao.e. le
voy a dar noticias dc ella, buenas no.
ticias.
-5Sabe listed d6nde esta?-grit0
La prensa. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1913-1962, 1917-09-24
CAR'TAS DE MUJEsREES
Besar al nOviO

"No te ~sorprenderas 81 tie asegUro
one esta carta Ia escribo q las 7 de
II manana, a medic ~vestir, sorpren-
dida de este sol que no sue.o yer nun
ca antes de Us nueve, de! tragin lie
la Gale que despierta. entire II Y We
mir de los criados cue aSean Ia casa
y salem a las compraS del dia: no ne
crecras 81 te juro Que que 20, tan
; p~erezosa. ne m~adrugado hoy NADIA mas
para escribirte. y conste que no 20
hacia deSde aquelloS tcrribles di"S de
! communion en- e! COiegio.
Pero es que tenia ansias de eScri-
hir esta carta, ansias dc decir,c a Ii,
mi amiga Y mi hermana, 10 que tie
dire en- estas cuatro ca"i!l2S qae =
hoga l!rnar,. de lptra mas menIda
para que mas quepa IN elias; q: que
81 hubiese pasado una bora mas sin
tsrirle :! alguien.... este que /"
. saber. IN" hGbiera cn:crmato dc de-
: r~sycraciorI. Tan crave ash rs.
Va me imagine 10 que p~;ra7as On
j este momerto: aQuella locue!a. Que Sc
crcia enamorada dcfin!tiyaM:rnte. con
! ,:p amor tiuico que "SP-:aba ha"!a
Z tioaIao = uuc en- vaHo hab!a b"sca!o
entire g.! fiat iao.rmtc o r!d!"U.o lie
; tapto; como Il cortcia:on, ha rcH!dc
&C. 81 novio. con csc que ella creyo
/ eI csncradc. q Que dcbia rcnlr y CUE
v:ao por fin. q Que hac.a realidad
tcacs los en5uenos de III cabec;ta &c
meridiunal apasionada; : no. 10 hay
tai. te ~equivocas De medic I medic.
y ahora te habras pensado otra
cosa. como 81 10 Vera: 81 noVio d.!
aho yasado. aquel i Cuien did pro
mesa de casamiento y que Sc mar-
che = terminar no 81 quc car:c:a 81
!cs Es1udos Unidos. In yuelto. : re
. cam" q cumplim:onlo de IN prone
: "a. Y "a yobrc Juliet& es.a en- IN t.
rrible trance,
,,. ..I r. 10 ,.ro -; 10
~ "' .s "
10 '"'" 81" y. ~
.
t. "!Hp"i' "e -
ma e''''- -.
:! "e -" eS"'..'o mnnuo.
:. '"'S''''1 go ~ s..S III
III '""'S Ct !, ars,,,or.
"''0 H""' ~ no.;Ja a., ,.r
|1C s.r,.;a..r r;.I
' =; i.o.o,~or. .so-
-. -. ..ar.
"S.' H"'
''@ ""'V' SN"'''
,.o, ~. 5e.oarrada ,i,9da de rampa-
~ mar, dieri.iere, II, era NADIA agra
5chIe nosa-. Ia rochc ALI.
.~GeneraImentc caminabamos du-
rarfa nuesu,a caut:vidad. desde Ia 8
g.. n msSara hayta las ) de Ia tarde,
nm iornqda da 3 millas, durante IA
La prensa. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1913-1962, 1917-09-24

I d le iCuctuuSy NC ~ wv "HN, /"
&c mucho tempo, bajo el olmo del
+ patio de recreo en- ell Sag7ado Co.
raz6n. hablamos una de las ultimas
tardes del aho pasado, cuando va da-
haYncs el adios a aquella casa, por-
,rue ibamos a entrar en- el mundo. a
vestirnos de largo w.. 4 tener no.
vio....
Hablamos de muchas cOsas, diras
til: 81. de muchas cosas, pero entire
elias, de una. sobre Ia cual discutimos
largo ratio Y con tanto a~pasIonamIen-
to. que una madre lego Il amonestar-
nos. Hablabamos de Marta, de aque-
la que tenia un novio estudiante, y
4 uuian encontraron besandose con e,
y discutiamos sobre aquellO que Mar
"a habia hecho.
Las dos djjimos, c~onvcnciGaS: nucs-
tros n~oyioS, jamas besaran los iabios,
come g! suyo 4 Marta. Y adujlmos
raZoneS Y mas raZone1, y todas las
iuZgamoS tan de peso. que POGO a POGO
nuestro couvcncimiento So iba naclen-
DO mayor. Pero. sin saber por que tn
:Hvcrt!sle puca iirmeZa en mis- afr
maciCncS, J 70 poca flrmeza en- las
tnra.. Y rntcnccs hirimos un pacLo:
{! din que una dc nosotras tenga un
novio = csc noyio la bese Ell In boca
: ala no 10 rechace indignada. habr&
40 corferarIo = In otra.
p,,es bien. how podras decir de mi
- enc o~ouaIla tarde, baio 81 olnc del
natio. djiimos tn 70 de Marta: mi
rovio me ha besado en- Ia boca V 20.
~ No - he recha2ado indirnada.
Ar,so ante q tribunal de I'll con
,;,r,.,, -; b,.ra h~arnana ne acu-
.e. ,.a da l;uera. = dc mala, de i1u-
Che c,rcs horiiD!es drlitos mas. por
clio vas 4 permitirme que con MI con-
fssir- ,.,a ,anbicn mi d~efensa. que
70 - Que me absolver&s. cue ne ali
,,lva,js 5Ia..r:enre. deshecho ante
20. ,ias F., dejito Que echamos ell
rr7cas scbre las espa!das de aquella
a~r;ru;tg de cc!egio tenia ell no.
rio ~es,udian,e.
A}berto babia Dasado ounce dias le-
;os Ga mi. 70 no 81 Dol aua les nom
brs. On r,ar;o e., a-7aLc.. no do
;a, -oda crase 10 negocjos = Sc dedi-
.ar . ESQ. = ANA 4 ser amados.
TENN ansias. infinitas ans:as de ver-
70 ia oiylo de hahIarle. Cada vez
me dow mas eyacta cuenta de que Sc
In hacho dueho complcto de mi. de mi
,:J; toda. cue m dia entero sin aI@o
sn~o O. m dja no vivido. IN dia va
70. gris como los de los anniversaries
hc.ros,s. Aver Dor Ia manana. SUI
nr.na OGeIa mo -caio una t~arieta SUI
go. b.bi, uorodo mr. /, ,ocho y ope.
49,, ,.arr,e crorto antes. Fin su ga
g, bobio fiesta II cita So arregl6
hien aronta ahi nos veriamos. Ade-
n me bah;a dirho. algo muv intere-
80
La prensa. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1913-1962, 1917-09-24

'A''HA !oSa = 49,
Gas G;ficuItades de a campana en-
Africa. entertainments para Ia fuga Y
persecution de los restos de las fuer-
zas del kaiser. que sc italian ahora a.
c~orraladas en- Ia esqsina Sure3te de.
Africa oriental alemana, Ie ia Ia des-
criCci6n a. en- una carta mace de sus
a-eatgras. E! sargento inglts Fred 5
Harris oye nor nm ,iempo fue pr!sio-
zero del encmigo La carta De Harris
Il ha reriyi6o 81 familia que reside
ac,au mrate en- Roodeport, Union de!
Africa 5eI Sur.
l;,r,. ., ,;da rrfv.d, as 90
Ia nm es,ahlacimi4nto dc impren-
pooJ.ror, q, pro III. los drcr-
,,,... i. p, ramar, de- Comcrcio de
....l,4 r.mo s,Ilado O.. MEM
l,.. al C,..n. j.. ~m..orirlissas i
.IaI ,,.osraI Nor
l., = J.. s.hrero rr5y,-
L,,.,,. mao ....;o, -, l.,
.,. IL. ,,aroc;rlistoe s,fr;o
Inooo,to - - rooandantA
o.. .. .orron. r.rirorr Corooel Fair
...-.,. ,..-,,I.a mr,.~,o q, s~,-ycr:o
IT,. r,,. be,.,o ,ris oner,
The fool-killer., 1917-01-01
- are hunting water, and I am full then watch it constantly for fear

then watch it constantly for fear
it will tangle up and break its
fool neck. It won't get into tia
garden and eat up all the young
beans just about the time you
were hoping to get a mess for
Sunday dinner. Any self-respect--
ing hay-stack will have more
manners than to drag its tail In
the barn-yard filth and then slap
it in your face while you are
milking. And it won't finder
away and kick you plum through
the fence and break down six
rows Of corn with you just be-
cause a fly bites it.
And-oh, happy thoughtful
you adopt the new plan and milk
a hay-stack instead Of a cow.
there will never be any more
wobbly-legged calves to hold off
and wean. That fact will tickle
the small boy whose chief temp
tation to commit suicide and 20 to
an easier world has been the
dreaded arrival Of q new calf.
Rejoice, o people, and be- glad,
You lived to see this day:
Go sell old Sooky right at once
And buy q stack Of hay.
The fool-killer., 1917-01-01
A SERMON ON RAT-TRAPs.

The Public Health Service at
Washington is making an official
collection of rat-traps.
So says a news item.
All right.
1t does me good to see our
solemn statesmen taking an inter-
est in rat-traps.
They already have on hand a
collection of several hundred and
sixteen varieties, ranging in ap-
pearance all the way from a Nc
Cormick reaper to q left-handed
thimble.
And that reminds me.
I am the sole owner of a rat
trap that ought to be in the gov
ernment's collection. ...a
I bought it from an agent last
week.
The agent was a very beautiful
young man.
His smile stuck out three feet
on each side Of his face, and he
also had his tongue with him.
This altogether charming young
buck came staving into my think
atorium one morning last week,
throwed "Howdy!" at me from
Che front steps, but I lodged and
it broke out a back window.
Then he opened his sample.
vase and began to run off at the
1neu6 % 1ellows.
The fool-killer., 1917-01-01
NOW is THE TINE TO SUBSCRIBE.

The editors gone out to forage for
news, /.
And now is the time to subscribe;
He needs a new coat and some
breeches and shoes,
And now is the time to subscribe.
He's also in need Of some butter and
bread
TO fill up the hole that he has In his
head,
For eve poor editors have to be fed,
And now is the time to subscribe.
The editor works when the reader g
asleep,
And now is the time to subscribe;
And the trouble he has would make
anyone weep,
And now is the time to subscribe.
He praises a man that he knows is a
skunk,
And doesn't say q word when the
deacon gets drunk,
And out of it all he gets nary q
PUNK,
And now is the time to subscribe.
He goes into debt for his paper and
ink,
And now is the time to subscribe;
And he can't keep away from old
poverty's brink,
And now is the time to subscribe.
He digs up for rations and rollers and
rent
Till all Of his poor little portion Is
spent,
And the burned advertiser won't pay
him a cent,
And now is the time to subscribe.
The fool-killer., 1917-01-01
IN TOUGH LUCK.

A farmer writing to us, tells
his "tale of woe" as follows:
cts scarcely any wonder that
lines are on my brow: it's hard
to make a living as things are
goin' now; I plant nice potatoes
and sit down to watch them grow,
then comes a frost a wooping and
lays the blame thing low. I plant
some little seedlets to raise some
succotash: my neighbours hen
came calling and knocked them
all to smash. I had a
pretty arbor in which to snooze
and rest; a COW came in and
climbed it and sent it galley west,
II bought a dozen egglets (they
cost SO much I cried; J they hatch
ed a lonely chicken-it went away
and died. The insects ate the
cabbage; the worms have nailed
my corn; my sheep are wild and
woolly; my COW has lost a horn
my pig has got the measles and
lseusals unsesIaly tA@ my gees>
The fool-killer., 1917-01-01
Wan

Man that is born of woman il
Of few days and full of microbes.
Sorrow and headache follow
him all the days Of his life.
He hoppeth from his bed i'm
the morning and his foot is
pierced by the tack of .disap-
pointment.
He stitch himself down to
rest at monday, and is lacerated
in his neither anatomy by tho
pin Of disaster.
He walketh through the streets
Of the city in the pride and
glory Of his manhood, and Slip
peth on the banana peel Of mis-
fortune and unjointeth his neck.
He is stung by the mosquitoes
Of annoyance by day and his
frame is gnawed by the bedbugs
Of affection at night.
What is man but the blind
worm of fate?-seeing that his
days are numbered by cycles OF
pain and his years by seasons Of
mourning.
In his infancy he runneth over
with worms and collie, and
in his old age he groaneth with
rheumatism and ingrowiug toe
nails.
he marrieth a cross-eyed wo-
man because her father hath
a bank account, and fndeth she
is ridden with hysteria and be-
lieved in witches.
He exalteth himself among
the people and swelleth with
pride, but when the votes are
counted he fndeth that he was
not In it.
He trusteth In q man who
claimeth to be filed with right
eousness and standeth high In
the synagogue, and gets done up.
For behold his pfous friends
are full Of guile and runneth over
with deception.
From the cradle to the grave
man giveth his aims to him that
smiteth him.
His seed multiplieth around
him and crieth for bread, and ID
his sons come to honor he know
eth it not.
What is man but a painfhl
wart On he heel efs6ms.
The fool-killer., 1917-01-01
Mister Editor Man

"Hello, Mister Editor Man,
doggon your old skin, I've just
dropped in to sell you a rat-trap.
Every well-ordered home needs a
rat-trap, and / feel that I am do
ing humanity a great service by
introducing this wonderful inven-
ton. Of course you are awful busy
swatting the fools, but you cant
afford to miss this opportunity Of
seeing my sample. It is certainly
the greatest invention Of the age.
You see how the fabigator is built
with q gollyding at each end, and
when these gollydings come in
slamifcation with the jiggerbob
it causes the squeezemgood to
open just under the meat-skin,
and that forces the .squeal-stick
into the die-hole, and if the rat
has sense enough to be in the
right position it will sure get him.
"The construction of this trap
is based on the new theory Of
science that all rats have a
thorough knowledge Of engineer
ing and mechanics, coupled with
the patience of Job and a stub
born determination to get killed.
This, my dear sir, is what we call
the Safety rat-trap. 1t won't
work at all without the hearty
cooperation Of the rat. The sur
est way to get results is to have
three rats work together, forming
a sort of suicide club. One rat
will say his prayers and crawl
into the thing; a second rat will
give the signal and a third rat will
throw the trap. In this way a
colony of rats could manage to ex-
terminate themselves by working
at it long enough. While this is
the surest plan, I Am also authori-
zed to state that any rat possess
ing the intellect Of Herbert
Spencer or Thomas A. Edison,
and being positively bent on sui
eide, could probably manage to
get himself killed in one Of these
contrapshuns."
"What will you charge to con-
fer this great blessing on me and
my posterity?" I asked in breath
less eagerness.
"Only one hundred dollars" he
replied, very sweetly.
I grabbed my pen and wrote
him a check for five hundred, and
%thrusting it into his hands, | kiss.
ed him and very afectionately
kicked him out into the road. :
The fool-killer., 1917-01-01
| - HOMEMADE
/ X@Hm a-O-o'
|k1A
zKNMAMNG by
James LARKN PEARSON
PROFIT AND LOSS.

Some folks are always so afraid
That they'll get cheated in a trade,
They'll waste q dollars worth Of time
In figuring to save o dime.
While others, lest q bargain slip,
Will run and grab 1t the first clip,
TO ind, when they have got their
wind,
That they've been very nicely
skinned.
The fool-killer., 1917-01-01
K A HAY-STACK..

~ 49, 4A0 ~@~~A
waukee company has been incorpor-
substitute for milk, which in brief is
to be milk prepared direct from hay
without the Intervention Of a COW.
The new company Is to operate un-
der q chemical formula which permits
Of the transmutation Of good timothy
hay into ash and milk, without pass
ing through the seven OF 80 stomachs
Of a bovine critter and being convert
ed by sundry processes into fluid
for drinking.
The advantage It is said, is not only
in simplifying the production, from
which 1t does not differ In taste, but
In the fact that the manner OF It's
production makes It always sweet as
1t Is free from the souring bacteria
which have to be Pasteurized to
preserve natures milk.
Great caesar up q pumpkin
vinel
What do you think Of that,
Rastus3
Now what will become Of poor
old Sooki
Bless her old bones, SIZE did
the best she could, but google
eyed Science has laid it across
her at last.
She will now have to ramble
off into the Southern swamps
and live on bulhushes and South
wind.
One by one we outgrow the old
institutions Of nature and shove
them aside to make room for
more improved machinery.
The horse was all right in his
day and time, and even the meek
eyed mule was not to be grinned
at, but they all had TO skeedaddle
when the steam locomotive and
the gasoline chug-wagon came
snorting along.
And the COW laughed at the
old horse and said:
20 yes, old Teller, they don't
Ineed you any more, but they
never could get along without me.
I am the chief cornerstone of
| the American home and the
strong right arm of the butter
trust"
And she winked at the bull
through the fence-crack and went
on licking her calf.
But that was in the past.
Things are different now.
Poor old Sock has learned by
bitter experience that pride goeth
before a fall. She must now be
relegated to the curiosity depart
ment, along with the horse and
the setting hen, and be remem
bered only as a creature that ha.
had her day.
But while we drop a tear O.
sympathy for the departing glory
Of her coWship, we must not for
get that her loss is our eterna
gain.
Henceforth we will milk q hay
stack. And we can't deny that |
hay-stack, as a milk-producer
has some decided advantages
over an old COW. IF you neve:
, milked a hay-stack it may seen
a bit awkward at first, but 20,
will soon get used to it.
Z Just to mention them of-hand
; here are a few Of the advantage
I have in mind:
In the first place, a hay-stacl
Twill not require as much atten
Z 1 0 - - III - VOr -1r3
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1917-09-05
DAMS PET MAXIMS

Dear old Daniel Gilfethsr OF Balboa
has a few pet maZims- Here they
are
Never encourage a woman. Toll
crate her.
Never judge an actor by his ward
robe
Never reveal YOUR thoughts 10 a
woman.
Time spent IN the company OF
books is well spent
Overcome petty miudedness. Gull
tivate broad miuGeduess
When your eyes behold the worst
IN humanity place only the kindliest
construction on IT,
The difference between an inter
esting book and an interesting Wom-
an is not so great after all.
Ascribe no evil thought Of inteu-
ton that you would not harbor in
your own mind
Il would rather be able 20 read
human nature than books"
Guess he's a bachelor all right