davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1917-10-12
And the Jokesmith Dodoed.

They were discussing that Joke
about getting down off an elephant.
"How do you get DOWN. asked the
jokesmith for the fourth time.
"You climb down."
"Wrongi"
"You grease his sides and slide
down."
"Wrongi"
"You take ladder and get down."
"Wrongw
'Well, you take the trunk line
down."
mo, not quite. You don't get down
Off an elephant: you get it off a goose
indianapolis News.
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1917-10-12

A length of cable 1870 feet long
was required for the job. 1t took a
sand-scow, a tugboat and light
draft tug eight days to lay the cable,
which weighed about ninety tons.
Seventy-four pairs OF wires were run
through the big tube, and the people
on both sides Of the river can now
hold Submarine" conversation just as
though there was not several miles
of water between telephones.
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1917-10-12
Hit Close to Home.

The following story was told by an
officer stationed at Seaford:
A rather simple-looking young re-
cruit was seemingly bewildered by the
maze of cross-questioning he was be-
ing subjected to. Then came the ques
ton concerning the allotment of al.
lowances.
"Next Of kim" asked the officer
sharply.
The recruit dropped his voice and
became confidential.
I'm only wearing a vest. sir" he
replied. my shirts at the wash."-
London Answers.
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1917-10-12
A'baS-The Flv SWatter!

That favorite weapon of offense and
defense. the fly swatter. is in the minds
Of many imaginative people about as
disagreeable as the fly itself. Let's go
back to the reliable sticky fly paper
which accounts for Its thousands with
out any effort other than putting out
fresh sheets twice week.
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1917-10-12
oh, Dear!

Aunt Elvira rushed into the house
hysterical.
1--WE lost my hearingi" she shouted
you have?" her frightened sister
shouted back ''how do you know?"
'See that man out there playing that
hand organ2 Well, can't hear a
single note !" and Aunt Elvira wept
afresh.
That's moving picture photogra.
pher at work !" snapped her sister.
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1917-10-12
So Many Are Like That

"Were the eggs
you got from the
grocer f-r e s h z
Mrs. X a W ! e +
asked.
"Oh, obsolete
ly," replied Mrs.
Blunderby.
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1917-10-12

Six months! exclaimed the chief
American engineer. Why, we hope
In the train going up to Paris"
The French reporter adds, rubbing
1t in: "rhe next day laborers were
on the spot, beginning the work"
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1917-10-12
SOME SMILES
OBSERVATION-DISCLOSURES
When Brother Tells,

Mr.. Goodthing-
How does your
sister like the en-
gagement ring ]
gave her, Bobby7
H e r Y ou n <
BrOther-Well, It's
a little too small ;
she has an awful
hard time getting
1t off when the
other fellows call,
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1917-10-12
A Relief.

This war Is going to make many
women here widows"
well, perhaps. some OF the women
will be very glad there Is a way to do
1t legally"
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1917-10-12
Mountainous Friendship

Belle-Jack thinks in marrying
Gladys he is going to get an angel
BY the way, who at the wedding Is go
ing to give her away?
Nell could, but l won't.
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1917-10-12

Among the latest sanitary appliances
for public eating places is a spoon
pressed from paper that can be thrown
away after using.
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1917-10-12
An Approval.

"What l object to about The Star
Spangled Banner Is that / wouldn't
attempt to sing It,"
That's one of the things like about
It,"
The Oakley herald. [volume] (Oakley, Idaho) 1908-1961, 1917-10-12

There are nearly half million Ital-
fans near Bueaos Aires In the Argen-
tine.
The Washington herald., 1917-05-30
u. S. EXPORTS SUFFER
under U-BOAT WARFARE
Commerce Report Shows Great Falling
of Since January.

The ravages OF ruthless U-boat war
fare are shown partially in the monthly
report of the Department Of Commerce
on American foreign trade. issued yes
terday. In January. Just before Ger
many started her unrestrained compaign.
the exports were s613, 100000. By March
the total had fallen to 1854, 100000. and in
April the total was $3.50, 100000. This was
SS3 OO0 900 less than in January.
Despite these figures the exports OF
the United States, for the first time in
the history OF the country, exceeded
Sc 600 100000 in the twelve months ending
with April. This is against less than
81 900, 100000 in the same period OF 1916
and s., 500 OO0, 900 or less in previous years.
While no figures will be issued for a
few days, it is known that the export
trade with Canada. Mexico, Central and
South America have increased greatly so
that the decreases I'm exports to Europe,
caused by the U-boat. are greater than
the above totals indicate.
For the ten months ending with April
the exports amounted to $5,167, 900, 900
against S3,S94.O00,O00 one year ago and
81, 225, 100000 two years ago.
The imports during April amounted Ia
S254 Co., 900, which with the single eXcep-
ton Of March. is the record month OF
the last six years. The excess Of ex-
ports over imports amounted to $3.50,
10000 in the twelve months ending with
April, against $1,914.OOO,OoO in 1916 and
$S4S. 10000 in 1914
The Washington herald., 1917-05-30
GREEK SECRETARY HERE
OUT FOR VENIzELOS
Legation Officer Resigns Post Because
King Is Policeman.

when a nation begins to sink hos
pital ships, murder women and chill
dren and use its dead for fertilizer it
is time for all decent men to turn their
faces away
This was the comment g. x. Constan-
tinidI, first secretary OF the Greek lega-
tion here, made yesterday on Germany
as he resigned his post because his king
has arraigned himself on the side of
German barbarity and infamy"
ConStantinidi, in presenting his papers
OF resignation to the State Department
announced his allegiance to the Venize-
los government and declared It the
duty Of every humane and honest man
to align himself on the side of America
and tho entente"
U. S. May Recognize VenIEeIoA
In connection with the diplomats action
II was learned at the State Department
that serious consideration is being given
by this country to the question of recog-
nizing the Venizelos government. 1t was
declared that action Is withheld for the
moment merely because the situation in
Greece shows some signs OF improve
ment but that despite this Venizelos
might be recognized as a de facto presi-
dent in the territory held by his forces.
Economic and military pressure brought
to bear by our allies on King Constan-
tine OF GTeece mas resulted IN a consid-
cradle change Of front by that monarch,
1t was said The entente blockade of
Greece is still in full operation, and has
had the effect of tanning the pro-German
ruler.
France and England already have REQ
ognized Venizelos as the head of the de
facto government around Saloniki. Sert-
Gus consideration is still being given the
question of deposing King Constantine
unless he meets our allies demands.
The question OF concerted action on
Greece by the United States with our
allies was taken up at the recent con-
fercnces with the French and British
missions here, but is still undecided.
The United States, for the moment, will
play a lone hand, it is understood. but
If Constantine again proves unruly and Is
set down. this country Is expected to
follow any action France and England
may take.
The Washington herald., 1917-05-30
HOUSEWIVES DAILY
ECONOMY CALENDAR
Be Adaptable.
BY FRANCES MARSHALL

One OF the most interesting thinrs
about housekeeping, about the game OF
food planning, Is that It is necessary to
be adaptable If you are to win It.
For instance, take potatoes. We hav.-
in the last few months grown used to
looking upon potatoes are a luxury. We
have gaily called them diamonds, and we
have cheerfully substituted rice and
speghetti for them.
But before we know It, potatoes NAV
be cheap. And then the truly proEree-
sive-and that means, nowadays. the
truly patriotic-housekeeper will learn 10
use potatoes literally. She will substitute
potatoes for white flour, when she can
for potatoes and white flour both con-
tain much starch, and there is little like
lihood that white flour will 20 back to
normal standing for a long time
And as 1t may be with potatoes 40 Il
may be with other food commodIties
Nothing in the world stands still-Ieast n,
all do conditions in the food market.
wherein steadily changing crops create
steadily changing conditions.
So the housewife must keen abresst
of the times. She must learn to adapt
the cheap and seasonable foods to the
needs of her family.
Perhaps never in the history of the
world has housekeeping been SO tr1IIv
interesting as it is now. For now there
is a real problem to be solved, and in tba
careful solving Of It lies a real service
of patriotism and loyalty. And anv worlT
that in its accomplishment surnounts q
difficult obstacle is interesting.
OF course. in the past housewives hav.
the problem Of high food prices ana
scanty supplies to deal with. There have
been wars and famines always. Rut naya-
before has the housewife faced her 70 sI
so well equipped as she is now, Never he
fore has she had so much helm as sha
has from scientific authorities, Neyer
before has the conserving and d,s-
tributing and preparing Of the worId's
food supply been recognized as on ~
the most important problems IN the vyI6s
world.
And the housewife, Of course. "a a, -.
end the one person on whom ali the D1o-iS
depends. For boards of inyestir. A.. lu
may investigate and committees oF ~
perimenters may experiment ana scbooI.
and colleges and government depa rtr,snts
may work out economical means 80
methods; but II the housewife DOE. ,n.
follow the way pointed out by these t-sS
blazers, the world may yet starvs ''ti
Copydght isT7)
The Washington herald., 1917-05-30
no SUGAR SHORTAGE,
SAY CUBAN OFFICIALS
1917 Production Placed at 100000
Tons-Nearly Equals 1916 Crop.
Special TO The Washington Herald.

Special TO The Washington Herald.
New York, May 2S.-There win be no
sugar shortage this year. the Cuban gov
ernment's official estimate of the sugar
crop shows. The seasons production is
placed at 2,s0o.0Oo tons, second only to last
years crop in the history OF the island.
The governments statement was issued
by Eusebio s. Azpiazu, private secretary
to President Menocal. and transmitted by
cable last night to the Republic OF Cuba
News Bureau in this city. The bureau
said It will set at rest the alarmist re-
ports which indicated that the profits of
the principal sugar companies would be
more or less curtailed."
That the reserve stocks on hand are
less than last years" the bureau adds,
Indicates. too. that the present price
levels, due to the proved economic con-
ditions, must necessarily be maintain
ed. With the weather continuing ia
vorable, as 1t has in the past three
months and more. the marketing of
the crop will proceed with the utmost
facility"
The original estimate for the sugar
crop this year was 100000 tons. The
insurrection. however. prevented that
figure from being reached.
The Washington herald., 1917-05-30
PITTSBURGH OFFICIALS
MEET BODY OF GUTHRIE

Pittsburgh. May 29.-The body of
George w. Guthrie. former mayor of
Pittsburgh and former ambassador to
Japan, who died recently in Toxic, ar
rived IN Pittsburgh on special train
from San Francisco early today.
Accompanying the body were Mrs.
Guthrie, other members OF the Guthrie
family, and representatives Of the State.
War and Navy Departments.
Mayor Armstrong, with other CITY ofd-
cials. met the funeral party In the sta
ton. a squad of police and fremen acted
as an escort Of honor. when the body
was taken to the undertaking rooms. The
body will lie in state In the Soldiers
Memorial Hall tomorrow afternoon.
japanese Ambassador Sato WIN coma
from Washington to attend tha frneroI
services on Thursday.
The Washington herald., 1917-05-30

A new interest Is what most of US
need when the brain is jaded and
wearied with monotony and the body
needs exercise. l love to come across
new words. and study the meaning OF
them-1 mean the roots and how they
were formed. And 1 heard some one
say the other day that what a GER
tain man lacked in the elements that
make for success was coordination.
The whole machine must work in
harmony" he explained. We're Just
machines after all, fine ones like
watches, but machines, and II the diff
ferent parts don't work together,
there's trouble. That's ALL
So I began to study the man they
said lacked coordination. He had
been very good. capable, high priced
actor in his day. Now he was on the
outskirts, as II were. trying a job
here and there at various studios. and
falling. He was such a delightful old
fellow. He looked like Henry Irving,
with wonderful manners and q way OF
wearing shabby clothes that made
them royal He could tell such good
stories of the past, stories Of famous
actors and actresses he had played
with: that you never tired listening
to him. People liked him around the
studios, but he was never on time.
II don't like watches" he confded
to me. They always did annoy me
telling me to hurry up. And besides,
mine has been pawned this long whfls.
Time is only the noise the clock
makes, remember"
Now, that's all right as philosophy.
but 1 always did think that philosophy
required a private income TO make it a
real success Today you must be on
time and keep your appointments, or
some one who does respect the noise
the clock makes is going to step IN
ahead of you.
Then again. I found that the old
fellow lived in the past entirely. He
The Washington herald., 1917-05-30

never knew anything about the cur
rent topics Of today, but he'd tell you
any time anecdotes Of Booth and Bar
rett, or when Charlotte Cushman
played in Boston, and Of how the elder
Salvini took the people by storm when
he came over. And worse than that,
he was not one bit interested in any
body but himself It was as II he
floated around in a little enchanted
cloud OF reminiscence that shut him
off from the outer world completely.
Hes on the wrong track" said
Tony, one OF the studio boys, one day.
He wants TO break some new brain
trails"
I knew right away that he had
struck the right nail on the head. One
Of the great secrets OF success was CO.
ordination, being in harmony with
your environment. too, so mat YOU
were not forever cIashing with IT This
dear old fellow was jsngling all the
time on a different set Of chords, so
he failed to fit into the symphony OF
happy work together.
And right on top OF this got q
letter from a girl in the South, who
wrote. so she said, for an old actor, living
at the same place she did. Such a de-
hghtful letter it was. showing how COM
pletely he had kept in touch with the
world Of today, and delighted in all that
we younger ones were doing and achiev-
Ing. I am sure he is a regular scout
as the boys say. breaking new trails Of
interest for himself and others all the
time and keeping himself young that
way.
:. We used to make believe. when we
were children that We were taking care
OF mother. and that she was the littlest
one; and sometimes now ! almost think
It has come true. for we are all deep in
our work and Lottie in her home interests
and the baby, but mother is forever get
til happiness and fun out OF new things
She did the cutest thing when we were
The Washington herald., 1917-05-30

East must tell II. for Il may civ,
somebody else an idea
We met a friend on Broadway who ssf5
his wife had been in all winter lonE. and
he knew they would have TO get away
from New York where she could nnd
new interests
Are you doing well. Joe asked moth
er, casually. and he said he waA Well
II she didn't 20 up 20 see Mrs Joe, and
find her propped up on a couch, IN an old
silk negllge, her hair half tumblinF down
and reading some book on the war
Mother promptly had her send for her
dressmaker and all the new pattern
books. samples from her favorite store,
and a masseuse and hair dresser. wheu
Mr.. Joe came home that night he found
his wife standing on a stool being pinned
up IN new gown. and looking mighty
pert.
Gee. but you're good medicine" he
told mother. As n we didn't know that
She's the best tonic in the world
The Washington herald., 1917-05-30
Kentucky Bore Brunt
Of Mid-Western Storm

Chicago, May 29.-Kentucky. with 1a
persons dead, bore the brunt OF The tor
nado which swept through seven States
according to revised figures today
The fatalities totaled SA Illinois today
reported "a deaths; Kansas. 20: Tennes-
see, Il; Alassfna, IS; Arkansas, 10: and
Indiana, Z.
The property loss win run into the mil
lions. and the number of injured Is vari-
ously estimated at from 1000 to 1 500
1t Will take H,ooo.o0o to rebuild the
devastated sections Of Mattoon. III, and
M09VOo 70 replace the wrecked buildings
ing to estimates of the mayors
The Washington herald., 1917-05-30
IOWAN SUGGESTS TAX
ON DOGS OF NATION
100000 Hounds, He Says, Could
Be Soaked S. A Head.

A. F. Bonney. OF Buck Grove, Iowa
put Congress wise yesterday to a source
Of revenue heretofore entirely overlooked
by the tax weasels Of the Federal gov
ernment.
He would have dogs pay their share Of
the war burden. His idea came to light
IN letter to the Senate, read into the
Record at the suggestion OF Vice Presi-
dent Marshall.
II your respected body would care to
raise q large amount Of revenue and at
the same time add Indirectly to the food
supply Of the country, while at the same
time inflicting no hardship on any one
tax dogSS a head on all boy dogs,
S25,0o0 a head on all females" He es-
timated there were 100000 dogs In the
country.
why not make them into sausage?"
suggested Senator Stone. when the clerk
finished reading the letter.
The Washington herald., 1917-05-30
M'MILLAN EXPEDITION
SAFE, PARTY CABLES
Crockerland Explorers Returning After
Long Journey in Arctic.


New York, May 29-The Macmillan
Crockerland exploration expedition is
safe, according to a cablegram from the
Shetland Islands received here this after
noon. A third relief ship expedition,
commanded by Capt. Bartlette, was to
have been sent soon by the American
Museum of Natural History to rescue the
marOoned explorers.
The Cablegram, reporting all members
safe, said Hunt is due soon at Copen-
hagen. Macmillan. Conner and Scot have
arrived Mt Etah, and Eltblow Is at Disco.
The steamer Denmark, sent to rescue the
men, wintered at North Star Bay.
The Macmillan expedition went TO the
Arctic in the summer of 1913 to look for
the new continent which Rear Admiral
Peary thought he had discovered and
which he named Crocker Land. The ex-
pedition was headed by DR.. Donald B,
Macmillan.
In the autumn OF 1918. Dr. Macmillan
sent back word that he had made a
sledge trip of $50 miles across the fee
in the direction of the supposed continent
without finding any trace OF land.
The Washington herald., 1917-05-30
Count Andrassy Asked
To Form New Cabinet

London. May 29.-Emperor Charles has
requested Count Andrassy to form a new
cabinet for Hungary, says a dispatch
from Vienna today.
Count Andrassy was formerly premier
Of Hungary and was leader OF the op-
position in the Hungarian Parliament
While he has long favored domestic re-
forms for Hungary. he is reported to
have been IN sympathy with a closer
union between Germany and the dual
monarchy.
The Washington herald., 1917-05-30
Answers to Correspondents

Anna 1.-THE recipe for caramel cake
appeared In a recent article Perhaps ]
DO not make Il like other people. Rs !
ike TO use the fudge filing which -
richer than the caramel. and a ms--h-
mslow whip on top.
Ruth M.-Francis Bushnan is with the
Metro Company, 8 West SiKty-frst street,
New York City. He was the Romeo With
Miss Bayue.
Bernice P.-Many thanks for vour
happy birthday wtshea Eleven years
does seem pretty old. doesn't It.
Lila H D-The little hand-painted card
is lovely. Thank you for remembering
me l think your work is very dainty.
Jessie B.-I always Ike TO receive per
sonsl opinions on my pictures. Am sorry
you did not like the Pride OF the Clan.
am very fond Of It The fishermen were
punished because they neglected their
kirk when the catch" came In. Don't
you think that was true to life. The
scene is not in the Highlands, but on an
island.
MARY PICKFoRD.
The Washington herald., 1917-05-30

Why how ddo Mrs Mggs2 Come right in. Mas t
Smiths minute boruh thread and mes and
ag A be right back Let's Spoe tn
sofa and I'll show yuh tn album yuh kinda begin of
folks We like be real nshboy and make folks feel
Thee we're fixed.
This here first ones when she little Amt Her
Uncle Seth kep Davenport and he her them fur Real
mink think
Turn over.
The Washington herald., 1917-05-30

At night herds Of bison used 10 assem-
bic in a ring. the cows and calves inside,
and the bulls standing guard against the
wolves.
The Washington herald., 1917-05-30

Apparatus that messages wonnen,s
their contour has been invented PfSVe
The Washington herald., 1917-05-30
HAS SEALED MESSAGE
FOR AMERICAN PEOPLE
Italian Prince, for King. VIII Present
1t Through Senate.


A sealed message from King Victor
Emanuel III OF Italy will be presented
TO the American people through the Sen
ate on Thursday at noon. The message
will be delivered to the president of the
Senate by Prince Udine, head of the
visiting italian mission.
The details OF the presentation were ar
ranged yesterday when Prince Udlne and
the members OF the mission called on
Vice President Marshall. The Vice Pres
ident received the visitors in his room
OF the Senate chamber, talking with
them for over fifteen minutes through
an interpreter. The prince was attired
in full uniform. and was attended by
his stan in uniform. Several members
Of the mission called on Speaker Clark
after their conference with Mr.. Mar
shall
The commission yesterday continued
its conference with American officials
over questions OF American assistance
and the international pool
Seeks General Cooperation.
ITALY has sent her representatives to
this couIlry not to ask anything In par
ticular Br herself, but only to seek the
fullest mutual cooperation, because the
weakening of any one nation means the
weakening OF all nations fighting Ger
many" That Is the way Francesca Sal
eric NittI, a member of the commission,
explained the purpose of the italian
government in sending its representatives
here.
Mr.. Nitti. who Is a famous economist,
says that the general campaign of the
German government contemplates starv-
ing England, keeping coal from Italy,
undermining the manhood of France, and
finally. by intrigue, to win Russia from
our allies.
The Washington herald., 1917-05-30
Daily Talks by Mary Pickford
BREAKING NEW TRAILS.


of fansatI
cation article
by special