davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1917-01-15
SlDELlGHTSUNNARM0VES
BERNARD SHAW ON PEACE TERMS.

IN the issue of The New Republic
fact be faced that Europe going
the remainder the duration OF this planet Germsy head head
have time for What really ought consider of the
alliance when the pressure under which was ve removed That pressure
erany and already
shown that the German Nobody suppo that Ger
shall of than Germany;
VIII he AFRAID will
her and that her fleet something
hitherto eolped by the military bsaboo will the world
world
man army two
"Ou victory demonstration that German victory
will knock
brace which the Tommy the Pou
Russian bear WILL from his grounds of Persia and Poland and
fought penny
fun or that OF Iapan much less of the two in alliance M
"a' re"ed youth for that the balance still
nov suddenly Ne weight
Germany the scales replace by burning feather without bringing
down the scale with crash that Jerk half tho weights OF
Our transient and place
soldier who short British pluck and Dutch
sun less have they place the diplomacy which alone supee the
diplomacy OF military power balancing Supnaona law when it comes will
not be nations will Mr. Cecil Cheterton proposal
establish class OF feeble minded curtacd
rights for punlerng and disabling Germany
Failing the establishment peratona law the will have to fall
powers II the bidding the power
aud more lie with the United States because they form the only single
val alliance with and will between
the and the will be Enpads that should
alliance Now the exclusion OF France Anglo German Ameri
combination would neither France the combination aud thu,
nucleus for civilization allied France Germany Britain
ana NGh AeTta Sneh combination would ano', instantly fe Inc
Russia Italy France and England desperate and unnatural adventure
from Germany Keeps together today Mr. Cecf Cbcseor caaonr o
destruction that danger also camorm the inevitable breakup
will appre-
the wisdom OF the old political Treat friend who
k,nd'"-G BS
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1917-01-15
THE CLASS IN GEOLOGY.

OUR good friends the oil men, authority for the
statement that the oil producers of Oklahoma have
paid SS0OO0O 10 the farmers OF this state for leases and
royalties, This is lot OF money and doubts the
statement.
Let us look little deeper into the subject and see
what tive find The class in geology will please rise and
answer questions;
Q.-What is anti-cne?
Al don't know, unless it is person who is agains,
paying taxes
Q-IIow cmuch money have the oil magnates of Okla
homa paid the farmers of the state for royalties and
leases'
reaches $5OO0OO
Q-Where did the oil men get this S5OOOONO2
r. Al don't remember. ~
Odd you learn that answer from John D Rock
efellcr'
Al forget
OF the oil men paid the farmers of Oklahoma the sun,
OF $500O0O00 did the oil men save this money from their
wages while working in New York or Mauch Chunk?
Al don't remember
O-lsnt it true that every the oil men have paid
the Oklahoma farmers in royalties was derived from selling
the oil which flowed from the land owned by the Okla
homa farmers?
Al don't remember
Q-Isn't it true that each time the 81 producer ha,
drilled hole farm produced oil and sold it, that he
retained $3.50 from 500 worth of oil and paid the
farmer $3.50 the royalty on the oil which the farmers
land produced'
Al don't remember
II the farmers Of Oklahoma wish to the gross pro-
ducton tax oil retained raised they should at once
communicate with their legislators, The oil men wish 70
reduce the oil In that event there every prospect
of deficiency in the funds which will advance
in the taxation Of the farm.
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1917-01-15
RIppIINdRHYNES
BDNdH MaSon
PESSIMISM.

SC\/OU'RE buying trouble when you
buy car" the old man said,
his gloomy face ajar I'D
rather walk as walked my patient sires
than stand in mud and fuss with busted
tires Whene'er you travel in your four
wheeled boat, all things conspire to
bear away your goat Your engine
balks, YOUR brakes refuse to hold. your
cooling system will not keep things
cold You find new grief no matter
where you roam; you must hire mules
to haul your tumbrl home" "Oh.
Sage ] said what is there on this
earth that won't bring grief. however
great its WORTH You drive horse,
when YOU would Journey hence, and
now and then it kicks you through a
fence You have a vile, whom doubt
less YOU adore, bu, now and then she
makes your spirit sore. You like good
grub, but when YOU cat too much. your
crippled stomach clamors for a crutch.
Why Gu, out honey. il we like 1t, friend,
because the bee is loaded at one end
Go to, old man Though all the dotards
dote, he is chump who does not own
boat !"
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1917-01-15
OILINC THE HIGHWAYS.

IN a number of highways in this state the use of crude
oil has been found to be satisfactory. And the actual
pouring OF the crude stuff on roads brings suggestion
from who would go several steps further than the
/ actual oiling of the highways He would divert very
considerable part of the tax the gross production OF
oil and it to build good roads thus "oilng the high
ways" figuratvcly
The present tax the gross production of oil in Okla
homa is pary three percent Ii We produce as much
oil in 1917 did last year in this state and the price
averages $0 per barrel then the three percent tax will
bring of more than SsO0O0OO
There many persons who incline to the belief that
gross production tax of five percent oil would be an
equitable system of taxation II this percent should be
established, then the basis of the production as nd-
Gated above the public purse would be aened the tune
Of about S8,OO00O0 per annum.
Here is where the advocates of good roads along
with their proposals They point that of this snug
OF 100000 many expenses of the govenrch could
be paid and still permit few million dollars each year 20
be used in building good roads all oklahoma
II is expected that the farmers of this will be
rather vigorous in writing the farmer members of the
legislature to that this important subject be kept we'll
to the 'front.' and that the efforts which may be made to
decrease tho gross production be resisted with
ter proposition to boost the rate from three percent
to five percent that the farmers may have system OF
highways without being burdened with taxes to pay in
these roads
One good roads enthusiast declares that the quicker
create this road fund the will the federal good roads
funds be available to Oklahoma In other words If we
show Uncle Sam that have big road fund the
opuent gentleman at Washington will put much of the
national wealth into the fund initiated by Oklahoma.
Oil natural resource The who taps this hidden
wealth and gets the benefit Of il should be willing
reasonable portion of it to the people and relieve the
farmer in other part of the state who be paying
little bit than his share Of taxation.
The farmer members of the Legislature can well give
careful thought to this idea OF ong the highways with
the millions of taxes which will be available from sub
stantial gross production tax.
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1917-01-15
THE POULTRY SHOW

DROUD roosers and stately hens will be the principal
characters in the drama of The Poultry Show" which
opened today Wes Main street The finest birds in
more than half dozen states will compete for
the prizes offered by the local association
Interest in poultry is gaining; the high price Of eggs
has caused families resolve that they will engage
in the raising of fowls small scale first and upon
larger plan after the perplcxites OF the industry have
been mastered
The poultry show should be well patroniled The
who have labored faithfully without pay to make this
show entitled TO the support of those who
believe in aiding every legitimate enterprise.
Just how big the poultry industry of Oklahoma is at
this time is known. But hundreds of carloads of fat
fowls and fresh eggs roll of this each year to
supply the tables of fadious And homeiok thrive
on the same products
Let us give the poultry show Endorsement by attend
ing than general response the invitation
which is extended by the management will be distinct aid
in developing industry which is TO add great riches to
Oklahoma.
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1917-01-15
HAVE YOU ANY OLD CLOTHING? :?

VXJHEN the thermometer made effort, last week to dive
" for records and the gas pressure sank we were
again reminded that there few people who are suffer
ing discomfort, by of soany clothing to wear and
for beds.
There ought to be several hundred amilie. In this city
who have clothing which Is discarded in the attic or the
garage other place of storage Also there is prob
ably some bedding hid away Why get all these things
out and telephone to the Providen association to call for
theml
Well have few weeks of sharp winter weather before
the glad sprngme reaches this locality and in the mean
time the clothing which has been put out of commission
will keep few families when the chill blasts of
February sweep down hrough7the section near the river
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1917-01-15
Luke McLuke SAYS.

A girl gets Jus, as mad when a
strange man adfnlres her as she does
II he fails TO notice her
You can easily patch up a quarrel
But it isn't easy to keep the patches
from showing.
II you could only ge: married WON
en- to believe that being good dnatured
improves the complexion lot OF mar
ried men would be happier than they
are.
A burned child breads fire. But a
man will go and get married a second
time.
One thing we can all agree on is that
the Other Fellow ought to be satisfied
with what he has.
Somehow or other nobody ever kids a
big, broad Shouldered athletic, brown
skinned, military looking guy because
he is wearing wris, watch.
II man doesn't like another man,
he knocks the other man behind his
back But he doesn't rush up TO him
and kiss him when he sees him on the
street How about IT, ladies,
The fact that woman hates to have
her husband out Of her sight does not
necessarily indicate that he i' such a
good husband Maybe its Just the re-
verse
There is an awful difference between
Complexion that won't come off and
a Blush that won, come off.
This is a wonderful country No
matter how cold it gets, there is always
plenty OF hot air in circulation.
A single man imagines that after he
gets married he will have a right to
spend a part OF the money he earns.
Rut he learns better after he gets mar
rled
OF course it would be cruel and un-
Just But our idea of fitting pun
ishment Tor Mexicans captured by our
troops would be to make them take \
bath once a week
Our idea Of reckless courage would
he for a man to tell the mother OF a
new baby Just exactly what he thinks
OF It.
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1917-01-15

The clerk was up to his ears in
parasols. He was good salesman, had
a rare command OF language, and knew
how to expatiate on the best points OF
the goods he sold. As he picked up a
parasol from lot on the counter and
opened it, he struck an attitude of ad
miration and said;
Nov. there Look at that silk
Isn't II lovely2 Particularly observe
The quality, the finish. the general ef-
feet, Feel it. Pass your hand over il
No nonsense about this parasol, is
there"
"No," said the lady, 1T has worn
well. That is my old one, just laid
il down here"
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1917-01-15

Some fine day in the future well find that the oil
wells of Oklahoma exhausted, like they are in some
places down east And look back a, the pittancc
which received in the way of taxing the industry
will wonder iooshnesS in surenderng this natural
resource and getting only fraction of it for the public
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1917-01-15

A few days after a farmer had sold q
pig to neighbor he chanced 10 pass
the neishbors place and saw the own.
er's son sitting on the edge Of the pig
pen watching the new occupant.
How do you do, Johnny" said ha
"How's your pig todayI"
"Oh. pretty well, thank YOU" replied
the little boy. "How's all your folks 7"
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1917-01-15

There has been well defined opinion that many gas
wells viewed by their yaecss on account
OF locations points where demand existed for the stuff
but magnac had been able pede the contents
OF gas well in Oklahoma City late Saturday afternoon
lie could have changed his pennies into dollars in jig time
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1917-01-15
Located.

J. 6 h OF Boston. Mass, has com
pletcd Lukc'S search for the old-iash-
ioned girl who used to wear a Shin
my" He says that she lives at Steep
Falls, Maine, because. while passing
that town on train he saw one OF the
animals hanging on a clothslne.
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1917-01-15

Who knows how many million dollars worth OF oil
pumped OF Oklahoma before displayed the
wisdom OF eyying this natural III which
the public has proprietary interest Didn't We let many
million dollars of oil tax money slip away? And we
going to permit the gross production tax to remain at the
petty figure of percent
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1917-01-15
Our Daily Birthday Party.

Virgil G.. Hinshaw. chairman Of the
prohibition national committee, born At
Woolson, Iowa, forty-one years ago
today.
Brig. Gen. Charles G.. Morton, In
command Of divisional headquarters at
FL Paso, born fifty-six years ago to-
day
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1917-01-15
Some Family.


Miami (FlaD Herald
Mr. Flanders and his family have not
yet reached here from Detroit, but will
arrive about January l. She is 65 feet
in length and y feet wide.
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1917-01-15

Telegraphic advces tell of the purchase by John d
Rockefeller of another piece of New York real estate at
cost OF several millions of dollars How John d a
ford this when the oil producers charging him increased
prices for crude oil?
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1917-01-15

One legislator, whose have happily forgotten
has introduced bill which provides for the inspection
Of monasteres and Here is another reason why
most of the people would abolish the legislature
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1917-01-15
Holesome.

Il never could eat doughnuts.
Remarked John Henry brood
And yet ] must agree with YOU
That they are wholesome food "
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1917-01-15

You often meet man named Short
who is tall, and YOU meet men named
Long who are short. And we once
knew a man named lean who was lat,
and man named Fatt who was thin.
So that YOU can see that there isn't
anything IN name But what we
started to say was that Shurly Stout
lives at Plain City, Ohio.
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1917-01-15

PA, does the legislature make laws that its members
want does pass laws that the people WANT" inquired
wise boy the east side of town The boy is still wait
ing for an answer
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1917-01-15
Huh

Talking about the eternal fitness OF
things, VIII Tank has been employed
BY the Bridgewater Mass police to
obtain evidence against speakeasies by
buNlng beer and ale.
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1917-01-15
Paw Knows EVERYTHING.

Willie-Paw, is necessity the mother
OF invention
Paw-Yes my son.
Willic-Well, who is the father
Paw-Thomas Edison, think my
son,
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1917-01-15
Mercy!

Iiit,ie McGinn and Lcttic Malone
used to be neighbors on West Second
street Chillcothc, Ohio, but Mchitabel
couldn't stand the gait and moved away
from l.c,itia.
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1917-01-15
That's Strangel
Mean RIutel
Betcha

said old Mr.. Burt,
And he was quite meek:
"A cuff on n shirt
Beats one on the beak." "
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1917-01-15

NJ. Six, the b. and o. day ticket agent
at Wheeling, W Va, goes to work at
Six A. NJ.
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1917-01-15
N Otice
Oh /!

Jay Bird of Jeico, Tenn. has beer
admitted at tho clubs aviary.
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1917-01-15
Gosh I

MANY Shallow Man Has Dee
Voice.
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1917-01-15
Our Joe Miller Contest.

Charles Palm. Columbus, Ohio,
claims that the Oldest Joke is the one
about the German who built the dog
house for his two dogs, one a St. Ber-
nard and the other a dachshund. and.
in order to accommodate both dogs, he
put in large door and a small door
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1917-01-15

Mehby YOU didn't know il, and mebby
you don't care a hoot But, ANYWAY. A.
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1917-01-15

One Hundred Year, Aso Today.


l8l7-Theodore s. Parvin. founder Of
the Iowa State Teachers association
and an educator and librarian OF wide
reputation, born at Cedarville, \. J.
Seventy Years Ago Today.
iAl-Joseph Hopkinson. author Of
Hail Columbia" died in Philadelphia.
Born there. Nov u, lT0
Fifty Years Ago Today.
l&7-More than forty skaters were
drowned by the breaking OF the ice in
Regents park, London
Twenty-Five Years Ago Today.
l892-Woman's Suffrage association
met in Washington, with Susan B. An
thony, Lucy Stone and Elizabeth Cady
Stanton among those in attendance.
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1917-01-15
EUKF;M:L.UKE
Ills COLUMN
Copyright 1~7

Mug.
A homely man Is Daniel Dugg,
His face would scare q cop:
And Yet he has "A handsome mug,
It's In the barber shop.
The Wise Fool
There is no such thing as safe
bet observed the Sage.
How about the bet YOU were going
20 make and didn't" asked the Fool.
That's Strangel
The walters wise, viii agree,
Wen balanced. too, IN bet.
Yet, n do not tip him, he
Is sure TO be upset,
Mean Brute
Didn't YOU like that novel asked
you to read?" asked Mrs Gabb.
Nav" growlcd Mr. Gabb. don't
like story unless it ends happily
But that story ends happily" insist
ed Mrs Gabb.
"No, i, doesn't" growled Mr.. Gabb.
The hero and The heroine get married
in the last chapter"
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1917-01-15

An Optimist.
With gout my legs
are puffed." soid Reed;
I'm glad I'm not
\ centipede."
Luke McLuke.
My throat's sore"
Said old man Raft;
I'm glad that
Am no giraffe"
Detroit Free Press
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1917-01-15
Obs ToRlDS:
.INNEWTYpH
Twenty Years Ago.
from Lhe TINES PILES

Twenty Years Ago.
George 6. Sohlberg went to Ardmor(
today.
John Shartel of Guthrie wa. in tswr
today.
Mrs. S J. Hasgall returned from
Guthrie last night
Byron Shear and R. N. Mcconnell
went to Guthrie today.
Messrs. Frick. Storm and S,reeter
went to Guthrie today to attend the
Territorial Hardware Dealers associa-
tlon.
Taz Upshaw returned this afternoon
from Guthrie.
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1917-01-15

Fifteen Years Ago.
Mines Upshaw and Darling will en-
tertan a company OF their friends with
dance. to be gwen tonight in the |
opera house
A fine granitoid sidewalk is being
laid in front of the Scott building on|
Main street today. which adds much
to its appearance.
At 2 o'clock this afternoon the Rev.
w, F. Graham united in marriage
Alpha NJ. Hassler of Augusta, Okla,
and Miss Lola Hoover of this city. Mr..
Hassler is prominent young business
man of Augusta and Miss Hoover 10
well and favorably known in this city.
Mr. and Mrs. Thomas S. Hutton have
removed from the Lee hotel TO 4lJ
North Harvey they now having rooms
at Ed Dunns.
George X. Williams, Of the firm Of
Williams & Goss, leaves tonight fof
New York and Boston.
Ten Yeau Ago.
Mr. and Mrs. Ed Overholser went ID
FL Reno this afternoon TO attend the
production of "The Squaw Man"
Mr. J. {. Dulaney. a prominent bust.
ness. man OF Perry, was in the city 10.
day
The Suffrage club is to meet this
evening at the office of Doctor Gay.
All who are interested are invited.
Assistant Bank Examiner Ed Sutton
returned today.,o Oklahoma City after
spending a week in Beaver county.
These London fogs that are envelop.
ing the city in the mornings are mighty
disagteeable but it clears up delights
fully by noon
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1917-01-15
One Year Ago Today In the War.

January Is, J9l6--Germany an.
not,nced reprisals against Britain for
Baralong incident. Russians renewed
desperate attacks in Galicia and Bess.
arabia.
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1917-01-15
Our Daily Special.

Names Is Names.
VIII +. SWEET lives at Essex, Mas
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1917-01-15
Giddapl

Some girls have TO use rouge But
those in Peoria. Ohio, can always 10.
cate A. Blush.
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1917-01-15
Things to Worry About.

lnihGe 10 worry ABOUT.
The nearest fixed star i' 100000,
600 miles distant
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1917-08-09

The following party climbed Mount
Hood Sunday: Paul and Hans Hoer-
lein, Miss Gretchen Hoerlein, Miss
Alice Gram, of Portland. Orvo Hukari,
Toivo Annala and Elmo Jakku. Be-
cause of the heavy thaw that has taken
place recently, the trip was declared
very dangerous one, and on one occa-
sion two members of the party slid
into creyasse.
1t is very rare that man ever wit
nesses or participates during his life
time in two such occasions as the fare
well given Sunday before last to
Twelfth Company. But John A. Will
son, civil war veteran and member of
Candy Post, G. A. R., has had his
emotions stirred twice on such events.
Mr.. Wilson, present for the Twelfth
Company farewell, over half century
leaving Wabash. Ind, where just such
crowd gave the departing soldiers
similar ovation.
Accompanied by W. E. Cooper,
Kansas City lumberman, W. H. Law
renee formerly in charge of local orch
ard inspection work and the man who
eradicated fire blight from the Hood
River valley, arrived Tuesday after
noon for visit here. Mr.. Lawrence is
now Prof. of Horticulture and chair
man of the horticultural division of
the Department of Agriculture at the
University of Missouri at Columbia.
Mr.. Cooper and Mr.. and Lawrence
went to the Husum section of Klicki-
tat county Tuesday afternoon to in
spect tract of oak timber owned
there by Mr.. Cooper.
Mr.. and Mrs. ]. W. Montee and their
son and daughter, Harold and Miss
Pauline, accompanied by their niece,
Miss Cleo White. of McMinnville, are
here visiting Mrs. Montee's sister.
Mrs. C. o. Huelat, and family. They
will motor later to Walla Walla and
Spokane, returning down the coast by
way of Seattle. The motor trip up
over the Siskiyous and thence up
through the Willamette valley and over
the Columbia River Highway is de-
clared by Mr.. Montee to be one of the
most pleasant he has ever taken, de.
spite several stretches of poor roads.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1917-08-09
Christian & Missionary Alliance

!, The Christian and Missionary Alli-
ance will hold short Sunday school at
$50 Sunday, then go to the M. E.
Church to hear Billy Sunday preach.
Young Peoples Society meet at Z
p. m, preaching at 8. Bible study
every Tuesday night. Prayer meeting
at 8 p. m, Thursday night closing
with testimony meeting Our June
monthly missionary offering was $s4,
the July offering 5000.
d. M. Carpenter, Pastor.