The Washington herald., 1917-01-21
Suffering Sufragettes.

"On tn level boss. what's them SUI
fragettes bivouackin' up in front OF tn
White House for7'
Why, Lon. they're tn grim reminders
OF tn Female Plea, an their Job is to
perch themselves on tn Presidents door
stoop SO that he an his gallant old "s4th"
can't never forget that they amt done
one ptcayune particle in tn way Of leg
islation to help give Fair Woman her
own right to yodel an every time Mr..
Wilson pokes his head out Of tn Red
Room window. to see II it's snowin'. he's
gonna be confronted by their big purple
an white banner, which has writ on 1t
in yallah them soul-stirrin' words, Then
you'll remember muh!'
Th' President had tn bunch into tea
not long ago, an told 'em then, that
while he was simply "ratty" about tn
suffrage movement himself, his party as
a whole didn't seem to fancy tn PROPOSE
tion-that Is in tn alltogether-but had no
particular objection to tn suggestion II
delivered by tn small package system,
like tn State by State way o. doin' It.
which wouldn't only give tn much-bet-
ter-half Of our population a fairer chanct
to get used to tn idea. but would learn
'em to appreciate what a over-rated game
they was runnin' up against. so that by
tn time all of our glorious old Forty
eight had come clean on tn Job they
be so all-hred disgusted with their bar
gain that they'd straightway ship it back
at tn expense OF tn shippers, but as
some of tn poor III suffragettes, bein' a
bit hard O. hearln', didn't quite get his
answer, they're gonna stick around til
he tells 'em ag'in.
well, I must say, boss. 1 can't hand
'em nothin' on tn idea! It's too spooky
an th' dead silence is enough L give a
regular guy tn "yips."
Is at so! An may ask where you got
on at? You can't hand 'em nothin'!
Why, you wretched weasel you can't
hand nobody nothin', Look at you'll You
dilapldated hookworm you amt nothin'
more'n a possession! Them trails" are
at least putin up a scrap, but whada
you do? I reiterate. whada you dor Why,
just here a few days ago tn United
States Senate picked you up bodily. slip
ped you through a wringer. shook you
out a couple O. times. an throwed you
over a clothes Hne { dry an va didn't
even say, "Ouch!'
You can't hand 'em nothin'l Va poor
"mackerel," o. course you can't hand 'em
nothin', cause everybody knows you
amt no kind OF handler! You're lust
a measley III taker, an don't va ever
let me hear you knockin' them Votes
for-Females folks ag'in! Hear me? Keep
still! Don't never answer back! Them
III girls nave got va peat SIX d1frerent
ways from tn Ace, an while 1 don't quite
get tn drift of this outside "watchful
waitin'," for tn Lord knows it's a tur-
rible tough game when you're settin' in
side, snusgled up to tn fire. gotta ad-
mire 'em for seein' tn bluff through.
"But, boss, Mr.. Wilson has certainly
showed that he was gentleman, cause
he asked 'em all in to warm Up their
Trilbys, an they wouldn't have none of
ft!'
Why, o. course, Mr.. Wilson invited 'em
in! I've told you one thousand times that
II any of 'em wanta slip over some po-
litical trick they've gotta hop out o. bed
early to get ahead OF tn President an
as he was dead wise that tn main object
of tn Picketers was to get one o. their
crew snitched, an then let her starve
he remembered Merrie England, engaged
new chef an recalled all his watch
men, thereby knockin' tn prop" out of
tn proposition, an putin th' stunt ON
tn fritz" DOPEY DAN.
Note-Lon says II a "frail' takes IL into
her top-piece that It is hern, va might
as well hand 1t over. an save all tn
bric-a-brac.