Forest City press. (Forest City, Potter County, D.T. [S.D.]) 1883-19??, 1917-03-09
HOT TALK.

zone of the gags of the professional
iunnNists and the ground and lofty
)okeslalths for the past forty years or
so has appertained to the man who in
1ulres ON a hot day, is ii hot enough
tor YOU" observed the man with the
protruding chin and the deep. hoarse
voice.
We'll. | want that gag Cancelled.
Scratched. written off, daubed out. cut
away. Topped and sent to the boneyard
along with the Observation-Disclosures
at-the-picnic joke. the young-felIow-
W"ho-slays-late screech and sew-a-but-
.on-on-my-shirt thing and ~ whole lot
pr other passe and decrepit ones that
ought to AVE been wiped away long
before Artemus Ward and Josh Billings
cashed in.
What the matter with the man
who asks if it is hot enough for you,
anyhow? What's wrong about his ques-
zion: Why shouldn't he ask III it's hot
enough for you" Why should he be n
target for all these gaggists who pick "A
little thing like that up and masticate
on it for a hundred years or so, till
everybody who reads Just the first line
knows the old thing by heart. no mat
tel. i'm What different kind of way it's
twisted:
III the day is hot. why shouldn't a
man say so?
"When the days cold we bleat about
it and discuss ii and comment on it and
onnpa thermometers and brag about
how cold IT is on our second-story porch
and max a whole peck of conversation
i'm general about it, don't we?
III we're staked to a big heap OF
snow we gnaw the blanket about that.
too, dom we. and tell each other how
t;~l, IL -: To-. III 80. ~r Nl~ o1..~1
and how our suburban car butted
through the tallest drift of all, and how
we had to shovel a path out the kitchen
way. and how we like to've lost our
lives trying to get home. and all that
sort of gay snow polixity, don't we,
hey?
III the rain comes down pretty steady
and powerful. We're there. with right
hefty stories. aren't we. about how we
couldn't see our hands before us for ii
out our way. and after while We drift
back to the times when the heavy rains
and melting snow in the mountains
made the foods during which skiffs
were seen or Pennsylvania avenue, and
We're OBSERVATION-DISCLOSURES
With all kinds and OF spiels on
the rain question. aren't we, L ask
again.
IF there's a nifty hail storm, we
prattle no end, don't we, about the size
of the hailstones in front Of our house,
and about what narrow escape our fox
terrier mutt had from being killed by
being hit by one OF them When he fool
iShly Scampered out into the yard to get
"A bone, and how the rattle of the stones
on the roof sounded like The volleying
of rifles-we're there, are We not. With
an endless chain of conversational junk
about that hail storm, are we not?
And when we're b%lanketed by all un-
usual fog. don't we get out on TO the
gabfest firing line. and stake each other
to more or less fanciful stories about
the thickness of it out in our vicinage.
and how one OF our young ones came
near getting lost trying TO get home
from the grocery. to which he'd been
sent to get a bar of soap through that
fog, and how when we struck Il match
it didn't light up a quartz of an inch
of adius and refused TO more than
sputter. a~nyway-we converse largely
| and expansively through out ~chapeaus
| about the big fog, don't we"
"Uh-huh. All right.
Then what's the matter with a man
asking II it's hot enough for you? Heat
is weather, isn't it? It's part of the
climatic game. ! suppose? Then why
| should it be barred i'm the betting? Why
! should the gaggists have been all these
~good-natured chap who. just as Il sort
| of greeting that comes natural to him.
asks you II it's hot enough for you?
You don't want him to say, when he
meets you on a sizzling day, that you're
wearing a bum hat. or that your feet
are not mates. or that your trousers
need pressing. or that he hears that you
were soused the limit last night. or that
he wishes your wife 'ud stop practicing
on the piano for the rest of the sum
mer-do you?
We'll. he doesn't do any of these
things. He just up and asks you. to be
civil and to pass the time OF day, ii It's
hot enough for you. n if you're not a
crouch and il you nave any thinking
power of your own and if you don't per
nit Yourself to be swayed and bullied
by these gaggists that I'm talking
about. you'll just make a reply as to
whether it's hot enough for you. like
YOU would reply to any other question,
and let it go at that.
IAN of the fellows that j know who
ask me if it's hot enough for me are
bully decent chaps, people that. i like.
and nothing at all like the asinfne pulp
nuts portrayed by the is-it-hot-enough-
for-you jokesmiths. They're all right.
I hope that they'll be asking that ques-
ticn as long as they live. and that al
fer they die theyll-er-well. no, don't
wish that. of ~course-but, say, on the
level now and all of this e~Xtraneous
matter aside, is it hot enough for
Perfectly Safe.
r.a-, tho Nau. Work WpoElv