The Washington times., 1917-07-14
Wartn.

.wnrtA.
Our attention was called yesterday
to a number of very fine warts by the
young gentleman of six years into
whose hands they had been given.
I'VE will tell you" We promised
him. 'how to change all your freckles
into warts also"
And for the sake Of other young
mentor, naturally. every boy be-
tween the ages OF six and ten wants
all the warts he can get-we publish
the method.
1t is very simple. At 1 o'clock IN
the morning you rub the lucky freckle
chosen for this promotion with a sill
yer ring, and as the clock is strik-
ing repeat three times the following
incantation:
Freclxle, freckle on my hand,
] rub you thrice with 4 silver band
Arise, Sir wsrt, all proud and grand!
Care must be taken that the charm
is repeated three times while the
clock is striking; otherwise not only
will the freckle fail to change into a
wart, but one OF the warts you already
have will change into q mere humble
freckle.
OF equal interest, perhaps, is the
method for wishing a wart onto an
other person.
You must catch this other person
while he or she Is in the act CT snCr-
ing. and puncture his or her skin at
the place where you wish the wart to
appear with a needle which has been
dipped in q drop OF blood from one Of
your own warts, saying this in:antar
ton:
As you lie there and snore and snort.
May one CT your snores turn into q
wartl
And, II you have always been a good
little boy, the snore will turn into a
wart Immediately. And no snore that
has ever turned into q wart can be
turned back into q snore again.
When we were q small boy we were
told that handling toads would give
US warts; but we must always have
got the wrong sort Of toad.
Nor did sucking the blood from q
friends warts do Us any good at all,
although we confidently expected 1t
would bring q rush OF warts to the
surface
Even the freekIe charm which we
have given Will not work unless q
boy has at least one wart already.
And there is no way to bring the irst
W1rt, that we know Of. except to be
patient and wait for #
You are either the sort of q boy
who IL worthy to have 4 wart, or you
are not; II It is your fortunate destiny
10 have one. nothing can keep It away
from you; II you do not deserve one,
nothing can give It to you.
After the hrst wart, however, Il de-
ponds ON yourself and your talents as
20 how many you can make 1t grow
into.
Having them licked BY dogs will
make them grow, once they are start
ed, but there Is nothing in lizards.
We gave lizards q pretty thorough
trial, at the age of seven. after toads
had failed; both live lizards and dead
lizards, and we state as the result OF
personal research and hrst-hand
knowledge that there Is nothing in
lizards
But after Q while our frst wart
came TO rs, because we were q good
little boy-And possibly because We
pIAgCu LOE II ulBuI ALlcI nlBnI-Anu
We have never had any thrill since to
equal IN intensity the thrill that came
20 rs when We realized that we were
to have q wart
Alas! for man-his giories and de-
lights are all transitory.
Even warts, in q few years, will
begin to seem q doubtful good.
Young men Of six and eight and ten
should make the most OF them while
they have them, and the conceit of
them. for their Iuster will fade.
Child Of six. You may not believe II
now, but IN ten years you will act
ually be seeking some way to get rid
of those warts. SO dearly cherished
and 80 painstal1ingly acquired. There
will come q time when you will think
Of them as q disadvantage, though
now you are so proud of them that
you would not trade them even for q
hsirlip or six toes on your feet.
Some girl in the high school will
look upon them with scorn, and you
will hate them, and II you can't get
ria Of them any other way. you will
bite them off.
About this time you will begin to
wash your ears and comb your hair
without being told; and this is the
beginning OF the end; "the shades of
the prison house" are gathering; you
are no longer a boy; you are degener-
ating into mere human being.
DON MARQUIS.