The Washington herald., 1917-09-20
M Good Morning, Judge"
Ktl Human Interest Stories of By
w Police Court Happenings. fPR4dfs PERKINS
Judge .
By
RUDOLPH
PERKINS

some words about a matter, and
John nourished a grudge ever since.
He took advantage of Joe's being
very much occupied with the four
legged KICKER that he thought II was
the best time In the world to get even.
John got himself in bad with Judge
Pugh by boasting of his well-planted
kick. II there is anything that ag-
gravates a judge 1t is 10 hear a man
boast Of a foul deed. he got ninety
days in Jail.
Wheels In His Head.
Clinton Thomas came up from
Leonardtown, Nd, to get a job as
messenger. He got the job, but
he had no bicycle. He told his
troubles to some other boys and was
advised to take the first bicycle he
saw, but TO see that no one wa.
looking. He did. Three weeks later
he was discovered. So was the BIZ
cycle. Clinton told the court that
some boys beat him up and made
him swipe the bicycle.
The court didn't seem to believe
him, so he tried another stunt. He
was willing to pay the owner of the
wheel for it. The court still hesitat-
ed about believing him, but the boy
who owned the wheel was satisfied
about It and agreed to sell it to Clin-
ton for IS. The court agreed, and
Clinton was paroled, but has to pay
enough for an old wheel to buy a new
one,
She'll Have Pesce Now.
"Jedge, All wants peace in nah
house, en- All will git it ef All has
ter fight fer IL, en- dis man was using
ondecent langwijSs that was awful
scanlous, en- when All tells him to
shet his trap. he says he will, en-
den, after he does il, he'll kill me-
Mamie Porter was complaining to
Judge Pugh about John Homes. lie
and his wife room at her house.
Wednesday afternoon, she told the
court, John was abusing his wife,
and Mrs. Porter asked him to refrain
from profanity. He came back at
her with murder in his eyes. He
hunted his razor and was going to
cut the throats of everybody, but the
police interfered.
When the cop disarmed him and
yanked him out into the street, he
shocked the neighborhood with his
language. Wifey said he was crazy.
She also mentioned the fact that she
was through with him, and that she
hated the sight of a razor. She said il
wouldn't be so bad II he cut himself,
but when he is soused she couldn't
tell just who was going to get cut.
Heretofore John has behaved him
self and the court fined him $40 and
released him on personal bonds. But
the court also pI omised that the next
time it will cost $500.
He is Protected Now.
ledge, All comes to work early in
the mawnin' en- All has ter hab some
fin to protect mahseff from robbers"
said John Thomas, trying to explain
why he was toting pistol and drunk
at the same time.
What have you got that someone
would want to steal?" asked Judge
Pugh. John couldn't tell and the
Whole upshot of it was that John liked
his gin too well.
He was arrested early Wednesday
morning on Seventh street where he
was getting in the way of the bread
man and the milk man. When he left
home that morning he took something
to warm him up. He remembered once
before when another man tried TO
rob him and he ran. This time he
was determined to shoot him full of
holes. The ourt, knowing what a
bum" shot John Is, especially when
he is shot up with booze, had to take
some precautions to keep him from
shooting cop. SO he fined him sec
or three months.
Always a Woman I'm 1t.
George Matthews works in the Elmer
gency Hospital. or rather he did, He
is not a doctor, but a mop artist. He
is always ready for anything that hap
pens. That's his business. At / O'Clock
Wednesday morning George and his
girl were out walking. Along walked
Alfred Smith. He trod on the lady's
corns. 1t hurt. She called him back
and demanded an apology. She got
1t and she smiled at him. He saw
her in the dark. He smiled back. Her
beau saw her.
George was ready for this emer.
gency. He had a gun. He poked 1t In
Alfred's ribs. Another man coming
up on the same side OF the street saw
the gun and jumped over an eight-foo,
fence. A cop heard about the CUR
play. Alfred had escaped and hollered
The gun was found. so was George
he said he didn't have any but he
couldn't make Judge Pugh believe II
and he went down for l2o days.