The Butler weekly times., 1917-07-19

ASI-.lNS nj. =.
time and no hot water or suppe
time and nothin' to eat. Howeve
there's nothing so bad but that
might be 'wusser' (that is excep
mel. You see live good deal il
the past. | like to revert IN mem
ory to the callow days of, my you'll
when ] was breakin into 'sassiety'-
and wooing a maidea lair (also' TO
fair. ] had found the gal wanted
took her to a party and as everything
seemed propitious Ufe sky being il
its proper place, etc.) decided tt
tell her the old old, yet never new
story. l thought her m'ne ior th'
asking. But she wasn't. No, in
deedy, for when the day was over ane
ended all the play, she heard me
through, then turned her back ant
said Boy! and walked away. lyt
travelled round the world since ther
and wooed the muses. coy. I've
earned a living by my pen ard beer
of fame toy. But never in my
brightest dreams nor in my keenes'
joy could l forget the female spite
with which she called me Coy!
There's no use of talkin'. I'm agoin
to quit this walkin'. I'm goin' to fly
an air plane way up high. How the
Angels all will giggle when ] do that
awful wiggle, when I do the Hooch'e
Kootchie in the sky.
I am willing to give up Qor the
allies) clothes, food, money, tea, cot
fee, lwhiskey, tobacco, my tin Lizzie
all my poor relations, Chinese rugs,
ingrowing toe nails, corns, bunions,
blisters-Fact is, I'm willing to give
up all of the neccssaries except
Life. And yet, when fellow has Civ
en- up all these, what is there left to
live for? Guess I'll let the tail go
with the hide and give my life too.
/ never did believe in half doing any
thing
A very prominent paper wants to
know What Heaven is. lis very
evident the editor knows what He'll
is. That is, if he has been long in
the newspaper biz. My idea cf what
Heaven is, is contented family, a
home where sunshine and happiness
abide and where mother is. That is
what Heaven is to me and also where
it is.
notice that the death rate of in
fants in Germany is on the decrease.
Also that England's death rate is on
the increase, due to the fact that
Germans are very proficient in drop
ping bombs on the school houses.
Mexico has declared war on the
kraut eaters. Much more to the point
Mexico will borrow the coin of the
realm with which to carry on sald
war from your Uncle Sammy, and
yet, if / mistake not land ] think |
do) Mexico didn't salute the flag
either. Not so you could notice it,,
eh?
A fellow came to me 'onct' and
said, I'm Owen Moore We'll"
says I, why in the name OF Heinz's
81 varieties don't you 60 ard pay
him? The very fact that your Oweh
Moore indicates that you are in debt
to him. Go my friend and pay ali
that thou owest." He gapcd at me
This eyes and mouth were ike those
Il fish, and said, For the love OF
the Allies, man. what is ail;n' you.
Wait, man, and listen. It's like this
I'm Owen Moore who went away,
owing more than he could pay.
Owen Moore came back today owe
ing more When they haG sue
ceeded in bringing me back from
deamland he was gone and as have
never seen him since very strongly
suspect that he is still Owen Moore.
Get up and hustle, that's my style.
Be doin' somethin' all the while.
A bright. sunny face wins many a
smile, by jing. The lark is up 10
meet the sun and dew. VIVA: tine
birds have done you 'sho kindo'.
Don't let the birds be happier n you.
Just sing.
A man who makes no mistakes new
er accomplishes anything nor gets
anywhere, while the fellow who
makes a mistake gets his pay check,
also an invitation to come back no
more. So what's the use. just this
let a man examine himself and study
to be approved.
write for the Butler Weekly, l
like the work quite well. If there's
. person on earth who don't like my
style they can take little trip to-
Germany.
Too busy this week for writin'. Ex-
cuse . short letter.
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