The Washington herald., 1917-11-15
GOOD 1
MORNING
JUDGE
.u.ss.~ -.
pessuss

lES i.
This Italian Was Prepared.
A long time ago Vincent Caster.'
clio, switchman at Ninth and
streets northwest, was set upon oy
thugs. robbed and shot In the hand.
He never forgot IL. Since that
time he has been saving his money
and keeping 1t slowed away In his
pocket.
For fear he would be robbed again,
Vincent carried a revolver. II was
found on him the other day by Po-
liceman Helmuth.
The court reminded Vincent that
he was working within twenty feet
of a bank and about forty feet from
a liberty bond sign. So there was
no real excuse for carrying 50 much
money.
He was fined $50 and the sentence
was suspended.
N Time for Time. n
Andrew Stevenson was out of work.
And also out of money.
And not having any money he was
getting hungry. So he went visit
ing. He called on Sarah Stoops.
Sarah didn't care much for An
drew and she went out and left
him sittink In the house. She didn't
see the glue on his fingers. q.
When she came back she missed
her watch and chain. She thought
of Andrew She reprimanded her
self for leaving him alone In the
house.
Andrew was nabbed. The watch
was recovered. 1t had been sold fot
a few dollars.
They gave him something to eat
i'm the station house and he con-
fessed. He was not aware of the
great labor shortage.
The court reminded him that he
could have obtained a job in five
minutes il he had looked. But no.
Andrew tried the easiest way"
+. And for sixty days Andrew will
work for the government for moth
ing.
She Sure Knew About IL.
"Jedge. eff All hit nah wife All doan
know nothin' bout it,
Yes. but she knows all about II,
said the court to Chester Smith. "and
it shows plainly on her face just how
hard you hit her.
Carrie Smith looked as though she
had been hit by a steamroller. She
couldn't see out of one eye
Chester woke her up the other night
at midnight and began a fuss. She
refused to talk, saying that she was
sleepy.
She awoke the whole neighborhood
with her screams. The cops ran in
and prevented Chester from doing
further damage.
And his excuse was that il he hit
his wife, he did il in his sleep And
IL this be so. what would he have
done IL he had been awake and need
ed a little exercise7
1t all happened Carrie said. about
the money for the wash. Chester had
given her 90 cents TO pay the wash
woman and she washed the clothes
and kept the money.
Chester couldn't see where she had
earned it and punished her. The court
punished him with sixty days.
Spies Were at Work.
For two whole months Albert Briggs
had been visiting his girl. Edna
Sewell. Edna's pa didn't know a
thing about it. He had forbidden her
to even look cross-eyed at Albert.
So it became necessary for Albert to
apply the art of camoufiage. Like
wise Edna.
She made a dummy OF herself in
the bed. snsaked out and met Albert.
who was wearing a false moustache,
at the corner. From there they went
to a friends house
Some treacherous person put old man
Sewell wise to this little game. He
flew around to the trysting place with
a club.
He hit at Albert and struck Edna.
knocking three teeth out. Albert made
him take the count in short order. An
old man can't fight light the young
ones can.
And so pa had Albert arrested. Edna
was a witness for her beau. Pa was
mortified, as he expected that his
daughter would stick up for him. But
she was hurt, too.
The court let Albert so, as he had
acted in self-defense.
Those Boys.
Monday evening Eliza Brush was
waking DOWN r OuTln street singing 10
herself. All OF a sudden it got dark
and her head began to buzz.
Little Rufus Morton had thrown a
piece of bfck and shivered it on
Eliza's head. He wasn't throwing at
her. He was just practicing.
When Eliza recovered, she grabbed
Rufus and led him to his mother and
demanded that he be spanked. oh, no,
Rufus's mother wouldn't spank her
darling boy. Indeed she wouldn't
And so Eliza spanked him herself.
She did a very good job. Ever since
young Rufus has been eating his meals
standing up.
His mother got very angry at Eliza.
Never before had Rufus been spanked.
Eliza made up for lost time.
Mrs. Morton got dressed hurriedly
and got a warrant. Eliza was locked
up. She had no money for collateral
And the court told her she had no
right to spank other peoples chill
iran fine fi~aI