Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1917-08-02
Should Never Be Broken Un-
less For Urgent
Reason
BY BEATRICE FAIRFAX

ry 10 go to the theater in your place
and give up regretfully your last
opportunity to see the clever and
amusing play at the Lyceum which
is TO be Withdrawn after that even
ing's performance. But Virginia
needs YOU; you cannot fail her.
AT slX-thirty-Just as you are set
ting off to meet Virginia, the phone
rings again. Virginia's voice greets
you.
"Oh, my dea&, I'm so glad l got
you-l didn't Want you to start off
on wild goose chase. Jack Lacey
just called me up and asked me to
see that clever new play which is
closing tonight and l knew you
wouldn't want me to miss it."
You gasp. Virginia is going with
Jack Lacey to the very play which
you gave up, because she needed
! you!
Do you protest? Then Virginia
tearfully asks you how you can be
so unkind. She is lonely and blue
and she telephoned you because she
place; but seeing that clever play at
the Lyceum will be even better for
her. OF course, If you insist on
holding her to the engagement-but
she wouldn't treat you that way.
Do you accept Virginia's ruthless
breaking of the engagement with
YOU in favor of one with Jack Lacey ?
You encourage her in her cavalier
attitude toward her engagements
with women when opportunities to
go out with men come along. You
let Virginia feel that she is priv
ileged to make and break engage
ments at will-to pick and choose
and please herself rather than to
abide by any schedule which has
been made and which includes her.
Your very willingness to break an
engagement for her encouraged Vir-
ginia in her casual attitude toward
keeping appointments.
The Attitude of Women
. A cavalier attitude toward en-
gagements isl fear me-more
characteristic of women than of
men. Even rather fine women have
feeling that they have right to
pick out the invitations which most
appeals to them and to cancel any
other which interferes with it.
a group of us were discussing
young dramatist recently and we
all agreed that one of the reasons
we liked Henrietta so much was be-
cause she was completely depend
able. One of the girls summed it up
like this: IF she promised to meet
me at tea room for lunch and the
Duke of Argyle came along and in
vited her to feast at his castle,
shed keep her date with me. She's
wonder. l never knew a girl so
decent to others-even when there
are men at stake. But I don't know
another girl just like Henrietta"
There are not very many! 1 can
find excuses a-plenty for this fail
ing-but l wish it were not there to
be excused.
Men generally object to making
engagements far ahead. They say
very frankly, when evening comes
along, l may not feel one bit like
going ice-skating. 1 may want to
stay and feed logs to the CRATE fire.
| hate to tie myself up so far ahead.
Let me call you up some evening
when I'm just in the mood and
well motor out to one of those cute
little places in Westchester and
have dinner and a few Dances
And you say to yourself: How
selfish men are. They're terribly
spoiled. They always want to do
what they enjoy!"
Perhaps they are selfish eve
won't discuss that here and now and
to- day.. But much can be forgiven
men for the sake of their honesty.
About engagements men have a
stronger sense of obligation than
women. They may object to making
them but once they have committed
themselves to a social course, moth
ing but the Great God Business can
interfere.
Men More Particular
Perhaps it is because woman have
generally to make the best of what
is offered them-because they are
not free to choose their pleasures
and enjoyments and are dependent
to certain extent on others to Of
fer them their social opportunities,
that they do not feel bound down
by the lesser pleasures when the
greater ones are offered.
But there is no worse form of
selfishness generally prevalent
among women than their tendency
to slip out of one engagement and
into another, regardless of who is
being hurt and disappointed and
thoroughly disconnected by their
detection. A sensitive girl is likely
to feel real suffering as a result of
the treatment which another girl
meets out to her when she serenely
neglects to keep an engagement and
calmly leaves her friend high and
dry.
Suppose you have planned to
spend the Fourth of July on coun-
try hike" with another girl, and
then some man invites you to take
the day trip up the Hudson or to go
to Coney Island? Before you ac-
cept, stop to consider what you are
doing to the girl who is counting
or you to be her companion for the
holiday.
Are you leaving her marooned on
an island of utter inaction. with
seas of loneliness all around her ?
Can she get another companion If
you desert her at the last minute Z?
Or must she go through a long,
lonely, stupid day with nothing to
relieve it's monotony, and a little
ache in her heart because her friend
has treated her so badly?
Recently two girl friends of mine
had a rather amusing experience,
out of which they brought renewed
respect and liking for each other.
Irene had invited Lillian to a little
dinner party of four on Saturday
evening. On Friday evening Lillian
was invited to spend a week end
with a group Of brilliant and charm
ing people at a fascinating country
house. Three days in the country,
or one dinner party to which she
was pledged She asked for a few
hours to think it over and finally
dacided IN mt the situation to Trana