The Birmingham age-herald., 1917-01-10
LUKE M,LUKE SAYS

The style journals inform us that Spats will be fashionable next spring. They will also be fashionable In married circles all winter and all summer. Another reason why it is foolish to de-
 bate with your wife is because she doesn't know anything about either parliament tary law or Marquis of Queensberry rules.
 | Why should the President worry over | the European situation when every sa- loon contains a half dozen experts on International law who know how to settle
 the matter?
 1 A man will laugh at the way the fool women adorn themselves, Then he will
 join the uniform rank of a lodge and
 wear feathers and a tin sword. l Ever notice that the distinguished men who get their pictures in the papers by being cured of what ailed them through
 one bottle of Pruneboozia are so distin- guished that you never even heard of
 them before?
 | The old-fashioned girl who used to be afraid of COW now has a daughter who
 just loves to throw the bull l Judging by the divorce records, 1t would
 seem as if rich men made poor hus-
 bands.
 | Once in a while you will find man who
 isn't sincere about 1t when he worships
 his creator. But it is different with a self-made man.
 ] The most futile thing in the world is to hold up the plumber who is soldering on l the job on your premises and berate him
 for killing time. He is merely going to charge you for the time you occupy in
 cussing him.
 They call it ''incompatibility." But 1t l is the dog in the manager that sneaks into
 court at the heels of the couple who seek
 the divorce.
 ] Why do widows get all the sympathy? As rule wives need sympathy more than do widows.
 A bride of two days imagines that her wedding day will go down into history
 with the date of the discovery of America and other great events.
 There are some things that a man cant llearn to do successfully after taking a few lessons. But loafing isn't one oi them.
 l After friend wife sees something excit. ling down town and explains 1t to friend husband. friend husband has to spend ar lhour making her explain her explanation A feller tries to tell us that all Mexi leans are bad. We don't believe it. There Imust be several thousand good Mexicans because Villa and Carranza have killed
 lat least that many. The only time a man doesn't judge bS Appearances Is when they happen to b' against him.
 Keep your trouble to yourself and son' of these days you will run into fellow who Is looking for 1t. It is a good thing for George Washing lton that he isn't living today. If he were some of our eminent refor1ners would hir gum-shoe artists to trail him and pu dictographs in his house so they coul' catch him telling. lie and expose hi wickedness to the world. A man who has a case of rheumatisn lin good working order can't understant why the government wastes money Il maintaining . weather bureau. !, What is the use of mother trying t' , brighten the home Father will onl, roar about tho gas bill.
 Before he gets her he thinks that sh : lis an angel. And after he gets her sh often turns out to be high flyer. The fellow who likes to quote the adag lthat the race is not always to the swif , Iusually turns out to be an also ran.
 Another pest we all love is the lad wh
 buttonholes us on the street when W are busy and wants to know what V : think about the war In Europe.