Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1916-07-22

| It used to cost him a fortune for moth balls
| alone and when he took of a pair OF pants
| he sent II round to the tailor and had a v
| put in the back against the time when he
| was going to wear em again. However
Birsky, he soon got tired of admiration, and
II didn't make no difference that his wife
| tried TO get him to take fresh interest by
| saying Turn round and let me see the
back. 1 think that pepln effect of the
| S42d Regiment pe-Schaumburg National
Guard which you have on is awful becom.
| ing to you, Pepper. Why don't you wear II
again soon--say, year from next July
4th7 yunderstand II didn't do no good,
and he quick passed into the second or
speech-making stage of his trouble"
"Speech.making always seems to be
symptom that feler's got an ism the mat
ter with him" Brsky commented al
though It's usually the first stage of the
trouble"
"The FIRST and only stage in some cases,
like old Mr.. Bryan, oidv hasholom," Zapp
said, "dber with the Kaiser, he seems to
have got past that part Of his ism. There
was time here about three years ago when
you couldn't pick up a paper without read.
ing how the Kaiser addressed the South
Prusslan, Wurtemburg and Rhein-Pfalz
Commercial Travellers Association or some
such organization about the nailed first oder
the three KS or something, but nowadays
the poor feller don't open his mouth at all"
why should he?" Brsky asked. "If
every politician NIT an ism would have his
ism tried out on him the way the Kaiser
has Zapp even fellers init socialism would
keep quiet. Take that speech which the
Kaiser used to get off "a few years ago about
women should attend to the three KS
Rirche kucche uHd Ktnder-and leave all
other Jobs TO the Inen folks, and he had a
pretty good nerve 70 pull II even In them
days, when thousands of German women
was not only attending to the church, the
cooking and the children. but was also at
tending TO the Goa! mining the farming and
the street sweeping not to mention n few
hundred other Jobs which In America we
consider such hard work for a native.born
citizen Zapp that we hand 'em over to big
greennorns from Hungary and Poland.
Aber today yet 'cireb over In Germany
women Is running .hc street cars, the elec.
tria light plants and loing- the heavier work
that the old felers " So and 90 Amt up to
exactly N .he rolling mills and foundries,
Zapp. II n loyal German subject has to write
a letter to the Emperor and finds himself
using word beginning NIT a X, y'under.
stand, he tries to think of a substitute word
beginning with or w, so as not to
embarrass the poor Nebtch."
HE should ought to be embarra ssed,"
Zapp said. "a feller which Is working the
way the Kaiser worked to get every man
from 16 to so to become n soldier. Birsky
should ought to figure In advance what is
going to happen to other businesses besides
the soldier business in case his scheme turns
out 100 per cent successful Also, BirsSy
II all the mop from 16 to 60 is fighting us
soldiers and all the women Is busy NIT
churches cooking and children, Brsky, who
did he expect Is going to run the street cars
and the electric light plants anyway"
Listen, Zapp, feller init an ism is the
last one to expect his scheme is going to
turn out 100 per cent successful" Blrsty
said "In fact, Zapp, I give the Kaiser
credit that when the war happened and he
begun to realize what he said and did In
the way of miltarism to bring It about,
y'understand, his feelings toward the whole
thing was: For the love of Mars, couldn't
you take a joke? Yes, Zapp, all them ism
fellers is the same way. When they talk |