El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1916-04-06


M dered pair Of white stockings
= - on account Of the war in Eu-
rope.
Raj Barlow is thinking Of joining
the army. He would make a good
soldier, having already mad consider
able experience in shouting at people.
Fit Smith who got mad and left home
forever few days ago, bought a
rniddIing of meat yesterday and will
start married life all over again
The clerk in the dry goods store at
Tickville has taken his spring and
summer stand in the front door, where
he will be pleased to meet his many
friends and customers, while he plays
with the awning rope and stops the
girls that pass by there for no other
reason.
Sidney Hooks, who swore off from
all his meanness the first Of the year,
has got so far behind with his smok-
ing and cussing that II will take MIN
several months TO catch up.
Our blacksmith, who Is none other
than Dock Hooks, says It's easy for
preacher to keep his religion, having
nothing else TO do, but that IL he had
to shoe mules IN fly time, he would
have to swap places with the congre-
cation every week.
Cricket Hicks says It looks like
everything is arranged about right.
For instance the ontOn-eattng season
comes at the same time Of year that
the people begin to raise their win
dows.
Clab Hancock. who has been raising
a corn crop on Muskrat Ridge every
year, will plant It this time in the
Gimlet creek bottoms. where he won't
be bothered with so many suggestions
from people who have been reading
farm papers.
The blind man reports business I'm
proving in his line, and is figuring on
getting another tune for his hand or
gan, and charging his tin cup.
Miss Hostetter Hooks, who has done
nearly everything else in the category
to attract attention, has now cut OF
the bottom OF her skirt
Sim Flinders is having his. chair
hottomeds as he gets tired sitting on
the fence all the time.
Atlas Addresses School.
Atlas Peck, who ranks next 10 the
Wild Onion school teacher in the way
of brains, made a talk before the
scholars at the Wild Onion school
house Friday evening and dwelt at
length on the possibilities Of the imagi-
nation, which when anaylzed, means
that when person let's his magma
ton run away with him he leaves the
straight and narrow road Of truth and
jumps the fence into the field of doubt.
During the course Of his well chosen
remarks, Atlas stated that his great
grandfather used to tell Of a man who
was several hundred times larger than
anybody else, and was just as strong
as he was large. There was no house
big enough for him, so he slept in a
large cave-and then his feet stuck out
and got cold. He said this man had a
very bad temper at times and when he
ate four or five steers for supper and
they didn't agree with him during
the night, he would get up next morn
ing out Of sorts, and would go out
and pull up several trees by the roots.
or upset pond or two, and grab mules
by the tail and slam them against the
ground. But, on the other hand. when
he was feeling good he was in fine
numor and sometimes would laugh so
loud all the neighbors thought is was
an earthquake. Now, according to
Atlas, this man was a great hand to
90 anything in his power for his
friends, and it so happened one day
that there was an open air meeting
OF the citizens TO take up the project
OF Strengthening very crooked creek;