The Johnson City comet. (Johnson City, Tenn.) 1916-1917, 1916-03-16
SQUAD ROOM STORIES.


night, thrift was not fashionable
with soldiers during and after the
war: in fact we continued in a state
of impecuniosity, occasionally having
the coin of the realm, but blew it in
for Injuries, refnements, ornaments
and the accessories of the society we
circled in. Now, we members arc
the only men not producing wealth,
who can save" having life income
out of which to do it. The habit Of
thrift is not formed in a day and for
some of us it TOOK years to go to that
extreme. But many now in the Home
have cultivated tie homely virtue of
frugality. OF course the miser is
not a fiction of the past and when he
drifts away into space the post fund
first gets his PLEAS rule. When
] tell you that there are members of
this Home, many of them, whose
check would be honored for thous-
ands of dollars, you think I'm Jug
Cling the truth; not at all. Why, sir,
right in one barrack here are three
or four vets who pay taxes on Sl0,
900 ana upwards. AT least 500 mem
bars have deposits in the banks, with
the treasurer, and elsewhere, in
amounts from 500 to $5,000-and
real estate besides. It's an exploded
idea that we are all poor in worldly
goods-and spendthrifts. Not on your
life! There are some who believe
in one country, one flag and one wife
all the time and from the low cost
of high living, ETC., cannot save, OF
don't want to- Well. there's no peck
ct in a shroud.'
An element of the membership are
busy this week sending orders 10
mail houses for all manner of things.
In a few days a search of lockers
would reveal an invoice from junk
jewelry to bowie knives, viz; Hair
dye, syringes, rubber stockings, vital
ity pills, douches, wildcat bonds, con-
sumption "cures," electric batteries,
massage paste, bogus land warrants,
matrimonial papers, soaps for
scratchers, abdominal belts, drug-hab-
it cures, corn parers, bunion plas-
tiers, Ingersoll watches, rheumatism
rings, nose paint, hair growers, pat
ent nostrums, pile remedies, braces,
love powders" and so on. Still
you wonder why bunch now and
then are shipped to the BOBBY house
at Washington City,
We may be living in FOOLS par
adise and through the valor of ig-
norance escape turmoil and trouble,
but extra duty men seem to get
Jared once in while. Read the
following epistolary message re-
ceived here the other day
Armordale, N. c., March Is.
Joshua Gray, Soldiers Home, Ten
nessee:
You're a helofa Teller to swap ami
mails with. | made contract with
you to send the Home a male deer
for a doe elk to mate in my herd.
You got the buck and l got gem
tleman elk with whiskers. Unless
you make good and pay the freight
there'll be nothing left of you but
your immortal soul. Yours truly,
HEZIKIAH SIMS.
The QUESTIONABLE now comes into
our life; he fills the squadroom with
misery and strife; he hunts oldtime
veterans in bed and at the mess and
finally will get their goat before st.
Patrick's day, l guess. All vets who
do not want to drink and many more
young crank with a heavy billiard
cue The QUESTIONABLE to rankle us
will grab our arm and say, Where
were you when the war broke out
and where are you today? Do you
prefer to play high five or eat T.
bone steak? Were you ever shot, OF
married, and what treatment did you
take?" A thousand questions he will
ask and his name is censored here,
but the only way to stop him, is to
strange the mountaineer.
In the dim past, among the Arapa-
hoe Indians, there was a simple pro-
vision for divorcing without going
through a heap of fuss and feathers.
All the liege lord had to do was to
tell his squaw to go, but this had to
be done three times sleep apart |
so that the heat OF passion could not
be charged against his judgment in
the matter. If the woman desired |
TO quit her old man, the burden of Dir
vorce fell upon her in a little more
difficult manner. She had to give
notice on three different days, and it
was up to her to make good with her
skiddoo. Usually she had to make a
run for it. and if she could reach her
fathers lodge before her angry hus-
band could shoot her. all well and |