davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1916-10-07
Romance and Prose In Every
" day Life X
By DOROTHY DIX.

~ ID you ever notice that when you
give a woman any kind of a ro-
- mantle. high falutin' theory as q
solution Of a problem. she will swallow
It, hook bait and sinker, without ever
Investigating whether it will work or
not, but II you offer her a practical,
Guilty. she repudiates both the counsel
and the counselor?
Take, for instance. the question that
looms biggest on the horizon Of every
married woman. that of keeping her
husband happy and satisfied at home
and thinking that he won the capital
prize in the domestic lottery ina wife.
Every wife spends hours bordering
over that dark and inscruitable prob
lem. and she falls for such silly twaddle
as that the way to retain husbands
love is b. keeping young and beautiful,
which can't be done, or by keeping him
fascinated by coquetting with him. and
keeping him guessing, which would
make any husband exceedingly tired. or
by talking politics and the stock
market to him, which would bore him
to death, but she will not listen to you
when you tell her that the surest way
OF graphing a husband to her is to
make him comfortable.
Women hate and loathe and despise
the practical side OF life. and that is
the reason that they are so reluctant to
accept the fact-which is a fact-that
while mans love may be inspired by
his fancy. his affection is dependent
upon his physical well being.
Those PrOsaie Details.
IF a wife could secure her husbands
health and prosperity and happiness by
being torn to pieces by red-hot pincers.
or enduring any other incredible suffer-
ing and martyrdOm, she would gladly
do IL. But when il comes to the pro-
butchers bills. and personally seeing
that he is provided with two good.
square meals a day. she is seldom will
ing TO pay the price.
1t disgusts her that love should be
built upon such 4 material foundation.
and yet the God who made the first
man, and who gave him four times as
much stomach as he did heart, built
him that way.
Women might take a tip from that.
and also from the utterance of the most
married man that ever ived-SOlomOn
"a man. with a thousand wives. and
fifty-seven varieties of wifely devotion,
and who got so tired of it all that he
cried out in desperation
stay me with flagOns. comfort me
with apples; for l am sick Of love"
Concerning the Importance of under
writing domestic affection with good
housekeeping. there are three points
that no woman can afford to ignore.
The first is that men love TO eat and
eat to love No man ever proposed to
a woman on an N~Tpty stomach, nor
does any husband pay his wife a COM
pliment, or give her a fat check in the
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1916-10-07
BY
Rene Bache

extended. and the quaking captive Is
dragged into safety
Puzzled Is Solved.
The puzzle Of the monsters lOcomo-
tion is solved when one understands
that il crawls along on two endless
belts os shortsections of rail. Jointed.
and which operate over cogged
mechanism that lays the sections down
as the tractor moves ahead. and PICKS
them up again behind. so that Gas
one might saw the car runs con-
tinuously on self-laid track The
body of the car is supported by wheeled
trucks somewhat like small railroad
trucks. The wheels. however, never
touch the ground, but run on the rail-
Imagine a Vehicle that runs on two
such endless belts lin lieu Of wheels.
each of them being the full length OF
the car. Unlike wheels. the belts being
composed of short sections) are able
to adapt themselves to any configura-
ton OF ground they may pass over.
Owing to the length Of the belts. the
car is able to straddle q trench; or
II may in its progress waddle in ana
out Of mine-craters and other major
Irregularities of the terrain.
of such a character. with armor
added and an armament of machine
guns. is the new military engine en-
ployed by the British forces on the
Somme front II is manifestly form
liable mechanism Of war and pre-
sumabIy il is destined in the future
to play an important part in military
opera tfons-nOt only IN the present
conflict but in some international
chickering's where we ourselves VIII De
obliged to participate
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1916-10-07

Hon. Mrs told Hon. Mr. how she have
decided TO go Mrs Nubbins's pinkish
ball.
How you get sufficiently peach color
gownd2' he ask out
I make one by attaching Russian
skating costume TO silkish kimono
wrapper" she devote. while deranging
hair. Pretty soonly they disappear
away to bedroom for wress-up. At
lastly observe Hon Mrs approach out,
looking very empress, while followed
BY Hon Mr. who walk with hurt-shoe-
expression They depart off.
With immediate quiclness I plunge
into bedroom where Hon Trusoe was
hanged Elevating my fingers like
crabs, I snatch my embrace full Of
miscellaneous garmints - beauty OF
cloak, suit, linger-wear, shoe and other
hats Shamefully I gather him to bun
die, then I clumb out from window. be-
cause this were best burglar way.
With galloping toes I approach to sun
OF Mikado Social Hall Great ilumnina-
ton was in it. Already I could see
Miss Alice Furiakoi appearing calm but
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1916-10-07

Your nice-color clothing went forever.
Therefore go too
Why you SOg" require Mrs & Mr. to-
gether like GLORIOUS girls
Because to-" I amputate- you thu.A
me be keeper for that dresses. You
lose I 10 blame Great curses shall
befau me-"
-Ah no, 10000 times notT' she mar
rate with sweet holla- That trusoe
were insured for 2OO0s- Tomorrow I
shall collect that burglary money and
obtain something can wear
20 joyous yan Hon Mr. with COL
lege voice Togo you are public bene-
factory like Carnegie library
You are treasury among servants"
renig she, making dove eyes. Here
after you may have three Thursdays a
week instead Of two"
While thanking her I stand there
feeling puzzled. like angel in sleeps
clothing.
Hoping you are the same,
Yours truly,
Hashimura Togo.
Copyright by Good Housekeeping
Magazine)
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1916-10-07

! takes a firm stand on all public aues-
tons. has come out in an editorial
as being opposed TO IT, He SAYS IL
Tickville had another paper the people
would get too far behind. with their
work trying to help run it
lobe Moseley went down the road
this morning gathering up his family
that got scattered in a runaway yes
terday-
Little Fidity Flinders got strangled
on a chicken feather he accidentally
swallowed Tuesday. and the horse doc
tor had to be called The doctor put
him on a heavier diet
Miss Fruzie Allsop rode as far "A
Rye Straw with the mail carrier on
Tuesday morning. She went as sec
ond class matter.
The Hog Ford preacher has decided
to begin a prOtracted meeting as soon
as the weather gets cold He believes
II good plan TO do this while every
body has their hands in their pockets.
Fletcher Henstep was tried at
Bounding BillOws Saturday morning
on a charge of stealing a ten dollar
COW from some one over near Thur
deration- He pleaded guilty with the
understanding that the court would
pay him three dollars to boot between
the COW and the fine.
Ellick Hellwanger has a new vest
with big strips and cross bars on It
Raj Barlow says all Ellick lacks now
Of being in Jail is having paddock for
a watch charm.
pen for sale cheap. 1t would make
good front yard and Luke may move
his house up behind it
The HOgWalloW Improvement as
ISOLATION is preparing to so into win
ter quarters. -
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1916-10-07
This Black Velour Hat Is Effectively
Trimmed With a Rose Colored Plume.

type Of hat that one can predict as
the popular model The canotiers.
which are much liked in America. are
not shown now at all The clock
shapes. too. have entirely disappeared.
In fact, most Of the dropping designs
have been replaced by those of di
rectly opposite lines. One house. for
example. is showing shapes with the
large brims turned away from the face
in every conceivable form. The beret
hat, which is shown everywhere and
which is already being so extensively
worn, is sure to endure for early au-
tumn- In all the houses that I have
seen so far there is a marked tendency
toward high effects.
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1916-10-07

awful half-hour wait when dinner Is
late 1t is when he is full and COM
Portable that the gastric juices play
upon mans heart and soften IL to-
ward woman.
Where Digestion Comes In
The second point is that, unromantic
as II sounds. affection depends upon di-
gestion, and when dyspepsia comes in
at the door, loves flies out Of the win
dow Also peace. Likewise harmony
and these are followed by cheerfulness,
amlab1lity and all the other lovable
qualities in husband.
NO man whose outraged stomach Is
wrestling with sour bread, tough steak
half cooked vegetables and soEgy pie
Is m state OF mind to do anything but
swear at his wife. spank the baby, and
kick the cat. so every wife faces the
proposition that if she wants to keen
her husband her lover. she has got to
look after his liver and keep him so
ignorant OF his stomach that he will
have time to remember his heart.
The third point is that the prosperity
OF a family depends upon the Wornan's
skill as housekeeper- Napoleon said
that an army fought on its stomach
ana the same thing is true Of every in
dlVldual man who is engaged in the
battle for fortune. The amount Of work
ana the quality OF his work are in df-
rect ratio 10 his energy and vital force.
and this depends upon how Comfortable
and peaceful things are at home
Between the achievements of the man
VINO goes forth 10 his daily work rested
refreshed and properly nourished. and
me one VINO goes forth harassed and
1llled with indigestible food is the ar
ference between success and failure
Hence, II pays every wife to learn how
10 COOK and keep house because If in
creases her husbands earning capacit,-
FINALLY, the home is a wife's weapon.
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1916-10-07

lady mother-in-legal characteristic.
was there empacking Mrs. Bliss lady
clothing into enlarged trunk
90 not to do" I report with war
cry
why shouldn't she nara.e with
words OF eros eagles.
Because those clothing belong to
elsewheres, I otter distinctually.
They belong 10 Miss FuriaOki, Miss
Furiaoh belong TO my son. my son be-
long to me-" she narrate- Therefore"
She say that like juries eondemning
snakes.
OH I snorl. Ny Cousin Nogi shall
come here TO suppress such thieVery-'
I rosh forth TO society room and make
peal-yan for that close relationship to
me NOgi was nowhere I 20 back
Mrs Elderly Katsu." stubborn.
Remove out them clothings before vio-
lence."
Shall not"i she derange. With ball
room shoe property OF Mrs Bliss she
stroked me crudely to forehead How
ellis by me. At oncely, hearing that
noise OF race-riot, thrush Sydney Katsu,
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1916-10-07

nervous. awaiting BRIDEGROOM who was
not yet. Then my Cousin NOgi elOpe
quickly to me.
Take Hon. Trusoe to aunty-roOm
where Hon. Bride can dressup,' he
holla in whisper. I do so. Miss Flu
riaoki do so. Pretty sOonly she came
out in pinkish OttOmabile cloak, look
ing several yards Of beauty
Next income Hon Sydney katsu. Jr..
in frockaway coat and snub express
sion. How I love YOU" report Hon.
Sydney. Then Rev Mr.. Sage Saki.
Japanese clergy. come 20 and commence
denouncing marriage ceremonial Man
& wife words was said, ring-slip mo-
ton was made. family connection was
declared. and all ysllOwish society in
rush TO Bride for kisskiss-
Except me Nervely / was thinking
what Hon. Mrs Boss would say II
clothing got home too late. after she
was there from party Therefore. 1
run speedy to aunty-rOOm expecting
for get those truSOe as quickly possible
But what I see when I got in there
Mrs. Sydney Katsu, ST.. Oldy Japanese
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1916-10-07

Wallace Irwin

Jr.. accompanied by fourteen uncles.
"Banzaii" al shout with increased
threats while numbering me with
jumps. Six 90 Katsu Uncles snath me-
to feet & eight 90 remainders OF that
family sieze TO my inflamed wrists and
elbows Thusly they swung me down.
stairs while I bumped considerable get
ting there until 1 sat in fractions
amidst my confusion
One hour-time pass by while I lay
there dying amidst weeds When L
could recover from that. I arose uply
and start limp-walking to home OF that
deary Mrs & Mr. Bliss.
When I come to house, I see cleo
tricity of light in bedroom window I
sneek in softly like butterflies walking
on jelly. Inside Hon Door there was
Mrs. standing with searchlight express
sion wondering what was.
Togo" she sayso, where in the
world have become Of my Hon. Tru-
soe2@
Burglar" I negotiate with talented
tell-lie-
He took" she execute baffably.
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1916-10-07

The warm August days called forth
surprising quantities of velvet hats.
At the Ambassadors. at the tea hour,
velvet everywhere 4 Louis XVI hat
of dark blue velvet. worn the other
afternoon at this famous restaurant
attracted much attention The draped
crown. which was much higher in the
back than in front, melted into brim
of erin lace that fell over the eyes
in fashion decidedly becoming and
alluring.
MANY mourning hats are large
simple toques having an edging OF
tulle that fails below the eyes. The
long crepe veil is arranged well to-
ward the back in such a way that the
fullness spreads out at each side"
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1916-10-07
The Daily Novelette,
THE PLOT THAT FAILED.

~IMON SIAIONS. the meanest man in
Pitchburg. felt that it was really
~ time TO give his fiancee a treat
He sat in her parlor indulging in free
handholds every night for three weeks
nov. and he simply must take her out
While he was passing the opera house,
he was dazzled by a brilliant idea He
inquired at the box office and was told
that the house was sold out for the
night. the biggest opera night in the
history Of the town
.'Oh, Luella." he scid TO Miss buds
What do you think of the idea Of
taking in the show at the opera house
tonight? Caruso's going to sing Elan
agan's a Man Again" Geraldine Farrar's
going to walk the tightrope. John Nc
Cormack's going 70 do a blackface turn
with somebody named Al 8IcGluck. and
everything. I'm sure ought 10 be able
TO get a couple OF nice seats for five
dollars apiece, OF maybe six. what do
care2"
After being coaxed for four-eighths
OF q second. Miss buds consented TO go,
and Simon Simons telephoned on Miss
Duds's phone to the FOrdalinO auto
agencq. asking that a car be sent TO
Miss Duds's address to give prospec-
tive purchaser a sample ride They
rode in style down TO the opera house.
only to be informed that not seat was
10 be had for cash or money.
Curses" said Simon SimOns vexedly.
well. LET'S go to the movies"
But just then a well dressed man in
a green derby stepped up with two
tickets. explaining. Glad to be able
to help you out. pardner. Ny grand
mothers down with the old infantile
paral and I can't take her out as I ex-
pected- You can have these two five
dollar tickets for what they cost me"
Simon Simons paid. and then tainted
so deeply that by the time he was re-
vived the first act-was over.
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1916-10-07

why you come to me talking like a
dressmaker2" L ask peevly.
Because Mus" he report slyiy ike
worms Are your Boss Lady for which:
you work a new BRIDE She are. Have
she not closet Of fashionable marriage
clothes2'
Has"
so ha, Then I merely ask you to
do a crime. Go sneekretly to lock
away where clothing is KEEP & bora six
co dresses of Newport appearance On
Wednesday night 1T 7.66 clOck-tim
snuggle them quietly to sun Of MikadO
Social Hall where ceremony will be
transpired by CLERICAL. AS soonly as
ring-slip words are said, you can take
those gOwnd-dresses back-away from
there"
7 will not be dishonest for rs"
groweli Therefore I must charge 12s
before doing so
Hon Nogi make promise for that and
depart off, while 1 set there wondering
how burglars can remain healthy.
Night Of Wedsday was there When
dinner eat was being pursued, I hear
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1916-10-07
Famous British Actor
Says Women Should Vote

London. Eng. Oct Sir Herbert Bier.
bohm Tree. the famous actor. said today his
recent American tour had converted him 10
woman suffrage.
I was especially struck with the part
women are TO play in the great fnterna-
tional decisions OF the future" said Sir
Herbert.
I had been against the suffrage move
ment. save in certain OF its more obviously
Just demands. before I went to the states
Now am absolutely in favor OF women hav-
ing the vote This because 7 feel that the
women who create life would be averse TO
destroying It. I think that women will
swell the chorus Of Let there be no more
wars think they will sing II in unison.
and they have earned the right TO be heard. -
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1916-10-07
Blue Velvet Fashions This Very Smart
Toque, Trimmed With Blue Wings

IT he modistes of Paris are showing
signs of activity. and there is
already much talk about the first
hat models for autumn. TIE leading
houses were ready early in August
with their winter hats for the Ameri-
can buyers. who arrived in advance
Of the regular season
While it is perhaps early for the
millinery openings" the buyer for a
leading New York importer said. Z
have bought a number Of hats for the
autumn ard find a decided change in
tbs styles, but there is as yet no one
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1916-10-07
Dunk Bolts, Regular Correspondent.
Copyright Adanss SYM et,.orv. atn-L,

" HE wife of Sim Flinders sent
him to Rye Straw Monday after
spool Of thread. and as the
storekeeper would not have any in I'M
til next week Sim decided to wait
there until it arrived, and is the guest
OF the storekeeper.
The deputy constable and Washing
ton Hooks have been hanging around
the moonshine stillhouse on Musket
Ridge for several days. The deputy
keeps order while Wash keeps order
ing.
Poke Eazley is proud that there
were plenty OF frogs this summer. as
they bothered the old miser with their
Eollering at night
Sim Flinders has brought back with
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1916-10-07

him from the Calf Ribs neighborhood
a leather bed made Of owl feathers.
While coming home with it on his
1 back the other night il was so soft and
a0wny ne Tell asleep while walking
along the road.
The old miser on Nusket Ridge is
now trying TO live on two hickorynuts
a day.
Yam Sims appeared in public last
sunday with new pair of pants and
striped necktie- They have made a
wonderful change in his appearance
and until they wear out he will rank
among the best people.
Fit Smith is having his shoes re-
modelled, and will occupy them next
week
There is talk OF another paper be-
ing launched at Tickville. The editor
OF the Tickville Tidings. who always
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1916-10-07

offencive and defencive Il is her
castle, and IL she knows how to pro-
vision it and garrison il properly. she
can sit at her dOnjOn window and laugh
at regiment Of peroxided young be-
Siegers- A dinner Of the things he likes
best viii do more to keep a man out OF
temptation of an evening than all the
Ten Commandments
All Of which is respectfully submitted
to brides.
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1916-10-07

water to make a light dough; turn out
on a pastry board. roll it out thin:
shape out the biscuits with a small.
round cutter, and lay in a creased pan
so they viii not touch: put a teaspoon
ful of grated maple sugar on the top
Of each put another biscuit on top OF
hot oven for about Enthusiastically
-MaearOni with Green PepPerS-Copy-
right, 1916, international News Service.
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1916-10-07

To Editor Good Housekeeper Maya
zine" who give considerable val ad-
vice to Wife about buy clothes. but
nothing TO Husband about how do so
when Bill Collection is there with ex
preston of peey-
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1916-10-07
Maple Sugar Biscuit.

XZOU will find these biscuit good to
eat either hot or cold. and they
are not difficult to make.
Sift together two cups OF flour. two
tablespoonfuls OF baking powder and
one-fourth teaspoonful Of salt Rub
in quickly with the tips of the fingers
one tablespoonful OF lard and butter
mixed, add slowly sufficient milk or
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1916-09-18
Music to Be
Featured at
Fashion Shou,

Special music has been arranged for
as a new feature for the opening Of
the annual Fashion show Friday night,
Sec. +. A. Whttcn OF the Oklahoma
City Retailers association announced
today.
Emery'S Oklahoma City concert band
will play selections on the downtown
streets during the principal hours of
the evening The band will be on Grand
avenue between and & o'clock and on
Main stree, from s to 9 o'clock, he
said.
MIR Whitten said all merchants are
planning to make this years Fashion
show the most spectacular in the ci,y's
history. Plans for the decorations al
ready are being made. All windows will
be veiled Friday during the day and
the curtains will be lifted at o'clock
in the evening.
The fact that no stores will be open
Friday night will give the small mer.
chants an even break with the larger
ones" Mr.. Whi,ten said "This means
that the big stores will not get mo-
nopoly on the crowds. hut that the peo-
Nlc will be constantly moving, thereby
getting glimpse OF all the beauties
displayed in all the windows"
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1916-09-18
OPERATORS WAIT
ON COAL MINERS
TO EFFECT PACT
Association Head Refuses 10
Discuss "0pen Shop"

Oklahoma coal operators are waiting
TO he1r from John Wilkinson. president
of district p OF the United Mine
Workers OF America, concerning a
meeting between operators and miners
to negotiate new contract for mining
The suggested new contract would he
planned to be efiectiv, for two years,
beginning August !, 1910
The operators association sent a
letter to the miners September y sug
gestlng a meeting. but up TO noon to.
day no answer had been received from
the miners president
Declines to Answer.
ID. ! Jordan, president OF the Okla
homa Coal Operators ASSOCIATION, who
is in the city, when asked il this delay
in reply from the miners indicated trou
Bile refused to max, a definite state
mcni
1--WE shall have to leave that to time, =
he said.
He also refused to make any com.
m.nt on the statements which have
been made to the effect that operators
OF Oklahoma, Texas, New Mexico and
Colorado are forming an association
Oklahoma operators withdrew from the
association with Kansas, Arkansas and
Missouri men at the recent Kansas City
meeting
Non Union Proposition.
"lf such an association is formed
will it mean ths open shop or non-union
operation in Oklahoma and Texas
mines as in the case OF New Mexico
and Colorado" Mr. Jordan was asked
II am not in position to give you any
information II such an association
were formed it would not necessarily
mean open shop or non union operation
in Oklahoma" he replied
The Oklahoma City times. [volume] (Oklahoma City, Okla.) 1908-1984, 1916-09-18
Tulsa Policeman
Is Thugs Victim

TULSA, Okla, Sept l8-(SpccialO
Two masked robbers robbed several
persons. including policeman, in a
Tulsa restauran, early today and after
marching their victims a quarter of a
mile down the Frisco railroad tracks
they bound and gagged them and made
their escape with about $40 IN cash
and several watches.
Mike Gribes who was in charge of
the restaurant was ohoked into uncon.
sciousness when one OF the robbers
rammed sock down his throat with
the muttle of his revolver, The vic
tim is IN hospital unconscious and
may die.