The Glasgow courier., 1916-12-01
Ginger Snaps

Nothing is quite so trying as sus-
pense, is there?
What would the hatters do without
elections?
California would have made up its
mercurial mind more quickly if either
of the contestants had been a native
son.
Tammany need expect no favors of
the White House, having failed to
"deliver the goods"
German soldiers now wear helmets
without spikes, but this is not neces-
sarily sign of increasing pacifsm.
Americas stand has been for peace,
complicated with an extensive manu-
facture of arms and ammunition.
Michigan did not vote for Wilson,
but it did vote for prohibition, so
Henry Ford may regard it as a drawn
battle.
Critics have decided that there is
really an American language. There
is, but it is to be spoken, not written.
Electing president is compara-
lively easy, but counting the ballots
is an awful Job.
No matter who plays, in most of
the football games the ticket scalpers
are winners.
One of the joys of close election
is the labor it affords experts in "ana--
lying the returns"
BY giving d'Annunzio so many
chances to be hero, Italy may be
trying to prove that it really loves
his poetry.
William J. Bryan may claim to
have come back in Nebraska if he
counts the prohibition victory as a
personal vindication.
Strictly modern elections begin to
resemble continued stories, which
leave the reader in suspense until the
next installment.
Cotton itself is so high that the
conscientious sheep resists the temp
tation to adulterate its product with
the vegetable staple.
Yes, let the eagle scream! United
States election news crowded the war
news entirely off the front pages.
| Chasing the elusive electoral vote
through the mazes of belated returns
is no kind of sport for a patriot with
a weak heart.
After the war, the city of New York
might secure the kaiser's services as
a rapid transit expert. His lightning
changes from front to front should
certainly qualify him.
Builders of our battleships may
work only eight hours a day, but our
enemies, when we have them may be
counted on to wrok the full twenty
:'our.
If the Teutons have not succeeded
in furnishing" Roumania appreciably,
they at least scared the life out of
Greece again.
Although free trade is no longer
an issue the British blockade is doing
its best work to make it one.
The most cheerful war prophet does
not find it possible at any time to
mention any date for peace less than
a year in the future.
Women who were once jocosely re-
ferred to as "talkative" now find
themselves classified to large de-
gree with the silent vote.
After the war Europe will be ex-
pected to settle down, work hard and
save up its money and get out of debt.
Fears are now entertained that
Villa will undertake to reverse the
program and "get" Carranza
The next we expect to hear from
Greece is that the allies have sent
King Constantine's crown to the
junk yard.
There may be nothing in the peace
talk being heard, but it is pleasing
subject all the same.
Paper is now so high that people
are beginning to understand why the
ancients inscribed their messages on
clay or stone tablets.
Those new dimes are lovely, but it
is pity that they did not come
along in the good old days, when
dime would buy ten cents worth of
anything.
In permitting a ship load of Turk
ish tobacco to come to this country,
the entente allies have shown that