davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Nevada County picayune., 1916-01-06
ARTISAN

After having several days of rainy weather we are glad to see the sunshine again and hope the pretty weather will continue until the farmers can get some of their land prepared for an- other crop.
 We hope the farmers of this community will again diversity their crops. Lots of wheat, corn, peas, potatoes, hogs and a little cotton.
 There is some sickness in this community attheapresent time. Misses Sarah Spoonamore and Gladys Witcher have been quite sick the past week with la grippe.
 A. R Collins of Artesian nov ed in the Gum Grove neighbor- hood last week.
 Miss Abbie Hale spent Xmas witt her parents, Mir. and Mrs, Wm Hale, at Laneburg.
 Roy F. Witcher left for Dodd- fige, Miller county. after spend in8 the holidays with home folks.
 The School Improvement As soclation met Friday afternoon, but owing to the bad weather all the members were not pre- sent. At the next meeting on Jan. 2S, we hope all members and as many visitors as possible will attend.
 We have fine school, and the parents should come out and visit the school and show their appreciation of what the teacher is doing for theii children.
 The Literary Society will meet Jan. 15.
 There will be preaching at Artesian the 3rd Sunday in Jan. Let every one attend that can.
 Mir. J. F. Witcher, and Misses Fora Witcher, Agnes and Cora Meador and Little Gladys Adams visited at. .Mrs. Spoonamore's. S. last week.
 Those who attended the Musi- cal at Mir. Sam Witcher's last Thursday night report a pleasant evening.
 Mir. and Mrs. w. C. Smart and Joseph Smart left for DeAnn, Monday.
 A happy and prosperous New Year to all.
The Nevada County picayune., 1916-01-06
Ozan Mercantile Co. PRESCOTT, ARKANSAS.

tors to churches and churches to pastors?"-J. w. Erwin and c. G. Lasetcr.
 Henry B. Almand.
 Clerk.
The Nevada County picayune., 1916-01-06

..Aey, or course. add the
 70 the price of fertilizer, and indirectly the farmers pay this inspection tax.
 The fertilizer inspection prov ed a good thing and preventeQ' the sale of worthless fertilizeEs The law authorizes me to apYoint four inspectors to take sXmples and have them analyzed to see if they come up to re2uirementsI However, the last Legislative failed to make aE' appropriation from the funds%n hand tq carry on the work or to pripf tags, consequently, have been un- able 10 h2Ve any inspection done since March 3O 1915. The fs- cal Y%r ended September 90, and. after that date new tags for uie season 9f 1915 l6 were re- ouired. Tb9re being no appro- priation, 1 have no funds with which to nave the tags printed. The law makes it a fnable off ense for an official of the State to/buy anything for the State on d credit. Hence, l am unable to furnish the tax tags. If the fertilizer is sold without tags, it will be a violation of law, pun ishable by fine of from $100 co to $500 co. Under these circum- stances 1t is not likely that the fertilizer people will undertake to sell fertilizer.
 If, as a result of this compli- eaton. the farmers who need commercial fertilizer should be ~Gnable to get il, their interests wiiR suffer. l am powerIess to rslieve the situation, however much Iam disposed to do so. It was greyous mlsta<e upon the part of &e. Legislature to fail to make the appropriation. | feel that if lS butj.tMir to say that the fault was entirely that of the Senate. Ire meMh&rS ot the House passed the appropSa- ton, but the Senate refusedstA accept the appropriation amend ment and. through |. Q Confe- ! renee Committee, it was killed. ! It is also but far to say that Senators Lundy. Futren, Ruff. Wagner, Ferguson and Repre- sentative Wood of Set astian county. are entitled to the gr, at est amount of credit. if any is due. for killing the appropria- tion, and bringing about the present dilemma It is also but fair to say that a roll call was never allowed to be taken.
 John H. Page,
 Commissioner.
The Nevada County picayune., 1916-01-06
BLUFF CITY

Everything is progressing very nicely, this week.
 The weather is very pleasant and we hope it will continue this week.
 J. M. Henry has been very ill but is some better at tknis writ ing. We hope he yIill soon re- cover. /
 Sam Byrd returned home last Sunday from Little Rock, and the report was a good time.
 A./E. Adams and C. ]. Askew left Sunday for Prescott, where they will attend court this week.
 Miss Zadie Gulley left\Sun/y for Coldwater, where SVeIwill begin her school again / :
 After spending XIs week with home folks, Ithur and Allen Starnes lefT for Denton, Texas, where th% are attending the State Normal. /
 Bluff City Basket Ball team expect tolplay Ckfdester team next Saturday, /on Chidester's grounds. /
 Tie people are progressing VTy nicely on their new church Duilding, They expect to have 1t completed in about a month and a. half from now.
 For Sale-One entire brick making outfit, including one moulding machine, one repress, horse and hand trucks and wheel barrows. Enough pallet boards to hold 20, GOO bricks. Kiln doors and gas fixtures for burning brick. Cheap for cash, or part cash and good time on balance. Would trade for land or stock.
 Call or write Picayune Office.
The Nevada County picayune., 1916-01-06
WEEKLY LETTER
Bureau of Mines, Manufactures
 and Agriculture.
The Fertilizer Situation.

As result of the failure of the last Legislature to appropri- ate money for the printing of tags and the enforcement of the fertilizer inspection law, 1t IS likely that the farmers will not be able to buy commercial ferti- lizer next season. The law re- tires the Commissioner ot ues, Manufactures and Agri-. gre to furnish fertilizer t<aA Q the manufacturers, mheI at the rate of 70 cents The tag money is paid tc Treasurer and kept II
 fund, and cannot be
 " other purpose eX.
 the expenses of
 .ction, etc. There
 fund $16, 2947 T.
 lanufacturers buy
 ,ev of course add the
The Penn's Grove record., 1916-06-16
WOMEN SUFFERERS
NEED SWAMP ROOT

Thousands upon thousands of women
have kidney and bladder trouble and never
suspect it.
Women's complaints often prove to be
nothing else but kidney trouble, or the
result of kidney or bladder disease.
If the kidneys are not in a healthy con-
dition, they may cause the other organs
to become diseased.
You may suffer a great deal with pain
in the back, headache, loss of ambition,
nervousness and may be respondent and
irritable.
Don't delay starting treatment. d..
Kilmers Swamp-Root, a physicians pre-
scription, obtained at any drug store, re-
stores healts to the kidneys and is just
the remedy needed to overcome such con-
ditions.
Get a fifty cent or one dollar bottle i'm,
mediately from any drug store.
However, if you wish first to test this
great preparation send ten cents to DIR.
Kilmer & Co, Binghamton, N. Y, for a
sample bottle. When writing be sure and
mention this paper.-Adv.
The Penn's Grove record., 1916-06-16
Then the Star Twinkled.

Long had he worshiped her at a dis
lance. but his shyness prevented him
from proposing.
Then, n night, for the sweet sake
of charity, a theatrical performance
took place, in which the charmer was
the leading woman and more adorable
than ever. Afterward the shy adj
mirer drew near his sweetheart, made
valiant by the sight of her beauty.
you are the star of the evening"" he
said, as they stood alone in a corner.
you are the first to tell me so"
said the damsel, with a happy blush,
Then" he retorted promptly, may
| claim my reward as an astronomer"
The woman looked puzzled.
What reward?" she asked.
why, the right to give my name
to the star l have discovered" the
young nan said, speaking boldly at
last.-Answers, London.
The Penn's Grove record., 1916-06-16
Painless Dentistry.

A tourist while doing California,
noticed a long shanty which displayed
the following sign: Teeth yanked
out without a twinge." AS he hap
pened to be suffering from toothache,
he entered the shanty and asked the
dentist:
DO you extract teeth without giving
pain?"
WAL. | reckon so, stranger"
"Ail right; pull this one out" in
dicating the offending molar.
The dentist whistled, and in walked
his assistant with a club.
Now, pard," quoth the dentist"
Stun him!"
The Penn's Grove record., 1916-06-16
Not Such a Fool.

Here's a strange case," said Mrs.
Spctter to her husband. IA mar they
called the town fool up in New Hamp-
shire died, and they weighed his brain.
1t was heavier than the average"
rs that all it says about him."
"Yes-except that he was for many
years entirely dependent on well-to-do
relatives"
"Huh-he was no fool. If you have
Well-to-do relatives. why use your
brains?"-Judge.
The Penn's Grove record., 1916-06-16
JOHN C. EvERSMAN

John C. Eversman will have a
large part in the work of directing the
publicity propaganda of the Repub-
licana during the coming presidential
campaign. Mr.. Eyersman has had long
experience in politics and in what
might be called political publicity.
For a long time he has been the con-
fidential associate of Representative
William B.. Mckinley of Illinois.
During the various periods of time
that Mr.. Mckinley was connected with
the Republican congressional cam
paign committee in one or another Of
fetal capacity, Mr.. Eversman worked
with him side by side. Between cam
paigns their association continued.
In fact. Mr.. Mckinley and Mr.. Evers-
ian have been bound together by
ties of labor and friendship for a
great many years.
Four years ago William B. Nc
Kinley took charge of William H.
Taft's campaign for the nomination for
The Penn's Grove record., 1916-06-16
Inv 1rlHH1 lLTMIIIILHGTHl11
SCOTT IS R%ESOURCEFUL

Congressman Frank D. Scott OF
Michigan is a man of resourcefulness
and capabilities. He was resourceful
ven back in the days when he was a
mere college student. There was a
certain course of study Scott was pur-
suing under the direction of a profess
sor whom we may call Hicks. Exami-
nation season approached and it oc
Cured to Scott that he knew only in a
very general and sketchy way the
things he might be called upon by
Hicks to write down on paper. More
over, he had a feeling that he was not
personally popular with Hicks.
The situation seemed extremely
grave to Scott, and he cast about for
some way in which to ingratiate him
self or Hicks. After a careful inquiry
in Hicks habits he found that the
professor passed the collection plate
in a small church. Scott began to at
tend that church. For three consecu-
tive Sundays-the three prior to the
The Penn's Grove record., 1916-06-16
Pleasant as Could Be.

"a number of women attended this
prize1ght."
Il hope non of them felt sick dur
ing the bout" said the humane man,
who thought perhaps the sight of
blood had upset the gentle creatures.
"Oh, no. The men were lot permit
ted to smoke, because of the fire risk,
and there were no rank cigar fumes to
offend their delicate nostrils."
The Penn's Grove record., 1916-06-16
FINANCIER OF YUCATAN

DR.. Victor L. Rendon of Yucatan,
statesman and %1nancier, probably will
be selected by General C~arranza as
head of a special financial commits
sion invested with authority to con-
duct preliminary negotiations for a
foreign loan for Mexico, according to
reports from Mexico City.
Doctor Rendon successfully nego-
tiated recently a $4,000, 900 loan with
American bankers for the Yucatan
farmers sisal marketing system. He
is a native of Yucatan and a graduate
of the universities of Mexico and
Paris, and won an enviable reputation
among his competitors by the ease
and success with which he handled
the sisal loan. Doctor Rendon was
one of the pioneers in the fight for
the establishment of a democratic
government in Mexico. He conducted
an active propaganda against the
Porfirio Diaz government and gave
his support to the Madero revolution.
The Penn's Grove record., 1916-06-16
ToRTURING SKIN TROUBLES
That Itch, Burn and DisfIgure Healed
by Cutleura. Trial Free.

Battle with plenty of Cuticura Soap
and hot water to cleanse and purify.
Dry lightly and apply Cuticura Oint-
ment to soothe and heal. This stops
itching instantly, clears away pimples,
removes dandruff and scalp irritations,
and heals red, rough, SORE hands.
Free sample each by mail with Book.
Address postcard, Cuticura, Dept. l.,
Boston. Sold everywhere.-Adv.
The Penn's Grove record., 1916-06-16
Reasons.

for divorce because his wife was
wasteful and extravagant.
"Will you give the court some spe-
cifc instances?" asked the lawyer.
Well, n day she goes and buys
three toothbrushes, one for herself aid
one for each of eae kids. And the
worst of it was, we already had one
good one."-Gargoyle.
The Penn's Grove record., 1916-06-16
Between Man and Wlfe.

"You ought to go over to see Jim
before the honeymoon is over and
congratulate him."
Eyes. and then after the honeymoon
is owe he'll remember my congratu-
lations and all his life he will think
| an a hypocrite. I'll wait awhile
and then go over and sympathize with
him."
You brute!"
The Penn's Grove record., 1916-06-16
TOO MUCH FOR UNTERMYER

Samuel Untermyer, Bethlehem
steel prince, Wall street attorney and
steel-trust and money-devil hunter,
was once counsel for the Pujo money
trust committee of the house.
There were a lot of witnesses be-
fore that committee, and many of
them were intensely hostile to MI.
Untermyer. One of these was Presi-
dent Hine of the First National bank
of New York. He was just as good a
dodger as Mr.. Untermyer was a ques-
toner. Mr.. Untermyer asked a ques-
ton about a mile long and Mr.. Hine
made a reply that would have reached
from New York to Oshkosh. Then
Mr.. Untermyer asked another ques-
ton, endeavoring to get Mr.. Hine
down to a simple answer. Mr..
Hine delivered another long answer,
which looked the same upside down,
right side up, backward or forward.
About half an hour was consumed
in this banter and Untermyer grew
The Penn's Grove record., 1916-06-16
Oh, Certainly Not.

II want to tell you something about
that Gadders girl" said Mrs. Twobble
in a half whisper.
I'm all attention" said Mrs. Dub
waite, leaning over so as not to miss
a word.
She read Boccaccio!"
ooh, but she reads his stories In
Italian. That isn't half as bad. you
know. as reading an English transla-
ton"
The Penn's Grove record., 1916-06-16
Different.

Redd-An automobile is 80 different
from a horse.
Greene-Why, of course.
You see, a horse goes faster when
he's going home than when going
away from home"
We'll, doesn't an automobile?"
"Oh, no; you see, an automobile
often has to be towed home"
The Penn's Grove record., 1916-06-16
Unusual PoIiteness.

Mrs. Myles-Rear your husband is
Just hack from Paris.
Mrs. Styles-Oh, yes.
How did he find Paris during the
awful war;
"Tiresome. You see they have wom-
an conductors in Paris, and my hus-
band will " keep his seat while a
lady is standing in a car"
The Penn's Grove record., 1916-06-16
Couldn't Touch Him.

Il hear we are face to face with a
diamond famine" remarked the talka.
tive old gentleman.
"Umph!" replied the occupant Of a
neighboring stool in a lunchroom, who
was making a meal on coffee and
"sinkers." Il could be face to face
with a diamond famine for n~inety-nine
years and not be aware of it."
The Penn's Grove record., 1916-06-16
Let II Go at That.

Peckem-Why is the telephone like
matrimony, my dear?
Mrs. Peckem-Oh, l suppose it's be-
cause n doesn't always get the right
party.
Peckem-That isn't the right answer
but it is good. and we'll let 1t go
at that.
The Penn's Grove record., 1916-06-16
Opposed to II.

"Pop!"
Eyes, my son."
Il heard today that a complete
washing equipment for tourists. which
can be folded to occupy little space in
an automobile, has been invented"
"That is very nice, my boy"
Very nice? Isn't there any place
in the world a fellow can go where he
doesn't have to wash?"
The Penn's Grove record., 1916-06-16
Cow Eats $500 in Bills.
brute!'

John Layton, a farmer near Durham,
had no faith in banks. Now he has
no faith in cows. One prize Guernsey
ate $500 in bills which he had hidden
in his barn. Darn the cows" said
Layton. "They have no respect for
money."-Durham On. c. Dispatch to
Philadelphia Inquirer.
The Penn's Grove record., 1916-06-16
Handicapped

Whats de reason" inquired Loiter-
ing Luke, dat you can't go ahead an
git yourself reformed?"
It's jes' hard luck" replied Plod-
ding Peter. Il never could manage to
git arrested in a way dat would give
me de advantage Of de right kind of
a penitentiary."
The Penn's Grove record., 1916-06-16
Exposed Position.

What do vol suppose would hap
pen to this country if we were attacked
by a powerful foreign foe?" asked the
alarmist.
81 haven't got around to that yet"
answered the citizen of a prosperous
coast city.
What do you mean?"
1--WE been too busy trying to figure
out what would happen to our town."
The Penn's Grove record., 1916-06-16

Peevan. l would like the witness to be made to answer yes or no. 3" Mr..
Untermye demanded, "and l would like the committee to explain its rights"
Chairman Puo then delivered an orationb in which he said in substance
that The witness must make a definite answer or decline to answer al all.
All right" said Hfne, I'll try to answe your question. What ws i?"
Mr.. Untermyer tried to ask it all over. He stumbled O. the second sen
tence and then said:
Let the stenographer read the question"
At that point the stenographer arose and said:
"Th eother fellow took that part of the testimony and has justl left the
building to g downtown and transcibe it.. 1 Just can in"
Mr.. Untermyer knitted his brows together in deep thought Then he said:
"The witness is excused"
The Penn's Grove record., 1916-06-16
Really!

Miss Cat the piano, angrily)-As
soon as l open my mouth that miser-
able dog at the neighbours begins to
howl.
Cook (consolingly)-Never mind,
miss, that dog bowls even when I
sing!-Fliegende Blaetter (Munich).
The Penn's Grove record., 1916-06-16
Mixed Benefits.

I'VE want to introduce the blessings
OF civilization among you"
Eyes" answered the savage. 1.-The
only trouble is that when you also in
troduce your improved war mechanism
SO many of US won't live to enjoy
them"
The Penn's Grove record., 1916-06-16
His Speciality,

Hokus-Scribbler has had no less
than nine plays rejected.
Pokus-What is he doing now?
Hokus-Writing essays on the de-
cline Of the drama.-Life.
The Penn's Grove record., 1916-06-16
What's IN Use,

I'm told the monkey language
Close study will repay,
But cen could 1 converse with them,
I'd nothing ave to say.
The Penn's Grove record., 1916-06-16
Not Absorbinu.

Have you read Scribson's latest
novel;"
Eyes. l bought it to while away 8
railway journey"
How did you like it,"
Judge for yourself. / was on a
local train that stopped At every sta
ton. and l cen repeat their names
from memory"
The Penn's Grove record., 1916-06-16
Works Both WAYS.

The Bear-Isn't it strange that a
few gallons of oil will calm a storm
at sea?
The Bull-Oh, l don't know. A few
drops will start a storm in Wall street.
The Penn's Grove record., 1916-06-16
The Quality of Mercy

The Quality of Mercy.
Country JUSTICE find you not
guilty and fine you 81.
observation-disclosures
Justice-Now, shut up! If you'd
been guilty I'd er fined you $40!
The Penn's Grove record., 1916-06-16
Fixing the Blame.

Miss Prudeleigh is awfully shy.
isn't she?" remarked young Mugs.
YES" rejoined the fair widow. Il
wonder If she gets it from her moth
err"
No; from her father, l imagine"
said Mugs. Il understand he used to
be a great poker player"
The Penn's Grove record., 1916-06-16
Supervision.

A business man exclaimed: "How nice
So many strive my shop to rum,
That L may simply take advice
And give my time to rest and fun"
The Penn's Grove record., 1916-06-16
cutie So,

isn't this ballet scene rather rough
fun?"
Perhaps, but what can you expect
but ~hoTseplay from a pony ballet?'
The Penn's Grove record., 1916-06-16

examinaton-he occupied a seat in that part of the church which comprised
Hicks collection territory. When Hicks came to his seal, Scott rather osten-
tauousy dropped a large silver dollar into the plate with a loud noise. Each
Sunday, mind you, for three weeks he borrowed a dollar and did that Then
he went to his examination and slipped through by a narrow but safe margin.
And he never found out whether he got through owing to his store of
information on the subject or his vulgar display of wealth and generosity.
The Penn's Grove record., 1916-06-16
NOT H M E.

Booth Harrington, congratulated
on his vivid and poetical portrayals
OF colored characters. told a story at
a dinner in New York:
AN old colored man." he said, went
to the polls n day to register.
"'Wha YOUR name, uncle?' the
me am George Washing
old fellow answered.
Observation-Disclosures, eh?' said the
clerk. We'll, George, are you the fell
low that cut down the cherry tree?'
no. sah,' said the old mar. No
sab, / amt. / amt done no work at
all. sab, TO nigh onter free years.
The Penn's Grove record., 1916-06-16

the presidency. At that time Mr.. Eversman vas with him as h 70 had bee with
him before and has been with him since. 1t is understood that the Republicans
intend to do much along publicity lines between now and next November
Mr. Eversnan will have much work to do, but he will be equal % IT. He is
d member of the National Press club in Washington and is a great favorfte
with newspaper men through the country. He las spent most of his time in
the city of WashingtonVn the Last ten or fifteen years.
The Penn's Grove record., 1916-06-16
Suitable Occupation,

What is that flirting grass widow
trying to do"
"To make hay while the sun shines"
The Penn's Grove record., 1916-06-16

Caesars wife didn't have to live in
the suburbs to be gossiped about.
The Penn's Grove record., 1916-06-16

rs he a good provider?"
81 should say he is. He keeps his
wife busy over a hot stove every day
cooking the stuff he provides"
The Penn's Grove record., 1916-06-16

do you have to be examined by a
physician before joining the Aviation
club?"
NO; not until after you have made
your first flight"
The Penn's Grove record., 1916-06-16

Snake bites cause comparatively
few deaths.
The Penn's Grove record., 1916-06-16

Burma has 4,730,S10 oxen, 1880
goats and / ,080,9 8 buffaloes.
The Penn's Grove record., 1916-06-16

Reggy-What do you suppose l said
when she called me a fool?
Peggy-Said! What could you say?
The Birmingham age-herald., 1916-04-10
DEFINITE WORD IS
 EXPECTED TODAY United States Will Soon Be Ready to Decide on Sub
 marine Question

Washington. April 9.-The administra- ton expects to be in a position within the next 4S hours to determine what shall be the next step of the United States in the situation resulting from the nu- merous disasters which have recently overtaken merchant ships carrying Amer ican citizens.
 Secretary Lansing said tonight he had not received official confirmation of press dispatches announcing Germanys dis claimer of responsibility for the explo- son which damaged the Sussex. He ex- poets definite word of some kind tomor- row. At the same time he expects to receive number of affidavhs secured from survivors of the Sussex by the American embassies in London and Paris.
 All the available evidence will be con- sdered by the President and his cabi- net Tuesday.
 Without exception opinion was withheld. It was strongly intimated today that high
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