davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-02-17
Heard at the Club.

"Jimson has become a very firm be-
lever in signs" remarked Black.
What caused it?" asked White.
why, he pickeo up a horseshoe in
front of his house yesterday, and
when he went in he found note from
his wife saying that she'd run away
with the chauffeur.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-02-17

Kindly Guard suppose you look
forward to your day Of release, don't
you?
No. 5000-Yes, and it makes me
nervous. Yer see I'm in fer bigamy
and my four wives promised to meet
me at de gate.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-02-17
UNPLEASANT RECEPTION.

sage"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-02-17
Somewhat Ambiguous

What do they mean when they say
that girl is passing fair?'
II dunno. Sounds to me like 1t
might mean that she is getting to a
stage where her looks are going back
on her."
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-02-17
A WISE CAR.

A German general, taken prisoner,
related at Petrograd the following re-
marks of the kaiser: 81 was certain
of crushing the Russians when they
were freely given to drink, but now
that they are sober the task is much
more difficult!' And he added in a
melancholy tone, "Who on earth could
have foreseen the antialcohol coup
d'etat perpetrated by Nicholas III"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-02-17
Expert Description.

How was it," asked the teacher,
that Achilles didn't take part in all
of the Greek Trojan contests?"
81 suppose he could do better writ
ing up the SERIES" answered the wise
kid of the class
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-02-17
FATHERS GONE TO WORK AGAIN

Everybody works but father.
He sits around all day;
His feet in front of the fire,
Smoking his pipe of clay;
Mother takes in washing.
So does sister Ann,
Everybody works at our house,
But my old man.
The sequel to this once popular lit
tie song:
Fathers gone to work again.
Since the town went dry.
He comes home of evenings
"Feeln' mighty spry;"
Mothers down town shopping,
So is sister Ann.
Now that he is sober,
They're proud of the "old man"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-02-17
MISSING Evidence.

Mary-Hazel doesn't show her age
at all, does she?
Aimee-I should say not. But you
can see where she scratched it out of
the record page in the family Bible.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-02-17
ImposSibiIity.

Are you trying to pull some wires
in that communication you're send
ing?"
Cant. This is a wireless mes
sage"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-02-17
Substantial Ones.

Edith-You must speak to papa
first. Surely you don't expect him
to make the advances, do you?
Jack-Well, if he doesn't, l don't
see how we are going to get married.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-02-17
a MiIder COMPLAINT.

''Is your husband suffering from in
somnja, madam
lob, no, doctor, nothing so bad as
that. It's just that he can't sleep of
nights"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-02-17
At the St. Louis Country Club.

Marie-Egbert proposed last night.
Millie-And did you make him wait
for an answer?
Marie-Indeed did. Why, the poor
fellow didn't get away till one o'clockl
Judge.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-02-17
Partial Success.

Il will not lend you the sum you
mention, but though l see through
your promises to pay, l may spare
you $10."
"Ay, an X-ray of hope!"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-02-17
His Likeness.

THAT old society beau reminds me
of man giving the finishing touch
to his costume"
How SOP"
He is always buttonholing the
buds"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-02-17
Always Late.

"Hindthought is better than fore
thought"
"Oh, l don't know. I'd be a rich
man today If I had thought of lot
of my ideas first
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-02-17
She Could Do Two Thinus.

Madam" said the tramp, could
you give hungry fellow something
to eat? ?"
YES" she replied, land can also
give an idle man some work"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-02-17
A FAVoRITE CLEANSER.
Avoid Auto-intoxicatlon by Using Or
kennedys FaVorite Remedy.

NenHeuyS FaVoTltS hcHcuys
This great remedy cleanses bowels
of poisonous wastes which cause auto
intoxication, or "self-poisoning," the
main cause of kidney and blood affec-
tions; is also a direct cleanser Of kid
neys and bladder, aiding them to work
properly. Take DR.. David Kennedy
Favorite Remedy upon first signs OF
bowel and kidney trouble and avoid
danger. Grateful thousands helped
just in time, when other medicines
failed. Years of success. All drug
gists sell it. Write Kennedy Co.
Rondout, N. Y, for free trial-one
dose proves merit.-Adv.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-02-17
Trlbute 10 Femlnlnltv.

When man loves woman 1t is of
nature; when a woman loves man
it is of grace-of the grace that won.
an makes by her loveliness.-Cnarles
3. Deems
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-02-17

Simkins-Professor Bragg has made
study of every known disease.
Timkins-What does he know about
them?
Simkins-Eyerything except the
cure.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-02-17
Comparlsons.

THE telephone is a great conven-
often calls me up"
You're lucky. Mine always calls
me down"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-02-17

my doctor sized up my pile pretty
accurately" "How's that?"
HE said l was as sound as a dollar
and that was all had."-Judge.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-02-17

tiZing:
Escalloped Corn and
Oysters.-This is a good
dish to use with a few
oysters for additional
flavor. A pint or less
may be used. Drain the
liquor from a can OF
pint of oysters and mix
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-02-17
PREPAREDNESS
To Fortify The System Against Oh

To Fortify The System Against Grip
when Grip is prevalent LAXATIVE BRoMO
QUININE should be taken, as this combination
Of Quinine with other ingredients, DESTROYS
germs. acts as Tonic and Laxative and thus
keeps the system In condition to withstand
Colds Grip and Influenza. There is only one
BRoMO QUININE." E. W. GROVES sig
nature on box. csc.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-02-17

| UHlcS. 1 was ReG~
ing worse every day.
/ had chills, my head
would ache, I was
always tired. / could
not walk straight
because of the pain
in myback and / had
| pains in my stom-
ach. l went to a
doctor and he said I
must go under an
operation, but ]. did
not go. I read in
the papar ah0ut
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-02-17
Backing sunshiny Judqment

Il suppose you are what they call
an optimist?"
No. l used to be called an opti-
mist. Now I'm known as an overcon-
fident Spectator"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-02-17
Rather a handican.

do you think nickname is an as
set in politics?'
That depends on what sort of nick
name it is
mo doubt"
For instance, candidate of my ac-
quaintance is known among his init
mates as Imogene.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-02-17
Cruel Comment.

Ambitious Amateur-When l go on
the stage, expect my wife to sup
port me.
Cynical Friendly taking in wash
ing?
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-02-17
Way of the World.

Man wants but little here below.
Because he's too polite
To interfere when women go
For everything in sight,
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-02-17


Add bayleaf, half a dozen pepper
corns, and tablespoonful of minced
parsley. Simmer Is minutes, strain
and serve with diced fried bred.
PURGE of carrots.-Fry brown in
butter one cupful of carrots, cut in
dice. Add enough beef stock to
cover and simmer until soft. Add six
cupfuls of stock, bring to a boil, and
add the yolks Of two eggs, beaten.
with two tablespoonfuls of cream.
Dutch Soup.-Cook together a car
rot and an onion in boiling sailed wa
ter. Rub through a sieve, season with
salt and pepper and add a teaspoon
full of sugar Add five cupfuls of beef
stock reheat and serve.
Split Pea Soup.-Soak over night
four cupfuls of split peas in cold water,
to cover, adding pinch of Soda Drain
and add to eight cupfuls of beef stock.
Add head Of celery, sliced carrot
and an onion chopped fine. Season with
salt, pepper and curry powder. Strain
through coarse sieve into tureen,
rubbing the pulp through the sieve.
Serve with croutons diced fried
bread).
Savory Rice Soup.-Add cupful of
cold boiled rice to four cupfuls Of
beef stock. Simmer until the rice is
very soft, then rub through a fine
sieve and return to the fire. Season
to taste, thicken with the yolks Of
two eggs, beaten with half cupful Of
cream.
Tomato Soup.-Cook two quarts of
tomatoes with two onions, two car
rots and half cupful of chopped raw
ham. Add two quarts of veal stock.
strain, season and reheat. Thicker
with one tablespoonful each of -four
and butter, cooked together; blend
with little of the stock and add;
bring to boil, season with salt, but
ter, pepper and a bit of sugar; serve
with croutons.
Veal stock thickened with little
cooked sage and enriched with beat
en- eggs makes a most delicious and
nourishing soup.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-02-17
Pretty LARGE.

What big ears he has"
so big that his head seems merely
q connecting link between them"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-02-17

"Jimson doesn't cut any ice as a
skater, does he?"
mo, but he breaks lot of it,
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-02-17

In China old men play at ball and
fly kites while children fold their arms
and look on
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-02-17
Why He Quit,

What did he have to say for him
self"
Nothing. His wife was with him"
Judge.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-02-17

Use Murine after Exposure in Cold,
Cutting Winds and Dust. 1t Restores,
Refreshes and Promotes Eye Health.
Good for all Eyes that Need Care.
Murine Eye Remedy Co., Chicago,
Sends Eye Book on request.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-02-17
Help! Help!

1 know lot of maidens fair,
And widows gay, as well;
And this explains my missing heart
But which has it, I can't tell.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-02-17
Evidently suited.

Ethel-Is the man you are engaged
to at all bookish?
Marie-Well, yes; pocketbookish.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-02-17

Piles Relieved by First Application
And cured in to IA days by PAZO OINTMENT, the
universal remedy for all forms of Piles Druggists
refund money IL 1t fails. &c.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-02-17

A lawyer doesn't know everything
but he thinks a client thinks he does.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-02-17
No Change.

Evelyn-How old is Mabel?
birthdays.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-02-17

Are we living too fast?"
Maybe so. But there doesn't seem
to be any way to apply speed limit.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-02-17

Members of the New York fire de-
partment are given a military training.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-02-17
GOOD THINGS FOR THE TABLE.

This is combination which is I'M
common but will be found most appe-
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-02-17

1t is easy to find man who is will
ing to grunt while you lift.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-02-17
WOMAN AVOIDS
OPERATION
Medicine Which Made Sur
geon's Work Unnecessary.

Astoria, N. Y. -"For two years
was feeling III and took all kinds Of
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-02-17

Hamburg has an experimental plant
that obtains power from the ebb and
flow of North sea tides
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-02-17

81 understand that Gotrox married
his wife for her figure
We'll, not exactly. think he was
influenced to a large extent by the
ciphers which followed it."
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-02-17
WHY SUFFER SKIN TROUBLES
When a Postcard VIII Bring Free
Samples of Cuticura?

Which give quick relief for all itch
ing, burning, distiguring skin troubles.
Battle with the Cuticura Soap and hot
water. Dry and apply Cuticura Oint-
ment to the affected part They stop
itching instantly and point to speedy
healment often when all else fails.
Free sample each by NAH with Book.
Address postcard, Cuticura, Dept. L,
Boston. Sold everywhere.-Adv.~
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-02-17
SYMPOSIUM OF soups.

On stay-at-home night try Span.
Ish onion soup.
Evening star., 1916-05-25
The Bridesmaids Dress.

Materials for the gowns of brides
maids and maid of honor must be in
keeping with that selected by the bride.
II the bride wears taffeta. the maids
may have net overdresses on taffeta
foundations. If crepe de chine is Sc
lected for the bride, all the gowns must
be made of this to some extent.
The gowns of maid of honor and
bridesmaids should be sufficiently diff
ferent to give the maid of honor her
full due as parsonage separate from
the other bridesmaids. Both can also
be trimmed with the same kind and
pattern of lace, and it is a pretty idea
TO have them possess one or two points
in common. while it is of great i'm
portance to see that both are designed
with distinct similarity in line. OF
course. the bridesmaids are all dressed
alike, or at least their frocks are made
alike. though the color may differ.
Different summer flowers, such as
daisies, violets, ragged robins, forget
me-notS and moss roSebuds, could be
used on gowns all of the same color to
add little variety to the bridesm al Is
If desired, or different colored tulles
Canary yellow with yellow pansies.
pale pink with moss rosebuds, pale blue
with ragged robins. seafoam green
with daisies. pale lavender with vio-
lets and silver gray with delicate pop
pies would make a charming group of
bridesmaids.
When hat is not worn, narrow vel
vet ribbon fillets can be used to bind
the hair. or wreaths of glossy leaves
each wreath having in it one flower
ike those used on the gown.
Evening star., 1916-05-25
TODAY'S HOUSEHOLD
AFFAIRS.
BY MARY LEE,

Every book we pick up on the sub
ject of food and health these days en-
phasizes the necessity Of coarse food
and discourses on the crimes commit
ted against the human system by a diet
Of denatured, demineralized white
flour.
We read resentfully and throw down
the book with the exclamation, well
I'm not going to live on bran mash and
other horse feedl If I've got to die
propose to die enjoying my food!'
Then along comes our friend the Fa-
nous Cook-lady. Whats all this?'
she asks. You say you want to en-
joy your food? Well, there is no rea-
son why you should not. Let me make
you acquainted with my old standby
rye meal.
Rye meal will not be so hard to fin6
as it is today as soon as people real
ize how good it is and create demand
for it. The old-time cook knew how tc
handle it. or rather the old-time brick
oven, which baked the loaf slowly and
thoroughly, had much to do with the
popularity of rye bread in those days.
Now we connect a certain soggy damp
ness with rye bread which Is the resul,
of rapid baking In modern ovens.
Il set my sponge the evening before
Evening star., 1916-05-25

went on the Cook-lady. now launch
ed on her favorite topic, which in
sures lightness and good texture. At
o'clock I heat one cupful and a half
Of milk to the scalding point in the
double boiler. add two level tablespoon
fuls Of lard. a third of a cupful Of sugar
and teaspoonful of salt.
When lukewarm add one whole yeast
cake. dissolved in q quarter Of cup
full Of lukewarm water, and mix in
three cupfuls of fine whole wheat hour.
This sponge will be light and foamy
before 8 o'clock, when enough rye meal
should be mixed In to make a dough
stiff enough to knead for a few min
utes. Cover and let rise over night,
and early in tho morning cut the dough
down. knead 1t little, and put in a
large. round pan. Let the dough rise
until 1t has doubled in size: bake in a
modern oven.
Then try my rye mufnnS some cold
morning for breakfast
"Sift one cup of rye meal or flour. one
cup of white flour, q quarter Of a cur
Of sugar, half a level teaspoonful OF
salt and three level teaspoonfuls OF
baking powder: beat one egg, add one
cup of milk and beat rapidly into the
dry materials. Fill hot creased muf-
fin pans and bake.
"Or If you are one Of those who feel
that a winter morning without grid
die cake is somehow started wrong
try this: Sift two cups of rye -four
one cup of graham -four. and one cur
Of white flour, with rounding table.
spoonful of sugar, half a level tea.
spoonful of salt and four level table.
Evening star., 1916-05-25

Shoulder Capes Are Added.
When these garments are newly
made, they follow the fashion of the
Evening star., 1916-05-25
OURNES M7O
| LAND

The gown the properly costumed
woman-she who harmonizes frock
and function-fnds most useful Is
made after the semi-dressy model 1t
may be called a luncheon or bridge
dress, as it is too elaborate for morn
ing wear and too simple for formal
afternoon function.
The smart frock shown in the illus
tration is an excellent example of this
type 1t is made of natural pongee,
as planned by its designer; but fabric
and color may be adapted to taste and
complexion.
Cording, which has from time to
time been granted a place in trim
mings Is again in the limelight, and
this dress is trimmed in pongee cord
ing matching the frock. The skirt.
rather full model. measuring. when
finished. five yards around, has three
rows of cording edging it. and the ir-
regularly shaped tunic has the cording
applied in a conventional design at
either corner. The same finish is ap-
piled to sleeves. collar and little simu-
lated bolero jacket. Small pongee-cov-
cred bullet buttons and loops fasten
the frock.
Nine and a half yards of fabric
Evening star., 1916-05-25
Packing Lunch Basket.

With the inexhaustible supply of
paper napkins. cups. dishes and mois-
ture-proof wrappings in which to carry
a good luncheon from home success
fully, it is no longer the task it once
was, and the carried luncheon can be
more economical. attractive and nour-
ishing than ever.
A fresh napkin should go into every
box A roll of paraffin paper should be
kept on hand for wrapping sandwiches,
cookies and cakes, while any cold pud-
ding or dessert, such as custard, rice,
cornstarch, gelatin. preserves, as well
as baked beans or any nicely dressed
fish, meat, vegetables or fruit salads
is easily carried in one of the stiff
paper cups. These are made with
covers that fit securely. and they
come in all sizes from one-eighth of
pint to one quart. Custards and
similar puddings may be baked In these
cups, and gelatin or blanc mango may
be poured into them while warm.
Because of it's convenience the sand
wich will always be a favorite, but
there should be a variety in the bread
used as well as in the filings. There is
white bread, crushed wheat, graham.
rye. gluten, nut, raisin, steamed brown
bread, and it need not always be bread;
rolls and biscuits may be used to good
advantage. There is other nourishing
food than meat for filing; other
sweets than jam. Cream cheese and
ground nuts, marmalade and nuts, dates
and nuts, nut butter and dates. raisins
and figs ground together into a paste.
Eggs may be cooked slowly for twenty
minutes, chilled, pressed through a
sieve and seasoned with salt. pepper
and melted butter. Sardines or other
fish may be added at times.
To simplify the matter for the one
who puts up the luncheon, a list of
sandwiches and other appropriate foods
should be kept in a convenient place.
Three or four sandwiches made of we'll
baked bread. spread with plenty of
good butter and filled generously with
chopped beef, mutton, chicken or finely
ground nuts, and a custard some
fresh fruit. will supply all the neces-
sary nourishment in most cases For
variety or convenience an assortment
of two or more kinds of sandwiches
may be given.
School lunches for child - Raisin
and fig paste sandwiches with whole
wheat bread; cup custard. Steamed
brown bread and butter sa '-:ches:
rice pudding; apple. Minced lib and
celery sandwiches with whi bread;
grapes; cookies Chopped sand
Evening star., 1916-05-25

wiches with lettuce; orange: ginger
bread. Date and nut. ground fine. sand
witches with graham bread; chocolate
pudding. Peanut butter sandwiches
with whole wheat bread: fruit gelatin.
Roast beef sandwiches. fig sandwiches
with whole wheat bread: rice pudding:
apples. Cheese and lettuce sandwiches
with rye bread. second joint of chicken:
bread pudding with raisins; orange.
Tongue sandwiches: jam sandwiches
with white bread: cup custard: banana.
Egg and lettuce sandwiches. jelly sand
wiches with graham bread; sweet
chocolate, grapes.
Lunches for older people Egg and
sardine sandwiches with rye bread
orange; banana. Marmalade and nut
sandwiches with gluten bread; bread
pudding with raisins, apple. Cream
cheese sandwiches with nut bread, with
lettuce. grapes or pears; sponge cakes
Whole wheat rolls. fig and date filling
orange; sweet chocolate. Smoked bee1
sandwiches with onions; cup custard
oatmeal waters. Bread and butter sand.
wiches; stuffed tomato salad; figs; gin.
ger cookies. Tongue sandwiches with
rye bread; potato salad: raisins. nuts
orange.
Evening star., 1916-05-25
NEW COATS THAT SERVE AS GOWNS.

hour. which calls for some manner oil
shoulder adornment, usually in the
form of a cape. Another material thar
the foundation one may be used, ano
If one wants to adopt the West Point
fashion of throwing back both corners
of the cape over the shoulders. theI
these corners may be lined with con-
trasting color.
The sketch shows coat made of soft
blue cloth with the fullness of the skirt
held in by cravat belt that fastens al
the side. The large sleeves are held in
by tight cuffs and the shoulder cape is
made of corded silk in the same shade
of blue. The coat carries its own high
collar of glazed. white cambria.
These cambria collars were brought
out in February, and, so far, they have
not received much consideration; but
the dressmaker who wants d novel
touch finds it here.
Evening star., 1916-05-25
RECIPE MISCELLANY.

Omelet with Rum and Preserves-Bsat
the yolks OF six eggs with six table
spoonfuls Of sweet milk: when well
beaten add the whites. beaten to a stiff
froth. and mix two well together with
more beating. Make the pan hot. put
in the butter and when It Is melted pour
in the eggs. When the eggs are set at
the edges. with the middle still quite
soft. pour in strawberry or goose
berry preserves; fold over the other
side. fastening the corners under so as
, to hold in the filling. and then slip on
to plate and finish browning in the
oven. Butter the top. sprinkle 1T with
powdered sugar and drench it with q
cupful of Jamaica rum. Set this on IRE
and serve at once.
Caulihower Fritters-Steam or boil
caulihower until tender. Drain and
separate into flowers. Dip each in bat
ter and cook in deep. hot fat until
brown. Drain on brown paper, sprinkle
with salt, and serve.