davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1916-12-02
saves the Tires.

He doesn't look like very impor-
tant part Of n big automobile organi-
xution. this stopped. grizzled man. but
the president of = great m0toraar eom-
pany snys that Magnet Bill'' saves his
salary dozen times over every day
he works Rain or shine. summer or
winter "Mngnet Bill may be seen
walking slowly about the automobile
plunt. his eyes ON the ground. Mag
net Rill'' gets bis nickname from the
fact that his tools consist solely Of one
tin bucket and big steel mnRnet
strapped to the end OF shovel handle.
II Is his duty to snve automobile tires
by removing from the roadway every
nall and bit Of metal that might cause
a punrture. Thousands Of cars nre run
over the roadway to the testing place,
and 1t ia figured that without the pre-
caution taken BY "Magnet Rllf' the
cost for cut and punctured tires would
be $4,000 every year.-Popular Science
Monthly and Worlds Advance.
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1916-12-02
ORIGIN Of a Japanese Dance.

The origin Of the Kume-mat. the
dance performed Mt the coronation Of
the mikado. Il. traced to Jimmu fenno,
an early hero. who while on his east.
ern expedition found certntn chief
tain called TsuchigumO most obstinate
In his resistance and unsubduabie.
Thereupon he ordered u Kume M.
shine MikOtO to entice out the chief.
tain, TO whom sake was offered and
dances were shown. with the result
that finally he was overcome and slain.
The descendants of D Kume Nushino
Mikoto put this fact into songs and
music. from which sprang the dance
ArgOnaut
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1916-12-02
MOST ANCIENT TREATY.
Carved In stone on the Walls Of Two
Egyptian Temples.

Carved In Stone on the Walls Of Two
Egyptian Temples.
On the walls of two of Egypt's great.
est temples. that of Karnak and the
Ramesseum at Thebes. carved Up the
everlasting stone Of the dry land of
the Nile. says the Christian Herald, Is
the Oldest International treaty known
to man. Rameses the Great. one OF
the signers. is the best known man Of
remote antiquity. khetasar 0he car
of the Kheta or Hittites,, the other par.
ty TO the treaty, is unknown except to
a few. and his nation is little known
even to the scholars.
The Hittites were mighty race.
whose empire. equal in rank with the
mighty empire Of Egypt and Babylo-
MIA. bnce extended over 100000 square
miles of territory in Asia Minor and
Syria A few years ago practically
nothing was known Of the life and CIV
Ilization of these mysterious people.
They are mentioned in the Bible and
In the Egyptian and Assyrian records.
but until very recently their own story
had never been read by modern man.
Today. thanks to the excavations that
were carried on at the capital city Of
Carchemish. much has been learned
about this great group Of tribes. and
orderly evidence about them IL now
available for the first time In 1000
years.
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1916-12-02
cLovu FORMATIONS.
Why the Masse. Of Moisture Are Able
to Float In the Air. y


Clouds consist OF particles Of con
densed wnter vnpor anu Ii. 'oiiie 'nses
of extremely fine splc,iles Of lee. which
Is also formed from water vap0r. Wa
ter vapor which arises by evaporation
from the surface Of seas. lakes. etc.
Is lighter than dry mir ut the same
temperature md pressure. 1t IN also
Invisible
1t disseminates itself through the
atmosphere and uscends to great
heights There. owing to the fail of
temperatures and to other causes. II
begins to condense into particles which
are slightly heavier than air and which
become visible clouds.
Owing to the influence OF winds and
Of. rising currents as well us to the
fact that the condensed PARTICLES are
nearly us light MS air the clouds remain
doating. like fine suspended mntter In
water. until further condensation ere
ates particles of sufficient size to form
raindrops. whose relative great weight
brings them rapidly to the ground.
That clouds do slowly descend even
when not condensed into rain may be
observed when they are seen to dis
solve and disappear without apparent
cause. This is caused by the clouds
descent to level where rise OF tenn
pernture causes the condensed water
vapor to revolatilize. thus becoming
again invisible.-New York Journal.
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1916-12-02
pIsra.,l and the Editor.

Disraeli would dearly have liked to
suspend the London Globe years ago
when that paper. then Wing organ.
fell foul Of him over his ''vindication
Of the English Constitution" Few edi.
tors have ever been 20 roughly abused
AZ in Disraeli's letter to the Times: ut
ID not my passion for notoriety that
has induced me to tweak the editor Of
the Globe by the nose and to infiict
sundry kicks upon the baser part Of
his base body. to make him eat dirt
and his own words. fouler than any
Hlth. but because wished to show to
the world what miserable poltroon.
what a craven dullard. what a literary
scarecrow. what q mere thing. stuffed
with straw and rubbish. Is the soidisant
director Of public opinion and ohicial
organ of Wing politics. London Opin-
ion.
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1916-12-02
scientist who Couldn't Light . Fire

Lord Kelvin. like Lord Morley. ones
amused Scottish audience with a dis
play Of ignorance At lecture in Ed
inburgh. with Lord Kelvin In the chair.
the Duke of Argyll was taken sudden
~ III. when the aged peer was car.
ried down to one of the anterooms."
said local paper. zone Of the first
things TO be thought Of was the light
Ing Of fire. and this task was tackled
BY the dukes host. Lord. Kelvin. But
instead Of placing some paper in the
CRATE and some wood on that In the
orthodox manner. he amazed the on
lockers by desperate efforts to kindle
a handful OF sticks at gas burner
Ordinary mortals may be pardoned for
taking some satisfaction in the fact
that eren SO great n philosopher az
Lord Kelvin did not know how to
light FIRE"
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1916-12-02
ED WAS uN1RyTAFuL.
Mark Twain First Proved It and Then
Dragged About Il

Dragged About II
Sam Clemens read more than any one
guessed. At night. propped up in bed
"a habit continued until his death-ne
was likely to read until late hour.
He enjoyed smoking at such times and
had made himself pipe with large
bowl which stood on the door and had
4 long rubber stem, something like the
TrAish hubble bubble. He liked to
ill the big bowl and smoke at ease
through the entire evening. But some
times the pipe went out, which meant
that he must strike q match and lean
far over to apply 1t, just when ae was
most comfortable. Sam Clemens never
liked unnecessary exertion. One night
when the pipe had gone out for the
second time he happened to hear the
young book clerk, Brownell, passing
up to his room on the top floor. Sam
called to him.
ED, come here!"
Brownell poked his head In the door.
The two were great chums.
What will you have. SamT he
asked.
Come in, Ed. Henry's asleep, and
I'm in trouble. want somebody to
light my pipe"
why don't you light 1t yourselfT
Brownen asked.
II would, only knew you'd be along
in d few minutes and would do 1t for
me-"
Brownell scratched a match. stopped
down and applied 1t.
what are you reading. SamT
"Oh, nothing much--a 80 called funny
book. One of these days I'll write .
funnier book myself"
Brownell laughed.
"No. you won't, SAM" he said. you
are too lazy ever to write book"
Years later, in the course Of a lecture
which he delivered in Keokuk. Mark
Twain said that he supposed the most
untruthful man In the world lived
right there in Keokuk and that his
name was Ed Brownell.-Albert Bige-
low Paine in St. Nicholas.
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1916-12-02

The New York Giants were exercis-
Ar In Texas one night when Mike Don
lin crept into the Pullman that was
sidetracked ut Waco long while after
hours. greatly to the rage Of John J.
McGrnw. Now. according to Donlin.
there is supposed to be but one com
plete humiliation for n ball player who
goes against the winter training rules.
The culprit is assigned to an upper
berth in the sleeper.
McGraw was awakened when the be-
lated Donlin climbed into the car. and
says he. Just for that. Mike. you take
an upper"
The manager had forgotten the play
er's previous servitudes and stealths in
the way of personal transportation
across the country. But Mike had not
forgotten. He said merrily: "All right.
John. I've ridden 'em higher than up
pers and lower tlnn lowers. Chicago
News.
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1916-12-02
HIGH COST OF LIVING.
Thines That. Are Mere Comforts Now
Used to BE Luxuries.


Used to Be Luxuries.
No economist has put enough empha-
sis OH the fact that II the cost OF living
is higher now 1t IL to large extent
because the average man Ii demanding
more comforts and lpxuries, and these
must cost more. Before the days Of
plumbing and bathrooms the workman
missed some onerous bills, but he ia
not ready to throw the plumbing out
of the house.
OIL Is cheaper for light than electric.
ity. but people pay more for modern
light because they want the better
service even at the higher prices.
workmen by the thousands have phon.
ographs. form Of entertainment un-
known until very few years ago.
Even street cars are rnther new
thing. and the poorest families spend
many dollars every year for this serv-
Ice, which has become indispensable.
Magazines are purchased now by many
people who. ten years ago hud never
subscribed for such publication.
Thousands Of articles are for sale In
every department store. of which IL
lnrge percentage are purchased ut some
time or other by the average wage
earning family.
Modern living does cost more as
suredly. but 1t also yields more.-Mil-
waukee Journal.
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1916-12-02
GET RICH QUICK SCHEMES.
For Big Investors They May Work. but
Net For Small onss.

For Bio Investors Thoy Way Wofks DIV
Net For Small onss.
Those who labor hard for theii
money and who have still more ardu-
Gus struggle in saving small sums"
says banker in the American Maya.
zine. NATURALLY fall easy victims in
many instances to the desire for sud
den riches. But the fatal error lies In
supposing that the person Of small
means can afford to take the chance.
IL be or she loses they lose all. Tho
large capitalist and the professional
money lender have the law Of averages
working with them. They can afford
to sink money into twenty ventures .
they make a thousand per cent on ont.
They are protected by the law OF
chance. the average safety Of their in
vestments depending upon no single
risk.
"3tsk IL a necessary part Of bust
ness, but should be borne BY the strong.
never by the weak. The promoter who
talks about the small investor being
given the same opportunities as the
very rich Is INDUCING in bunk he
always forgets to say that q safe D
per cent bond or q 8 per cent mort
gage, cold. impersopal repositories for
funds will at the end Of i've years
have paid their owners 50 per cent to
35 per cent ALLOWING for compound in
terestD and that the vast majority OF
new ventures with big promises will
have paid nothing.
"Only the man who can AFFORD to
take risks has any business to look for
an investment that will mako him rich
ouickly,"
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1916-12-02
Kick Of the Gun.

When young American Joins tho
national guard OF, following that In
stinct which not even long city life
can entirely kill. takes q gun and
starts out as a hunter. one Of the ear.
Hest surprises he gets IL that nasty
hard kick his 1rearm gives him.
But the kick of the big guns in war
- tremendous. Some of the guns Jump
into the air. In others mechanism
takes up the rebound and the gun
slides back into place.
1t is curious fact that each Of these
great guns takes its kick in q way all
its own.-New York World.
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1916-12-02
From the Shin. We'll,

An old indy ON board vessel OBJ
served two sailors pumping up water
to wash the decks. and. the captain
being near. she accosted him as fol-
lows:
well. captain. 10 you've got a well
aboard. eh?"
"Yes, ma'am: always carry one" said
the polite captain.
well, that's clever. It's SO much
better than the nasty sea winter. which
I always dislike so."-St Louis Globe
Democrat
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1916-12-02
Looking Back.

This car of yours seems to give you
great pleasure"
.Yes often wonder how I ever
got along without it." answered the
motorist ioftily. walking tires me
dreadfuIly and Is-er-somewhat pie
beian."
Pardon me for reminding you Of the
painful past. but I happen to know that
you used to cover considerable terri
tory as a mere estrian."-Birming-
ham Age Hernld.
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1916-12-02
sA11LEp FOR THEIR BRIDES.
The Nest Thrilling Wedding Day 4"
the Worlds History.

the Worlds History.
Do YOU know what was the most
thrilling wedding day In the history
of the world7 There have been many
romantic marriages and many nuptia'
services that had to b deferred BE-
cause of the opposition Of parent or
rival, but all Of them pale into dinRy
gray when compared with the colorful
spectacle Of the abduction and recap
turs Of the Venetian brides in the early
winter of 023. when Candino H., the
noble doge. was lending bis presence
to the biggest wedding party in the
history of the Church Of San Pietro
It had long been the custom for all the
noble brides TO be married on, St Ma.
rvs day. It was. moreover. the Gus
tom for the brides to bring with them
all their Jewels and their dowries. in
gold coin. inclosed in handsomely carv-
ed chests.
The latter fact was well k1\Cn in
Trieste, that ancient Roman 2ony,
which was the harbor for bands Of pi-
rates who were most clever navigators.
On this richest of all st. Mary's wed
ding days the ceremony for moro than
a score Of brides had already begun
when the pirates from Trieste burst
into the church. captured the brides
and their dowries and carried them
to the waiting boats. Thanks to the
Trunkmakers' union. there were sew
erai boats waiting, and in these the b.
reft bridegrooms and the sturdy trunf-
makers gave pursuit There was .
battle royal. one Of the most thrilling
sea fights ON record. dowries ana
brides were recovered. and before mid
night all had been safely married.--
st, Louis Globe Democrat
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1916-12-02

We have had excellent morals drawn
from the substantial waist Of the We
nus OF Milo for the admonition of the
fashionable woman. hut what can we
say about the Duchess de Mazarin.
who &c. Duvnl tells us in shadows of
Old Paris, died In ITS from tight
facing. although she had posed for n
statue Of Venus?''
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1916-12-02
WHEN AsE YOU GOING TO opxNT

drink. This they did and continued
to do for the next hour or so.
Then they became aware that for
some time there had been several peo-
pie knocking urgently at the door. For
a time they ignored the noise, but the
knocking became so insistent that At
last they went to see what was the
matter.
when are We going to open this pub
lie 'ousey" demanded husky voice
from outside.
"Open it? What for?" replied the
sailors. "'Ec've bought this ere place
for ourselves. ''-LondOn Answers.
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1916-12-02

The number Of plants used for medic.
inal purposes In the Philippines IL very
large. A few are recognized as sources
Of standard medicines. but the number
having commercial value il decidedly
small. From one. the St Ignatius
bean (Strychnos ignatii). the strychnine
of commerce Il extracted.
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1916-12-02
Meswjne's Gun,

Mcswine's gun is prodigious cav
ity in the cliffs on the coast Of County
Donegal, Ireland. into which the tide
PUSHES with such force As to produce
sound like the booming Of a cannon,
which can be beard twenty or thirty
miles away.
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1916-12-02

-Your pa promised to give q dowry
of 20, 900 marks When ID he going to
pay?'
well. II be promised 10000 marks
he meant 1900. and you ought not to
insist on such a trifiing sumr'-Meg-
Rendorfer Blaetter
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1916-12-02
Witty.

The following epigram was written
on DR.. Isaac Letsom, a once well
known English physician:
When folks are sick and send for me
purges, bleeds and sweats EN-.
II after that they choose to die
What's that to me? ] Letsom.
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1916-12-02
Exactly So.

.Tbe doctor knows hste camphor."
500"
"Yet first he made me sni6 It. and
now he has prescribed 1t as a iini.
ment.''
Il call that rubbing 1t h."-Kansas
City Journal.
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1916-12-02

Her Father-The fact Is. I cannot
give my daughter dowry just at pres
emit Suitor-Thats all right, SIR.
can love her for herself alone in the
meantime.-Boston Transcript.
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1916-12-02

The best way to live is to cast away
troubles and contentious. which cannot
be cured by frettlng.
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1916-12-02

II thou art man admire those who
attempt great enterprises. even though
they faii.-Seneca.
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1916-12-02
A WiM Life.

The great guiding marks of wise
life are indeed few and simple-to do
our duty, to avoid useless sorrow and
to acquiesce patiently in the inevitable.
w, Lecky.
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1916-12-02

We only see In 4 lifetime Q doeen
faces marked with the peace Of q Coz
tented spirit.-Beecher.
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1916-12-02

Two sailors. retiring from the sea. in.
vested their joint savings In = country
Inn.
On. rising on the hrst morning of
their ownership, one suggested they
should go into the bar and have q
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1916-12-02
cenbinatisn ,sp>Msa.

combinakisR .epeAsd.
He-She married fool with barrels
Of money. she-Then why isn't she
happy? He-Mariage brought him to
his senses.-Boston Transcript.
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1916-12-02

saluted by his mother-in-law and every
one else as Sir James. When the first
excitement attending the couples re-
turn had worn of Chenoworth was in
formed Of what had been going on
during his courtship.
Mrs. Smithson had inherited her es-
tate through the female branch Of
Chenoworths. She was aware that
the heir to the title had two centuries
before disappeared in America. On
receipt OF a copy of Chenoworth's frag.
ment she had taken 1t to a herald Of
flee in London. and they had given her
the following reading Of 1t when COM
plete:
AT the beginning Of the parliamen-
tary wars James Chenoworth. son and
heir Of Sir Ralph Chenoworth. went
sut to fight for the king. His brother.
Arthur. Two years his Junior. Joined
the parliamentary forces. The two
brothers were enough alike to be twins.
At the end of the war. the kings cause
having been lost, James Chenoworth
went to America. Arthur returned to
his home and succeeded to the title.
When the restoration came James
Chcnoworth had died. leaving son.
John, The sons of James Cheno-
worth are the rIghtful heirs to the
Chenoworth title and estates"
Mrs. Smithson's action was explain
ed. BY taking James Chenoworth for
a son-in-aw she revived the baronetcy
and secured for her daughter the e.
tates which were legally his.
The Bridgeport evening farmer., 1916-09-27
OBITUARY.
DAVID F. DONOVAN.

With tRe impressive service of sol emn high mass of requiem in Sacred Heart church today, funeral services for David F. Donovan. late steward of the Elks- club, were held today. Hun- dreds of relatives and friends includ- ing several hundred members of Bridgeport lodge. No. 36, B. P. O. E., filled the church. A delegation was present from Franklin Bartlett camp, No. II, Sons of Veterans, of which the deceased was also a member. Many beautiful floral tributes were banked about the. bier.
 There were few dry eyes in the church, when after the solemn music which preceded the opening of the mass, the priests began their chant. Rev. Charles F; Farley, of Rennsse- laer, N. r., cousin of the deceased, was ceiebrant of the mass. Rev. Thomas J. Mooney was deacon and Rev. John J. Keane sub-deacon. Rev, pr. Richard F. Moore was master of ceremonies.
 Theresa O'Brien, Katherine Lom- bard, William Chew and Prof. Herr mann sang Schmidt's requiem mass. At the offertory Miss Lombard sang Ave Maria" After mass Loren Del bridge sang Face to Face" AS the body was borne from the church Will liam Chew sang Beautiful Land on High" The bearers were close per- sonal friends of the deceased and all members of the Elks- They were
The Bridgeport evening farmer., 1916-09-27

of trust he occupied in the Burr & Knapp matter comes as a great sur prise to his many friends and the public here. tr
 Attorney Chamberlain Is one of the best known of Connecticut lawyers. He is a native of Bridgeport, a Yale graduate, '72,and a law graduate from Ann Arbor Law school. He studied law in York Pa., law offices. and was admitted to the bar in Minnesota, In 1874, and the Connecticut bar in 1878, He was clerk of the Bridge port city court in 1877 and 1878, and for 15 years, after that time, the pros ecuting attorney of that tribunal. lie also has been county health officer.
 He has been active in Republican politics, and several years ago when Clifford B. Wilson finally was first nominated, he was talked of for the nomination.
The Bridgeport evening farmer., 1916-09-27
Room size rugs of small cost.

A handsome Administer rug without a seam, is but $25.
 It's a rug fitted for use in great majority of homes.
 Colors are good, patterns are tasteful, effect is that rich lustrous one character istic of good Administer rugs.
 Gay lowered patterns for rooms that need brighten ing, quiet Oriental designs for rooms that require soft tones,-9 by 12 feet $25.
 Tapestry Brussels rugs for rooms where wear is greater than ordinary. Have hard surface, are not difficult to sweep, stand up well under the tread of many feet.
 Oriental and small flower ed patterns, 9 by 12 feet, $15.
 Paneled rugs of heavy tex ture are Administers too. Their paneled design makes them add to apparent size of room in which they are used. And they give added dignity to other fittings of a room too. g by F feet-$15.
 Art rugs for use in sleep ing rooms.' Supple of weave, soft yet firm, much like the solid long-wearing ingrain carpets of times gone by. Blues thns and green;-9 by 1O1a feet, $9; 9 to 12 feet, $1O.5O.
 !. Third floor
The Bridgeport evening farmer., 1916-09-27
PATRICK FITZPATRICK

Patrick Fitzpatrick. former sexton of St. Charles church died at his home. 552 East Main street. yesterday aged 52 years. He was a native of Waterbury but had resided here many years. When Rev. W. H. Murphy be- came acting pastor of St. Mary's church in 1900 he brought MT. Fi:z- patrick to this city to be sexton. MT. Fitzpatrick had been sexton of a church in Waterbury wheres Father Murphy was assigned before comtng here. When St. Charles, parish was organized MT. Fitzpatrick became sex ton of that church but shortly after 1t was completed he resigned and forsa a time worked in a factorN His widow and one sen, Frank survive him, ALSO "a brother and five sisters h Water bury,