Norwich bulletin., 1916-11-14
WILD ALARMS

Aren't you wAllq inquired the Woodlawn man of his friend from Hyde Park when the latter had board ed the suburban train.
 The Hyde Park man turned on him dark and hollow gaze. How can man be well.'' he demanded, "a per fectly respectable. quiet man. with no taste at all for mathematics. when his entire cosmos is tangled and upset through being turned into a combina- ton policeman, detective and trained nurse? It doesn't agree with my sys- teml
 tTd have you know that we have able company the last week. lmo- gene's old school friend Daisy. on her way west, has been visiting us. Ever since we were married l have been hearing about Daisy. She is the only one of the crowd who picked out a rich man to marry and the rest Of the graduating class who slipped up and got only ordinary providers have had to snatch their luxury second hand. hearing about Daisy's motors and mansions and diamonds and poodles and Newport clothes.
 'iSo you can imagine the mad ex- citement when Imogene heard that Daisy was condescending to visit us in our humble $100 month flat l had difficulty in restraining Imogene's hospitable efforts from the start. We were not, pointed out, entertalnlng royalty, so it really was unnecessary to purchase new oriental rugs all through, completely redecorate and have a $1,000 bedroom set sent up on approval to be returned when the visit was accomplished.
 "No, I told Imogene, let Daisy take us as we are and enjoy the novelty of life on merely three square meals day and a roof that kept off the rain. Let her get a taste of hardship and have to stick in her own hairpins and put on her own pumps and see how the submerged tenth really do ex- iSt.
 "She had probably left the comforts of the far east with the idea of brav- ing dangers anyhow, and it would be a development for her soul. What hadn't counted on were Daisy's jewels.
 "Imogene pointed them out to me enthusiastically the first night at din- ner though it really was an unnec- essary act, as my eye sight is good. At a snap estimate I should say that Daisy wore on her fingers the biggest pearls in captivity, assisted by the largest diamonds working, and was trimmed around the outskirts with a
 
 culable value.
 '1 murmured something about our very good wall safe and then Daisy spoke languidly. She said she never used wall safe since the time their butler had dynamited theirs. and any how there was no sense bothering over her few poor little trinkets. She just kept them in channels bag, which she would hide safely. Nothing that l could say would make that woman budge from her stand, and l dozed very lightly in consequence.
 T fell asleep toward morning and was reused by Imogene's wild shrfeks. She said that Daisy's jewels were gone and she had locked the cook up in her room and to come quick Daisy in a lacy negngee, was frantically paving up her room sobbing that she had put the bag behind the picture of Joan of Arc, and now it was gone, and the stock market was so nervous that Paul never, never, would, consent to buying any more jewelry, and, oh, her head was splittingt We'll, found the chamois bag pinned to the inside of the window curtain drapery and then Daisy remembered it was in the last hotel where she stoped that she had hidden the bag behin a pie ture.
 Of course the cook left, and now adays, you know, there aren't any cooks, so 1mogene had to get the meals and I wiped the dishes, because you can't ask Newport lady to han dle a dish hMtowel-mercy, no!
 The next~tine it happened Imogene called me up at the office She and Daisy were lunching downtown and in the middle of the jellied salmon Daisy had turned sea green, shrieked and fainted away. She explained on re- covering consciousness that she had just discovered the absence Of the chamois bag from the spot where she had arranged it on her person and t; please send for the detectives!
 'We had a conference between the hotel managers, the chief of detectives and some satellites and started an in- vestigation that would have done credit to unearthing' g. blackhand out rage. It was rough on me when the next day I had to block the wheels o1 justice by relating that Daisy ha6 found the chamois bag in the laundry