The Richfield recorder. (Richfield, Idaho) 1909-1931, 1916-11-03
FINNEGAN'S PHILOSOPHY
On the Merry-Go-Roun

Faith an now Wilson's for pro
lection. -Four year agone he was agir
1t, for it was agln the constychooshun
Now that he is for 1t, that immortal
Instrument has also changed lis
mind He makes me head shwim.
But I've good company. Bryan an
Garrison, the civil service Dimycrats
and the rale Dimycrats the Passyfists
an the vulgar sowls that's none Too
Proud to Fight'-they've all been on
the Merry go-round. Some iv thin
turned sick.
"'God bless ye-ye're a good man
but We make me dizzy says Bryan,
leppn' from the Hobby Horse and run
min for the woods. I've q ginywne
raygrit at losn' We says Wudthrow
THROWN him Cocked-IIat iv the vim
tage of 1909.
"'Here's the Army BILL says Garri-
son. How does it suity he axes,
"'Fine,' says Wudthrow, 'barrin' a
few changes YEN redraw it, he
says, 'to provide says he, 'voun-
tary universal service in a Federal
Milishy,' says he, controlled be the
states says he; AN recruited be
spiritual com-pulsion,' says he. 1T
shud be nayther too large nor too
small says he; 'or maybe both he
says; AN the ammynition,' says he,
must be nayther too much nor too
little says he. I've to see Hay. be-
fo,-,, doo;do +bo dovto1oc fo, ,fic M
jooty to kape an open mind says
Wudthrow.
stop the music and lave me off,
says Garrison. Are We crazy or am
l.? Garrison means, layin' on his back
an gain wildly at tn sky. God bless
ye. says Wudthrow I've near-real
raygrit at losin' YOU he says And as
Garrison beats it to Jarsey the Merry
Go-Round plays a side step.
"'F'what iv the Navy?' says Kitchin
TT shud be thruly adequate ivry-
where says the Great Idaylist, 'ex-
cept in Montany, where we need no
Navy says he, and in st. Louey,
where 1t shud be the biggest In the
world. Well be none exthravagant
like thin Republicans, says he, so
here's the Dimycrat bill yell pass
says he.
But this same is the Raypubli-
cans BILL says Kitchin starin'. Yen
go an pass it, says Wudthrow, pound
ing the desk. 'Hooray,' says the black
Republicans votin' for the bill. DO
l dream, says Kitchin. If I liver
drank, I'd t'ink l was boozed,' says
Kitchin in a thremblin' vice. And he
falls off,
GLOW about the Army bill?' axes
Hay.
Thorough an instant preparation
for definse must he the wurd,' says
Wudthrow, wild heroic ris'lution in his
eye.
4 have here BILL says Hay, pro
vidin for an increase iv five hundther
men a year for twinty year. he says;
AN amynishun for six hours ackshun.'
he says, twill make us safe from
Madagascar, measles. muckrakin'.
milIt-rism and marital infdelity.' he
says, AN well catch Willy before he
dies av he doan't die before we catch
him. says Hay.
Embrace me- says Wilson. oh
Hay-afther all preparedness is q
matther iv the heart an not of guns
or forts. Did Cleveland ivir give We
a job? he axes, stoppin' short like.
"Divil a wan.' says Hay Thin,
says Wudthrow shakin' the both iv
Hays hands cordial like, for yer patri- |
otto service in so bravely sipportin'
me policies he says, in all their
phrases he says, I make judge iv
ye'he,' says he, as well as yer frind |
that We put in the JOKER says the |
Prisidint. 'Howly Saints says the
Sinitors.
"'Phwhat does this mean at all
Mt ALL? they axes. I've the wan
thrack mind says the President, AN
re go all through me train iv thought
before We come to the pork car, says
he. Are We on?' axes the Apostle "
Common Counsels.
"'We're on says the Sinitors, fall
ng off. An the Merry Co Round plays
1 Wilson Waltz, (Which We know
lawn, is wan step forward. two steps
pack, hesitate an sidestep). An Tu-
nulty goes out to spread the glad
idin's that the preparation prade will
)e led be the Presidint in person.
How does he save his face?" asked
ovid his mouth" responded Finne-
yan dryly.