The Tabor independent. [volume] (Tabor, S.D.) 1913-19??, 1916-05-04
WHO IS PRESIDENT
OF SWITZERLAND2
Albert Bigelow Paine in Harper's Maya
zine

Albert Bigelow Paine in Harper's Maya
zine.
Switzerland is a republic that runs
with the exactness OF a Swiss watch,
its machinery as Theoretically con-
cealed. l had heard that the Swiss re-
public set the pattern Of government
for the world, and 1 was anxious to
know something of it's methods and
personnel l was sorry that l was so
Ignorant. l didn't even know the name
of the Swiss president, and for a week
was ashamed to confess it. 1 was hop
ing might see 1t in one of the French
papers l puzzled over every evening.
But at the emo Of the week 1 timidly
and apologetiCally inquired of our
friendly landlord as to the name of
the Swiss president.
But then came a shock. Our landlord
grew confused, blushed, and confessed
that he didn't know 1t, either! He had
known it, he said of course, but it had
slipped his mind. Slipped his mind!
Think Of the name Of Roosevelt or Will
son or Taft slipping the mind of any
body in America-and a landlord!
asked the man who sold me cigars. He
had forgotten, too. | asked the apothe-
cary, but got no information. l was
not so timid after that. ! asked a fell
low pasSenger-guest, l mean-an
American, but of long Swiss residence
and got this story. l believe most of
it. He said:
When l came to Switzerland and
found out what a wonderful little coun-
try 1t was, its government so econom-
iCal, so free from party corruption and
spoils, from graft and politics, so diff
ferGnt from the home life Of our own
dear Columbia, l thought: The man
at the head of this thing must be a
master hand; I'll find out his name So
picked out a bright looking subject,
and asked, What Is the name Of the
Swiss PRESIDENT
He tried to pretend he didn't under
stand my French, but he did, for l can
tear the language off all right-learned
it studying art in Paris. When pinned
him down he said he knew the name
we'll enough, parfaitement, but couldn't
think Of it at that moment
That was a surprise, but asked the
next man. He couldn't think Of it
either. Then l asked a police officer.
OF course he knew 1t all right: oh, our,
certainment, mails; then he scratched
his head and scowled, but he couldn't
dig up that name. He was just plain
liar-tout simplement-like the others
/ asked every man met, but somehow
it seemed to stick there. Not a man in
VeVey or MOntreuX could tell me the
name Of the Swiss president. 1t was
the same in FribOurg, the same even
in Berne, the capital. had about Civ
en- it up when one evening there in
Berne l noticed a sturdy man with an
honest face approaching. He looked
intelligent, too, and as a last resort
asked, Cold you, by any chance, tell
me the name OF the Swiss president?
The effect was startling. He seized
me by the arm and, after looking up
and down the street leaned forward
and whispered in my ear:
Mon Dieu! c'est MOL l am the
Swiss president; but-ah, non, don't
tell any one. l am the only man in
Switzerland who knows it,"
You see," my friend continued "he
is elected privately; no torchlight cam
paigns, no scandal, and only for year
He is only a sort of chairman
though, of course, his work is impor-
tant, and the present able incumbent
has been elected a number Of times.
His name is-is-is- All, yes, that's
my tram. so sorry to have to hurry
away-see you tonight at dinner"