Daily capital journal. (Salem, Oregon) 1903-1919, 1916-04-29

l0clllLleS are untepdlreu' sugS me- VI
words to that effect And hate says
he, to see fools trying to run the
world
81 never touch drop, says l, and
there are many kinds Of fools, and the
world runs on its own apex, accord
ing TO science, with no meddllng from
me-
~ was referring, says he, to the
president of this republic His country
is In a desperate condition. Its treas
ury is empty, it's on the verge Of war
with Ncamala, and il it wasn't for
the hot weather the people would be
starting revolutions In every town.
Here Is a nation goes on Wainwright,
on the brink Of destruction. A man
Of intelligence could rescue it from its
impending doom In one day by issuing
the necessary edicts and orders. Pres
dent Gomez knows nothing Of states
manship or policy DO you know Adam
Smith,
"Iemme see,' says ]. There was a
one cared man named Smith in Fort
Worth, Tex, but think his first name
was
az am referring to the political econ
omist, says Wainwright
Smother Smith, them says l.
The one | speak of never was ar.
rested
80 Wainwright boils some more
with Indignation at the lnsensiblllty Of
people who are not corpulent to fill
public positions, and then he tells me he
Is going out to the presidents summer
palace, which is four miles from Aguas
Frescas, to instruct him in the art Of
running steam heated republics.
"'Come along with me- Trotter,
says he, and I'll show you what brains
can do
"Anything IN it, / asks.
"'The satisfaction says he, of re-
deeming a country of 100000 popula-
ton from ruin back to prosperity and
peace.
"Greatp says 1. 1'll go with you.
I'd prefer to eat a live broiled lobster
just now, but give me liberty as second
choice IL | can't be in at the death
Wainwright and me permeates
through the town, and he hats at a
rum dlspensary.
Have you any money! he asks.
"I have, says l. fishing out my sill
yer dollar 4 always go about with
adequate sums Of money
""Then wen drink, says Vain
wright.
"'Not me, says l. Not any demon
rum or any Of It's ramIicatlons foI
mine. It's one Of my non-wcaknesses.'
cts my falling says he. Whats
your particular soft pointY
industry says promptly, I'm
hardworklng, dlligent, industrious and
energetic
"My dear Mr.. Trotter says he
surely I've known you long enough tC
tell you you are liar. Every mar
must have his own particular weakness:
and his own particular strength in 9th
er things. Now you will buy me &
drink Of rum, ana we win call on Presl
dent Gomez
"Well, sir" Trott0r went ON, "wC
walks the four miles out, through {
virgin conservatory Of palms and fern'
and other roof garden products, to tn,
presidents summer White House,
was blue ana reminded you Of wha
YOU see ON the stage In the third act
which they describe as same ~ thu
first on the programs.
"There was more than fifty peopl
waiting outside the iron fence that sur
rounded the house and grounds, Their
was generals, agitators and epergne
In gold lace uniforms and citizen
In diamonds and panama hats, al
waiting to get an audience with the roy
al five card draw. And In kind OF
summer house in front Of the mansion
we could see burned sienna man eat
Ing breakfast out Of gold dishes an
taking his time judged that tn
crowd outside had come out for thel
morning orders and requests and wa
afraid to lntrude
But G. Wainwright wasn't. tn
gate was open, and he walked insld
and up TO the presidents table as cont
dent as man who knows the hea
waiter In fifteen cent restauran
And | went with him because | ha
only 70 cents, and there was nothin
else 10 do
The Gomez man rises from his cha
and looks, colOred man as he was, lik
he was about to call out for corporal {
the guard, post No. l. But Wainwrigl
says some phrases to him In peculia
ly mbrlcatlng manner and the fir
thing you know we was all three of |
seated at the table, with coffee an
/ rolls and igunna outlets coming as f0i
+ as about ninety poems could rustic 'er
, "And then Wainwright begins
talk, but the president interrupts him
? "'You Yankees, says he, polite, "a
suredly take the cake for assurance,
assure you or words TO that etfec
He spoke English better than you {
, me. You've had long walk say
he, but it's nicer In the cool mornlu
to walk than to ride. May ! sugge'
some refreshmentsy says he.
, "'Rum, says Wainwright
; "Glmme a cigar, says |.