The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1916-03-23
Confessions ofaWlfe

OF Them Without that prefix.
never thought OF Eleanor Fairiow
without the word fascinating"
bobbing up and settling itself be.
fore her name. always think OF
Eliene ss sweet" of MoiIie as
charming" Of Donna Tenney as
brilliant" Of Annie as sensible"
Of Jim as -faithful." OF Pat as pa.
tlent." OF Mary ms true blue and
OF liili Tenncy as tickle"
Sometimes change some OF
these adlcciives. but IN my mind
all my friends aud Hcquainsances
arc card.indexed with a word or
two that simply describes them 10
me. Dick. In tho frat years OF our
marriage. was dearest" then he
became ''thoughtiess. Fur time
! nsver spoke 10 him--never called
his name--that tho word cruel
did not come into my mind. and
mako me shudder for months when
ever my lips framed HIS name. Yet
such II tho queer oairk Of a won.
ans love. There. I have written
the word love-" but am not sure
that love Dick any more. at least
] am very sure do not lore him
In tho way that I used TO do. I
never think OF him now that tho
words Poor old Dick" do not end
with n Sigh.
Poor old Dick He certainly has
grown old. and. while perhaps bis
friends are congratulatiug him on
bis better financial success. he liz
poor. Already his hair has begun
10 whlten Mt the temples. When |
noticed II the other day really
think II hurt mo more to think
that ] did not want to run my fin.
gers thru II and kiss the gray locks
any more. All II meant TO me was
poor old Dick.
In one OF John Caiswor,hy's
books. h. remarks Of woman OF
the streets. She expected 10 find
the Joy OF life. and instead nhe
only found the life OF Joy. which Is
n very different thing think
men can find out this IL SO as well
as women. | know that Dick has
done so.
For him as well as for mo illu.
sion has fled. ! am satisfied he
hlames himself for Eleanor Fair.
lows death and my dreary outlook
on life. lie has plunged into work.
and. like many another man. ho Is
trying 10 forget his follies Ia the
fever and stress OF business,
Just now. he Is doing penance as
vigorously as flagcllant. and.
while his outside garments are In
the latest and smartest fashion.
yet his soul In feeling the rough
CALLING of q fabric that hurts more
than sackcloth does the flesh. and
his heart. instead Of his head, is
covered with the ashes of lost de.
sire. Poor old Dick. / want TO be
your friend. and yet all desire to
be your sweetheart and your wife
has fled
Poor old Dick, | am really sor-
rier for you than for myself. for
you have to fight two devils. Re-
morse and Regret. and I have only |
one. only regret that | married |
you without knowing more about |
your life and your loves.
And yet--oh. little book, II In
so hard to he honest with oneself. |
| was Just about to put down hero |
that II had known about Eleanor |
Fairlow ! never would have mar. |
ried Dick. but even as my pen was
poised TO write the words | knew |
I was lying to myself. know that |
| would have married him had all |
the women In the world stood in
line and said that no belonged to
each one OF them.
Oh. little book. those early days
of living and loving were glorious
beyond belief.
Time. place or circumstance can.
not take them from me.
Ito be contInued)