davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Tombstone epitaph. (Tombstone, Ariz.) 1887-current, 1916-04-16

quiring three columns of bright. spicy.
interesting. crisp short paragraphs to
be telegraphed before eleven O'Clock
that night. They were to relate to
public events and public men and ev.
cry line must be printed whether good.
bad or Indifferent. And this. not for
one day. but for every day.
1T is no use to say in the face OF
such an order. IL you only had twenty.
four hours notice it might be well
done. The only question was what
could be done and how well could Il
be done before eleven o'clock that
night The paper came to Washing.
ton the next day with four columns OF
the most interesting novelettes about
president. members Of his cabinet, SEN
ators, congressman. bureau officials:
in fact everybody In official life con-
tributed to the humor of those col.
umns. The grave chief Justice OF the
United States, and the ponderous ex.
ecutive were credited with saying the
cleyerest things-I say credited. be-
cause all the stories, all the jokes
were either pure invention or vital.
lied chestnuts.
Now let me take you into my con-
tidence since you would all Ike TO
know the secret OF journalistic intel.
Iectual force Probably not one In
hundred OF the bright things you read
in the papers were ever said by the
persons to whom they are attributed.
In the days of President Lincoln ev'
cry story cxtant had him for q father.
The journalist Of today knows very
well the way to float witty saying 10
to put it upon one In public LIE. In
our day Senator Evarts has the credtt
OF saving more bright, clever things
than anybody else. And why! 30
cause he really has told. very frequent
Iv too. witty stories. For that reason
when a newspaper man invents any
thing particularly good and wants
sponsor he puts it on Evarts.
You may remember early in the
first session of the Fifty-hrst congress
the Democrats evaded the roll call Tor
weeks in succession Whenever the
ayes and noes were called they left
the nail IN q DOuy. just eASh eAS oA'kkS
was very common in our midst and
one morning there appeared the fot
lowing. Senator Evarts remarked to
his colleague. Edmunds. that II rum
ming from the eyes and nose was .
sure symptom OF the grippe then ev-
ery Democratic member In the house
must be sadly afflicted for they had
been running from the ayes and noes
for more than two weeks past
IF you were to ask Senator Evarts
IL he made such q remark he would
doubtless tell you. IL you read 1t in
the newspaper 1t must be true But
the trouble about such humor Ii, the
newspaper where 1t originates never
gets credit for 1t. Not long ago tbs
size Of the postage stamp was reduced.
Again Senator Evarts came to the
front. He said-in the newspaper
'Edmunds, do you know that Vans
maker has endeared himself to the
rising generation OF Young America!
That profound lawyer from Vermont
could not answer the conundrum. and
so Senator Evarts answered. Because
the postmaster general by reducing
the size OF the postage stamp. has
diminished the licking propensity q
the adult population of the country"
Tombstone epitaph. (Tombstone, Ariz.) 1887-current, 1916-04-16
Get lneubators In Shape.

The incubators should be at work
now. II not started, clean them up.
I'LL the lamps, put in new. clean wicks
and light up. Run them at least Sc to
IS hours to test thermostats and reg
ulators. Be gathering good eggs. and
start your early hatch as soon as pos
sible. Time runs around wonderfully
fast. and there's no Matching time like
the present.
Tombstone epitaph. (Tombstone, Ariz.) 1887-current, 1916-04-16
Glover 10 Excellent Feed.

Clover in the form OF hay makes
such excellent feed that no dairyman
is justified in giving clover silo space
In preference to corn.
Tombstone epitaph. (Tombstone, Ariz.) 1887-current, 1916-04-16
Safety First With Bulls.

Every few weeks somebody gets
hurt by an ugly bull who is long on
horns and short on politeness. Saw
'em off quick. Better be safe than
sorry.
Tombstone epitaph. (Tombstone, Ariz.) 1887-current, 1916-04-16
Buy Pure-ered Mares.

II you cannot afford to buy pure
bred mares at the start. buy the best
you can. then trade and buy until you
can get the real article.
Tombstone epitaph. (Tombstone, Ariz.) 1887-current, 1916-04-16
exeeIIen. Winter Poultry Feed.

Excellent Winter Poultry Feed.
Cabbages are an excellent winter
feed for poultry. The less salable
heads should be pitted in the field to
protect from severe freezing and used
for chicken feed.
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1916-09-08
WEST SHORE NEWS
WORK TORASE
CHOIR STANDARD
harrisburg and West Shore
People Combine to Improve
Singing in Churches

Lemoyne. Pa, Sept. s.-"To lift up the
standard of the singing of choirs along
the West Shore and in small towns OF
Cumberland and Dauphin counties Is
the slogan under which eight persons
from the West Shore and Harrisburg
will work during campaign in the diff
ferent churches this winter. The MEM
bers of the octet all of whom have
been recognized in local talent plays
along the West Shore, plan to visit the
churches of the entire community. give
a recital and then organize choir.
The first recital will be given m the
Penbrook United Brethren Church sun
day evening, September 10.
Those composing the octet are: So
pranos, Miss Marie Smell. of New Cum
berland, and Miss Nerissa Sadler, or
wormleysburg; contraltos, Miss Lila
Spencer, of Wormleysburg, and Miss
Helen Lechthaler, of New Cumberland;
tenors, Lewis Zarker, of Pembroke. and
Ernest Dopkee. of Wormleysburg; bass,
Harry Baker, of Wormleysburg, ana
Harry Troup. of Harrisburg; Miss Mil
dred Rudy, of Harrisburg is pianist
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1916-09-08
Church Closes Bait
Field to Stop Fishing

McGregor Iowa, Sept. The
trustees of the local Methodist Epis-
copal Church have taken effective
means of inducing Sunday attendance
in posting the following notice in the
churchyard:
"It cost the Methodist Church con-
siderable to maintain a drainage ditch
around the church in order to keep
the water from flooding the basement.
Parties are in the habit of digging
earth worms in this ditch, which cases
the water to run into the basement.
This practice must be stopped at once.
BY order of the church board"
Anglers say the trustees know the
churchyard is the only good place
to dig worms in McGregor and that no
one can go fishing Sundays without
bait.
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1916-09-08
Took Her Cash to Buy
a New Wife, Wife Says

Chicago, Sept. s. - Eph Adams,
Gypsy, is in dire trouble. He is in a
cell at the detective bureau charged
with larceny and wife and child aban-
donment, and this is why:
Mr.. Rosie Adams charges that he
stole $1,000 of her money, went to
Cicero and used $4,000 of it to buy a
new bride, according to Gypsy custom.
Then detectives, working for his wife
and six children. traced and arrested
him. And to make matters worse, his
50, 900 bride, learning of his wife and
six children, has gone back home.
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1916-09-08
BARRIERS Would Tax
Hairy and Hairless

st. Louis, Mo-, Sept. S.-Men who
have more than the normal amount
of hair to cause the barber trouble, and
men who have less than the allotted
amount. both should be subject to a
tax, In the opinion of the journeymen
BARRIERS
AT meeting of the ST. Louis Jour
neymen BARRIERS Union held here a
cnarse OF FIVE cents was endorsed for
trimming mustache - heretofore
trimmed free with hair cut or shave
and charge of at least Is cents
was urged for hair restorer or tonic
placed on the Uranium of a bald
headed gentleman. The present charge
is ten cents
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1916-09-08
Would Bar Handshake
in War on Paralysis

Newark, Ohio, Sept. 4.-Dr. D. H.
Kress, of Washington, D. c., addressed
a large crowd at the Ohio Adventists
conference at Mound Builders Park
here on infantile paralysis.
He said that a ban on promiscuous
kissing and handshaking. together
with common drinking cup and other
recognized means of spreading dis
ease, will be necessary before the
spread of infantile paralysis is check
ed. He advocated sunlight as one of
the essential things necessary for a
cure.
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1916-09-08
ITALIAN FREIGHT RATES RAISED

Rome, Sept. Z. - Railroad freights
in Italy have been raised 10 per cent.
1t is estimated that by this action the
government railroad revenues will be
increased $4,000, 900 annually. The OBJ
ject in raising the rates was to obtain
money to pay extra wages of the rail-
way employees totaling $4,000. 600,
which were granted recently after
complaints by the men of the high
cost of living and the extra work en-
tailed by reason of the war.
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1916-09-08
STONE WHERE ZEPPELIN FELL

London. Sept. s. - The site on the
hillside at Cuffiey where Lieutenant
William Leefe Robinson, of the Royal
Flying Corps brought down Zeppelin
during the German air raid on the east
coast of England Saturday night, has
been presented to the nation by it's
owner, Mrs. Kidston. The gift is
made with the understanding that a
suitable monument shall be erected
by public subscription on the spot
where the Zeppelin fell.
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1916-09-08
5000 Pounds of Sugar
Is Dispatched by Mail

Marysville, Cal. Sept. s. One
hundred 50-pound stacks of sugar were
mailed from Marysville to Weaverville,
Trinity county, more than $50 miles
distant by local wholesale firm. The
postage of the 5000 pounds amounted
to $50.
Had the sugar been sent by the or
binary freight, it would have necessi-
tated its being sent to Redding by
train and then hauled by freight wa
gon more than fifty miles and the
charges would have been more than
double the postage.
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1916-09-08
Bags and Trunks
For School and Travel

Not alone do we feature
matchless quantities, but the
very best grades obtainable, as,
Likly, Belber and Indestructo.
Bags and Suit Cases
CSC to $3.50
Dress Trunks, $4.95 to $16.50.
Steamer Trunks, $4.95 to $50.
Wardrobe Trunks
S15 to $3.50
BOWMAN'S-Second Floor
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1916-09-08
NO ELECTIONS DURING WAR
By Assoeiatcd Pres!

Amsterdam, Sept. Z. - The Tag
lische Rundschau" announces that the
German government has decided that
there shall be no general election dur
ing the war. The Reichstag on reas-
sembling, the newspaper adds, will
pass measure prolonging its life until
next January.
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1916-09-08
KREIsLER TO PLAY HERE

At a meeting or the Harrisburg
Society for the Prevention of Cruelty
to Animals held yesterday plans for
holding an entertainment here next
month were discussed. Fritz Kreisler
the noted violinist, may be the attrac
ton. The proceeds would be used to
defray expenses of the society.
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1916-09-08
SLIPS BENEATH TRAIN; TOES
CRUSHED

When Frank Idall. 2714 Park street.
Baltimore, a salesman. stepped from
A passenger train at MELVILLE yester-
day afternoon. he slipped. The wheels
ran over his feet and badly lacerated
several of his toes. He was brought
to the Harrisburg hospital where the
injured toes were amputated.
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1916-09-08
WINCHFSTFR FAIR

The c. V. R. r. will sell tickets to
Winchester, Va. during week of the
Fair, September II to 16. at special
excursion rates. For time of trains
consult Ticket Agent.-Adv.
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1916-09-08
TO PROSECUTE JITNEY DRIVERS

Prosecutions against unlicensed jit-
ney drivers have been resumed again
by City Solicitor d. S. Seitz, and four
warrants were sworn out yesterday
Last night Ira Geiger. one of the four
gave himself up and will be given a
hearing next week
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1916-09-08
ENTERTAINs EMBROIDERY CLUE
DINNER FOR GUESTS

New Cumberland, Sept. s. Mrs.
William Baum, of Market street, en-
tertained the following guests at din
ner Sunday evening: F. a. Shaffer,
Carlisle; S. B. Shaffer, Mrs. Christie
Floyd and daughter, Highspire; Mr.
and Mrs. ]. r. Spangler and Paul
Myers. New Cumberland
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1916-09-08
WILSON SIGNS COMPENSATION

Washington. Sept s. - President
Wilson last night signed the federal
workmen's compensation act passed
recently by Congress, providing relief
for government employees injured at
cir work.
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1916-09-08
Embarrassing Hairs
Can Be Quickly Removed
(Beauty Culture)

NbIduIy OUIIUIGJ
Hairs can be easily banished from
che skin by this quick, painless
method: Mix into a stiff paste some
powdered delatone and water, spread
on hairy surface and in or minutes
rub off, wash the skin and it will be
free from hair or blemish. Excepting
in very stubborn growths, one applica-
ton is sufficient. To avoid disap-
pointment. buy the delatone in an
original package.
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1916-09-08
Autumn Footwear Fashions
Models exclusive and made especially
for Bo1Uma1 & Co.

The Bowman Special" at So
Patent colt, dull mat kid and
glazed kid skin boots, laced and
button. High cut, So.
The Bowman Peerless" at So
Mahogany kid, ebony kid with
gray kid toppings, turns and
welts. High cut. Button and
lace, Sc.
P0WNFA N
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1916-09-08
sURRENDERs TO POLICE

Max Fassig, who according to the
police, was one of a trio who assaulted
man in River Front Park, August
20, surrendered yesterday to the au-
thorities. He was held for a hear
ing to-day.
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1916-09-08

The Bowman Perfection" at $3.50
Original types are introduced in
black and white feathers, combin-
ing grace of line, fnesse and flex-
ibility, $50.
The Bowman preferred" at $40
The finest handmade boots made,
possessing all the fine little
touches of custom work. Styles
de luxe, $40.
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1916-09-08
Silver Tableware
FOUNDED 1871

Bouillon spoons, H dozen ...... S1.90
Sugar shell and butter knife set. :. zee
Cold meat forks, each ......... 64c
Berry spoons, each ............. csc
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1916-09-08

BowMAN'S-Main Floor.
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1916-09-08

BOWMAN'S-Main Floor.
The Bridgeport evening farmer., 1916-09-28

Graveur through the heart and killed herself in the same manner. She fell upon her back and while her right hand held the weapon, her left rested in the open hand of Graveur.
 Collapses on Roof Garden.
 Mrs. Leduc made her way up a flight of stairs to the roof garden and there collapsed. Manager Miller caused at tendants to carry her down the stair way, the while he Agna1ed to the or chestra leader to keep up the music and stop the crowding of people around the woman, announcing she had mere ly fainted,
 Mrs. Apma4 identified her brother and Mrs. Belzer in the Philadelphia morgue yesterday. Mrs. Mann was at her sisters bedside last night
 Graveur after making a record in probation work was finally disgraced and discharged when 1t was proved he had Been conniving with criminals to hand their names up to the courts as first offenders and thus gain them light sentences- He had also been off, cially connected with the Children's society. As social reformer he ap- peared as a star witness before the Rockefeller Grand Jury which investi- gated white slavery.
The Bridgeport evening farmer., 1916-09-28
TWENTY YEARS AGO
HAVE A FORGER IN CUSTODY

-1 1A OASIA1Ab LIN OOoLOD4s
 The police of the Second Precinct have an important prisoner in one of their cells. He is a forger and has been working about the state for sev- eral weeks. It is his scheme to go to livery stable and hire a team or go to store and purchase some goods. In each instance he has always been short funds, but has a check fin readiness. Yesterday a tall young man entered the office of Herman Spoering, the liv- eryman, in East Main street and hired team. When he returned he was short of ready cash. This morning he called at the stable and offered a check for $20 In payment for his bill which amounted to $5, He asked that the balance of the money due on the check be paid him in small bills. The clerk in chargetof the office was sus, pfcious he notified the police of the second precinct with the result that the bearer of the check was soon lock- ed up. The prisoner gave the name of Frank Smith. The check was for s20 and was drawn on the West Side bank of New York city and was made by F. c. Beach, payable to Frank Smith. Supt. Birmingham is satisfied that Smith Is a professional crook and forger,
The Bridgeport evening farmer., 1916-09-28
Memorial Farm at Rowayton Teaches
 Boys Agriculture

A memorial farm has recently been dedicated at Rowayton. in honor of Rev. w. G. French. This farm was started for the purpose of teaching childl en scientific farming and allied subjects. It is cooperative in it's scope and the plan calls for place where each lad may become self-sup- porting and still get his education. The boys are taught all forms of ag- riculture and Horticulture and then sell the produce raised, canned and pre- served, to personal friends and others. Each boy earns a certain amount based on his earning capacity, which is applied to his support, and he is compelled to lay by certain amount weekly toward his future.
 The boys sleep out of doors the year round, and have balanced ration. They have built a large framework on which stand soil, trees and an electric arilway. This is the agricultural map of the country and is divided into sec tions representing the states of the Union. Thus the boys transport over the railways the products grown in every section of the country and learn their geography and arithmetic.-The Field Illustrated. --s-...--.
The Bridgeport evening farmer., 1916-09-28
CARF|ELD'S SON
 CR|T|C|SES TESS FOR STATEMENTS
Deplores Attempt to Raise Once More the Issue Of
 Sectionalism.

Williamstown, Mass. Sept. B. Harry A. Garfield, president of Will Hams College and son of James A. Garfield, general in the Union Army and martyred President of the United States, gave out the following state ment yesterday as his protest against the Republican attempt to make Sec t onalism an issue:
 Representative Simeon D. Fess, of Ohio, is reported to have said! Had any one been found so bold as to have ventured a prophecy that the time would come when the Union soldier would see the entire government which he saved under full control of the states which attempted to destroy it, he would have been regarded as can dfdate for the asylum
 '"The attempt to rel1indle old fires of hatred between the North and the South is reprehensible in the extreme. The South to-day is not the South of 1861. It does not desire to return to slavery nor the dissolution of the Un- ion. Any attempt to confuse the old and the new South is due to ignorance OA u 6 uClipcIdtS pOSo tO UclOS the minds of voters. The South is seeking to develop its agricultural and industrial resources by the same meth ods as those employed in the North.
 "In so far as Southern Representa- tives, have sought special favors for eirNdistricts, forgetfu1 of national in- terests, they are b1ameworthy, but the prevalence of local spirit is not new. It is also a Republican failing and has been cardinal vice of the domin- ant party since the first Congress It is quite as reasonable to assert that the Republicans seek to regain politi- cal control in the interest of plutocrat- ic government because the chairman of important committees of Congress would then hail from the northeast section of the country as to say that the Democrats seek to retain control in the interest of the South of 1861, be- cause the chairmen of those commit tees reside in the Southern States.
 "The real question before the voter Is whether the Great Problems of the day, international as well as national, will be more wisely and ably handled by continuing MT. Wilson and his party in power or by turning the government over to MT. Hughes and his supporters. The records of the past eight years, not those of fifty years ago, are signif- icant."
The Bridgeport evening farmer., 1916-09-28
CONVICTIONS FOR MANY WHO TRIED
 TO MULCT BANKS
Most of Offenses May Be Blamed on Carelessness of
 Clerks, Report Shows.

Kansas City, Mo-, Sept. 2s.-Crimes committed against banks represented in the American Bankers association during the last year have shown no marked increase, according to the an- nual report of the Protective Depart ment at the convention of the associa- ton here to-day, and it was further shown that a large proportion of the burglaries and similar crimes proved unsuccessful.
 For the period from August 1, 1915, to Sept 1, this year, there was a total of 42s arrests and 307 convictions. The report notes that the losses suffered by members in connection with bur gIaries amounted only to $7,754, while the loss to non-members amounted to more than $60,0o0. Through 36 hold ups, however, there was a loss to mem- bers of $65,s21, and through nine sneak thefts loss of $26,500. The department now has 4, ,720 photographs of criminals, comprising burglars. holdup men, sneak thieves, forgers. and bogus check operators, with complete record of each.
 A large number of the crimes at- tempted against bankers are due to carelessness on the part of the banks in permitting customers to use funds represented in uncollected checks, ac- cording to the report, and it was rec commended that this practice be dis continued. Trouble is also caused through the practice of leaving blank checks on the counters, and it was urged that this practice be modified by printing across the face of such checks the words Counter Check"
The Bridgeport evening farmer., 1916-09-28
STEPNEY

Edward Gray of Bridgeport was a guest Sunday of his mother, Mrs. Ho- mer Roberts.
 Mrs. William Nichols has been en- tertaining as guest, her brother, Frank Mellen.
 Twelve pupils were enrolled in the Upper Stepuey school and seven at the lower school Monday. The attendance in the town is small as many parents kept their children at home still fear ing the poliomyelitis plague.
 MT. and Mrs H. J. Lord left today for Florida where they will spend sev- eral mouths at their winter home at Orlando.
 MT. and Mrs. Ira Perf1eld, who have been spending the summer here, have returned to Danbury.
 Miss Katherine Williams, who has been the guest of her grandmother, Mrs. Emily L. Leavenworth, for a few weeks, has returned to Brooklyn.
 Miss Ruth Beardsley has left for Bridgeport where she will attend High shool this fall.
 Mrs. Powell of Poughkeepsie, who is a guest of her son, Rev. George Powell, fell down the cellar stairs Mon. day evening. Dr. Gallup of Long Hill was summoned and it was found Mrs. Powell was suffering with a broken knee.
 Henry F. Morgan has returned from his summer home at Amagansett, Long Island.
 Edward Kneen of Shelton was a re- ent guest of relatives in the village. Mrs. Moses Hull Is visiting at the home of Mrs. Pameta B. Wheeler.
 D. A. Greene. supervision of schools, paid his initial visit to the schools Monday.
 Miss Caroline Garlick was a recent guest of friends in Monroe.
 Alfred Edwards and Chester w. Tyrrell are at work filling their silos this week.
 The Methodist mid-week prayer meetings have been resumed.
 Augustus Cohatz has returned to New York.