The Lakeland evening telegram. (Lakeland, Fla.) 1911-1922, 1916-07-22
The Education Of
Marriage
By ELINOR MARSH

was twenty-five years old and had a
prospect of long life ahead. He was
a hard worker and very saving, his
idea being to get nest egg-for ma
ture leads us all to build nests, and
man can't do it as the birds do, by
getting together few straws and 9TH
er such material. He must have mon.
ey to pay for his domicile.
Young personal---very. young persons
don't look upon matrimony with the
misgivings of their elders. Jim's idea
OF a home was a comfortable house
with very nice wife in it, or at least
a suit Of rooms. He was to own the
house and the wife and the furniture.
The wife was to be there to minister
to his wants and comforts.
Jennie Owens was the daughter of
a widow. Jennie was twenty years
old. She was a high school graduate
and aimed partly to support herself
and her mother, who had a little in
come, by stenography and typewrit-
ing. But Jim Hawks came along,
talked very sweetly to her and in time
induced her to marry him. Both want
ed a home; both wanted to fulfil the
destiny nature intended for them.
This was all very well, but neither
had been educated to matrimony.
Jim had his preconceived notions of
what his wife should be to him, and
she had her preconceived notions of
what he should be to her. AS soon as
the honeymoon ended these preconceiv-
ed notions began to clash. Jim's habit
of saving money did not grow less with
two to provide for. He kept control of
the cash and pinched his wife for
small expenditures. he had not been
used to considering the requirements
of any one except himself and needed
practice to become used to considering
those of another. He was not exactly
what his wife expected to find him,
and she thought that in certain re-
spects she might make him over. She
remained in their three rooms all day
and when evening came needed a
change Of scene, to say nothing Of
recreation. Jim worked hard all day
and when evening came desired to
rest. Besides, going out required some
expenditure, If only car fare. And
when it was necessary to spend money
he was used to spending 1t on himself.
These things caused scraps, and the
scraps gradually grew to be quarrels
Jennie usually had the right of the
question, but did not know how to use
it SO as to impress her husband that
he was in the wrong. While he was
wrong in trying to dominate her, she
acted intellectually.
One evening Jennie desired Jim to 60
with her to an evening party given by
one Of her friends. Jim wouldn't 90.
She said she would go alone and asked
him to come TO bring her home. He
made no reply. She went, and since
he did not come for her she remained
at her friends all night. She should
have gone home early the next day,
but instead spent the day and the night
with her mother. On returning the
next day she found her home deserted.
Here was break between two per-
SONS who, If they could have been pre-
pared for their parts, might have got
over this early married period, have
gradually become used to each other
and settled down into happy married
life. What a contrast between this
antagonism and the mutual depend.
| ence of ten or twenty years later!
Jennie made an effort for a recon.
Citation, but since she did not accom-.
pany 1t by confession that she, and
she only, was in the wrong Jim paid
no attention to her pleadings. Then
her mother advised her to let him
alone. If he ever came to realize that
he was giving up that which was pleas
ing and ennobling for his preconceived
notions of what a wife should be tt
him he would very likely conquer bis
pride and return to her. II not she
could do no more than she had done
and the matter must adjust itself Oh
remain unadJusted without any fur
Their action on her part.
For awhile Jim persuaded himself
that he had acted the part Of a stront
man in asserting himself and In re
fusing to live with a woman who, Al
he expressed 1t, would take the bi
in her teeth and run away with every
thing" But he had been very happl
for awhile in his home with his wife
His mother had taken his part in hi
disagreements with his wife. and b.
went to live with her. But ne ha'
reached an age when a man crave
his own rooftree and hearthstone, ant
he was not satisfied He met with al
accident In his work, and, though hi
mother cared for him tenderly. b
pined for his wife. Between her AM
him was a deathly silence. Jennie di,
not try to win him back to her. H
was a man of strong win and must g
his own way. Besides, no reunio
could last unless he became satishe
that his wife had rights as well a
himself.
One day Jennie heard a click at th
gate and. looking out through a wiz
dow, saw her husband coming. Wit
beaming eyes and a smile she went
meet him
: "Jennie." he said. 81 treated 20
brutally. VIM you forgive meY
ut was all my fault" she replied.