davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The citizen-Republican. (Scotland, Bon Homme County, S.D.) 1???-19??, 1916-04-06
Why They Laugh In Vaudeville.

Why They Laugh In Vaudeville.
From the Chicago Tribune.
John and Mae Burke:
Are you a soldier?"
What kind Of a soldier are you?'
I'm a boy SLOUGH. But you say you
Ire a soldier. too"
Yes, there are 5000 women in my
army"
Five thousand women. I want to
Join. I'm a home guard
What are the duties of a home
guard?"
why, I stay home and take care of
he regular soldiers wives
Were o ever in a regular battle %
Il lived with my mother-in-law two
years."
THAT wasn't a battle"
mo, that was a riot"
Are you brave?"
Il should say so. I hadn't been in the
army two weeks before I saved the en-
tire regiment"
you did,! How"
ST shot the cook"
Il uppos your father was q soldier
before you"
Yes. father soldiered all his life. He
never would work. Speaking Of brave
men, you've got to hand it to Woodrow
Wilson"
Why"
Hes the first president tha ever
had nerve enough to give Bryan a job.
And Bryan couldn't keep it. But 1
think there's another brave ma1-the
chauffeur that drove Harry Tbaw in
his escape from Mattewan."
Il don't see anything brave about
that chauffeur"
We'll. he drove a car 90 miles an
hour with a loose nut"
B u he isn't as brave as Teddy
Roosevelt"
Teddy Roosevelt! Why, he wasn't
brave. My father fought shoulder to
shoulder with Roosevelt at San Juan
hill. A cannon ball Clipped off the end
of Teddy's finger and he yelled SO loud
you could heard him a alie, and right
beside him was my father with his
head shot off and not saying q word"
"What did they call you in the
army?"
They called me Useless"
"Useless?"
"Yes-after General Grant"
90. I see"
"once, after a battle, the captain
called me and said: Useless, you're a
union sofdier, and you've done@a union
days work. Put on my union Fsuit and
go home"
The citizen-Republican. (Scotland, Bon Homme County, S.D.) 1???-19??, 1916-04-06
CAPE OF THE BABY
BIRTH REGISTRATION.

Prepared by the Children's Bureau. United
Stntes Department of Labor.

Prepared by the Children's Bureau. United
States Department of Labor.
Has the birth rate of your baby beer
registered? II not. you should see TO II
mat this duty is performed without de-
lay. 1t may some time be of the greatest
Importance 20 your child that there be il
existence an accurate legal record of his
birth, date, place, and parentage. Such
a record serves to establish his age be-
yond question, and through his his right
to the legal period of schooling and free
dom from labor. 1t may also serve TO es-
tabiish his right to a disputed inheritance
and to establish for him various property
Or other legal rights which may be in
aFspute There are numerous instances
"here the lack of this sort of record has
been the cause of serious losses of inherl-
lance n of educational and other rights.
IN New York city in 1913 the birth rec
ords nelped to enforce the personal or
property rights or more thar 1875, 900 per-
sons.
IL Is, in most states. required by law
ehaf the doctor, midwife or other atten-
cant at birth, h report the birth to the
REGISTRAR or births, but as this duty is not
~'Lrequently neglected, parents should in.
Sestlsate to see whether it has been done
properly in the case Of their children.
Inc complete registering of all births II
u''Po'iS"pie, not only TO the 1ndlVldu2
put TO the state and the nation.
Inc federal government can and does
tell us exactly how great is the accession
TO our population each year by imnnigra-
tlon, or intake from foreign lands. Al
each port of landing immigration inspec-
TORS record each arrival and tell US his or
hef nationality, age sex, destination, and
now much money each one brings. But
tle FEDERAL government can not go into
1le states and cities and establish regis.
tratlon offices and tell us how many chill.
uren enter each state by birth. This WORK
Inust be done by each state separately.
have no national bookkeeping to ac,
count for the ebb and flow of human life
6s an asset and a liability of Our civic
organism. We have no national records to
give our sanatoIiums and students a basis
Tor their preventive studies. Congress by
resolution has urged the states to enact
and enforce suitable registration legisla-
tion. The state governments must now
act.
Most of the states now nave adequate
their enforcement, however, depends
% a large extent upon popular support.
lhis support is assured If individual par
ents Will insist upon the registration OF
Zach birth.
The citizen-Republican. (Scotland, Bon Homme County, S.D.) 1???-19??, 1916-04-06

Mature.

As a fond mother, when the day Is Ger,
Leads by the hand her little child to bed,
Half-wilIjng. half-reluctant to be led,
And leaves his broken playthings on the
floor.
door,
Not wholly treasured and comforted
BY promises of others In their stead,
Wnich, though more splendid. may not
please him more;
So Nature deals with us, n takes away
Our playthings. one by one, and by the
hand
Leads us so gently that we go
Scarce knowing if we wish to go OF STAY.
Being too full of sleep to understand
ftoW far the unknown transcends tbs
The citizen-Republican. (Scotland, Bon Homme County, S.D.) 1???-19??, 1916-04-06
SONG That ALWAYS Gets Applause.
II &c natural fha4 tho eonr ~ ..H.-;<

- - Siidl llO SOllS VI DlAlG
the north also it gains applause over
any other air. In the Woman's Home
Companion, a writer says
A a recent exhibition of the Clans
man. in Los Angeles. people cheered
to the echo while the orchestra played
Dixie n those same people sat abb
solutely still while the orchestra played
America The Star Spangled Ban
ner.' and Yankee Doodle those dear
old songs that stirred the soul of my
father. who fought for his country in
the civil war. and my brother. VINO
fought In the Spanish-American war.
[ do not object to Dixie. l love it my
self. But Dixie is decidedly southern
and not national"
The citizen-Republican. (Scotland, Bon Homme County, S.D.) 1???-19??, 1916-04-06
WISE HOSTESS
Won Her Guests to Postum.

Three great coffee drinkers were
my old school friend and her two
daughters.
Iney We're always complaining and
taking medicine. / determined to give
them Postum instead Of coffee when
they visited me, SO without saying
anything to them about it, I made a
big pot OF Postum the first morning.
Before the meal was half over,
each n passed up her cup to be re-
hiied, remarking how fine the coffee
was. The mother asked for a third
cup and inquired as to the brand OF
coffee ! used. | didn't answer her
question Just then. for / heard her say
9 while before that she didn't like Pos.
tum unless it was more than hair
coffee.
After breakfast I told her that the
coffee she liked SO well at breakfast
was pure Postum, and the reason she
liked It was because it was properly
made.
have been brought up from 4
wretched invalid, to q fne
condition Of physical health BY 1eav.
Ing on coffee and using Postum.
4 am doing all / can to helm tha
world from coffee slavery to Postum
freedom, and have earned the graft.
tude Of many, many friends. Name
given BY Postum Co. Battle Creek.
Mich.
Postum comes in two forms:
The citizen-Republican. (Scotland, Bon Homme County, S.D.) 1???-19??, 1916-04-06
Sat From Hawaii.

Ore Of the minor products of the
Hawaiian Islands is salt. the output
Tor 1919 having been 2,40o tons, val.
aed at IS a ton. Nest of the salt pro.
duced III the islands is the output Of
the Honolulu Salt company, whose
product is confined to coarse salt and
manufactured entirely by natural evan.
Grafton, no vacuum pans, kettles or
graincrs being used.
The citizen-Republican. (Scotland, Bon Homme County, S.D.) 1???-19??, 1916-04-06
ART A TRUST
WORTHY HISTORY
John Ruskin.

Great nations write their autobin-
graphies in three manuscripts-the
book Of their deeds. the book of
their words and the book Of their
art. Not IN OF these books can be
Understood unless we read the two
others; but Of the three, the only
quite trustworthy one Is the last.
urnphant by its good fortune: and
its words mighty by the geriius o.
a few OF its children; bur its art
only by the general gifts and CONF
mon sympathfes OF the race.
The citizen-Republican. (Scotland, Bon Homme County, S.D.) 1???-19??, 1916-04-06

Mrs. ~Abercrombie, wife of Con-
gresham ]. W. Abererombie. of Ala
bama, is one of WashingAoais poSfu-
lar h~ostesses. Like hes husband, who
was a university president beBcse he
was sent to congress, Mrs. Aber-
crombie is well known among south
ern educators.
The citizen-Republican. (Scotland, Bon Homme County, S.D.) 1???-19??, 1916-04-06

Buffalo, N. T., has formally gone on
record. through it's chamber Of COM
merce. as opposing tag days hereafter.
the principal u being, it would
seem. that the latest effort of the Kind
produced only 500. although when The
idea was new, tag days had netted as
high as sl2. 600.
The citizen-Republican. (Scotland, Bon Homme County, S.D.) 1???-19??, 1916-04-06
TO Be Exact.

DO You mean to tell me that you
know all the latest dance steps?.
! wouldn't say all OF course. I
don't know what new steps have
been invented since I've been stard.
ing here chatting with YOU"
The citizen-Republican. (Scotland, Bon Homme County, S.D.) 1???-19??, 1916-04-06
Tho First British Americans.
From the New york POST.

Professor Muensterberg proves that
Wilson is pro-British by showing that all
four of his grandparents were of imme-
date British extraction. Does the pro-
lessor recall how pro-British were once
100000 colonists who were born as British
citizens?
The citizen-Republican. (Scotland, Bon Homme County, S.D.) 1???-19??, 1916-04-06

Nine. Cuadra, wife Of Joaquin
Cuadra. secretary of the Nicaraguan
legation and daughter Of the Nicara-
guam secretary of state. is one of the
most attractive Of Washingfon's
diplomatic hostasses. Her beauty Is
Of pronounced Spanish type.
The citizen-Republican. (Scotland, Bon Homme County, S.D.) 1???-19??, 1916-04-06

New York has over so trust COM
panies.
The citizen-Republican. (Scotland, Bon Homme County, S.D.) 1???-19??, 1916-04-06

English has 90 sounds
The citizen-Republican. (Scotland, Bon Homme County, S.D.) 1???-19??, 1916-04-06

Paderewskl favors woman suffrage.
The citizen-Republican. (Scotland, Bon Homme County, S.D.) 1???-19??, 1916-04-06

New York has over 700 hotels.
Tensas gazette. [volume] (St. Joseph, La.) 1886-current, 1916-06-09
Japanese In the Philippines.

For some months it has been known
that a powerful Japanese syndicate,
says the Kobe Chronicle, has been
casting longing eyes on several large
sugar estates in the Philippines, and
particularly on the one owned by the
Dominican order of friars in the fruit
full province of Laguna; and for the
last few weeks 1t has been known to
many that negotiations concerning the
latter were drawing to a close, and
that there was every probability of the
property of the Dominican order of
friars going over to Japanese mer-
chants. Two days ago (says the Ma
Mia correspondent of the North China
Daily News under date of February
12) we learned that the sale had been
completed, the transfer taking place
at midnight on February Z, when the
personal representative of the Japa-
nese syndicate, Mr.. X. Hada. took
charge Of the estate. On the follow
ing morning the heads of the various
departments were notified that their
services were no longer required, and
their places were Immediately taken
by Japanese who were all in readiness.
Tensas gazette. [volume] (St. Joseph, La.) 1886-current, 1916-06-09
DAISIES
BY L. M. BENNINGTON.


No flower in all the garden series is
more beloved than the star-eyed daisy.
or marguerite And perhaps no
flower has undergone a more decided
improvement than this same flower,
which fills the meadow spaces with its
nodding white and in better soil looks
statelier from the garden path.
The daisy should have a place in
the garden. They make delightful Dor
ders to beds of taller-growing ANIMALS,
and can be used very effectively in
beds of strengthening bulbs.
Daisies may be sown at intervals for
succession, in shallow boxes of light
rich soil. Cover the seed to about
three times their own thickness, and
press the soil firmly over them. Keep
the box in a warm window. greenhouse
or hotbed
Transplant to new boxes and set out
in the open ground when danger from
frost is past Daisies can be sown
in beds outside In August or Septem-
Der. They must be protected with
straw or litter through the winter and
transplanted to their permanent posi-
ton in the spring.
The orange daisy, South African
orange daisy, has become q great IA
vorite. 1t was introduced few years
ago and has been made much of at the
flower shows and is used largely on
big estates. It is excellent for Dor
ders and as q pot-plant.
Tensas gazette. [volume] (St. Joseph, La.) 1886-current, 1916-06-09
MUCH DEPENDS ON BREEDERS
Parents Of Chicks Should Be Strong,
Vigorous, Hardy and Resistant
to All Diseases.

Whether a farmer will raise better
poultry this year than he did last will
depend primarily upon the kind of
stock that is used for breeding. Every
baby chick is entitled to be we'll born.
Unless its parents are strong. vigor-
Gus, hardy and resistant to disease, a
poor hatch" and weak, puny chicks
will result, say the poultrymen at Iowa
state college.
The use of low vitality breeders is
the most frequent cause of poor incu-
batting success and high death rate in
brooding. Chicks Matched from poor
breeding stock never reach the size of
well-bred individuals. The pullets do
not begin laying until the following
spring and then hardly enough to pay
for their feed.
II the flock is to be improved, only
those birds that show size. vigor and
reproducing qualities should be used
as breeders. Twenty-Five good females
in a roomy pen with a couple of good
males will furnish eggs for incubation
that will produce chicks worth while,
ones that will grow into big fellows
worth a good price on the market.
The pullets from such mating mature
rapidly and are in condition to LAY
the winter eggs"
Tensas gazette. [volume] (St. Joseph, La.) 1886-current, 1916-06-09
DUCK RAISING AS BUSINESS
Fowls Are Fine for Family Use
Though Not Very Valuable as
Product for Marketing.

The duck has its place on the farm.
but duck raising as a business is as
yet comparatively Improbable be-
cause of long distance to market and
prejudice among buyers of live poul-
try. The duck furnishes delicious
roast for the family and an abun-
dance of feathers for home use.
Contrary to general opinion.
pool large enough for swimming is
not necessary" says N. L. Harris. su-
perintendent of the Kansas state agri-
cultural college poultry farm. Ducks
can be raised on dry land-that is, II
they are provided with water suffi-
GENTLY deep to allow them to sub
merge their beaks and wash the sand
from their nostrils Otherwise they
will die.
The natural food for ducks consists
of bugs, worms and green succulent
vegetation found in marshy places.
Notwithstanding the fact that ducks
are easily raised, they should not be
Matched until warm weather, at which
time such feeds are plentiful.
There is danger of overlooking. ac-
cording to Mr.. Harris. The duck is
Tensas gazette. [volume] (St. Joseph, La.) 1886-current, 1916-06-09

ment, their effect being mainly a
stimulating character to the nerves of
taste or secretion. They serve a pur-
pose in adding flavor to insipid food
and relieve monotony in diet.
In some dyspeptic conditions of the
stomach the use Of strong condiments
like red pepper or tabasco sauce az
fords relief by exciting the activity of
the stomach, but as to their value in
prolonging health they are much over
estimated.
The use Of some condiments is
likely to be abused, such as pepper,
curry and vinegar. When used in ex-
cess, they seriously disorder the d.
gestion. Curry powders of various
sorts are prepared by mixing strong
condiments. such as red pepper, gin
ger and turmeric and starch. People
leading indolent lives and INDUCING
too freely in the good things of the
table, are tempted to aid the stomach
by the use of exciting stimulants. In
warm climates this is especially not
ed. The advice given to those not
used to hot climates is to confine the
food to fruit and vegetables largely,
stunning heterogeneous food and condi-
ments and alcoholic beverages.
Next to salt, which is the symbol of
hospitality in the Orient and is a ne
cessity in nearly all our foods, comes
pepper, mustard, ginger and vinegar.
Much difference of taste as to the use
of condiments exists. The Persians
like asafetida, which most of US re-
member with not little unpleasant
ness as q disinfectant.
Certain condiments are best served
with certain foods; thus mustard and
ham, pepper with eggs. red pepper
with raw oysters, vinegar with spin
nch
Tensas gazette. [volume] (St. Joseph, La.) 1886-current, 1916-06-09
GRADING the Little Chicks.

Owing to differences in the vigor of
parent stock, age of eggs when incu-
bated, and other causes, there are al.
ways differences in the vitality of the
chicks, and these manifest themselves
very quickly. The stronger chicks
shove the weaker away from the food.
crowd them out of the sunniest spots
in the brooder, and take the best of
things generally.
Since the most vigorous chicks are
the most valuable. we do not like to
discourage this disposition to thrive.
but strong chicks should not thrive
at the expense of the weak. AS soon
as there is perceptible difference
in the size of the chicks, either grade
the chicks according to size, or fix
things SO the weak chicks can eat bv
themselves.
Tensas gazette. [volume] (St. Joseph, La.) 1886-current, 1916-06-09
PRINCE WAS HIS CHAUFFEUR
German Soldier Describes Queer Ex.
perience He Had Recently at
the Front.

The following excerpt from the let
ter of a field artilleryman from
suburb of Cologne, telling his wife Of
his ride with the crown prince on the
western front, is going the rounds Of
the German press:
Il started for H. at noon today.
There was not wagon in sight.
was very tired from loading casks and
dragging boxes around, and il l had
not had two letters for H. from COM
rades and thus was obliged to go there,
I should have turned back.
Then an auto hove in sight!
planted myself in the middle of the
road. spread out my arms, and the
machine stopped. On the right side Of
the forward seat sat the chauffeur and
on his left a major. A man covered
with galloons from top to bottom
opened the door, and l took a seat
inside.
"The chauffeur said; Well. COM
rade, where do you want to go?
said: AS far as H. The chauffeur
laughed and said, All right Then he
looked around again and smiled at me
oLce more. He, apparently was glad
tt-At l was pleased. The ride was a
fast one. l pulled my cap down over
my ears, and the chauffeur looked
around again and laughed. l thought,
Does he know me? But how does he
dare smile at me so while a major is
seated beside him? He certainly is
nervy.'
AS l catch a glimpse of II. half
turn around and say: May / ask to
be let out?' Then | noticed for the
first time that the man who sits back
of me is an imperial chauffeur. Then
he said to the driver: The gentleman
would like to get out and whispered
to me at the same time that the man
ahead who is guiding the auto and who
has smiled at me so often is a high
superior officer
Thunder and lightning, / said to
myself. Jump out quickly and stand
at attention, not before the major, but
before the chauffeur who then said
to me: Well, comrade, dost thou
know who has carried thee?' said:
No. i am the Crown Prince He
laughed again. nodded, put his hand
to his cap, and the auto was gone"
Tensas gazette. [volume] (St. Joseph, La.) 1886-current, 1916-06-09


liberal Interpretation authorizing the
medical which
.errant an Of a o !
maintain the without
comptroller
to the
Tensas gazette. [volume] (St. Joseph, La.) 1886-current, 1916-06-09

frosts will not iniure them. AS the
cold weather comes on. cover the
sashes, but on bright. sunshiny days
uncover and give them plenty OF air.
OF course in very severe weather
they must be thoroughly protected
against freezing. If they are proper
ly cultivated they will bloom in .
month or six weeks.
While carnation growing is not par
ticularly difficult, the plants must be
attended to with great regularity.
They are rich feeders and therefore
must have very rich soil. plenty Of
water and all the air and sun they
can get at the last in order to bring
them forward quickly.
Tensas gazette. [volume] (St. Joseph, La.) 1886-current, 1916-06-09
THE WHITE CARNATI0N
BY BETTY PAKE.

The search for the pure white car.
nation, one that will keep its pure
color for long period. has never
been quite successful.
It is a fact that the average vari-
ETY. remains under cultivation but q
few years, and they are constantly
running out. They must, therefore,, con-
stantly be replaced by newer and
more vigorous varieties grown from
the seed. Often a carnation that pro-
duces beautiful white flowers for two
or three years fails entirely after that
time.
The common garden soil will not do
for the carnation. 1t should be COM
posed of about three-fourths rich, dark
loan and one-fourth well-rotted ma
nure. This should be thoroughly
mixed several times and by Septem-
Der the first cuttings should be placed
in boxes about five inches deep. Set
the plants about ten inches apart.
Syringe thoroughly with water until
they have a good start. The plants
should be staked in order to keep the
flowers above the foliage.
The soil should be frequently treat
ed with liquid manure-cow, sheep,
or hen droppings are excellent-but
it should not be too strong, say about
the color of weak tea.
II you want large flowers you must
disbud the plants judiciously. Give
them plenty Of water and ventilation.
and syringe with tobacco extract to
discourage the red spider.
II potted. they should be in pots
of from four to seven inches accord
ing to the size Of the plants.
The best way !s to propagate them
in cold frames. leaving them uncov-
cred as long as .ossible. The early
Tensas gazette. [volume] (St. Joseph, La.) 1886-current, 1916-06-09
THE BEAUTY OF HYDRANGEAS
BY LIMA r. ROSE.

One of the best late towering. hardy
shrubs is the hydrangea.
While there are other shrubs that
like better, this one seems to be
favorite with the masses. II has the
merit of extreme hardness, easy cul-
ture, great Righteousness. late bloom
ing and persistency.
, Its flowers lose their early white
ness as the season advances. but In
their pinky brown stage they are not
without attractivepess, and even after
snow comes they afford pleasing ef-
fects when seen against background
of pure white.
In planting the hydrangeas. would
never advise using them singly. They
are vastly more effective when
grouped. BY this means we secure
for it a strength and dignity which
single specimens never have. Plant
ed thickly this plant produces q grand
effect
Those who are In search of q plant
that will grow in any soil and under
almost any condition. and has hardi-
ness enough to Withstand the trying
ordeal Of the severest northern win
ter, will find the hydrangea the very
thing they are looking for.