The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1916-10-06

getting that good warm milk was to
be eaten. AT least he pinched it quite
hard, or else violated some other rule |
of good manners, and his mamma |
lifted the hind foot on that side and |
landed jar in his loyal highnesses
ribs. That was enough, for Mr. Calf |
got down to real business for a few
minutes, then quite patiently, stuck his
tongue up his nose for good measure
and got up close to his mammals side
so she could wash him with her
tongue. Queer what people and
things can do with this tongue Let
us not overlook the fact that in this
life the cone is to be eaten.
A man wants to know if I believe
that an ass that the prophet was
riding that time actually talked like a
| man. He doesn't believe that it is
possible for an ass to form words
since his mouth is not made right for
| words. He wonders if some man or
| angel near did not use ventriloqusm
and fool the prophet. Well, now, that
is pretty serious question even for
the Hired Man. l rather think the
thing took place just as recorded in
the bible. l would feel better after
sticking up for the record just as writ
ten. In this short life of mine | have
never heard an ass talk like a man,
but | have heard some men talk like
an ass, and when a fellow gets to ex-
planning away the scripture, he is one
of that kind of fellows. An old Bap-
fist negro in the south in explaining
why nearly all the negroes in that
region were Baptists, said that it was
because a negro did not know enough
to 'splain away the bible. The Hired
Man don't know enough to 'splain
away the bible teaching and so he
must swallow it down just as it is and
let it 60 at that. Then besides if
man will make an ass, don't see why
that same man couldn't make him
speak, if necessity demanded it, So
the creator of asses might fix one up
to talk little if the case called for it.
What do think of the Republicans
standing by Mr.. Christopher? What
does it matter what | think? l am no
criterian to go by. 1t would be very
interesting indeed just to know the
real secret of Mr.. Christopher's pres
ent dilema. He has been a calm
was raised by good parents and has
the devil delights in getting a whack at
the very best of us, and no living man
or woman is at all safe with the devil
around, and the devil is always around.
If Mr., Christopher has been flirting
with the devil and got caught in his
satanic majesty's web, he is entitled
to our sublime sympathy and love. He
ought to come squarely out and tell
us all about it, however, in order to be
entitled to our respect. If he is
guilty from the standpoint of having
|, done wrong within his own self and
by his own volition without being in
fluenced by the devil, then of course
: we will all have to sidetrack him, and
, go after his reform in another way
} He is worth too much to allow little
thing like fifteen thousand dollars
to ditch him for good and all. But as
, | said above, the wrecker will not be
: called out unless he makes a clear
! breast of it all and tells us where the
dough is. Now in refernce to what
, Republican candidates ought to do, my
advice to them is to drop him like {
hot potato, for no honest candidate
: can afford to say God speed to any
| such work. Of course again, if there
| is nothing to all these accusations
: Christopher is being crucified, and il
/ that event Idaho needs a guillotine fol
t all such assassins.
: "How old ought little girl to b,
| when she begins washing her owx
: face?" Now you are kiddin' me. Sht
! ought to wash her own face when sh,
t is four years old, but her MANN:
:. ought to help her once every da,
just to see that she does a good job
\ A little girl is usually pretty gooe
t about washing her face and ears, bu
y a little boy forgets the spot right be
: hind his ears and the wrinkled places
n right in his ears, and these are th'
e worst place to catch dirt | ever saw
c Then boys head, right up on top
k gets lot of dirt in it all the time ant
e even going in swimming don't get i
n out 1t must just be washed ant
d washed with soap and warm water
G but no boy wants to go through all o
Il that soap process, so he would rathc
$ his head would stay soiley.
e 1--WE have a family over here that i
d perfectly colorlblind. They canno
Q tell the difference between one man
: axes and saws and tools. and those O
:. another man. They didn't have an
o of their own to begin with and nov
/. they have quite pile hid away. Can
> you help us?" Answer: The only wa
can help is to see that you get help
a and that I will do. OF course | can
a not become marshal or policeman no
e detective. My hint to all the littl
d thieving folks that may have droppe
: in here during the past three or fou
It years, is simply this: Better look
e little out, for there is wave of de
IF termination spreading everywhere jus
d now that sniping is going to b
l. stopped this fall. A brick wall is liabl
,e to fall on somebody some of thes
IS days, for it will be a difficult matte
it to show where a pile of tools hav
d. been purchased when they were nc
d purchased at all and if they were nc
lie purchased, what is a man doing wit
70 them? Your color-blind family ougf
lie to get some goggles, but since google
ar hard ~ steal the head of thu