The Hays free press. [volume] (Hays, Kan.) 1908-1924, 1916-02-26

even if they do not put it down on pa
per.
When it comes to pettiness the teach
er and the preacher give everybody
else run for the championship. The
petty politician has long ago been found
out.
There are exceptions to the above
statement, but these exceptions are al
so something else beside teachers and
preachers.
The pessimist generally believes that
he can become professor of optimism
In some university. Many have, you
know.
Two weeks ago the Spectator said
that girl often measured a man by
the dizziness with which he could nego-
tate the false cape on her coat and
find her arm. One of the charming
young ladies of Hays met the Specta-
tor last week and the conversation was
as follows:-
/ "Mr. Spectator, how would you
measure girl?"
with thirty inch tape line"
''Why with thirty inch tape line?''
Because that is the length of my
coat sleeve
! Curtain.
And there was a third party present.
5000
Some people have a self-satisfiet
look when you compliment them, others
look as if to say, ST must do better
next time"
We are all very selfish about a fire
After we find out that is not our honse
it is not nearly so interesting.
Nothing makes an old maid so dis
conted with her lot as to see love af
fair which she has broken up fail tt
break the hearts as well.
oooo
. Henry Watterson says that thu
United States has only two friends left
the Atlantic and Pacific oceans.
oooo
I George Bernard Shaw has defnet
war TO be reciprocal humiliation.
7 oooo
The Los Angeles Times mourns tn
departure of the days when a girls neel
was the same color as her face.
, A brick is often the best argument
oooo
Yodel, trill, whips, triple tonguing
: aup fiups, triple k stroke, chut chut
( and cries are some OF the words in tn
technique of whistling as fine art.
oooo
Because it is so much easier to lie
others'do your thinking for you, tn
Spectator suggests that you assert thi
some times in drawing room OF you
acquaintance, 1.-THE bad is good whel
it is bad enough
oooo
A measure of the good time to be hat
at dance might be found in the numbe
of blisters on the feet, if it were no
for the fact that some feet are Xix,
some hearts, bigger than others.
oooo
The new item that golf balls have
gone down, does not interest the Spec
tator, because he has always had hare
enough time making them go up.
oooo
Some people never realize that it is
not what you do that puts you ahead
but how you do what you do.
5000
Some people do everything they do as
it should not be done, and then get sore
at the world for taking them at the
proper valuation.
By saving something today you might
get something tomorrow that you viii
never want, is the way a friend of the
Spectator expressed it the other day.
oooo
Poor, harmless paper, that might
have gone to print a Shakespeare on
and was instead so clumsily defaced
with this nonsense" stevenson.
oooo
The Spectator feels that it is his du-
ty to supply his readers with classical
quotation to use concerningithis column
and here you have it.
5000
There is danger for him who taketh
the tiger cub, and danger also for who
snatcheth delusion from q woman, is
an old Persian saying.
OOoo
The future may be more promising
than the past, but it is not as interest
ing as the past to the Gullible Gossips
of Hays.
oooo
Inertia may make people conformists
| b,1f r-o1CiT, aan DO tho aopoo thing