davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Metropolis weekly gazette. (Metropolis, Ill.) 1???-19??, 1916-01-21
Shark Pulls Mans Tooth.

The shark commonly known as the
hog shark" in native waters is now
fully qualified as dentist; or, in other
words, the big fish recently pulled a
molar in real approved style. A local
bank official was the man who under
went the experience of having his
tooth whisked out of HIS face. Here's
the way IL happened.
He is p. F. Gleason of the Germania
bank force. He was in a launch in
Warsaw sound. While fishing he
placed the line in his mouth, holding
it between his teeth There was a sud
den terrific tug as a shark grasped the
bait and the tooth, exactly in the front
upper gum, was torn Savannah
Dispatch to New York World.
Metropolis weekly gazette. (Metropolis, Ill.) 1???-19??, 1916-01-21
NO ROMANCE IN BUSINESS?
Treasurer of Big Powder Company
Is a Living Denial of the
Statement.

A few years ago the man who was
the dominant interest in certain big
powder company happened to be in
Dayton, o., on business, writes Edwin
Lefeyre in the Saturday Evening Post.
He got on trolley car there and gave
the conductor a five-dollar bill. The
conductor didn't happen to have the
change, as he had just taken in an
other large bill from a passenger, so
he told his fare please to wait until he
could make change. The powder man
arrived at his corner and got off, for
getting the change that was coming to
him.
Several months afterward he again
found himself in Dayton on business,
and again took trolley to reach his
destination. Before the powder man
could find the nickel the conductor
said with a pleasant smile, you're not
going to give me another flve.dollar
bill and forget your change, are you?
It's been waiting for you"
The powder man entered into con-
versation with the conductor, became
interested in the young man and Of
fered to give him job with the pow
der company The conductor accept
ed. He was young, married and had
several children. Also he was a
street car conductor. It isn't very long
ago that he was ringing fares on a
Dayton trolley car; today he is treas
urer of the powder company and has
put through some of the big deals.
Two or three months ago the com.
pany had s23,O00,000 in cash and
looked for investments. The directors
appointed a committee to invest the
money. The treasurer was Entrusted
by the committee with the job and
bought large blocks of stocks in COM
panies that have been turning out war
material, These large investment pur-
ehases have so reduced the floating
supply of many Of these stocks that it
is easy to understand why relatively
small buying orders can cause fluctua-
tons of thirty or forty points. The
former street car conductor. am told,
is worth today s5,Oo0.O0o No romance,
what!
Metropolis weekly gazette. (Metropolis, Ill.) 1???-19??, 1916-01-21
The Ontimist.

Gilman Hall, magazine writer of
New York, said of the war;
ut doesn't pay to be optimistic in
considering this horrid war. Yes, it's
a pretty rotten world that will stand
for war like this.
"Optimists, anyway, come to a bad
end. A preacher in poorhouse said
as he buried an optimist the other
day:
All, what an optimist the world
loses in deceased Once he failed in
business, but thanked heaven he had
his health. Another time he failed
IN health, but thanked heaven he had
his business. Then, just before he en-
tered here, he failed in health and
business simultaneously and said.
oh. well, what good is the one
without the other?'" - Washington
Star.
Metropolis weekly gazette. (Metropolis, Ill.) 1???-19??, 1916-01-21
IS BUILDING FOR posTERlrY
Wonderful Possibilities Confront
Woman When She Enters Into
the Marriage Relation.

When a woman enters the marriage
relation, her sphere of influence is at
once extended, and her horizon is no
longer bound by the people and cir
cumstances of the moment.
She Is building for posterity. In the
joy and thoughtfnlness which charao.
terizes her mind in the new relation
there is prophecy OF unborn gem
erations. Her life is to color other
lives; her aspirations are to fix, to
great extent, the position and fuv
ture of husband and family.
II she is cultured, pure and refined
these qualities will characterize the
home which she creates. The higher
the degree of her culture, her purity
her refinement, the more will these
qualities characterize the home OF
which she is the center.
The personality that a woman takes
with her in her marriage is her real
dover. II her dover can be reckoned
in numerals only no matter how
many they be, wrecked. indeed WIFE
be her husband, impoverished her chill
dren.
But If she possesses industry, gem
tleness, self-abnegation, purity and Inc
telligence, combined with capabilitys
she is in herself treasure of treas
ures.-New York Weekly.
Metropolis weekly gazette. (Metropolis, Ill.) 1???-19??, 1916-01-21
Another Way of PUTTING II.

Bobby had great habit of inquir-
ing ages, especially Of his elders, His
mother, having been embarrassed on
several occasions by his innocent i'm
pertinence, chastised him, warning
him against repeating the question
One Sunday an unmarried woman
came to dinner and she became great
friends with Bobby. The latter, still
remembering his punishment but feel
ing a strong desire to repeat his
query, leaned over and whispered
How long since you came. from God p
Metropolis weekly gazette. (Metropolis, Ill.) 1???-19??, 1916-01-21
He Got the Horse.


A wet Sunday is a trying time for
small boys and girls, and still more SO
for their parents. On one such day
little Donald was very fldgety.
First, he asked his mother IL he
could play with his bricks
oh, mol" was the shocked reply
you don't play with bricks on Sun
dayl"
In turn his trumpet, his drum and
ball were also banned The little chap
was silent for a short time, then he
asked for his horse.
No, no, sonny" admonished his
mother.
Horses don't work on Sunday"
But, mother" argued Donald,
mines a milkman's horse!"
Metropolis weekly gazette. (Metropolis, Ill.) 1???-19??, 1916-01-21
Both Smiled.

The editor sat at his desk A candi-
date entered the room and handed
him a manuscript. The editor smiled
The candidate smiled. They both
smiled. However, their smiles ema-
mated from entirely different sources.
The candidate was smiling because
he wanted, and rsaliy thought, his
manuscript was going to get across.
The editor was smiling because he
knew there wasn't chance in the
orld.-Pennsylvania Punch Bowl.
Metropolis weekly gazette. (Metropolis, Ill.) 1???-19??, 1916-01-21
No Cause for Alarm.

The Pessimist--It Is only a matter
OF time until the land in this country
eill not produce enough TO support
Che increasing population.
The optlmist-Oh. don't let that
worry you. our population isn't going
70 alop over so long as our medical
colleges continue TO turn out more
than 1000 embryo physicians annu-
ally.
Metropolis weekly gazette. (Metropolis, Ill.) 1???-19??, 1916-01-21
LITTLE BOY WAS DESPERATE
Jack, Completely Out of Patience With
Whole Tribe Of Women, Calls on
Father for Help

Jack disliked being kissed. One
day he was kissed lot. Then. to
make matters worse. on going to the
picture palace In the evening, instead
of his favorite Indian and cowboy
pictures. there was nothing but a lot
more hugglng and kissing. He re
turned home completely ont of pa
thence with the whole tribe of women
After he had been tucked into bed
his mother came TO kiss him good
night
lie refused
Mother begged and begged till at
last, IN disgust, he turned to his
father. who was standing In the door
way. and said;
Daddy, for heavens sake. give this
woman a kissl"
Metropolis weekly gazette. (Metropolis, Ill.) 1???-19??, 1916-01-21
Nigh, Dc Worse.

You see before you" said the mel
ancholy man. "a playthIng of fate"
What's the matter with your"
asked his friend.
II was just about TO mortgage my
house TO buy an automobile. when II
burned down"
'1umph. You've lost your house. but
the chances are you've saved your
neck"
Metropolis weekly gazette. (Metropolis, Ill.) 1???-19??, 1916-01-21
HEAL YOUR SKIN TROUBLES
With cutlcura, the Quick, Sure and
Easy Way. Trial Free

Battle with Cuticura Soap, dry and
apply the Ointment. They stop itch
ing instantly, clear away pimples,
blackheads, redness and roughness, re-
move dandruff and scalp irritation
heal red, rough and sore hands as
well as most baby skin troubles.
Free sample each by mail with Book.
Address postcard, Cuticura, Dept. L,
Boston. Sold everywhere.-Adv.
Metropolis weekly gazette. (Metropolis, Ill.) 1???-19??, 1916-01-21
Gosh. How He breads I'll

when your wife gets the ballot, are
you prepared to accompany her to the
polls?"
mot yet" answered the timorous
man. ''But give me little time. I'm
gradually screwing up my courage to
the sticking point, foi>it is already set
tied that I'm to be her escort"
Metropolis weekly gazette. (Metropolis, Ill.) 1???-19??, 1916-01-21

People say this man could have had
any Office he wanted, but no chose pri
yate life"
Don't you believe that. my son,
said the veteran campaigner. Many
n man gets the credit for refusing ali
political prcfermcnt when. as a matter
Of fact. he merely had sense enough
10 know that he could not get the one
lob he'd set hts heart on"
Metropolis weekly gazette. (Metropolis, Ill.) 1???-19??, 1916-01-21
What We've Come To.

TN the old days when man de-
clared himself Roman citizen no one
dared harm him."
True. And nowadays when trav-
eler in a foreign land says he's an
American citizen. officials in gold braid
seem to think it's some kind OF joke"
Metropolis weekly gazette. (Metropolis, Ill.) 1???-19??, 1916-01-21
NothIna Rut Erowns.

"Frown at the world and 1t frowns
back. Smile. and you get smile in
return
Il dunno about that. I've had that
last part fail to work when trying IL
on a pretty girl"
Metropolis weekly gazette. (Metropolis, Ill.) 1???-19??, 1916-01-21
information.

I'm just beginning to understand
why they label this window 1nforma-
tom. h .y~.
Can you find out what you want
10 known"
NO. But it's a place where you can
always go and inform somebody about
what You happen to nave on your
mind" 3 ~ gs;s@ es
Metropolis weekly gazette. (Metropolis, Ill.) 1???-19??, 1916-01-21
Taking Life Easy.

Flows your son?''
"Finel He's taking life easy since
he graduated" ~
What's he doing?". Is !,
Sticking gigs at the abasscsr. sesl
Metropolis weekly gazette. (Metropolis, Ill.) 1???-19??, 1916-01-21
Meroenarx Motive.

what was the subject of the lee.
turer's address,"
:" Peace at Any Price.
did he prove his lcase?p
mo. The audience was rather small
and he cut out some OF his most elo-
quent periods because he failed to get
his price" 49,
Metropolis weekly gazette. (Metropolis, Ill.) 1???-19??, 1916-01-21
Can't Charge Admission.

"seadson believes In getting his
moneys worth"
He doesn't always succeed. though"
Il thought him rather shrewd"
"Oh, the man who swaps dollars
with him usually pays 20 per cent for
the privilege. but Whenever Mrs. Sead-
son gives a party. SO far as Scadson
Is concerned, It's q dead loss"
Metropolis weekly gazette. (Metropolis, Ill.) 1???-19??, 1916-01-21
pelnyinn the Count.

do you think mirrors will be placed
In voting booths for the woman yoter?"
Il hardly think So" replied the prac-
tical politician. 1T would mean that
every woman voter would spend at
least half an hour in booth and at
that rate an election would require a
week or more"
Metropolis weekly gazette. (Metropolis, Ill.) 1???-19??, 1916-01-21
Mean Of Her.

Naomi-What do you think? Gwen
dolyn positively refuses to give a talk
on Bergson at our club next week.
Diana-What reason did she give2
Naomi-None at ALL Only said she
didn't know anything about Bergson!
Judge. 80 ers
Metropolis weekly gazette. (Metropolis, Ill.) 1???-19??, 1916-01-21

MY REORGANIZATION didu't seem
to worry you much, said the famous
lawyer to the Witness after the trial
.Haye you bad any previous expert
ences" .
Just little" replied the witness
sarcasticaliy. II have six children"
Ladies' Home Journal
Metropolis weekly gazette. (Metropolis, Ill.) 1???-19??, 1916-01-21

Lawson did you think when
you realized that your automobile was
turning turtle the other day?
Dawson-Weil. my 1irst Thought
was; ] am Ia the soup.
Metropolis weekly gazette. (Metropolis, Ill.) 1???-19??, 1916-01-21
Anf Course.

"That fellow is an old grump. He'd
be sour IL You went to him with a
golden opportunity"
well, a golden opportunity ought
to be able to stand a little acid
Metropolis weekly gazette. (Metropolis, Ill.) 1???-19??, 1916-01-21
T,rslssa pebu,an.ss.

How does Fehce pass the time
these daysg"
Oh. she nlrta. dhnces. motors, goifs,
dimes. dabblos-in settlement work. Wis.
it's thestheaters and keeps up an active
membership IN half dozen clubs.
''Umphl And I've beard shop girls
complain OF being tiredH
Metropolis weekly gazette. (Metropolis, Ill.) 1???-19??, 1916-01-21
pacific Ambition.

"caligula wished that Rome had a
single neck. so that he might sever II
at blow.
Times are different Now wish
that ] could build a grapSophone big
enough 10 record tho voice OF the
people"
Metropolis weekly gazette. (Metropolis, Ill.) 1???-19??, 1916-01-21

George. dear, the cook we took
without recommendation has left
u.s."
Il suppose that Is because We are
among the things she didn't consider
OF sufficient value TO take with her."
Metropolis weekly gazette. (Metropolis, Ill.) 1???-19??, 1916-01-21

Wife--Mrs.' Brooks says society is
hollow--that there isn't anything in it.
Husband--Well, there isn't anything
In anything nowadays, my dear, If you
don't put something in it.-Judge.
Metropolis weekly gazette. (Metropolis, Ill.) 1???-19??, 1916-01-21
Reeommendatlon Not Necessary.

Recommendation Not Necessary.
so you're going TO leave as. Mary.
Eyes. mum. ige got to-"
and do you want me to give you a
letter OF recommendation?
"It amt necessary, mum. The man
I'm going TO work for is willing to
take chances. I'm leayin' to get mar
ried.''
Metropolis weekly gazette. (Metropolis, Ill.) 1???-19??, 1916-01-21

Did you see .Yhege western WON.
an has .graphophone going in the
barns at milking titneT'
':svell. l hope they don't play the
tune the old COW died son.'
Metropolis weekly gazette. (Metropolis, Ill.) 1???-19??, 1916-01-21
LOCKING Ahead.

Son, why do you wear your hat
pressed down over your ears?"
That's the style"
Il think you are taking chances in
training your ears to stick out. What
are you going to do when the styles
changer"
Metropolis weekly gazette. (Metropolis, Ill.) 1???-19??, 1916-01-21
WoMAN,s cRowNINo GLORY

is her hair If yours is streaked with
ugly, grizzly, gray hairs, use La Gre
OLE Hail. Dressing and change 1t in
the natural way. Price $1.O0.-Adv.
Metropolis weekly gazette. (Metropolis, Ill.) 1???-19??, 1916-01-21

Mrs. Casser--1 was ,outspoken in my
sentiments at the club this afternoon,
Mr.. Gasser--l can't believe II. Whc
outspoke you, my dear r. Puck
Metropolis weekly gazette. (Metropolis, Ill.) 1???-19??, 1916-01-21
rHls is THE AGE OF YOUTH.

You win Took ten years younger II you
darken' your ugly. grizzly, gray hairs by
using La Creole Hair Dressing ADV.
Metropolis weekly gazette. (Metropolis, Ill.) 1???-19??, 1916-01-21
piles Relieved by First Application

And cured in 10 "A days by PAZo OINTMENT
the universal remedy for all forms OF Piles
Druggists refund money If it fails soc.
Metropolis weekly gazette. (Metropolis, Ill.) 1???-19??, 1916-01-21
SOAP is STRONGLY ALKALINE

and constant use will burn out the
scalp. Cleanse the scalp by shampoo
ing with La Creole Hair Dressins
and darken, in the natural way, those
ugly, grizzly hairs. Price. $1.00.-AdV.
Metropolis weekly gazette. (Metropolis, Ill.) 1???-19??, 1916-01-21
whats that noise "

What's that noise?"
-Four and twenty biackbirds baked
in a pie, your majesty"
Take 'em back TO the chef and tell
him to bake EN- TIL they don't feel
like singing. can't eat rare birds"
Metropolis weekly gazette. (Metropolis, Ill.) 1???-19??, 1916-01-21

DR.. Sven Won Hedin has been elected
a corresponding member of the Vienna
Academy of Sciences.
Metropolis weekly gazette. (Metropolis, Ill.) 1???-19??, 1916-01-21
WistfuI Waiting.
Care much for iishing?'

Care much Tor fshing?'
No. replied the melancholy man.
TITS great sport
Il haven't found It SO. In fact, it
has very bad effect on me-"
'1mpossiblel"
True, nevertheless. Fish seldom
bite fast enough to require my undi-
vided attention and the longer l sit
and watch a cork the more I'm in.
clined to brood over my troubles"
Metropolis weekly gazette. (Metropolis, Ill.) 1???-19??, 1916-01-21
A corpIlIent One.

Its rather curious about the .Gads.
bys."
"Yes?"
Metropolis weekly gazette. (Metropolis, Ill.) 1???-19??, 1916-01-21
They have a family skeleton.

But the funny part about It Is that
the Gadsbys family skeleton is rela-
tive of Mr.. Gadsby, who once travelled
about the country as fat woman in
a side show"
Metropolis weekly gazette. (Metropolis, Ill.) 1???-19??, 1916-01-21

Coda cause Grip Laxative Bromo cuinine 70
moves thc cause. There is only one 'BroraS
Quinine." Z. w. GROVES signature on box. zsc
Metropolis weekly gazette. (Metropolis, Ill.) 1???-19??, 1916-01-21

Just II.
"All | have to say is the fate OF
this experiment hangs on hair"
what a bald statement"
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1916-09-26
MILLER IS FOUND
GUILTY BY JURY ii
ON A CHARGE OF
TIMBER TRESPASS
Ke!liher Man Who Operated Flying
A Dutchman" Accused of Citing
: State Timber.
MILL SEIZED BY
STATE AUTHORITIES
Case Against Michael Haley on Sim
liar Charge Being Taken Up
by the Court.
MILL SEIZED BY
STATE AUTHORITIES

John G. Miller, who operated the
"Flying Dutchman," portable saw
mill near Kelliher, was found guilty
by a jury in the district court last
night on charge of cutting timber
on state lands. The jury was out
for several hours.
The portable mill was seized by
state authorities last spring.
Attorney Charles w. Scrutchin
represented Mr.. Miller in court and
County Attorney Graham M. Torrance
\Qrcsented the case for the state.
Miller is one of the first to be
found guilty of state timber trespass
charges since recent Investigations
made by the state auditors office.
A similar charge against Michael
Haley is being taken up in the dis
trict court before Judge G. w. STAN
ton today. Haley is charged with
taking timber from state lands near
Kelliher. Attorney P. j. Russell is
appearing for him in court. Only
nine jurors were secured up to noon.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1916-09-26
COURT UPH0LDS ACTS
Of STATES ATTORNEY

Chicago, Sept. 26.-Judge LaBuy
in the municipal court late yesterday
declined to issue warrants for the ar
rest of McClay Hoyne, states attor-
ney, and five of his aids, charged by
Charles e. Erbstein with having kid
mapped mis- client, Mrs. Helen Evers,
alleged decoy OF a. blackmailers'
trust, and seeking to force confess
sions from her by third degree meth
DDS.
Mrs. Evers, who was at liberty on
a $4,000 bond, in the federal court
testified that she had been taken
from cafe last Friday, questioned by
attaches of the states attorneys Of
fee and then liberated. Judge LaBuy
decided that she had failed to show
that there had been an attempt to
force a confession from her.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1916-09-26
Bo!RlDERCoUN7Y RI | R l TO
!. SUE FOR $2|o0,000
!. ILLEGAL Il EXPENSES
oFcoUN7Yl u I: .']I| YoFfIclALS l'I)l Fl i!
Attorney in St. Paul Says Effort Will
Be Made to Recover Questioned
Expenditures.
ACTION AGAINST AUDITOR
AND COUNTY COMMISSIONERS
Complaint is in Hands of Sheriff.
Says Attorney; Has Conference
With Governor.

st. Paul, Sept. 6.-Koochiching
county is suing for partial recovery
on allegations of. irregular expendi-
lures of more than 100000 of it's
funds as contained in a recent report
of the state public examiner which
resulted in suspensions of the audi
the governor pending Investigations,
according to N. B. Arnold, a Duluth
attorney, representing the county in
the new civil actions.
Mr.. Arnold arrived in St. Paul to
consult Governor Burnquist on the
proposed suspension of the remaining
board of Koochiching county commits
sioners on charges of malfeasance.
Fraud allegations, the attorney ex-
planned ARE the basis of the civil ac-
tion brought in an effort toward re-
covery by Koochiching county
against former County Auditor J. H.
SlOcum, former Commissioner r. S.
Mcdonald, George A. Elder and J. A.
Duffy, the last two individually and
as agents of the Commercial Invest
ment company and the Farmers Ma
tional bank, formerly the State Bank
of Red Lake Falls, respectively, which
organizations are also made defend
ants" '<~S. - I--'-- >-'-' - -'-! Z +<- ' ~s
The complaint now in the sheriff's
hands for service, Mr.. Arnold said,
recites that prior to January 1, 1916,
Koochiching county authorized the
issuance of $765,000 of IL per cent
county bonds in connection with pro-
jects for eight judicial bitches. 1t
alleges that the defendants "con-
spired together to defraud Koochi-
ching county out of it's money and
property, and as part of such agree
ment," and further that Slocum and
Mcdonald were to use their influence
to bring about the issues and sale of
the bonds to the advantage of the de-
PENDANTS.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1916-09-26
HIGHER PRICES FOR
BINDER TWINE IN 1917

Minneapolis, Sept 26.-Minnesota
farmers will have to pay at least 10
cents per pound for sisal twine for
binding next years crop, according
to members of the state board of con-
troll, who said today that at 81 cents
the state has sold twine too cheaply.
In fact, the state now is unable to
buy any twine at all from the "Regu-
ladOra," as the Yucatan' sisal trust
is called, and has been forced to stock
up to an unusual extent with the
higher priced MANILA fiber.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1916-09-26
Garrison Surrenders and Majority of
Men Join Bandits, Say Juarez
Reports.
ROWING BANDS ARE
OPERATING NEAR BORDER
Three Hundred Men Reported in
Villas Band; Wounded Soldiers
at Juarez.
(By United Press)

Juarez, Mex, Sept. 26-Roving
bands of Mexican bandits are report
ed to be operating within so miles
of the international border.
Several wounded soldiers arrived
here this morning and reported a
battle at Samalyuca, AZ miles south
of this city.
1t is reported that 80 bandits, be-
lieved to have been Villistas, fell
upon the garrison of so de facto SOL
diers at Samalyuca. Part of the
garrison surrendered and joined the
bandits. Those who refused to Join
the bandits and aid them were
slaughtered.
The Bemidji daily pioneer. [volume] (Bemidji, Minn.) 1904-1971, 1916-09-26

Tonight's program at the Rex has
as headliner an exciting drama,
"Getting the CRATER, in which Doris
Grey is featured. Miss Grey will be
remembered as the Boston girl who
was selected to become a screen act
ress from a number of candidates for
that distinction at the moving pic
ture convention in the east, early last
spring. :. Since then she has been un-
der tutelage and now appears in
Thanhouser productions. The Mu-
tual Weekly, news Of the world in
moving pictures showing the latest
fashions, and a comedy are the other
attractions. I. s.