davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-10-05
What the Doctor Knows
KIDNEYS MUST BE RIGHT TO
INSURE HEALTH.

Pew people realize to what extent their
health depends upon the condition of the
kidneys.
The physician in nearly all cases Of
serious illness, makes a chemical analy-
sis of the patients urine. He knows that
unless the kidneys are doing their work
properly, the other organs cannot readily
be brought back to health and strength.
When the kidneys are neglected or
abused in any way, serious results are
sure to follow. According to health sta
%tistics, Bright's Disease, which is really
an advanced form of kidney trouble,
caused nearly ten thousand deaths in one
year, in the State of New York alone.
Therefore, it is particularly necessary to
pay more attention to the health of these
important organs.
An ideal herbal compound that has had
remarkable success as a kidney remedy
is DR.. Kilmer's Swamp-Root, the great
kidney, liver and bladder remedy.
The mild and healing influence of this
preparation, in most cases, is soon real
lied, according to sworn statements and
verified testimony of those who have used
the remedy.
When your kidneys require attention
get Swamp-Root at once from any phar
macy. It is sold by every druggist in
bottles of two sizes-50c and $1.0O.
However, if you wish first to test this
great preparation send ten cents to DR.
Kilmer & Co., Binghamton, N. Y, for {
sample bottle. When writing be sure anC
mention this paper. Adv.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-10-05
Returned Il ALL Rinht.

Over the garden fence the conversa-
ton had suddenly turned acrimonious.
San If yore boy, 'Erbert, ties any
more cans to our pore dogs TAIL" was
Mrs. Moggins' stern ultimatum, cell
ear about it, that's all. oh, an per-
APPS you've done wiz that saucepan
wot you borrowed last Monday"
"'Erbert," asked Mrs. Grub shrilly f;
"wot ave you bin dom to Mrs. Mog-
gins dog?
"Nothin' ma" replied the small boy
unblushingly.
"Therep' said his mother triumph
antly. "An' you returned 'er sauce
pan yesterday, didn't you, dearieT
"Sent it back by 'er dog" said Err
bert calmly.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-10-05

of the value of a bull is the character
of his offspring, and this is the safest
and surest guide. Many aged bulls
with good records and splendid off
spring are sold at bargain prices to
avoid iIbreeding, and afford an excel
lent opportunity to the man who
wishes a good bull at moderate cost.
Strength and virility must go with
coed ancestry to make a good sire.
The grade sire should have no place
in the dairy herd.
Select Cows on Their Records.
Cows may be selected according to
type and apparently by men who are
good judges, but the only safe and sure
basis for selection is the annual milk
record.
The keeping of milk records in all
parts of the country and in all classes
and kinds of herds has shown:
/. That some herds make large an
nual profits while others make none.
2. That in the best herds there are
usually some Improbable cows, and
very many such in the poorer herds.
3. That without records the owners
of the herds could not tell with any de-
gree of accuracy which cows We're pay
ing p~rofitably and which were not.
! 4. That many dairymen would have
made a greater yearly profit had they
sent their herd to the butcher at the
beginning of the year, thus saving halt
their feed and labor expenses and get
ting all the profit from their best cows
A fact worth noting is that several
worlds record COWS of different breeds
now worth thousands of dollars each
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-10-05

ment to make certain it is spoHess and free from the slightest fmperfecton.
If he discovered one edge prorudng even an eentsyteentsy bit beyond the
others 1t would make him unhappy But if his Workmanship seems to be all
right he carefully ticks the flap O.. the envelope, taking pains to see that
every particle of the muciage is moistened.
He seals the envelope with great care and that brings him to the delicate
task of putting on the stamp.
None of your lopsdedly stamped envelopes for Oscar. He takes enough
time to insure having the stamp in perfect pumbIne with the end of the
envelope-and. then proceeds panTakngy to the folding of the next letter.
If he is free from Interruptions Underwood can fold from 10 to Is letters
way he gains a great deal of time for affairs of state.
Neatness is just is much a part of the Underwood makeup as his calm
ness. And the only thing that might YER rume that calmness would be a
lack of neatness. Once in a while one of his office force will hurriedly crumple
up a piece of waste paper and fire it at the waste basket-and miss. If
Underwood happens to b re at his desk and sees the piece of crumped paper on
the floor, he will quietly and unostentatiousy go and pick it up and place
it in the basket
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-10-05

11S and would get so weak at times that
] fell over. I began to take Lydia 3.
Pinkham's Vegetable Compound, and
ten days later I could eat and it did not
hurt my stomach. I have taken the
medicine ever since and I feel like o
new woman. Inow weigh 127 pounds
10 you can see what it has done for me
already. My husband says ne knows
your medicine has saved my life. =
Mrs. J. s. BARLOW, 1924 South 4th ST.,
Columbus, Ohio.
Lydia E. Pinkham's Vegetable Com
pound contains just the virtues Of roots
and herbs needed to restore health and
strength to the weakened organs of the
body. That is why Mrs. Barlow, q
chronic invalid, recovered so completely.
It pays for women suffering from any
female ailments to insist upon having
Lydia e. Pinkham's Vegetable Com
pound.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-10-05

cases the stations are being relocated at points easily seen by the officers of
approaching o. passing ships. The new stations are being installed in tall,
specially constructed steel towers, dozens of which are being erected along the
shores of the five lakes and their connecting waterways.
The taller towers will make possible the establishment of the new signal
system in which three lights one above the other, will be used instead of the
two lights in a vertical plane heretofore employed.
The new system was worked out after experiments carried on by the
instrument experts of the weather bureau on the Potomac below Washington
under various weather conditions. These experiments brought out the fact
that lights, to be seen by the naked eye as separate bright objects, must be
approximately four feet apart for each mile the observer is distant This
information was made use of in designing the new towers and in arranging
the placement of the signal lamps. At the same time the instrument experts
experimental with various lights and decided to make use of electric bulbs
of the new gas-fled type to increase still further the efficiency of the newly
equipped stations.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-10-05

H5 uIHUSI CFNy NdpIdI Ugh
is a line Of trees, some common, other imported varieties. By noticing these
one soon acquires a deeper interest And then the real holidays come when
the woods are sought and truly inspiring lessons are learned in the real outof-
doors of nature.
The tree families are well represented here. The deciduous varieties,
meaning those which shed their leaves, are especially abundant Of course, the
oaks are in manifold numbers-the Spanish, pin, Single, black jack, swamp
white, red, black, bur, post and white. These are everywhere and they have
a venerable history
The naples have taken a hold on Washfngtons fancy and elms, gums,
and many less familiar trees are numerous here.
To many people the chief charm of the woods and fields lies in the multi
tudes of wild flowers that are to be found. Washington may deem itself
fortunate in having a bountful supply. Their names are legion, and it is an
impossible task to cover the list. One Of the difficulties of such a list is that
many of the flowers found in the woods have escaped from some garden, and
though they are found apparently uncultvated they cannot be called wild
flowers; on the other hand, many of the originals of the perfected garden
flowers are trailing there in their simple loneliness and the list is about evened.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-10-05
oblialna.

Mrs. Simmons was rather taken
aback by learning hat her new do
mestic's name was the same as her
W daughters.
"Your name, Katherine. and my
daughters being the same makes mat
tiers somewhat confusing" said Mrs.
Simmons. Suppose we change it,"
"Oi don't moind, num-" replied the
girl.
That's very NICE" said the mistress.
How do you like, say, the name of
Bridget?'
well, num-" returned the domestic,
sits not mesilf that's W particular.
Dim willing to call tn young lady ony
name ye'd Suggest, num-"
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-10-05
Automatically Speaking.

Tommy Ito Jock, on leave)-What
about the lingo? Suppose you want
an egg over there, what do you say2
Jock-Ye just say, "Oof."
Tommy--But suppose you want two2
Jock-Ye say 'Twa oofs," and the
silly auld fule wife gies We three, and
We just gle her back one. Man, it's
an awful easy language.-Punch.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-10-05
Looked Comical,

Mrs. Flatbush-And you laughed
when you saw your husband in his sol
der clothes?
Mrs. Bensonhurst-Yes; you ought
to have seen him.
"But / should think you would have
cried"
swell, | done that too; l laughed
till | cried"
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-10-05

kle forth from hundreds of special
storm-warning stations of the weather
bureau, combined in such a way as to
furnish navigators with specific infor-
nation that will forearm them.
One interesting fact is that the
mushroomlike growth of many lake
ports, bringing into existence cities
with their myriads of lights, obscured
numbers of the stations that when es-
tablished were the most outstanding
fnntrrnc Of tho ninhf uinm In c1lnh
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-10-05
At a Disadvantage,

"Have any trouble with your summer
boarders this year?"
"No," answered Mr.. Cobbles. THAT
is, none worth mentionin'. There was
a lady school teacher stayin' with us
who didn't seem to think much Of my
grammar, but as / wasn't chargin' moth
in for my grammar, she couldn't come
right out and make no regular COM
plant"
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-10-05
important 70 Mothers
Fond of an Argument.

II dare say the time passed rather
quickly for old Mr.. Rasper at the sum-
mer resort he visited"
"Plenty to amuse him, eh?" q
"Yes-in a way. He met another
old codger there as contentious as he
was and when the two of them locked
horns they forgot whether it was
morning, noon or night"
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-10-05
The Ruling Passion.

"Who are those gentlemen having
lunch together?"
"a party Of scientists"
Il don't suppose a low-browed indi-
vidual could understand what they are
talking about"
HE might. l overheard one of them
just now ask the waiter if there vas
a ball game today"
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-10-05

dragging sensation across my loins,
difficulty in collecting my thoughts
and was troubled with short
ness of breath. Dodds Kidney Pills
have cured me of these complaints.
You are at liberty to publish this let
ter for the benefit of any sufferer who
doubts the merit of Dodds Kidney
Pills"
Dodds Kidney Pills, SOC. per box at
your dealer or Dodds Medicine Co.,
Buffalo, N. Y, Dodds Dyspepsia Tab
lets for Indigestion have been proved.
SOC. per box.-Adv.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-10-05
Didn't Want Much,

One Saturday night a lady who pos
sessed a fruit and vegetable shop hur-
ried to serve her last customer, a very
red-faced woman
She asked for a penny's worth of
vegetables, and wanted a piece Of ev-
erything.
When she had been given what she
desired, she politely asked If they
could be wrapped in a piece of paper
and tied with a string.
The shopkeeper turned to her, quite
calm, and said:
"Wait a minute, and 1 will run
across to the butchers for a bone,
and l think that will complete your
Sunday dinner" +
/
Guatemala has 1899 public schools.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-10-05

ties IN ones mind is a %stupendous feat,
but once accomplished, it leads ever
onward. Most people have a good
nucleus for plant knowledge around
which to accumulate more. The love
of nature seems implanted within the
human heart. There is no denying that
things out of doors call irresistibly.
And tree students, it is said, become as
enthusiastic as bird students.
The streets of Washington are the
rightful places for beginners. Border
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-10-05
An Eve to Business.

"This play is the worst ever. l am
going to demand my money back"
'Wai until after the next act, old
man. Ten years elapse between acts
1 and 3, and you can demand interest
on your money for that length of
time"
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-10-05
Gull Out Improbable Cows.
Overcome Summer Drawbacks.

Make early preparations for over
coming the great drawbacks to mid
summer dairying, viz: Flies, excessive
heat, and dry, short pasturage. Con-
quer or materially mitigate these in
nuences, and-you are a successful
dairyman!
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-10-05
PLENTY OF CHICKENS IN LONDON.

London.-Lord Selbornes advice to householders in urban areas to produce
their own eggs In war time is hardly needed in the suburbs Of London near and
far. This year the economic policy Of feeding a few good layers in the
garden is being extensively adopted. The henrun, however, without Chan
ucleer is unpopular. Profits are increased when the mother bird is allowed
the JOY and pride Of maternity by Matching a brood of valuable chickens. The
disturbance to neghbors accruing from Chandeliers salute to the rising sun
is mininked by daylight saving which throws the risers back nearer to the
dawn. It's only q sieepless Carlyle who sets the police upon ChanHceer, and
the Caryes are rare .
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-10-05

IMITATION is slNcEREsT FLATTERY
but like counterfeit money the imita~
ton has not the worth Of the original.
Insist on LA Creole Hair Dressing
it's the original. Darkens your hair in
the natural way, but contains no dye.
Price $1.00.-Adv.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-10-05

refreshing. I felt
heavy and sleepy
after meals, was
always
and tired, had a
bitter taste in my
mouth, was dizzy,
h a d fl oatin 6
specks before my
eyes, was always
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-10-05
Not Serious Defect.

Grasshoppers damage field and gar
den crops, and fruit and shade trees.
Poison bran mash sowed early in the
morning kills them, and their eggs may
be destroyed by c%ultivating pastures,
meadows and waste lands in the late
fall.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-10-05

earth from the vast outer world.
In the collection shown in the new
building Of the National museum in
this city is a remarkably fine exhibit
of meteorltes. 1t includes complete me-
teorites ranging in size from the
merest pebbles to great bowlderlike
masses, and casts reproducing giant
forms like that of Bacubirito, which
has been estimated to weigh % tons,
and still rests where 1t fell in Mexico.
The National museum has recently
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-10-05
COVETED BY ALL

but possessed by few-a beautiful
head of hair. If yours is streaked with
gray, or is harsh and stiff, you can re-
store it to its former beauty and lus-
ter by using La Creole Hair Dress
ing. Price $1.00.-Adv.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-10-05

a letter ~carelessly folded than he
would wear the same collar all week.
First he folds the sheet over, matches
the right down to an infin-
itesimal fraction of a hairs breadth,
and carefully creases the paper in the
middle. Then comes the most difficult
part. He must determine, just with
his eye, how to make three additional
folds, each one of exactly the same
size. Having done that, Underwood
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-10-05

female troubles and
nervousness. I had
a pain in my right
side and could not
eat anything with
out hurting my
stomach. I could
not drink cold water
at all nor eat any
kind of raw fruit,
nor fresh meat nor
chicken. From 178
noI1nda 7 went tn
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-10-05
Avoid Hot Axles.

Axles that get hot and dry not only
wear the wagon out, but they take hay
from the NOW and grain from the bin.
Ask the horses IL this Is not so.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-10-05

THIS is THE AGE OF YOUTH.
You will look ten years younger if you
darken your ugly. grizzly, gray hairs by
using ia Creole" Hair Dressing ADV.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-10-05
Wrono Time o. Year.

"That fellow seems excited about
something"
Eyes. He was born in Kansas and
this is the first time he has ever seen
the ocean,"
"Umph! He must be a stupid cuss
to wait until the bathing season is
nearly over before coming to take a
look at it,"
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-10-05

British Columbia's estimated 1915
revenue is $5,944,015; expenditures,
$11, 100000.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-10-05

issue q handbook and descriptive catalogue of the meteorte collection in
the museum, written by DR.. George P. Merrill, head curator of geology.
Although meteorites have presumably fallen since time immemodal, a
great deal of skeptidsm was felt at first by both the popular and scientific
minds regarding the possibilities Of stones falling from space. So great was
this skepdcism that the examples preserved in the public museums were
once hidden or discarded, the custodians fearing to make laughing stocks of
Themselves NN
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-10-05
How Oscar Underwood Folds and Stamps a Letter

ONE of the funny sights of Washington is Senator Oscar Underwood in the
" act of folding up a letter. Underwood is a nan greatly prejudtced in
favor of neatness, not only in his personal appearance but in everything he
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-10-05
Feedlna VesseIa for caIves.

The young calves should be fed from
buckets as clean as those used In
handling the milk for human consump-
ton.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-10-05
Collection of Meteorites in National Museum

I N CONSIDERING the wonders of the universe, have you ever realized how
! conspicuous among them ire the meteortes, those wonderful messages,
dropped from the sky, for one to wonder at and study? They are the only
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-10-05

were sold to their present owners for
small sums by men who had not taken
the trouble to find out what kind of
COWS they were keeping.
Essential to Keep Records.
1t is difficult, therefore, to see how a
dairyman can afford to run the risk
of keeping improbable COWS by refus-
ing to keep records. A merchant who
could not take time to keep books
would soon go bankrupt; and business
methods must be the rule on the dairy
farm if a profitable business is to be
built up. Even if it should take one
weeks work in a year to keep a good
system of records, the time will be well
spent if the work of the year were to
result in an annual profit of $1,715, OF
a loss of $3.50 as a consequence Of
keeping records or not keeping them.
The time required is really very small.
The milk record is the dairyman's
barometer; by means of it he can keep
checked up on his Individual cows, OF
his mixers and on his system Of feed
ing. BY means of it he will notice any
increase or decrease in milk flow, and
in the latter east be able to avoid trou-
BILE by removing the cause. More inter-
est is taken in feeding the cowsseare-
fully when their records are kept. A
| circular balance scale and a sheet Of
paper ruled off, together with the Bah
cock test will do the work. Cow test
ing associations are doing good work
all over the country. From ten to
twenty or more farmers may club to-
gether and agree to pay a qualified
man to test their herds each month,
sharing expenses equally. The system
is particularly valuable to the men
with purebred herds, as they can get
their good animals tested for the adj
vanced register. Record keeping helps
the dairyman to get rid of his rob
ber."
Gull Out Improbable Cows.
Cows that prove Improbable should
be sold at once. Those paying only q
small profit may be kept until better
ones are bought or raised to take their
places. Young heifers that do not
show up during their first lactation
period may sometimes make a good
showing on a second years trial. Good
cows can often be purchased that will
pay for their feed, care and cost prices
in one year and return a good prof
besides.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-10-05
A GRATEFUL ACKNOWLEDGEMENT.

Mr.. F. c. Case of Welcome Lake,
Pa, writes: Il suffered with Back
ache and Kidney Trouble. My head
ached, my sleep was broken and un-
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-10-05
Good Hunting Ground for the Amateur Botanist

T HE environs of Washington are an excellent hunting ground for the
] amateur botanst, for they re full of varieties of plants-trees, shrubs,
wild flowers, MOSES and ferns. To hold eve the eommonest of these varie-
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-10-05

More than $4,000 women are en-
ployed in the hardware industry in
ENGLAND.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-10-05

Experts consider that one great
qualification wOman munition workers.
possess is patience.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-10-05
g. RATIONALE
ApITAL AFfAIpS
Uncle Sans Lights That Signal Storm Warnings

IA ASHNGTON-Unee Sans lighthouse service is not the only one of his
w agencies that display lights at night for the information and welfare
of the mariner. Whenever a storm is brewing along the coasts Or over the
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-10-05

John Rebow of Wilkes-Barre, Pa.
nus adopted 90 orphans. He has seven
children Of his own.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-10-05
The STYLE of II.

Read my palm, please"
"Ah, you want a hand-picked fu-
ture, do your"
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-10-05

For administering medicine o a horse an inventor has patented a hollow,
perforated bit with a funnel at one end.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-10-05
after SIX YEARS
OF SUFFERING
Woman Made Well byLydia
Il z. Pinkham's Vegetable
Compound.

Columbus, Ohio. -'I had almost given
up. / had been sick for six years with