davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Judsonia weekly advance., 1916-11-22

They're helpless critters, too. Ain't got as much gumption about them as chicken. And frail--let me tell you, young man, that turkey is the great est natural-born invalid in the world. They have to be watched every minute or the first thing you know they'll up and die on you without seconds warning.
 T been raisin' turkeys for years and years-had good luck with 'em. too. But I reckon I don't understand more than half about them. Nobody does-particularly why the Creator, when he made 'em. didn't give 'em minds"
 Docs that apply to wild turkeys as we'll as the tame ones?" asked the re- porter.
 The old man spat thoughtfully and profusely at chip of wood in the street. He hit the mark.
 'As to that" he said, q can't exact ly say. "Mebbe there's something in the idea that turkey, when he's tame, gets so used to hayin' folks make q fuss over him that he jest naturally loses all his ambition. There's one thing certain-if every wild turkey was as big fool as some that I've raised there wouldn't be live wild turkey in the United States within a year" Washington Star.
Judsonia weekly advance., 1916-11-22
NOT MUCH OF A SCANDAL
Inquisitive Neighbours High Hopes of Juicy MorseI of Gossip Came
 to Nothing.

An inquisitive neighbor who has an inordinate fondness for gossip recent ly overheard the little daughter of an acquaintance talking about affairs in her home that seemed to have a spicy smack.
 What was that you said, AlbertaY she inquired.
 q was talking about papa and man. ma."
 "Yes-"
 "And I said papa beat mamma up the other day"
 Did he, indeed?"
 "Yes, he did"
 "Well, what did he beat her with?' With an alarm clock"
 "Ah, did your papa hit your mamma with the clock?"
 'No, indeed, my papa never hits my mammal"
 "Then what do you mean when you say he beat her up the other morn- ingY'
 Mamma usually gets up first, but papa wanted to go fishing, and he set the clock so he could beat her up in the morning"
 "Oh-h-h-h-h-h !''-Youngstown Tele- gram.
Judsonia weekly advance., 1916-11-22
 Enemy of the Cranberry.

An enemy which would rob the Thanksgiving table of cheap cranher- ries is the cranberry root worm, and the government has been attempted to circumvent this destroyer, too. Ex- perts of the department of agriculture have found that by stimulating the growth of the plants with fertilizers practice that has not been followed in the past-the ravages of this or dinarily destructive creature can be made almost negligible.
Judsonia weekly advance., 1916-11-22
OF INTEREST TO MOTHERS

The cost of food today is serious matter to all of you. To cut down your food bills and at the same time improve the health of your family, serve them Skinner's Macaroni and Spaghetti two or three times per week. Children love it and thrive on it. It is the best possible food for adults. Write the Skinner Mfg. Co.,, Omaha, Nebr., for beautiful cook book telling how to serve it in a hundred ways. It's free to every mother-Adv.
Judsonia weekly advance., 1916-11-22
Foolish Man.

A New Jersey man frustrated a foot pad by hitting him over the head with a paper sack of eggs. A man will do incredibly foolish things when he is frightened. What could he have been carrying more valuable than the eggs he ed?-Cleveland Plain Dealer
Judsonia weekly advance., 1916-11-22
RED CROSS SERVICE.

Red Cross Ball Blue gives to every housewife unequaled service. A large 5 cent package gives more real, gen uine merit than any other blue. Red Cross Ball Blue makes clothes winter than snow. You will be delighted. At all good grocers.-Adv.
Judsonia weekly advance., 1916-11-22
PREPARED
 By DOUGLAS MALLOCH

We may be shy ot cannon and we may be short of guns, We may not have as many men as many
 other ones, We may require fort or two, some infan- try and horse, A little more artillery to back them up, of course; But in one matter we have not a reason to be scared For, when it comes to pumpkin pies. we surely are preparedl We may be short of men of war and shy of submarines And low in mines and other subterranean machines; We ought to have an aeroplane, or, maybe two or three, To nest among the mountainous or hydro plane the sea; We haven't any instruments for shootini poisoned gas But we can beat the universe at making apple sass! We have the pumpkins and we have the pippins big and fine; And, if you want preparedness, pie-par- edness for mine! If someone sails across the sea America to try, Wen shoot them full of apple sass and full of pumpkin pie. bet they'll .hYow their guns away beneatl. that magic charm, And settle in America and buy them each farml A>>>>>~~~~~s~~~~~
Judsonia weekly advance., 1916-11-22
Briefly Explained.

'Why have you named this corn the jackrabbit variety?"
 Long ears" Louisville Courier Journal
Judsonia weekly advance., 1916-11-22

Turkeys derived their name from the fact that they were imported first into Europe through Turkey.
Judsonia weekly advance., 1916-11-22
A Thanksoivind.

For days of hedith for nights of quiet sleep; for seasons of bounty and of beauty, for all earth's contri- buttons to our need through this past year: good Lord, we thank thee.- William Gannett.
Judsonia weekly advance., 1916-11-22
COVETED BY ALL

but possessed by few-a beautiful head of hair. If yours is streaked with gray, or is harsh and stiff, you can re- store 1t to it's former beauty and Jus ter by using La Creole" Hafr Dress. ing. Price $1.00.-Adv.
Judsonia weekly advance., 1916-11-22
About Finished.

'I saw that pretty girl smile at you in puzzled way, as if she thought she might have met you somewhere"
 "Yes. We were almost engaged at the seashore last summer"
 "Ah!"
 'The smile you saw was the flag end of June flirtation''
Judsonia weekly advance., 1916-11-22
Their Identity.

"Who are the central powers, pop?"
 "They are the beings behind voice, my son, who after you have sent in your call and waited for 15 minutes by your watch, say languidly: What number did you sayY"
Judsonia weekly advance., 1916-11-22
Quite So.

"The men behind this street-sprin- kling system are paradoxical set" How sop
 'They propose to raise the dust by laying it."
Judsonia weekly advance., 1916-11-22

Dr. Pierce's Favorite Prescription make weak women strong, sick women well, nt alcohol. Sold in tablets or hquid.-Adv.
Judsonia weekly advance., 1916-11-22

pr. B. F. Jackson, Celebrated Physician, handed down to posterity his famous prescription for female troubles. Now sold under the name of "Femenina." Price 50c and $1.00.-Adv.
Judsonia weekly advance., 1916-11-22

Let no man talk of freedom until he is sure he can govern himself.- Goethe.
Judsonia weekly advance., 1916-11-22

Chinese athletes believe duck brain to be the most strengthening food.
Judsonia weekly advance., 1916-11-22

night, irritation, sediment, etc.
 Lack of control, smarting. uric acid. dizziness, indigestion, sleeplessness, nerv- otsness, sometimes the heart acts badly, rheumatism, bloating, lack of ambition, may be loss of flesh, sallow complexion.
 Prevalency of Kidney Disease.
 Most people do not realize the alarm ing increase and remarkable prevalency of kidney disease. While kidney dis orders are among the most common diseases that prevail, they are sometimes the last recognized by patients, zUho z,ery often content fhemselves zOitA doctor ing tAe e6eets, zOltize the original disease may constantly undermine the system.
 Regular ffty-cent and one-dollar size bottles at all drug stores.
 Don't make any mistake, but remember the name, Dr. Kilmer's SwampRoot, and the address, Binghamton. N. Y., which you will find on every bottle.
 nple size bottle of Swamp-Root by enclosing ,n, N. Y. This gives you the opportunity licine. They will also send you book of the thousands of grateful letters received Swamp-Root to be just the remedy needed 9 value and success of Swamp-Root are SO send for a sample size bottle. Address Dr. Triting be sure and mention this paper
Judsonia weekly advance., 1916-11-22

Put yourself in your enemy's place and you will stop abusing him.
Judsonia weekly advance., 1916-11-22
GOSsIPING OVER THE PHONE
Many Women, in Their Enjoyment of Friendly Chat, Forget the
 Rights of Others.

Women do not meet and mingle to the extent that men do. At work or at home, they do not have the oppor- tunities for visiting. Housewives, es- pecially, suffer from bottledup social instincts. The most affable husband cannot be engaged ill serious cOnversa- ton on many topics which are of as much interest to a wife as bowling score, the home teams pitching pros poets or behavior of the real estate market, are to a man and his cronies.
 So the habit of prolonged gossiping over the telephone brings about a serious problem in service. The tele- phone company has arranged cal culating supervision of telephone con- versations, instructing operators to break in on those that monopolize party-line systems which other sub- scribers are squirming to make use of.
 An important male, trying to sum- mon cab to catch train, Overhears a fragment of after-dinner telephone conversation between pair of estim- able maidens or matrOnS and becomes, for the moment, violent antagonist of the movement for wOman's equality. The telephone company, seeking to justify it's demand for heavier tolls and to answer bitter criticism of it's service, decides to strike at the heart to-heart communications which vibrate over the wires for many precious mo- ments while the matter-of-fact public gnashes it's teeth.-Detroit News.
Judsonia weekly advance., 1916-11-22
DO YOU GET UP WITH A LAME BACK ]?
Have You Rheumatism, Kidney, Liver or
 Bladder Trouble?

Pain or dull ache in the back is often evidence of kidney trouble. It IS Natures timely warning to show you that the track of health is not clear.
 Danger Signals.
 If these danger signals are unheeded more serious yesnlts may be expected; !; kidney trouble in ks worst form may steal upon you.
 Thousands of people have testified that the mild and immediate effect of Swamp Root, the great kidney, liver and bladder remedy, is soon realized-that it stands the highest for it's remarkable curative effect in the most distressing cases. If you need . medicine, you should have the best.
 lame Back.
 Lame back is only one of many symp- toms of kidney trouble. Other symp- toms showing that you may need Swamp Root are being subject to embarrassing and frequent bladder troubles day and
Judsonia weekly advance., 1916-11-22
Its Conditions.

"A candle is very contradictory thing"
 ''How sop
 Tt is both light affair and cere- ous matter"
Judsonia weekly advance., 1916-11-22

Britain has so,94s Red Cross work
Keowee courier. [volume] (Pickens Court House, S.C.) 1849-current, 1916-05-17
GOVERNAlENT AERO MET FATE

Washington. May 1.-The hydro
aeroplane FL, said to have been the
largest flying boat in America, and
with which }. G.. Maccauley recently
established several speed and endur-
ance records, was wrecked in the Po-
tomac river, near Mount Vernon, to-
day with a probable loss Of two lives
and serious injuries to Maccauley
and the two other persons aboard.
The craft lost propeller while re-
turning at great speed from Washing
ton to the Atlantic coast aeronauti-
cal station at Newport News and
plunged 100 feet into the river, turn
ing over three times in it's descent
and collapsing after it struck the wa
ter.
Louis krantZ, mechanician, and
Chas. A. Good. OF Elyria, Ohio, a stu
dent aviator, could not be found and
have been given up as lost. Maccau-
ley and Philip Utter, a mechanician,
with Dudley Mayo, a Washington
newspaper man, who was a passen-
ger, were rescued by a tug. Utter
was picked up unconscious, while
Maccauley was badly hurt. Both
were taken to a hospital and neither
was able to tell tonight exactly what
happened. Mayo suffered from shock
and was also sent to a hospital.
The HI was only recently COM
pleted at the Newport News station
and had made trial flights last month.
EARLY in May it broke a record for
speed and distance travelled, and la
ter smashed it's own record with
flight to baltimore.
The vessel weighed about three
tons and was propelled by two screws
driven by two motors Of 160-horse
power each. 1t had attained a speed
of more than one hundred miles an
hour,
Keowee courier. [volume] (Pickens Court House, S.C.) 1849-current, 1916-05-17
MY FAMOUS STALLION will be at

MY FAMOUS STALLION will be at
the Shook Livery Stables in Walhalla
every Saturday until further notice.
Stock raisers will do we'll to avail
themselves Of this oportunity to raise
good colts. My animal will commend
himself to any Judge OF good stock.
He Is best known as tho Pickleslmer
Horse; native North Carolina raised.
Any particulars gladly given. J. f..
HEDDEN, West Union, s. C. 18-tf.
Keowee courier. [volume] (Pickens Court House, S.C.) 1849-current, 1916-05-17

FOR SALE-Good mare, years
old. and good mule, same age, weight
each about thousand pounds; High
Point single buggy, good as new;
2M Studebaker wagon. Terms to
suit purchaser. OSCAR II. DEATON,
Walhalla, Route 2. 19-tf.
Keowee courier. [volume] (Pickens Court House, S.C.) 1849-current, 1916-05-17
Rural Credits Passed by House

Washington, May 15.-The Glass
rural credits bill, providing for a
Federal farm loan board and a sys-
TEN Of twelve land banks, passed the
House late to-day by vote Of 295
to 10. A similar measure already
has passed the Senate and the differ
ences probably will be worked out
soon in conference.
Keowee courier. [volume] (Pickens Court House, S.C.) 1849-current, 1916-05-17
/. O. O. F

Oconce Lodge, No. Oh, Independ-
ent Order Of Odd Fellows, will meet
Tuesday Night, May 23, 1910,
at o'clock.
Representatives to Grand Lodge
will make report.
Visiting Odd Fellows welcomed.
HARRY II. HUG1IS, n. &.
ANTON GERBER, Secretary. ad.
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1916-06-22

confident that the best traditions of
America will be maintained under his
administration.
In taking this position Colonel
Roosevelt abandons none of the prin-
ciples for which he stood in 1912, or
has since advocated. In the present
position of the Republican party the
reforms not yet accomplished which
the Progressives set out to obtain can
be accomplished better by working
with them than fighting without the
ranks.
These views, he believes, will be ac-
ceptable to the committee, the major
ity of which has been IN touch with
him and expressed It's approval di-
rectly or through proxies.
Powerful Document
Members of this committee> who
know the general terms of the Colonel,
say that 1t is one of the strongest
documents that ever came from his
pen. 1t is particularly strong, they
say, in its arraignment of President
Wilson and his policies of his admin
istration, but, above all, they say, it is
call to the American people to get
together, forget their differences of
the past and make common cause
against dangers of hyphenates at home
and possible enemies abroad.
Emphasis, they say. is also laid upon
the needs for economic preparedness
against the depression which is GER
tain to follow the end of the war in
Europe if the American people are to
avoid the worst hard times in the his
tory of the nation.
All these, it is maintained, can be
had only from an administration
which stands for everything that
President Wilson has not practiced; ;
therefore, to do otherwise than to
exert every effort to insure his defeat,
it is maintained, would be unpatriotic,
and the end fraught with grave dan
gers
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1916-06-22
Rub Out Rheumatism
with
.WONDEROIL
Stiff Joints Loosen Up Like Magic;
Lumbago Relieved Over Night

Antiseptic Wonderoil draws all the
painful stiffness, soreness and swelling
from rheumatic joints, and does it so
surely and speedily it seems almost
like magic. 1t takes little more than a
25-cent box bought from George A.
Gorgas or any leading dealer here in
Harrisburg to prove it in almost every
case.
First heat Wonderoil, then rub in
gently and bind up with flannel. 1t
never just drives pain from one spot
to another, but draws it right out of
the body.
Wonderoil is a physicians prescip-
tion and has been in successful use for
over so years. 1t is pure and anti
septic. 1t never blisters and is pleas
ant to use. A generous sample will be
sent on request by NJ. E. Raymond,
Inc, Ballston Spa, n. Y.
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1916-06-22
ASTHMA
Simple Harmless Remedy Brings Quick
Relief. Makes Breathing Easy

Many cases of immediate relief and
rapid recovery from Bronchial Asthma
of long standing and other diseases
of throat and lungs are being credited
to discovery made by DIR. Eugene
Howard, of Worcester, Mass. DIR, How
ards prescription, which is totally diff
ferent from all usual methods of treat
ment for these Affections, is called oxi-
daZe and comes in the form of a tablet
which the patient allows to dissolve
slowly in the mouth Its curative,
healing juices thus mingle with the
saliva and enter every ,crevice of the
irritated bronchial membranes, release
the muscular construction of the bron-
chial tubes. open up the air passages
and regulate the spasmodic lung action.
These tablets, though pleasant to the
taste, are so powerful and rapid in their
action that many users who for years
We're obliged to sit up in bed gasping
for breath and unable to sleep report
that they now put a single Oxidaze tab
let in their mouth when going to bed
and can then lie down and breathe cas-
lily and naturally and get good nights
restful sleep. q. A. Gorgas and many
other local druggists who handle Oxi-
daze tablets sell 1t on the positive guar
antee of money back If 1t does not give
Immediate relief.-Advertiseme
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1916-06-22
WITHOUT MOTHER

It's awful lonesome at our house
'Thout Mother;
It's just as quiet as a mouses
'Thout Mother.
An Father looks so lonely there
OF evenins, sittin' in his chair;
1t just amt cheerful anywhere
'Thout Mother!
It's awful hard to get along
'Thout Mother
1t seems like everything goes wrong
'Thout Mother.
Course, Father does the best he can
But then, you know, he's just a man.
An don't know how to fix an plan
Like Mother.
Seems like l don't enjoy my play
'Thout Mother;
Things just get worser every day
'Thout Mother!
There's no one now to mend my doll,
Nobody's sorry when I fall
Oh, home Just amt no place at all
'Thout Mother.
But Father says we must be brave
'Thout Mother,
Cause him an me. we only have
One mother.
An If we're brave, an strong, an true,
An good, just like she told us to,
Well go up Home, when life is thrgh,
Well go up Home, when life is
through.
To Mother.
Galbraith, in The Christian
Herald
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1916-06-22
SOUNDS DEATH
KNELL OF MOOSE
[Continued From First Page]

Continued From FIRST PaReJ
quent grave risks to the national life
of the United States.
For the Progressive party and the
course ii has followed since its birth,
four years ago, Colonel Roosevelt has
neither excuses, explanations nor
apologies. 1t came into being, he
holds at a time when the Republican
party had become the party of reac-
ton and ceased to be the party or
Lincoln and the plain people.
In the four years that have elapsed
the Republicans have come back to the
ancient landmarks, have enacted into
laws in the several States many of the
most important reforms for which the
Progressives stood and have placed
their candidate upon a platform to
which every Progressive can subscribe,
the Colonel contends.
No Reason to Remain Out
The Progressive yeast having thus
leavened the entire Republican lump,
there is no reason, he in substance
says, why for the sake of party name
or personal pride those who left the
Republican party to protest against
Bourbonism should not now return
and make common cause against what
he believes is a national menace.
So far as Justice Hughes is con-
cerned, Colonel Roosevelt's endorse
ment is unqualified, he finding in him
candidate whom he believes every
man, regardless of former political
creed or racial origin, can support,
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1916-06-22

rIESI rage
diana vcounty, and New Alexandria
and Export in Westmoreland county
At Williamsburg monument is to be
erected from the funds provided by
public subscription. The details of
this monument will be worked out at
a meeting of the governors, to be held
in Philadelphia within a few days.
Branch route from Harrisburg to
Washington passes through either
Gettysburg or Chambersburg. The
Reading cutoff to New York will
ouch Allentown and Easton.
The official marker will be a blue
keystone on a white background in
scribed with the letters wv. Penn"
w. l.. Plack, of Philadelphia, partici-
pated in the governors conference
William Jennings, of Harrisburg, pres
ident, presided.
The Pennsylvania Railroad will fill
in for mile and half the old canal
route near Speeceville, Dauphin coun-
ty.
The following honorary members of
the association were elected: Gov
ernor Martin G. Brumbaugh, Senators
Boise Penrose and George T. Oliver;
William Penn, Terre Haute Ind. !:
E. M. Book Philadelphia; Lewis A.
Park, Pittsburgh, and f. ]. Stackpole,
Harrisburg.
The following governors were pres
ent: William Jennings, Harrisburg,
president OF the Association; DR..
Joseph d. Findley, Altoona; W. l..
Plack, Philadelphia; Senator William
Manbeck, Cifflin; James Macklin, Nc
Neytown; e. NJ. c. Africa, Hunting
don; David Barry, Johnstown, treas
urer; Frank NJ. Gran, BlairsviIle; B.
Fl. Jackson, Williamsburg; ]. w. Dona-
hey, Pittsburgh, and j. G. H. Ripp-
man, Millerstown.
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1916-06-22
PETERSON'S OINTMENT
BEST FOR ECZEMA
First Application stops Itching of
Eczema, Salt Rheum and Piles

Live and let live is my motto" SAYS
Peterson. druggists all over America
sell PETERSONS OINTMENT for 25
druggists, If anyone buys my ointment
for any of the diseases or ailments for
which recommend 1t and are not bene-
hted give them their money back
ters testifying to the mighty healing
power of Peterson's Ointment for old
anu running sores. eczema, salt rheum,
ulcers, sore nipples broken breast,
itching scalp and skin, blind, bleeding
John Scott, 2S3 Virginia St, Buffalo.
writes, "Peterson's Ointment Is simply
wonderful. 1t cured me of eczema and
also piles, and did it so quickly that
was astonished. Advertisement,
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1916-06-22
ESTATE
NEW HOTEL ON
DOEHNE PLOT
Five-Story Structure of Brick,
Stone, Concrete and
Steel

DZew hotel for Harrisburg is de-
scribed in the Philadelphia Public
Ledger this morning. n7st+s- 49,
The proposed building is to be built
by Charles E. and George L. Doehne,
and will occupy the big tract at
Fourth and Chestnut streets, now
owned by the Declines.
1t is to be thoroughly modern hos
telry, five stories high with basement,
of brick, stone, concrete and steel,
with a frontage on Chestnut street of
107 feet and on Fourth street of SO
feet
Among the companies estimating on
the contract are the Roydhouse-A -Arey
Company and James II. Wells, of
Philadelphia. The bids will be opened
July 10. C, Harry Kain is the archi-
tect
To Build -Four Homes. - At least
four homes will be built on the site of
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1916-06-22

the old Harrisburg Country Club, re-
Gently sold to Dr. Charles S. Rebuck,
412 North Third street These homes
VIII be built by DIR. Rebuck, William
NJ. Hargest, deputy attorney general;
DR.. Harvey F. Smith, 139 State street,
and DR.. David S. Funk, 800 North Sec
ond street
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1916-06-22
Republican Candidate
Is Back in New York

New York, June %. - Charles E..
Hughes arrived here early to-day from
Providence, r. l., where he attended
the commencement of Brown. Univer-
sity. He went to hotel. Mr.. Hughes
had only one engagement which was
to meet Franklin Murphy, formerly
governor of New Jersey, tomorrow
night
Mr.. Hughes will remain here until
Saturday when he will go to his sum-
mer home at Bridgehampton, l.. I.