The Washington herald., 1916-12-02
Listening
BY JOHN ID. BARRY.

Ihe otner oay i met q very inter-
esting group of people. They all had
things to say that were worth listen
ing to. But there was one among the
group. who, had never cultivated the
art OF listening. The consequence was
that he kept interrupting the con-
versation. Soon he had captured the
conversation. During the rest of the
, evening he maintained his control. He
forced us to discuss the things that
he was interested in without reference
to whether we were interested or
were not interested. He laid down the
law. As he went on he grew more
and more authoritative.
Then l saw that. bad listener as he
was, he had developed to q high de-
gree the art of listening to himself.
There was a man I used to know
who had made an elaborate study OF
the character of Hamlet. His interest
In Hamlet grew to be a passion. He
| talked Hamlet in season and out of
! season. Wherever he went he would
somehow manage to introduce the
subject of Hamlet. and all other sub
jects would be relegated to the back
ground. People used to dread meet
ing him. and at his approach they
would shy out of the way
The real trouble with that man was
hibited his power OF listening to any
one but himself. His capacity for
listening had became weefully spe-
cialized. as is the case with so many
of US.
We ought to cultivate the habit of
listening. 1t should be zealously
taught in our schools. 1t is not mere
ly a courteous and wholesome habit
in itself, developing consideration for
nj &c lob hlxr
Good listeners are nearly always
well educated. 1t makes no difference
whether they have or have not gone
to the schools and colleges. Out of
the air they are continually gathering
knowledge.
Bad listeners get very little out of
the air. Nearly everything they get
comes out of themselves. out Of their
very limited and biased consciousness.
A popular writer says that he is
| constantly receiving suggestions from
| listening. To him the words that with
most of US have SO little value may.
almost literally. be gold. He is con-
stantly on the alert. Often l have
seen him surreptitiously draw out a
note book and jot down something
/ that has just been said, something g
that he can either quote or develop. or
something that starts a train of
|
or a plot for a story or a novel
People sometimes complain and say
that he isn't nearly as interesting as
he ought to be.
The truth is that he seldom stops
working.
/ He says that life seems to him like
gold mine.
| Here, perhaps. is the only reproach
/ that can be made to good listeners.
] o
adventures in conversation admired
and celebrated by H. c. Wells.
! Moreover. they seldom advance any
daring and stimulating views. In this
way they suffer a penalty for their
conversation. When they do speak.
however, they are likely to have
something to say that is worth hear
ing. What they lack through their
indifference to the spirit of conversa-
esta ablishing about them of ease. quiet,
poise. which contribute to the gen.
eral comfort and which in themselves
tend to encourage sane thinking.
/ have noticed that bad listeners
often live together. So 1 have been
led to wonder IL bad listening might
not be contagious
| Surely. the habit of bad listening
must be related to continual inter
!
sulting resentment.
| In my own acquaintance l know
several large families where bad
listening prevails. These families
carry on an almost constant internal
warfare.
On the other hand, good listeners
who live among bad listeners may be
seriously injured. know a very
quiet man, the husband of a talkative
wife and father OF five exceedingly
talkative daughters. who. as the years
advance. grows more and more silent
OF late his friends have become
concerned about his silence. They
fear that he is being driven in on
himself farther and farther. In this
tendency they recognize danger.
What that man needs is encourage
ment to give expression to his
thoughts He is abviously suffering
from too much repression.
Bad listeners through never repressing
themselves, tend to repress others. They
also tend to repress some of the best
thinking in the world For the best think
ing in the world as rule, is lacking in
pugnacious qualities. 1t doesn't demand
assertion. 1t bides its time.
| The bad listeners are consequently
hinderers of progress. For this reason, If
| for no other reason, we ought to resolve
to think each day about listening and to
make a point of doing a little listening
ourselves.
After all. it is the art OF the actor in
another expression. The point really isn't
that We should try to listen. We should
simply try to be right-minded.
! II we are right-minded we shall do
plenty of listening. For right-minded-
ness will enable us to give as much con-
| consideration to others as We give to