davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Brattleboro daily reformer. (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1913-1955, 1916-06-12
A Holstein Tribute.
Rutland News.)

Inasmuch as the national head
quarters of the Holstcin-E'riesian
association are in Vermont and in
asmuch as this is the leading breed
of cattle in this great dairy state the
following tribute to the Holstein-
Friesian paid by the New York Sun
will be particularly appreciated by
thousands of Nermonters:
While the elephant and moose had
their day at Chicago, the Holstein COW
had hers at Detroit. The Hon. ID. D.
Ait1en of Flint, Mich, president of
the Holstein-Friesian Association of
America, spoke for the 100000 mem
bers of that useful bovine breed that
browse in American pastures.
"God made the cattle, and man
has made them better. A prize COW OF
not so many years ago would gradt
low TODAY Type once established, is
preserved by constant care, tests OF
conformity to standards of productiv
ness, size, and hardness. Fine Cattle
are fit creatures, successful passers o.
examinations more severe and search
| ing than those the colleges or ever
/ the recruiting sergeants apply to can
/ didates for their Endorsement as sehol
ars or soldiers.
A mature COW to be champion
must produce more than forty fou1
pounds of butter in seven days, NOR
than | 1000 pounds in a year. For
| two-year- the requirements are 8
and 1000 pounds. A New York COW
Ormsby Jane segis Aggie, gave 35.5
pounds Of bufterfat IN one week q
/ 1915. hut Minnesotan, Duchess Sky
| lark 0rnlsby, made the record for I'll
The Brattleboro daily reformer. (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1913-1955, 1916-06-12
Newfane,s Monument Pamphlet.
fMiaalehury Register.

A pamphlet has been published con.
tanning the proceedings at the dcflica-
ton III the Soldiers monument ut
Newfane On Memorial day. The prip-
cinal address was delivered BY Judge
Frank ii. Fish OF Vergennes. It Is d
model of what such Al address should
be. The contrast between the presnt
The Brattleboro daily reformer. (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1913-1955, 1916-06-12

ADVERTISE IN THE REFoRMER
The Brookings register. [volume] (Brookings, Brookings County, S.D.) 1903-1971, 1916-11-02
BEES STRUGGLE AT BIRTH
New Additions to Hive Have Trouble
Forcing Their Way into This
World of Labor.

1t is interesting to watch young
bees in the act Of Matching out from
the cells Of the hive. The wax cap
ping which confines them is thin,
but 1t is quite strong enough to give
the tender young bee a good deal of
trouble in nibbling it through. At
first II car only see a part Of the
Esect's head through a small hole it
has made. 1t gradually nibbles away
the wax till the hole is big enough
for the entire head to get through,
but ere this stage is reached the
young bee has been assisted in its eff
forts by several of the older bees
who, though no doubt engaged in
some other work, pause on their way
and very considerably nibble away
a little of the Gaping with their
strong jaws. Once the head of the
young bee is out of the cell, it has
much more power, and after pulling
and twisting perseveringly the
thorax is gradually worked free Of
its prison. Then the abdomen slips
easily after it, and the birth Of the
bee is accomplished. When they are
free of the cells, the young bees
stand for some time palpitating, and
apparently getting their breath again
after their efforts, while some of the
nurse-bees gently stroke them and
give them food.
The Brookings register. [volume] (Brookings, Brookings County, S.D.) 1903-1971, 1916-11-02
HOLLAND SHORT or TIMBER.

Holland is suffering from a seri-
ous shortage of timber for building
purposes, and the existing supply
will be exhausted within a few
months unless relief measures are
taken, according to the report of an
association of employers and work.
men in the building industry, which
recently met in Amsterdam. The
only hope, according to the associa-
ton, is to secure large quantities Of
timber owned by Dutchmen which
T now tied up in the harbor o.
Archangel, Russia. This can be
done, it is pointed out, only by as
surfing the Russian government that
the timber will not be sent out Of
Holland for use in the countries now
at war with Russia. 1t was resolved
to urge the Dutch ministry of com.
merce and industry to take the nee
essary steps for releasing the cargoes
detained at Archangel. Other car
goes consigned to Holland are tied
up in the Russian port Of Riga, but
under existing conditions there
seems to be no hope of their being
released.
The Brookings register. [volume] (Brookings, Brookings County, S.D.) 1903-1971, 1916-11-02
INDIANS HOLDING THEIR OWN
In Many Ways Are Showing Capacity
for Taking Their Place in Citi-
zenship of the Country.

In spite of the mistakes which
mark the history Of the relations of
the white man with the Indian, the
remnants Of the original American
stock are proving themselves capable
Of taking an honored place as citi-
zcns Of the nation which has sue
ceedcd to their birthright. In Okla
homa the Indian is now a citizen,
and there is no activity in which
white men excel that is not marked
by a comparable success on the part
Of the Indian. 1t is now proposed
ultimately to give all the Indians in
the United States full American citi-
zenship, and as the first remedial
step to place the administration Of
Indian affairs beyond the control Of
politics by establishing a federal
nonpartisan commission. In okla
homa, thousands Of full-blooded
Cherokees, Chickasaws, Choctaws,
Greeks and Seminoles are operating
well-kept farms and supporting ude-
quate and well-equipped schools. The
Navajo Indian blanket industry last
year reached a total of threc-quar-
tiers Of a million dollars, and 10000
Indian boys and girls were last year
being educated in special schools
conducted like our public schools.
There are now 100000 Indians in
the United States and $4,000 in
Alaska.-Christian Herald.
The Brookings register. [volume] (Brookings, Brookings County, S.D.) 1903-1971, 1916-11-02
ALL THE WORLDS A MARKET
Vast Extent Of Uncle Sans Buying
and Selling Is a Truly Aston
ishing Thing.

Change Shakespeare a little and
say all thc worlds = market and tbe
nations are only storckcencrs.
Looked at that way. Uncle Sam
is the earth's merchant king. the
PHILADELPHIA Public Ledger saws.
His buying and selling With outside
peoples in the last fiscal year
amounted to more than Sc. DOC ,O0O.-
600 $50 for every inhabitant in our
republic.
Uncle Sam sold so worth of stuff
for every ST he purchased. a new rec
ord in worldwide merchandising.
Which happy fact means that we cor
rallied during the last twelve months
considerably more than s.. ,OOO,-
coo Of foreign cash.
The Brookings register. [volume] (Brookings, Brookings County, S.D.) 1903-1971, 1916-11-02
NEW" MUSIC IS CRITICIZED
What Is Known as "Faturistr De.
elared to Be Merely a ConsIom-
Grafton of Discords.

We must always have something
Now, and so we must have new mu-
sic, and the chief distinction of it
is, it wholly discredits all that has
been thought good in the music of
ether days. 1t is merely a conglom-
Grafton Of discords, and commends
itself to art noodles for its utter nov
city. 1t sounded, says a critic, "as
if wrong notes were being played
most of the time" The Cinnamon
were futurists who applauded when
the orchestra were tuning up their
fddles and toothorns. The Spring
field Republican says, "The present.
day futurists lay particular stress on
the ingenious ugliness of the music"
In fact, the new music makes of ug-
illness its highest merit.
it is really the jumping-off place
of art. The age Of taste, of har-
mony, of beauty has passed, and in
its place we have discord and confu-
sion. Says a critic: "The ears we
have trained in so many of the old
concert halls at such a cost of dol
lars are useless for the new" We
will have to have new ears, perhaps
larger ones, to enjoy futurist music.
Possibly. to some of us unfortunate
ones we will not know it when it
comes. But there viii be no danger.
Futurist music will not get out Of
New York, where there are all kinds
Of people.-Ohio State Journal.
The Brookings register. [volume] (Brookings, Brookings County, S.D.) 1903-1971, 1916-11-02
HAS CAUSE TO BE PEEVEn
Square Deal in Matters Con-
corning the Dog.

Shorty : sore. He is SORE at his
dog. The dog originally was worth
80 cents, and cost $40 because Mrs.
Shorty made such a fuss over him
in the presence of the kennel keeper.
The first week Shorty owned him he
ran away. Shorty bought Sc worth
of want ads. Seven weeks after the
last want al appeared a boy brought
the dog home, claiming the S. re-
ward and putting in a bill for 81
for tie dogs keep for eleven weeks.
Shortl paid and bought a collar and
chain for 1925.
The dog lay passive on the back
porch Saturday night and Sunday
night But Monday night Mrs.
Shorty left the washing out on the
line. Some time in the night the
dog chewcd the chain in two and
then went out and tore all the clothes
from the line, ripping to pieces what
he didn't eat. That morning, before
Shorty was up, the dog-tax collector
came and collected from Mrs. Shorty.
Then Shorty got up and went into
the back yard and found the clothes
torn to pieces. The dog had run
away, presumably back to the home
of the boy who kept him before for
seven weeks. Shorty doesn't know
where the boy lives, but Mrs. Shorty
says he can find out with a want al.
Shorty knew that, but didn't want
to suggest it. SO he'll be down in
the morning with another want ad.
But he's sore.-Kansas City Star
The Brookings register. [volume] (Brookings, Brookings County, S.D.) 1903-1971, 1916-11-02
U. S. GRANT AND MARK TWAIN
How Americas Greatest Humorist
Welcomed the General to Hartford
During Presidential Campaign.

eighteen hundred and eighty
was a presidential year. Mark Twain
was for General Garfield, and made
a number of remarkable speeches in
his favor" writes 4. B. Paine in St.
Nicholas. General Grant came to
Hartford during the campaign, and
Mark Twain was chosen to make the
address of welcome. Perhaps no such
address of welcome was ever made
before. He began:
81 am among those deputed to
welcome you to the sincere and cor
dial Inequalities of Hartford, the
city of the historic and rcyered char
ter oak, of which most Of the town
is built
ole seemed at a loss what to say
next, and, leaning over, pretended to
whisper to Grant. Then, as if he
had been prompted by the great SOL
der, he Strengthened up and poured
out a fervent eulogy Of Grants vic
tories, adding in an aside as he fin
ished: 4 nearly forgot that part of
my Speech to the roaring delight of
his hearers, while Grant himself
grimly smiled.
Gle then spoke of the general be-
ing now out of public employment, of
how grateful to him his country was
and how it stood ready to reward
him 'in every concciyable-inexpen-
sive way
Grant had smiled more than once
during the speech, and when this
sentence came out at the end his
composurc broke up altogether, while
the throng shouted approval"
The Brookings register. [volume] (Brookings, Brookings County, S.D.) 1903-1971, 1916-11-02
MADE HIT WITH KITCHENER
Philadelphia Veteran Told Great Brit
ish Soldier a Story He Never
Had Heard Before.

When | called the attention Of
General Huidekoper to the fortune
of $S50,000 which Earl Kitchener
left, he remarked:
eyes, had We adopted the English
system in the United States, Grant
would have been a millionaire and
Sherman, Sheridan and Meade very
rich mem"
Washington would have become
the duke of Yorktown and given an
estate many times the size of Mount
Vernon.
General Huidekoper told me that
when III Cairo a few years ago,
Kitchener entertained him at lunch
con, "Girard' writes in the Phila-
delphia Ledger. 81 was impressed
by his cordial manner-indeed, ev-
crything about him was impressive
except his eyes"
The Philadelphia veteran told X.
of X. that Americans had two sto-
ries which they always told about
him. "I'd like to hear Them said
the hero Of khartum.
"One was about an eyeglass-"
ooh, yes broke in Kitchener, "I've
heard that one often. What's the
other?'
"While you were in India" said
the man who left an arm at Gettys-
burg, "you overheard the members
Of your staff highly commenting an
officer who had just gone out from
England to join you. They declared
that he was a blooming fine fellow,
w%rereupon You remarked:
"'I'ye always observed that the
men who are blooming fine fellows
are blooming poor officers"
Kitchener had never heard that
story Of himself, but he was enor-
mousIy pleased with the sentiment
it expressed.
The Brookings register. [volume] (Brookings, Brookings County, S.D.) 1903-1971, 1916-11-02
WARS EFFECT ON WILD LIFE
Many Fled Before the Sound Of the
Guns, While Others Were Appar.
emily Undisturbed.

Some curiou9 sad interesting OBJ
servations upon the psychological eff
feet produced or animals by the de-
donations of big guns have been re-
Gently made. The animals consid-
cred are the horses and dogs used
for military purposes, and the game
in the area of warfare. 1t was no.
ticed soon after the beginning of the
war that the latter began to migrate
into Luxembourg, Switzerland, and
the portions of France and Belgium
not the seat of hostilities.
The first to flee was the "black
game" "a term which includes the
wild boar, the badger and the bear),
whose senses are specially acute.
Then the roebuck and the red deer
followed; but, strange to say, the
hare, whose timidity is proverbial,
continued to occupy its usual terri
tory. The larger birds likewise, such
as the grouse, the pheasant, the sea-
eagle and the wild duck were driven
away by the heavy firing.
Strange to say, the wolf, which
was expected to regain lost ground
In the present war, has shown itself
very gun-shy. Another curious fact
is that the songbirds, such as the
lark, the thrush and the finch, have
not been driven away by the thunder
OF the cannon, and continue to hold
their nests and sing their songs in
their accustomed haunts. Other
birds which remain unfrightened are
various kinds Of owls, falcons, SPAR
row-hawks, crows, etc.
The Brookings register. [volume] (Brookings, Brookings County, S.D.) 1903-1971, 1916-11-02
HOW He WROTE "AMERICA"
Doctor Smith indited 1t on the Spur of
the Moment-Not Intended
for National Hymn.

In connection with the recent
presentation of the original manu-
script of "America" to the Harvard
college library by the surviving chill
dren Of Rev. DR.. Samuel Francis
Smith, author Of the hymn, the fol-
lowing account by Doctor Smith of
how be came to write it is revived:
The hymn America was the
fruit of examining a number of mu-
sic books and songs for German pub
lie schools, placed in my hands by
Lowell Mason, Esq. Falling in with
the tune in one of them, now called
America and being pleased with its
simple and easy movement, glanced
at the German words, and, seeing
that they were patriotic, instantly
felt the impulse to write a patriotic
hymn of my own to the same tune.
Selling a scrap of waste paper, | put
upon 1t, within half an hour, the
verses substantially as they stand to-
day. l did not propose to write a
national hymn. / did not know that
l had done so. The whole matter
passed out of my mind.
GA few weeks afterward I sent to
Mr.. Mason some TRANSACTIONS and
other poems; this must have CHANGED
to be among them. This occurred in
February, 1882. To my surprise, |
found later that he had incorporated
it into a program for the celebration
of July 4, 1882, in Park street
church, Boston,"
The Brookings register. [volume] (Brookings, Brookings County, S.D.) 1903-1971, 1916-11-02
ANOTHER BREAKDOWN.

1t seemed an age that the poor
man was on the fiat Of his back.
His friends stood about him with
long faces, hea"ing sigh after sigh.
1t was truly a serious case.
But suddenly there came a shout
of triumph from the PROSTATE form.
"Eureka" he shouted, trium-
phantly. cat last | have that pesky
carburetor fixed"
With a wild wheop his friends
drew him from under the car,
brushed the dust from his back,
climbed into the big red machine
and sped down the pike.
The Brookings register. [volume] (Brookings, Brookings County, S.D.) 1903-1971, 1916-11-02
WHAT CLARE WAS.

Two young naval officers were
heard discussing their respective
dearests and bests-for the time be-
ing.
81 think Glare is a dear little
craft" said one.
"'Dear and little did you say?"
snorted the other. "She's dear all
right, but / don't know SO much
about the little She's the biggest
revenue cutter I've ever seen."--Tit-
Bits.
The Brookings register. [volume] (Brookings, Brookings County, S.D.) 1903-1971, 1916-11-02
JACKS JILLS.

The train was rushing over the
prairies of western Kansas.
els that another jack rabbit,
uncle?" asked the fair passenger,
who was looking out through the car
window.
eyes," replied the elderly mar at
her side.
Chats what you have said about
all of them we have seen. Are there
no-ah-Jill rabbits, uncle"
The Brookings register. [volume] (Brookings, Brookings County, S.D.) 1903-1971, 1916-11-02
so THE CALF KEPT ON.

AS a train stopped at a little Ohio
station the passengers heard the
plaintive bawling Of a calf, which
was being wheeled along the plat
form in a crate.
"There's someone complaining,
conductor" said a traveller, looking
for a bit of fun.
"Not to me-" answered the mild
old ticket taker. "Never heard a
passengers complaint with that
much sense."-Judge.
The Brookings register. [volume] (Brookings, Brookings County, S.D.) 1903-1971, 1916-11-02
CAN'T KEEP e

"There's no pleasure in driving a
motor car any more"
"No?"
"No. 1t doesn't make any differ
ence how fast you drive, there's al
ways someone with a faster car COM
ing along to give you the horn and
make you get over to let him go by"
Free Press.
The Brookings register. [volume] (Brookings, Brookings County, S.D.) 1903-1971, 1916-11-02
lDEAIIZATlON.

"Do you mean to tell me you never
went to a circus in your lifeS"
"Neyer."
"But your business is designing
the pictures they put on billboards."
CHATS why | never 60 to a show.
1t might hamper my imagination"
The Brookings register. [volume] (Brookings, Brookings County, S.D.) 1903-1971, 1916-11-02
HERO, MAYB e.

Tommy-Pa, what's a biped?
Father-An animal with two legs.
For instance, a man is a biped.
Tommy - Well, what's Uncle
james? He's only got one leg
Boston Evening Transcript.
The Brookings register. [volume] (Brookings, Brookings County, S.D.) 1903-1971, 1916-11-02
MARTYRDOM.

"Mrs. FluIfer says her social du-
ties leave her scarcely any time for
rest"
"Yes," replied Miss Cayenne.
"She is one of the unfortunate
people who regard being frivolous as
one of the most serious things of
life"
The Brookings register. [volume] (Brookings, Brookings County, S.D.) 1903-1971, 1916-11-02
WELCOME SIGHT.

EDO you think it lucky to see the
new moon over your right Shout
der?" inquired the superstitious cit
izen.
eyes," replied Farmer Corntossel.
"The kind of weather we've been
havin', you're lucky to see the moon
any old way"
The Brookings register. [volume] (Brookings, Brookings County, S.D.) 1903-1971, 1916-11-02
SHE COULD TALK.

Mr.. Yeast-How would you like
to try one of those diving suits, dear?
Mrs. Yeast-Oh, l couldn't live
in one Of those.
ooh, yes you could. They have
speaking tubes, you know"
The Brookings register. [volume] (Brookings, Brookings County, S.D.) 1903-1971, 1916-11-02
THING OF

Opinions differ" remarked the
museum guide, "as to what period
this extinct animal belongs TO-"
"That animal doesn't belong to
any period" exclaimed the gramma-
rian. at belongs to an exclama-
ton ~point."
The Brookings register. [volume] (Brookings, Brookings County, S.D.) 1903-1971, 1916-11-02
THE WRONG LOCALITY

"Let us flavor our dinner with a
little Attic salt"
"Attic salt? Why, We always keep
ours in the Kitchen"
The Brookings register. [volume] (Brookings, Brookings County, S.D.) 1903-1971, 1916-11-02
MERE PRETExT.

"Biggins can't argue without los
ing his temper"
II don't blame the argument. He
feels like losing bis temper anyhow,
and makes the argument an excuse"
The Brookings register. [volume] (Brookings, Brookings County, S.D.) 1903-1971, 1916-11-02
THE ADMIRED QUADRUPED.

"That figure you refer to as a cat
looks more like a pig"
"Let it go at that" replied the
amateur painter. "a pig is much
more valuable than a cat"
The Brookings register. [volume] (Brookings, Brookings County, S.D.) 1903-1971, 1916-11-02
RARE DISCRIMINATION.

"Has your daughter a discriminate
ing taste in music?"
"Undoubtedly. She'd rather turn
on the photograph than try to sing
and play herself"
The Brookings register. [volume] (Brookings, Brookings County, S.D.) 1903-1971, 1916-11-02
GOT Fem BLUFFED.

"Your boy seems to have all the
other boys skeered of him. Must be
a good fighter"
81 can't say about that. But |
do know this-he's an awful good
claimer."-Louisville Courier-Jour-
nal
The Brookings register. [volume] (Brookings, Brookings County, S.D.) 1903-1971, 1916-11-02
TWINS.

Crusty-I hear you have an addi-
ton to your family.
Pater-Ycs-put down one and
carry two.-Judge.
The Brookings register. [volume] (Brookings, Brookings County, S.D.) 1903-1971, 1916-11-02
MAY COME TO THIS.

"Is this a ten-cent store Z"
at is, madam"
81 heard you have wonderful bar
gains. Where is your automobile
department." - Louisville Courier
Journal.
The Brookings register. [volume] (Brookings, Brookings County, S.D.) 1903-1971, 1916-11-02
ANIMAL FOOD.

"Thc man who gave hal order
must be straight from some 700"
"What was his order?"
ga pony of brandy, a pousse-cafe
and a hot dog"
The Brookings register. [volume] (Brookings, Brookings County, S.D.) 1903-1971, 1916-11-02
TIME TO MOVE AWAY.

give years ago land out our way
vas being sold at four dollars an
acre."
"What's it being sold for now?"
"TaXes."
The Brookings register. [volume] (Brookings, Brookings County, S.D.) 1903-1971, 1916-11-02
HIS WEAKNESS.

81 married Jack to reform him"
"Of WHAT"
"Of telling ether girls that he
loved them."-Boston Evening Tran
script.
The Brookings register. [volume] (Brookings, Brookings County, S.D.) 1903-1971, 1916-11-02
GENEROUS.

Gin our religion w never W u
neighbor a grudge."
"Oh-you pay up immediately
Michigan Gargoyle.
The Brookings register. [volume] (Brookings, Brookings County, S.D.) 1903-1971, 1916-11-02
THE NEW HAT.

Mrs. de Style-Women nrc an ex-
pensive blessing.
Mr.. de Style-They are expensive.
Judge.
The Brookings register. [volume] (Brookings, Brookings County, S.D.) 1903-1971, 1916-11-02
NOT SPECIFIED.

"You told that sallow-faced girl
her skin was like peaches"
"Pesfectly true. | meant yellow
peaches"
The Brookings register. [volume] (Brookings, Brookings County, S.D.) 1903-1971, 1916-11-02
OLD-FASHIONEO D.

"She's an old-fashioned girl, isn't
she?"
"Dear me, yes! She had on a
frock at least six months DID,
Life.
The Brookings register. [volume] (Brookings, Brookings County, S.D.) 1903-1971, 1916-11-02
NO DISTINCTION.

She-There goes Jones. : near
he married a very superior n
"Any would be superior 10
Ioacs."-Lifc.
The Brookings register. [volume] (Brookings, Brookings County, S.D.) 1903-1971, 1916-11-02
FLOWERS OF THE FIRESiDE.

Wife--The policeman called on the
cook last night.
Husband-Ah a conference of the
powers.
The Brookings register. [volume] (Brookings, Brookings County, S.D.) 1903-1971, 1916-11-02
HER STATUS.

"What a funny-looking girl"
eyes; she was the missing link in
the Vassar daisy chain. Yale Rec
ord.
The Brookings register. [volume] (Brookings, Brookings County, S.D.) 1903-1971, 1916-11-02
OUR LANGUAGE.

New Directsr-What did you say
sinking fund was for?
Treasurer-To meet the floating
debt.
The Brookings register. [volume] (Brookings, Brookings County, S.D.) 1903-1971, 1916-11-02
IN THE QUlcK-LUNcH ROOM,

"Give me a light lunch instantly"
"All right, sir. jim, turn on The
electric currents"
The Brookings register. [volume] (Brookings, Brookings County, S.D.) 1903-1971, 1916-11-02
ITS PLACE.

'Where shall | send this nature
story?"
"Why not to a corn magazine?"
The Brookings register. [volume] (Brookings, Brookings County, S.D.) 1903-1971, 1916-11-02

Charlie-I get engaged to a differ
cnt girl every year | come up here.
Frank-Lucky dog. | got mar
ried to the first one | became en-
gagged to.