The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1916-10-16
ON SPUR OF
THE MOMENT

~ ROY X. MoULToN.

The New Stuff.
1 listen to a nifty vood-ville team.
As they let off their ragged rag ilhe steam
l listen as they wildly syncopate;
The audience applauds and calls it great
ao not bad e music in the
They Shout, they yell, they wildly paw the
Until think it is some weird nightmare.
They do not really sing, the only talk
They initiate the negro with a slang,
The like of which no negro ever sang
They twist, they turn, they. dance upon
They mark time by the trombone's blatant
1t would indeed be quite a novelty
To cut the fool stuff temporarily.
I'd like to hear, just once, 1 would, by
A song or two our grandmas used to sing
Why Buy One.
Il started out to buy a car this
spring" said the tall men at the end
of the bar.
Yes" said the short man with the
fuzzy fedora. why not? You can
afford it all right
II can afford to buy one all right"
said the tall man, but don't have
to. My wife and 1 can get all the
riding and more than we want with
out putting up the $500. 1 have
discovered a scheme whereby 1 can
enjoy all of the Benefits while the
other fellow Pays all the expenses.
When L let it be noised around that
1 might buy a car there were up
wards of thirty automobile agents at
my office in less than no time and
each one wanted to take my wife and
myself out riding. 1 picked out one
and he chased us around every day
for two weeks. Then l let another
one have his turn, then another, then
another. We are riding all the time
two weeks. 1 have got it figured out
that there are enough agents in this
town to last us until late this month,
and then the riding season will be
over and I won't really have to buy
a car until next year and even then
perhaps there will be a new crop of
agents in our midst. Why buy a
carr"
why, indeed?" repeated the short
man. Tomorrow morning. bright
and early. I shall announce that I am
about to buy a car. Thanks, old
man."
Marie-No, we don't know of any
eligible bachelor who wants to get
married. They may have to, some
time, to stay out of the poorhouse, but
We don't know of one who really
wants to.
W. Fine only way you can win
any money from a woman playing
cards is by keeping cold hand up
the left sleeve and by dealing off the
bottom.
Daisy-We don't know whether
blondes or brunettes are the more
temperatmental Ask some man whose
wife has been both.
Solid Ivory-Give her a good let
ting alone for about six weeks and
she will come and eat out of your
hand.
Girls.
They're getting into politics and glory in
the strife. ~
They're cutting quite figure in the realms
of business life. -
Now this may be the stylish thing but it
must be confessed
That after all is said and done we like
the home girl best
Her biscuits may not be the best e'er made
Her pie crusts may together stick and may
refuse to part.
Her corned beef hash may taste Just like
fluff rug in distress.
Her soup may be enough to make a Grim
inal confess.
But still it makes n Teller glad, wherever
he may roam,
To think that this old-fa shioned girl waits
his arrival home.
OF course, you know, there's not a doubt
that we like all the rest,
But getting squarely down to facts, we like
the home girl hest