The Washington herald., 1916-10-12
Seen and Heard by George Miner.

New York, Oct. II.-"Mike' Goldsmith-as he
is called by his friends though the juxtaposition
of is incongruous-was waiting on the
Stamford station for his car to take him out to
his country place. A stranger who had come up
with him from New York was also waiting for
something Mike" was smoking cigarette. The
stranger approached and said:
Pardon me- but can you let me have cigar
ette? l am all out and there are tobacco
stores around here"
why, no." said Mike. 81 roll my I can
give you the makings for one" And he pulled
out his tobacco pouch and package of paper.
That's very kind of you, but l can't roll it.
Would you mind rolling for me?"
Certainly replied Mike" and proceeded to
do so.
coffin tack and said:
Now. you oblige me with a match?"
Certainly" replied Mike" and handed over
his match box.
The stranger struck match after match and
unable to get to stay in flame long
enough to accomplish the desired purpose.
81 am very sorry" said he, "but I to
be unable to light it. Do you think you would
have any better luck?"
Look here, mister" said Mike" about all
you seem to have is habit"
Mike" by the way, is the star comedian of
the Yale Club and every night that he dimes
there there is a circle of admiring listeners
round his table It was he who originated the
joke which Reynolds the rope thrower uses with
such good effect in Flo Ziegfeld's Midnight Fol-
lies. 1t happened in this wise:
Mike" was discussing chorus girls more
or less favorte topic with him, and in celebrating
on the hardships they had to endure he said:
NV, ryr1 L0O frOr
day to day where their next limousine is coming
from"
The strenuous efforts of big metropolitan
newspapers to increase their circulation has caused
at least one lady in New York to swear off on
the newspaper reading habit entirely This is her
tale of woe:
"The telephone rang in my house day"
said she, "and the maid said was wanted l
went to the phone and a feminine voice pleas
antIy asked me if I read the New York Tribune.
I told her I didn't think I did. There were one
or two papers that came to the house but didn't
think the Tribune was Of them. She wanted
to know if she might not have the pleasure Of
sending it to for a couple of weeks. l told
her of course she could if she wanted to but I
only glanced at newspapers anyway and hardly
knew one from another.
Sure enough, the next day found Tribune
afternoon l was called to the telephone again.
The pleasant feminine voice wanted to know if l
had received the paper and how l liked it. l
told her l thought liked it very we'll 1t seemed
to be a good looking paper, but as it hadn't been
unfolded I couldn't tell much about its literary
contents.
Day after day, the paper kept coming. Day
after day. l was called up on the phone, inter
rupted in the most inconvenent times, as the
maid always said it was a personal call for ME
only Once I even had to get out of the bathtub
to answer it; another time I was interrupted at
lunch another time l was leaving the house and
was called back-always to find the same pleasant
voice asking ME if had received the Tribune and
if I had read some certain article in it, This
kept up for ten days until I absolutely lost my
temper and l scoded that pleasant voice as hard
as I knew how
"Now please tell what right has a news
paper or newspaper employe to become such a
nuisance2 l don't how they can afford it for
one thing. Newspapers only cost cent and are
within the reach of everybody. 1t seems to me
like an unnecessary struggle to get readers to
hire a pleasant-voiced young woman to call up
On the telephone every day until you fairly hate
her and her pleasant voice. Won't you please
put this in the paper and ask them to stop it."