davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Norwich bulletin., 1916-04-15
9oT REApY FoR INDEPENDENCE

GOT READY FOX INDEPENDENCE
@When the minority members of the
1ouse committee on insular affairs set
'orth in their report on the Clarke
amendment, which provides for the
Independence of the Philippines in
rom two to four years, that the is
ands are not ready for self govern
nent and that any such effort as is
icing made to unjustly hasten the
ley is american, it cannot help
icing realized that they are safe
Harding the interests of both this
ountry and the islands. The good
fork which has been done there
night not to be allowed to come to
a. end,
Not only has this country, in rec
gnition of the trust imposed upon
when it took over the islands. made
Norwich bulletin., 1916-04-15

How watered stock originates is ex-
emplified nowadays when almost every
week appears a notice about this COM
pany and that company increasing its
capital stock. This is a favorable time
for water. In fact every time business
runs over the measure you will note
that every state is eager to grant
rights to every concern making appl-
cation. There is no more necessity
now for a half million dollar concern
increasing its capital to a million than
at the start. If the tax for watered
stock was collected at the source there
would be less capitalization, but that
seems to be an after-thought with the
average Observation-Disclosures Press.
preparedness as women see it. We
have read all about the self-defense
leagues, public drills, practice with
firearms and the other martial enthu-
siasms of women which are sweeping
across country. Then one day we
CHANGED on this description of a drill
officers uniform: She wore tight fit
ting knickerbockers, puttees, and a
skirt hat came to the knees and rip
pied with up-to-date fulness. She wore
a white silk shirt, a snug coat OF khaki
a campaign hat, big pearl earrings. and
boots with high French heels Shade
of Napoleoni Who will dare remind the
ladies' that IAN army is no stronger
than its feet?'-New Haven Times
Leader.
Norwich bulletin., 1916-04-15

We never think there is a country in
all the world that Will Carleton's
song "Over the Hills to the Poor
house" will not fit, but Sweden has an
abundance of hills but no poorhouses.
In the place of poorhouses Sweden
has a system-a system which keeps
its inhabitants independent and self
respecting. They do not have any
homes for the aged, but a system
which is sunshine to all in the de-
cline of life. They have an insurance
system Of one-payment which does
this work. When each child is born
the parents deposit with the old age
pension bureau the equivalent of So,
| SO or SIS, occasionally a larger or
| smaller sum. This one deposit is all
the parents or guardians make. The
| government tabulates the child and
! registers the amount and the wheels
| of compound interest begin to revolve
for term of fifty years. No member
| of the child's family is required to do
anything more. When the child has
! lived to be SO years old and his iden-
tity is established, the government be-
| gins to pay in monthly instruments of
| 800 and $3.50 to the two classes. The
| funds Of those who die before so years
of age go to the general fund. This is
a system a free government could
readily adopt.
Norwich bulletin., 1916-04-15

II may be we'll to call attention to
the fact that it no longer takes nine
tailors to make man., since
any tailor of today can make
half a man look like a fashion
plate, and a professional gentleman
look like a fool without Multiplying
We must all agree with the Rev. Mr..
Jasper that "de worl do move ="
There was a time when it was enough
to be clothed in translucent bright
ness, but in these days clothes nave
much to do with making the man, who
to measure up well among his fellows
must have his mind clothed, too! 1t
is difficult to discover why tailors
were ever held in such derision that it
Norwich bulletin., 1916-04-15
SEA TALES OF OLD NORWICH

son for OBTAINING them longer being
found, they were released and reach
ed home in July.
During 1903, the brig William lost
while in the West Indies, Capt. George
w. Palmer. master, samuel Hyers,
mate, and three seamen by tropical
sickness.
Norwich bulletin., 1916-04-15

In the old burying ground, Norwich,
Chelsea playground, as it was long
ago called, a monument bore the fol-
lowing inscription, a brief record of
the loss which the family of Capt
Billings sustained when the Fortune
was wrecked:
Norwich bulletin., 1916-04-15

aged 80 years,
and James F. Billings,
aged Is years,
and Benjamin Billings,
aged Is years.
Sons Of Capt Alpheus and Mrs. E1iz-
abeth Billings, and
also of Mr.. David Barber,
son-in-law, aged 90 years,
Who were lost at sea in September.
1904. in the Brig Fortune.
Honolulu star-bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1912-2010, 1916-11-18
~ SotIETY

and Miss Je@e: .dattis OF chicago
- Cert Elmer F. Rice has been as
signed To the md Infantry aud will
socn move down from Castner TO Fort
Shafter "a. 49,. ~. i. r..
The: Fort Shafter Sewing Club met
at thu home OF Mrs. Ralph c Holiday
on Wednesday. Those who sewed dur
ing the morning were Mrs Edward
Fuller Witsen. Mrs, Benjamin: F. Me
CleHan, Mrs. r. NJ. Lyon, Mrs. Charles
l.. Wyman. Mrs Gay G. Palmer. Mrs.
William r. Dash;elb. Madame Pearson
and Mrs. Holiday. ......=
Lieut., and Mrs. Halloran entertain,
cd informally on Thursday evening
fer Mrs Charles L. Wyman.
when Mrs. Robert r. Raymond en-
tertained at cards on Wednesday,
those invited from Fort Shafter were
Mrs Daniel Lane Howell, Mrs Guy G.
Palmer, Miss Campbell, Mrs. William
f.. Hunt, Mrs. Alden c. Knowles. Mrs.
Raymond A. Wheeler and Mrs. Will
am Reese Scott. ..-:.:. IL:
One of the most attractive dinners
of the week was that given by Lieut..
and Mrs. Frank A. Sloan Pink roses
made a charming centerpiece, while
candles shaded in pink added much to
the beauty Of the table. Dainty rose
cards marked the places for Com
mander and Mrs. Victor Houston, Mr..
and Mrs. Gustav Schaefer, Capt and
Mrs. Claire r. Bennett and the host
and hostess. Later Lieut. and Mrs.
Sloan and their guests adjourned to
the informal 2nd Infantry hop.
Capt and Mrs. Claire R. Bennett
had as their dinner guest on Thurs
day evening Mrs Charles l.. Wyman.
One of the largest and most delight
full affairs of the week was the supper
given before the End Infantry hop on
Friday evening by Capt and Mrs. Viii
liam E.. Hunt, when they entertained
for many of their friends in their quar-
tiers in the main garrison. The color
scheme for the evening was pink. The
decorations, which were most profuse
and effective. were sweet peas and
fern. These dainty flow
ers also marked the centers of the
small tables at which the guests were
seated Those enjoying Capt and
Mrs. Hunts hospitality were Col. and
Mrs Daniel Lane Howell, Lieut. Col
and Mrs. William r. Dashiell, Madame
Pearson, Maj. and Mrs. Guy G.. Palm
er, Miss Campbell, Capt and Mrs. AL
den c.. Knowles, Capt. and Mrs. Ed.
win Simpson Hartshorn, Maj. and Mrs
Ohio B. Rosenbaum, Col. and Mrs.
William p. Kendall, Capt. and Mrs.
Raymond A. Wheeler, Capt. Robert
NJ. Lyon, Mrs. Charles l. Wyman, Mrs.
Honolulu star-bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1912-2010, 1916-11-18

best ;%-ed lis quests to tire Opgrss
i iFcae. ~ilEge tcy greatly enjoyed
the II zlazz trlEl1s I.gaE il L.loa.
Maj William b.. Cochran 2a1 l9*
fantr11 has been scented lelve Ut al
sense far enc month. t5. t3Ee effect
ugcR his ARRIVAL in san Franc SEQ TIE
majUr VII leave or tie. trans port sail,
ing from fen sala about pereN Der
> and be aG ~ n II 3 nied Ell his
ie,igHey TO the nea II ,.lnl by his moth.
es. Maia1le G. chr6n: wiz nilt visit
her n. I:eut fab,J. II Cochran. q
4. CT 1t Cape ear, \. c.. ana nualer-
cas- ffiends IN ~ iE@ min Madame
Co1 En- VIII be greatly missed rot.
only in abe sec a life Of Fort Shattar
and Honolulu, where she rs grtatly
beloved by all but her absence falSa
Willie keeniy felt IN the church; and
Sunday school work Cf Fort Sh4rter,
where she has been in every way Of
the greatest assistance 10 the clap
lain, William Reese scott: She Twin
be missed as well. in the hilantlro ,c
work Of Fort Shafter and every! Ter
son iii the garrison not emily VII great
.ly. regret her departure, bat also, sin
cerely trllst that she. will shortly re-
turn. :te the post Tor q much IghGer
sta 81. =. ..@.. "
Honolulu star-bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1912-2010, 1916-11-18

Edward Fuller Wijs.Ti. Or and Mrs.
Bcrnhardt K. StImberE. Mrs. Thomas
!. Camp, Mrs. Lehman, !. lieut.. Eugene
Lehman, Miss jewel Maths. Lieut.
and Mrs. lockwood and Lieut.. and
mrs John s Sullivan. .:..=..=. -..s .
Mrs. Thomas j~=Camp has a.. lunch.
eon guests en- Thursday Mrs living,
81 N WatrCus and Mis- Clyde T. An. a.
nam OF ScHafield Barracks Il H..
Capt. and Mrs Lloyd r. FredendaEI
have taken the quarters recently CScu-
pied By Lieut.. Theodore Mart Il II tie
cantcnmcnt, ...." -. -. j.. ~.
Capt. and NJ 5, Charles l.. McKain
have moved into quarters No :, form
erly ccsu@ied by Gait James Z. Bell
Capt. and Mrs Loserh \ McAndycw
entertained informally at luncheon on
Friday for Capt. and Mrs. Llcyd r.
Fredendall. r. .=.- ~
The hop. ON Friday evening though
informal was most enjoyable one
Many Of the town people mCtOred cut
and the service as. usual was we'll rep-
resented. The guests were received
by Mai. and Mrs. Guy c. Palmer. Of
the Fort Shafter garrison =. =" :.." +.
The football game between the End
Infantry and PunahOu> which i was
played on Wednesday, the 18th. was
quite success despite the weather.
The 2nd Infantry team cheered on by
hundreds Of the End infantry and the
music Of that regiment, plunged
through mud and rafn-soaked sod to
victory to the score of II to q. while
tile honkinc of the horns OF the auto
mobiles parked on the Alexander
Heights added to the excitement OF a
splendidly contested game The cheer
ing of the Oahu College young men
and women was greatly enjoyed by the,
military enthusiasts S, and although the
rain kept many away yet those who
brayed the elements were well re-
paid. The hundred-dollar mark was
almost reached. The men of the gar
rison responded nobly to the call of
the promoter of the affair, Chaplain
William Reese Scott, for the great
cause of the Army Relief Society.
Among those noticed at the game were
Mr.. Ernest r. Chase, dean of Oahu
College: Mai and Mrs. Ohio b. ROsen-
baum, Maj. and Mrs. William b. Cocl-
ran, Capt. and Mrs. Robert NJ Lyon,
Miss Bonnie Scott, Miss Maths, DR..
Deiber, Capt. Joseph A.. McAndrew,
Lieut.. William H. Britton, Capt Edwin
S. Hartshorn, Chaplain William Reese
Scott, Capt Charles L. McKain, CAPT.
William E. Hunt, Capt. Raymond A.
Wheeler, Lieut-Col.. William Weigel,
Gen. Samuel |. Johnson. n. G. H.;
Lieut.. Chas B. Lyman and many
others. .~..- II - @... + Il.
Mrs. Fl. Taylor of New York enter
tanned at dinner en- Wednesday at the
Moana hotel in honorsuf his. daughter,
Miss Hazel Taylor. The table was
most attractive, having for its decora-
tons sweet peas and maidenfair fern
Mr. Taylor,s guests were Capt. and
Mrs. Alden c. Knowles, Mr. Walker of
New York and Miss Littell of Will
Delaware. After dinner the
Honolulu star-bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1912-2010, 1916-11-18

mingled with maidenhair fern TO form
a centerpiece for the daintily appoint.
ed table on which covers we're laid for
Capt and Mrs. William E HInt Dr.
and Mrs. Bernhaadt X. Stuiaberg. Mad
anne Pearson, Mrs Edward Fuller Wit
sell and the host and hostess. After
dinner Lieut-Col. and Mrs Dashiell
motored their guests to the reception
in honor of the natal day Of King
Kalakaua, that was given at the Ma
tional Guard Armory
Many Of the contingent OF Fort Shat
ter will hear with pleasure that CAPT.
and Mrs. Lloyd r. FredendaH viii re-
turn to the End Infantry. as Capt. FIRE.
dendall has just received orders as
signing him to that regiment.
Mrs. William II. Dashiell was the
hostess this week for the Tuesday
evening card club Those playing dur
ing the evening were Lieut.-Col and
Mrs William r. Dashiell, Madame
Pearson, Madame Cochran, Mrs. Will
liam b. Cochran, Capt and Mrs. Ray
mend A. Wheeler, Mrs Daniel Lane
Howell. Capt and Mrs. Claire R. Ben
nett, Mrs. William +. Hunt, Or. and
Mrs 9ernharit X Stumberg. Mrs.
Charles l.. Wyman, Lieut. and Mrs.
Ralph c: Holiday, Miss Elizabeth Ros-
enbaun, Mrs Edward Fuller Witsell
and Mrs. Alden c. Knowles. Lieut.
Holiday was the fortunate winner of
yeiy good LOOKING brass vase.
Mrs Arthur T. Dalton entertained
on Wednesday afternoon at bridge
for Mrs. Claire r. Bennett, Mrs.
Charles l.. Wyman and Mrs. Ralph C..
Holiday, The prize, which was an at
tractivc Japanese vase, was awarded
TO Mrs Bennett, who held the highest
honors
Saturday evening jolly party mo-
tored to Fort De Russy for a moon
light swim, After a refreshing dip,
a delicious supper was enjoyed The,
participants in this affair were Capt.
and Mrs. Raymond A. Wheeler, Lieut..
and Mrs. Ralph c. Holiday, Miss
Jewel Maths, Miss Elizabeth Rosen-
baum and DR.. Harry NJ. Deiber.
Another dinner that was given be-
fore the KalakaGa reception on Thurs
day evening was when Lient and Mrs.
Ralph c. Holiday entertained for
Mai. and Mrs. William B. Cochran and
Mrs. Hugh Harrison of Los Angeles.
Mai and Mrs. Ohio B. Rosenbaum
entertained informally at dinner on
in their home in the main
garrison, for Mrs. Thomas j. Camp
Honolulu star-bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1912-2010, 1916-11-18
Fl. SKATER SOCIETY

Especial Star Bulletin CorrespondenceJ
FORT. SKATER, Nov. Isl Lieut.
Col. and Mrs. William r. Dashiel en-
tertained at cards on Saturday even
Ing complimenting Madame lockwood
who has been the house-guest of her
son and daughter-in-iaw, lieut. and
Mrs. lockwood, for the past month
There were three tables of bridge AMI
one table OF 500. Those playing were
Mai. and Mrs William b. Cochran,
Madame Cochran, Mrs. Lehman, Lieut.
Eugene Lohman, Madame Rock wood,
Lieut. and Mrs. Alfred S. lockwood.
Lieut. and Mrs Carl A. Hardigg, Mad
anne Pearson, Mrs Edward Fuller Wit
sell, Mrs. Charles H. Wyman. Lieut.
Stephen II. MacGregor and Lieut.. Col.
end Mrs DashielI Madame Cochran
held the highest score at the SOC
table while Mrs. lockwood and Lieut.
MacGregor held the highest honors in
bridge. Later in the evening deli
cious supper was served at the small
tables at which the guests had been
playing.
Capt and Mrs. Arthur r. Dalton
he'd rs dinner guests on Sunday Capt
and Mrs lie Vergne S. Gregg and Miss
Elizabeth Gregg of Schofield Bar.
racks.
Mics Anne Grey Hawkins Of Soho
field barracks was the house-guest of
Maj AMI Mrs. Guy G. Palmer over
5unday
a -
The many friends OF Capt. and Mrs.
Thomas l.. Crystal will be glad to
know that, they returned from their
trip 70 the mainland on the last trans
l'ort end will also be pleased to know
that Capt Crystal has entirely recov.
cred from his recent Illness.
Lieut.. and Mrs. Ralph C.. Holiday
entertained at dinner In their home in
the caftonment on Sunday for Miss
Ruth Tubes of Honolulu and Lieut..
Stephen H. MacGregor.
Lieut.-Gol. and Mrs. William r.
DashielL entertained in their home in
the main garrison on Thursday even
jnx inStheir usual hospitable manner.
Shasta daisies were gracefully inter
Honolulu star-bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1912-2010, 1916-11-18

Another dinner that was given be-
fore the KalakaGa reception on Thurs
day evening was when Lieut. and Mrs.
Ralph c. Holiday entertained for
Mai and Mrs. William B. Cochran and
Mrs Hugh Harrison If rs Angeles
Honolulu star-bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1912-2010, 1916-11-18

Mai. and Mrs. Ohio B. Rosenbaum
entertained informally at dinner Oh
Sunday. in their home in the mair
garrison, for Mrs. Thomas j. Camp
Honolulu star-bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1912-2010, 1916-11-18

Lieut.. and Mrs. Ralph c. Holiday
entertained at dinner In their home in
the cantonment on Sunday for Miss
Ruth ,Tubbs of Honolulu and Lieut.
Stephen II. MacGregor.
Honolulu star-bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1912-2010, 1916-11-18

Capt. and Mrs. Arthur r. Dalton
he'd rs dinner guests on Sunday Capt
and Mrs. lie Vergne S. Gregg and Miss
Elizabeth Gregg of Schofield Bar.
racks.
Crittenden record-press. [volume] (Marion, Ky.) 1909-191?, 1916-02-10
COMMISSIONERS SALE.
Crittenden Circuit Court, Kentucky

c. j. PIERCE. Pr.
Against Equity.
c. c. TURNER, DIT.
BY virtue OF a Judgment and Order
Of Sale Of the Crittenden Circuit Court
rendered at the Nov term thereof.
1915. in the above cause for the sum
OF $4,000 with interest at the rate Of
6 per cent per annum from the 9th
day Of April, 1913. until paid. and
$500 costs herein, | shall proceed to
offer for sale at the Courthouse door
in Marion TO the highest bidder, at
PUBLIC AUCTION on Monday, the
lith day Of teb. 1916. at one o'clock
p. m. or thereabout, (being County
Court dag, upon a credit Of three
months the following described proper
ty. to-wit
One bay horse eleven years old.
named Morgan. known as the Alley
Hughes horse,
One gray mare mule, fourteen years
old. named Polly.
One black Jersey COW. three years
old.
Or sufficient thereof to produce the
sums Of money so ordered TO be made.
For the purchase price the purchaser,
with approved security or securities
must execute Bond, bearing legal m.
terest from the day Of sale until paid.
and having the force and effect Of a
judgement. Bidders will be prepared
TO comply promptly with these terms.
j. G.. ROCHESTER,.
Commissioner
Crittenden record-press. [volume] (Marion, Ky.) 1909-191?, 1916-02-10
PROMINENT RAILROAD MAN
CURED OF STOMACH TROUBLE

Mr. 7. X Wit. city passenger agent
Of the Pennsylvania Lines. has his
Office In the Insurance Exchange
Building. Chicago.
lie vas for some time n great SUI.
ferer from stomach trouble. After Try.
ing various medicines and prescrip-
tons without results. he resolved TO
see what Mayrs Wonderful Remedy
would do for him. This Is what he
wrote TO Mr.. Mayr after taking several
bottles:
4 wish to let you know OF the good
] derived from your Wonderful Rem.
Ciy and would have done so ere this
but was waiting 70 see II there would
be any return Of the evil suffered be.
fore using your remedy but up 10 the
present time ] am feeling better than
| have for a great many years
i can fully recommend this rem.
edy and will always DO 30, and will
personally explain 10 any one who viii
apply 10 me my condition before TAX.
ing your remedy"
Mayrs Wonderful Remedy gives
ornament results FOR stomach. liver
and intestinal ailments. Eat as much
and whatever you like No more Dis
tress after eating, pressure a. gas In
the stomach and around the heart Get
ONE bottle o. your druggist nov aud
try q on an absolute guarantee II not
satisfactory money will De returned
Crittenden record-press. [volume] (Marion, Ky.) 1909-191?, 1916-02-10

Mrs. Lacy Moore is the guest Of her
daughter. Mrs. Walter Griffith. at
Marion, Ill.
Frank Belt entertained number Of
his frieuds at supper Jan. 18th, it be-
ing his twenty-frst birthday.
Misses Grace and Matte Lindsey
expect to attend school at Bowling
Green when this school is out.
Miss Addie Franks received word
last week that her nephews, John.
Reed and Haschol Franks. Of Greedy.
Col, were returning to Kentucky,
John being quite i'll. They are sons Of
the late Rev. ]. j. Franks, and went
TO Colorado last fall hoping TO recu-
perate their health.
STALLION MOORE.
Nurse Stallion and Miss Rose More
were united in marriage at Tolu, KY.
Jan. 26'h. by their pastor Rev. A.
Register. They were accompanied by
Will Todd and Miss Stella Phillips.
Immediately after the ceremony they
returned TO the home Of the brides
parents Mr.. and Mrs. P. c. Moore. Of
the Glendale neighborhood, where the
following named enjoyed a splendid
supper:-Mr. and Mrs. 2. c. Moore.
Mr.. and Mrs. W. c. Moore and son.
Misses Cora Moore, Stella Phillips,
Mae and Mamie Hughes, Eula Jacobs.
Matte Lucas, Allie Thomas and Marie
Moore. Mcssrs. Ebert and Ray
Thomas and viii Todd.
The bride is the youngest daughter
Of Mr. and Mrs. p c. Moore, and Is a
lovable Christian girl, and talented
musician. The groom is the youngest
son Of the late Alex Stallion. and is an
Industrious farmer. Both number their
friends by the score who wish them
the best there is in life.
They will soon go to house. keeping
on his farm in the Glendale neighbor.
hood.
Crittenden record-press. [volume] (Marion, Ky.) 1909-191?, 1916-02-10
Valuable Load OF Tobacco
Stuck Fast In Mud Hole.

A load Of tobacco estimated to
BE- worth $3.50. is stuck In a mud
hole on a road near Cairo. with
the water standing almost 10 the
top Of the wagon bed.
The tobacco belongs to a Mr..
Co.ey, of near Tjlden. H. start
ed 20 the city Friday with the
weed. When near Cairo mis- team
stalled and could not bulge the
load from the mud in which it
seemingly was firmly stuck, and
eight good mules failed to move
the wagon.
The raa F.#gg night started
the N letuIi.ug in the road
and d, Is SAID Saturday morning
the water was almost over the
top Of The wagon.
NJ CH'ay was in the city Fri
day night and Il quoted as say
ing The 'oldoftahacco was worth
$3.50 - Henderson Cleaner.
Crittenden record-press. [volume] (Marion, Ky.) 1909-191?, 1916-02-10
TEN KILLED IN Yep.
PELiN RAID OVER PARIS
Huge Aircraft Drops Thirty Bombs
In the Cily-Thirly Gil.
liens Wounded.

Paris. Feb A German Iep.
peiIn appear % r.rr Plu.atg-O
O'Clock touienr II dropped a
dozen bombs MInng ten people
and wounding thirty.
At $50 o'clock Paris was com.
pletely darkened in anticipation
Of the Zeppelin raid. Fire en-
gines and trumpeters went thru
the streets sounding the alarm.
Searchlights were put in oper.
alton and noise of aeroplanes
was heard in the air. At that
time but TWO shots had been
heard but il IS unknown whether
they were from approaching Zen.
pelins or from anti-air craft
guns.
Crittenden record-press. [volume] (Marion, Ky.) 1909-191?, 1916-02-10

A.. H
been 81
CT
Henri
nice q
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II. Ri
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View. {
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leave
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N barn
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Crittenden record-press. [volume] (Marion, Ky.) 1909-191?, 1916-02-10
LOYD'S BRAIN LEAKS.
by F. $. LLOYD:

DIR. Moore says, A dainty dash Of
color improves a girls looks and there
is no harm in it. but the trouble is that
the drugstores sells the color 10y the
box. and a g'rl imagines she has to use
the entire box at one application.
Carloss Oakley said; "Pa, is biga-
mist a man who has one wife too
many"
mot necessarily. my son. lots Of
men who have one wife too many are
not bigamist. Replied his father.
Mrs. Oakley said: Carlos if you
don't quit asking your father questions
you will be as big foo a. he Is. l."
Oscar Hibbs says. 1t $ easy enough
to be popular when you have the CON
but always remember that when you
are broke you are almost as popular as
the smallpox.
Uncle Dock Green started out to
quote some poetry. IL ran IKE TINS:
"The man who fights and runs away.
May live TO fight some other day.
IL he can outrun the fellow who is af-
ter him."
Mrs. Albert Elder says, ! always
hate to hear my husband snoring. |
know it keeps him from talking IN his
sleep.
Ed Baker says, A man wants hat
like other men are wearing; but a
woman gets mad II she sees another
woman wearing a hat ,hIt Is ike her'.
Uncle Billy LLOYD .ulyines tha, he
il the main queeze 10 hi home, but
just the same hi4 wife always saves
out the beat towels, the ina and the
Crittenden record-press. [volume] (Marion, Ky.) 1909-191?, 1916-02-10

best linen for company.
Newt Dollar says, II Is a mighty
lucky thing for some Of cur girls that
their faces do not look anything like
their elbows.
Darby Wyatt says. Forgetting to
mail the letter your wife gave you,
isn't the most serious mistake in lie.
Forgetting to burn the letter some 9th.
er woman sent you. is the most serious
mistake.
j. B. Ray says. A man likes to give
a party because he can invite his friends
and make them happy. A woman
likes to give a party so she can make
her enemies unhappy by not inviting
them