The Ontario Argus. (Ontario, Or.) 1???-1947, 1916-06-29
THE DEMOCRATIC PLATFORM

THE DEMOCRATIC PLATFORM
The wir"s informed hs that the
ptesidont wrote the plat ,r1i for his
party this year. We can well believe
u. 80 crude mechanics for that Job.
The first thing was to pat himself
self IN the back for his achieve
mems during the past three year,
He did rot mention hinrtN. but as
- las bo aCd the whol, bui incss, b"
could have meant no one else. Then
he pulls the record of those achieve
me.ts. The first duty Is 20 endorse
tho administration OF Woodrow VIII
son That was easy. Descending
to details, the first thing called up
to be praised Is the way Il has kept
tile pledges OF the 1912 platform.
Did that mean the one-term pledge,
the cheaper living pledge, the free
tolls for coast shipping through the
Panama canal, the more economy In
the administration. the assurances
that no legitimate business need fear
disturbance. the needed merchant
marine without either bountles or
subsidies, or what?
The teacher told the boy that she
feared he had a poor memory. The
boy replied that he had first-class
forgotten. IL In queer that one In
stlnctively recalls that incident while
reading this platform.
Il next arraigns the republican
party for not having corrected many
abuses. However. In the hurry of
the moment II forget to mention that
the democrats In both houses OF con-
gress had stood for ten years In solid
phalanx and voted against every re-
form proposed by the republicans.
Next Il praises the financial legis-
lation OF the democracy. II forgets
that II was easy TO make those
changes after the results OF the AL
drich commission that had been
working on those problems for four
years were made known.
Then the Underwood tariff is en-
dorsed In It's fullness, That Is the
finest exhibition OF nerve presented
in the platform. II will be discussed
plenty during the campaign. II is
only necessary at present 10 call the
peoples attention TO its endorsement
as sufficient notice TO them that the
genuine Bourbon never forgets any
thing, never learns anything.
Then Americanism is expounded
and all that inspires is the question
OF when the American people began
to look to the democracy for defini-
ton OF what Americanism means.
And was the president behind this
lAmericanism ever aroused TO its i'm
portance. until the demand for some
slogans for this campaign became
imminent?
And the same question arises when
the plank on preparedness is read.
When did the craze for preparedness
become epidemic with the democracy
before The danger of invasion has
been as imminent every minute for
the past ten years as il is now. Why
put up the danger signals and send
out the S, o. S, call just now. Viye
la Humbug!
International relations are next
discussed.
/ That is TO laugh.
And the dissertation on Mexico
leaves one in that hysterical condi-
tion that he does not know whether
TO laugh or cry.
Then after the experience of the
past two years. this platform dares
to discuss the American merchant
marine and confidently predict that
the pending shipping bill in congress
will restore II. Great God!
II was natural for the president
10 get down and grasp the horny
handed son OF toll, the farmer, by
the hand. The president is a good
deal of a farmer himself His pet
crop is votes. He believes they can
be grown in any soil or climate
without any regard to "winter kill'
or rust" or insects" and so sure
is he that they are the only product
he has provided transportation to
market for, That plank is about the
checklist one in the platform.
The platform praises the acumen
OF establishing an income tax, but
forgets to mention that every extra
dollar obtained from IL has been lost
In the general expense account of the
party.