davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1916-11-16

Marked Improvement has of late
teen shown in activities at the Young
Mems Christian association" remark ed
W. II. Cosby, chairman of the board.
"The recent cold wave, of course,
has naturally had the effect of spur
ring up the youthful vigor of the mem
bership, and young men In great num-
bers are now flocking to the central
association building TO avail them
selves of the hot showers and baths;
and for the past month or So steadily
increasing interest has been mani
tested in the varied and useful prac-
teal work in all departments of thu
Birmingham institution.
Among the moro recent and most
popular innovations at the ~ were
the enrolment Of the greatest night
school on record. and the enlarge
ment of the cafeteria or lunch room, so
as that the seating capacity has been
practically doubled. Everything is
booming at the ~ and in my judg-
ment, will continue to realize the man
fold benefits to e derived from cell
lective cooperative work.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1916-11-16
OLD HOME OF WASHINGTONS

The only parts Of the building in good
repair are those parts which time has
not yet succeeded in destroying. The
drawing room. containing a mantelpiecs
given to Washington by Lafayette. and
the finest wood paneling have seen in
any American house, has held its own
fairly well, as has also the old stairway,
imported by Washington from England
But that these things are not In ruins,
like the porches, Is no credit to this
Washingtons who own the property to-
day, and who. having rented tho place,
actually leave family portraits hanging
on the walls to crack and rot through this
cold winter.
If there are indeed five thousand Wash
ingtons, and if they are proud of thelt
descent, good way for them to show II
would be to contribute % cents each to b
expended on putting Harewod In respect
able condition.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1916-11-16
LUKE MLuKE SAYS

man will go around nursing the
idea that other people are in cahoots
against him to keep him down, when the
fact of the matter is that other people
do no even know that he is on earth.
Every good housekeeper has a set OF
hand embroidered pillow slips that father
never gets to use and never even sees
unless mother has company.
Once in a while you will find man
who Is SO contrary that he will sharpen
pencil at the gilt-lettered end
No matter how absent-minded a man
may be he never forgets to laugh at his
own jokes.
When argument or force fails with a
woman flattery will always win her over
girl doesn't worry about being in
Jured in case the automobile in which
she is riding should turn turtle. But
she thinks how awful it would be il
she had holes in her stockings wher
the accident occurred.
The trouble about letting your wife
know when you have had your salar,
raised is that she will take more than
it amounts to.
Every time we read of man over
so years of age marrying again we gel
the idea that there amt no such ami
NAL as the age of discretion.
After an article gets SO cheap anf
SO common that you can afford to buy
it you discover that you do not need il
as badly as%you thought you did when
you couldn't afford 1T.
The wonders of nature amaze thu
thoughtful man. Who but nature
would have thought to grow fly
swatter on the rear end of a horse?
A woman has heap of sense abou
some things. But she can't understand
why she could go without anything az
long as she can order 1t and have IL
charged.
When you meet a fat woman who
has managed to lose four ounces she
thinks that you are no gentleman UNI
less you notice how slender she is get
ting without having her call your at
tention to the fact.
The fellow who is smoking a ciga
rette made out of fine-cut socks always
wonders how the other fellow who Ii
smoking a cigarette made out of gran
ulated overshoes can stand the smell.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1916-11-16
Keep Up the Fight

81 understand that the government
has sent a man from the bureau OF
mines to Europe to investigate their
methods of making nitrate from the
air." said former Governor Emmet
O'Neal yesterday. "Of course this has
no bearing on the matter OF location
for the nitrate plant, but it shows that
our government has planned to go into
the matter in the most thorough way,
and that nothing will be left undone
in the way of securing information
Personally, I am glad to see so
much interest being shown in the To-
cation of the nitrate plant in this
state. While I do not think it hardly
possible that Muscle Shoals will not
get the plant, still it is we'll to prepare
and Alabamians should keep up the
fight and aid in every possible way to
help get the plant for this location.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1916-11-16
CHOCOLATE SOLDIERS

From the Cleveland Plain Dealer.
m ERNARD SHAW wrote an ad-
lN mirable play about military "trip
- peries in tho Balkans. 1t was
made over into an opera, 1.-THE Choco-
late Soldier" so-called because its hero
carried chocolate caramels in his cart
ridge box Bulgaria was the locale of
the Shaw play and of the opera But
any other Balkan state would have done
as well.
Since the writing Of the play and the
production of the opera the Balkan
states have shown the world that they
know how to fight. If they had any
peace time Chocolate soldiers" they be-
came brave and grimy gunpowder SOL
diers in time of war. Bulgaria, Greece,
Servia, Montenegro all proved their met
tie in the war against Turkey and the
war against each other.
The only state of southeastern Eu-
rope which did not get "a taste of real
war in those days was Rumania. With
rare sagacity she Joined tho Graceo-
Serbo-Montenegrin coalition against Bull
garia after Bulgaria had done the lions
share in the war against Turkey; but
Greece and Servia did all the fighting
against their recent ally, while Rumania
merely came in for her share of the
spells.
So it is clear that when Rumania, Joined
the great European war neither the Ru-
manian army nor the present generation
of Rumanians had any first hand knowl-
edge of real war. Her early successes,
her later reverses, and her present very
great danger have brought to light the
fact that Rumania possesses, or pos
sessed, a considerable number of "choco-
late soldiers" in positions Of high i'm
portance. The Bucharest government has
officially admitted as much, and has
made the announcement in an official
bulletin which is one Of the most re-
markable documents of the war.
"A number of superior officers of the
Rumanian army" says the report Of the
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1916-11-16

! minister of war, "have demonstrated
their inability to fulfill their tasks, and.
further, have openly showed cowardics
in manner fatal to military discipline,
Therefore it is announced that General
Dragotescu and Majors 'Chebach and
Balschensku have been removed from the
army lists and ungraded. More names
will be published"
1t is the policy of the greater powers
to let their incompetent commanders
down as easily as possible. Great Brit
ain llonored French and Hamilton; Ger
many exacted no great penalty from Won
Kluclk; France Is still unwilling to ad-
NIT the incompetency of Sarrail. None
of these men are accused OF cowardice,
recall. without excuse and without pal
liation, should be the punishment of in
efficiency. The first French republic won
most of its battles; it established an un-
written law that a general who lost a
battle must be guillotined. That is too
harsh for this generation; but royal
honors bestowed on such incompetents
as Frencn ana hamilton Is the opposite
extreme, and almost equally reprehen-
sible.
Possibly Rumania has found the right
way to deal with ornamental chocolate
soldiers who are warlike in time of
peace and incompetent in time of war
Ungrading them and publishing their
names to all the world is heartless. no
doubt; but war is heartless, and when
a nation is fighting for existence heart
lessness of this kind Is more than OK
cusable. 1t is desirable
Doubtless every belligerent nation OF
Europe has it's Dragotescu. its Balschen-
sku, it's Chebach. But instead of adj
vertising them it has either given them
posts of honor in some safe place or has
retired them honorably from service
The fourteenth nation alone is honest
enough to admit its possession of "choco-
late soldiers and brave enough to pub
lish their shame.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1916-11-16
ADRIF'T WITH THE Tim
WARS IMITATION.

Oh, the carnage in the trenches
But the battles on the gridiron,
While they're not SO sanguinary,
Yet t' wbene,s @t the he goal is threatened
"a Aii1 me rne ngnling Dloou 10 "Aiiiieo'
And a life seems little worth,
CASE OF POOR JUDGMENT.
you are charged with being intoxi-
Gated"
Your honor l was only paying freak
election bet"
What do you mean, SIR"
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1916-11-16
TWO JEWISH GOVERNORS

From the Youngstown Telegram
One of the very interesting develop
ments of the election is the defeat of
the Mormon candidate for governor in
Utah and the candidate who presume
bly, had the Mormon support in Idaho.
In both cases the successful candidates
are prominent members of the Hebrew
race and in both cases they had the
solid support of the "Gentiles," as all
non -Mormons are called in the Mormon
states.
Incidentally this is another illustra-
ton of the large part which the Jew
plays today in our political life. With
men like the Strauses. Ochs, Morgen-
lthau and Brandeis. leaders in the east,
and Bamberger in Utah and Alexan-
der in Idaho, it is clear that old racial
preiudices cut vastly less figure in pub
lie and private affairs in America than
they did few years ago. This is as
|it should be. In the United States every
man ought to stand or fall on his merit
a a man and citizen and for no other
reason.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1916-11-16

Julian Street in Collier Weekly.
m AMUEL WASHINGTON. described
~ as "a rolicking country squire" was
~ several years short of so when he
died, but for all that had managed to
marry five times and to find spare mo-
ments in which to lay out the historic
estate of Hardwood not far from Charlesf
town, w. Va 1t Is said that George
Washington was his brothers partner IN
this enterprise, but excepting In It's IN
terror, which is very beautiful, there Is
no sign about the building of his graceful
architectural touch.
George Washington spent much time
at Hardwood. Lafayette and his son
visited there and there the sprlghtly
widow, Dolly Todd, married James Maoi-
son. This welding was attended by Pres
ident Washington and his wife ana by
many other national figures; the BRIDE
made the journey to Hardwood In JeHer-
sons coach. escorted by Madison and
group of his friends on horseback, and
history makes mention Of very large
and very gay company
This is all very we'll until you sea
Harewood for, substantial though the
house is, with it's two-foot stone walls,
IT has but five rooms-two downstairs and
three up.
Where did they all sleep?
The question was put by the practical
young lady whom accompanied to Hare
wood, but the wife Of the farmer to whom
the place is rented could only smile and
shake her head.
The bedroom now occupied by this
farmer and his wife has doubtless been
occupied also by the first President of
the United States and his wife, the
fourth President and his wife. by La
fayette and by a King of France-for
Louis Philippe and his brothers, the DUO
de Montpensier and the Comte de Beau
jolois, spent sometime at Hardwood dur
ing their period of exile.
Having read in an extract from the Bal
timore Sun that Hardwood, which is still
owned in the Washington family, was a
place in which all Washingtons took great
and proper pride, that it was "the load
stone which draws the wandering Wash,
ingtons back to the old haunts," 1 was
greatly shocked on visiting the house to
sea the shameful state of dilapidation
into which it has been allowed to pass.
The porches and steps have fallen down,
the garden is dsreputable tangle. and
the graves in the yard are heaped with
tuinbledovn stones about which the cat
tie Craze
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1916-11-16
BOOK BY MARK TWAIN
m the New York Telegram.

From the New York Telegram.
THE mysterious stranger" new
book by Mark Twain, recently brought
to light, will soon be published 1t is
a story of the supernatural. Against the
Gothic background of small Austrian
village, at the end of the sixteenth CEN
tury--with a halo of the towns bene-
factor-stands the Mysterious Stranger,
one of the most extraordinary figures
Mark Twain ever drew.
He makes friends with three boys
and shows them many marvels. At
times he is visible, but his presence,
seen or unseen, always brings to those
about quickened feeling, and his
magic causes lives to run into new and
unexpe ted channs
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1916-11-16

The enormous crowds attending the
feature picture, The Common Law,
demonstrates the fact the public is par
tial to pictures that are produced on a
lavish SCALE said B. H. Mooney, well
known publicfst. "Since the opening per-
Torrance of this picture the crowds at
the Rialto have taxed the capacity of
the house.
CLARA Kimball Young, In the leading
part, is an unusually popular actress of
great ability. She is considered one OF
the foremost opponents of the screen
art today. The book, by Robert w.
Chambers, caused a. furore when it was
published few years ago. The theme
being different and novel adds to the
interest of the spectators"
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1916-11-16
Oysters Plentiful

THE cool weather has caused a great
many people who are fond of oysters to
try them for the first time this season, :"
said Peter Lemanos, night manager of
Chriss' cafe There are any number
of people who will never eat oysters
as long as the weather is warm.
ANY month which has an ~ In the
spelling of it is seasonable for oysters
One will find that September is the
first month in the fall that has the letter
~ in it. From then until April, the last
month of the season, the biva1ves are
good to eat. The recent storms on the
gulf coast destroyed quite number OF
oyster beds. Despite this fact, we are
not experiencing great deal of trou-
BILE in getting very fine plants" from
the coast"
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1916-11-16
SWEET AND Low

By Tennyson.
Sweet and low, sweet and low,
Wind of the western sea;
Low, low breathe and blow,
Wind of the western sea!
over the rolling waters go,
Come from the dying moon, and bloS
Blow him again to me;
While my little one, while my prctt
one, sleeps.
Sleep and rest, sleep and rest:
Father will come to thee soon.
Rest. rest on mothers breast
Father will come to thee soon.
Father will come to his babe in II
nest
Silver sails all out Of the west
Under the silver moon!
Sleep, my little one; sleep. my pret'
one, sleep.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1916-11-16
FARMERS Urged to
increase Production

I'd RESIDENT WILSON in his adj
Is dress before the National
Grange yesterday blamed middlemen
for the high cost of foodstuffs and
insisted that the best way to meet
such conditions as now confront this
country is to increase production. The
President is not a farmer, but he
knows something of statistics and his
remarks were so practical as to i'm
press favorably the public in general
as we'll as his granger audience. "In
the future" he said, 1--WE have got
to bring more of the area of the United
States under cultivation than is under
cultivation now. We have got to in
crease the production at every point
where it is susceptible of being in
creased"
In years past this country has some
times produced greater surplus than
was needed for export, but the demand
at home and abroad increases in every
decade and the time will come and
come soon when a six billion bushel
corn crop, a two billion-bushel wheat
crop and million-bu Irish potato
crop will be barely enough to satisfy
consumers; that is to say those crops
must be doubled or more than doubled
as compared with crops in recent high
record years. And here is where mans
energy and ingenuity and applied
science must of necessity combine to
accomplish these things.
President Wilson called attention to
recent legislation of benefit to the
farmer, and wondered why it had not
been done before. at is astonishing"
he said, "the valuable available assets
of the farm should not have been
available as basis of credit in the
banks on the same terms as the as
sets of commercial undertaking and
manufacturing industry. Cattle are
just as visible and tangible as goods
! in warehouses or goods on trains. We
have liberated the credits of the banks
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1916-11-16

and we have modified, though the
department of agriculture, the scien-
tific intelligence of the world. With
that combination every nation in the
world ought to come to US to learn
how to raise big crops"
AS helpful as the rural credits acts,
providing for farm loan banks, Will
prove to be, the demonstration work
along scientific lines under the direc-
ton of the agricultural department
is equally as beneficent. The demo-
cratic party must have credit for TAX
ing broader view of the Secretary of
Agriculture's activities than the re-
pubIicans had done. This Sixty-fourth
Congress has increased the appropria-
tons for the department by several
million dollars. And so great will be
the results that no Congress will ever
think of cutting down the amount.
Every Alabama farmer is benefited
by the departments demonstration
agents and thousands of them will be
benefited by the farm loan bank.
These helps will enable the ambitious
and progressive husbandman in this
state, as in other states, to do what
President Wilson suggests, raise more
foodstuff and do it at less expense
per acre than had been the rule in
the past.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1916-11-16
IF HE WAS KING OF NEW YORK

IF HE WAS KING OF NEW YORK
From the New York Herald.
A modest sculptor, telling dining
club what he would do to New York "
he were king. says he "would demolisf
all houses between Sixth and Seventh
avenues Washington Square and West
chester county. then build great bou'
levard and erect at each end tremeni
dous damned buildings as halls of fame
for the illustrious dead of the nation
1t is difficult to prophesy what thu
remainder of the population would de
in such an event, but it is likely tina
the sovereign's encourage would sooi
sing God Save the King from the Tax
payers" and make an early reservation
for place in one Of the "tremendoul
domed buildings"
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1916-11-16
Talk of Peace
In Warning Europe

I'm Warning Europe
ID PREDICTIONS are being freely
Is made that the war will end in
1917. But there is little more basis for
these predictions than there was for
the belief that peace would certainly
be declared during the summer of
1916. 1t is true that the belligerents
will be nearer the point of exhaustion
next year, but not appreciably so.
There will yet be vast sums of money
and millions of men left to carry on
he struggle indefinitely.
If the war ends in 1917, if will hard
" be the result of a decisive blow
struck by either side, although that is
possible. The statesmen Of Europe
may realize the utter folly Of fight
ng any longer and declare for peace.
Germany, for obvious reasons, has
been willing to quit for sometime,
contingent on the terms offered. At
present, there is no likelihood of the
allies making any concessions Of that
nert to the central powers. They are
still, apparently, obsessed with the
idea that Germany must be crushed.
The progress thus far has been slow
and dubious.
The Teuton armies still hold thou
sands of miles of conquered territory
with vast mineral and agricultural
wealth. The fact that Emperor Will
liam and Emperor Francis Joseph set
up pasteboard Kingdom of Poland
the other day is viewed in Germany
and Austria as further proof that the
Teuton armies are unbeaten and do
not anticipate defeat.
While the civilized world stands
aghast at the sacrifices already made
to the war god and prolonged blood
shed is unthinkable, it is doubtful
whether peace made next year would
be permanent. Unless some great ant
unexpected developments change the
political and econ~naic situation in
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1916-11-16
QUITE A DISTINCTION.

Those Calder girls have so much pow.
der on their faces they look as If they
had Just come out of flour barrel"
"oh, well. That's mark of affluencs
these days At the present price, any
body who comes into close contact with
a barrel of flour must have money"
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1916-11-16

Rev. Mir. Sunday
lis Busy I'm Boston

0NSYe Avail ~ $50 oSSS'S
Is Busy I'm Boston
TMILLY SUNDAY has started a
Id ten-weeks' campaign in Boston,
using a tabernacle that seats approx
imately 10000 people and is said to
be the largest ever erected for him.
His first three services were attended
by $4,000 people.
The idea of spectacular evangel-
list of the Sunday type preaching IN
Boston is bizarre, to say the least. He
must seem passing strange to the
SNUG and more or less cultured
dwellers in a city which is styled
Club of the Universe" and is sup
posed to look on a split infinitive with
horror
Mr.. Sunday in his opening remarks
used such picturesque words as
NUTS" "dubs," "mollycoddles," Eek
cess baggage" "fourflushers" and
others from a slang vocabulary that
seems linitless. A veracious newspa-
per correspondent says, "The audience
at times applauded mildly and occa-
sionally from the masses came shouts
of Thank God, praise HimI' but most
of the time the thousands sat still and
mute, apparently amazed by the
strangeness of it ALL"
Mr.. Sunday has started in to give
Boston run for it's money" He
never was daunted by high-brows and
the way he flayed Boston deacons
shows that he has lost none of his
old-time spirit. The Club" is going
to get the worst shaking up it ever
had.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1916-11-16

BEGINNING THE DAY--o my
God, how mysterious are Thy ways
with me! Thou givest me weakness
that Thou mayest make me strons'
Thou Ieadest me into the dark 10
show me a great light. Thou water
est my couch with tears that l may
learn a better gladness. folo"
Thee, for Thou wilt not make me
. ashamed. Amen.-H. M. E.
The Birmingham age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1902-1950, 1916-11-16
MAYBE.

Come, shed a tear for Potsdam-
It's had unwelcome news;
You know, twas said that Potsdam
Was very strong for Hughes.