Connecticut western news., 1916-03-23
The Wurra Wurra Club

It was a wierd, uncanny sort of night-dark, clustering, cold and spooky-just the kind of night you or I would pick out to rob a hen-roost, or steal a horse, or burn an orphan asylum, or cut a throat, or blow up hospital; when conscience doth make towards of us most all, and the villain still pursues her. The opening hour was late in arriving, owing to the sexton neglecting to set the clock, which made it all the more so when it did arrive, though nobody in particular was at fault, on the principle that in the final analysis the fact must always be considered that patience is a virtue and "they also wait who only stand and serve." Therefore be it sufficient that although the hour was late in ar- irving, it arrived-in other words, it got there just the same. Whereupon the president, MT. Talbot O. Freeman, the astute tutor, whose tuting is of high order, called the meeting to order on the first degree and commanded that the roll be called without further haste, and it was so called. The read ing of the minutes of the previous meeting was dispensed with, on the ground that they contained nothing that the members didn't know. The Opening Ode was sung ill falsetto by Allyn Fuller, accompanied by Howard Slats on his vacuum steak toaster, after which-oh, after which: Mir. k. A. Creevey got up and said he thought the Club ought to have slogan contest, similar to the one that had just been so successfully pulled off by the Business Mems Association.
 "Does the gentleman offer that as motion, or anything" inquired Chair man Freeman.
 "Oh, no; far from it." replied Mir. Creevey. ''I offer it as one of those tin things the cook has, to keep things in"
 ''I am in favor of the gentleman's idea," said Al. Herriman, rising to his little feet. "The Club should have a slogan-a catch-phrase that would ex- press the purpose and ideas for which it stands; and in order to get the views of the members present, I. move that this Club start a slogan contest and offer as prize a $25 gold piece for the best slogan submitted. I'll furnish | the gold piece"
 The fat member stood up. "Mr. | Pres dent, I 'bject," said he. "That other slogum contest set a hull lot O folks t workin' their brains out f'r nothin'. My wife sent in a half a dozen slogums, so's t' make sure she'd git that prize, am sue didn't even git a ..xg slogums, too. My sister. in.law put in a couple, an she got left jest as bad, am never seen nicer slogums in my life than hers was. Then there's her son, one O tn brightest boys ye ever see; he made up a lot O 'riginal slogums that ort t won tn prize, an he didn't git nowhere near that gold , piece. don't mind ownin' up that put one in, myself, that I knew dunn well was better'n anybody else's. Course, I, didn't expect t git tn prize, fir I only put it in t help out tn con. test; but dye think they'd give it t me? Not much. My slogum wasn't even mentioned in tn paper. O course I didn't care nothin' about it, but Pm posed t' slogum contests, on gin'ral principles. I 'bject t tn motion.''
 Clint. Roraback rose to ask if the fat member meant to reflect on the un- biased impartiality of the judges in the Business Mems slogan contest.
 The fat member got up again and said, "No, nothin' ain't luther firm my idee. only want t emphasize tn prop sition that slogum decisions is a matter O pussonal taste; that's all. But if this Club does git up slogum contest, I sh'll put in this one: Tn Wurra Wurra Club-th' butt-end of q squash. If that don't win I'll re. sign"
 Fred Collin rose to inquire if such a contest came under the ban of the law concerning games of chance.
 Judge Ford got up an offered to read chapter of the Statutes concerning games of chance, but just then the lights went out-nobody owned to knowing how or why, and there was nnthinu laft to dp hut ad iourn