davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Ward County independent. [volume] (Minot, Ward County, N.D.) 1902-1965, 1916-05-18
Tricked the Colonel,

Some Irishmen are nothing if not
ingenious. Here is good story told
of one, a terrible scamp serving in
South Africa under Colonel Hamilton
Browne. On discharge he asked for
a character and was given one by the
colonel SO bad as should ordinarily
have barred him from employment for
ever.
Some time later the colonel met him,
most prosperous man and about to
embark for the mother country.
But" said the colonel, chow was it
that people, reading such a character
as ! gave you should have been so
taken in?"
Read it," the scamp replied. "Never
one of them read it and for very
good reason, as not one of them could
read word Of English. It was the
lion and the unicorn fighting for the
crown on the top Of the official paper
that did the trick, and that's what |
wanted when I troubled you for a
character. So long, colonel. There's
the all for the shore bell ringing.
Good luck, and many thanks, as It's
through you I'm in for high old
time"
The Ward County independent. [volume] (Minot, Ward County, N.D.) 1902-1965, 1916-05-18
When ToIstox Tried to Ely.

From earliest childhood Tolstoy was
remarkably observant of the things
that were going on in the world around
him. Thus, while still in his teens, we
find him taking an interest in the art
Of flying that was too practical to suit
his devoted mother. With chara cteris-
tic thoroughness he invented design
Of his own and with equally character
istic courage proceeded to put it to an
Immediate test from a second story
window. But the boy who was after
ward to find food for thought for the
whole civilized world was not destined
to make his mark as an infant aero
pianist. He fell instantly to the ground,
and, though by great good fortune no
bones We're actually broken. the con
cussion was so great that young Toll
stoy afterward slept for sixteen hours
on end.
The Ward County independent. [volume] (Minot, Ward County, N.D.) 1902-1965, 1916-05-18
THE NORTHEAST PASSAGE.
Only Two Expeditions Succeeded In
Getting THROUGH II.

Most attempts of European countries
to find a compa ratively short passage
from the Atlantic to oriental countries
were by way of the northwest passage,
north of America, because, having first
tried the northeast passage, north of
Europe and Asia, and in every instance
having met with dire failure, they con-
centrated attention upon the northwest
passage as probably more feasible.
Practically all the arctic expeditions
from Sir John Ross to Sir John Frank
lin We're fitted out most of all to find
the northwest passage. The passage
was found during the search for the
lost party of Sir John Franklin, but
it was never traversed by ship till
Amundsen took his little boat. the
Gjoa, through it in August, 1905.
The attempts to make the northeast
passage began with the hardy Dutch
sailor Barents in 1895, whose party
was the first to spend the dark winter
night in the arctic Sin most create
cold and extreme miserie." The only
achievement of the northeast passage
prior to Vilkitskis success in 1914-15
was by Baron A. e. Nordensjold, who
sailed from Tromsoe with his Swedish
expedition in June, 1878, triumphed
over the great obstacle of Cape Chel-
yuskin and was within 120 miles of
Boring strait when winter closed. upon
him. He entered Boring strait in July,
1879, thirteen months from the time he
sailed.-Cyrus G. Adams in New York
Times.
The Ward County independent. [volume] (Minot, Ward County, N.D.) 1902-1965, 1916-05-18
Twain and the Rivermsn.

Mark Twain once told to party of
friends the following story on himself:
On one occasion when he started on
a trip down the Mississippi river on a
fatboat he was advised never to an
swer the questions asked by rivermen
on other boats and never to handy
words with them, as he would be sure
always to come out second best. He
followed the advice religiously for q
time, but one day he thought he saw a
chance to get the better Of riverman
who called out:
''Hey. thar, what yer loaded with?''
"Jackasses. Don't you want to come
aboard?' yelled back Twain.
That's whut reckoned SEEM as
how they let ther biggest donkey hey
ther run of the deck!' came back
Twain made a dive below as all the
rivermen in the neighborhood set up
derisive laugh at his expense.
The Ward County independent. [volume] (Minot, Ward County, N.D.) 1902-1965, 1916-05-18
- The
Scrap Book
Stuck to the Ethics.

A celebrated specialist once attend
ed young medical student through a
long illness. Though the embryo doc
tor knew that, according to profession
al etiquette, physicians do not accept
fees from each other, he felt that since
he was only student and had taken
so much Of the famous doctors valu-
able time he ought to request bill
for services rendered.
When he approached the matter,
however, the gruff old man spoke out
brusquely: Don't you know the eti-
quette? Dog doesn't eat dog"
Eyes, sir, I'm well aware of that" re-
piled the young fellow, but, you see,
I'm not a doctor. I'm only medical
student"
"Well, then, If you like it any better,
dog doesn't eat puppy!
The Ward County independent. [volume] (Minot, Ward County, N.D.) 1902-1965, 1916-05-18
SENDING A MAN BY MAIL.
lt Is Quite Possible Under British
Parcel Post Rules.

The parcel post has made it's useful
ness felt in many ways, unexpected as
well as foreseen. But the English par
eel post does one surprising thing that
has not yet been introduced into our
own system.
An Englishman wished to reach a
customer living in a remote part Of
BALKAN, one Of the suburbs OF London,
and it was very necessary that he find
him quickly. Knowing nothing Of the
district, he called at the general post
Office at St. Martin SIZE Grand to con-
suit a directory. On explaining his
case to clerk he was amazed to learn
that he could be sent to the address
by parcel post by paying a fee Of
threepence mile.
The gentleman had never heard Of
such a thing, and it IS said that very
few persons in England know that it
can be done. He was placed in charge
Of messenger who was familiar with
all parts Of the city and was soon on
his way. The boy carried a printed
slip on which was written descrip-
ton of the parcel in charge under
the heading article Required to Be
Delivered and before leaving the Gus
toner's house both the customer and
the gentleman had to put their sigma.
lures on the paper.
The limit in weight for anything de-
livered by parcel post in England is
generally understood to be eleven
pounds, but there Is one clause that
reads, "a person may be conducted by
express messenger to any address on
payment Of the mileage fee."-Youth's
Companion.
The Ward County independent. [volume] (Minot, Ward County, N.D.) 1902-1965, 1916-05-18
a Curious Relic.

A curious relic Of Louis XVII. is the
game of dominos' made Of pieces of
the Bastille which We're given to the
dauphin before he and his parents left
Versailles forever. 1t is said that
when the box containing it was
brought in the queen exclaimed to her
bedchamber woman, Nine. Campan,
What sinister plaything to give a
child" The sinister plaything is, with
other revolutionary objects, preserved
in Paris.
The Ward County independent. [volume] (Minot, Ward County, N.D.) 1902-1965, 1916-05-18
A Hot Weather Price.

Charley Murray, who manages sport
ing events at Buffalo, has positive
gift for expression in kilograms. he
keeps in touch with his friends by wire
with his enemies, too, sometimes.
During a midsummer hot spell he or
ganized a boxing carnival. Being anx-
ious to secure for one Of his ring at
fractions Ted Lewis, the English
fighter, he sent the following message
to Jimmy Johnston, manager of the
Britisher:
Hope the heat has not affected you.
Will give two-fifty for Lewis next
Tuesday night"
Johnston answered: Feeling fine.
Want one thousand for Lewis"
To which Murray promptly wired
back:
81 see the heat has affected YOU
Saturday Evening Post
The Ward County independent. [volume] (Minot, Ward County, N.D.) 1902-1965, 1916-05-18
Modified 1t.

Some university students ambitious
~ undertook to play Hamlet" for the
benefit Of charity. The man who was
to act the part Of Horatio was extreme
ly timid, and when the night Of the
performance came he was so overcome
by stage fright that he could hardly re
member the lines he had so carefully
studied During the scene where Ho-
ratio and Marcellus tell Hamlet of the
appearance Of the spirit Of his father
and the prince asks, Stayed 1t longY
while one with moderate haste might
tell hundred" Horatio managed to
stumble out, but SO confusedly that
Marcellus forgot his cue and instead Of
rejoining Longer, longer stood star
ing at Horatio. The prompter, with a
view to helping out Marcellus, began to
whisper from the wings, Longer.
longer" Unfortunately Horatio, hav-
ing lost all control Of himself, was in
spired with the idea that the man
playing MareelIus was looking at him
because he had made an error and that
the words from the wing were adj
dressed to him. With great effort he
Strengthened himself up, cleared his
burning throat and said loudly, while
one with moderate haste might tell
two hundred, then"
The Ward County independent. [volume] (Minot, Ward County, N.D.) 1902-1965, 1916-05-18

DO not talk about disgrace from a
thing being known when the disgrace
y that the thing should exist-Fal-
coner.
The Ward County independent. [volume] (Minot, Ward County, N.D.) 1902-1965, 1916-05-18
A Well Spent Day.

II you sit down at set of sun
And count the acts that you have done
And, counting, find
One self denying act, one word
That eased the heart of him who heard,
One glance most kind
That fell like sunshine where 1t went,
Then you may count that day well spent.
But if through all the livelong day
You've cheered no heart by yea or nay,
If through it all
You've nothing done that you can trace
That brought the sunshine to one face,
No act most small
That helped some soul and nothing cost,
Then count that day as worse than lost
The Ward County independent. [volume] (Minot, Ward County, N.D.) 1902-1965, 1916-05-18
Suits Some; Death to others.

Iron may be good for the blood of
some remarked the worm as the an
gler threaded the hook through him
gently, but fear it will be the death
of me-
And yet the fish that swallowed the
iron little later was quite carried
away with it.
The Ward County independent. [volume] (Minot, Ward County, N.D.) 1902-1965, 1916-05-18
Some Do II For NOTHING.

What did you say your business
wasp
II am critic"
you criticise people?'
You might say so, yes"
"And do you mean to tell me you get
paid for thatY Louisville Courier
Journal.
The Ward County independent. [volume] (Minot, Ward County, N.D.) 1902-1965, 1916-05-18
Unanimous.

Cricket How is your new book? Au-
thor Why, think it is punk, but my
publisher thinks it is better than my
last one. Cricket Cheer up: maybe
you are both right Judge
The herald and news. [volume] (Newberry S.C.) 1903-1937, 1916-08-22
NEWS OF ST PAUL'S.

St. Paul's, Aug. Is, 191S.-Miss
Novice Kibler returned home Monday
after spending several weeks visiting
relatives and friends.
Mr.. Hugh Epting left Saturday for
Columbia where he takes business
course in Macfeat's Business College.
We wish him success.
Miss Olga Dreher and brother,
Ernest, left last Tuesday for their
home in Charleston after spending
a short while with Mrs. R. E. Beden-
baugh. Misses Leola and "Annie-Ma
Bedenbaugh accompanied them.
ldr. Roy Young and Mr.. Ben Bes.
visited in the community last week.
Mr.. and Mrs. Henry Furr and family
Of Concord, N. c., and DR.. W. L Kb~
ler of Lexington, N. c., have returned
home after e brief stay with Mr.. w.
H. Kibler, Mr.. J. ]. Kibler went
with them and returned last Satur-
day. He reported better roads in the
old north state made by mixing clay
and sand. Why not try the same here
by bonding our state.
On Monday night, Aug. {, Mrs. J. ].
killer entertained a few young folks
in honor Of the visitors in the com
nGnity. Seven couples enjoyed rook
The herald and news. [volume] (Newberry S.C.) 1903-1937, 1916-08-22
NOTICE OF JURY DWAWING.

Notice is hereby given that We, the
undersigned Jury Commissioners for
New'berry county, S. c., will at the
Office of the Clerk oil Court for
Newberry county at nine o'clock a.
NJ, September lst, 1916, openly and
publicly draw the names of thirty
six (36) men, who shall serve as
Petit Jurors at the Court OF Common
Pleas, which will convene at Newberry
Court House September 18th, 1916,
and will continue for one week.
Chas. P. Barre,
Jas. B. Halfacre,
: Jno. G. Goggans,
Jury Commissioners for Newberry
County, S. C.
August, 21st, 1915.
The herald and news. [volume] (Newberry S.C.) 1903-1937, 1916-08-22

and afterwards, ice cream ana cake
vas served. All reported pleasant
time.
Election day will soon be here
Voters. consider we'll, your choice. In
your hands lie the future possibilities
81 d you are intrusted with the seal OF
our Posterfty.
The herald and news. [volume] (Newberry S.C.) 1903-1937, 1916-08-22
PINEY WOODS FARMERS
UNION ANNUAL PICNIC

Piney Woods Farahers Union will
hold their rnnual picnic ACgl ct 26
neer Piney Woods church The public
is cordially invited.
Following IS the p-c,Sram:
Winter Legumes-Mrs. J w. Shealy.
Best Methods for Building up the
Rural Schools-Rev. J. B. Harmon.
Rural Cooperative Creamery-Rev
J. L. Cromer.
Should the Public Highways be
The herald and news. [volume] (Newberry S.C.) 1903-1937, 1916-08-22

The Two-in-one feature day at the
Opera House Tuesdays is growing in
popularity. Only for Tuesdays the
night show begins at 1870. This is
owing to the lengthy program. which.
however, is for the same regular
price OF admission, always FIVE and ten
cents.
The herald and news. [volume] (Newberry S.C.) 1903-1937, 1916-08-22

Eciit and Maintained b. TaxatonI
Hon. C. VI. Efrd.
The Natural Resources of South
Carolina-Col. E. J. watson.
The herald and news. [volume] (Newberry S.C.) 1903-1937, 1916-08-22
NOTICE.

By virtue Of the power vested in
me by the authority given In a Dis
tress Warrant issued by B. v. Chap
nan, Agent for G. C. Boland, VS.. L. VI
Badham for rent in arrears, will
sell, at public auction, to the highes'
bidder for cash, on Friday, August
25th, 1916, at the house on the North
east coner of College and Johnstone
streets, in the town of Newberry, S.
c., formerly occupied by L. N. Bad
ham, at II o'clock in the forenoon,
the following goods and chattels, to
wit: 80. 49,,
straw .ttee, i straw rocker, 8
center tables, l arm chair, 6 leather
bottom chairs. & cane bottom chairs, !
round center table, art squares 9X13
arm rocker, 2 boys desks, barrel
OF china, ! box Of china, bed steads
and springs, l caild's crib, mattress
es, 10 large pillows, 8 holsters, 2 small
pillows. 9 blankets. 10 comforts, )
washstands, 8 dressers and contents
/ side board, ! dining table, cane
chairs. 2 rockers, / hall mirror and
towel rack, ! china closet. centre
table, box of knives, forks and
spoons, kitchen utensils, etc., chill
dren,s books, etc., winter suits and
coats, 10 rugs. hall and stair carpet.
Terms Of sale-Highest bidder for
cash.
Time of sale-Friday, August 25th,
1916, at IL O'Clock a. n.
Place Of sale-House in Newber-y,
S. c., on Northeast corner OF John
stone and College streets.
Pope L. Buford,
Agent.
The herald and news. [volume] (Newberry S.C.) 1903-1937, 1916-08-22
Miss Mary Da7kiAss
Gle State

Vhienaire, Aug. 17>-Miss Mary
Tawkins, a most estimable woman CT
Chester county, died at Whitmire Tues
Stay at the age Of 3S years. The fun
xral services were conducted at the
&benezer Methodis: Episcopal church
.&nv&AasResgVisllesgssfegp e&A& Chester
socanty yesterday. by the Rev. T. H.
&oaGh, pastor Of the Second Baptisi
The herald and news. [volume] (Newberry S.C.) 1903-1937, 1916-08-22
A. III. D A c. N AL l.
CANDIDATE FOR CONGRESS
Who Advocates:

Payment to the Confederate veterans of the money
collected by the Federal Government from the illegal TAX
on cotton.
A law prohibiting the iptermarriage of whites and
negroes in the city of Washington.
rural credit law which will enable the thrifty tenant
Ito own his own home.
The restriction of Immigration by stringent Jaws.
An army and navy Of sufficient strength to maintain the
}honos and dignity of the nation.
The enactment of laws that will make farming attractive
and profitable
Federal aid for public highways.
Federal inheritance tax.
Payment of pensions to old civil service employees
Strict enforcement of Civil Service rules
fair division of profits between capital and labor
The herald and news. [volume] (Newberry S.C.) 1903-1937, 1916-08-22
church of Chester.

CUU4CA OF NuGSIGI.
Miss Dawkins was a devoted mem
Der Of the Methodist church and was
always interested in good works and
She is survived by one brother. W.
g. Dawkins of-Lancasters and 1tRa, sis.
ters. Mrs. N. L. Austin OF Chester.
and Mra- John ". Gibson Of Whiemire.
The Cecil Whig. [volume] (Elkton, Md.) 1841-current, 1916-01-01
Children Cry
FOR FLETCHER'S
9 q 8 TX Fri q

Bishop Robert Randolph. of New
York, visited Grace Episcopal Church,
Haver de Grace, on December 10, and
confirmed a class of children.
Rev. Crosby Robertson, for two
years pastor of Cambridge Baptist
Church, has received a call to the Bap~
fist Church at Meanwhile, Va.
*Hives, eczema, itch or salt rheum
sets you crazy. Can't bear the touch
of your clothing. Doan's Ointment is
fine for skin itching. All druggists
sell it. SOC a box. adv
The Washington county commission
ers borrowed $4,000 for the county
school board to pay teachers salaries.
The marriage of Miss Helen Hunt
Chambers, daughter Of Mr.. and Mrs.
Samuel K. Chambers, West Grove. to
Professor James w. Crowe!l, Of STATE
College. son of James W. Crowell,
Avondale will take place Friday, De-
cember 81, at half-past six o'clock, in
the Presbyterian Church Of West
Grove
The Cecil Whig. [volume] (Elkton, Md.) 1841-current, 1916-01-01
High Production In College Herd

Seventeen COWS in the Delaware
College herd have completed records
over a period Of one year, with an
average production of 9,S54.5 pounds
of milk and Hip lbs. of fat, the
equivalent of $50 lbs. of butter. OF
the seventeen cows, seven were over
five years of age, two between four
and five. four between three and four
and four between two and three years.
Three two year old daughters of the
herd bull averaged S,434.1 lbs. of
milk. and 491.76 lbs. of butter fat or
about 575 lbs. of butter apiece. The
imported Guernsey COW Yenadizze's
Flora produced in the year 1861
lbs. of milk and 6SS.23 lbs. of butter
fat. equivalent to over 800 lbs. of but
ter. This is the highest Guernsey
record made at the College Farm, and
the highest of all the breeds with the
execution of the record completed by
the Holstein cow Maud H. 2d's Lass,
in February. 1914. She produced 90
1868 lbs. of milk and 727.S0 lbs. of
butter fat, the equivalent of over $50
The Cecil Whig. [volume] (Elkton, Md.) 1841-current, 1916-01-01
Love Finds A Way
Ry NIXON WATERMAN.

Phyllis Wellington was getting well
along in years.
Though rather comely maiden, Phyl-
lis had her fears
That if something didn't happen she
must live her life
AS lorn and lonely spinster. 1earned
to be wife.
Once upon time Ned Wilder took her
in his yacht
To an island in the harbor; twas
lonely spot.
Left her sitting by the water while he
went to find
In a wooded nook some flowers of a
lovely kind.
Phyllis as she sat a-thinking felt a
bit afraid;
Twas an island few would visit and
where no one stayed.
AS she saw the yacht advancing, Phyl-
lis, in dismay.
Mused: ooh, wouldn't it be dreadful
should it break away"
By and by Ted heard her screaming:
ran with all his might;
Saw the yacht a-drifting seward;
Phyllis blanched with fright.
Must have been the rope that parted,
n. bad 4" uIinn re f. FROM m" wboro bo +;od Il
', ro,,t 'dlip p iorn =, ID, s4ono
'''' '"SSe' '''''e
"You must realize" said Phyllis. chat
so much depends.
Were we-well-it doesn't matter;
since we're only friends,
You must go for aid, and promptly;
In this lonely enot . r3oment, Go NJ
nnce I nravr,
Ted looked out across the water-thre2
wide miles of wet;
Gazed at Phyllis still a-weeping in her
wild regret.
Meier before had thoughts of mar
The Cecil Whig. [volume] (Elkton, Md.) 1841-current, 1916-01-01

Each EyeGlass TO give Satisfaction
must be carefully adjusted to ne
the face of IT, -s.s
The Cecil Whig. [volume] (Elkton, Md.) 1841-current, 1916-01-01
ChIldrer Cry
FOR FLETCHER'S
. a s TO RIA

Roy Warren. who in 1912, was sen
fenced to the Maryland penitentiary
by the Hartford county court for III
years. has been pardoned by Governor
Goldsborough. Warren was but IS
years old when sentenced.
*Can't look we'll, eat well or feei
well with impure blood. Keep the
blood pure with Burdock Blood Bit
ters. Eat simply, take exercise, keep
clean, and good health is pretty sure
to follow. SlO0 a bottle. adv
Government agents recently paid a
visit to stores in Chestertown and
fined a number of the dealers for sell
ing supposed soft drinks without Fed
era license.
Fire of a mysterious origin destroy
ed bungalow and its contents be
longing to William f. Miller, at For
est Hill, Monday night of last week.
The property was insured in the Royal
Insurance COmDanV.
The Cecil Whig. [volume] (Elkton, Md.) 1841-current, 1916-01-01
News In Brief

Patrolman William j. Davidson. of
Wilmington, who was shot and seri-
ously wounded while making an arrest
last Fourth of July, has returned 10
duty
Cooch's Bridge Chapter, Daughters
of the American Revolution, has pre-
sented the White Clay Creek and
Welsh Tract schools with copies of its
code.
Everett Guest. of Marshallton. Del,
a guard at the workhouse, recently
sustained fractured leg when struck
by trolley car III Wilmington.
Miss Mary c. Hopkins will become
acting secretary of the Wilmington
Associated Charities, succeeding Miss
Sibyl Gordon. resigned.
Edward Martin, of Hagerstown. ac-
cidentally shot himself in one leg
while loading a revolver one day last
week.
The Wilmington Rotary Club pro-
vided a Christmas dinner for 80 moor
children.
Henry Matthias has resigned as a
rural mail carrier from Westminster.
More than 1900 pounds of candy
and nuts were purchased by the Will
mington police and distributed among
the poor children of the city Christ
mas.
The body of 16 year old girl wash
ed ashore on December %. at Middle
Hooper's Island, was identified as that
of Virginia Howard, daughter of Can
tain Howard, of the steamer Tivoii.
which was burned some weeks ago in
the Chesapeake Bay
Charles O. Carter, editor of the
Maryland Tribune, Salisbury, has re-
tired and d. c. Hageman will succeed
him.
The county commissioners of Car
roll county have appointed William
Barnes superintendent of the county
house.
The Rev. George Boyer, who has
been pastor of the Lutheran church,
Union Bridge. for several years, has
rendered his resignation, to take eff
feet in February. He will 90 to Flor
ence. Ky.
*For any pain. burn, scald or bruise
apply DR.. Thomas Eclectic Oil-the
household remedy. Two sizes, 20c
and SOC at all drug stores. adv
Houten Parsons, a farmer of near
Parsonsburg while working at a
saw mill, one day recently, lost his
balance while reaching for hammer
and fell into the fywheel, and was in
stantly killed.
*Don't use harsh physics. The re-
action weakens the bowels. leads to
chronic constipation. Get Doan's
Regulets. They operate easily. 25c
at all stores. adv
The Somerset county commission
ers have appointed Robert F. Duer,
attorney. and l.. A. Brodies, road en-
gneer, at a salary of 81 900 per year
Edward Hitler, a Baltimore & Ohio
railroad lineman, was beaten and
robbed while walking along the public
rODI .IOnn1 ono MONT rpppntlV
The Cecil Whig. [volume] (Elkton, Md.) 1841-current, 1916-01-01
THE
Second National
Bank Of Elkfon
NO. 4162.

We receive accounts of Corpora
tons, Firms or Individuals, and win
be pleased to meet or correspond with
those who contemplate making changes
or opening new accounts.
Interest paid on Certificates of De-
post remaining months.
Safe Deposit Drawers in Fire-proof
Vault for rent at So, SO and SIS per
year, as to size.
Depositors living at distance from
the Bank can send remittances by mail
safely, which will be promptly ack-
nowledged by return mail.
Discount Day, Monday of each week.
Inquiries will be promptly answered,
and any information relative to bust
ness cheerfully given.
VIM. T. WARBURTON, President
JAMES ]. ARCHER, President
l. ID. DAVIS, Cashier.