Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1916-09-06
Making Himself Ridiculous.

he would have been soaked.
Making Himself Ridiculous.
He-"My dear, l think I'll exercise
my option on that lot across the street"
She-"William, I'm not going to let
you make yourself ridiculous at your
time Of life, by outdoor athletics"
! A COMMISSION of ministers of the
| Episcopal church has recommended
that the word obey be omitted from
| the marriage ceremony. It's superflu-
| Gus, anyway, and if it is dropped it
will not have any effect on the matri-
monial market. Weddings will con-
tinue as of old. Usually when folks
are in love and ready for the minis
ter to tie the knot they are prepared
| to enter into any sort of compact.
Even husband-elect would agree to
| kiss his mother-in-law 365 days in the
year before breakfast if he thought he
would be satisfying the one whom he
is to make his bride. We overheard a
young man remark yesterday that he
had just enjoyed the novel experience
/ of assisting his bride make their first
! breakfast on their return from their
| honeymoon. Next winter this same
! chap will lie in bed mornings and
/ shout down stairs at his wife and ask
her if the coffee is warm yet. Not
| that he will be acting any differently
/ than any other man; not a-tall. He
| merely will arrive at the conclusion
after having plenty time TO think the
matter over, that since he is the pro-
| ducing end of the family-paying for
| the coal and the coffee and everything
that the least friend wife can do is
| to hustle about in the morning and
| give him a chance to sneak another
half hour before he goes forth in the
cold world to battle for her Reason
able? All married men will agree that
| it is. In doing this wife is not taking
any command from her husband. She
is not obeying him. Far from it, She
| is tickled to death to do this little
thing just to keep peace-fn the home.
| When the snow is two feet deep on
| the sidewalk who does the shoveling?
| The wife does not order her husband
to get out the snow shovel She mere
! ly suggests that the neighbors' walks
have been cleaned for hours That's
all. He knows 1t is his move So
the churches, all of them, might lust
as well drop the word obey from the
marriage ceremony. 1t causes more
| trouble than anything else When If
is omitted the brutal husband can't re-
mind his wife that she promised to
do such and so. 'Twere better SO.
|
mo men patients admitted, adyer.
! tises maternity home in DuneIIep.
n. j. Proving that the world is daily
growing more incOnsiderase of the
/ sterner sex.
SENATOR Hull is assailing the Pull
man company for it's treatment of IFS
employees. Colonel Lowden is a direc-
/ TO- 0F ha
| Lowden are candidates for the repub-
lican nomination for governor. Is II
possible that the senator has had his
annual recalled?
| 1T is understood that President Al
Tearney Of the Three-Eye Ieague. when
he was informed the Rock Island Base
ball association had finished the wear
several thousand dollars in the hole.
responded with the comforting aSsur-
ance that the national pastipe + never
profitable the first year i'm town, but
that the second is always hummer
I financially. In other words, It's easy
/ TO be an Optimist when il DOESN'T cast
yen anything. 1t would be a gracious
act on the part of Brother Tearney
were he 10 come through with a check
to partially relieve the burden he was
largely responsible for placing on the
shoulders OF the local team promoters.
Who knows but what he viii do that
very thingl He's a good fellow, you
know.
OR, making It palmer. Charley White
was not defeated by Freddie Welsh.
but was welshed by the referee.
ANNOUNCEMENT is made of the ap-
pointment OF P. F. Ftnnegan as general
western freight agent OF the Baltimore
and Ohio railroad at Chicago. Can this
be the r. r. foreman who wrote the IA
nous wreck message: "Off aein'. on
I agln', gone agin' F1nnegan"? If II fs
he deserves his promotion, for the re-
port Will go down in history as the
most succinct description OF an acct
dent ever penned. In which event II Is
up to Strickland w. Gillian 10 wire
congratulations, Strlck ought TO have
his trunks carried free In future over
the n. q q.
J. NJ. c.