The Brattleboro daily reformer. (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1913-1955, 1916-01-03
HIS GOOD ADVICE
ANONYMOUS.

about Brodwaiser. He was as amiable
and well-meaning little man as ever
wore felt insoles and a chamois Ieath-
er chest protector. But people in
general hardly appreciated his good
qualities. The first time that Smith
saw him he was standing at the edge
of roadside excavation for gas pipes
watching the deliberate movements OF
a laborer who was ostensibly engaged
in throwing out gravel. AS Smith ap-
preached he heard Brodwaiser say:
MY man, if you would grasp your
shovel with your left hand a little
nearer the blade of your implement
you would find it better fulcruna for
the leverage of your right and be en-
abled to raise more earth with sub
stantially the same exertion.
The man stopped and looked up.
"Pfwat's that?" he asked.
Brodwaiser repeated his advice and
the man surveyed him for moment
or two with whitening contempt
And to blazes wild We an yer full
crum!" he said at last. "Gwan away
home wild We an yer beverages, ye lit
tie dough-faced, lantern-jawed idjut.
Talk to me about implements an III
shut ye in me dinner pail an kape we
there till We Earn manners, so / will
Gwan!"
Brodwaiser Redeemed and moved
away in silent dignity. Smith felt
sorry for him and expressed his sym
pathy. Oh Brodwaiser said, Il hard
ly expected anything but abuse One
gets little thanks for good advice, |
notice"
had got very far a sudden gust re-
moved Smiths straw hat. He recov-
cred it with some difficulty and was
rather out of breath when he rejoined
Brodwaiser The latter had waited
and as Smith came up he said: IF
I were you l would buy one of these
hat guards. They can be obtained
for mere trif1e at any hat store, and
the expenditure is repaid a thousand
times by their saving of temper, to
say nothing of the possibility of the
hat being blown beneath the wheels
of dray."
I've seen them Smith said. "You
don't wear one yourself, I notice"
It's unnecessary" he replied, my
hat never"
The wind took it as he spoke and
sent it careering down the street, final
~ landing it in a puddle from whence
he rescued it dripping with mud and
water. Smith could not help saying
that in high wind it was a good idea
to hold loosely fitting hat by the
brim with a tenacious clutch, but
Brodwaiser seemed unconscious of the
delicate sarcasm of the remark sc
much so that when they arrived al
Smiths front gate he called Smiths
attention to the fact that it creaked or
its hinges and recommended the an
plication of sweet oil as a remedy foI
the unpleasant sound.
He was near neighbor of Smiths
and soon after that first meeting he
called on Smith informally, as Smith
was wedding his flower beds On that
occasion Smith became indebted to
his visitor for two pieces of valuable
information-that tobacco burned be.
meath rosebush covered with a cloth
or something of that sort to keep in
the smoke had discouraging effect
upon the plant parasites known as
green fly, and that a porch of sufTi-
Gent width on the west front of his
cottage would afford a grateful shade
against the rays of the sun in the
afternoons.
He was a veritable encyclopedia OF
knowledge-never at a loss for a lit.
tie suggestion on any subject. Until
Smith learned that Brodwaiser was a
bookkeeper for firm of glass import
ers he imagined he must conduct the
Helpful Hints" department of some
newspaper.
Smith overheard him in the meat
market one morning instructing the
butcher in the art of meat cutting.
That amt nothin', though" said the
good-natured butcher with fat smile
when Brodwaiser had left. Hes give
me pointers on preservin' eggs in their
original new badness by dippin' 'em
IN lime an water. III bet he taught
his grandmother to suck EN-.
trimmed sirloin for him the other
day an when I threw the suet in the
box under the counter he says: a
sh'd think you'd use the fragments
OF meat in some sort O. way Std o
wastin' EN-. II you'd put the best o
EN- in your sausage machine witt
proper seasonin' there amt no reason
why it wouldn't be good as long as til;
meats fresh Ho! hot"
But Brodwaiser is no more. He was
a good citizen, good neighbor and 3
kind of fussy husband and father. He
died last spring of pneumonia. A lit
tie before he passed away the doctor
happened to cough to hide MS emo
ton at the sight of Mrs. Brodwaiser's
grief.
Doctor said Brodwaiser, family
Won want IN faEn parq Of no.ob