davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Evening capital news. (Boise, Idaho) 1901-1927, 1916-12-14
TO BE TAKEN BE-
FORE OR AFTER
WHAT!

WHAT!
a Miss Blackbourne of Chicago has
been declared the worlds most beau
tiful woman, but then lots of girls
would look tin Chicago.
HOW TO ENJOY THE GRIP.
Buy copy OF an undcrtakers' trade
Journal and read the ads of caskets,
burial shoes and shrouds.
Deleriums are very often diver
sion. II you can't increase your fever
10 point that will produce one, try
Evening capital news. (Boise, Idaho) 1901-1927, 1916-12-14
Nursing a Fever Patient-II

VERY handy dsinfectant germicide for house US
acid standard" five cent. q in 2o) carbolic
is made by dissoving six (three of
OF pure carboic acid in one gallon of water.
Evening capital news. (Boise, Idaho) 1901-1927, 1916-12-14
HEALTH IS WEAJH
hyJohn B. Huber AM,M.D

By dsedse?-PLATUs
Evening capital news. (Boise, Idaho) 1901-1927, 1916-12-14

Ii IS now proposed to stamp and date all eggs SO as
MINIMIZE the possibility of ancient hen fruit the public
That may solve the problem 1t will also add cost of eggs
Evening capital news. (Boise, Idaho) 1901-1927, 1916-12-14

ISCUSSlON of the election undoubtedly OCCUPY
II considerable of the OF the legislature some
anendatory II not some entirely
- suit The desire for changes the primary law is
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1916-05-26
Everiastina Bricks.

Once made Il brick is practically indie
structible. Nearly every brick that has
ever been made by man from the be
ginning Of time is still in existence on
this earth The men who made and
laid them and who directed these oper
atoms have long since been gathered
into dust. Some of them have doubt
less contributed in their bodies to the
making of more bricks. But the stead
fast and enduring square of baked clay
persists and will until the heavens and
earth are Shriyeled like a scroll.-EX.
change.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1916-05-26
Luke Mcluke SAYS:


Father is always hollering at the
children because they hate to go to
bed and hate to get up, but mother
knows that the poor children inherited
it from their father.
The man who has discovered that
he can't stand prosperity is worse off
than the men who have never had a
chance to find out whether they can
or not.
The old fashioned woman who used
to say that she was inclined to en-
bonpoint now has a daughter who is
just an ordinary corn fed.
What has become Of the old fashion
ed boy who used to burn the other
boys when they watched him make
smoke come out of his eyes?
A mans idea of economy is to leave
the dime on the bar while he absorbs
the first drink and then shove the
dime over to the barkeep and get two
for q quarter.
There may be a few things that
young college graduate believes that
he doesn't know, but we can't think
of one Of them right now.
Many young man has money
enough to idle around and boast Of
his eye for the artistic because his old
daddy was always able to see the
niger in the wood pile.
What has become of the old fashion
ed man who smoked cubeb cigarettes?
It isn't always a mans principles
that make him behave. It Is usually
the police.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1916-05-26
A Trick With an Eco.

Place two V shaped wineglasses OF
the same size near the edge Of table
In the right hand one put an egg, just
fitting the rim Of the glass. Hold the
bases Of the glasses firmly down, the
top rims touching each other. Now
with a quick, sharp breath blow upon
the line where the egg and the glass
meet. The egg will jump to the other
glass. With a little practice this can
be done every time BE careful to blow
In a line with the left hand glass, or
the egg viii jump i'm the wrong direc-
ton and land on the table
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1916-05-26
inconsistent.

A man who took his infant daughter
10 be baptized told the clergyman to
call her Venus.
But | refuse TO call her Venus, :"
said the clergyman Indignantly. I've
nus is the name of pagan goddess"
We'll how about your own girl,
Diana?" said the man.-London An
swers.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1916-05-26
Two More.

A. Worm is theatrical manager in
New York city. Take him fishing with
you, Luke, and never mind the other
bait.
Speaking geographically, GAINESVILLE
herself can contribute one also to Mr..
McLuke. Erie Lake is a student at
GAINESVILLE high school.-Zanesville CO.,
Signal
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1916-05-26
Never Believe Anything a Newspaper
Man Tells You, .

Oh, Luke McLuke we know you now!
Listen, and I'll tell you how:
a newspaper man the other day
Described YOU in this very way:
Your name begins with IT, your hair is
black
You are six feet tall, and that's a fact.
You are married, l hate to tell,
Though perhaps, that's why you know us
so well.
Mrs. s.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1916-05-26
Bits Of Byplay
By Luke McLuke
Copyright. 1915, the Cincinnati
Enquirer
Hooray!
By Luke McLuke

"Are you the president of the Soci-
ETY. For the Suppression Of Useless
Noises?" asked the caller.
81 am" replied the president. What
can do for yOu?"
IL want to interest your society in a
great reform that will do away with a
lot of suffering and that is right In line
with the object for which your society
was founded" stated the caller.
what is it?" asked the president.
cit is plan to do away with the last
three speakers at every banquet" re-
piled the caller.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1916-05-26
Truth Is Stranger Than Fiction.

Situation Wanted.-Am forty years
DID, hale, hearty and anxious to OBJ
tain home on good farm, with home
environments; have college education;
ing; make wage secondary-in fact,
will pay So per month while learning
Address 441G, Record oflice.-Ad. in
Philadelphia Record.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1916-05-26
Scrape.

"They tell me that Jones was mixed
up in bad scrape yesterday" remark
ed Smith.
"How did It happen?" asked Brown.
Gle got shaved in a five cent barber
shop" replied Smith.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1916-05-26
The Wise Fool.

"Never put off until tomorrow the
things you could do today" advised
the sage.
81 never do" replied the fool 81 al
ways put them off until next week"
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1916-05-26
How to Become a Great Man.

Keep quiet my son, and bear In mind
That on your mouth you should wear
clamps,
And some day, maybe, we will find
Your picture on our postage stamps.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1916-05-26
Easy.

II you'd fill your life with JOY,
Love your enemies, my boy.
If you haven't any you
Can go out and make a few.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1916-05-26
The Optimist.

He surely is a cheerful mutt,
For he sings night and day,
81 don't know where I'm going, but
! know I'm on my way"
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1916-05-26
Wisdom.

The wise man moves next door to a
family whose income is less than his
Chicago Herald
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1916-05-26
Well He's Due.

Dear Lucknow is the time TO adj
NIT Mr.. Consider Frost Of Frost. o.
+. r. T..
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1916-05-26
Our Daily Special.

A hearse is about the only thing
that is sure to come to him who waits.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1916-05-26

Ones
Luke McLuke says fishing is a fail
ure as sport. A remarkable state
ment that to come from a man of unu-
sual imaginative facilities. - Houston
Post.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1916-05-26

Things to Worry About.
There are All ocean cables in the
world
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1916-05-26

Names Is Names.
Miss Oma Corn lives at Peering, o.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1916-05-26
Deluxe
Music
Shop

OF the Metropolitan Opera Com.
pany, the worlds greatest Wagner
ian tenor, proving by actual com.
parison the infallibiity of Edison's
new art. He is one of the many
great artists who have made the
same test with same results.
Hear Edison's Ee Creation Of the
voice Of the great Urlus; then hear
Urlus himself whenever you have
the opportunity-.at the Metropoli-
tan in New York, or when he is on
tour.
Albuquerque morning journal., 1916-09-11
NOTICE TO BIDDERS FOR SEALED
BIDS ON PAVING CONTRACTS.

Notice is hereby given that pm
suant to resolution passed and APP
proved by tho city Council of the city
of Albuquerque ON September 3. 1916
the city Clork viii receive sealed bids
for the furnishing of the material auC
Itho Improvement Of West Contra
avenue i'm the city Of AlbuqucrGuc
from the east line of Sixth street tC
the west line of Fourteenth street uI
to - o'clock noon on Monday the
18TH day of September, 1916, which
bids viii be opened and considered on
the evening of said date
An bids must be accompanied by
Ia check certified by some bank of
the city Of Albuquerque payable to
said city. equal to per cent of the
amount of such bid ordinance 1lS of
the City of Albuquerque is to be con
sidercd part Of this advertisement
for the purpose of receiving bids for
the Improvement work The plans
for the work may be seen by pros
pective bidders at the office of the
city engineer Bidders may bid upon
any or all kinds of standard type paw
ing, the bidder to furnish specifica-
tions as part of his sealed bid. The
city Council reserves the right to re-
ieCt any or all bids
THOMAS HUGHES, city Clerk.
Albuquerque morning journal., 1916-09-11

.rf DO Th, Central
baseball season closed talaA
Nnurf OF The fist NHi
and Springfield "a, Ue'
rafIHsfieId took the p"unani
Hs af Iaf uy winning a double.
sllf today According 90 word i'.
.ssf f5sm President = W. ueh'r
5000 affaHEsmsHts have been compile.
ts fef fs,sl season series which vii
rtsff nsat "wednesday.
Albuquerque morning journal., 1916-09-11
PIRATES RALLY IN
NINTH; WIN FROM
THE CUBE, 8 To I
Pittsburgh Sages Eleventh
hour Batting Conest and
Drives in Six Runs Red
Legs Beat the Cardinals,
10, -o.~.-s ,ov.s., .sse,., ,....s ~,..

chicago. sept 10 Pittshurgh
scored -iN runs ln the ninth inning TO-
aa, driving Packard from me slab
aud pounding rrrndoraast Elm't
smith an omaha recruit starred IL
bat fur the cubs Hurlciah GrWcs
e pitcher from IIrmiueham made
favorable impression with pittsburgh
Score
Albuquerque morning journal., 1916-09-11

rOh RENT-Room. 1880. fActn.
Aney In business section, suitable FOR
plumbing or tin shop, or STORAGE.
s. nsst and wAtcA Included. Apply this
Albuquerque morning journal., 1916-09-11

Want a high grade employee or the bet
ter grade Of servantse Make use Of the uant
columns OF the Journal,
Connecticut western news., 1916-05-18
What the Other Fellows Say

The United Confederate Veterans. upon suggestion of the Grand Army of the Republic, are to be invited to hold their next encampment in Washington, D. c. A splendid idea and let Us hope it will be accepted. Haven Union.
 A ell-meaning doctor in referring to the fear of osculatory germs tells courting couples to go on kissing. Bless his heart, they have never stopped. Register.
 There are ten people who walk for everyone who rides, and yet you never hear of dinner given for the promo tion of Good Sidewalks, with speeches, toasts and champagne. .-Meriden Jour- nal.
 The amateur gardener can now come to the front and take the place in the limelight made vacaDt by the man with the snowshovel and the ash sitter. -Ansonia Sentinel.
 Hyhpenated citizenship may reach the point when we may hear of the Irish Germans or the German Irish. But not soon.-Shore Line Times. Premier Asquith says that the British Empire has furnished more than B. 900, ,000 soldiers since the war began. At least 85 per cent. of them have been raised in Great Britain. If the United States did the same i'll proportion to population, we should have au army of 10000, ,000 men.-South Norwalk Sentinel.
 There is no justice in the world. The movies are censored but the vaude- vile jokesmiths are still permitted to pass out the most ancient and other wise objectionable products. Water bury Republican.
 The Germans have been using sub- stitutes for so many exhausted pro- ducts that pretty soon they'll be sub- stituting substitutes for the substitutes. -Hartford Post.
 It is somewhat surprising to learn that the Methodist church is seriously considering the advisAbility of drop ping the word "devil'' from It's ritual. i-Hartford Courant.
 A venerable Lee woman said changes had been rapid all along the line in the past ten years but she had yet to see a tin peddler using an automobile to make calls on his customers Pitts. field Eagle.
Connecticut western news., 1916-05-18
Five Million Motor Cars.

Figures given by the Automobile Chamber of Commerce are amazing, even in this magical industry where growth and progress have ceased to sur. prise us, says an exchange. It is estimated that this years production will reach the tremendous total of l.. 250, 900 cars, nearly $50, 900 more than last years record output. That means one sale to every eighty people in the United States,
 By the end of the present year, it is figured that there will be $500, 900 motor vehicles in the hands of AmeTi. can owners, making one to every six or seven families.
 That might be regarded as coming dangerously near the limit of the nations purchasing power. The de. mand, one would suppose, must soon stop sky.rocketing, leaving only a steady cal for the replacing of old cars. | But the experts say there is market in the country for 5000, 900 motor vehicles. And since all prophecies :. in this business have been distsnced over and over again, they might just about as we'll say that there will be 10, 000,- 900 cars owned in the United States within few years If the reported discovery of an automobile fuel made from water and costing one cent gal lou proves to be true, it would be rash msn who would set any limit to the automobile market.
Connecticut western news., 1916-05-18
BOOSTING THE PRICE.

The increase in the cost of coal, to the consumer, is going to be consider ably greater than the increase in wages recently granted to the miners. accord ing to a suspicion inWashingtOn. And twas ever thus, not only in the matter of coal, but in other commodities. The increase in the first cost, of an article, it matters not how slight, is added to by every handler and middleman until it reaches the consumer, who is charged an advance out of all proportion to the original increase.
 The Federal Trade Commission has been advised by the Attorney General of the United States to keep an eye on the coal situation and prevent, if possible, such cumulative increases, which would impose actual hardship on the poorer classes, as well as rank injustice upon the well to do.
 The Waterbury American, dealing editorially with this subject, places the responsibility, Gin the final analysis, y upon the government, thus:
 "But behind it all is the fact that the federal government itself has created the situation which is favor able for just such a progressive raise ill cost during the progress of the coal through various hands from the niue to the consumer. For example, the federal government has so hit the rail- roads that they lack the facilities to handle any increase of business, and they can't borrow the money to buy the facilities with which to handle it.. Hence under the resulting congestion they are excused from anything like normal deliveries. As a result, people are glad to get coal at any price. This Investigating and stopping dispropor' tionate increase in the case of coal comes pretty near to being case of shutting the barn door after the horse is stOlen.'
Connecticut western news., 1916-05-18
Decoration Day.

Flags and the band and marching Of faithful veteran feet, Fathers, young men and children With voices shrill and sweet; And Dincoln's spirit marching in every
 shining liue, And Llncoln's peace and freedom lit
 with the smile divine! Flags and the band and marching- Banners that proudly wave, May green upon the meadows
 And on the soldiers grave; The boys in blue are ashes 'neath the
 lilacs on their sod, But their souls are free forever with
 Lincoln and with God! Flags and the band are marching And the drum. beats steady tErOb, Pipe on above, o robin,
 To drown a sudden sob The laurel wreath for heroes dead. And
 a cheer fo1 all the brave Who march with Lincoln's soul today
 to liberate and save! Martha Gilbert Dickinson Bianchi,
Connecticut western news., 1916-05-18
THE DEER LAW.

The National Humane Review has scant respect for our Connecticut deer law, After summarizing the provi- sions of the enactment it concludes:
 By the middle of March 1,311 deer had been killed under this provision of law, according to the reports, and it was thought that not more than one- third of the number actually shot had been reported. Game wardens in all parts of the state reported the discovery of lame deer, wounded deer and deer limping and starving because of in. jured legs. Que case was cited where wounded deer was attacked by dogs and disemboweled. Such grave abuses have arisen from this law that it would seem that Connecticut must have it re. pealed or stand convicted of aiding and abetting brutality"
Connecticut western news., 1916-05-18
Newspaper is Sued for s2o.ooo.

Mrs. Hazel D. McGreal, of Green. wich, filed suit Saturday through her attorney, George P. Rowell, of Stan. ford, for $20, 900 damages against the Greenwich Publishing Company, pub fishers of the newspaper called the Greenwich News and Graphic. The plaintiff alleges that the paper on April IS contained an mticle in which Mrs. McGreal was charged with blackmail. ing and with "hoodwinking" men of National repute who live in Green. wich. Such charges the plaintiff as. serts, are false, malicious and libellous and she further claims that the news paper refused to print retTaction of the same at her request.
Connecticut western news., 1916-05-18
In Th,s Land of Ours.

Nine thousand young trees and 10, - 900 pounds of seed were planted on the national forest reserves in 1914.
 The government built more than 2,00O miles of trail and 5000 miles of telephone lines on the national forest reserve in 1914.
 The cottonseed oil production of the United States is now more than 200,. 900, 900 gallons year, or five times as much as i'll 1890.
 One passenger was killed for each 1, 900, 900 passengers carrted by the railroads of the United States during the last year.
Connecticut western news., 1916-05-18
THE REVEILLE
BY BRET HARTE

 Hark hear the tramp of thousands. And of armed the hum; Lo! nations hosts have gathered Round the quick alarming drum Saying, Come.
 Freemen, come! Ere your heritage be wasted said the quick alarming drum "Le me of my heart take counsel: War is not of life the sum; Who shall stay and reap the harvest When the autumn days shall comeY" But the drum
 Echoed Come! Death shall the bave harvest said the soemn-soundng drum.
 But when the coming battle, What of profit springs therefrom? What It conquest subjugation, Even greater ills become?'
 But the drum
 Answered. Come! You must do the to prove it, said the Yankeeanswerng drum.
 What if, mid the cannons thunder Whstling shot and bursting bomb When my brothers fall around me- Should my heart grow cold aud numbP" But the drum
 Answered. Come! Better there in death united than in life recreant-Come! Thus they answered-hopng fearing, Some in faith, and doubting some, Till trumpet voice proclaiming,. Said My chosen people, come!' Then the drum
 Lo was dumb For the great heart of the naton thobbng answered. come'
Connecticut western news., 1916-05-18
The Wurra Wurra Club

All the members came early to avoid the rush, which proved a wise provi- sion, for by the time the rush began everybody had arrived from henceforth forward. Then, and not until then, the meeting was called to order by the president, MT. E. V. Nestell, who made the special request that all members remain until the services were over, or go ont quietly between the ax. From that moment they showed a disposition to do so if worse came to wurst. There upon the roll was immediately called, and all who answered to their names were present. The minutes were read by the secretary, Mir. Hardenbergh, and the Opening Ode was sung by Frank Stevens, accompanied by Sam Camp on his influenza. The meeting was then called to orderlagain.
 Bert Brewer got up and made a motion that the fire alarm siren be sold to those Athenians from York State who came over Friday to hear it howl. "They seemed to be pleased with it, {" said he, land we ought 10 let them have ir; then we might negotiate for an alarm that wouldn't wake people up in the night with feeling that all the lost souls in Purgatory were after them"
 Mayor Roraback jumped up to ask how the gentleman would like to be awakened in case of fire. "Does he expect somebody to stand under his window, in tue middle of the night, and play Home, Sweet Home on a harmonica ?"
 No" replied Brewer, but would be satisfied if 42-centimeter cannon were fired off six or eight times on my front porch. I'm light sleeper any way, and waken very easily"
 The chair declared the whole matter out of order, and the disputants sub. i sided
 Ed. Warner said he would like to hear from Brother Sam. Hitchcock something about the big suffrage meet ] ing held at his house Thursday. [ Sam. rose and said he would be de. lighted to report on that affair, but he thought his brother Con. was better qualified to give the report, as he had better command of English and was a closer observer.
 l Con. got up and stated that while it would give him great pleasure to de- scribe the meeting, he felt that the duty really belonged to his father, Frank Hitchcock, who was not only older than either or his sons, but better l qualified to do the subject justice.
 Frank was induced to rise aud re port. He said either of the boys was just as capable of reporting that suf- trage meeting us he was. As matter of fact, he said, all three of them made l it convenient to have some work to do eight miles away from the house, that day, and didn't get home until after the meeting had adjourned and the sutfragists had dispersed. However, from the imprints. about the front lawn. he was convinced that the affair must have been a sue. cess; and he felt like congratulating those three or four ministers who were the only lords of creation among all those women. T take off my hat to those heroic clergymen," said he.
 Any further business :" queried the chair. There being none, the meet. Ing adjourned.
Connecticut western news., 1916-05-18

"That's queer slogan you fellows here in Canaan have adopted for your town-'The Green end of the Nut meg,' " said President Colley, of the Waterbury 0. of c But he had to admit that the emerald hue is an in- dication of growth, and that in vegeta- tion generally green is a sign of life. But Waterbury tries to get something on everybody"
Connecticut western news., 1916-05-18

Plans for the observance of Memorial Day are under way. Committees are appointed. and their appeal to the people of the community for cooperation will meet with cordial response-they al ways do. The people of Canaan will ingly show that they realize they can not do too much in the way of mani festing their affectionate regard for the old soldiers who are left.
Connecticut western news., 1916-05-18

The liar ford Post refers to Major J. Mes. Ives, Judge Advocate of the Connecticut National Guard" This must be the successor to Col. J. Moss Ives, the genial soldier-lawyer of Dan- bury.