davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1916-11-19
A--- -----------------=----------
AROUND THE CITIES.

Helena. Mont, reports that bread has
gone up to is cents loaf. The uplift lends
fresh emphasis to the name.
A statistical sharp who dotes on grave
figures reports that more people are killed
by automobiles in Chicago than by Zeppelins
in London.
AS measure of safety the st. Joe judge
presiding at the trial of the county prose-
cutor on the charge of murder required from
attorneys on both sides a pledge against
gun plays. Any person found toting a gun
into court will be hustled to the outer air.
New York City's traffic court pulled down
$22,991 in fines during October. besides re-
voking three drivers licenses and sending
twenty-five speed maniacs to prison. The
court is steadily speeding up to the laws
limit
st. Joe is to give a tryout to an open air
school. into which will be gathered the
anemic children at other schools. The school
superintendent reports l5l children, whose
health would be benefited, are available for
the test.
During October the Interborough Rapid
Transit company of New York carried ST.
$4,000 passengers, a 10,0o0, 900 increase
over October, last year. The figures support
the assertion that Gotham is increasing the
pace.
Decatur. Ill., wins place on the map of
| prayerful righteousness. The local foot ball
team opens each scrimmage with prayers
| for victory. So far the soulful aspirations
| Of the team pulled down an unbroken score
| Of winnings.
Salt Lake City's chief of police announces
publicly that bunco men trimmed the citizens
for s25o,ooo during the year and the police
couldn't do thing because laws are ineffec-
tive and the victims wouldn't give them
| selves away in court. ~. e.
Back in Paterson. N. j.. the boss BARRIERS
hit the striking BARRIERS below the belt by
turning their shops into open shave your
| SELF parlors. Several shops Of this kind are
in successful operation in New York City.
Patrons are provided with tools and access
series and do the job without assistance.
The bosses take in more money and pay
| less.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1916-11-19
DOMESTIC PLEASANTRIES.

Now that women are to go to congress,
things will be In a pretty state"
Yes, debates on the fate of the nation
will have to be kept waiting while con-
gresswoman powders her nose. "-Baltimore
American.
I'm sure that grocer of ours gives us
short weight" said he.
NO, he doesn't" said ma. His scales
are correct l weighed myself on them this
morning and they showed that l am twenty
pounds lighter than l thought I was De-
troit Free Press.
my wife won't read any out-of-town pa
pers,"
why not?"
Every time she picks one up she reads
of PERFECTLY beautiful house for rent.
hundreds Of miles away" - Louisville
Courier Journal
"Bluffem poses as a hustler, doesn't he7"
We'll. yes; he's always energetic In reach
ing a conclusion that something ought to be
done"-Boston Transcript.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1916-11-19
THE MOCKING BIRD.

Frank L. Stanton in Atlanta Constitution
He didn't know much music
When first he came along;
An all the birds were wonderin'
Why he didn't sing q song. -
They primped their feathers In the sun.
An sung their sweetest notes;
An music Jest come on the run
From all their putry throats!
But still that bird was silent
In summer time an fall;
He Jest set still an listened,
An he wouldn't sing at all!
But one night when them songstsrs
Was tired out an still, J.
An the wind sighed down the valley
An went creepn' up the hill;
When the stars was all a-trembls
In THO dreamn fields of blue,
An the daisy in the darkness
Felt the falin' O. the dew
There comes a sound O. melody
No mortal ever heard,
An all the birds seemed singin'
From the throat O. one sweet bird,
Then the other birds went Mayin'
In land too fur to call;
Fer there warn't no use in stayn'
When one bird could sing fer all!
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1916-11-19
oERR ma. kkAB,selE,
M wiz AlWEtS WAKES NE N
NtGHT TO TELL NE SAE HEIRS
BURGLARS IN The HOUSE, Bur +
REFUSE 10 @WaM I nM
R\GHrf
-pAlllP GiRN&>
~6
YES Bur pONr eCAME YOUR WR
IF THERE IS MONEY MISSING From
Your TROUSERS N The MoRNulG:

Stranger-Seventeen years ago I landed
here in your town broke I struck you for a
dollar. You gave 1t to me, saying you never
turned a request like that down.
Citizen teagerly)-Yes?
Stranger-Well, are you still game p
Judge.
Yes, | am going on the stage"
We'll. l hope you succeed in making a
name for Yourself"
That has already been attended to.
picked a beautiful one out of romantic
novel. Post.
II hear that you got into trouble by using
an anonymous communication in your pa
per-" remarked the country town lawyer.
81 did" replied the country-town editor
But I'm carrying a notice In the next issue
that hereafter anonymous communications
Will not be published unless the writer's
name is sisned."-Cincinnati Enquirer.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1916-11-19
TODAY
Thought Nugget for the Day.

Thought NUGGET 1Or tht Day
A commonplace life, we say, and we
sigh;
But should we sigh as we say?
The commonplace sun in the COM
monplace sky
Makes up the commonplace day
The moon and the stars are common
place things,
The flower that blooms and the BIRD
that sings:
But sad were the world and dark our
lot,
If the flowers failed and the sun
shone not,
And God, who sees each separate soul,
Out of commonplace lives makes his
beautiful whole.
Susan Coolidge.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1916-11-19

Stop, look. listen" the revered safety motto,
is fttingly emphasized by the state supreme court
in a-case involving personal injury damages grow
ing out Of speeding over railroad crossings The
point which penetrates the windshields is that
careless drivers may not capitalize their reckless
ness in bucking locomotive.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1916-11-19

Peaceful blockade" of Greece pro-
claimed by Allies.
Earl Kitchener conferred with Gen
eral Serial at Salonica.
German aeroplanes bombarded Brit
ish encampment in Belgium.
Italians broke into Austrian lines
on Isonzo front, but were elected, ac-
'cording to Vienna.
Four-fifths of Serbia, according to
estimate, occupied by the invading
armies of Austria, Germany and Bull
garia
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1916-11-19

Farm machinery binding Irvine and laundry
bills rub elbows with bread, potatoes coal and
shoe leather on the price escalator. Some day the
boosting machinery will encounter the remorsc-
less hammer Of the victim and the bargain coun-
ter come to its own.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1916-11-19

Owing to the press Of more important mat
ter The election Of president in Cuba escaped
notice. This in itself measures great progress. A
general election in Cuba without enough shoot
ing to be heard across the straits adds new luster
to the gem OF the Antilles
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1916-11-19

The Chicago Tribune editor demonstrates with
The Bee for referring to that paper as a new
recruit IN the short ballot movement" We apollo
gze Recruit or charter member the Tribune
is landing some Of the hardest cuts on the long
ballot
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1916-11-19
In Omaha Thirty Years Ago.

Mrs Euclid Martin, talented anna
teur, is painting showery weather.
Mrs Patrick treated a number OF
her lady acquaintances to sleigh ride,
South Omaha is to have bank Of
its own Stock has been taken by
number of well known capitalists,
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1916-11-19

Suppose the master bakers succeeded in plac-
ing an embargo on exports of grain. Fix that
supposition firmly in mind then imagine what
would happen to the master bakers when the
farmers and elevator men cut loose.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1916-11-19

With the ice broken by woman member OF
congress, what is there to stop President Wilson
from having a woman member OF his cabinet3
Now ladies', don't all speak at oncel
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1916-11-19

The Polish kingdom proposition carries the
fundamental condition that the natives must fight
for it. As things go in Europe these days the
price Of living is fighting for it, and living on
those terms is mighty uncertain
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1916-11-19

The high cost Of building seems to be no check
to Omaha's every-little while acquisition OF an
other costly high building. .-.H
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1916-11-19

Boston Transcript: The political prescience
of Woodrow Wilson. however. exceeds, and
explains his political achievement. THE
master, politician Of the White House" is
the title he has earned and won. From
first to last he has appealed to the soft side
of the. American people, and upon that APP
peal he has carried the day
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1916-11-19

Peace leagues and peace talk attract attention
here and there, but artillery holds the center OF
the stage as the big noise -maker.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1916-11-19

The flock of turkey birds headed for the
White House in no manner shadows the radiant
joy Of pie counter feast
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1916-11-19

Mr. Bryan still insists that the democratic
party's chiefest weakness lies in lack Of publicity
mediums. He evidently does not count either Of
Nebraskas self-styled great democratic dailes."
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1916-11-19

Food prices are going skyward but there are
no signs of the sheriff throwing up his ja-feeding
contract for having become proftless
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1916-11-19

Peddling false rumors about democratic Office
holders resigning should be made punishable by
law as a misdemeanor, if not as felony.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1916-11-19

Cheer upl The rising cost Of living boats in
vain against the volume and vigor Of the foot ball
rooter.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1916-11-19
OCTOBER CIRCULATION
53.818 Daily-Sunday 6O,252

The open door in China is fairly safe SO long
as borrowed money rolls in.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1916-11-19


among whom are the following: Will
liam A. Paxton, John A. Creighton,
P. L. Her, John McShane and Herman
Kountze. The new bank will be known
as the Union Stock Yards bank Of
South Omaha.
The new Philemon club gave its
second party and among those present
were Misses Mary Beckman, Dora
Becliman. Beindorff; Mesdames Tan
ner and Stewart and Messrs. Lydick,
Wakefield, Crane, Connell, Beindorff,
Frye and Tanner.
Frank j. Lange was married to Miss
Jeanette Corner, a highly esteemed
young lady of Council Bluffs. Mr.
LANCE is in the employ, of the Omaha
Savings bank.
The trustees of South Omaha have
fixed the license of the saloons there
at $500 each per year. The saloon
men are also required to give $4,000
bond to comply with the requirements
of the terms of their license.
Secretary Nattinger has received a
letter from a gentleman in Illinois
who wants to purchase two carloads
of Nebraska corn for seed.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1916-11-19

Storyettc Of the Day.
one of the latest stories in regard
to the gentleman ranker" in the Brit
ish army is reported by the London
Taller. An officer who superintendent
the receipt of a large and varied stock
of stores felt the need of a clerk, ano
told the sergeant-major to hunt up
one from among the. men. The SER
geant-mator could not find man
who pleaded guilty" to being a clerk,
but he eventually Singled out a sober
looking private and took him before
the officer.
Are you a clerk" demanded the
captain.
mo, sir" replied the man.
do you know anything about fig
ures?" asked the captain sourly.
81 can do bit" replied the man
modestly.
"A Bit" snarled the officer. us
this the best man you can find9" said
he to the sergeant major.
ayes, sir" said that worthy
Well" growled the captain, 81
suppose I'll have to put UP with him."
Turning to the private he snapped,
What were you In civilian life?"
Professor of mathematics at -
college, sir" was the reply.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1916-11-19

The Day We Celebrate.
Rev. William A. Sunday, better
known as BILLY" Sunday. the evange-
list was born November 10, 1868, at
Ames, la. IT'S only year since he
conducted his revival in Omaha and
celebrated his last birthday here.
Hugh Cutler paying teller at the
United States National bank, is 80
years old today. He was born at
Rapid City, S. D., and has been with
the bank for five years.
Thomas R. Porter, manager Press
News association, is AZ years old to-
day. He furnishes Omaha news stories
to western papers.
Robinson M. Switzler is an Omaha
boy celebrating his thirty-first birth
day. He is associated with his father
in practicing law.
Brigadier General Robert K. Evans,
U. s, A., retired, born at Jackson,
Miss, sixty-four years ago today
Gabriel Hanotaux, the celebrated
French statesman and publicist, born
sixty-three years ago today.
Margaret Mayo, author of num-
Der of successful plays, born in Illinois,
thirty-four years ago today.
George w. Human, president of
Marietta college. born at Mount Nor
ris. N, Y, fifty-three years ago today
Jose r, Capablanca, world famous
chess expert, born in Havana, Cuba,
thirty-three years ago today.
Everett Scott, shortstop of the Bos-
ton American league base ball team,
born at Bluffton, Ind, twenty four
years ago today.
Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1916-11-19
This Day i'm History.

hAo Duy "A
1794-Conclusion of Jays treaty fix
ing the eastern boundary of the
United States and calling for the sur
render of Detroit and other western
posts, held by the British.
1S31-James A. Garfield. twentieth
president of the United States, born
in Cuyahoga county, o. Died at Ell
boron, N j., September 10, 1881.
1S61-Town of Warsaw, Mo-, de-
stroyed by the confederates.
r. 1S64-The blockade of Norfolk and
Pensacola was raised by proclamation
of President Lincoln. La. 81.
International Weman's Christian
Temperance union organized at Cleve-
land.
1SS9-The first state legislature Of
North Dakota met at Bismarck.
1S91--William j. Florence, cele-
brated actor, died in Philadelphia.
Born in Albany, N. Y, July rs, 1881.
1S93-Trainmen of the Lehigh VAL
ley Railroad went on strike.
1S9S-Don Carlos Buell., noted union
commander in the civil war, died at
Rockport, Ky. Born near Marietta,
o., March %, 1918.
1903-The house of representatives
passed the Cuban reciprocity bill.
1904-Statue of Frederick the Great
presented to the United States by EN-
peror William, unveiled at the Army
War college in Washington.
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1916-03-26

they're using in this war, Birsky," Zapp
said, why should you worry
I'm speaking from American bombs,
Birsky said. German bombs is different
Zapp. When a zeppeliner drops one OF
them bombs on a babies hospital in mis-
take for a dockyard, Zapp, he's confident
that it was made back home in Germany
by a regular bomb maker, and not a teller
which used TO was in the ladies' neckwear
manufacturing and couldn't make 4 sue
cess of it. Because, you can say what you
please about the Germans, Zapp, CON-
mercially speaking they're as honest as
the day"
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1916-03-26
German Bombs HurI Acid and Rusty
Nails, He Tells Zapp, and the
Coney Trenches Aren't Safe.

That's the whole trouble between Mr..
Wilson and Congress, Zapp. Mr.. Wilson
claims like you do, that America should
act according to American law. and Con-
gress says we should act according to
German law which Germany makes since
the war started"
well, what are we, anyway" Zapp
asked, Americans or Germans?'
Really and truly, we are Americans
with handful of Germans Birsky said.
Then it seems to me that the Germans
in Congress is making an awful Geschrci
for only a handful" Zapp commented.
Sure. l know" Birsky replied, but the
German element in Congress is like SAT
from in the soup, Zapp. A little pinch,
understand, will turn a whole gallon
yellow. In fact, Zapp, the way some Con-
gressmen is behaving, you would think
that if America goes to work and gets an
American ship sunk on her by Germany
and there happens to be couple of Ger
man-Americans drowned on it, yunder-
stand. Milwaukee, Hobckcn, ST. Louis,
Cincinnati and the Hamburg and Knick-
erbocker Avenue sections of Brooklyn
would declare war on the United States
Furthermore. if there's some Irishmcn
sunk on the same boat, Senator O'Gor-
man would give up his American citizen
shin and become a naturalizcd Milwau-
k.ean. while il Gott soil haetcn an ltalioner
or so would be killed, understand, Null
berry Bend wouldn't even bother to call
back her ambassador before her corpse
Of aying machines would begin dropping
on the Fifth Avenue retail district bombs
filed with garlic salami, Parmesan
cheese. Table dote red wine and other
strong Italian explosives. tell YOU
Iapp. when it comes 20 this here German
eubmarine proposition, the United States
g America amt no more united than TIC
limited Cigar Stores Of America would lie
e jts statesmen was inviting IT'S CON-
,etitors 10 walk right in and help them
eelyeg 10 the stock. in particular the
choice pcriectos, because them Ameri-
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1916-03-26
Wherein Cleanliness
Is Next to Pop
ularity.

~ ERTHA RUCK, author OF The Boy
X with Wings" is so insistent on the
~ theme of soap and water that II we did
not happen 20 know that she is the wife OF
Oliver Onions, the novelist, we might darkly
suspect his is soap manufacturing probes
sion. and that he lives by the lather instead
OF the letter.
"The Boy with Wings" Is light and airy
az its name. a refreshing bit OF youthful love
interviewer with aeroplanes and war in Eng
land "as is" but for sheer novelty OF advice
10 the heroine, a sweet inocent young thing
as to how not 10 hasten, yet not lose her
youthful lover, bark ye TO these remarks
snatched at random from the lips Of her more
worldly wise chum and counsellor:
Men say they like what they call
healthy looking girl; as often as not It
simply means the girl who happens to be eS-
pecially cleaRi Half the nice girls / know
aren't what I call tubbed Oh, they think
thew are. Yet how many OF them with bath
rooms A yard from their bedrooms bother
to have scrub at night as well as IN the
morningP It's at night they're grimy my dear.
It's at night that they leave 1t on, powder ana
all 20 work in until that 'untrcsh look gets
chronic. Now get all ready TO be shocked, but
7 tell YOU the twobaths a-dsy rule would give
us much less OF the Loney-and-N Neglected
Women Problem! There
"Oh. it's revoltingly unpoetie, know Ana
our suffragette boarder would tell US she IS
TOO nice minded that she is above pam
pering the body, But which is the whole
sorner sight, I'd like to know-a girl who
brushes her hair until il shines, uses cold
cream and soap and water until she CLOVIS
pink and white like a rose, always immaeu-
lately fresh in her clothes, or one who is
above seeing TO it, runs about neglected and
untidy!
Some girls don't seem to think OF making
the most OF themselves until some man
comes along that they want to make the most
Of them. Then too often it's scramble. The
girl who takes care to look her best all the
time, cultivates her garden as she goes along,
won't have to start digging up the weeds ana
sweeping the lawn hve minutes before inc
Garden party. Don't be sometimes lovely
type
"A man once said the scent OF my na' We
like cherrv-wood OF course dioh' w.
6dc in him | regiously shampoo 80
two weeks, give it fifty strokes anu '''
rum and rosemary every night
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1916-03-26

cans which has got business important
enough to make them risk trip TO Eu-
rope in these times is the best stock 0.
the country. Take A. c. Vanderbilt.
Charles Frohman and Linden Bates, and
lot of other Americans who went down
on the Lusitania, and they was perfectoS
and invincibles worth couple of thou
sand such stogies and rough smokers as
we got in Congress to-day, Zapp.'
That's all right, too. Birsky," Zapp
commented. you can call Congress sdf-
from, stogies and any other vegetable
from lemons to onions, Birsky, ober ii
they can keep America out of this war
I am satisfied War to country is like
lawsuits to business man, Birsky. They
eat him up init expenses, understand,
no difference if he wins or loses, he IS
broke anyhow
Did l say he wasn't?' Brsky contin-
ued. But if business man lets it be
known that he would do anything rather
than 60 into lawsuit, understand, his
customers would claim shortages before
they unpack the goods; his travelling
statesmen would sell his samples on him;
his bookkeeper would take taxicab rides
NIT the petty cash; his competitors would
steal his designs his foreman would pad
the payroll, and finally when it is seen
that he wouldn't do nothing about it, the
small fry gets busy. One of the button
hole makers claims an unlawful discharge
and sues him in a Municipal Court that
the boss hired him for a term Of one year
at twelve dollars a week in front OF two
disinterested witnesses with a twenty
five per cent interest in the verdict Wher
the foreman gets fired he brings hive
thousand dollar action for libel on &C
count of being called dirty crook, and
also acts as witness in three ten thousand
dollar suits against the boss by operators
which alleges personal injuries from fail-
ing downstairs, and they got no dithculty
in proving that the stairs was defective or
account they made EN- so with hatchet
the day before the accident. And that's
the way it goes, Zapp. Nobody has got
so many lawsuits as the business mar
who would do anything to avoid law
suit. And if Teller claims to be long
suffering, Zapp, there's plenty people
would oblige him that way
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1916-03-26
By MONTAGUE GLASS,
Illustrations by Briggs.
Copgriqht IeI6-The Tribune Assn.

llVY7ELL, you got to give them TEL
w lers credit" Louis Birsky, the
real estater, said the day be
fore the McLemore resolution was tabled.
They amt throwing no bluffs, Zapp.
they're scared to death and they admit
il. Their idea is that if Germany kills
any more Americans that Germany would
90 to war with US, understand, SO Sen
ator Gore and this here McLemon wants
70 make a motion that if Germany kills
any more Americans it should be reck-
oned as suicide and not murder, and J.:
the policy amt been in force one year.
understand me, the insurance company
wouldn't got TO pay"
The insurance companies owns them
iellerS,' Barnett Zapp, the waist manu-
iacturer, commented.
The insurance companies IS got noth-
ing TO do with it, Zapp," Birsky retorted'
You are ike a whole lot Of people, Iapp.
You are always willing 70 abuse sen
ator You should ought 70 be careful
what you say about them iellers. They're
honest even if they would be towards.
Not that / don't think them poor Schi~-
miei, is right, at that Why should the
whole country 20 to wal just because
couple Of Americans gets killed.
"A couple amt much" zapp agreed
abe, how many Americans IS Germany
entitled 70 kill before we get mad enough
70 hghtl"
She amt told US yet" Birsky SAD
Who amt told us2' Zapp inquired.
Germany" Birsky fcpl'ed.
"AIe, why should Germany tell 'sf
zspp asked. Amt America big enough
country 70 know what 10 DO without ash
ing Germany hrst7'
Seemingly not" Bnsky replied.