Arizona republican., 1916-01-16
MAYOR YOUNG WILL NOT ISSUE
 PROCLAMATION AGAINST KISSING

promiscuous kissing. Forthwith he | issued I proclamation directing that ! during the continuance of the cpl | dernc all persons in every walk of life, | as far as possible, refrain from kiss ing. Of course the proclamation ere l ated no end of discussion, out statis 1 tics indicate that t was frightfully | ineffective. Indeed. there are those who say that there was more kissing in Camden following the promulga- | tion of the executive order than pre- viously. It seemed to "ineite| young and old. i Phoenix has no epidemic q influ- enza, but il is said there ag'e some l cases here. The fear that there might be spread of the malady Induced some public spirited citizens, to suggest to Mayor George Y T Young that he issue proclamation similar to that of the Camden executive. with the emergency clause attached
 Far from falling into the trap, Mayor Young expressed himself in no uncertain terms, both with refer
 ence to mayor that would issue such q proclamation as well as with reference to the proclamation itself 1 This mayor Ghe Camden eNecu- | tiVe) has given us westerners some new infcrmation-that is that Cam den is not live but an academic community said Mayor Yolng. Too much schooling too much of the wrong k.nd of parental authOrity-the young people not allowed to grasp just how small the world is, what life was intended to be-a place that must be oVerflowing with old maids, made so by fear-a place Roosevelt would scorn to live inbecause the
 men of Camden have no idea what
 q kiss is. and thus have proven
 their absolute unfitness to assume the responsibility of the ballot
 If this mayor is married his wife
 is to be pitied If he is not married
 then the most vicious suffra gette
 should pass him up. for if We analyze
 him, he is not in the nominative case,
 where he should be. and the subject
 of some good woman's loving, but he
 has proven himself strictly in the passive case. not fit to be left for a moment with the care of any good womans children.
 Parsed, he should be a noun, proper noun. alert. wide awake and an eye for the beast Beauty the ob- ject of every beautiful girls glance } in Camden, destepping from early a morn till late at night. evading those seductive harpoons. which wise and , beautiful woman. only, know how to ! throw. Those weapons that put a live man in Paradise while they are
 sinking in. and in Purgatory. after he , regainS consciousness and tries to eX- Q tract them.
 { But this mayor can never again
 make any claim to being a live one.
 He has hewn his own tombstone, and
 written his own epitaph Wise women
 will shun and silly ones pity him. , He has proven himself so completely in the passive case that he cannot
 claim to be even the subject of either
 q loving mother or a fighting father z We trust he is not married If he
 is let us all hope his wife hasn't dis
 covered just what she has in her . possession. Surely she could not have captured him. She must have
 found him simply standing in the . road. as an obstruction and kindly
 assumed charge of him to get him
 out of the way of others. Yet. again
 we might be wrong. It migh. have
 been some beautiful woman sat at
 his elbow and had him write that
 proclamation because of sinister de
 sires It may be he is hard to keen l | have the influence and some of her rivals did-who knows?
 But, anyway, a proclamation like that makes US wonder what this
 mayor would have done had he been
 in Adams place and had Eve to man. age. Now. Eve has been censured by more scatter -brained idiots who
 want to break out but have been
 too green to know how, and too
 cowardly to venture in an open way.
 We have always been strong for f Eve. Her critics have always re-
 minded us of the gambler inside the table telling the fellow outside how f to plaN or the undertaken who boast
 of his bank balance the banker tell ing the poor devil trying to stay away from ten to twenty per cent , interest how to conduct his business. or many of the other-no risk and , sure shOt-fellOws as advisors Re
 move the weaknesses and misfOrtunes
 of humanity, give them a pick and shovel, put them to work and make
 them assume the risk and the ma
 jority would starVe to death, and for
 these and many more reasons We
 have always resented the usual criti-
 cism of Eve.
 We make no claim of knowing
 much about Adam or Eve. The best
 We can do is to judge them by their photographs, and the way they
 played the game. Judging from Adams photograph, he was what the
 modern world would call a sissy He
 always posed standing. his hands
 down where his pockets ought to
 have been. The palms and eucalyptus
 in the background appear, to be
 moved by q gentle breeze, the lilies, mgnonettes, daffodils and columbine
 seem to be growing in profusion about his feet Birds of paradise and other sweet songsters sit upon the branches here and there. and ap-
 pear to be working overtime on their sweet songs of gladness, and we have often wondered, as we gaZed at the
 usual photograph of Adam. in which hn al hD fDr