davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06
CHAPTER VI.
The Ghost of Rome.

|
| "Stella Goodwin" Its rather q
pretty name" l thought, as read it OF
| the f1yleaf of a volume she had left il
Mrs. Berts sitting room. The volume
itself amused me = Chamberlain
Foundations of the Nineteenth Cen
fury" Fancy coming to the country
for a rest, and reading Chamberlain
most restless because most provocative
of books. was idly turning the
leaves when there was a rustic on the
stairs, and Miss Stella Goodwin en-
tered with a cheerful ''Good morning
''See here" said |. what are you
doing with this book, if you are off for
rest? This is no book for a nervous
wreck to be reading
Who said | was a nervous wreck p
she answered. I'm just tired, that's
all. / guess it's really spring fever
| saw a spear of real grass in Central
park, and ran away"
'From what?" | asked
From the dictionary" she replied.
''The which," said l.
1.-THE dictionary. Would you like Inc
to sing you song of the things that
begin with ''hy'?''
She laughed again. and began tc
chant in burlesque Gregorian, "Hyo
potamus. hyoscapuiar, hyoscine. Hyo-
scyamae. hyoscyamine. Hyoscyamus-'
stop" | cried. "You will have me
hypnotized. See. I'm on the 'hy's' my
self! Please eXplaiE-nOt sing"
WELL she laughed. you see its
this way. have to eat, drink. and try
to be merry, or tomorrow | die, so to
postpone tomorrow | am working on a
new dictionary. Somebody has to
work on dictionaries. you know. and
justify the pronunciation Of America
to man. I'm sort of learned, in a mild
harmless. anti-militant way. 1t isn't
fair to keep the truth from you
have a degree in phiology My doc
tors thesis was published by the press
of my kind university, at $3.50 per
copy, of which as many as seventeen
were sold. and I'm still paying up the
money | borrowed while preparing it
stood the dictionary pretty we'll down
to the 'hy's,' and then one day some
thing snapped inside of me, and l be-
gan to cry. That wouldn't have been
so bad. if l hadn't made the mistake
of crying on a sheet Of manuscript by
learned professor. about Hyoscya
mus (Which is genus of dicotyledo-
nous gamopetalous plants). and the ink
ran. Then l knew | should have to
take a rest in the cause of English
pure and well defined. SO here | am
The doctor tells me | must live out
of doors and saw wood"
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06
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golden throb of a hermit thrush so
close that the grace notes of his song
were audible, cool and liquid and love-
ly. The suddenness, the nearness, the
wildness of this song made it indie
scribably thrilling. and the girl and I
both stood rigid, breathless, peering
into the gloom of the pines. Again the
call rang out, but little farther away
this time, more plaintive, more fairy
like with distance. She took a step as
If to follow, and instinctively | put
out my hand, grasping her arm to re-
strain her. SO we stood and waited.
while from farther still, evidently from
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06
COUNTRY TOWN SAYINGS

Many man who is calling for help
might help himself
About the only thing the poor enjoy
as much as the rich, is love-
Never believe more than half the
story a man tells on his opposition.
For every man fooled by a woman.
probably twenty women are fooled by
men.
A polite man is great missionary:
l never meet polite man that L do
not resolve to be more like him.
When a thing goes wrong, and you
call in an expert, he says: 1T is cas-
lily fixed" But what time he has fix
ing it!
The success of your rival is dis
agreeable; shut stand it amiably, rath-
er than advertise the fact that you are
Jealous.
l have observed that my likes and
dislikes do not attract great excite
ment. And how restless people are
when l talk!
A little information picked up ev-
cry day soon becomes an education;
and little moral teaching picked up
every day soon becomes a sermon
You have no doubt blamed the peo-
pie Of Johnstown for their failure to
heed the warning of rotten dam. But
is there no unheeded warning ringing
in your ears at the present moment?-
Ed. Howe of Atchison in the Illus
trated Sunday Magazine.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06
SAWED-0FF SERMONS

When woman throws brick at an
old hen it is usually harder on the
adjacent scenery than it is on the hen
A cat may look the picture OF inno-
cence personifed, but it is just as well
to keep the door of the canary's cage
closed.
A blind man in Ohio got married re-
Gently and recovered his sight few
days later. Marriage is certainly a
great eye-opener.
The individual who places conf
dence in a confidence man would be
silly enough to look for intelligence in
an intelligence Office.
Unless a woman is willing to take in
washing and scrubbing to support the
family, she has no business to marry
man to reform him.
Remember, son, you can't please
everybody No matter in which direc-
ton you face you must of necessity
turn your back on half the world.-In-
dianapolis Star.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06

We walked TO the road. but TO my
surprise she did not turn toward the
village but toward Bert's. A sudden
light came.
Are you the broken-down boarder?'
| cried
The gurgle welled up. and the blue
eyes twinkIed. but she made no reply.
Just for that" said |, Il won't carry
back Mrs. Bert's basket"
As we entered the Temples yard.
Mrs. Bert stood in the kitchen door.
We'll. you two seem to have got ac-
quainted," she remarked in a matter
of-fact tone. Miss Goodwin. this is
Mr.. Upton | told you about Mr.. Up
ton. this is Miss Goodwin told you
about
Mrs. Temple" said |. you are an
other. You didn't tell me-
Young man" she retorted. where's
ny basket"
"Then you'll hev ter come home to
yer dinner tomorrow" she said
well. I'm willing" l answered.
81 guess you be-" said she.
At supper she returned to the
theme, which appeared to amuse her
endlessly. Miss Goodwin" she said.
Il want ter warn you tibet Mr.. Upton's
terrible afraid somebody's goin ter
advise him how ter build his garden.
He's a regular man"
| replied quickly: Your warning is
too late" said |: Miss Goodwin has
already begun by naming my place"
You can change the name, you
know" the girl smiled
How can I|' | answered, with
great sternness. Its the right one"
Whereupon I went up to my work
and listened to the sounds of soft sing
ing in the room across the hall
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06
SAYS THE OWL

Anyway, one-half the world
suspects how you live.
Give the average man advice
and he will pass 1t up.
There are two kinds of fools
ignorant and educated
The wise man lets the other
fellow do most of the taking.
Some mems idea of good luck
is to owe more than they can
pay.
There was time when thin
bles were an important part Of
a woman's jewelry.
Sometimes the man who says
just what he thinks has an i'm
pediment in his thoughts.
The average woman can
praise her husband to other
women without believing one
word she says
Probably there is no personal
sacrifice quite so great as that
of the misguided woman who
marries a man to reform him.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06
An EXPLANATION.

"Women are VIGOROUSLY unfair" re-
marked the scanty-haired bachelor,
yet justice is always represented as
a woman | wonder why this is thus?'
Because it is something a man Is
always after, l suppose" replied the
young widow.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06
SUNFLOWER PHILOSOPHY

Patriotism rarely consists of voting
a straight ticket.
When a man says plain talk he
means unpleasant talk.
that is due to cold feet.
Most men are busy enough not to
want to serve on jury.
A friend is useful institution il
you don't use hin too much.
Sometimes lire Of hot air is dig1t
fed by calling it a propaganda.
While, one is paying interest he
shouldn't lead too many reform move
ments.-Atchison Globe.
THINGS WE NEVER MISS
The SIS when dinner is an hour
late.
Our checkbook, when the bunch
goes broke.
That creaky step in the stair at two
a. N. on lodge night.
The boss in the elevator the one day
we took the table dhote with for
lunch.-Judge.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06
influenced.

''Of course you favor votes for WON
en-"
Il don't know" replied Mr.. Meek.
ton.
But you used to-"
Yes. But Henrietta has said 80
little on the subject of late that /
think she may have changed her
mind"
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06
Get Heat From Natural Spring.

At Acqui, Italy, water from a natur-
al hot spring is used to heat a large
hospital. The building, formerly a
school, has been piped, and the never
falling supply of boiling water also
furnishes all the water necessary for
washing and cleaning purposes, hence
no fires are required save for kitchen
uses. The spring is located in the
center of the city.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06
SYNOPSIS.

grow tired of my work as a college
instructor and buy New England farm
on sight | inspect my farm and go to
BOARD al Bert Temples. Bert helps me to
hlre a carpenter and a farmer. Hard
Clder, the carpenter, estimates the repairs
and changes necessary on the house. Mike
commences blowing. ] start TO prune the
orchard tree. Hard Cider builds book
cases around the twin fireplaces. Mrs
Temple lures Mrs. Pillig for me as a
housekeeper, and announces the coming
Of n rlor dom III Xnrlr
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06

with the children. One
egg to a cupful of milk
and a tablespoonful Of
III 6 ar will make two
small custards and the
consistency will be good
unless the custard is
wanted for holding. In
that case more egg viii
be necessary to make it
stand IN C,,n o,,etorl,
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06
POsTSCRlPTS

Figures compiled by the Italian gov
eminent show that the world produced
4,0O0,OOO,000 bushels Of wheat last
year, an increase of 100000 900 bush
els over the year before.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06

Supported by spectacle bows from
the ears, respirator has been invent
ed for surgeons, dentists and BARRIERS
to prevent their breath mingling with
that of patients or patrons.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06
W.. hlAk relQ.
How It's Done.

Political Boss-I can land you
Job payin' $4,000 year-two to you
and one to me.
Wonderland do l have an assistant
who does all the work?
Boss-Sure, and we split half of his
salary between US.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06
The Point of View

Mrs. Smith-Have you good cook?
Mrs. Brownies, she's good enough,
[ suppose-attends church three times
a week-but her cooking isn't anything
to brag of.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06

Around the central tube of a new
antiseptic telephone mouthpiece is a
container for disinfectants that give
off fumes in such way as to kill all
germs that enter the device.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06

Someone says that we halve our
troubles by telling them. Maybe. But
don't you ever believe that telling q
trouble twice will do away with it!
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06
His UndoinQ.

Gyer-I once knew chap who made
$4,000 a day for nearly a month
Myer-Indeedi Where is he now?
Gyer-In the penitentiary for coun.
erfeiting, l believe.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06

sauce" we are so accus-
toned to condiments of
various kinds that the ap-
petite fails if denied
them.
Condiments and spices
are used as adjuncts to
foods, and in themselves
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06

It is a lucky strike when merchan-
it has been getting.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06
II THE
t!EENN
1CABINETE
DAINTY CUSTARD.

Never go to meet a sorrow
That will wait unity tomorrow:
Never worry over troubles that are
past;
When you fill your mouth with mus
tard
Having thought that 1t was custard.
DO not let yourself, be flustered
But be happy in the knowledge
That the smarting cannot last
S. f. Kizer.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06

The iridescent fire in the opal is
due to the water in the gem, opals
being simply a mingling Of silica,
flint, and water?
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06

We have another theory that the
less you do for people and the more
you let them do for you, the better
they like you.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06

There are nearly forty thorough
fares in London with Enthusiastically
German names?
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06

After all is said and done we can
all agree to this extent: that nobody
ever trusts anything that can by any
stretch Of Imagination be called a
trust
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06

Sociologists estimate that among
every 1000 bachelors there are thirty
eight criminals, whereas married men
produce only eighteen per 1000?
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06

1t is believed to be no rare oc-
currence for a condor to soar to a
height Of four miles?
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06
M'CLARYGRAMS

The boss that's allus jumpin' fences
must keep hisself thin
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06

The government of New Zealand
is building fve-mile railroad tunnel
at cost of nearly s5,000,000 to give
close connection between the east and
west coasts of South Island.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06

Never end business sentence with.
out proposition.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06

A submerged oak forest covering
several square miles, from which logs
more than 100 feet in length have
been taken, was discovered by Rus
sian engineers while dredging a river.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06

The known coal areas of the United
States cover about 100000 square
miles and there are about 100000
square miles more that are believed
to be undertake with marketable coal.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06

Forty-eight materials, which come
from 1e countries. are used in the con.
struction of piano.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06

A worm objects to being interned,
especially In fish?
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06

For lessening automobile headlight
glare there has been invented a set
outer rim that they can be swung
across the lens as much as is desired.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06

The man who stretches and strains
prosperous than he really is, is send
ing out gilt-edged invitations to pow.
erty.-McClary's Magazine.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06

German photographers have found
they can electroplate paper for use in
their work without danger of it absorb
ing the plating bath liquid by first
coating the paper with varnish.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06

The man who pays as he goes sell
dom goes fast enough to overhead
himself
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06

A comprehensive subway is no nov
city to mole?
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06
CONDIMENTS IN FOOD.

In spite of Plutarch's aphorism that
hunger and salt should be mans only
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06

Better not have two coppers to rub
together and be at peace with the
world and the possessor of few good
friends than possess millions and be
alone in the world.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06

You say you envy the man with mil
lions for the luxuries he can buy, but
as a matter of fact you may be far
richer than he
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06
DOLLARS AND DINNER PALS

Most people measure business sue
cess by the amount Of money man
makes.
You want the money to buy COM
forts.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06

When bachelor, who be-
iieves himself impervious to
lovely woman's wiles, reaches
the age when he begins to think
that marriage is the better state
of life for man-and then meets
one Of those lovely Women-he
performs in manner highly
amusing to folks already mar
ried.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06

Custards of various kinds are always
1aVorite desserts and may be shared
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06

When a man says he has just been
married it sometimes puzzles one to
know whether he expects congratu-
lations or sympathy.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06

The man who rides by you in
limousine, while you sit near your
work and eat your dinner from a we'll
filled dinner pail, would often give the
car if he were able to eat the contents
of that pail with a relish.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06
Optimistic Thought

Labor is the foundation of wealth
of every country.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06
A FEW FOOLISH FACTS

Half loaf is better than railway
sandwich.
Ignorance is bliss, but 1t is often
wise to be foolish.
A good wife maketh a good hus-
band; the bad ones are self-made.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06

He envies you your freedom from
care, and your warm, true friends.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06

Never believe more than half the
story a man tells on his opposition.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06

Many a man who is calling for help
might help himself
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06

It is the state Of mind and physical
being which make for happiness.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06

If money will not buy comfort, of
what use is it?
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06

About the only thing the poor enjoy
as much as the rich, is love.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06

A cob is a small horse, but a cob
bier is smaller?
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06

For every man fooled by woman.
probably twenty women are fooled by
men.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06
DID YOU KNOW THAT

A handsome cobbler isn't a peach
cobbler?
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06

Better go without the dollars, If
you must have misery as running
partner.-Chicago American
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06

Peace and comfort cannot be bought
with shekels.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06

That is your object, is it not?
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06

iSUi CO COIupileu ny Tue ltdlldu gov.
eminent show that the world produced
4,000,000,000 bushels of wheat last
year, an increase of S00,0OO,OOO bush
els over the year before.
Supported by spectacle bows from
the ears, a respirator has been invent
ed for surgeons, dentists and BARRIERS
to prevent their breath mingling with
that of patients or patrons.
Around the central tube of a new
antiseptic telephone mouthpiece is
container for disinfectants that give
Off fumes in such a way as to kill all
germs that enter the device.
The government of New Zealand
is building a fve-mile railroad tunnel
at a cost Of nearly s5000,000 to give
close connection between the east and
west coasts of South Island.
German photographers have found
they can electroplate paper for use in
their work without danger Of it absorb
ing the plating bath liquid by first
coating the paper with varnish.
For lessening automobile headlight
glare there has been invented set
of spiral plates so mounted on the
outer rim that they can be swung
across the lens as much as is desired.
A submerged oak forest covering
several square miles, from which logs
more than 100 feet in length have
been taken, was discovered by Rus
sian engineers while dredging a river.
The known coal areas of the United
States cover about 100000 square
miles and there are about 100000
square miles more that are believed
to be undertake with marketable coal.
DOLLARS AND DINNER PALS
Most people measure business sue
cess by the amount Of money a man
makes
You want the money to buy COM
forts.
That is your object, is it not?
If money will not buy comfort, Of
what use is it?
Better not have two coppers to rub
together and be at peace with the
world and the possessor of a few good
friends than possess millions and be
alone in the world.
You say you envy the man with mil
lions for the luxuries he can buy, but
as a matter Of fact you may be far
richer than he
He envies you your freedom from
care, and your warm, true friends.
The man who rides by you in a
limousine, while you sit near your
work and eat your dinner from a we'll
filled dinner pail, would often give the
car if he were able to eat the contents
of that pail with relish.
It is the state of mind and physical
being which make for happiness.
Peace and comfort cannot be bought
with shekels.
Better go without the dollars, If
you must have misery as a running
partner.-Chicago American.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1916-06-06

A polite man is great missionary:
l never meet a polite man that l do
not resolve to be more like him.