davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Madison journal., 1916-01-15
Often Does.

Often Does.
China is going back to an abso-
Lutte monarchy"
Then China's going to smash
The Madison journal., 1916-01-15

,Che absence Of soft water is some
IS excuse for drinking hard.
The Madison journal., 1916-01-15

one pound Of good ofsa1 ~ %
tritiye as ;"D anu '.''
potatoes.
The Madison journal., 1916-01-15

Never invest in an alligator hide
pocketbook. It's a skin game.
The Madison journal., 1916-01-15
NJ, Grav Hairs hut Tired Eyes

20 Us look older than we are. Keep
or Eyes young and you Will look young.
Der the Movies Murine Your Eyes. Don't
your age. Murine Eye Remedy Co..
.S,ago, Sends Eye Book on request.
The Madison journal., 1916-01-15
a Winter Campaign.

Can't you get rid Of the cook?"
We'll. we are preparing for drive
inst her"
The Madison journal., 1916-01-15

lean sweepers-a new broom, and
raight flush.
The Madison journal., 1916-01-15

M Mai rne 'mmst have an operation for female
t1 tToube and hated to have done had dr5a DGfn
married only short time te T9TG Wd4e hayS ood 's ali the
pans pam da took LVdia E. Pnkhams Vegetable Com,
ponnd and % was cured and feel bstSr in 9geGy
Way. give you permission to publish c my yagan nans
because / am so thankful that H 1eel "en "san-
Mrs FRED BEHNKE, Marlnette' VS.
Do..o;t N;cb-"When first took Lydia T..
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-03-30
RINGS IN THE TRAMP'S SHOE
st. Louis Woman UnWittingIy Gives
Beeear $3.50 Worth of
JeWelry,

st. Louisa t~hinly-clad and poor
ly shod, but lucky tramp to whom
Mrs. c. L. Knapp, Pip Park avenue,
gave an old pair of shoes recently I'M
q~uestionably is fell fortified financial
ly against cold and want these frigid
days. In one of the shoes was a small
fortune to one who is down and out"
for it contained a 5000 diamond ring
and a garnet ring valued at $50.
Mrs. Knapp had placed the rings in
one of the shoes for safe keeping. A
few days later a tramp appeared at
the door and asked if she had any old
footwear she might give him. Forget.
ting about the gems ~reposing snugly
in the toe of one of the shoes, Mrs.
Knapp drew them forth and presented
them to the man. He left. Later she
remembered of the footwear being a
safe deposit vault, but it was too late.
Neither tramp, shoes nor rings have
been seen or heard of since.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-03-30
Boli;uor Women Endorse "Outsidle"
Treatment For Children Colds

burns, bruises, stings, piles and mus
Cular soreness.
Mrs. Porter says-"Vap-O-Rub iS
very fine for sore throat, rheumatism,
etc. / take pleasure in recommend
ing it."
Mrs. Jacques says-"I have used
several bottles of Vick's Vap-O-Rub,
and have found it better than inter
nal medicines"
Mrs. Ferret writes-"We have given
Vap-O-Rub a fair trial and find it ex-
cellent for Group, colds, sore throat,
etc. 1t is certainly fine for children. We
have also found it very good in cases
OF sunburn, fever sores and musGu-
lar rheumatism" Three sizes, 25c, SOC
or $1.00.
NoTIcE:-Last winter, in order to,
~acquaint their customers with Vap-O-
Rub, a number of druggists through
out the state presented complimentary
jars to a few of their customers, ON
condition that they give this prepare
ton a thorough trial and report the
results. By kind permission these re-
ports are now being used in this ser
ries of advertisements.
Co.. The Genuine has rF5SY'
WNIS@Rg@
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-03-30
NOT AFRAID OF WASHINGTON
Scotchman Credited With Giving
Sharp Answer When Rebuked by
the Father of His Country.

When the land for the present cap
ital was being secured the commits
sion appointed by President Washing
ton found it hard to persuade some
of the local landholders to part with
their fields. In Walks About Wash
ington,'' an old story, good enough to
be true, is told about n David Burns,
a canny Scot, who held out so long
that President Washington personally
undertook his conversion. After point
ing out to the farmer what advan-
tages he would reap from having the
government for a neighbor, the great
man concluded:
but for this opportunity, Mr.. Burns,
you might have died a poor tobacco
planter"
Aye, mon,' snapped Burns, and
had We no married the Wilder Gus
tbs, wi all her nagurs, ye'd ha' been a
land surveyor the moo, and a mighty
poor ane at that"
However, when he learned that UNI
less he accepted the liberal terms Of
| fered him, his land would be con-
demned and seized at an appraisal
probably much lower, Burns met the
president in quite another mood, and
to the final question, WELL, sir, what
have vol concluded to do?" astonished
everyone by his prompt response:
"Whate'er your excellency wad haze
me-"
On one of his fields now stands the
White House, and all adjacent lot be-
came Lafayette square.-Youtb's Com
panion.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-03-30
Pulled the Heavy Sled.

Midnight, of this city, went to the
camp with Rudolph Elsner, who had
come for help.
The doctor and his companion were
two days getting to the camp, and it
took two days for four men to pull
the young man to Roslyn. where a
sleigh was obtained to take him to the
hospital here. 1t was necessary to
amputate the injured leg below the
knee. He will survive, physicians be-
lieve. When the physician reached
him at Camp Creek Nelson was al
most dead.
The four men hitched themselves in
a harness similar to that used on dog
sleds, and in snow hip deep pulled
the heavy lad fourteen hours each of
the two days they were on the road,
This was done with almost no food.
The first day out all they had was a
cold fiapjack and a salt herring each.
Despite the narrowing experience OF
the long trip Nelson reached the hos
pital in better condition than when he
left the camp and rallied from the
operation.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-03-30

paper which the government buys at a contract price of 2925 cents is Ell
ing now in the open market at rs cents a hundred sheets. This means uat
the government will effect a saving of $15,975 if it purchases $500 boxes the
estimated consumption for the current fiscal year.
Typewriter ribbons are $3.50 a dozen in open market now, against the
contract price of $3.50. The saving here N $4,000 ribbons, the estimated
requirement for the year. will be $4,000.
On rubber bands the market price is now $15O a pound. The contract
Of the general supply committee is 81. The saving on 1854 pounds will be
S7342
There will be a saving of $4,000 o n muclage if the government uses ll5o
dozen quarts, as estimated. If 2142 dozen buck towels ire used, the saving
will be $1049. Purchases of diinfectant, if up to the estimate o. 12NEf kloS
will save 2,45G; purchases of 40O pounds of gycerin will mean a economy
Of $685..
Cement is one of the big items of saving If the purchases aggregate
1887 bags there will be a economy Of $1O164 under prevailing prices. The
saving in gasoline will amount to only $5012, if 4SS4S gallons are purchased
The government buys 10 closely that in a purchase of q adding machines
alone s13O3 was saved, while ST. 1862 was saved in the cost of 5400 pounds OF
glue and 5000 in 555 lettersHe filing sections. Another large saving was
$3.50 in the price If 694 desks. The close purchase of 119 revolving desk
chairs neted 1857, and s279 was saved in 2SO3 barrels of wheat'four.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-03-30
MADE GREAT BY ADVERSELY
Misfortune and Poverty Have Been
Means of Urging Men to Great
Accomplishments.

Adverse circumstances Ire fire.
quently among the foes, that, being
vanquished, bestow a blessing, Rev. ].
Frank Thompson writes in the Uni
v~ersalist Leader. 1t was a good
thing for the world that the loss Of
his fortune induced Thackeray to
become a writer. English literature
is indebted for the Pilgrims Prog
ress'' to the Imprisonment that COM
PEELED Bunyan to choose between
mental industry and madness. II
Hawthorne had not lost his position
in the customhouse he might never
have written THE Scarlet Letter" and
the books that followed it. Through
physical blindness Milton gained an
increase of spiritual vision. In the
sorrow of exile, and the lofty medita-
lions which were the only solace,
Dante found the inspiration of his
poem. It was while dwelling on the
Isle of Patmos, with convicts as his
only companions, that John received
his revelation. Willingness to suf-
fer for the truth which he pro-
claimed gave to the letters sent by
Paul from his Roman dungeon a pow
er beyond that Of the essays which
Seneca wrote upon his golden table.
1t was through resisting the tempta'
ton to save his life at the cost OF
his mission that Jesus added to the
wisdom of his teaching the perfect
example which had made him The
Light of the World"
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-03-30

Stephen Decatur. The Adams was engaged in the Mediterranean in the war
with Tripoi from 18003, and while still a midshipman Trenchard partict
pated in the famous attack on Tripoh in the latter part of the war, for which
service he was awarded a sword by congress in 1906, but as n o midshipman
rated a sword in those days, he was presented with a dirk such as the junior
officers Of the British navy wore.
Trenchard became a lieutenant in 1907, and the commission issued to
him at that time, bearing the signature of Thomas Jefferson, is exhibited in
the case. A little later, after serving on the Constellation and the Constitu
war of 1924 he was in command Of the Oneida and the Madison in several
engagements.
Capt. Edward Trenchards son, who was named Stephen Decatur Trench
ard, after the captains friend, had even a more interesting career than his
father, who died at the age of forty years, after "a years service. Stephen
Decatur Trenchard was born in Brooklyn, N. Y, in 1918. He was appointed
midshipman in 1884. On August IA, 1856, while again serving on coast sur.
vey work he rendered prompt and efficient service in tn. rescue Of the Brit.
ish bark Adieu, wrecked off Gloucester. Mass, saving all hands and the
entire cargo for which he was presented with a beautifully decorated sword
BY the British government, and a gold watch by the underwriters OF the
bark. The watch and sword are both on exhibition.
With the opening of the Civil war Trenchard was put in command of
the keystone State, which arrived at Norfolk just as the navy yard was
burning. and assisted in saving some Of the government property. He was
anerward in command of the Rhode Island, a supply and dispatch ship,
which ws later converted into a heavily armed cruiser. He was present At
both bombardments of Fort Fisher.
He was retire. in 1880, and died in New York city in 1885,.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-03-30
MUST COME HOME SOBER
Civic League Of Goshen VIII Prose
cute Those Who Go Away
to Drink.

Goshen, Ind.-The Civic league Of
Goshen has given official notice that
it will prosecute all persons who go
from this ~saloonless community to
Elkhart, ten miles away, become
drunk there and ride home on trac-
ton cars.
League managers call attention to
the law of 1918, under which intoxi.
Gated persons on traction or steam
cars and in railway stations are guilty
of misdemeanor, punishable by heavy
fine and Jail imprisonment. Late cars
on the Chicago, South Bend and
Northern Indiana Traction line be.
tween Elkhart and Goshen have car.
ried many drunken persons since
Goshen voted against tho saloons.
Employees of the traction company
are unable to meet the situation,
which is serious.
Requests Of the Civic league that
the offenders be arrested have been
ignored by the Elkhart police. mem
bers Of the league say.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-03-30
Diseases Of Autois,s.

When the bicycle was in the lime
light. and the daily papers would pub
lish most anything connected with the
subject that came to them, the doc
tors began to discover, or rather in
vent. many new and fearsome diseases
that they claimed to result from riding
the wheel. The docto-l sot their
names into the papers, but the dis
eases a~terialized. Now, some
e%nterprising member of the medical
fraternity has discovered a peculiar
knee trouble tLat he claims to result
from continued use of the clutch and
brake pedals. 1t vii, probably join
"kiphosis biclarum' in Oblivion after
it serves it's purpose as a newspaper
item.-Scientific American.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-03-30

they lined up, Indian file, and prepared to take a string of baths that would
have extended far into the middle of next week if someone had not
speeded up. E11
Willis Davis looked over the situation and decided that if he wanted to
take a bath he would have to lave his fine physique in the cleaning waters
of the river flowing near at hand. Therefore he gathered up his buds and
wandered. down to the banks and found a pool overshadowed by a beautiful
growth of semnropc trees. Nature regned supreme except for the presence
Of one of Floridahs citizens, who appeared to have dressed from a rag bag.
He asked Willis if he were preparing to take a swim.
yep" said Willis.
The stranger sat on a log and waited.
Il don't suppose there are alIgators left in this river?" suggested Willis.
81 don't know if there is Dr. not killed twelve of the critters in this yer
uol last week, but l don't know eff any is left IT not"
Whereupon Willis spoiled that strangers fun by refusing to go in swim
ming.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-03-30
THIS STORY HAS NO MORAL
Simply Tells How LATEST man In the
World May Become a Famous
Efficiency Expert.

Once upon e time there was a man
who was known as the LATEST man
in the world. He spent most Of his
time trying to figure out how he could
avoid anything that had even a family
resemblance to labor. He slept late
mornings, and loafed all day. He was
proud Of his record. and boasted that
he had never done a hands turn in
his life. The neighbors shook their
heads over him and predicted all
sorts of awful things for him in the
future.
The wheels of administration re-
volved and the LATEST man in the
world found himself, all unexpectedly,
appointed postmaster of the village, a
writer in Judge says. He took up his
new duties with a sigh, fearing a blot
on his hitherto unblemished panache
of idleness. But his talent for avoid
ing work saved him. and it was not
long until that post Office was full of
devices which enabled the LATEST
man in the world to spend his time
around the stove with the rest of the
boys while the governments business
took care of itself.
Not long after the Inauguration OF
this era of millenial inactivity an
inspector zane shopping around those
parts. He entered the post office. of
the LATEST man in the world prepared
to make trouble. He took one look
at the arrangements and fled to the
telegraph office, and the postmaster
general was in receipt of several
dozen winged words that night.
The LATEST man in the world is
now employed at a fabulous remunera'
ton as an efficiency expert.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-03-30
PLEADS OWN DIVORCE CASE
Mrs. Partains Secures a Decree From
the Court and the Custody of
Her Child.

Colusa, Cal.-Mrs. Essie Partains Sc
cured a divorce from Joseph Partains.
Partains was represented in the pro-
ceedings by Attorney Willard and
Mrs. Partains handled her own case.
Judge Anderson Of Woodland pre-
sided, sitting for Judge Weyand, who
was disqualified on account Of having
at one time acted as attorney for Mrs.
Partains.
Judge Anderson rendered a decision
granting Mrs. Partains a divorce,
awarding her the custody of the minor
child of two years, and ordered the
father to pay 81 a month for its sup
port. Mrs. Partains is an employee
of the state accident commission in
San Francisco.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-03-30
Instead Of Dosing Delicate Little Stem
achs They Recommend the External
Treatment -- Vep.O.Eub.

Mrs. NJ. J. Porter, and Mrs. ].
Jacques, of Bolivar, Mo-, and Mrs. M. E.
Ferret, on Rural Route No. 2, like all
intelligent mothers, believe internal
medicines are bad for children, and
yet cold troubles must have some kind
of treatment. When Vick's Vap-O-Rub
was introduced here from the South
last season these ladies found it filled
the need exactly. Vap-O-Rub is
a salve, which, when applied to the
warmth of the body, is vaporized by
the body heat. These vapors, inhaled
with each breath, carry the medication
through the air passages to the lungs,
and, in addition, Vick's is absorbed
through the skin, relieving the tight
ness and soreness. This two fold
action makes Vap-O-Rub useful for
a wide variety of infammations-from
determinations of the air passages and
lungs, such as head colds, catarrh,
asthmatic troubles, bronchitis and
deep chest colds-down to inflamma-
lions of the skin and tissues, such as
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-03-30

Lydia E. Pinkham's Vegetable Com
pound would cure it. 1t helped both
the Change of Life and the tumor and
when l got home / did not need the DOCTOR
1 took the Pinkham remedies until the
tumor was gone, the doctor said, andL
have not felt it since. l tell every one
how I was cured. If this letter viii
help others you are welcome to use il"
Mrs. E. H. BEAN, 525 Joseph Avenue
Nashville, Tenn.
Lydia E. Pinkham's Vegetable Com
pound, g pure remedy containing the
~extractive properties of good old fash
toned roots and herbs, meets the needs
of woman's system ct this critical period
of her life. Try it
If there is any symptom in your
ease which puzzles you, write to
the Lydia Il. Pinkham Medicine
Co., LYNN, Mass.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-03-30

tunes emanated from the instrument The effect upon the force was as
remarkable as it was instantaneous. BARRIERS rushed back and forth from
chair to wash basin with lively steps, cut capers around the BARRIERS chair
as they shaved customers and otherwise displayed a surplus amount of
energy which had long lain dormant.
Recently the young southerner in charge of the boohack department
adopted a regular program for the day, beginning with Dixie" when the
sleepy BARRIERS arrive in the wee small hours of the morning" and ending with
the "StarSpangled Banner" when the hands of the clock denote that closing
time has arrived At night.
When a man asked the ragtime expert what tune he would play if he was
tipped a q quarter, that worthy placed a record m the machine and soon were
heard the bold strains of "Theren Be a Hot Time in the Old Town Tonight"
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-03-30
DRAW INJURED MAN
28 MILES ON SLED
Four Companions Tug Woodsman
Over Snow to Hospital and
Life Is Saved.

Gle Elum, Wash.-By the utmost SUI
perhuman efforts Of four men, who
pulled him on an improvised sled
made of two skis, through deep 10Y
for twenty-eight miles, Robert Nelson,
of Seattle, was saved from death. Mel
son, who was working at a mine neal
King Solomon mountain, cut the great
artery open near the ankle January 8
and suffered severe hemorrhage. No
physician was called to the aid Of Mel
son for many days. Finally DR.. F. W.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-03-30
RECEIPT FOR DARKENING
YOUR GRAY HAIR

Do this-Apply like a shampoo Q-Ban
Hair Color Restorer to your hair and
scalp. After a few applications you
will be delighted to see all your gray,
faded, prematurely or gray streaked
hair turn to an even beautiful dark
shade. Q-Ban is harmless, no dye,
but makes scalp and hair healthy so
all your hair whether gray or not is
made soft, lustrous, wavy, thick, even
Iy dark and handsome. Insist on hav-
ing Q-Ban. 1t is ready to use and
sold on a money back guarantee. SOC
for a big bottle sent prepaid or at drug
stores. Address Q-Ban, Front ST..
Memphis, Tenn. Adv.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-03-30

received a collection of naval relics
pertaining to the services rendered by
Capt. Edward Trenchard, and Rear
Admiral Stephen Decatur Trenchard,
between the years 1900 and 1880.
An officers sword, a dirk, two
commissions, a map, and a manuscript
journal relate to the career of Edward
Trenchard. He vas born in Salem,
N. j., in 1884, and entered the United
States navy as midshipman on April
80, 1900. His first cruise was on the
eloon of war Adams. under the valiant
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-03-30

WOllen, Une OF n sIOpS on LH6 LOuI
was in a hotel far from the beaten
path. This matter of isolation evil
IDENTIFY accounted for the fact that
there was but one bathroom in the
entire hosiery, and it was a rather
discouraged-looking bathroom at that.
However, the party had travelled
a long and dusty distance, and every
one had beea looking forward to nice
cool white tubs and clean towels.
When this regiment Of women found
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-03-30

IMITATION IS slNcEREST FLATTERY
but like counterfeit money the imita-
ton has not the worth Of the original.
Insist on La Creole" Hair Dressing
it's the original. Darkens your hair in
the natural way, but contains no dye.
Price s1.00.-Adv.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-03-30

treatment, anu VIII
say that / have been in good health
since and able to do considerable
work at the advanced age of seventy
two. l am glad you induced me to
continue their use at the time, as l
am cured.
Dodd's Kidney Pills, SOC per box at
your dealer or Dodds Medicine Co.,
Buffalo, N. Y Dodd's Dyspepsia Tab
lets for indigestion have been proved.
Soc per box.-Adv.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-03-30

cannot reduce commercial prices anu
still make money.
Among the interesting compare
sons shown in the records of the gem
eral supply committee, under the con-
tracts of which organization govern
ment purchasing agents here make
purchases, is that of the price of gas
oline. These records show that the
government just before the close OF
the last fiscal year was paying IL
cents a gallon, while 23 cents was the
price in the open market. Carbon
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-03-30

NOR as large rs q
.child's head. The
doctor said it was
three years coming
and gave me medi-
cine for it until 1
was called away
from the city for
some time. OF
course / could not
lgo to him then, SO
my sisterin-law told
lme that she thought
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-03-30

Dodd Kidney Pills.
1t is now three
years since l fin
ished taking these
Pills and l have had
no trouble with my
kidneys since. l
was pretty bad for
ten or twelve years
prior to taking your
- Ill
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-03-30

SOAP is STRONGLY ALKALINE
and constant use will burn out the
scalp. Cleanse the scalp by shampoo
ing with LA Creole Hair Dressing,
and darken, in the natural way, those
ugly, grizzly hairs. Price. $l.OO.-AdV'
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-03-30

Children who are delicate, feyerish and cross
will get immediate relief from Mother Gray's
Sweet Powders for Children They cleanse the
stomach, act on the liver, and are recommended
for complaining children. A pleasant remedy
for worms. Used by mothers for % years. All
Druggists, CSC. Sample FREE. Address, Mother
Gray Co., lie Roy, n. Y.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1916-03-30
COVETED RY ALL

but possessed by few-a beautiful
head of hair. If yours is streaked with
gray, or is harsh and stiff, you car re.
store it to its former beauty and lus'
ter by using La Creole Hair Dress
ing. Price s1.00.-Adv.