The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1916-06-22

n hum a paper with picture in it
!. that ere big nosed Gar Ferdinand
II Bulgaria, and says /, What do yc
= think of him?' And as quick as
flash he answered right back, Goo,
ness only nosep just like that!"
e Put down the number of the mont
! In which you were born; multiply hi
t by six; then add two naughts. Mul
tiply the sum by 50; add your age an
that of your brother-in-law; subtrac
1865; add the date of the discovery o
America. Take away the two figure
at the right and suffix them to tn
left. Add any number you happen t.
think of and subtract three times a
much. Then take a headache pow
der. The result will be the majority
the next president will receive at the
polls.
NO" said Old Bill Misgivens, al
never was in the show business myself
but / had friend, Ezra Petro, who
used to manage side show of human
freaks. Ezra told me a good deal
about his experiences. He said there
was lot of interesting things con-
nected with the show business, but
that it used to get on his nerves.
Each one of them freaks said Ezra,
had to be handled in different man
ner from any other freak For in
stance there was the Human Ostrich.
Ezra heard Of him in Australia, and
paid big price to get him in his
show, He was wonder, all right, ac-
cording to Ezra's tell. He would eat
broken glass, scrap iron, chunks of
earthenware, barb wire, rusted tin
dippers, chunks of granite, vitrified
brick and other truck of that kind,
and appear to enjoy it. For dessert
he would call for a dish of single
nails and carpet tacks, but the re-
markable thing was that that Teller
was the most particular man you ever
saw when It come to taking a regular |
meal. He wouldn't eat hardboiled |
eggs, for instance, because he had
heard they was hard to digest, and so
the cook had to make up special dish
es for him such as soft toast and |
5tewed pie plant. Ezra says the
freak finally died with indigestion
,aused by taking bite of green ap-
pie. When they held post norton
md opened his stomach they found a
pound of nails, the broken pieces of
4 milk crock, a piece of a stove lid
md the remnants of two soda pop
'ottles. These hadn't bothered him
my. IL was that bite of green apple
hat did the business. But Ezra said
he freak that really gave him the
most trouble was the doubIeheaded
nan. He said that he never saw a
nan in his life who was so blamed
ard TO get along with himself as that
wo-headed man. The two heads never
greed on anything. One of the heads 4
vas a red hot, standpat Republican Q
nd the other was a regular moss v
acked Southern Democrat. During
he campaign that two-headed man y
,ould lie awake half the night argu- a
no with himself. Each one of the !,
eads would accuse the other of being ;,
fool and liar, and so blamed ignor- .
mt that it didn't know straight up. II
nut Ez'a said that on the question
f religion he had more trouble with
ne two-headed man than on any 9th
r subject. One of the heads was
.rong BAPTIST and the other insisted ,
nat the Methodist was the only (
1urch that was anywhere near right.
he Baptist head wanted to join that v
lurch and be baptized and the Meth
list head said he would be burned il
e would stand for it. The two heads p
OF so worked up about the matter it
lat there were weeks at time when G
ley wouldn't speak TO each other. 81
he Baptist head got sullen and mop .,
and wouldn't eat Ezra said that K
; tried to settle the differences and &C
'rsnade the two heads to agree on pl
me church they could both Join as ''>
compromise, but neither one would 81
,ree. Finally Ezra thought of the m
heme of dipping one head and one ba
g and half the body and finally got 10
e Baptist head to agree to that, al w;
ouch it insisted that it wasn't really |
e kind of baptism man ought to II
we; but maybe it could slip through NV
that under the circumstances. Then
IRA said that he struck another DIFF Re
ulty. One of the heads was a strong re
and the other believed !
personal liberty as it called it.
lie prohibition head was great on NJ
aking temperance speeches and one Dc
" just before it was to make a talk M,
the beauty of total abstinence that r,