davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Daily capital journal. (Salem, Oregon) 1903-1919, 1916-10-14

Well, we does our little bit, tn prof.
and me. and then 1t comes time t
clear the tent.
''On the outside! The out-side!--"
crates the prof., herdin' out the cattle.
They all 1ostles out--all but Moscow.
He crouches down around the far
corner Of the tank an stays.
When the tent is full Of emptiness,
up he bobs, leans over the edge of
tn tank, and "Sim," says he, "Sim,
it's real huge 1T, this mimical con
OF yours. marked up as the greatest
ever, and calculated to pull down more
coin than anybody can have an be
decent. Bat!" The waggles his head
at mel But now let me tell you
honest. 1t amt quite artistic enough,
an that's the livin. For example,
"Gwan!' growls at him. "Clear
out! No man what handles fangless
reptyles has any call"
Dear me, such langwidge!" he pro-
tests, mild as rabbits milk. I'm dis
combobulated. honest l am, to hear
such from a lady mermaid! An
moreover, just think how imprudent
it would be of you to holler-now
wouldn't 1t? Sort of shake public
confidence, an all that, eh? Down
Lucy, down, there's a good, nice lady
mermaid"
He reaches out an hits me a cracl
over the sea-weed on my brow with
his long cane.
Down, Lucy. down." he repeats
and his tone for pure Acne insulting
ness was tn top-nitcher OF all time
81 amt through with you yet" sayi
he, resumin' his mild manners. Com
pose yourself; there's another buncl
OF e. Us due in three minutes. Set
you tomorrow" says he, land we viii
resume the sport. Mermaid hunting
nothin' like 1t; greatest ever!"
Must ha' changed his mind abou
waitin' till o-morrow-maybe though
Id put tn prof. wise. an have hin
excluded, which sure would havi
done--for,- anyhow, back he comes in
side OF an hour, an with him a coupl
OF huskies with such low brows, tha
their hair tangles their eyelashes. Th
three OF 'em fronts up to our tank
along of a big an spellbound crowd
an none O. tie audience seems NOR
plumb interested than them three
: Moscow's sleeve looks bulgy.
The prof. ho seems uneasy and Of
. his guard. l notices the stream o
| water amt comm in, and judges Bee
is bein' held as a reserve for immeji
action in case O. need. My nerves |
J all to the dippy. SO / can't hardly d
my stunts at all, and the prof. ha
! to more than prod. Every time
, nips or dives, "Gee!' thinks I, "thi
] here is just prolongin' the agony
!. I'm sure workin' a shell.game on my
3 SELF" thinks I, an the sweat begin
, to ooze. An every time comes VI
3 there still stands Moscow MacShan
? and his L. BIS just smilln'--smilin
, That bulgy sleeve feezes me. .
4 Make h, dive again. profe- or!
: speaks up one OF the :, D's. inr !. y
4 like, tossjn' per W ~ = Y sd
can find 1t II TIL hottom. she CO
see best in a dim ljsBt. can't she?"
Daily capital journal. (Salem, Oregon) 1903-1919, 1916-10-14
BY George Creei.

Written for the Democratic National
Committee.
As never before, the United States is
prosperous.
1t is "loaded dice" business that
Woodrow Wilson has hurt, not lcgiti.
mate business. In view of FACTS, the
cry that business men are against
Wilson is tantamount to an accusation
that the business men of the United
States are pack of fools.
We weathered the crash of the Euro
pean war without Il panic such as cursed
the country in 1903 and 1907.
In the last three years, manufactured
products have increased by $9,400,000,-
900, and less than. one per cent OF this
vast total is furnished by munition ex-
ports.
There are no more bread lines; there
is no unemployment, agriculture has
been given new life and industry is driv-
ing forward with new and tremend.
Gus energy The wealth of the nation
has increased 4l,000,0 100000 under
Woodrow Wilson.
The answer is not to be found save
in the financial, economic and industri.
VI Teioriu erected Dy tne - Man III the
White House. He drove through the
Federal Reserve bill that ended the sci.
fish rule of Wall street, and that in the
face of republican prophecies of "ruin
and disaster.''
This law has lifted tho fear of pan.
les; il has ended psury; il has per.
mitted government funds for the move.
ment of crops; il has made ercdi nc.
cessible to legitimate enterprise.
The Rural Credits Law is the Magma
Charta for the farmer; the Clayton law
took much of the hate out of Industry
the Scamen's law has put American
sailors back on the high seas; the Fed.
eral Trades commission is waging a
winning fight against extornon and
monopoly; the tariff commission has
taken n question of vital Importance
ont of politics, and the child labor law.
the eight hour day and the workmen y
Compensation has energized industry as
well as humanized ii.
And Mr.. Hughes asks that these con-
ditions be deserted in favor of return
to panics, unemployment, breadlincs,
and government by greed.
Daily capital journal. (Salem, Oregon) 1903-1919, 1916-10-14

Catarrhal Deafness Cannot Be Cured
by local applications, as they cannot
reach the diseased portion of the ear.
There is only one way to cure catarrhal
deafness, and that is by constitutional
remedy. Catarrhal Deafness is caused
by an inflamed condition of the mucous
lining of the Eustachima Tube. When
this tube is inflamed you have a rum
bling sound or imperfect hearing, and
when it is entirely closed, Deafness is
the result. Unless the inflammation
can be reduced and this tube restored
70 its normal condition, hearing will bk
destroyed forever. Many cases of deaf
ness are caused by catarrh, which is an
inflamed condition of the mucous sur
faces. Halls Catarrh Cure acts thru
the blood on the mucous surfaces of the
system.
We will give One Hundred Dollars
for any case of Catarrhal Deafness that
cannot be cured by Halls Catarrh Cure.
Circulars free. All Druggists, 75c.
F. J. CHENEY & CO., Toledo, o.
Daily capital journal. (Salem, Oregon) 1903-1919, 1916-10-14
THE Me r M AID

the 'Subaquaticus Humanlformus, 4"
says ne, reachin' over and strokin'
my snout. Highly intelligent. too.
Go fetch, Lucy!" An he heaves a
piece o. wood for me to retrieve.
"Most unfortunate, they require q
dim light. like in tn caves an fast
nesses of their native abodes among
tn coral reefs" says he, "or you could
mark an behold the iridiscent colors
an beautiful contoors Of this extry-
ordinary large specimen, captured
alive after a desprit struggle by Colo
mel Lysander Webb, K.C.B., on the
9th OF last March. off tn coast Of
Van Diemen's Land, in tn China Sea
and now exhibited at tremendous ex-
lpense-only one ever in captivity!
They don't survive long in fresh
water" says he. pointin at the spout
where Beef Westerhood is putin in
his best licks, land direct daylight is
fatal to 'em immejt. We will now
pass out, ladies an gents, to permit
another audience in to witness this,
the greatest marvel of all the ages.
Kindly pass on the outside. ladies! !!
out-side!"
It used to be, "Pass ON the in.side!"
but now it's tough work to keep tn
mob shiftin' at all. Fact is, we're the
broad-gage dream.pill pushers OF the
Pike inside of week, the only orig
inal charter-members OF the Gel
There Club. All the others has to
take our dust; Shamdow the Chain
breaker. Nine. Claire the Medium
Moscow the Snake M,g, an all-'spe
cially Moscow. M to know Mos
COW, understand, when his name was
MacShane. an you could pat all the
love lost between US in your eye with
out seem none the worse; SO 1t didn'
worry me much about his business
goin' to the blinks. Oh, tell you
the mermaid bunch was just swampet
in a tidal-wave OF rejoicin'. We sure
was goin' some! But it's. juet thii
very pace of ours that cut the fina
crimp in our gears-as you'll see al
in its good an proper time. DON
rush the hearse.
For one day along the beginEln' o
our third week since the boss grew ,
spike.tail coat an the title OF pro
fessor, ! notices this same Moscow
MacShane in among the bunch o
L.. z Marx. There's a difference be
tween them an him, though, and
; don't look extra salubrious, neither
They're all standin' with open traps
gorgin' the prof.'s science. while he'
lurkin' by the far end Of the tank
deaf to the spiel, but all there witt
; the optics. And as he pipes me b
smiles contented, in way that give
me sudden attack OF blighted pros
|, pecks. That smile makes me feel lik
bein' dropped from the top story Il
one o. them sudden elevators; grow
that dopey the prof. has to jab m
, with his pointer - make me paddl
an retrieve. And all tn time In
performin', Moscow is givin' me senss
J, tions like when you sprinkle sugar o
) oysters. My blood's runnin' col
, en""ph TO freeze tn tank.
Daily capital journal. (Salem, Oregon) 1903-1919, 1916-10-14
BINDING $4,000 LICENSES

Hunting, angling and the combine,
tion hunter s and anglers licenses are
now being boud at the Rodgers Papes
compay's plant on Ferry street. Civil
War veterans receive special license,
which is given to them free of charge.
About 250o of these special licenses am
to be distributed. Fifteen thousand of
the combination hunters and angler
licenses are printed and being bound.
The anglers license is on white card
board, the resident hunters on blue
cloth and in number 10000. The num-
Der of anglers licenses is $4,000.
These licenses, when bound, will bo
returned to the state house and it is
probably they will then be sent to the
fish and game commission office in
Portland for distribution.
Daily capital journal. (Salem, Oregon) 1903-1919, 1916-10-14


"Eels, yes. Eels and-and SUCH
lAnythin' marine, you understand. Ger
tainly. Marine food. that's 1t, such
as grows natural on them ther- coasts
lof Van"
Hang tn diet!" speaks up L. B.
Number 1. al wants to see her stay
under water!" \
Same here!- An here!-" persists
the crowd, which now is gettin' un-
ruly an hilarious. All this time.
Iy'understand, I'm in despair so black
liz makes SCOT snow-white by COM
parison. Make 'er stay down.
Down!" shouts some In that jostlin',
pushin' mob Feed 'er!" vociferates
others.
The poor old prof.--say, had to
pity him, spite O. my own bloody
sweat. He grips his resolution, leans
over an pats me lovin' on the nozzle-
olive, Lucy!" he commands in a
tremblin' voice. olive, an stay down
"a spell"
Here's my speedy end" thinks I.
"but I'll croak game. An Lord help
III fish they filings to mel" gnashes
my teeth preparatory to doin' murder
vicariously on Moscow, MacShane in
the person of said fish. It's all dark
an slippery down there on CHI bottom;
can't more than see glimmer. From
above | hear a rumble o. voices.
Then all OF a sudden | sees some
thin swmmin round-kind Of fish
thing, big an brown. My lungs feel
like they was just plumb goin q,
bust every second, but makes graz
at the fish-thing, misses, makes an
other, lands on it with my left, grap-
pies with my right, closes in and grips
till my knuckles crack. feels tho
fish.critter give; there's sudden lash
an tangle-the water boils. Q
And then-then- Gee Whilhkens!
Ow! 90! Oooooo!- Somethin' ex-
lplodes. Somethin' hits me. What is
lit? Where am L? Sparks an fire
envelope me! Can't let go-an' I'm
all tied up in bow-knots myself. Jump
in jewsharps! Bout million volts
of red-hot current racks my frame.
Whoof!- UP surges, blind, deaf.
chokin'.
Plumb in the eye MacShano lands
me one. Down goes backward
splash head over tail, down souscs
under water again, gulps gallon an
comes up just explodin' with a whoof!
whoofi that blows th' drink clean
over that hilarious mob of cutthroats.
But this time the prof. has numbered.
Beef comes a shown and the outside
man, too-there's reinforcements.
; makes my get-out O. the diabolish
tank that time--falls, on my map. out
side, and lays spranglin', all tied ~
in my tail 'mongst the feet of tiiat
stampedin', fghtin', roarin' multitude
, Mac. he drives kick at me just al
! Beef hands him right hook on the
ear. He drops. I'm top OF him in q
|. wink, and the l.. BIS, the prof, ths
outside-man an Beef is top of us both
An after that it's just pure cannibal
!, ism, with tn mob weepin' itself sick
!, fer Joy, an screechin' "Perlice!"
Perlice? Sure they come-after a
while. But there's no tent left, nothin
but ribbons.
- Fact is, all tn good them perller
done was shoot that there mermaid
, food O. mine-that eel-that ther1
: million-volt electric eel.
Say. you tumble?
.(Cobwighi. The Frank 4. Mnnsey Coz
Daily capital journal. (Salem, Oregon) 1903-1919, 1916-10-14
Philadelphia Society Woman
to Explore the Amazon

Newport, R. l., Oct. 14.-Unexpeeted
lungles enmeshing the Amazon river
no terrors for Mrs. A. Hamilton Rice,
who is expected to sail from here today
with her husband, DIR. A Hamilton
Rice, the South American explorer, for a
voyage into the unknown upper reaches
of the greatest river in the world.
Mrs. Rice, formerly Mrs. George d..
Widener, a Philadelphia society leader
was saved when her husband went down
with the Titanic.
DR.. and Mrs Rice, with three mem
bers of the London Geographical society
which is financing the expedition, en-
bark on the steam yacht Alberta, once
owned by King Leopold II. of Belgium
and presentaed to DR.. Rice by the Bar.
Daily capital journal. (Salem, Oregon) 1903-1919, 1916-10-14
PROMPT ACTION SAVES
FROSTED sILo CORN

Thousands of acres of Willamette
Valley corn, even though it has been
frosted can be safely and economically
put into the silo il harvested and stored
promptly says g. r. 'Hyslop, head of
the crops department of the Agricultur.
al college.
Unusually early frosts this year
caught great deal of corn intended
for the silo stage. Much of the corn,
even the early varieties, was hit by
Daily capital journal. (Salem, Oregon) 1903-1919, 1916-10-14

| breaks away, sits up an looks at
him. He ditto at me. TIL big, round
mob ditto at both Of US. Then, sud
denly, l falls to who he reely Is.
"Why. Beef Westerhood!" says I,
rubbin' my shoulder where the ground
Topped up an pasted it. why
Beef! That you? Where's tn
whiskers you used to float? An why
this unfamiliar corporosity? Is 1t
you, or who is 1t?
He scans me faithful minute,
herdln' together his memories; then
his face folds into a grin, and out
comes tn joyous palm at me.
"Sim!"
Beef"
Twelve years that we amt so much
as batted an eye on each other Is
bridged in wink. while III crowd
stretches red. cordy necks.
"Im sure astounded," murmurs to
him. dustin off my raiments. ito find
you engaged in q flaked.breaklast-fo0d
brace game. You, you of all honest
fakirs, perpetratin' a mermaid"
"Fergit IT." he whispers, with
uraWln me inside the tent, away IRON
that oyer-inQuisitive bunch Of horny
handlers. "Ferglt 1t! Times has un
derwent painful changes since you an
me paraded up Popularity Aynoo tC
the rattle Of pill In walnut.shell
It's a case with me OF gan what's
offered. now. an no comers barred
But" he adds wistful, can you i'm
prove this here lay? You always wal
snappy with tn thinks. Can you dopt
ginger into our modest attempt to pu
tn Jacks under this rural currency"
"Can I? Well. some!"
"Fine an dandy! Percolate rount
tonight aft'r tn Pike closes. II
knock you Gown to tn boss, an wei
| rag-chew. Just ncw Bsefy to III
Daily capital journal. (Salem, Oregon) 1903-1919, 1916-10-14

war prosperity is permanent, or that il
can be depended upon to endure after
the war as effectively as he has al
ready destroyed the fiction that "he
has kept US out of war;" So valuable
q contribution to the campaign does
Governor Hughes regard Mr.. Roosevelt 8
speeches that he has had each of them
carefully printed in good type and they
are being sent free to all who apply for
them to the Republican National com
mittee, New York City.
Daily capital journal. (Salem, Oregon) 1903-1919, 1916-10-14
PRAISES WILSON'S STAND
IN BEHALF OF SUFFRAGE.

The action of the National
Woman Suffrage association at
Atlantic City, N. j. in rejecting
by an overwhelming vote the
proposal to make the suffrage
movement partisan annex of
the republican campaign was
further emphasized by DR.. Anna
Howard Shaw, "the sage of suf-
frage,' in an interview pub
lished in the Philadelphia Press.
a staunch republican organ.
1.-THE president in his speech
to the convention promised all
he could carry out" said DR..
Shaw. "If he had promised :
more we would have known
that he could not carry it out.
Not the republicans alone, nor
the democrats alone, can bring
: suffrage. If it could be done
that way ! would favor it. But
it can't. We must get enough
democrats and Republicans toge-
ther to do it.''
Daily capital journal. (Salem, Oregon) 1903-1919, 1916-10-14

''Drink to me only with thine eyesn
quoted the romantic maiden. can
right. Here's looking at you," replied
the practical young man.
Daily capital journal. (Salem, Oregon) 1903-1919, 1916-10-14

ION your way!" he
growls at me. "Th'
conifers for you!"
About that time,
Jack has quit his
fire 8 h pure water
stunt and IL closing
In on me. There's
a mix. and &c k
an me finds our
selves tangled on the
Daily capital journal. (Salem, Oregon) 1903-1919, 1916-10-14

Secretary, Oregon State Board of
Control Oct. 10-l4.17-sl
The Irish standard., 1916-12-02
Why Catholics Make an
Offering For Masses

"Why are Catholics obliged to make
an Offering for Masses? Since so many
Catholics insist that we have to pay
for them, would it not be better not
to have any money in connection with
them?" asks a correspondent of the
editor of Truth. The editor gives the
following answer:
We are not obliged to have the
Masses said, nor is the priest obliged
to say them; at least he is not Obliged
to say them for our intention. The
priest is obliged to give the people the
opportunity Of attending Mass on Sun
days and holy days of obligation. He
| feels it to be his duty also, his priestly
duty, to say Mass every day, in so far
as may be possible, and to say Mass
at an hour convenient for some peo-
pie to attend. His own love and devo-
ton to the Blessed Sacrament are
sufficient reasons why he will try to
be always faithful to the daily Mass.
The love and devotion of the pious
members of the congregation who can
find the leisure moments for attend.
ing daily Mass will be added to his
own priestly motives. But even when
his piety and devotion lead him to say
Mass, there is nothing to bind him to
the saying of that Mass for this or
that particular person. So someone
asks him to "say Mass tomorrow for
my Intention" and offers him no nay
because no pay can be given for spir-
itual things or benefits, but what the
Church calls an aims. If he accepts
this, then he is obliged to offer a Mass
for the person or for the intention of
the person who makes the Offering.
1t might be better to have no money
offered at the celebration of Mass,
at baptism, or at marriage, but
what may be better in theory is not
always better in practice. There is,
on the other hand, disposition
amongst most Catholics to make an
Offering to the priest on these occa-
sions. But all should understand and
know that in case of poverty, no one
need be deprived of the Sacramento,
nor in the case Of death, need poor
person be without Mass.
Sometimes people imagine that the
money is necessary, that the priest
will do nothing without it. And this
is very unjust to the priest. They OK.
pect that those who can shall make
the recognized offering, but they en-
pect, too, to make allowances for
those in need. And no one should
ever hesitate to ask for the benefits
OF religion, no matter in how destitute
circumstances he may be. That
abuses have crept into even sacred
matters is true, but these abuses have
never had the sanction of the Church.
The Irish standard., 1916-12-02
Catholic Church
Awarded Seven
chapIains in Army

The statement that there is such a
large percentage Of Catholics among
the enlisted personnel of the Army
and Navy Of the United States, has
caused surprise in certain quarters
but the explanation for this is to be
found in some statistics recently pub.
lished, concerning the sections of the
country which furnished the soldiers
for the Mexican border at the recent
mobilization. 1t has been officially
stated that Massachusetts, New York
and Illinois furnished forty per cent
of the troops who responded to the
call of the President when danger
seemed imminent. 1t is perfectly
evident that these three states are
the large Catholic centers OF our
country-hence the large proportion
Of Catholics among the volunteers
found on the border. 1t is reasonable
to suppose that the bulk of the regu-
lar Army is recruited from the same
sections, which will account for the
large proportion of Catholics in the
regular Army. This fact demonstrates
the need of Catholic Chaplains in
both arms of the service.
In the distribution of the new Chan.
laincies, created under the recent law,
the Catholic Church has been award.
ed seven, and Rev. L. J. O'Hern, G. s.
p, who represents the Catholic Her.
archy in these appointments, is en-.
gagged at present in securing suitable
candidates for this important work.
While it is true that there is not
so large a proportion Of Catholic off,
GERS in either Army or Navy, as
amongst the enlisted men, this differ
ence can be accounted for in the fact
that the officers are mainly recruited
from West Point and Annapolis-the
appointments coming from all sections
OF the country, and while, therefore,
the country at large is equally repre-.
scented from West Point and Annapolis.
the recruiting is not so equally dis
tributed, for many Congressional
district with representatives in both
the big training schools, perhaps never
furnished man in the ranks,
The Irish standard., 1916-12-02
SISTERS OF PARIS CARE FOR SIX
THOUSAND WOUNDED.

The wounded soldiers in France
seem in special manner to belong to
the clergy and the Sisters. In Paris
alone and it's suburbs 955 beds have
been placed at the disposal of the
wounded in II Catholic hospitals, 437
beds in 8 sanitariums, 2,189 beds in
20 educational establishments, 954
beds in IS settlements, and 1858 beds
in 81 religious communities. In all
1888 beds have been set aside for
the wounded soldiers by Catholic in
situations in the Diocese of Paris, and
out of 1900 beds which the three
societies of the Red Cross have in
Paris and the suburbs, 5000 are cared
for by religious.
The Irish standard., 1916-12-02
The irish Standard Preferred Parish Trading List

n Bust
Traden
Paper -~ -S"">
The Irish standard., 1916-12-02
WILL BRING ORPHANS OVER.
Priest Sails to Get Three Hundred
BeIuian Children,

Priest Sails to Get Three Hundred
Belgian Children.
The Rev. Father John B. Deville,
American delegate in Belgium for the
Belgian-American Alliance in Chicago,
sailed on October 81 on the steamship
Ryndam for Belgium to arrange for
the sending here of 800 Belgian boys
and girls under fifteen years of age
and orphaned by the war, who are to
be cared for by American relatives.
He carried with him more than
1900 letters and a considerable sum
of money for war-stricken relatives
sent by Belgians in the United States
and Canada.
Father Deville said that since the
war began his organization had ar
ranged for transportation of more
than 800 Belgians to the United
States.
The Irish standard., 1916-12-02
ASQUiTH REFUSED REQUEST FOR
Refinement OF SINN
FElNERS.

Lawrence Ginnell, Nationalist men,
Der of parliament for West Meath,
asked Premier Asquith, in the house
of commons, recently, whether the
British government could accede to
the desires of the Irish people of all
classes and allow the bodies of men
executed last May at the time of the
Dublin revolt to be removed from
the places in which they now lie and
be buried in consecrated ground.
Premier Asquith said the government
was unable to accede to the request.