davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Ward County independent. [volume] (Minot, Ward County, N.D.) 1902-1965, 1916-08-03
- The -
Scrap Book
Located Himself.

A wild shout and rush Of men
There had been an accident. Patrick
4illigan, one Of the gang of mine
shaft sinkers, had fallen downtown.
At first his mates thought it was all
up with Pat but faint yell told them
otherwise. Peering down the shaft
they saw Pat lying precariously on a
beam about third Of the way down.
And from this place he directed his
VWn rescue rssss Lea. ga rs
But Just as they We're lowering ropes
Pat slipped down another twenty feet.
30 they patiently began again, this
time feeling sure Of success. The rope
was almost in his hand when, in his
excitement, he lurched forward and
crashed away into the darkness below
White of face, the foreman leaned
over the shaft.
."Pat!" he shouted. Il say. Pat"
From the unseen depths came
faint reply of "Hurroo,"
"Are We hurt, Pate" -....sr,a'-
II am not!'' ---.-s-.--.7'
where are We. man."
Where am I? Glory be to Moses,
I'm on the bottom at last"-Exchange.
The Ward County independent. [volume] (Minot, Ward County, N.D.) 1902-1965, 1916-08-03
Needn't Go Higher.

A draw wing master, who had been
worrying a pupil with contemptuous
remarks as to his want Of skill in the
use of the pencil, ended by saying:
"If you were to draw me. for exam
pie, tell me what part you would draw
first?''
The pupil. with a significant mean
ing in his eye, looked up into his mas
ter's face and quietly said:
"Your neck, sir."-London Tit-Bits.
The Ward County independent. [volume] (Minot, Ward County, N.D.) 1902-1965, 1916-08-03

way to ask you,
rs my olde 8 /
friend, to be one
of my brid e g.
maids"
Bride s maids!
II Ow lovely! I
did not know you
W ere engaged"
replied Grace.
cts s u d d e n,
very sudden. But
he's awfully in
love and is just
too lovely to live.
win you act?"
"Of course I'll
act! l will be
charmed! B u t."
moving forward
and peak in g
In an undertone,
do come around
thu nrupN M u~rH
The Ward County independent. [volume] (Minot, Ward County, N.D.) 1902-1965, 1916-08-03
Points on Sparkling.

A foreign born professor Of physics
in western college was lecturing to a
class Of young men and light hearted
'co-eds." With reference to an cleo
trical apparatus before him he ex-
planned in the gravest manner pos
sible:
"You see, when keep desc two met
al points far apart de electric spark
makes a great noise, but not 80 when
bring dem closer togedder. So, ladies
and gentlemen, observe de general
rule: De report is never SO great when
de sparkin' distance Is short"
The Ward County independent. [volume] (Minot, Ward County, N.D.) 1902-1965, 1916-08-03
Don't Worry.

When things go contrary, as often they DO,
And fortune seems burdened with spite
Don't give way to grieving all dismal and
That never set anything right
But cheerfully face what the day may
reveal,
Make the best Of whatever befall
Since the more that you worry the worse
you must feel,
Why waste time in worry at all?
We all have our troubles, some more and
some less,
And this is the knowledge we gain
It's work and brave heart that tighten
the stress
OF life's share Of sorrow and pain.
Then face with this knowledge Fate's
cruelest deal.
Too plucky to faint or to fall
Since the more that you worry the worse
you must feel,
Is it wisdom to worry at all:
The Ward County independent. [volume] (Minot, Ward County, N.D.) 1902-1965, 1916-08-03
Wanted . Sleeper.

A certain physician sat in q box at:
the theater the other night. 1t hap
pened that he was the first man to.
take his seat in that particular box.
The next man ushered in had been hit
ting just few Of the more elevated
points in the highway prior to coming
to the theater.
Am intruding?" he inquired ever
so politely OF the doctor. Have you
this section engaged all for yourselfl''
mo. | haven't got it engaged all for
myself. Sit down." replied the doctor
brusquely. for he didn't want to en-
courage the stranger to carry on any
extended conversation.
"All right. them" replied the stran-
ger. III you haven't got the whole Sec
ton III tell the porter to 60 ahead and.
let down the upper berth Washing
ton Star.
The Ward County independent. [volume] (Minot, Ward County, N.D.) 1902-1965, 1916-08-03
Look the pjoht Way,


It's all in the way that you look at the
world,
It's all in the way that you do things:
With laughter or sorrow your lips may be
cUrled.
But it's ell in the way that you view
things.
Yes it's all in the way that you journey
along
That makes life plague or pleasure,
The mind is the fountain Of wailing or
song,
And man is the judge of the measure.
We can make our own sunshine and make
our own nlirth.
We can add to our trouble by moping:
We can make grim graveyard of this
glad old earth
BY giving up loving and hoping.
For it's all in the way that we look at the
world,
Yes it's all in the way that we view
things.
With sorrow or laughter our lips may be
curled.
For it's all In the way that we do
things.
The Ward County independent. [volume] (Minot, Ward County, N.D.) 1902-1965, 1916-08-03

tell me all about it. Here comes that
odious, idiotic, irrepressible donkey,
Jim Berton. He's grinning as though
he meant to stop, and don't want to
meet him. don't care to be seen talk
ing to him. -
Jim Berton! He's the man I'm 70.
ing to marry"'-New York Globe,
The Ward County independent. [volume] (Minot, Ward County, N.D.) 1902-1965, 1916-08-03
A Quaker Rebuke,

An elderly Quaker went into a book
store and an impertinent salesman,
wishing to have joke at his expense,
said to him:
You are from the country, aren't
you?
YES" quietly answered the Quaker.
"Then, here's just the thing for
you,' said the clerk, holding up book.
What is it?' asked the Quaker.
It's an essay on the rearing of
calves"
Friend" said the Quaker, thou
hadst better present that to thy moth.
err"
The Ward County independent. [volume] (Minot, Ward County, N.D.) 1902-1965, 1916-08-03
Luxury Of Voc.


Mandy had ''dished up my lonesome
lunch, but still she fingered near.
"Well, Mandy, what is it?'' l asked,
recognizing the symptoms.
She giggled consciously. please,
Miss Ethel, could yo' lend me par
red stockin's:'
Red stockings, Mandy? Are you
going to a party?'
She became impressively solemn at
once. "Oh, no, miss. Abs gwine to a
fun'al.''
But, Mandy, red stockings at fu-
neral! Everybody always wears black
at funerals ..
"Yes'm, All knows, miss"-she hest
tated-"but, yo' see, All expects to
PROSTATE mahself on de grave"-New
York Post.
Romance of the Elevator.
The elevator waited.
And bankers and stenOgraphers and
statesmen and agents.
The starter snapped his signal.
The doors began to close.
When a cherubic faced messenger
boy slipped in and faced the door.
He turned and looked us over.
With a childlike, questioning, re-
proachful stare.
Then politely DOTTED his number cap
and held it against his breast.
The women smiled
While painful bushes
Swept over the faces Of the men In
the ascending car
And one by one
The hats came off
Until every man in the elevator stood
sheepishly bareheaded.
Just then
A strange thing happened.
The little messenger boy, having
glanced into his cap,
Shouted. "Stop at
The twenty-thoid. will yerv'
And replaced his cap on his head at
a raking angle, whistling.
All he had done
Was to consult
The address on the telegram.-New
York Tribune.
The Ward County independent. [volume] (Minot, Ward County, N.D.) 1902-1965, 1916-08-03
Mothers Work,

Father, you always seem to be in a
better humor when you come home at
night than when you 60 away in the
morning." said the daughter.
"Of course" replied the parent; you
see l have some money in my pocket
when I come home. "-Yonkers States
man.
The Ward County independent. [volume] (Minot, Ward County, N.D.) 1902-1965, 1916-08-03
The
Scrap Book
Making Il Pleasant.

Two girl friends met in the street
and stopped to shake hands.
$50 glad to see you, Grace" said he
TAILOR made Alice. II was just on my
The Ward County independent. [volume] (Minot, Ward County, N.D.) 1902-1965, 1916-08-03
A Guilty Conscience.

A young fellow who was the crack
Splinter of his town-somewhere In
the south-was unfortunate enough to
have a very dilatory laundress. One
evening. when he was out for
practice run in his rather airy and alb
breviated track costume, he CHANGED
to dash past the house Of that dusky
lady. who at the time was a couple
of weeks in arrears with his washing.
He had scarcely reached home again
when the bell rang furiously and an
excited voice was waited in from the
porch:
Fob de Lawd's sake. won't you all
tell Marse Bob please not to 80 out no
mob till kin git his clo'es round to
him "-Harper's Magazine
The Ward County independent. [volume] (Minot, Ward County, N.D.) 1902-1965, 1916-08-03
Italian Humor.

Italian Humor.
The Domenica dell COrriere is re-
sponsible for the following anecdote:
A dull looking married couple were
travelling in a second class compart-
ment on the Berlin to Milan line. Said
the husband: "My dear, l will ask
you a riddle to make the time pass.
What are those two black shining
things which are put on when it rains?'
Il do not know" said the wife.
'"Then ! will tell you. A pair Of
goloshes."
She-Ah. ah. ah! Yes, Of course.
He-I will ask you another riddle
What are those four things, black,
black, and very shining, which arc
put on when it rains?
She-Um, UNI! don't know
Hell win tell you. Two pairs Of
goloshes.
She-Ah, ali, ah! Just so, Of course.
He-And now here is third riddle
for you. What is that thing which
has four legs and tail. which comes
running to meet you and makes
bow. WOW, WOW?
She-Ah, ali! | know,this time Three
pairs of goloshes.
The Ward County independent. [volume] (Minot, Ward County, N.D.) 1902-1965, 1916-08-03
The Ee,,:x nf eAa.ai

The Fruit Of Search.
'Smifkins went hunting for a peach
| for q wife" T. .@
well. what happened?'
HE picked lemon
American. Il
The Ward County independent. [volume] (Minot, Ward County, N.D.) 1902-1965, 1916-08-03

Subscribe for the Ward County In
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The Ward County independent. [volume] (Minot, Ward County, N.D.) 1902-1965, 1916-08-03

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The Ward County independent. [volume] (Minot, Ward County, N.D.) 1902-1965, 1916-08-03

Where am I? Glory be to Moses,
I'm on the bottom at lastw-Exchange.
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1916-09-25
GRAND CIRCUIT TO
RESUME AT COLUMBUS

COLUMBUS, o., Sept 25.-Grand
circuit racing will be resumed on
the Columbus track Monday with a
program of four events. The pT-in-
cipal one is the chamber OF COM
merce $4,000 stake for 200 trotters,
with Mabel Trask, Sister Strong,
The Emo, Bacelli, Vance. Harry ].
:, bennington. Esperanza and Nc
Closkey listed as starters. For the
Devereaux stake OF $4,000 for 2:15
trotters, the five starters wiH be
Early Don, Brisca. Brescia, Grand
Chimes and Lu Princeton.
Originally. Mondays program
called for but the 2:15 class pace
Twenty starters were found in read
mess for IT. Therefore. the event
was ordered divided and two fields
of ten made up. For each OF these
split races. the purse will be $500.
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1916-09-25
PIN KNIGHTS OUT
AF TER NE W MARKS
MueSSeIS Start Early by Get
ting 1904 For One Game.
Sharkey Gets 63l.

Although the bowling season is
scarcely started the boys are already
attacking the pins in record break
ing style. This is especially true or
the players in the United and Cen
trail leagues. The Muessels, rolling
in the latter organization hung up
a mark OF 1904. and, this with TO
score in il. However, the record
cannot hope to stand as but four
men took part in the play, taking
the average for the absent players
score.
Louie Barth was high in the big
attack with 254. while Spaeth and
Sharkey contributed 231 and 223
respectively. AS Abraham was but
IT'S il save the team an average OF
221. Ii was very unfortunate that
the otner man was absent for with
a fairly sood score it would not have
been q very difficult task to surpass
the local alley record for single
game, which is now held by the
Conservative Life Insurance CO.
team with a mark of 1889.
Sharkey Gets 6S1.
There were some splendid indi-
viduaI efforts during league play in
which Sharkey. anchor for the
Muessels gathered 631 for the
series. Spaeth, his team mate, gave
him a good ride with go. "Sheak
EN-" Hager, captain of the Eagles.
showed 615 for his team in the Unit
ed league, but in spite of his efforts
the squad lost the odd game to the
Schafer & Platners. The high in
6ividual game was cashed by Louie
Barth for the Muessels going 254.
Already a number of tight races
are in progress in the various
leagues. However. that Of the
period, while in most cases that OF
the handicap leagues professions
prevail. In most instances Mr..
Handicap has not found his bear
ings. due because of the many new
aspirants for honOrs who have, not
become thoroughly settled to an es-
tablished basis.
In the City league five clubs are
on even terms and are tied for first
place. In the Central league three
of the six clubs are each entitled to
first place, while in the United
league, which is also a six-club or
ganization. two teams lead, while
the next three clubs are but one
game behind. Among the handicap
leagues the Printers and Watch Co.
leagues are the most concentrated.
This uek will nroha bIv SOC the
reorganization of the Ladies league,
which holds forth at the Orpheum
Alleys each Wednesday.
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1916-09-25
HARPER To GIVE
ROUGH STUFF
NJ. D. Coach Declares Hard
Work Needed For
Case Game.

With the opening game OF the sea
son scheduled for saturday. Coach
Harper viii today begin a series Of
strenuous daily srinds on Cartier
neid in order TO put his men in shape
Tor the hard battle with Case.
Two and possibly three scrim
images viii be on the boards this
week, Harper announced al the con-
ciusion OF Saturday practice. W bile
a humber OF the squad members are
suffering from bruises and knocks as
a result OF the two scrimmages last
week. the coach declares that the
men need considerable more rough
stuff before they viii be ready to
line up against the Case aggrega-
ton.
Case II Strong.
Case comes here with a strong
reputation For years the Notre
Dame opponents have FLASHED with
Michigan and each game has re-
suited IN a hard battle. This year
there are Is men left over from the
squad Of last season and indications
point to one Of the strongest teams
~ history
Just now the N0tre Dame varsity
Will line up in Saturdays game is
as Yet a problem. The backheld is
almost a certainty. Capt. COfall and
Bergman will be ut the halves AMI
5chn Miller will probably De able
u start the game AT fullback. II is
yet a question whether jim Pnelan
mill into EsaFrrrrIasgfer f~4rua All
depends on his condition this week.
II Phelan IS unable to start, Grant
or Dorais will be at quarterback.
Battle For Tackle job.
Baujan and Whippie lOOk like the
end choice. If CoughHn keeps up
the pace. ne showed in saturday
scrimmage, he appears certainty
10 start at left tackle. But McIner-
ny will have to hump TO keep Phil
bin from jumping into right tackle.
Both men have been showing great
fern and there will undoubtedly be
"a desperate struggle for the job
Bachman and decree or Frantz look
like the guard choices 10 start the
,pening battle.
Rydzewsi at present has the
bulge on the center position, but
Nadigan, a last years freshman.
showed so well in Saturdays scrim-
mage that the big veteran will have
TO struggle hard to hold onto his
Job.
Next Saturdays game will be
played on the new football field on
Cartier field. The new gridiron is
enclosed 5y the quarter mile cinder
track. While work has been going
on in putting the field in shape and
an erecting new fences. the old var
sity playing field has been laid out
at a different angle than heretofore
and men have been participating
on it. The new football lot is where
the old baseball playing field was
Formerly located but under the
plans for Tearranging Cartier field.
The diamond will be placed in the
north end OF the lot
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1916-09-25
OPEN WITH VICTORY

The j. Szigety football team
started out its schedule yesterday
afternoon BY winning from the q.
Nargo aggregation ny q 30 TO o score
the game being PLAYED on the J. -.
oliver heid. Klysz. Kubiak. ana
Jagia of the winners featured the
game with their playing. The Szi-
eety's challenge any team in the
city that averages 40 pounds. For
games write 20 p LANCER. EOS X
Chaplin ST. or call Home phone --IS
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1916-09-25
American League
\ x X X X X X X x X X x * r. Il
YESTERDAYS SCORES :
X X \; X X !; X X X X X * X X X
AMERICAN LEAGUE

New York 100 600 O0O-1 3
Chicago 100 100 OO*-2
CullOp. Russell and Walters; Will
hams and Lynn.
Boston 900 200 OO1-3
Cleveland 1000 O4O 01'-5 L
Leonard and Carrigan, Thomas:
BOehling. Bagby and O'Neill.
Philadelphia .O01 600 100 Q
st. Louis 200 600 600 o
SeibOld and Haley; Sisler and
Hartley, Hale.
Philadelphia 100 600 O1O-2 8 /
St Louis 200 01O OOF-S I
Parnham and Picinich; KOob and
Hartley
Washington 100 02O 300 10 ,
Detroit ....121 O1O 1OF-6 Il 0
Johnson and Henry. Williams.
Charity; Ehmke and Stannage.
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1916-09-25
GAMES THIS WEEK.
MONDAY.

GAMES THIS WEEK.
MONDAY
Electric League.
/. x N. No I vs.. 7. a VI. No.
I. & NJ. No. Va. I. Il VI. No. 2
l. A NJ. No. > IS. Home Telephone
Bel No. ] vs.. Rsll No. -
Watch Company League.
Machine shop IS. Timing.
Jeweing ~. Finishing
Flat Steel VS. DamaSkeening
...... TUESDAY. o. ........
Federal League
Tails ". Antlers.
Elks IS. Stays
Orphans rs. lawns
Lumber League.
Pines vs. Red Gums.
oaks ~. Naples.
MANUFACTURERS LEAGUE.
StephenSOnS vs.. Studebakers
Lathe Works IS. divers
+. & VI. Range ~ Watch Co.
Printer League.
News-Times vs. Neutrals.
Ind Engraving Co. ". Hibberds
So. Bend Eng Co rs Hardys.
Peerless Press W TribuneS.
WEDNESDAY.
Bills - Bards
Hoofs vs.. Bones.
City League.
OrpheumS - Bucktails
Watch Co. rs. Hullie 4 Mike
Tigers W. StudehakerS
q. ~ Z. ~ Jimmy < Goats
PiOw Co. League.
Office rs. shipping.
Machine shop VS.. Foundry
THU RSDAN-
Bankers League.
First National =. Citizens National
50 Bend National ~. Merchants Natl
st. Joe Savings vs. CuiOn Trust-Chapin
American Trust VS.. Morris Plan.
Antlers League.
Charms Is. Teeth.
TylerS IS Horns
oliver League.
Purchasing -. Cost
Bookkeeping vs. Production
Stock IS Forge
Billing vs.. Sales
Accounting vs. Foundry.
Wood Patterns Va Designing
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1916-09-25
WIN POLO TITLE.

PHILADELPHIA. Pa. Sept. 49,
The Eastern circuit polo team com
posed OF New York pla-Crs. by de-
feating the Southeastern circuit
team made up of Philadelphians
won the national championship Sat
JIday AT the Philadelphia Country
ciuh hy the score OF l. goals 70
I2L
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1916-09-25
INDIANA IN POOR WAY
Capt. Mcintosh May b. out of Game
For Season.
-ternaIi0n1I News Service

international News Service:
BLOOMINGTON, Ind. sept 30.
The football situation az the start
OF the second week at Indiana uni
Versity is anything bat cheerful
Capt. Mcintosh may be out OF the
game for the season because of
IOod-poisouing. Erehart star
half-back. will not be able TO report
for another week. by which time
ths university guardsmeu with the
Indiana troops probably viii he
mustered out. The Depauw game
= Saturday.
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1916-09-25
Red S0x Drop Game, White Sox Win and Gain Game
THE REMNANT CHASE

CHICAGO, sept 25.-Boston lost
ground Sunday in the American
league race by dropping a game 20
Cleveland while Chicago and De-
troit won. The champions are now
two and a half games ahead OF Chi
cago and three games ahead of De
troit. Boston still has eight games
TO play, Chicago live and Detroit q.
Standing:
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1916-09-25
RACINE GETS BOXING
Two Bouts Scheduled POr Wisconsin
City Tonight.

International News Service
RACINE. Wis. sept. 25.-ROxinc
VIII make its bow here tonight
when Matty McCue and Sunburst
Dolan meet in 4 scheduled To-
round bout at 1873 pounds. Spike
Kelly and Anton the Greek. weller
weights will furnish the other half
Of the wiudup for 10 rounds.
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1916-09-25
STILL IN
REMNANT BATTLE
Alexander Expected to be
Called On Every Other
Day if Necessary.
BY Prank &. sienkc.

international News Service:
NEW YORK. Sept. 25.-Are those
pherocious. phearless Phillies going
70 phoil the plans Of one G. Hercules
Ebbets to give a world series party
over in the teeming wilds Of
Brooklyn?
Just when everybody-including
Z. Hercules-had decided that the
Dodgers would be certain perform
ers in the blue ribbon baseball skit
OF 1915. a cable or something slip
ped. And now the Dodgers have
been dragged TO within one and one
nalf games Of the never-say-di
Phillies
can you blame the Dodgers and
their owners for feeling a bit shiv
cry in the region of their spinal
column today? or can you do any
thing but approve the re-awakened
enthusiasm over in Quakertown
The Brooklynites have the edge"
but they aren't quite in"
Phillies Can't Fight.
They are game lighters. over
there in Philadelphia; they don't
know what it is 10 be beaten. Time
and again this year they have seem
ed to be out Of the race. Yet al
ways in their plodding. but steady
way. they have come on again and
crept 70 within striking distance Of
the flag.
l. is such "A team that the Dodgers
now must beat in this final rush to-
ward the finish line-the toughest
kind Of foe extant The Ebbets
crowd has a job carried out for il
from now on, because the Phillies
are fielding beautifully and their
sluggers suddenly have returned to
the land OF swat
If Rixey can come back" or il
Demaree Or Mayer jump into the
pitching breach in these final days
and help Alexander throw back the
onrushing hordes. victory may yet
go TO the Quakers. The elongated
southpaw pitched wonderfully well
up 10 three weeks ago. Since then
he has been floundering. If he can
get back into stride again-and
immediately-the Phillies. not the
Dodgers. will be the defenders of
NiAt llOiAoA anu 6AOA VI AAlt wen
known National league.
Pat Moran's stunt Saturday Of
permitting Alexander TO work in a
ouble-header seems to prove that
at least he is going to play his trump
card-that he will work Alexander
every other day, If necessary. from
now until the nag is clinched. or
! hOpelessly lost. But he must have
at least one more pitcher to work
Ton those alternate days; one more
HEAVIER who can go in-and win
Can RiXey do il? or Demaree? or
will it be Mayer, the erratic, or
Bender. the old and withered. but
ever brainy Indian?
VIII that three-gam series which
the Phillies are to play in Brooklyn
on Thursday. Friday and Saturday
of this week decide the pennant?
or will the issue remain in doubt
until the last game OF the season
has been played?
Tough GOing Ahead.
The schedule for both clubs fol-
lows:
Dodgers Cto play ~ At home
VS.. Chicago four; VS.. Philadelphia
three; Va. New York four. Abroad,
none.
Phillies Ito play IL At home
rs. Cincinnati two; Us. Boston six
Abroad-At Brooklyn, three.
Which is the tougher assignment?
For the Phillies to play the wob-
bling Braves. or for the Dodgers to
tackle the ''19 straight" Giants?
The answer may decide the pen
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1916-09-25
u NEGRo NnNsTREL nAYs.

Farmer-Think Of IT, The num-
Der OF people nowadays who are
done by the middleman'
Grocer-Rut Just think back
about so years.
Farmer-AS 10 what.
Grocer-tiow they used 10 6c
done by the end man
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1916-09-25
BROOIE is DUE TODAY
Football Practice Begins With =
Bang at Chicago.

International News Service:
CHICAGO. Sept. 25.-The second
week Of football practice at Stagg
field viii begin with a bang today.
when the first real scrimmage play
will be undertaken. Brodie. the
husky maroon linesman. is expected
TO report today. The real problem
for Coach Stagg is filling the end
positions