davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1916-03-09
VOLUNTEER PLAN CANNOT
DEFEND THIS COUNTRY
Grave Danger Exists that When
the Present War Is Over the
Administrations Proposed Sys-
tern Mould Break Down-Case
of Patriotism Mixed with Poll
itics.
(From the Spokane Spokesman
Review

secretary Garrison of the war
department., though frankly can
did in admission that the success
of his continental army plan de-
ponds to considerable extent
upon cooperation with the gov
eminent by the employers of the
country's young men, yet is hope
full that q few prompt responses
prcsage a widespread volunteer
spirit in the land.
Approving letters have come
from number of employers and
''at least one has expressed will
lingness to grant its men leave on
fill pay for service in the pro-
posed organization.
That seems poor foundation
whcreon to build the country's
defense. A few approving letters
nlt Of the hundreds of thousands
nf employers in the United States
is hardly the proverbial drop in
tlir bucket.
'::' even We're it very different
= even though thousands of en-
rloNers were acclaiming their CO.
operation in the plants success
N,.,lG he uncertain.
A. the moment the public is
deeply moved by the need of pre-
parcdncss and defense. IL looks
cut upon an cmbattled world. 1t
has seen the fading, as fades a
str,.scr cloud, of the ill-built
h"l.,, hat wars had ceased; that
:..lc n.ilennium had dawned and
i';,t'c', and moderation sup
planted, at last, the age old strug-
Gle for national expension and
national gain; that greed of power
and aggression of might had van
ished as in a night, and that in
the imagined dawn Of different
day this nation beneath the stars
and stripes might safely leave the
welfare and independence of it's
i.00,O00,000 souls to alien sense
Of justice and alien love of peace.
Voice Of the Paoif1st.
Contemplating all the strife and
fury and bitterness across the
seas, in the very lands where civ
ilization was Graded 5000 years
ago, this nation has taken such
quick alarm as community
takes after disastrous fire or
shocking loss of life by accident.
But with the return of peace over
the sea these vivid impressions
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1916-03-09
circumspectlon.

My boy" said the editor of the
Billsville Bugle TO the new re-
porter, you lack caution. You
must learn not to state things as
facts until they are proved facts
otherwise you are very apt to
get us into libel suits. Do not
say the cashier who stole the
tunds;' say the cashier who is al
legged to have stolen the funds
That's all now, and-ah-turn
in a stickful about that Second
w:.rG social last night. /"
Owing to an influx of visitors it
was late in the afternoon before
the genial editor of the Bugle
caught a glimpse of the great
family sheet. Half way down the
social column his eyes hit on the
following paragraph: ut is ru-
mored that a card party was given
last evening to a number of re-
puted ladies of the Second ward.
Mrs. Smith, gossip says, was the
hostess, and the festivities are re-
ported to have continued until
1880 in the evening. tits alleged
that the affair was a social func-
ton given to the ladies of the Sec
ond Ward Cinch club, and that,
with the exception of Mrs. James
Bilwiliger, who says she comes
from Leavits junction, none but
members were present. The re-
puted hostess insists that coffee
and waters alone were served as
refreshments. The Smith woman
claims to be the wife of John
Smith, the so-called Honest Shoe
Man of 315 East State street. y
+ Shortly afterward q whjrling
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1916-03-09
out Of the Raoe.

When one wakes up with stiff
back, pains in muscles, aches in
joints, or rheumatic twinges, he
cannot do his best. If you feel
out of the race, tired, languid or
have symptoms of kidney trouble
act promptly. Foley Kidney Pills
help the kidneys get rid of poison
GUS waste matter that causes
trouble. mao
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1916-03-09
An ideal Spring Laxative.

A good and time-tried remedy
is DIR. Kings New Life pills. The
first dose will move the sluggish
bowels, stimulate the liver and
clear the system of waste and
blood impurities. You owe it to
yourself to clear the system of
body poisons. accumu' ated dur
ing the winter. DR.. Kings New
Life Pills will do it. Csc at your
druggist. m3O
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1916-03-09
CITRoI.lLxl,.
OlTnO Ak
oltrolas.

Best thing for constipation.
sour stomach, lazy liver and slug
gish bowels. Stops a sick head
ache almost at once. Gives a most
thorough and satisfactory flush
ing-no pain, no nausea. Keeps
your system cleansed, sweet and
wholesome. Ask for Citrolax.
Sold everywhere. mao
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1916-03-09
HAS EIaht children.

Mrs. P. Rehkamp, 24O4 Herman
street, Covington, KY, writes: II
have been using Foley's Honey
and Tar for nearly two years and
can find no better cough syrup.
j have eight children and give it.
to all Of them. They were sub
ject to Group from babies on" II
IL !, safe and reliable medicine.
Sold everywhere. mao
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1916-03-09

as Great Britain, rejecting the
earnest pleas of Lord Roberts and
other far-seeing patriots, chung
to the volunteer system in time
of peace, dreds to cast it off in
time of war, hesitates, falters and
delays the imperatively demanded
change until it begins to look as
though it had hesitated too long.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1916-03-09
Cannot Praise Them Enough.
Many sick and tired women

Many SICK and tired women,
with aches and pains, sore mus
cles and stiff joints, do not know
that their kidneys are out of or
der. Mrs. A. G.. Wells, box 90,
route 5, Rocky Mount, N. c.,
writes: II am taking Foley Kid
ney Pills and cannot praise them
enough for the wonderful benefit
I derived in such afshort while"
Sold everywhere. m30
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1916-03-09

mass claiming to Sc q reporter
on the Bugle, flew aiten feet into
the street and landed with what
bystanders assert was q dull, sick
ening thud Puck.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1916-03-09

trial Ms sst Tor THURSDAY xpofxi- y
ing and on account Of tho DliAd
Man being unable to see the court
appointed for him an interpreter
ID the person Of Prof Sap Sprad-
len in Identifying the defendant.
Luke Mathewsia has been sum-
moned to Bounding Billows to
serve on q jury in the trial Of .
fellow that broke into the post
office. The officer serving the
papers is getting up a republican
jury and the defendant will with
out doubt be found not guilty on
account Of the postoffice being In
the hands of the democrats.
Raj Barlow, our we'll known fid-
dler, has concluded to settle down
and will make an endeavor to save
/ up some money between now and
summer. He will begin economic
ing by using only two strings on
his fiddle when he plays without /
pay.
The editor of the Tickville Tid-
lings says he has made so many
enemies here of late that he Is
about ready to go to Florida.
The postoffice will remain open
lat night now until Poke Eazley
lgets through with the telling Of a
joke he begun some time last
week.
Ellick Hellwanger heard Of
marriageable widow with three
gentle children and COW, living
over near Thunderation, but after
a visit to that place he decided to-
take only the COW.
Friday morning the Deputy
Constable arrested a fellow wear
ling blue pants on charge of hav-
ing stolen calf from man near
lBounding Billows. Before the.
man had been in Jail long the
Ijailer got up conversation with
him, and finding him to be a sec
fond cousin of his wife he was
turned loose on habeas corpus
proceedings.
| The Old Nliser.
/ Yam Sims has been named as
la committee on ways and means
of finding out more about the past
life of the Old Miser, so that he,
may be more thoroughly dis
lcussed at the postoffice and other
places. About all that is known
of the Old Miser is that he moved
into our midst few summers
tago during the blackberry sea-
son. He is reported to have been
born north of Buzzard Knob.
Being of a suspicious nature he
occupies a house on Musket
Ridge, which is higher than the
surrounding creek bottoms and
| from his window he can watch
everybody round about. He
changes places of residence very
loften on account of the uneasi-.
Iness he has felt since he caught
Raj Barlow peeping. at him.
Through a fence crack while lie
vas counting his money that he
had buried. The Old Miser came
into our midst unsolicited by the
Hogwallow Improvement society.
By attending strictly to his own
business he has become the most
unpopular citizen Of this section.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1916-03-09

Sim Flinders was in tolls again
this week, but by agreeing to
plead guilty to the charge he was
allowed to go free. He was ar
rested Tuesday morning on q
charge of having stolen the only
mule the Blind Man had. The
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1916-03-09

When spring gets under full
headway and Poke Eazley can
move his chair out on the front
porch at the postoffice the POST
master announces that he will
have much more room inside.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1916-03-09
The Old Miser on Musket Ridge
stuck his head out of the house
for a few minutes yesterday, but
slammed the door when he saw
Ellick Hellwanger coming.

1t is more difficult to write q
thing than it is to get up and
speak it. The public speaker does
not have to handle his comas and
semi-comas; neither does he have
to make paragraphs in his talk,
unless it is at that point where
he stops to take a drink of water
or TO suck a lemon. That is one
beauty about writing. You don't
necessarily have to such sour
old lemon.
Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1916-03-09

The Hog Ford church has new
member in the person of Fit
Smith. Another seat will not be
added, however, until it is seen
that he is going to stick.
Prof. Sap spradlen will deliver
an address on the South Pole al
the Wild Onion school house next
Saturday night. He will give a
full description of it, using the
blackboard to illustrate just how
tall it is and how it looks.
The Lakeland evening telegram. (Lakeland, Fla.) 1911-1922, 1916-03-22
LEECH ONCE HIGHLY PRICED
In Days That Have Long Gone BY the
Bloodsucker Was Considered
Of Value.

Our Observation-Disclosures regarded the
case of sickness. In the days when
blood-letting was popular panacea
the physician would have worried less
over the loss of his pill box than over
the death of this little worm. And
so long as blood-letting was popular
there was nothing to match the Elf
cheney of the leech.
Nature fitted him for the task to
which the physician adapted him.
Long before he was used on humans
the leech was performing operations
of his own on fish. frogs and other
neighbors of his in the mud and slime
at the bottom of his marsh home.
His operating tools consist of cup
like sucker at the end of his tail and
another at his mouth. Also at his
toothed jaws, which he works togeth-
er like saw. With these he cuts his
way through the scales of fish and
reaches the blood.
Then the leech's wormlike body be-
gins to expand. He has IL pairs of
sacks in his stomach, and he must fill
all these before he is satisfied. He
drinks until he is from two to three
times his natural size.
The leech IS liveliest in day time,
and at night he curls up for a nap.
When winter comes he buries himself
in the mud and waits for warmer
weather.
The Lakeland evening telegram. (Lakeland, Fla.) 1911-1922, 1916-03-22
The
Crystal
BY HAROLD CARTER

(Copyrlgnt, lslb. by W. u. Chapman.)
20 nonsense, Belle! don't believe
in that rubbish, and l wouldn't encour.
age superstition" said Lady Wheelock.
Belle Garrett turned reluctantly
away from the Arab with the crystal.
Seeing his hopes Of a customer dis
appearing, the fellow set up a wailing
chant that followed the ladies all
along the bazaar.
What is he saying?" Belle Garrett
asked the dragoman.
He wants you to look in his crys.
tai, lady," answered tho Egyptian.
He says that you will see something
very important
Again Belle Garrett hesitated, but
her companion was departing, and at
length she hurried after her, hearing
the Arabs cries still in her ears.
Did you ever look into one of those
crystals?" she asked her friend
"Never!" snapped Lady Wheelock
ITS all pack Of superstition and
humburg."
The dragoman smiled, and Belle
caught the look on his face. When
they were alone she asked him.
did you ever hear of anything
true being seen in a cystal?"
Yes, lady," he answered. Some.
The Lakeland evening telegram. (Lakeland, Fla.) 1911-1922, 1916-03-22

goose. 1t was pacing about in con-
sequential way as though aware Of the
extreme appreciation of its owner. 1t
was still honking, but low and Groom
ing, as though talking to itself
Daily report. all the same, old
Honolulu" approved Jared. II
wouldn't care to part with you"
Honolulu was bird Of passage.
strongly domiciled in an alien land.
A wild goose of superior endurance
and flying power, it had landed down
in the poultry yard among other more
civilized fellows about a year previ-
Gus. There was jagged wound in its
neck and as Jared came to examine
this, he found imbedded within it the
broken off stone head OF an arrow
1t was by pure accident that this
arrow had played an important part
I'm the fortunes of Jared. He CHANGED
to relate the incident to college pro-
fessor, whose fad was archaeology and
kindred sciences. The professor took
an interest in the circumstance. The
by an obscure tribe in the Sandwich
Islands. 1t was apparent, therefore,
that Honolulu had winged a memoir
able flight over land and sea thou
sands of miles, to domesticate itself
in an humble poultry yard in a strange
land. The incident of the long fight
{. the fowl was published in several
scientific journals, the name of Jared
was duly used, and he was pulled up
greatly when made a member of the
National pathological society.
That was not all. AZ he became
familiar with Honolulu and got to
studying the fowl, he discovered that
the intelligent bird was natural
weather glass. That "Honki Honki"
clarion note was Inverse, but depend
able. In timl Jared could translate
the circumscribed goose dialect to a
point where the changes in the baro-
meter were vocally announced and
rain, wind or murkiness predicted two
days in advance with unerring accur-
acy, and Jared Dunn took due credit
to himself for his invincible weather
representations, never mentioning
Honolulu as the source of his erudite
efficiency.
Jared Dunn had nephew, his only
living relative. estranged for some
time He was Harvey Bross and was
now working hard and for small pay
in the village. Harvey was in love
with Vera Morton. They were too
poor to marry as yet. but courtship
had been delight and they were loyal
and hopeful.
The Morton family lived quite a
distance from the town. One morning
early Vera's father and mother drove
The Lakeland evening telegram. (Lakeland, Fla.) 1911-1922, 1916-03-22

A certain dealer had a lot of cheese
which was anything but good. and.
tired of seeing it about, told the as
sistant when he closed the shop to
leave the condemned cheeses at the
door for someone to walk off with.
Thomas occasionally crept to a win
dow to see operations, and at length
went to his master, grinning all over
his face, saying the cheese was gone.
leave another out tomorrow night"
was the masters order, which was
obeyed by the shopman, who, after a
few peeps next evening, walked to his
master in the counting house, scratch
ing his head, and looking as though
some great disappointment had befal.
len him.
rs it gomez" asked the dealer.
mo, sir; that other 'un has walked
back"
The Lakeland evening telegram. (Lakeland, Fla.) 1911-1922, 1916-03-22
HOW PIGEONS BEAR MESSAGE
Matter Is Not as Simple as Is Gener
ally Observation-Disclosures to
Tail Feather.

The general notion that all that has
to be done in forwarding a dispatch
by pigeon is to catch the bird, tie
letter to its leg, and then libcrate it,
is utterly fallacious, as the method of
attaching the message is of great i'm
portance. Besides, to be of much
service, the birds must have been
thoroughly trained; otherwise, IL the
distance to be traversed be great, the
pigeon will in all probability lose its
way, as it depends more upon observa-
ton than anything else for guidance
in it's flights.
Prior to the siege of Paris the
method of affixing the message to the
bird had not received that attention
which it demanded, and consequently
many dispatches were lost in transit
At first the massage was merely
rolled up tightly, waxed over to pro-
tect it from the weather, and then at
tached to a feather in the birds tail.
But it was soon found that the Irvine
which kept the missive in its place
cut or damaged the paper, and, there
fore. in order to prevent it from being
pecked by the pigeon and from being
injured by wet, the dispatch was in
serted in a small goose quill two
inches in length. The quill was then
pierced close to each end with red
hot bodkin, so as not to split 1t, and
in the holes waxed silk threads were
inserted to afTix it to the strongest tail
feather. BY attaching the message to
this part of the birds body, its flight
was not in any way interfered with.
The Lakeland evening telegram. (Lakeland, Fla.) 1911-1922, 1916-03-22

times Mohammed has the reputation
Of being seer. If you like, Madame,
l will take you there tomorrow"
Belle assented She was uneasy
concerning her husband. Major Gar.
rett was thousand miles away in
the interior. He had been sent up to
the head of the Nile with his regi-
ment from Cairo, to take part in the
subsection of one of the Mohammedan
tribes of the Sudan which had taken
it into it's head to go on foray. He
had been gone six months, and she
had not heard from him for two.
She wavered between contempt and
superstition as she accompanied the
dragoman down the teeming lane of
the bazaar, between lines of stalls the
owners of which persisted in scream
ing the merits of their wares. At last
they reached the man with the crys-
tails.
He was an immense Arab, his head
enveloped in a voluminous turban,
and he sat in his stall immobile.
There was nothing in the booth ex-
cept half a dozen crystals, perfectly
round, semitransparent spheres of
glass.
As if he had been expecting her. the
Arab rose and motioned to her to en-
ter the booth. Inside, he handed her
a low chair and indicated that she
81 ha fob
Of the globes from the counter, he
placed it in her hands, at the same
time drawing the curtains which sep
arated the booth from the lane out
side.
Belle Garrett, seated there alone,
heard the raucous cries of the sellers
in the bazaar sound fainter in her
ears. A curious sense came over her
of being divorced from time and
space She was aware of the Arab
at her side, but everything had grown
dark except the crystal, which was
dazzling bright. Then its surface be-
gan to film, it turned opalescent, milky,
Suddenly a picture began to form on
it.
She saw a thorn jungle, and line
of white tents pitched in little clear
ing. Egyptian soldiers were moving
to and fro. She saw the camels on
their picket line, and the men feed
ing them. A tent flap was lifted, and
she saw an officer inside, writing.
She gasped 1t was Dick, her hus-
band!
She wanted to go to him, for it
was so real that now the crystal it
self had vanished. She seemed to be
standing among the tents, stretching
out her arms and calling him. Once
he looked up in her direction; then
he smiled and went on writing She
could see the letter. 1t was addressed
to her, and the date was January II.
1t was that day!
Gradually a sense of something
ominous stole over her. The air was
growing dark. A sandstone from the
The Lakeland evening telegram. (Lakeland, Fla.) 1911-1922, 1916-03-22
FOR BRONCHITIS, WnooplNe COUCH,
Make the Best Remedy Home I23 oorl for 50 cents

Is everything was sold in as liberal and
l.r j manner as the below named drug
lists are selling SchiHmann's New Con
catra,cd EXpeCtorant, absolutely NJ
ause for complaint or dissatisfaction
could possibly arise from anyone. llie,e
druggists say-"Buy bottle Of this rem
edy and try it for Bronchitis. WhoopnG
Cough, Severe Cough. Group or any
Bronchial Affection, and we will return
your money. just the same as we do with
Schiffmann's famous Asthmador, it ii
does not give satisfaction, or if not found
the best remedy ever used for any of
these complaints" Why not take adj
vantage of this guarantee and try this
medicine. and get your money back. rath-
er. than buying another purely on the
exaggerated claims of its manufacturer
or on the strength of testimonials from
others and run the chance of getting
something worthless and also wasting
your money?
The Lakeland evening telegram. (Lakeland, Fla.) 1911-1922, 1916-03-22
By GERTRUDE MARY SHERIDAN
Copyright. 1916. by W. C. Chapman.

Copyright. 1916. by ". G. Chapman)
"Honk honk!"
Grabbed, miserl. old Jared Dunn,
seated on the porch of his low one
story house, bent his ear and listened
intently.
"Ho-o-onk,"
His thin sour lips formed an express
sion of comprehension and satisfac-
ton. He smiled in an eerie way.
You beat EN- all, old bird!" he
chuckled, and l get the credit for it.
Mornin' neighbour he bobbed to a
passing 'mowing?'
Meadow strip hay, yes.
"Get it in afore Wednesday. then"
advised Jared. with wise look at the
sky.
Wet spell?"
Sure thing. within twenty-four
hours"
The sky was clear and spotless, but
Rufus Dawes quickened his step. If
there was one weather-versed man in
Bridgeton, it was Jared. He never
prophesied wrong. The almanac might
err, the signal service bubble, but
Jared never made a mistake Hence,
his neighbor hobbled off at an accel-
Grated pace to save his menaced hay
crop.
Then Jared Dunn. double-faced old
skeesicks that he was, ambled enjoy
ably around to his extensive poultry
yard 1t was with eyes of pride and
exultation that he viewed one particu.
lar fowl among the numerous. This
was a gloriously streaked and crested