davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Northern Wisconsin advertiser. [volume] (Wabeno, Wis.) 1898-1925, 1916-12-29
HEAL YOUR SKIN TROUBLES
With Cuticura, the Quick, Sure and
Easy Way. Trial Free

Battle with Cuticura Soap, dry and
apply the Ointment. They stop itch
ing instantly, clear away pimples,
blackheads, redness and roughness, re-
move dandruff and scalp irritation,
heal red, rough and sore hands as
well as most baby skin troubles.
Free sample each by mail with Book.
Address postcard, Cuticura, Dept. l..
Boston. Sold everywhere.-Adv.
There is a possibility that skirts will
Northern Wisconsin advertiser. [volume] (Wabeno, Wis.) 1898-1925, 1916-12-29
Really Easy.

Jones-I say, Smith, you are good
hand at arithmetic?
Smith--Yes; l am considered very
good. Why?
Jones-Well, here is little problem
for you: There was man named
Little living in Dublin, who had a
daughter. Now, she was in love with
a chap she knew her pater did not
approve of, so one day she eloped with
him. When the old man found out, he
was very angry, and at once followed
them. Now, then, what time was it?
Smith (angrily)-What time was it?
How on earth do vou suppose l can
tell you? / give it up.
Jones phartly)-Why, a Little
after two, of course
Northern Wisconsin advertiser. [volume] (Wabeno, Wis.) 1898-1925, 1916-12-29
Settling IL.

"Fahson," said Brother Buckaloo,
sme and Brudder Sankey Smith has
jess been havin' an intellectual spute
bout de pen and de swo'd. Which
does you say, sab, am de mightier?" >
"Ugh--weD sah," replied sage old
Parson Bagster. "dey bofe has der
p'ints o s'yeriority. F'rinstance, de
swo'd am de best to stick into man
and de pen am de best to stick a
man into. Hurrumph !"--Kansas City
SSar.
Northern Wisconsin advertiser. [volume] (Wabeno, Wis.) 1898-1925, 1916-12-29
To Look at ONLY.

II think this clock is perfectly love-
ly," said the fair customer, "but will
it keep timer"
Madame" replied the salesman
coldly, sit would be as much as my
reputation is worth to sell you a clock
that would keep time. This is an an
tique shop, and nothing modern is toll
Grated here."-St. Louis Post-Dispatch.
Northern Wisconsin advertiser. [volume] (Wabeno, Wis.) 1898-1925, 1916-12-29

CT sEEN Me- Maikafer in the
subway this morning" said
Louis Birsky, the real estater
to Barnett Zapp, the waist manufac-
turer, as they met for luncheon at the
corner table in Wasserbauers. "He
boy a painter"
"Some people don't give swear
what becomes of their children" Zapp
commented.
us it such bad job to be paint
err" Birsky asked.
Seemingly Max Maikafer don't
think So" Zapp replied. Maybe he
would enjoy it to see his son break his
neck from ladder, Birsky."
"What are you talking nonsense
break his neck from ladder?" Birsky
exclaimed.
"a scaffold is just as dangerous,
Zapp went on. Yesterday am seeing
a couple fellers painting from the side
of a building ten stories high, and
even though one of them was an ltal-
iener, got so dizzy watching 'em that
before l could eat my lunch at all ii
cost me 10 cents for some mathematiC
spirits of ammonia. If / would got TIC
earn my living as painter, l would
a whole lot sooner be an aviator, be.
cause while the funeral expenses is
the same as for q painter, an aviator
don't linger long enough to run up a
doctors bill on. his widow"
"You got the wrong idea, Zapp,'
Birsky said. "Maikafer's boy would
be not a house painter but picture
painter"
"a picture painter!' Zapp cried
"A1ld l thought Max Maikafer was a
business man. Why don't he learn the
boy a trade where he could make real
| big money, like buttonhOle maker OF
q pOet?"
THAT only goes to show what you
know from poets" Birsky retorted
"Jake Margonin, from the Fashion
Store, Indianapolis, told me that right
| now there is a Teller which from only
| being poet is now owning most OF
| the gilt-edged real estate in the city
| of indianapolis"
"Sure / know" Zapp declared, "but
| this here Teller was an old established
poet when Hart, Shaffner & Marx and
Kuh, Nathan & Fisher was new be-
| ginners already. Then again, there is
| a bigger opening for poet than there
Is for picture painter. Take the
canned soup business, the breakfast
| food business and even some railroad
companies-all them concerns has got
| working for them poets which they
| already pay them a good yearly sal
| airy, whereas a picture painter must
| got to work piecewOrk, and what fol
wages could pieceworker on pic
lures make when with my own eyes
see it bill from a wholesaler in Welt
| fisch's art store, which Welfisch buys
| 1912 doz. assorted Oil paintings in
small sizes for $3S.75 a dozen, includ
ing shadow boxes and frames, terms
ten off sixty days, ninety days net
Tell me about picture painters J"
Say, there is popular price line
of pictures, and then again there is q
high grade pictures" Birsky said.
"Even so,"s Zapp rejoined. 'You
must got to admit that concern like
B. Altman & Co. carries high grade
line of goods, and when B. Altman
died the stock was good, up-to-the
minute stuff in every, department ex
Northern Wisconsin advertiser. [volume] (Wabeno, Wis.) 1898-1925, 1916-12-29
Lord Roseberyss HIT.

Lord Rosebery once went into a
large London establishment to pur-
chase new hat. AS he stood bare
headed, waiting to be fitted, a bishop
entered on the same errand, and mis-
took the earl for one of the shops as
SiStantS.
Have you hat like this?@'' he asked,
showing his own headgear.
Lord Rosebery took it from him and
examined it critically. NO." he al
length replied, II haven't hat like
that, and if had / shouldn't wear It."
Northern Wisconsin advertiser. [volume] (Wabeno, Wis.) 1898-1925, 1916-12-29
Business Man."

January 1, 1917. Such things you
could only do with railroad, and be-
lieve me, Birsky, if you got indict-
ments hanging over your head for the
rest of your lifetime, there's more
money in collecting railroads than in
collecting oil painted pictures and
don't you forget it."
Copyright New York Tribune.)
Northern Wisconsin advertiser. [volume] (Wabeno, Wis.) 1898-1925, 1916-12-29
Expenditures.

"You Americans are terribly extrav-
agant," remarked the critical man from
abroad.
Perhaps" replied Miss Cayenne.
"Some countries waste money on lux
urious food and raiment and some
squander it on prOtracted warfare"
Northern Wisconsin advertiser. [volume] (Wabeno, Wis.) 1898-1925, 1916-12-29

The Ouinine That Does Not Affect The Head
Because of its tonic and laxa..ve effect Laxative
Bromo Quinine can be taken by anyone without
causing nervousness or ringing in the bead; There
is only one "Bromo Quinine." Il. w. GROVES
signature Is on each2box. 25c
The Meeker herald., 1916-12-09
The Best Crop

"Spuds is the CROP" said Farmer
Jones, 1.-The crop that brings the silver
bpnes-the kale for which the farmer
homes" mo SIR" said Sweet, 'give
me the beet. 1t pays for all the things
we eat, for shoes to At the children's
fSet; the beet pays for the light and
heat ond puts US all on easy street"
"fou're both mistook," said neighbor
Lee, "for If you'd look you'd surely
SEQ there's gold in wheat; wheats
what made me. Whatever anyone
c3n see in any other crop, beats me;
gike me the wheat" said neighbor
Lie. "Sure wheat's all right" said
ol1 man Wood. mo use to fight cause
srbds are good and beets amt bad,
thby bring the mon and digging them
10 Sure some fun; the beet mans work
IL never done. But as for me-" said
old man Wood, "alfalfa blossoms sure
smell good. AlfaIfa's king Of all the
crops, 1t beats the spud and wheat and
hops" II see you're just q little of,
all money mad,' said Deacon Gcff.
.'At spuds and beets can but scoff
and ask you. gentlemen, to doff your
besvers to the crop that's worth more
than all other crops on earth. I'm
speaking, men, Of girls and boys, that
bring the farmer sweeter joys than
Henry Ford with his tin toys. Give
mo the kids and take your wheat and
hay and spuds and sugar beet. w.
Il. vaplon, State Leader Of Boys and
Girls Clubs, Colorado Agricultural
College, Fort Collins. Colorado.
The Meeker herald., 1916-12-09
The Pioneers

AS per Announcement, the annual
winter reunion of the White River
Pioneers society, was held ut
Rooney's hall, Thursday evening.
The first thing on the program was
the business session. The president,
Pioneer L. 8. Bloomfield was in the
chair, and matters in hand were soon
disposed Of.
F. N. JoHantgen was elected presi-
dent, Otto Metzger vice president,
and l.. b. Walbridge secretary-treas-
urer for the ensuing year.
F. f. Sheridan and H. A. Wild
hack were appointed a committee to
collect outstanding dues.
After the business session every
body Joined In the dance, which was
kept up till near the midnight hour,
when all adjourned to the Odd Eel
lows hall, where bn abundance Of
good eats awaited them. After the
supper dancing was. resumed and
continued till the cocks began to
crow.
The fine spread was the work Of
the pioneer ladies' and was arranged
under the efficient management OF
Mrs. l.. l.. Devlin and Mrs. Otto
Metzger.
Notwithstanding very cold night
and another notable attraction, there
was large turnout Of pioneers, the
mesa, up-river country, OakridKe
park region. Powell park and other
sections being we'll represented. A
thoroughly enjoyable time was had
by all. Long live the pioneers.
The Meeker herald., 1916-12-09

After giving President Wilson
"hell" all through the late political
campaign, John 'Clean's" Rocky
News is now heaping fulsome praise
on the Chief Executive for his states
manlike message to Congress last
Tuesday. The Rocky News has be-
come so unreliable since passing into
control of Millionaire Shafier that
abuse or praise at its hands has no
weight one way or the other. Again
we rise to observe that Denver Is bad
ly in need Of an honest and reliable
daily newspaper.
The Meeker herald., 1916-12-09
We Men Must Stick Together

A Los Angeles, California. dispatch
says: A domestic tragedy that might
have led to the divorce court was
narrowly averted when . rural sisi-
tor to the Riverside Fair was saved
by the diplomacy of q United States
Marine.
Uncle Josh had left his wife some
where in the safe and sane "Stock
Exhibit' and wandered into the for
hidden portals of4 "Hoochy-C Coochy"
sideshow.
'.Oficer," exclaimed the irate lady,
approaching Kern, ''see II there ain't
an old fool In there watchin' them
gals.
Unruffied by being taken for po-
liceman, the marine entered the tent,
gave Uncle Josh . straight man to
man tip, and returned with . polite.
''I'm afraid you are mistaken, mad
sm."
!, .Teni1 asaeatas lssef the wsathful
lady discovered her husband investi-
eating the merits Of cream-sepera-
tor.
The Meeker herald., 1916-12-09

Send The Herald to your eastern
friends.
The Meeker herald., 1916-12-09
Look On the Bright Side OF 1t

Henry Clews, the New York bank
er observes:
1t is better for both sides now to
consider the result OF the fight be-
tween the Republican party and the
Democratic party as square and fair
one. and everybody should accept the
inevitable in a kindly spirit, forget
ting and forgiving the animosities
which have cropped out during the
contest and be encouraged by the
prosperity now prevailing throughout
the nation and the strong prospect for
its continuance for some time to coine.
That is something that no other ma
tion can boast of In anything like the
same degree and should be enough to
make the American people happy and
contented, especially when they CON-
pare their lot with that Of the suffer-
ers throughout Europe. Many people
think that our present eiection termi-
mated In q muddle owing to the votes
of the electors being SO close. Think,
however, that is q cause for rejoicing
rather than otherwise, as 1t will serve
to compel both Of our great parties to
put up, as they have done In this
election, high grade men for their
candidates hereafter and not merely
demagogue politicians. 1t marks a
new era for our country, which will
tend to perpetuate our republican
form Of government, which 1 firmly
believe is the best ever devised by
the brain of man, especially for our
cosmopolitan populations govern
ment of the people, by the people,
and for the people. The result of the
election goes to show that there are
but few vital issues at stake between
the two great parties; besides we are
almost sure to have in the field here
after candidates, both learned, capa-
BILE and highly representative men,
similar to those who have competed
In the present Hughes Wilson con-
test. Hence 1t Is to be hoped that IL
will lead to the conclusion that both
sides will recognize the absolute nec-
essity of putting forward their best
citizens; then no serious harm is like
ly to happen to our people or country
whoever may be the prize winner. II
that fact becomes recognized, as ii
should be, by our voting population,
then the best all around men will be
selected for nomination on both sides
and all will be we'll now and forever.
more.
The Meeker herald., 1916-12-09
The High School Concert

Held Thursday evening at the high
school auditorium, drew a large aud
fence despite the other attraction for
the evening-the Pioneers reunion.
The concert company was compos-
ed of Miss Genevra e. Parker, reader
and elocutionist, Simon Breyn, pian-
ist, and Ralph o. Hendren, baritone.
All are artists of high class, and gave
Meeker one of the classiest entertain
ments 1t has ever enjoyed.
The Meeker herald., 1916-12-09

+ When Mark Twain was editor Of a
weekly newspaper one Of his snbscrib-
ers wrote him that he had found a
spider In his paper when 1t reached
him and inquired whether it was a
sign of good luck. The noted humor-
ist replied that the spider was simply
looking over the paper to see which
merchants were not advertising SO he
could visit them, spin a web across
their door and live contented ever
afterward.
The Meeker herald., 1916-12-09

The Indians Of the Basin are pre-
dieting . mild winter, but 1t looks
like they made bad start the middle
Of November. Present weather cOndi-
tions however seem to bear them out.
The redskins base their predictions
at this time upon the laziness Of the
squirrels when they should be filling
up their winter storehouses, and the
light coats of the fur bearing animals
at this time Of fyear.-Vernal Express.
The Meeker herald., 1916-12-09

Little Teddy-Uncle, why do they
have . Thanksgiving day? Uncle
Grouchmore-To give thanks for the
close Of the football season.
The Meeker herald., 1916-12-09

They were discussing heaven and
hell at . dinner party, among the
guests at which WAS the late Mark
Twain. why do you not express
your opinion on the matter?' inquir-
ed on Of the guests Of the humorist.
81 can't very WELL" replied Mark.
You see l have friends in both
nlacea"
The Meeker herald., 1916-12-09

Ignorance was never known t.
bring In . verdict inconsistent will
its intelligence.
The Meeker herald., 1916-12-09

The train WAS drawing into Denver.
The porter approached n Fort Collins
sheep feeder. "Shall Ah brush you
of, Sah?" mo" was the reply, II
prefer to get of in the usual way"
The Meeker herald., 1916-12-09
Nervous Women

When the nervousness is caused by
constipation, ~ 10 often the case, you
will get quick relief by taking Cham
berlain's Tablets. These tablets also
improve the digestion. Obtainable
everywhere.
The Meeker herald., 1916-12-09

Genius is an idea inspired by energy
and nursed by q persistent effort into
accomplishment.
The Meeker herald., 1916-12-09

Next Friday night, dance and sup
per, Coal Greek school house. Come.
The Meeker herald., 1916-12-09

When you see 1t in The Herald
it's SO.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1916-03-06
Deaths Reported.

The following deaths have been re-
ported to the health department in the
last twenty-four hours:
Ralph T. Alternately, 43 years. Gov
eminent Hospital for the Insane.
Joseph S. Farden, II years, 1888 Mon
roe street northwest.
Annie K Paris, 81 years, Iroquois
apartments.
Henry T. Dom. 81 years, 1911 Sd
street northwest.
Frederick Stohlman. II years, 21o 9th
Emma Robinson, 81 years. 2036 l
street northwest.
George S. BowIes, 80 years, $50 X
street northwest
Sarah B. Wise. 40 years, Government
Hospital for the Insane.
George +. Renwick, 55 years, 421 9th
street southeast.
Hester f. Woodf1eld, 81 years, III D
street southeast.
John w. Chamberlain, Al years, $500
NJ street northwest.
Fred f. McCracken. Is years. 3215 r
street northwest.
Joseph Sherman, SO years, Emer-
gency Hospital.
Mary Dixon, 40 years. 2226 Shannon
place. Anacostia.
Roman J. Conrad, 2 years, 1909 North
Capitol street
George Johnson, 60 years, 613 K
street southwest.
Herbert Becky, 81 years, Tubercu-
losis Hospital.
Ann Miller, II years, Blue Plains
D. c.
John Hill, Is years. 337 Virginia ave-
nue. southwest
Francis Rice, 9 years, Children's hos
initial
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1916-03-06
U. S. ASKED TO PREVENT
EXECUTION OF DR.. RENE
Daughter to Personally Appeal to
President to Save Life of
Physician in Mexico.

LOS ANGELES. March 6--Telegrams
to Secretary Lansing of the State De-
partment asking that the American
government take steps to forestall the
execution of DR.. James A Rene, for
merly of Superior Wis. at Mazatlan. on
the west coast of Mexico. have been
sent by relatives and friends here, it
was said today.
Miss Adelaide Rene. daughter of the
physician, who, according to private
advices received Saturday by DR.. j.
A. Adams, at Superior. has been SEN
fenced to be shot March Is, said she
would go TO Washington and person
ally appeal to the President to prevent
the execution. Miss Rene is the only
member of the family in Los Angeles
a present
Mrs Rene and Carroll. twelve-year-
old son. are with the physician AT Ma :
zatlan. Although relatives and TRENDS
have endeavored to communicate with
DR. Rene by radio, they said no reply
had been received.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1916-03-06
SUNDAY SETS NEW RECORD.
Fourth of Vast Outpouring at Balti-
more Turned Away.

Special Dispatch to The Star.
BALTIMORE, March Sixty thou
sand people attended the three serv-
ices al the Tabernacle yesterday, break
ing All records IN the history OF the
Sunday campaigns. A throng esti-
mated at 5000 was turned away In
The evening, being unable to get in;
unfortunately 5000 were refused en-
trance for the same reason in the att
ernoon. making the total for the day
of those who went to the building, got
in or STAYED outside. 10000. The night
attendance was the largest that was
ever gathered together under one root
in Baltimore.
Mr.. Sunday emphasized in his three
sermons the danger of following after
faiths that diverge from the simple
teachings Of the Bible, scored "isms
and schisms." fayed church members
for their Indifference to their duties as
Christians and planted his feet firmly
upon the dogmatic tenets of the old
time religion.
His sermon in the forenoon was on
the text study to show myself unto
God a workman that needeth not to be
ashamed, rightly dividing the word of
truth QI Timothy. 11.15l; In the
had a mind to work" nehemiah. 4.16).
AT night it was Heaven and earth
shall pass away. but my word shall
not pass away" (Matthew. 24.35).
Al the conclusion of each sermon the
evangelist asked all those who wished
to be remembered In his prayers to
hold up their hands, and many re-
sponded.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1916-03-06
Births Reported.

The following births have been re-
ported to the health department in the
last twenty-four hours:
Clarence and Jeanette WEIGH, boy.
Miles r. and Ethel f. Van Sse, girl.
George and Mary Unkaites. girl.
James E. and Elizabeth Rennor. boy.
Daniel V. and Agnes f. Richardson.
boy.
Gustave f. and Eallie J. Law, girl.
Joseph and Katie Johnson. girl.
Henry and Flma Haupa. boy.
Alfred B. and Myra NJ. Goodman. girl.
Bruce G. and Edna r Frick. boy.
William II. and Christina Estey. girl.
Fred A. and Emma +. Ellison. boy
Charles and Leila Dienelt, boy.
Wister NJ. and Keith Chubb. boy.
Otto c. and Marie f. Brahler. boy.
Robert +. and Nellie NJ. Anderson,
boy
William and Bessie Simpson. boy.
George and Annie Pratt. boy.
Arthur r. and Annie r. LomaX, girl.
Bonnie and Lena Headen, boy.
Edward and Elizabeth Freeland, girl.
Howard and Annie Edward, boy.
Robert and Hattie Allen, boy.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1916-03-06
MISS GEORGIA sCHoFIELD.

Mrs. Tracy. Mai. and Mrs. Shipton,
Capt. and Mrs. Theodore Baldwin, Miss
Judge. Mr.. and Mrs. Wallace and Com
mander Sawyer of New York.
Mr. Frederick f. Schrader has re-
turned to New York, and Frederick F.
Schrader. jr., will make Washington
his home.
Mrs. Edward Cooper. wife of Repre-
sentative Cooper Of West Virginia. will
be at home tomorrow from to 6
O'Clock at the Raleigh. Mrs. Edward J.
King. wife of Representative King of
Illinois. will receive with Mrs. Cooper.
Those assisting will be Miss Mary
Smith. Mrs. Carter Glass, Mrs. Ralston.
Miss Slemp, Mrs. F. W. Demsey. Mrs.
Franklin Ellsworth of Minnesota and
Miss Margaret Hardin.
Representative and Mrs. David II.
kincheloe of Kentucky entertained at
dinner last night at Congress Hall,
having as their guests Senator and Mrs.
Barkley and Representative and Mrs.
Arthur Rouse. all of Kentucky.
The young people of Congress
Heights Caves masquerade dance at the
town hall Friday evening. Among those
present were the Misses Annie, Eliza
beth and Barbara Hind, Miss Marian
Miller. Miss Rosie Kerby, Miss Rachel
Mckeon. Miss Mary Simmons Miss
Flora Gutman. Miss Elsie Roberts, Miss
Elsie kleinhenn. and Miss Helen Ker-
by, Dr. Joseph Madigan, Messrs. c. Du
Carroll Rector Charlie Eaton. Sam
Fowler. Letch Overstreet and Maurice
Fowler. Mr.. and Mrs. Sam Alfred
and Mrs. L. f. Vining chaperoned the
dance.
Mrs, James w. Hustled. wife Of Repre-
sentative Hustled. will be at home in
formally tomorrow at 1S45 r street
from $3.50 to S:37 pm. She will be assist
ed by her sister. Mrs. John r. Herrick
or Hampstead. l.. l.: Mrs. William w
i1arts. Mrs. Jouett House, Mrs. Charles
banner Hazen and Mrs. S. Wallace
Dempsey.
Mrs. John T. Coughlin, 735 Quebec
street. will be at home tomorrow from
to pm.
Rev. DR.. Charles C. Mclean and Mrs
Mclean will leave tmorrow for Florida
where they will ba at De Funia X
Springs. En- route they plan to speno
some time at Jacksonville and ST. Au-
gustine.
For the benefit of the Junior League
The Gypsy Prince" is to be presented
~ d VI youiS SoCietV DeODle
at Rauschers this evening, under the
direction Of Mr.. J. Wilder Tomlinson
Another performance will be given to-
morrow evening.
Miss Lillian Hendricks will take the
part of the Princess, while that of the
Prince of Syrville will be taken by Mr.
Newbold Noyes. Miss Gleaves and Miss
Glover will be attendants to the prin-
cess, while the King of Cerobia will be
Mr.. John Cunningham. His prime min
lister will be Mr.. John W. Thompson.
Dr. ]. E. Hegarty and Miss Marguerite
II. Martin were quietly married this
morning at nuptial mass at Holy
Trinity Church. The bride was attend
ed by her sister, Miss Marie Martin
while the groom had for his best man
Mr.. A. Giacomo.
A wedding breakfast was served the
relatives of the two families. imme-
diately after which DR.. and Mrs. He
garty left for an extended honeymoon
trip in the north. DIR. Hegarty is a
graduate of Georgetown University,
was prominent in athletics at that in
stitutioa and has since coached foot
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1916-03-06
VARIED SKETCHES BILLED.
G. w. U. Dramatic Association to
Give Entertainment Tomorrow.

Varied dramatic sketches will feature
the entertainment to be given tomorrow
night by tho George Washington Uni
versity Dramatic Association at the
immaculate Conception auditorium.
There WIN be q comedy. . collage
play and q bit Of Shakespeare. in
which the following win take part:
Misses Frances Dixon, Frances Ges-
chicter. Dorothy Davis. Gertrude Wal
tiers. Lenore Kolar, Florence Wingate,
Mabel Blanchard and Inez Ryan,
Messrs Bayne Lightfoot, Sol Glueck:
Lawrence Burton. Detlow Marthinson.
George Nordlinger. Leon Tashof. The
sketches will include "A Question of
nom shakespeare's sGsrehank Of Ysn4
ice,~