The Lakeland evening telegram. (Lakeland, Fla.) 1911-1922, 1916-07-19
Sam andSue
By M. QUAD
Copyright. 1916, by the Mcclure
Newspaper Syndicate.

ne was buOhl uuu Sduob anu t"~ss
two years old. He had a waddle Ike
a goose when he walked. He moved
over from the town of Grand Ledge to
the town of Eaton Rapids and opened
a butcher shop.
Sue Smith had got eighteen years old
She was a good looking girl, but pert
TO the point of impudence.
Sam brought a bobtailed dog over
from Grand ledge with him.
Miss Sue owned crosseyed cat. She
was not a handsome feline, but she
was an affectionate one Unlike most
cats, she would follow her mistress
about town like loving dog. When
Sue Smith heard that a new butcher
had come to town and that he was
young man who would probably be
looking around for a wife she did not
wait long before she presented herself
at the shop and asked for Juicy piece
Of meat for her companion. The cat,
of course, followed her. She had also
heard the news, and she hoped for
change from the old butcher.
While the young butcher was smll
ing and bowling and filing the order
and saying to himself that good look
ing girl stood before him his bobtailed
dog entered the shop. There was a
growl and a snarl, and crosseyed cat,
bobtailed dog, girl and butcher and
sawdust seemed to be all mixed up.
The row lasted until the cat flew out,
and then Sue Smith turned to the
butcher and said:
81 would like to burn your dog, sir!'
exclaimed Miss Sue as she flashed the
young man look of indignation.
"Oh, as to that" he replied with
faint smile, your old cat may sudden
ly disappear of the earthv'
And that was how her crosseyed
cat and his bobtailed dog first met and
there were no cooling doves around to
make them remember the first meet
ing with pleasure. Miss Sue went
around telling all her friends that the
new butcher not only had the heart of
a fiend, but he dared stand right up
to her and sass back.
During that year they met time aft
er time. Sometimes the dog and the
cat were along, and sometimes they
were not. When they were not there
was just as much cause for sarcastic
words as when they were. For In
stance, when the butcher was about
to pass Miss Smiths gate one day and
Miss Sue was hanging over 1t he lifted
his hat and made a grand bow and
said:
II trust, Miss Smith. that your old
cat is dead and buried"
Sir. she replied. wanting to hit
him In new place this time, 81 was
watching your walk as you came up
the street. 1t is not walk; 1t is a
waddle. You walk like a goose, SIR"
And they glared at each other and
glared and glared, and Sam finally
passed on, and Sue went into the house
with tears in her eyes, to be asked by
her mother:
whats happened nowf'
TITS that Sam Horton. He had the
cheek, after what l have said about
him. to accept an invitation to Molly
Hard's birthday party last night. Yes,
he was there. Not only was he there,
but Molly had several good words for
him. oh, how l hate himI"
There, there, daughter. Don't get
so worked up about It." soothed the
mother. 'aThis is strange world, and
1t wouldn't be so very strange II love
came to you both by and by"
"Neverv' was the terrible reply.
Sam Horton was hurt by having his
walk called a. waddle, but there was
nobody to console him. Therefore as
he sawed a beef bone in two he con-
soled himself by saying:
Darn that Smith grill will marry
her or der
One day Sam Horton had gone out
into the country with his horse and
wagon to buy q calf. On that same
day Miss Susie Smith had taken a walk
about . mile and sat down on the
bank Of the river. She was q bit wor.
ried over the young butcher. It was
becoming more and more difficult for
her to find hard words to apply to him.
When last he had passed her his face
almost wore a smile.
She was meditating very deeply on
this weighty subject when Sam and
his cart and calf came in sight Of the
road. he was driving like all butchers
drive. The horse was at his best trot
and the driver was looking around TO
view the landscape That horse was
headed in an almost straight line for
the girl. She saw 1t and gasped. She
saw it and hastily rose up and rather
more hastily the treacherous soil under
her feet crumbled away, and she went
tumbling down the bank and landed In
the river with a great splash. She did
not know when the butcher pulled IN
his horse and jumped from his cart.
She did not know when he came linn
ing after her. She did not know when
he Owed after her and crawled up the
bank with her dripping form in his
arms She did not know when he ar.
rived at her fathers gate with the
cheerful calf and the half drowned
girl in his cart.
In fact Miss Sue Smith was not
much on the know for good many