The Monticellonian., 1916-05-11
6he MAN WHO
 SPOKE LATIN

Mementoes of Average Jones' ex- ploits in his chosen field hang on the walls of his quiet sanctum. But nos where does the observer find any rec ord of one of the Advisors most euri- ous cases, running back two thousand years; for it's owner keeps it in his desk drawer, whence the present chronicler exhumed It, by accident. one day. Average Jones has always insist ed that he scored failure on this, be- cause. through no possible fault of his own, he was unable to restore a docu- ment of the highest historical and lit erary importance. Of that let the i'm partial reader judge.
 It was while Average Jones was awaiting the break of that deadlock of events which, starting from the flat dweller with the poisoned face, finally worked out the strange fate of Telfik Bey, that he sat one morning, break fasting late. Contrary to his impec- cant habit, Average Jones bore the somewhat frazzled aspect of a man who had been up all night. Further Aiuitdtioh oi tuA0l III llt Wiub yawn, of which he was in mid-enjoy- ment, when a hand on his shoulder cut short his ecstasy.
 Sorry to interrupt so valuable an exercise" said languid voice. But" nd the voice stopped
 Hello. Bert" returned the Advisor. looking up at the faultlessly clad slen- derness of his occasional coadjutor, Robert Bertram. "Sit down and keep me awake till the human snail who's hypothetieally ministering to my wants can get me some coffee You said but and nothing further The con Junction but in polite grammar, or dinarily has cometlike tail to it.
 "Apropos of polite grammar. do you speak Latin?" asked Bertram care lessly.
 Not enough to be gossipy in it.
 Then you wouldn't care to give a job to man who can't speak anything else?"
 So that's the other end of the but is t?' said Average Jones. "Go on. Elaborate"
 Bertram laid before his friend printed clipping in clear, large type, saying: When I read this, l couldn't resist the notion that somehow or other it was in your line; pursuit of the adventure of life, and all that. Let's see what you make of it."
 Average Jones strengthened in his chair.
 "Latin!" he said. And an ad. by the look of it. Can our blind friend. J. Alden Honeywell, have taken to the public prints?"
 Hardly, l think. This is from the Classical Weekly Baltimore publiea- tion of small and select patronage"
 "Hm. Looks ra-a-a-ather alluring," commented Average Jones with a pro- longed drawl
 He bent over the clipping, studying these words:
 L. livius M. F. Praenestlnus, quod- Tibet in negotium non inhonestum qui victum merean loeare veim. Gittera- tus sum; scriptum facere bene scio. Stipendia multa emeritus, scientlarum belii, praesertim muniendi, sum peri tus. Hac de re pro me spondebit M. Agrippa. Lathe tantum scio. Si- quis me velit eonvenire, quovis die mane adesto in pubicis horts urbis Baltimorianae ad signum apri.
 Can you make it out?" asked Der tram.
 "Hmm-m. Well-the general sense. Livius seems to yearn in modern print for any honest employment, but especially scrapping of the ancient variety or secretarying Anybody who wants him can find him in the Park of the Wild Boar in Baltimore. That's about what make of 1t. Now, what's his little lay. wonder"
 My informant tells me that Mir Livius. who seems to have been an all round sort of person, helped organize fire brigades for Grassus, and was one of the circle of minor poets who wrote rhapsodies to the fair but frail Clo- dia's eyebrows, earlobes and insteps.
 Your informant? The mans actu- ally been seen, then ?"
 "oh, yes. He's on view as per ad. vertisement l understand"
 Average Jones rose and stretched his well-knit frame. Baltimore will be hotter than the Plaee-as-Isn't," he said plaintiyely
 Barye's splendid bronze boar crouches, semi-shaded, in the center of Monument park, Baltimores social hilltop. There Average Jones lounged and strolled through the longest hour of a glaring July morning. People came and went. One individual only maintained any permanency of situa- tion. He was gaunt, powerful. freekled man of thirty who sprawled on settee and regarded Average Jones with obvious and amused inter- est. In time this annoyed the Ad- Visor, who stopped short, facing the settee.
 Hes gone" said the freckled man.
 Meaning Livius the Roman?" asked Average Jones.
 Exactly Lucius Livius, son of Marcus Praenestinus.'
 Are you the representative of this rather peculiar person. may I ask?"
 No, I'm not Mir. Livius' representa- tive. I'm in and of the department of Latin of Johns Hopkins university Name. Warren. Sit down"
 Thanks" said the other. Name. Jones. Profession, advertising advisor. Object. curiosity