The Washington times., 1916-11-24
Don Marquis
Column
This IL One Of Our Lsrsv,s D.y.

This IL One 81 Our Lssgsis Daya
We are going to let the contribu
tors do IL today. without fear or favo.
or editing, picking up the mail as q,
lies and using contributions till rh,
column will hold nothing more.
Letter No. 4.
TO isiDoRA DUNCAN.
Art thou mere mortal. Oh! thou nre
Thou ,s. hssrpi:t Of the cosmie sym
Thou paIpitant and brave interpreter
Or desthless meanings In immortal
Terpsichore incarnate, lyric rame.
Art thou mere mortai7 In there death
can quench
Thy viyldness' Can creeping cold
Such ,s1s,ia, yi,si beauty in the silent
Nay. rather dost thou prove the soul
can make
The n..h Itself immortal, breathing
From an tn. ages into those n,ho
or mos, ethereal nr.' Thou has
That SGay 1;ns ,S.T s.n transcend the shack
These musty morsiists forever curse
Thou art the naked truth. the epic
OF vsstsi Immortality In life,
The siorious music OF thy dancing
surr'' eternal in tn. heart. of men
=, 7. kimbsii.
Personally. we believe that Miss
Duncan II more or less mortal. But
there 10 nothing further from our in
tention today than the desire TO stir
up . controversy. She may not he
mortal at all. and We pass on to
Letter Ne. 2.
Alas! the thick soio has been re,
duced. IL II downtrodden, the poor
proietariat Sincerely. JCDEN.
We don't know whether We get that
or not. But this In one OF the days
when we don't care. Let US open
Letter No. ..
PART II OF COOPERATIVE ENGLISH
JOKE. SEASON or pis.iT.
sir-i was discussing with one
OF bis winter run OF the Portmsntesu
Theater In New York when Mister
Edward l.. Bernsys. his press agent.
you know. said all OF a sudden
Well, any Portmantosu ir a storm,
I said that's a good one. I bet oii
:nn MARQUIS would like 20 know a
thing like that for his nice coiyum,
when Ethel LeGinska, "the Paderew,
ski Of Women Pisnists"-hons.ttoGod
plays an ailchop., program st Car,
negie Hall. Deer. L.. chipped In and
said IL drama. got into the coiyum
then why not music. whereupon
said, all OF another sudden, yes. II
Part Ill OF this joke will come out
just before Christmas when the peo.
pie need somathinE TO laugh at. IL
will deal with a gentleman In the
teeth. Faithfully yours. W. p. N.
The. trouble about getting up q
column In this fashion Il that you
can't keep the press agents out. It's
rather: hard 90 keep them out any
how. Let'us pass on 20
> Letter Nc. 4.
Up In Vermont we used also TO talk
about SMALL SOULS; And a common
expression was to this effect:
That such a mans soul was 80
that 10000 OF 'em could light on
the point OF a needle and hsye q three
days march. Hank w.
Lrttcr No. D.
IL q postal card and remarks:
Did Ruth Law come from Prussia
That country II now SO conspicuousiy
Anne o'Nymous.
Letter Ne. q
The next piece OF mail Is q beauti.
fuI book from II. +. keith's Palace
Theater, office OF Walter J. Kingsley,
general press 'rspressntatiys; entitled
Is about the clsssiest example OF
first-chop publicity that has foated
our way In moons and moons. We
lay Il down, with an accelerated pulse
beat. and open,
DON MARQUIS; ! don't know any
more about the game OF golf than
the man about whomlI once read in
The sun, who, when asked IL he knew
much about the game said that ne
didn't even know the game, said that
he didn't even know which end OF
sign in the window of a department
store. which read 'Goif Hose" What
is the hose, used for? serving the
tee? j. 8. A.
The hose is used at the nineteenth
hole. We pass on to
Letter No. 2.
THE GILDED TRAIN.
Sad suffrage, ciphering her loss and
gain
signs as she looks upon her labor
lest.
"Fuli many a Good has EVIL In its
And ours had too-it ran from
coast to coast"
Get M. strout.
Well. well, so the space fills uni
We are going home and feed an cat.
meal cracker to the baby.
DON XARoUIS