The Washington herald., 1916-01-31

good. The people think he should be
Oakley, OF Hartford, Conn. Oakley made
reputation for himself as president OF
the American Association of Baldheaded
Men. The organization, while national
in its scope, usually held its annual
meetings in Connecticut, and Oakley
made speeches at these gatherings which
could not fail to impress one and all
with his mastery of the spoken word.
People began to seize upon the idea that
any man who could talk So plausibly at
an annual banquet OF baldheads, could
soon make himself felt in the halls OF
Congress.
In addition to heading the baldheads
of America, Oakley has served as alder
man In Hartford and as a member of
the school board. He is an able chap,
but II is at the banGuet table that he
speaks most freely. Call on Oakley un-
eXpectedly to make a few after-dinner
remarks on almost any subject whatso-
ever. and he will do so not only &C
ceptably, but with the utmost alacrity.
One feature Of Oakey's speeches which
have helped to popularize them and him
in Connecticut is their brevIty As much
as he dotes on rising TO his feet to utter
few well-chosen remarks, he usually
limits himself to about ten minutes. He
always stops talking at the Identical mo-
ment when he has ceased to have any
thing further to say. A great many
otherwise excellent takers could profit
by copying that feature OF Oakey's
speaking code-but they won't.
In addition to not having as many op-
portunities for making after dinner
speeches as he would like, Oakey's life
has been marred somewhat by the fact
that he is always being thrown where
he Is obliged to listen to muslc-and he
was born without the slightest sense OF
tonal harmony. Music may soothe the
| savage, but Oakley is no savage, and II
merely annoys and distracts him What
is music to anybody else is to Oakley only
a systematic distribution Of needless
noise. He dislikes IL all, from lullaby to
oratorio, and from ragtime to dirge For
great many years he has been trying
to find a first class hotel where he can
sit with friends and quietly discuss
merry subjects unheckled by the blare
OF an orchestra-but he has searched in
vain. With the invention OF the victroIa
and its canned melodies, Oakley almost
took to drink
A few years ago Oakley married into
a family every one of whom is musical
So that even in the privacy OF his own
home ne knows not tranquility. He has
, abandoned all hope Of peace on earth.
and looks forward with much mlsgivings
to playing a harp and listening to an
angel chorus in the world to come.
Chairman James Hay, Of the House
committee on Military Affairs, which re-
Gently went to the mat with the national
defense problem. has been a member of
that committee ever since he entered
Congress Is years ago In that time.
he is said to have missed only two com
mittee meetings.
Seward H. Williams, new congressman
from Ohio, attended Princeton IJnIyer-
sity. preparatory to studying law al
Washington and Lee University in VIr.
ginia. When he was about to leave
Princeton for the Virginia institution, he
vert to one OF his professors to obtain
certain lines of advice. The professor
gave him the advice. some letters OF
introduction, and as he bade him fare
well, said to him:
Let me know how you get along. You
have a good mind and there is no reason
why you shouldn't make something of
yourself. VIII you let me hear from
you?''
Williams promised the professor that
he would. He really intended to: but
time went on. and he procrastinated. For
nearly % years now he has kept thinking
that just as soon as he got a little spare
time he would make good his promise
and let that professor hear from him
At last he feels certain he will get the
thing done. He is going to go up tc
the White House and tell his old pro-
fessor that he succeeded in making his
way to Congress. The professor was
Woodrow Wilson.
William A. Ayres, OF Wichita, Kansas
who succeeded Victor Murdock in Con.
gress, was once campaign manager for
Sockless Jerry Simpson.