The Pioche record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1908-1925, 1916-09-01
SMOKE FROM THE WEEKLY PIPE
By A. KKUTT


/ INTO our office one day and told us
he would be goldanged if he would
stand for any more coarse work
from his better half. we ware
under the impression that he had
sure been having the mits on will,
the old lady. Tomkins himself was
some corker and so alfred mean
ana close that he used to skim the
inllk on the top and then turn II
over and skim it on the bottom than
lea the leavings to the children. He
was ranked as the biggest skinflint
IN Podunk. and yet he had his good
qualities, but one needed a 10-mile
spyglass to discern the merest SEM
blance to anything of the kind.
The old lady was some corker
herself and it was doubtful If either
one was ever really happy unless
scrapping with the other.
They had three great big fine corn
Suns WHO were most popular
with all the boys, who always had n
hard time getting next, owing tn
either the old man or the old woman
coming in and joining the party when
any OF the boys were present. And.
lnasmuch as Old Man Tomkins liked
TO play checkers, someone was alwavs
elected to let the o. M. beat him.
thus endeavoring to stand in" Ar
ter the games, however, he was rs
ualy absent minded and forgot the
courtesies extended in this respect
so that the boys were in the some old
rut about all the time.
Well, o. M. Tomkins owned tho
Whangdoodle" mine and while run
ning the ranch had blown in all the
money the ranch could make on the
development of the mine. Then he
struck it and how popular the old
man became. He was made an hon
orary member Of the local fire de-
partment; his name was in the paper
weekly and he was prominently men
toned as possibility for congress-
to save the nation from it's friends ali
Washington.
In due course of time nothing
would do but the old lady and the
"goils" MUST go to San Francisco
to do their fall shopping, they hav-
ing outgrown the local stores, and as
matter of fact they desired now to
circulate among the people with an
equal COB of tainted material, or at
least could move in the same class
of automobiles as they.
Father now changed his shirt
weekly and wore carpet slippers
around the house evenings, showing
marked improvement and prosper
ity in every movement, and they
certainly were the cyonsure of all
eyes in their native habitat.
To make long story short, fiat
was finally rented in the city and the
family went down to put in a few
months rubbering and rubbing ell
bows with the real eclat of San Fran
cisco.
They moved into the fiat on Mon
day and ON Tuesday some of their
Ploche friends went around to see
how they were getting along. and
found them all there comfortably "at
home, Of course the visitors had
to be shown through the depart
ment", as the o. NJ. called it. and led
by Mary, the Oldest daughter, every
body trouped along to see the place.
Starting at the kitchen very room
was inspected and it's many advan-
taGes properly exhibited to the en-
yious gaze of the Wis. ors
Finally they camc to the bathroom
ard, opening the door, Mary said
Now here is the bathroom and you
can see that we have every modern
convenience. And such a beautiful
tubt We can hardly wait till Sat
urday night to try it,"
This simply proves the contention
that money brings its own reward,
and we certainly hope that when
Saturday night came the whole
DANCED family tried the blooming
tub. Don't you?