davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Monticellonian., 1916-11-02

HY SEE where the police gets after
 the feller which is running the
 Russian ballet" Barnett Zapp said as he glanced over the bill of fare in Wasserbauer's Restaurant.
 Some theayter managers is very lucky that way" Louis Birsky, the real estater, said.
 How lucky?" Zapp demanded.
 Because what the police calls bad, looks awful good to whole lot of peo- pie. Yes, Zapp. all that show needs is for the police to call it immoral, and couple of orchestra seats down front becomes right away as valuable as two perfect matched pearls from ten carats apiece" Birsky said. "The next time I get roped in for such a thing l would go to an Optician not speculator and buy Il pair of hum dred dollar field glasses, and stand up for dollar in the back of the gallery. 1 could save a lot of money that way"
 And was it so bad like the police said?" Zapp asked
 Well, I'll tell you," Birsky replied. You wouldn't think it to look at policeman what delicate disposition such a feller has got. A New York policeman will get red over something in a theayter which for years respect able young feilers in the old country has been taking their mothers to see and neither of 'em turned q hair, y understand. Also down at Coney Island a policeman will hide his face and holler for the police because a lady has got on bathing suit which if one of them actresses wore it in .Follies' show where they walk across blanks over the heads of the SO-called two dollar seats, y'understand, com pared with the other ladies in the show you would think she was dressed for starting out in an open oitermo- bile to call on her husbands rela- tions.'
 .'Was the show so bad like the po- lice said?" Zapp inquired once more.
 Well, I'll tell you," Birsky repeat ed. ''when the police receives letter that show is immoral and they should please look the matter up and oblige, Zapp, they try to put them selves in the place of the average theayter goer; but the only thing is, they got an idee that people which goes most to the theayter was never in such a place before in their lives. In particular, when 1t comes to show like the Russian ballet where the orchestra seats would cost five dollars apiece at the box office if they was for sale there, the police thinks that excepting the ushers everybody in the theayter is visiting in New York for the first time from place where they still got an idee that dol mans is the latest up-to-the-minute de sign in women's outer garments, y understand, and not being experienced in posters by this here artist named Bakst, they don't know whether it's Ben Hur' or David the Shepherd King till the curtain goes up and shows the inside of the harem with all the ladies not yet dressed to re- ceive company"
 Naturally people from the country seeing such thing would get a shock" Zapp commented.
 .'They would if they was there" Birsky said. but actresses and actors is got to go long way to shock a New York audience. In fact, Zapp. if the police knew their business they would arrest the two front rows of a New York audience on looks alone, for the bad effect the faces has got on
The Monticellonian., 1916-11-02

imagination to enjoy ballet" Zapp said. "and the trouble with you is, Birsky, that you aint got no imagina tion."
 Maybe I ain't," Birsky agreed, "aber when the book says: Mrs. Fa tima Harris is the favorite wife of Sultan Charles E. Harris, y'under- stand, and couple of hundred young ladies comes out and dances it for you, for all you understand what they are driving at they might just so well be dancing: This theayter with every seat occupied can be emptied in three minutes. Look around now and walk, not run or that the management re- quests the ladies to remove their hats. I claim to got just so much im- agination as anybody else. Zapp, bur
The Monticellonian., 1916-11-02

with this here Russian ballet it aint enough that you should be mind read CT You've got to be leg reader and that's all there is to it.
 Might it's because you ain't ae- quaiBted with the Russian language maybe Zapp suggested. You take a Russian ballet which ain't in the country two weeks. y'understand, and naturally they couldn't even talk the English language let alone dance il"
 "Then how did the police get on that it was immoralf" Birsky asked.
 Probably they sent policeman there which speaks Russian" Zapp said They've got such fellers on the police force, Birsky. There is even policemen which can shake down saloon keepers in every European lan- guage, and Chinese and Hebrew, also, Birsky, and besides, Birsky, what business do you got supporting Rus sian ballet? 1 thought you was against the Allies"
 Me against the Allies?" Birsky ex- claimed. How can you say such a thing? I've got just so many custom CTS which is for the Allies as against em, Zapp-more even, and l am per fectly neuter about this here war. Furthermore, I've been an American sitson now going on twentytwo years, and 1 think that that oitermobile fac tory out in Detroyit is quite right which wouldn't give jobs except to sit sons"
 "Aber if everybody done the same thing, Birsky, what's going to become of the greenhorns?" Zapp asked. Ut takes five years to get to be sitson,, and in the meantime they must got to starve. Is that the idee? It's like all them advertisements you see for ex- perieneed salesmen. If every concern done the same thing. Zapp, sales man would got to start in as q new beginner with at least five years ex- perience as a salesman"
 "Or else lie about it." Birsky said
 ''Aber you couldn't lie about being a sitson," Zapp continued. You've got to show the papers,
 "Well, maybe this here oitermobile concern says that they wouldn't pro- mote nobody unless he becomes a sit son." Brsky admitted.
 Even so" Birsky went on, my idee is that a feller should become a sit son like he gets married. He should do it for love, because if a feller gets married for money and his wife should go broke, he aip't going to stay faith ful to her very long. and if a feller becomes a sitson to get job, y'under- stand, all such feller needs is to lose his job and right away he becomes a no good American sitson. Then if we should have to go to war and would got enough of them oitermobile factory sitsons around, you wouldn't be able to hear yourself think for the powder mills exploding
 That's neither here nor there" Birsky said There's only one way to look at it: if q felier makes his liv- ing in country, he should be a sit son."
 .Is that so?" Zapp retorted. Well, if all the Americans living in Mexico would of taken out sitson papers there what would of happened to em?"
 "The same as happened to 'em when they didn't" Birsky said. But, any how, Zapp, might if all the Americans which went to Mexico would of be- come Mexican sitsons, they would of Americanized the country maybe, and instead of revolutions down there they would now got direct primaries and
The Monticellonian., 1916-11-02
Square Deal for the shons

If women had only the courage to stop shopping when they are tired" said q young woman the other day. They buy things then that they do not and never will like and it is bother to the women and Il needless expense to the shops. The goods are inevitably returned and credited. When shops are so decent about ac- eepting goods and crediting them it is only fair to such establishments to give them square deal"
The Monticellonian., 1916-11-02
 If Muet Re cot

Femnism. like socialism, is difficult to contine within the boundaries Of formula. Mir. w. L. George, in 'Wom- an and Tomorrow" has done what is possible in this direction. Feminism he says, is, broadly, the furtherIng of the interests of women, philosophically the ieFeiihg Of the sexes, and specifical- ly the social and political elaancipa- tion of woman.
The Monticellonian., 1916-11-02
Fire HYdrants Protected-

An ordinance passed by the authori- ties of San Bernardino. Cal, specifies that no vehicle shall be allowed to stand within 15 feet of fire hydrant. That innocent persons may not disre gard the restriction unwittingiy. the fire chief has had both the hydrant and the adjoining curb painted red. On this red strip indicating the forbid den area appear the words, "Keep Away' in large white letters.
The Monticellonian., 1916-11-02
New Use for comnressed Air

Blowing cotton from one department to another through suitable tubes is the latest employment of compressed air in manufacturing plants. In one in- stance California felt manufacturer makes use of compressed air for con yeying damp wool from the securing plant squeezers to another building across the street, in which are located the sun-eXposed drying rooms. The method is said to be clean and rapid.
The Monticellonian., 1916-11-02
Fiber Sponoe.

The Loofah sponge, now la general use, is made from the network of &ber from the inside of the gourd, probably one of the oldest vessels known to man. Japan furnishes the best sponges of this kind. The fiber used in the Loo- fah sponge is dried thoroughly, after which it becomes wholesome and crisp,
The Monticellonian., 1916-11-02
Shame on You, Aimee.

Hello" exclaimed Cholly. us he was about to board the crowded excursion boat, the ark seems to be pretty we'll filled up!''
 Yes" rejoined his friend Aimee, who was there in all her glory. "all the animals are on deck except the monkey Hurry on board"
The Monticellonian., 1916-11-02
Wars Will Come In Future as Tn Past Despite Talk of Ideal Era of Peace
By BILLY" SUNDAY. Evangelist

I favor war where the occasion justifes it. Every thing the people of this country have they secured through warfare. Independence and the freedom of slaves came through war. There have been since time mmemoral and there will be in the future and all this talk about the ideal of peace bunk
 l don't believe in unnecessary fighting, but there things that cannot be accomplished without I in sympathy with the spirit that moved Henry Ford to try to peace in Europe, but do not favor the method of attempting to secure 1t. y effect peace there is by legislative enact
The Monticellonian., 1916-11-02

country Birsky protested, while Mexieo-thats something else again"
 You bet your life 1t is.e Zapp said. and when q feler goes to make liv- ing in Mexico, Brsky, there's only one thing he should ought to take out down there-not sitson papers but life insurance"
 Copyright. New York Tribune)
The Monticellonian., 1916-11-02
New View of Child Life.
United States
 

Another sign of soee changing attitude toward all children IS the that rownps responsible for the future the c dren day. The itself has proved this in its sage of child-labor law
 but item the program for protecting children rather than punishing them.
The Monticellonian., 1916-11-02
Strictly Recuiar.

That nurse wanted an extortionate price to attend to the baby"
 Well. isn't nursing babies naturally a holdup businessf"
The Monticellonian., 1916-11-02

he morals of the actors and actresses. However, Zapp, supposing that the people which goes to see the Russian ballet is as innocent as the police claims, Zapp, it wouldn't make no diff ference anyhow, because ballet is ike the deef and dumb language, Zapp, people has got to study it for years before they know what it means. In fact. Zapp, if the police continues Q find this here Russian ballet IS im- moral, Zapp, you would see advertise nents in the paper:
The Monticellonian., 1916-11-02

think the only effect there by legislative by congress authorizing the government to intervene and urge cessation of holies.
The Monticellonian., 1916-11-02
LEARN TO BE A RUSSIAN BAL LET AUDIENCE AT HOME.

New method. You pay only for the diagram and postage which is small. Everything illustrated. Plain, simple, systematic. Write for free booklet today.
The Monticellonian., 1916-11-02

Because as it stands now, you've got 10 take the police's word for 1t that t's immoral. Even the fifty cent books which the ushers tries to sell you lon't help you any, which l picked up one in the aisle and read it going nome in the subway. and l give you ny word. Zapp. that book was just so good a description of Within the Law aallet."
 That's because you've got to get
The Monticellonian., 1916-11-02
Emotions.

Copyright. New York Tribune3
The Pageland journal. [volume] (Pageland, S.C.) 1911-1978, 1916-12-20
Stop Matching" for Drinks

Monroe Enquirer.
Down in Lumberton the Off
cials are trying to stamp out that
form of gambling-matching
CONS for soft drinks, cigars,
cigarettes, etc. That species of
gambling is going or around
every soft drink fountain aud
cigar stand the country over.
but noDody seems to paw any
attention to 1t. If a nigger shoots
craps he is up against 1t in the
courts, but every day here and
in every town in this State gen
tlemen whose names are on
church rolls walk I'D and gam.
BILE for drinks or cigars and
nothing is done about it, when
If a little niger in the barn loft
stakes a nickle on a crap game
all the machinery of the law IS
put in motion to arrest him, and
he is brought before the court
and is fined or sent to the chain
gang. 1t is Just as much against
the law for the gentleman who
has his name on tho church roll
and who stands in with the
preacher to match coins for soft
drinks and cigars as it is for the
nlgger tO stake his money on a
skin" game, but at the hands of
the law the little nigger gets if
IN the neck while the respecta-
bic church man goes on his way
and nothing is said about his
gambling.
The Pageland journal. [volume] (Pageland, S.C.) 1911-1978, 1916-12-20
Line From McBee to Monroe
Will Be Built

Chester, Dec. 15.-It has been
officially learned from an Off
cial high up in Seaboard Air
Line railway circles that the
new railroad surveyed from Nc
Bee to Monroe, N. c., will begin
construction at an early date.
AS is we'll known this line has
been run by surveyors several
times, and 1t is fact that the
last line made will be the estab.
lished route.
1t is reliably stated that the
Seaboard will have a controlling
interest in this new line. Sever
al stations will be established on
this road. 1t will enter South
Carolina via Pageland. 1t is
understood that the road will be
under construction early in the
year. Work will probably be
started al McBee and Monroe
simultaneously in order to facil
itate the rapid construction of
the road, it is stated. The coun
try to be traversed by this new
South and North Carolina short
line is rich not only III farm
products, but timber as well, and
has long needed transportational
facilities.
The Pageland journal. [volume] (Pageland, S.C.) 1911-1978, 1916-12-20
Anti-Liquor Bills Flood Two
Houses of Congress

Washington, Dec. 15.-Legis
lative measures aimed at destruc-
ton of the liquor traffic contin-
ue to accumulate in Congress as
both houses are deluged with
petitions from all parts of the
country urging adopipns 0f16s
National prehibiljoh M
tional amendment and passage
of other ami liquor measures in :
clhding fhs Sheppard bill to pro
hlbn Ahe manufacture and sale
ofiquof in the District of Col :.
umbia.
The House Postoffice Com
mittee opened the door to an
other phase of the problem to-
day in reporting favorabIy a bill
designed to close the mails alb
solutely 10 advertising of any in
toxicating liquors and to deny
mail order houses the right to
go into either 'wet or dry" terri
tory TO solicit sales through the
medium of the mails.
No move was made during
the day by prohibition leaders
in the House regarding the con-
stitutiocal amendment reported
Yesterday from the judiciary
committee, but Representative
Webb, chairman ofthe commit
tee plans to ask the. rules com
mittee, for a special rule to
get the resolution before the
House soon after the holidays.
The consensus of opinion in the
House seemed to be that the
resolution cannot get the neces-
sary two-thirds majority in the
Sixty-fourth Congress. Even
Representative Webb is not san.
guine of the success now, but he
is confident that the amendment
will receive more votes than il
did in the last Congress when it
had thirteen votes more than a
majority. By the time the next
Congress has considered the is
sue, he believes the victory can
be won.
The Pageland journal. [volume] (Pageland, S.C.) 1911-1978, 1916-12-20
Observer Building at Charlotte
Burns


Charlotte Observer.
Fire of unknown origin visit
edThe Observer Building at
$50 o'clock Saturday morning
with the result that the greater
part of the plant of The Observ.
er Printing house was complete.
ly destroyed and the property of
The Charlotte Daily Observer
was so seriously damaged, chief
ly by water, that for the comm q
week the paper will be issued
from the presses of The Char
lotte News, President and Gen
eral Manager w. G. Dowd hav
ing very generously rendered
the use of his plant pending the
time when The Observer will
be able to restore its equipment.
1t is hoped that this will be by
the latter part of the week, everv
means having been invoked to
hasten the time to the end that
observer readers may suffer
Just as slight Inconvenience as
possible.
The fire was discovered dur.
ing the early hours Saturday
morning in the rear section of
the third floor of The Observer
building, this being the five.
story structure behind the OBJ
server building proper. in which
is locatsd-ttlAl mechanical 4
departments of the Charlotte
Daily Observer and The Obser-
yer Printing House. Harold
Lewis, IL year-old carrier boy
was the first to detect the blaze
and he quickly gave the alarm.
The night shiftiin the composing
room had just finished their
work of getting ready for the
big Sunday issue and the city
edition of Saturdays paper had
just been run off from the press
IN the basement. Everything and
everybody were about ready to
go home.
The Pageland journal. [volume] (Pageland, S.C.) 1911-1978, 1916-12-20
There's Hope for the One Horse
Farmer

what hope is there for a
one.horse farmer, if any?" asks
a reader. 1t all depends on the
kind of man he is. While hay-
ing only one work animal is a
handicap, there are worse. For
instance, we'd rather risk max
ing paying crop with one
mule on rich land thai to try il
on poor land with dozen mules.
Peas. beans and the clovers can
be grown as we'll by the one.
horse farmer as by the larger,
and crop rotations that will
build I'D the land are Just as
easily possible with the same
fellow. Get out of the one horse
class as soon as you can, of
course; but the mere fact that
YOU are one-horse farmer bv
no means shuts the door of hone
One OF the most successful farm
erS we know, a man rated at
S5O0,OOO. started thirty years ago
with a single gray mare and an
unlimited supply OF spunk. Yes
the one.horse farmer has a
chance, and a good one.-Ex.
The Pageland journal. [volume] (Pageland, S.C.) 1911-1978, 1916-12-20
Charged Against the Moon

Below is a comment by Prof.
Massey in the Progressive Farm.
er with which a great many OF
our readers will not agree. Tell
MIR. Massey what you know
about such matters:
One of my neighbors saws
that if you kill hogs when the
moon is increasing the meat will
not turn out as much lard as il
would If you kill on the decrease
OF the moon. What do YOU
think?"
think that if the hogs have
plenty of rat that no stage of the
moon can rob them of anv,
The amount of lard depends en-
tlrely on the condition of the
hog, and the state of the moon
has nothing to do with it. Get
the hogs into good condition
and Kill them when the weather
suits, without any attention to
the moon, for if the fat is there,
Inc moon cannot make it any
less. The feeding has more TO
40 with it than the moon II is
time tha, the intelligent men
were getting rid of these old
SuperStitiOns.
The Pageland journal. [volume] (Pageland, S.C.) 1911-1978, 1916-12-20
Zeb Vance Fought Monroe
Chinches

Monroe Journal.
Bryan's visit to Monroe caus,
ed IN oldtimer to recall an IN
teresting conversation he over
heard nearly forty years ago be
tween Zeb Vance and the late
Bill Trctt, who kept the old no
tel which used to stand on the
entire site now occupied by the
Loan & Trust building. Vance
had spent the night in the hotel,
and on descending to the office
next morning, he was met with
sollcltouS enquiries from his
host regarding the manner in
which he slept during the night.
Didn't sleep much," respond
ed North Cardinals War Gov.
ernor, who was always willing
and ready to tell some wagg1sh
tale.
"What was the matter?" asked
his host in an an anxious tone.
THE chinch bugs were on a
raid in my !oom," retaliated the
Governor, Il fought them sim
gle handed until midnight. when
l went after some reinforce.
ments. | got a gallon of molass
es and poured it IN circle
around my bed. Thinking I
was firmly entrenched from the
enemy, | fell asleep. But along
about two o'clock in the morn
ing was disturbed by them
agYlh. They had ouI maneuv:
ere@ me by climbing up the
wallis and dropping on my bed
from the ceiling"
The Pageland journal. [volume] (Pageland, S.C.) 1911-1978, 1916-12-20
Germany Offers to Make
Peace

New York, Dec. 13.-It was
learned in this country Yesterday
that Germany had submitted
certain terms of peace and while
no official account of these
@gms have been received vet,
pllowing, it is claimed this
Fning, is the substance of the
proposals made TO the Allies by
Germany:
For the complete restoration
of Belgium.
For the evacuation by Ger.
many of all territory captured in
Northern France during the
progress of the war.
For the establishment of Pc.
land and Lithuania as independ-
ent Kingdoms.
I For the retention. ofsSerbia by
Austria Hungary, and the resto-
ration to Bulgaria ofFall territory
lost by that country in the sec
ond Balkan war.
For the restoration to Austria
OF territory captured by Italy in
the nelghborhood of the Adriat-
ic sea.
For the restoration to Ger.
many of all her calonial posses
sions IN Africa, the far east and
other parts of the globe.
For the retention of CONSTANT.
nople by Turkey.
This information was obtained
todaYsfrom an unsliestionable
authority close 10 the German
embassy.
Observation-Disclosures officials
who have kept fully advised ol
the situation, the terms laid
down represent The united DOW.
er OF all the central powers and
were drawn up after full ex.
changes of view between the
Teutonic capitals.
The Pageland journal. [volume] (Pageland, S.C.) 1911-1978, 1916-12-20
SLIGO per year
Peace Note Fixes Terms Saws
Teuton Diplomatist

Berlin, Dec II, via NIvviIlv
Some sections Of The tor,,,9
press and especially ncwspap.r.
in hostile countries" saws IN.
Overseas News Agency, .hly
ing declared that the C.nlr.f
Powers ought to have aIIg,
definite peace proposals to thcl
peace offer, the Overseas Agcu
cy asked a distinguished < German
diplomatist for his opinion or
this point. His answer was.
The German note Eaten,
Governments contains 4 yer
definite communication as 10 lh,.
spirit of the peace conditions
which the Central Powers would
bring to the propose negotiations
1.-The Central Powers base
these proposals on the Conyic.
ton that their own rights and
just claims today are not in con
trldictlon 10 the rights of other
Nations. In addition, the Cen
trail Powers declare they do not
want to annihilate or destroy
anybody and that the peace pro-
posals will be of such nature
as TO guarantee the establish
ment of a lasting peace.
The Pageland journal. [volume] (Pageland, S.C.) 1911-1978, 1916-12-20

Jim Smith was notoriously
slow pay. He owed quite a bill
ut the grocery for pork. One
day, as his credit was becoming
strained, he walked calmly into
the grocery and said: MIR. Black,
| want 10 pay you for the pork l
have had, and l want some
more"
Certainly" said the delighted
proprietor; as he hastened to
wait on his customer.
Taking the package of pork,
Jim Smith started to go.
wait a minute" said the pro-
prietor 81 thought you wanted
to pay for the pork"
Il do" remarked Jim, as he
resumed his homeward wa,
but Can't."-Ex.