davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1916-01-04

Tho View Taars Drngrain given IL
die (4peri ginllse Silnitas iEei'lnnn
vas attended by iiInut; TbD pet'nle anu
vas des,,Hl-sn Il Ica.ir success bH Ill.
Tie chief musical feature vas Tie
callIitsL The -.nDe n r.la Wnr'u.
by Si,:1nesHsft given Dv u chorus dr
;iDnrlt LuD VOICES let bv Elmer z.
Thvue- supervisor IT music III rsie
5kuviiesa,l- Madison ss.,1nnls, iIld ic~
tompaslieu bv rnwna's ORCHESTRA. Tie
DrnE-siln. uDenett With riln snlE ~
cnur,ls int audience. OH C1me AL
Pa 5'a.t.if1l,.' Rev. George Merriam.
viln Drnsided IT the Meeting, Glen
I,,ad the beaur3fell DHss;lHa IT 's'n7D'-
rllra descriptive N THE -44lgais Ae'ss-
si,re II The blrf2l nr r.le 5iisHuhr III
1a,.lienesn ant affs.rast prayer. Mrs.
Eta Sasva,9g Gr1dleN t.leil railuefaa
beautiful snnG, iItar WHICH KEY
ClH..,as K ncttillIner raid L paper IN
The 5-ult1,l, az Music Mss E.ltl
(.f.,a,1svnnn sang tie snIn pa.r- 1T ne
,a,,ri.a. Rev q. q. Hc,siaslliin gave
4, Irte, ..aiia:mus talk l,pnn r.in GIFTS
II ne Mag: ~ t.1e infant 1aNhlf 'i.lu
Tie nea,.ng e.nsat WITH die shng All
E7,i.l r.le Cover III ,!i..;iis &isne anu
die leut.tiGt.un ~ al' Merriam.
3xuxiieuan's -aar:is ~ fHfi
saKavliegau turing Tie past Ea.ig' lHs
l,t,t La deaths Fourteen rom iDnp-
e.F Anu silncx pneumonia IL, 1tsi-'r
rs.,l,lb,e = t.lbercuiusis II tilr iunEs
; s;.u:lrss ti.sf.ass, .;i.ica,' ) Cunnr
4. aid taa . ry,pnu,t bever ); Da1'-
i.vsis v'lunp,nH aaug.l . lltarnn~
ollie irridenr ]. t1'nm l'if1ls I, trh"n-
rg d.. 1r1masna 1n,snnlnE L i.ld.
1,nuug arl,e,,s -yvn II unk.lu'vl c:illse
Vie learns inc,utfetf six war ~. MIS-
Efue,;a Yilr o. and t-a3''rran =. Sn,'-
y, a. die oldest rasidpnrs III r.le
avn .. war ~. - iun, n Yai4's II
az, ana u i"er ii genrs II lga;
,,,r.,. ~ Z: ,ya,' "a !. uVar ~.
-r1,p opr,,as,, G9+l.ld viii 1uin ia M
,l,a! nearillsr Thursday iIt.ruunn II
In. .,7,,.~n ,a..nrs aEld a mi iEte,n,.-
i.lce Is ca.;ilest.nt.
:.ns.'Y Ss'1isirY
H,3,.t E,nrr'r Vt Siiawieaall illa
Miss ern+a-cr :. E7'rpnY IT Madison
ware rnal'"'en N so 1sit1lr'saF eve
n!n;E at The 3aft,a.lY Dnl'aHlhara ."
Rev C1,..D'aa lfs.r-,a.n. EHe iulD,e ctlH
se,,ufcs, pas Isa.f. r',a compile Na1a 1t
r,nti,ai ~ M iz1.i Ms. E-ir1iH L.
g3,,,,ct,~r II 1!na ravvI. M. 3rHpiiN ie-
il:g | 1rnrtle,. II Ctie };r'tte Afl' t-intrF
IL lie son II Mrs.. lila q. .1le''T ~
aiIivlrgIl iltt j. tnnlleGr4tit VII
-.tcj,.rr.s gaI1.ra. 'T'le lr;ote II L nurse
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1916-01-04

". n. Smith yesIr ru Madison Ap1-
(ts4ss ON business fnr rtff. day
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1916-01-04

Ahcsr- half ter .. whatehare IS es-
tanned srosrl oEs whale. it's value heizx.
roughly. $zHG.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1916-01-04
MADISON
Funeral Sunday IT sie Late ET'
srsat NJ Eurtsmaa-BrsAsn
wassrwn eas Closes the En-
tire T. 4 " Plant

VIA t,,1erag .,.,.v:,..a IL EuerHr1 IL
siironnf vF.ra err,tiIer.t By Rev. ~ II
Ham @GGn az a.s JaI. home III E14';i4tt
srl,anr AZ e &c sunday l1tlY'lac,'. III
si.i!. s1r,im l3,tga. T.. q. y p, net II
r,e, iaIL aI.t irEstrt.t.,t -t:e ser-tcss i, L
Body and me {. %. %, g BURIAL 4erH>A:t.
va, ra;i4:.
NJ 5urhaaA VII CORN II liza -nwl n
EreeI,1:ln I.fY j. GS-9, az. VIII he
Yt.,,..u,sc Of Il tll.,!.T ct -ti-se ei,il,:s'an
bcrn x. 1.raIrli;ii VI md sarah CGc-l4.
R.,r.anH Ea i11.sr,,.s.,. TIE distract
scnccis md Later rrl,.al.I1ed trr2'I C!,..
Wv Ptr-llrt Fl q, acnaoL A-tl.r 1r..,a.:i.-
ing ti5r Jaw farms NJ 6'lriaanh .rlCar'-t'
the E'.rr..I.Ert.n Normal sr.i,.ci gradual
ing H. t.Ag 1T The sst.t Ut LIS Gi.lsa.
Att.r graduation lie tlIrr,s,i us er,1Jra H.
-s,lI.ou 10 us:ith1ag Il, gra111.lar LIZ. 14.En
Schools Fog iva years he -.BQggst at
5T.igst.ir- Il. also cal2sEa1 aevar.bI G.=l.l-1.:
AZ e.aagis New Portland l.c. New V...s.-
yard
In TIA Mr g11r'aanit c:lr-s 70 " Ats
and ,,lrri,.t.sett r1+ EErl;Ea mi rgPn4r
sii1p husineas 81, =. ". oaiAar. Aa,t L 1T
tie Earar hoUgaE rne FtjI-1n E;,.se sG.i,,e
ard a1ore,. Lis G11siTeaa III Gh.iE pGtca.
arr. csnver-s6 Il lnt,a MZdiacn's Erac
garage. By 1.ilr an,5 y.E'r,.ri,r t..:lIl17.s ha.
established 4 E.rga a.,t z1.cra4atl1I olzsi--
nsaa, Ard vas well known Throughout
titia sertisc. NsVsr II r7i1EzsI h.s;LIELl r
tss fall Ct tlIt Lie b.scau1ss lfE1ictaG wiz
tuberculosis. and was eslcilet5 90 LIS Bed
almost at the drs-. He par-i.llIY retav-
sret ard sn1arsti Ffsssrur z;infrar;1.1r1. re-
-:aintng 1asre s7r .sEr months
FIFE was married IN Tune a-a, TO MEsss
Susie Clark Of North Anss1a. R.s:sit,ss TIE
widow ens. daughter. Miss Elsie ss9r-
hank the mother. and ore bru1ke. ". q.
EsErhanIs, both Ct New Portland. an.t
ars. sister, Mrs. L. J. Hsrscr- Of Efalraw-
eli, survive Nr. Burbank WIS Il r-s.---
hsr At Lernen Stream lodge, L % O =
Of Nsw Portland The fn-s-nent vas
n Sunset esrnetsrF At Worth A1ss1-
4 special azeeeIng fer Een WIS held at
P " Sunday IN the Pastlue Moving
Picture thsatsrt rhs address, being given
by Rs~- C. W. EIr1veod D D. Of scg-
ton and superintendent OF the Crtrrsusaa
Home for girls The theme Of .,s ai-
dress was THE 'EeE Ch9vaIry-~ srntay
erenIax Mr. ETliaEued spoke At a ans,-.
ssrvTce IN the Frss Ez psasr efaurch.
Theme The Modern Social Er-rh1sss--
Owing TO the breaking @. L varsrEha.I
tn e-tl-s plant Of the HoIIinrswrrrh L
W.EtneF Co. In this place ss SHUT GOWN
A crew ct raETIvrixhss from warsrvs,ts
arrived Monday forenoon to rspafr sne
damage and it IL expected the unsu win
Dc running as usual IN another week
MIN Appleton Wood who has aesa car
ing for E H. Burbank drrtn< his -sc.r.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1916-01-04

Porn a We'll " .si.er ~ Mss Mayer
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1916-01-04
3au,~,,euars -aar:,s m t4fE

Vhe anrtlalv G.sl.ld viii llntn ~ M
l,lla! r1narin.r Thursday iITaI'nuHn II
r.ln .nllrrr Da.'!nrs AID 4 mi iT!s'nt'-
ilce Is csailest...t.
The Southern herald., 1916-06-05

blue and white polka dotted SILK or Oh
green satin piped with white.
Coats of shepherd checks are some
times trimmed with black satin in
hands at the foot, and the collars and
cuffs are also Of satin. Little coats of
light blue silk poplin are shocked on
either side Of the front and in the cen
ter OF the back The blue collar and
cuffs are embroidered in white. Coats
have girdles of ribbon tied loosely
around the waist, ending in a loose
knot on the side. A little coat OF two
toned corduroy in brown and white is
made with a hared skirt, Diped at the
waist line and on the collar and cuffs.
Black and white and blue and white
corduroy are also seen.
The little MILDLY dresses, the Rus
sian blouse, the one-piece dress Joined
with a belt, the coat and norfolk styles
and the little suspender dresses worn
with guimpes, as well as the short
WASTED effects, are all seen in attrac'
tive assortments. Some dresses hang
in loose lines from the shoulders, and
are trimmed with shocking.
The Southern herald., 1916-06-05
Copies Of Their Elders.

Suits for little girls are after the
models shown for women. The skirts
have considerable fullness and the
coats are inclined to ripple below the
waist line. Some very attractive suits
for children are made with skirts Of
broken checks and coats Of serge in
solid color. They have suspenders at
tached to the skirt, or are finished
with belt. The coats, as a rule, are
loose and belted, and of hip length.
Belts which enclrcle the waist, or belt
ed back styles with pockets on either
the skirt or coat, and buttons fasten-
ing the front OF the skirt, are especial
ly good looking.
Children's skirts are usually cut cir
cular and have considerable fare at
the foot, fitting fairly close over the
hips. The coats are finished with 8
coat collar and lapels, and some are
made in norfolk styles.
There are many variations In trim,
mings. Buttons are used profusely
and in novel ways. A number Of suits
In solid color have collar and cuffs oi
The Southern herald., 1916-06-05
Fashion Hints.

A halfseason fashion is the tulle-
crowned hat, with brims of faille rib
bon.
A chic hat is four-cornered, with
two white wings crossed on the crown.
Summer frocks for gardening have
ribbon lacing instead of buttons.
With frilly white dresses this sum
mer the proper footwear will be white
Never has the large cloak been so
important as at the present moment.
Almond-green is one of the fascinat
ing shades.
Handkerchiefs are being shown in
Haunting, brilliant colors.
One of the most popular sleeves is
the bell effect.
Woolen voile is likely to be a q.
vorite this spring.
Linen dresses will be trimmed with
rickrack braid.
Lavallieres with a cameo pendant
are sometimes seen.
The gayest of awning stripes are
not too gay for skirts.
The new evening gown should be
short and very bouffant.
Bodices inclined to be skinny have
ample sleeves.
Plain gold bracelets are still enjoy
ing a fair amount of popularity.
The Southern herald., 1916-06-05

that it is destined to contain. For
making it, two pieces of stiff card
board must be cut in the shape Of
heart, one Just a trife smaller than
the other. These cards are covered
with silk, and on the front of the
smaller card a loop of satin ribbon,
edged with silk cord, is sewn for hold
ing the scissors. Round the edge a
simple design consisting of tiny leaves
is embroidered with silk of various
shades of green. The two cards are
Joined together with band Of satin
ribbon and the space between them
well filled with cotton wool. The
edges are finished off with a fine silk
cord.
For suspending this decorative lit
tie article from a nail in the wall, a
loop of broad satin ribbon with a bow
at the top matching in color the silk
cord is sewn on at the back.
The Southern herald., 1916-06-05
SKIRTS and SLEEVES
FASHIONS WHlMs ARE NOT BE.
ING sLAVlsHLY FOLLOWED.
Best Dressed Women Have Developed
Ideas Of Their Own, TO Which They
Seem Determined to Cling
Froek for Small Girl.

Complicated skirts are not looked
upon with so much disfavor by fash
ionable women for the evening as
they are for the street, but even in
the field where elaborate dressing is
most observed there is a tendency to
disregard the edict for hutings and
rufles and plaitings and loopings.
The exquisite type Of drapery with
long lines that is supposed to belong
to Calllot is still liked the best by
women who dress we'll, and wherever
the Caillot sisters have departed from
this in their new skirts they have
failed. Many Of their skirts, which
have yielded to the supposed demand
for horizontal drapery, are amazingly
commonplace, considering the source
from which they sprang. If one did
not have the assurance of those who
saw these gowns in their original
habitat on the Rue Taltbout, one
would say that some American de-
signer was jesting with the public.
All Of which may go to prove that a
clothes designer, like an actress, had
far better stick to the role in which
once came success and money.
Many Of the best Premet skirts are
also ugly, so, If you are in the habit
of letting great labels influence your
choice of clothes, be advised that that
can be we'll disregarded this season.
There has been no adoption in eve
ming skirts to any extent, of the hoops
that keep the drapery out from the
hips, like baskets across a donkey's
back; but there is more of the hip
drapery on evening skirts than on
street skirts. What one must guard
against is a ragged outline which has
no character to it. Whatever else
you do, sharpen the drapery so that
1t appears to be worked out to a
definite aim and does not give the ap-
pearance of being accidental, and in
cidental to the gown itself. In other
words, the drapery should be sharp
and pert, a bit rakish and insolent; if
1t doesn't swagger, 1t is failure.
The same thing may be said ot
sleeves as of skirts; they are in fiux
Today, they reach the wrist; tomor
row, they may not reach the elbow
Today, everyone talks Of their full
ness; tomorrow they may be Eliza
bethan with an enormous puff at the
shoulders.
From a casual glance at the new
sleeves. It wouldsappear that the bal
The Southern herald., 1916-06-05
gAsY EoR &c PRoFEssoR.

And now" said the professor. as
the regular class exercises we're I'M
ished. 'is there any question any OF
the young ladies would like to ask"
How is It. professor" asked the
Hiuffy-haired maiden at the pedal ex'
tremity Of the feminine bunch, that
Father Time Is always represented as
being bald headed"
That is easily explained" the learned
one replied. 80 many young young
people during their school days grasp
Time By the forelock in trying to get
away from the foot Of the class that
his hair has all been pulled out. See"
And the girl at the foot said never
a word in reply.
The Southern herald., 1916-06-05
Straw Trims Serne.

Straw trims serge costumes. That
is what renowned French clothes
artistic has evolved in the way Of nov
elites for this season. The straw,
heavily plated, is applied as three
inch bands to the bottom of skirts
and to form outstanding collars. Espe-
cially stunning is a suit in blue serge
garnished with half inch wide patent
leather bands finished with still mar
rover straw edgings Does the straw
chip away, shatter or otherwise disln-
tegrate! Assuredly not. Though
heavy, It is flexible. Neither does the
patent leather with which at times It
is mingled become rusty and lend q
shabby appearance to the costume.
The Southern herald., 1916-06-05

and the location Of the one-half inch
holes for the dowels, which should
extend entirely through the pieces.
Coat the ends Of the dowels with glue.
and fasten them with finishing nails
driven through the edges Of A and d.
Fig. 4 shows a unique rack for dish
towels, with the back board so hinged
that, when the towels hung upon them
have dried and been put away, the
arms may be dropped out Of the way
as In Fig. 5.
Fig. 6 shows the dimensions for
board A, Fig. the dimensions for
board B, and Fig. the length Of the
broomhandle arms G. The holes in
board B must be of the exact diameter
of the broomhandles. Coat the ends
Of the arms with glue. and drive a nail
through the edge of board B into
each.
One pair of hinges is sufficient for
hinging board B to A. They should
be screwed to the edges as shown at
D Gig. 81. Screw eyes E and F Gig
The Southern herald., 1916-06-05

S HANDICRAFT FOR BOYS AND GIRLS ;
& By
A NEELY HALL and DOROTHY PERKINS
sr gsS5
CORK TOYS.
| (Copyright BY a Neey aaIl

If you will save the cork from eyerV
empty bottle before 1t is thrown ON,
or disposed Of to the ragman, Won
will soon have enough shapes apd
sizes to provide an afternoons fun
Of toymaking. II you do not want
to wait until enough corks have aeon.
mulated by this means. you can NJ
what you will need at drug store
In addition to cOrks. you must have
some cardboard, some worsted. beads
toothpicks, burnt matches, pins and
glue. For cutting the corks use 4
very sharp knife.
The horse Gig. u has body made
of two tapered corks, with the small
ends glued together. Use the pat
tern in Fig. for the head, and glue
this in a slot cut across the end Of
the body. The legs may be toothpICks
or matches; glue them into holes III
The Southern herald., 1916-06-05

81 are provided for pin H to slip
through when the arms have been
raised, to hold them in that position
Gig. ~.
Screw one screw eye into the edge
Of board B (E, Fig. 81, and two screw
eyes into board A IF, Fig 81, in the
right positions so when the arms are
raised screw eye E will come between
screw eyes F. Screw eyes G (Figs. 4
and 81 are provided for hangers.
The purpose of the bread-slicing
board Zig. 81 is to make 1t easy to
slice loaf Of bread so each slice is
Of equal thickness on all edges.
Fig. 10 shows the dimensions for
base A, and Fig. II the dimensions for
uprights B. Block C will keep up
The Southern herald., 1916-06-05
Beads on Wrist Baus.

The chic wrist bag Of the hour car
ries more or less beads. The balloon
shapes in bags are called the last
cry" although they are a revival Of
an old fashion, and many Of these re-
vivals have handles wholly or partial.
ly in beads. One model frequently
developed in white and dark checked
faille with appliqued motifs in dark
velvet, has handle Of dark she'll beads
which is repeated in a short chain de.
pending partly across the bags base.
A second model in plain faille has a
handle combining the silk and short
strings Of blonde shell beads.
The Southern herald., 1916-06-05

Little girls froek designed by Jeanne
Laurin. cerise silk with little lace
gulmpe. The bonnet Is Of the silk to
match the dress.
loon and the bishop sleeves are the
proper ones; and yet, il you look
clearly, with a vision enlarged by
prophecy, you can see a new kind Of
sleeve foreshadowed-th one that
flares over the knuckles, hugs the arm
within four inches Of the top and then
flares into a huge, slashed puff. This
sleeve belongs to Sir Walter Raleigh;
so does that new cartridge plated ruff
made of white organdie, standing out
from the neck, and so does the care
less gay cape flung back from the
shoulders.
Copyright, 1916 by the Mcclure Newspa-
per syndlcate)
The Southern herald., 1916-06-05

Zig. 81 sticks upon the end Of the
toothpick neck, and the toothpick legs
have beads glued upon their ends.
The duck Gig. 81 is one Of the
many floating toys which can be made
Fig. 10 shows the head and neck, FIG
II the tail, and Fig IL the keel fas
tened to the under side of the bOdy
to prevent upsetting. The keel should
be of cardboard coated with parafhn'
Tapering corks make splendid pos
for toy plants for a doll house (flg
15), and plants can be made of papa
or pieces of artificial ferns.
If you have never made cork 1aye
lin to toss at a target, you have misseO
lots Of fun. Fig. 16 shows how %
The Southern herald., 1916-06-05

the cork body. The tail Is made Of
several strands of worsted tied to q
pin Gig. 81, which is stuck into the
body.
The funny little porcuplne Zig. q
has tapered cork body Gig. 81,
toothpick legs. a cardboard head
Zig. g., and toothpick quilts.
Because cork birds and animals are
funny creatures at best, 1t is proper to
devise varieties other than those
found in ZOOS. Fig. shows a pe
culiar specimen. Isn't he a dandy
with his ornamental neck? Five
glass beads strung upon toothpIck
form the neck, the cardboard head
The Southern herald., 1916-06-05
Practically Put.

This orator says the government
safeguards pigs better than 1t does
children"
well, why not?" asked the man
with ferret eyes.
That's monstrous."
"0h, don't know. Pigs are an as
set. Children are a liability"
The Southern herald., 1916-06-05

rights B the right distance apart for
the slot for the bread knife. Nail up
rights B in place, then slip a saw
through the slots, and cut a small
groove in base A ID, Figs. 8 and 11) so
the knife will cut through the bottom
bread crust easily.
Strip 3 Gig. % is nailed to the far
edge Of base A, to push the bread
against when cutting, and strip F
Gig. 81 fits between uprights B, on
the end Of base A, and should be OF
the proper width so there will be ex.
actly fiye-sixteenths Of an inch space
between Ita inside edge and slot D.
The Southern herald., 1916-06-05
Wonder How He Knew.

"1n writing the short story" said
the editor to the literary aspirant, you
should always emulate the pawn
broker"
'In what way7" asked the aspiring
one.
Never permit the interest to las"
replied the editor
The Southern herald., 1916-06-05
Scissors AIwaYs at Hand.

One Of those dainty and useful lit
tie articles that would be sure to prove
attractive and sell well in a bazar or
would make a very acceptable little
gift is shown in our sketch.
To a certain extent the size will be
determined by the size of the scissors
The Southern herald., 1916-06-05
Canine Wisdom.

VIII your dog bite?" asked the
transforming comedian.
No" replied the village innkeeper'
"he won't bite people"
Just then the self-confessed actor
let out a howl as the canine got a
strangle hold on his leg.
But" continued the landlord. he'll
bite a ham any old day"
The Southern herald., 1916-06-05
Steak With Truffles.

THE horse has been supplanted by
the automobile"
Yes, to a great extent. But the
horse has got on the menu card
now, and don't see how the automo-
bile is ever going to supplant him
there"
The Southern herald., 1916-06-05
Hin Msrlts.

we object to the young man who
is courting our daughter because he
Is a shoemaker"
why, a shoemaker is the best sort
OF man, because he is usually whole
soled and well heeled."
The Southern herald., 1916-06-05
HANDY THINGS TO MAKE FOR
MOTHER.

For the sleeve board Gig. u you
will require wood three-quarters OF
one inch thick, out of which to cut
pieces A and B Gigs. and 81, and a
carpenters "dovel" stick about two
feet long from which to cut four
pieces Ave inches long for connecting
A and B. Figs. 2 and 3 show the meas
urements for cutting pieces A and b.
The Southern herald., 1916-06-05
SUPERIOR Wisdom.

What is that ruddy glow in the
sky?" asked the visitor.
That" replied the old resident, rs
a furnace making a run"
Come now. None of your spoohng.
happen to know that your bally fur.
naces are not on wheels"
The Southern herald., 1916-06-05

Il had a dreadful nightmare last
night"
Tell me about It"
II dreamed I was trying to dodge 3
cross-eyed woman who was driving =
motor car"
The Southern herald., 1916-06-05
Hluh Art.

Here is a picture" said Neurich.
who has made his pile in munitions,
that l paid ten thousand dollars for
in Paris"
You don't say!" exclaimed his
friend from the tall grass district.
''Why, the frame must be solid gold"
The Southern herald., 1916-06-05

1T certainly is curious"
What is?"
"DubwaiteIs attitude toward the
play"
"WelI?"
He actually praises the perform
ance."
Still, don't understand"
And he came in on a pass"
The Southern herald., 1916-06-05
Easier

Don't you want to be a leader of
the people?"
It's hard work to be a real leader"
commented Senator Sorghum. It's
usually easier to get along by jollying
the crowd"
The Southern herald., 1916-06-05

You said you would have a walk
over"
That's what l thought" answered
the defeated candidate, ruefully. Il
had it. all right, but not in the way
/ expected"
"Yes?"
The entire field walked over me-"
The Southern herald., 1916-06-05

Walter, are you insane? What do
you mean by bringing me dish OF
peanuts when l am nearly famished?"
Pardon me, sir; but when you came
in you said you had the appetite of ar
elephant, so this is what l thought
would just suit you"
The Southern herald., 1916-06-05
A Careful Man.

Il never saw pan SO afraid Of
catching cold as Tompkins is"
rs he really?"
Il should say so. Why, I've heard
that whenever he takes bath he
stops up all the holes in the sponge
for fear Of draft"
The Southern herald., 1916-06-05

De Quill haven't seen anything in
the papers lately about Kicker, the
great football player Of few seasons
ago. Is he dead?
De Whiz-Dead? No. He's more
terrible than ever; he drives racing
automobile now.
The Southern herald., 1916-06-05
Pertinent Query.

There's a man who never finds
fault"
Yes" replied Miss Cayenne; but
is 1t because he is patient and for.
bearing, or because he is too indolent
to notice what is going on?"
The Southern herald., 1916-06-05

Old Lady Ito drunken beggar)-
Aren't you ashamed to ask for alms3
Beggar-Yesh'm, but l only (hic) do
It when I'm (hic) full an can't work at
me (hic) trade.
Old Lady-What is your trade?
Beggar-I'm q thic) burglar. ma'am.
The Southern herald., 1916-06-05
No Demand for II.

There are all kinds Of correspond
erce schools nowadays"
Quite true, but as long as there is
a vacant lot left in the land, there
won't be much inducement for any
body to open a correspondence school
OF baseball"
The Southern herald., 1916-06-05

Myer-Who is the man across the
way with the gold medal on his coatI
Gyer-Oh, that's speeder. He holds
the gasoline record.
Myer-Gasoline record!
Gyer-Yes; ran over thirteen people
with his gasoline buggy in one after
noon.
The Southern herald., 1916-06-05
lmposslble Feat.

Irate Father-Dont think. young
man. you can walk into this house
and hang up your hat
Tlmid suitor-I know cant sir.
You're sitting On 4
The Southern herald., 1916-06-05
lta Source.

Mrs. Gaddy-Mrs Richly has so
much embonpoint.
Mrs. Comeup-And l bet she brags
she imported it like everything else
she has. from Paris.