Norwich bulletin., 1916-08-15

"GIoom!" said the man from Wood lawn as he surveyed his friend from
 Hyde Park. Gloom ten feet thick and mile wide surrounds you as 8 visible aura! Who brought bad news from Ghent to Aix?"
 T don't know" said the Hyde Park man between his teeth. Believe me, if 1 did there wouldn't be enough of him left to sweep up! He's the person who first put efficiency into the dic-
 tiOnary! Look at me! I may not be here tOnorrow-the human soul has it's breaking point, and I can feel mine coming!
 The trouble is," he went on, that Imogene has introduced efficiency in- to our home. She came to me with tears in her eyes some time ago and sobbed out that she was humiliated to realize how she had been wasting my money which I toiled so hard to earn, but that she had seen the light and would do better in the future. was somewhat surprised and so in formed her. I told her that I always had been impressed with her ability to bite pennies in two and to make a delicious hash out of a beef bone and two green peppers and had even bet no other woman on earth could accomplish such leger- -demain-but she shook her head mOurnfuIIy and said l didn't understand.
 Tt was not alone the grocery bills that she had in mind. Possibly she said l did not realize that wandering aimlessly around the house carrying things one by one instead of collecting everything one wanted upstairs and taking 1t there at once wore out a pair of shoes exactly twice as fast as they should wear out! Maybe it had never been borne in upon me, she continued, that if 8, woman used a broom in . STE6nninSy the motion three tiraes as many waists in a year as though she had employed an electric cleaner. Of course, Imokene hires her cleaner. Of course, IrOgene hires her she pointed out, the principle was the same. If it happened that she had
 to do the cleaning I would have to pay for the waists.
 Tt was here that I broke in and tried to sOothe Imogene. told her it
 was extremely nice of her to be so concerned. but that the bills were most moderate and were not worrying me at all. Her expression of mortified pain paralyzed my flow of language however. She said in Q, hushed voice that. if everybody went on that theory the human race would be ruined in no time. We were our brothers keeper and her own example might prove of | lasting benefit or a terrible tragedy to any one who looked on. She added 1 that she was going to begin right away putting principles of efficiency to work Well, when I started to dress for a banquet that night in a hurry and jerked open g. bureau drawer for a 1 dress shirt I grabbed instead my ja- janlas. The drawer was full to the | brim with Dajamas, and though l searched frantically I could not find any dress shirts. Everything seemed upset. A camera and opera glasses were where I usually keep handker- | chiefs, and I found my socks in the place formerly devoted to collars. When InOgene came home from her mothers, where she had gone for din- ! ner, she found my Cheery face peeDing 1 out from perfect mound of apparel 1 To my wild shouts as to where she l had hidden the missing dress shirts | the lack of which had ruined my eve ming, Inogene looked annoyed and fn- l dignant. She said it was a poor way ! to repay her devotion, destroying ali | the careful work of a IabOrious day | but. thank heaven, she had her chart
 and it would not be so hard to replace l things.
 Dress shirts? Why, Henry! Al, ! the dress shirts were in the top drawer i of the bathroom, where the sheets