The Washington herald., 1916-10-13
Getting Rid Of Shyness.
BY OHIsoN SWEET MARDEN,


celebrated japanese psychologist who had
made thorough study of shyness and its causes
was asked to take under his care and cure the
son of nobleman of that defect, which made
him ridiculous and caused him great suffering.
The young was bashful that he could
scarcely convey food to his mouth in the pres
ence of guest, and would often drop his chop
sticks or whatever he was eating with, together
with his food if any one happened to look at
him. 1t was positively painful to him to meet
people or to associate with them in any way.
The psychologist began his treatment by doing
everything in, his power to gain his pupils conf
dence and to put him at his He intro
duced him to his friends and cultivated friendly,
even a chummy, relationship with the boy, SO as
70 make him forget his defect and give him the
greatest freedom for self-expression both in his
studies and in his play.
Gradually, without being obtrusive, he began
to refer to his pupils bashfulness and assured
him that his trembling, his confusion, his stam-
mering, and his pain at meeting people had no
real cause except in his imagination and there
fore could easily be overcome, if he would only
think and have better opinion of himself
He endeavored to convince him Of his real abil-
ty and then showed him how his foolish shy
ness would cripple his whole career by robbng
him of initiative, courage, independence, all the
ments
At first it was very difficult for the youth to
make himself do the things he had always shrunk
from, but he persisted and gradually gained more
case and lost much of the awkwardness caused
| by embarrassment. He found himself more and
more willing to converse, and was conscious OF
greater freedom in his movements, his thought
and expression. This encouraged him greatly
and before many months he had almost COM
plctely overcome the handicap which had threat
cned to ruin his whole career, to say nothing OF
his constant frightful suffering.
Shy people are constantly misunderstood and
undcrestmated because their real selves never
allowed expression. They are so afraid that 9TH
ers weighing and measuring them in the bal
ance and finding them wanting that whenever
they they FLOCK by themselves" as the
Irshman put it, Their shrinking self-effacing
apologetc attitude is fatal to their efficiency as
we'll their comfort and happiness. If instead
of avoiding others they would mix freely in
society and undertake responsibility at every
opportunity. matter how it might pain them
or how every nerve might shrink from human
contact; if they would stop staying alone in cor
ners at receptions and in drawing rooms, if they
would cease worrying about their appearance
and manner, and would force themselves into
the great human current, they would soon en-
tirely overcome their self-consciousness.
Why not sit down by yourself and take &C
count of the things you are missing, the doors
that closed to you, the things you are barred
from because Of your timidity, your hinderng
bashfulnesso Try it, and then have a good
heartto-heart talk with yourself. Say. 81 don't
propose to make a daub of what the Greater in
tended for masterpiece just because of this
sensitiveness which l have been encouraging all
these years | am going to overcome it. l am
going to push to the front, | am going to force
myself into the van, no matter how it pains me
no matter if l do seem forward and bold.
know that it is the only remedy for my defect
am going to show people that not the
failure, the nobody the defective, deficient per
son they take for"
When timid, bashfu, retiring men and women
claim their kinship with the Supreme Being they
feel reinforced, buttressed with a mysterious in
ward feeling of peace, of harmony, sense that
they are not doing their work alone, but that
they have tapped illimitable power. They no
longer feel that they separate units, puppets
to be tossed about by cruel fate with simply a
gambling chance at life instead of certainty. All
fear vanishes, and they become poised natural
independent masters of themselves, partakers OF
infinite power