Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1916-07-27
CM0RDS A ND'
ID I S c O II ID S

u ~ U LIS ~ ~
THE National Dental association,
in session at Louisville, is agreed that
many of the troubles of the human
family originate in the mouth. NOT
necessarily in the teeth, either.
81 DON'T want to be interviewed"
said Mrs. w. X. Vanderbilt to Jrib-
une reporter while passing through
Chicago the other day, "and whatever
you write make it just as short as you
can" Then she proceeded to reel on
a string of tattle that would have filled
a column at least. She must nave
been disappointed when she saw that
the reporter did succeed in boring
her story down to quarter column"
Pretty good treatment even for Mrs.
Vanderbilt in these days OF soaring
print paper prices. "Did Mrs. Wander
bilt have any special program for her
two hours stay in Chicago" quizzed
tho reporter. "OnIy to get cleaned
up,7 she said, laughing. The news
gatherer might have told her that the
quickest way to get cleaned in Chi
cagO would be for her TO visit Haw-
thOrne race track.
IF we are to believe the honeymoon
itineraries of all the summer newly
weds Atlantic City must be crowded
for hotel accommodations.
SEVERAL Indiana towns are claim
ing the body of James WhitcOmb Riley,
which merely goes to illustrate the
depth of the love of the home folks
for the great singer. This recalls the
TNIz a A111
vaudeville, although it carries a re-
verse sentiment. You know" said
Charley, two cities in New York are
in a bitter fight over where 1 was
born. Albany says l was born in
Schenectady and Schenectady declares l
was born in Albany"
The Curse of knowledge.
"Earache," wrote Harry in his
physiology examination, comes from
bits of information getting inside the
ear tubes"
PRESIDENT Wilson and wife were
soused in z rain storm in Washington
the other afternoon. Here is a fine
opening for the publicity department
of the republican national committee.
It can charge that the president hasn't
sense enough to come in out of the
rain. That ought to score a big hit
over the country among those who
are not particularly crazy about the
occupant of the White house. Then,
besides, it would serve as filler these
days when the publicity department
is having such a difficult time digging
up mean things to say in print about
the president
UNIVERSITY of Chicago goods are
reported to have screamed when they
saw two little boys in their bearSkinS
bathing in the campus fountain. The
boys must have splaShed water on the
girls.
PATIENTS at the Elgin state hos
pital have taken to playing golf and
many are said to have become adept
at the game. There is hope of some
of them recovering their missing men
tai links.
THE Stock Yards Lowden club has
been formed in Chicago. 1t is reputed
to be one of the strongest political
clubs in the city.
81 SEE by my paper" postcards
Ignatz, that Chicago instructor has
discovered that in Roman Egyptian
days a horse cost $3.50, d. pig cents,
sheep cents and a Gallo slave 81
cents. On that basis what do you sup
pose a Ford would have been knocked
down for?"
ACCORDING to dispatches from the
Mexican border, most of our leading
bOwlers are members of the state
troops on duty there.
MISS Mary Black of Kansas City,
Mo, who has been wishing Miss Lena
Hubbard of the Frederick apartments,
has gone to Toronto, Canada, to visit
her son.-Indianapolis Star
RESPONDING TO MALICE.
When bitterness begins to speak