South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1916-12-20
YEGG JOKE SENT
HIM TO CALCUTTA
Jimmie Ryan Alias "0hiO Jim
mic" is Back With a
New Name.

Ryan OF Kerry Patch is back in
town-JiInmie Ryan, alias ohio
Jimmie" yeggman, four-term ex-
convict and Irishman
And I've got a new name this
time" said Jimmie. I'm a globe
trctter. 1 am now Bide a bit and
III ell ye.
IL all begins when that big sec
onG cousin OF the kaiser, Detective
Serst. Kaiser. spied me in the Patch
in January, 1912. He SCI 10 me that
they had room for me down at
headquarters and he took me down
70 an IT,
Me and some of the boys had
asst cracked open a nice little baby
over in Swayzie Ind. About So. 500
in suckers. yellows, whites and
green's. we got And me. got \
busted arm 70 boot I didn't zap.
They kept me IS days before they
found the wing was hanging. They
patched it up and then the big
kaiser took me over 10 indianapolis
They soaked me quick-five
years in LeaVenworth
Had Been There Before.
They had a musher receiving
clerk there-a kinda fresh guy.
Imagine kiddin me. me that had
been there before and knew more
about the cage than he ever would.
so. when he asked me too sassy
like where / wus born, ] SEE 10 him:
ON the border. on the ragged edge
between Calcutta and Bombay.
Hum, he SEE. British subject
II got out in three years, five
months. Right at the door was "a
U. 5. dick and ne took me-
We're goin' TO send you home,
ne SEE.
Me. had visions of Kerry
Patch. But ne put me on the wrong
train and / went towards Frisco.
Where you takin' me- ] asked.
Back 10 the black hole Of Cal
cutta, where you come from. SEE
ne.
- help me that sinner at
LeavenworH had swallowed bait
and all
81 couldn't do nothing and 1
watched EN- put me aboard the
Nip pom Maru and heard the Unit
ed States sinner tell the captain:
Don't you let him set foot in Amer
lea again. Me. a loyal subject of
Kerry Patch.
Twas a long trip across the
ocean. / had time 10 kind NV look
myself over and sez TO myself, SEE
J. Jimmie. you brace up and
wherever they take you, when you
step off the water, you be a gem
tleman.'
II had a bit OF down on my up
per lip. and ] trained il up a bit
and smoothed out my clothes and
begged a collar. i wuz travelling
second cabin
German spy he Ser.
The boat stopped at Hong Kong
and a bull boat came up. one OF
them foreign coppers looked at my
mustache.
"He knew me right away. Ger
man spy he sez. An they took me.
They took me TO a place that had
a sign Victoria gaol'
1T took them Il days TO find
out me Irish talk was better iden-
tifcation than me German fringe.
lon the way TO Calcutta. I wuz
again. They met me al the boat
they did Polite like they were and
"a fellow they called the charge Of
affairs he took me up 20 his house
where there was a lion floating on
flag and he SEE:
WELDON" home
They threw me in the original
Black Hole of Calcutta. l was put
turning a crank.
They were hundreds OF others
turning cranks. The craBks didn't
ran anything. They just kept them
hos turning 'em to keep EN- happy.
IT stood it three days. Then
made EN- take me 10 the charge of
affairs and I SEE 10 him:
Look here I SEE, I wuz born
i'm Kerry Patch. st. Looie It's in the
country run by the biggest boy in
the world and / want TO go back
You're a British subject SEE
ne.
British. sez T. I'm American
He found IL out "a month later
They took me down TO the boat
again. S'heip me if it wasn't the old
Nippon Maru
Il got 20 Frisco month ago and
20 Kerry Patch as soon as Uncle
Sans money they'd given me in
Frisco would get me here.
Now look at me-" said Jimmie
Fine welcome they give me But
it's better than Calcutta"
Jimmie has been released Tho
police found out he had been work
ing with q wrecking crew ever since
ne arrived
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