Norwich bulletin. [volume] (Norwich, Conn.) 1895-2011, 1916-01-18
HER INTELLIGENT UNCLE


Weli!'' exclaimed the visiting
bachelor uncle. - ha entered the h-
hrarx ana discovered hiz niece alone
and reading, 1T seems good to hnd
you stationary for oncei Ever since
Just going or just coming in to get
ready 70 so again. What have you
done with the shadow PIT
The pretty girl tried to frown. but
succeeded only In dimpAnEs Why.
what do you meau2s she demanded
sH'mis snirad the. bachelor uncle.
opening the cigar Jar, ''as though you
didn't knDwi / mean that Hiram
fellow the chap you can't move with
cut having ct your heels! some , Gay
and bet he lies right down.
"Tf you mean Mr. Foster, MUIR
INJURED the pretty girl, his name y
Il know srowled the bachelor un-
Gle, "but It. ought to be Hiram. be-
cause he looks like q Hiram! Oh,
know he's Handsome didn't mean
that! But he's at least six feet one
with shoulders like an OK and I'll bet
IL he'd ever seen q harvest field he
could stack all the hay in its himself
It would be lots more interesting IL
could call him Claude or Percy and
Jeer at him, but he's too husky, so
take II out in calling him Hiram. IT
usually is the custom when your fav-
ofite niece Is barricaded from YOU
by an interfering young man to call
him Claude, and ease your soul that
way, but I can't even do that. He's
too doggone able to take care of him.
self for q man OF my years to ruffle
bis temper. Are you going to marry
him ~
Wh-wh-uncle!' stammered the
pretty girl. .fWh--why. certainly not!
The ideal He's just a friend!"
AHari Har!" said the bachelor UNI
Gle gloonily, Hes the prize friend!
Then that's the reason friendship IL
going to seed these degenerate days
few young men who pay their board
can afford to be just friend! You've
had three big boxes of candy, a the
alter and dance from him this week,
with taxis and orchids and lilies of the
valley! ! suppose he just ran right
out in the back yard and piucked
those lilies out of sn0wbank, and
maybe q relative keeps a candy fac
tory. 1t may be, but ON the whole !
don't know! I should say he had a
high ideal of friendship
usually q friend is person who
drops in to see you when he hasn't
any other place to go, and stays to
supper and eats three times as much
as any member of the family. and
possibly offers you a stick of chew
ing gum. He knows that You love
him for himself alone and SO he
doesn't have to make any special eff
fort. So 1t looks as though this Hi
ram chap was sort of on the anxious
seat.
@on the other hand, fellow doesn't
80 around spending his Inheritance on
a girl like drunken sailor, II he feels
it is entirely, absolutely useless. ]
sincerely trust you haven't been lead
ing Hiram on and deluding him with
any false hopes. seeing that you don't
intend to marry him. I kind of took
It for granted that you two were en-
why, unclei'' protested the pretty
girl. in some confusion. I'm sure
don't see why"
Il suppose not" said the bachelor
uncle. That's what the man said who
| was getting his head cut off. just al
| the instant the executioner raised the
ak friend who hads been out oil
town rushed up and cried, My good
nessl You're being executed
don't see what makes you think thati'
on the block. That's just like you
1 the case is exactly as obvious. Come
on and tell uncle your troubles
mean your secretip
Haven't got any secret" protected
the pretty girl, shaking her head Wig.
orously.
Gee! I'd hate to be judge com.
mented the bachelor uncle. How
can he tell when a. woman is telling
| the truth2 I suppose he decides it bs
the length of her eyeIashes. BY tbs
way, was Hiram measuring your eye.
lashes, when came upon you sud
denly at the door last night2 Or
maybe. it was a cinder in your eye
Oh, 7 didn't lingelA so you needn'
look ccnfusedi guess know M
place! Anyhow. I think you're NEAR
| not to tell me- BY the way, go
seats to-day to take you to the operf
Wednesday night. You can wear al
your glad rags. You weren't going t.
do anything special, Were you?''
"oh, mol" said the pretty girl hast,