The Columbus courier. [volume] (Columbus, Luna County, N.M.) 1911-1920, 1916-09-22
FINNECAN'S PHILOSOPHY
BALAAM.

well DO ! mind the StOry,' said
Finncvan. "Balnnm was a hlghbrow
thnt knnwed less than his Jncknss. Ne
tnuk nn office to curse the people
The luckHss saved them. "ris all In
Number Twlniy.two. Och. honel It's
different these times. The Inckass
knew better IN Balnam tanned him
"l.aye ms ride We. says Balanm, nm
I'll make We the biggest Ass In the
wnrld.'
Great says the ASS what dye
feedT
Pork says Bnlanm.
"'Me savior says the ass.
"Sn Bnlnam mounts. But soon the
Jack halks.
"'rhwHt Is IT, SAYS Bulwnm.
Snakes, says the ASS ~ looks
like the ]lnwhone nv me mother
"'G'wHn' says Buluum. hittiu' the
ASS q clip, ''tis me furrpn' policy
he says.
"'Phwat's NJ fory axes the ASS.
ut dehnds the nashun.' says Blu.
laam.
"'HowT says the ASS.
"'Edi:h says Balaam. ut takes "a
bigger Ass than you to know that.
Lave Il TO Brine says BALKAN Ia the
As: an the lack walks ou mrtiln.
tin.
lice. hnw,' says the ASS, hulkin'
un' Elrtin'
"'\Nhat 90 = SAYS Ruluum.
eli Il ,#..H a.. H... - . "a M
Sul~ Ih" A,~ II could he q frog
suy~ hr. 'fnr NJ StundS ~ iu front.
aud ~iis down behind an lis mus'ly
mouth slys the ASS. Ut has white
fenth,rs, says the jack. wild yuiler
Streaks. that changes he says, TO
Very Crooz Red. r Nlngury Blue. an
now they're Currtsnll WALLER again.
says he. 'lllyins. have ! been drink.
INT screams the Ass To Balnnm.
saints he praised suys BALKAN.
Me Watchful Wnitin' ran still change
It's mind he says. 'G'whn. where
glory waits he say 'G'wnn. In the
service nv Mankind says Bnlnnm to
the, ASS, touching him mp. An the
ASS shutlies uhrnd. wRvin his eRrs In
admiration.
"'Hee-hnwl llae-haw = says the
Jack, rearin' w wild his eyes bulgin'.
"'Phwut'S gripuln' ye now says
Bulaum. l%mpuShunt like.
81 dunno. says the ASS. III looks
like the FLYNN nutchmnn with a So.
clnlist Grew. he says.
"%'"is me Ship Bill. says BALKAN.
Side step to the right he says (;
side step TO the left says he, wei.
tin hlm. Back up says Balnnm,
Now forward for the Merchant Ma.
rinr an tifty mlllyun pork. says la.
lanil wild u shower NV blows an the
Ass gees on thremhlin'.
"'Wnh-hee! Walshee! Wah-hee :
snys the Jack, shyln' so he near
threw his rider.
"'l1l learn We to shy az me Naval
Bill says Bnluum. lnr-rupin' the
haste so he cud scarce stand.
I'VE can't puss NJ Nlduut wcarin
Republican CLOTHES, snys the Jack In
IL coarse whisper
we ASS. SAYS Ra'rnm. Don't y,
knuW that amy clOes Is betther MOI
n~akedness2 G'wan,' says Bnlaam, In
tones NV thunder. So the poor bnst'
lopes on, llmpln' wild pain.
"I'vr not time 10 tell We an the nd
ventures they had. hut they KEEP oI
over rough roads. now an then eros
sin q ditch uu 70 wan term plank
-It-L ..t. n.n.v. suu.N..
Iviry time the jack kicked, he go
short rntionS an II wallOp. So wheI
the Journey was neur over the poo
haste was all In, and fur too proud Il
fight. Any Jack-Ass can be tia
when he's licked.
EVAN stormy night, the Jack bloom
into u harmony like Il Dimycrat Turf
Hymn played IN a gnsplpe wid tn
feet.
"'Phwnt ais We nowT calls Bnlaam
clubbin' him wild both hands.
"'Nlvvcr did ! pass the like. Yell
the Ass. sweating aud ,hremhiin'. ~
says ut's mn eight hour law. ON. phwa
ls utT' screams the ASS to Bulaaln
feebly Vaughn his ears.
80 dlnno phwHt NJ II meseif, say
Balaam, but ! know phwHi ut's got
Ralaam says.
"PhwHtT axes the poor ASS.
"'Five hundther thousand votes
says Buluum. wild u plOus mir. GwHI
ye big Ass, an dnant ye argue wi
an Iduylist.' says BalnWm To the A.
awe can't pnss ut In the dark
pleads the Ass. Lave US wait IA
light means the ASS, weepin'.
"'Nix.' Snys Rnlaam. There's q he
time comm an' the vOtesn spill
/, DO We thurst for sixteen more year
In the wilderness7 Giddap says h
'purgin' yer heart, says Balaam. 4
9 lNlry thought that's selfish, says III
lanm. or personal chants Bnlaam
the poor ASS ticklin' the Jacks sla
wild u enupiln' pin.