The sun., 1916-08-16
MEN SIT AND LIZ.
Drinks, Boasts and . Cab Collision In
the Search for the Blonde.

Dfluks, bOhstS q 0 o COIlISIOm ID
the Search for the Blonde.
To THE EDITOR OF THE sUN-Str: Why
10 1t that SO many gentlemen whose
honor has never been assailed. whose
honesty and business integrity have
never been questioned. and who rightly
place high value on and take grea,
pride In their regulations as men OF
probity and responsibility. will so often
sit together In their club or cafe and lie
to each other about trivial things or
frivolous. unimportant personal achieve
ments-some OF which exist only In their
imagination-wlth a barefacedness only
equalled by the futility Of 1t all? And do
this. too. In a state of ice cold sobriety.
Fish stories probably prcdate Jonah,
and to-day there is no really ambitious
salt water bathing beach but has at
least one mar eating shark. After golf
came in the 1000 yard put VAS heard
Of almost simultaneously with the click
OF the ice In the glass OF the tenth
Scotch and o at the clubhouse. Later
autos were run on high gear up hills
whose inclined roads make the trail to
the top OF Mount Mckinley look as fiat
as the Merrick road on Long Island.
Aeroplanes have not yet become so COM
mon that they are "A feature OF this
Munchausenlike small talk. but their
day will arrive. Think Of some cheer
full liar In a year soon to come telling
how he few from Chicago to New York
In twenty minutes. when as n matter of
fact II too him nearly an hour.
1t was Just this sort OF childishly
boastful conversation that Rill. a few
other friends and myself were enjoying
at a table not so far from the bar that
the poor waiter who was serving w
would be overcome In his many trips
this hot weather. We should always
he mindful OF others. Then the subject
Of forced Professionalism because of the
car strike came up. Bill, .aid that he
used to think nothing OF a walk OF a
hundred blocks. Some one else said
that when he lived in Staten Island he
used to walk around the island before
breakfast each morning. II really was
nothing. Another chap. who lives in
New Rochelle m whose ONCE is near
Bowling Green, told how he used to walk
from his home to his Office every fair
morning and several times caught cold
because absentmindedly he had passed
his office n got his feet wet by walk
ing of the sea wall at the Battery. 1t
was up to me.
We'll. gentlemen" said, all you
have told US il most interesting. But
I want you to know what happened To-
me one Sunday morning. I started that
morning on foot from West 10th street
Tor ttA In.rtaf q. .t 50, $40. 49,.
My old friend Joe Gross there knows
just what ! want. As I walked !
thought. I do my best thinking when
walking"
That's why YOU don't suffer from
corns, isn't it, put in BIZ.
However I continued, paying no
attention to Blll. ~ walked on and on.
The urban scenes dissolved into the sub.
urban. and these in turn changed to
the open country. still | thought on
What" And forgot all about your
drink? ?" said Bill. amazed.
please u up! I'm lying. I mean
talking" I replied. II walked on and
presently found myself in Philadelphia.
Gentlemen. II was frightful. You can't &c,
a drink in Philadelphia on Sunday for
love or money. At least ! couldn't
After having lied our lies We all .fel,
better. II was then decided that Bill
and ! should enter into a walking con-
test. partly for the sport OF the thing
and partly on foot in preparation n
continue the search for my lost blonde
s!ster-in-law. II was arranged that Bill
and ! should walk down on the oppo-
site sides OF Broadway to the Battery.