The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1916-01-15

walls, but never of rubbing his chin
He confided to the office-boy in the |
next building his suspicious that his
boss was about to raise chin-whiskerS,
and he declared that if such a helm
Gus crime was committed he would
strike for higher wages and leave MS
place if he did not get them
! Mr.. Bowser made a rush again for
the glass when he reached home that
evening His face was still fat and
round His chin was still there. A
stubble of a beard was there to be
| blocked out. Within an hour he would
\ make a start to become a different
| man He rather hurried up his din
/ ner to get away to the BARRIERS. 1t
| was as he arose from the table that
he said to Mrs. Bowser:
| NV dear, have you noticed that
have not shaved for the last three or
| four days?"
4 Il have" was the reply w nat Is
/ the natter %
/ ut is rheumatism in the right arm,
/ and 1 dare not use my razor. VIII
run out to the BARRIERS ana get TINS
! stubble moved Off.
"You will look better for it" she
\ said as he passed down the hall TO aon
| coat and hat
nassing along the street, while the
! bright moon of a winters evening cast
/ it's shadow ahead of him. There was
no shadow of chin-whiskers, but there
I soon would be-
] N
arriving at the barber shop. He mad
come on an errand that might create
or wreck an empire, but he was de-
ternlined to see it through
The barber welcomed him ana
escorted him to the chair. and while
he mixed and applied the lather ne
felt it his duty to entertain a guest
He began by asking:
Did you hear about the man VINO
i committed suicide about two hours
i ago?" .- -
| around here somewhere"
"Only three blocks away He jump
+ ed from a wharf into the Gownus
j Canal and went down to the bottom
( like a stone. Some boys saw him
Jump in. What do you suppose was
his last act before he jumped ?"
"He pulled off his coat maybe 2
said Mr.. Bowser.
mo, he didn't; he tugged at ms
chin whiskers as if he would pull them
4 out by the roots"
4 THAT was funny"
Il And yet it wasn't" went on the
4 barber as he rubbed away at the
! cheek. ''Four-fifths of the suicides
! among men are wearers or chlh-WHls-
kers. 1t seems to affect their Drains
the raising of whiskers on the chin
81 don't see how that can be,
bluntly exclaimed Mr.. Bowser. Nv MS
4 kers have nothing to do with the
brain, whether on chin or cheeks.
the barber in propitiating tones
have been in this business for twenty
years and 1 have made a study OF
whiskers all that time. Let me give
you a tip If you want to come 10
grief raise and wear chin whiskers-
No man of sound judgment ever wears
them. They denote weak character.
They denote a vacillating mind. They
are a sign of vanity.
81 can't agree with you,' protested
Mr.. Bowser. Take my own case
here Would you say that I am a
weak minded or vain mani"
quite the contrary, sir
Then what difference would 1t
make II I wore chin whiskers?"
r "It would change your looks entire
ffg sir You will excuse me, am sure,
Abut If you brought chin whiskers in
this shop 1 should have a poor opin-
ion Of your character. You would lie
like a man 1 have heard Of His name
is Bowser, and he lives about mile
from here
he sat up a little.
"why, he is the vainest and most
conceited man in all the town. He
quarrels with his wife and Is always
in the wrong. He is always kicking
to his butcher and grocer. He is al
ways wanting to raise chickens, go to
| the North Pole, some such fool
thing. Say, didn't get the name of
| the man who jumped into the canal,
but thought strikes me. I'll bet a
dollar even up that it was old Bowser
himself. It would be just like him to
start In and grow chin whiskers, and
when he found what the world
thought of him he became respondent
and rushed for the canal. AS soon as
you go out I shall try to find out
whether it is him or not. 1 believe
he has been in this shop two or three
times and that 1 could identify him,
even If dead. There is little room,
sir, for cranks and kickers in this
world Of ours, and maybe it was time
for old Bowser to go up there where
they play on the golden harps."
"You seem to have a personal
grudge in this CASE said Mr.. Bowser
as he made motion II to get out
of the chair.
"Oh, no, no, no." said the barber,
fourishing the razor around. I'm
fact, instead of a grudge 1 have pity
for him. whether he is alive dead.
1 have read and heard enough about
him to realize that he was born half
witted and can't help being what he
is. It's pretty hard on his wife,
though. and the last straw to break
the camel's back would be for him to
grow chin whiskers. VIII you start in