The daily telegram. [volume] (Clarksburg, W. Va.) 1901-1926, 1916-03-29

Sne Woulus see lWnether ne would or
not! He picked tipsa snack of break
fast, put some douEhnuts In hfs porlT-
ct and started out across the. pasture
into the woods.
1t was a bang-up day, with a light
snow on the ground, and before Life
realized 1t he could tell by the hollow
feeling in his stomach that IT was
noon.
He sat down ona log and began eat
ing a doughntt. While. he was mlnollr
ing away he heard the bushes craek1e
and he looked UP and saw a big bull
moose coming along toward him. ~
Life had left his rife leaning against
a tree, so he scoorhed down on his
hands and knees and crawled along
after 1t. The moose didn't wait for
him. and when he got the rife the
moose was gone. Il
He followed along ON the tracks,
however, and after a while came out
into little opening in the woods. 81
Now old Sarah was. so mad when
Life went hunting after all she had
said. that she wouldn't getiu till at-
ter 10 o'clock. She ate a little dim
ner and went to hooking a rug with
white dove Of peace in the center.
She didn't soften up enough To let
the cat inEtill along toward night.
After waiting quite q spell. Sarah.
put q shawl over her head and went
over to Lem Perkina'B-her nearest
neishbof. Lem was milking, but he
cheered Sarah UP by saying that he
guessed Life would drift back In time.
as such ones almost always do. !, 4,
Howsoever, after milking, lem and
the hired man went back home with
Sarah and fired Idfe's wood huck gun.
o. few times and butt q bonfire. but
none of them things fetched Life.
The next morning Perkins and the
hired man took Life's tracks and fol-
lowed them as far as "a tree In. the
opening. There the tracks stopped.
Life'R gun was ding against the
tree. and one mitten was laying In the
snow. Next day eyeryb body from South
Seboomok to Bowerba bank was hunting
for Life and talking about the. mystery.
Sarah Is one OF the pillars OF the
Seventh Day church and has been ex-
pectinE the end OF the world for quite
a spell back, and when she heard about
the tracks ending up q tree she said
Life had been took.
Nothing would do but she must have
a funeral for him so she had one. All,
North seboomok turned olit--that is.
Everybody except Life. Right In the
midst OF the services. though, Life
walked into the stable and scared Per-
dns's hired man SO bad that he Jumped.
up and hit his head against a beam
and made a knob on 1t that's there
yet.
The hired man told Life It was a
surprise party and they were waiting
for him inside. So Life he climbed
up the back stairs. put on his best bib
and tucker. and goes down and walks
right into his own funeral, with Elder
Leech preaching the funeral sermon,
It ain't wise TO print Just. what hap
pened, but Life broke up the funeral
all right and wound UP by hitchinE
Lizzie, the old white mare. and carry
ing the singers home.
About a week ago Life was down in
front OF Jetf Peale's store, and Elder
1eech went up and asked him IL he
hadn't forgot some thing. Life counted
the strings on his fingers and said he
guessed he hadn't
+ Then the der said he hasn't never
rot any pay for preaching the funeral
sermon Life said he caltlated that
he wouldn't pay for his funeral SER
mon till he was dead.
The elder said he didn't care whethz
er Life was dead or NOT; he preached
the sermon and he wanted the money.
The npshot Of the whole matter was
that the elder has sued Life for the
price OF the sermon.
The case Is to come of before siias
Judkins. justice OF the peace silas
says he has already looked through
the revised statutes % nine states
without finding anything to cover tho
point.
The town ts pretty welf shet up over
the coming trial, but the heft Of tho
betting seems 10 he on the elder.
II seems that while he was follow
Ing the moose he heard spmebody hoIi-
en- up over his head He looked up and
there was q balloon coming along
dragging an anchor. The anchor
caught In the tree and they hoilered
To Life to come DIP and Set them go
a.