Albuquerque morning journal. [volume] (Albuquerque, N.M.) 1903-1926, 1916-02-27
Champ CLARK Boards Train
With Ticket -Four Years Old
Which Reads for BaItimorei
BIameS Hearst for It,
PERKINS CARRIES BAG
FOR COL. ROOSEVELT
President Wilson, Cabinet Of
ficers and Leading Diplo-
mats Enjoy High links of
Newspaper Men.

Washington, Feb. 2t,--The iildirOn
club tonight at its second dinner of
the winter. projected itself into the
convention activities of next June and
helped distinguished party of presi-
dental makers and candidates board
trains for Chicago and st. Louis to
meet the fates awaiting them there.
In a make-b believe railway station the
actor members OF the club satirised
the foibles of some of their guests and
some well-known mon who were not
present.
President Wilson was among those
who looked on and he may have re-
ceiyed an intimation OF the opposition
he will meet later in the year. Vice
President Marshall. the secretaries of
state, navy and interior, the Brazilian
the Chinese and Bolivian
ministers, several members of the SEN
ate and house, officers of The army
aud navy. and n member OF the most
notable figures ia me nations finan-
cial and Industrial life were present.
The newly elected president Of the
club, Louis W. Strayer, Of the Pitts
burgh Dispatch, was inaugurated with
Il humorous sltit in which all mem
bers participated, variously attired 10
represent the old guard, the regular
army reserve. the continental army,
the government merchant marine, the
progressive party ana war tax revenue
collectors,
Crowds Board Trains.
The most ambitious of several
sketches presented by the club was the
political one Scrambes to make
trains. strange travelling companions,
and ticket complexities that confound-
cd the railway gatemen, offered ex-
opportunities for fln-
making. Passing through the Chica-
go gate were regular and progressive
characters representing
former Senators Burton and Bcver-
idge, former Vice President Fairbanks,
Senators Sherman, Borah, Cummns,
Weeks and Penrose, Representatives
Cannon, former President Roosevelt,
William Barnes and George w. Per-
kins of New York. Through the st.
Louis gate passed Secretary McAdoo,
Postmaster General Bureson, Charles
f.. Murphy Of New York and William
Jennings Bryan.
The first passenger to reach tho
Chicago train was recognized by one
Of the two gatemen as Senator Bur
ton. Nervous and fused, he in
ouired If he we're too late and ap-
peared greatly relieved when told that
he was '1cading the parade"
"You won't be too late till you get
to Chicago" he was informed as the
gateman punched his ticket
Next came q passenger for st. Louis
who was hailed as Secretary McAdoo.
He produced weird looking ticket,
finally recognized as mileage, which
the gateman examined latorlously.
Muttering that it seemed "as compll-
Gated as the shipping BILL the gate
man asked If mistake hadn't been
made. It's intricacies were explained
by methods of addition and subtrac-
ton, and the passenger passed through
grinnine. The pateman. recovering,
remarked to his pail That wasn't no
railroad ticket: that was today's treas
ury statement.
Clark Carries Broken Plank.
Among the next batch of passen-
gers was a tall. heavy-set man, carry
ing a broken plank under his arm,
who tried to crowd through the ST
Louis gateway
"Hey. Mr. Speaker" expostulated
the gateman. this ticket amt MOI
good. 1t reads for Baltimore. And
it's four years old
II knew it, shouted the passenger,
who resembled Champ Clark. "Bill
Hearst told me to Try TO work Il off,
but the darn ticket never was any
good"
The speaker finally got through on
missouri mileage" but the plank be-
came wcdged in the gateway. As he
tried To disengage it. he explained
that il "came out of the Baltimore cy-
clone, and was the last surviving bit
Of the one-term plank. They asked
him what good il wns. and he replied
that ne was merely following T. RS
to swim. but always
carry life preserver.'
Vice President Marshall, extremely
nervous. was closely followed by Sena-
tor Lewis Of Illinois.
II ought to be nervous" he ex-