The Greenville journal. [volume] (Greenville, Ohio) 1850-1918, 1916-10-19
FINNEGAN'S PHILOSOPHY.
On The Msrry-e Co Round.


++@*4*+++%@*&4ss+.s@ .s@ss%**+s~
Faith an now Wilson's for pro-
lection. -Four year agone he was agin
1t, for 1t wCs agin the cOnstychOOshun.
Now that lie is for 1t, that immortal
Instrument has also changed its
mind. He makes me head shwim.
"But I've good company. Bryan an
Garrison, the civil service Dimycrats,
and the rale Dimycrats, the Passyfsts
an the vulgar sows that's none Too
Proud to Fight-they've all been on
the Merry-go-round. Some iv thin
turned sick.
"'GOd bless ye-ye're a good man.
but We make me dizzy" says Bryan.
Ieppin' from the Hobby-HOrse and run
min for the woods. I've a ginywine
raygrit at losin' ye,' says Wudthrow
thrOwin' him a Cooked Hat iv the vim
tage of 1909.
"'Here's the Army BILL" says CARR
son. How does it suitP he axes.
"'Fine,' says Wudthrow, 'barrin' a
few changes. 'Ye1l redraw it. he
says, to provide says he, voluntary
universal service in a Federal Mi
llishy, says he, controlled be the
states says he; AN recruited be
spiritual com-pulsion,' says he. 1T
shud be nayther too large nor too
small says he; or maybe BOTH he
says; an the ammynition. says he
must be nayther too much, nor too
little says he. I've to see Hay, be-
fore decide the daytales, for it's ME
j'ooty to kape an open mind says
WudthrOw.
"'Stop the music and lave me off,
says Garrison. Are ye crazy or am
IT Garrison means, layin' on his back
an gain wildly at tn sky. God bless
ye,' says Wudthrow. I've near-feal
raygrit at losin you he says. And as
Garrison beats 1t to Jarsey the Merry.
| gO-ROund plays a side step.
"'F'what iv the Navy says Kitchin
1T shud be thur'y adequate ivry-
where, says the Great Idaylist, 'ex-
cept In Montany. where we need no
Navy says he. and In St LOuey,
where 1t shud be the biggest in the
world. Wen be none eXthravagant
like thin Republicans says he, so
here's the Dimycrat bill yell pass,
says he.
"'But this same is the Raypubli-
cans BILL says Kitchin starin'. Yen
go an pass it. says WudthrOw, pound
ing the desk. 'Hooray,' says the black
Republicans vOtin' for the bill. DO
dream says Kitchin. If | iver
drank, I'd t'tink I was booZed,' says
Kitchin in a thremblin' vice. And he
falls off.
"'HOw about the Army bill axes
Hay.
"'ThrOugh an instant preparation
for definse must be the wurd.' says
WudthrOw, wild heroic ris'lutiOn in his
eye.
"'I have here bill says Hay, pro.
vidin' for an increase iv five hundther
men a year for twinty year he says
an amynishun for six hours acksun.'
he says; twill make us safe from
maddygasker. measles. muckrakin'
milit-rism and marital infidility. he
says, AN well catch Willy before he
dies av he doant die before we catch
him. says Hay.
"'Embrace me, says wilson Or
Hay - afther all preparedness is u
matter iv the heart an not of guns
or forts. Did Cleveland ivir give ye
job" he axes stOppin short like
l twill
says Wudthrow shakin' the both iv
Hays hands cordial like for yer patri
Otic service in so bravely sippOrtin
me policies he says, in all theh
phrases he says; I make q Judge iv
ye'he, says he, as well as yer frinC
that ye put in the JOKER says the
Prisidint 'Howly Saints says the
preparation S'nitOrs.
"'Ph-what does this mean at all at
alp they axes I've the wan thrack
mind says the Presidint, AN We go
all through me train iv thought before
ye come to the pork car says he.
Are We on? aArs the Apostle iv Com.
mon COunSelS.
"We're on says the SinitOrs, fall.
ing off. An the Merry -g0-round plays
a Wilson Waltz (Which We know, Jawn.
is wan step forward, two steps back.
hesitate and sidestep). An Tumulty
goes out to spread the glad tidin's that
the preparation p'rade will be led be
the Presidint in person.
"'HOw does he save his faceT asked
Malumphy.
| "'Wid hiS mouth responded Finne