Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1916-12-30
GREASING UP THE
OLD WATER WAGON
The Bee Secures Exclusive In
terview with Cynical Driver
of Historic Vehicle.
1T IS NOT HARD TO RIDE
By A. R. GROH.

a man who is very busy these days.
He is the driver OF the water wagon,
the no-smokins wagon and other
vehicles that carry heavy loads the
first few days oflevery year.
l found him greasing up his ag-
ons, getting ready for the New
Years rush. A sour-faced, cynical
fellow he is. ..., $751;.
We'll, | see you're getting the old
boats ready fl the annual trip" |
said. .H.
YEAH" he drawled, without stop
ping his work.
Expecting a big loat this ycar?'
| continued
ooh, l .eckon tn first day er two
we'll have tn usual crowd" he
grunted with cynical laugh.
"You don. think it'll last, them" |
inquired. a..... ..,: 49,.
Huh! Course it won't last" he
rasped. Never does" -....
Most of EN- fall off, eh?" said.
Most Jump Of.
Fall OFF, he exclaimed, Don't
let 'em tell that They git of.
Some of 'em Try to let on it's too
rough rid;n,, but there amt no truth
in that. Them wagons rides smooth
as a parlo- car. Some of 'ei claims
they git down to pi> up TIL whip.
Some says they git off to Civ their
seat to lady. All lies! They just
git off cause they don't want to stick
on. That's all | can't chain EN- on.
It's agin' tn rules O. the company"
Hardly pays to the wagons
out at ALL" l sympathized
"Oh, it pays me, all right" he num-
bled. II gifts my wages tn year
round whether anybody rides er not.
Makes it easier on tn horses, too.
Don't worry me none if they don't
want t ride"
Too badp l said, and then de-
parted, leaving the old fellow num-
bling to himself as he creased up the
wagons.
And il will be even so. You know
how it is, fellows. These last few
days of the old year are the best of
all. The resolution has been taken
and one can indulge in smoking (for
example) to his hearts content and
still have the glow of knowing that
this will all soon be thing of the
past. All, how one will look back on
the days when one used to poison
oneself with nicotine! So one thinks,
does one not?
Then comes New Years eve. As
the whistles blow and the bells ring,
our hero takes the half-smoked cigar
from his lips and, with an expression
of high and lofty resolve, solenlnly
throws it away, while friends applaud
his mighty will-power.
Misses His Smokes.
The next day or two, though, he
misses his usual cigars; he is upheld
by the joy of telling everybody that
he has "cut it all out" He looks
with considerable pity on his weaker
willed friends who are still INDUCING.
January 3 he is dining out The
post-prandial cigars are passed. He
hesitates. He is lost "Well, I'll
make an exception to the rule just
when I'm dining out" he tells his
conscience. $No use being foolish
about it. Don't want to be, kill
JOY"
Certainly not! Who wants to be
kill-joy?
January 4 he decides he'll make it
one day. No more, mind you! He
smokes his one for that day in the
morning. In the afternoon he intro
duces another amendment to his res
olution, making it two day. The
amendment is passed, conscience
casting the only opposing vote. :.
January he's completely down off
the wagon. Alasl Alas! Such is
the state of man