The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1916-07-26
ON SPUR OF
THE MOMENT
BY ROY X. MOULToN,


Revenge.
Twas long ago she won my heart,
And swore from me she'd never part.
When she gave me her maiden kiss,
i tell you, fellers, 1t was bnss-
had friend, his name was Jim;
To him she somehow took wnim-
1 don't know how it came about,
But Jim, he sort of cut me out
She was, in fact, a beauty bright.
But 1 got my revenge on Jim
You see, she up and married MIN.
"Old JIM" they call him In our town;
He Jumps around and wears frown
His shoulders they are bent with TOLL
And he's as sore as any boil
She's interested in new thought,
And doesn't know the things she ought
She hires three maids to do her work,
But Jim has not chance to shfrk.
Jim had the laugh on me, all right,
When he COPIED out my beauty bright
That was in the dim and dismal past
He chuckles best who chuckles last.
Pity the Poor Microbe.
1t is announced that the University
Of California has received a donation
fund to be used in research work
among the microbes. It may seem
to the lay mind that nearly all of the
possible microbes have been discov-
cred already, but this is a common
error The scientists have never yet
failed to come to the front with
new microbe when there seemed to
be a demand for one. They began dis
covering them in large and diversified
quantities about ten years ago and
have been hard at it ever since. One
of the first was the drinking cup mic
robe, but closely following this came
the dollar-bill microbe. the door-han-
die microbe, the telephone microbe,
the roller-towel microbe. the hand
shake microbe, the kiss nicrobe and
enough others to fill seven columns of
a newspaper printed in agate type.
1t is sometimes a question how the
forefathers worried along and did
everything that they should not do
and defied all these germs With but
very few advantages they lived to
ripe old age and the microbes were
all about them as thick as mosquitoes
in a New Jersey coast village. But
now that the work of discovery has
secured such a grand start it seems
as though it should be pushed to a
finish, If there is finish.
The Retort Discourteous.
While a certain Gaylord young man
slumbered the other night he had a
most wonderful dream. The next
morning he met young woman on
the street and remarked: 1T dreamed
last night that I proposed to you, and
I wonder what that is a sign OF? ?" The
young woman, made desperate by his
dilly-dally methods. replied: Its a
sign that you have got more sense
when you are asleep that when you
are awake.''-Gaylord Advance.
Signs of the Times.
Have you ever noticed how the ice
box door hangs open. One of them
is everlastingly open and the hot air
from the outside is just eating up
your good ice that you have paid for
at taxicab. rates. We have an opin-
ion upon this subject We believe
that the ice trust holds stock in the
refrigerator factories and that every
icebox is SO made that at least one
door will hang open.
An up-to-date paper announces,
Premier performance of Romeo and
Joliet by William Shakespeare" The
only drawback to this premier per-
Torrance is that the author will
probably not be able to be present
One way to make a sleeping porch
comfortable in summer is to hire a
carpenter and have it enclosed and
lathed and plastered just like the rest
of the house. If you can't run the
furnace pipe up to the sleeping room,
The Answer.
After the war is all over,
After the dead are forgot;
Ask for the cause of the carnage
History will answer you, WHAT?
After rebuilding the cities.
Leyeled by cannon and shot:
Ask for the reason they did it
History Will answer you, WHAT?
After all kings are forgotten,
Whether they caused it or not;
Down through the ages to come yet,
The echo will always be WHAT?