The West Virginian. [volume] (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1914-1974, 1916-07-11

wreciing some Ford automobile that
may run into me. Dodging automo..
biles, however. Is the least Of my
woes. Yesterday being an extremely
warm and humid day went into q To-
cal theater, and picked out q good seat
directly beneath a. fan. Just about
the time that ! was becoming comfort.
ably settled the curtain went up and
all the fans in the house were shut of.
Thinking that, something was wrong
with the electrical circuit ! waited oil.
most ten minutes for the fans to again
start. Finally the heat and odors OF
the place became unbearable and | got
up and went to the door. There met
the proprietor and asked him what was
wrong with the fans. He naiyely said
that they had been turned of SO that
the audience could more distinctly
hear the actors. / left as did also near
ly a score OF the mans patrons. Now
| and the other persons who left would
like to see the mans show but we re-
fuse to suffocate?
A. BENEDICT: That Is all true.
My wife says that she never goes to
that place any more for the same rea-
son.
A. DRIVER: What you say of the
theater may BIO true as many mana.
gers think that people come 10 the
show to hear the bum jokes that the
comedians pull. Most people know
however go TO hear the music and to
find cool and comfortable seat in the
summer and warm one in the win.
ter But about your lodging automo.
btes, II the fool pedestrians would
stay of the streets except at crossings
a man might drive a car through town
without being compelled to tear holes
in his tires by quick stops.
ANONYMOUS: Did you fellows
hear about that Guardsman that was
drowned at Kanawha City? Did you
know that at the time this chap was
drowning In the middle OF the stream
man with a boat who was near him
refused TO go to his assistance? Its
true. The chap with the boat was
coming down stream and the men on
the bank called to him to help the
drowning man. When he refused the
Guardsmen who were already swim.
ming out to aid their comrade swan
TO his boat and brought him to shore.
The Guard member drowned before
anyone could reach him. BY the time
the boat and the other man reached
the shore nearly hundred Guards.
men were there and seized him. They
had rope around his neck and would
have hung him at once II some off.
GERS had not arrived in time to prevent
them. Wonder why this fact was sup.
pressed when the story OF the drown
Ing appeared In tho papers!
VoX POPULI: There are a lot OF
things that happen that never get in
the newspapers. OF tie hundreds Of
divorces granted in this county every
year how many are reported in the
papers? Not more than third. Per-
haps II little publicity was given to
these people they would not rush 20
the court every time they happen to
have little quarrel
OLD CITIZEN: see In the papers
that our Industrial Agent Speed will
tell the people what is wrong with tho
town. know what Is wrong with
some OF the people in tho town, but
I think I shall be present and hear
what Mr.. Speed has to say. / move
We adjourn now as such hot night Is
really not a suitable time for debate.
Housewives of this city are crate.
full indeed to the City Board OF Affairs
for their efforts TO lay the dust along
the paved thorofares Of the city. The
street sprinkler makes almost daily
visits over the main streets Of the
city and this sprinkling does much
to lay the dust and keep germs out Of
| IL Al. -.