The Washington herald., 1916-04-07
NEW YORK
DAY By DAY
BY o. o. MCINTYRE

SPECIAL corr~pondena q ne wsShinsssn Hsrsh
New York April s-Prof r., I Garner
the monkey sharp, IL In New York with
an idea 20 open a regular school for the
education of spea he has been as
ISOLATED with monkeys for twenty-hve
years and Ia just about 10 leave on, bis
seventh snthropelogiesl mission to the
French Congo.
He VIII call his school a seminary and
he would establish courses starting with
a kindergarten, and embracing as many
upper grades as were found 10 be
necessary TO meet the requirements OF the
gradual mental awakening Of scholars
He is round faced and has an oval
paunch and does not look like a man
who would feel st home IN either
prfmeval or q partly developed 1ungie,
or who would care the snap Of a finger
about the ultimate winner Of the sinisn
race.
He was born down IN Abingdon. Va.
and when he was q Httle above knee htsh
70 a srsss-hopper he began studying
animal sounds and undertaking 70
classify them.
The man who chaufreurs the truck for
the first page OF the New York Times
tripped on his way 20 the stereotyping
room the other morning-and the firSt
page was q jinkiy-jumple Of "PL" The
man ran out Of the building and toe
Times issued a first page ad for him
to return and take his job back Thus
far he has not been heard from. and n
he continues the pace he set at the start
he Is no doubt somewhere IN California
Charlie Chaplin, the weII-lcnown spend
thrift, stepped out Of Rector's one night
while here and met Broadway pan
handler who said: Pardon me. my
friend hu I IN neAF of
meal Will
Here, my good man." said the pom
pous Charlie with a flourish. extracting
nickel from his pocket take this"
'Thsnks," said the panhandler as he
took the nickel. But you don't happen
to have. a dyspepsia tablet about you.
do your always suffer when overeat"
There ia a smart dancing place on Up
per Broadway that bids for the patronage
Of the ultra set that practices a Coney
Island custom which was responsible for
the closing Of the seaside bonIy-tonkA
Il is one q those places where you may
not dance except IN evening clothes and
where an ordinary highbaH costs Is
cents. There are susdued lights. soft
toned music. and expensive drsper1es.
There are eight dancing girls IN. the
place who appear In himsy frocks and
circulate among the guests They accept
hospltahty-but never drink anything
but champagne. Investigation has devel-
OPed that the girls are given a per
centsge OF the receipts from the sale Of
wine ordered by the patrons.
In the exotic surroundings II is the
transferring OF the customs Of dance
halls OF the mining camps, and Il is be-
lieved that the police will soon close the
place.
Franklin p. Adams tells Of a reporter
on one OF the ''We-print-ths-nevs-w
it-sizzles" papers who OVERSIGHT the other
morning, having attended a bonermSksr's
ball or some other function the night be-
fort.
II was along about noon when he AZ
rived at South Ferry on his way 20 cover
the court news OF the day for his paper.
To make himself solid with the boss
however. he called up the city room and
in few well-chosen words assured him
he was on the job.
Just then the departing ferrybost gave
three shriH whistles and the man in the
city room inquired -sweely: When did
they move the courthouse down TO the
Battery? Get US a column on IL II will
be quite beat" And then he hung Up.