davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-07-06
uraes City Improvement.

The American City, publication re-
viewing municipal work throughout
the country and promoting civic de-
velopment, urges that cities in this
country formulate a three-year i'm
provement program Immediately fol-
lowing the termination of the Euro
pean war 1t points out that such a
plan will serve greatly to diminish the
ill effects of the sudden Stoppage of
the heavy operations of munitions and
other factories in the country and the
consequent throwing of thousands of
men out of employment for the time
being. The suggestion is a good one,
and if generally adopted would, be-
sides accomplishing the effects above
indicated, result in many public i'm
provements that nearly every munich
pality needs and must have in the
course of time if it hopes to be num-
bered among the ''live ones"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-07-06
neutrality-suspicious.

lydia E. Pinkham's Vegetable =
oornd and told my husband about II. I
Said said 4 know nothing will help me ! Dut a
will trv this I found myself lmprov-
i No, from the very first bottle, and IN two W.,
weeks time / was able to sit down anu
eat a hearty breakfast with my nus
/ lam am now in the best of health and
JOHN Jta MA A. KoEN1e, 5o2 Flushing Avenue
Astoria, N. Y. l;t.
Every one breads the surgeons knife
and the operating table Sometimes
nothing else will do; but many times
doctors saw they are necessary when
they are not. Letter after letter comes
to the Pinkham Laboratory, telling hoH
operations were advised and were not
performed; or, if performed, did no good,
but lydia E. Pinkham' Vegetable Com
poundwas used and good healthfollowed'
If you want advice write to
lydia e. Pinkham Medicine Co.
(confdentiaD, Lynn, Mass.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-07-06
Investigate the Onion.

The homely onion has been the sub
ject of an inquiry by British COM
mittee whose duty it was to go into
the matter of its high cost. The re-
port of the committee reveals the fact
that the present high rate of the onion
is due to the stoppage of import from
Holland and Belgium and to the dimin-
ished import from Egypt and Spain.
1t is pointed out that onions can be
grown in England, and to woman gar
deners of even quite amateur expert
ence the contemplative cult of the
onion is to be recommended as real
and useful war work.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-07-06
I he
High SIGN
Blu AlVah Jordan Garth
10Y ~ H2@Yr e&&V@Y@VG@

- =
Copyright, 1916, by w. c. Chapman)
1T isn't fair-I won't! You shan't!
otis done-it was square forfeit
and wont"
Smack! Slap
With lightninglike rapidity two
echoing sounds intruded on the still
garden air One was caused by a kiss
-boyish, forceful, triumphant and
boisterous The other was the result
of swift, sweeping blow from the nut
brown hand of Eugenia Ray.
Walter Ross fairly staggered under
the singing contact. He had not be-
lieved that one set of soft dainty fin
gers could administer such bewilder-
ingly stunning retort. His cheek
famed and smarted. He was a mere
youth and his anger flashed forth His
eyes scintillated. Oh, If she were a
boy!
I'm sorry-Tm sorry!" tumultuous-
ly gasped Eugene, ashamed Of temper,
pitiful as she noted the red line
across the cheek of the manly young
fellow with whom she had had SO
many jolly, friendly times.
You'll be sorrierl" declared Wal
ter. almost furiously. Not that care
for the liss-oh, dear, no! 1t was the
game, and fair and square-you owed
the penalty. Do you suppose the other
girls fared up and acted like bruis-
ers?''
The implication turned Eugene
flaring red. She clutched her tiny
fists and stamped her shapely foot.
You ran after me fast enough to
care for something" she cried
Whether you value the kiss or not
it's your last. I'll forgive it this
time"
You'll go farther than that" insist
ed Walter. You'll kiss the spot you
struck so cruelty before we are
friends again"
II" exclaimed Eugenia, almost
shrilly. 81? Oh, never! If you were
the last man in the world-if it would
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-07-06
Study Historic Designs.

A study of historic design in archi-
lecture is pastime which not only
furnishes a pleasant form of recrea-
ton, hut will, when ones own house
is contemplated, prove exceedingly
helpful.
To be able to recognize at a glance
the lines and notifications of these
historic styles, as expressed in the diff
ferent houses with which you come in
contact, will be most gratifying; and
when you reach the plan stage of your
own home you need not so to your
architect entirely void of ideas,
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-07-06
Good Advice.

If l knew the voters wanted me
would run for Office" said the mod
est man.
My friend" replied the practical
politician, you have the wrong idea
entirely"
why so?"
Don't wait to find out whether or
not the voters want you. Make them
think they want you"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-07-06
s = 3
Gathered Smiles
BoNNETs AND HOODS.
Mrs. Flatbush-w What's the matter

Mrs. Flatbush-What's the matter
now?
Mr.. Flatbush-I was only thinking.
"Of what?"
How much easier it is to manage
an automobile than a wife"
well, don't forget how expensive
an automobile is, compared to a
wife"
We'll, l admit it costs something
for the hood of the automobile, but
it's nothing compared to the money
a woman spends for her bonnets.'
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-07-06
[I.LIJ[N]III Town.
PGlT1IL[RS =
9A Mb
o-ENNS~o
GARDENS AND CHILD WELFARE
Experiment Being Made in New York
is Of Interest to the Entire
Country.

Of far more than ordinary interest
in New York. There, under the di-
rection of the International Child Wei
fare league, and with the cooperation
of state and federal departments, a
practical demonstration of the value
of vacant-lot gardening for children is
being made. At first it will be con-
fined to WestcheSter county, where it
began in February under the guidance
of President Jarvis Of the Connecticut
School of Agriculture. Outlining the
purposes of the experiment, an officer
of the league says:
1--WE believe that to abolish child
labor we must do constructive work.
1t has been found by actual practice
that where children have taken up
gardening they can earn more in a
summer in that work than they can
during an entire year in a factory. The
garden products of the children are
used first for the family and the sur
plus is then marketed.
"When the parents find that the
children can make more money in
this way they will be willing to allow
them to remain longer in school to
prepare them for better positions. In
the meantime the children have been
building character as well as building
themselves up physically. Taking the
children from the factories will lessen
the number of the unemployed. There
are now 100000 children in the fac
tories and there are 100000 unem-
ployed When we are able to take
the children from the factories we
will leave their positions for the adults
who are now idle
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-07-06

MY poor man, how did you happen
t, be arrested?'' asked the sympa-
thetic prison visitor.
1T wuz due to poor Judgment,
num-" replied the second-story man.
How was that?'
Il poked pistol in cove's face an
he trembled so l laughed at i'm. Dat
made i'm SO mad he jumped on me,
beat me to a fragile, an turned me
over to de cops"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-07-06
BEER AND BALL PLAYING.

1t is stated that the Baseball Play.
ers' Fraternity is to prohibit beer
drinking among its members. Ed.
Ruelbach, pitcher of the Boston
Braves, says: 81 have seen many
stars whose careers were cut short
by their Incorporate habits. Con-
served energy is the only thing which
will prolong diamond career. Tenn
perance alnong the players will add
years to their time on the playing
field"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-07-06
Some Salesman.

81 can see at a glance, madam"
said he. that you would not be in
terested in the preparation l am sell
ing, except possibly as a gift to some
of your neighbors."
What are you selling?" she in
quired with interest.
"a facial beauty preparation. mad
am" he replied.-Judge.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-07-06
BEEF INSTEAD OF WHISKY.

my husband used to bring nome
a bottle of whisky on Saturday night
if gave him the money for it. Last
week he brought home rib roast
and he earned the money that bought
it." These words of a washerwoman
of Denver, Colo, sums up the prohi-
bition situation in that city, says the
Denver Post.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-07-06
SPEAKING FRANKLY

I'm sorry we lost our case" said
the lawyer.
Don't drag me into it," snarled the
disgruntled client. q don't MIND ac-
knowledging that l caused the case
to be made, but decline to share in
the responsibility for losing it,
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-07-06
DeeplV VerSed

professor Diggs is an authority on
the Chaldeans."
"Indeed?n
Yes. He knows as much about
those ancient people rs Mrs. Diggs
knows about the Smiths and Joneses
who live next door"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-07-06
Out of sinht.

Belle-Was that little Styles girl
there?
Beulah-Oh, yes.
las conspicuous as ever?"
NO, she wasn't conspicuous"
Why, didn't she have on her white
spats?'
"Oh, yes, but she was sitting on her
feet"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-07-06
C
|Opnpgrat)Ce
{, Mites {,
Conducted by the National Woman
Christian Temperance Union)
FOR PROHIBITION NOW.
,OoO~O-0-o-o-~-o-o0-oooo

Mr.. Alexander Nesbit has been sher-
didn't vote for prohibition. Here are
some of the many things he said about
the good effects of the law in an in
terview published in the Pueblo Chief
tain:
'The habitual loafer has disap-
peared. The crowds that used to hang
around the lower end of the city at
free lunch counters have gone. Where,
l haven't the least idea. Like last
summers flies, they just disappeared
Again, the wine rooms are no more
and the after the theater' dinners are
over, There is no place to go except
to the picture shows, and then for a
light lunch and then home, unless
they go to the pool halls. You know
it doesn't take long to get lunch
after the theater now. Few people
say have another en- a glass of water.
other is misnomer in Denver.
Neither do very many people say:
Let's have another lunch and they
get through and go home.
eve haven't had a case of murder
since the first of the year. Our sui
cittes are falling off to great extent;
the mileage OF the ambulance and pa
troll wagon is less than 60 per cent of
what it formerly was; our officers CD
the beats are treated more courteous
ly; there is a better air morally
around the city; the places where
crime was formerly Matched are gone
and the city is better off in every way
so far as its police department and
their work is concerned.
Let me tell you another thing, the
can-rusher, the old soak who came
home with a quarter in his pocket and
sent his eight-year-old, ragged, bare
footed girl to the saloon for can OF
beer and then tossed her crust OF
bread while he swigged the beer and
sra1led at her through his drunken
ness, is no longer a resident of Den
vor. You can't get a photograph of
ore of these fellows In the city"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-07-06

Bacon-An entomologist says white
ants have attacked the lonely home of
an Indian farmer and in short time
have eaten many of the stills and
floors of the house.
Egbert-Looks as if they were try.
ing to eat him out of house and
home"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-07-06
SPEAKING of Croton.

1.-THE Croton river, which furnishes
to New York the greater part of the
water consumed in it's limits, was
named for an Indian chief" explained
the teacher.
"Oh, teacher!" exclaimed one of the
bright boys. 81 always thought the
Croton river was named after bug!"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-07-06
Speakinu His Mind.

Permit me to give you some good
advice said the meddlesome person.
Go ahead" replied the irascibe
man. You can't make me feel any
worse than l do already"
"Oh, if you are going to take it that
way, III keep silent
That's right! Shut up like clam
now and catch me some other time
when you will have better chance tc
spoil my day."
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-07-06
Too True.

"Look-a here, SAM"
yes, Liza"
rs begginnin' to think yer doesr's
love me no more"
Nonsense, Liza; what put dat in
yer head?"
why, yer jus sit thar by the fire
and sees me work"
BLESS yer, Liza! The more l sits
here and sees yer work the more
loves yer, honey"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-07-06
Downright Dishonesty.

Il want to buy an egg-the largest
you have in stock
only one egg, sir?"
Yes. I'm trying to sell six prize
laying hens to friend of mine, and
want the egg for sample of what
they can do"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-07-06
Type Sometimes Met.

'"rhat man believes he is making
history"
YES" replied Senator Sorghum;
"only he thinks history ought to be
one grand autobiography"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-07-06
COMMON SENSE.

If good workman who is sober as
well as industrious is an asset to
the firm that hires him, he is also an
asset to himself. There is no econom-
ic slavery in that. 1t is only ques-
ton of common sense.-Indianapolis
News.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-07-06

ingworse everyda
[ had chills, my head
would ache, ! was
always tired. | could
not walk straight
because of the pain
in myback andl had
pains in my stom-
ach. l went to 3
doctor and he said l
must go under an ,
operation, but J. did
not go. l read in
4bo Danar a bout
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-07-06
Its Qualifications.

"The dove of peace this time will
have to be something of diplo-
matist."
"Well, dove ought to know how to
achieve coup"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-07-06
itemized.

rs your son broken into his college
course YETI"
"Oh, yes. One arm, couple of
ribs. three toes AMI my pockethook
since the last footl all game"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-07-06
Located.

Belle-See Beatrice's new dress2
Beulah--What new dress?
"The one she had on today"
"That awful short one?"
Eyes. it is short, isn't it?"
That's not new dress. That's one
she wore years ago, before she put on
long dresses"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-07-06
Combustion.

is your boy Josh burning midnight
ol?"
Mo-" replied Farmer Corntossel;
but he keeps the gasoline goin about
eighteen hours day"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-07-06
A Dancer

He aspires to be loved for the enc
mics he has made"
And in so doing is liable to be dis
trusted because of the friends he has
sacrificed"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-07-06
ARsrlNENr PHYSICIANS.

The Society of German-Speaking
Abstinent Physicians in 1914 num-
bered 4S6 men, including some of the
most distinguished men in the en-
pire.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-07-06
In No Terror.

That bandit doesn't seem to fear
death"
Not bit. The most fun he gets
is supervising his own funeral an.
nouncements"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-07-06
Slow Movements.

Bill-Where did they get that new
fielder on the college ball nine?
Jill-He's a product of the college
chess club. Can't you see how slow
he is?
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-07-06
Strictly So.

This firm claims it ought to have
an infant industry"
what is it?"
Manufacturing baby ribbon"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-07-06

Flatbush-My wife is quite mannish.
I found her wearing one of my plaid
vests yesterday?
Bensonhurst-Good for her!
I've been suspicious of her ever
snce."
"Why?"
There was one of my cigars in
the pocket and when l found it it
was crushed"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-07-06
Accounted For

Indians are much more stoical in
the face of death than white men,"
"of course, they are. They like
better to dye"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-07-06
Practical Demonstration.

Think of having food dictator
ship!"
You can get used to it. Our cook
has been successfully operating one
for years"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-07-06

He thinks of the supper last evening
That he bought her after the play
He signs with regret-he cannot forget
That 1t means free lunch for today.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-07-06
DIVORCE LABOR FROM LIQUOR.


"The sooner the labor movement
and the labor press divorces itself
from the liquor business, the quicker
real organization will become posi-
ble," says the Galesburg (Ill0 Labor
News. Our movement advocates the
education, the elevation OF. our mem
bership, the securing of better condj-
tions and wages for our membership.
We cannot secure them by affiliating
with the greatest power against them
Another labor paper expresses itself
In much the same strain. It says in
part:
MANY trade-union journals and
dozens of the best-known labor lead
ers in America have come out openly
for prohibition. According to the
Plumbers Journal, the liquor interests
are finding out that a lot of men who
drink whisky won't vote for it. The
locomotive engineers, 10000 strong,
have gone on record for the abolition
Of the liquor traffic"
Mr.. e. ]. Keenan,, president of an or
ganization of dry labor union men in
Ohio, says that with the exception of
the brewery workers and bartenders
every labor union in Cincinnati Is
lined up for prohibition. The follow
ing pledge is used by Mr.. keenan,:
Eve believe the labor movement
will not develop and grow as it should
until the influence of the liquor traffic
Is removed"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-07-06
He-I am looking for trouble.
She-This is so sudden.
Good Advice,

Put not your trust in princes,
'Tis unwise in most of cases;
And it's unsafe to trust in kings
The other fellow may have aces.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-07-06

A new broom sweeps almost as
clean us a straight flush.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-07-06
WOMAN AVOIDS
OPERATION
Medicine Which Made Sur
geon's Work Unnecessary.

Astoria. N. "For two years
ua ASG feejipg iii and took all kinds so Of
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-07-06
NOT INTERESTED.

Did you ever know saloonkeeper
to be invited to speak to the school
children?
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-07-06

The Bible is good book to read. If
you doubt it, brush the cobwebs off
your copy and look into it.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-07-06
Poor AnaniaS!

If Ananias were alive today,
He'd have no chance Tor lame;
As most any man-so women say
Could beat him at his game.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1916-07-06

Miss Antique-So he actually said
he considered me very witty?
Miss Caustique-Not exactly. He
said he could hardly keep from laugh
ing every time he saw you.
The Lynden tribune. [volume] (Lynden, Wash.) 1908-current, 1916-08-31
Poindexter and The People

Six years ago, Miles Poindexter
senate by the great mass of people
who didn't permit themselves 70 De
humbugged by the grandmotherly
stand-pat press. PoindeXter has
voted and worked for the peoples
interests in the Senate, and in spite
of the uproar of the big papers, we
believe the people will send him
back again as their representative.
Poindexter stands for the follow
ing:
For the Republican Party and its
principles; not for its bosses and
machines.
For protection measured by the
declarations of Republican plat
forms; not for tariff excuses in
private interest only.
For tariff on lumber, shin giles
ard agricultural products, as shown
by my wees IN Congress.
Opposed in Congress the effort
of Tawney aud otae' Republicans
tc put lumber on the free list.
For a"iff mission witt
power TO ascertain the extent o.
higher wages ana higher cost OF
production IN the United States oV-
er that in Foreign Countries: and
for a tariff laW providing that such
d ference. when SO found, shall he
TIE tariff rate.
For fair snare by labor of The
benefits Of protection.
For adequate defense OF he
properly, lives "nG lights of Ano /
can citizens throughout the world.
The Lynden tribune. [volume] (Lynden, Wash.) 1908-current, 1916-08-31
A Worthy Trio

Keep TIE following names il
mind when voting for State Off
GERS:
ARTHUR w. DAVIS, lieutenant
,overnor, progressive in politics
supported 1y boti i'rogressives 3nt
regglars, and endorsed heartily h!
II. Rosenzwe.g, for:lcrly pab'isae
oil The Tribune.
w. H. FORD, secretary of state
Ford s hche is in lington, Sno
LClnish County. A fiue type of ci,i
zen, belonging TO NJ political ring
NJ. E. DURHAM. superintendent
OF public instruction. AT present
superintendent of King Count.
schools, with a record that recon-
mends him for The position.
The Lynden tribune. [volume] (Lynden, Wash.) 1908-current, 1916-08-31
,1R ,c PRESS LEss THAN PUBLIC PUBLIC TRUST

voters who eve familiar with his rec
ord as a county employee. AS aud
itor, he has given the public eff
cient. business-likc service; 1.-The
best official Whatcon County has,
Is phrase often attached 20 his
name.
Now that foolish law automat-
ically terminates his term as audit
or, the county IS fortunate in nav
ing a chance to retain him In an
OF e.. department. He should be
given the Republican nomination fol
sheriff without question.
The Lynden tribune. [volume] (Lynden, Wash.) 1908-current, 1916-08-31

TIE railroad employees who are
planning on striking should be ARE
frl. If they so out, Trey will make
the owners of stages and auto
trucks in Whatcom County mighty
sore.
The Lynden tribune. [volume] (Lynden, Wash.) 1908-current, 1916-08-31

FOR COVERING CHICKEN HOUS-
ES, putting under carpets, pack
ing, etc, we have big bundles of
heavy wrapping paper for sale at
five cents a bundle. THE TRIB-
UNE.
The Lynden tribune. [volume] (Lynden, Wash.) 1908-current, 1916-08-31
THE Best Official

The petty stoiln that has been
raised over the candidacy of VIII
Wallace FOO sheriff las not affected
il. the least his standing viii the
The Lynden tribune. [volume] (Lynden, Wash.) 1908-current, 1916-08-31

Next Monday i; Labor Day, and
e,ybody hereaboUts, except The
bank employees, will.
The Lynden tribune. [volume] (Lynden, Wash.) 1908-current, 1916-08-31

Chinese nuts are being sold Oh
the Pacific Coast as Oregon Wa
nuts, which is a disreputab!e sort
of shell game.
The Lynden tribune. [volume] (Lynden, Wash.) 1908-current, 1916-08-31

rs mighty hard to cast a lecOnd
choice wee for some CT these candi.
The Lynden tribune. [volume] (Lynden, Wash.) 1908-current, 1916-08-31

dates, when ole hasn't first
choice.