Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1916-11-13

II NEVER shall get used TO Dicky. DO
i not know half the time whether he Is
In fun or In earnest When after my ex-
pertinent In smoking a cigarette 10 please
announced that he wanted 20 have serious
financial discussion with me. was fright.
ened l wondered n he we're IN any trouble
which he had not told me-
My face must have told its own story
OF anxiety for suddenly Dieky laughed.
"Dopt worry" he said gayly. IT haven't
lost me diamonds and | am not a ruined
man You seem TO have set your heart
upon that allowance thing, so I thought
we would get II over with. How much do
you want each week7"
why Dioky how can tell. when I
have no idea what your income isG
know vaguely, OF course, that you must
| have no Idea of how much you receive
each week, or month, and must know that
to make out my budget"
Your what7" Dicky looked mystihed.
My budget" I repeated my use OF
the expenditures | expect to make during
based upon the amount OF money l receive
and that IN turn must be reeked on your In
come"
what plfier' retorted Dicky. How can
you ever tell what unexpected expenses you
are going to have? guess my income will
stand the strain. I'll tell you what, you tell
me how much you have spent this last
week, then / will double IL. / will give you
that much each week. II you run behind
will make up the deheit II you haze
more than S20 any week you must treat me
to little dinner. There's q sporting propo'
stion for you. Will you take it?'
MAKING A BUDGET IMPOSSIBLE
"Dlely," I said in despair, "won't you try
to understand? We ought to govern our
expenditures by your income, not by what
your generosity would hand out TO me.
Household economists have worked the
schedules all out so much income, so mueh
saved, so much for rent. 80 much Tor
food"
"Pollcew howled Dicly jumping from his
chair, while / stared In amazement i've
heard all that rot before, but never
thought I'd have to see my meals regulated
that way supppse when you get your
budget worked out that " l happen 10
crave a porterhouse on n day when corned
beef and cabbage Is budgeted, the STEAK
win be among the missing when the roll OF
eatables is called -
He looked so bewildered and woebegone
that l laughed in spite OF the annoyance !
felt that a fullgrown man could elther o.
or pretend to be, so dense.
"I have a faint idea, Dichy, that your IN
come would warrant the strain OF an oeca,
sional porterhouse and the elimination oil
corned beef from the menu unless you par
| ticularly wanted IT," ] said, ironieaiy;
| "But why don't you give me some iusa v.
what your income Is? Then ! could tel you
what my budget would De; - ,,,.,,,, ,,,,,h
| I knew that / was Irritating Dicby WIFI
this relteration. but if ] were TO run my
| housekeeping upon an allowance basis q.
| ali knew no other way than the one : nAu
| outlined | have mlsgivings also apout my
| own ability to keep Within pudBe,, espe-
ciaily with Katie In the kitchen. She was
| a GOOD cook and a competent maid, but
| had observed little things that maze me
| auspect she was both lavish In her use OF
| things and wasteful as to the remnants OF
| food left uneaten. The promise OK economy
| in her regime, which | had hugged 10 ny
| heart when she had accompanied me &c
| market had not been fulfilled.
| Dicl<y voiced my thought "You'l nave
| sweet time keeping within a budget with
| our Polish friend in the kitchen Katie ano
| mean MissIs Graham? A budg-it? Me nc
know dot. Me feex nice dinner, no bodde'
| dot budg-it.'
my INCOMES BIG ENOUGH"
| His imitation OF Katle's probable be
| wilderment was so lifelife that ! lay bacl
| in my chair convulsed with laughter bu
| I did not lose sight Of the fact that mus
| finish this discussion with Dlcky while M
was in the mood for 1t. So came pecf
again to my original proposition. This tint
| / tried coaxing.
"Dicky boy please listen. ! am awfullS
in earnest about this and ] don't want t'
bother you again about u. But won't vol
tell me what your income is, and then
can have something to work upon"
| "MadRe your talents are wasted around
here. As a collector for an installmen
house or an investigator of the income ta'
you ought to be worth your weight In gold
But YOU can't drag any secrets from me
for there are none TO drag. Sometimes ny
| income is zero for a week or two
He paused dramatically. and looked a
me closely, evidently expecting that l would
show signs of dlsmay. But l knew hin
well enough to walt calmly for the rest 0
his words.
"And sometimes have had check
amounting to a thousand good iron men be
tween the first and the thirty-first."
II was my turn to look bewildered. ~
thousand iron men?" / queried doubtfully
"I beg a thousand 'pardons. l will ex
plain. One iron man is one dollar on
thousand times one dollar, or one thousap
dollars Do go to the head of the class
'You do" j replied III ] understoo
you correctly, sometimes your income is on
| Thousand dollars a month. sometlmes moth