The Alaska citizen., 1916-07-31

{ he saw that Jacob was lame. Jacob came walking in like this. with a regular Richard III limp" said Sunday giving an imitation of the limp.
 Abruptly dropping the Jacob and Esau story after saying that "whis- key-soaked Kansas City" would be better off if it spent night with God, as Jacob did. Sunday took crack at infidelism.
 Tt doesn't take any brains to be an infidel," he cried. q want to tell you all the greatest men this country ever had were protesting Christians. Washington prayed at Valley Forge. Lincoln prayed at the White House while the battle of Gettysburg was being fought. Mo kinley was man of prayer. Roose- welt, that giant of the west, was not ashamed to take his Bible to church and lead a prayer meeting. Bryan. clean as a hounds tooth. is Christian. Champ Clark is a man of prayer who loves God Presi- dent Wilson prays twice day Secretary Daniels and other mem | bers of the cabinet are also men of prayer"
 1 There were cheers for every name mentioned except for that of Sec retary Daniels.
 Kinds of Prayers. ] And you" said Sunday. swinging 1 his arms, how do you feel-you with your little cigarette that would smoke a polecat out of it's hole You think you can get along with out prayer don't you? Cold prayer won't do, either. You've got to talk to God like you meant it. l knew a little girl, and they had company for dinner, and the little girl leaned over to her mamma and said: Nam that funny little noise in his throat? She meant when he was going to say grace. When some folks bow their heads to pray they look like jack rabbits eating alfalfa.
 There was a little boy and girl out walking one day and a sheep got after them. The little boy said,
 Sister, hadn't we better kneel down and pray?' And she said: No. you fool, we'll pray while we're running Of course this caused a laugh and then Sunday added to the merriment this way:
 And do you know the only prayer that little boy could think of was: o Lord, for that which We are about to receive make us duly thankful
 Practical Prayers.
 Pray while you're running. You don't have to get down on your knees to pray. You can make every act of your life a prayer Look neat. l don't mean you must wear a Tuxedo, or a Prince Albert all the time. I don't mean you must wear silks and satins all the time, but l do mean that you cant be a good Christian and go around the house dressed In a Mother Hubbard that makes you look like a feather bed with a string tied around it.
 And you men, listen to me. Stop growing at home. If you growled that way in q restaurant or a hotel they'd throw you out on your ear. Stop being a liar, a bear wolf and a hog and praise your wife once in a while, you old brutes, If you want your wife to be an angel, treat her like an angel She'll get young again.
 Love is the greatest thing in the world It's like lightning You never know where it's going to strike. An old maid of 65 was asked if she was married and she replied. Not yet You see there's always | | hope. There is a woman for every man, and if you haven't got yours, it's not her fault. And when you do get her. for Gods sake treat her right. Don't choose a wife be- cause she is good worker. That's the way you'd buy mule His Tribute to Women. Then follwed this unusual apos- ! trophe to woman: Woman! She has knitted mittens for the Eskimos, and made bas- kets for the Hottentots, she has cooked the oyster soup. beans and sponge cake that has kept thousands | of steeples from falling and she has