Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1916-06-01
A Joke That
Nliscarriied
By ETHEL HOLMES

Jim and John Emerson, twin broth
ers, dressed alike as they looked alike.
They wore their boards alike, and their
voices were as nearly the same as two
violins. They were married on the
same day and went to live in twin
houses in Atherton terrace Every one
said that there was nothing unlike
about the brothers except their wives.
One day while they were lunching to-
gether at the Downtown club they con-
Guided to swap wives for dinner. Jim
was to go home to Johns house, pre-
tending to be John, and vice versa. The
pretense, if successful, was to last till
coffee was brought on, when John and
his brothers wife We're to go into Jim's
and all have coffee together and laugh
over what had taken place.
When John Emerson, personating
Jim, went to Jim's house that after
noon shortly before the dinner hour
he received the connubia kiss from his
brothers wife, and, so far as he could
discover, she thought him her husband
''Any letters?' he asked casually
Yes she said, handing him one adj
dressed in a feminine hand, while she
looked up into his face as he read the
superscription.
John was somewhat taken aback.
He did not know whether the epistle
was one his brother would wish his
wife to see or not Giving 1t a casual
glance, he put it in his coat pocket I'M
opened and asked If the wife had spent
the day pleasantly.
Mrs. Jim did not ask when he had
pocketed letter in which she was
deeply interested who was the writer,
for she had studied the handwriting
on the envelope and could not make
out that it belonged to any woman she
knew, but her replies to Johns re-
marks We're not cordial, and it was evil
dent that there was something on her
mind. John endeavored to appear I'M
concerned, but he was obliged to admit
that the letter incident had caused an
unfortunate turn in his and his broth
er's joke.
The more John tried to placate his
sister-in-law the more implicated she
became. By the time the dessert came
on the table she was sitting bolt up
right in her chair looking very crusty.
Meanwhile her husband was dining
with his brothers wife. Jim, who
was an excellent business man, had
made money while John, whose tastes
were artistic, had not. Mrs. John was
economical, and her principal business
was to keep her husband from spend
ing more than his limited income war
ranted. 1t had occurred to Jim that
this occasion would be a good one to
make his sister-in-law present So
on his way to dinner he stopped at
jewelers. and bought a brooch, for
which he paid $50. After receiving
the homecoming kiss he drew the box
containing his gift, opened it and held
the brooch before the lady's eyes.
"See what have brought you, dear"
Mrs. Emerson's brows lowered In
stead Of putting her coral fingers on
the brooch she pushed it away from
| her.
"Why in the world did you spend
money for that trinket when have
all can do to make ends meet without
it? Tomorrow morning you take it
right back and leave it where you
got it,
Poor Jim looked very much disgrun-
tied. He could not confess that he
was her brothef-in-law instead of her
/ J.,
her He stammered an apology, put
the brooch in his pocket, adding that
he "was very sorry" and took up the
evening paper. Fortunately dinner
was announced, and he hoped to get
through it without anything more dis
agreeable than what had already hap
| pened.
Thus the joke that was intended to
be pleasant one, to be laughed over
after dinner, miscarried. John had u
letter in his pocket that he dared not
open for fear Of compromising his
brother, and Jim stood accused of
wasteful extravaganza. All through
the dinner Jims sister-in-law was de-
claiming against his want of ability
to keep within bounds. 1t was no ex-
cuse whatever that he had intended
the gift for her. A gift that troubled
her to pay for by skimping was no
| gift at all. Indeed, it was detriment.
About 7:30 by the clock Jim Emer-
son was called to the telephone
''Is that you, Jim?'
Eyes"
There's been fiasco here"
There's been one here too"
"The trouble is letter received by
the morning mail addressed to you in
woman's handwriting"
'The trouble here Is that / brought
your wife fifty dollar brooch as a
gift purporting to come from you and
have been abused for extravaganza"
"Tell her the truth and come over at
/ once"