davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Birmingham age-herald., 1916-10-03

Former American football stars are giving a good account of themselves in tho trenches Of EuroIe. although the op- portunities for end runs are somewhat limited.
 Tlmmins will go down in history as the only American tug that ever lowed a German undersea merchantmen into port. Naturally, these piping times of peace are rather trying on the colonel, who had visions of cleaning up Mexico at the head of h.s admiring troops.
 "snookum," says an advertiser, is an Indian word that means bully" Now we know the meaning of "snookum Jim's' name.
 still in fighting mood over the eight hour law. It takes that man a long time to cool off.
 A discharged hotel employe in Chicago fought pistol battle with policemen, in stead Of trying to bring about a walters strike.
 Sheriff Puckett, who captured overton, reads the papers. There's an official who will not be caught mapping.
 The old-fashioned boy who wanted to be a minstrel man has a son who is going to be military aviator.
 Nearly everything else has gone up, but it is still possible to take a long trolley ride for nickel. According to Anna Held's latest photo graphs, she doesn't look a day older Wonderful woman. College football teams are rounding into condition to "strafe" their rivals on the gridiron. *
 If Secretary Redfield resigns. his luxu- riant whiskers will be missed from the cabinet.
 The circus poster in Dixie land merely emphasizes the fact that autumn has arrived
 
 The dove of peace seems to have taken up her permanent abode at the city hall.
 H <
 Mobile never knows when it is going to receive a new cargo of wet goods, i,
The Birmingham age-herald., 1916-10-03

ted American democracy for American democracy, has by fate's irony enjoyed his greatest appreciation at the hands of an English literary artisocracy who we're willing to look beyond the "good gray poets" formless verse to its real mes sage. Symonds, Dowden and Stevenson celebrated his genius. George Moore called him the greatest American liter ary figure. Ambros Bierce is another American author whose work has re- ceived far louder plaudits in England than in his native country.
 o. Henry has not been neglected bs his countrymen. His genius has been rec ognized by that infallible touchtone-his works have been sold by subscription But at no time, not even immediately after his death, did we rise to the extent of praise that the Englishman is now meeting out to O. Henry. He is placed with Kipling, de Maupa ssant and Coppee, immortals of the short story. Literary critics are seeking to determine which of his many tales is his masterpiece The extent of the discussion may be appre- ciated from the number of stories sug- gested. Fifteen tales of this American Nights entertainment have been men tioned in the English periodicals that have come to our notice, for the place of honor in O. Henry's gallery.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1916-10-03
LUKE M'LUKE SAYS

Some preachers insist that we are mere worms Maybe we are. But we have sense enough to hang onto the butt end of the fishing tackle.
 The wages of sin is death. And there's one pay day no man is a1X- ious to see come around.
 When we hear a man bragging about his charity, we size him up as the kind of fellow who drops a nickel into a blind mans tin cup and then takes two pencils out of the blind mans hat
 If you want to get in bad with a woman just tell her that her new dress or her new hat looks sensible.
 When some men join a lodge they take the next day off and practice the signal of distress.
 the last to find it out. But it is diff ferent with a married man.
 It affords a lazy man heap of sat isfaction to quote the fact that the United States supreme court is two years behind in it's work.
 Between the knee-length skirts ant the invisible stockings, Jack Frost i. going to have some fun with the deal things this winter.
 A man who doesn't drink, but wht is incorporate in everything else, like. to attend temperance lecture becaus, he knows that the speaker is going t, whale the tar out of the poor fools ant degenerates who take a nip of booz, now and then.
 It makes a woman who has raised dozen children snort with indignation when 2 highly educated old maid trie to tell her that babies do not cut thei teeth but cut their gums No girl is as good as she looks whel she is wearing her bridal veil. Any newspaper editor can tell yol | that there are a whole lot of colleg men in this country who can neithe spell nor punctuate.
 | The reason why some society wom en haven't any children is because the, gad so much that the stork never find | them at home.
 l The best way to keep out of fights i | to get a reputation as a fighter. | small boys idea of an angel is | woman who never cuts a pie into les
 than four pieces
The Birmingham age-herald., 1916-10-03

that they ever quarreled at all, now that
 peace reigns in the house again, she has
 not forgotten.
 There still fingers in her mind the feeAs
 ing that he never really understood her,
 that he never understood her problems
 and her struggles, and that he never will. And it seems to me further that, as is
 usually the case with wives who consider
 themselves misunderstood, the fault is partly, but by no means altogether. hers. He, upon one hand. is inclined to pass the matter off with a: There, theres It's all over now. Just be good and for get it!" while she, in the depths of her
 heart, retains little bit of witfulness, a little hurt feeling which causes her to say to herself: Thank God our home was
 not broken up. but-I wish that he could be little more considerate of my feel ings, sometimes, in view of all that I have suffered"
 For my part I am the humble but de-
 voted friend of the family. Having known
 him first. having been from boyhood his ! companion, may perhaps have sympa- thized with him in the beginning. But since have come to know her, too, that
 is no longer so.
 And do think I know her-proud, sen sltive, high strung generous, captivat- ng beauty that she is! Moreover, after
 the fashion of many another friend of | the family" have fallen in love with
 her. Loving her from afar, I send her as
 nosegay these chapters gathered in her own gardens. If some of the flowers are of kind for which she does not care l If some have thorns, even if some are only weeds, I pray her to remember that | from what was growing in her gardens I was forced to make my choice and to believe that, whatever the defects of my bouquet it is meant to be a bunch of roses
The Birmingham age-herald., 1916-10-03

From the Kansas City Star.
 OR F HAT has become of the star
 WW actor? Twenty, thirty, forty
 years ago there were so many stage favorites. so many theat- rical stars of the first magnitude, that there was a different one for each week of the season; and new stars were appearing on the theatrical hor- izon each year.
 Now those old favorites of the 'Ie- gitimate" drama have practically all disappeared; Sothern and Marlowe and Robert Mantell were for about a decade almost the last survivors, and now even they have dropped out. For 10 or 15 years we have realized that there was no new, line of great actors com ing up to take the places of the old ones who were disappearing; and to- day you cannot look anywhere and see a young man or woman promis- ing enough to fill the places of Soth- ern or Marlowe in the field of their long activities.
 Theatrical folk say there is combi- nation of reasons for it, the chief three
 or WnlCH are. lTSL. commencement VI
 the stage; second, vaudeville; third, motion pictures They assert that when
 control of the American stage fell into the hands of several monopolists who cared only for money, who built or bought strings and circuits of theatres in different cities and then sent out companies and plays designed only to hA rn VIZ s rung on the old-time star and the old-time classical play. The sensa- tional was striven for. The problem play, the play that came just within the law, and not always within the Mine of decency. was the one that "got the coin" The nonsense play, with plenty of pretty girls and lots of laughs could be counted on to pay. Gradual ly those plays. with comedians re- cruited from the varieties and vaude- ville took the place of stars whose name used to be sufficient to fill the house.
 Vaudeville became popular all over the country. It gave an interesting performance for a low price and hit | the old-tine star terrific blow. Many of the stars went into vaudeville, and when they later tried to re-enter the legitimate they found that the public (which had seen them for 10. 20 and 30 cents on the vaudeville stage would not pay $1 and g to see them.
 Motion pictures put the finishing touches to the business and gradually | the old timers went Into them. The re. l cent advent of Sothern in the movies is the last straw.
 1 So, for years there have been no in. duccments for new actors of ability tc i seek tho speaking stage. because 1,
 has been declining business. The pic. l ture shows have sent no good actors to the speaking stage. Motion picture . stars are not actors; they are panto,
 mimists. and many of the best of then
 are incapable of properly reading aloud the English language,
 ! Whats to be tho outcome with tn,
 "Rialto" making a jump across thu
The Birmingham age-herald., 1916-10-03
A TRIBUTE TO SOUTH

Julian Street in Golfers Weekly
 Though much has been written or the south, it seems to me that this part or our country is less understood than any other part. Certainly the south, itself, feels that this is true. It's relationship to the north makes me think Of nothing so much as that of pretty, sensitive wife to big, strong, ambiable, if some what thick-skinned husband. These two had one great quarrel which nearly re- suited in divorce. He thought her head strong; she thought him overDearing' The quarrel made her i'll; she has been for some time recovering. But though they have settled their difficulties and are living again in amity together ana though he. manliks. has half forgotten
The Birmingham age-herald., 1916-10-03
THE STARS OF YESTERYEAR

continent from New York to Los An geles, where the film companies have their cities of props and stage set tings?
 We sigh for the old days, the old actors. the old plays. or some success sors to them, just as good. Annie Pix ley in Miss" James A. Hearne in Hearts of Oak" and Shore Acres" Sol Smith Russell. Rosina vokes, Lot ta, Maggie Mitchell, Frank Mayo. Ada Rehan, Fannie Davenport, Mary An derson. Elsie DeWolf. Marie Vain wright. Hilda Clark, Pauline Hall. Ma rie Jansen, Camille d'Arville, Dorothy Morton, Denman Thompson, Joe Mur- phy, Tim Murphy. Lewis Morrison Booth, Barrett. Mccullough, to bunch them all. with their varied taleuNs and a host of others, are gone. all oi them from the stage, some dead. soms retired in comfort, many, like old Tony 'Denier, living In poverty. their profes sion gone, themselves almost forgot ten and none coming on to succeAe them.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1916-10-03
A COURSE IN JANIToRsHIp
,m the Providence Journal.

From the Providence Journal.
 A western college has started a course in janitorship. Well, if the apartment house is destined to be the ultimate city type of dwelling, why not offer expert instruction in the duties of the man on whom to a very large extent the comfort and convent ence of the occupants depend?
 Our social arrangements are rapidly changing. Domestic service is under going a distinct altera ation-not to say revolution. Old methods are being re- placed by new. Why not an improved janitor system?
 The remarkable thing about this pio- neer course in janitorship is that it is offered by Iowa State college, which is situated at Ames, country town of little more than 4000 inhabitants at the last census It seems as if one of the New York city institutions might have been the first to make such an addition to the American scientific curriculum.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1916-10-03
Unusual Record

s.There is a. waiter in a restaurant in Birmingham who holds record In the marriage game that I think is without a peer" said Avery Joseph yesterday This man is just 20 years old. He is the father of a 5-year-old child and is living with his second wife.
 There may be others who know of g more remarkable case, but I believe that this is without an equal. When he was 15 years old he married woman of 20 After few years she died, leaving him with young child. He recently mar ried the second time.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1916-10-03
FISH WASTE

From the New York Telegram
 Nearly 12o,Oo0 tons of valuable stec and poultry food high in protein cssi D produced annually from the wastes o the salmon and sardine packing indus tries, and of the menhaden fish oil an fish scrap factories on the coasts. Thi is exclusive of additional wastes fror the tuna packing companies and does no include a large additional tonnage o valuable stock food that could be mad from dog fish, now the bane of the mal ket fisherman. This statement Is mad ir United States department of agricu| tLre professional paper No. SIS, FYs Meal: It's Use As a Stock and PoultrI Food" which was issued jointly by tn bureaus of chemistry and animal indus try after they had completed experimen, in making a stock feed from fish vast and had tested it at the government farj at Beltsville. Md, as a food for daid cattle. pigs and chickens.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1916-10-03
Decrease in Matrimony

The number of marriage licenses issued in September, which numbered 157, show a decrease for the district, according to Probate Clerk Woolsey Morrow, which he is unable to explain.
 1T do not know just why the boys are not getting marriage licenses as frequent ly as in the past" said Clerk Morrow, except that the times must be hard. Still that cannot be the reason, as every body is talking about how prosperous ev- erything s so I think that the boys are just bashful. Only 157 took the step into natrimony last month. which is several below the average"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1916-10-03
ONE TEST OF CHRISTIANITY

From "A Circuit Riders Widow" by
 Cora Harris in the Saturday Even
 ing Post.
 I have observed this, that the most corrupt people, the coldest rationalists, the atheists and agnostics. always elect to live in Christian communities. Our shortcomings and hypocrisies do not produce these unfortunate and de- formed spirits, but they seek the light of our illusions. the foolishness of our faith. as an antidote for their own darkened wisdom. Nobody ever heard of community composed only of these clements holding together. because such people cannot bear one another not for half the life length of one lit- tie village church.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1916-10-03
SISTERS IN SORROW

From the Westminster Gazette. We never roamed one garden world tI
 gether.
 Nor shared the glory of fields lost al
 won,
 Nor comrades tramped tho stubble or tl
 heather,
 Nor saw the dawn arise on great tas1
 done Net We are friends. for each has Id
 @ son. We never walked with arms round 9I
 another Nor played in secret some dear endld game Unknown to each, each loved. was VII
 and mother. Prayed far apart, shared neither pra nor blame
 We knew not we were friends. until came.
 "This sword that severed past days fir tomorrow, We almost thought the cruel messs lied.
 This pank that left us only God and k(. row You and here. they on the other <sid| We knew not we were friends, u&
 they died"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1916-10-03
Treat. Crooks Kindly

''The crooks like us,'' said Charles G. Kimzel, the postoffice inspector who fur nished the clue that enabled the authori- ties to convict the band of train rob- bers lead by Jeff Harrison. "One would imagine that the criminals who are caught by us would hate and utterly de- spise us But such is not the case.
 "The government detectives treat the crooks kindly. We do all that we gan tc make them comfortable, and. at times urge the courts to be lenient with them. They often tell us that since It was neces- sary for them to be caught, that they were glad that 1t was by a government agent"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1916-10-03
Knocks and Jokes

You can hear plenty of knocks and jokes about the Ford automobiles, but l prefer a flivver any day to any other automobile" said pr. J. c. Mcdaniel, yesterday. T have been using one Ford automobile for about three years, and have ridden it for over 6O,0oo miles through several southern states, and very seldom have any trouble with 1t.
 '"The repairs on my Ford will not av- craze $ per month and my oil and gas oline bill is about $12 per month. This is great deal cheaper than having horse and buggy. The only advantage of hav- ing a horse is that it is seldom stolen, as Fords are''
The Birmingham age-herald., 1916-10-03
POOLING THE INSECTS.

Whoever stuffed that dog for you is an expert taxidermist."
 "Yes. The fellow made an excellent job of it. My wife vows she found fleas on this relic of poor Fido"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1916-10-03
BOWIE DOING GooD WORK
Mobile Register.

From the Mobile Register.
 Hon. Sydney J. Bowie of Birmingham Is doing good work in his addresses sup porting the educational amendment. What is most needed by the people is information as to the object of the amendment. When uniformed. the peo- pie are for it. The Mobile trades coun- ell. that listened to MT. Bowie's address, heartily indorsed the amendment, by passing resolution to that effect.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1916-10-03
New Lenses Popular

"The new WarnerLenz which we are introducing in Birmingham has scored a tremendous success with local automobile owners said K. D. Andrews of the Elec- tric Battery company yesterday. For a long time, automobile owners have felt the need for lens to take the place of the old style ones which gave binding, glaring light which was objectionable to pedestrians and other motorists and which have been prohibited by city and state authorities in many places. Then when the lights were dimmed, they were practically useless except for parking purposes.
 "Our Warner-Lenz way gives pene- trating yet soft and mellow light without binding and without any glare. We have already installed number of these lenses on the city fire trucks and they have proved highly satisfactory for this serv7 ice. The sales are increasing constantly and every owner Is really worker for this new lens system. I believe it is only a matter of time until practically every automobile owner will have his car equipped with these lenses"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1916-10-03
HOTEL LOBBIES
AEe-Hernld Get. Rerults

''rhe Age-Herald certainly does get re- sults." said S 4. Williams of the Will Hams Suit company. now doing business on Third avenue. As a consequence of my advertising in The Age-Herald. have had a big business and am nightly pleased with the results.
 Judging from the sales that l have made and the number of times that the customers have mentioned the fact that they saw the advertisement in The Age Herald, I know of no medium that could give more satisfaction to it's patrons.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1916-10-03
ADRTFT WITH THE TIMES
A JOYOUS THOUGHT.

When autumn breezes start to blow
 And poets yield themselves to rhyme, Expressing temp ramental woe,
 Or else an ecstasy sublime, The colored brothers glad to know
 He's on the verge of 'possum time.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1916-10-03
COMMON FAILING.

COMMON FAILING. The Germans say the British tanks are not so much" That's the way with most people, What do you mean?" When they hate other persons the first thing they think about is dis paraging their motor cars."'
 INTENSIVE POEM.
 Moving day,
 Shake the rugs.
 Deep dismay.
 Heavens! Bugs!
The Birmingham age-herald., 1916-10-03

BEGINNING THE DAY-"Lord' rhou hast been our asylum in all renerntions.. In all the ages or the world, in all chimes, among nit peo- pIes, | see men fleeing to the oos"m of God for refuge. In persecuuoh' In doubt, in fear, in sickness, in tne shadow of death, they have sousn. Him ms their asylum. And with all the children of this pilgrimaee, | would come also, nay Lord anu @s God. Amen.--H. M. E.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1916-10-03
CLOSE SCRUTINY.

Mrs. Jibway neglected her house work scandalously yesterday"
 What was the natter"
 Three new families moved into the neighborhood. That kept her glued to a window all day"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1916-10-03
Hot Campaign in Shelby

While the eyes of the nation are cen- tered on the issues between the candi- dates for the presidency, and few signs of partisan politics are noted in Ala bana, Shelby county is having her own taste of party politics" said Charlie Mc- Lane, superintendent of the Saginaw Lime works and candidate for the board of revenue of that county on the demo- cratic ticket. Politics probably is warmer in Shelby county now than in many years.
 Shelby county is one of the strongest anti-democratic counties in the state, but for the last few years the democras have been gaining ground rapidly, until it has narrowed down to a close fight every elecion year. Each party is struggling for the master-hand, and political meet ings and speeches are the order of the day."
The Birmingham age-herald., 1916-10-03
READY.

is going to stump 12 suffrage states"
 1T dare say she will be greeted by large crowds"
 "What makes you think so?"
 At this time of year nearly every woman has bought a new outfit for autumn and winter
The Birmingham age-herald., 1916-10-03
THE MAIN THING.

To live this life and never fret
 Is rather hard to do, But men who're wise will bravely set Their hearts on pulling through"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1916-10-03

UNUSUAL I saw a thing the other day, A thing that's worth recounting; saw drug store, strange to say, Without a soda founting. -Kee Maxwell, in Peoria Journal. Unless you say that it's ''no fair'' Into this game butt I saw a barber cutting hair Who had no hair to cut.
 Judd Lewis, in Houston Post. I bought some chestnuts not long since, And this can affirm. Fen though the story makes you
 vince;
 didn't find a worm. Charley Leedy, in Youngstown Tele- gram.
 There was a tramp the other day Within my vision lurking, And this same tramp was drawing pay Because he had been working.
 -Pittsburg Post. saw sight the other day, And one, I'm told, not often seen, chorus beauty young and gay Who didn't own limousine.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1916-10-03
Wanted a "DoIo.,

"One of the funniest things occurred the other day that I have seen in long time," said Felix M. Drennen. We em- ploy at our soda fountain the only girl soda water dispenser in Birmingham, Miss Iva Board. When she started in the business the other soda water slingers, all of whom are boys, all over town, were rather peeved and they put up a Joke on her one day. Miss Board is as bright as a dollar and they didn't get ahead of her. A bunch of young fellows came in and, sauntering up to the foun- tain, one of them asked for a 'dolo.' Miss Board looked puzzled for moment and said: What is it you want? The reply was repeated: "A dolo.' She thought for a moment and then she said quick as lightning: T get you kid; what you want is beer; we are out today. Call again! v
The Birmingham age-herald., 1916-10-03

o. mems vows are wOmen's traitors
 -CymbeIine. k
The Birmingham age-herald., 1916-10-03

Entered at the Birmingham, Ala, postofrice as second class matter under act of Congress March 3, 1879.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1916-10-03
NUCLEUS. ANYHOW.

What sort of town is Chiggers- ville?"
 "It boasts of ghetto"
 ''Nonsenseg'
 "Its a fact. A Russian immigrant settled in the town last month, with his wife and IA children"
The Birmingham age-herald., 1916-10-03

NOT A HOPELESS CASE. "You say your life is empty and without purpose?
 That's the way feel,'' replied the pessimistic person.
 '"rhe, why don't you go in for uplift work and be a professional reformer?" "oh. I'm not quite disgruntled enough for that"