The Washington times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1902-1939, 1916-11-17
TIMES DAILY MAGAZINE PAGE
Americans Learn
Three Languages

Inc aIkenunes speak spanish tongue
Brazilians Portuguese.
And after several weeks or so
l got quito tired OF these.
longed to get to London town
Where English she is spoke"
And get" every "bloke."
Alas! I am In London town.
stroll along the Strand.
But ! don't comprehend their talk
Ana they don't understand.
would were in old New York
Where oyery child and man
Knows how and when and where to talk
GOOD straight American.
LONDON, Nov. 2 (by maiD.
WE Americans really ought to learn
wv three foreign languages, French,
spanish. and English.
" course, In other countries II helps
a DIT when You don't speak the native
tongues to .gestlculate wildly and talk
with your hands You can't hand out
anything like this in London, though,
and get away with II, indeed your handy
footless.
After several desperate attempts
a. a. teIeRnone conversations when
you have a weak sort OF feeling that
perhaps you aren't all there after all.
The other day went out shopping.
TO explore the secrets of the home.
mere Is what wanted to get. A pad
to put under a table cloth (you know,
We call them silence cloths back in
Lawrence, Kan.), yard of chiffon,
nve yards of cheese cloth, a new
suit. some, samples for an evening
S Sown' . = PAR OF garters, a pair OF
oilcloth, and a spool Of thread.
D.s.. NIytII "a
AT tea time I returned wild-eyed
but triumphant, with a bump sheet,
a. yard of ninon, Ave yards OF butter
cloth, a costume, some patterns for
an evening gown, a pair OF suspend
ers, pair OF preservers. a half yard
OF American cloth, a reel OF cotton.
reel?
Perhaps you think you know a
slice OF ham when you see one, per
haps you are reasonably sure you
know a slice OF ham when you taste
one. All, yes. but nothing could be
rasher than for you TO insist that you
know a slice of ham when you hear
one In London town except that little
old "rasher OF CANNON" itself. Now
the next time you hear anyone say
cannon and spinach" your know
that they're swearing by ham.
When you want a pound OF lard,
sch bVN VI lHIc
commodity comes all neatly packed
away in different sized bladders. You
get tin OF tomatoes for n can OF
tomatoes, and IL you have a cough
YOU get mixture Allied at the
chemists, not a prescription.
Her lemon squash the duchess sat In
differently slipping until she'd used the
muffineer and then she found Il ripping
Which translated means that the OUCH
ess found her lemonade too sour. so she
az tha oh lar ~.
the duchess possessed the true English
figure and didn't have to cut the
"sweets" which, by the way, Is what ali
candy and bonbons are dubbed ovei
here.
Police Regulations Strict.
Because OF war conditions police reg
uiations are very strict here now. and
aliens are required 10 register at the
police station within twenty-four hours
after they hit the town. II you should
change your hotel during your stay you
must needs notify the police and register
all over again. giving your new address.
With the dire threat of being had up
II didn't do II you may be sure
hustled to Bow street. awful visions OF
being hung up by the thumbs or other
slevatlng thoughts whirling I'm my brain
Yet had up" Is merely Londonene fol
'.pinched."
Said his lordshlp to me. said he. "Al
my good men have gone to the front, sc
| only have an old cook for secretary
at present" Now l had heard OF dished'
faced stenoRraphers. but
hooking into my trusty English Amer
lean dictionary | found "Crock-broke'
down horse. old lakeland there you
are!
oh. It is very well that the child ant
the papers are in London, but take II
from me 'twere better TO have an Eng
lish- American dictionary there, too.