White Pine news weekly mining review. [volume] (East Ely, Nev.) 1910-1920, 1916-04-16
.BAR1ENOERS AND
BARRIERS TO CLASH

ening of the loud mouthed and per-
sistent baseball zap. the tapering of
of the basket ball and high ball sea-
sons and the quiescense in football
circles.
Baseball. that we'll known game
played by BARRIERS, bartenders and
ball players in the summer and by
theoretical guys in the winter. will
descend on the city this afternoon.
There will be little conversation
about peace, as the BARRIERS and bar
tenders have become %reconeiled to
war. Both have settled down TO the
enjoyment of a lot of trouble and II
any i'll advised bird comes along with
an olive branch, he is doomed to a
sad and untimely end.
As a social note it might be men
toned that in talkfests both sides
have been taking on titles at all
weights, so they are in the pink of
condition. The men in uniform will
endeavor to make themselves avail
able for purposes of pomp. promin-
ence and publicity.
Having clearly demonstrated by a
series of unique deductions and COM
PARSONS that a baseball game is i'm
pending today, and that 1t is a very
serious matter. there is not much
more left that we can say without
exposing our hand.
A recapitulation and close analysis
of our testimony proves conclusiyely
as follows:
III. That we do not know who is
going to win.
(2). That we hardly even suspect
anything.
We wish to know, of course. We
wish TO know who is going to cop
the bitter struggle. just the same as
We are anxious to ascertain whether
Teddy, the Big Bull Mooser will cop
the cookie at the big republican gath
ering in Chicago next June, having
a deep interest in items of public
veal or woe, but we repeat, we do
not know. Alas, we do not.
Who will win today's disorder?
As a matter of fact, the only per-
sons who know the winners in the
approaching disturbance are the ball
players, and, as they do not agree;
that makes the matter more %confus-
ing.
Personally we might be inclined to
Breen. the pilot of the bar dogs. He
intimates that If optimism were a
blade of grass, his squad would have
a ton of hay. Musiek, the salver for
the hair trimmers. alleges that his
wreckers have what the slang-whack-
ers call a lead pipe skinooch.
Not for anything would they try to
mislead the reading public. but there
is always grave danger of them mis-
leading themselves.
We have tried to solve the problem
by figures. We have taken a lot of
ones twos and threes and showed
them around this way and that, like
anybody and mixed them with deci-
mails and fractions and adjectives and
such, but they always come out look
ing like ones, twos an threes. There
are some people who a take the
same figures and make them lie
down, roll over and speak, which
proves that 1t isn't so much the fig
ures as the handling of them. We
think there will be a game, all right.
The Little Napoleon" among the
ginks that labor in thirst parlors, got
to giving the once Owe and the up
and down to those who will perform
for the BARRIERS this afternoon and he
began to figure: Eyes, great ball
players, when you we're a tadpole and
] was a fish.
81 have been studying the 1915
spring and summer styles in ball
players" said Manager Musick, land
everything is hunkadory. Over my
head there is a shadow of dread-no
terror, no fear. The bar creatures
had better begin shedding the
thought that they are invincible,
They haven't a chance. Like Bill
Bryan's opinions and Willie's dream.
They are slower than the prohibition
party along Aulth-an street. Some
old sea dog once chortled after send
ing a few of the enemy ships to the
briny deep We have met the enemy
and they are ours That's the kind OF
a noise I'm making. If you have ever
seen an elephant tread on a peanut
or a Baldwin locomotive walk over a
grasshopper. you might get the drift,
otherwise yeu are deceived. We ex-
pect q big crowd. You know, we are
not asking the rabid bugs to pay ever
Chinese money to see US In action