davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1916-02-02
THE ELEPHANT.
HOEBrd liam
no 9eoli INK -d cabhe9 es-l Nn&

The elephant is q massive, nat
footed beast with a puncture- proof
hide and coarse, yawning complex
ion. Many attempts have been made
to refine the complexion OF the eie-
phant by applying cold cream and
the patent pimple eradicator, but
without any success whatevr.
Elephants do not grow in this
country TO any extent. as the climate
Ia too severe, but are found In great
abundance in the heart Of Africa by
daring hunters who have left their
wives with ill-concealed relief to
brave the dangers Of the tropical for
est and the deadly rgors Of the Congo
flea. Elephant hunting Is an ak
citing pastime and frequently causes
several deaths to occur far from
home. 1t must be sad to go so far
away in search Of rest and quiet and
then die with a low gurgle as the
result OF being stepped upon by the
hind leg of an infiamed elephant
The elephant is kind animal. and
not go around with chip on it's
sholder. like the uneasy female
lioness. Nobody ever saw an ele-
phant reach out and sink its trunk
into an innocent bystander who had
brought his entire family to the circus
on billboard pass. Yet some people
would rather stand up close to the cage
OF the lioness and watch the swift.sner-
vous play OF her back teeth than to
hang around the elephant and see him
swallow long. curly strands OF timothy
hay.
The elephant is more intelligent than
he appears to be on the surface. being
in this respect much like some OF our
greatest statesmen. A bright, thought.
full elephant can be trained to do near
ly everything that man does ex,eps
drink lemon extract and swear. When
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1916-02-02
Topics Of the Times

There's lot OF fellows figuring on
New Year dinners in Des Moines that
are bound to be as bitterly disap-
pointed as the kaiser was over that lit
tie meal to be eaten in Paris.
1.E. &. HtEg
We Just laid aside the question OF
candidates. and held Mr., Wilson sim
ply president of the United States yes
terday. But next fall is another story.
When the president went round the
table to kiss his wife it was very
human thing 10 do: but it wasn't more
human than the "peeking" Of the wom-
en- who saw him do it.
''The Removal OF the Capital to Dee
Moines," Indian Captivity" and an
article on The Indian Agent" are in
.eces;iIis and valuable contributions to
the Iowa Journal Of History and Poli-
tics of current issue.
$50
If it keeps on growing that AmeS
short course for farmers will challenge
the attendance figures of the state fair.
The Burlington Hawkeye scouts the
led into immortality by poverty. Next
thing the Hawkeye should deny that
starvation ever lead a man to steal or
that desperation affects morals and
human action in any particular.
1t may be that a rot of us take Cliff,
ford Thorne too lightly. 1t is even
more plausible that he takes himself
too seriously.-Sioux City Journal.
However neither the farmer shippers
nor the railways take Clifford Thorne
lightly. They consider him seriously.
Mr.. Thorne is dealing with serious
matters TO the shippers and those who
carry the shipments and seems entire
~ competent to strike a fair balance
between them. None except small men
sneer at Clifford Thorne. The big ones
all take him seriously.
If Senator Larrabee enters the con-
gressioual contest against Hon. Frank
p. Woods it will be fight worth
watching. Webster City Freeman
Tribune.
And If he were to get into the lieu
tenant governorship ring would MI
Moore be able to stay the limit?
So far no opposition TO either Judge
Deemer or Evans seems to have de-
But if a half dozen or so OF
conditions under the non-partisan plan
were to arise some skate might breal. ,
thru and land just the same on pitt
full minority of Iowa votes. - |
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1916-02-02
Pension. TO Pastors,

What disposition a people makes OF
its old and unproductive members de-
ponds much on it's type Of civilization.
Certain OF the aboriginal American In
dian tribes. finding themselves bur-
dened with old folks whose knees were
weak and teeth past repair, were to
escort them to the timber and toma-
hawk them into the Happy Hunting
Grounds. When the time comes that
q Zulu patriarch is found to be habitu-
ally consuming more than he IL pro-
ducing. his people expose him il .the
bush to the tender mercies OF the
hyenas.
There is certain degree OF social
economy in these methods, but from
the standpoint of the individual they
leave something to be desired.
The rosiness Of the look forward has
much to do with the individuals view
of the present. Gloom ahead darkens
the present. and present gloom hinders
wholesome production. The gloomy
man can render neither himself nor
the world due service ope 10 . part
Of the necessary equipment OF the
fun man; and to him the last end OF
life Is and ought to be the brightest, II
not the most productive. portion OF the
whole. Insofar as society can furnisn
this hope for the individual, It is prac-
ticing- economy as well as applied
christianity. Indeed. christian nations
a re characterized by their well wrousnt
systems of asylums and pensions
One OF the most tardy institutions :, q J
pension its worn-out workers 10 tne
christian church itself. particularly
the Protestant denominations. only
n comparatively recent years has con-
certed effort been made to raise ar
adequate fund for the care OF ageo
ministers and their widows In year.
gone by, q common Conception o.
Christian minister was that OF one VINO
had renonnced the vain pomp ane
/ glory OF the world for the JOY se1 !, - .
fore him in the life to come. ana nas
taken the vow Of poverty for tne koo Z.
J OF his ministry. To the keeea1s =
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1916-02-02
sTEEvER's SYSTEM OF PREPAREDNESS.

In 1911 the war office assigned a
young lieutenant to the inspector gen.
eralship of the Wyoming militia He
lived at Cheyenne and lacking suffi-
Gent work to utilize his military en-
ergy proposed to train high school boys
as a cadet corps. He had the usual
opposition. The labor unions opposed
it on the grounds Of hostility to the
national guard as the tool of the en-
ployers in suppressing strikes; the
ministers fought it and educators
waved it aside. Steever went to the
opposition and argued it out. To the
unions he proposed entire separation OF
the cadets from the militia. He made
enlistment voluntary To the parents
he said:
We will make citizens, not soldiers.
Your boys will be taught the advan~
tages of a strong body and a clean
mind the value of self control and de-
cent restraints. civic duties and re-
sponsibilities. Our goal will be the full
development OF the fraternal instinct
the community of-lnterest spirit-sO
that every youngster will grow up in
the understanding that no group,
whether it be cadet company, city
state. or nation, is stronger than Its
| weakest member.
he met the educators thus:
DO you mean to say that the athletic
sports of your schools develop initia-
tive?" Lieutenant Steeyer demanded.
GO and listen while to the coaches
Of football teams and baseball nines'
You rake the school or college for the
strongest and most skilful, and put
these chosen few in the hands Of spe-
| cialists who demand the blindest sort
Of obedience. This one half Of l per
cent is the athletic expression of the
student body. The 1914 per cent get
exercise by sitting in grand-stand
seats, and develop initiative by parrot
| ing the cries that a yeH-leader teaches
| them. What is this but a tragedy OF
! lopsided development? All thought fol
those who are strong already, and ne
glect for those who can not make q
team My cadet plan reaches every
| boy in the school with a training tina
will streng then him physically, men.
tally, and morally"
| Now the success of Lieutenant Stee.
yer and the results are a long story
| told in Everybody's magazine for Feb.
Iruary and can not be reproduced here
But the steever system worked. J
spread to smaller towns and whel
|Larimie and Cheyenne went up agains
little Casper in the intercity tourna
ment the Casper squad walked OF witt
the honors Of the meet. The educator
fell in with it, SO did the unions
SO did the parents when the fact tina
but one out Of every five high schoo
cadets had less than forty inch ches
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1916-02-02
GirlesReYub6lu1
Published Daily By The
MES-REPUBLlCAN PRINTING CO.
TERMS.
WOODROW KISSED HER.

There was one item on the presi-
dents menu at the Chamberlain last
night that did not appear on the
printed form.
During the course of the meal
no doubt as 1t was nearing the desser,
stage-the president arose. walked
around the table to Mrs. Wilson. and
planted an oscularv token of his re-
gard upon her lips.
Mrs. Gels Botsford and DR.. Georgia
Stewart. who observed this slight de-
parture from the printed schedule
were unable to report how the first
lady reacted under this exhibition of
husbandly esteem.-News Report in
Des Moines Register
In short plain Iowese. Mr. Wilson
got up and kissed her smack on the
mouth. Seems like she ought to have
reacted" whatever that is. so that
the witnesses could have testified to
something definite.
Now. now, cut out that stuff about
George Dewey and Richmond Pearson
Hobson and the like Aw. fergit il.
There was only one man in Iowa who
had a right to get up. wipe his lips on
his napkin and kiss the former Mrs
Gait right on the kisser. And he did
it. Would you want kissable woman
TO pass thru Iowa utterly unkissed?
Perish the thought. Remember that
kisses" 0. you do. Well. get this:
kissing goes with canvass back duck
and French on the bill of fare just the
same as wenies and sauer kraut. II
IS the one universal condment of al!
nations. Even savage tribes TO whom
salt itself is unknown use it. It's just
as like to happen in shanty as in
palace. Maybe more so. And in the
latter example witnesses would prob
ably observe reaction"
It may be that Mrs w was tired
not of hubby bless your sOul-but tired
of cars and crowds and the like. May
hap that accounts for the lack of en-
thusiasm with which she received the
presidential favor. Perhaps she was
wondering how the boys We're getting
along at the jewelry store. And then
too according to human observation
the widower who marries his second
late in life is always more demon
strative and prone to kissing than she
is. Never mind analysis. Nobody who
has been married even once would at
tempt to analyze married folks joys
and troubles. He'd have enough OF
his own. Of course this explanation
naturally suggests itse!f-perhaps she
was uaprepared for woodrow's sud-
den and determined invasion anC
mayhap she's no reactionary.
To take liberties with Leigh Hunt
(wasnt it?):
Woodrow kissed her where she sat,
Jumping from the chair he sat in.
Time, you thief, who love to get
Sweets within your list. get that IN.
Say she's merry. says she's sad,
Say that health and wealth had missed
her.
Say she's growing old but add.
Woodrow kissed her.
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1916-02-02

tusks On being captured, however.
these are sawed or and converted into
billiard balls. celluloid plano keys and
mental machinery for ball players. Tho
demand for this machinery is 30 much
greater than the supply that MANY
players 60 without any.
There are several men In this cotln.
try who could learn Z useful Lesson by
observing the patience, industry and:
good nature Of the elephant. II they
were not so busy trying to run fifteen
balls from the break.
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1916-02-02
CAN'T GET THE JOB.

Council Bluffs Nonpareil.l
Merely as suggestion, why wouldn't
Teddy have more fun running down
Villa and tieing him up with his hands
than he ever had chasing mountain
lions ?-MarshaIltown Times Republic
can.
He would indeed have lot OF fun
In such chase, but how is he ever to
get chance at such job unless he
can get man Of his own type in the
White House? And that is exactly
what Teddy is trying to do.
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1916-02-02
EsTABRooK,s BOOM"

tSlou6 lily TriDune.1
Only moderate Imagination Is re-
CURED to picture the Estabrook pres
fdential candidacy as resulting from
eastern estimates Of western politics.
The absolute fizzle Of this candidacy
Is partial proof that the eastern estf-
mate is very faulty
i Tho formerly citizen OF Nebraska
Mr. Estabrook has been a resident Of
New York state for a number Of year.
Nefehef In Nebraska nor In New York
did ne accomplish anything that marks
him as a presidential prospect. What,
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1916-02-02

thousand children had their there
little girl and lad filled with black despair
Perhaps" the urbane cashier cried. "n
the grim receivers will divide the asssts-I don't
know The heartsick little children wepk their cheelS
with tears soiled YEARLY they homewara
their Christmas time was spoiled. Then Henry Frick
reared and said This will do. the kids
sha.n't weeping to bed-they1i have their money
now!" Aladdin rubbed his wondrous lamp. In smoky old
Ptttsgrad and bade the childrens decsrnp. and
made their Christmas glad! The children, rescued from
rhe hole by him. doubt declare: "a may have
large white SOUL cen tho milAonairel"
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1916-02-02

raise fifteen millions for a similar ussas
the Episcopalians. ten millions, and
other denominations less substantial
sums. ~ q " w
These endowments will not provide
enough luxury for the pensioners to- 1T
tract unworthy men to the pulpit. But
they promise at least = protection from
old-age poverty. And TO this extent
they will brighten the future Of mon
whose business Il u 10 teach the world
-Minneap0lia Jnsssss 3 49,
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1916-02-02
Iona Newspapers
THE REWARDS OF THE RICH.
LCedar RAPIDS Gazette.1

BY settling In Iowa at an early day,
buying land at a low price, ayailing
himself Of his opportunities and liv-
ing a frugal life, l.. S. Coffin managed
to amass sufficient wealth to prove to
heirs and lawyers that he had a feeble
mind. Great are the rewards Of the
upright and model citizen.
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1916-02-02

Occupying the ports of Antivari and
Ducicnon, on the Adriatic coast OF
Montenegro, with Scutari, on the Lake
OF Scutari, the Austro- Hungarian
forces promised to make good their
threat of dominating the head OF the
Adriatic sea. They directed their en-
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1916-02-02
SGUTARI PORT Of DURAzzO md ESSAD PAShA

ergies also toward capturing Avlona
and Durazzo. important cities In that
region. Austrian troops were said to
be moving in the direction OF DurazZa,
where Essad Pasha. formerly provi-
sional ruler Of Albania, prepared re-
sistance. The Austrian occupation OF
Scutari appears to confirm previous
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1916-02-02
MulIah.

"My husband is one of the most stub
born men in the world"
He can't be any more stubborn than
mine"
''Oh. yes. I'm sure he must be. Yes
terday had an engagement to meet
him at o'clock"
"Yes?"
well, it was nearly 1870 when got
there, and he won't admit yet that the
rest he got while he was waiting did
him sood.'-Chicago Herald
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1916-02-02

an elephant IL taken. hold Of In child
hood It can he taugtt th4E Iataet dance
steps in few weeks which ought 70
bring the blush Of shame 10 the chsess
OF m!ddle-aGed husbands who refuse
to learn. E s
In his wild state the elephant comes
equipped with q pair OF sharp. pryin6
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1916-02-02

statements that no peace negotiations
are now proceeding between Austria
and Montenegro. as. according to the
reports concerning the original Aus
trian offers of peace. 1t was understood
that the Montenegrins were to hold
Scutari as compensation for Austria's
occipation OF Mount Loven
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1916-02-02
A Masonic Meetings.
w SpEcIAI COMMUNICATE

Marshall Lodge No. los A. F. and A. NJ.
Work in third degree Friday. Feb. 4.
1870 p. m. John w. Wells, secretary
B 0. Frazey, w. NJ
sIGNET CHAPTER. No. 3s. r. A. M.
Special convocation Monday evening
Feb 7. for work in Past and Most EN-
cellent Degrees. Carl Shaffner. H. r;
John w. Wells, secretary.
STATED ASSEMBLY, King solomon
Council No. 20, r. & S. NJ. Monday
Feb. 81. regular business. l. T. Forbes
recorder: George Gregory. 1. M.
STATED coNcLAvE, st. Aldemar
Commandery No. 80. K. T., Tuesday.
Feb. %, 1880 o'clock. Regular busl-
ness. l. T. Forbes, Rec; H. {. Mueiler'
e. C.
REGULAR MEETING Central Chap
ter No. 81, o. E. s., Wednesday, Feo'
16, 80 p. m. Business. Eliza ;. Bat
tin, secretary; Cora M. Mcdowell
w. NJ.
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1916-02-02
Take Your Choice.

The Standard dictionary defines
sable" n black, especially as the
color OF mourning, while 1t may also
mean Of the color Of sable-fur, dark
brown. Webster tells US that the ad-
iectiye sable means Of the color Of the
sabls's fur: dark; black, and IL an ar
stiele - sabled it is darkened or made
black.
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1916-02-02
IOWA OPINION AND NOTES.

The Humboldt Republican thinks:
1T is we'll to remember that the pro-
gressives had 1,000,0 more votes than
the republicans, at the last election,
and the old line republicans that are
talking Of the return Of the prodigal
should remember that the majority Is
returning to the minority II the boys
are reunited under the old banner.
And it might also be we'll to remem-
Der that the causes that drove the
voters from the good old party In 1912
will also drive them away in 1916"
..r.... mr. sr.-t. 1,
Noting that the mail carriers over at
Jefferson, in Greene county. struck,
claiming that they can not handle
fifty mile mail routes in below zero
weather" the Council Bluffs Nonpareil
suggests that; Such items Of infor-
nation as this make it clear that If
Wilson is to get Iowa's electoral votes
next November, he must do lot OF
preparing outside the domain Of
militarism." s-r 90. 90
Why all this alarm" demands the
Monticello Express. referring to the
case Of Senator Fred Larrabee. What
is the matter with his quitting, like
many another fellow before him?
There has been a Larrabee in office
ever since the war, and vacation
might not be unpleasant"
IF Charles A. Rawson wants to be
governor he should get out before the
people in the primary and take his
chances" declares the Knoxville Jour
nal. There is strong feeling against
going outside the primary list OF can
didates in making a convention nomi-
nation. AMI Mr.. Rawson is too good a
man TO be embarrassed by such a
handicap"
There is only one man that has
changed front more times in the past
four years than President Wilson, and
that man is Louis d. Brandeis, the
new judge of the supreme court says
the Mason City Giobe-Gazette.
"Altho Wilson was elected by re-
publican votes" declares the Webster
City Freeman Tribune, "he is the most
partisan president that has been in the
White House since Grant and the re-
publicans are not going to help keep
him there" s=au
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1916-02-02

Squash pie tastes as gratifying az
pumpkin pie, but one can't fnaho In.
self believe it. Traditions are power
ful, even In pie.
The Washington times., 1916-11-06

Inquiries, either IN this column or by
mail, provided letters are signed tcith
the full name and address OF the per-
sons tpritiHg. Tho correspo ndents' nanles
tpil not appear IN the articles.
The Washington times., 1916-11-06

you should try the new preparation.
Plant Juice. and you are then on the
right road to good health. The action
of this remedy is just as direct, just
as positive. and just as certain in its
influence on the human system as that
the morning follows the night.
That this Is proven conclusively II
is only necessary to listen to the
statements of well-known local people
who daily call at the headquarters or
The Plant Juice Man, at The Peoples
Drug Store. corner of 9TH and
Selected from n mass of written teS-
timonials is that of Mrs William Graz
ven, who lives at Landover. Md. and
whose husband is well-known and
she tells how her husband was re-
lieved of bad case of stomach
trouble by Plant Juice. as follows:
my husband was sufferer for IL
years with his stomach; everything
he ate fermented and formed a gas
and he dreaded to sit down to a meal
and could not even retain a piece OF
toast on his stomach; he could not
sleep at night. as the gas pressed
against his heart and gave him such
pain, and he had to sit propped up In
bed all night. He was very nervous
and his liver and kidneys were badly
affected; he had terrible pains in his
back and side. We had read of the
made In other cities, and he conclud-
d, as last resort. he would try q
bottle. although he was very much
discouraged of ever obtaining relief,
as he had spent hundreds of dollars
for medicines; but the only thing that
relieved him was Plant Juice. He
has taken two bottles, and the result
has been marvellous. He can eat any
thing he wants, is not nervous, and
can sleep fine at night. Plant Juice
has made a new man of him, and he
is glad to recommend II to others"
The Plant Juice Man is at Tho
Peoples Drug Store, corner of 7th and
Il Streets. where he is daily meeting
the local public, and introducing and
explaining the merits OF this remedy.
--AdVt.
The Washington times., 1916-11-06

at the Kendall Green School for Girls.
the matron. Miss II. NJ. VanDevanter'
tells how she cares for a cottage where
there are twenty-six deaf children, from
nine to sixteen years.
"They all love her." Miss VanDe-
yanter writes. "For honesty and econ
omy, am sure no one In the same posi-.
ton could surpass her and have as good
meals as she gives u.s.
\ Letters From Employers.
In addition to the entries received
by Mrs. Briggs. Mrs. Court f. Wood,
president of the federation. today
received letters from the following:
Mrs. Henry s. Wise. 2o1S Q street.
entering Jane Brooks Harris. with
her thirty-five years.
Mrs. Charles Il. Caldwell, formerly
of Chatham Courts. and now in Flor
ida, who wishes to enter Matte Kate
Smith, with her thirty-one years,
and during her absence with her
dsught,eT. Mrs. Mrs. g. H. FowieS at
Mrs. John Hieston. S517 w place.
who wished to make sure that Cor
nella Thomas. about whom she had
written previously was properly en-
tered. The term of service Is forty
Mrs. w. Wallace Nelson, haywood.
Va. entering Matte James. In her
employ fifty-one years.
Gertrude NJ. Johnston. 1894 Web
ster street. entering Mary Ringgold,
with her thirty years.
The Washington times., 1916-11-06
HOW GOOD that
MUSTEROLE FEELS!
1t Gets to That Sore Spot
Like Magic

A-a-hi That's a delicious relief
for those sore muscles, those stiff
joints, that lame back.
Musterole is a clean, white oint-
ment, made with the oil of mustard
and other home simples.
Il does the work of the old
fashioned mustard plaster, minus the
plaster and minus the blister!
You simply rub Musterole on the
spot where the pain is-rub il on
briskly-and usually the pain is gone.
No muss, no bother. Just comfort
ing soothing relief-frst a gentle
glow. then a delightful sense of
GOODNESS. And best of all, no blisters
like the old-fashioned mustard plas-
ter used to make.
Use Musterole for sore throat,
bronchitis, tonsilitis, Group, stiff
neck, asthma, neuralgia, headache, con-
gestion, pleurisy, rheumatism, lumbago,
pains and aches of the back or joints,
sprains, sore muscles, bruises, chill
blains, frosted feet and colds of the
chest Git often prevents pneumonia).
2sc and Soc Jars; hospital size $3.50