davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Evening star., 1916-06-04
Everything that anybody
ever did somebody else had
a chance to do.
GRANDPA Didn't Believe in Bell

NRANDPA didn't believe in Bell.
VI You couldn't tell I'M that man could talk
From Painted Post clear to South Norwalk.
SO he put HIS CASH in a new Oil well
Cause oil was REAL and was sure to sell.
Well. they're digging it yet, and they IL dig to -
I'm thinking, before we get smell
OF the oil or the splendid dividends
That Grandpa boasted about to his friends
Father. he didn't believe in Hill.
You couldn't get H IN to buy no stock
In road through swamp of ice and rock.
50 he put HIS CASH in "McCumbers Pill,
Cause everybody is sometimes i'll.
And the Doctor he ran awhile until
The Government drew that license bill
About selling dope. And raid, it ends
The dream HI had about dividends.
Me, didn't believe in Wright
He couldn't fool Me with his crazy talk
Of a aeroplane-rnan made to WALK.
SO put MY cash in patent light,
Cause everybody must see at night,
And we sure did have success in sight
(Which it would of come. # we'd had right
To the patent which the lamp depends)
But lawsuit took our dividends.
Folks they NEVER believe it's so,
You can't tell THEM that man do
What the past and the facts amt proved is true
But the county fair has its flying show,
And the submarine, it sails below.
And the Jim Hill trains they come and go
In spite of the mountains and drifts of snow.
And the funniest part of it all, my friends.
IS the fact that they DO pay dividends.
Evening star., 1916-06-04
Give the Last Minute a Fightir
By HERBERT KAUFMAN

the sds enp pantedbl nothing it's 1ate- knockout
isju a sat the quareof.
deals -Four have the value
o
toh is nosedwh
f
all
matter %i O batt ghsuf flor As5ntn
the too to doy r1euebe behop a ahh
Hade without When doubt dre
f1aveocks Stacked have been
al
seem 7anbh Edonhdb dbend
sands Of futile which preceded his practical hannen
het turn he nhnuedh hum t. tmysy y.and
entuaHyf yfoundni II
hist
An dggednes thanG could not
incident his discovery o
1nS
You defeated have COMPLETED back
business lake,
int
;af theresa favor
Success be behind the htyn;h second
Use all Theresa tof
of
fnger1bs aubbor rwoud
b you nvarabl funke thecr
We or ruab3n to abby t in vital
A austes you-hats what makes don't
rebonH'uhn You'd DUP
thai ouneed
You We
anythng slev s
bdc
he
paid only the milk tha still in them al delivery
~
Evening star., 1916-06-04

Could, who was a graduate of Harvard
and remarkable man
could had been taught astronomy by
nari r. Gauss at Gottingen and by
FRANCIS Argo at Paris. He was ac-
qualnted with many of the famous men
IN Europe, among whom was the great
Alexander Humboldt on his return
70 this country he began the publica
tloh or the Astronomical Journal at
Cambridge
Later he was attached to the coast
survey ana was the first man. in the
United states al least. to use the tele-
graph in determining the differences in
longitude. Strangely enough, after I
established "A daily service of weather
forecasts in Cincinnati he did the
same nArgentine Republic where he
hau gone to build and direct national
observatory.
Il helped Gould in his work with tho
coast survey and then, as a guest. spent
two years at the Russian observatory
in Poulkova. By this time 1 was known
rather faVorably, / think, as an as
tronomer AT any rate. 1 was made di-
rector of the Cincinnati Observatory
in 1868, and held the office for five
years.
The Cincinnati Observatory, estab-
Hshed through the personal efforts of
Ormsby Macknight Mitchell, was the
largest in the United States Mitchell.
seldom heard of in these days was A.
famous. an eloquent and useful man
fifty years ago. Born in Kentucky, he
attended school at Lebanon, Ohio. and
at the age of thirteen was a clerk in
a country store.
"At fifteen he entered the Military
Academy at West Point, graduating in
the class with Robert E. Lee and Joseph
T. Johnston. After being commissioned
a second lieutenant in the artillery in
recognition of his high standing as a
student, he was assigned to the position
OF assistant professor of mathematics
at the academy. He resigned from the
army, however. after duty at several
army posts, studied law in Cincinnati
and was admitted to the bar.
While reading law he acted as chief
engineer OF the Little Miami railroad
He suggested the building of an OBJ
servatory after he had become profes-
Cincinnati College. The money for the
observatory was mostly collected by
himself. He appealed to the people for
small contributions and in all raised
about $4,000.
The telescope was bought in Europe
by Mitchell, who went there for the
purpose. and the corner stone of the
pier on which It was to be placed was
A"iA W ooHi SuiHSy <tudInss Win an
oration, in November. 1S43. Mitchell lee
tured on astronomy in the east and
middle west from 1912 until 1848. My
mother heard him in Brooklyn. She
said he was the most eloquent man she
had ever listened to. and that he made
astronomy, ordinarily a dry subject, as
interesting as one of Dickens short
stories
Il suppose that her report of the lee
ture turned my own mind toward as
tronomy and really fixed the lines of
my career. Mitchell was also chief en-
gineer OF the Ohio and Mississippi rail-
Evening star., 1916-06-04

MY mind took hold of such things as
I have mentioned and l began to think a
great deal about the mysteries Of nature
When was nine years old. my, mother,
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1916-04-07
Judgments Rendered.

Martha M. Fuller was awarded a
Judgment Monday by Judge Bryan in
the suit against the Orchard Heights
Suburban Heights Land company. The
action was brought to recover on a
$50OO.00 promissory note executed by
the company of which H. F. Dixie and
E. M. Clark were officers. J. A. Els
ton appeared for the plaintiff.
Rebecca L. Herbst has been given
judgment amounting to approx
mately 5000 against Charles Leroy
Colcord in the District court. This
was foreclosure suit and the defend
ant allowed the case to go to judg-
ment by default. G. w. Lamson was
attorney for plaintiff.
Loren D. Perisho has been given a
decree Of divorce-from his wife, Bessie
L, Perisho, on the grounds of deser'
ton. The wife did not contest the
suit but allowed it to go by default
Mr.. Perisho is resident of New Ply
mouth. Rice, Thompson & Buckne
were attorneys for Mr.. Perisho.
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1916-04-07
Kansas Republicans United.

Arthur Capper. Governor OF IAN
sss-"The Republican party in kan-
sas was never more firmly united than
now; there never was time when the
principles of Republicanism appealed
with greater weight to our people and
never time when we approached
campaign with more vonfdence.
"It is apparent that both the tariff
program and the military policy OF
the Democratic administration at
Washington have failed and our peo-
pie will work for and welcome return
of Republican stability and confidence,
But for the enormous amounts that
are now pouring into this country IN
payment for war munitions going to
the warning European powers, the ut
ter collapse of the Wilson free trade
policy would impress the nation still
more forcibly.
"The Republicans. of Kansas have
entire confidence in the ability OF tht
1916 national convention to nominate
candidate for President who will II
every way measure up to the higf
standards of Republicanism, and the,
will give that candidate a rousing ma
jority. More than that, they will
send solid Republican congressiona
delegation to Washington to uphold
his hands and elect their entire stat
ticket at home"
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1916-04-07
Demands Fare Reduction.

The CITY council at its meeting last
Monday passed a motion which. If ct,
fective in accomplishing its aim, VIII
establish a scent fare on the Idaho
Traction company line within the city
limits. At present, it is claimed, per-
sons riding from College hill to Can-
Won station are charged 10 cents, while
those who proceed few hundred
Yards further to Rice station are re-
ouired to pay Is cents. Both Rice sta
ton and the College stations are with
in the city limits.
It developed in the council meetihg
that the ordinance under which the
interurban company secured. its fran
chise through this city stipulated, that
no more than a Scent fare should be
charged within its limits. The motion
made by Councilman Hayman was &c
the effect that unless the company
change its fares to conform with ths
ordinance. the franchise statute is &c
be repealed and a charge leviee
against the company for use OF th'
Another motion put through was e
the effect that, inasmuch as the ope'
irrigation ditch running down K,m
half avenue from the top OF the NIL,
distance of about 1900 feet. has GU
into the thoroughfare, the company
to be required to abate the nn,sahy'
by installing pipe system AT '"'
point
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1916-04-07
I Am a Life Insurance Policy.

Born of a crying and suffering hui
I am the voice of the dead de-
narted souls, the incarnate spirit OF
protection, the monarch of necessities;
Nv voice soothes the afflicted, and
drives away oppression. NV influence
is mighty and burns with the hre-
blood of human action. | am led from
the purse of all humanity, from the
richest to the most lowly. | sip. from
the cup of every living fountain.
take toll where'er l go, and return
tenfold at eventide.
l sleep not, neither do rest. /
know not night nor day. ! know no'
life nor death, though on them both
| depend, and spread my mantle at
niphtfall. Those who created me
cease to be, yet their names | hand
from age to age, and ! break not my
covenant with them.
| am majestic in my strength, SUD
lime in my power, autocratic IN m,
acccptances. vet | humble myself al
the call of those who take me unto
them and bow at their slightest wish
am the consort of kings, the partnc'
| of copital, the brother of toll, the in
spiration of the helpless, the RICH
| arm of the needy, the champion OF tn
oppressed.
My responsibility is infinite. an
the dynamic force of human en-
deavor, crystallized into perpetuation
To me is entrusted the care of thous
ands upon thousands of widows an
little children, left to fight the vicis
STUDIES of iife's battle alone.
am set in motion by desire and
am given life by death. | stand eve
ready and waiting. | am greater tina
any individual, and more powert,
than any group of individuals. ye
innocent little children fear me no
, fold into small envelope. we
, when called forth l am of great mas
) nitude. l am the clarion voice of tt
| indispensable. am life insuranc
policy.-By Leon ]. Barrett.
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1916-04-07
MAGPIES SHOULD BE ,,y,,
GIVEN SHORT SHIFT

Last year a. pair OF meadow nsNs
buiided their nest near the hired
Mans house. They fought on the
magpies for few weeks, but The day
came. when the magpies doubled forces
on them and robbed the nest OF more
than half grown baby larks. ms ais as
annoSntmcnt was severe on the tive
larks. the mother feeling the grind
the hardest. The magpies wagea a
relentless war on every ,ne
vicinity. The iarks fought pretty
we'll however and often came oil We
torious but the final triumph OF the
larger bird was inevitable. Inc de-
struction wrought, by the magpie on
its small neighbors is simply terrihe
in Boise valley. The quail Is neipissss
before its vandalism and bandit haDits
The pheasant falls an easy prey, ano
il the nest of eggs gets by the gay
COMBS when the little fellows mus
begin to run about, and as shy as the,
are, the magpie evades the parre,n
birds and slaughters the babies. I'M
Hired Man would like to see ever
maggie killed in the early spring an'
his tribe cut off. A maybe hunt aion'
the river some nice Saturday woui'
give splendid opportunity Tor DOM
the birds of this REGION a wonderful
good. wouldn't have this hunt OF
Sunday; 1t looks bad,
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1916-04-07
UNUSUALLY FINE READER
AT THE HUREE TONIGHT
Special Engagement of Miss Olive
Gwinn for One Night.

The following, taken from the East
Oregonian. of Pendlcton. Ore, ex-
plains the treat at the Huree tonight:
when reading of the war in Eu-
rope, the stories of brave deeds by |
men on the field Of battle take first
place. Iron crosses for German
heroes, Victoria crosses for the Eng
fish heroes and Crosses of the Legion
of Honor for the heroes Of France,
are distributed with lavish hand to
the men who offer themselves as food
for the cannon. At home. however,
is another class of brave, patient
fighters for the mother countries but
these are not mentioned in the orders
of the day for valiant service. Their
suffering is the more heroic for the
silent agony and days of anxiety and
the nights of unrest, wondering what
has become of husband, brother, son
or sweetheart who marched away
with the regiment. These are the
women of the lands now torn by war.
Marion Craig Wentworth wrote
| War Brides and it is doubtful If
this classic of war has found a better
Interpreter than Miss Olive Gwinn,
who last evening gave reading OF
this piece before a large audience at
the Alta theatre. There are seven
characters in the story-four women
and three men. One of the women
is a war-bride. one has received a
proposal to become a war-bride. one
has a husband at the front, and the
other woman is the aged mother who
has given sons to the tatherland
The setting is in humble home, th'
time the present, and the place--an,
war stricken country. The diatriD'
against war is the argument OF thu
woman against her sons going t.
battle, The wedding ring Of the war
bride is a ring of iron. Her place II
the empire is to become, the mothe
of men. She is influenced by tn
promise of widows pension. Sh
does not wed for love but she wed
that the race may be replenished ate
war has taken its toll. Against thl
scheme of things-the edict OF the ia
therland-the woman rebels. This, |
E brief, is what War Brides seeks t
! argue-that when the women refuse t
= bear sons for war, war will cease.
is story full of dramatic power an
beauty. - :.
Miss Gwinn's first appearance BIZ
:. fore Pendleton audience was well rtt
:. ceived. After several years, OF stud
$ she displays marked ability as
/ reader, one gifted with the genius {
:, making alive the characters of he
d story. For an hour, an audience of
o least three hundred people listened
It this story of War Brides. 1t was
1t appreciative audience. as we'll as cri
1t ical one. The. deep attention, FOLLOW
e. ed by the generous applause at Il
+ close of her reading was the stamp
n approval given this young Pendrete
lie girl"
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1916-04-07
As to National Self-conceit.
(Sprinp6eld Union)

Rev Cortland Myers, PASTOR OF Ire
mont Temple, Boston, denounces the
preparedness movement as due to ma
tional self-conceit, and self-conccit, he
saws. is repulsive to God and man. But
what of the national sclf-conceit which
for generations has stood and is SUI
standin~ in the way of preparedness
the self-conceit which has led millions
of Americans to believe that the couf-
try needed no regular army or navy
to defend it from invasion! What OF
the popular conceit that the United
States il attacked could almost instant
Nv raise miraculously trained ana
equipped armies of millions OF men
and in some mysterious wav provide a
strong navy to protect these shores
from the ravages Of hrst-class foreign
nayies and the landing of huge bodies
of finely trained and equipped foreign
troops? Is there sem cthing admirable
in this form of national conceit? VIZ
have boosted and Dragged and struttcc
around in our Yankee self-conceit, dc
fving the world and continually invit
in trouble, confident that when. th'
trouble came we should be able to han
die it without the, slightest difficulty
The European war has opened TN
eyes of many of us to the folly an'
the danger OF this self-conceit. 1t ha
caused us to marvel that we have sue
ceeded so long in escaping. the conse
uuences of our folly and conceit. An
now that we realize the emptiness o
our boasting and the hollow sham @
our pride in our might we are turnin
in shame and humiliation to the tas
we should have undertaken long year
$ ago, prayerfully hoping that it ma
be completed before the great evil on
national self-conceit has caused us S
richly to deserve comes upon us
5 overwhelf the country and add sti
further to our shame and humiliation
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1916-04-07
HIRED MAN DON'T THINK
" ROWS SHOULD TAKE PEEP

The Hired Man was OUT On Wy
streets during the little wind Hurry
one afternoon this week and noticed
some Young fellows standing conven-
;entlv close to a corner, watching wo--
men as they approached. The wind
was causing a good deal of difficulty
in navigation with skirts, and the
voung men were having a good deal
to say to each other, That may be
alright from some standpoints, and 1t
NAV work for while. but the Hired
Man has always thought that a good
remedy for such disease is a compound
fracture of the neck bone just where
The oil cup on the cerebellum lubricates
the centrifugal impression apparatus;
as it cooperates with the cereornuga'
device and controls its cable of nerves
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1916-04-07

George F. Crum of Lewiston was
in Caldwell Tuesday and Wednesday.
While in the city he was the guest OF
Mayor and Mrs. F. E. Boyes. Mr..
Crum is a candidate for the Repub-
lican nomination for governor. The
present trip is for the purpose of TAX
ing a preliminary survey OF the held.
He will not return to his home at
Lewiston until after the Twin Falls
convention.
Mr.. Crum states that he has been
received most royalty i'll southern Ida
no. He has met great many people,
great many of whom have volun-
tarily pledged him their support. The
north, he states, is with him solidly
Mr.. Crum has no doubts of his noml-
nation and election.
No Platform at This Time.
Mr.. Crum stated that he had no plat
form announcement to make at TINS
time. For the other Republican can
didates in the field he had none but the
kindest words He expressed the hope
that Lieutenant Governor Taylo'
would not become candidate. HI
stated that he feared the psychologist
effect of Mr.. Taylor's candidacy mucl
more than the loss of votes it woul'
cause in north Idaho.
"Ninety-nine per cent of the worl
of the governors Office, said MI
Crum, rs of purely business nature
The affairs of Idaho, in their bushes
aspect, make the Office big. respon
sible business position. If elected gov
ernor | will devote the same time an
attention to the Office as would t
a private business affair. | believe thu
the duties of the Office demand thu
l the governor be on the job and tina
he can occupy himself all Of the tim
81 am unable to distinguish any di
ference in principl. in the transactl,oc
of private and public business; IN
same thoroughness, comprehensio
, and attention to business essential
success in private undertakings al
equally important in public affair
What will spell success or failure
the one will spell the same thing
the. other"
Mr.. Crum went to Nampa. Wedne
day afternoon, thence to Boise whe
he will spend 4 day or two. Fro
| Boise Mr.. Crum will go to the sout
east
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1916-04-07

There met together here in amIcable
session last Friday evening, represent
atiyes of the Mud Lake and Black
CANYON districts, now supposed to be
arrayed against each other to hight to
a finish the battle for surplus waters
from the Arrowrock system. Even
now the two rival groups are bending
every energy at Washington to int1u-
ence legislation in favor of their con-
tention.
Finding Common Ground.
Friday nights session was TREND
Nv one for the reason that possible
common grounds on which the north
side and south side can unite has been
discovered. This common ground is
the practically undisputed fact that the
Boise river each year carries enough
water to irrigate the entire valley. Can
the two factions but evolve some way
of conserving the river flow in excess
of what is stored at Arrowrock and
Deer Flat everything would be happy
and wire pulling would cease.
To investigate the matter and Sc
cure all available information a rep
resentative committee was named al
the conference. On this committee
Director Andrews represents the
Black Canyon District; n. w. IA
Slyke of Bowmont represents the MUG
Lake section, and J. w. Bradnt 0
Nampa acts for the Water. Users. as
ISOLATION. The other members OF tn
committee are o. F. Merrill Of Parm;
and B. M. Holt of Caldwell:
Want Government Aid:
At the meeting talks favoring co
operation in move to have the. rec
lamation service officials investigat
the possibilities of impounding suffl
Gent water to reclaim all lands no,
within bounds of the Boise proJeec
! and also in the Black Canyon distric
were heard. Secretary Lemon. OF tn
Settlers Reclamation association e
, Middleton, Ned Jenness and J. a. r
/ Dher of the Mud Lake committee, an
e B. M Holt and Walter Griffitths
a Caldwell made talks favoring the me-
e move. Mr.. Holt repeated much OF tn
h information he had formerly mad
: public with reference to the grea
d amount of water still carried away D
v the Boise river unutilized. - .
: Just when the new committee WI
r get together to begin the collection
d data cannot yet be announced.
The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1916-04-07
"RAIL ROAD" FISK CAME
NEAR ENLISTING WITH VILLA

Our fellow townsman. Rail Road
Fisk Cts r. R. Fisk, and | presume
it means Rail Road Fisk, and if you
have noticed him rushing around like
I have, YOU wouldn't think he is
narrow guage railroad either) one time
came within an ace of enlisting with
the bandit Villa Mr.. Fisk was visit.
ing with a brother in Mexico and
Villas bandsmaster heard our fellow
townsman playing horn, and follow
ed him up. The Mexican band leader
was a fat little pretty fellow. jolly and
intense, and he had no idea what un-
der the sun could be wrong with Mr..
Fisk's head, when he would turn
down an opportunity to be next to
the band leader in the chieftian's roy.
al band. He could have just reveled
in chilli and red peppers. They say
thew have peppers so hot down there
thai YOU can throw one of them into
the dry grass in August and set hre
70 II OF course the Hired Man de-
MES such stuff, but then they do have
hot peppers down there. wen. th'
bandmaster followed Mr.. Fisk INSIST
emily and offered all kinds OF induce
ments. The Mexican had just beer
over to New York City and purchase
ali new instruments of the most cost,
make. He felt that his band woul'
not be complete without this smiiihs
/ American with his footing abiiitie
and ferocious marching propensities
but our fellow townsman gave mn
the cold shoulder and fell to 1t no,
| don't know just how long since al
this occurred, but Fisk has done righ
/ in remainin~ hrst-class AmeriGa
and giving us those three sweet gir'
of his, either one OF whom is wott
all of Mexico with the commandment
| ~: e .La ,r,,v thrown in.