davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Ashland tidings. [volume] (Ashland, Or.) 1876-1919, 1916-08-28
Too Sensitive

It was the first night after the show
The leading woman's mother was
downcast.
whats the trouble, dearT asked
the leading woman in surprise Il
made brilliant hit tonight"
The old lady was surprised.
"Did you, Sophief l heard the audi
ence shouting Play right! Play rightF
and thought you had failed"
And the leading woman laughed In
amusement
"Why. my dear, they were shouting
Playwright! Playwright" Chicago
Tribune. .---.
Ashland tidings. [volume] (Ashland, Or.) 1876-1919, 1916-08-28
Dublin Castle.

Dublin castle has history Of over
seven centuries, for 1t was King John
who in 1904 ordered 1t to be built well
fortified, with good fosses and thick
walls strong enough to defend or con.
troll the city" Henry I'LL, when about
to visit Ireland in 1243, ordered the ad.
dition Of hail. with sufficient win
dows and glass easements" and other
improvements were made in succeed.
ing reigns. particularly by the Duke Of
Clarence, son Of Edward ILL.,. who as
viceroy spent much money on tne cas-.
tie to make 1t convenient las his father
complained when called upon to pay)
"for his sports and other pleasures."-
London Standard.
Ashland tidings. [volume] (Ashland, Or.) 1876-1919, 1916-08-28
AFRICAN ELEPHANTS.
They May Be In Captivity, but Tho,
Are Never In Subsection.

Are Never In Subsection.
For many reasons the chase Of the
elephant stands at the apex OF sport
As a man killer in open combat he
ranks with the lion and the African
buffalo. He is the only beast that fears
no other. While he will almost invari-
ably run from the scent Of man he Is
as invariably ready to attack on the
slightest provocation. Fear does not
exist for him. His overwhelming bulk,
power, speed and intelligence make
him supreme beyond the range Of r.
valry.
AS though this were not enough to
establish his pre-eminence, he alone
carries trophy which Is one Of the
staple products Of the industrial world.
The value of ivory rises. 1t never fuc-
tuates. Nor is this all In the mind
Of the east the elephant is intimately
associated with dignity, pomp, pageant
~ and kingship. But in the mind Of
the native African he is king-a king
in his own right
In this regard let it be affirmed that
no elephant born in Africa has ever do
cilely paced hippodromed stage, trun'
died a circus wagon or taken children
for a ride In the park. Those sleep
walking cattle known to the American
public as elephants come from India
and are mere distant cousins to the
king. You may have seen the African
elephant In captivity, but never In sub
lection. Chain him to the floor behind
iron bars, and after ten years he is
st1ll quick to throw muck in the face
OF the man that jeers at him.-George
AUnew Chamherlin in Century,
Ashland tidings. [volume] (Ashland, Or.) 1876-1919, 1916-08-28
HUGHES AND FAIRBANKS.
EDITORIAL PARAGRAPHS.

Two futile invasions Of Mexico and
six separate and distinct policies on
the question Of permitting arms and
ammunition to be sent into that coun-
try are included in the performance
of the Wilson administration In Its
dealings with our southern neighbors
in less than three years. 1t is this
characteristic instability Of the gov
ernment that makes people want a
change.
Ashland tidings. [volume] (Ashland, Or.) 1876-1919, 1916-08-28
Reallatlo PLAY.

Cant you children play without con.
tinually ringing the doorbellT asked
mother, who had been trying in vain to
get an afternoon nap.
mo, mother" said Alice, ATS quite
impossible. You see, Edith and | are
playing house, and Freddie is the col
lector."-St Louis Post Dispatch.
Ashland tidings. [volume] (Ashland, Or.) 1876-1919, 1916-08-28
OH WslIs In the Ocean.

One Of the most novel and interest
ing sights along the California coast,
especially to tourists, are the oil wells
in the ocean at Summer6eld, southern
Santa Barbara county. Long wharfs
carry the scores Of derricks which
mark the location Of these unique
wells. The field is small, covering
about 125 acres.-Argonaut.
Ashland tidings. [volume] (Ashland, Or.) 1876-1919, 1916-08-28

Just as 1t is now obstinately shut
ting its eyes to the need of industrial
preparedness, for three years the Will
son administration refused to see the
need Of adequate military prepared
ness. With war on our southern bOr-
der 1t was content to rely on regular
army that could only muster 10000
available men and refused to continue
the established policy of building up
our navy. When the time came for ac-
tiOn the country had not sufficient
troops to police the border, and this
force has been supplemented by tri6e
more than one-third the war strength
Of the national guard. II the national
administration had had the ability to
interpret the signs of the time military
preparedness would have been well un-
der way instead of barely begun.
Ashland tidings. [volume] (Ashland, Or.) 1876-1919, 1916-08-28

Even Woodrow Wilson could not
save the infamous Clarke amendment
to the Philippines bill He lost the
ablest member of his cabinet, Secre-
tary Garrison, because Of his advocacy
Of the policy Of scuttle, but even the
sacrifice Of Garrison could not save 1t.
Ashland tidings. [volume] (Ashland, Or.) 1876-1919, 1916-08-28

Democrats who harbored hopes that
Josephus would catch the virus from
the Bryan and Garrison designations
are still nursing their disappointment
Nothing remains for them but to re-
sign to a realization that Josephus will
not resign.
Ashland tidings. [volume] (Ashland, Or.) 1876-1919, 1916-08-28
WILSON'S POLICIES BLOWN uP.

Charles Evans Hughes did have ex-
plosives with him when his motorcar
was searched by a Canadian soldier
but they were under the candidates
hat Mr.. Hughes will set them of on
his western tour, and some Of Mr.. VIII
sons policies will be blown up-New
York Sun.
Ashland tidings. [volume] (Ashland, Or.) 1876-1919, 1916-08-28
LONG lime RstMssn Showers.

In 1912 rain fell In the nitrate terri
tory Of Chile for the first time in near
ly half century. and FOR the first
time In mans memory the coast towns
were free from dust.
Ashland tidings. [volume] (Ashland, Or.) 1876-1919, 1916-08-28

The Wilson administration went into
Mexico to punish Villa for his out
rage on American soil. The only pun
ishment inflicted has been on American
soldiers, who were shot down at Car
rial by order of First Chief CarranZa.
Ashland tidings. [volume] (Ashland, Or.) 1876-1919, 1916-08-28

franklin Roosevelt, assistant secre-
tary Of the navy, sees strong trend
for Wilson in Maine. News Dispatch.
Who can blame man who for three
years has been assistant to Josephus
Daniels for seeing things?"
Ashland tidings. [volume] (Ashland, Or.) 1876-1919, 1916-08-28
No Game.

Pat and were watching game Of
chess. Suddenly ! turned to him.
"Have you the timer" l asked, glanc'
ing at his watch pocket
Sure" replied Pat, II have the time,
but not the inclination" IT,
nor
Ashland tidings. [volume] (Ashland, Or.) 1876-1919, 1916-08-28

For every reason that can be ad-
vanced why Progressives should vote
for Wilson ten can be advanced why
they should vote for Hughes, and the
beauty Of 1t is that they know the rea-
sons without having to be told.
Ashland tidings. [volume] (Ashland, Or.) 1876-1919, 1916-08-28

Winis-What is 1t called when two
people are thinking Of the same thing
at the same time-mental telepathy?
Gillis-Sometimes; other times just
plain embarrassment
Ashland tidings. [volume] (Ashland, Or.) 1876-1919, 1916-08-28

President Wilson's campaign man.
ayers are entitled to all the comfort
they can get out of calling the roll Of
Progressives who are going to vote for
him. 1t would be an endless task to
call the roll of Progressives who are
not going to vote for him,
Ashland tidings. [volume] (Ashland, Or.) 1876-1919, 1916-08-28
Fine.

Telephone girls are not allowed to
talk back" tA
what a field from which to select
wife."-Louisville Courier-Journal
Ashland tidings. [volume] (Ashland, Or.) 1876-1919, 1916-08-28

When Charles e. Hughes said: "The
dealings Of the administration with
Mexico constitute a confused chapter
of blunders,' he gave an explicit char
acterization of the Wilson administra-
tons policy in one sentence.
Ashland tidings. [volume] (Ashland, Or.) 1876-1919, 1916-08-28

The stopping Of Governor Hughes
auto by Canadian soldier will not
matter, inasmuch as the band wagons
progress is not to be interrupted.
Ashland tidings. [volume] (Ashland, Or.) 1876-1919, 1916-08-28
Enough Said.

Thrifty, is she?"
THRIFTY / won't go into long dis.
course. / merely tell you that she
banks money in December"
Ashland tidings. [volume] (Ashland, Or.) 1876-1919, 1916-08-28

If the Democratic national admins
tration had left on the statute books in
1894 the federal corrupt practices act
placed there by the Republicans there
would be no occasion for the present
administrations campaign publicity
measure, which at best is very poor
substitute for the law repealed.
Ashland tidings. [volume] (Ashland, Or.) 1876-1919, 1916-08-28

Landlady Csympathetically) : why,
how did you fall downstairs, Mr
Lanks? Boarder with dignity Unex-
pectedly, ma'am.-Pall Mall Gazette.
Ashland tidings. [volume] (Ashland, Or.) 1876-1919, 1916-08-28

Charles E. Hughes, the Republican
candidate, recognizes an important
fact that Woodrow Wilson, the Demo-
cratic president, appears to have over
looked-that the United States is big
enough to help Mexico out of the con-
dition Of anarchy in which that coun-
try is plunged and, by securing order
In Mexico, insure peace on our border.
Ashland tidings. [volume] (Ashland, Or.) 1876-1919, 1916-08-28

Supreme courts upholds Chambers
Power Co., of Eugene, in its fight for
the right to widen its ditch to so feet.
Ashland tidings. [volume] (Ashland, Or.) 1876-1919, 1916-08-28

The second half taxes in Jackson
county become delinquent on October
8. Taxpayers should see to it that
their taxes for the year are cleared up
by this time in order to avoid paying
the delinquency penalty.
Ashland tidings. [volume] (Ashland, Or.) 1876-1919, 1916-08-28

Just as you are pleased at finding
faults you are displeased at finding
Observation-Disclosures.
Ashland tidings. [volume] (Ashland, Or.) 1876-1919, 1916-08-28

Eli Bushwood and Nate Natstead
are on a prospecting trip into Siski-
you county.
Ashland tidings. [volume] (Ashland, Or.) 1876-1919, 1916-08-28

Bryan reiterates that he is out for
Wilson. "Hark from the tomb dole
full sound."-Phlladelphia Inquirer.
Ashland tidings. [volume] (Ashland, Or.) 1876-1919, 1916-08-28

FOR SALE-Pure cider vinegar-the
kind you want for pickles. Thirty
cents per gallon, delivered. Phone
Air. t1t
Ashland tidings. [volume] (Ashland, Or.) 1876-1919, 1916-08-28

FOR SALE-0ne good 4-year-old
miloh COW, one 2h-inch lumber
wagon. Will sell or trade for
lighter one. Insquire Sam King,
east end Siskiyou Boulevard.
lola. 28-2t*
Ashland tidings. [volume] (Ashland, Or.) 1876-1919, 1916-08-28

Inadequate" aptly characterizes the
Wilson administration, but almost any
synonym Of unsatisfactory will do.
Ashland tidings. [volume] (Ashland, Or.) 1876-1919, 1916-08-28
Advertisements
TOO LATE TO CLASSIFY.

FRUIT WANTED-We want 25
quarts of canned pears and 20
quarts of canned peaches. We will
furnish the cans. Telephone 4OS-J.
2S-2t*
Ashland tidings. [volume] (Ashland, Or.) 1876-1919, 1916-08-28

The insuperable handicap of the
Democratic party In this campaign is
Its record.
Ashland tidings. [volume] (Ashland, Or.) 1876-1919, 1916-08-28

FOR SALE AT A PROFIT-Forty-
acre orchard, hay land, improve
ments, etc. If you want it come
and see it. No time to answer
questions. Three miles southeast
from Ashland, Route l, Box 1872.
28-2t%
Ashland tidings. [volume] (Ashland, Or.) 1876-1919, 1916-08-28

WANTED-The Tidings will pay SC
per pound for big clean rags. 28-tf
Ashland tidings. [volume] (Ashland, Or.) 1876-1919, 1916-08-28

IF YOU WANT a room, apartment or
house in the finest location in
town, call up Barber's and see if
anything is vacant. Phone AIR.
IL
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1916-11-04
CONCERNING PORTER.

In the half-dozen cases complained
of by the labor unions it is true that
Judge Porter wrote the opinions; but
he did so at the direction of the court
every one of whom Joined in the de-
cision. Thus an attack upon him is
an attack upon the court
There was one case, however, IN
which he dissented from the opinion
of the court. That case went to the
supreme court of the United States,
which reversed the decision of the,
supreme court of Kansas, and adopt
ed the view taken by Judge Porter in
his dissent.
1t is not believed that the venerable
gentleman, Hon. John T. Little, ex-
attorney general of the state under
Populist rule, is party to this trick.
The voters, Democrats and Republic
cans alike, should and doubtless will
rebuke this attempt to recall judge
who has declared the law as he un-
derstands it to be.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1916-11-04

IT can at least be said to the great
credit of all those who have partlcl-
pated in the presidential campaign
which has now reached it's final stages
that it has been an exceptionally clean
one And surely this can not be the
reason that it has aroused so little in
terest among the people. Probably
less national politics have been talked
on the streets of the country during
this presidential campaign than ever
before in the political history of the
country. Evidently the silent vote"
has not only reached enormous pro-
portions but it is also living up to its
name
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1916-11-04
RoosEvEIrs REASONS.

In the Metropolitan Magazine for
December. Colonel Roosevelt presents
an array of arguments in his usual
forceful fashion as to why he thinks
all good Americans should support Mr..
Hughes. the Republican presidential
nominee. at the important election on
Tuesday next. Mr.. Roosevelt insists
that Mr.. Wilson has put safety first
and duty last And in the course of
his article in the Metropolitan he
says:
Mr.. Wilson has treated every
promise he ever made. every campaign
pledge he ever gave, as something to
be broken with entire sflamelessness
if it was to his advantage to break it.
Neither his campaign promises nor
his platform pledges have the slight
est value or are worth even a mo-
ment's consideration; for the only
thing his record most clearly shows
is that, whatever he may at any time
promise or stand for, it is unlikely
that he will ultimately do. 1t is not a
case of, occasionally changing his
mind, or of progressing to the right
progress, he merely shows vacillation
on almost every subject; he changes
his mind with no reason except that
of political expediency; and in the
most important matters his policies
have been tissues of mistakes thruout.
His words and his deeds have contra
dicted one another on almos. every
important subject. His promises have
almost always been falsified by his
performance. He has put safety first
and duty last. He has made the ma
tional honor the subject of sordid bar
ter and abject surrender
1T is no pleasure to me to attack
Mr.. Wilson. If he had only acted as
he ought to have acted, I should now
be supporting him with all my heart;
for this is SO great a crisis that 1
should subordinate all other consid-
erations to the desire to meet it hon
orably and effectively. 1 have unhes-
itatingly supported political opponents
whenever 1 thought them right
have unhesitatingly supported Senator
Chamberlain of Oregon in his fight for
universal service. 1 have unhesitat-
ingly supported Senator Husting of
Wisconsin in his stand against the eff
fort of certain German-Americans to
make him subordinate his duty to the
United States to the interests of Ger
many When Mr.. Wilson himself
stood against the proposals to prevent
the shipment of munitions to those
engaged in the effort to rescue Bel
GUM, 1 unhesitatingly supported him.
oppose him for reelection now only
because his actions as a whole have
been fraught with degradation and
dishonor to this country, because he
has dulled the moral sense of our peo
pie and has weakened their power to
do right, and because unless we re-
pudiate him at the polls we as a peo-
pie ourselves become responsible for
the evil that he has done in our
name.'
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1916-11-04
SIDE T ALM S
For the Newly-Weds.
BY RUTH CAMERON.


Great goodness said the Author
Man to a newly-wed neighbor of ours,
didn't you hear what your wife said ?"
NO" said the newly-wed neighbor,
placiGly removing his pipe, was it
anything important ?'
Il should say so,'' said the Author
Man, "she said her new hat wasn't be-
coming"
"Well?" said the neighbor.
well ?"echoed the Author-Man.
cont you know she'll be telling you
that you said her hat was a sight ?'
But 1 didn't say anything of the
sort objected the neighbor
wife. oAe IN ms
"AhaI" said the Author-Man. ta-
umphantIy. What was telling you ::
she said it to see what you'd say, and
when you didn't say anything, that
meant that you thought it was unbe-
coming Don't you know that lots of
MED, and that if you don't deny them
they store them up against you?"
Are women like that?" said the
newly-wed one. rather aghast.
They're not bit" protested the
nc wly-wed's wife, don't you believe
him, deari''
And didn't you just prove it?" re-
torted the Author-Man. Take a leaf
from my DOCK, he went on, with the
patronizing manner of the long-wed to
the newly-wed. All women want to
be treasured about this or that all the
time. When I was first married, I let
some of these things slip, and by-and-
by they would be brought up to me.
Now 1 never miss them. Sometimes
I'll be reading or thinking, and not
really hear what she says, and then I'll
come to with a start and hear it echo
ing in my mind. I've got my SUBJ
conscious mind so trained that it
catches things like that and warns me.
| Another thing-never argue or be
impatient with woman when she
wants to be treasured. Some of the
things will sound perfectly unreason-
able to you and you will want to argue
with her. Don't do it. If she says,
DO you really love me?' don't say
Would I be working all day to support
you and coming home to spend my
evenings with you if 1 didn't? Just
take her in your arms and tell her you
love her, One day longer, one night
stronger than I loved you, dear, be-
FORE
'Oh, I like that cried the newly
wed wife, with her eyes shining
where did you get it?''
you Sect said the Author Man
Copyright by George Matthew Ad-
amS)
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1916-11-04
DINNER STORIES

The minister was questioning his
Sunday school concerning the story of
Eutychus. the young man who while
listening to the preaching of the Apos-
tie Paul, fell asleep, fell out of win
dow, and was taken up dead.
What" he asked. do we learn
from this Bible story?"
The reply from a little girl came
quickly:
please, sir, ministers should learn
not to preach too long sermons"
Funny thing about your office I
notice you never employ a cookbook
ing stenographer."
THE first one I ever hired was a
peach; she selects all her successors
But what became of the peach ?''
"Oh, 1 married her.
I'm thinking of opening an all
night hat store next door to some
fashionable restaurant
whats the idea %
IF a restaurant patron doesn't feel
like tipping the hat boy he can walk
out bareheaded, drop into my store
and buy a new hat
When ye're whipped" said Mr..
Dolan. we ought to say we've had
enough" If I've the strength left
to say I've had enough replied Mr..
Rafferty,. I'm not whipped yet"
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1916-11-04
JAYMAWKER JOTS

If you keep your old clothes long
enough, advises the Anthony Bulletin,
they will come back in style.
Cats and campaign lies may be
killed eight times, says the Norton
Champion, and yet climb the fence for
a dark season of caterwaling.
That dishwater may put a shine on
china but that it absolutely ruins the
polish of fingernails is the annoying
discovery. of Olathe's most recent
bride, reports the Olathe Register
Time has a way of removing wor-
ries." remarked a bald-headed man
within the hearing of the Lawrence
Journal-World, as he recalled the wor-
ry of his boyhood was that he was
unable to part his hair.
Baron Munchausen's tales always
had an unsual attraction for us, says
the Olathe Register, and since reading
them we have found nothing that gave
us greater joy than recent perusal of
a page ad telling how prohibition has
failed in Kansas.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1916-11-04
GLOBE SIGHTS
From the Atchison ciobe.l

From the Atchison G1obeJ
A pretzel in Kansas usually looks
lonesome.
A good many of us can do our best
without breaking any records.
Alb Adkins says of the rank and file
that they are usually pretty rank.
Gossip is so busy we wonder how
they ever came to refer to it as idle
gossip"
The only sort of poetry some peo-
pie admire is the kind they don't I'M
derstand.
There are plenty of fault finders,
but comparatively few critics who get
paid for it.
A breach of promise suit is usually
based on the presumption that the
man has the money.
You probably will get farther in
the right direction on your own hook
than by following leader.
The farmer boys do fairly well in
view of the fact that they have very
little time to devote to boy scouting.
1t may be all right for a poor. weak
woman to boss her husband but when
she kills him, that is going Too Far.
Life is a sort of fifty-fifty PROPOSE
ton, and you should be as willing to
believe good as you are to believe
evil.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1916-11-04

During the past year or so. the
number of automobiles in use in To-
peka has increased greatly, and, of
course, the end in this direction is not
yet. This may explain to some extent
the numerous automobile accidents of
one sort and another that are happen
ing daily on the city's streets. And
this suggests that perhaps the solution
of the automobile problem in Topeka
is to be found only in increasing the
number of streets and making them
cven wider.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1916-11-04


These days called the saddest make
us quite the gladdest of creatures, we
greet them with cheer; the pleasures
of autumn, whatever you've thought
'em, to US are the pick of the year.
The weather grows chilly and youths
become silly, they risk all their bones
and their cords; while grief-stricken
mommers call up the embalmers; the
pigskin is back on the boards. We
love just 20 ramble or gaily to gambol
midst leaves that are faded and sere
and greatly we favor their sweet burn
ing SAVIOR, it's really poetic, my dear.
Sometimes with a lady we stroll thru
Already and point out the tints on the
trees, or vines heavy-laden and say to
the maiden, Some scenery, some
scenery is these!" Who dotes on this
season may soften his reason, such air
and such skies, goodness mel He
may be quite nutty, quite dwelling,
but he has every good reason to be-
And soon in due course IL that deli
cate morsel the pie we call punkin,
delight; the while We do grapple with
oyster and apple-good eating? Good
eating is right!
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1916-11-04
MEMBER:
Associated Press.
Audit Bureau of Calculations
American Newspaper Publishers
Association.

In their enthusiasm over the pros
perity that prevails thruout the couh-
try. some of the Democratic spelbind-
ers have even gone so far as to point
with pride to the record prices that
corn and wheat are bringing, and
what this means for the pocketbooks
of the great farming class. But not
a one of them so much as mentions
the high cost of living that has become
such an oppressive corollary to this
same general prosperity and what 1t
is doing to the pocketbooks of the con-
sumers.