Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1916-02-23
Have you-have you lost your
money? she asks.

thought a man worked with his hands
or his head instead of becoming
mountebank'
""The calling of halberdier,' says |
he, is an ancient and honorable one. !
Sometimes says he, the man-at-arms
at the door has saved the castle while !
the plumed knights were cake walk
ing in the banquet halls above
az see you're not ashamed says
she, of your peculiar tastes. I won /
der, though, that the manhood 1 used |
to think I saw in you didn't prompt |
you to draw water Or hew wood In
stead Of publicly Haunting your igno-
miny in this disgraceful masquerade
"Sir Percival kind of rattles his ar
NOR and says: Helen, will you suspend
sentence in this matter for just little [
while? You don't understand says he.
I've got to hold this job down a bit
longer
"'You like being a harlequin-or hal
berdier, as you call it?' says she.
"I wouldn't get thrown out Of the
job just now,' says he, with a grin, to
be appointed minister to the court of
St. James,
"And then the forty HIP. girls eyes
sparkled as hard as diamonds.
every well,' says she. You shall
have full run of your serving mans
! tastes this night And she swims over
to the boss desk and gives him a smile
| that knocks the specks of his nose.
81 think your Rindslosh,' says she,
is as beautiful as a dream. 1t is a
little slice of the old world set down
| in New York. We shall have a nice
supper up there, but if you will grant
us one favor the illusion will be per-
fect-give us your halberdier to wait On
our table,
"That hit the boss anthology hobby
| just right. Sure says he, dot will be
fine. Und der orchestra shall blay die
Wacht am Rhein" all der time And
he goes over and tells the halberdier to
go upstairs and hustle the grub at the
sWells' table.
"1'm on the job says Sir Percival,
taking off his helmet and hanging it
on his halberd and leaning 'em in the
corner. The girl goes up and takes
her seat, and [ see her jaw squared
tight under her smile. We're going to
be waited on by real halberdier,
says she, one who is proud of his pro-
fessiOn. Isn't it sweet?
"'Ripping,' says the swell young
man. Much prefer a WAITER says the
fat old gent. I hope he doesn't come
from a cheap museum says the old
lady; he might have microbes in his
costume
Before he goes to the table Sir Per
cival takes me by the arm. Eighteen
says he, I've got to pull off this job
without a blunder. You coach me
straight or I'll take that halberd and
make hash out Of YOU And then he
goes up to the table with his coat Of
mail On and a napkin over his arm and
waits for the order.
"'Why, it's Deering!' says the young
swell. Hello, old man. What the
"NBeg pardon, SIR interrupts the hal
berdier, I'm waiting on the table,
''The old man looks at him grim, like
a Boston bull. so, Deering,' he says,
you're at work yet
eyes, SIR says Sir Percival, quiet
and gentlemanly as could have been
myself, for almost three months now
You haven't been discharged dur
ing the timer asks the old man.
"'Not once, SIR says he though I've
had to change my work several times.
Waiter orders the girl, short and
sharp, another napkin He brings her
one, respectful.
Il never saw more devil, if I may say
it, stirred up in lady. There was two
bright red spots on her cheeks, and her
eyes looked exactly like a wildcats I'd
seen in the zoo. Her foot kept slapping
the floor all the time.
WAITER she orders, bring me fl
tered water without Ice Bring me a
footstool. Take away this empty salt
cellar She kept him on the jump
She was sure giving the halberdier his.
"There wasn't but a few customers
up in the slosh at that time, so I hung
out near the door so I could help Sir
Percival serve.
"He got along fine with the olives
and celery and the blue points. They
was easy. And then the consomme
came up the dumb waiter all in one
big silver tureen. Instead of serving
it from the side table he picks it up
between his hands and starts to the
dining table with 1t. When nearly
there he drops the tureen smash on
the floor, and the soup soaks all the
lower part Of that girls swell silk
dress.
Stupid says she, Civ.
; Ing him a look. standing in a cor.
ner with a halberd seems to be your
mission in life
, "'Pardon me, lady says he. Tt was
just little bit hotter than blazes. ]
r couldn't help it,
O "The old man pulls out a memoran
! dunn book and hunts in it. The 25tl
of April, Deering,' says he. I know
it, says Sir Percival. And ten min
G utes to II O'clock says the old man
Ru I11n