davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Shoshone journal. [volume] (Shoshone, Idaho) 1884-1931, 1916-12-01
Two Ways Of "cIeanina Up

Some years ago a young man from
Il small country town, on visiting Gin
cinnati. walked into one Of the down
town barber shops to have his hair
cut
After the barber had clipped for
some time on the young mans head he
asked him If he hadn't better have his
hair cleaned up. The young man, after
glancing at the hair on the floor and
thinking the barber was trying 10 put
one over on him. said he GUESSED not. !"
After asking the same question sew
eraI times to no avail the barber gave
it up. The young man paid his bill
and went from the shop, laughing to
himself, thinking he wasn't 50 green
after ALL
Afterward ii dawned on him that
the barber wanted only 70 give him a
shampoo.
Shoshone journal. [volume] (Shoshone, Idaho) 1884-1931, 1916-12-01

The editor Of the correspondence
columns had a very busy day-a very
busy day, indeed. So busy. in fact,
that he had to enlist the services of
'he sub" To read out the correspond
ence.
What is the next query?" re asked.
when he had gone half way through
the pile of letters.
oh" replied the sub "A resder
wants to know how TO prevent the
hairs in his mustache from falling
out What shall 1 put down. sir?"
We'll" answered the editor, with
sigh. just put down: The best way
to prevent hairs from Falling out is TO
brush them lightly apart, aad keep
them from quarreling
Shoshone journal. [volume] (Shoshone, Idaho) 1884-1931, 1916-12-01
MEAN TRICK HARD TO BEAT
According 20 Fat Plumber, RE Wit
messed Action That Would Seem
to Be the Limit.

81 have spotted another 'meanest
man."
1t was the fat plumber who spoke.
"Who is it this timer the thin car
penter asked.
Unison"
What's Unison been doing?"
He took me to dinner with him in
a swell hotel the other evening"
do you call that mean?"
mo, but listen"
81 am listening"
when we had finished he took
small piece of tinfoil that had COW
cred little square of cheese"
"Uh huh"
"Placed it on n silver dollar to get
a perfect impression"
Yes
And then left the impression on
his plate so the winter would think
he was getting a fine tiD."-YOungs-
town Telegram.
Shoshone journal. [volume] (Shoshone, Idaho) 1884-1931, 1916-12-01
Why Rheumatism Comes With Cold Weather

dOTT PIERCE. NJ. d.
cold weather. and some people are 50
susceptible that they soon develop
rheumatism after eating meat.
At all such times persons should
drink copiously of hot water, say, a
pint morning and night, and take An
uric three or four times a Gay. This
Anuric comes in tablet form and can
be had at almost any drug store. 1t
disSolyes the uric acid in the system
and carries il outward. l would advise
everyone TO take it occasionally, and
continue for three or four weeks, and
in that way avoid rheumatism. govt
and many of the painful disorders die
to uric acid in the system.
Make yourself healthy and strong by
open-air exercise and diet. Then clean
the liver by occasionally stimulating
its action with a pleasant laxative
composed Of the May-apple. dried juice
of aloes, and root of jalap. Sugar.
coated and long sold by all druggists
as Drs Tierce's Pleasant Pellets --Ads.
Shoshone journal. [volume] (Shoshone, Idaho) 1884-1931, 1916-12-01
ThouohtfuI Wife

A man condemned TO be hanged was
visited the day preceding his execution
by his wife Gan ignorant wOman). who
as the sequel will show, intended to
have no hitch in the carrying out OF
the sentence. After the anxious in
quiries about his health had been made
and answered he noticed that she had
two parcels. and asked whs4 was in
them.
Wife-This one contains a change of
linen for you.
Husband-And the other one?
Wife-Oh. that is the clOthesline l
brought it. as l did not know whether
they found the rope or we had to
provide one"
Shoshone journal. [volume] (Shoshone, Idaho) 1884-1931, 1916-12-01
OF Course He Wouldn't Ask.

Oliver ha,- been taught that il was
naughty to ask anyone for pennies
His mother noticed he had come home
several times with a penny. so one
day she asked oliver, where did yoa
get your penny?"
Oliver Immediately replied: From
the sweeper man" tmeaning the street
s-~eeper).
Did you ask the sweeper man for a
penny?"
No. mamma, I just 90 up to the
sweeper man and say. I am looking
for a penny today and he gives me-
one"
Shoshone journal. [volume] (Shoshone, Idaho) 1884-1931, 1916-12-01

The value Of $4,000 is placed by a
California court on the eyesight of a
child. destroyed through the careless
ness of an attendant at the ehilds
birth. "a pair OF baby's eyes are
pa ,ceIess," said the cp1rt.
And so they are-they cannot be pur-
chased at any figure The mere none
tary recompense TO the paren. 5 moth
ing. For what mere money viii atone
to the mother in her grief that her
child must be doomed to a life
of night?
The eyes are priceless; they thrive
on care; they suffer from Indifference,
carelessness, Overwork, Overstrain.
And when they 20 they never return.
Shoshone journal. [volume] (Shoshone, Idaho) 1884-1931, 1916-12-01

Dodd's Kidney Pills and they relieved
me again. I used three boxes. That
is now three years ago and my Back
ache has not returned in its severity,
and by using another two boxes lit
tie later on, the pain left altogether
and l have had no trouble since. You
may use my statement. I recommend
Dodd's Kidney Piuz when and wher-
ever 1 can" Oouo's Kidney Pills. Soc.
per box at your dealer or Dodd's Medi-
cine Co., Buffalo, \. Y.-Adv.
Shoshone journal. [volume] (Shoshone, Idaho) 1884-1931, 1916-12-01
He Knew

Little Edward was listening careful
" 10 the conversation of his elders,
puzzled over the many long words he
did not understand when he heard
his grandfather call a certain person
an optimist. Edward Frightened.
'Oh." cried he, 4 know what that
is"
'-Well. Edward" said his grandpa
Their. what. then. is an optimism
why" said Edward. the man who
fits you with spectacles :"
Shoshone journal. [volume] (Shoshone, Idaho) 1884-1931, 1916-12-01
Useless Visitor.

Say. young Teller. said Bronco Bob,
have YOU got gun on your"
NO, sir replied the man with the
brand-new cowboy uniform. Il was
told that it was better to be unarmed.
so as TO avoid any impression that
was seeking Il quarrel
'Wen. that's big disappointment.
l needed brand new gun an thought
you'd be bringin' along at least pair
OF 'em. Don't you let anything ike
this occur again. Washington Star.
Shoshone journal. [volume] (Shoshone, Idaho) 1884-1931, 1916-12-01
HAD ALL QUALITIES NEEDED
Lacked Was Not at All Neces-
sary for Success.

Il can" said the bashful young man
to the director of the film company,
swim, dive, run an auto, fly an air
plane, fence. box, shoot, ride horse.
run motor boat. play golf, fight. make
love. fall of lifts, rescue herOines,
play football, die naturally and kiss
a girl"
But Interrupted the famous direc-
tor. "can you act2"
Alas ~ muttered the wOuld-be
screen hero, II neS,r thought of that"
Engaged" growled the director. and
another screen star was bOrn.-Life.
Shoshone journal. [volume] (Shoshone, Idaho) 1884-1931, 1916-12-01
Pretty Often. Loo.

During a Bible lesson teacher was
trying to explain the parable of the
tareS.
Can anyone tell me any person who
is like the evil one who Sowed the
tares?"
A hand Instantly shot up from the
foot of the class.
well. David. what persun do you
say?"
please. ma am. my mother
"Why?" asked the teacher III aston
ishment
Because answered he, eying
his patched trousers, 'She sews tears"
Shoshone journal. [volume] (Shoshone, Idaho) 1884-1931, 1916-12-01
RED, ROUGH, PIMPLY SKIN
Quickly Cleared by cuticurs Soap and
Ointment. Trial Free.

You may rely on these fragrant,
super-creamy emollients to care for
your skin, scalp. hair and hands. Moth
ing better to clear the skin of pimples,
blotches. redness and roughness, the
scalp Of dandruff and itching and the
hands Of chapping and soreness.
Free sample each by mail with Book.
Address postcard, Cuticura, Dept. L,
Boston. Sold everywhere.-Ady
Shoshone journal. [volume] (Shoshone, Idaho) 1884-1931, 1916-12-01
Awful Wobbies.

Lewis. n minister's son, listened
gravely one evening while the minis
ter expressed mis- views regarding tight
skirts TO his wife.
The next Sunday morning Lewis
tried, by waving his hand and point
ing, to attract his fathers attention
toward two ladies entering the church.
His efforts seemed Co be in vain. and
at last he called:
Look quick. father, there's two aw-
full wobbies in the aisle"
Shoshone journal. [volume] (Shoshone, Idaho) 1884-1931, 1916-12-01

Mrs Exe-My girl has left me. She
said had so much company there was
roo much work to do.
Mrs. Wye-That'S singular. Mine
has left me. TOO. She said 1 had so
little company it showed l had no so
cial positiOn.-Boston Evening Tran
script.
Shoshone journal. [volume] (Shoshone, Idaho) 1884-1931, 1916-12-01

its last stages, !
tried Dodd's Kid
ney Pills. After
using two boxes I
was somewhat re-
lieved and : stop
ped the treatment.
In the spring Of
the next year I
had another at
taxi 7 Udut or
Shoshone journal. [volume] (Shoshone, Idaho) 1884-1931, 1916-12-01
Execution Noted.

II believe everything appeals to
Smiths sense of humor.n
II didn't when he fell down on a
concrete pavement and hit his funny
bone.
Shoshone journal. [volume] (Shoshone, Idaho) 1884-1931, 1916-12-01
Still, There Are Some.

Gosh ding :"
Whats the matter, friem?"
Il wish could find a hotel that was
run 10 suit ME"
ITS a difficult matter. friend This
hotel isn't run to suit me. and yet I
own it."-LOuiSville COurier-JOurnal.
Shoshone journal. [volume] (Shoshone, Idaho) 1884-1931, 1916-12-01
Exact Copy Of Wrapper.
The Secret Out.

The widower and the exwidOwer
CHANGED to meet in Il downtown wet
goods emporium.
You seem to be remarkably happy
since you married the second time, "
embarked the widower. whats the
explanation"
My wife is Il firm believer in fairy
stories. See?" rejoined the ex-wid-
over.
And as the seeing was good, the 9TH
er looked through the bottom of his
glass and saw clearly.
Shoshone journal. [volume] (Shoshone, Idaho) 1884-1931, 1916-12-01
Their Glass.

"A doctor can't make an honest liv-
ing"
"Why can't he?"
Because since his income comes en-
tirely from sick people, his are i'll
gotten gains."
Shoshone journal. [volume] (Shoshone, Idaho) 1884-1931, 1916-12-01
Ills a Scale of Wealth.

Rich Brothers folks may occasion
ally need a surgeon, but Poor Broth
er's folks never need anybody except
the family doctor-Fort Worth Star
Telegram.
Shoshone journal. [volume] (Shoshone, Idaho) 1884-1931, 1916-12-01
DRUGGISTS HIGHLY RECOMMEND
DIR. KILMERS SWAMP-ROOT
Satisfied With Results

I have been selling DR.. Kilmer' 5
Swamp-Root for six and one-half years
and my customers are always satisfied
with the results obtained from the use
of the medicine ard speak favorably re-
garding it. l have used it for pain in
the back and a bottle or two put me in
good shape and made me feel fine again.
believe DR.. Kilmer's Swsmp-Root viii
cure any cases for which It is recommend
ed if they are not Of too long standing.
Very truly yours,
FRANK JENKINS, Druggist.
Pilgrim, Texas.
Shoshone journal. [volume] (Shoshone, Idaho) 1884-1931, 1916-12-01
PUT BUSINESS LESSON FlRsF
Youngster Had Excellent Defense
When Hauled Before the Pareats,
Tribunal for Fighting.

MY SON"
yes. pop"
do you remember what yog<
Sunday school teacher told you aboaz
fightings"
Eyes, sir
-Then why did You strike that Hem
mandhaw boy with your fstE"
@He struck me first
~But what about your Sunday school,
lessOn?'
"T thought about your lesson first
What lessOn?'
"YOur business lesson"
at am afraid do not know WHAT
you mean"
You told me always IN do every
thing in strictly business way"
yes
4Well. when he delivered a waIlopa
on my nose / just mad to give him =
receipt. T-Youngstow Telegram
Shoshone journal. [volume] (Shoshone, Idaho) 1884-1931, 1916-12-01
THE PROFESSORS STATEMENT.

Prof. Aug. F. W. Schmitz. Thomas.
Okla, writes: Il was troubled with
Backache for about twenty-five years.
When told I had Bright's Disease in
Shoshone journal. [volume] (Shoshone, Idaho) 1884-1931, 1916-12-01
Same Principle.

Willis-What system do these mill
tary airplanes work on?
Gillis-One person runs the machine
and the other is just an observer, but
both of them fight.
Willis see; just like being mar
ried
Shoshone journal. [volume] (Shoshone, Idaho) 1884-1931, 1916-12-01

The vain show attracts the eye, but
makes heavy the heart.
Shoshone journal. [volume] (Shoshone, Idaho) 1884-1931, 1916-12-01

To keep clean and healthy take Dr.
Pieree's Pleasant Pellets They regulate
liver, bowels and stomaeh.-Adv.
Shoshone journal. [volume] (Shoshone, Idaho) 1884-1931, 1916-12-01
Odious Comparison.

II have seen potatoes worth their
weight in gold" said the man from the
KlOndike.
1.-THE idea, exclaimed Miss Cayenne.
''of comparing anything so precious as
a potato TO mere jewelry.'r
Shoshone journal. [volume] (Shoshone, Idaho) 1884-1931, 1916-12-01

\ woman may be as old as she looks.
but she is seldom as young as she
acts.
Shoshone journal. [volume] (Shoshone, Idaho) 1884-1931, 1916-12-01

Retter drawback than setback
Shoshone journal. [volume] (Shoshone, Idaho) 1884-1931, 1916-12-01
Prove What Swamp-Root win Do For You

ghmton N Y
Youw villa
for at al
Shoshone journal. [volume] (Shoshone, Idaho) 1884-1931, 1916-12-01
Customers Speak Fsvorabls

We have been handling Dr.. Eilinsr'r
Swamp-Root for fourteen years aud dHr-
ing all that time We never had a DIS
satisfied user Of DR.. Kilmer's swamp
Root; all Of our customers speak very
favorably regarding it. We know of
cases OF Gall Stones. Gravel, Casarrh or
Inflammation of Bladder and RheuDa-
tism where it produced the most b~nef-
cial results. We believe It IS good
medicine for the diseases for which 1t ia
intended.
Very truly ours,
McCUNE DRUG co.
By n. E. McCune,
Bridgeport. Tsxas-
November lfth 1915
Shoshone journal. [volume] (Shoshone, Idaho) 1884-1931, 1916-12-01

W. N u, Salt Lake City, No. es-ista-
The day book. [volume] (Chicago, Ill.) 1911-1917, 1916-09-21

Two-piece suit for street wear, at
right, and one-piece afternoon gown,
at left. Direct from Paris, these de-
signs are two of the stunning styles
for fall and winter wear.
"Petticoat Lane" will see no more
pleasing street costume during the
season than the one displayed above.
1t is a type that will delight the con-
sentative but stylish dressed woman.
The suit is made of margaux glove
skin twill, a sort of burgundy color,
with tan carTacul collar and cuffs. An
The day book. [volume] (Chicago, Ill.) 1911-1917, 1916-09-21

oxidized chain and buckles at the belt
line add dash to the dress. The hat
is the very latest thought in MILL
merry, ostrich feathers of cuTrant red.
The afternoon gown, at left, is
made of dark blue Lyons velvet with
an under shirt of blue and gold bro
cade. Side panels are of the same
shade of brocade. The -crossoVer
front is of flesh tuelle. The belt is.
dark blue with gold bead fringe.
The hat is of dark blue Lyons vel
vet, with Tam O. Shanter crown
and soft rim
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1907-1917, 1916-03-16

Hon. Clark Howell Asks Cues
TONS OF the GubernatOPial
Candidates.
4 RECENT issue of The Atlanta Constitu-
ton contained the following:

"The Constitution regrets, for the peoples sake
well for that of the candidates themselves
that the campaign has begun some three months
ahead of time, but since it is begun we propose
to PROFOUND questions to present and pros
pective candidates, which would raise for discus
sion the real and more vital issues before the
people Of this State today. The questions we
would offer to the candidates for Governor, and
to any who may be candidates, are these:
L. What remedy do you propose for the elimi.
nation of lynching and mob law in this State?
2. What remedy do you propose for the better
ment of conditions to iteracy in Georgia, and
for it's ultimate abolition from this State?
3. What remedy do you propose for the over
throw of usury and extOrtiOn in small-toWn banks
and the fixing of interest charges within the
bounds allowed by law?
4. viii you urge and demand the application
of these remedies, by proper legislative enactment,
and, in your executive capacity, enforce them to
the best Of your ability?
The candidates who make fitting and salts
factory answer to these questions will have begun
something substantial in the direction of real
Georgia progress; the man who command the
enactment, through popular voice, of the laws
needed in the solution of these problems, will
have done splendid service for the State.
What do you say, gentlemen? Georgia asks
you
Generalities, little barney and few per-
sonalities all have their part in any political cam
paign. But let's lay them aside long enough and
often enough to discuss" and so forth.
Not being a candidate for anything, [ won't
hurt my chances by trying my hand at an
swering Brother Howell's questions
(D Replying in Yankee fashion, l will
first inquire of Brother Howell What as
YOUR remedy for mob zoa0 and lynohings?
In 1915, systematic campaign was launch
ed from Atlanta, against Lac and Order.
The Haas Finance Committee acted as
Treasurer of the Reptile fund William J.
Burns acted as it's noisy, rampant organ of
publicity; the Governor of the State cOl1tded
qolh 1t, and the Atlanta papers connived by
their silence.
The most criminal methods were adopted
TO destroy the States case against most
guilty man, duly convicted of most henous
crime, against q fatherzess little aCorhing girl.
The detectives-as shown by the sworn
court records of Fulton County-made crimi-
nal efforts to frame up testimony, buy off wit
nesses, run off others, and bring the LoW and
ehe Courts into uniVersa1 contempt.
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1907-1917, 1916-03-16

charge and can prove, that the then Gov
ernor of the State attended his law office
during that very time that he received the
reports of these lawless detectives; and that
he Kept IN close personal touch aOath their
efforts TO DEFEAT THE LAW.
Where was the Hon. Clark Howell, all
that time?
What did he suppose the Haas Finance
Committee was trying to do?
What did he suppose w. j. Burns, and
c. w. Burke, and Dan Lehon were trying
to do?
The Burns gang were not put on the case,
until after the Supreme Court had affirmed
the court below, and had pronounced the
evidence sufficient
What lawful work could Haas Finance
Committee then do?
When Jews all over the Union were held
up for contributions, ito save Frank" h0a0
did Mr.. H0a0eW suppose the money acas going
to be spent?
When Burns Lehon, and Burke were work
inc with Rosser and Slaton. after the Su-
preme Court had finally adjudged the case,
what could the detectives and Franks lawyers
legally do?
When Slaton, the Governor, went to his law
Office to work in con junction with Burke on
the Frank case, what did Mr.. Howell think
of it?
He may say that he did not know it, then;
but he knows it, NOR, for he knows the state
ment would not be made in The Jefersonian,
if [ were not able to prove it.
When Governor prostitutes his office,
to retry and to elrtu0zzy acquit has oaon
client of q hdde0Ms crime, committed By
married man Of middle age, whose wife is
robust, and whose victim lost her life because
she ec0uzd not surrender her virtue, what does
Mr.. Howell think Of that?
Suppose it had been his little A. year-old
daughter!
Or suppose the convicted monster had been
Jew peddler, whose riches consisted Of the
pack on his back; or Gentle, who had to
drive a dray for a living
For what reason, and to be used hoaU did
the Jews of San Francisco and Los Angeles
send $4,000 to Atlanta, Ito save Frank?"
For what reason, and to be used hoao, did
the Jews of Chicago Boston, New York.
Philadelphia, New Orleans and every other
great city, send so many hundreds of thou
sands Of dollars 'to save Frank"
Who got all that money?
How could such prodigious sums be legiti-
mately used in the case, LITTER the Supreme
Court had finally disposed Of it?
Mr. Howell's brother is a partner of Hugh
Dorsey; and it is strange indeed, if Albert
and Clark Howell do not know anything Of
the heroic work done by Hugh Dorsey, in
following every crooked move Of the Burns
Burke gang, orod checAneating those criminals
at e0c1y turn.
have read many legal record, but none
has ever made such a profound impression
upon me, as the Extraordinary Motion for
new trial, filed by Franks lawyers, shattered
by Dorsey, and rejected By the Supreme
Court UNANINOUSLY.
The mpresson-profound, painful, yet in
The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1907-1917, 1916-03-16
THE JEFFERSONIAN

Sea, there isn't Confederate soldier VINO was
drawer and truer than those little Georgia
girls, Mary Phagan and Monteen Slower.
Nor should the splendid manhood Of John
corruptible, and willing to suppress what
he knew about Mary Phagan's hair and blood,
he could today have been in possession of
riches and infamay, just as some others are
It's an honor to human nature, that we
have such people yot-people who are poor In
pocket, but rich in the pure gold OF ch0racter
Let us see what answers Mr.. Clark Howell
will make to the following questions:
CD What do you say is the cause OF mob
law?
~ Do you believe it was legal for Gov
ernor Slaton to retry his client on the same
old evidence, reverse the courts and jury, and
put Frank where his escape qU0s only @ cues
ton Of q fen qUeeks?
(3) Are you engaged in the 'come back"
propaganda Of John NJ. Slaton?
These are fair question: 0aasqcer them!
Is it mob law in Pennsylvania when the
Roman Catholics attack a Baptist Church,
smash its windows, break iii upon its congre-
cation, and by vile curses and brutal blows
disperse the worshippers?
of New Jersey mob the Rev. Augustus Bar
nett, because he delivered a lecture on Martin
Luther?
Is it mob law when the Knights of Column
bus storm hotel in Denver, drag forth one
of its guests, kidnap him to remote spot,
beat him like a dog, and leave him in the
ditch, senseless by the roadside?
Is it mob law when Knight of Columbus
in jacksonville brutally curses a Methodist
preacher, and slap his face pubhczy, because
the minister had preached against Romanism
to his own congregation, from his own pulpit?
Is it mob law when band of Knights of
Columbus arm themselves with concealed
weapons, gain entrance to the hotel-room Of
Protestant lecturer, and shoot him to death,
because he refuses to surrender his constitu-
tional right to lecture on Romanism at the
Court House?
Is it mob law, when the Chicago Romanists
take possession of hall which has been
hired for Protestant lecturer, and raise such
a riot that the Catholic police refuse to allow
the lecturer to speak?
Let Mr.. Clark Howell beware how far he
goes, IN sonctioning the outside crusade
against the good name Of the State Of Georgia..
However willing he may be to foul his own
nest, he will discover that he is in a pitifully
small minority, composed chiefly of the At
lanto Chamber of Commerce, the L. & N.
Railroad lawyers, the Straus magazine, the
SlatonHearst Georgian, and handful Of
rich Hebrews.
Mr.. Howell has been Democratic national
committeeman long time, but it does not
necessarily follow that the place belongs to
him.
The second question propounded to guber-
Material candidates by Mr.. Howell is, "What
remedy do you propose for the abolition of
illiteracy?"
IF [ were candidate for Governor, and
such an editor as Clark Howell were to ask
me such q QUESTION. I fear MY renlles Mnuld
Honolulu star-bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1912-2010, 1916-02-21
PERSONALITIES

E. n. DENNI.SG, private secretary
of Cal E. Stone, general traffic man
ager of the Great Northern Pacific,
Is accompanying Mr.. Stone, who ar
rived, today on the Great Northern.
JOHN A. BECEWITH, Jr., of Oak
land, Great Northern Pacific Steam
ship Company agent there, arrived on
the Great Northern today with Cal
Stone, in order to see for himself the
beauties of Honolulu and the islands,
to describe them more accurately to
prospective passengers on the main
land.
; w. H. DEVLIN. a Sacramento attor-
ney, arrived on the Great Northern to-
day from the mainland. ~.>.
MRS. JOHN S. FORD, wife of Pur-
ser Ford of the Great Northern, will
arrive tomorrow on the Northern Pa
cific. She and her husband will en-
Joy second honeymoon here seeing
the Carnival. They were recently
married in San Francisco. :.