davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Parma herald. (Parma, Idaho) 1903-1917, 1916-04-27
Sugar Prices Soar On.

Portland-Sugar prices higher than
ever predicted before are predicted by
wholesale grocers. AS consequence
of the latest advance in the East there
will be 10-cent rise in the Portland
market Thursday, which will bring
the wholesale price up to So hundred
pounds. The highest price on record
was ss.05, which prevailed soon after
the war began. 1t is likely this record
will be exceeded in the next few days,
as the Eastern markets are strong.
The allies have been heavy purchasers,
and this is causing the advance.
The Parma herald. (Parma, Idaho) 1903-1917, 1916-04-27
Enlarge Creamery.

Moscow, Idaho = Work has started
on the cold storage plant of the Mos
COW Creamery company, which has
closed contrat with Spokane firm
for four-ton modern equipment, in
stalled. The butter room will have a
capacity of $4,000 pounds; one room
for eggs to hold 1000 cases; one room
will be kept at about zero for harden
ing ice cream; one for manufacture of
ice for the use of the creamery only,
and one for cream and milk. These
will all be in addition to the butter
making department and machinery.
The Parma herald. (Parma, Idaho) 1903-1917, 1916-04-27
Got Even.

A young man who had been snub-
bed at the theater door decided to get
even with his girl friends.
The girls occupied the first four
seats in the sixth row and the young
man had the fifth. They paid no at
tention to him. On the program was
a monologist who began to talk of
love to get few laughs. as those ar
lists often do. He said: "All the girls
who are in love, please stand up
Turning to the girl next to him, the
young man who had been snubbed
said:
Please let me out"
Naturally, the entire four had to
rise. When they were on their feet
the young man sat down, while the re-
mainder of the audience roared in glee
at the ur.-Philadelphia Public Led
ger.
The Parma herald. (Parma, Idaho) 1903-1917, 1916-04-27
start and Finish.

A publisher of this city is credited
with a unique criticism of story
teller who had begun promisingly, but
soon degenerated into the lowest type
of best seller"
This gentleman's biography said
the publisher, "can be comprised with
in two questions and answers thus:
How did he begin writingT
with a wealth of thought
How did he continues?
with a thought of wealth.
The Parma herald. (Parma, Idaho) 1903-1917, 1916-04-27
His Golden Wedding.

UP and down the village street
walked old Tompkins, dressed all in
his Sunday best, and with clean col
lar on.
Hello, old fellow!" a friend hailed
him. Aren't you working today?'
NO" replied the old man proudly.
"I'm celebrating my golden wedding"
Really? Then you've been mar
ried so yearsl"
Eyes, have"
"Then where's Mrs. Tompkins
Isn't she celebrating, too?"
''The present Mrs. Tompkins," the
old man coldly rebuked the idle ques-
toner, has nothing to do with it,"
The Parma herald. (Parma, Idaho) 1903-1917, 1916-04-27
Safety First

Brown and Green were discussing
dogs, and Brown declared that any
body could take the fight out OF a
savage dog by sitting down and star
ing straight at him.
Yes agreed Green, II once had
occasion to try it. The dog was com
ing at me as fast as he could, and all
that | could do was to sit down and
look him right in the eye"
Il am glad to hear you say that"
was the rejoinder of Brown. 1T is an
actual confirmation of what science
contends"
True" answered Green, but l
should have added that when | sat
down | chose for seat the top limb
of ninety-foot tree"
The Parma herald. (Parma, Idaho) 1903-1917, 1916-04-27
Correct.

Miss Wheat. the new teacher, was
hearing the history lesson, which
dealt with the career of George Wash
ington. Turning to one of the schol-
ars, she asked:
James, what was Washington's
farewell address,"
The new boy arose with a prompti-
tude that promised well for his an
swer.
Heaven, ma'am," he said.
The Parma herald. (Parma, Idaho) 1903-1917, 1916-04-27
Recognizing the Profession.

WAS your father pirate?" asked
young Fitztop of the girl of his choice
at clandestine meeting, after the old
sea captain had urged his exit from
the family mansion on the hill by the
use of his pedal extremity
mo, my darling" was the reply
why do you ask?"
HE seemed to me to be good deal
Of freebooter" said the young man.
Philadelphia Public Ledger.
The Parma herald. (Parma, Idaho) 1903-1917, 1916-04-27
Money In pandeIlon Roots.

Selling dandelion roots at 4 to 6
cents per pound offers a pretty fair
premium on removing the dandelion
pests from lawns, fields and pastures.
Since 100000 pounds or more are
imported annually into the United
States it seems that many young boy
or girl ought to make fairly good
wages by collecting and preparing
dandelion roots for the drug trade
The root is used incidentally in dis.
eases of the liver and dyspepsia, re.
ports II. S. Hammond, of the o. A. C.
Botany department, Corvallis Ore.
The Parma herald. (Parma, Idaho) 1903-1917, 1916-04-27
Life's Little Worries.

Can you wait on me immediately"
demanded the richly dressed woman.
I'm in a great hurry"
Yes. Let me have your prescrip-
tion," said the druggist.
II have no prescription. | want you
to look up 2. number for me in the tele-
phone BOOK"
The Parma herald. (Parma, Idaho) 1903-1917, 1916-04-27
A Reminder.

Look here" said the indignant
house owner to the agent from whom
he had bought his home on the install
ment plan. The paneling in my din
ing room is opening so you can put
your finger through the cracks"
That's all right" replied the agent.
THE house is settling. And that re-
minds me. It's about time you settled
up for last months installment."-
Philadelphia Public Ledger.
The Parma herald. (Parma, Idaho) 1903-1917, 1916-04-27
Effaced Maturity.

do you take as much interest in
dancing as you did ?"
YES" replied Uncle Wagglefoot.
but I'm gettin' so dancin' isn't youth
full enough for me. I'm practicin' roll
err skatin' on one skate. Washing
ton Star
The Parma herald. (Parma, Idaho) 1903-1917, 1916-04-27
In Modern Times.

''In the old days, the main element
of soldier was to know how to act
under fire"
And nowadays. in addition, he is
supposed to know how to act under
water, in the earth and without air"
Puck
The Parma herald. (Parma, Idaho) 1903-1917, 1916-04-27

The Department Of Farm Crops,
University of Idaho, has received dur
ing the spring, shipments of seed from
the following foreign countries: Can
ada, Sweden, Denmark, Australia, and
Japan. The Bureau of Plant Industry
of the U. S. Department of Agriculture
has also sent samples of clover and
other leguminous crops for the pur-
pose of cooperative testing expert
ments
The Parma herald. (Parma, Idaho) 1903-1917, 1916-04-27

A young wife demonstrated with her
husband. a dissipated spendthrift. on
his conduct. Love-" said he, Il am
like the prodigal son; shall reform
by and by"
II will be like the prodigal son, too"
she replied, for l shall arise and go
to my father"
The Parma herald. (Parma, Idaho) 1903-1917, 1916-04-27
so-caIIed Temnerate.u

"WLat zone is this live in? You
may answer, James," said the teacher
Temperate"
Now, what is meant by temper
ate zone?"
Its place where it's freezing cold
in winter and red-hot in sumner
Philadelphia Public Ledger.
The Parma herald. (Parma, Idaho) 1903-1917, 1916-04-27
The Touch P-e-EmInent

"a cosy picture, Ell? A man lolling
in an easy chair and his beautiful wife
leaning over him to light his cigar"
you haven't seen the companion
picture to it. have your"
why. no."
tits the same man savagely chew
ing the end OF his cigar and writing a
check"
The Parma herald. (Parma, Idaho) 1903-1917, 1916-04-27
Kill One. Of Course.

He (of the militia) Taps" are
played every night on the bugle. 1t
meant lights out" They play it over
the bodies of dead soldiers.
Miss Innocence-What do you do il
you haven't a dead soldier?-BostoD
Transcript.
The Parma herald. (Parma, Idaho) 1903-1917, 1916-04-27

spent The doctors
stated that l would
never get well with
out N operation
and that without it
! would not live one
year. My husband
o bj tie d to any
operation and got
me some of Lydia E.
Pinkham's vegeta-
BILE Compound. took
IL and commenced
The Parma herald. (Parma, Idaho) 1903-1917, 1916-04-27

AN phwat is your Patsy dom
these days, Mrs. O'Hagan?"
"Ah, he's dom foinel He's a con-
ductor in the opery house, an wears
a swallytail coat"
"A conductor, is it? An phwat does
a conductor do2"
HE conducts people to their seats.
The Parma herald. (Parma, Idaho) 1903-1917, 1916-04-27

to get better and am now well. am
stout and able to do my own Homework
/ can recommend the Vegetable Com
pound to any woman who is sick and
run down as wonderful strength and
health restorer. My husband says l
would have been in my grave ere this
If it had not been for your Vegetable
Compound. MRS. BLANCHE JEFFER-
SON, 703 Lyon St, Des Moines, Iowa.
Before submitting to surgical opera
ton it is wise to try to build up the
female system and cure its derange-
ments with Lydia E. Pinkham's Vege-
table Compound; it has saved many
women from surgical operations.
Write TO the Lydia e. Pinkham
Medicine Co., Lynn, Mass, Tor
ndvice-it will be confidential
The Parma herald. (Parma, Idaho) 1903-1917, 1916-04-27
Vain Regrets.

Never write letters, young man,
that you'll regret in afterlife."
You speak as from experience?"
81 do. In early correspondence with
her who is now my wife l signed my
self Your obedient servant An
swers.
The Parma herald. (Parma, Idaho) 1903-1917, 1916-04-27
Enterprising.

Visitor-Can see that motorist who
was brought here an hour ago?
Nurse-He hasn't come to his
senses yet.
Visitor-Oh, that's all right. / only
wanted to sell him another car
Judge
The Parma herald. (Parma, Idaho) 1903-1917, 1916-04-27
Gentle Criticism.

He-I see where young woman
killed herself because she could not
find an ideal husband. Women are
fools.
She-Yes, aren't they. to believe
there is such a thing ?-Baltimore
American.
The Parma herald. (Parma, Idaho) 1903-1917, 1916-04-27
What Dreams Are Made OF.

Dillydally "a chronic procrastinator)
Il dreamt last night that I-e--ah
proposed to you. l wonder what
that is sign of?
Miss Lingerlong (desperately)-It is
a sign that you have got more sense
when you are asleep than when you
are awake-Tit-Bits.
The Parma herald. (Parma, Idaho) 1903-1917, 1916-04-27

Have Healthy, Strong, Beautiful Eyes
Cculists aud Physicians used Murine Eye
Remedy many years before It was offered rs
Domestic Eye Medicine. Murine is Still Com
pounded by Our Physicians and guaranteed
b. them as Reliable Relief for Eyes that Need
Care. Try It In your Eyes and in Baby s Eyes
No smarting-Jus Eye Comfort Buy Murine
OF your Druggist no Substitute, and II
interested write for Book OF the Eye Free.
Murine EYE REMEDY CO., CHICAGO
The Parma herald. (Parma, Idaho) 1903-1917, 1916-04-27
Make ReIieve.

This is toy tea set my little girl
got for Christmas. She likes to serve
make-believe tea and make-believe
sandwiches. A harmless fancy"
Perfectly. I've been to .grown-up
affairs where they did it"-Louisville
Courier-Journal
The Parma herald. (Parma, Idaho) 1903-1917, 1916-04-27
For the Human system,

For cuts, burns, bruises, stiff neck,
sore throat, sprains, lame back and
bunions. use Hanford's Balsam of
Myrrh. 1t is guaranteed. 1t is for
external use only Always have bot
tie on hand, ready for accidents. Adv.
The Parma herald. (Parma, Idaho) 1903-1917, 1916-04-27
Making Headway.

Making any progress toward get
ting acquainted with those fashiona-
BILE people next door,"
"Just a little. Their cat invited
our cat over to a musicale last night"
About Town
The Parma herald. (Parma, Idaho) 1903-1917, 1916-04-27
Adoptlno SUGGESTION.

Talking about the total depravity
of inanimate things"
"Well?"
Just as we got opposite road
hotel with big gun, Sea Food Spe-
cialty,' our auto deliberately turned
turtle. Baltimore American.
The Parma herald. (Parma, Idaho) 1903-1917, 1916-04-27
A Grouchy Chap.

do you think any of the girls will
really propose this year?"
Il don't know But if they do hope
the men won't giggle and whisper it
around as some of the girls do
Courier Journal.
The Parma herald. (Parma, Idaho) 1903-1917, 1916-04-27
The Usual Exnerience.

Have you laid by anything since
you took up the profession of author
shipg"
Boston Transcript.
The Parma herald. (Parma, Idaho) 1903-1917, 1916-04-27
Keeps You Waiting.

1.-THE time. the place and the girl
are seldom found together"
''True. The girl is usually half an
hour late."-Louisville Courier-Jour-
nal
The Parma herald. (Parma, Idaho) 1903-1917, 1916-04-27
The Heroic Mood.

Stella-Did he think you had some
thing of the heroic in your mood!
Behaved, he proposed on $40 a
week.-Evening Sun.
The Parma herald. (Parma, Idaho) 1903-1917, 1916-04-27

"She froze him with a glance"
The man read this aloud from
novel.
Try that on the ice cream, my
dear" he ggested.-Louisville Cou-
rier-Journal.
The Parma herald. (Parma, Idaho) 1903-1917, 1916-04-27

And you broke off the engage
ment?" said one young man.
Eyes, but not brutally, you know.
But managed it.
Howl"
Told her what my salary was"
The Parma herald. (Parma, Idaho) 1903-1917, 1916-04-27

rs he typical Americana"
Yes; he likes baseball, has motor
car, owes mortgage. pays alimony,
and thinks the motion pictures have
grand opera beaten a mile. Life.
The Parma herald. (Parma, Idaho) 1903-1917, 1916-04-27
unobservino Fate.

Unobservine Fate
Full many flower is born to blush
unseen
And waste it's sweetness on the des-
ert air;
Or else to nod above the gasoline
Within the auto of some lady fair.
Evening Sun.
The Parma herald. (Parma, Idaho) 1903-1917, 1916-04-27
Slow.

"That waiter of ours has been In
this restaurant for 20 years."
II don't doubt it. 1t seems nearly
that long since l gave my order"
The Parma herald. (Parma, Idaho) 1903-1917, 1916-04-27
Silence.

Il see you're wearing rubber heels.
Don't you find them a great comfort?"
you bet l do My wife never
knows what time l come home from
the club now"
The Parma herald. (Parma, Idaho) 1903-1917, 1916-04-27

Don't any of your friends come to
see you on visiting days?" asked the
kindly old lady.
"No'm," responded No. 777,444 /;
they're all here wit me-"
The Parma herald. (Parma, Idaho) 1903-1917, 1916-04-27

"The audacity of this laundressl"
How now?"
after reducing my garments to
s1reds she tries to charge me by the
piece. louisville Courier-Journal.
The Parma herald. (Parma, Idaho) 1903-1917, 1916-04-27

as this beef too rare for you. Mr..
Simpkins?"
well, since you ask me. Mrs. Skin
ner, would like it little oftener."-
Baltimore American.
The Parma herald. (Parma, Idaho) 1903-1917, 1916-04-27
An Adept Student,

French VISITOR am learning re
language varey fast. Eat leetle boy
zare spinning his topics a spinster,
eh7-Boston Transcript.
The Parma herald. (Parma, Idaho) 1903-1917, 1916-04-27

Sprained ankle? Rub on and rub
in Hanford's Balsam thoroughly. Adv.
The Parma herald. (Parma, Idaho) 1903-1917, 1916-04-27
We Get You. Madam.

Mrs. Kawler-Did you ever go to
one of those astrologers?
Mrs. Blunderby-No; but my daugh-
ter Kate is just crazy to have her
periscope read.-Boston Transcript.
The Parma herald. (Parma, Idaho) 1903-1917, 1916-04-27
At the Boarding House.

Ask anybody about it-Hanford's
Balsam. Adv.
The Parma herald. (Parma, Idaho) 1903-1917, 1916-04-27
A loo WiIIinn Worker.

Yes, the boss said he was losing
money on the things | was making"
And what were you making?"
Mistakes. "-Philadelphia. Record.
The Parma herald. (Parma, Idaho) 1903-1917, 1916-04-27
HUSBAND OBJECTS
TO OPERATION
Wife Cured by Lydia E.
Pinkham's Vegetable
Compound

Des Moines, Iowa. =" Four years ago
/ was very sick and my life was nearly
The Parma herald. (Parma, Idaho) 1903-1917, 1916-04-27
Both Prodiqals.

Hanford's BaIsam is good for blood
poisoning. Adv.
The Parma herald. (Parma, Idaho) 1903-1917, 1916-04-27

WHEN writing to advertisers. please mem
ten this paper.
Brownsville herald. [volume] (Brownsville, Tex.) 1910-current, 1916-09-01
WISE GUYS WIN

This H. the season Of the year
When adyertising'S slack
When many bold their copy till
The cool. crisp day~ come back
Except tho merchants who are wise
Who III r1h smart trade
It- nilltv in the shade.
Bv keeping ads a-running when
THE Editor avs. Publisher.
Brownsville herald. [volume] (Brownsville, Tex.) 1910-current, 1916-09-01
MEAT MARKET NEEDED CLEANUP

II i Ike the.irony cf fate that lieuteu-
ant Miltenherver n hi~ inspection IF the
CITY Of Brownsville preliminary ~ a cirA
J cleaning CAMPAIGN should meet with nn-
lSanitarv and unhycitnic conditions II THE
Pity hall the first ''por ont ~ the box.
AAfter finding that the military police
g quarter were unscreened, over
Brownsville herald. [volume] (Brownsville, Tex.) 1910-current, 1916-09-01

"0ur Country. In her intercourse with
foreign nations, may she always be right.
,Dt our. coutry, right or wrong."-Stephau
Decatur
Brownsville herald. [volume] (Brownsville, Tex.) 1910-current, 1916-09-01
FfYS IIRER /, 1me

subscriber |rity ~ brownsville who
tail 10 receive ! erald regularly ere re-
guested q noths ice promptly. Telephone
No. q. Ne" NrN RS should receive their
6rst paper 49, Tan the second Jay after
the orsxr.i5rn tie office ~ The Herald Every
subscriber. even w rhs most distant sections of
the city. should receive bis paper not later than
0:45 p. 70.
The Madison daily leader. [volume] (Madison, S.D.) 1890-current, 1916-05-29
PRESIDENT MAY TRY
To END CONFLICT

Washington. May 20. President
Wilson is giving more serious consid-
Grafton to the possibility of restoring
peace to Europe than at any time
since the outbreak of the war. From
an authoritative source it was learned
that the president Is preparing to do
everything possible in an informal
way TO bring about the discussion OF
peace.
The president is convinced the war
is deadlocked and that a continuance
merely means the killing of more peo-
pie and the further impoverishment
of European nations, both belligerent
and neutral.
Through various channels Mr.. VII
son has kept In close touch with the
development Of peace prospects.
Mr.. Wilson's closest advisers be
lieve the rulers of warning nations,
because of their close relationship,
even kinship, will have as important
a part I'm restoring peace as the min
listers of their governments. It will
occasion no surprise In official circles
II i'm some amer the rulers OF the
countries at war open the way for
peace conversations.
The Madison daily leader. [volume] (Madison, S.D.) 1890-current, 1916-05-29
PROFIT BY THIS
Don't Waste Another Day.

When you are worried by back
ache;
by lameness and urinary disorders
Don't experiment with an untried
medicine.
Follow Madison peoples example.
Use Doan's Kidney Pills.
Here's Madison testimony.
Verify it if you wish:
j. T. Todd, carpenter, 702 West
Eighth street, Madison, says: u
had pains and weakness in my back
and the trouble grew worse until
became almost helpless. / wasn'i
able to get around and to add to my
misery, the kidney secretions became
highly colored, were too frequent in
passage and contained sediment.
finally procured. Doan's Kidney Pills
at f. c. Smiths drug store and be
fore | had finished the second box
/ was greatly helped. Three boxes
made me feel like a different man
The pains and aches left my back
and the kidney secretions cleared
up. l have scarcely felt a symptom
of kidney trouble since"
Price so cents, at all dealers. DOM
simply ask for a kidney remedy-get
Doan's Kidney Pills-the same thai
Mr.. Todd had. Foster-Milburn Co.
Props, Buffalo, N. Y.
The Madison daily leader. [volume] (Madison, S.D.) 1890-current, 1916-05-29

and read of a woman who felt as | did
and took Lydia E. P%inkham's Vegetable
Compound, so | took it too. Now | am
proud to tell you | am feeling fine and
have given birth to a boy baby. He is
my 'Pinkham' baby. l keep a bottle
of Compound in my house always. >
Mrs. PETER MARCO, Box 81, North
Oxford, Mass.
Sleeplessness, indigestion, weakness,
and are symptoms which
indicate a lowered vitality of the female
organism, and the tonic, strengthening
properties of the good cid fashioned
roots and herbs, contained in Lydia E.
Pinkham's Vegetable Compound, are
just what is needed by every woman
who is in Mrs. Marcos condition.
For free advice in regard to
any annoying symptom write to
Lydia Il. Pinkham Medicine Co.
(confidential). Lynn, Mass.
The Madison daily leader. [volume] (Madison, S.D.) 1890-current, 1916-05-29
TO MAKE THE BLIND SEE
Pittsburg inventor VIII Give Discov
cry TO the World.

Pittsburg, May 20. After expert
menting three years and spending a
fortune. Ethan I. Dodds, a Pittsburg
chemical engineer, has invented a ra-
dunn screen. which he believes wifi
eventually enable many who are blind
to sec
When the retina OF the eye is not
entirely destroyed he says that II will
yet be possible to carry an object TO
the brain through the optic nerve by
means OF the Green Patents ove
ing the invention have been applied
for. although Mr.. Dodds announces
this step is merely to protect the pub
lie from INSCRIPTIONS imitators and
that he will give the world the benefit
of his discovery.
The Madison daily leader. [volume] (Madison, S.D.) 1890-current, 1916-05-29
MONEY AID FROM AMERICA
Irish Rebels Secured Large Cash Con.
trlbutions.

Dublin. May 29.-The names OF
Judge Daniel Cohalan of the New York
supreme court and Dennis Spellissy
a New York lawyer, were mentioned
by Major Price In his testimony be.
fore the Irish commission investigat
ing the Sim Fein revolt In connection
with money SEN from America to the
Sim Feiners.
Major Price said 100000, mostly
American gold, reached the Irish sew
ol%utionlsts during the first six months
after the war broke out
The Sim Feiners then withdrew al
their funds from the banks and stop
ped making further deposits so II
was impossible to trace later sums
received. The witness added, how
ever, he was certain large sums had
been RENTED subsequently from the
United States.
The Madison daily leader. [volume] (Madison, S.D.) 1890-current, 1916-05-29
MADISON GRAIN MARKET.
SIOUX CITY LIVESTOCK MARKET

Sioux City, May 29.-The run of
cattle this week Is totaling greater
than both last week and the CORE
spending time a year ago, but this
has been due to the arrival Of several
train loads of southern stockers that
were unloaded for feed and water.
Salable supply has been moderate
and has consisted largely OF killing
grades. Today's run was light, as is
usually the case on a Saturday, and
prices remained nominally unchang-
ed in all branches.
An urgent demand existed
throughout the six-day period and
the best description of the deal is
for the season today, and the high
est in the history for a May. M a
general way the advance on killing
cattle is figured as 40 q soc for the
week, while additional strength has
been also noted on stock cattle, al
though the advance in this branch
has not been as spectacular as on
fat cattle.
Week end hog trade developed
further weakness in line with exist
ing conditions at eastern centers, de-
cline for the day being quoted at 5
a Toe. Top for the day was $3.50,
while the bulk of the sales were at a
spread of $3.50 9.45.
Sheep trade here has been nom
inal, hardly enough arriving each
day to give a line on prices for the
various classes. Eastern centers have
recorded a sharp break and had
there been sufficient stock here the
The Madison daily leader. [volume] (Madison, S.D.) 1890-current, 1916-05-29
STEVENS is SEEKING PLACE
Former ST. Paul Congressman After
Trade Com~lssionershlp.

Washington. May 29.-F. G. Stevens
former St Paul congressman, Is here
as a candidate for federal trade com.
missioner.
He Is seeking appointment by Presi.
dent Wilson to the vacancy caused
by the failure OF the senate to confirm
the nomination of George Rublee OF
New Hampshire.
An effort was made recently TO
have the senate reconsider It's action
In not confirming Rublee's nomina.
ton, but this failed. Reports then
were revived that the place would be
given TO Mr.. Stevens by President
Wilson.