The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1916-05-18

TIE EMMETT
they are sure to be either brother
or first cousins.
Small Jimmie had just been place.
in the chair by a baldheaded barber
"Well, my little man." said the bar
Der, chow would you like to have YOU
hair cut?" Like yours, if that's the
STYLE" replied the little fellow.
In reply to an anxious inquirer: To
remove ants from your pantry scatter
a few pieces of cracked ice on the
shelves-the ants will slip on the ice
and break their legs, They are very
easy to capture then.
4 z 4
A local citizen made several excus-
es to get away from home and go
down town the other night. Each at
tempt failed dismally. Finally he
told his wife he was going down to
the office to make arrangements to
come home 1t worked.
4
The statesman does the speaking,
The editor booms the town,
The lover does the popping,
The damsel turns him down.
The poet does the dreaming,
The farmer clears the woods,
The eagle does the screaming,
The stork delivers the goods.
4 4
To The Index: Can you suggest
that will remove superfu-
Gus hair from the top of my head?
My scalp would be perfectly smooth
and pink if it were not for about half
a dozen persistent hairs just at the
apex of the dome. Bill Misgivens.
Papa" said small Howard one
'ainy day, "aren't there any plumbers
n heaven?" eyes, l suppose So" an
'wered the father. "But why do you
lsk?" Because" replied the small
81 should think if there
vas God would make 'em fix the sky
% it wouldn't leak"
This story is told of married cou-
lie at the fair last fall: They found
themselves in the center of quite
rowd near one of the carnival booths
nd the husband addressed his wife
this wise: 81 say, dearie, | think
0u'd better give me the lunch basket.
,on't you see we are apt to lose each
Their in this crowd?"
We accept with caution the report
rom France that the German marks
lanship is falling off. Donald Thomp-
IN, the we'll known Kansas photog- !
,pher, who has been all over, thro
nd under the war, says the only safe
ace in a French town under German
tack is in the brewery. No brewery c
rs ever been struck by a German S
ell since the war began. |
hen Tommy comes marching home
again, all racked and torn by war,
b, he will ask the question then,
"What was l fighting for?"
nd Hans and Jean and Ivan, too, the 8
brave of many land,
wan and pallid, broken crew, who
cannot understand; r
Iey'll ask, ave, they'll demand to
know, to find out by what right
eir kings and princes made them go
by millions forth to fight,
fight and die on bloody plain, the
prey of shot and shell,
else endure on beds of pain the
very pangs of hell.
,e They will ask the question then,
"Now We who babe us die,
hat was your RIGHT? We, too, are
men!" How will the kings reply"
4 4 4
A girl married and went to a dis
ut city to live. In a letter to her
,ther received recently she wrote:
Iother, dear, am just beginning to
.lize what brought the lines in your
ar face, now that |, too, have such
ave responsibilities; last week at
club was elected chairman of the
committee and thus it
my responsibility increases" The
ther, whose responsibilities con-
ted in rearing family of eight
VS. and girls on very limited in
ne, who washed, ironed, cooked and
we'd for them, and for whom the
I'd club had only one meaning Ia II
apon for rough blows), swooned
EN- she read her daughters letter
has not yet been revived. i
lCHABOD'S REPORT. II