Norwich bulletin., 1916-02-22

Yes, mom," said the butcher who owned the fashionable provender shop, speaking politely into the telephone receiver. T don't understand, nom! been a mistake of my helper! No, mum, it won't occur again."
 He jammed up the receiver and sighed hugely as he turned to the waiting customer. T just hate" said the butcher in a burst of Confidence, customers daughter getting married nowadays! If they don't come here to trade they'll go somewhere else, and I have a heart to feel for my fellow ieve what the brides order and how they take it out on us when they get what they ask for!
 Now that young Mrs. Phipps," went on the butcher mournfully, as he got out the porterhouse steak joint at, that was just on the phone-why, she was so mad she couldn't talk straight! I'll betchu her ma or some one has told her that she must be very firm with us tradesmen and take no nonsense. because if she does we'll think she doesn't know anything and try to work off old goods on her!
 She said she ordered @ shoulder of lamb, boned, so'S she could have it rolled and stuffed-and when she went lO 1lA IL dI U ClOCh IL WASH pOIl0u at all! She said there were some tor- rid ribs and things in 1t! Well, you know, you have to leave in the rib bones and they don't matter at all if you know how to roll 1t! She said she called up her husband and just told him what I had done and he was most indignant and told her to come right downtown for dinner!
 'She never got over the time I recommended boiled ham and saure- kraut for dinner on zero night" con- tinued the butcher. She came in next day furious. She said the sauerkraut was the most awful stuff, and why I should expect any human being to eat it she didn't see, and that her husband said it tasted like no sauerkraut he had ever met on the earth or the seas beneath, and when I got a chance I asked her how she cooked 1t.
 Cooked it!' said she. Why I supposed it was already cooked when I got it, I just served 1t cold as it wasi I am sure that is the way we were taught in the domestic science cIass!' She had got it mixed up with coldslaw, you see, but I didn't dast tell her. Nothing makes them brides so mad as to be told their mistakesI
 "I lost young Mrs. Meeker for a customer just because I talked too much" went on the butcher sadly. She had kept house just a week aft CT getting back from her wedding trip and came in and looked everything over and said she guessed she'd have some chops, lamb chops. How many? says I with my knife in the air. She looked kinda wild and I pretended not to notice.
 'Three-four?' I prompted. She sorta swallowed and said Yes, that's it. Four pounGS!"
 Oh says I. I'll fix 'em all fine for your dinner party!' Then she says. surprised like, that she has no din- ner on, only herself and MT. Meeker. she meant four chops.
 'No,' she said in that frozen voice that ladies use in place of handing you one with their fist, I mean exact ly what I said-four pounds!' So I sent her four pounds of lamb chops with a bill for $1.60. And after they had lived on chops till they hated the sight of them and her poodle and the neighbor's cat had died from overeat ing lamb, she had a deep ingrowing dislike for me and never came near this place again. Her mother told me she said I forced my opinions on a customer and she couldn't endure it
 T had a terrible time with the last bride who moved into them Honey moon flatsi She traded here a week ana then came m With nre Tn her eye. She said she had heard of dishonest tradesmen. but she never expected 1t of me. Then she produced a list and read off of it that I had charged her Monday for a pound and a half of chops and she'd weighed the meat on her scales and 1t was just a pound. And she was charged for three pound chicken and 1t weighed two and a quarter. And her roast was a pound and a half shy and what did I mean by 1t?