The Palatka news and advertiser., 1916-02-04
The Professor S
Experiment
= BY NJ. QUAD
Copyright. 1915. by the Mcclure
Newspaper Syndicate.

Professor Brixton Longbody was a
born philosopher and logician. At
fifteen years old he had read more phi
losophy than forty average men com
bined.
At the age Of twenty-five young
Longbody was appointed professor of
logic and philosophy at state univer-
sity.
One afternoon the professor was
crossing the campus when he picked
up book that some one had dropped
or thrown away. 1t was entitled ''The
Life of vidocq.' Never in all his
days had he read criminal or de.
tective story. He had never let his pro-
found mind dwell for three seconds on
such literature. Behold, the time had
come! That night he sat up until past
midnight reading that book. 1t was a
new revelation to him, a new world of
thought.
He analysed vidocq's logic and phi
losophy and found fault with them.
He counted up the number of blum
ders that the average criminal made in
a case and was amazed that the fellow
had not been overhauled in half day.
After reading the book twice over he
laid it aside with sigh Of:
Dear me. what pack of idiots!
And how easy to have been sensible!
AS detective would have made a
great success. AS a criminal l fear
that l should have been more success.
full"
Do what he would, Professor Long.
body could not drive away these
thoughts. In a couple of weeks, as he
walked out, he imagined himself either
criminal or detective. Sometimes
he was ashamed and indignant at him
self, and at other times he was rather
pleased. In passing down a certain
street the professor noticed that par.
lor window in certain house was
half raised. A night or two later he
passed the same house an hour before
midnight and noticed that the same
window was still up.
Careless people-very careless" he
whispered to himself. THAT'S plain
invitation for robber to enter and
plunder the house."
1t made him angry with the owner of
the place. Was it his duty to teach
the man lesson? Would you believe
that the great philosopher argued that
it was?
The professor would enter that house
by night. By the open window? No,
sir; he was too sharp for that. That
would be the road Of the common Grim
inal. and it would be a fearful blunder.
The owner of the house was inviting a
would be robber to climb in that win
dow to get caught in a bear trap or
lose his life by spring gun.
The professor bought dark lantern,
He put few tools in his pockets and
set out one night to commit philoso-
phical and logical burglary. He was
expected at the front. Therefore he
appeared at the back and attacked
what he Judged was the pantry win.
dow.
Professor Longbody went into that
window like monkey. He was not
mistaken about its being the pantry.
The door leading into the dining room
was shut. and 1t was time for that
dark lantern. 1t was f1ashed-that Is,
there was no fash. A dark lantern had
been bought all right. but the profes
sor had not bought any oil to fill it, He
must hunt for matches in strange
house at midnight He had forgotten
to post himself as to whether The
house was lighted by electricity. gas
or lamps. but he softly opened the door
and found himself in room almost as
dark. Where was the match safe, if
there was one? In the kitchen proba
bly,. He went feeling his way for
about ten feet. Then he bumped up
against a table and involuntarily put
out his hands. and they struck pile of
dishes and tumbled them to the floor
The professor crouched on the floor
and waited with beating heart. and
he had only few seconds to wait
The room was suddenly flooded with
an electric light. and man came run
ming downstairs. revolver in hand
No move was made to get away On
the contrary. the teacher of philosophy
and logic got to bis feet and sat down
on chair.
"Well?" queried the man with the
gun as he sat down on another.
rs it of any use to say anythingY
replied Professor Longbody.
"Oh, yes" replied the householder.
you see. know you. You teach phi
osophy and logic at the school, but
you don't practice what you teach"
II was making an experiment" was
he rather weak reply.
"Yes; have expected you since you
irst saw that open window. l hap
)ened to be watching you that day.
You had convinced yourself that you
we're smarter than the smartest crimi-
lal."
"Y-e-s."