davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1916-01-08

: money ne s got or where he lives. To
81 @e IN truth, IN only rason there
ar re more poor brave men thin rich
Is because there ARE more poor.
An ivry man is about as brave as
( m next on'y wan fellow knows how
I don't
DO I think wen liver 90 to war?
Wen II ask ye this Supposin- it's
wan o'clock in tn mornir' ans IN
moon is behind a cloud. an tn polls
force has been disbanded. an a fat
man comes down TIL sthreet, with a.
dimOn shtud flashin' in his shirt front
an goold cable stretched across his
white vest.
An suppose he's drunk an happy
an onWatchful. An suppose hes lood-
ed down with money an it's stickin'
Out " livery pocket, and suppose tn
money was Wanst ye'ers an that he'd
skinned We out iv it whfn We were
IN throuble- Get the pitcher in ye'er
mind-dark Sthreet. wan o'clock in tn
mornin, vulgar display iv i'll gotten
gains be fat drunk No polls, no
pathrol wagon, no poliscourt in tn
morn1n,- An We with no assets but a
A caliber revolver
What would happen I know We
fir a peaceable. law abidin' citizen with
a taste fir music and dhraught beer.
out know what ye'd do Tn cannon
Wud be in tn middle " tn pee-kay
vest in a sicOnd. an ye'd be sayin' in
a hoarse whisper. I demand an outlet
fir me sOcyal aspirations or as a less
polite highwayman wud say. Come
acrost Wid tn stuff or I'll croak We
fis. sir, that's tn way itH be with us
whin IN Eu-ropeen war is over. Well
have all tn money in tn wurrld- Ye
wont have II. an I won't, but it'll be
here Just tn same. an somebody's goin'
70 come afther it., We can bet on that"
Wen be ready fir thin" said Mr..
Hennessy stoutly-
w coorse we will said Mr. Dooley
No wan questions that We're a great
people great war like people livery
body knows we're tn most sagacious.
tn bravest. tn most injeenyous. an
tn most far sighted people on tn face
" tn globe an tn most practical Who
cud land on these sacred shores saws
William Jennings Bryan
Why. frinds at a minyit-s notice
a thOusan battleships wud heave upon
tn blue wathers iv III ovean tin
thousan submarines wud duck undher I
tn waves, milyons " men. ARMED /
with rapid fire guns. wud march TO hurI /
Trim our coasts tn audacious invader ,
'Hinnissy. il fate should be hard /
with that illusthrees wan an he should /
get frog in his throat. he can make (
a line Twin as a conjurer. I've seen !
thin all frim Hermann to Hoodini. an J.
William Jennings is til ony artist ] 4
iver see that can pull battieships an !
armies out " a sthovepipe hat
fis- we're a great practical bust /
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1916-01-08

NJ the world have resulted from ,oI
4 = the attentive observation Of lit
tie things.
The art Of printing owes its origin
TO rude Impressions for the amusement
Of children, from letters carved on
,be bark OF a beach tres
The stupendous results OF the steam
engine may all be attributed to ar
individual observing steam issuing
from a bottle just emptied and placed
casually close 10 a fire He plunged
the bottles neck into cold water and
was intelligent enough 10 notice the
instantaneous rush which ensued from
this simple condensing apparatus.
Calico heard that the children OF
Dutch spectacle maker, BY placing
several pairs OF s9ectacles before each
other, looked through them at a dis
tsnt object; the glimpse thus afforded
led to the invention OF the telescope
Sea wood floating past Columbus's
ships enabled him to qusn The mutiny.
which arose among his sailors al not
discovering land It was a trifle, but
the trifle gave him hope that The
eagerly sought for new world was not
First Congress in Livery Stable.
The Continental congress had its
meeting in a livery stable Its mem
bers wore knee brooches ana silk
stockings and with handkerchiefs in
hand they were diligently employed
IN lashing the flies from their legs
flies arouse the sufferers il fastened
II ii did not aid. in inducing them
promptly to sign the immortal docu-
ment which gave birth 70 this empire
Gen. Grant tells the story in his
memoirs how his mother sent him to
= neiEhbor's house in Georgetown.
Ohio, 10 get some butter There he
heard a letter read as to a possible
vacancy at West Point. When he told
his mother what he had heard, she in
Hamer and ask to be given a chance
for the vacancy. Gen. Hamer had not
thea heard that his appointee had
failed 10 pass the examination and so
TO rid himself easily Of the persistent
boy Gen Manner said. IF there is q
vacancy you shall have the first
chance" The way opened for Grant
10 obtain the military education which
made him so useful in the crisis Of his
country Grant declared that he be
came general and president Of the
United States because his family that
day happened to run out Of butter.
Anvil Suggests Masterpiece.
One Of Handels matchless harmonies
was suggested TO him by hearing the
sound from a blacksmitb's anvil
To be scrupulous about little things
may be thought indicative OF a narrow
mind and petty spirit. yet from the
careful attention to little things men
have made their greatest achieve
ments- Little things accumulate into
character and determined destiny.
Little things, little courtesies, little
Einonesses, genial smiles, the encour-
aging word. the friendly letter-these
little things indicate the character.
Wordsworth chara cterizes the little"
nameIess. unremembered acts Of kind
ness and OF love as the best portion
Of a good mans lfe-"
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1916-01-08

I and earring excess baggage. Twenty
times James shifted the valise to the
otner hand, twenty times he let il
! drop and sat upon it.
And then, as again he took up his
burden, the good Samaritan drew near
IN a low gray racing-car at the rate
OF forty miles an hour, and within
a hundred feet Of Jimmie suddenly
stopped and backed toward him. The
good samaritan was young man with
white hair. He wore a suit of blue,
golf cap; the hands that held the
wheel were disguised in large yellow
and surveyed the dripping figure in
the road with tired and uncurious
eyes.
You a Boy Scout?- he asked.
With alacrity for the twelty-first
time Jimmie dropped the vadse, forced
his cramRed fingers into straight lines.
and saluted.
The yourn man in the car nodded
toward the seat beside him.
Get in" he commanded.
When James sat painting happily
at his elbow the old young man. to
Jtmmie's disappointment. did not con-
unue TO shatter the speed limit. In
stead. he seemed inclined for CONVEX
sation, and the car growing indig-
nantly, crawled.
I never saw a Boy Scout before"
announced the old young man. Tell
me about it. First. tell me what you
90 Wnen you re not scouting.
Jimmie explained vOlubly. When not
in uniform he was an office boy. and
from peddlers and beggars guarded
the gates of Carroll and Hastings.
stock brokers. He spoke the names
Of his employers with awe It was
a firm distinguished. conservative.
and long established. The white
haired young man seemed to nod in
assent.
DO you know them" demanded
Jimmie suspiciousdy. Are YOU Gus
toner of oure"
- know them said the young man.
Ihey are customers Of mine"
Jimmie wondered in what way Car
roll and Hastings were customers OF
the white haired young man. Judging
MIN by his outer garments, Jimmie
guessed he was a Fifth Avenue tailor;
ne might be even a haberdasher. JIM
ME continued He lived. he explained,
with his mother at One Hundred and
Forty sixth Street; Sadie. his sister,
attended the public school: he helped
support them both, and he now was
about to enjoy well-earned vacation
camping out on Hunters Island, where
ne would cook his own meals, and,
Continued on page threeJ
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1916-01-08
By ELLA MnEELER wuCOy-

7 HAVE met many people who did
not talk OF their beliefs. / have
met fanatics, and cranks even
who were silent regarding their ideas
until asked 10 talk.
But never met an atheist or an
infidel who was not voluble and ag-
gressive in argument. and insistent
( upon talking on the subject Of re-
iision-
Thousands Of believers in various
creeds are contented to permit their
fellow men other faiths. or no faith
at all, thinking it is personal matter
between the individual and his Creator.
The atheist. however. is violently
opposed to allowing any man a faith
in a Divine power or a hope of i'm
mortal life. He will shout himself
hoarse and black in the face in the
effort to take away the comforting
belief OF a devout soul
I think any creed which teaches that
the Overruling Mind OF this universe
is cruel and petty in its treatment of
the beings IL has created should be
destroyed. because such a creed makes
human beings cruel and petty toward
one another.
Made the First UnbeIIevers.
Il was the preaching OF the horrible
old hell-fire doctrines of an ignorant
age which made the first infidels and
unbelievers- Because intelligent and
just minds refused TO accept the doc
trine OF infant damnation and the fall
through Adam they were called
atheists. They preferred that title TO
being classed among the believers in
such a cruel God.
But we have in the land TODAY a
more violent and aggressive class of
arheists-men who become abusive
toward any one who expresses any
any faith in the continuance OF life
beyond the grave. no matter how
broad may be the creed OF that one
Any man who in his own mind har-
bors a creed which condemns his fell
low men to damnation for not believ-
ing as he does needs 10 be educated
out OF il, since he is adding to the
misery Of the world by his thoughts
and helping to keep humanity in chains
Of ignorance.
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1916-01-08

perts anything but TO have thin go to
Nashin' ton, ate lunch an thin. while
-waitin' fir tn three-fiffty-five have
thin think iv wonderful marvellous
practical things 10 do that III Euro
peen experts has niver imagined.
He wanted 10 get Jules Verne too.
but that great expert is no more
Howiver, the department always has
the help Nv h.innery Ford Hinnery is
van Of the greatest invinters- What
did he invinL' say ye2 He invinted a
way iv gettin' forty milf6n dollars
out " maxim a tin wagon. He is the
rlcheSt living rinsmith. an livery time
ne turns out new kettle he gets an
other idee fr runnin tn universe
His present scheme Is a midget sub
marine that can be dropped into tn
wather where IL will nose around ontfI
it finds an inimys battle-ship which
II Will desthroy- If he sells enough
az these deepsea dwarfs TO tn gov
eminent he viii return two dollars
apiece at the end Of the war.
50 We see tn year-aud-a-half that
has passed since tn war broke our
has not been spint in vain be tn most
practical an INGENIOUS people in tn
wurrld We ar-re ready TT amy Zoe
in our own weight Hayti we defy ye
Ninizuala do ye'er worst
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1916-01-08

gratitude he hurriedly advised Sadie
TO take in THE Curse of Cain rather
than The Mohawk's Last Stand and
fled down the front steps
He wore his khaki uniform. q, his
shoulders was his knapsack. from Ms
hands swung his suitcase, and between
his heavy stockings and his asbortsa
his kneecaps unkissed by the sun as
yet unscathed by blackberry vines
showed as white and fragile as the
wrists Of girl As he moved toward
the L" station at the corner. Sadie
and his mother waved to him: in the
street boys too small to be Scouts
hailed him obviously; even the police
man glancing over the newspapers on
the newsstand nodded approval
You a Scout JimlnieT" he asked
No retorted Jimmie for was not
he also in uniform I'm Santa Claus
out filling Christmas stockings"
The policeman also possessed i ready
Then get yourself a pair" he adj
vised. II a dog was to see your
legs
Jimmie escaped the insult by fleeing
up the steps of the Elevated
An hour later. with his valise in
one hand and staff in the other. he
wa tramping up the Boston Post Road
and breathing heavily The day was
cruelty hot Before his eyes. over an
interminable stretch Of asphalt, the
heat waves danced and flickered. Al
ready the knapsack on his shoulders
pressed upon him like an Old Man OF
the Sea: the linen in the valise had
turned TO pig iron. mis- pipe-stem legs
were webbing. his eyes smarted with
salt water sweat and the fingers sup
porting the valise belonged to some
other boy and were giving that boy
much pain. But as the motor cars
flashed past with raucous warnings.
or. that those who rode might better
see the boy with bare knees. passed az
"half speed" Jimmie stiffened his
shoulders and stepped jauntily forward.
Even when the joy riders Knocked with
oh. you ScOutr he smiled al them. He
was willing to admit to those who
rode that the laugh was on the one
who walked And he regretted-oh
so bitterly-havinS left the train. He
was indignant that for his "one good
turn a day" he had not selected one
less strenuous-that. for instance. he
had not assisted a frightened old lady
through the traffic. To refuse the
dime she might have offered, as ali
true scouts refuse all tips. would have
been easier than TO earn it by walking
five miles, with the sun at 80 degrees,
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1916-01-08

Have We butler. groom, shower.
samekeeper, plumber. furnace man. or
oarunder wurrkin' Ter ye who ought 10
De Wurrkin' fr tn country?
Have ye man hurlin' tn hash At
ye VINO ought to be hurlin' bombs at
Have We a man removin' ashes WIN
ought 20 be removin' tn Kaiser2
Have ye a man Shawn We that
ought 10 be sth)avin' tn count6rvs'
CThis is only an English Joke to
hyen up the poster. HinnisyD
II We have, we're a rabbit
GaWd save Josephus Daniels
Iheres wan English poster that I
liked better then tn others. 1t is DO
you may sind another man to fight fur
King an eounthry?" On'y 1 think thew
put the emphasis on tn wrong wurrd.
1t ought to be on another II we
paste up this poster it may Iade to
Two frinds viii meet in the sthreet
zach " them shouts Co at tn other.
1 said it furst' Yer did not I hol-
Tered before ye opened yer mouth
Iheres long argument an they ex-
ehange white feathers an part. It viii
become as gr-reat a game as hf-spv
Won't We enjy skippins up behind
man an whin he's off his guard yellin'
GO at him. I don't know what I'm
goin' TO do about me servants. but /
suppose I'll have TO sacrifice tn game
keeper an tn butler. though they're
been with tn family since tn DAYS iv
tn old earl Watkins has been very
careless. He let tn goat out iv the
wood shed last week, an ye know how
Alonzo always sarves tn cabbage cold"
e ought to be ashamed iV yersilf
TO be talkin' about these Ia-ads that
way. said Hennessy. It don't care
If they are joOds- They'll be all right
Whin tn time comes"
Sure they Will" said Mr. Dooley.
1t was on'y me jokin habit Divil
tn step wud I take to put me fut out
at this time in tn way " any man
larnin' TO be a sojer aven II he didn't
want to be a gin'erl 10 sthart with.
I've been Twin in this war zone west
" Halstead sthreet fir nanny years.
an I've got to be like tn war horse
in tn Good Book.
I sniff tn battle frim afar. an Z
whin it comes I won't bother about /
tn seeyal stsndin' of any young Teller
that keeps me frim being sl1ivered on /
A bayonet or filled full iv green and I
yellow gas. I'll not ask how much /
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1916-01-08
"Our coast defenc

waves with hand iv iron. inst tn
same - he did the great newspaper in
North Carolina, where he learned tn
prO-fissyOn iv armies.
I can see this Farragut in his cabin
dashed TO his desk. in full uniform.
with sleeve protectors on his arms an
a sthraw hat on his head. an a corn
cob pipe in his mouth He finishes an
oroher with III flourish iv his pen. an
in raspin' voice iv wan born to COM
mand cries, Copy. a copy boy in full
admirals UNIFORM dashes in an dashes
out again In half an hour the sthreets
resOund with tn cries il Special ex-
thry. All about what secretly Daniels
is gOin' 20 do Windows ARE raised.
men in their night clothes rush 10 tn
dures to get the latest news frim tn
cane bOttOmed seat iv war iv tn armie
iditer's sanctum-
They learn that Josephus IS about
to take decided step an intinds TO
appiQt a comfy to considher new an
daZzhn' ways in defendin' III coun-
thry- He amt seekin' fir publicity
He don't pick out weu known men that
tn papers wud print their pitchers.
No sir, TIL first two names he ST.
lected was Tomas A. Edison an Nikola
Tesla tn idee is not to pay these ex-
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1916-01-08
4 Serial Of Everyday Life
Their Married Life
Helen Makes A Call and Talks About Children

st DO WISH 1 could stay at home
today, although I want to see
Mrs Kinsley so much.
thought Helen to herself as she looked
through the curtains of her living room
down to the rivers of slush and
wretchedness in the street below.
She had promised to go 10 Brooklyn
for lunch that day. She had postponed
the date from earlier in the week be-
cause warren had wanted her 10 meet
MIN, and. bad as the weather was, she
could not postpone the luncheon again
mrs. kinsley lived in a dear little
coy home She had three children,
Nho aaored her, and Helen had met
her when she had been crossing the
continent last year Quite q friend
snip had sprung up between them, and
MrS- kinsleys who was younger than
Helen. delighted TO ask her advice
about thousands OF little trivial house
hold matters concerning which Helen
was twice as ignorant as she cared
10 admit
Whenever they met. whether IL was
in New York for tea or out in Brook
lyn, or very occasionally at Helen's
own apartment, they always talked
household affairs. There were few
soul to their homes as did little Mrs
kinsley, to whom her husband and her
babies meant more than the whole
world put together.
Helen bundled herself into a rain
coat, pulled a little beaver hat down
over her hair which had Just been
curled. and sailed out into the rain.
The snow which had fallen had left
the sidewalks in a terrible condition
Ice streWed the curbstones and the
steps Of the subway, and every one
walked gingerly lest he be taken I'M
aEares-
I really didn't believe you would
come" said Mrs. Kinsley. running out
Of the house to meet her regardless of
the rain which was dripping from the
roof all over her fresh shirtwaist
Get in out of the rain" said Helen,
closing her umbrella and giving her a
playful push. Don't tell me that / am
not particularly fond Of you, coming
over to this terrible place on a day like
this"
She Is Cordially welcomed.
1 don't know, are yOug You post
poned the date till today. you know
last Tuesday was wonderful
Why" said Helen. holding up her
hands in mock horror, I thought com
mutiag from Jersey was dreadful, but
don't mind me. dear. I am cross be-
cause I am wet III be all right as
soon as ] get acclimated. Hello. Helen
Junior" to the little flaxen haired girl
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1916-01-08
Chinese Bandits Carrying
japanese Guns Are Menace
To Country around Peki1

Pekin. China Jan s-Bandits have
become so active in Inner Mongolia and
have been so successful in resisting the
Chinese army, that the government now
refuses to issue passports for Inner
Mongolia and for much Of china proper
lying near the Monaghan border. Many
robberies have been committed near
Kalgan and Dolon-nor Kalgan is less
than 100 miles northwest OF Pekin.
while Dolon-nOr is about $50 miles
north OF the Chinese capital
Travellers returning from the troubled
section all say that the bandits are IN
usually well provided with modern arms
and ammunition. Many OF the rifles
used BY the outlaws are Of Japanese
manufacture and practically new
Chinese newspapers and many Chi
nese officials charge the Japanese with
promoting the Mongolian disturbances
IN support Of their opposition to the
monarchfcal movement
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1916-01-08

A., who stood in the hall looking at her
! school"
4 kept her home today explained
I the mother. Come up to my room.
and take off those wet things. then
a minute"
Helen followed Mrs. KinsIev upstairs
where she was quickly Invested of her
wet garments. The room was warm
and coy, and she sat in the bow
WINDOW humming little song while
Mrs kinsley, who kept no maid went
downstairs 10 see about lunch She
was glad that she had come. There
was something appealingly honey
about this place Perhaps il was the
evidence Of children, but still il hardly
seemed that. Didn't she herself have
a baby2
A broken doll was lying on the win
dow seat She wondered If Wfnifreo
had any broken dolls. Somehow Whit
like other children. But she was a
darling. and Helen was so glad that
she still believed in all the dear iIiu-
sions of childhood. What were M
about2
Helen Junior came in and in her
baby way began to entertain Helen
with an account Of letter
Luncheon" called Mrs. KinsIev
from downstairs Bring Helen Junior
with you. will you, Helen2 Someone's
1 never can get ner down to meals"
Helen enjoyed the luncheon and in
sisted that she was ravenous. She
helped carry out the dishes and nile
them on the table to be washed and
pronounced the baked fish delicious
Adterward they adjourned to the
living room and talked gossip" as
Mrs. Kinsley termed it.
You know such lots Of clever neo-
pie she sighed Wistfully. where
did you meet so many interesting peo-
pie who do thingS2~
Just luck. 1 guess. j met 4 great
many through Frances Knowles. Won
know"
"Oh, yes She is writing .Nimrod' in
the Scroll 1 have read several chan
tiers OF II and think it is splendid.
hate 10 spend so much for a ma eaZfne
though, would rather put the money
into paint boxes for the Children
Y cure dear" said Helen impuI-
siYely, and she stifled a sigh as she
spoke. She wondered if Mrs. Kinsley
DID not get more out Of life than she
did, IN spite of the fact that Mrs. Kins-
ley rarely had half the time thai she.
Helen, did for herself
me two women kept up A converse
ton about trivial home things for an
hour or more When Helen finally
El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1916-01-08

LclltcSS1 asked EraNelE.
No" said Mr.. Dooley, 4 can't dance.
Besides Iarned to dig a trench whin
l first enlisted in III Eu-ropeen army
" occupation nanny years ago. an
me hand hasn't lost its cunning Bur
II war breaks out with any country.
I'll do me share I'll 20 over and lick
Schwartzmeister.
In me younger days whin knight
hood was in flower ten Germans was
considered to be tn akel Of wan iv the
Supeeryor race, an, man niVer
thought " boastin' about victory over
wan " them no more thin Jess Will
lard would put TIL number iv times
ne Skipped the rope or punched tn
bag into his record.
They were willin' enough. mind YER.
but their culture wasn't tn akel "
ours They rushed in with their ewes
shut and their fists whirlin' in front
" their faces. tn gallant numbskulls.
an, poke or maybe kick in tn
midst iv them. ended tn campaign
Nv coorse. Hinnissy," Mr. Doolev
went on, these army trainin' camps
Is only the beginnin' " the great
army that's goin' to bate the wurrld.
These men will all be officers with
soords or walkin' sthicks. Thev cud
win be thimselves. iv coorse. But tits
IN oplnyn " siveral military experts
that 1t may be proOdent to raise an
army to help thin.
Now that we've stharted to increase
our military Strenth be tn scientific
methods proper TO a practical business
Ike. people. maybe well follow tn ex-
ample Nv our British frinds acrost tn
seas and put up posters to lure tn
volunteers I've been readin' some Nv
these four sheets, an they're very in
ticin'
Some mornin' yen come out Nv tn
house with ye're dinner pail on ye're
arm an see a poster on tn fence like
wan was realm tn other day frim
London, only changed to suit Ameri-
can idees-
Questions TO those who employ
male servants.