The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1916-03-18
Slants
By "Zeke''
By "Zeke"

The title of dictator of the iron
and steel industry of the United
States is something of title to carry
around even if it is bestowed by
grand jury Indictment.
Every day you read about some fell
low who was too slick to get caught,
and invariably the notice states that
he is on his way to the pen or that
ne is delinquent in his alimony.
Tradition gives to women the last
word" Taking as a criterion the re-
cent diplomatic negotiations between
the United States and Germany, which
are conducted entirely by men, 1t
would seem that the custom may have
been solidly founded
1t is hard to understand how Cen
eFal Villa could have the heart to in
wade the United States in such a bold
manner and without precedent. II the
rural carriers can find him he should
most certainly be handed note of the
most formal nature.
We go the story of the man who
picked up a five out of a bird nest
one better We once saw a doctor
pick twenty-five out of one. The kid
who was after he eggs fell out of the
tree and broke an arm.
Speaking of international compli-
cations; how about the beating up of
an American in Berlin, Ontario.
In small towns there are two games
which are in the nature of continuous
performances. One is called Bring
ing the men to their senses and the
other is called Bringing the women
to their senses
To date the results of the finals
have never been published.
From the space that is given to the
alleged supertalkativeness of the tom
serial profession you will be surprised
to learn that Topeka's deaf mute bar
Der runs a very modest shop In the
suburbs and not the biggest one in
town.
Probably the decline in archery as
an outdoor sport may be partially ex-
planned by the fact that devotee is
called a Toxophiiite.
If you wonder how we learned that
it is easily explained In answering
the telephone we knocked the diction-
airy off the desk and it opened at that
place.
The second stage of the prelimi-
naries to the big fight" has been
reached. The ex-champs are compar-
ing the present title contenders with
the old guard.
woman can work up as much ex-
citement over a new dress pattern as
a man can over a new scheme for
making money without working.
Head line in the paper-U. S. Be
HIND ARMY-Too far behind, say
we, much too far.
Probably as easy a way as any to
get even with an airship thief is to
let him get all of it.
The general opinion seems to be
that castor oil is the hardest stuff to
swallow, but how about putting down
a perfectly good ten dollar bill just
to keep the cops from getting it.
! The standard method of showing
| the mere shell of what was once a
| gentleman in the movies is to pOr-
| tray the old shell reloading itself with
something out of a dark green bottle.
Teddy has at last outlined definitely
his position as to the presidential NOM
ination by both denying and affirming
his candidacy in one week.
A wagon load of six hundred quarts
of nitro glycerin exploded near Tulsa,
| Okla, the Otnef DAY. Inc only re-
markable thing about this is that lat
er they found small piece of the
] driver.
AS entertainment we place the
| piano recital by two and a half year
old child in the same file with the ed
ucated seals.
One of the most popular ways of
getting your name into the paper is to
locate a relative that you have not
heard from for twenty years. If he
has grown rich in the meantime it
makes better reading.
We have tried to keep out of poll
| tics this week but cannot help but
think that the opposition that has
shown itself against Dave Mulvane
| comes from the boys who are trying
to kid themselves into believing that
| the old wounds are healed and the Ole
scars forgotten.
The newest game in Europe seems
to be one called sighting the kaiser's
fleet" So far that's all that has been
done to it.