The Lakeland evening telegram. (Lakeland, Fla.) 1911-1922, 1916-01-19
Not Exactly a
Proposal
Copyright, 1917. by Associated Literary
preaal
BY John Philip Orth

olOuS anu SnOOt crow.
And as this IL leap year you may
get a proposal!"
"And it's almost time for rhubarb
pie"
And baby has got over the measles.
and won't annoy you"
And the flowers and leeks and man
brakes are coming up in the woods
And perhaps you can shoot . wood
pecker and blue-jay."
Mrs. Gather, living down in the coun-
try. wanted to get her brother Bob
Taylor away from the life insurance
Office for few days rest, and the
above are sample inducements con-
tanned in her letter.
Bob got away and appeared with a
clean shirt and a shotgun warranted to
kill any old crow at distance of halt
a mile. He was told to ''just loaf" and
he proceeded to do so. When he ha.
loafed a couple of days, and as he
smoked his pipe on the veranda, the
sister asked:
Don't you hear it,"
"The pig grunting?-yes."
mo, sir mean that internal old
crow cawing and shrieking. He has
kept 1t up for months, and I want him
killed"
"A crow" replied Bob, as he leaned
back and pulled at his pipe. lis q work
of Nature"
$50 are you"
"Then comes the question, have l
right to destroy him? AS l take it, the
worst thing about him Is his voice.
That, my dear sister. can be said Of
three-fifths Of humanity. We may be
just as much of a nuisance to that old
crow as he Is to us. l don't think l
want to shoot him. I am in the life
insurance business, you know, and it
is our duty to prolong life. If the
crow must be killed let it be by your
own hand. Some bread soaked In
poisoned water will do the trick"
81 have tried that and other things
in vain. If you have become a crow
champion at least go out and give him
warning to 60 far and never return"
Brother Bob knocked the ashes from
his pipe and shouldered his gun and
set forth The old crow gave him
every chance to fire a fatal shot, but
when II came it was miss by many
feet, and the man gave II up with the
one shot and proceeded to stroll
through the woods. BY and by he
reached q mass of rocks piled in con-
fusion along the banks of brook, and
there he sat down for more loafing
and smoking. He was listening to the
babble of the water he could not see
and watching the squirrels In the
beeches, when he heard the voices Of
girls approaching.
A life insurance man must study
voices as we'll as statistics. Mr.. Bob
Taylor wasn't two minutes deciding
that the voices belonged to two good
looking girls about twenty years old
each and that they were making for
spot below him The owner of one
voice would have golden hair and the
other dark chestnut. Both would be
good insurance risks. He heard them
cross the brawling stream on log,
and he knew when they took seat
on fiat rock 20 feet below him. By
parting the bushes at his elbow he
could have gotten fair sight of both.
but he didn't do this He didn't quite
think 1t his duty to stand up and an
| nounce: ooh, girls, ! am here and
you'd better move on" but he didn't
fvxNl - NaA- ~ IL ,<x1a orI f1AN
said.
well you've seen him, at dis
| lance. anyhow, and what do you think
of him."
about twenty-four years old?"
yep"
Good looking?"
"Yep."
Good figure?"
Fine"
Thinks we'll of himself?"
"All young men do that, papa says"
| Probably engaged to some girl in
town"
Probably, and she thinks he's just
the loveliest thing out"
mo chance for either of us?"
None for you, my dear, but as for
me"
+, Sue Moreton, what do you meant"
was exclaimed.
you are too scared to take chance,
but I'm going to propose to him. It's
leap year, you know. Yes, ma'am. I'm
going to ask for his hand and heart"
There We're merry peals of laughter,
and then the question was asked:
"How are you going to get an intro
| duction? That must come first, you
know Tou can't walk up to him on
the highway and ask him to be yours.
ooh. Romance will bring II about
| somehow. Yes, sir, If that young man
| remains here for a week longer he
will be mine, OF ! shall be a Tilted
maiden"
you are just in fun"
Watch me and see. No use of hav-
ing leap year If our sex doesn't take
/ advantage of it. Let's go home now.
I'm in a hurry to plan my campaign
/ and be engaged"
! Bob Taylor heard every word of the
I conversation, and he wasn't bit con-
/ science-stricken, either He had taken
! chances of hearing himself criticized
/ instead of praised He had noticed
! leap year on the calendar. and had
read newspaper squibs about 1t, but
until this hour he had given no par
4 ticular thought to It. II was the girl
with the golden hair that was going
to propose to him. He had not seen
her, but some sort of instinct made
him sure of this. They were wrong in
saying that he had a girl in the city.