The Ekalaka eagle. [volume] (Ekalaka, Mont.) 1909-1920, 1916-12-08
How Foot and
Mouth Disease
Had Its Start?
The "N1r. Dooley'' of Montana
Has an Original Explanation,
Which Should Appeal to DevO-
tees of Miss Nicotine; Good of
the Corrupt Practices Act.

chewing tobacco that could have been
left there by no one but A. M. (Early
Morning) Anderson, Off the top step,
"yis, sor, it was u gr-r-reat day for
this glorious country av ours whin
the c'rupt practisin' statoot Wint II
effect an put tn campaign cigar UNI
der tn ban. Oive seen tn day, week
afther ELECTION, WEI thirteen bushel
baskits wouldn't hold tn stumps that
KEN out av tn historic halls av this
imposin' eddifuss. Since tn assplr-
unit for offuss has been obliged t
Stay Thin he suspecks av bein' for
his rival with some less deadly Wep-
on thin tn campaign cigar, a bushel
or two av stumps is all | git, even
with le%gislachure comm an tn lame
ducks gallopin' up an down tn stairs
from mornin' till night, chasin' tn
governor fer a job. Blessed be tn
mon who envinted the c'rupt practis-
in ack fer he shud be rights be the
Patron Saint av Capitol House jani-
thOrs.
"Yis, sor," the Head Janitor con-
tinued, as he made a dash with dust
pan and broom for the swing door,
where Seth Maxwell, the versatile
commissioner of publicity, had just
dropped the butt Of a Dukes Cameo,
'yis, sor," turning suddenly in his
tracks to give Maxwell, who just then
appeared at his window, a look that
would turn limburger green, "yis,
sor, if cigar stoomps N cigaretty
butties an guilds ave foine-cutt or
Harsheshoe plug or Climax or Star
Chewin' cu'd talk, w'ot a lot av tales
they could tell. Fer his butts or his
quid, moine We, is usually all a man
takes Wen he disappears behoind
some av these oak doors in there, fer
a chat with tn powers that be. Faith!
win we've swept up mountains av
'em, as Oh hove, yell see charakter
in butts. / moind IRE Dick p. Sutton
av Butte cloimbed these steps wan
day. Dick, dye know, is a thayatri-
cal king, a movin' pickshure maggot.
and all koinds av an OF Teller. They
call i'm TIL Man Behoind tn Stogie'
because he's niver without a pound
or more av tn weed in his face, made
up in the forum av a stogie about
nome feet long.
When Dick Sutton Came.
"Dick p. was wit a newspaper
man, whose name OF cannot raycall,
but whom Oh r%aymimber as tn only
raypother in Montana who niver had
DePI HllllSl ultu lOI COHlllllooH ACl a'
publicity. This rayporther an another
Teller, who niver paid his debts, had
come over firm Butte with Dick P.
to see a jynt commity av tn house
am sinate raygardin' a law author
lin Sunday shows in Missoula,
witch, as all the wurruld knows,
thinks movies av girruls wrigglin' in
nawthin' a-tall is all roight six days
in tn week but ShaWkin' bad forum
av a Sunday.
"Dick p. passed in, wit tn stogie
in his face-although how he got
t'ru tn swingin' doors wit it ray
names a mystery to me, t this day
and sasshayed grand]y down tn
corridor to tn commity room, puffin'
away like a small tug pullin' a first
class battleship aft a sandbar. Byme-
by, me Telephone rings. It's tn
gov'ner:
"'Moike!' SEE tn gov'ner-an' it's
the on'y tonne Oh ever knew i'm to
be cross-'Moike, Ter tn love av
Satan who t'rew th0t rubber int tn
furnace?'
81 luked out firm me windy an
the stately av Gin'ral Meagher was
chokin' bechune tn ears av his
harse!'
bulLS. COiltl uNtu IC AlNnd '"H
itor, dexterously tumbling a bushel
basket of them into his ncincerator
cart, Quits, is ut? Hist! Dye moind
tn fut and mouth disayse they talk
about. Olive me theory av how it
arridg'nated. Somebody dumped
a bushel av butts out av some state
house or hotel lobby or clubroom Or
some sim'ler place where tn harrud
workin' lawmaker spends sixteen or
seventeen av his leisure hours, iv'ry
day-sonlebody doomped tn butts
onto a city doomp where cows grazed.
After a butt or two in their cud, they
cud nayther stand on their fut nor
open their mouth. An there y'are!"
"What do you do with the sweep
ings?" asked the reporter.
"Hist!" he replied, with a twinkle
of the eye. "Me br1ther-in-law own
a chewing tobacco factory an nothin'
goes t. waste. An iv'ry tonne we
hear of an Anglo-maynic congriss-
man, we sind i'm a plug free, wit
our compliments!"
Montana Maid in Montana Made.
9TH campaign cigar" he unused,
sprinkling the top steps with a water
ing pot before going to it with a
huge broom, "has been a better boos-
ter fer tn unthertanin business thin
war ever was. I raymimber a guy
come here durin' tn sission av Nome
teen Hundred, peddlin' a cher-root he
call 'Th' Montana Maid 1t was
Montana made, he Explained; and he
limited that ligislathers who wantel
to stand roight wit Montana labor
wad do we'll to come t'ru wit tn
price av a box a piece.
Thin was the era win labor, un'