davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Omaha daily bee., 1916-03-24
Tipe on Home Topics

Washington Post: Eugenic coddling of
presidential booms may be the proper
thing. but Justice Hughes Topsy seems
to grow Of It's own accord.
Cleveland Plain Dealer: The zero in
human effort seems to be reached by
that Missouri professor who has written
a learned disquisition on the improba-
bility of war with Japan.
Brooklyn Eagle: The Omaha man who
files formal petition declaring that
Bryan is not a democrat and cannot be
voted for In democratic primaries, has
the courage OF his convictions. e
Boston Transcript: "who but proof
readers read the Commoner?" shifts
Harry Watterson. Does Marse Henry
subscribe to the theory that Florida villas
and Nebraska ranches and Texas onion
plantations grow on busiest
Louisville Courier-Journal: An exam
pie of adequate preparedness is the man
who sends his evening clothes to the
cleaner and tells him amy time next
week will do" because he knows his wife
will want him to take her to the party
tonight.
Buffalo Express: In establishing a CEN
sorship In accordance with the best ira
ditions of kaiserism and kultur the ad-
ministration is presumably actuated less
by fear OF the ignorant Mexicans than
of the intelligent Americans.
Philadelphia Ledger: When It comes to
what's what" in the administration
military measure. It's wise politician
who knows which bill is right and which
set of facts is the only simon-pure, cor
| rect version from the War department.
Indeed. It must require an agile-mlnded
secretary to keep up with the guessing
contest that does duty for the real thing
In congress these days.
Springfield Republican: The announce
ment Of the Union Pacific railroad that
its chair cars and coaches are TO be
| kept at temperature of seventy de-
grees day and night. raise sgain tbs
whole question OF car ventilation. which
has not been satisfactorily solved. par
ticularly in regard to sleeping cars. The
Union Pacific recognizes that too higt
temperature Is more injurious to tbs
health than lack OF fresh air. but IL
not seventy degrees too high for a cal
that is we'll filled with pSsesngers7 II
the modern steel coaches the air is offer
notIceably bad when a train Is not II
motion but the ventilation system 10 81
other respects fairly successful. II carr
were thoroughly aired out In the termi
nal yards before a train Is made up
passengers might derive some benefi
from the process. Fresh air Is also
good dIsinfectant.
Omaha daily bee., 1916-03-24
People and Events

George N, Howard OF Birmingham. Ala picked up
woman's handbag containing a photo. at the San
Francisco show last September. The merry archer
barbed George In soft spot at the time where
upon he chased the original OF the photo and found
her at Hudsonve Mich. Whist fonowed9 Oh, the
honeymoon.
At a fashionable dinner I'm Philadelphia one Of the
guests started the smokefest the tables were
cleared away and thereby started fire in the gown
OF a woman diner, who seriously burned as a re-
suit The old-fashioned regulation that gentlemen
should smoke in the presence OF women at social
reunions is back number in Philadelphia circles
Everyone OF the elghty-nine candles found a place
and blazed the birthday cake Of Mrs J. b. Greg
ory az lone. Calf Besides there were thirty four
members OF her family present representing five gem
eratiOns. Mrs. Gregory born at Springfield ILL.,
crossed the plains in Oxeart in 1883 and with her
husband settled land which became the townsite
OF lone.
Bids from banks for the city funds OF Cleveland
show much higher interest rate than prevails in
Omaha The funds are in two classes-active and
inactive. Ninteen bids received for the frat
and forty-three bids for the second The top offer
for active funds SSi per ana the inactive
funds ans per cent The offers cover a period of
three years. and lower than the terms obtained
In 1913
There Il drug store for every 1000 inhabitants IN
the United States and physician for every es7 N
habants according 20 directory census OF the drug
trade Just completed by the Pharmaceutical Era.
The Era finds that there ss6a retail druEpasts
located in 1881 cities and towns and Il also finds
that there 80 drug jobbing houses inoIud.
| ing twelve that by retail druggists on a
| cooperative plan
Omaha daily bee., 1916-03-24
Thirty Years Ago
This Day in Omaha
compllsa fEom D. RnsI.

The ice Is moving rapidly out Of the river ana
barring floating fragments. the water Is almost
tfely free this point The breakup here has been
tame indeed and the river. instead Of rising rap
idly. has fallen considerably
The Thurstons have decided 20 accept the chal.
ienEe OF the Fttzgerad hose team at Lincoln =
witness the posting OF 900 forfeit money by II. b,
kennedy TO whether the defy means bluff busI-
meas
AR. and Mrs E. /. Blerbower left on a trip to
Detroit
J. J. Hardin. city salesman fOr George A. HOas-
land. is back from twO-day hunt. IN which he cap
tursd 80 ducks
Dr. Pecks took fright he stepping
into the buggy and away. but captured near
Ninth and Douglas.
me Metropolitan club gave a Purm ball at its
hail. attended by about fifty couples.
The Omaha Dairy association ga North sixteenth
street. wants forty farmers TO furnish twenty-five
fifty pounds Of choice table butter per for the
highest market price. Contracts be made by
writing seeing c. B. Hutchinson. manager
J. B. Haynes would IKE 10 buy a secondhand
typewriter.
Eifth ward republicans endorsed Charles n che
ney candidate for ward councilman
Omaha daily bee., 1916-03-24
Editorial Snapshots

washington Post: one insoiuble rnys-
terry is why the impassioned Interpreters
OF successful married careers always
wind up in the divorce courts.
Boston Transcript: Woodrow Wilson
never vet did anything by halves Per-
mission for Carranza to invade the United
States was coupled with another order
for guns and cartridges.
Boston Transcript: Governor General
Harrison OF the Philippines has expressed
a desire. to retire on March 4. 1917. He
won't be the only democratic office
holder to march forth next year
Chicago Herald: Nebraskas secretary
OF state rules Mr. Bryan is a democrat
and may run for delegate to the national
convention. At that point Mr.. Bryan
will no doubt try to take up the ruling
himself
Boston Transcript: A ship laden with
Scotch whisky was held up by a torpedo
boat. but finally permitted 20 proceed.
Think OF what a moaning OF the bare
there would have been had II not put to
seal
indianapolis News; with a serious
menace Of a government arTnor plate
plant. the steel men are beginning to talk
real sense about armor plate prices. But
al the same time they are betraying the
enormous profit that they have made in
the past.
New York World Three hundred good
Jobs offered TO 200 men In the Salvation
Army bread line having brought but five
takers the free-food enterprise was
abruptly terminated by official orders.
praauunahIv tho Ancient and Honora BILE
Sons OF Rest will now order a boycott Of
the army on the ground Of all mems equal
right to soldier.
Springfield Republican: The dean Of
st. Pauls in London says: IF were a
betting man, which, of course. 1 am not,
I would give two to one on peace before
Christmas" AS the deans critics are
wont 10 call him a pessimistic man, he
no doubt hasn't Intentionally exaggerated
the prospects of peace. One is therefore
glad that he would offer two to one on
the proposition II he we're a sporting man
instead OF a clergyman
Springfield Republican: The unkindest
cut OF all that William ]. Bryan has beer
receiving OF late comes from an Omaha
man who formally protests the appear
ance OF Mr. Bryan's name on the pri-
mary ballot as a delegate-at-lsrge to the
democratic national convention. This cit.
izen charges that Mr.. Bryan is not q
democrat. and he demands that the state
officials in authority set a date fol
| threshing the matter out. Notwithstand
ing which the former secretary of STATE
will appear in st. Louis with the Ne
braska delegation--he will be heard"
Omaha daily bee., 1916-03-24
Twice Told Tales
A bad scare.

A Southern man tells of a darky named Theophlus
Baxter known ''the champion banjo player Of
Alabama"
Wishing to afford a Northern friend example
OF real dsrky music. Mobile woman went TO Bax-
ters with view TO enlisting his services at
a musical function. She found his wife instead.
Very sorry, Missy" said Baxter's spouse. but
Theophus he amt piayin' de banjo any He
Jest puts in ali his time fishin' now"
What led him to give up his playins?' asked the
disappointed caller Has he got Tegion7'
mo. Missy ne amt got religion. but he's done
got skeered."
"scared9 OF whatr'
"of dat minstrel show. honey De boss learns dat
my ole man kin play, an he offers him stiddy JOB
don' II. Yassum. an Il skeered Theophius so bad
dat he quit banjo payin right away."-New York
Times
Omaha daily bee., 1916-03-24
THE LITTLE ToILERs.

JOY Montgomery Higgins in N. Y Times
Oh, brief is childhood's life,
A little span-a day!
Yesterday 1 was playing in the sand.
Today my hair is gray
Little children at the wheel
Deaf with the factory's din,
To open the Fairgrounds In the world
And see you trooping In!
To see you faces. pale and wan,
Grow ruddv In the air
To see you dancing on the green
To pipers playing there.
From every land to call you in,
Each toiling girl and boy
And give you back your own
Your heritage of JOY
oh, brief is childhood's life,
A little span-a day;
We should not need their toll
oh, let the children playl
Omaha daily bee., 1916-03-24

OMAHA. March 23-To the Editor Of
The Bee; In regard to the Mexican
trouble I take this method of expressing
my thoughts towards it. Sending Gen
eral Pershing after Villa is the most
foolish move that could have been taken.
1t is not only a great waste of money,
but also a loss of lives. II they do get
villa It will not stop the trouble. The
Mexicans are incapable of governing
themselves. The best move that "U. s.
could do is 70 intervene and go from the
'Rio Grande to the Panama canal" and
open up the land. Mexico is one of the
richest countries in the world and 81
would not only benefit the United States
but the whole world. II would help us
hold the Panama canal and expand ouI
commerce. l.. ]. POUCHER.
Omaha daily bee., 1916-03-24
Rapid Promotion.

For three hours the American consul in a certain
Mexican town had been sitting in the hotel dining
At length the proprietor TO him.
Pardon. SIR he said. with low bow. Were
you waiting for anything7
YES" replied the consul. Yesterday told Fer
dlnand your head waiter, that 1 would dine here
at 6 It's now o. and ne hasn't appeared yet"
Ferdinand Joined the army early today" the pro-
prietor informed him. 'If the senor--"
Gone, has heT The scoundreli Why didn't he
let know he going7"
More respect please. senor." protested the Mexi-
can. with dignity. Ferdinand has won steady pro-
motion and is q general "-Phnadelphia Press.
Omaha daily bee., 1916-03-24
Prisoners and Patriotism.

An interesting state OF affairs is revealed In
TIE Iowa reformatory at Anamosa; "reforma-
tory" being a Hawkeye euphemism for peniten-
tiary or states prison. Many Of the prisoners
there are eager to enlist and fight the Mexi-
cans. The attitude is very becoming to the
men, who are temporarily sequestrated because
OF some momentary lapse from self-controi that
brought them into contact with the law and It
will doubtless be very gratifying TO the social
uplifters to note this ebulllton of patriotic Inn
pulse among the prisoners. But IL will not
especially interest Uncle Sam, for he wants
only men OF clean records for his fighting
forces. 1t is the belief OF those who best know
that the uniform OF the United States is an
unequivocal guaranty of the character OF the
wearer and neither the army or the navy is
a reformatory. man who is not amenable TO
the laws that govern in civil life could not long
withstand the discipline OF military service.
Prisoners may reform and II is to be hoped
they Will: and they may become enthusiasts
for the service OF their country, but this will
not gain for them the liberty they have for the
time forfeited by their own misconduct. The
cynical Frenehman nearly right when he
said patriotism is the final refuge Of rogue"
Omaha daily bee., 1916-03-24

Booth Harrington congratulated on his vivid and
poetical portrayals OF coored characters told story
at dinner in New York;
IAN old colored man. he said. went TO the polls
day to register.
" What's your name. uncle7 the clerk asked.
" Nah George Washington. sah. the old
fellow answered
George Washington, eh? said the clerk. Well
GEORGE are you the fellow that cut down the cherry
tree?
:" No sab. said the old man. NO sah I amt done
no work at all. sah. 70 nigh onter free years. -
Pittsburg Dispatch.
Omaha daily bee., 1916-03-24

pectedly and changed his clothes.'-De-
troit Free Press.
eater?'
''He tried to lunch off a window yes
terday and now he has a pane in his
stomach Baltimore American.
In case OF war wnat do you think
we ought TO have in addition to the
general staff?'
visOry board OF moving picture ac-
tresses. kansas CITY Journal
Omaha daily bee., 1916-03-24

Secretary OF State Pool has rejected one
filing petition for being short OF the required
number OF signatures. We have no doubt other
petitions might also have trouble passing strict
scrutiny, but. what's the use? The autograph
collecting part of the proceeding is only orna-
mental. anyway.
Omaha daily bee., 1916-03-24

Colonel Bryan says that II Nebraska demo-
Gratis think anyone else can serve President will
son at st. Louis better than he can they should
commission the other fellow to represent them
My. but wouldn't he be surprised and panied II
they took him at his word
Omaha daily bee., 1916-03-24
NE Could Take = Hint.

old Andy Jimson's wife had been dead less than
three months when Andy began 20 take notice" OF
the Widow Bagley. Soon after this fact had become
apparent some one asked Andy how he coming
on with the widow.
We've quit" said Andy tersely.
THAT so7 How did that happenr'
well. by heck, when feller up an asks a woman
10 marry him an she az him with a dipper
o. hot water to throw him. an sicks her dog on
him an calls him nine dffen names and threatens
TO hoss-whp him, he'll take a hint n ne amt an
idjit an took the hint an left Some folks can't
take hint. but kin. by heck!'-Washington Post
Omaha daily bee., 1916-03-24

Lawyer-what sort of neighbor is
he2
Witness-Best one I ever had. Lived
next - him five years
Then you know him Intimately
Never spoke to him Life
Customer like that umbrella stand,
but l don't think II IL worth g.
Salesman-Why. madam, the very first
umbrella that is left in II may be worth
more than that-Boston Transcript
Omaha daily bee., 1916-03-24
GRINs AND GROANs.

I'D the burglars upset your house
much?
Terribly When / entered and saw
everything upside down my first thought
was that Jim had come home unex-
Omaha daily bee., 1916-03-24

Automobilists who are seeking ways and
means Of relieving the pressure on the gas Deit
should not overlook the Congressional Record
as an available source Of supply.
Omaha daily bee., 1916-03-24

Just imagine the plight Omaha would have
been in had the purchase Of the Auditorium by
the city gone by default and let that structure
be converted TO private business uses.
Omaha daily bee., 1916-03-24

Having smoked out the political ambitions
OF Governor Morehead. the country may Crap
Pile whoieheartedly with the sole remaining
problem OF fixing the status Of the hoopskirt
Omaha daily bee., 1916-03-24

There is an old saying, White man IL
mighty 'unsartin,' and black man more So
That Mexican bunch must be still more so.
Omaha daily bee., 1916-03-24

Re-advertising brought the bids for auto
trucks for the Omaha fire department down
Sc, 900. II pays TO re-adyertise.
Omaha daily bee., 1916-03-24

Still. II In this coming political campaign
the candidates are going to be candid" the
people will soon have proof of a lot OF things
they have heretofore only surmised or sus-
pected
Omaha daily bee., 1916-03-24

ION to Panama. Even though prema-
ture. Colonel wstterson will be excused for
shouting and waving his hat.
Omaha daily bee., 1916-03-24

The Real Estate exchange and the Rotariaps
line up with the progressive multitude in de-
manding depot accommodations worthy OF the
city. sturdy. united pull Is sure to bring
results
Omaha daily bee., 1916-03-24

nis bad enough to ride in an otherwise COM
Portable train across the alkali deserts OF Mex
ico and marching through that suffocating dust
must be a hundred times worse.
Omaha daily bee., 1916-03-24

II is pleasing to note that the huge suffrage
petition carried to washington is not wholly
an exhibit OF cloves labor lost" It serves ad-
mlrably as a railyng staff for the conservation
OF waste paper.
Omaha daily bee., 1916-03-24

The office seeking the man is not Obliged
to travel far.
Omaha daily bee., 1916-03-24

II you want to vote at the April primary you
must be properly registered from the place
where YOU now reside. Delay is dangerous.
Omaha daily bee., 1916-03-24

Revolutionists are flocking to Villas camp
United States troops are also coming his way
Omaha daily bee., 1916-03-24

eubscribers leaving the city temporarily
should have The Bee mailed 20 them. Ad-
dress win be changed as often a. requested.
Omaha daily bee., 1916-03-24
No danger mn the raIIroads will relinquI

No danger that the railroads will relinquish
any part OF their valuable terminal rights in
Omaha unless they get something still more
valuable IN return. They owe this city. how
ever. adequate and modern passenger depot
facilities and they have no valid excuse for not
meeting the obligation.
Omaha daily bee., 1916-03-24
01e 1eG8ecs&
.LsNsSs8ooPT
Prennredness.

OMAHA. March 2s-To the Editor OF
The Bee: our friends who believe in and
advocate preparedness claim that the best
guaranty OF peace is being prepared for
defense. II this line Ct argument holds
good then no nation ever prepared for
war. but for peace. Then n that is so.
we should be logical end change the Off
cial designation OF the secretary Of war
to the secretary Of peace. Psychology
plays no small part IN ell OF the affairs
Of our daily life. both individually and
collectively. and therefore to have the
name secretary Of wa constantly before
the peoples eyes I'm reporting the govern
ment activities has the effect Of convey
ing 10 the minds of the people the
thought OF war change from that of
secretary OF war to :hat of secretary of
peace would do no hahn. but might do
wonders psychologically for peace. Let's
try the change. Get the mind of the
people OF the world eti on peace. Get
them to thinking that a cabinet officer
Is appointed especially to promote and
preserve peace. and then we have taken
step in the direction CT an international
society. JESSE =. BRILLHART
Would Sell Jefferson Square.
OMAHA, March 29.-To the Editor OF
The Bee: Why is Jefferson Square? Is
it to furnish a recreation square for ouI
citizens. or a lounging Ilace for undesir.
ables? Mr.. Editor. Il has occurred tc
me that now is a fitting time to dispose
OF this property and apply the proceeds
upon some of the bonded indebtedness Of
this city. and in this manner convert ar
almost useless nonbeneticlal property intC
a benefit debt-reducinx asset for the tax
payer It may be that there are lega
objections to such a procedure which
would make such a step at this time i'm
possible, but II needs he steps could b.
taken 10 have the legislature grant powe
to the city to dispose Of this property
II seems to me a sum of at least s7O0, 90
applied TO our present indebtedness 4
worthy of consideration. However
would be pleased to hear from others ol
this subject, for It should be the aim o
every citizen to grow with growing
| Omaha. J.. NJ. GRAHAM.
3l0 Lincoln boulevard.
Omaha daily bee., 1916-03-24

VIZ ITH the national conventions at Chicago ana
w St. Louis less than three months away, their
Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1916-03-15
RAINBOW CLUB

are very busy keeping house for daddy,
because mother is sick. Daddy and moth
er must both be very happy to think that
they nave two such staunch little women
TO shoulder family cares Mary Wright,
Spring City, Pa, Is coming to see us on
March lS' Only three days more by the
calendar, and we can hardly wait
Seventy more members from Wind Gan.
Pa South Bethlehem sends John Doyle
as its Rainbow representative. Quaker
town. Pa, sends Russell Allen, an artist
OF no mean merit and n great friend of
Elwood Smith. one of our pioneer mem
bers. Florence Chappelle, of Camden, N.
d. can draw very realistic pictures, but
she must draw them in black ink in order
that they may be published. Three very
neatly typewriter applications came from
Cynwyd. Pa, announcing the membership
of Everada, Annie and Russell Gray, What
lot of fun little brothers and sisters
can have together Will Everada write
your editor n ''letterful" of Cynwyd hap
piness?
Dorothy Mofrett and Ruth BerIlngtoff.
or feadon, Pa, are two little playmates
who have recently Joined the Rainbows
Alice Hanson, Manayunk, sent her name
in twice by mistake and was so anxious
not to cause us any trouble that she
mailed a neat note of explanation. Doris
Siner, East johnson street, is a new little
"eight-year-old Rainbow" whose sweet lit
tie letter leads us to believe that she will
be one of our very best friends. oh, and
thank you for the drawing.
Two little forgetful Rainbows sent let
ters last week, One is named James
Cavanaugh and he doesn't send his ad-
dress Che drew a very good picture, how
ever), and the other lives at 450s Regent
street and doesn't sign his or her name.
VIII these members please forward this
missing information? Madeline Eaken.
Llanerch, Pa. just arrived in a dainty
white envelope Theresa Prlzzi, South sth
street, please ask your members to wait
just one or two days longer for their but
tons Many thanks for the drawings II
you make those same pictures In black ink
on white paper you can be assured OF
their publication.
Mollle Fox. Berks street, praises our
button in a dainty, sweet fashion. Elsie
Long, South 18th street, nearly lost hers,
but fortunately she found 1t a little later
on. Elsie is only IA years old and has
eight ncphews and four nieces. What do
YOU think of that? Esther Eastman,
south goth street, has promised her pic
ture and a story. The postman Is anx-
iously awaited. David Vinikoor North
2sth street will please send US report
of Rainbow doings in his neighborhood.