davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Imperial Valley press., 1916-03-09

portant position, who, no matter what
his fitness may be as an educator, or
his literary ability, without taking in
to account or consideration his busi-
ness or executive qualifications, just
so long will extravaganza prevail in
our schools. and the people can look
forward with no hope for any bet
terment along lines of economy. The
county superintendent is a kind of au-
tocrat and is given by the laws of
California great power. The people,
therefore should see to it that the
right man or woman is elected to this
office.
We desire to digress right here, be-
fore taking up the next subject. to
most emphatically state that, while
we have endeavored to show up and
point out some Of the causes and de-
fects in our schools which have large
ly contributed to the excessive bur-
dens Of taxation, and have tried to
point out some of the remedies there
for. still this is Tot the see cause,
by any manner of means, why our
present taxes are SO high in this coun-
ty. We are confident that many of
our affairs in our county government
are being conducted along lines equal
ly as eXtravagant and wasteful as
those of our schools, and this will also
apply equally as strongly in our mu-
nicipal business in the Incorporated
towns as well. Much could be done
by our county and city officials to pro-
tect the interests of the taxpayers by
practicing the same business princi-
Piles and rigid economy that success
full business men follow, especially
when times are hard. Particularly do
we wish to impress deeply upon the
minds Of all taxpayers and every in
terested citizen ii this valley the
great need for the most painstaking
and careful business methods that
must be pursued in the conducting
and handling of the manifold duties
and problems confronting the men
elected to handle and govern the af-
fairs of our great irrigation district
now about to come in our possession.
People should see to it and make it
their business to know that only such
men are elected on this board as
have the brains and business ability
to solve the great problems involved,
or there is grave danger that the peo-
pes ownership Of this great system
will eventually bring ruin upon them.
Before closing our statements along
this line we desire further to state
that the press Of this county could
do much more along lines of real re-
form touched on in this report as we'll
as many others.
Jails.
On the matter of jails we have no
special recommendations to make,
further than to say that we fully real
ize the county Jail is not the best that
could be desired, and that at times It
is undoubtedly overcrowded However,
it is very evident that the county
finances are not at this time in such
shape as to permit of the building of
the proper structue requisite for the
future needs of the county, therefore
we would recommend that the county
do net attempt TO Go anything in the
way Of new construction until there
is some means provided for the same,
and, further, that when new jail is
built it be Of permanent nature and
placed on the grounds adjacent to
Imperial Valley press., 1916-03-09
To NV Patrons.

i Owing to the fact that l have, been
compelled to seek relief from tenn
porary illness due to overwork, l am
leaving my office in charge Of p. A
Mcpherson and will appreciate all fa-
vors shown him.
Adv. A. j.. SNEE. ,
Imperial Valley press., 1916-03-09

CONTINUED FROM PAGE ONE)
surely realize whcc great portion
Of their tax money is going, and it
is I'd to them to then bring pressure
to bear upon their boards Of trustees
Imperial Valley press., 1916-03-09
Grand Jury Reports to
Superior Judge Cole

to see that the present extravagant
methods are stopped. Much, neces-
sarily, depends on the school superin-
tendent of the county. If the people
elect an individual to this very i'm
Imperial Valley press., 1916-03-09
ID. q. N. h. Dance Friday.

The D. o. n. ks invite the general
public to their first annual ball, to
be held at Masonic Temple, Friday
,evening, March 10. Tickets ST. 265
Imperial Valley press., 1916-03-09

t...t.+ Firewood for Sale.
Ed Royce Transfer. s32 Main 81
Phone 123W.-Adv.
Imperial Valley press., 1916-03-09
rARK TwAIN's PROPHECY.

lNl Fmt+fve years in The Innocents Abroad Mark Twain
wrote wish about Turkey Describing Damascus he
said
England and France for lnterpo
mo TO save the Ottoman Empire has richly de-
served for thousand years, hurts vanity these
cooked us from dish
goatskin which have poated
with our Christian rng the through which
they nut over the through sponge! disEked
Turks and Arabs and when Russia
ready hope England and France will not find
good breeding good judgment Interfere
The Birmingham age-herald., 1916-10-28
WOMAN's DEBT TO EDISON

From the New York World.
 Thomas A. Edison might have been a popular tenor or heavyweight champion from the attention the crowd at the electrical exposition paid him, and not attendants to extricate him from the crush. Hero worship is not often based on such substantial grounds as those which actuated this remarkable tribute to the aged inventor.
 No doubt his appearance there under suffragist auspices and his sound" views on the ballot for women helped to accentuate feminine interest in him. But after all the women of America owe greater debt than that to the creator of the incandescent light and the inventor of hundred devices which contribute not only to their ease and comfort and amusement but also to their means of As one grateful woman in the throng said: All this Is owing to you" But there Is more to come, &C., ccrding to the promise of the inventor. While electrical appliances in the home cleaners, cookers, washers etc-"have llSHLeHtu AouocuOiu ioDoi III o W1y eHe@e years ago was not even dreamed of," the development of electrical invention in few years. Mr. Edison thinks, will yet further ''emar cipate women from drudg- cry"
 Here indeed is a mere man coadjutor who has done as much for the sex as any of its own members. and it is grati- flying to record feminine recognition of the fact.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1916-10-28

world over, and before he had reached middle life his name was household word.
 It was only two years ago that a baronetcy was rendered him, and it IS believed that had he lived until the war was ended he would have been made peer. During the war the gov ernment in the name of the crown has bestowed few titles other than mill tary.
 The only wartime peer is Viscount Grey, secretary of state for foreign affairs. But with the return of peace, peerages will be "handed out" in plenty.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1916-10-28
HEROES

From the Peoples Home Journal. Out in the byways, along the little wooded roads, dwell heroes and heroines who never hear the praise of the pealing bells, who are never thrilled by the shouts of the multitude.
 The country physician risks contagion knowingly. deliberately, smilngly. to serve his brother man. He is not known outside the little valley. There is no world-song for him.
 A loving -hearted woman in the sparsely settled neighborhood must stand in the place of the trained, experienced nurse. Her unselfish soul takes the responsibil- ity bravely She willingly does her best. She never dreams of heroism in the service.
 There is the man who quietly slips into the swirling water to save one whom he does not know. The shore is bleak and silent No encouraging voice cheers him on No news reporter is taking notes of the daring deed. Real heroism needs no spur,
 In an upstairs room sits an invalid mother. The other parts of the house may be dull and unadorned-that room Is gay with flowers. Plain food is served downstairs-the tray carried to that room contains only delicacies. Downstairs there is retrenchment-in that room there is abundance Outside the door there may be Encouragement and tears-inside there are smiles and good cheer.
 So year after year a daughter puts aside the pleasures which belong to youth. She has dreams, she has ambi- tions, but the little mother comes first. It has not occurred to her that a line on the honor roll is being kept for her name.
 Real heroism It smilingly picks up the ment It speaks cheerfully under phy- sica' weakness. It sings under failure. It climbs silently and consistently over de- feat to victory.
 The famous heroes, plumed and knighted-how the world honors them! What a magnificent spectacle they make as they march to the jubilant crash of music?
 But to the by-way heroes serving faith fully, loving loyalty, knowing of recom- pense, we bring our tribute.
 A long, gleaming space on the scroll of deathless fame is reserved for this great and goodly company.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1916-10-28
LUKE M'LUKE SAYS

Some girls marry for protection. But lot of them marry for revenue only.
 If girls were as anxious to stay married as they are to get married lot of per fectly good divorce lawyers would go hungry.
 Why is 1t that a man always has a yen to do the things that he shouldn't do and hates to do the things that he should do?
 When 8 doctor loses patience he is lia- ble to lose patients.
 If some of the reformers had their way there would be a law compelling us to come into the world fully clothed.
 If 1t happens to wealthy man, he meets with financial reverses." But if 1t happens to you, you merely go broke.
 What has become of the old-fash- toned stork who used to call on the Queen of Spain every year.
 There are all sorts of people in the world, including the man who will sit down and worry because he reads that the sun will cool off entirely in 9OO00,- 000 years.
 Another reason why there Is so much trouble in the world is because lot of people like to see how close they can get to the danger line without step ping over it.
 You can convince "a man that he is wrong, but you are going to lose his friendship.
 A man could get cheaper and better advice by listening to his own con science, but he prefers to go to a lawyer and hand out some coin.
 Grown folks are like children in that they want a good deal that they can't get.
 A man can shoot off his mouth a lot and still lead an aimless existence.
 There are lot of painful sights in life. And one of them Is the spectacle of a 2OC-pound woman trying to look cute.
 It is easy to get in good with a woman All you have to do Is to guess her age 10 years too young.
 Ever notice that some men who are pleasant to talk to are might disagree able to listen to?
The Birmingham age-herald., 1916-10-28
THE JOLLY BACHELOR

From the Louisville Courier-Journal.
 John A. Moore, married, of Philadelphia wants to know whether it is right to tax a married man on his savings and let a bachelor pay nothing more than poll tax because he does not save his earnings A bachelor tax, says MT. Moore, would re- turn a large revenue and relieve marrid men of part of their burden. He thinks a bachelor should pay-possiby some bachelors willingly would pay-a modest tax of s3 year for the privileges enjoy yed by a bachelor, but not, be it understood, for the privilege of being a bachelor. MT. Moore has no such unchivalric view.
 Among the privileges enjoyed by g bachelor are these:
 "They can walk on the city's streets.
 ''They can drink the city's water.
 They can call on, the city's police if they are in danger.
 "They can see by tho city's lights
 'They can ride on the city's high-speed trolley lines (when they are built.)"
 But in practice the gay, care-free bach elor does not invariably enjoy all of these privileges. Sometimes he cannot walk in the city streets because he has not drunk the city water. Again he cannot call on the city police for aid, but must call OH friend to bail him out because the police have taken him in charge. And when the city lights look to him like the milky way at close range, and he cannot see his way to trolley car, he has to pay some one an exorbitant price to take him to his home in taXicab, in some cases pay Ing extra sums to the taxicab driver for ascertaining his identity and address and delivering him at the right place.
 As MT. Emerson has so beautifully said, the waves of the sea do not seek their level, from their loftiest tossing, more surely than the varieties of conditions tend to equalize themselves
 In behalf of the variously and fre- quently taxed bachelor, let us suggest for bearance.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1916-10-28

' When the doughty colonel told Chicago women that he would go to war in de- fense of the fair sex. they cried "hur- rooh!" and waved their dainty handker- chiefs. It must have been stirring scene.
 l "Our strong and virile and rich and un- maimed and organized and highly de- veloped eople."-Secretary McAdoo at Chattanooga. pr. Wilson would not have used so many conJunctives. < <
 Even in a large city circus day is ex- citing, but on those occasions when a big show visits a small town, drawing in country people for miles around, the sen- sation is indescribable. ". & % # What's become of the old-fashioned housewife who would have voiced loud indignation If anybody had accused her of having rocking chair in her kitchen? < * The United States government has no reason to believe that the U-5S violated our neutrality, the British House of Lords to the contrary notwithstanding. + It is denied that General Carranza is preparing to quit Mexico, but Messrs. Villa, Diaz, Zapata and others probably do not credit the report
 |
 Birmingham citizens won't have to go about chewing straws while the farm loan board is in town, in order to land one of those banks.
 |
 Cincinnati welcomed MT. Wilson with wild enthusiasm and 1t is presumed that the brewers on that day did a rushing business.
 If the price of coal keeps going up, people of wealth may soon be making vulgar display by wearing "black dia- monds."
 A New York woman killed her husband in quarrel over child's doll. The gal lant jury may be expected to show due mercy.
 The republicans probably wouldn't mind spending some of their enormous slush fund to put muzzle on the Hon. O'Leary.
  Moralists contend that low visibility in movie theatres encourages the holding of hands, Will the moralists never rest? Now that the allies have found 1t quite impossible to starve out Germany, their only recourse Is to keep on fighting.
 < *
 Naturally the ragtime composer who cleans up million with his songs doesn't care who makes the nations laws. Frisky and full of oats, the democratic donkey looks like a winner by something more than a nose.
 Maybe British statesmen knew what was going to happen to Rumania, but the Rumanians didn't
 Nobody loves the land of his birth or his adoption, more than a candidate for office.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1916-10-28
WHERE UPLIFT FALLS DOWN

From the Pittsburg Dispatch
 A New York association interested in the training of youth has addressed a suggestion to employers in that city of fering to teach their office boys to speak a little less gruffly to the ''boss," to take an order from some one else occasion ally, to keep their feet under instead of on the desk, to refer to customers as gen. tlemen instead of as guys" and to be civil when answering the telephone. It is proposed to accomplish all this in 25 les sons of an hour each, two days a week, guaranteeing that tie boys will become
 "a few shades more angelic each week."
 Anyone who has come in contact with the modern office boy (and who has not D, will say at once that this Is where the up- lift is going to fall down. and fall hard. Employers and others have long ago abandoned hope of reforming the office boy. He is becoming more impossible each day. Two causes have made him scarcer, and, therefore, more arrogant: Longer school years and unprecedented prosperity that offers better jobs. And there is yet another, the lack of disci- pline that seems characteristic of the times. The comparatively respectful of- flee boy of other days has practically van ished The present generation of mothers and fathers can recall the respect with which they obeyed their elders, but which in most cases they seem unable to exact from the children of today. In the schools there is the same compliant, a lack of regard for authority. So, natur- ally, the products of the modern home and modern school are office boys and others who speak gruffly to their elders. and are rude to strangers whether in person or by telephone No course of 25 one-hour lessons, however thoughtfully planned, is going to correct that condition. Sometimes the philosophic parent or boss of today can extract a lot of con- solation from speculating on what the office and other boys of today will have to put up with from the children of the next generation.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1916-10-28
WORLDS LARGEST BRIDGE

From the New York Telegram.
 California is to have the biggest bridge in the world to connect Oakland with San Francisco and relieve five ferry sys- tems
 It will cost s22,O00,OOO. be five and one half miles long, one of the heaviest bridges ever built. carrying ~thfee road ways and four railroad tracks, and two of It's 16 spans will be high and wide enough for any ship to pass.
 There's a job worthy of the United States. We welcome it. Anything to tack the mind of the coast off that infantile paralysis scare called the yellow peril.
 And there's also suggestion to Staten Island how to be rid of it's transporta- tion troubles.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1916-10-28
NIGHTS COMING

By Lurana Sheldon. x The setting sun that shines beyonds the Sends to the crest the last fond smile
 of day;
 rosy gleam blends with the twilight
 gray, And in the lake, the river and the Till The soft reflections scintillate and thrill. Now a lone bird wings slowly from
 the west, With plaintive note, on some mysterious
 quest. n And as the great moons outlines fill. Dim shadows point the fast recedins
 light To cheer the coming of their friend.
 the night. So is day done; it's gloriest lent to keep The passing vigil while dark comes
 apacB, Bringing the calm of rest, of blessed
 sl ep
 And tender memories for our dreams
 to trace.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1916-10-28
STEP UP, CHILLY" SUNDAY
From the New York Herald.

From the New York Herald.
 New York city has been debating the attitude of its Protestant clergy regard ing the prospective evangelistic campaign here by Billy" Sunday and the Herald this morning clears the situation in it's news columns.
 On the principle that the way to get an answer was to ask the question, inquiry was made of the pastors in Manhattan and the Bronx whether they were in favor of or in opposition to the Rev. MT. Sun day and his methods. Ninety eight cler- gymen have declared themselves for the dynamic exhorter. B go on record aganist him and IA are noncommittal.
 The ayes have it. May the devils ears burn!
The Birmingham age-herald., 1916-10-28
English Democracy
 and Hereditary Titles

e IR JOSEPH BRIGHAM, Bart, g the widely known manufacturer of patent medicines, who died at his home in London few days ago, was not only enormously rich, but he was one of England's most noted philan- thropists. His heir is Sir Thomas Beecham, symphony and operatic con- ductor. The deceased was said to have been one of only two pEnglishmen who, starting in life poor, accumulated an estate valued at over $100, ,000.
 It used to be that caste in Great Britain made it extremely difficult for a man born in obscurity to rise to dis tinction. The few exceptions to the rule were military heroes, such as Gen. Sir William Robertson, who, in his early manhood, was gentle mans" coachman. But democracy is growing and the time will soon come when Britishers of Beecham's type, with an hereditary title conferred upon him because of his public spirit and his generous benefactions, will be common.
 Within the past twenty-five years a few rich brewers and prominent tradesmen have been knighted, but titles above knight bachelor have been reserved for men of social or political distinction. Beecham had been plow- boy, but by pluck and perseverance he obtained an education and before he was thirty years of age had estab- lished himself as manufacturer of pills. He was pioneer in the art of advertising and every newspaper and periodical in the United Kingdom and many outside "carried" his "ad." Beecham's pills became known the
The Birmingham age-herald., 1916-10-28
ALABAMA PRESS

1 Dothan Eagle: All the Jonahs were not often Insist on occupying third of the porch swing
 Anniston Star: Our objection to the proposed tax on old bachelors for the support of old maids arises from the fact that most old maids. are self-made.
 Albany Advertiser: Billy Sunday will come to Birmingham in 1918, if in the meantime another earthquake does not take off the head of the other owl at the entrance of The Age-Herald building.
 Selma Times: Col. Marcus Well, Bir- minghams major prophet, picks Hughes and a republican Congress. But Col. Well considerably qualified his prediction with the assurance that he Is not infalli ble
 Mobile Register: The man who waited at the door of a movie theatre, with a bouquet of flowers, to take Mary Pick ford home," will probably vote against MT Wilson because he used to be g. pro- lessor.
 Andalusia Star: The colonel said among other things in his Phoenix speech: 'I spoke softly and carried big stick; Wilson speaks bombastically and wields dish rag The most interesting feature of this quotation is that it be- gins with the pronoun IT."
 Montgomery Advertiser: Some folks in Alabama oppose good roads, cattle tick eradication and the educational amend ment. That isn't joke designed to make you laugh. It is literal fact set down here to show that we have something to be ashamed of in Alabama, for 1t is shameful to stand in the way of progress.
 Florence Herald: Birmingham is walk ing up to the great advantage the loca- ton of the government nitrate plant at Muscle Shoals would be to that city. Not only Birmingham, but the whole south land, will be benefited by its location here. Soon after the election Is over, wa should know something definite about this great enterprise.
The Birmingham age-herald., 1916-10-28
AN sINFANT PRODIGY,

From the Houston Post.
 A Houston lady, temporarily in Wash ington. sends the following Boston dis patch clipped from the Philadelphia Rec ord last week:
 Boston-Harvard s infant prodigy. William James Sidis, who has just ended a year as teacher at the Rice insti- tute at Houston. Tex, and returned to Harvard to study law, declares that Texas girls are bold.
 Its terrible in Texas he told a friend recently. They want to naturalize you, and the best way they can think of is to go get you married to one of their girls Gosh. it's fierce!
 The girls even proposed to me in public. It was awful. The newspapers got hold of it and I had a dreadful time.
 "'How do you like the Texas .girls?' someone asked.
 1T don't was the decisive reply. They flirt too much It was very an moving. But I am happy to say that ar ticle g of my constitution, which pro- hibits kissing or familiarity with girls. is still unblemished.'
 'Sids was one of Harvard's most re- markable students. He entered the uni- versity when little more than 8 child and was graduated at the age students usually enter high school. At the Rice institute, Sidis was connected with the department of mathematics and taught classes containing girls''
 Though the Post knows the Record to be a reliable newspaper. it does not know that its Boston correspondent is 5 re- liable, nor Is it we'll enough acquainted with William James Sidis to know whether he is a person so deficient in common sense and common decency as to make such an unwarranted statement about the young women of this city.
 Of course, if MT. Sidis happens to be