The Goldfield news and weekly tribune. [volume] (Goldfield, Nev.) 1911-1947, 1916-07-01
Miss links,
Domesteopath
By r. A. Mitchell

IOdu 10 WuICu was III a SAShs "a
links. Domesteopath."
Now, | had often heard of the allo
path. hydropath, osteopath and other
schools, but never before had Il seen
the word domesteopath. drove on.
wondering what it meant, my curiosity
rising with every mile ! receded from
It till | could stand it no longer. Then
/ turned, rode back to the house. left
my car In the road and went up to
the door. There was no bell. but an
old fashioned iron knocker, represent
ing the face of a smiling girl. | rap
ped
A lady came to the door who was
in appearance as unintelligible as the
sign She might have been fifty, yet
she was dressed like a girl of sixteen
While her face and figure smacked of
youth. it at the same time Smacked of
age asked if she was DR.. links.
She said she was Miss links and in
vited me into a cozy consulting room.
What is your speciality" ] asked
her
"~Squabbles." she said in a cracked
voice as peculiar as her appearance.
~"Squabbles? | never heard Of that
disease"
Its universal. Every one suffers
from 1t more or less"
What are the symptomsT
1T M largely from overstrained
nerves Sometimes it is reasonable.
though usually unreasonable. Ii is
most common between husband and
wife. for the reason that a man Is q
man. while a woman is half child"
What. You. a woman. make that
statement"
"a man living with a woman" she
went on. ''is continually in the pres
ence of a being made up entirely diff
ferent from himself. and vice versa
Therefore they are subject at all times
to the disease Of which | make a spe
cialty-squabbles."
"Oh. I see. Well. l don't know that
my wife and | have any more of that
disease than the average couple AT
the same time
The last four words were enough for
Miss links. She told me of Difficult
ties | had with my wife with as much
exactness as if she had been a mem
Der of my family They were not seri
Gus. but annoying. and sometimes Dor
dered on what might he called quar-
relsOme.
And you eradicate these difficulties,
these squabbles. as you call them?
wherever | can get my patients to
take my medicine"
What is your treatment?"
THAT is my secret. If You desire
me to treat you and your wife | shall
charge you a fee to begin with
You would need to call upon my
wife" | interrupted, land | don't see
what reason could be offered for do
ing So"
mot at all Your wife will call
on me-"
How do you make out thatT"
"Give me your address and | will
send her my card"
How would that effect the pur
pose?"
What led you TO make this visitT
Curiosity"
Twill you deny that your wife has
less curiosity than you?"
ION the contrary. she has ten times
as much as l."
"She need not know you have been
here. AS | was about to say when
you interrupted me, | shall charge yon
a consulting fee of s. and will charge
yOur wife a fee of $40"
Why charge my wife more than
me?"
People only value what costs them
something. a woman is always bound
Il get the full value of her money II
you wife pays a good sum for my
advice she will be more apt to fol
low it. The man is more liable to act
upOn the value Of what he receives as
he sees it,"
You surely know your e
I'VE women all know one another"
Before | left Miss links | handed
her a five dollar bill and gave her my
home address, asking her for the med
icine. But she said a prescription
would be sent in due time, Squabbles
was a plural disease; no one could
ldNc II NltlOut INV uidtIIS Sohit 'IN
else. The cure must therefore be plu
raj. | saw the point and submitted
to be guided by Miss Jinks method
| left her trusting that her efforts to
cure my wife would be successful
Since all our difficulties were her fault.
the treatment would naturally pertain
to her. Miss links did not g~ainSay
this. she ONLY smiled n WiZenpl smile
A few days after this my wife in
formed me that she was going to make
a tour in the car and would be gone
all day. Since ii was Il days ride TO
and from the domesteopath's | assumed
that she was going there. She return
ed without saving where she had been,
but | noticed that when | found fault
with her for concealing her doings she
refrained from answering back.
The nayt mornin0 racaiVa6 nv mail