The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1916-03-30

= that OF course ne wouldn't nave live
through what he did, no matter whs
the surgeons did to him. Well, on
i day Luke was projecting aroGnd Ih
railroad yards, where as a matter o
fact he didn't really have any bushes
to be, and a switch engine backed
freight car or two over him. We'll
when they picked Luke up he certain
ly was about the worst messed up MAJ
who ever breathed the breath of life
The cars hadn't exactly cut off hi.
legs. The wheels had passed over hin
so as to mash the bones of both legs
between the knee and the thigh. They
had also dislocated and mashed up
his internal machinery for the most
part. Incidentally his lower jaw was
gone and one ear sliced off. His nose
was mashed and both eyes gouged out
and one side of his head so badly
bunged up that the brains were oozing
out Of it, and anybody who ever was
acquainted with Luke knows that he
really hadn't any brains to spare. of
course everybody supposed when they
picked him out from under the car
that all there was left was to give
him as decent a burial as his widow
could afford to pay for, out of his
life insurance, but when the doctor
made an examination he discovered
that Luke's heart was still beating
though rather family. while there's
life there's hope said the doc. we
will just try an experiment on this
man. We can't worse it any and we
may possibly get him pieced up So
they took what there was left of him
to the hospital and the doc commenced
experimenting. There was a Mexican
just about to be hung for something
or other and doc asked the sheriff if
he would mind if he appropriated the
greaser's legs as soon as he was
swung off The sheriff said it was all
right with him. If the MeXican's legs
were off there would be that much |
less of him to bury and it wouldn't |
take so much coffin. The sheriff was
a practical sort of cuss. Well, just |
as soon as the trap was sprung the |
doc was there with his knives and |
sawed off the Mexican's legs before he
mad chance to kick. Then he took |
off the mashed up legs of Luke's and
grated on the underpinning of the
Mexican bandit in their place. An
Investigation showed that Luke's in
,ernal organs were so torn that they
never could be sewed together, so the
surgeon annexed the intestines and
also the liver of a William goat and
put them i'm place of Luke's. Luke's
eft lung was badly iacerated, so the
surgeon slipped in the lung of 2
year-old steer in place of that. In
place of one of Luke's eyes that was
missing he put in the eye of tom
,at and in place of the other eye he
Inserted the optic of a large, low
proved bulldog. Luke's brain was so
,adly damaged that the surgeon had
o remove the left lobe and put in
,lace of it a lobe of the brain of an
'urang outang from circus that was
n town. Well, Luke got well, but
here were times when | was of the
opinion that it would have been bet
err if they had let him go. He was
he worst mixed up man after he got
veil that you ever saw. All his ideas
bout things were as mucn mixed up
S his frame. For instance he insist
d on staying out nights and part of
he time was hunting for rats and
art of the time trying to chase him
elf up a tree. He aways mad been a
nan before who attended strictly to ! [
is own business, but after he had
he goat interior he wan;ed to butt
nto everything he saw. When the
uman half of his brain was doing
usiness he talked like a man and laid
is plans with some intelligence, but
lNil NllS ilollNNN idll Was NOihlllS llG
asst monkeyed around. And there
ere times when the cats eye, the
og's eye, the monkey brain, the goat
lterior and the calf lung all got in
leir work at once and then Luke's
beech was a wonder He would start
| on sentence, then bark a few
arks, then yowl and then chatter and
ind up by bawling like a calf. He
hid himself that he never knew when
2 sat down to eat whether he wanted
)g meat, roasted chestnuts, newly
ashed laundry, chii-concarni or al
llfa hay. The more he thought about
the more peeved he go; and finally
I'D me that he had a good mind to
lie the doggoned surgeon for damag-
). One day he met the doctor when
, wasn't feeling right well and went
r him. He clawed the doctors face
t him on the calf of the leg, butted
m off the sidewalk And / say he