The Hope pioneer. [volume] (Hope, N.D.) 1882-1964, 1916-10-26
FINNEGAN's PHILOSOPHY
Pitiless Publicity.

less Publicity? says Hughes. In the
Ash CAM says l. Twas all right on
the stump, but in Washin'ton It's
differ. The Harp that wanst through
Trenton's halls'-I name Tumulty.,
Whin he bursts into song now he picks
his chunc!
"aTis not that Prisidint Wilson is,
less public than Candydate Wilson
He's less pitiless. TITS like the show
man. He tells We all, an more, about
tn illyfant, but he has mintal res'va-
shune about the spotted baby.
$50 it is wild Wilson. He's sof'ned;
he hard heart iv 'Pitiless Publicity
How about the Postmasters?' axes
the refawrumers. We'll niver tell ye,',
says the C'mishun. For why?' says
the League. "T'wid embar'ss tn Ad-
mfnisthrashun,' says the C'mishun.
And the people laughs. 'Ye fired tn
Hid Nv the Cinsus.' says Hughes. 'Ye
lie,' says Redfeld. He raysined Wild
out bein' axed,' says he. 'Ye lie yer
SELF says Durand. 'Ye towld me ye'd
fire me-, an ye gev me place to a
pol'tician,' says Durand. 'Ixac'ly fwhat
said,' yells Pink Whiskers, I was
goin' to fire We anyway, but l niver
;'xed We to raysine.' says Pinky. An
the people oars.
""Tell us about all thin Dishurvin'.
p~immycrats,' says the people. An
Washin'ton is sweep be q storm "
silence.
But doan't We think there's no pub,
licity at all. Teddy himself was none
gunshy with the papers. but he cud
be quiet, too. ,
"Well grab some land In Vinzu-;
eely, says the Ambassydure.
'tem'prily,' says he. Yen not says
Teddy, yen agree to arbitrate,' says
he, or he says, in tin days Dewey'n'
be there says Teddy. /,
"sMe Ry'le Masther will niver CON
STINT says tn other. Thin says Ted
dy, I'll sind Dewey at wanst. There's
no use waitin',' Teddy says. How'd.
EN- says the Am~bassydure. We,
agree says he,-an' divil a bit did we
know how it was for a dozen year.
We'll have Ferdy Carey alive, or
the Bashi Bazook dead says Teddy,
an back comes Ferdy. An the papers
says On demand iv the State Depart
ment Ferdy Carey has been released
An that's all.
SLOW is it now? The greasers
slaughtered twinty at Sanity Isabel. AN
other Mexican Crisis says the head
lines, 'Twinty Americans killed. they
says. The Prisidint Calm a v they.
'Ates Bacon and Eggs. Plays Goluf,'
says the headlines. An the paper
goes on:
""The Prisidint's appytite at break
fast was good, tn leader iv the ma
shun gettin' outside iv' grape fruit,
bacon an eggs, hot biscuit an coffee.
Whin Docther Grayson announced the
bill Nv fare the tinshun over Mexico
was much relaved.
1.-The Prisidint is solvin' in privacy
the Hateful question. "Will me throat
last?" The answer is waited wild few
erish anxiety
"Mondah, the papers says 'Nashun-
al Disaster? Sore Throat Feared, Pan
tic at the Capital. The Prisidint Calm.
Consideration was spread among
all classes today be the report that
the Prisidint ;fwoke with q sore throat.
Strong men tainted before they cud
reach the nearest saloon. There is
talk iv appintin' a day iv prayer. 1t
is hoped that Senior Arre-ye-on-though
will claim that the dead Americans
raysiSted ixicuslun. A high authority
states that this wud end the crisis.
The Prisidint made but wan remark:
A they'd not been there they'd not
Nv been kilt"
"Choosdah, they says, Hope revives.
No sore throat. Bitten by insect.
l'risidint calm. All Phrases Nv Mat
Their to be considered.
1.-The anxiety in the Capital was re-
Iaved today be the followin' bulletin:
"'"The Prisidint has a slight per-
foration in the cuticle over the infery-
ure maxilnary caused by a insect bitin'
him whin asleep. The patient was too
proud to scratch. (Signed) Grayson."
ut is reported also that Gineral
Scott will go to the border to bury the
dead, and apologize to the Insurgents,
He will X Carranzy, whether he wud
accept a loan if offered. This is con-
sidered the thrue s'lution Nv the diff
Guilty.
"Winsdah the Prisidint goes motor
in, T%hursdah he writes a note and
Gineral Scott starts for the border.
Fridah the headlines says Peace in
Europe near. Prisidint studyin' terms.
Will lie stop the war? Another note
expected. Capital excited over report
"But we're comforted be bein' towld
the Prisidint will not be betrayed
into hasty ackshun.
"Sundah. he's considerin' tn Ar
menyan question, an Mondah he adj
vises Grandmothers about suckin'
eggs. And another crisis is past.
$50 it goes ivry day. As I was say
in, there's a'plenV publicity, but it's
not the brand Nv 1922,
Fvi6onf1v Mr. Wilcor hos ~,ao s-