Evening journal., 1916-05-11
BILL JONES, OF SANDTOWN, SANITARY
EXPERT, SCOUTS IDEA OF A POLITICAL
CONSPIRACY IN THE SMALLPOX SCARE
(Contlnued From Page One.l

Continued From Page One)
Hoo wuz took outten town. The kul-
lerd voters. Hoo wuz looked on with
suspishun every time a pnnplc showed up
OF a dash OF barber's itch made Itself
mannyfest? The kullerd voters. Havin'
no ritin' to do, lve bin sittin' we're
tlinkin' an wunderin' whether the
Dimmykrats in this yere sitty has
adopted fightin pollysy of Germin
fritefulness an made Emperor Willyum
honorary ciMeman o, their Stait Sen-
tril Kommittee.'
sez. rite kwick like: "lke, kan
vorcsclfl kan yoreselfl The Dimmy-
krats wudn't do ennything hkc that;
an besides. cf they wud, they wudnt
10 bit five or six months before the gen
eril eleckshunr lie sez: Hits well TO.
be on the safe side. believe in prepar.
edncss an shall ishoo proklamasmn
that hit is the patriotic dooty OF every
Republican anIndepcndent voter to git
vaksinatcd forthwith. TO gard agenst
kontinecnsies. Hits goin' to be an m-
portant elcckshun, an We can't take
cnnv chances" ! sez. "But will the
Bord of Hclth let yu isslu sech prok-
lama shun?' he ser; "Speakin igger-
atively, how mhell is it goin' TO prevent
IL Of I isshu hit uu Fcrst pecstriri Nom-
mittce stashuuory an ignore the Bord
of nelth komplctcly. \cs. stree; every
Republican voter ought to be abil 10
show skab before hc enrolls Safety
furst an preparedness ought Go bc the
motto OF the Republican party even ct
hit haint the polsy ni the i.urd Of
q Na.t. N.rn
kratik kon~liracv i'll hang a yallcr lag
out n fuut of every ninmykmtIk clck-
shun dcestrict pollin' phase next No'cni-
hir.'
tried my best Mar, Ann. 10 kon-
wins Ike that there wunt no use
makiu n vaksinushuu -knh the sign OF
party loiltv an regularity. hut Ne
wudnt be kpnyiuscd Finally 7 sez;
$50 long. Ike" ne scr: $50 Iona,
Bri' An' I mosicd along downtown.
Wen got 10 Forth an Markit
streets. Mary Ann. hon shud ! mcc; hut
our ole freud, karam Jay Awstiu Ely
sun. ui kummy q. UcllyWer Nashunel
Gard Nu remember him. Mary Auni
lie wuz that haudsum rosy-checked fell
Ter that made tho hike down the Stait
With Cuvnu Charley Miller Kernel
Stover an them luther fellcrs Hes the
hero that Kun up 10 uwr iruut porch
in Sandtown AN sed "Bill. my icei's
SO ml Of hlistcrs that want 10 no ef
would ohieck Oi lettin' me tern them
loose in that fccld OF alialicr fer few
hours ~ An he dun hit He's a reel sold
YER Mary Aun There haint aunuihcr
inan In the Stait as kud a-marched
that distins with nuthin' underneath
hint but n set of wclldc,elopcd bhsters
an dcworhcdam determiuashun.
Uthcrs had drlpped oui by the Wuysidc
or bin picked up by The amhulcns. hut
jay Awstin hung fnm an appil tree
branch 10 ecs his blistered feet an
yelled. "Nilfcrd or hu44 a hossi a
hoss, mi kingdum fer a hoss!'
But Mary Ann, kaptin Ellysun
wnsn't half as had of as sum of them
fellers az rode hossos on that mcmcra-
bil hike wen Republican Gunner led
that cNpedishunRerry force into Dimmy-
kratic terrytorry. Most of them hoss
riders kudnf set down fer fcer Of stir.
rim M protect frum saddle gals an
they kudn't stand up in the stirrups fer
feer Of bustiR' blisters on the soles OF
there feet. VI ever fellers wuz between
the devil an the deep bloc see. hit WIZ
them. ] met mi ole friend. klarense
Syferd, Of Dover. up we're today. an |
ast him of he remembered that there
hike He scz; "Bemember hit. Bill! Is
there registered farmasist between
Middletovn an Milford as Kin ever fer
git them soldyers chargin' on the drug
stores with lodid guns an hxed baynits
an yellin' there battle krv of; 'lalkum
powder Talkum powderl Fer Gods
saik give us tallsum powder" Wy. Bill
the tallam powder famine them fellers
breated then has never bin fully re-
leeved. fer in sum OF them towns they
are still usin' kornstarch'
sez; "IIello, Awstini' lie sez
"Hello. Bili" ] SCI: "Awstin, wuzn'i
w selreterry Of the Bord of Hclth be
fore Ike Bowers WIZ elekted" lie sez'
AYES; 7 went out, an Ike went in
sez; "Where wuz yu Wen this smallpox
siklone hit the sittyi" lie sez: "DowI
in the ahattoir KILN the fattcd calf
scz: "In view of yore eXpeerycns il
the Bord Of Helth, don't VA think il wua
wore dooty TO kum 10 the frunt an d
sumthin' fer yore feller sittyzensl' III