Honolulu star-bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1912-2010, 1916-01-08

there are any spies here like there
are in Europe?"
Il dunno f'r sure" Pvt. Kelley said
studiously, but I wouidn': think SO. .
why not?" The Rookie wanted TO
know.
'Twould be ignorance If spy came
over here" Kelley answered. Amy
spy would know av he read tn pa
pers that there was no chanel t get
informashun here Sicretiry Garri-
son has ordered all army OFFICERS
not L talk { amy wan at amy time
about military affairs, which nachul-
ly IS a terrible blow { tn independent
ordher ay spies. Not bein' informed
like tn sicretiry, tbs a new deparchure
L me, IL bein' me impreshun befurre
that spies an newspapers got their
informashun be pokin' aroun' In other
peoples business, but It's iyident ]
was wrong Onless they get il from
ARMY OFFICERS Misther Garrison's or
dher would be av no use at all, at all
"'Twould Be Little They'd Get"
"Av they come now twould be lit
tie informashun they'd get. Afther
findin' out be chance we had an ARMY
over here, tn spy would av course
come over an 20 to tn ARMY orfi-
GERS TO git informashun and nachully
he'd have a har'rd time finding out tn
locashun av thin gran forts .av ours
av they turned him down-onless he
had carfare to go out to the forts.
First he goes T. tn OFFICERS. Gin
eral,' he says. I'm no book agent or
insurance solicitor an will take lit
tie av yer time. 'Tis spy | am and
begin We pardon I'd like { fin out
how much ARMY We have an where
tbs, an amy little fac's about yer guns
we've time L talk over wit me-
I'm sorry says tn ginril, but tbs
not like tn old days anymore, there
bein' an ordher out now agin' givin'
out military secrits Confidenshel,
I'm willin t go so far as t admit /
am q sojer an we have a ARMY
though ! don't know where 1t is as it
gets scattered about a bit at times
an II did know, 'twould not be FIR
me T. tell in tn face av ordhers. Av
course he says, 'av tn secretiry had
not issued tn ordher. 'twould be a
gran pleasure f'r me t pint out our
difinses and show We tn min-av there
was amy he says, an av t could
be managed Z give We tea in We
honor in wan av our gigantic forts,
he says, provided amy av thin would
hold We and We friends, but as ut is It's
nothin' can tell ye.'
Ask Bartender or Newsle.
'Misther Garrison is goin' t make
It hard FIR spies, undoubtedly, putin
thin be such ordhers in a posishun
where they can only fin out where
tn FORTS is an how minny min we
have be buyin drink fer bartend-
er or astin' a newsbye.
"'Tis necessary now t be quiet
wanct / knew an OFFICER that almost
got hisself COURT martialed be telling
some visitors tn name av tn ginril in
command and what time tn min ate
dinner. Since Sicretiry Garrison made
tn ordher I'm tellin' We av, two clans
together will DISCUS a ARMY OFFICER
be their garrulousness, av he hap
pens { run across thin on tn beach.
All av tn conversashun ye'll hear
from tn OFFICERS of wan regimint about
tn ARMY in a mont would go on
monograph record an lave room fr a
complete speech be Misther Brine on
tn good pints av President Wilson, an
av We asst an ARMY OFFICER whether
he thought 'twould be a clear, ca m
day, he'd be afraid t answer FIR fear
ay LAWN himself liable FIR court mar
tial FIR givin' out informashun in re-
gard { the navigashun ay aero
planes. He wouldn't aven repeat The
Midnight Ride av Paul Revere at
BANQUET Ihin Misther Garrison was
prisint on account av maybe gettin'
riprimanded f'r giving out public in
formashun regardin' tn topography aV
tn country an exposing secrlts re-
latin L tn courier service.
Keep EN- OFF Soapboxes.
Wanct since tn sicretiry was forrc.
ed L sind out tn ordher av silince {
kane OFFICERS from draggin' soapboxes
out on the strate corners and de-
scribin' tn forts an guns an hintin
tn hes way L silince thin or talkln
freely to amy wan that wanted infor-
mashun. | heard a ARMY ortifcer |
make a speech { society FIR tn pres |
eryation av peace, or maybe tn ad-
ysncemept av war, fergit which.
Gintlemin,' he says. i am here not |
as a ARMY OFFICER, but as citizen
seekin, the safety av his country,
he saws. an wearin' muffler. Own
in TO L ordher emanatin' from source
ay which, he says, 4 cannot express
me candid opinion. It's little | can say
about anything else. tbs not fr me |
to spake av our crate difinses, ne
SAYS or describe their locashun, bein
barred from givin' out all informashun
but as yen look out ay TIL window,
he saws, yell see wan fort he says, |
over there benin that tree. Nather
is il FIR me t speak av our crate
engines av war he says, mounted
here FIR tn difinse av this fair Ian.
but av ye'll listen at SUNRISE he says,
we can hear it shoot.
Told What 6ugles Meant.
"'Tis har'rd FIR me L tell how Mis-
Their Garrison's ordher came about, but /
me opinion is some ARMY officer in q |
spell av conversashun forgot hisself |
an toll some visitors who come Z /
looks over tn post how NANNY mules