The Hays free press. [volume] (Hays, Kan.) 1908-1924, 1916-04-08

- SAAOAO - O4AC HOAOOA4 Al viz "O@-N
whom the paragrapher fears, it is the
individual who sets up the items.
! oooo
| The globes on the White Way lights
were not made for a western Kansas
dust storm.
It has been suggested that benches
be put around the three trees which
are in the center of the street between
the Reeder and Cochran residences.
Because of the light standard the
benches would not be of any use until
after 1870 p. m. and at that time all
are supposed to be home.
oooo
The small town sport is known by an
expressed desire for roadster six.
oooo
You can determine a persons small
ness by the number of things other than
what he is supposed to know, concern
ing which he sets himself up as judge.
The more things he expresses an
opinion upon the smaller he is.
5000
Unless woman is brilliant she had
better keep along the even tenor of
her way.
When a man boasts that he will not
fatter and cannot be fiattered he for
gets that icebergs are imposing, but
are only set adrift to melt into nothing.
ooOo
A brute demands servitude, an ego
list demands servitude in the form af-
lection.
Suavity in drawing room does not
make a gentleman and although it
fools most women it is transparent to
most men.
A keen self-appreciation is liability
oooo
People who are continually saying
that they are unconventional are so pru-
dish that they fear the unconventional
oooo
1t is almost as good as a hoe and a
rake to peruse the pages of a mail or
der seed catalogue.
oeoo
How many of US watch the blue
''Box rent due" cards in the Postoffice
box of our postal neighbors and learn
how many days they remain unpaid?
Dignity may be great asset, but it
seems rather peculiar that it is possessed
by those who do not have much else.
oooo
GAS said before" prefaces many
yawn in the audience and the speaker
who finds himself using it, should never
speak of unsympathetic audiences.
oooo
Platitudes are the resort of those
who have nothing to say.
5000
Hays is on the map. The picture is
of Chestnut Street and it is late enough
in the afternoon to have the business
section filled with people. She rides up
in her fathers new 'six." After some
desultory shopping in a store or two
she returns to the machine. Behold
her in all the glory of Spring 1916
finery. Her bonnet is an inverted coal
bucket painted in hues bright enough
to rival q sunset over the hills on the
Normal campus and from its side pro-
jects the periscope of a submarine.
Over the back of the seat in the car
lies spring coat whose lining is re-
splendent with the colors of Mt. Vesu-
vius' last eruption. Her waist is made
of that glimmering, shimmering fabric
that suggests the sickness OF an ele-
plants breast combined with the
transparency of SPIDERS web. This
waist is of color that would suggest
= pinkish red and is designed to give
the appearance that it is about TO fall
off her shoulders. The skirt is black
grey-white affair and patterned after
what Walt Mason calls the keg model
which should make prohibition Kansas
blush. The shoes are OF the variety 4
that must be called boots, white, high
and severe. Behold There she stands /
beside her fathers automobile. She is
about TO step up into it. For some
reason first known to Adam the eyes OF .
everyone turn toward the car. The
TO enter the car is hurried
enough to make hesitation possible.
One foot steps upward, one remains on
the ground and the black-grey-white
l6air dess what 81 skixss have dens IA