davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Tensas gazette., 1916-12-01
She Countered Neatly.

Three young chaps were eating in
the dining room at one of Pittsburgh's
pleasure parks, and incidentally were
trying to firt with the pretty waitress
After devouring everything in sight
they decided to have some ice cream
and cake.
What kind will you have? Devils
food. plain or nut cakes?" asked the
waitress.
Give me devils food" said two of
them, and the other asked for walnut
cake.
1.-TWO devils and one nut" cried the
bright young girl.
Tensas gazette., 1916-12-01
vERMIN IN POULTRY HOUSES
Some Poultrymen Inclined to BE Care.
less About Presence Of vermin-
Look About Carefully.

Many a poultryman says: There
isn't a chicken louise on my place."
when he has never really looked at
his birds carefully enough to know.
If your eyes are poor, put on some
glasses that magnify, and look again.
Then get busy. Some poultrymen
should be compelled to spend a few
nights in a buggy" bed.
Tensas gazette., 1916-12-01
Sorry She Spoke.

"John." she said sternly, father
said he saw you this morning going
into q pawnbroker's with a large bum
die"
Her suitor flushed. Then he replied
in a low voice:
"Yes, that is true. was taking the
pawnbroker some Of my old clothes.
You see, he and his wife are awfully
hard up"
"Oh, John, forgive mel" exclaimed
the young girl. How truly noble you
are!"
Tensas gazette., 1916-12-01
cuTIcURA COMFORTS BABY
Suffering From itching, Burning
Rashes, Eczema, etc. Trial Free.

Give baby a bath with hot water and
Cuticura Soap, using plenty of Soap.
Dry lightly and apply Cuticura Oint-
ment gently to all affected parts. In
stant relief follows and baby falls into
q refreshing sleep. the first perhaps
in weeks. Nothing more effective.
Free sample each by mail with Book.
Address postcard, Cuticura, Dept. L.
Boston. Sold everywhere.-Adv.
Tensas gazette., 1916-12-01
Altogether Too Economical.

Mr.. A.-So the Tompkins- Chorkins
match is broken off, is it?
Mr.. B.-Yes. The Tompkins' object
ed to Chorkins being so economical.
Mr.. A.-YOu astonish me.
Mr.. B.-Yes. You know he is a con-
tractor himself, and so sent circulars
to all the ministers in town asking for
their lowest estimates for performing
the ceremony.
Tensas gazette., 1916-12-01
Disappointment.

"What made the man kill the goose
who laid the golden egg7"
Il can only guess at 1t. Maybe food
was costing so much that he got re-
sentful because the bird kept handing
him old metal instead Of regular eggs"
Tensas gazette., 1916-12-01
Xirtuous Youth.

Congratulations, my boy" said the
attorney, 'yOu have inherited a nice
little fortune"
"Yes," assented the fortunate youth.
Il suppose you will pay lot of your
debts nOw?"
Il had thought Of it. but concluded
to make no change In my manner of
living. 1 don't want to be accused of
vulgar display"
Tensas gazette., 1916-12-01
HIGH COST OF LIVING

This is serious matter with house.
keepers as food prices are constantly
going up. To overcome this, cut out
the high priced meat dishes and serve
your family more Skinner's Macaroni
and Spaghetti, the cheapest, most de-
llcious and most nutritious of all foods.
Write the Skinner Mfg. Co., Omaha,
Nebr., for beautiful cook book, telling
how to prepare it In a hundred different
ways. It's free to every wOman.-Ady,
Tensas gazette., 1916-12-01
Wise Younuster.

Little Dick-What are you cutting
out Of that paper?
Little JOhnny-Something I don't
want mamma to see.
what is it3"
ITS an article that says wooden
slippers are coming into fashion"
Tensas gazette., 1916-12-01
"Fifty-Fifty.0

In Cornwall, England, there was q
case involving the ownership of an
eight-day clock. After listening to the
parties the judge said to the plaintiff /:
You get the clock"
What do get7" asked the defend
ant.
You get the eight dayA"
Tensas gazette., 1916-12-01
KEEPING WATCH ON POULTRY
Where Hard Breathing. RattIIng In
Throat and Coughing b Heard
More Fresh Air u Needed,

If you go into the poultryhouse or In
front Of the chicken coop ct night with
out a light and listen. you en- some
times hear hard breathing. rattling In
the throat or coughing. and that
means that the birds need more pure
air to breathe and sometimss . nftis
cold cure.
Tensas gazette., 1916-12-01
A Lover of Truth

George Washington never told a
lie."
Il doubt that. But he was too truth
full man ever to give his personal in
dorsement to that story"
Tensas gazette., 1916-12-01
Pertinent Inquiry.

"See, my dear, what beautiful green
dresses the trees have in summerw
And, ma, in winter they pack the
beautiful green dresses in their
trunks"
Tensas gazette., 1916-12-01
RED cRoss-coopNEss v

RED cRoss-cooDNEss YES.
Red Cross Ball Blue, yes. Nothing
else will do. Red Cross Ball Blue
makes my clothes a beautiful clear
white, not the dingy yellow green
tinge Of liquid blue. Red Cross Bali
Blue for me. Yes sire, Bob.-Ady.
Tensas gazette., 1916-12-01
Difficult Problem.

| There are some sinister influences
behind the boom in this aviation
stock"
THAT may be, but how do you pro-
pose to get after the man higher up?"
Tensas gazette., 1916-12-01
Vanishing Trick.
The noted friends of q no

Aue uOVeu AlleuuS OI y no
clan were his guests at dim
You do some wonderful th,
the stage" one Of the friends ok ---..ss,
but am inclined to think you aro
handicapped when you are away from
your apparatus"
TO an extent, yes" the magician
admitted, 'but there are many things
I can do anywhere on moments mo-
tice."
Let us see you do something now
"All right, take for instance this
steak. the Brussels sprouts and the -
lad"
"Yes-"
"In a very few minutes we viii cause
all Of them to entirely disappear"
Tensas gazette., 1916-12-01

Pimples, boils, carbuncles, dry up and
disappear with Doctor Pierce's Golden
Medical Discovery. In tablets or liquid.
ADV
Tensas gazette., 1916-12-01
Easy Instruction,

what are munificent people, pop?"
why, they're the ones who are
making munitions, son."
Tensas gazette., 1916-12-01
Too Much Of n Strain.

1t was little Martha's bedtime, ana
she was being tucked In. but she was
inclined to delay the process by some
thing she had to tell her mother. Sev.
eral times she attempted to tell her
mother, but each time was told to closo
her eyes and mouth tight and 90 to
sleep. Finally In desperation, 'But,
mother, I want to tell you"
mo, dear. It is time for you to 60
to sleep. You can tell me in the morn
Ing"
But, mother, just can't hold It In
my mouth all night"
Tensas gazette., 1916-12-01
Whenever Ycu Need q General Tonic
Take Groves

The Old Standard Groves Tastelsss
chill Tonic is equally valuable as a Gen.
eral Tonic because it contains the we'll
known tonic properties of QUININE and
IRON: II acts on the Liver. Drives out
Malaria. Enriches the Blood and Builds
up the Whole System. so cents
Tensas gazette., 1916-12-01
Prepared by the United States Depa
ment Of Agriculture)

Vrepared by the United States Depart
ment Of Agriculture)
The great amount of butter renovat-
ed annually indicates need for
marked improvement in the methods
used in making butter. Last year as
high as 3O,OOO,OO0 pounds of washed
or renovated butter was sold in the
United States and much of this butter
was made on farms. The average price
received is low, ranging approximately
from 10 to % cents. The whole mat
ter of the quality of the completed
product, according to J. III. McClain,
dairy specialist of the department of
agriculture, is determined by the way
in which the milk and cream used in it's
manufacture are handled, and the
methods employed in performing the
mechanical operations of churning,
working. and packing the butter.
Tensas gazette., 1916-12-01

Alabama ranks first among the
southern states as producer Of min
erals.
Tensas gazette., 1916-12-01
Quite So.

Birds of feather flock together"
That's a matter Of a pinion."-
Baltimore American.
Tensas gazette., 1916-12-01
Gave 1t a Dose

you naughty child! Why did you
pour your tonic into the clOck?"
cause that was run down, too"
Tensas gazette., 1916-12-01

One burlesque show will keep the
average man awake longer than a doz-
en- sermons.
Tensas gazette., 1916-12-01

THIS IS THE AGE OF YOUTH.
You will look ten years younger If you
darken your ugly. grizzly. gray hairs BY
using la Creole" Hair Dressing. ADV.
Tensas gazette., 1916-12-01
Shop Talk.

Kate Is bundle Of nerves."
Il thought she looked done up."-
Boston Transcript.
Tensas gazette., 1916-12-01
No Consolation.

Beauty is but skin deep"
Exactly, but the girl with 1t has
all the other girls skinned to death"
Tensas gazette., 1916-12-01
Wife,s Mission.

A man never acOmplishes much un-
less he has wife to boss him-so a
woman says.
Tensas gazette., 1916-12-01

"How do you think your state IL GO
ing next election?" fAf
Were going to have a walkover,s
replied Senator Sorghum. But I'm
not quite sure which Of us is going b
get walked on"
Tensas gazette., 1916-12-01
Even Up.

"Did the doctor pay a visit?"
"Yes, and the visit paid the doctor.
Tensas gazette., 1916-12-01

Cuba annually imports about 600y-
100000 feet of lumber.
Tensas gazette., 1916-12-01

Occasionally we hear of a man who
managed to make good by following
the advice of his wife.
Tensas gazette., 1916-12-01

We like or dislike persona not 20
much for what they are - Tor what
they radiate.
Tensas gazette., 1916-12-01
Type Of churn.

Next comes the churning. The bar
rel type Of churn is inexpensive. easy
to operate. convenient, sanitary, and
easy to keep In proper condition. Avoid
churns with mechanical devices inside
Of them, as they are difficult to clean
properly snd they injure the body Of
the butter.
In addition to being insanitary IL not
perfectly glazed, earthenware churns
are heavy to handle.
Tensas gazette., 1916-12-01

Every time man scores a failure he
realizes how little he amounts to.
Tensas gazette., 1916-12-01
Plan Not Complicated.

The correct way of making butter
is not complicated, it is pointed out.
To begin with, cream alone is churned.
being separated either by gravity or by
Tensas gazette., 1916-12-01

No man ought to deprive himself OF
the Joy of a new idea every day.
Tensas gazette., 1916-12-01
CA[0MEL S|CKENS!
ITS MERCURY! DANGER

Dodsons Liver Tone" Sagens You Up Better Than Saang Dangerous
Caome and Doesn't Make You Sck-Dont Lose DAYS Work
Wonderful Discovery Destroying Sale of CaIome| Here
Tensas gazette., 1916-12-01

Kobe has 49S,317 people.
Tensas gazette., 1916-12-01
Formalities DISCOURAGED

Niagara Falls, N. Y, maintains a
free information bureau for the bene-
ut Of visitors.
Tensas gazette., 1916-12-01
Temperature of the Cream.

The first step in churning is to bring
the temperature of the cream to about
50 degrees +. (or to such a temper.
ature not above 65 degrees F., as to
complete the operation of churning
within 25 or 80 minutes). This is done
by placing the can in a bucket of cold
water and stirring frequently. If the
cream should be too cold, place the
can In a bucket Of warm water. AS
certain the temperature with ther-
mometer. After the proper tempera-
ture is reached it should be held an
hour or SO, If possible, to allow the
butterfat to become evenly cooled.
Tensas gazette., 1916-12-01

means of a centrifugal separator, the
latter being preferable and more eco
nomical though the fist cost may seem
high. Convenient vessels for handling
cream are desirable and inexpensive.
The shotgun can, WHICH can be OBJ
tained from hardware stores is one of
the best receptacles for containing
cream, being easily handled, covered,
and washed.
Cream from separate milkings should
be cooled to as low . temperature as
possible $50 degrees +. or below and
kept at that temperature in a clean.
well-ventilated place until II to IS
hours before churning, when the diff
fereit patches should be mixed, thor
oughly stirred, and brought to a tenn
perature Of 20 degrees +. by placing
the can In a bucket of warm water.
During the rise of temperature fire.
quent stirring is necessary. The tenn
perature should always be determined
with 2 dairy thermometer, which can
be bought for 10 or % cents from local
hardware or drug stores. The cream
should stand at 40 degrees f. for about
II to Is hours in clean place free
from OdOrs. BY the end of this time
1t will have taken on velvety, glossy
and acquired a pleasant,
cle |, mildly sour taste. which indi-
Gates that it is ready for churning.
This is called the ripening process. If
possible, the cream should be stirred
two or three times during the ripening
process.
The Brattleboro daily reformer. (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1913-1955, 1916-09-05
Stanley Wilson for Speaker.
(Montpelier Argus.)

1t may be little early to talk
about speaker but if Stanley Wilson of
Chelsea comes back again and it now
looks likely, it is taken for granted in
some sectors that he will be the next
speaker. Mr.. Wilson was mentioned
two years ago, but he was new to
members of the house at that time and
besides was running against seasoned
veteran like Mr.. Weeks of Middle
bury, but later III the session when
the members came to know the hard,
conscientious work he put in thew
were ready to make him speaker pro
tenn if such On office existed. Mr. Will
son S standing in the party as chair
man of the Republican state committee
will entitle him to some recognition
for some hard work done in past cam
paigns whea Vermont had September
elections and was held up as the shin
ing example for doubling Thomases in
other states. 1t seems only a few
years ago that Mr.. Wilson was burn
ing the midnight candle acquiring his
legal lore.
The Brattleboro daily reformer. (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1913-1955, 1916-09-05
MOTORMAN KILLED.
Jesse Young Was Running Car Which
Jumped Rails at Rutland

RUTLAND, Sept. ). = Jesse Young,
former chief of police of this city, was
instantly killed Saturday afternoon
on State street, when a trolley car of
the Rutland Railway, Light & Power
company, which he was driving, jumped
the rails just as it reached the end of a
bridge over East creek. The car, which
turned half around, missed by a narrow
margin going over bank into the
stream. There were a number of pas
sengers on the car, but the only one
hurt was DR.. c. B. Ross of West Rut-
land, who sustained severe facial cuts.
He sat i'll the front seat of the car and
was struck by pole which was felled
by the vehicle.
Mr.. Young was found on the side
walk with his face badly crushed. The
jolt threw him violently out of the YES
tibue and it is believed that one of the
forward wheels struck his head.
Mr. Young had worked for the cleo
trio company only a few months, hav-
ing recently recovered from serious
illness. He held the office of chief of
police here for two years prior to the
present incumbent, Capt. B. S. Hyland.
He was for many years a railroad man
and was member of the Order of
Railroad Trainmen. He was 40 years
old and leaves a wife and three chill
dren.
The Brattleboro daily reformer. (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1913-1955, 1916-09-05

indication of the final outcome it clear
ly could give little hope to the Teutonic
allies. Now come vague reports that
the king of Greece, long held to a posi-
ton clearly contrary to the wish of his
subjects, has left his throne and that
the allies will soon have the support of
that Balkan power. With Russia given
a clear road to the Bulgarian frontier
from the north through Rumania, and
the allied army at Saloniki in a better
position to march north through little
corner of Greece to Bulgaria. the fate
of the Austro- Hungarian empire seems
more easy to read. She is surrounde i
by foes whose armies must in numbers
and equipment far surpass her own. and
Germany. is being kept too busy on the
west and on the north to render her
vital assistance.
The Brattleboro daily reformer. (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1913-1955, 1916-09-05

1t doesn't hurt, so why should l both
er about it? 1t just makes me sound
a little sick
1--WE must be off, them said Grand
pa Rabbit. Wen tell you all the gos-
sip when we get back
"They did feel a little bit nervous
when they got deep into the Woods
near Mr.. VOLTS home. Outside the
front door of an old tree they saw
some of Mr.. VOLTS little Children-a
fine looking set of children-but their
eyes looked as if they were always hun
CRY and the other Animals didn't like
such looks. But they pretended not to
notice the VOLTS Children as they
knocked on the trunk of the Tree,
which was just outside.
Come in, come in growled a deep
voice.
No, you come out said one of the
rabbits. We've come to call on YOU
But sick folks don't 90 out-they
stay in bed. I can't come out. I'm
very sick, you know
"The Animals thought for a time and
then they decided it would really be
The Brattleboro daily reformer. (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1913-1955, 1916-09-05
FRANCISCO MADERO DEAD.
Father of Late President Big Land
owner in Mexico.

NEW YORK, Sept. ). - Francisco
Madero, father of the late president of
Mexico and one of the largest land and
mine owners in that country, was found
dead in bed at his home in this city
Sunday from heart disease. He was 81
wears old Mr. Madero fed to New York
after the assassination of his two sons,
Francisco, ir., then president of Mex
leo, and Gustavo, who had been fnan-
cial agent for the revolutionlsts. Pres
ident Madero was killed February 2l,
1913, and Gustavo two days before.
The samily estates, said to have
been valued at S6.000,000, including
large holdings of land in northern Mex
leo, were confiscated by the Huerta
government, but three weeks ago the
Carranza government informed Mr..
Madero that his property would be
restored to him. Julio Madero, a son,
is now in Mexico arranging with the
authorities there for the transfer of
the estates.
Mr.. Madero was born in Parras,
state of Coahuila. He accumulated his
fortune through investments in farm
lands and in mining and banking. The
Banco Mercantil dc Monterey was one
of his best -known financial institutions.
Mr.. Madero's widow was Mercedes
Gonzales Trevino. member of prom
inent and wealthy family in Monterey.
They were married IL years ago.
Thirteen children were born to them,
II of whom are living. The body viii
be taken to Mexico for burial.
The Brattleboro daily reformer. (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1913-1955, 1916-09-05
S L f. E. PIN G IN A TENT

Sleeping in a tent is a tried and
tested method of getting close to nature
and the domestic mosquito. For some
reason which science has never been
able to ascertain, the American mos
quito operates at his best in wall
tent which has been swathed in netting.
Many man has left an air tight cham
Der two flights up, where he was free
from mosquitoes and breath, and sought
refuge IN tent out in the Yard. only to
arise in the morning decorated with the
pink art craft of the nomadic mos
quito and the treacherous red ant.
a by tent which has been put up
by sixteen year-old son who was in
hurry to go fishing is an inviting
place TO sleep in during a rain storm.
After 1t has rained for while the tent
VIII lose the waterproof qualities it left
the factory with and begin to allow
lean, penetrating streams of water to
Wlggle down the nCckS of the sleepers.
If 1t rains hard the water will also
crawl under the tent and collect in a
large, damp body on the floor, so that
anybody who gets out of bed to tie up
the west flap will have no trouble in
telling what it is at once More inter
nal rheumatism has been caused by
sleeping IN a water-soaked state in n
tent which was guaranteed to stand off
The Brattleboro daily reformer. (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1913-1955, 1916-09-05

a cloudburst than from any other cause
except putting vinegar into the break
fast food
Owing to the lack of space in the
average tent, the spring cot is used as
substitute for beds. As nobodN ever
manufactured cot that was over five
feet long, the result is that several of
the male members of the family are
Obliged to allow their feet to hang over
III graceful parabola or else curl up
like telescope fireladder and collect a
full set of internal contracting cramps
No man ever slept on one Of these cots
and became the unwilling prey of every
homefaring pinch bug without cursing
the manufacturer to his last breath.
Tents are constructed of strong, fl
brous materials which will keep out
everything but the wind, rain and
man eating insects. When one thinks of
the thousands of intrepid American
families who go to roost every night in
the summer III a dog tent, which is
liable to cave in every time the wind
gets above middle C, he viii not fear
that we are losing those heroic quail
ties which shone at Bunker Hill and
the late Chicago convention.
The tent sleeper is an early riser, ow-
ing to the mllkman, the ice man and
the insomniac rooster, and therefore the
practice should be encouraged.
The Brattleboro daily reformer. (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1913-1955, 1916-09-05

That the Austro Hungarian empire is
on the verge of dissolution is the report
that comes from enemy sources. This
may be true, and then again it may be
otherwise. But there is no way to get
around the fact that Hungary is in a
hopeless quandary. Her position<at sew
eral times since the war began has been
perilious, but ever Germany came for
ward and saved the day. Can Germany
do it again? Unless Germany is. IN a
position to rush support either away
from its various fronts or from great
reserve, it looks dark for her ally AMI
consequently bright for the entente
powers.
The Brattleboro daily reformer. (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1913-1955, 1916-09-05

With congress telling the railroads
what shall constitute a day 5 work and
the interstate commerce commission
giving them orders as to what they may
charge for carrying freight and pas
sengers, the arteries of the country are
being pretty finely regulated. And a
large percentage of the railroads have
been conducting business at loss dur
ing the past few years.
The Brattleboro daily reformer. (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1913-1955, 1916-09-05
Member OF the Associated Press.

The Reformer is on sale every evening
by the following news dealers:
Brattleboro, Brattleboro News Co.
Park Drug Store. c.. w. Cleaveland. y
II. Cutler & Co. eEsteyville), Brooks
House Pharmacy.
West Brattleboro, ]. l.. Stockwen.
East Dummerston, NJ. +. Brown.
PGtney, NJ. G.. Williams.
Newfane, N. M 3atcheldsr.
Townshend, c. w. Cutler.
West Townshend, c. II. Grout-
jamaica, r. j. Daggett.
South Londonderry, f. Fl. Tyler.
South Vernon, F. B. Buffum.
West Chesterfield, N. H., Mrs. w
Streeter.
HInsdale, NJ. H., w. II. Lyman.
Bellows Falls, VT, Depot Restaurant.
Bertolno e. Bertolino, +. c. Winnewisser.
Windsor, VT. Windsor Restaurant
The Brattleboro daily reformer. (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1913-1955, 1916-09-05

The European countries recognize the
fact that the use of alcoholic liquors
impairS efficiency. Rumania, the latest
country to come into the conflict, has
forbidden the sale and consumption of
liquors in all establishments throughout
the country under penalty of severe
punishment. With Russia abolishing
the liquor traffic by imperial degree
and England and France restricting its
use prohibition is extending its power
tremendously.
The Brattleboro daily reformer. (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1913-1955, 1916-09-05
lDDY,S EVENING
FAIRY LAE % WARY
~ N{v1 6 soSN4H
MAkE-SELIEVE SICKNESS.

Deep, deep in the old Woods
where Mr.. Wolf lived" said Daddy.
none of the smaller Animals ever
dared venture. Somehow Mr.. Wolf
was bit too wild for any of them
he was too fond of eating rather large
meals-Such as small, delicate AMI
mails for instance, and naturally none
of them wanted to take any chances.
But one day word went around the
Woods whore the rest of the AnimnlS
The Brattleboro daily reformer. (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1913-1955, 1916-09-05
DYsENTERY CAUSES SO DEATHS
There Have Been 1913 Gases in Pough-
keepsie, N. Y. Recently.

ALBANY, n. Y, Sept 5. - local
outburst Of dysentery at Poughkeepsie
caused the death of 80 persons in two
weeks.
The health officers said there had
been l68 cases, the patients ranging
from ten to 20 years of age.
The disease IS on the wane, it is
stated. The water supply is being in
yestigated.
A branch laboratory of the state
health department has been estab-
hshed in the city and three depart
ment nurses have been sent there to
assist IN caring for patients.