The Hays free press. [volume] (Hays, Kan.) 1908-1924, 1916-02-19

Dunlap recital, the people sitting near
DR.. Haas would tell the Doctor that it
was his time next.
oooo
When paragrapher has joined a
lodge, the next time he writes his
column he finds that he must resist
just one temptation after another
oooo
The man who has been frivolous on
momentous occasion has as hard time
to come back as Jeffries and about IS
much success. :,
There is q man in Hays who long ago
ceased being man and is now a hus-
band
Clad 81. Thompson of Starbeams said
that Congress would have nothing to do
with Secretary Garrison because all 1t
cared for was pork. The Spectator
rises to remark that also may be the
reason that the Senate finds difficulty
with the Brandeis appointment.
oooo
Little Miss Margaret Meade says
that she would not like to work unless
she could work In a bank and make
money stuff
This month America congratulates
herself that her abort history can boast
of two such men as Washington and
Lincoln. That's nothing. Hays can
boast of citizen who knows 80 much
that when he dies he believes that God
viii make him His private secretasy.
oooo
When waiting to ride the goat it is
always comforting to know that the
goat will get the pleasure and that you
viii get the experience.
oooo
A woman goes to infinite pains to in
spire man with desire to kiss her
and then rebukes him for attempting
to do so, says J. E. House. Why, OF
course, Mr.. House, you are = married
man.
oooe
A reader of this column told the Spec
tator that she could write the name OF
the person who inspired each Of the
paragraphs. At least here is one she
can.
The Spectator believes in prepared
ness to the extent that he already ha:
made his first tennis date.
oooo
The difference between a fanatic anc
a successful man is that the fanatic is
an enthusiast who does not know wher
to stop and the successful man is ar
enthusiast who does know when to stop
oooo
A peaceful citizen frequently carries
a sword in lodge and wields it as if il
were a pencil or salad fork.
oooo
Looking back up this column the
reader will see the squib-shot at Mr.
House. The Spectator believes that
the use of the word attempting" BY
him applies only personally to Mr.
House.
Toe philosophy of gossip is to theorizc
first and then twist the facts to sui
the theory. Ali the facts are TWISTED
to make it out as bad as the theory o.
to make it ont worse. Facts are never
twisted to make it out better.
Oooo
The Spectator would just as soon lenC
his toothbrush az his fountain pen o.
typewriter. He also wants the Dor
rover to feel the same way.
oooo
During leap year a man has to fisl
|. for the proposals the same a. a CIR
does at other times. Girls, when he
tells you that the United States censul
made mistake, he is indirectly convey
, ing the information that there is bu
one girl.
Going back to the House squib. Tn
rebuke is only for attempting It.
oooo
If Roosevelt and Wilson are the can
didates this year, It willno be neces
sary for the Republicans who refuse
vote the Prohibition or Socialist ticket
they can vote for Wilson. Likewis'
the Democrats who refuse vote TO
Wilson will not find it neeessary to vot
) the Socialist or Prohibition ticket, the.
: can vote for Roosevelt. The funn,
thing about it is that many viii.
oooo
They are making great ado abou
Lincoln and rightly so. If it takes thi
long to become famous, what's you
hurry friends?
NJ ~.