Bogalusa enterprise. [volume] (Bogalusa, La.) 1914-1918, 1916-07-27
lift" Is Not Always an Expert.
ence Which One Remembers
With Pleasure.
OWN DRIVING IS PREFERRED
After All There 10 Only Ono Man In
Whom You Can Have Complete
Confidence, and 10, Of Course,
Il 10 impossible to
Name.

IL ASAuo AAl IucH CdlS. ~ Ills Is HUI Uc-
cause you are envious (for does not
your eight-cylinder beauty hold tho
road with any Of th4mD. No, another
reason has Grabbed what was once a
Joy.
Confidentially. now, simultaneously
with your learning to drive the car the
consciousness rose in you that among
all living drivers there is only one
who really knows his business. This
one, it Is true, has never broksn any
records for fast work; neither has he
spent any unreasonable time studying
under Old Prof. Expert Chauffeur.
But something deep down inside you,
some superhuman instinct, announces
that OF all the drivers on the roads the
only one that can be trusted in pinch
is this here guy. So what happens
when the other man drives Is some
thing like this:
Young Jack (bringing his car to a
sudden halU-Going out this way?
You gratefully climbing in)-
Thanks. Had a blowout this morning
and when took it in / thought they'd
better overhaul the cylinders. Ito
yourself as Young Jack narrowly
misses a stray dog)-Look here, II
you're going to come that sort Of thing
you'd better let me out l used to
enjoy riding with you, but that was
before understood all about
Young Jack unaware that he is in
terrupting your internal monologue)
Say, l never did tell you how that
business came out. did l? You re-
member Johnson didn't want to do it,
but put it this way to Johnson. (To
your horror he turns around as though
you were Johnson, quite neglecting
the car, which is plunging recklessly
to perdition.) Johnson l said
You (too well-bred to remark it
aloud, but none the less fervently)-
You chattering sparrow, turn around
and run your car. One inch more and
we'd have smashed into that telephone
pole. Be reasonable.
Young Jack (the story has been go.
ing right on though you haven't heard
it-And then George came in. You
know George-the big fellow with the
twisted nose? Well, George had been
out to lunch and
You (manfully restraining an i'm.
pulse to take the wheel into your
own hands)-For the love of straw.
berries and cream, you overgrown sim.
pleton, have a heart! Don't you real
ize you pretty near shot US over into
the river? For two cents I'd
Young Jack (who, not being mind
reader is happily unconscious Of the
sentiments sizzling in your brain)-
So all three of US took the letter and
looked it over. Pretty soon Johnson
said .-..,+'>.ssNsrssz,
You-Don't look at me; run your
blighted machine! Do you think l
want to be hauled up for manslaugh-
ter? That old fellow with the basket
back there wasn't more than two
tifths Of second from kingdom come.
Young Jack chow a human being
can sit as he Is sitting right in the
same seat with you and not be con-
scious Of your hostile line Of thought
is mystery)-So we all put our heads
together and
You (agonizedly)-Slow up! Slow
up! There may be a train on
those tracks. There isn't any nagman
and
Young Jack (not abating the speed
by tot)-Well, the letter we framed
up was sure corker and
You las the engineer whistles and
you shut your eyes)-We're gone
sure. you turn your thoughts to
higher things) Lord, I've done some
mean tricks in this life, but
Young lakeland then we all
signed it. Ha-ha-ha!
You (your last hope gone)-Now I
lay me down to- (The locomotive
rushes by, It's hot breath smuggling the
nap on the back Of your coat. You
are safe. Heaven knows how it hap.
pened.)
Young lakeland when old Burbage
reads that letter he'll think
You (you wouldn't let Young Jack
drive you furlong further for all the
wealth Of Indiana. For the first time
you speak aloud)-Hey! Stop her!
Here's where I get oil. No, don't go
any farther you climb out trem-
bling in every red corpuscle.) Thanks
for the lift. Thank you. Much
obliged.
Young Jack (sincere regret in his
voice. -Sorry I can't give you more
OF lift. but suppose my driving
seems pretty tame to you. l used to
take chances, but after a man has
been running chariot for eight years
like l have he gets cautious. So
long.
with your heart once more set
thing to normal you walk the remain