The sun., 1916-12-31
Some of the Bright Things in the
Text-~A Ball Such as Never
Took Place Before

The Queen also is an old friend-nonc
other than Mrs. Maloney with her Irish
broSuc II her waddling gait.
Again the voice OF the Lord Mayor
proclaims the entrance Of Il great per-
sonage-prince Hard-to-Plcasc. lie
shouts. Make way. everybody, except
the King and Queen" and then See
ing the appraised hand of Lord Times
as an ~admonitory reminder adds. and
Lord Times"
Tho Prince bears but slight re-
scmblance in manner to our policeman.
but it must be remembered that the
prince-pOliccman has not yet seen the
radiant one.
The King now raises his hand for
silence and thus addresses his sub
jects:
MY loyal subjects. all all am
as proud % you as you are u me. /.
gives me II my good lady great
pleasure to see you ere by special him
vite. feasting at our expense. There is
"A paper bag for each. containin' W
sandwiches a thrill OF delight from
the children in the box, followed by "A
round burst OF applause from all
present when the royal host adds.
"buttcrcd on both sides: a piece of
cake, n ard boiled egg and a happlc or
a banana"
When the clcc OF he guests has
somewhat subsidized after the an
nouncemcnt of such bounty the royal
one adds: Ladies and gents all.
pleasant though 1t Is Il fl up with
good whites. that is not the chief OBJ
t,... ne chi. ,,,..t g,,y,. "a, 80
for a solemn purpose. namely. To find
4 mate for our noble son. An the
beauties is waiting in the lobhy-uo
wondcr he's excited"
But much To the Chagrin OF the
kingly father. when he turns towar |
the youth he finds that individual
peacefully snoozing.
"Iic will wake up presently" adds
the King in apologize explanation.
but first | want to say
. Here Lord Times hrguidly rises
from his seat and saunters across the
ballroom until he is a few feet from
the throne. The King stops in the
midst of his harangue and asks OF
the interrupter, well. what is it,"
LESS talk" commands Lord Times
with perfect consciousness OF being
we'll within his rights.
"Ccrtainly," replies the royal one,
II h~urr.edly resume his rocking
chair throne without another syllable.
AS he takes his seat he nudecs the
Prince, who languidly rises to- his feet.
After n brief pause the heir apparent
IN bored fashion announces:
My liege King and Queen Mother.
! you can have the competitors trough
in and ! will take a look at them, hut
| ave no 'ope. My curse - this
that ] am a pesslmist about females
! can play with them for an idle hour
and then cast them from me even as
! would cast "A banana skin. can
find none so lovely that may love
her for aye from the depths of my
passionate heart. | am SO blasted
particular. oh. yes. Oh. yes oh,
yes"
Whcreupon he droops back into his
char. and as the King asks IAN
ready the Prince res!gncdly com
mands. Let loose the Bcauts.'
First upon the scene is n charm
lnsly simple girl in white, the physical
embodiment of n picture which Cindcr-
lila has observed and admired in Mr.,
Bodies studio-Greuzc's "Giirl With
the Broken Pitcher" Next appears "A
wonderful trio of naughty world
beauties, likewise "reminiscences %,
the prints which Cinderella has seen
at Mr.. Bodic's-Gainsborough's Ouch
ess of Devonshirc," Da Nincl's
Mona Lisa" and I.cbrun's "Girl with
n MuT Last but most dehonalr of
all Is Sargent's "Carmcncita' in all her
golden splcndor.
First the test of goodness must he an.
pied. The thcrmo-mometcrs are called
for and each beauty has to submit I,
having her temperature taken. TN
Girl with the Muff is alone found I,
be dangerously above normal. All Tn,
others are accepted. although there i,
an ominOus shake Of the head over IN,
showing nrtdc by Mona LISA. Tn.
Prince now eliminates the Carl VIII
tho Broken Pitcher, then the puchcs,
" pevonsl,ire fails tn pas, the re-.
Quirenrnt for small feet and she flee,
weeping from the ballroom. Now onl,
two contestants are left,
You must make' some distinction