The Ocala evening star. [volume] (Ocala, Fla.) 1895-1943, 1915-12-13
THE POSTUM
PARTY
By NJ. QUAD
By NJ QUAD
Copyright. 1915. by the Mcclure
Newspaper Syndicate.l

Judge HeFS1LunOH k<OQSDOuF Oh Len
nessee, who held the Office of constable
once for thirty days and knows how
good it is.
Colonel Cabiff Rocky of Kentucky.
who sweeps out the postoffice in Louis
vile. but had far rather be postmas
ter.
Brassbound johnson of Maryland.
who has led his cohorts against many
a melon patch and will again. by thun
derI
Major Bloker of Ohio, who says that
taking a chicken of the roost without
a squawk is an art.
Several other delegates were TO be
ON hand, but the constable rallied in
force and drove them back.
Brother Gardner stated that the
meeting was for the purpose Of put
ting presidential ticket in the field at
an early date and the party would be
called 1.-The Postum party" The mat
ter was thoroughly discussed and set
tied, and there was an adjournment TO
a later date.
There was mighty gathering at
Paradise hall Saturday evening, and.
acting on the suggestion of Brother
Gardner, about fifty members had
brought their wives with them. 1t had
been announced on the bulletin board
that the Hon. Crabtree Jones of Ala
bama would deliver a political speech.
and the audience was ready to give
him an enthusiastic greeting. He ap
peared promptly at the hour named
and was introduced by the president
amid yociferous applause.
Respectable fellow citizens" began
the orator as he got his feet planted on
the proper spot. two weeks ago dar
was a-bornin' in dis famous hall which
has made talk fur 100000 people.
1t was de bornin' of a new political
party.
MY fr'en's, / had bin waitin' thirty
vars fur de dawn of freedom. ! hev
bin waitin' thirty vars fur de birth of
de Postum party.
"Freemen of free land, patriots who
ar takin' yo'r fust breath of liberty
I'm lookin' at dat stuff possum which
we have adopted as our sacred emblem
an arter which we hev taken our
name. [Typhoonic yells.] Oar has
cher bin bond of sympathy between
de cull1 man an de possum. Dey
haven't had a show wild de big game.
Dey has had to keep still till folks look.
ed upon 'em as dead. [Signs of groans
and repressed agitation.l However.
it's gwine to astonish a hull continent
de way dat possum viii let go an
drap down into de row an demand an
fight fur his sheer of de spiles. IWhirl
winds of applause. during which the
stove fell over unheeded.
"Yo' jest git out yo'r pencils an
| figger a mint Dere's ober 100000
| black men in dis kentry who am emit
tied to walk to de polls on 1eckshuI
! day an cast vote. If dey but hang to
| gether yo' can't count EN- out nor keep
'em back. Dem 100000 votes am
| gwine to be cast for principle. but
doan' make no mistake bout principle
| We used to think dat it meant votin
on sartin. lines an dat George Wash
| ington, Abraham Lincoln, de constiti
shun of de United States an sebera
odder things was mixed up wild it. an
we walked up an put in our votes as
/ if each an cherry one was gwine tC
/ save de kentry. But we Earned il
from de white man. [Cries of 'Yo' BET
we heyr1 We hev Earned dat he sots
out on a political campaign wild cart
load of principles TO glib away free
gratis an punctuate his speeches. bui
| when de ballots am counted up he lays
down his principles TO pick up his of
/ fee.
I'VE am gwine to take hyleaf from
/ de white mans book. Well stick t.
principles. but wei look out fur d.
spiles as well.
My fr'en's. daylight has cum at las
fur US. We's got our bundles packed
an hev started on de road. Yves go
headed right, an ives only to keep Oh
| to find de bee tree an be on hand
when de honey am divided up. Yell
for honey.l Keep yo'r eye on de pos
sum an yo'r brains in yo'r heads an
i YOU win a victory dat Bunker Hill
! couldn't hold a candle to. GENERA
hoarseness. but prodigious applause.
/ want a word mo- befo' close. Dit
| am to be plain, airnest campaign or
| our part. We amt gwine to say much
but what we do say will hit de barr
doah like load of buckshot. Doan
| git de idea dat big words am gwine II
help yo' win what belongs to yo'. Be
fo' dis meetin' opened tonight heard
| Waydown Bebee obsarye dat de malig
| nant innuendo of de torrid affilashuI
would enhance de generality of de pom
posity. He probably meant well. an
mebbe his observation has helped u,
to git started. but l hope he won't d.
it as'in. Doan' nobody do ii. Dis an
no dictionary campaign. mo. mol |
will be plain puddin' an milk at hom.
an plain English when 20 am walkin
up and down wild a possum badge OF
yo'r breast an flag Of liberty in yo'l
hand Muffin counts quicker nor hard
er dan TO call man liar. an d'
languidge am so simple dat child XII
understand it. | will now return 20
my thanks an bow my gratitude fu
de welcome handed out to me-"
Il The orator sat down amid applause
that broke windows and put out lights
and it was continued until the polio,
came zap the alley stairs and dropped
three rsomen and fonr men down upoI
the sand pile below The Postum par
i ty may be said TO have got hold of il
nursing bottle with good grip.