Newark evening star and Newark advertiser., 1915-11-01

tell me about it. don't want to |
hear.
But it's SO easy" said the Grace
fnl Gazelle, mo trouble at all. You
have all you want to eat, only
Only nothing that like" said the |
plump person. "Oh, they can't fool
me. these eat-and- -get-thin people.
I've heard them talk before. Eat all
you want, they say, as many times
a day as you want. Get all tho nour-
ishment you need and don't starve,
and at the end of the month you'll
notice it In all your belt lines.
And then you get their diet list,
these eat-and- -get-thin people. When
you first look at the list it's quite
comfort. It's so long it seems as il
there must be something on it fit to
eat
but is there2
mot so that you could notice it.
"One chop, plenty Of salad with lots
of vinegar on 1t, not olive oil, no ripe
olives. oh, neverl Don't think OF It
for a minutei
mo potatoes. no green peas, no
corn, no bread, no biscuit, no pie. no
cake no sugar in your tea, no cream
in your coffee, no cereal-not thing
you can bear.
I'D as soon be a COW and feed on
grass as to nibble a salad and chew
a chop twice a day and pretend
wasn't hungry.
No sitting in peace, with cup of
tea and some slices of thin bread and
butter What do you want TO be, an
elephant?
mo second cup Of coffee in the
morning, no matter how much you
need II. The rest can sit and drink
with ineffabie looks of giee and satIs-
faction, not you.
"A glass of orange Juice for yours
so warm and comforting, isn't It,
these cool mornings?
And luncheon2 No little dish of
sweetbreads, no creamed chicken left
over from last nights dinner, no
peaches and cream. No. piece OF
toasted bread, unbuttered, a slice Of
cold meat and one cup of tear-one,
mind you--talxen without either cream
or sugar. Eat and grow thin, is it,
why don't they call at starve and
grow fat? That's more like 1t. No.
I'm. going to do the other way. I'm
going to eat everything I want--three
meals day, and then some more, six
days in the week--and one day I'm
going to fast.
Maybe I'll pray too. but I have
my doubts.
myself In the attic. with two new
books and two sour apples and a
pitcher Of water. and I dare anyone
on earth to come within throwing
distance OF me.
"Pm going to starve, and stop pre-
tending.
I'm going to be hungry. and mad
I'm going to wish every cook in
the world was dead, and I'm going
to sit up there and write menus for
all my. dearest foes. and think of ways
l could get them to eat and grow thin.
And the next morning I'm going
to have peaches and cream for break
fast, and ham and eggs nnd creamed
potatoes, and nuffins and waffles with
honey in the comb, and three large
cups of perfectly good coffee with the
fhickest cream in the dairy. and two
Jumps Of sugar. and I'm going to en-
joy every mouthful Of it
.sAnd IL get fat, I'll get fat, and
won't be fooling myself all the time
I'm doing 1t.
"They say the one-day-a-week
scheme viii keep one down.
81 hope it viii. It's the only one III
even try again.
And looked at the plump person,
and my heart went out TO ner in SYM
pathy.
For I, too, belong TO that division
of the human family of whom it is so
often said that they must either ffsh
or cut bait.
Either I want to eat or I want to
starve.
I never in my life could manage
anything.
II my friend likes me, she likes me
for what l am, and no bones about
it. II my enemy hates me, there !
am, in the open, to be hated heartily,
and. find a kind of awful Joy in the
process.
never could economic. and live
on the European plan.
To make up my mind to be eco
nomical, get it out of the way. once
and for all So much a week every
Saturday night-not a penny more,
not nickel less-yes.
So much for breakfast, little more
for lunch, dinner within such and
such a price, Not for me.
| I'd rather have one meal a day and
have what I want, the way want it.
than to play canary bird three times
day and pretend liked it.
| AAAS = ms AAS5A4iSf P4ShtAl6 dAAA
choosing. weighing and balancing,
looking and calculating-all sem
sible, practical. much-to-b praised
methods.
| I wish from the bottom Of my heart
knew how to use them, or could
ever learn.
can't. and what's the use Of pre-
tending?
Ny hand to you, poor, plump per-
soni You don't look half as sweet as
the graceful gazelle, but somehow
feel it in my heart to like you better
than do her.
She'll be a fine person to save my
money for me. but, oh. how I'd hate
to try to borrow dollar from the
graceful sazelle.
She really believes that she can eat
and grow thin and enjoy it.
Such confusion of mental processes
is always a trifie dangerous in a
| friend.
I'm afraid the graceful gazelle
would turn out to be the kind Of per-
son who would tell me unpleasant
things my dearest friend had said
about me, and do It for my own good.
| The plump person never did such
sdch a thing as that in her life, and
never will
] wonder Il that's one of the reasons
she's piumpa