davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The broad ax., 1915-10-30
Dumas an Enioma.

The elder Dumas was the greatest
enigma in the literary world Of Paris,
for who has ever been able to explain
just how and when all the books that
bear his name were written? He loved
the mysterious for its own sake. He
told me how he had dabbled in magnet
ic and mesmeric experiments. He
spoke with absolute conviction Of the
power Of magnetism and declared that
the whole of life and society was, to
his way of thinking, nothing but a
manifestation of magnetic force.
Els talk was like the man himself,
calm, nonchalant, without a trace Of
emotion. He was so far above discus
sion as to ignore it. When he was
speaking he seemed to imply by his
look and manner that it made no diff
ference to him whether you believed
what he was saying or not.-Francis
Grierson in Century Magazine.
The broad ax., 1915-10-30
Fleas a. Jumpers.

The jumping powers Of feas have
been much exaggerated, according to
a bulletin on these insects issued by
the department Of agriculture. The
species known as the human flea
Pulex irritans) is probably the best
jumper. According to Mitzmain, the
maximum horizontal distance this spe-
cies can jump Is thirteen inches and
the maximum vertical distance less
than eight inches
The question Of the flea's jumping
powers is of importance in connection
with the spread of bubonic plague and
other diseases Of which this insect Is
the carrier. The Indian plague COM
mission, which has investigated the
habits Of the Indian rat flea, finds fits
maximum horizontal jump to be only
five inches, while Mitzmain records the
maximum height to which it can jump
as three and one-eighth inches. One
species Of flea. the "sticktight." is near
ly incapable Of jumping.
The broad ax., 1915-10-30
NURSING q Crouch.

What dissatisfied bunch Of mortals
we are! Three hundred and sixty-fve
days Of the year we grumble about the
weather. It's either too hot or too cold,
too wet or too dry. You meet a friend
who says. Its fine day todayp' You
answer, "Delightfulr' The next one
you meet says, Amt this beastly
weather." You answer. 1.-The foulest
ever!" You're always ready to agree
with and join the knoeker. Even the
poor. innocent weather cannot escape
your hammer. Everything in this
world was made wrong-except your
self. mean. You are the quintessence
Of perfection in your own mind When
you're invited to party you are mad
because you are invited, and If you are
ignored you're mad again just because
that condition fits your disposition.
Why don't you. for a change. look at
the bright side of things and maybe
your ''disgustion" will improye.-Car-
toons Magazine.
The broad ax., 1915-10-30
No Simple Life at Ayr.

The simple life" finds no sympa-
thetic atmosphere in Scotland and.
above all, not In. the "Auld Ayr" of
Robert Burns
Aud Ayr, wham ne'er q town surpasses
For honest men and bonnie lasses.
George Ferguson Munro is a news
paper person who writes articles for a
Scottish newspaper. Munro wanted to
live a free, untrammeled, outdoor life.
He began last spring. He wandered
over hill and dale, doing nothing. find
ing enough to eat and drink. lying on a
shaded hillside reading a good book
He interfered with no one. The earth
was his bed, the starry sky his roof.
When 1t rained he went into barn.
Yet for leading this simple life he was
taken by the rough hand Of the law
as a vagabond and sentenced by the
magistrate Of Ayr to three months
hard labor.-Indianapoli News.
The broad ax., 1915-10-30
Both Trumn~tsrn

Among the quaint old epitaphs col
lected In England by an American
with a fancy for odd verse and an
Gent brasses are two commemorating
rumpeters. The first is often quoted:
TIL Angels trumpets on the Final Day
Shall Blow and Graves shall Ope
Here Abram Crumpett in his Tomb doth
Lay
And Waits the Cali in Hope.
The second is less known and, with
all its quaintness, has a fine, bold
swing to it Moreover, the deceased,
as a prose addition to the inscription
makes clear, was a gallant soldier as
well as a musician and had served
through many campaigns. civiland for
eign. Thus it runs:
When Gabriel. Angel, shall hys Trumpet
blow
Uppe from the Sod commanding all be-
low,
Vaster than Armys when those Millions
rise
Ansring that Summons from the Pealing
Skyes,
There's One Ives Here will joyful Rouse
at last
And sound manful Echo to the Blast
John Petres. Trumpetter, who All his
Dayes
Blew for the Kynge his Wars and God
his Prayse
Youths Companion.
The broad ax., 1915-10-30
Ancient Gardens.

Statues were decorative element Of
which the Florentine garden architect
made expensive use. At first a few
antique busts were placed along the
parapet Of the terrace or under the
central loggia, but ere long Greek gods
and heroes. fauns and naiads were
seen at the end Of every alley, while
giants and caryatides were introduced
TO support walls and porticoes.
One great charm of renaissance gar
dens was the skillful manner in which
nature and art were blended together.
The formal design of the giardino Sc
greto agreed with the straight lines of
the house, and the walls, with their
clipped hedges, led on to the wilder,
freer growth of woodland and mead
ow, while the dense shade of the bosco
supplied an effective contrast to the
sunny spaces of lawn and flower bed.
The ancient practice of cutting box
trees into fantastic shapes. known to
the Romans as the topiary art, was
largely restored in the fifteenth CEN
tury and became an essential part of
Italian garlens.-New York Telegram.
The broad ax., 1915-10-30
Curious TeIeuranh Lines.

The most original telegraph line in
the world once extended from La Plaz,
the capital of Bolivia, to the neighbor-
ing town Of Oruro, a distance Of about
156 miles. There are no growing trees
In this part Of the world, and wood of
any kind is so rare that the telegraph
poles were made of the same material
as the natives household furniture
dried mud. The pillars were built on
stone foundations and measured about
five feet square at the base, with a
tapering height of fifteen feet. They
were placed about $50 feet apart. An
other curious telegraph line was con-
structed in Uganda by a British en-
gtneer, who transported growing trees
to the roadside and used them as poles
because he could not find any 'dead"
wood that would Withstand the raw
ages Of the white ants. In Dutch
East India growing trees are also
turned to account in this manner, but
there a wire is stretched across the
road between the trees on either side
and the actual telegraph line suspend
ed down the center.
The broad ax., 1915-10-30
MeianchoIia.

Melancholia does not mean depres-
sion Of spirits. A man may be as de-
pressed as it is possible to be and still
not have melancholia. Melancholia is
dependency on account of painful de-
lusions. One Of the two typical deil-
sions Of melancholia is that the unpar-
donable sin has been committed, that
God has been offended beyond redemp-
ton and that hell is to be the ultimate
goal; the other is that of impending
poverty. Everything is lost or is about
to be. The patient and his family are
going to end up in the poorhouse. His
acts alone have brought about this ter
rible calamity from which there is nc
escape. 1t can be readily seen that
person having decisions Of this type
must be necessarily depressed. There
is probably no form Of insanity In
which the anguish of the patient equals
that of the melancholiac. Life is one
continuous horror.-Exchange.
The broad ax., 1915-10-30
The Horned Lark.

Looks like Satan, the horned lark
does, with his two black horns of feath-
ers sticking out on top of his head.
He wears suit of a grayish brown
touched with pink. A black curve over
his eyes and another black crescent
under his chin help give him a wicked
aspect His satanic topknOt, the two
tiny tufts OF black feathers on the
back of his head. gives him the name.
He's the horned lark.
But really he's not so bad as he
looks. YOu know that the minute you
see his brown eyes and hear him sing.
The farmer knows he isn't such q
wicked bird too. The horned lark eats
all kinds of wild seeds. beetles, weevils
and bugs. If he gets tired Of his diet
he will start in and clean up the grass
hopper and cutworm crop.
Sometimes he will visit an oat field,
but he doesn't cause enough damage to
get his picture In the rogues' gallery
as a dangerous thief. - Philadelphia
North American.
The broad ax., 1915-10-30
Homina Instinct of crahs.

Who would believe that among crea-
lures having well developed domestic
instincts we must include the humble
crabs, the spiders Of the sea-" as Vic.
tor Hugo calls them? Once under wa
ter, we might expect one part of the
sea to be as homelike as another. but
that only shows how little the average
human being understands a crabs
point of view. Some one, however
suspected them Of the homing instinct
and so tried the experiment of catch
ing a pair of them on the Yorkshire
coast in England, and, after marking
them, carrying them south fifty miles
or more, returning first one AM then
the other to the water at different
points on the shore. Then the York
shire crabbers carefully searched their
traps as they made each haul. on the
lookout for the possible return of the
wanderers. Strange to relate, one day
not one, but both of the crabs were
caught a second time, having made
their way back across the intervening
miles Of sea bottom to their Yorkshire
honest. Nicholas.
The broad ax., 1915-10-30
Waterspouts

The waterSpout at sea and the tor
nado on land are manifestations Of
great instability Of the atmosphere in
a vertical direction, caused either by
an abnormally warm surface LAYER of
air or an abnormally cold layer at the
cloud level, says Nature. The former
cause is common in summer: the lat
ter occurs both in summer and winter
and is usually associated with a Zine
squalp' or V shaped barometric de-
preston. The waterspout shows the
track along which surface air passes
spirally upward to restore equilibrium.
The commotion of the sea is due to
the exceedingly violent character of
the phenomenon. The funnel itself is
probably composed partly of moisture
condensed out of air by the sudden
dminution of pressure which occurs
and partly of sea water In the form of
spray. Sometimes the middle portion
of the visible funnel is absent, but
there must in that case be a CORE
spending complete funnel Of rotating
air from the surface Of the cloud.
The broad ax., 1915-10-30
Growth of Wealth,

The wealth of the world grows very
slowly, and the amount of real saving
is amazingly small If, for example,
the wealth of the United States when
George Washington became president
was equivalent to a billion dollars
and that perhaps is not a bad guess
and this amount could have steadily
earned a little over 8 per cent every
year since, this gain, compounded,
would exceed the present estimated
wealth Of this country. This means
that all the rest of the saving and the
gains from new enterprises and a rap
idly increasing population have only
just about balanced the annual waste
and loss. True, more than two-thirds
Of the wealth of nations Is still the hu-
man machine and not the visible tax
able property, but the fact serves to
show how slight is the annual gain
even In the premier get rich quick
country Of the world, the United States.
Carl Snyder in Golfers Weekly.
The broad ax., 1915-10-30
Ruskfn In thu Kitchen.

In her book OF "reminiscences, "Thir-
teen Years Of a Busy Woman's Life, %
Mrs. Alec Tweedie says that her IA
ther. DR.. Harley, a well known Lon
don physician, was a great friend of
Ruskin and often stayed at Brentwood.
One night Ruskin asked DR.. Harley
whether he liked tea or coffee before
he got up.
"a cup Of tea," he replied.
why don't you choose coffeeP'
well, to tell the truth, / have lived
so much abroad that / don't fancy
English coffee. 1t is generally so bad
ly made
His host said nothing. The next
morning DR.. Harley was awakened,
and strong smell Of coffee permeated
the room. Turning to a servant, he
asked. us that my cup of tea?"
mo. sir: it is Mr.. Ruskin's coffee"
MIR. Ruskin's coffeeI What do YOU
mean?"
1.-THE master was up early. He roast
ed the coffee himself, he ground the
coffee himself, and he made the coffee
himself. and he hopes you will like it"
The broad ax., 1915-10-30
He Didn't Sprout HornA

The first Japanese to drink mix did
so with misgivings lest he sprout horns
like COW. That was In 1861. The
man that took that big chance Is Mr..
Tsuboi. who IS still alive and absolute
ly free from horns.
At that time Mr. Tsuboi was an ap-
prentice. He became i'll of q disease
that baffled the skill of the japanese
physicians, so his master called in DR..
Hepburn. an American physician, who
then lived in that district. DR.. Hep
burn prescribed milk, one bottle to be
taken" every morning. The poor boy.
believing that the growth of horns was
inevitable if one drank cows milk,
begged his master not to make him
take the doctors prescription, but his
frantic pleas We're denied.
There was considerable difficulty
about getting milk then because, as
there was no demand for milk-the
greater part of the population sharing
the boys belief that its consumption
was sure to raise horns-there was no
dairy or milkmen. Finally some was
obtained from 4 japanese who cared
for a cow Kept by foreigner.-Japan
Advertiser.
The broad ax., 1915-10-30
Pan-America.

The combined area of pan-America,
exclusive Of Canada, is 100000
square miles. of which the Latin
American countries occupy approx
mately 100000 and the United States
100000. This physical extent of pan
America is better realized when it
is compared with that of Europe.
which has 3.75O.GOO square miles, with
Africa, which has 11,5OO,OOO, and with
Asia. which has 100000.
Pan-America's real greatness, sig
nificance and power in world relation
ship are emphasized by appreciation of
its present population and the future
possibilities for vast increase. Its
twenty-One nations can now boast of
a population of 1S0O0O.0O0. of which
1O0O00.O00 are living in United States
territory and SO,OOO,OOO in Latin Amer
ica.-John Barrett in North American
Review.
The broad ax., 1915-10-30
Limitations of Science.

Johnny was sent to study mathemat-
les, and the teacher told him that it
was q true science.
For instance" she said, IF 1t takes
one man twelve days to build house.
then twelve men can build it in one
day."
Johnny replied: And 2SS men will
build it in an hour, 1880 in a minute.
1,03G.SO0 men will put it up in a sec
ond. Now. l don't believe they could
build even a single brick in that time.
Again, if one ship can cross the Allan
tic in twelve days, twelve ships should
be able to cross it in one day. don't
believe that either. so I'm not going to
study mathematics" And Johnny left
the teacher studying it herself.-Ex-
change.
The broad ax., 1915-10-30
Tonsils and rheumatism.

Rheumatism in its many forms Is,
according to DR.. Seymour Taylor, the
famous British specialist, the most
dangerous disease with which physi-
clans have to deal. more dangerous
than even tuberculosis. cancer or blood
disease. He notes that ID per cent of
young patients who are the victims of
acute rheumatism also suffer from dis
eased tonSils and asserts that ''rheu-
matism affecting young children or
adOlescents leaves mitral stenosis (cou-
traction of the mitral valve Of the
hearth as its most frequent and Grip
pling valvular affection."-New York
World
The broad ax., 1915-10-30
Both Far AWAY.

A prominent Kentucky lawyer had
been in Jackson during the hearing of
a big land case and after the strain of
several weeks in the courtroom had de-
cided to take trip up in the noun
tains and enjoy the quieting influences
Of the hills. He Travelled the paths and
narrow mountain roads till he found
himself, at the end Of several days
journey, about forty or fifty miles from
the railroad. 1t was about noon, the
lawyer judged, for his watch had run
down and he could not be exact. But
in the midst Of this deep contempla-
ton the lawyer came upon an old
darby sitting upon a bowlder along
side the road. what time have your
he asked Of the old darky. "Well, sub.
boss, the old watch says she's about
ten minutes to r." was the reply. rs
that sun time or railroad timer" again
questioned the lawyer. "Whut diff
ence at make? Ones nigh as fur frum
heah as de yudder. "-Argonaut.
The broad ax., 1915-10-30
Storks.

We have no true stork in this coun-
try, but we have the ibis, which be-
longs to the stork family. This bird.
which breeds in the far southern states,
often goes as far north as Indiana.
for it is bird Of long and easy fight,
standing thirty or thirty-One inches in
its length Of body. Its plumage is
white, but wings and tail are black.
1t Is considered a bird of gentleness,
and good nature, associating with
ducks, geese and other water fowl on
pleasant terms.
The white stork Of Europe migrates
to Africa In winter. 1t comes and goes
in great focks, returning year after
year to Denmark, Germany and other
parts of central Europe, where the
birds are welcomed and protected on
account of their value as scavengers.
The common name for the stork In
Holland means ''the bringer Of good"
and In that country, as well as In Den
mark, the people believe that good
luck will attend the house on which
the stork has built its nest.-Savannah
News.
The broad ax., 1915-10-30

Certain cartoonists," says a writer
In Cartoons Magazine, "have been tax
en- to task for pieturing with too al
Turing a pencil the joys of going bare
foot In summer, Of hunting Indians,
Of climbing apple trees. when they
should have been in school studying.
Their work is an invitation to the
small boy to play truant, especially
when the birds are singing and the
sun is shining and a dog companion
clamOrs for an excursion over hill and
dale. Enter the plea 'Guiltyp
"Who would care to be the owner of
a small boy who when the red gods
called wouldn't follow. who wouldn't
occasionally steal away from school
end come back bramble scratched and
sunburned? Any boy whose name is
Johnnie and not Archibald or Ferdi-
nand will need no invitation to run
after the pied piper of happiness and
seek relief from the eternal three RS
under the willows or in forbidden ap-
pie orchards. Given a golden day. the
smell Of summer in the air. a south
wind. schoOlroom. no more than iron
bars. can a prison make. Nobody but
an old fashioned schoolmaster would
expect teller to be proper-always."
The broad ax., 1915-10-30
Scotch Breakfasts.

DR.. Redgill. in Susan Terriers ''Des-
tiny" dwells on Scotch breakfasts with
gusto. After proclaiming that Scot
Land in general is "a perfect mass Of
rubbish" and the cookery not fit for
dogs he adds: But the breakfasts
That's what redeems the land, and
every county has its own peculiar ex-
cellence. In Argyllshire you have the
Lochfine herring-fat, luscious and de-
hcious, just out of the water, falling
to pieces with its own richness. melt
ing away like butter in your mouth.
In Aberdeenshire you have the finnan
paddock, with a flavor all its own,
vastly relishing, just salt enough to
be piquant without parching you up
with thirst. In Perthshire there is the
Tay salmon. kippered, crisp and juicy
"a very magnificent morsel. In other
places you have the exquisite mutton
Of the country made into hams Of a
most delicious flavor"
The broad ax., 1915-10-30
Judges Gowns.

The London Law Times points out
that the silk gown Of the bench and
bar owes its original use to its having
been adopted as a form Of mourning
at the death of an English sovereign.
On the death of Queen Mary In 1894
the present silk gown was introduced
as mourning and, having been found
more convenient and less troublesome
than the regular dress then worn, has
since been continued. The late Sir
Frederick Pollock is said to have ex-
pressed an opinion in reference to the
ordinary costume Of the bar that the
bench and bar went into mourning at
the death of Queen Anne and have so
remained ever since. American courts
adopted the gown along with the Eng
lish common law.
The broad ax., 1915-10-30
The Machete.

Because it is as useful in peace as In
war the Spanish American machete has
a distinction Of its own as a weapon.
1t is sword. spade. hedging bill. ak.
Ratchet and pruning knife. 1t Is first
cousin to the United States cavalry
saber. and almost every male in Span
ish American countries above the age
Of childhood carries one. The laborer
carries it to cut sugar cane. prepare
frewood and trench ground for his
crop. The hOrseman wears it to cut
his way through woodlands during
journeys over rough country. The hi
dalgo wears it with silvered hilt and
tasseled scabbard. His humber neigh
Dor is content to carry it bare and hilt-
ed with horn. wood or leather. The
machete Is made In about thirty differ
ent forms, and the blade varies In
length from ten to twenty inches. 1t
may be blunt, pointed. curved or
straight, broad or narrow. The favor
lite with the labOrer is Of medium
length. with unornamented handle and
broad, straight blade-Boston Herald.
The broad ax., 1915-10-30
Some Kinds of Talking Women.

The woman who tells you all about
something in such q way as to leave
you in complete ignorance of the essen
tial things which you wanted to know
about.
The woman who flatters you about
yourself as a screen to give herself the
opportunity to talk about herself.
The woman who is silent when she
has nothing to say. This woman talks
necessarily.
The woman who asks You what you
think about something and then heads
you off from telling by keeping ON talk
ing herself.
The woman you marry.-Life.
The broad ax., 1915-10-30
Bad Handwriting.

Sometimes the worst of handwriting
becomes Ineligible when one grasps
the rules, for a mans script-particu-
larly an author's-is frequently made
difficult chiefly by his deliberate or
unconscious inversion Of the accepted
rules Of calligraphy. Henry Ward
Beecher had a daughter who acted as
copyist, and she read him with ease
simply by remembering three princi-
ples-that in her fathers manuscript
no dotted letter was meant for an 81"
no crossed letter stood for st" and
that no capital letter ever began a SEN
tence.-Indianapolis News.
The broad ax., 1915-10-30
Simply Separated.

The janitor Of a hall in a country
place was asked by an entertainer from
the city if there wasn't a piano that
he could use for the evenings enter
tainment.
"Waal, yes. there is piano down in
the cellar" said the janitor. "but you
couldn't play on it-leastways, not as
it is. for it's full Of books
Then the janitor bawled to his wife:
Susan. where's the works Of that
pianoT'
And Susan's voice f1oated down from
upstairs:
"Ain't they out in the gardenT-
Washington Star.
The broad ax., 1915-10-30
Temperament In Folly.

The fool in his heart saith a num-
Der Of things. Suppose he happens to
be a phlegmatic fool with a fondness
for luxury.
81 do not care" saith he. In that
case, Ito go out into the damp, chill
woods and mistake a toadstool for a
1 much prefer to get up in
the night, in my comfortable fiat, and
drink out of the wrong bottle."-Bos-
ton Journal.
The broad ax., 1915-10-30
Defining an Art Patron.

"Is your husband so very fond OF
art?''
art, He doesn't know a Raphael
from q hair cut
"Why. | understood him to say that
he was an art patron"
Patron! That man wouldn't trade
n club sandwich for a Bouguereau.
What does he mean by calling himself
an art patron?"
"Why. he says it costs him ten
thousand a year to pay for the bogus
masters the smooth dealers coax you
to buy-and that makes him an art
patron. Plain Dealer.
The broad ax., 1915-10-30
A One Sided Rule

Once when P. T. Barnum was tax
ing tickets at the entrance Of his cir
Gus a man asked him If he could go
in without paying.
"You can pay without going in," said
Barnum, "but you can't go in without
paying. The rule doesn't work botn
WAYS"
The broad ax., 1915-10-30
His Misfortune.

$50 you were driven out Of the the
atrical profession by the movies"
asked the sympathetic old lady. How
did that happen?"
You see. ma'am." replied the truth
full tramp. there amt much Of a de-
mand for stage hands these days.
Buffalo Express.
The broad ax., 1915-10-30
Anxious to Help.

He (after the hOneymoon(-Has your
father said anything about helping to
provide a home for us? She-Oh, yes.
indeed He said that when we had a
home of our own he would buy me
cookbook and allow mother to come
and teach me how to use 1t, even If 1t
took a year.-New York Weekly.