davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Clio messenger. (Clio, Mich.) 1907-current, 1915-11-19
LAY PHYSICIANS.

How good and thoughtful raoEie
are. When sickness gives my frame
4 Jar and ties my yitals in knot,
they come to see me on the trot AMI
tell me what ought to do, II would
be as good as new.
And every kind, well-meanfng friend
has some sure cure to recommend,
some wondrous dope that never fails,
according to his specious tales. Last
week had dose OF grip, so bad me-
thought from life I'd skip. 1t Is punk
and fell disease that makes the vic
tim cough and sneeze and gasp and
groan and grunt and swear and bite
Zig pieces from his chair.
Then Bungshaw, who abides next
door. to my abode came toddling DER
and brought along gallon jar OF
dope that smelled like rancid tar.
The jar in front of me he held.
There's no use suffering!" he yelled.
This dope will cure the fiercest cold
that ever on a man took hold. You
take quart before each meal, ard
in fortnight you will feel so full OF
vim and strength and pith, you'll
The Clio messenger. (Clio, Mich.) 1907-current, 1915-11-19

ual delicious taste OF banana, but the
peeling may be dropped on the side
walk with perfect safety to pedes-
TRANS.
II this is the precise case then the
pceling must be 'nonskid" on the in
side as well as the outer. but this Is
not to be considered. says an ex-
pert as II is contrary to all horticul-
tural laws, past or present. Therefore.
he says, II the "nonskid peel" happens
to be dropped with the "nonskid" side
downward. then the same old, treach-
erous. greasy, deadly. never.failing
calamitious thing will no doubt bring
down its victims as 1t has always
done since the Duke OF Plazzatora,
away back In the days and voyages
or Christopher Columbus, discovered
the banana and also the craftily lay.
ing OF strip of its covering in the
way OF Don Frijolo de Mounteback.
he could rid himself of a powerful
rival and thus get closer to the new
worlds discoverer as well as to the
beautiful and charming Donna Isa-
bella de Mendoza, back there in
Spain.
But time will tell.
The Clio messenger. (Clio, Mich.) 1907-current, 1915-11-19

sic would not have sent it to me if
she had known" Olive paused and
looked down. Molly made no reply.
so Olive leaned over and whispered
something in her ear.
Indeed! How lovely" Molly
smiled into her friends happy eyes.
"And So" continued Olive after an
expressive silence, 81 have no use for
the dress 1t is rather narrow in the
skirt and will be, out of the question
next year. l was thinking"
Olive paused embarrassed. "Will
you promise not to be offended at
what say?" she continued after an
awkward pause,
offended! How could be offend
ed at anything you would say" re-
piled Molly in surprise.
THAT is true" Olive looked
brightly into her friends face. eve
are such friends. You have let me
share your intimate life. l have not
been able to help much, but it was
not because I did not want to. Now
think can see way to give you a
little pleasure and am half afraid to
speak because you might not under
stand. would not hurt you for
anything" Olive paused and took
The Clio messenger. (Clio, Mich.) 1907-current, 1915-11-19

want to tackle Gunboat Smith. Now
let me hold your nose awhile and
pour this dope in where you smilc.
I know II tastes like last years eggs,
but II will put you on your legs"
"I'm hiring doctors" I reply "and
they are paid to help me die, and 80
I have 10 take their cures and must
not take that dope Of yours"
Thcn Tnngshaw toddles home again,
"a mad AZ any moistened hen: ana
whom hc bears me yowl and yelp, he
save: "Hc wouldn't have my help,
ard 90 his groans and whoops and
tears are music in this sinners ears "
Old Mrs. Doodad comes along and
fayors me with dance and song. you
soak Your feet and 20 to bed and put
this poultice on your head and drink
nv homemade bonesct tea. ana from
your grief you'll sooM be free. Don't
laugh my humble plans TO scorn;
cured tho grip ere you were born."'
tell her ] pay the doc to bring
what pills he has in stock. And then
she snorts ard goes her way, and as
she goes hear her say, That's all
the thanks dame receives for brew
The Clio messenger. (Clio, Mich.) 1907-current, 1915-11-19
NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS. SO


Molly's hand in hers.
"You could not hurt me; l know
your good heart too well"
"Thank you. That is a real COM
pliment. ! Will tell you what l had
in my mind. was thinking that you
are about my size and with little
altering this dress would fit you very
well. No one here has ever seen it,
and you could wear it to our little
neighborhood club meetings and look
very stunning. Would you take it ?"
Olive looked anxiously into Molly's
face.
Molly flushed scarlet, and looked
down.
81 have hurt you after ALL" ex-
claimed Olive, laying her hand on
her shoulder.
"No,, dear friend, understand the
kind heart that prompted the offer.
Let me do something to help you in
payment. Then ! can take the dress
and enjoy it." Molly held the soft
blue folds of the silk against her
face. 81 used to be able to wear
dark blue very we'll"
"You can yet. 1t is very becom-
ing. AS to helping, there are lots of
things you can help me make before
next fall. Now try it on. l want to
tsee how it fits you"
The change was soon made, and
Olive expressed herself as greatly
pleased with the effect.
at will have to be shortened
little and that will give new look to
the hem, and as you are such little
thing we can have few more gath
ers in the back by making it smaller
around the waist. 1t is very becom-
ing" Olive could not have been
more pleased with the most elaborate
costume for herself.
81 am especially pleased, because
John always used to notice my
clothes and ! have had none for him
to notice for a long while" Molly
was in flutter of excitement.
"I'll pin it up ready for you to hem
before you take it off. Then you can
have it ready to wear right away"
Olive dropped down on the floor to
hang the skirt.
THANK you, dear friend. Your
loving thought of me is the greatest
part Of my pleasure" said Molly as
she ran down the steps.
~ Ito be continued)
The Clio messenger. (Clio, Mich.) 1907-current, 1915-11-19
THE TABLE

Steamed Eggs - Butter small
molds or tiny cups. Sprinkle each
with chopped parsley. Break an egg
into each and place in sauce pan
with boiling water to come half way
up. Put lid on pan and let eggs
steam until set. Have toast hot and
buttered and slip an egg carefully
on each.
Baked Cabbage--Cabbage, cream
sauce, bread crumbs, butter. Chop
cabbage fine, boil to tenderness in
hot water, sailed. Drain and pour
over cream sauce in baking dish.
Sprinkle bread crumbs over all and
also dots of butter. Bake in oven
about fifteen minutes OF until It is
Drowned.
Pepper Salad--Peppers cut in
rings with dull scissors. Mix with
lettuce and French dressing.
Prune Tart---One pound of prunes
soaked oyer night; two eggs, whites
and yolks beaten separately: half
teasgoonful baking powder. e1e tea :
spoonful sugar, half pound English
walEuts chopped. Bake twenty-five
minutes Serve with whipped cream.
Devils FOo1---Grate one fourth
cake of u-ewcrtercd chocolate in Il
bowl; add one-half cup of boiling
water and teaspoonful Of soda and
let stand until you get the following
ready: Take two cups ut sugar. one
half cup butter, tw, eggs, one-half
cup sour milk and two and one-half
cups of -four NIX with chocolate
and bake in layers For frost;ng,
take one cup Of pulyeri2od sugar,
batter size Of an egg, and cream.
Flavor with vanilla.
''Hcp-in- John" (s0uihcrn dish y
Soak one pint red hears overnight;
drain. cover with cold water ard coos
SOW Y After two ho"rS add half
pourd fat bacon. a chopped sweet
pepI or. salt if needed ard ore pint
rice. Cook two hours larger, or nrtil
all is tender and nearly dr.. Serve
on platter, bacor in the center
Veal Loaf-Three pounds lean
beef, one-half pound veal, six soda
crackers. four teaspoons poultry sea
sonirg. one teaspoon salt, one-eighth
teaspoon pepper, few drops of onior
juice Put meat through chopper and
add other INGREDIENTS. Mix well and
bach in bread Dan. Smooth evenly
on T. Q top. Brush with white 81 EGG.
Bake slowly three hours, haating
VIII onc-fourth cup TT. Prick fire.
' - :
The Clio messenger. (Clio, Mich.) 1907-current, 1915-11-19
HELPFUL HINTS.

Your poetry's no doubt sublime.
your muse Is never jaded. and whom
II comes to building rhyme. you have
take your word for that and load you
with no curses. IL you won't break =
lung or Stat by reading out your
verses. A poet Is harmless lad IL he
takes what he's written and hides II
in his liver pad or In his shirt or nit
ten; but when he springs manu-
script and reads four hundred stanzas.
We say. "This singer should be whip
ped from Gotham clear to Kansas.
Oh, take your poetry, sweet bard. ex-
anime and inspect 1t, then plant the
blamed stuff in the yard, where none
will resurrect 1t.
You have a lovely tenor voice. they
tell me, gentle Willis-a voice to
make the world rejoice and drive Ca
russo silly. But let the old world jog
along without your golden singing.
until il asks you for song, bunch
of nosegays bringing. For all men
hate the guy inspired VINO sings a
ballad graphic, as though he had his
larynx wired for continual traf1lc.
They hate the gent of nerve untold
who awaits no invitation, but spreads
his face till they behold his works In
operation. You'll make your victims
shrek and run, you'll never gain their
pardons; the world, at best, is over
run with tinhorn Mary Gardens. Oh.
don't depend on voice afire to earn
your bed and fodder, for music lovers
don't admire ten-cent Harry Lauder.
Whate'er the gift you may possess.
oh. don't faunt 1t boldly. or men
will say you cause distress and look
upon you coldly.
You may be great at anecdotes and
have a bushel handy. but men who
dread to lose their goats won't say
you are a dandy. The man who tells
a story well, domestic or imported. is
liked wherever he may dwell. and
he Is sought and courted. But you
will notice, II your eyes are not by
folly blinded, he isn't like those tire
some guys who are always remind
ed" He Is not like that turgid chap.
OF whom there's no evasion, who al
ways has yarn on tap, whatever
the occasion. He is not free with an
cient wheeze, with joke that's bent
and hoary; you have to beg him on
your knees to tell that corking
story"
Don't put yeur gift upon parade.
don't in the ring unloose 1t. till every
man and every maid shall urge You
to produce it.--By Walt Mason from
Judge.
The Clio messenger. (Clio, Mich.) 1907-current, 1915-11-19
II ouseh old HintC..1

Charlotte Russe--One-fouth box
gelatine, one-half cup cold wafer one
teaspoon vanilla, whites OF two eggs.
speck of salt, one-haif cup hot milk,
four tablespoons of sugar, one cup of
cream, two cups of whipped crcap.
four tablespoons powdered sugar
Soak gelatine in cold waite. one half
hour, add hot milk, vanilla and four
tablespoons sugar. Stir until sugar
is dissolved, add cream and put on
ice. When it begins to stiffen beat
with an egg beaten until very light,
then add the stiffiy beaten whites of
two eggs, to which the powdered
sugar and salt has been added. Beat
we'll and add whipped cream Pour
into wet mold lined with ladyfingers
or sponge cake and put on the ice to
stiffen.
Fried Cream-Milk, one pint: sug-
ar, one-haf cup; butter the size of
hickory nut; yolks of eggs. three;
cornstarch. four tablespoons: -four.
one tablespoon; vani,la. one-haf tea
sroon. Let milk come 20 a boil. add
sugar and -four wet with little
extra milk: stir over fire for fully
two minutes. Stir in beaten yolks
and !ct coos long enough TO set.
Take from fire and add butter and
vanilla, pour OIL buttered platter
70 tie depth If ape-half inch. When
cold and stiff cut into squares. roH in
beaten egg and cracker crumbs, fry
delicate brown in deep fat. place IN
oven few minutes and serinklc with
sugar.
Stuffed Egg Plant-Bol until soft
one egg pisf,t. make a dressing of
one egg. two Guns crumbs. on@-nalf
cup celery. one-half cnp nuts, one
half Gun crcalr,. two tablcsnoOntp's
Of butter: cut epc plant in naif and
scrape out center: separate seeds
fro 7npulp; add pulp to dressing and
place all in tho halves Of the e%g
plant again. Bake for thirty min
utes in buttercd dish. Basic with
milk.
Dreamed Cauliflower--Two cups
cooked caulifowcr. two ems milk.
one teaspoon salt, one-third teaspoon
pepper. one tablespoon butter. one
halr -tableGnoon -four. Break cauli-
flowepdnto branches and season with
half tho salt ana pepper. Put the
butter in a saucepan. When not, add
the -Four, and stir until smooth. then
odd tie milk. stirring all the time
when sauce hollis. add salt, pepper
-rd c"rhho"'er Cool. ten minutes.
The Clio messenger. (Clio, Mich.) 1907-current, 1915-11-19
NoNskIp BANANA PEEL
New Triumph OF Famous Burbank
Farm,

Now triumph OF Fomooo ouTpauH
Farm,
According to a nevs item wired
from San Francisco We are soon 70
have with us what one writer calls
"the nonskid banana peel" The edi-
BILE interior remains about the same
as the ordinary kind, we are told, but
the new covering presents new
boon to humanity that should make
its discoverer famous il not wealthy.
The genius who is said to be able to
produce nice large banana with a
coat like sand paper is one Frederick
Boegle, employed at the Burbank ex-
pertinent farm near Hayward, Califor-
mia.
The discoverer of the so-called mon
skid peel" as a casing for the defect
able contents guaranteed to be found
inside, explains that the new fruit
was obtained by crossing the ordin-
airy banana with the cactus pear.
Boegel says the new fruit has the u.s.
The Clio messenger. (Clio, Mich.) 1907-current, 1915-11-19

Sutner. "There is
not much wear in
it, as you can see
that it has begun
to break. Olive
held the goods up
to the light.
"That w i | ]
never show, and
you can w e a I
that a great deal
this winter. 1t is
a lovely piece of
goods" comment
ed Molly, taking
a fold Of the silk
b e t w e en- h e I
fingers.
"The pity Of it
is that / can not
make use of ii
this winter. Jes-
The Clio messenger. (Clio, Mich.) 1907-current, 1915-11-19
SARCASTIC TRUTHS.

Before marriage he has duck Mt
il she sees him with shave and
massage that are less than two hours
old or the perfect poise of his correct
tie disturbed hairs breadth; but
afterward he comes to the table with
his shoe strings united, no collar on
and a stubby growth of beard that
would play tune Ii you ran II
through a music box.
The Clio messenger. (Clio, Mich.) 1907-current, 1915-11-19

Ing tons OF boneset leaves! Just lie
and suffer for a while! The more you
howl, the more I'll smile!"
Thus easily we lose our friends
when sickness on our forms descends.
The good Samaritans get sore! they'll
go samariting no more.-By Walt Ma
son from Judge.
The Clio messenger. (Clio, Mich.) 1907-current, 1915-11-19

"This little dress is one that my
sister sent to me. We have always
exchanged our discards. 1t gives US
both greater variety" Olive spread
out dark blue foulard before Molly
The Clio messenger. (Clio, Mich.) 1907-current, 1915-11-19

And some women wouldn't enjoy
living in heavenly mansion unless
they could clean house at least onos
q month.
The Clio messenger. (Clio, Mich.) 1907-current, 1915-11-19

In the stone age man awed women
with clubs; these days women awe
men with them.
The Clio messenger. (Clio, Mich.) 1907-current, 1915-11-19

These days one cannot help admir-
ing the raw and recherche college
youth who goes out and gets a job
and slaves like dog to help pay on
the mortgage on the dear old auto.
The Clio messenger. (Clio, Mich.) 1907-current, 1915-11-19

Laugh and the world laughs with
you unless you-are telling joke.
The Clio messenger. (Clio, Mich.) 1907-current, 1915-11-19

Even the rich have their struggles
these days it's all they can do 70
keep the stork from the door.
The Clio messenger. (Clio, Mich.) 1907-current, 1915-11-19

Hey to the waist line-let fashion
move 1t where she may.
The Clio messenger. (Clio, Mich.) 1907-current, 1915-11-19

But, alas! The things we want TO
do are usually the things we shuldn't.
The Clio messenger. (Clio, Mich.) 1907-current, 1915-11-19

OF course, when an old rake mar
ries grass widow, he'll ruffle her
occasionally.
The Clio messenger. (Clio, Mich.) 1907-current, 1915-11-19

A fool and his money are soon mar
ried.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1915-07-09

You know that Wright case that
you've been engaged in for the
last IL years."
Yes" admitted tho old lawyer.
We'll, what about itT''
I've settled H." exclaimed the
son.
Settled IT." shouted his father.
You great numbering fool Why.
I gave you that case as an an
nuityl"
Il would like rs good cigars for
my husband"
DO you want them strong.
Madam"
Yes. very strong. The last ones
broke in his vest pocket"
Here's q Scrambled
lin Plttsburg q citizen has pc
tltioned TO have his name changed.
His name 10 EGO
Hes sort OF epo-clted about
u. He calls hls six kids the
"haif DOZEN" His name 10 I'M
doubtedly eaGsasperstlns. He
has been beaten. no doubt and
whipped often. Now and then.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1915-07-09
WORLDS GREATEST WATERFALL

WATERFALL
worldI thought Niagara but I've been told
there's one stln bigger. READER.
Niagara is so wonderful cataract that many
peorle naturally think ii is the greatest waterfall III
The world, but As a matter of fact Victoria falls in
the Zambes river in Africa is the greatest of all
waterfalls. The Victoria has descent Of 400 feet,
and Nagaras drop is only i65 feet at the falls
proper, tho within distance of five miles from
rapids TO the gorge into which the cataract falls the
Niagara river drops 800 feet
Victoria falls was discovered by DR.. Livingston
in 1855; traditions of Niagara may be traced back
to 1913, when Champain explored the Lake Erie
region. OF this majestic and ageless cataract Abra-
ham Lincoln once wrote:
when Columbus first sought this continent
when Christ suffered on the Cross-when Moses
led Israel thru the Red sea-nay even when Adam
first came from the hand of his Maker-then as
now, Niagara was roaring here"
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1915-07-09
A LITTLE BIT OF MOST ANYTHING

Judge Ito actor found guilty OF
murder1 And Is there any an
nouncement you would like TO
make before pass the sentence Of
death?
Actor-Yes, your honor. would
like to announce that this will pos
itiveiy be my last appearancel
At the Ribbon Counter
(Characters-bashfuly youth. pref
ty shop girl, cool floor walker.
Time D. m.-Scene. department
store.D
Youth w-w-wish to get s-s-ome
ribbon for a r-r-red baby,
p. Girl--Oh,
Youth mean some baby for a
ribbed r-r-red one,
p. Girl-Beg pardon. sir!
Youth-That is, you know. I
mean some ribbed red baby for
SOMEONE red ribs for one baby
some ones red baby's ribs-some
red ribs for one baby-thunder and
lightning-where's the door!
p. Glrl--Really, he is dlppyl
Floor Walker-This way out.
sir.
. Sure, then. you are related TO
Barney O'Brien?"
Very distantly; Barney was me
mothers first child was the siv-
inteenth."
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1915-07-09
SUNSHINE IN "DULL MONTHS"

OVEN in normal world conditions, July and
IL August are known as 'the dull months in
good many branches of business in America and
ii is perfectly natural that these months should be
somewhat 'duler'' than usual this year. Those
concerned might as well prepare for II, II they
haven't already done so.
People who travel back and forth over the coun-
try testify that in the manufacturing districts OF
the East and Middle West there has been decided
recuperation and that the harvesting of the enor-
nous new crops of cereals turnout the Middle West
is bound TO give conditions boost.
Cotton interests particularly are in much
better shape than at this time last year and there
is no question as to good prices for pretty nearly
everything grown.
They say that if the weakest spot is now in
Pacific Coast conditions, il is due TO the fact that
this region feels hard times last and naturally is
behind in recuperation.
The more eastern regions are dependent largely
upon the iron and steel manufactures ana the South
upon cotton. Both of these got a sudden and
serious blow, a year ago, as the Pacific Coast did
not.
But, finally, this latter part of the country
felt the effects of the general depression
PanicS come suddenly, while recuperation
comes by degrees so that is doubtful whether the
coast region would Immediately respond to even
the highest degree of improvement in the Eastern
business world.
Certain il is that the producers are going to
have plenty to sell at unusually high prices, and
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1915-07-09
- EDITORIAL PAGE OF THE SEATTLE STAR -

that the financial situation of the nation Is the best
of all nations.
The banks have plenty OF money and new
enterprises are largely matter of little time and
growth of confidence.
II is no time for the fellow who can hold on
to "Sel out cheap" his investment in real estate,
railroad or other commercial securities. We're
already quite way above the bottom OF the worst
that the war can do TO MS
II we put our luxurieS on the shelf FOR a time,
and get beneath and boost upward every bit of inn
provement that comes along. wen soon be back in
high clover all right
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1915-07-09
We venture. he manages to
scramble honei

An old Scotchman who lived IN
Edinburgh owned donkey and
rented a shed In which 10 stable
IT, The rental for this shack and
his own cottage entitled him TO n
vote. as Is the custom of the coun.
try.
Hard times came and Sandy lost
everything. But on voting day he
showed up bright and early at the
polling place.
"Ye have no vote. Sandy" ex.
planned the election Judge, 'ye hev
not the dunkey now, ye know"
"Weel." returned the Scotchman.
so twas the dunkey had tho vote
an no me. chr
In the Suburbs
Jones--Er.erer Mrs. Smith--did
I ever return your ladder after !
borrowed III
Mrs. Smith--No. you did not.
Jones-Well. I'm very sorry be,
cause / came over TO borrow II
again,
A Come Backl
Angry Grocer running into his
butchers shop 49, What do you
mean by sending me ten ounces OF
meat when ordered a pound7
Butcher-Well. I've misplaced
my pound weight, so used pound
package OF your tea In its place.
Former Mistress would like to
give you good recommendation
Della, but my conscience oompels
me to state that you never got the
meals on time. | wonder how
can put that in n nice sort OF way?
Delia-Yez moight fist say thot oil
got the meals the same way as OF
got me pay.-Puck.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1915-07-09
OF Youth

o. Youth
An old and experienced lawyer
decided TO turn over part OF his
large practice 10 his son. In order
to start him in life. Everything
went smoothly until on one coca
sion the son came In his fathers
office with a beaming smile upon
his face.
Il say. dad" he said. joyously.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1915-07-09
HERE'S A REAL IDEA, FOLKS!

HERE is booster suggestion which The Star
IL thinks is one we'll worth adopting. A. Iope,
OF the Enterprise Furniture Co., in the university
district, brought ii to The Star office today.
1--WE are always talking about Alaska and
Seate-how much they mean to each other he
said. There's lot of literature about II, but we
should have something which would slap Eastern
erS in the face with the significance OF the fact
that Seattle is the gateway to Alaska
81 suggest metal arch, to span Fourth ave-,
just in front OF the union depots the arch to have
on il Illuminated letters, spelling, Seattle, the Gate
way to Alaska Have the letters easily read in
The daytime, as well as night.
"The man from Missouri and his brothers
from Arkansas and New York, couldn't help see
ing when they arrive in Seattle. The significance
of what that slogan really means would have
strong psychological effect on them. II would set
them to thinking.
THE arch wouldn't cost much. The money
could be raised by popular subscription. I'll give
$40. The railroads probably would give generous
donation The city would furnish the light. And
there you are"
Well, as Mr.. Tope says, there you are, Sc
attic people. Go to IT.