The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1915-02-01
THE NEW PATRIOTISM.
Reflections of the Hon. Eph Small on
Our Improved Neutrality.

our Improved Neutrality.
To THE EDITOR or THE SuN-Sir. MS
a strange age In which we're Twin, "
said Eph Small as we stepped into Don
ovan's cafe.
81 sometimes think" no continued az
he slipped his ale. that there amt
nuthn' ever happened In this here coun-
try that We amt a-goin' to be ashamed
of sooner or later, specially II it's some
thin that happened back in them half
civilized days afore the present Admin
istrdtion."
what's bothering YOU now" in
CURED
80. nuthin's botherln' me-" he an
swered ~ got all over bein bothered
long ago. | take II all now calm an
phil 'sophical. like a good many other
people in these States. We don't know
what's a-comin' but we ask fer grace
TO bear It when 1t comes. Our attitude
tord this country of our'n II somethin'
Ike the Presidents attitude tord Mex
leo. only he watches and waits and we
watch an pray"
well, what's happenedY' I urged,
knowing there was some reason for these
general remarks.
Eph nodded to the bartender and
then turned to me with a solemn shake
OF his head.
AN Invitations ben declined" he
said.
mot here" answered, looking crit
ically at my empty glass
An invitation" he continued, paying
no attention to my observation, that
marks the Hood tide OF pale an nootral
statesmauship. The Presidents de
cliucd an invitation to attend the un-
Nellin' Of monument to Central Ma
than''l Greene. whom yo may rec'lect
was one Of them crude lads that sho,
mp our English cousins In the war OF
the Roviution Tho President says It
would bee onnootral fer him to attend"
Eph gdzcd pensivcly for moment
at picture Of stag hunt hanging over
the bar
I'm the pre-grapeJuice era" he re-
sumcd, lighting his pipe. "some things
was done that bore all the earmarks of
an uuregen'rate age. things that smacked
o. human natur an tho fan % man.
When they happened We thought they
was nll right because At the time we
didn't know no better We was poor, be-
uishted heather, Ignorant Of Chautau-
Guas an missions o. service
Take, for instance, the civil war.
What was II all about? The question
want intricate; simply whether or not
M" South had a right 10 secedc. It's
clear cnun now both sidoa was dead
wrong.
What We ought to n.done was to
make AN agreement with them Southern
states similar to the one we now got
with Honduras. Guatemala Paraguay
am sech-iiko powerful an belIig'ront ma
tons that are likely to attack US any
day without notice. Sech an agreement
would provided that the question pf
secession be debated fer two years on
the thautduqua circuits all over the
United States. At the end o. that time
we'd a-ben talked TO a FRAGILE an the
fust man who'd a-mentioned secession
would a-got plugged In the eye.
An then, thar's tho Spanish Ameri-
can war" he continued after pause /;
that was a plain case fer arbitration
Nobody wanted war. We might lest as
well submitted tho question TO peace
tribunal We'd formulate the aues-
ton this way.
Did one or more than one Spaniard
blow up the Maine"
That would settled a pint that
want settled tall by that notorious AM
hilarious war. There's nuthin' like ar
hllratiou to settle questions % diffrunce
fair an hon'rahle an with due regard
fer the rights Of all consumed"
Eph crooked a finger in the direction
OF the bartender, who came promptly.
They've hen other things. lots OF
en-, that We amt done right" he re-
sumed hut this is the fust time in our
hlsiry that any man In public life has
felt called on TO apol gize fer the Amer
lean ReVlution. Heretofore we'd allus
kinda felt that the Revolution was sort
q exempt from criticism by American s ::
that is, when viewed as national
policy Wed allus pointed to It with
pride, feelin' coClNsure we want ever
Ia Inv nft fa.N
"Rut now things has changed Nov
we've become 30 all fired cultured an
refined that We got 70 deny our origin.
Yves, sir henceforth We got TO speaS
OF Concord an Lexington in a whisper
an hush the mouth OF any blatant lingo
that goes round talkin' OF Washington
or PAU Jones. We can think OF Jeffer-
son an Adams an John Hancock as
respectable citizens. hut let It end thar,
Never connect EN- with a certain docy-
ment which shall be nameless. fer fear
Yen offend some foreign Power. II
anybody asks ye how We gained our in
dependence refuse to answer on the
ground that it'll tend 10 incrimlnate an
degrade We"
"Don't get excited" I warned they'll
unveil that monument just the same
and ! haven't a doubt there will he
enough oratory 10 satisfy the most fiery
p"trlot IN the state I'd like 10 be
there myself"
wouldn't" growled Eph; I'D hate
TO be thar worse n any place In the
world"
Why" ! inquired
"Bekuz,' he replied, his eyes snap
ping, the shade of Nathaniel Greene
might take notion TO visit the spot
an II 1t did II would look round at the
thousands of upturned faces an il would
near the bands playin', an the people,
shoutin' and see the flags a-wavin' an
the spirit Of the ole hero might be hrash
enun to ask Where Is the President of
tho United States?' and then some one
would have to speak up an say: why.
Gen'ru he didn't come he was afeared
OF onendin' the British Government
SIMON CREEL.
ALBANY, January 30.