The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1915-08-19
Wayside MeditatiOns
By "Optn0"
subiet Silent yHumor

the part of our inhabitants to secure
the privilege? of presentation at
COURT in fact it is more often than
! not, thru lack of effort on our part
that such presentation is brot about.
Our city" is decidedly cosmo-
politian. We have Ivan Great Big
Sneezovitch. Wa Hoo La La-Man-
afraid-of-the-pen, Moses Hezekiah
Absolum Brown the Won Frankforts.
the Van Liverworsts and represen-
tatives of other nations too numerous
to mention. 1t is worthy of note
that however much you stroll around
the streets of our city" you are
never accosted by the . genus hobo"
that is, unless he is under cover
and disguised as one of the brother
hood" However that may be, we
are never troubled with him in his
mendicant form; nor with that seedy
looking individual whose Open Sc
same" to your sympathy and purse,
lis the presentation of a union card
and whose "Shibboleth" of exist
ence is voiced in these words, DO
you recognize union MANI" The
fact is, he is like unto great num-
Der of Christians(?) in this, that
you would not recognize them as
Christians, or him as union man. If
it were not for the fact that they
each were willing to "own up" to
it. There are no saloons in our
city," neither are there any blind
pigs" in fact strong drink of any
kind is taboo.
Our chapel services is free from
many of the annoyances incident to
most church services. The Chap
lain is not disturbed by the con-
fusion caused by late arrivals, nor.
by the departure of some anxious
housewife who is in haste to get
home and prepare special Sunday
feast. On the contrary the entire
congregation remains until the con-
clusion of the services. And even
then there is none of that standing
around in the aisles, avidly che wing
over the latest morsel of gossip;
a custom all too prevelant in
outside churches. Our theatre
also has a magnificent attendance.
do not recall performance that l
have attended, when there were less
than 1000 persons in attendance.
The citizenry have the best seats,
the. parquette and the dress circle
being reserved by mine host" for
them. The plebian outsider who
has not the d1stinction(?) of being
a resident IN our city" must 90
away back and sit down. in the
balcony. Our theatre management
is to be commended for their strict
ruling: hats off, thus, and for other
reasons we are given a fine and un-
obstructed view of the stage. No
large picture" hats or egregious
French coiffures to annoy us. No
coat and hat room attendants to tip.
no taxi driver to drive us forty
blocks farther than necessary just
for the opportunity OF outrageously
overcharging us. In fact we are in
no wise troubled by the multitude
of petty annoyances that harass our
plebian and more or less urbane
brethren beyond our city: limits.
They often times describe cratic
and uncertain Wanderlngs in their
perigrinatlons to and fro, and
many times they must depend upon
uncertain information from unreli-
able sources is their efforts to reach
given point; not so with us, for
even the most humble and insig.
nifcant of our guests are accord
ed the honor" of a uniformed at
tendant in personally conducted
tour"
Among other pleasant features
of our model city" is our weekly
paper; a clean sheet of no mean
n