Virginia free press. (Charlestown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1832-1916, 1915-07-01
COULDN'T FOOL HOBO
KNIGHT OF the ROAD WAS wlsE
OLD BIRD.
Billy Sunday Tells Good Story Of How
Farmer Stopped Visits Of
TrampS- Suspicious
Of Emusivs Welcome.

Billy Sunday, the evangelist, said at
fashionable reception in his honor
in Philadelphia:
"A good many people are mistrust-
ful Of religion. | don't know why It
is. but there's a lot Of people as mis-
trustful Of religion and the religious
as the tramp was mistrustful Of the
farmer.
"T don't know what to do about
this tramp evil, a farmer once said to
me. I've put up. signs about bewar:
ing of the man trap and look out for
the savage dog and take care Of the
spring gun, but it don't seem to do
any good ct all, Mr.. Sunday. The
tramps modest me something ter.
rible.'
Well, Brother Brown said l. 'you
just put up big sign reading, "All
tramps welcomed at Browns and
then, later on, let me know the result.
Brown thought was joking at FIRST,
but when he saw / was in earnest he
went straight OF home and put up =
big sign over his gate-'All tramps
welcome here, John Brown that you
could read half mile away.
Il met him again the following
year. He said the sign had worked
. like miracle. Ever since he put it
up he had only set eyes on one tramp
and that had been by accident. He
came on the tramp accidentally as
the fellow stood under the sign, look
ing up at 1t and reading 1t over and
over with a kind Of quizzical sarcas.
tic smile playing about his mouth.
Hello!' says Farmer Brown, grin.
ming over the fence at the tramp
very friendly.
The tramp sneered. Then he burst
into bitter laugh and said:
Hello, mister. How many cops
have you got hidden In there?
Why, none-none at all" says
Farmer Brown, in a hurt, surprised
voice.
1.-THE tramp gave another bitter
laugh. How many bulldogs have you
got, then, mister?'
There amt dog about the place.
says the farmer. He opened the gate
little ways, but the tramp jumped
back, SO scared like, the farmer closed
1t again cut Of pity, You can come
in and see for yourself II. you don't
believe me about the dogs he says.
"tOh, yes, know said the tramp.
He was pale and shaking all over
from the start he got when the gate
opened. I know an about that he
said; but tell me how many bear
traps you've got sset in there that
would bite poor fellows leg on
Nary bear trap, said the farm
er Nary bear trap
Has a man got to do hard days
work to get measly meal Of scraps?
burst out the tramp.
Nothing Of the Kind, said the
farmer. You come right in, young fel
low, and I'll give you three-course
hot supper for nothing, and If you
want to stay all night we'll fix you UP
warm bed on the floor by the kitch-
en- fire.
THE tramp stared hard at the farm
er minute and then he smiled kind
Of plying, patronizing smile and
said:
+" You. can't work that little game
on me. This is my eleventh year on
the road
What gamer said Farmer
Brown. What game are you talkin
about?
Putin rough on rats in the cot
fee and sellin' our remains to the
medical college for dollar apiece
said the tramp, winking at the farm
er. oh, no, Brownie. old boy! Oh,
my, no! Not on your life! Ha, ha,
ha! Aber! This is my eleventh year
on. the road, I'm tellin' you
And the tramp took a cigar butt
from the pocket OF his ragged coat,
lit it with sulphur match, and
strutted jauntily away, his head near
ly hidden in big smoke clouds"