davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1915-07-29
TYPOGRAPHICAL Errors.

Every week this paper, and every
other paper in the community, has
number of errors-typographical
and otherwise. That's one of the rea-
sons good many people think the
editor should have been a black
smith. But what of the editors view
point? If there's one thing better cal
culated to turn rosy youth to dodder.
old age than, for instance, to get
death notices and weather predic-
tons mixed so that the darned thing
comes out in the paper Mrs Will
lam Williams died last night. She
has gone where it is lie degrees
in the shade and with rising temp
erature tomorrow" well-we'd like
to know what it is. Maybe you think
it pleasant to walk down the street
and hear some grinning idiot with a
head like an added egg holding up
the sheet to caustic criticism and
the editor to CONSCIOUSNESS scorn!
Maybe you think it nice to hear
some member of the vacuum family
remark that the editor must make
up his paper with shovel! Or some
Pinhead Percy wonder why the
editor dosen't learn how to set type!
No doubt you think it excruciatingly
delicious when an item announcing
that Miss Merry Merryvale is to be
led to the altar gets into the paper
as lied by halterl" Funny, isn't it?
Yes it is! 1t depends on the point of
view. Some people may think par
alyzed man with the itch is the
height of ridiculous, but what does
the paralyzed man think about it?
We are all apt to make mistakes.
Don't forget that. What would you
think if the editor put some of your
mistakes into the paper? Remember
when-,who shaves himself, came
to church with fine patch of
whiskers on his chin which he had
overlooked? And when Miss-let
the shoe string on her switch hang
down her back? And how Elder -
caught the tail of his long coat over
the neck of the bottle in his hind
pocket and went down the street
showing that sometimes the strong
est in faith are weakest in the flesh?
But we have no intention of telling
these things. AS editor we wouldn't
be much ola hair-pin if we were bent
that way. Just remember, though,
that we are all prone to errors,
and the next time you see something
in the paper which you regard as a
sure sign ofthe editors feeble mind
edness, just say the devil did It, and
by heck, we'll back you up.
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1915-07-29
Its Advantage.

There is one big advantage the
gardener has in his graft over all
other kinds"
What is that?"
He can always get the public to
swallow it."
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1915-07-29

Buy your Travellers Checks a
Monroe City Bank for your summer
trip. Cashed ! anywhere without
Identification 7-22
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1915-07-29

A Chicago Department store ad-
verrises Summer dress, one half
off," We saw woman on the
streets of Monroe City in one of
the contraptions and it did not
seem to fiji anywhere. Better buy
at home.
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1915-07-29
For Rent.

A nice S room cottage with good
barn, all in fine condition, on good
street. Close in. Enquire of
H. Levy.
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1915-07-29

Buy your Travellers Checks at
Monroe City Bank for your summer
trip. Cashed anywhere without
Identification. 1922
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1915-07-29

Mexico seems to be able to keep
in the public press, even though
she is supposed to be busted.
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1915-07-29

Carpenter Work Wanted.
Done by contract or by day in
town or country. Call or see A L.
Cruiser. Bell phone SO. tt.
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1915-07-29

Palm Beach suits cleaned and
pressed for rs cents.-Lane the
ailor.
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1915-07-29

The drouth has certainly been
broken to queens taste. Liable
to break some of the rest of us too.
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1915-07-29

The C. B. & O.. continues to i'm
prove (?) the town.
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1915-07-29

And the great Chicago disaster
will not prevent people from taking
chances on the steamers.
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1915-07-29

And we will have few paved
streets before many moons.
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1915-07-29

What are we going to do for
pretzels if Germany goes under?
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1915-07-29

1t is wise man who keeps his
mouth shut abont how wise he is,
or how good he is and how rich
he is.
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1915-07-29

DR.. Hornback Oculist and Aurist
Hanni bal, Mo.
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1915-07-29

We know not the hour nor the
day when we may be called to face
our maker. Best prepare for the
tourney.
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1915-07-29

Some folks had best be a little
careful as the law is looking at
them.
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1915-07-29

Best pay your bills the first Of
the month before they grow larger.
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1915-07-29

Who Pays? The steamship CON-
pany should have to, but will
they?
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1915-07-29

The weed cutting was good this
week.
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1915-07-29

And the circus is still going.
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1915-07-29

Have that suit cleaned by Lane
the Tailor If
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1915-07-29
For Sale.

Several good residence properties
at bargains, good terms.
A. S. Jayne & Son.
Monroe City Democrat. (Monroe City, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1915-07-29

THURSDAY. JULY go. 1915
Omaha daily bee., 1915-04-07
"omahas Greatest Need.

A section Of the omaha Noman's club de.
voted an afternoon to hearing discussion by
several hobby-riders OF the question What is
Omaha's greatest need?" The replies to the
question we're in all but one instance an eabora.
tiou OF some one OF the several reforms that
have been harped upon for long time and
with no other effect than TO keep the champion
in the public prints.
II must appear TO stranger, reading al
omaha paper in which is published report OF
these meetings, that the city is indeed in sad
way. Our citizenship in general is attacked; we
are told We have no civic conscience. that our
business men are moral towards, that our Off
cials are venal. and that our men OF means and
affairs are corruptionists, Omaha is pictured
as reeking with vice, and menaced continually
by an organization OF crime too horrd TO be
told, that our homes are poorly managed and
that we are in the very last stages OF moral and
physical decadence.
All OF which is pure bosh. What Omaha
really needs is surcease from the everlasting
blAckwashing It has received from zealots. and
a little more attention paid TO the woman who
was brave enough to sound amid the general
mourning optimistic note Omaha is a beau
tful place TO live city OF homes OF schools
and OF churches where good abounds, where
life and property secure, where culture ami
good morals prevail generally and where the in
dustrious and thrifty may reap great reward
for their effort as anywhere in all the world.
Omaha needs most the constructive co-opera-
tion OF all its people.
Omaha daily bee., 1915-04-07
A Correction. Please

Commenting on presidential prospects at
this long-advance range, Mark sullivan, the edl
tor of Golfers. declares that he has made a de.
tailed Investigation OF all primary laws affect
ing presidential nomination on the statute books
OF any OF the states and that they are negligible
because only two OF them, Maryland and ILL.,
nois. provide for primary vote on the names
of candidates for presidential nomination.
Whether negligible or not. Mr.. sullivan must
have overlooked Nebraska, because in this state,
we have already pointed out, not only is the
preferential vote provided for both president
and vice president but the names may be put on
the primary ballot without even a by-your-leave
Of the person directly concerned although by a
forced construction withdrawal is permitted
within specified time limits True. there is
nothing TO compel convention delegate TO vote
his instructions. or TO continue to vote them
longer than he sees fit. a. was demonstrated at
Baltimore when Mr.. Bryan got away from the
preference vote for Champ Clark. But this con-
dition is shared equally by delegates instructed
by convention. The point TO be remembered is
that direct primary states like Nebraska can go
on record for any favored presidential nominee
whom the rank and file of the respective parties
may desire unless the particular candidate takes
himself out of the running by demanding that
his name be erased from the ballot
Omaha daily bee., 1915-04-07
R.iterntinr the Protest.

The Identical note Of the United states t.
England and France. relative to the ocean-wide
blockade promulgated by the allies Ia perfectly
calculated TO preserve the rishts OF the United
states in the matter 81 subsequently prosecnt-
ins claims for reparatiou against the govern
ments Of the countries addressed on behalf Of
aggrievcd American shippers. At the same time
formal claim Is made against Germany for ac-
tual damages due the owners for the destruc-
ton OF the Frye
That Is about as Tar as the United states or
any other neutral government can go. short OF
rctauatorv action. 80 sign exists OF inclination
on the part or either OF the belligerents to pa'
any attention TO the rights OF ncutrals. The coo-
ditIon is remarkable. but, FOR the matter OF that,
the war has been one continual succession oi
remarkable incidents With total disregard Tor
the rights or feelings OF anybody, save as the
selfish interests ~ the combatants are involved.
The doctrine that the end justifies the means
has been applied without modification in all tn
operations ~ the conflict.
ENCOURAGEMENT for Americans is found In
tho temperate language Of the note, which is
essentially firm, and fairly states position that
will always be tenable, because it is founded on
principles OF exact Justice.
Omaha daily bee., 1915-04-07
The Pullman Portsr,s Tin.

Just what relation may exist between the
tips collected by the Pullman porter and the high
cost OF living and social unrest is beyond NOR
tai ken, Maybe the Commission on Industrial
Relations will develop something that might be
twisted into comparison of the coin dropped
by the disturbed traveller into the waiting hand
OF the porter and the eXtortions practiced by tho
owners OF the ear AT any rate, the tip to the
porter seems an insignificant evil The travel
ing public may object TO 1t, but apparently not n
seriousness, for the custom has persisted from
the beginning and never more firmly en-
trenched than Il is today.
The travelling public is much more concerned
over the high fares charged for berths than
over the tips to the porter More interest is
felt in the matter OF accommodations afforded,
which have been considerably restricted in late
years cleanliness and ventilation OF the cars ar
much more vital 10 the people Who are forced
by circumstances TO ride in sleepers: and mary
other points for inquiry Of greater importance
than the matter Of tips might be enumerated
The money given TO George" in the morn
ing is the smallest item in the bill OF grievances
the travelling public has against The Pullman
Palace car monopoly
Omaha daily bee., 1915-04-07
Editorial SiftingS

Boston Transcript: 4 Washington
strap-hanger has been given a verdict Of
N,oOO because a motorman called him
boob" but IL a strap-hanger isn't a
boob what on earth Is he?
Cleveland Plain Dealer: A French can
non has been mentioned in an order OF
the day for gallantry on the field OF
action. Don't laugh For what is the
soldier but a machine Of destruction
Baltimore American: Now. the Turks
want Uncle sam 20 protect Constantinople
from destruction. The first rule Of
safety adopted BY all the nations is,
When in doubt that ANYTHING else will
do any good, yell for help TO the United
States
New York Post: The Turkish COM
nander who reiterated from the Suez re-
ports that he shifted the forces from
the field. leaving the enemy nothing but
bodies Of our revered martyrs" Ma
poIeon's mastery retreat rom Russia did
no more.
Houston Post: Houston. Of course.
knows Colonel House and his chRrag-
teristics. so II il not improper 20 inform
the outsiders who are trying 10 guess his
mission in Europe that they will get no
bunch from him. Colonel House has
never lost control % his conversational
apparatus
Philadelphia Ledger: Going up. A week
ago. according 10 Premier Asquith. the
cost OF the war was about SISoO0.GIO a
day. Now the secretary Of the imperial
treasur7, OF Germany puts Il at So, on. 90
a week. Anyhow. IL il costing more than
the money in the world amounts 70. and
there will be a deuce OF time paying for
tiff il ever b. done.
New York World Accepting the theory
OF the attorneys OF the Rock Island that
the gentlemen who recently financed It
70 ruin were guilty o. nothing worse than
a mistake Of Judgment it will have
10 be admitted that their mistake" was
an unusual one. To date IL amounts 10
about SSS',Olo0oO dead loss Not al OF
/ this came out OF the pockets o. investors,
! but a good deal OF il did.
Springfield Republican That Charles
/ N. SchVab is a successful steel manu-
. facturer in competition with the steel
trust must be admitted His Bethlehem
( steel corporation earned n per cent for
. its common stock in the fiscal rear ended
! December 81. last despite the fact that
as late as September AIr. SchVsb de-
/ clsred that the steel industry was m the
worst condition that had ever been s1-
| periencsd
Omaha daily bee., 1915-04-07
GRINs AND ORGANS.

Ethel used to play good deal in sun
day school, but one day she had been 50
good that the teacher said in praise.
Ethel. my dear. YOU have been very
good giri today
"Yeth M responded Ethel - couldn {
help a. J dot stiff neck. Pitts hurch
Chronicle.
"Wouldn YOU try to get q divorce
from a woman who abused YOU and neg
lectcd your home and thought more Of
her CLUB than she did OF you:' Numbered
the big man.
II don't think / would" replied Henry
Peck II am afraid Henrietta would not
let me. '-lhiladel phia Ledger
Professor searching vainiy FOR his
socksl-l have places where I keen my
things and YOU ought to know u
Mrs.-A ourc right. / ought to know
Wh"r" YOU keep your late hours.-Cali-
iurnia Pelican
Wife tauErilyl-Just look at the time
This nurning you got home at 2 clock
and here u Is again after midnight.
husband We'll. YOU know. my dear. a. 3
against my rule to come home twice the
same tay.-Boston Transcript.
no you suppose We shall o,"r have
UNIVERSAL peace
Hardly. | fancy marriage Will never
tc entirely Hhol shed. Judge
Omaha daily bee., 1915-04-07
6Mls7z%4sseN
AN Aky "a cau4k&


Early election returns are close with Boyd Lead
ina Murphy for mayor.
AR Graham p. Browne and Miss Carrie Robbins
united In marriage al Trinity cathedral. The
reference 70 Mr. Browne says his quite our
Of the ordinary: that four nve years ago ne
bought number % tine bred chickens. which have
been cared for and added TO- taking prizes al fairs
until he has amassed comfortable bit Of wealth
John T. Raymond put "Colorel Mulberry Sellers
onto the stage Al Boyds iu his inimitSble way.
Word received o. the dea IN at Cherokee, la,
Of Robert r. MeAusiahd OF this city, lie had been
with the Omaha National bank seventeen wears
Another out-Of-toWn death which Is announced Is
that Of Mrs NJ. n Goole, Occurring at Las Negss,
where she had some with consumption.
l. L Smith. the Farnam dry goods mer-
chant gave his employees a thsater party az Boyd's
last night engastng whole section for that purpose
Mr. smith occupied the end seat IN the first an
his right his gentecl manager. N T. hoies and
next 70 him Fred Fuller. the cashier.
William Weckbach presented BY the Omaha
Aaennerchor with gold medal beautifully engraved
With the emblems Of the order.
Omaha daily bee., 1915-04-07
The wrong shin.

summer had come, and the sea captains wife was
accompanying her husband across the ocean And il
CHANGED also that the owners sister making the
trip She WAS a strong-mnded woman and the wife
Of the captain. knowing the argumentatve nature OF
her husband. saw serious trouble ahead.
Wherefore. she warned him that, when at meals.
II She thought he approaching dangerous ground
she would give him polite reminder by kicking him
on the shin.
But. alas, her reminder passed uuheeded though
her kicks sew harder and harder. And one day she
kicked vigorously than ever.
The shadow OF pain passed across the face OF the
mate, who sat opposite her.
Oh Mr.. Boldly" she said, I'm sorry. but vas
that your Shin
Yes. Mrs Brown" replied the mate msekly, ITS
been my shin all the voyage. ma sm!'-Pittshurgh
Chronicle telegraph.
Omaha daily bee., 1915-04-07
People and Events

Little Margsret Stoner Of Long Island, /. years
old, never used baby talk and speaks eight
Possessed Of the gft OF tongues she wants
10 be an editor doubtless Of the foreign exchange de-
pa7tment
An increasing number OF women in England are
drilling for reserve army designed 10 repel invasion.
Thousands are already enrolled in auxiliary police
forces The training received viii be exceeding
suffrage.
The street carmen's strike al Springfield. MaSs
last brought the titney the front strike
breaker soon after the men quit a flock Of motor
cars came on did transport business
for txo days hAndiiy that public sympathy went
IN IN the ard abandoned Jobs threatened to 20 the
same route Both sides then dotted their fools C -
and agreed 10 srhitrste
Omaha daily bee., 1915-04-07
At Once! Pape's Diapepsin Stops
Indigestion, Gas, Sour Stomach

Time It, In a few minutes all stomach
distress some No Indigestion. heartburn,
sourncss or belching Of gas, acid, or
quotations Of undigested food, no diZEi-
ness. bloating. foul breath or headache.
Pare Diapepsin is noted for its speed
in regulating upset stomachs. II is the
surest quickest stomach doctor in the
whole world. and besides. it is harmless.
Millions OF men and women now eat
their fayorite foods without fear they
know 1t is needless to have bad stomach.
Get a large fifty-lent case OF Pape's
Omaha daily bee., 1915-04-07
RaIsInE HALLWAY Rntes.

NORTH LOTP. Neb.. April 6-To the
Editor OF The Bee. There is now a very
numerous discussion throughout the ma
tion on the subject OF increasing railway
rates and car fare Since having begun
the discussion the American people are
finding that railway capital stock is an
uncertain quantity. The acts OF the rail
way management in spending hundreds OF
millions Of dollars IN terminals for the
principal reason Of increasing the value Of
real estate in the great centers OF popu-
lation where the high financie-s have ex-
tensive investments. is a subject that
should not be overlooked by the public.
Why is there any cause for asking an
increase of rates At this time? What is
the remedS2
In the primary campaign in Nebras ska
in 1914 We saw the spectacle Of a man
running for railway commissioner who
acted the part Of progressive. but more
recently we see him pushing a bill in the
legislature by which no city in Nebra ska
may establish any sort OF municipal en-
terprtse without the consent of the rail-
way commission. The court which fixes
interstate rates is the Interstate Com
merCe commission. appointed 10y the
president How many of you remember
the incident year ago where Senator
La Toilette violently opposed an ap-
pointee OF the president for a position on
that commission? That appointee had an
Infamous corporation record in New Jer-
sey. How may the people expect Justice
on the freight rate subject when we
know that the personnel of the commits
sion has been hand picked by the rail
ways. which ask the increase i'm rates
There used to be a man roaming over this
continent whom We called a silver-tonEued
orator and from his speeches YOU would
think that were he ever to get in power
corporation malefactOrs of all colors
would be prosecuted to the limit Now he
tells Us that railway securities should be
as good as government bonds. \ word OF
the president would change the personnel
Of that commission and hence the contro-
Versy OF freight rates would cease II the
citizenship OF the country would write
the president a plain business letter,
maybe that commission would lose their
jobs. Write TODAY.
WALTER JOHNSON.
Omaha daily bee., 1915-04-07
THE BROADER VIEW.

\ traveller Yes. rvf paused while
For steea the hill. and distant still the
Here. heath Tsi, this old tree. sheltered from
I'm looking back upon the way I've come.
The road was much too short. Id just
To understand HES secrets. Now, its
I've rSa s.bcd tac journeys end Beyond
The outer edges OF eternity
l have not gained the heights for which
There is yet much I cannot understand.
So many tasks commenced are still uu-
And others J had hoped FOR not begun.
There are SO many words failed to say;
So many chan ,Cs that 7 threw away
To lend u helpns hand to fellow mon,
see II nov; ! did not see 1T then.
I.rou my own affairs was intent:
I ,lid not notice now my brother bent
Beneath the weight Il burdens that ]
With Just a kindly word have rendered
light
Now l must Yield my place to one who
No knowledge Of the pitfalls in lifc's path.
And he i'm turn will from the race retire
Fer he has reached the goal OF his
desire.
Could VIC bu, live through all the years
again.
With knowledge We have gained, think
you. that when
Our fece uron tie earth al last was run
We'd be cyntcrted with the lal<,r done
I DO not know We live and work and
rest
And do on, Glty as We see it best.
How weak that best Is, no one ever knew.
Till looking Tack. ho gets the hrosdcr
view DAVID.
Omaha
Omaha daily bee., 1915-04-07

and get. him to propose an elopement--
Judge.
II lad forty acres OF wheat so bad ON
me +" said the old farmer and also
ten acres Of rye. But believe III MAKE
up them losses and pull out profit yet
''How's that
.,Jist cent twelve quarts Of early straw
berries 20 market, by heck. '-EouisNiIe
COurier-JOUrn
with but three minutes 70 catch bis
train. the travelling man inquired " The
street car conductor Cant YOU 60 fastrr
than thisT'
Yes" the hell-rinEer replied hut 7
have to stay with my car -Harpers
Magazine.
Omaha daily bee., 1915-04-07
Twice Told Tales


The handsome young minister always stationed
himself at church door after the service in order
TO greet his Pensioners they filed out.
one Sabbath morning along came Swedish
maid. a stranger so, with his usual cordiaty, the
minister grasped her hand and said:
II very glad to you here this morning.
WIZ YOU not tell your name and address, that
may call you soon?'
The maid looked him coldy in the eye and, with
drawing her hand replied:
Il tank you. but got one steady fella already;
he come twice a week, and l tank he like you to
come '-HArpers Magazine. ~ .
Omaha daily bee., 1915-04-07

Diapepsin from any drug store and put
your stomach right. stop being m,sCr-
able - life is too short-you're not here
long so make your stay agreeable. Eat
what you like and digest it; enjoy it.
without fear OF rebellion in the stomach.
Pape's Diapepsin belongs in your home.
Should one Of the family cat something
which doesn't agree with them, or i'm case
OF an attack of indigestion, dyspepsia,
gastritis or stomach arrangement, it is
handy to give instant relef.-Advertise-
ment
Omaha daily bee., 1915-04-07
MnrLinr the Rnhr.

When the bottom fell out OF a recent real estate
boom in a southwestern state the desire 20 get nd
Of the property great as it had been 10 a.
quiye H.
one day a lawyer while travelling along the co1n-
try road old friend his wesrily but happily
leading a reluctant toward town. Inquiry ellie
tied the information that he acquired the in eN-
change Tor city LOT.
And do you know" said the owner OF the COW.
'aughirE I Jest turned trick with that old rube
tie cant read a word and in the deed worked off
rNo lots on him instead OF one. New York Times