davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Crittenden record-press. [volume] (Marion, Ky.) 1909-191?, 1915-01-21

LEAKS
by F. s. LLOYD:

Simon Heath says we have to give
women credit for one thing. A man vii
do more growing over stomach ach
than woman will over a hard spell o
sickness.
Albert Elder was reading in a maya
zine, and said to his wife, "Grace, l
have found an article.on How to avoid
war"
What does it say?"
Remain single" he replied.
A Justice Of The Peace at Flat Rock
was called on to decide case. The
Counsel for both sides made their long
and eloquent speeches, after all the
facts had been elected from the wit
nesses. "Prisona discharged" said
Jim Cliff. 'The hull accusation is
done been based on dinged technical
ity."
Albert Elder said, 81 gave my wife
a rainbow kiss when left home this
morning."
What in the world is a rainbow
kiss?"
lone that follows a Storm"
Miss Matte Smith was asked, "Why
did you throw him over at the last
minute9"
"He wanted to buy set of dining
loom furniture instead Of an engage
ment ring"
A young man said to John Warner
Travis. "Sir, your daughter ha:
promised to become my wife,"
"Well, don't come to me for sympa
thy. you might know something would
happen to you hanging around her'
five nights in a week."
Dan Patton was asked, what d,
you think Of man with rip in IN
coat and only three buttons on hi
vest?"
"Well. he should either get marie,
or get a divorce"
Tom Yandell stepped to Gopher
restaurant for a lunch one busy ds
and called for some steak, said. "wai,
er. this knife is dull and the steak /
like leather" How would it do :
strop the knife on the steak. sir?"
Crittenden record-press. [volume] (Marion, Ky.) 1909-191?, 1915-01-21

Mrs. Guy Lamb accompanied
by her parents DR.. and Mrs. A.
}. Driskill arrived home from
Denver Colorado thursday morn
ing. She stood the trip very well
Few people knew she was ex-
pected but all her friends are
glad she is well enough to come
home and hope she may contin-
ue to improve.
Crittenden record-press. [volume] (Marion, Ky.) 1909-191?, 1915-01-21
Monday. April I2th. 1915.
County Court Day, is Lmpie-
menf Day al
I. Il. Cochran & Co.
The Builder Oh The Peace Palace.

Andrew Carnegie in a recent
interview on peace, said to a
New York reporter.
A lad of twenty killed a man
and woman in Serajevo. All
Europe is now fighting to avenge
this wrong. England alone is
spending s35, 600 a minute, &C
cording to Sidney Webb, on
gunpowder.
Well this is such an expensive
way to avenge a wrong that Il
reminds me Of the man at the
banquet.
A man entered the cloak room
at the end of the banquet, and
began to smash in silk hat after
silk hat.
Hold on, boss Wot TO you
smashin' all dem high hats? de-
manded the attendant.
I'm looking for my own, the
gentleman answered. It's an
opera hat - collapsible you know
None of these seem to be il.
Crittenden record-press. [volume] (Marion, Ky.) 1909-191?, 1915-01-21

Not Bear My Burdens Alone"
after they quit, he kept on sing
ing it louder and more beautiful
than ever before.
May God bless and save the
bereaved family, for Christ's
sake, Mrs. M. c. GILL.
Crittenden record-press. [volume] (Marion, Ky.) 1909-191?, 1915-01-21
See Mcconnell & Virgins and
SPECS the hair cutter.

See Mcconnell x Virgins and
SPECS the hair cutter.
All shirts l0cts no extra charg-
es for the agent with Metcalfs
Laundry. Enoch Fritts Agents.
There are rumors of a double
wedding in which a prominent
family will lose two beautiful
daughters in the early spring.
Cheapest and best laundry in
town. Quickest service, Metcalf
Laundry Co.
Enoch Frits Agent
FOR SALE-A jersey male
calf ready for service.
Address Box s,
Marion, Ky.
+. b. Franklin Of this city and
Eula Threlkeld Of Crsyne attend
ed the burial of Mrs. K. Z,
Threlkeld at Union Friday.
Greed A. Taylor attended the
funeral and burial Of his aunt
Mrs. K. 4. Threlkeld at Union
Friday.
Rev. w. r. Gibbs has been
called to Deer Creek Church anC
will preach there the 9th. Sun
dcy. Every member is inviteC
and expected to be present.
Uucle Dock Green. wishes L
call the attention of the readers
of the Record.Press to the fact
that il takes mart man to re
hearse a story just as it was told
Mr.. and Mrs. Henry Hughes
on the Piney road near the VII
son Hill are rejoicing over tn
arrival of a 10 pound boy at thei
home. 1t is especially interes,
ing as their daughter Pearl VIII
was their Only childis now in he
l4th., year.
Senator Johnson N. Candle
sent to the editor a large lot Q
garden seeds for free distribu
ton among the farmers, Senate
Camden is a friend OF the pee
pie. Come and get yours.
Judge T. j. Mum left Mon
day for Louisville to visit h
daughter Mrs. George M Eady
After a short visit there he wi
20 to Frankfort to visit his 80
Judge C. S. Mum Of the coul
of appeals.
Judge J. +. Gordon who
holding court at Wickliffr, Ky
was here Sunday the guest {
his wife who is visiting at II
home of her parents Mr.. an
Mrs. l.. II. James on corn,
Depot and College streets.
Mrs J. F. Gordon Of Madison
vile arrived last week to loC
after some business here for h
father who is i'll in Louisville al
under treatment for rheumat
and optic troubles.
Crittenden record-press. [volume] (Marion, Ky.) 1909-191?, 1915-01-21
Monday. April I2fh. 1915,
9TH, Annual Implement Day.
7. Il. Cochran & Co.
Christmas Offer On Diction.
airy May Be Renew ed.

Our Dictionary offer made in
December and good till Christ.
mas may be renewed during
1915. II any are interested and
will so report to us we will az.
certain and let them know later.
The Crittenden Record Press.
Crittenden record-press. [volume] (Marion, Ky.) 1909-191?, 1915-01-21

Monday, April 18th, 1915,
We inDife The farmers of old
Criffenden and adjoining
counties 10 come 10 our
store and see the best line
of implements eDer shown
in this end of the state.
I. II. Cochran & Co.
Crittenden record-press. [volume] (Marion, Ky.) 1909-191?, 1915-01-21
Come 10 Marion, Monday.
April I2fh, 1915. II wW be
the biggest day in the year.
7. II. Cochran & Co.
Card Of Thank.

We wish to extend our heart.
felt thanks to the many friends,
who so kindly administered to us
in the sickness and death of our
dear wife and mother.
May Gods choicest blessings
rest upon you all.
w. B. Davis and family,
Crittenden record-press. [volume] (Marion, Ky.) 1909-191?, 1915-01-21

Cues Old Sores. OTTER Ienodlo W,n't Gu.
she worst cases. no matter OF how lonI standing,
are cured by the wonderful. cd riiable u.
Portsr's Antiseptic Healing OIL II re,Seves
-s,u and Heals at the same TIM &c. Soc, -
Bonners Ferry herald. [volume] (Bonners Ferry, Idaho) 1904-current, 1915-06-25

en- of Tommys father as being one of
the brave men who had died for the
country.
When the crackers and torpedoes
were exploded, and Tommy was turn
ing back toward the gate. Roy caught
him protestingly by the arm.
Look here, Tommy" he cried; you
mustn't leave us this way. We're go
ing to have a game of croquet. and
then mamma will have lunch for us in
the summer house. After that we'd
like to have you in our carriage in the
parade. l know papa will be pleased.
He said your father was in his COM
pany. and that he was one of the best
men. It's right that you should be
in the parade. And we'd like to have
you go with us to the fireworks this
evening, too. Papa has charge of them,
you know, and maybe he'll let us help
little"
So Tommy remained and played GRO
Quet, and had lunch with them in the
summer house, and went with them in
the parade
Then he hurried home and told his
mother about it. but returned in time
to help carry the fireworks to the
square in front Of the courthouse. and
to assist in placing skyrockets and
mines and pin wheels in position for
firing, and to do many of those impor-
tant things, which so delight the heart
of a boy.
And his conspicuous position in the
proceedings of the day so impressed
the other boys that they ceased to jeer
him from that time on, and took him
into their games as a comrade in
good standing
Bonners Ferry herald. [volume] (Bonners Ferry, Idaho) 1904-current, 1915-06-25
ONE FOURTH He
REALLY Enjoyed
fommy's Fme of Happiness
That Stayed With Him for
Many Days.

"Sh-s-wee; sh-s-weel" squeaked the
saw. as 1t gnawed its way slowly into
knotty limb.
1t was a hot day. and the saw was
dull, and the boy was a mite OF fell
low.
"Sh-s-wee; sh-s-weel' And all the
while the thoughts of the boy we're
surging out to the other boys, who
were exploding torpedoes and crackers
on the village streets, and to the big
parade at midday and the fireworks
in the evening.
AS soon as this limb and three 9th
ers were done. he would be free to 60
He looked at them critically, and cal
culated how long it would take.
He would not have any torpedoes or
crackers to explode, but he could look
at those of the other boys and listen
to the noise. And it would not mater
so very much if they did laugh az hi
clothes. Fourth of July didn't coma
very often, and he could stand a littl1
jeering for the pleasure of the holt
day.
He did not feel any pity for himself,
or think it hard that he must go into
the woods every morning to gather
limbs, and then spend the greater part
of each day cutting them into convent
ent pieces for the stove; but he did
feel sorry that his mother could not
spare half day from her washing an
ironing, or even time to go out with
him to listen to the delightful snap
ping of the torpedoes and crackers
At last there was sufficient wood for
the day, and with bounding heart but
shrinking form he stole along the side
walks, watching and listening eagerly
though keeping himself as much as
possible in the background. Up and
down one street after another he
moved, finally pausing at a yard that
was delightfully."- noisy with explosives
The tight board fence was too high
to peep over without raising himself
on tiptoes, but the gate was several
inches lower. Here he stopped and
caught his breath at sight of a boy
holding a lighted match to a giant
cracker.
The boy was Roy Green, the doctors
son, and with him we're Bobby and
baby Edith. He knew them all by
sight, and his eyes shone with admi
ration at the cool composure with
which Roy was doing his lighting.
He had never been spoken to by
Roy. His heart gave sudden bound
at a cordial: Hello, there, Tommy
Won't you come in and help us fire
these things Off"
Tommy fairly gasped at the idea
and his gaze stole rapturously to the
crackers lying about the ground, and
to the big box of torpedoes.
1t was strange, incomprehensible
He did not know that the night before
Doctor Green had made out list fol
the parade, choosing war veterans in
stead of prominent men to fill the con
spicuous places and that he had spok
Bonners Ferry herald. [volume] (Bonners Ferry, Idaho) 1904-current, 1915-06-25

now that she would have the warmest
of sympathizers in Susie.
AS she passed along, musing over
her trouble, a wan, unhappy little face
looked out at her from one of the win
dows: so serious was it that she
thought it, at first, that of an old per-
son. Then it flashed suddenly upon
her that it was Dick Marville, the
scrubwomans little boy, who had been
thrown from his sled while coasting
and had been helplessly paralyzed. AS
she hurried on she wondered what it
must mean to be a boy of ten and
housed like that on the fourth OF
July; a warm wave of sympathy swept
over her. and when she reached Su-
sizes house, instead of pouring into her
ears the tale of her own trouble, she
laid a little plan before her. She
knew that the Montgomerys always
had splendid fireworks in the eve
ming. What a treat it would be for
Dick if he could see them!
Susie, won't you let me drive your
dogcart down to the village and bring
poor little Dick Marville up here to
see the fireworks? He isn't having
any Fourth at all, and it must be
dreadfully dull for a boy"
why, you dear Peggy, it will be
splendid" And so, instead of griev-
ing over a miserable quarrel, Peggy
spent the next few hours in the hap
pest work she had ever done.
IL 1fff1n II,
her thoughts-not half so much as she
was in his, for he was having an un-
happy time of it. That evening as he
PASSED down Main street on his way
home he was surprised to see Susie
wontgomery's dogcart at the curb
near Dick Marville's home, and Peg
y. with the happiest expression on
| her face he had ever seen, lifting a
pale. but radiant, child from the cart
It seemed providential that he should
meet her thus With one bound he
sprang forward.
PEGGY, that child is too heavy for
YOU; let me carry him in" and with
out waiting for her answer he took
he boy from her and passed into the
house.
Peggy stood waiting; she couldn't
very we'll hurry away without thank
ng him; it would be so rude
In few moments he was out again
md helping her gently into the cart
he sprang in beside her and drove
oward the Montgomerys'.
After a moment Peggy spoke: "Tc
hink that poor little Dick Marville
lhould have brought us together like
his"
And Maurice replied: at wasn't
Dick, Peggy; it was your tender sym
)athy for one in trouble"
Bonners Ferry herald. [volume] (Bonners Ferry, Idaho) 1904-current, 1915-06-25
THE BONNERS FERRY HERALD
C. w. KING, Editor.
Established in 1891.

Published every Friday at Boomers
Ferry. Idaho. in the interests of the
Kootenai Valley of Idaho. Entered as
second class matter, January l, 1906,
at the postoffice at Boomers Ferry,
Idaho under the Act of Congress of
March 3, 1879.
Subscription rates, $3.50 per year If
paid in advance; $500 otherwise; Can
ada and foreign countries, $500 yearly
in advance.
Bonners Ferry herald. [volume] (Bonners Ferry, Idaho) 1904-current, 1915-06-25

ACME LODGE No. Is, Knights of
Pythias. Meets every Thursday night
at X. p. Hall. All visiting members
of the order made welcome. G. w.
Megquier, C. c.; G. w. Spoerry, X of r..
and s.; Charles Troutfether, M. of F.
Bonners Ferry herald. [volume] (Bonners Ferry, Idaho) 1904-current, 1915-06-25
This WAS PEGGY'S
DAY OF REAL JOY
ThoughtfuIness for the Unfortu-
nate Brought the Reward
That 1t Deserved.

The little town was gay with bunt
ing, and the clear sunshine and radi
ant blue of the skies seemed to unite
joyously for the festal occasion. Ev
Try one seemed infused with the pa
triotic spirit of the day, and Peggy
Marsden felt somewhat ashamed oil
her dropping spirits as she passed
down the street But it is hard, a.
twenty-five, when one has quarrelet
with ones sweetheart and given up &
picnic of many weeks planning il
consequence, to feel in the happiest o
moods.
She had decided to go down t
Bonners Ferry herald. [volume] (Bonners Ferry, Idaho) 1904-current, 1915-06-25
LODGE NOTICES

~ BONNERS FERRY
A LODGE No. 43, A.
10 f. e. A. M. Stated
o@CN~ communications sec
RAEN ond Wednesday of
each montL at the
X. p. Hall. Sojourning brothers are
always welcome. George r. Gray, W.
M; G. c. Bailey, secretary.
Bonners Ferry herald. [volume] (Bonners Ferry, Idaho) 1904-current, 1915-06-25

- "a , z , ~ ~
cheered up. Susie
M o n t g o m e 7 y
while favored OF
fortunes children
in the matter OF
wealth, was af'
ficted with an I'M
slightly deformity
that caused her to
shun social func'
lions and find her
pleasure a p a T I
from the crowds.
Happy go lucky
Peggy, as she was
often called, had
found a sympa-
thetic chord in the
girls heart, a n d
they were warm
friends. She knew
Bonners Ferry herald. [volume] (Bonners Ferry, Idaho) 1904-current, 1915-06-25

A new broom sweeps much cleaner
when a new servant girl is operating
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1915-05-15
OPERATION FATAL TO WOMAN
ENiBALMER.
Miss Viola Cofinnc Auburtin Dies II
Home Thursday After
Brief Illness.

New Orleans, May 14.-Miss Viola
Corinne Auburtin. New Orleans first
woman embalmer, died at her home,
1888 Eighth street, Thursday after
noon at 1885 o'clock. She had been
in i'll health for several weeks and
recently underwent an operation at
Touro Infirmary. For the past sew
era1 years she has been connected
with the undertaking and embalming
house Of NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS.
Company.
Miss Auburtin was graduated about
five years ago from Prof. Eckles'
Training School for Embalmers, Of
Philadelphia. Before she adopted
embalming as her life profession,
Miss Auburtin devoted herself to the
production Of flowers and nursing
the sick voluntarily. She graduated
from the training school with per-
centage of 81 and was noted for her
delicacy of touch ana peculiar skill
in handling arteries.
Miss Auburtin was an attractive
refined and cultured woman, q mem.
Der Of prominent family and highly
respected in this city. Her father,
A. E. Auburtin, has been connected
with the official life Of the city for
many years. Her brother, George
Auburtin, holds responsible rail
road position.
The funeral will be conducted from
he Auburtin home on Eighth street
at p. m, Friday.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1915-05-15
COMMITTEES NAMED FOR REST
AWHILE.
Kings Daughters Homo VIII be Open
EARLY In june.

80 49, IN.,. rs - orr ru1
view orleans, MAY 14.-ine nes'
Awhile board held it, first regulaI
meetinS Of the seaso. Thursday AZ.
t..noon !, -. uor,a rn.+,t,,t. ~.
=. 800 - - --'o $500. 4. !.
ueoree Wlllams Preslqlns. RESI-
Awniie, the Kings Daugnters sum
mer nome IA MenoeviIie, Will 3
openeq. N al proDaDlnty, June otn
Commlttees % put tne nome ~ Ieaal-
ness % receive visitoIs. ana on IN
vestea1ion ana Tansportation, were
app0lnteo at tne Meeting IauIsoay
% serve tnrousnout the season. TON
: uaS 20 oepteMDel.
Lne Ioliowlng VIII comp,lss .ne
omcels . anu c0n"ltse1 s,,, LOT lns sun,-
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1915-05-15
MILITARY ROAD NOTES.

There will be an entertainment
and dance at the Garden District
school, on May %, for the benefit Of
the school.
Mrs. Rapier and daughter Ruth
of New Orleans, are guests at Mrs
Sauter's.
Mr.. and Mrs. Henry Samuel are
over for the week.
Mr.. and Mrs. John Lee are spend
ing the summer at their home on
Military Road.
Mr.. Louis Burdette is the guest
of Mrs. McWhirter.
Miss Jessie Mae Rayne is visiting
in Bush, La.
Mrs. Eugene Huddleston has re-
turned to Covington, on visit tc
her son, John p. Huddleston.
Mrs. Lee is visiting Mrs. Oswald
OF Little Hill.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1915-05-15
YOUR CHILD's COUGH Is A CALL
FOR HELP.

Don't put OF treating your child's
cough. It not only saps their
strength, but often leads to more Sc
rious ailments Why risk? You
don't have to. DR.. Kings New Dis
covery is just the remedy your child
needs. It is made with soothing,
healing and antisertic balsams. Will
quickly check the cold and soothe
your child's cough away. 30 odds
how bad the cough or hov, long
standing, DR.. Kings New Discovery
will stop it. It's guaranteed. Just
get a bottle from your druggist and
try it.
2 ADV.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1915-05-15
BASEBALL.

Covington Grocery and Grains had
their new suits christened by defeat
at Ponchatoula, last Sunday. The
score was to /.
There is one thing to be said Of
the Covington team-it is q home
team and good team; but it cannot
be expected to play against profess
sional pitchers. The game is degen-
Grating into a pitchers battle. If
hired pitchers are to be employed to
play against local players the game
will soon loose its interest. Where
all the other players come up to the
pitchers standard, il he is a good
pitcher, the all-round playing makes
it interesting; but a simply mo- hit
game because Of the extreme expert
ness of one player is Of little interest
and creates no pride in home achieve
ment. Let the clubs all stick to home
talent. Keep a record Of the work
Of the individual players and build
up home talent. The increased in
terest in baseball will soon be shown
by good attendance at the games.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1915-05-15
CHICKEN LINERS.

An old hen has much larger liv-
er than you in proportion to weight
or food eaten. Then it follows that
they get bilious just like you do.
They are grouchy, cross, unhappy.
Start her liver and make her happy.
Then she will lay eggs all winter.
Come and get a .packs &c Of B. A.
Thomas Poultry Powder. Feed it
occasionally. See your hens perk up
hear the msing-look for eggs.
Your money back if it fails.
For sale by A. c. Mccormack.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1915-05-15
BEWARE OF OINTNdENTS FOR CA
TARRH THAT CONTAIN
MERCURY

as mercury will surely destroy the
sense Of smell and completely de-
range the whole system when enter
ing it through the mucous surfaces.
Such articles should never be used
except on prescriptions from repu-
table physicians. as the DAMAGE they
will do is ten fold to the good you
can possibly derive from them.
Halls Catarrh Cure, manufactured
by F. J. Cheney & Co., Toledo, o.,
contains no mercury, and is taken in
ternally, acting directly upon the
blood and mucous Races OF the
system. In buying Halls Catarrh
Cure be sure you get the genuine.
It is taken internally and made in
Toledo. o., by F. ]. Cheney & Co.
Testimonials free.
Sold by druggists. Price Is cents
per bottle.
Take Halls Family Pulls for con-
stipa&aon.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1915-05-15
RHEUMATISM YIELDS QUICKLY
TO SLOAN'S.

You can't prevent an attack Of
rheumatism from coming on, but you
can stop 1t almost Immediately.
Sloan's Liniment gently applied to
the sore joint or muscle penetrates
in few minutes to the inflamed spot
that causes the pain. It soothes the
hot, tender, swollen feeling, and in a
very short time brings relief that is
almost unbelievable until you ex-
perience it. Get a bottle Of Sloan's
Liniment for Csc OF any druggist and
have it in the houseagainst colds,
sore and swollen joints, lumbago.
sciatfca and like ailments. Yuor
money back is not satisfied, but IT
does give instant relief.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1915-05-15
DON'T DRENCH HORSES.

Use Farris Collie Remedy. Simp-
ly drop it on the horses tongue with
the medicine dropper that is furnish
ed with every so cent bottle. Cures
fifty-nine times out of sixty, and the
women can give it when 70 uare
away. Money back If it fails.
For sale by A. C. Mccormack.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1915-05-15
Abita Springs vs.. Madisonville.

jacksonville added one more to it.
reputation as one of the strongest
teams organized in this parish. Out
side Of the home run made by Abita,
there was nothing doing. After
Abita got three runs she swore OF,
while Mad:sonville piled up IS.
Score, 13 to 8.
St Paul VS.. Covington Grocery Z
i Grain.
Covington Grocery & Grain was de-
feated by St. Paul, Thursday, at the
st. Paul stadium. Park did not
pitch; neither did Delcambre. Score:
10 to 2. Grocery & Grains play in
New Orleans, Sunday.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1915-05-15
THE DRUIDs FESTIVAL.

The ffy-ninth annual May festival
of the Ancient Order of Druids will
take place in New Orleans Sunday,
May l6. There will be pstricn races,
an address by Governor Hall and 9th
er attractions.
There will be a game of baseball
between the Covington Grocery &
Grain and Gretna Druids, and quite
a delegation is expected to go over
from Covington.
Members of the Druids and the
baseball team are requested to meet
at the N. o. G. N. depot Sunday
morning. All Druids and their
friends are invited.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1915-05-15
WHOOPING COUGH.

when my daughter had whoop-
ing cough she coughed so hard at one
time that she had hemorrhage Of the
lungs. / was terribly alarmed about
her condition. Seeing Chamber
lain's Cough Remedy so highly rec
commended, got her q bottle and It
relieved the cough at once. Before
she had finished two bottles Of this
remedy she VISA entirely well" writes
Mrs. s. F.. Grimes, Crooksville, o.
Obtainable everywhere.