davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1915-10-20
JULIA RoTToMLEY.
A Party eao.

Have you ever gone to a party and
faced the problem OF where to put
your handkerchief? Party dresses as a
rule are not provided with pockets. A
girdle is a dangerous hiding place for
a handkerchief-if one desires to keep
the handkerchief A pretty finish TO
such a costume. as well as a service
able finishing feature, " one of those
dainty little bags just large enough TO
hold a glove handkerchief and a vanity
box. Thep are done In silk and figured
satin and shirred on a ribbon which
hangs on tho wrist.
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1915-10-20
DECREASE In WHISKY.

The following figures are from the
Wall Street Journal: Production OF
whisky in Kentucky in January vas
100000 gallons, against 6,1O2,452 gal
Ions in January, 1914; production in
Pennsylvania was 1,O73,SOS gallons in
January, against 1924 a year ago,
and in Maryland 5o6.91 gallons,
against 91S,5S2. Whisky bottled in
bond in January was 691,50S gallons,
as compared with ,1S7 in January,
1914. The Kentucky decrease for one
month was &C 2-3 per cent, the Penn
sylvania decrease practically 33 per
cent and the Maryland dealers over 40
per cent.
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1915-10-20
A PROGRESSIVE DISEASE

Families that serve wine at meals
are doing the greatest injustice TO
their children, for instead of allowing
them to drink anything but nonirtoxi.
eating drinks they are starting that
progressive disease that may end in
their ultimate death or disgrace. To
see a beautiful young girl drink
cocktail or even a glass OF sherry
onends health aristocrats, for they
know that poison is contained in every
drop. The misfortune of all poison
taking lies not only in the always ad-
Vancing appetite but in the always
receding will.-Lillian Russell.
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1915-10-20
LIQUOR AS HOME wREckER.

The searchlight is being thrown up
on the alcoholic question from every
angle of vision. Chicago Herald has
investigated from the matrimonial
angle. TIC what extent is alcohol re.
sponsiblo for the wrechng Of houses
by divorce? Answering this question
fer Chicago-which city, it is said,
had a divorce g. day last year-the
Herald gave a t7buls4ed report. It's
findings show among other things that
the two charges of hakitgal drunken.
ness and cruelty ara n,.e frequent in
divorce cases tlan ary o'he- che com
bination of charges.
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1915-10-20
Lost b. Winninu.

IL made the mistake OF nv life
when ! married for money" admitted
the sad-eyed man. as he let out deep
sigh.
But you knew there was a woman
attached to the coin before you faced
the parson." protested tho cynical
bachelor
Yes" admitted the part, of the
prelude but had no idea she was so
hrmly attached to it that she wouldn't
let go Of cent"
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1915-10-20
ALCOHOLIC HARD TO HANDLE

The alcoholic always does badly un
der surgery. In the first place 1t takes
great deal more anesthetc to get
him ready for the operation, and that
adds TO his risk. II the second place,
he is much more likely 70 have dis.
eased kidneys and liver, and that adds
yet moro tC his risk. and thirdly. the
risk or insanity and OF pneumonia
after an operation is greater. The ab
stinent man and woman stand opora
lions best-Dr. Howard A. Kelly
Johns Hopkins University. noted sur
geon,
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1915-10-20

The underside of the brim IS Gov
cred with shirring of white satin rib
bon. This hat Is one OF those that the
home milliner may undertake to make
with every chance of success She
Is first TO secure a light buckramette
frame and unless the frame is made
wit soft top crown of net, it's buck.
ram top crown is to be cut out. II
should be remembered in fitting a
frame that It should be little large
for the head TO allow for the facing
and lining.
JULIA RoTToMLEY.
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1915-10-20
Oct. II, 1914.

Belgian army left Ostend and
Joined allies in the field.
Allies reocupied Ypres and
French gained near the border.
German battalion trapped in ca
nal in Lorraine.
Germans occupied Bruges.
Germans recaptured Lyck but
advance on Warsaw was repulsed
~ Russians.
Russians in Galicia driven back.
Serbians beaten back in Bosnia
Cossacks brought down a Zeppe-
liza near Warsaw.
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1915-10-20
Oct. 10, 1914.

Germans moved on Ostend anc
Sruses.
Lille, Hazebrouck and Ypres oc
oupied by Germans.
Fierce fighting at Dixmude, Gen
eral Won kluck trying to turn al
lie left wing.
Germans made dash for War
saw.
Montenegrins defeated Austri
ans near Sarajevo.
Detachment of Beers under Col
onel Maritz rebelled and martial
law was proclaimed throughout
South Africa.
French routed German avators
near Paris.
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1915-10-20
Oct. is, 1914.

Germans took Ostend and Blan.
kenberghe on the North sea, and
TnieIt. Oaume and Esschen.
Allies retook Estaire.
French recaptured AItkirch and
Mueihausen.
German convoy taken by the
French.
Colonel erits' force in South At
RIGA captured 80 rebel Beers;
General 5otha took the field.
British cruiser Yarmouth sunk
German liner Markomannia.
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1915-10-20
VODKA AND WAR.

The greatest single sentence sver
uttered for prohibition" Charles
Johnson asserts in the American Re.
view OF Reviews, came from the lips
or NJ. kharitonoh. contrGller OF the
russian treasury, speaking before the
budget committee OF the Russian par.
lament 1t ran thus: with tho war
and without vodka Russia is more
prosperous than with vodka ana With.
out the war"
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1915-10-20
VERY CAREFUL.

Did you break anything today.
Norah?" asked the lady of the house.
NO, maam." was the reply.
Nothing"
NO ma'am."
Are you sure you didn't break a
single thing"
"Yes, ma'am''
Not even one of the command.
ments. Norah?"
On, well. ma'am, wouldn't be
wicked enough to call a commandment
a thing, ma'am"
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1915-10-20
Oct. 10, 1914.

Germans occupied Zeebrugge.
First battle of Ypres began.
Reinforced allied north wing
swung in on Lille and retook Ar.
mentieres.
Attempt of Germans to reach
Dunkirk checked.
Germans at ST. Mihiel forced
back toward Alsatian border.
German-Austrian forces assumed
the offensive between the VistuIa
and GaIicia.
Serbs and Montenegrins defeat
ed Austrians at GIasinatz.
British cruiser Hawke sunk by
German submarine.
British and Japanese warships
bombarded Tsingtau fort.
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1915-10-20
Proof Positive.

The liquor dealer had just filed a
bill against the estate.
What is 1t for?" asked the execu.
tor.
For whisky furnished the de-
ceased replied the dealer. "Will it
be necessary for me to swear to the
account"
"Oh. no." answered the executor.
THE fact that he is dead is sufficient
proof that he got the whisky all
right"
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1915-10-20
Handing Down a Feud.

= Son" said the father of q husky
sophomore.
Yes, dad"
Isn't old Dan Bresher's boy a fresh
man at Gadkins this year?"
Sure he is. I've walloped him doz-
ems OF times"
Keep it up, son; old Dan Bresher
made things pretty warm for me when
i was a freshman at Gadkins."
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1915-10-20
Oct. IL, 1914.

Germans occupied GheSt.
Belgian government moved to
tiaVre, France.
Battles at Lasigny and Lens.
Cavalry fighting near Lille.
Russians abandoned siege of
Przenysl and retreated from Ga
licia.
Six more bombs dropped on
Paris.
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1915-10-20
lefl1pela5l1ld:|s
e @S3H
Conducted by the National woman's
Christian Temperance Union)
RAILROADS ANB RUM.

stNf1hSNOS AWE NUN.
A certain railroad, says Golfers.
announces with pardonable pride that
1t carried last year on it's 10000 miles
OF track 1SS.111.S76 passengers, and
not one Of these passengers was
killed in a train accident That"
says the Canton TO- Daily News, lis
one OF the biggest zeroes. one OF the
mightiest noughts, that the year has
to boast Of" Another newspaper. the
Butler (Pa) Citizen. writes: There
is no doubt whatever that this condi-
ton was rendered possible only by the
company insisting on strict sobriety
on the part OF its employees. With
drunken engineers, drunken dispatch
ers, and drunken conductors, accidents
and deaths would have been common.
Drinking on the part OF employees
used to cost their employers a Let OF
money one way or another But now.
adays 1t only costs the railroad man
his job"
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1915-10-20
Extra Precautions.

The Debutante-A young man wants
me to send him my picture Would
that be proper?
The Older One-Why not?
The Debutante-Perhaps to be on
the safe side, I'd better inclose one of
my chaperon as well.-Puck.
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1915-10-20
In the Earlv Morn

Singleton-That baby OF yours is
getting TO be quite a big chap
Wederly-WeH, / guess yes. When
/ have 20 walk the floor with him
nights he gains about two pounds a
minute
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1915-10-20
Only Fair.

DO understand you to say" asked
the judge, that his remarks we're acri.
monious?"
NO, Judge, your honor, didn't say
that. | said he just swore at me.
| amt a-goin' to claim that he done
what he didn't do"
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1915-10-20
THE EUROPEAN WAR A
YEAR AGO THIS WEEK
Oct. II, 1914.

Oct. II, 1914.
Heavy fighting near scissors.
German attacks in craonne re-
aion repulsed.
Allies won in the center.
Montenegrins defeated Austri-
ans near kaIenovitch.
Russians swept through Buko-
wilma.
Austrians rushed help to Pre-
mysI.
French fleet sank two Austrian
torpedo boats.
German aviators killed three In
Paris with bombs.
Japanese aviators dropped
bombs in Tsingtau..
Russian cruiser PalIada torpe
doed and sunk in Baltic.
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1915-10-20
Loves Prouress.

Knicker-How can you tell how long
they have been married?
Bocker-By whether she wants him
TO stop smoking to save his health, his
money or the curtains.
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1915-10-20
OF course Paw Knew

Little Lemuel-Say. paw, why does
the camel have hump?
Paw-The camel has a hump. son.
so he-er-won't be mistaken for
mule
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1915-10-20
Life Of Bio Guns

Guns with a bore OF 70 inches or
more can only fire 90 full charges.
They are then considered to be worn
out and have to be sent to the foun.
dry TO have new core inserted
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1915-10-20
Wall of 4 Dusncntln

u used to think how I'd wine and
dine to my hearts content when | got
rich"
And do you. now that you are
rich ?"
Alas. no! can only dine and
whine"
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1915-10-20
a Livinu.

-Smythe-He made living by going
from bad to worse
Smithe-How could he do that?
Smythe-He was a doctor.--Car-
goyle.
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1915-10-20

You used to refer to yepr wife as
your better half"
Il have revised my fractions" re-
plied Mr. Meekton. 81 don't feel as
II / represented more than one per
cent Of the con- blnation.H
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1915-10-20
Spoke Too Plainly

Ned DO you believe In the language
Of flowers?
Ted-To be sure The last ones I
sent Miss Charmer tell me III have to
do without smoking for a month
Town Topics
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1915-10-20
The Sim

j wonder II the chestnut crop will
be good this year,"
You can generally tell that by the
fish stories
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1915-10-20
Their Way.

I'm the West formerly they had
quite telephone way of handling
men who dealt in stolen horses"
How was it telephonic?"
They hung up the receiver"
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1915-10-20

THAT policeman who has just come
in has a professional affection"
What might It be-"
lie has a couple OF felons on his
hands"
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1915-10-20
His Renrisal.

Doctor-Why have you deducted a
quarter from my bill?
Patient-That is for the six cigars
you broke when you thumped my
chest
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1915-10-20
Not a Bit Artificial at That.

The Girl-Oh. do love nature so!
The Farmer-Yes, miss; she's just
as natural around here as any place
know Of
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1915-10-20
Sure Thinu.

Il am going to name my yacht Ru-
NOR"
"Why?"
Because if there's anything in a
name she's sure to keep afloat."
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1915-10-20

Griggs-Tbat new leighbor OF ours
must be a veEy happy woman. She
goes about the house singing all day
long
Mrs. Griggs-Well, why shouldn't
che be happy She's a widow.
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1915-10-20
More Lawn.

why can't / come to see you to.
morrow uightT
Don't blame me" said tho beau
uful girl Our cook has the use OF
the parlor under the new domestic
relations law"
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1915-10-20
Iettind in Flies

Your husband is rather stout"
Weighs over 900 pounds He's a
pest in summertime"
How so?"
Takes him too long to get through
a screen door"
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1915-10-20
Modern Life

Formerly a girl took pride in &C.
cumulating linen for her chest"
"Well?"
Now she collects a lot Of graphic
phone records '- Cincinnati Times.
star.
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1915-10-20
More Truth Oozes Out

Now here's another mighty truth
Though It's a shame to say it;
your temper you must lose forsooth.
Before you can display It,
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1915-10-20
The Simple Life.

If you are drawing nine per week.
IL Is up to you to scrimp:
But you can live the simple life.
Because your pay is simp.
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1915-10-20
Not the Same.

Are you going to have any oscu-
iatory entertainment at the party?"
oh, nothin so grand as all that
Just few old-fashioned kissing
games"
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1915-10-20

ouintessence Of collaboration.
She is terribly conceited"
How SOP"
why she believes what her press
agent says of her"
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1915-10-20

Scribbler-Why, that novelist makes
habit of rewriting stories and pass
ing them off as his own. He's lit
erary crook.
Quibbler-A sort OF "second-story
man." eh?
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1915-10-20

Would you marry a man to reform
him?"
Not before was at least thirty-fve
years old"
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1915-10-20
Yea, Verify!

Men and measures" is term
That drops from many "a lip.
But The Willy waiter measures
a man from tip TO tip.
Ceredo advance. [volume] (Ceredo, W. Va.) 1885-1939, 1915-10-20

Some people make an effort TO be
happy and trust to luck TO be good
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1915-04-02
TAKE PROFIT OUT OF WAR

If we are to have more battle ships
let the government build them at
government navy yards. If we must
have more guns let the government
make them in it's own shops If we
must have powder, bullets and shells
and other implements of death, let
the government manufacture them.
And so with aircraft for war, so with
mines and submarines.
Admitting that we need all those
things, yet it is true that we do not
need a war lobby at Washington, nor
do we need the constant, inspired
agitation through the newspapers for
the preparedness for war" that
means private profit to those engag-
ed in building ships, making armor
plate, powder, guns, and other i'm
plements of war.
1t is of very little consequence
whether or not things can be made
more cheaply by the government
can be made at lower cost than by
private firms or individuals. Profit
in war and preparedness for war"
is an incentive to agitation for war.
San Francisco Star.
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1915-04-02
DURR ON RAMPAGE


Those close to Peter Durr say that
the air was made blue by the intense
heat of the Hamilton County states
man when he learned Of Attorney
General Turner's opinion that the
new tax law emergency clause was
invalid This was Durr's pet meas
ure, for by and through its operation
he expected at once to go into the
wrecking business and land the tax
job in this county together with it's
numerous appointments and emolu-
ments.
The first train from Cincinnati to
Columbus after the Turner episode
carried the irate would-be boss. Just
what transpired at the capitol is not
known only to select few, but it is
now evident that an attempt will be
made to patch up the decrepit meas
ure, though it is doubtful if it can be
made to do duty in vacating the posi-
tions now held by Democratic boys
who did such efficient work during
the last assessing term.
Durr's predicament aroused amuse
ment among those who have been
watching the wrecking operations of
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1915-04-02

There is to be no investigation Of
the lobby work in Ohio but some in
formation has been supplied-and
some of it comes from the Attorney
General-which has made Governor
Willis sit up and take notice espec-
tally as ii follows the short rib jolt
his friend Harding, the deferential,
gave him last week. Therefore word
has been officially issued that ANY
violation of the anti-lobby law will
be promptly dealt with The purity
of legislation must and will be pre-
served at its source" This sounds
like a school-bOy's essay, but since 1t
is the first expression from the CUB
ernatorial chambers since the lobby
lists grabbed the statehouse, root and
branch, it may mean something, At
any rate publicity to the fact that the
attorney general is smelling around
the corridors will scare off the timid
gents who have failed to register and
it may cause those registered to be
more guarded in their movements.
Governor Willis is said to have really
shown signs of anger when Inform
ed" that a certain notorious female
lobbyist had been granted desk-room
in he senate chamber Even yet he
says he hopes the reports he has been
hearing" are not true. In this year
A. D. 1915, why is a governor, any
wav9
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1915-04-02
BUYING AT HOME

A Columbus merchant is sending
out a card on which are printed these
pat and pertinent questions:
IF you buy out of town, and we
buy out of town, and all our neigh
bors buy out of town, what in thun-
der will become of our town? Ever
think of it?"
That is a new and striking way of
putting the everlasting truth that the
people living in a city ought to pat
ronize one another as long as they
can get the right goods at the right
prices. Thus they help themselves
by helping to build up the city in
which they live and, besides, do the
kindly neighbOrly thing
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1915-04-02
FOXY POLITICS

Foxy politics don't win political
victories very often" says Kansas
newspaper, and then proceedes to call
attention to the remissness of the leg
islature in several particulars, where
in a political party is apparently try
ing to deceive the public into beliey-
ing ii is effecting tremendous econ
omies; but while we in this State are
not especially interested in proposed
economies in Kansas, we can read
and re-read the text, and wonder if
the Ohio Legislature is aware of the
fact that the foxy politics isn't the
best business politically.
The present administration has at
tempted more foxy politics than has
been attempted in this state for fifty
years. 1t has pretended to be in fav-
or of economy, and has gone on rec
ord as fayoring the reductions of a
few salaries, while voting itself pOck-
ct knives, carnations, scissors and
small household furnishings 1t has
pretended to be trying to destroy a
political machine, while appointing
to office every man who was connect
ed with the campaign headquarters,
some of them tome-worn politicians
who have been placed in positions Of
great responsibilities It has pro-
fessed to be in favor of "decentraliz-
ing" several departments, and has
urged the establishment of dozen
separate boards to take the place of
one board. 1t has told the working
men that it was in favor of the work
mems compensation, and is proceed
ing to load up the industrial commits
sion, that administers the law, with
a lot of political hacks that are bound
to cause a failure of the laW-and
this at the behest Of the liability in
surance companies. SO it remains
to be seen whether foxy politics in
this state will or will not prove to be
a good political investment.-Da
News.
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1915-04-02

In the interest of economy the
state administration has retained Dan
Torpy, former managing commission
er of the Ohio Panama-Pacific Expo
sition Commission, to look after af-
fairs in San Francisco His successor
Newton D. Miller, salary $4,000 and
Sherman Cuneo, Gov. Willis press
agent during the campaign, now sec
retary to the commission, are both in
Ohio looking after politics.
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1915-04-02

with the approval Of the govern
or" three state boards have submits
sively named three strange young
men as secretaries at $4,000 a year
They had to be introduced to the
board members by the Governors re-
preventative. Two Of them were
from Ada.
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1915-04-02

If the minority had not detected
the sleeper the Willis bill establish
Agricultural would have cost the
state $4,000 for per diem allow
ances" as against 100000 now paid
for salaries each year. The sleeper
was inserted after the bill had been
read in both houses.
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1915-04-02

Hamilton county's thoroughly bus
iness-like political organization got
for its first helping from the grateful
Governor, the State Highway COM
missionership and control OF about
$10,0O0,000 annually of road con-
tracts. Hereafter roads OF all con-
tractors will lead to Cincinnati.
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1915-04-02

and Mr. Cannon ate very heartily OF
that American edible, Indian corn; in
fact almost his entire dinner consis-
ted of corn The westerner looked
at him and said: Say. Mr., Cannon,
what does Il cost you TO board here2"
About So a day, said Mr., Cannon.
III be burned" draWled his con-
stitutent, "ef l don't think IL would
be cheaper fer you TO board at liv-
cry stable"
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1915-04-02

the Legislature and the hungry Ham
ilton County hounds that are froth-
Ing al the mouth But more are dis
gusted with the ignorance and gener-
al incapacity OF the Republican ma
jority in the General Assembly which
allowed this bungling job to get by
them Cincinnati Record.
The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1915-04-02

he had been robbed in an alley by a
colored woman. his loss being S117
and a gold watch. He had been maxi
Ing tour of the unfrequented part
OF the city with a delegation OF lob-
byists.