The Barre daily times. (Barre, Vt.) 1897-1959, 1915-04-06
MABEL SYRUP'S COLYUM
TO have lively and not stolid
countenance."
Truth Of Intercourse.

/ TO have a lively and not stolid
| countenance."
Truth Of Intercourse.
Our own idea OF absolute zero in op
timism is appropriated by the Barr
tobacconist who offered odds of eight Il
i've that the granite strike in these en-
virons will be settled before the end o.
the Great War.
Out and Around Among the Neighbors
Little Miss Beatrice Billings, who lives
at H. r. Mobiles, tipped a dish Of hot tea
into her lap few days ago and doctor
was called in consequence.-Ripton item
We Know You, Gene.
Eugene Lyman is going to get club
orders for nursery trees.-Jericho item
| -
And You, Too, Dan!
Dan Burleson skipped church Sunday
and with his wife and son, Robert, called
at Courser's. ~-"The Branch" correspond
ence, Enosburg.
Don't go to Boston to visit the animal
show, for we have a curiosity right here
in town. Last Saturday -year-old
heifer belonging to Peter Beaudette gave
birth to a calf having bulldogs head.
The calf is well developed in all respects,
seems healthy, eats it's daily rations of
milk and indeed, is wonderful freak OF
nature Derby item.
.
Hand in the news. If your speckled
hen lays square egg, or the latest lit
ter of kittens have wings, or you happen
to hook whale when fishing for polly
wogs, report to the local scribe. He'll fix
it up and tell the truth every time
"The Branch correspondence, Enosburg.
Bill Sunday.
@ why will men be critcising BillyY
O why will men be criticising Billy9
1t is not only wicked but it's silly;
And the desks before him bang,
Yet there's always something doing where
is Billy.
Newport Express and Standard.
.
Untrousered we enter this world,
Gntrousered and red;
Untrousered go out OF this world,
Untrousered and dead.
Such is the tale OF mans life,
The naked epitome;
Therefore man cries to the gods
"Trouser me! Pity met"
But the gods 90 untrousered themselves.
land the goddesses, ma'am!l
And they laugh in their scorn and they
say:
"Who cares a -~tussS"
Don Marquis.
The tree swallow has arrived but he
hasn't made a summer.
.
Editing requires that one be states
man. an essayist, geographer, a stats
tician. and in acquisition, encyclopaedia.
Dewitt Talmadge.
We didn't know that DR.. Talmadge
took The Colyum so seriously.
Dear Mabel Syrup:
Why is a spring vacation ! have
three children of my own; each has |
bow or girl acquaintance and nine Young. |
one time or another in this muddy |
spring vacation have doubled my fore
Moons work for a week.
Mrs. Twolynner
With the well.known school war about
10 be ended. Plainfeld is looking forward
% a mediocre summer.
Not that we have the slightest notion
hat anything like the following could
nave happened outside Our Own Legisla
ure, but rather because II paints in its
,wn intimately urbane language pic.
ure OF rural statesmen that exists only
n the l0.cent joke book that YOU buy on
he train, we reprint No. s.356 from Tho
Newspaper Mans Own Compendium of
original Anecdotes. Series of 1883:
Two members of the Vermont legisla.
ure met the other day and one of them,
Who had just been reading some war
Iews. said;
"This war is certainly terrible
hing"
"What war" questioned member No
/, with an air OF interest
"Nhy the European war.
Without a doubt, i will go down A. one !
{ the most appalling wars Of all time. :
"When's this an coming of, anyway 4
till interested.
why. now, today" exclaimed TIE 4
rst speaker somewhat exaspersted.
Our agricultural friend cooked his e
We mp AZ the heaven. shifted his cud OF /
hewing, then. with infsllible aim. direct. !
4 y stream Of tobacco juice a. nearby !
tone and said. "Wcll. they got a good :
az for it"-Ncw York sun. /,