The Lakeland evening telegram. (Lakeland, Fla.) 1911-1922, 1915-02-06
THE SCENERY SPECIAL
By AUGUST WHITFIELD.

these stories Of holdups and train
robberies," said Monk, always re-
mind me of an actress who has been
robbed of her glittering glassware. You
never heard of anyone doing much
on the proceeds Of historic highway
ing, and the man who attempts to hold
1 up a modern express train. may get
away with the goods, but eventually
the sheriff puts him on his visiting
list"
Right you are" replied the pug
nosed brakeman. 1T takes nerve to
hold up a train. but it takes more than
nerve to pull the trick of successfully
II and retire on the proceeds. The men
who possess all the qualifications req.
uisite for such jobs generally land q
sinecure behind the frosted-glass par
tition."
Nov you're talking classical Eng
lish," commented Monk, "and ex-
pressing clarified thought in capsule
FORM never knew but one man to
pull off a holdup successfully, and
then obliterate himself from the sur.
roundings.
1T happened down South, where at
one time the railroads we're noted for
their lack of speed. and where it was
impossible to miss a train All you
had to do, If your train had left the
station, was to follow it on foot, and
you couldn't miss it unless you over
looked 1t or mistook it's creeping for
the inertia of a side-tracked section"
YES" commented the pug-nosed
brakeman. 81 knew of a man down
there who brought suit against the s..
L. o. road to recover for damages sus-
tanned in humping into the rear end Of
the moonlight limited while walking
along the track.
"The company tried to non-suit him
by bringing a counter-charge of tres
pass; but his lawyer threatened to at
tack the validity of their charter on
the ground that they could not prove
that they were running trains. and
they withdrew their charge.
"The plaintiff won his suit, and the
company was ordered to upholster the
rear end of their trains to prevent a
repetition of such accidents"
We'll, to get back to the holdup,'
said Monk, 81 was touring the South,
some years back. and at this partic.
ular time my objective point was
Boonville. AS l had lots of leisure,
decided to make the trip by rail.
Il caught up to freight bound for
that point, and. sauntering up to it,
swung myself aboard the caboose and
proceeded to accord myself with cor
dial welcome. took possession OF
the lower bunk without waiting fol
I the porter to appear, and was soor
In the land of dreams.
II was awakened by the crew, who
had come back to see if the rear enc
was all right. He asked me what the
Stonewall Jackson l meant by intrud
ing, and volunteered to punch m!
ticket or my head without fear o.
|. favor
Il hypnotized him by making few
occult passes, and he extended me thu
cordial entente. 1t was pretty soo'
stuff, even thoush 1t was tax free an,
did not bear the pure-food guaranty.
1T you will pardon the interruI
tion," said the pug-nosed brakeman
] II want to pay tribute to the railroad
Of the South. The southern spirit O
:, hospitality is not dead, and the Ches
terfields OF the rail will give you tn
glad welcome or the G. b. with all tn
grace born of hercdity and long prat
tice. They will fire you from a trai
in such courtly manner that you fee
like apologizing for giving them tn
trouble"
your representation comedies wit
my observation" commented Monl
This Chesterfield of the caboos
told me we were approaching Ho
mountain. a moonshiners' stronghold
noted for its reluctance to contribut
to the revenues Of the governmer
and for the weirdness and grandel
Of its scenery.
HE said he had to 60 back to tt
engine and tend to his fire. and he a
vised me to take a seat in the observ
tory Of the caboose and enjoy II
, phantasorama.
Il took his advice. and found tn
we were travelling up into the mou
tain, and that the scenery was all tn
he claimed for it. was taking
the scape, when l noticed tall mou
taineer making his way down a rugg'
path toward US.
HE carried a long rifle. and w
accompanied by q lean, lanky CO,
dog. He reached the railroad ira
just as we passed. and. spying 7
looking out the observatory windC
like a blooming Juliet securing I
horizon for dilatory Romeo. he poi
ed his rifle at me and commanded:
"'You-all throw up your hands,
81 looked at him in amazement, /
lost no time in doing the upward D
sarte movement.
"'Say you moth-eaten mountaine,
I shouted, what's the answer to I,
riddle you're propounding? Have
unconsciously butted into Hattie
Mccoy combination. or do you mag
this is a treasure train?
"'You-all stop that train. or I'll bl
your darned head off, he replied.
"'How the heck do you expect
to stop the train?' | shouted ba
Run along, Reuben. and file your
quest with the engineer. He's T
ming this seeing-the-scenery spe,
from the front end
For a moment he looked as If
doubted my statement; then, lower
his gun. he sprinted for the forw
Il Il i