The Washington herald., 1915-11-29

In or club talks we have never taken
up the subject of disobedience for direct
discussion; It has only entered incidental
~ into the substance Of the other topics
we have been considering. But so many
mothers are complaining that their chill
dren no longer obey them implicitly, that
I have been thinking for some time we
ought to have a heart-to-heart talk about
the matter.
Why are children disobedient?
Many letters come in my mail on the
order Of this one from a mother in the
Middle West
Dear Aunt Chatty: My Jack is such
sweet little fellow. just years old. He
has always minded me perfectly until
lately. but now he is growing SO dis
obedient / don't know what / am going
to DO with him. And he is getting OBJ
streperous when / won't let him do
things. This is the way things happen
every day now. Yesterday afternoon he
wanted TO go over TO our next-door
neighbors to play with their two boys
He Is usually allowed 10 go. but this
time there was another boy there. a cou-
sin Of theirs. who uses bad words and
swears. OF course I cannot let Jack play
with a 10y like that, so ! told him he
couldn't go. / didn't want to run down
the other boy to him. - when he asked
why just said because / said so. Then
there was a scene, and / finally had to
whip him and send him to bed. Please
tell me how ! am going to make him see
he has to mind me-"
Many mothers make the mistake this
dear mother is making with her boy.
Because I say so" is not a good and
sufficient excuse for a reasonable human
being. That Is what we forget our chill
dren unreasonable human beingsI They
need, and should have, a clear eXplana-
ton Of the why's and wherefores of your
commands. and little Jack was entitled to
know why a privilege to which he was
accustomed should be suddenly with
drawn. without other explanation than
because ! say So"
Being a reasonable child, he could see
neither reason nor justice in such a shift
of position. He could ascribe it to moth
ing except an unreasonable within on the
part Of his mother. Naturally, he re-
belled. Then his rebellion, his emotional
excitement, manifested itself in a nervous
explosion. and he became "obstreperous."
Don't you see the whole sequence, dear
mothers? Half the disobedience in our
children, yes. moro than half. comes
from our own bungling. II Jacks mother
had not wished to explain that the other
boy at the home Of her neighbor that
afternoon was not a suitable companion
for her boy, she would have avoided all
the trouble II she had proposed some
more attractive plan to Jack than going
there to play-something that would
make him glad to give up that pleasure.
Let me explain by telling you how one
OF our mothers managed.
Little Milton. the son OF one of my
dear friends, had been boisterous and
rude one day when. out driving In the
pony cart with his nurse and his small
sister, and had had to be punished for
his misbehaviour. A few days later. the
cart WAs about to set out again with the
nurse, the little sister and another little
girl Milton had been allowed to go to
play with some neighbor boys, because
his mother feared a repetition of his bad
conduct II he went for the drive without
her. BE saw the preparations for the