Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1915-04-21

shed, with anybody at any old time they amt BUSY"
number of this precious organ.
Therefore it is the aim of the editors to crowd its short sweet life with
many things.
If we were to give full credit for all that has been swiped, seized and
copied outright from other publications W would be compelled to men
ton practically every journal from the Brewers Gazette" to the christian
Advocate" and We amt gon' to do it cause we amt got the room.
And. kind reader, this sheet wasn't framed up for the especial purpose
of throwing the harpoon into "frends'-as some people might think, after
perusing these pages.
Nor was it organized to pan Mrs. Pankhuwt-or to.diaate the policy
of Woodrow Wilson's administraton-and say what time the President
should arise to milk the White House Cow.
No, No, dear Subscriber, none of these things we're uppermost in the
minds of the editors of this great umnary, when they sat in their million
dollar sanctum sanctimonous and conceived the brilliant idea of becoming
responsible for a free and untrameed press. H.
Their thoughts, in fact, dwelt entirely upon a far greater work-a
work If such merit that it is destined to go down into the archives of his
tory as the Big Noise Of the age-the ELKs MINsTRELS.
There you have it. ~
This sheet was organized to BOOST.
To Boost the Show.
And incidentally have a little fun. H.
THE MINSTREL SHOW is sure gon to be a jim Dandy, a Pippin La
Extraordinary. And take it from us, Bill, those that amt there, On n r
or If the big nights, are sure gGn' to miss the real Ecu de Jde of their
lives.
And you certainly can't afford o miss that Ecu de Joe.
SO what's the matter with comm out and comm in.
That Minstrel Show is simply gon' tic be EiMMENsE! )
: : :
BY the time the Elks Booster edition falls beneath your eye, the editors
will have betaken themselves to the hills. Prior to the determination to
publish this newspaper, assurance of protection was obtained from Chief
Of Police Downing, and if Watkins takes up the chase against u.s., W have
in waiting a Wright aeroplane, S o one and all can see that there is abso-
lutely no use in sailing in. "
Deep down in some lonely spot, comforted by the thought " e are not
ONE and dare not go home, we will abide until the shadows vanish. Deep
will the editor draw upon his gaspipe and mediate. Napoleon, be it re-
membered, left Moscow after a daring venture that startled the world.
Mark Antony cut some kind of a caper in and around Egypt and then peter
ed out. Lee made the effort of his life around Gettysburg, and turned home
ward hisheartened and downcast. Taft a a bluff on the whole United
States and then retired to the obscurty of a law professorship in a day
school Roosevet altar rpanizin ta Progressive Marty told # tn Il
to amagamation and went lecturing in South America.
SO far a W. ourselves arec concerned after preparing all the copy tor
the Elks Booster and upon the assurance. that it will be printed we leave
town in a sidedoor sleeper ovr the traction line, our destination being
wherever we are put off by the brakeman. The days are still cool but we
feel that we have made this edition hot enough for all purposes, and we go
into Punishment cheeruly, feeling the need Of cooling breezes that will
soothe with lingering car@ss these brovs and heated brain cells,
We look back, however, I'VE or past-and nowhere in it can We recall
infamy such as this In VI youth and bucky days we plucked the juicy
lemon 1t IN unsuspectng hour; re twisted and tied the tails Of Thomas
cats into intricate knots and laid them gently across the knob of the front
entrance Of maiden ladies' domcies in order to learn new steps in what
is now the Tango; verify, W e have sat on the dark side Of a country church
and a the nearsghted elder passed the collection plate re have softly
laid thereon a goodly sized pearl button a: the same time lifting two dimes
in exchange; we have dismembered numerous strands If sundry hammocks'
in order that when our sisters beau sat therein, great would be his fall;
we have even cut a section Of lead pipe from the cstefn If a washerwom.
al and watched her yank the pump handle until her face resembled a fried
egg-but never before have we been guilty of so great a crime s edit
ing this edition of the Booster.
We go into voluntary retirement (please note, not bankruptcy; but we
will come again. We sanguinely expect to sneak back into the corporate
limits of Bismarck not later than the night of the 23d inst, when We
hope to actually witness the production that we have lied so openly and
50 fagranuy about. So if it is for n other reason or earth than to SET us
apprehended and possibly strung up, yu should not fail to see the Eks
Big Minstrel Show on Friday night.
Were it, however, the last word W e had to say. that word would be in
support of the Els' Big Minstrel. See it at the Auditorium o. Friday night,
April g. Nobody in Bismarck car afford to miss it. Rather had you bet.
ter miss the Panana-Pacihc Exposition than this; rather had you never
seer a Punch and Judy show in your childhood days than to miss the Min.
strel; rather had you never felt the joys of playing truant from your VIII
lage school than to miss this minstrel. There will be 10Y enough to 90
around. Meet the Best People on Earth at the Auditorium theatre
THE PANAMA CANAL
What the editors of the Elks Booster don't know about the Panama
Canal would fill several editions de luxe of the Cycopedia Britannica, but