The Alaska citizen., 1915-08-23

tllt. anu " llttl- illf t'il t'l4hfi ttHN''t him if he would have water with his skey. he sprung the following story.
 "A woman in Ireland had some thing of a leld-day on hand. She began by knocking down two some what unpopular agents of her ab- sentee landlord, and was seen later in the day dancing a jig on the stomach of the prostrate form of the Presbyterian minister. One of her friends admired her prowess in this direction and invited her in and gave her a good stiff glass of whis- key Her friend said, shall | pour some water in your whiskey9' and the woman replied. For Gods sake, haven't | had enough trouble al ready today?'
 Martin Martin Gately is cor Gately fined to his cabin and Injured. is under the care of a
 physician. The cause of his enforced idleness is that he let wagon run over him.
 The wagon was loaded with wood and that made it that much heavier. and after thA front wheel had pass. ed over. Martin thought ii was enough of a good thing and called a halt just as the rear wheel started the ascent
 II seems that Martin and his neigh bor. named Babcock. were out in the woods for the purpose of getting in their winter supply of wood
 When they started home it was dark. and as Martin was driving the horse and walking beside the wagon, he could not see plainly just where to plant his feet and tripped over a small stump. which threw him under the wagon. Before he could recov- CT himself sufficiently to stop the horse. the front wheel had passed over his body.
 He was immediately eXtricated from his fallen position and taken to his home, where, upon eXamina- tion, it was found that no bones werc broken.
 Sell We have a subscriber At Right on our list who owns a Time horse In fact. We have
 several subscribers who own horses. but this story is about only one of them He has been more or less worried for some time over the actions of his horse and is look ing for information that is authentic and cheap. He necessarily passes the buck up to the editor of this paper.
 The other day we received the following letter from him:
 "I have a horse that has been af- flicted for the past year with peri odical fits of dizziness. Please let me know what I should do with him. as he seems to get worse in stead of better. I am afraid he will be unfit for work if something is not done soon."
 Now. it is our desire as well as our business to help our subscribers in every way possible, and as we are not a veterinary. we would su2- gest that when the horse is looking alright sell him to someone
 Tears The preacher was a Get Our young man and nervous, Goat He was making an elO-
 quent plea for the home life, and was descending eloquently on the evils of the club, telling his congregation that married men in particular should spend their even ings at home with their wives and children. Think. my hearers" he said "Of the poor neglected wife, all alone in the dreary house, rock ing the cradle of her sleeping babe with one foot and wiping away the tears with the other"
 Talked There was a couple who It had two children, a boy Over. Of fourteen and a girl of
 twelve About that time another baby came along, With that prudishness so commonly found, the parents took the greatest pains that the children should know mo- thing about the condition of their mother or the impending event, and when the time approached the girl was sent on vacation to some rela- tives in another city At last the great event took place, and the father came and said to the boy; Johnny, you have a new baby bro ther.' The boy said nothing. The father sat down at his desk and in few moments handed the boy tele- gram. Take that to the telegraph office" he said, "and send it to sis ter Here is a dollar to pay the charges" The boy came back after willie and handed his father the change. "What,' said the father, chat telegram cost more than 35