The Hays free press. [volume] (Hays, Kan.) 1908-1924, 1915-09-18

would have thought he referred to a
dancing frock, but the picture was
ladylike enough.
Another merchant has a military
model for men with 1.-The body lines in
front and back accentuated in the
sharply taken-in-waist and close drape
over the hips" Corsets to match have
been ordered for the male figure.
oooo
DIR. H. B. Wood, city health officer
OF Topeka, would abolish the pie-eating
contest at rural fairs. In the past
these have been held chiefly in the
Capitol building at Topeka.
oooo
L. A. Congdon, hotel Inspector, pure
food and drug expert, sanitary expert,
and a state health officer, wants a
physical test to insure clean grocery
clerks. Next?
The regular patron of the Hays Pub
lie Library is distinguished from the
casual one by the ability to pass
through the door without pinching a
single finger.
The best Kansas Note in the Star
since the death of Charley Blakesley
appeared this week. 1t read, ''The
commission assigned to investigate the
attack on Mr.. Bryan at Kingman has
reported that the ex-secretary was not
warned. Obviously a note is now in
order"
The writer of the Kansas Notes now
is Clad H. Thompson, the son of Tom
Thompson of the Howard Courant.
And Clad is chip off the old ma
hogsny.
The old gag about citizen writing a
card of thanks to the city for quaran-
timing him while he had the smallpox
has been dug up by some Kansas editor
and the Kansas City Star and the Sal
ina Journal both fell for it.
oooo
The Mayor and council of Hays
passed an ordinance forbidding a drunk
man from operating any vehicle other
than one of muscular power. This is
neither LeaYenworth, Wichita, nor To-
peka.
Kansas editors will find the obituary
of John Shaw Dawson on page SOB of
Who's Who in America. The censor
will find therein this statement,
Author of much reform legislation in
Kansas since 1867
w. H. Taft makes a better ex-presi-
lent than he did a president.
oooo
While we do not think the Starbeams
are as polished as they were formerly,
we do believe that they are keener.
They represent a wide range. The
three best ones which have appeared
since the author of Skeedee Tavern
Talks has edited the column are these:
eff we could only see others as we
see ourselves how humanity would rise
in our estimation.
f'When a man is his own worst enemy
don't offer to mediate
"'I saw girl on the street yester-
day wearing those stylish roll stock
ings.'
'Blond-haired girl?'
I didn't notice.
Tom P. Morgan of Rogers, Arkansas,
now edits the Starbeams. Tom Per-
kins is a Connecticut boy, or rather was
about the time of the Civil War. For
years he has contributed to the leading
publications using humor, Life, Judge,
Puck, Smart Set, etc. He is the lead
ing misogynist Of the Mississippi Val
ley. Since the memory of man runneth
not to the contrary he has had stuff in
the Kay See Luminary. He wrote to
the Spectator once, sit may interest
you to know that am Tennyson J.
Daft, ]. Fuller Gloom. Alexander Akin
side, Hold Durnitt, Professor Lickland-
er, etc. If l were as talented as am
numerous I'd be living wonder and a
sight on earth. When asked why he
has not married Morgan once said, 81
have a talking machine and a mean
disposition, what more do 1 need to add
to my domestic felicities?''
oooo
Norton A. Turner, the editor of the
Russell Record, was in Hays this week
starting his daughter at the Normal.
She went to school last year in Phila-
delphia Turner told the Spectator
that Hays will have to wake up and
provide better facilities for aeeomo-
dating the Normal students.
oooo
Kipling tried to come back this week.
In describing the war the best he could
do was, "shrewish tang of the speeding
she'll" The most virile writer of the
age must have become henpecked.
oooo
Kipling also wrote In the article that
the recoil of the Is millimeter guns
twas as swift and as graceful as the
shrug of Frenchwoman's shoulders. -
An aS7fEovs21 4I,a