The Birmingham age-herald., 1915-01-22
AN OBJECT LESSON
 IN SA[ESMANSH|P Clarence Lloyd Buys a S9
 Bedspread for $1.75 HIGHWAY ROBBERY
Peddlers Invade Mayors Office and After Lloyd Buys Bedspread Ward Calls BOggan, Who Cops Money
 to Pay for License
By RALPH R. SILVER

Selling bedspreads might seem, at first blush, rather uphill business in these days of cannon balls and low priced cotton.
 Clarence Lloyd, secretary to Presi. dent George Ward of the city commis- sion, bought bedspread yesterday, however. and the last thing in the world he needed or the farthest thing in the world from his mind but a moment before he made the deal, Clar- ence admits, was that piece of per forated whiteness that Scudder Ryall took for a fish seine.
 That the main article of commerce in Syria was bedspreads was not known in Birmingham probably until yesterday afternoon. Yet two lusky gentlemen whose English vocabulary consisted of six words yesterday averred with an emphasis that was beyond dispute that such was the case. One behind the other they charged into the office of Secretary Ryall yester- day afternoon like a corps of Austrians might approach a Russian encampment in the Carpathian mountains. Before anyone noticed what was going or they had taken up positions about six feet apart and with arms extended held up large white sheet, all punched or torn full of holes, looking very much as if the neighbor's pup had been flirt- ing with it. That big sheet of holes is what Clarence Lloyd paid $1.75 for. but that's ahead of the story.
 The Affair Bepins
 Aug h. h. h-h-h Guck!"
 That's the first anyone else in the office noticed the pitched tents of the invaders. Scudder Ryall looked up.
 "Great purtyr hissed one of the end men. 'Buy?"
 "Too cold to fish now" said Scud- der.
 "wife, sister. girl. Like. Buy"
 "They don't fish"
 The Syrian or whatever he was didn't care whether Ryalrs wife and sisters fshed or not, for he gave the big white sheet a flourish and it attracted the attention of his honor, the mayor. He spat four times as he stood in the door and took in the situation. Then like rifle shot he issued orders:
 Call Boggan"
 As courier departed for License Collector Boggan the foreign legion made a second assault on the fortifi- cations. Pointing to the holes in the big sheet-in fact, they seemed to be sell ing holes more than anything else for about 90 per cent of the article would come under that class--the spokesman shrugged his shoulders at Clarence and said
 "Great purityw And that's where Clarence lost his generalship and made the wrong maneuver.
 How much you want?" he. asked.
 Mine dollars" said the dusky man with that sort of expression that made the big piece of holes seem as if 1t was worth $50. Clarence shook his head; so did Scudder.
 rian.
 "Six dollars" answered Scudder. Then chimed in the other end man in voice that sounded like the "E' string on a fiddle:
 .'votsamatter wityou?" -
 Scudder would give no more, so again
  five dollars" he said Then came the same fiddle string sentence:
 "votsamatter wityou?"
 An Impossible Offer
 "Ill give you 50 cents." said news paper man who hadn't seen 50 cents in four months.
 "votsamatter wityou?"
 I'll give you dollar" said Clarence.
 "Votsamatter wityou?" The expression on the faces of the two dusky skinned men would have been no better picture of outraged innocence had somebody offered to cut their throats They looked so pitiful. to think that anyone would offer them dollar for their $9 bunch of holes that the heart of Clarence futtered in sympa- thy. He couldn't stand 1t.
 "I-I-Tll give you $1.50," he stam- mered. It seemed only to increase the wounded feelings of the bedspread makers Clarence got desperate.
 I'll give you $1.75" he said with tears in his voice to think he'd offer such a sum for a 39 bcdspread.
 Like a flash the two Syrians folded up the big white piece of holes.
 T sell heem," said the original spok esman, showing the folded bed spread toward Clarence, who like Q man in daze counted out the money
 Just as he did so In walked Nemesis in the shape of Jim Boggan.