La Junta tribune., 1915-01-16
JOYS or THE WATER WAGON.
Fatty Lewis Ftstis tie wases We.
sDa = IA,aesone Vehicle How
6aeas Got Hin.

~ Lewis declared ~ he ordered .
short one. AT least not on my ac-
count
Il thought you were on the wa
son." Hurrah Smith remarked.
Same thing" Lewis replied: !:
I'm just drinking little beer oc-
casionslly.''
You're the guy that was going to
read everything In the library. get .
lot Of sleep and save money" said
Hurrah. Made lot OF speeches
knocking booze. said everybody that
drank was feeble minded and all that
sort OF thing. Did you get tired OF
readinE?"
Il got tired OF living like the Man
In the Iron Mask" Lewis replied.
Books may be fine company II you
have been raised with 'em and know
'em. But meeting them rs a stran-
ger Il takes long time to get ac-
quainted. u enjoyed reading. but
IL made me sleepy. The prohibition
lists amt provided many ways for a
guy that's taken the veil to amuse
himself. It's cinch the Dutch
Lunch Brigade can't use you. what's
guy going to do?''
How did you happen to Slip"
Hurrah inquired.
.'Oh. that old stiff they call Sa-
tan grabbed me one night when
wasn't looking" Lewis admitted. II
was tired reading and had laid my
book on the table. was sitting
there smoking. mindIng my own bus
mess and wondering what the gang
was doing down town.
What's the matter!' Satan In
quires why amt you down with
the bunch!'
I'm on the wagon. replied
proudly. I've cut out the boyd for
awhile. am getting too old to be
dubbinG round nights with . lot of
owls with castiron stomachs There's
nothing To Il. A guy just ruins his
health. He don't have time to do
anything else and besides II costs
too much. II I'm ever going to get
any place It's time ] was starting
4" You're absolutely right Satan
admitted. Cut Il out for awhile.
Give your insides . rest. You've
been hitting II up too strong"
"Must be . friendly old stiff. ''
Hurrah remarked. II always thot
Satan WAS . had actor"
lie 10 q had actor" Lewis ssVli-
ed. lie was just framing up on
me. but didn't find Il out until Ia
ter. n he ever comes monkeying
around you bounce = brick off his
noodle and run him away.
We'll. ! drtftcd along for . few
days and was all swclled up on my
self" Lewis continued. - could tell
to minute any time Of the day or
night just how long II had been
since ! took = drink. ! won't ray
I didn't kind Of have = hankerinE for
one. Hut Il WAS up TO me 10 demon
strate that Old Demon Rum didn't
have me In his grasp. had some
VIII power. Temptation sure was
thrown all around me. ] was invit-
I'd to 20 cabarcttins. Guys that
hadn't offered to buy 4 drink since
Ninth and Main was the southern
city limits wanted 10 pop. Several
Annette kciiermans came 10 the sur
face and insisted ON buying me some
thing In the way Of \ present. II
I'd been drinking they wouldn't have
even shook dice for the beer u I'd
spotted them the first horse. Hut
nothing doing. vas the Grand
Worthy President Of the Never Again
Club.
An the time old Satan WAS stand
Ing around pattins me on the hack.
That's the time he aays: show
them wcak-knesd brothers that
you've Got . viii power
Pretty soon ! realized that ! vas
losing my thirst and aceunulatins
lonssomeness. hadn't been invit-
cd 10 . poker game for three weeks.
Guys used 70 - even day never
came near ne. Everything wsa
turning green.
Why don't you drop into the
Dutchnan'ss' 0ataa suggested oas
day when the sun was shining bright.
and ] coulda't - u. Show tAeu
dubs thae you've really conquered
your thisst.
100 ahead 10 says glvins Ne Z
shove towards the DutcAnan's. 'You
caa take soustAins solt ilks butsss.
milk o. . white soda. ls'il e yeu
eoo1 - - ths old ouneh.'
II tsSsl H." l-evls a1nltle1. ~