The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1915-04-08

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NV build himself dormitory
v it is impossible to keel
the matter quiet 1t beat;
all how the news circulates from Beer
to Dansheba and back again, and he
soon begins to realize that most peo-
pie in this country are selling articles
which are absolutely essential to the
modern home. About a million differ
ent things are absolutely essential to
the modern home, and they all cost
like house afre.
The wiles of the people who have
such things for sale are interesting
and instructive. They know they
won't get cordial hearing if they
so they resort to all sorts of subter-
fuges to secure an audience. Mr.. Ike,
who is building new house, has been
on his guard against the oily tongued
statesmen for long time, but, not
withstanding his sleepless vigilance,
they get him every now and then.
The other day he was summoned to
the telephone and man at the hotel
called him up and asked him if he
didn't come from Squashville. Mr..
Ike replied, with tears in his voice,
that he did indeed originate at dear
old Squashville.
"Well, said the man at the hotel,
81 came from there and I'd like to see
you and talk about the good old burg.
Will it be all right if | go out to see
you at your house?"
"You bet your boots and other bag
gage" replied Ike. "Come right out
prepared to stay for dinner. l have
a million questions to ask you about
the old timers at Squashville.
In the course of an hour the stran-
ger arrived and was given welcome
that must have made him feel ten
years younger. Then Ike began firing
questions at him, and the strangers
were anything but satisfac-
tory or convincing. He didn't seem
to know anything about Squashville
or about its inhabitants. He seemed
anxious to change the subject.
II have heard" said he, "that you
are building new residence. In
which case l trust you will not be
guilty of the egregious folly of using
wood shingles. Wood shingles, my
lear sir, are responsible for 631s per
cent of the destructive fires in this
country. A cold day comes along
md you stoke up the stove, and the
sparks fly from the chimney and light |
IN those shingles, which are like tin
Ter, and then, poofl Your house is
zone, just like that, and when the
insurance adjuster comes along he
inds you weeping over the ruins. Now
,ur asbestos shingles are a perfect
"Get thee hence into the tempest
md the nights Plutonian shorel"
Mr.. Ike, and the stranger,
eeing that the interview was ended
eft by way of window, taking the
ash with him.
After this painful experience Mr..
Ike redoubled his precautions and
everal strangers with valises were
urned away from the door every day.
'ut the people who have absolutely
ssential articles for sale are masters
t strategy and in their bright lexi-
on there is no such word as "Fail," '
Though the word "Kale" appears in ,
lack faced type.
Mr.. Ike is a crank on horses and 1
as steed in which he takes great
ride. He will stand Dragging of that {
orse as long as anybody will listen J
D him and the surest way to make s
it with him is to say something nice 8
bout his family nag. He has little
It fenced in, back by the alley, for s
ne horse to play in, and few days /
go, when he glanced out of the win I
ow, he saw stranger of distinguish /