davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The fool-killer., 1915-06-01
SERMON ON THE LUSITANIA.

Now, looky here, you confound-
ed old red-eyed, snivelling sob
artists who have been weeping
such thunderation big salty wopes
over the sinking Of the Lusitania |!
Let me see if / can't pull your
doggoned red eyes open far e.
nough for you to see the Other
side of the picture. There is al
ways another side, you know, and
a man who refuses to look at
both sides is a one-sided fool.
Oh, yes, the sinking Of the Lusi-
tania and the killing Of all those
people was great calamity, and
[ am as sorry for it as anybody
ought to be. But / am not letting
my sorrow blind me to some other
mighty big facts that ought to be
emphasized.
The whole Internal war bus
mess is a horrible blot on our So
called civilization, but since it is
here we have got to recognize it's
presence and deal with it the best
way we can.
Look at the line just under the
heading Of The Fool-Killer and
you will see that "this paper, in
spite Of it's name, does not believe
in killing people. - Killing is
killing, it does not matter who
does it nor where it happens. In
my plain, blunt way, I call it MUIR
der, and [ don't care a dried-ap-
|ple cuss what you or anybody else
may call it, that don't change the
fact.
When man is killed in the reg
ular lawful manner in perfectly
well-ordered Christian battle, he
is just as dead as if he had gone
down in a sunken ship, and he will
stay dead just as long.
Well, then, dad-gum it, why are
we trying to start another Noah s
food with our tears over the
death of a few hundred Of the idle
rich who had no business on that
ship, in the first place, while we
read about the slaughter of hun
dreds of thousands on the field OF
battle with absolute unconcern?
| Of course this Lusitania affair
comes closer home to us because
some Of the victims were Ameri.
cans. We are. all mighty good
Christians, Of course, but WE
don't care a durn what happens
just so it don't happen to us.
But even at that I'll bet my
Sunday breeches against your in
terest in the Standard Oil Com
pany that there would have beer
mighty little weeping done excep1
for the fact that most Of the A
merican victims belonged to the
wealthy class and stood high II
" sawsiety.'' There must have
been a few steerage passenger;
lost, but [ haven't seen or hearc
much weeping over them. It''
the Vanderbilts, the Stones, the
Hubbards, and all them big bugs
that get the scare heads.
| They try to make you believe
The fool-killer., 1915-06-01

C1dI CHe uuSlLduId Was ueSCrOyeu
without warning. And that's
another lie. The German embassy
at Washington spent perhaps hun
dreds of dollars advertising in the
American papers that the Lusi-
tania and all other enemy mer-
chant ships were liable to destruc-
tion, and warning people not to
take passage on them. Besides
that, many individuals were pri-
vately warned just before the ship
sailed. One Of these was Alfred
Gwynn Vanderbilt. It is said
that he tore up the warning note
and threw it down without COM
ment. I say not warned!
/ And even if they had not been
warned, they ought to have had
sense enough to stay on their own
side of the earth during times like
these. Any blamed American fool
who wants to go to Europe during
this war should be made to go
strictly on his own risk, and if he
get killed he's paid for. The
United States government should
not be held responsible for any
thing that might happen to VEN
turesome ships or foolhardy pass
engers in the War Zone.
And that s why The Fool-Killer
is not in favor Of pitching into
war with Germany over the Lusi-
tania matter. Let us keep on our
own side and attend to our own
business. Let us have nothing
whatever to do with Europe until
she sobers up and gets fit for civ
ilized nations to deal with again
If she ever does.
am. not saying anything a.
gainst the Lusitania victims. They
were human beings, and their
lives were precious to them. But
the same is true of every mangled
corpse on every battlefield, and of
every woman and child who dies
Of hunger, destitution and grief,
brought about by this insane red
hell Of steel and fire and blood.
How would it better the situa-
tiQn if we would go ahead and
plunge our nation into the bloody
whirlpool, causing the death of
several million Americans, just be-
cause a hundre d or so ventured
where they had no business and
were lost? Will somebody please
tell me how that would help mat
ters any?
One more thought and I will
bring this sermon to close. If
the murder Of a few people is suf-
ficient cause for declaring war,
why in the very dickens didn' It we
fare up and declare war against
Rockefeller last spring, when he,
through his hired thugs, scattered
death and destruction among the
helpless families of the miners at
Ludlow, Colorado? Why didn I
we? A country that won't even
TRY to protect it's working peo-
pie right here in it's own territory
is a doggon purity thing to be
bowling for war when a handful
of rich adventures gollop off to
The fool-killer., 1915-06-01

the European War Zone hunting
for trouble-and find it.
Now, confound you, if I haven't
put it to you straight, let's hear
YOU tell it.
The fool-killer., 1915-06-01
ANOTHER "NOTE" TO GER
MANY.

[ see in the papers that you
have gone ahead and sunk the
Lusitania and destroyed more
than hundred American lives.
Now, looky here, Germany,
you know what l told. you. I
warned you good and plenty that
If you caused the loss of any A.
merican lives I would er-sorter
hint, maybe-um-er-thatyo you
perhaps oughtn't to-aw-
done it.
There was something said about
accountability, I be-
lieve, but I don't remember Just
what the expression means, and
under the circumstances, or-um
rather because of the whyness
Of the wherefore, I am in a po-
sition to prove that I didn t say
what I really did say.
Hence, in order to hold you to a
strict accountability" for the
aw-slight deviation from the
path Of the Christian warfare, the
honor and integrity Of my nation
compel me to dema-I mean sug-
gest-that you-er-don't do it
any more-unless you-aw-es-
pecially want to.
You should remember, my dear
Germany, that I am great
world-power, and that I am in the
habit Of giving orders and Of
having those orders OF mean-er
Laughed at. Maybe you remem-
ber my little dispute with my
dear friend Huerta, Of Mexico,
last spring. I kindly suggested to
Mr.. Huerta that it might beer
good for his health to-aw-so -sorter
salute my flag. And the meek and
humble manner in which he didn t
do it proved that at-well- -er-it
proved that that maybe he
didn t want to do it.
And I was just going to say, in
this connection, that you, my dear
Germany, reminded me so much Of
my good friend Huerta. In view
of my experience with him, I fell
deeply impressed that | can make
you do just exactly as you please.
Now in regard to your subma-
rine warfare and the killing Of
neutrals, permit me to say that
you will either have to quit it or
keep it up, one or the other. I'll
bet you don t dare to disobey that
order. If you do it will prove
that you are mentally diseased,
and [ will be glad to send you a
sample box of my new patent cure
all known as "Strict Accountable
ity." You can give it to Italy or
pour it in a rat-hole, whichever
you please.
Send me postal card stating
how you feel about it.
| Your friend,
UNCLE SAM.
The Clio messenger., 1915-06-18
We and the British Have Sweet Tooth

Britons have the sweetest tooth, and
Americans come next, II the statis-
tics for consumption Of sugar mean
anything. An Englishman eats annu-
ally 92.4 pounds, an American con-
sumes 1912 pounds. In Denmark the
average consumption is 1878 pounds
per capita; In Switzerland 1t is IS
pounds; in Germany, Holland, Swed-
en- and Norway it Is from 80 to A
pounds; In France, 35 pounds; In
Belgium, SO; in Austria, 24.2; in Rus
sia, 1913; in Portugal, 15.4; In Spain
and Turkey, IL; in Italy, Bulgaria,
Roumania and Serbia, from 6 to Z
pounds.
The principal reason for these varia-
tions Is found in the relative highness
or lowness OF the customs duties on
sugar and on the things with which 1t
Is commonly associated-coffee. tea,
etc.
The Clio messenger., 1915-06-18
Chocolate Soldiers.

The soldiers weakness for sweet
meats, to which Mr. Bernard Shaw
called attention when he wrote THE
Chocolate Soldier" has been abund-
.antly confirmed during the present
war. The quality of sweets con-
,sumed by our army in France has
been prodigious. while from Cairo
comes the news that the Australians
have absolutely eaten the place out
of chocolate. On the troopships
which brought them, too, 1t was the
same. Thus Captain Bean, the official
correspondent with the force, writes:
~Our canteen had five times the de-
mand for sweets and soft drinks that
was expected and one-finh the demand
for beer. Gazette.
The Clio messenger., 1915-06-18
How II Happened.

Il can't do a fool thing with that
dern camel" growled Noah, as he
came into the cabin for supper.
What Is the matter with him."
asked Mrs. Noah.
"Why. he didn't like the quarters
gave him, and he got his back up
about 1t, and he can't get 1t down
again.. replied Noah.
The Clio messenger., 1915-06-18
In the Upstairs Bedroom.

IN the UpstdIFs bcuFoOHI.
He can't do the maxixe."
~Goodnessi"
"He can't even Castle walk!"
~'Horrors! What stick"
''Hes ugly"
Hopeless"
HE has an auto and regular seats
at the show"
What's his ame?"-Texas Coyote.
The Clio messenger., 1915-06-18
A Vigorous Writer.

"Why does your mayor put on auto
mobile goggles before he writes?"
"To keep the ink from sputtering in
his eyes," - Munich Meggendorfer
Blaetter.
The Clio messenger., 1915-06-18

Red Cross Ball Blue, made in America,
therefore the best. delights the housewife.
AL good grocers. Adv.
The Clio messenger., 1915-06-18

poleonic blood in
his veins. He was
personally brave,
he established a
brilliant court at
the Tuileries and
promised to revive
the Napoleonic glo-
ries Of France In
peace, not in war.
The Clio messenger., 1915-06-18
Twas Ever Thus.

"Have you been operating in the
stock market Of late7"
"No I've been operated upon
Judge.
The Clio messenger., 1915-06-18

should have chosen one of their
countrywomen.
However, in the end Eugene was
received In all the courts of Europe.
Napoleon won Victoria of England,
very conservative queen and Eugenie
made a conquest of Victoria's hus-
band, Albert. France and England
fought against Russia In the Crimea
Napoleon and Eugene visited Lon
don and the man who had been
police officer on it's streets was now
received with royal honors and de-
clared an emperor by the grace or
God. The beautiful woman who had
run the gamut of life in every large
city of Europe and who had swal-
lowed backing in an attempt at sui
eide was now an empress, welcome
everywhere. She was thrice made
regent Of France when her husband
was out with his army. She repre-
sented France at the opening OF the
Suez canal in 1869. She had the es-
cort of the khedive at the first per-
formance of the opera "Aida," for
writing which Verdi got $4,000 francs.
In many wise she had been her hus'
bands evil genius. She had urged
him to set up Macmillan as emperor
of Mexico that she might patronize a
people speaking her native tongue.
When Maximilian fell the star of Ma
poleon also waned.
It was the empress party" in the
chamber of deputies that forced the
war of 1870 upon France, though Ma
poleon knew his country was not pre-
pared for war with Germany. After
Gravelotte and Sedan he would have
returned to prepare for the defense
of Paris as Joffre retreated after the
defeats of Liege, Mons, Charleroi, La
Cateau and Maubeuge, but Eugenie
imperiously commanded him to re-
trieye his fortunes in the field. Then
she disobeyed his most positive in
The Clio messenger., 1915-06-18
MAX mok. rsSss.sS1OTO DAY

Selling the most wonderful fire extinguisher
price $3.oo-that was ever put on the
market. Everyone Is prospect Sells on
sight; big profits Exclusive selling contract
covering one or more counties is yours il
you can qualify. Address Department c, r..
The Clio messenger., 1915-06-18

Agents and Collect fSF h9TseeSa sSn,
sells on sighti so upward earned weekly just that
way. Justlns Dstrg Co., So. Wabash, Chicago, Ill
The Clio messenger., 1915-06-18

GET THE LATEST. Rixie Temperance drink.
Taste like wine. Contain no alcohol. Agents
wanted Rixie Spec. Co., Milwaukee. WIS.,
The Lakeland evening telegram. (Lakeland, Fla.) 1911-1922, 1915-01-14
1915 WILL BE ERA OF
GOOD ROADS, SAYS
F. 0. MILLER.

/. - Miller, president OF the
FLORIDA State Good Roads Asso-
ciation, believes that the coming
Year will be one OF bebtter roads
tor the state Mr.. Miller is one
at the pioneers in the good roads
movement, as he believes good
highways and development go
hand III hand. He also believes
that Florida can attract thous-
and> II motorists in the winter
ahl " good system OF roads.
VI. Miller is much elated that
me hard-suriaccd road TO Fer
nand.na has been opened Tor
,Faf''s with the completion Of the
dra"hridSc over Amcla river. as
wen a. with the early prospect
Tyr t1e completion OF the high
Way T. II Augustine.
= tbs latter connection il !
IL hat Cap' lanes Y. Wilson.
contractor states that ii he
weather remains ia arabic. the
.aI .em s.. Nl9u>tiac across
INNS county i Duval coun,
VI 3,e completed within the
svN. w seeks
The Lakeland evening telegram. (Lakeland, Fla.) 1911-1922, 1915-01-14

the plans of the State &.
Roads Association, which
working for a highway comm
sion, will be outlined.
In Sandford they will law
meeting with the lake region
vision of the Florida State Fl
Association. Enlisting the
sistance of the state press mi
fight to create and uiiy sentint
for good roads will be the p
pose OF the meeting. 1t is
lieved that there will be MI
Der of men of influence pres
at this session.
President F. O. Miller, Of
state association, is enthusll'
IN connection with the am
here Of Mr.. Fote. who will .
duct the educational campalT
the state. At a conference y
terday he outlined his lde''
connection with the work aA1
connection with the work a'a
\ large number of mee1
will be held. including seS>ia,'
kuStis and TavareS, as well 4
other PAGES.
The Lakeland evening telegram. (Lakeland, Fla.) 1911-1922, 1915-01-14
BROUGHT BACK TO FIORIDA
ON PERJURY CHE

United States Marshal Bal''
of Detroit, arrived in lacEs'1
this morning. bringing with a'
Wildfong. who is wanted y
United States court as u
from Tampa. on a perjury 81
This charge is a result q, +
Abbott mail robbery
heard some time ago, +
defendant hal three
fcing acGuittc
Tampa this a. aaon
fong will he COMMITTEE
~hal Behrendt is acco9~
father. White in
Marshal Browns or
was proudly 1'spi1v
BADGE Of solid cold, ?
presented to him
friends in the town
Mich. The badee Ia WV
diamond. of the purest rs
its center, while the whole
mounted by a golden AZ
eagle, with outstretchea VIE
Detroit marshal also wears
pin, showing his standins as
Der of the honorary chiefs e
OF the city of Detroit.
The Lakeland evening telegram. (Lakeland, Fla.) 1911-1922, 1915-01-14
: TATE IA PRES WILL BE ASK.
70 TO JOIN FIGHT FOR
BETTER HIGHWAYS,

hat they aim to put the mat
IS, s., :: Sood roads squarely up 10
~ =, citizens OF the lake region Of
c T ioTlda i the statement Of !. P.
S ~ S>' secretary OF the Flor.
,aa State Good Roads Assoc;..
non y, and Chasles E. Foote, SPEC &c
IaL publicity agent. who 'p w;ll
S save tais morning for a quick to
1Ri21d and other places N whs -
The Lakeland evening telegram. (Lakeland, Fla.) 1911-1922, 1915-01-14

We have fresh load of mules and
horses. We have one hundred head
to pick from and have lots of second
hand wagons and buggies and har-
ness for sale cheap. Come to see US.
1866. WILSON BROS.
The Lakeland evening telegram. (Lakeland, Fla.) 1911-1922, 1915-01-14

We are just finishing another ot
those bungalows in Ozone Park,
modern throughout. Only six blocks
from Main street. If you are want.
ing home, see us. We develop our
own property and so can give you
the best price Either cash or on
easy payments.
We also have several bunEalows
10 rent in other parts OF the city
Il You are interested, call at Room .,
over the postofiice or phone 35S. W.
F. Nichols & son. 1888
The Lakeland evening telegram. (Lakeland, Fla.) 1911-1922, 1915-01-14

The linen trade In Du1iSI
Scotland, consular district, sY
ally decreasing. owing to TIE
lily Of the manufacturers 70
the raw material. -
The Lakeland evening telegram. (Lakeland, Fla.) 1911-1922, 1915-01-14

my y main artery, continuous,
connected and impoved.
lLCOSlER MOTOR CLUB.
" ). Gllbreath, Secretary.
The Lakeland evening telegram. (Lakeland, Fla.) 1911-1922, 1915-01-14

Silver cups offered by the Polk
County Fair Association are now on
display at Cole & Hull's. They are
offered for the best display of citrus
fruits and vegetables for any town
in the county. Best display poultry,
best display Asiatic poultry, best
display Mediterranean poultry.
The Lakeland evening telegram. (Lakeland, Fla.) 1911-1922, 1915-01-14

Argentina is one country in which
no coal is mied.
The Lakeland evening telegram. (Lakeland, Fla.) 1911-1922, 1915-01-14

llI00n Pine, $500 per strand Fire
MIIIII place. 81 so load. Oak = IS
UOOU per strand. Phone 800
The Lakeland evening telegram. (Lakeland, Fla.) 1911-1922, 1915-01-14
WILLIAMS BARGAIN COUNTER

WILL EXCHANGE 1914 Oakland
touring car in perfect condition
for smaller car or real estate. This
is one of the best cars in the coun-
try and a BARGAIN
NEW FIVE ROOM BUNGALOW and
lot. on Hancock ST. in New Dixie
land. Am Offering this at the bar :.
gain of $1,000 for quick sale.
l.-Nice 5-room house. II 1-2
acres in cultivation. IL acres
bearing orange trees. tangerine and
piant. With Several acres finest truck
land. This is beautiful place Dor
dering on city limits of Lakeland.
Price $4,000. Terms can be had.
2.-1O acres good truck and citrus
land convenient to public hard sur
face public road. | mile to shipping
point. Price. $50 per acre.
3.-6-room cottage. southern ex-
Dosure. four blocks from depot. one
block of school. electric lights toilet.
bath; Rents for $40 per month. Price
81, 800. Terms if wanted
4.-Beautiful building lot. so foot
front, 100 back. on PRINCIPAL street.
with fine lake front. Price $500.
For sale, or will exchange for city
property. 1913 five passenger Over
land automobile in excellent condi
ton.
New 7-room bungalow and % lots
adjacent to DiXieland. all for $1,000
for quick sale.
G. ]. WILLIAMS.
Phone 242 Red
The Lakeland evening telegram. (Lakeland, Fla.) 1911-1922, 1915-01-14
LABOR NEWS AND NOTES

The number of women BARRIERS /!
increasing in the South.
The Lakeland evening telegram. (Lakeland, Fla.) 1911-1922, 1915-01-14
WE HAVE EXPERT Ford mechanics
and are prepared to take care Of
all repairing of Ford cars in most
up to date name. Lakeland
Automobile and Supply Co. 3069
LAKE FRONT FOR SALE

20 acres on the beautiful Scott
lake about 200 feet lake front, good
land, especially adapted for truck
ing and citrus fruit, on south side Of
lake. best protection, price $50 per
acre. terms can be arranged on part
of it. Write or see
w. P. READ,
1861 Mulberry, Fla.
The Lakeland evening telegram. (Lakeland, Fla.) 1911-1922, 1915-01-14
.>ss..eese%sa .+++++++ ss@~--s++s+-+~+<%
/ CLASSIFIED Adpe1tising
CHRISTMAS BOX

Delicious Golden Grimes Apples,
in boxes ready for delivery any
where in town. $50 to the box. Call
292 Black.
CRUTCHFIELD co.
The Lakeland evening telegram. (Lakeland, Fla.) 1911-1922, 1915-01-14

An ash can to which a handle can
be attached to convert it into a lawn
roller has been patented
The Lakeland evening telegram. (Lakeland, Fla.) 1911-1922, 1915-01-14

The Michigan Central will employ
short runs.
The Lakeland evening telegram. (Lakeland, Fla.) 1911-1922, 1915-01-14

Shanghai recently saw the open.
ing of the first street car system fl
nanced. constructed and operated
solely by Chinese
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1915-06-25
London Believes Polish Capital
Germans New Objective.
PetrOgrad Thinks Her DefenseS
Well Nigh Invulnerable.
NO TROOPS TO OTHER FRONTS
Russia to Checkmate Kaiser's
Plan to Withdraw Men.
Campaign for Munitions On in
Full Swing in England.

London, June 25.-11:45 a. M
Something in the nature of a lull in
the fighting compared to the fever
ish activity of the last fortnight is
enabling the military observers on
both sides to take stock of the present
situation and forecast future opera
tons.
Slaves Bank on Defenses.
Petrograd claims that the Russian
defensive positions are so secure that
to withdraw many troops for use
against the allies of Russia. The Rus
slams assert further that their present
line before Warsaw is strong as it
ever was and that their armies on the
River Dniester will fall back only if
the eastward drive of the Austro-Ger-
mans from Lemberg threatens to cut
them off.
The authorities of the central en-
pires are less communicative con-
corning their future intentions. but it
is believed that Warsaw again is their
objective.
Campaign for Munitions.
In England the campaign for NUM-
tons is in full swing, with the posi-
bility of national registration to ascer-
tain the man power" of the nation.
That England appreciates the need
of adding to her fighting resources is
significantly indicated by the publica-
ton in the London Times of tables
showing that the casualties of officers
during the last month come within a
few hundred of the total officer
casualties during the entire South
African war.
The total in South Africa was 2,752.
while the lists since May 20 show that
2,44O officers have been killed or
wounded or reported missing.
Bix-."Scientists claim now that gege-
tables have feelings em9tions Pix.
with swelled heads."-Boston Transcript.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1915-06-25
HIDE TRUSTY FROM MOB
Negro Suspect in Prison Murder Not
Taken to Jail.

Joliet, I'LL, June 25.-Fear that vio-
lence might be visited on Chicken
joe Campbell, the negro convict ac-
cused of the murder of Mrs. Odette
Allen, wife of the warden of the
prison here, if he were removed to
the Will county Jail to await grand
jury action, is the influence which is
keeping the accused man in his SOIL
tary cell in the penitentiary.
It was decided last night that the
usual procedure of taking persons
awaiting trial to the Jail be followed,
but today it was considered best to
keep the man in prison where he
would be safe from possible mobs.
While Campbell was held by the
corener's jury to the grand jury, he
was not formally charged with the
murder.
The jury did not reach a decision as
to whether others should be held to
the grand jury in connection with the
murder.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1915-06-25
To Put On Flesh
And Increase Weight
A Physicians Advice

Most thin people eat from four to 81!
every day and still dc. not increase In
weight one ounce, while on the other
hand many of the plump, chunky folks
eat very lightly and keep gaining all the
time. It's all bosh to say that this is
the nature of the individual. 1t isn't
Natures way at all.
powers Of assimifation are defectiTe.
They absorb just enough of the flood
they eat to maintain life and SEM
blance of health and strength. Stuffing
won't help them dozen meals a day
won't make them gain a single stay
there pound. All the fat-producing eIe-
ments Of their food just stay in the in
testines until they pass from the body as
waste. What such people need is some,
elements SO that their blood can absorb
them and deposit them all about the
body-something, too, that will multiply
their red blood corpuscles and increase
their bloods carrying power.
For such a condition / always recon-
mend eating Sargol tablet with every
meal Sargol is not as some believe, q
patented drug, but is a scientific COM
bination of six of the most effective and
powerful flesh building elements known
to chemistry. 1t is absolutely harmless.
vet wonderfully effective and a single
tablet eaten with each meal often has
the effect of increasing the weight of a
thin man or woman from three to five
pounds a week. Sargol is sold by Arnold
Drug Co. and other good druggists every
where on a positive guarantee Of weight
increase or money back--Ady.