Connecticut western news., 1915-12-02
The Wurra Wurra Club


 Among those present were all the above. mentioned, besides the later corners, as follows, and when all had entered who wished, the meeting was called to order by the first assistant deputy president, MT. A. II. Herriman, who was out ot town somewhere buy ing horse, and unable to be present. It took the secretary fifteen minutes to call the roll, owing to the great success of the committee on membership in boosting the campaign for new mem- bers, after the example set by the B. M. A. The minutes of the next meet. ing were read by Sam Camp, who had not yet returned from fishing expedi. tion; hence they were omitted and ap- proved. George Ford was delegated to sing the opening Ode, but he didn't sing it. He thought he dld, but he didn't. In his attempt he was accom- panied by Ovid Gillette on his coffee percolator.
 The vacant chair then called for motions, or resolutions, or anything else that any member might have on his stomach, and Bert Brewer got up, pulled down his vest, stuck out his chin, and asked if anybody present could give him any information as to how, when and bv whom he was going to be paid for housing and caring for the invalid billy cop in his equine hos. pital
 Major J. O. Rorahack got up, pulled down his chin, stuck out his vest and asked Brewer what nature of obliga. tion the billy cop was mourning, up in that barn. ''Is the bill going to be for storage? or for surgical attendance? or for rent ? or for nursing or what ?" inquired the mayor. "It seems to me it will be time enough to talk about paying the bill when the billy cop is able to report for duty again at the Main and Railroad street corner. I for one would like to hear a report on the billy cops present condition, and whether he is recovering from the shock of his abduction and drowning"
 MT. Brewer replied that the billy cop was no worse, and appeared to be hold ing his own; his head was still off, but he thought they might be able to save his one foot and the thing the lantern hung oG, by keeping the barn locked nights. He said the billy cop might go back to his beat any time, but would have to stand upside down for a while.
 The sexton declared the subject not properly before the house, and the in- cident was closed.
 The fat member, without trying to stand up, said he would like to offer a motion that all the members who could read and write be requested to get up petitions to the selectmen.
 "Petitions for what ?' demanded Ned Roberts.
 ''It don't make no difference what. !" replied the fat member. Petitions fir anything, firm mosquito nettin' bedquilts in tn lookup, t arbitratin' tn war in Europe Tn selectmen has got time t read petitions, an they's money i'll tn town treasury that hain't spent yet. No member O this Club is doin' his patriotic duty as law-abid- in citizen unless he gifts up petition fir suthin' am sends it to tn select men. They's things enough to peti- tion for, am tn selectmen ort t have their 'tention called to lem. Bi-annual 'lections fir selectmen; free telephones fir all tn voters; lower insurance rates; compulsory Sunday church tendance; universal female suffrage fir ladies only; bount'es on cock reaches; uniform prices for beefsteak, 'lectric power, shingle-nails, pianos am gimlets; licenses fir quick an dirty lunchrooms; free transp'tation f'r-"
 ''I would like to be kind enough to have somebody tell me if the portly gentleman observations have refer ence to allusions, or in the event of it's being otherwise, as seems to be the case provided the trend of his thought is to be accepted as a criterion, and if so, what ?" remarked Clarence Humphrey, rising to point of order.
 The sexton observed that the infer ence seemed to be justified. and acting upon that impulse he blew out the lights aud the crowd had to go home. n o1,,rga m taanh hagk