Evening star., 1915-01-03

seriously to heart by the modern clergyman;
for the frequenter Of clerical society will
find that the ministers of today are willing
to joke and to be joked in a fashion that
would probably have utterly scandalized
some of their predecessors.
Indeed, there is a story of good woman
who, for the sake of the godly example to-
her growing son, invited houseful of cler-
gvnen during a conference session, and
whose grief at their ight-minded table
talk was assuaged only by her meditation
upon the inexplicable improving influence
that they seemed to be exerting upon the
boy
One needs sense of humor to bear with
smiling fortitude some of the slams occa-
sionally handed the modern preacher.
when l grow up one minister's son con-
fides to his mother, I'm going to be a min
ister-or Christian"
"Why,7 inquiries the visitor addressing
the Sunday School, "do people call ME a
Christian? Because they don't know
you," whispers shrill, small voice.
Are there any Episcopalians about
here?7 asks the travelling clergyman. "Wal,
| dunno confesses the embarrassed native.
"The hired man killed some kind O critter
out behind the barn the other day; but
We kind O lowed it was woodchuck.
More searching was the criticism of the
pastor who said "Yes, the Bishops ser
mon was apostolic. He selected a text, and
then went everywhere preaching the gospel
Life has gone to the length of making the
matter personal. 1t recently showed pic
ture of Robinson Crusoe meditatively re-
ciding not to look up the imprinter. "Of
course he reflects, "it may be Man Fri
day; but then, on the other hand, it may be
Billy Sunday
NEEDLESS to say, large part of the
~ gibes cast at the clergy have to do with
the vexed question of verbosity. @How many
long -winded speakers are we to have at our
meeting this afternoon?' the late Bishop Pot
ter confessed to having asked the president
of a woman's organization. "Oh, she re-
Piled charmingly, "you are the only one"
Scotland, the birthplace of SO many ex-
cellent clerical stories, furnishes the anec-
dote of the old lady whose coachman was
wont to slip out near what he supposed to
be the close of the sermon in order to have
her carriage ready. One Sunday, having
become impatient but being somewhat in
doubt, he whispered his mistress, as he
no dune yet?"-"Dunc?" retorted the i1dig-
nant old lady. Hes dune half an hoor
since; but he'll no STOP"
The unkindest cut of all was that of the
janitor who had remained until he was the
last member of a congregation that had
dwindled away as the pastors discourse
heightened Finally he tiptoed up to the
pulpit and tucked beneath the corner of
the Bible note. 1t read, when you are
through will you please turn off the lights,
lock the door, and put the key under the
matt
In arniable contrast may be cited the re-
tort courteous of President Hadley, who,
when asked by a visiting clergyman how
long he would be expected to speak at the
services in Yale College Chapel, replied,
"There is no limit, Sir, upon the time you
may preach; but there is Yale tradition
that most souls are saved during the first
twenty minutes"
NEXT to verbosity the most numerous
~ pungencies are doubtless those dealing
with such slips of the tongue as any public
speaker, and more particularly any young
public speaker, may sometimes make. Such
was the opening sentence of a theological
students first sermon, Looking backward,
down the dim vistas of the future, we can
not fail to discern the indelble footprints of
an almighty hand
Such was the peroration Of another neo-
Dhvte who oratnrica11v eyclairoed @RlOt ont