The Oskaloosa herald. (Oskaloosa, Mahaska County, Iowa) 1885-1919, 1915-03-18

tllIOdSu Inc Siluct SO the fLOuSIdDOub
will let the native sons tell of some
of taa ways taat are aboriginal with
the 'turquois skies of Beautiful Col
orado."
Yes sir. we launched the Big Graft
mine, and spent 100000 in advertis-
ing it ali over the country. We sold
about 100000 worth of stock at 10
cents a share before we had hole
In the ground big enough to hide
prairie dog. Then we obtained five
mining claims at $500 per claim and
began to huns for ore. But real work
soon became irksome and we. sold
out at 10 cents on the dollar to an
other company. We held more than
half The stock and made big 'holler'
about stockholders refusing to put
up an assessment made against them.
Then We sent them all circulars that
We had made what we thought was
fine sale to bigger company, and
each one of the five of US got about
$4,000 apiece out of the deal ami re.
tired"
We'll We we're not quite so lucky
with our land deal, but we made good
money just the same out of the pro-
ject. We bought a big tract of land,
in the richest agricultural district of
the west, according to our circulars,
and sold it on the lottery plan. Each
subscriber put in 500 and was to get
prize of from one to 100 acres OF
land. There were no blanks, and with
each prize we threw in a building lot
in the town site. The capital prize
was a Whole section of land, located
on the highest ground in our holdings.
1t was volcanic ash soil, just like a
seiVe, and so dry ten months in the
year that you would have to drive a
stake to locate where you had pour
ed bucket of water two minutes be-
fore. Well, we located lot OF people
on it and left them to work out their
own salvation while we went into
otAec business with $4,000 cash in
hand"
or course there are good lands and
good mining companies in Colorado,
but they are not the ones you find
advertised on the tri-cOlored circulars
with gilt edges. If you want to buy,
go and look, and look well before you
buy.
AS, we, no doubt, look as funny to
other people, as some of those whom
We meet look to Us, We never feel
conscious stricken in calling about
them. For instance there was the
girl in the dining car who put four
big dominoeS of sugar on her sliced
bananas and munched the pieces as
she went along Then there was the
lady who hunted from one end OF the
sleeper to the other for the porter
Notwithstanding the push buttons at
each berth. She talked so loud too,
that everybody knew her troubles.
She had lost switch of her own
hair,-but she would not care for the
loss so much only Mary made it for
her, and it just finished out nicely
when she wanted to be particularly
we'll dressed. \ -~.t'
Then there was the cheerful fellow
who was going to getof at six O'Clock
in the evening and Jay over at Sailda
until morning. He Was not going to
take any chances on the old ID. 4 r.
G. which mad had four bad wrecks in
three days. A doctor aboard, headed
for Salt Lake to make an address be-
fore a medical society, praciicad his
piece on US. He wanted the Govern
ment to take over and run all the
hospitals after the style OF the Post
offices, -with a hospital in each town
to fit the size of said town. He would
cut off the fancy salaries paid to the
POStmasters, hire some one to do the
work and save enough to carry out
his pet theory. Our mail is very i'm
portant," he SAIL but is not the
health of the people of more import
ance?" We wondered what the socie-
ty of medical freedom would think Of
him and went to bed 10 obtain re-
lief.
Then there was the Old guy who
had just married a younger wife, and
he was making her acquainted with
the various members of his family
and incidentally revealing to her
what a great man he was. He was in
terested in three different enterpri3-
es, any one of which would make him
a living, but he was going to hang on
to all of them so he would not want
in his old age, and theevidence would
convict him of having passed his 10th
His especial grievance was
against q neice who had bought an
$50 fur coat on the installment plan,
and her husband never earned over
$12 per week in his life. After paying
in about SIS they had to let the coat
go back to the dealer and got along
by cutting some OF the tail off of her
last years coat Then there was the
other fellow who upon every oppor-
tunity expressed the opinion that
Utah was the most Col forsaken
country he ever saw" No one cared
to argue with him, but we all wonder
ed if he had ever been in Western
Texas. Utah is not a garden spot by
any means, but is not the worst that
ever happened. If we had one of those
big cliffs of clay within ten miles OF
we would build the inter-
urban to it and point out to visitors,
the 8th wonder of the world.
- - -.
Then there was the fellow who was
always too hot or too cold and who
never rode over such rough road
before. OF the last remark We stood
u,a I.aliaua No