The Washington herald., 1915-11-14
ARIZONA KICKLETS
Always Liuely Times at Giueadan1 Gulch.

An Eastern paper says that an Ari-
Zona editor who was IN Chicago this
winter blew oul the gas and was al
most a-goner when his room was
broken into. 1t wasn't US We al
ways light our way with a tallow
candle when in Chicago.
Some $50 of our LOCAL subscribers
Next week we shall start on a col
well oiled and loaded. Have your
money ready when we call
In trying to shoot Jack rabbit in
the suburbs Of the town yesterday
James Daily killed and had to pay
Childers. II Mr.. Daily had carried
out the threat he once made OF shoot
ing US on sight. We wonder how many
innocent citizens would have gone
down before his fusillade-
The attempt to introduce blue-bor-
this town has been a miserable fail
ure, as IL deserves TO be. Good old
red stripes are good enough tor any
body. and they give society the firm
ness Of a REORGANIZATION
Old Major Harrington came into the
Kicker" office the other day to ask
licked China out of her boots. We
started in to explain matters as best
we could. but he got impatient and
major was never a hand to UNDER
stand statesmanship.
other day that Dave Sullivan. the ex-
stage driver, had teen devoured by
a mountain lion in the Red Tree hills.
As Dave isn't to be found at any of
no mt a he
but we'll bet the lion passed a bad
hour after his meal Dave is about
the toughest thing We know Of in
have studiOusly avoided him.
We do not receive rattIesnakes at
the postoffice as mail matter even
when they are in a torpid state and
springs tied around their tails TO han
die them by. II our people will re-
member this, IL will save disappoint-
ment We are willing to oblige. even
to rattlesnakes. but the postal laws
must be observed.
Last week we were one of the COM
mittee OF four that sought TO raise
$500 to give the town waterworks-
The total sum subscribed in the entire
Wen be hanged II We waste any more
wind over the matter. II citizen
wants TO lie down on his stomach and
collect microbes from omahawk
49,
Our esteemed contemporary denies
that he was ever in jail in Indiana
man who steals COW and drives her
OF has got to hustle around and have
common sense enough TO dodge the
mudholes and thistle patches along the
highway. who could have starteo
such a baseless rumor?
His Honor the Mayor Cwho is our
nh1iURd throw linn Car
other day and break his leg. jim
had got too fresh and was VAS Playin
his feet all over our official desk. We
don't like to go back on any OF the
boys, but we have a certain official
dignity to maintain
Three nights ago as We were re-
turning at late hour from Mrs
hog living on the sidewalk and landed
on our head and remained there in a
dazed condition for ten minutes II
this were a tws1ueth century com
thing be-" As II is not, We warn all
hog owners that We shall open fire
on the next porker which lies in am
bush for US
Wednesday afternoon one of the
guests at the Roaring Lion Hotel OBJ
eI 1S sGd Mf sOu Ra aaG the h
landlord. had bullet pillow through
his whiskers. Cold soup is one OF the
idioms of the Roaring Lion. and Mr..
Harper is not the man to innovate for
the sake OF one traveller from the ef-
fete East
II the critter who fred a bullet into
the postofice window Tuesday even
ing as we lay dreaming on our cot
will call again. We will try to make
things pleasant sad Tor nv hi on,v h an o innS
which was pretty fair for random
shot we got tangled up in one OF
our nightshirts or he would be walk
ing with a limp today
Word reached town the other day
that John Gilmartin. farmer resi-
in Colorado. We knew the deceased
why he shouldn't have been
At Mrs. Major Johnson's high tea
drops in the punch and knocked out
about forty guests oTt al re ree S ,Sd
work OF some parvenu who was in
cited by Jealousy.
The Lone Jack Recorder" says that
we shoot the business men OF Give
adam Gulch into the BELIEF that ad-
vertising pays Well; we nave shot
far as we know. each one is getting
a good return for his investment Some
merchants can be argued with, and
some must be shot. and an editor must
be equal to the occasion
We were invited to deliver an ad-
dress on The Men Of Our Times" at
we began IL in the presence of 500
Intelligent and enthusiastic people.
when $50 OF the crowd began whoop-