davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-12-30
Little Fables of the Business World

of cheroots Went Up in Smoke.
The next day, though he felt a little
Too Proud to Fight he cut loose with
the last of the Picked Victims for that
day just before he Turned Out the
light and Pulled the Covers over his
Head.
From then on his Batting Average
Fell.
But when the Evening Of the Last
Day of the Dying Year rolled round.
he was still At 1t. He had about con-
cluded that this business Of New Year
Resolutions was all b. s.-meaning
Bird Seed; but he was Going to Die
Game. 1t would be a Long Time.
etc. as the Governor Of North Caro-
lima said to the Gov'nor Of s. C.
So. with what was left, he Sat Down
in his Room and tried to Consume
them, one eye on tho clock. 1t was
Strictly a Watch-night Affair.
Presently, as the Fatal Hour drew
near. he began to Enjoy Them.
Already he had Smoked himself
Black in the Face. and he knew he
couldn't get any Blacker.
Then-the Hour Struck and the
Whistles whistled.
He hurled My Lady Nicotine out
the Window and
There were still Few Dozen left.
Moral: - Though it sometimes
works in Mysterious Ways, there does
seem to be some sort of Providence
that looks out for Janitors. Mail Car
riers, Elevator Boys, Street Car Con-
ductors and Friends who smoke CO
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-12-30
Bought Herself a Trousseau

cause you did not marry is no reason
why you should not have your share
of wedding presents. You have given
lots of wedding presents, you should
receive few at least whether you
marry or whether you do not. l am.
therefore, sending you this morning
two silver candlesticks and a gold
framed triple mirror, which represent
the amount of money / should have
expended on you had you seen fit to
wed some nice man. Goodbye Emily,
and many happy returns of the day"
At this the spinster laughed until
she cried, having II sense of humor.
Then as the responsibility of having
a fiftieth birthday began to dawn
upon her again and she threatened
to grow melancholy an inspiration
seized her. I'll buy myself u trous-
seau,' said she, that's what l will do,
III buy myself q trousseau"
! And she did. She drew out of the
savings bank the money which long
ago she had put in it for Just such
purpose and which recently she had
thought of dovoting to foreign mis-
sions and she went out to the shops
land INDUCED in the most blissful orgy
of shopping any woman ever had. She
bought herself pink lingerie and fluffy
peignoirs, and boudoir caps trimmed
with tiny roses, and high heeled
mules all brocaded and dainty-all
the things in fact which the most ex-
travagant bride buys for her outfit
Then she went home tired and happy.
II am fifty years old and don't look
| It," said she to herself that night as
she unpacked her treasure, "and |
have lovely trousseau and some very
handsome wedding presents. All that
! Is missing is the bridegroom, and
since it is agreed by all authorities
that he is the least part of every we'd
ding, l am not missing anything by
his absence. He would probably drink
anyway. To have all of the advan-
tages and none Of the disadvanta ges
of matrimony is what l call being
/ strictly lucky"
And after this she went to sleep
quite cheerfully and did not bother
a bit about the fact that she had
passed the half-century mark.
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-12-30

trying to Keep Up with the War News
with Gazetteer. or Symphony Con-
certs. or going to see Mary Pickford,
or even staying In his room on q Sat-
urday Night. He could have Picked
Out few Resolutions Of that sort.
But he was a Serious Lad and he
wanted to Do 1t Right. So he fas-
tened on Something Hard. He Re-
solved to Tin-Can the Smokes. Which
Is to say that On and After the stroke
of Midnight on the S1st day of De-
cember he and the Fragrant Weed
would pass by and Not Speak.
All this, mind you. happened few
days before Christmas. Which, he
figured. would Give him Time to Get
Used to 1t, to Go into Training as it
were. before the Bell Rang.
And by way of Practice he would
frequently lead himself right up to a
Show-Window where a few hundred
"Dusky Beauties as r. Kipling has
called them, were Staring him in the
Face. He'd look 'em back, too. right
Between the Eyes with a Stony Stare.
And after a while he even Got So he
could Thumb his Nose at 'em before
Lighting the One Cigar he'd allowed
himself - Reduced Ratlons - before
dinner.
Then. along came Christmas. And
Our Hero swore softly. There was a
Reason:
Friend AL came across with a Box
of his choice Smokes.
The Home-folks included a few OF
Fathers Favorites in their Christmas
Package.
| The Boss left a Box of Fifty-Cent-
ers on his desk Christmas Eve.
And She, being a practical sort, let
Appearances and Conventions go hang
and said "Merry Christmas to him
with a box Of Cigars selected because
of the Lavender Ribbon around them
He was Up Against 1t!
| 1t seemed like Somebody was try
ing to Rub 1t In!
| You can't do anything with a Cigar
outside of smoking it. but Chew it or
put it in Blankets to Keep Out the
Moths. o. II. simply couldn't chew
and his Blankets belonged to the
Landlady.
Well. just then he had an Idea
Fine! He'd show 'em! Why, he
hadn't even Begun to Fight! He was
Game. and he meant to Take Every
thing Coming his Way.
He sat down and Figured Out the
! exact number of days before New
Years. Then he Divided his Cigars
into sections, sending some into the
First Line Trenches. others into the
Second Line. holding still others az
a Reserve; and the Remainder he de-
| creed should be Shot as Spies ON New
Year Eve.
Then he began the Slaughter.
Tho hrst day no Done his Duty as
he Seen It." And the Allotted Number
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-12-30
On New Years Eve

vt was New Years Eve-at Five
Oaks, the Townbred's country
place. All day it had been snow
q ing, adding a fresh coat to that
which had lain, soiled and frozen
hard, for nearly a week. Drifts were
piled high against corners Of build
ings and along the roadside, and the
merry jingle Of sleigh bells could be
heard from far and near.
AS Mr.. Townbred, home from his
daily toll in the city. left the trolley
at the little Five Oaks station and
started along the path to his house,
hc was thinking of many things
In town, tonight, the cafes would be
gay and friendly; music, dancing. the
'Xhilarating popping of corks and the
jolly company of friends at nearby
tablcs-a New Years Eve in the city.
Mr.. Townbred ploughed On through
abe snow, almost knee deep. 1t was
cold. and the stars were just begin
ming to appear. frosty and clear. A
Turn in the path and he saw before
him-his home.
we'll back from the road, under the
Eaunt, showed ecked limbs of huge oak
and chestnut trees it nestled with
thin spiral of smoke floating up from
the kitchen chimney. The lamps were
| lt, and the soft light streamed out
| through the windows and was re-
! Elected on the drifts of snow.
Alone. 1t seemed, in a world of snow
and trees and open fields. And yet
! there was something cheerful about
At, something Inviting, snug and warm
And he found it so within. Dinner
was ready hot, appetizing. satisfying
Mrs. Townbred welcomed him joyous
ly and Mutt, their little Cuban poodle,
danced about in high glee. The faith
full wood burner in one corner of the
! dining room was blazing away, and
The lamp on the table shed its mel
low glow over white napery and pol
ished silver.
"Theros going to be a big time in
town tonight" said Mr.. Townbred. as
he carved the roast.
Il suppose so-in the cafes, you
mean" replied Mrs. Townbred.
Eyes. Seems as though everybody
we know is booked for a New Year
party. Jones and wilkins and Brown
and at least II dozen more fellows
know asked me to bring you in
and join them in their celebration
Mrs. Tompkins even called up and in
Vited us to remain all night with
them after the New Year had been
properly welcomed in the cafe where
thcv always reserve n table. / told
lor IT was too long trip n-and she
sad that II served us right and thai
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-12-30

meetings, Sunday school, marriages
and funerals for 10, these many long,
weary years.
Then-it came! At one minute past
midnight. he rose to his feet.
THE New Year has come. friends. I"
he said. quite simply. And I wish
you all a happy New Year.
And such a babble OF sound as
broke forth! Everyone greeted every
one else. Happy New Year!" was
flung from one end Of the room to the
other. Tho small boys blew their
horns and spun their rattles. and up
in the belfry the sexton was pealina
forth the glad tidings.
Followed an hour in the Sunday
school room, where the Townbreds
met many more of the people living
round about them. Then the cold
sleepy horses were unhitched from
the long, rail hitching- post and. one
by one, the New Year merrymakers
left for their homes.
Riding back over the hard-froser
road, with Old Bob straining at his
bit to get to his warm stable, Mr.
Townbred spoke.
I'm glad / went. Frieda." no said
1T did me good. But what diff
ference from other New Year Ewes
I've spent! Gee, l can just see Jones
and Brown and the Tompkinses and
all the rest OF them about now-and
they think they're having the time OF
their lives! But the next morning
ugh"
Yes" replied Mrs. Townbred slow
ly. Eyes, this is better-far better
DO you know, Ruthvin, there's some
thing SO wholesome and clean about
living out in the open country that
well. 1t seems to bring ono near to
his Maker"
"It does" agreed Mr.. Townbred
soberly. Come on, giddap. Bob!"
Copyright, 1915. by Edward Riddle
Padgett.)
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-12-30

sisted largely in loading the tables in
the dining room until they groaned
with good things to eat of all sorts
and in hanging the mistletoe invitingly
upon the chandelier.
Then they dressed themselves in
their very best, and grouped them
selves in the drawing room as grace
fully as possible to await the front
door bells ringing. And about twelve
o'clock the callers began to arrive
Gentlemen of all sorts and conditions
clad irreproacha bly, in what were then
known as Prince Albert coats, in gray
spats, in silk hats, with canes, with
boutonneres, with a swagger.
After this the excitement was In
tense. And 1t was, Miss Agatha, how
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-12-30
sOEASON OHINGS.

Meanwhile have you seen anything
like the amount of fur which the win
ter girl succeeds in piling upon her
small person?
If you do not skate you are miles
behind the times. Better conclusions
Of the brain than to be out Of the
vogue.
Now you will begin to hear the
old, old story of the pin cushion
which, given to a second cousin two
Christmases ago, found its way back
to its original owner this year by
way of a great-aunt.
Is Santa Claus villain or hero
to you today?
Goodbye old year. You weren't
such a bad 'un, after ALL as years go.
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-12-30
Wanted! Men To Dance

rave as it Will, not 1t nor all of the
kings horses nor all of the kings men
shall drag me from my freside on
other nights than those two. Fellows
have to work sometimes"
1t seems, therefore. as IL the demand
for dancing men is likely to continue
gathering in force until it reaches a
shrek, without greatly affecting tho
decision of those worthless. They ara
the masters of their fates and they
swear that they cannot work all day
and dance all night. The outcome
therefore, is uncertain, for the fata
i of the irresistible force which meets
an immovable body Is still in doubt
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-12-30
T6e NEW YEARS RECEPTION

charming you do look in pink; my
favorite color, pink" And it was
This is quite the prettiest group of
ladies we have seen, and we have al
ready been to twenty places"
Friendly remarks made in the
kindliest spirit, you see.
And then to the dining room where
libations were drunk to each divinity
present and n bit of sandwich nib
bled-and on again 10 pay respects
to other fair ones
At the next place, no doubt, it was
"And oh Miss Mary, how charming
you look in blue; my favorite color,
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-12-30

and yet a happy one. 1 really think.
Ruthvin. it will do-well it can't hurt
us. anyway, to go. 1t begins at eleven
thirty and lasts until one minute after
midnight. Then, / understand. coffee
and sandwiches are to be served in
the Sunday School room and, really,
tit seems like beginning the New
Year right, doesn't it?"
A merry little twinkle came into
Mr.. Townbred's eyes. "I'd like to see
Jones and Wilkinson and Mrs Tomp-
kins when they hear about it. All
right. Frieda, We'll so. 1 think III
have another corn fritter-Virgie
sure knows how to make them-even
out of canned corn-doesn't she."
A little after eleven that night, Old
. Bob, their faithful white horse, was
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-12-30
60 T I]69nbrse3d{$$ s. & SPsssgdD

friends who already were calling out
Happy New Year," to each other,
Sleighs, in fact, seemed to be coming
from all directions. Just over the
brow of a hill the little village church
beamed a CHEEKY welcome to the tray
elers.
The service was an old-time one.
with song and prayer. The old min
lister, grown gray in his long years of
sacrifice and struggle, besought Provi-
dence In homely speech for a New
Year Of promise and blcssng-the
crops, the welfare of tho community.
good health and clean living, happi-
ness and more love toward God and
man, q cessation of the war in Europe
and the blessings of peace and Chris
tianity. The little organ in the corner
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-12-30
in angc, the village

wheezed out the old, old hymns and
the congregation, with moist eyes. fol-
lowed its lead.
Then came tho last few minutes
before the death of the old year and
the birth OF the new. With everyone
kneeling, in silent prayer, the minutes
licked by, the old patriarch in the
pulpit watching them. minute by min
ute, on the face of his plump, worn,
key-winder watch that had timed his
sermons, his appointments for prayer
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-12-30

harnessed to the sleigh and the Town
breds, bundled in furs and with bells
a-jingle, set out for the village
church, few miles distant.
The night was wonderful. Clear
and cold and crisp, with wintry
moon sailing majestically in the star
studded heavens and throwing an
eerie light over field and woodland
and open road.
Presently they met up with other
sleighs. similarly bound and filled with
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-12-30

country"
Mrs. Townbred smiled, little visit
fully. Are you sure you don't mind,
Ruthvin?" she asked.
VI course not-say, Erieda, for
goodness sake send this knife up to
the village to be sharpened! This
meat isn't tough but-no indeed,
really don't mind. We can have our
own quiet little New Year celebration
right here, my dear and"
There's a Watch night Service in
the village church." said Mrs. Town
bred. And, If you're willing, Ruth
vim, 1 believe I'd like TO go.
"A Watch-night Service? What
Is that?"
"a prayer and song service to
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-12-30

blue" but these faithless utterances
were never revealed because no one
remembered the next day what any
one else had said, which may have
been because of the confusion or
which may have been because of the
libations. as you are charitable or sus-
picious
At all events the cards of the visit
ors were jealousy saved by the hostess
and counted later, and thereafter
there was rivalry between neighbors
as to the number of gentlemen which
each had received" 1t was no I'M
usual thing for $50 men to call at a
single house, to drink up a small sized
ocean of eggnog and apple toddy. to
devour five bursting turkey gobblers,
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-12-30

A new way to clean silver without
strenuous rubbing is furnished by d
clever housewife. Let the silver soak
all the morning in a pan OF sour milk.
Wash in warm water to which half a
teaspoonful of ammonia has been adj
ded, and rub lightly with a clean
cham dis skin. You will find the sill
yer beautifully bright.
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-12-30

watch the old year out and the New
Year in, my dear
Mr.. Townbred smiled rather shame
facedly. "Goodness." he exclaimed
with mock surprise. 'Do they still
have them? / remember going as n
boy, but-but I'm afraid since then
my observances of New Years Eve
have been quite different. in recent
years Mt least"
Everyone is going" continued Mrs.
Townbred. at Is a solemn occasion,
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-12-30
"SWearin' Off"

- IIERE was once certain
Young Man who decided to Do
as Everybody Else does on New
- Year's-but Not to do as They
do six days later. To Withheld reso-
Lutte a few Resolutions and Make 'em
Stick.
Whether he did or not Is Another
Yarn, for the Six Days haven't Slip
ped BY as yet. The chances are, since
he's Human, he'll be a nifty little
Backslider. If he isn't it's a Miracle.
However, this sad. sad Chronicle
hath to do with his Swearin' OF Proc
ess-proving thereby. also. that Our
Hero Is very Human Hombre. All
set? Very well. Tambo, shoot!
Bang
Y'see. this chap could have decided
to Give the CODY to such things as
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-12-30
7155f%9v9S40US2EEKEIEPER
{ G,3 \ SANS S, q

quarters OF an hour before the beef
is done the pudding should be mixed
and poured into the pan under the
meat. The recipe for the pudding is
as follows: One pint of milk, four
eggs well-beaten. two cups OF -four.
one teaspoonful of salt. When meat
and pudding are done cut the latter
into squares and serve on the platter
around the beef.
THAT cabbage cooked a la francois
will make a nice change in tho diet
Boil the cabbage fifteen minutes, shred
coarsely. and put in a deep baking
dish. Pour over this a cream sauce,
or a sauce made of two tablespoonfuls
of melted butter, a scant teaspoonful
Of salt, dash Of pepper. and four
tablespoonfuls of cream. Sprinkle
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-12-30
And Then the Spinster Lady Did Not
Care That She Had No Bride-
groom.

%9 e spinster lady had reached the
n age of fifty years that morn
"A ing, and it was a sorrowful
WV morning TO her.
IF / had only realized how young
] was at forty-nine l should certainly
rave been moro frisky than 1 was last
year, said she to herself, grimly.
And just at that psychological mo-
mcnt, when she would have mourned
IL Left TO herself, the bell of the tele-
phone rang and she had TO postpone
her tears to answer.
Emily" said the voice at the other
end of the telephone, this is Augusta.
] called YOU up to say that just be-
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-12-30

Do your resolutinS early; it is to
be hoped it will not be necessary to
do it often.
Gift horses having been looked in
The mouth and in many cases found
wanting, tho procession to the ex-
change desks in the shops will start
carly tomorrow morning.
Tho next treat to look forward to
Is the exhibition of spring styles, and
even while the snow flies filmy ma
terials will be shown in shop windows
10 evoke the spirit of the coming
summer girl.
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-12-30

- HAT she cannot understand why
the Yorkshire pudding. served
so generally in England with
~ roast beef. is so seldom seen in
this country since it is both easy to
make and exceedingly delicious, and
she advises housekeepers to try 1t
with their next roast. The beef while
roasting must be placed upon sticks
laid crosswise of the pan so that the
Juice will drop into the pan. Three
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-12-30
And How IL Is Now Numbered Anon
The Ecasts Which Arc Not.

"LAS that New Years day Is
now merely post-climax, n
sort of embarrassing append
y age of Christmas. limo was
when it was as important feast as
the year boosted. Time was when
New Years Day offered attractions
looked forward to for weeks by young
persons of both sexes.
The ladies of the family were astr
early on New Years Day. then, getting
the house ready for the horde of visit
ors expected. Their preparation con-
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-12-30

r ELCONIE 1916! May you be
the happiest and most pros
porous year any Of us have
ever known.
The Columbia herald. [volume] (Columbia, Tenn.) 18??-1935, 1915-07-02
RISE In VALUE
OF REAL ESTATE
TOWN LOT SHOWS REMARKABLE
INCREASE IN VALUE IN A
SHORT TIME.

W. S. Beasley has sold to the Co
lumbia Ice and Cold Storage Compa.
ny his lot on South Main street for
the consideration of $4,000. This sale
probably sets a new record in Colum.
bia real estate on account Of the rise
in value Of the property. Two or
three years ago Mr.. Beahley purchas-
ed the lot from Mrs. Galloway for 81
800, and the comparison of the two
values Of the same piece Of property
will give an adequate idea of the rise
in value of real estate. The value Oh
the property has risen more than one
hundred per cent in the sort space
Of two years, which is a thing almost
unheard of during the present war
crisis.
The rise in the value of this town
lot is even greater than that of the
celebrated farms of the county which
have attained values within the last
few years that have been nothing
short of phenomenal.
The Columbia herald. [volume] (Columbia, Tenn.) 18??-1935, 1915-07-02
j. \. THOMAS ( CO.
WILL HAVE GREAT
OPENING ON AUG. |
NEW BUILDING FOR MILL MEN
WILL BE FINISHED BY MID.
DIE OF JULY.
ENORMOUS AMOUNT FLOOR SPACE
Three Departments Of the Building
Will Contain an Aggregate of Near.
ly 10000 Square Feet--AIl Sorts Of
Modern Machinery Installed.

The complete and commodious new
mill and wood working shop of ]. H.
Thomas & Company, one block from
court square, on East Seventh street,
VIII be completed by July Is and be.
fore August the firm will move into
it They are planning for big re-
ception and opening on the first Mon
day in August. Invitations will be
sent to their friends and customers
all over the county for that day.
This mill, when finished, will moi
only be complete in equipment bu
its floor space will compare favorably
with the mills to be found anywhere
IN the state, Its location is admira
Bile being only a block distant from
the business center of the city. Tn,
total floor space of the building will
1920 square feet.
In the basement which will be sixt,
feet by 1870 feet will be located tn
engine room and the lime and agatit
plaster departments. On the frs
floor there will be two departments
that for the mill proper being sixt
feet by 100 feet in dimestions Tn
carpenters department will also b
on the first floor, and will occupy
space of thirty feet by eighty fee
Everything in the way of modern ms
chinery for wood working and carper
tering will be located in the buildin
and the firm will be prepared to tax
contracts from the construction of tn
smallest to the largest houses.
The Columbia herald. [volume] (Columbia, Tenn.) 18??-1935, 1915-07-02
TWENTY BUSHELS
WHEAT TO ACRE
THAT is THE YIELD MADE BY
WILLIAM p. RIDLEY ON
43o ACRES.

Twenty bushels of wheat to the
acre on 4SO acres is not bad wheat
crop even in this year of unfavorable
seasons. That is just exactly what
William P. Ridley, of Clifton Place,
one of the biggest farmers in Maury
county made. He has weighed his
wheat and on the 430 acres lacked
but a few pounds Of making an aver
age of twenty bushels. That ID q
good yield in any year and with
wheat worth a dollar bushel is con
sidered a profitable crop. While this
is much better than the average crop
the best yield for the acreage SO IA
reported, it shows that the wheat crol
is far from a failure.