The Washington herald., 1915-08-08

! In response to a card setting forth thai
he had invented a machine calculated &c
tighten the burdens of the average house
hold. and believed that its merits ought
to be written for the benefit of the pub
lie at large. l went over to Newark the
other day to interview Mr.. McFarlane
1t did not take me long to discover tina,
he had made happy hit. HIS invention
try. is called The Domestic Improvel
and Household Cares Alleviator.' anc
each and every machine is to be rented
out on the plan of the telephone. Print
company every machine, and it seems
impossible for any fatal mistakes to hap
| pen.
The motive power of the machine is
intended to be placed in the basement OF
the house. Where there is no basement
it can be placed on the first floor back OF
the stairs 1t makes no more noise than
that produced by small bad boy rubbing
the teeth of course comb over a nickel
plated Baltimore heater. and the sooth-
/ ing effects IN the nerves is almost the
same.
, Twelve full revolutions of crank
winds UP a spring in box in the attic
| for a twen.y-four hours run. The crank
can be turned either way. and when not
! in use CAN be taken off the shaft and
USED for almost any purpose in the
cult. The pnlv lubricator needed is TO
touch tn, parts occasionally with a New
Hampshire candle. six of which will ac-
company everv machine. 1t is impossible
tor any one to get wound up in the shaft
ing, and the motive power can be painted
and decorated to resemble a wooden box
or most anything else. And as to the
spanking machine. YOU have only to place
the child in position. slide the belt over
the right-hand pulley. and away she
goes at the rate of 200 revolutions per
at work ever in Newark for the last ten
days. and in not one single case has it
failed 10 give perfect satisfaction. Two
minutes is considered the right length of
time. but won't do anv harm to make it
two and half
Ten. children can be put through this
machine more rapidly and with less
trouble than one s-year-old boy can be
is no biting-no kicking-no broken
limbs. Mr.. McFarlane assured me that
the machine also filed another long felt
want-waking up the cook at a certain
worked by the spring in the attic is at
tached to her bedstead. and at a given
hour the bed arises up on its hind legs.
so to speak. and if she isn't out she
is bound to come out Nationality doesn';
count for shucks and it can be applied
70 any bedstead. II will save the aver
age farmer from Is to 25 minutes each
morning in waking up the hired man. No
smoke-no dust-no moths. does its work
ike little major. and then yearns for
another victim.
d y
can he arranged to furnish a great sur
prise for the cats. A box inside the
house at some convenient point is filled
with old boots and shoes. and as soon
as the serenade on the hack fence be-
gins there is rain of missiles calcu-
lated to seriously dampen feline enthu-
siasm. This shower can be started and
stopped by the man of the house BY
simply pulling string. II was tried
only three nights in Newark. and vet
every cat seems to have headed for
Elizabeth to live out the rest of their
days.
1t was Mr.. McFarlane's idea to make
this machine take the place of the b.
gardus Kicker. and he. has entirely sue
ceeded. It has been set at gate and
tried on a tramp. and the tramp didn't
get over looking solemn until he reached
Salamanca. 1t was also arranged to
surprise a Young man just is he pulled
the bell OF a house where there was d
marriag ea BILE girl. and he went off with
haste and a wild look in his eyes. I am
further assured that this machine will
pound the family steak. turn the grind
stone. fill up the furnace. close the hem
coop door. keep rats out of the corn
crib sharpen the butcher knife and work
typewriter. 1t is not loom. but SIM
ply machine long wanted and intended
to recommend itself at first glance. There
is no meter attached to 1t to register
81 worth of gas the month YOU are away
to the mountains and the babies can
climb all over il without fear of an eX-