The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1915-07-26
Something to Suppress.

That Society for the Suppression Of Unneees-
sary Noises, organized in New York less than a
decade ago. was perhaps only short span OF
years ahead Of the times. 1t died of gentle ridi-
Guile then, because there not sufficient
variety of noises, loud noises, to justify crusade
Today there is need of a determined movement
of the sort, not only in New York, but in other
large and busy Cities including Washington The
time seems to be coming when for a certain period
in every twenty-four hours the silencer must be
put activities, to permit WORKOUT brains
to recuperate in sleep. The roar and clang of the
owl car and the blood-curdling shrek from the
automobile filled with the remnants of the last
homeward bound party of joyriders now merge in
to the rattle OF the milk bottles and the deaening
crash of the garbage wagon lid, that has been
heralded by penetrating and uncarthly groans
tortured from tin horn by rubber-lunged spe-
wicked the just.
There are necessary noises that have followed
legtmately in the wake OF progress. The down
town day must, of course be filled with the clat-
ter of the typewriters the rumble and ring of the
pondcrous street running half-minute
schedule, the of the back-hre and exploding
tire and the musketry practice of the 6o-horse
power maneuvering for escape from the municipal
hop-scotch links-though never could under
stand how one chauffeur manages to faithfully
reproduce the effect of a thousand riveting ma
chimes at work out of step steel skyscraper,
him; while another slips noiselessly
away blessing only because we neither
nor hear him. Further uptown life would be
a little less nervc-wrecking, but for the appear
in the cast of the hand-organ man, the sing
ing and talking and laughing machine, the con-
trvancc that keeps the piano going when daughter
is exhausted, and sister reaching for the upper
case {. And there, too, the hell-harmony of the
automobile transhxers, those contrivances for
warning weary walkers of impending disembowe-
ment, is heard to terrifying advantages Long
vistas OF street. with few obscuring vehicles, per-
init the speeding chauffeur to sight prospective
victim from distance and then with weird Shrek
or moan, or dying scream, from some wretched
wight fleeing an instant too late-released from the
devils vitalS by some secret pressure-hc seeks
TO freeze the blood and limbs of the man he has
marked, the scientist is said to stroke the back
of the frog TO prepare him for an ecstatic vivi-
section. OF course the pedestrian usually hops in
the nick OF time and when his heart resumes action
and he looks for the number of the hearse he
in the distance the alphabet tangong with the
multiplication table spelled backwards
There arc some noises that we cannot do with
out and there some that ought to be canned"
or the nerve specialists will get ALL unless they
succumb first themselves We suggest to the Dis
trict Commissioners that since suppression is the
order OF the day, Commission for the Discovery
Segregation and Ultimate Suppression of Discor-
dant and Unnecessary Sounds and Noises, Noe
turnal and Diurnal with modest but adequate
cmolumcnts, would add becoming luster to their
administration