davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1915-07-30
DElUSlONS.

I believe one who hath not loved,
Hath half the sweetness Of his life un,
proved;
Like one who with the grape within his
grasp,
Drops 1t, with all its crimson Juice un.
pressed,
And all it's luscious sweetness left un.
guessed,
Out from his careless and unheedins
clasp.
More than half Of the sorrows OF
the world are caused by slips of girls
wedding boyish young fellows, who mis-.
took in their own hearts youthful
fancy for love, the great passion which
makes or mars life.
Such young husbands often carr
good salaries, but spend their money
for show and pride's display, leaving
scarcely anything for support. When
only welded a short time, the result
is the poor young bride undergoes the
necessity of breaking up their tiny
home, around which SO many fond
hopes were built, when their honey
moon was blissful, and returning
humbly to the parental roof.
From that time and ever afterward
there never seem to be a doubt in her
mind that matrimonial life is part and
parcel of delusion. She never stops
to make an account Of the great mum.
Der Of happy, welded unions, her
parents, friends and any number of
happy girl friends too numerous to
count. included. Why are all of these
dear ones so happy while her
lot turned out so miserably? She
asks her onetime chum. who
married before she did. and Ia
as prosperous and happy as one
could wish to be. There is a rea-
son for it, my DEAR" was the earnest
reply. you are as much to blame
for the disruption of all you once held
sacred as he is. You encouraged your
young husband to take you to theaters,
balls and little social affairs to your
hearts content when you were mar.
ried a fortnight. You dressed expen.
sively and, of course, he was obliged
to engage a cab or conveyance, buy
white slippers, fluffy frocks and hats"
If he is a young man of wealth, OF
course, he may not mind these seem.
ingly trifling expenses when he is new.
ly wed. But il he has to make his
way in the world, count his dollars
economically to make his ends meet.
he is frightened over the melting away
of his finances and in despair over
the stumbling block In his path. What
wonder is it that q man Of moderate
near In such straits is forced to give
up all that he once held dear in his
mighty love and go forth to commence
all over again, while she returns, sad.
der and wiser, to the old folks at
home, discontinued and disillusioned?
Young women cannot corral all rich
husbands and loving hearts too. Young
women fix the standard of their ambi-
ton to worth Of character, principle,
instead of wealth, which vanishes, and
spending money to enhance their van
ity. There are many single men who
want wives to help them bald up
their future joys. Matrimonial delu-
sions with them are when they meet
the would-be butterfly sort of girls.
Laughter and high. gay spirits of
youthful women appeal to them. De-
lusions do not enter happy, loving
nelpmeets' hearts. free from Mammon
and vanities.
Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1915-07-30
Twenty Cents OUT.

II made an awful break yesterday"
said the fellow who Is known as a
tightwad.
THAT is unusual for you. How did
1t happen" asked the man in whom
he was about to confide.
II met Lulu in front OF an Ice cream
parlor, and | told her that her lips
were like strawberries. She said the
only way to prove 1t was by making
the comparison, SO l had to blow her
to a strawberry sundae."
Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1915-07-30
Made since 1846-Hanford's Balsam.
4
lnsuIted the Mayor.

A company had opened a new swim.
ming bath in the place, and as q com
pliment sent a free ticket to the
mayor,
That worthy man was very pleased
But he began to wonder when anoth.
er ticket arrived.
Sitting down, he wrote to the bath
proprietors as follows:
Gentlemen: Your first ticket | re.
ceived as a compliment. Your second
strikes m as being rather suggestive.
II you send me a third l will take 1t as
a personal insult"
Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1915-07-30

ing description Of IT. was disappoint-
ed. Wiley had been lured by the
promise Of a large, roomy place. food
ed with golden sunshine by day and
swept by cooling breezes by night and
spacious ground for the children to
play in. There were no signs to keep
off the grass. The table was to be laden
with fresh vegetables and fruits, which
the boarders could actually watch
growing, and as for pure milk and
fresh eggs, they should accompany
the other good things as a matter of
course.
Hubby was content to suffer in the
heat of the city, sleep on a lounge on
the screened back porch hearing that
the family was comfortably situated
and enjoying the benefits of the oun
try to the full. It's an unlucky men
to the wife If her little daughter offers
to relieve her for nce from writing
the daily letter home to papa. Chill
dren are too honest to be deceptive. A
single glance through its pages
showed the situation of affairs. I'VE
are not having a bit of good time," the
letter read. "The four of us have a
big room divided off by curtains. The
sun shines into our eyes through the
thin curtains early in the morning and
we can't sleep any r It's dread
fu1lv hot hocorco uo boxya IN Laap Tho
windows tight shut, II we opened
them the skeeters would come in and
blister us. There isn't a spear of
grass here, all clay, SO we cannot run
about the grounds. We were to have
eggs for breakfast for the first time,
but over night they turned into the
cutest, dearest little yellow chicks.
There's a doctor here who says milk
would put us all on our feet again,
but no n will sell ma any. Ma al
ways wanted to get nice and thin;
you wouldn't know her, she's got so
skinny. Bobby and l used to love
hominy, but we don't like 1t any more;
it's hominy and sorghum for break
fast, sorghum and hominy for lunch,
and fried hominy crumpets with
prunes for dinner, or else turnips and
boiled cabbage.
I'VE haven't had a change Of dresses,
for mother won't unpack the trunks.
There's a little boy here with a dread
fully red face. Bobby was playing
with him a long time before ma saw
them. She was awfully scared, be-
lieving the boy was coming down with
the measles, but he was only In pain
from eating little green apples off the
trees in the orchard. He did want
fruit SO much.
How l wish we we're back in our
nice, cool home where we could have
our own rooms, and soft, white little
beds, and all we wanted Of good things
to eat. You can't come any too soon
to suit Bobby and me-to take US
away from here"
The husband and father arrived on
the very next train. 1t Is rarely that
the family that has suffered SO many
hardships insists upon finding another
boarding place, all are usually well
pleased to cut the vacation short, and
get back to the comforts and joys of
home, sweet home.
Moral: Don't take the alluring ads
about summer board for truth. In
spect the places where you are to take
= The children, If 1t be possible. All Is
aot gold that glitteTs.
Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1915-07-30
Best for Horses.

Give your horses good care and you
will be doubly repaid by the better
work they will do. For sores, gals
and other external troubles apply
Hanford's Balsam Of Myrrh. Ranch.
men, lumbermen and liverymen recon-.
mend It. ADV.
Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1915-07-30
Her Own Business.

A woman mounted the steps Of the
elevated station carrying an umbrella
like a reversed saber. An attendant
touched her lightly, saying:
Excuse me, madam, but you are
likely to put out the eye of the man
behind you"
Hes my husband" she snapped.
calmly.
Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1915-07-30
Keeping Up Appearances.

What's the use of buying a fly swat
teri" growled Mr.. Cobbles. "A folded
newspaper does well enough"
do you think I'm going to swat flies
with a folded newspaper when there
are visitors here, Henry Cobbles?"
asked Mrs. Cobbles. Il should say
mott"
Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1915-07-30
Time Required,

"How long does it take you to 60
fishing?"
well If you consider the time l
actually fish, 1t takes only a few hours.
But II you count In the time l con-
sumo waiting for conditions to be Just
right and arranging for bait, 1t takes
several weeks"
Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1915-07-30
CARE FOR CHlLDREN'S
Hair and Skin With C%utlcura. Moth.
Ing Easier. Trial Free.

The Soap to cleanse and purify the
skin and scalp, the Ointment to
soothe and heal rashes, feelings, red.
ness, r%oughness. dandruff, etc. Moth.
Ing better than these fragrant super.
creamy emollients for preserving and
purifying the skin, scalp and hair.
Sample each free by mail with Book.
Address postcard, Cuticura, Dept. Ky,
Boston. Sold everywhere.-Adv.
Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1915-07-30
OuP
IhUUGhI ShE
COULD NOT LIVE
Restored to Health by Lydia
E. Pinkham's Vegetable
Compound.
Unionville, MOI suffered from =
trouble and | got 30 weak that =

could hardly Walk
across the foorwith-
out holding on to
something. l hal
v spells ana
my fingers woule
cramp and my face
would draw, and J
could not speak. nOT
sleep to do any gUo&
had no appetite. an!
everyone thought I
uould mt liwA
Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1915-07-30
Deserves II.

Heavens! The mob will tear that
man to pieces! Can't something be
done to stop them?"
LET 'em alone. The man they're
trying to lynch is the chap who In.
vented the installment plan of selling
books"
Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1915-07-30
No Time,

isn't it strange that Mrs. Robin
son never attends the Mothers club
meetings. We've invited her time and
again"
I'm afraid she's a hopeless old fogy.
She insists or staying at home to take
care of her children"
Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1915-07-30

rs the futurist music you're play
ing" inquired hubby as his wife
pumped the pianola.
mo. dear; it's Home. Sweet Home
but | think Bobby has been using it
as a target for his air rife"
Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1915-07-30
Sure Thlnn.

Hostess-Sh! that's my neighbors
dog. Be careful what you say about
that woman.
Fair Guest-Why that's silly. Dogs
can't understand.
Hostess-No, but they carry tails
Philadelphia Record.
Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1915-07-30

She (rapturously)-Ah, how nice 1t
must be to wake up and find yourself
famous! How | wish | had a name.
He Nimidly)-Well, er-that's easy.
How would mine suit you?
Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1915-07-30
Same Old SYMPTOMS.

same OIo symptoms.
Hyker-What do you consider the
one unfailing sign of spring?
Pyker-The delicious feeling which
makes you want to sit down and watch
other people work.
Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1915-07-30

Safety First.
How did the accident happen"
HE got run over when he stopped
to read q Safety First sign"
Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1915-07-30
LamA@6zAbqys
7T7lAg5N7
t[APIg0p|N
WIVES ON SUMNER OUTINGS.
xMKM neSMr n1E1asER nnauu

OF all the friendships we contract in life
Oh, give me first. the friendship Of q
wife,
%dieus. nay parting pains. to u are
sweet
They make 80 glad the moments when
We meet.
II it we're not for the thought Of
closed homes, most husbands would
Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1915-07-30
The Reason,

i say, why did you name that dos
Of yours Gossip"
Because he's such a backbiter."
Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1915-07-30

For poison ivy use Hanford's Bal
sam. ADV.
Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1915-07-30

There are "a clubs exclusively for
ladies In London.
Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1915-07-30

One trial convinces-Hanford's Bal.
sam. Adv.
Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1915-07-30

For gals use Hanford's Balsam.
ADV.
Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1915-07-30

For any sore-Hanford's Balsam.
ADV.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1915-09-09
GOT A LITTLE SATISFACTION
Motorist Employed Rather Neat Way
of Getting Even" After His Ar
rest for Speeding.

A motorist was stopped by a police
mar for speeding, %whereupon he be-
came angry and called the policeman
an ass. After he had paid his fine,
the judge %reproved him for what he
had said to the officer.
Then ! mustn't call a policeman an
ASST" he said.
Certainly not" said the judge.
"You must not insult the police"
But you wouldn't mind if l called
an ass a policeman, would you?"
why. no. If it gives you any sat
isfaction," answered his honor with
a smile.
The motorist turned to the man
who had arrested him, Good day, po-
piceman," he said, and Immediately
left the courtroom.-Boston Tran
script.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1915-09-09
Constipation
Vanishes Forever
Why the Applause.

The amateur theatrical performance
was being discussed.
"You know that part Of the new
play where the man seizes the woman,
forces her into the cupboard, and
turns the key on herr"
"Yes."
well, last night a fellow in the
audience applauded it SO much that
they had to put him out"
II don't think there is anything to
applaud about it.
"Yes, there was. 1t turned out that
the fellow was the husband Of the
actress, and it was the first time he
had ever seen anybody shut her up"
was the cool reply.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1915-09-09
COURTESY OF OLD TIMES
Manners Were important When Wash.
ington Lived. but We Have No
Time to Be Polite.


Among the manuscripts preserved In
the state archives al Washington Is
an old copybook written when he
was but fourteen years old by the man
for whom the city was named Most
interesting Of all the memoranda set
down carefully IN the boyish handwrit-
ing are what George Washington
quantity called Rules Of Civility and
Decent Behavior in Company and Con-
yersation." And one OF these rules is:
BE not forward. but friendly and
courteous; the first to salute, hear and
answer. and be not pensive when 1t is
time to converse"
II as a boy he studied such a
inns. do you wonder that Washington
was all his life noted for his fine a
ners? The rules of courtesy were
thought to be a very important part
of a gentleman's education In the
eighteenth century. A man was con-
sidered ignorant and ill-bred If in his
intercourse with the world he omitted
certain little acts of p~oliteness. What
gentleman Of the old school ever per
mitted himself to remain seated when
ladies were standing or to smoke in
their presence without first asking per
mission?
When they we're invited out our an
cestors were brought up to believe that
due respect to the host and hostess
demanded that each guest make him.
self as agreeable as possible; hence
the quaint maxim copied out so care
fully by the young George Washing
ton: BE not pensive when it is time
to converse" The mar at the present
day too often, takes the attitude that
he is comforting a favor by accepting
an invitation; and expects to be
amused and entertained without con-
tributing anything.
Old-fashioned courtesy taught that
Difference must at all times be paid to
age. A hundred years ago little boys
and girls were told to mind their
manners If perhaps the dominic" or
| the schoolmaster or anyone of position
or authority spoke to them; and the
small lads would bow deeply and the
tiny maids would curtsy most re-
spectfully.
Such airs and graces, pretty though
they were, would be out of place in
our more strenuous times. Yet there
is no reason why our young peoples
manners should not be as good, If Of
necessity less formal, than those OF
our ancestors.
If children are taught to be deferen
tial to their elders, to be polite and
generous to their playfellows, and are
instructed in all the small courtesies
of the table and drawing room pre-
scribed by etiquette, they will have
been given a heritage by their par
ents that will be of inestimable value
in after life. For a thorough acquaint
ance with the fundamental rules o
good breeding gives an S Of man
ner that can be acquired in no othe.
way; and it helps wonderfully In thu
fight for success we all must wage
Rehoboth Sunday Herald.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1915-09-09
Painful Truth.

Miss Singwell had been a member
of the choral society eve since it
had been in existence, and 1t was UNI
doubtedly true that her first youth
had waned, but the choirmaster was
astounded recently by the news that
she had resigned her membership.
Resigned" he gasped. But what
ever for?"
well, I don't know exactly" said
the secretary, "but it strikes me that
it may have something to do with the
solo we picked for her at the next
performance"
why? What is it?"
Don't you remember? It begins, I
once was young, but now am old "
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1915-09-09
Girls as erocers, Clerks.

The London municipal school, where
girls may learn in six weeks to be-
come g~rocers' clerks, has been sue!
c~essfully launched in the western part
of the city, with a class of 80. The
girls will be trained in all routine
work of assistants in grocery and pro-
vision stores. Tuition is free, and pu-
pills unable to support themselves dur
ing the six-weeks' course are granted
SO a week from the prince of Wales
fund.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1915-09-09

Tnere Is scarcely a nelghbor around me
who does not use your medicine. Mrs.
J. F. JOHNSON, R. No. 4, Box 80, Prince
ton, Illinois.
Experience of q Nurse.
Poland, N. Yin my experience as q
III / certainly think Lydia E. Pink
hams Vegetable Compound is a great
medicine. / wish all women with fe-
male troubles would take it. / took it
when passing through the Change of
Life with great results and l always re-
commend the Compound to all my pa
tients if l know of their condition in
time. will gladly do all / can to help
others to know of this great medicine"
Mrs. HORACE NEWMAN, Poland, Her.
kimer Co., N. Y.
If you are i'll do not drag along until
an operation is necessary, but at once
take Lydia E. Pinkham's Vegetable
Compound.
IF you want Especial advice write
Lydia e. Pinkham Medicine Co..
(cOnfidentiaD Lynn, Mass.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1915-09-09
Barker Asks Suit Dismissal.

In accordance with an agreement
and stipulation entered into between
Assistant Attorney General Ewing and
the American Bakery Co. at Sedalia,
Attorney General Barker has filed in
the supreme court a motion to dismiss
the suit against the st. Louis company
for violation OF the antitrust laws of
the state.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1915-09-09
Cheering for Mr.. s%Iimpurss.

MT. Slimpurse Feeling his way
Your charming daughter tells me that
she is an excellent cook and house
keeper.
Old Lady (calmly)-Yes, I have had
her carefully taught, for l have al
ways held that no lady who does not
understand housekeeping can properly
direct a retinue of servants.-New
York Weekly.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1915-09-09
Board Of EQUALIZATION Meets.

Considerable apprehension is felt
that the board Of equalization will
allow certain st. Louis banks to evade
a portion Of their taxes. and City
Counselor Daues Of 81. Louis is at the
capital to prevent II.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1915-09-09
school Fund WIN Be Undivided.

School Fund VIII Be Undivided.
Attorney General Barker. in an
opinion transmitted 10 Auditor Cor
don holds that the public schools are
entitled to one-third OF all the rev.
enues for the year ending June 80.
1915, and instructed the auditor TO at
once make the apportionment on that
basis.
This opinion will make the total OF
the school funds for the year $2.123,-
554.71.
The new ruling completely reverses
the one made previously by the attor-
ney general. He believes the old opin-
ion was technically correct, but that
in view Of custom and the Importance
of the schools he believes the auditor
should apportion the money in favor
Of the schools.
In his original opinion, Attorney
General Barker held that the state
legislature, in specifying that one
third of the ordinary" state revenues
should go to the school fund, did not
include beer, oil and grain inspec-
ton" fees, which the attorney gen.
eral classed as "extraordinary" rev.
enue.
The one-third portion Of this So
called extraordinary" revenue which
was diverted from the school revenue
by opinion No. /, amounted to $514,-
SOP. Opinion No. 2 says that this
money should be turned over to the
school fund and directs the state audi
tor to certify this amount to the
superintendent of public schools for
distribution.
State superintendent of Schools
Howard A. Gass had instituted a man
damus suit in the state supreme court
to compel the auditor to pay over this
~so-called extraordinary" revenue to
the school fund. When asked what
he would do about his suit Mr.. Gass
remarked that he would wait a few
days; maybe there'll be another opin.
ion"
In opinion No. 2 Attorney General
Barker says that in order to relieve
the public schools of the embarrass.
ment caused by opinion No. 1, he will
rule that the money be turned ove1
to the school fund. He holds the
question still doubtful, however.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1915-09-09

and q all
caused by female
trouble, and ! took
Lydia E. Pinkham's
v Vegetable Com
pound with such ex-
eellent results that l
am now feeling fine.
/ recommend the
C~ompOundand praise
it to all. l shall be
glad to have you
nt1hlish NV letter
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1915-09-09
Future War Talk.

did you see where they are going
to send the wal babies rag dolls?"
Fine. When the wal babies get
old enough to know what it is all
about, they can chew EN-"
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1915-09-09
VINO captures child.

Mrs. Margie Mackie at the point of
a revolver forced her divorced hus-
band, r. b. Mackie, to surrender pos
session Of their ~12-yeartold daughter.
She was arrested a little later on
charges preferred by her husband.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1915-09-09
Rlver -lmnrovrment.

One result of the recent agitation
for improved waterways In Missouri
is becoming apparent. Dixie and o
vetment work costing ~sf.5OO,0O0 has
been commenced On the big Muddy"
Two thousand men win be employed.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1915-09-09

The Dear Girl-Well, did you sue
coed in making papa toe the mark?
The Young Man (sadly)-Yes, but l
was the mark.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1915-09-09
Extra Session Probable.

On his return to jefferson City
from his vacation Gov. Major pre-
pared a statement relative to the
school fund controversy in which he
says that it will be better for all in
terests of the state to have the clas-
sifcation of the revenues that come
into the treasury passed upon and
settled by the supreme court.
For that reason he believes that the
pending mandamus suit should be de-
cided.
The governor declares he will have
no hesitancy in calling a special ses-
sion of the legislature should the nee
essity arise for such action in order
to give the schools all the money they
IRE entitled to.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1915-09-09
Grain Inspeotors al Work.

The inspectors of the grain inspec.
ton bureau under the direction Of
State Warehouse Commissioner Brad
shaw, have begun work in conjunc-
ton with private samplers, receiving
Is cents per car for the service.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1915-09-09
tuberculosis delegates Named.

Gov. Major appointed the following
delegates to represent Missouri at the
Mississippi Valley Conference on
Tuberculosis at Indianapolis, Septem-
Der 20 and 30 and October /: DR.. st.
Elmo Sander. Kansas City; DR.. Sam
iel Lipsitz, DR.. John Young Brown
and A. w. Jones, Jr, st. Louis: DR..
Walter McNabb Miller, Columbia; DR..
Edwin James, Springfield; DIR. VIII
liam M. Bayliss, Clarence; DR.. ]. l.
Eaton, Bismarck; DIR. J. w. Dreyfuss,
Louisiana, and DR.. w. A. Clark. JEFF
ferson City.