The Leon reporter. (Leon, Iowa) 1887-1930, 1915-03-25
NATIONAL HUMoR,
Some Examples of 1t From ScotcS
and English Sources.

| SOHlc IyNdlnplcS III 0COJCJ
and English Sources.
Is there such thing as national
humor? To test it let us take a
typical anecdote from Scottish, En-
!; glish and Cockney sources. The Rev.
David Macrae in National Humor'
provided the world with handsome
and entertaining volume that will be-
come known to many by this simple
expedient.
In the days of Nelson, some one, at
a gathering of Scotsfen, said he won
dered at Nelson signaling England
expects every man to do his duty"
and saying nothing of Scotland,
which supplied some of the bravest
and best men to the British feet To
which another member of the COM
pany replied Willingly: "Why should
he speak O. Scotland expectin'?" En-
gland might only be able to expect
but Scotland kent-and kent fine
that every son O. hers would dae his
duty The was nae fear and nae doot
on that point
Speaking of the people who exer-
else themselves more in puzzling
over the origin of evil than trying to
get rid of it, a preacher said: These
people begin at the wrong end. What
would you think of man, who, if
he saw pig in his garden, should
begin to discuss the question how
that pig could have got in, when the
pig is busy all the time roofing up his
potatoes. No; the first thing is to
drive the pig out. Let us drive sin
from our hearts and from the world.
Let this be our business here. We
shall have whole eternity after
wards to ascertain how it got in at,
first"
When some railway bill was before
a committee of the house of COM
mons, Sergeant Merewether, who led
for the promoters, said: II don't
come before you Gas counsel often
| do with a superficial knowledge of
the country through which the pro-
posed line would pass, for have fish
ed in the rivers and shot on the
mountain sides of the valley of Ere
irion, and have read the Twelve :
Commandments in the Church of
fLlandrillo,"
"Twelve Commandments retort-
ed the lawyer on the other side.
perhaps you will kindly give us the
last two" "Well, the eleventh is,
Don't interrupt counsel when he is
addressing the committee and the
twelfth you shall have before you
want it, when this committee gives !
it's decision
A child was crying in the street
near Charing Cross, when a compass
sionate lady, passing at the time, !,
stopped and asked him what he was
crying for. Cause I've lost penny
mother gave me-
"Ah, we'll, never mind said the
lady Here's another for you,' and
gave Kim one.
She had not gone much further,
when she heard the little fellow bel
lowing more Justify even than before.
Coming back to him, she asked what !
he was crying for now.
Whether it was the little fellows |
game to make money by crying, or
whether the lady's kindness had sud-
denly suggested to him that he had
tapped a fountain that might be
r,oda something more of, he replied:
I'm crying eos if hadn't lost that
there first penny, I should ave 'ad
ituppence!"
A story is told of pompous manu-
facturer at school examination ask
ing a smart boy: "Wot's the capital
of 'Olland?" to which the boy repli-
ed: 1.-THE letter H. sir
An amusing story is told of gal
liant Highlander who, with his trusty
blade, had wrought havoc in the
enemy's ranks at the storming Of
Quebec. General Townsend, who had
witnessed his exploits, saw him, after
the victory, sit down beside a heap !
of Frenchmen whom he had slain,
wipe the dust and sweat from his
brow, and refresh himself with a
huge "sneeshin,'' or pinch from his
Highland snuff-mill. On the return
of his regiment to this country the
king who had heard of the incident
through Mr.. Pitt, expressed a desire
to see the brave old Highlander, and,
on being introduced, held out his
hand for Malcolm to kiss. Honest
Malcolmb, unacquainted with the cere
monal of courts. and thinking that
the king was holding out his hand for
pinch OF snuff. exclaimed, 'HereI
you are, God bless vo,r great males
ty!" and presented the box. Thei
king laughed heartily at the mistake,
took pinch, made Malcomb leu
tenant and gave him half pay for
life.
Profits j11s Per Cent.