davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1915-06-29
QUAKER REFLECTIONS.
IFrom the Philadelphia Record

[From the Philadelphia Record.]
Money may be the root of all evil,
but it doesn't always grow
Even when a baby is welcome it is
doubtful if twins would be doubly well
come.
Even on the road to Success some
people always want to exceed the
speed lint.
Good goods come in small packages:
A pint of happiness is worth a peck of
trouble.
There's plenty of room at the top,
unless you happen to be a seeple-
climber.
Look before you leap and you won't
be so apt to jump from the frying pan
into the fire.
No, Maude, dear; it doesn't neces-
sarily follow that the young man who
asks for your hand is fond of lady
fingers.
wigg-'"That fellow Bjones is a bad
egg" Wagg-'sYes, If it wasn't for
that I'd like to give him a good beat
ing"
success is sometimes purely ac-
cidental," remarked the Wise Guy.
Yes" agreed the Simple Mug, "all
the noodles are not in the soup
Blobbs-"I wonder why the society
reporters always speak of a bride as
being led to the altar" Slobbs-"I
give it up. Any bride / ever saw could
find her way there blindfolded.''
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1915-06-29
Jayh awker Jots

About the only excuse for chewing
tobacco, explains the Olathe Register,
is that some men who use 1t MI their
mouths so full that they cannot talk
The "meanest man" has been To-
Gated again by the Minneapolis Better
Way in a party who borrowed 81 from
a minister and the nsent away for four
full quarts and a corkscrew.
man will eat Dutch lunch on a
fishing trip, observes Bill Payton in
his Colony Free PreSS-ants, flies and
all-and then howl his head off if he
happens to find hair in the butter at
home.
You will never know what real en-
barrassment is until you find an
empty pocketbook hidden in your
wake, insists the Barber County Index
The owner is certain to ask, where's
the money!?
Childred get things mixed, says the
Atchison Weekly Globe. Louisa In
gals is smitten with a girl whose name
is Gladys. The name is new to Louisa,
and so she calls her new friend Let
tuce,'' with which '7ord she is familiar.
One of the business houses at Cav
ker has the following notice posted in
a conspicuous position on one of its
walls: eff you spit on, the floor at
home, spit on this floor all you want
to. We want our customers to feel at
home here"
Terse but graphic comment on the
Great War by the Leavenworth Labor
Chronicle: The bear that walks like
a man has learned to run like a deer
Times are good for Beau Brummel.
points out the Wetmore Spectator 1t
used to cost him two bucks to take his
lady to the play. Now he strolls out
with two bits in his pocket, buys a
rickePs worth of chewing gum and
takes in the movies.
Reported by the Manhattan Nation
alist: The black birds are not the
least interested spectators of the flood
on the Kaw. They nave flown above
the river in large numbers, all day.
They take a delight in flying to the
middle of the river, picking some piece
of drift wood, and riding it down the
stream. They display the utmost eau
ton in their sport, TO avoid striking
one of the numerous jams of drift
wood. Some of the most venturous
remain on a piece of drift as long as
they dare, before it strikes some OBJ
stacle, and then sail away up the river
for another ride. The birds do not
seem to find anything to eat on the
logs, but would appear to be riding for
the sport of it.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1915-06-29

After Reddy Squirrel made the ac-
quaintance of the little bind SPUR
rel, he went over to the little fellows
home every day and many fine chat
did they have From the blind squir-
rel Reddy learned many things about
the park which was now to be his
home; and about the woodsy creatures
which lived therein. And also (f the
truth must be told Reddy learned
many lessons of kindness and patience
from the good little fellow though
Reddy didn't realize it at the timei
One bright morning, after they had
chatted a few minutes, Reddy said
"Why do we stay around in this one
ought to explore more of the park.
Maybe we would find a part that we
would like more than this"
II doubt that" replied the olind
squirrel, land, you see. 1 cannot go
very far in safety. This part of the
park 1 know very well and 1 feel Sc
cure here. Maybe there would be
danger elsewhere. But don't mind
about me-" he added, as he saw how
disappointed Reddy looked; you go
Then you can come back and tell me
all about it-that will be lot of fun
DO you think SOP" asked Reddy
doubtfully. "Pd like it better if you
went with me. Seems to me nobody
can go anywhere with me this morn
ing. Mrs .Reddy was busy at the
nest; you think there is danger in ex-
ploring; L don't believe anybody loves
mel"
"Oh, dear. you mustn't think that.'
exclaimed the little blind squirrel in
distress please, please don't think
that, I'll go with you, Only, you see.
with only one eye exploring isn't as
much fun as you might Think But
the obliging little fellow started down
from the tree to go with Reddy.
oil of "a sudden Rpddv
how selfish he was in wanting the
blind squirrel to go with him. Of
course, exploring wasn't much fun
when one was half blind. Why hadn't
he realized that himself! Indeed
YOU will not go with me-" Reddy ex-
claimed excitedly. 81 wouldn't have
YOU go with me-you might get hurt"
"Oh, I guess not" answered the
blind squirrel, who, now that he was
started, really wanted to explore bit
for a change. Il guess you can take
care of me all right" Ano he came
on down the tree
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1915-06-29

now. Home conditions are
fairly satisfactory. General trade is
quiet, and does not improve as rapidly
as desired The most encouraging
symptom is the increasing activity in
the steel trade, resulting almost en-
tirely from war contracts. This in
fuses a somewhat feverish condition
in that industry, and speculation in
what is known as the war group of
securities has carried market prices
in many cases to unheard of figures.
Needless to say speculation in these
properties at present prices is exceed
ingly hazardous. The financial situa-
ton of the United States is exception
ally strong and satisfactory. Funds
are steadily accommodating, and there
is an abundance of money at very rea-
sonable rates to good borrowers. In
July. the semiannual dividend dis
bursements aggregating about $27O'-
100000 or over S4,00O,00O less than a
wear ago will take place. Cap
ita1 awaiting investment is plentiful in
this country, our people are economic
ing and we have reason for ample
in our own financial and
industrial future. In these respects,
we were never stronger"
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1915-06-29
KANSAS.

KANSAS.
When they fought the great rebellion
Way back there in siXty-one,
Didn't they have to call on Kansas
For John Brown to start the fun?
When the world in fear and trembling
Stood before the Demon Rum,
Who was it but Carrie Nation
Hacked the ears off that old bum?
Could the world produce PETER
OF the softly flowing fleece,
Or Sockless Jerry Simpson,
Or Mary Ellen Lease?
Nay! And when it called for foodstuff
Kansas, with her usual mirth,
j ust produced quarter billion
Wheat. to feed the hungry earth.
Likewise when that darksome. shadow
Fell upon the proud white race
And a mighty man was needed
To wipe out the foul disgrace
By mighty hand implanted
On the Ethiopian jaw
Where'd they go? Where could they go
But out to Wichita?
With her golden sunflowers nodding
In the fields across the way,
And the meadow-lark a-Singing
In the sunshine all the day,
And the fields of green alfalfa
And the seas of ripening grain,
You may call Sunny Kansas
j. W. c. in the Norton Champion.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1915-06-29
Globe Sights
BY THE ATCHIsoN GLOBE.

Modern civilization is a joke, but it
is sad joke.
Lots of near-sighted men can see
Figures" quite a distance.
A nuisance is the man who sees a
deep principle in every thing.
Capital, it should also be remem-
bered, mounts many a balky horse.
Did it ever occur to you that prob
ably your important story won't be
believed.
There are several systems of evading
work, of which a tramp chooses the
least desirable.
So many of the faminine fashions
seem to be based on that glad refrain,
Let a little sunshine in
You must also consider the fact that
the cigarette manufacturers are better
advertisers than the crusaders.
A whiStling office boy left today
on a two weeks vacation and the of
flee force feel that they are also hav-
ing one.
Most blind people are smiling most
of the time, and you people with good
eyes should cheer up and quit grum-
bling.
Clothes make the man in fewer in
stances lately than ever before, and
makes the girl not at all. She doesn't
wear enough.
If you have just enough of it, money
will tighten your load. Too little or
too much balance the scales of dis
content.
Life consists of being little and
wishing one were big, and then being
big and wishing one were little again
and free from care.
If you meet man who has but little
to say don't get him started on his
hobby or you will have occasion to
change your opinion of him.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1915-06-29
THE CLEWS' REVIEW.

This country never witnessed bust
ness conducted under so many COM
pick conditions as at present" writes
Henry Clews, the New York banker
in his current weekly financial re-
view. Not even during our Civil
war; he goes on, was the situation
so confusing, for then the conflict
was at least within our own borders
and the consequences were much
more easily measured than in the case
of the highly complicated European
struggle now convulsing the entire
civilized world. So numerous and so
violent are the forces at work that no
reliable judgment can be formed as to
their ultimate effects; and the wisest
men are those who try to walk day
by day rather than taking strides into
the future. The Decentralization of
our foreign trade brought on by the
war continues unabated. Imports
have been coming in somewhat more
freely, resulting fortunately in much
needed improvement in our customs
revenue. Our exports also continue
very heavy. owing chiefly to ship
ments of foodstuffs, also of war ma
terial which are going outward on n
steadily increasing movement When
low in vigorous fashion. Europe will
be so absorbed in rebuilding and so
crippled in productive capacity as to
have little to sell in the form of mer-
chandise to this country The dis
ruption of established business condi-
tons, the raising of new tariff walls,
the making of new treaties, the over
coming of bitter prejudices and the
necessity of making endless new adj
justments will all tend to keep our
foreign trade in a state of chaos long
after peace is established. Our i'm
ports will naturally be more affected
in volume than exports, because of
Europe's inability to sell. Our exports
of agricultural products may not be
seriously impaired; in fact we may
have to feed Europe while her whole
energy is given over to rebuilding, but
there will be much less reason for
confidence in our ability to win for
eign markets for our manufactures a
year or two hence than there is
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1915-06-29
DOLLARS VS.. PATRIOTISM.

Patriotism too often, and not only
in this country but the world over,
with the possible exception of Ger
many, is forgotten in the chase for
dollars and cents. In England, for
instance, the greed of the capital that
is concerned with the making of mu-
nitions of war. is responsible for the
serious labor troubles there that are
so sorely handicapping the British
soldiers in the field. In these United
States, the military and naval authori-
ties are confronted with the resigna-
tions of talented officers who are
handing in their commissions to take
fat-salaried jobs with arms and am
munitiOn factories
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1915-06-29

They hadn't gone but few steps
till they heard voices and, so quickly
they hardly had time to hide three
children ran out in front OF the very
bushes that hid the two SQUIRRELS
Though the squirrels kept very still.
the children spied their bright ewes
and held out handsful of nuts and
crackerjack.
Had we better take it?" asked
Reddy, for he was new to the park
ways. you see. rs it safe -
Surely, they want us to feast with
them" replied the blind squirrel fear
lessly, so out they went and ate All
the children had. 1t was not long till
the children spied the blind squirrels
lack of an eye.
"Oh, look" cried the biggest bow
this is half blind SQUIRREL Let's
call him Cyclops, and come here every
day to feed him" So that is the wav
the blind squirrel got his name
(Copyright-Clara Ingram Judson.)
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1915-06-29
NEW FRUIT JUICES FOR HOME,

That the juice of currants, black
berries, black raspberries, sour cher
ries and peaches may be prepared and
kept as successfully as grape juice and
by the same methods, has now been
demonstrated in the course of a series
of investigations which the United
States department of agriculture is
conducting into the whole complicated
question of fruit juices. The juices of
the fruits mentioned, it has been
found. retain their characteristic COL
or and flavor after being sterilized and
stored away and can, therefore, be
made available for use throughout the
year in households and at soda foun-
tains, etc. In this way it is thought
much fruit that has hitherto been al
lowed to go to waste may be utilized.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1915-06-29
An Up-to-Date Woman.

|
The telephone on the weather di-
rector's deck tinkled merrily and the
official answered.
'sThis is Mrs. Frisby talking" said
81 want to ask you if it is going to
rain
II can't say for certain, madam"
he replied, but 1 think it is alto
gether likely to rain"
rs it going to snow?'
1T may snow some time today.
think perhaps it will
1T is going to soot?"
''WHAT?"
WHAT"
II mean is@sthere going to be an
east wind that will blow. the SCOT
from the glue factory chimney over
Yes, the wind will be in the east
all day"
Thanks; then will hang out my
clothes. If you had said it wasn't
snow and that the wind wasn't going
to blow from the east 1 wouldn't have
hung them out. I always put the re-
verse English on the weather predic-
So Say We All of Us.
The Scotchman, wishing to know
his fate at once, telegraphed pro-
posa1 of marriage to the lady of his
choice. After spending the entire day
ly rewarded late in the evening by
an affirmative answer.
IF 1 were YOU" suggested the OPP
orator when he delivered the message,
I'D think twice before I'd marry
girl that kept me waiting all day for
my answer
Ma, na," retorted the Scott. THE
lass who waits for the night rates is
the lass for me-
Not Naming Any Names,
There was a dame in our town
Whose appetite was hearty;
She always made her hostess frown
When she went to a party.
Too Attractive.
Anna Helds troupe of bare-kneed
zouaves doesn't seem to be driving the
Germans back to Berlin very fast.
We Give 1t Up.
r. K. NJ: Why is every six-footer
"strapping" and every blonde pc
tite?'
Changed Instruments.
Henry used to play the fiddle
In the good old winter time.
First two couples down the middle
Rang his voice In tones sublime.
It's months since Henry drew his
Good old bow with studied pose;
All that he has time to do is
Just to plaYgthe gsTden hose.
No wonder.
Lord Northcliffe is sore. They are
calling him the Hearst of England.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1915-06-29
From Other Pens
IT CANNOT BE DONE.

IT CANNOT BE DONE.
President Wilson has expressed fire.
quently the wish that he could meet
persons upon a familiar footing with
out his being for the time president of
the United States. He came very near
to having a conversation of that kind
when he offered, by telephone, hfS
congratulations to Miss Tumulty, the
13-year-old daughter of his secretary,
upon her birthday. "Quit your JOSH
ing" flashed over the wire, in response
to the presidents dignified tender of
felicitations 1t must have depressed
the president much more than it en-
barrassed Miss Tumulty wnen both
learned that there had been a mis-
understanding, the little girl realizing
that it was really the president who
had called her up, and the president
realizing that her badinage was not
intended for his ear, but was flung
along the wire at a supposed practical
joker posing as president. The presi-
dent got as near to the realization of
his ambition it is possible for him
to get, yet how far he was from it
Louisville Courier-Journal
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1915-06-29
EUening Chat
What Would You Like to BE:
BY RUTH CAMERON.

My small nephew has just reached
that stage Of his existence when he
wants to be a fireman.
His greatest hero is the chief of the
fire department and he would rather
watch the passing fire teams than 4
circus parade.
When we tell him he may possibly
change his mind before he -.rows up
he looks at us with the all-wise eyes OF
youth and wonders why GrOwn-ups
say such silly things.
Can you remember, masculine read
er friends q wonder if there are any,
or if only women read what 4 woman
writes), can you remember the time
when you wanted to be a fireman?
OF course there was such time. IT
seems to me that there is something
not quite normal about a boy who has
never wanted to be a fireman and a
sailor.
Also it must be very unusual girl
who has not at different stages of her
career decided to be an actress and a
trained nurse.
The two professions are express
ions of fundamental feminine instincts
The feminine desire to foster and cher
ish something weaker than itself is q
part of the maternal instinct and finds
natural expression in the ambition tic
be a nurse. The nurse is somewhere
in every normal woman. Women
says Balzac, ARE like the angels;
those who suffer belong to them"
While the equally biological desire
to attract admiration and he desire
for emotional excitement think to find
perfect satisfaction in the life of an
actress.
Anent my nephew's ambition a
group of us drifted into talk OF our
past and present ambitions and found
our comparisons of notes interesting
and revealing.
The childish ambitions were fitting
ly incongruous. The lawyer had
wanted to be a plumber; the business
man had threatentd to run away and
be a sailor; the student had been en-
amoured of the career of wrecker of
old buildings q wonder that this does
not more often appeal to the small
boy); the little lady-mother astonished
US by saying that she had eaten her
heart out with desire to be a circus
rider; while the cheerful spinster
laughed and sighed together as she
told that when grown-ups had asked
her what she was going to be, she
had always said she would marry and
have twelve children
We laughed at these childish am
billions and then, passing on, found
that we had not yet done with long
ings to be something that we were not.
The Stenographer told with eyes
that shone as 1 had never seen them
before, how she would love to be an
interior decorator.
The librarian longs to go from the
world of books into the world of life,
and having the habit of taking what
she wants instead of bewailing that
she can't have it, is actually consider
ling taking a position in a big depart
ment store.
Altogether it was most revealing
bit of talk. I suspect that our un-
fulfilled ambitions are often a closer
index of ourselves than our outer lives.
Suppose you start the conversational
ball rolling in that direction sometime
when you think you d like an interest
ing conversation
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1915-06-29

army and the navy are not ready to
do the work which may be eventually
imposed upon them: but they are far
better prepared than are the mind ard
will of the American nation. If the
people are to count in the present cri-
sis. if they are to exercise the control
over their foreign policy which the
democracie5 of Europe have not pos
sessed, they must make up their minds
what the true objects of such a for
eign policy are and how such objects
are best to be obtained
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1915-06-29
A NEED AT THE ZOO.

Topeka has the nucleus for a mighty
fine zoo at Gage park. And if this
interesting and instructive institution
is to be continued and developed pro-
vision assuredly. should be made for
an adequate housing of the animals.
There is no time like the present to
do the things that need to be done
And it is to be hoped that the city
commissioners can find a way to set
aside some money to begin the con-
struction of quarters for the animals
at this park that their no more than
humane treatment demands.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1915-06-29
Family Portraits.

There is a beautiful horne on Long
Island that the owner wishes to lease
for the summer. Two parvenus with
social ambition thought this residence
might be the means of launching them
into the local society, so they went to
look it over. Upon entering the bou-
doir of a young woman member the
family, their eyes fell upon beautiful
Madonna on the WALL. They also OBJ
served a Beatrice Cenci. One of the
party said, well if we do take this
house. will you, please remove the
family portraits ?'-Judge.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1915-06-29
POINTED PARAGRAPHS.
1From the Chicago News.

I
Is Vaughn tongue a vehicle of
speech:
Children who have measles are
bound to be rash.
The one absolutely certain thing in
life is its uncertainty.
When it comes to debt, most men
are glad they are not in it.
Some clocks are almost human; they
very SELDOM tell the truth.
The camera never flatters, but too
often the retoucher has to be guilty.
A woman's idea of satisfactory
husband is one she can make Jealous.
The great trouble with some men
who were heroes yesterday is that they
al forgotten today.
During the courtship a man thinks
Of taking unto himself a mate; but
after marriage he is apt to discover
that he took a captain
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1915-06-29
Kansas Comment
rHE R11c HI1NrERs.

THE BOOT
1t is generally supposed that ento-
mologists are mostlyro be found IN OF
about colleges but this seems TO De
disproven by the large NUMBER OF
scientists that are developed in every
gators and are guided by one law OF
life-that every chip has bug un-
der it, and the appearance or emp
is a challenge for them to set ABOUT
industriously to find out what particuT,
lar species is under that partlcu-
lar chip One popularity ABOUT
their scientific research, however
is that they don't choose their
own chips, in fact are seldom
known to make any chips but SIT
around until their next door neighbor
gets busy and a chip flies over the
fence, then they put on their specs
and try to find out what bug is under
that fellows chip. 1t matters not
whether he is endeavoring to roster
an orphanage, a town hall or a rail-
road, just as soon as he starts the
chips to flying, these "bugologlstS
begin to look around under each one
for some Shiny, crawling bug. Their
contributions to the cause of science
may be worth while but If they Joined
hands to help make more chips fly,
their town would go forward by leaps
and bounds instead of being stuck all
over with fossilized remains OF the
bugs that have been dug up from un-
der some optimist's snips. What every
town needs is not a Rockefeller foun-
dation for the advancement of science
but a lot of fellows to pick up an ak
and make the chips fly.-Olathe Inde-
pendent.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1915-06-29
Journal Entries

Everybody seems to want to act as
q mentor for somebody else.
+ + J.
Matchmaking mothers usually make
a matrimonial mess of it for their
daughters.
- +
The wise man usually carries an
umbrella for a cleverer fellow to carry
away.
I. i. i.
Wait until you can laugh at a joke
at your own expense before you play
one on some other person.
I. i. j
A good deal is heard about the aver
age man, but the average man is of no
more than mediocre caliber.