Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1915-08-15
HE PLACES HAY FEVER
IN HIS LIST OF MYTHS
Contentious Man Also Pooh Poohs
Stories Regarding the Power
of Pollen.
Thinks Prevalent Ideas Relating to
the Affection and It's Cause
Are Exaggerations.

The great hay fever myth starts on
Its annual two-month run today" de-
clared contentious man on Pennsyl-
vania avenue early-very early-this
morning.
THE official opening Of the hay-fever
program" he continued, speaking to tho
atmosphere in general and q friend in
particular. follows closely after that
other myth, Friday the 18th, which
was exploded the same day it was
born. Did anything unusual happen
Friday? Didn't the day run of pretty
much the same as all days do7 Didn't
the Russians officially declare that they
had another German army in q trap,
and didn't the crafty Teutons escape
the same as on all other days7 Tho
sunshine Of yesterday proclaimed to all
the world the falsity in the belief of
portending evil on Friday the 18th.
His View Of the "Myth."
$50. likewise. I wish to show up In
its true colors this hay fever myth.
Hay fever is heralded each summer
with a whole lot of gush filled with
sneezes and ker-shews, and other
queer-looking spellings supposed to
indicate to the lay mind the sounds
made when a person sneezes. To
listen to some people talk you would
think everybody In the world was
going around afflicted with hay fever
from now until the fall.
II haven't got hay fever. Neither
have You. None of your friends has,
I'll bet. I know that none of mine
has. So why should we bother about
hay fever? I suppose there are peo-
pie who are afflicted with this disease,
but personally I believe they are as
rare as Englishmen tn Constanti-
nople.
"These funny writer's who try to
make the innocent reader believe that
city, country, mountains and seashore
are crammed and damned with hay fe-
verish folks have another trick up
their literary sleeve they always
rhey declare and assert that pollen In
the air is what makes people with hay
fever sneeze. They say that dust laden
with pollen from flowers just naturally
scares the sneezes out of the system.
Which may be true, but
Briefly Discusses Pollen.
"Say. did you ever see clouds of pol
len floating up and down Pennsylvania
avenue? That's what I want to know?
To listen to- these funny-fellers tell
about it, you would imagine great
clouds of pollen rolled around Amer
can cities like a fog. or like these
clouds of gas the Germans are direct
ing against the allied troops. You
would think all the pollen in all the
roses and buttercups and pond lilies
md vio1efS and SunhOwera and all the
rest of the flora of the northern hemi-
sphere had modified and was wrath
fully disseminating itself over the land
in great billowy clouds, hunting
through the streets Of our cities for the
poor individuals afflicted with this
mythical thing called hay fever. You
would imagine the noses of these same
mythical sufferers were the haven of all
pollen.
the round pollens, and the cunning lit
tie lopsided poilens, and the triangular
Notwithstanding through the world
to land with a certain vegetable glee-
fulness in the proboscises Of hay-fever-
stricken patients? Cant you call up
a mental picture of a large chunk OF
pollen from German sugar-beet
taking the trenches of a French hay
fever sufferer, and making itself at home
in his nose until it is sneezed away?
Announces He Is a Skeptic.
"No. I can't see this hay fever thing,
at all think hay fever is tremen-
dously overrated, and believe the world
will uphold me, except those few who
really have the disease. OF course, I'm
not saying it does not exist It does
But it doesn't cut the figure some
would have US believe, any more than
"Sure. if I get it I'll be glad to let