Five Mile Beach weekly journal., 1915-07-02
Judge Hoke of
Sandy Bend
By M. QUAD
Copyright, 1915. by the Mcclure
Newspaper Syndicate.
By M QUAD

When the court at n benu nau
been opened In due and legal form
Judge Hoke assumed what he con-
sidered a proper judicial dignity and
said:
This ar a case such as we hev new
er had afore us before, but we think
we kin straighten out the kinks and
do iestice to all. Three days ago that
red headed critter over thar, who calls
hisself Tom Jones, come humpin' down
the trail from Big Find to ak IL thar
was any law In this kentry and to
boiler fur jestice. He had a wife up
thar at Big Find. He went home n
evenin' to find that she had skipped
with another man. The name of that
man was Abe Skinner, and that's him
over thar with the broken los
What ginerally happens out yere in
this land o. gold and hard times when
our wife runs awayf If we amt
mighty glad of it, which we mostly be,
we git on to her tracks and f0ller EN-
till we overtake her. If she's alone
we take her by the ear and lead her
back. If she's with a critter we pop
him over. Thar amt no law In the
case, but the custom is purity well
known. The man who steals another
mans wife expects to be popped by
the injoored husband, and he likewise
expects to pop that same injoored hus-
band If he gifts the chance.
"Tom Jones didn't pursoo. Thar was
the broad trail before him, and he had
guns and knives and a boss, but he
hadn't the sand. He jest comes a
humpin' down yere to holler fur the
law and shrek fur jestice and to git
all men, includin' this court, down on
him fur his doggoneness. His wife,
who ar that female over thar with q
mouth as big as a bar'l, had gone of
with Abe Skinner as aforesaid and
had him headed for this very camp.
As they flies from Big Find they meets
up with Jim Hope, who's the cuss over
thar with the game leg and n eye
gone. Jim he stops 'em and sez:
"'Abe Skinner, what you got tharf
ga female
Who is sheT
""Tom Jones' wife,
".And what you a-dOin' with her?'
"'A-runnin' away TO Sandy Bend
""Then you needn't go no further.
I've beer wantin' a wife fur the last
six months, and l reckon I'll take her
off your handsr
"Waal,1' continued his honor, "Jim
Hope he had his gun plump on Abe
Skinner and his finger on the trigger,
and Abe had to give in. This we're
court can't Farm that the woman OBJ
jected to the change. On the contrary,
thar is evidence that she didn't keer a
continental, as Jim Hope is a better
lookin' critter than Abe Skinner. The
couple heads this way by the trail,
while Abe Skinner takes a short cut
and arrives fustly and comes to me to
yell fur jestice. Thar's two fellers
yellin' fur jestice and a third with
the M The woman gifts we're in
doc time, along with Jim Hope, and
over by the creek they meets Joe
Scott, who stops to say:
".Jim Hope, I was jest goin' out to
hunt fur one
"'What you mean?
4 W0ht q 1bd 0A1d "a a 4
and you git down and skipr
'TThar was a gun on Jim, and he had
to give the up. This court
can't l'arn that she shed a tear or did
any kickin', but Jim he comes whoopin'
down to me and wants law and jestice
and all that. That makes three of 'em
a-wantin', and so l tells the constable
to arrest Joe and the woman. Yere's
four men and one woman, and the law
pears to be purity badly tangled up.
Fustly, Tom Jones, is this woman your
wife?"
"Sartin she u.s." answered Tom.
"Hev you got the dockyments to
prove it?"
mo, but 1 married her In the Injun
Territory a var ago"
"Waal, this court has nothin' to do
with the Injun Territory, and that mar
rage won't stand yere unless the wom-
an wants it to. Mrs. Jones, as I will
call you, what made We run away from
Tom?"
"Got tired OF him." replied the wo-
man.
"Do You prefer Jim Hope or Joe
Scott?'
II amt pertickler."
"That makes the case easier. Hank
Williams, stand up"
Hank stood up and proved to be a
middle aged man of decent appearance.
blank, dye want a wife?" asked the
court.
81 dew" was the reply.
"Then I'll marry We to this woman"
"Hank Williams, will We take this de.
luded woman to be yer lawful wife,"
you betT'
"And will We, cherish and defend her
and keep all the other critters ofT
"I WILL