Omaha daily bee., 1915-11-16

that gives you the double cross. That's
the reason 80 many pretty boys are al
ways out on hunt for new job.
'If a fellow wants to get queered in
business, about the easiest way he can
do 1t is to have a lot OF NAMES and
sadies and Carries calling him up at
ali times of day over the phone.
I'm no lady's favorite myself, and so
I've escaped that particular 100000 'lt
I've seen plenty of good fellows get
sacked for no other reason than because
a lot of silly girls seemed to think they
had nothing to do but talk pink tea
chatter over the telephone.
II knew one fellow wha was the whole
works as an expert accountant. He was
regular bear in figures, but he could
never hold down a job because he was
simply telephoned out OF every gooo
thing that came his way About the time
he got busy OF morning, some bunch
Of dry goods with the hello" mania
would call him up to ask him VINO ne
didn't blow into the movies, or show up
at the fudge party, and the boss would
begin to give him the once over out OF
the slants of his eyes, and by the time
a few other relays of his feminine ad-
mIrers also demanded him at the tele-
phone booth, the poor fellow was done
for.
"It was NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS. Rer-re-
ouired slip in his envelope on Saturday
and all of no fault of his except knowing
a lot of women that were batty about
the long-distance conversation, ana who
seemed never to get on to the fact that
employers don't hire a man to wait not
air over the wires l guess that II Mamie
knew that her Archibald got cold feet
every time he heard the telephone bell
ring she'd cut out a few reams OF con-
versation over Mr. Edison's cute little
invention. It's no way to graft man
heart by jeopardizing his job.
You never know how idiotc giri
can be, anyway" said the Stehos-
rapher, until you hear the giggles ana
imbeciiity that she pours into tele-
phone receiver. It's enough to burn up
even a copper wire. Did you ever listen
TO the intellectual chirpfest that sweet
little thing will tear off?
'It'H 20 like this. Business OF calling
ND an office or store. and having man
stopped from his work. Boss Sowing
Man scared stiff. Then a voice over the
phone: Is that you Archie? Who's this
talking TO you? Don't you know me?
Don't you recognize my voice? Oh you
naughty boy. Yes, this is me. IL mean
/. Yes, it's Sadie. No. it's Mamie. He
he-h-e-e-e-e. No, don't want anything.
/ No, 1 haven't got anything to say. l
just thought I'd call you up because
didn't have anything else to do"
! Can you beat it7 And what do you
think the man is thinking at the other
end Of the wire?"
! Something with big big Dam 1t, /"
responded the Bookkeeper with feeling.
And that isn't the worst Of IT," went
on the stenographed; "a girl with a tele-
phone is worse than Sherlock Holmes
with a clue about hunting fellow down,
There's no earthly escape for him. II
he doesn't show up as often as she thinks
he should, she calls him up and he has
TO make good with an excuse. It's bad
enough for a woman to keep tab on a
man when he is married to her but the
telephone tab before marriage Is the
limit, and explains why there are SO
many old maids.
THE telephone puts Cupid out Of bust,
ness, for no wire connects with the
dungeon cell"
II don't believe in love-making over
the telephone anyway" said the Book,
keeper.
Same here" responded the stenog-
rapher. II don't want any man making
love to me with his mouth a thousand
miles off"
"Right-o." agreed the Bookkeeper
bending a little closer.