The Yale expositor., 1915-02-11

spiritual Microbe. but the Geezer knew
how to annex the Kale.
When Providence is directing the
Handouts. she very often slips some
Squarehead the canny Gift of cor
railing the Cush, but holds out all of
the delectable Attributes supposed to
distinguish Man from what you see
in the Cages at the Zoo.
After the Pater had earned his
Shaft in the Cemetery, Elan became
the Loud Noise around a dinky Manu-
featuring Plant down by the Yards.
The Cracker-Barrel Coterie and all
the Old Ladies who had become mus
cle-bound from welding the Sledge,
predicted that ELAN would put the Or
ganization into the Ditch, wrong side
up.
The Well-Wishers, the Brotherly
Lovers, and the total membership of
the Helping Hand Society sat back
waiting for Elan to be dug out of
the Debris, so they could collect Wit
ness Fees at the Post-mortem.
The Junior earned their abiding Dis
like by putting one across.
He made the Fossils sit up in their
padded Rocking Chairs and pay some
attention to the Idiot Child.
He never could hold down any Posi-
tion until tried out for a Captain of
Industry, and then he began to Bat
.450 and Field .99S.
ha bo
manufactured the Product, and the
Statesmen had unloaded it, and the
Collectors had brought in the Louies,
then Elan had to sit at Mahogany
Desk with a Picture of Claudine in
front of him, and figure how much of
the hard-earned Mazuma would be
doled out to his greedy Employees.
Sometimes he would be compelled
to fork over nearly half of the Gross,
whereupon his Heart would ache and
he would become Morose.
In few Years he had lot of new
Buildings, with Skylights and i'm
proved Machinery and all sorts of hui
name Appliances to enable the Work
ing Force to increase the Output.
As the Bank-Account expanded and
the Happy Couple found themselves
on Plush, Claudine began to scan the
Horizon and act restless-like.
She said the Home Town was I'M
possible. 1t certainly did seem Con-
| trary to Reason.
Any Woman with a salaried Hus-
band could bust into Society If she
sang in Choir or owned an Ice-Cream
| Freezer.
Claudine was for migrating to some
| high-toned Community beyond the
Rising Sun, where she could sit in
Marble Halls and compare Jewelry
! with proud Duennas of her own Sta
tion.
Seeing Claudine at the corner of
Sth and Central, waiting for the Green
| Car, one would not have suspected
that she harbored Intentions on the
/ Court Circles of Europe. One would
merely have guessed that she was on
her way TO the Drug Store to purchase
much Camphor.
But she had taken a Peek at the
Palm Rooms and the powdered
Lackeys and the Tea Riot at the
Plaza, and she was painting inwardly.
She wanted to hang a silver bell
around her neck and go galloping
with the white-faced Thoroughbreds.
It was no good trying to work up
Speed on a half-mile track in the
| Prairie Mud.
Once in a while Claudine made a
bold Sashay to start something devil
ish, but the Ffllies trained on the
Farm did not seem gated for the
Grand Circuit.
AS for the Servant Problem, it was
something Ferocious. City Help could
not be lured to the Tall Grass, and all
the Locals had been schooled at the
Railway Eating-House.
Elan and Claudine had a Cook
named Gusta, born somewhere near
the Arctic Circle in Europe.
Her Fried Chicken drowned in thick