Connecticut western news., 1915-06-24

was given for one blase auditor, anl Schofeld & Williams looked depreSS- Il. Then followed an interval when the band played in vain.
 About o'clock Schofield X Will liamS were gloomily discussing vari- ous unpromiSing devices for startling the public into a renewal of interest. when another patron unexpectedly ap- peared and paid a cent for his admis- sion. News of the Big Show and Au- scum of Curiosities had at last pene- trated the far, cold spaces of mterstel- lar niceness, for thls. new patron con. sisted of no less than Rode rick AiaSs- worth Bitts. Jr.. escaped Ill Il white sailor suit from tbe manor during perIOu OI severe m;IlcIuuI and rutorIai preUcCupatiOn.
 He seated himself without barley. and the putTOrmance Was offered Tor his entertainm, It with admirable con- ScientiuuSneSS. True to the Lady Clara caste and training. ltoderick'S pale. fat face expressed nothing except an im- perviUuS superiority and. aS he sat. cold and uMImprC sscd upon the front bench. like a large. white lump. it must De said that he made discourag.ng audience ito play to- He was not. however. nreSpOHSlve-far from it. lie offered comment very chilling to the warm grandlloquence of the orator.
 That's my Uncle Ethelberts dachs- hund. be remarked at the beginning of the lecture. You better take him back if you don't want to get arrest ed" And when Penrod, rather uneasi- ly ignoring the interruption. proceeded to the exploitation of the genuine. fHll blooded Indian dog, Duke, Why don't you try to give that old dog away?' asked Roderick. You couldn't sell him."
 My papa would buy me lots better coon than that" was the information volunteered little later. "only I wouldn't want the nasty old thing"
 Herman of the missing finger obtain ed no greater indulgence. "Pooh.' said Roderick. We have two fox ter riers ill our stables that took prizes at the kennel show. and their tails were bit off. There's man that always bites fox terriers tails off"
 "Oh, my gosh, what d lie." exclaim- ed Sam Williams ignorantly. Go on with the show, whether he likes it or not: Penrod. He's paid his money"
 Nerman. confident in his own singu- lar powers, chuckled openly at the failure of the other attractions to charm the frosty visitor. and when his turn came poured forth a torrent of conversation which was straightwsy damned.
 "Rottent' said MT. Bitts languidly. Anybody could talk like that 1 could do it if l wanted to-
 Verman paused suddenly.
 ''Yes, you couldr' exclaimed Penrod. stung. Lets hear you do it then
 "Yessir!' the other partner shouted. Let's just hear you do it!''
 "I said I could if I wanted to-" re- sponded Roderick. "I didn't say I would"
 "Yay! Knows he can't!' sneered Sam.
 'I can, too, if try
 Well. let's hear you try"
 So challenged, the visitor did try, but in the absence of an impartial jury his effort was considered so pro- nOunced failure that he was howled down. derided and mocked with great clamors.
 Anyway" said Roderick when things had quieted down, If I couldn't get up a better show than this I'd sell out and leave town"
 Not having enough presence of mind to inquire what he would sell out, his adversaries replied with mere formless wells of scorn.
 Il could get up a better show than this with my left hand" Roderick as serted.
 Well, what would you have in your ole show?" asked Penrod, condescend- ing to language.
 That's all right what I'd have. I'd have enough"
 "You couldn't get Herman and Yer man in your ole show"
 No. and I wouldn't want 'em, ei- ther."
 Well, what would you have?" insist ed Penrod derisivcly. You'd have to have sumpthing. You couldn't be show yourself"
 How do you know?" This was but meandering while waiting for ideas and evoked another yell.
 You think you could be a show all by yourself?" demanded Penrod.
 How do you know I couldn't?"
 Two white boys and two black boys Shrickcd ther scorn of the boaster.
 "I could toor' Roderick raised his voice to a sudden howl, obtaining a hearing.
 Well, why don't you tell us how?"
 ''Wcll. I know how, all right" said Rodyrick. If anybody asks you you can just tell him I know how, all right
 ''Why. you can't do anything" Sam began argumentatively "You talk about being a show all by yourself. What could you try to do? Show us