Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1915-03-01
Everybody Grins at Blush
ing Couples at Every
Stage Of Journey on
Honeymoon Express"
By a WOMAN REPORTER

pedal extremities.
Getting married at Elkton, that Hyme-
neal hamlet compared to which the orig
inaI Gretna Green would look like the
Deserted Village at the cold break of
dawn. is all this and a little bit more, and
yet. despite this indlsputable fact, thou
sand upon thousand Of couples from
Pennsylvania. New Jersey, Delaware and
New York flock annually in veritable
droves to the little Maryland town to
have the marriage knot tied.
why?
Down at Elkton they say It is because
the "crool, crool' laws Of the above-men-
toned States have put such silly, repre-
henslble restrictions upon marriage as an
ago limitation or a residence requirement.
ANY girl of 49," say they proudly "can
be married here inside Of fve minutes
without the consent of her parents. We
don't believe in restricting early mar
rages.'
They don't, and 1t hasn't taken youthful
lovers long to find IL out.
Starting at Broad Street Station at
o'clock in the morning the Honeymoon
Express usually ships a goodly number of
| couples bound for Phlladelphias Gretna
Green. Furtively they buy their tickets.
In husky tones the prospective bride
| groom slips his 81 note under the ticket
| office window and murmurs in scarcely
audible whisper "Elkton, please"
| EVERYBODY GRINs.
why the deuce does that bally ass of
clerk grin so openly and unabashedly?
What's wrong with Elkton2 A man
might he going there for almost any
purpose. To visit a maiden aunt or to
sell a moving machine
But the gateman? What in the name
of Sam Hill is that asinlne fool smlrlslng
| at? Can't a man take train to Elkton
with his sister without becoming the butt
| of every humorous individual along the
| line?
The answer is He can't, particularly
If the SISTER" wears new willow plume
and straight-from-the-s patent leather
shoes.
The conductor who takes up the tickets,
too, Is a creature the quality of whose
mercy Is so strained as to be almost i'm
Derceptible.
"Elkton?" he says devlishly, in loud
and blatant tones and with a wicked
gleam In his eye "I'll let you know when
you get there. Don't you worry"
All Of the passengers who aren't going
to Ellkton enjoy the conductors fine dis
play of wit hugely. They crane their
necks and nudge each other and make
rude remarks. But this Is as nothing |
compared to the moment when the train |
really arrives.
All along the line the Honeymoon Ex- |
press has picked up couples An express |
in name only, 1t halts at every little tank |
town and takes them on. In two-by-twos /
they Come-an endless procession of pairs, |
embarking on a modern Noahs ark, as It |
were.
ENTER THE VULTURES.
"All out for EllSton."
The conductor has not forgotten his
promise. In ringing tones that penetrate
the car from end to end he sings the
phrase mockingly-once for every couple
present. They rise-the prospective brides
as pink as roses in June, the bridegrooms
wearing a sheeplsh expression which they
endeavor to pull into one of bulldog
ferocity.
A small army of unfed vultures leans
upon them as they descend from the
train. They are the bus Drivers of the
two rival companies that ply their nefari-
GUS trade between the station and the
marriage license bureau and the min
isters' houses.
No questions are asked and none are
necessary seemingly. No man or woman
ever came to Elltton alone, apparently
If they did they'd be arrested, doubtless,
for violating a long-established custom
of the country.
And there is only one way of treating
those who come in pairs. Without so
much as a by-your-leave, they are hus-
tied summarily into a machine of before
the-tiood construction. The driver having
captured his prey-four ordinarily. or six,
II he is lucky-relapses into a self-com-
placent tacturnity from which he does
not recover until the time comes to muir
mur 'S," which is the highwaymen's
price for abductlng the helpless loveIorn
ones.
Meanwhile the engineers. the conduc-
tors the passengers of the Honeymoon
Express, lean half way out of their {
various compartments to witness the per-
formance. Mockingly they hurl benedic-
lions and good wishes-not to say gibes
and ieers-after the couples and even the r
engine modifes its hiss to a caressing Z
ahug. The dulcet tones of the motor horn,
as the car proceeds slowly through the
,lllage announces the fact to the in
labitants that the Honeymoon Express
$ In, and the little girl who was induced
% come here under the delusion that the {
ceremony could be performed more quiet-
y at Elkton than anywhere else, cries a c
ew salty tears on the sleeve of her Johns
lyercoat. }
CLERK LINES EN- UP. =
The deputy at the marriage license
,ureau-by name William G, Purnell-is I
person as unfeellng as the railroad con- a
uctor. A man can't even get marriage
icense in privacy at Elkton. II l2 cou-
le come in on the express. Purnell lines !
he entire 12 up before him. like prisoners
I the bar, and administers the oath In Il
'holesale fashion. To the sentltiye BRIDE
rooms who protest he explains that this
necessary, for another train may come n
. at any moment and he can't take the ri
hance OF having his office swamped. el
.ong practice has endowed Purnen with n
peed and two minutes is all the time he b
equires TO Issue the laws sanction Ia
Two ministers apparently have a mo- ~
opoly OF the marrying business, ana the n,
lspieiously inclined might oe tempted 10 al
slieYe thar the ministers and the convey ~
nee companies had a tacit understanding | N
hich worked 10 the mutual beneht OF N
seh. ~
AT any rate no couple is ever consulted =
10 which minister they would prefer a,
he chauffeur assumes the responsibility 4,
nth dictRtorial mien he piles them mo =,
IS antiquated car again. whirls them 10 a Il
tile cottage signifies with a command -
g gesture that they are to enter ana y
H..