The Leon reporter. (Leon, Iowa) 1887-1930, 1915-01-21
Mr.. Perkins Lawn
Mower
3, NJ QUAD
b N. QUAD.
Copyright. 1914. by Associated Lft-
erary Press.


for ten minutes when she carelessly
queried:
Mr.. Perkins. please turn to that
diary Of yours and see what you tind
recorded under date Of Feb. 20"
with pleasure. Mrs. Perkins. Are
you on track Of something's"
"Just u little something"
"Well. here's the date
DO you find anything about lawn
mower?"
II do. 1t says that will either have
a lawn mower before the LIST Of April
or perish in the attempt"
lis it the LIST Of April?''
"Oh. yes"
Have you got the lawn mower yeti"
"Not yet"
II didn't know but that you had 1t
hidden away in coattail pocket and
was going to bring. it out and surprise
me. They have been moving their
lawns all around US.
Mrs. Perkins," he said after draw
ing long breath, II owe an explana-
ton"
Not in the least. Mr.. Perkins. That
is simply your way of doing business"
ION the evening of Feb 20, when I
uttered the words recorded here.
fully and firmly meant to purchase
lawn mower Of the latest pattern at an
early date in the spring"
''Poor man!'
But it so happened that l got hold
Of some vital statistics in newspa-
per-"
How terrible"'
There was list of deaths by heart
failure 1t numbered hundreds"
''And you did not want to die of
heart failure:"
Il had no great longing to. I went
to our family doctor and put the case
up to him. and he shouted at me:
"'Perkins. are you born fool!'
Ono
"'Then don't talk about pushing
lawn mower around. With your heart
the way it is it would mean sure death
to you"
"While if you continued to simply
play poker you might live hundred
years." said Mrs. Perkins.
Come, come, my dear-this Is not a
matter for sarcasm. There are other
risks besides heart failure"
Sweating your collar is one"
Suppose that some enemy of mine
throws bomb amid the grass and l
run the mower against it,"
Awful! Awfulv
Mrs. Perkins. am afraid that you
don't understand the situation. In Al
bany last week as an eminent citizen
was moving his lawn there was a sud-
den explosion"
But don't they generally come sud
denly?"
There was a sudden explosion, and
be was killed dead"
''Poor man! He shouldn't have been
killed more than half dead! Go on.
Mr.. Perkins. Did the boiler Of the
lawn mower burst, or did some one
fire cannon at him:"
1.-The machinery got heated up, ! be-
lieve. He was pushing it too fast"
"A thing that could never happen to
you, Mr. Perkins"
And, again, at Syracuse man who
was lawn moving was struck dead by
a thunderbolt."
He must have had nickel in bis
pocket to attract 1t"
"And so, Mrs. Perkins. with all these
warnings hanging over me thought 1t
best
mot to get mower. Of course"
Something that way. my dear"
'And not to hire man to come with
his own mower?"
Have the right to subject him to
such risks?"
"Of course not Just let the grass
grow as high as the fence-as high as
the trees We shall want to camp out
there little later. And the higher the
grass the less OF the house you see.
Mrs, Perkins. you are inclined to
acrimony." said Mr.. Perkins
Grass seven feet high will probably
help 1t. If you were to use sickle or
scythe on the lawn would 1t give you
heart failure?"
Il spoke Of that to the doctor. He
said he wasn't sure about It. but would
look up the matter and report =
..And when can we look for this re-
port?''
by December or January. He is a
very busy man. you know"
"Yes. know. and 80 are you. Mr.
Perkins. how much oil does lawn
mower consume In day.?
about a gallon"
"And what Is the cost?"
"a dollar and half.''
But why didn't you use this as an
argument"
II knew had forgotten something"
f'And you had forgotten the fact. A
mower won't last over month.
will it?''
about month
''And then It must be thrown away?
Why didn't you make that statement
to strengthen your case?'
II wish to add 1t now"
yxyy-,, ,,,o,,1xl - t,N,- -, - 40