Belding banner. (Belding, Mich.) 1889-1918, 1915-09-22
A Shrewd Secretary

Inc honof and dignity attaching to
the office Of u. S. senator often over
shadows some of the grave response
bilities and arduous duties of the posi-
ton, but they exist just the same. For
example, every senator's constituents
look to him to furnish them jobs, tran
sact matters of private business for
them and to perform for them a null
titude of miscellaneous services that
cannot logically be considered as part
of the legitimate duties of legislator.
In fact, requests for favors of this
kind are so numerous that a large
proportion of the time of most sena-
tors private secretaries is occupied
in looking after them.
The private secretary Of Senator
Faulkner of West Virginia had in
structions from his superior to handle
in the most diplomatic manner pos
sibie all such correspondence that
came in. Also he had strict orders to
prevent at any cost every bother
some looking constituent from getting
into the private office. One day among
the voluminous heap of letters dumped
upon his desk asking for pensions,
free seeds, free documents, appoint
ments to the military or naval acad-
envy and every other conceivable kind
of favor, the secretary found a letter
from a West Virginian requesting
Senator Faulkner to purchase from
certain Washington department store
suit of clothes offered for $685. and
send it to him.
At first the secretary did not know
what to do about the matter but after
bordering while he went to the
store designated and ordered suit to
be sent TO the senator's constituent.
BE sure and send the biggest suit
you've got in the house." he stipulat-
ed; lit ought to be several times as
big as the average mans suit.
q Some weeks latter when the senator
was back home he met the man for
whom his secretary had gone shop
ping. "Say, senator" he began, II
want to ask why in the world you sent
that suit so big. The thing only cost
$685. in the beginning but had to pay
the tailor in town So TO cut it down to
my size and he got out of it enough
material to make my 12-year-old boy
a whole suit of clothes and his sister
a skirt.
Now Of course the senator knew
nothing of the mountaineer, of his
request or the secretary action IN
buying the suit of clothes but he was
shrewd enough to humble an answer
to the effect that the diversified suit
was the best he could do. When he
returned to Washington he sought an
explanation from his private secre-
tary. "A man | never saw or heard
of before" he said, held me up and
censured me for sending him a suit
that didn't fit"
1T was this way" explained the
secretary, "a Letter came to you asking
you to send this man a suit of clothes.
| thought at first | would pay no at
tention to it at all and then | figured
that it might hurt you politically. |
decided to make bluff of complying
with the request and had the store
keeper send as nit that was big
enough for a young elephant"
What was the idea? ?" queried the
puzzled senator.
Here's the way figured it out: If
we send him suit that fits all right
he'll tell all his friends and all we can
get done hereafter will be to go shop
ping and buy suits of clothes for your
As it is now, you needn't
worry about being asked to do much
more shopping for clothes"