Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1915-08-14
A STUDY IN ECONOMY.

Scene l. (Club cafe. Tanker and
l.isson at a table. Tanker expounds.)
Yes, as I was saying. my wife doesn't
know the meaning of the word save
She's always spending money for
something she doesn't need. Have
another cigar. old man. l put all
the ready money ! had into a car
a man needs a little recreation after
business hours-and what does she
do but up and buy a piano! She
doesn't know one note from another,
Ind naturally that can a course Of
lessons. Guess we'd better have just
another little bottle Of that wine.
hadn't we? I've just been moving
into larger and better Offices. ! got
tired of that dingy little hole l was
in. Help business1 Well, I don't
know about that part OF it. Busi-
ness was all right in the old place.
Still. I though I'd like a change even.
il the rent is a whole lot higher.
Well, the point IS, no sooner dol
moye than she begins to worry the
life out of me about moving out OF
our fiat into a bigger, more expensive
one further downtown. And she had
no earthly reason except that she
didn't like the neighborhood we were
i'll. Then, as soon as we got moved.
she began to buy all sorts OF high
priced furniture. And she knew as
well as l did that / had just put .
tmall fortune into new Office fixtures.
She said our old stuff wasn't good
enough for the new location. That's
the way it goes. l do all the econo-
MIXING. No. no. old chap. this ones
on me-. "a
!; The whole thing is enough to dis
courage a man. A woman ought to
be willing to do ON of the saving.
but no, just as soon as l think I'm
beginning to get on my feet, she
runs me way into debt again for
some kind of nonsense. She spei.Is
in enormous amount on clothes.
like to see a oma dress we'll. but
there's a limit. o yes, l like to dress
well myself, but I'll bet l don't spend
lalf as much as she does on clothes.
Well. say two-thirds OF three-ouar-
tiers. And the candy bills she runs
up! You'd naturally suppose a full
grown woman could exist without
candy every minute. My turn again.
old man. And try another OF these
cigars. Yes. they sell for q quarter.
but l get them BY the box
I'll tell you what made me mora
disguised than anything else, and
that's a brand-new proposition she
sprang on me last night. She already
] as a cook and a housemaid, and now
what does she want but a butlerl
Think of it. on my income! Whv.
we'll simply go to smash II a halt
isn't called pretty / told her
we couldn't afford it. and she asked
the why l didn't discharge the chauf-
ieur. Said Id learned how to run
,he car. and didn't need him any
'nore. l suppose there is something
in that. but who wants to be grimed
Up all the time from monkeyinR with
= lot Of greasy machinery? Sorry
you're going. Let's have a little drink
first. Good-by. If you hear of my
going bankrupt. remember l prophe-
sled it. So-long.
Scene II. "a grocery-store. Tan
lcr still cxpounding.)-Good Lordl
FIFTY cents for butter? When l saw
it Oh the bill, l told my wife it must
DC a mistake. And forty-eight for
eggs! No wonder a man can't get
along these days. Somebody's in wait
70 rob him from the time he gets
UP iii he goes to bed. You aren't
70 blame for the prices? Maybe not,
but who is? They all say the same
khing--somcone else is at the bottom
/ bf it. All ! can say is, it's about time
something was done. People of mod
crate incomes are all going down and
out unless somebody gets busy be-
fore long and straightens things our
a little. It's a case OF pinch and,
scrimp and save all the time.
Well. ! won't be able to pay the
whole bill this time. Some Of it will
have to go over till next month. The
Lord knows how I'm going to make
both ends meet If you keep on lifting
prices. i no ooner sec a chance OF
getting on to my feet than up goes
Everything another notch. It's get
hing 30 a man has to be a millionaire
in order TO keep the game going.
exit, still talking)--lralter 6. Doty,