The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1915-07-26
Unreasonable Interference.

Oule6SO00Dle interference.
~. By JOHN ID. BARRY.
Since publishing an article recently Inter
ference" have received letter saying that my
attitude is selfish. "What you call interference is
, Kindness" says this writer. "The people tina,
don't interfere are always thinking about them.
selves"
l agree that sel6shness often keeps people from
interfering with others. Here is the only good
thing that be said about selhshness.
The people, however, who consistently care.
full not to interfere with others have to exercise
a wholesome and considerate self-restraint
l tried to point out that there are times when
interference with others was not only right but
necessary. Such times occur comparatively sell
dom.
What had in mind was the kind of interior
ence that causes people to prey others, in small
ways and in big, usually in matters of absurdly
slight importance. making simple and easy things
complicated and difficult and developing ill-feelng
This correspondent says that there are people
who like to be interferred with and feel neglected
if they not interferred with.
l agree. They oftener women than men.
But in my acquaintance can think of several
men of this kind.
Such people are usually to be found among
are likely to feel that they are neglected. They
illustrate one of the most unpleasant kinds of
egotism and sehshness. The more they are inter-
fered with the more their selhshness is eneour-
aged. Often they succeed in making the inter
ferers, the natural tyrants their slaves.
They let the interferers do much of their think
ing and their work for them. And, as a rule, the
more they let the intererers do for them the more
they exact.
They tyrannize over the tyrants.
Children the greatest of all sufferers from
interference. Sometimes they resent it bitterly.
sometimes it cripples them for life.
For interference tends to damage initiative 1t
may completely destroy initiative in the young.
1t resists the law of nature that encourages the
young to do things voluntarily, spontaneously, by
imitation.
Just as in adults, however, so in children inter-
ference may lead to their establishing tyranny
the tyrants.
There greater tyrants in the world than
children spoiled by interference by affectionate
relatives who continually trying to thwart
them and to do things for them
Many years ago happened to be present when
little girl. three four years old, was dress
ing. 1t interesting to see her reach out for
the garments held by her mother. 1t was plain
that she wished to dress herself. She was Civ
ing expression to a strong initiative, valuable
quality. But her mother wished to have the
pleasure of dressing the child. Instead of Civ
ing up each garment she would carefully adjust
it in place. incidentally she was interfering with
the chd's initiative, making it weaker in the di-
recton of seli-help.
| sawS that girl grow up. In everything she
did she showed her natural initiative. And this
a11v hxpa Cd he
love of the mother. 1t was too strong to be
destroyed. 1t simply took a turn Instead
of leading to self-control and energy, it led to
sclhshness and the control of the mother.
That child is a woman now with children Of
her own. Her mother lives with her and takes
care of the children. She herself spends most of
her time going to the theater and playing bridge
| sometimes hear say, in presence of
his very kind wife. 20, my dear, I want to do that
wrong. Let me do it wrong"
| have noticed that the moment he those
words his wife stops interfering. Then, in his
own way, he does trifing act, like pulling
down the window shade stirring the crate FIRE.
His humorous habit of defending himself from
petty interference at home has made his wife con-
scious of the little fault in her character The
humor in it, emphasized by repetition, operates as
a check and at the same time keeps her from
feeling hurt.
There is very important principle in the say
ing of that husband
We all like to do little things in ways that
other people may consider wrong And though
those ways might be wrong for other people, they
may be right for At any rate, they are our
ways. for us the easiest and best, because spon-
taneous.
And for us the right ways of other people
might be wrong, the hardest and the least de-
sirable because imposed from the outside
Moreover. wrong ways may be valuable. They
may lead to salutary mistakes.
The best lessons of life are the lessons of our
own mistakes.
The interferers of the world often interfere
with the best lessons of life