The Washington herald., 1915-08-09
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Special Correspondent of the Washington Herald.
New York, Aug. S.-'Tis a strange
world. indeed. Some time ago some
good, loveable Nuts. engaged in unlifting
this world, plucking figs from thistles.
spinning ropes of sand. razoring the
grindstone and belling the cat had a
meeting in Union Square-the Mecca of
the soap box silver tongues.
These uplifters ventured to say that
perhaps all was not for the best in the
best of possible worlds A few more
courageou lifted their voice until II
could be heard by the jobless sleepers
in tn" park. but no one was disturbed
yet the uplifters were clouted, pinched,
and thrown into the clnk.
Just now during the noon hour little
groups of war agitatorS bawl treason in
broken English, harangue the President,
defy the government and with every
breath vomit insults upon the country
whose bread they eat. There are a lot
of simple minded folk who would like to
know that these traitors are not slam
med into the cooler.
Yes" said a big strapring English
actor at the Lambs, Il tried to get in
the British army. but couldn't pass the
physical examination. The doctor said I
had a floating cartilage in my foot and
water on the knee"
why didn't you try the navy?" asked
Willie" Collier.
The coroner at Hampstead has found
that no one to blame for the death
OF Frank Holt who shot Morgan. The
only blame was placed on gravity and
it seems that it is unindictable.
J. Wade McG-ath. of the HarGrave.
motored from New York to Cleveland
few weeks ago and was forced one night
10 stop at small cross roads hotel in
Pennsylvania for the roads were bad. 1t
appears that the landlord of the hotel
was reckoned the meanest man in the
county.
He kept everything under lock and key
and there was no chance for a casual
caller to get pen, ink. soap. or anything
else free. The night MCGrath arrived II
hoy from the depot called with a mes
sage and looked at the old timepiec-
which hung on the wall.
When McGrath went down the next
day large sign hung over the face OF
the clock 1t read: This clock for the
use OF the hotel only
Lew Bailey owns a fighting club in
Philadelphia and the other day Tad"
the cartoonist went down to visit him.
Bailey believes in giving his patrons a
dollars worth of fight. Fans in the I'm
for little.
The night that Tad was there the
club drew A big crowd and Lew wanted
It to be a big fight. that the patrons
would return. He called in the warriors
for the first skirmish and told them to
90 to IL. They fought like whirlwinds
for five rounds and then slowed up. ana
some one in the gallery asked IL they
roomed together. Another yelled in fall
setto voice: stop the wanton brutal
fly
Finally Lew. who was 10 slip the win
ner s.. slid down to the ringsidc and
barkcd: Come on there--a little speed
One of the gasping boxers lifted hts
head and with witherins glance at
Bailey said: ''Whadda We want for five
bucks. q civil war -
why do you weep, little one?" 1t Is
n subway passenger speaking to a fair
young thing in the Seventy-second street
station. kind SIR she sobbed, "a bad
man iostled me in the train. He cut my
stocking open and I am shy seven iron
men-and-boo-bo-snif sniff-besides me
foot hoits''
Take of your shoe and see what's
In it, counseled the stranger. She did
and there was a diamond on which one
might raise maybe 200 seeds.
"Oh JOY" she cried. 1T was the bao
man who lost Ii. Isn't he stung?'
Hotel McAlpin Notes.
Charles Votion. Belgian who was