The weekly tribune and the Cape County herald. (Cape Girardeau, Mo.) 1914-1918, 1915-08-27
Col. T. Jeff, Is
threatening 10
Snatch P. O. Job
Man Who Taught Vice-Pres-
ident Marshall How t o
"Figger," May Snatch the
Position and Run.

S-h-h-h! Colonel T. Jeff Shorb is
going to bat again.!
He is hankering to become post
master of Cape Girardeau, and he in
formed friends confidentially yester-
day that he virtually had a strangle
hold on the position. 1t may get away
from him, but he doesn't think so.
Col Shorb is the man who taught
Vice President Marshall to read, write
and to "figger," and if that isn't
enough to land good fat job, then T.
Jefferson's political Judgment has
slipped right off the Christmas tree.
The Colonel did not seriously con-
slider making the race until he looked
over the list of candidates. eff either
of these men gets the place." he con-
flded to friends, then Democracy in
this neck of the woods is going to be
split up the spine"
He waited for several months, ex-
pecting that one of his close friends
would become a candidate, but when
none entered the race, he decided to
capture the plum.
Col. Shorb's reasons for believing
that his opponents would not make
good postmasters, are: He is against
Tom J. Juden because he says Mr.. Ju-
den copies Roosevelt and kisses all the
babies he meets. Mr.. Lewis would not
help the Democratic party, Col. T.
Jeff contends; and he considers D. A.
Glenn too old. DR.. ]. c. Vorbeck OPP
posed Col. Shorb's candidate for
mayor last spring, and for that rea-
son the Colonel is determined to spike
the physicians candidacy.
Col. Shorb contends that his train
ing made man of President Wilson,
assistant. When Col. T. Jeff took
charge of Tom Marshall, over in that
little red Indiana school house, the flu
ture looked pretty hazy for the pres
ent Vice President. But Col. Shorh
was determined to do what he could
for the boy.
"This youngin' has something in
him." was Col. Shorb's statement after
he had been spreading information be-
fore young Marshall less than three
weeks. Eyes, sir, this kid is cookoo,
remarked the Colonel after tutoring
Marshall two months. At the close OF
one term in that "deestrict school,
Tommy Marshall could read, write and
"figger.' Col. Shorb believed ther
that Tom Marshall could never forget
what his teacher did for him in that
term of school, and he is still under
that impression.
A short time ago the Colonel drop
ped few lines to the Vice President
just to rake up that old acquaintance
ship and to mention incidentally that
a vacancy was soon to occur in the
postmastership here. Anything you
can do for the man who started you
on the road to Washington will be ap-
preciated by yours truly" was about
the way the Colonel concluded his let
ter.
About a week later the Colonel re-
ceived letter from the United States
capital. "Pretty SOFT" remarked the
veteran contractor, as he began tear
ing the letter open. 1t began: "Mr
Thomas jefferson ShOrp." That
Thomas Jefferson part gave the
Colonel political standing. While the
Vice President didn't say that he
would Ego to the front" for the Colonel
he did say he was glad to renew the
acquaintanceship, but that looks pref
ty good when put in black and white.
Col. Shorb is making what might
be regarded as a home-spun race. He
has kept his movements a secret in
the past, but he limited yesterday that
he may decide to call upon Congress
man Russell and whisper something
into his ear that will decide the con-
test in the Colonel's home town.
But if he does, there'll be no brass
band accompanying him, he said 70,
publication.