The Washington herald., 1915-09-12
DER GERMAN COBBLER
He Makes His Shop an Up-to-date.

lost our grandmother on der same day
over our dog at der same time. Dis
nnd kes To dG sesns oe
'Vhell?"
Il have some spare time on my
hands just now. und I vhell pq$, in
it vhas in, I tell my clerk to give
you the, very best gas und not mix
any molasses with it"
more don brother would do. 1t vhill
show me dot you vhas der biggest
hearted man in der world never
haf sooch kindness offered me before,
eyes"
In two days Mr.. Sprickman gets =.
IRON % pipe and run der 'p Pipe anf into Po' my lS
shop Den Mr. Sprickman gets some
gas fixtures. DER vhas four lights.
Und my wife she claps her hands und
In three or four days a man comes in
nit big iron box ON his back and
says to me:
Hello, Dutchy-here vhas your ga.
meter"
You can put it by der back dcsr."
Oh. but she must go inside. vhtl,
how much gas you vhill burn"
I can tell you dot now. my friend.
I shall burn all l can"
I'm five days more Mr.. sprickman
on IN his afstq aee He vSss Soks mi,
see, him. We, shake hands und hog
Han "Hans, a. didn't I tell you So"
for it. I can do twice as much WORK
as before und I don't smell one single
SDrlCEman II vh2S Pnnd
man like you. If somebody would
break your neck nit club you would
be N IN two peee aoms
from his eyes und den takes a bill
from his pocket und hands it out tc
But what about this little bill.
Hans? We might IS well settle up to-
"Biil? Bill: Was deir some bill?"
YOU to pay me $3.50 for my work.
Dot vhas way cheap. If I had done
dat wor Saan fer eroS Mr. Wanderbils it would
ut ike Gssn 9s You qna Know cons
down NIT der long green. Hans"
Il don't come, down init der long
greeemnot eo just den: den / come down on
man haf to hit me Ave times with his
hammer before l vhas all right again.
But cant TAX to hs him MY h. thFcn TSi,
see me. some odder time. und he goes
avhay."
1t vhas four days before I vhas
man again. and 1 believes he makes
some shokes about his bill. Den comes
a man from der gas office. He walks
door to look at dat meter His hair
rose up und lifted his hat. und his
eyes We're like two tea cups
1T nn1i Vhas a more s dan allrisht. Hans
he replied You have burned about
three million feet Of gas in der last
Ss Say You 1b kHeP psf fgn5
house steak three times a day Will,
How mooch?"
Il vhill take a hundred thousand
dollars and come back again tomor.
row with der wagon to take der rest"
'I belief he goes out. but I dunno.
to. I vhas in my bed up stairs und
my wife und children vhas crying
out dot / vhas dead. Der doctor vhas
ders re- unS d ne fsn:a says ds,d He v,.s ius,
ripe 10; enough m for der idiot asylum una
dat's where I Will send him..
n Rn SEND m Gke to be or s2oa Four una nsh,s
more Mr.. Sprickman calls und he
shakes me by der hand until I vhas
tired Den he let's go und says:
About vhat?"
Why about being up-to-date?"
What you mean"
Why YOU vhas in debt about one
million dollars"
IND I can never pay!''
But you don't haf to. Der idea was
to get in debt as much you can
und to keep piling it up. Dot makes
YOU a business man und up-to date.
You don't worry about your debts. Let
the odder fellow do all the worrying.
iood night brother Hans-sood night
''Und I burn all the gas l can, und
buy all the leather on trust I can
md I vhss a pretty happy old man for