The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1915-01-19


stand what thin ice she was sliding on.
and the reply wa:
Tell your daughters to wait before
/ crtticising me. 1 may think best to get
married some day, but Ill give every girl
in town a chance first
| 1t was query with them whether the
! old maid was in earnest, but she soon
gave proof that she was.
| Number One man, who was engaged to
| Number One girl, had vowed a dozen
times over that nothing but death could
! separate them, was introduced to Miss
Carter in a store and called at her home
\ On the fourth call he informed the old
\ maid that II he was held to his engage
ment he should certainly commit suicide,
| as he had discovered that he and his
| 6ancee were not congenial as to poetry.
| On his next call he boldly proposed
marriage, and was surprised and bewil-
dered when Miss Carter replied: "As you
were born that way 1 suppose I shall
have to overlook it,
Miss Carter got word to girl Number
| One that she had refused an offer Of mar
| rage from the young man Number One,
and after he was given a bad evening
/ he returned to his loyalty. Then came
the query from a dozen people:
What do you suppose is the reason
she didn't accept him?'
| Number Two young man was ready to
step in as Number One stepped out He
admitted his engagement to Number Two
| girl. but doubted IL there would be a
marriage. His fiancee had come out fat
| footed and said she'd be hanged II she'd
/ have a cat around the house after mar
| riage. He being warm-hearted toward
cats, felt that it would be an unwIse
! thing to be Joined in the bonds Of we'd
lock with such girl as that
He loved as he had never loved before.
Should it turn out that he had loved in
vain the dark waters of Lake Erie should
| close over him.
Did Iyou want me for a wife, sister.
aunt or mother?
Heartless womanr'
Run along, sonny. and grow some
more and get older!''
! And he returned to the girl who didn't
love cats. instead OF plunging beneath
| the choppy waters of Lake Erie. And
| the cat girl was actually mad about it
mad at the old maid for refusing him,
and there was contempt in her tones
as she inquired:
! Who does Miss Sarah Carter think
she Is, anyhow
! sewing machine man heard OF Miss
Carter and her money, and said to him
| self: Now here's where I show the
world that a sewing machine man has
a heart. This old maid has been waiting
for years and years for an offer, but
none has come. I will sacrifice myself"
And at his second call to see II she
didn't want to invest so in a machine
that sewed and tucked and ruffied and
| hemmed and gathered, and did almost
everything except the family washing,
he drew a long breath and said: Il have
thought should never marry, but"
! But now you think you WILL" replied
/ 81, a. hi,
| IL do"
Then move right along to the widow
Green's. I believe she wants to get mar
rfed, while I am sure I don't"
And when 1t became known that the
old maid had given the unmarried
| females OF Bloomfield stIn another
chance, instead Of gobbling the man up
| for herself, there wasn't a word Of praise
for her.
She thinks nobody good enough for
her." people said. Think Of the i'm
pudence Of her picking out husbands for
US
And just before the opening of prayer
meeting at the Methodist Church one
evening, as eight or ten people were
gossiping about the old maid, Deacon
Pardon became so excited that he eI-
claimed: BY thunder, but she orter
be arrested and made to give an account
Of herself! I'm telling you that it amt
| natural-nO, II amt natural
| A young druggist who had just started
in business in Bloomfield had won favor
in the eyes Of at least three maidens,
though he had as yet pledged himself to
none His trio Of girls had been very
| bitter toward the old maid, believing
that she would try to catch the druggist.
Miss Carter had been IN the store half
dozen times to mako small purchases,
and Of course. had been treated politely.
when one day the druggist found time to
muse:
shes an old maid, but I don't believe
she's set in her ways. She has reached
the age when she's no longer frivolous,
and she must know considerable about
business"
And. after selling a box Of pills to a
farmer who complained about the pesky
potato bugs. he went on:
There are three or four nice girls
here, but who can tell what sort of wives
they will make?"
And, after selling box OF cough drops
to red-headed woman who observed
that 1t looked like rain, the druggist went
back to his musing.
Yes Miss Carter has got money. and
she must find it a worry to take care OF
it. I'm not a man to marry for money.
but II I had a tidy little sum I should
know how to use 1t to good advantage.
They say that Miss Carter is thirty-eisht
years OlOs "ulAC gill OAAAy N"SiNJ
but love does not take age into account
| That night he called at her home and
said: Miss Carter, am business man
| 'Yes?'
Il am called a rather blunt man"
| Il see"
VIII you marry mer'
mo. sir. won'%
will you tell me why?' he asked
| Because. sir, am picking out hus-
bands for others"
When It was reported that the old
maid had turned down the druggist
that one of the girls might have
chance at him, and indignation meeting
was held in almost every house.
What sort Of a game is it?' was
demanded.
why doesn't she lie and tattle and
start rows the same as other old
maids?"
'I want to tell you that this comes
mighty nigh breaking down the bull
warks of American liberty said
Deacon Pardon.
At length one OF the ministers was
induced to call on the old maid and ask
for an explanatiS=
| Have I been the cause of single
broken engagement" she asked
| "No-o-o."
ION the contrary. haven't brought
about quite a NUMBER
| Yes"
do you know Of a girl in Bloom
field that wants to marry but has no