Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1915-03-14
THE BRIDE

THE BRIDE
EARLY Marriages are favored in Flmvie for rea-
sons connected with the Brides Complexion
The young Bride, moreover, registers better
Brand of Indignation when her Husband turns out
be the Towns Leading Countereiter than who has
had longer experience with Trouble.
Fmvie Society gathers for Wedding with the zest
of Degree Team waiting for the Outer Guard bring
in the Next Candidate. 1t welcomes
all the varieties of Ceremony known
to Civilization, with exception.
This is the Quiet Home Wedding. AS
yet Filmvlle has one, and
would probably not consider it legal
The Bride who tried to content her
self with Denatured Ceremony would -
be condemned by Filmvles Leading ~
Matrons for Frivolous Treatment of II
Serious Subject. ~
Flmvle has little use for Tran ~
quity in any form. When it goes to
Wedding it remembers the Presents
it has Ordered Account, and de- n
mand it's Moneys Worth. Therefore
it prefers Bride Elect whose idea of
Suitable Ceremony is to stand on the
Observation Platform of the Afternoon
Express while the Bridegroom races be-
side it in his Automobile and the Clergy
man megaphones the Fatal Words from the Hurricane
Deck of Barecat Aeropane overhead. When inn
this is desired the Bride suggests that she
and the Clergyman exchange Vehicles.
If this Equipment is not convenient, she chooses the
Coming Tower of Submarine, with the Bridegroom
in Divers costume waving kisses through the Peri
scope and the Clergyman officiating by way of
Wireless Gable. Every Filmvil1e Bride uses an extra
layer of Rouge to conceal her fear that the app
cant for Two Ring Ceremony will have thought up
a Livelier Substitute for Orange Blossoms and Floral
Arch.
If Fate forces her into Prosaic Church Wedding
she conceas small Dirk amid her Lingerie with which
she can gently but firmly nudge the Bridegroom amid
ships should Emergency Methods be needed to entitle
the affair to Place in the Society Columns of the Film
vile Banner.
But dirking New Mown Bridegroom is a last resort
in the Contest for Social Precedence. Usually the
Country Girl whom he knew Summer Before Last
be relied to Breach of Promise Papers in front
of the Procession it moves down the Church Steps
Hand to Hand Clash between the Bride and the
Country Girl thereupon decides which shall be the
Heroine, amply satisfying the Society Editor that the
Occasion is worthy of Mention.
This Pragmatic Incident is reserved for High Noon
Weddings when fifty per cent. of the Days Sunlight
has already been absorbed by the Camera, and the
Bride has her Active Past and Preciptae Future about
evenly divided. The Time of Day is an important item
in determining the nature of Filmvle Wedding Incl
dents.
When the Ceremony takes place in the Film Forenoon
it sign that the Bride has had little experience with
Adventure and that large numbers of Episodes are
coming to her. beginning with the Police discovery that
the Bridegroom has overlooked Previous Engagement
with the Sheriff. The arrest of her Husband the
Church Steps indicates to the Bride that she has Mar
ried in Haste, in which she often Repents; but
at Leisure, this not being Characteristic Film
vile Failing
Her Repentance takes the form of showing the De-
tectives where the evidence is kept tipping her Illus
band out of Several Story Window, slipping a
Poisonous Insect two down his Back. Domestic
duties of this extremely varied for the Bride
who marries in the Forenoon
II the ceremony is postponed till Film Evening, the
Bride is too tired with the Days Adventures to do
much more than referee Shooting Bee among her
Former Admirers, drive her Limousine Jealous