davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-04-01
UNCLE SAM FACING WAR SITUA-
TIONs ON THREE CONTINENTS.

If any casual American thinks time
has opportunity to hang heavily on the
hands Of the President Of the United
States these days, 1t is necessary simply
to recall the fact that he Is forced to
guard American interests on no less than
three continents and maintain our pres
tige, while at the same time seeking to
carry out the peace policies demanded
by the great mass Of the people of the
United States.
Ordinarily either the handling of the
Mexican situation, the maintenance of
our "open door, policy in China despite
American interests in the face of the
aggressive attitude Of the European bel
ligerents, would be sufficient in and of
itself for our government to deal with,
but with all three OF these and the duty
of protecting the lives of Americans in
Turkey in addition. President Wilson is
indeed burdened to-day as was never a
President OF the United States before by
complicated foreign relations
If our chief magistrate had these prob
lens simply to attend to, the situation
ditons now prevailing. AS a matter OF
fact, the President must even sleep with
one eye open toward public opinion. and
he mus even try to appear to think
what tho people think he thinks. Pos
sb;y tho very multiplicity of our foreign
problems affords our executive a certain
degree of relief from public pressure in
any particular direction.
About the time some hot-headed Ameri-
can like Gardner of Massachusetts, is
ready to fight over a Mexican outrage
and summon the American eagle to arms,
along comes a German cruiser and sinks
an American freighter sailing incog.
Just as the American fleet that Gardner
wanted sent to the Fatherland to demand
reparation Is about to start the Japanese
government slams our open door IN
China tight shut, and the fleet Gets out
to cross the lsthmus via the canal. Even
before the Culebra cut has had oppor-
tunity to cut off the feet with another
slide. John Bun perpetrates another out
rage against American shipping. Willie
holding tight all the American ships no
has IN limbo, and the feet is ordered
back In Gardeners Imagination. having
had a splendid practice cruise.
BY that time the idea Of fighting all
80" Cyssible enemies at one and the
same time has become an international
joke. Uncle Sans sense Of humor again
becomes his saving grace. and the
american people as a whole are ready TO
Jay to President Wilson: go ahead
md do the best you can. We will all
stand by you I'm your unparalleled tank
OF keeping onr craft steady while all tho
rest Of tho world - trying to Rock our
boat,
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-04-01
COULDN'T BE DONE.

They were speaking Of how some people
love to bask In the sunshine OF great
ness the other evening when Congress-
man Harvey b. ferguson OF New Mexico
recalled this incident.
Some time ago a dinner was given by
the members Of a bar association in a
Western state. and lawyer who was ex.
ceedingly young wished to be placed next
TO n DISTINGUISHED Judge.
waiter said he. putting a dollar in
the hand OF the head one. as he entered
the banquet hall. will you do me a very
great favor"
why. yes" beamed the head waiter
glancing first at the dollar and then a,
the donor what do you want me tc
do?"
II am q great friend Of Judge Smith, -
returned the young lawyer. and wan,
you to place me next to him.
Cant be DONE" was the startling re.
joinder Of the other. The judge just
gave ME dollar to put you down here.
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-04-01
FISHING INTERESTS.
N'rom the Bennington Banner.


Fishermen are now to be taxed fifty
cents year. This is the price of the
republican extravagant expenditure OF
the public money.-Burlingto Clipper.
The Clipper looks at the issue from a
partisan point Of view. The fact is that
the republican controlled Legislature
has been so paisimon!ous. and the state
of Vermont such a tightwad in dealing
with the fish and game department that
at last the fishermen and hunters have
been driven to insist on imposing a spe-
cial tax on themselves, in the form Of
license. in order to maintain the finest
and most enduring outdoor recreation
on the face of the earth. And they are
glad to pay for it. So far az we have
observed most of the tears being shed
over the matter are splashing from eyes
which wouldn't recognize the difference
between a bullfrog and a bul-pout. The
deep feeling Of these kndhearted gentle
men whose fishing experience has been
gained in carrying home a pound OF had
dock from the fish market every Friday
morning is indeed pathetic
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-04-01
HIS CHOICE.

\ street corner orator was addressing
an audience which consisted mainly OF
small boys.
His subject was kindness to animals.
and he urged his listeners to treat our
dumb friends with humanity. Just as ne
reached the end of his harangue a lady
walked past leading two little dogs on a
double backbone white and the other
black.
The speaker seized his opportunity.
Now, suppose these two dear little an
imals began lighting" he said, loudly;
after hearing what | have said. what la
the first thing you would do?"
A paralyzed silence fell over the crwd
very small boy in the front row eyed
the two dogs critically.
well, guv'nor." he said at last II
fink I'd have tuppence on the black one!"
Answers.
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-04-01

price Of butter as 1t passes from pro-
Queer to consumer. Data as to cream
cries were obtained from 10 representa-
tive establishments In the famous Elgin
district and In northwestern Missouri.
and prices and margins Of wholesalers
and retailers were obtained covering
various lots Of tub and print butter
bought from the 10 creamerics mention
ed. and handled In the large markets of
Chicago. Cincinnati. Cleveland, Philadel-
phia and Pittsburgh. June, as repre-
senting the season of high production
and low prices. and December the sea.
son Of low production and high prices
were the months selected. and data were
secured for these months for the follow
in representative years: 1904, when but
ter prices were the lowest shown for any
year since 1901 1910. when there was a
wide range Of prices and the average
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-04-01
MAKING IT EMPHATIC

She sailed into the telegraph office ar
raped on the counter. AS the clerk can
forward to meet her he remembered thi
she had been there about ten minut
before He wondered what she wantc
this time.
oh" she said. "let me have that tel
gram ] wrote Just now; forgot som
thing very important. | wanted to unde
score perfectly lovely In acknowledge
the receipt Of that bracelet. VIII It co
anything extra
''No, ma am said the clerk. a. he han
ed her the message.
The young lady drew two heavy lln
beneath the words. and said
ITS awfully good Of you to let me
that. 1t will please Arthur ever so much
The Youths Companion.
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-04-01

was comparatively high: 1911, when
prices fell somewhat as compared with
1910.
The primary constituent of butter 10
butter fat, which briefly defined is the
pure oil contained in milk, cream, or but
ter. The farmer who supplies milk or
cream to the creamery Is paid on the
basis OF the amount Of butter fat con-
tained therein The difference between
the price paid the farmer by the cream
cry for the butter fat in ore pound or
butter and the price paid by the con-
sumner for one pound Of butter repre-
sents the total margin from producer to
consumer
In the periods covered by the report
the average prices received by farmers
and raid by consumers, the margins be-
tween those prices and the per cent.
that tho margin in each case was Of the
retail price were as follows:
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-04-01

If the greatest thing In the world is
charity. then the European war is doing
a tremendous work for the American ma
ton. appealing to our sympathies, hu-
manifest those grand qualities which
are causing Europe to hail us as the
worlds benefactors We can realize as
never before that 1t Is more blessed to
give to sufferers by war than to re-
ceive as sufferers by war.
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-04-01

The WEEKLY FREE PRESS. cents
rcr copy. 80 cents for six months. Noo
per year. postage paid.
Advertisements and subscriptions re-
cclved 1T the office. $50 College !treet.
Full advertising rates sent on applica-
aor.
Accounts cannot be opened for subscr1p-
lions. Subscribers will please remit with
order. Names are not entered until pay
ment IS received. and all papers are stop
ped at the end Of the time paid for.
Remittance at the risk Of the subscriber
unless made by registered letter. or by
check or postal order payable to the pub
fishers
The date when the subscription expires
Is on the address-label OF each paper.
the chance Of which 20 a subsequent
date becomes 4 receipt for remittance.
No other receipt Is sent unless requested.
The receipt Of the paper Is sufficient
recent for the first subscription.
When a change Of address Is desired.
both the old and new addresses should
be given
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-04-01
THE STORY TELLER.
NO COLLEGIA\.

The late Admiral Mahan once said
IT is hard to discuss naval matter.
with the average man, for the average
man Is so ignorant OF these matters tina,
ne evokes mistakenly the figure of Exc.
Exc, seated in a restaurant before q
lettuce salad, said to his waiter impa.
tently:
Hurry up that ere chandelier
IT amt a chandelier what you're all
ludin to- the waiter answered. smiling
It's a cruet
Well, never mind what she Isl said
Exc. Hurry her up. We amt all beet
at college
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-04-01

Prominent Belgians are discussing pro-
posals not to rebuild the ruined cities Of
Malnes Termonde. Louvain and Llege
after the war. but to erect new towns
on sites near by. II is thought that tour
lists would be attracted in great num-
bers to the ruins and will provide much
Of the capital necessary for building the
new places.
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-04-01
NO SLJGG.ARD.

Having been badgered by a canvass
old Simpkins ordered a ton of Smit
Sudden Slug Exterminator, though VIII
the canvasser had departed Slmpk
kicked himself for the rest Of the aft
noon.
Judge then of his JOY when. a few id
later, an angry person marched in a
ordered precisely ton of the stuff.
But sir said Simpkins. who was I'd
ly honest as men go. "a ton is enough
destroy all the slugs In this country"
Yes, I know" replied the customer
ergeticaly. land they're all in my q
den"'-Answers
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-04-01
PRICES OF BUTTER.
Relation Between Butter Fat and

Relafion Between Butter Fat and
Prices from Producer to Consumer.
Butter prices from producer 70 con-
sumer" is the subject Of report recent.
ly Issued as Bulletin No. 1s4 by the
states department of labor. This report
relates to creamery butter only and the
prices considered are those for butter
passing promptly from producer to con.
sumner, no cold storage prices being In
cluded.
The object Of the report IL to show the
relation between the price OF the raw
material (butter faO and the retail price
Of butter in periods Of comparatively low
and high prices, and the cost of distri-
button or the additions made to the
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-04-01
AN ADVERTISING BIRD.

] am the first spring robin,
A bird most highly priced.
l frost my nose.
! freeze my toes.
But l am advertised.
OF course there's nothing to It.
] am Joke passe.
I'm never here
A single year
AS early as they say.
But ! can putIt over.
Like lots OF human guys.
m Just a bluff.
But that's enough.
1t pays to advertise.
brooklyn Eagla.
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-04-01

Villa has planted his cannon uncom-
fortably near the American boundary at
Matamoras, lust opposite from Browns
vile II few of his shells should fall
among Americans. we would want to
know whether any Of them had Uncle
Sam blown in the bottle.
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-04-01

When You want anything, advertise
in the new special column of this
paper Some bargains are offered
there this week which IL Will pay you
to read about. See page two This
every week and one cent q word will
reach them al.
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-04-01

Jacob II. Schlff believes that the war
will end in the autumn not because OF
an exhaustion OF belligerents' credit, but
through the recognition Of both sides that
no advantages are being gained and that
the coming Of winter will only intensity
suffering.
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-04-01

The Boston Globe thinks "the eugenic
marriage act which has passed the Yer
mont Legislature may be a good thing
financially for the New Hampshire par
sons" The Granite State will hardly en-
Joy being Gretna Green for the class
of marriages this act bars.
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-04-01
ACCURACY PROVED.

Il always call a spade n spade, "
the emphatic man.
That's right" replied Broncho
"A fourhusher once lost his life ir
son Gulch by calm a spade a cll
wa shington star
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-04-01
OUR KALEIDOSCOPE.
MEMS WANTS.

Man wants but little here below
An adage we have met.
But still we have not found it 80.
For nearly all the men we know
Want all that they can set.
Man wants but little here below
Yet adds unto his store.
He loves 70 see his fortune grow;
1t doesn't matter how much dough
He has. he longs for more.
boston RecOl
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-04-01

The Brattleboro Reformer thinks the
Street primary bill as so badly singed
Is best friends don't recognize it." The
direct primary may not he alone in tho
recognition.
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-04-01
HE WAS PRACTICING.

Johnny was sea ted at the piano read
ing.
His Mother 0rom the kitchen)-Johnny
why aren't you practicing?
Johnny-I am, ma.
His Mother-I don't hear anything.
Johnny-Well. I'm practicing thu
pauses.--Boston Transcript.
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-04-01
HER BUSINESS.

at Is no use trying to steal a march
on that pretty girl at the glove coun-
ter"
why not?"
"she has way Of making every one
show ones hand,"-Baltimore American
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-04-01
PLENTY OE MODELS.

"Shoe clerks really ought to be mo
of propriety."
why so?"
because they have numerous oII
tunities every day to observe wha
fitting "-Richmond Times Dispatch.
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-04-01
WOULD HAVE TO.

Does your wife always think
before she speaks once as she res
to do"
Gracious. no-she can't think in
hand FLORIDA Times-Union.
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-04-01

In December (the month Of low pro-
ductiom the prices were considerably
higher than those in June the month of
high production), especially in the years
1901 and 1911. When figures for the three
years are combined the increase in De-
cember as compared with June amounts
to &.4 per cent for prices received by
farmers and 2s.5 per cent for those paid
by consumers. In the two months Of 1904
when prices were low the total margin
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-04-01
A NEUTRAL SHAVE.

Gimme neutral shave" said a man.
as he hurried into the barber shop.
What In tophet Is neutral shavs"'
asked the ba rber.
"A shave with the war talk out OF It. +"
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-04-01

represented a much higher proportion OF
the retail price than In the correspond
ing months Of 1910 and 1911. when prices
were higher.
Tho total margin between producer
and consumer is made up Of the cream
cry margin. freight and carriage. whole
saler's margin. and retailers margin. In
the periods considered the average
creamery margins per pound varied from
a minimum Of 24 cents in June, 1910, to
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-04-01

cat that disturbed his slumber. Wall in
sists he'll not pay the fine.
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-04-01

Vermonts legislators do not know lust
when they will reach the end, but they
are on the way.
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-04-01

tcrus---Si.0O u Year. In Advance.
DAILY by mail $500 year In advance.
RATE IN CANADA.
DAILY ....... 1900 n year in advance.
WEEKLY .... S2.Ov =. ear in advance.
FREE PRESS ASSOCIATION,
.'uhlishcrs. huntington, VI.
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-04-01
JUST so

'Hurrah, They have given ME a
Ing part"
And what part do YOU play?'
Il play the part Of a boothlack.
Good enough. At last. my frleI
have chance to shine. 10
Courier-Journal.
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-04-01

maximum of 1893 cents in December,
1904; freight and carriage averaged tho
game about three-fourths OF a cent per
pound; the average wholesalers margin
varied from a minimum of Ia cents in
June. 1904, to a maximum Of 1G cents
per pound In December, 1911; the aver
age retailers margin varied from a.
minimum OF 80 cents per pound In De-
cember, 1904, to maximum Of sos cents|
per pound in December, 1910
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-04-01
THE REASON.

Billion (sternly)-Whats the reason that
young man stays 80 late when he calls?
Miss Bilton (demurely)-I am. papa
JudGA
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-04-01
THEM FINE ARTS,

Does your daughter play Mozart
asked, displaying unusual erudition
II believe So" she replied depreci
ly, "but think she prefers aucti
Philadelphia Ledger,
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-04-01

The answer to the question OF how
much will 1t costT' will nearly always be
found in the ads"
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-04-01
MORE SIMPLE COURT PROCEDURE

MORE SIMPLE COURT PROCEDURE.
From the Enosburg standard)
| a special commission consisting OF Jus
tce G. NJ. Powers. Judge Frank L..
Fish and Federal Judge Harland B.
| Howe, have submitted recommends
tons for simplincation of court proce-
dure the crying need for which has long
been recognized.
I The recommendations made by these
gentlemen. lawyers of ability and high
repute, are not revolutionary. and in
fact will strike the average layman as
moderate. considering the acknowledged
evil of the present system.
The recommendations call for a plain
statement of the claims Of the plain
| tiff and defendant in a suit the right to
! change case from a court OF law to a
, court of equity and vice versa, without
losing what has already been done in Il
! trial, and a restriction OF the grounds
upon which the Supreme court can re-
| verse decisions of the lower court and
order retrials.
! And yet these very reasonable and
common sense propositions, promising a
saving In time and money to litlgants.
are opposed by members of the legal
| fraternity OF the precedent encumbered
| variety. The reason given for their OPP
position Is the pucrile one that the step
| is too drastic a one to be taken hur-
! ricdly.
| liuriiedly! Think of it. After years
| Of discussion, after volumes Of argu-
ment denouncing our archaic methods OF
| judicial procedure, to which there has
been no effective reply we are told that
! the first feeble steps tOws~d reform
must not be taken in a hurry.
| No, hurry would mean speedler JUS.
! tice and speedier justice would mean
fewer fees. On the same principle ply
sicians favor prolonging the illness OF
their patients In order to increase their
medical fees
This kind of opposition to reform
should not be permitted to longer pre-
vent Vermont from adopting measures
along the lines suggested by Judges
Powers. Fish and Howe. which will cut
away the red tape and technical OBJ
| structions to justice and insure the set
tlement of cases upon their merits.
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-04-01

A huge boulder crashed down the side
of Hawks Nest. n j., and Just missed a
touring car full Of people.
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-04-01
IN THE GOOD OLD DAY

When the sulphur's in the treacls
And the YARDS" are sleeping /
And the land looks fit for plowir
In the old south hillside lot;
And the pussies on the willows
Fairly purr as YOU go by,
Then's the time that Ma gins
SOAP and Gee. 1t smells on hig|
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-04-01
HE EXPLAINED IT.

Wife-John. l saw in the paper
nautical mile is nearly a seventh
der?
Husband-Well-er-you know, m
that things swell In the water
Transcript.
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-04-01
HARDLY A MATTER OF c

TfNfNI7IT Y MN 7 TsIN UT Z II
Il am sorry, but | advertised
Scandinavian cook" said Mrs. VIII
Iawd sake" replied Paralysia
Waddles. What diffunce do it
what a ladys 'ligion am. dess so
kin cook ?"-Judge.
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-04-01

John d. Rockefeller has spent 500 900 in
making a lake on the Buttermilk Hill
section of his Pocantico Hill estate.
Twice within the last six months the bowl
has been filled and both times the water
has disappeared over night
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-04-01
WANTED.

BIZ ELLINGTON, THURSDAY, APRIL
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-04-01
WHAT OUR NE|GHBORs SAY
LEGISLATIVE TIME, LIMITS.
(From the Enoshurg Standard)

The Legislature at Montpelier has
found Its pace, and judging from the
speed with which bills were ground out
yesterday 1t will be able to adjourn In
March-if that seems best. "-Burlington
Free Press.
How delightful and reassuring. Writ
ten March %, over two and one-half
months after converting. to be Informed
that the Legislature has found its pace
In the meantime the Legislature OF
Missouri. where 10 day time limit pre-
walls. has adjourned. But then Missouri
has a population only ten times, and an
appraised valuation only forty times.
that of Vermont.
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-04-01
NEWS TOLD IN BRIEF.

American commission for relief in Bel
GUM completed negotiations for feeding
100000 civilians behind German lines.
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-04-01

While trying to save her sx-year-
sister. Edith Woods. 4. of Winsted. Conn.
falls into water and both are drowned.
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-04-01

State wide prohibition is defeated by
Minnesota Legislature
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-04-01

Mary GunoS. six. OF New York. asked
her teacher to excuse her for being tardy
She was delayed in reaching school by
saving her three-year-old sister and Is
months-old brother from suffocation In
a fire.
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-04-01

j. II. Andrews. president OF Hyde Wind
lass Co.. Of Bath. Me, is found dead in
n New York hotel.
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-04-01

Sixty days In jail or a fnc faces William
Wall of Trenton, N. j., because he shot
Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1915-04-01

Miss Winifred Ives. daughter OF Gen.
Brayton Ives cut of by his will. begins
contest TO have II set aside.