Judsonia weekly advance., 1915-11-24
GETTING A START NATHANIEL C. FOWLER, Jr.
1Copyright 1s by the Mcclure Newspaper syndicate3
COM RADESHIP.

Friendship does not, and cannot, exist without a community of inter- est.
 | We select our friends, our real friends, because they think as we do, like the things which we like, and are interested in what interests us.
 Likes do not repel, and unlkes do not attract, in every case by any manner of means, notwithstanding the old and somewhat accepted adage to that effect.
 Friends may differ in detail, but never are fundamentally apart in either thought or action. They are comrades They love to be together, to work toge her, to play together. Neither tires of the other. They have common interest and occupy a mu- tual ground.
 Ninety per cent of unhappy and un. profitable marriages are due to the fact that they are born of sentiment and the imitation of love, instead of being founded upon comradeship.
 Sentiment is not safe. 1t has led more people astray, and been respon- sible for more trouble, than any other one element in the composition of human affairs.
 N is difficult for one to know wheth CT or not certain person is suitable for him to marry, if he depends upon sentimental feeling or allows blind love to guide him. If. on the other hand, both parties are good comrades, liking the same things, having a strong mutual interest; and, if they are contented when together, irrespec- tive of the affectionate side of court ship, it is pretty safe for them to marry, even though they may not have what is commonly called love for each other
 In order that I may not be mis- understood, let me say that love, if it is pure, is an absolutely safe guide to follow; but, as comparatively few of us can separate love from danger ous sentiment we are not likely to know whether we are under the in- fuence of the genuine article. 1t is, therefore, safer to depend upon that which is surer, namely, com radeship, for if genuine, it will breed and develop love; but sentiment, if not based wholly on true love, does not necessarily carry comradeship or give or hold a community of interest.
 No man should marry a woman un- less he feels perfectly happy with her before marriage under all conditions and circumstances; unless he loves her at play, ct work, at home, and away; unless he is completely con- tented when in her company, with no desire to be away from her or to have any interest which he does not want her to share with him.
 If he can be happier at his club, among his man friends, than he would be indoors or out of doors with his intended wife, there is something the matter with him, or with her, or with both of them.
 I do not mean to say that man should be unhappy or discontented when temporarily away from his fiancee or his wife; but, unless before marriage he is happier and more con- tented with the woman than without her, and he is willing to make her a partner in everything, there is lacking that comradeship, that community of interest, which is sure to kill all the love there may be between them, and result in disaster.
 If men would select their mates as they choose their intimate friends, and use the same judgment in so doing. and if women would do likewise, the percentage of unhappy marriages would be reduced t0 0the minimum.