The Birmingham age-herald., 1915-05-09

Did you ever have a quarrel with your wife? Let us hope not. And if you haven't, you had better not waste your time reading this. In the first place. 1t won't interest you. and in the second place. I am not sure tbat you ought to be introduced into the troubles of the domestic circle. It is probably life that is much better than yours, and 1t seems hardly fair to parade a list of troubles
 before the uninititaed when il is not DOS sihle at the same time to give fair presentation of the other side of the case. So ycu. my married friends. I will ad- dress myself to you. And it won't do any harm for the wives to read what I | have to say, although will open the sub ject by renewing my question to the men. .'pio you ever have quarrel with your wife?"
 Occasionally. there will be found man. who, with true grief at heart. will sadly admit, "I am afraid 1 have Now let me suggest at the outset that people sometimes take their quarrels and other domestic infelicities too seriously to heart. By this I mean they grleve and worry over trouble that could be easily straight ened out and forgotten if only there was a wholesale sense of humor 10 enable one to perceive how ridiculous to prtend to have had a quarrel at all over a mat ter of such trifling moment. A great many of our woes are really imaginary and possibly not the least of our delusions, the soulgnawing torture of believing that We cannot possibly get along happily in our own domestic circle. It often does a man good to recognize the fact that he
 has been somewhat of a fool rather than a grievous sinner, and have a good laugh
 over the foolish figure he has cut and the antics he has committed, with the
 resolution that next time he will laugh in adyance and not act in so ridiculous d
 manner again. But do not think for a
 moment that I wish to imply that do-
 nestle quarrels ae always trifles. Quite
 the contrary-and on the other hand let
 me say that the peace and contentment of
 a truly happy home is the nearest ap-
 proach to heaven witnessed O nthis earth, and consequently it follows that whatso-
 ever mars that sweet vision of true happ- ness is a matter to be treated with a
 great deal of respect.
 You may possibly have heard of the
 man who late in life was forced by
 illnesc to put aside for season his
 busy cares and really get acquainted
 with the member of his own family. Lit-
 tie by little various things impressed
 him which he had never thought of be-
 fore. And finally one day in the pres
 ence of his wife and grown-up children,
 he asked these questions: "ls 1t really true that all these years you have been
 keeping things from me. afraid to men tion this or that topic in my presence,
 because you were certain I would not understand but would fly into passion and say disagreeable things? l believe have passed among my neighbors as a
 fairly good sort of father, and l certainly have considered myself to be above ap- proach, but now it seems to be dawnng
 upon me that I don't really know my
 family at all. Have you honestly been afraid of me all these years and never ventured to speak of things that were nearest your heart because you knew that l always came home tired or excited or depressed by business cares and was likely to roughly rebuke any one who veDtured to distract me with subjects that had not introduced myself?" It was d very much bashed and nervous group of people who had to admit, ever so reluc- tantly that it was true that they had al ways studied to keep themselves so per feetly in hand when their father re- turned to his home at night. that noth- Ing SnOulQ cross pr Stliiiuldtt outbdi s- os excited and unsympathetic. if not ill- natured. remarks. We are told that the man just turned his face sadly to the wall. and with a. great sigh of pain. groaned, "Then my life has all been n failure and a mistake" and presently breathed his last.
 This is doubtless an unusual picture But while 1 am willing to admit that fact, I am not so sure that is not one of the most pitiful evils of this time that heads of families take far too little pains to enter into the living interests of the wife and children at home.
 Sometimes the father will plan for him. self an evening when all outside cares being dismissed, he win enjoy himself without interruption in the busom of his family He will look forward to 1t, and count upon 1t, and come home bent upon having the happiest kind of time. Perhaps for weeks and months he has been too preoccupied with business cares or outside engagements to spend With his wife and family even a few minutes around the evening lamp. But he has foreotten this in the pleasure he has in store. His wife. too, is looking forward tc the evening. There are cares and trou- bles which she has borne alone for many long weeks. watching the husbands face with scrutinizing care each evening to see if she might venture to intrude her little troubles into his great sea of care;