davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The broad ax. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1895-19??, 1915-05-15

what puzzles me-" said a well
dressed man to a police captain to
whom he had complained that roll Of
bills had been taken from his trousers
pocket In a subway car, ''is how the
thief got the money, since never felt
his hand in my pocket"
To which the official replied: "Let me
explain. As soon as the thief had COM
pleted his preliminary work to satisfy
himself that you had some money in
your pocket he set to work to get it out
But he didn't put his hand in your
pocket. This is what he did. He took
hold OF the lining of your pocket with
his thumb and index finger, and when
the car Iurched or jolted he pulled the
lining up a little more until finally the
edge OF the bill came in sight. As soon
as enough of the bill had appeared to
enable him to get grip on it he care
fully plucked it out OF your pocket. and
yoI never knew the difference. 1t ap-
pears simple, but it requires consider
able skilL"-New York Sun.
The broad ax. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1895-19??, 1915-05-15
The Baahful Lover.

The girl who has a bashful sutton
should cease lamenting the inconven-
fences OF the situation and thank Prov
idence for him. He will be very, very
faithful. No need for heartburnings, no
cause for Jealousies, will arise in this
connection For not only have the 9TH
er girls no time for him "a fact which,
taken alone, is hardly a recommended
ton to the average woman, by the
way, but he himself-oh. joy OF joys!
will have no time for the other girls
And 50 the maiden who has a very
bashful lover should cease repining.
Once she has secured that eminently
suitable person, it is up to her to train
him and educate him in the way, he
should 60. And there is no fear that he
VIII ever depart from her.-Ellen Adair
In Philadelphia Ledger.
The broad ax. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1895-19??, 1915-05-15
kicked Into Literature

Son OF an adventurous naval captain,
Rolf BoldrewOod. or. TO give him his
real name, Thomas Alexander Browne,
the author. had one Of the most TO
mantle careers I'm the annals OF Htera-
ture. Pioneer squatter in early life In
Victoria. he made such good use OF
his opportunities that while still In the
twenties his check was good for a
quarter OF u million. Then. II unfortu-
nately for himself. luckily for novel
readers. a long drought killed or his
hocks and herds and compelled him to
enter the government service as a sti-
pendiary magistrate. Shortly after
this he happened to be kicked by
horse. This led to his being laid up.
and to while away the tedious hours
be wrote an Australian sketch called
The kangaroo Rush" He sent It TO
the Cornhill. which accepted It, and 50,
as he used to say merrily, he was
kicked into literature. "-London Opin-
ion.
The broad ax. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1895-19??, 1915-05-15

eohemians.

The term Bohemian applied 70
those who lead a certain style OF Life,
originated in France. where il was first
applied to the gypsies, who were erro-
neOusly supposed TO be natives OF Bo-
hernia. At some time early In the nine
teenth century the name came to be
applied TO persons OF unsettled habits
who did not observe the conventional
rules Of society. Bohemia" the haunt
Of artists and students with little mon
ey, was in the Latin quarter OF Paris
and 1ourished, especially in the period
Of 1880. The classical description Of II
is contained in Henri Murger's Scenes
Of the Life of Bohemia" which is pub
hshed In several TRANSACTIONS. Puccini's
opera, Ia BOheme," is founded on this
famous book As James Anthony
Froude explains, the term Bohemian
is not necessarily uncomplimentary.
Speaking of Bohemians, he says, Il
mean merely a class Of persons who
prefer adventure and speculation 10
settled industry and who do not work
well In the harness OF ordinary life
Philadelphia Press.
The broad ax. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1895-19??, 1915-05-15
Sarefooted 81.

slams Present uIili,S 1'srS,
date dates from 1892 and is t5. o "a.
TWO years study of n, 'ue outcome J,
b 5ary ORGANIZATIONS of Eu, ra,i0us NIL
bodies the militia system u'oIe. It en-.
OF universal service Ill., With ta,5
Every citizen is ijabI,
two years in Tho line arl % Serve "a,
years in the first AMI ten I re1. for IL.
seIond reserve, but cnJy 'eafS IN tie
s sn.l&d up as are required to to E many a,
peace footing Thnxa ~, ulea On ,
called W. receive as comna .,' aie thu,
tain attachments If favsI '.sauon Oef.
tho those liable To- serve pass s,rD n rs, .;
tne reserve which i, called o alsa !. NO
tain intervals for rro,, eS u Out ateef.
days training. ''e" 10 Szc
Besides his arms ard bt.
siameSe soldier receives ! ti c,J,ues. he
equals about - cents, q month ',s "a teaI
% satungS (about ) Gems. -, OeSids
OF which latter sum, however ei /, IA. aat
ped to pay for the single m 80 : SOP
that the state provides" TI !, u he
has to buy his own footpsor - ,' soldle'
rest OF his food. No wonder tba anu ro,i 'a'
ity Of the army gees barefo .,te 1ial l1
the Lands Of the sun" '''eu--lH
The broad ax. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1895-19??, 1915-05-15
The Bulbs Went Astr,v

The growth Of bulbs is an impOrgr,
industry to Holland. as from Haarlsu
the markets of the world obtain tber
supply.
1t is told of said Pasha. who had
great love for flowers, that he placsl
an order in Holland for q choice assOr.
ment Of these bulbs, for which be paid
5000. When the bulbs arrived Bis
secretary Of the INTERIOR" who n
ceived them. not knowing Of the bulb
order. sidetracked them 10 the kitchen
Soon after their arrival the pasha was
to give an important banquet. and bis
chief cook. wishing TO serve an especial
treat, grilled the new variety Of onions
and served them hot Evidently as Al
article Of food they did not prove
success since the only comment them
corder OF the incident made Of tie n
suit was that pasha's interest in n.
dening received Il severe body blow
National Geographic Magazine.
The broad ax. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1895-19??, 1915-05-15
Gold Plated Doorknobs.

In some Of the $4,000 a year fats n
Fifth avenue. New York, the hardEle
Is gold plated. Hinges, window brack
cts, fixtures. door handles, key pLats'
are all treated with gold before beng
placed in position. All that is required
to keep gold in fine condition is hgnI
rubbing with a piece Of dry leaLnei
No polish is necessary, and the WOOD
work near this yellow hardware
never furnished. Silver plating on VINE
metal is used on the trim in the dlnms
room. Nine coats Of paint are Spreau
on the walls Of the dining rooms
these magnificent flats. the same eafs
being used as with the paneling OF
mOtorcar. The walls. instead OF oels
highly glazed. have a soft, silky nnsA
Pittsburgh Press.
The broad ax. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1895-19??, 1915-05-15
The March 20 Maona.

The great caravan which every year
sets out from Cairo for Mecca has a
conductor on a camel leading the way.
Day and night. whatever the weather
Is, he remains without any covering,
naked to the waist With him march
men with large torches, which are kept
alight during the night and illuminate
the column OF smoke above them, so
that it appears n pillar Of fire. During
the day. when the head Of the caravan
is difficult TO see on account Of inter
vening hills and mounds Of sand, the
torches are kept burning. so that In
stead of the light which served during
the night a column OF smoke indicates
to the struggling caravan from afar the
direction Of the march and the time
and place Of a halt
The broad ax. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1895-19??, 1915-05-15
A Priceless Idol.

1t is a part OF the creed Of Moham-
medans to smash the noses OF all idols
they may come across When they In
vaded India they defaced In this way
every Hindu god. A figure Of Vishnu
cut in green jade was buried In the
bed Of the Gauges during this invasion
and Is now preserved In q temple In
Benares. 1t Is the only perfect image
left Of all the old idols, and its sanctity
Is such that the priests at Alahabad
have offered for It its weight In. gold,
together with two magnificent rubies,
formerly the eyes OF Buddha. But they
cannot buy Il.
The broad ax. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1895-19??, 1915-05-15
A Pair Of Eminent Grave piaasrs.

The profession have a saying that
parts make actors. When the $4,000
benefit to Lester Wallack was given in
New York, with one Of the historic
Hamlet" casts Of the century, the
public, Of course, expected to see aper-
Torrance that could never be forgot
ten because Of its all round greatness.
There was disappointment for the ex-
pectant innocents- All star casts want
proportion. and this particular perform
ance of the sublime tragedy was
queer"
For example, Joseph Jefferson and
william ]. Florence played the grave
diggers, and In their dressing room aft
er HoratiO's there crack'd a noble
heart" Mr.. Jefferson said to his COM
panion:
BILLY, whose lines were you speak
ing, anyway
~Bacon's, 1 guess" Florence replied.
Perhaps" unused gentle Joe. Il
knew they weren't Shakespeare's"-
Detroit Free Press.
The broad ax. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1895-19??, 1915-05-15
Spinnino a Web.

A patient Englishman, who last sum-
mer watched a garden spider spin its
nest from start to finish, has told what
he saw In knowledge. At half past
o'clock I'm the evening the spider, a
half grown female, began work by
dropping from one branch OF a pine
tree TO another below and there max
ing fast line. which eventually form
ed two Of the perpendicular radiating
lines Of the web. From that time II
continued TO work without Interrupt
ton until twenty-five minutes after ]
the next morning. The network and
the radial lines were done by half past
II, and the spiral part OF the web was
consequently made In less than an
hour. He says the finished web was
one Of the most perfect he has ever
seen.
The broad ax. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1895-19??, 1915-05-15
sabyIonians Feared Ghosts.

In a lecture on Burial Customs In
Mesopotamia and Egypt" DR.. l. W.
King. F. s. A, said the spirit which
animated the Egyptians in their varied
and changing practices toward the dead
was based on affection and reverence,
but the Babylonian, in the main, was
prompted by fear. The BabylOnians
were probably more spook ridden than
any other nation OF antiquity, and their
magical texts made it clear that the
most terrible class OF spirits were the
ghosts Of the dead, who for some rea-
son had been unable to enter the IN
derworld. Driven by hunger and thirst,
such a ghost might roam about and
fasten on any one with whom 1t had
had relations in this life. and It would
plague him until he performed the
rites that could give IT peace. 1t was
mainly TO lay the ghost ana prevent IT
from haunting" that the Babylonians
were scrupulous in performing the due
burial rites.-LOndon Times.
The broad ax. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1895-19??, 1915-05-15

What l wish first to insist upon is
the essential worth. nobility, primary
indeed. OF the liberal pursuit OF poll
tics. 1t is simply the highest. the
most dignihed, the most important
OF all earthly objects Of human study.
Next TO the relations of man with his
maker there is nothing so deserving his
best attention as his relation to his fel-
low men. The welfare Of the COM
munity is always more important than
the welfare Of any individual or num-
Der OF individuals, and the welfare OF
the community is the highest object Of
the study Of pOlitics.-Whitelaw Reid.
The broad ax. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1895-19??, 1915-05-15


Alexander Hamilton was dsfaa.n, lat
his attempt 10 give the presidant 80 J, !. .
United States the power to apno;D. i. !. "
governors Of the states. In t Sras, ue
American countries his ideal 10 r s--
ally realized. s'uel'
The president of Colombi, .nDo...
the governor Of each Department ' -
the governor appoints the prefer, -,
mayors. The president OF Psrn -
points the projects, these the snbr,.
fects, and the latter name the -,I.. -
nors. Reports flow up this Official ,,,,.
case. and orders flow down. So tb,, =.
whole administration dances n Tt-.,'
piping.
In Chile there is a completa sb,,,
from president through intepdant g,-
ernOr and SubdeIegate to iDsDASt,,
There are municipal councils for M,
but nowhere is there a place 70, a,
county. as we know it. electing isw
judge and Sherif-EdV,5
.AlswOrth Ross in Century Magszina
The broad ax. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1895-19??, 1915-05-15
And That's the Reason.

Don't you want your nice bread and
butter, Amer asked her father. Anne
shook her head. Its a shame to
waste such nice bread and butter"
continued her father. I'm eat 1t my
self" Anne watched the process with
big eyes and look Of expectancy on
her face.
Finally, when the last mouthful had
disappeared. Anne asked, papa, did It
ticker
''Tiekler' said her father. why, no.
What do you meanT'
Il thought it would tickle" said
Anne at had long hair on tide
bneator.
The broad ax. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1895-19??, 1915-05-15

Ernest was very big and very black,
and when it came to sleeping and eat
ing fully justified his name. Ernest did
not fancy steady work, but he was apt
TO be available when spring came for
odd jobs at a dollar day and his din
ner.
One spring he came in with a sheep
ish grin.
Miss Sally, been hearin' in de lodge
meetin' bout desc hard times, an /
low better raise my sarry to dollar
an a quarter a day"
You're not worth that, Ernest, and
you know it Besides, can't afford TO
pay more"
Ernest scratched his head; this was
a matter for more thought than he had
anticipated
Il fggered out when dey wuz takin'
bout dem hard times dat 1 couldn't
ford to work for no less. But''-his
black face cleaned with a sudden
thought won eat so much."-New
York Post
The broad ax. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1895-19??, 1915-05-15
The Profsssorys Rsproof.

During a certain athletic event at a
big university the students Of a certain
professors class, well aware that their
studies had been neglected, were pre-
pared for reproof, but not for just the
way in which it came.
At the end OF the hour the professor
slammed down his book on the desk
and exclaimed:
That's the worst recitation / ever
listened TO. Why, I've actually done
ntne-tenths Of It myself" Exchange.
The broad ax. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1895-19??, 1915-05-15
Wasted Effort

At a fire recently brave fireman
came gasping and painting from the
burning building with his eyebrows
singed in the danes. Under one arm
ne carried a small but heavy box,
which he deposited in a place OF safety
with the air OF man who had saved a
box Of government bonds from destruc-
don On opening the box it was found
to contain six bottles OF a new patent
nre OBSERVATION-DISCLOSURES.
The broad ax. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1895-19??, 1915-05-15
The Cruel sehoolmast.r.

An indignant mother wrote thus to
the principal Of an academy:
Dear Sir-My son writes me that he has
70 study too hard He says he has 70
translate fifty hexameters OF Latin q day.
looked 'hexameter'' up In the dictionary
and md IL IL a poetic verse Of six feet
Now, that makes 300 feet. or 100 yards OF
poetry for my poor son to translate each
day. think about half q hexametsr or
six inches OF this Latin IL enough for q
boy OF his age. Yours truly.
MRS BLANK.
-Woman's Home Companion.
The broad ax. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1895-19??, 1915-05-15
Two of Them.

Miss PAUL was one Of the teaenei'
at the mission Sunday school. One s-E
day the subject of the lesson was LIE
Second Commandment and MISS fa-I
began by asking little Adeloert DuS1D
the question: III.
Now, Adelbert, have we any "0D
In this country
For a moment the boy hesitated anu
then replied:
ayes. ma'am. Me dads Idle anu ~
uncle too."-HousehOld Journal
The broad ax. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1895-19??, 1915-05-15

when you come In the house does
your wife watch for your step On the
stafrT
she does, and have 10 be very
careful how I walk, for watch for her
stare ON ny stepI'-Baltimore Ameri-
can.
The broad ax. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1895-19??, 1915-05-15

Yes, he's one OF our leading citizens.
he certainly has climbed high In a few
years. Why. he holds our best federal
job"
Indeed! How did he get tit"
His brother-in-law is our leading pol
tician-"-Cleveland Plain Dealer.
The broad ax. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1895-19??, 1915-05-15

Buying ION tick" is not ne" sia a.0'
but goes back to the seventeenth ~
fury. 1t is stated in a le''el - r.
1861. The Mermaid tavern Is l1 az
broke. our ticks amounting TO IIT I.,.,
And in another document a niue ,. 20
It Is said. Every enc runs upon l'A
The broad ax. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1895-19??, 1915-05-15
Two Master Writers.

1t was an odd coincidence, but a
striking one. that the greatest genius
OF England and the most masterful
mind In Spain passed from earth on
the same day. Shakespeare and Ger
vantes both died April %. 1916, the
former being only hfty-two years old.
and the latter sixty-nine.
The broad ax. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1895-19??, 1915-05-15
RepudiatOd,

I'm a self made man. said Mr.. Cum
rox.
'fDidn't your wife have something to
do with your careerT
-She used to say so. But after seeing
how behave In society she refuses to
take any Of the blame."-Brooklyn Cit
fEan
The broad ax. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1895-19??, 1915-05-15
MAY Han. st.rt.d Him.

II wonder how Columbus got the
idea that the world was round?"
Il don't know that there is anything
remarkable about his deductions Amy
man along in middle age begins to get
the idea that the world Is not exactly
square.T-LOuisviIle Courier-Journal
The broad ax. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1895-19??, 1915-05-15

Bobby-Pop. what is reasonl Fond
Parent-Reason, my boy, Is that which
enables a man to determine what Is
light Bobby-And what Is INSTINCT
Fond Parent-Insttnct is that which
tails a woman she Is night whether she
- or not-Exchange.
The broad ax. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1895-19??, 1915-05-15
Insinuatina.

YES" boosted Slowpay, II have
bought an automobile now, but I win
pay you that s. 1 borrowed six years
ago"
Better be careful" responded Binks,
with fine sarcasm You might be
apprehended for speeding. Chicago
News
The broad ax. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1895-19??, 1915-05-15
PLACING the Blame.

young lady. that young man lorsIr
comes to see you stays outrAs
late"
"WeI. it's your fault papa
MY FAULT" mood 10.
aYes; mamma told him be q Ssst
on until Won came."-HOuston FO''
The broad ax. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1895-19??, 1915-05-15
Perfume.

When you use perfume and can It
such, DO you think how the name came
about7 1t means. in Latin, @trom
smoke" and the name proves that the
first perfumes were only aromatic
wo0cs or gums that scented the air
when burned
The broad ax. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1895-19??, 1915-05-15

Darling" he said. "WOulT uOOraI
tinue to love me if were TO Oe
my nfeT hin, swOud
MY dear" she askeu 80 IN sbOuJ
You continue to love me II y'S-.y-De
chance to become a millionaire
troit Free Press
The broad ax. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1895-19??, 1915-05-15
A Striking comnariaon.

Church, see the chances OF being
struck by lightning are four times
greater in the country than they are In
tne city. Gotham-Perhaps, but the
chances Of being struck by something
else are twenty times greater IN the
ciy.-Yonkers Statesman.
The broad ax. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1895-19??, 1915-05-15
cedars Conc Erom L.hannn.

The cedars are almost all gone from
Lebanon. according to John d. Whiting
OF jerusalem. writing in the National
Geographical Magazine. There are
far more Of these majestic trees In Eu-
rope and America than on their native
mountain.
The broad ax. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1895-19??, 1915-05-15
Fine Distinction

There are some things about life
that I don't understand"
what nowY
"A man is looked up TO II be moves
In circle and frowned down OF Il he
belongs to a ring. louisville Courier
Journal.
The broad ax. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1895-19??, 1915-05-15

Nodd-Do you think It Is true that a
great nay. a gigantic force like the
press OF this country, Il controlled By
the advertiseS7 Todd-why not the
press3 Ny wife ia-Yale Record.
The broad ax. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1895-19??, 1915-05-15
Innnnid p.an

These pampered dogs Of the rich
are rather listless. It seems 70 me-"
Yes; you never see one Of them
burying a marshmaIlOv or worrying q
chocolate rop.s-Judge q
The broad ax. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1895-19??, 1915-05-15
Ertinauiah.A

he was positively burning with love
.'oh. # was an right Her father put
The broad ax. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1895-19??, 1915-05-15

Dp 1Du always receive 4 warm wei
cone at homer
-oA, yes; I'm always N hot Wafel
tAGe-Ba Baltimore American
The broad ax. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1895-19??, 1915-05-15

Small Harry-our baby swallowed a
penny this morning. The Nelghbor-
Were your folks scared7 Small Harry
PA was. BE thought at first It was a
nVe dollar gold pieee.-C Chicago NswR.
The broad ax. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1895-19??, 1915-05-15
Wanted ProoE

Nephew (to the returning aunt And
nd you think Of me when you were
awayf Aunt Certainly. Nephew
Then open your trunk and let me see Il
-F1iegende BlatteE.
The broad ax. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1895-19??, 1915-05-15
Advice.

my boy" said the succes sS - d
chant. never let your capital y a. {
Remember that money IA. Boston
doesn't talk in its sleep
Transcript
The broad ax. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1895-19??, 1915-05-15
NaturaI ResuIt.

~What has become OF your nephewY
@The one who was so fond Of booksY-
yes"
~oh, he became a page In the legisla-
ture"-St Louis Post Dispatch.
The broad ax. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1895-19??, 1915-05-15

Arz church-Didn't you have a
house party yesterday at your homsi
Ass- Gotham-Yes; the landlord eaIIad
Tor his rent-Yonkers Statesman.
The broad ax. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1895-19??, 1915-05-15

Wealth Is mans worst enemy.s
That's why women love him Tor IL
enemies be has made. suppoae. =
Philadelphia Ledger.
The broad ax. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1895-19??, 1915-05-15
Generous

straneer-Did you ever reveal your
fishing hole 70 a frisndf AnEIer-Onc.
I did to q fiend on his deathbed-M-
change
The broad ax. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1895-19??, 1915-05-15

Ths great minds are tG icStns rsI.s
vide span, which couple -. s,cb StS
"a 70, but far removed from
er.-HOlmes
The broad ax. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1895-19??, 1915-05-15

There Is no wind Of March witch
cuts half 30 deep a. the unkind word
Of 2 frIend.
The broad ax. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1895-19??, 1915-05-15

Il f. an everlasting duty. the duty of
Delng brave. yalor = stn value.
The broad ax. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1895-19??, 1915-05-15

Common sense q instinct. ana enough
Of Il Is Esnius-H. W. shaw.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1915-02-14
NO STOMACH PAIN,
GAS, INDIGESTION
IN FIVE MINUTES
"Pape's Diapepsin" is the only
real stomach regulator
known.

Really does" put bad, stomachs in
order-'reauy does" overcome indi-
gestion, dyspepsia, gas, heartburn
and sourness in five minutes-that-
just that-makes Pape's Diapepsin
the largest selling stomach regulator
in the world. II what you eat fer
ments into stubborn Jumps, you belch
gas and eructate sour, undigested
food and acid; head is dizzy and
aches; breath foul; tongue coated;
your insides filled with bile and in
digestiblo waste, remember the mo-
ment "Pape's Diapepsin" comes in
contact with the stomach all such dis
tress vanishes. It's truly astonishing
almost marvellous, and the JOY is
it's harmlessness.
A large f1fty-cent case of Pape's
Dapepsin will give you hundred
dollars worth of satisfaction or your
druggist hands you your money back.
It's worth it's weight In gold to
men and women who can't get their
stomachs regulated. 1t belongs in
your home-should always be kept
handy in case of sick, sour, upset
stomach during the day or at night.
It's the quickest, surest and most
harmless stomach regulator in the
world.