davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1915-05-07
,Just : Social call.

My wife and are coming around
to see you this evening"
That's right; but do me a favor,
old man. Don't let your wife wear
her new suit; l don't want my wife
to see it Just now"
why, man alive, that's just why
we are coming"
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1915-05-07
One ON the Mcnnn y

The occupant Of a seat on the train
was disturbed by the struggles of an
elderly man who tried to place large
bundle on the rack overhead.
That rack is only for light articles"
protested the annoyed one.
Then why don't you put your head
on it?' was the snappy retort.-Bos-
ton Evening Transcript.
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1915-05-07
TOUCHES OF ECZEMA
At once Relieved by cutIcura quite
Easily. Trial Free.

The Soap to cleanse and purify, the
Ointment to soothe and heal. Nothing
better than these fragrant super
creamy emollients for all troubles af-
fecting the skin. scalp, hair and hands.
They mean a clear skin, clean scalp,
good hair and soft, white hands.
Sample each free by mail with Book.
Address postcard, Cuticura, Dept. KY
Boston, Sold everywhere.-Adv.
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1915-05-07
Grounds for Belief.

DO you believe that time is
money!"
II do. I'm clerk in a police mag
istrate Office"
What differences does that maker"
Well, I've often heard him say,
Ten dollars or ten days."
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1915-05-07

refreshing. felt
heavy and sleepy
after meals. was
always nervous
and tired. had n
bitter taste In my
mouth. was dizzy.
had hoatin
specks before my
eyes. was always
AN.f-~tss 40
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1915-05-07
squeIehed.

Old Sparkleigh Crying to make an
impress.on1-So, Miss Bright. you
have taken up kindergarten work.
Deeply interested in childhood, / sup
pose.
Miss Bright-Not In second child
hood, Mr.. Sparkleigh.-Chicago Tri5-
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1915-05-07
WrIter,a atYIe.

styiei Style Why. all writer's win
tell yoa that Il i the ys-y thing which
can least OF all be changed A mans
style Il nearly az much . part OF him
- any part Of his being which Il at
least subjected to the action Of his
wiii.-Fenelon.
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1915-05-07
The silent Partner,

"There's Perkins-you know Per
kins?-entered into an agreement
with his wife soon after their mar.
rage, twenty years ago, that when.
ever either lost temper. or stormed
the other was to keep silence"
And the scheme worked?"
Admirably. Perkins has kept 81.
lence for twenty years"
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1915-05-07
The Magnet.

Customer-I want to get a collar
for my wife's poodle.
Understanding plain. sir?
Customer-No, something snowy
and expensive looking. 1 want some
one TO steal the little beast-Boston
Transcript
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1915-05-07
AerobatIc Feat.

Percy gets along all right at these
afternoon teas"
Does, eh?"
Yes; he can hold plate OF salad
in One hand, q cup of coffee in the
other, and balance dish of ice cream
on his left shoulder. "--Louisvill
Courier-Journal.
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1915-05-07
conslderatIona Of preeedeneo

Considerations Of Precedence.
Why did that girl marry Mr.. Ad-
dlewell?"
Some idea of precedence. sup
pose. She wanted to be among those
who lead the list in the city direc-
tory"
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1915-05-07
chooalnn : ProfesaInn.

n don't know whether to make my
son N preacher or a lawyer"
Make him a lawyer. Then he'll
get five hundred or more for untying
3 knot. As preacher he would only
get ten for tying 1t.
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1915-05-07
No Chicken.

Lady (recently married)-Do you
know | find 1t quite hard to remember
by new name.
Her Friend-Naturally dear; you
had the old one SO long, you know
Detroit Free Press.
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1915-05-07

times have changed for the better.
Torture, for instance, is no longer al
lowed
Il don't know about that. There
are four families in this apartment
whose children take music lessons"
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1915-05-07
Her Opinion.

Mrs. Lit E. Rary.-What Il your
idea of the character of Mqcbeth9
Mrs. Pork Packer-Oh. reckon
her character was as good as any
eody's.-FIorida Times Union.
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1915-05-07

has a train II Is adjusted with snap
fasteners 50 that II may be removed
later for dancing and added again II
the costume Is to be worn in lts early.
impressive effect.
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1915-05-07
charItnhla-

There Ii gossip about Misc
Mayme's fixing up her eyebrows.
What do you Think"
Z don't think they're as black as
they're painted"
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1915-05-07

ALLEYS MO0T-EABE SOF the TROOP.
Over 10000 packages Of Aliens FooteKAaa. the
antlseptie powder 70 ahhks Into your shoes. are
being un4 by the German and Allied troops IS
the Front becAuse IL rests the feet gives in-
htaas relief 70 COFna and Duniuna, bot, aWOiisn
aching, tender feet, and makes walking sRAr.
Sold every wheFe, &c. TFF II TOMAX. Donsa
accept anT substitute. Adv.
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1915-05-07
A GRATEFUL ACKNOWLEDGEMENT.

Mr.. r. c. Case OF Welcome Lake.
Pa, writes: i suffered with Back
ache and Kidney Trouble. My head
ached, my sleep was broken and nm.
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1915-05-07

Every doctor In = small town lie fuE
ly convinced that he would have b@s
come world famous had he located In
n city.
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1915-05-07
lts 4 Accompaniment.

Il saw somewhere they are going
TO have ostriches served up at a
feast"
Il suppose IT will be in the form OF
feather pudding"
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1915-05-07

YOUR own DRUGGIST WILL TILL You
~ Muriae NE Hemsdy for ksa, Yeas. Waaerx
Insg Eye eomfoFt WFitS Tor hook Of fbs We
81 na1 Free. Msrhe Bye HsmsaY Co. CAieaSo
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1915-05-07
A naahInn Mnnnn.

Does she exercise her voice very
muoh?''
Why. she makes running com
ments on everything. Judge.
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1915-05-07
~ klnd.

Did Miss starcTaze swoon all right
at rehearsal?"
She made a faint attempt
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1915-05-07

After marrying the man who court
ed her girl 10 apt 20 find that be has
changed
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1915-05-07
Newer Satisfied.

HE gives twice who gives quickly"
That's right. Those charity collec-
tors always come back for more"
Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1915-05-07
From Mrs, s. T. PIchnon

PRovTpENcE, II. lie For The benefit Of wome1
done wish to state what Lydia T. Pinkham's
haa done for me. did some heavy lifting ~
caused aisplaoement. have always been WI
after my baby was born and Inflammation 80 /,
tratIon, from which did not recover until | had
hams Vegetable Compound. The Compound ]
When hear OF . woman with troubles like mil
Providence II
Iron County news. [volume] (Hurley, Wis.) 1913-1950, 1915-09-04
STAND ON ANCIENT RIGHTS
Northwestern Indians Insist on Fish
ing Without Licenses Accord
ing to Old Treaty.

Bellingham. Wash. - Attorney-Gen-
eraI w. V. Tanner came here to con-
fer with County Attorney W. P. Brown
relative to issuing informations for
the arrest of Indians for alleged Illegal
fishing, County Attorney Brown hav-
ing declined to issue informations re-
Gently for the arrest of FIVE Lummis
who had been picked up by deputy
State fish commissioner. Mr.. Tanner
was advised that until cases now in
the courts are settled one way or the
other no more informations viii be
filed.
The Indians are defending their
stand under the treaty of Territorial
DAYS. giving them the right to fish
when and how they please on ancient
and accustomed fishing grounds. The
fish commissioner is attempting to
compel the Indians to take out IL
censes.
Iron County news. [volume] (Hurley, Wis.) 1913-1950, 1915-09-04

empire for investment. England. Hol-
land. Austria-Hungary and Italy, in
the order named, followed Germany
in business with the Russians. Ger
man trade promotion was tn oroughly
organized throughout the land, and
in Riga, Petrograd and Moscow names
of thousands of German firms could
be SEEN
Russia, as are but few other great
nations. is self-sustaining in the mat
ter of raw materials; but the Musco-
vite empire is dependent upon the
factories of other lands for every step
that it may take in the upward scale;
1t is even dependent upon foreign
manufactures to maintain standards in
it's wide-sweeping territory as high as
they are today. There is fabulous
riches awaiting transmutation by Rus
sian industry, but Russian industry
has hardly passed the BIRTH
Iron County news. [volume] (Hurley, Wis.) 1913-1950, 1915-09-04
LITTLE BUYS GOOD EXCUSE
Couldn't Comb His Hair Before Going
to School Because Family Comb
Had Been Loaned.

Here is a story that was told at a
recent dinner by Miss Sybil Baker,
who was chosen queen of Rose Fes-
tival. at Portland, VIII en- reference was
made to the wonderful excuses in
vented by the rising generation.
One morning the teacher Of pub
tic school in a western village was
glancing over her pupils, when her
eye suddenly fastened on little VII
lie Brown.
Willie" said she in a stern voice,
didn't tell you not TO come to
school without having had your hair
combed?"
Eyes. ma'am." was the rather meek
full rejoinder of the youngster.
We'll, then" demanded the teach
er, little more severely, why didn't
you do it,"
Because l couldn't comb 1t. Miss
Mary" was the startling rejoinder of
Willie. we lent our comb to the
Smiths last night and they didn't
BRING 1t back. Philadelphia Tele,
graph.
Iron County news. [volume] (Hurley, Wis.) 1913-1950, 1915-09-04
PLENTY OF BREAD LEFT OVER
Mr., Smith, in the Amen Corner, or
fered Suggestion to Help Out Ger
tain Young Minister.

One Sunday morning a certain
young pastor In Ills first charge an
nounced nervously:
Il will take for my text the words,
And they fed five men with 5000
loaves Of bread and 1000 fishes
At this misquotation an old par
ishioner from his seat in the amen
corner said audibly:
That's no miracle could do 1t
myself"
The young preacher said nothing
at the time. but the next Sunday he
announced the same text again. This
time he got II right:
And they fed 5000 men on five
loaves of bread and two fishes
He waited a moment and then, lean
ing over the pulpit and looking at the
amen corner he said
And could you do that too, Mr..
SMITH"
"Of course l could" Mr.. Smith re-
piled.
And how would you do it?" said
the preacher
with what was left over from last
Sunday" said Mr.. Smith. -Advance.
Iron County news. [volume] (Hurley, Wis.) 1913-1950, 1915-09-04
THIS DOG CATCHES FISH
Water Spaniel Supplies the Needs OF
Owner and Neiahbors in
Indiana.

Aurora. Ind.-James c. Duggens. a
farmer, who lives on the Laughery
Greek. has q water spaniel that is
noted along the stream for it's method
OF catching fish. The dog has caught
4veral hundred pounds dur ng the
last few months for its owner and bis
nefgnbors.
The dog dives into the water and
soon appears with a fish in its mouth
aud will repeat rs dixmS for sewers
kours at a tine
Iron County news. [volume] (Hurley, Wis.) 1913-1950, 1915-09-04
oil Cloth Table Mats.

Oil cloth table mats for the chlF
dren will save many soiled tao'e
cloths. They can be made by taxing
either a square or an oblong OF ~hitS
linen, drawing threads and hemstIcr
ing all around. Sew on back n4A'
ing the finished article lock very macn
like a pillow cover with one end open
for the pillow. Into this slip a piece
of oil cloth the size of the mat anu
you viii have a useful and ATTRACTIVE
means of keeping the table neat lee
child's initial embroidered in the ce-,
ter would add much to the beauty %
the article.
Iron County news. [volume] (Hurley, Wis.) 1913-1950, 1915-09-04
Limits Of Delsarte.

Friend-Does the Delsarte system
teach you haw to act when proposed
to-"
Bride-"Yesl I studied that part
carefully"
Did you use it,"
Il used 1t with three or four whom
l rejected, and l did it beautifully, I
know; but when dear Tom proposed /
forgot all about NEW York Week,
"
Iron County news. [volume] (Hurley, Wis.) 1913-1950, 1915-09-04
Enalneerlnu rrIumph.

why are you studying that dachs-
hund so intently?"
Il consider him an architectural tri-
umph of Mother Natures" explained
the bridge builder. See how nicely
the stress Is calculated to the span"
-Judge
Iron County news. [volume] (Hurley, Wis.) 1913-1950, 1915-09-04
Unavoidable.

VI believe you are the same man
who was here about a year ago." said
the housewife
Maybe so, num-" replied the
tramp L was in these parts"
"And you haven't found any work
to do YETI"
only what was wished on me.
mum, by one or two hard-hearted
judges"
Iron County news. [volume] (Hurley, Wis.) 1913-1950, 1915-09-04
No Helm Then

Hints on courtship abound Every
magazine viii tell you how to win
wife. Anybody will gladly post you
on the etiquette Of love making"
What's on your mind?"
But after a mans marries he has
to shift completely for himself"
Iron County news. [volume] (Hurley, Wis.) 1913-1950, 1915-09-04
Uninferned.

What were the Seven Wonders OF
the World?"
i dunno" answered Mr.. Rufnek.
l never could remember much about
what | saw in dime museum or a
sideshow"
Iron County news. [volume] (Hurley, Wis.) 1913-1950, 1915-09-04
Dried Bread Crumbs

Dried bread crumbs absorb Ho's
liquid and. therefore, are better TOT .
moist dish. bGt crumbs grated %
crumbled from a fresh loaf taAe
lighter, mors delicate color, and %
better, therefore, for q very cAl1'
dish.
Iron County news. [volume] (Hurley, Wis.) 1913-1950, 1915-09-04
a Work Of Art

How'd you happen to buy so much
stock in that fake gold mine, Hiram"
''Th Teller who was sellin' il said it
was gilt-edged
"Pshaw! They all say that"
but. by cracky, he showed it to me
an it did haFN a gilt edge"
Iron County news. [volume] (Hurley, Wis.) 1913-1950, 1915-09-04
Interurban Prejudice.

rs this through train?' asked
the impatient man from New York
Yes replied the conductor. 1T
makes only one stop between here
and Philadelphia
That's a good idea. It gives a man
who has started for Philadelphia a
chance to think it over"
Iron County news. [volume] (Hurley, Wis.) 1913-1950, 1915-09-04
His COURAGE Failed

did you speak to father about me.
Arthur"
Yes, did, dear. and rs agreed with
p2e heartily
Then he said I might marry you?"
"Why-er-no didn't quite get to
the point OF asking him. just said
you were a fine girl"
Iron County news. [volume] (Hurley, Wis.) 1913-1950, 1915-09-04
SlzInn lin Eathnr-

Mother, is my father the greatest
man in the world"
mo, indeed, my dear"
but he's a greater man than
George Washington, isn't he?"
Certainly not Why are you ask
ing such foolish questions this morn.
ing?"
Il was just wondering why you ever
married him"
Iron County news. [volume] (Hurley, Wis.) 1913-1950, 1915-09-04
Force Of Habit

What's the matter with this no
tell ! can't get any answer to my
ring"
Sorry. sir, but you see all the
bellboys have made a rush to the
front"
Iron County news. [volume] (Hurley, Wis.) 1913-1950, 1915-09-04
Please Remember.

Mrs Meeks-This paper says no
parental care ever falls to the lot of
"A single member of the insect tribe.
In general. the eggs of an insect are
destined to be Matched long after the
parents are dead
Mr., Meeks-Now. dear, you know
why you have no right to call me an
insect. / hope
Iron County news. [volume] (Hurley, Wis.) 1913-1950, 1915-09-04
His Gait.

That old seS dog at the banquet
last night seemed to be continually
steering for tue wine on the side
board"
Yes, | noticed he had quite a list
to port"
Iron County news. [volume] (Hurley, Wis.) 1913-1950, 1915-09-04

Maj. Gen. George W. Goethals, gov
ernor of the Canal zone, arrived in
New York recently on board the S.
S. Pastores. He said he would offer
his resignation to take effect in No
vember. Colonel Goethals is accom-
panied by his wife and son Thomas,
and is here on leave of absence TO
visit the Panama-Pacific exposition.
The colonel expects to be put on
the active army list. and If this is not
possible, he will ask for his retire
ment with the rank of brigadier-gen-
eral. He told newspaper men that
he intended TO visit the exposition as
a private individual, and desired that
no fuss be made about him by any of
the officials That Mrs. Goethals is
anxious to leave the Canal zone per-
manently was shown by remark she
made shortly after the ship left quar-
antine and started for the pier: Il
hope never to go back she said.
Iron County news. [volume] (Hurley, Wis.) 1913-1950, 1915-09-04
The Query Discourteous.

so glad to see you again, dear. And
I've got such a lot of news for you. Did
you know was interested in business
now" said the first sweet young
thing.
'Whose?" asked the second. and
then the conversation Jagged per
ceptibly.
Iron County news. [volume] (Hurley, Wis.) 1913-1950, 1915-09-04
Tad Seen to Ne,s Nnrs

A Was9ingtonian has discovered a
way to remove the bones from a
shad'
Huh I'll bet there are New York
ers Who could do it without the shad-
knowinglt."
Iron County news. [volume] (Hurley, Wis.) 1913-1950, 1915-09-04
DISCOURAGED.

How did you happen to leave your
last boarding placer"
The landlady had such mournful
eyes"
Il don't understand you"
she always bent them upon me
when asked for a second helping"
Iron County news. [volume] (Hurley, Wis.) 1913-1950, 1915-09-04
Matter IF Color.

Parscl Snowhall-Dat youngest boy
oh yourn do seem to be one OBJ de
pesuferousc kind deacon
Deacon Flatfoot-Dats what he
am pafsad- Ho shore an de white
sheer OBJ nah rock.
Iron County news. [volume] (Hurley, Wis.) 1913-1950, 1915-09-04

You didn't know that girl was mar
ried?'
Not until l was printing a kiss on
her lips and her husband showed me
that l was making a typographical
error"
Iron County news. [volume] (Hurley, Wis.) 1913-1950, 1915-09-04
To keeo Pies From Burning,

To preveNt CAKES, pies ana 49,
pastry IRON burning on the h2''l--.'
sprinkle the bottom OF the oven ~ .
fine. dry salt. and your cake d Pr
VIII bake perfectly
Iron County news. [volume] (Hurley, Wis.) 1913-1950, 1915-09-04
Annarent contradletIon.

she twists her husband Sround her
little finger. Why. thought you
said she had him under her numb. -
Baltimore American.
Iron County news. [volume] (Hurley, Wis.) 1913-1950, 1915-09-04

Modern inventions are great"
Yes; before long it win be the cor
rect thing for a child to take a
pocket adding machine to school to
help in the solution of mathematical
problems"
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1915-01-29
AUSTRIAN MODS IN
RIOTS AGAINST WAR
Crowds Tear Down MObll
ization NOtices-Three
Killed by Cavalry.

Geneva. Jan. % The order OF the
Austro- Hungarian Government for the
mobilization of the last line Of re-
serves has brought about a serious
rising among THE southern Slavs, ac-
cording 20 uncensored dispatches
reaching here from Austrian sources:
The clergy. these advices say. headed
the movement of resistance, when pc
gan Sunday morning at Laibach, thirty
Eve miles northeast OF Trieste. AFTER
the sermon by Slovenian priest the
crowd is reported TO have left the
cathedral shouting Down with the
warlp Down with the Germans.
The rioters attacked the gendarmes
and. after shots were fired the cavalry
was called out and charged the crowd.
During the disturbance the Projects
palace was burned and its furniture
and pictures. which were thrown out
of the windows, were trampled 10
pieces.
At Agram. capital Of Croatia and
Slavonia, bodies Of students tore down
the mobilization notices, and It IS re-
ported that a Hungarian official, a
student ahd a child were killed IN the
rioting that followed. There was riot
ing also at Karlstadt. Croatia. where
the mobilization notices were de-
stroyed.
At Susak, near Fiume, the armory
OF the Hungarian landwehr IS said TO
have been plundered. An enormous
crowd, these advices from Austrian
sources also say, concentrated al
Opcina and then descended on Trieste
and Joined manifestants there. All
the boards on which the official no
tees of mobilization were posted were
destroyed and in the fight which fol-
lowed with marines two Of the rioters
are reported to have been killed.
Late dispatches state that the rot
ing continues and that general appre-
hension is felt as 20 the outcome.
Serious trouble is also reported IN
Pennsylvania, where Governor Count
Bethen, it is stated. has ordered that
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1915-01-29
GERMAN ONSLAUGHT
EXPECTED in MARCH
Expert Looks for Move
Before New Nations
Enter the War.
fBy Cable 70 The Tribune J

London, Jan. 29.-The military cor
respondent of "The Times" in an an
alysis of the German strength predicts
further attempt to break through
the Allies line in the west. lie says
that the recent calculation by Colonel
Shumsky that there were not more
than one million Germans in front of
the Russian armies is probably correct,
and adds:
War is not an exact science and
one can expect to arrive at only APP
proximate estimates. but IL is probably
near to the truth TO suppose that there
are at this moment about ninety-four
German divisions in the western thea
ire and forty-three in the east In
other words, the German masses are
where they have always benin the
west"
As regards the Germans strengths in
the west. the correspondent says evi-
dence shows that they are about four
ffths of the war establishments usually
attributed TO German formations. Thus.
forty-Seven army corps which should
normally stand at about 2,250,000, ac-
tually contain only about 100000 men.
1912. 1918 and 1914 classes will be re
quired to complete the establishments
in the west and east.
I'VE must expect two and a quarter
million Germans 10 be in front of Us
again soon. but behind them the mass
Of remaining reserves will be un-
trained men. The correspondent con-
cludes:
"What we have to expect is that Ger
many in view of a general situation,
which is only specifically advantage
Gus to her. may make last violent
effort in the west before the allied
armies are all assembled and before
the season in the east and the complet-
ed preparations of the states which are
contemplating an abandonment of their
neutrality place Germany at a manifest
disadvantage Already we hear Of the
landsturm in the front in German
trenches in Flanders, of training bat
talions full Of half fedged soldiers be-
hind them and of the withdrawal for a
period OF repose of some active army
corps on our front
"What we must be prepared 10 meet
is the replacement OF first line German
troops in the trenches by half baked
levies and the assembly at one or more
POINTS OF a great mass OF active army
corps for a last and decisive attempt
&c break through. Between Arras and
Disc is not an unlikely front for such
an operation, but whether il comes We
must be ready for it, and February and
March are the most likely months for
the attempt