Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1915-06-02

ance of a football scrimmage than of a
head-on collision.
Last week we looked over some examlna-
tion papers in search Of "howlers," but saved
a few subjects for today. Let us see what
we can learn from history.
History
Entirely right was the distinguished his
torian who said, Not clause in the Decla-
ration OF Independence sets forth the real
and underlying cause Of the American Revo-
| luton" For a schoolboy has discovered that
"the cause Of the Revolution was that the
colonists wanted room to pasture their cat
tie"
OF the Civil War a high school pupil
wrote, This war the soldiers had to deal
| with vicious characters, and l think this Is
why this is called the Civil War, because
after the war the different races of people
were more civilized" (Cf the present Euro
pean war;
Q. what happened in 1922" A. "Dis-
covery of America by the Spinach"
@. what happened in 1892" A. Dec.
oration Of independence"
Now a bit of ancient history: "Romulus
obtained the first citizens Of Rome by open
ing lunatic asylum"
Here are some "howers" from Harrow:
Rorke's Drift was battle at sea-
The White Mans Grave is the grave
whore General Gordon died in.
Feahs donkeys.
In William mrs reign Dysentry got per-
mission to worship.
Elizabeth ascended the Throne in 1883 and
died 1860. She did not have a long reign.
The Black Death was terrible for the la
bourers, because they were forced TO do all
the work that was left by the thousands
that died.
II English schoolboy who wrote
The King not allowed to order taxls
without the consent of Parliament" Can
excellent restriction on royal spendthrifts.)
Language
IAN abstract noun is something you can't
see when you looking at it,"
Gender shows whether n man is mascu-
line, feminine or neuter"
1.-TWO legatives make an affirmative"
THE masculine of vixen is vicar"
"A clause is group of words dstin-
guished as to SEX"
infection is to cast shadow on a sylla-
BILE"
Latin and French
HI notwithstanding to o. Henry
translated the opening words of the we'll
known Commentaries of Caesar, or rather
the well-known opening words of Caesar's
Commentaries follows: 1T will take all
Of our gall to devise means to tree them
parties" Small Latin and less French ap-
pear in the following schooboy translation:
III pleut a verse-He cries at poetry"
LIE occur purife-The disinfected yard"
"Ad hostes supplies sacerdotes venerunt
The priests came to the enemy in their
surplices."
Terra tribus scopulis vastum procurrit in
aequor-The earth being laid waste by three
scorpions runs into the sea-"
"Celeri sauClus maIus AFrIco-CaIar,
sauce is bad for African"
Mathematics
algebra was the wife of Euclid"
"Algebraical symbols are used when you
don't know what you are talking about"
Geometry teaches us how to bisex
angels"
The line opposite the right angle in a
right-angled triangle is called the hippo
potamus."
Parallel lines are the same distance all
the way, and cannot meet unless you bend
them"
Horsepower is the distance one horse can
carry a pound of water in an hour"
"Gravitation is that which If there were
none we should all fly away"
"A vacuum is a large empty place where
the Pope lives"
ITO kill a butterfly you pinch it's borax"
"A Eliminating animal is one that chews
It's cubs"
"Etymology is a man who catches butter
flies and stuffs them"
"The earth is an absolute spheroid."
THE Zodiac is the Zoo OF the sky, where
lions goats and other animals go after they
are dead" CHerein the makings of literary
man are apps rent-"the Zoo OF the sky" is an
excellent phrase. is it not?)
Conclusion
The salaries of teachers are paid from the
dog tax"
"The Eustachian tube is so you can hear
yourself talk"
"one great modern work OF irrigation is
the Panama Canal"
THE Rhine is bordered by wooden noun
tains."
''The Pyramids are range OF mountains
between France and Spain"
"a working drawing must be drawing
picturing a person at work"
Addenda TO last weeks Biographical Notes:
Shakespeare founded AS You Like It. on a
book previously written by Sir oliver Lodge
Henry VIII was very fat besides being a
Nonconformist" Andrew jackson was
called old Hickory because when he was a
boy he was a little tough"
freckled youngster who was sent TO the
blackboard by his teacher 10 write sentence
containing the word Income" evolved, after
considerable dihiculty; II opened the door and
in come a cat"
Another lad on another occasion used the
word ''rimbuetoo" orally with great success.
II played with my goats yesterday. Tom
bueked ana Timbuctoo"
Don't ever doubt "schoolboy howler."
Ask teacher,
NEW USE FOR AERoPLANEs