davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Western Kansas world., 1915-06-12
A Place for Everything.

The auto owner: No, 1 don't want
your book. / would much rather for
get my car troubles than perpetuate
them in black and white
The book agent: But this little
book is SO universally handy, don't
you know It's not merely a record,
it's lot of other things. / don't sup
pose there's anything that could hap
pen to an automobilewithout some
one of these departments covering it
You see, there are headings here for
virtually everything Take a look at
it
a heading for everything eh?
Don't you believe it Here. suppose
I'm driving a car along country road
Sunday afternoon A parachute jump
er goes up IN balloon from a near
py recreation park He swings on
sQuarely on my auto top and crushes
1T What's the heading for that fnan-
cial item. eh2'-
Just a minute. sir. Here you are.
Put 1t down here, sir. Overhead sx-
penses- Cleveland Plain Dealer.
Western Kansas world., 1915-06-12

procession started for the kitchen,
haling for a moment in the buffers
pantry SO that Helga could inform her
self as to whether we voted the Pro-
hibitiOn or Progressive ticket
Helga discovered four bottles of
beer coyly reposing on the ice in the
came lighted up with the joys of an
ticipation and she rushed out and
embraced the gas stove
When, later on. Peaches joined me
In the front room she looked woe-be-
gone and frightened. It's an awful
risk" she, sighed; Il feel that the
friendship of years may be interrupted
because we have a new and uncertain
cook IN the kitchen-do you get me,
John?"
Sure" I said; but what are we
going to do about it. Kid? It's too late
to cancel your bookings now. These
friends of ours have been saving up
their hunger for three days We can't
send them a buttered biscuit on a
postal card and pass them up. Let's
go through with it and hope for the
best-maybe Helga is a good cook"
I'm afraid not. John" Peaches
moaned She picked up a bowl of
radishes Just now and said she
thought Strawberries were out CT sea-
son. When ! asked her if she knew
how to cook chicken-a-la- king she
wanted to know which King-Den-
Rark or Germany
During the rest of the day Peaches
worried SO much about the new cook
Western Kansas world., 1915-06-12

firm in her belief that a chestnut is an
old wheeZe, so she stuffed the tu1 key
with peanut brittle.
Helga had noticed several other
things around the kitchen which ap-
peared to be bored and lonely, SO she
stuffed them in the turkey-one of
which was the corkscrew.
When I started to carve the turkey
the first thing / struck was horse
shoe which Helga had put in for luck.
1t made Peaches extremely nervous
to see the can-opener, pair of scis-
sors and seven clothespins come out
OF the interior, but when Mrs. Fftzen-
staatz said that their latest cook had
tried to stuff their latest turkey with
the garden hose friend wife felt bet
ter.
The next round was some salad
which Helga had dressed IN the kitch-
en-, but the dress was such a bad fit
that nobody would speak of 1t.
Then we had some homemade ice
cream for dessert
The ice was very good. but Helga
forgot to add the cream.
Consequently it tasted rather in
sipid-
Then came the last round-and the
knockout
Helga had been told to serve the
coffee demi tasse
When the cue came Helga foated in
the room clad in a low neck gown
such as the merry-merries wear In the
Bal Tabarin scene in the second act
Just before the police break ID
Western Kansas world., 1915-06-12
JAPANESE WOMEN IN POLITICS
Although Not Voters, Without Doubt
They Are Making Their Influence
Felt.

The participation of the women of
Japan in a public election is most
striking instance of the progress of
the woman movement throughout the
world Women in oriental countries
have for centuries occupied a menial
or subordinate position, and while Ja-
pan as the most progressive of east
ern people cannot be compared in this
respect with many of the other orieQ-
tai nations, the japanese woman has
been accorded the social freedom and
influence exercised among the more
progressive western nations 1t must
be understood, of course, that the
women of Japan have not yet been
given the ballot, Frances Frear writes
in Leshe's but in the recent election
of new house of representatives the
wives of several of the candidates
made a house to house canvass in be-
half of their husbands. The election
was of the greatest Importance, as the
last house was dissolved on last
Christmas day by the emperor be-
cause Of its refusal to ratify the mill
tary program of the cabinet Com
ment was made by the japanese press
upon the entrance of the new wom-
an into politics, but the fact that
women in Japan, contrary to all ma
tional traditions, have begun to take
an active part in political affairs is
significant instance of the leavening
process of the movement for woman's
emancipation The development of
modern Japan shows that when that
country does begin to move she moves
with great rapidity. Even more tre-
mendous will be the revolution in the
great Chinese republic when the pro-
gressive principles of the West begin
to work themselves out.
Western Kansas world., 1915-06-12

Then she spiashed down in front OF
all assembled a cup of brown cough
mixture and foated out again, while
Peaches turned red, white and blue and
1 mad all l could do to keep from be-
coming a murderer.
1t afterwards transpired that in the
shredded wheat which Helga was
using as a brain the words demi tasse
and decollete had become mixed and,
having taken the low-neck as a SOU
venir of former employer, she had
decided demi tasse meant Enter from
kitchen. smilingly with anatomical
display; place coffee on table. Center.
and exit, showing vertebrae-"
However, the house warming dinner
came to a finish without any casual
ties and the guests went home. hun
CRY but Imprisoned.
The next morning Peaches gave
Helga Helga and she left US abruptly,
followed by the prayers of all present,
including the gas stove.
The only thing about the house that
loved HeIga was a diamond brooch
belonging to Peaches and it followed
Helga out into the land of adventure
We've made up our minds, friend
wife and 1 have, that we'll give nc
Western Kansas world., 1915-06-12
SEEING LIFE zU1M
E rAq1, 1JOHN HENRY
VS1ha ha2y George VHObart
I'm. K.{W4tA John Henry On Home Dinners
John Henry On Home Dinners

that she almost had an attack OF nerv-
GUS postponement She walked around
the apartment with her fingers
crossed, murmuring little prayers to
herself and making wishes that Hell
gas idea of potato salad wouldn't
turn out to be imitation chop suey.
Our guests arrived promptly and we
could see from their eager faces that
they'd fight that dinner to a finish
Under ordinary conditions the ar
rival of trends with hearty appetites
is compliment to be cherished, but
| with a visitation like Helga in the
| kitchen, likely at any moment to kick
over the can containing the milk of
human kindness, 1 felt like eight
cents worth of God-help-us-
The ladies in the party began to
chat pleasantly while they sized up our
| furniture out of the corners of their
| eyes, and the men glanced carelessly
| around to see if / had a box of cigars
which could be attended to after din
ner
| At least I imagined that's what they
| were doing-having qualified as a bum
| sport from the moment Helga began
| to rehearse a dishrag.
| Presently dinner was announced
/
feet as though they'd stepped on a
| third rail.
The first round was oyster cock
tails, and everybody drew cards
This was Helga's maiden effort at
| oyster cocktails and she had original
ideas about the cocktail, consisting
chiefly of salad oil and tabasco.
The salad came from Italy, conse
quently the oysters were extremely
! foreign to the taste.
After exploring her cocktail glass
| with fork Mrs. Fitzenstaatz- politely
inquired if we raised our own oysters
| but just then a gill of tabasco struck
| Mr.. Fitzenstaatz between the thoraz
| and the epiglottis and he spent the
| rest of the evening screaming for the
| fire department.
| The next round was mock turtle
soup, but nobody under the wide can
4 opy of heaven can ever guess where
Helga found the mock.
| Sometimes / think 1 may have sur
prised her secret, because later on
when looked for my rubber boots, one
| Of them was missing.
Then we had fish-blue fish 1t had
arrived in the kitchen just a simple
| plain, kind-hearted fish with the blues
but after watching Helga's work il
had developed acute melancholia.
Then came the roast turkey, an6
| right here was where Helga stepped
to the footlights and clamored for the
Victoria Cross.
| Peaches had told Helga to stuff the
turkey with chestnuts, but Helga was
Western Kansas world., 1915-06-12
JUDGE cANARIES AT CONCERT
Hundreds TriII, 0uaver and Roll in
Auditorium in New York
for Prizes.

A committee of bird-music critics
sat in judgment recently at Labor
temple. in East Eighty-fourth street,
on the vocal accomplishments of sew
eral hundred canaries which had been
brought here from various cities un-
der the auspices of the Central Soci-
ETY. of Canary Breeders of America.
The birds were brought into the au-
ditorium from a darkened room, and
as soon as they saw the light they
burst into song. The critics listened
intently, observing each trill and qua
yer, and presumably in their reports
will tell those in good voice, whether
they sang artistically or not and what
the chances are of this or that yellow
bird making good if he studies hard
and remembers what the critics say
about him.
Prizes are to be awarded to the best
singers.-New York Sun.
Western Kansas world., 1915-06-12
IrickSter.

John H. Finley, New York's COM
missioner of education, said in AL
bany, apropos of an argument on BIZ
BILE reading in the schools:
This argument is straightforward.
1t does not shift and jump and beat
about the bush. 1t isn't like the tricky
schoolboy.
(Which would you choose his
teacher asked this schoolboy, the
tenth or the twentieth part of an
apple?'
The boy answered that he would
choose the twentieth part, and then,
noting with his shifty eyes his teach
er's frown, he added, hastily:
I don't like apples, you know -
Washington Star.
Western Kansas world., 1915-06-12

more dinners till we get a cook who
knows the difference between Dreaded
lamb chops and the coal scuttle.
Even the friendship of a lifetime
isn't proof against brass key-ring in
the stomach, which lies there, tossing
restlessly for weeks and weeks, some
times.
p. S.-Helga's contract called for
$500 per month, Sundays and Thurs
day evening out, and nix on the wash,
Have you a little fairy in your
home?
Western Kansas world., 1915-06-12
Few Sailors Row or Swim.

A survivor from one of the tor
pedoed ships says: I'VE had no men
in our boat who could row. l had new
er rowed a boat before, but 1 can do
SO now" The smallness of the num-
Der of men in our mercantile marine
who can handle a rowboat would
surprise the majority of people, and
those who can handle a sail are an
even smaller band. They get almost
no opportunity of learning. AS for
swimming, very few are experts, and
battalions of them cannot swim e.
stroke. Just last summer / sailed
with a British cargo boat off1cered by
nonswimmers, and having on board
only four men in all who believed
that, unaided, they could keep them
selves afioat.-London Chronicle.
Western Kansas world., 1915-06-12
The Human Touch.

There must be the sensitive touch.
visitor to a mandatory saw a man
molding clay into pots. Noticing that
all the molding was done by hand, he
said to the workman, why do you
not use a tool to aid you in shaping
the clay?" The workman replied:
There is no tool that can do this
work We have tried different ones,
but somehow it needs the human
touch" And how true it is that in
shaping lives for God there is need of
the human touch. We cannot do the
Lords work by machinery. Jesus
touched men, imparting health, cleans
ing and salvation.-Biblical Recorder.
Western Kansas world., 1915-06-12

GAY! did you ever get ready and
- move into a new apartment?
Take it from me it's an occupa-
ton that makes the burning of Rome
look like an election-night bonfire.
I'm going to talk harshly about it
some day when 1 recover the use of
three fingers, disfranchised by the un-
expected closing of a folding door
which had previously refused to fold
However, here we are in the "cozy
little nest that Peaches sopranoed
so canaryishly for many weeks before
we finally flew up into this tenement
tree.
Now that we are in "the nest" she
sings a different tune, poor girl, be
cause she finds it mighty hard to hit
a high C of joy when she has to put in
eighteen hours a day waiting for the
dumb-waiter to be fixed, and the hot
water to be turned on, and the knob
introduced to the dining room door,
and all the other thousand and one
prediction promises, SO earnestly
given and so eagerly unkept
Now we come to the plot of the
piece.
Peaches invited.a few friends to a
house-warming dinner and an hour
after they had vociferously accepted
our cook got mad becauses he found
out the Persian rug on her boudoiI
floor was made in New Jersey and
quit-left us fiat with a bunch OF
friends on our hands who had already
gone in training for a long heavy
feed; catch as catch can, strangle-holC
barred, but go to the mat with every
thing from clans to the printers
name
For twenty-four hours Peaches
spent her time hurrying between the
intelligence offices and the depths OF
despair. and that dinner party begaI
to look like cold turkey.
And the next day, just as / was
about to send out the S. o. S. signals
a tramp cook arrived with the milk
man, prepared to pour oil on our trou
bled kitchen stove.
The name of the new cook was
Helga. She was half Swede and hall
deaf.
Peaches asked her for recommends
recommendation was her face, but
that she tripped the night before and
broke it just above the chin.
Peaches engaged her-what else
could she do with kind and loving
friends eager to exercise our silver
ware and gurgling their hunger at oul
outer walls?
Helga was shown to her room. She
kicked a little because there wasn't {
Southern exposure, but subsided wheI
Peaches promised her a bunch of fresl
cut flowers every morning. Then thu
Western Kansas world., 1915-06-12
CLEAN SWEET SCALP
May Be Kept So by Cuticura Soap
and Ointment Trial Free.

To have good hair clear the scalp
Of dandruff and itching with shampoos
Of Cuticura Soap and touches of Cuti
cura Ointment to dandruff spots and
itching. Nothing better than these
pure, fragrant, supercreamy emol-
hents for skin and scalp troubles.
Sample each free by mail with Skin
Book. Address Cuticura, Dept. KY,
Boston. Sold everywhere.-Adv.
Western Kansas world., 1915-06-12
Advice Needed.

"I will take the matter under ad-
visement," announced the referee in
the divorce proceedings, and will de-
eide the case next week"
But, your honor" put in her coun-
sci, "the appellant is immensely veal
thy and
That said. the referee, lis the
point upon which / wish to be ad-
vised. This hearing is adjourned" -
Judge.
Western Kansas world., 1915-06-12
One Exclamation.

What's the difference between q
politician and statesman"
'1 figure it this way. A politician
has to wear a slouch hat and string
tie. But a statesman is sufficiently
sure of his job to feel that he can play
golf without offending the plain peo-
ple''
Western Kansas world., 1915-06-12
One for the Cops"

One TOT the Cops.
The Fallen One-Ofhcer, did you see
me fall?
Officer-Yes
The F. O.-Had you ever seen me
before
Offcer-No.
The F. O-Then how did you know
it was me?-Harvard Lampoon.
Western Kansas world., 1915-06-12
Animal Diseases.

Out of 57,oo0.00O animals inspected
In the last year $4,000 were found to
be infected with tuberculosis, and hog
cholera and cattle tick have cost the
producer anywhere from $1o0, 900. 600
to $150. 0.00O 600 in a single year.
Western Kansas world., 1915-06-12

You would be dismally lonesome i
everyone in the world were as goos
as you think you are
Western Kansas world., 1915-06-12

Any woman can manage man, IL
she can only prevent him from know
ing 1t.
Western Kansas world., 1915-06-12
Quite So.

you want employment and yet you
can't do anything
Sir, l was reared to be a lady"
That profession is slightly over.
crowded just now" responded the
business man grimly
Western Kansas world., 1915-06-12
Cheerful Roques.

trasts.''
For instance?"
Men who have a sunny disposition
and a shady character
Western Kansas world., 1915-06-12

The personnel of the British navy
is about double that of any other navy
in the world
Western Kansas world., 1915-06-12

Barcelona, Spain, does a large busf-
ness in the manufacture of paper
drinking cups.
Western Kansas world., 1915-06-12

Truth may not be stranger than fic-
tion. but it's a great deal shyer.
Western Kansas world., 1915-06-12

''I'' is the only letter in the alphabet
of egotism.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1915-02-18

lGothers' Rcnason Biu Is san In right
ing Thin.

There is evidence that the fight for
an unrestricted mothers pension bin
at this session of the legislature IL not
yet over. Protests against the sem
ate's action IN inserting ''referen-
dunn" clause in the judiciary commit
tee bill when it WAS reported. giving
counties Of Kansas local option In the
adoption of the pension. have been
pouring In to senators from all over
the state since the senate's action was
announced.
The bill is yet to come up ON third
reading. It is probable that Price OF
Lyons. whose own bill was defeated,
VIII renew his fight upon the objec-
tionable features OF the judiciary bill
at that time. Other senators profess
TO De waiting its temperance for IN
opportunity to put q knife into the
referendum" feature with the declar-
ton that they had rather see the
whole proposition killed than put on
the statute books in an emasculated
form.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1915-02-18
GRADUATION
High School Exercises Delayed by
Unfinished Condition OF Auditorium.

1t will be impossible to have the
graduation exercises of the January,
'15." class Of the high school March
s.. 1t is now certain that the audi
torium will not be ready by that time,
and the city auditorium is not avail
able because of the Topeka movies. -
The Peabody Furniture company
was awarded the contract for chairs
with the stipulation that they were
to be shipped within three weeks. The
three week period is up, and the
school authorities have been notified
that the seats will not be shipped be-
fore March s.
The contract would likely have been
awarded to another firm had the
memberA Of the school board known
Of TINS delay. A. J. Stout, principal OF
the high school, stated today that the
graduation exercises will be held in
the city auditorium, but the date had
not been set.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1915-02-18
ACLEARCOMPLEXION
Rudy Checks-SparlkliIIk Ely
Most Women Can Have
Says DIR. Edwards. Well Known Ohio
Physician.

DIR. F. NJ Edwards for II years
treated scores OF women for liver and
bowel ailments. During these years
he gave to his patients . prescription
made of a few well known vegetable
ingredients mixed with olive oil. nam
ing them DIR. Edwards Olive Tablets,
you will know them by their olive
color.
These tablets are wonder-workers
on the liver and bowels. which cause
a normal action, carrying off the waste
and poisonous matter that ones sys-
tenn collects.
II you have a rale face. sallow look.
dull eyes. pimples, coated tongue.
headaches. listless, no-good feeling.
all out OF sorts. inactive bowels, You
take one OF DIR. ECwards' Olive Tab
lets nightly for time and note the
pleasing results
Thousands Of women. as well az
men. take DIR. Edwards' Olive Tablets
now and then just to keep In the pink
OF condition.
DIR. Edwards Olive Tablets. the sue
cessful substitute for calOmel-10c and
Csc per box. All druggists.
The Olive Tablet Company, Column
! bus, Ohio.-Adv.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1915-02-18
MARRIAGE LICENSES.


Following is a list CT marriage Ii
.censes today issued from the office
of Hugh MacFarland, probate judge:
Nelson G. Logan. over p. Beloit.
and Esther Cooke, over 20, Topeka.
Oliver Warner, age %. Burlingame.
and Effie Phelton. age, rs, Scranton.
Leonard A. Niles, age %, Bur-
lingame, and Viola Warner. age 20,
Burlingame.
Ben Taylor, age AZ, and BERTHE
Woods age 20, both Of Topeka.
Clifford B. Tew, age 81, Topeka, and
Mabel E. King. age IS, Topeka.
Frank ]. Elliott. age %, Dodge City,
and Laura Walker, age %, Cresco, Ia.
James e. Metz, age 81, Falls City
Neb., and Theodore Richards, age 49,
Falls City, Neb.
Charles r. Sare. age 81, and Dorcas
c. Mosher, age %. both of Republic
Kansas.
Fred Hemingway, age 25, Great
Bend, and Grace D. Dewolld, age 10
Emmett
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1915-02-18
SENATOR At HEAD?


1t has been announced that John H.
Atwood will be one of the speakers at
the Democratic banquet to be given
on Washfngton's birthday. Febru-
airy %.
Several prominent Democrats in
Kansas have been mentioned for
president of the Kansas Democratic
club. among them being Senator Harry
McMihan. A. A. Doerr. Senator B. p.
Waggener, Senator A. b. Carney. SEN
ator j. w. Howe. Jasper Kincaid and
T. A. Moxcey.
The speakers will be Congressman
Elect Jouett Shouse of Kinsley, who
will talk on What of the Future
Col. Fred J. Close of Kansas City,
Kan. will have as his subject, Sol
diers Have Been Benefited as Democ-
racy Has Succeeded" Mrs. r. c. lay
man of Hutchinson win make an adj
dress at the banquet. The Kansas
Woman's Political IDEAL Miss Elix-
abeth Anderson of Topeka will render
a vocal solo at the affair.
The sale Of tickets is progressing
we'll.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1915-02-18
'MULR0Y IS SAFE


The senate this morning. endorsed
the Kansas hotel inspection law as it
stands by refusing to knock out the
hotel commission. A vote of IS to IL
approved substitute bill written by
Senator Porter which amends without
changing In any important way the
existing hotel inspection law. The
Porter substitute will be spread upon
the statute book as the Davis bills
fact at which the senator from Bour-
the upper house put the finishing
touches upon the complete bill.
The morning session was filled with
acrimonious discussion. In its course
q v1tuperattve attack was made upon
Miles Mulroy. state hotel commission
er, by Senator Noah L. Bowman of
Anderson county. who accused him of
''brazenly sitting on the floor OF the
senate. advising its members az to
their action"
For weeks he declared, this man
has been lobbying with members OF
this body In violation of all the rules
or the senate and to the neglect of the
duties of his own office. il he has any.
The bare fact that he has time to de-
vote himself constantly to the defeat
OF legislation Is the best argument
that the job he occupies ough. to be
Senators Porter, Nighswonger.
Howe and others rose to Mulroy's de-
tense. The hotel commissioner had
been seated by Senator Porter when
Bowman's attack was made. Porter
arose to question Of personal privi-
lege and declared Mulroy occupied the
seat as a guest and at his expressed
invitation. The other senators de-
ciared he had never discussed the bill
with them. Mulroy held his place.
The Porter amendments to the
present law merely change the bust
nf ho hotel cf<S,,
from the calendar year to the fiscal
year. June 80. and correct the lam
guage of the law where, due to some
previous careless amending, it de-
clares that allhotel carpets and fur
niture. as well as walls and ceiling.
must be kept carefully plastered.
The Davis bill. which was displaced
by this amendment. provided for the
adjustment of the hotel inspector and
the direction OF inspection work by
the state board of health. the actual
inspections to be made by sheriffs,
marshals and police officers.