The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1915-10-30
Topeka Newsies Laugh at Prof.
McKeever's Plan.
"Gee to Betsy" They Exclaim,
"Who's Dis Guy at X. VI"
HOUSE AND PARSONS PARADE
Mayor Straddling a Broom;
Harve "Ring, Round Rosy"
Answer to Sane Halloween
Suggestion From University.

If William McKeever of Kansas uni
versity ever runs for president, he
need not expect the suffrage of the
Topeka newsies who held a council
of war following the publication of his
plan for q sissy Halloween. Even
the taking away of the Fourth of July
cannon crackers did not infringe so
seriously upon the rights of young
America as Professor Mckeever's
plan for Halloween pageants and an
abolition of the trough stuff"
Professor McKeever was one of the
judges in the model town contest and
he helped to inspect the unwashed
necks and ears of Kansas youngsters
and did other things tending to make
him unpopular with the younger gem
Grafton. Kansas youngsters, though.
are of a forgiving spirit and were not
inclined to hold this crime against the
State university man. But when Nc
should be converted into tiddle-wipks
game with the elders doing foolish
stunts in a public masquerade, Kan
sas kiddies turned up their noses in
disgust and cut Professor McKeever
from their speaking list.
Who's Dis Guy?
Gee to Betsy, Happy, who's dis guy
at K. U. who puts the hardware Oh
Halloween" asked an ambitious young
Kansas avenue news butcher as he
stood with fifty associates waiting for
Mary Ann, the big State Journal press,
to begin the distribution of the days
world news.
Huh! Ask your dictionary" was
the contemptuous reply of newsy Mo-.
Dat cook draws money for dose
things. He's one of yer dedicated col
lege matinee idles. wouldn't we pipe
fancy followin' dat in parade.
P'raps he'd want us to sing Onward
Christian Soldier and walk with
goil down the avenoo."
The newsy demonstrated his dis
gust by kicking a dent in the news
- essr ROv~ ra1
free-for-all debate-only everyone
talked for the plaintiff and the J.
lege mans reform was a martyr of TIE
press room patriots.
He Just Yelled Boo.
"Ain't 1t fine sport Old Four Eyes
has in his bean, eh, Mickey" sug-
gested another volunteer orator. Bet
me poipers agtn brass thimble the
OIL spav was some sure sport in his
days. Muster strung popcorn on a
thread on Hallereen. Mebbe he even
had a taller HANDLE an opened the
door an yelled boot JUS like dat
and then run an hid under his mud
ders apron. Say, wouldn't we have
a show If the OF fox just followed us
around one Hallereen night?'
Mayor House and Chief HaPve.
Another "Uxtry' warrior recalled
some of the suggestions Professor Nc
Keever wanted Incorporated in his
safety first" Halloween.
wouldn't Chief Parsons be a regl'r
ducklin' out under a '1ectric light
playing Ring Round the Rosy with
a bunch NV starched up COILS from the
young ladies' 'broidery club? Kin
We beat it? Honest. Tink Nv it?"
The speech won a curtain call and the
youngster followed McKeever's sug-
gestion and put Mayor House in the
Halloween pageant
Couldn't yer just rip yourself
watchin' Jay House dressed up in a
muver hubberd and rioip' a broom in
n parade?" continued the outraged
newsy. ''Mebbe they'd get the sher-
uff or some udder fat hick to dress
UP like re guy wot gifts his pitcher in
the poiDer wild dollar signs all over
his clothes. Mebby de collidge guy
would also let Major Harvey or John
Dawson or Roy PenwelI carry suf-
fridge banner and Rev. Gordon would
be real swell wild a banner about de-
mon rum"
Oats alright for yer Tessies." said
senior in the nevsy herd. But
chap wot's got real red blood in his
veins-hully mushi Dey'H be wantin'
us ter wear bihs on the street and use
one eye glass and a dude stick when
de baseball season opens Why don't
desc hicks fergit that they've growed
up an Just ter be human once an
see how it feels?"
Town, Country and Motor Cars.