Norwich bulletin., 1915-11-04

T bought the most wonderful thing today" announced the stout woman who vas industriously crocheting pink borders around washcloths Its a regular carpenters tool chest all com- bined in one little weapon that sun- screws in all directions and let's the different tools sort of pop out You can do anything with 1t, from tuning a piano to sharpening a lead pencil, and I now expect to save enough on repair bills to buy a set of furs! John is so clever around the house, anyhow, and with this"
 You poor thing!" feelingly breathed the thin woman who was tatting. T hate tc wipe the cheery expression from off your countenance. but I feel 1t is my duty to do so before it is too late! Take that marvellous little won- der worker out in the back alley and let a grocery wagon run over it or dig up paving stone and bury it se- curelyi Then try to act as though nothing had happened and maybe no one will taunt you with your criminal foolishEess!''
 Mercy goodnessl" gasped the stout woman. What"
 went on the thin woman in the tone that one would use in confessing that he had on occasion robbed a bank and wrecked the noon train laden with an orphans picnic excursion. T thought was doing something smart and when Henry came home ran to him like Q gleeful child. I explained that now our troubles were over and the song of the turtle would be heard in the land, so to speak.
 Henry was interested He said, by love, that certainly was a clever It, tie instrument and it was bright of me to get it. It was just what he had needed to fix those bathroom fau- cets that were driving him crazy, leak ing as they did. No need of a. plumber to do ten minutes work and charge for an hour and a half timei
 Henry took the tool and disappear ed and presently he yelled for help. When l got there the water was just beginning to run over the top of the tub with Henry frantically trying to stop the open pipes with toothbrushes and soap. He had the faucets all un- screwed. I dashed in and tried ty- ing wash Cloths around the holes in the pipe, but they weren't much good. We had to plaster the whole ceiling in the room below. because so much water leaked through the bathroom and the plumber was there three hours putting back the parts of the tub Hen ry had taken off.
 After it was all over and the bills paid Henry sprang to his feet one CNCIl11lG as lAOu6A d D00 Hdu him. There he cried, I know what has been bothering my subconscious brain all along about that danged bath room affair. The trouble was that I didn't shut off the water at the base ment cutoff! Of course, it was a great satisfaction to know what really had been the trouble. Every time I meet that plumber I want to stop him and forcibly take that money away from him!
 "Tben there was the time I tried to use it to tack down some mating with the little tool. The place where hit my thumb turned dark purple and gave me blood poisoning and the doctors bill was in proportion to the pain l suffered. Even that didn't cure us. Henry used it to fix the back gate and he left a nail sticking out some way, and the Dilliger's horrid little boy hunted around till he found it and then deliberately walked into it and | came so near putting his eye out that his mother still gnashes her teeth at sight of me! The Dilligers little boy said he was only playing ball and tumbled against the nail, but I am positive he did it on purpose. What with the lawyers calling on us at in- convenient times and the excitement in the neighborhood, to say nothing of the Dill we paid for Tommy's eye, we ought to have known better.
 However, when I inadvertently said that upper B was out of tune on the piano Henry hopped to his feet