The Washington herald., 1915-01-10
THE SUCCESSFUL WIFE

There are all sorts of things that
change Loves fetteTs." as the poets
say, from the chain of fairy gold to the
agging weight of iron links. If the
chain OF fairy gold. which never tar
nishes and is as light as swansdown,
could only bind the two hearts and the
two lives forever together. what
happy place this old world would he,
But. somehow, before we know ii, the
delicate gold is gone and the two
hearts are bound together by a dull.
heavy chain that corrodes into the very
soul one or the other of the fellow
prisoners.
Sometimes the causes OF this tragedy
lie deep within the inner heart OF char
aCter. When falseneSs or selflshness or
licicptiousneSS take possession of one
of these two hearts their moral dam
nation IL so great that loves golden
fetters" must inevitably be transmitted
into a bah and chain. But what OF
the causes that are less tremendous?
Tho fairy gold goes and the iron fet-
tors come when there is no such gross
ness as the cause. How did il hap
pen: many a woman asks herself. Sc
cure in the knowledge that neither her
husband nor herseS have broken the
laws of the Decalogue. She docs not
realize mat the cumulative effect of
trifing annoyanccs may be frightfully
disastrous.
She does not think that the petty
surveillance she has subjected her
husband to for so long has anything to
do with the dimming of the romance.
II she were asked point-blank if she
trusted her husband, or asked if he
were a man capable of taking care of
himself. she would be indignant at such
NaF hnY NfF
a little trip together she will ask him
if he has attended to this or that de-
tail as minutely as If he had never
taken a trip before. What girl, in
starting. on an excursion with her
fiance. would ever insult his intelli-
gence by such questions as: Are you
sure that you have enough money with
yOu?" or Are you quite sure you
haven't lost the tickets?'' She would
have perished rather than to doubt his
generosity by such a question as: Did
you engage parloT car seats? 1t will
be horrid to have to travel in the ordi-
nary coach!" She would not have cast
such a reflection upon her fiance's COM
mon sense or his chivalry as she shows
when she filings such inquiries as these
at her husband: why didn't you bring
an umbrella" why don't you offer to
carry my raincoat?'' Did you remem-
you buy some magazines" "Why don't
you raise the window for me? What's
the matter with It? Aren't you strong
enough to do it? There, the porter was
very obliging. wasn't be?-did you give
him tip? Why not?"
After such a fusillade as this the
poor man hSturally seeks refuge in the
smoker. Instead of asserting with a
gracious smile to his announcement
that he wants a cigar. as she would
have done before they were married.
nine times out OF ten she will say:
Don't stay all day. and don't get to
playing poker" When he finally re-
turns with an apologetic hope that she |
has not been lonely, instead OF the po-
lite denial she would have smilingly
her fance, she says: why |
did you stay so long? Do you think it's |
nice to leave me alone all this time |
You know you ouEhtn't to smoke so !
much, Or were you listening to a lot |
Of horrid drummers' stories?"
Little by little this habit of cross
examination grows upon a wife; she |
does not realize its importance-few of |
us do realize the Importance of little |
habits of speech or thought. If. in
stead of carelessly allowing the habit /
Of unnecessary questioning to imperil
her happiness every wife would culti-
vate the habit of taking certain things
for granted. the irksomeness of mar
ried life would be averted.
To know what to take for granted /
and to use that knowledge is q gift to
beg Of ones fairy godmother. Too many
wives are not only careful Marthas
troubled about many things" but they
pour out these troubles into ears that
are at first interested and then, at last,
bored. A wife should take for
granted that in any important house
hold matter her husband will be her
sympathetic adviser. but she should |
also take for granted the fact that
petty details of housekeeping do not
thrill his soul any more than the petty
details of his business thrill hers.
In the first lover-like days Of mar
ried life there are many demonstra-