Bridgeton pioneer., 1915-05-13

them, and nOthin., Ou earth could have
saved US from typhoid fever or diph-
liberia. II the lnicrO1e was the only
thing zoos Out for / shouldn't have
been SO anxious. but there is the bac-
terra"
What's thatT"
Here is a picture of him. Comes in
the same way. and his mission is to eat
out the lungs. 1t is calculated that
1000 of them will eat out the strongest
mans lungs in month
And they were i'll this house?"
Yes, and ready to be absorbed into
our systems. Not only ready, but
anxious
You are sure you don't mean cock
reaches? l saw two under the kitchen
sink yesterday and was going to ask
you to get some powdered borax."
"Mrs. Bowser." he began, as he
stood up. Are you growing soft in
the top Of your head? Do l know a
Bengal tiger from a woodchuck?"
IL suppose So
But l don't know a microbe or a
bacteria from cockroach," he thun-
dered
But | have never heard you speak
Of them before, and ~
DO you suppose that or any other
husband sits down and tells his wife
all he knows"' he shouted. Because
| haven't told you that a jack rabbits
legs have three toes is that any rea-
son why / haven't known it for forty
years."
But this is medical science, isn't
it?' she softly protested.
And suppose it is. Do you sup
pose I've gone sloshing around all
these years with nothing but a recipe
for making soft soap in my head?'
She was silent, and after striding
up and down the room a few times
he halted before her and continued:
"A wife isn't expected to know these
things, of course, but I'd be accounted
pretty husband and father and men,
Der of scientific club If l didn't
know all about microbes and bac-
teria'
But that picture of a bacteria looks
like lobster" she persisted.
Lobster Looks like a lobster, does
it? Very well, Mrs. Bowser, this dis
cussion will end right here. 1t is plain
enough that you haven't the necessary
knowledge to appreciate itr'
"But don't you
"Never you mind, Mrs. Bowser. Let
it drop right here. Is supper ready?"
The odOr was so strong in the din
ing room that the butter tasted of it.
and after supper the cook called Mrs.
Bowser into the kitchen TO ask:
rs it going to be like this all the
time?'
"Oh. no. Mr.. Bowser had to kill off
all the microbes and bacteria, you
see''
whats them?"
Hell have to come in and explain"
mo need of it, ma'am, for my bun
die is all made up. and I'm goin'. A
man who'll drag dead cats through his
own house would cheat poor girl out
of her wages at the end Of a month.
Microbes and bacteria, ehi / don't be-
up in the geological gardens"
When Mrs. Bowser told Mr.. Bowser
what had occurred he bristled up, got
red in the face and exclaimed:
II see how it is. You couldn't carry
your point with me. and so you went
out and upset the girl. Mrs. Bowser,
you are treading on dangerous ground
A husband may be a worm, but if
that worm is stepped on too often he
turnsr'
And he clapped on his hat and walk.
ed over to his family drug store, and
after peering into the window and see
ing that the druggist was alone, he
entered and asked:
doc, are you protected from mi
erobes and bacteria here?"
Thoroughly" was the reply.
"What do you use?'
"Why, every time you come in and
go out 1 sprinkle the floor after you
with catnip tea"
Mr.. BOwser turned and went out
into the night and leaned up against
fence, and in his inmost soul realiz-
ed that he was a man with plenty of
bacteria and microbes, but without
human friend.
And an owl lighted on a nearby tele-
phone pole and hooted three boots.
Force of Habit.
''See here, boss, l ordered tripe and
beans with coffee, and the waitress has