The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1915-01-31

1.-THE name of this story Is adopted
from a tree, the araucaria a species of
large evergreen. with Hat. sin. sharp
pointed leaves. ThiS tree is 50 difficult to
climb that II is colloqullly denominated
n monkey puzzler" The tale deals with
the antics Of certain ape who was de-
cidedly puzzled and with the emotions de-
veloped thereby in the breasts Of three
notable Brtonsl
T HAD not seen Penfcntenyou since
the middle '9Os, when he was Min
l. lister of Ways and Woodsdes i'm DE
Thouar's first administration. Last
summer, though he nominally held the
same portfolio he was his colonys Pre-
mier In all hut name. and the idol of his
own province. which is two and half
times the size Of England. Politically
his creed was his growing country. and
he came over to England to develop a
great idea i'm her behalf
Believing that he had it EN- train.
made haste to welcome him 10 my house
for a week
That he was chased to my door 10y
his own agent general in motor; that
they turned the study into a Cabinet
meeting which I was not invited to at
tend; that the local telegraph all but
broke down beneath the strain of hum
dred word coded cables and that /
stranger on n Sunday to get him tele-
phonic faCilhies-are things over
looked. All I objected To- was his in
gratitude while I thus tore up England
to help him. So I said: why on
earth didn't you see your opposite num-
her in town instead Of bringing Office
work here"
"Eh? Who?" said he looking up
from his fourth cable since lunch.
See the English Minister If Ways
and WoodSides"
II saw him" said Penfentenyou with
out enthusiasm.
1t seemed that he had called twice
on the gentleman. but without an APP
p0intment cI thought II 7 wasn't big
enough my business wasD and each
time had found him engaged A third
party intervening suggested that a
meeting might be arranged IL due notice
were given.
Then" said Penfentenypu 81 called
at the office AT 10 O'Clock"
But they'd De- in bed" cried.
"One of EN- was awake He told mo
that-that my sort Of questions he
slapped the pile Of cabcs-wcre only
taken between II and p. NJ. SO |
waited.
And when you got to bus!ncss?" I
asked.
liz made a gesture Of despair 1T
was like talking to children; they'd
never heard II it,"
And your opposite NUMBER"
Pcnfcntvnyou described him
Hush You mustn't talk like that"
I Shuddcrcd. "H,'S one of the hest of
good fellows. You should meet him So
oially."
rive done that too" he said. Have
your"
No" said /, but that's the proper
thing to say. only | thought as this
was Ef gland headquarters that they'd
more or less have the hang of all the
general hang together of my scheme
But had to explain it from the be-
ginning"
All. They'd probably mlslaid the
papers | said, and told him the story
of three million pound instruction
caused by Deputy nder Secretary
sitting upon a mass of green labelled
correspondence instead Of reading it.
Il wonder 1t doesn't happen every
week" he answered. "Dyou mind my
having my Agent General to dinner to-
night? III wire and he can motor
down"
The Agent General arrived three
hours later-a patient and eXpostulat-
ing person, visibly torn between the
pulling devil of rampant colony and
the placid baker of largely uninter-
csted England. But with Pcnfentenyou
behind him he had worked. for he told
Us that Lord Lund.e Ga Law Lord was
the final authority ON the legal and
constitutional aspects Of the great idea,
and to him it must be- referred.
Good heavens alive Numbered
Penfentenyou. 81 told YOU to get that
settled last Christmas--"
"lt was the middle of the house party
season" said the Agent General. Lord
Lundie's at Credence Green now-he
always spends his holidays there. It's
only forty miles on"
"Sha I | disturb his Holiness?" said
Penfenlenyou heavily. perhaps my
sort of questions he snorted "mayn't
De discussed except at midnight"
"Oh, don't be a child" ] said
what this country needs" said
Penfcntenyou and for ten minutes he
trumpeted rebellion.
Upon this ! showed him yellow
paper supplied gratis by Government
which is called Schedule u, To my
mercilcss delight he had never seen the
thing before and ! completed my vie
tory with a Brassey's Naval Annual and
Statcsman's Year Book
The General Agent intcTp0sed with
ar, mt generalitles Cbut they were more
proyocateurs) about ties of sentiment
They be bowed" said Penfentenyou.
whats the good of sentiment toward
a kindergarten?
quite so, Ties Of common funk are
the things that bind us together, and the
sooner you new nations realize it the
better What you need is an annual
foreign invasion Then you'd grow up ="
Thank YOU Thank you" said the
Agent General. That's what I'm
always trying to tell them at home"
But, my dear fool" Pcnfcntenyou
almost wept, edo you pretend that these
banana fingered amateurs are grown
up"