The Lakeland evening telegram. (Lakeland, Fla.) 1911-1922, 1915-09-16
OLD FEB WHITE
He Teils q Story About a Csntankerous
Man
By M. QUAD
Copyright, 1915. by the Mcclure
Newspaper Syndicate
By M. QUAD

see, as he got his pipe al1ght one even
Ing on the dOOrsteps. "Mebbe the wust
rritter of the lot was named Tom
Smith. He didn't hev no family, but
lest sorter hung around at the cO'ners.
He was powerful on the brag, but he
could fight fur all that and bimeby
everybody got skeered O. him. He went
about with chip on his shoulder and
blood In his eye till sum men moved
away to git cl'ar O him. Fur sum
reason he didn't bother me fur long
time, but one day when | went down
to the co'ners to sell sum pOssum pelts
Tom was outer sorts and opened ON
me. He looks at me long time with
a glare in his eye. Then he throws
down his hat and jumps on 1t and
yells:
"'whoopee. Zeb White, behold the
jumper from Jumpersville! I'll bet my
rife agin them pOssum pelts kin out
jump yo' by six inches. II yO' ar
man with legs under yo' cum out and
try on me!
II seed he was tryin' to pick quar-
i
him and tried to git away.
II was in mighty pore health" ex.
planned Zeb land no match fur SIGH a
man, and so l had to crawfish. Ev-
erybody said orter shoot him down,
but couldn't shed blood that way. 1t
hurts me to this day to remember that
l went home like whipped cur, leavin
that critter crow over me, but my mind
was made up to tackle him as soon as
l felt like a man ag'in. When | got
home | was cryin'. and the old woman
SEE to me, seq she:
"'Zeb, has the wah broke out ag'in!
mo
Then what's the matterT
I've bin bluffed.'
"'D'ye mean that Tom Smith has
crowed over yo'Y
That's jest what he has, and I'm so
pesky weak in the knees that ! had to
sit away from him.
Jest backed yo' down, did he?
He did. It's the fust time in my
life l ever crawfished fur any human
critter.'
"'Reckon it is, Zeb. l knows how yO
feel. But yo' couldn't help it. If 20
tackled him he'd hev broke yo' in two
I'll go right at it and nurse yo' up,
and in TO- weeks yo'll be fitten to whop
Tom Smith till he can't boot. If yO'
hain't, I'll put on yo'r clothes and
whop him myself
Fol ~ tok
though couldn't get over the hurt to
my feelin's. One evenin', about two
weeks after the fuss and when was
gainin' on 1t. but not feelin' much bet
ter, was sittin' right we're when
cOtched sight Of a bar across the road
by them rocks. Plenty of bars around
we're them days, as nobody had beer
home to kill 'em off. About the time
l cotched sight Of the bar Tom Smith
showed up. Tom saw me a-sittin
we're, and he stopped right by tina,
tree and throwed down his hat ant
yelled, 'Zeb White. ar that yo' a-sot
tin thar
at arr
"'Do yo' call yo'self a manT
"'Not well man. II yo'll gin mi
TO- weeks mo- I'll run yo' outer tn,
kentry.'
"Waal," sighed the old man, n,
talked that way till got mad and Ri
up to go, but jest as l did so that b'a
waltzed across the road on his hint
feet and fetched him cuff whicl
knocked him ten feet. Tom though
I'd got out thar without his seem me
and he was tickled to death as he ri
up and went fur the bier. We hear
him sayin':
"'Zeb White. | said yo' wasn't
man, but take it all back. didn'
believe yo'd stand up to me. and m
heart was nigh breakin'.'
II reckon Tom must hev bin hal
drunk not to know bar from a maj
but he thought 1t was me fur shor,
and he soon had surprise party o
hand. The bar didn't seem hankeriI
arter meat. but he did want sum ful
The bar knocked him down and role
him about dozen times, and he &c
many good lick In on the bar, br
at length the fout was over, and ToI
Smith was a whopped man. He no
Tered out that he'd got plenty, and
reckon 1t was the same with the b'a
as he suddenly made off into II
woods. When Tom got over bel
dazed he got up and said to me:
"'Zeb White, I'm a-beggin' Of yo
pardln. ! thought yo' was cowal
and dasn't stand up to me. but yo'N
whopped me I'm fair fout"
WAS he badly used up?" I asked ,
the story seemed to be finished.
"He hadn't skassly a bit o cloth
left on him." replied Zeb. "and he WI
bruises and bites and claw marks fro
head to heel. ! reckon he might b,
got well from them. but his heart WI
broke He knowed I was In po
health. and when he realized that he
bin whopped by sick man he took
his bed and died In two weeks. T
sent fur me the day he died. and {
hour befo' he breathcd his last
reached fur my hand and whispered:
"'Zeb White, | can't make out he
yo did II. but yo' dun made me holl
fur the first time In my life, and I
prayin' fur death TO cum. I've kind
thought yo' might hev had buzzsa'
fastened to yo'r hands and feet. b
that wouldn't be agin yo.' and ! be
no Srudge. Goodby, Zeb. | hope
meet yo' In the tother land and h
another fout to see who ar the bs
man."