The Cordova daily times., 1915-01-11

know they were skinned but salve their respective consciences by the thought that is was for a good cause But they are not allowed to forget it. The next issue of their paper, if 1t hap. ! pens to be in tank town--it does not happen in cities-not only recalls recollections of the affair but "rubs it in" somewhat as follows:
 "In behalf of the Amalgamated Daughters this paper Is requested to thank Bob High for donating fifty pounds of ice for their entertainment last Tuesday night, the K Y. z. com pany for the loan of half dozen chairs. Colonel B'Gosh for two flags and motto Love Oneanother," Mary Anne Kehoe for keeping the parsons kid so his wife could be present, Mrs. McNoodle for the loan of three tea cloths. all who so kindly donated cakes pies, doughnuts and cheese straws, Mrs. Benzine for her delicious homemade candy. the Misses Baker for brown bread and baked beans, the Alphabeti- cal stores for fruit, Captain Whaler for mixed candy and hardtack, those who sang, play, acclaimed and read, Elder Jones for taking tickets at the door, Deacon McLennan for presiding as chairman, all those who so nberally patronized the affair with their pres- ence and liberality and Jimmy the Rat for helping wash dishes at the of the affair which netted, the Amalgamated Daughters are pleased to announce the neat sum of $26.15.'
 The week following usually brings forth something lnke this: "In thank ing those who so kindly, generously and whole-heartedly assisted at their entertainment two weeks ago the Am algated Daughters neglected to men, ton Miss Mehala Jennings who gener- ously loaned them her coffee pot and two dish towels The oversight is greatly regretted and is most cherfully corrected. Miss Mehala is one of the best workers connected with Amazing Grace Church"
 Is + any wonder the average news paper man is a pessimist, cynic and a crank? Nine times in every ten he is asked to the write the Card of Thanks" a list of those to be thanked being furnished him. He supplies the necessary "mush" and if someone. as in the case of Mehala Jennings, is over looked, he is blamed for being careless. Or "He did it on purpose-the mean thing"
 Now, in all candor and with a heart bubbling with generosity for the read ing public. the Stroller implores with tremor in his voice and tears in his eyes that he be not asked during the year 1915 to write any Cards of Thanks" Resolve to cut out Cards of Thanks" Let all other New Years resolution go but one. Make it and the Stroller will assist you in keeping 1t. If you break 1t, ,t wont be his fault. The Stroller hopes to live a more exemplary life henceforth. but he cant do it and write Cards of Thanks" If the Amalgamated
 ''s'''NiS VI "ai muButleHe are m trouble, they are at liberty to weep out their sorrows on the Stroller's shouI- der. If they give an entertainment for the benefit of the church, the Strorer will be present even if he has to steal the price. He hereby resolves to SUD- port any and all skin games that are pulled off, but if you would not lessen his chances for blessed immortality beyond the grave, don't please don't. ask him to jeopardize the intersts of his immortal soul by writing Cards of Thanks"
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