Omaha daily bee., 1915-05-04
HUMOU FLOWS IN CONGRESS-
Often Proves an Effective Weapon
in Routing Political oppO-
nents.
SPEAKER CLARK GIVES SAMPLE

stunted the groWth Of the Zenith CITY
Of the unsslted Seas" for twenty years
and gave himself fame throughout the
English speaking world. Knott declared
that after HIS Duluth and Pennsylvania
avenue speeches he never could induce
congress 20 take him seriously. and that
those two famous achievements Of hts ~
humorist wrecked his reputation as A
lswyer My own opinion IL that The anne
that the genial ex-atttrney GENERAL o.
Missouri and ex-governor Of Kentucky
won ss a humorist richly compensated
him for Whatever reputation he may have
lost as a lawyer. In his old age the splen-
did city OF Duluth heaped Goals OF fire
on his head by swing him 3 magnificent
banquet. a compliment that he enjoyed
immensely.
People who assert Dramatically that
humor does not pay In politics should
study the career 81 PRIV ate John" Alion.
In the first place. he ioked himself into
congress- He was running seainst the
sitting member. an ex-confederate generat
OF ability and ronown. They had whit
the newspapers were pleased to dignity
az joint discussion" The general led
of with hair-rnisins heart-rendine nc
count OF the hardshlps he had undergone
when he was in the army; he described
IN particular HIS suffering on a terribly
cold night in the Tennessee mountains.
Allen replied in this manner;
Yes. fellow citizens ] remember well
the hardships Of army iife. remember
with painful distinctness the sufferinRs
on the extremely cold night Of which the
general speaks 30 eioquently and patheti-
cally; and what fixed the horrors Of that
night forever In my memory II the fact
thst the general slept soundly and snusty
tucked up IN HE blsngets IN his tent.
while !. as . private soldier. vas nearly
frozen 70 death mounting guard in front
~ the generals tent Nov I have q fair
proposition ell you fellows who wero
genersls vote for him. and aii who were
privates vote for me-
The audience shouted with delight. took
Allen a. his word. sent him 10 Washing
tor. and kept him there until he toiun-
tarIly retired
sohn AIleR'a Methods.
n Joking never pays end humorists have
no Influence in congress. mark how p1sin
tale will put down the "solemneholists.'
Hero e what ssw John Allen DO !
saw him in ten minutes Joke the house
into such happy frame 81 mind that.
with only two or three dissentins voices.
and those we're feeble with esoked laugh
ter. II voted 20 give 2s.oto acres Of land
10 endow a girls school in Mississippi
Judge cuiboraon said privately that the
land was worth tz5o.coo: but the judge's
lat sides shook with Fiee as he voted for
Aliens school ] shall never forget a
ssntenee o. two of that speech. and they
are only samples OF the whole eddrefs.
'Gensiemen.v said. Attn this school
IL kept up for the btnefit Of q act Of the
iovelsest female Girls that the world ever
saw" The peroratlon was particularly
Eood. and had init the flavor OF an ex-
horsation At an old-fashioned camp meet
ing Here II iss mir. speaker this city
has been entertained for the last week or
two by the womans council who are
earnestly striying for tho proper rscog
milton 81 their sex. and do not believe
there Is member OF this house who Il
base enough 10 say no 20 this PROPOSE
ton II such there BE- let him 30 oar
from here scofncd b woman, ahunnnd by
man and lashed BY his own conscience.
Gentl6uaen. thlf congress h about 70 ex-
pife Many o. you are about 70 retire
from public life. Some Of you are a little
short on mensorious deeds here. give
you this chance to do this gracious thing
and 70 crown your careers with . vote in
favor Of this proposition, which viii make
you rot only proud Of yourselves. but
earn for you the plapdlts Of we'll dene
from the American people Mr.. Epeaker
some OF the members may want 20 know
where this institute . heated II Is 10
tho beautiful city Of Columbus, on the
banks OF The Tomblshee river; but 10
make Il morn definite. Il 10 about seventy
miles south Of Tgpo,o. and. OF course.
YOU ali know where Tupelo Il,
A Teniag stroke.
Alien made one Of his finest strokes az
humor 10 his first speech In the house.
AZ certain times In the house no one may
speak except by unanimous consent ON
one such occasion Allen wished 70 make
a speech on inprovsns the Tofnoisese
river. some member peevishiy objected.
whereupon Allen said. with tears In his
voice. AIR. Speaker u cannot secure
permission 10 SPEAK. ask leave 20 print
= spsach IN the Congressional Record
scattering the words laughter and az
piause through Il where they viii DO the
most good" IT was such paipable and
happy hit at fiagrent abuse that u put
every one into a sood humor The OBJ
jector withdrew his objection. ana Allen
made his speech.
He closed with thls astonishing aeclA-
ration: And now. Mr.. speaker. hayins
completely answered all the arguments
Of my opponents. viii retire 20 the
cloakroom TO receive the congratulations
Of aaTnlring ffiehds'--a performance that
he has been repeating ever since
Hon. John L. Wilson OF the state OF
Washington. who served In both house
ana senate. sometimes dropped into
huTnor. as sllar wesg occasionally
dropped into poetry. lie was very
bright man. energetic. irritable. btllieer-
ent; and he was no respecter Of persona
To puncturc solemn and pompogs pre-
tence was one Of his delights. After be-
ms the stormy petrol Of the house for
ak years he settled down into the solemn
life OF . senator
One day 1 asked him. John how do
you ike the senator
With a wan smile he replied There
IL some sort Of sopofifie influence over
there that is absent from the house. but
am getting 20 like it."-Champ Clark,
in Youths Companion.
SAL ESMAN FINDS He HAS