The West Virginian. [volume] (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1914-1974, 1915-11-18
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:si4 BY RED.
BY RED.

The average heart bleeds for. the
poor Fairmont autoist now that Mad
son street Is torn up at the Main
street intersection. It is in such
shape that it's hard for a car to turn
the corner at a speed faster than 40
miles an hour. q.
The Statement that 90 out OF every
100 men carrying suit-cases into sWest
Virginia have; liquor In them (the
suit cases. lis entirely out Of the
question. Tie liquor detectives evil
IDENTIFY missed the Tooth fellow. They
should at least give poor old West
Virginia a clean record and make the
percentage 100 out 100. re ;ig
Guess its pretty hard Shedding get
ting letters these days with all the
post Office cl Jerks gone to help the
Allies: No use writing any letters
70 the chest little girl In the world''
for Q, while. E 8ss y s5F,s.,, Il
wonder what Brand 1T was, that
caused the undolng Of the postmaster
at present located in tile U. S. O.
at Fairmont? Il "A Sssts,
Some players of the Normal school
football eleven have decided to wear
tmustasches for the winter and the
new hirsute adornment may be seen
at; the South Side Park Saturday.
Likely as not, some OF those w sley.
an birds are liable to take 81 hatrsslipi
or two with them; when they return
to the swilds of Upshur.
From our opinion OF TIL. Charles.
ton water, those editorials condemn;
ing the Water Company OF the capt
'tal9should be banned lin this state as.
advertisements coming under the
iYostS law. 4;
The Baltimore and Ohio must be!
preparing for the football game here!
Day. Four tracks be-;
tween here and Wheeling should be
walking room for quite a crowd re-
turning home toward dusk. i, i,
. = & e ~ K IA x ~
y When Hi Jasper the new one eyed
pitcher Of the Cardinals come to bat
and some one shouts You've got yer
eye on 1t, Kid II ma be possible
that HI will grab! the ball to look
for the missing optic: 4
Dear Irene:
q IL that Xmas present doesn,t come
soon you will have to walt until some
one returns to the post office to take
1t out OF the 8parcel. post box. q &
The washington Post prints a dis;
patch from Hudson, s. ., which
states that a man was being gored to
death by a bull when a rescuers came!
along in an auto and repeatedly
charged 3theabull, with the car, finally,
driving him OF / New use for the sjit:
iney=drivlng of the bull Necessity.
yisSthe mother OF invention campaign
time will be with us soon.
e Z = s. ~
Now that the Itrupps have given;
ls5,00o,000 to the Kaiser as a relief
ituuu NluF k,luiuISui sulAleEsf dliu elVl = bhst
wives and children Of dead sold iers,I
be "a good idea for some OF
the United States munitions factor:
les to scrape a Thousand or two to-,
lgether and send IL to France and Brit.
ain 4
IL President w ilson, William G. Nc
sAdoo, set al, decide to place "a stamp.
on all back cheques, and IL the re-
iceiyer OF the check must pay for the
stamp, there Is one thing certain, and
that Isl, weBwills have Ito borrow money
each week to buy the stamp that re:
leases the salary check.
Germans. take 1913 Serbs, 1915
Russians dime.
Germany needs Doc Wiley to fnyess
ttigate the foods and drugs In that
country.
DON'T imagine Serbs and Russians
go good with Teuton beer
q
For the past few days policeman
iPitzer and Chief Harr have been
Ipracticing the snake dance in the
council chamber preparatory 10 ven.
thtrinr nm fhe sfrepfe herp Thanks.