The star-independent. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1904-1917, 1915-04-19
CHAPTER I.

AM Qu1te sure II was my Uncle
Rllas who said that l was a fool
II memory serves me well he re-
lieved himself OF that conviction
In the presence OF my mother-whose
brother he was-at time when | was
least competent TO acknowledge bis
wisdom and most arrogant in assert.
ing my own was freshman In
college, a fnct--or condition perhaps
which should serve as an excuse for
both OF US. possessed another uncle,
incidentally, and while | am now con.
vinced that he must have felt as Uncle
Rilas did about IL. he was one of those
who suffer in silence
assume. therefore. that 1t was Uncle
Rilas who orally convicted me. an as
sumption justified to some extent by
putting two and two together, after
the poor old gentleman was laid away
for his long sleep. He had been very
emphatic In his belief that a fool and
his money are soon parted. Up to the
time of his death | had been In no
way qualified to dispute this ancient
theory. In theory. no doubt, l was
the kind OF fool he referred to, but In
practice was quite an untried novice.
1t Is very hard for even fool to part
with something be hasn't got. Not
until Uncle Rilas died and left me all
OF his money was able to demon
strate that dead men and fools part
with 1t.
In any event Uncle Rilas did not
leave me his money until my freshmen
days were far behind me. wherein
lies the solace that he may have out.
grown an opinion while was going
through the same process. At twenty.
three ] confessed that all freshmen
were insufferable and Immediately aft.
erward took my degree and went out
into the world to convince it that SEN
iors are by no means adolescent.
My uncle's original estimate Of me
as freshman, Of course-was uttered
when ! at the age of eighteen picked
out my walk in life. so to speak. After
considering everything decided to be
q literary mana novelist or a play
wright, | hadn't much of a choice be
tween the two. or perhaps journalist
Being journalist, of course. was pre-
tminary, sort OF makeshift. At any
rate was going to be writer MY
Uncle Rilas. hard headed customer.
who had read Scott as a boy and the
Wall Street News as a man without
being misled by either. was scornful
He said that would outgrow 1t; there
was some consolation In that. He even
admitted that when he was seventeen
be wanted to be an actor. There you
arei said he.
4 argued that novelists make a great
deal Of money and playwrights. too.
for that matter. He said in reply that
an ordinarily vigorous washerwoman
could make more money than the aver
age novelist, and she always had a
stocking without a hole to keep it in.
which was more to the point
Now that I come 70 think Of It, 1t
was Uncle Rilas who oracularly pre-
Judged me and NOT Uncle John, who
was by way Of being sort of literary
chap himself and therefore iamentably
unqualified to guide me In any course
whatsoever, especially as he had all he
could do to keep his own wolf at bay
without encouraging mine and who be-
sides teaching good English loved It
wisely and too well
My mother felt In her heart that
ought to be doctor or preacher. but
she wasn't mean. She was positive
could succeed os a writer IL | set my
mind to It. She was also sure that I
could be president of the United States
Or perhaps oven a bishop. We were
EpiscOpaliaDA
When I WIS twenty.seven my first
short story appeared in magazine cf
considerable weight, due to its adver-
fising pages, but my Uncle RiIas didn't
read 1t until had convinced him that
the honorarium amounted to $500
Even then | was obliged to promise
him q glimpse OF the clock when /
got It
In course of time my first novel ap-
peared. 1t was a love story. Uncle
Rilas read the first Eve chapters and
then skipped over to the last page.
Then he began 1t all over again and
sat up nearly all night to finish 1t. The
next day he called It trash" but In
vited me to have luncheon with him