The Birmingham age-herald., 1915-06-17
THE CITY OF DREADFUL NOISE

from the Louisville Herald.
 Now and then a great idea bursts full- l fledged from the palpitating brain of the seething west, and when it isn't polti- cal idea, we receive it with an open mind I and grateful heart. Such a one has just been born in Chicago, where the very | latest wrinkle in civic uplift is sug | gestion that mikmen be compelled to
 wear rubber soled shoes. Ten thousand | thousand fretful incomniacs some day
 will rear monument of solid gold to the genius who conceived this thought Doubtless, 1t came to him, or her, on the inspirational wings of early morn. along about 4:30 or o'clock, as he, or she, lay tossing in a sleepless bed and listened to the milkman. herald of dis cordant day, come merrily down the :treet upon his fiendish errand. How blithely he whistles a jaunty tune as his hob
 nailed boots play an excrueiating accom-
 panment upon the granolithic sidewalk.
 How joyously he stops his obedient horse with a glad "Whoa," '"Whoai" iuggles the bottles of milk and cream, slams the side gate, sings snatch or two from the latest popular song, and then goes off to where the next victims reside, leaving
 behind him a trail of dangling nerves and fractured tempers. By all means com pei milkmen to wear rubber-soled shoes
 Boston Transcript.
 If not, why not? Give your reason and draw a plan.
 But why be so choosative? Why. in the City of Dreadful Noise visit the wrath o,,J without offense on the milkman only?
 There schould be silences on the truck yendors-Stror-r-r- bar-ies with every con- cevable infection in every known Key of exhortation and invitation ana roga-
 tion; on those who peddle newspapers, plain and extra, of which we always have
 too much and too many; on such as love to swing on creaky gates of mornings
 swapping the news and views of the
 neighborhood; on predatory fire depart- ment, and those who love the solo of
 the warning horn, blaring the path to eternity.
 They order these matters so much more wisely in Germany There, among the things that are "Verboten," is useless din You may not ply your trade, and be a nuisance. You may not indulge in
 riot of changing bells because folk eat fish on Friday. You would better not take he world into your confidence in a whisper that can be heard from Dan to Beer sheba, and beyond. Beware how your mechanical piano pounds out the Anvil Chorus or the nolsiest Hungarian <. m- phony after curfew. How gladly would CI.a it, ings for sleep, in that land where the babies are muffled by Maxim and Q pe- destrian world slips around in feit g ip- pers
 Those of us who have breakfast in . ed blessed company, believe us; who are weak and defenseless in the early morn who never pass the time of day before
 the sun is high; who are doubtful about the framework of society when the wlnd is in the east who love quiet streer and a quiet life and a quiet smoke, ere satis- fled that a perfect peace would be in the intrest of all the citizens because i. would benefit us.
 | No more sumptuary laws, they tell us 1 Bah! Piffle Go tell that to M-. Bryan I or MT Hobson or the Nicotine so- ciety. This is not a sumptuary regala- 1 tion, but sense that we invoke.
 Why a Rang des Vaches to announce | the milk? The Transcript has the right of it. Why the imperious piping of the postman? No good ever came out of writ | ing letters, we have heard. Why must we be brought familiar with street noises
 near and distant. penetrating and persist l ent, vulgar and voluble?
 l Dogs we can stand and cats we have l to. but humans-bipeds with lungs and no other recommendation whatsmeever. Why turn them loose on a mitutinal world to warp the Christian and conirite mood that comes with a repentant norn dark and gray in proportion as the n.cht with it's doch and it's doris" was rosy? | j. Caesar of Rome desired men around | him that were fat. and slept O nights l The other kind is wakeful and dangerous | We have been pestient wakeful since the early spring green things began to walk | the early street The Scot has sense | Does he not sing
 l It's good to get up in the morning, l But-it's better to lie in bed?