New Britain herald., 1914-08-15

IIlllu the uncertainty that I1OIASA is indifferent to his wishes? Or shall we teach him as early as possible that first refusal is final, and let It go at that?
 The child is placed in an environ ment wherein most things tempt his curiosity or his instinct to "do some thing or try something" with them; and wherein, at the same time, most of these things must not be touched or handled. When Janet wishes to play with the baby as doll, she must be told firmly that 1t is out of the question. In the meanwhile, how ever, she must have something to do, and the person in charge must find the opportunity for her. We must be on our guard, however, against suggesting that playing with the tea set or stringing beads is just as good as playing with the baby, or that the new activity will do in stead of the desired one. The atti- tude to assume Is this: We know she wanted to play with the baby as a doll; but that Is simply impossible. she must therefore find something else to interest herself or to occupy her idle energies.
 This may seem to many mothers like quibbling. But we must remem- Der that the child is very keen to de- tect any uncertainty, any tendency to yield on the part of those with whom he has to deal. If anything in your voice or in your manner remotely suggests that you are bargaining with the child, that you are offering compromise, you lose, even though you may succeed in saving the baby from the ruthless hands of Janet.
 Asks for Things He Does Not Want.
 There are some children who ask for things that they do not care very much about, but they do care very much if their requests are denied. A child will sometimes cry when de- nied his request, and keep on crying until he has actually forgotten what it was that he wanted. He has a vague feeling of dissatisfaction, a feeling that things are not just right. What he needs Is something to do, something that will interest him and drive away that uncomfortable feel ing. When you suggest an activity to a child in this state, you are not offering a substitute for that which he asked to have: you are substituting for the misery whose cause he him self does not know an opportunity to be active and happy. Consider First Rather Than Concede
 Later.
 We must be clear in our own minds as to what kinds of objects and what kinds of activities we are to allow the children. When a new question comes up, it is better to 5 41; decision. When Johnnie asks wheth- CT he may go out again, you are tempted to say no. because it's, so near dinner time. He points out that there is still quarter of an hour ot golden time; you concede to the logic ! of figures and he goes. How much better to consider at once how much time there is, and grant his request reasonably then, instead of making a concession under his pressure!
 Warning Might Precede Final Com-
 mand
 Three little girls are bathing in 1 lake. The mother, on the shore, 1 looks at her watch and calls to her l children to come out of the water. It's so pleasant in the water: mayn't 1 we stay just a little longer? The l mother yields five minutes, and at | once the bargaining begins. ending in | a compromise of ten minutes. Now, the mother ought either to have made ] her children learn that when she | calls 1t Is time to come; or she l should have learned that her children | do not come when they are called. ] On top of this she should make up i, her mind just how much longer IL would be really proper for the girls to | stay in the water, and give them mo- tice of the time at their disposal; and 1 this should be in the form of an ultimatum. permitting of no exten- sion or compromise of any kind.
 We all know that it is not well for ]