davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Clio messenger., 1914-11-27
TWO WAYS TO LOOK AT IT
If Customer Was in Luck in Getting
Hat to Fit Him, How About the
Shop Keeper?

After playing a matinee perform
ance recently in Omaha, relates a
popular actor, l discovered my hat
was missing from my dressing room.
This was really a serious loss, for,
being possessed of an exceptionally
large head, it is not unusually neces-
sary for me to visit every hat shop in
the town before l can find hat to fit.
Finally, after lot of effort and deter
mination, l found hat shop where
they had just one hat that would fit
me. inquired the price of it, and the
shop keeper answered with an en-
couraging smile that it was five dol
lars. 1t struck me that the hat wasn't
worth that, being somewhat out of
date, offered him two and a half. -
Two and a half!"h he exclaimed,
struggling his shoulders. "Why, you
ought to be mighty glad to get that
even for five dollars. Where will you
be able to find a hat large enough to
fit your head?"
THAT may be true," l answered,
but where will you be able to find a
head large enough to fit your hat?"
got the hat for two and half
The Clio messenger., 1914-11-27

whereas. as a matter OF fact. the medi-
cine business is notor.ously difficult,
and, where there has been one success
at it. there have been hundred fail
ures. Any medicine which has no
merit cannot live, because persons
who are duped into buying it once will
not buy 1t again, and the profit from
advertising a medicine can only come
from repeat sales to the same, salts
fled people. Therefore. any medicine
which has been on the market for a
tised, must have merit behind it to ac-
count for its success.
In conclusion Mr.. Balliett declared
that no newspaper is doing justice to
its readers in the matter of medical
or other advertising, unless 1t investi-
gates, not only the wording of the ad-
.vertisement ofered for publication,
but the merits Of the article adver-
tised. He pointed out that the few
newspapers who have been deluded
into the policy of barring out medical
advertising have adopted this general
policy. rather than to form an inves-
tigation bureau or this kind which
could, In a constructive and useful ef-
fort, investigate and decide what is
a good product and what is fraud.
in not only the medicine business, but
in every other business which adver-
tises it's wares to the public.
The audience seemed to agree with
Mr.. Balliett's ideas on the subject and
the chairman decided the question at
issue in his favor
The Clio messenger., 1914-11-27
Apples Not Sprayed.

cred too soon, and this Is situation
that the orchardist cannot always
help. The fruit must be gathered be-
fore the storms come or there will be
great loss. IL the crop Is large the
work must begin early unless help is
abundant enough to care for it in a
limited period. However, color is the
thing to strive for and 1t may some
times pay to take a little risk in wait
ing for more maturity. l feel that
much can be done in this way to i'm
prove the selling qualities of apples.
The grower who has a few of the
standard kinds following each other
in the natural order of ripening has
an advantage; he has more extend
ed picking season.
/ make a close study Of the exact
time of maturity of the various kinds
and aim to gather each kind as near
ly as possible at this precise period.
The Clio messenger., 1914-11-27
st. SImon's Skeleton.

The duke Of Portland has presented
to the British Museum of Natural His
tory the skeleton of the famous race
horse st. Simon. till now preserved al
Welbeck, and it will eventually be ex
-hibited beside the skeleton of st. 81
mons son, Persimmons, now shown-in
the museum. 1t is of interest to note
that the first four horses in the recent
Derby were all descendants of st. 81
mon. Other famous racehorses oil
which the skulls and. In some In
stances, the skeletons are preserved in
the museum are Stockwell. Ormonde
Bend-Or. Royal Hampton and Dono
van.
The Clio messenger., 1914-11-27
HAD CEASED TO BOTHER HIM
SeIf-Possessed Young Person Took
Extreme Measures With Head
gear That Offended Him.

There is a certain young woman OF
Brooklyn who possesses a hat Of which
she is inordinately proud. It was a
small hat originally, but the owner
had increased its proportions matert
ly by the addition of willow plumes
attached to wire backbones.
Now, she wore this hat to music
festival not long ago, and she felt
very much dressed up. AS she leaned
back gracefully and complacently in
her chair, she felt a gentle tugging at
the aforesaid hat from behind.
So she turned and said to a self
possessed young man In her rear:
Does my hat bother you?"
mot at all" said the young man.
She Of the hat thought it over for a
while. It occurred to her that per-
haps she had been -ungracious. Ac-
cordingly she turned again, this time
with this query:
Perhaps the plumes interfere with
your view of the stage?
"At first they did," confessed the
self-possessed young person, "but
bent 'em down."
The Clio messenger., 1914-11-27
DEFENDS POPULAR REMEDIES
Speaker Says Newspapers Should In
vestigate Merits Of Medicines Be-
fore Barring Advertisements.

That an organized attempt has been
made to blacken the reputation of the
popular family remedies of this coun-
try, and to mislead the newspaper
publishers into rejecting the adver-
tfsing OF such medicines, was the
charge made by Carl J. Balliett, OF
Buffalo, N. Y, at the convention of the
Advertising Affiliation at Detroit.
Mr.. Balliett Is a director of the Pro-
prietary Association of America, which
includes in its membership two hun
dred firms which make the popular
prepared medicines of America.
Mr. Balliett pointed out that 1t Is
the duty of the newspaper publisher
to refuse the advertising of any fake
or fraudulent medicine, just as 1t Is
his duty to refuse any fake or fraudu-
lent advertising, but it is not right to
shut down on all medical advertising
because there have been some takers,
any more than it would be right to
refuse to publish all department store
advertising because certain stores
have made practice of lying about
bargain sales.
Disease and death are mysteries.
People who are perfectly well are
skeptical. They laugh at the time
worn patent medicine joke. just as
they laugh again and again over the
many variations Of the operation joke
The operation was a success but
the patient died" This so-called hui
NOR mas perhaps hurt the medicine
business with well people, but when
the hitherto healthy man feels Sc
we're pain or illness, he Immediately
wants medicine, and will bless the
cure whether 1t be at the hands Of a
regular doctor, homeopath, an osteo-
path, Christian Scientist or patent
medicine. There is nothing more
deadly than disease; nothing more
honorable than to cure It.
Mr.. Ballfett refuted the idea sought
70 be spread about that patent medi-
clnes are unpopular by showing that
from 1900 to 1912 the amount of pre-.
pared medicines consumed in America
Increased from $1O0,000,000 to $780,
100000 annually. He showed that, al.
though the American Medical Associ-
alton Is trying as an organization to
exterminate so-called patent medi-
cines. the family DOCTOR individually,
is not fighting them but prescribing
them. He estimated that 400 of the
prescriptions written by doctors today
include proprietary medicines.
The writings of DR.. Harvey w. WI
ley, he said, have also aimed to de-
stroy confidence in proprietary medi-
cines; but that DR.. Wiley's ideas are
not infallible is shown by cases whero
his analyses were entirely wrong. Mr..
Balliett mentioned case where, with
all the power of the Government, he
fought a preparation as being danger
GUS to health, and was ingloriously
walloped.
There has been spread the idea that
a clever faker can mix a few useless
ingredients and, by smart advertising,
sell tons Of ii and win sudden wealth;
The Clio messenger., 1914-11-27
Gamma Outfit Essential.

Every owner of fruit orchard, par.
ticularly peach orchard. no matter
whether large or small, should have
canning outfit. Village and city
residents are always glad to buy
peaches ready canned at high prices.
The Clio messenger., 1914-11-27
Shadowinq a Shadow.

A very stout old lady. going through
the park on a very hot day, became
aware that she was being followed by
a tramp.
What do you mean by following
me In this manner?" she Indignantly
demanded. The tramp skunk back a
little, but when the stout lady re-
sumed her walk he again took up
his position directly behind her.
"See here!" she exclaimed, angrily,
IF you don't go away shall call a
policeman"
For heavens sake, kind lady,"
urged the tramp, looking at her ap-
pealingly, have mercy and don't call
a policeman. You're the only shady
spot in the whole park. k."-Harper's
Magazine.
The Clio messenger., 1914-11-27
Care In HandIlno Apples.

The degree of care it will pay you
to exercise in handling your apples
will be determined largely by the
grade of fruit you are putting on the
market and the care with which you
guard your reputation as fancy fruit
producer.
The Clio messenger., 1914-11-27
HARD TASK FOR 0RCHARDISI
Problem Of Growing FineIy-coIored
Apples for Market Is Difficult
Effects Of Spraying.
fBy w. 8. TREAToR.l

One OF the greatest problems con
fronting the apple grower is how to
get color in his fruit; where the or
chard is cultivated color is too dull.
We may some day know more about
1t. ! find that few kinds will color
well naturally when under tillage. The
Jonathan is an eminent example. With
Baldwin and most other kinds the
color remains dull unless they hang
The Clio messenger., 1914-11-27

A woman's idea of economy is to
trade some old thing she needs for
some new thing she has no earthly
use for.
The Clio messenger., 1914-11-27
Sure, Mawruss!

Credit Man-No, We can't sell you
those goods on four months time.
Isaacs-Vy not? / gifts you my
note.
Credit Man-But your notes do not
sell on the street.
Isaacs-Mine gracious no; or 1 would
go home and make notes instead OF
clothing.-Boston Transcript.
The Clio messenger., 1914-11-27

It's a homely girf that a photogra-
pher cannot pose to look pretty Des-
eret News.
The Clio messenger., 1914-11-27

Aches and pains would not be so
bad II they didn't get busy at the
wrong time and in the wrong place.
The Clio messenger., 1914-11-27
Had No objection.

Callow Youth-Can I have thi
dance?
Proud Beauty-Why, certainly.
don't want 1t.
The Clio messenger., 1914-11-27
OF Like Nature,

what do you think of this jewel
press story?"
Its a gen."
The Clio messenger., 1914-11-27

important 10 Mothere
Examine carefully every bottle OF
CASTORIA, q safe and sure remedy for
infants and children, and see that 1t
The Clio messenger., 1914-11-27
Mixed Metaphor.

Mixed Metaphor.
"Why do you want to run an auto
ITO keep in the swim"
The Clio messenger., 1914-11-27

Red Cross Ball Blue makes the laundress
happy, makes clothes winter than snow.
All good grocers. Adv.
The Clio messenger., 1914-11-27
Put That Pain to Use

AS to Doan's Kidney Pills, read the
following enthusiastic endorsement by
one who has tested them.
The day book., 1914-12-30

to drink, and all was mirth and gay
ETY., when in comes a tall guy and a
swell-loeking dame land sits down at
a table in corner
well, you see, the plot was that
they was to be ketched by the lady's
husbend, who prances in with pri-
vate detecktiff
so after the two of them had been
eating about minnits, two fellers
jumps in the door, and one of them
hollers to the other
there is the man who stole my
wife! t
whareupon guys crawled under
tables, one jumped out of a winder,
and 2 tried to cline up into the coop
where the band was playing
and when they got them guys back
into their ehares, and told them it was
moving pickchers, that didend seem
to help none at all
they just said crate snaiks, let me
out of this, or words to that effect,
and paid their checks and grabbed
their danes and beat it
don't beleave there is going to be
no more movies taken in RESTRAINTS
along the CRATE white way, it amt
good for bisniss
O-o- ."
The day book., 1914-12-30
LlRERTY

A small boy went up, to the soda
water clerk and said:
"Give me ptomaine cocktail"
whats that?"
81 want a ptomaine cocktail
That's new one on me-. Explain
what it is"
''WeIl, I've just escaped from my
home and l can do what like. Now,
every time l have seen, anything I
particularly liked, my mother would
say, No, you can't, have that. It's
got ptomainestin it., And SO I want
a ptomaine cocktail, with all the pto-
maines you can squeeze in. Pm out
for the time of my Ife."-Lfe.
-O--O-
CONVICTED
Business Man to AppIicant-"Don't
tell me you're a college graduate!
Why, this letter of yours hasn't sin
gle misspelled word in it!"-Ltfe.
The day book., 1914-12-30
0hllny,
GWHN1x

m. y.-say. maby a movin pickcher
outfit dident pritty near put one of
our best-knoWn lobster palaces on
the bum .
H the feller that keeps it is a. good
zfnatured guy, and he likes to have
tsumthing doing around his eating
house ,.. a
so when the movie man come along
and says, can we take pickcher in
here, sum evening. he ansers, sure
mike, come right along and make
yourselves to home
so last night they done it
the restaurant was all full of ladys
and gentlemen, and evryboddy was
having sumthing to eat and sumthing
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-11-19
WALSH LAUDS
WISCONSIN
Best State Government in Union
Says Massachusetts Gov
Grn0T.
Chicago Herald, Nov. is.

Chicago Herald, Nov. IS.
About the best state government
in the Union is that of Wisconsin, .
said Governor David |. Walsh of
Massac husetts at the Blackstone Ho-
tel last night.
Governor Walsh stopped in Chica.-
go On his return to Boston from the
meeting of governors at Madison.
The state takes better care of
the individual than other state in
the Union" he asserted. "And, I
suppose aus a consequence there is
more interest in government among
the people of the state than there is
anywhere else.
Il obtained many suggestions, from
Wisconsin that will help Massacus--
etts if l ann able to carry them out.
How the state cares for its prison
ers, it's insane and the Individual cit
izen is a lesson for many another
state to follow"
Governor Walsh said he was sat
isfied with the results of the re-
cent election and that he believed
the Democrats would retain suffici--
ent control in Congress to carry
out the policies of President. Will
son.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-11-19

think too much that he has climbed
in knowledge and experience far a.
boYe the common herd.
Unless a college boy earns his own
way, life seems too easy to him. He
has no sense OF the mountainous OBJ
sta,cles that fence the path 10 success
Once on the outside with his dipIo-
ma in his pocket, he finds that he
must start even with the street gam
in, and probably with less knowledge
Of human nature than the latter pos
sesses
OF course two years is an all too
brief period for what is called a lib
eraI education. The vast range of
human experience can be touched up
on in four years only in sketchy
way.
But tens OF thousands of young
men who now quit in the High schoo
would feel like taking astwO years
| college, if such could be arranged
with special reference to their needs
| 1t would add to the breadth, liberal,
! ity, and intelligence of the business
| community. Young men then would
not start their life work with such
handicap of age. And the subtitle
enerYation that so often follows from
the pleasure-seeking side of college
life would have had less effect Oh
the habits and points Of view Of the
| two year men.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-11-19
OVER tOO,OOG,OOO
POPULATION j. s.
QuadrupIing of People and Vast
Growth of Wealth in so Years
Told Officially.

WASHINGTON, Nov. 1.-THE pop
ulation Of the United States today is
more than 100, 900 900 AID the mo-
ney in circulation totals, $3,419, 600
OO0 while 1000 600 of the thrifty
inhabitants have 81 1875 600, 90 in the
savings banks.
Such is the announcement made
Friday Afternoon by the bureau OF
foreign and domestic commerce in
the Department of Commerce. The
pamphlet issued by the bureau is en-,
titled, Statistical Record of Prog
ress Of the United States, -800-1914."
1t gives a 'half-century retrospect, >
and a clear perspective" of the ma
tons quadrupling of population and
multiplying a hundred fold of indus
trial values.
Since 1850 the population, then
% 900, 900, has more than QuadrupI-,
ed, ," says the bulletin Commerce
has grown from 1913, 900 900 to $4,--
259 100000 and the per capita value
Of exports from S1696 to $23.27.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-11-19
THE GOLDEN CORN CROP.

The final government report on
corn shows that the American farm
er will get a greater total of money
for his crop than ever before. Pro-
duction is trifle under the vaerage,
but the price is high.
Corn is the universal American
product It is produced in more
counties than any other one staple.
Many people think of it as a lazy
mans crop. They point to the indol--
ent Indians, who grew and thTived ,on
it for centuries before the pale-faced
invaded their slackly titled fields.
Yet the fact that the bulk of the
crop is raised on moderate sized
farms is significant. The shifting,
and more or less ignorant gang of
farm help on which the big wheat
farm or cotton plantation must de-
pend, do not uusally get the best re
suits on corn. It is a crop that re-
qufres close and thoughtful attention
Corn is a great democratic food
product and backyard staple for the
poor man. Countless families lived
through the earlier days, when white
flour was a luxury, on johnny cake,
hoe cake, hasty pudding, and othel
cookery from corn flour.
There is an old rustic yarn about
a father and mother who were called
away by illness Of a relative, leaving
a family of children at home. They
had left little food and less money
| in the house, but had a field of corn
When the old people came back, there
was no money in the house, but there
was a heap of corncobs in the back
yard, and the children were as fat
and rosy as pigs.
| Experts on corn culture are not
/ yet satisfied with the present corn
raising methods. They feel that grow
ers are too sure that the soil is mo-
being exhausted In rich corn country
farmers sometimes take stable ma
nure and dump it into holes in the
roads, or anything to get rid of it.
Even the richest corn field is not g
gold mine Something ought to be
put back.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-11-19
PLAINFIELD.

Mrs John Pagatch, of Hancock, a
former resident here, was in town
Saturday on business.
Mr.. and Mrs. c. o. GouIt were
guests of Mr.. and Mrs. Clarence EN-
mes at Grand Rapids Sunday. AT
PIover Mr.. and Mrs. Frank Alien
burg joined them and all visited
Grand Rapids.
M. n. Uavitt received news last
week from Merrill that his niece, Mrs
Clara Winneman, was very i'll, hav-,
ing had an operation in a hospital,
and was not improving rapidly. Mrs.
Winneman is well known here, haV-
ing visited here considerable.
Walter Schenck has moved from
the P Woman farm to the J. C.
WeltOn house.
Ben .Sutman expects to move from
the Earl Martin farm to "A Abb
bolts farm, this week.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-11-19
M'GOvERN ISSUES
HIS THANKSGIVING
DAY PROCLAMATION

MADISON, Wis, Nov. 16. - Gov.
McGovern has issued the following
Thanksgiving day proclamation:
las autumn draws to a close, it
becomes increasingly evident that
| the people of Wisconsin have been
especially favored this year by a gra-
cious Providence. Never before was
nature kinder Sunshine and rain in
proper succession and distribution asj
sured abundant crops. Good health
has blessed US. In sharp contrast to
the cataclysm of war that now de-
vastates all Europe, our people have
been at peace among themselves and
with the whole world. So We have
ample cause for gratitude and thanks
giving.
In grateful recognition of these
blessings and in conformity with the
proclamation of the president of the
United States, l, Francis E. Mccoy
ern, governor of the state of Wis.,
consin, do hereby designate and APP
point Thursday, the tWenty--sith day
Of November, nineteen hundred four
teen, as Thanksgiving day, and
earnestly recommend that the people
meet on that day in their accustomed
places of worship and there offer
thanks, with prayer and praise, to
God who has so aubndantIy prosper
ed US and so lovingly cared for us
throughout the year.
But while we as a people have
been so greatly favored, heart-render-
ing app calls for help come to us acros
the Atlantic. They tell of rich fields
and populous cities laid waste by
war; Of the ruin of millions of hap
Ply homes and the restitution of num-
berless widows and orphans. Here,
therefore, is a rare opportunity to
make the beautiful Thanksgiving sea
son memorable this year for works of
sympathy, benevoIence and practical
charity. Let us be neither tardy nor
ungenerous. Out of our abundance lib
eral contributions should at once be
made to relieve the distress of the
unfortunate and the helpless in the
war-ridden countries of the old world.
In testimony whereof, I have
hereunto set my hand and caused |
the great seal of the state of Wiscon- |
sin TO be affixed. Done at the CAPT |
tol, in the city of Madison, this thfr-
teenth day of November, in the year
of our Lord one thousand nine hun |
dred fourteen.
FRANCIS E. M'GOVER9.
Governor"
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-11-19
hay to Chicago last week.

hay to Chicago last week.
Carl Kronholm sold horse last
week to a party at Five Mile Creek.
The members of the Bethany
church will hold a Thanksgiving din
ner al the Herman Ludberg home on
Nov. 20, All are invited.
Mrs, Anna johnson visited friends
a the Rapids the latter part OF last
week.
Misses Berdena and Floyd Berg,
spent Sunday at the Loudly home at
Sherry.
Victor Lundstrum of Grand Rap
Ids, Mich, arrived here last week
and viii visit at the Carl Kronholm
home Tor d length of time
A number from here went down t.
Rudolph Sunday night TO take in the
moving picture show.
Mrs. Gust Heurcsion entertained
the Y. P. S. on Thursday night and
on Friday afternoon a few ladies en-
joyed an afternoon coffee with her.
An auto party came up from Ne
koosa on Sunday and spent the day
at the Whitman home
Mr.. and Mrs. VIM. Kronholm, o.
Merrill, are visiting at the home Of
the formers mother, Mrs. L.G. Kron
holm
Reuben Lndstrom left last week
for the north where he will be en-
ployed.
Mr. and Mrs Larkin ano sons art
here from Oshkosh, where they vii
mali their future home They are a
present staying with Mrs. Larkin
brother, L. Loudly.
Will Reisen and Henry Stublowsky
Of Elm Lake, spent Sunday at the
/ Anderson home
Prof Clark, of Grand Rapids, lee
tured at the school house in Dist. 4
on Thursday night.
Seth Whitman spent Sunday at
| Sherry.
Miss Ida Jacobson has returnet
home after a weeks visit at tn,
Kronholm home.
Mr.. and Mrs. VIM. Grassland spen
Sunday with the latter's sister,a Al
pin.
! Vim KroDcta1t ic having Some i'm
provements made on his house.
Seth Whitman is having neI
barn built. Gust and Ernest Andel
son have been helping him build it.
Miss Iona Larson, who is attend
ing school in your city, spent Satul
day and Sunday with home folks.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-11-19

Don't Delay Treating Your Cough
A slight cough often becomes seri-
GUS. Lungs get congested, Bronchial
Tubes fill with mucous. Your vital
ity is reduced. You need DR.. Bells
Pine-Tar-H Honey. 1t soothes your irri-
lated air passages, loosens mucous
and makes your system resist colds,
Give the Baby and Children DIR.
Bells ne-Tar-Honey. It's guaran-
iced to help them. Only 25cat your
druggist.