Evening star., 1914-04-26

{ If he kept dhrfnk on tn premises, but,
xcautf0ning fh' ktuE that 1t wud be as
much as his JOB .Va8 worth to have 1t
known. he conducted him into tn back
yard, opened tn cellar dure, an led him
down into TIL darkness. Thin he lighted
a candle, an, afther burrowin in pile
iv potatoes, projooced a bottle marked
Extract iv Vanilla" an told tn king to
take a pull at it. His majesty was very
ill tn mex day
Its hard FIR me to think iv timp-
rance navy. Somehow or other me idee
iv sea f1ghtin' an booze fghtin is SO
wound up together that there amt amy
romance in wan without tn other.
niver see a man-iv-war in me life but
tn brick wan they had at tn wurruld' s
me mind with tn sailors below broachin'
a cask iv rum an dancin' sailors horn.
pipe an tn officers on tn roof standin'
around long. table an dhrinkin Sweet
hearts an wives in a punch that wud
burn hole in tn deck If they spilled
amy iv 1t, which they didn't. ! thought
an admiral wud be disgraced If he wint
aboord befure he was loaded down to tn:
Plimsoll line. figured TIL -raison tn cap
tain paced th' quarther deck was because
he had set up, late tn night befure an
cudden't stand still.
"An' now I find that tn seamen don't
get anything to dhrink but tea an tn
officers has been subsistin' FIR years on a
! kind iv dhrink that was vinegar befure it
got sour. An'aven that has been cut out
be 4Josephus Daniels L wondher what
Jawn Paul Jones wud think If he wint
on wan iv thin foatin' masheen shops
with a lot iv- boys studyin' Fr-rinch in
wan part iv tn foundhry an tn officers
settin' around tn dinner table an sayin'
to each other: Don't touch that sasprilly,
Percy: it's corked.'
Sure there's nanny another old fellow
in other thrades thin tn sea wud be SUR
prised If he come back an found how
things has changed since TIL days whin
a gintleman was not a gintleman IL he
wasn't cross-eyed by siven o'clock ct
night. King Alcohol no longer rules tn
sea or tn land. Th' ladies have got that
binivolint oil dishpot on his knees beggin'
f'r mercy an they're sayin' to him. Did
ye have mercy on u.s.? an ARE gettin
ready to chop off his wicked OF head
Take drink. me boy, whether We need
it or not. Take it now. 1t may be ye'er
last. I used to laugh at tn pro-hybition-
lists; + used to laugh thin to scorn. But
laugh no more; they've got us on tn run.
1 wudden't be surprised at amy minyft II
had to turn this emporium into an ex-
change FIR women's wurruk. Whether ye
like it or not, in a few years there won't
be amy saloons to lure tn marrid man
firm his home, furnish guests Frs our
gr'reat asylums an jafls, an brighten up
TIL dark sthreets with their cheerful
glow. ] don't care, ! wudden't mind II
all tn liquor in tn wurruld was poored
into tn lake 1t wud make people pay
their wather tax with lighter heart
=
But what I'd like to know. is, whinl
all tn breweries an wine presses. ARE
shut. down, an tn pizened ivy fiourishes
ON tn rooms iy th magnificent distilleries
iv Peory. whats goin' to happenf This
here smoppin' up iv alcohol is a. sqdare;
thing an I can't make 1t out. I've been
sfudyin' fr. NANNY years an 1t looks to
me like a kind iv way men, have iv,
shakin' off TIL, harness Nv civilization. tn
same as ye see; an oil horse whin he is
turned loose in a pasture kick fup his
heels an roll in tn mud, an tn older
| it. Hogan says that iver since man wint
around with nawthin' on him but an
| apron made iv skins he has burrowed
| In th' earth an climbed threes to dnd
something that looked innocint which he
cud convart into booze. He says pigs an
riachraily to alcohol. He says there amt
i har'Iy annything that grows on III top
| iv tn arth that can't be turned into this
i wondherful karosene. It's made out ~
sugar cane, wheat. corn. potatoes, grapes.
oats, palm threes, cactus. mares milk,
/ beets, 40 pies, carrots. rice or artichokes.
| an, man wud make It out ~ mornfn'
glories. egg plant or rubber boots II he
| cud find nawfhin' else. Hogan Bays that
I in times gone by, whin our ancestors had
no more thin shed their tatls,. they wfnt
out an broke open q bee hive, ab.