Arizona republican., 1914-07-24
ANGE[EN0 D0NS COAT WHEN HE
 HITS PHOENIX
Los Angeles Daily Receives Crushing Reply to At tacks on Climate Here When Land Office Man Retains Outer Garment

Yes. Jim. P. Lavin, but not the weather Here's why.
 For several days, Los Angeles press has expressed it's covert opinion Of Phoenix by saying that there is little sense in shifting the inspector division of the United States land office from the salubrious coast city to Phoenix for sez the L. A. press Tt is so hot in Phoenix that the land office there has to be closed three months during summer
 But
 When J. M. Kern chief inspector of the interior department, headquarters, Los Angeles), delegated to land office work, arrived in Phoenix day before yesterday, he wore a suit of strong moleskin- like texture, guaranteed by the maker to be impervious to heat, moisture and the shafts of foppish ridicule, J. M. Kern passed all day We'd nesday in the office of the local rep resentatives of Uncle Sam's land de- partment, and during every moment
 
 J. M Kern averred that in two months just completed, he had not allowed a day to pass in which he had not shed that-and other-coats. And he lived and had his being, and worked out his destiny in the fair city of the Angels.
 Comparing the wonderful climate of L. A. with the hell-hot blazing sun- r11a lo iy the best thing some Los Angeles dail- ies did for couple of solid weeks after the announcement of the change of location was made. What inhu- manity, what devilish cruelty, to take these poor clerks from our delightful city to that hole!" exclaimed the edi- torial writers. It was a case for the Society for the Prevention of Demo- cratic Idiocyncracies. The thing should be stopped, for wasn't it a matter of fact that Phoenicians had to go away and leave their city to the tarantulas and fire-defying salamanders during about nine of the most altitudinously temperatured months in the year? Anrwer is, Tt was!"
 Nobody left in the capital of Ari- zona. Those who stay in July and August are either fools or rich enough to live in ice houses. Anyway. the l.. A. press consoled itself, the coast off cred a refuge.
 But to have a representative-the main gazabo, himself-of the Los An geles office, come to Phoenix and wear coat whose fond and clingng folds had been strangers for To, these two months.
 That's why Jim Lavin was peeved- not at the coat or at Kern, or at any, thing but the said press, which thought to clamor the inspector office right back to L. A. spite O weather re- ports and the glowing boosting of every real Phoencian!
 Jim and the R. A R. engaged in a lively argument about how MT. kerns presence should be told the reading public of Phoenix. The afore- mentioned representative of the Ari- zona Republican did dutifully report the arrival and the subsequent ac- llVlty Of Kern in what is known as
 lTlelSn that usually goes into this sort of a notice was employed-whch means that MT. Kern's presence was noted as follows:
 "J. M- Kern. special agent of the interior department, is in Phoenix on general inspection trip over the land offices and U. S. commissioners shops in Arizona. He is checking over homestead and other entries"
 Jim had seen the man busily DOT ing over his carefully kept records, and that coat stuck in his ocular craw. HE was not addicted to the coat-wearing habit. No, neither was John J. Birdno, Thomas F. Weedin. or the elevator boy in that habit. It was summer time. Phoenix was talk ing advantage of the -eputedly hot weather to be sanely comfortable. Phoenix had shed it's coat. But Kern hadn't and Kern was thereby branded as one of the fol- lowing;
 l. A stranger, or
 2. crank
 Being as MT. Kern didn't add a muller and ear tabs to his gay get up, no one could class him as No. 2 So he MUST be a stranger. And from Los Angeles-so his cards and | credentials read
 The plain facts are that the press Of the coast metropolis had a bug in its ear to holler down a rain bar nf Xl dlvlsion of the land office, and took the nearest-if not the best excuse Tor decrying the summer climate of | the Salt River valley.