Connecticut western news., 1914-02-05
The Wurra Wurra Club


 In the unavoidable absence of the genial and obliging sexton, Mir. S. Bel ligerent Strong. Mir. Jim Keenan nomi- mated the fat member as temporary chairman pro tenn. The fat member started to make a speech of acceptance before anybody seconded the nomination, and had gotten as far as his "grat'tude fir tn honor," etc, when Ed. Warner broke in with a reminder that "you ain't elected yet" But Will Wright said he would second the nomination, in the in- terest of harmony, and the fat member was unanimously elected. He declined to start a new speech of facceptasce, how ever, and called the meeting to order by humping the table with his knuckles. Fred Collin was ordered to sing the | Opening Ode, and responded by chant ing it as a bass solo in the upper register. He reached the finish line pretty we'll out of breath, and took his seat without lowing. Lew Rhoades read the minutes of the previous meeting by reciting "The Wreck of the Hesperus" instead, and it made hit. The fat chairman then said he would ask the clerk to tread tn call for tn meetin'." Clerk Hardenbergh said he didn't understand, and the fat chairman apologized, saying he twas thinkin' this was a town meetin'." Then he asked if anybody would make some kind of a motion or offer a resolution. "If not" he continued, without waiting for a response, "I'll oblige my maxim a speech about tn Cuss of T'bacco. Now it's always seemed t me that suthin' ort t be done t save tn young men. an boys specially, that's goin' t tn devil through t'bacco am cigarettes"
 "Mr. President" spoke up ex-Mayor Rowe, "I make the point of order that the chair IS out of order, and request a ruling on it."
 "I don't know nothin' about no rulin' on sech p'ints," said the fat chairman, man, "but if tn gentleman can't stand it t hear word ag'n' tn Cuss of T'bacco. why, I'll drop tn subject. A motion t adjourn is now in order, s'pose. Will anybody offer bidi"
 Mir. Dempsey moved a vote of con- graduation to the new Brotherhood of Christ Church, on the splendid success of its first union banquet, and that the secretary be instructed to communicate the same to the Rev. Mir. Mills, rector and president of the Brotherhood"
 "Wa'al dunno" said the fat chair man. "I dunno whether it's a good thing t keep mixin' up tn creeds an deaom nations that way, or not. It seems t me they ort t keep tn Meth dists an tn 'Piscopals, an tn Con'ga- tionists an tn Cath'lics all by theirselves tgether sep'rate, an not shuttle lem up so-"
 Mayor Roraback jumped up. "Mr. Fat Chairman" said he, "I feel it my duty to remind you that this is not classroom, nor a lecture course The speaking and arguments are confined to the floor, and not to the chair. It's your the vote-that's all. Now I second Mir. Dempsey's motion, and demand the vote"
 "All right, Mir Roraback," said the chair, "but want ye [ know I used | be a debater, myself, when was younger, an I'll show ye that I know suthin' about runnin' q meetin', an don't ye f'rgit it. Now them that's in fav'r O tn motion signify by sayin' l."
 There was a mighty chorus of "ayes."
 "Now then, them that's ag'in' tn motion say No"
 The only "No" came from the fat chairman, himself.
 "Have all voted who wish3" inquired the fat chair. "If so I declare tn clothes pole, an tn Nos have it."
 Immediately there was an uprising in all parts of the room, and several msm- bers made a rush for the chairman, but Deputy Sheriff Rhoades and Sir Knight Hen Ives went to his rescue and succeed | ed in preventing the crowd from tearing him limb from limb. As the assemblage seemed in danger of terminating in a riot, the sheriff to"k charge of the cere- monies, and declared the meeting ad- journed, sine die, and the fat member waited until the room was empty, then went out the side door and walked all the way home, leaving his team hitched under the town hoss shed.