Newark evening star and Newark advertiser. [volume] (Newark, N.J.) 1909-1916, 1914-06-06

on the polo field and in the yachting
world, and the more victories we
score the better they like it. There
are others, though, that seem to have
deadly grudge against us showing
to the front in international strife and
are always suggesting a way we may
be beaten. With this sentiment per-
vading the atmosphere on this side
of the ocean the wonder is not so
surprising that an appeal for alter
nate play is suggested by our cousins
abroad. If it was Uncle Sam who
was the helpless one, to whisper such
thing as giving US a chance over
here, would be looked upon as pure,
unauthorized gall. What we have
let us keep until ii is lost in the
regular way. If we are beaten at
polo we will go over to England and
try to win it back. If our good yacht
defender fails TO carry the Stars and
Stripes to victory, we will say Good
luck, Sir Thomas" but we will never
rest until we get the cup back again.
@
In order to appreciate the following
letter you must just keep reading
and reading until the laugh comes
in:
J. p. N:
After many sleepless nights in which
l have undergone untold mental
agony and suffering. I am at last
coming TO you to unburden my guilty
conscience of a question which has
long preyed on my mind and has re-
duced me to such a state as to be a
fit subject for forcible detention in q
haven of incurable insanity.
Dozens Of times I've been on the
verge Of proposing this important
subject to you, an infallible judge in
such matters, but the feeling that the
proper time for such a step had not
yet arrived prevented me from dis
playing my ignorance and inability
! to grasp such a complicated problem
f, But now all is different, and | have
decided to throw my caution and care
to the wind and come out in the oper
to surmount the barriers in my patti
| of deciding a matter of such vital inn
portance to myself and the common
wealth at large.
l have long felt the need of a frient
in which / could place the confidence
necessary for the fulfillment OF my
ambitions in ascertaining the knowl
edge ! am DESTROYS of gaining anC
therefore have selected you for thil
position, as no doubt exists in my
mind as to your integrity in giving
this matter fair decision and tutelage
Ordinarily l am foe of pen anC
ink, but the enthusiasm instigated b.
the thought that ! am soon to be en-
lightened on my question has fired mi
with surprising literary ability for
merly unknown to me, and to say tina
am pleased can be likened only t.
the elation of Theodore Roosevelt
discovering the "River of Doubt"
Numerous solutions have been sub
mitted to me, but with my meagr
knowledge of the subject l am un
able to discern the correct one AM
am therefore entrusting you with it
decision
l implore you to lay aside all work
care or responsibility that may res
upon you and donate a few moment
of your valuable time to this problem
which, | assure you, means the ful
fillment of my hearts desire.
This has caused me much heart
burn and We're it not for the fact tina
l place implicit confidence In you
fairness and sense of honor, yol
would not be the recipient Of this mes
sage
In the excitement of my eXpectanc
the object of this epistle was nearl
lost, but here goes:
If "Rocket" Clark fell out of a
airship, where would MacFarland
| am yours in haste, ON. /. YEz.
p. S.-Some of the answers sent t
me were yes and some mo" Wer
. these answers correct?
o
Inquiry for our old friend, Kat
Yama, the japanese bike fan. is cor
tanned in the following letter:
]. p. N:
Where has, Katz Yama disappear
} ed? / have enjoyed his letters i'm
mensely, and think they are yer
good. Did Frank Cayanagh ever G
to school? When he rides he neVt
, uses judgment. Frank Kramer
orr old champ again. What do yo
think, j. p. N? .
A REAL BIKE FANNESS.
Don't know what has become
Katz and his friend Nish. Perhal
they were insulted because Mr.. Mil
lon offered them season passes f'
3 The Yelodrome. Funny world. tn