The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1914-08-14
81
GEORGE
AIDE
aaoR,dsT onopsH Ado
IN
SLANG

| Peoria leaned back and let out a
Yowl. To think that a real up-to-date
Fellow would pull any of that Old
stufr A puny Mortal trying TO get a
Toe-Hold on the Demon
They told him to forget ii and quit
his Spoofng and remove his over.
shoes and ease a couple of Gills into
his Reservoir and try TO be a Human
Being, however painful the Effort.
He came back with few Gems
from the Family Medicine Book about
the Effect of the Aecursed stun on
various Organs. He did not propose
TO feed himself anything that would
cut the Varnish off Of Woodwork.
The Hard stun had passed out of
his Life.
The Cackles died away and were
succeeded by looks OF Blank Dismay.
They saw that one whom they had
long regarded as a reliable bench
working Union Lush had turned In
his Card and deliberately made him.
self an Outcast.
They saw him order Vichy and go
to it as if II we're a Beverage and
then they tore up his Credentials and
burned his Photograph and told him
to go out into the snowy Streets and
find a new Home,
He sat back and pulled the Grim
Smile which Savonarola wore when
they piled the Fagots around him. He
was a Martyr and proud OF his Job.
By the same Token, there is no Brand
of Rectitude that grades so pure and
spotless as that exhibited by the disin-
fected Dove who has not touched a
Drop for nearly "a hours.
They saw him go home with a
Magazine under his Arm and then
they sat around until all Hours, lap
ping It up and progging his Finish.
They said he never would last Week
and when he Fell 1t would be Some
Splash.
They began to issue daily Bulletins
and watched the Case with much
Anxiety because they really liked the
Old Scout in spite of his Eccentrici-
ties. When they learned, at the End |
of a Week, that he had played Butter. |
milk to a Standstill all up and down |
the Quick Lunch Circuit and was at
his Desk every Morning with his Face
clean and a Flower in his Coat, they |
called a Meeting of the Vigilantes and
decided that the Joke had been car.
ried far enough.
In the meantime, Our Hero had
learned two new kinds OF Solitaire
and began to call around for a Dish
Of Tea with some distant Female Rela.
tives who had long supposed him
Dead. Along about the Cocktail Hour
he would find himself sitting first in
me Chair and then in another but he
Jashed big every Morning when he
woke and found that Henry Katzen-
ammer was not sitting on the Foot.
Board making Faces at him.
Only, sometimes he would stop on
| Corner and look all about him and
lp at the Buildings and wonder if the
Town had always been as Quiet as at
Present.
After he had stuck for a Fortnight
he desperate ENJOYS from the Indian
amp went after him for Keeps. They
eld it in front Of him and splashed it
N his Clothes and begged him to step
board with them and go right up to
he 18th Floor.
Probably If they had let him alone
e would have come sneaking back
lto the Reservation to watch the red
and pick a few of those
Martins but when
hey tried to Stampede him, the old
lew England Stock asserted itself, so
e substituted Rivets for Straps.
He is now the honored Associate of
hose who play Cribbage in their own
Iomes and eat Apples before turning
I. But If you want to get a Line on
is Real Character just ask the Wet {
They will tell you that he /
,asn't there with the Strength Of =
haracter so he simply sank out of s
light. {
MORAL: The Way of the Fx