davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1914-06-03

a history of the alumni organization
and his talk was full of good things
and sayings. Il. G. Virgins next gave
some suggestions for the future good
of the association. Gladys McCord had
the topic Future School, and handled
it well. Stella Butler gave an
over the Teachers" talk which took
the form of prophecy for the class
of 1914. Then the banquet was SER
we'd and proved to be tempting two
course supper, well prepared and
daintily served. Many compliment.
airy things were said concerning it.
The following program was given next:
Address of welcome, William Walters
Response ...... -. Bryce Binnall
Solo Mildred Butterworth
...... Misses Rudd and Glassburner
Reading ........ Mrs. ID. Il. Bremscr
Solo :. Miss Susie Wore
Reading :. ........ Lucinda McHenry
Vocal Duet, Stella and Ferne Butler
Solo .... Mrs. l.. c. Hatch
The toasts and program were thor
oughly enjoyed. A social hour and a
time for greeting old school follows
was in order next and every one made
the most of the opportunity and a
general talkfest was had. The asso'
citation becomes dcarer each year to
the members and this event is looked
forward to with kcencst pleasure, and
after it is over with, is looked back
to with pleasant memories. And thus
the commencement doings OF 1914
came to a close.
am now prepared to buy cream
and am agent for the Hanford Produce
Co. of Sioux City. Bring in your
cream. Give us trial. L. ID. Barnes
22-lt
Mrs. Ollie Talcott is here from Wag
ner, S. Oak. for visit with relatives.
Word comes from Mrs. Craig who
is in the Denison hospital that, al
though she has been very near to
deaths door, she is now a little i'm
proved, but no great hopes are given
her husband that she will recover.
Howarth Bros. made shipment OF
hogs to South Omaha Friday night.
Miss Florence Miller was in Denison
Monday shopping.
Memorial Day was duly observed
here as is the custom. The day was
fine and large delegation gathered
for the services. The procession form
ed on Pearl st. at $3.50 A. M. where,
headed by the Dow City band and I'M
der the escort OF j. w. Howarth, mar
shall of the day, they wendell their
way toward the city of the dead. The
flower girls followed Immediately al
ter the frcing squad, the old soldiers
following next. At the cemetery the
services were held according to the
G. A. Il. ritual, the graves of the old
soldiers being marked with flags and
each receiving wreath of flowers.
The procession returned in the same
order as going out. At 1870 7. M. the
band boys assembled on the square
and; played several selections, their
new white uniforms showing to good
advantage. At 2 the services at the
church began, Rev. w. A. Nelson OF
the Baptist church delivering most
excellent address, paying excellent
tribute to the soldiers for their noble
work in the sixties. Miss Genevieve
Dow and Mr.. w. "A. Healy sang an ap-
The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1914-06-03
: ;. = : - *+**
BUCK GROVE ITEMS
:, :. :: :. ): :. :: :. !. !: = !: :. ;: :: :: ::

Mr.. and Mrs. Harley Chase mourn
the loss of an infant only week old.
They have the sympathy OF all their
friends.
Louie Asmussen was Sioux CITY
visitor from Thursday until Saturday.
Miss Olga Weller has been very Ill
with quincy but is better now.
Mr.. and Mrs. Gus DeCormick. visit
ed with Mr.. and Mrs. Martin McNert-
ncy from Saturday until Sunday.
Mr.. and Mrs. Finneran and friends
from Manila spent Sunday here. and
amused themselves with taking kodak
pictures.
Mr.. and Mrs. Elmer Pozien spent
Decoration Day in Manila.
Fred Glassburner Of Arion was 9
business caller Monday.
Tom G. Bonney arrived Saturday
morning from Chicago having finished
his first year in a dental college. Al
ter few days visit he will go on tt
his home in Aberdeen.
Miss Bcrnice Bonney arrived homo
from Schleswig Saturday. having fin
ished her year of school. She viii
spend her vacation at home.
DR.. B. B. Baldwin and wife arrived
here Monday at noon. He will Office
over Rciff and Hamers store. Tho
doctor and his wife are very genia
and pleasant and will be welcomed by
all. 1t is hoped that he will receive
enough patronage to enable him tt
stay here permanently as We sorelJ
need a doctor in town and DR.. Bald
win comes well recommended.
Mr.. Harold Henderson OF Kannar i:
guest at DR.. Bonney's for few days
We have received notice of the
Chautauqua that will be held in Den
ison next month. Everybody SHOULD
plan to go as it will be better thar
ever this year.
The Nicola Elevator is undergoing
repairs, r. Thaner doing the work.
Tom White of Sioux City was Wis
itor here from Friday evening unit
Sunday afternoon.
Mrs. J. P. Welsh entertained Mrs
Joe Shields and children and Mrs. TIES
sic Sullivan to dinner Sunday.
The Macedonians at work on tho
track are great musicians and very
fond of dancing and don't seem tt
mind the curious ones that gather
around them every evening to lister
and watch their strange dances.
The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1914-06-03
STOMACH SUFFER.
ERs READ THIS

So many stomach sufferers have
been benefited by a simple prcscrip-
ton of vegetable oils which cured a
Chicago druggist of chronic stomach,
liver and intestinal trouble OF years
standing that we want you surely to
try this remedy. 1t is known as Mayr's
Wonderful Stomach Remedy. One
dose will convince you. 1t usually
gives wonderful relief within "a hours
even in the most stubborn cases.
Mayr's Wonderful Stomach Remedy
is now sold here by Rudolph Knaul,
and druggists everywhere.
The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1914-06-03

Lydia r. flnKham >
Vege table Com
pound. When l first
began taking it l
was suffering from
female troubles for
some time and had
almost all kinds Of
aches-pains in low
er part of back and
in sides, and press
ing down pains. l
could not sleep and
Since I have taken
The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1914-06-03

The patrons of the Eric railroad de-
mand that the car windows be washed
instead of rendering thanks for not
having to ride in the freight car.
The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1914-06-03

1t is generally felt, unless a $500
day man helps the railroad magnates
pay the wages of their porters and
walters by tips, that he is pretty
stingy sort OF a fellow,
The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1914-06-03

Congress wants to adjourn early in
July, but probably it can avoid doing
business even if it remains in session.
The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1914-06-03

Every one is helping on tho de-
mand for lower taxes by promoting
efforts for more costly roads, schools
and public, buildings. y.
The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1914-06-03
MRS. LYONS =
ACHES AND PAINS
Have All Gone Since Taking
Lydia E. Pinkham's Veg
etable Compound.

Terre Hill, Pa" Kindly permit me
to give you my testimonial in favor or
The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1914-06-03
ALIENS
FOOT=EASE

s;
Tradc Nsrk cyerywhcre, 25c Sample FREE.
hddrcss Allen S. Olms. cd lie Roy NY.
The Man who pul The E E In + z Il
March 18-Sept 16
The Washington herald., 1914-01-18
HE WAS MR.. ARDEN

Wall chuckled the old man dryly.
here I am, alive and kicking. and a
purity healthy Enoch Arden. So she
married you. eh Does Hannah break
out in sudden fits like she used to-
Say, man, this is awful exclaimed
husband No. >. as the perspiration
gathered on his face.
Wall you needn't get so excited about
it. Enoch Arden did not git cent when
he played the hero and skipped out. but
that's whar' l differ with Enoch. II
you and Hannah are takin' comfort and
you have $50 you kin spare. Til git off
at the next station and let you alone,
although 1 kinder like to get squar' fur
that crack on the head. I couldn't fit
fine comb through my har fur 'leven
weeks arter l left home"
The man from Bloomdale frightened
up Immediately and eagerly counted out
the money. and as the other showed II
into his vest pocket and started for tn
door he remarked:
"Enoch Arden is satisfied. stranger
and he hopes you are. Good-by to you
-good-by all. and let Hannah continue
to imagine that 1 I'LL an unknown grave
and feel sorry to think she can't plant
sunfiowers above met
The Washington herald., 1914-01-18

l was drivin- along the highway be-
tween the towns of Never Despair and
Lost Hopes. seated on my tintype wagon,
and having my bottled grasshopper be-
side me, when i met with a sorrowful-
looking man who had bundle on his
shoulder and was limpiI.' on his left leg.
Without the corner stone of Integrity
to sustain us We must fall like a house
of sand,' says I, as We stopped to greet
each othe-.
And without Truth to uphold us We
should wither like weeds at the way
side,'' said he.
1 saw that he was critter with poetry
in his soul, and 1 was glad, and
got down from the wagon and took his
unwashed hand in mine and continued:
HE who lacks Faith is but a cucum-
Der of the slLund. Fait-. strengthens the
heart and rats springs under the heels
of the wayflrer
That's krect," says he, "and with
Ambition one surrounds the hiIltops and
reacheth his goal. Kin 1 take it that
YOU are i critter with a missionary
m'shun?'
you ken. 1 am speakin' kind words
as I travel and seekin' to make human
fly better. Dost hunger for consola-
tion?''
"I dost, says he. II want you to take
a square lock at me and tell what you
think of my personal shape. 1 don't
claim to be no Jim-dandy, but when nv
fellow-critters point the finger of ridicuIe
at me it is like knife at my heart
How long since you've seen yourself
in Q lookin' glaos?" says I.
The Washington herald., 1914-01-18
@. HOPE JONES
He Delivers A Lecture on Himself

dent which occurred during the exhibit
tion Of this great moral show at Bad
lAxe-on-the-Hudson. With most of his
clothes left behind as security for
hotel bill-with aching back and biist-
cred feet-with his pockets empty and
the future full OF thistles, but with spirit
undaunted and a determination which
never wobbled, q. Hope made his date.
His subject, as announced by yellow
hand bills and a boy ringing a bell. was
THE Heroines Of America" His audi
ence was large and enthusiastic. The
picture of Martha Washington. who
aided George to win the victory at Tren-
ton, was received with thunders of ap-
plause. Fortunately for him, he had
passed the hat and had taken up a col
lection of 80 cents, and was about TO
exhibit the picture of Molly Pitcher
when the lights went out and a sort
OF midsummer picnic took place.
Everybody threw vegetables at
everybody else. and the entire audience
threw vegetables at Q. Hope Jones. In
their delirious enthusiasm the people
wrecked the hall left the lecturer ly
ing unconscious amid the fragments.
and went home singing about hot
old time in that town. Had any en-
peror OF Rome been thrown down in
that fashion he would have got up
with his sand all gone. 1t would have
pumped the poetry all out of a Gre
clan bard. and given the greatest ora
tor of Persia the razZle dazzle. Q.
Hope simply extricated himself from
the wreckage to continue his onward
and upward career. Is there not a les
son in this, my hearers-is there not
an example here to be held up as a
lamp in the darkness? Let US now
pass the hat. That is, ] will pass
among you, receiving . cent here and
The Washington herald., 1914-01-18

Az Mr.. Bowser rode home in the car
the other passengers locked at him and
whispered to each other:
Poor pan"'
what do you think 1t is?''
He's probably been telephoned to that
his wife Is dead"
I'm good mind to offer him s.
cent cisar!'
When he got of at his corner a man
| stood there who took quick look at
him and whispered to himself
when you see strong man on the
verge of tears 1t means something! All,
Umw
Mr.. Bowser paused at the gate and
sighed.
He climbed the steps and sighed twice.
There was tear In his left eye as Mrs.
Bowser opened the door to him and ex-
claimed:
HAS the President been assassinated"'
Dunno"
You haven't heard that mother, was
deadr'
No"
Then for mercy's sake what is it,.
You are the most melancholy wreck OF a
man / ever set eyes on"'
There is reason for II. Two hours
ago I received news Of the death Of
Hiram Gordon"
AnQ VINO on edrtn ID Hiram SOfQOn.
she inquired after vainly trying to recall
the name.
My second cousin, out in Nebraska.
Yes. poor Hiram passed away from earth,
and his troubles are over
Mrs. Bowser had no remembrance OF
any second cousin, and she was sure that
Mr.. Bowser had held no correspondence
with any for years and years. Besides.
he was not the man to let the death
of a distant relative pull him down to
any extent She wanted to say so. but
it suddenly occurred to her that this was
one of Mr.. Bowser's freaks. As they sat
down to dinner she began TO chat away
of the events of the day to chase away his
sorrow. but he looked at her reprovingIy.
and said:
Mrs. Bowser. this hilarity is altogether
out of place under the circumstances. and
you ought to have sense enough to real
ize it,
II am not hilarious" she replied, but
do not see why the death Of a second
cousin whom you have not seen for
twenty years should plunge our house
into the depths of gloom"
IF you do not, l do. and you will
greatly oblige me by keeping your levity
for some other occasion
He ate very sparingly and sighed fire.
quently, and he forgot to say the steak
was overdone, and that there were Jumps
in the mashed potatoes. As they ad-
journed to the sitting-room he sank into
chair with a whispered groan and said
to himself.
Poor Hiram, Poor Hiram, And yet
he is better off"
The Washington herald., 1914-01-18

During a lull in the conversation five
or six of us were holding in the smok-
ing car an oldish man leaned forward
and queried of the man behind me:
Didn't l hear you mention the town
of Bloomdale?'
Yes, sir" was the reply. Yes, l live
at Bloomdale.
Glad to know it." continued the other.
II used to live there. too, but my wife
hit me a crack with a poker one day and
I got up and walked of and am just re-
turnin' after an absence Of ten years.
I'm pIayin' the Enoch Arden business,
YOU know. and the ole woman will jump
a foot high when she sees me.
WHO was your wife?'' asked my seat
mate, with a tremor in his tones.
Hammer Bliss, sir. Mebbe you know
her-tall woman-squint eyes-long chin
peaked nose-voice like file.''
Great Scott whispered the man.
but you don't tell me that the Widder
Bliss is your wife, Why. she thought
you were dead years ago"
did she marry again.
''S-she did. sir. The papers said you
were killed in Indiana. and after wear
ing mourning for a year she married
me-"
The Washington herald., 1914-01-18

And thereupon ] asked him to posture
himself with his back to a tree and a
smile on his face. and I got down my
camera and proceeded to business. In
a quarter OF an hour l had his picture
ready. 1t was a faithful counterfeit of
the homliest-lookin' critter in the enthu-
siastic West and as l handed ii to him
I said:
Man that is born of woman is not al
ways purity, but the world will judge him
by the integrity of his character"
rs that my picture?' asked the old
man afte- gazing at it awhile.
It's you tc a dot
Cant be no mistake about It? The
wheels and linch-pins and piston
rods didn't get mixed up while you was
takin' the picture?"
mot a mix. It's you to the life
Then the cid man fell to weepin', and
I leaned up agin the wagon and felt sor-
rer in my heart. l was about to speak
words of cor,for. to him when he says:
Pilgrim, knowed l wasn't purity, but
this is too much. II I am a critter, like
this makes me out to be. it's no use liv-
in any longer II you was a man with a
soul you'd have cheered me up instead
of castin' me down, and you shall perish
with mer'
Thereupon he threw down his hat, lift
ed his arms and sailed into me. He was
an oldish man, but his muscles were hard
and his sand was plentiful. / fit him ac-
cording to the rules of John l.. Sullivan.
but / was a-weary before he reposed on
his back ano announced that he had had
enough. Then / damned him for the sake
of his mother, and chugged him in the
cause of mortality. and cuffed his ears
The Washington herald., 1914-01-18

What fills my heart with sorrer is the
fact that no second husband comes along.
Other wilder women are gettin' married
every week, but no one seems to want
me. I'm livin' here ali alone and workin'
the claim with my own hands"
Then l locked at her long time, and
/ noticed that her shoulder was Topped,
her nose turned up. AMI her mouth was
cut on the bias. There was no beauty
about her, but she was good-hearted and
sorrered 20 become an ivy Clingin to a
sturdy oak ! therefore got down my
camera ami pO=ed her as picturesquely
as possible and took her tintype. AS I
handed it to her the rapture of her soul
was revealed in her face. She was
smiles and laughter and rejoicin'. for she
had discovered that she was beautiful to
look upon.
And viii do yet more" said as she
heaped blessings upon my head.
Whenever and wherever I meet a lone
critter as l so my way ] will show him
one of those tintypes and bid him make
haste and secure the matrimonial prize
before all Others"
She wept again. but this time it was
because OF her great joy and gratitude.
Thus left her to jog along again in the
lengthening shad1ers of the summer aft
ernoon, and as y logged ! reflected:
Had 1 bin great I should not have
been in the tintype dizziness, and the
widder woman would still be weepin' and
lamentin.''
Therefore, aim not at riches and
strive not for greatness. but by the aid
of Integrity and Humility lift up your
feller-man and add to the happiness Of
the world
The Washington herald., 1914-01-18

The one was a man about sixty years
old, with a satchel on his knees. The
other was a man of about the same age,
with a satchel between his feet. They
sat opposite each other in the street
car, and each had a mourning band on
his hat. By and by they happened to
look at each other, and fellow-feeling
welled up in their hearts at once.
II take it," said No. l. as he leaned
across the aisle. that your beloved
wife has departed from this cold
world?"
''She has," was the reply You also
seem to have suffered the same sor-
row.
"Jest the same. Yes. my wife has
been laid away to rest. 1t comes hard,
don't it,
Powerful hard. Did you feel as II
you wanted to go. too?"
II did. 1 purity nigh committed sui
eide
so did i. Did you git over that feel
in after about three months?"
"Wall. sorter."
The Washington herald., 1914-01-18

and bade him remember that honor was
a bulwark which could not be overcome.
By and by he stood on his feet and went
| his way, but the spring of enthusiasm
was not in his heels, nor was there a
well-sprin.y o. happiness in his heart.
When he was far awa.- I mounted my
wagon and drove on, and as the old boss
logged and the grasshopper hunted his
head agin the cork in the bottle, found
myself exclLiming:
1T is not the wealth we lay up in banks
that brings happiness, but a clear con-
science maketh a man to glow in his
soul"
And also:
1T is better to argue than to quarrel,
but If the other feller refuses to argue
then swins your right for his jaw and
put him to sleep
And also:
Humanity becometh a man at all
time, but don't be SO humble as to let
every old c,itter get away with you."
And when he had logged a mile or more
We came to the sodhouse of a pioneer,
a woman whose eyes were red with weep
ing.
woman. what is thy sorrer~ I asked
as 1 halted my outfit.
"I am d widder-womanr she replied
as she wipes her weepin' eyes.
How lony; is 1t since you laid the part
ner Of your bosom away?'
Seven years more"
Then you ought to have got over
weepin' by this time. I believe most of
'em cease to weep after the first year"
But I'm not weepin' for my old man."
says she, as she braces up bit
The Washington herald., 1914-01-18

a button there. but feeling thankful
for whatever falls into the hat. LeJ
me say that there is nothing in life
that cannot be won by perseverance.
No matter how high your aim. you
can reach the peg IL you are deter
mined. The collection, as l may cas-
ually observe, amounts TO 81 cents and
a large assortment of souvenirs. and
I am encouraged to renewed exertionS
From my position l note that various
persons among this representative au-
diepce have come supplied with various
mementos, and that they are growing
impatien After l have exhibited two
more pictures we will have an inter
mission of five minutes. and during this
interval the bombardment can take place.
/ shall not only emerge from il alive
and undau.ited. but will turn up AT Fish
kill in good spirits tomorrow night and
illustrate events in Cuban history in =
way to arouse enthusiasm for seven miles
around.
The Washington herald., 1914-01-18
TWO OF A KIND

Same with me. You fust thought
you'd buy a hundred dollar grave-stun,
didn't you?''
That was exactly my figger.''
Same here. Got one yit?''
''Noap.'
Neither have /. How much you goin'
to pay when you do git one?"
About fifty dollars"
That's my figger. Did it seem to you
fur the fust six months as if you could
never marry agin?"
TT did
THE same with me. Then you kinder
had a feelin' that II was your dooty?"
That's it-that's IT,"
Same with me. Then you begun to
cast your eyes around fur a widder?'
"Sure's you live 1 did
Same with me. And you found one?"
81 did, and I'm soin' to be married next
week"
Same with me. and il We happen to
run across each other on our bridal tours
let's poke each other in the ribs and
knock off hats and drink a lot of ginger
ale and hev fun togethsri'
The Washington herald., 1914-01-18

| 1 might stand the yowling of cats or th'
wailing of hand organ. but when d
man breaks in on my grief with the flddIt
II Is going too far"
Mrs. Bowser begged and pleaded. bu
he was nrm. He was so nrm that HI
didn't wait for his hat. lie passed out.
doors and through the gates ana rams
the bell OF the next house. and It wa.
the man of the iiddIe who answered his
ring.
II want this riot stopped SAID Mt
Bowser, with his usual promptness.
What riot asked the wondering
neiGhbor.
You are playing on the iiddler'
Yes. but 1 am IN my own house.
think you live next door. don't you
Exactly. and while l am grievIng to-
night over the death of my second cousin
IN Nebraska YOU are saving away on
II blamed Old fiddle: 1t must be
stopped"
"Oh, it must. We'll see about that.
What is your second cousin to me? How
dare you come here ana say 1 must DO
this or that?
''wIIl you stop this squawkIng or nOt?''
demanded MIR. Bowser.
mo, l won't, and you'd better get
back home: want no KIcKers Ieinng
Sir. my second cousin out in Nebras-
ka-
"Durn your second cousin out in Ne
braska and you, too
Then MIR. Bowser grabbed both man
and fiddle. From her door Mrs. Bowser
saw them clinch and struggle and roll
down the steps and over the ground and
the cat looked on and said to herself
that II was the prettiest scrap that she
had seen for a year. At the end of five
minutes Mr.. Bowser let go and returned
home. His clothes were torn in tatters,
his nose bleeding. and his chin had been
Knocked out of true, but behind he had
left just as sad a looking object. and a
fiddle in fragments besides. lie stood in
the hall and puffed and blowed ana
glared at Mrs. Bowser for a minute and
then said:
Woman, retire to your ROOM
But 1 want to get the arnica ana
camphor and alcohol and sponge
and
Woman. retire. he interrupted.
And when she had passed upstairs he
sat down on the lounge to commune with
his grief and wipe his bleeding nose on
a handy corner or the mantel drape.