The Washington herald., 1914-09-27

I
had represented to me the ne plus ultra
OF splendor. He certainly went after
| the hammer throwing record when he
told me what he thought of the out
| fits that praised most highly. l stood
| this briefly and tried TO shade my no.
! tions about ornate raiment to agree with
his, but / saw II was no use. and l went
right ahead and insisted that n I knew
anything about II there were a great
many lovely masquerade outfits there.
Are you a Judge? he asked me, after
had spoken my mind.
We'll. yes replied. for l thought
/ was as good a Judge Of such things as
anybody-certainly Just as good a one
as he-especially when such things are
all Just a matter of taste.
Then said he, Just remember me.
and he darted out into the crowd. but
not until after he had showed a piece
OF paper into my side coat pocket.
stared after him. rather glad that he
was gone, for II seemed to me pre-
sumptuous for a man to come Up and
argue with an innocent bystander at
masquerade ball about what constI-
tuted the most elegant costume. As
matter Of cat there were plenty OF
costumes that I liked Just as well as
his. and as he hastened away / caught
glimpse OF his red hair showing be-
meath his wig. which wasn't red at all
either to cover his own hair completely
That thought showed poor taste II
a man Is going to wear a wig, he ought
or else have the wig the same color.
Still. l wouldn't have thought anything
about such details II the fellow hadn't
Knocked all the other peoples outfits So
Just then Horner rushed up and said
he was all ready to go. and he was
fraught with much talk about a couple
Of beautiful young women he wanted
to take me TO meet. They were indeed
rather attractive, found. an hour or so
later. Besides being restful to the
retina. the one I was assigned TO chat
with had great many IDEAS about
things that fairly captivated me. She
thought that person who loves travel
would do well TO see his own country
before going abroad. and also that peo-
pie living in the larger cities do not
know their neighboTs so well as those
who dwell in the towns and villages
She had been Visiting in the South the
previous July and asked her II II
were not foolish to go South in the heat
OF summer. She replied that while the
days were extremely warm. there was
always a good breeze at night and that
she invariably slept under blankets. ri
thought that a rather clever way to put
II. Instead OF stating the exact heat
registration on the thermometer. she
simply said that she slept under blankets.
and from that I knew the air was cool
and comfortable.
so we stayed and talked to the girls
TIL a late hour-Tm ashamed to say just
how late. II was not until, We were
waiting for an owl car that I happened
to put my hand in my inside coat pocket
and felt a piece of paper that I did not
recall putting there. In a second I re-
membered. 1t had been tucked there by
the masked man who thought he repre-
sented Napoleon. I took II out and
looked at it-and gasped! 1t was not a
piece of paper at all, but a crumpled
new 10 bill
81 narrated to Horner rapidly how
the bill came into my pocket.
He stared at me moment and then
declared. excitedly: You've been bribed"
'wh-a-a-t?' 1 asked him.
Yes says Horner. that fellow
thought you were one Of the judges. You
know they had a prize up of SO for the |
one wearing the handsomest costume and
the rivalry was intense, l can tell you. !
That fellow probably figured that II he |
took first prize 1t would make him solid !
with some girl Even at that SO is "a |
good deal of money. He'll be sore when |
he finds out you weren't Judge at all
Let's hurry back there and I'll give |
the money back to him. 1 suggested. |
huskily. 1m-Im tnsulted. The idea Of /
that guy trying to bribe me-!
But Horner said the masquerade had |
doubtless broken up before that. It's !
too bad he said. because the fellow will !
probably try to knock your block OF !
when he sees you. What sort of a look |
ing geek was he?'
Why l answered in a shrill Shrek. /
he was masked. He knows me by sight. !
hut / don't know him-except that--he !
seemed TO be red headed. Am I to go |
through life henceforth cringing at the .
sight OF red-headed men?'
"Horner tried to comfort me by say
ing that Brooklynites were not a migra-
tory people and that IL just kept across .
the river doubtless I should be safe
enough. But all the next day kept |
shudderinE every time saw a red-headed
man. and II a man not red headed looked '
at me sternIy I gave twitch anyhow,
fearing that perhaps the fellow wasn't
so rcd headed after all.
And now said Henry J. Mix, you
know why am willing to spend my days
seated in a little hick drug store like this.
stunning my fellow men and haunted al
ways by the fear that eventually I shall
be overtaken by red-headed Nemesis.
Sometimes I get so desperate that al
most have a notion to raise whiskers."
,CoprEht. 1911. by Fred c. Kelly