Evening star., 1914-11-01
By John KENDR1CK BANGS

could only laugh it, put the situation before
wholly comprehensive that l have for
gotten it.
"See that red-headed chap in the fourth row. he
whispered, the chairman indulging in
tended remarks concerning greatness to which
could never hope to live up.
"You mean the pail bearer with the green neckte?" l
asked.
"Yes,7 said Munkttrick, @he's the one.'
"Well-what of him?" said l.
"Oh, nothing grinned Munkittrick, "but I'll bet
you dollars and forty-seven he's bet the
boxofice fifty cents we can't make him laugh"
may record with due humility that if good old Mum
kittrck surnse correct highly chromatic but
otherwise funereal friend his bet. l doubt
could have moved him with dynamite.
But these gentlemen serve highly useful purpose
They keep with feet the earth, and prevent
from soaring too high in estimation
ANOTHER effective factor in this disciplinary ele-
in platform work is the "back-handed"
plmen that leaves the party of the second part
pended like Mahomets cofin midway between heaven
and earth and in uncertainty exactly where
"he is going get off, have rejoced in several such
The great State of Pennsylvania which has Officially
done much for the platform by its liberal appropria
tions for teachers institutes, enabling the school
the services of speakers of high who
would otherwise be beyond their reach, responsible
for of these.
1t occurred three years ago. and grew out of
unexpected summons by wire from of the largest
cities of the Quaker State asking to "h in for Dr.
Grggs, who because of sudden ndispostion unable
to meet his engagement in large and important
there. 1t emergency call, which fortunately
found me disengaged, and willing to serve
The chairman of the occasion delightful in
divdua with considerable fund of dry humor, and
his introduction gem of subtle wit. 1t occupied
about fifteen minutes the first five of which de-
voted to matters pertaining the course the second
five we'll deserved eulogy of DR.. Griggs for his in
spring lectures and the uplifting nature of his work.
coupled with expression of the intense dsappoint-
ment which he, the chairman knew the audience must
feel learning that the good doctor could be pres
ent thought he rather rubbed the disappointment
idea in little too vigorously; but tried not to show it.
and sat through that part of the chairmans remarks
with the usual stereotyped smile of satisfaction at hear
ing colleague highly spoken of. This done, the
chairman launched himself upon a four-minute dis
upon what he called @The Age of Substitution.
"You know, my friends said he that this great age
in which live is rich in resources that at times
when cannot Immediately lay hands some
particular article happen to want there is always to
be found somewhere Just good article to take its
place you desire particular kind of porous plaster
to soothe altoo-sefconscious spine, and the drug
gst you call upon for aid does chance have it in
stock, he invariably has another at hand which he
you will do quite we'll So it is with the
foods breakfast foods plasters face powders facial
soaps suspenders corses liver pills, and lecturers. If
we haven't what you want, we have something just as
good in this Age of Substitution. So is it with
Continued page IS