davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1914-05-14
IF ONLY WOULD HAPPEN.

We could not help thinking what a
fine thing it would be if there were
some sort of municipal power to en-
force the.forming of a regiment OF peo-
pc who are the biggest kickers i'm the
community, and send them along to the
war. Of course no such thing will hap
pen, but, like reading the stories in the
fairy book, it is pleasant to dwell upon
the picture silently. Chippewa Falls
Independcnt
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1914-05-14

A Harvard Professor says there are
148 good and unobjectable substitutes
for the word damn. The professor
evidently never fell over rocking
chair in the dark, or stepped on a toy
engine on the stairway.
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1914-05-14

A little dilatoriness is being INDUCED
in the by goose bone weather prophets in
the announcement of their prognostlca-
tons as to whether the approaching
summer will be uncomfortably warm
or otherwise.
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1914-05-14

The principal drawback about marry
ing an antarctic explorers widow is
that one may be hero and the world
would never know it.
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1914-05-14

Lover California has seeded from
Mexico, hut in the excitement nobody
has noticed it, which must be dis
couraging to the secessionists.
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1914-05-14
Is governed by a College.

That Unexampled Commonwealth
Whose progress battles guessers
Imbibes the rules of Civic Health
From erudite professors:
And every call for learning's fruits
Receives quick response in
The Institute of Institutes
Which educates Wisconsin.
IT'S there the Farmer studies BEANS
Both how to plant and hoe them.
q read such things in magazines.
And that is how | know them.)
And every other Seeker gets
Exactly what he pleases
The art of selling chiffonettes.
The art of making cheeses.
From there the Legislature draws
High Thoughts and Fine Ambitions;
He learns the mode of making laws
For Bettering Conditions.
And, nobler still Though Judges fout
And Legal Lights disparage,)
The proper way to bring about
Your True Eugenic Marriage!
You look askance?- You think per
chance
I'm testing for the nonce in
My lofty song?-Nay, nay! your
wrong;
reverence Wisconsin!
A glad Utopia see,
Advanced while others lag on,
Where none may wed on any plea
Without Doctors tag on
Where every law is wise and sound,
Each couple rightly mated,
Each Wicked Merger tightly bound
Each Railroad regulated;
Where every house is crammed with
books,
Where money fills each wallet,
And every Well-born Baby looks
Like Robert M. LaFollette!
Arthur Guiterm an in Life.
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1914-05-14

General Coxey says he is satisfied
with the size of his army; and if it
keeps on dwindling, the rest of the
world will join in his enthusiasm.
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1914-05-14
SUFFERING
TWO LONG YEARS
Mrs. Aselin Was Restored to
Health by Lydia E. Pink
hams Vegetable
Compound.
Minneapolis, MINI. - After my little
one was born was sick with pains in

my sides which the
doctors said w ere
caused by infamma-
ton. / suffered a
great de al every
month and grew very
thin. | was under the
care for two
long years without
any benefit. Finally
after repeated sug-
gestions to try it we
got Lydia E. Pink
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1914-05-14

The Spaniards who sent Columbus
back in chains must have been touched
with a gift of prophecy regarding what
his discovery of America would bring
about.
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1914-05-14

The discovery by a French savant
that men and women were equal in the
days Of old Egypt only serves to show
how men have degenerated.
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1914-05-14

Strange how quickly the eugenic
movement fades away when something
Important comes around.
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1914-05-14

United States Senators under the
new primary law are likely to become
popular if not important.
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1914-05-14

No one can deny that Tom Upton is
doing what he can to cheer US up by
planning another boat race.
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1914-05-14

Judging from Gen. Woods view en-
the sanitary benefits of war, he must
be planning cleanup campaign.
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1914-05-14

This is the time of the year when old
time people, who always had such good
health, began drinking sassafras tea.
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1914-05-14

A New York litigant wins suit for
$48, 900 at cost of $186, 900 and still
some folks insist that New York law
yers want it all.
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1914-05-14

Don't judge by appearances. Men
who wear diamond pins sometime have
real money.
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1914-05-14

But Wat we all really hope is that
some Icy. CT will the giftie give us to
never see ourselves as others see US.
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1914-05-14

Flying with aeroplanes upside down
or sideways is growing popular. Guess
its safer that way.
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1914-05-14

A prosperous man is one who can
part with his money long enough to
haveit Numbered.
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1914-05-14

Perhaps Caruso will settle with the
Tilted maid who is suing for $500, 900 by
singing to her a few times.
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1914-05-14
THURSDAY, MAY Ia, 1914.

The fellow who pities himself does
not deserve pity from anybody else.
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1914-05-14

Two can live as cheaply as one-but
they won't.
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1914-05-14

Suggestion for the next and biggest
dreadnaught; name it the water
wagon.
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1914-05-14
THIS end That

When a travelling street fair recently
eft Albany, Ca, local merchant was
left with a supply of confetti on his
hands. AS the fair was playing" a
nearby town he thought of a friend
there who was interested in one of the
| concessions and sent him the following
telegram:
shipping you today 100 pounds of
confetti to sell affair.
In day or two he had reply.
"Stuff here" read the telegram:
chow do you cook -Everybody's
Magazine.
The doctor was worried about the
condition of his patient Il think |
shall have to call in some other physi-
clan for consultation.
Chats right; go ahead, . said the
patient, quiet cheerfully. "Get as
many accomplices as you can.
One evening, when water Inspector
was going his round, he stopped at one
of the mains in busy street to turn off
the water owing to some repairs He
had just put the handle on the tap and
began turning when hand was placed
On his shoulder by tipsy gentleman,
Who said, in drunken tone:
$50 | have found you at last, have |?
It's you that's turning the street
cound, is it?'
An old farmer and his wife drove to
market one day. 1t had been a very
vet day, and large pools of water had
formed on the roadway between the
farm and town. On the return journey
an old friend was met.
"And how are you today?" was the
friendly greeting.
"Oh, very well, thank you, :" an
swered the farmer.
"How is the missus?" continued the
friend
''She's fine, fine!'' answered the far
mer, "She's behind there" jerking
his thumb toward the back seat.
She's not there" said the astonished
friend.
The old farmer slowly turned and
looked over his shoulder, then cody re-
piled: "Humph! That was the splash
then.
Recently at place which is famous |
for it's aerodome a youthful wag was
watching with interest some wonder
full contests in the air. Just when ex-
element was at it's height the wag
started up a rambling conversation
with those Immediately round him.
'That's terrible poison that's just
been discovered, he remarked amiablv
to no one in particular.
whats it called?" inquired an elder
w gentleman beside him.
'FWhy, aeroplane poison of coursew
came the curt reply.
'1s it deadly?" asked thee. G.
Il should say so!'' jerked out the
juvenile wag, in his most knutty style.
''And how much would kill a persona"
went on the questioning one.
ooh, one drop!' came the retort.
Then that particular group became
the less by one.
Everything is lovely,
Folks are shaking hands.
Sun is shining brightly,
Over pleasant lands,
Birds are singing sweetly,
Nature is in tune,
Every days as pleasant
AS the first of June.
Health is all it should be,
You're in jovial mood,
All the worlds garden,
When you re making good.
Baraboo weekly news. [volume] (Baraboo, Wis.) 1912-197?, 1914-05-14

about.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-06-10
Blood Tonic Has
llnpoIt allt Meaning
Puts the Right Sort Of Vim
Where Most Needed.

:. To tone the blood means to enable II to
throw on accumulated impurities, to in
crease the red corpuscles and to put the
Diooo-maktng organs into such active condi-
lion as to produce that conscious sensation
OF what we feel Us health.
This is the logical effect Of using the
famous blood purifier, S. s. s.
Hair the people you meet complain OF
weary muscles, stagn6nt brain, tangled
nerves and wonderful desire to lay down
and just quit. Most of these people have
been using nervines that systematically fare
mp the nerves only to die down again, as
die they must Avoid nerve stimuauts,
Bear In mind that this worn-out feeling IS
due TO poor blood. to bacteria in the water
you drink; to the multiplying Of destruc-
tive germs In tho blood faster than they
can be overcome by the white corpuscles
ana 70 what Is known as auto toxemia, that
condition where the venous or impure blood
accumuiates faster than 1t can be replaced
by the red arterial blood
8. 8. s. he's long been famous "A = blood
purifier. and its action by elimination OF
the Irritating poisone that infest the blood
- one OF the very important things to know
You can get 3. 8. 8. at any drug store
but take no other so-called blood purifier
3. s. b. - purely vegetable product,
and you will! make great mistake to have
some enthusiast palm OF a mercury. arsenic
or iodfde OF potash preparation that may
90 you trFeparable harm. n
Co.. .533 Swift Bldg, Atlanta. Ga, and ii
you have any deep seated or obstinate blood
trouble. write to their Medical Dept for
free advice. It will be worth your while
to do %.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-06-10
RIsHOP DAVIS IS
GOING TO VATICAN
Head Of Diocese Of Vatican wilt Make
Visit to Pope This
Summer.

Rt. Rev. James Davis, bishop Of the
Catholic diocese OF Davenport will
leavs the latter part OF the month
for Rome, where he will hold an
audience with Pope Plus X. At that
time he will make q complete report
of diocesan affairs to the head Of tn 9
Catholic church. New church regula-
tions provide that each bishop must
make q report to the pope In person
every five years.
1t was announced yesterday that
the annual collection for Pope Plus
X would be taken up in all the Cath
Ollie churches OF the Davenport do
cese next Sunday. Bishop Davis, in
a letter to the priests und ef his jur-
isdiction made an appeal to the peo-
pie to be liberal on this occasion, as
he will deliver In person to the pope
the amount received and he trusts
the Davenport diocese will make a
comparatively good showing. The
exact time Of his departure for Rome
he's NOT vet been fixed.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-06-10
To Haze Perfect Skin
Throughout the Summer

These days the face needs special
care and attention. Flying dust and
dirt, the beating sun. are severe on
any skin. Their despoiling effects are
best overcome by the application Of
pure mercolized wax. This keeps skin
and pores in clearly condition, the
complexion beautifully white and
spotless. Discolored, freckled and
roughened cuticle are actually absorb
ed by it. One ounce OF mercolized
wax, obtainable at any drugstore. is
sufficient to completely renovate a
soiled complexion. 1t is used like
cold cream, allowed to remain on
over night, and washed or In the
morning.
AS the skin tends to expand in
warm weather, causing wrinkles to
form, good astrings ant lotion should
be used. Dissolve OF. powdered sax
olite in u pint witch hazel. Battle
the face In this during the heat OF the
day or before going out for theatre
or social affair. 1t is q remarkable
skin tightener and wrinkle eraser.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-06-10

were doing, 80 !, In turn, wrote the1r
names on blank paper and gave them
to the old man to put into the tube
| first wrote the name of Gerard
Huiskamp. found that Puss had be
come great financier and he also war
q. the head Of a manufacturing con
Germ. was quite sure that Gerard
could now use some OF the experience
which he obtained in leading our
scrappy class meetings.
! Could this be possible that Clarence
Alling and Vivian Demple we're max.
ing big hit in the stage world by
dancing the Ancient Medieval and
modern tango dance and some of the
oriental dances?
My, how glad l was when / read
tina. Arthur Kirby had made good in
his Office as bodyguard and had lately
been promoted. He married that fair
Junior girl.
Remembering Mary Kiedaisch's skill
In working trigonometry. ! wasn't at
all surprised that she had become q
teacher in that study.
Ross Wilson and Russell Buss we're
now at the head Of an engineering
company, and the contract for build
ing the highest building in the world
was let to them,
jeanette Wunderly, the young lady
with the big determinations and air
castles floating about her, had at las.
come down from her lofty position and
was now taking her place in vaude-
vile as a chorus girl.
Walter Nichols. the boy who loved
to be dressed right up to the minute,
had at last got position in which he
could quench his desire. He was a
living model In one of the New York
stores. Every other day they used
walter in the ladies' department.
Clifford Agnew had become lee
turer for boys and had convinced
many a boy never to start the use OF
the horrible cigarette. OF course this
was before Clifford got any bad habits.
Maiorie Moore, the girl whom re-
member as being of very quiet ma
ture had gone now to the other ex-
treme and was always ready for lot
of excitement Because of her interest
In such events. she became sport
ing editor for an eastern paper.
Harry Pagett had become a tall,
robust fellow. / was somewhat sur
prised when I read this. But there
was one way I could account for 1t,
when Harry graduated he was quite
fond of a freshman girl and If he
went with her, for her remaining
years in school, he surely had enough
exercise to make him grow.
Verna Miller and Alice Lfnquist,
was sorry to read. had become suf-
fraget.e leaders. But ! was still more
sorry for their Nauvoo friends.
Beulah Brumbach and Wyman Boil
ton both became society leaders. Yes,
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-06-10
SINGER propped Dead.

UNITED Press Leased Wire Service.
CHICAGO, June 1O.-Chas. J. Sing.
or. member of the Singer Sewing Ma
chine family, father of Miss Helen
Singer, now the Princess Ghilka OF
Albania, and prominent SPECTATOR
on the Chicago I1oard Of Trade TWEEN
ty-fve years ago, dropped dead IN
Paris, according to a cablegram re-
ceived here. Singer was associated
with the late P. d. Armour for many
years and amassed fortune. While
abroad, his daughter met and mar
RED Prince Jean Ghilka, claimant to
the Albanian throne. Part Of Sing
er's fortune is said to have been
spent in financing the princes claims.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-06-10
The Magic Tube

Floyd Austin Setter. may not be
the seventh son Of seventh son. but
Q him was entrusted the Job of weav-
Ing the prophesy of,tne class Of 1914.
Now well he succeeded may be found
IN the following:
During my travels in Turkey I was
very much impressed by a curious
looking little shop along one Of the
narrow streets. Because this build
ins and its decorations were SO much
inherent from the rest Of tho houses,
escame curious TO enter and see
xhat was sold there. l was met by q
pleasant old man, who, noticed, car
ned . highly polished tube. and who
informed me his business was 20
look into the future. at once became
sory much interested and asked him
now II was possible for him to do
nus He Immediately held up his
. ~ and lovingly stroking II. said:
lou have wonderful powers hidden
y you," and then he went on to tell
ne about The tube.
me construction Of this tube was
suAe simple, but the work 1t did was
vssoad my knowledge. II you would
s1He the name Of person ON q piece
y, o'ank paper and then put II into
:, tube, leave 1t for one minute.
ueh remove 1t. there would be printed
~ mls paper something OF interest
s0o0t the person whose name you
had written.
49,. nau now been out Of school for
1850. years and Of course was In
esed to know what my classmates
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-06-10
NOTICE OF INTENTION.

Notice OF intention to pave alleys
through blocks 1876 and 90. city.
Notice is hereby given that at .
m setting Of the city council OF the
city of Keokuk, held on the 8th day
of June, 1914, there was introduced q
resolution hereinafter set forth. and
that by resolution OF the city council
duly passed on said date, the said
resolution hereinafter set forth, will
be considered by the city council for
passage, at a meeting to be held In
the council chamber in said city at 8
o'clock a. M, on the 18th day Of June.
1914. at which time the owners of
property subj sct to assessment for the
cost of the improvement contemplated
by the said resolution, may appear
before the said council and make OBJ
sections to the contemplated improve.
m snt,. and the passage OF the said PRO-
posed resolution, II any they have;
said resolution being Is follows:
Resolution No. 73o.
Be Is resolved, by the city council
of the city of Keokuk, Iowa:
That it is deemed advisable and
necessary to make improvements by
paving with concrete, the foundation
to be prepared and the paving to be
constructed in accordance with the
specifications to be prepared by the
city engineer, and approved by the
city council, the following named al
leys, to-wit: No. 125 and No. SO, city
The expense OF making said i'm
rrovements to be assessed against
the lots and parcels OF lane according
to the area So as to include one halt
of the privately owned property be.
tween said street improved and the
next street, whether such privately
owned property abuts upon said
street or not; but In no case shall the
privately owned property situat ID
more than $50 feet from the street SO
improved to be assessed. Said assess
ment to be made in accordance with
tbs law governing the same.
Be it further resolved. that the city
council will meet at 9 o'clock a. m,
on the 29th day Of June. 1914, in the
council chamber, In the city of Keo-
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-06-10
kuk, for the purpose of considering

kuk, for the purpose of considering
objections to the passags Of the said
Improvement, ut which hearing the
above resolution may Be amended
and passed, or passed rs proposed.
Be it further resolved. that the city
clerk be, and he is hereby instructed
to cause notice Of tendency OF the
above resolution and the time at
which tbs said proposed resolution
will be considered by this council,
and objections to the passage thereof
heard. to be published as provided by
law in two newspapers OF general
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-06-10

!, Mary. to Haydsa wilcox
e., .sitorship Of the Comment we
inc 10 - Harold Hanson with the
go 81. hat he VIII be 90 good g
Ho 81, y viii and bequeath Helen
.,S.,.ch.s secret. "Nsver have 9
- ~ get high grades" to Maud
pevero. * ~,n and
as..th Ted Elders exceptional
musical talent.
psstrice Williamson's bewitcnins
-. and coquettish ways we do Will
80 heoueath to Fay Brumbach.
sn y. do will and bequeath Russell
$3.50 famous hair tonic recips which
-, the hair smooth and shiny to
- rgin. who seems to be having
~ ,..t deal OF trouble in raising 9
pnpadour. 49,.
EVANS grand opera voice to Will
Il Tanning.
- frances McGaw We do win and
..,ua.th Eva Kunzmann's sweet dis
! position.
80, On We do will and bequeath to
heob Blom.
l,lhur Kirby's curly hair and affec-
...,te nature We do will and be-
.,..th TO Harold Hanson.
Is Helen Stebbins We do will and
h,aueath Nina Hodges shuklin walk.
4 Caroline Bode. Nina's favortte brand
Z, almost invisible face powder.
- John McManus. We do viii and
,..uaath Albert jenkins eloquent
and convincing speech. to be used by
John to comfort pretty girls with sad
h,,rts who might think that hs II not
true to them. Albert found this to
b his greatest necessity.
We do will and bequeath to Bessy
laws. Marjorie Moore's bashful quail
itiss especially with the boys. "a
reat need Of Bessie's).
Helen Gray's adorable smile and
winning ways we do will and bequeath
to Ruth Crane. Constant use Of both
i Il these will bring Ruth lovers by the
rnre.
h vitneas whereof I have here
n.c signed my name this zenith day
Il June, One Thousand Nine Hundred
md Fourteen. A. d.
The Class OF 1914.
WALTER e. NICHOLS.
On this tenth day OF June, One
Thousand Nine Hundred and Four
teen A. D., the class Of 1914 signed
the foregoing instrument In our pres
ence and declared the same to be its
last will and testament; and at It's
request and in its presence, and In
the presence of each other we here
unto subscribe our name as witnesses
that at said time the said class Of
Ons thousand Nine Hundred and
Fourteen was Of sound mind and
memory
GERARD HUSBAND. President.
WALTER SCHWARTZ, Secretary.
wn Aldrich.
A. B. Hughes.