The Birmingham age-herald., 1914-06-15
.HAMLETDESCR|BED BY ACOWPUNCHER Mighty Dry Show Is His
 Honest Opinion SORE ON HIS NAV" Thinks Ham" Had a Kick Coming. Hamlet's "Maw" Made "Old
 Man Boss of the
 Ranch
SORE ON HIS NAV"


 From the Kansas City Star.
 Wore late, Harve," began the old cattleman when Harve strolled into the hotel lobby on Sunday morning. "We gotter git train outen here be- fore noon"
 T overslept," explained Harve q went to hear this feller Western take the part of Hamlet last night. Con siderin' that we brung 'em in on a | Satterday market, we done well with them full feds, and I lowed I'd go to high brow show. We paid two bucks a seat, and I never want to see a fu- neral again."
 You mean Southern" corrected the old cattleman. His names Southern q guess so,'' said Harve, compla- gently. Looked like he was goin' to be every point in the compass fer while last night. He was caderverous guy the shade of a blond sourdough and wore dinky little black petticoat. i I low cowman in them times mustve been sight tryin' to tail a | that garb"
 They tell me- began the old cat | tleman.
 Seems this feller Hamlet wus sore on his maW," went on HarVe, Deckon- ing to a newsboy. She wus the Wid- der Hamlet and she married agin.' 1 "Widders hes a right to marry the second time" said the old cattleman. "The children most alters does git sore Pears like the children think any woman ought to be proud and content just being the parent of them"
 Ham Had Kick Coming Ham. had a kick comin', all right, la- old la1 al did show some onseemly haste at weddin' again. She hooks up with the old gents brother and didn't do a thing but make him boss of the ranch and never even gives Ham the privilege of bein' horse wrangler. Naturally Ham gifts sore. From what I could make out he run on his rope at the weddin chivari and wouldn't even say Well come home to his new paw"
 Looks like a likely COW puncher could git job most anywhere dis scented the old cattleman. Teller his lage ought to be ashamed to stick around the home corral and live off'n the old folks"
 "He wusn't no common COW puncher.' ' said Harve, carefully adjusting the silver band on his hat. He wus in the kine business and most of the throne layouts wuz full up on hands and foremen. Why he couldn't git job as straw boss. w ny QlQn | ne run lHc IidScIiCh Out I camp, then?" said the old cattleman looking up with interest. When the Wid- der Brown married again, Canadian Jim Bowen, he run the bridegroom clear into the next county just with quirt ] This fellow Hamlet"
 "Tm tellin' yer,' protested Harve, with an injured look Look like yore tryin . to eloocidate this here yarn and you never , seen the show. even."
 Go ahead, son. yawned the old cattle
 man, "whut come of Hamlet and the rest of the herd?'
 "OId Gent" Appears
 They held long conversations witf themselves.' said Hamlet. and frequent I got left behind in the. string-out. but from what could learn Hamlet and some
 friends in the night herd. they got me- , dium out from town and they held 8 . seance, and the old gent. he floats back from spiritland and he puts flea in theil
 yere. He claimed his wife and his broth
 CT had framed dirty deal on him and froze him out with the sin1ple expedient
 of dripping a few ounces of hot lead ir
 his ear one night. forty-fve making toe
 much noise. He ribbed Ham up to bring
 in a comeback on em. Ham he got tt
 studyin' over 1t and he got right grouchy
 at the hull bunch and picked fuss witt his girl Opheeley-'' |, | kHoWeu Il hiIl hdts'Ou >>Pt'CSiSy VNCi ! to the Turkey Track ranch" broke In tn, old cattleman. "6he took up with Three
 fingered Pete and they bought out tn. Flyin' w pla ce She uster-n ..
 Well, this wusn't that" said Harve
 crustily "These feliers wus mostly . Swedes. Opheeley's paw wus bald
 headed old cuss who wus tryin' to pla, both ends again the middle and stand
 in with young Ham and the old folks
 too He got his'n one night tryin tt hide in the bathroom and listen wher Ham come in to tell his may right plail . what he thought of her actions. Ophee
 ley's paw made false move and Han :, he sliced him with his bowie. They le that feller lie. around on the stage for al , hour before they called the undertaken V Hamlet he goes playhouse along afssl
 he and Opheelcy had the row, and thez