davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Calumet news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 1907-1938, 1914-05-16
TEAMS ALMOST ON PAR.
Challenging Poloists Are Announced
By Britons.

New York. May 16.-The. English
polo team as announced today con-
tains two players of top ranking; one
second division substitute and two
players Of third division rank. accord
ing to the English birmingham handi-
cap classification. Under the 1914
handicap list Captain Cheape and Ma
Jor Barrett are ten point play rank
ing i'm the Nottingham list with Cap
tain Ritson and Captain Lockett of the
1913 English team ANA the American
Big Four" consisting of II. T.. Whit
ney, Devereux Milburn, Lawrence Wa
terbury and j. VI. Waterbury.
Major Il. II. Mathew Iannowe who
is named as substitute play er, is a min"
point poloist. chasing with T.. NJ.
Freake, who played number = against
the American four last June. Captain
TomkinsOn and Major Bingham are
rated at eight i'm the Nottingham list,
which contains the names of % play
ers of this classification. This gives
an average of nine for the five players
in the ranking that includes 1000
rames. The team as named contains
but one former internationalist in Cap
tain Cheapc. who played on the Eng
lish teams of 1911 and 1913.
The opinion was general among
members Of the Long Island Polo col
ony today that while the ENGLISH team
was not as formidable as that of 1919
it compares favorably i'm playing
strength with the United States team,
which is likely to consist of the Water
bury brothers, Milburn and one player
yet To he selected TO replace Captain
combination, who has retired from ac-
tive play.
The Calumet news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 1907-1938, 1914-05-16
TO CALL THEM BY NAME.
How Names OF Foreign Cars and
Drivers Are Pronounced.

Indianapolis, May lG.-The pronun-
citation e. foreign names in the next
indianapolis vc-huudred mile race
has worried many motor bug to dis
traction For the benefit Of the minl-
tiated the following phonetic key IS
piven: Cars-Peugeot, Pay-Jo: De-
lagc. Day-Lawge. Drivers-GouN,
Goo; Boillot. Boil-O; Chassagne, Chas-
Saw-in; Guyot Gee-O. hard G.; Chris
tianns. Krees-Ti-An; Thomas. Toa-
Nah, and Friedrich. Freed Rish. which
is about as close to the German ch as
an American can get. All other for
c.gu names, including Mercedes, Isot-
Ia. Bugatti Duray ana Mazaucco, are
generally pronounced as English, with
out Improperly.
The Calumet news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 1907-1938, 1914-05-16
STAGE IS NOT
FOR ATHLETES
Coach Stage Expresses Himself
in UnmiStakable Terms

Chicago, May 1G-Athletes who dress
themselves In filmy draperies and i'm
pcrsonate female characters in Black
friar comic operas are in bad" with
Coach StaRg Of the University Of Chi
cas0. The directors opinion became
known yesterday in battle Of tenn
peraments at the campus over the de-
sertion Of track athletics for the lime
light 10y Pete Russell and Stellan WIN
drow Of the Maroon football squad.
Coach Stagg pasted a notice at Bart
lett gymnasium n month ago that ath-
letes who took part in The Student
Superior" the annual Blackfriar pro-
duction, would not be considered IA
candidate for the track team. Noting
the absence OF Russell and Window
from the track team, a Jealous under
graduate wrote a communication Il
the Daily Maroon, censuring Coach
Stage for alleged unfairness.
The director asserted that he would
enforce the rule i'm the case of Russell.
but that this was unnecessary, since
he had not been conforming to the
training rules.
Aside from the necessity of con-
forming TO certain rules of discipline"
said Coach Stag. II have a theory
and this is not meant as "a slam at the
Blackfriars-thatw wearing dresses and
living in an atmosphere which is cs-
sentially errcminate does not put iron
in the blood, and Is not conducive To
good athletics"
The Calumet news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 1907-1938, 1914-05-16
Federal League.

Pittsburgh. Pa. May l6.-Poor work
on the bases by Pittsburgh and OPP
perfume hitting by Kansas City gave
the latter team the game here yester-
day. Two of the five hits off Dick
son and Henderson came In the fifth
and these, coupled with sacrifice.
gave the visitors the only run of the
game. III T.
Kansas City ..O0OOl0000-1 l
Pittsburgh ....OOO 100 o
Batteries-Cullop and Easterly;
Dickson. Henderson and Berry.
Brooklyn, y. Y. May l6.--Brooklyn
defeated st. Louis here yesterday in
n ragged game. Pitchers We're liberal
with passes. hits were frequent, bat
ters were hit and each team was guilty
of errors. II II T.
BROOKLYN ..205iO4O0x-l2 II >
St Louis E. ..0203O o. 6 4
Batteries-Vcrnon. LATTE and
Land; Groom, Herbert, Welch and ST.
mon.
Buffalo. y. Y, May l6-'IIendrix held
Buffalo tn two hits yesterday giving
Chicago the second game from Buff
falo Moran was hit freely and was
taken out of the box in the sixth In
ming when Chicago scored four runs.
Hendrix made a home run in the third.
r II T.
Buffalo -. 900 ? 0
Chicago :. ...O0l024 5000 10 :
Batterics-,Moran, Brown and Blair;
Hendrix and Wilson.
Baltimore. Md. May l6.--Walshs
hit over the left field fence in the
eighth won the game for Baltimore
from Indianapolis here yesterday.
Suggs and Falkenberg pitched good
ball. the latter striking out eight men
Manager Knabe of Baltimore was put
out of the game ana fined for disput-
ing n decision. II III T.
Baltimore =. II 100000 1X-2 2
indianapolis O000-1 .
Batteries-Suggs and Russell; Falk-
enberg and Rariden.
The Calumet news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 1907-1938, 1914-05-16
PLACE BASEBALL BETS.
Curb Brokers Wager on Total Runs
Durinu Day.

New York. May l6.-Curb brokers
are making 1ncir baseball bets these
days as if they were dealing in stocks.
II YOU walk through Broad street and
listen 10 the tumble of shouts and in
terchanges of stock transactions you'll
occasionally hear sometime like this:
bid LOCO -. ~ At a."
Offer 1000 %. L. at -.
Each of those mysterious ciacun-
tions means an offer to make a base
BAH bet. The rate of betting is -
cents per leo bid or offered. So a bid
OF 1000 means bet Of $50.
The bets O. u. are made on a basis
of the total number Of runs scored in
any single day by all the teams i'm the
two big leagues of organized baseball.
The American and National. Hence Il
man bids a. when he expects the teams
To- make a total of a. runs or more.
The Calumet news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 1907-1938, 1914-05-16
National League.

Chicago, ILL.,, May 1G.-Brooklyn bat
ted all three of Chicago's pitchers OPP
portunely yesterday, ran cleverly on
the bases, took advantage of each To-
cal mistake and won. Pfeffer, al
though hit hard, pitched his best ball
in the pinches. IL ii T.
BROOKLYN 49,. % 030O010j-l2 Is .
Chicago -. ..l00020l0l- > II 6
NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS. and Miller; Law
ender, label. HUMPHREYS and Bresna-
ham, Two-base hits--Dalton. Cutshaw,
Brooi:lyn; Leach, Good, Sweeney, Zim-
norman, Schultz. Chicago.
Cincinnati. Ohio, May l6.-Cincin-
natl outbatted and outheded Boston
yesterday. Maranville had an off day
in the field. making -four errors. Ying-
ling pitched excellent ball up to the
ninth. when an error and two singles
let in two runs. Il ii II
Boston -. 80 90 0 % 30 - q
R,atteres--Crutcher, strand and
Gowdy Whaling; Yingling and Clark.
Two-base hit--Vaughn. wolnitz. Gin
cinnati.
Pittsburgh. Pa, May l6.--New York
hit McQuillan hard in the first five in
nirLs yesterday and won from the To-
Gals. Harmon relieved McQuillan in
the sixth and finished the game In good
style. Larry Doyle is still ont of the
game with tonsilits and Marquard
was reported u victim of the same all
ment yesterday. II VI II
New York =. O0O230OOO-5 IL
Pittsburgh ..O10O110O0-3 .
Batteries Mathewson and Meyers;
McQuillan. Harmon and Gibson. Two
base hit--Snodgrass. New York: Hy-
att, Carey. Konetchy. Pittsburgh.
ST. Louis. Mo-, May i5.-St. Louis
won from Philadelphia yesterday
through the wildness of Jacobs and by
punching hits and taking advantage OF
the visitors errors. st. Louis scored
two runs i'm the third when Cruise
singled after twelve successive balls
had filed the bases. r III II
Philadelphia 30 0000l 20-3 8
ST Louis -. ..0020O400x-6 10 I
Battcries-Jacobs. Marshall and
Killifer, Doom: Griner. Sallee and Sny-
der Two-base hits--IIuggins. St
Lotas; Devore, Burns. Philadelphia,
The Calumet news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 1907-1938, 1914-05-16
AUSTRALIA IS
BOXING CENTER
Activity of Snowy Baker Leads
to Practical Monopoly

San Francisco, Cal. May 16.-Aus-
tralia claims that It Is now the boxing
center of the world. Snowy Baker with
his Stadium company has established
a boxing trust that has either forced
or brought out all rivals and that can
now pay unlimited sums to get the
greatest championship matches.
-Four, six and ten-round contests
have never taken root in Australia.
says sydney publication. "All con-
tests are over the fun long distance
route of twenty rounds and this fact,
combined with the enterprise shown
by Snowy Bakers company and the
whole hearted support given by the
public To clean, well conducted boxing
contests, seems surely To indicate that
Australia is rapidly becoming the
worlds principal convincing ground
As the worlds principal convincing
ground" Australia should see little
fun as soon as all the worlds best
boxers are convinced that Mr.. Baker,
money is the real article.
The last competition" says the cor
respondent. has been eliminated by
the absorption Of the olympic Athlet-
ie club. Both big stadiums in sydney
will he run by Stadiums. Ltd, In flu
ture. This gives Bakers stadiums alb
solute control of boxing in sydney,
Melbourne, Brisbane and Adelaide, the
four largest cities in Australia. The
resources of the controlling company
are very great and there is no enter
u1iSn 100 him for IL La hanlln.
The Calumet news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 1907-1938, 1914-05-16
SEA SICKNESS RESPONSIBLE.
Crawford Demonstrates II Cleared His
Battnc Eye.

Chicago May l6.--Samuel Crawford
visited with President Comiskey the
other day. The two were seated in the
private office Of the south-sidc mag
nate, Ginning. The subject was the
trip around the world, of course. 1t
will be remembered that sam was a
member of the White Sox hand for
those few months.
We'll, you seem To he hitting them
pretty good this year" said Commy.
Yep" admitted Crawford. You
know think that trip around the
world did me lot of good. Know
whcic | think ! was benefited most
Nope" from the old Roman.
while was the sickest. don't
believe that any fellow was ever ~
sea sick ms | was. It's my private
opinion that no man ever spent as
much time bending over the ships rail
hut say. il certainly did clear my eye
well. don't prove It this afternoon"
from Comiskcy.
I'm going to do my best to prove
It," from Samuel.
lie did He swattcd four drives aud
50 nrcd three runs. one of his hits was
"A terrific thrce-bageer that WAS just
over the heads of the inficlders. There
was So much force behind IL that il
was just over the heads of the out
ficlders. too. II didn't drop an inch IN
it's niglt until 1t bumped the right
field fence. IL certainly was n swat
IT'S "a certainty there is nothing tho
matter with Sans eye" commented
ComiskcN.
The Calumet news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 1907-1938, 1914-05-16
COLDS ARE EXPENSIVE.
Johnson Testifi.s He Was Fined For
Contracting One.

Chicago, H., May 16.--Colds are lux
urles in the National league. Some
come as high as 800.
That is what George II. ChieD
Johnson, the Indian pitcher. stated in
IN affidavit, read in United States Dis
lfict Judge Foelps court on Thursday.
Johnson accused August Garry Herr
mann Of ilning him 500 because he
"o2ht cold and had to sit on the
bench, shortly after his return from
III" southern spring training trip. the
allegation was denied in. counter aiil-
daNit fled b. Hermann.
The Calumet news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 1907-1938, 1914-05-16
HERRESHOFF AND
OWNER CHANGE SAIL
PLAN OF RESOtUTE

Bristol u. l.. May l6--Changes in
the racing rigging az the cup defend r
candidate Resolute will prevent fur
Their trial spins for several days.
The Resolute has had three sail
trials in Narragansett bay. during
which her designer. Nat Herresholf.
and the managing owner, II. w. En-
mons. md, have made a critical study
of her performances and have decided
upon certain changes i'm her rig.
The Calumet news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 1907-1938, 1914-05-16
O'TOOLE NOT FOR SALE.
Barney Dreyfuss Has High Estimate
of His Value.

Pittsburgh Pa, May lG.-Barncy
Drcyfuss, president ot the Pittsburgh
Nationals. declared recently that de-
spite the fact that Marty O'Toolc, ia
nous $4,000 hurler has shown very
little big league class since the Pirates
bought him. he would not sell the
pitcher for twice the price paid for
him
Marty pitched but one exhibition
game during the spring training. and
that was at Kansas city. whore the
Blues laced him for six hits and five
runs i'm two innings.
The Calumet news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 1907-1938, 1914-05-16
:. :. . : :. :. :. :. :. :. 3 i. :. :. = :.
:. WITH THE BOXERS. :.
:. :. j. : :. :. :. :. :. : :. :. :. :. :. !:

Louisiana the Philadelphia ban
tamwcight. is n white man His name
is lavigne.
Freddie Welsh. English lightweight
champion, and Jack Triton are To-
meet in New York May 30.
Johnny Dundee is going to Los An
gcles soon in the hope Of meeting Joe
Rivers or Johnny Kilhanc.
The sam Langford- Smith
bout. scheduled To take place in Lon
don next month. has been cancelled
because OF the popular lisapproval ~
matches between white and negro pu-
g.lists.
The Calumet news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 1907-1938, 1914-05-16

balls and errors by the visitors. Bush
took Shawkeys place in the fifth and
in the last five innings, Cleveland
could not get a man to first base.
X III II
Cleveland 030O000--3
Philadelphia ...0202 / 00x-6 o
Notwithstanding. Gregg. Beck
and Carisch; Shawkey, Bush and
Lapp, Schang. Two-base hit--kopf.
philadelphia.
The Calumet news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 1907-1938, 1914-05-16
NO CHANGE FOR FEDS.

chicago, May l6.--"Therc will he IN
'hah-oS in the Federal league circuit
'hlS year." was the authoritative state
m"nt issued by President James \.
"llin"re of the Federal league today In
answer To the reports that the Kansas
Wy team would be transferred I'll
''HcVue, KY. just across the river
lrCm Cincinnati
The Calumet news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 1907-1938, 1914-05-16
NJ ationaI League.

Boston at Cincinnati.
Brooklyn ut Chicago.
New York at Pittsburgh.
Philadelphia at st. Louis.
The Calumet news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 1907-1938, 1914-05-16
Fedora. League.
TODAY'S GAM ES.
American League.

Chicago AT Philadelphia.
st. Louis at New York.
Detroit at Boston.
Cleveland at Washington.
The Calumet news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 1907-1938, 1914-05-16
Federal Leauue

Kansas City at Pittsburgh.
indianapolis at Baltimore
st. Louis at Brooklyn.
Chicago at Buffalo.
The Calumet news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 1907-1938, 1914-05-16
American Association.

Cleveland 8: Minneapolis -
Columbus 10: Kansas city 4.
Louisville 8: Milwaukee ..
indianapolis 8: ST. Paul 3.
The Calumet news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 1907-1938, 1914-05-16

Three base hit--Paskert, Philadelphia,
Home run--Wilson. ST. Louis.
The Calumet news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 1907-1938, 1914-05-16
IE3VVS SPORTS

I. i. !. i. !. :. i. + + = {. !. 1; :. !.
The Palatka news and advertiser. [volume] (Palatka, Fla.) 1908-19??, 1914-04-24
What Intelligent Effort viii Do

{. A. Rice Of Kingston, N. Y, who
las been spending the winter in Pa
latka and is still here, spent four
wears in government employ in the
Canal zone. He has many interest
ing stories of his experiences there
and in the Philippines. The Isthmus
Of Panama, once a pest hole, he says,
is now an all the year round resort,
and no city in this country equals il
for for healthfulness The govern
went cleaned it up. 1t was not mere
ly swat the fly campaign, it was
81 obstruction Of the breeding places
Of teiS, mosquitoes and other pests
There was no choice given persons
who neglected requests as to the pen
atty. Those who failed to respond
to orders were fined ten days in the
cleanup gang. The first offense
was suspended but if repeated, the
penalty was doubled, and no excep-
ton was made to rich or poor. The
death rate was reduced from the
maximum, and the whole zone is now
a model for the world. He says with
united individual effort in Palajka it
could be made a model city for Flor
ida. The fly and mosquito are most
serious enemies and responsible for
more distress and cost to human be-
ings than from any other known pre-
ventive cause.
The Palatka news and advertiser. [volume] (Palatka, Fla.) 1908-19??, 1914-04-24

Mrs. Mary Coughlin died a Their
home in st. Augustine Tuesday night
at the age of 60 years, after a long
illness The funeral was held from
the Cathedral Thursday morning at
9 o'clock with mass. Intrmnt at San
Lornez cemetery.
Mrs. Couglin is survived by one
son, Mr.. Dave Coughlin of this city,
and two daughters, Miss Ada Cough
lin and Mrs. Copeland.
Mr.. and Mrs. Dave Coughlin left
for st. Augustine Wednesday to at
tend the funeral.
a The remains of Mrs. Faulk- Allen
were brought to this city yesterday
and inferred in West View cemetery.
Mrs. Allen was a resident of Palatka
for number of years and OF one
time owner and proprietress of the
Arlington Hotel.
The Palatka news and advertiser. [volume] (Palatka, Fla.) 1908-19??, 1914-04-24
Growers and Shippers League.

Lloyd C. Tenney of Orlando, sec
rotary of the Florida Growers and
Shippers League, has called his first
annual meeting at Palatka on April
goth. Many important question to
growers and shippers will be discuss
ed, and coming as the meeting does
in connection with the State Hort,cul-
tural Society, it ought to be largely
attended. The incorporation of the
league will be completed and an exec
utive committee of nine members
elected to act as the governing body
for the coming year, The question
of establishing local associations OF
the league in different localities will
be leading topic discussed.
The Palatka news and advertiser. [volume] (Palatka, Fla.) 1908-19??, 1914-04-24

Mrs. Norman Rifles entertained a
large party at bridge on Tuesday ef.
ternoon.
The Ladies aid of the Presbyter-
ian church will hold cake sale at the
Ackerman-Stewart drug store on
May 25th, starting at 9 o'clock.
j. W. Harrison, the merchant Of
Denver was in the city Wednesday en-
route to Miami, where he goes to pay
a visit to his daughter.
Rev. S. l. Hendrix of Crescent City
is attending the meeting of the Meth
odist District Conference in the city
this week.
Mrs. Park Trammell will accompa-
ny the Governor to Palatka when he
comes to make the address on Me-
mortal day. While here, Mrs. Tram
nell will be the guest Of Mrs. S. J.
Hilbtrn.
Her F. Babers was in the city Tues
day making arrangements for his
campaign for representative in the
legislature. Up to the present time
Mr. Babers has been too much Occu-
pied with his private business affairs
to do much work in the campaign.
The board of trade has received
information that President Harrison
of the Southern Railway, and also of
the G. S. & F. Road will be in PalaU-
ka next Monday. Mr.. Harrison is
making a trip over his line through
cut the south, which covers some TO-
600 miles, and our city being termi-
nal of one of his important allied
lines, naturally comes in for recogni-
ton.
Sunday is Memorial Day and the
committee desires that all school
children of the city meet at the foot
of Lemon street at 3 p. M; also all
the veterans of the Confederacy and
the Palatka Military band. From
there a procession will form and
march to West View cemetery. All
who will donate flowers for decorat-
ing the graves are requested to
leave them on Saturday afternoon at
Mrs. H. A. Gray's.
Messrs. L. l. Stephens, H. H. Bry-
ant, John Dallow, Capt. Packard and
L. j. Mcleod, all prominent Wela-
kans, were in the city on Wednesday.
Miss Winnifred Haughton enter
tanned the North End Bridge club
Monday afternoon, having one guest
table besides the regular members.
Mrs. Aston Halle won the prize at
this table and Mrs. H. NJ. Fearnside
and Mrs. Norman Riles were success
full at the other tables. An ice cream
course was served at the conclusion
of the game Among Miss Haugb-
toms guests were Miss Louise Gowcn
of Crescent City and Miss Margue-
rite Corcoran of Saginaw, Mich.
The members of the West End five
hundred club were delightfully."- enter
tanned at pansy luncheon by Mrs.
Julian c. Calhoun Saturday after
noon. The pretty score cards were
the artistic work of the hostess, and
the pansy motif was carried out in
detail. After the game the guests
were invited into the dining room,
when an elaborate luncheon was
served. The table formed a beauti-
full picture, with a lovely arrangement
of pansies as a centerpece, and a
bouquet of the pretty flowers at each
place. Suspended above the center
was a huge bow of soft white tulle,
from which graceful streamers We're
arranged to form canopy, the tulIe
being caught at intervals with bunch
es of pansies, and lavishly showered
with the single blossoms. Mrs. Cal
houn was assisted in entertaining her
guests by her mother, Mrs. A. G. Phil
lips, and Mrs. R. H. Phillips.
The Palatka news and advertiser. [volume] (Palatka, Fla.) 1908-19??, 1914-04-24
A Putnam County Canning Areni

Miss Agnes Ellen Harris, State
Agent for Girls Canning and Garden
ing Clubs, was in Palatka on Monday
and appointed Miss Jessie Burton of
Crescent City, agent for this county.
Miss Burton has been busy in Palatka
this week interviewing the 20 or more
girls of our city who are engaged in
cultivating tomatoes, and will visit
other points in our county in the next
week or two. Miss Burton has had
a good deal of experience in garden
ing and takes to it naturally, and ac-
cordingly promises to make good in
the new field of work she has under
taken
The Palatka news and advertiser. [volume] (Palatka, Fla.) 1908-19??, 1914-04-24
The Swimming POOL

at the Saratoga Hotel is
now open for the Season.
Large pool with Dressing
Rooms. Splendid way to
refresh body and mind after
a hot day. Adults IS cents,
including new suits and
towels; Children 10 cents.
l. JACOBSON, Proprietor.
The Palatka news and advertiser. [volume] (Palatka, Fla.) 1908-19??, 1914-04-24
Honest SUNRISE.

King Lear is great character"
remarked the friend
Yes, answered the actor Il sup
pose you remember my performance
last SEASON."
NO, | must confess have never
seen you in the part"
Indeed" was the rejoinder. in a
tone of gentle surprise. Then how on
earth did You know it was great
character:' Liverpool Mercury.
The Palatka news and advertiser. [volume] (Palatka, Fla.) 1908-19??, 1914-04-24

Saint Marks Church.
Divine service-Holy Communion
7 a. M; morning prayer, II a. m.
Evensong, 1880 p. M; Sunday school
10 a. m.
The Palatka news and advertiser. [volume] (Palatka, Fla.) 1908-19??, 1914-04-24
VIM. WILLIE, Pastor.
/ SPECIAL MESSAGE TO THE


am closing out beautiful line Of
Embroidery at half the real price.
ANY one in need Of this goods will
find it to their interest to come in
and take advantage of this opportu-
nifty.
KATE L. LUCAS.
The day book. [volume] (Chicago, Ill.) 1911-1917, 1914-08-04
cocKNEY REPARTEE

A young gentleman with a very
plain face and rather annoyed be-
cause his view of the stage was OBJ
structed by the hat of a pretty girl
who was sitting in front of him in the
gallery of a London music-hall. Wish
ing to get a glimpse of the perform
ance, he p1ucked up courage and, in
a nervous voice, exclaimed: "See
here, miss, l want to look as well as
you" ooh, do yer?" she replied in
a rich cockney accent, as she turned
round and looked at him square in
the eye. Then you'd better run 'ome
and change yer face"
The day book. [volume] (Chicago, Ill.) 1911-1917, 1914-08-04
SOME SOLDIER

The captain saw young soldier
trying to cook his breakfast with
badly-made fire. Going to him, he
showed him how to make a quick
cooking fire, saying:
Look at the time you are wasting.
Wren was in the Philippines l often
have to do about two miles in the
jungle, shoot my food, skin or pluck
it, then cook and eat it, and return to
the camp under the half-hour." Then
he unwisely added: "Of course you
have heard of the Philippines?"
Eyes, SIR replied the young sol
der, "and also of Ananias and Bar
on Munchausen, too"