davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1914-07-24
ARE HAPPY
HOW THE BRlTlSHER GETS HIS
GREATEST SATISFACTION.
Writer Probes Mysteries Of Numer.
QUE Complalnts-Safety Valves for
~Disoruntled Found In Newspa-
pers, Public Officials, Etc.

Just as the proverbial old lady wa.
never happy unless she was miserable
so the average Britisher extracts hi
greatest satisfaction from a downright
honest growl, says q writer in London
Answers.
No one can justiiably call US a ma
ton Of grumblers. and yet on every
hand we hear complaints, loud and
penetrating. 1t is u right and pre-
rogative to growl. and growl we dc,
as a kind Of habit.
The baby growls because its clothes
are too tight or Its bottle not up to
schedule time in its appearance. The
child growls because bedtime arrives
too o Schoolboys and school.
girls are inseparable from growls, and
the adult wades cheerily through q
perfect sea of them, Old age, again.
Is only too frequently typifed from be-
ginning to end as one reverberating
grumble.
In the curious psychology Of the hu-
mar race there Is not to equal the Joy
of a growl well aired. You feel ter
rfbly angry because the sos train
from the city to your home has run
late for nearly a week. and you write
. singing, v~irulent, %scorching, crush
ing letter TO the manager of the par
ticular railway company entangled in
your wrath. All the time you know
full we'll that the manager keeps a
kind Of tame, s~hellbacked, armor plat
ed assistant whk will contentedly post
You q cold acknowledgment and drop
your complaint into the waste paper
basket. You understand all this quite
clearly, and yet you are satisfied, for
the writing Of that vitriolic letter has
put you right with yourself.
Growls are just safety valves for
over-wrought feelings. Picture the
old lady who writes q frantic letter
to the local newspaper anent the pau
city of policemen In her quaint su-
burban backwater. Seeing her fam
ing words In the majesty of print, she
marshals each paragraph as an mag
mary constable guarding her life and
property. Her efforts have brought
her both Joy and security, but were
she to analyze the matter she would
realize that she has merely fattered
herself into the belief that her mighty
missive has set in motion the police
the county, while, as a matter of
fact, no one takes any notice.
OF all the vast army of GROWERS,
the farmer Is surely the worst Of
He complains IL the sun is
not shining in one field, rain falling
another. and gentle, drying breezes
are not blowing In a third-all sim
And after the farmer, COM
mend me to the amateur gardener.
Public officials, were they not thick
skinned, would all be made subjects
for the lunacy commissioners by the
frequency with which growls rain
upon them. Editors Of all classes of
papers come in for many grumblers,
and the reverend gentlemen who act
as u spiritual advisers get more
han their share Of circulating com
Everybody, from the belated errand
boy with the groceries to the most
politician, earns opprobrium
rom someone. and the people who
srowl most are usually those who are
lappiest. for their pent-up feelings
lave full play and outlet.
Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1914-07-24
Bless the Ladies'.

Our congressional committee heard
30 ladies in two hours. That many
men could have kept us listening for
several days."
THAT shows that women can trans
act public business. But how did
they manage to crowd 30 speeches
Into two hours?"
"Oh, they spoke three and four at
a time. '-Kansas City Journal.
Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1914-07-24
An Apostle Choice.

Bishop Evans Tyree at a dinner in
Nashville was asked II he had any
idea Of preaching on the new fashions
the backless evening gown, slashed
skirt and 30 forth.
NO." said the bishop, such an idea
has not occurred to me. If, however, |
should preach on the new fashions I
would assuredly choose my text from
Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1914-07-24
Our Statesmen.

Ambrose Bierce, the brilliant satir-
list, gave. at q dinner in Washington, q
few political definitions.
"A conservative" said Mr.. Bierce,
lis a statesman who Is enamored Of
existing evils, while a radical would
replace them with others"
Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1914-07-24
RUB-MY-TlSM

viii cure your rheumatism and all
kinds of aches and pains-Neuralgia,
Cramps. Collie, Sprains, Bruises, Cuts,
Old Sores, Burns, etc. Antlseptio
Anodyne. Price 25c.-Adv.
Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1914-07-24
How To Give QulnIne To cbiIdr.u

FEBRILINE Is the trademark name given TO an
improved ouinine. is q Tasteless Syrup. pleas
ant to take and does not disturb she stomach.
Children take 1t and never know Il is Ouinine.
Also especially adapted to adults who cannot
take ordinary Quinine. Does not nauseate nor
cause nervousness nor ringing In the head. Try
II the next time you need Quinine for any pur-
pose. Ask TOR aounce original package. The
nams FEBRILINE is blown IN bcttie, as c.nt~
Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1914-07-24

Cures Old Sores, Other Remedies Won't Cure,
The worst eAses. no matter Of how long standing.
are cured by the wonderful. old reliable DR..
Porser's Antiseptic Healing OIL Il relieves
Pain and Heais at the came time. 2sc, Soc, d Lea
Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1914-07-24
COULD NOT
STAND ON FEET
Mrs. Baker So Weak-Coulds
Not Dc Her Work-Found
Relief In Novel Way.
Adrian, Mich. -" suffered terribly
with female weakness and backache am

got 80 e that Z
could hardly do MP
work. When I
washed my dishes I
had to SIT down an
when ! would sweep,
the floor ! would gse-
DO weak that woul&
to get o drink.
every few Minutes.
and before I did my
busting Iwould have,
lie down. I QuA
Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1914-07-24
Not EntierIy Gone.

Church--They say horses have all
been banished from the street rail-
roads In Berlin.
Gotham-Yes, but you'll still find 'em
on the menus.
Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1914-07-24
No Relief.

Did you send away that ill.tem-
pered, growing dog to the pound?"
Yes. but 1t doesn't help things
much. can't send my husband there.
too"
Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1914-07-24
LADIES CAN wEAR SHOES

One size smaller after using Aliens Foot Ease, the
Antiseptic powder to be shaken into the shoes. 1t
makes tight or new shoes feel easy. Just the thing
for dancing. Refuse substitutes. For FREE trial
package, address Allen s. Olmsted, Leroy, N. Y.
Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1914-07-24
Short Memory.

Father-Why, son, you've grown an
other foot since you went off to col
lege.
Son-No, father, you forget; I had
two feet when | left home.
Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1914-07-24
His Wish.

She during the quarreD-I only
married you to spite Fred Johnson.
He (ruefully)-I wish to heaven
you'd married Fred johnson to spite
me.
Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1914-07-24

Somehow the man who attends
strictly to his own business never &C.
quires a reputation as an entertaining
conversationalist.
Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1914-07-24
Suits TAS-IT HiuuidD,

A New Discovery the result of years of
scientific research by the highest medical
authority for positive and almost instant
relief for all Headaches, Nervousness, Indi-
g~estion, Pains or Neuralgia. It's Wonder
full. Contains No Opiate. ADV.
Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1914-07-24
A Woman's Opinion.

Mistress-Haven't you any refer
ences?
Maid-I have, but they're like my
photographs-none Of them do me
Justice.
Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1914-07-24

The nan who thinks he Is marrying
an angel in disguise occasionally dis
covers later that the alleged disguise
was permanent
Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1914-07-24

Your druggist will refund money II PAZO
OINTMENT fails to cure any case OF Itching,
Blind Bleeding or Protrudine Piles In 6 to II days.
The Grss application Gives Ease and Rest. SOC.
Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1914-07-24

YOUR OWN DRUGGIST WILL. TELL YOU
Try Murine nye Remedy, for Rcd, Weak Mqtery
just Rye comfort. Write for Book OF ths, I'VE
by mail Free. Murine Rye Remedy Co., Chicago.
Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1914-07-24

Revenge Is sweet only to the very
small Individual.
Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1914-07-24

Ne Kick Coming From Mule.
Is that your muller" asked the m1
going fishing.
NYassir," said the colored man, NJ
was sitting on a log by the road
Does he hck?"
Deed, mistuh. he amt got no ca1sA
to kick. Hes gittin' his own waT
right along. I'm de n OATS havAR
de worry an difficulty"
Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1914-07-24

The Old Standard Groves Tasteless
chill Tonic is equally valuable as q
General Tonic because It contains the
well known tonic properties of QUIN1NE
and IRON. 1t acts on the Liver, Drives
out Malaria. Enriches the Blood and
Builds up the Whole System. so cents.
Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1914-07-24

The real secret of happiness d -
let the other fellow do the worryinR.
Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1914-07-24
Both imposed lJnor

Deserted Wife Ceiling grocer hel
troubles)-And l trusted him SO.
Grocer-Confound it! So did 7
Macon beacon. [volume] (Macon, Miss.) 1859-1995, 1914-07-24
Rotation Of Tools.


Your garden viii be late"
I'm afraid SO; but you see IT,
,Bradleys are still using FOlsomS
spade and hoe."-Boston Transcript
The gazette-times. [volume] (Heppner, Or.) 1912-1925, 1914-12-24
HOME AND FARM MAGAZINE SECTION SERIAL
A Fool and His Money--By George Barr McCutcheon
Copyright M @nB Mmm

BROKE In rashly. IF you please. Mr.
Titus. be good enough to keep your tenn
per. | have no desire to appear harsh and
arbitrary. but I can see that it is necessary
10 speak nlainly. There isn't anything In the
world / will not do to help you and the
countess In this unfortunate business, Mrs.
Titus. hope You believe me when | say as
mueh. am her friend; want to be yours
II YOU will let me. But | reserve the right
to say what shall he and what shall not be
done as long as YOU are under my roof. Just
a moment. MIR. Titus! | think we are quite
agreed that YOUR sister is to depart from
mere on the fourteenth of the month. ] am
TO be her escort, so to speak. for a consider
anle distance. In company with Mr.. Bangs.
wei. II must be clearly understood that not
one of YOU is to show his or her face out
SIDE these walls until after that Journey Is
over. That's plain-speaking. isn't III"
Il shall go where l please. and I'll go to
no farther for the reason that his mother,
seeing that | was desperately In earnest.
gave vent to a little cry of alarm and
clutched her big son by the shoulder. She
begged him to listen to reason!
Reason" he gasped.
III you-or any of you-put a foot out
side these walls ! declared, you will not
by crlckyr' fell in %fervent admiration
from the lips Of jasper, Jr, ! glanced at his
beaming. astonished face. He positively was
grinnlng! Good for you! You're a wonder:
Mr.. Smart! BY cricky! And you're dead
right. We're darn fools!"
Jasper" Rasped Mrs. Titus.
Good for you. .Jasper!" l cried warmly.
and took the hand he proffered.
"Colingraft. please take me to my room"
the mother. IL feel faint.
Send for Aline. Ask Mr.. Bangs to come to
me at once"
l bowed stiffly. II am sorry, Mrs. Titus.
to have been 30 harsh. so assertive--'
She held up both hands. Il never was so
spoken to in all my life, Mr.: Smart. l
shall not forget II to my dying day"
She walked away from me, her nretty
head held high and. her chin suspiciously
aquiver. Colingraft fastened after her. but
not without giving me a stare in which
rage and wonder struggled for the mastery.
I ran my hand over my moist brow.
Gee" said Jasper. Jr. You've corked
her all right. all right" He followed me
into the study and | couldn't get rid of him
for hours.
Later in the forenoon the Countess. with
a queer little smile on her lips, told me
that her mother considered me the most
wonderful. the most f~orccful character she
had ever encountered. l frightened up at
that.
But Colingraft was not yet through with
me-.
The gazette-times. [volume] (Heppner, Or.) 1912-1925, 1914-12-24
XVII.
/ See to the Bottom Of Things.

He sought me out lust before luncheon.
I was in the courtyard. listening patiently
10 Jasper. Jr.'s theories and suggestions
concerning the restoration OF the entire
facade of the castle. and what he'd do IL he
were In nv place. Strange to say, l was
considerably entertained: he was not at AZ
IDEAS in a pleasantly ingenious way, always
supplementing them with some such salve
as: Don't YOU think so, Mr.. Smart?' or
Pm sure YOU have thought OF 1t yourself
or isn't that your idea. too" OF you've
done wonders with the Joint, old man"
Colingraft came directly UP to. where we
were standing. There was trouble In mis-
'See here. Mr.. Smart" he began austereiy.
1--WE got something to say 10 YOU, and I'm
not tho sort to put 1T on appreciate
sort OF thing. but your manner today has
been intolerable. and we've got TO come to
an understanding"
eyed him closely. II suppose you're
about to suggest that one Of the other OF
us must-evacuate--get out. so TO speak. y
said I.
mother bawllng her eyes out upstairs and
wishing she were dead. You've got to come
off this high horse Of YOURS: You've got to
apologize to her. and damned quick. at that.
Understand
Nothing will give me greater joy than to
offer her my most AFFECT apology, Mr..
Titus unless It would be her unqualified
forgiveness"
'vu' law
Ill withoraw " bar nStt,ns a loot out
matum in respect 10 ner nuttIne y ,oo' Wv
side these walls: lhat sun s,aHus'
y beg 10 oiiler WIN wv. ,... Il. a..
You may neg 'hi Aou'e ''1eh d" Wv
face said ! coolly.
He swallowed nara hls race '"i'che''
and his hands were clenched.
You are nrettV much OF y nue. .T ~,
smart he sara; hetWeen ns ,ee,n' nas
sorry my sister mas taheh mo wv ,rt.h
The worst OF " Is. she seems sa'S,Isn VIZ
everything YOU 90, 1000 Loro, wh snsion
can see IN you IS oesoho ny nno,ect var
irotec,ioh. VIZ ohiopan !, ~
Are you trying 10 Insult me mr.. MS
You couldn't resent II II / Were, r,nros
backbone ,,on,. ..,r+
wait! YOU hre nef nro'n 80 unr ra.n
TO have trouble WIN you, but II Epu nerp
on in this strain MT Ii,us; ! sha'i oe eo"-
PEELED 70 thresn you s .9h -as, ,rom hs
He fairly Gasped. III tnIesn me' "e
choked out Then ne auVanceo; ,,,nu~
Much TO his SURPRISE uhu; etransslt
enough, not to my own ualtea 10 re',ea',
Instead, extended my 'ert Iist WIN con- M
The gazette-times. [volume] (Heppner, Or.) 1912-1925, 1914-12-24

lTo Be C|ontinued,)
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1914-12-04
RESOLUTION
STATE TAX CONFERENCE

morning returned from Indianapolis
where he has been attending the In
diana state tax conference in the
Claypool hotel in that city Wednes-
day and Thursday, as a delegate to the
conference from the Mishawaka
Chamber Of Progress. Mr.. Parks in
trOduced a resolution in behalf Of the
organization OF this city favoring taxa
ton OF all franchises and amending
the law so that street railway fran
chises Will be taxed. No action was
taken in the matter by the conference
but a general resolution was passed by
the committee requesting the appoint
ment of a committee representing all
the various interests of the state to
formulate needed tax legislation.
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1914-12-04
BENJAMIN DE GROOTE
SUCCUMBS TOPARALYSIS
Was Past IS Years of Age and
Had Been Resident of COun-
ty for so YearS-Taken Ill
Thursday Night.

Benjamin DeGrOOte, who was sud
denly stricken with a serious attack
of paralysis Thursday evening died at
$3.50 o'clock Friday morning at st.
Joseph's hospital. Mr. DeGroote had
been enjoying fair health for several
years and his sudden illness and death
was entirely unexpected by his family.
Mr.. DeGrOOte had been a resident OF
this community for the past 80 years,
coming here from his old home in
Belgium. He had lived for several
years at his rural home on Margaret
St, just north of the city. Mr.. De
Groote was born in Belgium Feb. %,
1929 and was past 50 years old.
He is survived by his wife, Mary De
Groote, two sons, Rev. J. K. DeGroOte,
rector of st. Patrick's Catholic church
of South Bend, and Charles j. De
Groote of this city, one step-daught
Mrs. l. V. Roy of this city, ana two
brothefs, Fred and Charles. also of
this city.
The funeral will be held Monday
morning at 9 o'clock from St Jo-
seph's Catholic church. Father De
Groote, his son, will officiate. Burial
Will be in st. Joseph's Catholic Gem
etery. The remains may be viewed
between and 3 o'clock Sunday at
ternoon at the residence of Mr.. and
Mrs. l. V. Roy, of 209 Lincoln way
west.
The Christian church Sunday school
orchestra will meet this evening with
q. A. Maurer, 301 Edgewater drive.
A large attendance is expected.
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1914-12-04
WORK ON UNION ST. ROAD
WILL Be DISCONTINUED
For Season Saturday-NeW
Main Highway Will be Big
Boom for City-WOrk Will
be Finished Early Spring.

The new Union st. road. south Of
the city. which is costing the county
in the ueighborhood OF $4,000, VIII
be finished IN four weeks time after
the work is resumed in the early
spring. Saturday next, work Will be
discontinued for the present season.
II. w. Reed & sons OF Mishawaka
VINO are the contractors for the i'm
provement have been at work on
the job since August 4, and have
had 80 men continuously employed.
Their equipment IS most complete and
comprises a narrow gage railway
with a train of cars which has been
making daily trips between tho work
and the Lake Shore station a dis
tance of about four miles. This nina
ture train hauled all the gravel from
this city necessary for the improve
ment.
Three miles of the road have been
completed, and the contractors say
they Will have no difficulty in finishing
the Job within a month after they
get started in the spring.
Mishawaka business men look on
the new road as one of the best en-
terprises for the city that it has ever
had. For one thing it Will bring the
farmers Of Wyatt. Bremen and Waka-
rusa four and a half miles nearer this
city over a splendid main macadam
road. The trouble in the past has
been that these farmers could not get
TO Mishawaka with their produce, I'M
less by q round about way which
made it almost an impossibility for
them to come here.
The contractors have had TO en-
counter many obstacles in their work,
such as cutting down hills Of rock
and overcoming other such impedi-
ments.
The Business Mems association has
taken considerable interest in the new
road. and a committee consisting of
Messrs o +. Lang, J. deLorenzzi and
T.. A. NOgt are at present arranging
with the contractors to make ii trip
over the road within the next few
days. c. l.. Ostrander, president Of
the association. in conversation with
The News Times Friday, said that the
new road would mean even more for
the city than could possibly be mag
ined Owing TO there having been no
means of communication between
these outlying places and Mishawaka
in the past. trade had been diverted
elsewsere which would otherwise have
come TO the larger city.
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1914-12-04
RUDOLPH MARKER IS
CHAMP" CORN GROWER
Madison Township Boy Wins
First Prize in st. Joseph
County Contest.

Rudolph Marker of Madison town
ship, Is the champion boy corn
grower OF st. Joseph county for 1914.
Marker raised more and better corn
to the acre at d smaller cost than any
other lad OF the county who entered
IN the annual corn growing contest
for 1914. Markers yield avera ged 81
bushels per acre. He raised this at
a cost of Il cents per bushel and at
the end Of the season after paying for
his setd, his labor, the fertilizer, etc,
he had a net profit of $43.77 per acre
Announcement of the prize winners
of the county was made Friday by
County Agent John Bordner, Nho has
been sitting up nights during the past
week since the show of last Friday
and Saturday. figuring out the stand
ings of the boys. Seven boys ali told
Will get a weeks trip to Purdue uni
versity as a reward for raising the
best corn in their townships. The
boys were not only required 10 send
in a sample OF their prize corn, but
accompanied ii with a record of the
crop, including cost of production.
This record was kept in "A small book
which was carefully examined by
Bordner in arriving at his conclusions.
The first prize is a trip to Purdue
in January. The boys will be en-
rolled in a weeks short course in ag-
riculture while there. The second
prize is a spraying outfit, third prize,
pruning outfit; fourth prize magnify
ing lens to use in agricultural study
in school.
The winners follow:
Madison tOwnship-First, Rudolph
Marker, winner for county; second,
Arnold Marker; third, John Wagner;
fourth. Warren Geyer
Penn township--First Fred Beeh-
Ter; second Kent Bachtel.
Liberty ownship-First, Harvey
Shenneman; second, Earl Coon;
third, w. H. Schlarb; fourth John
Clear.
Lincoln township-First, Amel
Fink; second, Willard Rupel.
Harris and Clay townships-First.
Walter Lerner; second George
Schneck; third, Lester Mark: fourth.
Cecil Krupp.
Greene and Center townships
First Vernon Kaser: second, Martin
Rupel; third, Iva Schafer; fourth,
Alex Funston.
Union township-First, Harry Hall:
second, Oren Fisher; third, Wilbur
Nettrour; fourth, Lawrence ROUGH.
South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1914-12-04
CONFERENCE ROOSES
RELIEF FROM QUARANTINE

\ conference OF federal and state author
tiles relatives To the buof and mouth dis
elSe In Indiana was held Thursday at I'M
dianapoliS. County Agent John Bcrdlcr
WAS notified Friday OF recommendations
offered by the conference for action hy the
department Of agriculture M Washington.
One recommended the release from quar-
antine Of - counties for the shipment ~
live sock between states. Stock may be
Skipped from counties that had been i'm
fected providing IN inspection = first made
II the stock at shipping points by author
lied inspectors.
Mr.. BJrduer explained that the confer
ence reached this decision to afford She
stock raiser a better market for his meat
The present market quotations iu the state
are in some instances much below those OF
fered in outside states S3id Mr.. Borduer.
BY being able To- ship ont Of the state
better prices will be afforded the stock
men.
The authorities NJ Washington are ex-
pected 10 act on the recommendation with
In few days.