davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1914-05-09
BUSINESS CHANCES

8USNGSS CdANC~
FOR SALE OR TRADE-For clean
land; first class hotel, doing a fine
business; steam heat and strictly
up to date. n. Pierson, Columbus,
IN. Oak.
WANTED-All around eating house
and restaurant manager and cook;
German family preferred. Success
guaranteed to sober and industrious
parties. Address, II. G. 10y, San.
ton, N. Oak. 7"
TO TRADE-A good piano for a Ford
automobile. John May, Ryder. N. D.
FOR SALE-Furniture Of 35-room
hotel. Address, Box 546, Mandan,
N. Oak.
STOCK RANCH FOR SALE.
FOR sALE-Stock ranch, 1457 acres
in township 147, range Sc. Mclean
county, n. D.; all in one solid
square body; fenced with 3 wires;
mostly rough; about 200 acres in
timber; splendid valleys; running
Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1914-05-09
WANTED-HoUsEs.

WANTED-To rent a 6 to s room
modern house. Phone 307X.
Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1914-05-09
AB3TRAUTM0

The Byrne Abstract Once. Pf0'
nser abstracters Of Burleigh county.
Abstracts guaranteed by bond Of &c.,
~. The only abstract ONCE In the
oounty complying with letter ana
pdrt Of the state law relating to ab'
Stracters of title. We have our own
records and indexes. Our equipment
D modern and up to the minute.
TAe Burleigh County Abstract com
aaAy. Legal Abstracters for Burletgh
county. Under bond Of $4,000. City
National Bank Bldg. W. v. Kiebert.
General Insurance. City National
Rank BldS.
Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1914-05-09
FARM LANDS

Farm Il
WAN1ED: farm or city loans.
WANTED-Listing of first class
wild land and also improved. farms
in Burleigh county. u. T.. Owens,
Bismarck, N. D. p
FOR. RENT-160 acres hay land.
%35-141-80. Inquire Mrs. =. H. Web
er. at Wonder Store.
FOR RENf-160 acres hay land;
35-141-SO. Inquire Mrs. E. H. Web
er, at Wonder Store.
Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1914-05-09

FOR sALE-$20 takes practically un-
used $50 Seeger refrigerator.
Phone Al.
Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1914-05-09
PIANO TUNING

Resident Tuner. Call Peck's Music
House, or A. S. Hoffman, 1902 Ave. c..
Bismarck daily tribune. [volume] (Bismarck, Dakota [N.D.]) 1881-1916, 1914-05-09
ROOMS FOR RENT

FOR RENT-Modern furnished room;
40S Third, St.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11
uuCIoRS Unable TO AGREE
Question Whether Grown Bread Is
Superior to White Still Forms
Subject for Argument.

White bread vas said By experts,
OF by those who claim 10 be experts. to
be much superior TO brown bread a
few months ago, and We were told that
the idea Of eating graham bread or
any bread containing part or all Of the
bran of wheat and other portions of
the grain which are taken out in the
boiling process was old-fashioned and
might lead TO injury Now come the
medical inspectors OF the French army,
a group OF very distinguished physi-
clans and scientists. who say that
boiling pushed beyond a certain limit
eliminates the useful element OF -four
in more than one respect and does
nothing, but improve the color OF the
bread When white bread is used ex-
clusively they have found that the
men eat and need more meat, but
when the -four is only partially bolted
and only the coarser particles of the
bran are removed the soldiers are in
better health and they eat less meat,
which results in superior economy and
efficiency at the same time. The meth
cd of boiling -four was invented some
centuries ago. and it seems about time
that the relative values of white and
unbOlted -four were settled, but the
doctors can no more agree about ii
than they can about the therapeutic
value Of alcohol-New York CONNER,
cial
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11
What He Needed.

After Jack Sullivan, the witness
who charged that Becker was
framed up" by tie gamblers. left the
witness stand, it took him consider
able time to cool off. Sullivan created
an uproar in court by defying every
one and giving his answers as he saw
fit. Some friends met him on the
street outside the court building.
Jack" said one, come over at
the corner and get something cool to
drink
Not me-" he replied, wiping the
perspiration from his face. If l
took a drink now in my condition I'd
crack boiler What l need is a two
or three days snooze in somebody S
icehouse."
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11
RoXaI Kitchens.

The kitchens at Windsor castle are
perfect in all their arrangements. The
chief kitchen is a fine room. with a
lofty ceiling, and is lined with white
tiles. 1t contains marvellous collec-
ton OF copper scaucepans that vary in
size from the dimensions of tub
down to that Of a tiny breakfast cup.
Another feature is the huge steel ia
BILE used for serving. 1t is brilliantly
polished, and has hollow legs through
which the steam passes upwards, heat
ing the whole table. Another apart
ment is called the Green Room"
though in this case it has nothing to
do with the stage, but is set apart for
the cooking of vegetables. Yet an
other is kept for fruit used at dessert,
and there is also room assigned to
the table deckers," whose sole duty
is to attend to the floral decorations
Of the royal dinner table.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11
IN NEED OF IT'S TEACHINGS
Able Seaman Had Not Read Little
Book" but Evidently 1t Might
Have Done Him Good.

The chaplain of one of our cruisers
had knack Of presenting small
Bibles, neatly tied in a parcel, to men
on the upper deck That it contained
Bible he carefully refrained from
mentioning, merely saying, Here is a
little book you'll like" He gave one
to Able Seaman Spikes. One day, a
week later, he approached Spikes as
the latter was smoking on the upper
deck. How do you like the little
book, Spikes?" Spikes mind flew to
his ditty-box, in which the little par
eel, still intact, reposed. He slowly
removed his pipe. Very interesting.
sir-very." Glad to hear that you
have started reading it," said the par
son. Started, sir? Why, I've finished
it Spikes had no idea what the book
was); don't take me long to read
book, sir, especially a good book. But
there, sir, it ended like all the others
got married and lived happy ever
after"
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11
Back 7 ak.

Howard Elliott, president of the
New Haven lines, said at dinner in
New York:
4 don't encourage back talk among
our employes-far from it-but l must
say my sympathies are rather with
one of our conductors who ventured
under great provocation, on little
back talk the other day.
LAS the conductor was punching
tickets, man said to him, with a
nasty sheer:
You have a lot Of wrecks on this
road, don't you?'
oh, no. said the conductor
You're the first I've seen for some
time"
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11
s. SNA,ILE.S
81 81 3 e ID
WARNING TO TALESMEN.

a juror the other day appeared in
court and claimed exemption on the
ground OF deafness. The judge, in a
subdued tone Of voice, Intercepted
the deaf mar
How long have you been deaf?"
1.-TWO years"
The Judge, il a much less audible
tone: How was your deafness
caused z"
Juror caught severe cold.
Judge lin a voice reduced almost to
a whispeT)-Dont you think your deaf
ness Is cured?
Juror-No, my lord
ooh, you viii do very well, SIR" re-
piled his lordship, and everyone In
court laughed except the iuror-Lon-
don Evening Standard
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11
SninerS.

Miss Elsie De Wolf said, en- route
for summer in Versailles and Ven
ice:
New York is the most democratic
city in the world. In New York tai
~ent, real talent, will admit one any
where. There is nothing sniffy about
New York.
No, we're not like the duchess,
whose little daughter, Lady Ann, said:
Mother why do people have
noses?'
Common people. dear Ann the
duchess answered, have noses to
smell with but high-born people like
US have noses wherewith to express
contempt for common people,"
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11
Gave Him the Idea.

The sweet young thing sat in the
stern of the boat, unmindful of the
agonies of the inexperienced oarsman,
who tugged and blistered himself at
the paddles.
What do you suppose wen have
for supper in Campo" she unused
sweetly.
Floating island, l think" painted
the young man grimly. THAT same
island has passed me, going up stream,
three times since I've been trying to
make it to the landing"
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11
No Insult

Some time back, when Sir Herbert
Tree was taking the waters at Marien-
bad he was accosted by a perfect
stranger.
Begging your pardon, sir" said
the latter, but aren't you Beerbohm
Tree, the actor?"
mo, certainly not" replied Sir Her
bert unblushingly
I'm very sorry" said the other,
but I thought you were. You look
SO much like the pictures have seen
Of him.
4 can assure you that you are mis-
taken" persisted Sir Herbert.
We'll, / didn't mean to insult you,
sir observed the stranger, but |
did think you looked like him."
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11
The Standard Rearer

I'm afraid our daughter is not 60
ing to make a very happy marriage -
said Mr.. Cumrox
Why not?" asked his wife. She's
worthy of the best Of men,"
Yes. But she scares the really in
dustrious fellows away. Her idea of
a really able man is one who will sit
on the front step and wave little flag
and boiler. Votes for womenn"
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11
Caution.

Redd-This paper says that an ILL
nots inventors metal ladder fire es-
cape, which can be unreeled from a
window as a person descends, is pro-
Vtded with guides to prevent it sway
ing dangerously from side to side.
Greene-To make It safer 1t might
be provided with suitable handles, SO
1t could be promptly conveyed from
q lodger's room when he is consider
ably behind in his weekly payments
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11
She kNHW

Father-You say you want to marry
this young man?
Daughter father.
y But you've only met him twice,
you say"
Yes, father"
But you can't know anything about
a young man by only meeting him
twice.
"Oh, yes, father. I know he tam
goes beautifully"
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11

| Yah, who invented an Indian alphabet.
He not only invented it, but he taught
it to the other Cherokees by writing
1t out on leaves, and this peculiar
form of literature was in general use
In that tribe long before the white
man knew of it. In 1928 the mission
aries adopted it, and utilized 1t in
magazine which they published for
the red men.
Sequo Yah was banished fro2 Ala
bama with the other members Of his
tribe, and settled in New Mexico,
where he died in 1913.
In 1916, when Endlicter was pre-
pairing his synopsis Of the cone bear
ing trees, he heard of the Indian lit
erary genius, Sequo Yah, and decided
to dedicate to his memory the great
redwood tree OF California. Thus he
called it sequoia.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11
in Hoe sjono VInces.

Lac Stafford of Minneapolis found
himself in Chicago once in rush times.
An Odd Fellows convention made the
streets hum, crowded the hotels and
damned the restaurants. Stafford and
a companion we're casting about for
a likely spot for short snack when
a sign confronted them. 1t presented
the links Of the order, with the let
tiers q. o. o. F." superimDosed.
Lets 90 in here" suggested Stat
ford. 1--WE can get ten of on sau-
sage"
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11
Out of Step With the Present

Il don't quite see how dancing can
be so generally INDUCED in said Mr..
Growcher
Some very dignifed men enjoy it."
That's the point. After a man gets
along to where he has leisure to learn
to tango, he ought to be old enough
to know better"
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11
Not OnnnrfunifN

"'Tis opportunity knocking" re-
marked the lazy man, as the thumps
resounded on the door of his $2-a-week
room, and, being wise, he opened it
the door, of course.
mo, amt opportunity" remarked
a raucous voice. I'm to get an Install
ment on them books you bought last
month. "-Philadelphia Ledger.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11
The Church Prosperous.

DO you have mathis in this
church," asked the high church WIS.,
itor of the verger Of the village
church.
mo, indeed" replied that dignitary,
with scorn. I'VE has oil cloth, and
right up the chancel, too!"-Christian
Register.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11
SnDroDrl5ta.

First Shining Light Tin The colored
church)-Ah don't believe in calm
dis heah society de Ladies' Auxiliary
OATS imitatin' de white folks.
Second Shining Light-Den wot
will we call it?
First Shining Light-Well, wot's de
mattah wild calm it de "Colored Sup
plement?"
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11
Probably Not.

''The caveman used to bang his
bride over the head with club and
walk of with her.
What of it?"
Il don't suppose the girls cared TO
rehearse the ceremony as they do now
adays."-Louisville Courier-Journal
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11
a Younn Gala Mt.

Teacher-Now, Jimmy, let me hear
you compare sweet.
Jimmy-Positive, sweet molases;
comparative, mOlases; superlatiye.
lasses.
Teacher-Stop, stop. Jimmy.
Jimmy-Yes, nam: / dasn't go any
further. the girls might mob me.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11
Nail Sets.

Bacon see in new hammer
handle is a secret recess for carrying
a nail set.
Egbert-I'H get one for my wife.
then she1la always have her ham,
mer and her manicure set conveniently
near.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11
In the Honexmoon

Its your wife, said the Office boy
Take the message said the busy
man impatiently.
You'd better come, sir, I think
stammered the embarrassed boy She
wants to give you a kiss over the
phone. Louisville Courier-Journal.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11
A Conservative Protest

I want to call your attention to the
Fashion Hints" said the man who was
soliciting subscriptions.
mo use" replied the plain, en-
phatic woman. Fashions have gotten
to where hints won't do any good. You
might as well start by calm for the
police"
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11
The Climatic Muse

''Why is spring poetry so frequent
ly bad?"
people who write it can't get the
proper atmosphere. A spring poem
to be ready for an April magazine has
to be completed in January
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11
Concerning Clothes.

These new fashions" said the Sc
we're woman, are positively bur-
lesques.
They DO seem rather in the ma
ture of travesties on good FORM re-
piled Miss Cayenne. But wouldn't
you rather describe some of them as
mere take-offs?"
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11
Namino the Redwood Tree.

The giant redwood tree, which now
grows only in California, is called the
sequoia-and this is the reason why:
In the very long ago there once
lived a Cherokee Indian named Sequo
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11
ParadnXicaI Escane.

THE fugitive from the police did a
paradoxical thing when he hid himself
in the old well"
How was that paradoxical?"
why, he jumped into hole to get
out of one
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11
His Trade,

81 see where the leading lady of that
company is suing a professional ma
gician for lifting her.
81 suppose he considered it merely
a slight of hand performance"
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11
But Sister Didn't Hear II

He comes up to our house nearly
every night"
What is it that is SC attractive up
there?"
Nothing attractive, he just comes
to see my sister,
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11

My theory is that men are what
they eat, so we should be careful to
select. appropriate diet
Tn so glad to hear that, Mr.. Softly.
We have calf's brains for dinner"
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11
She Was the Cause,

There goes Bertha, the innkeep
er's pretty daughter; she's broken
many hearts, mine among them"
Eyes, my red nose lies on her con,
science, too."-F1iegende Blaetter.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11
Master Was Away.

what are you smacking your lips
about, Norah?" asked the lady of the
house, suspiciously.
Because there's nobody about to
smack 'em for me, na'am," was the
reply.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11
Fashions Slaves.

Madge-It's pity we couldn't see
ourselves as others see us.
Marjorie-If we did, my dear, the
slit skirt wouldn't be SO fashionable
Puck
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11

The color of that couples lives
does not form an artistic contrast"
why not?'
She has a rosy future and he has a
purple past"
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11
lis Ordeal.

She--I understand you are lover
of music.
He-Don't stop on my account
Judge.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11

All that glitters isn't gold. Many
man has pinned his faith to a star,
only to discover that it was really
only freely.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11

Progress has produced new styles
in both men and pianos. It has just
about gotten so that if a man is square
he is regarded-as old-fashioned
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11

Some men imagine dignity means
maintaining a constant crouch, and
others think it means wearing impos-
sible Whiskers.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11

This would be grand old world If
people could purchase experience on
trial, with the privilege Of returning
it If not satisfactory.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11
No Cutfino There

Did they cut out anything when
you went to the hospital?"
Yes, I think they cut out about
everything they could get hold OF ex-
cept the BILL
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11

The reputation of many man is so
bad that it might be good thing for
him to lose it entirely.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11

The man who depends upon his pull
to get him into heaven had better be-
gin to practise shOveling coal.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11
Ito Kind.

IF my dog could get job, l wonder
what kind he would select"
He is like yourself; he would want
something of a snap"
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11
Not Previously Touched"

Borrowby-Let's see, do owe you
anything?
Bangs-Not a cent, my boy. Are
you going around paying your little
debts?
Borrowby- going around see
ing if overlooked anybody. Lend me
five till Saturday, Will you?
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11
Certainly Not

Are you an optimism
Far from tim a humorist."-
Judge.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11
Ifs WaInht

links tells me he is building up
business to make stout women thin
again"
Then he must be making a fat
thing of it."
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11
A Short Cut

When that small slipper made Of glass
Was worn by Cinderella,
! The dear girl did not cut her foot;
She merely cut a swell
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11

You will discover that most men are
all right, if you only take the trouble
to ask them.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11

Life is full of ups and downs, and
even the man who is on the level
doesn't always find it smooth travel
ing.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11
Wasted Effort.

What ais mother?"
''She has just heard that despite
her efforts one-haif the world doesn't
know the other half lives
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11

It sometimes takes more than
liquid glances to make a fellow solid
with a girl.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11

The man who poses as a social lion
among women may stack up like a yel-
low cur among real men.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11

Even the billboard man will tell you
there is quite a difference between be-
ing we'll posted and being stuck up.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11

Even when they move in the best
circles some people are always trying
TO square themselves.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11
Real Mean.

came to town at half-past six,
Twas this so early brought me
I wished those tarnel tags to miss,
But a sharp tag girl caught me.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11

If you are going to kick at all it is
perhaps just as well to do it with both
feet.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11

The man who makes a religion of
luck follows a mighty uncertain creed.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11

One boy IN school beats a dozen in
q poolroom.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11

A woman seldom nags her husband
unless he is that kind of husband.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11
Paradoxica!,

Here is a funny thing that s true,
Now is the time to learn it;
If you would keep a Woman's love,
My~sen, you must return it.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11

If a las a habit of getting hot
~ haNcollar he should quit wear
Jilars.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11
nofthie D0se

He-Were you bored?
She-Oh, doubly so, and by boor
at that.-Exchange
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-06-11

A mans idea Of a quiet little game"
is one in which money does all the
talking.