The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1914-01-23
on GRAPE JUICE.
CONTINUED nom Pare one.y


CONTINUED from Pare one.y
ton, where every man there could
have returned to his home ana nave
siven hi. wife : toi s ,r co1ns srom
start to finish. once heard OF 9
etalwart bourbon who came home late
at night from such q poW-WoW. enteI-
ing the front door in his SOCK 1eet.
tiptoeing his way to bed. and e ne
glimpse Of hiS wife. by the flare Q!
the tallow Dip went to his dazed ano
oelirious slumber under the hallucina-
ton that she was twins. fti
That Grape juice Dinner.
It. may hav. been another mistake OF
this distinguished man In introonc'ne
this brevet beverage at his table ~ =
Washington, for mistakes he has maue
lis full of them as eggs are OF mea :
n what distinguished ex-president mas
said of him, a..d Roosevelt was an e1-
pert on such things. Down IN tne
hearts Of the foreign representatives =.
his board at that meal. arrahseu
around the repast, like bric-a-nra On
the mantel. except they were vitAI.u ~
why, they would have preferred Tue
water in the finger bowl to this preol-
rested, dehorned, indicated ana 1or-
maldehyded lotion. He may have con
1ectured that with the coming OF ma.
tional prohibition now focused IN tns
stage lmelight, and which 10 as poun y.
TO come as acorns in the fan, tnat ~
was up to him to introduce new anu
national drink like the flag that Betty
Ross invented or the game with whicn
echenck enlivened the drowned heaos
q Europe. -..-.-
10 to 1 Against 1t.
In any event. it is Is to l that II
will never be adopted here. II the
Peoria distilleries were Closed We
would still have buttermilk tapiets anu
other stomach washes to depend upon
without this pretended preteAt .!
drink. that neither exhilarates nor tne-
briates. Its use will not kindle any
kind of an enthusiasm even with
forced draft. I have some acquaint-
ance with that party: was ioFceo ~
spend a term of penal servitude with IT,
Feed a genuine Democrat on ms nan..-
uated drink, he will brain his wlre win
the framed motto of "God bless our
home he sent to the tombs. and
paroled from It In time to bear the
banner of retrenchment and reform
that heads the procession at nignt.
crane iuice is an expressionless drink
and is nothing more than liquid In
gratitude for 1t never gives back any
expression Of thankfulness for the
prominency Of its use. It 10 vRcous
IN us HOW anu A0OA6 8sAAAAS4y $50 49, -
down.
An Emergency Fluid.
It is an emergency fluid. 1t has no
bououet: and no Democrat was ever
satisfied with q drink that did not
emit or give back its aroma, ana
stake all the knowledge I have of that
party in saying that you cannot hedge
any communion or amen corner DEM
ocrat with an invisible dash Of hello
no frNvA
1t has been deprived by some labora-
tory reagency or flux of the power Of
fermentation, the only virtue 1t ever
might have had. 1t is not even a
buggy mate with an old woman's tea
1t can no more be aroused to alertness
or activity than can the embalmed
body filled with red paint, through
the professional skill Of q funeral di-
rector at the morgue. No poor man
quality excepting volume like the ex-
celsior in q mattress. He might have
known 1t was wholly unsatisfactory
and unsuited to the gastric juice Of
any Democrat to change to the
strange label and strange contents of
grape juice. Any express agent in
Kansas could have told him better
than that; and the tender Of the Leav-
enworth bridge. the only big port Of
entry and through or over which
comes the only industry of that me-
tropolis, had voluminous statistics to
show that this was another mistake Of
our Moses. He should have known
that he could no more debase the Ii
Quor of country than he could it's
currency. Had he dared offer this
kind Of pabulum to the members Of
the Russian Duma, those implacable
foes to everything but liberty, they
would have refused to have sat with
him for their pictures. I have often
thought that that picture would have
had more of the eternal harmonies
grouped in it if it had been the man
with the big club in its center Grape
juice is unrelated to vodka, it has
none of the dietary of Kirmis and
there is no appealing taste in its cup
that make the assassination OF a czat
Imperative. The democracy need no
guidance to a drink any more than did
the flying and fugitive slave need a
guide board to the north star.
Old Age Will Not Ripen 1t.
1t is not like American whisky.
which the government has made a
crime to make even in the Silly night,
out Of ones own corn raised on his
rented patch on the hillside in the
woods, and which has caused manv a
hill-billy Democrat trouble before
now. Old age will not ripen grape
Juice nor will q long and tempestuous
sea voyage improve it; the absence of
fusel oil in it is a hereditary trait.
1t may. with its jocund and ruby
color, have a seductive and wistful
promise to the eye of a Democrat but