The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1914-05-16


upon the tousled locks OF old Tom Lewis
or JUNE McCree or Frank McIatyre or
some of those other stout boys by mistake.
Actress Guides for Rent.
Even before any gent and lady friend
gets more than "A foot beyoad the entrance
to the clubhouse at the opening OF the fair
Tonight the heart of the gent at least will
begin to leap. For just to the left of the
door as one enters said gent viii see a
placard over a door which informs an ex-
cited cosmos that for the stingy sum OF
fifteen cents one may hire a beautiful
actress lady TO guide him all through the
fair Cher arm through his'n) for fifteen
minutes.
The girls nightly from tonight on will
he sitting and waiting for the comeons
in that room. Yesterday. when nothing
had started at all, one might have seen
the beautcous Miss Marion Sunshine OF
Hitchys show sitting in front OF a solo
square Of loneliness In that room merely
rehearsing the work OF sitting there. In
fact, the first regular money that went
into the fund being raised by means OF the
fair--a fund to be spent beneficially for
laidup actors-was paid out by reporters
who clawed each other and struggled and
bit and kicked and tore each Others
first to pay over fifteen cents to Marion.
Stell and the rest OF US girls SO that
Marion and Stell and the others would
show the reporters around.
As exclusively announced In this paper,
THE Sun reporter was the first to climb
over the dead and injured and therefore
naturally placed his fifteen cents--a dime
and hve pennies--in the fair hand of the
Spannard, which anybody who has been
IN tIifchv'a shny will knpxt
Miss Marion. So arm in arm we-no-
body is supposed to say we outside of the
editorial page, but sometimes there's no
way OF avoiding it--so arm In arm we
went through the show while carpenters
carpentered and painters painted and
steam filters fitted and electricians cleo
tricianed against the opening tonight.
Tickets for the Tom show.
A. you go in the door you see painted
representation OF the Town Hall. You
stop there--your fifteen cent guide sees
that you stop thereto buy q ticket for
"Uncle Toms Cabin" at the Opry House
tonight The man at the Town Hall door
directs you to KILN s. Pillim's Drug
Store, where the tickets and diagram are
for sale and on view.
Marion. still leaning cozily on your
ARMAND all for fifteen cents. remember
leads you inside TO the drug store where
the tickets are being sold. Also they will
sell you rabbits foot dabbers and cold
cream and grease paint and anything else
the hired lady escort wants. Marion
you begin to call her by her first name
before eight cents worth of escorting has
been used up-can think OF more things
that you positively need at that drug
store! The Spannard will not need to buy.
after professionally escorting for one or
two evenings, a single toilet article
throughout her future stage career.
And there are, or will be when the fair
opens tonight, a flock OF maidens out
side an Oriental dance pavilion, stand
ing there and just looking pretty in their
Turkish trophy clothes while Junie Nc
Cree and his flock OF educated ballyhooers
ballyhoo you inside their particular show
And when you get inside that tent you'll
md that the lovely ladies doing the ques-
Iionablo dances are a lot of wide lads that
include Tom Lewis, George Monroe, Ed
die Begley and 80 on and on and on.
McCree II Legree.
Across the way will be a wild animal
ehow, and when your fifteen cents worth
of actress guide steers you into that you
walk by the animals and See. at stated
intervals, a reproduction on "A little stage
of the crossing the ice scene from Uncle
Toms Cabin" No. they don't burlesque
the classic But Junie plays Simon Le-
gree and Stell Mayhem plays Little EUd
Outside of that they will act It proper
and treat IL serious.
And there viii be diving Venuses dowr
in the big swimming tank OF the club
house, with arguments on the side by eve
hing clothed ladies and gentlemen who
every twenty minutes will have TO wine
up their imaginary scraps by brawling e
the extent OF falling headlong into tho
tank And don't be fooled by such fool
ishness; they're not really classy hus
bands and wives scrapping. They have
10 fight and fall into the tank for eact
new crowd at the Diving Venuses show
There are. or will be tonight. forum,
tellers and grape juice booths and palm
lists and lady policemen built on the lineI
OF Miss Florence Morrison. who posed FOL
the Woolworth Building, circulating
through the crowd. The sole aim In If,
of Patrolwoman Florence Morrison ant
her sister cops from 80 o'clock to-nigh
9on will be to squirm through the Jam Tool;
ing for tghtNads.
You won't be bothered with girls ask
ing you to take chances on articles, bu
you viii be expected to buy IA ter cen
ticket here ana there To see one Of tn,
sideshows, II you don't you win hav,
the ecstatic pleasure Of being pinched n
front OF big crowd BY the eXqulsit,
Patrolwoman Morrison herself and halet
before justice OF the peace and sen
renced. Ten to one your sentence will b,
2 fine.
But to recapltulate. greatest OF all IN,
attractions will be the chance TO spenC
delightful moments each day and evenin,
throughout the run OF the fair with an,
ecrumptious actress YOU wish TO selec
from crates OF Broadway peaches, and al
Sor fifteen cents, Also all the time a ban,
will he crashing and brand new vaudeville
stunts never before seen Will be going OF