The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1914-04-03
HER LITTLE plot.
BY Donald Allen.

| eral.
The deacon shed no tears. His
chin didn't culver. He didn't look as
If it was the end of all things with
him, but it, was old Mrs. Goodhue
who abashed them by saying:
II dunno about that. A sasser or
tea will slop over heap qulcker'n a
washtub tut of water"
4 he Deacon's daughter and her
husband had come on to the funeral.
between their getting home from the
services and the evening meal very
little was said, but at the table the
daughter observed:
We'll, pa, you are going to feel
awful lonesome"
Il shall, Hammer"
Been married long time"
over thirty years."
"And she was a good wife?
THE best in the world"
but you'll have to marry again"
put in the son-in-law.
"No,sir--neverp
but you'll want a homer
es,, and Ill hWe a house-keeper.
Cephas, you and Hammer just listen
while / say that | hope | may never
go to Heaven if take another wi.ep
The Deacon meant that from the
bottom of his soull His voice broke,
ais eyes hlled and he used a corner OF
the table-cloth to wipe away his tears.
1t was mean of Cephas to wink at
his wife, but all sons-in-law are oft
the same piece oil goods.
In that same village of Dawson
dwelt the Widow Hastings. She was
past ~, well thought OF, and the
world has got through saying she
would marry again if she got the
chance. She had known the Deacon
and his wife tor many years. She
was sorry for his loss.
Mrs. hastings had lost good hus-
band, as husbands go, but after his
death she hadn't said that if she ever
took another she hoped never to go
to Heaven. A wise woman does not
tie herself up in that uncalled-fo for
manner. The most she will say is
1t is sad loss for her.
The Deacon decided not to board.
He engaged an old woman as house
keeper, and though her cooking was
bad he had to put up with it. The
old woman was hanging to her job
with her toenails, as it were, for she
knew that she was no cook, when she
made a. solemn promise one day to
have some light biscuits for supper.
On that day the Widow Hastings
dropped in and was told of the pro-
mise. The biscuits turned out to be
heavy as lead, and when the Deacon
sat down to the table he picked up
one and shouted:
by the great horn spoon, but if
NhnaA -. - =
would kill him deadp
just then, as if she had timed her
self by a stop-watch, in tripped the
widow with SIX hot biscuits on a plate
and covered up with snowy napkin,
and to the Deacon's look of gratitude
she said:
Il was afraid grandma's biscuits
might not be light, so brought over
some of my own"
When she had been thanked bv the
grateful man and had departed he said
to himself:
IF anything could reconcile me to
a second marriage, it would be hot
biscuits like these"
And then he took the last of the
six and sighed and added:
But / said hoped I'd never go
to Heaven"
The old woman had to go and
another came. One day when the
widow ran over she was told that the
Deacon drank a whole quart of milk
every night with his supper. That
evening, when the good man poured
out his milk and took swig of it, he
shouted at the cook:
by thunder, are you trying to poi
son me2"
What's the mattera"
This milk has been sowed with
alumni
And in tripped the Widow Hast
ings, with pitcher in her hand, to
say;
Il think | heard thunder this after
noon and maybe it soured the milk.
Here is some fresh from the cow"
She didn't wait for thanks, and the
Deacon gulped down a glass of the
rich fluid and growled.
Dog my cats, why did / say that
to Cephas and Hanner".
That houSekeeper had to go and
another one came. For time the
Deacon thought he had a prize and
then there came a fall down. The
woman was boiling potatoes for
when the CHEEKY little widow came
in to bring her a paper pattern,
There came an opportunity to pour
most OF the water out of the kettle
and bring about an odor of burning
OF potatoes. Did the widow grasp
it
There wasn't time to cook a fresh
supply and the Deacon was shifting
and jawing when the widow came in
to say;
Il thought Mrs. Brice might for
get her potatoes in her interest in the
pattern, and so brought you some
French fried ones"
Never in his life had the Deacon
met up with French fried potatoes.
and never had he thought the tubers
dish.
By gosh what a cookl wonder if
Cephats and Hammer have remember
ed what l saidl".
By the time the customary year of