Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1914-11-29

Ilere early III the AFTERNOON, ana was SO
much impressed by the clean-cut appear
upon the streets long after l should have
sought my couch to rest up for the eve
ming. The streets were as clean as whistle.
The dwellings were attractive in design
and setting, and the business blocks were
of digniied if not massive style of
architecture. Best of ALL if 1 could judge
from those saw to-ing and fro-ing upon the
streets, the people themselves were alert and
active.
In view of all this apparent prosperity l
was trife surprised when the chairman ar
rived at the hotel to find him rather de-
pressed. He was a clergyman, and at first
glance seemed to be suffering from pro-
found melancholy; so very profound indeed
that | deemed it my duty to try to cheer
him UP.
"What fine, prosperous little city you
have here, Doctor" said l with genuine
enthusiasm. give put in the greater part
of the afternoon looking the place over, and
l tell you it has filled me with joy"
"Humph!" said he gloomily. at looks
prosperous, butt anti It's bank-made
town. The banks got here first, and induced
people to come and settle on easy terms,
and the terms haven't turned out quite
so easy as they might. There's hardly a
man in this town that isn't up to his chin
in debt
ooh, well, what of that?" said I, still re-
solved to win out on a tolerably hopeless
proposition. @Of course debt is bad thing;
but sometimes it acts as spur. Your people
are bright and brainy looking lot. 1t won't
take them long to settle up"
"Oh, they look bright and brainy,' he re-
turned sadly; "but they anil There isn't
one man in tenll understand half of what
Won cav To them tOpipht
Look here, Doctor!' said I, beginning to
wax trifle chilly myself, especially in the
regions of my pedal extremities. What are
you trying to do, discourage me?"
ooh, no." he replied, with mournful
shake of his head of I'd been trying to
discourage you, I'd have told you about our
lecture hall. It's without any exception the
meanest thing of its kind on the American
continent. Why he added, holding out his
hands in gesture Of utter despair, "why, if
we had lecture hall that was only halfway
decent, ace could afford to hare somebody out
here to talk to us that avonld be avorth listen
ing to!"
THE chairman who in the exuberance of
his own eloquence forgets the name of
the individual he is introducing, even though
he has announced that that name is a
household word, is no creature of the i'm
ag1nat1On, and II the stores that are told OF
him seem hackneyed, it is not because they
are SO frequently told, but because they hap
pen so frequently in the experience of all
platform speakers, and in almost identical
manner. Even so well known a man as Mr..
Bryan has suffered from this, one enthusiast
tic admirer in New York having once, after
a skyscraping peroration, led up with eli
macteric force to the name of 3our Peerless
Leader, William j. Brennings."
In my own platform experience l have
had chairmen come to me at the last mo-
ment and confess with most childlike frank
ness that they have never heard of me before,
asking me to help them out because they
really didn't know what in Tophet to say"
One individual out on the Pacific Coast ap-
preached me one night about ten minutes
before the lecture was scheduled to begin,
and revealed to me his terrible embarrass-
ment over this latter situation.
u didn't know until half an hour ago that
was to present you to Our people tonight,
said he, land to tell the honest truth, Mr..
Bangs, I never heard of you BEFORE"
well" said I, "if had known 1 was to
have the privilege of preparing the obituary
notice you are to deliver over my PROSTATE
remains while l lie in state upon the plat
form tonight, should have written out
+1,o4