davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1914-07-25
THE JOKE TOWNS OF AMERICA

Most of the large cities of these
have their particular adjacent small
towns, which serve as great local
jokes, says George Jean Nathan in an
article on THE Joke Towns of Amer
lea" in the May issue of The Smart
Set. New York with great superiority
regards Brooklyn, Yonkers and Jersey
Gift as existing solely for the purpose
of giving New York one big laugh;
Philadelphia looks similarly on Cam
den; Washington tolerates Alexandria
for the same reason.
New York may well and righteously
giggle at little Jersey City. In Jersey
City, the population actually lives in
houses-im magine!-instead of in flats
bounded on the north window by the
Elevated, on the east window by a
brunette court, on the west by no win
dow at all and on the south by an en-
tracing view of the back wall of an
other fiat disguised under the alias of
Hetherblossom Hall-or something
elegant like that. In Jersey City, you
can't get a highball after midnight.
Think of that! In Jersey City, I re-
peat, you can't get a highball after
midnight. Imagine having to go six
whole hours-from midnight until 6
in the morning-without a highball!
In Jersey City, it is so quiet you can
hear the crickets. Isn't that funny?
A jay town! Think of going to sleep
at night to the chip-chip- -chip-chip of
crickets instead of to the pacific sound
of the elevator out in the hallway or
the piano across the court. In Jersey
CITY, there isn't q restaurant that is
called a lobster palace; there isn't a
cabaret show from one end of the
town to the other; there aren't any
hat check boys: the headwaiters are
crude and vulgar enough to give you a
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1914-07-25

different ideas on Roosevelts plans
for the campaign.
Morris and Palmer conferred yes
terday. OF course, patronage was not
mentioned.
Palmer is LAving a hard time to
pointments.
Lewis and Pinchot spoke in Berks
yesterday Lewis goes TO Maine next
week.
Palmer and other Democrats are
in Huntingdon trying to harmonic
differences. The congressman speaks
at Mapleton to-day.
No notice has been given the
Ryanites of the hearing in the Phila-
delphia contests. They will likely be
forgotten in the other troubles of the
machine bosses.
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1914-07-25
WELL KNOWN PEOPLE

job Hedges, candidate for COVER
nor of New York, is well known among
Princeton men in this State.
DR.. j. William White says that
he does not think that Colonel Roose-
yelt will undertake very strenuous
campaigning in this State.
Mayor Blankenburg is rapidly re-
gaining his health and says he feels
better than he has for years.
Allen r. Sinner, we'll known
Bethlehem man, has been elected
president of the Sinner family asso-
citation.
David T. Sharpless, West Chester,
presented big fiagpole to the hospital
at that place.
Colonel Fred Taylor Pusey, of the
general staff of the National Guard
used to be a legislator
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1914-07-25

status in the world of high finance.
No question as to Warburgs ability
has been raised, but those who are
his appointment quite natur-
ally want to know what advantages to
a great clearinghouse might accrue
from the elevation of one of it's chiefs
to place on the supreme fiscal tri-
bunal of the nation.
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1914-07-25
TOO HOT TO EAT
BY Wing Dinger

VIII is 1t that this time of year
With such good things to eat,
We're stopped from eating all we want
BY the excessive heat
Take chicken corn pie, say, than which
A better dish there's not
But, gee, you can't eat all you want,
Because 1t is too hot.
Fresh vegetables of all kinds
Are thrown into the pot,
But when they're served though we
would like
To eat them. it's too hot.
For months I've hungered for fresh
things
Green corn and beans and such
They're here now, but 1t is so hot
| can't eat very much
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1914-07-25
POLITICAL. SIDELICHTS

DIETRICH must have been taking
lessons from the Democrats in using
the ak.
Mr.. Bryan may be only making
addresses but he is managing to meet
a lot of Democrats and people just the
same.
State Chairman Morris statement
about fusion appear to have aroused
Washington party people.
DR.. Whites statement that Roose-
velt will make few speeches caused
a chill here.
White and Pinchot appear to have.
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1914-07-25

table If you wish one; nobody gives q
darn whether Mrs. Vanderbilt wore
crepe de chine or charmeuse or moth
ing at all last night; nobody gives a
hang whether. Ludwig Worleslopper
wears a white wastcoat with his din
ner jacket or whether he has a dinner
jacket or-having one-whether he
calls it a Tuxedo" Ha, ha, ha! Mirth
and merrimentl
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1914-07-25
EVENING CHAT

It's a subject of remark about the
capitol how people who have the
hablt continue to visit the fiagroom of
the State Museum. For years and years
veterans of the Civil War and their
families have been coming to Harris
burs, and the first place they went to
was the big room on the second floor
Where the flags remained from 1896
TO tiVe weeks ago. Now that the flags
nave been transferred to a better place
Tor proper display there are still many
tolks who go to the flagroom. Some of
them have read all about the cere-
monies attending the transfer of the
nags last month, but they drop in at
the former place and talk about the
standards. Many of them visit the
other interesting departments of the
Museum, and the big white building
bids fair to be one of the most popu-
lar places on the whole of Capitol
Hill. BY and by, the State will put
up museum in keeping with it's i'm
portance and the treasures in the old
Executive Building will be housed as
they should be.
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1914-07-25
1,aOO lNntmegers,, Re-enIIst

Fortress Monroe. July "a. The
United States steamer, Umbria, Captain
A. Blanchard, arrived here yesterday
afternoon from New Orleans, having
on board between 400 and 500 men of
the Thirteenth Connecticut Volunteers,
who re-enlisted for another term.
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1914-07-25
Desirable G
PAM

Mr.. Justwed -
Congratulate me,
dear! | have a
case at last. A
rascal who forged
a lot of notes has
retained me.
Mrs. Justwed -
oh, Jack, how
splendid Y o u
must invite him
to dinner,
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1914-07-25

A Connecticut wife sues her husband
for divorce because he beat her with a
roast-turkey. Any man who so far for
gets himself as to misuse roast turkey
like that ought to be divorced
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1914-07-25
OUR DAILY LAUGH
Bravery

l would never
marry a man who
is a coward.
About h o w
brave would he
have to be to meet
your approval?
Well, he'd have
to have courage
enough to - er -
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1914-07-25
GREASY GETS IN
HOT WATER AGAIN
Does Not Explain How He Failed
to Get National Administra-
tion For Oleo Bill
GENERAL in STATEMENTS
Blakslee's County Would Seem to
Need a Little of the Federal
Officials Time
GENERAL In STATEMENTS

Farmer William T. Greasy, Demo-
cratic candidate for lieutenant-gov-
ernor who put a lot of subordinate
committees of the Palmer Mccormick
League into hot water week ago
when he denounced committees that
had not filed expense accounts in ig
norance of the fact that the leagues
committees were the worst offenders,
has gone and done it again.
This time the Farmer was so busy
twisting politics into his Grange legis-
hlative platform announcements that
he stated that the national government
had given the Changers everything
they had asked for and that the State
government had done practically moth
ing, as he saw it. Now it happens that
the Democratic leaders in Congress
have prevented the enactment into law
of the oleo bill recommended by the
National Dairy Union. The Repub-
lican legislature of Pennsylvania gave
the Changers all the oleo laws that
they demanded and Governor Tener
last year signed the color law which
prohibits the coloring of oleo and sets
standards and colors. The Democratic
bosses in Congress have steadfastly
refused to enact the bill the farmers
want into law.
And Greasy is a member of a COM
mittee named to get the bill through
Congress, which is dominated by men
of the same party which has nomi-
mated him for ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
Last week Greasy hit the Palmer
Mccormick machine an awful whack.
This time he has hit himself on the
back of the head with the fail he
raised to smite his opponents.
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1914-07-25

500 For One Years Service
The Second Ward, of this city, offers
a bounty of 5000 to volunteers for one
years service.
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1914-07-25
AN EVENING THOUGHT

Harsh counsels have no effect:
they are like banners which are
always repulsed by the anvil,
-Helvetius.
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1914-07-25
IN HARRI ISBURC Fifty
YEARS AGO TODAY

lFrom the Telegraph of July 25, 1851
Got 200 Tons of Hay
Proposal for furnishing 200 tons of
hay viii be received by Captain f. c.
Reichenbach, until Saturday next, at IL
o'clock.
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1914-07-25

In these days of thirty y-two-cent beef
steak a gravey spot on the necktie be-
comes badge of wealth.
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1914-07-25
NEWGS} s. TAI TRA4iIRssTTSHESSAR ESSAR
[From the Telegraph of July 25. 1851
EridnN,s BnttIe Loss 1000

Washinton, July %. - A dispatch
to-day from General Sherman states
that his loss in the battle of Friday
last was less than 2,000 while that of
the enemy cannot be less than 1000,
owing to the advantage sherman took
of their effort to turn his left column.
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1914-07-25
propose.

Biz
The b. b. Cap
tain Yeth, Ith
almos' got my
ball team made
up, all l needth
ith eight more
fellowth an a
ball!
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1914-07-25

The temperature was so different
from what most people believed it was
yesterday that during the afternoon a
couple of observations were made at
the government building in order to
make sure. During the hottest part
or the day, when the average man was
thinking that the mercury was around
100 because of the intense humidity,
the observer found that it was but S2
When he was told to come down to
dots he insisted that 80 was right, and
to satisfy some newspapermen he
made a second observation. He found
it just where he said and that ended it.
But the man who bet that it was 50
found plenty of takers.
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1914-07-25

Notwithstanding Clifford Pinchot's s
declaration that Colonel Roosevelt
would speak in the State campaign in
behalf of the Wash
ington party t / C k t
Bull Moosers this fall. neither DIR.
Wondering at j. II. Kreider, Pro-
the Outlook gressiVe candidate for
Congress and clerk in
the department of the
Auditor General, or Ira J. Mosey, the
Bull Moose county chairman, was able
to get any assurance that the Colonel
would speak in the Eighteenth district
or in Harrisburg, and thus far the
managers of the party in this district
have been unable to connect with
anyone to guarantee the expenses of
the campaign. The Washington party
men have maintained a headquarters
by their own contributions and have
been looking for outside help to con-
duct their campaign. The candidates
for the Legislature have thus far been
financing their own campaigns.
Although apparent harmony pre-
vailed at the Democratic county COM
mittee meeting in Mauch Chunk, which
resulted in the reelection
of Albert B. Enbody, of
Blakslee's Mauch Chunk, Car b n
County is countys chairman, it was
All Upset only the cheapest kind of
h a r m ony and existed
merely on the surface
That there still exists a deep-seated
hatred among the different elements
in the Democratic party in Carbon
county is not disputed by even the
leaders themselves, and that no trouble
was manifested at the party organ
ization was little short of a miracle.
Republican leaders, who claim they
are in a position to know, say that the
Republican candidates will receive
several hundred votes from Demo-
cratic sources. They say these Demo-
Gratis will never bow to Palmer's yoke
and that they will show their resent
ment at the November polls. The
hatred between the warning Demo-
cratic factions is too deep to smooth
over until election, and probably ever.
1t is openly declared by Republican
leaders that Lansford at least will give
a big Republican majority this fall.
They say that almost everybody there
is dissatisfied and that they are not
afraid to show their dissatisfaction.
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1914-07-25

Harry w. Pyles, w. w. Champion
and DR.. j. w. Vanhorn, original Wash
ington party men in wyoming county
and all members of the
county committee, were
DIETRICH read out of the party at
Gets Out Williamsport yester d y
His Ak by State Chairman A.
Nevin DIETRICH, who made
speaking dates for Gift
ford Pinchot and William Draper
Lewis, and conferred with M. T.
Stokes of Coudersport, Washington
party candidate for Congress in the
Fifteenth district.
Pyles, Champion and Vanhorn are
known to be warm friends of Con-
gresham Edgar r. Kiess, who is a
candidate for reelection on the Re-
publican ticket. Before the primaries
they came out in support of Kiess for
the Washington party nomination, but
their plans were defeated by Stokes
and his friends. Chairman DIETRICH de-
clared that no recognition would be
given the three men either as county
committeeman or members of the
Washington party
Besides being a member of the
county committee, Mr.. Pyles is a men,
Der of the State committee.
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1914-07-25

Roland S. Morris first chief of the
Democratic State committee, has ar
ranged for a number of Democratic
chieftains in central and
western counties of the
State to meet him at the Morris to
State windmill next Thurs Receive
day for the purpose of dis Thursdays
cussing campaign maneu-
VerS. The conference will
be to straighten out insurrectos in the
organization and to discuss fusion on
Legislative tickets, it being now rec
ognized that there is no hope of effect
ing fusion on congressional nomina-
tions. Morris insists that the reports
of Instructions in the Democratic party
are imaginary and that things are
going ahead very we'll, but there is
manifested about the headquarters an
irritability that was not present in
1912. In all probability Morris will
name the chairman of the shekel COM
mittee for the campaign within short
time and the word will be passed
along that the rank and file will be
expected to contribute, not to let the
burden rest on a few men.
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1914-07-25

Professor d. C. Babcock, forest
pathologist connected with the Ma
uonal Department of Agriculture, who
Is stationed at Wooster, Ohio, in a
letter addressed to Oliver d. Schock,
formerly assistant superintendent of
the Pennsylvania Chestnut Tree Blight
Commission, reports that the chestnut
bark disease has invaded Ohio. Sew
eral centers of infection have been
found, the latest point being near
Ashtabula. Professor Babcock de-
sired information regarding the con-
dition of the chestnut in Western
PENNSYLVANIA. Previous to the sus-
pension of work by the commission
there was but little infection west of
the Allegheny mountains. Since then
the blight has secured a foothold in
n number of localities, and unless the
owners of the trees resort to prompt
remedial measures, such as cutting out
and burning the infected material, it's
further and rapid dissemination is in
evitable. Eastern Pennsylvania tim
Der owners suffered very heavy losses.
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1914-07-25

officials of the State Forestry Com
mission have a good scheme to give
warnings about protecting the forests.
They stamp all parcels with labels
which bear the legend: please help
protect Pennsylvania forests" Ad
vice is given to be careful about fires
in the woods. to be sure that the camp
fire is dead and to extinguish the
matches and tobacco before throwing
them away. The label also contains
this statement:
Wise use of forests will insure pos
terity against famine. Do you care?"
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1914-07-25
McADOO's JOYRDING

PPARENTLY there is more of
~ truth than William G. McAdoo
= Secretary of the Treasury,
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1914-07-25
PIIRLISHED BY

Published every evening (eScept sum
day). at the Telegraph Building sls
Federal Square.
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1914-07-25

Ihe camp OF the First and Fourth
Brigades at Mt. Gretna next month
VIII be the last camps of the States
organized militia that Governor Tener
will attend while he is Chief Magis-
trate. The Governor has enjoyed his
visits to the camps very much. He
had one division camp, several bri-
gade camps, the rifle practice camps
and some maneuver camps to visit. In
addition he was at Gettysburg during
the great reunion. While he never
served in the Guard, the Governor has
always taken keen interest and more
than one company commander has re-
ceived letters or words of encourage
ment from him. After all, there is
good bit in an official kind word in
keeping a military organization UP to
the scratch, and Adjutant General
Stewart has helped do that more than
once.
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1914-07-25

Notwithstanding Clifford Pinchot's
declaration that Colonel Roosevelt
would speak in the State campaign in
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1914-07-25

Bull MooSers
Wondering at
the Outlook
The review. [volume] (High Point, N.C.) 1908-19??, 1914-04-02

Boys Wash Suits, 8 to g. 81 10 and 81 Is value 69c
Boys Wash Suits to g. 81 so to $500 value $119
Boys Knee Pants, aged to Is 23c pair
Boys 75c Knee Pants ..... ....... 49c.
Boys $50 Pants ... .98 CSC.
All Wool Serge Knee Pants, $500 value, at S119
Mems Caps, SOC, 75c and s1OO value .4 3c
200 Mems Wool Hats, all colors and sizes, from
81 so to So 90 ... go ........ .............. SOC
The review. [volume] (High Point, N.C.) 1908-19??, 1914-04-02
Don't miss this Easter Sale

Mems $3.50 Oxfords, Button and Lace Patent
Leather and Gun Metal .............$2.89
Herman's U. S. Army Oxfords, strictly guaranteed
$500 and IS 90 value $3.50 Misses and Chill
dren's Oxfords, all colors and Sizes at reduction
of rs per cent.
Ladies, 10c. GAUGE Vests. Observation-Disclosures SC
500 Fancy Parasols all colors at great sacrifice
10 Ladies Spring Coats, $4,000 value, choice S1098
White Petticoats, 75c value . ............. 43c
$50 White Dresses, in Crepes, Lawns and Voiles
and Lace, ranging from So SO to $500 at a
sacrifice.
The review. [volume] (High Point, N.C.) 1908-19??, 1914-04-02
DRY GOODS DEPARTMENT

Percales and Ginghams, 1Oc 12c value s 1-2c yd
Apron Bingham. 7c, value. ....... &c yd.
l-2c, Lawn. OBSERVATION-DISCLOSURES SIC yd
White Lawn 1-yard wide ............ Sc yd
SOC. and 75c. Raines all colors. ..... .43c. yd.
25c Poplns, all colors, ...17 lie. yd.
35c. Poplins. =. f. .....................2 3c yd.
Silk Crepes all coors, worth 75c. yd., 43c.
Cotton Crepes, all colors, Csc. value, 18c. yd
Wash Silks. all colors and stripes, 21c yd
Brocade Silk, all c. lors, 75c value 43c. yd.
Linens, all colors Csc value. .18 1-2c. yd,
Linens, all colors, 15c value 91.2c yd.
One Lot of Embroidered WaistiDgs, worth 81 90
= per yd. .................. ..... 29c. yd.
GUC HHtti1gS,. IL 1-HI w.
All Cotton Fancy Daess Goods, Csc and 35c
15c Bed Ticking. NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS.. &c
500 Yards Embroidered Rice Cloth Flouncings,
$50 value. ......: ...............19 c
The review. [volume] (High Point, N.C.) 1908-19??, 1914-04-02

NOTIONS AND HOSIERY DEPARTMENT
Misses and Ladies' Hosiery, 15c value at &c pair
Mems and Ladies' zoe hose ................ lie pair
Mems and Ladies Silk Hose, 19c pair
American Beauty and Jackson Corsets, 100
value ........... ............... .............79c
SOC and 75c Corsets. Observation-Disclosures. ......43
500 Ties Csc, SOC and SOC value. choice 15c
SO Counterpanes, figured blue and red 200
100 Cnlot-roanes, SO value. ............... SIC
Towels, 15c value .... &c. pair
Laties ESQ Hats. ......... 40
Ladies so Hats ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS. .2.29
Ladies 500 Hats. Observation-Disclosures.
MILDLY and Balkan Blouses, 75c value 43c
$50 Princess Slips. OBSERVATION-DISCLOSURES. 500
$50 Gowns, TIC value, .... ................ 80
Mems Work Shirts, Soc, value, 800
The review. [volume] (High Point, N.C.) 1908-19??, 1914-04-02

MEMS AND BOYS CLOTHING DEPARTMENT
Mems $3.50 Pants ............ .............8 9c
Mems $40 and $500 Pants all colors and sizes
at Observation-Disclosures. ... 81 SO
$50 Pairs 81 90 Pants, all wool cashmere, at sos
Mems $3.50 Suits, just received from the mar
ket dill COlOIS, 90 20
Observation-Disclosures. ........... 81 .49
Mems $4,000 Suits . ......................$1 SIP 48
Boys Norfolks, So 90 value, in grey only at 1929
Boys Cashmere Suits, all colors, $500 value g. 80
Boys ZOO Suits .. ...... ........... .......4 So
Boys Wash Suits, 3 to g. 75c. value, .....4 9c
The review. [volume] (High Point, N.C.) 1908-19??, 1914-04-02

We have full and complete line of Trunk Bags
and Suit Cases; at a saving of so per cent
Come early and get your choice.
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1914-02-14
A Fine Amenity from Wilson
to Taft

No Republican President that has lived within time has
been fair and generous with Democracy William
Taft
No Northern Office has dealt literally with the
stored and loyal statesmen of the South
He has enriched the Supreme tribunal of the republic with
strong and great jursts from Louisiana from Georgia
from Tennessee and from regard to
party estate He has drawn upon Democracy
for Cabinet Ministers for Ambassadors for Federal marhas
posmastes by the He has been generous with all
walls magnanmous his conquero and he has been
eddy that the battlefield of modern
politics has known
Shortly after Wilson's Inauguration movement
started in Atlanta to give to Taft the place upon the Supreme
bench that has been the real dream and aspiration his
Mr. Tafts honest but reaconay construction of the Consti
tuition made politically impossible for President Wilson fol
low his nclinaons and comply.
But what gracious and graceful ameny would be
the Democratic Chief Executive finding here place which
there could be parsanshp but for only sound
pe1enced counsel should offer place the Reserve Board of
the Federal Banks to his high minded predecessor William
ard Taft
Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1914-02-14

n WHEN a SnrUeB0r
~. takes his bearings from
Poid,'iS doeS the star
more, and II SO can this De PLAIN
~ seen through the telescope on
the ordinary frdRSit?"
A-The earth turns on its axis
once in S6,16S.6 seconds. The
length Of a mean solar day is
$4,000 seconds The absolute or
sidereal day is therefore 1854
seconds. or minutes 564 sec
onds shorter than the solar
This motion of rotation is from
west over 70 the east. from right
over to the left or from the fig
ure ! over through ~ to n on
the face Of a watch II held back
toward the equator, or toward the
south by any observer in any
north latitude. Then an stars
appear 10 move in the opposite
direction
Our present north aar-D o-
Iaris-is no exception The only
exception would he two stars Jt
the mathon.aticalN exact ocles-
,ial north and south poles I'm