davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Norwich bulletin., 1914-03-24
WATCH YOUR STEP
 BY THE CONDUCTOR
StabiIizer Needed.

 Did you hear bout that 'stabilizer' that man Wright fixed to go on lis flying machine?
 q dunno how it works, but it s somo kind of patent dew-dad hitched on to them sky planes so you can l. fly upside down if you want to. That's
 gonna put tn aeroplane business on
 tn blink, cause nobody's gonna 1ay-
 money to go see a fellow go way Up
 in tn clouds if they ain't no risk to
 it. Might as well charge. admission
 to see a man dig Q posthole
 T wish they'd get a stablhzeT' on
 this female gush that's filling sn tn
 newspapers. They ain't any place in
 tn world nor there ain't any tlnle 1n
 th' world 1nore'n right here anG right
 now that tn women are getIn' 0 let
 ter show.
 What chance has a mar~.ei nut
 got? if your wife goes down eln buys
 8 barrel O flour, you got to pay for t
 ain't you? If you go buy 1t, nGoody
 can make her pay for it. If you prom
 ise to marry girl, you got to one across or tn judge an Juryll cake II
 out O your hide. If she renigs, she can give you tn horse laugh. If you own house an go to sol it, you gotta get her to sign tn leed. If you slap her on the wrist, you se- thirty days; if she wallops you V1th tn rollin' pin. she gets a nice TTritcup in tn paper.
 If you run away, she can ha-e you pinched, but she can walk out any time an leave you. An 'en when you get carried out in wooden kimnno
 she gets most O the property. If she dies, you gotta big funeral bHl, an like as not you go an get stuc}1 cn some widow with six kids an sl2rt all 1 over again.
 Some O this woman's rgntS talks got to be canned. If we don gel q 1 'stabpiIizer' we'll be hyin upside ! down. If they was all like my Lizzie 1 you wouldn't need none. Size can l have all l got. But shucks They's l onlv one Lizzie.
 Hunters avenue. l Stand back and let those women l on
 1 cm on first
 l Look where you sttp.'
Norwich bulletin., 1914-03-24

When I was a young man." declared the man with the iron jaw, 'any young woman who expected a fellow to spend so much money on her would have been dropped with a thud, She would not have been considered at all. Taxfcabs and expensive choco- lates and orchids
 q never sent anything worse than roses in my life, pop" declared the younger edition of himself across the desk earnestly. You don't under stand how much money it takes these days for a fellow to hold up his head"
 Huh. Don't I?" breathed the man with the iron jaw. If you fancy I am existing in ignorance of that fact I should be pleased to draw your at tention to the sheaf of bills in the third drawer at your left! And you have the nerve to ask that your al lowanee be increased! I know why it is--you want to cut splurge be- fore some grill"
 There isn't any particular girl" declared his son. Of course, l have to be absent to 'en-and you can't ask a girl to the opera and expect her to go on the street car in pink satin slippers that cost SIP.
 Great Scott!" gasped his father, falling back aghast Twelve dollars for pair of slippers
 ' ing his breath, who will spend SIP for a dinky pair of slippers is bound to be an extravagant wife and ruin a mans career! Why. when l was a boy a woman could have got six pairs of high shoes for that sum, each war ranted to wear a yeari Why can't a young woman wear sensible clothes to the opera and sit upstairs and enjoy herself? Six dollars for taxi against 20 cents for carfare! It's tune the young woman of to-day thought a little! If she has any real interest in you she'd be glad to help you save $5 SO"
 "Oh nonsense," said his son. They haven't any sentimental feeling about me-or I about them! I'm just re- paving dinners and other parties and they're glad to have some one take 'em around for a good time" Well, that's not my idea at all of the way things should be managed declared his father with warmth don't like any such cold blOoded give and. takel You ought to pick out nice girl that you like and" How can I get married till l earn g lot of money? ?' demanded the young man. Besides, I don't want to get married; neither do the girls. We're too young. Honest, I'm not squander- 1 ing money, dad. l have to hold up my end you know!' .. l T should say you did?" said hi' l father. glaring at the bills in his hand 1 You must use a derrick to get it III 1 high enough! I'm trying to beat into vour head the idea that l want you tt 1 be sensible and not be carried ava! 1 by the extravaganza of the age. won't have you throwing money at tn : birds Your allowance is big enough 1 When I was young man could haV' 1 bought and sold the whole town oI l that allowance!'
 "The cost of living has gone up, l the young man reminded him. It. | hard for me to keep up with the rest 1 It's humiliating, especially whel you're known to be so blamed wei 1 off
 Huh" said his father. What | that got to do with it? Have to mak, | Q fool spendthrift of you just becaus'
 I can afford to do it? S'pose you wan
Norwich bulletin., 1914-03-24
SERVING AS MInpLEMEN.

For the extension of the benefits of parcel post to the consumers through out the country the test which is to be made by direction of the postomce department gives much promise. By the selection of ten postoffices for the trying out of the plan which is being perfected for stimulating parcel post business, and at the same time putting the farmer in close touch with the buying public there should be a quick determination of the success or failure Of the plan. The extension Of parcel post privileges so that farm produce can be sent by mail in crates was but preliminary to putting that extra priv ilege into immediate use, and making it serve as the middleman between the farmer and householder. It offered in itself excellent possibilities to the alert farmer. but the step which the depart ment has now taken to show the op- portunfties which have been opened promises to give in the way of a dem onstration the needed inspiration for the adoption of this business service wherever the rural route permits.
 Particular interest will be centered in this experiment at ten scattered points because of the lessons which it will provide for the remainder of the country It imposes no small amount of detail work upon the carriers and the government in securing and pro- vfding the farmers prices and lists of produce and if it is made Q success it will be because the producers and the householders manifest the dispo- sition to meet the effort at least half
Norwich bulletin., 1914-03-24
LETTERS TO THE EDITOR
Sorry for the Sandwich Boy.

Mir. Editor: Imagine my surprise when, in yesterdays Bulletin, I found that my modest epistle of Saturday had resulted in two calculated replies from the suffrage ranks, Doubtless I should feel like hiding my diminished head instead of which l am placidIy pufipg away at my faithful pipe, as usual, with the inevitable magazine (this time it's the latest number of only waiting for me to adjust my spec tacles.
 Truly. a sense of humor is saving grace! Will the fair sex ever achieve it? Why so eXcitable, lovely women
 Here is what the great Havelock Ellis lwhom the suffragists claim as one of their supporters) says:
 The affectability Cor excitability) of women exposes them to very diabol- ical manifestations. It is also the source of much of what is most an gelic in women. Poets have racked their brains to express and to account for this mixture of heaven and hell We see that the key is really a very simple one: both the heaven and hell of women are but aspects of the same physiological affectability. Seeing this we may see, too that those worthy the devils tail might find, if they suc- ceeded. that they had also shorn the angel of her wings"
 BACHELOR. P S.-Just the same, I sure am sor- ry for that 19 year old sandwich boy and I bet hell never want to hire out again.
 Norwich. March 23, 1914.
Norwich bulletin., 1914-03-24
THE uL sTER SITUATION.

The situation which has arisen in Ulster over the turn which the home rule legislation has taken calls for the exercise of diplomacy and the keeping down of agitation if bloodshed is to be avoided. Not only the situation in the counties of that province where home rule Is so strongly opposed. but the detection among the officers of the army who are unwilling to serve against their countrymen in such a civil war gives the government a big problem to handle. Just what may re- suit from the present state of affairs is uncertain. The large defections are the cause for no little con ncern and it must at the same time be recognized by the Ulstermen how futile is their resistance likely to be if the matter comes to a test of strength
 The situation which now involves the army as well as Ulster cannot fail to obtain the full attention of the gov ernment. Whatever may have been the strength of the Ulster opposition alone it has been strengthened by the position which has been maintained by officers and regiments of the army who are in sympathy with the Unionists' cause and who are opposed to coer- cion ir the north of Ireland It is a situation which calls for adjustment without the spillfng of blood. This should be uppermost in the minds of the government while the inevitable re- suit if there is a. clash cannot fail of realization by all of Ulster, including the leaders. If such a crisis is nec- sary to bring the factions together on 8 sensible basis the time has arrived and reason and common sense rather than prejudice should prevail. If there are any provisions of the proposition or details of the concessions which need to be unfolded wisdom urges that it be done
Norwich bulletin., 1914-03-24

enough, honest enough. smart enough and good looking enough to repre- sent this district in congress and believe that the progressive party has got some one man in each of the other districts of equal size, congressionally speaking. Why not nominate these five men for congress and in return let the progressive party endorse one re- publican state and senatorial ticket? There is no talking turkey to this scheme. If Warren Davis runs again as an independent progressive then there will be another democrat elected. no matter if every, mill wheel in the district is still. The time has arrived in this dear old land of ours when political jobbing is at an end-no ma chine can get it all any more; we might as well acknowledge the corn right now and get busy
 There are more than one and more than ten thousand more in this state | who felt just as I did two years ago. l Roosevelt should be elected but to pre- vent a democratic victory twas safer | to vote for Taft in Connecticut, while | in Pennsylvania, Maine and some other | states Taft men should have voted | for Roosevelt.
 1 But neither one did it, consequent | ly we know the result. Americans all | over the world are holding their heads l in shame while their countrymen are | murdered in Mexico, killed by arms l furnished a band of desperadoes with | a U. S permit. given by raising the | embargo on firearms while the llama | bleats
 It is the duty of every man, repub- l lican. progressive or independent, tc l do all in his power this year to meet
 the democratic host in Connecticut | with a solid front. Give us Judge l Henney for governor and G. Warrer
 Davis for congressman. Both would | surely win especially if other districts 1 do the same. It Is not republican ol
 progressive victory we should think o1 it is to defeat the incompetents
 c. B. MONTGOMERY. Packer, Conn, March q, 1914
Norwich bulletin., 1914-03-24
Rheumatic Pains
 and SwGlIings Co

Rheuma Acts Quickly and Surely
 Money Back as Quickly if It
 Fails.
 Thousands of persons during the last year freed themselves from the bond age of Rheumatism; rid themselves of the torturing pain; reduced the swollen joints; threw away canes and crutches, and from helpless beings be- came able to work and be of use to themselves.
 "Biiou Theatre, Tyrone. Pa. Jan. 13, 191S.-My wife and I, performing sensational bicycle act under the stage name The ToFleys,' are well known ali over the United States and Canada. Last summer I was 50 crip- pied with Sciatic Rheumatism in my hips l could not walk without crutch- es. l spent over $500 but the doctors did nothing for me. 1 had tried near iy every thing, but was finally persuad- ed to try RllEl'MA. By the time | had taken three bottles the Rheuma- tism had entirely left me Since then have sent RHECMA to every friend whom 1 knew had Rheumatism. Two have already told me it has cured them" Guy Torley, l29 summit Ave, St. Paul. Alinn.
 RHEUMA for Rheuma tism, Gout. Lumhago. Sciatiea- Arthritis, Chronic Neuralgia and Kidney disease or money back--and only 50 cents a bot tie
Norwich bulletin., 1914-03-24

anee to the new city planning boards. Or take such questions as municipal ownership, or food distribution. or pub lie markets, or anything involving the new efficiency engineering what stores of information and expert ad- vice the institute could furnish if it were adjusted to public purposes of that character"
 Such institutions should be the nat 4ural source of assistance in the solu- tion of many municipal problems as well as the large number of other questions which arise in connection with community welfare. Such a ser vice as referred to would prove of in estimable value and assistance in every state
Norwich bulletin., 1914-03-24
 g 9-S@ BE 6ye5efty Dean

June: The French complexion fad'' you 1naulre about is probably the craze Tor liquid powders. They are thought to be more wholesome for the skin, as well as more beautifyfng and less like !y to show, than ordinary powder. The follow ing preparation can be made at from any druggist Get 4 ounces spur max from your druggist, dissolve in one half pint hot water and add two teaspoons glycerine It is splendid in effect, looks very natural and clings as if 1t belonged to your skin.
 Lilly: You will find shampooing with a teaspoonful canthrox dissolved in a cup hot water Is a quick and pleasing way to free the scalp of dust. dandruff and excess oil This is a cleanser and fnvi gOrator most appreciated by one whose scalp is either dry. scaly and stored healthful Vigor to my scalp and induced the hair to come in plentifully, with gloss. and greatly enriched color.
 Bess The best blood cleanser I know Is kardene because il acts on the liver and kidneys. and if. as yon sag, you are troubled with severe and constant heada ches, il is an indication that your kidneys and blood need attention. To prepare, put UA~ Ouuce kaFdene -Cfrum the drug storej into one-haf pint alco- hol tVvhlskey should not he usedl. then add one half capfuI sugar and hot wa ter tu make a full quart. A tablespoon dene tcnic gently eXpels poisonous waste from the body and tones up the internal organs so they can do their work. You will find this tonic good to clear up the complexion.
 Lorelel Even the woman of middle age nowadays Is determine q te- lreep her
Norwich bulletin., 1914-03-24

to get into the papers as the gilded chap who gives big tips anu never wears the same tie twice.'
 lou don't understand said the young man. T might as well retire to a cave as to keep up the struggle on what I have now. The girls won't stand for itl All the fellows do those things for 'em and"
 By all means!" said the man with the iron jaw. Do they expect dia monds on their birthdays, too?"
 They wouldn't accept anything of any value!" declared his son.
 The man with the iron Jaw choked. "Oh, no-nothing but $20 bouquets and $2 a pound bonbons! Retiring little things-with their SIP slippers! When was a young man SIP would have supported a whole family in luxury for week."
 Bob Carter's father" said the young man, casually gives Bob just twice as much money as l have to spend"
 ''Whati' shouted the man with the iron jaw. "Old Carter isn't in it with me! Why, he came near bankruptcy last year! If he can give that little whiffet of a son of his as much as that I'll not have them growing over my family"
 Do I get the doubled aIlowance?' ?'' inquired the young man.
 s1ll triple it. said the man with the iron jaw. 'I guess a young fel- low needs more money nowadays.'- Chicago News.
Norwich bulletin., 1914-03-24
OY tOSTLy D06H

Hesh down and who can blame her. now mat present styles demand slimness? 1 diWays recommend parnotis (which l hlH up at homeD as the safest, cheap ounces parnotis a druggists and dis solve in one and one-half pints hot water. Cool, strain. and take a table spoonful before each meal. Dieting or exercise Is not necessary with thls.
 Mrs. &: My own experience with wrinkles was three years ago when l removed them with very simple in expensive preparation which | made Dy mixing an ounce of aImozoin (from my druggists( in one half pint cold water and adding two teaspOonIuls gIycerine. This, by contracting the and keeps the surface circulation of the blood good that perfectly nat ural glow develops in the cheeks have used it ever since.
 Madge: No. you need not have lots of money in order to give your hair and scalp perfect care. 1 often recommend many made-at- home items which are even better than hfgh-priced patents As a hair tonic l get an uonce of quin- Zoin at the druggists. dissolve il in Une-Half pint of alcohol and add one half pint of water. Rub a little at q time well into the scalp and your dan drum will disappear and you will Keep your scalp healthy.
 Exie: I brighten my eyes and rest them when tired by putting q few drops of crystos solution into each and bathing the lids with the same make the tonic by getting ounce of crys- tos from the drug store and dtssolvlng it in a pint of clear water. It will not smart and Is soothing and healing. Ii is the safest way of making the eyes sparkling and expressive.
 Betty Deans Beauty Book, s. CAdv.)
Norwich bulletin., 1914-03-24
We Refuse to Guess

Referring to the bad habit that many human beings have of overeatfng, it was said long ago that they dug their graves with their teeth. What will be the epitaph of an Ambassador whose false sense of humor, as displayed at a dinner, sets up his tombstone before the merry party disperses New York World
Norwich bulletin., 1914-03-24
Because She Knows the snu

When a boy is continually complain ing about the treatment he receives from his teachers his mother is pretty sure to decide that there must be something the matter with the teach ers.-ChiCago Record Herald.
Norwich bulletin., 1914-03-24

Business must center it's hope on the chance that there will be q residue af- ter the department of justice and the interstate commerce commission get through with the New Haven.
Norwich bulletin., 1914-03-24

Wise is the fellow who has learned the lesson of overcoming waste so thoroughly as to swear off on Say" "Let me tell you" or Listen to me- as a preface to every remark
Norwich bulletin., 1914-03-24
Baseball in His Debt,

The late George Westinghouse had every moral right to draw huge royal ties from the baseball business. He invented, as far as America is con cerned, the Saturday half-honday.- New York Press
Norwich bulletin., 1914-03-24

General Villa is making such head way that there is ground for wonder ing how he will conduct himself when there are no more Federals to con- Quer.
Norwich bulletin., 1914-03-24

Col. Goethals declares that he is no speechmaker but-he will be more ap- plauded for his honesty and make more friends by just telling a good story.
Norwich bulletin., 1914-03-24

When an ocean trip takes the wings off the Imperator's eagle it is easy to imagine what it would do to a fragile aeroplane whether 1t had a hydro head piece or not.
Norwich bulletin., 1914-03-24

Those who are depending upon the snow to keep the unsightIy and unat- tractive places covered must tackle their task before long.
Norwich bulletin., 1914-03-24

The occasional reports of new buck etshops indicate that the other swim ding schemes are allowing the peo- pie to horde up their money too rapid 1v
Norwich bulletin., 1914-03-24

The secretary of state in spending his birthday in his office must have heard of the practice of some of the great captains of industry.
Norwich bulletin., 1914-03-24

The introduction of a health depart ment into the Congressional Record by Senator Tillman ought to be a good circulation builder and temper regula- tor
Norwich bulletin., 1914-03-24

With a dining room. bedroom and reception hall in the Paris prison Mme CaiHaux promises to be the best "celIer'' in France
Norwich bulletin., 1914-03-24

The man on the corner says: If you can't do anything more to help along the city beautiful movement at least look pleasant
Norwich bulletin., 1914-03-24

It will be more interesting to hear what President Wilson has to say after his third year in office in anticipa- ton of coming campaign
Norwich bulletin., 1914-03-24
EDITORIAL NOTES,

Great Britain is at the present time suffering from Ulsteritis, temperature high, operation probable.
Norwich bulletin., 1914-03-24

Under the present condition milk is worth just about all that is asked for it: but t is impossible to blame the consumer when he kicks about the up- ward move naent on general principles.
Norwich bulletin., 1914-03-24
Reqular Eva Tanuuay

Governor Colquitt probably knows that those additional troops are sent to the border to keep Texas straight. but Press.
Norwich bulletin., 1914-03-24

Ulster shouldn't become puffed up by any false pride over the observance of Orange day throughout this coun- try.
Norwich bulletin., 1914-03-24

Whether war ever results or not it would require but slight provocation just now to cause bioodshed in Ulster.
Norwich bulletin., 1914-03-24

Every good undertaking has it's set backs but it will be impossible for spring to postpone her visit long
Norwich bulletin., 1914-03-24
MISS M. C. ADLES Hail, Scalp and EaceSpec!aLs!
THE NEW HATS FLARE

TIE NEW HAT FLNHE which means that the hair is very spicuous. Dent select d Spring hat until your hair is abundant and stylisf1y dressed. You'll be surprised to find then that any hat becomes you. Miss Adles has some splendid braids and bands to build out thin hair.
 3o6 MAIN ST., Next to Chelsea Bank
 Tel 652-4,
Norwich bulletin., 1914-03-24
UNSICHTLY HAIR CROWTHS
 INSTANTLY REMOVED

Women with growths of hair or '-fuzz'' on lip. chm. cheek neck or often become So used to it that they imagine others are blind tn 1t also Theg become 90 indifferent these unbeautiful groWths that they forget how grating the sight is to their friends.
 Wnlle medical science knows of chemical agent Whlch will eradicate hair permanently without sfri- ous injury. 1t Is established scientific that Fl Rado will remove hair for very lOng time. and in an absolutely safe. simple. and thorough manner ForeTer after the hair he kept from being no ueeable- E Rado acts instantly. X drops. q simple application and matter how coarse the hair is. ii it dissolved and in few moments Is
 In this city Fl Rado is
 The RroadWav pbar011cv g.
Norwich bulletin., 1914-03-24


 Many physicians use the ingredients in Fl Rade for hair removing which shows how perfectly ha n- Iess II ls The skin Is left smooth and 7elVety even Whtef than before. Fl Rado is becoming as indis- penssoie toilet article face cream
 You ned hare hesitation in calling TOT II than in asking for and using cold cram "et 3oc or sl- co size bottle today. Test it on your arm Prove for yourself it will do e4er7trin: clauned Your money back if you are not entfreiy pieasNd IT inconvenient to call your druggist :, II will be a right 10 order direct from Pilgrim Mfg Co., New York Valuable information sent on re- quest
 sold and recon mended by lSSrINQI t.l, Ill
Norwich bulletin., 1914-03-24
BRINGING FATHER TO TIME

to get into the papers as the gilded chap who gives big tips anu never wears the same tie twice.'
Norwich bulletin., 1914-03-24

In this city Fl Rado is sold and The Broadway Pharmacy. Lee & Osgood
Norwich bulletin., 1914-03-24

Lorelel: Even the woman of middle age nowad days Is determine q te4 keep her