The Richmond Virginian. (Richmond, Va.) 1910-1920, 1914-12-21
!, Jester at the Court of King Aicoh,


\ Jester the Court of King Alcohol.
J see that the EDITOR of the Roanoke Times
has turned humorist
He anxious to quality as chief Jester at
the court OF King Alcohol
He seems TO have cultivated leanings in that
beginning of the Statewide campaign he made
hop, skip and jump and landed right in the
midst of the moist and voube<centers of anti
prohibition sentiment in the dry States of
Georgia, Ala hama and possibly few others.
Turning few backward and forward hand
springs and few mixed gyrations, the versatile
editor soon won the confidence of the bibulous
citizens of those centers who swore that there
was such thing, and had been, as
prohibition in those States.
Standing his head. twiddting his toes in
the air, the Roanoke editor viewed the land
scape and concluded that prohibition did
not prohibit, far he could see, to any
noticeable appreciate extent
Collogung for few hours in each place
with natives of like desire and intent. he gath
cred, in all those places. information and evil
dence, bodies Of it. by the quart and by the
Jug, to the effect that there was more liquor
sold, much more several times as much, indeed.
in the olden days of the multiplied and open
harrooms,
Then coming back TO his office in Virginia
the editor began long seres of extravaganc-s.
running Up nearly, if not quite into the TWEEN
ties, on prohibition he observed ii and
possibly experienced it. and heard tell of it from
others Who had observed It and experienced It in
those several dry communities
Being editor he could FIJI any amount of space
In his own paper. And being editor he was OF
course, in no wise responsible to anybody about
the quality of the matter published. Hence
there continual trickle, almost a runiet,
of anti-prohibition sentiment running through
the columns of the Roanoke Times during the
campaign.
The readers of the paper in Lynchburg Roam
oke and the great Southwest read the editorials.
laughed at the sales of wit and the ehulltions
of humor--and voted by overwhelming
jory for prohibition. They the EDITORS
joke
Now after practicing private apparently
few interesting eyr2tions the kings jester
comes bat with set OF jokes and divert
ing performances.
He wants, or processes to want, which is the
same thing in q jokesmith the ship of State
sweep clean and battened down TO the last inch.
that not drop of anything shall be able 10
percolate ooze or run down between the
cracks, or otherwise reach the thirsty and per-
ishing people who dared to vote for prohini-
ton.
Yes the people voted for prohibition. now
let en- have it good and plenty. Soak EN-
with it. Rub ii in. DO not let drop come
anigh them Don't let Whit blow across the
borders of the old Commonwealth Ii Brother
Williams were not such an inveterate joker you
would think he positively and lrretrievaby
peeved by the the people OF Virginia acted
on the 22nd of last September.
But he isn't peeved. He isn't serious
He is just joking. He is still Joking with the
leaders of the Anti-saloon League. Eddie
Hirsch. and the other imported manager. and
the secretary of the Self-Government Associa-
ton Of Virginia, all those wise quit playing
with that big buzz-saw down in Richmond
They knew when they had enough. But they
not humorists, They could not see the
joke in it, 1t takes a humorist 70 see the
funny side of buzz-s1w. A few fingers more
or less are a small matter to your true hu-
morist
So Brother Williams keeps at it-keeps on q:
1t. He lust won't quit He wants to prepare
| the LIQUOR legislation for the coming Legtsfa-
ture. He knows Just what Israel ought to do
in the premises. The Anti Saloon League isn't
IL it Indeed, is nowhere in sight DR.. Cannon
is a back number. McAlster is decidedly pase
None of tho men who led the campaign and
fought the battle through are fit to lead in the
preparation of laws for enforcement They are
too conservative trnd reactionarv. suit the
new fedged prohihitionist Of the Roanoke Times
Times.
SO runs his humor on stream of bubbles. an
avalanche of froth, whirlwind Of fine dust
But nobody takes it for anything but just hu-
NOR, pleasantly, jokes The friends of prohibit
ton. those who have fought tor IT for years
who have been in the thick of the battle for 3
nor pushed into any extreme or foolish action
BY the jibes of a humorist.
Neither will they be turned aside from the
completion OF the great work that they have
/ brought forward TO its present state with such
splendid success. Nor will the people of Virginia
! be blinded by the handsfull of fine dust cast up
by the avowed enemies of prohibition, nor be
betrayed into any sort OF distrust or reputation
Ct their leaders in this great enterprise
T. II. LIGHT.