davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1914-06-21
Lesson XIThe Life History of Prof 0. u. Bojack BUS
'Doc) of Fcksvile, an Inspiration and Guide

Manager flew past on his tin bicycle,
his little alpaca coattalls fiutterng panic
stricken in the wind. After him swept
the Boss. afoot. and sweating like a
mint Julep. Next came all the Office
Help - running. painting, humping
sweating-trying to pass the feet hoofed
Boss to show him how businesslike they
could move along, and maybe get a
dollar raise.
Prof didn't know what was up. lie
thought they were all chasing to see the
morning train come In, or something
important like that. and he fell In line
too, but the field got by him easily
Some one told him 1t was dinner time.
Everybody had to be back at the factory
in 81 minutes and punch the clock
The Boss had to do 1t in 81 fiat too. II
he didn't, the others didn't. He was
nfpped by his own rule.
When Prof saw all this high tension
performance his first impulse was &c
beat 1t back to Chicago and wait fol-
that elevator job. But on second thought
1t occurred to him that Statesmen only
have to make this speed bluff when al
the Home Office. On the Road all they
have to do is to get In to breakfast ant
other meals before tho dining room
closes.
So Prof turned around and headed
again for the Factory. Before he got
there the 81 minutes were up. and the
sweating army of PSYCHOLOGISTS swep,
past him again in a cloud of mulattC
dust and disappeared into the grea
Works like so many bazeeks into an eyff
Prof was ushered into the large cared
presence of the Sales Manager, who sal
majestically enthroned upon revolvine
chair before a mighty Rolltop. His little
coattails peeped out at Pr6ff through
the Stats at the back, and winked.
The Sales Manager was pouring owe,
some formidable legal looking document
1t was only a village agency contract
of course, but the bluff was good nd h,
paid no attention to Prof. Prof $1,000
there for about twenty-five minutes lat
ting flies with his hat. Then he coughet
and sneezed a few dozen times to at
| tract attention, and cleared his throa
until II was so clear you could Sc,
through It. No appreclable results.
At length the Sales Manager locke;
| up and said in n barbed wire voice, "Dt
you wish to see me?" Prof said he
been having that wild JOY for an hour
and would much prefer 10 talk to hin
for a change. Prof said this to himself
What he said to the Sales Manager Wa
as per follows: "Yessir" Which onl,
The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1914-06-21
HOW EPIGRAMS ARE MADE.

THE head epigrammatist OF the
great wit and humor factory
bent over his work bench and
rested his gaze upon an epigram that
had been used and used until 1t was
cracked and frazzled.
ITS shame to throw it away" he
said, "for / believe 1t can stlll be turned
about so that 1t will have a commercial
value. / know what I will do. will
offer prize to the workman who brings
in the best new twist"
So when the workmen were gathered
in the room he told them that he
wanted them to beat on, a new and
clever turn upon the old motto: "A bird
in the hand is worth two in the bush"
He gave them just one four at their
anvils. with a monetary prize for the
best effort and honorable mention for
the others. And union wages OF course
for all.
When the time was up this assort-
ment was handed in.
IA chauffeur in tho front seat Is
worth two under the motor car"
~ kiss in the dark is worth two under
the electric light"
"a grain of sand on the beach In
worth two in the eye"
"A gift from a husband after mar
riage is worth two from lover before
"a suffragette on a hunger strike in
a prison is worth two doing damage at
large
"a weeks wages In bank Ia worth
two in a trousers pocket that the WHO
is going through at night"
And while the first five received hon
orable mention, 1t was the last onS chat
won the prize.
The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1914-06-21

When the week was UP Prof re-
ported again at the Sales Managers
office. He found that astute little
Pretzel still porting over the same old
agency contract. his fingers tangled In
his hair. He was evolving some mighty
idea and Prof dare not disturb him.
Prof. thought Of the old adagc. "un-
easy lies the head that wears the bluff
and sighed his soul to the carefree
Road where all a Salesman has to do
Is work.
Before shutdown the Sales Manager
looked up, and threw slant OF mock
surprise when he saw Proff standing
there with one tagged foot on the other,
trying to sit down on himself and rest.
Even then he didn't offer Prof. camp
stool. He didn't think of II. He had
never been outside the County. Big
foreign buyers visiting the Works al
ways got the same little courtesics that
Prof got.
Finally the Sales Manager with his
little coat told Prof that ne was to
be sent Off to one OF the Branches and
asked him how soon he could get ready.
Next Prof was put under a five thou
sand dollar bond by an obliging bonding
company, and his Salary Account scored
UP with the premium. II was necessary
to put Prof under a nominal bond like
this because the Firm was about to
hand him twenty-five dollars expense
money.
In due time Prof was given the %
discs and he signed eleven different
vouchers for them. This was neces-
sary under the new System which some
| barber out of a job had installed for
the Firm. Then Prof was put aboard
nice Day Coach and was soon slam
ming along to the Branch town.
Prof had never come face to face
with a Branch Manager before. and sc
he had no idea what an Important Com
mercial Figure looked like. His first
experience came when he towed up to
the Branch on Monday morning. Al
| first he thought he was talking to q
New York police lieutenant. Then he
! thought perhaps he was UP against a
Court Martial by mistake.
In fact Prof didn't know what ne
thought. He didn't have time to dc
much coherent thinking before the
Branch Manager began firing n lot o
I rigid questions at him. Every time Prof,
started to reply, everything was inter
rupted by the Branch Manager having
to order the sallow faced stenographei
] lady around, and give various dictatoria
The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1914-06-21

directions to the long necked book
keeper with the hacking cough.
PROM wondered why the Bookkeeper
stood for ii all, but learned later tina.
comrade B-Keeper had eleven children
and motorcycle to support. Prof
| also learned that the Bookkeeper had
formerly been the Branch Manager and
the Branch Manager mad been the Office
Boy under him.
1t seems that Dear Firm out at Lobb-
vile had n ratty habit OF making CHEEKY
little shifts like this. thereby promoting
perfect harmony at every Branch. No
| body ever spoke to anybody else except
on business. Outside the Office they
| couldn't see one another a foot away.
| At this particular Branch tho Book
| keeper was simply taking orders and ly-
ing low for the sweet day when Dear
Firm would restore him to the Man
| agership and put the present Manager
, back to licking stamps and bringing
| up the mail from the Post Office. Then's
| when he'd get his good old pound Of
flesh, by heavinls. and don't let anybody
forget II!
To make a long story about twenty
two chapters shorter. inside three hours
after Prof arrived at this happy hive Of
industry he had been given his Route
List and his Catalogues and Discount
Sheets and Expense Money and Sample
Typewriter and his Railroad Ticket and
Forty Cent Lunch. and had been put
aboard a milk train that was headed for
the sticks Of Arkansas.
1t was all done in such hurry that
Prof. was dazed and numb and didn't
| 70 yat
train hit a cow. jumped the track and
landed In a tree. Then Prof realized
for the first time that he was a full
rugged Salesman splashing around In
all the comforts of the Road.
While the wreck crew is trying to
coax Proff's train down out OF the tree
we will I'LL in the time by saying that
somewhere between the factory town OF
Lobbvire and the spinach bush OF
Arkansas Prof mislaid his whole outfit
OF practical knowledge Of typewriter
manufacture and also his brand new
Selling Talk.
When he called on his first Prospect
he didn't know whether he would be
able to tell typewriter from a sewing
machine. unless he saw them both close
together, and to save his jaegers he
couldn't think up a single thing to say
about his line, either for 1t or against 1t.
He simply wiped his chin and trusted
to luck.
But luck is never with the Salesman
who doesn't know his line. 1t is only
the Boys higher up who can know
nothing about the goods and not 9vaAr
themselves. At the very first place
where Prof handed in his wooden busi-
J ness card they had typewriter that
wouldn't work, and asked Prof to take
young slant at 1t.
: Prof said that what the typewriter
really needed was new cooling tank
a different kind Of piston rod, and 9
set OF new valves, and he instructed
his bedevilers to box 1t up and send II
! to the factory at once. He said the
factory would he only too pleased Il
repair 1t free Of charge. He was new
Salesman.
J Two weeks later Prof was looking for
another job The typewriter he had
The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1914-06-21

goes to show ore how little one knows
OF what one may be thinking of one in
ones presence.
Prof then told his story and answered
a lot of questions as TO his age, educa-
ton, habits, past performances. condi-
ton Of health. prenatal influence, vac
cination marks, prison record and 40
on. Prof volunteered the additional
news that he wore an is inch collar,
size No. II socks, and had the ini.al
81 cnshrined on all his understands.
but the Sales Manager said this was
not so necessary.
Lastly the question of salary came
up. On account of Prof having had DO
experience, said the $. NJ, he would
lave to go through the trial heats on Il
nominal penalty, but after he once
proved his speed, why then, yes, then
&c.
The S. NJ. then Embossed a vivid de-
scription of The Future. 1t was 80
realistic that two or three times Prof
felt 1t brush against his face and heard
1t purr. Next the s. NJ. took Prof in
and introduced him to the Boss. The
Boss sized Prof up with the unfailing
eye of Boss, and likewise shifted from
his presidential chest large consign-
ment of eloquence about perseverance,
and The Future. Prof then returned tc
the Sales Managers stall. pushing
through string Of Offices filled with
busy Futurlsts.
Prof did not deny the soundness of
all this slusherino about The Future
hut what he wanted to know was a
little something about The Present. In
fact Prof believed there was nothing
In Time anyway but tho Eternal
Present, and so naturally he wanted
to get as much of line on II as pos.
sible. In other words. he wanted to
know how much cash he was going to
pull down at the getaway. So he politely
asked brother Sales Manager.
Brother Sales Manager replied that
they would start Prof off at a salary OF
$50 month and So a day for travelling
expenses. Prof asked II they were sure
they could afford II. Brother s. NJ. re.
piled that this was really only nomina
salary. He said that some of their bes
men were drawing as high as 500 pei
month, and the Poleela Bird was not ye
on the wing.
This looked good enough to Prof
and so he got into a pair of overall.
and went into the Factory and learned
all about the manufacturing end of tn,
business. When the twenty-four hours
were up Prof had 50 much practica
knowledge that he didn't know what I,
do with it all SO he began giving som,
Of 1t to the Superintendent and to tn,
! various foremen and other old hand
that came along. This pleased then
very much and helped them to turf
out a far better product.
The next week was spent In tn
factory's School for Statesmen. Prof be
came so proficient that he could take
typewriter apart and put 1t togethe
! again so skilfully that you wouldn'
know 1t had been monkeyed with at al
. unless you tried to write on It, Prot
also learned how to deliver a powerful
Selling Talk. 1t was s'\ convincing II
spots that It was all the Head In
I structor could do to keep from buying
, machine from Prof AMI paying for
, on the spot. He had to plug up hi
! ears and look away from Prom.
The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1914-06-21

a cold thorny rebuke from the Branch
Manager. telling him how surprised The
Writer was that he didn't remedy the
little defect himself. &C. In fact
The Writer would have spent very
delightful afternoon calling Prof down.
but Prof would still have had his
thirty dollar Job. As It was. he had
The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1914-06-21

sent in to the factory for repairs was
somebody else's make. 1t served Prof
right. He had no business in the fist
place to send 1t to the factory. He
should have sent Il to the Branch.
Had he done this. everything would
have been all right. The Branch Man
ager wouldn't have known the differ
ence.
OF course Prof would have received
The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1914-06-21

~ ROFESSOR O. u. BOJACK BUS
- Doc.) of Hicksville was born at
i the age when most children are.
Little ia Spown of his ancestors
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1914-07-14
TAX EQUALIZATION
LEADS TO A $4,000
RAISE IN HOUSTON

Perry, Ga, July 13,-The tax asses
sors of Houston county have finished
their work and valuation of the prop
erty shows an increase of $535,OO0.
The valuation of all the property for
1918 was $3,SO8,O37, while the figures
of the equalizers put the valuation for
1914 at $4,943,O37.
There have been a dozen complaints
against the valuations of the equaliz-
ers, all of which were accepted after
meeting of the taxpayers and equal
izers. A large number of the taxpay-
ers voluntarily increased the valua'
lions over last year when making re-
turns for this year. Of the increase
100000 represents property discover
ed and not returned in 1918.
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1914-07-14
PACKING House ASSURED
CITY OF MOULTRIE
Her Chamber Of Commerce
is Keeping Busy

Moultrie, Ga, July 13.-That live
chamber of commerce is a decided
factor in the upbuilding of a commun-
| ity has been amply demonstrated by
the establishment of a packing house
in this city. This plant consists of j
four-story brick building with all the
| latest cOnveniencies and modern ma
chinery, and of sufficient capacity to
care for the slaughter of one hundred
head of cattle and three hundred head
of hogs per day. Preparatory to the
successful conduct of the business.
the Chamber of Commerce started a
campaign among the farmers for
reduction in cotton acreage and the
planting of feed stuff. The result is
that more hogs are being raised in
the county this year than ever be-
fore.
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1914-07-14
COUNTY UNIT PLAN BILL
MEETING WITH FAVOR

Atlanta, Ca, July 13.-The joint
bills recently introduced in the house
and senate making the county unit
plan a law have received much fav-
orable comment and have many out
spoken advocates in both branches of
the general assembly.
The bill was sponsored in the SEN
ate by fourteen senators and in the
house by six representatives. Senator
McGregor, of the nineteenth district,
introduced the bill in the senate, and
besides his own name on the bill
there appeared the name of the fol-
lowing thirteen senator's:
Allen, Stark, Miller, Burtz, Moore,
Johnson, Spinks, Jones, w. w, Bull
loch, Pope, Turner and Taylor The
bill was introduced in the house by
Representative G. c Edmondson, who
drew the bill and bore, in addition,
the names of Representative Full
bright, McCrory, borough, Collins
and Strickland.
The bills provide that Gin ascertain
ing and declaring the results in all
primary elections held in accordance
with the provisions of the law gov
erning primary elections in this state,
the unit rule shall be inviolable in
making nominations of candidates for
Office filled by statewide votes"
The bill provides that in case of a
tie between candidates the candidata
receiving the largest number Of pom
ular votes shall be declared elected.
1t is also provided that the party au-
thorities may formulate additional
rules governing conventions.
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1914-07-14
WILL PURCHASE A FARM
and SETTLE In SUMTER
Albanian Thinks This An
Ideal Locality

Mr.. S. E. Crane, Mrs. Crane and I'M
Gle, Mr.. J. L. Barnes, of Atlanta, ar
rived yesterday in their car from the
capital city. They are making an eX-
tended tour of middle and south Geor-
gia, inspecting crops and lands and
came to Sumter as the garden spot of
this vast productive area. MIR. Crane
states that he has never seen finer
crops anywhere, and proposes buying
farm near Americas, if he can find
a desirable one, on the market, as the
city and county are very much to his
liking.
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1914-07-14
FARMERS INSTITUTES
FOR south GEORGIA

Athens, Ga, July 13.-The following
dates have been announced by tue
State College of Agriculture for farm
ers' Institutes in the southern part of
the state, extension workers from the
college attending each of these meet
ings:
Schedule of Institutes.
July 14-Grady, Cairo, farm of !.
Il. Williams.
July 15-Decatur, cambridge.
July 16-Miller, Colquitt.
July 17-Calhoun, Edison, farm Of
Mr.. Hammock
July 1S-Clay, Fl Gaines, farm of ].
w. West.
July 2O-Randolph, Springvale.
July 21-Terrell, Bronwocd.
July 22-Lee, Leesburg.
July 23-Sumter, Leslie, men car
ried from Americas in autos.
July 24-Stewart, Lumpkin, farm Of
E. L. Carter, miles southwest of
Lumpkin.
July 25-Marion, Wallis Crossing.
July 27-Chattahoochee Cusseta.
July 2S-Muscogee, Gentian, farm
of J. B. David.
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1914-07-14
GIFT OF $50 TO GROW
INTO MANY MILLION

Berlin, July 13.-The Burgomaster
Of Weida is a far-sighted man and
ingenious. To commemorate his six
tieth birthday he has just given the
town a present of S50-with the long
est string on record tied to it. The
town must "save" the interest AMI
compound interest until the year 1854
"a trife of three and half centur-
les. On May 20, 1854, the 4OOth ami
versary of the burgomaster's birth, 70
per cent of the accumulated interest
will be placed at the disposal of the
Town Council for public purposes.
The balance is to be redeposited as
capital and kept at interest for fur
Their 100 years. No interest below 4
per cent shall be accepted. The town
council has gratefully agreed to the
conditions, the official statitician hav-
ing figured out that the community in
1884 will be the opulent possessor o.
$250,000 under the terms of the
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1914-07-14

It is predicted that white will again
be very popular this summer; certain
ly nothing is more suited to the sea-
son, is cooler or daintier. There VIII De
tailormades of white and coats and
capes as well. Poplins, ratine, VelVet
rep, MORE and taffeta are all being
shown in white for these purposes. on
coats and capes that flare slightly at
the bottom, and it is necessary that
they do, 1t is modish to have a colored
lining. Another pretty touch Is the
vestee of silk gauze held in place by
single ornament of passementerie, lap
is lazuli or amber or a broad, contrast
ing girdle.
The costume shown In Sl75-S255
shows the effectiveness Of such vest
White ratine Is the material used, with
collar, revers and girdle of black satin;
the vest of brocaded silk gauze crosses
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1914-07-14
THRIFTY CITY OF MOUL-
TRIE GETS SIXTH RAILROAD
Another Line Building TO
lustllDg City

Moultrie, Ga, July 13.-The sixth
railroad for this city is now an as
sured fact, judging from petition
for a charter being published in thl
local papers. w. E. Aycock and as
sociates ask for charter for the
Moultrie Southwestern Railway Com
pany with it's principal office in Col
quit county. The direction of the
road will be southwesterly from this
city and run through the counties Of
Colquitt, Mitchell, Grady and Decatur
to the Florida line. Four miles of the
road is already completed and trains
running over it, while the entire right
of way has been acquired and the
construction work is being pushed as
rapidly as possible. This road will
develop some of the best agricultural
lands in the counties through which
it passes, these lands being undevel-
oped for lack of transportation facil-
tiles. AS soon as the petition is pub
lished the required length of time the
charter will be granted by the Secre-
tary of State.
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1914-07-14

office clock, three gasoline torchesJ
one office heater, thirty-seven fourteen
quart galvanized pans, fourteen ten-
quart galvanized buckets.
Levied on as the property of the
Maddox Canneries Co. For State and
County Taxes for the year 1918.
This Sth DAY of July, 1915
LUCIUS HARVEY,
Deputy Sheriff, Sumter County.
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1914-07-14
Legal Advertisements
Notice! Notice!
GEORGIA, Webster County:

bEOINb1a, w eDSLer -SOuuly.
VIII be let out at public cutlery be-
for the Court House door in Preston
on the first Tuesday in August next, at
IL O'clock A. M, a contract to build
a Turnpike on Slaughter Creek, in the
1105th District of said County at the
place known as the Tyler Ford.
Said Turnpike to be 240 yards long,
more or less, with an average of four
feet in height, and sixteen feet wide
on the top, with a base made by the
sliding of the dirt in the building of
said Turnpike.
The Commissioners reserving the
right to reject any and all bids, and of
contracting with any party or parties
to build said Turnpike, under the laws
as embodied in Sections 3S8 and 3S9 of
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1914-07-14
.PARSON At LINDALE
SAYS He SAW GHOST

Rome, Ga, July 13.-The mill vii
lage of Lindale has been thrown into
a ferver of excitement by reports of a
ghost" which is said to have ap-
peared regularly at midnight hour for
the past ten days near the power
house of the Georgia Railway AMI
Power company. Reports as to the
apparation were not given much ere
dence until vouched for by Rev. J. E.
Smith, pastor of the Lindale Baptist
church, and a companion of Thomas
Proudfoot, of Silver Creek. The min
lister declares that the ghost IVES
about the size and shape of a white
calf or a large dog; that it appeared
in the road directly in front of a
mule he was driving, paused for a
moment and disappeared, as if the
earth had swallowed it.
A volunteer posse, armed with shot
guns, revolyers and army guns, have
been on the lockout for the ghost, but
have failed to discover any trace d
it.
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1914-07-14

1EORGIA-sumter County.

GEORGIA-Sumter County.
=, Will be sold before the court house
door. on the first Tuesday in August
1914 the following described property
to-wit:
One platform wagon scale, made by
Rome Scale Manufacturing Co., one
Landcaster Drill Press, one Meadeville
Bench Vice, one Chain Pipe Vice
Twenty-Five feet two inch shafting, six
Hanger Boxes and eight Pullies, One
Force Pump, made by Fairbanks
Morse Co. One piece of eight-inch
Rubber Betting, twenty feet long
Eight pieces of Rubber Betting, two tt
four inches wide and ten to twent,
fleet long. Two Peach Peelers, on
Americus times-recorder. [volume] (Americus, Ga.) 1891-current, 1914-07-14
VESTEES OF BROCADED SILK ARE HELD
IN PLACE BY A BROAD GlRDLE
OR A SINGLE ORNAMENT.

surplice fashion and extends below the
girdle in two broad tabs. A two gored.
modishly draped skirt is another smart
touch.
This costume requires for size SO, ~
yards of AZ inch material for the blouse
(S175) and ~ yards Of the same width
for the skirt (S255). A simple, one
piece frock developed in white cloth is
shown in the other design; it has a
collar and girdle of printed tussah and.
by way of novelty, large, square belt
buckle. full length raglan sleeve is
a feature, and straight, three piece
skirt completes the dress.
For size SO this design needs Az
yards Of SO inch material.
No. S175-sizes 80 to az.
No 8255-sizes % to 80.
No 8125-sizes "a to "A.
Each pattern Is cents.