Ottumwa tri-weekly courier. [volume] (Ottumwa, Iowa) 1903-1916, 1914-10-13
THE CELLAR HOLE AND THE SEWER HOLE
By Herbert Kaufman
.uthOr of do Something! Be SOmethingw

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A coal cart stopped before an office building in
Washington and the driver dismounted, removed the
cover from a manhole, ran out his chute, and proceeded
TO empty the load. An old negro strolled over and
stood watching him. Suddenly the black man glanced
down and Immediately burst into a fit of uncomfortable
laughter, which continued for several minutes. The cart
driver looked at him in amusement. Say, Uncle" he
asked, do you always laugh when you see coal going
into a cellar?" The negro %sputtered around a few
moments and then, holding his hands to his aching sides,
managed to say, "No, sab, but l jest busts when | sees
it goin' down a sewer"
The advertiser who displays lack Of judgment in
selecting the newspapers which carry his copy often
confuses the sewer and the cellar.
All the money that is put into newspapers isn't taken
out again, by any means. The fact that all papers
possess a certain physical likeness, doesn't necessarily
signify a similarity in character, and it's character in
a newspaper that brings returns. The editor who con-
ducts a journalistic sewer finds a different class of
readers than the publisher who respects himself enough
to respect his readers.
What goes into a newspaper largely determines the
class of homes into which the newspaper goes. An
irresponsible, sca~ndalmongering, undertaking sheet is
certainly not supported by the buying classes of people.
1t may be perused by thousands Of readers, but such
readers are seldom purchasers of advertised goods.
It's the clean-cut, steady, normal-minded citizens
who form the bone and sinew and muscle of the COM
munity. It's the sane, self respecting, dependable news
paper that enters their homes and it's the home sale
that indicates the strength of an advertising medium.
No clean minded father of a family wishes to have
his wife and children brought in contact with the most
maudlin and banal phases of life. He defends them
from the sensational editor and the unpleasant adver-
tiser. He subscribes to a newspaper which he does not
fear to leave about the house.
Therefore, the respectable newspaper can always be
counted upon to produce more sales than one which may
even own aslarger circulation but whose distribution is
among Improbable citizens.
You can no more expect to sell goods to people who
haven't money than you can hope to pluck oysters from
rose bushes.
It isn't the number Of readers reached, but the num-
Der of readers whose purses can be reached, that consti-
tutes the value of circulation. It's one thing to arouse
their attention, but it's a far different thing to get their
money. The mind may be willing, but the pocketbook
may be weak.
If you had the choice of a thousand acres Of desert
land or a hundred acres Of oasis, you'd select the fertile
spot, realizing that the larger tract had less value be-
cause it would be less productive.
The advertiser who really understands how he is
spending his money takes care that he is not pouring
his money into deserts and sewers.
(Copyrght)