The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1914-03-03
Observation-Disclosures.
TER IN CLASH BETWEEN
WE1DEBUsCH AND 0'KANE. :
THE GERMANS PUT ONE OVER
THE IRISH IN STRENUOUS
(Gharlcs brooks Smith. J.


souls!) were driven on with great
confusion and loss. This time by
the Dutch. Think Of that! The stol-
n, phlematic. stein-tippling, llumor-
less, fiddle-sawing Germans (albeit
first-rate folk and the best kind Of
americans, to my notion, and prosit
to them!) have put one over on the
Irish. The harp that hangs in Tiara's
halls is sure busted, Sbegorra,. Hoch
der Kaiser!
This is how IT was; The weide-
buches and the ,o'Kanes, fine Ameri-
can names arefthey, claslied up about
Wheeling, and the clash was over a
postoffiee. If there is anything that
can cause a clash that is a better
Clash than all other classes it is a
postoffice that needs to be filled with
a new postmaster. Tie Weidebusch.
Is and the jotKanes each carly decid-
fed that they wanted postoffice at
! $ y. -
Wheeling when Bob Hazlett gave. the
community a SHOCK by sresig6ing ana
not dying mot that anybody Wanted
Bob to die@not at all; but he rem
dered dear old axiom to the effect
that officeholders may sometimes die
Tut they never resign, null and void
thus destroying a landmark among
our notices Of politics. Asiaforesaid,
the. two eminent clans Of Democracy
rs designated above went to tor
for it-justias soon as news of'the va
cancy was bulletined in the 'Panhan-
die burg, and they made things live.
u right from the prologue to the last
curtain.
1t wasn't expected at the start
nobody possessed the prescience to
see what was coming-but before
matters had progressed very far tile
patriotic sons of Erin rallied to the
standard Of that forceful son Of the
House of o'Kane, yclept DR.. John j..
who ambitioned the job, while tho
cermania warblers, spider clubs and
pretzel prestidigitators, and all their
Filth and kin, rallied in the name OF
tile 2vaterland and Die Wacht am
Rhein to the banner Of Herr Angus
tus Weidebusch, who would have. been
a multi-millionaire II he had Anheu-
ser hung on his butch" '
Then and thereupon, my country
men,, there was something doing
which resembled somewhat a com
posite picture of meeting Of XIII
kcnney cats, gay day at thelDonny-
brook Fair,a rausemittems and a hey
rube all rolled up in one. 1t was
some scrimmage. believe me Kan
tippe. The Kincheloe clans came up
with banners flying and bagpipes
braying "The campbells are Com
ing" and the Wilson and Hughes
forces perched on the outskirts Of the
battle like yultures, but there was no
opening for any of them. 1t, was a
fight to the finish between the
oKanes and the Weidebusches.
Let us draw the curtain on this
sad scene1of carnage. The o'Kanes
were finally driven from the, field.
and the Weidebusches adjourned, to
yon convenient 3Hofbeau to celebrate
the victory with limitless ;leiders and
IN unstinted stems. Many a soldier
of the Legion fell in.that engage
nent that escaped the contact of a
swinging shillalah in the clash that
preceded. The Kincheloes, the Will
sons and the Hughes retired inglori-
ously from the scene. Forthem there
was nothin' doin'-positiyileye.
Congressman Nee1y-erstwhilc ma.
;or in the Observation-Disclosures
not only a witness, but an arbiter OF
this splendid battle. Battle Scared
as he was, Injured 10 the scenes Of
carnage and summer complaint which
afflicted our boys at Chicamauga
camp-the major was frank enough
70 admit that he never saw anything
Ike this conflict. 1t wrung his ten
der heart and paid tribute to the W.
tality of his remaining hairs by turn
ing them a Bryan-silver gray. Major
Nicely had read Of General Miles
pink-pajama invasion Of Porto Rico
where our boys died on by scores
from acute indigestion contracted at
the banquets given them by the joy
Gus and hospitable Porto Ricans, and
admitted that he had sen the picture
If Roosevelt at San Juan, = where
that intrepid collector Of South Amer:
lean botanical specimens leveled that
mound with hissabre with one swipe
to flat and Improbable praisie-
Major Nicely had read and seen all
of these bloodthirstily melodramatic
things and vet he was frank enough,