The Washington herald., 1914-06-26
Statesmen, Real and Near.
Nv FRED c. KELLY.

BY FHED y. kELi~Ls
A member Of President wilson's fam.
lily had occasion 10 buy trunk not Ions
ago, and when 1t was sent up to the
White House with the Initials neatly
stenciled on one end some one was re-
minded Of the story Of another piece OF
baggage that was sent to the White
HOUSE in another. Democratic administra-
ton.
The hero Of this trunk story was and
II Clarence L Cullen. who Is best known
today as a delightful writer Of short
stories and who has had about as many
experiences Of one kind and another
as any man alive. Cullen first broke Into
fame as the author OF a book called
Tales Of the Ex-Tanks." a'collection OF
hard luck stories. and most OF the ad-
ventures In the book had befallen him
personally, tits said. He probably holds
the worlds record for being broke in
more places In this country and all other
countries than anybody, and he also is
the undisputed champion for having held
more boy jobs and more different kinds
OF boy jobs-jobs with the emoluments
ranging from 81 to $3.50 a week-than any
human now sentient and breathing.
One Of these boy jobs that Cullen held
was in a Washington trunk store. He
"oo hNh gCdA5 "hCh nc dICCpleu
the position" and was anxious TO make
good. His employer was kind and pa
tient man up to the point at which an
employer must stop being that way, and
he spent three days teaching young Cul-
len how to stencil initials or names on
the sides Of trunks and suitcases.
On the morning OF the fourth day a
President of the United States entered
the store and bought himself a hand
some and expensive Gladstone bag. The
President OF the United States directed
that the initials "G. G." should be stem
ciled on the bag. after which It was to
be delivered TO the White House This
job Of stenciling fell TO Cullen.
Now little Cullen approved Of that
President. He liked him. In fact he felt
anectionate toward him. He thought that
President WIS just about all right. And
the more he reyolved the thing In his
mind the more he became convinced that
those mere initials &c. c." stenciled on
the travelling bag of so distinguished and
estimable a Chief Magistrate would have
a cold and unfeeling look. II would
seem curt and formal. What was need
ed. Cullen believed, was something that
would indicate tastily and at a glance
the real warmth O6 the feeling OF that
trunk establishment toward the distin-
gUished purchaser.
So with painstaking care he stenciIed
GROVER" on the bag-just that and
nothing more, giving much the same
jaunty effect as the name Elsie paint
ed on the bow OF a canoe. The bag was
sent then right up TO the White House
without the proprietor Of the trunk store
having a chance TO look at the stenciling
Obviously the bag came back. Ac-
companying IL were some written re-
marks-caustic remarks-signed Daniel
Lamont. who at that time was the Presi-
dents secretary. There then occurred
really remarkable synchronization be-
tween the return Of the bag from the
White House and Cullen's departure
from the trunk shop. The proprietor
looked rather confused and chagrined
when he saw the name on the bag. But
this confusion did not cause any muscular
paralysis on his part, as young Cullen
rapidly found out.
Thus are good intentions misconstrued.
Two men were riding in the observa-
tion car of a train between New York
and Philadelphia a while ago and
chanced to fall into conversation. They
discussed the state OF the vegetation
along the railroads right OF way ana
other topics and finally became friendly
enough TO inquire each others names
One said his name was Woodruff ana
that he hailed from Michigan. The
others name was Donovan, and his
home was in Connections.
What's your line?" asked Donovan
oh, I'm a member OF Congress" re-
piled Woodruff. And you"
I'm member Of Congress, too" said
Donovan.
Then each looked at the other for a
moment as II he thought he was looking
into the face Of a good offhand liar.
But each had told the truth. Both
are in Congress. but each had been so
busy with his duties that he had not
taken time TO study the faces Of his
mates.
We'll. I'm glad to haye met YOU" said
Donovan. when they separated: IF you
ever get over on my side Of the House
look me up
senator Isaac Stephenson. Of wiscon-
Sin' was eighty-five years old on June Is
On the morning of that day he picked
up list OF food supplies that the cooks
at his big lumber company's camps may
draw on. The list included: Evaporateo
apples. spices, baking powder. fresh beef
corn beef. beets, crackers, cabbage and
carrots in season, corn meal. herring
JellN. marmalade, mince meat. molasses
oat meal, onions. pickles, preserved figs,
raisins. pumpkin, bologna, tea. cocoa, to-
matoes. etc.
For some moments the Senator stared
at the list intently and then exclaimed:
People are all mollycOddIcs nowadavsII
Think Of having all that stun to eat in
a lumber camp"
Then he went on to talk Of his own
early days in the Wisconsin woods, Law
ing great stress on the fact that he fire.
qrently got along day after day on moth
ing hut pork and beans
And often. says the Senator, 81 took
the pork raw
Although he is greatly addicted to the
use OF food. Ollie James. OF Kentucky,
the largest Senator, eats rather sparingIv
at the noon hour. 4 ham sandwich. a
cup of coffee, and two doughnuts-those
his midday rations almost in
variably.
Copyright. 1914. by rred e Kelly. All right, r.
seTVed.l