The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1914-04-02
GERMAN RED TAPE
A Most Irritating Brand Is Used
In the PoStoffices.
SENDING A PARCEL BY MAIL.
Experience Of an English Tourist Who,
With Joyous Confidence, Undertook
to Perform What Was Supposed to
Be Perfectly Simple Operation.

Be Perfectly Simple Operation.
In all innocence and hghtness OF
heart | set out one morning 10 send a
small parcel TO England from the town
In Germany where | was staying. At
the poStotiice | was confronted by
| three booking office windows each
having weird and formidable inscrip-
tion over IT, These inscriptions were
not 70 be comprehended at glance;
SO, not wishing to gaEe up at them too
long, / selected the least crowded win
dow and handed over my parcel. Ii
was promptly returned TO me with Il
curt Go TO the next Window Ii
was Just that window | specially wish.
Ell TO avoid, being the most crowded,
but | waited my turn and then made
another attempt. The official looked
ut me sternly.
Have you the circularsY he asked
"No," replied family.
He handed me three circulars, for
which | had to pay q small sum and
which was requested to fia up. Pick
Ing up my parcel, | sat down to study
those circulars. They were covered
with Instructions, the language used
was magnificent, and the effect was
so overwhelming that found 1t din
cult to grasp what l was instructed
10 do. Ii my papers We're not filed up
accurately It was not from untruthful
ness, but owing TO my limited German
vocabulary
BY the time | had described the
parcel, the gross weight thereof I'm
grams and Kilograms, the gross
value thereof In marks and pfennigs
and given detailed description of
each article contained therein, with
Its separate weight and value, felt
like an old inhabitant of that postofice.
l had seen, as It We're, generation after
generation OF stamp purchasers come
and 60 and still l remained. As to
the weights, my idea of Kilograms
was about on par with my knowl
edge Of definite integrals. However, ]
did my best. | guessed at the prob
able weight Of the parcel and divided
the articles into It.
At length | came to the end, and.
feeling like candidate at an exam.
ination, | gathered up my papers and
the parcel and went over to the win.
dow. After waiting my turn handed
over the papers. The official glanced
at them, then at the parcel, and
frOwned.
Did you weigh the articlesP" he
asked sterny.
"Ya-a-aW | stammered.
"Then go home and weigh them
again, You have put them down at
half toni
There was no help for It. with a
sigh l gathered up my papers and
went back to secluded corner. After
patiently reducing all the weights
again presented the papers This time
they were passed, and | was sent on
to the next department, where had
to purchase and fill up another docu-
and this paper was soon dealt with.
Then, with my heart beating fast. !
handed over the parcel. 1t was once
more returned to me. The official said
he could not take 1t In that condition
it was insecurely made up.
Now, If there is one thing upon which
| pride myself 1t is upon the neat way
In which ! turn out a parcel. SO,
smothering my indignation as well as
| could assured him that 1t would
be all right, that 1t was perfectly safe
and that there was nothing I'm 1t which
was breakable. He repeated firmly
that 1t was Insecure and that he could
not take II. So | sadly collected my
papers and the parcel and went home
to dinner
l spent all the afternoon trying to
purchase cardboard box of exactly
the right proportions and some water
proof cloth to wrap round It, | next
procured stick of sealing wax and
German seal, and by the time | had
finished that parcel looked as II 1t
were prepared to travel to the north
pole.
1t was now getting toward evening,
and l was feeling wearied after my
days work, so besought my brother
IA willing, guileless youth-to take 1t
to the postOttice. He took II so inno-
Gently that my conscience reproached
me for not having given him word
of warning. He was long time gone,
but that was to be expected When
saw him come in my heart sank in
despair
They won't take 1t like this" he
said cheerfully.
groaned and asked:
why notY"
There's not enough sealing wax
on it."
mot enough sealing waxT | cried
incredulously
mo. You must put blob wherever
the string crosses and wherever there's
a knot"
In desperation | seized the sealing
wax and worked away until | had
used 1t to the last speck and the par
eel was one intricate mass of string
and wax. Then conveyed It once
more to the pOstoffice. 1t was now al
most closing time, and the officials
were in hurry to get away. | hand
ed over the papers and the parcel with
out a word.
the postof1ce with Joy in my heart and
a smile of satisfaction on my face. |
had sent the parcel ofr.-London Fami-
ly Herald.