The Harrison times., 1914-08-01

DO not mlStruSt the Iale, Tor every
Buccaneer from Broad Street, N, Y,
to the st, Francis Bar at the Golden
Gate, was once Poor Boy with Store
Clothes on his Back and Grand Lar
ceny in his Heart.
When Angie went to visit Lib after
the Lapse Of Many Years, you can
Gamble that they had Some Talk to
unload.
Angie carried a Wicker Suitcase
costing $19S and her General Get-Up
was that of the Honest Creature who
may be found in any Hotel Corridor at
2 A. M, massaging the Mosaic Floor
with Hot Cloth
Get mel" said Wilburs wife, drop
ping wearily to a Divan in the Style Of
Louie Quatorze. Pipe the Lid! II Is
a 1906 Model and the Aigrette Is made
Of Broom Straw. Take a Peek at the
shine Tailor-Made and the Paper
Shoes. Ever since they wished that
False Alarm on to me have been CIV
ing a correct Imitation OF Lizzie the
Honest Working Girl. Each Evening
he comes home to give me Sweet,
Kiss and promises me a Trip to Eu-
rope and a Set OF Gray Squirrels, and
next Morning, when / get up to re-
move the Oatmeal from the Fireless
Cooker, find on the Back Porch
large Roughneck in a Sweater who
has come to shut off the Gas or take
away the Parlor Furniture. Then |
think Of you, with your Closets hang
ing full of fluffy Frocks and your Fin
gers crowded with Jewels and your
Man rushing In every few Minutes to
slap you in the Face with a Hundred
Dollar Bill You can take 1t from me,
Dearie, would jump the whole Game,
were It not for the Children, have
put in my whole Life trying to realize
something on a Promlssory Note that
was Bloomer to begin with He has
kidded me along ever since the
Worlds Fair at Chicago, feeding me
on Canned stun and showing me pic
lures OF Electric Runabouts and Coun'
try Places on Long Island, In the
Meantime I am playing in Great Luck
II can get a Trolley Car to stop
for me-"
At this point the Wife OF Otis arose
and, pulling the rose.colored silk
Wrapper more closely about her made.
to.order Form, interrupted with an
Imperious Gesture,
Back up, Angje" she exclaimed,
you should be a Happy Woman, You
have your Husbands Love and you
have your children, both Of which are
denied q Woman Of my Assured POSI-.
tion In the Two Minute Class Of the
Terrible Spenders, Talk about Hard.
shlpsl DO you know what II Is to lead
the Grand March, surrounded by 500
Assegai.Throwers, Harpooners and
Cannibal Queens, who are pointing
you out as the wife OF the Malefaetor
who Is about to be Tried In the Fed.
eral Courts? Did you ever Staggor
around all Evening with 100000 worth
OF Tiffany Merchandise fastened on
to you-expeotlng every Minute to be
hit In the Coiffure by some Rallies?
Did you ever during Formal Dinner,
hear the Door Bell tlnkle and find In
the Hallway Reporter from u Morn.
ing Paper who wishes to ask your
Husband II he denies his Guilt or can
give any Reason why Sentence Of
Death should not bo passed upon him?
Arc you Wise TO the Fact that the
Wife OF Successful Business Man
now occupies Niche in the Hall OF
Fame right next TO the Sister OF Jesse
James2 You are IN Great Luck, No
ono takes q Shot at Failure"
Having arrived at this cordial Tn,
derstanding each leaned against the
other and had a Good Cry after which
thoy ohrked up and paid lot Of at'
tontlon TO woll'proaoryod Bachelor
who dropped in to get warm and tske
q slight Fall out Of the side'Doard,
MORAL When Wealth walks In at
the Door, the Press Agent comes In
tbraVak tbn Nfindaay