Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1914-09-25
DIDN'T WORK WELL
Experiment in Altruism Might
Have Been All Right But
for the Circumstances.

When Danvers and his friend Bar.
low came into the car Danvew was
talking.
81 have come to the conclusion" he
said, that the only Christian way for
people to get about in these crowded
cars is to stand up in relays. 1t looks
hoggish for one set Of passengers to
occupy all the seats all the time. There
ought to be general shaking up every
five minutes and give the strapholders
chance to rest"
ut wouldn't work." said Barlow. 1T
would turn out like every other altruis.
tic scheme. Some generous souls would
be giving up their seats all the time
and others would be sitting still all the
time. waiting for somebody else to do
his duty. And besides, nobody would
have nerve enough to qualify his offer
with the five minutes conditional
clause"
Il would" said Danvers, land the
first chance l get am going to test
the scheme and see how 1t works"
He found q chance before he got
home. Somewhere in the shopping dis
trict two women came into the car.
One of them sat down beside Danvers;
the other, finding no vacant seat, stood
in front Of him. Barlow nudged him
maliciously. Now is your oppor-
tunity," he whispered.
Danvers sat still for few minutes,
watching the woman's swaying, lurch-
ing figure. Presently he said:
Madam, I will give you this seat
and let you rest awhile il you will
promise to give 1t back to me at the
end of five minutes"
The woman lunged helplessly into
Danvers' lap.
Il beg your pardon" she said. THAT
sudden turn-oh, yes; I'm all right
now, thanks. What was 1t you said
about five minutes?" -
Danvers repeated his offer.
THAT is very kind Of you, am
sure" she said, but ! feel that l
ought not take the seat. II you are i'll
and think you won't feel like standing
more than five minutes at time, per-
haps you had better sit STILL"
Danvers blushed. II feel we'll
enough" he said, "but 1t Is convic-
ton OF mine that no one who rides in
street cars ought to be obliged to
stand longer than five minutes at a
stretch. Are you willing to accept this
seat. under those conditions?"
Certainly" said the woman. "You
are very thoughtful to offer 1t at all.
What time is 1t now, please?"
Il haven't got my watch" Danvers
replied. as he clutched the dangling
strap, "but it doesn't matter. 1t will
take US just five minutes to get from
here to the city hall. I'll keep an eye
open for that. When we get there
will let yov know and you can give
me show again. '~
VERY WE'LL" said the woman, and
she resumed the interrupted converse
ton with her companion.
At Thirteenth street there was a
blockade. BY the public clocks In the
neighborhood 1t lasted just 20 minutes.
At the end Of five minutes Danvers be-
gan to fidget. At the end Of ten min.
utes his impotence became audible.
"Ah-m-m-m," he said. "Confounded.
ly long wait, this"
The woman checked her flow OF
speech.
Have we got to the city hall YETI?
she asked, innocently.
ITO the city hall?" said Danvers
Great heavens, we haven't budged an
| inch for ten minutes. How on earth
did you expect US to get to the city
hall?"
Dear me-" said the woman, how
provoking. These blockades do delay
one so. When we get there let me
know, please, il I don't happen to no
tice it myself. promised, you remem
Der, to let you sit down again when we
got to the city hail."
Barlow snickered. Eyes, l remem
ber." said Danvers. a
Thirteen minutes later they reached
i
the city hall.
Madam" said Danvers. ?,
"Ah, here we are" said the woman.
She arose and Danvers sat down.
Madam" he said, "you seemed to
forget that there were two strings to
our agreement, one relating to time
the other to place. You disregarded the
first. You kept me standing some
thing like twenty-five minutes. I shall
be equally inconsiderate. shall not
relinquish this seat at the end Of five
| minutes"
ooh, that's all right" said the WON.
an. 81 get off at Fifteenth street, any
way"
What did l tell you?" said Barlow,
II told you you would get the worst
Of the bargain"
Il hadn't counted on blockades,'
said Danvers YEARLY. 1.-THE next time
I'll take care not to mention particular
corners, also not to make bargain OF
any kind with woman" . i r