Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1914-03-25

her delicate features with the coarse.
knowing face of the woman at the Ia
ble's foot and inwardly answered No"
without the genial complement OF
talk the dinner began. Mr.. Peters ap-
peared with another variety OF hts can
ned soup, whereupon the silence was
broken by the gastronomic endeavors
of Mr.. Max and the mayor. Mr.. Ma
gee was rejecting that converse ton
must be encouraged, when Cargan sud
denly spoke.
IT hope I amt putting you folks out
none" he remarked. with obvious sar-
casm. 1T amt my habit to drop In
unexpected like this. But business
We're delighted. I'm sure" said Mr..
Magee politely.
II suppose you want to know why
I'm here" the mayor went on. Well
he hesitnted-''it's like this
Dear Mr.. Cargan." Magee broke in.
spare us. 1 pray, and spare yourself.
| We have had explanations until we
are weary. We have decided TO drop
them altogether and just to take 1t for
granted that. in the words of the song.
we're here because we're here"
"All right" replied Cargan. evidently
relieved. That suits me. I'm tired
explaining anyhow There's bunch
OF reformers rose up lately In Reuton.
Maybe you've heard about 'em. A
! lovely bunch. A white necktie and
half portion of brains apiece TheI
say they're going to do for me at the
next election"
/ Mr.. Max laughed hersn!y from the
vicinity of his soup.
.sT1 ha arSf in4o h0.lE
them people" he said.
Well" went on Cargan. there amt
nobody so insignificant and piffiing that
people won't listen to 'em when they
attack a man in public life. So I've
had to reply to this comic opera bunch.
and. as i say. I'm about wore out ex-
planning I've had to explain that l
never stole the town / used to live in
in Indiana and that l didn't stick up
nv father with a knife. 1t gets mo-
notonous. So I'm much obliged to you
for passing the explanations up. We
won't bother you long. me and Lou.
got little business here. and then
Wen mosey along. Well clear out
about o'clock
No protested Magee. $50 soon?
We must make II pleasant for you
while you stay. ] always hate hosts
who talk about their servants. l have
friend who bores me to death be-
carsa be has a Jap butler he believes
was at Mukden. But l think l am
justified in calling your attention 10
ours. Mr. Peters. the hermit OF Bald
pate mountain. Cooking is merely his
nvocation. He is writing a book
THAT guy:" remarked Cargan. in
credulous.
What do you know about thatT'
asked Mr.. Bland. at certainly will I
get lot OF hot advertising If it ever /
appears. It's meant TO prove that ali 4
the trouble in the world has been caus- |
ed by woman"
The mayor considered.
Hes nn-he's nu.ty. that fellow"
he announced 1T amt women that 1
cause all OF the trouble"
"Ahem-Mr. CarGaD." put in Profes-
sor Bolton You give it as your opin-
ion that woman is no trouble maker.
and I musG admit that | agree with
your premise in general. although &C.
casionally she may cause "a slight
annoyance. Undeniably. there is lot
of trouble in the world. To whose eff
forts do you ascribe IT."
Inc ldh lHlCh
through hss hair.
81 got you" be SAID. land I got your
answer too. Who makes the trouble?
Who's mnde it from the beginning of
time? The reformers. Doc. Yes. sir.
Who was the first reformer: The
snake in the garden or Eden. This
hermit guy probably has that affair
laid down nr womap's door. Not much.
Everything was running all right
around the garden, and then the snake
came along It's "A twenty 10 one shot
he'd just finished a series OF articles
on The Shame OF Eden for maya
zine What dye mean?' he says to
the woman. by letting well enough
alone: Things are all wrong here
The present administration is running
everything into the ground. 1 can tell
you few things that will open your
eyes. What's that? What you don't
know won't hurt you? The old cry
be says, the old cry against which pro-
sressives got TO fight he says. Wake
up. You need a change here. Try this
nice red apple, and you'll see things
The way do And the woman fell for
It. You know what happened"
An original point OF view" said the
1azed professor.
Yes. Doc" went on Mr.. Cargan.
evidently on a favorite topic; Its
he reformers that have caused all the
.rouble. from that snake down. Things
ire running smooth, folks all prosper
BUS and satisfied. then they come along
n their gum shoes and white neckties.
And they knock away at the existing
,rder until the public begins to be-
ieve 'em and gives 'em a chance TO
.un things. What's the result? The
worlds In worse tangle than ever
before"
You feel deeply on the subject, Mr.
Cargan." remarked Magee.
Il ought to-" the mayor replied. 81
lint no writer. but IL / was I'd turn
tut book that would drive this whis.
Tered hermit's argument to the wall.
The only way women
make trouble is by falling for the re-
orm gag"
NJ