Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1914-11-20
DR.. Marden's
Uplift Talks
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BY oRISoN SWEET MARDEN.
GETTING OVER YOUR SENSITIVE
NESS.
Copyright by Mcclure Newspaper Syndicate

| know a bright, well-tra!ned young
lady, whose intimate friends, and even
her near relatives, have to be continu
ally on the watch for fear of wound
ing her. She troods over joking re-
mark until she magnifies it into an in
suit. She makes herself miserable for
days over a fancied slight and ex-
hausts the patience of her friends by
asking them to explain what they
meant by certain expressions, looks or
gestures. People who are at first at
tracted by her many amiable quail
ties soon fall away from her because
or the exactions imposed by her over
sensitiveness
Over-sensitiveneSs is really an eX-
aggerated form of self-consciousness
1t is far removed from conceit or self
esteem, yet it causes ones own per-
sonality to overshadow everything
else. A sensitive person feels that,
whatever she does, wherever she goes
or Whatever she says, she is the center
OF conversation. She imagineS that
people are criticizing her movements,
making fun at her expense or analyz-
ing her character, when they are
probably not thinking of her at all.
She does not realize that other people
are too busy and too much interested
IN themselves and in other things to
devote to her any of their time beyond
what is absolutely necessary When
she thinks they are making remarks
about her, putting sights upon her,
or trying to hold her up to the ridi-
cule of others, they may not even be
conscious of her presence.
Thousands of young women are
held back from undertaking what
they long to do, and are kept from
trying to make real their life-dreams,
because they are afraid to jostle with
the world. They shrink from ex-
posing their sore and sensitive spots,
which smart from the slightest touch.
Their supersensitiveness makes COW
ards of them.
The great majority of people. no
matter how rough in manner or bear
ing, are kind-hearted, and would
much rather help than hinder fellow
beings; besides, they have all they
can do to attend to their own affairs,
and have no time to spend in min
utely analyZing the nature and feel
ings of those whom they meet in
the course of their daily business. In
the busy world of affairs it is give
and take, touch and go, and those
who expect to get on must rid them
selves of all morbid constituencies.
If they do not, they doom themselves
to unhappiness and failure.
A college course is of inestimable
value to girl of over-refned sensi-
bilities. Oftentimes when girls enter
college, they are so touchy that their
sense of honor is constantly being
hurt and their pride stung by the
unconscious thrusts of classmates
and companions. But after they have
been in college a term, and have
been rubbing up against other girls,
they realize that it would be the
most foolish thing in the world to
betray resentment. Ii one shows that
she is hurt she knows she will be I'M
popular and will often be laughed
at. She is simply forced to drop the
foolish weakness. sGirls who are NOR
bidly sensitive on entering college,
often come out at the end of their
four years course with their exces-
sive irritability cured by repeated
doses of common sense.
There are many however, who must
go through life without going through
| college: and if these are troubled with
constituencies, they must be their own
healers. They must learn that real
nobility and courage and effectiveness
as a world-worker, as well as per-
sonal happiness and success, are inn
possible to one who is crippled by
supersensitive nature.
What shall | do to get rid of it,"
a girl asks. Think less of yourself
and more of others. Mingle freely
with the people. Become interested
in things outside of yourself. Do not
brood over what is said to you or
analyze every simple remark until you
magnify it into something of the
greatest Importance. Do not have
such a low and unjust estimate of
people as to think they are bent on
nothing but hurting the feelings OF
others, and deprecating and making
light of them on every possible occa-
sion. A girl who appreciates herself
at her true value, and who gives her
neighbors credit for being at least as
good as she is, will not be the victim
of oversensitiveness.