New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1914-07-26
THE TALK OF THE DAY.

Obscrvant visitors 20 the menagerie in Central
Park note with amusement sign of the
buildings. 1t is the official home of the Park De-
partment, and also the police station. On door
nearest the police end of the building is notice,
"No admttance" "If such signs going up on
tho police stations" said a visitor last Sunday, "I'm
going to leave my cash home and carry check book
DISPATCHES from the Southwest continually de-
monstrate that collding with sherif's posse is one
of the most fatal occupations in that region.-Chi-
cago News
Bulls do not keep the farm in Ireland. Some
wande- around the house. The other day small
Harlem girl demonstrated how bull could be made.
They were having ice cream at her house, and her
small brother, having eaten his share, asked:
Mamma have you any more cream outside"
The little girl replied: "Of course not! If there
was any ice cream outside I'd have it in here"
The more one reads about prize fighting in France
the stronger becomes the belief that 1t is strictly
ladylike amusement-Cleveland Plain Dealer
Whether a boys ears belong to his face or his
neck has always been a matter Of washing con-
venience to the boy. One of two boys street
car evidently had been told to wash his face for his
companion remrked: you're all dirty back of your
ears"
Jaw, amt either" demonstrated the accused
"Well, you don't have to believe me- said the
other you just look and see"
"Can the contortions" growed the conductor and
the boys became quiet as boys can be.
Helen-Why I never could marry that man!
Hazel-Mercy! Why not?
Helen-Why, he wears wig!
And then the dear creature took of rat, some
puffs, a coronet, a braid, pompadour and switcn,
and sat down to peruse nOvel-lllinois Siren.
Long rides, two kids for cent" This novel
sign is painted in big yellow letters on the side
of an ancient express wagon, drawn by somewhat
ancient horse the East Side. The wagon has broad
seats along the side and the crowd Of kddies who
daily patronizc it on its frequent trips around the
block shows its popularity.
Waiter-What shall it be, sir, table dhote or a la
carte? -
em.-Philadelphia Ledger
white Pomeranian escaped from the arms Of its
mistress in Surf av., Coney Island the other night
and ran in front Of automobile. A newsboy
darted after the dog caught it, and then fell IN
mud puddle. He lost dozen or so OF papers but
held on to the dog which he returned to its owner
slightly soiled.
you impudent little scamp" said the woman
What made you get the dear little dog so dirty?
You ought TO be whipped"
81 am mighty glad didn't your life replied
the boy and score of onlookers applauded him.
Cages for wild animals have been abolished at
the London Zoo Visitors, accustomed to seeing the
militants at large, manifest no alarm-Washington
Herald.
Fire Chief John Kenlon had rather novel expert
ence in reaching early morning blaze recently.
When four alarms were sounded for fire at a
yacht and engine plant at Morris Heights, IN Inc
Bronx the chief hoped into his red automobile and
started for the northern borough. At Lenox av.
and l27th st. the engine event dead" This didn't
stop the chief for he to the nearest l. station
and rode to the vaduct at Eighth av. and l5oth ST.
where ne sped private touring car After waxing
I'D the chauffeur and flashing his badge he jumped
in and was whsked up Sedgwick av, as he said
later, hitting only the high spots, until he reached
the fire The chauffeur admitted it was the fastest
cp he had ever driven and added that his speedom-
eter must have thought it its birthday.
Margaret-How does your friend Mrs Brown
stand on the suffrage question?
Anna-She's doing picket duty
Margeret-Doing picket duty-what, for suffrage !!
Anna Oh no; she's the fence -'Congregatlon-
alist.