Connecticut western news., 1914-09-24
The Wurra Wurra Club

The night was dark (yes. that's the way to begin it. The night wns so black in fact that even Joe Parsons didn't need his beard. The blackness of the night was so vast, so all encom- passing, so ubiquitous that light was nowhere to be seen. It gave the lie to the statement that the sun never sets I-of course she sets, she set that night; behold the brood-the brooding dark ness. The world was naught but oblivion. So oblivious was that oblivion that one felt himself to be but naught Ia naught in the naughtiness of the world. The naughtiness of the world 'ye, there's the rubl The darkness of that night was naught to the naughti- ness of the world, and yet 'tis true; the naughtness of the world was naught to the oblivion of that night. For there is no oblivion quite so oblivious as that in which the Wurra Wurra Club aint. What the Wurra Wurra Club ain't? Aye, 'tis true the Wurra Wurra Club was not to be on that night so full of solemn omen and portent. Why should not the night be dark, when the very stars in the heavens turned off their switches, or took them off, or at any rate prepared for such night as'this. For not since the idea of the Club was conceived in the brain of a man, not since it leaped one of oblivion onto the shores of time as Venus leaped from the head of Zeus which cured him of his headache. The solemn truth had silently spread itself on the village like pale, it had gone from hand to mouth but naught could keep the members in their homes that night. The strange mysterious spell of the wanderlust was upon them l They heard the voices of Syllie and i Chrybdis (members of the chorus) call ing them and they sail ed forth trembl- ing with manly excitement, excited as they trembled upon the brink of some new disclosure of the abyss of oblivion into which had sunk for the time be- ing the Wurra Wurra Club. The sound of the shuffiing of many feet was heard upon the street. The solemn voice of Judge Ford was heard issuing from the bunch:
 "What moots this desuetude?"
 ''This what ?'' said Seneca.
 'tThis solemn. nothing doing" said the Judge
 Wherefore is the club ain't to- night?" # '~# ....
 "Wherefore?" queried Seneca, as he moved along up the street and his answer shed no light upon the darkness. The familiar voice of the fat member was heard issuing from the recesses of Parsons steps. -#.s.. . l "What I want ,t' know is why ain't they no club tonight P 7.
 Why, said George Trieschmann, because the press agent is having a vacation. I" F. .l ...
 Whats that got t do with it, I'd like to know ?'' ...
 There's no use in having the club without the press agent, is there ?''-
 "Waal now, don't know bout that. Who's g blamed anxious t see their name in the papers all that? know I cd git long without him. Every dunn thin say up there he gifts into his newspaper and then my woman she jumps me, n says made fool O my self. No sir, I don't see no need O. givin' up the club jest fur that. Any how 1 thought the preacher wuz going to be press agent this week.
 '1But who wants a preacher to be press agent ?" said Charlie Butcher. | "I believe in preachers sticking to their lasts.'' "To their texts, guess you mean," said Deacon Stevens, Don't you know | that it's texts preachers stick to ?"
 "Not always,p said Charlie Any how all he could do would be to crib Johns style and he couldn't get by with it.. -r.
 But what want t' know'', said the fat member ,"is why we can't have press agent all O our own. lawns the press agent for the Bald Head Club of Americy an he's booming that the hull time. Why don't he never boom our club. Why don't he never try t' git members fur our club from way out in Mizoury or Arkinsaw? Why don't he make our club the Wurry Wurry Club of Americy? Anyhow we orter of had a club meetin' t'night fur I had speech all ready agin' putin a sewer up to Peaseville am hate orful to gin up maxim it."
 "HWell' said Deacon Stevens, "I guess its just as we'll there wasn't any, for that's an important matter I'm going home."
 |" IN so be I; but gee how dew dread it. My wife, she'll say, What didn't have no club jest 'cuz your press agent was havin' vacation Pretty kind of club that is. You'd better jine the suffragetts,' an guess we better had C'me on, Charlie"
 Lima, Peru has woman suffrage |