Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1914-09-20

met friend of his who is an army
officer
The Germans" said the Observer.
seriously, certainly seem to have put
the eternal kibosh on the allies"
The officer winked, deliberately and
knowingly.
why that wink?" rasped the OBJ
server. "I have consulted eminent au-
thorities and they have sustained every
one of my contentious"
81 know" replied the officer sympa-
thetically. You have consulted the
corner policeman and waiter who
once served in the landsturm and two
or three garrulous old ladies who did
Europe with Cooks tour back in 1889.
Then you put your giant intellect to
work, piecing this information to suit
your theories. Hence you are great
authority"
"Oh, no." objected the Observer.
"Oh, yes," sneered the army officer.
All right" replied the Observer mag
unanimously.
"is this. Gen. Joffre with Sir John
French are executing a wonderful re-
treat
you bet they are" agreed the OBJ
server emphatically.
The army officer smiled pityingly.
Naturally, he continued, you do
not know that a retreat. in good order.
is most difficult military movement.
believe that the French and allies are
leading the Germans on
And they are going to lead them
into Paris and give them the freedom
of the city and pay them an idemnity?''
asked the Observer. rs that your no.
ton of military strategy"
No." said the officer. They are
going to get them on a field Of their
own selection. Then you will Zee an
offensive movement that will make
your hair curl"
The Observer merely grinned again.
so confident was he.
There was the old Judge, formerly an
officer in the Confederate army. He
said much the same thing.
Don't be too certain" he warned.
IT know what I'm talking about"
replied the Observer, thinking of his
liverwurst.
There was the delicatessen dealer.
"Shurre," said the delicatessen deal
er. "An' Oh do not see how We come to
be an Expert, me bhoy."
The Observer was all ready for him
whose name is Keefe and who has
the nerve to run German de1icatessen
store is bound to get all balled up on
his strategy"
Meype ne uoeS, SalQ the uealer COM
placently but he doesn't go out and
advertise his ignorance"
So it went until a few days ago. The
Observer, unconscious of what he was
storing up for himself, kept on his
foolish way.
On the morning of the first German
reverse the Observer read his paper
in a dazed sort of way. Could it be
that the combined strategy of the Ger
mans and the Observer had awaited
nothing? This was terrible. unbelieya-
BILE. What of the shortage in liver
wurst?
Whenever one is particularly desir-
Gus of missing certain people they
are the people he will bang into first.
Go looking for anybody and you won't
find him for a month of Sundays, But
try to avoid him and he will hunt you
down every time. So much for the in
consistancies of fate.
The Observer got on a street car. A
familiar voice sounded in his ear. He
turned and found ,the army officer
at his side.
DO you think the Boston Braves will
win the National League pennantg'
asked the Observer with his false
heartiness.
The army officer ignored this pitiful
effort at evasion.
How is the worlds greatest little
military strategist this morning." he
asked benignly.
GU nave Deen readlnS the papers,
accused the Observer.
You bet 1 have" grinned the army
officer.
Well, bring on the fiery furnace"
said the Observer in resigned tones.
Il just wanted to remind you," SAID
the army officer, gently. that I TOLD
you So"
The Observer looked the army Officer
coldly in the eye.
You what?" he said.
II told you So" repeated the army
officer, and stepped Off the car.
The Observer stepped off the car q
few blocks further on. Just his luck
There, on the street corner, whiskers
paper and all with the eager gaze Of
| a prowling tiger, was the Judge.
Good morning" said the Observer
| hastily, and would have gone on. HI
had a fine chance of going on! The