The Lakeland evening telegram. (Lakeland, Fla.) 1911-1922, 1914-12-11
eRIMMlck's OYSTERS
BY JULIA CHANDLER

could scarcely raise a flicker of in
terest by relating how Albert Mac
Shane, who had moved to Texas. was
going to ship him some gulf oysters
during the winter.
They're oysters that are oysters!"
Grimmick always added. None of
your measly little eastern things. but
big, fat ones, the size Of saucer.
And flavor! Say, IL you haven't ever
eaten a gulf oyster you don't know
what you're talking about! They"
Let's 60 and get something cold to
drink" the person to whom Grimmick
was talking would interject about here.
taking of his Panama hat to mop his
steaming forehead.
Later in the fall people began to be-
tray an interest in Grimmick's oysters.
They listened and they heard SO much
about those glorified bivalves that most
of them would have recognized the
barrel on sight. No matter how dis
guised, it would have been impossible
for that barrel to deceive the eyes Of
Grimmick's friends. Persons of deep
designs brought Grimmick new recipes
for cooking oysters and artfully
showed him their wholehearted disin-
terestedness. Not that they expected
to get any of the oysters. but natural
ly they took a neighborly interest. 1t
might be big barrel.
Even Grimmick when he first gazed
upon it was trifle appalled, at the
size of the barrel. MacShane must
have misunderstood and sent him a
young hogshead. Or else the crop Of
gulf oysters was unusually large.
"Beauties!" cried Grimmick when
he got the barrel open. Il can scarce
ly wait to get at them"
The Grimmick family had raw oys-
tiers and oysters grilled that night for
dinner and all next day Grimmick
made a nuisance of himself telling
every one how good they were. He
issued no general invitations, how
ever, for people to run in and take
home a pailful of the gulf treasures.
Consequently, comments were bitter
on his trail.
Selfish brute!" was the universal
opinion. IT'S as bad as though he
owned an automobile and never took
any one out for a ride!"
1t really is amazing how far oysters
will go. After the Grimmicks had en-.
joyed oysters stewed, scalloped,
PANIED and fried to their hearts con-
tent they saw no appreciate shrink
ing Of the barrels contents. There
were just about as many oysters as
before
Grimmick said he thought he'd take
some down to the office for his part
ner. Mrs. Grimmick said that as
she was going over to Sister Nells'
that day she might as well take some
along. The next day she carried some
across to the neighbors on either side
Of them. That evening Grimmick sur
veyed the scalloped oysters set before
him and frowned slightly. He said
they looked fine, but he believed IL
Mary would fry him some of the
breakfast bacon he'd rather have it.
The following morning he said he
thought 1t was mistake not to share
their good fortune with their friends
and that he would speak to Beekman
and bundle and Buckle on the train
and tell them to stop by that night
on their way home and get some.
The weather turned warm just then.
ITS shame to waste those oysters"
Grimmick said when he saw the mer-
curry in the outside thermometer
standing at 4S degrees. Il should
think you would remember some of
your friends to whom gulf oysters
would be real treat"
"W'hy. have been giving them
around" confessed Mrs. Grimmick.
Somehow. that barrels terrible hard
TO empty"
In another week Grimmick was ped.
ding oysters frantically. The neigh
bors' dogs feasted on them and all
the cats for blocks about congregated
daily on Grimmick's back steps be-
cause the cook fed them freely on
oysters. Presently whenever Grim.
mick hove in sight the men would
raise protesting hands and say they
were obliged, but they did not want
any oysters.
Mrs. Grimmick, five minutes after
taking quart or so over to the next
door neighbor. saw the maid march
out to the garbage can and empty out
the gift. 1t then dawned on her that
1t was the fifth time in a week she
had bestowed oysters on that family.
Still, she felt irritated Further. the
mere sight of the barrel irritated her.
for good many oysters remained.
Rather fearfully, she served oysters
that night at dinner 1t was the third
time that week Grimmick exploded
and arose from his chair and beat his
INST upon the table. He gave orders that
II he lived to be one hundred and ten
she was never under any conditions to
place oysters upon his table again.
Then. calling for the spade and an ak.
ne proceeded to the back yard. After
excavating a large hole he buried the
rest or the oysters and chopped up
the barrel for kindling.
There Grimmick said exultinsly
as ne Stalked into the house "Cat