davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The fool-killer. (Moravian Falls, N.C.) 1910-1917, 1914-04-01
BACON AND BOOZE

Of all the far-fetched and in
fernal arguments that were ev
er hatched up by the bug-house
brain Of blubbering booze
artist, here is one that caps the
stack.
The editor of local paper, in
adding his mite to the discus
sion of the high cost Of living,
drags in the startling statement
that the prohibition law in North
Carolina is responsible for the
high cost Of meat.
Shades of dad s old SOW! What
a clincher! Now we have it
straight from the foundation
head Of wisdom, and the ques-
tion is settled. It must be a
Thrilling sensation to be smart
like that.
Several years ago, when gov
ernment distilleries were as
thick throughout North Carolina
as fleas on a yaller dog, it was
the custom to fatten hogs on
still-slop.' The stiller built d
hog-lot adjoining his booze fac.
tory and all the neighbors
brought their hogs there to be
fattened on the q slop'' which
ran into the lot through grea1
nasty troughs. The farmers solo
their corn to the distiller an(
took their pay in likker for them
selves and "slop" for their hogs
And they thought they were get
ting a great bargain.
But now the stills have beel
driven out and the rivers 0
still-slop" have ceased to flow
and that is the reason the peopl
can t raise hogs any more-be
cause there is no still-slop to fat
ten 'em on.
,, Great argument! Profoun
| reasoning Of course no one eve
thought Of feeding corn to hogs
But why couldn t it be done
. Why Wouldn t bushel Of cor
, do pig more good than just tn
slop that bushel Of corn woul
, make? Do the four-legged hog
fare better on just the dregs Q
the corn after the "drunk" ha
been extracted for the two legge
hogs? That seems to be the wa
, our wise editor looks at it. Bu
he is so Internal cross-eyed tha
if he should cry the tears ~woul
/ run down the back Of his necl
The prohibition law respons
bic for the high price Of meat
. Why, you might as we'll argu
that the mud between a. litt]
niger toes is responsible fo
the changes of the moon.
The fool-killer. (Moravian Falls, N.C.) 1910-1917, 1914-04-01
Result of Ore Smile.

One smile makes a filtration.
One filtration makes two ac-
quainted. Two acquainted make
one kiss. One kiss makes several
more. Several kisses make an en-
gagement One engagement
makes two fools. Two fools make
one marriage. One marriage
makes two mothers in-laW. Two
mothers-in law make red-hot
time.
The fool-killer. (Moravian Falls, N.C.) 1910-1917, 1914-04-01

Now, boys, as a parting word,
| ask you to show this paper to
all your neighbors and friends
and get them to subscribe. will
strive to make The Fool Killer
better and better each month.
In next issue there will be some
juice that will pucker the devils
mouth to beat sixty.
The Ward County independent. [volume] (Minot, Ward County, N.D.) 1902-1965, 1914-11-26

This is too bad. From a Chicago
daily we clip this discouraging item;
More than 100000 members of the
Presbyterian church in the United
States have been placed on the "sus-
pended" roll within the last five years
according to the report Of the Rev
William Fulton to the general assem-
bly, committee. He gives as the cause
"the growing love of pleasure; disre-
gard for the Lords day and the word
of God; the increasing craze for am
easements and the influence Of worldly
company" But we hope sister churches
will not point the finger. Methodists
and Baptists, Lutherans and Congoes
are open to the same criticism. The
apostles are dead. The millennium has
not arrived. g.. .. 60.
The Ward County independent. [volume] (Minot, Ward County, N.D.) 1902-1965, 1914-11-26

Dear old Horace Greedy visited
Minnesota many years ago, but he
did not think much of the state be-
cause at the time no apples were
grown there. Since the time of old
Horace, not only good apples are
crown in Minnesota, but now comes
forth a man who has successfully
grown one variety of peaches. The
chief trouble with growing peaches
in Minnesota, the horticulturists says
is that the warm spring winds shrive]
up the branches before the sap starts
He has remedied that by protecting
the trees from the wind and sun. Well
grow peaches in North Dakota soon.
The Ward County independent. [volume] (Minot, Ward County, N.D.) 1902-1965, 1914-11-26

The four members of the legisla-
ture from this district, C. A. Grow,
A. M. Thompson, B. A. Dickinson and
J. w. Smith, together with Senator w.
R. Bond, will make an excellent work
ing team at Bismarck. They will not
only work for the best interests of the
state in general, but their constitu-
ents in particular, and we feel sure
that they will gladly listen to any sug-
gestions and give them proper consid-
Grafton.
The Ward County independent. [volume] (Minot, Ward County, N.D.) 1902-1965, 1914-11-26

Just now, the various candidates for
sneaker of the house are marshalling
their forces and tits we'll for the legis-
lature convenes early in January. One
of the most likely candidates is A. M
Thompson, one of the members from
this district. Mr.. Thompson was a
member of the last legislature and he
gained valuable experience. That he
is well fitted for the important posi-
ton is generally conceded. He was a
candidate for the position two years
ago and displayed great deal of
strength. From what we can learn,
he has an excellent chance of landing
the place this year, and his many
friends hope that he will.
The Ward County independent. [volume] (Minot, Ward County, N.D.) 1902-1965, 1914-11-26

A post morten usually does no good,
but several of them were held in Mi
not Saturday morning when it was
learned that Morgan Rhoades, who
shot dead Griffen Skinner, another ne
gro, had been cleared by the jury. Ad-
hitting that Skinner was bad "nig-
ger" and threatened to kill Rhoades
the colored slayer should have notified
the authorities. Rhoades went a.
cunning for Skinner and his pals. He
found Skinner eating his supper in
Oser Webb's restaurant, and called tc
him to throw up his hands, then shot
the fellow dead, not giving him the
slightest chance for his life. It is
hard to see how any jury could b
convinced that Rhoades had acted ir
self-defense, altho the attorney fol
the defense displayed some rare ora.
tory. It's only one coon killing an.
other, still we wonder whether white
man could have gotten away with il
under like circumstances.
The Ward County independent. [volume] (Minot, Ward County, N.D.) 1902-1965, 1914-11-26

We notice the Chicago board Of ed
ucation are determined to suppress Sc
cret societies in the high schools, and
there are twenty-five in the city.
Much kicking, but boys at that age
have enough to do with their regular
studies. These outside affairs take
their time and energy, foster spirit
of clique, out of no earthly advantage.
Time enough at college and even then
some excellent men get along without
them.
The Ward County independent. [volume] (Minot, Ward County, N.D.) 1902-1965, 1914-11-26

No less than five hundred by actual
count were skating on the river Sun
day. The ice is nice and smooth and
in places thick enough to hold an ad-
ult, but there are so many openings
in the river. Strange, but there was
MT an accident. The river will claim
it's toll though. 1t does every winter
Some poor mother will mourn her son.
It's well to keep the boys off the ice
till it's strong enough and even then
there are dangers a-plenty.
The Ward County independent. [volume] (Minot, Ward County, N.D.) 1902-1965, 1914-11-26

That man Ford who makes automo-
biles simply can't get rid of his money
as fast as he makes it. His balance
sheet for the year ending Sept. 80
shows assets of SOL $4,000 and a sur
plus, of $4s,S27, 900, practically double
the totals for the year before. His
cash in hand and in banks is $27,441,
46s, against $13,225,000 the year be-
fore. His proft-sharing plan didn't
help him much; he is richer than ever
Elk.
The Ward County independent. [volume] (Minot, Ward County, N.D.) 1902-1965, 1914-11-26

1t doesn't pay to criticise the su-
preme court too severely. We may
differ with that body and say so, give
our reasons and fear no danger. But
to publish anything of an editorial ma
ture with view to influencing a decis.
ion, no sane newspaper man will dc
unless he is counting trouble and de.
sires to be taken before that august
body and asked to explain. It's fair.
ly easy matter for newspaperman to
he found guilty of contempt. It pays
to put on the soft pedal when dealing
with our supreme court.
The Ward County independent. [volume] (Minot, Ward County, N.D.) 1902-1965, 1914-11-26
Mince pies are coming to the from

Mince pies are coming to the front.
1t is their open season. No law
against destroying as many of the
specimens as you can find. Are mince
pies wholesome? They are eaten at
dinner after a course Of meat and veg
etables, but they are meat, and the
idea of having two meat courses! See !?
1t is heavy combination for a weak
stomach. Squash pie, apple or custard,
much better. Further advice at this
office.
The Ward County independent. [volume] (Minot, Ward County, N.D.) 1902-1965, 1914-11-26
Sunday was a superb dav and scor

Sunday was superb day and scores
were out in their autos. Most of the
machines are now in their winter
quarters, but if this lovely weather
continues. bring them out Nothing
like drive in this clear, cold winter
air, except it be a walk. Motoring is
great sport, but don't neglect to ex-
ercise "Shank's horses" Whatever
one does. don't hibernate for the win
ter like many do. The old as we'll as
the young can enjoy skating and
coasting. What pleasures there are
in North Dakota in the good old win
ter time. .-E.
The Ward County independent. [volume] (Minot, Ward County, N.D.) 1902-1965, 1914-11-26

North Dakotans can be thankful that
the hoof and mouth disease did not
create any furore in North Dakota.
We have just fairly started in, the
dairy business and the presence of
this disease would have been a terrible
blow to this business. At Peoria, ILL.,,
five thousand cattle had to be killed
and many thousand more in other
parts of the state.
The Ward County independent. [volume] (Minot, Ward County, N.D.) 1902-1965, 1914-11-26

A German sympathizer and one who
favors the armies Of the Allies got
into a wordy war in this city the other
night. It was a windy fight as they
fought the battles. A part of the
time the Kaiser's forces were in the
lead and then the Allies were supreme.
How foolish it seems for any Ameri-
can to become greatly exercised over
this war It is a terrible thing and
to properly describe the conflict, one
would have to exhaust the vocabulary
5of the English language, but it is bet
ter for Americans not to take any
part. What good can it do anyway
The Ward County independent. [volume] (Minot, Ward County, N.D.) 1902-1965, 1914-11-26

This is apparently the open season
for negroes. You will be fined $40 and
costs for killing a duck out of season,
but it has been demonstrated that if a
colored man is shot, his slayer not on
~ goes Scott free but perhaps may be
given a star and gun and appointed
Chief of Coonville.
The Ward County independent. [volume] (Minot, Ward County, N.D.) 1902-1965, 1914-11-26

1t is hard to believe these reports
that the Bull Moose party is rapidly
shrinking. From the looks of his pic
ture, he appears as large as ever.
The Ward County independent. [volume] (Minot, Ward County, N.D.) 1902-1965, 1914-11-26
QUICK SALE,

A motorist driving an antique car
passed the vehicle gate at an Iowa
fair without observing the gateman.
The gateman ran after him and shout
ed:
"Hey there! Dollar for your"
The brake damned, the car stopped,
and the owner got out.
well, mister" he said, guess
you've bought sumpin'."
The Ward County independent. [volume] (Minot, Ward County, N.D.) 1902-1965, 1914-11-26

Do not waste your good money on
war books. You get plenty Of pic
lures in the papers, and that is all
necessary. Publishers think people
are crazy for information and are
throwing a lot of cheap books on the
market. The war is not over, the
map will be changed, a year will
make great difference, and present
books will be out of date. Read the
papers for history and for maps.
The Ward County independent. [volume] (Minot, Ward County, N.D.) 1902-1965, 1914-11-26

Thank goodness, we are to have
English names at hotels for dishes on
bill of fare. Away with the French
titles that have puzzled plain travel
ers 50 long. Think Of pommes de
terre for potatoes, wiener schnitzel for
veal outlets, filet mignon for tender
loin, lala rookie for ice cream. Why
did brave Americans stand this non
sense for two generations? Let us
know what we are eating. If it is
American stuff, not Paris, say so
Next.
The Ward County independent. [volume] (Minot, Ward County, N.D.) 1902-1965, 1914-11-26

Class in English, step forward.
There's got to be. Better there must
be. Got is cheap word. Same space
Of time. Same time. Throng in upon.
Drop the in. Red Indian. They are
generally red, few white. Future
ahead of him. Of course, never behind
man. Rise up. Never rise down.
Stand up is another. Ella Flagg Young
is reported as saying I don't doubt but
that. Drop the but. I don't doubt
that. Study your grammars.
The Ward County independent. [volume] (Minot, Ward County, N.D.) 1902-1965, 1914-11-26

The Germans claim they will eat
Christmas dinner in London. Some
Englishman asks, (Which Christ
mas ?" @
The Ward County independent. [volume] (Minot, Ward County, N.D.) 1902-1965, 1914-11-26
w. M. SMART HAS

% FIVE FINE BOYS
A son was born to Mr.. and Mrs. w.
M. Smart Sunday morning. Mr..
Smart, who is one of the publishers
of the tic-Reporter, is now the
proud daddy of five fine boys.
The Ward County independent. [volume] (Minot, Ward County, N.D.) 1902-1965, 1914-11-26

Onward, Christian M ohammedan-
.Bhuddist- Shinto -Brahnin soldiers.
Elk.
The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1914-09-30
The Eagerly Helpful Congressman.

Extracts from leltor written by a
Congressman 10 one of his constituents:
"Ifyou have in mind any particular
government document please
write mo and will try TO secure II for
you.
"If there In baby In your family can
send you a very valuable government
document entitled Tho Care Of tho
Baby .
"If any Of your friends are lost or
stranded In Europe please lot mo know
and will try to locate them for you and
assist In getting them back 10 America.
have already located many rel
atives and friends Of my constituents and
II will afford mo pleasure to aid you In
this way.
"Pleaso remember my preliminary
competitive examination to DO
hold in Now York on October 2lst next,
to select cadet for Annapolis. Kindly
mention the matter to any eligible youog
mon among your acquaintance"
To which tho constituent replied:
"Y0ur letter OF September fifteenth for
votes has been received and noted"
The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1914-09-30
The Late Sebastian Cook.

Sebastian Cook, son Of John and Kath-
oryn Ritter Cook, was born at Cooks
burg, Barnett Township, July 4, 1887.
He was a member OF famil y Of eighteen,
three Of which survive him, who are
Jerry and Squire Cook and Mrs. Martha
Snyder Of this place. Those who have
gone before arc Dan, John, Mrs. Pipor,
Mrs. Young, Phillip, Andrew, Mrs. Ber-
lin, Mrs. Phipps, Mrs. Lindsey, Mrs.
Slocum. Mrs. Henry and Elijah.
Mr.. Cook spent nearly all his life In
this place aud to him do we owe the debt
of helping 10 clear the land aud building
permanent homes in Cooksburg. In the
year Of 1861, when Lincoln called for vol
unteers, Mr.. Cook WAS one Of tho first 10
respond, eDlisting on the first day Of
July, 1901. He enlisted In the Tenth
Regiment Of tho Pennsylvania Reserves,
Company Il, and was under Capt. Phipps,
aud later, Capt. Knox. He fought in
,omo great battles, among which were
tho battle OF tho w lderness, and battle Of
Bull Run. He fought In the Seven Days
Battle until the II fth day, when he was
wounded In the ankle by n bullet shot by
n rebel soldier. After suffering for al.
most a week from this wound he was
taken TO Baltimore TO the hospital, where
be remained for six months, when he in.
sisted on going back into the battle field
Physicians, understanding his physical
condition, refused his request and he was
granted an honorable discharge January
|, 1868. Yet no man ever loved his coun.
try better; he never boastod OF his ser.
vice but many an old soldier will today
toll Of his great bravery.
In 1865 no was married TO Miss Sara
Morgan, who still survives him and has
indeed proved herself faithful compan.
ion. To this union nine children were
born, all OF which survive him, except
one, Mrs. Betty Socum, who preceded
him to the other world five years ago.
The children are Andrew, william, Au
gustus, Ooburn, Mrs. Robert Cook, Of
this place, Mrs. Ida Boyd of Clarion,
Mrs. William Smathers of Kane, and
Mrs. Edward Merchant Of Mayburg. He
was also survived by thirty-nine grand
children and nine great-grsndchildren
Mr.. Cook was taken III on Wednesday,
Sept o, 1914, and though everything that
human hand could do, the "Angel OF
Death" could not be barred and he was
called to his eternal home on Monday
morning. While sick no was attended
by DR.. Rimer and Miss Naylon. lie was
n good citizen, kind neighbor, faithful
worker, and will be greatly missed.
From tho beginning Of his Illness friends
hoped for his recovery, but when they
saw II In vain his son-in.law asked "if
no was ready to die" He said, 81 am"
Io had "A smile and kind word for
everyone, and was known to everyone In
tho community m "Unclo BGas." We
griovo at tho thought that no In gone.
novor TO return, but he has erected a
The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1914-09-30
M.er,ehaum and tn. Turks.

Meerschnnm nsed TO be considered
u mere curiosity by the Turks. who
had no other use for II than NJ sub
stltute for fnllpr's soap. The story runs
that the Turkish ambassador at the
Austrian court. In the eighteenth cen.
tury. was native Of EgkI Scheir.
Wanting to help his city nj time Of
great poverty. he took n sample of this
queer stun TO Vienna. thinking that
the Franks" ns all foreigners were
then called. might have some use for
t. The Germans we're quick TO see
It's utility for pipe bowls. but declared
that II was good for nothing else. More
than century has confirmed this
judgment. for who has yet discovered
any other use for meerschaum? For
pipe making II IL an ideal raw ma
terinl Here II stone which Is easily
moulded when wet and when dry be-
comes hard and resists fire.
The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1914-09-30
No Time To Swap Horses.

AZ sure M you arc living, II Forest
county sends now man to the Legislature
this fall, ono who is not thoroughly posted
on tho way they have Of doing things In
Harrisburg, tho iniquitous and hideous
water snake, against which our county
made such brave fight two years ago,
will pass tho Legislature, and our county
bo turned over to tho tender mercies Of
tho water grabbors, and the hldoous dams,
tho moro thoughts OF which have given
uH nightmares and put M all on tho verge
Of nervous prostration, will become a
reality and Forest county will bo practi-
cally wiped of tho map. This In not n
theory but condition that stares the resi-
dents OF tho TlOneHta creek aud tho Alle-
ebony river vallios In tho teeth. Do you
want to joopardizo your life, your family,
your home by such n condition. Thon
don't trust your business In tho loglsla-
turo 10 green hand at this critical stage.
Had II not been for tho excellent and in
tolliRont walchlulnesH Of Mr.. Mochling
experienced mombors Of tho Legislature
nt tho last session those bills would have
slipped through, and our county and n
fow others In this onG Of tho State would
today bo In tho grip Of tho wator power
grabborS. No groon hand could have
watched aud avorted this calamity. Woll
do wo remember the excellent work, also,
ofox.Judgo Krotlor, tho lato II. u. Col
lins, N. +. Whoolor, Attorney A. g..
Brown, representing tho County Com
misslonors, and others. In killing of this
obnoxious legislation, aud tho humorous
trips tbey made 10 Harrisburg to fight
those HnakoH.
Consider these facts thoroughly.
thoughlfuly. Lay aside any prejudice
you may have formed. Forget your likos
or dialikos aud mako up your mind to
volo for and work for your own interests.
This IL no time To swap horsos.
The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1914-09-30

THE determination Of tho adminIslra-
ton at Warrington 10 Impose burden
some war taxes In times Of peace, a. a
ruse solely To cover the failure Of tho
Democratic tariff legislation, has brought
the voters Of Pennsylvania to a full sense
Of their duty at this particular time and
tbe Republicans have abundant reasons
for their belief that lhe people will not
only rebuke tho administration, but will
vote with all possible emphasis against
Mr.. Palmer who has had much 10 do
with framing tho disastrous Democratic
policies at Washington. Under all the
conditions an old time Republican ma
Jorliy In Pennsylvania seems assured,
aud the Republicans arc now In tho thick
ofa fight with absolute confidence Of sue
cess for their entire ticket.
The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1914-09-30

THE Public Ledger Of Pbllsdelp phia. ono
Of tho stauncbest Of tho Rspu blican
papers, forosaw what evil effects lbs At.
tempt 70 rs.elect Penrose would bring to
the party In this state. In a clarion call
10 the Republicans Of Pennsy lvaDia II dc.
ClAfsd that PsDfJss WAS a menace 10 ths
National Rspubicanism and II tho party
was 10 live aud regain popular confidence.
Penross must be defeated. .- Democratic
Vindicator.
Tho Public Ledger Ia not now and
never was Republican paper, and the
most conservative and best posted people
positively declare that la attitude In the
campaign will add not one loss than 49,
900 TO Penrose's majority in Philadelphia
alone
The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1914-09-30
Mirabesu as an Orator.

No one. not even Talleyrand- could
approach Nlrsbeau as speaker. and.
.uriously enough. this violent emo
.iOnal man vas. as orator, perfectly
Ielf pOssessed:
During the debate on the disturb
inces at Marseilles the Right inter
upied his speech with cries Of sland-
,rer. liar. scoundrcl. assassin. He
topped for moment and BOXED at
he excited members who we're be
gathering bin with their vile words:
am waiting. gentlemen he said. for
bese amenities TO die down Then he
vent on with bis speech at the point
where be had broken or"
His face. pItted with smallpox. wns
ugly. says the author Of "Mirabeau,T
but his very uglines. transformed By
the play of his countenance. was mar
YelOusly turned into n source Of power.
When be shook his terrible bOars
head" he was terrifying and no man
dared 10 interrupt him.
The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1914-09-30
The Soot,a Consolation.

He was frugal Scot, and when the
collection plate came round he dropped
In Ilorin In mistake for the humble
copper Speedily discovering his mis-
take, however, he stepped softly down
the aisle aud requested the collector
to give him back the coin. which re-
quest was politely but firmly refused
A shade Of disappointment nitted DER
the northcrner's face as he walked
slowly back to his pew. "Awcel." he
said, its loss, but there's some sma'
consolation In rclectln' It's bad one.
II might have got me into trouble any
where else. Pail Mall Gazette.
The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1914-09-30

THg call Of lbs Elephant to the men
who have been following the Bull Moose,
bot now have no candidate Of their own
for Governor, IL being heard and needed.
Many PrOgressiye. Republicans would
have preferred Lewis 70 Brumbaugb, be-
cause Lewis vas their candidate, but an
for dssertlng both wings Of the Republi.
can movement and going over TO the
machine Democrats like Mccormick
lha. II "something else already frank.
lin News