davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-01-09
Couldn't Be Better.

Sir Walter Scott was sitting in his
library one day when a tall High
lander, who had been erecting an inn
nearby, entered and said:
May it please you, Sir Walter, I
am going to call my place The Flod-
den Inn,' and as ye've written a poem
on Floddlan Field it struck me and
the guide wife that you might gle US
a line for a motto"
Have you read the poem?" Sir
Walter asked.
No, sir; I'm nae reader"
We'll, I should advise you to read
the poem and take line from it"
And what'I it be-"
Sir Walter, without smile, replied
Drink, weary traveller; drink and
pray"
But" cried the Highlander, aghast,
my inns no kirk; and the more
prayin' there Is the less drinkin'
theren be, and i dinna want that"
oh" laughed the poet, Il think
can alter the line. Drink, weary trav-
eler, drink and pay"
The vera thing" shouted the
other In delight.-Sunday Magazine OF
the Chicago Record-Herald.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-01-09
SELF DELUSION.
Many People Deceived by Coffee.

We like to defend our indulgencies
and habits even though we may be-
convinced of their actual harmfulness.
A man can convince himself that
whiskey is good for him on a cold
morning, or beer on hot summer NY
when he wants the whiskey or beer.
It's the same with coffee. Thou
sands of people suffer headache and
nervousness year after year but try to
persuade themselves the cause is not
coffee-because they like coffee.
while yet a child I commenced
using coffee and continued it," writes
a Wis. man, until l was a regular
coffee fiend. 1 drank it every morning
and in consequence had binding
headache nearly every afternoon.
MY folks thought it was coffee that
allied me, but l liked it and would not
admit 1t was the cause of my trouble,
so l stuck to coffee and the headaches
stuck to me.
Finally, the folks stopped buying
coffee and brought home some Postum.
They made it right directions on
pkg.) and told me to see what differ
ence it would make with my head, and
during that first week on Postum my
old affection did not bother me once.
From that day to this we have used
nothing but Postum in place Of coffee
headaches are thing OF the past
and the whole family is in fine health"
Postum looks good, smells good,
tastes good, is good, and does good to
the whole body
Name given by Postum Co, Battle
Greek, Mich. Read THE Road to Well
ville,' in pkgs.
Postum now comes in two forms:
Regular Postum-must be we'll
boiled.
Instant Postum-is a soluble pow
der. & teaspoonful dissolyes quickly
in a cup Of hot water and, with cream
and sugar, makes a delicious beverage
Instantly. Grocers sell both kinds.
There's a Reason" for Postum.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-01-09
Left Him Out Of Ii.

At country ball farmer HAD
engaged a pretty coQuette for the
next dance; but q gallant captain
coming along, persuaded the young
lady to cancel her previous engage
ment in favor OF himself The far
mer, overhearing the conversation.
went to a card table and sat down to
a game OF whist
A few minutes later the captain
stepped up to the young lady to ex-
cuse himself, as he had forgotten
that he was already engaged to an
to her Miss Coquette, much cha
grined, then made tracks for the
whist table, hoping to secure her first
partner.
Nodding to the farmer, and with her
face covered with smiles, she sweet
ly said:
q think, sir, that it is time to take
cur places"
The old farmer, in the act OF divid-
ing the pack for the next dealer, cour-
teously replied:
mo, Miss s.; 1 mean to keep my
present place. When ladies shuttle, J
cut"
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-01-09
SOME BEST RECIPES.

A delicious fruit salad and an mex
pensive one, is made By soaking
prunes over night and then cutting
them into small pieces with scissors;
add diced celery and walnut meats.
Mix well with mayonnaise dressing.
Polish Dish.--After boiling saeur
hraut one hour, drain it thoroughly;
mix with it two cupfuls of mashed po-
tatoes and fry three slices of diced
bacon with one small onion, and add
to the kraut. Let it simmer one min
ute, then take from the stove Scrape
fine one section of garlic and stir we'll
into the kraut
Another dish from Poland: For a
six-pound pork roast, mince two cloves
Of garlic and mix with salt and pep
per. Rub this we'll into the meat and
let 1t stand over night to season.
Economical Ragout.-Put four table
spoonfuls of butter in a pan to brown.
Fry brown a two and a half pound
steak cut two inches thick; cut up
four onions, two tomatoes and one
green pepper. Pile on top and around
pan with water and simmer slowly I'M
til thoroughly tender.
Baked Oysters and Macaroni.-Cook
a half cupful of broken bits of maca-
roni in boiling water until tender.
Drain, and put layer of macaroni into
a well buttered baking dish; dust well
with salt and paprika, then put on a
layer of we'll washed oysters, salt pep
per and a few bits of butter. Their
add another layer of macaroni and
oysters, using just two layers of oys-
tiers. never more, for they do not cook
we'll if too many i'll the dish. Pour
over a cup of rich white sauce.
sprinkle with buttered crumbs and
bake until the oysters are plump and
curled. A half hour in rather hot
0ypn
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-01-09
Get Sugar in Other WAYS.

1t is significant that the nations
who consume the most oil and light
wines. all of which contain greater or
less amounts of compounds OF carbon
and water, consume the least sugar
per capita. The natives of Italy.
Greece and Turkey, for example, con,
sumo annually but one-twelfth OF the
amount Of sugar per capita that is
consumed by the natives OF Great
Britain Food Journal.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-01-09
Seasonable DIALOGUE.

The shades of the goose and turkey
were discussing the circumstances
which had attended their respective
deaths.
Did you offer any objection when
first the cruel farmer laid hands ,on
you?" sympathetically Inquired the
gohbler.
Yes" replied his gooseship; Il
cried out, Halloa what's this"
What did you say next?" inquired
the now thoroughly interested turkey,
as the other paused for a moment
oh the goose replied Il did not
say anything more just then; l was
wrung off"
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-01-09

We two may never meet, [ know,
And splashing seas may lie between us;
Hereafter there may never grow
a ported palm or vine to screen us;
I may. you have said give way
To useless signing and to sorrow.
And mourn the chance | have today
When l sit down to think, tomorrow.
But, even II our ways shall part
And il our hopes must bloom asunder,
Shall happiness avoid my heart,
And no fond lips press mine, l wonder:
fare,
Nay. though through Noman's Land I
III meet some brave one-never doubt
it
Who will gladly embrace me there,
Without first Iecturing about il.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-01-09

is wide, inches wide Gnside), and
inches deep Cinside4; divide these
boxes into two compartments each.
as shown, and cut a doorway II.
inches in diameter into each compart-
ment. Cut a board to fit the top of
each box for a cover. and bend
piece of wire into the shape of a
hook Gig Al and fasten it in the
proper position to hook on to
short nail or screw driven into the
edge of the cover Gig. q. Fasten
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-01-09
Achievement.

What have you accomplished in
this world, anyhow? You have never
led an army, have you? You have
never held high Office in which YOU
rendered valuable service to the PEG
pie. You have never written book
never acted great part in any impOr-
tant movement-you have never done
anything, as far as | know, which
should entltle you to the honor you
complain that the public has not be-
slowed upon you"
Say, you forget that L once taught
pig to climb ladder and pick out
numbers representing the day of the
month on which General Grant was
born"
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-01-09
BARNkBY LOST MATCH
PERSUASIVE STRANGER WENT
AWAY WITH NEW HAT.
And the Loser Is Firmly Convinced
That the Aforesaid Stranger Had
No Real Regard for the
Strict Truth.

$3.50 for it. 1t was a black derby,
size rs, and although it was not
particularly fine hat, it was becoming,
and Barnaby expected to get good
deal of wear out of it.
Two days later he lost it. The wind
blew it away just as the car on which
Barnaby was homeward bound passed
q downtown street Barnaby was rid
ing on the rear platform. He jumped
of the car, and gave chase with sur
prising agility. The wind, however,
was brisker than he, and he ran half
block, with the hat now out OF sight.
now In, before catching up with it.
Finally he came within reaching dis
lance and stopped to grab the rolling
derby. but before he could lay hands
on it another man ran up from the
opposite direction and caught it. The
other man also was bareheaded.
by Jove," he said. breathlessly If
that wasn't stir chase"
1T certainly was" Barnaby assent
ed. I'm much obliged to you for run
ming out and stopping the hat for me-
The other man stepped back anu
clapped the derby on his own head.
Well" he said, IF you haven't
got nerve. didn't stop it for you;
/ stopped it for myself The hat is
mine"
Barnaby followed him up threaten
ingly.
Now, see here" he growled, Il
am not in a mood for any fooling.
l want my hat"
But it isn't yours" the other man
persisted
1t is mine" said Barnaby 1T
blew off my head from one OF those
cars"
The other man kept his temper ad-
mirably.
My dear sir" he said Il am sorry
to contradict you, but | can prove
that it blew OFF my head just as
came out OF that building around the
corner"
Impossible" said Barnaby. 1T is
mine. paid $3.50 for IT,"
The cold wind that ruftied Barnaby's
uncovered hair did not tend to allay
up in Yigor what it lacked in elegance.
The other man grew serious.
Say" he said, Il believe you really
do think this hat is yours. Unfortu-
nately, ] am as firmly convinced that
it is mine, and since one Of us has got
to give in and go home with his top
knot exposed to the elements, lets
Oh. 70 R,,I iaE
shall be-"
They matched for it, to the infinite
satisfaction of several small boys, who
had been drawn thither by the noisy
argument The other man won the
hat
Il hate like the mischief to see you
hang around here bareheaded,' he
said sympathetically but your own
hat is surely somewhere in the neigh
borhood. Perhaps these boys can help
you find it."
Thanks" said Barnaby, you are
very kind. / suppose you are acting
on the level, but ! could have sworn
that hat belonged to me-
A few minutes after the man had
gone on they found the other hat. A
messenger boy picked it up in a door
way, where 1t had been lodged by the
wind.
Barnaby took the battered headgear
and looked It over sorrowfully. 1t
was a very dilapidated hat. The
crown was denied and rusty with age,
the rim was bent, but the size was
tn
Il guess he lied to you, didn't he,
mister?' the boy chuckled.
1T looks that way" said Barnaby.
But it is one way TO get new
hat" the boy pursued.
1T certainly is" said Barnaby
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-01-09

We two may never meet again:
The world is wide seas may divide us
Why should we squander or disdain
This chance with which Fate has sup
piled us.
Why scorn the kiss | offer you?
Why should we dream OF future bliss
A present gladness biindly losing?
tomorrow YOU may crave the kiss
That you are stubbornly refusing.
Tomorrow, when it is too late
When leagues between us may be lying,
You may bemoan your lonely fate
And waste the hours in futile signing;
Perhaps within a mile or two
The ways we go may be divergng;
Why scorn the kiss | offer you?
Tomorrow l may not be urging
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-01-09
World Beyond Our Ken.

There are noises louder than thun.
der which we cannot hear, the roar
that lies on the other side of silence
We men are poor, restless prisoners,
hemmed in by our senses as by the
wall Of cell. hearing only a part
Of Natures orchestra and that part
imperfectly; seeing only a thousandth
part OF the color marvels about us
and seeing that infinitesimal part in
correctly and partially.-From I'm.
pathed Waters" by Frank Harris.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-01-09
GOOD THINGS TO EAT.

A most delicious conserve, confec-
ton or dessert. whichever occasion
demands. is prepared by stufing
half pound of pulled figs with saited
almonds. Put two tablespoonful OF
sugar. one teaspocnful Of lemon juice
and half cup ct orange juice over
the fire; when heated add figs, cover
and cook until the figs are tender.
turning and basting often.
Hot Rice Pudding.-Wash a half
cupful of rice in cold water and put
it in a double boiler with hot milk.
Cook quickly until tender, then add
two tablespoonfuls OF sugar, two ia
blespoonfuls of butter and half tea
spoonful of salt Beat one egg until
light and add 1t to the rice, cooking
for one minute Pour into the dish
in which the pudding is sent to the
table Mix two tablespoonfuls OF SUI
gar with two tablespoonfuls of butter
and a third of a teaspoonful of CHINA
mon; sprinkle over the top of the pud'
ding. This. will make brown sauce
over the top. Serve hot.
Of dried split peas, wash them and
soak in plenty Of cold water over
night. In the morning pour off the
water and put the peas into kettle
with two quarts of cold water, two
inch cube of salt pork and one onion
sliced Cook slowly until the peas
have become very soft, stirring fire.
quently from the bottom to prevent
burning 1t will probably require four
or five hours to cook them properly
When they are soft, rub them through
a sieve, return to the kettle and re-
heat Cream together two tablespoon
fuls each of butter and flour, thin 1t
with little of the boiling soup, add
two cupfuls Of milk and stir into the
soup. Season with salt and pepper
and serve very hot.
French Beans.-Fresh string beans
are preferred for this dish, though the
canned variety will answer. If fresh
beans are used cook until tender,
drain, then put back into the sauce
pan with bits Of finely chopped onion.
parsley, celery and little meat stock
Boil up we'll, then add the yolks OF two
eggs well beaten with the juice of
lemon, and serve hot.
A little pot of stock should never be
wanting in any housekeepers store, as
there are so many dishes which are
greatly improved by cupful of we'll
favored stock. This stock need not
be made of especially prepared bones
or meat; it may be mixture of chick
en- bones. beefsteak bone or bits of
any kind of meat cooked and the
broth strained and kept in a cold
place.
Attempt the end, and never stand to
doubt,
THE blood more stirs
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-01-09
Proper Beneficiary.

Since you worked your examples
% nicely" said the pretty teacher, I
shall give VOC kiss. Teacher, l
didn't know there was TO be a re
ward, responded the honest urchin.
It's only fair to tell you that my big
brother cid them sums
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-01-09
Az IL Often Hannens

The man who has to pay for getting
three lines concerning his marriage
published may when he is divorced get
a column or two without putting up
a cent.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-01-09
IzZk-.N ~,<s.xN-.
corsican Forests.

The forests of Corsica. the little
island upon which Napoleon was born,
are managed by the French govern
ment They produce lumber. firewood
and turpentine, and all parts of the
tree are far more closely utilized than
in America.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-01-09
Appreciafion.

Il was strongly tempted when we
take you in my arms and kiss you.
Would you have been very angry with
me il had hone SOP
'Yes-very. But thank you for the
compliment"
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-01-09
One of That Kind

What kind OF girl is she?''
One OF the kind that think you
don't care for them unless you spend
at least IS on champagne the first
evening"
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-01-09

yet"
What's the mat
ter now, Liz"
You told John
to go down to the
depot and get the
earl s baggage,
right out loud so
that he couldn't
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-01-09
Proaressive Science.

Medicine is a progressive science.
1t is ROW only $500 years since Hippo
crates time and a cure for whooping.
cough is believed TO be in sight. At
least the specialists Of Paris hope so,
Chicago News.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-01-09

help nearing you. Why can't you
learn to say station and luggage?"
"Oh, don't mind that The earl won't
care. He's got used to United States,
talk He asked me this morning how
| got my dough and how much | had
of it."
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-01-09
Strain Was loo Great.

"Heah about Chawlie?"
"No. What's wrong with him?"
Brain feyah."
my word, What caused ito"
Trying TO roll cigarette in high
wind"
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-01-09
Tribute to the Scriptures.

II anything / have ever said or writ.
ten deserves the feehlest encomiums
of my fellow-countrymen | have no
hesitation in declaring that for their
Partially l am Indebted, solely in,
debted, to the daily and attentive pc
rusal of the sacred Scriptures, the
source Of all true poetry and elo-
quence, as well as Of all good aud all
comfort.-Dauiei Webster.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-01-09
a Ref Either NAV

Matron-Baby is crying. Mary. l
expect he wants his bottle.
Mary just give it to i'm, mum
Matron-Did you? Then | expect
he doesn't want it--,Judge
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-01-09
Sure Sinn.

Il believe the prima donna we heard
was once a cook
What makes you think that?''
Isn't she always falling down In
the aria?''
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-01-09

Many a man who is complaining be
cause the world does not take him for
what he is worth would be kicking
harder if 1t did.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-01-09
Heaven.

What is your idea of heayen?"
"a place in which the tailors can't
change the style Of mems coats every
season"
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-01-09

If woman knows that man knows
what she is going to do next she in
variably does something else.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-01-09

She-Women can fight as we'll as
men.
He-Certainly, if it comes to the
scratch.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-01-09

Mrs. Wnsow's Soothing Syrup for Children
teethug, softcns the gums, reduces inhamma-
ton allays pain cures wind colo ,25c bottle.Ads
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-01-09
lusher's Lexicon.

Positive: Just a wee ane.
Comparative: A wee drap In cor ee.
Superlatiye: Fou.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-01-09

genius is no better off than the bone
head
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-01-09

Lots of people could help more by
not saying so much
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-01-09
||WeKTEGEzEN
||Y2aH(aABHNET
IIZIL7 W =
'I'& h e6n -

" OMETIMES 1 wonder wheth-
~ er God might not have made
the world so rich and fun just to teach
his children humility.
George Macdonald.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-01-09

The great tbing in the world is not
s. much 10 seek happiness as TO earn
peace ana seIf-respect. Huxley
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-01-09
st is an Epidemic Catarrhal Fevcs
Caused by Bacillus that Gener-
ally Leaves the Patient Weak
After the Acute Stage
Has Passed.


Do not make the error oc regarding
grip as an exaggerated cold. There
IS a big difference between the two
Grip is an epidemic disease that poi
sons the vital organs. When n per-
son has grip. the air passages ara
alive with millions or barillk poison
ing the blood. The infected person
feels tired and exhausted.
Psruna 10 a Tonic Laxative.
1t requires a good tonic laxative to-
keep the body OF the patient as strong
as possible to counteract the effect OF
the poisons created by the grip bacil-
1us. An expectorant tonic with SOME
laxative qualities is the safest rem
edy. Such is Peruna. Beware es-
pecially OF coal tar powders or tablets
because they lessen the vitality or tho
patient.
There is no specific for the grip
Peruna has been used with good
success in former grip epidamics. In
dications point to the return of grip
this winter
DO not fail to read the experiences
of former grip PATIENTS with Peruna-
Mrs. Gentry Gates, S219 First Ave,
East Lake, Ala, writes; "B had n
bad case of grip. / tried Peruna and
it cured me. 1 can safely say 1t is a.
fine medicine
Mrs. Charles e. Wells, Sr., go
South St, Delaware. Ohio, writes:
After a severe attack OF la grippe I
took Peruna and found 1t a good
tonic"
ASK Your Druggist for Free Peruna
Lucky Day Almanac for 1914.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-01-09
NO HARM DONE.

Dear me, pa" said the beautiful
ress, you'll mortify me to death
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-01-09
How They Love Each Other.

Maud-The man ( marry must be
we'll off.
Kate-And not know it.-Bostou
Evening Transcript
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-01-09
Self Annexation.
ant afford the juicy steak

The porterhOuse steak Will soon be for
the millionaire Only-News Item
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-01-09
Love Is Costly.

It cost the Samaritan much to act
this way. Racial pride. aesthetic re
pugnance, commercial obligations,
perhaps family duties. TO say nothing
Of the actual expenditures Of time and
money. But love is a costly thing.
Jesus himself fully portrays this pic
ture, John 3:f6. The road was away
from Gods city. Jerusalem
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-01-09
Il Cart BE DonA

No man has ever prcfted by cheat
ing himself
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-01-09

IT.
/ can't afford the juicy steak
That once was such joy to me:
Such nourishment 7 may not take
Upon my present salary.
No costly porterhouse for mine;
l take a seat beside the board
And with a bird and bottle dine
On such things az l may afford.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-01-09

LESSON TExT-T.uise 10:26-37.
GOLDEN TEXT-"Thou shalt love thy
felgbbor as thyseif. l2:3L
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-01-09

Ask Your Druggist for Free Peruna
Lucky Day Almanac for 1914.