The Bottineau courant. (Bottineau, Bottineau County, N.D.) 1895-1929, 1914-02-06
...An...
Experiment
By DONALD CHAMBERLIN

when l started for hum l met Martha
Hodges.
"Evenin'. Mr.. Rogers" she said.
"On your way home. l reckon. 1t
must be mighty pleasant to have such
a nice home as yours to 60 to after
a hard days work."
1T used to be 'slong as mother and
Anna lived. but now it's kind q lone
some. Besides. when q feller's tired
out he don't want to cook bis supper
and wash Dishes"
why don't you git married? Then
you'd have some n to do your cook
in for you and wash the dishes and
take keer o. the house."
WAL" I said. kind O thinkin' out
loud. II don't know but that's q good
idee. But 1t amt SO simple as would
appear. Furst of. a feller's got to
find the gal be wants. and to make 1t
a 60 she's got to want him. Then.
1t is a go. it's easy and cheap
enough to git married: you kin git a
parson to do the job for whatever you
like to pay. Now. ! can't hitch two
critters together and expect EN- to
travel easy. Furst OF. one on EN- II
plunge for'ard. and t'other II hang
back. Then one on EN- II balk when
the other is sot down to a stiddy gait.
That's the way it is when two pus-
son begin tt travel the matrimonial
road together. And. s'posin' that in
stead Of gettin' used to the same kind
o goin' they git wuss and wuss. what
you goin' to do Them"
"Oh. Mr.. Rogers" says Martha.
you're a pessimist. and the wust kind
Of a one."
II don't know what that is. but I
do know that gittin' married Ia like
buyin' a pig in a poke. You kin e
the gal plain enough on the outside.
but you don't know what she ia on
the inside. She may be white as
snow on the surface. and not two
inches down she may be a smolderin'
Gre. ready to burst out at any mo-
ment."
"IIl tell you what ri do With yon.
Reckon yon don't want me. and I'm
not hankerin' to cit married. YOn kin
experiment on me Is you like. and II
you don't lnd out at the end q nix
months that I'm what you took me
for in the beginnin' I'll agree with you
that winner is mighty deceptive"
SWELL. now. that's Accommodate. I
declare" I SAYS to her. "When shall
beging"
whenever you like"
"IM commence tonight. when I've
had supper and got the dishes washed"
"You needn't mind about the dishes.
Jest you let EN- alone tonight. To.
morrer when you're out to work I'll "a
in and tidy up for you and do your
dishes. where'll I dnd the door key?'
"Hangin' under the porch. left side
near the front"
She'd started on. and I didn't say 10
more. I went on hum. got my sup
per and Tux Martha mt her word. leav-
in the dishes in the pan. About 2
o'clock I went over to her house and
found that she'd done her evenin'
chores and was a.sittin' before q blaz-
in fire. darnin' stockin's. thanked
her for the offer she'd made me and
told her when she'd convinced me
that wimmen al jest az amiable al
they looked I'd like for her to put
me onter a nice gal that I cOuld ex-
pertinent on. with a view to marriage.
She said she would If she could hit on
the right gal
spent a couple Of hours with Mar.
tha. toppin' of with some cakes and
cider she brought ont. The next day.
when | went home at noon. I found
the dishes wished. the pots and ket-
ties shinin' like IoOkin' glasses and
everything spick and span. BY
crackey. ] hardly knowed the place.
That was Saturday. and ! th0rt !
onghter 90 = the same evenin' and
thank Martha. did 40. and she
said that for a few weeks she'd clean
MP for me every saturday.
After that every Saturday mornin'
Martha put everything to rights. and
dropped in to thank her Saturday
evenin' She said she'd do It for a
few weeks. but the few weeks RrOwed
into a few months.
Meanwhile I was a-watchin' her to
see II she was good all the way
through or only vanished. At last ]
told her that I was we'll satisfied with
the experiment and l didn't think
wimmen was 40 Onsa rtin' after all. I'd
been 50 encouraged by her goodness
that l concluded to git married. She
looked very mnch pleased after this
and asked me who ! was gOin' to
marry | hadn't any one in view: hut.
thinkin' ! Onghter name somebody. In.
asmnch as said ! was gOfn' to git
married. said the gal was Matilda
Blake
'You list oughter seen the change in
Martha Her face got red. and her
eyes fairly spit fire.
"Matilda Rlaker!' she said. mighty
e~cOrnfnl. ''She doesn't know how tn
fry bacon. She couldn't sew a hutton
on yonr coat She couldn't even darn
xt0ckin's."
.otN .n~oNu IN AoPonSn ~ Matilda