davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1914-08-27
Globe Sights
BIZ THE ATCHIooN 0toDA

A good Judge Of whiskey 10 not .
good Judge.
A man who isn't very strong likes
to think he il mighty quick.
When a man puts the wrong end Of
a lighted cigar in his mouth he can't
swear.
Every town has a genius whose in
genuity IL largely devoted to getting q
new job.
Don't estimate the value of your
popularity until you attempt to collect
money on it.
It may be said for the weekend
visitor that she doesn't linger a. long
as some of the o. t. varieties.
This also il the season of the year
when most Of the ball teams begin
winning next years pennants.
After a young man 10 twenty years
Of age and stays at home without pay
about him.
There il a counterfeit for most of
the genuine articles: a real southern
gentleman, sub, doesn't need to get
drunk to prove 1t.
Oratory wouldn't be much of an
amusement for the orator IL he had
no audience, and there are others who
appreciate q good listener.
Measles and the truth take differ
! emily. No two members of an auto
mobile party. no matter how conscien-
tious, tell the same story in regard to
the time consumed on a cross-country
trip.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1914-08-27
Jayhawker Jots

You can't depend too much on out
side appearance. insists the Erie Rec
ord. The poorest show we ever saw
had a parade that was a dandy.
AS the Norton County News sug-
gests: The rim Of the dollar marks
the horizon Of some mems life, and
the ring Of the dollar Is tho only music
they care to hear.
A man once owned an automobile
which he did not want and tried to
sell 1t. tells the Beloit Gazette. Final
ly. after advertising the sale of the car
in the paper without result, he an
nounced in the paper that he would
leave the car In the alley and anyone
who wanted it could have 1t. He
thought the car would be gone in the
morning, acting under the theory that
get for nothing, but when he went out
in the yard the next morning someone
had left him another car.
Jim Rogers has probably the only
trained cattle horse in this part OF the
state. reports the Smith County Jour-
nal. A third of a century ago 1t was
common sight to see an unruly COW or
steer hitched with q 50-foot rope to
the saddle horn and the horse given
the management while the herder fol-
lowed In the wake and gave what as
sistance was needed in keeping tho
animal on the move. That clever step
per of which Jim Rogers is SO proud
was performing the feat with perfect
ease in town yesterday afternoon.
Sayings, by Click Fockele in the
LIE Roy Reporter: No man ever got 20
smart that he wouldn't write love let
tiers. There are always two sides
to every questionable wrong side and
the side you are on. 1t Is our
candid opinion that every Judge at a
baby show deserves a Carnegie hero
medal. No excuse seems quite
as reasonable to the person to whom
1t is made as 1t does to the person who
makes 1t. There is said to be an
exception to every rule, but no woman
ever started on q trip without forget
ting something.
A few observations, by Miss Carl
son. in the Lindsborg News: Almost
any man can respect an open, avowed
enemy, but it takes special grace from
Providence to forgive G. friend who
proves false. And then perhaps
you have noticed that when it comes
to selecting peaches q man seems to
prefer the clingstone variety. -. .
Many q woman thinks more OF her
husbands life insurance than she dc
of her husband. but usually she IL too
smart to let him suspect it. -. d.
Every child has a right to a happy
childhood. It Is cruel to make chill
dren feel that they are burdens: yet
1t IL often done, and such children
carry with them through life a heart
hurt that never heals.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1914-08-27
POINTED PARAGRAPHS.

Iron the Chicago News.
Please others and you may please
yourself.
Beware OF people whose politeness
ID inclined to sIop over.
The heyday Of youth isn't in it with
the pay day Of manhood.
Better q $40 wedding suit than a
$4,000 breach Of promise suit.
Many politician has found it easier
to make record than to explain It,
Even the sarcastic woman cuts out
her cutting remarks when she has an
ak to grind.
We anxiously await the day when
all tho knockers and lxickers will get
together and fight 1t out
Still. Jobs patience wasn't taxed to
the limit II his next-door neighbor
didn't own a $1.98 phonograph.
Very likely, however, the manufac-
turers of inhuman foot gear have to
wear the same kind as they sell, which
is az near retribution rs the law al
lows
When the bartender begins to call a
patron by his first name 1t is time for
him-the patron-to stop and consider
whether he really can take 1t or leave
it alone.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1914-08-27
@6kRz& &A p E!{&S%
WS% BY ENRS E4N4LHER
BY mrs AMLfER

at you," he said at last. IT see that you
are not SO handsome that you can At
ford to laugh or make fun Of me-
,,,t me az don nxs stood up very straight
nave heard many times what .
fine looking animal am, he said. s.and
no doubt look particularly handsome
to y youa' who are 80 plain and awk-
IF you had not hurt my feelines
by making fun Of mo-" said the colt,
I never woulc have thought Of beine
80 rude, but ~ you have expressed
yourself 80 freely. I will tell you that
ing fellow. was making fun Of you
Your head - badly shaped. your ears
are too long. they look like . wind
mill, and your tail looks like q piece
Your mouth IL 80 large that when you
laugh one fears you will split your
head in half. and altogether you cer-
tatnly are not q beauty"
hut the donkey was too ccnceited to
believe that "Y0u are certainly mis-
taken" he said. IT have always been
called handsome. and ~ for being
stupid that cannot be true. for am
always consulted upon all questions By
That all may be true" said tho
colt. for the other animals are kind
ana confederate Of your feelings, and
had you been the same you might new
eE nave ne1Su now RIDICULOUS you
really are, for had never thought
about your locks until you made fun
OF me-"
The donkey walked away with ra&h-
er a crestfalleu air.
While he did not really believe that
he looked ~ the colt had said. it Wor-
ried him to know that any one thousht
he was not handsome.
b oiir outspokeu Judgment OF the
faults Of otherss We .o1tda can atten-
ton to our own 6afarfa - ffv<,r,,~t~H<
1914. by the Mcclure Newspauer svn-
dicate.)
Tomorrow's story-.IAttle Inhx.~
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1914-08-27

Two-thirds Of q normal corn crop
for Kansas isn't so bad, and especially
In . year when the wheat crop was of
such bumper proportions. But the
conditions which usually make a good
wheat year a poor corn year were not
responsible this time for the falling
off in the corn crop. It's the early
spring weather that is best for wheat
which il held not to be desirable for
corn. But the spring of this year APP
peared to be as good for the corn as 1t
was for the wheat. Early summer
prospects for big corn yield per acre
we're never better in Kansas than they
were this year. Lack OF rain at the
right time. and after the wheat CROP
was made, IL what put the crimp in
the Kansas corn crop. Still. thirds
Of q corn crop beats even the half
loaf that's so much better than. none
at all. And Kansans. as a whole
should have no complaints to make
over the crops that the state has pro.
duced this year. Suppose a gigantic
army Of q half-million or moro mer
was fighting its way through Kansas
and laying waste to everything in it,
path! An entire corn-crop failure
would be a mere basatslle Of distres'
~ comparison.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1914-08-27

[From the Philadelphia Record.1
Many a man denies his wife q lot
Of pleasure by refusing to argue with
her.
The hatterer may be more adept at
paying compliments than at paying
bills.
The people who are always finding
fault with otECr people seldom lose
their own.
Experience is q good teacher, from
whose school it ID difficult to play
truant.
When q fellow puts up a good front,
it IL just as well to look beneath the
surface.
It isn't because he II lacking in will
that many q fellow doesn't marry: it's
because of the girls won't.
Tommy-"Pop. what il hope? ~"
Tommys Pop@"Hope. my son. is q
one-card draw in the game OF life. -
After all. it may be moro agreeable
to listen to the fellow who talks
through his hat than the one who
talks through his nose.
Blobbs-''That fellow Bones would
rather fight than eat" Slobbs-"So
would I II had to take my meals in
his boarding house"
Hoax-'There isn't much room for
fellow to begin at the bottom Of the
ladder in this country" Joax-"He
can always try another cline"
Wigwag why don't you lay
something by for rainy day?" I.azi-
|cus-''What's the use! 1 can always
manage to borrow an umbrella
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1914-08-27


ned and spoke Grossly to you 1t FIRST
p,sase 1orx1ye me- thank you 20 much
IF Bobby Junior kicks up any more
shn0es tonight just ring IA and I will
come over and take my slipper to him."
ae looked admirinkly Gown into Elsa's
shall be worried In any case" he added
so II You will telephone me in the course
of half an hour
'oh! I couldn't think OF It," exclaimed
Else 1T would awaken your wife and
But have neither ono blessing nor the
other, Roscoe told her promptly. II am
lonely bachelor in my sisters home
IT will call you mp in half m hosR, -
Elsa said with soft blush and laughter
+: her eyes.
Make It twenty minutes" suggssted
Roscoe ~ he went out by thu door that
had locked Elsa into his world.
When Kitty and Bobby returned from
the theafer they pondered over the pink
in Elsa's cheeks and the sparkle in her
eyes
Taking charge of babies agrees with
you, Elsa" commented Bobby.
YES" murmured Elsa, shyly covering
her eyes. 1T does."-(Copyright. 1914. by
the Mcclure Newspaper Syndicate.)
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1914-08-27
WHAT IS TRUE LOVE.

Once into the life Of almost every
man and woman comes an experience
that makes existence divine, writes DIR.
Frank Crane in Woman's World for
September. Then human creatures live
not on the sordid earth but in heaven.
They are TRANSPORTED within, and be-
come "a II newborn. All is changed
also around them, the streets are gold.
the stars sing, the world II crystal.
This experience is called true love.
1t II a kind of madness. It is like
intoxication. 1t is a dream, a wonder.
a miracle. Common to all people. it IL
yet the most uncommon. amazing.
shattering thing known.
It in the love Of one man and one
woman. 1t is the mating instinct Of
Nature as translated into spirit quail
ties by tho deep human heart and the
majestic human brain.
The first effect is to shut out all the
rest of mankind. The two are walled
up in q world Of their own. They want
no one else. Their thoughts cannot es-
cape intense concentration upon one
another. They are monomaniacs.
To the man in true love with one
woman all other women have some
thing reDellent toward him.
Monogamy il not merely a custom
nor an artificial or economic arrange
ment. nor a state prescribed by the
authority OF religion: it is psychologi.
cal; it il . natural law Of souls: Il
win continue forever because when trul
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1914-08-27
From Other Pens
WARS EFFECTS ON co1.oN1ns.

the map Of Europe viii show
changes at the conclusion Of the pres
emit struggle. but those experts are
precipitate who are already drawing
on the Austro-Hungarian map ON the
one hand. or drawing a Germanfo
empire from the English channel to the
Adriatic on the other. Territorial
changes in Europe cannot quantita-
tiveiy measure the triumph Of the
vast changes. measured in square
miles. will take place 10 outside Of Eu-
rope. and particularly in Africa. In
this connection It is well to recall that
IN the diplomatic iIiterchanges between
Sir Edward Grey and the German
chancellor the latter was Willing to
grant as the price Of British neutrality
q promise that the territorial integrity
Of France would be respected. but that
he would make no pledges with regard
to the French colonies. France has q
colonial empire Of four and three-quar-
ter million square miles, with a native
population of more than 10000. 900.
more than nine-tenths of 1t in Africa.
Germany's colonies are more than q
million square miles, with a population
OF 1900 900, nine-tenths of it in Africa.
Little Belgium has the Congo. q solid
empire Of 100000 square miles, rich in
natural resources, with a population OF
15,00O0O0. Should the Netherlands be
drawn into the vortex. she has her rich
East Indian colonies at stake, 736, 900
square miles. with a population Of So
900. 600. And even Portugal, whose an
nouncement Of fidelity to the British
alliance must have been read by many
with a smile. has thereby thrown into
the ring nearly 100000 square miles Of
African territory with a population of
nearly 10000. 000.-New York Evening
Post.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1914-08-27
EDening Chat
On Table Talk.

The extensive use Of the weather AZ
topic Of conversation has often been
ridiculed, but to my mind 1t IL not half
SO absurd as the solemn way in which
we talk about our likes and dislikee In
the way of food.
We use the weather merely a. an
Introductory push to start the CONVEX
sational ball rolling or an q sort Of q
supplementary courtesy to our good
morning. perfectly legitimate use
weather was made-but we don't sit
down and talk about it for half an
hour at time. We don't solemnly
and at length compare notes as to our
preferences in the way of weather. our
reasons for these preferences. the pre-
ferences Of our families and relatives
and their reasons. land our experience
in various kinds of weather.
At least Intelligent people don't
But let the subject of alimentary
even the most Intelligent people will
sometimes discuss 1t with q prolixity
and solemnity that are really quite
amusing-if you can detach yourself
enough to see the absurdity of it.
Take a tableful Of well educated
worth talking about and let somebody
refuse some dish-we'u say q plate OF
nice looking strawberries.
What don't you like strawberries?
says the hostess.
The guest regretfully admits that he
does not. Goodness, like them bet
ter than any other berry," announces
another guest.
"Blackberries are my favorite," says
the hostess, but have Strawberries
more because they are more common
ly liked"
IT like Strawberries when they are
ripe like this, but I don't care much
for the half ripe berries we usually
get" contributes another guest.
mo fruit is good unless 1t 10 per
| can't imagine how much better
| oranges taste when you pick them OH
the trees. Now when was In Flor
! ida
"Blueberries will be here pretty
says the hostess nasH 5r,I
ed 1T think they make the mos
delicious pies"
Don't talk about them" pleads q
guest. with a wry face:
What. don't you like them!
Yes. but they don't like me-.
rs that 30, why they never hurt M
at all. can eat a quart at a time!'
And 20 the celebrating, stimulating
conversation goes on and on. each an
nouncing his own preference with Al
piece OF information and each paying
little. II any attention to the communi
cations of the rest OF the party.
Occasionally someone does get thu
general attention for q moment, b.
mentioning violent antipathy fol
some almost universally liked dish.
friend of mine was lucky enough t.
have had q cousin who never ate an,
fruit and who was actually s1ckened =
the smell or sight Of oranges Whe1
the subject Of likes and dislikes cAmt
up, she always contrfved to tell OF thi
antipathy, and then basked proudly il
the reflected glow s0f distinction.
No. to be sure there Is nothing on
of the way in talking about ones ali
mentary likes and sdisfikea, but the s0l
emnity with which we discuss thu
matter IL rather absurd. isn't it?
you don't think 10 now, detach your
starts and listen to It. instead Of join
ling It
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1914-08-27
Island Covered with Glass.

why! the beautiful little island has
been spoiled by the fruit growers." So
sa.d an enthusiastic lover Of nature
VIXEN he landed At Guernsey q few days
ago.
Who ever heard a lsparaging word
about he lemons, oranges, vines, figs,
olives. and flowers that abound in
Sicily? It would be considered the
height OF bad taste to object to those
delightful growths Of the Mediterranean
island. Then why complain Of the cul-
ttvatfon In Guernsey? Because it Ii
quite different. Eicily's products grow
under the canopy Of heaven. but Guern-
sey is practically one large glass house.
Nurseries. growers, and agents are the
principal features Of the place. The
names Of British -ruit and flower sales
men are emblazoned in prominent posi-
tons, and conversation in Guernsey
does NOT stray much beyond the limits
OF such subjects as deal directly with
the cultivation and marketing Of fruit
and the breeding of cattle.
1t is all very well for tie idealist to
grumble because the natural beauty Of
the place Is injured by the enormous
number OF glass houses. but this 10 q
Unitarian age. and tho output Of those
houses is NEST acceptable to England in
general and London in particular. From
the "a square miles contained in the
island some Of the choicest fruits, flow
ers. and vegetables that grace the table
are derived. Beautiful carnations,
foliage plants, including the trailing
smilax. and decorative flowers Of vari-
GUS kinds find their way from Guernsey
to the English markets. Richly favored
tomatoes. new potatoes. forced beans
and peas. melons. figs. AID grapes also
must be named among the important
contributions OF Guernsey which de-
light the epicure.-London TELEGRAPH.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1914-08-27
On the Spur
of the Moment
BIZ ROY < MoUINoN.

A Model.
She never says an unlkind word when
poor weak mortals TALL.
She peddles out no gossip OF tho neigh
borhood at all.
She hears no breath Of scandal. There
IL no doubt Of it.
And doings OF her neig61bors interest
her not q bit.
She doesn't scold her husband and shes
not one to complain.
Though the gossips hum around her,
not an item doe sh gain.
When the hcmmere are all busy, sne re-
mains discreetly mum.
Perhaps you've guessed the answer.
Yes, the lady's deaf ard dumb.
Signs of the Times.
The father OF II children has asked
the governor Of Texas to send him an
automobile, but 1t seems az though 1t
would be better for him to bear the
expenses he has than to fly to others
he knows not of.
New Jersey judge has decided that a
wife is not entitled to any pay Tor the
them don't get any.
Harry Thaw is about to get $780,
900 more from his fathers estate.
That should be good news to the law
yere.
A minister holds a MONDAY prayer
1llS0Ill6 A1 AAA 0lICCI SsCAy SSye
Right where It il needed most. too.
II Wilson wants minister IN
Greece who will not talk he should
send John Lind. John can't.
Huerta took everything with him
when he left Mexico excepting his
goat. Carranza has that.
Kermit Roosevelt is looking for a
good job. Life. after all. 10 not one
grand sweet honeymoon.
Huerta has gone to Jamaica Per-
haps he needs a little ginger by this
time.
Rodenburg. German poet. died at the
age Of So years. How could q poet
manage to live SO long?
How to. Be Happy.
Wear homemade shirts.
Try to guess who is going to be
Write short stories fo- the maya.
zines.
Try to tell the bartender how te
mix a drink.
Follow all Of the cures for rheu.
Let it be noised about that you are
going to buy an automobile.
Signs OF the Times.
Cornell has received an anonymous
donation of 100000. Being anony-
nous, it is certainly not from Rookie
Teller or Carnegie.
A pillow horse in Minnesota was
stung to death by bees. 1t seems al
though in the scheme Of life the pillow
| horse is always ''stung."
It might be well to shut the falls
off awhile so we can hear more from
the A b. c. mediation conference.
Chicago IL planning to try the com
mission form OF government. Thus fal
1t has had the commission form.
One of the Carnegie heroes tried tt
pawn his medal in New York. Medals
by the way. are not good to eat.
An OK 5000 years old has been un
| earthed in California. One Of the few
that escaped the beef trust.
Ham Lewis threatens to wear hi
pink whiskefs all summer.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1914-08-27
ODE 10 AMAN.

Backward. turn ba6kWard, o time In thy
flight;
Give M the man that - always IN right.
Sound in his morals, and always stands
pat,
And who win not b seen in . green fuzzy
hat.
Give US the young man. manly and strong.
Who seeks not an heiress to help him
along:
Who thinks he can live on the pay he
can draw
And seeks not the help Of his father-in-
law.
Oh. give us the young man. chivalrous
and true
Who can have = good woman and honor
her. too;
Who can speak Of lady. but not Of .
skirt"
And has something to do. but ogis and
1lirt.
c. A. P.
Oshkosh, Wis.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1914-08-27
Journal Entries

Too many men are measured merely
by their faults.
The true test Of your politeness Ii
how much of it you exhibit at home
An honest self-exAmination seldom
results in a high Percentage mark
The realities Of love don't often meas
ure up to what the poets paint them.
Another favorite delusion with almost
every man is that he Is terribly i'm
posed upon
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1914-08-27

Reports that Turkey IL about to
mix in the terrible European fray
sound reasonable. The only wonder
10 that Turkey has kept out Of 1t this
long. Turkeys entry is also sure to
mean that Greece will get busy. And
1t IL beginning to seem impossible that
Italy can keep out. In other words,
1T is going to develop, in truth, into .
war of all nations on the Eastern
hemisphere.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1914-08-27

Two men came running at top speed
toward the station. where the train
that would run them to town in a few
minutes was steaming ready to start.
AS they reached the station floor the
whistle sounded. and the train was of.
Gasping for breath, one said to the
other. with CHEEKY good humor:
Eth. Jim. tina didna run fast
enough
Yea. All did," Jim instantly re-
piled, but All didna start soon
enough. "-Manchester Guardian.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1914-08-27

An increase in the price of rice has
D reasonable ring to 1t, because most
of this staple IL shipped to this country
In foreign vessels, and traffic on the
seas II pretty much at standstill. But
the same does not apply to the in
crease in the prices Of the staples that
are produced in this country in more
than sufficient quantities to supply the
needs OF ftS people.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1914-08-27
HONE NEWS WHILE AWAY.

Subscribers Of the State Journal
away from homo during the summer
may have the paper mailed regularly
each day 70 any address ut tho rate
q ten cents . week or thirty cents
D month (by mail only. Address
changed ~ often as desired. While
out OF town the State Journal will BIO
% you like . daily letter from home.
Advance payment IL requested on
these short time subscriptions, to save
Sookkeeping expenses.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1914-08-27

love comes to normal people 1t II al
ways exclusive.
We may love many times. but the
great true love comes but once.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1914-08-27

In the number of words used and
discharged at random the war Of the
Significant proportions in comparison
with the political war that is to be
fought out in Kansas this fall. And
what a relief it is to the people OF
Kansas that the hurt OF words is only
q passing one.