The Washburn leader. [volume] (Washburn, McLean County, N.D.) 1890-1986, 1914-05-01

.Why don't you enter the race for
mayor? You could I've elected with .
whoop.' I
mo. Ill never enter a political Z
Of any kind. No raking up Of the past
for me-"
what have you to fear"
II was q member Of q male quartet
once."-Chicago Record-Herald..
They say that all is fair in love,
But on this saw don't bet.
A girl can be your turtle dove
And still be a brunette.
Cincinnati Enquirer
"what comes after the honeymoon
Uncle Hecky'
..The simeon usually" replied tho
erouchy old bachelor.-Puck.
II you would buy cigars for ne
Buy Just the sort you're able;
But, oh, dear lady. hear my plea:
Don't choose 'em by the label!
Detroit Free Press. "
whats the trouble with the boil
ers?"
"You see, sir, the boss told the eng1-
neer to fire the furnace, and he made an
mistake and fired the stoker. "-Balti-
more American. "
When weather chat brings general cheer
Be careful what you say.
We mustn't talk too loud for fear
Well frighten it away.
I'VE are going to name our baby
after one of his uncles. but we can't
decide which," So. M
That's easy. Which one has the
most money?'-Pittsburgh Press.
At our stately old palace Rideau
The ladies would dance the tangeau.
But by proxy the crown
Put a dainty %foot4aown
AND said with decision, "Neau. neau!'
Toronto Globe.
The class in history had the floor.
"Can any scholar tell me where the
Declaration Of independence was sign
ed?" asked the teacher.
"At de bottom, like a letter." prompt
" replied q lad.-Detroit Free Press.
A woman always has a crouch
When thinking of her letters.
But she is sure to smile the day
The postman brings her letters.
-Yonkers Statesman.
Mrs. Filthy husband very seldom
goes to his club.
Mrs. Flatt-Oh. is that so? My hus-
band goes to his club nearly every day
but you do your W cooking. don't.
you?"-Yonkers Statesman.
Il des bout all dat o kin do N
Ter hol' yo' Twin groun'
While de worl' des beats de lightnin'
De way it's spinnin' roun'! -
But all de time you's dc lucky one
Kaze you can fall OF nohow, my son!
Atlanta Constitution.
II think the world takes q man at
his own valuation"
II think you're mistaken. The Gus
tom house inspectors are as alert ~
ever. Town Topics. .,-
Said q cubist hen to herself one day,
With, q puzzled kind Of q mien.
III ! didn't know that I wal . hen
I'd think that ! was q bean!"
1t New York Sun.
.. 4af
Mrs. Hiram Often Ito applicant,-But
you have had a good many places in a
short time. Servant-Yes. ma'am; that
shows how much competition there is
to secure my services.-Boston Tran
M
will o marry met" asked the million
aire
In tones of deep distress.
Tho maiden wrote her answer on . card.
Twas simply "Y-E-$$$3$3$$!'
Florida Times. Union.
Faint heart never o. fair lady"
II detest that proverb." (
why SOP"
Il consider it u slap at vs. brp9ettelE
kansas City Journal. .aS.s 81
! .-sass-s ,..,sS- .--- -,---e----- ~. 81
Get out ana work: your talents use:
Live life while life 10 sweet,
For those who wait for dead mems shoes /
Will often get cold feet.
San Francisco Chronicle
willie-Paw, what IL meant BY say
Ing that q girl has an arch look?
Paw-It means that she IL bowleg-
ged, my son.-Cincinnad Enquirer.
suppose that my heart should be Joyous