The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1914-05-29
joke ON MR..b|RYAN
Foreign Diplomats Are Finding
Amusement 1T His Expense
Owing to Manner in Which
Huerta Has Outwitted Him.
(By Alfred Henry Lewis. }


Washington. May 29.-There IL q
dry, satirical grin ripping the faces
Of our European legations. The
aforesaid dry grin is leveled at Mr..
Wilson and Mr.. Bryan. No sound of
laughter bears it company, for 1t Is
undiplomatic to laugh otherwise than
inwardly. The alien glee is born of
this: While we took possession OF Vera
Cruz upon the reason stated-that the
flag had been scorned, in the arrested
persons of eight marines-in actual
truth our Vera Cruz occupation was
merely to get between Huerta and q
German ship upon its way with a
hold full of rifles and cartridges. Our
purpose was to hold the Vera Cruz
custom house and so head off that
consignment of German arms.
We took the custom house: we cork
ed up the Mexican bottle against those
Teutonic guns. Also both Mr.. Wilson
and Mr.. Bryan have been wont pri-
vately to boast of their far seeing in
telligence in so. doing:
Having Vera Cruz. Mr.. Wilson and
Mr.. Bryan began to arrange hot air
mediation at Niagara Falls. The A. B.
G. powers were invited to tender
their good Offices which was prompt
" done by the obliging A. B. C.'s.
They had nothing else to do and
might as well be. considering the falls
from the cool corners OF the clifton
x4&1fOnOaChSs
Agreeing to Mr.. Wilson's and Mr..
Bryan's suggestion that they "medi-
ate." the A. b. C.'s said that in order
that an things be shipshape and bris-
tol-faShion, both Huerta and the Will
son-Bryan combination must consent
to q cessation Of hostilities. This was
to continue until mediation
achieved q triumph or ran helplessly
ashore.
what harm in that? Moreover, 1t
was the regular mediatory thing to
do. Mr.. Wilson and Mr.. Bryan eager
1y consented. Huerta, with a sinister
deer, also came under those truce
conditions.
The News from Puerto Mexico.
Now comes a disquieting cable
word from Puerto Mexico that two
cargoes Of arms have been put ashore
from German ships for Huerta.
Mr.. Bryan. when the word reached
him, could hardly credit his long, SEN
sitive ears. He was not at the state
being abroad upon certain chautau-
qua details. 1t was understood that
there had been here some notion OF
following Mr.. Bryan's act with a soft
shoe buck instead OF the Swiss bell
ringers, and Mr.. Bryan preferred the
bell ringers as more refined. He got
back to his desk. however, in time to
be told that those shiploads Of Ger
man arms had been put ashore.
Every thought of buck dancers and
bell ringers vanished from Mr.. Bry-
ans capacious mind.
What" he cried, ''those arms
landed?'
Then ensued profound Bryan silence
The silence became even more pro-
found, not to say resentful. when he
was told, by one learned ip diplomacy
and the laws Of nations, that. having
h<, tvVy To tp,ro 7{vVo
the hot air developments at Niagara
the Germans had a right to land the
arms. We could only look peacefully
and helplessly on. Our hands were
tied by hot air mediatory bonds.
1t is understood that Huerta-even
saddle colored features with a Monte
Zumain grin. Also Mr.. Wilson and Mr.
Bryan. and per incident the country
are being laughed at and sneered at all
along the legation line.
The Shrewd Mr.. Huerta.
The diplomats say that Huerta has
again, for perhaps the fourth time, out
By way of rubbing it in, the suave
Huerta gives insolent notice that he
hasn't fled and has not abdicated. and
entertains no thought Of doing either
At which Mr.. Bryan is supposed to
have exclaimed and Mr.. Wilson to have
echoed the exclamation: How long
oh Lord. how longv
Don't print my name,' said a sena-
tor, for the administration makes g
speciality Of being thin skinned and OBJ.
5ects to even kindliest criticism.
The trouble with Mr.. Wilson is he.
visionary and dreams dreams. He In
eists and persists in dealing with the
Mexican people upon the assumption
that they are what they ought to b.
and not what they are.''