davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington herald., 1914-01-20

A Tarrytown man, carrying hen in
a basket, boarded street car and found
himself penniless. The hen obligingly
laid an egg, which the conductor &C
cepted as fare. Commuters between
Tarrytown and New York may soon be
leading ostriches.
The Washington herald., 1914-01-20
THE GOLDEN TREASURY.
tOoprisht.(Mkl

Take my possessions IL you will.
Take every one you find, and still
I'll smile
The while.
For of my stores the richer part
Are those so deep within my heart
No Creditor can hope to pry
Into that Golden Treasury.
The Washington herald., 1914-01-20

Some people just can't help being
pcssimists. Here, for instance, is the
fellow who says the mild winter will
mean higher prices for ice next sum-
mer.
The Washington herald., 1914-01-20

The governor of South Carolina and
the governor of North Carolina are
not on visiting terms now, and so the
governor of South Carolina just said
it to himself.
The Washington herald., 1914-01-20

The Anti-Cigarctte League has $1,000
members, but you must remember that
there are more than 100000 persons
in this country.
The Washington herald., 1914-01-20

No matter how honest man may
be. people will always look upon him
with suspicion if he has two umbrellas.
The Washington herald., 1914-01-20

The greatest trouble abou. the mod
ern dance is that just as you learn 1t
it goes out of style and you have to
learn another one.
The Washington herald., 1914-01-20

A girl gets married because she
wants to, and a man gets married be-
cause she wants him to. That's the
difference.
The Washington herald., 1914-01-20

They say truth lies at the bottom of
well. And some people we know
never clean out their wells.
The Washington herald., 1914-01-20

When mans wife paints we sup
pose it is correct to say that he is we'd
ded to his art
The Washington herald., 1914-01-20

The assistant cook at the White
House got married the other day. No
cards.
The Washington herald., 1914-01-20

A dairy company in Maryland has
failed. Too much watered stock caused
the trouble, we understand.
The Washington herald., 1914-01-20

A second-class man may go up, but
he can't stay up.
The Washington herald., 1914-01-20

Every Mexican belongs to the Sons
of the Revolution.
The Washington herald., 1914-01-20
The Reason.

Prom Judge.
TO be a man, One dress suit lasts for
years and years. and a woman must
have a new gown for every party"
That's why one dress suit lasts a man
for years and years"
The Washington herald., 1914-01-20
Careful shopper.

Prom the Torouto Mail and Empire.
"Ain't you rather young to be left
in charge of a drug store?"
Perhaps: what can ! do for your"
DO your employers know it's dan
gerous to leave a mere boy like you
in charge OF such a placer"
Il am competent to serve you.
madam. II you will state your wants"
Don't they know you might poison
some one?'
what can I do for your
II think I better go to the store
down the street"
81 can serve you just as well as
they can, and as cheaply."
well. you may give me a e-ccnt
stamp. but II doesn't look right"
The Washington herald., 1914-01-20

The debt of gratitude is seldom
liquidated.
The Washington herald., 1914-01-20
TUESDAY. JANUARY 20. 1914

The American eagle no longer
screams. 1t COOS.
The Washington herald., 1914-01-20
Morning Smiles.
In England.

FIom It'll -Bitk
her-elect-well. doctor?
Physician--A girl.
Grandmother-elect Ito servant)-
Mary. hang a Votes for Women card
at the window.
The Washington herald., 1914-01-20
A Line o Cheer Each Day o
tn Year.

written expressly for The Herald.)
BY JOHN KENDRICk BANGS.
The Washington herald., 1914-01-20
Matter of Ancestors.

From the Boston Transcript.
Mrs. Hightone-Yes. my husband
comes OF a noble family. His ances-
tors won great renown on the tented
field.
Mrs. wibble-How odd, My hus-
bands people were in the circus busi-
ness, too.
Scnre Mt Two Things.
From Jud=e.
Purchaser-And will he scare at
anything?
Farmer-M' friend. this hoss Ia jst
afraid o. two things: That he won't
get enough to eat. an that he won't
hear when i say whoa"
The Washington herald., 1914-01-20
The NuIctary.

Prom the Buffalo Express.
The Mexican refugee approached the
negro driver of commisary wagon.
Are you connected with the United
States military establishment he
asked politely.
mo, sah." replied the driver. "Dis
heah outfit am paht OBJ de United
States muletary establishment
The Washington herald., 1914-01-20
One Look Enough.

One Look Enough.
ffom PeATscns Weekly.
A poor. half-fed. shrinking German
peddler raped timidly. Mrs. Norman.
whose temper that day was bad. fung
open the kitchen door. and glowered
down at him.
Did ye wish to see meT she de-
manded in threatening tones.
The man backed a few steps
Veil. IL I did" he assured her with
an apologetic grin, Il got my wish.
Thank you"'
The Washington herald., 1914-01-20
No Job for Him.

No Job for Him.
Frum Harper's wcekly-
The spring had brought out the us
ual crop of listless wanderers.
Want help do your said the pros
porous looking party who had been
applied TO for assistance by one OF
these. You're a husky looking beg
gar. ] must say. Why don't you
work."
My business amt any good at dis
season." said Dusty
What is your business" said the
prosperous looking party.
I'm a professional tobogganist." said
Dusty.
The Washington herald., 1914-01-20

From the Rocky Mountain News.
Il don't see any sense in referring
to the wisdom of Solomon" said the
man smartly. He had 1000 wives"
Yes" answered the woman tartly.
he learned his wisdom from them"
The Washington herald., 1914-01-20
by FRED g. KELLY

Congressman Edward W. Townsend. o
New Jersey. author Of ''Chimmie Fad
den," has little time for literary en-
deavor any more. now that he Is states
man. and contents himself with dashin.
or an occasional scenario for MOVING
pictures.
The Washington herald., 1914-01-20

Indiana has produced more first
class ond-grade men than any State
In the Union" remarked Vice President
Marshall recently. and I'm one OF
them"
Copyright. 1914. by Fred c. Kelly. All rights
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-01-24
CITY WILL FIGHT
JUDGES DECISION
IN TICKET ORDER

immediate
missions ruling order the Puget Sound Traction Light
Judge mtehe decision that the travelling public will have
$4,000
company because they cannot conveniently buy tckets
II
said,
would a substantial continuous company"
The commissions evidently
Of the
mutation tickets" said the written
And the holds that Of public
before H.. involved m o
Whether order
reaui o tickets rules
city
obligation the rate
Of
said Pierce only whether company eou
by
public commission order by con
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-01-24

West Seattle citizens are np In
arms against the city water depart
ment aud are making life-sized
roar over the fac, that for two DAYS
they have been without water.
AND WITHOUT NOTIFICATION
FROM THE DEPARTMENT
THAT THE SUPPLY WAS TO BE
OFF.
The motors AT the West Seattle
humping station burned ou'. ac-
20 city water officials, aud
caused the shutdown. The damage
has been repaired and water will
he furnished today
schools IN the water famine dis
trict we're closed yesterday.
why. everybody knows why
the water was shut off," said
a department official. The
West Seattle folks have all
been calling up the office here
and we told them what caused
the trouble"
\ reasonable explanation, per
hans Still. West Seattle folks are
maj
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-01-24
Mexican REFUGEE
IN SEATTLE COURT

A Mexican soldier boy AT ~, Per.
cy Pamchilon. follower of Gen.
villa. fleeing to the United states
after his home and family were de.
stroyed in the fierce fighting in the
1uarez district six months ago. was
the central figure IN the prisoners
dock today before Superior Judge
Mackintosh
He admitted the charge Of steal.
ing q loaf of bread one night when
hunger drove him TO commit crime,
but his straightforward story and
frankness. added to the romance
Of bis life. won him friends on the
prosecutor STAFF
And Percy will not 20 tn the re.
formatory
This boy has confessed that he
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-01-24

hood Of Il fills me with ire
From time immemorial X has
been the poor mans inalionahla
and exclusive right to hayo the
itch
The rich man has his gout Did
van ever hear OF briek-layers
helper having the gout7 For that
matter IL is only In recent years
that appendicitis has become so
popularired aA to be within, the
reach of all
once had a snobbish acauaint
ance who. after an operation for
appendicitis. VAS AT pains "a let
me know he couldn't associate with
me on terms OF equality because I
still carried my appendix around
with me.
ON. would not be surprised 10
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-01-24
Two MORE GIRLS
learn CITY LIFE

found them there the next morn
ing
Atty. Jesse Frye. for Knapp. ex.
planned that his client had been
employed in large lumber mill at
Anacortos. where he showed such
marked ability that he was promot.
cd and brought 10 the head office
In Seattle. where II was thought he
would have larger scope for his
rather extraordinary talents.
He arrived in the city" said the
attorney. at in tho afternoon.
and was arrested az 10 next morn
ing.
Judge Ffater fined Knapp 800.
remarlging that. being such a
bright Young man. ne would prob
ably be more careful In the future.
Crawford was employed at the
Isis moving picture theatre.
The girls are detained by the po-
lice
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-01-24

learn that Harry whitney Treat
had the gout. lie has twenty mil
lion dollars While have not
sounded him on the subject. !
imagine he would regard 1, as an
lmpudent presumption for me. who
am worth at the moment 90 cents
(thongh this ~ payday. heaven be
,hankcdi to have the goui
do no, say that Treat has the
itch. do no, know
The point | am trsIne TO make Is
inat see In this contraction OF the
itch by society folks the thin enter
ING wedge. an insidious and sneak.
Ing encroachment upon the eNclus.
i've right 10 scratch OF the sturdy
but impoverished class to which I
belong
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-01-24
PROSPECTS FOR
BUSINESS GOOD,
SAYS REDFIELD

NEW HAVEN. Conn. Jan. "a
Secretary of Commerce Redfield. ad'
dressing the Chamber of Commerce
here today. roundly denounced the
prophets of evil. who. for political
purposes. preach national pain.
lie admitted that the Balkan war
and currency changes had given
cause for business hesitation, but
now. he said. they were all over.
Besides. he added. the trade depres-
sion in the United states at its
worst was less than that which pre-
vailed abroad
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-01-24

Two more country girls have
ssen ~vised ~" by a short course
% Seattle night life.
peion Knapp. aged "a. pleaded
sa'lty this morning before Judge
rfstes to contributing to the de-
hnquency Of Florence
-, . f5-year-old girl living at
Ioeef, between Seattle and Ta-
coma. on the interurban line.
=. VI. Crawford, a moylnR.picture
eharse.
= Attend Public Dance
florence aud Ethel -. Ig.
sms % Seattle on a recent satuf.
ana went 10 public dance
- snere they met Knapp and
ao'osf man who escorted them to
~ interurban depot While they
ue waiting for the last car fire
var. gu" i'i
= me crowd at the fire. they met
.s-lofd. a stranger to them. for
A'" Ethel shook her escort.
Miss Last Car Home
AZ. ne girls having missed the last
u Z, ,.'swiord and Knapp took them
sh.s ~ Wiltshire hotel. Seventh av..
- oravford lived. The police
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-01-24
SEATTLE SOCIETY HAS The ITCH!

harmless malsdy. which hah as.
sumea the proportions OF an epi,
d-mie. Ia that 1, attacks persons
whose personal habits areas clean.
ly as their lives are pure
II is induced. this doctor tells
Us. by a condition bf hyper.acidity
That Is, II you indulge In rich WING
and heavy foods and do not exer
else YOU are practically inviting
this snobhlsh and sychophantic
Itch germ To- lodge on YOU and stick.
bankers get Il. So do men OF
leisure. For ladies' who breakfast
In bed and rise at noon ther. is
scarcely any escape.
In Its manifestations II Is not
unlike the plebeian itch that you
and | know so we'll
For reason which any sensitiy.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-01-24

stole loaf OF bread and search
light from the store Of Charles
Jacobson at Woodinville." said Dep.
uty Prosecutor Steele lie looks
like an honest boy and has told al
honest story. frankly admitting his
fault / recommended that sen.
tence he stayed until we can find
a sponsor for him aud place him In
n good home.
Il like the United states. but
think I like Mexico better" said
the boy to star reporter 1t got
pretty fierce down there during tho
fighting and | ran one day when
got scared The bullets We're fly
ing everywhere. just lost my
head And aftev ! crossed the line
IL seemed 80 good to he away from
II all that just kept on going
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-01-24

person will understand II Is impos.
sible to even guess at the extent
of the epidemic. There Ia an odinm
attaching To the itch
One scratches furtlvely In exclu.
sive circles. not openly and shame.
lessly as ls the naive practice Of
the hnl.polloi
The physician already quoted
tells me S,ss every member OF
Capitol Hili fsmliy--'a,her.
mother, skaters. brothers--esme
20 him separately, secretly, and
In great perturbation to f,nd
out what the trouble was.
IL Itch. then. 10 becom. a fash
ionahla malady7
Mere contemplation OF the likell
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-01-24
NO VOTE YET CUT DOWN TERM

J. IT, Reno, the 5i.year-old North.
ern Pacific conductor. who was tai.
en- To Walla Walla today to besin
a sentence of one year to 20 for
forging sS2 check. will find A
surprise waiting for him
Superior Judge Macintosh has
reduced the minimum sentence 10
six months
lhe case was unusual" said
Judge Macintosh. Il would sign
an application for his pardon. II II
were presented to me-"
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-01-24

WASHINGTON. u c. Jan. "a
The final vote on the Alaska Rail-
way bill is not expected until late
this afternoon. The senate yester.
day. by vote of a To H. voted
for the amendment to empower
the president to lease the railway
II he should see III to do SO. Sen
ator PoindeXter OF Washington had
made strong plea 10 have the gov
ernmont directly operate the line.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-01-24
CHILDREN ASK FOR
AN OPEN-AIR RINK

An open.air cement roller
skating rink on the Rainier
Beach playfield Is desired by
pupils Of the Emerson school.
A petition sent 20 the park
board yesterday was submitted
TO superintendent j. W. Thomp-
son for an estimate OF cost.
Residents Of Northeast Seat
tie appeared befoee the park
board TO request that Ger line
be Immediately constructed
into that district, provided a
bridge could be secured for 18th
av. NJ. &.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-01-24
WEST SEATTLE
water IS OFF,;
SCHOOLS CLOSE

Robbed and st on fire early
this morning. J. e. oirard's gro.
eery store. at California av. and
w. Myrtle ST. suffered $500 dau-
aae. There was no water. Fire
men used chemicals to fight the
flames.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-01-24
FRISCO ROCKED BY
TWO EARTHQUAKES

SAN FRANCISCO, Jan. ga
Two earthquake shocks---the
first slight and the second de-
cldedly seVere--wero felt here
about 7:45 last evening.
II was too early for evening
crowds to have gathered gen.
orally. but In continuous per
formanoe theatres, cafes and
dance halls there were several
near panics. women screaming.
few falnting, and In some In
stances entire gatherings run
ming into the street.
No damage was done.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-01-24
By Fred L. Boalt

society has the itch,
4 seattle physician. who has
ssahiensbls practice. admitted
n M to-day that many of his
pssisets have u
-ouG- No hasssnea 90 add.
-,Asseh Itch. Il 10 not regular
~. We doctors are puxxled to
elsssify H."
n IL then. suggested. sort OF
/ sIcrisled Itch"
i, would be more accurate. per
NM said the physician. TO call
4 ~ exclusive And discriminating
iltA"
N cd thing about the spread OF
- curious and irritating. but
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-01-24
AUTO THIEF TO co
TO PENITENTIARY

A. a warning to automobile
thieves. Superior Judge Macintosh
senteBced l.. T. Romer to six
months to 20 years In the Walla
Walla prison this morning on an
auto theft charge Romer stole
the machine OF Dr Peregriue
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-01-24

BOMB! BOOM |!

GLASGOW. Jan. ei-Thc build.
ings. at Kobble Palace botanical
gardens were wrecked. supposedly
by suffraget bomb. today Many
valuable plants were destroyed. A
watchman had previously cxtin-
guished the fuse on one bomb. but
either overlooked second one or
~ was planted later
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-01-24
MUNICIPAL LEAGUE
FOR CUSHMAN SITE,

Nr humcpa OF Immediately
"s lasting our hours
j. D. Ross Engineer A. H. Dmcck and John
..shman
the Seattle Electric Co Of the Chamber Of
soe determined fight for They have recently
In the The discussion lasted until midnight
afobs chairman which
= '"e purchase Of the site.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-01-24
TRIES TO GET BOND

Harry ". Boswell. arrested In
connection with she death of Miss
Beryl Bill. killed by his auto. plead
ed not guilty TO manslauEhter
charge today before Superior Judge
Macintosh Tie ~ making an at-
tempt to raise $4,000 bond.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-01-24
PLEADS NOT GUILTY

O. NJ. Nowall. arrested by orr.
GERS Collins and Jones, charged
with kidnapping a young married
woman, entered plea of not guilty
when arraigned today before Judge
Macintosh.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-01-24
ARREST TEAMSTER

Jack Smith. -. said 10 be team
ster. Is under arrest. charged With
cutting harness from Sound
Transfer Go. team yesterday at
Fourth ay. and Union Al
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-01-24
CAN'T RAISE HER

PLYMOUTH. Jan. 2i.--Attempts
To raise the sunken Al had TO be
abandoned temporarily today on ac.
count OF ficrcc ga1e
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-01-24

The annual report OF the Ladies'
Montefiore Aid society. OF which
Mrs. !. S. Kane is secretary. shows
the membership hps increased to
2b3
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-01-24

db
Wmmdd the compen saion nat the %
will not of law" of hmsto
hinhn
and We the
mk a "cod dpropohio nof law
A
Then FIND O'CLOCK
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-01-24
FJUST A COLD PROPOSITION OF LAW

70 e in
don't
Weir oaskng for b IA the rcent icke o several
ey
come o
But is pm it
of civic vcandecon and pi questions dbyhe mcou
N alager m dt III
railway
bu onerem
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-01-24
COTTMAN RETIRED

REMERTON. Wash. Jan.
2a.--With the announcement
that Rear Admiral Cottman,
comm ander OF the Puget Sound
Navy Yard, will retire from ao.
tive service February 10. on ac.
count OF age, arrangements have
been made by the Bremerton
Commercial club for a farewell
banquet in honor Of the admiral
and Mrs. Cottman on Janu-
ary 20.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-01-24

A farewell party Will be given In
the old Y. w e. A building. Fourth
nv. aud Seneca ST.. Thursday night
By the girls of the Federated Clubs
II the association
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1914-01-26
THE UNITED STATES
AND TEE MIX ADO.

The Japanese question seems hare
to Gown. The chronic issue be
tween the United States and Nippor
on the Californian alien law is AGAR
causing some people uneasincss aaC
adding prestige to the advocates. OF
an increased navy. Like other nation.
al epidcmics, it Will nave its nine
days course and give way to Other
more important matters.
During the past few days some
newspapers, ever on tie alert for Tic
sensational, have seize certain
words of japanese diplomats and by
the aid of their powerful miscropc,
have made mountains out Of molchils
japan has no intention Of attacking
this country, although such posi-,
bility seems to disturb the dreams
Of some.
Baron Maxine, the japanese for
aign minister, has made 4 supplement
tary statement to the japanese par.
lEmcnt TO show that. according I;
the Japanese understanding, there i:
perfect harmony and purpose be
tween the United States ard Japan il
negotiations to settle the Califorri:
land legislation question.
Accordi;;g to the transcript of hi:
remarks, mae public by the Japan
csc embassy in Washington, the min
lister Said
at is the purpose of the imperia
government to settle the question il
as advantageous manner as possible
and | believe the American govern
ment is taking measures Of iNvcsti
CATION looking to u settlement ~
the most just methods.
The statement was aaie by Baro:
Maxine IN 'snswer to formal In
terpellation apparently framed to dis
sipatc Impressions possibly created by
previous intimations that Japan re-
scented the failure Of the United
States to reply to the last note in re
gard to the California situation.
Jar3n is believed to desire ne"
treaty specifically recognizing the
right Of japanese in the United
States TO hold and lease real prop
crty on equal terms with other for
cigners. Such treaty VI lnvall-
date the California law ynG similar
state lcg!s alton, but whether the Sen
ate would gatiry convention Of rhi'
character even if presented, forms
another angle 10 the problem.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1914-01-26
Washington Southern Ry.

Schedule in effect January 5, 1914.
For Washington and points north
daily at 7:03 Q. NJ, S.23, S.3l. 1909
1884 a. m, 1901, 2:30 (throush train
for New Ierk, via ?. r. R. 6:i9
5:18. 11:33 p. m, week days at G:OI
P. NJ, Sundays only 1907 P. NJ
For fredericksburg, Richmond, ane
points south at Asst, 1853. (locaD sno
l0:l7 a. M, 1916, 3:22 5:17 Qocal)
5:27, 9:57, 1907 p. m, daily.
Accommodate for Fredericksburg
at Ills m, daily except Saturday
when train leaves 2:19 pm. This tram
runs through to Milford except Sat-
urdays ard Sundays.
NOTf:-Times OF arrival and de-
parture and connections not gusfan-
esrd.
p. r. TAYLOR, Traffic. Mgr
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1914-01-26
HANGS SELF TO ESCAPE TRIAL
Eo~cph Ardzinski Was Charged Wa
Assaulting Girl.


Baltimore, Md, Jan. 26.-Prefer-
Ing cath to defending himself from
serious accusation made against him
BY young girl, Joseph Ardzinski.
48 years old, ended his life by hang
ing hin, self 10 bed post in his room
At 1913 Eastern Avenue Saturday
= 1t. Two weeks ago Ardzniski
was ARRESTED on a warrant charging
hia with assaulting Miss Mary Co
'ewski, 1920 Thames street.
Re vas given a preliminary hear
im.c and was released on bail for
.o"rt. Three days ago he was indict-
ID by The grand jury AM his trial
was scheduled for Thursday. Ardzn-
Ski. after his Indictment went among
iis friends seeing information about
"o&rt piece lure.
According to his wife, Mrs. Jose
ol:ine A:zdnski, her husband had been
Respondent since his indictmen. lie
!e Jared that he was innocent. Mrs.
Ardzinsl:i went to her husbands room
at midnight SATURDAY and found him
lcad win the rope about his neck.