The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1914-07-18
On the Spur
Of the Moment

me Dsening Dialogne.
locked the front door,
Yes.
Put the cat out7
Have you wound tho clock9
Yes.
Have you been down cellar to smell
for gas?
Yea
Yes.
Have you brought in the hammock?
Yes.
Have you looked under the daven-
port for burglars?
Yes
Yes.
Have you fastened all the windows?
Yes.
Have you 1ixed some ice water.
Yes.
Well. then why don't you come to
bed? What have you been doing all
this time, anyhow?
Essay ON the Barber Pole.
We see the barber pole and we know
tt u advertising q business, but little
90 We know what the stripes signify.
In the early days BARRIERS did the bleed
ing Tor the community and surgeons
were not as plentiful as now. The drst
thing thought necessary way down to
the time of George Washington's
death. was that any patient should be
bled: Tap him and take a few ounces
weak he may be. When Washington
was at the last gap the fools bled
him. Well. the red stripes on the bar
Der pole meant the red ribbon band
ages bound over the wounds caused by
bleeding people. That's all. When
they got through with a plethoric man.
OF full habit, and had tapped him like
a hard maple tree in March, he was
patched up and bandaged till his arms,
legs and trunk looked like q much gar
tered leg.
It may be well to add that the bar
bers are still bleeding men. but in an
other way.
A "Wise'' Man.
git ahead and make a lot OF money
in this world without KNOWN q durn
thing about algebra or geometry.
There amt no faith that equals that
OF the Teller who plants a kitchen gar
den and hopes to save a lot OF money
by 1t.
When Teller stops to consider that
there IL enough wire in a hoop-skirt to
fence 40-acre lot. it seems as though
It's going to be purity expensive to have
'em come back in style.
A Teller who has got a poker face is
business way.
Rem Binks. our versatile and con-
genial station agent down to the rail-
rud deppO, has got a new way to make
tho trains stop at this point and take
ON passengers once a month. He ears
n q <appt vafx Il - l.
Sure Signs.
There was q man in our town.
And he was wOndrous wise;
He bought his wife new silk gown,
In way Of q surprise.
He paid just $19.9S.
He told his wife in glee.
She looked at him in deep disgust,
And then she said, said she:
II could have bought that dress down
town
For 1882.
Why don't you read the ads, my dear,
As really wise men do?"
Uncle Abner.
II you forget to hand the waiter q
little something it is a sure sign that
YOU are going to have little soup
down the back Of your neck the next
time you call.
II you see a man paving around
with his front hoof like a boss trying
to find something to put it on, it is q
sign that he often dallies in front of
the polished mahogany.
If your wife begins early in the
morning to pay you compliments and
forgets to hand you one for getting
home late the night before. 1t is a sign
that she is going to have a new hat
If you see particular friend OF yours
sailing along in your direction in q new
automobile, it is a sure sign that he il
not going to ask you to jump in and
have a ride.
Few millionaires' daughters seem to
be original at all Most of them elope
| with their fathers chauffeurs.
There should be some hot lighting in
the Mexican state Of Tobasco.