The Washington herald., 1914-04-12

the imposing title of bulldog" Gist
Blair is secretary and treasurer. Lawyer
Bailey is supposed to be the presiding of.
| hcer, and Mr.. Blair. of course, is sup.
posed to handle the correspondence and
the funds Of the club, but the function OF
man with the title of bulldog will re-
| main a mystery. probably for aye or until
some member leaks"
"Inhuences- Are NebuIous.
Certain prominent influences are al
legged to govern the society. These "cer-
tain prominent influences" however, rep
resent to the mind of the average Wash
| ingtonian a force as vague and nebulous
| as that supposed to dictate the appoint
ments of the United States Marine Corps.
or the force that was alleged TO dictate
the destines of Marine Corps officers.
Incidentally. the club has no door bell,
and the telephone company has never re-
ceived an order to install its service.
Members are not disposed to use the tel
ephone because it was not installed at
the time of the clubs formation. The
door bellis also regarded as a superfiuity
because, IL you are a member. you will
walk in, and II you are not, you can't
disturb those who are.
Those who have seen the inside Of the
Alibi clubhouse say il is "cluttered'
with all sorts of impedimenta. 1t would
seem likely that certain amount of
clutter" was necessary to coincide with
the temperament of the Alibi Club.
From one wall hangs a weird and gro
tesque assortment of pots and pans and
mugs and kettles. Other implements of
gastronomy are seen dangling elsewhere.
Above this heterogeneous assortment
hangs strings of dried peppers. onions,
hops. and, perhaps, here and there, a
smoked ham.
TnblecIoth ScOrncd.
Scrambled eggs and sausage is the con-
ventional supper of the club. The cook
is not A Henri or a Jules. In all proba-
bility. he's a member of the club. with an
apron tied about his neck to keep the
spatter from his clothes. Sausage and
bacon is not despised as an article OF
diet, but a petit pois concoction or a
dish with the word au gratin never yet
found its way to the board of the Alibi
Club.
This supper. whatever it may be. is al
ways served on the kitchen table. which.
under all circumstances. is totally inno-
cent OF a tablecloth.
In the center Of the kitchen table re-
poses a big dish OF artificial fruit. One
of the rites OF the club is to carefully dust
the artificial fruit before sitting down
to meals.
An occasional boast by an Alibi Club
member is heard. but boasts are frowned
down. The chief boast is hat any num-
ber of distinguished statesmen. diplo-
mats, authors, poets, singers. and artists
have scrambled eggs and cooked sausage
in the kitchen of the Alibi Club.
The Devil-It Is.
The walls are covered with autographs,
cartoons. and photographs. A famous
artist once painted a faithful likeness in
colors of the devil, on the doors In the
lower hall. The stranger to the club
comes upon the painting with a shock.
the effect having been carefully worked
out by the artist
Foliage. real and unreal decorates the
ca-droom on the second floor. Grapevines,
with imitation grapes, festoon the wall. |
Palms, grasses, a sheaf OF wheat corn |
stalks, and other evidence Of rustic life |
are TO be found there hoe, a rake, a !
spade or two. and sickles carry out the |
rest of the effect
Put membership,
Try finding the Golden Fleece or rails
ing the Titanic-it's easier.