davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-03-19

tightly at the top, and rests agains,
the cleats at the bottom, SO cannot be
pushed outward. Bait with carrot or
apple.
Hang the bait On the back end of
the box. The door is made of wire
bent up and down and fastened with
staples. Have enough space between
the trigger and the bait for the rab-
bit to have to push it to get to the
bait. then the door falls and the rab-
bit is caught.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-03-19
Greater New York.

The population of Greater New York
is estimated by the health department
at 5,476,966 on January l, 1914. Ac-
cording to the same authority the pop
ulation Of the boroughs is as follows:
Manhattan, 2,513,060; the Bronx, 612,-
294; Brooklyn, 1,880,713; Queens, 373,-
Ala; Richmond, 97,515. Not yet, how
ever, has Greater New York caught up
with London. The British metropolis
still leads the big Yankee town by
some 100000
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-03-19
His Chance at Last,

The busybody was circulating a pc
tition calling upon the powers that
be to abolish something or other.
ut will be presented at the next
meeting" he said, "and a copy Of it
will be printed in all the papers"
The struggling young author made
haste to sign.
What's it all about?" asked a
friend
ooh, don't know" said the strug-
Cling young author, but I couldn't
resist the temptation to see my name
signed to something that will appear
in print. Judge.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-03-19

11e'' T. i1eS1oP boxes of Dodds
Kidney Pills the swelling disappear,
ed and he felt himself again. He says
he has been benefited and blessed by
the use of Dodds Kidney Pills. Sew
eral months later he wrote: I have
not changed my faith in your remedy
since the above statement was author
lied. Correspond with Rev. E. Hes
Iop about this wonderful remedy.
Dodds Kidney Pills, SOC. per box at
your dealer or Dodds Medicine Co.,
Buffalo, n. Y. Write for Household
Hints, also music of National Anthem
English and German words) and re-
cipes for dainty dishes. All 8 sent free.
Adv.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-03-19
Weak Man.

At a New Year eve supper at the
Players club in New York, Witter
Bynner, sonneteer, remarked:
"A New Year resolution is the only
thing on earth that is stronger at
birth than at any time"
At this witticism the eyes of Butler
Glaenzer, essayist and critic, snapped
behind the Iustrous pince-nez, and Mr..
Glaenzer said in his calm, fluent
voice:
And of New Year resolutions,
above all other things, it is true that
the good die young"
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-03-19
Squeeze Out Grubs.

The backs of the cattle are filled
with grubs or MARBLES" as usual, be-
cause everybody didn't squeeze them
out last spring and kill them. Enlarge
the openings in the skin, if necessary,
squeeze on the grubs and kill them.
If every cattle owner did this the pest
would be exterminated, our cattle
saved annoyance by the flies in sum
mer and the ''grubs'' in winter and
spring and the hides would be worth
more
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-03-19
Grub Out Briers.

Let US insist on the grubbing out
Of the brush and briers from the pas
ture, or the enclosure called a pasture,
during the idle days between now and
the opening of spring work. Pasture
grasses cannot grow where non-pas-
ture plants already have possession of
the land. There is no part Of the farm
that will pay more for a little atten-
ton this spring than will the pas
tire
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-03-19

hams Vegetable Compound I improved
rapidly and today am well woman. I
cannot tell you how happy I feel and
cannot say too much for your Compound.
Would not be without it in the house if
it cost three times the amount. Mrs.
CHAs. CHAPMAN, r. F. D. No. z, Belle
v71e Ohio.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-03-19
HOW TO MAKE RABBIT TRAP
Complete Directions With Illustration
Given HereWith-Use a Carrot or
Apple for Bait.

A is the trap complete, showing the
inner workings of the wire door and
trigger.
B is the top before it is nailed on
and is shown turned over-upside
down. The wire door is turned up
against the top and the trigger pushed
forward to catch the door. The door
and trigger should be fitted to the top
before it is nailed on.
G shows the door, which, loosed
from the trigger, falls behind the rab-
bit as he enters the trap, and is hung
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-03-19

If it we're not for hog cholera pork
raisers would be living in the lap of
luxury. The time will come when
there will be no more excuse for hog
cholera than for the human cholera
that until a century or so ago periodi-
caIly devastated Europe and America.
Both are essentially filth diseases.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-03-19

You would scarcely believe" said
Silas, what an effect vision at dis
lance has on sex. Last summer
went to Boston with my two uncles
and we visited Bunker Hill monu-
ment. They were afraid to go up it,
but l did SO while they waited be-
low. When l got to the top and
looked down, III be blowed if my
uncles didn't look just like ants"
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-03-19
a Frank Talk.

"Wombat, l have always been a true
friend to you. have spoken nicely
of you behind your back as we'll as to
your face. And yet you have always
been suspicious of me-"
Il admit it, old chap. You act so
different from my other friends that
I have never known what to make
of you"
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-03-19
a New Herr

Auttsr-The hero of my book is the
sort 81 a fellow who wears his bust
ness quit TO a dance.
.>rthur-What is he-an eccentric
artist?
Authorize; he's waiter-YaIe
Record.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-03-19
The Law of Chance.

May Kissam-I'm afraid papa would
make a scene if he came home and
found you here.
Jack Willing-I Just left him at the
club; he won't be home very early.
May Kissam-How do you know?
Jack Willing-He was 200 in the
hole when l left--Punch
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-03-19
Nave of Crime

81 have fine idea for a crime play"
Go to it."
There is just one point to con-
sider."
What is that?''
Would have to pay any royalties
to the county if I dramatized the pro-
ceedings of the grand jury?"
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-03-19
Woman's Precious Gift.

The one which she should most zeal
ously guard, is her health, but it is
the one most often neglected, until
some ailment peculiar to her sex has
fastened itself upon her. When so af-
fected such women may rely upon Lydia
E. Pinkham's Vegetable Compound,
remedy that has been wonderfully sue
cessful in restoring health to suffering
women.
IF you have the slightest doubt
that Lydia f. Pinkham's Vegeta-
BILE Compound win help you, write
to Lydia II. Pinkham MedicineCO.
confidential Lynn, Mass, for adj
vice. Your letter will be opened
read and answered by a woman
and held in strict confidence.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-03-19
Miuht Be ARRANGED.

The Luncher-Look here, waiter
I'm very sorry, but I've only just suffi-
cient money with me to pay the bill,
and nothing left for a tip for you.
The Waiter (confdently)-WouId
you mind just lettin' me ave another
look at the bill, sir?-London Sketch.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-03-19
TIE Nose.

DO you believe the nose is an indi
cation of character"
1T certainly is in some cases. The
girl with a turned-up nose is. always
sure that girls who haven't that kind
of noses are snippY."
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-03-19
His Experience.

Shoe CIerk-What size rubbers do
you wear?
Uncle JOSH dunno. 1 guess when
you buy rubbers you have to take your
choice between ones you can hardly
get on at all and ones thatu slip off
as soon as you begin to wear EN-
Puck
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-03-19
Place for EVervthinn-

Where shall I put this copy of
Pilgrims Progress?'" asked a domes-
tic who was assisting her newly mar
ried mistress to arrange a new library.
Why" replied the young house
keeper, "of course that goes with the
books on travel"
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-03-19
Correct DIAGNOSIS.

Doctor-What seems to be your
trouble?
Old Lady-Our neighbors have pur-
chased parlor organ and it is going
night and day so that my nerves are
all to pieces.
Doctor-Ah, I see a little organic
trouble
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-03-19

First Boarder-This is the third
time the actor over there has dipped
up a saucer of cream and strawberries.
Second BOaTdeT-Yes, he is the star
boarder.
First Boarder-Ah! 1 see; the Big
Dipper.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-03-19
A Good Drive.

Did you enjoy your drive in your
new eIectric?"
Very much. I annoyed three traffic
policemen, held up two auto trucks
and kept whole string of gasoline
cars driven by men waiting until said
good-by to. a friend"
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-03-19
LOSING HOPE
WOMAN VERY ILL
Finally Restored To Health
By Lydia E. Pinkhan's
Vegetable Compound.
Bellevue, Ohio. ~ was in terrible
state before I took Lydia E. Pinkham's

V e ge ia bl e Com
pound. Ny ba ok
acheduntil thought
it would break, I had
pains all over me,
nervous feelings and
periodic troubles. I
was very weak and
run down and was
losing hope Of ever
b cling ell an d
strong. After tax
mo vida F pinL-
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-03-19

Record.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-03-19
Ghost of a Smile.

osemary-Have you ever been i'm
pressed by the mystery of Mona Lisa's
smile?
Thornton-No. She looks to me just
like some woman who is doing her
best to laugh at one of her husbands
jokes.-Judge.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-03-19
Faulty Construction,

Bacon-Who is the bowlegged man?
Egbert-Oh, he's one of our self
made men"
We'll, say, itsn't there any law
against faulty construction in your
town."
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-03-19

trouble
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-03-19
Susnicious.

my husband has aroused my sus-
picions."
"How?"
HE hooks up my dress with won
derful skill"
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-03-19
Cooks Occupation.

Mamma-W Where have you been, Lis
beth?
Little Lisbetl-I was in the kitchen
watching cook take the shingles off
fish.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-03-19
Don't Trv,

Isn't there any way of stopping
these cyclones" asked the Eastern
man.
NO" replied the Westerner; the
best way is to go right along with
EN-"
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-03-19
Good Understanding

Mrs. Swoops-Dear, would you OBJ
ject if I wore a slit skirt?
MIR. SwoOps-No. indeed; I'm proud
of EN-.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-03-19
Concrete Floor.

A concrete floor is the best thing
for the miIkhouse This gives a most
solid foundation for the separator and
for such other work as it is necessary
to do.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-03-19

ing, was dizzy
and exhausted at
the least eXer-
ton. Hands and
feet were cold
and he had such
a dragging sensa-
ton across the
loins that it was
difficult to move.
After using 5
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-03-19
Cireumstantial Evidence.

81 thought your daughter received
me rather stifT1y."
"Ah! Then she cid go to that tango
Lesson yesterday. Judge.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-03-19
When Short of Funds

"a man may be good listener and
still not be listener who is good
Quite true. And while you are quib-
bling, permit me to observe that q
man may be ready spender and sill
not be a spender who is ready
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-03-19
Waste of Time.

MY efforts to keep a diary con-
WINGED me of one thing"
What's that?"
That there are mighty few days in
the year on which a man does any
thing really worth recording"
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-03-19
Always Works.

My life is made a burden by bill
collectors"
I've discovered a way of getting
rid Of 'em that never fails"
For heavens sake, put me wise"
''I pay 'em, my boy"
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-03-19
ORA attic pro1reSc

What became of that play you
wrote five years ago?"
THE managers decided it was too
daring to produce"
Send it on again"
q did. They say it's too tame now
Pittsburgh Post.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-03-19
PerFae+Iv A1reAahIa

She Ito rejected suitor)-I'I be a
sister to you, Alphonse.
He (briskly)-AIl right. Come, kiss
your bTother--Judge
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-03-19
About Tins

Church. see Los Angeles now has
six clergymen enrolled as special po-
lice officers.
Gotham suppose they can wake
the fellows who go to sleep on the
benches on Sundays
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-03-19
II Cer+ainiN Is

Patience-Do you ever look back
over the past?
Patrice-Why, that's the only way
one can look at the past.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-03-19
Get More Cows.

Get more cows and enjoy the com
forts of having milk and butter in
abundance for the family table The
skinned milk may be utilized in feed
ing pigs.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-03-19
Theory anf Practice.

'ErOke!
Yes. But l expect very soon to
have. enough to almost get me out of
lebt Im writing a beck on how to
z. eeEl n BUSINESS
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-03-19
Summary Punishnnent

Mr., Dullcop-I see that Huerta has
executed a coup d'etat
Mrs. Dullcop-Did he have the poor
fellow hung or shot?
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-03-19
Aid of Cow TESTING.

Cow testing helps to build up
profitable herd quickly, because heif.
ers can be selected from the best
cows.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-03-19
the Reason.

Lets skip that social function"
''Why 500"
Its a hop"
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-03-19

Putnam Fadeless Dyes color in cold
water. Adv.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-03-19

Dr.. Pierce's Pellets, small, sugar-coated,
easy to take as candy. regulate and invig-
crate stomach, liver and bowels and cure
constipation. ADV.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-03-19

Put out the middleman and put the
profits where they belong-in the
pockets Of the farmer and his wife.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-03-19
Recommending Foes.

Poor COWS and Indifferent dairymen
are the most uncomprom1sing foes OF
the dairy business.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-03-19
RuylnC Tres s.

Always get a written guaranty
with your trees and be sure that the
people behind it are able to make the
guaranty good
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-03-19
A cLERcYMAN's TESTIMONY.

The Rev. Edmund Heslop of Wig
ton, Pa, suffered from Dropsy for
year. His limbs and feet were swol-
len and pulled He had heart futter-
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-03-19

Just a flyer in the stock market has
proved to many man that riches
have wings.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-03-19
When She Smiles,

A woman always has a crouch
When thinking of her letters,
But she is sure to smile the day
The postman brings her letters.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-03-19
Literal

Does your new dress button in the
back?"
No; somebody has to button it"
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-03-19

To live as you go-but save enough
to pay for return ticket
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-03-19

Life would be mighty monotonous if
it were all sunshine.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-03-19
Pedal PeHantrv.

Every girl who rides a bike
On country road or street,
Always has two ends in view;
Those two ends are her feet.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1914-03-19
Its Kind.

1--WE were all in the soup when the
auto turned over"
81 see; in the turtle SOUP"
The Alaska citizen., 1914-11-09
I aris, France, F aces
 Financial Deficit

PARlS-King George was much moved on several occasions during the visit here by the extraordinary enthusiasm fthe Parisian crowds. His emotion on one occasion in pass ing through the Place de la Concorde was very evident. His toast to Paris as a city which his father had loved was an expression which pleased every one.
 The visit appears to have fulfill ed every political expectation. The close understanding between the English and French governments which had never been interrupted since it was arranged in 1904 had become a little vague and misunder- stood by the French public. Doubts had arisen as to whether England was really in earnest in her friend ship for France These doubts have been removed, and the "entente cordiale" seems to be warmer than ever.
The Alaska citizen., 1914-11-09
I FAIRBANKS ID SOUTH AMERICA
 ROAD PLANNED
BUILDING OF THE GREAT RAIL ROAD SYSTEM IS
 SUGGESTED.

The stimulation o1 commerce be- tween North and South America due to the European war has reviy- ed interest ill the project of an all rail route connecting the united States with the countries of the southern hemisphere, says the No- vember Popular Mechanics magazine. When this plan is carried out, as it is almost certain to be some day, ior strategic as we'll as commercial reasons it must be extended to in cIude a railway connection with Alas ka, where the United States gov ernment now has surveying parties
 in the field selecting routes for a railroad system to develop the re- sources of that country.
 Such a railway, reaching continu- ously from the great plateau of Cen tral Alaska to the pampas of South America and beyond, would consti- ute the biggest enterprise of its kind ever undertaken, if it were not that more than half of the line has already been built and is in operation.
 Since the surveys for the Pan American railway were made, there has been steady development in railway building in South America particularly iii Peru, Bolivia, Chile and Argentina, so that much of the work planned at that time has al ready been done.
 That portion of Western Canada lying east of the Coast range, form erly considered a forbidding coun try with an arctic climate, has been invaded by two trunk-line railways, and it's resources are being rapidly developed.
 Half dozen different routes would be available for forming the link route passing down the Pacific coast to Fl Paso. Tex, and thence through Mexico City to Ayutla, the total distance of rail from Fair banks, Alaska, to Buenos Aires, Ar sentina, would be about 12,700 miles. About 1000 miles of this distance is covered by existing railways, leaving about 5000 miles to be built. On the basis of a liberal estimate the entire undertaking could probably be completed for less than 300,000,- 900.
 Every variety of climate, from arc tic to tropical, as we'll as topographi- cal conditions of the most diverse kind, would be encountered in build ing and operating such line.
 Owing to the difficult construc tion and the long gaps to be filled, by far the biggest expenditures will be required in building through Gen. tral America and the northern part of South America. This is the DOT tion of the line surveyed and esti- mated for the Pan-American rail way.
The Alaska citizen., 1914-11-09
TO CARE FOR MISSION.

Mrs. M s. Thompson, who has been serving as a nurse in St Mat thew's hospital, has been assigned to the Episcopal mission at Sal chaket of which she will have charge in the future. Mrs. Thomp- son will leave for her new field of duties tomorrow, and will be ac- companied by Miss Beulah Frederick who will assit Mrs. Thompson dur ing the winter The mission has been closed since Miss Margaret Wightman, who was formerly in charge of it, was taken sick late in the summer
The Alaska citizen., 1914-11-09
GETS NEWS FROM FRANCE

Through his brother in San Fran cisco, Victor Durand has received word from his relatives in France that food prices there are being kept down by the government His brother in San Francisco is a suc- cessful newspaper artist but he has been trying to get a position as war correspondent in Europe. Owing to the inability of the American news papers to send men to the front, his efforts in this way have not met with success Concerning con ditions in the States, MT. Durand's brother says that it is due to the excellent judgment of President Will son that things are not worse than they are as result of the war.