Evening star., 1914-01-25

A NSA looking up gloom
6AlNC<A lily from the pile
NIzZl \ of miscellaneous
1MZkS and half-complet-
"a SIMEjZ d decoration
SSEMEM>C around him. Now.
NSE4& the property man,
@SN~9e as you know. Is
es the fellow who
must see that chairs. tables, fixtures
and all properties are in their proper
places on the stage at the proper time.
The Observer took a seat on the ex-
treme edge of a soap box. which had
been previously covered with unneces-
sary paint by some lavish and mis-
guided person. ..
Are you trying to kid me?" de-
manded the Observer.
This question was fair. There wasn't
an apple within seeing distance of the
property man. In his hand was an old
copy of a newspaper and by his side
were paints To talk about finishing
apples, doing anything to apples,
when one is holding newspapers is
nothing less than raving dementia.
= x
Il amt kiddin you.' replied the prop
erty man, eyeing with jaundiced pessi-
mism the bit of wadded paper he held.
why talk of apples?" asked the OBJ
server why not talk of something
sensible, like elephants with wings or
crocodiles wearing overalls, or some
other pleasant little fgment of fancy:
Why be constrained to apples? Why
Young feller," said the property man
sorrowfuIly. You talk too much. If
you'll close that trap and watch I'll show
you
The Observer humbled. subsidized
It's in the third act continued the
property man. relenting little. She
comes on stage with the apple. Lays it
on table He finds it. Business with
apple. He goes off with it
Well explained the property man.
'.the regular apples gone. Comedian
SHE'D it at the call boy last night and
busted it. Now 1 gotta make another"
But" protested the Observer, you
can't beat nature. Why not go out and
buy few apples? You are no Luther
Burbank You can't make apples out Of
paper"
Son. said the property man. when
: sou get to be property man you gotta
be able to do anything-and do it quick
Why don't I buy apples? First. because
they wouldn't show up as well as mine
will. and. second. because they'd get
sauashed all over everything and the star
would step on one of 'em and probably
get sore and quit the show
The Observer remained silent and the
property man proceeded to work. He
made sort of core of wet paper. nodded
and remolded until it looked like a base
ball on a particularly soggy day. He
squeezed it with the gentle firmness of a
sculptor working in clay. Only the soft
splash, splash of the water which oozet
he MI cd no Nrti
which accompanied the breathless opera
ton.
In the distance a young lady could
be heard, earnestly demanding that
Myrtle return her hairbrush.
The room in which the property man
was working was little larger than the
stateroom on a river, steamer. 1t was
Uttered with odds and ends Of boards.
with Unfinished grandfather's
clock, several papier mache creations
and a framework which could on no.
tice, be converted into anything from
non-practical library to a clothes
horse. AT the moment 1t looked like a
Kansas fence after cyclone had
passed.
The property man, his nolding fin
shed. laid the wad of paper carefully
aside and began cutting queer figures
but of white paper.
Gotta let it dry" said he.
Another moment passed while the
property man and the Observer eyed
the soaked sphere of paper.
What" asked the Observer. finally
would be ..our definition of prop
srty man?'
The goat" replied the property man,
euccinctly.
How so?'
Well said the property man.
you've simply got to think it over and
you'H get 1T. Suppose the missing
papers ain't where they ought to be
In the third act? Suppose the hero
gives an imitation of rat terrier bur-
rowing and doesn't find them in the
hidden partition behind the sliding
panel and has to dive into his own
pocket and pull out his last life insur-
ance receipt and use that? Who gets
:alled down? The property man, no
matter whose fault 1t is! Somebody
may have moved them papers. A scene
shifter may have throwed them papers
away. That's one Of the best things
scene shifters do. Suppose the heroine
leans up again the old oak tree in
front of her fathers home and the
blooming thing comes over and beans
her. Who gets thunder? The property
man! Chances are that the stage car
penter who Ilade the tree did a bum
lob. No matter, pile it on props He
has to stand for it,''
datfes?''
The property man sighed dolefully.
Search me-, said he. Il been irwin
70 find out for twelve years, and I amt
got it yet Mostly he's got to look out
Tor the 'propsss everything, that is. that
amt scenery. He's gotta see that the
paper knives and magazines and money
and revolvers are all in their proper
places. He's gotta have the grass mats
ready for the forest scene, and the pap.er-
nache rocks and the practical telephone
and the running water.
Then they give him odd jobs Some
times he has to make up props for whole
scenes. like in case of stock companies
He's got to be able to paint scenery like
an artist, make furniture like carpenter
arrange things like a bloomin' architect
and watch the exits and entrances like a
government detective trailing customs
swindle."
rs that all?" asked the Observer.
Il knowed one man in props said
the property man, refectively, who used
10 do a singin' turn in the old nlelodrama
7ays when they used to have olios be.
tween the acts. But he got fired"
What was the trouble?"