Hopkinsville Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1889-1918, 1914-03-14
HIS PLAIN ACCOUNT
Story Written on Facts Known
to Writer In General and
Particular.
~ HAYDEN cARRurA.

ioNs Chh you play inc Nlouu
Il dunno" says the other Teller, Il
never tried" Which is the same with
me. Can ! write a story7 | dunno;
never tried. But I'm reasonably
sure can give a plain account OF a
recent happening right here near
our town Of Hawleyburgh. the facts
OF the same being known to me In
general and particular, partly from
being there and partly from setting
In Pickelson's grocery and using
pair Of nat'r1 gifts heaven bestow-
ed on me. refer to my ears.
Well, you see, there is a mighty
likely girl lives near here as could
name-in fact 1t won't do no harm
II | do name her, though her name Is
mighty likely to change-but that's
another story, as a third Teller said.
Her name, then, Is Matilda Chollop
old Squire Chollop's daughter.
Pretty tne figure of a girl. Good
many feliers been sweet on her. Had
my own inclinations that way, Don't
go round talking bout 'em though.
Not a word to say what she thinks
Of me. May know, but shan't tell.
VIII say this, however, that she
thinks less OF a certain Teller named
Hanks than she did
You see this here certain Teller
named Hanks came up here from the
city for his health, he said. He got
some fine outdoor exercise fore he
got through that ought to have give
his state OF health a considerable
hist
You see old man Popdale, who
lives out four or FIVE miles, give a
dance one night last fall to christen
new barn. Fine man, old Popdale
is, and everybody knew they'd have
good time, with two fiddlers and
lowed they'd go, OF course this
here Hanks he had to UP and plan
to go too. Called 1t hop" Tar
nationest fool you ever see, Hanks
was--little slim Teller with red eyes.
Used to 60 round with his head up
like a balky COW, with board over
her face. Course he thought he had
to take somebody to his pesky hop,
and he asked Matilda Chollop. And
| somehow she said .yes--out OF pity
for the Teller. mebby. went out
to old Chollop's myself the next day.
thinking I'd ask her to go with me,
but she said she'd promised Hanks.
Some folks might athought from
her manner that she was sorry that
she'd been so fast, but ! won't say
anything about what l thought. I'm
not saying everything / think. Any
how. I'll say that she wished So fore
she got through.
Well, l went out to Old Popdale's
on the night of the dance, even IL
Matilda had gone and made some
rash promises, and lots of other
folks were there too, all anxious to
start the new barn right and see
that the cider didn't s'pile. And just
as 1t was growing sort Of dark up
drove that there Hanks, who was up
in the country for his health, and
Matilda Chollop, who wished, mebby,
that she'd come with me. Hanks
had borrowed the Wilder Camden
foot's one-hoss phaeton-one Of
these here ve-hick-els which looks
like a big basket and with powerful
big wheels behind and nightly little
wheels in front Biggest wheels
behind and smallest wheels for'ard
you ever seen, that being the way
with phateons in gen'ral and this one
specially particular. Well Hanks
tied his boss under a she'd and him
and Matilda went into the barn with
the others and the two fiddlers
struck up and soon we was all dane
ing right lively-tripping the light
bombastic toe. as Hanks said. 1t
was enough to make you sick to hear
that Teller talk
Well, we kept 1t up livelier and
livelier till along about midnight. the
fiddlers saving away like all get out
and the cider holding out uncommon.
1t being an extra large barrel and
extra full. l reckoned mebby Ma
tilda would have got enough OF
Hanks riding out with him, but she
didn't seem to of, and so she must
keep dancing with him right along.
bout every other time. But didn't
lind any fault-not mite. AS usual
| was a-hearing and a-seeing. but
wasn't saying a word.
1t was just about the darkest night
you ever seen. No moon for six
weeks. and the stars behind 40 miles
of solid cloud. And 1t happened
along about midnight, or some after,
or Whereabouts. that some blamed
rapscallion. or rapscallions. went out
of that barn and into the shed where
the bosses was hitched And this
here teller. or fellers. they walked
around while-prob'b did = and
prob1y they talked some, and they
seem to have entered into an unholy
and lowdown conspiracy to make
trouble for this here Hanks. And
what did these here scalawags do but
auvan than mia aton uhaala ~