davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Washington herald., 1914-04-05

buffers who dasn't shoot tn" neck OF
a decanter behind the bar had kinder
SUSPECTED sunthin' of the sort all along.
but when the truth came out | was so
astonished that I furgot to open the
poker game at the usual hour. Jack
Tom, I'm Stain the facts. amt II
Reckon YOU be. Jcdge." replied Jack
but I'm a bad man fur all that-reai
bad,
And I'm wuss-fur wusS." added Tom.
Il see and I'll now purceed TO dis
tribute iestiCe with an even hand. Con-
stable Haley We will take the guns away
from them buffers and hand EN- over.
How they hcv carried 'cm around so long
and not shot themselves is a wonder to me.
Does either of the terrors wish to hle
an exception to this rulin
Il do" both answered in chorus.
"INrect Consider the exception as
filed. and now the constables will con-
duct ye. one by one. to the door, head
We to the west fur Big Rock Trail, and
give We n fair start with his boot When
the kickin' is over with ye kin consider
that iestIce has been done and that the
law has thrown its purtectin' mantle over
the pair of yc. Thar's jest one more word.
Don't come back here. It's case of
suspended sentence to allow ye to be
booted out of town fur couple Of dubs,
and should We show up agin the case
will be reopened and yen feel the airth
grow hot under yer feet. Does any
lawyer or anybody wish to protest agin-
the iedgement of this court?"
Nobody did. or il they did they didn't
care to say so, and his honor raped on
the table and said:
Then this court is adjOined siny dye.
and anybody in a hurry fur jestice kin
find me at the Red Dog and wilin' to
listen. Even when I've got a hand in a
poker game I'm wilin' to throw up my
keerds that, the law may prevail and
jestice be done in the land"
The Washington herald., 1914-04-05

of two grain sacks. They were filled
with money packages and taken to- the
vehicle and drove Of. No less than ten
different people saw them with the sack.
and saw them drive off. but il was no
ones business to investigate They had
a start Of an hour and a half. and the
only cute thing they did was to make q
half circle around the town and mislead
pursuit for day. All Clews were soon
lost and to this day no arrests have
ever been made.
My uncle had detectives almost by the
,lozen. and tho majority Of them tried
much harder to convict me than to over
haul the robbers. ! was questioned and
cross-questioned until bored to death, and
for a change they would threaten me.
Some thought / had buried the money
somewhere. as il one could go at high
noon and do such a job. and the sleuth
of all slcuths. was sure that | had stood
in with the two men and was to get
my share of the proceeds" After making
this celebrated discovery" he called on
The Washington herald., 1914-04-05

tion was a brief ono. however. II was
the crowd against Bowser, but he was a
fighter. He had ST. in his wallet and not
till the last cent was gone did he aban-
don the struggle When the ballots were
counted up he found he had lost by over
90 votes.
I'm so sorry,'' whispered Mrs. Bow
scr, as she followed him out of the
church.
lie made no reply.
1t was awful that YOU paid out $50
and didn't get the cane after ALL
She heard him ErittinE his teeth. but
he answered never a word.
You are probably the most popular
man in town. but they combined against
you
walked home and entered the house MIR
BOwser turned up the hall gas. hung up
his hat and as Mrs. Bowscr sank down
into chair he lowered over her and
shouted:
Woman. this is the end
'W-what do you mean" she asked.
You worked your little game and got
me downed. and no excuses or CNplana-
tiOns will co.
But what did do
My lawyer will he here at 10 O'Clock
in the morning You can doubtless have
yours meet him at that hour. Ii won't
take long to arrange matters"
But H.
That is ALL Mrs. Bowscr-alI except
the divorce and alImuny. As | have
some papers to prepare for the business
tomorrow will hid you god night
good night"
But can't
Good night. Mrs. Eowser," ne repeat
cd as he bowed and waved his hand and
retired to the lihrary-"good night
The Washington herald., 1914-04-05

The Kincardine Bank was one OF the
oldest and strongest banking institutions
in New England, though situated and
doing business in town of 200 inhabi-
tants 1t made loans to hundreds Of
farmers and il did business with many
shipbuilders and ship owners along the
New England coast. Many and many
time. as assistant cashier, I have seen a
million dollars stacked in our vault, and
have tossed packages of $500 about as
II they had no more value than so much
old paper. l say we did a large business.
but yet our building was a humble one
and our methods as primitive as might be
found in a country store. We had
brick vault with iron doors. but the
LATEST sort of a cracksman would have
dug his way into it in an hour with
crowbar. Outside of the vault was an
fashioned bolt-headed safe, which
locked with a key only. 1t had strong.
massive look, but the lock could have
been picked in a quarter of an hour. and
two ounces OF powder poured into the
keyhole and exploded, would have torn
the door of. 1t will surprise you when
I say that sums Of money as large as
$1,000 were often left in that old safe
over night My uncle-James Gordon
Kincardine-who died a few years ago.
was to blame for our way of doing busi-
ness. He was a set man. He hated in
novations.
/ was twenty-three years old when a
place was given me-. II was not alto
gether because ! was the nephew of my
uncle, though of course that was pull.
I was fairly keen and shrewd for a
young man. and had been with bank
for two years before came to the Kim
cardine. Our cashier was then almost
sixty years old. He had been with the
bank since its organization, and was as
set against new things as was my uncle.
have told you my position was assistant
cashier In a country bank that means
assistant paying and receiving teller, or
at least II did with us. AL money came
in and was paid out at one window. The
bank opened at o'clock in the morning
and closed at p. m. At u O'Clock noon
every soul in the place except me left for
home and dinner, and no one returned
until after l. There wasn't much busi-
ness TO be done at the noon hour, and
generally had the time for reading.
I had been in the bank almost two
years when the rooms overhead were va
Gated and rented to a travelling doctor
for month Tne doctor gave his name
as Jordan and cured by laying on of
hands. he was large, portly man, with
The Washington herald., 1914-04-05

1t OF the time. and nobody knowcd at
what hour of the nigh, these bad. bad
men would break loose and make the
splinters fly. Arizona Jack. do I do ye
an injcsticc by sayin' that yc are a
bad man
I'm bad all through" replied Jack as
he rhankCd his teeth
And how is il with you. Tom
I'm still wuss."'
Then | haven't hurt your feclin -
continued His Honor. When these two
bad men come together thar Orter hev
bin shootin'. LuI no shOOtin' took place
1t was all talk Every time they met
which was about four times day. out
came their guns. each would whoOp n
whoup. and rv, yhOdy would git outer
the way of the aulI"ts. But the bullets
diGnN ny. After braGgin' and BLOWN
and hmstcT:n' iur ten minitS, the bad
men would se"arate and no harm done.
That's the wav things hev hin Goin',
with Sandy BCnd on the ragged edge.
but last night Arizona Jack comes to me
in my private room off the bar of the
Red Dog Saloon and says:
ledge, / wants jeStlCe."
What sort o jestice?"
''Jestice again Kansas Tom. He's
threatenin' OF my life. and I want him
put under bonds to keep the peace"
That's what ne said" explained His
Honor. "and | hadn't skaSsly recovered
consciousness when in comes Kansas
Tom. I thought 1 had neN er seen such
bad lookin' man as he was but he sits
down and nunbiy says:
''Jedge, / wants iestice-"
What sort o Jestice"
'Jestice aSin Arizona Jack. He's bad
from the top Of his head to the sole
of his feet. ahd :. We dOu'J put him under
bonds. hen tall my Efe."
The surprise o: this yere court kin
be imagined" said his honor, as he
looked around the room" The two bad
men-the two Ierrors-was only . pair OF
The Washington herald., 1914-04-05

me one evening and spent two hours in a
vain cndeavor to extract 4 confession. 80
He even Offered mC-aud think my uncle
put him up to tEat-immunity from pun
lShment and cash bonus OF S1O.r0D to
give the whole thing awa> What tho
detective and my uncle thought and said
vas food for the reporters and so | was
raked on all sides
For years and years WAS a suspected
person. and few men dared to own my
friendship Even when men no longer
dared suspect they talked OF me in con-
neCtion with the rohb,rv. and asserted
that ] WAS next door to a fool that |
did not suspect and ChCCkmate it.
have given YOU true and honest ac-
count OF the whole circumstance and no
matter what your version may ne. feel
the better for having written il out. I
contend that my uncle's primitive and
reckless system was al to blame. and in
this know that llI bankers and their
employees will agree with me and absolve
me from all blame.
The Washington herald., 1914-04-05

sort o caucus wild yo'r self an solve dis
question. When yo' hev solved il den
dig in yo'r toes an stick right dar. De
place dat fits yo am de place to hang on
to. We can't all be statesmen, an We
can't all black stoves an whitewash
fences. We has Cot to divide up. If yO'
has bin blackin' an whitewashin' fur de
las twenty vars don't drap yo'r brushes
an start out to be a statesman. Same on
de odder hand. George Washington was
a mighty good gineral. but he'd hev bin
a mighty pore man at whitewashin'
kitchen ceilln'. Samuel Shin. Of dis club.
am famous fur de shine he puts on stove
pipes. but II he should go into poetry his
name would sink into oblivion.
An now. my frens. I dOan' want 10
take up de time of dis meetin'. l think
incite any Of yO' TO higher aims an am
bishuns l shall feel dat hev not spoken
in vain. ! thank yo' fur de deep interest
yO hev shown. an in keerless sort o
way. an widout any ambishun 10 gain on
my part. I will Obsarve dat artsr De
n.eetin' has broken in two yo' will ind
ME at de fOt Of de alley stairs. shall
hev my satchel wild me. an in dat satChel
dar will be rabbits fuis fur sale at
cents apiece. Also a suah cure fur cons
at 10 cents bottle and sum powders
warranted to keep of de nightmare an
make ha'r grow on d" haldeqt "f heads
In closing Brother Gardner SaId 70 the
members Of the club.
My fr'cns. dat was u:i-hr good fdvi"e
YOU got. an befO' brcak.n' dis mvrtin' in
two | want to give y"' leetie mo.
DE trouble isn't altogether wild de hog
He's bought fur a hog. treated like hoE.
and vet the fust time he acts like a hog
some folks can't git over hein' astOnished-
One reason why ! feel ~ mean over
hoss-trade is kaSe we know dat We in
tended to skin DE- other feller clean down
to his heels.
Il have kept a dairy every Y ar fur de
biggest part Of my life. but de only OBJ
jet in 1t was To- prov" TO myself dat
didn't know half 80 much as folks give
me credit fur.
One Of my fust mistakes was in turn
in = 81 colt out to winter on so straw
stack. had s. worth Of straw left in de
spriuG hut was Sl2 out ON de colt.
I've seen pu>son kick back when
kicked nv a mule. but I hev allus OBJ
served dat it was a lOsin bizness. Some
men hev To- try it. though. befO' dey find
out dat dcy can't kick wild both laiSs to
once
Oar am lots of BON idiots in dis KEY
try VINO would pass fur purity good mkn
II dcy had de lockjaw de var around.
It's mighty seldom a man gives himself
away except wild his chin
IF I had my life to live over again
shouldn't expect to do much better dan
have Sort O. seems to me dat man was
nut here to make a fule Of hisself about
once 50 often. anyway"
The Washington herald., 1914-04-05

time she whispered that Molly was in
hiding upstairs, so as not TO be seen
by me. 1 swallowed the last Of the
ole and wrote
Now. Molly Pease,, she thought she loved
windmill man named Fay
He asked her for her hand and heart,
In gallant, knightly way.
I'm rot bloated millionaire
said Mr.. Fay to Molly;
But We can go to the picture shows
And other things 50 Jolly.
Wen take a taxi Once a year,
Wen EuZZls soda water;
Wen take trolley now and then.
As loving couple orter-"
But farmer Pease replied: ''BIsush.
No windmill man shall get her;
And If she wants TO suicide.
Why then, by thunder, let err
Go. thou and take thy vindmiIls bencs!"
Then cried out Molly's mother:
Before I'D let you marry her
I'D sc you theTe-and further"
I'VE must eIopc." said Mr. FAY:
Else surely we'll be parted:
And to our graves both must go.
All dead and brOken-hearted."
And Molly with his vail agreed.
And with a kiss did greet him,
And set the hour when she'd slip out,
And at the schoohouse meet him.
The night was dark-the cats they walled.
And squally were the hreezes
And there mud awaiting her,
Almost up TO her kneeZes.
The rain IT soaked her to the bone
The DARK it did afraid her;
And she did tumble down 50 oft,
A real mud pie il made her.
And when at last she pumped herself
Into a mudhole waiting.
She found her love for Mr.. Fay
MOst suddenly abating.
She wrigred OIt-she ETiggled home;
She cT1ed to he forgiven;
She prumised ne'er to do more
As long as she was liTin'!
The Washington herald., 1914-04-05
HONEST ABE u. S. M.
The Farmers Want Mail and Poetry Combined

At Farmer Dover's his daughter
Molly is usually at the gate when /
come along on my route, but as her
mother was there instead the other
morning l asked IL the girl had fallen
i'll.
Not skassly, Abe-not skassly!" was
the reply, with a laugh.
Hasn't got married within a week."
Not quite"
Isn't out in the meadow picking
strawberries at this season Of the
year?"
Abe. come in and have a piece of
mince pie and a glass OF cider, and
I'll tell you all about it,
While the pie and cider were being
disposed of she related the particu-
lars of the case. and begged me to
make a poem of them. At the same
The Washington herald., 1914-04-05
THE LIME-KILN CLUB
A Breezy Lecture by, Breezy Orator

an bars. but IL yo' want coon meat den
keep arter de coon. Yo' might possibly
git bar by switchin' on, but de chances
am dat yo' will lose both coon an bar
When I sOt out to be an orator | made
up my mind dat muffin shuld turn me
aside. Use been sent to jail. struck by
lightnin'. upset by a cyclone. an almost
hung by a mob, but / nebber let go Of
my grip"
The applause this time put out three
lamps and brought down lot Of plas-
ter. and after the dust had settled the
honorable orator brought forward a new
stock Of gestures and said:
'Fust an fo'most. find out whar yo'
am at. Am yO' sunthin' or nuthin'? Am
yo' man or a mouse? Am yo' a states
man or a dry goods man? Just hold a
The Washington herald., 1914-04-05

I'm either the most popular man in
town or I'm not. and it's a good time to
find out how / stand"
When the voting for the cane began
Mr.. BOwser stood all alone. He saw that
he was out of IL, and Mrs. Bowser made
another effort to get him home. but his
mind was made up to die game. He
bought a hundred OF Bowser tickets at
one swoop and deposited them in the
box. and these put him up far ahead OF
any other candidate. His period Of eXulta-
The Washington herald., 1914-04-05

I've had no less than seven men ask me
IL / would run for mayor next year, and
believe I'll take n nomination"
When the fateful evening finally ar
rived the Bowsers were on hand at an
early hour. Ii didn't take Mr.. Bowser
over ten minutes to discover that things
were not exactly as he had explained.
In the first place, IL was 10 cents a
vote. and in the next he was a stranger
to most OF the church people and none
Of them seemed to have marked him
The Washington herald., 1914-04-05

hint Mr. Bowser drew himself up and
replied:
Il shall get that cane, and don't you
worry about il. 1t looks as IL there might
be a dozen candidates. but I'll smash 'em
to squash as soon as the voting begins.
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1914-04-30

The executive committee Of the Mar.
shall County Fair Association is pre-
pairing to let the contract for huge
swine and sheep pavilion at the fair
grounds. large enough to house 700 or
more animals. 1t ia thought the build
ing can be built for $500 TO $500.
Work is to be begun In short time.
The ground dimensions OF the pavil-
ion are IS by $40 feet. but II is prob
able that the length Of the building will
be extended to 800 feet. The site
chosen is just, east Of the cattle barn.
and near the northeast curve OF the
race track.
The pavilion will consist OF only q
roof. supported by stout columns. 1t
win be without sides. except the Slated
sides Of the pens. The floor space Will
be divided into four rows OF pens by
s feet, with two alleyNays seven feet
wide, extending the full length Of tho
building.
Each pen Is planned to hold an av-
erage of three swine, and II the build
ing Is made 800 feet long II Will fur
nish room for 24O pens and 720 ami
mails. Built that size. the pavilion Will
provide room for probably all the swine
and sheep that will be exhibited. There
was no room for the big building In
the southwest corner of the grounds. so
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1914-04-30
PETERS AUMAES
!. D)NE'S BRAVES
GARY BOY GOES FULL ROUTE IN
sHUT-oUr BATTLE WITH
MUscATINE.
REMNANT AsPIRANTs ARE
HELPLESS IN FIRST GAME
Ansons Play ErrorIsss Ball, and Sam
Foster Bags Game With Wicked
4 Work With the FIaiI--M uskis Fling
ers Fail to Puzzle Richards Rockies
Gold Weather CurtaiIs Attendance.

Special to Times-Republican.
Muscatine, April 3O-F'rank Richards.
erstwhile pilot of the Kewanee Boiler
makers, led his lately-adopted Ansons
from the wilds of Marshalltown against
the .Muskies yesterday afternoon with
the sad result that the locals were
trimmed with supreme eclat, the Of
fetal count being to 0.
the local pennant possibilities, Frank
insisted upon rubbing it in. While
the Muslsies were toying with two
fingers, a gent named Peters walked
right thru the game for the Ansons
and permitted but five blows, while his
mates played errorless ball behind
him. all Of which made lovely after
Moons entertainment for the handful
Of the faithful who braved the threat
ening clouds and witnessed the en-
counter.
The Ansons began their saluting in
the opening stanza, when Hickstein
presented Kleminski with a pass good
for one sack. Foster, encouraged, bast-
ed out a single, and sent Kleminski to
second. A sacrifice blow by Carrigan
helped matters along, and the man
with the funny monicker scored on
Richards fly to center field.
Ginch Game in Fifth.
In the fifth round the visitors put
the contest on the celebrated ice by
edging two men around the circuit.
Mike Andreen and Peters himself were
the lads who circled the sacks on this
occasion. A walk, a single, stolen
base and a neatly placed tWo-faced
drive by Foster, accomplished the dire
results and produced the needful.
But three runs were not enough. In
the sixth and seventh. the bloody in
truders continued to be rude, and
rambled home with another brace OF
votes. Turnout the whole engagement
Peters had Boyle's bunch almost help
less with his wicked slants and things
McNeeley hitting for Barrett. sneaked
around to third in the concluding frame
but two were gone and he peacefully
expired there while Keiser flew out to
Richards. The score:
MARSHALLTOWN.
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1914-04-30
CHINESE PLAY BALL
Students From Chinese University at
Honolulu Rival Americans In Own
Game - Remarkable Team Touring
United States to Play Ansons Sun
day.

One OF the most unique spectacles
in the sporting world Is the appear
ance of Chinese in the game Of base
ball. a few years ago evan the sug-
gestion Of the Chinese participating in
the national pastime would have been
laughed at. Today Chinese students
from the Honolulu University are
touring the United States and meeting
and defeating some of the best teams
in organized baseball. Last year the
Chinese team played scores of games
and lost very few. These games were
principally with league teams and
This season they have returned and
have already met and defeated some
IF the classy minor league teams. At
present they are touring the middle
west and have been secured for a
game with the Ansons on the local
field Sunday, May 8. This game will
be the most unique exhibition of base
bal! ever witnessed in this city. and
a great game is assured owing to the
ability of the Chinese and their great
speed. and the all round form now
shown by the home club.
This will be the only opportunity to
see the Chinese In action in Marshall
town and the game will be worth trav-
cling miles to see. The admission. in:
Guiding amphitheater, Is. % cents. The
game will be called at 3so'ciock sharp
ADVERTISEMENT:
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1914-04-30
1O BUILD LARGE
swine pavilion
SHED 4sx2@o FEET. OR LONGER. 70
be ERECTED ~ FAIR
ASSOCIATION.
WILL GIVE SPACE FOR
MORE THAN 700 SWINE

Contract 10 TO Be Let Soon by the
Executive Committss-Paviiien 70 30
East Of Cattle 6arn-Ground Await
able in Southwest Corner 10 Too
Small.
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1914-04-30
HELPFUL WORDS
From a MarshaIltown Citizsn.
Ao,t, l,vro md nainfu11

Is your back lame and painful?
Does it ache especially after exer-
ton?
Is there a soreness in the kidney
region?
These symptoms suggest weak kid
neys.
II 80 there Is danger In delay.
Weak kidneys get fast weaker.
Give your trouble prompt attention.
Doan's Kidney Pills are for weak
kidneys.
Your neighbors use and recommend
them.
Read this Marshalltown testimony.
T. IS. Thompson. 607 East State ST..
Marshalltown. Iowa, says: About
three years ago took Doan's Kidney
pills. procured from the Mcbride &
will Drug Company. and they relieved
me Of backache and kidney trouble.
This remedy restored my strength and
energy and improved my condition 90
greatly that was able to get my
proper rest, getting up in the morning
able to attend to my work. IshaH al
ways be grateful to Doan's Kidney Pills
for what they did for me"
Price soc, ut all dealers. Don't simply
ask for kidney remedy-get Doan's
kidney Pills-the same that MIR.
Thompson had. Foster Milburn Co.,
Props, Buffalo, N. =. ;. I $50,
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1914-04-30

nounced' today that the opening will
be put over at any rate until Friday
Of next week. Announcement will be
made later OF the date Of opening day.
The links are In very good condition.
and ready for use. though soane i'm
provements are still under way on
tennis courts and the volley-ball court.
Until the formal opening the hack
will meet the park line car Ut 1880 In
the afternoon and return to meet the
$3.50 car returning. The hack will meet
$3.50 car next Sunday morning ana the
I o'clock car in the afternoon.
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1914-04-30
Albion smaI,pox Scar. Over.

The Albion smallpox scare Is now a
thing Of the past, and public meetings
will be continued The churches will
resume their services next Sunday.
The schools have been open this week.
At the Methodist church Friday ev-
ening the brotherhood will hold ITS reg
ular meeting.
Mrs. c. E. Luce wife Of the Method
list pastor. is improving at the Meth
odist hospital Des Moines. where she
passed thru recent surgical opera
ton for blood poisoning.
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1914-04-30
GETTING SEWER OPEN.
Disssrs Roach Sewer in Filled cistsrs
Th;a eorAnoon

Diaasrs Roach Sewer in Filled cistssn
This Forenoon.
Diggers employed to clean out the
old cistern in the intersection OF Main
and First streets that, when filled, re-
suited in the clogging OF a large sani-
tary sewer that ran thru 1t. had dug
down thru the filling and into the
sewer this forenoon. It was expected
that the sewer would be opened by
night unless It was stopped up worse
than it is supposed to be. The city
is preparing to extend up to the sur
face OF the street the manhole that
opened from the sewer into the bottom
of the cistern. The old cistern will
probably then be filled in around the
extension Of the manhole.