St. Johns review. (Saint Johns, Or.) 1904-current, 1914-04-17

prices at H. F. Clark's, the furni
utre man. Adv.
Furniture for Sale Practical
ly new; will be sold at reason
able prices. Call at this office.
All of President Wilson'S mes
sages are so short and easy tC
read that nobody likes to fine
fault with them.
There is nothing startling in
the statement that this country
is not prepared for war. II
never was.
Most talking nuisances are
willing to concede the listener
enough time to express his ap-
proval of what they are saying.
Some men will do almost any,
thing for money. Two Ameri-
cans have become English SUBJ
jects to escape the income tax.
Oh. yes, we know that Huerta
refused to salute the flag and
that war is imminent, but
what was the score to-day.
I'VE know more about women
than our fathers did" says an
English writer. Probably he
has the suffragettes in mind.
When whisky kills man some
old soak will remark, sympa-
thetically: TOO bad, but he
didn't know how to handle il"
Champ Clark is quoted as
saying that "it doesn't take
much sense to be a president. +"
But. of course, he had other rea-
sons for wanting the job.
A few special deals on Column
bia Photographs which you can
not duplicate elsewhere; terms
to suit. at The st. Johns Phar-
macy. adv.
A lot of old topers will be sur
prised TO learn that a Washing
ton man has kept himself alive
for 90 years on only three drinks
of whisky a day.
An Illinois man. 81 years old.
says he has gone to bed every
night of his life at z o'clock. He
hasn't lived so very long. after
all.
Both DIR. Mary Walker and
Uncle Joe Cannon endorse the
tango. II they could be induced
to dance it together the railroads
might be persuaded to give ex-
cursion rates.
An exchange says that after a
woman has talked over the phone
for ten minutes she says goodby.
hangs up the receiver and then
thinks of something she wants
to say.
The once envied boy with the
most warts. the largest stone
bruise and the greatest amount
of freckles is numbered among
the missing in the present per-
iod Of existence.
The Commercial Club dance TO
be given in the rink next Mon
day evening will be a swell
affair. and il is expected the
rink's capacity will be reached
in point of attendance.
The Big Four Comedy Com.
pany promise something out of
the ordinary at the Multnomah
theatre next Monday evening. in
the way of singing. comedy and
dancing.
j. E. Williams was the only
one TO file as a candidate for the
office of Justice of the Peace
for the st. Johns district. and
the probabilities are that he will
be reelected without opposition.
Judge Williams has made a most
capable official, and the office
could not be in better hands.
The Lincoln Republican Club
of Portland will hold meetings
at the city hall. st. Johns. on the
evenings of April 20. "a. q. and
May l, III and l8. at which sew
eral candidates for Governor,
Congress and other important
Offices will speak.
The finance committee of the
Commercial Club appointed for
the purpose of securing funds for
the Annual Sweet Pea Show,
School Garden and Manufacture
ers' exhibits. report meeting
with the most gratifying sue
cess and the committee is fully
assured that sufficient funds will
be raised to meet all require
ments for making the event the
best ever held. The dates have
not been definitely set. but it is
quite probable that July Sd and
4th will be decided upon. More
details will be published next
week.
Mrs. f. A. Rice entertained
most delightfully."- num-
ber of her lady friends .at
her home yesterday afternoon.
The home was beautifully dec
Grated with bridal wreath and
dogwood. Five tables of 300"
were in progress. The first
prize. a handsome piece of Bo-