davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1914-01-21
GAS, DYSPEPSIA
AND INDIGESTION
"Pape's Diapepsin" settles sour,
gassy stomachs in five
minutes-Time It'll

You don't want a slow remedy when
your stomach Is bad--or an uncertain
one-or a harmful one-your stomach
is toe valuable; you mustn't injure it.
Pape's Diapepsin Is noted for it's
speed in giving relief; Its harmless
ness; It's certain unfailing action in
regulating sick, sour, gassy stomachs,
It's millions of cures In indigestion,
dyspepsia, gastritis and other stomach
trouble has made 1t famous the world
over.
Keep. this perfect stomach doctor in
your home-keep it handy-get a largo
ffty-cent case from any dealer and
then If anyone should eat something
which doesn't agree with them; Il
what they eat lays like lead, fernaents
and sours and forms gas; causes head
ache, dizziness and nausea; eructa-
tions of acid and undigested food
remember as soon as Pape's Diapepsin,
comes in contact with the stomach all
such distress vanishes. It's prompt
ness, certainty and ease In overcoming
the worst stomach disorders is q reye-
lation to those who try its-Ady.
The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1914-01-21
GRANDMA USED SAGE TEA
TO DARKEN HER GRAY HAIR
She Made Up a Mixture OF Sage Tea
and Sulphur to Bring Back Color,
Gloss, Thickness.

Almost everyone knows that Sage
Tea and Sulphur, properly compound
ed; brings back the natural color and
lustre to the hair when faded, streaked
or gray; also ends dandruf, Itching
scalp and stops falling haiAe Years
ago the only way to get this mixture
was to make it at home, which 1s
mussy and troublesome. Nowadays,
by asking at any store for "Wyeth's
Sage and Sulphur Hair Remedy" you:
will get a large bottle Of this famous
old recipe for about 30 cents.
Don't stay gray! Try it! No one
can possibly tell that you darkened
your hair, as it does 1t so naturally
and evenly. You dampen a sponge or
soft brush with it and draw this
through your hair, taking one small
strand at a time; by morning the gray
hair disappears, and after another ap-
plication or two, your hair becomes
beautifully dark, thick and glossy. Adv
The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1914-01-21

used to give before they could vote"
"Can you really remember those
days?" asked the determined airigator'
inc. mo; I'm not curious, not a bit
Of it; but-can you really?"
81 can. 1t was in the days Of my
youth that the plate-glass war, as the
struggle in which women won the
right to vote has since became known,
was being fought. I saw those stir
ring days."
Captain Sky clasped her hands and
beamed.
How perfectly thrilling, Captain
MacManus!" she cried.
do tell me about it, please. Oh, to
have been n Of those early heroes!
What q glorious existence was theirs.
Now-now there's nothing left for
women to find fault with; they have
their own way in everything. Such a
monotonous age as we live in. But,
tell me, captain, why did they call 1t
the plate-glass war;"
Captain MacManus glanced mis-.
~chievously out Of the corners Of his
eye at the Western Woman's special
waiting in her clip for the captains
| signal to open the glass matches. AT
the liners windows women might be
seen clamoring to be allowed to land.
| Captain Nellie Sky needed not.
"Well," said MacManus, lit was In
this way: Women we're the most
grasping beings tn you could mag
inc in those days. They had acquired
| all the world but the ballot. They ran
| the whole world. Stores were run
wholly for their trade; plays were
manufactured with the single eye to
pleasing their tastes; books were writ
ten and Illustrated for their enter
tainment; and so on down the whole
list of everything-except the ballot.
| That was mans last stronghold. He
controlled that, and through that kept
himself deceived into believing that
he ran the world. He hung onto it for
dear life; the ballot and his pants
we're the things he would not give up.
! But the women had set their minds
The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1914-01-21
His Turn for the Feather.

Two motorists, having almost ruined.
their tempers- and their dres-inSa,
vain attempt to find a hotel with g
vacant bed, were at last forced TO
make the best Of a small inn.
Even then they had to sharea bed,
which was-and on this the landlord
laid great jstress--a feather bed.
They turned in, and one 0 ftthe pair
was soon fast asleep; the other was
not. He could not manage to dodge
the bumps and heard hour after hour
strike on the church clock until sas
m, when he also struck.
He did this by violently shaking
his snoring friend.
Whats the matterT growled the
other. ut can't be time to get up
YETI"
"No, it isl't," retorted his friend
continuing to shake him, "but It's my
turn to sleep on the feather!"
The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1914-01-21

man; "I was just thinking what a
funny world this persists in being in
spite Of the efforts Of science to the
contrary. You women lever will be
anything but women. Now, look at
me; when anybody says to me, Cap
tain :MacManus, you're old enough to
remember the days Of the suffra'
gettes,' I'm proud to say: Right you
are But when one Of you says the
same to another, there's a battle IN the
tearoom and you have to put some
body under arrest. Now, why Is that,
Captain Nellie; can you tell me?'
Captain Sky shifted.
"Such conversation Is too old fash
toned to resent, Captain MacManus."
she said. But for your benefit I will
explain that the thoroughly modern
woman does not get angry when re-
minded of her age. On the contrary
she considers it a compliment. There
are a few women left, however, who
persist in allowing the old influence
and prejudices of sex influence them.
It happened to be one OF these that
started the trouble aboard the special.
AS for us-the modern women-you're
ridiculous, Captain MacManus."
Then you. admit, Captain Nellie,
that you yourself are old enough to
remember the days Of the suffra-
gettes?" Asked MacManus,
What! Sir, how dare you!" cried
Miss. Sky. I'll have you know, sir,
that /" +
"Ho! Ho! That you are not over
thirty.fve, Ell? know, captain; /
was just trying you out"
you're a. horrid old wretch" said
the indignant oficeress. IT think
you're real mean"
Chose are harsh words, Captain
Nellie" U,- ~
81 want them to be harsh"
"Then you are indignant because ]
insinuated-" a.
mo, I'm not; not a bit Of it."
"Then why did you want your words
to be harsh?"
Captain Sky tossed her head.
Because" she said, That's why
because"
"The same old reason" murmured
old MacManus, "the same reason they
The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1914-01-21
NOT MUCH Of 4 PROBLEM
Observing Boy Had Sure Way OF De,
termlning the Breed OF Chicken
Served for Dinner.

AH l#. LL IL. - -I EAL az r. = - 80
At a recent dinner in a suburban
district, where all the guests were
amateur chicken raisers, after q dis
cussion Of the egg problem the CONVEX
sation turned to the best breed of
hens. After the good points OF Orp-
ingtons, Minorcas, Leghorns and 9th.
ers had all been brought forth the host
said:
well, the ultimate end OF every
chicken Is the pot, and you can't tell
the difference when It Isl on the table.
Let's see how many can tell what
kind Of a hen we have just eaten
ALI agreed It was a very good kind,
but there were many jguesses as TO the
breed. The only child at the table, g
twelye-year-old boy, vas the one who
guessed correctly.
The host beamed on him and said:,
Jimmie, how did you know II Yves 9
Plymouth Rock?"
"Oh, that was easy" he replied
found a feather In the gravy"
The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1914-01-21
THE RULING PASSION STRONG IN
SUFFRAGISM.

Captain MacManus, master airiga-
tor, retired, glanced carelessly at the
universal sun clock and calendar en-
bedded in the glass roof Of the dis
patcher's room Of the &c. C A. Aerial
lines New York float. The instrument
indicated that it was five minutes to
midnight Of August 1, 1862.
Hum" said the captain. thine for
the Western Woman's special to be
signaling for cliproom. What's she
carrying tonight, timothy"
"Wait until you see!" said the dis
patcher. Captain Nellie Sky certain
ly is bringing home the rare passen-
ger list tonight. Ha! There's her ray
working now. What! What's that?
She's using her wireless phone for a
long message. Something wrong, /
guess" :
The dispatcher sprang to the glass
cabinet, where the leaping signal rays
had spelled out the new of the COM
ing of the Western Woman's special,
and thrust his head into the rubber
protected glass receiving hood. Two
minutes later he stepped out and
shook his head.
Those western girls certainly do
cut up when. they come east on a
junket," he said. Rafferty," he said
to an assistant, notify u woman
chief Of police to have two officers
here to meet the Woman's special.
Two passengers T under arrest, and
further disorder threatening" '
Great Scott!" said MacManus.
whats been happening on board the
special?"
ooh, the same old stuff. Always
disorder on these woman junkets. Row
in the tearoom, as usual. Captain
Nellie phones me that she's got two
Of them locked in their cabins and
predicts a row when they land on the
float. Here she comes now"
Out Of the darkness Of midnight a
flood Of light broke upon the float and
turned night into day. Instantly a
clip on the port side opened its great
iron arms, and a second later, out OF
nowhere, the Western Woman's spe-
The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1914-01-21
SIMPLY REASONED 1T OUT
General Manager Could Form Only
One Conclusion From Appearance
of the Applicant

Poor grill" said the general man.
ager, as. the young woman who had
just applied for a position as stenogra.
pher walked out Of his Office.
Whats her troubles" asked the Sec
rotary.
Its too bad that a girl who Is so
pretty-one who might be living in lux
ury-is compelled to get out looking
for work because she refused to listen
to her parents. You heard her say she
was married, didn't you?"
Eyes, but I didn't hear her mention
her parents"
Evidently you have not developed
much ability in the way Of making de-
auctions. Why would a girl with such
eyes, such hair, such a complexion,
such teeth, such a beautiful face and
such a figure as her have to go out
looking for work If she hadn't married
against her parents wishes?"
The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1914-01-21
Salisbury Not a c~ourtier.

The bishop of London on one occa-
sion when he went to buckingham pal
ace told the king that he had passed
Lord Salisbury in an anteroom, but
the latter did not seem to know him.
"Oh," said King Edward, Lord Sails
bury never recognizes anyone" and
going to a bureau he took out a new
portrait of himself and handed it to
the bishop, saying: What do you
think of this??" ga very excellent like
ness, sir" said the bishop. when
showed it to Salisbury said the king,
che looked hard at it and then said:
Poor old Buller! I wonder il he's as
stupid as he looks" t ~
The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1914-01-21
Explorer Not Practical.

Dillon Wallace, who accompanied
Leonard Hubbard on. his foolishly
planned and worse executed trip into
Labrador ten years ago, has now
chiseled an inscription on a rock
where poor Hubbard died. He de-
scribes Hubbard as an intrepid ex-
plorer and practical Christian" a
phrase on which a sermon might be
preached. Intrepid" Hubbard was, but
his reliance upon Deity to make up for
his own bad judgment was pathetic
was, in fact, tragic, and gives to
Wallace's term practical Christian"
a grim if unconscious humor. Virtue,
unhappily, does not take the place Of
venison nor piety Of pemmican, and II
Mr.. Wallace's exceedingly interest
ing record Of the Hubbard rarty's mis-
adventure may be relied upon there
seldom has been more eloquent illus
tration Of the ~sententious old proverb:
"The Lord helps them who help them
selves"
The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1914-01-21
Population of Earth.

The population of the entire earth
is around 1000, O00, OOO-one thousand
six hundred millions. Of this number
Asia has over half, $4,000, 900; Africa,
127, 900, 900; North America, 100000
900; South America, 5000, 900; Aus
tralia, 5,OOO,00 0 Europe, 3SO,0O0,OOO;
polar regions, 100000. There are no
means of estimating the increase Of
the earth's population, owing to the
paucity of statistics and the compare
lively recent date at which any sort
of statistics were possible. But it is
safe to say that from now on, owing
to the spread of science, the human
increase will be greater than ever be-
fore.
The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1914-01-21
The Fur's Purpose,

Miss Elsie De Wolfe, who is re-
garded as the best, dressed woman in
New York, was talking in the smok-
ing room of the Colony club about-the
new winter fashions:
AN evening gown" she said, is
Of the filmiest and most diaphanous
white, with a border Of fur.
This fur border is put on for
beauty-not for the eason that old
Golde's wife gave the other day.
Goodies wife came down to him in
a delicate white decollete gown bor-
dered with sable. Code admired 1t,
but said: =
"I don't quite see what purpose the
fur serves, my dear
"'Oh, don't your cried Mrs. Code.
We'll, it's just to show that I can
afford it," .
The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1914-01-21

on having 1t. First they made apeech
es demanding it. Then they wrote
books demanding 1t. After that there
were parades. No. said the men.
You're not fit to vote Then the win
dow breaking began. why do you do
it?' asked the men. Because says
the women. Because why? said the
men. Just BECAUSE said the WON
en- and heaved some more stones, to
show how fit they were. Then the men
got scared and put the throwers in
Jail. 'Ah!' says the women, we've got
them at last. They can't stand to
have their plate glass fronts smashed
in. Sisters, arm and break some win
dows.' N.
Pretty soon it got so that all the
women were breaking windows. Good
morning. says n to the other, have
you smashed any store fronts? Not
yet says the other. They're all
broken up my way; I'm waiting for
new ones to be put in
mo mans window was safe In those
days. They smashed the glazed door
Of Morgan's private Office. Gentlemen
sitting down for q quiet little game
in their Fifth avenue clubs had a
brick come flying in through their
sacred windows. Nothing was sacred.
The world was threatened with glass;
less windows. It would have meant
tho uynr1lbo anI Tho r,nr1I roca oil
business then, and most business was
done on a front, and you can't have a
front without glass, and there you
are. -.
"'Will you be nice and stop break
ing glass If we let you vote?' says the
men.
"'We'll stop breaking windows said
the women. That's all we'll prom
ise.' =
you're always nice, except for
that said the men, not. being such
fools as the historians Of these days
would make out.
"'Well, if you say so, Of course
says the women and then the men let
them have their votes, and the plate
glass war came to a happy end.
"And afterwards the men found how
they had been double-crossed. Scient-
lists began to investigate why the
women had taken to breaking glass,
instead, of something else. Their dis
coveries showed the sublety Of wom-
ank1nd compared to the simple mind
of man.. The more broken glass there
was the cheaper became those little
hand-mirrors that women can't get
along without eve today, 80 the dear
ladies were really killing two birds
with the same stones"
"Huh!" shifted Captain Nellie. IT
don't believe that at all. Women
never were such slaves to the mirror
as all that"
"No?" said Captain MacManus. "By
the way, Captain Nellie, how did that
dab of machine oil come on your
nose, and what makes your hair hang
down sc funny" 49,
Captain Nellie dashed to a mirror
that hung on the float.
"And by the way, Captain Nellie"
persisted the old man, your passen-
gers have been waiting to disembark
for fifteen minutes"
well, they'll have to wait some
more" muttered Captain Nellie, dab
bling with a powder rag. II simply
look a perfect fright
Copyright, by w. G.. Chanmanl
The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1914-01-21

cial, whose dainty pink hull had trav-
eled from San Francisco to New r
in 40 hours, came 1uttering down with
something bird-like in its movements,
and settled into it's berth with a gentle
exhaust Of ballast-gas that sounded
like a contented, lady-like sigh.
An electrical current blazed slight
ly as it broke out the hermetic seals,
a curved glass door slid open in he
pilot-turret, and out stepped a master
ly woman, whose square jaw and air
of command, without the assistance OF
her ~delicately embroidered pink uni
form, would have suficed to mark
her for the vessels captain.
"Short circuit my signal rays!" she
exploded, saluting her senior, Captain
MacManus. 81 certainly have had a
trip that is almost enough to make a
fellow wish that she was back in the
old days, when she could have stayed
quietly at home and let some man do
this kind Of work. Almost, but not
quite. If there ever was a list Of pas
sengers calculated to make a single
woman want to give up her right to
vote by refusing to work, this is the
one. Why, the tearoom hasn't been
quiet a minute since we left the Mis-
sissippi. It's been an orgy for fair"
"Who are the fair ladies who have
been so-er-so lively?" asked Cap
tain MacManus.
delegates to the Woman's Repub-
lican convention" replied Captain Mel
lie. Everything from ex-governors to
ward workers. 1t was to be expected
that they would be quarreling before
the ship was in the clips. It's that
kind Of a crowd"
And what might the cause OF the
row be-" asked MacManus.
"The most serious thing in the
world" said Miss Sky. "One dele
gate said that another delegate was
old enough to have been one Of the
old-time %suffragettes. Here! What
are you laughing at, Captain Mac
Manus?"
"a was thinking" chuckled the old
The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1914-01-21
Found a Way to IlIumine the Camp

Found a Way to IlIumine the Camp.
Get your tent up" said Heine Gla-
man to his fellow hunters the other
night, according to the Wellington
News, land I'll furnish the light"
When the tent was up he raj his auto
up close, ran a line Of wire into 1t
from the machine and turned the
switch. It made a brilliant light for
the tent and made the ensuing game
of pitch" much more pleasant. The
light would have run for many nights
without recharging the battery, and if
there had been any weakening 1t
would have been necessary to start
up the engine and run for a short
time to recharge it. Something you
didn't know before, isn't it?-Kansas
City Star.
The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1914-01-21
Subway EIocutlon School.

On the New York subway Is a
school car in which all new employees
take lessons in car coupling, door clos
ing and opening, signaling, the opera
ton of motor and brake mechanism,
car lighting and heating and what to
do in emergencies. Among the SUBJ
jects taught is elocution. Each raw
recruit has to learn how to shout
loudly and clearly please watch your
STEP and call out the names OF sta
lions distinctly.
The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1914-01-21
Place for PRAYER,

Probably few youngsters make such
a matter-of.fact business Of prayer as
q certain little Chicago laddie. He was
going to bed one night in an upper
room, which was heated in the old
fashioned way by a stovepipe running
through the floor. A caller sat with
the family in the room below, and this
is what fioated down to the caller. in
the child's clear treble:
"Oh, Billy, come over here by. the
stoyepipe! It's a bully arm place to
pray"
The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1914-01-21
TezkEN 1<e.eA.
Careful.

The case before the court involved
a gang Of thieves, and n Of the &C
cused, a woman, had been found guilty
Of keeping and maintaining a fence"
The penalty was two years in states
prison. AS the Judge finished pro-
nouncing the sentence, the prisoner
called out to her husband, who had
managed to get off by pleading an
alibi and was among the spectators:
Don't forget, Bill, to take the plumes
out of my winter hat and put 'em away
in camphor."-New York Evening
Post
The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1914-01-21
HINTS, HELPS AND GOOD DISHES.

TIN y, = AMI 1OOD DiSf1ES.
When making soups, sauces, cat
sups, or anything that needs strain
ing or putting through a sieve, use the
ordinary -four sitter, or keep one for
that purpose. The use of the crank
will do the work in half the time it
takes to rub food through with a
spoon.
When wash dresses are mussed
without being soiled, or are ever
soiled, rub with a cloth wet In cold
starch until clean, and dampen the
whole with a cloth wet In the starch,
and the dress will press and look
like new.
Cut soft pieces Of flannel the size
Of the child's soles, and with the
white of egg paste them inside and
keep the little people from having
cold feet. A heavy piece Of cloth cut
from mems trousers, the size Of the
rubber sole and pasted inside will be
a wonderful help to keep anybody's
feet warm in cold weather.
To clean furs, take q pan Of bran,
heat 1t hot, and rub and wash the
furs in 1t as if it were water. Then
pound with q stick until all the bran
is out; hang out to air and the furs
will be as sweet and clean as If done
by a professional.
One woman who has excellent palms
and ferns buys cheap coffee and gives
them a drinkaof the brew every week.
A few drops Of olive oil in the bar
by's milk will keep her well without
other medicine. When it Is necessary
to give costor oil, add q few drops Of
the oil Of anise. It makes it taste bet
ter and the oil will not be go apt to
grippe the baby.
When darning a large hole in black
hose, haste. on a piece of black net
ting and darn through 1t, skipping ev-
cry other mesh. The biggest holes
may be easily and neatly filled this
way.
Irish stew.-Grease the bottom Of
a kettle with suet and put in four
pounds Of tender beef. Turn carefully
until brown. Add four sliced carrots,
two onions, six peppers, six potatoes
and a pint of boiling water. Simmer
until the vegetables are cooked, then
remove. Heat a spoonful Of sugar un-
til brown, stir into the gravy, add q
tablespoonful Of Worcestershire sauce,
pepper and salt, and serve with the
vegetables heaped around the meat
When baking sweet potatoes, put a
dish of hot water in the oven near
them. They will not be tough and
dry.
A slice Of ham Drowned and then
simmered in sweet cider is a dell.
cious change from the every day
fried or broiled variety.
The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1914-01-21
Mother

Answers to the question What ID
Mother?" given by supposedly feeble
minded school children Of New York:
She's what you chop wood for.
She's what feeds you.
She's what puts clothes and shoes on
you.
She keeps care Of you.
She's who's good to youb
She's your creator.
She's what's dead on to me.
Best composite portrait Of a mothe
ever painted.-New York American.
The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1914-01-21
Not One Alike.

Our neighbours wife reports this
conversation with the young mar who
comes to take the grocery orders:
"Step in and get warm-you look
half frozen"
Thank you, ma'ana It's queer
weather we're getting"
Eyes, it's sc ~changeabie."
That's the word. ma'am. We don't
get a single day alike, do we?-Cleve-
land Plain Dealer.
The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1914-01-21
Mexican Stamp of Aztec Orioln,

The Mexican stamp bears the coat
of-arms of the country, an eagle on a
cactus, holding a serpent In its talons.
This device is the o%utgrowth Of a
legend that the first Aztec settlers
chose the site Of their city from see
ing an eagle so engaged, and situated
at that spot.
The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1914-01-21
RuB-MY-IlsM

VIII cure your Rheumatism and al
kinds Of aches and pains-Neuraigia.
Cramps, Collie, sprains. Bruises. Cuts.
Old Sores, Burns, etc. Antiseptls
Anodyne. Price 25c.-Ady.