The Idaho Republican. [volume] (Blackfoot, Idaho) 1904-1932, 1914-02-20

hat. (Stalks OUT
Enter T. R. at right. He gazes fix
eddy on Taft.
T. R.-Hello, Bill; how have things
Deen going?
Taft-Fine. l like this job right
down to the ground. It's good job.
T. R. Yes, it was good job.
Taft-Excuse me. l said it IS a
good job.
T. Rand l said it WAS a good
job. I'm glad you've enjoyed it. Four
years of it makes man feel fine as a
fiddle. You'll always look back on
those four years with delight. (Seats
himself on camp CHAIR Long 81
lence. Taft watches T. R. nervously,
and after pause speaks.
Taft-Well If you must be going,
give my regards to all the boys. /
hope you'll have pleasant journey.
T. R.-Oh, I'm not going just yet.
Taft (nervously)-I beg your par
don; thought you were going. You
see, I thought thought
T. r. Cooking around to himself,
aloud)-Fine berth, this sentry job.
I'm glad to get back.
Taft-Must you go?
| T. R. (making evident preparations
to stay)-Oh, no; that's all right.
Taft Err er look here Mr..
Roosevelt, you know I'm going to
take another turn as sentry.
T. RI don't know about that.
Look here, Bill, who gave you this
job, anyway?
Taft (bristling up and assuming a
defiant air)-Never you mind who
gave me the job! I'm here and here
I stay. Get out. Beat it.!
T. R.-The hell | will, you pie
faced simp.
Taft-You great mutt, you!
You've got a nerve coming here and
calling yourself republican. Every
body knows how much of a republi-
can you are.
T. R.-You cheap skate.
| They assail each other with angry
vituperation, shaking their fists, their
voices quivering with rage. The bugle
call is heard.
Enter Corporal.
7. R.-Corporal, fire this pot-bell-
led whale. It's my turn to be sentry
Taft-Corporal, put that brass
lunged buffer under arrest! I'm
sentry here and I'm going to stay.
Corporal-Here comes the adult
ant. He'll have to settle it.
Enter Adjutant. He is fussy, i'm
portant individual; he carries a suit
case labeled National Committee, G.
o. P, U. s. Az in one hand and
school blackboard in the other. All
salute.
Corpural-General, both these men
say it's their turn to be sentry.
Which is right?
Adjutant-It all a question of fig
ures. (He sets up the blackboard
and writes on it rapidly, covering one
side with figures, adding subtracting,
multiplying and dividing He turns
to the others and announces, speaking
rapidly 632 multiplied by gives
1854. Take out Y and we have
1892. Add 536 and it gives 1926;
extract the cube root and it makes
70; multiply. by 16 and you get 1872;
take away the number you first
thought of, multiply by 6, take the
greatest common divisor and reduce
the equation to its lowest terms, take
away in California and q in Indi-
ana divide by and add and you
get Taft.
T. r. (seizing the blackboard and
kicking his foot through TITO hell
with such figuring. looking bitter
ly at the adjutant.) And to think
that I'm the man that taught that
guy arithmetic!
T. r. rushes at Taft with the black
board and brings it down on his head.
Taft squares off and strikes T. r.
T. r. shouting at Taft -You're
an migrate.
Taft-You're liar. You said you
only wanted one cup of coffee.
T. RI meant at that time. I'm
ashamed of you. Get the hell out.
T. R. and Taft take off their coats
and begin to fight. They fight furi-
ously and finally knock each other
out. Both lie like corpses. Their
PROSTATE forms are extended on OPP
posite sides of the stage.
Bryan and Wilson enter cautiously,
peering about. They size up the sit
nation, and after a WHISPERED confer