Clinch Valley news. [volume] (Jeffersonville, Va.) 18??-2019, 1914-11-13
SORGHUM NOW HAS
A CLOSE SECOND
Mountain Hermit Lime Burner
Finds Substitute for sweeten-
ing Buckwheat Cakes.

=
Bro. Campbell, the Mountain Her.
init of the White Lime Works, North
razewell, is u thoughtful. generous
hearted man. This week, one day, he
sent the editor of this paper can
1-2 pounds, about quart, we should
say, OF molasses. So soon as oui
Duekwheat flour reaches him he viii
give said molasses II Try out, and re
port further. Should the promised
Duckwheat be delayed in traiismiss,on
| he VIII substitute cakes OF some othel
variety. The molasses lisp ut ur
| Tor should we say ARE" put
up), in u nice, tin can. with
II red, white and blue label, and is
branded, MARY Jane" and manufac.
tured in New YORK, u. S. A. and
guaranteed under the pure food and
drug acts. Mary James picture is on
the label. We like the looks of the
package from the outside, "The Inside
of The Cup" as it were, can only be
guessed at, taken on faith as "the sub
stance of things hoped for, the evi
dence OF things unseen" The adver-
tisement on the label states, that
Mary Jane is prepared from corn
syrup, molases and sorghum. We
are left in doubt and in the dark as
to what kind of "molasses" is used
in this mixture, unless there is an ex.
planation in the further statement on
the label, that "molasses in this mix.
ture contain sulphur dioXide." Now
we are Il little rusty on our chemis-
try. We know what sulphur is. We
learned during the war, when mother
used to mix 1T with lard and rub il
on our youthful and itching anatomy
Tor certain cutaneous eruption, said
to have been spread abroad and dis
seminnted through the community by
struggling soldiers from the army.
sulphur was familiariy known in our
| community as birthstone, and was con-
sidered II deadly foe and sworn enc
my of the aforesaid cutaneous crup-
tion, and, our old minister used TO
say, was used, or would be used, in
combination with fire, by certain
well known entcrprising individual,
upon obstreperous clrizens who
drunk egnogg ut Christmas. cused,
and did other ugly things, and upon
all boys who went fishing and played
marbles on Sunday and robbed birds
~ WIN DG oDoCiN NCu liluI we
use the words, "cutaneous eruption"
This is as near as the rules and Gus
toms of polite society will allow us to
say what we have in mind. However,
for the benefit of our readers who NAV
not be well verscd in physiological or
medical learning, we will say that
"cutaneous" has reference TO the Gu
ticle, which is the extraneous cover
ing of the epidermis, as it were, and
that eruption is II Latin word, or some
other foreign hybrid, composed of two
words "E," which means "out," and
"rupto" to rub, or by liberal trans
lation and poetic license, to scratch,
or words to that effect. But we di-
gress. To return, for in this learned
dissertion we desire to come right
up to the stratch. Sulphur, or more
familiarly speaking, birthstone, was as
we have said somewhere in this class.
ical eruption, being II deadly foe to
said cutaneous effection of the cpl
dermis, was mixed with lard, heated
slightly until it began to give off IL
delightful aromatic fragrance which
rose like inscents and filled all the
room wherein the concoction was be-
ing concocted, and had driven every
body out of the house except mother
and me. 1t was then applied to my
tender and itching anatomy with
stiff brush, until all that was lacking
to make me an inhabitant of that
place our old minister told us about,
was the application of chunk OF
fire. Yes, we are familiar with the
word sulphur, that is, birthstone. It's
an old acquaintance. GLOW dear to
our heart are the scents of our child.
hood" The perfuming and odorifer-
| Gus power of birthstone can, only be
appreciated in school room where
the majority of the pupils had been
plastered over with sulphur and lard
the night before, and began to "warm
up" before hot fire. One bad boy
remarked that evidently Sherman and
some of his companions had been
treated when he said war was what
it was. But to conclude: Our exten-
sive stock of information on the sub e.
ject Of sulphur, corn syrup and sorg-
hum would seem to argue familiarity
also with what is called "dioxide."
Not so, kind, charitable and indulgent
reader. We regret that Mary Jane
should be mixed up with this mystic
rious dioxide. All her other ingred-
tents are entirely familiar faces, and
their habits are well known. But this
dioxide business, mixed with my old
friend sulphur, and calling itself mo-
lasses, has put one over on us. If
we did not know Bro. Campbell so
well we might be just little sus-
picious of this sulphur -dioxide mo-
lasses, but we will wallop Mary Jane
| olI ho Eno nd hf.L