davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The evening world. [volume] (New York, N.Y.) 1887-1931, 1914-04-15
Queer Epitaphs.

A prose epitaph In a Massac husetts
graveyard Is scarcely less interesting
In Its own way. Here 1t Is:
I'm memory OF Mrs. Lydia Bur
nett who was first Consort Of Mr..
Noah Ripley by whom she had &
sons and IL daughters, II Of
whom lived to have families. Her
descendants at her death were 81
grandchildren and LOG great
grandchildren. She died June 18th
1916, aged 81 years.
Many daughters have done yirtu-
ously but thou excellest.'
In plymouth. England. 10 \ mortu-
airy stone erected to the memory of a
denizen OF that town who persisted IN
America. II reads:
Here lieth the remains of
Thomas Nicols. who died In Phil
ada!phia. March. 1853. Had he
lived he would have been buried
here"
Before the days OF the slang phrase
Douglas Jerrold coined the followint
two word epitaph for the grave or MI
friend Charles Knight:
''0eod N40htl"
The evening world. [volume] (New York, N.Y.) 1887-1931, 1914-04-15
Hits From Sharp Wits.

The fellow with nothing but hob
by can't expect to capture any prizes
at a horse show.--Toledo Blade.
'There In only one thing that will
beat "A mushroom growing" remarked
the Man on the Car. and that IL "A
grievance, ''--'Tolsdo Blade.
1t In not the high cost OF the things
We don't need that We growl about.
Milwaukee Sentinel.
Nobody now blames tho Mexican
Jumping bean for Jumping Chicago
News,
A man who suffers from cold feet Ia
often hot-headed,
Some people are unwise enough Il
admit that they are wise, Macor
Telegraph.
A man in a Massac husetts hospita
has been found with IA heart In tn,
wrong place. He II not the only one
The hearts of some are located II
their pocketbooks. &C. knoxville Fri
hume.
True greatness II never consciou
OF itself.-Albaay journal
The evening world. [volume] (New York, N.Y.) 1887-1931, 1914-04-15
ROAD GRAFT.

0VAXPAYES will follow with trial OF the
and State engineers charged with defraudng the
: in building the CoramPachogue highway Long Island
Witnesses will be called prove that officials Of contracting
company contracted for fifty per cubic loan
which they well could be put for less than $780,
which conveniently omitted by later supplementary
The Attorney also charges that although the contract called
for oadbed sixteen feet wide and inches Deep the
average width of fifteen
depth only inches 900 cubic yards
waited actually claimed only 100000 cubic yards
Costly roads discovered upon examination have
bn Of brush and rocks enered with longer
Workers. The evidence familiar widespread
Let investigation onu with results Fix responsibility
punishment The faster this done roat
building in this State rise above the scandal degradation
it, past
From the only weather that
weather.
The evening world. [volume] (New York, N.Y.) 1887-1931, 1914-04-15
A. 20 Punlsh n eat.

~ IN Editor Of Iie Evening World:
In answer to q mothers letter In
which she says that she spanks her
sixteen. year-oid unruly daughter and
asks whether this procedure u
right one to adopt toward q GIRL of
that age. in my opinion II girl of
sixteen In so unruly that her mother
Ands II absolutely necessary to spank
her. having first tried gentler methods.
the mother In doing her duty and
should continue to do so until her
daughters actions have changed Tor
the better. (MISS) p. b.
4 "DaDe Druaoona" Grievance.
! n tls Editor u To pven,ns World
think II too bad that you feel
Obliged ~ publish such serial as
4 ''ChApters from Woman's Life" by
Dale Drummond. Men are mean and
stia9y enough without having such
things TO read. Ny husband brings
home your paper and insists on read :
Ing the Chapters" TO me. and then
!. sessds hAA an hour lecturing mo on
bND-ageraNnSanaA AR& @.
The evening world. [volume] (New York, N.Y.) 1887-1931, 1914-04-15

agony OF countenance Hus-
band shows concern. SCREEN:
What's the matter. darling?" Lady
indicates upper molar. Puts napkin
around coffee percolator. Applies
heated linen to face. Husband ad-
vises. SCREEN: You'd better 60 To
tho dentists" Wife registers meek
acquiescence. Cut to:
Scene (Kitchen) ENTER lady,
looking dolefui and depressed. Cook
giances up. BUSHES forward. ques-
! tioning. Lady tells her terrible
troubles over again. Della meditates.
SCREEN: well, yer bettor have 1t
pulled. There amt nothin' like pull
lin EN-" Lady shudders. Moves
head In rotary motion. suggesting
utter desolation. Exits. Cut to:
Scene tBedroom)-Lady dressing
Stops every Ave seconds to pity self.
Nevertheless makes herself attrac-
tive as possible, not forgetting beauty
spot. eyebrow pencil. &c. Exits
Cut to:
Scene 4 Subway Train)--Entrance
Of lady causes stir. Men look over
tops Of papers. Women knock her
hat. Various admiring glances oblit-
crate lady's pain. Express station
sudden exodus. People left in oar
one blind man. one washerwomar
and our heroine. Lady suddenly
feels pain redouble in violence
never get there" Cut to:
Scene s (Street in Front Of Once
Building)-Lady approaches. Walks
past once. Walks past twice. Pro
tends to remember important errand
Hurries away Finally, with grea
show OF will power returns and en-
ters building. Cut to:
Scene q (Anteroom of Dentists OF
hce)-Lady received by attendant
Attendant courteous and smiling
Lady wonders how she can smile
Attendant offers magazine. Lad!
scorns magazine. Chances towar'
closed door. (Cut in vision nlm)
, "Old time torture chamber has moth
ing on what's behind closed door,
thinks lady. Cut TO:
Scene 7 dentists Ofiice)-Dentis
smiles. Lady feels she'll never smil
again. Lady sits in chair. DENTS
tits chair back. Lady grabs at hi
arm wildly. SCREEN: Il have I,
madam. to get a proper purchase.
Picks up tiny mirror and instrument
| Lazy DeScttnts' DelliSL ieaSSht'
Lady beseeches some more. DENTS
ditto. Lady jumps seven feet NOR
or less. Dentist registers regre
A SCREEN: "Oh, did touch tn
n nerve?" Lady looks things. DENTS
continues to investigate. Lady be
comes pathetic. thinking i'm help.
doesn't SCREEN. We'll, III jus
put q little treatment In that to-da!
We can't do anything to 1t for sew
eral days" Lady regains equilibrium
q also coQuettishness. Bids him linG
z ering adieu. Cut to:
3 Scene S (pay station phone booth
Lady calls up husband. Tells {
vislt to dentist. SCREEN; oh
The evening world. [volume] (New York, N.Y.) 1887-1931, 1914-04-15
Straight From
The Shoulder
Success Talks 10 Young Men.
Sopynsati 1914. By Th rreAs rubllshins %
THE New fork L'enin. Wordj
BE BriPf.'

49,,
u IL 'he So"i VI more INA"
ID wit. III IL the soul on success.
IL IN conscrNer OF Time IL ~
conserVer oi energy IL IL con-
server OF concentration
" Is more thah All th's' IL IL an
indication mat young man prain
strikes To the cruN OF arSum"nt anu
reasoning swiftly ana surely u ~
positive assurance mat ne ~ captpie
OF condensed thought ~ IL 'tidcnce
that ms Idea crop ~ heing raised ny
IN. methods OF intensive FARMING.
IN giving instructions ou''lhihs
The evening world. [volume] (New York, N.Y.) 1887-1931, 1914-04-15
Letters from the People
The Cost.

the Cost.
To Tho Eiilor ID lae henirx wosh
Answering the problem by "A. r."
namely: sold property FOR a certain
sum and lost Is per cent. II the cost
to me had been 5000 less. the price Il
brought me would have shown a gain
OF II per cent" My answer Is the cost
Of the property was $4,000. Losing
thereby l6 per cent. II brought 1885.
II the cost to mo had been only 81 100
instead Of ~, 800. tho price ! got for It
0l.956 would have shown "a net gain
OF ID per cent. The method by which
l arrived at this solution In as fol-
lows: Let X equal the cost price In
dollars: then $500 =. tx - 600) 1lb-
100. which solves into X $500, the
cost price In tho first case.
JOSEPH HIRSCH.
Dr.. JOwett's Church.
To DE Editor q ne ISsning World
Where In DIR. Jowett's church,
refer to tho DR., Jowett who came 10
this city from England. ID. NIL.
tDr. Jowett 10 pastor of the Fifth
Avenue Presbyterian Church, at No
100 Fifth aysnuel
The evening world. [volume] (New York, N.Y.) 1887-1931, 1914-04-15

: Go. The New York Evening World.
would be hard work getting 10
again"
You are very lazy" said Mrs. Ant
Don't you talk to me like that"
answered Mister Elephant.
What are you 30 excited about p
asked Mrs. Ant.
Il am NOT excited. hut you are %
small l can't get at YOU" replied Mis-
ter Elephant
Why don't you blow me awayr'
asked Mrs. Ant.
IN do IL" exclaimed Master Flo
plant as he filled his huge lungs ana
began to blow.
Mrs. Ant by this time was behind
the big fellows leg and she said to
him. when he had finished:
Thank you for blowing away that
pile OF dirt. 1t has been In my way
] a long time"
The evening world. [volume] (New York, N.Y.) 1887-1931, 1914-04-15

3. ANT was going
nome one day
when she saw
Mister Elephant
shifting from one
foot TO the other.
"whyrion't you
lie DOWN." asked
Mrs. Ant.
The evening world. [volume] (New York, N.Y.) 1887-1931, 1914-04-15

~ am surprised at you,' said
Mister Elephant, trying very hard
to squirt down and see Mrs. Ant.
elephants very seldom lie down"
DO you stand up when you go to
sleep?" asked Mrs. Ant.
Almost always" replied Mister
Ele phant. s"if / should lie down. II
The evening world. [volume] (New York, N.Y.) 1887-1931, 1914-04-15

was awful. What I suffered" Lady
listens. Registers ID light. GU 20:
Scene 8 "a RestauranD-D Discovered,
lady looking over menu. Enter hus-
band. Shows sympathy: SCREEN:
Now, what are you going to eat,
dear? You must order o bang-up
lunch 70 make up for the horrible
The evening world. [volume] (New York, N.Y.) 1887-1931, 1914-04-15
NOT WAR.

~ HE sennR Of fleet Mexico marks serious but not ncon
ssent in the policy Of thin country The excinble
will do well remember that Intervention still many steps
removed.
Hueras type ncnes to experiment how far he can
carry defiance and nsolence with IMMUNITY His refusal comply
with President Wilson's demand that he order salute the Amer
flag satisfaction for insult offered this country the
Of the the Dolphin piece Of bavado hof sly hall
pig headed-n keeping with the character Of the
Nobody will M surprised the prompt and inevitable act Of tho
President ordering display Of force bettng the dignity Of the
United States quick change in Federal
wise forearance forever dispense with such par
chow strength and determination be needed to penetrate
The blunted perceptions Of Huerta.
The evening world. [volume] (New York, N.Y.) 1887-1931, 1914-04-15
J. the making OF inc0ngruous
epitaphs there IL no end. Not

~ the making or tncOngruous
~ epitaphs there Is no end. Not
only the epitaphs you find In
joke books but those that are actually
craven on tombstones. One OF tho
most famous Of these genuine cpl
taphs is to be found in an Edinburgh
cemetery, and bears an eighteenth
century date:
"Hcre lie I. Martin Eid.eLrOd.
Hdrc mrrcD on my SOIL Lord GOd!
rs I ToUid do. II rSrc Go1
And Thu trert Martin Tidin brOd."
Near Salisbury Plain. in England. is
the grave OF one William Button. His
epltaph runs;
"Oh, sun, moon. stars and We celestial
pOies'
Are 0Eorcs. then. d,rindicd into But
tOnhoies"
Which IN not az clever az this cpl =
taph which a famous New York dem
tist composed for himself:
stranger. approach this Orare ,oifh
hitting 0rdrity;
Here lies denttst --hlNHo his last
eaaxtN"
The evening world. [volume] (New York, N.Y.) 1887-1931, 1914-04-15

time you've had" Lady orders.
Win" cooler accompaniment. Hus-
band pays check without murmur.
Hands out greenbacks. SCREEN:
Now, 20 to some matinee, dear, -
take your mind of things" Leaves.
IN. d. And yet women want their
"gightslJ
The evening world. [volume] (New York, N.Y.) 1887-1931, 1914-04-15
The Nay Manton Fashions

TINE blouse with
Normandy col
lar IL a very
new one. very smart
ind very attractive.
; This one 10 made
from organdle, which
IN the latest cry and
which makes the
daintiest possible
blouses. The model
can be used. how
ever. for any sea.
sonable material, the
crepe de chine that
will be worn all
summer quite a.
well a. the cotton
and linen ones. Cot.
ton crepe makes I'D
m ost attractively
and In extremely
smart, and the voilea
OF the season are
unusually attractive,
for there are q great
many shown in en-
brOidered figures az
well as the plain
material. The COM
bination Of the rag.
Ian sleeve at the
front and the XII
mono at the back 10
especially SIN art.
This blouse 10 al
white. but touches Of
color are fashion
able. and white wolfe
or cotton crepe for
the blouse, With thu
collar and cuffs Of
yellow or Oor10e,
would be charming,
or the blouse could
be made Of color
with trimming Of
white.
For the 1e.yaar
size the blouse VIM
require ~ yds. u
material p. l7s yA.
The evening world. [volume] (New York, N.Y.) 1887-1931, 1914-04-15

travel the Titanic dsaster-News item
after years don't hear complaints
luxurious speedovers that they landed late
for dinner"
The evening world. [volume] (New York, N.Y.) 1887-1931, 1914-04-15

at MANTON
Building
80, $Wamps pattern ordered
PsH~A {U wanted Add two for letter posase In
The evening world. [volume] (New York, N.Y.) 1887-1931, 1914-04-15

The Thaw case II now on way United States SUI
preme Court A long for q murderers money.
The evening world. [volume] (New York, N.Y.) 1887-1931, 1914-04-15
Little Causes
of Bis w ars
By Albert Payson TeIhune
T er h U n e

Copyright by wtd.
No. ia Betrayed Confidence That Led to Indian WSr
YOUNG United States Army ocer-Tom Custer brother Of O.
taken by scout in 1874 20 ~
strange Sioux the Of granting r
k&4@ honors Indian
The later declared
solemn tell what hS
might The youthful Indian undergo odss
receive RanintheFace
fellow
of detail being him from the
through the muscles his shoulders called
tell special deed
in this
He said they had dgarded his
followed
killed and scaped them while they asleep.
nearest fort ae his alleged promise pa tss ts9,
cavalry
once sent capture Rain s indian was seized dragged tn. fort and
Tho Fl, III s :" Ss ~ : :
G @ he D" ray the tort r WAS 1sv e.
for v % and S.S
C" ,hie,"s and other outlaws whose medicine
Al a in horde. He
WI" a hn ss s S
helped weld together cuthroa
making RT 'ns ssa S', u s " s.
sss%% as e0"'r' the band
climax came an
n' @ By Ham " and s,a fTss rode
amd u s The soldiers:
the forefront ron. the fight d.
. sS he casas
Kann hs:Fas on hi.
o..h "fS s" sse Face on NJ.
fu.m.n s'S Witch %ss'e Cent eu , ~::
Tho Custer battle n% " rossa fs s n1a eH c'h %
rs G ,n GeN Miles axana
in comfort unit. safe states
The evening world. [volume] (New York, N.Y.) 1887-1931, 1914-04-15

~aat
The evening world. [volume] (New York, N.Y.) 1887-1931, 1914-04-15
Movies q Ia Mode
The Lady and the Dentist.
Bu Alma WOODWARD
Copyright 1914. by The PrG~s Publishing 20.
The New YORK Evening World.

,ENE Dining Room)--I.ady
and Spouse at breakfast.
Lady bites on biscuit. Sud
den rise from chair registers
Durant weekly news. (Durant, Choctaw Nation, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 190?-1944, 1914-12-04
First white slave Conviction


A Bryan County Jury Tuesday ~
sessed for the first time in the his
torS7of the county. a penalty for
white Slavery In fact. this is The
first case ever tried In this county.
The Bryan county jurymen did OF
believe in temporizIng with light
verdict but assessed penalty Of fi1s
years in the penitentiary and line
Of $500.
II was the case Of ]. o. Bell charg-
ed with attempting to carry off a
young girl to another state for i'm
ney made the charge stick to an ex-
treme degree. The wife Of Bell who
moral purposes and the county attor
ney made the case stick in an ex-
treme degree. The wife OF Bell,
who was charged Jointly with the do
fendant ha dher case dismissed by
the state.
According TO tlal testimony Boil
Engaged young eirl by the name Of
'Tennyson, sixteen years Of age. 10
work at his home and take care of
his wife, and that after the girl had
been at his home about week he
and his wife started with her to Kan
sas City or to some other point. They
were apprehended at caddo and were
brought back to Durant. Bell had
table, intending to drive to cau4
and take the train at that place for
Kansas City or some other point The
mother Of the girl became suspicious
that all was not well, aud notified
the officers with the result that The
arrest followed
Bell was acquitted of the charge
OF rape upon the person Of the young
girl.
Durant weekly news. (Durant, Choctaw Nation, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 190?-1944, 1914-12-04
.-AnVET3TTsENIENT
RUPTURE
Results Not Influenced by Age OF
Time Standing Reports Expert.


An assistant of F. II. Seely, OF
Chicago and Philadelphia. the noted
truss expert. will be at the Atwood
Hotel and viii remain in Durant
Wednesday and Thursday, Decenl-
ber and 10. Mr.. seeley says:
THE spermatic shield as furnished
to the United States Government will
not only retain any case of rupture
affording immediate and complete
relief, but close the opening in ten
days on the average case. This in
strument received the only award in
England and in Spain. producing re-
suits without surgery. harmful in
iections, medical treatment or pre-
scriptions. Don't wear truss
where the lump is but place It where
the opening is-it's different cali
and be shown, If any interested call
and he will be glad to show same
without charge or fit them II desired.
Anyone ruptured should remember
the date and take advantage Of this
opportunity. WI
Durant weekly news. (Durant, Choctaw Nation, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 190?-1944, 1914-12-04
County offices to Move.

1t is now only shotr time until
the law combining the county Off
ces goes into effect and when the
county officers here will have a gen
eral moving day. The office OF the
County Court Clerk and Clerk of the
district court is consolidated into
the. office Of Court Clerk. Judge
Rappolee will then move his court
room into the offices now occupied
by County Clerk McCreary. SO that
the office will be adjoining that o.
the present District Clerk. The Of
flee OF the Register of Deeds and the
County Clerk are being consolidated
Henry Mccreary will move his Of
flee into the rooms to be vacated by
the county court so that the offices
VIII adjoin that of the present Reg.
lister of Deeds whose duties he win
assume.
Durant weekly news. (Durant, Choctaw Nation, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 190?-1944, 1914-12-04
initiated Measures are killed

Unofficial totals which have been
compiled from the returns in the Of
flee of the State Election Board show
that all of the initiated measures
that were proposed by Attorney Gen
eral Charles West failed to carry be-
cause of the handicap OF the silent
vote.
While Secretary Morris of the Ell
ection Board is giving out no final
figures because he has turned the
matter of canvassing the election ov-
er to the legislature. number of
compilations have been made from
the returns which are reliable. These
show that the proposed constitutlon-
al amendment to reduce the maxi
mum levy of state taxes from 3 Y TO
az miits received the greater num-
Der of affirmative votes of any of
the initiated questions. The total
vote on this proposition was 1875
for and 81 ,120 against with Harper
county out. A total affirmative vote
OF about 124 thousand would have
been necessary to carry the PROPOSE
tion under the constitution. Tho
proposed reductio nof the size OF The
legislature only received 94.6S6 az
firmative votes.
Durant weekly news. (Durant, Choctaw Nation, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 190?-1944, 1914-12-04
War Tax Effective.

The EMERGENCY war tax bill 10
raise 100 million dollars in revenue
went into full effect Tuesday. The
provisions of the measure levying a
tax on beer. wine. ETC.. went into ef-
feet on November /, and included a
tax on bankers, pawnbrokers. pro-
prietors of theaters. including motion
picture houses, officers of circuses or
other shows, perfumes, cosmetics,
chewing gum and similar articles.
commercial papers Of all descriptions,
steamship tickets. parIor car seats.
sleeping car berths, and telephone
and telegraph messages where the
charge exceeds fifteen cnts Stamps
in denominations Of from SIS to one
cent are to be affixed to these arti-
cles.
Durant weekly news. (Durant, Choctaw Nation, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 190?-1944, 1914-12-04


Staff correspondent
London England am able to
give you the following as the views
Of Minister Of War Millerand Of lie
French Cabinet on the duration of
the present war:
His estimates are based on tie be-
lief that the Germans will commit
no great tactical error.
He divides the war into six per-
iods-two past, one present. aud
three to come.
The first period was the advance
through Belgium into France.
The second period was the bat
tie of the Marne and the retreat Of
the Germans to the Aisne.
The third period is that OF the
righting on the Aisne, continuing
and developing into the battle for
Calais.
The fourth period will be the Ger
man retreat and the battle on tie
Meuse.
The fifth period will be the fur
tber retreat and the battle IN the
Rhine.
The sixth period viii be the march
to Berlin.
He estimates that the battle OF Ca
lais win end about the beginning OF
December
He assigns period Of five months
to the battle Of the Meuse-the end
Of April or the beginning OF sIey
1915.
The campaign on the Rhine should
last nearly twice as long-that Is to
say. until February 1915.
The final march to Berlin and the
negotiations for peace should bring
the war to an end with the final with
drawaI OF the allied armies Of occu-
patton in 1917.
This estimate gives a total per-
iod of rather less that three years
to the war. 1t is presumed by Mr.
Millerand that the Russian advance
win occupy a similar period, and
that only. the steady combined pres
sure Of the allies can bring the mat
ters to a conclusion within the time
suggester. He assumes that the ser
man forces viii withdraw steadily
and there will be no Sudden colla1se
Of either front.
Durant weekly news. (Durant, Choctaw Nation, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 190?-1944, 1914-12-04
oIlahoma CITY Market


Oklahoma City. Dec. 3.--With q
liberal run OF butcher cattle and
stockers on sale SO far this week
our market on the kind OF stocker.
is fully quarter low. while the
medium and common kinds are 35s
to 4Oc lower. stock calves csc e
CSC lower. Butcher cattle. canner'
and cutters are 10 to is lower. whiIs
beef steers are Is to 25 lower
The yards are full of stockers Al
this time and there is scarcery am
demand for them. The cattle mar.
ket in general II in bad shape JUS
at this time and we do not look fol
any improvement in the immediate
future.
With 2 thousand hogs on sale her,
today our market ruled 90 to 25 low.
er. Top 81. Bulk Of good hog
sold from se.75 to s6.an. light, mi,
ed kinds. ss.7O and pigs at IS /,
$3.50.
It looks no wiike the receipts vii
be heavy the balance OF the week a.
all points and prices will still &c
lower.
We would advise keeping In close
touch with conditions.
Yours very truly,
Cassidy Southwestern Commission
Company
Durant weekly news. (Durant, Choctaw Nation, Indian Territory [Okla.]) 190?-1944, 1914-12-04

Today the WelIs-Fargo Express Co.
office was moved to that Of the AM
er1can and the two will be operated
under the same management. Sam
d. stinson Of the American office is
to bo in charge of the consolidated
office. The affairs Of the two com-
panies will be kept separate but un-
der ore management. There will be
two wagons and two drivers.
Lee White. the wells-Fargo agent
has not announced his plans for the
future but will probably accept a
similar position with the company
elsewhere.