davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15
chinese Tona War.

limited Press Leased Wire Service.
SAN FRANCISCO. Calf, Nov. IA.
Two Chinese gun men were wound
ed in a Tong war which broke out
here tonight between Suey Sing Tong
and the Hop Sing Tong. The vic
tins were Wong Shen Cook and Len
Chong. Both will recover.
The police arrested Wong Wah, All
Sing and Aw Bow. All three had re-
yolvers in their pockets.
The shooting, coming as it did 81
simultaneously with the opening Of me-
gotiations for peace among the war
ring Tongs OF Portland, Ore, was
said by the police to bear sinister
aspect The victims OF the shooting,
however, denied that the Portland
war had spread here, asserting the
shooting was the outgrowth of the
theft of slave girl. They refused to
discuss the case in detail.
The San Francisco police, however,
were skeptical of the story told by
Wong Cook and Len Chong. They
believe that another Tong war is on
and have notified the authorities OF
Oakland, Los Angeles. Sacramento,
Fresno and Portland to look out for
further hostilities.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15
Neutrality impossible Herr.

Golfers Weekly: A singer in the
Dresden Royal opera writes to an
American friend of how the war prep
arations went forward in his city, and
says:
During the first two weeks l virtu-
ally lived in streets, and I never saw
any disturbance or man drunk. AS
O company was formed and put in
marching order, 1t was addressed by
the captain, who, in every case, ad-
vised the men that the greatest en-
envy was alcohol
The same story is told in the dis
patches from Austria, England, France
and Russia. II man must keep
sober during war in order to take
the lives OF others to the best advant-
age, why should he not keep sober In
time Of peace so as to bring his own
life to the best Of which 1t Is capable?
Alcohol is the greatest enemy in our
own United States.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15
The Spirit child.

CINCINNATI, Ohio, Nov. 14.-Inter.
est in Cincinnati's spirit child" mys-
terv was increased here today when
Albert Haus. teamster. charged IN
municipal court with drunkenness,
swore that he is the father of tho
spirit child" whom Louis Kraft, late
powerful politician recognized as his
son and named Louis Kraft, Jr. Hau5
was arrested when he tried to force
his way into DR.. Florien's hospital
where Dora Funk Guien, who says
she is the mother of the spirit child'
and has sued to get possession Of him.
is living temporarily. Mrs. Guien has
stated her first husband was man
named Haus and that he was the faith
err of the alleged spirit child Mrs.
Plymouth Weeks, a medium, who is
alleged to have presented Kraft with
the spirit child" when he expressed q
wish for an heir and who now has the
boy in her possession, is scheduled to
take the witness stand Saturday and
DENY she occurred the child from
hospital and presented him to Kraft.
Mrs. Weeks claims the child Is her
own son. "I'm here to prove this
child is NINE" Haus told Judge Prick.
Dora and me was living in Washing
ton Court House. Well she came down
to Iorin's hospital and that is where
the kid was born. They fetched me
down here and made me marry her.
After that we went back to washing
ton Court House." The story Of Haus
bears out that OF Mrs. Guien Kraft
in recognizing the child in his will as
sou. left $4,000 to the child.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15
Eouallv Matched.

Topeka Capital: 1t is still, after the
third month Of war, drawn fight. We
still constantly hear Of German eff
cheney. German marvels of scientific
preparation, the perfection Of German
discipline, the superiority Of German
guns, and we never hear of any Won
derful French or English or Belgian
efficiency. But with equal forces en-
gagged. It is drawn fight to date, so
that efficiency, scientific skill, dfsct-
pine and all the other qualities must
be pretty equally distributed among
the nations engaged
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15
Our Political croesuses.

Cedar Rapids Republican: The Dav-
export Times wants to know where
Hamilton and Connolly get their cam
paign money. That is the question
OF a newspaper simpleton. Both men
have money Of their own. Either one
of them could buy up both Davenport
newspapers and then have something
left for cup of coffee for their next
breakfast.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15

CHOICEST Montana land, dne sec
ton, all tillable, close to railroad
and schools, fine deep soil, excellent
building site. Will pay for itself from
two grain or diversified crops; will
sell in quarters, $4,000 per acre. easy
terms. Owners Big Spring Ranch
company, Helena, Montana.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15
Deer HuntInu AccIden Mt.

UNITED Press Leased Wire Service1
DULUTH, Mimi, Nov. 144.-L. u.
Polk, aged so. Of st. Paul, is in hos
pital here tonight, the result of a deer
hunting accident in which boy ac-
cidentally shot him through the ankle.
This is the third reported hunting &C
cident this season.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15
$50 Resolutions.

UNITED Press Leased Wire Service J
PHILADELPHIA, Nov. 14.-Wlth
$50 or more resolutions in committee
touching on every phase Of the labor
movement, the American Federation
OF Labor, holding Its thirty-fourth con-
vention here. tonight had its deck
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15

cleared for real action beginning Mon
day. Next week the convention will
centre its efforts on cleaning up every
resolution presented.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15

MEN AND WOMEN-Send Csc for In
formation about positions on the
Pacific coast, and the great worlds
fairs. Bureau B, 413 Henne Bldg, Los
Angeles, Calf.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15

FOR RENT-seven room house, mod
ern except furnace. Phone Blacl
1868.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15

FOR RENT-The ]. G. Davis property
on Grand avenue, beyond Rand park.
John Tumelty.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15

LADY to establish local agency State
business experience and references.
Opportunity for advancement. G. >.
Carbon & Ribbon Co., Detroit, Mich.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15

/ HAvD a contract to distribute
million free pkgs. Borax Soap Pow
der. Want reliable men and women
to help. $500 weekly. Waverly
Brown, 73O N. Franklin, Chicago.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15

$500 ANNUALLY--Co-operate with
me evenings at home. Everything
furnished. Don't worry about capital.
Boyd H. Brown, Omaha, Neb.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15

FOR RENT-Seven room house, Sec
ond and Bank Phona Black-51.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15

FOR RENT-Room and board, for one
or two, in private family. 211 South
Sixth.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15

FOR RENT-Two furnished rooms for
light housekeeping. Phone Red-626.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15

--Read The Daily Gate City. 10
cents per week. ssss
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15

WANTED Colored boy between ags
Ia and IS, for washroom work. Cal
1920 Main, upstairs.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15

WANTED Experienced man for dye
ing, cleaning and pressing. Call be-
fore noon Sunday. 1902 Main.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15

FOR RENT-Furnished room in mod.
ern home, 220 North Fourth.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15

WANTED Situation as house man,
capable of running and repairing
automobile. Can give reference. Ad-
dress ~. o." Gate City.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15

AGENTS WANTED: To sell and ap-
ply guaranteed roofing roofs or
shingles on monthly payments direct
to property owners for new or old
roofs. Big commission. Some agents
making $4,000 per week. Home dis
trict Consumers Roofing company.
Consumers Bldg, Chicago.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15

FOR RENT-Two furnished rooms for
light housekeeping, rent reasonable
Phone Black-1176.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15

DO EASY, pleasant colo-ing work at
home; good pay. no canvassing; no
experience required. Illustrated par
ticulars free. Helping Hand Stores.
Dept. S54, Chicago. .
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15
MiSCELLANEC GS.

EXCHANGE-Two large sunny un-
furnished rooms for light housekeep-
ing In exchange for services OF care
taker. Phone Black-301.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15

WANTED-Sm Small screw cutting lathe
in good condition. Address Lathe
care Gate City.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15
FOR RENT.

FOR enthusiastically furnished
apartment for housekeeping, includ-
ing piano; SIS per month. Call 727
North Ninth street.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15

FOR sALE-Chickering piano, latest
style, excellent condition. Cash or
payments. Phone Red-711.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15

FOR RENT-House, good furnace, ce
ment floor in cellar, modern plumb.
ing, hard wood floors. stationary laun.
dry tubs, gas and electric lights; fur.
nished or unfinished. Call at 727
North Ninth.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15

FOR RENT-Furnished or unfurnish-
ed house, seven rooms, 1914 Main.
Phone Black-3S8.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15

FOR SALE-Base burner, used one
season, practically new. 706 High
street.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15

WANTED-Co lored washwoman. Cal
1920 Main, upstairs.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15

WANTED-work by the day; wash
ing, ironing and sweeping. 1907
Timea street.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15

wANTED-To buy, hand poultry
feed grinder. Phone, 800 Black.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15

FOR SALE--Bull dog pups. Enquire
at Burke Bros, 61S Main street.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15

ABLE BODIED MEN. Good eyesight,
for firemen and brakemen. Good
wages; experience unnecessary. State
age. Railway, care Gate City.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15

FOR SALE-Art Garland base burn
err. Medium size, in splendid condi
ton. Inquire 1927 Reid street, OF
phone Black-1S9S.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15

FOR RENT-Three furnished house
keeping rooms at 725 Carroll, $3.50
per week; three rooms at 727 Carroll,
$500 per week, all on first floor. Phone
GAO, or enquire at 1909 Exchange
street c. L. Wallis.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15

HAVE YOUR weaving done at 1917
johnson St.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15

FOR RENT-Furnished rooms for
light housekeeping. Phone Black,
$50. Sos Ridge street.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15

FOR RENT-Furnished upper fiat,
five rooms and bath, $4,000 per
month: No. 1909 Fulton street. John
Tumelty.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15

LOST Black purse containing nearly
$500, between Younker's and Cen
trail. Return to Central store. Re-
ward.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15

FOR SAIlE-Good dry cord wood. E
T. Bartruff, GIG Main street.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15

FOR RENT-Two furnished rooms
with kitchenstt, modern, first ward,
overlooking river. Phone Black-301.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15

AGENTs-Make big money selling our
line OF specialties. Write for our
new catalog, and free sample. United
sales Co.. 420 South Fourteenth street,
Herrin, Ill.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15

FOR SALE-Good heating stove, soft
coal. e. T. Bartruff, SIG Main street
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15

FOR RENT-Five room house. Inquire
227 North Ninth.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15
FOR GALE.

FOR SALE-Good range cook stove
at 404 Timea street.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15
WANTED.

WANTED-Two young men Monday
morning to shuck corn. three miles
northwest Of Montrose, on the DR..
Wahrer farm. 8. F. Clemenson.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15
LOST.

LOST-Brown and white pointer pup.
11O4 Blondeau street or call 200. Re-
ward.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15

FOR SALD-Coal and wood stoves
in good condition, 50 to IS. 2l7
South Third street.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15

FOR RENT--Five room house. gas.
full lot, good barn, rent reasonable.
S24 North Twelfth.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15
THE WANT COLUMN

FOR SALE-Pool table, cheap. In
quire at SIC Palean st.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15

FOR RENT-Three furnished or un.
furnished rooms, $40 South Eighth
street.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15

FOR SALE--Modern six room house,
II North Twelfth street. Inquire on
premises or phone 221.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15

FOR RENT-Six room house, 529 Pal
can. Tele. Red-1S92. II. T. Flood.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15

FOR RENT-Furnished rooms FOL
light housekeeping. Phone Black
SAG. 1914 Des' Moines street.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15

FOR RENT-Modern room. 9o2 Con
cert.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15

FOR RENT-Furnished room, mod
ern, with private family. 1928 Frank
lin. Phone Red-1731.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15

FOR RENT-Room with board. 7ot
High street.
The daily Gate City. [volume] (Keokuk, Iowa) 1855-1916, 1914-11-15

FOR RENT-Two modern rooms for
light housekeeping. Phone B 1161.
The Bottineau courant. (Bottineau, Bottineau County, N.D.) 1895-1929, 1914-03-13

~OOSOU { ~0VO0F VOOuO VOV0S NJ az"
vised. "You might fall down some
thins-or something"
the stunning gowns coming down that
stair in state and the young men be-
low here agitated in their bosoms?"
NO. can't" said Mr.. Quimby
frankly.
II can't either, to tell the truth"
laughed Billy Masee. lie turned up
his collar. Its like picturing il sum
mer girl sitting OH an iceberg and
swinging her openwork hosiery over
the edge. | don't suppose it's neces-
sary to register. I'll 80 right up and
select my apartments"
1t was upon a suit OF rooms that
pore the number seven on their door
that Mr.. Magee's choice fell. A large
parlOr with a fireplace that IL few
blazing logs would cheer, a bedroom.
whose bed was destitute Of all save
mattress and springs. and y bathroom
comprised his kingdom.
Mr.. Magee inspected his apartment
Tue windows were all Of the low
French variety and opened out upon
a broad snow covered balcony which
was in reality the roof Of the first
door veranda. On this balcony Magee
stood a moment, watching the trees ON
Baldpate wave their black arms in the
wind and the lights of Upper Asque-
wan Falls wink knowingly up at him
Then he came inside. and his iOvesti-
cations brought him presently to the
tub in the bathroom.
Fine" he cried-'a cold plunge IN
the morning before the daily struggle
for immortality begins!"
He turned the spigOt. Nothing hap
pened.
Il reckon" drawled MIR. Qnimby
from the bedroom. you'll carry ycnE
cold plunge up from the we'll back Of
the inn before you plunge into 1t. The
waters turned OF. We can't take
chances with busted pipes:
"Of course" replied Magee les'
blithely. His ardOr WAS somewhat
dampened-a paradox by the failure
Of the spigot to gush forth a response
There's nothing I'D enjoy more thar
carrying eight pals Of water upstair,
every morning to get up An appetite
for-what? Oh. we'll. the Lord viii
provide. If we propose to heat mp tha
great American outdoors. Qnimby.
think it's time we had y dire"
Soon Quimby came hack with kin
The Bottineau courant. (Bottineau, Bottineau County, N.D.) 1895-1929, 1914-03-13

broad vsrandas. Mr.. Mage remarked
upUn them 20 bic companion.
Those porches and balconies and
things" be said. will come In handy
IN cooling the revered brow of genius
There amt much fever In this local
ity." the practical Qnlmby assured
him ".~p*~iai,y n III winter"
Iiicnrti. Mr.. Magre folinwpd the
'sutern Of Quimby ove the snow I"
the broad strtss. and M to the great
front door Their Mngrp rrodurssi
from beneath his toat an impressive
key. Mr. Quimby made as though +"
assist. but ri waved aside.
This ia y ceremony" Mr Magee
told him. some day Sunday nr~tspa
per stories wit BE- written at1pnt it.
Raldpate inn opening it, doors 10 the
great American novel"
He placed the key In the l".k. turned
1t. and the door swung open The
coolest blast Of air Mr.. Mag.S. had
ever encountered swept Oh, from the
dark interior
"Whew." hr cried. we've discover.
eO auOtner IOIc:
ITS stale air" remarked Quinby.
You 'an the in,ar atmospheric
replied Magee. YES. it is pretty
stale. Jack London and DR.. Cook
have worked it to death"
II mean" said Qui,nby. this air has
been in here alone o. long It's rs
stale as last weeks newspaper. w
couldn't heat It with a million fires
Wen have to let in some warm ali
from outside first"
Warm humph::" remarked Mr.
Magee. Well. live and learn"
The two stood together in a great
bare room. When they stepped for
ward the sound Of their shoes on the
hard wood seemed the boom tina
should wake the dead.
This Is the hotel otfice.' explained
MIR. Quimby.
At the left Of the door was thu
clerks desk. Behind it doomed a grea,
safe and a series OF pigeonhoies fol
the mail OF the guests. Opposite tn.
front door a wide stairway led to {
landing halfway up. where the stairs
were divorced and went to the RICH,
and left in search Of the door above
Mr.. Magee surveyed the stairway crit
ically.
"A great place." he remarked. tic
show OF the talents of your dressmak,
er. Ell. Quimby? Can't you just se<
The Bottineau courant. (Bottineau, Bottineau County, N.D.) 1895-1929, 1914-03-13
CHAPTER ~.
The Crack Of a Pistol.

w SsSSN ~ y y boSOos taf-.
r. MAGEE paused. For sharp
~ in the silence the bell Of his
room telephone rang out.
g He stood for a moment gaz-
ing in wonder, his heart beating swift
", his eyes upon the instrument on
the wall. 1t was a house phone. he
knew it could only be rung from the
switchboard in the hall below. "l'm
going mad already" he remarked and
took down the receiver.
A blur Of talk. an electric mutter-
ing, a click. and all was still.
Mr.. Aagee opened the door and step
ped out into the shadows. He heard
q voice below. Noaselessiy be: crepl
to the landing and gazed down intO
the 0f1ce. A young man sat at the
telephone switchboard. Mr.. Magee
The Bottineau courant. (Bottineau, Bottineau County, N.D.) 1895-1929, 1914-03-13
That Terrible Cow.

She was even more afraid Of cows
than most girls. so when she Spied n
placid amman recumbent under Il tree
peacefully chewing it's cud she ut first
refused to go through the pasture at
all. Her husband Gained her fears to
some extent and they started by. when
the cow slowly commenced to get up.
hind legs first. as they always. do. At
this the little lady shrieked with ter
ror and said:
"Oh. Bob. hurry. hurry! He is get,
ting ready to spring at us!"-New York
Globe.
The Bottineau courant. (Bottineau, Bottineau County, N.D.) 1895-1929, 1914-03-13

on Ba,dpate mountain ! won't put
you out tonight
See here. my FREUD" cried Mr.. Ma
gee. ''your grief has turned your head.
YOu won't put ue out tonight or to-
morrow. I'm here to stay. You're
welcome to do the same. II you like.
But you stay With tue. know you
are u maD Of courage. but 1t would
take at least ten men u courage to
put NE out Of Baldpate inn.
They stood ewing each other fur a
moment. BANDS thin lips twisted into
a sncer. Well see." be- said. Well
settle all that 10 the morning. His
tone took on 4 more friendly aspect.
I'm going to pick out q dowuy couch
in One Of these rooms" he said. land
lay me down to sleep. Say. ! could
greet a blanket like a long lost friend"
Mr.. Magee pro6ered some Of the Gov
ers that Quimby had given him and
accompanied Mr.. Bland to suit 10.
across the tall. With II brisk good
night Mr.. Magee returned to No. :.
But be made no move toward the
chilly brass bed in the inner room.
Instead he sat a long time by the fire.
He reflected on the events Of his first
few hours in that supposedly uninhab-
tied solitude where be was to he alone
with his thoughts. He pUndered the
way and manner Of the fippant young
man who posed us Il %iovelorn haber-
cashier and nnde whose t1ippancy
there was certainly an air of hostility.
Who was Andy Rutter. down in keu-
ton: What did the young man mean
when he asked if he should CLOSE up
shop" Who was "he" from whom
came the orders. and. most important
of all. what was in the package now
resting in the great safe:
MIR. Masee smiled. Was this the
stuff Of which solitude was made?
He threw nf his dressing gown and
began to unlace his shoes.
There has been too much crude
melodrama in my novels" ne reflected.
Its 50 easy to write. But I'm going
to get away from all that up here. I'm
going"
Mr.. Magee paused. with one shoe
poised in bis hand. For from below
came the sharp crack Of Il pistol, fol-
lowed by the crash Of breaking glass.
Oeceitful.
"Men are queer animals" said the
pessimist. They are all more OF less
deceitful."
"Oh. I don't believe that" replied the
opttmist. II think there are plenty Of
people who strive to be honest. I know
I do. and don't give myself credit for
being any better than the majority Of
men," -:
Then why do you ask me how my
health is every time We meet aud
stand around and look bored II l tell
you?'-Exchange. ..
The Bottineau courant. (Bottineau, Bottineau County, N.D.) 1895-1929, 1914-03-13

Overshot. ~ .s.
The parents of a ten-year-old boy had
80 much trouble making him hear their
calls while he was at play that they
decided his hearing was defective. So
they took him to a specialist.
The latter made several Of the Ordi-
nary tests, and the boy could hardly
hear a word. To all appearances there
was something radically wrong with
his hearing. Shaking his head, the
specialist walked into the far corner of
the room.
my boy" he said in a voice little
above a whisper, Here's a nickel"
The lad squirmed in his chair. A
grin spread over his c~Ountenance.
"You can't fool me with that blur"
he said.-New York Times.
The Bottineau courant. (Bottineau, Bottineau County, N.D.) 1895-1929, 1914-03-13
Heavier Ammunition.

Heavier Ammunition.
lis this the man we are to initiate
tonight" asked the illustri0us cOnduc-
tor.
1T u.s." replied the outside guard.
The illustriOus conductor walked
around the $50 pound candidate. is
spected him carefully and turned to4kls
assistant.
"Put the goat back" he said. land
bring me Z mule."-Chicago Tribune.
The Bottineau courant. (Bottineau, Bottineau County, N.D.) 1895-1929, 1914-03-13
A Madman's Strange Belief.

A Madman's Strange Belief.
An unfortunate maniac was confined
In one Of the Scottish lunatic asylums.
his particular infirmity being an un-
shakable belief that every day was
Christmas day and that he was din
ing sumptuously on turkey Or roast
beef and a good slice of plum pud-
ding. His real diet, however, was Of
the plainest. he being served twice
daily with a dish Of oatmeal porridge.
After daily describing to his atten-
dants the pleasures he had tasted in
his cut Of turkey or what not he as
regularly added. yet, somehow or
other, everything that l eat tastes Of
porridge." This story it was which
gave rise to the saying. "As ~palatable
as the madnan's p~orridge."