davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1914-06-17
Bemoan the Elimination
of the every Best" Lines
From the .River of Doubt

Two prominent playwrights walked
feyerishly up and down in their ofnces
this morning Their names are James
Hay, jr. and Frank P. Morse. and they
wrote the comedy The River of Doubt.
which was produced at the National
Press Club last night
Upstairs in the club rooms the actors
were receiving with calm dignity, the
plaudits Of their admirers. Upstairs peo-
pie were saying that the travesty on
Col. Roosevelts trip of exploration had
gone splendidly.
But these facts did not bring sense
of calm to the two authors. They were
displeased. And when authors of a COM
edy are displeased it is no time for an
interviewer to come around.
1T was a good show" said Mr. Hay
gloomily, as he kicked at the carpet.
Yes said the interviewer, consolingly
1T was a good show; everybody says it
was a good show
Il don't mean what was performed last
night snapped Mr.. Hay. His accents
were thunderous. Il mean the real play.
didn't see it. You didn't see it. No
body saw II. 1t never was played
That Old-Time Roar.
The age-old roar was coming forth
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1914-06-17

Within a few minutes MI. Hay and
Mr.. Morse would have Joined the myriad
of illustrious playwrights who, from
Shakespeare's time. have believed all
actors tear pa ssion to tatters and. incl
dentally, rip the lines and lining, out
of good dialogue.
objective memories" placated Mr.
Morse between gulps of ice water.
defective thunder" responded Mr.
Hay TT was a plain case of too mucf
extemporary collaboration"
He continued:
when l wrote that play
when we wrote it, you mean. inter
rupted Mr.. Morse modestly. Il wrote
the plot, you know"
Il said I wrote the play" said Mr.
Hay. coldly, land when anybody nnds
the plot 1 will retract the statement
Morse Is "Crushed Tragedian."
Mr.. Morse was crushed. Mr.. Hay pro-
ceeded.
When wrote that play l had def
mite idea in mind. 1t was that the dia-
logue would be funny. l toiled lihe-like
an installment house bill collector to have
these lines funny.
Then came the rehearsals. \ promi-
nent member of the cast would say, .Bry-
an wouldn't say that. And then he would
say what ne tnouSHt tiic SccfetdiS "
State would say.
Slowly, ominously, implacably, they
sneaked every line that l had written out
Of the show and transplanted their own
Then came the awful night Of dress re-
hearsal. l discovered that the only thing
I had written was the cast Of characters
/ clutched my hair"
Mr.. Morse gulped more ice water.
You couldn't he interjected. 'Yot
haven't enough hair to clutch
L clutched my hair, continued Mr.
Hay, transfixing Mr. Morse with glance
and / went away from there"
Joins the Funeral March.
Mr.. Morse left the water cooler for a
moment and joined Mr.. Hay in the FIJI.
neral march.
There was one bright spot in the play,
he said. The man who was to play the
part of the savage and register ignor.
ance was a distinct success
| Mr.. Hay cheered up slightly
The refreshments were excellent "
pointed out Mr.. Morse.
That is so.' said Mr.. Hay
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1914-06-17

the President receive commentator in
the resolutions.
| In letter to the President. Gen. King
says:
In addition to the veterans themselves
There are the Sons and Daughters of the
Confederacy. Junior cooperative organi-
cations. bring ing up the total number,
under the direct influence % the veterans
I To many hundreds of thousands all IN
support of you. Mr.. President. But this
! Is not all. These veterans al this criti-
cal moment pledge you the sympathy and
support of their wives and daughters.
and the support of their sons, and all
within the orbit of their lives-home and
abroad. In the latter they have many
/ scions, all loyal and devoted to the
cause which YOU representative cause OF
our country.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1914-06-17

7:1S a.m.-Started into lower lock cham
ber
TBS a.m.-Ship in place in lower lock
chamber.
closed.
7:32 a.m.-Started to fill lower aock
chamber.
T:43 a.m.-Lower lock chamber filled
7:45 a.m.-Gates to middle lock opened.
1:47 a.m.-Ship started into middle lock
chamber.
7:55 a.m.-Ship in place in middle lock
chamber.
1851 a.m.-Gates to middle lock cham
Der closed.
a.m.-Started to fill upper lock cham
Der.
Sill am.-Upper lock chamber full
S:12 a.m.-Gates to upper lock chamber
opened.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1914-06-17

Brazil. Roosevelt himself wore a
khaki suit and big campaign hat.
Having been told that somebody
doubted his discovery. he fired revolver
lining with the 1eaden missiles the
course of the River of Doubt. This
slightly overawed the court.
Why did you name your discovery
the River of Doubt" inquired Mr..
Bryan in rough voice.
Because its foreign" said the col
onel, Gnashing a tooth.
Whats that got to do with it?' pur-
sued Bryan. contemptuously.
Because said Roosevelt trium-
phantly, its in keeping with the pres
emit foreign policy of the United States"
Exhibits Sample Bottle of Water.
Finally. worn out by the cross-Gues-
tioning and .hectoring. the colonel said
he had brought back a bottle of water
from the River of Doubt, and he would
dispel all doubts by having Dr.. Wiley
analyze the precious fluid. Wiley step
ped forward. his bearing indicating that
he faced tremendous crisis.
The lights were turned down The or
chestra played soft, slow music. Every
body watched the experiment in tense
silence. The doctor emptied the radium
into the glass. The water rushed up
the sides of the glass and spilled on the
floor Tie thing was immense.
The yodeiing scene occurred in the
second act. Following discussion as to
who was the greatest authority on ex-
ploration, Bryan remarked that the man
who makes the most money out Of it IS
the greatest explorer. However, he said,
no one could qualify as a lecturer until
he had given an opinion on yodeling.
And Tyrolean started to yodel. HIS
performance affected Bryan exactly as a
war horse is moved by the sound OF
trumpets.
Vaults Over the Table.
With a loud shout the Secretary Of
State vaulted over the counsel table,
leaped down to the footlights and rushed
headlong into a Chautauaua lecture
about 1.-The prince of peace" and the
making of a man.
The remainder of the burieeque was
given up TO refined and high-grade but
utterly slap-stick political comedy, and
ended with terrific Rooseveltian broad
side in which the colonel was made 10
declare: -,
And with a pleasure which ! can III
conceal l. watch Mr. Bryan and WOOD
row Wilson working their heads on 70
make me the next President OF 'he
njted States.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1914-06-17
Official Report OF Trip.

Official reports received in Washington
show that the ship went through the
Gatum lock without a hitch in sixty-four
minutes. The log of the Alliance for the
trip Is as follows:
sos a .m.-Entered Atlantic approach to
canal
6:s5 a.m.-Entered lower level of Gatun
locks.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1914-06-17
M'CARR|CK BOY FOUND
FLOATING IN A RIVER
Mother Identifies Clothing of Child
Missing Since March 12-Foul
Play Suspected.

PHILADELPHIA, June 1.-THE mys-
terry surrounding the whereabouts of
seven-year-old Warren McCarrick who
disappeared from his home here March
Il, was solved yesterday when the boy s
body was found floating in the Delaware
river. All doubt as to the identity of the
body was removed when the child's moth
er visited the morgue and identified the
clothing as that which he had worn on
the day he was last seen alive. The tuck
she had made in the waistband of his
underwear and the darning in the only
remaining stocking convinced her that
the skeleton was that of her son.
The rubber hip boots and REFER Goa,
which he wore when he disappeared were
not on the body when it was found. but
the police officials believe that they were
washed away by the action of the water
They are convinced that the lad acct
dentally fell into the Schuylkill river nea,
his home. the body being washed down te
the Delaware and carried up the latter
river by the ascending tides.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1914-06-17
PRESIDENT APPLAUDED.
Confederate Veterans Association
Adopts Resolutions of Support.

President Wilson has received from
Gen. j. FLOYD King of this city a copy
of the resolutions adopted by the United
Confederate Veterans Association at
Jacksonville last month unfolding the
Presidents course as to Mexico and
pledging him support in whatever he
does.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1914-06-17

A d O s e 0 {
Penslar l. V e T
Saline will re-
store your liver
to proper activ-
ity and cleanse
the system of
waste material.
Invest 25c in a
bottle at once.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1914-06-17
PASSING Of STEAMER
THROUGH CANAL LOCKS
Trip of the Alliance Described by
Washington Woman, an
Eye Witness.
Another Resident of Capital Pas
senger Aboard the Vessel-Record
of Time Made

The Star today received from Cristobal
Canal Zone. a letter from Washington
! woman sojeHrning there, who watched
the progress June s of the first ocean
going steamship through the Panama
canal locks and whose sister-in-law, also
Washington woman, visiting the Canal
through the locks
The ship was the Allianca and the
letter, mailed on this vessel during the
| trip of this first oceaR-going steamship
to pass through the canal locks, was
afterward brought to New York aboard
| that vessel.
s, is in part follows:
| AT 61J am we were sitting over
our coffee when our attention was drawn
| to what appeared to be a small gray
| hulled boat coming rapidly up the canal
from Colon 1t proved to be the steam
ship Allianca. which was recently chosen
as the : first ocean steamer to pass
through the Gatun locks, in order to
thoroughly test out the electric towing
| engines or mules, as they are called
We were glad that the warmth of the
tropics calls one out early in the morn
ing, otherwise we would have missed this
( unique event.
| Ships are not allowed to pass through
| the locks under their own power. but are
drawn by electric locomotives operating
on the tracks on the lock walls.
Treat for EARLY Risers.
| ut was only a short time before the
i ship was at the Atlantic entrance of the
| locks We hastily dressed and joined the
| little band of early risers which had
already collected. From the control
/ house we watched the progress Of the
| Alliance toward the Pacific and when
she finally f1oated into Gatun lake group
Of canal officials and enthusiastic Ameri-
| can citizens greeted her.
! Having had a number of trips through
the locks. / personally did not accept the
offer of the captain to take many as
| cared to accompany him back to Colon,
| but my husbands sister who is visiting
| us from Washington accompanied him.
| and reports safe voyage over the seven
| miles.
THE Alliance will sail from Cristobal
tomorrow at 3 pm. for New York, carry
| ing as a part of her cargo this letter to
| our home.
'The passage of this ship through the
locks came at an opportune time for me,
as only yesterday l had listened to an
| interesting address made before the Elec-
! tricaf Society of the isthmus on lock con-
troll. The meeting was held in the con-
| troll house OH the lock walls and a
| complete demonstration of the workings
of the control board, etc. given
| Moving pictures were taken of the
event of today and the world will soon
see what we viewed. A. G. s NJ"
| Official Report of Trip.
Official reports received in Washington
show that the ship went through the
| Gatum lock without a hitch in sixty-four
minutes. The log of the Alliance for the
| trip Is as follows:
6:03 a.m.-Entered Atlantic approach to
| canal.
~, E,&arod 1oyaI of
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1914-06-17
Invest Idle Money.

You should invest that idle
money of yours in one of those
well built homes advertised at
a sacrifice in The Star.
See list of best Real Estate
offerings in Classified Column
of tOday's paper.
Telephone your Want Ads to
The Star. Phone Main 244O.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1914-06-17

The age-old roar was coming forth
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1914-06-17
Caresses His Back Hair.

This somewhat upset Mr.. Bryan. who
caressed his extreme back hair, in
which was seen a nest used for hatch
ing out doves. His disturbance was
Increased by d terrific clamor outside
falling glass. tremendous reverbera-
tons and four revolver shots in quick
succession. This chorus prefaced the
arrival of Col. Roosevelt, accompanied
by two red headed negro natives of
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1914-06-17
N0LONGER A HAZE
ON RIVER OF DOUBT
Reliability of Col. RooseveIt's
Claim of Discovery Estab-
|ished by Experts.
BOARD IN EXTRA SESSION
At NATIONAL PRESS CLUB
Newspaper Men Principals in Bur
lesque observation-disclosures
Galaxy of Talent on Stage.

That there isn't the least bit of doubt
as to the actually of the River of
Doubt: that there can he no doubt that
Col. Roosevelt really discovered the
River of Doubt: that the stream was not
q rather doubtful fall of dew, and that
doubts cast on the announced discovery
have had their genesis in the racial
jealousy of certain foreign seoSraphers
and cartographers were the conclusions
to be drawn from the play staged at the
National Press Club last night. Some
doubt may exist as to the authorship OF
the play. and the question as to whom
belongs the credit for staging the per
Torrance NAV also be doubtful; but no
body doubts that the newspaper men who
enacted the numerous difficult roles in
the burlesque know several things about
stagecraft and few other things De
sides writing pieces for the papers.
Frank Morse known to fame as
writer of dramatic critiques, and James
HAY, jr., better known as Jimmie
uay, whose name has appeared at the
top of quite number of magazine afti-
cles and other productions. are credited
with being the authors However. there
we're those last night who expressed
doubt on that point. Be these things as
they may, the burlesque established pc
yond the shadow OF doupt that Soi
Roosevelt really did discover the afore-
mentioned river. that the stream runs
uphill-on that point bearing close re-
semb.ance to the tempestuous career OF
the party of which the colonel is declared
to be the head-and that the shorter ana
uglier word precisely fits those arrogant
scientists who have presumed TO linpush
the veracity of the worlds most famous
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1914-06-17

40 feet, and draws $50 feet of water She
is of 1905 tons burthen.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1914-06-17

s:2s a.m.-ship in place in upper lock
chamber
s:25 a-m.-Gates to upper lock chamber
closed.
S:39 a.m.-Upper lock chamber full and
gates to Gatun lake opened.
s:42 a.m.-Ship towed out of upper lock
chamber.
S:4s a.m.-Ship cast off by towing en-
gines and proceeds under own steam.
June 6. 1914.
Carried 1900 Tons of Cargo.
The vessel belongs to the Panama Rail
road Company. The test was made by
order of Col. Goethals. When the vessel
went through the locks she had 1900
tons of cargo aboard.
The ship is .3S36 feet long. has beam of
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1914-06-17
Father Still Suspects Foul Play.

The boys father, however, is still of
the belief that his son may have met
with foul play. He has engaged q physi-
clan to represent him at the official au-
topsy and the examination of the body
will be made as complete as POSSIBLE.
Although at the time young McCarrick
disappeared detectives who investigated
the case reported that they believed he
had been accidentally drowned thousands
of clues We're. run out in an effort to APP
prehend possible kidnapers.
Rewards aggregating 5000 were offered
for his recovery and his photograph and
description were displayed on moving pic
ture screens. in store windows and in
newspapers in all parts of the country.
Many false clues were received recent
ly. several coming from New York and
Canada.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1914-06-17
"GIittering Galaxy"

The cast of characters in last night S
play included the following giltter1n2
galaxy of stellar talent:
Col Theodore Roosevelt, the hero
T. Stewart.
Secretary of State Bryan. presiding
over the court of inquiry-Angus Early
Gift Pinchot. the colonefs counsel
Howard Acton.
Lord KILT. who denies that rivers run
uphill-George T. Odeil.
Sir Blastem in the pay of the map
makers-Claude H. Bennett.
DR. Harvey W. Wiley. expert on
river water-Graften F. Wilcox
Dr. Cook an expert on discoveries
Raymond B. Morgan.
Admiral Peary. an expert on discoveries
Stanley Reynolds.
Mason a newspaper reporter. j..
DAILY.
Signor Whistle-it-up, a Tyrolean yode-
Ier-Edwin Callow.
Natives of the River of Doubt-Joseph
P. Amin and E. B. Johns.
Mechanical force-JameS D. Preston.
The board of experts, which determined
the question of the discovery. as the hast
shows, was composed of Cook and Peary,
Gin Pinchot and two Enghshmen. The
play started off with great solemnity-
Doves of Peace in Evidence.
Secretary Bryan took his seat at the
mead Oh The counsel anu, as ne ulu
SO, the ample folds of his frock coat were
loosened. facilitating the escape of two
white doves of peace, which, as is his
custom he was carrying around with him.
After shedding bitter tear because OF
this loss Secretary Bryan ushered to their
chairs the principal witnesses and at
torneys in the case-Peary. who had
under his arm cage containing his pet
polar bear: Doc Cook. who was nursing
the remains of an iceberg which he had
brought as souvenir from the north
pole. the two Englishmen. who polished
their monocles and bawled out the colonel,
and Gift Pinchot who bled every time
somebody wounded the colonel
Mr.. Secretary said Lord Killit speak
ing with bored emphasis and gouging out
an eyelash with his monocle Great
Britain is displeased. All. do not finch
] do not refer to the hardness regarding
the Panama canal tolls. | complain
against the colonel having dared to ooze
river through South America and
contend that the colonel must show cause
at once why the River of Doubt. which
he says he put on the map. should not be
wiped off the map.
And. ! say, old top-I mean Mr.. Sec
retary. drawled Sir Blastem, 4 charge
that this Roosevelt person ran into one
of the heavy dews in Brazil No
river, don't you know-just dew
Honolulu star-bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1912-2010, 1914-01-21
MAI. WILLIAMS
TOHAVEGHARGE
Of TOURNAMENT

Major Herbert o. Williams. I'd iD-
fantry, has been detailed to take full
charge Of the military tournament and
athletic meet that Is to be held at
kapiolani park the afternoon Of Feb
ruary 90 Major Williams has just
been designated by the department
commander for this duty, and with the
program recently framed by the board
of which Major E. V. Smith was chair
man, Major Williams win have the
chance TO present to HOnolulans one
of the most interesting military shows
ever staged on Oahu, or anywhere
else, for that matter.
ALI arms of the service are to be
represented in the five exhibition
events, which. with the four cCmpeti-
tive events. lake up the afternoons
program. Infantry. cavalry. field ar
tillery, engineers and signal corps will
be seen in action, while teams from
the various organizations will COM
pete in wall scaling. relay races, tug
of war. and the field events. Alto
gether, the afternoons sport promises
to be of great interest to civilians and
service people alike, and will undoubt-
eddy give to many a clearer insight
into what the army of Oahu is doing
day in and day out.
The list of prizes is so arranged that
every individual on a winning team
will receive S., while the share per
man of the second team will be 81.
The I'd battalion, I'd infantry, Ma
jor Lehman, has been selected to give
the exhibition rifle drill, or Butts man
ual, to music To see four companies
acting as one man in this drill is some
thing worth while.
Honolulu star-bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1912-2010, 1914-01-21
SPLENDID EXAMPLE or INTELLIGENT GIVING

BY the terms of the will of the late Charles
nrneaux, recently published, Oahu College is
uned as a residuary legatee and eventually is
receive the funds of the estate after certain
her provisions are satisfied
AS Mr.. Furneaux was thoroughly familiar
It'll the plans and work of Oahu College, by
lis hequest he gives substantial expression to
satisfaction in this work and to his desire
at il shall grow and prosper, This is an exam
e Of generous giving which may we'll be fol
wed by our wealthy and philanthropic! citizens
II only by provisions in their Wills hut better
gifts which may be enjoyed while the donors
e still alive. <>~s
Oahu College has come to be so large part
the community assets that its Importance and
needs are not always freely appreciated by
h people OF the community which it serves so
fll To over seven hundred children from the
aling families Of the islands 1t gives atnotably
bad and effective education at q price for tut.
on which is less than onehan OF what ii costs
furnish it. This is made possible by endow,
lent given by the wealthy friends of the school.
ne liberal policy of the trustees, which seeks to
axe the school serve the community in the
oadest way, is deserving of recognition by
lose who can afford to give IL hard times come
Hawaii, Pnnahou, whose work is always
aching out into broader fields, will feel their
feet and will need support Mr. Furneanx has
+ timely example to those who desire that the
nth Of Hawaii shall have under favorable cir
instances the opportunities for a liberal edu-
ton ys
Honolulu star-bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu, Hawaii]) 1912-2010, 1914-01-21
PUBLICITY FOR TIE SMALL FARMER

Or. e. Y. Wilcox's address before the AID
l0b Yesterday contained this unforgettable sen
Cant the interests which are represented al
rs meeting appoint, not a mere whoop-it-ur
Hnmittee, but a get-togetherg t.to-work .and-do
Mlcthing committee III.
The result of his address was the appointment
committee consisting of l. A. Thurston, Al
ft Horner and r. w. Shingle, to take up the
d Club campaign for the small farmer. The
aleup of the committee suggests that it is able
9TH to whoop it up and to get together, get to
York and do something -
The statement is made that what the federal
<periment station here needs is more publicity
Nat is only one of the needs, and possibly the
a Club itself hardly realizes the extent of the
nhlicity given in the press of Hawaii to the fed
al station, particularly since the last legislas
ire placed the station in charge of the territor
marketing division The daily papers have
pely given innumerable columns of space and
1T as freely volunteer to continue giving it.
ne Star Bulletin is publishing articles about
Be stations work at least four times a week
fPraging perhaps a column long; and in adj
ition is printing its weekly market and produce
port, all free of charge Moreover, column aft,
column is devoted throughout the week to spe.
fal correspondence in which the problems and
eFelopments Of diversified agriculture in Ha-
hi are discussed at length, and the editorial
age frequently is largely devoted to the same
objects. This paper believes in the station and
s work, in the future of small farming in this
rritory, in the vital need for encouraging the
rowerlof garden stuff and general produce, and
as gladly bent it's energies toward giving pub
city to the work of the experiment station.
The press of Hawaii has stood and now
tands ready TO give CORDIAL cooperation to DR..
Wilcox and the experiment station. Publicity is
ne ofsthe few Kinds of cooperation that the eX-
eriment station has had in past. The Adj Clubs
reatest service can be found in systematic and
nergetic development of a ''follow-up campaign
i which the small farmer will he consulted as to
he disadvantages and the handicaps he is up