davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The broad ax., 1914-09-26

In the matter Of war neither nigh
nor dynamite makes right
The broad ax., 1914-09-26

~He is q self made man, Is he nOtT
Eyes, except for the alterations made
by his wife and her mother.
The broad ax., 1914-09-26

AG0, SEPTEMBER s6, 1914.
~Who are those people who are
eheeringY' asked the recruit a. the sol
diers marched TO the train.
Those" replied the veteran, are
the people who are not gotng."-Fuek.
h eaIls on her no more fhe mutt
Rsgards the giri with SeoFn-
Ha thought she Was q fairy. but
shs stepped o. his pet corn.
Cincinnati Enquirer.
sWhat makes the beautiful brook
bound from rock TO rock, dearestT'
-Frs fun Of spring water. darling
Philadelphia Ledger.
Late to your bed
And early 70 rise
Win give you more time
For swatting the flies
-Yonkers Statesman
%He Is q self made man, Is he nOtT
Eyes, except for the alterations made
by his wife and her mother."-Judge.
In poker speech there's many q grin
Beyond the slightest doubt
One loser says he's ten bucks In.
Which means he's that much out
Detroit Free Press
They tried the new play on the
dog"
with what resultsT'
"HowlIng success. Amer
The doctor didn't have q dina
"Oh. how b business. sir?'' We cried
There's nothing doing yet but I'm
A patient waiter" he replied
New York Mail
Patience-How In the world do you
succeed In forgetting thingsT
Patrice-ReaIly, don't remember
Yonkers Statesman
Twinkle. twinkle. little star.
Like a diamond. up 50 far.
A celestial Jewel set
Maybe We win tax you yet
Washington Post
Gabe-The boss II looking for q man.
ager,. but he can't get any one capable
Of filing the position
Stsve-why doesn't he get married.
Cincinnati Enquirer.
A pulling vAgRy
Comes 20 my mind
The head Of the family
Il always behind.
Buffalo News
How IL Jaggs succeeding in drown
ing his troublesr
"He was complaining this morning
Of that sinking feeling"
L4vss Of fellnes al remind Us.
Had We each nine lives apiece.
What q mess we'd leave behind n
On our ultimate dsceass!
New York Evening sun
-Mr. Green has called to pay his re-
spects to you. sir"
Disappointed again thought he'd
come to pay me that ten be owes
Detroit Free Press.
Take anything" he aslsed his friend. for
that bad cold and chinr'
Thought you were on the wagon" sAid
the friend "of cOurss viii"
Dallas News
~HoW did you get along playing Solf
with your wifeT
well. at the ninth hole she was
about 1900 words ahead-"-Life.
After much Improvement
In weapons made to kin
There's old fashioned Cupid
With bow and arrows stilll
-Cleveland Plain Dealer.
Mistress - Why did you place the
alarm clock beside the pan Of dough.
Mary7
Mary-So Il would know what time
to rise, mum.-Boston Transcript.
I've often bean. win oonfssA
Quite scared before ! saw
That my especial bug-a-boo
Was but q man Of straw.
New York Times
The Sire-Your reckless course spells
ruin.
The Son-Spelling always came easy
to me.-Exchange-
At houseWork dainty Mabel stopG-
She says she knows not how.
The only thing she ever mopa
In. now and then. hsr brow.
Detroit Free PresA
Il hear the 80 captain Il in hard
heck. He married q girl, and she ran
away from him"
Yes; he took her for q mate. but
The broad ax., 1914-09-26

Italy must be waiting until they a.
fer trading stamps.
The broad ax., 1914-09-26

China still sits by the "open door,
wondering what Is going to blow In
next
The broad ax., 1914-09-26

A hard worked man n william Larch
He n q busy slob.
He hnSties round each day N search
OF some nice eaSy Job.
Cincinnati EnqulF0R.
The broad ax., 1914-09-26

The doctor didn't have q dina
'Oh. how b business. SIR We cried
There's nothing doing yet. but I'm
A patient waiter" he replied
New York Nail
The broad ax., 1914-09-26

A woman always wants another No
man to help her keep a secret
The broad ax., 1914-09-26

A frogs front lsss are short ana aSW.
HIS hind legs can't Be beaten.
And Jet his sloW Len gst away.
Whils the Swift are caught and saten.
Nov York AAl1
The broad ax., 1914-09-26

The industrious man prays for work;
the lazy man for . snap
The broad ax., 1914-09-26

War Is Just as bloody, no matter
which side seems 10 be winning.
The broad ax., 1914-09-26

At least the Swiss navy win not do
anything to eomplicate tie situation
The broad ax., 1914-09-26

A mans appetite gives doctors an
opportunity to experiment at his ex-
pense.
The broad ax., 1914-09-26

RntsrOd - oSoSaA-Claas AsttsR Az. =.
ia, q g. RaSG O8eS - Chieagos ultnoia.
unaR Al 81 March = 1SU.
The broad ax., 1914-09-26

No real hustler II satisfied with tn
things that come TO those who wait
The broad ax., 1914-09-26

Some fellows strike out for them
selves, while others depend on a pinch
hitter.
The broad ax., 1914-09-26

II there Is anything glorious at all
about war II Is the Red Cross nurse.
The broad ax., 1914-09-26

Cheer up! Sunshine win eventually
puncture the thickest cloud.
The broad ax., 1914-09-26

In this war nothing is sure but
death in Europe and taxes in America
The broad ax., 1914-09-26

Late TO your bed
And early 70 rise
win give you more time
For swatting the flies
-Yonkers Statesman
The broad ax., 1914-09-26

Love 3 blind, isn't itTs
80 they say"
Then bow about lore at Arst EiehtP
Baltimore American.
The broad ax., 1914-09-26

Peace doves are now mighty vary OF
their wings.
The broad ax., 1914-09-26

A wonanS birthday e . fact. but
her age II fiction
The broad ax., 1914-09-26

Patience-How In the world do you
succeed In forgetting thingsr
Patrice-Really, l don't remember
Yonkers Statesman
The broad ax., 1914-09-26

Il hear the ssa captain ID in hard
lpck- he married q GIRL and she nan
away from him"
Yes; he took her for q mate. but
she was q skipper."-London Tit-BitS-
The broad ax., 1914-09-26

I've often bean. I WIN oonfesA
Quite scared before ! saw
That my especial bug-a-boo
Was but . man Of straw.
New York Tines
The broad ax., 1914-09-26

At houseWork dainty Mabel stops.
She says she knows not how.
The only thing she ever mop8
II. now and then. her brow.
Detroit Free PresA
The broad ax., 1914-09-26

How IL Jaggs succeeding In drown
ing his troublesT
HE was complaining this morning
Of that sinking feeling"
The broad ax., 1914-09-26

The Sire-Your reckless course spells
ruin.
The Son-Spelling always came easy
to me.-Exchange.
The broad ax., 1914-09-26

After much Improvement
In weapons made to kin
There's old fashioned Cupid
With bow and ALLOWS Btilli
Cleveland Plain Dealer.
The broad ax., 1914-09-26

"HoE did you get along playing SOlf
with your wifeT
well, at the ninth hole she was
about 1900 words ahead-"-Life.
The broad ax., 1914-09-26

L4ves OF fellnes al remind Us.
Had We each nine lives apiece.
What . mess we'd leave behind ~
On our ultimate deceased
New York Evening sun
The broad ax., 1914-09-26

"Mr. Green has called to pay his re-
spects to you, sir"
Disappointed again thought he'd
come to pay me that ten be owes
Detroit Free Press.
The broad ax., 1914-09-26

Take anything" he asEed his friend. for
that bad cold and chinF'
Thought you were on the wagon" sAld
the friend 'Of course I VIII"
Dallas News
The broad ax., 1914-09-26

Mistress - Why did you place the
alarm clock beside the pan Of dough.
Mary7
Mary-So Il would know what time
to rise, mum.-Boston Transcript.
The broad ax., 1914-09-26

A puExitng vAgRy
Comes 20 my mind
Ths head Of the family
Il always behind.
Buffalo News
The broad ax., 1914-09-26

Gabe-The boss Is looking for q man
ager,. but he can't get any one capable
Of filing the position
Steve-why doesn't he get marriedT
Cincinnati Enquirer.
The broad ax., 1914-09-26

Twinkle. twinkle. little star,
Like q diamond. up 50 far,
A celestial Jewel set
Maybe We win tai you yet
Washington Post
Abbeville progress. (Abbeville, Vermilion Parish, La.) 1913-1944, 1914-08-29
Community Cooperation
COPYRIGHTED FARM AND RANcHyoLLAND'S MAGAZINE
NJ. NJ. CARRICK

. if Mahomet will not come TO the
mountain, the mountain will come
TO MOhamct. and he is as good as
his word. Perhaps we say, We'll,
what is the difference? My patron
age will not be missed. But don
/ be so sure. There is difference"
Just as much as there is between
two substractcd from four.
We may not have realized the
fact. but orr duty lies to our local
merchant. Is it right for us not to
extend to him our patronage and
support, and to practically put him
on Of business because our fancy,
or 4hc selfish within of a moment
bcCkonS us elsewhere?
First of all, he is Il good citizen
and he deserves your patronage.
Were he to leave the community,
and make his Observation-Disclosures,
his moral and financial support
would be missed, for III times past
no one III town responded more
generally to charity, plans for civic
bcttcrment or any individual or
community need. If he does not
do so now, there is a reason. He
has nothing but pearls" to offer.
If YOU would but realize it, YOU
have much to thank your local
merchant for, and the only way
you can show your appreciation is
by patronizii & him.
You will admit, if you are fair,
| am sure, that you have been
duped numerous times by the
mail-Order Eou>e, and that the
goods you purchased ut the city
store on the impulse of the moment
did not come up to your expectation
when you viewed them against the
background of your own home. III
fact, when you compared them
with goods III the show window of
your local merchant, they were
weighed in the balance and found
wanting"
That is why | would suggest
that you visit your home store
first, hereafter, and sec if ycu can
not find what you need before
going elsewhere. 1t will pay you
in the end. This will encourage
the merchant TO again cooperate
with you i'll the upbuilding and
lettering of the community in
which you are both interested.
Abbeville progress. (Abbeville, Vermilion Parish, La.) 1913-1944, 1914-08-29
The Louisiana
Potato Patch

The Louisiana Irish potato patch
contains $4,000 acres this year and
the total production will be APP
prOXimatcly 1,673,OOO bushels,
according to estimates as made
by the United States Crop Re
porting Board. The condition of
the crop is 81 per cent of normal
and the price at the present time
is averaging around IS cents per
bushel.
In Continental United States
there are 3,70S,OOO acres planted
to this product and this years
production is estimated at 36O,-
Ola, 900 bushels by the Federal
Department of Agriculture. This
years crop will exceed the average
crop of the past five years by APP
proximately 1000, 900 bushels.
The nations production last year
was 33l $4,000 bushels. was pro-
duced on 3,66S, 900 acres of land
and sold for S227 ,eO3, 900, or all
average of 90 cents per bushel.
Abbeville progress. (Abbeville, Vermilion Parish, La.) 1913-1944, 1914-08-29

Alas. they are only pearls. -
said the travelrr on a desert dcs-
pairinglv, as he tore open the
lcthcr flask at his feet and tossed
the pearls to the four winds. What
good were jewels to a man on a
desert who was dying for water to
qucnch his thirst, and food 10
assua&c his hunger?
The progressive tradosman who
has not the patronage of the com
munitv in which he lives is as
much i'll a desert land as the
traveller. lie may carry the same
class Of merchandise as the better
city stores, and Conscicntiously
offer the public trademarked. adj
vertised goods of known quality,
but his pearls" do him and the
community no good, if they will
not buy.
There are two reasons for this, ---
the distant mail-ordcr house and
the large city store, the former
made alluring to us by clcvcrly
wordcd advertising;thc latter made
by interrurban cars and
electrified railways. Then there is
the 'itincrant" merchant who says
Abbeville progress. (Abbeville, Vermilion Parish, La.) 1913-1944, 1914-08-29
Stands Out Conspicuously

provided that it contains facts that appeal to the reader
Every classifcaoi.of the small ads is subject to
the rule The reader, to whom it carries message
finds the little "ad readily the big But when
found, it should really convey its messagcand i'll this
respect the classified advertiser sometimes makes undue
economy of words defeat his purpose To be brief, and
still be explicit is possible yet the aim at brevity
often obscures the meaning.
Write your message ceary-and it will reach the
very people to whom it is addressed
Abbeville progress. (Abbeville, Vermilion Parish, La.) 1913-1944, 1914-08-29
Classification Does 1t!

The ''littlest ads might have, indeed, sorry time to
make themselves conspicuous if they not classified
But proper classification, under the head which
Belongs makes the task of finding the small ad' simple
and casythc work of few minutes, at most
Every person looking fora furnished turns to
the Furnished Rooms To Let classification as matter of
course---and, thus the two or three lines 'ad"
Abbeville progress. (Abbeville, Vermilion Parish, La.) 1913-1944, 1914-08-29
Railroad Time Table.

EAST BOUND.
No. sos motor car, leaves 7:lS a. III.
No. 500 passenger, leaves 9:37 a. III.
WEST BOUND.
No. sos passenger, leaves 2:G5 p. M.
No. 500 motor car. arrives 5:55 p. III.
Abbeville progress. (Abbeville, Vermilion Parish, La.) 1913-1944, 1914-08-29

Bargains In Real Estate
Location for a doctor or merchant,
near Nunez La.
81 bearing orange trees, near Cow
Island, La.
Read the hist below. You may find exactly what you
are hunting for.
No. 40 acres with improvements, on
the drainage transportation Abbeve Lake Arthur
and other places 81 bearing enough wood the place
TO for it, This place offered exceptionally low price
No. 10 IL qrpen with good improvements near Nunez
o. good location for merchant Price sacrifice
The improvements alone worth 81 600.
No. 3, IA arpents with improvements near Milton p O.
Enough wood the place cash payment and
balance on terms suit purchaser
No g. Town properties in le Crowley payable on
monthly inslments.
l6 apents we'll improved, the Fourth ward and near
LeRoy r. o. about miles school, best corn and
cotton land in the by the Hunter canal
free from red about be made on the MACE
Tract will be divided into smaller purchaser or privilege
of taking the whole Some of M land bought low as SEQ
Per afoeat
For uhe niornqti9p particulars call on or write to
JOS. N. PREJEAN,
Maurice, La.
Abbeville progress. (Abbeville, Vermilion Parish, La.) 1913-1944, 1914-08-29

Tie shortest is easy to find, i'll the Telephone
Directory, IS the longest
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1914-10-22

for the most part homc-loving, home
owning citizens. members OF that
class OF society which make for the
pcrmancncy ofthe city and its instl-
tutions. And this homecoming pro-
clivity extends to all classes ~ the
rich and the poor, the manuEactur-
or and the laborer. the business man
and the wage eurner-homc owners
are found in each OF these classes.
And this happy state has been made
possible through the efforts of some
of our big developers. men who have
provided the means and the meth
DDS for the laborcr and wage Garner
to own his home and pay for 1t
while he is enjoying the home com
rcrts; men who have converted the
ruughncss of the hills and the hol-
lows into the beautiful building lots
and home sites. These providers
arc the men who have become OF
greatest value to Fairmont. who have
done best work to develop its sub
urban properties and make them
sites for beautiful homes, extending
the city's limits and bringing i'll
new and crcditablc citizens. Such Is
1.-the character OF the development
which has been done by the Monon-
gahela Industrial Company, a cor
poration owning more than FIVE hum
ired acres in valuable lots lying on
tile East Side-lots which are fast
being covered with beautiful homes
and which afford the space for the
city's best future growth.
Nlonongahela Industrial Company
was organized for just the work it IL
accomplishing-developing its acre
age along Mprgantown avenue ana
about the beautiful fair grounds and
converting them into the most de-
sirablc building sites in any section
of the city. Hundreds of these lots
the company has sold, but hundreds
more they have still on the market,
but rapidly being bought up. The
best versed realty mon tell MS that
the property owned by this company
ranks with the most desirable. THAI
it is sure to show big increase in
value. This makes it valuable US an
investment property or for improve
ment.
Aionongahela Industrial Company
has offices in suite 1G, Trust build-
Ing, and they are prepared to make
some attractive offers to persons in
terested, their lots ranging in price
from 500 to $500. Tho men who
Officer the company are deeply in
.terested In the growth and develop
imenta 81 n lifmeI 1t, and they are Sac;;
|enHip1is lSifg as Tea sork I'M subs
idisidttig their splendid ding.
Tie otficers ares Harry III shfitil,
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1914-10-22
N, G. STEELE.
Real Estate, Coal, Oil and Gas Lands
Successfully Handled.

Nothing has served to more sue
ccssfully direct the eyes of the out
side world upon Fairmont and this
great mineral district than the de-
velopment OF. its coal. oil aud gas
fields, and as natural result, the de-
velopment or these natural resources
has given to this city many Of its
nblest men, men attracted here from
all parts OF the country for opera
tions in different lines. An attrac-
tive field is that of the real estate
business. and those agents who have
shown the proper essentials, have
been successful in the handling of q
large business. Ranking with the
foremost of these is MIR. N. c. Steele,
whose offices are in suite Sc and
S6-A Trust building. Mr.. Steele Is
engaged IN the general realty busi-
ness, but lie is specializing in coal
lands, while he also handles oil and
gas leases, or the land outright, as
may BE desired.
! Mr.. Steele has been engaged in
business here for n number Of years
and he is conducting business of
wide interest. Particularly is this
true of his coal lands business, his
transactions frequently carrying him
TO the larger cities of the country for
conferences with prospective buyers,
and through his agency much of the
valuable land in the north end OF
West Virginia has been placed in
the hands of big companies for de-
velopment. He has at the present
time some very attractive offerings,
Including something like 10000
acres OF coal land in five tracts, with
the Pittsburg and Sewickley seams
OF coal ranging from seven to nine
feet in thickness.
Mr. Steele has an envlable reputa-
-tion in the conduct OF his business.
He is one, OF the best posted men on
roal estategand coal in West Virginia,
rs honest and reliable In all stransac$
tons; and the trad ling public has full
conf idenceS In him. He sis Ia pros ress
.siye cit zen an a BILE real man anu
very popular with wide circles otI
friends.
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1914-10-22
FAIRMoNT svUEcANfziNG' ee Mlta
AND RETR FADING COMPANY
Rlatt u MsredIth' sdessediHB' Wth
n@g5saIl New 3 lsiness: 4 E. VIII

OWNERS IT 4 atiton6 bflesS hbptetiats
the fneceSsitySafii adY Van age Z fS u per.
fectly,., aqIippet will gambling and re;
treading establishment within easy
reach, and the hundreds of car owners
in Fairmont have been accorded espe-
cial favors In this respect. The Fair.
mont Vulcanizing and Retreading
Company. established by Blatt & Mer-
edith aboutione year ago at the corner
of Elkins street and Morgantown ave-
nue. fills every requirement for this
ed by two young men who are highly
experienced in the business, with a
dozen or, more years Of practical work,
and when they established their pres
:ent place they realized that to make
the greatest success they must have
the estsequipment. This Is just what
they have provided, and every car
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1914-10-22

SAAF..iA Y ~ ~ " ~ |"
dWht E VINO has HAD ocsa ion to patron
like them viii subj Gill ID This Title
MEL t aTH lev do tie beA work in
vulcan zihlg suci modern ap.
pfiance st as MI b rf1if Dr. prolipt ser
sYic6s and qeftici ehe His also tplies
t6j'' ret fead III Z. itorts, howey yer,
are Hot c66fhf ed TO tese ciIsaHs OF
%Hrk. 4 THEY dEo5l ey eryttl ling b. auto re-
pairing, and do it8fdglft. riley haye
the agency for the Metz ear. d dandy
for $495 complete:
THE firm built a new brick home for
their business bout thirty by nifty
feet, two stories Hi Height. q IS their
purpose to extend the building 10 doii-
BILE its present size ard next year they
will enter the garage business with
splendid building and all other mecca
sary equipment.
The M embers of this firm are Q G.
5BIatt and IG; FL lMegedith and 10th are
voting ed, Of much enterprise and
sterling qualities. THEY are genuinely
progressive, have shown themselves
capable and reliab1e. They deserve to
succeed, and are suece eding.
=
The Fairmont West Virginian. (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1904-1914, 1914-10-22

BAIRMONT dirt is the
u most valuable dirt in
West Virginia. If you do
not believe this to be true,
Just try to make a purchase
in the heart Of the business
district and see what you
will have to pay. And the
price asked is not a boom
price. Neither is it fictitious.
It does not sell for more than
it will pay dividends on, and
there is not il better investment today
than is offered in Fairmont dirt.
The history Of the growth OF tho
country. towns and cities show fluctu'
ations In real estate very much as We
sec the prices iii grain, cotton, iron or
other products misunderstanding
mainly on supply and demand. There
valucs-thc oscillation in value in real
estate shows that iii the mean, or aver.
age value, gradually increases at much
greater per cent. And there is not Il
corresponding "war nuctuation" OF
from similar cause. One has only to
recall the fact that acreage or square
feet of land have been produced; there
is no more; it was all created when
tho earth was shaped up. finally for
Ilabitation OF man. Acreage may be
nrtifcially produced by swamp drain
age, irrigattng dessert tracts, filling in
old runs" or GulcheS, like some OF
those in Fairnont-but the fact re.
mains, nevertheless, that the Creator
established the limits to acreage some
time since.
One may claim that town and city
lots may be produced" at will. True,
but lots fronting on Main street or
FairmOnt avenue cannot be increased
except by subdivision,
The Biggest Deal in History.
The biggest real estate deal ever
pulled or initlis country was put over
by one Thomas Jefferson--sometimes
spoken of by political orators-and
known as the Louisiana Purchase" 7.
and this record will probably stand,
for Woodrow says we fight no more
for the Requirement OF territory. Just
how far sItIIe GEar;i the Emperor the
Aifkad6 fsihe Gteofse or some OF the
Other Etirope can rill era may outrank
The lSnot here e
attempt ~ guess fsea1M