New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1914-09-13


Of human emotions runs riot humor IS generally
po' lacking.
40 one wonders to sec a prosperous business
man respectfully listening to very young man
{. downy lip and sociaistc tendencies or
knigh, Of Columbus who seems to find point o.
contact with an East Side jew There is no end
20 these incor gruous mental matinSs.
have seen Columbia University proiesso'
yrend four hours in earnest conversation with
lean joweled mplexioned bicycle repairer
from Patchogue. who chewed gum and sagged at
the knees The professor endeavored to explain
tie legitimacy Of Teutonic tendencies. The
Patchogean would not be sidetracked He knew
all that could be accomplished by trained bicycle
corps How the debate ended | do not know, but
surely the professor went home knowing lo'
mere about the psychology of bicycle mender
;lan he ever did before.
\ BLOODLESS SKRIMISH IN WHICH MAT
TIERS OF IMPORT ARE PREDETERMINED.
Here gather cccentrics and enthusiasts of al!
nationalites One wonders what their occupa,
tons may be, that they can so happily neglect
their means of livelihood to haunt this modern
.orum.
Here, for instance, is gestculating youth, de-
broad shouldercd paternal looking German. 81
tell you it's the Kaser's He's blood
thirsty tyrant All his life he has prepared for
f.. and the blood that's shed be on his head. One
cobblcstonc of dear Paris is worth to the
world than your whole brood of Prussian junk
crs."
Nothing will happen to the cobbIestones OF
your dear Paris" the German answered, smil-
ing pIacidIy.
Nothing will happen, indeed! Nothing hap
pencd to Louvain, either, did it?"
well, you have your General Joffre; why didn't
lie prevent it?" The German winked to the by
sanders. 'IIc doesn't like the PrussIan junkers,
either perhaps because nc runs when they come
yes, runs" cried the young man. "Jofre is
.rcat leader"
Sure" assen,s the other solemnly. especially
:; hen ne make, hose mastery retreats" This
rs"d a laugh.
go ahead. laugh you'll laugh in different
fsshion when he mas your conceited General Stat
in a trap"
"Hc can't 40 #. M boy the other reproved.
The Kaiser has no time for that. lie must be i'll
PARIS IN two wecka. You'll sec now nice he'll tx
you! tovr up You wou'. know it. On everI
boulevard there will be IA weiss-hier halle. For
whole week he will feast the city. Every one viii!
have what he wishes sanerkraut, weiss-wur2.,
ncer radishcs Munchener beer, esben und sauer
Kohl. Good, what. \ small change from fros
legs
THE FRENCH NPOLOGIST, IT APPEARS, Is
SWISS.
The crowd doubled up in merriment. Some one
ycIcd, Cheer up, Frenchy!"
81 am no Frenchy," he growled. 81 am from
Switzerland"
You fool" exclaimed the German, disguised
What did you bother me so long for? Better
20 and count the holes in a Swiss cheese"
The descendant of William Tell was COM
pletey played out but another champion took
his place an energetic, young-od man, with
closely cropped iron gray hair and steel blue
eyes lie spoke quietly and authoritatively:
80 you think the Germans will enter Paris in
two weeks, do you;"
"Sure; in fourteen days German will be the
official language of France"
ain fourteen days German will be the official
language in hell" Now the crowd laughed with
the newcomer
We'll, that's where every good Partisan goes
when he dies" retorted the German. And the
tickle crowd laughed with him
NO" the German went on. becoming serious
Nothing stop the Kaiser. He's got new
gum
well as for guns. invented one myself this
month. It's called the Park Row gun, and shoots
hot arr