Evening star., 1914-07-26

VIZ !: :; : :; :: {: !: ::
kQR 8U n of effort and as
VI III sumes limp. sag
AK AN gins posture-the
&HzAGS kind of day
AA when men stand
W in front of drug
store thermometers
and brood over the proposition of why all
drug store thermometers are such IN
=. veteratc liars.
In darkened grillroom the observer
had captured a chair and table and had'
by means of personal research, maoe the
interesting discovery that the aristocrauc
individual in the dinner jacket would
for a reasonable consideration, chase
himself back and forth in search OF
those iced antidotes for heat which lurk
near all grillrooms.
The Observer had just come to the con-
clusion that the world was not COM
pletely hollow mockery-had. indeed, de-
cided that life might be worth living atter
all-when a friend of his-at least the
friend thinks he is friend OF hls-came
haltingly and pantingly into the retreat
He looked as though he had fallen into
a fountain. He said he had been walking
in the sun. Why should 1t be that the
drier the heat, the wetter the man? The
Observer was just about to inquire when
the friend ordered something and handed
the check to the observer.
"warmsh.'' said the friend. 1t
strikes me-
DO you charge this check to me for
coming in here and telling ME that it is
warInish?'' asked the Observer.
Il suffer terribly from the heat, con-
tinued the friend.
You deserve to- replied the Observer
ANY man who lets himself get as dis
gracefully out of condition as you do"
You're no apollo Belvedere yourself"
reminded the friend, slipping his mixture,
cautiously. He is a cautious man by
nature. especially in the matter of pay
ing checks.
What was going to say the friend
proceeded. is that this weather is moth
Ing like some have experienced. Indeed,
1 have come to the conclusion that sum-
mers are not what they were, and that
Washington really has it on any number
Of other cities when it comes to cool
summers But this was in Arkansas. of
course-
was eagerly waiting to be urged to go
on. So the Observer did the urging, and
the friend continued:
1T was in Arkansas about fifteen years
ago, when I was but mere lad All
my life, as you know 1 have been an
ardent fisherman, and when I was mere
had was even more enthusiastic than I
AM now. AS q mere lad
you are OVERRIDING that-mere@ lad
stuf." reminded the Observer. IF II
were you would get to the story
well said the friend. tackling his
story again. when I was a mere lad
There you go again. said the OBJ
server.
The friend became indignant He said:
Am I telling this story. or are you?
If you want to tell this story you tell
1t. and I will keep quiet and
How the deuce can 1 tell the story
when 4 don't know a thing about it ex-
cept that it occurred when You were
mere lad some fifteen years ago.? de-
manded the Observer.
The friend plunged. In his excitement
he ordered the waiter TO bring something
and forgot to give the Observer the check.
When I was mere lad he said. fe-
verishly. II went out one day-one July
day-to an Arkansas creek to fish for
fish,
And not TO fish for houses and ele-
plants and other things that people usu-
ally fish for interjected the Observer.
II began at dawn. and even at dawn 1t
was terrifically hot" the friend rushed
on. land L noticed. as the sun rose that
the water was bubbling in a peculiar
manner. Now this particular pool is
noted for its mosquitoes as well as its
-ish. and hence the top is covered with
coal oil.
Little realizing the marvellous expe-
rience that was soon to overtake me,
continued to waggle my line until sud
den, startling jerk told me that had
bite I yanked up my line. and as l did
the coal-oil covering of the pool burst
into flame"
The sun had set the coal Oil on fre.
said the friend.
When you were a mere lad" medi-
tated the Observer. Go on
well. sir. unterrihed by this extraordl,
nary happening, yanked in my hne' and
when the fish came out of the water the
intense heat generated by the burning
coal oil had done its work. When the
fish came out it was fried"
"It was hot" said the Observer,
"when you were a mere lad.
You bet" said the friend. enthusiast
cally You believe me. don't you?'
'Implicitly," said the Observer. "Espe-
cially the part about your oeins mere
lad fifteen years ago.
Then the story was told to the artist,
and he drew a picture of the friend as ne
looked when fishing on that memorable
day. The drawing of the mere lad is
elsewhere.
In neighboring hotel loboy the OBJ
server came upon man who looks as
though he were still voting for the six
teen-to-one-policy. This man is not fish,
ernan. He was born in the Kansas corn
belt, of honest unright parents. who did
not believe that truth was something you
set up on a stump and threw rocks at
This citizen was tanning himself with the
straw hat he won when Grover Cleveland
was elected in 1892. His scanned, turkey
like neck was bright and red. and his
long frock coat sagged despondentiy.
'Warmish.'' said the Observer.
Immediately the gentleman from the
Kansas corn belt let out a roar.
do you call this warm he ASKED. con-
temptuously. why this amt nothin.
(which MEANS said the Observer