The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1914-06-07

| ~ No. IL TlDflHS We usually 81 W
tho ..rlt to see her mother hug her
inc, S. something a little funny about
ov,. Tween man and wife. and there is
nm ug not exactly perfect about the
nyc .. wecn mother and son. but the
i've tween mother and daughter is
eua Just right.
Wor..n like to attend weddings to
hear '.n big. juicy. sweet promises the
1rlI,s, Ems make.
1dour want my friends to die for me
II they will be polite and will let me
alone ] viii be satisfied.
"Mv ambition" said n man to-day
is to have as little to do as woman"
How hard it is to convict a guilty
man ion the courts. and how easy 1t is
10 convict an innocent man in the news
papers and reform meetings!
The only complimentary thing said
about q certain Atchison man is that
he hi. smart stcpchld
Ar... woman Is cousin to the angels;
Old p,.plr rs she Is To babies.
W. VIII he hated for saying it. but
one man like John u. Rockefeller is
worth 1000 whittlers and whistlers.
When a woman abuses us we stand
L; w. can't fight a woman. but we have
Nv IT getting even; we abuse her
pres ry"S behind her back.
1I,'. is confession ! have long
wanted To- make: think I am better
than tine men who are always trying to
reform me.
I'll" greatest possible joke on a
woman is for a man to shoot her he
causr he Loves Her.
I'll, most conceited thing ever
knew man to say" said woman to-
day my husband said To me when he
proposed he said he could make me
happy"
II You don't like this world. com
plain a. the girl who Is home from
school for the holiday vacation; she Is
running 1t at present.
\ slNtccn-year- old girl walks along the
street as though she owns the world
and Is on her way to get 1t: but as n
rule she Is going after five cents worth
Of tread for her mother.
r." finest household furniture In the
world vIN look poor and tired out when
Piled IA q movers wagon.
"Tm sorry I didn't learn stenography
in tu. first place." said a woman to-day
who lately secured divorce; II thought
Il that hu' o." coaxed me to try mar
r1agc instead"
The first time "A man kisses a woman
other than his wife ne feels as sneak
ing a. % farmer when sending his first
order ,o Montgomery, Ward 4 Co. But
the husband and farmer soon become
hardened. ana patronize not only Mont
gomery Ward, hut Sears Roebuck, and
others
II We We're a woman, we don't believe
We know a man we'd marry.
Aftrr 30 is positively known that a
man Is rich, his neighbors begin saying
that they never did, and never II, bow
down ro the Golden Calf
An AtChlson campaigner says that
when man In the audience asks him a
hard question he replies: Il thank you
for reminding me. ! am coming to that
-prescnt'v' And then the speaker for
gets about it and doesn't answer the
question.
An old man, poor and deserted, is "A
pretty far case of realism.
The eternal feminine question: How
much is il yard?"
In reading war stories we have no.
iced this. There will be a perfect hail
OF bullets. shot and shell turn the Do-
sltlon Iutp perfect he'll. After the
charge the account will state that one
man Wa wounded.
Mos u"ople are always expecting
somo'hlns important to happen. AS a
reporter We have noticed that nine
people oar Of ten when asked for an
Item say Nothing new as yet"
"No vpmarf," said a late novel
Should marry a man who cannot help
her reach the heights" How the
women ,,o that sort of thing!
biz Nprth Atchison dog preached
all las night taking burglars for his
text
When farmer comes into possession
OF Traction engine he delights to fire
Il up ar' go snortlng through the towr
where Ir lives.
: You v.' hear the same old complaints
as l"n- s YOU live.
Sour too hot and iced water Is toe
cold
Am.r"tus have a way Of worrying q
mar l0 ms grave by abusing him IN
JuSl'N and then telling after his deatf
"ha' % ',upd Man he was.
W. . re to be as agreeable as pos
S'ol' . Harry Reisner's summer hal
- az. Ihp lnnlxinO lid