davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Maryville times. (Maryville, Tenn.) 1884-1944, 1914-11-20
HINT EASY TO UNDERSTAND
English Farmer Had Made Old Mis-
take of Counting Chickens Be-
fore They Were Hatched.

An old farmer in the Midlands was
anxious to marry, but could not make
up his mind between the charms of a
certain comely widow in the neigh
borhood and her equally charming
daughter.
At last he resolved to let chance
solve the problem.
'I'll AK tn one | fust sees a-goin'
in," he muttered, and off he started on
his amatory errand. But when he ar
rived both mother and daughter we're
sitting in the doorway.
Dang it," he cried. Here was
comm to ak one O. zee to marry me,
an l swore the fust 'un should ha
the chance. But there We both be
together. I'll shet my eyes now, an
the one as doant want me nun go in
doors. TIL one as stays is my wife
to be-"
Shutting his eyes the old farmer
counted ten solemnly; there was a
subdued chuckle, but when he opened
them both women had gone.-London
Tit-Bits.
The Maryville times. (Maryville, Tenn.) 1884-1944, 1914-11-20
Ratio in CONGRESS,

The ratio of representation in the
lower house of congress at Washing
ton has steadily changed since the
year 1889, when the Constitution began
it's work, the ration was 10000 to the
representative. In 1910 the ratio was
100000 to the representative. If the
ratio did not rise the members of the
lower house would in time become too
numerous for business. 1t is for the
purspose of keeping the membership
within reasonable bounds that the ra-
ton is made to keep pace with popula-
ton.
The Maryville times. (Maryville, Tenn.) 1884-1944, 1914-11-20
GETTING DOWN TO THE FACTS
Relic Which Mr.. Bradley Valued So
Highly Was Not Altogether
Present.

Said Mr.. Bradley: Il think a good
deal Of this rocking chair. It's made
from wood that grew on a farm in
Virginia once owned by w. Wash
ington."
Il don't see anything extraordinary
about it," said Parks, except that it's
big and ugly. How much did it cost
your"
Nothing. That's the beauty of it.
A friend of mine in Washington sent
it to me. There's nothing like hav-
ing good friends.">
NO, l suppose not. How did he
send it?"
by express. Quite a relic, isn't
it? Wood grew on one of G. Wash"
you paid the express charges, I
suppose?"
"Of course. Wood grew on farm
that once belonged to George"
How much was the"
Farm that once belonged to
George Washington in Virginia. . 1t
isn't every day you can"
How much expressage did you"
Isn't every day you can see a
rocking chair made out of wood grown
on farm that once belonged to
George"
What express charges did you have
to pay?"
Eight dollars and seventy-five
cents" said BRADLEY. with visible re.
luctance.
The Maryville times. (Maryville, Tenn.) 1884-1944, 1914-11-20
How Ice Man Got the Booze.

The day was hot and the patient ice
man had taken his usual care in get
the ice in the box just right and
then hopping up the little water that
got on the floor in the operation. He
really was a good ice man and de-
served to be rewarded
Here is bottle of beer; you need
it on a hot day like this" said the
housewife.
Il can't accept anything from pa
irons, lady" the ice man said, as he
eyed the bottle lovingly.
We'll, if that is orders, all right"
the customer said,
Still the ice man pondered. but"
he added, as an afterthought, eff you
put it on the back porch I'll steal it.,
There isn't any rule against stealing
things. indianapolis News.
The Maryville times. (Maryville, Tenn.) 1884-1944, 1914-11-20
To Increase Supply of Salmon.

Important experiments have recent
ly been made by the fisheries expert
for British Columbia in connection
with the hatchery operations. Last
year at Seaton lake, instead of plac-
ing all the sockeye salmon eggs in
trays, as has been the custom hereto
fore, a plan was adopted more in
keeping with the natural methods fol
lowed by the fish. The eggs, after
having been inoculated with the
lymph, were buried under five to sew
en- inches of sand and gravel. Over
100000 ova were thus treated in tanks
especially made therefor, and as re-
suit $4,000 healthy fry have been
taken out with the possibility of more
to follow. This is a splendid record,
as compared with the old pan sys-
tenn, and it is believed by the experts
that the new method will revolution
ize the business of the hatcheries.
The Maryville times. (Maryville, Tenn.) 1884-1944, 1914-11-20
Greek Meets Greek.

The two oldest inhabitants we're
very ignorant, neither of them being
able even to tell the time of day. A
friend of Uncle Bens gave him a
watch, of which he was very proud.
One day, before the crowd at the cor
ner store, old Pete. being slightly
jealous of such wealth and wishing
to embarrass his rival, said; Say,
Ben, what time have you got?"
The other old fellow drew out his
watch and turned it's face toward his
inuuisitor. There she be-" he ex-
claimed.
Pete was almost at loss, but he
made magnificent effort and retort-
ed: Blame if she amt! "-Every-
body's Magazine.
The Maryville times. (Maryville, Tenn.) 1884-1944, 1914-11-20
RESlNOL WILL SURELY
STOP THAT ITCHING

What blessed relief! The moment
resinol ointment touches itching skin,
the itching stops and healing begins.
That is why doctors have prescribed it
successfully for nineteen years in even
the severest, stubbornest cases, of &C.
zema, letter, ringworm, rashes and
other tormenting, unsightly skin-erup-
tons. With the help of warm baths
with resinol soap, resinol ointment re-
stores The ckin or scalp to perfect
health and comfort, quickly, easily and
at little cost. At all uggists.-Adv
The Maryville times. (Maryville, Tenn.) 1884-1944, 1914-11-20
Difference in War Declarations.

There was a great difference in the
manner of commencing a war cen
turtles ago to what there is now, Now
the blow is frequently struck before
the word, and there is no obligation to
issue a formal declaration at all, the
act of war constituting the. declara-
ton. But in medieval times no war
ever began Without formal declara-
tion by a herald. who, in a most lei
surely manner, breathed defiance on
the part of his royal master, ex-
changed innumerable bows with his
enemies, and departed in as dignified
a manner as he came,
The Maryville times. (Maryville, Tenn.) 1884-1944, 1914-11-20
Whom Dodge Hath Joined Together.

Whom Dodge Hath Joined Together.
A contributor sends in this clip
ping from the Kohala Midget, paper
published in the island of Maui one Of
the Hawaiian group. He explains
that "wahine" is Hawaiian for wom-
an, kane" for man, and pau for
enough:
Rev. R. b. Dodge of Waikiki is the
most resourceful man of Maui. Re
Gently a Japanese couple came TO Mr..
Dodge with a request in the sign Ian
guage that he make them man and
wife. They couldn't talk English flu
emily and Mr. Dodge cannot talk Jap
anese so he conducted the ceremony
as follows:
You like wahine?"
Yes"
"Bimeby no kickout?"
No"
You like this kane?" to the woman.
Yes
"Bimeby no kckout?"
NO"
"Pule (pray).
Pau"
The Maryville times. (Maryville, Tenn.) 1884-1944, 1914-11-20
Knows Tetterlne Cures Eczema.

Mocksville, N. c.
have friend in the country here who
has suffered for years with Eczema. and
i told him IL he used Tetterine he would
soon be relieved, for 1t is the only thing
P. s. Early.
Tetterine cures Eczema, letter, Ring
Worm, Itching Piles and every form of
Scalp and Skin Disease. Tetterine soc;
Tetterine Soap Csc. At druggists, or by
mail from the manufacturer, The Shup-
trine Co, Savannah, Ga.
With every mail order for Tetterine we
give a box of Shuptrine's 10c Liver Pills
free. ADV.
The Maryville times. (Maryville, Tenn.) 1884-1944, 1914-11-20
PePuna Did

cine on earth. Let me tell you why
think so.
"My son has been afflicted with ca
tarrh since he was baby five months
old, so that for years l had to watch
him all night long, and keep his
mouth open SO he could breathe. as
he could not breathe through his nose.
"He has always been very delicate.
"Since he commenced taking tina
Peruna / can go to bed and sleep ala
night"
The Maryville times. (Maryville, Tenn.) 1884-1944, 1914-11-20
2 woman.
Getting Even.

Friend (to returned traveler)-I
suppose you had some thrilling expert
ences over in Europe
Traveler-Yes; | was arrested as a
spy, and who do you suppose was my
captor-a waiter l once refused to
tip over here. He recognized me and
| barely escaped with my life.
The Maryville times. (Maryville, Tenn.) 1884-1944, 1914-11-20
Exact Copy Of Wrapper
Poor Material in His Promises.

when we were married." sobbed
the young wife, "he said he loved me
with a love more enduring than the
everlasting granted"
And it didn't last?" queried the
sympathizing friend.
Last" echoed the young wife, dry
ing her tears; at didn't last as long
as a wood pavement"
The Maryville times. (Maryville, Tenn.) 1884-1944, 1914-11-20
Rainy DAYS.

Are you saving up something for
a rainy day."
No" replied Farmer Corntossel.
What we're troubled with out this
way is an annual drought. If we had
more rainy days, everybody would
have money. Washington Star.
The Maryville times. (Maryville, Tenn.) 1884-1944, 1914-11-20
Hard on Some People.

Americans must learn to use home
grown tobacco" trade journal de-
clares. This will go hard with those
persons who haven't been in the habit
of using any kind of tobacco at ALL
Youngstown (O) Telegram.
The Maryville times. (Maryville, Tenn.) 1884-1944, 1914-11-20
Money for Christmas.

Selling guaranteed wear-proof hosi-
cry to friends & neighbors. Big Xmas
business. Wear-Proof Mills, 5000
Chestnut st., Philadelphia, Pa.-AdY.
The Maryville times. (Maryville, Tenn.) 1884-1944, 1914-11-20
plate Tried to Save Christ.

II. Jesus and Barabbas, w. POPS.
Matthew adds to that awful cry, when
PLATE has washed his hands in token
of innocency, His blood be upon US"
Matt. 27:25). The other writer's
give US some suggestions as to who
Barabbas was, and makes this choice
more appalling by way of contrast.
III. The Teaching. This lesson is
intended to center itself about Plate.
In it we see the struggle between con-
science and personal ambition. Pr
late was impressed by the words of
Christ. He told the priests and the
multitude that he found no fault in
him. 1t appears that up to a certain
point he tried to save Christ, and GER
tainly to the end he strove to avoid
the responsibility for his death, Sore
ly pressed he temporized and the
conversation recorded in John IS: 1888
shows how profoundly interested he
was in this prisoner before him.
PLATE knew whom he was dealing
with as politician, but did not know
this man of Galilee." He chose rath-
er to be Caesars friend than to per-
form righteous act according to the
dictates of his conscience Pressed
by the clamor of those whom he de-
spised, he sacrificed his conscience
rather than incur their anger.
The golden text focuses the personal
application of this entire lesson,
What shall do unto Jesus, which is
called Christi" AS this question fell
from the lips of Plate it was an
appeal to those who had asked for
Barabbas. What then shall do?' was
an acknowledgment of defeat, an
acquiescence to the will of the people,
and a desire to shift the responsible
ity for the shedding of innocent blood.
This is the question of all questions
which men have to face. Men are still
following the course of PLATE, either
they consent to his crucifxion or to
his browning.
The Maryville times. (Maryville, Tenn.) 1884-1944, 1914-11-20
They BEGAN Early.

Dentist-When did YOUR teeth first
begin troubling you?
Patient-When I was cutting them.
The Maryville times. (Maryville, Tenn.) 1884-1944, 1914-11-20
Had None.

THAT girl likes to look on the
bright side of things"
THAT must be the reason she Tilted
Bonehead " g
The Maryville times. (Maryville, Tenn.) 1884-1944, 1914-11-20
w. L. DOUGLAS

For 81 years W. L. Douglas has guaranteed the
value by having his name and the retail price
stamped the sole before the shoes leave the fac
tory. This protects the wearer against high prices
for inferior shoes Of other makes. W. L. Douglas
shoes are always worth what you pay for them. II
you could see how carefully w L. Douglas shoes are
made and the high grade feathers used You would then
understand why they look better, At better hold their
shape and longer than other makes for the price.
II the w. l.. Douglas shoes not for sale in your
vicinity order direct from factory Shoes sent every
where. Postage free in the Z. s. Write for Ilus-
Grated CutmlOR showing how to order by mail
W. l. DOUGLAS, 40 Spark st., Brockton, MaSG
The Maryville times. (Maryville, Tenn.) 1884-1944, 1914-11-20

Most of US need the money because
that is what money is for.
The Maryville times. (Maryville, Tenn.) 1884-1944, 1914-11-20

Earthly angels are all right, but
there isn't much excitement in being
married to one.
The Maryville times. (Maryville, Tenn.) 1884-1944, 1914-11-20

The average woman may not be
much at mathematics, but she does q
lot of figuring in trying to perfect her
figure.
The Maryville times. (Maryville, Tenn.) 1884-1944, 1914-11-20

YOUR OWN DRUGGIST WILL TELL You
Try Murine Rye Remedy for Red, Weak, Watery
Just Rye Comfort. Write for Book of the Rye
By nail Free. Murine Rye Remedy Co.. Chicago.
The Maryville times. (Maryville, Tenn.) 1884-1944, 1914-11-20

Arm yourself with a dark lantern
when looking for honor among thieves.
The Maryville times. (Maryville, Tenn.) 1884-1944, 1914-11-20
REMARKABLE LETTER FROM A WELL !

REMARKABLE LETTER FROM WELL
KNOWN WASHINGTON DRUGGIST.
in reference to Elixir Babek the great remedy
for chiHs and feUcr and all n1aLdridf diseases.
"Within the last five months have sold $500
bottlesof Eli xtr Ha bek for Malaria, Chills and
Fever. Our customers speak very well of 1t,
Henry Evans, 922 F ST., NV Washington, c."
Elixir Ba bek so cents all druggists, or by
Parcels Post, prepaid, from Kloczewski d Co.,
Washington, d. G.
The Maryville times. (Maryville, Tenn.) 1884-1944, 1914-11-20

One company alone has installed
more than 400 automatic railroad stok-
ers on locomotives in this country
The Maryville times. (Maryville, Tenn.) 1884-1944, 1914-11-20
INTERNATIONAL
SUNDGYSGOOL
LESSON

CBy E. O. SELLERS, Acting Director Sun
day School Course. Moody Bible Insti-
tute, Chicago)
The Maryville times. (Maryville, Tenn.) 1884-1944, 1914-11-20
Wonders
For My
Boy

Mrs. Nellie
c ourter, 50
Franklin Ave,
Norwalk, Conn.,
writes: "Peru-
ma has don Q
won ders for
my boy. ! cam
not praise 1t
enough.
Il think Il Is
the best medi-
The Maryville times. (Maryville, Tenn.) 1884-1944, 1914-11-20

LESSON TExT-Luke 23:18-25. See also
Matt. 27:l1-31.
GOLDEN TEXT PLATE saith Laro
them, What then shall I do unto Jesus,
who is called Christ?-Matt. 27:22 r. v
The Richmond Virginian. (Richmond, Va.) 1910-1920, 1914-08-14
JNO. 4. HENNESSY
OUT FOR GOVERNOR


New York, Aug. 13-John A. Hem
messy announced today that he would
be a candidate in the Democratic
State primaries for the nomination for
governor. lie said he W0uld make a
complete statement in a few days Of
his reasons for entering the prlma ries-
He declined TO discuss any plans to-
night but said a complete ticket would
be nut in the primaries against tha
Tammany State orga nizatIon. Tie od-
mitted that his decision 70 he candt-
date was determined after conferences
with Democrats in many sections ~
the state,
At the hour Mr. Heunessv anuoanc-
ed his candidacy ia New York. Frank
lin Roosevelt In Washington. an
nouuced from his Office In the VA w de-
partment that he would be candidate
for United States senator in the pri-
marles.
Mr. Roosevelt was careful 10 say
that he was doing this without the
knowledge Of President wilson ct
there is no doubt that This team. flen-
messy and Roosevelt, will have "a least
the acquiescent support of the adj
ministration in an attempt 10 break
the present Tammany leadership
throughout the Stale and pu' new
face on the party which shall he ac-
cepta BILE TO the Wilson Democrats, Mo-
only will there be a fun State ticket
headed by Mr.. Hennessy, put Spe03a!
effort win be made to elect an antl~
Murphy state committee ana county
committeeman in every county
The fight according 10 Mr Hen
messy, will be against the Tamln3Hy
State organize tion.
The Richmond Virginian. (Richmond, Va.) 1910-1920, 1914-08-14
PRELIMINARY FIGHTING
Continued from First Pase)


Belgian defenders
s believed in Brussels already this fortress
Frnchw aro
the
the a
fronier a bayone charge
The Frenou
prison n
and into the Of Belgium
the
been
gFrenehf n
b
Hanhrg that the Russians
the Cult of Finland although
German
left
s
OF
by
sending France The
eonsus have taken the Austrian consnates
Muon Tuesday the
rturdnin wounded and machine
annhlae Baden
n
/
Galc infiing
werec he
Americ The AIRY
"A beer
Fish
The Richmond Virginian. (Richmond, Va.) 1910-1920, 1914-08-14
POLICE LOOK FOR
CHECK FLASHER

Petersburg. Va. Aug. IA
stranger passing as H. E. Wilcox. who
is described as being Ave feet, six In
ches in height. Weighing about las
pounds. clean-shaven, light sandy
hair, neatly dressed and wearing a
sailor straw hat, was IN the city very
recently and succeeded in having two
checks cashed. each for $25. purport-
ing to have been drawn by whole
sale grocery firm on the National Bank
OF Petersburg.
The man is said to have been ac-
companied by woman, slightly taller
than himself and a blonde. He has
made his escape and the Petersburg
police are making a diligent search for
him.
The Richmond Virginian. (Richmond, Va.) 1910-1920, 1914-08-14

mond chamber OF commerce is doing
effective work in attracting to Rich
mond as market people from the
West Virginia territory, who have here
tofore been depending largely on the
Baltimore and Cincinnati markets.
The business men of Richmond. mem
hers of the bureau, are doing all they
know how to do. to make the visitors
feel real interest in Richmond and
to realize tho fact that Richmond s
location, transportation facilities and
competitive land and water freight
rates. make this city the logical mar
ket place for them. The visitors are
pleased with thes entertainment which
has been given so far, and which will
be given them during the remainder
of the week
No shop Tall
noticeab Bile feature of the week,
so far, has been the apparent lack
OF effort on the part OF Richmond
houses to talk business, They are
giving their guests a good time. and.
incidentally. are permitting them to see
Just what they have to offer. t. 3
visitors are becoming interested. of
their own viii, In what the Richmond
manufacturers and jobbers have.
The entertainment features for the
rest OF the week are a ball game to-
day between Richmond and Roanoke
and theater party at the Lyric tomor-
row night.
The Richmond Virginian. (Richmond, Va.) 1910-1920, 1914-08-14
CITIZEN
OF WORLD, IS DEAD

Petersburg Va. Aug. IA tele-
gram was received here this morning
announcing the death. which occurred
peper, of the Rev. Charles w Collier. a
former resident of this city.
Mr.. Collier was in the fiftNfifth year
of his age. and when a youth he learn
ed the printers trade. When he grew
into manhood he lett Petersburg. and
for several years followed the life OF
a sailor on the Great Lakes Return
ing to Petersburg he married his boy
hood sweetheart Miss Ella Brown. of
the West End. and resumed work az
his trade. being for several years en-
ployed as compositor in the office of
the Index-Appeal and later purchased
an interest In the Daily Progress.
A few months afterwards. MIR. Col
lier decided to enter the Baptist min
tstry and left here for Crozier Theo-
logical seminary. where he took Il
course and his first charge was at
Wilmington. Del Afterwards serv-
ing nobly on several charges in Gull
pepper county. and later accepting the
pastorate of the Baptist church at Bed :
ford City. which he held until his
health failed about eighteen months
ago.
Mr.. Collier had been successful In the
ministry. and Wa. loved by the people
whom he served. Besides his wife. the
deceased is survived by two brothers,
Messrs James A. Collier and Edward
q. Collier, of this city.
The Richmond Virginian. (Richmond, Va.) 1910-1920, 1914-08-14
PETERSBURG
BIG EXCURSION TO
co TO THE SEASH0RE

Petersburg Va, Aug. l3.-Much in
terest Is said to be manifested be-
tween the congregations of the Chester
and Matoaca Methodist churches, for
whom Isham r. Dyer. OF this city, Will
conduct joint excursion 10 Ocean
View on August goth.
The members of the two congrega-
lions are vteing with one another to
determine which of the two can carry
the larger number of persons, Many
Petersburgers will take advantage of
the excursion and it is expected to be
a great success.
The Richmond Virginian. (Richmond, Va.) 1910-1920, 1914-08-14
RIGHTS OF PASSENGERS
ARE BEING DISCUSSED
WHAT BECOMES OF NEUTRAL
NOYAGERS IF LINER Is
TAKEN AS PRIZE?

Washington, Aug. 12.--Concern for
the fate Of the passengers OF the Lu-
sitanla and other liners making a dash
across the Atlantic at this time. when
they are liable to capture. has flooded
the state department and authorities
on international law with inquiries
as to what belligerent vessel would
do with the passengers on one OF
these liners II she was taken as a
war prize.
The proposition is stated something
Ike this: Suppose "a British steamer
with a large number OF passengers
aboard was captured by a German
vessel that the German vessel was
pursued and. as a military necessity.
10 avoid the British steamer falling
again into the hands Of the British,
IL beca me necessary or advisable TO
sink the ship. what would happen TO
tho passengers?
It Is conceded that the passengers
would be taken off the captured vessel
before IL would be sunk. but with the
German ship pursued and unable TO
make home port. tho question arises
would she be Justified in sailing the
high seas for any length OF time with
these passengers aboard, regarding
whose fate many relatives and friends
would be anxious?
Would BE Forced to Leave.
II the capturing vessel made for a
neutral port 20 land the passengers
she would he forced to leave again
within twenty four hours and could
take aboard only sufficient coal TO take
her Ia fne next port she wished to
maxi Then as soon as she left the
ueufgal port and got out three miies
she would he liable 10 attack from the
pursuing enemy,
Attorneys who have for years made
a close study of International law and
are considered experts on the subject
say there is nothing In the code to
govern procedure on this point State
depart naeut officials refuse to discuss
the subject.
Students Of International law say
that the capturing vessel would
not want To sail for any length oil
time carrying a considerable number
Of PASSENGERS, for they would have 10
be fed and would cucumber the crew
for action. They say there Is nc
question but that II the vessel was
unable TO make a home port where
passengers Of a hostile nation would
he held as prisoners OF war, and II
n neutral nation be treated rs aliens
she would proceed to an American on
other neutral port, and dssennark ths
passen gers.
Would &c War Vessel.
Regarding the probability Of attack
when leaving the neutral port they
say that the weasel would Of neces'
sdty he q war vessel to have made
the capture in the first place, and
being & war vessel would court rath-
e~ than avoid the attack on leaving
the neutral port, They contend thai
the capturing vessel would be In little
less worse predicament when leaving
the neutral port than she was when
through military expediency 1t was
thoGght necessary to sink the wal
prize on account of being hard pressed
by the enemy.
They agree that 1t would be the
first duty. as well as advantage. o.
the capturing ship to land the pas
sengers from the captured vessel al
soon as possible in "a neutral port i
they were not to be held as prison
ers of war because citizens OF hos
tile nation.
The Richmond Virginian. (Richmond, Va.) 1910-1920, 1914-08-14
Funeral of Mrs. Goodwin.

Petersburg, Va, Aug. l3.--The
funeral OF Mrs. Elizabeth /. Goodwin
was conducted at the grave in Bland
ford cemetery at $50 o'clock this
afternoon Rev. s. T. Brown, of the
High Street Methodist Episcopal
church. ofiiciated and the following
gentlemen served as pallbearers:
Messrs George Dyer. James Dyer. i.
w Smith. Benjamin Campbell, Il. i'
Savory and Hiram Hawkins.
The funeral was largely attended
and many floral designs attested the
esteem in which the deceased was -leld