The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1914-04-28

CUPID and The GOUT
BY MARGUERITE HELOISE DE
TIENNE.

| 5Sul. I-OuCu! Nc CTl0u, as nle
equity foot gave evidence that 1t was
still equity. "As l was saying, If you
cure this govt of mine Martha Is
yours"
"She is worth the try" laughed Dr.
Cornelius Balm, who WAS a young ply
sician
TRY nothing, Neale, you've Just got
to do it. And one other thing is that
! won't touch drop Of medicine. I've
swallowed enough dope to float q
done for me is to make me feel like
the symptoms on the outside of dol
lar bottle. You can try any new-fan-
gled stunt from radium down to mud
baths, but not one drop of medicine .
rs there any time limit, Mr.. Met.
calf?"
mo, but the quicker you do 1t the
quicker you can have Martha"
And we can't be married until you
are cdred?"
That's the way it stands"
And you will follow whatever rules
lay down so long as don't prescribe
any medicine?"
'Tll follow them to the letter, Neale,
to the letter"
Very WELL" said the young doctor
with SMILE" we will begin treatment
tomorrow"
THE sooner the better for me-"
All right, sir; it is a bargain. I
must be going now, as | have a call
to make. Will see you later. Good
bye"
Goodbye, Neale"
Martha accompanied Neale to his
bright new auto which was standing
In front of the Metcalf home.
Surely, it won't be hard for you
to cure father, Neale. They are do
Ing such remarkable things in medi-
cine now. OF course, the other doc
tors failed because they were a bit
old-fashioned, but you are so up-to-
date In every way l am sure you can't
fail"
Balm grew three inches taller under
the influence of Martha's words, yet
they were not quite sufficient to drive
out that element of doubt so charac-
teristic of the medical mind.
This medicine game is a sort of
hft-and-miss proposition after all We
make some surprising advancements,
and do some good, but none knows
better than ourselves how ignorant we
arr. But I'm going to cure your far
| Their If you will help me-"
What do you want me to be, Neale
the nurse?
mo; he doesn't need a nurse. /
want you to be the big boss and see to
1t that he follows my directions to the
letter"
Il certainly will, dear"
Then the only question that re-
mains is how soon do you want to
marry3"
Three months at least want to
have nice wedding and at least
three months to know bow it feels to
be engaged, Neale." et
All right, grille. I'll have father
cured In three months Au Revoir, "
he laughed, as the machine started
of. !.
"Quch!" yelled Mr.. Metcalf the next
morning as he lifted his sick foot out
/ of bed.
Martha was waiting for just that
password and when she heard it she
tapped gently on the door
Come H." said Mr. Metcaif.
1T is Martha, father. DR.. Balm has
fnafrry0fnd 10 fhot 81
your exercise"
my whatf"
Your exercise" she murmured
sweetly, as she drew a huge box from
under the bed. Here's your SEIZED
ule," handing him sheet Of paper to
read as she unpacked the box.
The paper read as follows:
One-pound dumb-beIl 80 times
Two-pound dumb-hell, 10 times.
Three-pound dumb-beils, Is times
| Indian clubs, 10 minutes.
Elastic chest expander. minutes
Leg movement. minutes.
| Rolling on the floor, 5 minutes.
Hopping on one foot. minutes.
| Cold bath
These exercises must be gone
through three times a day before
meals.
What does it mean?" asked her
father with a gulp.
1T means, father, that you are 60
ing to be cured of the govt, and that
am here to see that you follow out
this program"
Il won't do it."
"Oh yes you will father; because l
am going to stay here and see that
you do. You told Neale that you
would stand for any stunt from radi-
UNI down to mud baths, and you new
er go back on your word. Start in
with these one Founders like a nice
father" she cooed, as she put the
dumb-bells into his hands
And what do you want me to do
with them, MarthaT'
Martha explained everything, and
1t was all she could do to keep from
bursting with laughter as her father.
gowned in pink pajamas, exercised
and pulled through the entire seized
ule. When he finished the five-min-
ute hop Martha told him to take his
cold bath and then come in to break
fast.
When Mr.. Metcalf entered the din.
ing room he looked at the almost bar
rem table, and then turned to Martha:
Please tell James to serve break.
fast right away, Martha l am as hun.
CRY as a cannibal."
There's your breakfast, father"
''Where?"
Right there. father; milk and
crackers"
Have you gone crazy, Martha?"
Hang the doctorl l want some
thing to eat"
Sorry, father, but diet is one of the
most essential things in the cure of
govt and you must diet. Neale will
not get me until you are cured"
And you two are In a conspiracy
to cure me this way?"
Sure, l want Neale and that's why
l am helping"
Then take Neale and let me have
something to eat"
/ Contract says you must be cured.
/ father"
Hang! Ouch!" yelled Mr.. Metcalfe,
as his foot unintentionally went to the
floor.
Don't kick. father. Eat your
/ breakfast You may have chicken
broth for lunch and vegetable soup
for dinner"
The thought of some change molli-
fed her father, and he began to MUNICH
his crackers resignedly.
1t was five days before Mr.. Metcalf
saw anything of Neale, and all that
time Martha saw to 1t that her father
! followed out directions PERFECTLY The