The Washington herald., 1914-04-02
Statesmen, Real and Near.
Ry FREp c. KELLY.

By FRED c. KELLY.
When the conversation In the Senate
cloakroom had veered, around to the
matter Of horrible experiences. Senator
Charles E. Townsend. Of Michigan, re-
called the time that he served as the
awful example at a medical eclinic.
| When he was attending the UnIver-
| sity of Michigan.a Townsend had little or
| no money, and nd to work at odd Jobs
while his more fortunate classmates
were gathered together singing stein
| songs. One day when he was particu-
larly lacking In ready money, he ran a
long piece OF wire into the side of his
| foot, and he soon became SO lame that
he was unable to perform even the
mlldest chore. His foot swelied to the
size of a smithfieid ham.
To employ the services of a high priced
doctor was out OF the question. so Town.
send went to the medical school and in
| quired II he couldn't make himself useful
as victim for their clinic.
The medical professor he consulted
seemed greatly pleased over the inter-
and told Townsend that he would be
! most welcome as an object OF study.
Townsend presented himself at the ap-
pointed hour to be operated on within
full view OF the audience.
do you wish to take an anaesthetic?"
inquired the professor. who was to per-
form the operation.
| Townsend knew Il would hurt, and
| wavered for a moment but his curiosity
prevailed. He wished to be awake to
know what all they did to him. The idea
Of class OF comparative strangers
knowing things about his foot that he
would not know himself seemed unfair
He said, therefore, that IL II was all
the same he would just stay awake and
| witness the operation.
THE pain will be something excruciat-
ing" the professor told him, cheerfully.
4 II know" admitted Townsend. but I
want to see it ALL
The professor put on his operating
clothes and began the entertainment.
| TT is evident" he said to the class, in
/ a pleasing optimistic tone. that either a
| piece of wire or a portion Of the sock
has become imbedded deep back into the
foot and already there are grave indi-
| cations Of blood poisoning. II We can
arrest the blood poisoning We may be
able to avoid amputating the entire foot,
and in that way perhaps save the pa
| TENTS life. There is very serious
| condition here. and II is going to be
extremely painful to our young subject.
whether we save his foot or not
Now ii may have been unparIiamen-
| tary for the victim Of the performance
| to take part in the discussion. but at
that point young Townsend injected a
remark OF his own. He suggested with
great seriousness:
oh. sir, please let's talk about some
thing else
Senator Townsend. by the way, was
| a champion wrestler and boxer in his
| college days. From the time he left col
lege until the present time he has had
Just one occasion to make practical use
| was recorder OF deeds for his county
in Michigan a few years ago. man
and his wife came in one day to transfer
| piece Of land. When the money had
| been paid over. the wife. a timid-looking
little woman. inquired IL she were not to
| have part of it for hers.
Nav" replied the man. ais he tucked
the roll Of bills into his pocket
The woman demurred timidly. and the
| man. a husky weighing about 20 pounds
turned and slapped her.
wait just one minute" said Town
send. at that point in the proceedings,
and I'll show you something"
He rushed around from behind his
counter and knocked the man down by
means OF q. sharp. quick wallop in the
jaw.
The man arose. said that perhaps he
had been little hasty. and went his
way.
Victor Berger. the Milwaukee Socialist
formerly a member OF Congress. is SO
free-handed that he has never been able
TO save much money. but he has n
orother' George. living up in Connecti-
cut who is more thrifty and has amassed
comfortable little fortune.
One day. some time ago. a friend Of the
Connecticut Berger met him on the street
and said:
y saw picture of your brother. Vic
tor in the Saturday Evening Post. Did
you see IT,
What's that-the New York Post:"
asked Berger.
No. the Saturday Evening Post, pub
lished at Philadelphia. you know. You
ought to buy a copy and see Victor's
picture. 1t only costs a nickel"
'1'll go and buy it," replied Berger.
Costs 4 nickel, eh?"
He started on, then paused and came
back
Say" he asked. don't you suppose
that papers in the reading room at the
public library? Well, guess I'll go and
look at II there"
1t is the proud boast of Representative
Walker. OF Georgia. who is one of the
most faultlessly dressed men in Congress
and who looks thorouGnly to-the-menu-
born, that he went barefooted until he