Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1914-09-23
HISTORY AND PUNS
FOR PASSENGERS ON
SIGHTSEEING AUTO
Lecturer Gives Interesting
Account of City's Past
Without Its Accuracy Be-
ing Challenged.

Did you ever view Philadelphia from a
sightseeing auto? II you didn't you have
lots to learn. You will find in some in
stances that famous historians have
| greatly erred, that statisticians have not
been within gunshot distance OF facts
| and that you'll feel at the end OF the
trip that you should brush up on things
| concerning your own city
! A trip on one of these "rubber-neck"
cars was taken today by an Evening
| Ledger reporter. He started from Fif-
| teenth and Market streets in receptive
mood, but before riding a mile was con-
| vnced that he knew very little, indeed,
! about places and events in his own city.
| The first surprise came when the car
| reached the main postoffice There the
marathon lecturer pointed to the statue
| of benjamin Franklin and announced in
authoritative tones. There Is the statue
of Benjamin Franklin. II was upon this
| very plot of ground that Franklin flew
| his kite and got electricity from the
clouds" Some of the other riders also
| were amazed. They made quiet COM
| ment. but as most of the passengers APP
! pcared to be contented the statement
passed urduestoned.
one could half close his eyes and pic
| ture the guide cnlighteninE an audience
! in Il vaudeville house. Glowing tribute
was paid by the lecturer to prominent
! business establishments on Chestnut
! street. on reaching Fifth street, he an
| nounCed that the Delaware River was
! five squares east; also that the Atlantic
! Ocean, which washed the shores of New
Jersey and several other States, was 63X
| miles east of that.
! CONSCIENCELESs ENCYCLOPEDIA.
| Endowed with a vocabulary which
would have done credit to a high school
| graduate, the speaker then went on like
a human encyclopedia without a con-
science.
The block from Fifth to sixth on
| Market street was referred to as great
| mems row." Luckily there were no MEM
/ bers of the Pennsylvania Historical So
! Ciety on board for the guide pointed out
| the early homes of several Presidents
I half dozen famous statesmen and resi-
| denCcs Of others who helped make history
| in the days Of the citys early struggles.
At Seventh street he was obliged to
! drop history for commerce. All the de-
partmcnt stores got the fullest praise
| and the prices of hats and gowns were
! not forgotten. In describing one, the
/ lecturer remarked: There Is a store so
! large that If woman bought hat at
! the Market street entrance and carried
| II over every floor the hat would be out
! of style before she left the building"
which a white coated cook was turning
acrobatic cakes That" shouted the
guide, lis a restaurant where hungry
man may get anything from n roast dim
ner to a piece of bread if he has roll"
This brought smile and, encouraged,
he went on. There Is the worlds
largest Penn holder, City Hall. and il
cost 10000 to hold Billy in place. Even
at that he becomes impatient on account
Of the deeds which 20 on under him"
Up Broad street the car then wabbled.
When the suburbanites on board were
surrounded by n batch Of beautiful build
in=s the mega phoned speaker let his ora
tory on at full speed. No stcnographer
could have followed him. A flood of su-
perativcs was applied to the surround
ing architecture. The faCetous talker
could not resist tho statement that Venus
de Milo on the Academy Of Fine Arts
lost her head on account of praise"
"BROTHERLY LOVE" EXPLAINED.
According to the guide, this is called
the City Of Brothcrly Love because the
Girls Commercial School is opposite tho
BOYS High School, at Broad and Green
streets.
None Of Phladelphia's flnancIers and
the amount Of their fortunes was forgot
ten on the remainder of the trip up Broad
street When asked about a particular
ornament which protruded from the sec
ond story of nearly every house on an
other street, the guide looked wise.
They are busy-bodies," he said, land
on account OF present financial conditions
they are placed there so that the resi-
dents may learn If there's a bill collector
at the door"
Later the passengers learned that n
large plot of ground containing tomb
stones was a cemetery, and more enlight-
cning information along this line was
Ir+ Do
reached. lie showed the Fairgrounds for
children 10 the right, and the Fairgrounds
for policemen and nurses" to the left.
Pointing 10 the statue Of an Indian which
faces both places, he said: Even the
visiIant medicine man cannot devise a
cure tor this condition"
BY way OF educational instruction. the
guide announced mo fruit trees can be
planted in the park, Yet the guards often
find peaches in pairs on the benches" As
the car was then very near the SChuyl-
KIN River, the speaker again became SER
ious.
YOU can readily see," he exclaimed,
THAT th.s is river. Every Saturday
afternoon there's a boat race here be- |
tween the crews Of the Tuivorsay Of
Pennsylvania and Girard College.
Whats that flag on the west bank"
asked a passenger,
"That Is the flag above Fort Belmont, |
whore Washington and his army rested /
after leaving Valley Forge"
WHERE PENN NET ENGINEERS.
A wave Of patriotism swept over the |
tourists, and il was increased when the |
auto passed tho statue Of General Grant. |
The volublc historian called attention to |
the fact that the General was facing the |
home Of William Penn on the west bank, |
and said Grant was ready to protect Il /
just as Well as he protected the North In |
siNty-OUe.
As Spring Garden street was reached |
the guide pointed out a large mount 10 /
the right. That's where William Penn |
met his engineers" he said, "and told !
them how TO lay out the plans Of Fair |
mount Park" This was followed by a |
deluge of statistics, which was cut short |
only by the appearance OF the Washing |
ton monument.
At 23d and Spring Garden streets the |
riders saw a small-polnted three story |
building. That exclaimed the guide. |
lis the original fatiron building, the first |
in this country. New York copied its |