The Kansas City sun. (Kansas City, Mo.) 1908-1924, 1914-08-29

1899 VI AA9tAAAAS thAAOA0
OF my nerves and spirits. 1
would come home elated one day, but
horribly depressed the next. There
periods OF encouragement when
1 almost gave up hope of making my
living with my pen. At one Of these
times l spoke my thought to my best
man friend. viii Mason was older
than l, and successful in his pro-
fession. He knew much of the pub
fishing business and was in touch with
many editors. l have often thought
that had he not steered me through
had the courage to continue. Late one
afternoon l called at a magazine office
to offer to the editor an article l had
in mind. l had never met this editor
before, and he was not a gentleman.
AS l unfolded my plan he threw him
self back in his chair with a contempt
uous laugh.
None of that in ours!" he declared
roughly. 1--WE don't want that stale
kind of stuff in our publication"
I felt my cheeks burn as l took the
elevator to the street. 1t was dusk
as l left the building, and l actually
staggered with a dumb nausea and
revolt against the life l was leading. l
felt as if l had been begging, instead
Of offering to do honorable work. 1
did not take a car, but walked slowly
uptown. Il can't stand this kind of
thing any longer!" l muttered over
and over.
1 repeated the declaration to Will
Mason when he called on me that eve
ming. Il would rather take in wash
ing than hawk manuscripts around!'
/ said.
He shook his head, although there
was a CLEAN of sympathy in his eyes
Don't talk like that" he protested.
You couldn't wash a pocket handker-
chief properly! You're up against it
all right, but you'll have to play the
game out, child. I'll help all l can
by standing on the side lines and
cheering"
He did. 1t was he who told me that
l needed self-confidence, that l should
seem brave even If l wasn't. After
that I tried to be brave, and l was, 1
suppose, for things began to grow
brighter.
An editor offered me a hundred dol
lars for a short story l had written.
A hundred dollars! And l did need
the money SO badly! l was so much
excited over this piece of good fortune
that l called VIII Mason up at his Of
fee and told him Of it. He seemed as
much pleased as l was and suggested
that l meet him that evening and
dine with him in celebration of the
event. Perhaps 1t was unconvention-
al. for VIII is a married man, but l
did not stop to think of that, and I
accepted. VIII was kind to me, and
had a great bunch of violets at my
place at dinner. We had a little table
away off in a secluded corner of the
hotel and had a merry time.
A week later a woman whom l knew
came to see me and told me that Mrs.
had heard that l had dined with
her husband and was angry. That
evening VIII came to call and / told
him frankly what l had heard.
please explain the matter to your
wife," l urged.
He shrugged his shoulders and
laughed. why should 1? She re-
sents the fact that l took you out to
dinner. I saw a friend of hers in the
restaurant that evening. Had l seen
her earlier, we would have gone some
where else"
"But-why?" l asked. There was
no harm in my dining with you, an old
friend"
"Of course not. But people don't
want to believe the best, but the
worst. And If there had been any
harm in 1t, whose business would it
have been anyway"
Your wife's and mine!" / flashed
out holly.
He rose to his feet with a forced
laugh. Your ideas are as narrow as
Mrs. Mason's." he said CURLY. Il sup
posed you were a more sensible WON,
an. Good night"
1 was alone once more. was tired,
and my head ached. My little parlor
was deadly dull. Was this all there
to be in my life? A pleasant
friendship was spoiled. And yet what
could l have done to keep 1t and my
.self-respect at the same time? But 1
was horribly lonely. Not only did I
have nobody to love me, but, worse
still, l had nobody to love. l had CIV
en- my husband my all, and now my
heart was turned back upon itself.
But l had my work, | remembered,
and after this 1 wrought at it with
feverish intensity. / took my next ar
ticle to an editor whom l had met
several times, and he ordered some
other work from me. He wanted to
talk it over with me, he said. Would
l go out and lunch with him, and we
could discuss it while we were eating
and drinking?
I flushed uncomfortably, for l knew
he had a wife. He laughed merrily as
l tried, stammeringly, to wonder If it
was all right"
TITS only business, you know" he
said. 81 often ask some woman writ
err to lunch with me while we talk
magazine work. My wife likes me to
do SO, for then / eat a decent meal In
stead of boiling a sandwich and coffee
at a quickindigestion lunch tcounter."