The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1914-10-22
KITCHEN WRANCLES
By The Baron

1t is reported that two million dishwash
ers have declared war on turkey, china and
grease.
Boston Brave Beans. We win. Phlla-
delphia perpetually perPlexed. We lose.
Easy on the beans, Jawn.
Mex is now first grade hero. Butch
promotes him to the Lancer S Commissiarat,
viz, the pie department.
Said lawn to Mtt last Sunday; Gee,
but do miss Sherlock, | can't get any
body angry, since he left here.
Huerta and Diaz continue to lay plots,
while the hens lay eggs-quick Sherlock
the hatchway. The ship lays to. 90
1t is said, that the War costs Great Bri-
tain, ffty-hve dollars second. 1t cost
j. Corbet:, one hundred thousand beans,
in ter seconds.-The haymaker.
Frosty Face-At, the movies. Gee,
OATS swell goil.''
Waiter Mac .-"Hoots mon, d we no ken,
the Lassie heard We blitherin, did We no see
her locking, when we were spearin ABBOTT
herr
Avis. lie Communique Official annon-
cant cette nouvelle ajoute que les Cavaliers
ont egalement du rerraiter apres avoir toular
forcer (censor) revieres St. Croix Saltwater
lie Freres Vache George with his sub-sec-
ton of Butchers captures Les ennemi Mon
Siuer.
Wot's der matter wild youse, said Frosty
Face to Ad. the colored elevator boy. 81
sub feel sick coon Sah.' replied Ad.
"Y ouse are soitantly looking white, have
youse been putting Talcum powder on yer
face, or are youse looking sick on purpose, "
concluded the sarcastic Frosty.
81 see,' said Cabbagis stumpicus, Cook
the fifth, THAT some one dropped bomb
in Dublin the other day. can Oh see, :"
quothed Pat, the dishwasher, ''foive Buns
dropped off freight train, in Duluth wonst,
an Bull chased thin fer about a MOLE.
Dye mind, Mister Cabbage stump Be-
dad.
Norwegian Scenes, the musical classic,
which was chosen by the Professor, for the
orchestra selection last Sunday, was execu-
ted by the prison orchestra with rare skill,
the incitant thrills which were prevalent
at times seemed to arouse the congregation
feel proud of his orchestra.
Rat, he has been mentioned in dispatches
Music by Monsieur Sherlock)
We rescuded our losses, one and half
dead HOSES,
Generalissimo Butch and |. were carried
shoulder high,
And presented, with Quinine, and, Iron
tonic crosses.
The crosses were made of adhesive plaster,
etc.
An instantaneous, and, paneless method,
to cure a headache, says lawn, is to seize
the head, firmly between the hands, and,
violently push the head through a pane of
glass, taking great care not to injure the
frame, and to observe, that stray police
man is not in the vicinity, you must always
be able to procure little loose change, etc.
"Dot ss, you grab der pain nit der head,
den der Bolicemans hands in his pocket
you put, nit der, er-er-dot rotten zyoke
ISIS Zjawn,' said Hugo.
''Suffern' Joisey Tom Cats yelled
Frosty Face, as the Chef dropped a milk
can, on the floor dat guy likes ter
hear noise, he did dat on poipose, why
don't youse join der choir Gee! It's der
pictures ter night, went on Frosty, hope
dat Dutch Cop swipes the Sarge's Coil den
bats him on the beak, concluded the chronic
crouch, as he looked at the chef, and sang.
Music by Cello Joe). Shoity der cook
he boint all der soap. Pipe dat guy wild
der crutch, wat talking ter Butch, etc.
''Did you ever hear of the Irishman who
stole the rope" asked Prof. Bugtrala'
Men, said Hugo, ''vat iss him'' Pat
saw rope tied to Church Steeple, and,
with the agility of a monkey, he took a
knife between his teeth, climbed to the top
of the steeple, cut the rope, and dropped
down to the bottom, and strange to say,
the only damage he did was break his pipe.
So, der Pat Teller, he did der monkey climb,
nit der steeple in iss mouth. and der knife
it iss he did break not, nit iss pipe. Hoch
der monkey"