The Anderson daily intelligencer. [volume] (Anderson, S.C.) 1914-1915, 1914-06-05
, o 90 o oooo 5000 O O
HERE AND THERE. o
o 900 100000 5000 % o O o

" ~ " " v u y y y U U . U o o o
why won't YOU buy something
at my table," demanded the girl at the
| charity fair
Because only buy from the home
ly girls said the man. They have a
harder ME making sales"
The girl was not offended. and he
worked this right down the line
Louisville Courier-JOurnal.
Chicag0an who employs Swedish
maid overheard the following CONVEX
sa:!0n the other day between the cook
and the maid next door. also Swede:
How are sou. Hilda?"
II we'll, like my lob. We got ere
mated cellar. cemetery plumbing elias
tic lights--and a 'hoosit'''
What's "a 'hoOsit.' IIilda?"
"Ch. a bell rings. Yon put q thing
one says. Hello an you say 'hoosit'"
commercial traveller entered the
, postofiice in an eastern city, walked
to the glass case containing letters
held for postage and after counting
them. purchased enough stamps to re-
post them and sent them on to their
destinations. The assistant post
master commended him OH the
action and asked how he came to
do this. He explained that at one
time the kindness Of some man
who forwarded letter addressed
TO him saved him s400. He has
ever since made II practice to for
ward delayed mail
A teacher was instructing her pupils
In the use of u hyphen. Among the
examples given by the children was
the word "bird-cage"
That's right" encouragingly re-
marked the teacher. Now. Paul, tell
me why we put hyphen in bird cage
Its for the bird to sit on" was the
startling rejoinder.
You say this man is no chicken
rtealer?" inquired the Judge
"Yassnh;" replied Mr.. Erastus
What do you know about the facts
In this case?"
II isn't s'posed TO know muffin
bout de facks in de- case. Is an
expert witness for the Defense" =
Washington Star
The City Council of Chicago by
large vote recently passed the ordin-
ances for the union passenger and
freight terminals for that city to be
erected at an expense Of $66 200, 900. |
The council also created q Railway
Terminals Commission and passed an
ordinance providing for the boule-
ward line binding the north and south
sides with double deck bridge n;
Rush street, doubling the facilities for |
north and south communication at a |
point said to carry the heaviest mix
ed traffic OF any thoroughfare in the |
world. This improvement Is 10 cost |
an additional $7.000,00O.
The travelling men OF Beaumont |
Texas, recently celebrated the open-
Ing Of their fine and corhmodious. club |
quarters In that city.
well-known member of the Irish !
Dar WAS on one occasion counsel for |
the persecution at an important trial |
for murder. He had a box of lozen-
ges 10 one hand and In the other d
small pistol bullet by which the man |
had met his death. Between the |
pauses of his address he kept supply.
Ing himself with lozenge. But at |
last. In the very middle OF a high |
falutfn' period he stopped. HIS legal |
chest heaved. his eyes seemed starting |
from his head. and in voice tremu- |
lous with fright. he exclaimed.
"Oh-h-h! Gentlemen. gentlemen. I've
swallowed the bullet"
S. G. Mason of Independence, Iowa.
recently observed his forty-afth an
ntversary as a salesman. lie irst |
started on the road for j. 8. Sherman, |
now with the Webster Seed ConDanv
bill Of fare?"
:, Waiter: There was. sir, but
wiped 1t off."-California Pelican.
Did you come back on an ll.ateel
train?" l.
when the walters and po-ters
finished picking me. felt sure that It
was. Birmingham Age-Herald.
One Of the BOSSES ut Baldwin's lo:
comotive Works had to lay on an argu-
,mentattve Irishman named Pat, so he
saved discussion by putting the dis
charged In writing. The next day |
Pat was missing but week iatur tho |
boss was passing through tho shop
and he saw him again at his lathe.
Going up to the Irishman. he demand
ed flercely: az
Didn't you get my letter?"
"Yis. sur. OF did," said Pat.
did you read It?
"Sur, sur, Oi read II inside ami Oi
read It outside" said Pat. "and OIL the
Inside yez said was fired, anil on the
outside yez said. return to Baldwins
Locomotive Works In f1ve- days."
Lippint otis.