davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Parker post., 1914-12-05
CHILDREN SHOULD NOT WEEP
Wise Man Says to Cry on Any Day In
Week Is Bad-RuIes No Good for
Older Boys and Girls.

There are millions of children in the
thing and the very best thing; but
they do not always know what just the
right thing is, and sometimes they can
not tell the very best thing from the
very worst thing.
Now have often thought that there
are children who cry, now and then, at
the wrong time; and I have asked
many Of the older people, but none of
them could tell me the best time to
cry.
But the other day met man older
and wiser than any Of the rest. He
was very old and very wise, and he
told me:
It is bad luck to cry on Monday.
To cry on Tuesday makes the eyes
red.
Crying on Wednesday is bad for chill
drens heads, and for the heads of
older people.
It is said that If child begins to-
cry on Thursday he will find it hard to
stop.
It is not best for children to cry on
Friday-it makes them unhappy.
Never cry on Saturday-it Is too
busy q day.
Tears shed on Sunday are salt and
bitter.
Children should on no account cry
at night; the nights are for sleep.
They may cry whenever else they
please, but not at any Of these times
unless it is for something serious.
wrote down the rules just as the
old man gave them to me. OF course
they will be of no use to the Older
boys and girls.-St. Nicholas.
The Parker post., 1914-12-05
NOSE WAS A GOOD SLEEPER
Aged Darky on Witness Stand Said
He Could Remember Nothing
After His Long Sleep.

The lawyer got tartar when in a
recent trial in a southern city he
summoned to the stand an aged dar-
ky who had been an eyewitness Of
Fight that had occurred between a
number of persons.
Tell us what you know about this
fight" said the counsel, when old
Nose had been placed on the stand
Fight" asked Nose, apparently
greatly surprised. What fight?"
you know very well what fight I
meant" said the counsel. "Tell us
about it."
II don't know nothin' about fight"
Insisted the witness. What was it?'
See here, Mose!" exclaimed the
lawyer; mo trifling. The fight day
before yesterday. You know all about
1t. Tell US
"Oh, de fight day befo' yesterday" ="
said Nose. well, sub, you see Use
slept since de day befo' yesterday
and I never kin rickollect anything
after Use been asleep"
And that was all they could get
from him.-Louisville Herald.
The Parker post., 1914-12-05
Quick Relief When
Utterly Worn Out
Getting the Blood in Order
Is Required By Most
People.

If you think you have gone to smash and
fit only for the discard, try S. S. S. for the
blood 1t will surprise you to know what
can be done for health once the blood Is
released of the excess of body wastes that
keep it from exercising it's full measure OF
bodily repair.
If you feel played out, go to any drug
store and ask for bottle of s. s. s. Here
is a remedy that gets at work in twink
ling; it just naturally rushes right into
your blood, scatters germs right and left,
up and down and sideways.
You feel better at once, not from a slim
ulant, not from the action of drugs, but
from the rational effect Of natural medi-
cine.
The ingredients in s. s. S. serve the
active purpose Of SO stimulating the cellular
tissues of the body that they pick out from
the blood their own essential nutr1ment and
thus repair work begins at once. The relief
Is general all over the system.
Do not neglect to get bottle OF 8. 5. 3,
today. 1t will make you feel better in just
a few minutes. 1t is prepared only in the
laboratory Of The Swift Specific Co., 53O
Swift Bldg, Atlanta, Ga. Send for theii
free book telling of the many strange con
ditions that af1ict the human family b.
reason Of impoverished blood.
The Parker post., 1914-12-05

use the whip. If the dog, as he will
sometimes do, knowingly and willfully
disobeys. the whip may be used spar
ingly.
One sharp blow is generally suffi-
cient, and it should be accompanied
with reprimand in words. Never lose
your patience and beat the animal in
anger. To successfully train a dog, it
is necessary to place the greatest re-
straint upon your own feelings; for if
you once give way to anger the dog
will know it, and one-half your influ-
ence is lost. To be sure, the special
line of education depends upon the
kind of dog you have and what you
want him to do.
You may commence to teach the
pointer or setter to stand" at a very
early age, using first piece of meat,
praising and petting him when he does
well and reprimandins him when re-
quired. Do not tire your pup out; but
If he does well once, let him play and
sleep before trying again.
AS he grows older, replace the meat
with a dead bird. The best sportsmen
of today do not allow their dogs t, re-
trieve, saying that the "mouthing" Of
the dead and bloody birds affects the
fineness of their noses. To bring in
birds, the sportsman has following at
his heels cocker spaniel, large
poodle, or almost any kind of dog,
which is taught to follow patiently
and obediently until game is killed and
he receives the order to fetch"
To teach a dog to retrieve, COM
mence with the young pup. Almost
The Parker post., 1914-12-05
LIFE IS BEST AFTER FIFTY
No Previous Period Of Ones Exist
ence May Be Compared With
That One.

Neither the beauty Of spring
flowers, nor the splendor of summers
harvests, equal the mellow af1uence
of autumn's glory. For personal en-
joyment and exercise of the nobler
powers, human life is at it's best after
fifty; and, if personal experience be
the criterion, the writer would say,
after sixty.
Not for command, or for executive
initiation, neither for animal pleas
ures, nor for worldly amusements, nor
for easy conformity to the tyranny
Of social custom, but for pure delight
in the higher realms of happiness, no
previous period in life, no April, May
or even June or July Of existence can
compare with it's glorious October
Then are at their best the treas
ures of memory and Of hope, the rich
fruitage of intellectual culture, the
satisfying pleasures of the mind and
the raptures of faith. From these re-
sources Is spread the table of life as
never before, and for the daily ban
quet at which sits as guest, the IN
finite friend of man.
Life, as it lengthens in perspective,
becomes more interesting, and it's out
look grander. There is ever more
that one wishes to live for, here or
hereafter. If one has cultivated his
mind and taken a wider view of his
tory and humanity, then for him the
drudgery of textbooks, the grammar
and dictionary are largely over. He
sees with clear vision where he once
groped to find a clue. He enters into
his intellectual Inheritance. Where
was the sowing is now. the reaping-
sheaves borne where once tears fell.
He is no longer the heir, under tutors
and governors, but the possessor OF
riches, of which no slump in the mar
ket, no panics or national convulsions
can rob him.-From "The House We
Live In,'' By DR.. William Elliot Griffis.
The Parker post., 1914-12-05

any dog will chase a ball, and very
soon learn to bring it to his master.
When you have taught your dog to
'fetch," he may be tried with game. It
is very probable that the first birds he
brings will be badly "mouthed"-that
is, bitten and mangled. To break him
of this, prepare ball of yarn so wound
over pins that the slightest pressure
will cause the points to protrude and
prick any object pressed against the
ball.
After the dog has pricked his mouth
once or twice with this ball, he will
learn to pick it up and carry it in the
most delicate manner. He may then
be tried again with bird. This TIM
he will probably bring it to you with
out so much as rumpling a feather;
but if, Notwithstanding his experience
with the ball of pins, your dog still
mouths" the game, you must skin a
bird and arrange the ball and pins in
side the skin so as to prick sharply
upon light pressure. Make dog
"fetch" the bird skin until he is com
pletely broken of his bad habit of bit
ing or "mouthing" game.
With pointers and settlers, at first
you will have to give your commands
by word of mouth; but if you accom-
pany each command by an appropriate
gesture, the pup will soon learn to un-
derstand and obey the slightest mo-
tion of the hand or head. The less
noise there is, the greater the chance
for game. Nothing is more unsports-
manlike than shouting in loud voice
to your dog while in the field.
After teaching dog to "heel,''
down charge" and to "hie on" at
command, you may show him game
and teach him to quarter" his ground
by moving yourself in the direction
you wish the dog to go. The dog will
not be long in understanding and obey.
ing.
When your pointer comes to point,
teach him to be steady by repeating
softly, STEADY, boy, steady" at the
same time holding up your hand. In
course of time the words may be omit.
ted; the hand raised as a caution will
keep the dog steady; but should he
break point and flush the game, as a
young dog is more than liable to, you
may give him the whip and at the
same time use some appropriate words
that the dog will remember. The next
time the words without the whip will
correct him.
After your dog has been taught to
obey, it is well to put him in the field
with an old, well-trained dog.
AS every sportsman has peculiar
system of his own for breaking dog,
it is scarcely necessary to give more
than these few hints; only let me eau
tion you once more against using the
whip too often. Spare the lash and
keep a good stock of patience on hand.
Otherwise in breaking the dog you
will also break his spirit and have a
mean, treacherous animal that will
stink and cringe at your slightest look,
but seldom obey you when he thinks
he is out of reach of the dreaded whip.
The Parker post., 1914-12-05
RESINOL WILL SURELY
STOP THAT ITCHING

What blessed relief! Fhe moment
resinol ointment touches itching skin,
the itching stops and healing begins.
That is why doctors have prescribed it
successfully for nineteen years in even
the severest, stubbornest cases of &C.
zema, letter, ringworm, rashes and
other tormenting, unsightly skin-erup-
tions. With the help of warm baths
with resinol soap, resinol ointment re-
stores the skin or scalp to perfect
health and comfort, quickly, easily
and at little cost. At all druggists
Adv.
The Parker post., 1914-12-05
A Sufficient Reason

Rudolph" said the judge, not un-
kindly, here you are again charged
with drunkenness. What have you to
say?"
Judge" began the Teuton, II tell
you I vas painting house in de nord
side by a home where der vas a
French poodle dog. Den lady comes
in and says to dat poodle: Come here,
Bismarck Den 7"
"Discharged!" roared the judge
Buffalo Commercial.
The Parker post., 1914-12-05
Impedimenta,

Excuse me, sir" said the strap
hanger, "but would you mind moving
your portmanteau from the gangway?
really can hardly find room to
stand"
Move my portmanteau," gasped the
stranger, those, sir, are my feet!"
"Is that so?" said Jenkins, then
perhaps you would pile them one
above the other ?"-Western Mail.
The Parker post., 1914-12-05
UnintentionaI,

Judge-You are charged with break
Ing chair over your wife's head.
Prisoner-It was an accident, your
honor.
Judge-What! Didn't you intend to
hit her?
Prisoner-Yes, but didn't intend to
break the chair
The Parker post., 1914-12-05
He May Regret It.

Clarence-Did you wead that the
deuced dyes they use to color cloth
Ing will no longer be obtainable be-
cause of the horrid wah?
Reggie-Deah, deah! What's a fell
low to do? Dwess in black?
Clarence-If we are to dwess in
black I shall feel almost sorry mothah
didn't insist upon making me clergy
man, don't you Cleveland
Plain Dealer
The Parker post., 1914-12-05
DON'T GET RUN DOWN

Weak and miserable. If you have
Kidney or Bladder trouble, Headache,
Backache, Dizziness, Nervousness, and
feel tired all over, get a package of
MOTHER GRAY'S AROMATIC-LEAF.
1t never fails. Sold by all Druggists or
sent by mail for SOC. Sample sent
FREE. Address, The Mother Gray Co.,
LIE Roy, N. Y. (Advt.)
The Parker post., 1914-12-05
Paradoxical.

"It seems to me that I have seen
you somewhere BEFORE" said the con-
fidence man, suavely.
TITS quite likely that you've seen
nae before" said the detective. "A
number Of times I've been close be.
hind you"
The Parker post., 1914-12-05
Mioht Help Some,

Bill-A New Jersey inventor has
patented semaphore railroad signal
In which the arm is outlined with a
vacuum tube electric light so it may
be readily seen at night.
Jill-Wonder if they could be util-
tzed on women's elongated hatpins?"
The Parker post., 1914-12-05
Foreign Censorship.

The sky came over very dark and
murky one day last week. We tried
to quiet lady relative who Is ner-
vous of thunderstorms with the re-
mark that it was only the censorship
But it was of no avail.-Bystander
The Parker post., 1914-12-05
A Bad Record.

Drunk plead bein' a bit drunk,
yer washup.
Magistrate Prisoner known to the
police, constable?
Constable Ryan-Indade he is, sor;
he's been here foive tonnes for bein'
robbed and twoice for bein' assaulted
wild wiolence.-Boston Evening Tran.
script.
The Parker post., 1914-12-05
Too Easv

"Why did he quarrel with her? Hs
told me he was going to beg her to
marry him"
"She was too willing. She wanted
to get married the same day he Bro
posed"
The Parker post., 1914-12-05
All He Came For.

'Mr. Green has called to pay his
respects to you, sir"
disappointed again. l thought he'd
some to paw me that ten he owes"
The Parker post., 1914-12-05
A Social Matter.

"Jonesby had a doctor with him all
night."
'Was he very sick?"
"He was toward the last when tho
aoctor held all the good hands"
The Parker post., 1914-12-05
YOUR OWN DRUGGIST WILL TELL You

Try Murine Eye Remedy for Red, Weak, Watery
Eyes and Granulated Eyelids; No Smarting-
Just Eye Comfort. Write for Book of the Eye
by mail Free. Murine Eye Remedy Co., Chicago.
The Parker post., 1914-12-05

Sandy Stork-What are you laugh
Ing at?
Sam Stork-I was just thinking what
q joke on humanity it would be If we
were to go on strike.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1914-05-25
SON OF LOCAL MAN
TELLS ABOUT MEXICO
DIR, T.. Il. WAFFLE RECEIVES IN.
TERESTING LETTER OF
CONDITIONS THERE.

b. s. Waite. local expressman. has
received from his son. DR.. f. B. Waf-
fle a copy Of letter written by the
Doctors brother-in-law, Sig A. Young,
to ]. G. Clinton Of Astoria. The let
ter gives some very interesting infor-
nation regarding Mexico and is as
follows:
That conditions in the section Of
Mexico. which is under the control OF
the rebels are not so serene as they
might be is shown by a letter receiy-
ed by j. C. Clinton from Sig. A.
Young of this city. The letter is dat
ed at Camille, Ariz., on April Is, and
says in part: Was down into the
state of Sonora, in Hermosiilo. Didn't
stay very long as II wasn't conducive
and bit trying To a nervous man. My
intention was to taeke a pack outfit
about $50 miles southeast of Hermo-
sillo. This would have brought me
into the main stamping grounds OF
| the rebels, brigands and whatnots
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1914-05-25
PAGE FIVE

I couldn't flash any United states
money for some fellow would eoves
II and to that there could be put o1ss
outcome. ! was freely warnci nv
keep my opinions and sympathy tc
myself. Even neutrality wasn't any
too secure They don't want Amcri-
cans in the country. or any other for
eigners. either. spaniards have BEEN
deported wholesale and their prop-
erty confiscated. AS they cross shG
border line into this country. they xar
examined by the immigration officers
and their dispositions taken. NinetN
per cent say that Intervention Is the
only way. even though they depIorc
the necessity and apologize for their
seeming lack OF patriotism Villa iss
bad egg. You can call him every
thing evil in existence and then not
have him painted truely. His only
virture. II one may call 1t that. Is thar
he is some fighter II things dop'-
improve soon I am coming north
again. I don't want to develop into
a 'watchful waiter.'"
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1914-05-25

principally the latter two. II would
have been a tight fit. II could have
gotten through with my outfit with
the chances so much in favor OF being
put afaot that it wouldn't appeal TO
lazy man. | figure on trying ii again
pretty soon, If the conditions will
ease up a little. The weather is some
hot for a man with thick blood and
I'm fried to a doughnut brown. II
could put some black In my eyes. ia
make good Mex. The border towns
are full of pretty senoritas. a cOmbi-
nation Of blueblack hair, grey eyes.
Teutonic cheeks and teeth as White
as the belly of fresh run Chinook,
sure looks good to a lonesome bache-
lor. an old married man either Life
always was cheap in Mexico. but now
il hasn't any value at all. poor Pc
on has to smile two different avs at
once and II some fellow. notch
above him. hands him a jolt, he has
to say not only that he likes II but
also asks for more. / saw two men,
blindfolded and standing at the edge
OF an open grave. with their breasts
bare. get a bunch of lead from tie
firing squad and topple over, as T.
they were so much putty. Their
crime was a freely spoken sympathy
for the opposite side. The country
is full of worthless money. mlnted by
the rebels and given purchasing pow
er by the bayonets. / wanted to go
down into the federal country but
there asn't anyway to carry money.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1914-05-25
PERSONAL MENTION

NJ. Forest Of Athena is at the ST
George.
C. L Sands of Adams spent satur-
day in the city.
Willis E. Vincent Jr. of Salem is at
the Bowman.
ID. F. Bunch Of Adams was a Sum
Cay visitor in the city.
w. G. Seaman of Milton was a Sat
urday visitor in Pendleton.
Charles Hunt is among the Helix
residents in the city today.
Dan Clark, livestock man of the o.
w. r. & n, is in the city today.
Mrs, Will shannon came IN this
morning from Helix on the y. P.
train.
Meryin Hutchinson was among the
Pilot Rock people in the city over sun
day.
Mrs. C. S. Terpening returned this
morning from visit in Cheney
Washington.
E. r. Lester was among the Sunday
people here. Mr.. Testers home is II
Pilot Rock.
Royal NJ. Sawtelle. local jeweler
will return in the morning from ;
brief visit in Portland.
c. r. Whittenberger, who has jus
closed term of school at Pilot Rock
was here yesterday enroute to Milton
Mrs. A. F. Toningsen of Ontario
Ore, is visiting Mrs. F. Z. Payne an
expects to spend week in Pendle
ton.
j. F. Robinson, of the Domesti
laundry, returned home this mornin
from Spokane where espent a fe'
days in business.
I A. ID. Frost manager of the Golde
Rule Store in this city, iu enroute I
New York with a number of othe
buyers for the chain of Golden Rul
stores to make fall purchases. The
will be gone about two months.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1914-05-25
O. Advertising in Brief
wanted--Good, clean rags at the
east Oregonian office.

East Oregonian office.
Saddle horses for hire. Tracy Layne
Dutch Henry Feed Yard.
For Sale-Bundle hay. Inquire w.
w. Harrah. phone 395 w.
For sale-Good milch COW with
calf. Injuire &c" this office
For Rents roomed house. Call
w. w. Harrah, 395 w.
Victor and Edison monographs and
records at Warren's Music House.
Wanted Modern room cottage
close in. Inquire TX" this office.
Wanted. loan of $4,000, good Sc
curity. Address IL. A. W." this Of
flee.
Lady with boy 4 years old desires
general housework. Address "W."
this office.
For sale-studebaker buggy and
single driving harness in first class
condition. Inquire Jerard & Temple.
Hazelwood ice cream sold in bulk at
the Charles Co, 715 Main street. Fur
nished in bricks If given "a hours
notice.
i Old papers for sale; tied In bun
ules. Good for starting fires. etc. 15c
bundle or two bundles for 25c.
This office.
For sale-Two modern cottages To-
Gated on east Court street seven
blocks from Main street. Inquire OF
Walters mill.
Hazelwood ice cream sold in bulk
at the Charles Co., us Main street
Furnished in bricks if given "a hours
! notice.
When in Echo. stop at the
Hotel Hoskins. Fully renovated and
under new management. Good meals
and rooms. Csc and up.
Lost. north of town on Cold Springs
road. kit of automobile tools. Return
to Farmers Union Agency for suitable
reward.
Mutt" takes the big loads and
"Jeff' shows the speed. Penlant
Bros. haul anything and reasonable
Furniture van and storage warehouse
office CAT Main street. Phone 339.
Strayed or stolen from my place a
Mission. black horse weight abou
400 ioa-ds. branded p. G. on ief
hip and left shoulder. Liberal re
ward offered for any information
leading to recovery OF same. L. II
Geiss, Pendleton, ore.
Passengers for Portland desiring {
refreshing ride on the Columbia rivel
SHOULD take the str. Bailey CATER
at The DalleA daily except Sunda.
and Monday, at 3:15 p. m, arriving il
Portland at S:45 p. m. Fare, Tn,
Dalles to Portland. s10O.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1914-05-25
woMAN's SUFFRAGE.

may eventually give to women rights
to which they are entitled, but good
health, which is the birthright OF ev-
cry American woman, must be hers
before she can fully enjoy the privil-
eges which woman's suffrage will
bring. Women who suffer from those
dreadful pains, backache, headaches,
irritability, nervousness and depres-
sion, symptoms of organic trouble,
should rely on Lydia E. Pinkham's
Vegetable Compound, which is made
from roots and herbs. to restore them
to normal healthy condition as It has
thousands of other American wmen.
ADV.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1914-05-25
Standing of Clubs.

Next Sundays Games.
Milton-Freewater at Pendleton.
Weston at Pilot Rock.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1914-05-25
EXCLUSIVE PLUMBERS
eS.s eSSss ssd s,.! Reddow & Miller 7s'sSs0ns 5es
Notice TO Cut Weeds.

Notice is hereby given to all per-
sons to cut or have cut and destroyed
all noxious weeds and grasses upon
all lots and grounds owned or occu-
pied by them in The City ot pendle-
ton or upon the streets fronting on
the same forthwith under penalty of
the ordinance in such case made and
provided.
BY order OF Street Committee.
Dated May IA, 1914.
THos. FITZ GERALD.
(Adv.) City Recorder.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1914-05-25
East End Crops EYne :

East End Crops Fine That the
Milton n-Freewater section of the coun-
ty this year will have an unusually
large fruit crop is the statement made
yesterday by Rev. E. w. Warrington
of Freewater, who was here to
preach the baccalaureate sermon at
the high scchool. Earl strawberries
were the only fruit to suffer any in
jury at all, he says. and the increase
in the other crops will more than
compensate for this loss Many OF
the growers are now engaged In thin
ming out their peaches, he states.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1914-05-25
BIDS ON HILL TERMINALS
OPENED IN PORTLAND

PORTLAND, Ore, May 25.-Bids
on terminals for Hill steamships at
Flavel will be opened today and the
work completed by November 80, ac-
cording to an announcement of Pres
ident L. C. Gilman of the North Bank.
The plans provide dock 60 feet long,
and a depot adjoining on the main
land $50 feet long.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1914-05-25

Captain Vivian Lockett of Lord
Wimborne's British team of challeng-
ers. who will be with the team when
they sail for New York on Saturday.
The Englishmen figure on getting a
few days practice on this side before
competing with the Yankee defend
ers in the matches for the Interna-
tional Polo Trophy.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1914-05-25

Loss OF Appetite is also loss Of vita :
ity, vigor tone. To recover appetite
and the rest take Hoods SarsapariII,t
that strengthens the stomach. per-
fects digestion, makes eating "A pleas-
ure. 1t also makes the blood rich
and pure, and steadies the nerves
Adv
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1914-05-25
Attention Knights.

Damon Lodge. No. 4, knights OF
Pythias. will meet in regular conven-
tion this evening. The matter of
building a hall will be discussed and
refreshments win be served.
(Adv.) C. p. STRAIN, C. C.
East Oregonian : E.O. (Pendleton, OR) 1888-current, 1914-05-25
BLUE MOUNTAIN LEAGUE.
Yesterdays Games.

At Weston-Milton-F -Freewater g.
Weston 4. Batteries Bartholomew
and Rennick; shick and Blomgren.
At Pendleton--Pilot Rock a.. Pen.
dleton 2 Batteries: Darling and Al
brecht; Duff and Pasco