The Washburn leader. [volume] (Washburn, McLean County, N.D.) 1890-1986, 1914-12-25
ABachelor' S
Complaint
3, F. A.

l should be tied by u%nbreakable chains
to one Of those paradoxical. eas
able. illogical creatures. a woman.
Why my bosom friend. Jim Brown.
had to put a tirebrand between him
self and me l can't imagine. We were
inseparable. never felt at home with
any other person as with him. and
without me he did not know what to
do with himself. Suddenly there pop.
ped up between us-Ehat? Clothes
many clothes. clothes varying In cut
with every season. And within these
clothes was q wOman
There Is nothing unreasonable about
me. | would have been perfectly will
ing that Jim should 60 to see this
much adorned grownup child once a
week and stay till 3 in the morning
II be liked. certainly would never
have thought of being Jealous of one
who is not endowed with a spark Of
manliness. But she was not satisfied
with this. She wanted him. all the
time. And Jim. poor beggar. was 80
under her thumb that she did what
she liked with him.
Then she must needs nag ut him to
bring me to see her Why she wished
to meet me was a puzzle. ! certainly
had no desire to meet her. do bring
your friend. He must be a lovely nan
since you are SO fond Of him." And
Jim was fool enough to believe that
she wanted to meet me because was
"a lovely man."
Just as soon as they were engaged
there was friction as to the evenings
she wanted Jim and those ! wanted
him. |. being a reasonable creature.
was willing to divide .Jim's evenings
with her. Not 30 she. II Jim made
an engagement with me she would
make him break it.
Despite all this pulling and hauling
for Jim's companionship. he must
bring that lovely friend of his to e
her. refused to go. This frightened
Jim. for he said that it would create
an enmity between her and me that
would be unpleasant all round. gave
in to Jim-not to her.
Considering what she wanted me for.
her treatment of me was remarkable.
You would have thought she was In
love with me instead of Jim. I'm aw-
fully glad to see your she said. all
smiles. 1--WE heard 30 much about
you that It seems l have known you
q long while. You have no idea how
fond Jim is of you. You must come
and see me often. Any n that Jim
speaks Of 80 highly must be very nice"
II you had heard the intonation she
gave the words very NICE you would
have realized the irony between the
beginning and ending Of this sentence.
Mind you. I didn't see through all
this then. l confess ! was fooled
while she was showing plainly that
she had an object In fooling me. No
one but q woman can coddle q man
and let him know that she is stunning
him without repelling him. Instead Of
repelling she winds him round her 6D.
ger while she is feeding him poison.
But I know It all now Jim was
married. and when he returned from
his wedding trip he tried to grasp my
hand with fervor. but 1t was not the
same fervor as before. knew that
I had been supplanted. and. more than
this. I knew that his wife had under
mined his good opinion of me. Then
It became apparent why she wished
Jim to bring me to see her. She
couldn't attack one she had never seen.
or If she did her onslaught would have
had M weight She must have some,
thing tangible to attack.
$50 this is the wonderful man."
doubt not sheasaid after seeing me.
that y0u have been lauaing to the
skies Why did he not sag some OF
those bright things that you have 50
often spoken Of? Didn't feel well
enough acquainted2 I suppose ! shall
have to wait till he does Some day
when he feels more at home here l pre-
sumo he will deluge us with his wit"
What a melancholy awakening Jim
must have had after this first In.
spection by his ladylove Of his bosom
friend to discover that I was after all
a commonplace person! And how sin
gular 1t ia that these creatures. who do
not know the difference between q
syllogism and sole leather. can produce
on a man Of intellectual vigor the effect
they require BY mere irony! Jim had
known the intimately for years. and
yet BY q few words a woman had shat
tered bis idol.
Jim has u relapse occasionally and
drops into my oom for Il bit of ''oId
times" IN he calls them But he
knows they are not old times: they are
altered times. Doubtless he thinks
that for him they are changed for the
better: that be Is leaving me In q sta.
uonary position. while he has id.
vanced- At any rate. ! have noticed
that those things I continue to enjoy.
or think l enjoy. are beginning to bore
him. II ! speak Of q new play on the
ooards be will turn the subject to the
smart sayings Of his little Jim. Then.
too. he has become absorbed In piling
up money for his wife and children
after be has gone. He says It 10 awful
to think Of leaving them without sup
port. It seems to me that In getting
married he gave up all the fun there
10 In life to make 4 slave Of himself.
Sometimes ] wonder whether Il Jim