South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1914-04-02
STATESMEN
REAL AND NEAR
BY FIRED @ KELLY.

ndO NeeTeO around 10 the matter tOf
horrible experiences, Senator Charles /
+. Townsend of Michigan recalled
the time that he served as the awful
example at medical clinic
When he was attending the Univer- |
sity Of Michigan, Townsend had little
or no money, and had to work at odd
jobs while his more fortunate class
mates were gathered together singing
stein songs. One day when he was
particularly lacking in ready money,
he ran a long piece of wire into the
side of his foot. and he soon became
so lame that he was unable to per-
form even the mildest chore. His
foot swelled to the size of a Smith
field ham.
To employ the services of a high
priced doctor was out OF the ques-
ton, so Townsend went TO the medi
cal school and inquired if he couldn't
make himself useful as a victim for
their clinic.
The medical professor he consulted
seemed greatly pleased over the in
teresting appearance OF the injured
foot and told Townsend that he would
be most welcome as an object of
study.
Townsend presented himself at the
appointed hour to be operated on
within full view of the audience.
do you wish to take an anaesthe
tic?" inquired the professor, who was
TO perform the operation.
Townsend knew II would hurt, and
wavered for a moment, but his cur
iosity prevailed. He wished to be
awake to know what all they did to
him. The idea Of a class of COMPARE
tive strangers knowing things about
his foot that he would not know him
self seemed unfair. He said, there
| fore, that il 1t was all the same he
would Just stay awake and witness the
operation.
The pain will be something ex-
cruciating," the professor told him,
| cheerfully.
II know" admitted Townsend, but
I want to see it all"
The professor put on his operating
| clothes and began the entertainment.
| 1T is evident" he said to the class.
| in a pleasing optimistic tone, that
/ either a piece Of wire or a portion of
! the sock has become imbedded deep
! back into the foot, and already there
are grave indications OF blood poison
ing. IL we can arrest the blood
! poisoning we may be able TO avoid
amputating the entire foot, and in
that way perhaps save the patients
life There is a very serious condi-
! ZION mere, anu IL Is SOlHS 10 DC OK
i tremely painful to our young subject,
whether we save his foot or not"
| Now it may have been unparlia-
mentary for the victim OF the per-
! Torrance to take part in the discus
sion. but at that point young Town
send injected a remark of his own.
! He suggested with great seriousness:
"Oh. sir. please let's talk about
| something else?"
Senator Townsend, by the way. was
a champion wrestler and boxer in his
college days. From the time he left
college until the present time he has
had just one occasion to make prac-
teal use of his fstic powers. That
was when he was recorder of deeds
for his county in Michigan a few
! years ago. A man and his wife came
in one day TO transfer piece of land.
! When the money had been paid over
the wife, a timid-looking little wom-
an, inquired If she were not TO have
part Of it for hers.
Nav" replied the man, as he
tucked the roll of bills into his pocket.
The woman demurred timidly, and
the man, a husky weighing about 210
pounds turned and slapped her.
Wait just one minute" said Town
send. at that point In the proceed
ings. land I'll show you somethingi"
He rushed around from behind his
counter and knocked the man down
by means OF a sharp, quick wallop
in the jaw.
The man arose, said that perhaps
he had been a little hasty, and went
his way.
Victor Berger. the Milwaukee So
cialist, formerly a member of con-
gresS, is so free-handed that he has
but he has a brother, George, living
up in Connecticut who is more thrifty
and has amassed a comfortable lit
tie fortune.
One day. some time ago. a friend
OF the Connecticut Berger met him
, on the street and said:
Il saw a picture of your brother
Victor. in the Saturday Evening Post
Did you see it?''
Whats that-the New York Post p
asked Berger.
: mo, the Saturday Evening Post
published at Philadelphia, you know
You ought 10 buy copy and see Vic
tors picture. IL only costs a nickel
. I'll go and buy it," replied Berger
Costs a nickel. eh?"
He started on, then paused ano
came back.
: say" he asked. don't you sup.
pose that papers in the reading room
st the public library? Well, l guess
, I'll go and look at it there
It is the proud boast of Represen
r tative Walker of Georgia. who is one
;. of the most faultlessly dressed men il
congress. and who looks thoroughly
to-the- menu born. that he went bare
. footed until he was almost 10 year
/ OF age.
} Copyright. 1914. by Fred c. Kelly
Z All rights reserved.)
Twenty Years Ago