davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
La prensa. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1913-1962, 1914-12-16
La duquesa de Luxemburgo.

He aqui 10 que refiere una
de las mas serias reviStaS de
Paris: la duquesa Maria de Lu-
XemburgO, que cuando los ale
names invadieron su %territorio,
atraves6 Su auto en- el canine,
sufre las conSecuencias de csc
acto. La duquesa ha sido lleva-
da Ell calidad dc prisionera a
Nuremberg. Solo hace dos amos
que era soberana del gran du-
cado, Y es de la famiiia de los
Braganza por Inca materna.
La prensa. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1913-1962, 1914-12-16

NECESITAMOS: agentes para colocar
segurosdc Socicdad Mutualista. Logia Me-
xicana. Iguales quotas para Scnoras y Ca
ballcros. Sc ~ofrccen bucnaS cOndicioneS n
agcntcs a~ctiyos. -Diriiasc n Box J3j. Gu
dad.
La prensa. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1913-1962, 1914-12-16
POI WEST COMMERCE ST

Segun Sc asegura, en- los dlti-
mos amos Ia casa de HOhenzO-
llern guerra que cOntrajera ma
trimoniO con un principe de
Prussia; pero la sOberana de La
Xemburgo Sc haOia negado
siempre a clio.
La prensa. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1913-1962, 1914-12-16
Ell trigo en- Austria.

SegGn 10 refiere la "Neue
Freie Press" de Viena, ell mer-
cado de cereales nunca Sc ha-
bia encontrado en- condolences
tan anomalies como ahora en-
Austria. En- Ell momento de Ia
cosecha, las proviSiones del ano
ultimo eran insignificantes. La
guerra ha impedido los traba-
Jos a los recolectoreS. Los pre-
clos han aumentado mucho.
Cuando subi6 ell preciO del tri-
go a 80 Y 80 coronas, los cul-
tivadOres no ocultaron su salts
facci6n Y iamas lutheran sos
pechado las predicciones mas
atrevidas que ell precio del tri-
go alcanzaria en- POGO tempo:
80 Y 40 coronas. AnteS de la de
claraci6n de la guerra, en- ra-
ION de la insuficiencia de los
"stocs," el precio de la harina
subi6 a cerca de A coronas los
Glen kilos. Hoy Sc ha llegado a
cerca de 60 coronas.
La prensa. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1913-1962, 1914-12-16

NOTICIA..- Visite la cantina Ell Ps
lacio de los Cuernos" Y yea la collection
mas grande de cueFnos de Tenado. So
licitamos clientele mexicana- La can.
tns esta sttua5a contigua 8 Ia Corte Co
lorada.
La prensa. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1913-1962, 1914-12-16

Entire amigos:
Vista. -iQu6 espl6ndido servi-
clio de mesa tienes.
La duena de Ia casa. -Tengo
otro mejor, que 10 reserve para
cuando viene genie
La prensa. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1913-1962, 1914-12-16
Lcroy-Beaulieu y Ia guerra.

Ell cGlebre economists Paul
Leroy-Beaulieu do hace POGO,
en- la academia de cienciaS mo-
rales Y politicas de Paris, una
conferencia acerca de la que
rra actual. Segun Leroy, la que
RIA cueSta d cada una de las
PotenciaS beligeranets mil mi
Homes por mes. 81 Sc ticne en-
cuenta que las hoStilidades du-
raran SciS 0 siete meses, los
gastOs de Ia lucha, sin agregar
ia destruction del material y
de las Cbras de arte, Sc elevara
a treinta Y cinco mil millones.
Ademas, cOntando ell ~esfuerZO
de las pequenas POtencias, Ia
les como Servia, B6lgica Y ell
Jap6n, ell gasto total sera de
treinta y ocho a treinta y nue.
We mil millones. Ell periodic
cOmprendido entire la conclu-
sion de la guerra y Ia firma de
Ia paz, Sc prolongara cerca de
dos meses Y Ell gasto Sc elevara
entonces a is, 900 100000. NJ.
Leroy-Beaulieu termino su con
ferencia diciendo que la norma
lidad financiera no Sc restable-
cera sino hasta despues de Gin
co amos.
La prensa. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1913-1962, 1914-12-16
AcTUAL-IDADES ExTRANJERAS

clio de esa ciudad Sc reunl0 pa
"a acordar impOrtantes medl-
das. Despu6s de varias juntaS,
Sc declare a los peri0dicos que
habia que eSpera- que la Sltua-
ci6n mejorara prOntO, y que Sc
aguardaba que los fabricantes
de la region Norte de Francia
volvieran a emprender sus ira
bajos. La Camara declare, ade-
mas, que las cOlOnias francesas
de Solferino en- 1855, fueron
las primeras de que Ia Prensa
de Europa recibi6 nOticias tele-
graficaS, SiendO un VerdaderO
acontecimiento Gle ell publlco
celebro con gran entuSlaSmo,
pues por csc medic pOdia eStar
al cOrriente de cuantO Ocurrla
en- los campos dOnde estaban
Sus deudOs. En- este TEMPO,
Reuter- sostenia cOrresponSaleS
en- los ejercitoS de Austria, de
Francia Y de Inglaterra, que a
diario lie comunicaban las mott
ciaS de la campana. Durante
la guerra civil de los EstadoS
Unidos. todOs los acontecimlen-
tos mas SalienteS de ella Sc da-
ban a cCnocer eli Inglaterra
Dor medic del cable. En- las COS
tas inglesaS, recibian las mott
cias peQuenos barcOs costa
nerOs, que Sc encargaban de
hacerlaS llegar a su destino pOr
conducto de lineas telcgraficas
particulares. CuandO fue aseSi-
nado ell presidente Lincoln, de
representa- una production de
Glen mil toneladas de aZucar,
cue Sc pueden destinar dnica-
mente a Francia. La cosecha
de las islas de Reunion Sc es-
peraba de un momento a otro,
V Sc aumentaria con las de la
Martinica y de Guadalupe. Sc
iba a dar aSimiSmo una aten-
ci0n especial q las medidas to-
madas por el GobiernO inglGs,
Ell que, a fin de solucionar las
dificultades de la situaci6n, ha-
bia asegurado una provision de
noVecientas mil toneladas de
azUcar para ell ano en- curse.
La prensa. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1913-1962, 1914-12-16

J. O. Terrell.-Presidente.
J. ] Stevens-Vice Pdte. Active.
Otto koehler. Vice Presidente.
Chas. Schreiner.- Vice Presidente.
Ed. Rand.-Vice Presidente.
w. 7. ROte. Secretario.
La prensa. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1913-1962, 1914-12-16
Los cinematografos err NueVa
York.

Segun 10 refiercn varies pc
ri6dicos de los ES.ados JnidoS,
dos cinemat6grafos de NIeva
York anunciaron una seric de
representations CARA IN do
mingO. Este hecho motive una
energica protesta de varios MI
nistros de las iglesias de esa
ciudad contra csc atentado a
las leyes de la religion. FL dl-
rector de unO de los cines ase-
gur6 que Sc eXhibirian solo Vls
tas de asunt0S rciigiosos. Los
ministries contestaron que no
dirian NADIA 81 Sc admitia gratis
a la genie y 81 a la mitad del
eSpectaculo Sc preSentaba a los
espectadores I'm cepillo para
que dieran limOsnaS. Los due
nos del cine aceptaron, y de E.
sa manera Sc so-ucioT6 el con-
flicto.
La prensa. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1913-1962, 1914-12-16
VENTAS.

CON S25 co, contado Y SIS co mensua-
ies vendt mos magoiicOs Totes de terre-
NJ va.or 500 Marin & Gutierrez 800
DuIo!Osa St.
La prensa. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1913-1962, 1914-12-16

NECESITO IN ar :bivero Y una GAIA
f1erte Ge medic uso Tel. T 3S70. Do
loross st. j NJ Montemayor.
La prensa. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1913-1962, 1914-12-16

Siempre a clio.
Las noticias de TODD cl mundo
I'"o "e 'o'To P''- W. li1 .NI
Il" "iO"iiA""0 ''' 10 'oc"''-.'
"i." i"p'0eA -"
iIiieii'0 que '''"'" lt"S i'Jo'
"e 'eiiei ""'T ""oH
"i'o'' O""ii"' i"' "o.' a.
usll'eS ue I'll" ""o''I con "e'
t'no o'I@ cram lI"g"ieli'"ii@S
y 1"tu"'"H 'ieA'po s''
Iles"l'
maze "p'ii"S iiTui Sigio' ."
Nus heu'eI' u" S"oio "ie''i'ii
cGhclOlo l" gi"iIuIoS" lue" ue
aOt!r UNA PeqUe"@ oi'cti'" Iei'-
gfaIlcd ell /" cloo"o o9 LUZ
"IeS' "e'i'p0 ~
y ois"i'iAU III C.'!'40 0e '''IVA
~ t'l d,
La prensa. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1913-1962, 1914-12-16

La lmportaclon del azucar
En- vista de la carencia del
azucar en- ell mercado de Paris,
con motive del actual conflicto
europeo, la Camara de Conner
La prensa. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1913-1962, 1914-12-16

OLA PRENSA" publica to-
das las noticias tai como son,
sin 'hacerle la barba a nadie"
The day book. [volume] (Chicago, Ill.) 1911-1917, 1914-01-21

Nov, Georgia" said the teacher,
81 want to explain the lenses to you.
Suppose l say, I have a million
dollars What tense would that be-"
"That'd be pretense~ answered
George.
The day book. [volume] (Chicago, Ill.) 1911-1917, 1914-01-21

A weII-known judge entered res
taurant where he had dined before.
''Will you try our turtle soup? Z asked
the waiter. 81 have tried it once"
said the Judge, 'and my opinion is
that the turtle proved an alibir'
The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1914-04-12

One Of our graduates wrote us one
time that In our instructions on how to
open and close doors we said nothing
about revolving" doors and he wanted
his tuition back. He said that the first
place he went they had a revolving door.
He didn't know how to work II and he
couldn't get In so he lost the sale and
then lost his job for losing the sale.
Since then, however. Prof. Bojack has
made a special trip clear outside Of
Yokel county to investigate the subject
personally. and ne finds that tho revolv-
ing door has come into use only within
the past thirty or forty years. He gives
the following simple yet scientific
formula for operating: Push; then
follow up"
While Prof's report ia perhaps 4 bit
brief. still II Is conclusive. and easily
grasped by the lay mind.
1t must be remembered. too. that II
required a great deal OF preliminary
investigation and costly experiment
before he learned the correct way to
work these revolving doors. Prof lost
two fingers and broke a leg the first
time he got mixed up with one.
The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1914-04-12
: II. The GETAWAY,

The next thing to DO, II you are still
running at large. Is to find out II your
man Is at home. There is no use trying
to talk to him II he Is not there, and
mental telepathy IL not to be relied upon
except when the message Is verified In
writing.
II your customer II really away and
won't he back for a couple OF months
II wouldn'; be advisable to sit around
the place waiting for him to return.
You might 60 over to the hotel and play
pinochle with the clerk until he comes
back, or II you are foolish enough TO
waste your time attending 10 business
you can go on to other towns and re-
turn again.
We knew Of a salesman ono time who
solid months waiting for Mr.. Souse OF
the Arm Of Souse 4 Co to return. All
Of a sudden It occurred to him that he
could perhaps fill H. the balance OF the
year a little more probably by finding
out Just when Mr.. Souse was expected
back.
''Let's see" he said TO the clerk. "I
believe you are the gent who told me
some months ago that Mr.. souse was
not IMP"
"That's what I told YOU" answered
the clerk.
well, then" said our clever sales
man, would you mind telling me when
you expect Mr.. Souse back?"
I'VE don't eXpec, Mr.. Souse back at
ALL" replied the clerk calmly. Hes
The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1914-04-12
ftWo Cards the Pack and Each Depicts Work
Designer Of Cards Years Getting afor Figures

Mrs. Rogers Jemima Boone, Mrs. VOL
colt, Mrs. Schuyler, SacagR- wea, Betsy
Ross. Barbara F'rietchic, Mrs. stanton.
Or, Blackwell
The crowns incluie Hat-Shep-set OF
Egypt, Esther Of the Modes and Per
SLAMS Margaret OF scotland Eliza bet n
of York, Isabella Of Castle, Elizabeth Of
England, Marie Therese OF Austria,
Luise Of Prussia, Tzu-hsi Of China, El,z-
aheth OF i,umania, Wilhom.na of the
Netherlands, Elena OF Italy Sadako Of
Japan.
Serpents temhlems OF immortalityI
specify IIypatla, Jeanne dare, Vittorla
collona, Miss ueyschell, Mme, do Stael.
The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1914-04-12
|. Warming Up.

Many sa'esmen th'nk that al you heeo
on the road II ao''itv wrong! iou We
got TO have something to seh--some
definite tangible line or goods ana II
must be line suitable 10 the traoe you
intend to call on You couldn't expect
to put In faro layout at Y w. e. A.
nor sell fur lined pa1amas on the banks
Of the Congo.
Before starting out to Interview your
customer you should know something
about your line and not leave II 10 your
customer to explain It to you. III you
are selling ploughs' Tor instance you
should know which end OF plough TO
hitch to, and be able to tell pIough
from a bathtub without first walking
all around II and viewing It from DIFF
The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1914-04-12

your customer how all the folks are, or
some such question relative to the sale.
If he declines 10 answer use the fol-
low up system. II he says he hasn't
any folks he probably has neighbors.
Ask him how they are.
A short. snappy observation on the
weather is often effective. II It is
rainy, sloppy day say to him: "Miser-
able day we're having" He probably
didn't notice the fact when he came in
without an umbrella and drenchcd 20
his union suit. and this bit of original
comment. will likely arouse his atten-
ton. II it doesn't. try some other tack
anything but carpet
Should he be writing a private letter
when you come in you might show q
little friendly interest by leaning over
his shoulder and reading what he has
written. making such suggestions for
alteration and improvement as may oc-
cur to you.
An occasional compliment tossed AT
the lady's photograph that adorns your
customers private desk viii not 20
amiss Suppose you say In simple bu:
sincere English, Gee, what, good
locker your wife Is" or something like
tHdt. II sHpNS upPi cciot4o!A'
II the woman turns out to he your
customers stenographer instead of his
wife what OF it? He probably has
tender spot in his heart for he steroe-
rapher that covers the whole area, Be
sides he may introduce you Ia her.
a rather unique and fetching way
to secure attention is to carry small
upright plano around with you. and be-
fore your customer observes your pres
ence, wheel 1t over near his desk and
begin tearing OFF a few yards OF good
snappy ragt!me.
Another way. not quite 60 expensive
but equally effective, is to shoot Off an
ordinary cavalry revolver i've or six
times over your customers head or
push a bucket of hot mush on him.
Any OF the foregoing methods can he
safely relied upon 10 direct your mans
attention and few ink bottles your
way And rs the proper time TO sp.l
your spiel about your goods,
The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1914-04-12
Y. Third Lap (Resolve).

Having finally thrown the halter Of
desire over the nice square head OF your
customer you now lead him gently up
to the trough of resolve.
Right here is where many statesmen
20 to the mat. They are able TO coax
their victim right UP close TO the trap
whore he can sniff the cheese, but they
can't get him TO sink a tooth into q.
They lack judgment, slipping over
syllable too much or n syllable to little.
Prof. Boiack himself in his early days
m the road once lost a sale of i've
crates of onions by eXCus.rg himself 4
the psychological moment 20 80 hunt
Cor "A chigger that had been amusing
tse'f digging small holes in his back
and filing up the holes with chieee-
We heard of another salesman ous
time who lost sac 10y asking his Gus
toner NJ the critical moment to Sniy
loan him a quarter SO he could 20 pay
a game Of pool with a friend II"
should never have asked for thai quar-
ter just at the climax Of the sale HH
should have Kept right Oh 'alt.ug
meanwhile bunting quietly In h., cGs-
toner's pocket For the necessary
change without uncoup''nC his Gall %,
thought.
Tn" keen salesman should know the
psychological, moment iGtu.tiyc,y G-d
not expect IL to come out and cough,
sneeze, wave its avn. or eve other
nervous evidence OF its presence Psy-
GEOLOGICAL moments never ~ tha'.
To get the order signed j. more
delicate operation than rcn"' ~ an
cnllr.cd ,ro from 'hr COSMOS u a
new branch house manager. Tie very
Instant you fash Your order 'ooh a
strange something comes between YOU
and NoGr man.
For that reason the order boot 81 W 4
he introduced without any accompany
ing brass band. Don't whip 70 olt Z
your pocket as + you Were pu Ing a
gun, Its bad enough.
can your customers at. nr'u 20
something on the ceiling TO- yell h.m
10 close his eyes u mome,t C. look
out of the window. While h. IS FAILING
for II fash the book and begin & Ing
IN nar". date, terms, sc.
Before he has .lme 20 head you =
ask him If sixty gross woe,1 %. TOO
many, and when he says my--,'-ycs
then put down the number that NJ
thinks WI be about r.ght. aGl'uG tl K
as many as he VIII s!gn f1r without
noticing the crime committed
The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1914-04-12

your goods. Your competitor will at
tend to that.
In this way you get tho bug Of de-
sire into your customers porphyry coco
and desire is the third sweet verse in
the song of the sale.
You must make your customer long
for your goods like the suffra sette longs
FOR the ballot. and any kind of exhor-
tation. contortion. Salome dance. or mem
tai or emotional sandbagging is JUS
tihahlc. II you can make him sit up
and beg tor your goods like "A stag
spaniel. So much the better.
Ten him what a darn fool he'll be Il
he doesn't buy. That's always a
clncher. Call him any name he'll stand
for. without becoming too profare. but
hold his interest at all costs--even If
you have t. lose the order.
Tell him how YOU sold a million dol
lars worth OF goods yesterday, a half
million the dav before ard expect to
DO three-quarters OF million to-mor-
row. but don't get too excited later on
when YOU land him for a 81 80 order,
or he might gather the suspicion that
you are something OF daml.ar.
Introduce the human interest feature
every time you get chance. Let your
voice down a few notChes and tell your
customer some pathetic little story OF
your early struggles on the road, or
your love for home and evening news
paper which YOU seldom soe--mean-
while gently brushing the daadrur
flakes from his coat collar or tumbang
button on his vest.
In tumb!inE said button. keep rea-
sonab.y FAR away from his watch pocket.
II avoids suspicion as we'll as tempta-
ton.
Tender, Guivcrinr little stories abou:
life and love or that wonderful blue
eyed baby boy " yours that cries all
over his little bib for YOU. return hut
must cry on un:l papa lis thi, par
ticular bill Of goods are most effective
means O! bringing the most stubborn
customer around, Such a recitation
properly executed Will draw tears from
a frozen hydrart
II isn't essential that you actually
have son ~ a home AID Preside in
order 10 the proper effect, Remem-
bor you are selling q bill ot goods. not
making an appeal for domestic conces-
s!cns.
II ~ any time your customer shows
Sigh, sirns NJ W ar.ness. such as yawn-
IN" street, hing or falling asleep. you
should arouse him with one of those
good old O'MaNcvs OF yours that will
double him up like a jackNnlfe II he
laughs 50 long that you suspect he's
purpose'y delaying the sale toll him YOU
didn't come there TO see hin. make a
fool Of himself and to 81, mp and behave.
once get your customer taK.ng orders
The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1914-04-12

you are using pretty strong language.
The nifty salesman will soon discover
which OF the five senses to appeal to In
order to crib attention.
a certain representative for . large
perfumery house tells us ne has been
pretty successful In getting attention
through the sense OF smell. As soon as
ne enters his customers Office he lays a
neat piece OF cheese OF ancient and hon
orable birth upon the desk. adding at
the same time, "F'ierce, isn't IT,
The customer has nose
"Ah. hs!" adds the shrewd salesman
quickly before the customer has had
time TO formulate coherent reply I'm
bet you can't say the Same thing about
our line OF fine perfumes" And he
quickly pushes under the customers OIL
factory knob an uncorked bottle OF Slob-
bins Violet Victory.
There lie some difference" Gnsps the
customer. grabbing the bottle eagerly
and taking q few long three finger
whiffs, meanwhile trying by various mo-
lions TO persuade the frontage to set
sail.
The salesman has got his customers
attention. That's what he wanted
Some statesmen md the sense Of sight
a short cut to attention. A certain spe-
cialty salesman Zone OF our graduates
OF course). handling q patent cleaning
fluid. writes Us that he has met with
great success in getting the attention Of
his trade by first doing few neat
s!eight OF hand tricks with an ordinary
tomato.
The customer nj f,rsf indifferent anon
finds himself fascinated and guessing
for all he's worth where the juicy and
elusive tomato has vanished to.
KS up your sleeve he says OK
c.tedly.
That's where you're wrong" replies
the salesman; you are sitting on II"
Naturally the customer Is not exactly
t!ckled to death when he discovers half
the tomato on the seat OF his chair and
The other hal: on the seat OF his
trousers. but the ingenious salesman
promptly shows him how TO remove the
stains with his patent cleaning fluid
II he doesn't remove the stains he
at least succeeds in removing enough OF
the original color OF The fabric to get
the attention OF the man who owns the
trousers,
In a majority Of sales the customer )
attention is secured through his sense
of hearing. To make sure that IL Is
IN good working order go up and hurl
some harsh and husky epithe' in Your
customers ear. II the tympanum g
still tltillating you Will get a reYy 1t
his earliest convenience,
A good way Is to lead off by asking
The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1914-04-12

Mrs, Sommerville, George Eliot, Jean
lnHcloW, ltoso Bonheur Mss Nightin-
gale, Mrs. Browning. Nine. Curle, Ida
Lewis.
Maltese crosses (emblems OF sufyer-
lnGl, Mary Queen of Scots Lady Jane
Grey, Marie Antonette, tho carriers IT
Germany, hsherwumen Of France, field
hands OF Russia. burden hearers Of Italy,
golden lilies cor crushed footed women
of China, traffic of Japan, muza'od
women OF England. taxed women OF
America.
There should be four or more players.
The first cutting queen becomes dealer
aud distributes the cards one by one.
The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1914-04-12
III. First Lap (Attention).

Right here Is whore the salesman
must be hep on how TO get his mans
attention. II you haven't got his at
tention you mlght as well so out 70 the
stable and talk TO the currycomb
The only salesman who can keep on
talking his line when his customer
isn't listening Is the genus insurance
solicitor He's got his talk down SO
fine that he doesn't even listen 10 II
himself.
The student should remem' er that
attention is secured through one or
more OF the five senses Some sales
men show their samples when their
customer is not looking. They expect
him to hear the samples Others talk
their line when their man is not listen
ing, expecting him 10 smell the convgr-
sation. This last can't be done unless
The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1914-04-12
. of a Queen who nourished 1000

PLOTS of Queen who fourshed 1000
years ago form one OF the incidents
illustrated on the cards. Others. rang
Ing down to the present day, depict the
exploits Of woman rulers, doctors. scien-
lists, war leaders and martyrs.
There are four suits. Bells symbolic
the women Of the United States. crowns
represent royal women Of distinction,
srrprnts indicate noteworthy women and
maltese crosses the oppressed women of
dlnerent countries unprotected by Just
laws
The bell suit comprises Mrs. Washing
ton, Lady Kitty Duer, pUcahontas. Ma
taukl. the Ladye vi Iieusse.a.rswyck,
The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1914-04-12

dead--been dead for twenty years--the
business is merely run under his name"
You see. therefore. it Is not only
necessary to find out II your customer
IL away hut also when he ia expected
back-if at all. Had the salesman in
question not been smooth enough to
finally find out when Mr. Souse was
coming back he might have been wait
ing there vet. AS 1t was he lost only
eiSh months.
Finding your man at home, however.
changes the situation. The thing to do
then is TO discover the best way TO
make him stand still long enough for
you to get up close to him. 1t wouldn't
be advisable to shoot him.
Three ways are open. You can either
do a quick sprint to his desk or take
of your shoes and sneak up quietly on
your hands and knees or blow up the
stretch on n motorcycle. The motor liz
discouraged on account Of its noisy be-
havior and the disadvantage OF ga,lop-
ing up like a horse is that you run the
risk OF tramping on your customers
face-entailing possible loss OF order
and probable punch In neck
We recommend sneaking up In your
hosiery and tossing a little salt in the
vicinity OF your customers natty
Rogers Poet while he sits at his desk
oblivious OF your game. A dash or two
OF good table salt will do
When you have finished these pre-
liminaries staid erect and cough twice
like this 'uch- uch-uumm, UGH UGH
uuuummmm" so as TO attract your
customers attention, and then take of
your hat politely and hang II on his ear.
The ear nearest you 10 preferable. You
can use the other one to hang your coat
on later when the argument warns up
bit. Next extend your card politely
and wait for an II s. V. Il.