The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1914-01-09

grow more dependent. I haven't the
courage that | once had. can see thar
even in my Homework. This spring We
are going to have that door cut
through from the hall to the dining
room. You know We have planned that
for several years. But. somehow, just
to get everything ready for the men
seems to me such an effort. And |
even dread the hOuseCleanin2 this
year. And the cloth you sent me
Christmas for a suit haven't had it
made up yet, just because | dreaded
taking 1t OF the dressmaker's and plan
ming it out. | am SO afraid she will
spoil it that keep putting it off.
Now, I know all this is just because
l am growing old. So perhaps | should
not let my fears influence you. You're
young. and have most of your life be-
fore you. And if you think that sooner
or later you will have to make some
radical change-perhaps you had bet
ter make it now.
For your sake, Helen, I wish that
was younger, so that you could lean
upon me more. But this winter feel
that I have aged a great deal The
rheumatism in my hand is worse. and
at times it is all through my arm and
winter on your father. too; he stOOps
more than I have ever seen him. and
he is more feeble than when you were
here last year. SO YOU see, dear, We
are both getting old, and that is why
| so dread to think Of you without all
the protection Of your husband and
your home.
Well, dear, | am afraid this is not
very cheerful letter or a very helpful
one, and yet one that | felt | should
write. | shall be anxious to hear from
you. Write often, if only a few lines
Try to keep we'll, for, after all. health
is the greatest thing. And it will be
easier for you to meet any conditions
that may come up if yOu are we'll and
strong.
With much love to you and Winifrod
MOTHER.
| Helen read this letter with the feel
ing that somehow her mother had fail
ed her. She realized now how much
she wanted to hold to her. But this
letter only showed that she could not.
1t only made her feel that more than
ever she stood alone.
Again she read the passages where
her mother said she was growing Old
that everything now seemed an un-
dertaking. 1t almost terrified her
Somehow she had never thought of
her mother as ever growing really old
She had vaguely felt that she could
never change, that age with its veal k
ening influences would never claim
her
And she had looked forward to this
letter as one that would give her
courage. and would strengthen her in
her plans. Instead 1t had shattered
what courage she had-it had made
her feel all her helplessness and ina
bility.
And more than this her mother had
questioned the wisdom of her atti-
tude towards Warren's mother and
also her determination to keep the
roomer.
She took up her mothers letter
and read it again. Don't think I'm try
ing to weaken you if you are convinc-
ed that your happiness lies in being
independent" And yet the letter had
weakened her and her mother knew
that it would.
For the moment Helen had almost a
fierce contempt for her own waverine
indeciion. She thought of her many
determinations which she had never
carried out. NO wonder Warren scott
ed at her assertions of independence
Looking back on the last few months
she realized that she had made one
plan after another and had carried out
none Of them.
There came over her feeling al
most of fatalism-that whenever she
tried to assert any veStige of indie
pendence, in SINE way some influence
always swept her back to the accept
ance of conditions as they were
Was it always to be like this? Was
she really the victim of some curious
fatality. Or was it only because she
had so long been underWarren's dom
mating, tyrannizing will that it haC
crushed out any real courage she haC
ever had.