The Birmingham age-herald., 1914-04-26

crew. He wrenched thim firm tn embrace iv tn law, corded thim up in an open boat, an took thm to tn ship. Thin he wint an reported to tn captain. Did ye get our gallant crew, sir?' says tn captain did, sir says tn loot dhrunk, sir says tn loot Dhreadfu sir says captain. What did ye do with thim. sir? says he. Locked thim up downstairs sir says tn loot, with gyves upon their ankles says he Good says tn captain Dhrunkenness is tn curse iv tn common sailor man. It must be sup pressed with firm hand he says Have dhrink, sir he says
 Well, Josephus Daniels says this is all wrong. He says, says he. it IS ondmmycratic an that that has been idiacated at tn expinse iv tn nation has no more right to get pickled thin a poor fellow that's been onidja- cated at his own expinse. He intinds to restore dirnmycratic akequality in tn navy an tn way to do that, iv coorse, is not to give wan fellow tn same another gets but to take something away firm tn other fellow. If yeve got money an I'm broke don't give money. That's wrong. Break us both A meetin' iv adrnirals was called as soon as tn ordher come out an they offered compromise. It to let tn crews an tn screty iv tn navy dhrink as much as they liked. But Josephus he says no. No matther how thin tn wine or mild tn beer tn bold fellows can have none iv it with their meals They must ate their hardtack an salt horse with nawthin' to dilute it stronger thin tn hateful ilinint that floats their ship. Be hivens, askin' sailor man to dhrink wather is like askin' railroad njineer to ate tn right iv way
 But so it is, an tn navy, tn pa-apers says, is all stirred up over it. They say twill put thm in bad with foreign navies an that to ask British admiral to come to dinner an thin offer him grape juice may lead to blows. They say that afther tn first iv nex' July yell be readin' in tn pa-apers Giberaltar, fifteenth On tn approach iv tn American fleet tn British, German an Fr-rinch fleets put hurrdy out to sea- F'r gross niglict iv jooty in snkin' his ship while undher tn infoonce iv liquor tn Ger man Admiral Vassertyfel has been rejooced twinty numbers an ordhered to dine on boord tn American flagship durin' tn month iv Au- gust It is rumored that he has shot himsilf
 They want to know why it is if tn navy's supply iv paint is cut off ivrybody who dhraws more thin two dollars day firm tn govermint shudden't have his magazines flooded with nom combustible drinks. It's good pint too, an I'd like to hear what Wilum Jennings Bryan has to say about it. He ought to issue an ordher to tn ambassadures to bar tn odjous stuff firm their tables. Maybe he will. Twinty years firm now ye may read in Life iv George tn Fifth :: Tn king visited tn American ambassadure yisterdah afthernoon. Firm two to five his ixcil- lincy entertained his majesty with southren anecdote. He was just gettin' to tn place where he explains tn relations iv tn Carters iv Vir- ginya an tn McCarters iv North Caroliny,whin his majesty showed signs iv faintness an ast fir dhrink. Tn ambassadure explained that he'd be fired if he kept dhrink on tn premises, but, cautioning tn king that it wud be as much as his job was worth to have it known, he con-