davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1914-09-16

Have you thought about how this may change
whole tariff system2
With foreign competition laid low and not likely
to be felt for years to come, what earthly need
our infant industries going to have for continued
"protecton'' against Europe's 'pauper" labor9
Moreover, when the wars ended and Europe
toner of Uncle Sam unless help to rebuild her
ability to buy by buying of her ourselves-buying
what she is better able to make than are and not
gripping the trade by putting almost prohibitve
duty on it,
Instead of high wall to keep imports out, don't
be surprised if we'd find the need of very low
wall wall at ala need also based "protec-
tion to home industries"
But how, in that event, get to the gov
ernmentf
Well we've already started an income tax-start-
ed 1t low. 1t can be raised.
Then there's the chance to take for public needs
the "unearned increment" values in land. That
would more than pay every bill.
e. u. Il. old timers who are planning another high
tariff campaign might do well to think again.
Judging by the way retreating generals fall back
to tsmore strategic positions" that war territory
must be full of them.
Now they're denying that Sherman ever said
stWar is he'll" Oh we'll maybe Uncle Bill said
ft was that, but that's what he made it.
Hon A @. Spaulding, being philosophical is going
to pray for peace on both Sept. g and Oct Ought
10 help some.
"osrmany' s navy bottled upl" says headline. and
e looks as If the British navy were bottled out.
During the excitement Turkey win gobbIe up some
rights OF independence And maybe she II work up a
licking for herself By all christendom. later on
Not one case Of drunkenness in Mexico City last
Sunday Most Of the Sunday crowds must have gone
abroad With Huerfa-
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1914-09-16
sAPErY FIRST

A little girl walked into . gro
GERS store ut Bayside, l.. l.. and
ordered a nickel's worth Of ami
NAL crackers.
The clerk was IN the act Of
putting the purchase in = paper
sack when the small patron halt
ed him, asking.
Are there any elephants in
these animal crackersg
oh. yes" said the clerk:
lots OF elephants"
Then please pick them all cut
and put 'em back IN the box
again" ordered the customer
Ny little brother Is afraid Of
elephants - Saturday ExsnInR
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1914-09-16

test robes of green. The water
was quiet. Nature was at her
best. And the bride and groom,
both In tastiness of dress and in
spirits, were in harmony with ma
ture.-Kearney (Neb.D Hub.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1914-09-16
A WARNING

The scene and the occasion
we're both beautiful and inspir-
ing The music was furnished By
the birds. which were at their
best - this bridal day. A mead
oNlark called 20 his mate across
the lake. asking n he might cosne
ard fein her. A brown THRASH IN
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1914-09-16

a tree on the hill nearby sent
forth across the water a carol fun
of love and melody such as a
Beethoven or a Chopin would
strive in vain to initiate. The
hills were dressed in their pref
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1914-09-16

Tacoma man yesterday fined $500 in police
court after confessng to theft He stole brass from
his employers for whom he had worked ten years.
Had he been wealthy malefactor he would have
paid his $500 and gone free. Being poor he must go
to Jail to sswork out" the fine. There is law for
the rich and quite another law for the poor.
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1914-09-16

srmany's navy bottled upl" says headlin
Ks as IL the British navy were bottled out
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1914-09-16

Not one case Of drunkenness in Mexico City last
Sunday. Most Of the Sunday crowds must have gone
abroad With Huerta-
The Tacoma times. [volume] (Tacoma, Wash.) 1903-1949, 1914-09-16
PLENTY OF OPPORTUNITY

gins?" ~ " ' o wy 's. op''s-
"A canal digger,
But all the canals dug Mrs spriggias"
Well then he throw th dirt n
The evening times. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1906-1914, 1914-03-17
The Evening Story ~
II
LADY WHO

Calista Temple stood beside her Ii
brary table packing her bag for the
fourth time. She only was snatching
a last pitiful excuse for delay.
Her store of courage always had
been small and the events Of the last
two months had depleted it to such an
extent that she sometimes wondered
how she was to go on living at all.
She knew only n thing we'll. and
that was the management Of a home
where n SerNant did the unpleasant.
heavy work. She was married at
eighteen after II desultory seminary
education. and for eighteen years
more had been as happy and COM
Portable as normal woman may eN-
pect. Victor had cherished her, and
she had allowed him to do so. He
earned plenty n had superb pro-
portions of brain and Drawn. He had
given Calista Just the kind OF home
II wanted, and mad set her up where
h could condescend 10 almost every
body else i'll the w Calista had
not c~ondescended. She always had
generous in giving OF her means and
gracious iii giving of herself. And
n believed every person save one in
the town was her sincere friend.
Suddenly Victor died, and Calista
was left alone. Neither Victor nor
She hid ear relatives. And there
had never been any children. They
had had each other ana thai sufilccd.
She found what many women find
when their husbands die suddenly.
that Nictor's income was about all
the money he had commended. He
had saved nothing. Neither had he
any life Insurance. There was the
house, but it was not all paid for,
although she was not likely to be
troubled about that for some time.
The real question was a brcad-and-
butter one. iiuW to meet actual every
day expenses. Calista lay awake
many nights trying To formulate
some plan by which she could acquire
a livelihood.
She thought of selling some Of her
furniture. but h loved every stick
OF 1t. There was nothing in the
house which was not hailowed by a
happy memory. she thought of rent
ing some of her rooms. of taking
The evening times. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1906-1914, 1914-03-17
SPEECHES.

Ambassador Page makes a speech
ic:t day the United states senate
"anted to know about ii. Mr.. Page
%as reported to have said a number
~ things TO which several senator's
;nrk exception. The charge against
aim, as ii was announced, was that
ie had gone out nj his way to soft
zap Great Britain. and that the pur-
phrt of his remarks was to kick over
The Monroe doctrine. make q present
of the: Panama lanai to Great Britain,
and do 4 lot of other things which
on American sensibi!ities.
1t seems that Mr.. Page did nothing
q the sort. According to information
since received, he made All after din
yer speech. in which. in the course
of some remarks more or less IA
cetious. he took occasion 10 speak
pleasantly of the good feeling existing
between the TWO English speaking ma
tons on opposite sides of the Atlantic.
IS We recall some Of MIR. Bryce's
speeches. Mr.. Page did not go nearly
as far III his expressions of friendship
as the former ambassador from Great
Britain did on n number of occasions
on this side. And We DO not remem-
her hat objection vas raised on eth
The evening times. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1906-1914, 1914-03-17
GENERAL KELLEY AND HIS
ARMY.

\ Sacramento dispatch reads:
"Members of General kelley's job
less army fished for catfish and skates
from the banks of the Yolo levee, roll
ed in the sand and took in desultory
recruits while ~wrangling between Yolo
and Sacramento counties over policy
delayed them"
General kelley'S army evacuated
Sacramento last Monday under the
very persuasive influence of fire hose,
says the Chicago Record-Herald. he
fore taking possession of Sacramento
it had invaded Sa nF'ranc.sco and Oak
land. An Oakland paper points with
pride To the fact that while San Fran
cisco cnddled the army Oakland Yield
ed TO Nc such weakness. 1t had Il
helpers assisted the army ove the
border by giving the members close
personal attention, Selling them by the
scruff of the neck and the seat of tho
brooches and making them walk tur-
key. This explains their sudden ap-
peararce in Contra Costa county.
Contra Costa COUNT has heritage
on its hills and orchards in its valleys,
hut is short on free lunches, and the
army tarried not, but proceeded to
Sacramento, a i%lourishing city of TO-
900 people. There had been division
in the ranks and General Kelley hal
been denounced as a CRATER, but di-
visions were now forgotten in devotion
to the common c;use Food was de-
manded from Sacramento. also SIS.
900 IN cash. A time of great disquiet
ensued. State troops were rushed in
from surrounding towns. a sheriff
swore in men and did other swearing.
A citizens committee thought of earn
ing the eternal gratitude of San Fran
cisco by hiring a train and shipping
the army back to hat town. General
limited at possible crimes that ho
would prevent if he could.
To relieve the tension the army
played ball, caught fish, ate rations
that were distributed and slept. 1t
was beautiful sunny weather, the sand
lots were inviting, and Washington,
ar imaginary objective point, was
more than 5000 miles away. Mem
bers of the army uttered the discor-
certing threat that if efforts were
made to drive out they would lie down
SO that it would be necessary to lift
them bodily, no mean task with a vast
multitude Of 600 men.
But the hose did the business and
the army departed over the NJ street
bridge into Yolo county. westward,
not eastward. General Kelley and
other generals We're arrested. 1t is
a queer farce. hut not all farce. Min
gled with tralnps and irresponsible
BOYS were men who, it would seem,
actually hoped To get work in this
mos unpron1isins way.
The evening times. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1906-1914, 1914-03-17
Laugh With U.

Richard lie Gallienne. the poet, was
talking in New York about the hard
ships Of a poets lot.
there's no money in it.. Have you
heard the latest about. the we'll known
poet, Pindar Oade?"
Mrs. Oade nudged her husband in
the dead Of night and whispered:
"'Pindar, wake up! There's burg
lars in the house!"
Well. what Of it?' said Pindar
oade, sleepily. Let them find out
mistake for themselves"
In a certain neighborhOod there re-
sided an honest farmer, who was not
easily swerved from the path of recti-
tude. He owned q horse which a
couple Of traders wished to possess.
They called on the farmer, and after
some haggling gave him his price and
drove off with the prize. They had
scarcely gone three miles when the
horse dropped dead In. the road. =
Seeing the farmer q few days later,
they approached him With, What
kind Of a horse was that you sold US
the other day?"
"a good all around horse. sirs.".
Yes, he was! He dropped down
dead before we got three miles from
home"
The farmer listened in open
a~stonishment. and then az.
claimed: Upon my word Of honor,
gentlemen, he never done that way for
me-"
Efficiency was the topic that was
The evening times. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1906-1914, 1914-03-17
MORE PEOPLE.

y nat NortI, Dakota needs, needs
more people. The state needs other
things than people, of coWrsc. hut if
We can get the people. and people OF
ne right kind, We will get the other
things. Without the people we can
not get them. aud without the people
we could not use Them if we had them.
With plenty OF the right kind of peo-
pie in the state We would be partic-
,l.at we need.
The people whom we need are not
men of wealth. with lots of money ~
.HyeSt. Money Will come when we
They are not artisans. though of
tllrse there is room for Il limited mum
her right noW in SOME communities.
ut with enlarged local markets for
t-cir products the artisans will ONE
o.. at least. they cun be secured With
comparatively little effort. our need
o. not for hired laborers. though at
me the supply Of labor is sadly in
adequate.
The state needs more real farmers
on its farms. 1t needs thousands of
them. n IL can supply thousands of
them with good homes and good sin
comes. We need men who know how
10 farm. or who have the will and the
intelligence to learn and the industry
90 apply that knowledge. We need
men who will go onto a quarter sec
ton of land and make a home on it,
not men who will try to turn several
sections into bonanza ranches.
The men who come need not have
much money. They should have ONE
But the amount of money that a man
brings into the. state is a minor mat
TOR. The important thing is that he
- the right sort Of man. If he is not,
his pockets may be bullying with mon
cy. and he will lose it all, and event
'lally go away disguised. II he is the
right sort he may come with empty
hands. and he will soon be comfortab-
is off. .... -..
The. immigration work of the rail.
roads. and the efforts of the CONNER
cial clubs and other organizations OF
me state should be directed first of all
IL the attraction of immigration OF
his sort. of men who want to make
GOOD homes for their families. and
VIC have industry and intelligence
:. ruortant Mnrk before us.
The evening times. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1906-1914, 1914-03-17

know a I'M who wants some one
this minute. You could be of great
help to her, for she is a diplomats
wife and not strong. You are gentle
and Very tactful. I a vouch for
you there"
How" aswed Calista. She was sit
ting up and her eyes were bright
with new hope.
Mrs. West laughed softly. "From
my W past experience with you,'
she said, you had the power several
times to slap my face, %figuratively
speaking. But you never did it, and
recognized in you that quality Of a
true lady-generosity."
The deep voice ceased, but Calista
could make no answer. She was TOD
deeply moved. She could only wonder.
The evening times. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1906-1914, 1914-03-17

ing to an end right away. But the ending of the world has been proph-
|eaed sc frequently. without anything coming Of it, that wen the fanatics
are a bit skephcal
,,o There were Sol strong believers. though; when l wa a youngst ter
Dot fifty years aRo a new religious sect had 1t Ill figured ut that the
World as coming to an end on a certain day: They were strong in faith.
II nt IN reason, they went about. preparing for he Judgment, Day, in
utter trust that they infected a To- of other people with a feeling that
maybe they were right. 1 heard my folks talking the thing overv erys Sc
riouay,, and l fully believed that something extraordinary was to happen,
though what it would be wasn't very clear in my childish mind.
II guess people werem ores simple minded then than they are now. Any
way, heard my parents discussing this neghbor and that neighbor. Some
of tn believers gave away all their possessions. Most of thu women were
sewing o. ascension robes. | think they expected to 2 up in a blaze i
church member all his life. A lot Of men quit work-whats the use of
less? r -. .n.
were sadly egected. Their parents were 90 bus getting ready for Judg-
iment Day, and it made n difference whether faces were properly washed
and buttons sewed o n or not. :: -
The great day arrived in midsummer, az I remember. It was fear:
fully hot. 1 went outdoors early in the morning to see what the end Of
the world would look like. Everything looked about a usual, except that
one of the neiehbormg families had decided to foreatal some of the 9TH
ers and get as near to heaven asp possible before the grand climax. -
small children, assembled 0 n the kitchen roc and dreMedi in their *ascenss
sion robes. They looked quite snowy. The children yer crying because
they'd had 9Gbreakfast but the father We praying IN a loud voice and
the women were singing. ....: r.
The father. prayed himself into q frenzy, and when a. great cloud
Idarkened the SKY and a clap Of thunder announced q coming thunder
storm, he deDeaed that the moment had cone Standing on the edge Of
the root and1aapptns his arms. he yelled: Here I come, Lord" and
81 think he expected to fly straight up, but instead he fell off the roof
"The next day I heard his wife scohng him for wasting all that per-
fectly good rain water. -. ..@*".
Say it was awful what bad tempers everybody had after. the judy.
Day had been postponed indefnnely!" 80.
The evening times. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1906-1914, 1914-03-17

er side Of the ocean to Mr.. Bryce's
speeches.
Still, it would not be amiss for our
ambassadors to remember that our
senate is a very sensitive and critical
body, and that 1t is given to viewing
with alarm the speeches made by rep
re%sentatives OF our government
abroad. Doubtless the fact that the
senate has something to do with our
foreign relations may account for this
in a measure. The senator's feel, I'M
doubtedly, that they would not be do
ing their full duty by the country if
they were not to subject every utter
ance of our foreign representatives to
microscopic inspection. Hence it
might be wise for olr ministers and
AMBASSADORS before making speeches
TO cable their tcXt to the senate for
examination, and also to send COM
plete plans and specifications of all
the Jokes that they intend to spring.
joke is really the most dangerous
part of the speech.
The evening times. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1906-1914, 1914-03-17
WARD CO..
w. b. Mclaughlin of Kenmare Jour-
nal, President of Association.

Minot, N. D., March 17.-Fourteen-
representatives of Ward. county print
shops met at the Minot association of
Commerce rooms Saturday night and
formed an organization, which will
be named at the next meeting of
Ward county newspaper men and
publishers to be held here the first
Friday in April.
w. b. Mclaughlin of the Kenmare
Journal, was elected president, and
he will be assisted by the following
officials: Dave Larin, Ryder Journal,
first vice president; Geo. Tout, Ken
The evening times. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1906-1914, 1914-03-17

mare News. second vice president: F.
A. Parrett. Donnybrook Courier, sec
rotary and treasurer. The executive
committee will consist Of w. E. Krick.
Berthold Tribune, Geo. Tour, Ken.
mare News. D. R. Greene, Sawyer
Telegraph, N. J. Pavlik, Carpo Free
Press, and c. A. johnson, Minot Re-
porter.
The evening times. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1906-1914, 1914-03-17
NEW M1Nor CANDIDATE.

Minot. N. D., March IA petition
is being circulated for c. H. Rudd Of
the Bovey Shute Lumber Company.
for president of the Minot board Of
city commissioners. With Mr.. Rudd's
entry into the ace this makes two
active candidates as G.. S. Wooledge
Is also a candidate.
The evening times. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1906-1914, 1914-03-17
X WELL PAID.
Griggs County Property Owners Are
Prompt in Making Payment.

Cooperstown. N. D., March IT.
The big rush during February to pay
taxes was higher than ever this year
and the moun of money taken in
during hat month was a record
breaker, running we'll over 500. 600.
The previous record was some $685.
900, made years ago, when Iver I'd
gard was treasurer. The splendid
manner in which taxes have beer
paid this year speaks we'll for the
prosperity of Griggs county.
The evening times. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1906-1914, 1914-03-17
A school teacher complained to IL

A school teacher complained to the
principal the other day that one Of
the big boys was flirting outrageously
once a day. The principal spoke Sc
verely to the class and ended by say
ing. that out Of consideration for the
feelings Of the culprit he would not
name him in public. At the. close of
the session, however, he was to come
to the principals Office for an inteS.
view.
Yes. you guessed it. All the boys in
the class showed. up.
The evening times. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1906-1914, 1914-03-17
. . Z
POINTED

, = . . r. Il = Il IL \ 4 Il y Il u ~ i 4 Il y
What the phonograph says goes.
Does man eve fot his wife's bills
without kicking?
1t is something else than true love
il the girl retains her appetite.
Turkeys are innocent birds: almost
any woman can stuff them.
Whoever heard of an actress seek
ing Il divorce without publicity?
What is bred IN the bone shows up
III the soup.
Occasionally 8. mar wins a fight be-
cause he hasn't h nerve to run away,
A wonan'S idea Of a happy demise
to be crushed TO death in a shop
ping crowd.
AS q matter of fact, life is a good
deal like p~atronizing a cheap restau-
rant. The things You really want do
not show up on the bill of fare,
The evening times. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1906-1914, 1914-03-17

being discussed at a gabfest in a
Washington club the other night,
When Congressman John G. Rother-
mel OF Reading was reminded of the
declaration of an esteemed party
named James.
The aforesaid James attended a cir
Gus some time since, where one of the
big features of the show was a beau
ttful lion tanner. Entering the ring,
followed by the lion, the air charm
er placed a lump of sugar between
her pretty lips. which the lion took
from her with his teeth. Instantly
James sat upright and began to take
notice.
Great stunt. all right" he loudly
shouted to the performer "but l can
do it, too"
of course" scornfully replied the
girl, who didn't appreciate having her
act minimized. but do you really
think you cam"
Most a%ssuredly," was the prompt
rejoinder Of James," just as we'll as
the lion"
Harry understand Gertrude Cad
alotte married a man who made a big
fortune by a lucky speculation in
soap.
Grace-Yes: and he disgraced her
W1iii tHSy "CIS Ol lISlF uOuSyIlOOil.
Harry-How did he do it?
Grace-Gertrude wanted the other
passengers to think an ocean voyage
was an old story to them, when her
husband, the first crack out of the
box, pointed to a ROY of life preserv.
ers and asked the captain what was
the idea Of all the extra tires.
At breakfast restless little Tommy
began to play with the cruet stand.
His father told him not to do SO.
Tommy persisted and at last upset it
and spilled the pepper on the table,
cloth.
Now, Tommy" said his father,
you were disobedient and upset the
pepper caster, and I really ought to
make the punishment fit the crime by
putting some of the pepper on your
tongue."
Tommy looked up in a flash and
said:
Should I be punished the same
way, dad, if I upset the sugar bowl?"
-
The evening times. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1906-1914, 1914-03-17
IF We Stopped Posing for a Day
.(By E. X. Wooley.)
Copyright. 1914. ty E. K. Wooley.)

ZEE the world is coming to an end
again this year." laughed the plump
matron. =
eff I believed it." remarked the
next door neighbour. I'D go right
down town and buy all the pretty
clothes I want but can't afford. I'd
make one grand splurge. you bet!"
And l." said the plump M
would eat all l want Of everything
I like. People would probably show
their real selves in a hurry If they
really thought the world was com.
The evening times. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1906-1914, 1914-03-17


Who used to play with Anse
and bat the ozone full of holes?
Who quit the job Of catching flies
to take to saving souls? Who
clouts Beelzebub these days and
clouts him just as hard as once
he pounded Keefe and Rad
around the baseball yard? Who
called Of old II got it. Steve"
Good eye" and Lead away"
but now is wont to coach 'em
thus. "Amen" and LET us pray?
Who cussed His Jumps in style
that sure would shock the Ladies'
Aid and ven now inclines to
words by Webster un-O. K.'d2
And ev'ry time the spirit moves
to pass around the hat, who gets
10000 bones or so? Bill Sunday
at the bat.
The evening times. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1906-1914, 1914-03-17

Turkeys are innocent birds: almost
any woman a stuff them.
The evening times. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1906-1914, 1914-03-17

1t is something else than true love
il the girl retains her appetite.
The evening times. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1906-1914, 1914-03-17

being discussed at a gabfest in a
Washington club the other night,
when Congressman John Ct. Rother-
mel of Reading was reminded of the
declaration of an esteemed party
The evening times. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1906-1914, 1914-03-17

Whoever heard of an actress seek
ing Il divorce without publicity?
The evening times. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1906-1914, 1914-03-17

Does man ever fot his wife's bill
without kicking?
The evening times. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1906-1914, 1914-03-17

What the phonograph says goes.
The evening times. [volume] (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1906-1914, 1914-03-17

Great stunt. all right" he loudly
shouted to the performer, ("but l can