Rock Island Argus., 1914-12-04
eruner Knocks EN- Out of Seats.

sruner Knocks EN- Out of Seats.
a. NJ. Bruner, Rock Island, the in
dustrlal specialist, in attendance at
a Y. NJ. c. A. event in EdwardsvilIe.
Ill, gave an address which called forth
from a reporter of the Iptelligencer
tae following characteristic descrip-
ton: In introducing Mr., Bruner, the
| toastmaster stated that he (Mr. Bru-
ner) had sometimes been referred to
as a live wire, and sometimes as a
! cyclone. Mr.. Bruner proceeded speed
| lily to justify both assertions, and then
| to make them seen insufficient. He
| got under way about like a passenger
| locomotive sanding the track a bit
| and easing the steam into the cylin-
! ders with a gradually increasing pull,
until the exhaust was chopping like
the delayed Continental Limited with
orders to make up time. There may
be some people in this world who can
talk faster than Mr.. Bruner, but, if so,
their fame has never extended this far.
He had fifteen thousand word mes
sage to deliver in thirteen minutes
and thirty-five seconds, and he crossed
the line with seven seconds to spare.
When he had the thread of his dis
course we'll in hand he threw verbal
lassoes around the necks and shoul-
ders of his hearers, rolled them over
the floor, and tied them in an inert,
unresisting mass. There were no vol
leys in lis cannonading; a dozen Cat
lings would have sounded like occa-
sional firecrackerS compared with the
smooth and unbroken purr of the
words, as he poured them over the
audience. Story, jest. pathetic remin-
iscence, actual experience, prophecy
and parable cascaded from him like
an untrammeled Niagara. No one ap-
pIauded during his speech-there was
no opportunity, for, after every point
he was a mile upon his way before |
palm could have struck upon palm.
But it must not be inferred that any |
of his speech was lost; every word |
was clear and was needed. The thing |
to be wondered at is that, without los
ing in effectiveness, Mr.. Bruner was
able to talk at such a tremendous gait
His subject, by the way, was The
Practical Man"
THE republican national congress
sional committee has just S17 on hand.
There is likely to be some heavy
coughing spells this winter in the
ranks OF the faithful.
THIS is Tim Collins latest: You'll
observe that every banjo player, when
he appears before an audience, has
two instruments. The extra one is
for use in the event that the strings
OF the other break. Up in Wisconsin
an old Irishman has broken into the
game. He booked a banjo
artist at his theatre. When tho artist
finished his act the Irish manager
slapped a fine ON him. The artist de
manded an explanation. The manager
charged that he had cheated the audi
ence when he failed to play on both
Of his instruments"
THAT murder will out is tragically
Illustrated in Chicago case. Twenty
years ago a man forged another's name .
10 check in New York. He jumped ,
his bond. settled in Chicago, married !
and prospered and turned philanthro-
pist Yesterday he was arrested in -.
his beautifully appointed Offices in one :
of the big buildings in the loop
OF interest TO street car conduc- 9
-ors: Fashion has decreed that wo- ,
mems skirts are TO be wider next :
spring. !
This Is Plenty.
Now do you see what is following I
In Russia? The car is g
obliged TO come to America TO buy i
anks. L.F. o
WITH the football season ended, n
hey have begun passing the pills in I
major baseball circles First dream
S that Walter Johnson's salary next n
eason with the Federals Is to Se $780, 5
100. I'M. G. q