The Ocala evening star. [volume] (Ocala, Fla.) 1895-1943, 1914-07-13
MINUTES IN
MANHATTA
Strenuous Times for the Citizens Of
that Large and Festive City

New York, July 13.-When in
Rome do as the Romans do. When
in New York throw bombs. That
IS the only way to keep even with
.the game. A New Yorker must get
acclimated to bombs and bomb throw
ing bomb factories and premature
explosions. You may not believe this
because you don't live in New York,
but let me tell you right here that
the center of the bomb zone here
abouts is the marble and gilt police
headquarters, home of a thousand
anti-bomb enthusiasts, at Center AMI
Broome streets, and there is no pal
ace so exalted nor a home so hum
BILE that the bomb like the use
less christmas gift is unknown.
/ live in an elevator apartment
much better than 1 can afford on
Washington Heights and | congrat-
ulated myself that the altitude was
too great for bombs. But | was self
deluded.
New York apartment houses are,
or should be, celebrated for the
most Iuxuries and the most atrocious
crudities of civilization on the face
Of the twentieth century earth.
One of the most highly amusing
institutions of apartment houses is
the purchase of ice. Ice is like
chewing gum and almond chocolate
bars in Manhattan, dispensed every
where. Some one has spoken of an
lice trust" j could never find this
benifcient institution. If it is still
struggling along it has my moral sup
port. But all the ice | could ever
locate was in the possession of GER
tain Calabrians and Sici1ians with
wide grins and large earrings, who
dwell in cellars and are uniformly
named joe?
| The "Joes" had a monopoly of our
apartment. There was sharp rival
| ry between them, but it never took
the form of ice cutting. There would
come a heavy buzz at the dumb
waiter
This is the ice man. Any ict
today?"
Yes, Joe, ten cent piece"
A few minutes later another buzz
at the dumb waiter and up it wou1t
come, pitiful little chunck wiggl
ing back and forth on the creakin;
Underwater and so obviously on it
: last legs that one thrust it hastil
into the refrigerator for fear it NIGH
die in transit '.Ten cent piece
meant that amount which tenth o
dollar would buy at the curren
retail price for ice. So the theory
one stopped to reason. Few did that
One shouted:
Give me decent piece this tim
Joe, that last was terrible"
Then would come up a fairly re
spectacle piece with profuse Neapoli
tan apologies but the next day ic
would be back to its old basis.
Then something dreadful happen
ed. Our superintendent -janitor i
now obsolete-went about denounc
ing the "Joes' as thieves and all tn
tenants were SC wrought up tina
they decided to take ice from .'M1
John thus the regular style of tn
New York apartment house superin
Itendent. The tJoes" were barre
from the basement where they hat
fourished for 81 weeks in the yea
among the feet of the dumb-Waiters
and .sMr. john started his service o
ice, giving perhaps slightly fatte
: chunks than did the Calabrians, bu
generosity is characteristic of neV
mercantile enterprises.
"Bang!"
Our dreams of being out of tn
New York bomb zone were shatteI
ed. Considerable smoke was issu
ing from the basement and scoutin
= parties told US that Mr. Johns de
D partment of ice was wrecked. "
= all told the police it was an outrag
. of course, and there was an 'sinyes
o tigation''
: "Bang!"
This time in the middle of tn
. night. Many of the more tempers
: mental tenants trooped to the fire es
. capes in pajamas and what nots
. Windows in the basement positive
. ly broken and by an Italian boml
= One woman whispered to me wit
. tears in her eyes she considered it g
. much disgrace as to be plague
3 with that widely disseminated huma
:. companion of the night season
which one names but frequently pu
sues.
Just al nreSent we are ava il n