Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1914-02-05


ad Of They had wandered along for
a distance OF Is feet end three or four
inches, and the deacon was saying 10
himself that he who controlled his
own temper Sas greater than the Jaw
bone OF an ass. when there was
third rush. This time II was straight
ahead and the full length OF the gar
den and as the plowman sought TO
keen fast hold he was flung this way
and that. and finally found himself
tangled up with an old strawberry
bed
Now by the horn spoon OF the
horned jackass, but this Is too much
too much!" he shouted as he scram-
bled UP and found club.
'Ts II thunder after all, deacon?'
sweetly inquired the widow. as she
appeared in the kitchen door.
Yes, it's thunder and lightning,
too" he almos: shouted, as he moist
ened his hands TO get grip on the
club
what is lt--what are you going
to do?"
wanted all his breath for what was
about to happen. He gripped the club
and made for the oxen, and for ten
minutes there was circus In town
with free admission. He pounded and
swatted and batted, and as the club
rose and fell he brought out reserve
stock of the English language to take
the cake over anything Farmer John
son had ever thought of
Deacon Shortwell. wouldn't a.
believed It, not II the minister had
told me 80 himself.
81 don't care durn whether you
would or mott" he hoarsely replied.
"Oh, you don't Ell? Well, you've
let the cat out OF the bag at last
Deacon, you are cruel-hearted man.
and you swear like a pirate. | can
never. never marry such a man."
Nobody has asked you to. Durn
their hides, but I'd like to murder
'em!"
More cruelty! More cussing!
thought there might be something
hidden under that soft, sleek way of
YOURS Oxen amt exactly women, and
wives amt exactly oxen, but a man
who win cuss and pound his oxen will
naturally"
"Mebhe you'd like to try EN- your
self" interrupted the deacon, as a
brilliant thought came to him.
II would have never driven oxen
in my life, but know l can do bet
tern you. Gimme the CAD Now,
then, haw Puck--gee Bright See
there! As soon as they find out that
nobody is going to break their ribs
or cuss them blind they are as docile
as cats. You hold the pillow and I'll
drive"
Five minutes later the furrow had
been extended four feet more, and the
piow point was getting ready to rip
up the soil in the good old way when
the oxen fourished their tails and
bolted The deacon went whirling at
the first twist of the pillow, but the
widow was game, and she raced along
with the boilers and put the whip
over their noses She might possibly
have stopped them before they got
over the county line but for an accf-
dent Oxen and woman struck and
overturned a beehive in their mad
career, and the 10000 bees loafing
around came up to the scratch in the
promptest and most cheerful manner.
The deacon witnessed the beginning
Of the scrap and even waited until
stray bee had lifted his heels off the
ground for humanity's sake, but then
he fed and II was two days later
that he knew that the widow had 81
Jumps on her body and was doing as
well as could be expected, and that
the oxen had been heard OF 40 miles
away and still on the run
Deacon" began the widow, as he
made his appearance in response to
her message, 81 believe you cussed
them oxen the other. day"
II guess I did" he rather sheep
ishly replied
But it was for yourself, deacon. I
now wish you TO cuss 'em for me.
You also dubbed 'em until you Was
tired out. Can't you club 'em some
more?"
"And you ain't-ain't mad at me?''
he asked, as a look of relief came to-
his face.
La no-not mite.
"And / amt cruel-hearted nor
hypocrte and a pirate?"
mo, deacon. On the contrary, yon
are one Of the best men on earth, or
will be after you have bought. them
oxen and peeled their pesky hides
off"
And about-about-y' stammered
the deacon
About our getting married? Wei,
Samuel you can fix the date to suit
yourself, and l will be there"
Copyright, 1913 by the Mcclure News
paper SyndicateD
Political Opinions Never Change.
hTg.f L.. Il