davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-06-23
American Catacombs and Mummies.

American Catacombs and MummieS.
Recent publicity has been given to
the wonders of the cliff-villages of the
ella canyon in New Mexico, where
the lofty pumice or tufa walls of the
box canyon are honeycombed with the
excavated dwellings of a nation OF
dwarfs, whose mummies here and
there found, preserved by the stone
dust for centuries, are clad in woven
clothes, and ornamented with gay
feathers at neck and waist
The remains of an adult man of this
people measured only % inches in
height, and the doors and windows OF
their homes in the rock are hardly pas
sable by a half-grown girl. Like the
dwarf temples of Yucatan-of which
LIE Plongeon wrote so entertain
ingly-hovel, mansion, fortress, and
temple, seem like toys made with in
finite pains for the children of a remote
past; indeed, an antiquity fixed by the
best authorities at least as far back
as 5000 years educational Maya
zine.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-06-23
Trying to Look Margaret Ansern the Big Scene

the Marble Stairway, 'Ah, here comes
She would enter trippingly, wearing
5000 worth Of spangled Raiment,
whereupon the Vast Audience would
stand up and Cheer
Whilst enjoying this Trance she
wore a Yellow Kimono and had her
Meals sent to the Room.
Father saw that he was Hooked, so
he loaded her into a Parlor Car and
took her up to a School of Dramatic
Art to have her searched for Talent.
The Head Crimp of this refined
Shake-Down watched her do the Scene
in which Ophelia goes Dotty and picks
the imaginary Hollyhocks, and when
it was all over and Shakespeare had
been reduced to Pulp, he slapped
old Ready Money on the Back and
told him his Daughter was a Phenom.
With a couple of hundred Lessons
in Correct Breathing, and the Vocal
Chords loosened up with a Glove
Stretcher, and row Of Scallops put on
the Technique, Mary Anderson would
be right back in our midst
So Lila got ready to fill the Vacancy
caused by the Retirement of Ellen
Terry, while Papa went back to the
little Office in one corner of the Ware
House and began to sign Checks,
1t took many an Egg to have Lila
properly Conservatoried.
At last she came home With Di-
nloma showing that she was an Ac-
Iress.
After that she merely needed Play
and a Company and a lot of Scenery
and a Manager and a Theater and the
soft old Public buying of the Scalpers
in order to realize her modest Ambi-
ton to become a Real Star.
She took her Diploma and the Local
Press Notices up to New York to see
what she could get on them, and found
10000 other incipient Modjeskas hit
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-06-23
Womanly Gossip.

Among many who visited Mrs. Stew
enson for her sons sake came Mr..
Barrie, when she was home from
Samoa one winter. He was anxious
for her to meet his mother, and Mrs.
Stevenson regretted she had not taken
the journey to Thrums Mrs. Steven
son was much amused at the way in
which he tried TO tempt her to fird
time to go. If Mrs. Barrie in her 10y
atty to her son bore Robert Louis
Stevenson a grudge, why, Mrs. Steven
son asked, would she care to see her?
She would like" answered Mr. Bar
RE, ito tell you how l came through
the whooping cough, and ask you if
your son has any Sregs from the
measles
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-06-23
Morse TO Come

The regular trombone player Of a
Scottish orchestra was laid up with a
cold, and the conductor reluctantly &C
copied the services of a brass band
amateur. He was a little doubtful,
however, as to the suitability of his
substitute.
After the first performance the new
player asked the conductor how he
had done.
The conductor replied that he had
done pretty fairly, but that perhaps
he would do better next night
The newcomer, cycling him grateful
ly, answered:
Man. We see, the music is a. strange
tae me the NIGHT, and I'm no. jest shair
OF yet. but you wait tae the morn's
NIGHT. an yell no hear ane O. thae
fddles at a."
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-06-23
Confidential.

The dull routine of the day in the
bank was one day lightened by the
receipt of the following communica-
ton:
Dear Bank: What interust would
you give on Deposit of Is dollers?
What interust per annium and also
(confidenshiaD could my Husband
draw it out without my signachure an
is it the Law and that l would have to
have his Permission to Deposit it
thare in your Bank. Please to ANGER
back an be sure to say what interust
per annium an if he can draw it out
Yours with respeck."
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-06-23
Shows How carelessness Costs.

In big store the general manager
recently instituted a plan tending to
eliminate poor handwriting among the
company's employees. When errors or
delays occur in getting out orders
through inability to read the order
slips he summons all clerks who have
been careless in that respect to the
assembly room at the close of the day.
There all incorrectly and poorly writ
ten checks are flashed by a stereop-
ticon upon a large screen, and in each
instance the employees are told how
much the carelessness has cost the
store and what steps had been neces-
sary to rectify the trouble. AS all the
checks are numbered each clerk knows
when his careless work is being made
the subject of the illustrated criticism,
and as a result few examples of care
lessness and poor writing now are in
evidence and the delivery and filing
of orders have been greatly facilitated.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-06-23
SPARK THAT HAD A SHORT
CIRCUIT.

One Evening at a converted Rink
known as the Grand Opera House, a
flock of intrepid Amateurs put on a
War Drama.
Lila principal Child of the Egg and
Poultry King, played a Daughter of
the Southland, and her Hair shaken
out and Lamp Black on her Eye-Wink-
ers, SO as to look like Maxine.
All Of her Relations and the other
Members of the Pocahontas Bridge
Whist and Pleasure Club were In
Front, and they gave her a Hand every
time she stepped out from behind a
Tree.
She scored what is known in the ID
sen Cult as a Knockout
At II P. NJ. she was up on a lone
some Eminence, right between Sara
Bernhard and Julia Marlowe, waiting
for Telegram from c. F. to come on
and tackle the Role that was too
Heavy for Maude Adams.
The proud Parents awoke next
Morning to discover that Lady Mac
beth was boarding with them
When she moved from one Room to
another, the Portieres had to be spread
the entire length of the Pole, so as to
make Room for her Head
A local Haberdasher, who had been
plotting to surround her with a new
Bungalow and lot of Mission Furni-
ture, went to call as per Usual and
found her away Up Stage, trying to
look like Margaret Angelin in the Big
Scene.
She was too busy to Hold Hands,
for she was mapping out a Career
which terminated with an Electric
Sign on Broadway and the Street
TANNED with uptown Limousines.
So the Gents Furnisher moved
down the Street to Brick House, the
unmarried Inmates of which would
begin burning Greek Fire and send
ing up Balloons every time Live One
Slammed the Front Gate.
Lila had the Bacillus Theatricus
gnawing away in every part of her
System.
She could see the magnificent Play
House crowded from Pit to Dome, just
as the Producing Manager sees it
every August when the Pipe is draw
ing freely.
She could hear the Leading Man in
the Dress Suit say, as he pointed UP
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-06-23
PRIVATE JONES WAS LATE
bilites Are That CongratuIatory
Visit Was Postponed.

Corporal Jenkins married ION the
strength" and in due course his wife
presented him with a son and heir.
His pals all flocked around to tender
their congratulations and incidental
ly taste Bills bitter beer.
Private Jones was on his way when
he met Sergeant Brown returning.
Where are you off to-" asked the
latter.
'Oh, I'm going around to see Bill
and wish him luck with that young
ster of his" was the answer
Then you're too late" said the
sergeant solemnly.
"Wot!" exclaimed Private Jones'
Surely it hasn't gone and died?"
mo, the youngsters all right, but
the barrel is Quit" was the grim re-
sponse.-London Tit-Bits.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-06-23
Discusses Intricate Questions

Few citizens have even heard Of the
American Mathematical society, to say
nothing of the fact that it's delvings
in the science of figures have been Of
value to European savants. And yet
the society has been in existence for
many years, has a membership of ITO,
including 66 life members, publishes
essays and textbooks on mathematics
and has library of 1902 volumes.
The society discusses with ease
such complex problems as: The re-
stricted problem of three bodies, the
fourth dimension, the Fredholm deter
minant, covariant curves of the plane,
rational quintic and cyclic systems of
osculating circles of curves on a sur
face. The last subject does not refer
70 kiSsingi
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-06-23
Where He Came In.

Grace was a country girl, whose
parents sent here to the city to at
tend college. When the holidays
came around and she came home, her
mother gave reception in her honor.
Some of the girl friends asked
Grace to show them her new gowns.
Obligingly she brought out several
modish gowns, and, holding up a par
ticularly pretty one of silk. she said:
Isn't this one perfectly beautiful?
And, just think, it came from a poor,
little insignificant worm!"
Her Woodworking father was seated
near, watching the performance, and
he replied:
yes, darn it, and I'm that worm!"
-Lippincotts
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-06-23
MOST CRUEL OF RELIGIONS
That of the Ancient Mexicans Surely
the Most Infamous Recorded
in History.

The temples were called teocalli or
Gods house." and rivaled in size as
they resembled in form the temples of
ancient Babylon. They were pyramids
on square or oblong base, rising in
| successive terraces to small summit
platform. The great teocalli of HUT
Zilopochtli in the City of Mexico stood
In an immense square, whence radl-
ated the four principal thoroughfares,
its courtyard being inclosed by
square, of which the stone wall, called
the coatepantli or serpent wall from
It's sculptured serpents, measured
| nearly a quarter of a mile on each
side. In the center, the oblong pyra-
mid of rubble cased with hewn stone
and cemented, 375x300 feet at the
base, and rising steeply in five terraces
to the height of sc feet, showed con-
spicuously to the city the long pro-
cesstOn of priests and victims wind
ing along the terraces and up to cor
ner flights Of steps On the paved plat
form were the three-story tower tenn
pies on whose ground floor stood the
stone images and affairs, and before
that of the war god the green stone
of sacrifice, bumped so as to bend the
| body of the victim that the priest
might more easily slash open the
breast with his obsidian knife, tear
out the heart and hold it up before
the god, while the captor and his
| friends were waiting below for the
carcass to be tumbled down the steps
for them to carry home to be cooked
! for the feast of victory. Before the
! shrines reeking with the stencil OF
| slaughter, the eternal fires were kept
burning, and on the platform stood the
| huge drum, covered with snakes skins,
whose fearful sound was heard for
miles. From the terrace could be seen
seventy or more temples within the
| Enclosure, with their images and blaz-
| ing fires, and the tzompantli or skull
place." where the skulls of victims by
| tens of thousands were skewered on
cross-sticks or built into towers.
| There also might be seen the fiat cir
cular temalacatl or "spindle-stone,
where captives armed with wooden
weapons were allowed the mockery OF
gladiatorial fight against well-armed
champions.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-06-23
Business Is on Its Way Out Again.

Speaking of the business outlook
the Manufacturers Record says that
a group of New York men had gath
cred in a rather mournful spirit, and
as they discussed the business out
look, which seemed to them to grow
darker and darker, one wit in the
party, turning to a staid, much per-
turbed financier, said:
Mr.. Blank, can you tell me how far
a dog can run into the woods?"
Mr. Blank, somewhat irritated at
such. trivial remark at a time of
serious discussion, rather tartly re-
piled that he supposed dog could
run into the woods just as far as he
wanted to-"
NO" said the questioner, when he
has run halfway into the woods he is
then running out of the woods"
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-06-23

Gang narrowly escaped being hit in
the Head with a tin Makeup Box,
hurled from the rear of the Observa
ton Car
Next day she had a strip of Red
Carpet spread for the Haberdasher
and was learning to Cook in Paper
Bags.
Whenever she hears of a Good Show
coming to Town, she invites all of her
Friends to come out to the Bungalow
and Play Rhum on the Mission Fur
niture
MORAL: The True Friend of Hin.
mainly is one who goes to the Home
Talent Benefit for Something and
Kisses all Evening
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-06-23
MortQaced His Grave,

Some remarkable expedients were
resorted to by Burnley football enthu-
siasls in order to raise money to visit
London to witness the English cuE
final. One Burnley man, it is stated
who owned grave in the public Gem
etery, mortgaged his plot" which was
worth eS los, fer e. TO a bookmaker
and expended the money on travelling
and other expenses incidental to the
occasion London Mail.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-06-23

81 hate to leave the old place." re-
marked Adam as he turned from the
Garden of Eden. Leaving isn't the
worst of it," replied Eve. Think of
the trouble you're going to have when
you get to telling of the animals and
rivers in this place to the explorers
and geographical experts over yon-
der. Star.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-06-23
No Doubt.

This militant suffragette movement
In England ought to appeal to the
theatrical managers for material, for
one thing in it"
What is that?'
No one can deny 1t has lots OF
punch "
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-06-23
OF Course Not.

81 found a letter in your coat pocket
that you had not mailed"
as that all you found in my coat?"
THAT is all there was in it,
ooh, no it's not"
"What else I'd like to know"
"a rip under the sleeve, but, of
course, you were not looking for any
thing like that"
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-06-23
TribuIation,

He-Darling, why are you so sad?
She (gulping down a sob)-Oh,
dearest, l was just thinking this will
be our last evening together until
tomorrow night!-Puck.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-06-23
AS to Jones.

Jones puts his watch under his
poIlow nights
Il notice he likes to sleep over
time"
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-06-23
Stationery Talk.

81 like your address, said the pos
tage-stamp to the envelop.
IF it were not for my address
don't suppose you would be stuck on
me-" replied the envelop.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-06-23

Redd-I understand that golf enthu-
siasts in Massachusetts yearly spend
about $500, 900 on the game
Greene-Gee! They must put away
a lot of Scotch.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-06-23
Where the Adane Is True

Gobang-I attended a spiritualistic
seance last night and the spirit of
my father appeared.
Grymes-You should remember that
appearances are deceptive.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-06-23

A young man who imagines that
he has been called to preach the Cos
pei may discover later that few peo-
pie have been called to listen to him.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-06-23
Practically So.

Eddie, what's the matter? Fall?"
mo l tried to hang some pictures
and stood some dictionaries on a Ia
BILE and they slipped from under me-"
Words failed you, l suppose. -
Judge.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-06-23

No woman who believes in the
eternal fitness of things will marry a
man who is SO tall that she cant
reach his hair.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-06-23

Every time we hear of a wedding
we wonder how the girl asked the
man to marry her
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-06-23

Ninety per cent of the farms Of
this country are said to be without
any sheep.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-06-23

No wonder Solomon was the cham
coach him.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-06-23

Many a good fellow has an excel
lent memory for faces and a poor
memory for debts.
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-06-23

Be sure you're wrong before you
back up
The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-06-23

Their fickleness is what make:
some girls interesting.
Daily capital journal. (Salem, Oregon) 1903-1919, 1914-08-07
For Saving Cash Checks from Merchants
Advertising on This Page
KEEP SALEM MONEY IN SALEM
EXPLANATION

A grand prize of FREE Round Trip Tour of the
Panama Pacific Exposition will be awarded to the in
dividual securing the greatest number of votes
HOW TO SECURE THE VOTES
Every person purchasing goods for cash from any
of the firms advertising on this page will receive
cash sales check which may be exchanged at THE
JOURNAL office for votes on the ratio of one (D
vote for each five-cent (05) cash purchase.
All cash sales checks must be deposited in THE
JOURNAL office within ten days from date of pur
chase The advertisements of these merchants will
appear once each week.
Any individual not connected with THE JOURNAL
or any of the firms advertising this page may par
ticipate in this cash purchasing event.
Votes are not transferable.
Full information may be obtained at THE JOUR-
NAL office.
Daily capital journal. (Salem, Oregon) 1903-1919, 1914-08-07
I)eV()E
The Shoe Man

Does a general shoe business,
and sells shoes for every
member of the family, at
prices that will keep you CON-
ing. Give us a trial and be
convinced. You will find us
right in every respect. We
are receiving new goods daily
and will soon have. one Of the
most complete lines Of shoes
in the city. We solicit your
business and appreciate your
trade. Come in and get ac-
quainted, you will be glad
you came. Have you our
Notaseme Hosiery If not
why not give them a trial;
they are sure to please you.
Bryan daily eagle and pilot. [volume] (Bryan, Tex.) 1909-1918, 1914-10-26
ENGLAND CONSENTS
TO COTTON SHIPPING
Foreign Minister Announced Ameri-
can Shipping Would Not Be
lnterfered With.
fBy Annotated Press.l

Washington. Oct. 26.-Sir Edward
Grey. British Minister OF Foreign AZ
fairs. has assured the United States,
through Ambassador Page at London.
that England will not interfere with
American cotton shipments as contra
band OF war" This was announced
yesterday at the State Department.
Ambassador Page also reported that
the British ship Camperdoon. laden
with American cotton and products.
detained at stornoway. Scotland. was
not held because Of her manifest, but
on account Of disagreement between
her owners and the charter party.
This attitude OF the British govern
ment will permit the same movement
OF American cotton to any point. in
cluding Germany. where a market may
be found. Moreover. Sir Edward
Grey's statement is construed in some
quarters as meaning there Is TO be
no interference with any noncontra-
band cargoes from a neutral country
carried in neutral ships even when
consigned directly to belligerenL
The British statement as to cotton
forestalled action by the State De-
parment upon a request made Satur.
day by Senators from Southern States
that the belligerent countries be ask
ed to give assurances that shipments
of cotton from the United States to
neutral or bellIgerent countries would
not be seized or detained.
Cotton never has been listed as
either absolute or conditional contra
band. but some cargoes have been de-
tanned and certain marine Insurance
companies have refused to issue cot
ton policies.
Bryan daily eagle and pilot. [volume] (Bryan, Tex.) 1909-1918, 1914-10-26
JURY DISAGREED IN
CARMAN CASE
Defendant In Murder Case Collapsed
on Hearing Report and Was
Carried From Court Room.

Ninola, X. Y. Oct. 26.--The jury in
the case of Mrs. Florence Conklin Car
man. charged with the murder OF Mrs.
Louise Bailey, failed to reach a yer.
dict after thirteen hours and ten min.
utes of deliberation. The jury, worn
and haggard from lack Of sleep, re-
ported its inability to agree at 1885
a. m. Sunday and was discharged,
Mrs. Carman collapsed upon hear
ing the verdict and was carried from
the court room. Her attorney an
nounced that bail would be furnished
for her release today, should the court
consent, pending new trial
Bryan daily eagle and pilot. [volume] (Bryan, Tex.) 1909-1918, 1914-10-26
GERMANS ARE IN FLIGHT FROM WARSAW
KA|SER'S TROOPS HARD
HIT ON RUSSIAN SOIL

Progress of Germans After Breaking Through
Allies Lines and Crossing User River Is
Overshadowing Question The French
Claim They Have Not Been Able to Proceed
Any Further and that the French Front Is
Holding All Reports Say the Death Loss at
User Was Fearful Germany Is Building
New Type Submarines Germany Lost a
General in Battle-French Brought Down
Five German Aeroplanes Many Prisoners
Are Held by Germany.
Bryan daily eagle and pilot. [volume] (Bryan, Tex.) 1909-1918, 1914-10-26
GOVERNMENT COTTON
GINNING REPORT

The government ginning report Is.
sued today shows cotton ginned totaled
as follows Standard bales, 7.6lO,Gs2;
round bales. 1929: sea island, 3O.O7s.
BY States: Arkansas, S97O3l: FIori.
da, 43,ii3; Georgia, l,36i,O3l; Louis.
lana, 22i,96S; Mississippi. 474.SSO;
North Carolina. SO1.O77; Oklahoma,
45O.657; South Carolina. 69S 1892: Ten.
nessee, 1OS.s7O; Texas. 2,7l2.7l2;
other States, 3i,433. Sea island:
Florida, 1888; Georgia, 1854: South
Carolina. 456.