El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1914-01-30
Local Men Held Up as Butts
of Jokes at Chamber of.
Commerce Dinner.


ne was going TO get his goat" sher-
man said.
sThe Mexican looked, at him a min
ute and said: "Mistah Levi, I amt
gotta no goat; I amt even gotta dogP'
Bob Page made a hit with a joke
on V. r. stiles and Eugene Neff
partners in the Neff-Stiles company.
You know that Vernon Stiles is a
dcasOn in the Episcopal church" Bob
said. He goes to church on Sunday
morning while Mike Neff attends the
bar meetings at the country club. One
Monday mo-~~Cg Stiles said to Neff.
Look here Mike. you ought to cut
out this Country club stuff on Sun
days and Join the church"
Look here Vernon Neff answered;
you belong to this here church al
ready. If I join the church who in
HI is goin' to weigh the coaP2"
Parvin Witte sang when it's Apple
blossom Time in Normandy" and
Mathew Lemeu sang when the Min
strel Show Parades" The Gridiron
quartet also sang a number of good,
old melodies at the close Of the first
part.
Tinker e3reaIzs In"
Just as they were closing their song
number Ed l. Tinker staggered out
of the audience with his evening
clothes rumpled, and his silk hat at
a rakish angle on his head. Mayor
Kelly tried TO stop him at the door
but he came down to the fOOtlights
and said This is a rotten show.
want my money back. There's no
dancing in it."
co on away from here white man
this amt no tango tea" Gene Harris
told him.
Walker told him. you promised to
come here and DO a dance for US and
here you are stewed to the gills. Get
But I want to dance" Tinker
Get busy, white man, get busy"
the GridirOns shouted and Tinker
staggered up onto the stage, threw
his cane and overcoat to the fun
makers and did a splendid eccentric
dance in spite of the limitations Of
the small stage. His drunk stunt
was all in the play and made MT
for the closing of the first part
Mexican Diplomacy.
The best feature in the minstrel
was the one act sketch, Mexican
Long Distance Diplomacy" by
made up as Gen. Victoriano Huerta
and Pancho Villa. 4 full telephone
switchboard was set up on the stage
with 8 telephone connection at each
Tri-State Telephone office, presided
at the switchboard and connected the
two Mexican generals with president
Wilson at Washington, and local cell
ebrifies in III Paso. Gen. Huerta"
called Washington, asked for the pres
ident and asked to be recognized.
Just then Miss Mclean cut the con-
nectiOn with the white house and
''Gen. Villa was given the presidents
number He also asked to be recog-
nized. When refused he called mayor
Kelly in FL PasO and asked him if he
recognized him over the phone. Kelly
did. ct am recognized the genera
shouted in glee- "Huerta" called
POSTMASTER general" J. A Smith and
asked him to send him one American
general. general Delivery" down to
HELM him fight villa" called Tom
Lea and begged him to assist him in
getting major Enrique Kelly to rec
Dgnize him officially" Kelly viii /
DO anything you say" Villa told /
'rHuerta' then called the FL Paso :
custom house and asked Zach Cobb to !
become minister of state, and go to
E0rreon so Huerta could withdraw
the federal army and let Cobb talk
Villas army to death. This was one
OF the screams of the show. Both
auer, Shelton, York, and Payne" at
the same time and ordered ten cars
Of ammunition for their armies. They !
then talked to each other over the I
long distance Villa said; looking
across the stage: Ct see you Victor /
with his sword drawn. AT last I am !
recognized 'Huerta" shouted as he (
IAN from the stage with villa" after /
him. !
Piano and Drums.
Norman Walker and Henderson Van
5urda1 did a piano and drum duet /
between the telephone sketch and the 4
been 'the annual meeting of the
chamber of commerce. but because Of
the length of the program, the stunt
was called off and some of the mem