The Bottineau courant. (Bottineau, Bottineau County, N.D.) 1895-1929, 1914-10-09
An Up to Date
Matrimonial Method
BY OSCAR COX

" 10 = !" ~
Beall.
IF that isn't the most monumental
piece of impudencc l ever heard OF"
Tell me what it is"
"YOu know that red headed. freckled,
loose jointed All Woodbridge"
Yes"
well, he's sent me IA printed circu-
lar stating that he's in the market for
a wife. He says he's up for COMPETE
ton, a prize. Just think Of it, He'll
marry the girl who passes the best ex-
animation in those things that are req
uisite in a wife"
do you mean to say that b" has had
the assurance to do such a thingi"
IL do
HE hasn't sent me one of his circu-
lars. If he did I'd send it right back
to him."
Him! Better wait till you get II
Of EN- He says that only Il few OF
the most desirable young ladies Of the
town Will be invited to compete"
Worse and worse. wonder that
he hasn't died OF cOnceit before this"
"Conceited persons never die Of that
disease: they seem to thrive on It."
"Of course you won't take any no
tice OF his circular"
"Ccrtainly not. but there's one thing
I'd like to know that Is, If any Of
the girls SO demeans herself rs to fail
in with his idea. which one Of them
will get the
"Prizc. Just think Of that fellow
Offering himself as n prize"
"Tll tell you what l have a mind
to do"
"What?"
1--WE a mind to Gil in his questions
just to see what comes Of It,"
Cant you find that out without
pandering to his silly c%onceitI"
"No; he says that no information will
be given any girl who has not been
invited to compete and does not enter
the race"
Race Oh heavens! Don't you know
that the girl who wins will let 1t be
known ever if she submits to the in
dignity for fun or to punish himT'
well I'm going to pretend to be a
candidate, and II l win l shall just tell
him what | him Of him"
That's a good idea. | believe I'll
do so too"
There were a dozen eligible girls in
the town. and six received the circular.
The six who were left out were furi-
GUS. Every one Of them pronounced
Woodbridgc's %impudence Undesirable.
The six who were invited seemed to
have various opinions Of Woodbridge's
act. Some considered 1t objectionable.
some pronounced it very funny. and
one or W. girls with advanced views
considered it a very practical way Of
getting Il wife. They said they had q
mind to select husbands in the same
way.
One morning Mr.. Woodbridge was
surprised at receiving through the mail
a note inclosing a list Of printed ques
tons filled in in writing. The note
said that the sender considered his
competitive examination for a wife
'perfectly brutal" but that under.
meath it all was a basis Of ommon
sense.
I'll cOwIide those fellows" remark.
ed Mr. Woodbridge. red as Il beet. IL
didn't suppose when they threatened
to pcrpctrate that joke on me that they
would have the hardihood to dc it."
The next morning Woodbridge re-
'elVeh another set Of examination pa
iers and II set In the afternoon. Each
girl who responded had an especial ex.
cuse for doing SO.
This is getting interesting" rrmark-
ed Woodbridge to himself. What ex-
cellent reason these girls have for com.
peting. After all. what's wrong I'm the
.dea! Marri" ges are made in ali sorts
Of ways. Why not by competitive ex-
animation! In this age Of marriages.
experimental marriages. in which both
husband and wife are to be boss. mar.
riages without ceremony and marriage
Till the contracting parties are tired of
each other. why not 60 a step further
and have marriages on examination?"
In the last set OF examination Da-
pers Mr.. Woodbridge received all the
questions were scratched and new ones
inserted. The new ones were so word.
Ell rs to constitute a virtual examina.
ton of the man. The lady inclosed
the paper in II note stating that she
considered the plan admirable. but the
questions were all wrong II Mr..
Woodbridge considered his examina.
ton satisfactory she would be happy
to marry him at once She had a brand
new idea of the marriage
The couple were to be photographed
standing beside each other holding
hands. She objected to anything being
said on the occasion since matrimonial
promises. all the world knew. did not
mean anything.
Woodbridge burst into q laugh at
this form Of marriage. He wrote q
reply to each one Of the young ladies'
who had sent in papers stating that
there had been a reaction toward mod
esty in him. He would do a bit OF
counting with the winner. and II she
accepted him the result Of the exami-
nation would be known by the an