davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1914-03-13
Too Good.

ITO say that honesty is the best pol
icy--to say in other words, that the
more honest you are the richer you
will become--that is silly and self
evident lie"
The speaker, Harvey Woodruff, the
wellknown G. A. X. historian of Hous'
ton. had been discussing the honesty
of George Washington. He continued
TO be virtuous means to be poor
and wretched. Take the case OF Auntie
Martha Washington Clay,
"Auntie Martha visited the office Of
a Nola Chucky lawyer and said
"'Ah wants n divorce from nah hus
band Cal
why, auntie, what has Cal beer
doing?
He's done got religion, sab, an al
hain't tasted chicken 70 free months
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1914-03-13
No Joke.

At the Chicago Athletic club a
game had been put In on cynical
old bachelor. The man had waited
from eight TO ten in the park on q
snowy evening In obedience to a
pale pink, violetscented note that his
friends had faxed in order to see II
he was really as confirmed q woman
hater as he claimed.
Turning up at the club for a night
cap the duped and frozen bachelor
was very sullen and sulky when his
friends derided him. He was no fun
whatever In the fake note.
George AIDE, noticing his black and
lowering looks. gave loud laugh and
said
What a skiDnint you must be!
Won't even laugh at joke, oh, If III
at your own expense
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1914-03-13
uo,iness a Qualification.

Some bygone housewives appear to
have regarded ugliness as quality
to be desired In their servants. When
Eliza Coke, daughter OF Coke OF Nor
folk, was about to marry, she wrote
to her prospective motherinlaw;
Pray, have the goodness to decide
as you think best about the pretty
housemaid. | wish she were less
pretty and less fond OF dress. but II
her conduct and principles are good
neither are really Objectionable faults
! think our establishment will be q
pattern OF morality, particularly u
Mr.. Stanhope engares the squirting
butler and the terrible house maid HI
mentioned to me-"
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1914-03-13
But ha Didn't Hit Him.

The Judge-What did you hit this
man with?
Prisoner didn't hit him with any
thing.
The Judge-But look at him. He's
In a horrible condition. Surely you
didn't do that with your fists.
Prisoner-No. yer honor, l ketched
i'm by the heels and bumped i'm agen
d brick wall few times. But didn't
hit him with anything wanst
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1914-03-13
-Four Scholarships for Girls.

Sedala.--Mrs. Charles P. Hough y
Jefferson City, president OF the Mis-
souri, division. United Daughters oil
the Confederacy, has appointed MRS
George F. Longan of Sedalia a mem
Der OF the State committee on Educa
ton. The U. ID. c. is TO award four
scholarships next September. All ap
pIcations must be in by May l. Three
of the scholarships are at Christian
College. Columbia, and one at Cen
tral College for Women, at Lexington
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1914-03-13
Former Wife at Wedding.

Macon.-When Probate Judge Rom
jue OBLIGATED at the wedding Of Bert
Mclntire, rs years old, and Miss Chloe
Snowden Boron, 10. both the mother
and stepmother of the chlldbride were
present. Both women signed the mar
risge certificate az witnesses. The
brides father also made his mark TO
the document. The former Mrs. Dor
ron was carrying baby, the child oil
her third husband. Both women
chatted while the papers were being
fixed up.
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1914-03-13
Short Course for Physicians.

Columbia.-The University Of Mis-
souri, will offer short course in med
icine for practicing physicians in the
spring. A months instruction In the
preparation OF antltoxins and the sew
eral bacterial vaccines will begin
April 2S. Prof. d. II. Dolley and Prof.
o. w. II. Mitchell will be in charge
OF the work.
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1914-03-13
LiFE's ROAD
smoothed by Change Of Food.

Worry is big load to carry and an
unnecessary one. When accompanied
by Indigestion 1t certainly is cause for
the blues.
But the whole trouble may be easily
thrown off and LIES road be made
easy and comfortable by proper eating
and the cultivation Of good cheer.
Read what a Troy woman says:
Two years ago made the acQuaint-
ance Of 0rape-Nuts and have used the
food once day and sometimes twice.
ever since.
at the time ! began to use It life
was burden. ! was for years affiict,
ed with bilious sick headache, caused
by Indigestion, and nothing seemed to
relieve me.
The trouble became so severe
had to leave my work for days at q
time.
my nerves were in such state
could not sleep and the doctor said
was on the verge of nervous ,prostra
ton. saw al adv. concerning Grape
Nuts and bought package for tria!
What Grape-Nuts has done for me
is certainly marvellous. ! can nov
sleep like O child, am entirely fret
from the old trouble and have not hat
a headache in over a year. ] feel like
n new person. have recommended 4
to others. One man I knew ate prin
cipally Grape-Nuts while working OF
the ice all winter. and said he neve
felt better In his life"
Name given by Postum Co., BATH
Creek. Mich. Read The Road .
MELVILLE" in pkgs. There's Rea
SON"
Ever read the above ietters a nev
a,e sunears from time 20 time. The'
are Eeauine, true, and fulI cf hums
Gteresf.
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1914-03-13
Wants $4,000 from suItor.

Joplin.-Frank Thompson, q Car
thage merchant. has filed suit for $2o,
900 against Wiley Jones Of Carthage,
alleging malicious prosecution. Re
Gently Jones filed suit against ThonD'
son, alleging he had been the cause
of breaking OF an engagement between
Jones and Miss Martha Clark, bus
the case was dismissed, and It is On
this that Thompson buses his suit for
damages.
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1914-03-13
Raid Finds Dens Empty.

Springfield with search
warrants issued on information oil
members OF the special grand jury,
Sheriff George Spencer and his depu-
ties raided every supposed gambling
house in the city. In all Of the places
the furniture had been removed ard
not q single man was arrested.
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1914-03-13

"Your father has Q lot of very line
chickens" observed the young man
Has he incubatorsT' NO." said the
sweet young thing Just home from
boarding school, Il think they're Ply
mouth Rocks. Dallas News.
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1914-03-13
Py,blan Superintendent Named.

Springfield board of man
ayers OF the Missouri Pythian Home
recently completed here, announces
the appointment of G. II. Eppard OF
Moberly as superintendent. Mrs. Ep.
pard is to be matron.
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1914-03-13
wom.n In Mans carb Arrested.

Webb City.-Mfs. Josie Foot was
arrested here while dressed In meme
clothing. Her husband, Benjamin
Foot, recently was sentenced to the
penitentiary for two years fer steal
ing brass. She was accompanied by
Mack Hammond and said they were
on their way from Joplin TO Monett to
visit relatives.
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1914-03-13
Brilliant Idea.

Young Mother really don't know
why he cries so.
Bachelor Friend-Perhaps It is his
teeth coming through.
Young Mother-Maybe it's his hair
coming through that hurts him!
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1914-03-13
H,oh School Meet May 8 and 9.

Cape Girardeau.--The ninth annual
meeting OF the high schools included
In the 81 counties OF the Third nor.
NAL school district will be held here
May s and 8.
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1914-03-13
Rural uioh School Estsb,i.hed.

Maryvilie.-Five rural scnool dis.
tricts in this county have voted 1ob
to 10, to form o consolidated school
district and establish a rural high
school. The districts affected are:
Graham. Hayzlett. Stark, lyle and
Hickory Grove.
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1914-03-13
Ask Commission Form.

Hannibal-setitlons asking a spe'
cial election to give the voters an op'
portunity to cast their ballots on the
adoption of the commission form OF
government for Hannibal has been
presented to the city council.
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1914-03-13
~ Waa Ever Thus.

Riff-What Is your son doing thes'
days?
Raff-Me.-Nebrask Awgwan.
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1914-03-13
1000 eoys Enter Corn Contest.

Maryville-More than 400 young
men and boys enrolled in the corn
growing contest in Nodaway county
last year and an effort is being made
TO get 1000 interested in the contest
this season.
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1914-03-13
Indorse oosd Roads pm.

Louisiana.-The board OF directors
Of the Commercial club OF TINS city
Endorsed the Shackleford road bill
and wired the resolutions to State
Highway Commissioner Frank Al.
Buffam and Representative Shackle'
] ford IN Washington.
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1914-03-13
Talking Machines.

Papa, did Edison make the first
talking machine?"
mo, son, the Lord make the hrst
talking machine, but Edison made the
first one that could be shut of at will"
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1914-03-13

Constipation causes many serious do
eases. II Ia thoroughly cured by Docto.
Piercss Pleasant Pellets. One q laxative.
three for cathartic. Adv.
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1914-03-13
Joplin Ate. Free Text Books.

Joplin.-The Joplin board of sduca.
ton unanimously favored proposal
to adopt free text books In the grade
schools. and will present Il At the
election April Z.
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1914-03-13
Church Adds as msmbe n.

Maryville. - The First Baptist
church Of Naryville has added 80
members TO Its roll a. result Of a
series Of evangelistic services.
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1914-03-13
Would &c G. A. r. Commander.

Sedaila.-Willlam Lowe of Warrens
burg will be candidate for the com
mander of the Missouri division Of the
Grand Army OF the Republic at the
State meeting here In May.
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1914-03-13
Work, Then Get Pay.

ST. Joseph.-The custom OF payins
city officials their salaries in advance
has been discontinued by the county
treasurer.
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1914-03-13

But the average man would have No
use for mirrors II he could see him
self in them as other see him.
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1914-03-13
Mean.

'I have very thick head OF hair"
"I guess it's the result OF environ
ment."
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1914-03-13
aufhclnnf Proof.

Prisoner-All / want IL tusticeI
Lawyer-Then ] can save you from
Il on the grounds OF insanity
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1914-03-13

Any man can score a big hit with
woman; all he has TO do Is sit still
and listen
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1914-03-13
IYayREyAVESINa D ses SET
Hiph Hats.

The enormous height of the mil-
linery of 1914 led Jane Cowl TO re-
mark
81 know q man whose wife said to
him the other day:
"'Oh, dear, there's that old Christ
mas tree lying In the back yard over
a month now: don't know what on
earth TO do with It,
Cant you put 1t on your new
hat?' her husband asked"
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1914-03-13
Out Of Date.

Isn't she GRACEFUL"
YES, but horribly old fashioned
The SLOUGH Ia all the style nowadays
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1914-03-13

Your family Doctor can't do more for
your cough than Deans Men.holated
Cough Drops; ''they cure"--5c at Druggists.
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1914-03-13

Some men reach the top and then
become dizzy.
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1914-03-13
Correction.

my poor husband got mixed up In
nocently in that shooting ARRAY, and
the brought him home to me half
dead"
mo, madam; only half shot
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1914-03-13

Anybody can dye successfully with
Putnam Fadeless Dyes. Adv.
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1914-03-13

Many m opportunity is missed be
cause II isn't recognized.
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1914-03-13
Only One "BROMO oUININE"

To get the genuine, call for full name. LAxA.
TIVE BROMO QUlNIER. Look for signature d
T. w. GROVE. Cures Cold in Ono Day 49,
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1914-03-13

II Ia hard to forgive our enemies
when they have uB by the neck.
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1914-03-13

Standing on ones merits is good
but moving on them is better.
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1914-03-13
FROM ALL OVER the STATE
Galloway Considers Farm Advisor.

Fulton.--A meeting OF farmers OF
Galloway county will be held here TO
consider employing a farm advisor.
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1914-03-13

Reckless promises soon make q
man friendless.
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1914-03-13

When a girl lilts young man she
may do him great Rindness-but ne
doesn't realize II until later
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1914-03-13

n takes very long purse to buy
popularity.
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1914-03-13
jmpoYtapt 70 Mothe'

Important. TO Mothers =.
Examine carefully every bottle o.
CASToRIA, q safe and sure remedy for
Infants and children. and SOC that 10
Signature Of AxHZzlzw
In Use For Over 80 Years.
Children Cry for Fletcher's Castoria
The Farmington times. (Farmington, St. Francois County, Mo.) 1905-1926, 1914-03-13
Rae TO Be,

Has TO Be.
What fine building that ia"
Naturally; 1t Is police court -
Baltimore American.
The Brookings register. [volume] (Brookings, Brookings County, S.D.) 1903-1971, 1914-10-15
BOILED VS.. RAW MILK AS FOOD

Boiled milk has long been looked
upon as a very bad food for babies for
we have been told that boiled milk is
less easily coagulated by the action
of rennet; that the calcium salts are
changed; that organic phosphorus
compounds are diminished and inor-
ganic phosphorus (Which is not as
useful TO the body is increased; that
the ferments of the milk are destroy
ed, and that it is constipating.
Recent experiments and examina-
ton, however, have shown us the fol-
lowing facts which demonstrate that
there are advantages in the use of
boiled milk over that of raw milk.
(PasteuriZed milk is classified as raw
milk since it has not undergone the
changes that boiled milk has.) Boiled
milk forms a delicate curd in the
stomach instead of the hard coagula-
ton of raw milk. If the milk is not
raised above the boiling temperature
the chemical substances are not in
jured or destroyed. The ferments
found in raw or ~pasteurized milk (and
supposed to be necessary to the health
of the child) are not present in pure
milk but are derived from bacteria,
and moreover. they are not absorbed
in the alimentary canal but are de-
stroyed there and so could not be of
value to the body.
sickness and even death in children
than constipation, and therefore 1t
seems that instead of Directing to
boiled milk on that score it ought to
be used quite largely to check this
condition. Of course, diarrhoea is a
more common ailment with bottle fed
babies than with human fed and none
of the statements made apply to hui
man milk. The boiling of milk is
certainly a much simpler method Of
making it germ-free than the process
of pasteurization. It's use in Germany
is quite general and it is to be hoped
that on account of it's simplicity and
real advantages we may find its use
more widespread in this country.-By
Nola X. Fromme, Professor of Home
Economics, State College, Brookings.
The Brookings register. [volume] (Brookings, Brookings County, S.D.) 1903-1971, 1914-10-15

It's different when the endorsement
comes from home.
Easy to prove local testimony.
Read this Brookings case:
r. H. Anderson, Second ST., Brook.
lngs, s. d., says: For a long time |
had pain in the small of my back.
tried a number of remedies, but was
not helped until l began using Doan's
Kidney Pills. They did me a world
of good and l have told many people
about them"
Price soc, at all dealers. Don't
simply ask for a kidney remedy-get
Doan's Kidney Pills-the same that
Mr.. Anderson had. Foster-Milburn Co,
Props, Buffalo, n. Y.
The Brookings register. [volume] (Brookings, Brookings County, S.D.) 1903-1971, 1914-10-15

Get the Neid;ch Process ribbon, the
best that's made for typewriter pur-
poses, at the Register office.
The Brookings register. [volume] (Brookings, Brookings County, S.D.) 1903-1971, 1914-10-15
D FOR YOURSELF
Which Is Better-Try an Experiment
or Profit by a Brookings Citi.
zen's Experience

Something new is an experiment.
Must be proved to be as represented.
The statement of a manufacturer is
not convincing proof Of merit.
But the endorsement of friends is.
Now supposing you had a bad back.
A lame, weak, or aching me-,
Would you experiment on it?
You will read of many ~so-called
cures.
Endorsed by strangers from far.
away places.
The Brookings register. [volume] (Brookings, Brookings County, S.D.) 1903-1971, 1914-10-15
RUSSIAN Navy
WOEFULLy WEAK
Only -Four BatiI0shipS Capable
Of Effective Work.
OTHERS ARE OBSOLETE.

Handicapped Also by inexperienced
SaiIors-Has Never Recovered From
Japanese War-Now Building Many
New Ships In All Classes-Arma-
ment Is Poor.
~ YER since the disastrous war
with Japan the Russian navy
has been considered to be Of
little value by the other pow
ers, Until recently very little was
done toward building up the sea de-
lenses of the ears empire. but at the
present time there are four super
Dreadnoughts building. seven Dread
noughts, eight armored cruisers. six
cruisers. forty-Hve destroyers and
eighteen submarines, a total Of eighty
eight vessels In course of construction,
on almost twice as many as any 9TH
er country has planned.
Ships Ready For Use.
The actual number Of boats now in
readiness for use Is as follows:
Super-Dreadnoughts .....-.......... o
Dreadnoughts
Other battleships II
Armored cruisers
Cruisers Q
DeStrOyerS %
Torpedo boats "
Submarines 81
lOtdl ~
The Brookings register. [volume] (Brookings, Brookings County, S.D.) 1903-1971, 1914-10-15

Try a Popular Want.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1914-01-10
WILL SUIT HINGES
ON WORD DIAMONDS"
Term, as Used in. Testament of Mrs
Audenreid. 1t Is Said. Excludes
Other Jewels.

Andre De La Forest Divonne and Rene
De La Forest Divonne. through theii
guardian, Stanton C. Peelle. yesterday
filed answer to the suit Of Charles Y
Audenried and Charles ]. Bell. executors
of the will of the late Mrs Audenried
against Marguerite De La Forest Divonne
and others, for the Incorporation Of GER
tain jewelry in the corpus Of the estate
claiming that the term diamonds as
used in the will OF Mrs. Mary c. Auden-
ried does not include any jewels belong
ing to the estate of the deceased eS-
cept such as are actually diamonds ana
such articles Of jewelry as are set win
diamonds only and derive their princlpai
intrinsic value therefrom.
They claim that any jewels other than
diamonds belonging to the estate ana any
articles of tewelry not deriving their
principal intrinsic value from one or more
diamonds set therein. pass under the resi-
duary clause of the will for the beneht
of the defendants.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1914-01-10

High School building. was strongly urged
in a resolution adopted by the public
school committee of the Board Of Trade
at its meeting yesterday afternoon. The
resolution asked that the board go on
record at its next meeting as opposing
any division in the available fund.
Immediate action also was urged In
this resolution for a separate appropria-
ton for a new building for Eastern High
School A resolution congratulating the
board of education on its selection of
Ernest L. Thurston as superintendent Of
public schools was adopted.
Discussion conferred about the plan Of
supplying free school books for the stu
dents of the high schools, as is now done
in the graded schools This was referred
to the special committee appointed at
the last meeting with the request that
they take the question up with the board
of education and report to the public
school committee at its next meeting
The committee consists Of William II.
Singleton, chairman; w. l. Boyntol, and
Frank Sprigg Terry. Fred A. Fenning.
chairman, presided.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1914-01-10
SON OF ASBESTOS KING
RETURNS TO YOUNG WIFE

New York. Jan. s.-Mrs. Thomas Man.
Vile, jr.. who was. before her marriage,
Florence Huber, a chorus girl, and
whose husband is the son Of Thomas
Manville, the asbestos king. will no,
bring the suit for alienation Of her hus-
bands affections against her father-in-
law, as was reported several days ago.
She has won back her youthful husband
and together they are said to be on
their way to Pittsburgh to begin all
over again" And what is more impor-
tant they have between them $4,000. and
the laugh Is on Papa" Manville.
The Asbestos King succeeded some
time ago in convincing his son that his
career would be made easier for him
without his chorus girl wife. His arrange
ments were SO convincing that Manville, jr.
decided to give her up. The young wife
thereupon brought suit for 10000 dam
ages against Manville ST., for alternating
her husbands affections. That didn't
seem to trouble the Asbestos King
much.
In fact. II is said he was so overjoyed
to think that his son was to be free that
he gave him q check for $4,000 as a New
Years gift, and gave the chorus girl
wife $4,000. Besides this he promised his
son substantial allowance.
The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, 1914-01-10

me WsrlA AInaaae, Newly Geo.
plete, Halls tAs new Year.
The World Almanac and Encyclopsdia
mas made its annual appearance. II d
complete from the new tari6. the incosss
tax. and the currency bill to the nnaI
baseball score, and from the parcel post
to the state Of the woman suffrage move
ment -
In all the world. We are compelled to
Worlds.
The standing features Of the book are
fully present. as usual-the election re-
turns, the population tables, the statis-
ucs OF cities. Of crops, Of colleges, of
industries, Of churches. Of everything
that exists and grows There are the ex-
pecteo pages Of sporting records and the
facts or year In art. literature, and the
drama There are lists Of trusts and of
miihonaires and the condensed family
trees OF distinguished Americans There
are the Constitution. the Declaration Of
Independence. and the platforms of Do
htcai parties. There are q years chro-
noioey and years neurology. besides
the time tables of great events in years
past And there are other things which
u would take an almanac of ordinary
size-the World has its more than q
thousand pases-just to mention.
Contemplating the Worlds encyclopedias
issue, one Ia reminded with amusement
OF the progress since the days when an
almanac served chiefly to tell the calen-
OAR days, the changes Of the moon, and
the state Of the tide.