New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1914-07-19
THE TALK OF THE DAY.

man of foreign birth strolled into the de'ectl'e
bureau of the Bathga;e av police station IN '"e
pronv and asked Lieutenant John Morrel If it was
necessary to have Il permit 20 give party III hohor
Of his son. who had just returned from college
rbis ,yos - new one or Morrell. and he asked the
,isi+or what college his son had graduated from
The answer was "Elm;ra" After recovering from
his surprise the lieutenant informed his caller tha'
he hotter have police protection II all the guests
wore graduates from the same institution. Inc
foreigner left the station wondering "ha' the oe
.ective was smiling about.
ANY family having ancestors can make use OF lhe
nedinval armor that may have been inhefteu'
cutting it down to fit the children that nave "
associate with the unmuzzled dogs OF the neig"oo'
hood.-Chicago News
Chicken meat grown by electricity is the latest
thing on the English food market. An eNperinen'e'
has found that subje ting chickens to The influence
of an electrical current for ten minutes every hour
during the dag made them ready Tor the hain''
in FIVE weeks as against three months py oiuei
methods The current applied IN an l''en
sivc chicken house. consisting Ct six fats. each
large enough to accommodate seventy-hVe ehieNe"S'
electrified By large helix of heavily insulated WIRE
wound around il in turns about six inches apart
Still, when you See girl kissing dog you ought
to remember that ti.c dog doesn't smoke clsaie'''S
Washington Herald.
The observant citizen who visited the feoer"
Building after the death OF Commissioner 'o"H ~
Shields found something to talk about FOR hea'I'
sixty years Mr.. Shields was an important "sute !"
the building, always close to the centre u v''e
stage. with his services always in demand Yet
no court adjourned out of respect to his memory
the business of his Office went Oh the same as
q
nearest approach to tribute was paid By ore OF
his friends among the reporters assigned TO the
building who whom word Of the Commissioners
death was received stopped the Office clock
"What does Algernon call his motor boat?
Depends or how the engine is working NAN
City Journal
John A. Bates, who for many years has presided
at an all-night drug store in the Tenderloin' has
.ho Loot word 20 say on the question of safe and
sane Fourth.
"puu night. Doc" observed Of the regulars
as the holiday was about over.
"Dull, | should say it was replied Bates; IT'S
been so dull I've been refusing to sell alcohol all
night, thinking it was Sunday"
as your boy Josh much help to you on the
81 should say So" replied Farmer Corn.ossel
al don't know what we'd do without him when the
summer boarders want to tango ashlngtoh star.
George F. Phillips stood in the door of his place
Of business talking with Dr. F. C. Kneer when
brewery wagon, newly painted, passed.
"Hey, look at the wagon" exclaimed Phillips;
"see that sign, Blanks pure beer the temperance
drink"
"Yes." replied Kneer "but do you see that sign
on the tailboard?"
The sign in huge letters read Danger"
whats ;he trouble John ?" exclaimed the amazed
wife.
Hot weather."
Hot weather can't give you a black eye"
the best way to keep oOl."-Washngton Star.
Some little uptown boys playing Judge a
game invented by the daddy Of two of the boys.
They think it's lots Of fun. One of the boys in the
game impersonates judge, another the District At
torney, another a criminal while others the fore
Of the jury. Il policeman. a jaer and the attor
ney for the defence Any that remain jurymen
After one Of the youngsters commits "crme" he is
arrested and brought TO trial with all the legal for
mailities the children remember
This time Of the young tiers supposed to
have killed another, out he protested his innocence
vigorously. Then IN rose the victim"
"Of YOU did r." he said. Cant you see
I'm dead?