The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1914-01-09
SIMEON FORD BREAKS
P0ST-PRANDIAL VOW
Tells Hotel Men Of the Joys Of
Being Scorned by Cute
Little Nurses.
DAY OF PLAIN MAN PAST
Broadway Central and Grand
Union Only Relies of
Good Old Days.
DAY OF PLAIN MAN PAST

Hotel men see so many persons trying
to have a good time in their various
hostelries that when they themselves get
together 10 celebrate they know just what
to do, just what to eat and just what to
drink. SO IL was last night ut the thirty
NTH annual banquet OF the Hotel Asso-
citation of New York City ut the Waldorf
Astoria. There were 500 hotel managers,
owners and other prominent folk pres
ent.
Simeon Ford of the Grand Union Hotel
was the chef druvre of the evening. He
hadn't been heard In an after dinner
speech IN long time, as he had taken
AN oath not to make another, but among
other things he said:
Through immemoral custom l have
become almost as much part Of the
Hotel Mems dinner as the oysters. l
differ from the oysters. however. In this
| respect: II takes surgical operation to
open an oyster. while II takes "a surgical
| operation to close me up.
Last year l was not with you. The
very day you had your legs stretched
under Boldts mahogany, my leg was being
pulled by high priced surgeon up at st.
Luke's. While you We're seated at tables
groaning with good things l was n good
thing grooming on an operating table.
Those Of you who have never had
occasion to part with any Of your vital
| organs have no idea how embarrassing
II Is to shy man. to be strapped on a
table. EN- deshabille. surrounded by cute
little trained nurses gazing at you scorn-
fully. while "A surgeon with a glittering
eye and a sharp cleaver prepares to ex-
p!ore your interior.
1T was a great comfort to me. however.
to realize that I had led a pure and
blameless life and never charged the pub
lie for bread and butter or for hanging
up their hats and coats. had always trans
ferred baggage to and from the station
free and md never encouraged turkey
trottins with victuals.
"Of all the hotels that rourished when
l began business the Broadway Central
| and the Grand Union are about the only
| survivors. We are the last OF the Mo-
| heganS, with our backs to the wall, hang.
| ing on by the eyeLds Ga very difficult
position to maintain, you will admit -
We belong to the early Victorian pitcher
and bowl don't blow out the gas, no hot
| hatrons In the bedrooms period. In our
palmy days the chief requisites of the
successful hotel landlord were a team OF
trotting horses a bunch OF wistaria
spr!nging from the Adams apple and a
gift for holding three Of kind.
| when we pass away the plain man
will have no place to lay his head
The plain man will have to buy a
| Tuxedo suit and wrist watch carry
his handkerchief up his coat sleeve. learn
| how TO pronounce 'hors d'Puvre' and be
generally wretched."
| Mr. Ford then took few shots at the
new president of the association. Mr..
| Bauman.
at seems but Yesterday that Baumann
opened the Holland House. We all said
he would fail We said there were not
| enough millonaires TO support II. We
! said the public would never stand for
soup spoons with rounded ends which
, they couldn't push into their faces. But
| we were wrong. Whatever he under
! takes he gets away with. See how he
got me TO come here when ! had sworn
never to attempt another speech.
| II advised Baumann to adopt the
| simple life instead of coming up In our
| ncighborhood to put us all out OF business,
| but he would not listen TO me. think
! the key To- his reason may be found In
| the name he selected for his new hotel
| the Biltmore. You remember Bert Will
Iams's old song.
| "Every little bit, added to what you got,
Makes just a little Bit more"
Beside him ut the guest table last night
sat Gustav Baumann. president Of the
| association and proprietor OF the new
Biltmore Edward G. Boldt OF the Wal
dorf; Edward NJ. Tierney. who. besides
being iHr lOdstiIldstef, HeIDs 10 run tue
Hotel Victoria and does run the Arlington
In Blnghamton, where the home folks read
his silver tongued speeches with greater
avidity than they do President Wilson's
the Rev DR.. David james Burrell the
Rev. DR.. Charles l.. Jefferson. John
McGlynn. president OF the New York
state Hotel Association Francis y. Balm.
the retired president OF tho New York
city association Excise Commissioner
Farley, Harry =. Stmson. secretary of
the association. Thomas d. Green. vice.
president; T., NJ. Statler. who manages
hotels In Buffalo and Cleveland and II
building another in Detroit, Frederick W.
Rockwell, president OF the Good Roads
Association of New York David ii. Knott.
n member of the associations executive
committee. and the Rev. James H. WATSON.
Besides other we'll known hotel men.
there We're present a representative con
tingent Of state Senators and Assembly
men. and Judges and justices.