davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Arizona republican., 1914-04-26

it was determined to sind Gin'ra Lord, Cuff over
 to see tn screty iv war an discuss tn matther with him. Tn supreem chief iv tn army re- ceived him sterny an, afther tn tea things had been cleared away, demanded to know why he had disobeyed ordhers, an wud he give him a light? We have decided to discontinue this crool, unnecessary war; says tn gin'ral grufay, pufin' cigareet. Why? says tn sicrety iv war angrily. Because says tn gin'ra, in tn first place tn inimy ar-re armed, says he. That is raison that don't appeal to me at this distance
 says tn sicrety iv war haughtily. An in tn
Arizona republican., 1914-04-26

if l was gin'ra divvle a fut cud they dhrive me into a war without they loaded cannon behind me. If statesman come to me an said. Gin ral Dooley, in ordher to square nesilf with me con stitooentS in Kansas 1 must ast ye to grab tn ol' flag an rush into a gory grave I'd say, No. thank ye'kndly,' I'd say; Uncomfortable here. It's good job. tn quarthers are to me likin, an I'm told be- th' fair that tlr unyform is becomin.
 " have,no hard feelin's at all again amy for
 eign nations whativer., Th' foreigners have met has been agreeable fellows. If ye feel badly about tn way tn governlintt iy Pattygonya is actin, ii
Arizona republican., 1914-04-26

campaigner he is. It was plain at wanst that it wud be worse thin folly to attimpt to attackt this disprit an well armed organization It is ap- parent to me that we have been outnanoovered,' said Gin'ral Cuff It wud be military crime to sacrifice British army in such rash enther- prise,' said Gnral Bluff Carson is in dsprit mood, said Gin'ral Muff 'Hiven knows what he might do if pressed. He has had lagal thrainin
 an he might get out an injunction against us. l will not lead me gallant fellows against possible concealed writ or some devilish conthrivance like that I've been in such an action befure, in tn chancry coorts, an know tn cost, he says. So
Arizona republican., 1914-04-26

in Ireland They are an onraisonable an slow actin people, while we're raisonable an impetchns
 But whin sojers sthrike don't know what's goin' to happen Tn nex' thing ye know polls man will refuse to catch a burglar because tn house he's robbin' is ownded by a Republican. Thin fireman will come down tn ladder, throw tn hose on tn ground, an say: Cap, ain't goin' to squirt out that fire. l see pitcher iv Willum Jennings Bryan on tn wall An tn cap will say: 'Ye done right. me boy. Sind tn compny back to tn mine house.
 Annyhow, l don't blame gin'ral fir not wantin' to fight With sojer it's diff rent, but
Arizona republican., 1914-04-26

inimy I'd pick out wud be thim tough fellows firm tn north. As foreigners despise thim, but as fellow counthrymen an inirnies hold thim ill tn highest regard. Now that tn military has
 retired, if tn polls will kindly step aside, we'll resoom tn argymnt where it was left off whin tn English had tn presumtion to intherfere.
 Good mornin', Alexandher; take that. How dye do, Michael, tn same to ye with this pick ak! We understand each other perfeckly. So we must fight. Nawthin' leads to throuble so quick as perfeclS undherstandin' Tn English don't understand us an they always mess things up
Arizona republican., 1914-04-26
m nnnnnyW W in Aipydsh hud mou o
 umn without nkna along"

sicond place. says tn gin'ra1 with rsin' anger, l won't make amy further sacrifice iv blood an threasure to put Ireland in tn hands iv people that keep Lent with so much bigotry that they'd soon desthroy tn salmon fshn,' says he. Why didn't ye say that befure? says tn sicrety v war. l had no idee that such horrible catasthrophy was starin' us in tn face, he says. An, embracin' tn gin'ral an pinnin' tn Victory cross on his chest, he sint him back with instructions fir tn army to beat nasty rethreat. An they beat it.
 "I don't blame English gin'rals f'r not wantin' to fight thim Ulsther men. If I was an English man, which, thank goodness, I'm not, tn last
Arizona republican., 1914-04-26


 Whats happened9" asked Mr. Hennessy.
 It's hard fir me to make out firm tn frag- mentary reports iv tn war corryspondnts," said MT. Dooley. But as far as I can see tn situa- ton stands about like this: Tn army iv Ulsther has won a splindid v;ckthry, but tn English army has not been disgraced. It has rethreated with colors hyin, dhrums batn, an nayether its honor nor its buttons tarnished. Gin'ral Ed Car son, tn dauntless leader iv Ulsther, magnan mously permitted tn officers to retain their side arms dancin' programs, tea caddies, an enough nlarrnalade to sustain thim ont fresh supplies can be forarded firm home. Gin'ral Carson is to be proclaimed king or impror v forty four per cint iy tn county iv Anthrim, impror v thirty per cint iy tn County Down, an protictor iv tn County Donegal, or such part thereof as needs his protic ton. It was gr-reat war, an I'm glad it's over an ordher has been restored in Ireland. Now ye may see some hghtin'.
 Arly in January tn king iv England ordhered an immeejit attack on tn rebels undher Gin'ral Carson. A council iv war was hurridly called, consistn iv Gin'ral Lord Guff Gin'ral Lord Stuff, Gin'ral Lord Bluff, Gin'ral Lord Muff, an Gin'ral tn Hon'rable Percy Algernon Herbert Fluff. Owin' to tn unaccountable delay in tn tailorin' departmint tn unyforms were not com pleted ontil arly in March, whin intinse excite mint was noticed at tn war ofhce Cabs dashed up an dashed away, walters rushed in an out, an all tn grim signs iv tn corin conflict cud be obsarved Inside tn op structure whn tn tea things had been cleared away, tn sthratejists gathered around tn boord an laid out tn plan iv campaign Afther that ivints followed in rapid succssion. It was determined to reconoither tn inimys position at wanst. A sthrong foorce undher Gin'ral Fluff swooped down on a neigh borin' news stand an, afther a brief but fierce resistance, which did honor to both parties, pro- cured copies iv all tn mornin' pa-apers. These were hurrid to tn council boord, where afther hasty examination iv tn racin' news tn gn'ras gleaned firm spies that Gin'ral Carson's foorces numbered in tn neighborhood iv firm wan thou san to five hundherd thousan' picked men, most iv thim silicted firm tn ladin' stores v Belfast but includin' gr-reat nanny who had seen achal service undher Lord Londonderry, ayether mounted or as footmen. They were well armed with rifles, monkey wrenches, pick axes bikes, hosepipe, bricks, nutmeg graters, an religious convictions. They were inthrenched behind count CTS or in buffers panthries, an nanny iv thin were in tn shipyards, where it wud be almost impossible to attack thim without takin' pois- man along. Gin'ral Carson himsilf occypied house in tn suburbs, where he was heavily guarded be aifew jealous frind, an made occa- siOnal SOrtics in cab fir lunch or dinner but always took his breakfast at home, like tn or
Arizona republican., 1914-04-26
 ax!"

ye'eT impetchus blood is bilin' beyond endurance, ii nawthir but saughther will satisfy yeer ardent nature, yell find me soord hangin' in tn closet. Iaf it, me boy, an lead ye'erslf to death or vict1lry, or both. I'll stay back here an tell ye what to do fr m time to time, I'd say No, sir if Andhrew Carnaygie ra-aly wants to have peace an isn't ony on spree with his money he'll stop hirln orators an thry to have tn English idee took up be all tn wurrud Lave tn maxim v war to tn ginras an we'll have peace. No gin'ral ought to go to war onless he was ready, an no gin ral that knows his business ought iver to be ready. Maybe that's why we've had so few wars lately. Tn statesmen ar-re always prepared to fly somebody else at tn throat v tn niny iv their counthfy, but just as things looks fine fr fight tn ginral steps in an whispers in tn statesman's ear: We are in a wretchedsstate iv onreadiness We have on'y three millyon men an not more thin siventy thousand myon rounds iv arlnyni- ton, an we'd be bate in a week, an he goes home an goes to bed an tn nexs day th, pa -apers says tn situation has been improved by mutual con- cessvons % But with tn private sojer it's diff rent If ye left it to him thered be nawthin' but war Tn martial Jooties iv sojer in pipn times iv peace. slogan says, seems to excite him to go out an kill some wan, A young fellow, afther changn' his name sos his parents won't know he's took Up tn ancient an noble pro-fissyon iv arms, ensts an goes where glory waits him. Whin it ketches him it ayether puts him to wurruk at his old tlrade at wan-fifth tn union scale or taches him new an akelly unpleasant occupation. A plumber who goes into tn army to duck tn dis graceful pro-fssyon at five dollars day finds he's wipin jints in tn barracks fir wages that wud make in .walkin' dillygate have him shot at sun rise Whin not dhrillin' or writin' letters to tin pa -aper compainin' about tn food he idles away his time in c,lrrym horses, shinglin' roofs, hoen' weeds in tn colOnels garden. or wheelin' tn majors baby in tn peramby yator Some day he does somethin' that if he done 1t befure he become a hero tn most he cud get wud be ten days vacation in tn bridewell. Tn coort martial takes into account all tn extenooatn circumstances an gives him two years at hard labor. Small blame to him if ye niver hear him yein hooray whin Andhrew Carnaygie goes on. No, sir; if had iver been timpted be thim colored pitchers to enlist an tn gin'ral was to come to me an say, Corporal fir I'd be that or nawthin'-'t tn governmint wishes ye to go out an fight, Hin missy, ye'er best frind Can we rely on ye? I'd say Hinnissy? That little, disagreeable fellow? Why, I've wanted to shoot that man fir forty years Thin will lead ye to victhry.' don't care where ye lead me to. On'y lead me away firm here
 'I see in tn pa-aper that if thim gin'rals were in Germany they'd be hanged" said Mr. Hen- messy.
 If thim gin'rals were in Germany they wuddent be gin rals, said Mr. Dooley.
 lCopyright: 1914: By Finley Peter Dunnal
Arizona republican., 1914-04-26

UI/ ELL, sir," said MT. Dooley, I'm glad w to see tn throuble in Ulsther is over"
 Whats happened?" asked MT.
Evening capital news. (Boise, Idaho) 1901-1927, 1914-08-16
A Colored Philosopher.

One hot July afternoon Rastus John
son, gentleman of color and his fam
lily of nine, who depended almost en-
tirely on the town for. their support,
started away from home all logged
out in their best, each carrying a supply
of eatables. One of their benefactors
happened to meet them on the road.
well, Uncle Rastus, where are you
going with all your family so dressed
up7" he asked.
We'll Boss" said Sam. "doan' you
know the circus am come to town.
Yes, but l can't afford to take all
my family"
well. I'll tell yer. Boss. it's Jes dis
away wild us. We don sol de heatin'
stove cause de winter am fur off
but de circus am herein National
Monthly.
Evening capital news. (Boise, Idaho) 1901-1927, 1914-08-16
MRS. ANNA MOODY.

I hereby announce myself as a can
didate for the office OF County Treas
urer of Ada County upon the Repub-
lean ticket, subject to the action of
the Republican voters in the primaries
to be held on the first Tuesday of Sep
TENDER.
| feel that / am qualified to fill the
position which L seek, having taught
school for seven years In Franklin
county, Missouri, and two years in
Missoula, Montana. and. having had
experience in other lines whch / con-
slider qualities me for this position.
| have been a resident of Idaho for
Is years, and of Ada county IL years.
have always been a staunch Repub-
lican and an earnest and ardent work.
err for the party and it's candidates. If
elected to the offiee which l seek.
promise to give the people of Ada
county faithful and efficient service.
MRS. ANNA NJ. MOODY.
ADV.
Evening capital news. (Boise, Idaho) 1901-1927, 1914-08-16

AT THE REPUBLICAN PRIMARIES SEPTEMBER 1st
comes the
good
him
Evening capital news. (Boise, Idaho) 1901-1927, 1914-08-16
RAYMOND L. OWENS,
Prosecuting Attorney.

The record of the way in which
Raymond l.. Givens, prosecuting at
torney. has handled the legal business
of the county in an efficient and eco
nomical manner is a better guide as to
his qualifications for the position than
the impossible promises made by one
who has had little experience in the
trial of criminal cases. Mr.. Givens
would appreciate the approval of a
second term since he was first elected
to this office two years ago and has
served but one full term. Promises
are easily made. but to be worth con.
sidering they must be backed by more
than words. BY keeping Raymond L.
Givens. prosecuting attorne.-, in offe.
for second term, the public have thu
services of a man who has redues<
expenses.--Adv.
Evening capital news. (Boise, Idaho) 1901-1927, 1914-08-16

Montpelier Examiner: Repub-
lican papers in all sections of the
state are rallying to the support
of Governor Haines and his re-
nomination is already practically
assured. Governor Haines is as
much entitled to reelection as any
governor the state ever had.
Blackfoot Republican; 1t takes
a couple of years for a man to
learn how to conduct this office,
and 1t is customary to re-elect
him if he is honest and efficient.
We believe that Governor Haines
is entitled to second term on
this condition, and that it will be
for the best interest of the state
to re-elect him.
Sugar City Times: While 9TH
ers deal in glittering generalities,
Governor Haines gets concrete re-
suits.
Paris Post: The administration
of Governor Haines has been such
as to reflect credit upon both him
self and the Republican party and
by all the rules of precedent he is
entitled to a denomination.
Idaho Falls Post: Haines' re-
nomination is sure.
Teton Valley News; The re-
nomination of Governor Haines
is not now seriously questioned
in any quarter.
BurIey Bulletin: 1t is conceded
on all hands that Governor John
M Haines has proven himself one
of the bes. executives that the
state of Idaho ever had.-Adv.
Evening capital news. (Boise, Idaho) 1901-1927, 1914-08-16


In seeking the position of county at
torney of Ada county l am only exer-
cising the right which / have as a
citizen and taxpayer of this county
No man has the absolute right to say
that any one person $ an inherited
position in an office merely because he
has twice filled it. If am nominated
and elected to this position two terms
would be the length of time l should
care to occupy the office, should the
people care to have me serve them a
second time.
We hear great deal about saving
money for the taxpayers, but many Of
ficials are not wiling to reduce the
running expenses of their office AS a
taxpayer in this county, and having the
interests of the public at heart, l can
assure the voters that If nominated
and elected to this position, that I
shall at once reduce the running ex-
penses of this office over $1,000 each
year.
l shall also reduce the costs of liti.
cation to the taxpayers in requiring
complainants in petty cases, where the
dignity of the state is not injured, to
protect the county from the costs, aris-
ing where after careful investigation
deem such case without merit.
If the people feel that l shall be eff
ficient careful and conservative. fair
and impartial, consistent and econom-
ical in the administration of this office.
shall be glad to Lave their votes for
me at the primary election.
Very Respectfully,
ADV. T. S. RISSER.
Evening capital news. (Boise, Idaho) 1901-1927, 1914-08-16
en-. STOLE
Candidate for the Nomination for
State Inspector of Mines on the
Republican Ticket.

Received his professional training at
the schools of mines in Prague and
Pribram, Bohemia. and has been, for
the past rs years, actively connected
with the mining, smelling and milling
industry in Montana and Idaho. Brit
ish Columbia and Mexico.-Adv. A16
Evening capital news. (Boise, Idaho) 1901-1927, 1914-08-16
JOHN P. CONGDON

Candidate for Nomination for State
Senator on the Republican Ticket.
Standing squarely on the platform.
Particularly interested in securing
legislation to effect Lower taxes.
More efficiency in public service.
Federal construction of Inter State
roads.
Land and Timber Grants to aid
building roads within the State
More and better highway and rail-
road connections between the capital
and all parts of the State.
More cooperation between tho State
and Federal Governments in irrigation
and drainage projects. ADV.
Evening capital news. (Boise, Idaho) 1901-1927, 1914-08-16

1 have been engaged in business in
this county practically all my life, and
am acquainted with many people and
with local conditions, and my reputa-
ton is well known. | aspire to be
sheriff and shall gratefully appreciate
it if you will consider my qualifications
when you vote for nominee for that
office. EMMETT PFOST.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1914-06-05
InflammabIe CeIIuloid.

Celluloid, being first cousin of gun
cotton and closely related to nitro
glycerin, is highly iniammable and
should never be brought in close pro-
unity to fame Celluloid is COM
pound of cellulose or vegetable tibrine,
reduced by acids to guncotton. Cellu-
lose is found in all vegetable life, par
ticularly in young plants. 1t is a
starchlike substance. Cotton fiber Is
principally cellulose. After the cotton
fiber is cleaned it is submerged in
acids, which quickly reduce 1t to cellu-
lose in the form Of a thick, pasty, semi
transparent mass. Camphor is added
further to thicken it, and the required
coloring matter is thoroughly mixed
in, after which the celluloid is nodded
by heat and pressure into various use
full and ornamental objects, such as
combs, boxes, pins, paper cutters, or
naments, etc.-New York World.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1914-06-05
Iearn to Write Well.

First legibility, second sightliness,
should be the endeavor in handwriting
and let the character and the "indi-
viduality" take care of themselves. If
you wish to devise a signature hard
to forge that is another thing, but
ones everyday handwriting should be
plain and as good looking as one can
make it. The art of writing a neat,
legible, well punctuated, correctly ex-
pressed and spelled letter should be-
long to every high school graduate,
much more to every college graduate,
and the thanks of the community are
due to those who are testing and try
ing to improve our methods of educa-
ton; but they must remember that the
letter style is properly more loose and
conversational than any other and
therefore should not be criticised In just
the same way.-Kate Epson Clark In
Leslie's.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1914-06-05
SPEED OF GAME BIRDS.

The Hazel Hen Said to Be Wonder In
Short Squirt.
What is the fastest game bird that
flies? OF course, in seeking an answer
to the question, as a writer in the
Scotsman points out, one must assume
equal conditions of atmosphere and
cause for fight, for all creatures, hui
man or other, seek their highest rate
of speed under the influence of fear.
A recent writer declares that in a
race of, say, 200 yards he would back
a bird which, though not found in Brit
ain, is indigenous to most of the rest Of
Europe and is especially familiar in
Scandinavia-the hazel hen or geli-
notte.
Yet, curiously enough, this is one of
the forest haunting birds which, like
the American ''fool hen" usually fly
up into a tree when flushed and, re-
jecting further attempts at escape,
elect to be shot sitting. But" says the
writer referred to above, ION the rare
occasions land that they are rare l
readily admit when one catches geli-
notte In the open l have never seen
any bird fly so fast nor move its wings
with such extraordinary rapidity."
Next to it at any rate one must sure
ly place the teal, which has marvel
GUS knack Of getting under way quick,
ly. Some experienced observers would
give the third place to bluerock pig
eon-the wild, not the Nottingham va
riety.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1914-06-05
WEST BURKE

Mr. and. Mrs. Fred French of St.
Johnsbury spent the wedk end at
A. H. Silson's.
Mrs Ida Powers entertained Mrs
MRS. Mary Parker of St. Johnsbury
recently.
Mrs. Flora Washburn spent the
past week in town with relatives.
Leon Densmore visited OF R. w.
Densmore's over Sunday.
MIR and Mrs. F. H, Frashier
spent Decoration Day in St. Johns
bury.
Henry Burns of Lyndonville was
in town Memorial Day;
Jos. Lucier and wife of East
Burke attended thesMemorsalss day
exercises of the G., "A. R. and R.
c. on Saturday.
Mrs. B. H. Fairbanks attended
the W.C.T.T. convention at East
Barnet the past week.
Mrs. Adam Abar entertained her
aunt, Mrs. Phillips of NH. over
Sunday.
Guy Smith visited Ehis mother,
Mrs. May Smith the past week.
Albert Hall is spending a few
days at his home in Lyndon.
Mrs. Cynteia Aldrsch entertained
her daughter, Mrs. Roundy of Lyn-
donyille, over Sunday.
Mr.. and Mrs. Chas. Waite, of
St. Johnsbury, are in town with re-
latives.
Mrs Ernest Miles and son Leigh
ton, returned Friday from visit at
at Hardwick.
Mrs. Bige1ow spent Decoration
Day with her son Avery in Lyn-
donville.
Harry Woodruff is seriously sick
with pneumonia at this writing.
Mr.. and Mrs. Jesse Parent of St.
| Johnsbury, spent the week end at
Aenry Turner'S.
Miss Eva Rosebrooks is in Bar
ton thisSweek for the commence
ment exercises.
Mrs. Chas. Fletcher is sick with
ly grippe.
Miss Julia Walter is visiting her
sister, Mis-. Geo. Cole, at East
Burke.
Mrs. B. D. Ruggles was in Lyn-
donville Monday.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1914-06-05

Mrs, Ida Powers, Mrs. Emma
Coburn, Mrs. B. D. Ruggles, Mrs.
F.E. Ruggles, Mrs. w. E. Cheney
and Mrs. Cora ChappelI are attend
ing the Grand Chapter, O.E.S. at
Burlington this week
Ernest Robbins and wife having
finished work for A. D. Fogg have
gone to their home in Sutton.
Eddie Fogg and wife Of n. II.
visited their parents over Sunday.
Oscar Cushman and family spen-
Sunday at Dyndon Centre with re
letives.
At the w, c. T. u. convention
held in Barnet last week, Mrs. May
Cheney was elected County Supt.
of Scientific Temperance Instruc.
ton.
Clyde Bishop is in Wells River
and vicinity this week.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1914-06-05
THE ART OF SELLING.
Real salesmanship Is a Light Tha'
Can't Be obseursd.

Real Salesmanship Is a Light That
Can't Be obseursd.
The boss wants lockers. because he
knows the locker OF today is the buyer
Of tomorrow and he wants to make
the lockers feel that his store is the
best place to trade" which is only an
other way OF saying that It Is the best
place to do ones looking. He aso
knows that the locker of today can
sometimes be converted into a buyer
before the day is over. All he requires
to accomplish what he desires is sales
manship among his salespeople.
Does he get it? Not from all Of
them. If he did there would be less
need for commissions to inquire labo-
riously into the relation between shop
girls wages and shopgirls chastity,
for real craftsmanship will get the
money wherever it is practiced and by
whomsoever it is practiced. Real sales
manship is one light that can't be hid
den under a bushel. It's a light that
can't be obscured. It's a light that
will shine above department heads and
floorwalkers and reach clear up to 1.-The
old man" in his private Office, if you
keep it burning long enough.
What is craftsmanship? No one quite
knows. But if you will take care of
the lockers, if YOU will make all the
lockers pleasantly remember what you
showed them and how you showed it
to them when they were merely look
ing, you will have mastered one very
important branch of retail salesman
Bhip.-Collier's Weekly.
Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1914-06-05
Within the Law,

A real negro nanny of the old type
came up the walk through the old fash
Toned garden to the side porch. She
had basket of fresh aigs'' on her
arm and was offering them for sale.
Are you sure they are perfectly
fresh, auntie?" asked the lady who
came out of the house.
"Yes'um, they sho is all right, Miss
Bess. Amt nary disorderly aig amongst
em."-New York Post.