The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1914-04-14
The Eoe1,ing Story

Hunting the Eggs.
(By Lawrence Alfred Clay.)
Gertrude Hammond was an old
maid.
1t isn't written down in any book of
etiquette that after q girl has passed
her twenty-seventh birthday she be-
comes an old maid, but It II the law
OF every community.
This law Ia held to more strictly in
the country than in the city. In social
circles In the city woman il ex-
pected to lie at least three years about
her age. In the villages or farming
communities there IL q diary In almost
every house. and 1t IL recorded In that
diary when q child II born to any fam
lily. Had Gertrude Hammond claimed
to be "a years old, and not a minute
dug out of old chests in the garnet.
and q dozen women would have
smacked their lips with satisfaction
over the entries that proved the young
woman a prevaricator.
Yes. it was 81 years. but why was
Miss Gertrude an old maid yet? Va
rfous women assigned various seasons.
but the real reason was that the right
man hadn't como along yet. The
young woman was no beauty. but
neither was she homely.
They say she is waiting for some
thing better than our men around
here!" snapped old Mrs. Rober to a
neighbor as the subject was under
discussion. well. let her wait and
see how she will come out. If the men
around here are good enough for 9TH
ers they are good enough for Gertrude
Hammond, ana; lie has been told -.
toO.'' -
Yes. she has and 1 was the one
that told her."
And what did she say?" M
mot a word.s'
Good! have q cousin who could
have married twice. but she stuck mp
her nose at tho offers received, and
tho first thing. abe knew she was forty
five years old 41d mo- man wanted
hertz
Gertrude. Il IN rsfsnd that Robert
Hilton, no the eewanill for
stuck On hsf slld called there three
yes. md Zach time she held the
cat ON her laD!'
''Sho did %
Yes, and All ishe said was to ask
him II it wasn't funny that while he
couldn't see in tie dark q cat could!"
And he didn't have . chance to
tell her that he loved her?"
mot a living chance."s
Well. she'll pay for being 80 mighty
partfcular!'' ,sfax
DO You know where she is going
now!" asked old Mrs. Rober after a
silence.
ITO pass three or four days with
Mrs. Taylor. she that was Helen Blake
ly before she was married"
Gone to separate husband and
wife?"
"Old maids are always at it,
vy311 hn a hy1RnfnG lh0 ff
she makes any trouble there. Say,
weir
you know that awful homely tin
peddler called Pretty Sam'?''
Yes. He always stops here when
he comes along"
'They say he's wanted a wife for
the last. five years. but il SO infer
nally homely that no one will have
him.
at guess that's 3d."
st know he's in the village. and he'll
likely call here. Let's send him out to
Taylor's and tell him that Gertrude Is
looking for a husband"
.sWe'n do it! It'll make her boil
over, but what dol we care? She ought
to be made to understand what folks
think Of her ways:
wanted a wife. Yes, he would marry
an old maid. Yes, he would drive out
to Taylor's and pop the question be-
fore he had been in the house five min
utes. No, he was not a man that could
be bluffed.
Man proposes, but his plans some
times wobble. The peddler arrived at
Taylor's to be told that Miss Gertrude
was out at the barn looking for eggs.
A hen layeth where she nsteth- If she
listeth to fly up on tho hAy-mow and
drop the egg there 1t means that the
hunter must climb the ladder after -.
The old maid heard q cacklfng from
above az she reached the barn. Thst
was the sign thok there was at least
one egg up there. Fourteen feet up to
that cackle, and tho ladder was per-
pendicu1ar. Some climbing for an old
maid. She took = look from all doors
and then went NIB while the cacklfng
hen went down.
Yes, there was tho egg. The hen
had not shirked her duty. though she
might have laid zone with double
yolk, while she was about It. Hens
may come to see this in time.
Looking up q ladder and looking
down one are two different points Of
view. When Miss Gertrude was ready
to descend she found herself trem-
bling and apprehensive. 1t made her
head swim to look down. She put out
a foot and drew back with q shudder.
It was just then that the peddler en-
tered the barn in search Of her.
''Oh, I'm so giadr exclaimed the
prisoner at SIGHT Of him.
"So'm I, b'gosh!s he replied.
Wont you go In and ten Mrs. Tay-
lor that I can't get DOWN.?
After q bit. dear. So you was ex-
pecting me?''
why, no.
IT'S just the same. have called to
see II you didn't want to get mAryied!'
ssSirrs
There, there. don't be scarf I want
a wife and you want husband"
How dare your
sAnd being that's 20 Why can't Ne
ct the day and have over with7"