The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1914-03-26
LEAF eleventh..
A Heart of Gold.

"A 1SaFE OF 10iOs
AYY1F there is contagious thing
Xxi i In this world 1t is eInbarrass-
EoRSel ment | never felt anything
49, worse In all my life than
the shame that swept over me in
great hot wave when that look came
into his eyes and made me realize just
exactly what | had been saying to him.
about what. and how had said it.
stood perfectly still. shook all over like
leaf and wondered II would ever be
able to raise my eyes from the ground.
A dizzy. nauseated feeling for myself
rose up In me against myself, and !
was just about to turn on my heels and
leave him. | hoped forever. when he
came over and laid his hand on my
shoulder
Molly" he said in a voice that might
have come down from heaven on dove
wings. you can't for a moment feel or
think that | don't realize and appre-
ciate what you have been to the moth
erless little chap. and for life | am
yours ut command. as be Is. ! really
thought it would be relief to you to
have him taken away from You for just
a little while right now. and still
think 1t is hest. but not unless you con
sent. You shall have him back when
ever yon are ready for him. and at all
times both he and are at your service
to the whole of our kingdoms. Just
think the matter over. won't you. and
decide what you want me to do?"
Something In me died forever.
think. when he spoke to me like that
Hes not like other men, and there
aren't any other men on earth bnt him!
All the rest are just bugs or bats or
something worse. And I'm not any
thing myself There's no excuse for
my living. and wish / wasn't so
healthy and likely to go on doing It..
it. was all over. and there was nothing
left for me to live for. and before |
could stop myself ! buried my face il
my hands.
BILLY asked me to go with him OF
this awful whale hunt" | sobbed ou
to comfort myself with the though
that somebody did care for me. regard
less of just how | was further embar
rassing and complicating myself in th'
| affairs of the two men | had though
| l owned and was now finding out th;i
| | had to give up. | wish | had beel
| looking at him. for felt him start
| but he said in his big friendly voice
| that is so much-and never enough 70
me
| We'll. why not you and Al COM
along and make it family party. i
that is what suits Bill. the bossy
If men would just buy good. sharl
kitchen knives and cut out women
hearts In businesslike way 1t woul'
be SO much kinder of. them. Why d.
they prefer to use dull weapons th,
/ mash the life out slowly? Everythin:
Is at an end for me tonight. and tha
blow did it. 1t was horrible crue
| thing for him to say to me! know
/ now that have been in love with .Iohl
/ Moore for longer than my honor let
| body else. and that also have offere,
myself to him served up in ever
known enticement and have to be re
fused at least twice day for a yeal
A widow can't say she didn't under
stand what she WAS doing. even to hel
self. but-my humiliation is complete
and the only thing that can make m
ever hold up my head is to puzzle hir
1 by-by happily marrying Alfred Ber
nett-and quick!
OF course he must suspect how ! fee
| about him. for two people couldn't bot
be so ignorant as not to see such a.
enormous thing as my love for him IS
and | was the blind one But he mus
never. never know that ever realize
it. for he is so good that 1t would dis
way with him until. | can get ava,
: III tell him I'm sorry | was SO indis
nant tonight and say that think
will be fine for him to take my Bill
away from me with him. ! must smil
at the idea of having my very soul an
putated. insist that 1t is the only thin
to do and pack up the little soul in
steamer trunk with the smile. jus
smile. that is all Life demands smile
from woman. even If she must crns
their perfume from her own hear
and she generally has them ready.
Oh. Molly. Molly! Is it for this yo
came into the world-twice to Civ
yourself without love? What diffe
ence does 1t make that your arms al
strong and white If they can't clas
him to the softness and fragrance {
| your breast? Why are your eyes bin
pools Of love If they are not for b
questioning. and what are yonr ros
lips for If they quench not his thirst
| Yes. know God is very tender wit
n woman. and think he understand
so IL she crept very close to him an
canght Mt his sleeve to steady herse
he would be kind to her until ST
could 90 on along her own steep wa
Please. God. never let him find ont fl
it would hnrt him to have hurt me.
/ Some days are like the miracle 10,
ers that open In the garden from plan
you didn't expect to bloom at all
might have been born. lived and die
without having this one come into n
life. and now that ] have had it.
don't know how to write 1t except
!. the crimson of blood. the blue of fam
the gold Of glory, and tinge Of ligl