The Richmond palladium and sun-telegram. [volume] (Richmond, Ind.) 1907-1939, 1914-07-15
new YORK THROWS
BOMBS AS PAST|ME
FOR TRIVIAL CAUSE
Even "Joes" Selling Ice in
Apartment Houses Subject
to Attacks by Followers OF
Sport.

10 AIIdCkS ny COllOWCAo Va
Sport.
NEW YORK, July 15.-"When In
Rome do as the Romans do" When IN
New York throw bombs. That Is the
only way to keep even with the game.
A New Yorker must get acclimated 10
bombs and bomb throwing. bomb 1ac'
tories and premature bomb explosions.
You may not believe this because you
do not live in New York, but let me
remark right here that the center Oh
the bomb zone hereabouts is the mar
BILE and gilt police headquarters, home
of a thousand anti-bomb enthusiasts,
at Centre and Breome streets, anu
there Is no palace so exalted noi
home SO humble that the bomb, ike
the useless Christmas gift, Is I'm
known.
live in an elevator apartment much
better than I can afford on Washington
Heights and l congratulated myself
that the altitude was too great 1or
bombs. But ! was self-deluded.
New York apartment houses are, or
should be. celebrated for the most ex-
IRENE luxuries and the most atroclous
cruelties Of civilization on the face OF
Get leo Everywhere.
One Of the most amusing institutions
OF apartment houses is the purchase
Of ice Ice Is like chewing gum and
almond chocolate bars in Manhattan,
dispensed everywhere. Some one has
spoken of an ice trust; l could never
find this benificent institution. II 1t
is still struggling along 1t has my
moral support But all the ice could
ever locate was in the possession OF
certain Calabrians and Sicilans with
wide grins and large earnings, who
dwell in cellars and are uniformly
named joe.
The "Joes" had a monopoly Of our
apartment. There was sharp rivalry
between them, but mt never took the
for moi price-cutting. There would
come a heavy buzz at the dumb
waiter.
This is the ice-man. Any ice to-
day."
Eyes, Joe, ten cent piece"
A few minutes later another buzz
at the dumb waiter and up it would
come, a pitiful little chunk weighing
geakly back and forth on the creak-
ing dumb-waiter, and so obviously on
its last legs that one thrust it hastily
into the refrigerator for fear it might
die in transit "Ten cent piece" meant
that amount which a tenth part of a
dollar would buy at the current retail
price for ice. So the theory if one
stopped to reason. Few did that.
One shouted:
Ice With Apologies.
"Give me decent piece this time,
Joe. that last was terrible"
Then would come up fairly re-
spectacle piece with profuse Neapoli'
tan apologies, but the next day ice
would be back to it's old basis.
Then something dreadful happened.
Our superintendent-janit is now OBJ
solete-went about denouncing the
"JOes" as thieves and all the tenants
were so wrought up that they finally
consented to take ice from "Mr. John
thus the regular style Of the New
York apartment house superinten-
dents. The "Joes" were barred from
the basement where they had flourish
ed fifty-two weeks Of the year among
the feet of the dumb-waiters; and
"Mr. John started his service of ice
giving perhaps slightly fatter hunks
than did the Calabrians, but generos.
ity is characteristic of new mercan.
tile enterprises.
"Bang!"
Our dreams of being outside the
New York bomb zone were shattered
Considerable smoke was issuing from
the basement and scouting parties
told us that Mr.. Johns department
of ice was wrecked We all informed
the police. 1t was an outrage, of
course, and there was an "investiga
ton.
"Bang!"
This time in the middle of the night
Many Of the more temperamental ten
ants troop to the fire escapes in pa
jamas and what nots.
Windows in the basement positively
broken and by an Italian bomb. One
woman whispered to me with tears in
her eyes that she considered it as
much a disgrace to be plagued with
that widely disseminated human com
panion of the night season, which one
never names but frequently pursues
Just at present we are awaiting
Bomb No. g. This is bound to be a
good one, am assured by experts on
the subject.
There were in the year 1913, accord
ing to the police records, slightly
more than 100 bombs exploded ir
Greater New York. l can assure you
this is a gross underestimate. 1t does
great injustice to the latest metro
politan pasttime. Bomb throwing is
the greatest gift which the men from
Sunny Italy have brought to the West
ern World. and it should have a fail
show. Every month the police finally
crush the bomb trust, discover anC
bring into court the central factory
OF all metropolitan bomb throwers, and
arrest and extract confessions from
bomb planters by the dozen.
NOTICE OF MEETING