davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Evening star., 1914-02-08
ajesy give shrek delight an boundn firm tn throne cried
an began scoopin' up these mimintoes iv visit

as young nor as light as l was an thin
terry-built clothes iv Felsenthars didn't
hold. But what threatened to be mis-
fortune at first turned into piece iv
rare good luck F'r his majesty give a
Shrek iv delight an, boundin' firm tn
throne, cried Buttons, buttons an be-
gan scoopin' up these mimintoes iv me
visit. Firm that on 1 was perfiickly at
me aise with him, or as much so as
man can be whin his suspinders has
ceased to exercise their functions. What
kind iv sublime heyro is he? Very SIM
pie. but very dignified. He is small iv
stature an if he was a plibean he might
be called a runt but there is something
SO magnificent in his bearin', something
so piercin' in his glance, something so
majestic in his walk. that befure yo have
been in his prisince minyit ye f'rget his
achool measurements an wud not be sur
prised to hear that he Is iliven feet high.
His charakter Is well displayed in his
race. where We see sojerly ardor in TIL
low forehead balanced be dogged consar-
Vatfsm in TIL rethreatin' chin Ye can
see at glance that he was bor-rn TO
command Whin he spoke. as he did siv-
raj times durin' tn day, his penethratin'
falsetto voice made me thremble. All in
all. he is tn ableSt man far an away
that | have iver met But with it all so
simple an aisy in his manners He set
next to me at dinner, with his nurse on
tn other side. He showed er-reat NTH
rest In America. asst me was it a lake, an
seemed disappointed whin / told him /
had no Indyan blood in me veins Afther
that he was silent an listened while de-
scribed tn iniquity iv the pure food act
an told him iv tn health givin' quail
ties " benzoate iv soda in tomato ketch-
up. Afther we had been at tn table f'r
about two hours an was just startin'
seeries lv American anecdotes he sud-
denly give cry iv o. my Lord dashed
his hand again his forehead, an run
Evening star., 1914-02-08
He can't piece pie at railroad station without ad-
dhressin' a the hired help"
dhressin

him what to bid He has forty UNIFORMS,
is colonel in twinty-two Euro-peen rigi-
mints, carries a soord that has give him
a bad list to starboard. an his fav-rite
spoort is sthringin' buttons. He has th'
largest collection iv buttons i'll tn wur-
ruld. 1t is a noble SIGHT to see him
clingin to a snow white charger an re-
viewin' tn Poosylanyan ARMY, which is
almost as big as tn Father Matthew
Fife an Dhrum corps. But he has to
be watched all tn time 10 keep him fr' m
cuttin tn buttons off his UNIFORMS an
putin thin on a stirring. l made ii
great hit with him be Sindin' him me
own modest collection that I'd pried firm
tn coats " tn officers iv tn law in
Chicago while they lay asleep.
But yell want to know how tn am
bassadure is gittin' along. He's credit
to his counthry an his ancient calling.
He has done ivrything expicted iv an
American ambassadure. He has larned
to talk afther dinner at a lenth sootable
to tn best Traditions iv our diplomacy.
It's become sicond nature with him, an
he can't ate a piece iv pie at railroad
station without addhressin' 4 few rec
marks to the hired help on tn ties that
binds th two great nations together AT
a meetfn' iv tn Observation-Disclosures
Society, which was formed befure tn
exthradtion threaty was passed, he made
an Grafton that lasted firm quarther To
twelve ontil his mellow peeryods mingled
with tn tinkling iv tn bells on TIL cows
ben' dhriven to pasture bc Numbers iv.
parlymint. He said that Poosylanyans
an US were brothers. or annyhoW
cousins, that we spoke tn same dilect:
that tn same blood coorsed through our
veins.
America he said. claimed a half in
threst in their cillybrated potc. Hook
heimer, while tn wurruks iv such
Evening star., 1914-02-08
She Got the Samples.

A GDREi Was Thirteen. but a big eirl
for her age. Yet she was still i
child in her absorbing taste for sweets
Not far from her horn. iii. food show
which is held annually IN Washineto-l.
was going on, and the idea that there Were
pounds Of cakes. jeilies and chocoigta =
all ready To be eaten occupied her rni,l
every morning rs She vcnded her way
10 school past the building This pr
occupation Of thought resulted ii gr ~
nletic ii which four quarts equ.,ieG on,
yard. and Napoieon crossed th.. Rubiooil
on the ice in history lessons. Rut Aud
rey modern girl, and soon fouI4G
a way out Of her trouble
Saturday she decided 10 put her plan
into execution. Mother had gone to
work II tn. Treasury. and Audrey was
monarch OF al she surveyed literally
She could not get ii.,o thu food show
without beng accompanied by an adult
Now. adults in such cases being regard
ed as necessary evils. the girl deterinin-
ed to be on, herself Tor the occasion.
Down at the - cent store she bought
q diamond ring and a smaller one OF
plain gold. Then she hied home. array
ed herself in her mothers best suit put
on a picture hat with a big Heil- and went
to the food show. The doorkeeper pass
ed her in unnoticed in the crowd Of
others streaming in. for the nerr. seem
ed that Of short woman. Inside. Aud
rey did her duty. There was not II hi
OF food in fh.. house sh. did not sample.
nor = cake nor ANDY of which she did
not bring aNaS specimens. When She
Went home she Was on..of The fullest
and happiest children in Washington.
And yet men talk about womans 5 lack
of inventive power.
Evening star., 1914-02-08

amy kind iv gymnastics that is Gus
tomary in showin' respict f'r his maj
esty so long as ! amt asked TO ,,e 40
worried about. This here fellow tells me
l will have to wear me dhress suit at
wan o'clock in tn afternoon. Dye
s'pose that's right? I wondher is that
oil man thryin' to kid me. l wisht ye'd
go out an see somebody an find out f'r
me-" he says So l wint over to the
Eyetalyan legation an found a frind iv
mine that I've been larnin' mocheeka;
is this on tn leyel?" says /, 1T is.
have to hang on himsilf IL he don't ex-
pict to be shot be a sinthry at tn gate"
But" says 1. "he says he'll be ashamed
iv himsilf." That's tn way an Amer
lean ambassadure ought to feel in tn
tn part" says Luigi. So We put him In
tn first part clothes an started him off
fr tn palace. He come back three times
befure he left FIR good. ARE ye sure
IT'S what ye've got to wear says L.
Well" says he, ''I'll have to take ye'er
wurrud FIR it. but If ye're maxim joke
iv me I'll have ye both coort martialed-
minyut l expict some wan to rap on
plate with a knife an sind me fr a
cheese sandwich" he says.
But whin he come back he was a
changed man. well, Pickles. says l.
''Ye'er ixcillincy, Misther Sicrety, if ye
Place says he. "Ye'er ixcllincy," says
1. How did ye'er ixcillincy like his mai
esty?" says ]. "a wonderful charak-
ter says he. He was settin' on th'
throne whin l entered. / did me re-
spictful crouch as directed, but am not
Evening star., 1914-02-08

was a gathering place fer the most bril-
liant people and his hospitality Il by
word for those fortunate enough to be
his friends. And because Springfield was
1.incoins home and also hecause the
times were troublesome politics and Lin
coin formed the chief topics of conversa-
ton at the dinner table and social gath
er!ngs- Consequently. although never
having known Lincoln intimately. Miss
Macdonald heard all of the gossip, ru-
Inors and runlors OF rumors which We're
current at that time and is in a position
to cast many sidelightS upon conditions
of that time But most interesting among
the incidents which happened nifty years
ago is that relating to Gen. Singleton
trips through the south. made at Lin
coins request
My uncle said Miss Macdonald took
no active military part in the war be-
tween the north and south. Gov. Yates
OF Illinois offered him the coionelcy of
a regiment of ten companies of cavalry,
but this he refused. Loyal to the Union.
he nevertheless had n deep sympathy for
the south-a sympathy. moreover. which
he felt at liberty TO express. And II was
this sympathy and understanding in
gard to the southern cause which made
Lincoln choose him as an unofficial peace
arbiter. despite the fact that many of his
speeches brought forth protest from
northern advocates.
Although Gen. Singleton had known
President Lincoln many years before.
this particular incident begins early in
January, 1865, lust after Sherman's
march To the sea had been terminated
and many persons thought that the war
was nearing its end
President Lincoln wrote my uncle
through o. II Browning, that he wished
to see him. When Gen. Singleton saw the
President. Lincoln asked his opinion re-
garding the situation in the south. the
feelings of the southern leaders and the
peace. Gen. Singleton replied that the
war could be ended il the southern peo-
pie We're correctly informed to the
real conditions in the north. My uncle
believed that the south was entertaining
false hopes, originated by democrats
north OF the Ohio river. and that could
these be dispeled an anicable agreement
might be reached
Il have my uncie's own account OF the
Presidents reply. He said: Singleton. l
want to have full and frank talk with
you concerning all these affairs. 1t has
occurred to me that If there is anybody
IN the country who can have any in
fuence on those people and bring about
any good. YOU are the man. They must
have confidence in you: you have been
as much their friend as il was possible
for YOU to be and vet be loyal to the
government under which you live think
this Notwithstanding your speeches. for
Evening star., 1914-02-08

one Of which ! have been advised to ar
rest you l had much rather You had
not felt as your speeches seemed to show
YOU felt. but cannot say that you sad
anything which you had not the right to
say, You have said more about me than
anybody else. and in view of this l as
sured those people who wished you ar
rested that if could stand it they ought
TO find no fault
TO this Gen. Singleton said that what
ever might be their political differences.
he would never say an unkind personal
thing of him. but that he regarded his
administration an entirely proper sub
ject for criticism.
President Lincoln then went on to tell
my uncle of his desire to bring about the
end of the war. He said he realized
that he could not send any one officially,
but that as a private citizen Gen. Single
ton should be able to accomplish much.
Ny uncle replied that it would be the
proudest effort of his career to attempt
this mission of peace. Agents of the
north, he said. were assuring the south
ern leaders that the north was tired of
the struggle and was the eve of a
revolt, which could bring about repudia-
ton of the war 1t was this false hope.
he told the President, that must be shat
tered
AT Gen. Siugleton's request. Lincoln
wrote a letter which In substance stated
that if Virginia. any of the other
ceded states would recognize the author
ity OF the United States and elect sem
ators and representatives, such senators
and members would be entitled to take
their places. This the President was
particularly anxious to bring about. in
order that the southern delegation might
aid in somewhat conteracting the eA-
treme measures of the radical majority
in Congress. to which he was opposed.
The letter written, my uncle asked
President Lincoln what he should answer
We're the people of the south to ask how
that letter and his emancipation procla-
nation could stand side by side And
the reply came:
" ! have issued that proclamation. and
if 1t have any legal effect ] have no
power to recall it. ii it have not any
legal effect il is of no consequence l
would not take it back if | could. and
could not if l would.
This statement my uncle took to mean
that higher tribunal existed. the judici
AIRY, TO which the proclamation could be
referred regarded its legality, which
might or might not restore the slaves
to the south.
Gen. Singleton made four visits to
Richmond. On the first, January, 1865,
Evening star., 1914-02-08

has many times told of al incident which
shows the tension under which Tie city
vas Al the time. In company with Soy
eral friends. Gen Singleton that safue
evening went from place I" place eie41-
ing particulars of lh. Fatal shQoti;s
Later they entered restaurant som
it was 2.:sp. \ chorus immediately start
ed: tn" clock must h.. fast II could NOT
POSSIBLY be 50 late But upon ,NamiriiJs
their watches every ono found t.ir yIo.,
TO be correct. YET my uncle has often
said had ! been on oath a. To IN. iinI-
when we entered the place without sav-
ing seen the clock | should haze sworn
without the slightest hesitation that il
was not later than II O'Clock The hours
had been concentrated by the Tremendous
pressure Of the events Of the evening.
Evening star., 1914-02-08

kind iv pants to wear at diff parties.
tow him out " the rile prisince whin his
majesty becomes restless, kick him in tn
ankle whin he frgets tn polite use iv tn
knife. an gin nrally to attind to all thin
important little "details that cemtnts
frindships between tn powers an pre-
vints wars. Hello" says Pickles whin
he see tn la-ad with a soord at his side
comes tn king. / had no idee his majesty
wud be so prompt Show him in. an
do We run up an tell Augustus to slip
on something an come down an see him., .
he says: That is not tn king. ye'er tx
cillincy,'' says OIL Etiket That's wan
Nv his ekerries come to invite We to tn
palace" he says Well" says Pickles.
Il s'pose I'll have to go, although it
grieves me dimmycratic soul to be asso-
cyatin' with such relics iv barbarism,"
he says.
THAT night he took me aside an says
he: Tommy" he says. Tets f'rget
about ye'er ixcillincy an Misther Sicrety
an talk as we used to befure We left
Gawd's own country" he says. "All
right Pickles. says I. He shuddered a
little, but wint on. "Ye are a smart fell
low" he says. ''an' I'd like ye to find out
something FIR me. That old Manual iv
Table Manners at tn embassy has been
telln' me what I've got to do tomorrah.
He says whin i enter TIL kings prisince 1
must dhrop to me knees at th' wurrud
Charge Whin told 1 can get up l must
advance on tn right foot, maxim three
bows to tn right an three to tn left an
eight in front till / arrive at tn throne,
wbin 1 can let down me left leg again.
Well, that's all right A certain amount
iv RESPECT Is joo to tn sovereign iv a
friendly power an I'm not tn kind that
believes in fiauntin' tn American flag in
Evening star., 1914-02-08

would result from the conference | would
not he willing to undergo the pain ano
humiliation which otherwise would Ger
tainly result
This conversation Gen. Singleton re-
ported to Gen. Grant, asking him to place
the matter before the President. and
Lincoln when told of the affair expressed
his desire to bring about the conference
AS result, when Gen. Singleton made his
third trip to Richmond. in February, 1862
he carried n letter from Gen. Grant 70
Gen. Lee. and to this Gen. Lee wrote q
letter, sent under "a flag of truce, con-
senting to the interview. But Secretary
Stanton forbade the meeting. saying II
was by order of the President. This.
however, was later emphatically denied
by Lincoln.
''On still another visit to the southern
capital Gen. Singleton met numerous
members of the Virginia Legislature. To
these he recommended that when Gen.
Lee should be driven from Virginia they
should convene the legislature. repeal ths
ordinance of secession. take the oath pre-
scribed by the Constitution ana send the
record to Mr.. Lincoln. To this they as
sented. and Gen. Singleton told the Presl-
dent of these facts and Lincoln was much
pleased
THE trip which my uncle never made
to Richmond would have been the fifth.
Gen. Singleton went next day to have d
final talk with the President. 1t was al
this time that Lincoln told him TO assure
the people of Virginia that he would ia
yor the return of the state into the Union
with her government intact. sending a
similar message to all the other seeded
states.
Gen. Singleton told Lincoln that Gen.
WeitzeI was then in command i'll kif
ginia, and that when the Virginia legis-
lature had attempted to follow out his
previous advice the local commander
had forbidden It, He also complained 10
Mr.. Lincoln that the assurances which
had been made 10 Virginia had not been
carried out. Lincoln replied:
I cannot do everything at once. for
am impeded by the fact that everything
is under martial law at the present time.
wish you to go again immediately 10
Richmond and assure the people.
Secretary Usher VAS present at this
conversation. and upon its close the two
men left. But short time later thar
evening they were on their way to find
Gov Yates OF Illinois for the purpose of
making a party for supper. and while
on their way heard OF the tragedy Just
enacted at F'ords Theater- The last con-
versat!on the President had with my
uncle was one of peace and mercy.
In recalling the events which We're
crowded into the hours Immediately fol-
lowing Lincoins assassination. my uncle
Evening star., 1914-02-08

Wynzeyzky an Phutch We're read as
eagerly in loway as in tn land iv their
birth. He gloried in TIL fact that George
lum SulZer were iv Poosylanyan ex-
thraction. He said it was too early "a
Voice: Its half past four an laughter)
to discuss a threaty which he was ar
rangin, but he hoped in few days to
announce that Poosylanya wud remove
tn jooty on our pickalilly an we wud
let i'll their smeerkase free. Whln that
er-reat charter, that pact iv peace. is
completed, he says, TIL two pow'rful
nations will march hand in ha<ld an
arm in ar-rm an cheek be jowl, spred
in gloryous example iv brotherhood
throughout tn wurruld an DARN tn
jealous powers to come on.
Here he stopped to weep. 1t is Won
dherfUi how quick he has adopted tn
American diplomatic custom iv weepin.
I've seen him mix horseradish without
showin' tn Taste emotion, but now he
can't mintion tn frindship between our
out sobbin' as though his heart wud
break
There's ony wan thing that bothers
his ixcillincy, an that's his harness. AS
ye might say, it's th' on'y fly in his vim
esar. Befure he come over here he took
tn advice iv tn sicrety iv state an
bought himsilf swallowtail suit firm
Fesenthars. thinkin' he'd on'y have to
wear it afther dark. But tn other day
a fellow come up to tn house dhressed
like a dhrum major. There's an old as
sistant screty who's been here FIR forty
years. His jooty is to take tn raw ma
teeryal as it's handed to him on th' hoof.
teach him how to act, how nanny genu-
fieXions TO make befure tn king, what
Evening star., 1914-02-08
Buttons, buttons

weight to be two hunderd pounds
Gr-reat vivacity is lent to her face lie
her eyes, which ar-re slightly crossed
She has the simplest manners possible.
but there is something about her.
can't say just what. but an ondeiinabl'.
something. that marks her as iv rii"
blood She threated me at wanst as an
al.el whin she harmed that | am de-
scinded firm Hugh oNcil on M
mothers side an cud wear tn title ty
earl If i wanted TO. But if a piece comes
out in tn pa-aptrs sayin' that there is
anything seeryous between US plaZe
deny il. We ARE jusl good frinds.
nawthin' more. | viii write more
anon. In tn manet:nle. Cher Miguel
with renewed assurances iv me most
distinguished considheration, believe
ME,
THOMAS o'NEIL SIANiN.
Late Captain. flibernian II fies.
:. .Screty iv til Embassy II tn nit'd
States iv America 10 til Coort iv H.
J. NJ Charleyfnafge III Eorty-fifth
~ Popsylanya'
80 there ye ARE" said Mr. Dool.y.
Well il is FIR this counthrS that We
ar-re so splendidly riprisinir,i abroad.
We set ri homo lightly sthrugSin f-r
food while these hardy ENJOYS y our
civilization arr. brea Kin their backs
howin' befure throne in cur behalf
or rdin In tn pitilesS glare iy tn noon
day sun in clothes that no man wu4
wear he starlight if he didnt have 70.
They stay abroad till theY ar brok''
an thin come nome an lind thar m
office they really wanted is permanent
~ occupied"
This here pa-aper." said Nr Hen
messy, SAYS We ought to have thrainet
Il don't know. SAID Mr. Dooley
.'Thrained diplomats is liable TO over
thrain. an whin IN time comes to put
wan over they lack tn punch.
Copyright. 1914. by Finley PETER punne,
Evening star., 1914-02-08

motives of Lincoln and believed that
peace could be secured with honor But
Mr. Davis remained firm in the impress
sion that the north was not a unit and
would shortly be torn asunder. He also
believed it was weakened financially
This argument my uncle refuted by say
ing:
Mr.. Davis. you are seriously wrong
in this conclusion, and if you will select
three men and permit them to go north
] will assure them safe conduct, and
they can investigate and report the feel
ing in and the condition of the north.
You are now fighting. not only the entire
north. but the whole world. whose re-
sources are being employed for your sub
jugation. There is no lack of men in that
section: every dry goods box Is covered
with idlers, and the signs of prosperity
were never more promising than at the
present time
Mr.. Davis declined, however, to send
the agents and Gen. Singleton returned
to Washington. He reported to Lincoln
I have not brought back peace in a lump
from the conference. but 1 am glad I
went down and hope for good results.
'On another of his trips to Richmond
Gen. Singleton spent the night at the
headquarters of Gen. Grant. and an in
cident occurred which l think is worthy
of relating. Grant asked my uncle If
he knew Gen Lee, to which Cen
since his boyhood Then Gen. Grant
said: i remember Lee well. but do not
know whether or not he remembers me.
1 believe il l could meet him this thing
could be ended. l should be perfectly
satisfied to have Gen Lee come here to
my headquarters and I would guarantee
that he should receive complete pro-
lection. When my uncle left next morn
ing he asked Gen. Grant If he would be
willing to have the conversation repeated
to Gen. Lee. and Grant said he wished 1t
might be told him fully.
Gen. Lee was in the habit of going to
Richmond each Sunday to attend church.
and II one such occasion that
Gen. Singleton met him. My uncle told
him of his conversation with Gen. Grant
to which the southern leader replied: 1t
would give me great pleasure if | could
indulge the hope of realizing what Grant
suggests to the results of an inter
view. l would be willing to make almost
any sacrifice to secure the end of the
unfortunate conflict, but it would be eX-
tremely painful for me, to so and meet
Grant and my old comrades and then re
turn without anything having been ac-
complished. Unless there could be a
guarantee that some permanent good
Evening star., 1914-02-08

screamin' fr tn room. ] presoom that
something had said had suggested So
luton iv some gr-reat QUESTION iv state
an he hurried away to put tn idee in
writin while it was still fresh Amy
how I waited till quarther to sivinf'r
him to come down. an thin accepted an
invitation firm tn ginral iv tn ARMY TO
go out an take a walk in TIL air.
"'"Yes. sir, Charleymange TIL Forty
fifth will go down to histhry as p'raps tn
greatest monarch iv tn present eera. Ye
know what a rugged dimmycrat l have
always been. 1 have not changed me
creed. As tn pote says. l was nachral-
lied in old Wisconsin, an firm her rug
ged breast sucked in TIL tyrant hatin
milk that will not let me rest. But since
seem Charleymange 1 view monarchs in
a diff'rent light. Much can be said in
tackin' pickle business in America /
wudden't be surprised if it wud become
nicissary FIR people iv our class to get to-
gether an choose a king. Whin that day
comes 1 cud wish f'r no betther fate FIR
our country thin to be ruled over he tn
great parsonage who this very day. just
as tn clock sthruck ., passed the butther
to me with his own august hands" he
says.
so ye see he amt much imprissed
be rilety. He's on'y stunned. As FIR
me, all this flummery wearies me- ] wud
be very homesick but FIR tn. kindness iv
her rile highness tn Princess Hildy-
garde Sophy Annamariar who is Farm
IN TIL Vicksburg lope firm me AS ye
know she is tn most beautiful woman
in Europe. Her hair is light sandy
in color, an although short, like all
her family. she is so gracefully proper
toned that no wan wud SUSPECT her
Evening star., 1914-02-08
HEN. April II

fkNt April ~.
1856. the news ran
through Washing
TIM that Lincoln
has been shot,
Two men We're on
their way to sup
per whose future
movements We're
completely changed
Is d result of that
fatal pistol dis
charge.