El Paso herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1901-1931, 1914-10-31
OF lad is azn: anything between Have
Have a

! with their hands over their mouths an
their cheeks lOOzin' like so many toy
balloons in a minylr they're all on
their feet. tn OF woman an tn bride
iv tn family ARE Wondhrln' what fit
iv timpry insanity injOoced III best
PROFESSIONAL pitcher on tn South
Side TO throw himself away on such a
well well. welli I had no idee there
was annythin' 'etWeen ye-'
VIII Be Far Different
But it viii be far different whin
science steps in an takes charge tn
idee " these fellows. Hinnissy. is that
we inherit tn defects " our parents.
It's as il ye set down an wrote out q
will To me udest son, Pacly. I give
an beQueath me game leg TO ne sec
oud son, Malachy, I lave tn two missin'
teeth in me lower jaw; 10 ne daughter.
HonOrya, lave a lie inth'rest in tn
Squint iT me left eye, tn principal 20
be divided at her death among her sur
vlvin' childher.' an so on In tn coorse
cursed with hundreds iv Wan-legged.
blind an toOthless Hinnissies. fr tits IN
theery iv these careful observers that
while ye have On'y lost two teeth ye' er
gran childher will have no teeth at all
They're going 10 prevint such q
cdlamlLy De seem that people ARE
properly mated accOrdin' TO tn prin-
ciples that has made prunes so much
ago. Wen suppose our frind Jimmy
Clancy has done his flop an poured
out tn usual flOd iv golden ilOquence.
Tn woman don't bust into tears an
say oh, Jimmy. ARE ye sure it's
ra-aly me yen be Wantiu2 No. sir.
she says bashfully- But. Tim. We
haven't showed me ye'er card FIRM tn
eugeenic hOord.+ He prof. tn GER
tyficaIe firm his inside pocket, they
INSPECT IL undher tn dim lamp light.
an thin they take holt That much
is all right But to-m1rrah m0rniu
they must 90 downtown an get their
license fr'm the bOorL
They get off at tn city hall an
make their way 10 tn third tlure
where tn eugeenic boord is settin-
II is a tur-rble scene The ar is filled
with shrieks and groans- Sturdy po-
lisemen ar-re breakin' III las fond
clutches iv condimned couples, yuIng
women are faintin' an young gintle-
men who refuse TO be comfort7d ere
bein' slugged by tn Officers " III law
Ivry fey minyits out iv tn bOord rooms
cordin' to tn rules iv euEeenics- They
ARE handcuffed- Tn happy groom IS
not speakin' 70 tn blushin bride. an
she is thryin' to get at him with
hatpin-
'FinIly tn time comes # our frinds.
They stand up at th' head iv tn ia
bic. an wan iV tn new Numbers iv IN
boord whispers 10 his neigh5or, Be
CORY. it's a handsome couple they
make Tn clerk goes over tn records
an finds they've been examined an
found sound in wind an limb. an is
about 10 sign tn license Whin tn chair
man iv the boOrd says
Hold on This viii niver 90. r.
bid tn banns'
What's tn matther." says the clerk
Why says tn chairman. don't ys
see they're both blonds2 Their childher
wud be albinOs. Sind # that Mexican
woman in cage five. She's lust tn mate
fr this la-ad- I've had Wurrud FIRM
tn 5 ciety iv Eugeenics in Wash'in'tOn
that III presidint is alarmed at III de-
creased yield " brown haired childher
in this district he says.
Did ye liver hear iv two people
maxim a eugeenic marredge2" asked
Mr.. Hennessy.
I did" said Mr.. Dooley. 'but they
got a eugeenic divorce