Gilpin observer., 1914-10-15


to the spot and nothing indicated .
strike for shorter hours as they start
ed OF. They had wandered along for
a distance Of IL feet and three or four
inches. and the deacon was saying to
himself that he who controlled his
own temper was greater than the Jaw
bone Of an ass. when there was
third rush. This time 1t was straight
ahead and the full length of the gar
den, and as the plowman sought to
keep fast hold he was flung this way
and that, and finally found himself
tangled up with an old strawberry
bed.
Now, by the horn spoon Of the
horned jackass, but this is too much
too much" he shouted as he scram-
bled up and found a club
rs 1t thunder after all. deacon? ?"
sweetly inquired the widow, as she
appeared in the kitchen door.
Yes, it's thunder and lightning,
tool" he almost shouted, as he moist
ened his hands to get grip on the
club.
What is it-what are you going
to do?"
The deacon didn't answer He
wanted all his breath for what was
about to happen. He gripped the club
and made for the oxen, and for ten
minutes there was a circus In town
with free admission. He pounded and
swatted and batted, and as the club
rose and fell he brought out reserve
stock of the English language to take
the cake over anything Farmer John
son had ever thought of.
Deacon Shortwell, l wouldn't a.
believed 1t, not If the minister had
told me so himself"
II don't care durn whether you
would or not!" he hoarsely replied.
"Oh, you don't. eh2 Well. you've
let the cat out of the bag at last.
Deacon, you are cruel-hearted man,
and you swear like a pirate I can
never, never marry such man"
Nobody has asked you to. Durn
their hides, but I'd like to murder
'em,"
More cruelty! More cussing!
thought there might be something
hidden under that soft, sleek way of
yours. Oxen amt exactly women, and
wives amt exactly oxen, but a man
who will cuss and pound his oxen will
naturally"
"Mebbe you'd like to try 'em your
self" interrupted the deacon. as .
brilliant thought came to him.
Il would. have never, driven oxen
in my life, but I know l can do bet
hn
then, haw Buck-gee Bright. See
there! AS soon as they find out that
nobody is going to break their ribs
or cuss them blind they are as docile
as cats You hold the plow and I'll
drive"
Five minutes later the furrow had
been extended four feet more. and the
plow point was getting ready to rip
up the soil in the good old way when
the oxen fourished their tails and
bolted. The deacon went whirling at
widow was game, and she raced along
with the boilers and put the whip
over their noses. She might possibly
have stopped them before they got
over the county line but for an acci-
dent. Oxen and woman struck and
overturned beehive in their mad
career, and the 10000 bees loaflng
around came up to the scratch in the
promptest and most cheerful manner.
The deacon witnessed the beginning
of the scrap. and even waited until q
stray bee had lifted his heels OF the
ground for humanity's sake, but then
he fed, and II was two days later
that he knew that the widow had 81
Jumps on her body and was doing as
we'll as could be expected, and that
the oxen had been heard of 40 miles
away and still on the run.
Deacon" began the widow, as he
made his appearance in response to
her message, Il believe you cussed
them oxen the other day"
II guess I did" he rather sheep
ishly replied,
But 1t was for yourself. deacon.
now wish you to cuss 'em for mo.
You also dubbed 'em until you was
tired out. Can't you club 'em some
more?"
And you ain't-ain't mad at me!"
he asked. as a look of relief came to
his face.
la, no-not q mite"
And I amt cruel-hearted nor q
hypocrite and pirate?"
mo. deacon. On the contrary, you
are one OF the best men on earth. or
will be after you have bought them
oxen and peeled their pesky hides
or"
"And about-about-?" stammered
the deacon.
"About our getting married? Well.
Samuel. you can fix the date to suit
yourself. and | will be there"
Copyright. 1918. by the Mcclure News
paper Syndicate.)