The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1914-05-31
A CRISIS IN YRESRUN LAND.
How Chief Nosiiw Ayerted a Menace 20
the yticauuOI.

the yticsuaol.
Never was the political genius of the
fresrunians better exhibited than in an
incident threatening the very existence
or the yticauqol which occurred in tn,
days when Nosliw was in power.
For number OF years a few Yres-
runians Of criminal instincts, neglect.
Ing the paramount duties Of speech
making and meddling. had worked with
criminal energy and effectiveness or
their own concerns, until they had
achieved material success to a degree
abhorrent to all right thinking members
OF the yticauaol.
These creatures, dead TO every con-
sideration OF the public veal. were cut
off by the exigencies of their eccentrici-
ties from association with normal
Yresrunians and dwelt in close intimacy
with others OF their own malformed and
| imperfect kind. In the course of years.
through the operation Of the common
dangers to which they were exposed.
their intercourse led to the formation
Of societies among them. known as
snoitaroproc, to which none but those
sunk in industry and thrift could
gain admission.
The abnormality Of the snoitaroproc
and of the individuals who composed
them at first protected them from at
tack the most laxative and meddle-
some Yresrunians not for a moment
believing that such unnatural customs
as they fostered could constitute a
really serious menace to the yticauqol,
which seemed to be constantly growing
richer and stronger In flowers of
rhetoric and all the other resources that
guard and protect the Yresrunians and
their institutions.
But some years before NosIiw earned
the headship OF the yticauqol the wiser
men among the Yresrunians recognized
that the snoitaroproc were exertlng a
most unhealthful influence, encouraging
economy among the young of the race,
rendering barren many tongues that
might produce words. and exerting a
strong influence against the essential
national virtue of attending to other
folks affairs.
No sooner had the vicious influence OF
the snoitaroproc been discovered than
the whole conversational power of the
Nresrunian people was eXerted against
them. Resort was had also to the
charms known as setutats. reckoned the
most powerful agencies for good known
in a yticaudol. many OF which were
prescribed, with solemn ritualistic in
carnations and appropriate addresses,
against the snoitaroproc.
To the amazement of the Yresrunians
the snoitaroproC continued to exist,
despite every effort to extirpate them,
and when Ncsliw came into power
Yresrun was filled with them.
Nosllw was magnificently equipped
by nature and experience to attack the
snoitaroproc. From his lips splendid
words fell. without interruption. on all
subjects. He promptly proposed to the
Yresrunians a new charm. consisting OF
n series of setutats. which would abso-
lutely prohibit the existence Of snoita-
roproc of any kind for any purpose, at
any time in any part ofYresrun. Nosliw
popularized the famous slogan
"LANosREP SIT LUG"
which inspired in all good Yresrunians
the hope that their jails and prisons
would soon be ridiculously inadequate to
the demands made on them.
The setutats put forth by Nosliw
commanded the instant lip service of
every Yresrunlan, except those affiliated
with the snoitaroproc. for almost a quar-
ter Of an eight hour day. Then fear
some word was passed. 1t was dis
covered that not only would these setu-
tats drive out of Yresrun the snoitarop-
roc composed Of defective Yresrunians
guilty of minding their own business
and occasionally keeping their mouths
shut but that they would also endanger
many organizations formed and main
tanned by incessant meddlers and IA
nous Conversatioralists fer the speci-
fic purpose of discussing and managing
the affairs OF other Yresrunians. and
the people of other nations.
notably garrulous Yresrunian.
Srepmog by name. denounced the setu-
tats in a wonderful speech. threatening
to do great injury to Nosliw II he per-
sisted in defending them. Srepmog's
voice was powerful and far reaching.
and Nosliw was disturbed lest It should
decrease his own popularity among
Yresrunians OF the better class.
In this great danger the marvellous
ingenuity OF the Yresrunian people. find-
ing its highest expression in Nosliw,
was displayed After much conversa-
ton. public and private. he announced
that he had changed the setutats so
that they should injure only such
snoitaroproc as minded their own busi-
ness and discouraged the art Of vocal
utterance while encouraging all snoit-
aroproc designed to interfere In other
peoples business. promote speech maxi
ing. further the sacred practice OF med
ding. Thus amended, Nosliw pointed
out, the setutats could produce votes on
the setutats could produce votes on
election day.
Thus Nosliw averted great crisis,
placated Srepmog, gave a splendid i'm
petus to the calling Of the meddlers,
and proved once more, as millions OF
Yresrunians were proud to testify. that
no emergency could be too difficult and
dangerous to be overcome by really
patriotic and devoted Yresrunian.
On the brotherhood OF Man.