Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1914-02-05
HERE AND THERE

/ proof against Llune tuu give tuiS i'OOu
family many pleasant, reflections to
brighten their new farm home In far
away Minnesota for which they will
soon depart in binding shower OF
J good wishes
The Blunders of a Bashful Man
AS the Fates would have 1t, his feet
became entangled in the lines. He
made a desperate effort to free them
and did free them, but not in time to
save himself He was so inclined
when his feet hit the porch that he
lurched violently forward. His heavy
shoulders struck the door, which flew
open and let him fall with his head
and shoulders inside. The audience
WAS engaged in singing a song at the
ttime. Only those near the door no
/ tiCed the disturbance, We outside
roaTed with laughter. My chum leap.
ed quickly to his feet, closed tie door
and proceeded to assist his lady to
alight, then went to tie his team. She
| true little darling, waited patiently
| for him to return and escors her t
"a seat. While he was disposing OF
| his team, | slipped inside and wa
standing by the stove, when he anG
his lady entered The seats were all
occupied. Nevertheless, he started
! forward along the row of seats. Hal
way to the front, his lady dropped in
to a seat beside a lady friend, who
crowded over and becKoned for hCl
to sit down. He kept brayely on I'M
til the preacher, thinking that my
chum would run into him, began tC
back of. At the edge of the low
platform, my chum stopped, wheeled
about and faced the audience, every.
one of which was now watching him
Lo! his girl was missing, This con-
fused him. Completely bafled, Ii
started for the rear, evidently with the
intention of leaving the room, fOI
he charged straight for the door
and was Just reaching for the knob
couples came stringing in. In order
when the door swung in and three
to give the new arrivals room to en-
ter, my chum was compelled to bach
away from the door. In doing so, he
backed over Farmer Ms big fee
which, With overshoes on, were thrust
out from the seats. He tried to re
cover his balance, but failed. After
three steps backward, he sat dowL
with a deafening crash, square on tot
of the coal hOd. Here he got separa
ted from his cap, which one of the
passing couples hit with their fee
and brushed it under a seat occupied
by three giggling girls. He seemed
to Immediately abandon, the idea O.
recovering his cap, as II would no
at all do for him to go digging arouC
under that seat for his cap. At this
! iunCtuTe the preacher plainly saw
that he would have to do something
with my chum, else he would break
up the meeting, as nearly everyone
was now laughing at the comical seX.
hibition. The preacher hurriedly
cleared the small boys from the bench
seat behind the desk-pulpit and seat
ed them on the edge of the platform.
| then courteously usheredD the three
couples and my chum to the bench
seat. There my chum sat for on"
hour and a half with his overc0at on
sweating blood, no doubt. He seemed
not to give the sermon any attention.
whatever, excepting once, when the
preacher lemphatically, said that the
way to happiness was through long
suffering. Here he shifted his fee
into a new position, sighed and looked
over at his girl When meeting, closed
he recovered his cap, said something
in an undertone to his girl and went
| for his team-
But when he got there
The cupboard was bare,
So the poor dog got none.
The team, was gone. No place could
he find it. When he communicated
the distressing fact to his girl she
said, Well that's funny. But, never
mind, if ii is all right with you, I'll
go home with my sister and the other
fellow" He consented and she went
After they had gone, one of the small
err boys came up to my chum- and
said, Some of the boys tied your
team across, the road behind the ma
pie grove, when the wind sprung VI
from the north, so they'd be in a
warm place" My chum said moth
ing, but went quietly and got his
team and drove back home, neglect
ing to thank the boys for their kind
ness.
Your first guess will be that my
'chum and this girl never got married.
Well, my friend, you have one more
guess. After long dove-like wooing
they were happily welded. The fruits
of that happy union was a flock of
modest little boys and girls. My
chum was very bashful. His girl was
not the least bit bashful. The child
rem struck that happy medium Mod
esty. Bashfulness is fault. Modes
ty is virtue. So we see that the
union was eugenic in every respect.
The Sam White family is living
under fine new shingle roof.
Mrs. Marsh McNutt went to Extra to
see her mother, Mrs. l.. Bradley, who
is very i'll.
A snow storm on its way to the
east Saturday, switched us in the
face with its feathery toll
Frank Sunberg's sale successfully
stemmed the storm and landed a car
go OF more than four thousand.
There was no school at Sunny Side
Monday, because of the indisposition
OF the teacher, Miss Ethel Grey.
The program and box supper, under
the auspices of Miss Bertha Brandt
in the Hamlin school house, Was
splendid entertainment
Mr.. Fosbroke, a very pleasant gem
tleman of st. Paul, Minnesota, was
guest in the X. ]. Petersen home for
few days during which the ultimate
details in the Clint Rucker land deal
were adjusted.
Willie Blake was shocked a few
days since, while walking through
his stalk field, when he came upon
his best driving horse lying stiff in
death with no evidence of violence or
disease. 1t brings to mind that crazy
Elk orn fiend.
Mr.. and Mrs. James McNutt of Girls
void, accompanied by their daughter,
Glendale, came in on Saturdays noon
train, paused while in Audubon 10
chat with old friends, then passed on