New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1914-02-01
BY SEWELL FORD

some woman chance 10 train him ~ trail around 10
social stunts. Not him He amt takn' any risks Of
bcin' disturbed in bis slow-movin' habits. From bis
rooms 10 DIS club and back again % bis rooms. that's
Biycns' grand daily tour week IN and week out,
mcr and winter, with now and then great excursion
rs far east as some Fourth-ave. auction room. and
tendn' out on first nights Of musical comedies just
billiards and slhouettcs and kcepin himself fed and
shaved and tailored and maniclrcd. Say, DO you Won
der Mr. Robert wanted 20 duck
don't even take the trouble 20 dope ont any plot
for stecrn him off, bat just depends on Whatever fool
scheme comes into my head Course, he's a.c alaal
is missin his dates with Mr. Robert. So when I'VE
O'Clock strikes and an the Office force streams ou' I'n
still left there %atin patient behind The brass ra,
snappin elastic bands no The cup ON The spring water
bottle And, say, when il comes 20 that kind q harp
shootin, I'm no cellar Champion, believe me.
i was Just lookn' for % new mark when the Waitin'
room door opens, and in comes Mr. Bivcns. one q
these heavy stodgy miidlcagcd ginks, Jerry N thick
est through The shoulders, with his head 500 WeI
down between EN-. He has % pasty, dtad-Hute CONE
plcxion with wide white path unnin' over as dome,
dcad-baok hair at the sidcs and bis big, sleepy eyes
are a dull black too. don't know MS eyer saw c.-
cumber grown in q subbascment; but somehow THAT'S
what Bivons reminds me Of
THOPE, he begins, removin his silk III and mopr.a'
the white path nervous shat Robert hasn't
Yep, saysI ~Nearan hour ago. Said heU sorry
he couldn't wait.
Mr. Bivens stares at me stupid. ~Yol you .g a.'s
gone" says be.
mods. What's the wastn' breath.
Really, that's too bad, says DE. ~but 5a, perhaps
! might find him at home,
"Mght, says ], ~unless De had an orr ie i.-. 70
fill"
This brings gawp from Bivcns. That's .o- rs
he, almost in groan. Dining out! II hadn't:
thought Of that
Course, says J, "he didn't say"
~oh, but very likely he IS says Bivcns. -Heae
often does, you know. But tonight well I'm 1-,
don't know what ! can TO-.
kind Of ptcs the poor boob SO ! asks casual,
Anything could help YOU out on
He jumps at it eager. ~Oh, would you, ,ay. ae.
You see, don't want TO 60 there alone. II dom;
know what It an means.
Listens mysterious, says l. ~Where is it you lor:
want 90 60 alone"
VIM 20 my rooms, says he.
En- says l. ~What kind Of an escort 10 son gen.
rally have when YOU 90 home
But this Is different says he, ~ths strange woman
an your roons," says !.
"Yes yes. says ne. Locked in, you know
Tut TUT saws l. ~Sure this ant some cheese
sandwich dream YOU had at the club, How go you
know she's there,
From Nikko, my man. says Biyens ~lie te.e-
phoned al about it, You See, while he was trying 20
tell her | wasn't there, She took him by the oo'l-,
dragged him outside, walked in, and turned ,he key.
And there She is now.
Why not" says I, ~when neither you nor the I.p
whskbroom juggler had bean enough 90 ring up
rop,"
The police says Bivens, shuddcrin ~oh. ia
rather not call them in unless unless IFS absolutely
necessary.
HUH says l. ~Then the mystery aint SO icep is
It might be- ch, II il came TO q showdown, you could
give guess about this strange female, couldn't you.
NO, no." protests Bivcns, almost blushn. Truly
could not II have not acquaintance of-ot that
sort. Really, haven't an idea"