Atlanta Georgian. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1912-1939, 1914-01-12
The Manicure
Lady
BY WILLIAM 2. KIRK.

ksTS HERE amt no use talking
George" said the Manicure
Lady. Il am getting too stout.
Nigh; Just as well own up to It. !
was taking a slant at myself In one
of them subway mirrors this morn
Ing. and I looked like Ed Dunkhorst.
the human freight car There amt
no class TO a fat person, George. 30
far as looks is discerned. and the only
thing for me to do is to reduce There
IS lot OF ways to reduce, and can't
make up my mind which way to
choose"
you ought TO do road work, ths
way fighters does" said the Head
Barber
TOO strenuousl" declared the Mani.
cure Lady And, besides there amt
no hills to climb in the city. and. be-
sides. amt got the time l guess
will try rolling around on the floor"
The boss might kick" said the
Head Barber.
II don't mean down here. you simp."
snapped the Manicure Lady, Il was
reading the other night how a IA,
star In musical comedy lost thirty
pounds. All she done was to roll
around on the floor in her room for
about half an hour Just before retir-
ing. Me for that"
Nobody but a nut would ty to re-
duce that way. said the Head Barber
You would knock down all the fur
niture In your room and wear out the
carpet and besides. shouldn't think
a dlgnifed dame like you would wan,
10 make yourself look ridiculous. Put
on 4 heavy suit and some heavy shoes
and walk hard for an hour before
breakfast every morning. ! bet /,
will make you feel fine and make you
lose weight. TOO"
"wifred was getting a little fat
few months ago, and he tried walking
a hour before breakfast" said the
Manicure Lady. The only trouble
with his system was that he picked
VIZ a A"Ait " 4i4s-- III dAth6 pdSA al VI
them beer signs. and. like all them
poets. Wilfred is sure fond of his
brew He would walk half block
and then into the swinging doors and
out again. wiping his mouth. and dc
another half block and another col
umn right. st the end OF two weeks
he had gained ten pounds and was be-
ginning to look like a kettle. because
he Amt got no height to carry no
weight. So he stopped his morning
exercise and found another way to re-
duee He took a oath that he wouldn't
eat any meals except when he got a
check for some OF his poetry from the
magazines He got two checks IN two
months. and they was dinky checks,
too He lost all his weight mighty
quick with that system Now he eats
when he feels Ike II. l guess fasting
would be about the best way to get
off o"e's ruue~lative flesh. after all
why don't ~ try fasting?" asked
the Head Barber It's cnch YOU
would pet thin II you didn't eat"
Its near enough TO fasting up at
the house now. the way things cost
said the Manicure Lady Honest to
goodness, George, with eggs seventy
eight cents a dozen and meat accord
ing. and with a hungry poet in the
family, II keeps the old gent and me
hustliag to make the wolf stay out
side the door Father Is a grand old
provider. and always has been, and
am sure OF his little comfort when l
kick In with my bit on Saturdays, but
Wilfred is. one of them intermittent
workers. and Maymc being married
now and living in double blessed
ness, we have TO do little figuring
Think OF eggs costing six cents and
a half apiece!
81 guess the hens is getting like
the sufrasettes % said the Head Bar-
Der "They are beginning TO know
and demand their rights"