Western liberal. (Lordsburg, N.M.) 1887-1919, 1914-06-05
GERMAN RED TAPE
A Most Irritating Brand Is Used
In the Postoffices.
SENDING A PARCEL BY MAIL

% EeFfeoNy oimPto operation.
In all innocence and lightness Of
heart l set out one morning to send a
small parcel to England from the town
IN Germany where / was staying. At
the postofhce I was confronted by
three booking Office windows. each
having a weird and formidable inscrip-
ton over It. These inscriptions were
not to be comprehended at a glance;
80, not wishing to rae up at them too
long. l selected the least crowded win
dow and handed over my parcel. 1t
was promptly returned to me with a
curt "Go to the next window" II
was Just that window l specially wish
ed to avoid, being the most crowded,
but ! waited my turn and then made
another attempt The official looked
at me sternly.
Have you the circularsT' he asked
"No," I replied family.
he handed me three circulars, for
which l had to pay a small sum and
which ] was requested to IN up. Pick
ing mp my parcel, 1 sat down to study
those circulars. They were covered
with instructions, the language used
was magnificent, AID the effect was
so overwhelming that l found it diff
cult to grasp what I was instructed
to do. If my papers were not filled up
accurately It was not from untruthfuL
ness. but owing to my limited German
vocabulary.
By the time I had described the
parcel, the gross weight thereof in
grams and Kilograms. the gross
value thereof in marks and pfennigs
and given a detailed description OF
each article contained therein, with
its separate weight and value, l felt
like an old inhabitant of that postof1ce.
l had seen. as It were, generation after
generation Of stamp purchasers come
and go, and still 1 remained As to
the weights, my idea Of Kilograms
was about IN a par with my knowl-
edge Of definite integrals. However, I
did my best. I guessed at the prob
able weight Of the parcel and divided
the articles into It.
At length I came to the end. and,
feeling like a candidate at an exam
nation, / gathered up my papers and
the parcel and went over to the win
dow. After waiting my turn l handed
over the papers. The official glanced
at them, then at the parcel. and
frowned.
did you weigh the art1clesT' he
asked sternly.
"Ya-a-ar" ! stammered
Then 90 home and weigh them
again. You have put them down at
half a tonT'
There was no help for It. With a
sigh l gathered up my papers and
went back to a secluded corner. After
patiently reducing all the weights I
again presented the papers. This time
they were passed, and / was sent on
to the next department. where 1 had
to purchase and I'LL up another docu-
ment 1 was now getting into form.
and this paper was soon dealt with.
Then, with my heart beating fast, T
handed owe the parcel It was once
more returned to me. The official said
he could not take it In that condition
Il was insecurity made up.
Now, If there is one thing upon which
I pride myself it Is upon the neat way
in which / turn out a parcel. So
smothering my indignation as well as
! could, l assured him that 1t would
be all right. that it was perfectly safe
and that there was nothing In II which
was breakable. he repeated firmly
that 1t was insecure and that he could
not take It So l sadly collected my
papers and the parcel and went homo
to dinner.
1 spent all the afternoon trying to
purchase a cardboard box Of exactly
the right proportions and some water
proof cloth to wrap round It. l next
procured a stick Of sealing wax and a
German seal, and by the time l had
finished that parcel looked as II 10
were prepared to travel to the north
pole.
It vas nov getting toward evening,
and l was feeling wearied after my
days work, so l besought my brother
"a willing. ~guileless youth-tO take &c
to the postof1ce. BE took 1t 80 innO-
Gently that my conscience reprOached
me for not having given him a word
of warning. he was a long time gone.
but that was to be expected. When
l saw him come in my heart sank In
despair.
They WON'T take It like this" he
said cheerfully.
/ groaned and asked:
why not2"
There's not enough sealing wax
on It"
Not enough sealing waxT' l cried
incredulously.
mo. You must put a blob wherever
the string crosses and wherever there's
a knot"
In desperation I seized the sealing
wax and worked away untl l had
used It to the last speck and the par
eel was one intricate Of string
and wax. Then I conveyed It once
more to the p~ostofice. It was now al
most closing time, and the officials
were in a hurry to get away. ! hand%
"A Ovor che nouara and fha DaRrol Nth