davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1914-04-18
QUAKER lfEDrTAT1oNs.
TFrom the Philadeiphia Record.

[From the Philadelphia Record.1
Perhaps after all 1t il better to be a
kicker than to be kicked.
Time heals our scars, but our wrin-
kles are more stubborn.
1t isn't q good plan to collide with q
man who il riding his hobby.
When q girl has been abroad to fin
ish her education don't tell her you
can see her finish.
Some people are always looking for
trouble 30 eagerly that they will even
dodge pleasure to find 1t.
Sillicus-''Do you believe love ID q
disease ?" Cynicus-"Yes, but not one
of those you can only have once
The fellow who never lets his right
hand know what his left hand IL doing
wouldn't make much Of . prize
fighter.
Wealth doesn't bring happiness. but
on the other hand poverty doesn't al
ways make the heart AZ Light a. the
pure.
Tommy-"Pop. what IL memory ?''
Tommy's Pop-'Aemory. my son. IL
the quality that enables q man to for
get judiciously.''
Man wants but little here below %
quoted the Wise Guy. Yes, . little
more than he will ever get" added the
Simple Mug.
Wigwas-sT flatter myself that I
can take . drink and let It alone -
Gu1xler-'.Sure: what good IL It after
You have taken Il ?"
1.-The critics all say your husband
has . wealth Of imaginafion." said the
friend Of the poet The poets wife
sighed. What pity It - that sort
OF wealth won't pay the butcher she
Daid.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1914-04-18

[From the Chicago News.1
Luckily a man is never too old to
forget.
Antidote for a girls pride young
er brother.
After doing the volplane love il apt
to land in cold water.
Hope il q good thing. but q meal
ticket enables one to eat
Considerable unlearning is necessary
for the high school graduate.
When a man starts down hill he
finds everything creased to assist him.
II a woman has q bunch that even
tuates accurately she calls It an in
spiration.
Rather than call you . liar to your
face some polite and cautious people
use the telephone.
Young women are ~ anxious to try
the new wrinkles AZ the older ones are
to get rid of them.
How can we love our neighbor n
ourselves IL he declines to praise our
virtues or overlook our faults?
Beware of the chap who always
agrees with you. Sooner or later he
VIII have an Ak to grind and want you
to turn the grind9tono-
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1914-04-18

..lGslancholy With nat faes.' in-
torrupted Jourt1an
~Poor child!'' sighed the artist
Tho truth came out one day. She
She had . sick husband. and when
she wasn't nursing him. she was pos
ing to earn money to provide medt-
cA1 caro- and delicacies for him. She
told mo this after she hAd slipped
from her platform one day and
spairing. almost starving. That was
what love meant to Mans Chandcs!"
"Oh!" gasped Flora, ~ she sank
Imply hack in her chair. Carl silver
was regarding her with stern. accus-
ing eyes. She knew what was In his
dust. How she had mtsjudged that
artist in the shabby. dusty studio OF
Paris. six years ago!
They both died-husband and
vie. added Silver. briefly. Then he
turned to his patron with . winning
not mar your interest in your new
picture. Mrs. Heminway?"
quite to the contrary. It has en-
lously.
She arose to depart. ana tho two
CUISINE. From her open window the
young and lovely Mrs. Heminway
beckoned to the retreating artist.
Il should like you to see .Enchant-
ment' when it is hung in my gallery. -
she said with formal sweetness
Then her eyes flashed upon his face
with q sudden revelation Of emotion.
Forgive me, Carl" she said, "Ah!
You-you have broken my heart q
second time!''
Floral" He eagerly took her out
stretched hand, his illumined face
framed by the easement Of the little
window. IF you can speak like that
all will be well with US yet
And az their hands Quiveringly
claeped all things In the present were
forgotten. and they were back again
in Paris and In the glamor Of the
interrupted romance Of their youth
Copyright 1914, by the Mcclure
Newspaper Syndicate.)
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1914-04-18
Globe Sights
By THE ATCHJsoN GLOBE

A cheap raincoat doesn't amount to
much in a million dollar rain.
Some Of the rules have too blamed
many exceptions to prove them.
A lot of organizations you claim are
after your blood merely want to be let
alone.
A woman wants to live near her kin,
and is hard to understand in several
other ways.
Dogs were endowed with four legs
probably because they have SO many
bites to scratch.
An Atchison man admits that his
conduct is perfect because he is
afraid of his wife.
Conceit also convinces some men
that they can shave themselves better
than the barber can.
Assuming that there are exceptions
to all rules. there may be somewhere
a hunting coat that fits.
This is wonderful era. since 1t is
now recognized that a man can be
sociable without being tight.
Wishing for it Is easier than work.
ing for it. although it may not get
much in the way of general results.
An AtchisOn man has such a long
nose he can stick 1t through q fence
and hoe the third row Of potatoes with
it.
Perhaps you see a good many peo-
pie you think are funny" And doubt
less you seem that way to many
others.
People will pay to hear a man talk
If he tells them what they want to
hear, rather than the truth about
themselves.
Sometimes man IL half way
tempted to believe that he knows of
several decent dogs and not a single
decent man.
Contrary to the domestic science
, few divorces. but it does develop dys-
pepsia, which is worse.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1914-04-18
Journal Entries

Too many young folk mistake infat-
uation for love.
.
A dimcult problem is usually the
only kind worth solving.
The man with many irons In the
fire also has a hard job in keeping
all Of them hot.
= .
What has become of the old-fash-
Toned party who was always pro-
pounding riddles?
AS a Latter Of fact. although the
women insist on having the last words
few men pay much attention to them.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1914-04-18
NEGLECTED THINGS.

We may as well face the fact that
SO long as We and our children are
at large In community. we shall be
In danger from all the evils that are
also at large in that community, and,
though we may be able to exclude from
our homes the moth. the housefiy, the
agent and the burglar, we cannot ex-
clude germs, writes Albion Fellows Ba-
con in The Survey. They ride in on
the trails OF our gowns, they are track
ed in on our shoes. They come in food
and drink. in washes. in clothing, in
wares. They come by messengers and
carriers and servants as do the in
fiuences of evil.
We need not go to the slums if we
do not wish. They will come to us, and.
wreaking upon us the Revenge Of Neg
lected Things, they will avenge the
poor.
Yet it il not vengeance the poor are
wanting. They only want help, and
they do not dream how much We could
give them, besides aims. They stand
afar on. and look at us, beseeching. too
timid to knock at our forbidding por-
tails. But the White Death. who has
been their bedfellow, Is not abashed
by any grandeur. or stopped by any
bar He comes straight from the filthy
howell to our homes. and peers in upon
US through the windows. while we
feast and laugh. He pushes opsn the
door. and strides in. and sitting down
at our very flreside. looks into the
faces of our best beloved. % that they
| cry out and die!
The revenge of the siums falls NOT
only upon the individual. but upon tbs
city. in all its interests and activities.
It falls upon tn city In losses o.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1914-04-18

Maud-'Caroline is q great woman
Of feshion." BeAtrix-'Does she neC-
lect her children?" Maud-"Oh. M
She hires nurses to do it.''-Life
when the train bandit was can.
tured, was he covered with conf,,-
sion 20 mo. sir; with the train crew1
revolver1."-Baltim American.
for man and beast" Wife-"Giye M.
two bottles Of It please; can use one
and my husband the other."-Rsr''
mfngham Age-Herald.
what are you making such = f,..
about? thought being executor Of 3.
estate was 4 soft thing" "Perhap. =
ID sometimes. But / have to wind m
the Affairs Of . clockmaker."-Ju0e
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1914-04-18
EUenine Chat
a Hint 10 saleswomen..

A Hint to Saleswomen.
There's one thing do not understand
about saleswon.
But before I speak Of 1t let me re-
call to my readers minds the fact that
have often sung the praises. and de-
tended the wrongs Of this particular
class Of worker.
Their patience is daily marvel to
me. What IL they are sometimes i'm
patient with the one hundredth GUS
toner? Think of the 80 with whom
they have been patient. What If they
now and then give a careless or rude
answer to a customers inquiry? Think
OF the 10000 or 50 questions they must
answer In the course of the day. 1t
makes anyone nervous to answer a
perpetual stream of questions. Haven't
You noticed what nervous looking crea-
lures the men at the railway informa-
ton booths always are? A mother
who loves her children with all her
heart often becomes nervous and i'm
patient wien they ask her too many
questions. Now the salesgirl does not
love her customers. and she probably
answers ten times as many questions as
the most harassed mother. Isn't 1t q
wonder then, not that she sometimes
loses her temper blu: that she controls
1t SO well.
And then their clothes! There was a
pr0ach. do not see how 1t can be 30
any longer. for the average saleswomau
In the better class of stores is dressed
with just as much style, neatness and
taste as most of her customers. How
she has the time, money and strength
to do it il one of the wonders OF the
age to me. Furthermore, she IL well
groomed, she carries herself excellently
and she usually speaks well.
II you should take half q dozen rep
resentative girls from ono Of the more
expensive shops and mix them up with
haIf dozen society ladies' I don't
believe anyone could tell which was
which: for in this case Julia O'Grady
and the Col0nel's Lady are sisters moi
only under the skin. but on top OF IL.
1 didn't mean to say 80 much on
that subject. but my enthusiasm ran
away with me. And now that I've spent
most OF my space, sugar coating my
Dill, let me come to the pill itself.
The one thing can't understand
about salesgirls is this. Why 80 many
OF them are supercilious when q custo-
mer wants to see something less az
pensive or doesn't buy because a thing
costs too much.
They must know what IT is to have
to consider expense. Surely they must
have had experience in contriving to
make little money produce big results.
Then why can't they have sympathy for
US poor mortals who have to do the same
instead Of pulling out the "some-
thing less expensive with q bored and
supercilious air.
Let me give them all q hint from q
customers viewpoint. BY such con-
duct q girl may now and then force
her customer to buy from fear of being
looked down upon. but she loses more
than she gains, for the customer will
frv tn avoid tns. r., thu f,<,,v>
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1914-04-18

Remember in the old-fashioned
days when school boys settled their
differences with their fists. Finally
one would get the other down. sit on
his chest and grunt between jabs, ''Say
huff" And does any one recall that
the lad Underneath and getting the
worst of it ever replied to his conquer
err: I'll say huff If you will?'' Well.
that's the unusual way that Mr.. Bryan
has arranged to get Subtraction from
11nerta.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1914-04-18
SIGNS OF the Times.


One Kansas farmer has two automobiles,
one for his family and the other to haul
hogs to market. Every time he sells q
hog he can buy another machine II he
wants to-
Some people are very touchy. There il
q man in Youngstown who refuses to
ride in the pay-as-you-enter cars. as he
thinks they cast q reflection ON his
credit.
Some day some newspaper in this coun-
try Is going to publish an edition which
does not contain q picture of Sir Edward
Carson. the leader OF the Obstetrics.
The woman who charges one fresh egg
for admission to her movie theater in
Guthrie, Oklahoma, is destined to become
a captain OF industry.
1t Is reported that men do the knitting
in Cairo. 1t il natural to presume that
the suffrage cause IL booming In that To-
cality.
The king of Albania is going to wear a
steel shirt of mail. The Albanian laun-
dries will certainly meet their Waterloo.
At any rate, hero b plenty of room in
the White House for several couples to
do their counting on the same evening.
Lillian Russell says the THINGS you do
not see do not worry you That applies
to bill collectors. of course
There IL said to be . shortage Of Pull
man cars, but it can't be- possible that
they have run out Of names.
Judge Alexander of Cincinnati says It
10 mans duty to help his wife ali he
can. Well, most men are willing to pick
out their wives hAt0.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1914-04-18

Mother Jones Is out of Jail again.
This makes possible another interna-
tional contest between her and Mrs.
Pankhurst as to which of them will
get back in Jail first. The betting
odds would favor Mrs. Pankhurst were
1t not for the fact that her physical
condition is badly weakened. because
. Of hunger strikes. a practice that
Mother Jones denies herself.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1914-04-18
without doubt the salute of Huert.

government to the American flag
would have been returned by United
States ship as q matter of courtesy and
in line with international customs in
this particular. But his demand for
1t. creates situation that is entirely
different. regardless of Mr.. Easy Co
ing Bryan's ideas in the premises. This
demand of Huerta's robs his apology
of any force.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1914-04-18

Remember.
BY ROY K. NOULTON.


You may forget to buy the thread
Your wife demanded. or the bread;
You may forget to pay the rent,
Or count the money you have spent;
You may forget to go to lodge.
And other duties you may dodge:
You may forget to kiss your wife,
Or cen fail to insure your life;
You may forget your dinner date.
Or else get there q full hour late;
You may forget to go to church,
And leave the pastor in the lurch;
You may forget to say your prayers,
Or many serious affairs;
You may forget to wind the clock,
Or turn at night the front door lock;
You may forget to go to work,
And simply stay at home and shirlk:
You may forget to pay your bills.
Or take your tonic and your pills.
BUT
Thuogh other duties you pass by,
Do not forget to
SWAT THE FLY.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1914-04-18

William Randolph Hearst who is
leading the forces in favor Of war with
Mexico and against the repeal Of the
Panama canal tolls exemption, seems
to confuse the voice of the people,,
about which he talks so extendedly,
v1-ith h{a ovp
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1914-04-18

You'll have to give it to the weather
man for the day he dished up for the
opening of the local baseball season.
1t mitigates some of his sins of the
past too numerous to mention.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1914-04-18

Eggs from China also qualify as be-
ing Of the country" variety. Most
people. though, are likely to be bit
skeptical as to whether the fresh"
can properly be applied to them.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1914-04-18

You'll notice, says the Cincinnati
Enquirer, that the sort Of man who
whines that he is driven to drink Is
always standing around with his
bridle ON.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1914-04-18

No doubt about the versatility Of the
crop killers. They've discovered some
kind Of a worm or bug that Is sure
to work havoc in the wheat fields.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1914-04-18

It appears that the now famous U.
8. s. Piffle. under the command of
old Cap Bryan. beat Admiral Badger
and his fleet to Tampico by several
YooOysae
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1914-04-18

Violent deaths are rarer in Kansas
than in other sections of the country.
This Is particularly true of those of the
homicidal and suicidal variety. Nor Is
it beyond the mark to suggest that
this il due to prohibition.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1914-04-18
OULL LEASED WIRE REPORT
OF THE ASSOCIATED FRESR

The State Journal n . member OF the
Associated Press and receives the full ~
0anisation Tor the exelus1ve afEnooo
0ubEcatlon IN Topeka
The news II recelved IN The STATE J00-
~ building evsr wa'ss tor ms sole -
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1914-04-18

Huerta's insistence that Uncle San
return his salute to the Stars and
Stripes changes the incident to a mere
bargain, not q courtesy.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1914-04-18

1t il unfortunate for the politicians
that their campaigns usually come
during the baseball season. Otherwise
they would attract considerably more
attention. Still, they are a sufficiently
big nuisance as 1t is.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1914-04-18

Anyhow, the many and big ships Of
the Atlantic fleet that have been
started on their way to- Mexico will get
some practice in steaming. And the
crews can be drilled while the vessels
are under way.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1914-04-18

General Coxey's present March on
Washington may also be prompted by
the fact that he has just placed book
on sale. Free advertising il the most
desirable sort.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1914-04-18

Present Indications are that by the
time villa is ready to march against
the City of Mexico he will find 1t In
the possession of the American army.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1914-04-18

Incidentally. To Chicago man. a
mail-order expert, who. enjoys the
largest yearly income, gathers it in by
selling his wares exclusively through
the medium Of printers ink.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1914-04-18
Kansas Comment
A BIG JOB AHEAD.

Fairgrounds, welfare work, general
personal halpfulness are great things.
but they are only the outposts Of the
great work that needs to be done. We
not get the idea that we are doing
our duty IN - doing. We must 20
deeper Ne must 60 to the root Of
tnm1 We can only relieve some Of
the effects Of our civilizations; we must
60 70 the civilization itself and make
ie over The need for welfare work
Il just the little red pimpie that teiis
OF something wrong in the world.
There - need OF men and women to
go to the bottom OF things, to dig out
the pad and throw it away. There
are conditions fundamentally wrong,
ana they must be righted. Wel1Are
work IL q means to an end. a payin9
90 the surface. We need to 70 after
the end. to work for the fundamentals
In life. The conditions are many Of
them wrong and they must be
changed. Man must have q square
oeal: money must be robbed Of its
special privilege. the man must be
put above the dollar. In other wordeL
g square deal IL the big Question:
Lawrence JournakWorld.
A CLEAN LIFE Is BEST.
What will be tho effect Of the shidlee
trial3 0ueringer was convicted Of ASSUME
and will be sentenced to die. That ought
TO make other beasts Of his stamp pause
mo think. On the other hand Ma. Shid-
ler's private life was laid bare to the
Worid. Tho average woman would die
ratner than tell the story of her life that
was forced frOrV MFs. Shidler by the
brutal lawyer for the defense. win not
TINS phase Of the case hereafter cause any
woman 70 eu0er the assaults of any brute
ner own Me page Of history that she
1 dare not allow the world to read? would
not mrs. Shtdler herself refuse to testify
zeal through which she must pass3 And
tnen again consider this: Il there any
| inner thing In the world than q clean life
and an untarntshed name that fears no
probe In later life this il plain to see.
put in order to produce the desired results
| II must be appreciated in youth. In other
| much wisdom has been passed around
Jewell County Republican.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1914-04-18

San Pedro. like every other Mexican
battle that has gone before It. was the
bloodiest one of the revolution. or SO
say the reports Of it.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1914-04-18

And the June weather Of today IL
likely to mean April weather In June.
Such weather stunts are usual in Kan
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1914-04-18

One good turn deserves
another. II he declare for
the Missue and she is elect
ed governor we shall use
our influence (if we have
any to see that Col. Harve
Parsons Is made matron of
5 any state institution. requir-
ing such official, that he may
select.-E. E. Kelley, in To-
, 1914-05-09
SIT. CMOIX STATION

49, - , WV.
London, May 9TH Continuing his 8peeci4
in the House Of Commons Yesterday, Mr..
Lloyd George proposed 20 balance the Bud
get firstly, by q revision Of The graduated
tax on earned incomes Of over one thousand
pounds a year rising to one shilling and four
pence between two thousand five hundred
pounds and three thousand pounds, and n
tax of one shilling and toHrpence on uuearn-
ed incomes, the estimated increase from
these sources being 5,23O,0OO pounds.
Secondly, by a supertNx on incomes oil over
three Thousand pounds, making the total tax
two shillings and eightpence in certain cases,
the estimated increase for this year being
100000 pounds and hereafter 7,750,OOO,
pounds. Thirdly, he proposes to take 25O.0OO
pounds more from investments abroad.
Fourthly, the death duties on estates exceed
ing sixty thousand pounds will bear a ora
duated tax up to q maximum of twenty Der
cent, yielding an increase Of 65O, 900 pounds.
Filthy, the settlement Of estate duty will
yield 100000 pounds more, and sixthly, the
balance Of one million pounds is to be taken
from the Sinking Funds.
Among the projected reforms is a national
system of valuation Of band. separating
the site values from the land values, for. the
reIlef OF the owner improving his property
III proportion to his expenditures.
The grants ia relief of local taxation are
designed as q recompense for the rates i'm
posed for national services, thu releasing
the funds for health, education and upkeep
OF roads. Other plans are for assisting the
, 1914-05-09

organ playing by the Rev. j. Weiss. The
singing which followed by the cuoir and Tie
soIolsjs was impressive. The story OF the
wicked qaeen, the daughter Of IA uotoliouely
wicked pain (Ahnb and JcznbeD w"s real at
intervals by Dr.. Lon9feld Smith with much
force and cIearneas. Among tue organ
pieces ought to be specially mentioned a
fine pen formance Of a grand war march.
After the close Of the OratoIio, Hi, Excel
lency the Governor SAID he was sure he
could speak for all present when he SAID that
they had had II most enjoyable evening,
and a treat Of u kind rarely heard here.
Bishop Grelder then on behalf Of Rev.
Weiss and the choir thanked His EXceIlency
the Governor for having presided, and also for
his kind words, at the snme time he would
on their behalf thnk the audience for heir
attendance. The meeting was closed with a
hymn and u prayer.