The Athena press. [volume] (Athena, Umatilla County, Or.) 18??-1942, 1914-04-10

~ 20 SuPPVseo tHdt Satan was t1e
Original Humbug-The Retail Cata-
iosue House People Have Developed
the Art Until II Has Become a Dis
ease With Them.
copyrighted. 1914. by Thomas j., Sullivan ]
On certain occasion some boys
thought they would play trick on
the great naturalist, Darwin.
They caught ii beetle, glued various
parts of other insects upon Its head
and body, placed 1t In little box and
humbly knocked at Darwin's door,
seeking to know what the great scien-
tist would call this wonderful bug they
had assembled.
Mr.. Darwin looked it over very crit
icnlly and asked the boys very serious
ly. did this bug hum when you
caught it?" "Yes, sir; 1t hummed
great DEAL" replied the boys, with sly
winks at each other.
"Then this must be humbug." said
Darwin.
1t Is supposed that Satan was the
original humbug, but since the mail or
der houses have been established he
has had to take back seat, and
among SO many modern improvements
he must feel dreadfully useless and
antiquated.
Love to Be Humbuuued.
That the American people love to be
humbugged long since has passed into
proverb. Trickery may be called
our national vice, our besetting sin.
Like liberty, 1t appears to be in the
very air we breathe. We take to 1t as
naturally as we do to politics. Our
entire social system has become satu-
rated with 1t, Even at times 1t mas
querades under the mantle Of charity,
which, like well filed purse, covers a
multitude Of sins.
There are various kinds and classes
of takers and tricksters, but the
princes of them all, the incarnations
Of fraud, are the advertising humbugs,
who, when stripped Of the sugar coat
ing by which they impose upon the
public, are simply professors Of false
hood.
Would Strike Liars Dead.
The ancient scribes tell us that the
Lord once attempted to check the
humbug habit by striking the liars
dead. but when he looked into the
future and saw the huge catalogue
houses looming In the distance he
reluctantly relinquished the idea, as he
saw that such plan in the congested
centers would prove more fatal than
second food
The mail order houses word their adj
vertising so as to appeal to the credu-
lity and weakness of human nature,
as 1t Is generally known that every
son of Adam and daughter Of Eve pos
sesses a disposition to resort to games
Of chance, an inclination to get some
thing for nothing
Possess the Gambling Instinct.
A noted gambler once said: Life
consists In taking chances. Providence
has instilled into the brains and hearts
Of men the betting instinct" So when
the mail order houses came into exist
ence they at once opened up an avenue
for the development of humanity's
well known weakness--a desire for
gambling.
As the catalogue houses passed from
the elementary and experimental stages
to that Of permanent and pronounced
reality the gambling instinct of the
consumer kept pace with the humbug's
progress.
The consumers read the bewItching
circulars describing the many wonder
full bargains; they fumbled the pages
of the huge catalogue In bewlldering
amazement. The angel of doubt hover
ing near whispered warnings to the
fascinated buyer, but the god of chance
was beckoning from the distance, and
the order was sent forward.
Cheap, Flimsy Seconds"
The advertising humbug's advertise
ments and catalogues depict his goods
as something marvellous. Bedsteads,
chairs, tables, couehes. picture frames,
heaters etc, which appear to be mas
sive, handsomely carved pieces of
work, are nothing but cheap. fiimsy
seconds" when delivered. and the buy
ar Is often ashamed to cart them home
IN the daytime, but waits for the dark
ness of night to cast its mantle over
heir defects.
Sometimes the gambling instinct Is
30 deeply set In the natures of some
consumers that one evidence of the
'rickery OF the advertising humbug is
and they again indulge
heir Dasslon for gambling by taking a