The Washington herald., 1914-06-09
Ssasesnes, Real and Near.
~ PRED 9. KELLY.


son who edits the Munsey dock Of maya
sines, vas Z printer on one Of the Frisco
nswspspsrs. he chanced one afternoon
to sttsnd . game Of bassbaii. II was the
nrst ball game he had ever Witnessed tn
his life. and he has not been 70, one since.
or 4 football game or horse race. either.
for that matter-becauss he cares not q
solitary continsntai about that sort OF
thing. He wisely takeG the perfectly
sound view that with ali the nshing there
10 to be done Il 10 foolish for . man to
fritter away hi time at baseball matches.
ball game IN his life. however, furnishes
" with this little tale. He was merely q
substitute printer in those days. and
when he returned to work In the evening.
after his little outing At the ball park. he
was delighted to hud that he had been
picked to work that night for regular
wages He hung up his cost and outer
shirt and started In. and the nrst piece
OF copy handed TO him was the account
Of the identical ball game he had been
to few hours previous. This coinci-
Quished his grasp on the typewriter
sheet and II blew out the window.
Now. instead Of going to the sporting
department and telling Of the disaster
that had befallen the once. Davis be-
came panicky. He feared to make a
clean breast Of the thing. lest he be PEN
allied or discharged for his awkward
ness.
Besides. what's the user he reflected.
Il saw the game. I'll just write the
account myself"
And 90. without the Intermediary pro-
cess Of putting II FIRST on paper. Davis
Transferred the story of that ball game
directly from his head to the cold type.
On the day following that baseball re-
port was declared TO be the best bit of
humorous writing that had ever broken
into the sporting page Of any newspaper.
The humor vas entirely unconscious, so
simply trying to hide his total lack Of
knowledge on the technical points Of the
game. But the whole ONCE laughed and
complimented the sporting editor on his
quaint humor and slapped him on the
back until his curiosity was excited, and
he looked to see what IL was that he
had written 30 cleverly.
why. ! never wrote thatr' he ex-
claimed angrily when he saw II.
That led to Davis being found out And
the next day they made him a reporter.
II one is going to be a successful
stump speaker II is vitality necessary
to study ones audience and give
them the kind OF goods they are In
the market for.
Timothy Ansberry, member of Con-
gress from Ohio. knew that and un-
dertook to operate on that basis. In
tho last Congressional campaign, Tim
was to speak one night at a little
- to Alafr tr3 ~
seems to have the upper hand. II is
one Of the most prosperous towns for
Its size In the State. and everybody
looks like ready money. Tim Ans
berry noted the well-fed appearance OF
the audience after he had taken his
seat on the platform and made up his
mind what kind of a speech would go
best. 1t did not take much reflection
to figure out that 1t was the time and
the place for conservative stuff-prop-
erty rights. the absurdity OF the popu-
lar cry against wealth, too many at
tacks on the corporations. the menace
of Socialism. and all that. In a very
few moments Tim had a nice little
conservative speech all mapped out.
But the man who spoke just ahead
of him had followed the same hunch,
and was saying almost verbatim the
things- Inn mad planned to oner the
villages. And strangely enough, he
wasn't getting any applause. It
like exactly the right stun for
the place. but II wasn't taking. Tim
overheard a man behind him mutter:
Hes a huluva Democrat
"Ah. har' thought Tim, so they
don't 90 according to form. They
look conservative. but are not"
So he changed his speech all around.
prohting greatly by the sad experience
of the speaker ahead of him. He
opened by saying that he hoped to see
the day when every rich man would
be in Jail where he belonged. He ad-
vocated every radical policy he had
ever heard OF and sprung several new
ones OF his own.
And on election day he got every
vote In that village except fve.
(Copyright, lel4 BY Fred C. Kelly. All rights
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