The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1914-03-21


Government itself or the thing Itself. II
| would Just make him responsible for run
ming Il the best he knew how.
The machine is 80 much greater than
himself. the office Ia 30 much greater than
himself the office il 20 much greater
| than he can ever he and the moot he
can do IL TO look grave enough and self
possessed enough 10 seem 10 MI H.
II can hardly refrain every now and
again from tipping the public the wink as
much as to say 1t Is only me" that IL In
side this thing. 1 know perfectly well
that will have to get out presently. l
know that then will look. just my own
proper size and that. for the time being.
the proportions are somewhat refracted
and misrepresented to the eye by the
large thing l am inside OF, from which
am tipping you this wink
For example, take matters OF this sort !:
I will not say whether IL Is wise or un-
wise, simple or grave. but certain prece-
dents have been established that In GER
tain companies the President must leave
the room first and people must give way
to him. They must not sit down II he
| is standing up
ut 10 very uncomfortable thing to
have to think OF all the other people every
time get up and Sit down and all that
sort of thing.
stops being President.
$50 that when I get guests In my own
house and the public 10 shut ont I adjourn
being President and take leave 10 be n
gentleman. II they draw bach and In
.i.t upon my doing something first
ARMY decline.
~There are blessed intervals when
forget By one means or another that I an
President Of the United states. one
means by which I forgot IL 20 get n
Ysttiins good detective story, get after
i
all over-preferably any continent but
this. because the various parts Of this
continent are becoming painfully SUCCESS
tive to me.
THE post offices and many other things
which stir "reminiscences have 'sicklied
them DER with "A pale cast Of thought
There are post offices to which / would
no, think Of mailing letter. which
cannot think of without trembling with
| the knowledge Of all the heart burnings
OF the struggle there was in connection
with getting somebody installed as post
master.
Now IL I were free ] would come not
infreQuently up to these rooms. You know
| ! never was In Washington but a very
few times and for "A very few hours until
| j came last year and ! never expect to
see the inside of the pubic buildings In
Washington until my term 10 over.
.The minute I tara sp anywhere I am
personally conducted 70 beat the band.
| The curator and the assistant curators
and every other blooming official turn up
| and they show me so much attention that
I don't see the building. ] would have to
| say: stand aside and let me see what
you are showing me-
For example. took a short cut
through the Treasury Department; the
other day. going In this door just opposite
here and cutting through and there was
great scampering OF custodians and
! what not up TO the Secretary Of the Treas
ury's office. crying The President Is In
the buildings II some menagerie ami
NAL or something that had TO be attended
were loose.
THE Secretary OF the Treasury few
days after said: I understand you visited
the Treasury
| mot at all said. 4 took a short cut
through 1t and escaped as soon AS |
could
Everywhere ! go l have that Some
day after ! am through with this Office
I am going to come back to Washington
and rec II.
In the meantime I am in the same
category AS the National Museum. the
! Monument. the Smithsonian Institution or
the Congressional Library. and every one
that comes down here has to be shown
the President.
National Exhibit.
III only kaew a. exhibition appear
anee 10 assume-apparentIy I cas- assum 2
other appearances that do not show what
IL going on iaside-I would like TO have II
! pointed out SO that I could practice II
before the looking glass and see II ]
could not look like the Monument. BE-
Ing REGARDED as . national exhibit II
/ vaulA ho mel sttun nj ha halaO hak IN
hands with by the whole United states"
And yet even that IN interesting to
me. simply because I like human beings.
II IL a pretty poor crowd that does not
interest YOU | think that they would
have to be all members OF that class that
dcvotes itself 10 expense regardless of
pleasure In order to be- entirely uninter-
esting.
These look 80 much alke-spend their
time trying 10 look SO much alike--and
so relieve themselves OF all responsibility
81 thought-that they are very monoto-
nous indeed to look at. whereas a crowd
picked up or the street ~ just a jolly lot
IA job lot OF real human beings, pulsat-
ing with rfe, with all kinds of passions
and desires.
1T would be "A great pleasure II unob-
served and unattended could he knocked
around a. / have been accust omed to
being knocked around all my life IL
could resort TO any delightful quarter "a
any place In Washington that ] choose.
II have sometimes thought OF going "a
some costumers-some theatrical costu.
mers-and buying an assortment OF
boards. rouge and coloring and all the
known means of Disgusting myself II II
We're not against the law.
You see / have "A scruple rs Presiden,
against breaking the law. and Disgusting
one self is against the law, but II
could disguise myself and not get caught
would go out, be free American either
once more and have a Jolly time.
Il might then meet come OF YOU gentle
, men and actually tell you what really
thought"
!, MIJRD0CK BLAMES TOLLS