The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1914-11-06
Being Termed q Prologue to
Saturdays Game.
IchabOd Football Practice On
and OF the GridirOn.
(By Clug.)


Time-Thursday afternoon at 3 O'Clock.
Players dressing, undressing. running
around wearing heavenly smiles. etc.
Enter Dr. Ernest. also wearing heav-
emily smile and some clothes.
DIR. Ernest: Hello. Chumps. how
goes it?"
Several of the boys in chorus: Hello.
Doc Got any candy or baby tablets!
I'm hungry
The Doctor: There are no 'taters'-
neither is there candy; get on your
clothes you big Rubes, and get out
on the field where you belong
villipigue: "Oh, Doc. please come
here and look at my hip"
Dr. Ernest examines WHY'S hip and
says That's too bad, Old Boy-water
on the hip; you had better stay out
of practice the rest OF this week.
Willy: but. Doc"
mo, nothing doing. Put on your
street clothes and stay out. Bring your
hip around every day for me to see.
Willy, as he begins to put on his ci-
william clothes: "Ain't that! Just
my luck
Dick whitcomb: "Get of my heel.
you big stiff What lobster got my
pants, anyway"
Sam Stewart: Mr.. Barrett. would
you be so kind as to tell me whether
or not my corset is on straight"
Enter Coach Grip Grey: What. you
fellows not out yet! You ought to
have been dressed half an hour ago.
Clean out! Five times around after
scrimmage for every man who isn't out
in five minutes"
Cot He'll: Say. lend me a chew OF
gum until tomorrow. will your
An outsider hands him a chew and
He'll says: That's fine-thanks-you
saved my life."
Curtain.
Scene 2-The athletic field, same aft
ernoon, sidelines filled with spectators.
first team and freshmen lineup for
practice, the freshmen carry the ball.
Continuous scrimmage throughout the
scene.
The freshmen work a forward pass
and He'll says: That's the eye, old
top; a nice one, Bobby Buzzard
Beals screams: why don't you break
that up, you big crow-footed slobs-get
in therev'
Wolf yells: Watch that man, hit
him low-make him forget he's in the
game.''
Mr. Thrill, from the sidelines: II
tell you He'll and Gray are some play
ers; did you see that pass? But they
can't do anything with that line"
Carl Linge, after several perfect
tackles. hits freshman and is forced
to kiss mother earth in a rather
abrupt and undiCnified manner.
Mr.. Willard, who is trying to light
his pipe, turns around suddenly and
exclaims: what was that, an earth
,Quake!"
Bub,s the water boy, trying to throw
water in a poor dogs face: Nav.
that was Linge hitting the ground
head first
Curtain.
tr--s
I Scene III-Back in the gymnasium,
g p. m. late, the players getting into
their street clothes.
Captain Trobert: II tell you. fell
lows. we have got to win Saturday
there's nothing else to it,"
ing to win. If a bunch of Oklahoma
babies could hold them to tie, we
sure can beat them"
Assistant SIN. Haynes: "Of course
we can, just like shooting fish with a
Krupp special"
Wolf: But I tell you, we have got
to use our heads. 1t has got to be
brains against beef; just watch mind
triumph over matter and Ichabods
over Jayhawkers."
Ream: well said, thou good and
faithful warrior, we'll meet the enemy
and they'll be our'n, as our good
friend Billy said"
Enter Coach Gray looking like
something was hurting him and still
wearing his uniform. He says: IT
want all you fellows to turn in early
tonight. Have a care about your
stomachs and bring out some pep
tomorrow afternoon"
Bub, the water boy: Goodbye, fell
lows, I'm going to Lawrence tomor-
row to help the H. S. win. I'll tell
you what 1 think about those K. U.
guys when I get back. So long,"
Curtain.