Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1914-03-01

amy more Me socyal standing will be
injured be me KNOWN ye.'
What ARE We talkin' about asked
Mr.. Hennessy.
I'm talkin' about what ivrybody else
Is talkin' about, said Mr.. Dooley. Firm
Kamehatky to Keosuk, tn whole civ
lived wurruld is at il. It's almost the
on'y subieck iv seeryous conversation
among tn white races. If a professor
wants to in'threst his class in zoology. he
begins his lecture be dom tn Lame luck
f'r thin. TIL S'ciety iv Ladies f'r tn
PREVENTION iv Ongwee Among TIL In
rorchnit Childher iv tn Poor is broken
up over it. one faction insistin' that tn
Macheek shall be made a compulsory part
iv tn coorse in sex hygeen in TIL public
schools an tn other demandin' that tn
little vans shall be vaccinated again it,
Its about tn ony thing We see in tn
pa-apers. Peoples ARE dancin that
few years ago wud've as soon thought IL
Iettin' their mothers or their bankers see
thin on a slippery flure as enthrin' an
OPIUM joint. But ma an tn userer ar-re
hoppin just the same as tn offspring an
tn creditors. / 60 into RESTRAINT with
an aged frind to discuss a platter iv ham
an eggs an tn pollytickal situation. I've
no more thin settled in me seat whin
phonygraft in tn corner explodes an
me yinrable commerade seizes holt "
lady at TIL admin table an goes reelin'
around tn fure with dish " soup in
wan hand an tn other hand in tn ladys
hair.
AT TIL theaytre whin Hamlet isn't first
sthrainin' Ophalya to his bosom an thin
slingin' her on her head acrost tn stage
tn aujeenee is givin' an imitation " tn
same in tn lobby. I see me frind, Officer
Casey. walkin' beat tn other day. an at
ivry foorth step he kneeled to tn pave
ment. I thought I'd go behind him an
subdoo him an take him home befure tn
loot saw him. But whin ! got near nm
I heerd him groan to himsilf: Wan. two.
three. dip an i knew he was prae,
,icin' tn Kitchen Sink FIR tn annyool
ball iv tn Lady Cref's Outin' Club.
"Th' banks close ivry day at noon to
let tn officers an directors take their
dancin' lesson. Dorsey wint over to Gro
CAMS bank tn other day to give him some
money to put where Dorsey cud niver get
it again. Usually on such occasions TIL
great financeer meets TIL bashful de-
positor at TIL dure an takes it firm him.
But this time Dorsey was stopped be a
clerk. TIL boss can't see ye, says tn
fellow. He's holdin' an important meetin'
iv tn board iv directors says he. What
ARE they doin'?' says Dorsey. They re
practicin' tn Hesitation to dance befure
tn Fedhral Resarve Boord. says tn clerk.
But we can shove ye'er money undher
tn dure if .ye want to- says he.
AT tn last meetin' " tn Steam Fit
ters' Union, Big Bill Higgins an Mike
Casey was discovered in tn back iv III
hall in what looked like a fraterna! rough
an'-tumble fight; whin they were siper-
ated they explained that they were good
frinds an Bill was larnin' Mike tn But
terfiy. A Methodist church in lndyanny
is thryin' to atthract people firm tn
Road to Room be advertiser that TIL
choir, instead Nv singin' tn Long Meter
Doxology, will do tn Gabby Glide down
TIL cinter aisle. In our own church last
Sundah, whin an altar boy made a genu-
fiexion, / heerd lady behind me say:
How graceful he does tn dip
NO wan but tn hopelessly crippled
liver ates any more. Schwartzmeister
has abolished his free lunch an put a
sign in tn window: Substantial Wur-
rukinmen's Free Dancin' Lesson Given
Away with Ivry Schooner iv Beer In
tn mornin' whin tn restaurants an other
dance halls lets out, millyons iv hollow
eyed students rushes to their well armed
repose at bench or desk. Wh!n tn clock
sthrikes noon they dash out fr hurried
Turkey Throt at neighborin RESTRAINT
an return to slumber over tn type
writer or tn bill Nv ladin' ontil 1t Is time
FIR thin to take up tn labors iv tn night.
TIL boss don't care. It's twinty to wan