davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The West Virginian. [volume] (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1914-1974, 1914-12-14


i have gone all my life. sedS Pa, drop
ming into q nice place. now g then To-
admire myself in the mirror g wrap
myself around lit elnectar. have new
yer oyerdone it much sed Pa, but !
have taken much plesnur III making a
bizness deel with a barboy any time !
feel thirsty.
But why shud you men go into bart
sed Aiissus Blink. Why doant you go
to sum nice hotel & have sum mullins
& tea about four o'clock? That is what
always say to my husband.
1 tried that onst. sed Pa. I went to
hotel tea with my preshus little help
mate here, & thare was three fellers
at the label dressed rite up to the min
nit. They seemed to know enuf to talk
10 the ladies' they had with them, Pa
sed. but wen they tried to talk to me
they cuddent git my sines, or sumthing
was the matter. / asked them what
they thought about George Stallings
now, & they dident know he was. Then
/ asked them If we wud ever git white
man to wipe Langford {: Joilnsing OF
the map, & they dent know what to
say. One OF them did manage to ask
me If / ever heard Caruso sing. Pa sed,
& wen sed Yes. he sed sumthing about
Caruso having nice tenor voice. Then
1 quit, sed Pa. Those boys may be all
rite, but thare ways amt mine.
doant think men meet the best kind
of associates in a cafe, sed Missus
Blink.
That is where met my trend here.
sed Mister Blink.
He had no bizness thare, sedd Missus
Blink.
Indeed sed Ma, my husband has
right to goware he pleeses. Then Ma
& Missus Blink had a Quarl. / guess
that is why it is hard to git Probishun.
The West Virginian. [volume] (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1914-1974, 1914-12-14
cAatsTMAe TREASURES.

IAconnt my treasures o'er with cure
a little toy that baby knew
A IfttIe sock &c fadad hue,
"a little lock Of golden hair
Long Years ego this ghrts tmas time
& Ny little one All % me.
e Sat robed I'm WhIts upon my knee
And heard the merry Christmas
chime
Z Tell me, my little golden head.
If Santa Claus should come tonight.
What shall be bring my baby bright
What treasure for my boy? said.
And then he named the little toy.
While in his round and truthful
eyes
There came look of glad surprise
That spoke his trustful, childish joy
And as he Iisped his evening prayer
He asked the boon with baby grace
And, toddling to the chimney place
lie hung his little stocking there.
That night as frightening shadows
j saw the white winged angels
come
With music to our humble home
and kiss my darling as he slept.
He must have heard that baby prayer
For in the morn, with glowing face
He toddled to the chimney place
And found the little treasure there
They came again one Christmastide
That angel host SO fair and white
And, singing all the Christmas might
They lured by darling from my side.
a little SOCK little toy.
A little lock Of golden hair,
The Christmas music on the air,
A.watching for my baby boy,
but IL again that angel train
And golden head come back for nc
To bear me to eternity
My watching will not be in vain.
Eugene Field
The West Virginian. [volume] (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1914-1974, 1914-12-14
Song and Story

We learn from the Knoxville Senti-
mel that in Sumner county, Tennessee,
there is a magistrate who is some
thing Of wit and poet. A short
time ago a negro couple named Jim
and Bet called upon him to unite them
in marriage, and he used this cere-
mony:
"Jim, will you take Bet,
Without any regret,
To love and to cherish
Till one of you perish
And is laid under the sod:
So help me, God"
Jim having given the usual atflrma=
tive answer, the magistrate contin-
ued:
"Bet, will you take Jim.
And cling to him,
Bothout and in;
Through thick and thin.
Holding him to your heart,
TIL death do you part 2"
Bet .assured him that she would, and
the married couple were dismissed
with the following:
Through life's eternal JOY and strife,
l now pronounce you man and wife,
Go upllfe's hill till you get to the level
And salute your bride, you rusty black
4 devil" HI, u. ~
-Poeah hon as Ind endent
ff44tf d
The West Virginian. [volume] (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1914-1974, 1914-12-14
Luke McLuke
(From Cincinnati Enquirer]

Man is supposed to follow wise
Nature in all other things. But when
he sees pretty girl he is supposed
10 shut his eyes and believe that it
would be wrong to get too close to
her.
Two dozen readers told me I was
wrong about the manicure girl and the
rubber gloves, so tried 1t myself.
New all / know about her hands IS
that she had dark hair and pretty
brown eyes and good figure. don't
know that it makes much difference
whether they wear rubber gloves OF
none at all.
You car tell girl that she Is as
pretty as picture without lying,
Some of those cubist pictures are
nightmares.
Call any woman an old hen and she
will lay for you.
A woman always kisses another
woman with as much meaning as II
she had been married to her FOR Ten
A married man and his hair are
soon parted.
The West Virginian. [volume] (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1914-1974, 1914-12-14
.LYTTLE Boobies PA
By William T. kirk


Pa took ma g me to Gu ON sum nm
trends of his last mite. The natmsot his
trends was Mister q lIissus Bin. I
liked Mister Blink wen i first saw him,
but I.dfdnet like rhs wife, her face was
SO sharp & thin g she Idident notts me
at ALL
Mister Bling was nice looking man,
his face was as round & red as appel,
& every time he wud smile, that is why
liked him. doant see why men With
nice round faces marry wimmen with
faces like the edge Of nife.
Well, deer, sed Missus Blink to Ma
wen we was all setting down, am
charmed to Sc that the grant cause Of
probIshun is making such gigantic
strides. Pos.terity will have us vim
men to thank for putting down rum,
she sed. Isuppoas you, too, ere deeply
interested in ProbIshun, sch sed to Pa.
Why, yes, sed Pa, am interested In
ProbIshun the saim as General Custer
was interested in the noebel red men
that surrounded him. AM watching
its progress the saim as Mister Custer
watched them red men approaching,
sed Pa, with fiutterins pulse & gone
feeling in the pit Of my stummick. Sum
times, sed Pa, 1 have a dredful mite
mare in the mite & dream that Probt.
shun has swept this whole fair land Of
ours. Then my wife hears me moan
ing & wakes me up, sed Pa. 1t is a
terribul. haunting thing. a nitemare
like that, sed Pa.
l fear l do not understand you, sed
Missus Blink. You surely are not
aggenst ProbIshun. You surely haven't
got the saim heathenish views that my
husband has.
WE'LL sed Pa, you may think my
ides are heethenish, but I doant mind
telling you that like al ittel cold tea
onst in while or oirener. That Is how
The West Virginian. [volume] (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1914-1974, 1914-12-14
4 mother has only her husband

a mother has only her husband end
children to please. A stepmother has
her husband. his children, the chill
dre1's relatives and the neighbors
TO satisfy
The rulc Is that the man who car
ries his change in a purse never
spends it very freely.
II you wish to know who the vui'
lures arc expose a little carrion 20
public view.
The West Virginian. [volume] (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1914-1974, 1914-12-14
State Editors
PREsIpENr,s MESSAGE,

1.-THE season upon which you are
now entering will be the closing ses.
sion Of the Sixty-third Congress, a
Congress, venture to say which will
long be remembered for the great
body of thoughtful and constructive
work which 1t has done, In loyal re-
sponge to the thought and needs OF
the country That is the exordium
Of the Prssident's message delivered
to Congress yesterday and which ts
plainly. 9 atement q the facts.
The West Virginian. [volume] (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1914-1974, 1914-12-14
TIMES HAVE CHANGED.

The Democratic organs rush to the
defense of the Democratic administers
ton by saying that il the army and
navy and the coast defenses are in
adequate it is the fault of preceding
Republicans administrations.
But President Wilson says they are
sufficient.
Other people will say that the Demo
cratic party has had an opportunity
to mend them and has not done so.
AS matter of fact what was ade
quate under Republican administers
ton is perhaps not adequate undol
Democratic administration.
The times have changed.-Connells
Vile Curier.
The West Virginian. [volume] (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1914-1974, 1914-12-14
First I.tlEsf Bank
OF [slNS&S9!N4S&NE5

II doesn't matter how tight a girls
hobble skirt is, she has to walk over
to wall when she wants TO scratch
a match.
The man who writes his love letters
on postal cards isn't going to get into
much trouble.
The man who marries a homelys glSl
has the consolation that he doesn't
have to stay at home all day to lshco
off the correspondents. d
Love is blind. That's the reason q
man whose wife is as big as the
Federal Building can't even see her
when 100-pound chicken fasheslinto
view.
have interviewed several hundred
billlonaires in my time, and j. never
rIet one who made bis money raising
Angora goats.
II the working girl is. as fearsome lof
her virtue as the sob sisters say she
is. she need fear nothing. Onions are
cheap.
There isn't much cred coming 20
George washington for not TELLING
lies. He married aSwtdow, and slle
would have a fat chance trying ole
to her and get away with it.
Isn't it funny how ugly sixteen
year.old boy can be and how sweet q
si1teen.year-old girl can be2
The West Virginian. [volume] (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1914-1974, 1914-12-14

given assurance of the ability OF
Congress to complete this program
within the limits of the short session.
but it is believed they are heavily
discounting possibilities in predicting
such accomplishment, for there are
some half.baked propositions of last
sessions discard that promise delays
Wheeling Intelligencer.
The West Virginian. [volume] (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1914-1974, 1914-12-14
THE POVERTY OF THE POLITE

THE POVERTY OF THE POLITE.
"They say politoness always pays,
The bill collector said;
"I've heard it told in many ways
In type I've seen 1t spread.
"And yet when I'm on business bent
I'VE found this, day OF night,
Tho chap who never has cent
Is always most polite.
"The men with coin are stern anc
gruff,
do not like their ways, :,
Rut still they beat the pleasant star
Politeness seldom pays.
Edgar "A. Guest in Detroit free
Press.
The West Virginian. [volume] (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1914-1974, 1914-12-14
EAnlX AnNERrlslNa.

Nothing will do more to promote
early Christmas shopping than early
Christmas advertising. The more
advertising the more shopping, the
more shopping the more profit to the
merchants.
The West Virginian. [volume] (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1914-1974, 1914-12-14
LIE HIaHWAYs OF INFoRMA

IA TON.
It has never been our pleasure to
sloos iups on. a more beautiful snow than
that (which fell yesterday and last
might, to cover the cold and SHY.
ertng form OF mother earth like, a
4 boundle less fluffy, whito blanket which
nature; in a sympathetic mood has
tucked 3snugly into every crack and
screyice, making the covering complete
The trees resemble bespangled
icicles and not a twig, be 1t ever so
slender, has shirked its burden In
holding up its part Of the crystalized
Ssplsndor to the apprectative gaze OK
al! those who enjoy the typical win.
ter landscape, painted by the hand OF
tho one Great Artist, whose brush Is
fadItless and whose touch is SO acci-
rate and delicate that a perfect pic
IIre Is produced without the aid Of
color, placing upon Natures brO1d
ScnnyasFa most harmonious and pleas
ling effect in pure white.
Over head the telephone and teie.
graph wires-those silent highways OF
intormation, over which travel the
first news of all great conflagrattons
and catastrophes; the report OF tue
election and death of Presidents and
tile great statemen Of the world; inc
making and undoing Of Kings and
Kjngdoms; the horrible stories OF
H1iumanfsacrif1ce from the blood stain
eSt battlefield; and chronicles of the
3 earthQuake and VOLCANOES terrible toll,
the announcement Of the coming
storm; the disturbing news of bank
failures and commercial crashes; tho
numb erless accounts OF small acct
dents. scandles robberies, muir
2ders and sundry, sombre tragedies,
that make the chronicling of the
news an unpleasant duty; as we'll as
the messages of hope and comfort
that come to greet us-the sudden
rise 60 fame; the daring acts OF hero
ism: the happy union Of men aud
women at the marriage alter;
tbs progress OF science and educa'
ton: the triumphs Of medicine and
surgery over death; the salvation Ut
souls; tthe coming OF the sunshine
and flowers; the outlook for good
crops and bigger and better bust
ness; the beautiful stories of love and
devotion; the greetings of friends;
and ali the countless forms of inforMa
tions that make up the routine of the
daily news events to either sadden Or
h to- gladden. the world; -these slenuet
threads Of metal extending like a
net across the sky line, are trans
fofned into huge white cables fropl
whose scrystalized surface the Informs
stienS they carry seems to glisten likC
E31iilIions of sparkling diamonds, as
passes on its silent Journey througf
ths labyrinth of the tangled pathways
over head, knowing no CONFUSION
Recognizing no block signals nor
swftches i meeting and passing with
out interference thousands Of sinh
slaI messages going In countless di
reetlons, producing modern miracle
seemingly as mysterious and mex
plainedable as the miracle by whicl,
the little sparkling fairies are conceal
led in the tiny snow flake to make Il
glitter and sparkle with all its prys'
lnatfc beauty.
The West Virginian. [volume] (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1914-1974, 1914-12-14
crNEeAlLy sPEAKlNe.

A Chicagoan visiting KENTUCKY was
Impressed by the military titles OF
the men to whom he was introduce l. !;
Almost everybody was a colonel.
One day he was walking the street
IN company with friend, who ad'
dressed passing gentleman as gen
erNl" o..
asked the Ch!cagoan. ),
"oh, just because he is nothing III
particular"
The West Virginian. [volume] (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1914-1974, 1914-12-14
saoHIIcKENn CONTROVERSY,

TAE acHicKEN" CONTROVERSY.
The Parkersburg State Journal very
gently takes the editor OF the Charles
tom Gazette to task for descending to
the Luke sMcLuke style Of journalism
and rebukes him for the use of tho
word chicken editorially in reference
to the gentler sex. Tho word so us.
ed. it unjust be admitted is not at all
dtgnifed, but is correct, according
to- Webster's dictionary which gives
one OF 1.-The definitions to the word
s..ehieken1gssas follows: "a young per.
The West Virginian. [volume] (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1914-1974, 1914-12-14

When a man reaches the point ut
which his occupation is that Of doing
odd jobs around the boarding house
conducted by his wife further at
tempts to conceal the fact that he IS
n financial failure become futile.
The West Virginian. [volume] (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1914-1974, 1914-12-14
Current Comment
so WHY WORRY?

Ereensburg Argus.
AS a rule most OF the things that
you do not understand are none Of
your business anyway.
The West Virginian. [volume] (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1914-1974, 1914-12-14

THAWING OUT THE WIRES.
Tho telephone wires seem to have
teen>placed in cold storage, but some
irrate phone user can be depended
upon to thaw them out before the day
ends,
The West Virginian. [volume] (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1914-1974, 1914-12-14
OUR EGG BILL.

Farm and Firestde.
American hens lay slightly over
$500, 100000 worth of eggs a year.
That is, every person cats on an aver
age SO worth.
The West Virginian. [volume] (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1914-1974, 1914-12-14
ALL is NOT LOST.

Philadelphia Inquirer.
Maggie Teyte has been robbed of
her trfhsers by ruthless Uhlans, but
she Is gained a lot of advertising.
The West Virginian. [volume] (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1914-1974, 1914-12-14

| order your coal from S1ccoYs COAL
COMPANY and get the best PITTS
BURG GAS COAL. Every load weigh
ed and full weight guaranteed. Prompts
delivery any place in city
Phones: Office Vi e
Bell 1873
Consol. 1913
Mine: Bella7sssJ. q
11-2G-e. o: vi fi
The West Virginian. [volume] (Fairmont, W. Va.) 1914-1974, 1914-12-14

THES eRoAN OF THE SNOW SHOW,
Ell.
The groan of the snow shovel was
"a familiar sound on tho streets toda:,
but the shovel was not suffering half
gasamuchsas its propeller.
Milford chronicle., 1914-09-25
CHURCH News

PRESBYTERIAN Church Preaching and
worship at 1870 a. m, subject "lhe
Human and Divine Names
St Johns Church Sunday September
27th. 1914. Mass ats p. m. Benedictlon
at Z. 80 p. m. All are welcome
Baptist Church Sunday $50 q. M,
Bible School. 1915 a. M, divine wor-
shin. 7.3O p. m, Christian Endeavor'
led bv Pro. E. Varney. A special pro-
gram. Thursday night PRAYER and
Praise service. The pastor will give
short talk on the Bible School lesson.
Avenue Methodist Episcopal Church
Morning service at 10.30, preaching by
the pastor. Sunday School at 2 p.. m;,
The Friendship Bible Glass has hXed
fms as Get Together Day. We are
expecting every member except the
sick and distant = ones to be present.
We shall have a roll call and all who are
compelled to be absent are requested
to respond bv card. On October attn;
tbe whole school will hold Rally Day
service-an every member present-day'
song service in the evening tins VIII oe
the last of these service5 for the sea e5
son. Glass meeting on Monday at i.5J.
PRAYER meeting on Thursday at the
same hour. The Junior League viii re-
organize on the second Friday in Octo-
her
Milford chronicle., 1914-09-25
CAULK CLUB SOCIAL COLUMN.

S. NJ. Reynolds was in Philadelphia
few days last week.
Miss Helen Kirke spent Saturday at
her home in Wilmington.
Miss Kathryn Truitt has returned from
a trip to Philadelphia and New York CIV.
Oliver Lewis. of Snow Hill, Md, spent
the week end as the guest Of Miss Eliza
beth Foulk.
Misses Mable FarrOw and Margaret
Housman left Wednesday to spend a feW
davs in Philadelphia.
The employees of the laboratory. were
grieved to hear of the death Of the father
Of Miss Sallie Cain, a member OF the
Caulk Club.
Matthew Hynson, Vaules Grier and
Harold Grier left on Monday to take up
courses at the following colleges his
kiminetas School, Salisbury. Pa Tome
School Port Deposit, Md, and the Har5
verford School, Harverford, Pa. II
A number of young ladies enjoyed a
delightful weekend house party al
SIanghter Beach last Saturday and sun
dav. The party consisted OF the Misses
Tess Pleasanton, Esther Walls, Elizabeth
Fonlk. Emma Davis and Eva Deputy.
Miss Nav Foulk acted as chaperone, anc
Lester Shannon, of Selinsgrove' Pa,
was the guest of Miss Pleasanton.
Milford chronicle., 1914-09-25
CUPID STILL ON THE JOB.

For many years the little God Of love
has laid in ambush for the employees OF
me Milford Chronicle, and a wedding
last Sunday proves that he is actively
EMPLOYED. This makes the thirty-seventh
wedding among the employees of the
Office. and the contracting parties are
bappy citizens of this and other states;
The wedding of William /. Stewart and
Miss Gertrude NJ. Price on Sunday, Sep
tember 2Oth. 1914, at the Cookman
Episcopal Parsonage in Wilmington
Delaware. is the last in the list OF en-
plovees of the Milford Chronicle to en-
Ter into the bonds of matrimony Ihe
bride was attended by Miss ldella
Stewart as bridesmaid, and Harry Cole
man of Wilmington acted as best man
for the groom. Rev. }. ?. Outten per-
formed the ceremony. Mr.. Stewart IS
the foreman Of the press room OF the
Milford Chronicle, and with his BRIDE
will reside in North Milford. AS soon
as they can get a residence to meet their
requirements, they will start house
I keeping.
Milford chronicle., 1914-09-25
needs $1,000, 900 FOR
ITS WORK IN EUROPE

Mrs. George W. Marshall appeals
through the Chronicle for funds with
which to meet the most appalling situa-
tion in history. Sl20 600 Miss Mabel
Boardman tell us has been received al
ready and has been used. Donations may
be given to Mrs. George W. Marshall.
president of the Milford Division Of the
Delaware Branch of the American Red
Cross Society, or to Miss Fannie c.
Holmes, treasurer of the Milford Chap
ter. who viii forward the money atonce
to Mr. Candy of Wilmington. Delaware,
treasurer of the Delaware Chapter of
the American Red Cross II may be
that people are hesitating to give be-
cause they do not feel that they can give
the large sums they would like to, to
meet the grave situation. Many are
perhaps holding OIL on this account.
/ But il would be far better for them to
give what they can, no matterhow small
+ III makes no difference whether the
money is intended for one country or
another. 1t will be used exactly as
/ specified. If you wish your rcontribution
I TO be used in any one of the countries
now at war it will be sent 10 that way.
/ If there is no specified request 1t will be
used in that way which toe Red Cross
thinks best. This is a case where such
a mite can do so much. For 5 or 10 cents
am anteseptic bandage can be supplied TO
some soldier who without 1t might have
.hio0d poisoning
Milford chronicle., 1914-09-25
CHRONICLE CARD BASKET
Personal and Social Functions
During the Week

E. b. Milman was a Milford visitor this
week
Miss Lillian Kern, of Philadelphia, is
visiting relatives here.
j ID. Preole. of Philadelphia, was the
guest Of Milford friends this week.
Mr.. and Mrs. John Nutter visited
friends and relatives in Houston TINS
week.
Mrs j. F. Gilbert and son Emer. Of
Atlantic City, are visiting Mr. ana MRS.
l. w. Lacy.
Mrs. F. j. Mccormick, Of Baltimore;
Md. is the guest of her brother and
sister this week.
Miss Ola jackson. of Waterbury.
Conn. has been the guest Of Mr. ana
Mrs. Charles w. Lacy.
Mrs. Jonothan Johnson Of Nerark.
Delaware, has been visiting her sister
Mrs. George Carpenter
Charles E. Banning left Tuesday morr
ing for Wenonah Military Academy,
Wenonah, N. j.. where he will take
electrical course.
Thomas j. Mowbray and Alphius Q.
Mowbray. both of Wilmington. are
visiting the formers father Rev. w.
r. M0wbray.
Judge Benjamin f. Davis, of Cape
Girardeau. Mo. is visiting friends ln
Milford this week He is a son OF the
late Thomas J.. Davis
Mr.. and Mrs. W. G. Abbott and son
/ George, are spending a few days Wllr
friends and relatives ln Philadelphia ano
Atlantic City this week.
Mr.. and Mrs James II. Hillman anc
granddaughter Miss Margaret +. b
/ Sharpless. who have been the guests OF
her son. Clarence Abbott, at Hickman
have returned home.
DR.. William Marshall returned hom'
last Tuesday from an extended trip Z
Michigan. and over the great northern
lakes. He visited many Of the lax
cities and returned via Niagara Falls
where he passed several days.
Mrs. Theodore S. Coulbourn. who ha
been the puest of her husband, who j
assistant paymaster on the battleshl
New York. at Galveston. Texas, ais
/ been the guest of her sister at Winns
boro. Texas. returned home Wednesda
evening.
Simeon P. Richardson has been az
Dointed to the position of head Of tn
Clothing department in the G. d. Abbot
Department Stores of Milford, and as
sumed the duties of his position las
Monday He has moved his family fror
baltimore. where he has been in the sam
business for several years, to Milford
He is the only son of William H. Rich
ardson, with George f. Pierce ana ool
the phosphate dealers OF Milford.