Montpelier examiner. [volume] (Montpelier, Idaho) 1895-1937, 1914-07-03

and Stock Car would pause long
enough to unload Bucket OF Oysters
and take on a Crate OF Eggs,
In this Settlement the Leading Citi-
zens still wear Gum Arctics with large |
Buckles, and Parched Corn is served I
at Social Functions.
Two highly respected Money-Getters |
Of pure American Stock held forth In
this lonesome Kraai and did General
Merchandising.
One was called Milt, in honor of the
Blind Poet, and the other claimed the
following brief Monniker, to wit:
Henry.
Neither OF them had to pay the Wo.
man who did the Homework.
Henry and Mift got what they could
during the Daytime and always stood
ready to trim up the Dark Lanterns
and operate at Night.
These two Pillars OF Society had
marched at the head of the Women
and School Children during the Dry
Movement which banished King Alec.
hol from their Fair City
As a result of their Efforts Liquor
was not to be obtained in this Town
except at the Drug Stores and Restaur
ants or in the Cellar underlying any
well-conducted Home,
For Eleven Months and Three
Weeks out OF every Calendar year
these two played Right and Left
Tackle in the Stubborn Battle to Up
| lift the Community and better the
Moral Tone.
They walked the Straight and Mar.
row, wearing Binders. CheckReins.
Hobbies and Interference Pads
Very often a Mother would hurry
her little Brood to the Front Window
when Milt or Henry passed by carry
ing under his arm a Package OF Corn
Flakes and the Report Of the General
Secretary in charge OF Chinese Mis-
sionary Work
Look" she would say, indicating
Local Paragon with index Finger. If
you always wash behind the Ears and
learn your Catechism, you may grow
up to be like Him"
But-every Autumn. about the time
the Frost is on the Stock Market and
| Wall Street Is in the Shock, Milt and
Henry would do skylark Ascension
from the Home Nest and Wing away
toward the Rising Sun
They called II Fall Buying. because
both Of them Bought and both OF them
Fell.
At Home neither of them would
Kick In for any Pastime more worldly
than a 10-cent M. p. Show depicting a
large number OF Insane People falling
over Precipices
The Blow-off came on the Trip 70
the City. That was the Big Show.
Every Nickel that could be held out
went into the little Tin Bank, for they
knew that when they got together 100
OF these Washers. a man up in New
York would let them have some TIFF
fanny Water of Rare Vintage. with a
Napkin wrapped around 1t as an Evi,
dence of Good Faith.
On Winter Evenings. Milt would
don the Velvet Slippers and grill his
Lower Extremities on the ornate Por-
tico such as surrounds every high.
price Base-Burner.
While thus crisping himself he loved
to read News Notes from Gotham
signed Carolyn Stuyyesant. who
seemed to have the Entree into the
Best Houses.
He did not know that Carolyn had
tangled Whiskers and jotted down his
Boudoir Secrets In Weinstube. using
borrowed Pencil.
So he believed what 1t said in the
Paper about well-known Heiress hav.
ing the Teeth of her favorlte Pomer-
anian filled with Radium at a Cost OF
$4,000
Whenever he got this kind OF a
Private Peek into the Gay Life of the
Modern Babylon, he began to breathe
through his Nose and tug at the
Leash.
He longed to dash away on the Erie
to look at the Iron Fence in front o.
the Home of the Pomeranian
When the Day OF Days arrived. Mil
and Henry would be seen at the Depoi
with congested Suit-Cases and theil
Necks all newly shayen and powdered
for the approaching Jubilee.
Each had pinned into his college
made Suit enough currency to LIT th'
Debt on the Parsonage.
Already they were smoking Foreigr
Cigars and these were a mere Hint o
what the Future had In Store.
While waiting for Number SIX the,
wired for Two Rooms and Two Bath
and to have Relays waiting in tn
Manicure Parlor.
Up a. the Junction. where the
caught he Limited they moved int
the High and began to peel fro.l tn
Rcll
The teak ordered In the p 1inl
Car h lg over the edge Of the Tnbli
and tLey scufied TO see which on.
would pay the Check
AS for the Hoy IN the Buffet ever
time he heard a Sound like % cent
he came out Of the Dark Room sn,
began to open small Original Pack
ages.
When they approached the Metror
oils, via the Tunnel they though
they we're riding in on a Curtiss 81
Plane
Between the Taxi and the Registe
they stopped to shake hands with al
Old Friend who wore a White Sui
and was known from Coast 10 Coas
as the originator of a Pick-Me-Ui
which called for everything back o
re Working pozrd ereaufZ the