davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-03-28
:! The Stars Laugh Department
Johnny Writes

n. j.. satterdy--a certen yung
husband that lives up In harlem
has got the iccbox habit
after n good supper, he will
slip out 20 bowl few games or
10 TO a lodge meeting. then
sneek in about ~ x. m. and fiji
up on anything that looks good
10 him
his wife thought there was
sumthing funny about the way
sections OF pie and dishes OF pud-
ding and one thing and another
would disappear. but she hadcnt
got wise 10 friend husband. and
she suEpeckted the hired girl
the girl she was wise all rite,
but she waHent going 10 say
nuthing as long as nobody else
did
well, one morning after they
had had brekfust and hubby had
left for his offs. mrs. wife de-
sided 10 ask a friend for lunch,
and she looked into the refrl1er-
alter for pretty near a whole
pudding that had been left the
mite befoar
she has good oyesight. bnt she
couldent diskoyer no pudding
44. .voAea YcIy Bternly at the
hired girl. and she says, clara,
can you tell me where II that
pudding that was left from last
mite
yes man. anBers clara. ! can
tell you where II Is. all rite
II has Just went down town
which being the case. some
thing was gaid 10 somebody
about something when the pnd-
ding came home that mite
johnny
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-03-28

LAURA GEISER IS
winner OF STAR
PRIZE FORSTORY

Laura Gusir. living at 1910 W.
FTndlay at. won The Star Circle dc.
partmcnt prize for the best short
story. Her story was the best OF
80 contributed TO the Circle.
For sending the prize winning
story Laura receives one dollar In
cash. Her story IL entitled. Walt
n Minute" and tells In interesting
style OF n girl Who developed bad
habit. and how she WAS cured OF IL
Every boy and girl ought 10 cut out
Laura'E story and save H. II teaches
a very fine lesson.
The judges awarded honorable
mention to the following Selma
Stewart. 4i92 iist s W. Mary Keins
sedro Woolley. Wash. Ethel Coop
or. 1871 27th nv. s: Myrtle TAFT. Al
gona. Wash; Carol TAFT, Algona.
Leiha Ducommun. 1851 W. bTth at (.
Alice Stewart. 1882 4lst & w.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-03-28
BOYS PLAN OUTING

Seattle BOY Scouts are anxiously
awaiting the coming ~ Easter and
the vacation that goes along with
H. Two different outings are
planned for that week. one TO Sno-
qualmie Falls and tho other TO
Cedar Falls.
The boys leave on the Cedar Falls
hike Thursday. April . The troop
Will take the car 10 Renton. and
from there will walk TO Landsberg,
whore the night will be passed. The
second day the boys walk from
Landsberg TO the falls. visiting she
city's big power plant and dam.
The third day will be spent In max
ing the rSnrn to the city.
The Snoqualmie Falls outing be.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-03-28
"CASCARETS" FOR
COSTIVE BOWELS
HEADACHE, SOUR STOMACH,
BIlIOuekGss AND BAD TASTE
CONE BY MORNING


Furred Tongue, Bad Taste, Indi-
gestion. Sallow Skin and MIsera Bile
Headaches come from a torpid liv-
or and clogged bowels. which cause
your stomach TO become filled with
undigested food. which sours and
ferments like garbage in a swili
barrel That's the first step 70 I'M.
told misery - indigestion. foul
gases, bad breath, yellow skin.
mental fears, everything that In hor-
rfble and nauseating A Casoaret
tonight will give your constipated
bowels a thorough cleansing and
straiEhtan you out by morning.
They work while you sleep-a 10.
cent box from your druggist will
keep you feeling good for months.
Millions OF mon and women take a
Cascarst now and then to keep
their stomach, liver am bowels reg.
ulated, and never know a miser.
able moment. Don't forget the
children-their little insides need
. good. gentle cleansing. too.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-03-28
Sadly Fooled

He was one OF the smart
men who like 10 show their
cleyerneBs.
Sec ms make him look
small" he said. as tho beg
gar approached. Then he
listened solemnly 20 the tale
OF hard luck.
That's the same old story
you told me last week" he
said. when tho vagrant had
finished.
is IT." was the reply.
"P'raps ] did. p'r'aps | did"
he admitted. but I'd quite
forgotten meeting you for
the moment. was In jail
last week. and there was
such n lot OF us. you see"
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-03-28
Oettlna Him Rluht

We'll. did you discover
anything In stump's past lifo
that We can use against himr
Detectiye-Not a thing All
he ever did before he came
here was To- sell awnings.
Election Agent -- Why,
that's just what we want.
Wen say that no has been
mixed up In some decidedly
shady transactions
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-03-28
GIRLS PLAN TRIP

A meeting OF the Campfire Girls
Of the city was held Friday night
at Collins playfleld 10 consider the
proposed trip to Mt. Rainier. TO
gather specimens OF flowers for
the Panama exposition In 1915.
Major r. s. ingraham entertained
the audience with a stereoptlcon
lecture, portraying the scenic beau
~ OF that region. Ezra Meeker.
originator % the plan. explained
the ways and means Of financing
the trip.
The plan IL to spend the last
sages will he sent 20 Seattle by
two weeks OF July at Indian Hen
rvs hunting grounds. Daily mes
carrier pigeons A moving picture
operator will accompany the party
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-03-28
A GOOD MOTTO

The motto Of the Washing.
ton. d. c., Public Schools Ath,
letic league is n good one.
Victory IL no great mat
ter and defeat less; the es-
sential thing in sport Ia the
striving 10 excel. and the
good feeling Il fosters be-
tween those who play fair
and have no excuse when
they lose"
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-03-28

sEATTLE's LEAGUE BIG

The Seattle grammar school boys
who play baseball In the league
have the distinction OF playing in
the next 10 the largest baseball
league In the world The New York
Public Schools league Is the only
one with n greater number OF teams
This year the Seattle league has ~
teams. including 1,005 boys, regis.
tered 10 play ball.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-03-28
ELIMINATE Jobs
JUST NEW SCHEME

The elimination OF IL positions
in the health department and the
creation OF six new ones TO take the
places OF the old. was recommended
TO the council by a vote of the ~
nance committee yesterday.
The plan will effect a net month
ly saving OF 1888.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-03-28
Too Old to Get a Job
HEN Robert Moon

VIZ HEN Mooney jumped into the lake at chicago
wv he was hshed Then he explained why he had
done it.
~ am out of work When asked for jobs they laughed
a and said too old am on, he SAID
"Thev" said that they" had the old conception
of business" the selfish greedy notion which made them
the larger margin of profit TO be made oy exploiting
the labor OF youth
II business nothing more than that employment
should be for the largest possible enrichment OF employers
the place for like poor old Robert
But Is such business the kind OF business that human
y needsl
II it is let frankly face the fact that somehow
Il must paw dscards and not selhshy shuttle
the of their keep upon the community at large
If il is; great objective is always to be the enrich
rnent ftest uckest few, then let's promptly tax
favored few provide humane places OF refuge tor
the old and old whom their greed has squeezed
dry
All over the great and rich corporations enact
ING based the belief that workers W
10 aren't good of dividends They demand the
right take their pick the prime period for exploitation
If this right be conceded this policy OF efficiency
recognized and allowed best for the men who run
the business then justice let's make them pay
for the privilege and roundpay so well that no human
castoff has given the best OF his life TO the
enrichment shall in his old be lett stranded
hopeless victim of others greed than were the
aged during slavery timeswho being property
got food clothing shelter and much care as was
given other animals
But of course such business isn't business at all; it's
simply a conventional form OF piracy.
business human service the service OF the many
rather than the few And its profit in welfare rather
than in selfish wealth.
When get through heads this finer concep
lion of business be Robert MONEYS jump
they'll be busy their brethren
pgRcHANcE MURPHY. formerly political boss Of New York
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-03-28
HOLD RALLY APRIL 4

Major Ingraham has completed
all arrangements for the regular
monthly Scout rally at the Lesrhi
park pavilion Saturday night, April
T. The Mercer island, Queen Anne
and Greenwood troops will furnish
the vaudeville stunts. Before the
show and games brown bread and
beans will be served.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-03-28
ny jim Nance

bN JIM mRNtE
The man who Eoos ahead In life.
With lots ~ stop ana jerk
lie is the man who always takes
You mornings down 90 WORK
Electric currents no controls.
lie runs cars with bis han.
We loved tho horsocar driver
hut. on. you motorman
p. S.-"Juat look at that blame
wagon get right In the tracks
Save Your Pennies
Mr.. Rockefeller IL $685.. 900
richer than ho was a week ago.
Save your pennieAl
Pops Reason
Tommy Pop. what makes tho
moon get fully
Tommy's Pop-Rushing the
dipper. suppose. my son.
Never Has 20 Wake
The doer always has II on the
dreamer. because no never has
10 wake up.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-03-28
Using HE krowieoge


Il want 20 be procraetinated
AZ de mex corner" EAid col
ored man yesterday TO a con-
ductor on the Phinney av line.
You want 10 be whatT" de
mandcd tho conductor.
Don lose your temper bad
20 look In do dictionary myself
befo' found out dat 'proeraAti-
nate means put Off. "
More Ways Than One
What a horsci" said the VIII
layers. az old Farmer stlnoe
drove Into the little market town.
why don't 20 feed tho poor
brusef"
"lts all skin an bone. with
head big 'nough for three
naasl" sald tho old hos'isr at
the George Inn. ~ the mIser.
sble looking beast was driven
into the Inn yard
~ must GET him a new collar"
said stlrae 20 the hos,ler.
a week later old stlnge went
In . temper 10 tho ssodIer.
What do you mean by making
my horses collar this slxe" he
blurted out. sta too SMALL !
can't get II over hls head"
"Over his head" yelled the
saddler. DO you think I've got
time 10 wastef Man alive. "
want made 20 90 over his hesdl
Back him into u"
what 10 the evil OF divorce
ard remarrisueT
The trouble Of breaking In .
new rother-in-is~."
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-03-28

tho hall with n stylish gown. silt
nearly TO the knee. He whis-
por"d something 10 the court
marshal. who at once escorted
the woman from the floor. muir.
muring that she had torn her
dress and that he had ordered
carriage so she might 30 home
and sew mp the rent
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-03-28
BARGE ON LAKE

The admirals barge. obtained for
the use Of the Scouts from the gov
eminent. will be placed on Lake
Washington today. The barge was
brought over from Bremerton by
is Scouts last Saturday.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-03-28
CITY WON'T PAY

A deficit or S7O,s5s.54 In the con-
domination assessment roll for the
regarding OF Shilshole av.. and con-
meeting streets. will not be drawn
out OF the city funds II the legal
office can prevent H.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-03-28

gins Saturday. April I. Tho Scouts
will 20 to Newport from Leschi park
by boat. and thence to Issaquah.
where they spend the night. on
the second day tho falls will be Wis.
tied.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-03-28

Courteous, But

Courteous. But
A minister wrote 20 ask leave
OF an Episcopal clergyman to
take a funeral service In the
churchyard. The courteous
clergyman wrote back by return
OF post:
Dear Mr.. Smith. please under
stand that ] shall be delighted TO
see you In our churchyard at any
time"
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-03-28
BROAD JUMP CONTEST

Reports from the fifth grade run
ming broad jump contests are com
ing in fast. The best average re-
ported to Director Ellis so far Is
from the Fairview school. with 10
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-03-28
SEASON OPENS APRIL 4

The Grammar School baseball
League will open with i6 games
next Saturday morning Games
viii be Played on practically every
plaSfield grounds In tho city.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-03-28
Seattle Wants No More of 1t

SSTO RETURN to the ward system of electng council
men," says DR. NJ A. Matthews, in public letter
10 the charter commissioners would be such backward
step that this city would from for TO
The old ward system expensive dangerous and
corrupting The ward systems OF Chicago and New York
disgraceful and make blot the page of American
municipalities yet board OF frcehodcrs afflicted
with gcrial phobia TO return TO
system which would again inaugurate purifying ward
politics"
DIR. Matthews is right
Who that has heard OF Hinky Dnk and Bathhousc
ohn the Chicago aldermen and their dsgracefu dcbauch
ing and brazen control of their wards will not agree
with DR. Matthews? Who will say that such political
blacknalers these could be elected as
aldermen il the whole city OF Chicago could vote upon
them?
But it is not necessary TO to Chicago and New York
prove the purifying character OF ward politics We
had the brown of it in Seattle till could bear
it longer
We have had experiences with the tin-horn ward
heeers.
We broke up their control when adopted the plan
elect counclmen from the city at large And those
down-andout politicians OF the old school licking their
chops and maeking their lips the thought that Seattle
again give itself over to their control.
Seattle does not any more OF it,
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-03-28

Former wife Of NJ. CaIllaus denies
giving editor OF Figaro any docu-
ments.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-03-28

SHOOT NE while I'm happy" said Waco Tex youth to elr
happiness
fellow Texas what trouble make him feel IKE
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-03-28
MURDER
IN THE FIRST DEGREE

II what il happening to thousands
Of teeth every day. Why allow
this TO continue? Come to our OF.
fees and have your case examine A
. free OF charge. We tell you ,ne
truth! And the advice we give
you Is for your benefit and not
ours. We use only the best ma,
tertals and our fees are within ev.
erybody's reach.
OURS 10 BETTER DENTISTRY
WE ADMINISTER GAS
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-03-28

THAT NEW YORK who for flirting objected
being That's probably
OF
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-03-28

off IT cutting pie
How could college professor
forda Iusures7
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-03-28

BRUSSELS. March 26.-Soeie.
~ leaders here are complaining
that royalty 10 dropping no far
behind the times that Il IL fall
ing into the realms OF old.fogy-
ism. king Albert OF Belgium has
banned the slit skirt.
~ the recent court ball he no
titled a society woman entering
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-03-28

Some clever boys Of erookline.
Mass, have probably the most
unique office for their wireless
plant In the country. It's In the
top OF tail elm and overlooks the
nelahboring houses like the aerie Of
an eagle
II was an extremely difficult
task. this building OF tree-office,
But by exercising care and caution
the boys accomplished the feat
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-03-28

GARDEN coIored
In orange" Rotten spot MoIyf
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-03-28

NEWSPAPER PICTURES Of that fellow Mary Garden billed
without kind "ssome' business TO help him
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-03-28

DR. FOSTER Of Oakland tango fine for
In the waltz, Doc
tanooIng old maid.
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-03-28

MURPHY formerly political boss Of New York
baseball Of Chicago, might o9ethe
confidence
srpasno The world
The Seattle star. [volume] (Seattle, Wash.) 1899-1947, 1914-03-28

what 10 the evil Of divorce
and remarrisae
The trouble o. breaking In .
new motherinIs~."
The Caldwell watchman. (Columbia, La.) 1885-1946, 1914-03-27
Goodbye.

With this issue Of The Watch.
man ny career as its publisher
CONES to a close. As entire
stranger came to your town SIX
wears ago and was received with
o2cr arms, for which | feel very
grateful. and ifmy services have
Eeen Ct any benefit to the Parish
Of Caldwell, Town Of Columbia,
o. The Waterman, | leave it to
you to judge.
During my six years Of resi-
dence here, have made many
friends, and possibly some enc
mics, but in passing from your
midst it is with the tenderest
feeling for you all. Possibly in
the future | shall wander to the
snow caps Of the frozen North
and back to the balmy breeze Of
the sunny South, but no matter
whittier | might 60, the warm
feeling of friendship which |
have for the dear people of Cald-
well shall keep ever a kindle in
my heart and memory the fresh
est recollections of the time |
lived among you and as one of
you. Goodbye.
E. L. BERRY.
The Caldwell watchman. (Columbia, La.) 1885-1946, 1914-03-27
The Forty Year Test.

An article must have excep-
tlonal merit to survive for a
period OF forty years. Chamber
laln's Cough Remedy was first
offered to the public in 1872.
From a small beginning it has
grown in favor and popularity
until it has attained a world
wide reputation, You will find
nothing better for a cough or
cold. Try it and you will, under
stand why it is a favorit after a
period Of more than forty years.
It not only gives relief-it cures.
For sale by all dealers. ADV
The Caldwell watchman. (Columbia, La.) 1885-1946, 1914-03-27
Good Roads The Boosters.

We understand that the police
jury has set aside a certain
amount Of the general fund to be
nsed for the purpose Of building
good roads, upon the condition
that the region through which
the road is to traverse, levies a
special tax sufficient to raise the
necessary funds to complete the
road. This is, beyond question,
the most advanced step our
parish fathers have taken in re-
cent years, and We hope that it
will not be but a short time until
a magnificent highway from
Ouachita on the north to LaSalle
on the south, is completed. Sure
ly, no more important subject
could occupy the attention of the
public at this time than good
roads.
incidentally, what has become
of the club We had, called The
Boosters Club?" How about the
board walk to the depot? 1t
seems that our merchants, our
business men, everybody, have
let the facinating little game of
checkers put the boosting spirit
over the ropes. And has The
Boosters CLUB" taken the count?
It's UP to you, Mr.. Businessman,
Mr.. Propertyholder to look after
your OWN interest.
The Caldwell watchman. (Columbia, La.) 1885-1946, 1914-03-27

of the year do not amount to a
hill o beans. The next session
of the General Assembly is likely
to develop leaders, or situations
that will completely upset every
plan now in formation; indeed,
that IS the rule in Louisiana poll
tics. When the General Assem-
bly, first meets under a new adj
ministration, it is but natural
that the Legislation enacted
and the general policy shall be
largely controlled and directed
from the gubernatorial Office
even though the Governor should
honestly desire not to interfere
with the legislative btaneh the
government, TITS sSfsytf =, Si
his views and desffs rot to be
felt and understood.s In conse-
quence, the first session usually
does what the Governor wants;
the second session generally does
what the Legislators want. In
other words, the opportunity for
individual leaders to be develop
ed and brough forth is present at
the second regular session of the
General Assembly, while it is
almost entirely absent at the
first Of these sessions. There are
generally to be found in every
Legislature some two or three
men who, feeling that they
possess the genius and the ability
to lead, or that the time is ripe
for their ambitions to have a
chance, work quietly throughout
the first session Of the LegisIa-
ture laying groundwork for the
machine they expect to build up
at the second session. As yet
the identity Of such ambitious
members has not been revealed,
but they will undoubtedly be un'
covered before the second session
has proceeded far. The slate.
makers will do we'll to hold uI
and see what the meeting of the
legislators will develop. -Shreve'
port Journal.
The Caldwell watchman. (Columbia, La.) 1885-1946, 1914-03-27
State of Ohio, city of Toledo, 9
Lucas County, y

Frank j. Cheney makes oath
that he is senior partner of the
firm of F. j. Cheney & Co., doing
business in the city Of Toledo,
County and State aforesaid, and
that said firm will pay the sum
of One Hundred Dollars for each
and every case Of catarrh that
cannot be cured by the use of
Halls Catarrh Cure.
Frank J. Cheney.
Sworn to before me and sub
scribed in my presence, this 9Th
day of December, A. D. 1886.
(SeaD A. w. Gleason,
Notary Public.
Halls Catarrh Cure is taken
internally and acts directly upon
the blood and mucous surfaces of
the system. Send for testimo-
mails, free.
F. J. Cheney & Co.,
Toledo, Ohio.
Sold by all Druggists. 75c.
Take Halls Family Pills for
constipation. Adv
The Caldwell watchman. (Columbia, La.) 1885-1946, 1914-03-27

you will give the matter your
immediate attention.
Surely, the cause is worthy of
your earnest consideration, for
tits from Him all blessinbs flow,
and it seems that every one of US
might contribute a part Or mite
of our blessings in worldly goods
to His service.
The Caldwell watchman. (Columbia, La.) 1885-1946, 1914-03-27
An Editors Savings.

An editor who started about
twenty years ago with only fifty
i've cents is now worth $l00, 600.
Ills accumulation Of wealth is
owing to his frugality, good
habits, strict attention to bust
ness, and the fact that an uncle
died and left him 500, 500. : Edi-
tor and Publisher.