The Celina Democrat. (Celina, O. [Ohio]) 1895-1921, 1914-09-18

COP. PLATFORM

~ 2A
The Republican platform, with its
various expressions in explanation
by Congressman Frank B. Willis,
has been the cause Of much trouble
When Mr.. Willis came down from
Washington last week, his party
leaders advised him to get out Of
Ohio and stay out until after cleo
tion, because with him here he had
absolutely no chance. In Washing
ton and quiet his state might be i'm
proved This was due to the fact that
his explanations of the "Liquor-tem-
perance" straddle and the knock on
good roads, had raised all kinds OF a
mess.
Now comes forward a patriot, one
Thomas c. Kelly, of Macarthur, with
an Interpretation which clears up the
meaningless platform, and which will
make it possible for Mr.. Willis to
come back to Ohio If he is willing to
give up the $2l a day, which is for
feited II he does not remain on the
Job at Washington.
A Platform Interpreted.
Mr.. Kelly, over his signature, has
offered the following:
"sir: The following version Of few Of
the planks OF the standpat state platform
will render their true meaning more
clearly intelgible:
1--WE reafiirm our adherence to all the
rea dictionary principles and special inter-
est-favoring practices which led to our
signal overthrow in 1912.
I'VE maintain that all we ever did was
right, expedient and profitable for the
leech-lilke machines which have fastened
themselves on the party in nation, state
and county all over the land, and our
course OF conduct will be the same as it
always has been II we are returned to
power
I'm revising the tariff, we pledge our
selves to return to the time -hOnored pol
Icy OF the G. o. p. to let each greedy spe-
cial interest come before the committee
Of congress having the matter in charge
anu name lAH pMli llEhiNS IN NiAN aNAAN''
ules upon which It expects to wax fat
and opulent by depressing the overbur-
dened consumer.
Sky-high tariffs enable us to send the
cost Of living to similar heights, and un-
restricted immigration supplies two men
for every job, thus enabling us to have
plenty Of cheap labor. We look with hor-
ror upon the plan Of the Progressive par
ty to handle the tariff through On expert
ha
so effective, efficient and satisfactory In
Germany and other countries. The prin-
ciple of equal and exact Justice to all Is
inimical to the interests of the band OF
sxploiters Of the whole people for whose
sole benefit the G. o. p. exists.
although the advent Of the Republi-
can party to power more than fifty years
ago was the signal for the disappearance
Of our merchant marine and Of our flag
from the seas, and we never took any ac-
tion during the half century OF our pow
er that resulted I'm the restoration OF any
part of said merchant marine, yet, now
that this great industry IL about to be
restored without our help, we are willing
to permit 1t ia be dbne.
1--WE urge congress to make liberC and
regular appropriations for the Ohio riyer,
although we ourselves could long agu
have had 1t improved to the highest de
gree If 1t were not for the fact that we
needed the money to improve Salt Creek,
up which stream we were constrained
to take our final voyage in the fateful
year of 1912.
I'VE arraign the so-called Warnes law
for unearthing Dan Hanna's intangible
property, thereby raising the amount OF
his assessment on the duplicate from six
teen thousand to about a million and
half, thus preventing poor people paying
Hanna's taxes for him. The iniquitous
Warnes law has thus uncovered about
one thousand millions of intangible prop
erty belonging to our favored plutocrats,
these millions never having paid any
taxes under a Republican administration;
the burden caused by this exemption
having been borne by the poor people of
the state, wherefore we look with horror
and revulslon on the provisions of said
law.
whereas, we are professedly strad
ding and secretly wet on the saloon
question, we recommend the decentraliza-
tion OF the liquor licensing authorities so
that the local saloon interests I'm wet mu
inequalities may have complete control
ever these authorities thus bringing
about perfectly beatiic condition OF af-
fairs
I'VE favor a return to the silly and fiI-
tile system Of expenditure for public
roads that formerly rendered our roads a
reproach and disgrace to the people Uf
the state. and we offer this concession as
hrihe to the county commissioners Of
the state. although 1t will do immeasur-
able damage to our progress in road
building and will forfeit expected nation
al aid on account of our proposition to
abolish the state highway department.
And lastly. we promise to tolerate all
good measures we can not prevent, and
we supplicate the electorate Of the state
to do anything at all about anything on
earth. but for heavens sake to give us
the offices; to the end that we may again
be enabled to perform such celebrated
feats az to appropriate TO the pockets OF
a few state officers and bankers the in
terest on vast sums Of state treasure"
The explanation would be more
complete had the author added that
the Republicans thankfully accept the
aio of the rejected lobbyists, who
would "lift the lid" from the public
utilities commission. so that car
concerns could hold up the
utility companies; and then by excess
watered stock issue, hold up the in
nocent public that is now protected.
Anyway the platform supplement 10
more frank and clear than Is the
original. and that is worth whilA