White Pine news weekly mining review. [volume] (East Ely, Nev.) 1910-1920, 1914-03-29
Applied for License to Steal Horses

Applied for License to Steal Horses.
A Coudersport. Pa, dispatch to the
Philadelphia North-American says:
The current issue of the Couders-
port Enterprise had the most novel
paid advertisement ever seen In
northern Pennsylvania. 1t was three
columns wide and IL inches long and
set forth the following:
APPLICATION FOR LICENSE.
No. 81 March Term. 1914
I'm Re Petition of G.. |. Lovegold
for License TO Steal Horses.
Hon John Fairmind, judge OF
court of quarter sessions of Almost
any county. state of Pennsylvania:
81 hereby make application for a
special license to steal horses. | am
willing to pay literally for the privi-
lege. ] am emboldened to make this
application by reason of other special
privileges pentitioned for about this
time of year by other citizens of
good moral character The business
for which they are asking license
produced at least ~three-fourths of the
crime committed In the county the
last year. 1t has filled our borough
lockups and the county Jail. 1t has
made our criminal court the most ex.
pensive in the history of the county.
1.-The business for which | ask a
license / deem less injurious to the
community than the business of sell
Ing intoxicating liquors either at
wholesale or retail.
Il. ! pledge myself not to take
away the senses of any mar nor rob
his purse.
-. obligate myself not to
men to beat their wives, damn their
children into the world, commit muir
der or raise hell in the community. ]
only want to steal their horses.
"3. And II man has a soul. which
most men consent to. ] promise to do
nothing to destroy this germ OF I'M
morality, but leave 1t to its
moral course. | only want to steal
horses.
"A. l. furthermore, solemnly
promise that II the license is granted
will not steal horses on Sunday
nor on election day, nor on legal
holidays. nor after 10 o'clock at
night. | also solemnly promise not
to steal colts. nor horses that have
no sense. or old ~broken-down plugs.
rs. Your honor will see the IL
cense | pray for will result In less
harm to the community than a license
to sell intoxicating liquors. OF
course, ! may damage the property
of a few weil-to-do people. but their
bodies, their minds. their reputa-
tions and character, | am above i'm
pairing. | only want to steal their
horses.
20. | would further enforce my
application by reminding the court
that you can't run the country with
out the license fee; that If ] don't
steal horses, somebody else will: that
all attempts TO prohibit horse steal
ing only results In producing sneaks
and liars that i am a liberal CON
tributor to the political jackpot and
that Il control more votes than
of the other applicants for license
II also call the attention of your
judicial mind to the number and les
pecially) character of those subscrib-
ing to my petition.
Trusting you will grant my petit
ton. and this ! shall ever pray, etc.,
&c. I. LOvEGoLD.
"Bondsmen, Winaland Syne &
Deth Trust company.
Attorney Firm OF n. o. Scruples
& Moore Longgreen.
I'VE, the undersigned certify to the
good moral character of the applicant
G.. |. Lovegold. and believe him to be
a man fit to be ~intrusted with a H.
cense to steal horses, and pray the
court to grant the license:"
Eaton d. Merry, Kant Evan Wright.
o. Grab Box, Michael chirilovana
Crewe l.. Younghusband, A.. Ward
Healer. Jostwon Glass, Tony Dublin
sky. Nick Synkivinkopraz, Barr 7.
Ender, Rednows Topper. Nurse N.
Useless. Wood b. Chrystin, AL Ways
sTreatin. A. Boozer.