The Kansas City sun. (Kansas City, Mo.) 1908-1924, 1914-07-25
WHY | LEFT MY HUSBAND

whose wife was uniformly
patient with him.
"She can stand It all" remarked my
friend, because her husband has al
ways been faithful to her. He has
never talked love to, or looked love
at, another woman"
The remark set me to thinking.
Are there who can forgive all
that a man may do so long as he re-
mains faithful to the letter of his mar
rage vows? Is the sin of inidelity
Che only one that the average woman
cannot condone? Perhaps that is
true. but, If SO, 1 am not like other
women. For my husband was faith
full to ne, as the world counts fidelity.
He certainly never made love to any
other woman, nor did he care par
ticularly for the society of the oppo-
site sex.
One of the wearing things about a
sorrow or a mistake is that one goes
over it in her mind. again and again,
always with the same wondering
thought, Suppose l had done this or
that, might not the result have been
different?" Who that has suffered
does not know the torture of such fu-
tile conjecture? So l, in reviewing
my marriage, find myself wondering
If, as a girl. I had been trained differ
emily, I might not have been a more
iudicious wife and made a better hus-
band of the man l married.
But my parents we're affectionate,
old-fashioned people whose one law of
life was that of love. Bear and for
bear" | was told, was the rule for a
happy marriage. To efface ones self,
II need be, for the sake of the dear
one was right. The plan worked well
with my parents and in their home,
We were a singularly happy and de-
voted family.
So when 1 married the man l loved
I determined to smooth his pathway
through life, and to sacrifice my own
wishes when they confiicted with his.
This gave him happiness for a few
years, and made him selfish. l had
not learned that a wife is, to a GER
tain extent, responsible for the char
acter of the man she marries as well
as for the characters of the children
she bears. The old adage, Marriage
makes or mars a man." is sadly true,
and the pitiful part of it is that in
trying to make a man comfortable a
wife often mars him.
For the first five years of our
welded life we were t~olerably happy.
MY husbands income vas sufficient
for our wants. We lived ia a pretty
cottage in a suburban town, and my
babies and home kept me confined SO
closely that l had no time for outside
interests or ambitions. My father had
given me a musical education, and be-
fore my marriage | was known as a
rather remarkable pianist.
As a wife and mother I kept up my
practicing. That did this in spite of
motherhood cares and housekeeping
responsibilities was, perhaps, evidence
that 1 was one of the musicians who
really love their art.
Money matters cause more marital
unhappiness than all the conjuSal in
fidelities which are supposed to fill the
divorce courts. At first the one point
OF painful feeling between my hus-
itsah and myself was the financial
situation.
/ do not mean that my husband was
stingy. During the early years of our
welded life he was willing to have me
order such clothes as I needed and
send the bills to him. He was safe in
doing this, for l was not ex~travagant.
Alfred paid the wages OF our n sery-
ant, settled the housekeeping &C
counts, wrote out d check for the
street costume each year, but he did
not give me money. When we had
been married some months I spoke Of
this to him. He laughed lightly.
why, dear girl" he said, don't
give you all that you want? You know
I am willing to get you any little
things that you ask for. I can't see
what use you have for money beyond
car fare and postage stamps"
Z flushed uncomfortably. l could
not explain to him hat l disliked hav
ing to ask my husband for every cent
I epent. But | tried to explain.
We'll. it is embarrassing not tc
have a penny. Suppose l want tc
take a ride on the street car, or sup
pose a friend asks me to go walking
and proposes that we take a cat
hOme-it is uncomfortable not to have
a cent In ones pocket"
"Ah-h," he said slowly, you wan
your friends to think that you have
money Of your own? l understand
Hereafter l will hand you a couple o
dollars when you want It for a far
and similar trifes. AS l have an &C
count at the stable. have the cal
charged to me If you need one. LIE
ne know when you require money TO
stamps and cars-and take this now!
He laid a two dollar bill on the ia
bile and went off to the station tt
eatch the train that would carry hin
30 his Office in town.
This was the first time that / hat
kyor been out OF temper with my hus
hand
At another time my husband wa