davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Harrisburg telegraph. [volume] (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, 1914-01-29

estcrday's Weather
Highest temperature, 55.
Lowest temperature, "A.
Mean temperature, a.
Normal temperature, rs.
The Adair County news. [volume] (Columbia, Ky.) 1897-1987, 1914-02-04
Absolutely UnIque.

Hear me one m o m n t
madam" said the peddler at the
front door. Il have not been
rendered incapable of active ex-
ertion by any sort of sad acct
dent; | have not been laid up six
months by infammaUory rheama-
tism; | have not lost my situ&.
ton on account of my religious
principles; am not poor man,
but am doing pretty well in my
line of business; | have not a
wife and three children depend
ent on me for support, for | am
a contented bachelor, happy in
the possession of no living rela
ii yes; am not studying for the
ministry; your next door neigh
Dor did not mention your name
to me; | never"-step right in, -
interrupted the weary woman,
with deep sigh of relief. Il
have been waiting for you for
the last ten years. Step in-I
don't care what you are selling,
whether it's horn combs or
clothes wringers. I'll buy. And
if you want a cup of coffee or a
glass of good, hard ,cider, just
say so. Step in-oon't bother
to wipe your feet!"-Puck.
The Adair County news. [volume] (Columbia, Ky.) 1897-1987, 1914-02-04
Luke MCLuke's Sayings.

1.-The old-fashioned girl who
used to know how to cook and
sew now has a daughter who can
play football aud fix a carbure-
tor.
Some girls are 50 afraid that
you will imagine thaey are mod
est that they do nothing but
brag about their modesty.
Any farmer will tell you that
there 'ain'I no SIGH" animals as
a gyasticutis or a $50 dog.
Most men would gladly love
their neighbor if she would let
them.
When a man tries to be polite
to his wife she. getssssuspiciou ,
and knows be has been doing
something AWFUL.
The people who are most in
need of advice are the lads who
are always trying to give it
away.
AS soon as girl discovers that
a man is married, she quits pos
ing for him.
When Ignorance is Bliss the
Blissful One always tries to pose
as a Wise Guy.
We all like to imagine that we
are the busiest people in the
worlp. But a dog fight or a fire
can always draw a crowd.
There wouldn't be so many
marriages if the Young Men call
ed on the girls early in the morn
ing instead of late in the even
ing. The Special Scenery works
wonders.
The Adair County news. [volume] (Columbia, Ky.) 1897-1987, 1914-02-04
Thought He Was a Butter Expert.

At Il party the hostess said TO a
guest; Il want you to entertain Mr..
Blank a little. He looks bored to
death. will introduce him. and you
must try to amuSe him. You know his
strong point is butter. on which he has
written a book
The lady guest graciOusly undertook
the task of entertaining the man. in
wardly wondering that he should be so
interested in butter-Of which she
knew very little-when his face indi-
Gated a mind given to much profound
thinking
However, with butter in view. she
began on the weather, gradually got to
the country. then on to farm. from
that to cows and at last to butter. The
man looked more bored than ever, the
magic word butter producing not the
slightest effect. and he left her some
what abruptly and soon withdrew from
the house.
Il did my BEST" she explained to the
hostess. II went through agonies to
prove that was deeply interested In
butter. but it was all in vain
Butter" exclaimed the hostess.
"What possessed you to talk to that
man. of all men. on butter? told you
he had just written a book on Buddha.
and knew how deeply you two were
interested in the same subject"
And they said in chorus, "GraciousI"
Strand Magazine.
The Adair County news. [volume] (Columbia, Ky.) 1897-1987, 1914-02-04
No Wonder Ii Was Cold.

The Observation-Disclosures of the true
My dear" said the professor on en-
tering the dining room one cold day
last winter don't alarm yourself. but
a slight palsy has manifested itself in
my left foot. In spite of the fact that
the glass is % degrees above zero my
right foot feels more than normally
warm. whereas the left is quite rigid
and stiff and cold as ice"
Upon the directions of the family
physician. who was summoned without
delay. the professor was put to bed.
when it was discovered that he had
two socks on his right foot and none
on his left foot!
The Adair County news. [volume] (Columbia, Ky.) 1897-1987, 1914-02-04
The Past.

Still shall the soul around it call
The shadows which it gathered here.
And, painted on the eternal wall.
The past shall reappear.
Think ye the notes of holy song
On Millions tuneful ear have died?
Think we that Raphaers angel throng
Has vanished from his side?
oh, no. We live our life again,
Or, warmly touched or coldly dim,
The pictures of the past remain.
Mans work shall follow him.
Whittier.
The Adair County news. [volume] (Columbia, Ky.) 1897-1987, 1914-02-04
When Mark Twain was Serious.

Mark Twain wrote, in one of
his note books, a passage that
may we'll take its place among
the best things ever said about
the style of the Old Testament:
1T is hard to make a choice of
the most beautiful passage in a
book which is so gemmed with
beautiful passages as the Bible.
Who taught those ancient writ
ers their simplicity of language,
their simplicity Of expression,
their pathos, and, above all,
their facult of sinking them
selves entirely out of sight of
the reader, and making the mar
rative stand out alone, and seem
to tell itself? Shakespeare is al
ways present when one reads his
books; Macauley is present
when we follow the march of his
stately sentences; but the Old
Testament writer's are hidden
from view.
The Adair County news. [volume] (Columbia, Ky.) 1897-1987, 1914-02-04
Methodist Minister Recommends
ChamberIaIn'S Cough Remedy.

Rev. Jas. A. Lewis, Miica, MIMI,
writes: "Chamberlain's Cough rem
edy has been a needed and welcome
guest in our home for number of
years. highly recommend it to my
fellows as being a medicine worthy of
trial in cases Of coughs, colds and Group
Give Chamberlain's Cough Remedy
trial and we are confident you will
find it very effectual and continue to
use it as occasion requires for years to
come, as many others have done. For
sale by PAUL Drug Co. AID.
The Adair County news. [volume] (Columbia, Ky.) 1897-1987, 1914-02-04
Newest Comet Drawing Near

Delavan's comet, the latest
stranger in the sky to come with
in the range of the telescope of
expert star gazerS. may be visi-
he to the naked eye soon. The
aintly illuminated. detailed OBJ
Get, apparently is drawing near
4 the earth, although up to a
;ew nights ago it was not to be
;een by a less powerful glass
han the five-inch finder of the
treat telescope at the Naval OBJ
bervatory, at Washington City.
scientists are keenIy interested
n the comet, which was discov-
red by Paul 7. Delevans, Of the
. ASgeRtine Naval Observatory at
La Plata. 1t was first observed
in this country by Prof. Asaphall
U. S. N, at the Naval O0serva-
tory, on Thursday. December is,
and observations were taken
again later. 1t has been report
ed as having been seen in Europe.
The Adair County news. [volume] (Columbia, Ky.) 1897-1987, 1914-02-04

Is, SIIU =,
land I'll buy just one Of each. But
do you sell kisses at your stall?'
"Oh, certainly came the ready re-
ply. One guinea eachr'
Right" replied the autOcrat. Then
I'll take a cOuple-and good measure,
pleasep'
Aunt" remarked the fair and dainty
damsel, forward, please. Two kisses
for this gentleman
The Old lady drew near. and for a
moment the man of means was non
plused. but only for a moment Then
he turned to his servitOr:
James" be said cOolly. lust take
this purchase. please"
The Adair County news. [volume] (Columbia, Ky.) 1897-1987, 1914-02-04

himself on the
bed and was soon
fast asleep. The
sights We're so
new and strange
to Pat that he sat
at the window
looking out. Soon
an alarm of fire
was rung in. and
a fire e gin G
rushed by throw
ing up sparks of
fire and clouds of
smoke. This great
ly excited Pat.
who called TO his
comrade TO get up
and come to the
window, but Mike
was fast asleep.
Another engine
soon followed the
The Adair County news. [volume] (Columbia, Ky.) 1897-1987, 1914-02-04

AANh LLlCA NlAttlAl VI
the place, follow
ed by his POM
pOus foOtman in
smart livery. was
going from stall
to stall. spending
his money freely.
All. Mr.. Fitz-
brendOn." said a
really sweet and
charming lady at
one of the stalls,
and what are you
gOin = to buy?
Dear Old auntie
and | are running
this table. and we
b We homemade
c a k G S. aprons.
penwiperS and"-
The Adair County news. [volume] (Columbia, Ky.) 1897-1987, 1914-02-04

smoke and fire like the former. This
was too much for Pat. who rushed ex-
citedly to the bedside and. shaking his
friend. called loudly:
Mike, Mike. Wake up, Come
quick and look. They are moving hell.
and two loads have gone by already"
Philadelphia Ledger.
The Adair County news. [volume] (Columbia, Ky.) 1897-1987, 1914-02-04
A Startling Event.

Two Irishmen fresh from Ireland
had just landed in New York and en-
gagged a room in the top story of no
tel. Mike, being very sleepy. threw
The Adair County news. [volume] (Columbia, Ky.) 1897-1987, 1914-02-04
" The
Scrap Book
Turned the Joke.

They were holding the annual chart
ty bazaar in an English town. and the
rich merchant of
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1914-02-19
JAMIESON'S SALE
BIG SUCCESS
LIVE STOCK BRINGS SOME REC
ORD MAKING PRICES.

The o. S. Jameson sale, Z miles
southwest of Artesian, yesterday was
onetof the most successful sales ever
held in Sanborn county. There was a
big attendance and the live stock
was sold for some record making
prices.
One span of mares sold for $3.50,
a span of two year old colts brought
S515; a span of yearlings went for
1910; sucking colts sold for SOS to
$50; several two year olds sold at
from $3.50 to s210 and the cheapest
yearling colt brought sos. The re-
markable thing about these prices is
that these horses We're all common
srades-no thoroughbreds among
them-and out of the bunch of 81
only four yer work horses, the 9TH
ers were colts.
The success of this sale was with
ont doubt due to the able manner in
which Judge Bros, the web known
~auctioneers, conducted it. They have
n reputation for keeping the crowd
in good humor. keeping the bidding
going at a good clip and for getting
the top prices. That this reputation
is deserved is shown by the fact that
this sale brought $500 and was
in less than 2a hours.
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1914-02-19

MT.

MT. Vernon. s. D.-Miss Mary
Porter was the Weekend guest OF
Miss Lorraine Owens.
DR.. and Mrs. e. w. Jones and son,
John. Paul, left Saturday for Chicago
where they viii reside for a short
time. Their many friends in Mt. Yer
non were sorry to see them leave but
wish them success wherever they
decide to locate.
Mrs. w. l.. Owens was a Mitchell
visitor Monday.
Mrs. Emery Newton and children
returned to Mitchell, Monday after a
Two weeks visit here.
The ladies dance Tuesday night
was a. grand success and a good num-
Der were in attendance to enjoy the
evening.
The Farmers Elevator held their
banquet, Thursday evening. About a
hundred and fifty were present in
spite of the stormy evening. An ele-
giant t~hree-course supper was served
after which n program of speaking,
singing was listened to and a very
enjoyable evening was had by all
present.
J. b. Hoppock returned Tuesday
from Alpena, where he has been
visiting his daughter, Mrs. Geo.
Schlund for the past two weeks.
A surprise party was held Tues
day night at the home of Mr.. and
Mrs, j. w. johnson for their daugh-
ter Edith. A number of the little
folks we're present and a most enjoy
able evening was spent.
Mrs. Willard Helgerson returned
from a two-weeks visit at Hinckley.
H., Tuesday.
L.. Often went to Minnesota We'd
nesday for a short visit.
The w. C. T. U. meets with Mrs.
T. B. Haynes Wednesday, Feb. 18th.
Word was received here Friday of
the death of Mrs. Dueckshire at
Chicago. Mrs. Dueckshire will be bet
ter remembered here ass Miss Katie
Ettesmold. Mr.. and Mrs. Ole Elites
mold and Mrs. Carl johnson left
Friday night to attend the funeral.
Mr.. and Mrs. John w. Johnson
We're rendered a surprise party Mon
day evening by a number of their
friends and neighbors. The party
met at the home of j. j. Johnson
and from there they went in a body
to the home of Mr.. and Mrs. Johnson
where a pleasant evening was spent.
Rev. w. 7. Ferguson in behalf of the
guests, in a few appropriate remarks
presented the host and hostess with
a silver set of salad forks. Light re-
freshments we're served and after all
had wished MI. and Mrs. Johnson
much joy and happiness in their new
home in Minnesota they departed
for their respective homes.
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1914-02-19
NEW cdTsN PALACE ASSURED.

1ES&4EExfSt f%@N~Q-NA
rhskeSdplie.n ] tew days leo 81
pressed tba: opinion that in order 10
Obtains I new ana permanent Corn
pai.ce building. ii is necessary only
6 n,lake start. Once the business
&c q the people of Mitchell are in
any way committed to the project. II
issas oertsin as anything can be that
Il Will be o6mpleted.
THIS all.fnportant 1nitia, stem w,s
taken last night at a meeting of ION.
tributors to the annual Corn Palace
fund. when a committee of seven wac
apbdihlsd to devise and report 81 an
carly date some plan for f~inanc,ne
tho new building and also what sj,es
ran pc obtained md what The bnild-
Ing viii cost.
The rest Of the necessary pre,in,.
inarfes for the new Corn Palace G.
largely q matter of detail. The com
inftfce chosen last night is abund-
aatiy qualifitd to recommend tho
most practical plan and it can be re-
l'ed supon ,tooswork along Conservative
Inca. Undoubtedly the plan tia. a.
pshls to III best Judgment wiz ,,e
sdopted andsunder it the new build
~ viii be eventually completed. n
z not the Mitchell way to turn back
onss ! task e undertaken. And, since
ne project IS nearer the hearts Of
Mitchell people than that of the corr
Fslace. is success is even more GER
tain than that at other UNDERTAKING.
no less fornidablc,
There is no occasion either for i'm
patience % anxiety. The new Corn
Palace building Is assured. The date
g ~ final completion is a matter 81
cotnplra.tfye unimportance.
0-ho-
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1914-02-19

Harvard university spoke more
to The point than in the following
words TO a New Haven trollyman
asking why he was opposed to or
ganized tabor.
II mo agree with you thai the
trades unions have brought iiappi-
ness TO any w6rkingmen. Higher
wages, shortened hours, better cloth
es and more meat DO not necessarily
contribute TO genuine happiness any
more than the Injuries of the rich do.
Happiness and content are states Of
mind"
Or. Eliot might have gone on and
said that the policies of most OF the
trade union organizations are not
snch as are likely to bring about the
state of mind which would produce
real happiness.
For example. can anyone imagine
that the Iron Workers Union can find
any genuine happiness in contempla-
ton OF the practice of It's officials in
dynamiting concerns that employed
n%on-union men?
Can the union miners OF Colorado
and Michigan derive a happy state of
mind from their armed conflict with
their employers? Is not the bitterness
apparent in these strifes the sort that
cannot be compensated by any in
crease In wages or shortening OF
hours?
There is only one basis upon which
capital and labor can contribute true
happiness to each other and that is a
consistent and cordial cooperation.
Or course this, like any other bar
gain, requires the approval of two
the right spirit. Capital must be as
constderate as capital would have
labor to be. But why is it that no
labor leader has conceived the idea
of approaching capital with a sug-
gestion that a e policy of co-opera-
ton, mutual helpfulness and broth
erly consideration, be adopted fol
future relations? Wouldn't that be
more worthy of the good that is in
many of the union men than a policy
of hostility and strife? At least il
would be interesting to g some
truly great labor leader, some Lin
coin of the mines or factories, as ii
were, step forward with some such
gospel. The Republican is not sure
but thatthe response would be a glad
surprise to those making any such
Suggestion.
%As<@
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1914-02-19
SERVICES HELD
FOR MRS. DOWNEY
FUNERAL RITES OBSERVED THIS
ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS SHIP
PED TO ILLINOIS.

Brief funeral services in
OF Mrs. Emma II. Downey, who died
yesterday noon at the home of her
son, c. w. Downey, We're held this
morning at the residence, 212 East
ruth avenue. Rev. E. f. Schwab.
pastor OF the Congregational church.
officiated.
II remains We're taken 10 Atlan-
ia, ILL.,, this morning by Mr.. DoWnev
and his sister, Mrs. A. l.. Johnson. OF
Edgar. Neb. They will be inferred
beside her husband, c. l.. Downey.
who died in June, 1912. The pall.
bearers We're II. r.. kibbee, w, III.
Conyes, S. II. Scallin, Nj. F.. Patton
and A. e. Dean.
me deceased was born in England
in October 6, 1898, coming to This
country when a girl with her parents
lhey located at Hoosic Falls. N. v.
IN 1he 5o's the family moved to
Springfield. Ohio, and she went IN
Atiallta, ~, to make her home With
an aunt, living there for many wears.
Mrs. Downey lived in South Da-
kota since 1889, making her home
at Ashton most of the time. A wear
ago she came to the home of her son
IN Mitchell. Her health has been
gradually failing, due to a paralytic
s,foke TWO years ago. About a
month ago her health 10
iail as the result of a leakage of
10 heart.
iha deceased was a member of the
congregational church and always
losk a deep interest in church and
r'll&ious work. She also was a mem
per OF the Eastern Star and of the
pauShters OF Rebekah. She was a
good mother, whose life was centered
IN her home and in the MANY friends
N the community where she lived
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1914-02-19
LADY BowLERs ORGANIZE

Sixteen OF the younger married
women OF the city organized a bowl
ing club at a meeting held at the
Elks' club last Tuesday afternoon,
when the first matches also We're
played. The high scores for the
first day We're rolled by Mrs. Joe VI.
Wood and Mrs. Herbert Shute.
On the coming Tuesday afternoon
the members OF the club viii be di-
vided into teams, c%aptained by Mrs.
Jay A. Dundas and Mrs. II. Fl. Ed
wards. The losers VIII entertain
the victors at luncheon. as a forfeit
for The match.
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1914-02-19
GAVE PATRIOTIC PARTY.

\ patriotic party of unique feat
ures was given yesterday afternoon
by Prof. Franklin Ford to the men,
bers OF his boys class in the Method
list Sunday school. The affair was
held between the hours OF 40 and
1870 O'Clock at the Ford home on
South Minnesota street.
Before the supper the boys were
entertained with a series OF interest
ing games. One of the games was a
contest for the boys who had the
best costume of George Washington.
This was won by Verne Weddle.
Martha Washington also was present
impersonated by Ralph Coetzke.
At the close Mrs. Ford served a
delightful supper in which she was
assisted by Mrs. +. C.. Hicks. The
house decorations for the party were
the. red, white and blue colors. On
the table were fayors of artificial
cherries. with the centerpiece OF u
stick candy log cabin.
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1914-02-19
MRS. GRACE M. BARTINE
is DEAD AT OACOMA

Oacoma, S. Don February 18th
will occur the funeral of Grace NJ.
BaTtine. wife of G. w. Bartine. an
attorney at this place. Her death
came as a result of pneumonia. She
leaves a husband and two small
children to mourn their great loss.
She was a member of the Eastern
Star and will be greatly missed in
church and social affairs.
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1914-02-19
sORoSIs CLUE MEErs

The Sorosis club met Friday after
noon with Mrs. Geo. l.. Peterson, S94
L. First avenue. and the afternoon
was given over to the study Of music,
and musicians. :. very interesting
paper on this subject was given by
Mrs. Jay c. Wood, followed by dis
cussions on the subject. A vocal solo
was given by Mrs. Will Pier, and a
piano solo by Mrs. Peterson. after
which refreshments We're served by
the hostess, assisted by Mrs. II. \.
Peterson. Visiting guests were Miss
Margaret John, OF Carbonate, H..
and Mrs. L.. II. Budrow, OF Mitchell.
The next meeting Will be held with
Mrs. w. w. Reams, 209 East Seventh
avenue, Friday. February -.
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1914-02-19
SOCIETY NOTES.

Mrs. l.. E. Beckwith. Jr., and Miss
Grace Beckwith will be joint host
esses TO the Ieh &c Bibbel club this
evening.
The Halcyon club will meet Mon
day with Mrs. L. S. Keen.
Mrs. II. r.. Boyer will he hostess
to the Today CLUB on Monday. After
roll call, Mrs. l.. j. Welch viii have
the lesson review, Mrs. r. A. Zangle
Will conauct the magazine review.
Mrs. Zangle also win act as critic.
The younger married set last even
ing held another OF their series of
dances at the Elks' club. 1T IS ex-
pected the dances will be held every
Friday evening for the remainder of
the social season.
The Twentieth Century club VIII
be entertained Monday by Mrs. Smith.
Mrs. kibbee viii be leader and Mrs.
Diehl magazine leader.
Mrs. G. II. Rev will entertain the
Mitchell Art club on Monday. Mrs.
Herman will have charge of the les
son. which will be on painting. Mrs.
]. w. Shelby will be hostess.
Mrs. S. Weir will be hostess to the
Round Table club at it's meeting on
Monday.
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1914-02-19
KINfBALL

Mesdames Quirk and Loft enter
tanned the o. E. S. embroidery club
Tuesday afternoon at the home OF
the latter.
Mrs. zana b. Lincoln, assisted by
Mr.. John Vershoor acted as hostess
to the Entire Nous Bridge club
Tuesday evening.
The Misses Brady. Brown. Jordan
and Hoops. teachers in the Kimball
school were at Chamberlain on
business Tuesday. They returned on
the evening train.
The Mitchell capital. (Mitchell, Dakota [S.D.]) 1879-1918, 1914-02-19
TEST WRONG.

ALl-E<t4t sA<J4 80 ~ 49, @aEtl[E~fsE EVtAea2 N4 y
Asain 1As aRepnbiIean Is pleasea
g comlasnd one Of the policies of
President v,.as IL; thia Instance,
interpretation 10 the literacy test for
iu1nisraiion. This paper believes
FIRMLY that the literacy test is ron
Q principle and therefore would he
wsons IL practice.
Whist constitutes an undesIreb,e
imsaisrants First 81. all, immoraIitv
Wit have literary qualifications i
GO with any mans moral nat,,res
seconds. there il physical incana-
clty. either " reason Of deformity q.
alsease What hare a mans mora,
scfuples to do with thate
literary test would exclude
"a not able to read and write
nst 4 is asweil known fact that manv
IS The best citizens derived by mo
NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS. 49, SmE aEAINTAFE :, ~
United States from immigration were
aaApie TO do either when they ente,
edxfi'is country. Thrift and honesty
~ he two traits in Immigrants that
Ase mostly to be desired. And cer-
1ainly 2 mar a be as thrifty and
nonezt as any 4 may want d vet
De e unable to pass a uteracy test IN
one ~ arrival at an American port.
~ EdfSpsan countries. as = rn,e
g acstion has not been offered 60
freely or made So easy as in the
upited States. This is a further rea-
sossSyhy rejection upon a literacy
testsas not ! desirable policy.
let thu Immigration laws be as
strict a they can be made against
those who are debased either IN Y~or-
als n in body That Ii as far as The
~sovsrnn,erit can fairly 60. II it is
. SfS - 4Ess4 E4 u seSt&F " ~
desired to restrict Immigration be-
caa1se too many are coming to the
unsted Slater. then q numerical limit
should '' be put upon those to be adj
n'ttsd within any year. But a liter
acy stpst would exclude many honest
mansend yet admit those most dang
sfoss 81 ~ citizens. who are Grimm
alsAnd atsthe same time well educat-
ed. a ~ 70 y, doubted il congress
vill pass the measure. II has never
bafscnce made its way past congress
49, then # was vetoed by President
TIT. The opposition to it in congress,
1teesther with that 81 President VIII
sqlle L likely to prevent its adoption
dqsisgssthe. prssent administration.
W-SD-
ON THE WRONG ROAD.