Evening public ledger. [volume] (Philadelphia [Pa.]) 1914-1942, 1914-12-17
GENTLE ART OF "REsoLUTINC"
Some Illustrations Showing 1t at It's Best and at
Its Equally Interesting Worst.

Some Illustrations Showing 1t at Its Best and at
Its Equally Interesting Worst.
IF THERE were any way of amassing and
i presenting to the public gaze all the reso-
Iutions that have gone into the discard you
could bury Pixies Peak under the pile or erect
a mound down in Mexico that would over
shadow that mountain you have to look up
in the dictionary every time you want to spell
1t. The gentle art of resoluting, fortunately,
is mostly harmless in its effects (Resoluting
may not be a regular word, but the lexicog-
raphers have failed to provide anything to
serve the purpose.)
Just the other day Senator Kenyon, Of
Iowa, introduced a resolution in Congress
calling upon the warning nations in Europe
to declare Yuletide armistioe Of twenty
days On the face Of 1t this resolution was
both timely and of high moral character.
The sentiments 1t suggested are utterly be-
yond reproach. Even the Kaiser and the
Gear, If the resolution ever gets to their
attention, will piously ndorse the Iowa
statesman's noble thoughts and then order
out a few more army corps.
The Secretary of State might offer resolu-
ton bidding all adult Americans to drink no
stronger stimulant than grape juice and we
all know that Mr.. Bryan Is eloquent enough
possible moral grounds. He need not be
merely moral about 1t. He can back up his
arguments with medical dicta. with statistics
compiled by the aotuaries Of insurance COM
panles; yes, and William Allen White might
be persuaded to add Kansas codci TO the
document The newspapers would print 1t in
full and then order their editorial writers to
shoot It up with dum-dum diatrlbes. But
think of what a lovely lot of publicity w. j.
B. would get out OF it-if he needed 1t. And
he doesn't seem to. At least not just at
present.
Generally those who offer resolutions that
are Just resolutions are seeking public atten-
ton This is almost a chronic condition with
politicians. They must not be, forgotten or
they become extinct like the dodo bird
h There was once a New Jersey legislator
who drew up and presented bill imposing
a tax on whiskers This bill contained
graded series of imposts to take care OF any
manner or style OF whisker or whiskerage
that had ever passed under his observation.
It was read and recorded just as officially
and at the same cost to the taxpayers OF
New Jersey as the public utilities bill or
the corporation tax bill, OF course It went
into the discard, the young gentleman
who drew 1t knew 1t would but he got his
short, sweet breath OF fame from it,
Farmers are pretty free from the resolut-
ing mania II Is TO be hoped that Progressive
Agriculture and the Wisconsin, Idea do not
bring them TO Il, else the cost Of living viii
mount higher than ever. The best way to
keep the farmers sitting tight on their sulEy
plows Is for the city folks TO maintain a
monopoly OF solemnly presented idle persinage
and publlolty-seeking gush. II enough Of
this Is aimed at the farmer and based upon
the fairly universal Ignorance OF farming
that obtains in the city, the farmer Is as
safe as II he were inoculated by potent
antitoxih.
When we look closely into this national
foible OF ours we cannot ind even an ultra
microscopic solution OF It. UP comes the
faithful old query, What are we going TO
do about it2 Plumb nothing, guess OF wait
we might pass a little resolution OF our own
against It.