Grand Forks daily herald., 1914-09-30
Laugh With Us

8
Master-Can leopard change his
spots?
Freddie-Yes, sir.
Now that's quite: wrong. You
know that a leopard cannot change
his spots"
oh, but he can, sir, really
We'll. tell me hoxS then"
When he's tired of sitting on one
spot he can change to another"
Just look at the wonderful color Of
the seal exclaimed tourist on his
hrst Mediterranean cruise. See how
blue it is!''
That's not strange" growled a
traveller who had lately run the gamut
OF the Neapolitan pensions and was
it's blue. You'd be blue yourself If
you had to wash the shores of Italy"
--Lippincott's.
Along in the sixties Pat Casey push
ed wheelbarrow across the plains
from st. Joseph, Mo-, to Georgetown,
Col, and shortly after that Struck it
rich" in fact, he was credited with
having more wealth than any one else
IN Colorado. A man of great shrewd-
ness and ability. he was exceedingly
write. One day an oldtimer met him
with:
How are you getting along, Pat?''
Go way from me now" said Pat,
genially. me heads bustin' wild busi-
ness. 1t takes two lid pencils day
to do me wurruk.''
An Irishman was out cunning for
ducks with a friend, who noticed that
although Mike aimed his gun several
times he did not shoot it off. At last
he said: Mike, why didn't you shoot
that time? The whole flock was right
in front of you?"
"Oi know" said. Mike, "but every
time OF aimed me gun at a duck an
other wan come right between u.s."
small boy seated on the curb by
telephone pole. with tin can by
his side. attracted the attention of an
old gentleman who happened to be
passing.
Going fishing?" he inquired, good
naturedly.
Nope" the youngster replied.
Take a peek in there
An investigation showed the can to
be partly filed with caterpillars of the
tussock moth.
What in the world are you doing
with them?"
They crawl up trees and eat off
the leaves"
so l understand"
Well. I'm fooling a few of them"
"How?"
Sending 'em up this telephone
pole.'-Judge.
y young couple were observed as
soon as they entered a railway car
rlage and Immediately put down
bridal pair. But they were remark
ably self-posSessed and acted just like
old married folk, SO that after a short
time the other passengers began to
doubt their belief after all.
AS the train moved out, however,
the young man rose to remove his
oVercoat and shower of rice fell
out. The passengers smiled broadly.
But even that did not affect the youth.
who also smiled, and. turning to his
partner, remarked audioly:
My goodness, May, I've brought
away the bridegroon's overcoat."
Remember, boys said the master,
that. in the bright lexicon of youth
there's no such word as fall" After
a few moments boy raised his hand.
Well. what is it,, my lad?' asked
the master. n..,
II was merely. gei4g to suggest, re,
piled the youngster, "that If such is
the case it would be advisable to write
to the publishers of that lexicon and
call their attention to the omission"
The small daughter of the house
was busily setting the table for ex-
pected company when her mother
called to her:
Put down three forks at each
place, DEAR
Having made some observations on
her own account when the expected
guests had dined with her mother be-
fore. she inquired thoughtfully:
Shall give Uncle John three
knives?''
Among a party of Bostonians who
spent some time in a hunting camp
IN Maine were two college professors.
No sooner had the learned gentlemen
arrived than their attention was at
tracted by the unusual position Of the
stove. which was set on posts about
four feet high.
This circumstance afforded one of
the professors immediate opportunity
to comment upon the knowledge that
wondsmen gain by observation.
Now said he, this man has dis
: :