South Bend news-times. (South Bend, Ind.) 1913-1938, 1914-09-10
w ar Gives Goldberg
Chance to Have Head
Measured By Envoy
BY II. l.. GOLDBERG.

We started for the American lega-
ton on Rue SomethingorOther. The
embassy was in a very quiet part Of
town, so people who wanted TO go
there couldn't find it, AS we passed
through FEtoile we saw heavy horses
drawing wagons that had been requi-
sitioned for the army. A beautiful
victoria was loaded to the bursting
point with mattresses. A jewelers.
delivery wagon carried several hun
dred loaves of bread. Rich-looking
limOusines and touring cars were hur-
rying in all directions laden with tent
poles, chocolate, knapsacks, tin cups
and shoes.
Everything that could possibly be
used by the army was pressed into
service. The men driving these odd
looking rigs were cheered every inch
of the way. They were better off
than | was, but | cheered them, too.
They had shoes and bread and were
going somewhere, but 1 didn't know
where | was going.
After asking "a people to direct US
properly and after taking everybOdys
advice and going in 81 different direc-
tons, which were all wrong. we came
out where we started and looked in d
telephone book for the right address.
In a time like this you are too ex-
cited to bother with small things like
addresses and directions and dates
and time and names. You do the
wrong thing and then find out why
you're wrong.
Like MOrtuary Parlor.
The embassy looked lit an under
taking parlor. There were two pale
looking young men standing in a cor
ner discussing how TO handle the
crowd. shall we make them stand
in line" said one statesman to the
Let fffrf.
their way in p?
The blonde the brunette. the red
head and | were the only ones pres
ent and we wondered why he should
mistake us for a crowd. We hau All
lost weight during those three trying
days of confusion.
1 had never spoken to an ambassa-
cor before. | was living fast l was
doing something for myself. IL took
an international war TO put me al
touch with the department of stat.
But | was there, inside the embassy,
and that was enough to convince me
/ was no ordinary person.
What do you want" inquired the
palest of the two young attaches.
The question staggered me. had
rot thought of anything like that. /
didn't know myself l stammered,
That's what | want you TO tell M.
What do / want?'
The redhead came TO the rescu-.
You see" she said, war has broken
out" The state official looked inter
ested. we want 10 get passports q.
papers of some kind 10 allow us 10
get on the boat at Havre If we can
get accommodations, if We can get a
train to take us 10 the boat If we can
leave Paris.
Sought History of Life.
To a cabinet, extracted few sheets
Of paper and tiptoed back 10 his desk
He asked us in turn where we were
born. when we had had the measles
how many times we had been ar
rested. what color bathing suits We
preferred and what was our favortte
soup. He then measured us behind
the ears and around the ankles.
After signing our names IN three
different styles green, red and blue.
We tucked our little papers under our
arms and started for the door
by the way" the Washington rep
resentatiVe shouted after Us. ''yOu
probably won't need those papers.
but If you do you have 10 ge. them
countersigned by the project OF police
and then YOU won't be able TO use
them. You must see the consul"
wanted 10 add word before
shutting the door, but the young man
was already busy making a date over
the phone for tea.
I gathered my flock and blew out
into the street 10 watch the army
vehicles being driven To the front by
the men who would soon be in the
midst Of battle, each encircled by a
belt OF a thousand bleeding hearts
Riding Course Deserted.
The beautiful equipages that used
To slide majestically through the
Bois de BoulOgne every morning and
afternoon were completely missing.