The Watertown weekly leader. [volume] (Watertown, Jefferson County, Wis.) 1912-1917, 1914-07-07
FABLES.
IN
SLANG
81
GEORGE
A[)E

| mis- Nostrfis, and achieved the undyfns
Distinction of being singled out by
Walter Camp.
| Edgar sat up on the Bleachers with
| $500 other Mere Students and lent q
| Quavering Tenor to Song about Alma
Mater
Even the Undergrads could not take
the Tuck out of Rufus.
He was fresher than Green Paint
and his Work was Raw, but he was 90
Resilient that no one could pin him to
the Mat and keep him there.
When Boy has been told SIT times
a Day for many Years that he Ii the
Principal Feature OF the Landscape, 1t
takes more than ordinary Doctoring to
Cure him.
He left College thoroughly convinced
that the World was his Oyster and
that he had an Opener in every
Pocket
He began grabbing Public Service
Utilities by Strong-Arm methods,
whereupon lot of Uplifters became
excited and wanted some one else to
head him Off
He put things Across because when
he tucked the Ball under his Arm and
began to dig for the Goal of his I'm
mediate Ambition, all the Friends of
Public Veal were scared Blue and re-
tired behind the Ropes.
Edgar took his Degree out into the
Cold World and began to make apollo
getic Inquiries regarding Humble EN-
sponsibilities
He became an Office Lawyer of the
dull gray Variety with special Apti-
tude for drawing up Leases and ex-
aiming Abstracts
He could not face Jury or fight a
the Sign on him and robbed him Of all
his Gimp.
But a Nice Fellow?
You know it.
Anyone who had a Book to sell, or
a Petition to be signed, or Note that
needed endorsing came dashing right
into Edgar's Office and Hailed him as
the Champion Patsy of the Universe.
Not one of these ever ventured into
the Lair of the Street Railway Car,
for he knew that Rufus might jump
over the Mahogany Table and bite
him in the Arm.
Even Edgar, when he made Rlsi-
ness Call on Boyhood Friend and Ioy-
Ing Classmate, was permitted to wait
in the Outer Room, resting his Hat on
his knees. and mingling on terms Of
Equality with the modish Typist and
the scornful Secretary.
And when they went away to look at
some Properties. Rufus took the State
room while Edgar drew an Upper.
Any great big Brute of a Man with
Tigerish Instinct for bouncing on
each Good Thing and then hanging OF
to it like Grim Death, never can win
the Esteem of the envious but anaemio
Gallery
Everyone at the Club referred to
Edgar as Good Old Scout, but when
all the Push gathered at the Round
Table and some one let fall the Name
of the High-Binder, they would open
up on Rufus and Pan him to a Wits
per.
Then Rufus would enter in his Fur
Coat, upsetting Furniture and, Serv-
ants as he swept through the Loun-
ging Room.
Immediately there would be an Epi-
demic of Goose Pimples and Rush
to shake Hands with him.
Rufus was sinfully Rich, but never
theless Detestable, because his Family
had drilled into him the low-down
Habit of getting the Jump on the Other
Fellow
Edgar may live in Rented House,
but he will always have the inward
Satisfaction of knowing that he is a
sweet and courteous Gentleman with
Pink Underwear, and Masonic
Charm on his Watch Chain.
When Edgar answers the Call. the
Preacher will speak briefly from the
Text, Blessed are the Meek"
If the Death Angel succeeds in pull
ing down Rufus, the same Minister
will end Suggestion for his Remarks
in those inspiring WORDS, Il have
fought the Good Fight"
MORAL:
The Scrapper is seldom beloved but
he gets Run for his Ticket.