The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1914-02-03
BY CLYDE PARSONS.


gratitude for her love and care, and hi
wasn't bit proud when he was LEI
along the street with yards of blue
ribbon streaming in the breeze an(
silver bell around his neck.
Mistress and goat were bound to at
tract attention when they walked out
Adults stared, small boys INDUCED il
levity, and dogs seemed to have {
longing to try conclusions witt
Billy"
However, fad wouldn't be much
of a fad unless it attracted atten
ton, and while Miss Nora tried to lool
calm and unconscious, there Is nc
doubt that she felt CLOVIS of pride a,
she caught such remarks as:
Did you everl"
Can you beat it,"
why don't she love a hippol"
Hasn't she father or a motherT
"A hobble skirt and a pet goat
thunder"
Miss Nora's father was dead, anc
her mothers objections to her fad car
ried no weight
Does Billie bite any one?" the
daughter would ask
"Of course not"
Does he bark and disturb us3"
No"
Does he cost any more to keep
than a dog?"
Il guess not"
HE isn't handsome. but isn't he bet
ter looking than bull dog?"
Yes"
Then what's the matter with my
keeping a goat?"
It's so unusual"
Wasn't the split skirt unusual two
years ago."
Living half a mile away was Mr.
Burt Wiltshire. He had a fad. In.
stead Of leading a goat about the
streets, he led a pig. 1t was a black
pig with red ribbon for collar. 1t
had been trained so it could be led
like a dog. That pig was also
an innovation as well as a fad. The
police had tried to suppress 1t, but
the courts had held that 1t had the
same rights as a dog and was not
half as dangerous.
Like the goat, the pig attracted
much attention when out for an air
ing, and like Miss Nora the young
man at the other end of the lead re-
ceived such expressions from the pub
lie as:
rs he an escaped idiot?"
Does he belong to a side-show?
Can the pig tell fortunes with
cards?"
1t might have ben figured out by a
mathematician that there was Just
one chance in ten thousand that the
girl and her goat and the young man
and his pig would ever meet on the
street in a head-on collision. That
one chance came to them. 1t was so
willed by the Destiny that shapes our
ends. At nine o'clock one morning
Miss Nora and her goat we're taking
promenade for their health and 9TH
er reasons. There was an abandon
about them that was charming. That
is. they occupied most of the sidewalk.
and their motto was. the public be
hanged.
At the same hour Mr.. Burt Wilt
shire and his educated black pig set
out for their stroll. They had here
tofore taken one particular direction.
This morning they took a new route.
Destiny would have it so.
Get on to the goat!"
"Where'd he get the pig!"
That's the latest thing at New
port!"
"Oh, Lord. what things we do see
in a town."
AS the public exclaimed the human
and animal objects gradually ap-
preached each other.
They finally met There was no
record In sacred or profane history to
go by-no society rule laid down in
the blue or red book Therefore the
Jim dandy goat and the educated pig
bumped against each other.
Sir" demanded the girl.
Miss" replied the man.
you have got a nasty pig there!"
And you have a villain of a goat"
Don't you dare let your pig-i"
And your goat"
1t was too late No work on natur-
al history-no writer on heart throbs
in the yellow journals. has told US
that when pig and goat meet there
must be deadly conflict, but a rec
ord has been made with this story.
The goat was the attacker but the pig
stood to his guns. The goat used his
horns and hoofs; the pig used his
snout and teeth.
Call your pig Off"
Call your goat Off"
your pig beganSthe fuss!"
Your goat began it,"
You are no gentleman"
You are a nice young ladyi"
A crowd gathered. That crowd
made remarks. 1t made remarks to
the girl and to the young man. 1t
gave advice to the goat and to the
pig 1t advised the goat to pin the pig
to the fence with his horns and hold
him there until life was extinct, 1t
advised the pig to remember Bunker
Hill and go in and make a whirlwind
finish of It
Not until the police came did each
owner gather up the remains Of his
animal and quit the scene of the COM
haf THAR oIopoao ovnrocaad DOthin O
but supreme indignation as they
turned away. 1t was so plain that they
wished each other destruction in some
awful form that a chauffeur who had
stopped to witness the affair while the
meter went right on recording, fez.
called upon to express himself:
Gee! but 'sposen he should fall In
love with that girl some day! How
she would turn him down."
And 1t happened. 1t was bound to
happen. Destiny wouldn't have missed
such golden opportunity for all the
old second hand hats in Boston. A
fad is acquired as easily as cold In
the head. Some run about the same
length of time-some a little longer
but they are bound to be abandoned
for something else.
Miss Nora Lee got home from the
scene OF that tragedy disguised with
her goat and herself. 1t wasn't the
same goat with which she so blithely
set out an hour before, and she
wasn't the same girl She found her
self hoping that the goat would jump
the fence and take himself of to be
seen by her no more. Then she would
buy parrot or a tame crow, or a
squirrel with wheel in his cage
She might even turn to French bull
dog or an alligator from Florida.
And Mr.. Burt Wiltshire reached