davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Grand Forks daily herald. (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1914-1916, 1914-12-24

late gentleman in the road. Wrath
filled his soul.
WELL" he grumbled. thank you
Just as much as if you'd helped me-
Evcrybody's.
Polly-Molly seems to realize very
fully the seriousness Of getting mar
ried.
Dolly-Yes, the poor girl is just
worried to death. There are sixteen
girls who want to be her trademarks,
and she can't decide which eight she
can best afford to make enemies Of
Puck.
AS usual, the road was "up," and
SO was part of the str eet, for that mat
ter. But it takes more than this to
keep Mrs. B~argainhunter at home.
Her two children comfortably en-
ed down the yawning street.
"Oh, what a darling of a duck Of a
sweet haiti" she. murmured. And,
leaving the perambulator, she walked
to the shop window for a closer look.
Absorbed in that darling of a hat,
she gazed at 1t all unconscious Of the
fact that the perambulator had rolled
away into Il. trench, until at last she
was awakened from her blissful
dream by the gruff voice of a work.
man.
these Riddles any more? Cos we're
Just going to fill the vote up!"
young man. what profession do
YOU expect to follow when You grow
up?"
I'm going to be a DOCTOR" answer
cd the young man, taking out a note
book and pencil. MAY count on
you to save your appendix for me?"-
The man knew that he was incom-
petent.. but he needed the lob very
badly indeed. The farmer saw at a
glance that he was a green hand, but
ne was greatly in need Of help. SO an
arrangement was made. After dinner
the farmer sent his new hand down to
plough a field. and a few moments
later followed him. Peering from the
observed for some time the frantic
but futile efforts Of his hand to run a
straight furrow. Finally the poor fel-
low came to a discouraged halt, mop.
ped his brow. and addressed the
horses YEARLY.
oh, we'll then. go wherever you
please" he said. TT all han got to
pe pioughed anyway. "-Everybody's.
What have o there, son?"
Ten BEANS" ....'
Beans? Do o mean dollars"
Why don't o call money by it's
right name?"
Amt beans a good enough name
for money!"
Not for you. You never plant
In honor Of a visit paid to his plant
ny the governor of the state, an auto
mobile manufacturer once had a com.
plete car assembled in something like
seven minutes.
Some weeks later, after this feat
was heralded in the daily papers, the
phone rang vigorously.
rs 1T true that you assembled a car
Grand Forks daily herald. (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1914-1916, 1914-12-24

in eve minutes at your factory? ?"
the voice asked.
YES" came the reply. "why?"
ooh. nothing" said the calm in
quirer. "only I've got the CART
Everybody's.
a regiment Of soldiers were at camp
and a young Scottish recruit was put
on sentry duty outside the generals
tent. In the morning the general rose,
looked out of his tent and said to the
young man in q stern and loud voice:
who are you?"
The young mar turned round smart
ly and said:
"Fine. Hoo's yersel'-"
A woman who had engaged q new
servant felt that she had al last
secured the proverbial treasure, for
the girl seemed to have a due appre.
citation of her beautiful home.
S you prefer to work in fine
h%ouses?" she remarked.
"Shure. num-" replied the girl. "It's
a pleasure to hev nuthin' but ixpinsive
dishes to break."-Judge.
A country politician in New Jer-
sey was elected commissioner. One
day he visited q school and told the
teacher he desired to examine the
boys and girls.
A spelling class was performing. 80
Grand Forks daily herald. (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1914-1916, 1914-12-24
In Or School
(By Paul West.)
ILLUSTRATED by Moser.)


One moar weery day & then let tho
p~ressunts come. say we!
A CRATE DISAPPOINTMENT.
Some of the fellers calm t. school
this moarning dressed up speshully
Fatty Believes, he having on his
blew SCOT. he saying he likes ware
it better when thay are anything to
etc. because if he spills anything on
a lite SCOT praps he wouldent see II,
4 he AN scoop it off with his fingers
| e. not lose it..
When asst why he thot thay would
be anything to etc Fatty sed, dident
we all see the big box which Blinky
Hammond, our esteamed jannitor,
brot in the school yesterday?
Miss Palmer sed she was glad to
see us all looking so brite & happy
today, becawse we was going to
have a visit fruln some ladies & gen.
nun in a minnut & she hoaped we
would behave ourselves while thay
was hear, as she dident wisht to give
us amy Christn3 pss pressunt Of lik-
kings. but If 1t was necessary she
would do SO, as: she newer failed to
do her dooty.. Z ~,
EN- Brigham h%olleder, You .bet!'
& got sent in the dressing room for
10 minuts, but he was out in s. be-
caWse Blinky Hammond stuck his he'd
in the dore 4 sed hear thay Gomez
Elk Whispered to Walt White as he
calm II that the box was in thare
thing pritty good, & then Blinky
Hammond cain to the dore agen &
sed hist" to Miss Palmer g. We all
stood up. But Of all the disappoint-
munts. becawse insted of thay being
amy ladies & genmun it was oanly
En- Brigham's farther, the minister,
e. Deecon Griggs. & Oald Miss Cush-
ACQUAINTED with.
Ex,s farther stood up on. the plat.
foarm &. started to talk, & he sed
he was glad to see our brite & smil-
ing faices, G. he frowned at Ex, who
was hitting Steve Hardy in the neck
with a cranberry just then, & sed it
was a crate day, & he wisht to an
nounce that the lokul committy for
the Belgium sufferers was gointer
take up a collecktion, & the box was
already to be tent to the Red Cross, SO
if sum Mise littel boy would bring it
out Of the dressing room the serre-
mony would perceed. So Phil Wig.
ellsworth & Bull Hickey went in &.
got the box, & Ex's farther put it on
Miss Palmer's desk & .sed how amy
httel boy-or girl which. wisht to- con-
trlbeWt would pleese drop his pennies
In the slit in the top. He called Elk
up & gaive him 2 sents & toald him
to drop 1t in, & Elk had to.
Miss Palmer sed the uthers would
now foller 500 &. every Teller had to
drop a penny in il he had amy. Then
We sung Merry. Merry Christmuss
Everywhere" & went hoam, & of all
the cheets 1t was the werst We ever
sean. say we.
Wei, tomorrer we will be enjoying
ourselves, We hoap, but we will let
you here abowt it! So Merry Christ
muss to all & Long May She Waive!
Grand Forks daily herald. (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1914-1916, 1914-12-24
FINANCE AND PUBLIC LIFE.

Recent discussions. at Washington
and elsewhere, have revived the old
charge that the business men of the
country do o care to give their
time to the public service, and there
fore their criticisms may be ignored.
The charge is no longer sweepingly
true, as. for instance, the organiza-
tion of the federal reserve board suf-
ficiently proves. But there ia another
reason, and 1t goes deeper than the
politician .eupposes, a y the Wall
Street Journal.
There are few rewards in a repub-
lie. But every mar likes to be decor
ated and appreciated. In England
they make him q peer and treat him
with respect; they give him social
prominence and decorations to wear
upon his handsome uniform. They do
this on the continent, also, to an ven
greater extent. But what reward of
the kind have we? The charges that
republics are %ungrateful arc true.
Look al the heroes We have idollzed
on the front pages of the newspapers
only to cruelty them subsequently in
the editorial columns.
What, then, is the prize we offer?
The politician thinks it is money, and
he is wrong. 1t Is power. Money can
buy this, in u social system. Power
can be acquired in other ways, it Is
true; but the tendency is to drive the
best brains of the country into in
dustry and finance. Doubtless few
men would exchange the presidency of
the United States for the senior part
nership in the greatest banking house
at ten times the reward. The fact
proves the contention. 1t is not the
cash value. but the power craved by
ambition. that last infirmity Of noble
minds"
Garry the idea a step further. The
competent business man, by an act of
remuneration involving Il large none
tafy sacrifice. accepts office at Wash
ington. Immediately he finds, that he
is the center Of humiliating intrigue,
the subordinate. In everything but
lame, to popularity hunting politici-
ans whom he feels to be his interiors
In brains. knowledge and sincerity.
What is the inducement to remain In
public service when he has made the
sacrifice? What a directory of our
best men could be compiled by taking
the names Of those who have made
such sacriftces-only to give up the
public service in sheer disgust.
Doubtless conditions are Improving
Congress is legislating to raise the
moral tone Of the business man. Sup
pose the rest of us unite to raise the
intellectual and ethical standard OF
our politicians? This is the constitu.
honal way. and it complies with the
terms of a Law higher than the Con.
stitution.
Grand Forks daily herald. (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1914-1916, 1914-12-24

many Defenders. But no winter
frost has ever touched his heart. He.
himself, has lived the life hat he rec
ommends others to live. and he is a
living excmpli1catton of the value of
his own counsel. Young in spirit as
he was half a%-century ago. kindly and
sympathetic. genial and optimistic.
while giving to others of the best that
was in him, he has won that rare
treasure, not merely the esteem, but
the love of, all who :now him.
Old friend, good friend. a Merry,
Merry Christmas to you, and a Happy
New Year.
Grand Forks daily herald. (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1914-1916, 1914-12-24

prohibition in n place and the most
rigid possible regulation in another.
Just a word as to Mr. Hobson. He
has had a rather remarkable career.
He came into prominence as the re-
suit of a spectacular exploit, and the
attention which he received appears to
have turned his head. He has shown
a delight for the spectacular W
since. and his %championing Of the
of national constitutional prohi-
bition may be classed with some Of
his other bids for fame. His attitude
has been one of narrowness and intol-
erance. He has assumed that he wal
exactly right, and that all men who
did not see quite as he did were
wrong. He has. moreover, been SO
lacking III the Christian virtue of
charity that he has habitually inn
pugned the motives of all who did
not agree with him. and has charged
them with all sorts of corruption. Be-
cause his opponent in the senatorial
primary did not share his views as to
the wisdom of national prohibition, he
charged Underwood, on the public
platform, with being the tool and
hireling Of the liquor interests. Yet,
after the primary, he wired his con-
CALCULATIONS to. Underwood. and ten
dered his support. knowing that if the
charges which he had made we're true,
Underwood vac unfit to be supported,
before or after the primary. And
when the vote on his resolution was
about to be taken, he sought to be-
smirch the reputation of men who
were about to vote against it by MAX
ing a cheap insinuation that they
were actuated by corrupt motives.
Mr.. Hobson is a comparatively
young man. He may learn. But he
has thus far been incapable of learn
ing that he is not the only repository
OF knowledge, and hat men may en-
terrain opinions contrary to his and
still be honest and upright. It takes
some men a long time tt learn these
things, and Mr.. Hobson is a little
slow.
Grand Forks daily herald. (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1914-1916, 1914-12-24

the commissioner said he would in
quire into the proficiency Of that or
ganization. The teacher gave him 4
spelling book and the students lined
up in front of the mighty educator.
He thumbed the book. Then, point-
ing at the first boy, he said:
Spell egypt"
"E-g-g-p-i-t," slowly spelled the
boy.
"wrong." said the commissioner.
and pointing to the next boy:
you spell egypt"
"E-g-g-p-i-t,' spelled the boy.
Wrong. You spell It,"
The next boy spelled 1t the am
way, and the mex and the next.
BAD spoilers, these" commented
the commissioner to the distressed
teacher.
why. Mr.. Commissioner" she pro-
tested, 'they have spelled egypt cor
rectly."
They have not"
Twill you let me see the word in
the book" the teacher asked, tear.
fully. II am sure they have"
Here it is" said the commissioner.
and he pointed to the word Egypt"
vicar-For shame. my lad! What
have these poor little fish done to be
imprisoned upon the day Of rest?
Tommy-Tha-that's what they got
for chasing worms on a Sunday. sir.
Grand Forks daily herald. (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1914-1916, 1914-12-24
DECEMBER.

Under the above caption the Penn
bina Express publishes the following
editorial:
1T is the December time Of the
year. The trees are bare. the NOV
covers the ground. the wind blows
cold and drear. Strcams run slowly
under their icy covers and man and
beast seek shelter. The world sleeps.
Som of us are also in the Deem
Der time of life. We miss the warm
days Of youth. The blood streams
run %sluggishly through the veins,
while the SHOWS of many winters are
gathered about our heads.
But the December Of the year Is
not all dreariness and cold. The pure
white snow SO wonderful in its vast
expanse, SO miraculous In its SYM
eoverlet OF old Mother Earth as she
sleeps. Underneath the ice the brooks
and rivers sing a sweet. low sons Of
the cenes from which they have
come and full of guesses as to their
final destination. Not all the trees arc
odAo AoA IS oCol l. LlcSS dc
the child names them stand even
more wildly green against the white
hillside in this wintertime.
$50 with the old. The stlvered
hair Of the aged may be the crown
of beauty II the life has been we'll
spent: Tho brooks that find a foun-
tain head in a pure heart are less
noisy. but because they now form a
broader stream. Underneath the
snow-covered head are the still liv-
ing thoughts. and many an old man,
like the evergreen against the hill
trast.
December is the month Of the
C~hrist-child, is the month Of tho chill
dfen. Very many (would that 1t were
ally measure the length Of the year
as from Christmas time to Christmas
time. It is the first and to tho very
youthful the beginning and ending
Of tho calendar year. It is the one
day around which all other days re.
volve, In which all other days finally
center.
But because It JIG more blessed
10 give than to receive therefore II
is more a month for the grown-ups
than for the children. The man OF
woman Of mature ear who keeps In
touch and sympathy with little chill.
dren will find the December OF
life a cold. dreay month. The mar
with a Christmas tree In his breast
will always have an evergreen heart
And with a green heart and mind
the body will not grow old nearly sc
fast. The mind car and does contro,
bodily functions to a very great ex.
tent. Love and association with chtl.
dren will help keep you young. Try
1t. DID man, and see
Let your December be full of little
evergreens, let your heart be full o,
Christmas love and cheer and a greer
old age will be yours"
The p~hraseology and the sentimen,
OF the article speak for themselves
We are sure that readers of The Her
aid will be delighted with both. Oh
residents Of the state. and especial,
those who are familiar with it's news
paper history will be further interest
cd in. the fact that the editorial /,
from the pen Of r. A. Wardwell, who
for. thirty. years has been editor O
the-Ptoneer Express. Editor Ward
we'll came to the state a young man
He has seen it grow and rospe an{
he has contributed to it's development
His hair is frosted with the SNOWY q
Grand Forks daily herald. (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1914-1916, 1914-12-24
o o o o o o o o o o o O O O g
o U WITH US Q
Q O O O O o O O O O O O O O O

I'm not at home to that gentleman,
Jane" said the daughter.
You haven't seen his card YETI
protested mother. you don't know
who it is"
True, but it isn't the machine I
am waiting for. a tell by the
honk."
The horse had run away and was
tangled up in the wire. fence at the
side Of the muddy road. It's half
Witted owner had kicked and sworn
and tried to lift the animal-till he
was out Of sorts and covered with
mud.
A well-groomed man came along,
took in the situation and suggested:
Spring the fence back. and. then he
can get his feet free"
The owner of the horse did as he
was told. Now give him a cut with
the whip and he'll get up himself"
This the owner also did. Then he
looked at the horse. up and ready
for travel, looked at himself covered
with mud. and looked at the immacu-
Grand Forks daily herald. (Grand Forks, N.D.) 1914-1916, 1914-12-24

will be voted on in 1918 and become
a law on its receiving a majority of
all the votes cast.
The daily telegram. [volume] (Clarksburg, W. Va.) 1901-1926, 1914-08-27
THE THEATERS|

4 :
The vaudeville for the last half Of
the week at the Odeon theater will be
the Adams and Peters comedy COM
pany In refined comedy, singing and
talking.
The pictures for today include a
Selig comedy entitled 1.-THE Substitute
Heir" This is one of humorist Roy
l.. McCardell's funniest comedies, de-
plotting the laughable incidents which
take place when black baby is sub
sttuted for an heir to millionaire.
A Vitagraph comedy entitled 1.-The
Winning Z Trick" featuring Lillian
Walker, Arthur Ashley, Charles Ed
ridge and Mrs. Kimbal, and an Edison
comedy entitled "An Up-to-D Date. Court
ship" are also shown.
Tomorrow will be shown the ninth
episode of "The Million Dollar Mys-
terry" This episode thrills with
startling action. Florence, when far
out at sea, leaps from an ocean liner
in the dead Of night, battles with the
waves, is finally rescued by fishing
schooner and carried to humble
fisherman's home, but her mind is a
blank. W u
H. s. Sheldon, author Of @rhe
Havoc" has completed a drama
called Dorothy thy g. : 4.
Manager. Robinson is. fortunate in
securing for the Robinson Grand such
q widely. popular attraction as "The
Girl from. Maxim 81, which appears
there tonight. This. company. comes di-
rect from New York and aside from Its
engagement here and at two other
cities in this state, plays nothing but
week stands in the large cities all
season.
"The Girl from Maxim's" Is high
class travesty and extravaganza COM
pany. lt-offers two one act travesties
entitled meet Me at Maxim's" and
The Love Soldier" The former de-
picts night life in New York City, pre-
sents the tango and other modern
dances and is said to be a real sensa-
stion. 1.-THE Love Soldier" deals with
the trials and tribulations of a SOL
dier's life in camp. Both are replete
with catchy comedy and bright mus
ical numbers.
Among the principal women and
comedians are Dainty Eva Null, for
mer Broadway star; Lena LaCouvier,
statuesque prima donna; Helen Doug
las, ingenue; Jack. Honan, king Of
Irish comedians; Fred Russell, He
brew comedian; Martin ]. Guild, the
funny Dutchman; Murray Bernard,
the Beau Brummel Of. the stage and a,
chorus of twenty-four pretty girls who
sing and dance in most delightful
manner.
The daily telegram. [volume] (Clarksburg, W. Va.) 1901-1926, 1914-08-27
ISAAC; B.
Local Horse Finishes Fourth in
Fast Race at Fairinont
Wednesday.

FAIRMONT. Aug. 27.-The largest
first day crowd ever attending the
Fairmont fair Witnessed the races yes
terday afternoon which resulted as
follows: Summary:
First Race, $3.50 Trot, Stake $1,000.
Earlwood l., b 6 by Earl OF
+ Chatam (Crozier) ....1 1 q q i
Jim Red, b 6, by Red Leo
tJamison) ........,..... s 4 1
Bordelon, b. h., by Bingera
(Whitehead) 234A34
Major Stout, CHI h., by Nut
wood Wilkes (Stout) 49,. S 8 4
Trusty Mckinney. br M, by
Mckinney tAllen) ...... 8 8 dis
. Time-2;17, 2:1sM, 2:l7N, 2:17,
Second Race, e.ss Pace, Stake $1,000.
Tredell, b. g., by Tregantle
lRay) Observation-Disclosures. 2 2 1 /
Periolat. b. g., by Klatawah
tGray) $500. 4 1 8 4 2
Present Queen, b. M, by
Searchlight (Jamison) :. s 32s2sS
Miss Gilbert, b m by George
Gilbert (vallery) !. ...,... 81 s4
christobel, blk m by McKo- E
yer (Woods) .........4 54
Silver Brush, & 6 by Bobby
Burns (Stout) .......... 8 drawn
Time 2:15M, 2:t2A. 2:15ss, 2:154,
2:15A.
Mary 3. Pick, blk m by Silk
wood (Barber) ........... II Al
AL billiard, br g., by Abbott
Wilkes (Ruble) ......... 421s2
Florence Mckinney, b. M, by
Wallace Mckinney (valery) . 9 Q g
Isaac B., b g by Gay (vale). 3 A 8 4
Vera b., b m by Hall R Cray dis
Roam Hal, g by Hal de Fac
Blue Bell, b. M, by Directly
lJamison) ............... dis.
Time-2:12. 2:1sA. 2:13A, 2:12M
The daily telegram. [volume] (Clarksburg, W. Va.) 1901-1926, 1914-08-27
HORSE RAGING
For Thirteen S 600 Stakes to
Be Chief Feature of Central
+. ::s West Virginia Fair.

One OF the chief and most interest,"
ing features Of the annual Central
West Virginia Fair to be held Sep
tember 1, 2, 3 and on the beautiful
new fair grounds here, will be the
horse racing, as the association is, d
member Of the celebrated Lake Erie
Trotting Circuit, the king OF the half
milers, and all Of the noted racers OF
the circuit will be brought to the fair.
There Is added interest this year
because the remarkable offering OF
$500 is made for thirteen stake
races and, in addition, special driv-
er's purse of $1,000. Noted American
racers to the astounding number OF
276 have been entered for the various
events. These embrace $3.50 trot,
a 2:25 pace and 2:11 pace for Tues
day, the dirst day; a 2:14 trot, a 2:17
pace and 2:1s trot for Wednesday;
q 2:24 trot, a free for all pace, a 2: 10
pace and saa2.l8l pace for Thursday
and a 2:20 trot, q 2:15 pace and a 2:l6
trot for Friday. It is expected that
other special events will also be held
The daily telegram. [volume] (Clarksburg, W. Va.) 1901-1926, 1914-08-27
Chicago at Philadelphia.
Cleveland at Washi gsons
yEDERAL LEAGUE

Buffalo at Brooklyn.
Pittsburg At Baltimore.
Chicago at st. Louis.
indianapolis at Kansas City.
The daily telegram. [volume] (Clarksburg, W. Va.) 1901-1926, 1914-08-27

I A new farce by Margaret Mayo, the
author of polly of the Circus, !" Erwin
Beds" Baby Mine" and other plays,
issto be produced by Charles Frohman
In October It is in three acts and is
The daily telegram. [volume] (Clarksburg, W. Va.) 1901-1926, 1914-08-27
AMERICAN LEAGUE.

AT Boston R.H.E.
Detroit ....... .O01 001 000-2 1 20
Boston .o04 900 1Ox-5 Z /.
Batteries: Oldham, Cavet and Stan
age. Gregg and Cady,
The daily telegram. [volume] (Clarksburg, W. Va.) 1901-1926, 1914-08-27
81 Didn't Want tosDo IT.

The authors Of Love, watches, y
Robert de Flers. and CASTOR A. de
Caillavet, have written aslyrical legend
In four acts entitled Il Beatrice which
10 founded on story by Charles
Nodier. The music for 1t was COM
posed by Andre Messenger.
The daily telegram. [volume] (Clarksburg, W. Va.) 1901-1926, 1914-08-27

Of our Circuit Court OF Harrison County
at the Clerks ONCE Of our said court
court. on the last Monday In August
1914 to answer q bill IN chancery Ax-s
hibited against him In our said court
by Lottie NJ. Cain; and have then there
this writ. &. ~ N y
Witness. 1. wade German, cltfs Of
our said Court. at'sthe Court HOUSE Of
the said county, sthts93d day Oft A41gnet.
WADE COLEMAN. Clerk.
The daily telegram. [volume] (Clarksburg, W. Va.) 1901-1926, 1914-08-27

At Philadelphia R.H.Es
Chicago 4: -. 200 900 1000 8s, /
Philadelphia q. 900 800 '00x--5 10 i
Batteries Cicotte. Wolfgang and
Mayer. Shawkey and Schang.
At New York R.H.E.
St Louis 100 900 900 0o0-1 8 Q
New York ..clo 900 900, s001-2 9 1
Batteries: Weilman and Agnew.
Brown and Sweeney. Twelve innings.
The daily telegram. [volume] (Clarksburg, W. Va.) 1901-1926, 1914-08-27
order Of duplication.

STATE OF WEST VIRGINIA. ~
County of Harrison, to-wit: s., &.
At rules held in the once OF thee Clerk
Of the Circuit Court of Harrison County.
West Virginia, on the 3rd day Of ,Au-
gust 1914, the following order was
entered: s,sSsN
y Lottie NJ. Cain,
VS.. IN CHANcERY.
John Cain.
The object OF the above styled chan
Gerry cause Is to obtain by the plaintiff.
Lott e. M Cain decree Of soiute dis
yofce from the defendant John Cain
a And It appearing from am afidaYit,
made and filed herein that the said
defendant. John Cain Is a nonresident,
of the State OF West Virginia. 1t IS or
'dered that he do appear here within
one month after the date OF the fifst
publication Of this order. and do what
In, 81
!, y /: WADE COLEMAN, Clerk.
Counsel for Plaintiff
The daily telegram. [volume] (Clarksburg, W. Va.) 1901-1926, 1914-08-27

Counsel for SPlaintif.
The daily telegram. [volume] (Clarksburg, W. Va.) 1901-1926, 1914-08-27
su1r15oNs.

STATE OF swEsT VIRGINIA,
TO the Sheriff Of Harrison. County.
Greeting: (,
You are hereby commanded to summon
John Cain to appear before the Judge