davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Red Cloud chief., 1914-03-12
GAS, DYSPEPSIA
AND INDIGESTION
"Pape'S Diapepsin" settles sour,
gassy stomachs in five
minuteS-Time It!

You don't want a slow remedy when
your stomach is bad-or an uncertain
one-or a harmful one--your stomach
is too valuable; you mustn't injure It.
Pape's Diapepsin is noted for its
speed in giving relief: it's harmless.
ness. its certain unfailing action in
regulating sick, sour, gassy stomachs.
Its millions of cures In indigestion,
dyspepsia, gastritis and other stomach
trouble has made 1t famous the world
over.
Keep this perfect stomach doctor in
your home-keep 1t handy-get a large
ffty.cent case from any dealer and
then IL anyone should eat something
which doesn't agree with them; II
what they eat lays like lead ferments
and sours and forms gas; causes head.
ache. dizziness and nausea; eructa.
tions Of acid and undigested food
remember as soon as Pape's Diapepsin
comes in contact with the stomach all
such distress vanishes. Its prompt.
ness. certainty and ease in overcoming
the worst stomach disorders is a reve-
lation to those who try it.-Adv
The Red Cloud chief., 1914-03-12
PIONEERS OF THE FRONTIER
Red-Blooded Men and Women Were
Those Who Carved an Empire
From Wilderness.

No doubt the run of the continent
has improved the fiber of the Ameri-
can people. or course. the we'll estab-
lished and the intellectuals had no mo-
tive to seek the west; but In energy
and venturesOmenes those who sought
the frontier were superior to the
average of those in their class who
stayed behind. II was the pike rather
than the carp that found their way
out OF the pool. Now. In the main.
those who pushed through the open
door of opportunity left more children
than their fellows who did not Often
themselves members Of large families.
they had fecundity, as 1t we're. In the
blood. With land abundant and the
outlook encouraging. they married
earlier. In the narrow life Of the
young west, love and family wero
stronger interests than in the older
society; hence all married. Thanks
to cheap living and to the need OF
helpers. the big family was welcomed.
Living by agriculture. the west knew
little of cities, manufactures. social
rivalry. luxury and serving class. all
foes Of rapid NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS.
Origins of the American People" by
Prof. Edward A. Ross. in the Century.
The Red Cloud chief., 1914-03-12
HIS GREAT LOVE
FOR HIS PEOPLE
st. Patrick's Confession Shows
How ArdentIy He Longed for
Their Welfare.
Epistle Has Been Declared Worthy Of
the Greatest Of the Teachers Of the
Word-ereastpIate Of Prayer
Short Litany--HIs Synod.

III OW yearningly st. Patrick loved
IL his people may be learned from
the following passage in his Confess
sion. worthy OF st. Augustine or st.
Paul: III l have ever done any good
for the sake OF my God, whom love.
beg him to grant me that l may
shed my blood with these proselytes
and captives for his sake, even though
l should never receive burial, or each
member Of my body should be most
horribly thrown to the dogs and wild
beasts. or the birds Of prey should
feed upon It." (Par. 24.)
His Confession ends with these
words: And this is my confession
before I die" (Par. 49,
For its humility. sweetness. faith,
love and self-sacrifice 1t must be ad.
m;red by all who read It.
The Breastplate Of Prayer Of st.
Patrick is a sort Of short litany pro
The Red Cloud chief., 1914-03-12
A PRAYER.
(By st. Patrick, Apostle Of lre-
land, at Tara's hill.)

At Tara today. the strength
OF God pilot me; the power Of
God preserve me; the wisdom of
God instruct me; the eye OF God
watch over me: the ear of God
hear me; the word OF God give
me sweet talk; the hand OF God
defend me: the way Of God
guide me. Christ be with me;
Christ before me; Christ after
me; Christ in me; Christ under
me; Christ over me; Christ on
my right hand; Christ on my
left hand; Christ on this side;
Christ on that side; Christ at
my back; Christ in the heart
OF every person to whom I
speak; Christ In the mouth of
every person who speaks to me;
Christ in the ear OF every per-
son who hears me. At Tara, to-
day. ] invoke the mighty power
Of the Trinity. Salvation is the
Lord salvation Is the Lords.
Salvation Is Christ's. May thy
salvation. o Lord, be always
with US!
The Red Cloud chief., 1914-03-12
Saint Knew Persecution.

II st. Patrick's conversion Of Ireland
was without persecution in the ordi-
nary sense of the word, as used in the
history OF the church. yet he assures
us: II went about everywhere for
your sakes in many dangers, even to
the furthest district, beyond which no
body lived. and where no one had ever
gone to baptize or to ordain clericS
or to encourage the people; by the
help Of the Lord have done all these
things most faithfully and freely for
your salvation" He tells US even
that ION certain dreadful day they
tried most earnestly to kill me f..
and they threw me into chains. But
on the fourteenth day the Lord deliv-
cred me from their power
The Red Cloud chief., 1914-03-12

the three different degrees of fruit
fulness Of the gospel seed. declaring
that those who are to reap hun
dredfold reward are the bishops and
doctors, who are all things to all
men; those who are to have the sixty
fold are the clergy and widows; the
thirtyfold shall be received by the
laymen who are faithful. He also
places monks and virgins with those
who shall have the hundredfold.
He who does not receive commun.
ion at Easter Is declared to be not q
faithful" Canon 22).
1t is interesting to note that the
synod forbids a man to take his dead
brothers widow to wife. and declares
that she shall be to him only sister
(Canon 25).
Little sympathy was given to avar-
Ice among the clergy: according to
DEGREES w.. VIII. and Kill. while de-
cree XIV. is interesting In showing
that for murder. evil living or con-
sulting auspices the sinner shall do
penance for year and afterward he
shall be absolved by the priest.
After these follow few "other
canons attributed to ST. Patrick" then
the "Charter of st. Patrick" on the
antiquity Of the Church OF Glastonbury
In England. very quaint and enter
tanning. Next We have "The Book of
st. Patrick the Bishop on the Three
Dwellings" profound yet practical
and unctuous sermon on heaven, hell
and this world.
The Red Cloud chief., 1914-03-12
liFE'S ROAD
Smoothed by Change Of Food.

Worry Is a big load to carry and an
unnecessary one. When accompanied
by indigestion 1t certainly is cause for
the blues.
But the whole trouble may be easily
thrown of and life's road be made
easy and comfortable by proper eating
and the cultivation OF good cheer.
Read what Troy woman says:
Two years ago made the acQuaint-
ance Of Grape-Nuts and have used tho
food once a day and sometimes twice.
ever since.
AT the time / began to use It life
was burden. was for years affiict-
ed with bilious sick headache. caused
by indigestion. and nothing seemed to
relieve me.
The trouble became so severe !
had to leave my work for days at .
time.
my nerves were In such a state
could not sleep and the doctor said
was on the verge Of nervous prostrar
ton. saw an adv. concerning Grape
Nuts and bought a package for trial.
what Grape-Nuts has done for me
is certainly marvellous. can now
sleep like a child, am entirely free
from the old trouble and have not had
a headache in over year. l feel like
q new person. l have recommended 1t
TO others. One man ! knew ate prin-
cipally Grape-Nuts while working on
the ice all winter. and said he never
felt better I'm his life"
Name given by Postum Co., Battle
Creek. Mich. Read "The Road to
MELVILLE" In pkgs. "Theres Reas
SON.
Ever read the above Iettert A new
enc appears from time to time. They
are genuine, true, and fall OF human
Interest.
The Red Cloud chief., 1914-03-12
Shoes for National Guard.

A carload of hiking-shoes, the first
peace donation of footwear ever made
to the Nebraska National guard, has
Just been received at headquarters in
Lincoln The consignment will be
stored in the armory at present and
will likely be given out at the state
camp this year If the plan 10 join
with other states in the maneuvers at
Fort Riley, Kas.. is followed out, then
the shoes will be given out previous
to the departure for that encampment.
The shoes, according to General Hall,
are of a durable quality
The Red Cloud chief., 1914-03-12
Names Phillips for maione,s Job.

Washington, March s. William
Phillips OF Boston was nominated by
President Wilson third assistant SEQ
rotary OF state. succeeding Dudley
Field Malone, now collector of the
port OF New York. Phillips served
as third assistant secretary OF state
during the Taft administration.
The Red Cloud chief., 1914-03-12

IuuCLi pCbOSA sss
did when the doctor
was treating me. l
don't suffer any
bearing down pains
at all now and / sleep
we'll. ! cannot say
enough for Lydia E.
Pinkham's Vegeta-
BILE Compound and
Liver Pills as they
have done 80 much
for me. I am enjoy
The Red Cloud chief., 1914-03-12
Then the Apparatus Is in Demand.

a visitor was being shown through
lid lifting athletic" club. The chief
attraction seemed to be the liquid
gymnastic department. However, there
vas II cheaply equipped gymnasium
which showed evidences of disuse.
There was dust on the Indian clubs
and cobwebs on the dumbbells.
Don't the members ever use this
equipment" the visit asked
"Oh, yes, occasionally-when fight
starts" was the reply.
The Red Cloud chief., 1914-03-12
Bio Fire In New Orleans.

New Orleans. March 1.-Two sheds
of the Louisiana Railway and Naviga-
ton company. on new Basin canal
here containing 1900 bales of cotton
and several freight cars, were de-
stroyed by fire. The loss is $250000.
The Red Cloud chief., 1914-03-12
No Joke.


At the Chicago Athletic club .
game had been put up on q cynical
old bachelor. The man had waited
from eight to ten in the park on .
snowy evening in obedience to .
pale pink. violet-scented note that his
friends had faxed In order to sed II
he was really as confirmed woman
hater as he claimed.
Turning up at the club for q night
cap. the duped and frozen bachelor
was very sullen and sulky when his
friends derided him. He saw no fun
whatever In the fake note.
George AIDE. noticing his black and
lowering looks. gave q loud laugh and
said:
What a skinfiint you must bol
Won't even laugh at a Joke, eh. II it's
at your own expense!"
The Red Cloud chief., 1914-03-12
WATERY BLISTERS ON FACE

Smithville. Ind.--"Six months ago
our baby girl, one year old. had q few
red pimples come on her face which
gradually spread causing her face to
become very irritated and a fiery red
color. The pimples on the child's face
were at first small watery blisters, just
a small blotch on the skin. She kept
scratching at this until in q few days
her whole cheeks were fiery red color
and instead Of the little blisters the
skin was cracked and scaly looking
and seemed to itch and burn very
much.
I'VE used q number Of remedies
which seemed to give relief for short
time then leave her face worse than
ever. Finally we got cake Of Cuti.
cura Soap and box OF Cuticura Oint.
ment. l washed the child's face with
very warm water and Cuticura Soap,
then applied the Cuticura Ointment
very lightly. After doing this about
three times a day the itching and
burning seemed entirely gone in two
days time. Inside of two weeks time
her face seemed we'll. That was eight
months ago and there has been no re.
turn of the trouble" (Signed) Mrs.
A. X. Wooden, Nov. 4, 1912.
Cuticura Soap aud Ointment sold
throughout the world. Sample OF each
free, with 32-p. Skin Book. Address post
card "Cuticura, Dept. L. Boston. ADV
The Red Cloud chief., 1914-03-12
Father Asks Sons Arrest.

Los Angeles. Cal, March 5.--Ray-
mond NJ. Kane. nineteen years old.
was arrested here on telegraphic in.
structions from his father. ii. 8. Kane
of Gates City. Va. to the Los Angeles
police
The Red Cloud chief., 1914-03-12

Tossing belief In and invoking the
Blessed Trinity. Our Lords incarna-
ton, resurrection and ascension;
calling on the powers of heaven, of
earth, etc. invoking Christ for himself
and all OF his.
From other works not surely com
posed by st. Patrick, though probably
rejecting the beliefs and practices of
his times or those soon after him in
Ireland, the synod OF st. Patrick is
composed of 81 canons. The twelfth
Is entitled: On our obligation toward
the dead. And in the eighteenth is
given an original Interpretation Of
The Red Cloud chief., 1914-03-12

In this age cash will keep friends
longer than diplomacy.
The Red Cloud chief., 1914-03-12
Sufficient Proof.

Prisoner-All want Is justice!
Lawyer-Then can save you from
Il on the grounds of insanity!
The Red Cloud chief., 1914-03-12
Anti.Removai Organization.

The beginnings OF an organization
with which to oppose university re-
moval were put on foot at meeting
in Lincoln in which university alumni
largely predominated. An executive
committee OF seven was named with
plenary powers. 1t has the right to
perfect an organization throughout the
state, to collect and disburse funds.
and II II deems necessary, to enlarge
its own membership. This committee
Is to exist until after the election at
which the location question Is to be
settled The members of this commit
tee, as announced by Chairman Pol
lard. are as follows: +. M. Pollard Of
Nehawka, chairman: Fred G. Hawks
by of Auburn. secretary: c. M. Skiles
OF David City, Val Keyser Of Nebras-
Rain OF Fairbury and Miss Charlotte
Morley of Alliance.
A draft covering the $1,000 loss
which the state suffered in the failure
of the First National bank at Superior.
has been received by State Treasurer
George from the Leon Bonding Co. OF
Omaha, which Unidentified the state
against loss.
Good.natured bandying and rich
renditions OF songs of his own compost
ton in the minstrel shows at the peni-
Tertiary brought attention OF local
people to Thomas Mcintyre, sent up
from Cheyenne county for murder, and
he has been paroled to Judge w II.
England OF Lincoln. Governor More
head signed the parole after he be-
came convinced that Mcintyre had no
hand in the murder Of the Sidney
Waterman, for which he and Harry Ne
VILE and Con Sullivan were convicted
A confession signed by Neville states
that Mcintyre was not in the yards
The Red Cloud chief., 1914-03-12
WHAT $40 DID
FOR THIS WOMAN
The Price She Paid for Lydia
E.Pinkham'sV Vegetable Com
pound Which Brought
Good Health.

Danville, va.-"I have only spent ten
dollars on your medicine and l feel so
The Red Cloud chief., 1914-03-12
Correction

Correction.
my poor husband got mixed up in
nocently in that shooting ARRAY, and
they brought him home to me half
dead"
mo. madam: only half shot"
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1914-01-23
BOY CAUSED ACCIDENT.
Child May Not be Punished For Spik-
ing Of Rails.

Charlotte. n. c., JAM % Two
ntra-state commissioners COZ Ected
1 hearing Wednesday afternoon into
the fatal railway accident, which oc-
Cured last Sunday night near David
son, N. c.. hurting Engineer J. I
Curiee and Fireman a. H. wilson &c
their death, the wreckage covering
their bodies.
That Rufus Hall, 8 year old son o.
of Mr.. and Mrs. John @. Hall, Of Da-
wilson, placed an iron spike on the
rail that threw the locomotive. ter
der and combination coach eff the
track was the general verdict Of
Southern Railway officers, who in
vestigated the wreck.
A sister of the boy, Myrtle Hall
8 years old, admitted that she and
her older sister,, Sadie, and her bro
Their Rufus, had walked along the
railway track Sunday afternoon and
shat the boy had place: a number
Of pieces OF coal and other articles OF
The rails. Sadie Hall, II years old.
who works in a cotton m J, also
told of seeing her brother place OBJ
.tructions on the rails.
The commissioners declined TO give
out the result of their examination.
Il is not believed, however. that the
railway company Will insist upon
having the boy punished by taking
him into court as no malice was
shown in the mischcvious pranNS.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1914-01-23
SAY GOODBYE TO CON-
STIPATION AND SICK
HEADACHE

Calomcl Out of Job Since Hot
Springs Liver Buttons Arrived in
Town.
No reason on earth why any one IN
this town should put up with a lazy.
tubborn, mean or rebelious liver.
ince wonderful HOT SPRINGS LlV-
IR BUTTONS are in every drug
store here.
Forget about calomel right now;
better throw it in the ash heap along
with your pills, salts, oils and other
nakeshifts. You won't want any
rore to do with any of them once
YOU give blissful, gentle Hol
SPRINGS LIVER BUTTONS a
chance.
They surely are great blessing to
I'D people and women who suffer
from chronic constipation. They are
joyfulIy satisfying and leave nc
ad after effects.
Take them for what the doctors OF
Hot Springs prescribe them. For
constipation, nervousness, cIogged
liver, upset stomach, dizziness, sick
headache, malaria, laziness, lack
# appetite; absence Of am
.,ition and for sallow and pimpIy skin
Their action will prove happy reve'
alton to you.
All druggists, everywhere 20 cents
Sample free from Hot Springs
Chemical Company, (Hot Springs
Arkansas. N@o'
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1914-01-23
toXication.

toxication.
One typical case is given by the
doctor. He undertook to cure man
who wished the treatment, but who
resisted it, just as the typical NOR
phinomaniac does. The patient
wept, implored and reproached the
doctor, but was dosed and kept from
his lady love at increasing intervals
until he lost his Complaint" u
This new cure will not be popular
with the young who are in the first
dream of love, but it has great posi-
bilities with older persons whose
foolishness increases with age and
with others who are not dircrimina-
ting in the bestowal Of affection.
And yet it would seem that science
has greater opportunity in the OPP
posite direction. If some serum that
would restore languishng or lost
love could be discovered, the prob
lem of divorce would solve itself.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1914-01-23
Washington Southern Ry.

Schedule in effect January 5, 1914.
For Washington and points north
daily at 7:O8 a. m, S.23, S.31, 1909,
1884 a. M, 1901, 2:3O Through train
for. New York, via P. R. R. 6:19.
3:18, 1888 p. H., week days at 6:O7
P. NJ, Sundays only 8:O7 P. NJ.
For Fredericksburg, Richmond, and
points south at 4:97, 1853, (local) and
-0:17 a. NJ, 1916, 1929 SIT QocaD
sgt, 9:57, 1907 p. M, daily.
Accommodation for Fredericksburg
1t l1:l3 H., daily except Saturday,
when train leaves 2:1S pm. This train
runs through to Milford except Sat-
fridays and Sundays.
NOTE:-Tires Of arrival and de
parture and connections not gua1ap.'
teed.
~. =. TAYLOR, Traffic. Mgr
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1914-01-23
WASHINGTON-V lRGINIA
RAILWAY CO.
In Effect November l. 1913.

Leave Alexandria for Washington
Week Days A. NJ. 800, $40, sos
6.20, $50, $40, Cos, 7 o., Z 10, Z go
74O $50. 500. S15 S25, $50, $50
$40, $50, $50, 1910, 1870, 1850
lilo. II. 25x, II. 30, 11.50.
P. NJ 1910, 1225x, 1890, 1880
10, 1.25x. / 80, 1.50, 2.10, 2.25x,2.3O
$50, 3.O5, 3.25x, 3.35, $50, 41O.
4.25, 80, 4 40 4.55, $40, 5.25
5.35. 5. so, Sos, 6. 20, $50, 6.45, 30
is, 7.25, 7.36, 500, $50, 800
$50. 300, 80, lilo ll.55.
AM. Sundays-7.0O 7.35, $40, $50
$40, 900. 920. 9 40, 10 90, 1920
10 40, HOO, ll20, 11.46.
Noon-l2.00.
p. M.-12. 20. -. 40, 100, 1.2O, 1.40
, 90. . 90 24O,3 0O,3 20, 3 40. 4 00,4 20
i. 40, 5. 90. 20, $40, 600, 80, $40
100. 7 20. 7.40, 500, $50, 900, $50
10. 90 1870, Ito.
Leave Alexandria for Mt. Vernon
Week Days.-A Nh .35. 6.46, I. 3n
8.5l, 10 .25, II. %, = P. NJ. - 1925
l.25. 2.25, $50. 40, ). 80, SIC
1855. g so, Q so. 10. so, 11.50.
SUNDAYS.-A. NJ 100, $50
$50. 1870, II. 30.-P. M.-12.3n
|. 30 go. $50, 4.30, $50, $50
80. SIG, 1916.
All trains leave Washington from
9TH and Pa. Ave-, opposite Post
Office.
XThrough Mt. Vernon Trains.
s. Daily. %"Daily Except Sundays
and holidays.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1914-01-23
SOUTHERN RAILWAY.
PREMIER CARRIER OF TIE
SOUTH.
In Effect January IS, 19f.

In Effect January is, 1871.
N. B.-Following schedule figures
are published only as information ana
are not guaranteed.
Trains leave Union Station. Alex
andria.
Tat A. NJ, Daily-Locaf between
Washington & Danville delivers con-
nection daily except Sunday at Or
ange to c. & O., No. 403 for Cor ons-
vile and Richmond.
SAT A. M-Daily-Local for lar
rsonburg and way stations. Eltfet
parlor car.
9:07 A. M.-Daily-U. S. Fast Nail
stops only for passengers to pants
south to which scheduled to stop.
First class coaches; Sleeping cars to
Birmingham and New Orleans. Din
ing car service. Stops at Ca'ver-
ton to let off Warrenton branch lass
engers.
i0:57 4. M.--Daiiy-Mai tra;n.
coaches for Manassas, Ware ton,
Charlottesville, Lynchburg, Dar vile
and Greensboro. Sleeping car rom
Greensboro to Atlanta.
4:22 P. M.-Week day-limite1 fol
Warrenton, Charlottesville and lar
risonburg.
ASP F.. NJ, Daily = Birmir" ham
Special. Sleeping cars between NeW
York, Atlanta, Columbus, Ann tor,
Birmingham. Through first lass
coaches between Washington, ! Ian
Ia, and Birmingham. Dining CO ser
vice. ouIiit to California {; =.
1852 u. M.-Week day. Ii ted
for Harrisonburg and way st lorS
on Manassas branch, also for Var
renton. Pullman Buffet parIor airs.
SIP P. M.-Except SUNDAY .3c"i
Cor warrentOn.
6:12 P. M.-The Southern's s nth
eastern Limited, for Ashevillc. Co
Iumbia, Charleston, Aiken, Ausrstai,
Savannah and Jacksonville. Tn ugh
Pullman Drawing room sle' ?lng
cars, coaches, dining cars.
11:02 A. M.-Daily-Atlan.a pc
.ial. Solid Pullman train, sle' ing
.ars to AshcviIle, Charlotte, NJ ana
md Macon. Dining Car Service.
1927 p. M.-Daily-Washir: ton
and Chattanooga Limited (via L. 1ch-
burg.) First class coaches and ?sp-
ing cars to Roanoke, knoA lille,
Chattanooga. Sleeper to New Or
cans, Washington to Roanoke. Din
ing car service.
11:O2 P. M.-Dai!y-New Iork'
md New Orleans Limited. All 'ull-
man train. Club and Observ lion
.ars to New Orleans. Dining CIR
service.
l:27 A. M.-Daily-Memphis spe-
.ial. Sleeping car and coaches for
Roanoke, Knoxville, Nashville, Chat-
lanooga, and Memphis. Dining Car
service. Washington sleeping cars
open 10 p. m.
For detailed schedule, figures,
tickets, Pullman reservations, ETC.,
apply to
WILLIAM G. LEHEW.
Union ticket agent, Alexandria, Va;
z. II. COAPMAN, Nice-Pres., ana
General Manager.
S. H. HARDW1CK, Pass. Traf.
Manager.
l.. S. BROWN. Gen'l. Agent.
c. ". WESTBURI. asst. Gen. Ag,.
Washington, D. &.
Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1914-01-23
AFTER PASSING YEARS.
Alexandria Testimony Remains Tn.
shaken.

/.
{ Time is; the best test of truth.
Here is an Alexandria story that has
stood the test of time. 1t is story
with point which will come straight
home to many of us.
Mrs. W. j. Whalen, 1103 Prince
street, Alexandria, Va, says: Il will
lingly repeat the statement | gave for
Doan's Kidney Pills some time back,
as it is all true. I never let an OPP
portunity pass to recommend this
remedy. Doan's Kidney Pills cure
me of constant pain in the small Of
my back. After | took them my health
was better and had no more dizzy
spells or headaches"
Mrs. Whalen is only one of the
many Alexandra people who have
gratefully endorsed Doan's Kidrey
Pills. If your back aches--if your
kidneys bother you, don't simply ask
for kidney remedy-ask distinctly
for Doan's Kidney Pills, the same
that Mrs. Whalen ha6-the remedy
backed by home testimony. soc at
all stores. Foster Milburn Co., pro-
prietors, Buffalo, New York. when
YOUR back is lame-remember the
name w