The Washington herald., 1914-03-30
Statesmen, Real and Near.
nv FREp c. KELLY.

a doctor. now a Representative, does
watchdogging over the Treasury, and
seems to try almost as hard to save
government money as Dick" Austin.
of Tennessee. does to spend IL. Both
he and Austin were members OF a COM
mittee from the House OF Represent
atives that journeyed to Colorado re-
Gently to see about the coal strike at
Trinidad. Foster was chairman Of the
committee and opposed any needless
expense. He would not stand for taxi
cabs when they were going any place
within walking distance. and insisted
that private baths in a hotel are not
only expensive, but are undemocratic
and border on snobbery.
When they got to Colorado they met
up with a former member of Congress
who knew them all. and who, just for
old times sake. offered to give them
legal counsel.
After they had started homeward.
the other members Of the committee
amused themselves by arranging fake.
kilograms from the ex-Representatiye
to Foster. asking for payment of $3.50
for legal services
Foster pounded his chest and de-
clared that he would never allow any
such payment, but the others shook
their heads gravely and said they fear
ed he couldn't help 1t.
IF l did pay it," declared Foster.
wrathfully. 1T would be only the sec
ond time in my life I was ever stung-"
And what was the other timer?
they asked. full of curiosity.
The time I went into a restaurant
and bought myself a caviar sandwich"
replied Foster. savagely.
Representative Edmund Platt, who Is a
newspaper publisher Of Poughkeepsie.
y. Y, knows more things that are true
about birds than anybody in Congress.
Whenever he can collect a little spare
time. Platt puts dull statecraft behind
him and sets forth into the woods and
fields to listen to the song and twitter Of
the birds. Sparrows. robbins, fiamingoes,
storks. crows. wrens-nO matter what
kind OF birds he secs. PIatt knows them
all by sight. II it's sitting still he can
tell it by its plumage. II flying. by its
gait. And IL he can't see the stork or
linnet or cockatOO or whatever the bird
Is, he can identify it by its song. A bird
finds II practically impossible to fool
Platt. The blackbird that tries to pass
itself of on Platt for a quail would pre-
sent an absurd spectacle.
Platt grew to mature manhood without
knowing any more about birds than any
body else. and never even raised a pair
OF pigeons in his boyhood. He knew
sparrows from humming birds and recog-
nized one or two other varieties at sight.
but that was about the total of his bird
knowledge. One day, 4 few years ago,
he visited the home of John Burroughs.
the naturalist, who lives not far from
Poughkeepsie. Burroughs made him
bird enthusiast and ever since then he
has been paying close heed to the Chirp
OIr little feathPred friends
Rarely does Platt venture out of the
house without his bird book and his opera
glasses in his pocket.
A bird may take the view Of the one
in the poem and assert: Nobody knows
but my mate and l, where our nest and
nestlings lie. Chee. chee. chee."
But that bird is wrong. For Platt knows.
One morning recently Platt paused in a
little park on his way up TO Capitol Hill
to fix his opera glasses on bird that was
going twee. twee, twee in a mighty oak
tree. Innocent pedestrians stopped to
look. wondering what manner of man or
beast Platt had sighted in the tree. One
old fellow. however. was smarter than
the rest. AS he passed he remarked out
of the corner of his mouth to Platt:
I've seen YOU practical jokers be-
fore. Youll stare up yonder a long time
DCAOiC SOd ~ SCI " 4Oth-
William Jennings Bryan. Secretary of
State, and His EXcellency J. ]. Jusserand,
Ambassador OF the French Republic
have become almost chummy since Mr..
Bryan landed his present position. Jus
serand drops in on Bryan with the utmost
informality whenever he feels like it,
without waiting for diplomatic day. and
whenever they meet they crack jokes
with each other.
Not long ago Jusserand made a series
of eight or nine informal calls on Bryan
to talk over a little diplomatic project.
They agreed on what should be done and
everything was arranged. but Jusserand
could not bring himself to depart entirely
from custom. and so came around one
afternoon TO present his proposition in
formal diplomatic language. This greatly
amused Bryan.
I'll think the matter over" said he.
but you have given me a severe shock
Why haven't you told me about this be-
fore?"
Representative James Francis Burke
journayed a time ago to the classic little
college town Of Grove City. Pa, to de-
liver an address on Money" Shortly be-
fore the date set for Burkes address.
had gone awry with the
system at the town and the
board OF health had been called on to
find the cause of l,l0O cases Of sudden
illness.
But Burke knew nothing about the
troubles with the water system, and the
opening remark OF the chairman of the
reception committee was enough to
startle even q sterner spirit than he
Glad to see you. Mr.. Burke" said
the chairman: but our audience won't |
be as large as we had expected. Within !
twenty-fOur hours after It was announced
that you were TO speak here more than |
a thousand of our people were taken |
sick. and most OF them are still in bed
tCopyrisht. 1910. by Fred e. Kelly. All nights !