The Salt Lake tribune. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1890-current, 1914-03-01
John Henry on the Troupers'
TT you'll look real close you'll
/ find Splashburg on map OF
u the Middle West.

Careless tIdNclClS SIaiSC
and wait for the other train,
which is always late.
A week ago | happened to be
one of those careless travellers.
marooned in Splashburg, and
having a wicked hour or two to
kill | strolled over to the Com
mercial House.
Steb Stephens is the name OF
the head clerk at the CONNER
cial House in Splashburg, Steb
has been throwing keys at the
wall for long time and he
knows how to burn the beefers.
He played the Big Time once.
Yes, years ago he was a bell hop
at the old Willard in Washing
ton and after that he jumped
to Chicago as night porter at the
old Sherman House; so what
Steb doesn't know about the ho-
tel business isn't worth whim-
pering over.
Steb gave me a brief outline
of his life's history and was just
starting in to tell me about the
battle in the Civil War in which
his father was shot and who shot
him when feverish old party
with Persian rug trimmings on
the end of his chin squeezed up
and began to let a peep out OF
him about the pie he had eaten
for dinner.
Calm yourself" said Smiling
Steb, "and tell me where it bit
you"
"Bit me! Bit mel" snarled
the old party with the tapestry
chin piece. Nothing of the
kind, sir! l want you to know,
sir, that your pie isn't fit to eat,
sir"
tCut it out" suggested Steb.
Cut it out, sir! How can |
cut it out when I've eaten it,
sir? It's an outrage, and l shall
leave this hotel tomorrow" said
Omar Khayyam.
with the exception of $31.72
balance due, that will be about
all from you," said Steb.
'1'll see the proprietor" said
the old party, moving away, with
a face on him like four dollars in
bad money.
I'VE get it good and plenty
every day." said Steb, and Just
then something about six feet
tall, wearing a slouch hat and a
gilt mustache, fell against the
counter, grabbed the register
and buried stub pen in its
pages.
After looking over the result
| decided the strangers first
name must be Spider, because it
looked like one on the register.
"Bath?" queried Steb.
"Only during hot wave, "
said Spider.
Steb went to the ropes, but he
came up smiling, as usual
= American OF European p
asked Steb.
Neither" said Spider. Don't t
you see I'm from Jersey City,"
Going to be with us long?"
inquired Steb.
"Say, Bub, you're wearing
medals for asking questions,
now ain't you?' answered Spi-
der. You Just push me into a
stall and lock the gate. I'm
tired"
Front! Show this gentleman
to 49," said Steb, side-stepping
to avoid punishment.
Then Sweet William, the Boy
Drummer, hoped into the ring
for the next round.
Willie peddles pickles for the
fun he gets out of it.
1t is Willie's joy and delight
to get a ginger-ale bun on anc
rccite "Ostler joe"
When trained down to 95 fiat
Willie can get up and beat the
clapper off "Curfew Shall MOI
Ring Tonight"
When Willie gets strangle
hold on "Sheridan's Ride" yot
can hear horses galloping out
side.
It's the rest Of the community
getting out of harms way.
"Any mail?" inquired Willie
All the mail that Willie eve;
gets is a postal card from tn,
pickle factory every two week
asking him if the people alon,
his route have all lost their ap
petites.
mo literature for you," Ste1
answered.
''Stranpe said Willie "n,-